#nobodyaskedforthis

[zest-scribble]

I never asked for this

I don’t care if I get called a prude for this, but regardless if they are a human or a bot ,I never gave my consent , so once again begone Thot ! 🧐

[hockeytrashgoblin]

Guess the song bb

Okie dokie friendos. I have been gone for a while because health is important apparently?? Who woulda guessed it. Anyway I was sick and sad but nOW I’M BACK BBS. William Nylander doing the keke challenge or whatever the fuck it’s called. Also was inspired by Jenna and Julien podcast games sooooo here is the result. Hope you enjoy. Or don’t. Up to you really but I like the way it turned out so rad *Finger guns at you*

“Hey babe?” William asked coming into the room and sitting beside me on the counter where I was baking some peanut butter cookies.

“Yeah?”

“Can I ask you something? You can feel free to say no but it could be fun.”

“What is it Willy?” he had peaked my interest with this. You could never tell what he would ask, it was always a surprise.

“Weeeell you know the Leaf Nation website?”

“Yeah of course. What does that have to do with me though?”

“The producers thought it would be a fun idea to bring our girls for a show.”

“What kind of show?”

“Ours specifically would be a game seeing if I can guess your favourite songs. All of them would be games like that but ours is music because you like it a lot and honestly I think they think I’m going to be bad at it.” he said laughing at the end.

“I would love to do that baby, it sounds fun.”

“Okay good because I kinda already said we would do it.” he had a sheepish smile and I just hit his arm with a dish towel.

“You knew I’d say yes.” I stood in between his legs and hugged him. “I can never say no to you.”

“I know, it’s cute.” he said giving me a chaste kiss before jumping down from the counter. “Now you should maaaybe make a song list because we film this thing on Tuesday.”

“William! It’s Monday today!”

“Well I mean you’ve got all evening and tomorrow morning.”

“How long does this list have to be?”

“Probably about 50 songs roughly?”

“Oh my god..okay. I’ll do it after my cookies are done.”

The next day William woke me up much too early for my liking. To be fair I asked him to so I could make myself look presentable for this shoot. I was in the bathroom sitting on the floor curling my hair when he poked his head in, leaning on the door frame.

“Why are you doing all of this?”

“I don’t want to embarass you by looking like a bridge troll for all the fans.”

“You don’t ever look like a bridge troll. You’re beautiful always.”

“Shut up.” I said quietly rolling my eyes.

“It’s true babes. I’m going to make breakfast while you get ready.”

“Okay sounds good bean.” a little while after William left I had finally finished curling my hair. Or so I had thought. It had completely fallen straight again because I forgot to put hairspray in. I took a deep breath and put the curling iron down. I was really frustrated and pouty. It was still early, I could pout if I wanted to. I made my way downstairs to the kitchen and shoved my face into Willy’s back making him laugh.

“Hi there.”

“Hi.” I said mumbling into his back.

“What’s the matter (Y/N)?”

“Look at my dumb hair.” he turned around to see the half straight hair and the hair that was currently straightening itself.

“Oh baby, you forgot to put in hairspray in between layers didn’t you?”

“Yeah.” I said pouting again.

“No need to pout darling.”

“I just want to look pretty and not embarrass you but nothing is working out this morning.”

“You don’t ever embarrass me. Never. You could go in a big sweater with the hood up and leggings and you’d still look beautiful.”

“I might just have to be cozy today..” he came over and grabbed my face with his hands.

“I love when you dress cozy. You always look so damn cute.” he gave me a little kiss and I smiled into it. “Now go get dressed while I finish your breakfast you cutiepie.”

“Okay.” I kissed him again and went upstairs to find my favourite leggings. I quickly found them and put them on. I then went through the closet to try to find a big sweater. Mine were all dirty so I took one of William’s Leafs long sleeve shirts. It was huge on me but it looked cute and I was cozy so I didn’t care much. I put on a beanie and ran back downstairs.

“Wooooooow! Cutest lady I’ve ever seen.”

“Noo be quiet.” I said covering my smile with my sweater paws making him smile wider as he brought the food to the table.

After breakfast we lounged around for a little bit before we started driving to the ACC. We got there about 30 minutes before we started shooting and just hung out again for a little while. I put lavs on me and William while we were just waiting around and got them synced to the camera. William and Kasperi were teasing me for knowing how to do it all, but the cameraman who was running late appreciated the heck out of me. A few minutes later I was sitting across a small table from William.

“Okay so Will, you’re going to introduce yourself and (y/n) and say what we’re doing in this video. (y/n) can jump in if she wants but we just want you guys to interact like you normally do.”

“Alright.” he said.

“No problem.” I said smiling to him. And then we were being counted in.

“Hi guys I’m William Nylander and this is my beautiful girl (y/f/n). We’re going to be playing a game today right babe?”

“Yeah! It’s a fun game where we find out just how much attention Willy pays to what’s going on around him. I’ve made a list of my favourite songs and he has to guess them from bits and pieces of the songs.”

“Okay but do I just have to get the song?”

“Nah boi, you need the artist too.”

“Are you actually joking?” he asked smile dropping.

“No bb. You gotta get them both.”

“Pfft that’s fine.”

