#noah x toast

[darkenokami]

reference sheet time!

First we have redesigns of Noah and Toast, who is also known as Mateo (for my “Search For Sanctum” story)!

Second we have a redesign of Arkosios, my fursona!

Lastly, we have a uh….ship child I suppose? for Noah and Toast (Nicolai will also be featured in my story as well but when Noah and Toast are older).

[lovisyandereblog]

Eyes on Me

Yandere Submissive Stalker X GN Reader

Part 3! Probably last part….maybe

Part 1 and 2 here. Also guys Im so sorry for my mistakes in my last post! I accidentally used she/her pronouns in my writing, I genuinely didn’t even realise it. Im so sorry guys!!

7 weeks. It had been 7 long fucking weeks and you were still stuck here.

Noah had kept you captive for nearly two months now, but he never let you feel like you were one.

He would gift you things you wanted nearly everyday, Noah would cook your favourite dishes for you, he would shower you with love and affection, always making sure your every want and need was met.

All he asked for in return was your love…thats all he wanted.

And it seemed like you were slowly giving in.

What else could you do?! He was so adorable, so cute, so kind, so sweet…you were slowly becoming more lenient towards him.

For example, you weren’t kicking, hitting or screaming anymore. You were eating your food rather than throwing it away and yelling. And you were a bit more welcoming to his kisses, his soft and loving kisses.

Noah was also letting you roam free in his large house. You had an idea of who he was now. Noah was a very famous doctor, and was very wealthy. He was a psychiatrist who always treated his patients with care and love, never making them feel like they were a burden.

But although he let you roam the house freely, he never let you outside.

Creak…

The door opened and you stared at it, the same sweet smile you saw everyday greeting you.

“Good morning my love~!! Have you had a nice nights sleep?” Noah came closer to you, stroking your cheek and kissing your forehead. You were so used to it at this point that you didn’t even bat your eye at his affection.

“ `Morning…” You mumbled as you rubbed the sleep out of your eyes, sitting up slowly.

“Have I ever told you how beautiful you look in the mornings~?” Noah said in a sing-song voice, twirling a piece of your y/c hair with his finger.

You tried to hide your blush as you turned your head away, “W-whatever…”

Noah chuckled and kissed your cheek again, “Come! Go get freshened up and lets have breakfast! I’ve asked the cook to make you your favourite french toast!”

He looked at you expectantly, waiting for you to praise him. He practically lived for your praise and attention, but you would rarely give it to him.

“Oh..thank you Noah..Ill go get ready…” You murmured as you rushed to the toilet. Noah watched you go, hearts practically engrained in his eyes. For you. Just for you~

At the breakfast table, Noah was staring at you lovingly as he fed you the toast.

“I can feed myself…” You tried to protest, but he whined.

“P-please! Please let me Y/N…Im begging you~” His eyes were so cute, you just couldn’t help but give into his pleads.

“Fine..just stop looking at me like that…” You replied hastily, and he immediately brightened up and went straight back to feeding you.

After your 5th or 6th bite, you started feeling quite full, putting your hand up to stop the bite in Noah’s hand to come near your mouth. He nodded and ate the bite himself, smiling at you with such a lovesick grin.

You swallow nervously, looking at him. You had to ask him a question really badly, it was really important, “Noah?”

“Yes my angel, my love, my darling~?” Noah answered, hearts in his eyes as he looks at you. You had to keep yourself from smiling at his cheesy terms of endearment.

“Can you please let me go outside? I haven’t seen the outside world in like 2 months…” You complained, making him frown immediately and look away.

“Y-Y/N, you know how sorry I am…I feel so guilty baby…” Tears already filled his eyes as he spoke, making you sigh as you always gave into his tears.

“But…but I can’t let you go…Im scared you’re going to leave me. I can’t live without you my love…I’ll die!” Noah started to cry, holding your hands and bringing it to his heart. On the inside, he knew he was manipulating you but what else could he do?! He genuinely did love you so so much.

He loved you to the point of obsession.

You thought to yourself as you just stared at him, he sniffed and gave you puppy eyes. You knew you had to do something in order to get out of this place, otherwise he’d just keep you locked up forever. You wanted your life back and you knew just how to do it.

It involved giving into Noah’s love in order to regain your freedom. There was no other way. You had tried to escape in the past but he always…always found you.

“Noah…if I become your..partner..will you let me have more freedom?” You asked, and he immediately jumped up, looking at you hopefully.

“Y-Y/N?! Are….are you being serious?!” Noah couldn’t believe it, all his hard work finally paid off. You would finally be all his.

“Yes Noah, I’ve thought about it a lot and I want to start a relationship with you, but you have to promise you’ll let me go-” You had barely finished your sentence when he suddenly fainted, making you let out a loud scream.

You immediately went on your knees, cradling him in your lap as you tried to nudge him awake.

‘What the fuck??’ You thought to yourself as you check his pulse and sighed in relief when it’s normal.

“Now what am I to do with you…” You mumble to yourself before a plan comes to mind.

Paybacks a bitch…

Noah woke up with a groan, his eyes slowly opening yet his sight was still hazy.

‘What happened…?’ He thought to himself as he tried to sit up, but his eyes widened when he couldn’t move. He looked up and saw his wrists were tied together and attached to the headboard of the bed. To add to this, his ankles were tied to the bottom poles of the bed. He looked down and noticed he was now wearing only his boxers and a t-shirt.

He thrashed around, trying to get out of his restraints to no avail. This couldn’t be happening. Where the hell were you?!

Noah began to sob and panic as millions of thoughts raced through his poor little head. He started to think of how you had left him and he’d never see you again.

“Y/N!! P-PLE-HIC-PLEASEE I’M S-SORRY…DON’T L-LEAVE ME…I’LL DIE W-HIC-WITHOUT YOU!!!” He was genuinely going crazy without you, where did you go?? Why would you leave him? Was he not good enough?! He’d change for you—he will; just give him a chance!!

“Y/N!! C-COME BA—” His words were cut off by you suddenly placing a hand over his mouth, “Shut the fuck up,” You seethed, glaring at him as he looked up at you with teary blue eyes.

Where you came from, he didn’t know but he was just happy that you were here. Although he was genuinely scared from how angry you looked, he couldn’t help but feel relieved at the fact that you hadn’t left. He was so delusional that he thought you had came back for him❤️❤️❤️ (A/N he’s so weird I love him)

But he also had a little problem because of you on top of him; all of his fantasies were coming true. Oh god just ruin him already!!

He whined against your hand and tried to buck his hips up, making you grip onto his mouth even harder, “I said shut up you fucking brat, can’t listen to simple instructions?”

The mix of your strong body on top of him and your cruel words made the poor boy’s eyes roll to the back of his head as his back arched; pathetic moans leaving him.

No way….did he just….?

You look down and saw a wet patch forming on his crotch, you internally smirked at how much of an effect you had on him but you had to keep up your strict persona, “Did you just fucking cum, you slut?”

Noah panicked, his pretty eyes filling with even more tears as he shakes his head “no,” worried that you’d be disgusted with him. (He secretly wanted you to treat him like trash)

But could you blame him for cumming?? You were literally on top of him looking as beautiful as ever, whispering demeaning words at him and you expected him not to cum?

“Mmm…n-not a s-slut…” He tried to mumble against your hand, looking at you with such love in his eyes. You nearly felt bad for him.

You suddenly slap him on the face, making him whine out in pain and pleasure as he breathed heavily from the release of his mouth from your hand. You took a second to admire the sight below you:

His blonde locks were messy, bangs sticking to his forehead. His cheeks were all rosy and wet with tears as was his mouth which was covered in his drool. Noah’s big blue eyes were looking to the side, embarrassed to face you as he bit his pretty pink lips.

You gripped his hair roughly, making him whine out, “Did I say you could talk back? Did I say you could fucking look away?”

He shook his head frantically, mentally face palming himself for disobeying you, “N-no! No…‘mm sorry!! S-sorry…please…”

“Sorry’s not going to cut it pretty boy…I think I need to teach you a lesson hmm? For all the bad things you did…” You leaned in close to his ear and he could feel his dick harden again from your proximity, “….for kidnapping me, keeping me locked up here…you’ve been a bad boy haven’t you~?”

Noah had started to sob, tears cascading down his adorable pink cheeks; he didn’t want to be a bad boy!! He wanted to be good, so good, for you!

“N-no! Mm so-sorry!! I’m n-not a bad boy! I-I’m a g-good boy…your good boy!!” He desperately begged, looking up at you in hopes you’d believe him. He knew what he had done was wrong but his intentions were never bad, he promises!!

You couldn’t help the heat pooling in your lower stomach from the way he was begging, god his desperation was so hot. So what if he was a deranged, psychotic, obsessive lunatic? He was cute!!

“But you haven’t proven to me you’re a good boy…so a punishment is really needed~” You said with a devilish smirk forming on your face, making both his heartbeats race (if you get what I mean💀💀)

You lean over and open one of the drawers, an assortment of items you had bought while he had been unconscious. His eyes widened in fear and excitement as he saw you bring a ball gag to his mouth, “Mmnnoo!! Y-Y/N!!” He tried to beg but you had already sealed his mouth shut.

Then you proceeded to pick up a remote like device you bought, Noah looked at it in confusion while tilting his head. You smirked at how adorable he looked, he didn’t know what he had gotten himself into.

With the click of a button, Noah’s back arched as he felt pleasure coursing through his body. He hadn’t even realised that a vibrator was lodged inside him! You must have put it in while he was unconscious.

“MMMNNGGH~!” He moaned against the gag, his body twisting and shaking, poor little baby was so sensitive!

You turned the vibrator off and he slumped down, his chest heaving, “Now for your punishment, I’m going to leave you here with that vibrator on and you’re going to cum over and over again until I’m satisfied, do you understand?”

Noah’s eyes widened and he shook his head profusely. This wasn’t what he wanted, he wanted to feel you, to touch you, to have you make him feel good; not this stupid toy!

He also didn’t want to be alone, he felt like he’d die if you weren’t near him so he began to cry, “N-noooo!! Mmm stayy!” His voice came out muffle which only made you smirk even more.

It was evident you were a sadist; seeing him whine and beg like that really turned you on. However you were doing this also to make sure it was engrained in his head who was in charge: you. It was to make sure he’d never pull a stunt like this again and would also prove his obedience to you.

“You said you wanted to be my good boy didn’t you Noah~? So be a good boy and take it.” You said sternly, turning the vibrator on once more before walking out of the room, leaving the door open a little bit so you’d hear him.

His moans and cries followed you as he begged for you to come back, but with the gag in his mouth he could only do so much.

Noah’s eyes rolled to the back of his head as he came again with a cry, his boxers were now dirty with his jizz. He sobbed as the vibrations bullied his poor prostrate, he wanted you to make it feel better, please come back!

And then he came for the third time, and the fourth and then the fifth. It felt like hours had gone by (it had only been 30 minutes) since you left him in this state; his whole body was shaking as his hips bucked to try and get away from the vibrations but to no avail.

“Nnnngghh~!! ‘S t-too m-much…too much!” He whined, mainly to himself but it came out as mixed garbles.

You finally graced him with your presence and entered the room, your own arousal building up at the sight of him. But you also felt pity on him, it was clear that he had never felt the touch of anyone his entire life—let alone come numerous amounts of times!

He hadn’t noticed you came in yet, his mind was all foggy and hazy; the only thing he could focus on was the vibrations in his ass.

You say next to him and his head immediately darted towards you, tears pooled his eyes and he begged you to make it stop, “P-pleasshh~” He tried to say but the gag and the tormenting toy stopped him from being able to vocalise himself.

You cooed at him and turned the vibrations to the lowest level, yet not quite turning it off yet, “Have you learnt your lesson~?” You ask, and he nods eagerly and tries to get closer to you: to feel your comfort, your warmth, your affection, your love~

You take mercy on him and take out the gag since it was clearly hurting his jaw, he lets out a moan of relief as incoherent ‘thank yous’ and ‘I love yous’ leave his mouth.

“Shhh…it’s okay, I’ve got you~” You whisper in his ear, you gently take his underwear off and take the vibrator out, making him whine, “Mmmh…s-sensitive..ahhnngh~”

He gave you such adorable eyes, pleading for you to make him feel better so you cupped his face, “Don’t worry, I’ll take all the pain away, I promise…you’re my good boy right~?”

As soon as he heard the words, “Good boy,” he immediately nodded like a mad-man, “Mmm your good boy! P-please…please…y-yours…”

You could tell he was extremely exhausted from the torment you put him through, so you untied his wrists and ankles which made him cling onto you like a spider monkey; you let out a soft chuckle, “Noah…you have to let me go…I need to clean you up…”

“N-no! D-don’t go…please…” Tears pooled his eyes yet again, making you coo at him which he melted to.

“Shhh…alright, we can cuddle for a bit but then I have to clean you okay~?” You wrapped your arms around his waist aswell, being careful not to touch his very sensitive lower body.

Noah could still feel the tingles and electricity coursing through his body, but once you held him in your arms—he felt all that pain go away. He snuggled further into you, his face buried in your neck.

“I love you so much…I love you Y/N..” He mumbled against your skin, kissing it softly.

And you found yourself saying something you’d never imagine saying the first day you met him;

“I love you too Noah~”

Ahhhh! Finally finished this!!

—>my masterlist <3

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mdni banner used from @cafekitsune !!

[misspygmypie]

Meet & Greet... and more? Pt. 11

Pairing: Lando Norris x reader Words: 2904 Click here for Part 10

Please do not repost, thank you, and leave some feedback :)

The day of Lando and Y/N’s wedding was everything they had hoped for: simple, intimate and filled with the people they loved most. The ceremony took place at a picturesque estate surrounded by gardens with a gentle breeze.

Lando stood at the altar, his best man, Max, stood beside him, a wide grin on his face as he gave Lando an encouraging pat on the back. The McLaren team was there, along with many of the F1 drivers, all gathered to celebrate this special day with their friend.

Y/N walked down the aisle and Lando’s breath caught in his throat. She looked breathtaking in her simple, elegant gown, her eyes locked on his as she made her way toward him. Noah was the ring bearer and he walked proudly ahead of her, holding the pillow with the rings carefully in his small hands.

The ceremony was beautiful, filled with heartfelt vows and promises of love and support. When they exchanged rings there wasn’t a dry eye in the house. Noah stood close by, beaming with pride at his parents.

As dinner came to an end Max stood up to give his toast. He spoke about how he had seen Lando grow, both as a person and a driver and how meeting Y/N had only made him better. He joked about how he never thought he’d see the day when Lando would settle down but that Y/N had changed everything. When it was Y/N’s turn she stood with a glass in her hand. The room grew quiet as everyone waited for her to speak.

“I want to thank you all for being here with us today,” she began, her voice filled with emotion. “It means the world to us to have our family and friends here to celebrate our love. Lando and I have been on an incredible journey together and today is just the beginning of a new chapter.”

She paused, looking at Lando with a loving smile. “And as some of you might have noticed, I’m not drinking champagne tonight. That’s because…” She looked at Lando, her eyes shining with excitement.

Lando grinned, unable to hold back. “That’s because we’re expecting,” he announced, his voice full of pride and happiness.

There was a moment of stunned silence before the room erupted into cheers and applause. The drivers let out a few loud whoops and the McLaren team exchanged excited looks and pats on the back. Max stared at Lando and Y/N in shock before his face broke into a huge grin.

“I knew you two were up to something,” Max laughed, shaking his head in disbelief. “Congratulations, mate! That’s amazing news!”

Noah, who had been sitting at the table with his grandparents, beamed excitedly. He had known about the baby for a while and was thrilled that everyone else finally knew too. He jumped up from his seat and ran over to Lando and Y/N, hugging them tightly.

“I’m going to love the baby so much,” Noah declared proudly, looking up at his parents with bright eyes.

Y/N knelt down to hug him back, tears of joy in her eyes. “We know you will, Noah. You’re going to be an amazing big brother.”

The rest of the evening was filled with laughter, congratulations and well wishes. The drivers joked about what the baby’s first words would be - something car-related, they all agreed - and the McLaren team started placing bets on when Lando would have the little one behind the wheel of a go-kart.

Lando and Y/N took to the dance floor for their first dance as husband and wife. They swayed to the music, holding each other close, their hearts full of love and anticipation for the future. Their family was growing and so was their happiness. It was the perfect beginning to their new life together.

When the applause and cheers subsided Y/N and Lando were surrounded by friends and family eager to offer their congratulations. Max was the first to reach them, his face still lit up with shock and excitement.

“Lando, mate, you’ve been holding out on me,” Max exclaimed, pulling Lando into a tight hug. “I knew something was different, but this… this is incredible!” He pulled back, looking between Lando and Y/N with a grin. “So, when did you guys find out? You’ve been keeping this secret for how long?”

“We found out a few weeks ago,” Lando laughed, a little sheepishly, “but we wanted to wait for the right moment to tell everyone and today seemed like the perfect time.”

Max shook his head in amazement. “Well, you definitely know how to drop a bombshell! I’m just glad I didn’t say anything too wild in my speech.” He turned to Y/N, his tone softening. “Seriously, congratulations, Y/N. You’ve made this guy the happiest I’ve ever seen him. And now, with a baby on the way… it’s just perfect.”

Y/N smiled warmly, hugging Max. “Thank you, Max. We’re so happy you’re here to share this with us.”

As Max stepped aside, Cisca and Adam Norris approached, their faces glowing with pride and joy. Cisca was the first to speak, her voice trembling slightly with emotion.

“Oh, this is such wonderful news,” Cisca said, embracing Y/N tightly. “I’m so happy for both of you. Another grandchild! And on your wedding day, what a perfect gift.”

Adam nodded, a proud smile on his face as he pulled Lando into a hug. “You’ve done well, son. You’ve found yourself a wonderful partner and now you’re starting a family. We couldn’t be more thrilled for you both.”

“Thanks, Dad. Thanks, Mum. It means a lot to have your support.”

Cisca turned to Noah, who had been standing proudly beside his parents. She crouched down to his level, her eyes sparkling. “And you, Noah! You’re going to be a big brother! How do you feel about that?”

Noah grinned from ear to ear. “I’m so excited, Grandma! I’m going to teach the baby everything I know.”

“I’m sure you will, darling. You’re going to be a wonderful big brother,” Cisca laughed, pulling Noah into a warm hug. 

Adam ruffled Noah’s hair softly and grinned. “You’ll have to show them how to drive, too. Maybe we’ll have another racing prodigy in the family!”

As the family shared in the moment, Oscar made his way over, his usual calm demeanor replaced with a look of genuine excitement. “Wow, Lando, Y/N, congratulations! This is amazing news,” Oscar said, shaking Lando’s hand and then giving Y/N a gentle hug. “I had no idea you guys were expecting. You really kept this one under wraps!”

Y/N laughed. “It wasn’t easy, especially with all the race weekends and the cameras everywhere but we managed!”

“Well, I’m really happy for you both. And Noah, you’re going to be the coolest big brother ever.”

Noah puffed out his chest with pride. “I know, right?”

The group shared a laugh before Oscar continued, “You know, Lando, you’re going to have to start thinking about baby names now. And don’t even think about naming them after a racing circuit.”

Lando chuckled, exchanging a playful look with Y/N. “No Zandvoort or Monaco, then? What about Imola?”

“Absolutely not!” Y/N almost shouted but smirking. “We’ll pick something a little more traditional, I think.”

_______

Lando, Y/N, and Noah were sitting together in their living room, the excitement of the baby’s impending arrival filling the air. Max was with them, sensing something special was about to happen but not entirely sure what.

“Max,” Lando started, “we’ve been meaning to talk to you about something really important.”

Noah, nearly bursting with excitement, handed Max a small, wrapped box. “Here, Uncle Max! Open it!”

Max, curious and motivated by Noah’s enthusiasm, took the box and carefully unwrapped it. Inside, he found a small, elegant frame with an ultrasound photo. Written underneath the photo were the words, “My name is Maebry. Will you be my godfather?”

Max’s expression softened immediately. He read the words, his eyes lingering on the name, and then he looked up at Lando and Y/N, visibly moved. “Maebry… That’s such a beautiful name,” he said, his voice thick with emotion. “And you want me to be her godfather?”

“We can’t think of anyone better, Max. You’ve always been there for us and we know you’ll be there for her too.”

“You’re family to us, Max,” Lando, feeling the weight of the moment, added. “We know you’ll be an amazing godfather, someone Maebry can look up to and rely on. It would mean the world to us.”

Max swallowed hard, trying to hold back tears. He looked down at the frame again, his fingers tracing the words. “I… I don’t even know what to say. I’m so honored that you’d ask me. Maebry’s not even here yet and I already feel like she’s going to change my life.”

Noah, sensing Max’s emotion, quickly climbed up onto the couch next to him and let his tiny arms wrap themselves around his neck. “We love you, Uncle Max. Maebry’s going to love you too.”

“I love you guys too. And I promise, I’ll be the best godfather I can be. I’ll always be there for her, for all of you.”

Lando, also feeling emotional, reached over and placed a hand on Max’s shoulder. “Thank you, mate. This means so much to us.”

Max finally let the tears fall. He had never felt so overwhelmed but happy before. “Thank you for trusting me with this. I can’t wait to meet Maebry and be a part of her life.”

______

The day had finally arrived and the anticipation was palpable. Y/N had been feeling contractions throughout the night but as dawn broke they became more intense and frequent. Lando was at her side, doing his best to remain calm but his nerves were getting the better of him. His fingers fidgeted, his foot tapped anxiously and every time Y/N winced, he felt a surge of worry.

“You’re doing great, love,” Lando whispered, though his voice betrayed his own anxiety. He brushed a stray hair from her face and squeezed her hand, trying to be her rock even as his own emotions threatened to overwhelm him.

Y/N smiled weakly, sensing his nerves. “We’ve got this, Lando. Everything’s going to be fine.”

He nodded, but the knot in his stomach didn’t ease. Lando had been through countless high-pressure situations on the track but this was different. This was their child, their family and the weight of that responsibility was unlike anything he had ever experienced.

Meanwhile, Noah was back at home with his grandparents, Cisca and Adam. They were doing their best to keep him entertained but nothing could fully distract him from the excitement bubbling up inside him. He had been talking about becoming a big brother for months and now that the moment was here, he could hardly sit still.

“Is she here yet? Is Maebry here?” Noah asked for the umpteenth time, his eyes wide with anticipation.

“Not yet, sweetheart,” Cisca said gently, ruffling his hair. “But it won’t be long now. How about we draw a picture for her while we wait?”

Noah nodded eagerly, grabbing his crayons and paper. As he worked on his drawing his mind raced with thoughts of what it would be like to have a little sister. He imagined all the things he would teach her, all the games they would play and how he would protect her no matter what.

Back at the hospital, the hours seemed to stretch on endlessly. Lando did his best to keep Y/N comfortable, fetching ice chips, adjusting pillows, and holding her hand through every contraction. But beneath it all, he was a bundle of nerves, worried about everything going perfectly.

As Y/N’s contractions grew closer together the medical team prepared for delivery. Lando stood by her side, his heart pounding in his chest. He could see the strain on her face and it made him feel helpless. He wanted to take her pain away, to make it easier for her but all he could do was be there.

Then, after what felt like an eternity, the room was filled with the first cries of their newborn daughter, Maebry.

“She’s here,” Lando choked out, tears welling up in his eyes. The nurse placed Maebry on Y/N’s chest and Lando leaned down to kiss her forehead, overwhelmed with love and relief.

Y/N’s face softened as she looked down at Maebry, tears streaming down her cheeks. “She’s perfect,” she whispered, brushing her finger along Maebry’s tiny hand.

Lando nodded, unable to find his voice. He simply watched in awe as Y/N held their daughter, the magnitude of the moment hitting him like a tidal wave. This was his family, his life and it was more beautiful than he ever could have imagined. Y/N gently handed Maebry over to Lando. He took a deep breath, his heart pounding.

Lando looked down at Maebry, who was nestled snugly in the soft hospital blanket. Her tiny face, with its delicate features, was now in his arms. His fingers trembled slightly as he adjusted his hold, ensuring she was secure and comfortable. The weight of her small, fragile body was so different from the confident, adventurous Noah he had met when he was already four years old. The experience of holding his own child was new, a feeling he hadn’t fully anticipated.

He studied her intently, his eyes tracing the curve of her tiny nose and the delicate flutter of her lashes. She had the same dark hair as him and could see soft, tiny curls already forming on her head. Maebry’s warmth seeped into him, a sensation so intimate and different from anything he had ever felt before. The love he felt for her was immediate and overwhelming, an intense bond that seemed to envelop him.

Lando glanced over at Y/N, who watched with a soft smile, her eyes filled with pride and happiness. “She’s so tiny,” he whispered, almost as if speaking to himself. “I never imagined it would feel like this.”

Y/N nodded, her eyes glistening. “She’s perfect, isn’t she?”

Lando’s gaze returned to Maebry, his heart swelling with emotion. “Yeah, she is.”

As he gently rocked her in his arms he thought back to when he first met Noah. He remembered the excitement and uncertainty of becoming a father figure for the first time. Holding Noah and being there for him had been a life-changing experience but this was different. This was his daughter, a new chapter in their lives. The love he felt for Maebry was profound but it didn’t diminish the love he had for Noah. In fact, it only added to it.

Meanwhile, Cisca and Adam were preparing to bring Noah to the hospital. When they finally told him the news his eyes lit up with pure excitement. “Is she really here? Can I meet her now?”

“Yes, she’s here,” Adam said with a smile, taking Noah’s hand. “And she’s waiting to meet her big brother.”

When they arrived at the hospital Noah practically buzzed, his little feet moving quickly as he walked with his grandparents. He couldn’t wait to see his baby sister, to hold her and tell her all the things he had been saving up to share.

When they reached Y/N’s room, Lando looked up and smiled, his face still flushed with emotion. “Hey, buddy,” he said, waving Noah over. “Come meet your little sister.”

Noah’s breath caught as he approached the bed. His eyes grew wide as he took in the sight of Maebry nestled in Y/N’s arms. For a moment, he simply stood there, his mouth slightly open in awe.

“She’s so tiny,” Noah finally exclaimed, inching closer to get a better look.

Y/N smiled, her heart swelling as she watched the wonder in Noah’s eyes. “She is. And she’s so lucky to have you as her big brother.”

Cisca and Adam watched from the doorway, pride evident on their faces as they witnessed the first moments between their grandchildren. Lando gently lifted Noah onto the bed so he could get a better view of the baby.

“Hi, Maebry,” Noah whispered, his voice filled with awe. “I’m your big brother. I’m going to take care of you, okay?” 

He reached out cautiously, his little hand gently brushing against Maebry’s tiny fingers. She stirred slightly, her eyes fluttering open for just a moment.

“She’s looking at me,” Noah gasped, his excitement bubbling over.

Y/N smiled, feeling tears of joy prick her eyes. “She knows who you are, Noah. She knows you’re her big brother.”

In that moment, Lando felt his nerves finally settle, replaced by an overwhelming sense of peace. Their family was complete and the love that filled the room was more than he could have ever hoped for.

When they all gathered around Maebry, Lando looked at Y/N, his eyes filled with nothing but devotion. “We did it,” he whispered, his voice choking with emotion.

