#nobody can stop my madness
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#nobody can stop my madness#it was just to easy to make these#the bad batch#tbb spoilers#the bad batch season 3#tbb memes#text post#tbb rampart#edmon rampart#admiral rampart#zirkonias edits
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controversial take here but i really hope hetty is on her absolute worst nastygirl/comedic clown behavior in s4 to push back against the poor little meow meow woobification curse shes been experiencing since holes because i am tired
#i almost wish hiles never happened because nobody understands her character anymore lol#few things worse than when your blorbo becomes the character everyone self inserts themselves onto 💔#whenever i get too mad i remind myself that rebecca wisocky views her exactly the same way i do and then i feel better :)#watching an incredibly nuanced female character get flattened out intonthe tragic one who killed herself makes me wanna scream#bc nobody even understands WHY she killed herself and i am ripping my hair out#z#ppl r allowed to interpret the character different from me but i am allowed to think they’re wrong <3#oh no i wrote this at 6am thinking nobody would see it LMAO this is just a personal gripe#obviously people can do whatever they want and i will not stop you or directly argue#play with your dolls however you want and dont let me being a bitch stop you#i just am allowed to be grumpy about it similtaneously 😂
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i think this would fix him
#it's so funny bc i'm asexual and rarely have ever had the urge to draw anything even slightly suggestive#but THIS MAN.#i dunno. he flipped a switch in my brain.#i realized that as an artist i can just. put him in situations.#and nobody can stop me#i'm going mad with power.#postal#postal dude#postal 1#suggestive#i guess
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ive been unhealthily fixated on kubosai for the past few weeks, i just have no idea how to put it into words. kuboyasu aren and saiki kusuo are in love btw
#they are.#been thinking a lot about t*rusai and k*bosai and all three of them together#(really long rant in these tags that shouldve been a rant post but im not changing it soz i got carried away LMAO->)#see the thing is that k*bosai is my absolute favorite ship ever. but i get genuinely pissed when people smack talk t*rusai#idk like i get why people wouldnt ship kbs and i really dont care. and i also get that a lot of people have differing opinions and-#wont ship trsai. i honestly cant wrap my head around why (other than people who just hate teruhashi and are misogynistic) but im okay with-#agreeing to disagree and i dont care yk??#but people so often make these long discussion posts just yapping and yapping and making up shit about how trsa 'wouldnt work'#and its always just... actual complete bullshit. like unreadable word vomit.#sorry. but its true.#thats why it gets me so mad#i cant think of a single reason why you would feel the need to do that#why cant you be normal and just. not like a ship. just dont like it. hate it even. but dont make up shit just to shit on it#its so dumb i have to force myself to just scroll past them every time i encounter one#usually on tiktok or tumblr#if i read them i wont be able to stop myself from making the most concerned and upset noises ever cuz what is actually wrong with you#theyre always the biggest dumbest stretches ever and they ignore their actual development and pretend it didnt happen#it just makes me wonder why people are so okay with making fun of that ship but get mad if anyone even dislikes theirs#and then they complain about people 'shitting on their opinion'#LIKE ?? NOBODY CARES THAT U HATE THE SHIP. I CERTAINLY DONT GAF.#but ur in the main tags advertising ur hatred for it and sounding stupid as shit for no reason? UR SHITTING ON PEOPLES SHIP ON PURPOSE#AND THEN GETTING MAD AT ANYONE WHO EVEN SAYS 'i disagree actually' IM LAUGHING SO HARD STOP IM KILLING MYSELF#the one time i ever talked in that much detail about why i disliked a ship was bevause somebody specifically asked me#and yk what ?? i have literally gotten death threats over it. im not allowed to hate that ship but everyone else can do whatever i guess#okay sorry. rant over.#is that controversial i cant tell. i dont really care and im not tagging anyway#meows post
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STATUS UPDATES:
➯ FICSFORGAZA [!]
