#no one talk to me about how it's nice they stayed just friends they are in love and no i do not take criticism on that
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Holy shit, reading all of this just felt so damn good. I'm blind in my left eye and need glasses to see through my right, so reading other's experiences with only one functioning eye is...nice.
I thought I might share some of my experiences, because I don't really think too much about it honestly, I just know how things go for me because being half-blind is my normal.
Slopes and uneven ground are the worst. Walking is more than just seeing the ground in front of you, its also feeling it with your feet. When just out and about during the day, I can see just fine, but I do need/prefer stable ground because my depth perception is off and my balance is shit. So when dealing with say, a hill or holes i nthe ground, I take it slower, feel out each step because I can't tell how deep something is by just looknig down at it.
My night vision is also...not a thing, lol! I've gone out at night before, but would have to rely on having a torch (flashlight for you americans) with me and point down at my feet so I can see where I'm walking. For real, one time when I was walking home i nthe dark I accidently stepped onto the curb of the road because I couldn't tell I was veering that close to it, but I course corrected pretty quick. Because of my shit night-vision, we've got a motion-sensor light in the hallway for me, and I have a little lamp in my room for whenever I need to get up in the middle of the night. I don't necessarily need to turn a room's light on to see, I just need enough to tell where I'm going because gonig from darkenss with some light to full on "let me turn the bathroom light on for you" means I need to take like..ten, twenty seconds for my eyes to adjust to the suddenly bright light flooding my vision.
I'm not sure if this next thing is because I'm half-blind, or just a me thing, but I tend to not do well with navigation or cluttered environments. For example, If I need to find a phone on a table covered in clutter, you can see it, its right there surrounded by other things, but its there. I cannot see it, its not in an obvious spot where I could notice it at first glance, there's too many things, even if you point it out to me, I would still have trouble finding it. This applies to video games too! I often get lost in video games, or need my friend to point out something I missied because I just don't notice it amongst everything else.
I hate bright light. I'm very sensitive to bright light to the point most of the curtains in my home are closed, I wish real life had a brightness setting, and sunlight glinting off cars on a sunny day is my own personal hell. I've gotten flashbanged walking into the bathroom a couple of time because Mum opened all the curtains in there for important reasons I can't remember (like, she did close them later on, they are normally closed but sometimes they're open if the windows need to be cleaned or something).
People think I'm more blind than I am at first. When they first learn I can't see out of one eye, they assume I need to have things pointed out to me, like "watch out for the step/curb." when its during the day... I can see just fine, that's what the glasses are for. Yeah I can't see shit at night and will let people know that, but I know what I can and can't do...it's like people take a bit of time to really get the message that only under certain conditions do I need help and can manage the rest of the time perfectly fine on my own.
I prefer to have people walk on my blind side, because that's the side I'm keeping a closer eye on, so its easier for me to walk and talk with someone if they stay at my left.
Let's see what else? I do the head turning thing too! Its way easier and less eye strain to just turn my head towards something to look at it.
With my vision being the way it is I need to be mindful of what videogames I play. Yeah there's the obvious thing of most horror games are out because I would need to crank up the brightnesn super high and its frustrating not being able to see shit, but there's also ui elements to take into consideration. If a game uses small font, or a small hud, that's just eye strain and a headache waiting to happen. I've bought games wheere I;ve had to stop laying them because the console ports just aren't made for people like me who need larger font sizes and ui scaling, and I don't play PC because my laptop isn't a gaming one, and its much more comfortable for me to play console games because my large tv means less eye strain because its a bigger screen.
Speaking of the laptop! I wish most sites were zoom-friendly...like I need to have my web browser set to be zoomed in because again, I need the larger font and ui elements even when browsing the web. Most of the sites I frequent are fine with this (namely tumblr and AO3) but some of the sites i do use aren't zoom firendly and I have to zoom out to use the site properly, and that means tiny font and stress because I have my shit zoomed in for a fucking reason! but no, a lot of sites just don't do well with the fact that I have stuff zoomed in at 90 or 100%, like they weren't desinged to be used with zoom or larger fonts in mind.
I have to write my fanfics with font size 22 or 24 and then scale it down to a more presentable size 16 when I want to share previews of what I'm writing via google docs. Thankfully I don't have to worry about doing this on AO3.
Some of this wound up being a little bit ranty, don't take it too seriously, its just little things that frustrate me sometimes.
Stuff about having monocular vision that people don’t know (in my experience)
1. You only ever sit on one side of a room. (Especially if you’re in class) If you’re blind in your left eye like me, you sit to the left of the room so your right eye has the greatest scope, and there’s not much to your left to look at.
2. Harder time seeing past obstacles. People with two eye vision have the perception of both their eyes blend together for one image. Without this, you only have one eye, so you’re don’t get to see past obstacles the same way. For example if something is blocked for your right eye and not for your left, you can still see it through your left. For people with monocular vision this isn’t possible.
3. People don’t walk on the side of your blind eye. It may just be me, but because I’m blind in my left eye I tend to accidentally bump into people if they’re on my left. So when people walk beside me I naturally go so they’re to my right, or they do, without it being discussed.
4. 3D movies are headaches. Even though we’ve progressed past the red-blue type glasses, 3D just doesn’t work well for monocular vision. (And you know those fun optical illusions? A lot of them don’t work at all- nothing happens!)
5. Things like grabbing a pencil without looking at it are extremely difficult. (Due to lack of depth perception, you have a hard time discerning where things are in 3D space). This also stretches to having bad posture and balance. Meanwhile, things that are flat are relatively easy.
6. You turn your head when you’re looking at something, so your good eye is focused on it. This includes tilting your head at worksheets, TVs, and computer screens- and also people.
7. Seeing in the dark is also much harder, because people rely on their depth perception for it, and without that stuff gets real hard
8. The headaches. Most people with blindness don’t experience total blindness, but instead low vision, where their vision is not able to be used in a way that’s helpful. Your brain tries to merge the images, or use your bad eye to see something in the peripheral. This just makes your head hurt. Much like people who need time to adjust to having glasses due to the headache, getting headaches is common because your vision is always at odds.
9. More susceptible to eye damage. Since you’re not overly aware of your bad eye, you may not notice if the sun is shining directly at it. I tend to squint with my bad eye whenever I’m outside, without thinking about it. Additionally, you’re more wary of anything that could damage your good eye. It’s the only one, so you gotta be careful with it.
10. Also, it makes things really, really weird if there’s a bright light from one side but not from another. There are often after images that float in my vision.
11. Looking at things that are moving can be hard. I can focus on an object, but if a camera is panning in some direction without being focused on one thing in particular, I just stop being able to make sense of what I’m seeing. It becomes very jarring.
12. Sometimes it’s not that your eye necessarily has anything wrong with it, but that your optic nerve isn’t fully connected. So the eye may be healthy, but your brain shut it off, and the connection between the light coming in your eye, and the way the brain interprets it, never fully formed. Funnily enough, I’ve heard that this can cause the connection between your good eye and your brain to be stronger, as it is with mine. For some people it’s the opposite, and it makes both of their eyes worse. Peoples experiences can really differ.
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When Love is Left Unspoken pt. 2 (MV)
max verstappen x reader
pt. 1 here
I could be talked into a pt. 3 if people want it
It had been a week since the Austin GP and forgetting about what happened had been impossible mostly because Max would not leave you alone.
He didn't reach out directly, but every morning this week, you had woken up to a new gift outside your door. Flowers, chocolate, coffee, pastries, clothing, etc. You had no idea how he even knew your address.
You struggled with what to do. On one hand, you had missed your best friend for a long time. You missed the inside jokes, the comfort you found in him, and supporting one another. But on the other hand, you couldn't stop thinking about how he threw it all away because he was scared of loving you. You had never been scared of loving him, even if you never said. Well maybe that was hypocritical.
Saturday morning an envelope accompanied the box outside of your door. You opened the box first, revealing a vintage RedBull racing bomber jacket that cost who knows how much. It was cute, you'd give it that. Opening the envelope you froze as you read the letter that sat next to a paddock pass for the Brazil GP.
I know you hate me and you have a good reason to but I will do anything to have you back by my side even if you refuse to look at me. Please come to Brazil, I know it's your favorite track. You can stay on Checo's side of the garage if it makes you feel better.
Love, Your Max
Brazil was your favorite track and in the past you had always travelled down early to experience the culture for a bit before the racing started.
You facetimed Carmen, hoping to talk this through with someone else.
"Hey girl, what's up?" She asked, clearly in the middle of a workout.
"Oh, I can call later if you're busy," you said and she shook her head.
"No, it's okay!"
"Max invited me to the Brazilian GP," you told her slowly and her eyes widened.
"Wow."
"I know, I don't know what to do."
Carmen was silent for a little bit, clearly thinking. "Is there any part of you that wants to make up with him?"
"Yes," you admitted quietly. "But I hate myself for even thinking that. I don't want to just forget about everything that happened and take him back with open arms."
"I don't think you necessarily have to forget what happened but maybe focus on the people you both have grown to be in these last few years. Maybe treat it like you are starting over."
"So you think I should go?"
"Selfishly yes of course," she said grinning and you couldn't help but smile back. "You don't even have to spend time with him. Just see how it feels to be around him."
After hanging up with Carmen, you texted the number Max had given you for his assistant in order to get flights and a hotel figured out.
-----------------------------------
You landed in Brazil on media day and didn't plan on going to the track until Saturday. Max was pulling out all the stops even when he couldn't see you as evidenced by the ridiculously nice hotel he put you in. The view was amazing and laying on the bed was a variety of your favorite snacks and drinks with a card that read "I'm so glad you're here -your Max."
The 'Your Max' thing was working even though you hated to admit it. You spent the next two days traveling around the city by yourself and then with Carmen.
Saturday rolled around and you found yourself nervous to be at the paddock despite Carmen's constant reassurances. You hadn't seen Max yet and you weren't really sure what to say when you did.
Funny enough, the first person you ran into when you made it to the RedBull garage was Christian Horner.
"Y/n!" He said surprised to see you. "It's been a while, how are you? You know my wife is obsessed with your tik tok channel."
"Ahh tell her I said thank you," you replied kindly. "I've been doing well."
"We're glad to have you back," he said and your heart swelled. "It's been a rough year for him."
"I'm not sure I can change that," you said politely and he gave you a look.
"You just being here might," he commented before leaving you to go talk with the mechanics. You wandered around the garage, catching up with a lot of people you hadn't seen in a long time.
Max spotted you as he was coming out of his drivers' room and his heart stopped. Of course he knew you were in Brazil, but he still wasn't 100% sure you'd show up. He didn't think he should approach you so he just lingered by watching you. You felt him watching you and looked over at him, trying to control your breathing and gave him a small smile.
He smiled back before being called off to get ready for the sprint. Leaning against the back wall you pulled your headphones and settled in to watch. Max was doing pretty good, battling with Charles for most of the race. Your face appeared on the broadcast and you smiled to the camera, giving it a small wave.
After the race you checked your phone to see that you'd been tagged in countless tweets.
@.username12312: Was that y/n y/l/n in the RedBull garage? I thought her and Max had a falling out???
reply to @.usernam12312 @.user345: Yeah they haven't been friends for a long time. It had something to do with Kelly
reply to @.user345 @.username12312: oh yeah, you're right! I always liked y/n better anyways
You were amused reading the speculation and decided to stir the pot further. While Max was doing interviews you found Checo in the garage and asked him to take a picture with you. The confused man agreed and you quickly posted it to your Instagram story with the caption: My favorite RedBull driver, good luck tomorrow!
Carmen and Lily both slid up with laughing emojis and you walked back to Max's side, trying to avoid the rain. It was really coming down now and you weren't sure if they would even be able to go out on the track. You found Max a little while later sitting against the wall, legs sprawled out in front of him. You sunk down next to him, holding your knees into your chest.
"Think you'll be able to go out there today?" You asked casually and he looked over at you, clearly excited to hear you speaking to him.
"I would say probably not," he replied. "Maybe tomorrow morning."
"How much longer until we know?"
"Another half hour would be my guess," he said. "I can call for someone to take you back if you want to leave now?"
"No, I'll wait," you said looking down at your phone. You sat in silence for a while and the rain was starting to make you very sleepy. Losing the battle with yourself, you rested your head on Max's shoulder and he stiffened.
Max smiled to himself as you dozed off and the two of you caught the attention of the cameras, the photo soon to be splashed everywhere online. Quali was called off and Max nudged you awake, reaching out to help you up.
"Ride with me back?" He asked hopeful and you nodded. You ran into George and Carmen on the way out and she gave you a knowing look to which you rolled your eyes at.
"You guys should come out to dinner with us," George said. "We're meeting up with Alex and Lily too."
You hesitated, not wanting to miss out but at the same time your social battery was dead. You could only handle so much social interaction before you were craving your warm bed to snuggle into. You started to give in and agree but Max cut you off.
"I think y/n is done being around people for the day so I'm going to take her back."
You looked at him surprised and the realization that he still knew you so well just added more fire to the internal turmoil you were facing. Bidding them goodbye, you followed Max out of the paddock and into the car he had rented for the weekend. The car ride was silent as well as the elevator ride up to your floor.
Max followed close behind you as you made your way to your room and it was starting to irritate you.
"You don't need to walk me to my room Max," you said and he looked at your sheepishly.
"I'm in the one right next to you."
"Are you fucking serious?" You asked frustrated. "I need space Max!"
"I just want you to be safe," he defended and you rolled your eyes.
"From what?" You exclaimed. "Oh yeah, your girlfriend I mean ex-girlfriend is from here. Think she's sending people after me?"
"I don't think that's funny," he said, eyes darkening. "Sue me for wanting you close to me. I'm not going to apologize for that."
"You are the worst," you bit out before shoving into your room, slamming the door.
---------------------------------------
Stepping out of the steaming shower and back into the bedroom you glanced worriedly out the window. You wouldn't necessarily say that you had a fear of thunderstorms but they tended to make you uneasy.
Trying to distract yourself you put on South Park, your favorite show to watch in a hotel, but it didn't work. After a couple of booms you were still on edge. Sighing you got up and left your room, hoping a small walk around the hotel would ease your mind. By the time you made it back, Max was leaning against the wall by your door, waiting for you.
"Can't sleep?" He asked and you nodded.
"The storms."
"You always were scared of them," he teased and you scoffed.
"I'm not scared of them!" Right as you said that, a streak of lighting flashed by the hallway's window followed by a loud crash of thunder. You jumped a little and Max smirked.
"Come on," he said gesturing back to his room. You hesitated and he sighed. "We both know you won't fall asleep alone to this."
Giving in, you followed him into his room. It was a carbon copy of yours and you were amused to see South Park playing on his tv. He climbed into his bed but you stopped short; the scene in front of you reminded you of so many times before. When you traveled with him back in the day you'd often find yourself in his room at night hanging out. You always fell asleep and woke up in his arms, neither of you ever saying anything about it.
Max sat up in the bed looking at you, he knew what you were thinking.
"Y/n," he said softly as he watched you wipe a tear from your eye.
"This is so hard Max," you said, voice breaking. "How am I supposed to just forget?"
"I don't know," he confessed. "I'm sorry."
"It's not even like you broke my heart that day," you said meeting his eyes. "You had chipped away at it for so long that there wasn't even anything left to break."
Max's heart dropped and he moved over closer to where you were standing, so that you were now eye level.
"I was so scared back then y/n," he said and you put your head into your hands. "So scared of failing that I did things I shouldn't have done, like pushing you away to protect myself."
"Protect yourself from what?" You said, looking back at him.
"Your unconditional love," he said sadly and you tried to compose yourself, taking a deep breath.
"You acted like nothing happened, I watched you move on with your life," you accused, whispering to him.
"I did not move on, I was a mess. I couldn't eat or sleep for months and I latched on to you in whatever way I could through your videos or podcast. Every picture or video you saw of me was strictly PR."
"But you never reached out, not once in these past few years," you said, starting to grow angry with him.
"Neither did you!" He exclaimed.
"That's not fair Max," you retorted, moving away from him.
"Isn't it though? You accused me of moving on but I watched you do the same. I watched your popularity grow, watched you start to travel around the world, watched you post with other guys. You didn't need me to be happy."
"I needed my best friend!" You yelled and he flinched. "I needed you to be there to call when I got a new deal! I needed you to be there to lean on when I had self doubt! You ruined everything Max. I could never be truly happy celebrating something because in the back of my mind I was thinking about how you should have been there with me!"
Max squeezed his eyes shut, sitting down on the bed.
"I don't know how to fix this schatje," he whispered and you flinched at the term of endearment. "Everything has been so dark for so long. I am okay with you hating me forever. Because even if you just look at me, it'll be a better day than what I've had."
Sniffling, you stared into his red rimmed eyes. "I want to forget about you so badly Max but I can't."
He smiled softly at you before patting the bed.
"Please sleep here tonight, it will make me feel so much better knowing you were well rested. I'll sleep on the pull out couch," he said standing up.
"Just sleep in the bed with me," you said sighing, wiping the tears from your face before climbing into the bed. Max slid in next to you, leaving a healthy distance between the two of you and you drifted off to sleep.
The sound of his alarm woke you up at 4:30 and you groaned sleepily. Max's arms were wrapped tightly around you, his head buried in your hair as he refused to open his eyes.
"Max, you have to wake up," you said and he mumbled incoherently into you. You pried his hands off your body and stood up, stretching. He watched you lazily from the bed, wondering if this was a dream.
"I'm going to go get ready and then I'll meet you back in the hallway in 30 minutes okay?" You asked him and he nodded. Leaving his room you headed back into yours to get ready for the day. Your eyes were still a little swollen from last night but that was nothing a little makeup couldn't fix.
Pairing the new RedBull jacket with a black jeans you gathered all your stuff before texting Carmen about what had happened last night. All she responded was that we would discuss it in person and sent a winky face.
Max looked more awake standing out in the hallway and you both left for the track.
Qualifying was a mess to put it simply. Crash after crash after crash. It was spiking your anxiety to watch and you were just praying that Max would make it out unscathed. He did make it without crashing, but not without controversy.
You grew furious as you watched everyone in Q2 get to finish their laps following Lance's crash except for Max and Esteban. This made him miss out on Q3 for the first time in forever. You knew he was pissed when he got out of the car and his eyes met yours for a brief second. He talked to his engineers before grabbing your hand to drag you with him to over where he had to do interviews.
Standing behind the reporter you watched him try to contain his anger.
“If a guy goes straight into the wall, it is a straight red,” he said. “I don't understand why you need to take 30, 40 seconds for a red flag to come out...”
His voice was rising as he said it and both you and the reporter braced for the impact of whatever he was going to say next. He started to say something but then looked over at you and stopped himself, taking a deep breath before waving off the question.
“I don’t care in all honesty, it is so stupid to talk about. It’s ridiculous.”
He answered a couple more questions about the race happening later and you waited patiently. Christian came to join you and gave you a knowing look.
"I told you that being here would make things better," he said with a glint in his eyes. "I'm giving you credit for him avoiding more community service."
Things got even better after that with Max winning the Grand Prix in what you could only describe as a complete masterclass.
As the celebrations wrapped up, you and Max found yourselves alone in the quiet of the garage, both still processing the day's whirlwind. He glanced at you, a hesitant warmth in his gaze.
Max reached for your hand, gently holding it, as if afraid you'd slip away again. "I'm glad you came, I've needed you here for a long time."
"I'm still not sure where we stand Max," you said unsure of how to deal with what you were feeling.
"As long as your standing next to me, I'll be okay," he said cheekily and you smiled. You knew that your relationship had a long way to go but maybe, just maybe, it was finally starting again.
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Funny How Time Flies
terry richmond x black, fem!/plus size reader
summary: you are a shy, introverted person who wants to break out of your shell and experience fun at least once in your life. During a mutual friend's group trip, you meet Terry and have the best sex with him. Once the fun is over, will you and Terry stay in touch?
warnings: explicit smut (18+), light use of daddy, foul language, dirty talking, dom/sub, oral (f), pussy slaps, fingering, unprotected sex, nicknames (beautiful, baby, baby girl), words: (3k)
note: hey, I'm working on another mini-series, but this one is sweet, wholesome, and freaky! let me know your thoughts and if you want to be tagged in future parts. please enjoy!
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You’ve been shy and introverted your entire life, often feeling tired of this loneliness. Your daily routine typically consists of working, exercising, and returning home, which leaves little opportunity for social interaction or adventure.
While you go out when you want to, most of your time is spent at home with your loving dog. Despite that, you know something is missing—particularly, a boyfriend and a more vibrant social life.
The anxiety stemming from your shyness made it difficult for you to step outside your comfort zone. You want to seek more experiences beyond the walls of your home and be more outgoing.
When your friends Sasha and Maya invited you on a group trip, you accepted. They were surprised but happy and reassured you that you wouldn’t feel left out or awkward during the trip.
Sasha, in particular, couldn’t contain her excitement, as explained by her boyfriend, Bryce. He was bringing his old marine friend, Terry Richmond.
You met the girls at the airport and greeted them with hugs. Sasha explained that Bryce and Cameron needed to find Terry, which made you feel nervous. She told you a little about him, but ultimately, you would have to form your own opinion about him.
"Oh, here they come! Finally,” Sasha replied, gesturing towards three tall, fit men in the distance.
Bryce was a tall, dark-skinned man, while Cam was kind of brown-skinned since he was lighter than Bryce. Then your eyes led to him. Who must be Terry?
At that moment, you felt an undeniable spark of love at first sight. Terry was slightly taller than Bryce and Cam and had a lighter skin tone.
He was so handsome, with good hands, good lips, and, good god, a nice body!!! He was fine, and you wanna intertwine him.
"Good, made it back on time and found big dawg," Bryce nudged Terry on the arm, laughed, and then moved over to Sasha.
"Yeah, bro was at the wrong damn gate/terminal," Cam said, walking over to Maya and greeted her with a kiss on the forehead.
"My fault; it's been a minute since I've been at the damn airport; y'all know I don't travel a lot," Terry chuckled lightly as he caught you staring, prompting you to look away.
"Well, we're glad you found him. Now...um, Terry, I want you to meet someone," Maya said with a smile.
He raised his eyebrows curiously and she motioned towards you and introduced you to Terry by using your name.
“Hey, there!” He said, giving a polite wave, and you just stared at him. Everyone looked at you, awaiting your response, but nothing came out until Sasha nudged you.
“Hi,” you said, waving back with a small mile. You held his gaze for a moment, feeling a flutter of nerves in your stomach, before shyly turning your eyes away.
The flight to Cancun, Mexico, is currently boarding for its scheduled departure at 1 PM. Passengers are advised to have their boarding passes and identification ready and to proceed to the gate promptly.
"Okay, that's us. Who's ready to get Lit?" Maya clapped her hands, easing the awkwardness and creating a more hype vibe.
Sasha wrapped her arm around your shoulders playfully, giving you a knowing look through her sunglasses.
"Look at you, drooling all over Terry already; I told you he would be your type," She teased, and you playfully hit her arm.
Soon enough, you were all on the plane, and of course, you were sitting next to Terry. He was talking to you, but you felt so nervous that your responses were short.
You both had a lot in common: you were single, didn’t get out much, and were on this trip to have fun. You couldn’t believe that a handsome man like Terry wanted to talk to you despite your shyness.
Terry was eager to talk to you from the moment he first saw you. He felt a strong connection and wanted to get to know you better. He was really glad he decided to go on this trip because your sweet and shy nature made him want to break you out of your shell.
“You're kind of the shy and quiet type, huh?! I like that; some people say I'm reserved, so I guess I can relate,"
"You don't seem like it; you seem like an outgoing person." You look at him for a second. His captivating hazel-green eyes burn into yours, causing a flutter in your chest.
"Well, I sometimes can be both; I'm a little reserved when I don't know the person, but if I know you, I'm more open, I guess," Terry explained, a hint of a smirk playing on his lips.
"What makes me so different?" You asked in a playful tone, building some confidence.
Terry laughs and smirks, "I guess you're that special!"
You felt like your heart exploded the way he looked at you, obviously attracted to you. You just nodded, looking away, trying to hide your smile.
“Hey....come on, I was just getting used to hearing that pretty voice of yours,” Terry said, leaning in, and your breath hitched.
You and Terry chatted throughout the entire plane ride. Although you were still a bit shy, you found yourself being more talkative than before, which felt positive.
Perhaps Terry was just what you needed for this trip. Once your group arrived at the stunning villa, you marveled at its beautiful interior.
“Alright,” Maya announced, her enthusiasm infectious as she gathered everyone to discuss the week's activities. She carefully ensured everyone felt included and excited about them.
Maya suggested you all chill and settle into our bedrooms for the afternoon. You began rolling your heavy suitcase down the hall, its wheels clicking softly against the floor.
“Do you need a hand?” Terry asked, approaching with a friendly smile and ready to help you with your suitcase.
"Yeah, thanks." You said with a small smile, walking to your bedroom door and walking in.
"You can put it right there, " You said, pointing at the chair before you and indicating that he should place it there. Terry glanced at you curiously as if he were too nervous to ask a question.
A moment of silent communication passes between you. Terry stepped forward, closing the distance, and you felt your heart race.