Y/N nodded, resting her head against his shoulder. “We did and it’s perfect.”

Noah leaned in closer, his eyes never leaving his sister. “Welcome to the family, Maebry,” he whispered, his voice full of love.

______

Stay tuned for the last one, Part 12!

Tag: @barcelonaloverf1life @remmysthings @poppyflower-22 @vickykazuya @hadids-world @ririyulife @deafeningunknowntyrant @lexiecampos @littlegrapejuice @eloriis @yawn-zi @landossainz @taliya8346282844eliviahdgdajs @casuallyeating @jaydensluv @destinyg237 @il0vereadingstuff @lnchicagosreads @alana4610 @hc-dutch @cherry-piee @wisestarfishbouquet

[roosterforme]

The Younger Kind Part 44 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: Bradley swallows his pride and seeks out a conversation with Admiral Simpson, but he's surprised by the response he gets. You keep everyone on their toes, and you do it so effortlessly, Bradley knows it's time to go shopping. And he uses Skittles as the perfect cover.

Warnings: Swearing, angst, fluff, smut, and age gap (18+)

Length: 4000 words

Pairing: Single dad!Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x babysitter!female reader

Check out my masterlist for more! The Younger Kind masterlist.

When Bradley parked at work a little early on Monday, he sat in the Bronco for a few extra minutes. He had just witnessed you and Noah making breakfast together, and it was making it really hard to be away from you right now. When he walked into the kitchen, you were brewing coffee and singing the dinosaur song with his son while the two of you spread that weird avocado stuff that you liked so much on some toast. He had started to love it, too, and Noah would eat anything you made. 

He removed his aviators and pinched the bridge of his nose. There was so much he wanted to get done this week, including looking at a few engagement rings, but he knew better than to make any sort of excuses to get some time alone. That had nearly backfired on him when he went to get Skittles. He was going to have to get creative somehow.

When he pulled out his phone to call the animal shelter about getting Skittles' cast removed, he froze. Across the parking lot, Nat and Javy were both getting out of his car. "Interesting," he muttered to himself as he watched his best friend groping their coworker, and he grimaced. He'd already seen too much. 

"Hello, this is the San Diego shelter. How can I help you?"

Bradley nearly dropped his phone; he'd forgotten he was making the call. "Yeah, hi. I need to schedule an appointment to have my dog's cast removed?"

"Oh! Are you talking about the Yorkie?"

He smiled as he climbed out onto the already hot pavement. "Yeah. Skittles. I'm hoping she has sufficiently healed."

"Why don't you stop in on Wednesday and we can check her out."

"Sounds good, thanks," he replied, following Nat and Javy at a very conservative distance. But apparently he wasn't cautious enough. 

"So," Nat sighed once Bradley joined her in the hangar, "you saw Javy and I in the parking lot." It wasn't a question, so he decided to just nod and roll his eyes in response. "Oh, come on, Rooster. I'm just having some fun."

"Look at him," Bradley muttered, glancing to where the man in question was smiling at Nat. "Are you serious right now? You want to make him cry or something?"

Now she was the one rolling her eyes. "I'm not taking advice from you. You're historically terrible at dating."

"I'm doing a pretty good job now," he said, smiling as he thought about you.

"You can't even get Cyclone off your girl."

Bradley covered his face with one big palm. "You noticed that?"

Nat laughed. "Everyone at the botanic gardens on Saturday night noticed that."

"Fuck," he groaned. "If she wasn't so young and so fucking hot, I wouldn't be about to embarrass myself by trying to get him to let me fly in the air show."

She just shook her head as she reached for her helmet and muttered, "Oh, cry me a river."

"Hey." Bradley turned just in time to see Javy greeting the two of them like a puppy looking for Nat's attention. He was honestly worse than Skittles at the moment. "The guys are talking about a beach day this weekend. You know, since the summer is ending."

"We don't need to do another beach day. We live in San Diego," Nat replied as she sipped the coffee she wasn't supposed to have inside the hangar. "It's the same season all year round."

Javy laughed like she was a comedian, and Bradley looked back and forth between the two of them, completely baffled by this dynamic. There's no way you and he made a couple this wild. 

"Yeah, but it's still the end of August," Javy said, now smiling at Nat as if she was the most adorable thing in the world. "Rooster, you can bring your girl and your kid. It'll be fun."

"You know what," he replied, "I think I'll go if Nat goes."

Then Bradley strolled away as they started arguing, because he saw Admiral Simpson on his way to the tower. He just needed to get Cyclone alone for a few minutes, swallow his pride, and try to head Jake off for the air show. The opportunity arose after lunch when Bradley caught him checking his phone outside the rec room door.

"Admiral Simpson, sir," he greeted before grinding his back teeth while he thought about you. "May I have a word?"

Cyclone glanced up before pocketing his phone, a look of vague amusement on his face. "Lieutenant. What can I do for you?"

"It's about the upcoming air show. Sir. I was hoping you could tell me if you'd made selections regarding who would be flying in it."

His look of amusement grew. "I have not. I believe that was on my agenda for today or tomorrow." He paused before adding, "I've been meaning to thank you for that glass of bourbon on Saturday night. Woodford Reserve is one of my favorites."

Bradley remained unflinching. Although he had no idea what Admiral Simpson was talking about, he thought it better to simply agree with him. "Yes. The Woodford Reserve." 

He nearly took a step backwards when the other man started laughing. "You'll have to thank your girlfriend for me, too. And I'm assuming the reason you're here is because you want to fly in the air show?"

"Yes...sir," Bradley replied slowly, feeling very off balance now that Cyclone was being so agreeable. 

Still chuckling, he said, "I'll see what I can do," before turning and walking away. 

Once he was out of earshot, Bradley pushed through the door to the rec room as he muttered, "What the fuck was that?"

-----------------------------

It was almost fun for you to pick Noah up from daycare now. Not that you would ever admit that out loud. But the enjoyment you found in the way Casey pouted at you was a bit of a guilty pleasure, and besides, you got to have Noah greet you like you were the most exciting and interesting person in the world.

"Mommy!" he called out as he ran across the lobby and into your arms. "Guess what my craft is!"

"A dinosaur?" you asked as you shot an extremely fake smile at Casey before heading outside.

"Nope."

"A... dog? Did you make Skittles?" you asked as you put him in your car.

"Nope."

"The solar system?"

"Nope."

"Hmm. Will you give me a hint?" you asked, brushing his soft curls away from his forehead and giving him a kiss. But he was already unzipping his bag and pulling out his newest painting. There was a big, light blue shape that looked like it could have been Bradley's Bronco along with a man who appeared to be sporting a mustache. "Is that Daddy?"

"Yes!"

Then you noticed a little brown blob. "Is that Skittles?"

"Yes! She's his best friend!"

You laughed, because Noah wasn't wrong. Skittles seemed to love Bradley the most, and as much as he tried to fight it, the dog won him over. "She is," you agreed before buckling him in. "She's his best friend besides Aunt Natasha."

Noah shook his head. "She doesn't count, because she's an Aunt."

"Right, right," you said, not wanting to fight his childhood logic when Skittles wasn't even a human. "You're completely right. Should we go home?"

You started singing the dinosaur song as you drove, and because of a detour, you had to drive past the park where Meredith had chased you down. A shiver rippled through your body as you remembered falling and scraping up your arm in your haste to get Noah safely in your car. You hated coming home this way. There was a reason you never did it.

"Mommy, why did you stop singing?"

You glanced in the mirror at Noah's face. "Sorry! Where were we? The part about how the dinosaur stomp, stomp, stomps?"

Bradley was already home when you pulled into the driveway, and you found him dozed off on the couch with Skittles curled up on his chest. Two seconds later, he was jolting awake with the dog in his hand as Noah ran for him. "Daddy! I made you! Out of paint!"

"Cool," Bradley told him, pulling Noah onto his broad chest as well. "And how's Mommy?" he asked, his voice a little raspier just for you. "How was your day, Princess?"

You shook off the last remaining thoughts of Casey and Meredith as you leaned down to kiss him. "Pretty good." He chased your lips for more, but his arms were too full of Noah and Skittles for him to be able to reach for you. "Looks like you're still tired from the weekend," you said with a wink.

"I had a nice conversation with Cyclone today." 

"Oh? About what?" you asked as you started to head to the kitchen to make dinner. 

His expression remained completely neutral as he told you, "Bourbon. Woodford Reserve, to be specific." When you said nothing, he added, "We can chat about it later."

So you made spaghetti, knowing you'd been found out. You had been tipsy on Saturday night at the retirement party, but you were pretty sure you remembered what you did. Probably. You hoped Bradley wasn't mad at you over it, but he seemed to be in a good mood as he ate dinner and offered to give Noah a bath while you walked Skittles. 

She was stubborn for you at first, plopping down on the front porch and whimpering for Bradley while you tugged gently on her leash. "Come on. You're making me look bad! You were my idea. Mine and Noah's." When she remained in her spot, you had to reach into your pocket and say, "Treat?" That did the trick, and you got her to take a slow lap around the block with you while you broke a milkbone into little bites and gave it to her. 

When you returned home, Skittles bounded into the house to get to Bradley where he was sitting on the bathroom floor, looking comically enormous with Noah's rubber duck in his hand. You stood in the doorway and watched him automatically reach down to pet the little pup, taking caution with her casted leg while he rinsed the shampoo out of Noah's hair. 

"You want to go to the beach this weekend, Bub?" he asked softly. "With Aunt Natasha?"

"Can Skittles come?" Noah asked, and you watched Bradley place a soft kiss on his wet forehead that left you reeling. Suddenly you couldn't wait for Noah to be in bed so you could have him all to yourself. 

"Maybe. If she gets her cast off on Wednesday," he replied softly as the dog fully plopped down with her head on his thigh. 

"Daddy?" you asked from your spot in the doorway. It was almost a whine, and when he looked up at you, you were certain he knew what you were thinking about by the little smirk on his lips.

He reached into the tub to drain the water as he asked, "Do you need some attention?"

You just nodded, still in your scrubs from work, but you felt too warm now as you pressed your thighs together. "Yes."

"Fifteen minutes, and then you can have it," he replied with an edge to his voice. "Can you wait that long?"

"I can try," you murmured before you turned to go into Noah's room and get his dinosaur pajamas ready. Anything to expedite bedtime. You listened while Bradley took his time reading three stories, and then you kissed Noah's forehead before you tried to pull Bradley toward the hallway.

He chuckled and whispered, "I'll meet you on the couch."

"Oooh, the couch," you said before running from the room. Before you could even decide what you wanted to do, Bradley was behind you wrapping his arms around your waist and tickling your neck with his mustache.

"I kind of miss those nights when I would help you study."

You moaned softly. "Anatomy really is your specialty."

You felt him pull his right hand away from your body, but before you could complain, it reappeared in front of you with a bag of Skittles on his palm. When you spun in his arms and kissed him, you whispered, "You're so sweet."

Bradley lifted you up and took you the few steps to the couch where you settled in straddling his lap while you opened your candy. "If you're this excited about something I picked up at the gas station, I wonder what you'll do if I buy you something a little more expensive."

You met his soft eyes and leaned in to kiss him. "How much more expensive are we talking?" you asked, treating him to the orange Skittle you pulled out of the bag. He parted his lips and you slipped it between them, watching his jaw work as he chewed it up. 

"A lot more expensive," he replied as you ate three candies. "Hey, this is a 50/50 relationship here, Princess."

You shoved a small handful into his mouth and kissed his cheeks as he sputtered and chewed. "I'll share everything I have with you. Too bad I don't have much."

Bradley swallowed down the treat and reached for your free hand. "You give me everything I need. Everything I want, too."

You basked in the warmth of his words as your eyes closed, and a welcome heat crept into your cheeks. "I love you."

"Then I think you'll love what I'm planning on buying for you," he whispered as his mustache grazed your chin and jaw. 

You grinned, hoping you already knew what he was talking about, but too afraid to say it out loud. So you pushed the thought from your mind and scooted a little closer toward him on his lap. "What's this I'm hearing about a beach day? And Skittles getting her cast off? This is all news to me."

He didn't miss a beat as he wrapped his big hands around your hips and said, "What's this I'm hearing about some bourbon at the retirement party? It's all news to me."

"Oh," you whispered softly before eating more Skittles, buying yourself a little time to think. "Well, you see... I wasn't exactly sober."

"You're joking," he deadpanned. 

You rolled your eyes and shoved more candy into his mouth. "I may have had a glass of bourbon sent over to Admiral Simpson, courtesy of Lieutenant Bradshaw and his girlfriend..."

After a few quiet blinks, Bradley's head tipped back in laughter so loud that Skittles the pup came running into the room. "You didn't!" Bradley said. "I have to work with that man!" 

"Somebody had to make the big move, Daddy! It cleared the tension!"

He met your eyes, still shaking his head and smirking. "It also made you look like Daddy's good little girl."

Your heart skipped around in your chest at his words, and you set your candy aside in favor of wrapping your arms around his neck. "Am I not? Daddy's good little girl?"

"Oh, you absolutely are," he replied as he lifted your top inch by inch. "I just never thought my boss's boss would see it that way." 

You raised your hands up in the air, eager to lose your shirt, but he took his sweet time about it. "Daddy."

"You can be patient," he whispered, smiling when he saw your purple bra. "Pretty." Your top dropped to the floor as he cupped you through the lace, finding your nipples right away. "You feel like going to the beach on Saturday?"

Bradley's lips found the tops of your breasts, and you could no longer formulate real words. You just hummed in response already knowing he was going to take expert care of you right now and on Saturday as well.

"You could wear your purple bikini and tell all the other guys to fuck off," he said as he ran his nose softly along your skin while he unhooked your bra and let it fall next to your top. 

"Would you like that?" you asked as your fingers tangled up in his hair. He answered you by nodding as he took your nipple between his lips. Bradley was all big hands on your bare skin and just the perfect amount of roughness. "Oh god," you whined. 

And then he had you on your back in the middle of the area rug with his body over yours. His thigh was rubbing you through your thin pants, and you bucked up gently against him as his heavy weight pressed deliciously against your body. "I love you," he grunted as you tugged at his hair. 

"I love you so much, Daddy," you gasped as he yanked your pants and underwear down and off, leaving you in only your socks. He fumbled with the front of his pants for just a few seconds before pulling his length free, and you spread your legs wide for him.

His lips and tongue were wet on your neck as you held him close, lost in the domesticity of having sex here now. Just like your first time with him. Right next to the snag in the rug. But this time you could hear Skittles' claws tapping across the kitchen floor, and you could see some of Noah's crayons that had rolled under the couch while Bradley fucked you. You could smell the lingering scent of the pasta sauce from the dinner you made. You could taste Bradley's now familiar tongue as it met yours. And you could feel his rough hands on your hips and belly where he'd now touched you hundreds of times. 

You fell in love with the flood of familiarity he brought to your senses, and it left you smiling up at him when he broke the kiss. "Jesus," he grunted, cupping one cheek in his hand. You kissed the side of his thumb as he stroked your skin, and you watched him slowly come undone for you. "I'll get you there," he promised, changing his angle so he rubbed your clit with each movement.

Just like the first time, he filled you up as soon as you came, and your name was all over his lips as you smiled at the lost crayons before closing your eyes. Bradley collected you against his body as he eased himself down onto his side, and you sighed contentedly. You held onto his wrist as he ran his hand along your hair and kissed you. In that moment you would have agreed to anything he said. 

"Baby, I'll be a little late on Wednesday night. I have to take Skittles to get her cast off, and then I need to stop at the store."

You hummed softly in response, pressing your lips to his. "Sounds good."

------------------------------

The only time Bradley heard from you on Wednesday was when you told him that one of your patients came in with an emergency, and you wanted to let him know you'd be helping Dr. Kelly with a minor surgical procedure. He was excited for you, but he didn't want to bother you. Even though he had good news.

"Congrats," Jake drawled in the locker room after a very long day of flying. "Don't know how you managed to pull this one off, but I heard you're flying in the air show."

Bradley ran his towel over his chest before tossing it into his locker. "Thanks," he grunted, trying not to smile. He'd be able to take you on the tour of the hospital with him, and then you and Noah could watch him fly. His son had never seen him in the air before, and it gave Bradley goosebumps knowing that the two of you would be able to do that together. 

Jake gave him one last appraising look before he got dressed. Honestly, it was probably the fact that you upped the ante with Cyclone that Bradley was chosen over the others. Perhaps now things could be called even. You managed to keep everyone on their toes in the best way, and it made him smile even now. 

You were in rare form this week, luring him in for living room floor sex when there was a perfectly new bed in the bedroom. And then last night, you got him to watch a Disney princess movie with you, even after Noah was in bed, and Bradley had begrudgingly enjoyed it. You were laying across his lap on your back when the end credits rolled, and you said, "If you're a good boy, I'll make you beignets just like Princess Tiana."

Bradley had smirked. "Do those have cream filling?"

"No," you whispered as he eased your shirt up so his palm was flat on your belly. 

"Do you want some?" 

He had been thinking about getting you pregnant as he made you bury your face in the couch pillows to keep you quiet.

And that was just one of the many reasons he was about to leave work and head home to grab Skittles before stopping at the jewelry store across town. If Casey managed to bump into there and ruin this surprise as well, he would probably lose his mind. But the jeweler near the animal shelter was one of the best in the city, so that was where he would go. 

Bradley awkwardly held Skittles while he drove, and eventually she curled up with her head on his thigh while he sat in traffic. She seemed to be doing great, so he hoped that was a good sign that the cast could come off. You and Noah were delighted with her, and she somehow made Bradley fall in love, too. 

"Yeah, you're sweet," he told her, scratching her behind the ears while he drove. He parallel parked the Bronco with one hand while he continued to pet her, and when he took her inside the shelter, he held onto her a little tighter. It was hard to believe she'd been here just a few weeks ago, completely unwanted. 

Bradley pressed kisses to the top of her head as he waited for the receptionist to finish her phone call. When she hung up, she asked, "And who do we have here?"

"Skittles Bradshaw," he replied, nuzzling his nose against her fur and wondering how on earth he had gotten so attached to this little pup. "Hopefully she can get her cast off today."

He only had to wait a few minutes, and then he watched as they examined her before cutting into the cast plaster. Once she was free, Skittles took a few tentative steps across the exam table, and then she jumped right back into Bradley's arms. 

After he paid the monstrous bill for such a small creature, he carried her down the sidewalk, enjoying the cooling temperature as the sun set. When he checked his phone, he saw that you'd finally texted him again.

My Princess: Noah and I are going to play at the park near the beach. Leftovers when you get home?

He typed out a quick message letting you know that sounded perfect. Thoughts of you and Noah together filled his mind as he entered the jewelry store, and two women looked up at him and Skittles. "Is it okay if I have her in here?" he asked, but they both immediately rushed over, practically screeching about how cute his dog was. Honestly, the pet would have probably worked out better than the dating app had for him.

"What are you looking for?" the first woman asked as she petted Skittles on her head. 

A soft smile made its way to his lips as he said, "An engagement ring."

"Oh! Of course, let's just head over here to see what you like best. Do you have anything specific in mind?"

Bradley followed behind her as he nodded and said, "A princess cut diamond."

------------------------

A princess for a Princess. Also, there is no way Skittles wouldn't be a magnet for all the ladies. A big man with a small dog... just fuck. Thanks to @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 45

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[thisisntablogspost]

Say You’re Mine - Miniseries

READ PART ONE HERE

Noah Sebastian x Reader

Warning: MDNI! This miniseries contains triggers that may cause a negative effect to the consumer. This includes cheating, forced proximity, toxic dom/sub dynamics, unhealthy relationships, alcohol, coercion, manipulation, unprotected piv (don’t do this). The reader is consenting and allows these things to happen to them.

Authors note: Thank you so much for the positive feedback! I hope you enjoy part two as much as I did writing it! If this isn’t something you don’t want to read please avoid and I’ll catch you on the next one! If I missed any other triggers please dm me so I can add them. I want you all to be safe when reading my fanfics. Your mental health matters. 🖤

Part Two.

It’s only been a week since you last saw Noah. You’ve been on edge ever since your last “endeavor” with him. Ryan hasn’t noticed anything different, of course he hasn’t. You feel bad that you allowed Noah to manipulate you so easily. It’s what he does best.

A group chat message is sent out about a get together today around noon. Your stomach drops when you see that Ryan replied that you two would be attending.

“I don’t want to go, Ryan” you say immediately when he walks out of the bathroom. He looks at you with a confused expression on his face.

“Why? You had fun last week at the Halloween party, right? I was bummed I couldn’t go” he sighed, sitting down on the couch as you stood in the kitchen making breakfast for the two of you.

You look up to meet his gaze, you offer a smile.

“I did…but it wasn’t the same without you.” You grab the spatula mixing the eggs together, making sure they cook through completely. The buzzer on the toaster goes off signaling the toast is done. He watches you gather everything together for you both, he comes to the table and helps you set up the table.

“Come on, y/n. It’ll be fun. Besides, your plus one will be with you. Please, baby” he gives you that damn pouty lip and puppy dog eyes. You laugh. You step up on your toes to give him a kiss. His green eyes staring into yours with so much love. It made you queasy that you messed around with Noah. The guilt is eating you up inside, yet, you couldn’t bring yourself to tell him the truth of what happened.

“You’re annoying, haha, okay fine. We can go.” He fist bumps the air, you laugh again as you bring over the rest of the dishes for breakfast. He lets you set down everything and wraps his arms around you, bringing you into a passionate kiss.

—

You and Ryan arrived at the house. Ryan shuts off the car, taking out the keys, and gets out making his way to your side to open the door. You thank him, your heart is pounding, your palms are sweaty. You truly don’t want to be here. You don’t want to be put in the same situation again. You don’t want that temptation to be presented to you. Ryan walks in front of you to knock on the door, jolly answers with a hello and smile. Jolly steps aside to let you and Ryan in. Your eyes darted around the room to look for Noah. You’re taken away from your thoughts. You smile, hugging jolly and the rest of the guys. Ryan went off with the guys and you are alone. You walk over to the kitchen, spotting the cooler, and opening it to get out a cold bottle of water. You twist the lid, drinking a large gulp. You look over to see Noah looking at you. You freeze in place, like a deer caught in headlights.

Noah smirks, pocketing his phone. He crosses his arms and sinks into the couch. He’s watching you like a predator watching his prey. You could tell by his widening smile that he loved the effect he had on you. He loved how nervous you would get in his presence. He had you right where he wanted. He couldn’t help himself as his eyes trailed along every inch of you. You are exactly how he wanted you tonight. Uneasy and on edge. He is loving every second of it. You find the courage to follow Ryan, and the guys. You didn’t want to give Noah an opportunity to mess with you, because by the looks of it. He is enjoying this twisted game.

As the night went on, you kept close to Ryan. He had his arm wrapped around your shoulder. His gentle caresses up and down your arm. He places a kiss on your cheek. In the midst of the chatting, you excuse yourself to go to the bathroom. Ryan lets go of you and goes back to the conversation. You look over to see Noah isn’t anywhere in sight. You breathe a sigh of relief as you walk down the hallway to the bathroom.

You close the bathroom door behind you. You turn to the mirror. You look a mess. You run your fingers through your hair to fix what you could. Why did he have such an effect on you like this? You close your eyes, inhaling and exhaling. He must’ve left. You haven’t noticed him for a while. You hear footsteps, your eyes moving towards the door. You realize you didn’t lock it. You rush to the door. Noah pushes the door open, quickly pinning you to the wall as he shuts the door locking it. You yelp, everything is happening so quickly. You look up and whimper. His hand instantly finds your jaw, holding you still as his hand tilts your head to look up at him, his face close to yours.

"Look at you…all fidgety, nervous…and I’ve barely done anything"

“Noah…you need to leave” His hand cups your jaw, his hold is firm. His voice is low as his thumb softly rubs your chin.

"You know I’m not going anywhere, right?"

“My boyfriend is here.” You move away from him. You turn your body around to face the counter, and bathroom mirror.

"I know you can't help how you get all worked up for me.” He gets close and presses his chest against your back. You look up at his reflection in the mirror. It’s all too much. This close proximity of him. You try to turn, he holds you in place. He bends forward resting his chin on your shoulder.

“Please..” You don’t know what you’re begging for.

"Please what? Tell me what you want.”

“I’m going to leave this bathroom, and you are not going to follow me.” You glare at him in the mirror. That smug look is a permanent expression on his face as he listens to you.

"You know you don't mean that. You know you need me to touch you again. I own this body, and you know it.” He purrs, his hand trails along your side. Once again, you are at his mercy. You grip the counter. His hands trailing down your back. He pulls your hips against him.

"There it is. Poor thing, look at you. You’re already reacting to me, and I’ve barely done anything.” He says, rubbing his hand along your lower back. You look at his expression. His eyes are trailing over your body as you’re pressed up against him. You whine at his touch, his arousal right up against you. He smirks, biting his lip, meeting your gaze in the mirror. His hand slowly dancing along your waist, and over your hip bone.

"You know what’s funny? You keep acting like you don’t want this, like you don’t want me. Here you are, pinned against the counter, my hands roaming over your body. You haven’t told me to stop. I think you’re lying to yourself.” He snickers, his fingertips caressing your inner thigh.

"I know you need me. You’re a desperate little thing, aren’t you?”

“Noah…I…I” You look away from his gaze. He’s quick to turn your head to look up at him.

"Do you want me to stop?" His voice is low and husky. His eyes search yours, waiting for your response. You nod your head yes.

"You want me to stop touching you? You want me not to take control, is that right?" A wicked grin spreads across his face. He pulls away slightly, only to settle next to your ear. You return your gaze to the mirror. You lock eyes with him. Did you want him to stop? His smirk grows, knowing he's got you right where he wants you.

“I…” You hear the knock on the door. Noah smirks, the asshole.

“Yes? Occupied.”

“Y/n? You okay in there?” Your eyes widened. Fuck. It’s Ryan. You struggle to find the right words. Noah’s eyes wandering over your body, the door knob is jiggling.

“I…my stomach hurts…I think it was the food we ate earlier” you say calmly, if he only knew your heart was racing. Noah chuckles darkly in your ear.

“You want me to take you home? Or you want to lay down?” Your heart aches hearing his concerned voice. He truly cares about you. You sigh, looking up at Noah’s reflection in the mirror. You should be telling Noah to fuck off, but you can’t. His hand rubbed your inner thigh softly, seeing how this was such a perfect opportunity. He could do whatever he wanted. Even when your boyfriend is at the door. You are his, and he knew you are weak beneath him. You couldn’t deny him. You grip the counter tighter, trying to not moan or make a sound as he ran a hand over your pussy.

“N-no…I’ll..I’ll lay down after I’m done in here” You try smacking Noah’s hand away, he grabs your wrists, holding them behind your back.

“Okay, babe. Let me know if you need anything.” You hear him walk away.

“So what are you going to do, huh? Get me all riled up again then stop? That’s your plan, right?” His grip on your wrists loosen, letting your hands free. They go back to the counter to steady yourself. His fingers slowly dance along your inner thighs, trailing over your clit. You whine, you look up at him. You feel your arousal soaking your underwear.