I am currently dealing with a family emergency and my ma has been rushed into hospital so I’ll be offline until things calms down, and progress on wips will slow considerably. I’m really sorry guys
➯ GOING INTO 2024
2023 has been rough for me in all manner of ways but I will say it has been very fruitful with regards to my writing. I managed surpass my goal of 100k words, reaching an unfathomable 150k at present, and I’ve even managed to hit a big milestone when it comes to my following! I’m extremely grateful to all my readers, both those that have stuck with me and those who are new, and I wish I had adequate words to really express that. but going into 2024 I will likely be writing less frequently than I did this year. this is due to my own health, and a multitude of other problems that I can no longer keep on the back burner.
plenty of you have seen mentions of hospital visits and procedures on my blog, and while I’m not very comfortable oversharing about medical stuff I do want to be transparent about the fact that I will be posting fics less because of it. I’ve been in and out of semi hiatus for the better part of 4 months but I was always awful at sticking to it. next year I want to actually give myself grace, and take care of my body.
please do not fear!!! this resolution actually aligns perfectly with my writing goals for 2024. I want to focus on lengthening my word counts. I’d love to post fewer fics, but to have said fics be 25 to 50k respectively, rather than to post a lot of 1 to 15k fics. mostly I want to work on my own impatience when it comes to writing, and berate myself less for what I think I should be doing writing-wise. I will still be around on here, and I always want to talk with you guys (and read whenever the mood strikes!!), the biggest difference is I’ll have longer projects, and you’ll have to wait for them (though if I’m honest I will likely still post a shorter fic here and there lol).
I appreciate the patience a lot of you have already shown me this year, what with my random breaks and gaps between posting. you have all been so so kind and generous with your praise and I wouldn’t be here, writing and sharing, without that support. I love you all and wish you well going into the new year!!!!!
#prev tags from original post ->#if you’ve sent me an ask I’m sorry I haven’t answered yet#I am very bad at taking breaks like idk how to chill so here’s hoping this helps LMAO#how many reminders can I fit in my tags#remember to drink water and take your medication and eat when you’re hungry#remember to open your curtains and let air into your space and go outside sometimes if u can#remember to take breaks from ur screen and roll your wrists! especially if you work at a desk#stop sucking in your stomach it’s bad for you and your stomach is hot anyway why lie#remember your friends love you and keep you around bc they love you and not bc of what you do for them#nobody is mad at you and I’m happy you’re here#ok that’s all the ones off the top of my head#I’m the creature on ur shoulder whispering all this to you
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i wanna post my skip to loafer art but i cant do it knowing ppl are gonna put it on tiktok and pinterest bc itd be like. bringing an invasive species ykwim
#my meds just kicked in so im feeling talkative but truly idk how to explain it#its like. with anything else id be more than happy to introduce it to ppl like monkie kid and mp100. witch hat maybe but its personal to me#but skip to loafer is special to me. and i feel bad for saying this bc other ppl do deserve to watch smth they will enjoy#hell the reason i got into it was bc my friend was kind enough to lend me her copy and i got hooked#its so ironic im saying this esp given how insecure i am abt depicting characters wrong. but i really dont want to look thru the tags#and see them on a 'can i copy your homework' tier list. or ppl getting mad abt why egashira mitsumi and shima cant just be a throuple#its just!! i wont stop you if thats how you like to engage with the show or how you interpret it bc ill just ignore it and leave u alone!!#and theres no objective wrong way of doing it!! and i know that interacting with the work is what forms a community after all!!#but keeping it tight knit is just easier for me bc nobody has to worry abt making each other laugh and we can enjoy it for what it is#fully aware im saying this as someone whos drawn monkie kid art with text post memes and owl house draw the squad templates#but at the same time i just. dont want to explain myself or give ppl reasons why shima and mitsumi are ace coded just bc it 'feels right'#fandom is a communal thing and it feels so hypocritical thinking this. too many conflictng thoughts that idk what to act on#yapping
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Saw a YT vid with the title, "Fandom Can't Handle Asexuality"
You're right, they can't... Because it doesn't fucking exist to them.