You instinctively wanted to shy away, but you fought against the urge, reminding yourself to be brave.
“I hope this doesn’t sound too forward, but I would love to take you on a date tonight. I am drawn to you and want to crack your shy shell and see what’s inside. Of course, only if you want me to," He expressed with a hopeful smile.
“I would love that, Terry,” You said with a smile. Terry smiled back, gave you his number, and set the date plans.
He walked out, winking at you as he left the bedroom. You bit your lip and excitedly squealed, jumping dramatically onto the comfortable bed.
-
You told the girls about the date, and they were so excited that they went upstairs to your bedroom to help you out.
“I don’t think I can do this; it's been so long since i've been on a date, and all together, I'm shy as fuck” You said, getting your nerves up.
“Babe, it’s fine. You need this, and Terry is an amazing guy. We wouldn't have brought him on this trip if we didn't know he would be perfect for you.” Sasha says, ease your anxiety a lot more.
“Sasha is right; just have fun and let go, but not too much; you might get dicknotized,” Maya smiles playfully as she hands you a sexy yellow dress that catches the light beautifully.
"This will look amazing on you," She added, her eyes sparkling excitedly. As you slipped into the dress, your nerves faded, replaced by a sense of pride.
Maya's perfume filled the room as she sprayed on you; it had a familiar and comforting aroma.
Sasha, the fashionista, was styling your box braids and applying your makeup while you looked in the mirror.
"Remember," She said, glancing over her shoulder, "confidence is key. Just be yourself."
After saying bye to Sasha and Maya, you closed the door behind you and took a deep breath. You were walking downstairs and Terry stood there at the bottom, clearly waiting for you.
His eyes widened, taking in every detail. You couldn't help but giggle at his look of awe. He seemed captivated by your radiant beauty, his gaze lingering on your elegant curves.
“Wow, you look beautiful,” Terry said. You smiled and looked him over, noticing he was wearing a black button-up shirt and shorts.
"Thank you. Um..you look beautif-I mean handsome!" You cursed at yourself in your mind, feeling totally embarrassed, and Terry found it cute.
"Thanks! Are you ready?" Terry asked, holding his arm out with a smile and you happily accepted.
Both of you walk leisurely down the path, arm in arm while listening to the gentle sound of waves crashing against the shore accompanies you as you make your way to the charming ocean-view restaurant that overlooks the sparkling waters.
You and Terry walk inside, and the warm glow of the intimate setting welcomes you. You find a cozy table for two awaiting your arrival. Moments later, a friendly waiter approaches, ready to take your drink orders.
While waiting, Terry struck up a conversation that flowed effortlessly. His warm smile and engaging demeanor made it easy to share about yourself. With every exchanged joke and smile, you found yourself becoming more comfortable, as if he had a talent for bringing out the best in people.
His smooth charm was evident; he made you feel special and understood, gently encouraging you to step out of your shy little shell and embrace the moment because the air between you crackled with sexual tension, growing palpable by the minute.
The waiter approached your table, balancing a tray of drinks that shimmered in the dim light. He set them down before you with a polite smile. After taking your food orders, he left you both.
Terry, his eyes sparkling, leaned in closer, a playful grin spreading across his face.
“While we wait, how about we play a game of ‘Would you rather?’” Terry proposed, the excitement in his voice making the suggestion feel inviting.
"Okay," You replied, intrigued and ready to dive into the game.
“Okay, would you rather…” Terry started, propping his chin on his hand as he contemplated the question.
“Would you rather live deep in the ocean or explore the vastness of space?”
You paused for a moment, considering the options carefully. “Hmm, that’s a tough choice. But I think I would choose space,” You finally replied.
“Mmm, interesting! What makes you lean toward space?” Terry inquired, leaning forward with curiosity.
“I have always been interested in space and astronomy. If I could, I would be an astronaut, and the experience would be exciting,” You said, taking a sip of your wine.
"Wow, I would love to learn more about that, but it's your turn," Terry said, his eyes lighting up with curiosity and a warm smile spreading across his face. The "Would You Rather" game had been going for a while and had taken a slightly naughty turn.
Before long, the waiter arrives with both of your meals, setting them down on the table with a flourish. As the delightful aromas fill the air, you take a moment to appreciate the dishes before returning to Terry.
Intrigued by the connection you two are building, you changed the subject wanting to know about Terry's interests and experiences, eager to learn more about his passions.
Terry paused mid-sentence, his gaze falling on your necklace, which had come unhooked. With a gentle smile, he leaned in close and secured the clasp.
You found yourself momentarily lost in the warmth of his touch, savoring the soft caress against your dark brown skin, a delightful contrast that sent a shiver of warmth through you.
Terry pulled away, a smirk playing on his lips, and effortlessly transitioned back into talking as if nothing had happened. You couldn't help but notice his subtle game; it was working on you like a charm.
Your desire was intense, and your craving seemed to deepen with every word he spoke. You were utterly captivated, wanting him more than ever before.
After dinner, you both walk silently side by side on the beach. Your hands nearly touch until Terry grabs yours and holds it, making you smile.
You slowly look up at him, and you find that his eyes are already fixed on you.
"What?" You asked.
"Just admiring how gorgeous you are," Terry stopped you from walking by wrapping his arms around your plump waist.
You touched his chest, thinking you both would finally kiss. But Terry was teasing you again. He lifted you slightly, catching you off guard and causing you to drop your purse and heels.
“Oh my goodness, what are you doing, Terry?” You gasped, struggling to escape his firm hold on you.
“Let’s get in the water; I bet it’s cold,” He said, trying to pull you closer.
“No, Terry!” You squealed, quickly breaking free from his grasp and running away from him with your tongue sticking out.
“Hey!” he yelled, chasing after you. When he finally caught you, he wrapped his arms around your waist from behind and started tickling you.
You bounced up and down with laughter, trying to escape his grip. Just as Terry was about to say something, he accidentally tripped over something in the sand. Both of you fell together. You looked at him, and he looked at you.
You both laughed as Terry rolled off of you, pulling you onto his chest and kissing the top of your head, making your heart flutter. He eventually helped you out of the sand and retrieved your purse and heels.
Feeling a surge of confidence, you leaned in and pressed your lips against his, surprising him with the suddenness of your action. As you pulled back, a shy smile crept onto your face, and you turned your gaze to the side, feeling excitement and nervousness.
In an instant, Terry reached out, his fingers gently cupping your cheek, drawing your attention back to him. His eyes searched yours, a blend of sweetness and warmth reflected in them.
Then, without breaking his gaze, he leaned in closer, his lips brushing softly against yours as he kissed you, igniting a flutter of butterflies in your stomach.
You let out a muffled moan, feeling his hands gliding over your ass with a gentle yet teasing touch. Your breath caught in your throat, pulling away while feeling him firmly grasping it.
"Do you wanna continue this back at the villa?" Terry asked, his eyes darkened with desire as he looked down at you.
"Yes," you said, nodding firmly as you still held the gaze. Your voice remained steady, even as a whirlwind of emotions surged within you—excitement, desire, and a hint of nervousness mingled together.
-
Once stepped into the bedroom, Terry pressed you against the solid door. His lips met yours in a passionate, rough kiss, feeling an electric spark hit and made your heart race.
"I've been waiting to take this dress off you since I saw you in it," He murmured in your ear, running his hands down the bodice of your yellow dress.
"And it's just driving me wild," He whispered, which made you shiver.
"Well, take it off if you're brave enough," You spoke boldly, which made him smirk.
You gasped as he lifted you in his arms and carried you to the bed. You still couldn't get over the fact that he was so strong to pick you up, which was a turn-on for you.
He picked you down as both of you stood at the edge of the bed; he was kissing your neck, and his lips peppered on your dark-brown skin, pausing here and there to suck on the sensitive flesh.
His hand reached behind your back to find the zipper of your dress, pushing it down to your feet. You step out of it, and his hands touch your exposed breasts.
As you stood there, a wave of insecurity washed over you, causing you to shy away slightly. Just when you thought about retreating and hiding yourself, Terry stopped you. His gaze was steady and inviting, searching your eyes.
"You're beautiful, baby. Don't hide from me!" He whispers genuinely, making you feel warm inside. You kiss him as his hands grip your breasts.
You let out a soft moan, pulling away and popping his black button-up shirt open. You admired his abs and slid your fingers down his chest.
Terry shivered slightly at your touch; you had the same effect on him as he had on you. Both of you practically ripped each other's clothes. You gently laid yourself down as Terry hovered above you.
You pulled him down for another kiss as he cupped your right breast in his hand while his lips moved away from yours. His tongue dragged across the dark area of your areola.
"Such nice big tits, so good to suck," Terry growls and grabs both of your breasts with his hand, squeezing and sucking them, causing you to whimper.
"How does that feel, baby?" He asked, pulling away from sucking your nipples as his right hand traveled down to your wet folds, and circled them.
A loud moan escaped your lips, felt him push two fingers inside of you, prompting you to cover your mouth to avoid being heard by the others.
"Nah, baby girl, none of that. You have no idea how desperate I want to hear you moan for me. If you don’t let yourself make any sounds, I’ll have to find a way to draw them out."
"Yes-yes....ohhhh....It-it feels good....ahh......so good," You moaned, feeling him moved below and rested between your plump legs, glancing up at you. He spread them wide, getting a good look at your pussy.
"Mmmm, a pretty girl with a pretty pussy" He said before placing his hands on your legs and dragging his tongue between your wet folds.
"Yes....fuck....ahh fuck" You moaned, arching your back and grabbing your breasts as he repeated the action with more pressure, his tongue sliding against your bundle of nerves.
"Mmm, tastes so damn good, girl" His hands were holding your wide hips as he continued to suck and lick you dry, drawing desperate soft moans from your mouth.
Terry buried deeper between your plump legs, which was driving you crazy. The pleasure you were feeling going through your body was so overwhelming.
"Ahh fuck, Terry fucking eat this pussy, mutherfucka" You moaned, and your fingers gently caressed his head, relishing the closeness of him.
Terry chuckles. "Mmm, there you go, keep talking nasty to me, baby. I see I'm bringing the best out of you, the freak in you," He said before resuming devouring your pussy.
Another loud moan escaped your lips as the pleasure built within you, clenching around his fingers while you felt yourself getting close.
"Are you gonna cum, beautiful?" He asked, moving up to look into your eyes and began to finger fuck you fast.
"Yes, Terry, oh shit.....fuck-fuck don't stop fuck." You cried, suddenly cumming hard, eyes rolling in the back of your head.
"Yeah, that's it, baby girl. Fucking cum for Daddy," Terry said, still fingering you and then smacking your pussy as wet gushing came out of you, causing you to cry.
"Shit, look at that, baby. And I did all that with my tongue and fingers; I can't wait to see how your pussy takes my dick" He said with a chuckle, licking his fingers, and you watched him coming down from your intense high.
You kissed him, slightly tasting yourself as he cupped your breast in his hand while your hand slid down his chest to his throbbing dick; you got a good look at it and gasped at it.
"Like what you see?" Terry whispered in your ear.
"Yes, it's so big," You moaned, moving your hand up and down his length as you kissed him again but deeply. A very deep moan came from his mouth when you got a little faster.
"Fuck, girl, I need you…" Terry said with a slight moan, which made you smile. He moved on top of you and slowly entered your folds, causing you to go bananas.
You were loving the fullness of his thickness inside of you as he began thrusting, drawing soft moans from you. Terry asked, looking down at you to see if it was good, but you nodded.
"Come on, baby. Don't get shy on me again; tell me how it feels?" He asked, his hands on your waist sliding down to grasp your wide hips, pulling you closer so he could bury himself deeper.
"Yes, Terry fuck me, fuck it feels good!" You moaned, wrapping your plump legs around his waist tighter, allowing a new, delicious angle that you both liked.
Your moans became louder and more frequent as his thrusts came faster but still as gently and passionately as ever.
"That's it, girl....let everyone know i'm fucking this pussy good, You like it, you like how I am fucking you" Terry moaned while his rhythm never stopped looking down at you with so much desire and lust;
"Oh yes, Daddy fuck me, it feels so good," You cried, looking up at him as he lifted your legs to his shoulders and pounding into you faster and harder but much more profound.
"Take that fucking dick like a good girl;" Terry growled, tightening his grip on your legs.
"....fuck are you about to cum, baby?" Terry moaned, feeling the warmth of your walls, clenched around him.
"Oh....yes, fuckfuckfuck..I'm-I'm cumming-" You moaned, digging your nails deep into his arms and scratching down.
"Fucking let it go, baby."
"AHHH!!" You screamed, coming hard again and Terry wasn't too far behind, cursing, pulling out; your legs immediately fell to his waist as his hot cum spurted all over your belly, making you slightly giggle.
"Shit," Terry cursed, lowered himself, and propped up on his left arm as his head buried in your neck.
He entirely collapsed on top of you, and you wrapped your arms around him. You slid your hand up and down his sweaty back while he gave you small, lazy kisses on your face and neck.
Terry rolls off you, and both of you calm down from your high. You bite your lip and turn to prop yourself up to look at him.
"That was—" You couldn't decide what word to use. It was beyond amazing, it was...
"Mind-blowing, yeah," He agreed, looking at you and lifting himself up to kiss you.
"Up for another round in the shower?"He asked, pulling away and caressing your hip.
"Yes!" Both of you smirked at each other and got out of bed to walk to the bathroom; Terry made you cum two more times that night.
#terry richmond x black reader#terry richmond x reader#terry richmond smut#terry richmond x black!reader#terry richmond fic#terry richmond fanfiction#aaron pierre#aaron pierre x black reader#terry richmond#terry richmond x black fem reader#black!fem!reader#black fem reader#terry richmond x black! fem plus size reader#terry Richmond x plus size reader#terry richmond x fem reader
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meet me in the hallway
𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭: jeon wonwoo x f.reader x kim mingyu
They been best friends their whole life. They’ve shared everything but they have never shared a girl. What happens when no one can keep their emotions out of this?
𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: neighbor / friends with benefits au, non idol au
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 24.4k
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: angst, body image issues explicit language, drinking, smut warning below
an: I’ve decided to rewrite and rework an older story I have posted.
𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐬.
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: intercourse, multiple sex scenes, talks of sleeping with someone else, wonwoo is kinda rough once, sex while intoxicated (both parties are fully consenting, oral (f, receiving), shower sex, threesome, some fluffy smut as well, Mingyu accidentally listening to the mc and wonwoo have sex
ONE - THE BEGINNING
You had all lived in the same apartment building. Wonwoo and Mingyu were childhood friends who moved in together right after college.
You were a teacher who lived next door to them. You had never been the type of girl who dated around or anything like that. Monogamy was alway the way for you. You had only ever been in long term relationships.
Your last boyfriend was an asshole who would break up with you to sleep around. He gave you this long winded speech about how he was still young and really wanted to see other people. He did that for about two months before he came crawling back to you.
You had been single for the last two years, and it was probably the happiest you had been. It was nice to not have to worry about being in a relationship. You just got to do what made you happy.
You had lived next to the boys for the last year and a half and over that time you had grown to have a pretty good friendship with them. At least once a week, which normally was every Friday night. You would all hang out, drink lots of wine and play board games or something like that. According to Wonwoo you all hung out on Friday just so you could get wine drunk.
It was Thursday and Wonwoo and Mingyu had invited you over to eat Chinese take-out and watch a movie. You came over and you were all sitting on the living room couch with plates filled with Chinese food. Mingyu was flipping through Netflix trying to find something for them to watch. Wonwoo and you were too busy chatting about something random that happened at his work.
“So, what should we watch?” Mingyu asked.
“I’m cool with anything,” Wonwoo said, shrugging his shoulders.
“Let’s just watch that anime Wonwoo was talking about,” you said sitting in the middle of the two boys.
“Sounds good,” Mingyu said, clicking on an episode.
You sat on the couch joking around and eating Chinese food until about ten when you said it was time to head home. You had to get up at six to go to work. If you stay any later you’ll be too tired at work tomorrow.
“Hey (YN), just so you know I’m going out of town tomorrow,” Mingyu said standing with you at the door to his apartment.
“Does that mean we can’t have wine Friday?” You can’t help but sound disappointed. You always look forward to Fridays with the boys.
Wonwoo yelled and walked over, “hey, we’re still friends we can have wine Friday without Mingyu.”
Mingyu rolled his eyes and shook his head.
“Fine, have wine Friday without me,” Mingyu stepped forward and wrapped his arms around you to give you a hug goodbye. He always gives you the best hugs.
“Wonwoo, did you want to come over to my place tomorrow?” You asked.
“Yeah that sounds good,” he said before giving you a hug goodbye.
“Alright Mingyu, have fun on your trip, and I’ll see you tomorrow around five Wonwoo,” you smiled before walking out the door.
TWO: A WHOLE NEW MEANING TO WINE FRIDAYS
Mingyu let out a sigh as he turned to look at Wonwoo who was smiling, and Mingyu just shook his head. Wonwoo was a huge flirt and he knew while he was gone Wonwoo was probably going to hit on you the whole time he was gone. Wonwoo could tell by Mingyu’s face that something was going on. “Mingyu what’s up?” he asked.
“Nothing,” Mingyu lied.
Wonwoo had known him basically all his life. He knew he had something on his mind, “I don’t believe you.”
“Okay I have a little crush on her.” He sighs.
Wonwoo smiled, “I can’t say I blame you, she's really pretty.” He patted him on the shoulder.
“We’re all really close and I don’t want to ruin it, but she’s such a sweet and funny girl,” he let out a light sigh.
“Yeah she’s one hell of a girl,” Wonwoo smiled.
-
Wonwoo knocked on your apartment door with a bottle of wine in his hand. He couldn’t lie for some reason he felt slightly nervous about the fact you were going to be hanging out alone. Opening the door, you had a smile on your face, and your hair was pulled back showing off the pretty skin on your neck. You wore a sundress and a blazer. You didn’t have a chance to change after work. “You look pretty,” he said as he stepped inside and slipped off his shoes.
“Thank you, Wonwoo. So I was thinking we could order some pizza. Because nothing screams classy quite like pizza and wine,” you said with a breathy laugh.
You walked into the kitchen area and handed Wonwoo the wine opener and reached into the cupboard and pulled out two large wine glasses. Sitting the glasses down in front of Wonwoo, he poured you both large glasses of wine. Grabbing your phone off the counter you ordered some pizza. Wonwoo sat at the kitchen table working on drinking his glass of wine. He couldn’t help but love how easy everything seemed between you. Walking back into the kitchen you went and removed your blazer and were now only wearing your pretty floral sundress. You sat down a game of scrabble you had under the coffee table, that you had literally only bought for wine Fridays.
“So, we’re playing scrabble tonight?” he asked arching his eyebrow so it showed over his circular glasses.
“Yes, we're playing scrabble. It’s the only two-person game I own,” you said sitting down.
You played scrabble and ate pizza together and finished off the bottle of wine Wonwoo had brought. You were now sitting still at the kitchen table but you had switched to taking shots of tequila and playing never have I ever. You told Wonwoo that you were boring so this wasn’t going to get you super drunk.
You tossed back your first shot and suddenly regretted even agreeing to play this stupid game. As the golden liquor slid down your throat. Tequila has never been your friend. Especially when it came to drinking games.
“Never have I ever gone streaking,” you said with a pointed look hoping that Wonwoo was going to have to drink. You’ve heard college stories from both Wonwoo and Mingyu and you knew the both got a little wild back in the day.
He gave her smirk and took a shot. Shaking his head, he said, “never have I ever had sex with a teacher.”
With a heavy sigh you grabbed the shot glass and quickly took the hard liquor. “First of all, I need to explain, he wasn’t my teacher. It was the stupid hot history teacher at the school I work with, we dated for a little while.”
“Damn that’s scandalous,” he smirked, causing your cheeks to burn.
“Never have I ever had sex in public,” you stare at a little shocked he took a drink.
“Never have I ever had sex in my room-mate’s room,” he said, hoping in college you had sex in your roommate's room.
You shook your head letting him know you were going to be drinking to that. With a raised eyebrow you said, “never have I ever had a body shot taken off me.”
He tossed back another shot and then looked at you extremely confused, “why has no man ever been smart enough to lick alcohol off you?”
You shrugged your shoulders, “probably has something to do with the fact I’m not a small girl.”
“Fuck that you’re beautiful and I say we change that right now,” he stood up quickly and became extremely aware of the fact that he was pretty drunk. He’s never gotten this drunk hanging out with you.
“Are you being serious?” You asked, confused.
He nodded his head and handed you a shot glass, “drink up doll, because I’m about to lick your skin.” Your cheeks burned even more as you clinked the shot glass with the one Wonwoo was holding. You stood by the table staring at each other for a moment before Wonwoo walked away and walked over to the fridge to pull out a lime. He quickly cut it up into a few pieces and grabbed the salt bottle off the counter. You stood in front of the kitchen table like actually in shock this was happening.
“Wonwoo, showing off my body makes me uncomfortable,” you said, reaching out and resting your hand on his chest and you swayed a little bit at the feeling of the mixture of wine and tequila flowing through your system.
Leaning forward he put his lips to your ear and whispered, “you’re beautiful and let me show you that.”
A shiver went down your spine as you nodded your head silently. She moved back and bumped the kitchen table. Wonwoo reached down and pushed your dress up over your hips. Helping you jump onto the kitchen table. You were suddenly extremely happy that you wore a cute pair of cheek underwear to work today. Laying back on the table, you sat back on your elbows as Wonwoo pushed your dress up further.
“May I,” he asked, holding the lime close to your breast.
Silently you nod as he dragged the lime up your chest towards your neck, wetting the skin. He then reached over and coated it lightly with salt. Holding the lime up to your lips you slowly opened your mouth holding the lime for him. He gave you one last smile before he poured the golden tequila into your belly button. You held her breath as his lips kissed your skin drinking the liquid. You felt yourself becoming turned on as he dragged his tongue across your chest removing the salt. Without a word his lips brushed your as he took the lime from your mouth. You stared at him completely breathlessly, you weren’t sure if anything in your life had ever aroused you more than what Wonwoo had just done to you. Pushing your thighs together you attempted to remove some of the tension.
He pulled the lime from his own and sat it down on the table as stared at you biting his bottom lip. You couldn’t even bring yourself to speak, because you were pretty sure the only thing that was going to come out of your mouth would be a moan.
“Did you like that YN?” he asked, smirking.
With wide eyes you silently nodded.
“Did you want to take one off me?” he asked, knowing it was only fair.
You nodded your head again and slowly sat up. Wonwoo helped you off the table and removed his shirt before jumping onto the kitchen table. Turning to the counter you grabbed a wedge of lime and dragged it across his extremely toned stomach. You poured salt across the trail of lime, and then brought the lime to Wonwoo’s lips and he bit down with his eyes locked on yours. Silently you poured the liquor into his belly button. You glanced at him for approval and he gave you a nod. Licking the liquid from his skin you took a breath before you dragged your tongue across his abs, before your lips moved up to his mouth to take the lime. Stepping away slowly you bit the lime for a moment before sitting it on the table. Wonwoo sat on the edge of the table staring at you with lust filled eyes. Suddenly it became very clear that he might have made a mistake when he said you should take body shots. Because his brain was fogged with lust as he stared at you.
“Was that fun?” he asked.
“Yeah,” you said softly, standing in front of him.
Without a word he jumped off the table and crashed his lips into yours. You were caught off guard for a moment but it didn’t take long before your lips moved against his. His hands gripped your soft hips pulling you closer to him. Your hands wrapped around his neck holding on to.
His lips moved from your mouth and started kissing his way down your neck. You couldn’t help but moan as he nipped at your neck. Pulling away he looked at you with lust blown eyes, your bottom lip was captured between your teeth. You stared at each other knowing that what was about to happen could change everything.
“What do you want to happen right now?” he asked with his hands still gripping your hips.
“I don’t ever do this, but I just want you,” you sighed, feeling drunk on lust. There has been a part of you that has had a lingering crush on Wonwoo since you met him. There was something about a kind of nerdy guy who wears glasses with a black cat personality.
“Okay baby girl, I will give you anything you want,” he whispered into your ears. Him calling you baby was enough to make you wet right there on the spot.
He turned you around so you were leaning against the table. Looking over your shoulder you watched as he dropped down to his knees and hooked his fingers into the elastic on your undies, slowly he slid them down your thighs. He quickly unbuckled his pants and reached into his pocket. He pulled out his wallet and grabbed the single condom. He sat it down on the kitchen table and then quickly undid his pants the rest of the way and pushed them down his thighs. As his pants hit the floor, he reached for the foil pack and tore it open with his teeth. He rolled the rubbed down his length. Your hands braced the table anticipating what was about to happen.
“Can we remove the dress?” he asked with his lips pressed to the back of your neck.
You nod your head quickly. If there wasn’t quite a bit of alcohol going through your system, you probably would have said no because of how self-conscious you are. He reached for the zipper that ran down your spine, he reached up and gently pushed the strapped of your dress down your shoulders and the fabric fell to the ground.
