#no one else has felt like a mutual afterwards

[frostyspinch]

they need a missedconnections for tunblr, i wanna find some of my old mutuals again :(

[svt17-imagines]

𝕽𝖔𝖔𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖙𝖊𝖘

ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ: ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʜᴀᴘᴘᴇɴꜱ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴏᴍʙɪɴᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴏʙꜱᴄᴇɴᴇʟʏ ʜᴏᴛ ʙᴇꜱᴛ ꜰʀɪᴇɴᴅ ꜱʟᴀꜱʜ ʀᴏᴏᴍᴍᴀᴛᴇ, ᴀ ʟᴏᴛ ᴏꜰ ꜱᴏᴊᴜ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴀ ɢᴀᴍᴇ ᴏꜰ Qᴜᴇꜱᴛɪᴏɴꜱ?

ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 14ᴋ

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: ꜱᴍᴜᴛ, ʟᴏᴛꜱ ᴏꜰ ᴅɪʀᴛʏ ᴛᴀʟᴋ, ᴘᴇɴᴇᴛʀᴀᴛɪᴠᴇ ꜱᴇx, ꜰɪɴɢᴇʀɪɴɢ, ᴏʀᴀʟ (ꜰ. ʀᴇᴄɪᴇᴠɪɴɢ)

ᴀ/ɴ: ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴍʏ ꜰɪʀꜱᴛ ꜰᴜʟʟ ꜱᴍᴜᴛ ꜰɪᴄ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡʜᴏʟᴇ ɴɪɴᴇ ʏᴀʀᴅꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ꜱᴜᴄʜ, ʜᴏᴘᴇꜰᴜʟʟʏ ɪ ᴅɪᴅ ᴏᴋᴀʏ ʟᴏʟ ɪ ꜰᴏᴜɴᴅ ᴍʏꜱᴇʟꜰ ɢᴇᴛᴛɪɴɢ ᴛᴏᴏ ᴡʀᴀᴘᴘᴇᴅ ᴜᴘ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴜɪʟᴅ ᴜᴘ ꜱᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ ɪꜱ ᴅᴇꜰɪɴɪᴛᴇʟʏ ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴏɴɢᴇʀ ꜱɪᴅᴇ, ʙᴜᴛ ʟᴇᴛ ᴍᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʟʟ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ!<3

—

You couldn’t contain the maniacal laughter that escaped your throat as Wonwoo choked on his drink, a coughing fit erupting as he reached for the closest napkin he could find.

“I’m sorry… what did you just say?” He held his forearm to his mouth, desperately trying to contain any remaining coughs still threatening to escape.

“You heard me.” You leaned back against the foot of the couch, your legs sitting criss cross on the floor while you knocked your head back to take another shot. You giggled afterwards, wiping any leftover soju from your lips. “No man has ever made me come. Not even Si-woo.”

It was an embarrassing thing to bring up in retrospect, especially to your roommate of three years who up until now you’d only ever sparingly told the details of your intimate life to. But who the hell even cared about pride anymore? 

Certainly not you… and certainly not the copious amount of alcohol currently traversing your system.

“But… you two were together for so long?” The confused expression on Wonwoo's face was downright adorable, and the subconscious urge to pinch his cheek was immediately pushed down. 

“All relationships take sacrifice, mine just so happened to be any chance of ever achieving orgasm.” You cringed outwardly as you thought back to a particularly tough memory. “I remember one time he rubbed my inner thigh for like fifteen minutes thinking it was my—“

“STOP!” He croaked out, cheeks flushing brightly as you released a loud cackle, your eyes tearing up at your precious best friend.

You and Wonwoo had first properly met at the start of college, which was baffling considering you both had gone to the same highschool for four years without uttering so much as a single word to one another. It wasn’t to say you'd been completely blind to his existence that entire time, he had just always been much more reserved and quiet back then.

Not to mention way too handsome for you to even think about approaching. 

If anything, the only people he ever really spoke with was your current mutual group of friends. You remembered meeting Seungkwan junior year, but it wasn’t until you were actually partnered as lab buddies in college that you’d grown close enough to get invited over for a pool party at his friend Soonyoungs place. Kwan had been in the middle of introducing you to Jihoon when a few people shouting from across the yard had stolen your attention, you could hardly recognize the goofy grinned boy who was getting flicked after losing a punishment game to be the same shy Wonwoo whom you’d only ever snuck spare glances at for the past four years.

The first thing you noticed was just how effortlessly funny he secretly was. Never in your life would you have guessed that Wonwoo, who only a few years prior refused to even make eye contact as you borrowed his pen, would’ve been right in front of you borderline screaming his lungs out into a karaoke machine. You and everyone else couldn’t breathe laughing as he strained to sing as high as his uncharacteristically deep voice could manage, all in an attempt to beat Soonyoung's high score. The entire night he continued to crack the most absurd one liners, which somehow felt even funnier because of just how impassive he usually was at school. You couldn’t contain the fit of giggles that escaped you practically every time he spoke, all while his hyungs encouraged him and wheezed in fits of laughter by your side.

The second thing you noticed was just how much the two of you actually had in common, your first real conversation sparking from an in depth discussion of FPS games, resulting in a borderline nerd off between the two of you for the rest of the party. You both got along so well that you had made plans for a duo match later that night, which then led into exchanging numbers, and then discord tags. You soon discovered a mutual love of classic movies, which turned into weekly film nights, then sleepovers, which led to grabbing breakfast together, then lunch… The two of you eventually spent so much time together that Wonwoo suggested you become roommates.

It was an offer that you agreed to almost instantly.

It worked perfectly. You each liked to have your own space, but not too much as you both got lonely pretty frequently. And the best part about two introverts living together meant that you also understood each other's social battery, which for some reason never really drained around Wonwoo. It wasn’t uncommon for one person to knock on the other's door out of boredom, asking to have a movie night or a meal together, or even just relax quietly in each other's presence. He was easy to talk to, listened to your ramblings and never judged. You’d rant to him whenever anything bothered you or made you upset, but you always made sure not to take it too far as you never wanted to risk making him uncomfortable.

But you were feeling a bit too loose tonight, maybe it was the alcohol buzzing through your system or the fact that you had just dumped your boyfriend a few days prior. Maybe it was the frustration you’d been bottling up at how shittily your, now ex, treated you for the past year. Everything was slipping through your lips a lot easier than usual, even the information you typically kept close to your chest was pouring out without any filter.

As was evidenced by the abrupt confession about your sex life.

“I thought things were, um, really good between you two on that front?” Wonwoo let out, his brows furrowing together in pure confusion. “I mean you never really talked to me about that stuff, but the noises coming from your room—“

“Fake. All of it.” You snorted, and the look on Wonwoo’s face was so comical you had to force your dizzy head not to fall over laughing. “What can I say, I’m one hell of an actress.”

Wonwoo had to practically wrench his gaping mouth shut, taking a swig of his beer as he seemed to mull over that information. You knew he wasn’t a big drinker, but after you came home practically begging to have a few drinks together to get your mind off of the hellish week you’d had he couldn’t just say no. Letting him have a few beers was the best you could compromise, as you were left to down the harder alcohol sitting in front of you both.

“Is that why you guys broke up?” He asked carefully, testing the waters. Your eyes widened slightly, realizing you’d never actually explained the details to Wonwoo, partially because the wound was still fresh but also because it was yet another embarrassing situation that made you feel small and vulnerable. You gave him a gentle smile and shook your head no, allowing the alcohol to explain for you.

“He’d been texting other girls for the past three months.” You sighed, pouring yourself another glass. “Wasn’t even careful about it either, he got a tinder and a hinge notification while I was over one night. What a dumbass.” 

You downed the shot, this one burning your throat slightly more than the rest and you scowled at the feeling. It pissed you off, the fact that you wasted a year of your life with such a shithead and there was nothing to show for it in the end. Wonwoo’s silence might’ve been your cue to shut up if you’d been sober, but your inebriated brain just took it as an invitation to continue.

“I think the part that confused me the most was that I actually felt so relieved when I found out.” You put the shot glass on the coffee table, Wonwoo raised a brow in surprise. “I mean yeah, I was fucking furious about it. Woke that asshole up by dumping a cup of water directly on his head, packed my stuff and didn’t look back once.”

You fidgeted with the soju bottle, thinking over all the conflicting feelings you’d been working through the past few days. “But once I saw those notifications on his phone it really just kinda put everything into perspective for me, I guess. I don’t think I ever once actually imagined a future with the guy. I think, secretly, I always wanted some kind of excuse to end things.” 

You adjusted your hand, even all the alcohol in your system suddenly wasn’t enough. “It probably makes me a bitch to say this, but I don’t think I meant it a single time I told him I loved him.” You winced slightly at your own words, a sliver of guilt trailing up your spine. “I would’ve felt bad if I didn’t say it back, you know? We were together for a while, and it’s not like I’m getting any younger.”

Wonwoo shook his head. “You’re not a bitch.” Your eyes shifted to study his face, his expression concerned but his eyes soft. “I’ve been here the entire time, every fight and every argument. The guy was a douchebag.”

You offered him a grateful smile, Wonwoo was always there. He comforted you and listened to you during even the absolute worst moments of your relationship, but never once did he tell you to break up with him. It confused you, since most of your friends came to that very same conclusion any time you so much as brought Si-woo’s name up. 

“... Why don’t you ever… talk bad about him?” You remembered sniffling into a crumpled tissue, leaning into Wonwoo’s shoulder after finishing a particularly rough venting session. You’d just bawled your eyes out after the usual spat with Si-woo, and Wonwoo was rubbing slow, comforting circles on your back.

He furrowed his brows together and paused his motions. “What do you mean?” 

“You listen to me cry and complain about him so much, usually Hao or Jihoon get sick of it and tell me to just dump him already.” You hiccuped slightly, and you noticed his lip curl up in amusement. “But you never say anything… Doesn't it bother you? That I still stay with him even after all of this?” 

“I hate that you’re hurting, and I don’t like seeing you sad.” He frowned slightly, and brushed a strand of hair from your tear stained cheeks. “But if you have to cry, I’m just glad I can be here so you’re not feeling these things alone.” 

He playfully placed his index finger between your eyebrows and pushed your head back softly, you laughed and another hiccup escaped “I trust that you would leave him if you felt like it was the right thing to do. I don’t think offering up solutions and badmouthing him while you’re in so much distress will help anything.” His gentle smile practically froze you in place, the genuineness in his tone melting away any lingering tears. 

“I’m always here, if you ever need someone to just listen.”

That singular moment provided you more comfort than you could ever remember receiving from someone. You weren’t scared to talk about your feelings anymore, you didn’t have to hide your emotions around Wonwoo like you might’ve done around the other guys. But it also disappointed you to a certain degree, because in all honesty if there was anyone you wanted to tell you to end things with Si-woo… It was him.

You knew you’d developed feelings for Wonwoo about a month after meeting him. It wasn’t hard, with how easily the two of you had bonded and how breathtakingly handsome he was. It was more difficult to actually keep it a secret, as you were both practically inseparable and he was always looking at you with such kind eyes and the prettiest smile. 

The thought of confessing never so much as crossed your mind. You never dared even speak about it aloud, not even to your friends, but the feelings involuntarily stuck around longer than you anticipated. One month of friendship turned into two, then three turned into four, and when you hit a year was when it all came to a crashing stop.

Your friend Mingyu had set Wonwoo up on a blind date with someone from his job, and they ended up becoming official not long after.