"Your boyfriend is outside right now, you know? I'm pretty sure you're supposed to be with him, yet you're right here in your ex's arms. You’re whimpering and wanting me instead.”

“Fuck off, Noah” He chuckles, his hands trailing up your spine. He pushes you down firmly against the counter. You cry out, his hand covers your mouth. He leans over you, his breath fanning over your neck.

"Look at you being so defiant when I know how badly you want me. You can't help that your body yearns for me, even just the sound of my voice makes you weak. Don’t you want to be a good girl for me?” You struggle underneath him, but it’s no use. He keeps you in place. Don’t you want to be a good girl for me? It rings loudly in your head. You shiver, the state of submission coming over you.

“Nnn..yes”

"Then say it. Admit you want me, beg me the way you used to…" His voice is low against your ear.

“I..I want you…”

"Good girl. Now admit you need me, tell me how bad you missed me, and my touch”

“I crave it. It’s all I can think about. It..it scares me how bad I want you” Your pleading expression meets his gaze. His fingers gently scratch your inner thighs as he purrs in your ear.

"That's a good girl. You’re so honest, so weak for me. Look at you trembling underneath my touch, my words. You missed this, didn't you? You missed belonging to me. Oh, but you’re forgetting something, sweet girl” He expression darkens. You know what he’s talking about. You calling him his title, the one he burned into your memory, and my god if you forget it.

“Y-yes, sir..”

His growl sends chills down your spine. You look up at him, he is quick to turn your face back to the mirror.

“That’s my good girl.”

“Please…”

"I need words, use your words. Are you going to be a good girl and tell me what you want?” He chuckles darkly as his fingertips brush over your pussy again, barely touching you. He bends close to your ear to whisper.

“I need you. Please…please…touch me” He smacks your ass hard. Your breath hitches. You jolt forward at the sudden impact from his hand. Noah chuckles darkly. He smacks your ass again. He soothes the sting causing you to squirm as he kneads your red bottom.

"Be a good girl for me, and ask me properly..."

“Please, touch me, sir”

"Good girl, where do you want me to touch you?” He smirks, loving how you beg. His roughness is all telling how badly he needed you.

“Please, touch my pussy, sir. Please.” You moan, feeling his fingers trail all the way, slowly, barely touching you. He was enjoying this, loving how a single touch from him can make you lose control.

"Right here?” You whine, a feather like touch. One to make your body tingle.

“Y-yes, sir” Your breath hitches, your head dropping low.

“Do you need me as badly as I need you?” His breath hot against your neck. He nips at the sensitive skin as he moves your underwear to the side.

“Mmm..yes, sir”

"You're being so good, behaving, begging for it. Only I can make you weak like this, right?" He chuckles darkly, and purrs in your ear.

Yes, sir. Only you make me feel like this.” He pulls his hand away. You whine as he grips your throat making you look at him in the mirror.

“You don’t act like it” He teases. He’s toying with you, breaking you down slowly to succumb to his madness. You can only whimper in response, which makes him laugh.

"Look at how you react to my voice. You’re a pathetic, whimpering mess for me.”

“Y-yes, sir”

"Good girl” He whispers. His hand moves to the middle of your back, holding you in place. He knows how badly you need him. He taps your cunt lightly, it makes your toes curl.

“F-Fuck..” The sensation alone makes your head spin. You need more.

"I won't give you what you want till you beg properly, you know that…"

“I..mmmph..” you huff. You do know that. He pulls his fingers away, you whine in protest. You look at him in the mirror.

" Ah, Ah, Ah. Use your words, and I just might continue. How badly do you need me right now?”

“Please, sir. I need you so bad. Please touch me…I’ll be good, and tell you what I want”

"Go on, be a good girl or you don't get what you want” He grins, watching you slowly turn to shambles.

“Fuck me, go down on me, finger me…please do something, sir.” You hate how desperate you sound for him. You can’t help it, he brings out this side of you.

“Good girl”

"Say it one more time for me. Tell me how badly you need me to take control. How you need me to make you feel good.”

“Please…I need you…please touch me, please take control.” You push back into him, your body is on fire. You need some kind of friction to take the ache away. He tuts at you, holding your hips in place, against him.

*He brings his hand down over your pelvis, barely touching, his fingers brushing against you.

"Tell me you belong to me…" A hushed whisper against your neck.

“I belong to you, sir. Only you.” He’s repeating the same thing he did before. No, not this game. Another part of the game is to make you fall apart, and submit to him completely, continuously tearing down your walls. He leans close and presses his chest against your back.

"Good girl, only I can make you this needy. Only I can make you mine. You missed this, didn't you?" He’s so manipulative. So persuasive with his words.

“Even when I’m with him. I think of you.” He grins. His fingers continue to tease.

"Say who owns you, pretty girl”

“You, sir”

“Only me?” He nips your shoulder. You nod your head yes.

“Say you need me. All of me” You feel his hand gliding up your back, into your hair, grabbing a handful, and tugging her hair back to look at him.

“I need all of you, sir” You wince. He smiles darkly at you in the mirror.

"I'm so close to giving you that. Can you promise you'll behave? Can you be good for me?"

“I’ll be a good girl for you, sir”

"Good…"

He rubs your thighs.

"Then beg…" He growls into your ear. Your eyes widened, you just begged him. You practically gave your vulnerable self to him. This is what he does. You have to remember that. He will keep going until there’s not a thought left in your mind, only him and his words.

“P-Please, sir. Touch me..”

"Say it…like you're desperate…" he laughs, barely touching you. It’s slowly driving you insane. He grips your hips, then wraps his hand around your throat*

“It’s all I can think about, please, sir. Please” His hand tightens around your neck, his lips brushing against your cheek.

"Good girl, tell me how bad you miss me..."

“I…I miss you so much”

"Show me how bad you need this…"

“I want you to fuck me, sir. Please, please, please!” You cringe internally, you sound so…weak. He’s right, you are so weak for him.

"Is that all you can come up with?" He grins. He nips your neck. You can hear him almost snicker at your desperation. His voice gravelly, husky as he whispers in your ear.

"Tell me how badly you need me to make you mine…"

“Noah, please. I’ve been on edge for the past week, because of you working me up, and denying me. Please, I don’t want to be toyed with anymore..”

He bites your earlobe. His voice is low and dangerous.

"And what if I continue to deny you?"

“I think I’ll go insane” He chuckles darkly, loving that you’re so needy for him, just aching for him.

"You'll do as I say, won't you? You wouldn't disobey me…"

“No, sir. I wouldn’t, please.”

"Say you belong to me.." He traces his fingers along your inner thighs.

“I belong to you, sir”

"Say it again for me.” He whispers low and dark, loving how hard it is for you to control yourself.

“I..I belong to you, sir.”

He smirks. He caresses along her body and inner thighs. It's so hard for you to not just grab his hand, and make him give you what you need.

"Say you're mine…" Your gaze returns to the mirror, his eyes locked on yours. Your knuckles are turning white from how tightly you’re gripping the counter. His warm hands running along your body, your pussy, your inner thighs.

“I’m yours..” a breathless response comes from you.

"You're mine to take control over, and you know how good I'm going to make you feel. How weak you're going to be for me..."

“Please…please touch me, sir. I can’t take it anymore” These mind games of his are starting to take their toll on you.

"You're so desperate…so needy for me…" He purrs in your ear as his fingers circle around your covered pussy. You buck into his hand.

"Say you need me so badly that you can't take any more teasing, and denial…" He nuzzles against your neck, his lips brushing against your sensitive skin. He dips his head placing a kiss on your collarbone. Your breath hitches, your eyes return to his in the mirror. Your lips part to protest, but it’s nothing more than a whine of need and desire. You let your head fall back against his chest. He holds you tightly against him. A somewhat peaceful moment between such a chaotic scene.

“I don’t want to admit how much I miss you. You’re so bad for me. I can’t help myself around you.” You feel him smirks against your skin. You feel your body melt underneath him. Your hands releasing the counter, your body weak.

"I'm so bad for you, and yet you can't resist me. How unfortunate.” He says against her neck as his hands dance over your pussy. He’s still not giving you what you want. His hands move along your thighs, he brings one up to your stomach, it trails up between the valley of your breasts, up to your neck. He ever so delicately places his hand around your throat. You look up at him, he’s already looking down at you. His hand tightens around your throat.

"Do you want me to take control over you, to own your body, and make you mine?”

“Please”

“Please what, use your words. You’re so quick to forget.” His hand tightening around your throat. His voice low and dark in your ear.

“Ahhh…y-yes, sir.” You reach up to hold his arm. His grip tightens making your head spin, and your body betray you.

"You can't help but give in to me, can you? You want to be mine, to belong to me, to submit, and give in, don't you?" He nibbles along your neck. His grip tightening around your neck, watching your body shudder.

“Yes, sir”

"I know how badly you want it. You're being such a good girl, look how weak you are, look how needy you are. You're trembling in my arms…" He says in a condescending tone in your ear.

"But you're not begging for it, are you? You need to beg me for it, be my good girl.”

“Yes…yes I’ll be good please, sir” He touches your pussy once more, you arch against him. Your body is on edge, the slightest touch from him is causing your brain to short circuit. He tugs down your leggings, tossing them somewhere. His hands roam over your ass. You look back at him, he suddenly stops. He smirks at you, waiting to see if you would beg. He knew you needed it badly, so bad you’d beg for him.

“Take them off, please, sir.”

“There we go. Look at you, being a good girl.” He slowly pulls your underwear down, finally giving you what she want. The cool air makes you shiver, yet, your body is scorching hot. He kicks your feet apart. Your body lowers onto the marble counter.

"Mm…you look so good like this. So vulnerable, and all mine.” He groans, needing you so badly. You see him drop to his knees behind you.

"I know what you need, what you crave. There’s a dark little side of you that’s enjoying this.” He runs his tongue up the back of your thigh. You moan, the feeling of his tongue and hands is otherworldly. You could feel him smirking against you. He knew how bad you needed this. He begins to lick and suck at the flesh around your pussy, but never going where you need him most. His fingers tease around your entrance, through your folds, around the entirety of your pussy.

“So wet. All for me?” You pant, whimpering as his finger is inserted into your core. He slowly moves his finger in and out of you. He places kisses along your inner thighs, working back up to your clit.

“My god, Noah…fuck…please” He stops which causes you to whine and push your hips back. You see him move back slightly.

"Please what…"

“You want me to stop? Hmm? Your soaking cunt is telling me otherwise, you greedy little girl”

“I need more, sir. Please”

"Beg one more time for me”

“Mmph…please, sir.” His hands run up your thighs lightly, the feather like touches tickling you.

"You're such a good girl begging for me.” You enjoyed his praises. He leans in closer to your core, his hot breath fanning over you. It sends shiver throughout your body. He places a kiss on your clit, running his tongue up through your folds. Your breath hitches when he does that, he does it again. He starts sucking your clit into his mouth. You groan, pushing into him. You feel your body shaking.

“You taste so fucking good.” He swirls his tongue around your clit, then over your entrance. You are crumbling fast. You craved this, loved it when he ate you out. He moves his hands to your waist to keep you steady as he worships you. You feel the band in your belly winding up tight, your breath hitches as you feel your release building.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck” You grind against his face, he smirks against you. You know he’s loving how you give into him so easily.

"You're mine, only mine…" He said it in between kisses and licks. You feel your knees buckling. He adds a finger, then another. You arch your back, it feels so good. He huffs, you’re so worked up and wet. There’s no resistance as his fingers sink deep in you. He starts with that agonizing slow pace again. He turns and curves his digits coaxing you, working you as the need for your release grows stronger and stronger.

“Atta girl, so good for me. I need you to beg me to make you mine.”

“Please, make me yours, sir. Please.”

"Good girl, say you belong to me.” His fingers curl up, he knew you so well. He knows exactly what you needed.

“Ohhh fuck…right there…I belong to you, sir!” Your whimpers get louder, he keeps his pace. Simultaneously fingering and swirling tight circle around your clit. You’re so close.

"Say it again…"

“I..I belong to you, sir” You whimper, you are right there on the edge. You wouldn’t dare cum without his permission.

"Again…" He smiles, whispering against you as he nuzzles his nose against your clit.

“I belong to you, sir.” He moved his fingers with such precision, coaxing you to go over the edge. It was so bad and so good at the same time. Your mind wanders back to Ryan. Poor Ryan. He didn’t deserve this…or you. He smacks your ass, a warning. He’s always watching your every move. He must’ve noticed the change in your body language. He stops and stands up, his arms caging you in, his hands next to yours on the counter.

“Don’t think about him, turn it off. You’re only thinking of me. Do you understand? I will leave you with fucking nothing. Only the mess I made of you to clean up. Got it?” You cry out as he smacks your ass much harder this time.

“I said, do you understand me, y/n? Answer me.” He is leaning over you, grabbing a handful of hair, yanking it tightly as his lips brush against your ear.

“Y-yes, sir. I understand.” His eyes watch yours in the mirror. He looks over you in your current state. A disheveled mess just for him. He growls, his nostrils flare. He shoves your head forwards, sinking back down behind you. He goes right back to fingering you, like nothing happened. Your mind is fuzzy, you try to focus on the sensations he’s bringing you. He hits the spots within you and your eyes rolls back. His tongue finds your clit again, sucking harder this time. You squeal, he growls, doing it again. You are panting, hating that he’s coaxing you to your release again within seconds.

“Who. Do. You. Belong. To? Hmm? Whose pussy is this?” He picks up his pace, hitting that spot over and over again.

“Yours. It’s all yours, sir. I belong to you.” You whine and moan. Your knees are buckling. It’s right there.

“Good girl. Good fucking girl.” He pulls away from your clit to bite your thighs, you whine. He soothes the sting running his tongue along his bite marks. He returns to your clit, swirling those tantalizing tight circles, sucking your bud into his mouth.

“I’m..gonna…cum.” He doesn’t say anything, he keeps going. It’s all too much, the band in your belly is about to snap.

“Please, sir. May I cum, please?” Noah could feel your walls clenching around his fingers. You are so close, why isn’t he answering. You look at him, you can see his hooded eyes as he comes up from eating you. He makes eyes contact with you.

"No…" He smiles at that, and stops. Your knees buckle, you drop to the floor. You couldn’t believe he’d deny you again. You look up at him, tears in your eyes.

“Why? I…I…” You watch him towering above you, his mouth wrapped around his fingers, tasting you. He licks them clean, wiping them on a towel. He crouches down on his knees and strokes your cheek. His thumb gently wipes away your tears.

"Good things don't come easy, now do they?” You pull away from his touch. You look away as he stands up, chuckling to himself as he makes his way to the door.

"I'll see you around, y/n. I'll let you go back to your boyfriend now. I want you to remember how weak you are to me.” He closes the door behind him, the tears roll down your cheeks. You wipe them, then look up to see the door is unlocked. You quickly get up to lock the door. You didn’t need anyone to see you in your current state. You gather your underwear and leggings, pulling them back up onto your body. You ached, you are pissed off, and frustrated.

After a few minutes to collect yourself, you exit the bathroom. You walk down the hallway, no one is in the house. You hear voices outside. Ryan is helping Folio cook the burgers and hotdogs. You walk outside and Ryan sees you instantly. He wraps his arms around you, placing a kiss on your forehead.

“You okay?” You nod, the ache in your heart is to strong.

“I’m going to go lay down. Let me know when food is ready.” He kisses you, then lets you go find a room to get away from everyone for a while.

(Don’t hate me. To be continued 🖤)

[happiest-hotch]

Deserving

Summary: Aaron has a rough day being a dad, and you reassure him that he is very deserving of your family

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader (Angst/Fluff)

Word Count: 2.3k

Life with three children is not always easy. It's crazy to think it's been over a year since you and Aaron went from having two kids- Jack and your daughter, Eden- to three, adding sweet baby Noah to the family.

Mornings, although they've become a well-oiled routine, are always a challenge, but they're a satisfying one to complete.

Today, Aaron's slightly changed the patterns. Without an early morning budget meeting, mountains of paperwork, or active case, he's home until a 10 am call time for a case briefing at the BAU, which is very rare for a weekday.

So, instead of breakfast duty, you're taking the first shower while he handles getting everyone fed. 

You don't doubt his abilities, but your morning showers are always quick and effective, as opposed to your relaxing nighttime ones, which, when you're lucky, take place with Aaron, so you're dressed and ready for the day quickly. However, the glorious difference of having someone else there is that you don't get interrupted once. 

The chaos quickly catches up when you walk downstairs and hear your sweet baby boy crying loudly, very unhappy.

Aaron's frantically trying to calm the tear, offering him different types of cereal as a substitute for his toast and every juice in the fridge as he deduces the cause of an early morning crying fit. Jack looks done with his younger brother, sitting at the kitchen island with his hands over his ears, which makes it difficult for him to eat. He'd love a momentary reprieve of being able to travel two years back in time. He adores his younger brother, but you're not totally sure he wouldn't send him back for some momentary peace. As for Eden, she's nowhere to be found.

You spot the problem in a second, walking over and kissing the top of Jack's head before ruffling his hair affectionately. "Can you stop him now?" He implores.

Aaron looks at you with similarly pleading eyes, ready to admit defeat. 

You take the plate from in front of the toddler, open the cupboard and take a different one out before you switch the food over and slide the new plate across the countertop.

In a second, his tears stop, and he digs into his toast like nothing has happened. The tears on his red hot cheeks dry as he eats happily. With a look of thanks, Jack digs into his breakfast.

"He doesn't like the blue plate." You explain to Aaron.

Your husband frowns, as confused as you were when you first noticed the quirk. "He eats off it every night." You've even learned to bring it to Rossi's for your fussy baby. 

"Only at night and occasionally afternoon snack." You report to him.

Aaron's heart sinks, and the fact he doesn't know that about his own child hits him deep down. It's no secret that he's not always there, physically much less than most dads, and it weighs heavily on him.

"Oh." He lets out, trying to mask the disappointment he feels with himself. He turns around, grabbing your favorite mug. "Coffee, baby."

You smile, kissing his lips before gratefully taking the mug. "Thank you." You glance around the room again, not seeing a four-year-old coming running into the room. "Where's E?"

Aaron quickly puts down his mug. "Shit." 

Jack chuckles at his dad's unusual swear before looking down at his oatmeal when Aaron glowers at him. 

"It's okay." You place a gentle hand on his chest. "I'll sort her." With a quick kiss on Noah's forehead, you leave before Aaron can stop you. 

Her great drama of the morning is an easy fix when you brush through her hair with the detangler meant for dry hair, not wet. She didn't inherit straight hair like her older brother and dad, and she wants to keep her hair long, which means it gets knotted overnight. You don't blame Aaron for the hiccup. He can't have known when you're the one who usually brushes his hair- his specialty being braiding- and the bottles look identical aside from the tiny writing, which you know he can't see because, although you wouldn't tell him, he probably should be wearing reading glasses. 

"What's wrong?" Aaron asks, his voice laced with panic when his head peaks around her door. 

"You're done, baby." You tell her, letting her climb off the chair and go to brush her teeth. You walk over to Aaron, hoping to provide some relief that nothing is wrong and that his children are just as dramatic as he is. "She only uses the one in the bathroom if her hair is wet. When it's dry, it's the one at her dressing table." You love your boys, biologically related to you or not, so much, but you love having a girly girl. Aaron's out of his depth. Even learning to braid took effort and nights of practicing on your hair, but he succeeded. As ill-prepared as he feels for the future, you know he'll always try for his baby girl. It's something you adore about him.

"I'm sorry." He apologizes sheepishly, looking down at the carpet.

You wrap your arm around his waist, and his arms hold you tightly, both of you appreciating a quick hug in the hallway. "You can't expect yourself to be perfect."

But you are. Aaron doesn't say it, but it's on the tip of his tongue. 

"Go get ready." You instruct him. "I'll hold down the fort." 

You're always holding down the fort. "Okay." He agrees, only leaving your side after taking a long kiss that he feels undeserving of. 

Aaron's packed Eden and Jack's lunchboxes, which you're sure he's added loving notes to.

You get Noah changed for daycare, making sure he's got an extra change of clothing in his bag since he got paint all over his spare shirt.

Then you place him in front of the TV to watch cartoons with his siblings. Jack's too old for them, but he's such a good big brother that he never complains.

Your next task is packing lunch for the person who overlooked packing it for himself, writing him a note that you hope makes him smile. 

He's also effective at getting himself ready, often having to do it quickly and in the middle of the night without enough sleep, and he's finished quicker than you were. 

Aaron surveys the scene in the living room when he comes downstairs to find it quiet, much different from how you had. "How are they all ready to go?" He asks, and you see confusion where he's plagued with self-doubt.

"You did a lot of it." You assure him, aware your role this morning was fixing mistakes. "Are you taking Jack, and I'll take the other two?"

He's quiet for a second, brain buzzing away inside his head. "Yes. Yeah, that works." He agrees. 

You notice those little details, but it's easy to assume it's about the incoming stress of his workday. "Okay, well, I love you."

That gets a quicker reaction. "I love you, too." He says, cupping your cheeks to kiss you sweetly. 

"Team Hotchner?" You offer out a fist bump. 

Aaron takes it with a chuckle that momentarily halts his frown. "Team Hotchner." He turns to the living room. "Jack, you ready?"

He nods, high-fiving his sibling before tossing his backpack over his shoulder and walking to the door.

"Love you, and have a good day." You tell him, pulling him into a side hug. 

He hugs you properly. "Love you too."

Then two of your favorite people are out the door to continue their days, and you turn back to the other two. "Alright, babies, let's go."

~

Jack fills Aaron in on what's going on at school, or- as Aaron profiles it- everything minus the social aspects. 

They pull up to the drop-off zone, and Aaron stops, knowing Jack has grown past wanting his dad to walk him into class. "Have a good day, bud." He says. 

"Uh, Dad?" Jack starts awkwardly. "Did you bring lunch money for me?" Nope. Aaron didn't even know Jack's been buying his lunch. "It's just Y/n always-"

Aaron nods, fishing out his wallet from his pocket. "Y-yeah, of course." He answers. 

Due to how infrequently he pays in cash, the only notes he has are $50s, probably- and hopefully- not what you give Jack each day. 

He hands it over, and Jack scrunches his nose. "This is way too much." He states. 

Thankfully, Aaron thinks quickly on his feet. "Treat your friends." He offers.

Jack grins, knowing he has permission to carry such a large sum of money to a 13-year-old. "Awesome. Thanks, Dad." 

Then he's gone, and once he's out of eyesight, Aaron throws his head back against the headrest, hitting the steering wheel in frustration. 

He runs a hand through his hair, feeling utterly useless and like he doesn't have enough of a purpose in the family you've built together. Although you've always treated Jack like your own, you know his son better than he does, and that's a warning sign that he can't ignore. It doesn't feel like it was together when he thinks about it. He was just there while you effortlessly did it all.

It's a bad day at work. It starts before he gets there, and it doesn't get better. The silver lining is there's no case that the team can't consult on from Quantico. Still, he can't bring himself to return home when he should. It gets later and later, and his thoughts spiral as he looks out across the dark bullpen and feels like he's 12 years in the past when he was losing Haley because he couldn't be a dad or a husband. He's trying to be different, better, learn from his mistakes because he doesn't get another shot, and he can't stand the thought of letting you down. He's surprised he even got a second chance.

By the time he gets home, the kids are in bed. Jack's light is still on, but the house is silent. The TV's on low, but you're paying more attention to your phone than it. 

"Hey, baby, long day at work?" You wonder, not at all sounding mad about it. 

Aaron feels like he needs to be punished, yelled at, and made to sleep on the couch, but he's met with understanding. 

"Mhm." He answers, dropping his briefcase in his office and his keys on the side table.

"There's dinner in the microwave." You continue talking in your lighthearted tone. 

It's wrong to be short with you, and he hates himself for it. "Thanks." 

It's a pretty obvious sign.

You know something's wrong. 

He thinks he's good at hiding it, but he's not when your focus is solely on him. 

You're patient, letting him take your time as you put your phone down and wait until he's sitting next to you on the couch after eating. 

"What's wrong?" You ask. 

Aaron can sense your watchful stare and acts like he's focused on the TV. "Nothing." 

"Aaron Hotchner." You warn. "I would appreciate your honesty. Whenever you're ready." 

God, he loves you. There's nothing he's done in his life to deserve someone as understanding as you. "You're the definition of a supermom." He tells you. "I'm not jealous. You keep everything running smoothly here, and any stumbles you react to with so much grace. But I'm failing." You hate that he thinks that of himself. He's not perfect, but neither are you or anyone. One thing Aaron isn't doing is failing. "I barely know anything about our kids, stuff I should know, and I would know if I were a good dad. The thing is, I'm never here." Before you can dispute the claim, he continues. "I'm not, Y/n. If it's not casework, it's paperwork, but I'm never here as much as I should be. I don't deserve any of this."

You hate seeing him like this, having talked himself into his feelings all day. "Aaron." You coo, cupping his cheeks and trying to wipe up his tears. "Baby, you're allowed to make mistakes. Our kids love you and think you're the best dad in the world." You assure him. "Jack has looked at you like you're a superhero since I met him, and E and Noah do too. Every time you're away, they know you're out there saving people."

"You really think so?" He asks. "All of that?"

You nod, brushing your nose against his gently. "100%. There's never been a doubt in my mind that you deserve this family. You've got to believe me." 

A flicker of a smile lights up his face. "I do." He decides. 

"Did you eat your lunch?" You wonder. 

Aaron's unsure where it came from, but he sheepishly looks away from you. "I didn't."

You hit him lightly on the chest, scolding him for not eating. "Then you didn't see the note I added." 

"What did it say?" He asks, more excited knowing he's not in trouble.

You debate making him wait until tomorrow, but he needs to know. "Thank you for being the best dad ever to our kids. I love you." You recite.

It seems too convenient, and he frowns. "Really?"

"I think it's a soulmate thing." It's the only explanation you can come up with, having not known this morning that his stress was because he was worried about not being a good enough dad.

"I love you." He says, closing the small gap between you to kiss you.

You go in for another kiss once he pulls back. "I love you, too." You remind him. "Bedtime?" You ask when he yawns. "Then you can have another shot at perfecting the morning routine." 

He nods, grateful for everything. "Let's do it."

[albertasunrise]

Hope - Hope I See You Again

Masterlist

Summary: After Joel loses his wife and your best friend during childbirth. You support him as he takes on parenthood on his own at 22. But when feelings start to develop, you battle with the guilt you feel for falling for your best friend’s husband.

Relationships: Joel Miller x Reader

Warnings: Like AO3 I choose to give none. Read at own risk. 18+… this is to avoid spoilers! (So a longer chapter...Another angst fest but I hope you enjoy. Had most of this written out already hence posting it so quickly after chapter 4, can't wait to heart what y'all think ♥️)

Series Masterlist - Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

10 years later...

"Sarah!" Joel calls up the stairs as he munches on his toast "Hunny you're going to be late." 

"COMING!" She replied as thumping steps erupted on the landing. 

Joel chuckled as he listened to his daughter clamber down the stairs, smiling when she planted a kiss on his cheek and skipped to the plate of toast he left on the side for her. 

"You're a good father." She said as she ravaged the breakfast he made her. 

"I try to be." 