“Yeah okay.” I said sarcastically rolling my eyes at him. I pulled my legs up on the chair and got ready to start the game. “Are you ready to start ya big baby?”

“I guuuess.” he said sighing.

“Okay. Just a heads up none of the artists repeat, and they’re songs I’ve liked since the 10th grade until last week.”

“I hate it here.”

“Loooove yooou.” I say blowing him a kiss.

“Alright whatever let’s just start this game.” he said laughing.

“Are you ready?”

“Um yeah I’m gonna crush it.”

“We’ll see I guess. Here’s the first song. If you don’t get it I’m going to be personally insulted.” I put on the part of Fergalicious when Fergie is doing her fast rap part. He listened carefully for a few seconds.

“That’s Fergalicious by Fergie. Predictable to say the least.”

“Yeah you got it!”

“You made me learn it so you wouldn’t have to sing all parts by yourself there was no way I wouldn’t have gotten that one.” he said laughing and smiling sweetly at you.

“Okay next song!” I put on dancing in the street by David Bowie and Mick Jagger. I stopped it after a few seconds. “Alright cutie, what’s the song?”

“That’s all I get?!”

“That’s plenty!”

“Oh god.” he said putting his face in his hands. “Um...is it..is it David Bowie?”

“He’s one of the people in it. Who’s the other and what’s the song?”

“I honestly have no clue (y/n).”

“Disappointing. Dancing in the streets by Mick Jagger and David Bowie.”

“Whatever, next.” he said brushing it off.

“Okay baby what’s this one?”

“Sos from mama mia. It’s Meryl Streep and Pierce Brosnan.” he said after the opening half a second of piano.

“Yeah!”

“I knew there would be a mama mia one on here. You’re obsessed.”

“Nooo I just love it. Anyway next song.” I put on a part of this song where there was no lyrics at all just instrumentals and William sighed.

“I know that’s Halsey but I don’t know which one.”

“Take a guess.”

“Which one is the strange one? Strange love?”

“Yes you go babe!”

“Yes! Alright let’s go.” he reached over for a high five and I hit his hand with me shirt covered hand making him giggle. “You’re so cute.”

“Shut uuuuup.” I played the next song and William just looked confused.

“I think this is beach boys. You like them a lot.”

“You’re right it is the beach boys but which one?” he looked more confused as he thought. “William Nylander you can’t be serious. Come on babe you have to know this..”

“Surfing USA?”

“Oh. My. God.” I said resting my hand over my eyes. “Willy. I first heard this song on baby muppets the day my brother was born.”

“OH! Kokomo!”

“Yes. You don’t get the point though. That was pitiful.”

“Boo you.” he said pouting and I stuck my tongue out putting on the next few songs. He had gotten 10 in a row wrong and he was getting annoyed and I was laughing so hard I was crying.

“Okay baby let me give you an easy one.”

“You said that about the last 3.” I put the song on and he listened carefully.

“Come on I’ve been listening to this song for like a week straight on repeat.”

“It’s do it with you but I don’t know his name..is it Andrew something?”

“Yeah it’s Andrew Hyatt. I’ll give you that one. Good job lemur.”

“Thank you lemur.”

“Here’s another easy one.”

“You literally got that song from me. Take it or leave it by great good fine ok.”

“You got it! I didn’t think you would since you didn’t get how I want ya and I got that from you too.”

“You be quiet little missy.” he said winking at me.

“Okay next.” I went to the song and pushed play. “If you don’t get this we’re getting a divorce.”

“We aren’t even married!” he said laughing super hard. The song started and he started singing along to the la’s in crocodile rock. I did too, but I had been singing along to all of them. “That’s the crocodile rock by Elton John.”

“Yeah bb!”

“Yay no divorce.”

“Silly Willy we aren’t even married. Dummy.” he laughed again and he cried a little from laughing so hard. “Okay next.”

“No fair. This isn’t even in English (y/n).”

“So what’s the name of the song?”

“I have absolutely no idea. I don’t understand one word of this to even guess.”

“Do you know who sings it?”

“I think Nicky Jam.”

“Yes! It’s X. Solarte’s walk up song.”

“Baseball?” I nodded smiling. “Classic. I’m not shocked about that at all honestly.”

“Here’s the next one.” I put it on and started dancing to it dramatically making William laugh.

“That’s Billie Jean by Michael Jackson. Baby’s favourite MJ song.”

“Truuuuue. Okay here try this one.”

“Okay this song is a lie. You absolutely do NOT beg for attention in small doses. You want to literally overdose on attention.”

“Um wow spilling the tea all over me. Rude.”

“It’s loverboy by you me at six.”

“Yes.” I said shortly putting on the next song.

“This is 100% loveshack.”

“Are you kidding? Are you actually dumb?”

“No come on this is definitely loveshack by the b-52’s.”

“It’s the B-52’s but it isn’t loveshack.” I said laughing really hard. “Holy shit I’m crying.”

“Okay then what song is it smarty pants?”

“Rock Lobster. It’s rock lobster.”

“Fake news.”

“You can’t just claim fake news on facts!” I said laughing harder.