Hana was her name, gorgeous with long dark hair and wispy lashes, she had a model figure and the most charming Daegu dialect. She suited Wonwoo well, the two of them immediately becoming an absolute powerhouse of a couple in terms of visuals. You congratulated your friend and his new girlfriend with smiles and squeals of course, but it did nothing to stop the silent cries you’d given your pillow the weeks following. It took time, it took effort, and it took a lot of strength, but you eventually got past it. 

Si-woo was your first venture into dating after properly getting over your little crush, about a year after Hana and Wonwoo got together. He treated you like a princess in the beginning, and you had to admit it helped soothe that leftover ache.

It was the small moments, the good moments with Si-woo where you felt yourself properly moving forward, moving past all those lingering feelings. But it was the bad moments that made you regret it, the ones where he would search through your phone while you went to the bathroom, the ones where he would ignore you for days because you were laughing a little too much at one of Dokyeom’s jokes, the ones where he wouldn’t take you on any dates unless you agreed to pay for them.

It wasn’t right, all your friends knew it and you did too, but routine can be a scarily addictive thing.

You remember being proud of yourself for not feeling much when Wonwoo had told you he and Hana had broken up, roughly a month into your own relationship with Si-woo. Obviously you felt concern for your friend’s wellbeing, for his mental state and whether or not he was heartbroken over it all. But you didn’t squeak in concealed excitement, you didn’t jump for joy behind closed doors, and you didn’t go to bed picturing yourself and Wonwoo’s first date like you probably would have a year prior.

You might’ve felt a little bit of happiness. But only a little.

“Look at you, finally saying something bad about him.” You chuckled, watching your own hand pour soju into a glass as if you had no control over it. “I’m surprised you held back for so long, Hao always had lots of creative words to describe Si-woo. “

“I’m not gonna lie, keeping it in was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.” You snickered outwardly as he exhaled. “But you needed someone to listen. That was much more important than making it known how badly I wanted to shove his head into a wall.”

“Tell that to Cheol, he almost strangled the guy when I told him half the shit he did.” A sigh escaped and you softly swished the soju against the shot glass. “I mean honestly, when he used to get mad at me for hanging out with the guys? Calling the video games I played childish, nagging me if I wore something even slightly revealing to class, the list goes on and on.”

Wonwoo shook his head with a huff. “I never knew how you dealt with him, I respected it, but I never understood it.”

“I honestly have no idea either, dude.” You exhaled, your cheeks puffing as you leaned your head back to look at the ceiling fan. “What’s even worse is I faked so many orgasms for that fucker just so he wouldn’t feel bad, I gave the performance of a goddamn lifetime too!”

“You were doing charity work honestly.” He chuckled, sipping his beer once more. “I don’t think I remember you ever saying a single good thing about the guy while you were together, isn’t that crazy?”

“That’s because there wasn’t.” You snickered, your eyes glancing to look at Wonwoo once more. “The worst was when we fought about you, though.”

His brow furrowed in confusion. “Me?” You nodded, smiling at his expression. “You never once mentioned you guys having arguments because of me?”

“I never wanted you to feel bad because of it.” You shrugged a single shoulder, the rest of your muscles completely relaxed. “You’re my roommate. You’re also an attractive guy. He was a controlling and jealous asshole. It’s pretty easy to put two and two together with how he’d react.” 

Wonwoo seemed conflicted, as if unsure whether to apologize for causing issues or to agree with the sentiment of Si-woo being a terrible partner. Your next words came out like an echo, and your mind was much too slow to stop them from spilling out before they reached your tongue.

“To be fair, he was right to be worried.”

A stifling silence fell upon the cozy living room, and you weren’t even able to fully process what you had actually said because you were too busy taking another shot. The movement of it made you feel fuzzy, and the look Wonwoo was giving you made you giggle.

“What? What’s that supposed to mean?” His eyes were slightly narrowed, and his mouth looked oh so attractive at the moment you just wanted to crawl over and nibble on it. A stray laugh escaped your mouth.

“I had a crush on you, dumbass.” You hiccuped, using your hands to emphasize something large. “A biiiiig one, a long time ago~”

You reached down to pour another shot but Wonwoo stopped your hand. You frowned, watching as he brought the soju bottle and glass to his side and away from you. 

“If you’re just gonna sit there drinking your little beer like a baby, one of us has to at least finish all the real alcohol!” You whined, pushing your arm out and attempting to snatch the bottle back weakly.

Wonwoo was still for a moment, and instead of giving in to your complaints proceeded to take a long swig from the bottle itself. You couldn’t hide the dumb grin growing on your face as he drank it all down in one go, a couple of coughs escaping to show his unfamiliarity with the drink.

“There, all gone. No more for you.” He spoke while clearing his throat, and your head was barely able to comprehend the fact that he was right. The bottle Wonwoo had just finished was the last, everything else on the table being empty or with just enough to fill a cap full. You groaned.

“We should go get moreee, you need to get on my level so we’re even.” You grunted, attempting to stand up from your seat on the floor but stumbling and falling back down in your original spot. 

“I don’t think any amount of alcohol would ever get me to the state you’re in right now.” Wonwoo chuckled, his voice low and deep, practically giving you goosebumps. “You should get ready for bed before you black yourself out.”

“You promised you’d distract me from my shitty week, if you send me to my room all I’m gonna do is drive myself insane thinking about everything.” You pouted, swaying slightly and giving your roommate a questioning brow. “Are you going back on your word? Abandoning your drunk, sad, pitiful friend like this?”

Wonwoo let out a deep sigh and you knew you had him, he grabbed his beer once more and took his final sip of it before placing it on the coffee table. “Fine, what do you want to do?”

“Games.” You clapped excitedly, shaking your head when Wonwoo started crawling over to set up the PlayStation a few feet from you both. “Not video games, board games! Or a card game or something.”

“I’m pretty sure we left all our physical stuff at Jun’s place last time we all hung out.” Wonwoo frowned after peering through the glass cubbies of your media cabinet. “I’m not sure we have anything here to play with.”

You thought for a moment, eyeing down the empty shot glass when the idea sprang up almost instantly. “What about ‘Questions’? We haven’t played that in so long!”

“A drinking game? Did you forget that I just downed the rest of the alcohol?” Wonwoo motioned to the table, scratching the back of his neck. “The whole point is to drink if you can’t answer.”

“We can just answer everything then!” You snickered, watching as Wonwoo rubbed his eyes under his glasses, no doubt exhausted by your behavior tonight. “Orrrr we can bet. Whoever doesn’t answer first has to do whatever the winner wants.”

He looked at you for a moment, considering. Those spare seconds allowed your delirious mind to subtly ogle your roommate, your mouth drying up just from a mere once-over of him. He picked out the most basic, comfortable clothes he owned, a plain cotton black tee with loose fitting black sweats, and yet it always baffled you how he still managed to look runway ready. His long black hair was messy, and the itch to run your hands through it all was interrupted when Wonwoo moved to settle in and leaned his elbow on the table, his chin resting in his palm.

“Fine, deal. You first then.” He nodded towards you and you couldn’t help the feelings of excitement and happiness that bubbled up in your stomach. You sat up straight to think.

“If you had to make out with one of the guys, who would you choose?” You cackled loudly as Wonwoo scrunched his face in disgust at the question. He hesitated for a while, and you grinned thinking you might’ve already won.

“Jeonghan, but specifically when he had his long hair.” You let out a noise of approval but he visibly shivered at the thought. “I’d simply close my eyes and try not to think about it.”

“Hot.” Wonwoo threw a stray couch pillow at your face in retaliation and you snorted a laugh. “Jokinggg~ It’s your turn.”

“… So, when exactly did you have that little crush on me?” You rolled your eyes.

“Not letting that confession slip past, I see?” You scoffed at his small self satisfied smirk, the urge to kiss it off fighting every nerve in your intoxicated head. “You’re so obvious, trying to fluster me… but I’m over it buddy. Those dazzling charms don’t work on me anymore!”

“I’m not hearing an answer.” Wonwoo hummed, the corner of his eyes crinkling to match his smile. “Should I take that as me winning? Or~”

You sighed and gave in reluctantly. “A few weeks after becoming friends.” His smile turned to a look of genuine surprise and you suddenly felt a bit self conscious at airing it all out.

“That early on?” He spoke uncharacteristically gently, and you nodded slowly. His brow furrowed. “Why didn’t you ever tell me—“

“Woah there buddy, not your turn anymore!” You laughed a bit anxiously, already trying to think of a question that would get him to lose lest he keep pressing the subject. “My turn now!”

Wonwoo appeared disappointed but motioned a hand for you to continue. The hammering in your chest was a little too hard, and you weren’t sure if it was just because of the soju anymore.

“Why did you and Hana break up?” You spoke softly. In your head it was a sure fire way of winning, he had never told anyone the reason, not even the guys. You respected his privacy enough not to prod the subject, but you figured if there was any time to casually ask about it, it was while the soju was still thrumming strong in your veins. He stayed quiet for a few beats, and right when you were sure you had won, he sighed before answering. 

“We never actually loved each other.” He spoke quietly, almost to the point where you had to strain to hear him. “We distracted each other for a decent amount of time, but that’s pretty much it.”

You knitted your brows together, shocked at how his one answer managed to cause a million other questions to run through your mind. What on earth did he mean by that? Him and Hana were a match made in heaven as far as you were able to see, both of them practically glowing whenever they had each other around. They never fought, always went on dates, hell she even stayed over at the apartment a few times.

“When did it stop?” Wonwoo’s voice tore you out of your own racing thoughts, and you looked at him dumbly.

“What?”

“The feelings you had for me.” He specified, his tone a lot more serious compared to when you began. “When did they stop?”

You swallowed dryly. If you were to be completely honest with yourself, they never went away. The overwhelming crush you had on him had been gone for a while now, but nothing ever really stopped those lingering feelings that still sat heavy in the back of your chest. If they were gone, why were you still finding him as gloriously kissable as the day you’d met.

“When you started dating Hana. I officially gave up around that time.” You let out whatever the liquor allowed you to, trying not to ponder too hard on it. “I mean, I couldn’t exactly have feelings for a taken guy, what would that make me?” An awkward chuckle escaped as you did your best to diffuse the tension a bit.

Wonwoo’s expression was unreadable, and your brain wasn’t even focused on the game anymore. Your head simply became muddled with questions, barely able to remember that you were only allowed to ask one at a time.

“What do you mean by ‘distracted each other’?” It was an odd thing to say no matter how you put it, and there was no guarantee that even if Wonwoo felt that way that Hana did as well. And maybe it was a delusional one track minded bias towards your roommate, but you didn’t want to think that he was just using her either.

“When Mingyu set us up, I had feelings for someone else at the time.” Your eyebrows raised in surprise at the new piece of information, Wonwoo distracted himself by picking at his fingernails. “And when I met Hana, she told me she had feelings for someone else as well. But she said that it would never work out, she was extremely resigned to that fact.”

It took you all but a minute to put the pieces together.

“… Mingyu?” You asked, Wonwoo nodded.

“The person she liked most set her up on a dozen blind dates, how much harder can you really friendzone someone?” You nodded in understanding, feeling a heavy amount of pity for the poor girl. “My own self confidence was pretty low at the time, so we kind of just saw ourselves in one another. We did actually try dating at first but it never really felt right, it became more like a mutual partnership than anything else. We talked a lot, mostly about how hard it was to bottle everything up. We’d go out but would never hold hands, we’d sleep over but I would always take the floor, I’d pat her back while she sobbed over Mingyu and she’d listen to me vent till we knocked out. We just… helped each other. Distracted ourselves for a bit.”