"You make some for Uncle Tommy?" She asked as her ears perked up at the sound of his truck parking on the drive. 

"Yeah, yeah..." Joel waved her off "Although he's gonna eat me outa house n' home at this rate." 

"Who is?" Tommy asked as he walked into the kitchen, giving his brother a friendly slap on the arm as he passed. 

"You asshole." Joel grumbled, eliciting a snigger from Sarah. 

"Sarah baby... you're gonna miss the bus if you don't leave." Joel said as he eyed the clock. 

"Ah... crap... Okay, gotta go. See ya later Uncle Tommy." She said sweetly as she kissed his cheek before skipping to her father to do the same thing "Still on for tacos tonight?" 

"Wouldn't be Tuesday without them." Joel winked before waving at his daughter as she sprinted out the door. 

"Ready?" Tommy asked as he unceremoniously shoved the last of his toast into his mouth. 

"One of these days, you're gonna choke." He snorted as he pushed himself to his feet "I'm driving today." He said as he snatched up the keys and headed to the garage. 

...

Joel was just finishing up laying the table when Sarah came screaming in. He couldn't understand how she had so much energy despite being at school all day and then soccer practice afterwards. 

"HEY!" She shouted, practically skipping into the kitchen. 

"Hey baby girl, how was your day?" He asked as he grabbed and placed the serving spoon into the bowl of chorizo and potatoes that he'd just finished frying off. 

"Great, do you mind if a friend joins us?" She asked sheepishly, smiling sweetly at him as he turned to see a tall boy beside her. 

He seemed familiar. His dark hair and piercing blue eyes reminded him of someone he used to know. 

"Dad this is Noah." She said sweetly "He's new and his mum wasn't able to get him from school so I said he could come here for dinner and then you could drop him home later?" 

The boy's name made Joel's stomach twist. There was no way this was the boy that had been practically glued to Sarah's side as a toddler. There are plenty of kids with that name. 

"Baby I-" 

"I know I should have asked first but Dad... you always make extra so there will be plenty for all of us." She pleaded with her big brown eyes, knowing that it would win him over. 

"I don't wanna impose Mr Miller, sir." Noah said, his head dropping "I can probably walk home from here." 

"Sit down." Joel grumbled as he motioned to the table with his head, smiling when Sarah kissed his cheek and whispered thanks in his ear. 

He watched as Sarah eagerly dug into the food on the table before noting Noah's hesitance. 

"Dig in son." Joel encouraged and Noah gave him a nervous nod before doing as he was bid. 

Dinner then passed fairly easily. Sarah talked about school and practice as Noah smiled at her enthusiasm. 

"So where are you from Noah?" Joel asked as he wiped his hands on his napkin and grabbed his beer to take a swig. 

"I was actually born here." Noah confessed and Joel's heart sped up a little "My parents moved when I was little. Dad wasn't well and so we moved closer to my grandma." 

"You don't say." Joel replied, his heart in his throat as Noah continued. 

"We moved back here 'cus mum got a job in Austin. Thought it would be good to get a new start after dad..." He trailed off, his eyes growing sad. 

"Perhaps next taco Tuesday you can bring Ali?" Sarah suggested as she gave Noah's arm a friendly squeeze. 

"Ali?" Joel asked and Noah smiled sweetly "Ali's my little sister. Short for Alison." He replied sweetly "Well little ish... She's a few years younger than me." 

"Joel thought he was going to be sick. There was no way this wasn't the Noah he knew as a boy." 

"Dad..." Sarah called but Joel felt like he was drowning, her calls for him muffled like his head was underwater. 

"DAD!" She shouted and he leapt from his skin as he returned his attention to both of them "You okay?" 

"What?" Joel asked as his eyes flitted between the two kids "Oh... Yeah, sorry just uh... Just a long day." 

Noah's cell phone ringing filled the awkward silence that had blanketed the room and when he pulled it out to see who it was, he excused himself to take it. 

"You sure you're okay dad?" Sarah asked as she grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze "You look like you've seen a ghost." 

"Yeah, baby." He replied sweetly, trying his hardest to be convincing "I'm fine." 

10 years earlier...

"Joel, you need to take it easy man." Tommy pleaded as he pushed his brother back onto the bed "They cut into your fucking skull man." 

"What I need... is to get out of here." Joel grumbled as he let out a frustrated huff. 

"Sarah and I nearly lost you." Tommy choked, his eyes growing glossy as he remembered the last few weeks "We've watched you crash twice... Been told to prepare for the worst more times than I wanna remember... So please, just rest." 

"How are they?" He asked and Tommy sighed "They're doing as well as can be expected." Tommy sighed and Joel nodded "I think the kids have been a great distraction though." 

Joel smiled at that.

"When do you ship out?" Joel asked, changing the subject and Tommy signed "Sunday. Now you're not knocking on death's door, they've decided it's time for me to leave." 

"I'll be okay." Joel promised but Tommy didn't look convinced "I promise."

...

2 weeks later...

Joel watched as you puttered around the house, looking anything but relaxed as you finished clearing up after lunch. He gingerly pushed himself to his feet, wincing when his stitches pulled. 

"Need some help?" He asked as he limped into the kitchen. 

"No." You replied plainly and Joel sighed.

"Please, let me help." Joel pleaded and you growled in frustration. 

"You can help me by sitting the fuck down so you don't pull a stitch." You growled and Joel shrunk back. 

You'd been cold towards him since he got out and Joel couldn't say he blamed you. You were now stuck babysitting him as he recovered from three major surgeries on top of his daughter whom you'd been caring for for almost a month. 

"Please... I just... I want to help." 

"You've done enough Joel." That statement had him shrinking away from you as he nodded. 

"I'm going to check on Sarah." He said quietly as he limped from the kitchen.

"She's sleeping."

Joel didn't reply. Just left you to finish your frantic cleaning as he limped away with his tail between his legs.

Present day...

"Sorry." Noah said as he stepped back into the room "Was my mum." 

"Everything okay? Sarah asked and Noah nodded. 

"Yeah, just a broken arm." 

"What happened?" Joel asked, his confusion obvious from his expression. 

"Oh, my sister hurt herself during gym." Noah replied "Why mum couldn't grab me... Was up the hospital with her." 

"What about you dad?" Joel asked and Noah grew quiet again. 

"Noah's dad died a few months ago." Sarah pipped up and Joel's eyes almost bugged out of his skull.

"Shit... I'm... Shit I'm so sorry son I-"

"It's fine." Noah assured him as he gave Joel a weak smile "Not like you knew." 

"Do you need me to drop you home?" Joel asked and Noah nodded. 

"If you don't mind." 

Joel gave him a friendly smile before grabbing his truck keys off the side. 

"Come on." 

...

Sarah sat in the back as Noah directed Joel home. He couldn't help but think about the little boy he'd known a decade ago and how he'd grown into this polite young man. Part of him wanted to confess that he and Sarah had been inseparable as kids but until he was sure that he was who he thought he was, Joel needed to keep that information to himself. 

"This is me." Piped up Noah as he pointed at a house with a Large Volvo parked in the drive. 

It was nice. Exactly the sort of house he'd pictured you living in. Pulling up, the porch light flicked on and the door opened, revealing a face that Joel had thought he'd never see again. Time had been kind to you. Your hard was cut to just below the shoulders and wavy and your features had matured but it was unmistakeably you. 

"Thanks, Mr Miller, sir." Noah said as he unbuckled his seatbelt and grabbed his pack "Thanks for letting me crash Taco Tuesday." 

"Call me Joel, please." 

Noah gave the older man a shy smile before turning to say goodbye to Sarah. Hopping out the truck, Joel watched as Noah jogged up to you and he smiled as he watched to greet the boy with a hug. He'd known you'd be a natural mum. 

You glanced up at him and his heart stopped. Your eyes locked and he wondered if you'd recognise him too but when you squinted before raising your hand in thanks, Joel realised it was too dark in the cab for you to see him. 

Sarah clambering from the back to the front pulled Joel's attention away from the spot you'd been standing and he chuckled at the inelegant way the 12-year-old dumped herself in the passenger seat. 

"So what do you think of Noah?" She asked as she tried to act casual and Joel snorted. 

"He's a good kid." Joel replied as he pulled away from the curb "How did you guys meet anyway?" 

"He had to redo a year." Sarah replied "Not his fault. His dad was in and out of hospital so he missed a lot of school. When they moved here the school suggested that it would be good for him to redo 5th grade." 

"Do you know what happened to his dad?" Joel asked, trying to sound as inconspicuous as possible. 

"Apparently his dad was in an accident when he was little. Complications from that had him in and out of hospital but a year ago he got real sick and his immune system just couldn't cope." 

Joel once again felt like he was going to be sick. 

He'd had suffered a few long things from the crash. Back pain and headaches being the key ones but nothing following the surgery he'd had. So to learn that Alec had continued to suffer in the 10 years that followed the accident had him wanting to pull over and vomit up the tacos they'd eaten for dinner. 

You must hate him. 

...

"How was your evening hunny?" You asked as you finished unstacking the dishwasher. 

"Was great." He replied with a smile "Made a friend. Sarah Miller." He continued as he placed the plate you handed him in the cupboard "She invited me to join her and her dad Joel for taco Tuesday." 

"Joel Miller?" You asked, your heart hammering against your ribs as your eyes widened. 

"Yeah... You know him?" Noah asked as he turned to face you "Mum?..." 

"Um... Uh, yeah I..." 

Noah's eye caught a glimpse of a photo on the wall that until now he'd never looked at twice. It was of you and his dad with two guys you'd told him were friends from when you'd lived here. He looked more closely and noted how he was gripping the jeans of a man who looked a lot like Joel and then his eyes flitted to the little girl in the man's arms. His eyes widened as he studied her face. 

"This is them... isn't it?" Noah asked as he turned to look at you, pointing at the photo he'd been studying just a moment ago. 

"I was best friends with Joel's late wife." You answered as you sat down at the kitchen table "You and Sarah were inseparable as kids." You chuckled as you remembered how fond of Sarah Noah had been. 

"Why have you never mentioned them before?" 

"Because we fell out of touch." You confessed, "After your dad's accident, things got tense between us." 

"Tense?" Noah pushed "How?" 

"Joel was driving the car that night." You told him "He almost died but when he left the hospital, I blamed him for your dad's condition and so our friendship kinda fell apart." 

"But Dad's car was t-bone by a drunk truck driver." Noah pushed and you sighed.

"I know."

"So it wasn't Joel's fault." 

"No." You choked as you remembered how bad things had gotten "But I blamed him anyway.

10 years earlier... 

Joel's head was pounding. 

Headaches had been a constant complication from the surgery on his head. Limping into the kitchen, he found you leaning against the counter sipping a cup of coffee as you started out the window across from you. 

If you heard him enter you didn't show it. It had been a week since you'd snapped at him and Joel had done his best to give you space. Even if that meant suffering his increasingly painful headaches but this one was unbearable. 

"Have you seen my pain pills?" He asked as he limped towards you and you shook your head.

"No." 

"Any idea where they could be?" He asked as he tried to rummage through the cupboard for them. 

"No." 

"Please... my head is pounding." He pleaded and that seemed to snap you out of your trance. 

"Oh... You have a headache do you?" You growled condescendingly "Poor Joel's head hurts." 

"Please." Joel pleaded but you were having none of it. 

"Alec is paralysed from the waist down and you want me to keep track of where you put year headache tablets?" You growled and Joel immediately stopped searching. 

"I-"

"The man I love... the father of my unborn child is never going to walk again." You snarled as you slammed down your mug, making Joel flinch from the sound "He's never going to walk again... meanwhile, you get to walk away with no long-term consequences. How is that fair?" 

"I'm so sorry." 

"I don't want your apologies, Joel." You growled, "I just want you out of my life." 

Joel didn't care that you could see his tears. He stood there openly sobbing as you scoffed and turned your back from him.

"I think it's time you left." You said as your hand closed around something in front of you, turning to toss his pain pills at him. 

Joel didn't reply he just nodded. Limping from the kitchen to pack his things. 

He left an hour later. 

Present day...

Noah had been off with you since the evening he'd learned his history with Sarah and Joel. You felt guilty about how you'd treated Joel all those years ago but you'd been pregnant and lost. You'd hated the fact that your husband had been crippled for life and needed someone to blame. 

You'd blamed Joel. 

You were standing in line waiting for your morning coffee when a familiar voice caught your attention. Looking over your shoulder you saw an older Tommy Miller walking towards the bar. 

He ordered his coffee, paid then walked towards you. Only to stop in his tracks when he spotted you and his smile disappeared. 

"Long time no see." You said when he took a few more tentative steps towards you. 

"Yeah. Been a while." He replied plainly and you flinched at his tone. 

"How have you been?" You asked and he shrugged.

"Left the army. Working for Joel now." He replied and you nodded. 

"How is Joel?" You asked as you accepted your coffee from the barista and thanked them. 

"Do you care?" He growled and your brows pulled together. 

"Oh course... I wouldn't have asked if I didn't." 

"He's fine." Tommy grumbled as he poured a few sugars into his coffee before turning to you "He wasn't the night you kicked him out." 

"Tommy I-" 

"He collapsed after getting out of the taxi that had taken him and Sarah home." He interrupted, his tone ice cold as he turned to face you and leaned in closer "He'd developed another brain bleed and almost died. Ali's parents had to fly out from Canada to take care of Sarah whilst Joel fought for his life for a second time." 

"I didn't know." You choked as your hand flew up to your mouth.

"No..." Tommy trailed off as he scoffed at you "You were just too caught up in your own problems to notice how he'd started to go downhill." 

You didn't get a chance to reply. 

Tommy was out of the door before you could utter a syllable. He just left you standing there feeling terrible about the fact that you had neglected him. You had blamed him for your misfortune and you had pushed him away when he needed you. 

You had to fix this. 

Next

For updates follow @albertasunrise-ficsblog

[thefallennightmare]

Comfort-Noah Sebastian

*gif created by me. feel free to use(sorry for the poor quality)*

Pairings: Noah Sebastian x Reader

Warnings: language, mentions of period, and all-around good fluff.

Summary: Reader suffers from really bad period cramps and Noah takes care of her the only way he knows how.

Authors Note: Again, to the anon who requested this, I'M SO SORRY! I completely forgot so I really hope this makes up for it.

"Angel?"

A soft voice sounded from the other side of the door, followed by a gentle knock. I peered over the piles of blankets that I cocooned myself under and called out that the door was open.

"How're you feeling?" Noah asked with a frown.

I sighed and clutched my lower stomach. "The pain is terrible and the warm compress doesn't seem to do much."

It was like this every month for five days. My period cramps were awful, the pain causing me to be stuck in bed for days. Sometimes it would be so bad that I'd be hunched over the toilet, throwing up. It wasn't anything I enjoyed, so I always made sure that I stayed home away from Noah during those five days once a month. However, since we moved in together last month, this was the second time he'd been able to witness firsthand the pain I went through. And just like last month, he was there for whatever I needed.

"I ran you a warm bubble bath if you think you can make it to the bathroom," he nodded towards the bathroom across the hall.

I sat up slowly. "You didn't have to do that."

Noah shrugged before pulling off the mounds of blankets and taking the now cold compress that I was using to soothe my cramps.

"Soak as long as you need and I'll make you something to eat. What do you want?"

Ignoring the shooting pain that spread across my abdomen, I left a kiss on his lips in a way of saying thanks for running me a bath.

"Honestly, surprise me. Anything sweet."

With a gentle pat to my ass, Noah led me to the bathroom where he parted ways with me to trot back downstairs while I spent the next twenty minutes in the tub letting the warm water and bubbles ease some of the pain away.

Once dressed in a pair of Noah's sweats and oversized shirts, I slowly made my way downstairs to the kitchen where I saw Noah leaning over the sink, mixing something in a bowl. He had yet to get dressed for the day, baring all of his tattoos on his stomach, chest, and arms for all, or just me, to see. His long hair was a disheveled mess, but he still looked absolutely breathtaking. If I wasn't on my period, I'd probably make him take me on the counter.

He peered over his shoulder as he heard me walk in, a bright smile on his face. "Did the bath help?"

I nodded while sitting at our kitchen table. "It did, actually. Thank you again."

"Anytime, angel. French toast is almost finished. There's a glass of orange juice and some meds to help with the pain," Noah nodded to the glass and two pills that lay on the table in front of me.

My heart warmed with yet another small but kindest action from him today. After drowning the meds down with half of the orange juice, Noah brought me a plate of steaming hot French toast which I could only eat about half before the cramps made me hiss out in pain.

"Still bad?" he wondered, pushing his empty plate away.

"Yeah, I feel terrible. We had plans to go to the fair with Jesse, but I don't think I can handle walking for hours," I sighed.

Suddenly, Noah's arms pulled me from the chair, and carried me bridal style through the kitchen into the living room where the couch was set up with an array of blankets and pillows, the title screen to my favorite movie on the television.

"What's this?" I asked with a hint of a smile.

As he placed me on the couch and covered me with blankets, he sunk deep next to me, and I wrapped an arm and leg around him. The comfort of the large couch was exactly what I needed in order to deal with this pain.

"This," he pointed to the television. "Is our plans for the rest of the day. If you feel up for it, we can go to the fair tomorrow."

I stared up at him with so much adoration in my eyes that my heart swelled up in two sizes. Everything he had done since the moment I woke up this morning made every single cell in my body vibrate with love; something I'd never thought I'd get from a partner. I was sure if I told someone I was with that I was on my period, the flow heavy and cramps so bad that I could barely move sometimes breath, they would ditch me for the week and come back when I wasn't a mess.

But not Noah. He even changed the sheets this morning when I woke up to the blood staining my pants and the bed. Not once did he turn away in disgust or avoid me? He was what I thought every partner should be for their significant other.

Turning his chin towards me, I placed a firm but quick kiss on his lips, one he had no issue returning.

"I love you," I smiled into the kiss.

Noah brushed his nose over mine. "Anything for you, angel."

[darkenokami]

drawing me and my bf’s sona is very comforting, i love it

[loving08]

Love or Pain

Nicholas leister x reader

summary: Y/N and Nicholas has been best friends since childhood but Y/N started to have feelings for Nick. will she confess her feelings to him or the entry of Noah in their life will change everything??

Part 2

Third person pov:

The next morning Y/N was still asleep when her Mom Y/F/N came to wake her up " Y/N, c'mon its time to wake up sweetheart, I have made your favourite today, french toast and maple syrup. let's go downstairs yours Dad is waiting for you". Y/N wakes up and goes to her bathroom. After freshening up she goes downstairs to join her parents for breakfast.

She started eating when her Dad Y/M/N asked her "How was the party yesterday, didn't had any problems right". Y/N shook her head and said "Yes dad it was good and No we didn't had any problem" her mom came back from the kitchen and asked her "So how was Nick, is he okay?" Y/N didn't want to say what really happened so she said "Maybe, he didn't talked much just said that he will have a hard time adjusting to everything".

Her parents smiled sympathetically and her mom said "Tell him that he is always welcome here, its also his home he can come here whenever he wants". Y/N just nodded her head and they continued eating. Y/N parents had known Nick's parents since college, so both the families were very close. Her parents has always been easy going and she always had thought of them as her friends, she would tell them everything and due to that they also know about her love for Nick. They think that if both of them are happy then they are okay with whatever relation they have between each other.

After finishing breakfast Y/N said "Mom I'm going to get ready and go to Nick's house". Her mom gave her a nod and she goes to her room to get ready. After getting ready she goes to her car and started driving, when she reached Nick's house she saw a car was already parked there, knowing who have already arrived there she goes inside. When she enter, she saw two females with William, Nick's father. William's back was turned towards her so she debated going towards them but when he saw her and called her over she had no choice.

When she reached near them, he introduced her to both the females "Y/N meet Rafaella my wife and Noah her daughter and she is Y/N my son's best friend, basically she is like my daughter". Y/N smiled politely and greeted them "Hey its nice to meet you guys, I have heard so much about you guys from my parents I was dying to meet you both". William smiled at her enthusiasm, he always liked her polite and kind nature for everyone. From the corner of her eyes she saw Nick coming downstairs, she turned towards him with a beaming smile and greeted him "Good morning Boo, hope you had your breakfast properly today". Y/N knows if she doesn't take care of him then he would never pay attention to himself, especially now.

Nick was having a bad start since the morning, starting from his bad headache to his rude awakening in the morning from the alarm clock and meeting his dad's new family. He was just waiting for Y/N to come just so they can leave here, so when he heard her voice he runs out of his room to go downstairs. when he looked at her and her beaming smile for him he relaxed. He knew that just by looking at her, he will be okay and said "Good morning to you too Bee, and yes I ate the breakfast I know you told them to make for me". Y/N just smiled and hugged him when he came closer.

"C'mon let's go, we can't keep Jenna and Mario wait any longer they both are blowing up my phone" Y/N said and they both laughed. William looked at his son when he laughed and smiled to himself, he knows that after his late wife's death they both have been drifted apart but he is thankful to Y/N and her parents. Whenever she would be around Nicholas, he would laugh or would have small smile in his face. William is happy that there are people for Nick when he needed someone. As Y/N and Nick started to leave, William walked them to the door and watched until their car disappear and he return inside.

In the car soft music was playing and Y/N was sitting at the passenger sit while Nick was driving. She was looking outside when she felt his eyes on her turned herself to face him, with one eyebrow raised she asked " what is it?? is something on my face?" Nick laughed and said "No, no Bee there is nothing on your face", "what is it then" Y/N asked. They reached the cafe they were to meet their friends and Nick parked the car and turned to looked at her.

"Its just.. I.. feel very lucky to have you by my side, you always make my day better and I just wanted you to know that" Nick said, Y/N smiled at him and gently brushed his hair and said "you don't have to tell me all this Nick I know how much you appreciate me, you don't have to tell me all the time, okay" Nick nodded his head and smiled at her. Y/N shook her head, a smile still attached to her face and said " c'mon, let's go and meet them" and they both gets out of the car goes inside the cafe.

Part 3

[roosterforme]

The Younger Kind Part 22 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: Now that Bradley has you with him, he never wants you to go. But the stress from Meredith and Penny still hangs between the two of you. And the only think that seems to make sense to Bradley could be taken from him.

Warnings: Angst, swearing, smut, fluff, and age gap (18+)

Length: 4800 words

Pairing: Single dad!Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x babysitter!female reader

Check out my masterlist for more!

You were finally in Bradley's arms. Aside from your hangover and banged up knee, you seemed no worse for the wear. Just a little shaken up from those assholes taunting you last night. As he leaned back against his headboard, you were curled up against his chest wearing his favorite sweatshirt. 

"I love you," he whispered again, rubbing the bare skin of your back and waist beneath the sweatshirt. You hadn't returned the sentiment, but it didn't matter. You just snuggled a little closer to him every time he said it to you. 

When your stomach growled, you looked up at him and laughed softly. "Come on," he said, kissing your forehead as he withdrew his hand from your soft skin. "I'll make you breakfast."

Now you were looking at him with concern as you straddled his thighs. "You'll make me breakfast? Sorry, but I'm not going to eat anything you cook."

Bradley tipped his head back and started laughing. "You got me there, Princess. But I can get you a bowl of cereal."

You just shook your head and slid off of his lap, taking his hand in yours. "I'll make you breakfast," you told him, looking back at him over your shoulder as he followed you down the hallway. He'd follow you anywhere today. Do anything you wanted to do. As long as you kept him with you.

He turned on the coffee maker and pulled two mugs down as you bent in front of the refrigerator. Your bare legs and his oversized sweatshirt made him feel weak. You handed him some eggs and the gallon jug of milk. "Do you have cinnamon?" you asked as he set the milk and eggs on the counter. 

"You don't actually have to make me breakfast," he whispered as you kissed his chin. 

"I'm hungry for French toast," you told him, so he located the cinnamon for you. Then he watched you work, helping with everything you asked him to. And when the kitchen smelled like cinnamon, and there were slices of bread sizzling on the stovetop, Bradley handed you a mug of coffee. 

"Can you help me with something on my phone?" he asked softly, wrapping his arms around you from behind as you sipped your coffee and flipped a piece of bread. 

You set down the mug that said Aviators Look Down on Others and glared at him over your shoulder. "If you ask me to delete another dating app, I will rage. Do you understand me?"

"It's not that," he promised.

"Well, then what can I help you with, old man?"

Bradley couldn't help but smile at your words as he ran his mustache along the side of your neck. "Help me change this." He tapped on your contact name which was still listed as Babysitter. He deleted that word as he let his chin rest on your shoulder, making sure you were looking at his phone. Then he typed out My Princess before he opened his photo gallery. 

"It doesn't look like you need my help," you whispered as he scrolled through all of his pictures of you and Noah and the occasional one related to something at work. "Oh wait, yes you do," you said, pointing to the dirty pictures you had sent him. "You need to save those in a private folder, Daddy."

He was beyond delighted that you had just called him Daddy. "That's something else you can help me with," he murmured, scrolling further until he found the first selfie you sent to him. The one where you were wearing your purple crown. He set it at your contact photo and kissed your cheek

"Give me that," you told him after you flipped the pieces of French toast again. He handed you his phone and watched you move all the dirty photos he loved so much into a new folder that you labeled Princess. "And you can enter the passcode when you want to look at them," you said as you saved today's date as the four digit code.

"Why did you make it today's date?" he asked as you spun to face him and pressed his phone to his chest. He grabbed it as you let go and wrapped your arms around his neck. You kissed him hard, devouring his mouth as you sighed softly. Bradley tossed his phone onto the counter next to the mugs and let his hands slide up your sides beneath his soft sweatshirt. 

"Because," you told him between kisses, running your fingers up into his hair and looking him in the eye. "Today's the day you told me you love me."

"Baby," he moaned against your lips, reaching behind you to turn off the stove burners. 

You kept your body snug against his, even when you let your hands trail down to the bottom of his undershirt and whispered, "Daddy."

You peeled his shirt off, finally letting him feel your hands everywhere. "Please. Let me take you back to bed." He had never been intimate with you there, but he'd been dreaming about it for a long time. Hell, last night was the first time you and he had a real sleepover. The first time he got to hold you all night.

Immediately you started pushing him toward the hallway, and he hoisted you up into his arms as you squeaked. "I got you," he promised.

-------------------------

There had to be something wrong with you, because you couldn't physically stop smiling. Bradley had taken you to his bed, set you down gently right in the middle of it, and started kissing you everywhere. His sweatshirt was pushed up to your breasts, his big hands squeezing your sides while he kissed the spot just below your belly button.

You were panting softly, and you could tell how wet you were by the way your lace underwear clung to you. But he seemed to be in no hurry, so you just let him keep it up. Lips and mustache found your injured knee, and he kissed all around the bandage before gently guiding your leg over his shoulder. 

"I've been dreaming about this," he whispered against your inner thigh. When his fingers teased along the elastic of your underwear, you thought he was going to remove them, but he just kept driving you crazy instead. 

A soft laugh bubbled out of your lips. "You dreamed about rescuing me from frat boys and having your way with me?"

"No," he grunted, easing his large body over yours, while you kept your leg on his shoulder. You could feel his hard cock rub your core through both of your underwear, and you pressed up against him. "I dream about having you in my bed. Having you all to myself. Don't get me wrong, I love sharing you with Noah," he mumbled, pushing the sweatshirt up and palming your tits with his massive hands. "But when you're like this, you're all mine."