“Rock lobsters are fake news.” I started hiccuping in my laughter and then he knew he messed up. “Oh shit she’s in a mood now. Should we stop filming until she calms down?” the crew shook their heads. William shrugged and turned back to me making me erupt into giggles again. After about 20 minutes of me annoying everyone on the set I finally got myself calmed down enough to continue.

“Um okay here’s the next one..” I said brushing tears out of my eyes. I pushed play and waited for Willy to guess it.

“Oooh that’s yeah by my man Usher.”

“Yup you got it.”

“I know my Usher.”

“I know you do hun.” I said with a small smile. “Here guess this one.”

“Oooooo it’s Brittany bitch! Toxic by Brittany Spears?”

“Yeah boi.” I said chuckling quietly. We went through quite a few more pretty quickly. William got a mix of right and wrong. “Okay last one Willy.”

“I’m so ready babe.”

“Saved the best for last.”

“Now I’m worried.” he said while I pushed play and bit my thumb with a big smile waiting for it. “Oh my god I hate you.” he said putting his head in his hands.

“Do you know it?”

“You’re a shit.” he said with a smile.

“Do you know it?”

“Yes I know it. Unfortunately.” I giggled a little bit. “It’s Mr. Flaming hot cheeto head. Lil Yachty. And by the complex words I’m going to guess it’s called Good day.”

“You’s right lemuuur!”

“Good now turn this off before everyone’s ears start bleeding.”

“Oh my god it happened one time William.” I said crossing my arms and standing up wakling over to him.

“One time too many.” he said pulling me to sit on one of his thighs.

“I stopped listening to it that loud and it never happened again. I already apologized to Kapi like 9 million times.”

“I know baby. I love you.”

“Love you.” I said putting my head on his shoulder.

“Okay guys this has been a lot of fun. I think (y/n) now knows that I do pay attention.”

“Like half attention.”

“Well how am I supposed to pay full attention to music when I want to pay full attention to you singing and dancing?”

“Oh my gooooood. William that’s so cute it’s gross.” I said giggling again.

“Okay well bye guys.”

“Bye thank you for having me.” I say smiling to the camera.

[blacknerdproblems]

*stares at screen like we're that one dude off The Office* WYD MARVEL, WYD!? #captainamerica #steverogers #NobodyAskedForThis

[chinarabutler]

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#LoveIt 😂😂😂😂😂 #PimpCTaughtMe Reposted from @callmechoko - Y'all Remember This Song ??💀 😂 #IWannaChopLays - - Video by @Callmechoko Ft @baffmasta & @cousindavid87 @lays Song (Chopping Blades) by @bunb (UGK) #Houston #NobodyAskedForThis #AbsolutelyNobody #Lays #Blades #Callmechoko #ChipOnMyShoulder #Layup #WrongLyrics #ItsAHoustonThang #Htown #RIPPIMPC #PimpC https://www.instagram.com/p/ByLcWvigCTm/?igshid=sb5ys4lfnyal

[ao3feed-ineffablehusbandz]

Tangled Omens

by SonyB89

a.k.a the Disney TANGLED / RAPUNZEL AU that nobody asked for.

Aziraphale has been living in a secret hidden tower in the forest for as long as he can remember. His brothers and sisters insist on hiding him, so nobody can use his magic powers for evil. They surround him with books, but the outside world calls out to him. He does not dare to leave his tower - until one day, a handsome red haired rogue climbs through his window...

Words: 1114, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: M/M

Characters: Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley (Good Omens), Gabriel (Good Omens), Michael (Good Omens), Uriel (Good Omens), Sandalphon (Good Omens), Anathema Device, Newton Pulsifer, The Them (Good Omens)

Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Grimm AU, Disney AU, AU, Nobodyaskedforthis, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Friends to Lovers, Aziraphale Loves Crowley (Good Omens), Crowley Loves Aziraphale (Good Omens)

source https://archiveofourown.org/works/23743243

[starynighty]

[hockeytrashgoblin]

Gender Reveal

“Baaaabe let me.” I whined at Auston trying to reach the swedish fish he was holding out of my reach.

“Ash no. How did you even sneak these out here?” I just shrugged at him to which he shook his head at me. “You know you have to watch your sugar levels.”

“Yes Auston I know. A little bit of candy isn’t going to kill me.” I had been diagnosed with gestational diabetes a little while before this and while Auston had been very freaked out with everything health wise for the past few weeks, this was worse. He barely let me eat anything sugary.

“I just don’t want anything bad to happen. You’re already going to be eating cake and stuff later and you already had tea. You always put too much sugar in your tea Ash, I just-”

“Auston I love you but I’m begging you. Shut up. And also how about you trust me? My mom has been taking care of me while you’ve been gone. The doctors say I’m healthy. I’m okay. We’re okay.” I said putting his hands on my belly.

“Alright I’m sorry. I’ll ease off.”

“No you won’t.” I say smiling at him.

“No I won’t.” he leans forward kissing me before he takes me by the hand to go talk to all the people crammed into our backyard for our gender reveal party. It had been Auston’s idea. I didn’t want to know but he really did so we compromised and so we know this one and the next will be a surprise. He really wanted to throw this party too while I would’ve been fine not forcing myself into a pretty dress and doing my hair and stuff. I didn’t even do my hair or makeup, I made Steph come do it. I just wanted Auston happy so I went with what he wanted. Once we made our rounds of people we sat down on our porch swing just so I could take a little breather before the big announcement.