You nodded in thought, noticing a small weight lift off your chest. What he had with Hana was companionship, it was sweet and caring but never romantic. It slightly fascinated you that they were able to maintain such a platonic relationship for an entire year, and baffled you even more that neither even came close to falling for each other when they were both such attractive people inside and out.

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?” Wonwoo’s voice came out slightly strained, prompting you to give him your full attention. He suddenly seemed… frustrated? Upset? You weren’t sure, but the tightening of his jaw and downward gaze made your heart clench just from looking at him.

You could’ve lied, you could’ve said a half truth like being scared of ruining your friendship or that you just hadn’t thought about all that in forever. The alcohol flowing through your bloodstream had other plans though, and you had no restraint as you felt the real answer pour out without a second guess.

“What? And embarrass myself?” You laughed airily, watching Wonwoo’s expression tighten slightly. The most you could offer him was a shrug. “It was more like a fantasy to me, something I used to daydream about. Trust me, I am very self aware of where I rank on the attractiveness scale, especially compared to you. Telling you would’ve done nothing but humiliate the shit out of me, and getting rejected would have sent me spiraling.”

Wonwoo frowned, looking up at you with his brows scrunched in concentration. “Did I do something to come across as unapproachable to you? I hope you know I’d never ever make you feel bad over something like that.”

You shook your head immediately. “Nothing like that at all.” The fuzziness in your brain made your words slur a bit, and you paused before continuing. “I just meant I’ve always thought of you as way too out of my league to even consider—“

Silence.

Wonwoo’s conflicted expression dropped altogether, a small smile forming not too long after. Fine, maybe you’d just hinted that you still thought that way now. But what did you have to lose at this point? He knew about the crush, and there wasn’t much else for you to really expose about yourself. The feeling was oddly liberating, not having to hide or keep it all in anymore. Surely your sober self will be mortified in the morning, but right now you were simply enjoying the freedom that came with your inebriated state.

Just when you were about to scoff out something about never boosting his ego like that ever again, you noticed that the smile that had appeared faded just as quickly. You held your breath, his gaze becoming stone serious.

“I never want to hear you bringing yourself down like that, you have it completely backwards.” The sudden sincerity in his tone took you by complete surprise. “I’m sorry if I’ve ever come across as indifferent to you, but I do think you have severely underestimated just how breathtaking you are.”

Your eyes widened, utterly dumbfounded by the abrupt admittance. In the past three years Wonwoo had only explicitly called you attractive a handful of times, each one forever being burned into your memory as something to cherish. Granted it wouldn’t exactly have been appropriate for him to constantly be calling you hot while he had a girlfriend or when you had a boyfriend, but it just made the flattery he did give that much more heartfelt and genuine. 

You felt your cheeks burn warm and you suddenly became incredibly overwhelmed by the temperature of the living room, pressing the back of your palm to your forehead briefly in a half-assed attempt to cool your face. You offered him a small smile, trying to play off how affected you become just from his praise alone.

“Jeon Wonwoo,” you begin, a mock warning in your voice. “You’re not sly, I know you’re still trying to fluster me.”

“Maybe my goal is to get you to fall for me all over again~” He wiggled his brow, and you felt your eyes roll back for the millionth time that night. “Your turn, go.”

You tried to think of anything other than the one real question that kept stubbornly pushing its way into the front of your mind. You knew it had the power to either help you move on, hurt you, or… something else. You weren’t sure, but one look at Wonwoo and it felt almost as if he knew what you were thinking. Without wasting another second, the question tumbled out without a spare thought.

“You mentioned having feelings for someone when you started dating Hana…” You licked your lips, trying to sound as casual as you could but failing miserably. “Who was it?”

The stare you gave Wonwoo was anything but subtle, but you didn’t care. Your heart pounded, palms sweated, face heated as you found that you didn’t care to hide it anymore. It had been years since the “end” of your crush and you had already spilled everything tonight, the least he could do was give you the closure you’d been craving all this—

“You.” 

You froze, your breath catching in your throat as Wonwoo offered a genuine smile. You simultaneously wanted to smack it off and kiss it off at the same time. You had to remind yourself that this was years ago he was talking about, not now. It was the only thing grounding you to the spot and keeping yourself from lunging at him.

“You’re such a dumbass.” You let slip, making Wonwoo’s smile fall slightly from his face. “What kind of idiot gets into a relationship with another girl when he has a crush on someone else? Talk about self sabotage.”

“Now how the hell was I supposed to know you liked me too?”

“Dude, you really think I actually enjoyed just sitting there and watching you play League for five hours straight?”

“Do you think I enjoyed driving you to the official Sanrio store every week to look at the same five plushies you were never gonna buy?”

“… Touché.” 

You both let out a stream of chuckles, but your muddled mind couldn’t let go of the fact that at one point in time, you both had feelings for one another. The guy who you dreamt and fantasized about for a year straight had liked you. Not only that, but he’d liked you even when he was with Hana, one of the most beautiful girls you’d ever seen. Your heated blood combined with the temperature of the room grew to be almost unbearable.

“If you don’t mind me asking, then…” You picked at a stray thread coming from the bottom of your shorts to keep yourself busy. “When did the feelings stop? On your end, I mean.” 

You looked up at Wonwoo when he remained quiet, his expression unreadable. You raised an irritated brow at him when you couldn’t handle the silence anymore, and he grinned mischievously.

“I would answer, but it’s not your turn~” He hummed, you groaned.

“Fine, go.” He didn’t even hesitate to ask his next question, your entire body tensed.

“You said the thought of us together was like a fantasy to you,” your finger that had been picking at a thread pulled it out a little too harshly, “what kinda stuff did you fantasize about?”

The copious amount of alcohol in your bloodstream wasn’t nearly enough to answer any easier than if you were sober. You couldn’t quite look at his face, but felt only a portion of the truth slip past your lips. It took every ounce of strength in your body to restrain yourself from exposing more than needed.

“Just, you know, stuff that everyone thinks about when they like someone.” You shrugged, fighting the blush creeping up your neck. “Going on dates, holding hands, sometimes kissing…”

“Being intimate?” Wonwoo asked and you froze, indirectly answering the question for him. “Was I good at it? In those fantasies?”

You didn’t need to look at him to realize he was probably just messing with you now, and you suddenly felt a small rush of regret for the potential ammo you’ve just given him to tease you for the years to come. Sure, he’d confessed his past feelings too, but that was still nothing in comparison to just how much you’d spilled about yourself tonight.

“Have you ever thought about me? When you were—“

“It’s my turn!” You interjected, eager to get a break from embarrassing yourself further. “You need to answer my question first.” 

He shut his mouth and nodded, sitting back slightly with his hands relaxing in his lap. Perhaps it was wishful thinking or the soju clouding your brain, but after finally looking at his face again you noticed he seemed to be more genuinely curious than joking. His posture was straight, and his demeanor was surprisingly serious for someone who only meant to tease you.

“Same question I asked before.” You spoke softly, looking him up and down. “When did your feelings stop?”

Your heart practically stopped beating when he shook his head, his posture still stiff and seemingly anxious. You crinkled your brow, unsure if you actually understood the meaning of his response.

“They didn’t.” He spoke a bit shakily with a nervous grin plastered on, you felt a clump form in the back of your throat. “I ended things with Hana because I started feeling bad. We used to be pretty balanced when it came to communication, but after you started dating Si-woo… Let’s just say she listened to me vent a lot more than was healthy for either of us.”

You stayed quiet and unbearably still, afraid that moving would wake you from the potential dream you were currently experiencing.

“No matter how hard I tried, I’ve just never been able to stop thinking about you.” He mumbled carefully, eyeing your reaction. “But that’s not to say I can’t suppress it, as long as I have you in my life at all I’m more than happy. Even if it’s just as friends—“

“I used to go to sleep imagining what your lips would feel like.” You croaked out before you could stop yourself. Wonwoo’s eyes widened. “They just… they always looked so soft… I wanted to kiss you until I felt like I couldn’t breathe anymore.” 

“Wh— What…” He stuttered out, swallowing loudly. “Um, what else did you think about?”

“Whenever I went into your room while you were playing a game, I’d imagine you grabbing my waist and pulling me into your lap.” You shuddered slightly, watching Wonwoo’s eyes darken. “I thought about h-how your hand might feel squeezing my thighs, my waist… brushing under my shirt.”

“You remember that heat wave we had a few months ago? The one where our AC broke for a week straight?” He tilted his head slightly as he looked you up and down, you nodded your head slowly. “I lied about the maintenance guy being booked. I just wanted to see you walking around the apartment in that skimpy little tank top and those silk short-shorts a little longer.”

You smiled at that, your blood pumping faster at the thought that you might’ve affected him just as much as he affected you. Your eyes locked on the pair of lips that had plagued your mind for years and your mouth went dry.

“I used to think to myself a lot, about how hot you look in those glasses.” You spoke dumbly, biting your bottom lip as if to reign it in for the time being. “I always wanted to know if they stayed on. Whenever you…“

His brow raised almost instantly at your question, he smiled a little and adjusted the pair of glasses almost instinctively. You all but drooled at the sight, finding it nearly impossible to control anything at this point.

”They tend to either fall off or fog up, so I typically just take them off.” Wonwoo said, seeming to think over his next sentence carefully. “But I guess I wouldn’t mind trying to keep them on, if it was something my partner was into.”

You had to force yourself not to nod subconsciously, your veins thrumming at the very familiar fantasy of a half naked Wonwoo holding himself above you in his dorky little glasses. Instead you chose to shift your position to sit on your hands, lest your arms decide to reach out and touch the very tempting man seated across from you.

“Have you ever thought about me?” You scrunch your nose at Wonwoo, making it clear you didn’t fully understand his question. He let out a slightly shaky breath but spoke in a voice that oozed seriousness. “When touching yourself… Did the thought of me ever make you…”

You grinned and bit down the blunt ‘orgasm?’ that attempted to spring from your throat haphazardly. You looked towards the floor, still a slight bit anxious despite everything already having been aired in the open.

“I’d say nearly every time.” You chuckled softly, the silence that followed not going unnoticed. “I felt really guilty and awful, especially since I was dating Si-woo at the time and I also felt like I was objectifying my best friend. But then somehow it kinda ended up being the only way I could get that release, it’s fucked up I know… I should’ve just tried porn or something—“

“I thought you said you stopped liking me after I started dating Hana?”

You froze, gaining an entire arms worth of goosebumps at the note of realization in Wonwoo’s tone. You licked your dry lips, willing your voice not to crack.

“Uh, y-yeah. I did.”

“But you started seeing Si-woo after me and Hana got together.”

“O-oh, yeah you’re right I was probably just confused—“

“So you lied then?” Wonwoo’s posture was arrow straight, not a single hint as to what could possibly be happening in his brain. “You still liked me, even after I started dating Hana?”

You looked him in the eyes, mouth opening and closing but the words remained stuck in the back of your throat. He waited patiently, eyes locked in and tracking every move you dared to make, from the ragged breaths you took to your fidgeting fingers gripping the carpet fibers.

“… I lied.” You nodded, unable to look away from his piercing gaze. “I-I mean the enormous crush I had on you disappeared but… those feelings are still—“

Wonwoo didn’t wait for you to finish, he stood from his place across the coffee table and walked over to sit next to you. Your eyes followed his movements nervously, shifting awkwardly to give him a few inches of space.

Both of you now sat with your backs to the foot of the couch, your bodies facing forward with your heads turned towards one another. Wonwoo studied your face carefully and you swore you felt your cheeks burn an impossible shade of red.

“You know I won, right?” Wonwoo smiled softly, causing your intoxicated brain to stutter at the sudden shift in topic.

“What?” 

“You lied to me. That counts as refusing to answer a question.” He shrugged slightly. “That means I won the game.”