#aroace#asexual#enby people arent real either#we're told to stop using neopronouns and to stop being aroace bc 'nobody will take LGBT seriously'#keep being exclusionary#i dont want to be your friend if you're gonna act like that#I'm a genderqueer aroace person who's pronouns are it/its and you're gonna fucking respect that or be called a bigot#this shit has got to stop#also... because it matters#dont be ableist#ever. just dont#one of the main reasons i hate Alastor so much... is the fandom's treatment of him as a character#most of them completely erase his sexuality in favor of shitty crack ships.#I think a QPR with Lucifer or Rosie is a cute idea! but that's it#keep Vox pining for Alastor... that's great too#its like when I tried to erase Porter Gage's Bisexuality.... It was wrong and I've changed (Fallout 4's romanceable companions are cannonic#cannonically bisexual... I don't make the rules) I was just mad because someone had MY BLORBO in a disgusting ship and I got sick of seeing#it... And THEN I learned how to block tags!!!#idk where this is going#i'm just upset that aros and aces and enbys are erased#maybe it's a confirmation bias and i've just spent too long doing demographic research#i HATE demographic research#it takes me to disgusting places#i need to find my sewing patterns so I can refocus my energy into something good
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Hot take, but I'm happy Bruce gave Batman to Jean-Paul during Knightfall instead of Dick.
Why? Well, Bruce is physically and mentally in an awful state. If Dick had seen him like this, no way he would have listen to the "don't approach Bane" order (he never does), and he could have got badly hurt!
And, yeah, Jean-Paul didn't listen either but, as much as I like him, I care less about his ass getting beaten by Bane than Dick, and he also wore a fucking huge armor.
Anyway, Bruce was not made aware by Tim how badly Jean-Paul was doing as Batman or he would have give it to Dick AND ALSO, he immediately said to Tim he didn't want to call Dick because he knows Dick would hate to be Batman. Like, he preferred to give Gotham to someone he barely trust than to make his boy do something he would hate, he is trying!
#bruce wayne#batman#dick grayson#jean paul valley#dc comics#my ramblings#Can someone make Tim stop lying pls#he is just a teen lying his way through life and no there's a bloody batman nobody to help him stop him#Dick was so mad to learn that Bruce got his back broken by Bane from Barbara#but like he would have seen Bruce he would have been heartbroken at his state
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my birthday is in 8 days and i am n nnotttt feeling it . at all.
#i work the day before and day aftwr so i cant really go anywhere#i have nobody to invite if i could👍 turning 21 going to bed at 7pm and not drinking with no friends im like the ultimate loser#😁#i was planning to finish my meet the artist before my bday so i can make like a yearly thing with it#but i havent been able to sit down and color anything in forever#art has been so shit lately. i just sit down and scribble and then get mad and stop#playing sdv like an addict for a week and then completely dropped it#reading random manga i found in my closet (love hina)#i really am like . not feeling it#im off center#i want a new tat but i got dentist bills next month#and i really need a new car. i think mines about to explode#and I really need to go on testosterone#but i cant even go to the doctor for my migranes#so how am i gonna ask for hormones#everything is baby steps away but im too scared to even try#i couldve been on hrt since i graduated#i couldve been trying to get into schools#i couldve . fuck idk? actually learned guitar by now? instead of dropping it and letting it rot in my closet#I've been on fucking autopilot since 9th grade#last tkme i had friends.