“Are you excited Ashley?”

“Baby you know I am. This is all I’ve ever wanted. Since I was a little kid I’ve wanted to have kids with the man I love.”

“And you’re still sure that man is me?” he asked jokingly. I hit his arm making him laugh.

“Yes I’m sure that man is you.”

“Good.” we were silent again for a little bit until he spoke up again. “I meant are you excited about doing this? Like finding out and stuff..?”

“Well I had wanted it to be a surprise but I am excited to know. This party could’ve been in the house in our sweatpants-”

“Oh my god no it could not have been.”

“Oh come on why not?”

“You really want to do a gender reveal in sweatpants?”

“Well-”

“No don’t answer that. I know you, you would love to have done it in your sweatpants. Or should I say MY sweatpants since those are the only ones you wear now.”

“No fair mine don’t fit.” I say pouting at him.

“I know darling I’m sorry.” he kisses my head and wraps an arm around my shoulder.

“Are you excited for this big reveal?”

“Yes! I’ve been wanting to do this since I found out you were pregnant. I’m so excited to know.”

“That’s good baby I’m glad.” I smiled at him running my hand through his hair.

“Okay lovebirds you’re gross. Can we get this show on the road please?”

“Mitchy be nice, god.” Steph said rolling her eyes at her dumb boyfriend. “Seriously though are you guys ready? Everything is set up.”

“Yeah ready!” we stood up and walked back over to where everyone was gathering to get into their cars. We were doing the reveal on the ice at the Air Canada Center.

“Oh yeah way to go picking the most cliche hockey baby reveal ever.” Mitch said rolling his eyes.

“Boy that was not me.” I said rolling my eyes.

“Matts seriously?! You couldn’t get anymore creative?”

“I thought it was a cute way to do it..” he mumbled quietly blushing at the ground. I took his hand and whispered to him.

“Don’t listen to him Auston. It’s a very cute way to do it and I love it. I love you. Don’t second guess it now just because of Mitch.”

“You don’t think it’s too cliche?”

“Nope.” I gave him a kiss before climbing into the back of the car Mitch was driving. “And I’m glad we aren’t doing it here because I do not want to clean up all that powder and shit.”

“As if you’d even be cleaning it up.” Auston said getting in the other side.

“Well I would if SOMEBODY would let me do literally anything.”

“Excuse me for trying to make sure you aren’t putting stress on you and the baby.”

“Are you guys married? You sound married.” Mitch said from the front with a dorky laugh.

“Just drive Mitch.” Auston said rolling his eyes.

“Um wow ungrateful.” we were all relatively quiet on the way there. I was just too nervous to make small talk and I could tell Auston was too. When we got there Auston was very nervous.

“Hey what’s goin on up there?”

“I’m sorry I’m just really excited.” he couldn’t keep the smile off his face as we walked into the building. Everyone else was already there sat either behind the leafs bench or a few of his favourite guys were on it, like Mitch and Willy, both of our families. There was a carpet on the ice right near the door to the ice for me to step out on. Aus didn’t want me on the ice which was annoying but understandable. I went and stood on the carpet as he tied his skates and jumped over the boards. He skated over to get his stick from me and gave me a kiss before skating out to center ice to get the puck. It was being treated like an overtime goal situation. Freddie was in net. He was so happy Auston and I had asked him to do it I thought he was going to cry. He gave us both a big smile before putting his goalie mask over his face. Auston skated up to the net and shot the puck. When it went in and hit the back bar the net exploded with baby pink smoke. The goal buzzer went and the voice that calls the goals and the assists came on.

“Toronto goal, his most important of the season, scored by number 34, Auuuston Mattheeews. Assisted by Ashley Ladoucer. 25 and a half weeks, a baby girl.” he said as William flung himself over the boards and skated towards Auston at high speeds knocking him over. Mitch and Freddie were all over there too helping him up and giving him hugs. I was bawling my eyes out and I could see that Auston was crying too. He skated up to me and gave me the biggest hug I had ever received.

“A girl. We’re having a baby girl!” I cried happily laughing in his ear.

“Little baby Marly. You get your little Marly.”

“God Auston I’m so happy.” I was full on sobbing into his shoulder now. He put me down and we went around to hug everyone and share this great news. We had gotten it all on video by the hockey cameras so I was going to edit the footage together and post it later that night. The next day when I was watching the hockey game the intermission was all about the reveal and they interviewed Auston in between periods to ask him about everything. Don Cherry even wore a pink suit in honour of Marly and if I cried and took snapchats of it to spam Auston’s phone with no one needed to know.

[softmascs]

So attractive #nobodyaskedforthis #sorryaboutmyface

[hockeytrashgoblin]

Camping prt 2 (AustonxAshley)

“Wake up!! Mommy! Wake!Up!” I opened my eyes to find a little girl jumping on the bed in between me and Auston, who groaned but still wouldn’t open his eyes.

“What time is it Marzbar?” I ask her rubbing my eyes.