“What about this?” he asked with his fingers running under the straps of your bra. Silently you nodded your head once again. He unclasped your bra and you helped push it off. You stood there completely naked as he kissed down your spine. He reached around the front of you and dipped his fingers into your wet folds as he kissed the back of your neck. You couldn’t help the light moan that passed your lips as he gently stroked your sensitive nub. “Are you ready?” he asked with his lips brushing your ear.
Silently you nod anticipating what’s to come. He slowly pushed inside you. A low gasp passed her lips at the stretching feeling. You hadn’t had sex in about two years and you were going to have to get used to the feeling all over again. The slight pain you felt probably had to do with the fact that Wonwoo was quite a bit bigger than any other guys you had slept with. As he bottomed out his hands gripped your hips and you leaned forward on the table resting your elbows on the white wood and moaned.
“Are you good?” he rasped knowing you probably needed a minute. His hand gently ran up and down your sides giving you time to adjust.
“Yeah,” you said, speaking for the first time in a while. You weren’t sure if you could form proper words for a moment there.
He started his pace pretty slowly giving you time to get used to him, but as you arched your back and moaned he picked up his pace. Leaning back up you stood there with your hands pressed to the white hardwood table moaning as he thrust into you at a quick pace. One of his hands moved from your hips and reached around to massage one of your breasts. Gasping as he rolled your taut nipple between his fingers as he continued to thrust quickly.
“Wonwoo,” you moaned. “I’m close.”
He leaned forward and left a trail of wet kisses up your spine, and with his lips ghosting you skin whispered, “cum for me then baby.”
Your eyes about rolled in the back of your head as the coil in your stomach grew even more taunt. “Harder,” was about the only thing she could even think to moan.
“Come on baby,” he gripped both of your hips and continued to thrust into you even harder.
A loud gasp falls from your lips as your high crashes over you. Instantly falling to your elbows as Wonwoo continued to pound into you. He only got a few sloppy thrusted in before his own release. Slumping forward he rested his body against your back as he fought to catch his breath.
“Wonwoo,” you paused trying to catch her breath. “I need to sit my legs feel like they’re about to give out.”
He let out a soft laugh and pulled away from you and sat down in the chair by the table. You took a deep breath and sat in the chair that you had been originally sitting in. You were both completely naked as you just stared at each other trying to take in everything that had just happened.
“I’m gonna be sore tomorrow,” you said with a little laugh, knowing that you were most likely gonna be hungover and sore from the rough sex you just had.
“I’m rarely that rough with someone the first time,” he ran his fingers through his hair, surprised at how rough he had gotten. “Was I too rough?” he was suddenly concerned he hurt you.
“I’m fine,” you ran her fingers across your face and looked up at Wonwoo who was still staring at you with a concerned look. “Wonwoo, believe me you weren’t too rough. I’m not the type that normally likes rough sex, but damn that was pretty hot. I’m also not the type that casually sits around naked,” you said as you reached down for your sundress that was on the floor.
“I feel like I should let you know, I didn’t have sex with you just because I’m drunk. I actually think your beautiful,” he reached out and placed his hand on your bare thigh.
“Thank you, Wonwoo,” you smiled. You stood up and pulled your sundress without bothering to put your bra on. You walked over to the fridge still wobbly from the mixture of all the alcohol and the intense orgasm that Wonwoo had just given you. You pulled out a bottle of water and started chugging it and stared at Wonwoo who was still sitting at the kitchen table completely naked.
“I think this puts a whole knew meaning to wine Fridays,” he said with a little laugh.
You shook your head and suddenly felt awkward about the fact that the one-time Mingyu goes away, you and Wonwoo had sex on your kitchen table.
“Should we blame body shots for all that?”
He nodded his head, “yeah I mean body shots gave me a reason to basically get you naked.”
“I can already feel my hangover coming,” you sighed sitting back down at the kitchen table.
“Yeah let’s never mix tequila and wine again,” he leaned forward and gently pressed his lips to yours. It was a nice change after how rough he had just been.
“Did you want to cuddle on the couch and watch your anime you like?” You asked.
“Yeah maybe I should put boxers on,” he said reaching onto the floor to find his boxers.
You both got comfortable on the couch and curled up together. As you laid there for a while you finally said, “Mingyu missed a crazy wine Friday.”
Wonwoo couldn’t help the wave of guilt that washed over him. He had just slept with the girl that Mingyu had told him he like. He knew Mingyu said it was just a crush but suddenly he felt terrible, and knew that when Mingyu came home, he was going to have to tell his best friend about what had happened.
“Even though I can already feel the hangover coming on, I had fun Wonwoo,” you glanced up at him.
“Me too (Y/N),” even though he knew he might of fucked up with Mingyu he couldn’t lie he was glad he spent his Friday with you.
THREE: SOMETHING NEW
After the events that had unfolded with you and Wonwoo, you hadn’t seen each other. There really hadn’t been time for you to be able to talk about what had happened that Friday night. You had to go see your mother for a family birthday party and Wonwoo had some work stuff of his own to take care of.
Sunday rolled around and Wonwoo was eating lunch at the kitchen table when Mingyu walked in. The moment his warm eyes locked onto Mingyu he was suddenly filled with a sense of guilt for sleeping with the girl Mingyu had a crush on.
Mingyu sat his suitcase down and walked over and sat down across from Wonwoo. Mingyu could instantly tell something was wrong by the look on his face. “What’s up Wonwoo?” Mingyu was curious to know what was going on.
“I’m a terrible friend,” he sighed as he sat his fork down.
Mingyu tilted his head slightly to the side and looked at Wonwoo confused on what he could possibly be talking about. “What are you talking about?” he asked.
“I slept with the girl you have a crush on,” he sighed pushing his fingers through his dark locks.
Mingyu let out a light sigh and closed his eyes, processing what Wonwoo had just said to him, “you slept with (y/n).” It wasn’t a question by any means it was a statement. Mingyu wanted to be mad at him, because he had literally just told him about his crush on you. But he knew he didn’t have a right to be mad. He didn’t have claims on you or anything, he had no right to get between you and Wonwoo.
“Yeah, we got drunk, and it just kind of happened. We just had a fun time, and if you don’t want me to hook up with her again I won’t.”
Mingyu shook his head and let out a sigh, “Wonwoo I’m in no place to even try to be involved with anyone, so don’t let me get in the way.” Mingyu is so busy with his tech company he works for he barely has time to attempt and a relationship with how much he travels for work.
Wonwoo stared at Mingyu attempting to read his expression. He had known Mingyu basically all his life and normally he could tell what he was actually thinking by his expression. But at the moment Mingyu just kind of seemed indifferent or emotionless to the situation.
“Are you sure?”
Mingyu nodded his head, “yeah go for it, Wonwoo.”
The two of them talked about Mingyu’s trip for a little while catching up before Wonwoo knew he needed to have a serious talk with you. Walking next door he knocked on the door wondering if you were home. As he thought about it, he wondered if maybe he should have texted and asked if you were free. As he reached into his pocket for his phone to text you, he looked up at the sound of the door opening.
“Hey Wonwoo, what’s up?” You asked, leaning against the door frame.
He couldn’t help but let his warm eyes travel up and down your body. You were once again barefoot and wearing a cream-colored sundress that hit about an inch above your knees.
“Do you have time to talk?” he asked.
You nodded and stepped inside signaling for him to follow. You walked over and sat down on the couch that was in front of a large window. Wonwoo sat next to you and stared silently for a moment. You could tell he seems like he’s trying to figure out what to say.
“So…” he said awkwardly. “Friday was kind of wild…”
Your stomach dropped, wondering if Wonwoo may have regretted what had unfolded between you. You couldn’t help but wonder if it was suddenly a mistake. You were never someone who just casually had sex with someone. You had always waited to be in a relationship with someone before having sex with them.
“Wonwoo, we can forget it if you want,” you said awkwardly.
His eyes went wide and he shook his head, “um, (YN) I don’t want to forget that happened.”
You had a confused look on your face as you stared at him, “wait what did you want to talk about then?”
He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly wondering how he could possibly ask this next question without offending you. “I was wondering if you wanted to hook up more often?”
You couldn’t help but smile a little as you thought about the idea of you and Wonwoo having sex more often. “What exactly do you mean by that?”
“Like we could sleep together more often. I know we're both really busy, and you’ve mentioned that relationships aren’t really convenient for you right now, and I’m not exactly good at the whole relationship thing. But I personally think we have a good connection, and the sex was fun even with us both being drunk.”
You reached over and placed your hand on his thigh and asked, “so you want to be friends with benefits?”
He shrugged his shoulders, “I mean I guess yeah. Like we can hang out and have sex and stuff.” He couldn’t lie he had never once in his life had a friend with benefits relationship, but for some reason his mind was telling him that it was a good idea.
“I mean, I haven’t had sex in like two years before Friday. It would probably be nice to have a way to relieve sexual tension and relax. You’re also nice to look at,” you said, causing Wonwoo to let out a laugh.
He leaned back on the couch, getting more comfortable. “So do we have rules?”
You hadn’t even thought about the fact that you might need to lay down some rules. You stared at him for a moment before saying, “as long as we’re doing this, I would like it if you didn’t sleep with anyone just out of respect for me.”
He nodded his head. He hadn’t even thought about sleeping with anyone else while they were doing this. “Anything else?” he asked.
You nodded your head, “I’m on birth control but I still want to use a condom every time. The last thing we need is for you to knock me up.” He nodded his head knowing that was a smart decision. You didn’t need the possibility of you accidentally bringing a kid into the picture.
“Oh, and just so you know I’m clean, I got tested last month, and I haven’t slept with anyone since then,” he said.
“I’m clean too.”
You smiled and stuck your hand out and he reached forward and shook your hand. He tugged on your arm and pulled you forward so fell towards him. He placed his hand on each side of your face and brought his lips to yours slowly. The kiss was slow and passionate, you placed your hands on his chest firmly as your lips moved together. Pulling away from you slowly he tugged on your bottom lip and you let out a soft moan.
Your eyes were locked on each other for a long moment, before you stood up and took his hand on your and stood up. You led him down the short hallway to your room. The second you were in your room he stood behind you and dragged the zipper on the back of your dress slowly. The cream-colored dress was in a pool at your feet. Without a second a thought his fingers unclipped your bra and it fell to the floor landing in the cream-colored pool. Turning around you faced him bare chested and reached for the bottom of his shirt signaling for him to take his shirt off. He rid himself of his shirt. You reached for his belt making quick work of removing it. Neither of you could seem to get your clothes off fast enough. Your focus was then on unbuttoning his pants. He pushed his pants off as you slid your panties down your thighs. Walking over you lay on your queen-sized bed. He got rid of his boxers and socks, and followed you to the bed.
“I wanted to taste you, baby,” he said, breaking the silence that had formed between you.
Silently you spread your legs as you laid back. You watched with hungry eyes as he crawled onto the bed. He started placing kisses on your knees and then worked his way to the sensitive skin of your inner thigh. He placed a wet kiss on the top of your mound before dragging his tongue up your slit slowly. The moment his tongue lapped at your bundle of nerves you instantly let out a moan at the sensation. He rubbed index finger up and down your entrance, as he gently licked your sensitive clit. As his fingers slowly started pumping in and out of you, you tangled your fingers in his hair as you moaned. Each drag of his slender fingers earned a gasp.
It didn’t take much before you hit your high and your inner walls were clenching his fingers. Pulling away from you he licked his fingers and smirked as your chest was heaving as you came from your high.
“(YN), where do you keep your condoms?” he asked as he reached down and slowly pumped his hard length. The sight of you still coming down from the orgasm he gave you was turning him on even more.
“Top draw of the night stand,” you panted, closing your eyes.
He walked over and grabbed the box of condoms that you had in the top drawer and sat them on top of the night stand. Grabbing a foil packet he tore it open with his teeth, and slid the rubber down his length. Crawling back on to the bed he slowly spread your legs again. He hovered over you and pressed his lips to your for a heated kiss as he slowly slid into you. You gasped as he bottomed out and reached up to hold onto his back. Your back arched off the bed as he slowly thrust into you.
“I’m going to be gentler this time, and take care of you,” he said with his lips ghosting the skin of your neck. “I got you baby,” he rolled his hips into yours over and over again at a deliciously slow pace.
You lifted your hips to try and match his thrust as his lips moved across your skin, kissing wherever he possibly could. His lips moved down to your breast and he sucked gently on your taut nipples. With every thrust you couldn’t help but let out breathless gasp. Your fingers clawed at his back wanting him closer. He placed open mouth kisses wherever his lips could touch. The sounds you were making were driving him wild. The echoing sounds of your moans and whimpers, with the sounds of slapping skin was erotic.
“Wonwoo, I'm close,” you whined desperately.
“Baby come for me,” he moved his lips up to your ear and whispered. “Just let go baby,” his breath alone against your ear sent you over the edge. Your walls pulled on his length, and Wonwoo got a few more thrust in before he hit his high.
He came moaning your name and collapsed on top of you. He leaned forward and pressed his lips to yours for a soft kiss before he rolled off of you.
You laid there silently as you both rode out your highs. Wonwoo leaned over and pulled your soft body against his to cuddle.
“I could get used to this,” you sighed.
FOUR: DYING OF EMBARRASSMENT
It was the first Wine Friday since Wonwoo and you had started sleeping together and Mingyu couldn’t lie, he wasn’t exactly excited to be hanging out as a group. He kind of hated the fact that he knew you and Wonwoo were having sex. Mingyu had ordered Thai food from a place up the street and you were all sitting at the kitchen table discussing your work week. You and Wonwoo weren’t acting like you were a couple or anything so Mingyu was pretty happy about that. He also was happy about the fact you hadn’t had sex in Wonwoo’s room yet. Whenever you would hook up, Wonwoo would go over to your place.
The group was finishing up a bottle of wine when you started to play scrabble together. Mingyu was happy that everything between the group hadn’t seemed to change at all. Wonwoo and you never talked about what was going on between you, and Mingyu didn’t ask any questions.
As it was getting pretty late Mingyu told you guys he was going to head to bed because he was tired. He left you alone in the kitchen as you finished off what was left of the wine.
“Did you want to spend the night?” he asked knowing that you actually hadn’t had a sleep over yet, and you hadn’t had sex at his place.
You pushed a piece of your hair behind your ear and asked, “is that allowed?”
He shrugged his shoulders, “why wouldn’t it be?”
You raised her hands and shrugged, “I don’t know we haven’t had sex here before, and we haven’t had a sleepover.”
“Well Mingyu doesn’t care, and I want to cuddle,” he smiled standing up.
“I don’t have pajamas or anything,” you sighed.
“Okay let’s run next door and get your toothbrush and a change of clothes for tomorrow because you’re sleeping naked tonight,” he smirked.
You rolled your eyes and shook your head, “I need to bring something in case I have to get up.”
“Fine, whatever you say.”
You walked over to your place and you packed a little tote with something to wear tomorrow, an oversized shirt, and small sleep shorts, and your toothbrush. Once back at Wonwoo’s you brushed your teeth in the bathroom that was across the hall from Wonwoo’s room and was in your pajamas that Wonwoo told you he was going to take off you the second you were in his bedroom.
He kept his promise and the second you were in his room he quickly removed your clothes, and had you lying on your stomach on his bed. He laid naked on the bed next to you and placed kisses up and down your spine. He gripped your hips and laid on top of you slowly thrusting into you. You couldn’t help but moan as he gently bit the bare skin on your shoulder. Without a word he got off of you and rolled on to his back and told you to ride him. His hands gripped your soft hips as you slowly sank down on to his length. He sat up and massaged your breast as you continued to slide up and his length picked up the pace lightly. You couldn’t up but moan his name as he reached between you with one hand and rubbed your clit as you continued to ride him.
“Wonwoo,” you moaned.
Out in the hallway Mingyu had made the mistake to get up to use the restroom when it was obvious that his roommate was having sex with his crush. Mingyu let out a light sigh as he walked into the bathroom. His body seemed to be responding to the sounds of your moans. He walked over to the sink and splashed cold water on his face trying to calm down. He walked back into his bedroom trying to avoid hearing you have sex.
He laid in his bed for about twenty minutes before he got up to get something to drink. Walking back into the kitchen, he found you bent over wearing tiny shorts that didn’t even fully cover your ass. He couldn’t help but groan at the sight. You stood up quickly and awkwardly found Mingyu standing in the dimly lit kitchen wearing only his boxer-briefs. You couldn’t help but let your eyes wander across his extremely fit body.
“Hey (y/n),” he said, giving you an awkward wave.
“Hey Mingyu,” you awkwardly waved back. “Do you mind that I’m staying over?” You asked, wondering if he wanted you to go home.
“You can stay over,” he said as he watched you slowly tug on the bottom of your tiny sleep short. He couldn’t help it when his eyes wandered across your soft body. He knew he probably shouldn’t think about you naked, but he suddenly wanted to know how you looked underneath your shorts that were leaving little to the imagination.
You bit your bottom lip and tugged on the bottom of your sleep shorts again, your eyes wandered down to Mingyu's small boxer-brief and noticed that his bulge had grown quite a bit. Suddenly your cheeks burned when you realized that you were barely wearing any clothes in his kitchen and now he had an erection.
His eyes went wide when he looked down, and suddenly he wanted to die. He couldn’t help that not even ten minutes he had heard you and Wonwoo going at it and now you were standing in front of him wearing basically only underwear and a shirt. He couldn’t control that his brain was automatically turned on by all this.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” he said, sighed, moving his hands down to cover it.
“Hey it’s not a big deal,” that was a total lie because from the bulge in his boxer-briefs it looked like Mingyu was quite big.
You hated that suddenly you were thinking about seeing what was inside of his tight boxer-briefs. You ran your hands down your face not even sure what was going to happen now.
“I kind of want to die of embarrassment now,” he sighed.
“It’s fine, if you want, we can totally act like this never happened,” you gave him a soft smile knowing that he would probably prefer to act like this never happened.
“Yeah that would be great,” he sighed. “Well not that this isn’t a great time, but I came in here to get some water.
You gave him a smile and reached into the fridge to get a bottle of water. You held it out and Mingyu walked towards you. His hand touched yours and your eyes locked onto each other. There was suddenly even more tension between you. You both still held onto the water as Mingyu stepped closer. There was about a foot between you and your eyes hadn’t moved from each other’s. Both of them were silent, not even exactly sure what they should say. You looked up at him suddenly wanting to kiss him, and those thoughts made you feel like a terrible person. Not even fifteen minutes ago Wonwoo was literally inside you, and now you’re in the kitchen with Mingyu wanting to kiss him.
With his hand that wasn’t holding the water bottle he reached up and gently brushed some of your hair behind your ear. It was taking everything in him not to kiss you right then and there. He couldn’t do that though. He gave Wonwoo permission to be with you. He had no right to want to kiss you.
“Mingyu,” you whispered as you leaned forward slightly.
There wasn’t much space between you as he leaned forward and rested his forehead against yours. He took a deep breath wanting to say that you needed to stop, but at the moment he was at a loss for words.
“I should go back to bed,” you said softly as you pulled away from him.
He nodded his head and stepped back, “yeah let’s forget this ever happened.”
You nodded your head.
You both quickly left the kitchen and you slipped back into Wonwoo’s room. He was laying on his bed looking at his phone. He put his phone down and gave you her a smile and she suddenly felt guilty. Crawling back into bed, you laid on your side looking over at Wonwoo. You knew that you needed to tell him what just happened.
“I almost just kissed Mingyu,” you confessed.
He knit his eyebrows together and looked at you extremely confused, “what happened?” He couldn’t really be mad but he was just kind of confused about what had happened.
You rubbed your face feeling suddenly even more terrible, “I don’t even know, we just got close and almost kissed.”
He couldn’t help but feel guilty that he might have gotten in between you and Mingyu. Wonwoo noticed that there was some chemistry between Mingyu and you. He knew deep down inside he couldn’t be mad.
“Do you want to sleep with him?” he asked, knowing that you could slap him for asking her that.
You knit your eyebrows together and stared at him for a moment. You never even thought about the possibility of sleeping with Mingyu. Sure, you’re attracted to him, but you didn’t think about having sex with him. After seeing him only in his boxers though your mind did wonder what he would look like naked.
“I don’t know,” you said softly, feeling embarrassed.
“So, there’s tension between you two maybe you should have sex.” He couldn’t believe he was asking you to have sex with Mingyu. Part of him thought it might ease some of his guilty conscience about hooking up with you when Mingyu liked you first.
“Would you be okay with that?” You asked, reaching over and resting your hand on top of his.
He nodded his head knowing that he couldn’t be selfish, “yeah I can talk to Mingyu about it tomorrow.”
You couldn’t help the butterflies that seemed to form in your stomach. You couldn’t believe that Wonwoo had just offered for you to have sex with Mingyu, and that you actually agreed with it.
FIVE: YOU MAKE ME FEEL GOOD
You stood in the shower together with Wonwoo’s hands wondering your naked body as his lips moved down your neck with open mouth kisses. You couldn’t help but moan as he nipped at the sensitive skin.
You pump his length as he kisses his way across your skin.
“Fuck-“ he moans. His moans egg you on. You continue stroking him until he cums painting your stomach. “You’re so good at that,” he sighs.
“Thank you.”
“Let me make you feel good.” He presses his body to yours as he kisses you. You’re in the mix of a heated makeout session as he moved his fingers down to your core and his fingers started doing lazy figure eights as his lips were still on your wet skin. He removed his fingers from your core and gripped your hips walking you back towards the shower wall.
His strong hand reached down to lift your leg, and squealed a little as you felt your foot slip and seconds later, his hand lost its grip on your thigh and you slipped and landed on your ass. Before Wonwoo could lose his own footing, he managed to catch himself. He looked down at you with wide eyes worried you hurt yourself falling. “(YN) are you okay?” he asked.
You groaned lowly and nodded.
“I’m so sorry,” he reached down and helped you stand up.
Rubbing your ass, you looked over at him and shook your head, “what happened to, I promise I won’t let you fall?”
“I think there was soap on the floor,” he looked down trying to see why you slipped. “I’m so sorry (YN), I promised I wouldn’t let that happen.”
You let out a soft laugh knowing that Wonwoo didn’t mean to drop you, “I guess it’s my fault because I washed my hair first.”
“I can massage your butt and kiss it to make it feel better,” he smirked.
Her eyes narrowed on him, “you aren’t touching my ass anytime soon after this.”
“I’m really sorry baby,” he leaned forward and pressed his lips to your cheek.
“I think it’s safe to say we aren’t having sex in the shower.” He nodded his head knowing you were in no mood for shower sex after falling.
You got out of the shower and were still in the bathroom drying off when Wonwoo brought up the idea of him talking to Mingyu.
“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” You asked, unsure if Wonwoo was actually fully okay with this.
He nodded and said, “yeah I think this is a good idea.”
“Alright if you’re okay with it, I’m okay with it happening.”
SIX: PURE BLISS
Sitting on his bed Mingyu stared at Wonwoo dumbfounded. He wasn’t sure if he heard Wonwoo properly. There was no way that he had brought up the idea of him having sex with you. He was fully expecting for Wonwoo to be upset about him almost kissing you. He never expected for him to be completely fine with it and offer for him to sleep with you.
He scratched his neck and stared at him, not even sure what he should say to him. This had to be some sick joke, there was no way you were was okay with this.
“Wonwoo you’re joking right?”
He shook his head, “no, I think it’s a good idea.”
He leaned forward and rested his elbow on his knee and sighed.
“Mingyu, you liked her before I started hooking up with her. She’s not my girlfriend, and she is obviously attracted to you.”
Wonwoo walked over and sat down on the bed next to him. He looked over at Mingyu and rested his hand on his shoulder, “she’s fine with this by the way. She’s not my girlfriend, and I kind of got in between what could have been between you guys.”
Mingyu’s eyebrows knit together, he couldn’t lie he had thought about what it would be like to have sex with you, but the idea of sleeping with you seemed so strange to him. Sure, he and Wonwoo had shared a lot of things over their friendship, but they had never shared a girl.
“Wonwoo you hang out with her all the time, and you guys are having sex all the time. Why isn’t she your girlfriend?” he asked him the question that Wonwoo had been asking himself quite a bit over this last week.
“We both know I make a terrible boyfriend, and I’m not great with commitment.”
Wonwoo knew that he wasn't good at being in a relationship. He figured that out back in college when he dated Yeri. She was an amazing girl who was sweet and beautiful, but for some reason commitment freaked Wonwoo out to no end. He broke up with her out of nowhere claiming he needed to spread his wings
“Wonwoo don’t you think this is a really bad idea?”
Wonwoo shook his head.
“Maybe we should all talk about this.” Mingyu said, trying to think logically about the whole situation.
“We can all talk about it. She’s home right now, we can walk over there right now.”
Mingyu nodded and stood up. He wasn’t going to be fully on board with this idea until he had a chance to see what you had to say about this situation. The whole time Mingyu had known you he didn’t know if he had heard her even bring up sex before. Every time Wonwoo would crack a joke about sex you would just get shy and stay silent.