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How to disable likes on post so only reblogs
#sorry for being so straigjt forward with this but like. either reblog art or ignore it#like. likes dont do anything for the algorithm and it just sits in the post's notes. it gets nobody to see the art#“i dont want my followers to be annoyed” who cares! its your blog#go crazy! no one cares what you post! if they do then they can stop following you#if they get mad they werent a good fit to be your follower in the first place#please reblog art.#if you dont youre basically saying that this art isnt good enough to have other people see#this site isnt like twitter or tik tok or whatever#reblogs keeps it ALIVE#the reblog button was the original like button#please. reblog art#not dp related
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#I understand everything sucks but what am I supposed to do about it#I’m seventeen I’m doing everything I can and NOBODY FUCKING LISTENS TO ME#I know everyone in the universe has it worse than I do so I’m not allowed to be mad or tired about anything#And I know I’m in the wrong for everything ever but can we all just stop shoving it in my face 24/7#There isn’t a single choice I can make that won’t hurt people and if anything bad happens it’ll be all my fault#I don’t wanna live in this world anymore.
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getting anxious and sad after hanging out with friends like come on man. i thought we got over this already ive got shit to do
#avpswjy#nobody did anything wrong ofc i just get this way#i always fear that im just kind of There and deeply forgettable#ppl care abt me but would they notice if i was gone? idk#and because i just kind of have difficulty making friends by default its hard to tell if im overreacting or not lmao#i know im standoffish!! im sorry!! i dont mean to be#i try to be friendly but social interaction takes a lot out of me :(#idk man i dont want to seem like im mad at anyone or tht anyone did smth wrong i just dont know how to stop having this kind of anxiety lol#tbhhh i think ive just been going thru it a bit bc ive been missing long distance friends :')#i wish i could live closer to friends#i think. the holidays coming up is making it a problem too bc i dont have enough time off to visit anyone :(#i can spend time w my brother n his family but only if my mother doesnt try to show up#and i dont want to be alone#anyway. its whatever. ive just been feeling lonely lately
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Is this anything
#mmmmmmm yeah this is a main blog post#nia you’ve made this joke like 50 times already can you stop it maybe?#okay we get it the pretty noblewoman starts losing it after finding out her husband cheats on her. move on#the answer is no :) I will keep hammering in this comparison until I am physically forced to stop#and by physically I mean the fact I’m probably playing with fire by posting Summiya with half her tit out for like the third time#oh well. it’s been okay so far so let’s hope it will continue being so#aaaaanyway#I was absolutely not thinking of Hatice when I came up with Summiya and drew this piece but the vibes are there and comparison checks out#and I am absolutely not complaining because this means I get to spread some turkish soap opera fungus to my beloved partner in crime#hi Kat :)#Hatice may not be my favourite character. far from it in fact. it’s hard being a Nigar stan in this world 😔#as well as a firm believer that the show lied and that Nigar lived the rest of her life out in Sulina with her Esmanur#but tbh denying deaths happening at the end of season 3 in a mediocre early 2010s show is kinda my modus operandi at this point#who’s surprised? no one. absolutely nobody#….I got off topic again#ANYWAY don’t come @ me for Hatice’s death date I got like 3 different results when I looked it up#and went with the one that appeared in more than one source#also I’m not a historian I’m simply a lover of harem dramas and beautiful princesses with disorders#and comparing them to my vast network of avatarverse OCs#I realise this post is completely incomprehensible to everyone but Kat and me. but when has that ever stopped me before?#target audience of one and I like it that way#anyway I should probs quit my deranged ramblings and go eat something#ask me who Hatice sultan is I dare you#the legend of korra#original character#Summiya#Kat and Nia and their multiverse of madness#magnificent century#muhteşem yüzyıl#hatice sultan
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siiiiiiigh