As your back arched off the bed, Bradley's lips met your nipple, kissing and caressing you like nobody else ever had. "Daddy," you whispered before your eyes fluttered closed. 

"All mine," he muttered, licking the valley between your breasts before sucking on one nipple and then the other.

You cried out for him, your hands grabbing at his biceps and shoulders before threading through his messy curls. 

"You're so fucking sensitive, Princess."

You definitely were for him. Because he knew how to touch you. He knew how to love you. He was good at all of it. 

"Bradley?" you gasped after he had worked your nipples into tender peaks. He whispered your name, the bristles of his mustache rubbing you just right. You were clenching around nothing. He hadn't even undressed you yet. And now you were in trouble, because he could tell how far gone you were as he whispered your name over and over again.

You rubbed yourself up against his cock as he pressed his lips to your ear and moaned, "I love you, Princess. I love you."

There was little doubt in your mind that you could cum for him just like this. He loved you. And you loved him.

You were soaking wet as he slipped his hand inside your underwear and groaned. "You make me insane," he informed you gruffly, wasting no time before slipping his middle finger inside you. 

"Bradley!" you cried as he stroked your clit with his thumb and fucked you with one, thick digit until you were propping yourself up on your elbows to get to his lips. You kissed him, and he devoured every noise you made. "I'm so close, Daddy." When you let your head tip back, his mouth found your breasts again. You were close to overstimulation as he removed his finger from inside you and rubbed his fingertips across your clit until you were nearly crying. 

It took you a second to realize that your legs were shaking as he sucked on your breasts. You were about to cum as soft grunts mixed with your deep, erratic breathing. "Oh," you gasped, and then he was mashing his lips to yours, pushing you back against the pillow. "I'm coming," you whined into his mouth. 

Then you were shaking everywhere, his fingers slowing down and applying less pressure until you moaned his name so loudly, you should have been embarrassed. Your panties were absolutely soaked, and it felt like you were laying in a puddle as Bradley tapped your clit with his fingertips. 

When you met his eyes and saw the desire there, you knew what had happened. "Did I squirt again?" you asked softly as you caught your breath. Bradley brought his damp hand up to his own mouth and licked his palm before running his index finger along your lips. 

"You did," he whispered, letting you kitten lick his fingers. You tasted good on his warm skin, and you were no longer embarrassed. Because he looked so turned on right now. You could see his cock straining against the fabric of his underwear, could feel him pulsing against you. When you sucked two of his fingers into your mouth, he started bucking against you, and you looked up at him.

"Don't look at me like that," he rasped, pushing them a little further into your mouth. "You already know you own me."

You moaned around his fingers before he pulled them free and kissed you. Then his sweatshirt was on the floor along with your soaking wet underwear. You watched the graceful way he removed his own underwear as you sat up. 

"Come here," you commanded, and he did as he was told, kissing you and wrapping his arms around you. You told him where to touch you, and he did. You told him everything you wanted, and he did that too. You were already a mess again as his thigh rubbed your core. Already whimpering his name.

"You gonna let me make love to you, Princess?" he asked, spreading your legs a little wider and coaxing you flat on your back. 

"Yes," you whispered when you felt him at your entrance. 

"A little louder," he said, pressing against you with delicious pressure.

"Yes!"

He was steady and meticulous, sure that you liked everything he was doing before he went a little harder. He checked in with you until you could barely answer him, because everything felt too good. Your fingers were digging into his biceps as your lips skimmed along his neck, licking at the salty sheen on his skin. He was chanting your name like a prayer as he moved with such precision, you weren't sure you'd ever be able to orgasm without him again.

Bradley was loving your body with his. He chased your lips for more kisses every time you needed to take a breath. His rough hands were so sure of what you needed as he touched you seemingly everywhere. And interspersed among the sweet sound of your name, he told you he loved you. He used his voice like a tool in tandem with his perfect body until you were squeezing his cock tight.

You felt wrung out and exhausted, barely able to control yourself as your fingers went loose on his arms. You sunk back in the bed, keening for him as your orgasm washed over and through you. And then you watched him, neck straining as his strokes grew shorter and more irregular. You pulled his mouth to yours as he came for you. He tasted so good as he let his hand gently grip the back of your neck, his thumb stroking your jaw. 

"I love you," he breathed against your lips. His voice sounded as broken as you felt as he collapsed mostly on top of you. You held him close with your hands in his hair, and his cock still buried inside you.

"I love you, Daddy."

---------------------------

Bradley smiled the whole time you and he argued about doing laundry. You were adamant that he wash your underwear along with the bedding, but he kept telling you he liked the way they looked on his bedroom floor too much to do that. 

Finally you scooped them up and said, "I'm sure if you really want to, we can soak them again," and then took them and his bedding into your arms. "It's not like you don't know how to make me squirt."

Then he watched you parade out of his room, your naked backside swaying beautifully as you went. He just stood there and exhaled as he ran his hands through his hair. He was certain he had the dumbest look on his face. 

You loved him.

"Good thing I like cold French toast," you said with a laugh as he sat down completely naked on one of the kitchen chairs. You were also naked, plating some breakfast which was definitely becoming lunch. 

"I like anything you cook," he mumbled, eyes glued to every inch of your body as you turned and set down a plate in front of him along with maple syrup and two glasses of orange juice. "Mind grabbing my phone?" he asked, watching as you picked it up from where he discarded it earlier. 

"Here you go, old man," you said quite loudly. "Can you hear me? Do you remember your pass codes? Or do you need a refresher?"

"You know, I have a bag of Skittles for you, but I think I'll just eat all of them," he said, pulling you down onto his lap and opening up a playlist on his phone. 

"You would never," you gasped. Bradley was laughing, but you actually seemed scandalized.

"No, I wouldn't," he promised, kissing your shoulder as you settled back against him. He played his favorite song, the one that reminded him of you while you cut up the French toast and drenched it in syrup. 

Bradley watched you lick some syrup from your fingertip as you said, "I made a playlist for Noah. A bunch of kid friendly songs. He loved it." You took a bite of food and turned to smile at him while you chewed. 

"That was sweet of you," he rasped as you fed him a bite. "He's crazy about you." Bradley thought back to Noah crying and saying he wanted you to be his mommy. 

"I love him," you said simply, taking another bite of French toast while Bradley wrapped his hands around your waist and caressed your soft skin. 

And it didn't take long until the food was eaten and you were straddling his lap on the chair. You were cradling his hard cock against your pussy while you kissed his neck and dragged your purple fingernails down his chest and along his abs.

"Feels good," he groaned, trying to sit still and enjoy everything you were doing to him. You looked gorgeous everywhere. Every tilt of your head and brush of your lips against his skin had all of his senses screaming for more. When you finally lifted your hips up and let him slip inside you, he was so far gone. You rode him so well with your arms around his neck and your fingers trailing through his hair.

"Oh," you gasped, eyes fluttering closed as you rubbed your clit against his abs. 

"You're so good, Baby," he promised, one hand guiding your hip and the other tracing your nipples. You were a dream. Everything he wanted. Perfect for him. Perfect for Noah. 

You leaned closer and kissed his lips, getting louder with each stroke of your clit against him. And soon you were whining his name and pulling his hair. He filled you with his cum that dripped all over the chair and coated your thighs when you stood. 

He just looked at you there, standing between his splayed thighs with your hands on his shoulders. "I never want to stop being with you," he mumbled, and you leaned down to kiss him.

------------------------

You were a little embarrassed to admit to Bradley that when you got out of the shower, you wanted to take an afternoon nap. After you spent a few minutes picking on him for being old and drinking fiber in his tea with lunch, you yawned so long and loud that he led you to the living room. You were in his soft UVA sweatshirt again, and you stretched out on the couch with your head on his lap. 

The last few days had been wild. You vowed that you were never going to speak to Greyson or his friends again. No more college boys in any way, shape or form. Nobody but Bradley. 

He was currently drawing tiny circles along your neck with his fingertips. You yawned again before you whispered, "You know, I probably shouldn't even be here right now."

He just hummed in response, so you asked, "Where are things at with Meredith? Still scheduled for Wednesday?"

But Bradley was silent for a moment before he said, "I don't want you to have to worry about her. I'm doing enough worrying for all three of us. But yes, Wednesday. Unless Tracy calls and tells me otherwise."

"I'm still going to worry, Daddy. But I'm also going to support you. Noah needs to be with you. He needs his dad who took care of him and loves him. He needs to stay with you."

But those little circles on your neck and his rough fingertips had you drifting off to sleep, and you sensed that was what he wanted. He seemed reluctant to let you be consumed by this. So you slept for a few hours on his warm thigh, only stirring when you really needed to go to the bathroom. He hadn't moved at all, but his hand was resting on your bare hip, and he was watching sports highlights on mute on the TV with the captions turned on.

"Baby," he murmured when you popped your head up and turned to look at him. So handsome. You climbed onto his lap and rested your head against his shoulder. He kissed your forehead and told you, "Penny's bringing Noah back in about an hour."

Your heart soared. That would give you enough time to cook something for him for dinner, and then you could play with him a bit before his bedtime. Before you had to leave. And then your heart sank, because you didn't want to go home. And you didn't want to see Penny. You were still so upset about what happened when Bradley got blindsided by Helen.

"I'll be back," you whispered, standing and heading for the bathroom. You took a few minutes to yourself. There was too much going on. And you thought that if you could sort everything out without Bradley distracting you with his hands and his lips you could make more sense of things. 

You wanted to be here when Penny dropped Noah off. You didn't want to hide what was going on. You wanted to stay and have dinner with your boys. You deserved that much. 

You wanted to help Bradley with Meredith. If there was some way you could aid in court or help him prepare, you wanted to do that. He deserved that much. And Noah deserved everything. 

You sighed and washed your hands, and when you opened the door, Bradley was standing there. "I just remade the bed, and I'd love to spend some time snuggling with you." 

You went with him and curled up against his huge body. He held you close and asked, "When is your graduation? I need to make sure Noah and I can be there."

The first thing that popped into your mind was the scary thought that maybe Bradley wouldn't be the one making plans for his son much longer, but you squashed it immediately. "I'll add it to your phone calendar since I assume you're too old to figure out how to do that," you replied, kissing the tip of his nose. 

He smirked and squeezed your butt so that you were smiling. "I appreciate that, distressingly young girlfriend."

You gasped. "Is that what I am? I thought you said no titles."

"You're my girlfriend," he said with a nod. "Just deal with it, okay? It's been only you for a while now. Your crown lives on my bedpost. I haven't had any other partners. Noah and I are in love with you. You're my girlfriend. My Princess."

You couldn't stop the smile from taking over your face. "Technically I'm Noah's Princess, too."

He sighed and studied your face. "I'm hoping you'll be more than that someday. Now let me put some real clothing on before Penny gets here." With a kiss to your cheek, Bradley grunted and climbed out of bed. You watched his body as he pulled on a US Navy tee shirt and a pair of gray sweatpants. 

"Okay, what are you doing?" you asked, crawling across the bed toward him.

He gave you a funny look. "Getting...dressed?"

"No." You pulled him closer by the drawstring on his pants. "As your girlfriend, I'm telling you that you can't wear gray sweatpants around anyone except me. Or like maybe your doctor or something. Because even with underwear, I can see the outline of your dick. It's delicious looking, but no, Daddy."

He blushed. He actually blushed. And you smirked as he yanked them back off again and tossed them at your face. "You wear them, then." You laughed as he pulled on some jeans, complaining the entire time. Then you got out of bed and stepped into his sweatpants. You were sure you looked ridiculous in his too large sweatpants and sweatshirt, but you had nothing else to wear, so you rolled the pants at the waist. 

And then the doorbell rang. And now you actually weren't sure that Bradley would want Penny to see you here. You were about to ask him if that was the case, but he took you by the hand. 

"Noah is going to be so excited that I didn't completely fuck things up with you." He pulled you down the hallway and toward the front door, and before you knew it, Noah and Penny were right in front of you. When he saw you, his face lit up, and he started trying to wiggle out of Penny's arms. 

"Princess!"

You scooped him up as Penny laughed and handed Bradley a bag. "Here's some artwork that we made today. Plus some dirty laundry. We had so much fun making macaroni art with Amelia."

She smiled at you. She didn't look surprised to see you at all as you hugged Noah and kissed his round cheek. 

"Thanks, Pen," Bradley mumbled, digging through the bag. 

"No need to thank me," she replied, wringing her hands nervously now. "I owe you an apology." She was talking to you. Your eyes went a little wide. "I didn't know the two of you were together. If I had known, I would have never tried to set Bradley up. I really shouldn't have done it anyway," she added softly. 

You turned to look up at Bradley. "You told her about us?"

"Yes," he replied, slipping his arm around your shoulders and kissing his son on the head. "Of course I did."

"I should have known, honestly," Penny said, looking at Bradley with a smile. "By the way he said he wasn't using the dating app. And how he seemed calmer. More grounded."

Your cheeks felt warm as you pressed your lips together. "Do you want to stay for dinner?" you asked. "I'm making spaghetti."

"Spaghetti!" Noah cheered, but Penny shook her head. "I need to pick Amelia up from her friend's house. But thank you." And then she was kissing Bradley's cheek and closing the door as she left.

You were alone with your boys. This was all you'd been dreaming about recently. Noah's arms were around your neck, and Bradley was guiding you toward the kitchen, and you had tears in your eyes. 

"I love you," Noah whispered, and then you started crying. 

"I love you, too, sweet Noah."

---------------------------

Bradley watched you tuck Noah into bed. You looked so good in his clothing and in his house. You looked perfect when you were with his son. He needed this to be his everyday life. 

You joined him in the hallway and whispered, "I'll get an Uber to take me home if you don't mind me borrowing your clothes."

"Stay," he replied softly. "Please, stay."

You bit your lip and started to slowly shake your head. "Tomorrow is Monday. You have work. I should go to campus and start on my job applications and final few assignments."

"You can do that from here. Use my computer. Please, stay."

You hummed softly. He would be more than happy to beg you not to leave, but you took him by the hand and kissed his wrist. "Okay. I'll stay. Leave me your computer and charger."

Then you turned toward his bedroom, pulling his sweatshirt over your head as you went. "Are you coming?" you asked him over your shoulder. He could see the silhouette of your peaked nipple in the dimly lit space, and he tripped along after you. 

"I'm coming, Baby," he rasped, and your soft giggle as you climbed into his bed had him reaching for you. The room was dark, and his eyes hadn't adjusted yet, but your voice alone was making him hard.

"Come get me, Daddy."

He grunted and slipped his hand down the front of the sweatpants, and you gasped. He took his time. He made sure you were reacting just the way he wanted you to. And when he had you close, he asked, "Does anyone else make you feel as good as Daddy does?"

Your moan was so loud in the silent house that he had to cover your mouth with his. "No," you panted. "No." 

Then he flipped you over onto your knees and yanked the sweatpants down. "Good girl," he whispered, burying his face in your pussy from behind. 

"Daddy," you whined, and Bradley had to push your face down to the pillow to keep you quiet. With your ass in the air, he finished you off as you gushed a bit for him. 

"Fucking hell," he growled as he lapped at your pussy and unzipped his jeans, pulling himself free. With one clean movement, he was buried deep, bottoming out inside you. "Soaking wet." His face was tipped back, staring at the ceiling, trying to keep his composure. 

"Daddy!" you whined, bumping back against him harder, and that was it.

"Not too loud, Baby," he warned, wrapping one hand over your mouth and planting one hand on the bed. He pressed himself against your back and whispered in your ear, "You want Daddy to be sweet or rough?"

"Rough," you whimpered against his fingers before he shoved them in your mouth and slammed into you until he was seeing stars. You were a whimpering mess as Bradley filled you over and over again, and then he came so hard, he was afraid he was going to hurt you. But you seemed fine as he collapsed on top of your back. 

"You okay?" he asked, panting like he'd just run five miles. 

"Yes," you gasped softly. "So good."

"Will you let me fuck you like a sweet princess tomorrow?" 

You moaned softly. "Whenever you want."

He kissed along your neck and grunted. "Daddy needs a good night's sleep, Baby. Tomorrow."

And not ten minutes later, Bradley was sound asleep as you ran your fingers along his chest and told him you loved him. He never wanted you to leave.

-------------------------

Bradley is always in a much better headspace when he's with his little family. Don't worry, Meredith is on deck! Hope you enjoy your fic, @beyondthesefourwalls And thank you @mak-32 !

PART 23

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[treacheryinblue]

Chapter 5/?

× Elysium (noun) : a place or condition of ideal happiness. type of: fictitious place, imaginary place, mythical place.

Word Count: 8.1k

Masterlist

A Noah Sebastian x OC Series

× Summary: Noah and his new found (sort of) friend, Persephone, battle the trivial ins and outs of being teenagers in a world that doesn't accept you. They survive together all the way into adulthood - with bouts of loneliness included - where the world is still a fickle bitch.

× Warnings!: smut (chapter 4 and beyond), language, violence, slowburn, friends to lovers to enemies back to friends, rinse and repeat (not even in that order), sexual themes, etc. Each chapter will have its own set of separate warnings.

× Author Notes: ( 1 ) I'm sorry that this took so long! I had majority written for awhile but it just didn't feel right. I'm not even sure if it finally does but I'm going with it!

× Chapter Warnings!: smut (oral - m receiving), language, talks of mental illness, drinking.

Happy reading! xoxo

SPRING 2016

PERSEPHONE

“What are you doing?”

Noah yawned out his words as he stirred in bed, an inked hand lifting to scratch at his chest. She didn't even look up from the little comic-like scene she had been doodling - this being what she had chosen to throw herself into hours ago when she couldn't sleep and needed a distraction. 

Sleep. What a foreign thing that was to her nowadays. It infuriated her beyond belief, much more than anyone around her could've guessed. Seph had taken to not talking much about the issues she was having because she knew Noah would only fixate on them and try to help. And while she appreciated his attempts, she couldn't stop herself from wondering if they were doing more harm than good. 

Maybe their lack of full on intimacy didn't sound like a huge deal, but to her, it was making her lose her mind. Although, not because she was aching for it (even if she was); this was more so due to all the thoughts it was causing her to have. The worries. The overthinking. It was becoming almost unbearable up in her brain. 

“Hmm?” Noah hummed curiously when she didn't yet give a response. 

“Just some drawing.” 

Seph allowed her eyes to flicker up to him, a slight smile being forced across her lips. She was sure he wouldn't believe it, but she didn't have it in her to dwell on that right then. 

“Did you have breakfast?”

Jesus fucking Christ. Why couldn't he ever stop? 

It's not his fault. Don't take it out on him. 

“Yeah, I made some peanut butter toast awhile ago.”

A small lie, although not completely. She had made said toast, but unfortunately, she only took a single bite of it before the texture assaulted her senses and she had to swallow it down with the help of a leftover Sprite in the fridge. No idea who it belonged to, but it was flat as hell. 

Noah nodded, again yawning as he shifted onto his side to face her. A long arm snaked around her waist and gave a firm tug, forcing her to set her sketchbook aside so she could be pulled into his warmth without issue. Now that his chest was pressed into her back, he nuzzled into the crook of her neck and released a sigh of content. 

If only she could feel as carefree as he did right then. 

“You okay?” 

“Yeah, I'm good,” she softly spoke, fingertips trailing along the top of his hand that closed around her. 

“Just tired because I didn't sleep well.” Seph elaborated a bit, just so Noah wouldn't further worry about her. If she blamed it all on being tired, then there would be no issue, right? 

“I’m sorry,” he murmured against her skin. 

“We gotta shoot that video today, so I'll be gone for a bit. Did you want to come?”

Aka 'do you need a babysitter?’

Seph forced those thoughts to pause. She couldn't assume this is what Noah meant all because he was asking if she wanted to tag along. Who's to say he didn't actually want her there? 

Adjusting within his arms, she angled herself back a bit so she could see his face. She then smiled and shook her head, just before placing a light kiss to his awaiting mouth. Morning Noah was always the most adorable to her. His heavy lidded eyes and pouty lips were something she could stare at all day if given the option. 

“I have therapy, so I can't. You need some time with the guys without me cramping your style, anyway.” 

Noah rolled his eyes and tightened the hold he had on her body, his face then burying back into her neck where he began to lightly kiss a couple of times. 

“You give us our style. You know that.” 

Slender fingers slithered along her side, dropping over the curve of her hip before managing to slip beneath the fabric of the t-shirt she wore. Noah rubbed gentle circles into her skin, this soft sensation causing her eyes to flutter closed and her lips to part to allow a small exhale through. 

No, she couldn't let herself fall victim to this again because she knew exactly how it would end. Since Noah struggled to keep his hands off of her, he would either continue to caress her body until she made the move to progress further, which he would reject in his own way. Or he would sink his fingers between her thighs, quickly get her off, then carry on as if he wasn't hard and pressed into her lower back. 

While the latter option sounded far better, both actually sucked. 

“Is everyone coming back here tonight?” She figured changing the subject and focusing on something else would help distract not only her mind, but also those damned fingers of his. 

Noah made a small sound that told her yes, nodding slightly. 

“It'll be another not so chill night.”

There was a disdain in his voice that she hadn't been expecting. Did he not like when everyone piled into his shared place for a night of drinking and nonsense? 

Reaching for his hand to stop him from taking things further, she laced their fingers together and folded their now intertwined digits into her chest. 

“At least you'll have me there,” she shrugged. 

× × ×

“Persephone…if we adjust your medications again, this will be the third time within a year. In my professional opinion, I don't think you're really giving them a chance.”

Professional. Right. What a jackass. 

This was the statement that finally broke her that day. Her shoulders dropped and her head bowed, heavy sobs immediately beginning to escape her. A hand lifted to cover her mouth in an attempt to muffle the sounds, though she knew the older man wasn't so blind that he hadn't witnessed her oncoming break. 

“You don't get it. No one gets it.” She choked out while tugging down the sleeve of her (Noah’s) hoodie so she could wipe beneath her nose. 

“I hate the way all of the meds have made me. I'm not myself. I don't feel normal. I mean…who I was before wasn't so great, considering, but at least then I felt something that wasn't just…emptiness and anger and this sadness that's been eating away at me.”

Trembling hands cradled her face after dropping it into her palms, the tears not yet ceasing. It felt like a dam had broken within her - or maybe it was just a patch. Something told her this wasn't the breakdown she had brewing inside.

“I can't eat. I can't sleep. I can't even enjoy my time with the guy I fucking lo-” she paused before finishing the sentence, cutting herself off with a shake of her head. 

Nope. She wasn't going to admit that for the first time to her goddamn therapist. 

Seph took in a deep breath as she wiped the tears from beneath her eyes. She was hoping she could get herself together now, though mostly because she didn't want to return to the public with red and puffy eyes. 

“Maybe I'm just better without the meds. Is that an option? Things in my life are different now, right? So maybe the changes will help me stay level headed. I just need to feel like myself again.” 

“No.” The man was quick to respond. “Stopping medications abruptly is never suggested and you know this. It could make your negative feelings worse, as well as become more physical ailments, too.”

He deeply sighed as he looked at her across the room. It was clear to her that he was at a loss for words, though she wasn't surprised. It's the same expression she received time and time again from every therapist who was unlucky enough to have her land in their lap. Seph knew she wasn't that much of a handful, especially not in comparison to other people in the world. She was just…frustrating. Possibly even incapable of receiving help because she wasn't willing to open up to it. Or whatever the fuck her last therapist had told her parents. 

It was all bullshit either way. 

× × ×

Against her therapist’s better judgment, and possibly even her own, Seph had decided on her way back to Noah's after her appointment that she was going to put her medications to rest. She wasn't going to be so irresponsible as to quit them cold turkey, but tapering herself off was definitely in the works. Any of the effects she may experience couldn't be nearly as bad as how she was currently feeling on a day to day basis. This is what she told herself to justify the decision. 

Merely having put this plan into action was already lifting her spirits. She felt happier, lighter in her steps. Maybe even excited for the night that lied ahead? While parties used to be her cup of tea, it should come as no surprise that she wasn't as lively at them as she once had been. 

Not this time. She thought to herself while getting ready that evening. She was going to be the old Seph that night even if it killed her. 

High waisted shorts that were cut entirely too short in the back? Check. Random t-shirt of Noah’s that she had tied and tucked up at her waist? Check. Secret vodka shots that were taken before the guys arrived back? Double check. 

“You seem to be in a good mood.” Noah mused as he approached her a little later that night. “Therapy go well?”

Seph peered up at him, a grin manifesting over her lips. She assumed he didn't think anything of the cup in her hand that was a mixture of fruit punch and vodka, since the red juice was typically being had by her during any of their parties. Why would he suspect the second ingredient now? 

“It was fine, but we can talk about it tomorrow.” A wave of her hand brushed the topic away. She didn't want to dwell on something like that right then when she was supposed to be having fun, especially when she knew telling Noah about her session and her decision afterwards would put a stop to all the said fun. 

With her cup clutched securely in her hand, she took a step closer to Noah so her arms could link around his waist. Her body pressed firm into his now that her head angled up and her chin could prop against his chest, just so she could get a clear view of his face. 

“What are you doing?” Noah chuckled, a hand of his own rubbing along her back so she knew her sudden affection was welcomed despite the people. 

“Nothin’, I just missed you.” 

Wasn't it funny how she had once been worried about what people would think of her for cozying up with someone like Noah? And now, not only could she not care less about what others thought, she was actually pretty happy to be with him. 

When happiness could be felt. 

Not to mention the night and day difference Noah was to Mason. Her ex would always act embarrassed when she was a little more affectionate and craving his attention, even more so when others were around. But Noah? He leaned into it and gave it right back, sometimes tenfold. 

“How was the video shoot?” 

“Uh…” Noah shrugged, his other hand bringing his beer up for a swallow as the one still caressed along her back. “It went okay. Some creative differences but that's to be expected.” 

At this point in their relationship, Seph believed she knew Noah pretty well. She could tell when he was lying, or at least withholding things from her, and this was one of those times. Not even her vodka goggles could make her blind to it. 

“That doesn't sound too good…” The words were mumbled against his mouth after she had pushed up onto her tip toes to press her lips to his. While the initial kiss only lasted a second or so, Seph couldn't stop herself from leaning in for another, this one lingering for longer. 

How could it not when he always tasted so damn good? Still, she made a mental note to ask him more about the video shoot later. 

“Hey! We're gearing up for beer pong!” 

Folio’s voice cut through the little bubble they had placed themselves in which unfortunately forced Noah to pull back from her a bit. He looked off to the side where his bandmate was shuffling away, giving him a nod and a wave of his hand as a signal that he understood. 

Seph huffed, the pout obvious on her lips from the lack of connection. She so badly wanted to be as close as humanly possible to him, more so than usual. It was hard to tell if Noah shared the same desire, though. Things had been so off with him lately, as well as herself, that it was impossible to know for sure. Obviously she had yet to take Nick’s advice and actually talk to Noah about it. 

“I'm gonna run to the bathroom and then we're getting in on that game.” Noah tilted his head back to finish off what remained of his beer. 