They walked out of their apartment and headed next door to your apartment. Wonwoo knocked on the door and Mingyu stood back awkwardly. He couldn’t believe they were actually going to have this conversation. You answered the door and gave both the boys a big smile and led them into your kitchen, where you were making yourself a cup of coffee. Both the boys silently sat at the table and watched as you moved around the kitchen. You were once again wearing a sundress like you normally did during the warm weather. Wonwoo loved seeing you like this, he thought you looked so beautiful.
Sitting down at the table you looked at both the boys and smiled, “so what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?”
Wonwoo leaned back in the chair and smiled, “Mingyu and I talked about the possibility of him sleeping with you, and he’s unsure about it.”
You couldn’t help but wonder if you made a mistake letting Wonwoo know you were interested in sleeping with Mingyu. The fact that he was unsure about it, suddenly gave you the feeling that he plans on rejecting you.
Your face had fallen a little and Mingyu automatically noticed. “(YN), are sure you’re okay with this? I mean I think you’re beautiful, and everything,” he started to ramble on stumbling over his words. “Are you really sure you’re okay with this?” he needed to hear you say that you were one-hundred percent on board with this.
You nodded and couldn’t help but smile as Mingyu was nervously rambling, “I’m okay with this. I was never the type of girl who had sex with someone unless I was in a relationship, but with you guys things are different. I really trust both of you.”
Wonwoo reached over and patted Mingyu on the back, “see Mingyu, she’s good with it. (YN) you have to promise us, if at any point you want to stop any of this, you’ll tell us. You don’t have to worry about hurting our feelings.”
Mingyu nodded along with Wonwoo, “he’s right, anything that happens here, is completely up to you.”
You smiled feeling way better about the situation. “You guys need to promise me that if we do this, this isn’t going to ruin your friendship. I can’t be what comes between the two of you.” They both nodded in agreement. “Also, like jealousy can’t be a thing here,” you said.
“It won’t be an issue,” Wonwoo agreed.
“Also, we need to make sure we always use condoms because I’m for sure as hell not going to have a pregnancy scare and then have to worry about who the father is.” They both nodded knowing that could be really bad for all them. “So, when does this whole thing start?” You asked.
“Well why don’t you two spend some quality time together now?” Wonwoo asked.
Mingyu shrugged, still feeling pretty awkward about the whole situation. You looked over at Mingyu and gave him a smile, “right now works.”
Wonwoo stood up and walked over to where you were sitting. He leaned down and gave you a quick kiss, and made his way out of the apartment. He knew it was going to be awhile before you actually hooked up but he wanted to give you both some privacy.
You sat at the kitchen table for a few moments making small talk while you worked on drinking your coffee. As you drank the last sip you stood up and walked over to Mingyu and reached your hand out. He laced his fingers with yours and you led him down the hallway to your room. You were suddenly feeling extremely nervous about this whole situation. You told yourself that this experience was a chance to really work on feeling self confident and was a chance to explore more of your sexual side.
Walking into your room you shut the door behind Mingyu and stood there staring at him silently wondering how this was even going to start. Never in your life had you made plans to sleep with someone you weren't actually dating. Things with Wonwoo naturally happened. You didn’t make a plan to have sex before you did.
“Maybe we should kiss,” you said softly, trying to soften him up. He nodded his head. Stepping forward you placed your hand on his cheek and leaned forward gently pressing your lips to his. Your first kiss was sweet but passionate. You placed your hands on his chest as both his hands reached up to hold your face. Your lips danced as his tongue slid along your bottom lips asking for permission.
Your hands were slightly shaky from nerves as you reached up to start unbuttoning his white dress shirt. He could feel your hands shaking and he slowly removed his lips from yours and looked into your eyes. “We can stop this if you want?” He needed this all to be on your terms.
Shaking your head, you softly sighed, “I’m not exactly comfortable in my own skin, and I normally don’t like people seeing me naked.”
A look of confusion crossed his face as he stared at you, “what do you mean? Wonwoo has seen you naked.”
You stepped away from him and wrapped your arms across your soft stomach, “the first time we had sex, I was drunk and didn’t have time to think about what was happening. I didn’t really have a chance to feel self-conscious.”
Reaching out he rested his hand under your chin and tilted your head up so you were looking right into his warm eyes, “hey (YN), I think you’re beautiful, and the other night in the kitchen I practically saw you naked. Since that awkward encounter I haven’t been able to stop picturing you naked. So don’t doubt yourself, I already know I’m going to like what I see.”
His sweet words caused a huge smile to form on your face. “Thank you, Mingyu,” you reached out for the buttons on his dress shirt again.
His eyes stayed locked on yours as your fingers seemed to steady as you made work of unbuttoning his shirt. The moment his shirt was fully unbuttoned you reached up and pushed it down his toned shoulders. You reached for his belt, he wanted to stop you and ask if he could take off your dress first, but he knew he needed to do things at your pace. You tugged his belt off and unbuttoned his jeans. Reaching down and pushed off his jeans and stood in front of you in nothing but his boxer-briefs.
Your lust filled eyes traveled across his extremely toned body. You were still in awe that you were sleeping with Wonwoo who looked like he was made by the gods and wasn’t real, and now you were going to sleep with Mingyu who looks the same just in a taller stature.
“Are you liking what you see?” he awkwardly asked with a little laugh.
Biting your bottom lip, you fought back a small smile.
“Can we possibly take off your sundress?” he asked knowing you might say no.
You nodded and turned around and pulled up your hair to give him access to the zipper. He reached up and slowly slid the zipper down. He gently reached up and pushed the straps off your shoulders causing the dress to fall to the ground at your feet. He slowly ran his finger down from the top of your neck down your spine to the top of the clasp on your bra. He paused and whispered, “can I take this off?”
Silently you nodded.
He unclasped your bra and removed it. He stepped in front of you and let his eyes travel down your soft body as you stood in front of him feeling very exposed. He reached down and started placing gentle kisses across your chest. His lips placed kisses on your taunted nipples and you closed your eyes enjoying the feeling of his lips on your skin. He reached down and hooked his fingers into your panties and pulled them down your thighs. As your panties hit the floor you looked up at him with wide eyes.
Stepping away from you he pushed down his boxers and he freed his growing erections. You bit your bottom lip wondering how bold you should be. If this was Wonwoo your hands would be all over him right now, but you were still nervous about being with Mingyu. You fully trusted him, but you didn’t know his body like you did Wonwoo’s. In the time you were with Wonwoo you had learned all about the things that make him tick. You know all the right places to touch that turn him on, and he knows the way to make you putty in his hands.
Slowly you stepped towards him and started touching his growing length. He closed his eyes tightly enjoying the feeling of your soft hands touching him. Your soft hand moved up and down his hardening length. He’s definitely thicker than Wonwoo.
“Can I touch you (YN)?” he asked, dying to know what you felt like.
You nodded as you continued to stroke his heavy length. He reached forward and rubbed his fingers up and down your folds feeling how wet you already were. Your eyes stayed locked on each other as you touched each other. Mingyu rubbed your sensitive bundle of nerves attempting to make you even wetter than you already were.
A loud moan passed your lips as you closed your eyes feeling the coil start to tighten in your stomach. You stepped away from Mingyu and removed your hand from his hard length, earning a whimper. He stared at you with wide eyes wondering what was going on.
“I need you, all of you,” you walked over to your nightstand and grabbed a foil packet and handed it to Mingyu before crawling the bed.
He tore the foil packet open and slid it down his length and looked at you as you laid on the middle of the bed waiting for him. It had been a while since the last time he had sex, so he was kind of worried he wasn’t going to last long. You spread your legs and he sat back on his hunches between your legs. He stared at you in awe of how pretty you were. He couldn’t believe that Wonwoo had gotten to experience the sight of seeing you like this quite a bit over the last week.
“You’re so beautiful,” he said lowly.
“You sure know the right things to say to a girl,” you smiled.
He slowly lined himself up with your entrance and pushed his way in, you gasped as he bottomed out and stilled with his strong hands gripping your soft hips. You moaned as he reached down to where they were connected and started to toy with your sensitive bundle of nerves. You moaned loudly and gripped the sheets, he hadn’t even moved yet and you were close to the edge.
“Mingyu, please move,” you whined, wanting to feel him more.
He smiled and leaned forward so he was hovering over you. With his lips next to your ear he whispered, “put your leg up.”
Silently you did as he asked and he slowly started to thrust into you. You reached up and held onto his back wanting him to be as close to you as possible as he thrust into you over and over. His lips were on yours for a sloppy kiss as you both moaned.
He was glad you were at your place so you both could be as loud as you wanted to without the fear of Wonwoo hearing you. With each thrust the pull of your tight walls was intoxicating. He moved at a slow steady pace. Each intent thrust earning a moan.
His pace started to pick up as your moans grew more frequent. The push and pull of his length against your velvety walls was hitting just the right spot inside you. Mingyu was slightly thicker than Wonwoo, but that didn’t stop him. He knew exactly what he was doing. He made you a whimpering mess without even trying.
“I’m close, so close,” you moaned.
“You take me so well,” he said breathlessly with his lips ghosting yours.
“Mingyu- you feel so good. I need - more.”
With one quick thrust he earns a high pitched moan.
“Good girl,” he crashes his lips into yours for a heated kiss.
“Can I come?” You whimper desperately.
His soft eyes lock on yours as his hips slowly roll his hips into yours. “You never have to ask.”
“Okay,” you moaned.
As you let go and as your walls pulled on his length, he only got about two more thrust before he hit his own high. He was still in you for a moment and kissed you as the both were riding out your highs. He slowly pulled away from you and laid on his back next to you on the bed. Reaching up you ran your hands down your face as you were trying to stop panting.
“Wow,” was all you could think to say. You and Wonwoo over the last week had quite a bit of sex, and Wonwoo was beyond amazing in bed. He always went out of his way to make sure you orgasmed before him, but something with Mingyu was different and you liked that. You couldn’t even figure out what it was, but you knew this arrangement with Mingyu was an amazing idea.
“So, is that what you and Wonwoo have been doing for the last week?” he asked, resting his hand on his chest slowly calming down.
Silently you nodded.
“Damn, I have been missing out,” he leaned over and pressed a kiss to the top of your head.
As you laid there in silence for a few moments with both you coming down from your highs. He leaned over and pulled your soft body next to his so you were curled up next to him.
You knew that you needed to make more rules about this whole situation, but at the moment you just seemed to be caught up in everything. You also didn’t know if either of the boys had a clue about how any of this would work out. You weren't sure how long you were going to be able to keep your feelings out of this either. In the last week you and Wonwoo had grown even closer than they already were. And you knew that was going to happen with Mingyu. Part of you couldn’t help but slightly worried.
“You're amazing (YN),” Mingyu whispered, bringing you out of your thoughts.
He leaned down and pressed his lips to the top of your head. “I can’t believe I’m sleeping with both you and Wonwoo.”
“I can't believe we’re both sleeping with the same girl either, but (YN) you’re a special girl,” he said, causing you to smile.
SEVEN: WERE NOT TALKING ABOUT THIS
A few days have passed since you had slept with Mingyu. Work had kept you so busy you hadn’t been able to see either of the boys. You couldn’t say you were exactly surprised when someone knocked on the door and see Wonwoo standing on the other side smiling while he was cleaning his glasses. You step aside and he follows you towards your small kitchen area.
“What’s up Wonwoo?” You asked looking around in your kitchen for you wine opener.
“You look hot today?” His warm eyes traveled up and down your soft body. “What’s under that tight skirt?” he asked suggestively.
You put your hand on your hip and looked over at him shaking your head, “please tell me you didn’t come over to my place the moment I walked in the door from work, to have sex with me?” You had a really rough day at work and at the moment just wanted to drink a whole bottle of wine and relax. The thought of having sex did sound relaxing but at the moment you wanted more than sex. You needed someone to listen to you complain and vent a little. You needed a friend more than anything.
“I’m offended,” he put his hand on his chest dramatically. Rolling your eyes, you turned back to look for the wine opener. He couldn’t help but say, “your ass looks great in that skirt.”
Turning back, you looked at him and glared, “you aren’t allowed to touch my ass after letting me fall in the shower.”
“Hey, what happened to, it’s okay Wonwoo, it's not your fault. It was my shampoo on the ground?” he asked with a little laugh. You didn’t say anything, you just continued to glare at him. “I can kiss it all better, and massage it if you want,” he winked, stepping towards you. Silently you just continued to watch him, it was moments like this that reminded you that maybe Wonwoo was too charming for his own good. Reaching up he pushed your hair behind your ear that had fallen in your face. Your glare softened as he leaned forward and pressed his lips to your cheek for a soft kiss. “(YN), I’m very sorry about dropping you on your ass in the shower.”
You couldn’t help but smile as you looked at him, “you’re forgiven.”
“Thanks baby girl,” he leaned forwards smirking and pressed his lips to your for a heated kiss.
“Why did you come over?” You asked, pulling away from him.
He shrugged his shoulders as he ran his hand up and down your side, “Mingyu wants us all to hang together.”
Your cheeks flushed lightly at the mention of Mingyu’s name. You hadn’t had a chance to talk to him really after sleeping together. You wondered if he was still okay with this whole situation. So far you had only had sex once, and you wanted it to happen again, but you weren't sure how he felt about it.
“So, how was Gyu in bed?” he asked, curious to how things went down. He couldn’t lie he had thought about what it was like between you and Mingyu. After he left you alone his mind quickly wandered about what was happening between his friends.
“We’re not talking about this,” you stepped away from him.
“Why not?” he asked, walking towards you.
“Because I just don’t want to talk about it. Up until having sex with you I didn’t even like saying the word sex out loud, and I don’t want to compare the two of you with either of you.”
“You’re being just like Mingyu,” he said, annoyed.
You turned and looked at him and was once again glaring, “of course you asked Mingyu.”
“Hey I just asked him if it went okay, and all he said was yes and left the room.”
Rolling your eyes, you shook your head at Wonwoo. You didn’t want to discuss the differences between them. Both experiences were very different, but also really good in their own way.
“I don’t want to talk about what sex is like with Mingyu, with you,” you sighed, turning back to the wine bottle.
He stood behind you closely with his hips pressed up against your ass and ran his hands up and down your sides slowly. As you pour yourself a glass of wine you grind your hips back knowing that Wonwoo might have actually come over to talk. But his body wanted something else too. You were pretty sure your body was starting to want something else too.
Pulling away you turned around and leaned against the counter holding your wine glass. Wonwoo stood right in front of you staring at you intently. Silently he watched her as you drank your wine. You sat the glass on the counter and reached up and rested your hand on his beautiful cheek right below his glasses. He licked his lips intently as he stared at you with lust filled eyes.
You leaned up and pressed your lips to his neck as you started to kiss your way up to his jaw. Biting his lip, he held back a moan.
“Baby, I didn’t actually come over for sex,” he groaned trying his hardest to behave. It wasn’t a lie he actually came over to talk.
You pulled away and looked at him, “are you sure about that Wonwoo?”
Slowly he shook his head knowing that he would never pass up the opportunity to have sex with you. Reaching down you grabbed his hand and led him toward your bedroom. He didn’t say a single word as you led the way. The moment you were in your bedroom Wonwoo untucked your blouse and left you in your bra and tight skirt that hugged your ass perfectly. He dropped to his knees and stared at you enjoying the view of your soft body on display for him. Reaching behind you he dragged the zipper down on the tight skirt. Slowly he dragged the skirt down your thighs. His mouth watered at the sight of your red bra and matching cheeky lace panties.
“Please tell me you bought this just for me” he reached up and ran his hands down your thighs.
“I bought it recently. I wouldn’t say I bought it just for you,” you giggled lightly. You hadn’t had a man look at you with the same look of awe like Wonwoo was doing right in the moment. You couldn’t lie the way he was looking at you was turning you on quite a bit.
“Baby girl, say you bought for me,” he groaned before pressing his lips to your lace covered mound.
You moaned as he moved your panties to the side and started sliding his fingers up and down your entrance, “I bought it just for you.”
“All of this just for me,” he stared up at you with hooded eyes as slid a finger into your already wet core.
You held eye contact as he continued to pump his fingers into your core. Whiny moans we’re passing your lips letting him know you’re close.
“I want to be inside you, baby,” he groaned, removing his fingers from you. You gasp at him pulling out as you’re on the brink of falling apart.
He stood up quickly and started removing his clothes. You took this as your cue and removed your bra and panties and crawled onto the bed. Wonwoo quickly grabbed a condom and rolled it down his length.
Laying on your bed you spread your legs inviting him in. Crawling across the bed he settled between your legs and leaning forward his lips connected to yours for a searing kiss. His hips thrust into yours slowly as your lips continued to move together. Your hands gripped his back as their hips kept meeting with each thrust. His lips moved from your lips down the base of your neck leaving a trail of wet kisses. Gently he nipped at the skin where your neck met your shoulder.
Your hands moved from his tone back down to his butt, gripping his skin trying to keep him close to you. With each thrust the coil in your stomach tightens more and more.
“I like when you wear your glasses when we fuck,” you moaned.
“I need them to see you,” he laughs before thrusting harder.
You moaned his name and let him know you were growing close to the edge. With his brown eyes locked on you he told you to let go. Rolling your head back you moaned his name as you hit your high.
Gasping as you rode out your high Wonwoo thrust into her a few more times before hitting his own high. His lips connected to yours as you shared a sloppy kiss. Rolling off of your soft body he laid on his side staring at you as you stared at the ceiling completely blissed out.
Reaching over he laced his fingers with yours and gently squeezed your hand. Looking over at him you couldn’t help but smile at him.
“You’re so pretty,” you whispered, still attempting to catch your breath.
The smile that was plastered across his face grew even more, “I don’t think a girl has ever told me I was pretty before.”
“Well more people should tell you how pretty you are, Jeon Wonwoo,” you smiled.
“(Y/n) you’re so beautiful,” he squeezed your hand once again.
You laid in your bed for about a half hour when Wonwoo left to go back to his and Mingyu’s apartment so you could get ready without being distracted.
EIGHT - WHO ARE YOU SLEEPING WITH?
Sitting at the kitchen table Wonwoo was telling some random story about Mingyu getting wasted in college. Mingyu looked down at the table with blushing cheeks, you couldn’t help but let out a little laugh at Mingyu embarrassment. Reaching under the table you squeezed Mingyu’s thigh capturing his attention. Looking off to the side he saw you smirking at him.
You both looked over at Wonwoo who was still talking about pouring Mingyu into bed when he was black out drunk.
“I think we have all had those moments,” you said, making Mingyu feel better. “One time when I was black out drunk I smacked my ex boyfriend.”
“I bet he deserved it,” Mingyu said, speaking up.
“Oh yeah the guy was an asshole,” you let out a soft laugh.
“What is the game plan for tonight?” Wonwoo asked.
“We could always go down to the bar tonight. A couple of the teachers at my school are going to be the bar down on second street,” you said.
“I would be down with going to the bar,” Mingyu said, placing his hand on top of yours under the table.
Shrugging his shoulders, Wonwoo said, “I’m down.”
-
The three of you caught a cab and headed down to the bar on second street. You walked inside and found a couple of the teachers that you worked with at a table against the wall. You headed over to the table all her coworkers were at. Wonwoo and Mingyu walked over to the bar to get drinks. Wonwoo leaned against the bar and watched as you were laughing about something across the room.
“Gyu, I think we’re in trouble when it comes to (YN).”
Mingyu nodded knowing that his friend was right. He knew deep down inside this couldn’t just be a casual thing.
“I don’t think I have ever known a girl like her,” Mingyu said. You were something else, you’re pretty, funny, nice, and neither of the boys could seem to get over it.
They grabbed their drinks and walked over to where you were with all your coworkers. Mingyu handed you a cranberry and vodka and put his arm over your shoulder as you introduced the boys to your coworkers. The group were all talking and laughing. Mingyu stayed by your side for a while before Wonwoo and two of her male co workers Chan and Seungkwan dragged him off to play a game of pool.
It wasn’t long before Wonwoo dragged Mingyu away from you to join the game. You watched for a short period before leaving the boys to their game.
Walking over you sat down in the booth next to your coworker Honey who was one of your good friends you worked with. Honey sipped her drink and looked over at you wondering what was going on.
“So are you sleeping with Mingyu who can’t keep his hands off you or are you sleeping with Wonwoo who can’t seem to keep his eyes off you?”
You sipped your drink wondering how you could get out of answering this question. You could easily just say nothing is going on. The thing is, you and honey were pretty close and you didn’t want to lie to her.
“I’m sleeping with both of them,” you said softly, hoping nobody other than honey would hear you.
Honey’s eyes went wide and she smacked your thigh in shock, “no fucking way?”
“Yep,” you said before taking another sip of your drink.
“So do you guys like have threesomes all the time?” Honey asked dying to know the dirty details.
Shaking your head you couldn’t believe you were actually having this conversation, “no we don’t have threesomes, but I’m sleeping with both of them.”
“Damn girl that’s pretty hot.”
Looking over to the pool table you found Mingyu holding the pool stick and staring at you. You gave him a smirk before looking back at honey. “It’s something I never thought I would do.”
“So are you worried about falling in love with one of them?” Honey asked.
Slowly you nodded, “I’m terrified that’s going to happen, but for some reason I think this is a good idea.” Looking back across the room you found Wonwoo now staring at you. “Why don’t we go watch the boys play pool?”
Honey and you walked over to where the boys were playing pool. Wonwoo wrapped his arm over your shoulder and held you close to his body.
Biting your lips you looked up at him smiling, he leaned over and pressed his lips to your temple and whispered in your ear, “you look really good.”
Since this had started between you and Wonwoo never acted like a couple other than when you were alone. You couldn’t lie you were a fan of the affection he was giving you. Mingyu was the one who had no issue holding your hand or touching you while they were out.
He pulled away from you when it was his turn and you walked over to Mingyu who was a couple feet away. You elbowed him gently and he smiled at you.
As the night went on you all had a blast hanging out with your coworkers. Walking into your apartment building. The boys walked you to your door and they both kissed the top of your head and wished you goodnight before they headed to their apartment. They walked inside and went to the kitchen to get a glass of water.
“I’m shocked you didn’t go into her apartment with her,” Mingyu said before taking a drink of water.
“I slept with her today when I went and saw her, I assumed you were going to go home with her. I thought you two might have some stuff you want to talk about,” Wonwoo said.
Knitting his eyebrows together, Mingyu stared at his best friend, “Wonwoo, are you sure this is a good idea?”
Shrugging he said, “it might not be, but it might be worth the risk.”
Wonwoo smiled and patted his best friend on the shoulder, “I’m going to bed, why don’t you go see her?”
Mingyu stood in the kitchen for a moment wondering if he should just go to bed. Letting out a heavy sigh he walked out of his apartment and walked over next door. Hesitantly he knocked. He stood at the door with his hands shoved in his jeans pockets. The door opened and you stood in front of him with her hair pulled away from your face and wearing nothing more than an oversized shirt and a pair of panties. Capturing his lip between his teeth he stared at you for a long moment silently.
“Hey Mingyu,” your voice was soft.
You hadn’t really spent any one on one time since you had slept together. You were surprised when you opened the door and found Mingyu standing on the other side. When you heard the knock on the door you expected to find Wonwoo on the other side.
“Are you okay with this happening again?” Mingyu asked, stepping towards you.
Silently you nodded.
Without another word he leaned forward and pressed his lips to yours. His strong hand rested on your cheek as your lips moved together. His other hand rested on your soft hip and walked you backward slowly inside your apartment. Pulling away from you he reached down and laced his fingers with yours and led you towards the bedroom.
Standing in your room he pulled his shirt off. You stripped off your shirt and pulled off your panties. You stood naked in front of him watching as he worked on taking his jeans off.
Once you were both naked your lips connected again for a heated kiss. Mingyu only pulled away to grab a condom.
Laying on your back you spread your legs as he sat on his hunches. He pumped his length a few times before lining up with your entrance. His hands gripped your hips as he moved. His thrust were slow but deliberate. Your hands gripped the bed sheets as you moaned loudly. Leaning forward he palmed one of your breasts as his lips connected to you. Moaning into his mouth as his thrust grew sloppier.
There were many differences between Wonwoo and Mingyu. One of them being Mingyu effortlessly made you feel delicate. When Wonwoo was with you, he made you feel like he couldn’t get enough of you.
Mingyu’s soft lips moved against yours as his fingers glided across your delicate skin.
Slow thrust earned echoing moans. The tightening coil in your stomach had you desperate. “I’m close,” you moan, reaching between you. Desperately you started to touch your clit.
He pulled his lips away from you and stared into your eyes as the both you were panting as both your their highs were near.
It only took a few more thrust before you fell apart together. One hand gripped your blush colored sheets while the other tangled in his dark hair.
His forehead rests against yours slowly opening his eyes. Pulling away he couldn’t help but smile. Pulling away from you he quickly discarded his used condom.
As you both rode out your highs you laid curled up against him with your head rested on his chest as his strong hand stroked your side. Mingyu had a way of making you feel safe.
“Are you allowed to spend the night?” You didn’t want him to leave.
“I’m not sure exactly what the rules are here,” he leaned down and pressed his lips to the top of your head.
“Stay the night please, I want to cuddle,” you whispered looking up at him. You weren’t ready to say goodbye to him.
He nodded and smiled, “alright I’ll stay.”