You huffed out in mild annoyance, acknowledging that there was some validity in his reasoning. You were the one who rattled on yourself, there was no sense in fighting him.

“Fine, you won.” You admitted with a sigh, pouting out your bottom lip. An act that immediately caught Wonwoo’s gaze, and you felt your heart pick up its pace slightly.

“I believe there was a bet in place too,” Wonwoo spoke slowly, inching slightly closer to your side, “the loser has to do whatever the winner wants,” he brought his hand to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear, his finger grazing your cheek and causing you to shiver, “do you remember?”

You nodded softly, anxiety and nervousness and excitement all bubbling up together in one big mesh of feelings within your chest. The proximity of your face to Wonwoo’s was close, but he was hesitating slightly and you were itching to pull him into you already.

“Is this okay?” Wonwoo asked shakily, cupping your chin and pressing his forehead to yours. “Is it okay if I kiss you?”

You nodded once more, a little too enthusiastically this time. Your hands slid up to wrap around his neck and lock him in place, as if subconsciously terrified of him changing his mind.

“God yes…” You practically whispered, Wonwoo smiled softly at your words. “Please, I—“

The kiss was gentle, at least at first. Nothing but the soft feeling of pressing lips together and the closeness it provided. And yet at the same time it felt like a gong being smacked in your head, ringing throughout your ears and reverberating throughout your entire body. The motion of his lips moving against your own combined with his scent, the feeling of his calloused thumb stroking your cheek so carefully, it made you feel lightheaded. It was as if you were floating on nothing, completely weightless, the only thing grounding you being Wonwoo’s lips on yours.

He pulled away too quickly, looking at you seemingly for some kind of confirmation that what you both were doing was still okay. You gave him another quick nod, and he immediately dove back in.

The second time was much more intense, both of your eagerness quickly surpassing Wonwoo’s original intent to keep it slow and steady. Your lips moved languidly, opening slightly in an attempt to deepen the kiss to which he hungrily accepted. His hand hurriedly shifted to the back of your head to grab a handful of hair and tug it gently, it lowered to your neck, to your shoulders, to your arms, your waist. He gave you a squeeze and pulled you closer, almost like he couldn’t feel enough of you as quickly as he wanted. You clung on to the back of his neck like your life depended on it, relishing in the firm grip of his hands on your waist.

Your blood was on fire, every inch of you burning to be touched and to get closer to him. Your head grew dizzy from the very thought that any of this was actually happening, that Wonwoo was kissing you like he needed it to survive, that you were kissing him back. You almost didn’t believe it was real, that any moment now you’d wake up in a puddle of sweat in your bed and panting like a damn dog. If your hands weren’t the only thing steadying you from the exhilarating feeling of Wonwoo’s lips on yours you might’ve tried pinching your thigh to wake yourself up.

After a few breathless moments Wonwoo pulled his mouth away, moving to kiss your jaw up and down, his favorite spot being right below your ear. The sound of his heavy breathing caused your entire body to shiver and you practically felt his smirk press into your skin. His mouth moved to the crook of your neck, licking slowly and sensually before sucking the places he especially liked. His mouth trailed back up your neck to nibble on a particularly sensitive spot and you involuntarily let out a small whine. 

Wonwoo froze, and you started panicking.

“Oh god I-I’m so sorry, I can’t believe I sound like that I’ll be more quiet—“

He dove back in to kiss you with a renewed fervor, his hands gripping your sides as if to anchor him as he let out a muffled groan. You gasped into his lips as he kissed you roughly, drinking you in as much as physically possible.

You couldn’t stop the satisfied smile that grew on your lips as you climbed yourself into Wonwoo’s lap, causing him to release an incredibly strained moan. His arms tightened around you, and his hands dipped under your sweater to make skin to skin contact with your waist. You arched into it, encouraging him as those same hands trailed up your back and down your spine, sending waves of tingles throughout your body. 

The two of you continued to kiss heatedly as Wonwoo proceeded to explore your stomach and upper ribs, not allowing himself nor you the pleasure of touching just a little higher and causing you to whine repeatedly. He seemed to partially enjoy being a tease, partially hate torturing himself by holding back.

“I-I can’t… Touch…” Wonwoo mumbled out between wet kisses, you eventually detached yourself from his mouth to return the favor of sucking and licking his neck, somewhat allowing him to get a few more words out. “I can’t touch you…”

You frowned slightly and nibbled on his collarbone before pulling away to face him. His hair was a wreck and sticking up everywhere, his glasses were fogged and barely hanging off the edge of his nose, his pale skin was beginning to flush and his eyes were lidded and dilated. If you hadn’t known that the guy had been sipping the same beer for the past two hours you might’ve thought he was completely hammered.

“Why? Why not?” You crinkled a brow, placing your hands around his own that had been gently stroking the skin just above your stomach. “It’d feel so nice, soft, sensitive…” You slowly inched his hands higher, and felt his fingers subconsciously brush against the underside of your breast. Wonwoo let out a surprised grunt and you silently celebrated your choice of going braless beneath your oversized sweater. You tilted your head all the way back and leaned into his touch with a whimper, trying to get him to do it again.

“Fuck, fuck…” Wonwoo practically whispered, his breath hitching as he closed his eyes in an attempt to regain his control. He took a few deep breaths but froze his motions completely much to your irritation, you huffed out in frustration and wiggled in his lap impatiently causing whatever remaining strings were left in him to snap.

He removed one of his hands and used it to pull you closer to him. His hand roughly gripped the back of your head to rest on his shoulder while his other traveled to your sternum, still not quite close enough to touch your breasts but enough to make you audibly groan out. 

“Are you trying to fucking torture me, huh?” He choked out, his already deep voice managing to go two octaves lower. “I’ve thought about this moment for years. You know how easily I could make you come right here? Right now?”

You whined and nodded quickly, feeling his hand sliding back downwards toward your navel. His mouth was pressed right against your ear, and the sound of his heavy breathing was fueling the boiling ache between your legs like nothing else.

“But no. I’m gonna take my time. I want to spend hours on you. I want to make sure you come back begging for me to touch you again.” His fingers trail the outline of your panties, causing you to shiver. “I’ll fuck you so good and dirty that it’s all you think about for months. You’ll be coming to my room in the middle of the night craving my tongue, and I guarantee my face will be buried between those thighs till you’re dumb and limp.”

Your entire body tensed up as the fire in your blood burned hotter, your whimpers became desperate as the desire to grind down on Wonwoo grew exponentially stronger. He seemed to catch on to this, immediately moving his hands to your hips to stall any movement. You groan out in irritation.

“But, I refuse to do any of that when you’re drunk.” His once incredibly lustful tone turned into one of gentleness and patience. You moved back from his shoulder to meet his eyes, gleaming with sincerity. “I need you to be completely aware of what we’re doing. I need you to be one hundred percent certain that this is something you want. And you definitely can’t do that right now.”

You pouted and were about to argue when you felt a spell of dizziness hit like a slap to the face. You gripped his shoulder to stabilize yourself, and his hold on your waist hardened to help steady you. 

“See I know you’re right, but part of me is even more turned on that you’re being a good person and not taking advantage of me.”

Wonwoo laughed audibly, his goofy smile warming your heart and instantly reminding you of how you came to fall for him in the first place. You leaned in to offer another slow, languid kiss to which he accepted. The fact that you could do that now, just kiss him whenever you wanted to, it was genuinely like a dream you never wanted to wake up from. You sneakily attempted to escalate the kiss before you felt your head being tugged back.

“That’s enough, bedtime.” You whined.

“Now tell me why the hell you riled me up that much if you were just going to send me to bed.” You frowned, pouting as Wonwoo chuckled.

“I held back for three years, do you have any idea how much self control it’s taking just for me to stop?” He smiled, fidgeting with a loose strand of your hair. “I can wait one more day, but first I need to make sure you don’t wake up regretting all this.”

You shook your head quickly, not wanting that thought to plague his mind for even a second. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders and leaned in to hug him, nuzzling your face into the crook of his neck.

“Never. I could never regret any of this.” You murmured, feeling your eyes flutter shut. A rumbling from his chest that indicated a soft laugh reverberated through your body, and you distantly felt yourself getting picked up off the ground and taken into your own bed.

As you felt the familiarity of your blankets and sheets being tucked in tightly around you, you realized he had no intention to stay. It took ninety nine percent of your inebriated brain’s capacity, but you managed to quickly snatch one of his hands before he turned to go to his own room.

“Stay tonight..” you mumbled out without even opening your eyes, you felt his hand tense. “I won’t do anything, just stay…”

The last thing you felt was the feeling of the bed sinking in next to you as you drifted into a dreamless sleep.

-

You were hot.

Extremely hot.

Did you forget to take off your clothes before bed last night? You typically slept in your underwear for that exact reason.

You shifted your legs slightly and grunted out when you felt the thick lining of your favorite sweatpants rub against one another. No wonder.

You adjusted your position in an attempt to remove the pants when you suddenly found yourself locked in place, a heavy weight over your shoulder pressing down and restricting you from moving freely. Not only that, a warm, soft hand was gently wrapped around your own.

Your eyes flew open as you suddenly became extremely aware of the predicament you’d put yourself in. His breathing felt slow and steady, indicating that the former still hadn’t woken up yet. His mouth seemed to be directly behind your neck, if the warm air continuously tickling the back of it was any indication. You let out a small shiver at the feeling.

And to make matters even worse, the hard length that seemed to be poking into your leg definitely belonged to none other than the guy you viciously made out with last night. 

IT WAS REAL?!

The splitting headache you’d initially felt completely dissipated as you instead focused on your actions last night. Your first thoughts began with denial, the truth that you’d spilt the entirety of your guts and more to your roommate and best friend who���d just been trying to cheer you up… it was humiliating. Not only that, you practically threw yourself into his lap and shoved your tongue down his throat.

You closed your eyes tightly as you held back the urge to sneak out of bed and run to the nearest airport. Maybe you could vacation to America for a bit, you spoke a decent amount of English, you could get by. Just long enough for Wonwoo to forget how desperate you had behaved last night—

I will never recover from this…

Next came the anger at yourself for drinking that much in the first place, what did you think was going to happen?? You were freshly single, drinking an absurd amount of alcohol around the guy you’d been fantasizing about since you MET him. You could barely control your hormones when you were sober, nevermind when you’re completely wasted.

Yeah, big genius you were.

Not only that, the two of you are roommates. What if things got awkward now? What if you had to avoid each other, what if he’s grossed out—

Wait.

…

He wasn’t grossed out.

In fact, if you remembered correctly, he had muttered absolute filth into your ear about what he wanted to do with you. He’d even been encouraging it as much as you were egging him on, he liked you back. He admitted it himself—

OH MY GOD?!

WONWOO LIKED YOU BACK?!

Your eyes opened once more and your jaw dropped slightly in realization, the soft snores from the man behind you had slowed to a halt and you felt your body tense. His limbs stirred and he lifted his head groggily to check if you were awake.

“Good Morning…” His raspy morning voice caused a tingle to run through your spine, and he didn’t even hesitate to offer a small kiss on your temple before laying back down. Your heart melted, and you slowly moved to pinch yourself slightly just to double check.

It seemed he was hit with a reality check of his own too though, because not long after the kiss you felt his entire body stiffen. He stuttered out, trying to form a sentence but struggling.

“I— uh… are you? O-OH!! Oh I am so sorry—“ 

He cleared his throat and shifted back slightly, enough so that you wouldn't be able to feel his “morning problem” against you. Your face flushed as you found yourself disappointed by its absence.