“You're on my team, by the way, since you're oddly good at it…” 

Eying her suspiciously, Noah began to take slow steps backwards until her hand slipped from his. Seph could only laugh and roll her eyes at him, knowing damn well she had explained to him before that she had been playing beer pong almost religiously since she was thirteen. So, of course she was good at it. 

Once he rounded the corner down the hallway, she took in a deep breath, her smile falling. Her frustrations were really beginning to grow and that worried her. How much longer until she outright exploded? 

Goddammit. She couldn't keep letting her inner most thoughts drift to these things. This was supposed to be her fun night. Not her 'dwell on whether or not Noah is over me’ night. 

With pursed lips she glanced in the direction of the hallway he had sauntered down mere seconds ago. No…she shouldn't…right? 

Seph refused to think about it for too long. After all, she had vowed to act like her old self. The version of her that was all for taking chances and doing things that were probably pretty dumb. This little idea definitely fit the criteria. 

After finishing off the remnants of her drink, she found herself following the same path Noah had taken. It was mostly empty in this area of the house now because the other party-goers were either outside or joining in on the commotion in the kitchen and dining room. As she approached the bathroom, she heard the toilet flush and then the sink turn on, which didn't give her much time to back out if she chose to. 

Oh, hell. Why was she so nervous anyway? Noah was basically her boyfriend (relationship defining conversation still pending) and this is the sort of thing they did. What's the worst that could happen?  

Well…he could completely reject her…that was always likely…

Thankfully, the bathroom door opened before she could think any harder on that pesky thought. Noah appeared slightly shocked to see her standing there, though she barely had time to register his expression shift before she was closing the space between them and pushing him back into the bathroom with the force of her body colliding with his. 

“Seph-”

She cut him off after nudging the door closed with her elbow, a hand grabbing the back of his head and pulling his lips down to hers. His own hands were quick to find her waist, firmly clutching at her bare skin and pulling her in closer against him. 

Good. This was the sort of reaction she was looking for. 

Seph tightly grasped his hair between her fingers as she moaned into the kiss, letting him know exactly what she was angling towards. Noah seemed to be accepting of it by the way he guided her back into the wall and then used a singular hand to pin her wrists up above her head. She could already feel the bulge beginning to form in his jeans - and this made her so ecstatic that she barely knew how to contain herself. 

Fuck, she just knew she was about to cum so hard. 

“I don't know what's gotten into you…” he breathed across her skin while biting a trail down her jaw and neck, his free hand dragging along her waist. “But it's fucking hot.” 

Noah pressed himself between her thighs and tightened the grip he had on her wrists, though only for a brief moment before releasing them. Oh, so he found it hot when she took the lead? Noted. 

“Only thing I need getting into me right now is your dick.” 

Seph didn't care how ridiculous that sounded because not only was her brain foggy with only her desire for Noah, but she was also pretty buzzed from the shots and her mixed drink. Not drinking for a year was really getting the best of her. 

The moment her hands were free, they dropped to begin working on the irritating button and zipper of his jeans. Her lips worked skillfully over his as they engaged in another heated kiss; tongues massaged together, moans mixing, both of their primal needs for the other heightening in sync. Noah’s hands were in her hair and then feeling along her body, grabbing and touching at every bit of her that he could. She didn't even care when he drunkenly pulled too hard on her necklace by accident, almost ripping it off in the process. Thankfully the chain remained secure. 

“I knew you'd be hard for me already…” she taunted after slipping her fingers beneath the band of his boxers and feeling for herself just how hard he actually was. The answer: hard enough for his cock to pulse at the first graze of her fingers. 

A few steps forward and she had backed him up to the counter, all while she simultaneously pushed his boxers down and tugged his cock free. Seph looked up at him with a devilish smirk as her thumb grazed along the tip, this slight motion causing his hips to jerk forward and his hands to clutch the counter tight enough that his knuckles turned white. 

“Fuck,” Noah groaned. The sound of his breathing was already picking up despite her having just secured her fingers around his thick cock, slowly pumping along every inch. 

It was the expressions he made that she really liked watching - which now helped her realize why Noah also liked looking up at her as he was eating her out. Being able to see the other person coming undone more and more with every passing second was euphoric all on its own. His eyes closed and his jaw clenched, lips briefly folding in before another moan erupted from his chest. Of course just her simply jerking him off was going to be a show for her - it had been forever since he let her even touch him below the waist last. 

Seph picked up her pace, the grip she had tightening every time her hand would twist up towards the top. She noticed how he was trying his best to stop himself from thrusting forward into her palm, and while she wanted to call him out for it, she decided against it because she knew he wouldn't be able to hold back once she was on her knees. 

Speaking of - that's exactly where she had ended up. 

Heavy lidded eyes stared down at her now, his fingers helping with moving her hair out of her face and gathering it back in a makeshift ponytail. Seph smiled up at him just as she gripped the base of his cock and secured her plump lips around the tip, her tongue swirling around and gathering the bead of moisture that had already appeared. 

Noah did a sharp inhale, and she could feel the way his body tensed while she had him in such a vulnerable position. Since she didn't get to blow him often, she definitely liked to make the most of it. After taking in a deep breath of her own through her nose, her tongue laid against the underside of his cock, her head beginning its tortuously slow bob to take him in inch by inch. 

“Goddamn, Seph,” Noah cursed above her, “your mouth…”

There was no way he was able to finish the statement once she was swallowing his cock down at a faster pace, bringing him as far back to her throat as she could. Her new motions quite the contrast to how she had just been teasing him only seconds ago. Noah’s grip of her hair tightened so he could help guide her, a bit of force being applied in an attempt to push her deeper. 

“Lift your shirt up,” he then demanded, which she quickly obeyed by hauling the t-shirt up to rest on the top of her chest. 

Noah’s eyes focused on her chest, watching as she used one hand to massage her breasts from over her bra, the other still holding firm to his cock. She could see his eyes bouncing back and forth between her chest and the sight of most of his cock disappearing past her lips, since she was still trying her best to keep her sights set on him. 

A low groan escaped him, his hips thrusting forward to further feel more of her mouth. “You're so fucking hot.”

Seph then took it upon herself to tug down the cups of the bralette she wore, baring her chest to him. If his pupils weren't blown before then they definitely were now as he watched her play with herself, both for his entertainment and also to help relieve some of the tension she was feeling. 

Unfortunately, her dream of cumming hard was not in the works of coming true. 

“Dude, what the fuck are you-”

“Fuck! Folio! Get out!” 

Suddenly she was forced to the side and her mouth emptied as he pulled back, Noah’s body turning to shield not only himself, but also her from the intruder. 

“Shitshitshit! Dude! I'm sorry!” 

Seph was quickly trying to pull her shirt down after she had dropped to her bottom on the bathroom floor, while also attempting to see around Noah so that Folio could catch a glimpse of her glare. 

“Shut the fucking door! No! Get out and then shut the door!”

She had been so goddamn close to getting what she wanted. There was no way Noah would've let them exit the bathroom without first making her cum around his cock, but now either of them getting off was a thing of the past. 

“You live here! You have a bedroom!” Folio yelled from the other side of the door, prompting both her and Noah to simultaneously yell for him to ‘fuck off’ - a few other profanities and choice words also added into the mix. 

Seph groaned in annoyance as she continued to work at adjusting her bra and then tying the shirt up at her waist again. When she looked up, Noah had already stuffed himself back into his jeans - albeit a little uncomfortably - and was now extending a hand out to her. 

“I'm pissed,” she exclaimed after taking his hand and pulling herself to her feet with his assistance. Noah heavily sighed, his eyes still focused on her. He began to smooth his hands over her hair, gently tucking strands back behind her ear while nodding in agreement. 

“I'm more pissed that Folio might've seen your tits.” 

A pout and a whine took over her, though Noah only chuckled and pulled her into his chest where she could bury her face for a moment. 

“Don't worry. I'll kick his ass if he says anything about your tits. I already know they're amazing, no one else needs to.” 

“Not funny!” She huffed, the back of her hand lightly smacking against his shoulder. 

“I would see if you wanted to continue, but uh…” he looked down between them, his brows pulling together as if he was concentrating. After a few seconds, Noah released an exasperated sigh and shook his head. “I think the moment is gone…seeing Folio’s dumbass face makes it impossible to stay hard.” 

The moment was so gone that they had no choice but to slyly join the party again. Seph was crossing her fingers that Folio hadn't opened his big mouth to anyone about what he just walked in on, but by the look Alexa gave her, she knew how unlikely that was. 

Thankfully, nothing was said. A few sideways glances weren't going to get her all riled up, not when all of her unhappy feelings were still currently being directed at Folio. She glared at him from over the brim of her cup, though he was none the wiser. Noah, on the other hand, noticed each and every time. Seph could hear his subtle chuckle accompanied by his hand gliding along her lower back as if that would be enough to calm her. It was…kind of…but not fully. 

“Are you drinking?” Noah had bent down so his lips were at her ear, allowing her to clearly hear his inquiry over the sound of mindless chatter around them. 

Uh oh, she had been caught. 

Seph contemplated her response, though she eventually landed on simply nodding. Lying about it definitely wouldn't have been a good idea. If Noah was asking, then that meant he already knew she was. Huh…wonder what it could've been to give her away. 

“Yeah…” she glanced down to her drink, then back up to his eyes that had focused on her with quite a bit of intent. “It was a not so great session, okay? I just wanted to unwind. It's the first time in a year, I swear.” 

A smile then pulled up on his lips and he laughed, head slightly shaking. 

“Seph…Seph…stop. It's okay. I was only asking so I'd know. You know your limits, not me.” 

To further prove that he wasn't upset, Noah lightly held her chin between his fingers and met her halfway for a chaste kiss. As they parted, his arm slung across her shoulders, keeping her pulled in close against him. 

“Never Have I Ever!” Alexa suddenly interjected despite whatever conversations were happening. 

The mention of the game made Jolly groan, his eyes, along with a few others, rolling at the suggestion. 

“Oh, fuck off, you big babies. It's fun! No topics off limits, yeah?” The other girl continued with an animated wiggle of her eyebrows, five fingers now being held up. “And we didn't have enough cups left for beer pong so you get what you get.” 

The remainder of the people around the kitchen island begrudgingly followed suit until they all had a hand up, long swallows of their drinks already being taken before the game even began. 

“That's only four fingers…” she called out to Nicholas, whose brows furrowed as his eyes attempted to focus on his right hand.

Oh, someone had definitely had a bit too much to drink. 

“Ah, shit.” He laughed, only to add the fifth finger to stand with the others. “That's my bad.”

“I'll start!” Alexa further announced while her eyes danced around the people before eventually landing on her. She grinned, already erupting into a small fit of laughter. 

“Never have I ever…been to Sweden.”

Seph narrowed her eyes, though opted to lower a finger for no other reason but to play into the joke. At this point, why the hell not?

“Very funny, you bitch.” She grumbled behind her cup, taking a swallow from the sickeningly sweet concoction. 

The only other person to not have five fingers up was Jolly, and he still appeared very lost and confused by the joke exchanged. 

No, she wasn't actually mad about her Sweden trip being brought up, but Noah still gave the back of her neck a reassuring squeeze when his touch traveled down along her back and then up again. The way he was always touching her definitely didn't help the need she still had for him, although she wasn't going to complain. What she was going to do was squeeze her thighs together to hopefully relieve the slightest bit of tension. 

It sure as fuck didn't work. 

As the game began to slide into a full swing, Seph quickly realized that people were playing rather dirty and purposely singling others out. She should've known this by the opening statement being about her, but she had figured that was just Alexa being…well…Alexa. 

During the game, Seph had told herself not to look at the number of fingers Noah had up, or which he had lowered for. She didn't want to know, especially when the questions were geared more towards the sexual side of things. Unfortunately, when she accidentally caught a glimpse of his two fingers up compared to her four that remained, her mind began to wander. 

Which had he lowered for? 

Oh god…it hadn't been the threesome related statement, right? 

Seph was sure he also hadn't lowered when someone drunkenly muttered incoherent words about having sex with more than two people in a night…right? 

Fuck, she was going to be sick. 

“Never have I ever acted like a complete diva on a video shoot.” 

Wait, what? 

Seph’s eyes quickly drifted to the direction of the voice before realizing the words had been spoken by Nick. He was staring dead at Noah, no laughter or the slightest hint of a smile to be seen. Well…this surely wasn't the Nick she was used to. 

That didn't stop Noah from dropping a finger, leaving him with only one. That one was switched to his middle finger, it now being directed to Nick. 

Before she had a chance to question what Nick was talking about, Noah’s voice cut through the silence that had fallen upon the group. 

“Never have I ever told Folio that I think my best friend’s girlfriend is hot.” 

“Okay, what's happening?” Seph pulled back from Noah a bit so she could look back and forth between both him and Nick. Neither responded, or really even paid her any mind, for they were practically glaring at each other. 

“I mean…Seph is pretty hot…” Alexa nervously murmured to cut the tension. 

“Never have I ever been caught by Folio getting blown by my girlfriend!” 

Jolly laughed, pointing to Folio who was appearing as if he wanted to just curl up and die right then. “Bro, you got a big fucking mouth.” 

“Fuck, I’m sorry, guys! Get some drinks in me and I just start saying things. It's not done on pur-”

Alexa gave his arm a tug to silence him, her head shaking. Yeah, they all knew this wasn't the time for explanations. 

“What is going on?! I really just need someone to fill me in on what I missed because-”

“Never have I ever rejected my girlfriend's advances for sex for over two weeks!” Nick continued despite it not being his turn technically, but it was safe to assume all cordial game play had already gone right out the window. 

Nick’s exclamation was loud enough to cover her own protests and demands for them to cut it out. She abruptly stopped talking, her eyes going wide, the entirety of her body freezing. 

But wait, did they keep saying girlfriend? Okay, now wasn't the time to dwell on that. 

“Oh shit…” Alexa whispered in shock at the outcome of her request to play the juvenile game. 

The way Noah tensed beside her was painfully obvious. She was far too scared to look over at him, knowing damn well he would be wearing an expression that screamed how hurt and furious he was. 

“Nick!” Seph hissed. 

It was like her saying his name had brought him back down to Earth, because he blinked a couple of times and then looked at her. His eyes also went wide to match her own and that's when she knew Nick had no idea he had even just yelled that until the reality of it came toppling down onto him. 

“You told him that?”

Noah’s voice had softened, yet there was still an edge to it; and fuck, was it sharp. 

That was when she finally mustered enough courage to tilt her head up, their eyes meeting. She tried to speak but no words would come out, nothing more beyond a couple of syllables that meant absolutely nothing.  

“No, Noah, I- I mean yes, I did, but I just needed someone to tal…can we talk about this in private?” 

“Nah, you want to talk about our private business to Nick every chance you get, so why don't we let everyone listen in too?” 

“It's not like that!” She quickly protested, her head shaking back and forth.

“He’s my best friend, Seph!”

“He's my friend too! I just didn't have anyone else I could talk to and he's always been able to give me decent advice and-”

“Was it Nick’s decent advice that told you to throw yourself at me in the bathroom?” 

This was the moment when people began to clear out. Of course they wanted to linger and listen to the fight, but everyone was smart enough to know better. For the most part, at least. Before she knew it, only her, Noah, and Nick remained in the kitchen. 

“What?” Her face contorted in confusion, very much lost by the question. “No! That's not…no.”

“Don't worry about it. I'll go ahead to my room and you two can gossip a bit more.” 

Much to his dismay, or so she could assume, she wasn't going to let it drop like that. Instead, she was right on his heels, following him back to his bedroom. Nick was calling out behind them, though neither stopped to figure out what he was saying. 

“Noah…” she softly spoke his name after closing the bedroom door, hesitant steps then being taken closer to where he stood. 

“Do you really want to know why we haven't had sex?” A hand was held up that silently signaled for her to stop progressing forward, which she obeyed, swaying body and all. 

“It's because you aren't attracted to me anymore, right?” Maybe Noah’s question had been rhetorical, but her drunken brain was always going to get the best of her. 

“Because you want someone with more experience or someone with less issues or someone who-” her voice was cracking and wavering as she spoke, the tears welling in her eyes threatening to fall over. 

Never before had she been so thankful for Noah cutting her off. 

“Jesus fucking Christ, Seph, stop. Listen to me.” Noah moved towards her, his inked digits grasping onto her shoulders so she had no choice but to stare straight at him. There was a deep breath that he exhaled, and Seph could tell that he was now struggling to find the words of his own. 

“When I look at you…I just want to fuck the absolute shit out of you. I want you begging and taking it and making those specific little moans that you do when you're really into it.” Noah paused and took a deep breath as if simply saying the words was too much for him to admit. Vulnerability wasn't something he did well. 

“But then at the same time I also just want to hold you as close as possible and make sure you're okay.” His voice softened now, just as his hands released the grip on her shoulders so he could instead slowly rub along her arms.  

“I have to know that you're okay, Seph, and that will always trump my physical needs.”

Now, why the hell couldn't he have said these things to her when they were both sober and shit hadn't just hit the fan? Why did a big explosion have to happen before he would express the deeper side of emotions to her? 

“And lately, I just…I can tell you're not okay. I've tried to get you to talk to me about it but you've been closed off, and I know you're annoyed with my questions all the time but I have to be able to say that I did everything I could to help.”

After a brief shift in his expression, Noah dropped his hands from her arms and took a step back. Maybe he had just remembered that he was mad at her and he needed to act accordingly. Or maybe he felt awkward since she had yet to say anything back to him. 

Oh, right, she did need to actually open her mouth…

“I never asked you to do that for me.”

Wait, no. She was supposed to say something nice! What the fuck was that?

Noah appeared both perplexed and offended by how she chose to respond. If he was trying to figure out why she had said that, then hopefully he’d be able to fill her in once he stumbled upon a conclusion. Not even she knew why. 

“You're unbelievable. What were you expecting me to do?” He breathed out a laugh of disbelief with a hint of annoyance - both completely understandable to be feeling right then. “Stand back and watch as you fade away to nothing? Literally and figuratively.” 

“No, no, that's not what I meant. I don't know why I said that.”

Seph lifted her hands to her head to press against her temples. A headache was slowly creeping up, though she wasn't sure if it was a response to her drinking or the stressful night they were experiencing. 

“Then what did you mean, Seph? I'd really like to know.” 

With her eyes closed and her fingers rubbing slow circles around her temples, she still somehow managed to shake her head and heavily exhale. There was too much going on her mind right then; focusing on one singular thought was proving to be harder and harder. 

“I don't know. I…fuck.” 

Noah dropped his hands to his sides in a dramatic smack and then rubbed over his own face, his form shifting back a few more steps away from her. He was aggravated. She would know this in any mental state. It didn't matter how hazy her mind was. 

“It doesn't make sense, okay? Like…why? Why would you think constantly rejecting me would be helping me?” 

“Because I didn't want you to use us having sex as an outlet!” 

“Oh, I wasn't allowed to have a few minutes of happiness and actually feel something because you were worried I'd…what? Rely on it? Become addicted? Constantly need to sit on your dick?”

“It's longer than a few minutes…” he grumbled. 

“That wasn't a fucking dig at you, Noah!” She groaned in frustration. To say that she was annoyed by his childish comment would've been an understatement. Of course that's what he would choose to latch onto. 

“Also, what guy doesn't want their girlfriend, or whatever, to be on their dick all the time?”

Wasn't that supposed to be the male dream or something like that? 

Those thoughts pushed aside, Seph and Noah stared silently at each other. She could see all the thoughts running through his mind, just as she assumed he could see the same for her. There was a lot she wanted to say, but none of it seemed like it would sound right. It wouldn't feel right. This was obviously a conversation they should be having when sober. 

But was that going to stop her? Probably not. 

“I know you were coming from a good place, okay, I get that. But…fuck…you don't understand how doing that made me feel absolutely terrible. Like something was wrong with me because why else would you be rejecting my advances?” There was another crack in her voice as she tried her best to explain her feelings, though that wasn't very easy to put into words. They both struggled with emoting verbally - if that wasn't already painfully obvious. 

“I needed you to be my boyfriend, Noah. Not my dad or my doctor. Or whatever you are, I don't know.” 

“You don't know? The fuck does that mean? What are you talking about?” 

Seph shrugged as she dropped her eyes down, a thumb now at her mouth for her to nervously chew on her cuticles. 

“You don't know if we're together or not?” 

There was now silence coming from her, this being enough of a response to tell Noah that yes, she didn't know. Or maybe she did? It was all very complicated and she was having an increasingly hard time wrapping her head around it. 

“Christ, Seph, of course we are. Why- what even makes you think we aren't?”

Well, now she definitely felt silly and possibly even a little bit ridiculous. She glanced up to look at Noah from beneath her lashes, her shoulder relaying another small shrug. 

“We've never really talked about it…so I didn't know…”

“You practically live here! In this room! With me! We hold hands, we cook for each other, we sleep in the same bed, we…do other things in bed!” 

Seph wanted to remind him that they rarely did other things in bed as of lately, but she figured he already had to know this. It's what had spawned the entire argument to begin with. 

“Well, I don't know, Noah! I'm not here every night so I don't know what you do or with who!”

Noah definitely looked offended now. Oops. 

“And you're about to leave for tour! Maybe you don't want anything serious before then so you can just…do whatever while you're gone!” 

The words were flowing from her at a rapid pace. Word vomit as people liked to call it. 

“You'll be meeting all these new people and seeing new faces and making new fun memories! While I'm sitting back here in Richm-”

“Then come with us!”

Seph abruptly halted her word vomit so she could process what he had just said. Her brows knitted together in confusion, a deep breath then being taken. 

“What?”

“Come with us on tour,” he repeated. 

“It's just a van, so it'll be cramped and we’ll be in shitty motels, and the food will be from wherever we pass, and I can't promise it'll always smell the best with all the other guys, but I want you to come.” 

More silence from her. Noah’s words kept repeating in her head as she dissected them piece by piece, looking for any evidence that pointed towards him just offering this to shut her up for the night. 

Almost as if Noah could sense this, he took a step closer to her, a hand reaching out to lightly rub along the back of her arm. 

“I've been wanting to ask you but I was worried that maybe it wouldn't be what's best for you right now. I was being your doctor and not your boyfriend…I can see that.” 

The hand on her elbow tightened so he could pull her into him, both of his long arms then securing around her to keep her close against his chest. Seph instinctively circled her own arms around his waist, face buried into him as he planted a kiss to the top of her head. 

This was where she felt the most comfortable. Her happy place. 

“Okay,” she finally murmured. The word was muffled but she knew Noah heard her by the way his arms tightened even more around her body. 

“Okay?” He repeated, clearly wanting her to elaborate even though he knew and she knew that he knew. 

“Okay, I'll go with you.” 

× × ×

REWIND: THE HILL'S GARDEN PARTY

NOAH

“I’m going to go grab some things real quick since we’re here, okay? It'll only take a couple of minutes.” 

Noah wanted to protest because that meant he would be left alone with the wolves, but he smiled and gave her a nod. She was already leaning in close to kiss him, which he would've been crazy to deny, and even crazier to ruin with his childish pout. 

Only when Seph disappeared into her house did he finally tear his gaze away from where she had been. He took in a deep breath and slowly exhaled, his eyes now drifting around to briefly study the faces of those around him. Some were still glancing his way but most had taken to acting like he wasn't even there. If they were friends with Seph's dad then he was sure only the nicest of things had been said about him. 

“Enjoying the party?”

Noah turned to see the devil himself approaching, a polite but slightly sinister smile taking residence on his face. There wasn't much that he was scared of but this man…he truly made his insides churn. 

“Can't really say it's my style,” he attempted to joke, a nervous laugh to follow. 

Mr. Hill only held his gaze even as he took a swallow from his drink. “I won't disagree with you.” 

“Listen…” his heavy hand laid against the back of Noah’s shoulder to guide him to the side, away from prying ears but not so distant that people would grow curious. “I thought you and I had come to an understanding.” 

Noah’s fists clenched and unclenched at his sides, his jaw tightening and heart rate immediately picking up. 

“So, why are you here? And why is my daughter still parading around with you?” 

Silence was the only answer he could give. Back when Seph was away in Sweden, her dad had paid him a visit. Their conversation was mostly about the video circulating thanks to Maisie, but it had transitioned to the typical ‘stay away from my daughter’ monologue. Noah had only agreed so that the man would get out of his face. There was no intention to actually follow through with the empty promise, not until her dad 'sweetened the deal'. Initially he had denied all bribes but after the guys heard what the man was offering…

“I gave you the money to pay for that van your little band needed. I talked to my buddy who cut you the deal of a lifetime on your house. I held up my end of the bargain, so why haven't you? Are you not a man of your word, Noah?” 

Just hearing the things he had agreed to made him sick. There was a sting of acid in the back of his throat and he truly considered vomiting on Mr. Hill right then. Noah managed to swallow it down but only because he knew the man's suit cost more than his monthly mortgage. 

Despite Noah's silence, Seph’s dad could somehow read every thought he was having. He lowly chuckled, the grip on Noah’s shoulder briefly tightening. 

“Whatever you're thinking right now, go ahead and shove it all away. What you two have isn't love.” He grimaced through the last word. “It's fascination, rebellion, boredom.” 

“You don't know anything about what Seph and I have,” Noah finally spoke through gritted teeth. “If I could give you back every dime right now, I would. None of that stuff is more important than Seph.”

“No? Then why don't you go on and tell her? Let's find out from Persephone what's important.”

Noah shrugged the older man's hand from his shoulder, although in an indiscreet way that wouldn't draw the eye of others. He took in a sharp breath to attempt calming his nerves before shaking his head to the idiotic suggestion. 

“You want her to know even less than I do because you know it won't only be me she writes off.” Noah shared an intense glare with Mr. Hill, one that his wife must've noticed because she was soon approaching the pair and attempting to diffuse the conversation with a smile and quickly strung together lies. 

“Noah, it really was great to see you again,” Marilyn dramatically gushed while brushing a piece of invisible lint from her husband’s shoulder. “Dear, I think I just heard Bannon mention something about being in the market for a new office building?” 

With a tilt of his head, the man finished his drink and then pushed the empty glass into Noah’s chest for him to discard as if he was nothing more than the hired help.

“Davis,” he grumbled out his departure mere moments before Seph reappeared looking flushed but eager to leave. 

[lenaswritingandstuff]

Losing Game [Antoine Griezmann x fem!OC] (Chap. II)

Requested: No​

Pairing: Antoine Griezmann x OC!Gabrielle Darian; more to be added.

Warnings: English is not my first language!

Wordcount: 3.6K+

A/N: GIF IS NOT MINE. Enjoy!

Previous chapter

CHAPTER II

The day after, waking up was more complicated than I envisioned. I rubbed my eyes and heard Louisa’s alarm ringing in her bedroom. Sighing, I got up and went to the corridor.

“Morning.”

“Yo.”

“Go put some clothes first,” I said. “You better not be late to class.”

Still a bit sleepy, she went “hum” and walked to the bathroom. I went to the living room, turned on the TV, and prepared breakfast in the open kitchen. I consulted my phone and Louisa then arrived, now fully awake.

“Here,” I handed her a cup of coffee.

“Thanks girl. Slept well?”

“Not bad, you?”