NINE: THE SUNSETS IN YOUR EYES
-Four Months Later-
Mingyu was away for the weekend on a business trip and you had spent basically the whole day with Wonwoo. You went to your favorite diner that was down the street and got breakfast together and on the way back they picked up some coffee to take back to the apartment.
It was a calm summer afternoon as you were sitting in Wonwoo and Mingyu’s living room. Wonwoo was relaxing on the tan colored sofa that was sat across from the tv with his legs kicked up on the coffee table. You were laying down comfortably on the couch with your head resting on Wonwoo's lap. Your bright eyes were fixed on the tv that was playing the third episode in a row of How I Met Your Mother. Wonwoo was half paying attention to the TV while he was partially focused on twirling pieces of your hair around his fingers. You have been in this position since Wonwoo had turned on the first episode and you hadn’t really moved other than for you to take a quick trip to the bathroom.
“Do people actually like Ted Mosby?” Wonwoo asked, breaking the comfortable silence that had formed between you.
“I mean I personally don’t,” you say with a soft laugh. “I mean he’s kind of an asshole, and pretty selfish.”
“He’s really selfish,” he said.
“I mean lets be honest, why would you be with Ted when Marshall is there,” you said looking up at him.
“You’re right Marshall is pretty awesome,” he said before he leaned down and kissed your nose gently.
“Are you annoyed by me laying on you yet?” You asked rolling over so that you were laying on your back staring up at him.
Shaking his head he let out a soft chuckle, “no.”
“Mingyu is supposed to be home Thursday so we can finally have another wine Friday,” he said as twirled another piece of your hair around his finger again.
“Well you two might have to start wine Friday without me.” He knit his eyebrows confused by your comment. “It’s my sister’s birthday that day so I won’t be home until after nine,” you reached up and rested your hand on his cheek.
“You don’t talk about your family much,” he said, realizing that you were never the type of person to talk about yourself too often. “Can you tell me about them?” He asked.
“Well my parents got divorced when I was eleven and there’s not much to tell about my father. He made it clear when he left that he didn’t want much to do with my mom, my sister and I. My mom is a strong woman. She raised us as a single parent until I was about sixteen when she started dating my now step dad Jack. He’s a nice guy who always treated my sister and I really well. Chaewon is two years younger than me and Jack is really the only father figure she’s known.”
Reaching up he rested his hand on top of your, “is your sister anything like you?”
“My sister is way more confident than me, she’s also a spitfire according to my mother,” you said with a soft laugh. You tried to play it off as a joke, but you had some insecurities when it came to being compared to your little sister. You loved her sister dearly and would do anything for her, but you had grown up hearing you were cute, while everyone talked about how beautiful your sister was.
“(YN) what do you mean? You are confident as hell?” He asked.
You shook your head, “I’ve never been comfortable in my own skin, and that probably has to do with the fact that I have been compared to my sister almost all my life.”
“I would bet all the money in the world that your sister has nothing on you. You are one of the most beautiful people I have ever met inside and out, and I’m barely able to keep my hands off your beautiful body.”
Your cheeks burned and suddenly you felt like crying because of his kind words. You had never dated anyone who went out of their way to tell you how beautiful they thought you were. Other than Mingyu who would also reassure you that you’re beautiful.
“You haven’t met my sister,” you whispered.
“I don’t have to,” he leaned forward and pressed his lips to yours for a soft kiss.
It was at times like this you couldn’t understand how you got lucky enough to have both Mingyu and Wonwoo in her life. For some reason Wonwoo seemed to know just the right things to say to you, and how to push away all your insecurities. You rolled onto your side to look over at the TV that was playing another episode of How I Met Your Mother. Wonwoo rested his hand on your arm and gently started rubbing it as his eyes stayed trained on you. He wasn’t even paying a little bit of attention to what was on TV. Biting his bottom lip he couldn’t help the feeling in his chest as he watched you.
“Wonwoo thank you,” you whispered as your eyes brimmed with tears.
“For what?” He asked with his eyes still locked on the side of your head.
“For letting me know that I matter,” you whispered with a shaky voice.
“You’ve always mattered to me, and you’ll always matter to me no matter what.” He leaned forward and pressed his lips to the side of your head. This was the first time that he had seen you this vulnerable and he wanted you to realize how special you are to him.
You laid in the same spot for another episode, you tried to focus on the episode and shake away the feeling in your chest while Wonwoo couldn’t even tell you what was going on in the episode. His eyes barely left the girl who was still laying in his lap. Before you knew it both your stomachs were growling letting you know it was time to eat dinner.
Moving off of Wonwoo’s lap you sat next to him on the couch and looked over at him with a soft smile on your face, “I don’t know about you but I’m starving.”
Normally Wonwoo would have made a joke about being starving for you, but there was a shift between you after your conversation. “Are we thinking we should take out, or maybe we could go downtown and get dinner together?”
“Are you asking me on a date?” You joked.
He shrugged his shoulders, “would you actually go on a date with me?”
Your eyes were wide as you stared at him, “is that allowed?”
“Why not?”
A smile formed on your face, “I would like that.”
“Okay let’s go then,” he stood up and held his hand out.
Taking his hand you stood up, “should I change?”
Shaking his head he led her towards the door where their shoes were. You both put on your shoes and Wonwoo led you out of the apartment. You walked down the street as the sun was beginning to go down hand in hand. Wonwoo kept looking over at you and he couldn’t help but see how beautiful you looked during golden hour. You looked as if you were glowing, especially as you wore a smile on your face.
You walked about a mile before you stopped in front of a café that was across the street from a park that had a beautiful view of the sunset.
“How about we get some food to go and sit at the park?” He asked.
“That would be wonderful.”
You walked inside and ordered some sandwiches and salad and quickly headed across the street and found a park bench that was near the edge of a pond. You sat next to each other watching the sunset eating. Wonwoo couldn’t help but keep looking over at you as you seemed focused on the sunset.
“Nobody has ever taken me out on a sunset picnic before?”
“Something tells me you have been dating the wrong men,” he reached over and rested his hand on your thigh.
“Before I started this whole thing with you and Mingyu I didn’t exactly have men bang on my door to take me out let alone sleep with me.” You paused and looked over at Wonwoo, “I took a really big leap out of my comfort zone starting this whole thing with you guys. With me sex and feeling have always gone hand in hand, and honestly keeping my feelings out of this is hard.”
Wonwoo closed his eyes, shaking the feeling in his chest. He was afraid to speak, that if he opened his mouth he might say something that he probably shouldn’t say. “I know I was probably crazy to agree to start this whole thing with both you boys, but it’s done nothing but help my confidence.
Looking straight towards the sun that was setting he was fighting the urge to say something that he shouldn’t say to you, “I feel like I’m a different person when it comes to you.”
Glancing over at him you wondered exactly what he meant by that, “is that a good thing or bad thing?”
“It’s a good thing,” he smiled, staring at the sunset.
“Do you ever look back at things that have happened and wished you could change them?” You asked, still staring at him.
Looking at you he stared into your bright eyes, “all the goddamn time.” In that moment there were a lot of things he wished he could have done differently. He wished he would have acted on his attraction for you long ago. He wished that he could have kept his heart out of this, and he wished that he wouldn’t have let his best friend get involved in this. “What would you change?” He asked.
“I would have told myself long ago that I need to love myself, and probably would have kissed you long before our first solo wine night,” you said with a soft laugh.
You stayed at the park until the sun was fully set and walked back to the apartment building with Wonwoo’s arm thrown over your shoulder holding you close while your arm was wrapped around his waist. Everything between you felt so easy, and Wonwoo knew that was for a reason. As they got to your floor of both of your apartments you went to walk off to your apartment when Wonwoo reached down and grabbed your hand. “stay the night?”
A crooked smile formed on your face as you nodded. Wonwoo led you into his apartment and off towards his room. Once in his room you stood at the edge of the bed wondering if this was when he was going to work on seducing you. He never asked you to stay the night unless you planned on having sex. Wonwoo walked off to his dresser and pulled out your pajama shirt you had left in his room a few weeks ago. You reached out and grabbed it and watched as he removed his shirt and jeans. Once he was down to his boxers you waited for him to remove them but was surprised when he reached into his dresser and pulled out a pair of gray lounge pants and put them on. You stared at him, still completely dressed, almost confused.
He walked over and pressed his lips to your temple and said, “I need a cuddle buddy tonight.” He walked over and sat down on the bed.
You removed your sundress and bra and pulled on your sleep shirt Wonwoo had given you. In nothing but an oversized shirt and panties you crawled into bed next to Wonwoo. Laying on your side you looked over at him knowing that you felt something more for him then you should. You were in love with him and you were a fool for feeling that way.
Wonwoo laid down and reached over pulling you close to him. Your soft body curled up against him. With your head resting on his chest it didn’t take long before you were sound asleep. It took Wonwoo a little longer to fall asleep as he held you. He couldn’t help the sense of guilt he had as you laid in bed together.
TEN: I MISSED YOU
As the sun was rising Mingyu walked into the apartment. He peeked his head into Wonwoo’s rooming expecting to find the room empty, but was surprised when he found you lying in bed sound asleep fully dressed with Wonwoo. Quietly he closed the door and headed off to his room. As he laid in bed he couldn’t help but be a little jealous of his best friend.
After waking up to find that Mingyu was home from his trip you had breakfast with him and Wonwoo and headed home to get ready for the day. You barely made it into your living room when Mingyu knocked on your door.
Walking into your apartment he stood there for a moment before leaning forward and pressing his lips to yours for a needy kiss. The whole time Mingyu was away he thought of you often. Ever since you had first slept together you never seemed to leave his mind.
“Did you maybe want a cup of coffee?” You asked.
He nodded his head and followed you to the kitchen area. Mingyu sat at the kitchen table as you worked on making a pot of coffee. He loved watching you move around the kitchen. You were dressed in her usual sundress and barefoot. You were humming something as you moved around.
“How was your trip?” You asked as you brought two cups of coffee over to the table.
“It went great,” he smiled, taking the cup from your hand. “What did you and Wonwoo do while I was gone?”
You took a sip of your coffee and sat your cup down before saying, “we just hung out and watched How I Met Your Mother.”
You couldn’t help the smile that formed on your face as you thought about the day you had spent with Wonwoo.
“That sounds like a lot more fun, then sitting in a meeting like I was doing,” Mingyu said as he slowly brought his cup up towards his mouth.
“Well we missed you.”
Mingyu had a feeling in his gut that maybe you didn’t miss him as much as you thought you did. He knew that you cared about him, but he also knew that you cared about Wonwoo a lot too.
“I missed you too (YN).”
You sat there drinking your coffee talking more about Mingyu’s trip. You were really enjoying your time you were getting to spend with him. Walking your empty cups to the sink you turned and said, “I was just getting ready to take a bath.”
“Do you mind if I join?”
“Of course not.”
Taking his hand you led him off to your room. Standing by your dresser you slowly started to strip away your clothes. Standing there naked in front of him you gave him a small smile before heading off into the bathroom. Mingyu removed his own clothing and then followed you into the bathroom. He found you filling the tub up with warm water and pouring bath salts in vanilla scented soap.
Mingyu stepped forward and slowly got into the warm water. You stepped into the water and leaned back so your soft body was pressed against Mingyu’s toned body. Your head was resting against his shoulder with your eyes closed enjoying the feeling of his closeness. Mindlessly he drew circles on your thigh. You felt so peaceful leaning against him. Biting your bottom lip, you smiled as he softly said, “I missed you.”
“I missed you too.”
You had spent all of the day before with Wonwoo, and that day had left you feeling very confused. But you couldn’t lie, you missed Mingyu quite a bit while he was gone. Over the last few weeks you had to constantly remind yourself not to catch feelings for either of the men you were sleeping with. After the day you spent with Wonwoo yesterday you weren’t sure your heart could stay out of this.
They spent about ten minutes in that bath before Mingyu’s lips moved to the base of your neck distracting you from your thoughts as he started placing wet kisses across your skin. A moan passed your lips as his hands moved up and gently started to massage your breast. Leaning your head back you closed your eyes taking in the feeling of his hands on your skin. Slowly you rolled your hips back against Mingyu's growing length. Biting your bottom lip you held back a loud moan.
“I need you,” he whispered in your ear, sending a shiver down your spine.
Silently you stood up and got out of the bath. You reached for a towel and turned to watch Mingyu get out of the tub, you could tell by his growing erection that he wanted you. Standing in the bathroom you dried off with lust filled eyes staring at each other.
“You are so pretty,” he walked towards you and pushed a piece of your wet hair behind your ear.
Taking your hand he led her off to the bedroom. With his lips pressed to your he walked you backwards until the back of your legs hit the bed. Slowly he leaned you back and you laid on the bed staring at him with hungry eyes. Crawling onto the bed he pressed his lips to yours once again and your lips moved together. Your hands were wrapped around his neck. Holding him close to you as their lips danced. He left you with a feeling of butterflies as his lips dragged from your mouth down to your neck. Closing your eyes you bit your bottom lip attempting to not moan.
Pushing on his chest and he removed his lips from you and looked up at you with lust filled eyes. His lips were parted as he stared at you silently. You took a moment to just take in his closeness. Your hand moved from his chest up to his neck. The world seemed to stilled for a moment as you stared at each other. Your eyes were locked on each other for a long moment.
“You're so amazing,” his voice was low.
You paused for a moment before saying, “how do you always know the right thing to say?”
“I always just tell you what I honestly think,” he leaned forward and pressed his lips to your forehead. His lips stayed there for a long moment and you closed your eyes taking in his closeness.
Pulling away from you he rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling for a moment before he looked over at you who was staring at him. You moved and crawled over to him and sat on his thighs. Your finger drew soft circles on your chest. He couldn’t help but smile at you.
“Baby you’re so pretty.”
Leaning down you pressed wet kisses across his collar bones and moved down his chest. As your lips moved down stomach he reached to stop you before his lips could get anywhere near his length.
“Lay back down baby,” he said lowly.
Slowly you crawled off of him and laid back down on the bed. He sat up and reached into the nightstand to grab a foil packet before moving so he was sitting on his hunched between your legs. His hands moved to part your thighs even more. Leaning forward he pressed his lips to yours for a sear kissing. Pulling his lips away from your he gave you a lopsided grin as he tore the foil packet open. He rolled the rubber down his length. His hands gripped your soft sides as he slowly slid into you. A low gasp pasted your lips as he filled you fully.
He leaned forward so he was resting on his arms hovering over her. Your leg was swung over his waist holding him close to her as his hips did slow thrust. Your hands held his face as your eyes stayed locked onto each other’s. Your bodies moved together in perfect sync.
The coil in you stomach tightened as he leaned forward and rested his forehead against your. Low groans past his lips as his hips pick up pace slightly. Through parted lips soft moans escape. Little was said between you as their bodies moved together.
As your hips continued to meet with everything slow, Mingyu pushed you closer and closer to the edge. He dropped down to his elbows so he was closer to you. Leaning down he pressed his lips to yours for a sloppy kiss pushing you over the edge. A gasp passed your lips as you rolled your head back. Mingyu got a few thrust in before he hit his own high. His body was clasped on top of you, his head was resting on your breast. Your hands reached up and you massaged his scalp enjoying how close you were.
They laid like that for a few minutes before Mingyu rolled off of you and disposed of the condom. You laid on your bed, both of you staring at the ceiling quietly. The longer you laid there the heavier Mingyu’s chest seemed to feel. Things between the two of you felt different and Mingyu knew you needed to talk about it.
“(Y/N),” his voice was shaky and unsure.
“Yeah?” You looked over at him and gave him a soft smile.
“Do you love Wonwoo?” Mingyu needed to know. He had noticed how close you had grown and could tell by the way that Wonwoo looked at you and how he talked about you that Wonwoo felt more for you then he was willing to admit.
You took a deep breath trying to figure out what exactly you were feeling, “I think so.”
Your eyes suddenly started to brim with tears. Mingyu nodded his head knowing that all good things had to come to an end.
“He’s a really great guy,” Mingyu said.
You rolled onto your side so you were facing Mingyu who was still laying on his back staring up at the ceiling.
“I think I love you too,” your voice sounded desperate.
“I think I got involved in something I knew was going to hurt all three of us. I was selfish, and I should have just let you and Wonwoo keep this up. If I wouldn’t have never gotten involved you wouldn’t have to sound so guilty about being in love with Wonwoo.”
The room suddenly felt as if it was spinning and you felt sick to your stomach. Warm tears started to slide down your cheeks.
“Mingyu.”
“(YN), we knew when this started somehow someone was going to end up hurt. I think that Wonwoo and you could have something special,” he reached over and laced his fingers with your and gently squeezed your hand.
“Are you ending things with me?” You asked as tears slid down your cheek.
Slowly he nodded his head, “(Y/N) I think I love you too and honestly I can't keep my feelings out of this.”
You took a deep breath as tears continued to slide down you cheek, “We can work this out.”
“(YN) we can’t, if we don’t stop now someone is really going to get hurt.”
“Mingyu but this hurts,” you begged. You weren’t ready to say goodbye to the man that was laying in the bed next to you. Even with all of your confused feelings you knew that she cared deeply about Mingyu. Even though you were trying to deny it. You knew deep down inside you loved Mingyu.
“I know this hurts, it’s hurting me too. I just want you to be happy, and I want Wonwoo to be happy too,” he leaned forward and pressed his lips to your forehead.
“I don’t think anyone gets a happy ending here,” you said softly as he started crawling out of bed.
“(YN) this is for the better.”
He got dressed and walked back over to the bed where you were sitting wrapped up in the blankets watching him with tear filled eyes. You weren't ready for this to be over and neither was Mingyu, but he was trying to do the right thing.
Standing next to the bed the twisting guilt filled feeling is almost too much to handle. His sad eyes stared at you for a moment before he pressed his lips to the top of your head.
“No matter what I want you to know that I still think you’re the most amazing woman ever.” That was his goodbye, he was leaving the girl he fell for trying his hardest to be selfless.
His feet carried him as he left the apartment and headed back over to his and Wonwoo’s place. Mingyu walked straight over to Wonwoo’s room. He found his best friend sitting on his bed with his laptop. Wonwoo looked up at the sound of Mingyu lightly knocking on the wall.
“What’s up?” Wonwoo asked.
“I ended things with (Y/N).”
Wonwoo’s eyes went wide as he tried to process what Mingyu had just said to him.
“What?”
“It’s clear you’re in love with her, and to be honest I think I am too. I want you to have a real chance with her.”
Wonwoo knit his eyebrows together as he stared at him, “Mingyu I don’t love her.”
“We both know that’s not true,” Mingyu said leaning against the door frame.
Wonwoo stared at his friend, unsure of what he should even say to him. Over the last few weeks each time he saw you he seemed to grow even more confused on what exactly he was feeling. He had told himself over and over again that he wasn’t allowed to fall in love, but now that his best friend was standing in his room telling him how he felt he wasn’t sure if he could lie to himself any longer.
ELEVEN: ALL IS WELL THAT ENDS WELL
It had only been a day since Mingyu had ended things with you, and in that time Wonwoo had kept to himself. He was completely unsure of what he was feeling or even what he should do. He stood in the shower just blankly staring at the wall, as a million things went through his mind. He thought back to the times that he had showered with you. And how you would stand there talking while he was washing your hair. He thought of how your bright eyes would stare back at him. You always seemed to show exactly what you were thinking.
Jeon Wonwoo had never been in love, and he wasn’t sure if the stabbing feeling in his chest was the feeling of guilt of betraying his best friend or the fact that he was indeed in love with a girl next door. He felt so guilty for hurting Mingyu, he knew when he started this with you that Mingyu liked you.
The cool water continued to fall on him as his eyes looked down at his feet. Reaching forward he turned the shower off and wrapped a towel around his waist.
Sitting on the edge of his bed he placed his face in his hands and let out a heavy sigh. He felt sick to his stomach as he started getting dressed.
Once he was fully dressed he walked into the living room to find Mingyu sitting on the couch with a sad look on his face. Mingyu looked over at him with his sad eyes and attempted to give him a smile.
“Where are you going?” Mingyu asked.
“I need to talk to (Y/N),” just saying your name made him feel guilty.
“Wonwoo, she's a good girl and you could have something great.”
Mingyu was trying to encourage Wonwoo to continue his relationship, but he knew Wonwoo wouldn’t listen to him. He could tell by the look on his best friend's face that he was sad and riddled with guilt. Mingyu didn’t want Wonwoo to feel guilty. He didn’t feel like Wonwoo had done anything wrong. It wasn’t his fault that you had fallen for him, and that Mingyu had fallen for you.
Wonwoo nodded before heading out of the apartment. Walking next door he took a deep breath before he knocked on the door. As you opened the front door he could tell by your puffy eyes that you had been crying. You gave him a sad smile before stepping to the side.
You had a feeling that Wonwoo didn’t come over to make things better. Walking into your apartment he followed you into your kitchen. Silently you poured him a cup of coffee and sat down next to him.
For a solid two minutes neither of you said anything to each other, you just silently drank your coffee. The sound of you clearing your throat broke the screaming silence.
“I’m assuming Mingyu told you he ended things with me?” Your hand clutched your large coffee cup. Silently he nodded his head unsure of even what to say to you. “He asked me if I loved you,” you felt sick thinking about the night before.
“What did you say?” Wonwoo asked, finally speaking for the first time.
“I told him I think I do,” tears once again started to brim your eyes as you confessed your feelings.
He looked down at the table as if he was suddenly afraid to look at the girl in front of him. Placing his elbow on the table he rested his face in hand and took a deep breath. He was so unsure of everything he was feeling.
“I think it’s pretty obvious you don’t feel the same way,” tears started slowly sliding down your cheek. His silence was heartbreaking. You had managed to fall in love with two men, one who wasn’t going to ever love you back and one who loved you but didn’t want to be with you.
“Mingyu is my best friend, and the closest thing to a brother that I have, and I hurt him,” he sighed, feeling guilty that he hurt the most important person in his life. “I have gone my whole life from the moment I met him doing everything I can to be the best friend I can be, and I fucked up.”
You closed your eyes and winced knowing that you were the reason he fucked up.
“I’m sorry (YN),” his eyes finally looked up to see your teary eyes.
Tears slid down your cheeks, you opened your mouth to speak and suddenly nothing came out. You didn’t even know what you should say to Wonwoo.
“How much I want to keep things going between us, I can’t do that to Mingyu. He means too much to me to do anything that could hurt him more than I already did,” he reached up with a shaky hand and pushed away the tears that kept sliding down your cheek.
“Okay,” your voice was low and shaky.
Wonwoo pulled his hands away from you and stood up and stared at you for a long moment. Biting his bottom lip he held back telling you that he didn’t want to do this. Walking out of your apartment he couldn’t let himself look back to see you crying.
Shutting the door he took a deep breath and leaned against the door. He wanted desperately to run back inside and tell you he didn’t want to end things but he couldn’t do that.
Sitting there at your kitchen table you couldn’t hold back the sob that broke in your chest. You knew when Wonwoo came to your door that you had not only lost Mingyu, but you were going to lose Wonwoo too. Closing your eyes you tried to hold back the tears that just kept falling.
Walking off into you bed she crawled under the cover and just laid there crying until the evening. You hated feeling like this, but you couldn’t help it.
Without a second thought she walked over to your closet and pulled out her overnight bag and worked on packing enough clothes for a week. Zipping your bag up you headed out of your apartment with your purse on one shoulder and your duffle bag on the other. Entering the car garage you went to your car and tossed your bag in the backseat.
You drove the two hour drive up north to where your sister lived. You didn’t bother texting or calling her. You just knocked on your sister's door. It was eight at night and your sister Chaewon was very confused when she found her older sister standing on the other side of the door with puffy eyes.
“(YN)?”
“I got my heart broken,” you cried as she dropped your duffle bag on the floor.
Reaching forward your sister pulled you into her chest and rubbed you back as you continued to cry. Can’t remember the last time you cried this much.
“Who broke your heart?” Chaewon asked.
You hadn’t told your sister about what had been going on with Wonwoo and Mingyu. You hadn’t really told anyone what was going on with the boys. You followed Chaewon inside to the kitchen where your sister made you a cup of tea, and then you went on to tell her all about Mingyu and Wonwoo and what happened.
Chaewon couldn’t lie, everything you told her seemed crazy, but she was never going to judge you for sleeping with both men, or falling in love with both of them.
“Why didn’t you and Wonwoo keep things up?” Chaewon was confused on why things needed to end between you.
“Because he didn’t want to hurt Mingyu more than he did,” you sighed knowing that you had gotten between two best friends that were basically brothers.
“I was so stupid I needed to keep my heart out of this, and for some reason I couldn’t help but fall for both of them,” she cursed. “If I could of just kept this strictly about sex this wouldn’t of been a problem, but I couldn’t keep my stupid heart out of this.”
“Sweetie, anyone would have fallen in love with them.”
You let out a heavy, “the last week with Wonwoo things had just seemed different. We were spending more time together and it wasn’t all about us having sex. I literally stay over with him just to cuddle and sleep together. We didn’t even have sex.”
“It sounds like Wonwoo might have feelings for you too,” Chaewon said.