“I—it’s okay…” you coughed out, voice hoarse and mouth dry from all the alcohol you’d consumed the night prior. “I didn’t really mind…”

Wonwoo hesitated for a beat but never removed his arms from being wrapped around you, which you took as a good sign. You placed your free hand atop his and squeezed, boldly snuggling further back into his arms to let him know you were okay with being held by him. His muscles relaxed, squeezing you tightly in return and nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck.

“Do you… Remember last night?” Wonwoo mumbled into your skin, goosebumps prickling your arms at the feeling. “You drank so much, I wouldn’t be surprised if you blacked any of it out…”

“… I remember everything.” You confirmed in a small voice, still a bit anxious for some reason. “At least I think I do? I could have definitely just imagined some portions, I’m not too sure what was fantasy and what was reality.”

Wonwoo laughed softly and you had to admit it was a bit embarrassing, knowing that he was practically sober all night while you had drowned your sorrows in soju and were unable to trust your own recollections.

“How about you tell me what you remember and I’ll let you know if it happened or not then?” Wonwoo suggested, and you felt your heart rate quicken at having to say it all aloud again. You knew that at least some of your memories had to be real, judging from the forehead kiss he’d given you and the clinginess he’d been showing, but what if you had completely imagined the steamy parts? It would be even more embarrassing…

You were way too sober to go through this again.

You sucked in a breath and started easy. “I confessed that I used to have a crush on you last night.”

“Wrong.” Your heart stopped briefly. “You confessed that you still have a crush on me last night. Present tense.”

You elbowed his side softly, causing a deep chuckle to escape his chest. “You know what I meant.” Still, a small bit of pressure was slightly lifted off your shoulders at his confirmation. “You told me you have feelings for me too.”

Wonwoo nodded his answer, his head still buried into your neck. You smiled at that, never once thinking that him returning your crush was even a possibility in the past.

“We—“ you paused, treading into dangerous territory. “We kissed… a lot. I got on your lap.”

You felt him clench his fingers around your own slightly. And before he could confirm or deny the claim, you rushed to get the rest out as well.

“You said some things… Some really, really dirty things…”

“I did.” Wonwoo spoke stiffly, probably embarrassed in his own way. You felt a rush of excitement at the confirmation, and a bit of nervousness as his rigid body tensed up behind you.

You both stayed that way, still and quiet for a few minutes, processing everything that had happened and where to continue from there. It was a lot easier and a lot less nerve wracking when you were drunk, but you gathered enough courage to softly press your behind into Wonwoo’s front.

A grunt of surprise escaped his throat and you sucked in your lip, hoping that it wasn’t too late to collect on last night's promises. You pressed back again, this time rolling your hips slightly in encouragement.

“Y-you… you still want…” Wonwoo groaned, his hand instinctively clinging on to your lower waist to pull you closer into him.

“Yes.” You sighed, wiggling slightly as you heard him suck in a sharp breath. “And for fucks sake touch me this time.” 

Wonwoo didn’t need to be told twice, his hand immediately dipped under your sweater, once again exploring your navel, your sternum. An incoherent moan forced its way from your throat when his hand finally cupped your breast, kneading and prodding.

“It fits so perfectly in my hand, doesn’t it?” He gave a soft squeeze, using his index finger to play with your perked nipple. “God what I would give to see them bounce while I pound into you…”

You couldn’t do anything but whine when he moved his mouth to kiss your neck, never once stopping his ministrations on your chest. The feeling of his tongue traveling up to your earlobe then back down to your shoulder was almost enough to make you scream into your pillow, you clung to his bicep desperately as you practically melted into his arms.

You could barely register this was actually happening, hell you would’ve thought you’d been dropped directly into one of your dirty dreams if it weren’t for the fact that his physical presence around you was so strong. His scent, his weight, his voice… God you would have never imagined Wonwoo would be so vocal in bed.

.. Not that you were complaining one bit.

“Speaking of…” He spoke directly into your ear, causing a pool of heat to rise in your lower belly. His hand released your breast, finally exploring lower and dipping beneath your underwear. “Let me see just how fucking wet you get for me baby.”

You were practically panting at this point, and the soft pressure he provided as he prodded your folds almost made you come on the spot. You were getting impatient and he knew it too, proceeding to circle your clit with a deliberate smirk as he moved his hand faster, his eyes observing every detail of your desperate expression.

“Are you gonna look like this when I put my dick in you? God I bet it would just slide right in…” He let out a hollow chuckle as he inserted a single finger, making sure to also put pressure on his palm. You instinctively attempted to grind into it, shivering when he let out a deep groan. “What kind of noises do you make when you come, huh? I wanna hear them all.”

You gasp as his hand picks up its pace and he curls his fingers inward to find the perfect spot. You attempt to ground yourself by gripping the sheets, crying out and pleading for any kind of release from the intense pressure threatening to burst.

“Wonwoo… fuck! Pleaseeee!” You whined out, any leftover teasing in his voice seemed to dissipate at that.

“You’re gonna come on my fingers, then on my face, then on my cock.” He spoke carefully, inserting another digit and causing you to hum out in relief. “Then we’re gonna repeat it, over and over until you’re completely satisfied and your legs can’t even function anymore.”

You were gasping for air, eyes screwed shut as you focused in on the strings in your body tightening enough to snap any godforsaken second. He used his other arm to shift you from your side to your back, his face right above yours as you involuntarily spread your legs even wider to grant him better access. He chuckled darkly.

“You look so fucking good all desperate like this.” He mumbled, slamming his digits into you as he watched your reactions. “Open your eyes. I want you to look at me while I make you come.”

You struggled to focus but eventually your lids fluttered open, finding Wonwoo’s direct eye contact nerve wracking at first but soon realizing how much more intense it made everything feel. His finger curled once more and you arched instinctively, reaching a hand up to grip onto his muscular shoulder as an anchor.

“You like that baby?” He smiled slightly, eyes darkening with every small reaction you let out, you nodded quickly. “When you told me no one’s ever made you come I took that as a challenge, you know?”

You whimpered as he shifted to use his free hand to lift your top, nipples hardening as they made contact with the cold morning air. He took a moment to quietly admire their shape and size, but before you could begin to feel even slightly self conscious Wonwoo had leaned down to take one eagerly into his mouth.

You squeaked in surprise as the pleasure began to overwhelm you, your eyes screwing shut against your will and your mouth forming a giant ‘o’ as Wonwoo flicked his tongue around your breast, nibbling softly all while pressing his palm onto your clit.

“F-fuck!!” You cried out, moving your hand to grip the back of Wonwoo’s hair in encouragement. “Please please pleaseeee!! You’re gonna make me comeee!”

Wonwoo picked up his pace and sucked harder, causing you to scream out as all the sensations combined into a height you’d never even come close to replicating with your own fingers. You tugged Wonwoo’s head back suddenly to pull him off your breast, opting instead to pull him into a sloppy, messy kiss that was all tongue and teeth.

Your breathing staggered and an embarrassingly throaty noise escaped as the pressure finally burst into a feeling of complete euphoria. Your entire body twitched involuntarily and you groaned as Wonwoo pulled away from your lips to watch you ride through the sensation.

His fingers never stopped toying with your clit and his whispers of encouragement kept coming, creating an orgasm that felt more intense than anything you’d ever experienced before.

“That’s it baby, I want you to feel so fucking good, I want you to feel everything.” He muttered softly, not once slowing his fingers' pace. “I’m gonna make it so you feel this good whenever you want. You look so perfect like this, you’re so good for me.”

You whimpered when the stimulation grew too intense, and Wonwoo removed his fingers carefully. He leaned down to kiss you softly, sweetly and your heart fluttered at how gently he placed his hand on the back of your neck to pull you into it.

“Did you feel good?” He asked, pulling back to observe your face, scanning for any sign of regret or hesitation. “Was that okay for you?”

You breathed deeply, body limp with barely any energy remaining but you managed to nod enthusiastically. He chuckled and you immediately leaned in to kiss him once more.

“God, yes.” You murmured into his lips, using both your hands to pull him in deeper. “I could’ve probably come just from you speaking to me like that.”

He laughed heartily into the kiss and your chest warmed as he held you close, as if afraid you’d disappear if he let go. You bit his bottom lip and prodded his mouth open, meeting each other's tongue once more. 

A needy whine escaped your throat when his mouth's pace remained steady against your own,  you decided that he was way too calm for how hard he had just made you cum. He finally let out a deep growl when you gripped the back of his hair tightly and you felt the corners of your lips quirk up into a satisfied smirk.

“I want you to feel good too…” you muttered in an attempt to be sultry, moving your hands down his body to graze his hard length. He groaned loudly, pulling you in tightly as you ushered him on to his back, moving to straddle him.

“I thought I told you.” He grinned and pulled back from the kiss, using his own hand to stop yours from unbuttoning his pants. “This is for you. You already came on my fingers, now I want to taste you.”

You tensed at the idea of Wonwoo putting his mouth on you, a spark of both excitement and nervousness flooding the pit of your stomach in a dangerous mixture. The instant pooling of moisture between your legs was your body’s own indication that it had no qualms with his suggestion, but Wonwoo could sense your hesitation almost immediately and sat up to look at you.

“I hope you know I would never do anything you’re uncomfortable with though, are you okay?” His concerned expression softened your resolve almost immediately, and you nodded your head.

“I’m okay, it’s just… No one’s actually ever done something like that to me, down there…” Your face reddened slightly and Wonwoo’s eyes widened in pure shock. “I'm just worried it might, you know, smell or taste weird or something.”

“So it’s not just that Si-woo was bad at sex, but he never even tried something as simple as that either?” Wonwoo questioned in disbelief, you nodded with an embarrassed chuckle. “… Two years together, and the guy never even thought about eating you out?”

You felt your neck beginning to flush at his reaction. “I asked him if we could try once or twice, but he was kinda grossed out by it. I just gave up on the idea after a while.”

Wonwoo’s jaw went slack in a mixture of horror and incredulity, and you couldn’t help a stray giggle from escaping as he didn’t even hesitate to flip the two of you around. Your back was once again flat against the mattress, and you bit your lip in anticipation as he wasted no time in pulling your sweats down.

“I’ve wanted to do this for three fucking years…” He muttered, his tone giving your arm goosebumps at how deep and serious his voice was. “The amount of times I’ve thought about how you might taste… And that fucker couldn’t even be bothered to— You know what, I’m not going to bring him up right now.”

Wonwoo leaned down to take your mouth in his for a desperate kiss, his tongue circling yours and tingling deeply as if cherishing the closeness and intimacy. He pulled away slowly, trailing his tongue down your cheek to your neck and up to your ear while nipping at your most sensitive spots.

“Right now, all I want is for you to think about how good I’m making you feel,” he whispered, you let out a pathetic whimper as he traced the outline of your soaked panties with his fingertips. “I want you to scream out my name while I fuck you with my tongue.”

He leaned back and pulled up your sweater, taking a moment to blatantly admire your chest once again before diving in to take your left breast into his mouth, his hand palming the other. You squeaked at the sudden stimulation, arching into his wandering tongue as he proceeded to lick lower, and lower.

His kisses peppered along the top of your underwear and you tensed, he looked up at you reassuringly and brushed his lips softly along your inner thighs, squeezing and licking. You held your breath in anticipation but noticed his kisses had softened as if to soothe your very obvious nerves. You held his gaze as he nuzzled his cheek into your thigh, he was very obviously waiting for your approval to proceed any further and all it did was turn you on even more.

“Please…” You whispered, nerves on edge and the heat in your stomach only growing hotter. You wanted him to rip your underwear off already, to finally feel what someone’s mouth would feel like down there. His warm breath grazing against your heat was already exciting you even more, and you held your breath as a teasing grin bloomed on his face.