“Big hand is at 7. That means I can wake you up.” she says crossing her arms smiling at me.

“Yes sweetie you’re right. Go to the kitchen and I’ll be there in a minute and we can make breakfast together okay?”

“Okay!” she bounces down on the bed before running out of the room. I look over to find Auston sound asleep again so I decided to leave him be and went out to where Marly was waiting.

“What do you want to make for breakfast?”

“Pancake-cake!”

“Alright darling. What kind of yogurt do you want to put in them?”

“Uuuuuuum..” she taps her little finger against her lips and looks up as she thinks. “Peach!”

“Okay peach it is!” I got out all the ingredients and let her help me a bit with measuring and stirring. Nothing that could cause too much of a mess though. Halfway through mixing I got a phone call from Mitch.

“Hey Mitchy what’s up?”

“Hi Ash, is Auston awake yet?” “IS THAT UNCLE MITCH?” Marly and Mitch said at the same time.

“Yes it’s uncle Mitch baby. No he’s not awake yet. Sound asleep actually.”

“I want to say hi!”

“Mitch I’ve got a little girl here who is very excited and wants to say hi.”

“Well put her on what the fuck Ash, don’t hog me all to yourself.”

“Here you go sweetie.” I said giving Marly the phone. “Get away from the pancake batter though.”

“Hi Uncle Mitchy.”

“Hi little bean, how are you?”

“I’m good. We’re making pancake-cakes!”

“Oh wow lucky duck. I wish I was having that for breakfast.”

“Come over and eat them with us!”

“I donno Marly. Let me talk to mommy first.”

“Booooo.”

“Hey no boo. Give mommy back the phone for a minute.”

“Okay.” she handed me the phone.

“Mitch you can come over for breakfast if you want.”

“Well that’s good since I’m already in your driveway.”

“Mitch what the hell.”

“BAD WORD.”

“Sorry Marly. Just come up then Mitch. See you soon.”

“Bye.” I hung up and seconds later there was a knock on the door.

“Is that Uncle Mitch?!” she asked me her whole face lighting up.

“Yes honey.” she ran to the door I followed behind her. He opened the door and let himself in like he always does and picks Marly up, throwing her in the air.

“Hey Marly!”

“Uncle Mitchy!” she hugged him tight and he smiled big hugging her back.

“She’s been missing you since you went on vacation.” I told him smiling at the two.

“Well what a coincidence because I have been missing you like crazy little miss Marly.”

“Why don’t we take this reunion to the kitchen so I can cook our breakfast?”

“Yeah! I’m staaaaarving mommy.” she said dramatically putting her hand over her head.

“Uh oh. We’re losing her. She’s withering away to nothing! Dying for sure!” Mitch says with fake worry in his voice.

“Bleeeeh.” Marly puts her tongue out and flails her head back with her eyes closed.

“OH NO NOT MARLY!” Mitch lays her little body out on the floor and shakes her. “SHE WAS SO YOUNG! SHE HAD SO MUCH TO LIVE FOR!”

“Bleeeeeeeeh.” she says rolling her head to the other side.

“I know! Chest compressions! I’ll save her!”

“Mitch-” I tried to tell him to shut up but I was interupted.

“Ashley shut up I know what I’m doing! I’m a qualified professional!” I hear a little giggle from Marly but she still has her tongue out and eyes closed. Mitch starts to lightly push on her little chest. “Doc we’re losing her. WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!” He’s imitating either flatline or ambulance sirens. I couldn’t tell. Auston walked into the room rubbing his eyes. I hand him a cup of coffee and he stands beside me at the island looking on at the scene in front of us.

“So Mitch is home from Mexico.” he said in his sleepy morning voice.

“Yeah. I’m sorry he woke you. I tried to tell him to shut up but he wouldn’t.”

“Wow I’m shocked.” Auston said rolling his eyes.

“It’s like having two children.”

“Don’t even joke like that.”

“Two wouldn’t be nearly as bad.”

“Ash stop. We’ll talk about it some other time.” I could tell the conversation was done so I just rolled my eyes. “Flip your pancake.”

“Thank you.” I turned away from everyone and went back to the pancakes to hide the hurt on my face.

“SHE’S ALIVE ITS A MIRACLE!!” I hear Mitch yell. I look over to find him holding Marly up in the air while he’s laying on his back.

“Mitch be quiet please. It’s early.”

“Wow who knew daddy was a party pooper huh Marzbar.”

“Guys breakfast is ready anyway so please everyone sit at the table.” I was a little annoyed and Mitch and Auston picked up on it through my fake smile. Auston rolled his eyes and Mitch raised an eyebrow. I gave him an I’ll tell you later look and started eating asking Mitch how his trip was. Around 2 in the afternoon I realized we still hadn’t gone shopping yet.

“Auston do you want to come shopping with me and Mar?”

“Do I have to?” he asked whining at me with a puppy dog face.

“No that’s why I was asking, silly.” I added the silly in hopes to deter him from my earlier mood. It kind of worked. I leaned down and gave him a kiss to seal the deal. “We can go by ourselves.”

“Okay. I just really don’t want to go grocery shopping. Do you want me to maybe pack some stuff on your lists while you’re gone? Load some stuff into the car?”