“Not enough. I don’t wanna go to class at all” she sighed. “Tell me why I’m in college again?”

“Because you want to be a psychologist,” I answered with a little smile. “Since you were little.”

“Oh, right.”

She made herself some toasts, and we talked a bit.

“What plans do you have for this morning?” she asked.

“Oh, nothing special. Except for that interview.”

“Oh, that’s nice.”

“Barely.” I said raising my shoulders.

I liked giving interviews, because it gave me the opportunity to talk about the company and cases that were dear to me. The problem were the journalists who cared more about the clothes I was wearing than the company and their idiotic questions. Louisa, who was now gonna be late, went to preparing herself while I cleared the table. She came back a few minutes later, put a jacket on, and then turned to me.

“We’re having lunch together, right?”

“Of course.”

“Awesome. See ya, bestie!”

“See you!”

She blew me a kiss and then left. My parents hired me – and by that I mean forced me to work for them – as soon as I finished high school, but they insisted on me going to college, but through distance education. They wanted me to a business course like Noah did, but I managed to convince them to let me study English, in order to become a translator from English to French. It was what I wanted to do since middle school, and since I didn’t see myself working for my parents’ company my whole life, I didn’t see what else I could do. I went to prepare myself, and once I was ready, left the apartment. In the corridor I see the janitor, who greeted me with a nod. The company’s headquarters were twenty minutes away, which was rather helpful. I loved my car a lot. It wasn’t the kind of car my parents loved, but I wouldn’t trade it for any other.

After spending thirty minutes on the road because of the traffic, I finally arrived in front of the grey building which was a bit sinister at first and that I now knew by heart.

“Morning!” I said to the receptionists.

“Morning Miss Darian!”

I took the elevator, and arrived on the fourth floor, where my desk was. When I first got here, my father didn’t know where to put me, and decided I would work at “the finance floor” as we called it. I’m not complaining, because everybody working at that loor is very nice. I said hi to the girls who were already here and sat behind my desk. No one had induvial offices here, except on the last floor, which was where my parents and my stupid brother worked. I turned my computer on and started to work. I corrected some mistakes on the next gala’s invitations and the article on yesterday’s night, which was supposed to be published in two days. I got a text from Louisa telling me she’s bored in class. I smiled and wrote to her to hang on. That kind of thing reminds me of much I love distance education. I had finished my work, and since I had an hour to kill, I decided to take out one of my lessons and work on it. I didn’t see the hour go, and it was the phone ringing on my desk that brought back to reality.

“Hello?”

“Miss Darian, your appointment is here.”

I completely forgot about this interview.

“Oh, right. Coming.”

“She’s waiting for you on the second floor.”

“Thank you.”

I hanged up and walked to the elevator. Once on the second floor, I entered the room full of small sofas we usually used for birthday celebrations and stuff like that. The woman who was waiting had her back turned and was wearing the highest heels I ever saw. I was relieved she didn’t have any camera with her.

“Hello,” I say walking to her.

She turned around, and gave me a fake smile while her eyes, hided by her glasses, remained cold.

“Miss Darian, it’s really nice to meet you. I’m Anne Forand.”

She presented a hand with manicured nails, and I shook it reluctantly.  

“Nice to meet you too.”

I showed her the sofa behind her, and sat on the sofa that faced it. She started recording, and gave me a fake smile again.

“Gabrielle, – I can call you Gabrielle, right? – if you had to describe Darian Enterprises, which is, just as a reminder, your parents’ company, in a few words, how would you do it?”

Basic question. Nice. And she’s looking down upon me. Stay calm girl. I cleared my throat and smiled at her.

“Darian Enterprises," I answered, “aim to help people who need it through money donation or merchandise in order to create a more egalitarian society. That’s really important to us. We also have been working on projects for the environment and the planet’s protection for some time.”

She gave a confused look and smiled once again.

“Your parents, Anita and Xavier, are known for their good heart and for being very selfless – which led to this company being created. Did you try to create a different image or are you satisfied just by walking in their footsteps?”

I answered calmly, but if it was just me, I would just throw her out. The questions’ double meaning is more and more obvious: she’s accusing me of just being here because of my parents and in the next question of refusing to work in the office with my brother. I get really quickly that this so-called journalist is just here to push the blame on me, with, if possible, a scoop. Any journalist who would want to know more about the company would go see my parents, not me – unless they have a particular topic. I answer every question with calm, mostly because if I don’t and my mother hears it, she’s gonna kill me. The journalist doesn’t give up, as she doesn’t get that I didn’t fall for her trap. After a few stupid questions, the last question finally comes in.

“Last question: you’re young, rich, pretty” – the last word doesn’t easily come out – “and you’re famous. Such a young girl cannot be single, can she?”

Here is the scoop she wants. What does she expect, exactly? Me revealing that I’m dating the rock star that is currently everywhere on TV or a famous football player? Damn it, just remind me to fish in my next life.

“Well, apparently she can. I don’t have anybody.”

She gave a smile that’s telling me she thinks I’m lying, and stopped the record.

“Very well. Do you mind if I take a picture? For the article, I mean” she added as if I was dumb.

I’m gonna shove the damn picture up your ass-

“Sure.”

I fixed my hair quickly, and she asked me to pose by the window before taking the picture with her phone.

“Well, I’ve got everything I need. Thank you very much, Gabrielle.”

“The main exit in on your right once you’re on the first floor.”

I turned my back on her without shaking the hand she gave me and left the room. She bugged me for real. I go back to my floor, and eat a candy from the candy pack I keep in my desk. I need to get back to studying, so I continue working on the last lesson. One could really ask why I come to the office…Time luckily flies so fast, and one of my coworkers, Estelle, bring me back to Earth when she calls me.

“Gabrielle? It’s lunch time for us, and time to go home for you.” she says gently.

“Already? Oh my. See you tomorrow, Estelle.”

“Have a good afternoon, beautiful.”

I was lucky that her and the other girls eventually saw me as a coworker and not just as the bosses’ daughter. I turned my computer off, got up from my chair, said goodbye to my coworkers and took the elevator. I say goodbye to the receptionists and then get on my car. Barely five minutes later, traffic already starts to be horrible. That’s the main thing I don’t like about Paris - closely followed by the fact that's there is too many people. I finally arrived home, and parked my car right besides Louisa’s. I go up to the apartment, and meet Louisa in front of our door.

“Hey! How was work?” she asked.

“As usual. How about the classes?”

“Oh, Gaby, it was so boring, you have no idea…”

She opened the door and I followed her inside. I put my bag aside and sit on the sofa.

“By the way, how was the interview?”

I tell her everything, and she mumbles unpolite things to the journalist and laughs when I tell her how I said goodbye.

“You need to tell your mom”, she said more seriously. “That woman better not come back.”

“You know damn well that if I talk to my mother about it she’ll say ‘Gabrielle, stop acting like a child, your brother doesn’t complain about journalists who come to see him.’ No way, I’m out.”

“You’re right.”

“Alright, let’s prepare lunch.”

She tells me all about her morning while cooking, and once it’s done, we sat on the sofa and watch the news on the TV.

“And now”, the news presenter said, “we’re moving on to a topic that a lot of French people will be entertained about and that will surely be in a lot of conversations: the Football World’s Cup! It will take place in Russia…”

“They’re gonna be damn cold over there,” Louisa commented. “It will be in summer, though, so maybe the weather will be hotter, don’t you think?”

“Girl, do I look like a weather girl to ya?”

“We got an exclusive entry in the team’s base, Clairefontaine,” the presenter went on, “to follow the preparation to a competition that could very well change French football’s history, the players and a lot of people’s lives.”

A few days later, it was barely awake and running that I arrived at work. Damn alarm o’clock not even capable of ringing. I barely had passed the glass doors when one of the secretaries, Virginie, called for me.

“Miss Gabrielle! The Director of Operations called, she wants to see you in her office as soon as now.”

Nice, awful day coming up. When I started working here, I asked for my mother to only be called “the Director of Operations” when she gave me a message, and thankfully, they all accepted.

“Alright, I’ll go now. Thank you!”

Sighing, I took the elevator and looked at my phone. Shit, I’m fifteen minutes late. I fixed my hair as much as I could, as I didn’t want to give my mother other things to criticize. I arrived on the last floor, where my parents and brother worked. The door of my brother’s office was closed, poor thing probably having asked to start work later in the day. What a jerk. I greeted my mother’s assistant and knocked at my mother’s door.

“Come in.”

I obliged and saw her, as I expected, classily dressed up, sitting behind her desk with a piece of paper in front of her.

“You’re late.” She commented, her eyes still on the paper.

“Sorry, I didn’t w-”

“I do not care.”

She looked up to me and rolled her eyes.

“Well, do not stand here like an idiot, sit down.”

“Thanks.” I mumbled, and then sat.

“That shirt is horrendous, Gabrielle,” she commented again, “I already told you to throw it away.”

“I can leave, if you want, that way you won’t have to look at it,” I retorted, pretending to get up.

“Don’t play silly with me. If I told you to come, it’s for something really serious.”

Wow, I would have never guessed.

“Go on, then.”

“You’ve been working here for years now, and if I admit the work you’ve been doing until now is average, but you have yet to be given great responsibilities.”

“One would wonder why,” I muttered.

“But I decided it was time to change that. That’s why you will be organizing the next gala.”

“You’re going on a vacation?” I asked, confused.

“Of course not,” she said as if I was an idiot, “but I think it’s time for you to finally do something correct.”

“It’s ironic for you to call my work ‘correct’, giving that you’re the one in charge of giving your approval to everything that concerns the company’s galas”, I noted with a small laugh. “If you don’t love what I’m doing, why is everything I send you immediately approved?”

“Don’t you dare talk to me like that!” she screamed with a now pink face, hitting her desk with her hand.

I’d be lying if I said it didn’t make me jump. She took a deep breath and tried to calm down.

“I have until next month, I guess?”

“No, the gala you’re going to organize is taking place on May 31thst.”

Wonderful. 

“Why do you want to have another gala so soon? Generally, we have one per month.”

“A lot of important people I wanted to invite to last week’s gala were on vacation, they’re back now. Here, here is a list of people I want at your gala. The money we’ll get will be use to send medical equipment and medications to poor countries, where ill people greatly miss medical care.”

I took the paper she put in front of me and quickly read it. I knew a few names of it but most of the guests are strangers.

“Can I invite other people? We haven’t invited Mr. Valere in, like, a year-”

“No, that list is enough. Don't send me the ideas you might have, they'll be terrible.”

I already know my ideas were going to be rejected, so I wasn't even going to try.

“Alright, well, I’m gonna get to work. Is that all you wanted to tell me?”

“No, I actually wanted to talk about the last gala.”

“I can’t organize that one,” I remarqued.

“Your brother told me what you did. This is just indecent, Gabrielle, I cannot believe you did this!”

I had almost forgot about the accident, since Noah, who I barely saw, never talked to me again about it.

“Indecent?” I exclaimed. “And how would you call cheating on your girl with your ex, and cheat on your new girl with your new ex? Because that’s what your precious little boy is doing! He can bang every girl he meets, I couldn’t care less, but he could do it one by one, for the love of God!”

“I told you not to speak to me like that! I’ve had enough of you, get out of here before I really get angry.”

Without answering her, I left the room. I walked past Noah’s office on my way to the elevator, but at the last second, I decided to go visit dear momma’s boy. I open the door without knocking and find him sitting. He sees me, and, confused, opens his mouth but I’m faster:

“Hey, you swine, next time you’ve got a problem with me, come tell me face to face instead of going crying to our mother like a fucking kid. Does she still change your diaper? Is it also her that put your condom on when you’re cheating on your girlfriends? Stupid asshole.”

Before he could answer, I slammed the door and took the elevator. It feels good to scream a little, I’ll admit. I’m still tensed when I arrive on my usual floor and greet my coworkers. I sat, and decide to make a list of things to do for the gala, and another for the possible services I’ll have to hire. Once it’s done, I get up and walk to Estelle, who’s in charge of the financial floor.

“Estelle? Can I have a word with you?”

“Sure!” she said with a smile.

“My mother asked me to take care of the next gala…”

“My, that’s wonderful, Gaby, congrats!”

“Yeah, thank you. Would you mind doing an estimation of the night? I’ll only have to add the room.”

“Sure, I’ll give to you asap.”

“Awesome, thanks a lot.”

I went back to my desk and spent the rest of the morning looking for a place. It needs to be both beautiful, otherwise my mother will say I have no taste, and cheap, or she’ll accuse me of ruining the company. Once it’s passed noon, I left quickly, wanting to get back home as soon as I could.

*-*

I slammed the door behind me, saying insults I held back for the whole morning. I threw my bag and my shoes on the corridor’s entrance. In the living room, I found Louisa reading a book for college.

“Well, well”, she said. “Who is it, your mother or your brother?”

“Both,” I mumbled.

I tell her everything, and she laughs when I tell her Noah told my mother everything.

“It was obvious he would do it, your brother’s got nothing down there. It’s surprising how much girls he gets, actually.”

“I don’t care that my mother knows or if she screams at me, she can’t do anything else, but the principle of snitching is revolting me.”

“Of course.”

“When I had a problem with him, I didn’t go cry to our parents. They weren’t even there, for God’s sake!”

“Nah, you, you just tried to kill him.” She laughed.

“Come on, let it go, it was just one time.”

When I was six, Noah and I got into a fight, and he made me so anrgy so that I took a casserole from the kitchen and hit him on the head with it once or twice – okay, maybe like five times. He had a bump, and I got a severe punishment, and I regret absolutely nothing.

“It’s not like he never slapped me.”

“Touché. Tatiana used to hit me too when we were kids.”

“Yeah, but it was just giving little slaps behind the head, and anyways your sister is awesome. I would sell Noah and a kidney in a second to have her as a sister.”

Tatiana was Louisa’s older sister, and I adored her. Louisa and she were really close, and she always saw me as a sister – which was reciprocal. Yes Tatiana was awesome, but sadly, her parents disagreed on that.

“You’re right,” she laughed again. “Alright, I’m starving to death, let’s eat.”

After lunch, I wanted to continue preparing the gala, but Louisa convinces me to take a nap, and I eventually give up. I wake up barely rested, but calmed down. At the end of the afternoon, Louisa came back from college, agitating the small bag in her hand.

“Since I’m the best BFF in the world, I took éclairs at the bakery on my way back!”

“Aw, you’re adorable, thank you!”

I kissed her on the cheek to thank her, and we eat the snack while she tells me about her afternoon. Later on, she proposes to order pizza, which I gladly accept, and we spend the night laughing and complaining about our dreadful families while thanking heaven for knowing each other.

*-*

The day after, I find the perfect place, and announced on the company’s website the date and place of the gala on the 31st of May. Then it’s time to pick the caterer. The one my mother usually chooses is excellent, but to mess with her, I’m gonna pick another one. After one hour of research and phone calls, I find one who’s price is a bit high but with a very good reputation. I go the “communication floor” to talk about the invitations, and I find Sabrina, a pretty brunette entering her forties, waiting for me. We quickly agree on everything, and I give total freedom, as before I arrived, she was the one taking care of the invitations and was doing a fantastic job. She shows me the article she wrote to announce the date and place for the gala, and I approve it immediately. After I leave, I wonder if I should see my mother to tell her the organization is going well, but she’ll send me just send me to hell.  Two hours later, my day is done and I decide to go get groceries. I go to the supermarket and park my car when my phone starts ringing. I expect it to be Louisa, but to my surprise, it’s Sabrina.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Gabrielle, it’s me again. I’m sorry to bother you…”

“No, it’s more than fine,” I assure her.

“I got a call about the next gala,” she said.

“Right…” I say, inviting her to go on.

“It’s from certain people who asked to come to the gala.”

“Who is it? Do we know them?”

“Well, more or less.”

Well, well.

“Who is it?”

“Didier Deschamps.”

“The National Football Team’s Coach?” I exclaimed.

Dang it, Gabrielle you idiot, of course it’s him.

“Yes,” Sabrina answered. “He and the players want to come to the gala.”

NEXT CHAPTER

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❝ ABOUT ME ❞

hi, i go by zoya trivedi, nice to meet ya!

i use the pronouns: she/her.

sun sign: capricorn, rising sign: taurus, moon sign: libra

i love watching sports, i love listening to music, i love coffee and chai, i hate flowers and halloween. 

feminist • the cool aunt • slytherin (but also hufflepuff) • hades, poseidon, apollo • candor, dauntless, erudite •

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litg s2 | saying nope | chapter 5

pairing: mc x noah

(a/n): i couldn’t remember the name of the dish that marisol says in the game, so i just stuck with my salvadorian theme from last time. she dances bachata and makes pupusas!!

a light shift in the weight of the mattress awakened you momentarily. without the harsh white light and muffled groans of the communal bedroom, you found yourself all too happy to catch up on your beauty sleep, the canopy of the daybed shielding your face from the morning sun. you stretched your arms, allowing one of them to land on the empty blanket directly next to you. marisol must have gotten up to get a head start on grafting. you sat up groggily in bed for a few minutes, before sheepishly realizing that your plan to have cheeky morning chats with at least one of the boys had not worked out well. but even still, you felt a sense of comfort remembering the conversation you’d had the night before with marisol, and hurried off to get dressed for the day.

you became determined to stay in the competition, if for nothing else, then perhaps for her.

after reemerging from the back door of the villa, clad in a stylish bikini and slightly greasy from a layer of sunscreen, you strolled into the outdoor kitchen. marisol and hannah had already started working away at two respective breakfasts, with marisol frying something that smelled heavenly in a skillet, and hannah mashing some avocado rather frustratedly.

you: what’s cooking, good-looking?

both girls looked up from their food, although you noticed hannah instinctively look back down once she realized it was you. marisol giggled cheerfully.

marisol: i’m making pupusas. hopefully they turn out right, i can’t even remember the last time i made this recipe from memory.

you: that’s a lot of pupusa for one person.

marisol: that’s because i was planning to share.

you: ooh, should i count myself lucky or is this part of the big graft for today?

marisol: i can make some more later if you want, but these are part of my last ditch effort to make myself known to one of the boys. i don’t even think i’ve properly hung out with any of them but rahim.

you looked over to the other side of the counter, where hannah was busy trying to spread her avocado across some toast without getting any of it on her hands.

you: and who’s yours for, hannah?

hannah: gary, of course!

she excitedly picked up her cutting board and ingredients and brought them closer to where you stood.

hannah: we hung out with priya, bobby, lottie, and rocco last night and it felt like we were all couples’ friends!

you: wow, i didn’t think gary would be the type to have couples’ friends.

hannah: i didn’t think so either, but we had a little talk about what we both saw for our futures. i said my dream is to live in a nice little tudor style cottage with a couple of kids, a dog or two, and a husband i’m still totally obsessed with even as we slowly grey together.

you: oh, that sounds really romantic. it definitely sounds like you.

hannah: thank you, (Y/N)! it’s kinda been my dream since i saw pride & prejudice as a kid. i totally didn’t think gary would go for it, but all he said was, “if the cottage is by the seaside i’d be chuffed to live there”.

marisol: but do you think he meant he’d wanna live there with you?

hannah’s expression soured.

hannah: what do you mean by that?

she backed away from the conversation, shuffling toward the spice cabinet in search of toast toppings, but lingering with her back facing marisol. marisol continued on, unbothered.

marisol: i’m just saying, babes, it didn’t sound like he thought you were compatible before then.

you: hannah, don’t feel bad. gary’s a family man, but he isn’t precious about romance like you are. his idea of love was that it should be realistic, remember?

marisol: gary’s not the type to unnecessarily romanticize his life. he’s practical about love, including in this competition, which is why i’m officially putting an egg in his basket today.

hannah spun around, her eyes wider than ever.

hannah: is that who you’re cooking for?

marisol sent you a look, almost as if to confirm that telling her wouldn’t be a tactical mistake, but ultimately marisol’s brows furrowed in guilt.

marisol: babes, it’s the name of the game. i don’t like having to fight for a man either, but it’s what we have to do to stay here. and, if things don’t work out with gary, talking to one of the other boys might secure your spot so you can wait for a bombshell that suits your taste.

hannah: but gary suits my taste. i’ve wanted things to work with him since day one, and last night he was finally acting a little less lad-ish. i think that means he’s ready to move forward.

marisol: well color me confused, hun. if gary’s your type on paper, then how come you don’t like that he’s a bit of a cheeky chappy? i don’t think wanting a guy to change his personality is a very realistic thing to expect. plus, if you want somebody more mature, your best bet might be to speak to one of the other boys - like noah.

you: though, you won’t have much luck barking up that tree.

hope: fingers crossed for that.

hope and lottie rocked up to the kitchen as if summoned by the mention of noah. they claimed the two barstools that were set across from the stove, prompting you to move a little closer to marisol as she carried on cooking.

lottie: no surprise here; marisol’s advocating for all out guerilla warfare amongst ourselves. the structure of the couples exists for a reason, babe. and isn’t it a little stereotypically mean girl of you to sneak around with another girl’s man?

marisol: it probably would be, if it wasn’t literally the point of the show. but, i’m not trying to single any of you girls out, which is why i’ve been looking at all of your men. and actually, now that i think about it, rocco and i have been having really good chats.

you: really?

your eyebrows raised, as this was a revelation to you. lottie remained still, trying her best not to look concerned, though she soon got up and went to make a coffee on the other side of the kitchen. her fists began clenching as she walked off, her body language stiff.

marisol: yeah, we actually have a lot to talk about. did you lot know that he went to uni?

you: i’d never heard of it.

hope shrugged in agreement. lottie was not yet out of hearing range, and decided to reinsert herself into the group, this time sticking by hannah’s side as she rummaged through a cupboard for mugs.

lottie: it wasn’t something that came up naturally when we’ve chatted, but it might’ve with more time.

marisol: well, he didn’t seem too keen to elaborate. he just mentioned that he went for the first two years and dropped out. after that, he went quiet.

hannah: marisol, you’re such a natural at talking to people. gary’s really into (Y/N), too, and both of you are so much prettier than me. he’d choose either of you without blinking. is there any way you could just wait until after tonight to graft on him?

you: hannah, babes, you wouldn’t want him to choose you just cos he doesn’t think he’s got any other choice, would you? wouldn’t it be more romantic if a guy chose you cos he felt a real connection?

hope: hun, if i didn’t know noah was picking me tonight, i might not even agree to couple up if he didn’t work for it. a guy should make you feel like you’re the only girl on earth! if he doesn’t give you the basic respect of being with you for you, then don’t waste your time. that goes for you too, marisol. maybe take a break from putting eggs in baskets to check that you’re not part of someone else’s contingency plan.

marisol: i appreciate your concern, even if it’s slightly backhanded, but i’m not just acting for the sake of contingency. and neither are any of the boys at the moment.

marisol busied herself transferring her food from pan to plate, wiping the edges with a napkin and adding a few decorative herbs.

hope: i’m not tryna say anything about you, babes. i still want all of us girls to be on the same side and look out for each other, at least as much as the competition will allow. how you wanna play the game is none of my business.

you: speaking of looking out for the girls, where’s priya?

lottie: ugh, (Y/N), i thought we were finally having a nice girls’ chat. even if the recoupling is making some of us a bit delusional in anticipation.

you looked down at the ground in disbelief, thinking about rolling your eyes, but ultimately afraid of how lottie would react. you regularly found yourself surprised at how many big personalities were in the villa, and especially amongst the girls, things seemed to be constantly teetering on the edge of a drama supernova.

hope: priya’s still upstairs. poor thing, she was really shy about chatting with any of us after last night. it’s no wonder she seems to think we all see her as the bad guy.

hope glared at lottie with a rather cartoonish annoyance. the latter was in her own world, preoccupied with preparing two mugs of the coffee that had just finished brewing. you took the opportunity, seeing that everyone was more focused on themselves, to slip away.

you: i’m gonna go find her.

you speed-walked around the kitchen island, wanting to leave before anything got tense but still having enough time to catch hope in your periphery. she clearly heard you, but didn’t acknowledge your departure. you half-remembered the way to the communal bathroom, as the sheer size of the villa never ceased to amaze and confuse you. but suddenly, another person colliding into you forced you out of the depths of your childlike wonder.

gary: bloody hell, (Y/N), have you left your contacts out today?

he had been emerging from the bathroom, some kind of masculine scent hung subtly in the air around him - a welcome change from the aggressive fruit fragrances that followed the girls. the hallway that two of you stood in was quite narrow, at least compared to the massive communal spaces elsewhere in the villa. gary’s tall frame almost felt like it was engulfing you in the dimly lit corridor.

you: sorry, i was just looking for priya.

gary: oh, well, last i saw she was in the bedroom with bobby, having a one-on-one sat on their bed.

you: shite... then i guess i shouldn’t disturb them.

gary: you needed to chat to her?

you: i kinda just wanted to talk to someone that wouldn’t antagonize me.

gary: you’re talking about the other girls?

you sighed, leaning your shoulder against the wall.

you: they’re nice individually, but some of them just get so defensive about the competition. marisol was making you breakfast and hannah was almost in tears; she said you seemed really into her last night.

gary: erm, wow, that’s a lot to take in. so, marisol fancies me?

you: oh, er, maybe i shouldn’t have said that. but, she’ll be up here any minute, they both will be i guess. she just said she’s putting an egg in your basket.

gary: and did you come find me for a cheeky graft before that happened?

your cheeks felt hot under gary’s gaze. your lips couldn’t help but curve upwards in a playful scoff at his straightforwardness.

you: no, i actually did come here to find priya. but, i can’t lie, both of them seem to really fancy you. i kinda just wanna wash my hands of the situation. i’m tired of being caught in the middle.

gary: does that mean you wouldn’t wanna couple up with me?

his expression suddenly turned serious, as his bright blue eyes bore into you more than ever.

you: no... i mean, not at all. i’d actually really like that.

gary broke into a lopsided grin.

gary: good to know.

you breathed in sharply, having to stop yourself from staring at him for hours.

you: well, i’ll leave you to it. enjoy being king of the villa for the day.

with that, the both of you continued on in separate directions. you pivoted into the bathroom, halfheartedly looking for priya again, though you wound up thanking your lucky stars for doing so. gary couldn’t have gone more than ten steps before marisol and hannah’s voices appeared in the hallway, both sounding quite frantic and traveling with him as he attempted to head downstairs. after the commotion died down, you gave yourself a silent pep talk in the mirror. fixing your hair and makeup slightly, you breathed in and out deeply, readying yourself to return outside with a confident nod.

the sun was somewhat hotter and higher in the sky. small clusters of people were scattered all across the back lawn, although the first to pique your interest was noah and hope, who were sitting with their legs folded on the daybed you’d slept in. hope was hunched over, and it quickly dawned on you that noah’s hand was in her lap. an open bottle of glittery purple nail polish was balancing on his kneecap.

hope: (Y/N)! i need a second opinion. would you come over here and tell noah that all nail polish names are ridiculous?

she beckoned you over, not using too energetic of a hand gesture, so as not to smudge noah’s nails as she painted them.

noah: this one’s called disco damsel.

you: honestly, i don’t think i could say either way.

hope: i wish i brought a nice matte black for you, but we’ll just have to make do with this shade. promise you won’t wear blue jeans tonight, alright babe?

noah nodded calmly.