What you weren’t expecting was Wonwoo to lick you directly over your panties, right where your lips were. Your eyes widened and a guttural groan left your throat without meaning to. The feeling sent an electric shock shooting straight down your spine, and you braced yourself as he teased you, pressing his hot mouth and wet tongue against the already soaked barrier of your underwear.

“Oh… oh my god…” you gasped, shocked that simply feeling his mouth kissing you down there could elicit such a strong reaction from your body. Your mouth was stuck open in silent screams as he finally pushed your underwear to the side and began devouring you without restraint.

You barely even recognized the noises you made as your own, mind going completely blank as your muscles tensed at the vibrations of Wonwoo humming into your pussy. He seemed to be genuinely enjoying himself, lapping up from top to bottom, swirling his tongue and licking up every single crevice like he was a man starved. 

It was an experience you’d never felt anything like before, your skin and blood on fire from the heat his mouth emanated. Every lick stoked a flame that burned hotter and hotter until you were practically chanting his fucking name over and over again.

“Fuckkk, Wonwoooo!!” You cried as his pace slowed down, his desperate slurps turning into long, slow licks right down your slit. The tip of his tongue circled the nub atop your sensitive folds and you were groaning at how you could feel him smirking into your cunt.

“Hmmm.. I love when you say my name~” He mumbled darkly as he continued to flatten his tongue over your folds, chuckling as you blindly reached for the back of his hair to steady yourself. “When you come I want you to scream it out for me, okay baby?”

You nodded exasperatedly, eyes practically rolling into the back of your head when Wonwoo decided to insert a single digit. You cried out as you felt your walls clench around it, the feeling of something filling you almost enough to send you over the edge. His pace quickened, and you swear stars blinded your vision once his tongue began to flick your clit in time with his finger.

If your brain wasn’t currently MIA you might’ve been embarrassed at how quickly he was about to make you come again.

“Pleaseeee, Wonu!“ you opened your eyes to look down and realized he’d been observing you the entire time. You arched helplessly and released a strained moan. “Please I’m so fucking closeeee!”

His speed picked up slightly at your desperate tone, but it was him inserting a second digit along with his tongue lingering a little too long over your clit that sent you finally careening over the edge.

And fuck did you feel weightless.

Your entire body shuddered, your eyes scrunching shut as you felt your orgasm plummet you off a cliff and free falling into the air. Waves of unbridled pleasure crashed through you as Wonwoo continued his ministrations the entire way through it, and you heard in the far distance the sound of your own voice screaming his name out deliriously.

Your eyes opened to a blurry ceiling, your head and body still reeling from the aftermath of bliss you’d just experienced. Wonwoo remained between your legs, peppering soft kisses against your thighs and you couldn’t help the actual audacity this man had to be so talented with his tongue.

“Come up here before I ask you to do that all over again.” You pant out, completely spent and only half serious. Wonwoo smiled giddily and you couldn’t help but smile back.

“You might need to pry me away… Because fuck if I could eat this every day—”

You tugged on his shoulder insistently with an exhausted giggle, and he reluctantly came up to your side to wrap his arms around you. You burrowed your face into his chest with a content sigh, smiling to yourself as you timed your breaths to the sound of his heartbeat.

“Good?” He questioned as if he didn’t already know the answer, you scoffed but nodded anyway.

“Phenomenal, outstanding, unparalleled!“

“Same goes for how you taste~” Wonwoo grinned. “Delicious, exquisite, absolutely delectable—“

“Next time I want to taste you too~” You teased, tracing the outline of his muscles, watching them tense up as you neared his nipple. You looked up as his expression suddenly strained, and you mentally smacked yourself as you noticed his obscene hardness poking into your side.

“Please don’t worry about it.” He shrugged casually, snuggling you further into his chest with a happy cat-like grin. “Close your eyes, let’s enjoy the rest of the morning and sleep in.”

You frowned, you knew he was trying to allow you ample time to rest and recover. Two orgasms back to back was practically unheard of when it came to your sex life after all, and your body was definitely not used to it. But three years of sexual tension was a long time to wait, and you were not about to blue ball him after everything he just did for you.

“I thought you said you were gonna make me come three times?” You questioned boldly, reciting his words from earlier this morning. Your hands trailed down to the top of his sweats and you noticed his jaw clench. “First on your fingers, then your face, then your cock—“

His mouth was back on yours instantly, his fervent kisses already winding you up and sparking a dim heat in your belly once more. You knew it wasn’t likely for you to finish again, but you also knew your body was aching to feel Wonwoo inside you. It was a carnal desire that went past pleasure, you just needed him as connected to you as physically possible.

“We don’t have to, we can just relax if you want instead.” Wonwoo mumbled out as he pulled away from your lips. His eyes were dark and heavy but there was still enough clarity in them to show he was still able to control himself. “I know you’re tired, if this is just for me I don’t want you to feel obligated—“

“I want you.” You interrupt, watching his molten eyes dilate and most of the clarity disappear all too quickly. Your hand reached lower, gripping the hardness of his length through his pants and he inhaled a sharp breath. “I need you inside me. I’ve never needed anything more—“

It was the last confirmation he needed to hear before attacking your lips again, crawling above you while sliding his sweats off easily. You grinned into the kiss and let out a gasp as he prodded your entrance with his finger, swirling your clit with his thumb.

A mewl escaped you as your sensitive bud was played with gently, you released his mouth and he immediately dipped down to flick your nipple with his tongue playfully. He kissed and sucked at your breast until you were careening into him once more, a faint rush of heat pulsing in your core as he slid his finger inside.

“It’s so soft in here.” Wonwoo breathed out, his patience very obviously wearing thin. You shivered at the sound of his voice, knowing that he definitely felt the swell of wetness that came just from hearing him talk. “Are you gonna let me fuck you nice and good, baby?

You cried out at the overbearing stimulation combined with his words, moving your hips in time with his fingers thrusting inside you. He entered another digit and you immediately knew it wasn’t going to be enough.

“Put it in. Fuck!” You groaned as he put a bit more pressure on your still recovering clit. You felt him shuffle with his underwear, kicking it off somewhere that you couldn’t be bothered to think about at this moment. “Put it in me right now. Fuck a condom, I’m on birth control.”

Wonwoo stuttered in his motions and let out a shaky exhale, muttering curses under his breath as he tried to keep his composure at the new information. You needed him raw, you needed to feel every inch of him pounding into you and you needed it immediately.

You relaxed your body when you felt him lining himself up to your entrance, and you both moaned cohesively as he rubbed his tip along your folds to moisten it up. He pushed in softly, slowly, carefully as you felt yourself fill up inch by inch.

He was big. Not too girthy but exquisitely long, and the further he entered you the more you were shocked at how easily your body allowed him to slide right in. You could feel the veins pulsing alongside his length and your walls clamping down around him, effectively keeping him locked in place. The two of you breathed out deeply as he finally bottomed out, and you’d never felt more full in your entire life.

“Oh… fuck! Oh my god…” Wonwoo gasped shakily, his hand gripping your waist so tightly you wouldn’t be surprised if it was bruised in the morning. You groaned as you clung to his shoulders, itching for him to move already. “You’re so fucking tight… I can feel everything…”

“Wonwoo please…” you all but begged, he took one more deep breath and proceeded to thrust downward, resulting in an obscene moan from the both of you. “Please! Fuck meeee!”

Any semblance of self control remaining in Wonwoo seemed to have snapped at that, as he proceeded to drill you into the mattress furiously until you let out the most animalistic groan either of you had ever heard. It did nothing to quell the fervor in which he rammed into you, if anything causing his passion to escalate tenfold.

“Oh yeah? You fucking like that?” He grunted out, the slapping noises of your bodies meeting making you feel lightheaded. “You like when I fuck you like this? Raw and hard?”

You whined out and nodded exasperatedly, gasping as he paused to lift your legs over his shoulders, grabbing you by the waist to lift and pull your body up into his. A strangled cry escaped at the new angle, his length deliciously hitting you right in the sweet spot as he plunged himself into you full force once again. 

“Tell me you fucking want it.” He panted out, a light sheen of sweat forming on his chest and his eyes locked in on where your bodies were connecting, in and out, in and out. “Tell me you want me to fuck you like this over and over again.”

You screamed as he brought his hand down to play with your clit once more, and you found yourself absolutely overwhelmed by the fact that you were yet again on the brink of orgasming for the third time this morning. 

“Pleaseeee Wonwoo, I want you to fuck meeee!” You begged out, your words pitching up with every thrust he gave. His free hand reached down to play with your breast, your other one bouncing liberally as he proceeded to pound into you.

“You look so fucking hot like this…” He muttered, practically to himself which only fueled the ever growing knot in your stomach. “F-fuck!! I’m gonna—“

“Cum in me, pleaseeee fucking fill me up—“ You cried out, and it was the last thing both of you needed to hear before finally climaxing together.

If your last orgasm was like a free fall, this one was like being hit with a freight train. Wonwoo’s thumb on your clit combined with his last full force thrust shoved you over the edge so hard and fast you swear you stopped breathing for a moment. The added feeling of him filling you up simultaneously was so intoxicating that you swore from then on that you would always let him come inside.

Wonwoo collapsed atop you, panting heavily into your shoulder as you stroked his back, equally as breathless. The aftermath of your body spasms calmed down after a few minutes, your simultaneous heaving settling down into long, deep breaths.

Taking a second to gather some energy, you couldn’t help but wince as Wonwoo pulled himself out slowly and slumped to your side. You nuzzled up to him, throwing your weak limbs around his body and practically melting into the mattress. You heard him exhale loudly.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.” Wonwoo murmured tenderly, obviously still dazed and reeling. You let out an airy laugh. 

“And now we have all the time in the world.” A cheesy grin grew on his face at your words as he squeezed you tightly, and you’d never felt more comfortable and safe than you felt in his arms at that moment.

“You’re right.” He smiled, gently stroking the back of your head. He ran his fingers through your hair sweetly, kissing your forehead as your eyes fluttered shut and his last words echoed in the distance. 

“And I’m never letting another second with you go to waste.”

[r3starttt]

FULL MOON

PAIRING: werewolf! reader x abby

SUMMARY: The space grown between you and abby has ignited a primal desire that you can no longer suppress!

CW: abby is a sweetheart in here. mutual fingering. mentions of blood. angsty.

TAGLIST | KINKTOBER: @s4pphic-myth @bilsvlt @tlouloser @marsworlddd @softlikesilk-chiffon @roos4lm4 @elliezlils11utt @1-800-fantasy @roos4lm4 @abbys-muscles | ABBY TAGLIST: @imdrowningindispair @rkivedpages @aouiaa @twopeoplee @wastdstime | as always @clairoscharm, I feel like this sucks.

It wasn’t the first time you managed to survive after a full moon. The last one had come and gone just a few days ago, on the seventeenth. That night still weighed heavy on your mind, but not for the usual reasons. You had left her house for a run, a routine she had suggested months ago to help channel the chaos building up inside you before each transformation. The week had been suffocating—every day a whirlwind of stress—and by the time you had an argument with her, it felt like you were just looking for reasons to escape. You weren’t angry with her, not really, but you didn’t go back that night.