“That would be lovely sweetheart. Thank you.” I went to Marly’s room to make sure she was dressed only to find Mitch trying to match together an outfit. “Mitch what are you doing?”

“Trying to find good clothes. It’s super hot out.”

“Top drawer genius. Unless she wants to wear a dress?” I ask looking at her.

“Yes! I want to be pretty!”

“Okay baby.” I smile at her and got her pretty white and gray striped t-shirt dress, her little sandals and a flower crown to keep her wavy hair out of her face.

“Wow look at you!”

“A little goddess, living the hippie dream.”

“Can I show Daddy before we leave?”

“Of course darling.”

“Where are you guys going?” Mitch asked following us out of the room.

“Grocery shopping. We’re going on a camping trip tomorrow.”

“Do you want a ride?”

“That would be helpful since Auston doesn’t want to go.”

“Yeah sure I’d be happy to help.”

“Thanks Mitch.”

“Daddy look at me!” Marly said kicking out her leg very dramatically.

“Wow who is the supermodel in my livingroom? Where did you come from miss USA?”

“I’m beautiful.” she said pushing her hair off her face.

“Yes Marly you sure are. The most beautiful girl in the world. Besides mommy of course.”

“Of course.” she said nodding. “Mommy is the prettiest lady in the world.”

“I agree. And you are so lucky cuz you look just like her.”

“Alright well we need to get going, come on Marly.” I say blushing like crazy while Auston smirks at me. “Bye Auston, love you.”

“Bye Daddy!”

“Bye babygirls, I love you. See you later.”

We left the house and got into Mitch’s car after transferring Marly’s car seat. The drive was relatively short but the actual shopping felt like it took 10 hours. Having one child running around grabbing things off of shelves is enough but when you have a grown man who acts like a child helping that child then it’s too much. The amount of junk food that was thrown in the cart and put back was astounding. It took us 4 hours to finally get everything we needed for the next day. When we got home I had such a bad headache it wasn’t even funny. I walked into the house with a napping Marly in my arms. I put her in her bed and then went back out to the kitchen to take some medicine.

“Hey baby how did shopping go?” Auston asked walking in. I went over and faceplant into his chest.

“Go help Mitch with the bags. Then make him leave.” I mumble quietly.

“Aww too much Mitchy for one day?”

“You have no fucking idea.”

“Go lay down Ash. I’ll go help Mitch and make sure he goes home. I’ll come in when I’m done and he’s gone.”

“Thank you.” I whisper before going to my bed and flopping down on it taking a bit of a nap. I wake up a little while later to see Auston laying beside me playing with my hair.

“Hi sleeping beauty.” he smiles at me.

“I’m sorry I fell asleep.”

“It’s okay.” he flips over so he’s laying between my legs with his arms trailing up and down my waist in a soothing manner. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m alright. Mitch is just a lot and I forget sometimes.”

“I always forget that you’re very introverted.”

“He’s just a lot. Like don’t get me wrong I love him but sometimes I just can’t. I feel awful for saying it but I just get drained when he is the way was today.”

“Don’t feel bad baby it’s okay. You don’t have to be able to deal with everyone always. We can get a little break tomorrow and a couple days after before you have to see him again.”

“We should pack up more. What time is it?”

“Almost 9.”

“Yeah we better pack the cooler and stuff.”

“Okay.” we walk into the kitchen and start packing all the food into two coolers, one for cold stuff and one for snacks. Once we finish packing all the food we sort out all our cooking utensils and plastic eating stuff into a separate bucket. While Marly was sound asleep I took Ingwaz and put him into her bag. Once I was absolutely sure everything was packed by the door or already in the car we went to bed ready for a very exciting time in the morning.

[hockeytrashgoblin]

Camping Prt 1 (AustonxAshley)

“Auston come on pleeease?” I asked him for the millionth time.

“Ashley stop. We’ve talked about this.”

“But it’ll be lots of fun.” he got up from the kitchen table and turned the water on to tune me out. I had been trying to convince him that we should take our 3 year old girl to Santa’s Village to camp. Auston was not having it unfortunately and didn’t want to go. “Auston come on give me one good reason why we can’t go.”

“What if we aren’t safe? What if someone sees me and comes into the tent?”

“Baby come on that won’t happen.” I said rolling my eyes.

“What about animals getting into our stuff?”

“They won’t.”

“Hun they might.”

“Auston. I know how to camp. I’ve been doing it since I was Marly’s age.”

“What’s your big thing with camping anyway? You want to sleep on the ground and have bugs everywhere? That’s fun for you?”

“Auston have you ever been camping?”

“No..” he answers shyly.

“Then how come you’re freaking out about this? It’ll be a first time for you and little Marzbar. Please can we go?”

“Uugh I guess. But I’m warning you now I’m going to be absolutely useless because I don’t know how to do anything.”

“Don’t worry baby I’ll show you. We’ll have a good time I promise.”

“Alright fine. Let’s do it. If it’ll make you happy then we’ll do it.” he said putting his arms around your waist smiling at you.

“YAY!!” I exclaimed putting my arms around his neck and kissing him. “Thank you, thank you, thank you babe!! You won’t regret this I promise.”