you: wow, you two, this is proper cute though.

hope smiled giddily, while noah still hadn’t moved a centimeter.

noah: being secure in your masculinity means knowing surface-level changes don’t strip you of it.

hope: stop, that’s so deep. how did i get so lucky?

noah: i’m the lucky one. and i was lucky enough to listen to the radio as a kid.

hope: oh god, not this again. (Y/N), noah keeps humming these 80′s power ballads and somehow can’t believe i don’t know them all by heart!

he started humming an instantly recognizable melody.

you: that’s africa by toto. hope, babes, you’re telling me you’ve never heard that?

hope: ugh, maybe (Y/N) wasn’t the best choice to have my back. aren’t you a bit of a musician after all?

noah: oh yeah, when all of us lads were meeting on day one, i heard rumors that one of the girls worked in music.

you: i wouldn’t say it’s my “work”, i just do some odd gigs here and there, so i decided to put it on my application.

noah: well, either way, you don’t have to be a pro to know toto are the best around. even though, i don’t totally get the comparison of mount kilimanjaro to mount olympus. they’re both mountains. it’s like saying, “lottie and bobby had never met. they were like two koi fish, who’d also never met.”

you: hmm, maybe the lyric is referring to the religious significance of mount olympus? by implying that kilimanjaro might have a similar relevance to the serengeti...

hope: babes, if i fall asleep and ruin this manicure, that’s on you.

you: er, well, i’ll leave you guys to it then. didn’t mean to intrude.

hope: alright, but don’t go too far. i wanna talk game plan with you later, and i swear, it’s all in your best interest. deal?

you pursed your lips doubtingly. it was most certainly against your best interest to take advice from anyone else in the villa, especially one of the girls - when it was clear as day that none of them were too fond of each other.

hope carefully screwed the nail polish top back onto the bottle, motioning for noah to air out his left hand. she got up from the daybed to meet your eye level.

hope: (Y/N), babes, it’s the first elimination. as much as someone has to go, i know you’re the most vulnerable, and i want you to have a fighting chance. noah and i have been speaking about it, and we think you’ll defo survive with the right strategy. you’re top pick for a lot of the boys.

as you contemplated hope’s truce offer, your eyes wandered off to the rest of the back lawn. some of the boys were lifting weights and chatting around the exercise equipment. they didn’t seem to have a care in the world; among the group were gary and bobby. you pondered what they could possibly be talking about, and if it involved you at all. when hope mentioned, “a lot of the boys”, there surely weren’t too many others that could’ve referred to. yet, they weren’t as cutthroat as the girls. whichever one of them chose you - if any - would simply get to keep you as a prize. it wasn’t life or death for them, as it felt like for you.

realizing you’d done the real-life equivalent of leaving hope on read for almost a minute, your eyes snapped back to the daybed in front of you. but for a moment, they landed first on noah. his gaze was fixated up at you, keeping the same calmness of the other boys. his cheeks were puffed up slightly, as he blew on his freshly painted nails. his eyes and eye smile almost taunted you, sending a message you simply didn’t have the energy to decode while hope was around.

you: i know.

you backed away from the conversation. slowly but surely, it dawned on you how off-putting your last comment was, though you shrugged it off. the thought that noah might have a puzzle of you to solve in his head - as he existed in yours - was becoming more welcome. as you approached the gym area intuitively, you discovered the reason your subconscious wanted you there. marisol's voice was audible; seemingly stemming from a heated debate she was having with ibrahim. though, his lips remained thoroughly sealed as he continued lifting weights.

marisol: do you have nothing to say to that?!

looking left and right, you caught a glimpse of gary and bobby’s backsides, as it quickly became apparent that they’d fled the scene.

ibrahim: no, but i do have something to say to (Y/N).

flinching as you heard your name, you readied yourself for a less comforting time with marisol than you’d hoped.

ibrahim: (Y/N), marisol is actually tryna tell me that it was a good thing she was grafting on gary this morning.

marisol: that’s not what i said at all, and you’d know if you actually tried to maintain a conversation with me!

you: woah, you two. let’s calm down a bit, yeah?

ibrahim: believe me, i’m calm. i told marisol if she was flirting with gary, there’s nothing i have to say to her.

marisol: rahim, making breakfast for a guy is hardly flirting. and as far as relationship milestones go, he and i are exactly where you and i are at: the very beginning! early days!

ibrahim: so you’re admitting that you wanna start something with him?

marisol: i’m just letting him know that, at this point in the competition, i’m not closed off to him. if tonight was a girls’ choice elimination, you’d be doing the same thing.

ibrahim: i’d be doing that to the girl i’m coupled up with. dunno if you’ve forgotten but, that’s you, marisol.

marisol: well, what if the person you were with was giving you no signs of reciprocated feelings? what if the assumption that your partner would choose you again was so flimsy, you had to develop a safety net?

you: if i may interject...

you took marisol by the wrist, pulling her away from the exercise equipment and into the very back corner of the backyard fence. it was completely exposed to the mallorcan sun and left the tops of your heads almost sizzling, but you couldn’t stand idly while marisol actively decimated her couple.

you: babes, remember last night, when we agreed to be real and give each other solid advice? well... i think, as your friend, i need to let you know you’re kinda bombing with rahim right now.

marisol: i know. everything i’ve learned in my psych classes is telling me to stop going on the offensive but, i can’t help it. he’s made me feel like a fool for liking him so much, and an even bigger one for not realizing that we were clearly more secure than i thought.

you: exactly! at least you realize what he’s saying! he basically just admitted to having tunnel vision for you. i feel like at this point, he wants you to be all in on him, or all out.

marisol: i know, and, i honestly wish i could be. but every fiber of my being is screaming at me to remember the game, and this just isn’t the smartest way to play it. i can’t just beg rahim’s forgiveness for letting gary get his foot in the door, because it’s still early days, and i wouldn’t have done it any differently.

you: well, i am proud of you for sticking to your guns, but you might’ve just gone all in on gary.

marisol: ugh, you might be right, babe. on the bright side, he was quite receptive of the pupusas i made for him, we even had a nice chat on his bed while he ate them.

you: oh? so do you think your foot’s in gary’s door too?

marisol: i mean, who’s to say? we had a lot to talk about... he likes to read non-fiction books about white collar financial crimes, so i guess it’s confirmed he actually is as down-to-earth as he says, and not a delusional wall street wannabe. or an airheaded chav.

you: right... but that is an interesting hobby for a crane operator.

marisol: well, he’s an interesting bloke. and he really tries super hard to connect with whoever he’s talking to. that’s probably why hannah was gushing about them being suddenly so compatible last night; he must’ve been sharing her interest in books and family life.

you: bless her heart, but, the two of them couldn’t be any more different.

marisol: yeah, he said he felt really guilty after talking to her for a while. probably even more so today, since he’s had to tell her he doesn’t like avocado toast.

ibrahim: are you girls almost done over there?

ibrahim’s voice tore through the invisible divider and beckoned you both back over to him.

ibrahim: look, marisol, when i get frustrated i tend to just shut off, cos i’m not the best at choosing my words. i was just a bit wounded by the idea of you ditching me for gary, and then it seemed like you weren’t taking my feelings about it into account. but, i haven’t been too pleasant either, and i’m willing to apologize so we can try to put this behind us.

marisol: wow, rahim, that’s very sweet of you. and rather mature. i’m sorry too, but, i hope we can have more candid chats like this in the future. open communication about your feelings is the healthiest thing for a couple, you know.

ibrahim flashed a quick, toothy grin as he headed off inside.

marisol: “wounded”? that choice of words was actually impressive, if you ask me.

she leaned into you, the two of you giggling like the school girls you so dreaded becoming. although, the relief you felt at marisol finally getting somewhere with the guy she liked, overruled all else. plus, marisol had a way of making drama entertaining. you at least hoped that rahim would figure this out before the recoupling, as you remembered how much he seemed to like joking around with priya. and at this sudden mental mention of priya, you realized you’d never found her.

you: you know what’s even more impressive? that i haven’t done anything i set out to for today. including having my morning cuppa.

you promptly excused yourself and set off for the kitchen, silently praying that priya would magically appear next to the coffee pot before you got there. the only people you could see, were sitting with their backs facing you on the barstools. upon closer inspection, it was lottie and rocco, both huddled over a single mug.

you: what's all this then?

lottie: oh, (Y/N)! lemme fix you a coffee, babes.

you: wow, lottie, i was just about to make some. you totally read my mind.

lottie: oh, nonsense. mind-reading isn’t real. but, if you let me read your coffee grounds, i might be able to tell you a little something about your future.

you sent rocco a quizzical glance.

rocco: i hear ya, (Y/N).

lottie: hear what? don’t you two start snickering just yet.

finding another clean mug, lottie poured you a serving from the pot which was still warm, the specific brew having a pile of fine grounds that had sunk to the bottom. it was a bit unusual to have to drink around them, but you were just glad for the caffeine boost.

you: so rocco, have you had your future told already?

lottie: you’d get to hear yours sooner, if you sipped faster and talked less, (Y/N).

rocco: listen, lottie, i get that witchy stuff is your vibe. for me, tarot and astrology is about all i can stomach. this type of thing just seems sketchy to me - like it was made up by the coffee people.

lottie: the coffee people?

rocco: yeah, the people selling the coffee. seeing the future in your coffee grounds? seems like the sorta thing you’d make up to sell more coffee.

you let out an audible chuckle.

you: you’re so right, babes. capitalism ruins everything.

lottie: oh stop, (Y/N). as if you actually believe in “the coffee people”.

you allowed your grin to fade from your face, turning to rocco for reassurance, only to find him running a hand through his hair abashedly. rocco wasn’t known for being conventionally funny, but you had your fair share of laughs with him. although, from the way the atmosphere had suddenly shifted, you figured his dynamic with lottie was probably not very humorous.

with one last (and rather embarrassingly loud) gulp, you finished your coffee and handed it over to lottie. she softly and inaudibly clapped her hands a few times before taking the mug eagerly.

lottie: alright, this is good. we’ve got the right amount of grounds for a reading.

she placed the mug in front of you again, to your bewilderment.

lottie: just hold the mug to your chest and swill it clockwise three times. then you need to flip it over really quickly.

you followed her orders as she looked on to examine your work. her expression had suddenly gone from giddy to stern and analytical, clearly taking her fortune-telling practices very seriously. rocco tried to follow along, but was distracted shortly after by other commotion in the back garden.

dumping the grounds from your mug onto the counter, lottie finally got to work inspecting the shape of the pile.

lottie: ok babes, all you have to do now is think of something you want. don’t tell me what it is, but, the patterns i see in the coffee grounds will pertain to whatever you’re thinking of.

searching the labyrinth of your mind palace, you hit a familiar roadblock: the fact that you didn’t want for much. of course, your life on the outside wasn’t perfect, but you prided yourself on your stoicism to a degree. it would always be true that aspects of your life could be improved, but you were never one to waste time chasing things that would only prove to be negligible improvements - negligible improvements that didn’t serve to improve you. and thus, you were perfectly content rolling with the punches, for the longest time simply allowing the natural course of the universe to make changes to your life for you.

but, as you had quickly realized on the first day, love island was a game you applied for. you chose to go to the villa, and agreed to have it all put on national television. it was possibly the first time in your life you’d so actively changed your own situation. you tried to remember why, but the answer was perhaps buried too deeply in the maze. when you first met the other girls, they’d all proclaimed their commitment to finding love in the villa. and - romantically or not - you acknowledged that leaving this experience having built real connections with people, was undoubtedly the most you could hope for.

you just couldn’t see yourself falling in love on love island though, especially with the way things were going for you thus far. you could never picture yourself as the romantic lead, because you had always been an extra. so, as you were used to doing when reality became too grim, you found a different, more lighthearted angle. an angle which made your role more akin to an outside observer, rather than simply an outsider. had anyone in the history of the show, ever taken the entire cash prize for themselves?

that, you decided, was what you wanted.

lottie: got something, hun?

with your lips pressed tightly together from being engrossed in thought, you nodded earnestly.

lottie: ok, from what i’m seeing so far, this big blob in the middle is like a mountain. and there’s no way around it. whatever you’re thinking of, you’re gonna have to skirt some major obstacles to get it.

you: no kidding.

you exhaled deeply from your nose, feeling all too used to having your ambitions squashed.

rocco: if you’re done, darling, allow me to clean this up.

lottie: aw, babes. you don’t actually mind, do you? i told hannah we’d chat before the recoupling.

he gestured playfully toward the door in response, prompting lottie to skip inside, clutching her personalized water bottle. you put your elbow on the countertop, your chin resting on your fist as rocco collected some napkins to clean with.

you: so... that was interesting.

rocco: (Y/N), mon cherie, that was just a bit of fun. the only way to find out what our futures hold, is to follow the natural course of the universe.

you mentally cursed rocco for retroactively making your inner monologue sound so pretentious.

you: did she do yours too?

rocco: yeah. honestly, that’s how i know this stuff is rubbish. the only thing i could think of wanting was to go back to shanghai and nab a fresh set of bamboo paint brushes. the coffee grounds said i’d do it within the year, but i literally can’t. my visa expired. i’m locked out the country.

you held in a laugh.

rocco: i’m serious as a heart attack, (Y/N)!

he was talking through giggles too. rocco wasn’t necessarily the most pragmatic of the boys, but when he had to be matter-of-fact, he was almost comically so.

you: is that the backstory behind the...

you let your sentence trail off as you pointed to your shoulder; the spot on rocco that housed a large tattoo of a chinese character.

you: you know it means “soup”, right?

rocco: very good! i got it on a dare. i stayed with a host family and the little brother was such a trickster. loved that kid though. and i don’t mind the ink cos it reminds me of how fun it was studying abroad. it was the first time i traveled on my own, and as soon as i came back home, i realized it was all i wanted to do.

as your mind made the connection, remembering that marisol had told you an abridged version of rocco’s uni story that morning, you almost didn’t notice rocco go silent.

rocco: i guess that’s obvious by looking at me.

he chuckled again, but you felt yourself becoming sorry for him.

you: we don’t have to keep on this subject if you don’t want, but, you’re worldly, rocco. and that’s worth more than a little piece of paper, telling you you’re smart just because you paid a bunch of money.

rocco paused, his lips pulling to one side in a cheeky smirk.

rocco: i never said i didn’t get the diploma.

your cheeks flushed hot, as you attempted to diffuse his potential anger with a half-baked joke.

you: i saw it in the coffee grounds...

rocco scoffed in amusement, and finally done with the mess on the countertop, he leaned his torso against the kitchen island. his arms folded over his toned chest, facing you but allowing his eyes to stare off into the distance.

rocco: i get it, you and marisol are probably talking a lot about us boys. what with the recoupling tonight and all.

you: well, even so, i do apologize for gossiping. and i’m really finding out these past few days that i can’t keep a secret...

rocco: you gotta keep your cards close to the chest, (Y/N), don’t let the other players know your next move!

you: does that mean you’re gonna keep me out of the loop until tonight?

rocco: honestly, there’s nothing to report in my camp.

furrowing his eyebrows in what appeared to be genuine unease, he looked around in every direction, before leaning in and continuing with a hushed tone.

rocco: i haven’t really made my mind up yet. i’d like to get to know all of the girls equally first.

you: and you didn’t want lottie hearing you saying that?

rocco: i know i called you a smart cookie before, but it really doesn’t take a genius to see how possessive she is. i like her, all things considered. it’s just a bit full-on for the third day.

you: well, she did tell me that all of her ex’s turned out to be tools. maybe, if she’s had bad experiences with cheaters, she’s probably just really wary of wandering eyes.

rocco: but, don’t you ever think that it takes a little wandering, to be able to know where you’re truly at home?

you: everyone’s different, i guess. lottie might not feel the same, but you’re not wrong for thinking that way.

rocco: well, lottie would be right to be suspicious of a guy for talking to so many other birds at once... if it wasn’t love island, of course.

you: if it wasn’t the third day of love island, for that matter. hopefully though, if all goes well tonight, she’ll have plenty of time to adjust to the weird rules of this parallel universe.

rocco: (Y/N), i could literally sit here for hours discussing parallel universes with you... but, speaking of hope-fully...

rocco pointed a finger towards the gazebo behind your back, from which you saw hope headed your way. behind her, noah was left swinging lazily on the wooden bench swing, enjoying the shade alone. he sent you a halfhearted wave once he saw you looking, his posture perhaps too slumped to manage a full one. as you turned back to rocco, his eyebrows were raised and his face overall formed an uncharacteristically sardonic expression.

rocco: i’m off then.

his voice was almost a whisper, briskly taking off for the pool area, and not even making an effort to greet hope as she arrived in the kitchen. although the intricacies of the other islanders’ relationships continued to astound you, your brain couldn’t connect the dots fast enough before hope broke your concentration.

hope: (Y/N), babes, is now a good time?

you: i mean, you just wanted to pull me for a chat, right? what’s up?

hope: hun, this is more than “just” a chat. this is a very important chat. i’m here to tell you to get your head in the game, and prioritize your own survival!

you: ok... i suppose that’s not bad advice.

hope: babes, this is not the time for sarcasm! ok, first thing’s first, we’ve gotta figure out who your first choice boy is.

keeping in mind what hope had just said, you tried your hardest not to do anything sarcastic, which meant that you couldn’t muster a response at all. hope sighed exaggeratedly.

hope: alright, fair enough. the heart wants what it wants. but, why don’t you think about bobby for a second? where are things with him at the moment?

you: well, i guess they were going quite well, before he coupled up with priya. i honestly haven’t really seen him since. i can only imagine he’s liking his new couple more, but i couldn’t say for certain.

hope: right, and you want a guy who’ll take time out of his busy schedule - of lounging around and doing nothing - to actually check in with you.

you: i mean, yeah, but to be fair it has only been a few hours since then.

hope: (Y/N)! stop being so rational! the heart wants what it wants, and what it wants right now, is to not get dumped first!

sensing your tolerance for this conversation waning, hope toned herself down slightly and tilted into you.

hope: babes, i don’t wanna see you get dumped first. you’re reasonable, you’re level-headed. i know you can handle the truth, which is why i’m giving you this advice. you’ve gotta take stock of your options, hurry up, and stick it on a guy you can see yourself growing fond of. cos my guy isn’t an option for you this time round. maybe it’s blunt, but it’s the reality of the situation.

your neck and ears became warm, your head filling with frustration at the constant flack you received from lottie and hope. though you only allowed yourself to shrink in your seat, not wanting a repeat of night one, when you thoroughly embarrassed yourself by confronting lottie. even if your anger was justified, the burden of trying to explain your perspective was too great. with a quick exhale, you resolved to remove yourself from the situation, standing up and giving the countertop a light smack to signal that you’d reached your limit.

you: thanks for saying all that, i guess. don’t wanna keep being the wet blanket though, so why don’t i just go speak to someone else, and you and noah can get back to your blissful... whatever it is you were doing. without my presence intruding.

hope: (Y/N), wait.

her expression softened, to a level you’d never seen before. she looked around anxiously, bouncing in place gently with her hip, almost as if to soothe herself.

hope: i know i can be a bit extra sometimes, and i guess the way i’ve been talking to you - and about you - isn’t the most friendly. the truth of it is, when i first stepped into the garden and realized you’d chosen the guy i wanted, i was terrified. even though i have a bunch of guy friends, i really struggle to form romantic connections with guys. so i put all my energy into trying to guard what i have with noah, and i can’t lie, i would’ve been ok with staying frosty to you all summer long if that’s what it took. but i’ve really grown to respect you, (Y/N); the way you help the other girls, and how practical you are about the competition. you’ve got a good head on your shoulders, and i’d be lying if i said i wouldn’t want a mate like you.

you: wow, er, i don’t know what to say.

hope: i’ll still be frosty sometimes though, cos if i’m not feeling someone, i tell it like it is.

you: right...

you were unsure as to whether or not hope was trying to walk back the pseudo-apology she’d just delivered. there was seemingly a mental barrier, when it came to her rivalry with you, that she was unwilling to break down. while you were optimistic about finally forming a friendship with her, you couldn’t allow yourself to overlook the hostility that still oozed from her every word.

you: listen, babes, i wanna be mates with you too. it’d be a shame if we couldn’t at least be friend-ly by the end of the summer. but for right now, i’m single, it’s only day three, and i have no loyalties to anyone. i’m just gonna keep doing me, and i’m sorry if i’m stepping on your toes, but at the same time... i’m not, really.

any trace of a smile was swiftly erased from hope’s face, although the rush of gratification you got from finally speaking your mind was too distracting. you felt your posture straighten up a bit, as hers stiffened.

hope: alright then. good to have things in open at least.

having barely finished her sentence, hope hastily brushed past you. though, she wasn’t headed back to noah, as you expected. she simply barreled on forward, disappearing inside the villa. sympathizing was the wave of emotions she must’ve felt, you soon realized that you’d essentially given the standard love island villain speech; where they brag about wanting to cause chaos and step on the toes of the apparently happy couples.

to a certain extent, as the only single person, you reasoned that it was now your role to act as the villain - assuming hope viewed herself as the protagonist. and so fittingly, that was when noah caught your attention.

noah: psst!

he called out to you from the swing bench, whisper-yelling playfully. you sighed, readying yourself to play the other woman once more, as noah cordially patted the spot next to him.

noah: so, how was boy talk?

he was clearly asking in a joking manner, though you didn’t buy that he couldn’t tell how poorly that conversation went.

you: do you really wanna know?

your tone shifted back to your trademark sarcasm, eliciting a breathy chuckle from noah.

noah: it was kinda my idea for her to talk to you. we both agreed it would be sad if you went home tonight.

you: hope did say something along those lines. i suppose i didn’t say “thank you” outright, but, it’s nice to think that other people use some of their brain power on me.

noah: of course. you’re a great girl and everyone here loves you. i think you deserve to find what you’re looking for in here.

perhaps following a bad habit of not accepting compliments too gracefully, you opened your mouth to start to reply, but you reminded yourself of what noah had said about silence. silence was a form of closeness to him. and with the shade, the cool breeze, and the quiet lingering around you both as the others carried on laughing and splashing in the pool, you felt exceptionally close to him.

noah: she told me she only does that leg shaking thing when a situation’s really awkward.

the subsequent tension that built up due to the silence, was promptly destroyed. noah was serene and collected as he casually admired his fresh manicure in a beam of sunlight.

you: well, she’s normally so confident. i guess when you hang around me for too long, the forces that be decide you ought to get a taste of my natural awkwardness.

noah: that couldn’t have been easy for you, though. i only realized recently, but things have been a bit rocky between you two, huh?

you shook your head faintly, lamenting your position.

you: i really try so hard... to be nice and to have things feel comfortable with people. but she hates me. two people here have hated me since day one, and because of the game, i don’t think i’ll ever be able to change their minds.

noah: it’s not about changing their minds, though. you just gotta recognize that your actions and their reactions exist on opposite planes. the game is designed so that you piss people off, purely by taking care of yourself. if you don’t, you get dumped.

you: then i suppose we’ll see how well i’ve played the game tonight. if i don’t get the axe at this recoupling, i really don’t know if can handle more of this drama.

noah turned his head to face you, his eye smile forming crescents, as he wore a benign grin. he certainly seemed to have an ease about him that you couldn’t understand.

noah: what happened to knowing you’re top pick for some of the boys? you know, they like you cos you’re confident.

you: well then, they must see something i don’t, cos i’ve never been a confident person. i’m like... barely a person.

noah: (Y/N), you can’t talk about yourself like that if you wanna truly experience what this place has to offer. allow yourself to live in the moment, and you’ll form deeper connections that way. someone will pick you.

noah got up and stretched, signaling that he was about to leave, though he paused before actually turning away. his face informed you that he had something more to say.

you: someone?

you tried to nudge him into divulging. he sighed and faced the ground.

noah: i’m picking hope. i told her i would, and i’m sticking to my word. i know how much work it takes to make a relationship last, and she’s done her fair share. it’s only right that i give things a chance.

you: it sounds like you still don’t know if you like her.

noah: i do like her. i respect her a lot. she chose me, and she fought for me, i can tell she really values the time we spend together. that’s not the sort of thing you find every day.

you stood up from the bench too, your lips quivering slightly as you attempted to look noah in the eye. he was much taller, and as soon as your gaze landed on his warm, apologetic stare, you could only look away.

you: no one else chose you. right.

the mid-afternoon glow of the sun made the hairs on your arms stand up as you hurried away, traveling through a cloud of sweet perfume upon entering through the back door. it was almost time for the recoupling and your senses were overloaded.

it seemed that the odds were not only against you, but attacking you from every direction.

[mybedroomceilingsbored]

thanks @wisteria-angel-xox!!!

A- all of the stars by Hayd

B- beautiful things by Benson Boone

C- carry you by Novo Amor

D- dear by cavetown

E- everywhere, everything by Noah Kahan

F- focus by ghost toast

G- ghost of chicago by Noah Floersch

H- habits by Genevieve Stokes

I- illicit affairs by Taylor Swift

J- juliet by cavetown

K- kalmia kid by Chloe Moriondo

L- lemons by Woodlock

M- motion sickness by Phoebe Bridgers

N- nobody by Hozier

O- older by Lizzy McAlpine

P- paper planes by Elina

Q- question... ? by Taylor Swift

R- runaway by Aurora

S- summer depression by girl in red

T- therese by Maya Hawke

U- unknown/nth by Hozier

V- violet by Marianne Ross

W- where's my love-acoustic by SMYL

X- xanny by Billie Eilish

Y- you've got a friend in me by Cavetown

Z- i can't think of one so i'm cheating and saying Z-sides by Tom Rosenthall (an album, not a song)

moots: consider yourselves tagged

Lets make a list and for each letter you say s song. Here's mine:

A: Alaska - Toby Green remix by Toby Green and Maggie Rogers

B: Blush by Wolf Alice

C: Clearest Blue by CHVRCHES

D: Dead Air by CHVRCHES

E: Enchanted (Taylor's version) by Taylor Swift

F: Fall In Love With A Girl by Cavetown and Orla Gartland

G: Getaway Car by Taylor Swift

H: heart by flor

I: It Takes A Fool To Remain Sane by Omar Rudberg

J: July by Noah Cyrus

K: Karma by Taylor Swift

L: Lonely Ones by Lova

M: Mi Casa Su Casa by Omar Rudberg

N: National Anthem by Lana Del Ray

O: Out of My League by Fitz and The Tantrums

P: Paper Mache World by Matilda Mann

Q: Queen Of Kings by Alessandra

R: Revolution by Elias

S: Simon's Song by Omar Rudberg

T: The Most Beautiful Boy by The Irrepressibles, Felsmann + Tiley

U: ur so pretty by Wasia Project

V: vampire by Olivia Rodrigo

W: we fell in love in october by girl in red

X: xanny by Billie Eilish

Y: Young by Neon Capital and Kinck

Z: Zombie by The Cranberries

(I'm sorry if my english is really bad, english is not my first language)

Feel free to join in! 💖💞💫

Tags:

@aliceoseman @artsimmys @ani-bunnie13 @apersononearth011 @allaboutbethsblog @skateisawesome @late--night--melancholy @spring-siblings @imauselessartist @im-a-slut-for-subway-sandwiches @doin-ur-mum