It wasn’t unusual for people to drift away from you during the days leading up to a full moon. Your moods shifted unpredictably, your nerves constantly on edge. The heightened senses made everything sharper, louder, and more unbearable. You became irritable, snappish, the kind of person no one wanted to be around. As much as you tried to remain yourself, there was always that lurking aggression, the impulsiveness you couldn’t quite control. You longed for touch, for someone to ground you with tenderness, but the moment anyone tried, you recoiled, fumbling with excuses about being stressed or "not in the mood." And though you understood your own desperate need for affection, you also understood why others left. Who could blame them? Why would anyone stay when the weeks before a full moon were a minefield, with no freedom to navigate around you without stepping on something volatile? They left because they had no argument to stay, and the thought gnawed at you—were they only here out of obligation or guilt? Maybe they had someone else.

But Abby stayed. She always stayed.

It was Abby who had suggested the running in the first place. She had a way of soothing you without saying much, knowing when to push and when to step back. Running through the woods near your house, or hers, had become a ritual of sorts. The freedom of the outdoors gave you space to let loose that building euphoria, to release the energy that clung to your skin like static. Afterward, you would return to her, your body still buzzing but finally calm enough to accept her touch. Her hands would cradle your flushed, sweaty face, and she’d kiss you softly, grounding you in the safety of her arms. Abby was endlessly gentle, ridiculously understanding, always knowing just how to make you feel like yourself again.

But this past week had been different. The pressure of life itself was suffocating, making your senses more overwhelming than usual. Everything grated at you. Your fangs ached at odd moments, sharp and painful. The smells of the city assaulted your nose, pungent and nauseating, and the sounds were unbearable—every honk, shout, and murmur seemed to scratch at your ears. Seeing Abby helped, sometimes just hearing her voice on the phone at the end of a long day, your body wrapped around a pillow as you tried to wind down. She’d call, and you’d talk until you were too exhausted to stay awake, drifting off somewhere in the middle of your conversation.

But this time, there had been no call. No message, no apology text to smooth over the edges of your argument. The silence was maddening. It gnawed at your thoughts, and the frustration seeped into every part of you. Your nails had grown sharper, and the small scratches you’d given yourself from restless, nightmare-filled sleep weren’t healing. It was a sign you were pushing yourself too hard, teetering dangerously close to the edge. The lack of release, the inability to transform when your body needed it, was making everything worse. The tension had built up over the week, and when the full moon finally came on the seventeenth, the transformation was brutal.

You hadn’t just been burdened by the fight with Abby, though that certainly weighed on you. It was the whole week, the overwhelming need for release, and your fear of losing control. The transformation had been agonizingly slow. Every bone in your body shattered and reformed with excruciating precision. Your muscles stretched and contorted, fur sprouting in patches that itched and burned. It felt like your body was ripping itself apart, piece by piece, and you were powerless to stop it. It reminded you too much of the first time it happened, when the pain was unbearable, and you didn’t know if you’d ever come out the other side whole.

The weight of that night still clung to you, days later, like a bruise that hadn't fully healed. You were restless, nerves frayed, waiting for a sign that things would calm down. But Abby’s silence only stretched longer, a quiet thread pulling tighter with each passing day. It became unbearable, so you found yourself heading to her place without really planning to, hands gripping the steering wheel as if it were the only thing keeping you tethered.

It was late, the moon no longer as brilliant as it had been just a few nights ago. Its dull glow matched the tension gnawing at you—though now it wasn’t just the residual unease from that night. Now, it was Abby herself, and the growing attachment you felt for her. It wasn’t your body craving touch anymore, it was something deeper, something you weren’t sure how to handle. The city streets were eerily quiet, or maybe they’d always been that way, and it was just your mind playing tricks, making everything feel more intense, more suffocating.

The trees started to swallow the road as you drove, their branches encroaching like shadows creeping across the sky. You loosened your white-knuckled grip on the steering wheel just long enough to fumble for your phone. The dim glow of the screen illuminated your face, but it failed to unlock with your face in the darkness, so you cursed under your breath and manually typed the password. Abby’s contact had slipped from the top of your recent calls, and something about that stung. You pressed the call anyway, the green glow of the call screen casting a ghostly light inside the car as you tossed the phone aside and kept driving.

The ringing seemed to go on forever, the vibration rattling in sync with your nerves, until—finally—it stopped. You tried again, and again, until her voice cut through the silence. “Hi, I’m on a run.” Her breathless voice was strained, like she couldn’t quite catch it between her words. You smiled, the relief immediate, like a weight lifting just from hearing her. At least she wasn’t ignoring you entirely. Maybe she wasn’t as angry as you feared.

“Wait,” you blurted before she could hang up, your voice urgent, almost desperate. You could hear her heavy breathing, the rhythmic pounding of her feet against the pavement, the wind rushing past the phone. “I’ll pick you up, yeah?”

There was a pause—just long enough for doubt to creep in—before she finally replied. “Yeah, see you.”

She hung up before you could say more, before you could say the words you’d been holding back for too long. You clenched your jaw, trying to push down the rising tide of thoughts swirling in your head. Why couldn’t you just tell her you loved her? Why did everything feel so tangled?

Abby was running to clear her head, trying to make sense of you, of everything. You’d been so open, so sweet just weeks ago, but now it was like you couldn’t even look her in the eyes. She knew it couldn’t just be stress—there had to be something else you weren’t telling her. The question hung over her: if she pushed you to open up, would it help, or would it only make things worse? Would it drive a wedge deeper, or could it be a turning point?

She wrestled with it as her feet pounded the pavement, her breath coming in sharp bursts. You were stubborn, endearingly so, but right now, she wished more than anything for you to just let go, to trust her, to open up even a little. She didn’t know how to approach you after the fight, didn’t know if you were as lost in your own thoughts as she was. And the terrifying part was the not knowing—if she was wrong about you, about everything between you two, then what?

You tightened your grip on the steering wheel again, heart heavy with the fear that, no matter what you did, nothing would be the same after tonight.

Somewhere amid the chaos of your thoughts, you parked near the large forest park sign. The dim light of the parking lot washed over you as you turned off the engine and slumped back in your seat, glancing at your phone, hoping it might somehow make the minutes pass more quickly or summon her arrival. A familiar discomfort gnawed at your jaw, an anxious tingling in your gums that felt like a warning. You clenched your teeth, trying to make the sensation fade, but only succeeded in biting your inner lips. “Fuck,” you mumbled under your breath.

Restlessness took hold, and you began to bounce your leg, your feet tapping rhythmically against the car floor as your breath quickened and became uneven. You leaned your head back, closing your eyes and counting your breaths until they settled into a steadier rhythm. Just as you felt yourself calming down, a sharp knock on the window broke the spell. It was Abby.

Her face glistened with sweat, baby hairs plastered to her forehead, and her braid tousled from running. She wore your hoodie, the one you had bought to match hers, and your heart twisted at the sight. At least you weren’t breaking up tonight, right? You reached for the lock, fingers trembling slightly as you unlocked the door. It took her a moment to pull her headphones off and open the door before settling into the passenger seat. You turned the engine back on, the familiar hum a small comfort.

“Hey…” you whispered, not quite meeting her gaze.

“Why’re you here?” she asked, her tone flat but not unkind. She was entitled to feel that way, especially after everything. Abby had been endlessly patient with you, while you felt like a storm of confusion and chaos. It stung, even if it shouldn’t have.

“I wanted to talk about… what happened last week. I—”

She interrupted you, shaking her head. “I’m not mad.”

A wave of relief washed over you, bringing with it a warmth only she could provide. “I’m not mad either.” Your voices overlapped, and she nodded, an understanding look in her eyes. "I know."

But then silence enveloped you, thick and heavy. You didn’t know what to say or do, and she looked so beautiful, so kissable, and—“What happened? You were insufferable this time,” her eyebrows drawing together in a gentle prompting for you to open up.

Her hands found yours, and suddenly the air felt thick, as if it was suffocating you. She laughed lightly between her words, her sweetness almost overwhelming you. So why did you feel so attacked? “There’s… I don’t- You know It happens every once in a while, and I can’t control it. Yes, I was insufferable—" all the words you could say turned into a mess, "you’re too sweet to me, and it’s just not fair.” The words spilled out in a jumble, sounding more like a frightened ramble than a coherent explanation.

“Hey, look at me.” Her hand cradled your face, gently guiding your gaze to hers. You did as she asked, but the warmth of her touch sent a rush of heat through you.

“It’s never happened like this. I’m just worried there’s something else you’re not telling me. Maybe I could help.”

You couldn’t reply.

“I love you. And you know that, whatever it is— even if your stubborn ass won’t tell me, I’ll be here for you.” She leaned in, pressing her salty lips against yours in a fleeting kiss, brief but enough to ignite something deep inside you.

“You don’t owe me an explanation, but I’d like to know if there’s a way I can help. Yeah?”

Was that it? Really? Would she truly just… stay?

Her lips captivated you, igniting a wild, selfish hunger within. It was a primal urge that pulled you into a messy kiss—one that Abby adored because it let her hear how much you cherished her. Soft whines slipped through your lips and mingled with hers as you pulled her closer, your hands grasping her body with a desperation that bordered on pain. It felt good, a way for the frantic beating of your heart to distract you from everything else. The edge of the center console dug into your ribs as your noses brushed between the chaotic kisses, fingers gripping whatever they could find.

Abby’s teeth grazed your lips, teasing before they sank in gently. But this time, there was an unsettling itch, a burning sensation that you couldn’t quite identify. “Abby—Babe… abs—” Your fingers pressed against her chest, the pressure almost painful. Instantly, her body leaned back, worry etched on her face. “What’s—”

You interrupted her, flinging the door open in a surge of urgency. “I’ll be right back. I’m sorry.” The door slammed shut behind you, leaving you alone without your phone, your keys—nothing but your racing heart, pounding as if it might burst from your chest.

Abby stared in silence, your figure receding into the darkness, swallowed by the quiet of the forest. Her breath hitched, her glistening lips bitten by her teeth to hold back tears. A whirlwind of thoughts swirled in her mind, all focused on you. After what felt like an eternity, she finally stepped out of the car.

You ran as far as your legs could carry you, the itch intensifying, a fierce burn crawling across your back. You cried out at the sensation, feeling your spine crack and stretch painfully. The muscles in your calves contracted, threatening to cramp. That same burning sensation enveloped your entire body, a mixture of stiffness and tension coursing through you. It felt as if you were morphing into something unrecognizable.

Your teeth shifted, becoming sharper and thicker, while fur began to sprout over your skin. Your once soft and fluffy hair transformed into a wild, chaotic mane. Pain shot through your face as it contorted into a more animalistic form, your whines and whimpers twisting into hisses and growls. And then, a loud bark erupted from your throat, a sound that seemed entirely foreign to you.

Your clothes lay shredded on the floor, a horrifying testament to your true self. You felt a mix of fear and disgust wash over you, unable to comprehend how this had happened. Your heart pounded loudly in your chest, and your senses were on high alert. You could feel her presence, sense her, and even catch the scent of her—a primal hunger rising within you. Despite that, you managed to run further away. You didn’t want to hurt her, nor did you want to be hurt by her.

But her voice lingered in your mind as if she were right next to you. The sweat mingled with the pine-scented soap she used, the lingering alcohol of her perfume still clinging to her skin. You remembered how tender and soft she felt, how you had bitten her before. Your nails had sunk into her skin, a delicious temptation that stirred a craving within you—one that would be too painful to ignore. The urgency only intensified as her name escaped her lips in desperation.

She was searching for you, her ragged breathing driving you wild. The sound of her voice made your hunger grow. Abby was the easiest, most delectable prey you could imagine. Yet, this wasn’t you—not really. You would never fantasize about her blood or her skin.