I went to the desk and got out a pad of paper and a pen to start writing a list of stuff we were going to need. Auston went out to go pick up Marly from Ema’s where she had gone for a sleepover with Abuela while she was in town. I kept writing out lists of things to pack and buy and food ideas until I had things spread out all over the table. I heard the door open and looked up.

“Remember to take your shoes off first sweetpea.” I heard Auston say laughing at our daughter’s excitement.

“I wanna go see mommy.” I could hear the pout in her sweet little voice and small grunts as she took them off before running towards the kitchen.

“Marly be careful!” he yelled after her.

“Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!” she yelled jumping up into my arms.

“Hi babygirl.” I gave her a big hug. “Did you have fun with Abuela?”

“Uh huh! Look what she gave me!” she said excitedly putting her arm up showing me a colourful beaded bracelet.

“Oh wow. Very pretty.”

“She made it just for you didn’t she princess?” Auston said finally coming back to the kitchen.

“Yeah! And she got me a new book! Can we read it tonight mommy? Please?”

“Of course we can. That was very nice of her. Did you say thank you?”

“Yes I did.”

“Okay good. Abuela is going to spoil you rotten.”

“Nuh uh.” she said shaking her head laughing, little dimples popping out.

“Speaking of spoiling you rotten, we have a surprise for you Marly.”

“Ooooh what is it?!” she said turning back and forth from me to Auston.

“Well sweetpea your mom convinced me and we’re going to go camping at Santa’s Village soon.”

“Camping?! Like mommy?”

“Yeah pumpkin, just like mommy.” he said smiling at her.

“It’ll be a lot of fun Marzbar. We’ll do all the fun camping stuff but at the same time we get to go and have fun with Santa and his elves.”

“We’re gonna see Santa in summertime?!”

“Yeah we are! This is where he goes in the summer. We get to see his reindeer too! Even feed them!”

“I want to feed the reindeer!!”

“You can hun. You can do almost whatever you want there.”

“I want to feed the reindeer and meet santa too can I?” Auston asked.

“Daddy you’ve been bad you can’t come.”

“What? Why?” he asked shocked but grinning.

“You made me take my shoes off.” she said crossing her arms. We both kind of lost it at that and started laughing.

“I’m sorry darling. Truly I am. Can I please come?”

“I guess so.” she said with an exasperated sigh. “But only because we need a ride.”

“Okay deal. Why don’t you go play while we make some lunch?”

“Mommy can I play the piano?”

“Sure can baby. Go ahead.” I put her down and she runs out of the kitchen and soon I heard little piano keys being pushed by gentle fingers.

“Man oh man is she ever like you.” Auston said smiling.

“What do you mean?”

“She’s got me wrapped around her little finger.” he gave me a kiss and then looked at all the paper on the table. “What’s all this?”

“Stuff we’re going to need to get for camping.”

“Y/N why so much stuff?”

“Trust me Aus. This is all need to have stuff. Now. After lunch I think we should go to Canadian Tire and get the stuff.”

“When are you planning on us going?” Austin asked putting some hot dogs in a frying pan.

“I donno, we aren’t busy right now so I thought maybe leave on Friday?”

“That’s only two days away! Are you sure we’ll have everything ready?”

“Yeah of course babe. We just need to go grocery shopping, to canadian tire for supplies, and pack. We can definitely do that in two days. Today we’ll go gear shopping and pack. Tomorrow we can go grocery shopping and the next morning we leave.”

“Okay if you’re sure, book it.” he said putting the hotdogs and toast on a plate bringing it to the table.

“I already did.”

“Of course you did.” Auston said laughing and kissing your forehead. “Marly time for lunch!”

“I’m coming!” I heard her little feet running on the floor before she slides into the kitchen almost falling but Auston caught her.

“Marly what did I tell you about sliding?”

“To not to.”

“Then why did you?”

“Mommy did it.”

“Mommy did it you say?” Auston looked up at me and I looked at the ceiling covering my smile with my hand. “Well mommy is dangerous. Here I made you some hot dogs. Eat up because after you’re done we’re going to go shopping for camping stuff.”

“How many sleeps til we go Daddy?”

“Two more sleeps, babygirl.”

“I’m veeeeeeery excited.” She said leaning over and smiling big.

“I’m glad Marly. I’m very excited too.” I tell her brushing her hair out of her face.

Shortly after she was done eating we were in the car on the way to the store. Once we got there I lead the way back into the camping section.

“You know where everything is a little too easily.”

“Okay so I come back here everytime I’m here so what.”

“You little cutie.” he kissed my head. “So what do we need first?”

“A tent for sure. What size do we want?”

“You’re asking me? What do I know?”

“Okay Auston how much stuff are you bringing? Do you want a big air mattress? Are we sleeping on the ground? What about Marly is she sleeping with us? On her own mattress? The ground?”

“I want my own bed mommy.” she said from the cart.

“Okay baby we can do that. So, Auston what kind of thing do you want to sleep on? I think we could make a double work but if you want to go bigger let me know now.”

“Double will work I think.”

“Okay. One double, one single, and one battery operated pump. In the cart. Now let’s get a 5 man tent I think.”

“Why 5?”