You shrugged, “I thought he might, but from what both Wonwoo and Mingyu had told me Wonwoo doesn’t do relationships. He doesn’t exactly believe in love, he is the kind of guy that just likes to have sex.”
You couldn’t help but feel even more stupid, you knew how Wonwoo was but it didn’t stop you from feeling getting involved.
“Why don’t you stay here for a while. You don’t have to worry about going back to school for another month. You can totally stay here the whole time if you want,” Chaewon said, knowing that you couldn’t just go back to seeing your neighbors every day.
“I can’t stay here for a whole month, but I can stay for a week. I packed enough to be gone for a week,” you sighed. You knew sooner than later you were going to have to see Mingyu and Wonwoo again, but you needed at least a week to try to move on.
“That works perfectly,” Chaewon smiled.
Chaewon helped you move your stuff into the guest room. You took a shower and then went into the kitchen with your sister to make some cookies together before you decided to eat those cookies with some popcorn while watching a movie together. You sat on the couch together watching St. Elmo’s Fire, both of their favorite movies from the eighties. This was some much needed time that you needed with your sister.
TWELVE: TIME TO HEAL
When morning came around you sat at the kitchen table with your sister as she was making you banana pancakes. You had a cup of coffee in your hand as you said, “what’s the plan for today?”
“Hyungwon wanted to come over tonight for dinner if you’re fine with that?”
Hyungwon was Chaewon's boyfriend that you had always loved. You thought Hyungwon was the best possible guy for your sister. Chaewon was a kind and big hearted person, and Hyungwon was the exact same way. He would do anything in the world to make Chaewon happy.
“Of course Hyun can come over, but tell him he has to bring me my favorite Apple pie from the diner by his house,” you let out a soft laugh.
“You know he’ll bring that in a heartbeat for you,” Chaewon said as she put a plate with a stack of banana pancakes down.
“Did you tell him why I’m here?” You were curious to know if Chaewon had told Hyungwon about your relationship with both Mingyu and Wonwoo.
Chaewon shook her head as she sat across from you, “I just told him you got your heartbroken by your neighbor, I didn’t give him any details.”
You couldn’t help but feel slightly relieved, you didn’t really want everyone knowing about your relationship with both boys.
You ate breakfast together and then sat in the living room together watching your favorite show to watch together. You had a bowl of popcorn sitting between you as Chaewon clicked play on the next episode. Chaewon was the perfect distraction to keep your mind off of Wonwoo and Mingyu.
When it got closer to dinner time, Hyungwon arrived with an apple pie from your favorite diner. You sat at the kitchen table eating a slice of pie as Chaewon and Hyungwon worked on cooking dinner. Hyungwon had asked you how you were doing but didn’t ask you anything about getting your heart broken.
You all ate dinner together and then decided to watch a movie together. Hyungwon and Chaewon curled up on the couch together and you sat on the other side of the couch wrapped in a blanket. They decided to watch Catch Me If You Can. As soon as the movie ended, you headed off to your room to give Chaewon and Hyungwon some alone time.
As you laid in bed you couldn’t help but miss the boys. You had rarely slept alone much since everything had started up with the boys. The spot on the bed next to you felt cold and empty. You fought back tears as you closed your eyes before falling asleep.
THIRTEEN: I’M REALLY SORRY
You had been gone for a week and Wonwoo was very aware of it. He tried to not think about you constantly but his mind wandered back to you constantly. Everything seemed to remind him of you. He also noticed that Mingyu seemed to be distracting himself with work. Mingyu was sitting at the kitchen table with his laptop working on something, and Wonwoo stood in front of the fridge blankly staring inside, not even sure what he was looking for.
Mingyu looked over at his best friend, noticing that he was staring at nothing. He let out a heavy sigh shaking his head.
Mingyu was also very aware of the fact that you hadn’t been home in a week. He was also aware of the fact that his best friend seemed completely out of it. Mingyu knew that even if Wonwoo didn’t want to admit it he was pretty heartbroken. When Mingyu ended things with you he didn’t expect for all three of you to end up heartbroken. He thought if he stepped away that maybe the two of you would get together and not have to worry about his feelings.
Wonwoo walked off to his room not bothering to get anything from the fridge. Mingyu wasn’t sure what to do but he couldn’t deal with Wonwoo moping around.
-
You had arrived back home and you couldn’t lie you weren’t ready to see the boys. Walking up to your front door you unlocked the door and looked over when you heard your name. You glanced over to see Mingyu leaving his apartment. You both stood still staring at each other for a long moment. Mingyu went to step forward to talk to you but he stopped because he wasn’t sure what exactly to say to you.
His sad eyes locked on your sad ones. He could tell that you were as heartbroken as Wonwoo. Your bright eyes lack the gleam they normally had. Biting his bottom lip, he thought of what he should even say to you.
He wished that he could tell you that Wonwoo was miserable without you. Hell he wished that he could tell you, he was miserable without you. He knew he lost that privilege when he left you. He wished that Wonwoo hadn’t left you too. He never intended for Wonwoo to end things with you. He knew in his heart you had fallen in love with Wonwoo and he couldn’t blame you. Mingyu also knew that you had extremely strong feelings for him even if you weren’t in love. He felt like he had been put in a rock in a hard place. He had managed to put himself in a love triangle without meaning to.
“(YN) where did you go?” He finally spoke up and walked towards you.
You stood still at your door not even sure what you should say to Mingyu. You hadn’t spoken to him since he broke your heart that night. Just seeing him brought back a lot of emotions.
“I went to see my sister,” your voice was soft.
Mingyu took another step towards you and stopped a couple feet away from you. He wished things between you could go back to normal but he knew he was the one who had ruined everything.
“(YN) I’m really sorry.”
“Mingyu it’s not your fault it’s mine,” you reached for the door and opened it.
“I never meant for things to be like this.”
You had planned to walk inside but you stopped and stared at Mingyu for a long moment.
“Mingyu, let's be honest, if you didn’t end things when you did, we were both going to get even more hurt then we are now. How much I wish it wasn’t it true I don’t think I could have ever kept my heart out of this,” you let out a sigh as your eyes brimmed with tears. “Mingyu you mean a lot to me and I think you will always have a piece of my heart.” He walked towards you and stopped right in front of you.
Reaching forward he rested his hand on your cheek. He stepped closer so he was a couple inches away from you. He wished that he could tell you he wanted to take it all back but he couldn’t.
“(YN) you’ll always have a piece of mine too. I know we’re both hurt, but I need to have you in my life. Even if we’re just friends. I also need you to not give up on Wonwoo. He’s confused and he’s trying to be a good friend. I need you both to know there are no hard feelings on my part. I want you both to be happy.”
A soft smile spread across his face. You looked up at him and gave him a sad smile.
“Why can’t I be happy with you?”
“Because I know you can make Wonwoo happy,” he sighs.
“I don’t think he feels the same way for me that I feel for him, and one day I’ll be okay with that.”
“(YN)-” he wished he could convince Wonwoo to get his head out of his ass but he didn’t know if he could.
“It’s okay Mingyu,” you leaned forward and pressed your lips to his for a soft kiss.
“We were great while it lasted,” you stepped away from his touch.
“(YN) I’m here if you ever need anything and I would really love for us to be friends again.”
“Mingyu, I want more than friendship. I'm still trying to work out how to tell myself we can’t be together.”
You walked inside and Mingyu was left standing outside your apartment, wishing he could fix things between you.
Mingyu stood outside your apartment feeling more heartbroken than before. He sighed knowing that he needed to convince Wonwoo to fix things between you.
He walked back into his apartment and poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down at the kitchen table waiting for Wonwoo to get home from work. He needed to convince him to get his head out of his ass and fix things with you immediately. In all the years he had been friends with Wonwoo he hadn’t ever seen him so broken up over ending things with a girl.
When Wonwoo finally got home from work he stepped into the kitchen and found his best friend sitting at the kitchen table waiting for him.
“What’s up Mingyu,” he said as he walked over to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water.
“Wonwoo, we need to talk,” Mingyu said, speaking up.
Wonwoo knit his eyebrows together and gave him a confused look before sitting down across from Mingyu. He opened the bottle and took a drink of the water.
“You need to talk to (YN),” Mingyu said, jumping to the point of not bothering to dance around things.
Wonwoo closed his eyes taking a deep breath before he looked down at the table with a guilty expression. He slowly shook his head, “I can’t”
“Wonwoo, I don’t think you realize that you’re in love with her. In all the years I have known you I haven’t ever seen you broken up over someone,” Mingyu stated, attempting to get Wonwoo to realize how he felt.
“Mingyu I don’t love her, love isn’t real.”
As long as they had known each other Wonwoo had always told Mingyu he didn’t believe in love. Even after his high girlfriend cheated on him, he told Mingyu he wasn’t heartbroken because according to him love wasn’t real.
“You might not think love is real, but what you feel for her is love. You aren’t the only one completely torn up over this. I talked to (YN) today and she’s just as messed up as you. Hell, I'm just as much of a mess as you are.”
Wonwoo stood up and groaned as he pushed his fingers through his hair, “Mingyu it’s pretty clear you’re in love with her, so why don’t you get together with her? Like make her your girlfriend and have something with her that is something more then sex.”
Mingyu shook his head and stood up, “Wonwoo I talked to her and it’s clear she loves you. I can’t just date her. I already made the mistake of letting her go.”
Wonwoo paced in front of Mingyu for a moment silently. It was almost as if he was at a complete loss of what to even say.
“Fix it then Mingyu!” He shouted at his best friend.
He slammed his hand on the table, “I can’t fix it, she was yours first. I don’t get to be happy here.”
“Mingyu, she was never mine. She doesn’t just love me. Why are you dismissing her feelings for you?” He pushed his fingers through his dark hair. He took off his glasses, rubbing his eyes for a moment.
“Because even though I love her, Wonwoo. I love you too. You’re the closest thing I have to a brother and you mean too much to me,” tears brim his eyes as he looks up at his best friend.
“How do we fix this?” Wonwoo sits down sighing. “Why do we both have to walk away?”
“Wonwoo, do you love her?”
“You think I love her?” He looked up at Mingyu.
“I think we both love her,” Mingyu sighs.
Slowly Wonwoo nodded his head, “I think I do love her, and I know that she loves both of us.” The world felt like it was spinning sideways to him. “Mingyu if I fix things with her. Could you fix things with her?”
“I don’t know if she would take me back,” Mingyu reaches up, pushing away his tears. “I hope you realize just because we tell her we love her doesn’t mean she’ll just want something casual again. She deserves more, she deserves a relationship.”
“Could we make that work with both of us?” Wonwoo had never thought of the possibility of them both fully getting to be with her.
“I think we both need to talk to her, it’s up to her if wants one of us at all or both of us.”
FOURTEEN: I WANT TO FIX THIS
With the bottle of wine in hand Wonwoo reached forward with a shaky hand and knocked on the door. Seconds seemed to be creeping by as he waited for you to answer the door. Mingyu rested his hand on his shoulder attempting to calm his best friend's nerves.
As the door slowly opened he took a deep breath waiting to face you. You stood in front of him with sad eyes.
“Hi,” your voice was soft and unsure.
Wonwoo didn’t know what exactly to say to you. He had tried to prepare what he wanted to tell you but all of it seemed to leave his mind the second his eyes locked with yours.
“So Mingyu says I’m in love with you. I haven’t ever been in love and to be quite honest I don’t know if love is exactly real. I know I feel things that I haven’t felt before for you. I hadn’t seen you in a week and honestly this week has been hell. I haven’t been able to think straight knowing that I lost you. I never meant to hurt you by ending things,” he rambled on, not even sure if he was even making any sense at all.
You look next to Wonwoo and sees Mingyu standing there with his hands shoved into his pockets.
“Do you think you love me?” You look up at Wonwoo's tall figure.
Wonwoo slowly nodded his head, “I feel things for you that I have never felt for another person.”
“What about you Mingyu?” You asked, speaking to the other man standing in the hallway.
“I already knew I love you,” he gives you a gentle smile.
“What made you decide to come over here?” You asked, looking up at Wonwoo.
“Mingyu told me I needed to make sure I didn’t lose you,” he sighed. “Mingyu and I don’t want to lose you.”
“Did you want to come inside?” You asked, stepping aside. The whole apartment building didn’t need to know what was going on between you.
He nodded and walked past you. Mingyu stops in front of you before walking in. “I’m sorry,” he whispers before pressing his lips to your cheek. Your eyes lock as he pulls away and you can love behind his eyes.
You led them over to the living room coach. You sat down on one end of the couch and they sat on the other end staring at you.
Wonwoo still had a million things he wanted to say to you, but he wasn’t even sure how to say them. He had never really put himself out on the line like this.
“(YN) I can’t really picture my life where you aren’t with me. This last week has been hell not being able to be with you.” Wonwoo is trying his hardest to convey how he’s feeling.
“I can't be with you if you’re going to break my heart again,” you couldn’t deal with having your heartbroken again by the man sitting across from you.
“I won't break your heart again,” he reached over and rested his hand on your thigh.
“What about you Mingyu?” You looked on the other side of Wonwoo to see Mingyu staring at you.
“I fucked up.”
“Are you still done with me,” you stood up moving so you stood in front of Mingyu.
Silently he swallows staring up at you. He stood up, taking one of your hands and resting the other on the side of your neck. Gently he dragged his thumb across your delicate skin.
“(YN) I love you,” he whispered, leaning forward resting his forehead against yours. “Please forgive me.”
“Kim Mingyu, I love you too,” leaning back you stare at him and you can’t help but smile. “Is it still over?” You don't think your heart could handle losing him again either.
“If you’ll take me back it’s not over. I won’t ever walk away again.”
He leaned forward pressing his lips to yours for a soft kiss. Both his hands hold your face as your lips move together for a heated kiss. Butterflies fluttered in your stomach, missing the feeling of his lips against your.
Pulling away from you his nose rests against yours. A soft laugh passes his lips. “All this is complicated and not traditional, but just know we both love you.”
Looking over on the couch you find Wonwoo still sitting on the couch. Mingyu steps aside and you move to sit down next to the tall boy with glasses. You rest your hand on his thigh and give him a smile.
“I just need you to know that I’m new to this whole being a boyfriend thing, and I’m going to mess up sometimes, but I’m begging you not to give up on me.” He reached down and took your hand in his. “I won’t give up on you, but I need you to always talk to me and be open and honest with me.”
“I can do that,” he leaned forward so his face was a few inches away from yours.
“I love Wonwoo,” you say softly, moving forward so your lips were brushing against his.
“I think I love you too,” he pressed his lips against yours for a heated kiss. Your lips danced for a moment before Wonwoo pulled away from you and rested his forehead against yours.
“Did you both want to stay the night?” You asked not wanting to spend another night without them.
He nodded and smiled, “yes I would love to stay.”
Looking over at Mingyu he gives a soft smile and nods.
Wonwoo pulled your body close to his and they sat on the couch with you curled up next to him. His hand gently rubbed your side as your head rested on his shoulder. He wasn’t sure at that moment how he had gone a week without you. You had somehow managed to break down his walls without even trying. He wasn’t sure if Mingyu didn’t make him fix things if he would have been to get you back. The thought of you slipping through his finger hurt.
You reached for Mingyu's hands, pulling him down onto the couch next to you. You held his hand tightly as you cuddled closer to Wonwoo.
“So you both love me?” You beamed.
Mingyu leaned over, pressing his lips to the side of your neck. With his lips ghosting your skin he whispered, “I love you more than anything.”
“I believe I do too,” Wonwoo presses his lips to the top of your head.
You all sat together on the couch for probably an hour before you looked at both the boys with bright eyes and said, “can you take me to bed.”
Silently Mingyu nodded and took your hand leading you off to the bedroom. Wonwoo wasn’t far behind, taking in the sight of you two in front of him.
You stood at the foot of the bed and Mingyu slowly stripped away your clothes. Standing in front of them both completely exposed just smiling. You had spent the last week thinking you had lost Wonwoo and Mingyu forever and now here they were together confessing how they really felt. Reaching forward you worked on removing his clothing.
Standing naked in front of each other his hungry hands roamed your soft body as your lips moved together. Wonwoo leaned against the wall watching as it all unfolded in front of him with lust filled eyes.
Mingyu pulled his lips away from yours and said, “I missed you so much”
“I missed you too,” you walked away from him and moved to the bed.
You laid naked on the bed staring at the man you loved with lust filled eyes. He stared at you for a long moment. Things between you felt suddenly even more different than they ever had before. This didn’t feel like just sex like it normally did. Slowly he crawled on the bed and hovered over you. Gently he connected his lips to yours for a heated kiss. He dragged his lips from yours down the base of your neck. He left a trail of wet kisses across delicate skin. His lips kissed across each breast earning a gentle moan.
Your eyes looked over to the wall where the other man you loved was standing. “Wonwoo I need you,” you said as you reached for him. Your words did nothing to deter Mingyu who continued to kiss his way across your skin.
Pushing himself off the wall, Wonwoo made quick work of removing his clothes. Stepping towards his best friend and his girlfriend who were sprawled out on the bed in front of him.
Dragging his lips away from your soft skin, Mingyu eyes stayed locked on your. He crawled off you sitting on his hunches next to you.
Reaching into her nightstand by the bed you grabbed a foil packet and handed it to Wonwoo. He tore the packet open with his teeth and slid the rubber down his length. Laying on your back you stared at him in complete bliss that she managed to find two men who truly loved you.
Crawling on the bed he sat opposite of Mingyu, whose lips have not left your neck. Wonwoo pumps his hardened length watching.
Wonwoo leaned forward and kissed your cheek for a moment before moving his lips up to her your. “On your side baby,” he whispered with his lips brushing against your ear.
Mingyu pulled his lips away from your delicate skin and looked at his best friend. He couldn’t help but be a little unsure of what his position was in this situation.
You moved so you’re laying on your side and looked over her shoulder watching as Wonwoo moved behind you. His hand rested on your soft stomach as he slowly slid into you. Gasping as he bottomed out. He was completely still as his lips rested on your shoulder.
Leaning back and connecting your lips with a passionate kiss. Slowly he rolled his hips into you and he felt like he was home. It was almost as if you were made for him. His strong hand moved from your stomach and lifted your leg up. Hooking your leg under his arm as he continued to move into you at a slow pace.
“Mingyu, we can share,” he groans, not wanting his best friend to feel left out.
Mingyu’s eyes grow wide as he stares at the couple in front of him.
“Gyu please touch me,” you moans running your fingers across his abs. His stomach tenses as your fingers graze his hardened length.
Mindlessly he moves so he’s laying in front of you. You’re face to face. Your bottom lip is captured between her teeth as Wonwoo thrust into your velvety walls over and over.
One of Mingyu’s hands takes your breast massaging it as he kisses your jaw. Your hand grazes his length earning a moan. Reaching between you to of you pump his erection, desperately wanting to be close to both boys.
Your lips crash together, muffling the sounds of each of your moans and cries of desperation.
The air felt thick as the coil in your stomach tightened. Your pace you were stroking Mingyu picked up as you were getting closer and closer to the edge. Pulling your lips away from Mingyu you moan his name, earning a cheeky grin from him. Your head rested on Wonwoo’s chest as his hips continued to roll into you over and over again.
“Baby,” Wonwoo groaned before connecting his lips to yours for a rough kiss.
Your lips danced for a moment before you pulled away and looked at Mingyu who looked like he was on the brink of falling apart in your hand.
“Mingyu, please touch me,” you begged.
You were so close to falling apart and it wasn’t going to take much for him to push you over the edge. You had never felt as greedy in your life as you did right now. You wanted anything and everything the boys would give you.
Mingyu reached over brushing your sensitive clit with his thumb earning a whiny moan. He made quick work of playing with your sensitive bundle of nerves. Touching you just the way he knew would have you falling apart with very little effort. You continued pumping Mingyu’s length until he crumbled, moaning your name, while he painted your stomach with white ropes.
“Let go,” Wonwoo groaned with his lips ghosting yours.
With another thrust he pushed you over the edge and finally reaching the high. You couldn’t help the moans that passed your lips as he slowly rolled his hips into you a few times. It didn’t take long before he reached his own high. He dropped your leg and was still holding you close to him.
Mingyu laid on his back, his chest rising and falling coming down from his high. He looked over at the girl he loved, completely blissed out.
“I love you baby,” Wonwoo finally admitted how he felt as he held you close to him.
Laying there holding you close he hesitates letting go. He removed himself from you slowly and rolled onto his back. Laying on your back you look over at Mingyu for a moment before you smile at Wonwoo. He made a quick word of disposing of the condom and ran off to the bathroom to get a rag to clean you up.
Crawling back into the bed he couldn’t help but smile at the sight of you and Mingyu completely blissed out.
“So you both love me?” You asked not being able to hold back a huge smile.
“I believe I do baby” Wonwoo reaches forward pulling your soft body close to his. “I love you.”
With your head resting on his chest you couldn’t help but feel like you had finally found happiness with Mingyu and Wonwoo. Mingyu moved over, curling his body up close to you. He placed a kiss gently on your shoulder.
“YN I love you so much,” Mingyu said.
Pulling away from Wonwoo, you laid on your side with your back once again to him. Wonwoo wasted no time spooning your soft body.
Mingyu leaned forward pressing his lips to your for a gentle kiss. Things suddenly felt so right between you all.
Things between you weren't traditional by any means. You weren’t exactly sure how things would work out, but they knew you would have to learn as you go.
#seventeen smut#seventeen x reader#seventeen fanfiction#seventeen writing#jeon wonwoo#jeon wonwoo smut#wonwoo smut#jeon wonwoo fanfiction#wonwoo x reader#jeon wonwoo x reader#wonwoo x reader x mingyu#kim Mingyu#kim Mingyu x reader#kim Mingyu smut#Mingyu smut#Mingyu x reader#Mingyu fanficion#mingyu imagines#my writing#meet me in the hallway#kpop smut
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Second Best- Jungkook (part 6)
Summary: Being friends with someone who has your heart it’s already hard, let alone when that special someone ends up falling in love with your best friend, the one you think would never make anything to hurt you . Will you be able to ignore it and move on? what will happen when everything gets too much for you to handle?
Genre: Friends to lovers; angst; body insecurities; bullying; friend betrayel;
Pairing: Jungkook x female!reader
Jungkook woke up around 9:30 am. The first thing he did was check his phone in case he had any notifications from Y/n, but had none. He was seriously getting worried about this lack of response. Had something happened with the person Y/n left with? If that was the case he would never be able to forgive himself. He knew he should have gone after her, he's so stupid.
He got up, took a quick shower, got dressed, grabbed his keys and left, he couldn’t keep up with this uneasy feeling. Putting his helmet on, he drove to the coffee shop Y/n worked. He knew her shifts very well, and that was the only place he could find her. When he got there, he parked his bike, took a deep breath and got in looking everywhere for her but still no Y/n in sight.
“Hey there moto boy. What can I get you?” Sana asked. Jungkook looked kinda confused. “I was actually looking for Y/n. Is she on her break?” Sana frowned and looked at him suspiciously.
“You’re kidding right?” Sana exclamed. “You are always together and talk to each otherall the time when you aren’t. You can’t tell me you didn’t know she took some days off”
The world fell at Jungkook's feet upon hearing that. Y/n took a few days off and didn't even answered to his texts or deign to call? what the fuck was going on. Jungkook nodded his head, said thank you and left, picking his phone up instantly to call Y/n. “The person you called is not available. Please try again later”
Fuck. Me
------------
Y/n fell in love with that place as soon as she saw it. Everywhere she looked she she felt immense peace and everything seemed so quiet and cozy, everything to make the weight on her shoulders disappear. Upon entering the chalet, they were immediately greeted by a gentleman at the entrance who directed them to the reception.
After checking in and receive the keys, they picked up their luggage and followed the gentlemanto the elevator, who was showing them the way to their "apartment”. Y/n couldn’t believe what her eyes were seeing. Walking in, she’s faced with a very nice living room, with wooden walls and gray furniture. It had shelves with books, among other really cute stuff decorating the place. All very neutral and very light, exactly what she needed. On the coffee table was champagne and a plate with strawberries and chocolate with a small note saying "we hope you enjoy your stay as much as we enjoy your presence. Thanks for choosing us. Have fun"
From the living room they went to the bedroom to organize their things. When they walked in Y/n was even more astonished. From their bed they had a view of the outside. She always loved snow and being there was filling her heart with so much happiness she wished she could live there forever.
“Where did you find this place and how can you afford it for both of us?!” Y/n exclaimed. Lisa looked at her with a funny look “My dad owns it. A benefit of traveling so much and not seeing his family for so long, not everything can be bad. I used to come here for Christmast and New year. It's crazy during those days and you know me, I love crazy and those were my favourite moments here”
Y/n laughed. Only Lisa could say something like that.
“So… You know how to ski right?” Lisa asked out of nowhere. “Oh hell no Lisa, no way, not right now, we just got here we should—” Y/n argued back but was soon interrupted by Lisa
“There's a snow suit in the closet on the right. We have a lot to discover we won't wait until tomorrow. You rest during the night. Come on princess, time is money” Y/n huffed while getting her suit to start putting it on. How could Lisa have so much energy was something she couldn't understand.