#i am in fact a grown adult who is still incapable of talking about their feelings and thoughts to people so I'll just rant here#my relationship with my mother is. so weird. it's not always bad but it always ends up bad for one reason or another#she can be perfectly civil and i'll still be irritated. other times i do try to tolerate it and engage and she ends up saying something#upsetting to me either way.#i don't want to keep being rude to her i don't want to get mad and annoyed all the time but i just can't stop. it's always like this#and i hate myself for it and i hate her and i hate everything about it#today i was leaving for work and she was like. i'll take the trash out of your room and i told her not to do it. she kept insisting and i#had to raise my voice at her to maybe get the point across to get her not to touch anything#and yes my room is a fucking mess and it is something to be embarrassed of. i just feel so fucking tired all time time and i keep tellin#myself that i will clean it this time for sure and then i don't. most of the time it's my mother taking care of it without my permission#and i am grateful for it bc nobody likes living in a mess... but i also fucking hate it because it makes me feel even more worthless#i just can't get rid of the feeling of shame. no matter what i do.#and back to the mother thing. i told her that if she touches anything i will go to her room and throw out anything that isn't nailed down#even though objectively i have no reason to oppose her helping me#but i also fucking hate it#maybe being rude is the only way to get it across. but also i get irritated about anything so easily#i feel shittier and shittier every day. had there been an easy and painless way of killing myself i would have done it already#and despite how much i want to blame this on a disorder or lack of access to medication. there is no magic pill that would fix me is there#i'm just a shitty person who cannot get it together despite everything being handed to me#i'm literally bad at anything and everything. i'm not even a good blogger lmao#people have it much worse in life and still do better. me? i'm useless. there's no helping it. i should have died from covid or something#nobody will save me. nobody cares enough. besides one person whom i push away because i can't stand her and i don't even know why 👍#if i stop messaging people first most of them would forget about me#i am alone. a lonely person in a messy room desperately trying to be entertaining so someone will pay a little bit of attention to me.#not to mention the geopolitics#i won't even go there. i hate the possibility that people might see it mentioned and give me shit for it#one more thing that is apparently my fault. directly or indirectly#all i want is to leave this country. spend the day with someone who cares for me like an actual friend. and then shoot myself so i don't#have to go back#sealene.txt
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No, I'm not okay. Thanks for not asking.
#once again I am useless to everyone unless I'm a vessel for their stress#my own doesn't count and doesn't matter#and when you all use me up and leave me a husk you wonder why I'm not moving when you ask me for help#has anyone asked me recently if I'm okay? pshht#I'm the Support Person I'm always okay I never need anything#and if I do it's my fault for not supporting enough#ah well que cera cera#this is just who I am#I'm a vessel and nothing else#I've never been anything else and never will be#nobody gives a shit about me except in terms of what I can do for them news at 11#did you mean: my entire life thus far?#I'm sick of it#I'm sick of screaming and pleading for help into the cold uncaring void and getting 'so? I have my own problems#leave me alone if you're not going to help me'#fine. i'll leave you alone#I'll stop asking#I'll stop offering#I'll see how long it takes anyone to notice#they won't notice they never do#or rather they will as soon as I can't be the support person anymore#and then they'll get mad at me for not supporting them because I'm not an autonomous person#I'm an on call therapist#with no problems of my own#how dare I pretend to be anything else#I want one (1) person to ask me if I'm okay without having to be prompted to give a shit about my wellbeing#one person. once.#but it's always started with 'oh how are your parents'#'how's your sister'#everyone asks me if everyone BUT me is okay
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if you send me shit like this i’m stealing something out of your house. and then killing you
#like actually what the fuck are you thinking sending me stuff like that. ON ANON ?!?!?!?#Boy i don’t know you. who are you#i don’t care if this is lighthearted or in good fun or whatever. if you’re not my mutual and/or friend you DON’T get to joke about#stuff like this. Like seriously what the fuck is going through your head to think that’s an okay thing to send to an artist you don’t know#i don’t even know what to say. Either get your head out of your ass and stop complaining or start paying me#like you Do understand i’m doing all of this shit for free right. because i want to. and that means i can literally take as fucking long as#i want. nobody is paying me to Work dude. ughh i’m so mad but i should probably stop rambling in the tags#my point is if you send me shit like this i’m 1) killing you 2) blocking you. because you don’t get to enjoy my art and/or my comics#not after an ask like that#crammerposting
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