“So we can fit and fit our stuff and still have some room to move. Trust me baby. Tents are comfortable for half the amount it says they can hold.” once we pick out a tent we go and get a cooler, hot dog pokers, bread toaster, bug spray, sunscreen, aloe vera gel, lots of batteries, solar phone chargers, matches, fire starting cubes, flashlights and lanterns.

“Why do we need three lanterns? That seems like too many. One should be enough.”

“One is enough until someone takes it to go to the bathroom, Marly takes it to go to bed, or one stops working for some reason and we’re left in the dark. Auston trust me, please.”

“I do trust you this just seems like a lot of stuff for a one time thing.”

“Oh hun. This is not a one time thing I promise you that. You’ll love this, I know it.”

“Yeah well we’ll see I guess.” we checked out and went to the mall to get bigger bags, beach towels, bug catching kit, other various toys for Marly to play with and a bathing suit for her.

“Do you want to go out for dinner babe?” Auston asked me quietly.

“Yeah sure. Where do you wanna go?”

“I was thinking something simple.”

“Consider this.” Marly said reaching from her middle seat clapping her hands together once really loud like I constantly do. “Mcdonalds.”

“Good god she really is your kid.” Auston said laughing. “Okay Marzbar we can get some mcdonalds.”

“YAY!!”

“But me and you have to pack when we get home deal?” I asked her looking back at her pouting face. “Deal?”

“Deal..” she mumbled. We went into the restaurant and got Marly some french fries and a toy. She ate gluten free and Auston allowed me to make that choice. We didn’t know if she was celiac or not but we didn’t want to test it and have our daughter almost die because she got the disease from me. We all ate, talking about camping and how much fun Santa’s village will be and my memories of the park. We let Marly play in the play place for a while as we finished eating. Once we were all done we went back home and I brought Marly to her room to pack in her new bag.

“It’s a hockey bag like daddy.”

“Yes it is pumpkin. You’re very own first hockey bag. Now how about we break it in and pack some stuff in it?”

“Okay! Can I bring Ingwaz?” Ingwaz was her little bear that uncle Brad got her when she was born. He named it ingwaz after the first film we made.

“Of course baby. We’ll pack that up when we leave though okay? So that you can sleep with him until we go.”

“Good idea Mommy.”

“Okay. What pajamas do you want?”

“I want my onesie! The wolf one! And daddy’s!”

“Okay sure. What about sweaters?”

“Can I bring the orange one you made me?”

“Of course. How about a couple hoodies too?”

“Yeah!”

“Alright now we needs pants, socks, underwear, bathing suit.” I said to her as she nodded with a serious look on her face. Once I put all that stuff in I remembered something else. “Oh I have a present for you!”

“For me?” she said smiling big as I dug around through her closet to the back getting out a box.

“Yes! I got these a little while ago when I started asking daddy to let us go camping. Open the box Marly.” I sat on the bed with her while she opened the box and took the protective paper out of it. “What do you think?” I asked slowly smiling at her.

“Are these boots like Mommy’s?”

“Yes darling. I got some hiking boots special just for you! Do you wanna see if they fit?”

“Yesyesyes!!” she giggled and kicked her legs out so I could put them on and do them up for her.

“Wow look at you! Fancy lady!”

“Thank you mommy! I love them lots!” she gave me a big hug and I felt so happy.

“Alright well. It’s getting late. Do you wanna read that book from Abuela before bed?”

“Yes please. Can I have a braid first?”

“Of course. Let me go get the brush and ponytail while you get into jammies okay?”

“Okay.” when I got back she was under her covers in pajamas. She sat up so I could brush and braid her hair. “I want wavy hair tomorrow.”

“Well with this braid you will Marly. You’ll be the prettiest little girl in the world.”

“You sure are right.” I giggle at her for once again blatantly copying my talking.

“Alright well let’s read darlin.” after a while of me reading to her she went to sleep. I kissed her forehead and left the room going to the livingroom finding Auston.

“Is she asleep?” he asked once he heard me come in the room.

“Yup. Out like a light.” I plop down on his lap making his phone fall. “Hi.”

“Hi lovely.” he said smiling putting his hand on your hip holding you in place. “How are you?”

“I’m good. I’m really excited.”

“I know I can tell.”

“Auston..are you really not excited for this at all..?”

“Baby I don’t know. Camping has just never really been my idea of a good time.”

“But you’ve never been. Let us change your mind. Look how excited Marly is.”

“Even more excited after you gave her that little present.” he said smirking.

“You were there for that?”

“I happened to be walking past and I heard you guys.”

“I know I got them for her a little while ago. I got you some too.”

“You did?” he asked in surprise.

“Yeah they’re in the back of our closet with mine.”

“You knew I’d cave huh?”

“Yeah.”

“How?”

“My dad caved to my mom. You’re way less of a party pooper than dad ever was.”

“You’re lucky I love you.” he said nuzzling his face into my neck while I played with his hair.

“I know I am. I love you too.”

“That’s good.”

“Are you tired already Aus?”

“Maybe a little. We’ve had a busy day.”

“This is true. Do you wanna go to bed?”

“Yeah.” we go to our room and pass out for the night exchanging I love yous quietly.