They both got dressed and head out of the chalet. Y/n was amazed by the view, everything was perfect. But it’s not an adventure if something doesn't go right for Y/n. Out of nowhere she lost sight of Lisa, making her panick. She had no idea where she was.
Y/n looked around trying to see her friend but couldn’t identify anyone who would look like her. She started walking around worried about straying too far from where Lisa last saw her. Y/n was so distracted that she didn't even notice anyone coming close to her, ending up colliding with that person, causing her to lose balance and fall. The other person quickly knelt down, stretching out his hand to help her until she heard “Y/n?”
She looked up, took the stranger's hand and straightened her hair a little, trying to understand where she recognized that voice from, until the stranger took the protective mask off his eyes and saw him.
“Taehyung?”
Tags: @esposadomd @joonlover1207 @eegyo @furrywonderlandwolf @minghaosimp @differentrunawayperson @nikkinikj @jksusawife @11thenightwemet11 @jk97bam @11thenightwemet11 @cryingoverpixelsetc @bhonbhon @lostinneocity @almostpurplelady @meowforluv
#jungkook#angst#bts#jungkook imagines#imagines#jungkook angst#jungkook x reader#bts imagines#jungkook x you#fluff#jungkook imagine#kpop angst#bts x reader
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Do you write angst? Could you write something? You decide 😊
The One Who Never Was
Noah Sebastian x female reader
Warnings: Noah being a complete and utter fuck boy, talks of sex but nothing detailed, breakups, playing with someone’s feelings, gaslighting, love bombing, mental and emotional abuse, depression, co-dependency, unhealthy relationships, fwb, situationship, no happy ending in this story, drinking, self destructive behaviour, let me know if I’ve missed something!
Noah is not a nice person in this fic, if that is going to bother you then please don’t read. I did also picture long haired Noah when I was writing this.
I hope you all enjoy (if that’s the right word for a story like this ahaha) and I’m hoping to get back into my writing this week as I’m not back at work until Saturday (if I’m well enough) and this is the first time in about 6 weeks that I’ve been able to rest and do nothing so I’ll try and be productive with it
Tags: @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @Ima1986 (never lets me tag you properly for some reason?)
“Hey fancy meeting up today? Feels like it’s been ages”
You nervously sat there waiting for Noah’s response, in your mind already knowing the answer.
You and Noah had been in this ‘situationship’ for a year now, you’d started off as just friends and then one night, it had all changed.
You’d not long been out of a bad relationship when Noah first text you and asked if you wanted to hang out, you knew what he wanted and at first you thought it was a good idea, help you move on from the last dickhead that you’d been with.
“Best way to get over a man is to get under one”
So you went.
After that night, Noah then wanted to date you, he’d asked to take you out for a meal but you’d politely declined as you wanted to stay single longer so you could heal but you spoke about being friends with benefits with him instead, something he was completely up for. Looking back, you had no idea of everything that was about to happen.
•••••
You were sitting on Noah’s sofa, a film was on in the background and Noah was cooking you both dinner.
“What do you think of this?”
Noah had walked back into the living room with his hand under a spoon, you wrapped your lips around it to taste his home made sauce for the chicken he was cooking.
“Oh my god, that’s amazing! Since when did you cook?”
He gave you a big smile and a cheeky wink as he replied “I’ve always loved cooking, it’s even better when I have someone to cook for”
You’d both be curled up on the sofa, eating his amazing food before you’d spend the rest of the night together in his bed.
Noah had this power of making you blush with every word he said, he always made you feel like you were the only woman in the world.
“You’re like no woman I’ve ever been with”
He’d text you first always, told you how he felt about you and that you were the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen.
“Oh shut up!”
“I’m serious, I don’t know how I’ve got so lucky to be with someone as gorgeous as you”
The fact he’d accepted the friends with benefits over an actual date made you feel he would wait for you, that he completely understood that you needed time.
And let’s talk about the sex. The sex was like nothing you’d ever experienced before, he was such a pleasure dom, making sure you were completely satisfied again and again and again.
No man has ever made you feel the things that he did, he was willing to do everything with you.
“Whatever you want to to try, I’m down for it, even the weird shit”
“Weird shit? 😂”
“Any kinks you might not have tried because others think they are weird, I’ll do it all for you”
Noah always held you until you feel asleep, you fighting it, not wanting the night to end.
“Shhh, I’m here”
His fingers would gently caress your cheek while your eyes became heavy, feeling so warm and content in his arms
You’d wish you had longer, knowing that by morning, you’d both be going about your day and then never knowing when you’d see him again due to your schedules.
At some point, during the long into night deep chats, the dinner dates, the small details that Noah always remembered and done, you fell for him.
••••••
“Sorry I can’t today, busy in the studio”
That was it, it was so cold and blunt, there was no warmth in his messages anymore. Not that your heart allowed you to fully see it.
You felt the tears prick at the corner of your eyes as your heart became heavy and you felt the sinking feeling in your gut.
All of your friends have told you to leave him, that he’s making his feelings clear but every time you have tried to pull away, Noah always had the right words to say or a good excuse for his actions.
So you stayed.
And here you were, a shell of the person you used to be, when you first started this with Noah, you had such a spark in your eyes and you felt so happy.
Now, happiness with him was like a drug, he was like a drug. You knew he was bad for you, you knew he was killing you. But you couldn’t stop.
You stared at the screen, almost like your will alone could change the words. You scrolled up and saw it was much the same.
“Hey you about today?” “Sorry I’m working today”
“Fancy some dinner later?” “Maybe. I’ll text you in a bit”
Unless he messaged you…
“Hey baby, you free today? I miss you”
“Yeah I’m free, what do you fancy?”
“You 😏”
“Cheeky haha no seriously, what do you want to do?”
“Come to mine and hang out?”
You knew every time that it would lead to sex, you prayed it would, so you never said no to him.
You convinced yourself that he loved you as much as you loved him. Over the last year, you’d never felt anything like it before.
The only way you could describe it was that whenever you were with him, your soul felt at home. It didn’t matter what you were doing, you could be doing nothing and you were so contented to be around him.
You were always laughing together, you fitted together physically and just overall seemed like each other’s perfect partner.
You saw him for who he was, not this big rock star. You knew the rumours about him but you saw another side to him, a side he wouldn’t let many see. You knew he loved you deep down. Noah just struggled to show it because of his past.
You knew you shouldn’t make excuses for him, what’s the age old saying?
If a man truly wants to be with you then they won’t let a single thing come in between you.
And Noah gave you excuses most of the time, would take hours to reply and then blame it on work. You knew that wasn’t always true but you just accepted the behaviour because you’d fallen in love with him.
You’d fallen in love with the man who made you laugh until your belly hurt, who looked at you like you were the only other person in existence. Noah had recently said that he loved you back for the first time.
••••••
2 weeks ago, the last time you saw him in person.
You’d gone out for a few drinks with your friends and knew Noah was out already so you gave him the invite, not actually expecting him to show up in all honesty.
So when you arrived at the bar so see Noah stood there with your favourite drink next to his, your heart swelled within your chest.
The smile he gave you matched your own, his hug was so warm and for a moment, you felt like the whole world had stopped.
You sat down with your friends, both next to each other and clearly not paying attention to anything else around you other than each other.
In the words that your friend text you later….“A bomb could have gone off in that bar and neither of you two would have known, you couldn’t take your eyes off each other”
You both laughed and chatted all night, it only when you were outside getting some air that you decided to be honest.
“I love you Noah, I know you won’t say it back because you’re scared but I love you”
Noah stood and stared at you for a moment before he smiled and brushed your hair behind your ear.
“I love you too, always have”
The feeling in that moment was indescribable, the man you truly believed you were meant to be with had finally said those words back. He had finally admitted his true feelings.
The rest of the night you felt like you were walking on a cloud, you knew now that everything was going to be ok. All the heartache and loneliness before Noah had lead you up to this moment. To know it was all worth it.
You couldn’t stop smiling all night, even after he’d said that he needed to go, you gave him a big kiss and a hug and said that you couldn’t wait to see him again and finally start dating properly and have a relationship.
For Noah to ghost for you about a week, every message you sent was left unread, all the phone calls ignored.
Every time you felt your heart shatter, how could he do this? Surely not after he’d admitted he loved you? Who can do that?
Your friends were adamant that he was playing you and that you needed to block him.
You sat and cried your heart out, you drank your pain away and tried to find the answers at the bottom of a bottle, you’d do anything to numb the pain that you were feeling.
The feeling of having your whole future ripped away after just being given to you was soul destroying. You have hardly slept, hardly eaten. The weight was falling off your body as the days had turned into weeks.
It was only a few days ago that you’d finally had a response from him.
“Sorry been so busy with work, hope you’re ok”
But when you tried to arrange to see him, you got all the excuses once again. The never ending story of this game of cat and mouse.
You’d even confronted him about his behaviour.
“How could you tell me that you loved me to then ghost me? Who does that?”
“I wasn’t lying to you, I honestly have been busy, I can’t just drop everything for you”
You knew it was wrong, but you still wanted him, you craved him.
••••••
Sipping on the vodka in your glass was the only comfort for you at this moment. You’d text your best friend but of course just had the same old reply.
“Just block him, he’s made his feelings clear, he’s making a complete fool out of you”
You decided enough was enough, you’d walk over to his and see him in person, you couldn’t take this uncertainty anymore.
Walking to Noah’s was almost like a dream, but not the good kind, the feeling of dread was making you feel sick with every step, especially by the time you were outside his front door.
Taking a deep breath, you rung the doorbell, every nerve in your body on edge in preparation for the confrontation you knew was coming.
After a moment, you heard the sound of footsteps before the door swung open to reveal Noah’s tall frame.
“What are you doing here?”
You were sure you looked awful, dark circles around your puffy eyes, hair a mess.
“I needed to speak to you, can I please come in?”
Noah looked annoyed but stepped aside so you could enter.
“I haven’t got long, I’m going out soon”
Your chest became tighter at his words, the excuses already starting.
“Then just be honest with me Noah. What the fuck am I to you?”
He looked slightly shocked as he crossed his arms over his chest.
“You’re my friend y/n, I care a lot for you, you know that”
You couldn’t help but laugh bitterly.
“Do I? You told me you loved me and then ghosted me! No one is this fucking busy Noah! I’m tired of the games, I want you to be honest with me!”
The tears had already started, leaving a warm trail down your cheeks as you spoke.
Noah seemed to look anywhere but you, not able to meet your eyes as he answered.
“We have already been through this, I’ve just been busy”
“So you keep saying. May I remind you Noah that you originally chased me! You were the one who wanted to date, you were the one texting me and doing everything you could to make me fall for you! And now what? You just can’t be bothered anymore and don’t have the balls to tell me? You scared you’ll lose your booty call if you do?”
The last year was finally catching up with you, all the games and played feelings were coming to the surface, something you could clearly see was bothering Noah.
“Or are you too scared to actually commit because you’re frightened of getting hurt?”
“Are you for real? I’m not scared of anything!”
“Then why?!”
Noah throw his hands up in frustration and paced around.
“Because I don’t want to be with you! It’s that simple! You’re not the only girl I can have or have had! You’re a joke, you’re treating me like I’m your fucking boyfriend and I’m not, we were never dating!”
You stood in shock, how could he say that, although you never had an actual label, you’d been a couple in every way but the title and he knew that, he even wanted the two of you to be ‘exclusive to each other’.
But now it was starting to make sense, why he wouldn’t take it further.
“So you made me feel like I was the only woman for you, why? You told me that you loved me, said you wanted to be with me. Fucking hell, we even sat and told each other about all the dark shit in our pasts! You once said to me that I was the one person you never wanted to hurt!”
Noah’s face had become hard, a sign that he was shutting down from the conversation.
“And I didn’t. I’m not your boyfriend, I never have been and never will be. You’re making this all up in your head and you’re acting crazy. I’d like you to leave right now”
Your body was shaking and the tears wouldn’t stop falling as you stared at him. Your voice came out as barely a whisper.
“Where’s my Noah gone? My Noah would never have done any of this?”
Instead of answering, Noah simply opened the door, void of all emotion on his face. You stood in complete disbelief before you admitted defeat, your pride had already been shattered and you couldn’t take anymore.
You ran out of the door and kept running down his driveway. You collapsed at the corner of his road, the tears never stopping as your crying pulled your breath from your lungs.
You pulled out your phone and found Noah’s chat, the sinking feeling you had was confirmed when you’d tried to call but realised you’d been blocked.
You couldn’t wrap your head around it, your Noah, the man who made you feel so special and loved could never do this. Where was he?
•••••
The days turned into weeks, turned into months and the heartache never stopped.
Noah had ripped out your heart and broken you as a person. Your friend’s were always concerned for your mental state as you tried to navigate a life without him without any closure.
You didn’t see him again, unless it was online, but you knew he was just fine. Every time you saw his photo, he looked so happy and care free, he was living his dream, the band was starting to go viral and you knew this was only the beginning.
The rumours of who he was dating of course started to spread, each one like a knife to your heart.
You never got the closure your mind needed, you had to move on with no answers. Trying to piece yourself back together.
It was the hardest break up you’d ever gone through, and although others may say “well you weren’t actually together”
That was worse, he was the man you had completely fallen in love with, who never truly loved you back but made you feel like he did.
Noah was the one who never was.
#noah sebastian#bad omens#concreteangel92#bad omens band#bad omens cult#noah sebastian davis#noah sebastian x reader#concreteangelasks#noah sebastian fanfiction#noah sebastian imagine#noah sebastian fic#noah bad omens
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"I'm taking quirky title, I'm making an impression already. I like it." Quirky was one interesting adjective, but she didn't mind it at all. It was a funny one to her. "Sounds like I should be thanking your family for your party appearance then. I'm really glad you took a chance," she confessed with full sincerity. Was she being completely obvious in her interest? Yes, definitely. There was no hiding it, but Laurel was glad they met. Whether things went how she hoped or not. Friends would still be a very good outcome. She found herself smiling as she looked at him, taking in each feature that complimented those rosy cheeks. "No, she doesn't, but I wish! She's out in California, her and her boyfriend stayed out there for college. I worked really hard to convince them, but didn't happen this time. They might come visit soon though."
Laurel's smile widened when he talked about Juju, making a note to tell her later when she called her. It also just warmed her heart how he easily picked up on her connection to that wonderful girl she called her best friend. "She does, I miss her a ton too. Definitely not, bribery would work on me too," she joked, joining his laughter with her own. Still, his laughter caught her attention - the way his eyes crinkled, oh Laurel was swooning. It was the kind of laughter that made her want to keep saying or doing anything just to elicit that reaction again.
Was she serious, she couldn't really tell to be quite honest. It was the kind of thing said in a joking manner, but she wouldn't mind if it did. She'd leave it at that. "No hogging the blanket; I mean, if you keep me warm, there's no need to hog blankets," she said with a gleam of mischief in her eyes, her flirting getting ridiculously obvious. "But, okay I'm taking notes here. Hey, I don't judge awesome blankets." He really didn't mind, huh. She figured most people minded ditching classes, Laurel usually didn't until she realized that skipping a class meant falling behind. Now, she was strict about going, but today? An exception could be made. So, it was the complete truth when she answered. "Good, I don't mind at all either. I'm excited to learn more about you and," her words trailed off when he took her hand. It was a nice fit - their hands interlocked. Oh, Julia was right, she was falling...expeditiously. "Okay, but I'll get the next one. Yes? Just to keep it even." Without thinking, already eagerly requesting a next one. Seeing his attitude shit, Laurel made the silent decision to not bring Jenny up again, not wanting to sour the mood. "Well, I don't really like third wheels. Quick thinking on your part, wiggling me out of dinner with that class project you told her about."
With his sigh, she was quick to wonder if she had asked the wrong thing or if he was one of the guys who was annoyed by the astrology questions. Though, when he began talking, she felt terrible for even bringing it up. "Oh, I see. I'm sorry, I didn't think...well I didn't think at all when asking. A holiday birthday, so you're kicking off the year with a birthday, wow. You're still close with your foster family, it sounds like." It seemed like a real family to her, the kind of closeness and bond that most families lacked. She was already shaking her head at herself for her blunder when his chuckle caught her off guard. Her eyes were drawn back up to him, a soft nod in response to his question. A slightly awkward laugh escaped her, "I mean, I wasn't thinking of that but compatible signs are interesting," she admitted. "It does depend on all that, but I will say - astrology is not make or break for me. How about you? Would you ghost me if we're like the worst astrological match in history?"
"I never thought I'd meet someone let alone someone so quirky as you." Eli laughed not meaning anything bad by that statement. "My family said that I should go out and meet people. They know I'm not really a people person but that night I took a chance." Long eyelashes splayed across a semi rosy cheeks. Juju he committed to memory as that being her best friend. "I'm assuming she doesn't come to UT Texas? Were is she?"
He found her fascinating and the way she'd speak about her best friend. There was love there just like when he spoke about Issac and his sisters. That was a bond that could never be explained to its full extent. "She sounds like she misses you and will not be above bribery." The thought eliciting a laugh from him that made his eyes crinkle.
Was she serious about sharing the bed, he searched her eyes and happened to get lost in those pretty hazel of hers. After a moment when she didn't rescind it he smiled and nodded. "Just don't hog the blanket. I get cold," he teased not at all being serious about it. If anything he was an actual furnace. "And don't laugh at my very awesome blankets." Ditching class was not something that he wasn't completely turned off to. He had done it multiple times but this was the first time he wasn't running off to see what Emma needed. "Oddly enough I don't mind. I'm looking forward to getting to know each other." A sincere smile spread across his features as he interlocked their hands. "No, let me get it. It's my treat. Tonight." The talk of Jenny made him take on an indifferent attitude. "I am glad she didn't stick to her plan to wedge herself into our plans. I might have probably not been the guy you wanted to meet."
Eli sighed and shrugged not looking at her. He probably should have lead with this before. "My birthday is the second thing I've got no clue on. When I said my little sister, I actually mean foster sister. I don't have a real family. I was adopted into my foster siblings' family in my tweens. I grew up in an orphanage in the outskirts of Chicago. One night I got dropped off into that orphanage and they felt bad that I was the only one who had no name or birthday so they named me and gave me a January first birthday. The day they took me in." Astrology made him glance over briefly and chuckled. "You mean if signs are compatible? It depends on your birthday and your alignment." His lips curled into a smile. "Astrology is interesting."
#the smile eye crinkle!!! she's basically staring at her future right there <3#new year bday 😭😭😭 is everything jk jk it's papa day#SHE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW HOW LOADED THE QUESTION WAS AND YET HE'S JUST TELLING HER#MY HEART
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CAN YOU PLEASE WRITE A BANNER SIBLINGS STORY (LOGAN AND ASHLYN) PLEAAAAASSEEE
Logan and Ashlyn - You’ve Always Got Us
A non-romantic oneshot
Logan was used to being home alone. There wasn’t a big deal about it. His grandparents own a business after all. Besides, back in the day, when they still had those jobs, he was home alone a lot more often than just every few days in a month.
And, in some ways, learning to take care of himself for so long gave him some seriously good benefits. Now he knows how to cook and clean and make sure that the house is secured.
There’s nothing to it. It’s just how things are. Does he wish he has someone to keep him company? Well, ya, a sibling or something of the sort is a nice idea, but he doesn’t want any other kids to get dragged into the Fields family drama.
But, today was definitely not too great. All the food that they have is expired, so he has nothing to eat. He would drive to the store, but he doesn’t have a license.
So, in short, he’s screwed. No lunch, no dinner, no breakfast… and that continues until how many more days his grandparents will be gone.
He already felt himself begin to panic. Ya, he could ask one of his friends to help. Tyler knows how to cook, Taylor is always ready to help, Aiden can’t stay out of other people’s business, Ben is a sweetheart, and Ashlyn feels responsible to take care of the others in the group. But Logan can’t bear to be a burden. He’s already been enough of an inconvenience for them.
He can go a few days without eating. Rationing. He did it a lot back in the day. It’s never fun, but he can do it.
He decides to go to the couch to watch some tv, to try and distract himself. He crosses his arms and hunches up his legs, turning his brain off for a while. Easier said than done.
He glances at his phone every now and then, tempted to text his friends, tell them about his situation. But he stopped himself. But then he immediately jumped to his phone when it buzzed.
It was a text from Ashlyn to the group.
>Ashlyn: Hey, guys. My parents said that since it’s Fall Break, y’all can come over for dinner.
>Aiden: Awww!!! Ashlyn, you’re inviting us over?!?!!?!
>Ashlyn: It wasn’t my idea.
>Taylor: I wish I could, but me and Tyler have to take our mom to the doctor today
>Ben: My sister is spending the night, I was hoping to hang out with her. I’m sorry :(
>Aiden: Ash. You know I would go if I could. But…
>Aiden: I ALSO WANTED TO HANG OUT WITH MY COUSIN 💔💔
>Ashlyn: Geez
>Ashlyn: What about you, Logan?
Logan was startled and hesitated. This was a perfect opening. But no one else was going. Would he be intruding?
>Logan: Well, I am free this evening, but I understand if you don’t want me over since no one else is 😊
>Ashlyn: I really don’t care. You can come over if you want.
He thinks about his response before slowly typing back a response.
>Logan: Ya, I can come over. But I’ll need a ride.
>Ashlyn: 👍
He fidgeted a bit, nervous. Was he being a bother? He should’ve just made an excuse. Oh, but the promise of dinner was enticing. He hated that he didn’t regret agreeing to go. He should. It’s just embarrassing. He’s being such a bother.
He gets up and puts his shoes on and waits by the front door for Ashlyn and her parents to get here to pick him up.
His phone buzzes and it was a message from Ashlyn saying she was here. He steps out and sees the Banner’s car on the driveway. He steps in and sits down.
“Hi, Mr. Banner.”
“Hey kid. Ashlyn, say hi to your friend.”
“Hi, Logan.”
Logan awkwardly laughs. “Hi, Ashlyn. Thank you for inviting me.”
“It’s no problem!” says Mr. Banner. “I’m just happy that Ashlyn actually invited her friends.”
“Dad.”
“Sorry, sorry.”
Logan laughs and awkwardly tugs his seatbelt. He shouldn't have agreed to come. This is so embarrassing and awkward. He can't think of any small talk.
"So, Logan," Mr. Banner says. "How's your grandparents?"
Logan felt a rush of relief. Thank the universe for Mr. Banner making small talk.
"They're doing fine. They're currently on a business trip."
"Oh? So you're home alone?"
"Yes sir."
"Well, that's perfect timing for you to join us for dinner!"
"Haha.. ya."
"We're making black-eyed pea soup! It's Mrs. Banner's specialty."
Logan nods. He's happy with that. That's definitely a comfort meal, and he needed comfort right now because he felt like his heart was going to burst out of his chest. Why. Is he. So. Damn. Anxious. ALL OF THE TIME!?
They pull into Ashlyn's house, the bus graveyard in the distance. It's always weird seeing it when they're not in the phantom world, despite the fact that they hang out there all the time.
They go inside and the house smells really good.
"Oh! You got him?" Mrs. Banner asks, walking out of the kitchen to greet them. "Heya, Logan. Thanks for joining us!"
"No problem, Mrs. Banner.."
"Why don't you 2 set the table?"
Ashlyn and him look at each other and she shrugs. "Ok."
They walk to the kitchen to get some silverware. "Your family is really nice."
Ashlyn raises an eyebrow. "Ya, well.. They like that I have friends now. So I think they're abusing it a little for get togethers like these."
"You consider us to be friends."
"Oh. Are we not?"
"No, no, no! That's not it! I just.. I thought maybe you just tolerated us.. me. Since we're all kind of.. forced to hang out... But.. you really consider us to be friends?"
Now it was Ashlyn's turn to be shy. "Um.. sure, I guess. Friends is a simpler term to describe what all of us are."
They pause. "Yknow.." Ashlyn says. "There's still some time until dinner is ready. Wanna go to my room to listen to music."
This catches Logan's attention. "Um.. sure."
They go up the stairs and to Ashlyn's room. "What kind of music do you listen to?" she asks.
"Oh.. I really like Beach Bunny.. You?"
"Ray LaMontagne," she responds. "I've never heard Beach Bunny."
He smiles a little. "Well, I've never heard Ray LaMontagne."
She pauses. "Song trade?"
He nods. "Ya, sure!"
They sit down on the floor and Ashlyn pulls out a Bluetooth speaker. Logan plays Nice Guys, and Ashlyn plays You Are The Best Thing.
“That’s exactly the kind of music that I imagine you would listen to,” Logan says with a soft chuckle.
“Oh?”
“Ya. He has a really soft voice, so not too overwhelming. I get it. Though the lyrics were surprisingly upbeat,” he jokes a little.
She smiles ever so slightly, but hides it by resting her chin on her knee. “Well, I wasn’t expecting yours.”
“Oh?”
“Ya. The song just.. I don’t know how to explain it. I always thought you’d be more of a David Bowie fan.”
Logan smiles brightly. “I love David Bowie!”
“So I was right.”
They let the music continue playing on and they both leaned back. “This is a lot less awkward than I was worried it would be,” Logan says.
“Tell me about it.”
“Nice to know I wasn’t the only one nervous..”
There was an air of understanding and solidarity between the two of them. It was nice, having someone who understands what it’s like, getting overwhelmed easily. He never thought it would be Ash, though. She’s always seemed… untouchable and far. Someone who’d never want anyone close, especially a whiny loser like himself.
“Kids! Dinner’s ready!”
The two head back downstairs and sit at the table. The soup smelled amazing and looked amazing. “Thank you so much,” he says.
“No problem, kiddo!” Mrs. Banner says, sitting at the table.
Ashlyn already started eating, but Logan waited until everyone was seated until he started eating. That’s what his grandparents taught him to do.
Once everyone got to the table, he waited until Ashlyn's parents started to eat, and then he dug in himself, napkin in his lap.
"So, Logan," Mr. Banner says. "How long until your grandparents get home?"
"Oh, I'm actually not sure. These business days can go on for a while.. Especially when the weather gets colder, since the flowers are all slowly going away."
He nods, but looks a bit concerned. "So they just left you with no idea how long? When you have no license..?"
"Oh, well, it's fine. I can take care of myself, yknow."
Mrs. Banner and Mr. Banner look at each other, a bit unsure, but don't push it. "Well, how about you spend the night?"
Both Logan and Ashlyn were startled by the offer.
"No, no, no, you really don't have to! I don't want to intrude-"
"Nonsense, we'd be happy to!" Mrs. Banner says. "Only if you want to, though. No pressure."
"I-I-I.." Ya, he's been at sleepovers, but with the rest of the group. What if Ashlyn finds it annoying that it's just him?
"It's fine," Ashlyn says to him. The two look at one another, as if they were both trying to read each other's minds.
"O...k..." he says slowly. "Thank you for.. having me..."
Mr. Banner nods. "I'll let you borrow some of my clothes, kiddo. I've got a lot of old ones I've been meaning to donate. But I'm happy to lend you some for tonight."
"Thank you.. thank you so much. This is really nice of you guys."
Mr. and Mrs. Banner clutch their hearts at Logan's sweetness. "No problem. Anything for Ashlyn's friends!"
"Let's go to my room," Ashlyn says. They begin to go back upstairs, Ashlyn already taking her earbuds out.
"Are you sure you'll be ok without those?"
"You're not like Tyler or Aiden. I'll be fine."
He smiles a little at that.
"I'll set up a cot for you." Right as she was about to go and get the stuff, he stops her.
"Thank you, Ash. Really."
"Hey, man.. it's.. fine. I can't really imagine being completely alone. My parents are.. yknow.."
"Ya.."
She nods and heads off. The Banner family is so nice. He's never felt so welcomed anywhere. Not even in his own home, where his grandparents are probably annoyed with him about something, even just a little. He doesn't doubt their love at all, it's just.. it doesn't feel like this.
A family where they all chat and tease and have fun.
She returns with blankets and a blow up air mattress. She plugs it in and turns it on after putting her earbuds back in.
"Hey, Ash?"
"Hm?"
"After this.. do you want to do another song trade..?"
She smiles. "Only if you watch ballet YouTube videos with me."
This surprises Logan. "Video trades, too? Well then. Only if I can show you mythology based videos."
She nods. "Deal."
He nods back. "Thanks, Ash."
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miss vegas. how do u survive in college. please give me some tips. i am barely hanging on by a thread and it's only my first year. how do u do it. also ilysm.
hi nonnie 🌞. omg ofc! i used to live on campus, i don’t anymore which is way easier for me— also, don’t stress. first year can always be a lot and extremely overwhelming but i got uuuuu !!!!!! love u too
it's a lot of things i wish i knew as my first year LOL. i guess one thing that is probably super basic, don’t procrastinate. just get your stuff done so you don’t have to worry about it later ☝️ it’s easier said than done, but trust you’ll feel a lot better once you finish your assignments / projects early n on time !!! also, staying up late while working on stuff — don’t do that. it’s not good for you, and i always did that eheh. waiting ‘till the last minute of 11:59 to finish essays nuh uh. do your stuff as soon as it get assigned, DONT PROCRASTINATE 🫵 also, go to all your orientations. do nawt skip them
sleeeeeep. you need lots of sleep, regardless of what year you’re in it’s very important. i wish i knew that as a freshman 😀😀😀. i would stay up all night doin work, especially on the weekends. certified loser nerd. also, set an alarm !!!! if you’re a heavy sleeper like me, set a fuck ton of them !!!! or uh… have someone wake you up. i used to oversleep a lot, a way to prevent this is to usually go to sleep earlier than you usually do ( from my experience )
if you’re on campus, have some sort of map / guide so you know where you’re going !!!!! on my first day i literally got lost right away and i barely knew much english so it was even more embarrassing LOL. beeeee prepared !!!! ☝️ do research on ur school, they should provide those things — also, try to get those things ahead of time before your courses start so you aren’t askin random ppl where one of your rooms are. of course, its okay to still get lost anyway. it happens. ask for help if needed but make sure you’re prepared !!!
you don’t necessarily need friends to “survive” in college. everyone’s experience is different, but i found my experience easier by just keepin my circle small 🫂. IM NOT SAYING TO BE A LONER, you can have / make friends throughout your years ofc !!! in college, you’ll meet the best and worst people of your life. your main priorities should be yourself and your studies — but you come first at the end of the day. friends will always come & go, but eventually you’ll stumble across some nice ppl who share the same interests as you !!!
there’s prob super more important details but for the last thing i’ll say this— don’t let your grades define you 💓. it sucks majorly to get bad marks on something, especially if you stayed up countless hours on it, givin it your all. i personally have / had a habit of doing that, but never let it define you. if you truly think you didn’t get the right grade for any number of reasons, you can always talk to your prof about it in private. but don’t stress ab it !!! always remember you matter first over some exam 🫵
#✰ミ݁ ׅ ࣪ asks.#🧁#everyone's college experience is different — but try to have fun !!!!#make the most of it. you aren't alone. ☝️#one step at a time xxx
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gonna do something somewhat out there and out of nowhere. i just finished kinktober on my like... main wg account so i've missed doing kpop wg so i'm coming back with... zb1 SDFJSDF gunwook been attacking me lately so he's going to be the one feeling it now.
All-in
This is a feederism fic and features weight gain and unintentional weight gain. Don't like, don't read.
There was a dreamy sort of sigh that left the table in the library and it took one paper flying to cause the source of it to make an annoyed expression. "Yah! Kim Gyuvin!" The warm tone of Gunwook sounded a little more frustrated than usual as his friend held his finger in front of his lips, to shush him.
"You can't be too loud in the library, Gunwook~" The teasing tone almost made him jump over the table to show him who could be louder of the two before he felt the pointed gazes of the students around them and buried his head in his textbook, muttering curses towards his friend who barely had enough mercy to add quietly, "Just because Matthew hyung is here doesn't mean you should neglect your work."
His long crush on the older friend of theirs was something that was practically known by everyone in their friend group. And something that he couldn't help but get embarrassed about everytime someone pointed it out. He wasn't that subtle about it... and it wasn't aided by the fact that Matthew tended to treat him nicer than his heart knew how to react with.
"Gyuvin, I swear if you don't stop talking about it when he's this close by, I-" The words that left Gunwook were growing more threatening by the moment before he heard a loud exclamation. "Oh, Gyuvinnie and Gunwookie!" It was always nice that Matthew didn't seem to care about the negative glances for the loud volume but he only belated realized, offering a small apology and a sweet smile that no one could stay mad at as he approached.
"O-oh, hyung! Good to see you." Gunwook was severely underprepared for the way that Matthew sat next to him and leaned on his shoulder while Gyuvin tried not to laugh.
"H-hi, hyung." Gyuvin imitated his stammer which got a death glare shot in his direction before Matthew spoke again, "I didn't know you guys were studying here... but I brought some snacks for Taerae since he said that he wanted some." Gunwook tried his best not to visibly deflate at the thought before the snacks were placed in front of him.
"Huh? What are you doing, hyung?" Matthew stuck his tongue out as he added, "No one said he needed to get them all. I bought a lot so you can just have the extra instead. I know how much you love to eat." There was a pat on his head from the older man and Gunwook did his best to not beam before opening the box. Gyuvin rolled his eyes from across the table, texting someone about what he was witnessing in front of him.
While he dug into the snacks and made conversation with Matthew there were some things that came to mind. Taerae was a little bit on the heavier side. Not fat but chunky was a good way to describe him. It only made his dimples and smiles cuter and nicer to hug, something that Matthew was incredibly fond of. He had believed that Matthew was someone who had a crush on Taerae for a very long time... so maybe that was what he was missing.
Gunwook was a good gym buddy for Matthew... but what if he wanted something that was a little bit softer. Was that the best way to capture his attention? With a renewed vigor, Gunwook ate the snacks that Matthew had brought even faster, surprising both of his company. "Hyung, do you have any more?"
Gyuvin wasn't unaware to the way that Matthew's face seemed to warm up as he stammered for a response for a moment before furiously texting Ricky. They had made a bet on when something would happen between them after all but he couldn't really afford it to happen now... he was going to lose the bet.
"All I have is the stuff for Taerae... how about..." Matthew bit his lip with a smile that he was failing to hide. "I bring these to him and we can head out for something to eat?" Gunwook's eyes brightened before Matthew nearly stumbled out to get the treats to Taerae. Gunwook began to pack his notes while Gyuvin looked at him, "Seriously?"
"You told me to stop staring... so I'm doing something about it." Considering how smart Gunwook is, it should have occurred to him that Matthew practically sprinted back to him so that they could head out to get food while Gyuvin was trying to ease up Ricky on the bet so he wouldn't owe him too much.
-
As he jumped in his dorm room, Gunwook felt his face burn, feeling the way that the flab jiggled, trying to squeeze every possible extra inch of himself into the pants that no longer fit into his frame. It was almost like a dam was broken that day.
He had stopped going to the gym as much with Matthew but he was seeing him just as much, if not more. They were always getting food since Matthew excused it as wanting to treat his dongsaeng. But, Gunwook didn't realize that not working out combined with Matthew's constant treats would have results this fast.
He'd already let out this pair of pants twice since upsizing and now, his belly was sticking out from his body, proud and bloated with fat. Or food considering that Matthew treated him most meals in a day. It was always nice when he insisted on Gunwook trying something new and he loved it.
It's not like the weight was solely tied to his prominent belly but it settled in his thighs and glutes which wasn't really aiding the pants situation. They clung tightly to the plump thighs as well as didn't even make halfway up his ass as he tried hopping into them again, hearing a faint tear of fabric and how much the fat on his body jiggled at the motion.
While looking at himself in the mirror, Gunwook's hand absentmindedly rubbed his belly as he felt his face flush. Matthew had been a lot more touchy with him recently. Either holding his love handles or even sneaking squeezes on his belly which always made him think he was on the right track to getting his attention. After all, him blowing up was for him as well.
But, there was an enjoyment he was getting out of it as well. Feeling the way that his body expanded, burst out of belts sometimes and even was starting to get stuck in booths at the restaurants they frequented... there was a bliss in this... he just wanted to do it properly with Matthew at his side and just like his appetite, it was insatiable. He was no longer content with just being friends.
There was a knock on his dorm door. They had already made plans to go out again and while he wasn't ready in the slightest, he knew that his outfit (or lack of since he didn't fit in the button down that couldn't even close or his pants) would get the answer he wanted.
Opening the door, he heard Matthew's voice. "Gunwookie~ Are... you..." The happy voice trailed off before he looked down at the gut that was staring straight at him as he swallowed dryly. "I'm up here, hyung." Matthew's gaze needed to be torn away from the plump mass before Gunwook smiled. "Wanna order in?"
The feeling of Matthew's muscular body crashing into him and jostling his belly enough that the buttons he managed to get closed break told him everything that he needed. He had went all-in and got the pay out that he wanted... and soon, he was sure that he'd need to upsize again anyways now that his boyfriend was showing him just how much he appreciated that excess on his body.
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"Pssh, whatever," Leo scoffed playfully when Arjun started giving him a hard time. "My ego would have to get pretty big before I needed help carrying it. I mean, look at me." At this, Leo raised his free arm and flexed before curving it back downward to flex his chest and abs as well, but it was all for show because then he began to laugh. Leo wasn't vain - well, except for maybe his hair - and he actually didn't have that big of an ego at all. He was very aware of his flaws. But with Arjun, Leo was a different person, one who saw all the good things, and he thought that that was probably because he was seeing himself through Arjun's eyes. Still laughing, Leo looked over at Arjun, wanting to see his reaction to the little show he had just put on; making Arjun laugh was one of his favorite things. "Yes, majestic," Leo confirmed. "That doesn't just mean like royalty. To me, it's kind of like...just having a fuck ton of grace, dignity, poise...beauty. You know, that sort of thing." His face felt just the slightest bit hot at his comment; Leo was always saying things like this to Arjun, and he often had this reaction because it just was not like him at all, not with other people at least.
Leo thought it was difficult for Arjun to talk about his mother, so he didn't ask about her; he knew his friend would share with him what he wanted to. So it was always nice when Arjun talked about her. That was something else Leo and Arjun shared: they had both lost their mothers, and nothing had been the same since. This tragedy was one of the things that connected them. "I understand why she said that," Leo told Arjun. "She was proud of you, and I get it. I'm proud of you too." He knew how much Arjun struggled sometimes, how much he had gone through, yet he just kept going. Leo on the other hand, he was a total mess. "My mother wouldn't be proud of me," he said softly, a thought he'd never said aloud before. But Leo was thinking about her a lot today; he thought he probably always would on his birthday.
As the two of them danced, Leo thought about their first meeting, smiling at what Arjun said. "Guys do that to you a lot, don't they?" he asked, shaking his head; those guys didn't know what they were missing out on. "Their loss," he added. Laughing, he told Arjun, "But you know, at the very beginning I thought kind of the same thing. I'd let you talk, take you back to my place, and then that would be that. But then I actually listened to you, and...well, here we are, like you said." Leo wasn't sure what it had been about Arjun exactly that had made him give the guy a chance, but he was glad that he had. He'd gotten a best friend out of it.
Then Leo laughed even more when he heard Arjun's confession - that was so like his friend, very much something he would do. "So you're telling me you broke the law and entered my home without permission?" he asked, but Leo was smiling as he said this; obviously he wasn't mad. More seriously, Leo reassured Arjun, "It's okay, yeah. I wouldn't have told you where I hide my spare key if it wasn't." When he had told Arjun where they key was, Leo had known full well that his friend at some point would use it. "Plus I'm getting a birthday surprise out of it, so how could I be angry about that?"
Listening to Arjun recall birthdays past, Leo realized another thing they had in common. They'd been so isolated from their peers in their youth, though there had been well-intentioned reasons for both of them. However, that didn't take away the sense of loss they felt because of it. "The last time I had a birthday party was my seventh birthday," Leo replied. "Sometimes if I had a friend in one of the new places we'd moved to, my mom might take us to the movies or something, but usually it was just the two of us." She'd done her best to make his birthdays special though, and Leo felt a sudden wave of sorrow. But it was hard to stay sad when he had his best friend here. "I hope you know that your next birthday is going to be fucking epic," Leo told Arjun with a wide grin on his face.
Though they were still dancing, Leo said, "Arjun...I kind of want to go see my birthday surprise now. You should have known it would be all I could think about." Grinning playfully and feeling a little like a child, Leo asked, "Can we go see it? Please?" He gave Arjun his best puppy dog eyes as he asked this.
Arjun laughed at Leo’s comment about “King Leonidas” going to his head, nudging his friend as they swayed to the beat. “You’re right. If your ego grows any bigger, I’ll have to call in backup to help carry it around,” he joked. But the teasing melted into something warmer when Leo called him majestic, the weight of the words settling over him with an unexpected fondness. Thankfully, the Spock ears covered most of his ears and hid how they turned red.
“Majestic, huh? You’re the first person to ever call me that,” he admitted with a grin, his eyes fixed on Leo. “My mother would say Chand - you are my greatest success.” I don't know what I did to be a success -- but there you have it." Leo had a way of grounding him, making him feel like he could take care of the woman he missed. It was like Leo’s acceptance allowed Arjun to breathe easier, like he could let down walls he didn’t even realize he had up.
As they danced, Arjun couldn’t help but notice how natural this felt, Leo’s arms steady around him, a comforting anchor in the noisy, crowded venue. He laughed softly as they moved, glancing up with a playful glint in his eyes. “If ‘your majesty’ is going to your head, then it’s definitely worth it. A little confidence never hurt anyone.”
But as Leo admitted what he’d first thought when they met, Arjun snorted. “I thought maybe you’d be one of those guys who’d listen to my stories for an hour, humor me, and then I’d never see you again,” he said, his smile lingering as he recalled their first encounter. “But here we are.” He knew Leo enjoyed the intimacy of physical touch and connection; he didn't begrudge him that -- he did wonder though why Leo had thought of him the first time they met.
Dancing with Leo felt like the best way to celebrate his friend’s birthday—all right, really it would be the cake that he had left in Leo's fridge and hot chocolate but this was also very good. To have the cake, he'd have to admit it was there in the first place.
As they swayed to the music, Arjun finally admitted, “You know, there’s actually more waiting for you back at your place. Just a few things—I, uh, may have let myself in and decorated a little. Nothing big.” He chuckled, scratching his neck in a bashful gesture. “Hope that’s okay.”
Admitting that much felt easy with Leo, like he’d finally found someone who wouldn’t mind his quirks or small surprises. He wasn’t sure why, but something about celebrating Leo’s birthday had felt like it was something he important he wanted to do.
“This is all new for me. I never celebrated birthdays with friends growing up. My mom was amazing, and she’d fill the house with philosophers, scientists, mathematicians, even the occasional guru… anyone with a brilliant mind, but never kids my own age.” He smiled, a hint of nostalgia in his eyes. “I learned a lot, but I always kind of wondered what it’d be like to have… well, a night like this, with people who actually felt like friends.
He gave Leo’s waist a playful squeeze, the honesty leaving him feeling a little overwhelmed. “So… I might have gone overboard.”
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VIV and JACKSON in SEX EDUCATION SEASON 4 (2023)
#sex education#sexeducationedit#sexeducationsource#sex education spoilers#dailynetflix#userbbelcher#chrissiewatts#tusercarolina#userreina#usergreta#cinematv#tvedit#viv odusanya#jackson marchetti#no one talk to me about how it's nice they stayed just friends they are in love and no i do not take criticism on that#**
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not to be a milennial but harry potter and the prisoner of azkaban really is that bitch....
#mom wanted to rewatch the movies so we've been going thru them <3#talk about a movie thats just like. grief. i turn into the jamie lee curtis halloween trauma supercut#SORRY..... the visuals are peak like that IS the hp vibe to ME and i am BLOWN AWAY this movie was made in 2004 it feels ahead of its time#the first two are so whimsical and magical enrapturing and this movie is like. a well worn cardigan. this feels 2011 cozycore to me#sorry but the introduction of lupin becoming a comforting trusted guardian type of figure AND the dementors representing hollow depression#this 13 yr old whos been kept in the dark on so many things being extra vulnerable prey to them bc of the severe trauma#but getting lessons on how to withstand that creeping dread.. through happy memories... still bonding w lupin increasngly ouagh...#the grief between them both over james and lily. also btw ofc defense against the dark arts being fighting yr fears through laughter. aaaaaa#and then sirius. black. im. i know we meme on the twelve years of it! in azkaban! but as a bitch whos now closer to those characters in age#and can appreciate and understand them obv more than i could when i was. a tween. that just hits like ok shit. VALID#so valid and real to see the child of your friends you knew at that age but who DIED and then see the friend who betrayed them#to see like the best of BOTH of them mirrored and living on in him and be like yknow what???? you WILL be protected frm that same fate#hoooo the briefest moment where harry might hope things will turn out okay. w sirius' name being cleared and peter having to explain himself#and sirius being like hey i get it if you want to stay w your family that is fine but. if you wanna move in w me...#(harry relaying this to hermione later as well. dreaming of a place fr just the two of them somewhere in the countryside#somewhere..... sirius might see the sky..... bc he thinks he would like that after all those years locked up do not even touch me rn.......)#only fr everything to turn to shit two friends fighting w deadly force. the chance to set this right slipping off into the night.#a million dementors descending relentlessly until utter exhaustion and certain death. some strange salvation? fight for a second chance?#but then still havign to say goodbye when they only just GOT this. and everything still being so. god. and lupin having to leave as well.#the thought of sirius also WANTING that guardian type connection but being forced to live in 1. a cave barely living more freely than before#2. then being confined to the stuffy somber abusive home he ran away from as a teen w that portrait still up there and everything.. bitch...#oh man the way i KNOW when we get to ootp (my favourite) its gonna leave me blasted into a million little pieces#the way i know shit like the knowing wink the entirety of the wall tapestry room scene and of course nice one james is gonna DESTROY me..#dont even talk to me abt that dark turn at the end of gof and how everything after gets soooo. god. w everything just getting destroyed and.#i cant even think abt it i cant even talk about it. wah#i dont care btw that they aged those guys up undermining how insanely young these people died. perfect casting fr the remaining marauders ok
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I’m like Johnny Truant in the tags of every goddamn post I make or reblog on this site and I’m not apologizing. If you want me to apologize come over to my house and you can talk to the minotaur about it
#House of leaves#im literally going insane these days I should go back to journaling but I’m also afraid of how far off the deep end I’ll go#Literally I am losing it and I’m being serious#I’m so fucking tired of being lonely and being left out and not being able to make connections#Sometimes I feel as if im doing things without realizing and no one is telling me about it#Other times it feels like I must have something incredibly wrong with my face or body and no one will say anything#People make plans and don’t bother to ask me if I want to join and then when I find out there’s a group chat that all my friends are in#Except me and when I asked if I could join I was given a bunch of reasons that were frankly bullshit why I couldn’t join#Are they talking shit about me? I know everybody there it’s not like I am a stranger#Am I just a stranger in this world as I unllikeable? I try my best to be nice and charitable but what am I missing?#Do I black out and say things and do things? Am I more mentally ill than I know?#The only reason (or one of the very few) why I stay alive is because of my horses because I know they would miss me and I already feel bad#Not seeing them everyday#I’m tired of being the odd one out I’m tired of being entertaining when necessary#I don’t want my only friends to be horses because it further alienates me from the rest of society and I just want to be accepted I’m not#Looking to fit in I just want connection and friendship and I can barely seem to manage that#Maybe I’m just not worth it.
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thinking really hard about logging into my old tumblr acc after being gone for like a year and a half cause i stumbled upon a post that led me to my old mutuals and i teared up a lil </3 but also i feel so ashamed i left without saying a word to anyone aaaa
#like i genuinely feel so bad for simply disappearing from people's lives :c#i used to talk to some of them daily and like even had plans to see one of them on holiday to another country?? like that level of close#and then well my mental health went to shit i took a semester off uni and disappeared from my irl friends' lives too for a good 6 months#some of my mutuals had my ig and we followed each other but i also haven't really been there much since dissappearing last year so#but i just snooped into some of their accounts and seeeing what they're up to made me want to talk to them sooo bad#everyone was so cool and kind and i miss them so much it's just i feel so guilty and also don't even know if i'm able to mantain constant#contact and conversations with people now. like it's been even hard for me to stay in touch with my irl friends aaa#why must my brain hate me so much and not let me socialize !! i used to be such an extroverted person what the fuck happened!!#i know some of them messaged me worried and i felt so guilty for not responding but i saw those dms when i was very much deppressed#so i never answered and now i feel like it's too late GOD!!#anyways at least it was nice snooping and seeing how they're doing i genuinely wish them only good things they're fucking great#maybe i just need to suck it up and just go back and talk to people again but i get so overwhelmed just thinking about it!!#okay it's like 4 am i'm posting this and maybe deleting it in the morning sorry for the rant i just am feeling a lot !!
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holy shit for the first time in ten years i forgot nicks birthday
#and ironically it was my friends video talking about march that clued me in#like fuck march passed and i didn't even notice it.... feels weird. very. weird.#jrnlsht#yikes he turned 40 this year#oh that makes me feel old lmao that makes me feel so old#i thought i had everything figured out when i was 25...of the two of us i was the one with the stable job that i loved#making art all day... and then staying up till 4am making art with nick#and like sadly literally not euphemistically#although those after hours set painting sessions did include some making out#he was such a mess back then#now we've swapped im the mess and he's the one with the stable job he loves#funny how life works out#i remember his 30th vividly his sister bought him this ridiculous bunch of balloons#which of course he hated#and he was forcing a smile cause he was trying to play nice and act like his life wasnt a total mess#and i just sat there giggling at him in his sisters kitchen with the balloons cause i could tell he was faking it#anyway it was fine i made it up to him with a much better present later that evening when we were alone :P#i dont think either of us ever imagined being this old#i certainly didnt#i remember the last time i touched his face a few years ago#it was the first time i realized that - oh- i could love wrinkles#bald with lines around his smile... it was still his face :)#but forgetting is a good thing#sometimes i need to let memories go and move on
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