Time passed as you put distance between yourselves, the darkness deepening around you. Her voice gradually faded, and the primal hunger within you grew restless, seeking someone to satiate it. Your mouth, nails, and teeth had all been preoccupied with a small creature. You looked down at it, flinching as it screamed in pain. Its eyes were dull, devoid of life, the red staining its tiny body stark against its grayish-white skin.

Your feet dragged you onward, and you eventually caught a glimpse of her a few meters away. Horror filled her face as she stared at the remnants of your clothes scattered across the floor. There was no blood, no visible harm that she could see. But if you were hurt, shouldn’t she have heard? The dry leaves crunched beneath her feet, mixing with the sounds of the breeze and distant traffic. The light from her phone illuminated the path ahead, as if she were hoping to spot you or find someone who could help. But all that responded was a low growl, making her heart stop.

You practically ran toward her, not caring or thinking about the gruesome scene before Abby. She had nowhere to escape, no weapons to defend herself with, even if she wanted to. Fear lit up her pretty eyes, bracing for pain, expecting to feel teeth sinking into her skin or a searing pain somewhere in her body. But it wasn’t like that. Instead, she saw the shine of weirdly human eyes. A long, furry figure lurked in the shadows, whining and groaning in pain, red dripping from its mouth.

The growls grew louder, a morbid echo that matched the erratic rhythm of your heartbeat. Her once-white shoes were now caked in dirt, and beads of cold sweat began to form on her brow. You felt the raggedness within you begin to fade, the scene around you blurring as pain overwhelmed your senses. Yet, amid the chaos, you could hear the steady thump of her heart; despite its irregularity, it brought you a sense of security.

The chill of the earth pressed against your body as you lay among the dirt and grass, your hair cascading across your face, swaying in the breeze. You locked eyes with her, and you thought that if anyone were meant to end you, it should have been her. But Abby didn’t flinch; she only took a few cautious steps closer. Her hands raised her phone toward you, illuminating the darkness for a moment before she quickly turned the light off, causing you to glance away from the sudden brightness.

“Baby… what happened?” she murmured, her voice gentle, devoid of the disgust you had braced yourself for. Confusion enveloped you, making it hard to comprehend anything. All you could see were your nails, caked with dirt beneath them, and the raw scratches you had received when you fled. Your body fought against relaxation, reminiscent of the ache that follows a cramp.

Tears slipped from your eyes only when you met her gaze. Though she wouldn’t say it, the disgust was clear on her face. “Hey… hey,” Abby cooed, cupping your face in her hands as she examined you, concern etched across her features as she noticed every scratch. You looked at her, not with fear but with adoration. Even if she were to hurt you, it would be alright because it was her—it was Abby inflicting the pain.

“Go…” you whispered, glancing down between your bodies, even as she held you tightly. “What? No—no, I don’t—” she stammered, clearly at a loss for words for once in her stubborn, intelligent life. “Come here…” Her hand cradled the back of your head, holding you firmly, warm and comforting. “I’m a monster, Abby… please.” You nestled against her neck, inhaling the pine scent you had longed for.

“Is this what happened?” she asked, and you nodded, unwilling to offer any excuses—it wasn’t a choice you had made. “I didn’t want to hurt you.” You lifted your head slightly to look at her. “You bit me, and I felt something… I just didn’t want to hurt you,” you murmured.

“Babe… look at me,” she whispered. “You haven’t hurt me before… why would it be different now?” Her lips pressed against your forehead, her touch filled with understanding. “You looked at me like—”

Your voices intertwined, but hers prevailed. “I saw your clothes.” She gestured toward the torn fabric scattered on the ground, then turned back to you. Your gaze lingered on the remnants, filled with worry. “I was worried you got hurt… that’s all.”

Silence hung heavily between you, her grip steady and reassuring as your body trembled with uncertainty. “I love you��� how cool is it to have a super strong, hairy girlfriend?” she joked, a playful attempt to lighten the moment. You chuckled softly at her words, then pressed a tender kiss to her lips. “I love you too, and I’m sorry,” you replied, leaning in to lay a gentle trail of kisses against her mouth until your body finally succumbed to its exhaustion.

Abby held you close, her hands enveloping your cold skin with a mix of adoration and tenderness. Her warmth was exactly what you craved, grounding you in the midst of your turmoil.

You slid your fingers beneath her sweatpants, just playing with the edge of her boxers. The back of her thighs hit the grass beneath, her hands cupping your ass to guide you over her lap, and you follow. The tips of your fingers leave her pants to caress the soft of her stomach, over her abs. Her smile turns gentle under your touch, breaking the kiss to look at her pretty girl. Your eyes were tainted in yellow, pupils dilated and a blinding shine in them. Thin fur still adorning your skin, purple-like lips, plump and glistening. And your fangs, white tips showing very slightly.

"Let me have you..." the look on your eyes hinted a lost one, wandering over her face until they took control, guiding you to her neck to taint her skin into purple and red. Your tongue sucked and nibbled, just the smallest pressure and your fangs would dig deliciously into her pretty skin. Abby, your Abby, was whimpering.

"So good..." Your words were a murmur, as soothing as your touch. The hoodie on her body clung to your hands with a feral touch, gripping at it to get more of her displayed for you to enjoy and feast. Abby’s hands moved over her own body, taking the hoodie off her body. Her back pressed against the stiff of a massive tree behind her- it looked so from her position. Head tilted to the side, her braid hanging on the same side. Her eyes looked at the dark of the sky, the little starts adorning it with a shine as pretty as the moon. "Fuck- baby..." Her mouth opened in the blink of an eye at the sudden circles over her clit. The pad of her fingers clung to your lower back, cupping your ass with each hand and digging her fingers enough to leave a bruise.

Your lips went back to hers, abandoning her neck for a few minutes. "You're so wet." You murmured in between, devouring her whole as you much needed. "Yeah?" she mocked you back, sliding her fingers in between your pussy, scissoring them from behind. A laugh brushed your lips, contagious. Her smile looked so pretty, eventually getting interrupted to gasp at how good your fingers felt on her clit.

"I really needed you... real, real bad." Your fingers curl inside her pussy with ease, sliding in and out in a slow peace. "Oh- Fuck." The tone is quiet, similar to a gasp for air. It's unsteady and ridiculously delicious to your ears. "Thanks baby.... I love you so much." Your lips kiss the skin of her throat, sensing her quiet guilp. Her fingers interrupt, curling inside you while her other hand cups at your tits, playing with each nipple in a harsh almost painful way.

Abby can feel you smiling on her neck. The vibration of your moans guide her eyes to the back of her head, closing them to just enjoy. You clench around her so good, and your voice? "Fuck baby..."

The palm of her hands slides down on your body, taking in every inch of skin you've got displayed for her to enjoy. Once on your hip bone you get the catch, riding her fingers.

Her moans grow louder, yours become growls and groans. You can hear her wet pussy squeezing your fingers, the feeling "So fucking good baby, so good." Her head nods, digging her fingers into your skin.

The tender freckled skin adorning her now half exposed shoulders slowly grows red. Your nails break into her skin, and for a few seconds your fangs itch to do the same. The sight of her slightly blood covered neck and lips only serves for your stomach to knot. Her fingers feel so good inside you, curling and thrusting with ease at how wet you are.

"Gonna cum for me, Abby? yeah?" The frown on your face turns into a pity curve. She's out of breath, so determined to make you cum at the same time, to have that pretty sight of your teeth showing through your open mouth. To then kiss those plump delicious kiss into a sloppy kiss and end up covered in drool. "Yeah....yeah"

And just like that you please her one final time. Back curved and obscene wet sounds filling the now warmth air between both of your bodies. Your nails fight to not hurt her, ripping the white of her tank top very slightly. "Fuck... baby, please-" she's rambling, pulling you close to her just to hold you.

"Love you, so much." Your lips press over her half scratched skin, a quiet apology and thankfulness for her gentleness towards you. Mostly for fucking you so good and kissing your blood covered lips, for letting you have her.

[moonlight-alexia]

moments like this | s.c.

steph catley x mccabe!reader | 0.8k | 'I never want to forget this moment,' + 'I love how you look at me like I'm the only person in the world,' + 'You look really good in my shirt,'

ˏˋ°•*⁀ this is part of the enchanted to meet you universe. maybe a little suggestive at the end. maybe bc i wrote this at 2am so a little sleep deprived and it probs isnt good but hope you like it!

❆♡────୨ holiday season blurb event ৎ────♡❆

The final whistle sounded throughout the stadium and you instantly turned around. It’s like you instinctively knew where Steph was and ran straight to her. The entire moment was a blur when you picked her up and spun her around. The biggest smiles on your faces. Neither you or your teammates could believe that you – arsenal – had just won the champions league final.

It’d been a long season but all your hard work, all your teammates' hard work had paid off. Your first champions league win and you got to do it alongside your girlfriend, your sister and your friends that you now consider family.

‘I never want to forget this moment,’ You beamed looking at Steph while she held your face in her hands, legs around your waist while you kept her in your arms. 

‘I don’t think we’ll ever forget it baby. We did this together,’ In the moment Steph leaned down and briefly, but firmly, kissed your lips. The two of you were in your own little world, until your sister basically tackled you to the ground in a hug.

‘We’re champions!’ Katie practically yelled into your ear before rolling off of you and Steph. The three of you laid on the pitch staring up just taking it all in. You knew it was definitely going to take you weeks to fully process this.

Eventually you all got up, the big smile permanently etched onto your face. Wrapping your arm around Steph, wanting to be close to her, you both walked around the pitch celebrating with your teammates.

It was ironic that you’d just played Barcelona in the final. Of course you’d seen and gone up to your closest friends afterwards but you really paid no attention to much other than your teammates and Steph and the fact you’d just won the champions league with your favourite person. You were the happiest you’d been since leaving Barcelona. It took a lot for you to reach that point so you were going to celebrate, you definitely weren’t going to notice anything else.

Though Steph noticed the pair of eyes that had followed you both on and off since the final whistle. Meeting Barcelona, it was inevitable it might happen. Steph smirked, ‘Babe, swap shirts with me,’ Steph had leaned in close, her breath against your neck sending shivers down your spine. Steph’s fingers had dipped beneath your shirt, lightly tracing your skin.

You were putty in Steph’s hands. Anything she wanted, you’d give to her. Almost in the middle of the pitch you took off your shirt and swapped it with Steph’s. It meant more to Steph than just trying to annoy your ex and show off that she could and has treated you the way you deserve to be loved. Having your last name on her back and seeing hers on you, all she could do was look at you like it was only the two of you and no one else existed in this moment.

You felt your cheeks heat up when you noticed Steph staring at you, her eyes holding so much love and adoration towards you, ‘I love how you look at me like I’m the only person in the world,’ Your voice was suddenly small as you wrapped your arms around Steph’s waist, bringing her in so you could hide your face in her neck.

When you came to England you really didn’t expect to find a love as pure as the one Steph gave you. Every day you felt incredibly lucky to have someone like Steph by your side and the feeling for Steph was definitely mutual.

‘You’re so cute,’ Steph’s hand gently resting on the back of your head, ‘I’ll never look at you any less,’ 

Before you knew it, you were dragging Steph out of the club and back to where you were staying. Celebrations had gone long into the night and you just wanted to have some time with just the two of you. As soon as you got into your room, closing the door, you had Steph pressed up against it. 

Hands resting on her waist while her arms wrapped around your neck, ‘You look really good in my shirt,’ You rasped out, fingers dancing along the edge of the shirt. Steph loved the reaction you gave whenever she was wearing something of yours, how it made you need to be as close to her as you could get yours.

Steph guided your face towards her, kissing you hard and slow, wanting to take her time. You knew everyone thought otherwise but Steph almost always took control and you were happy to let her have it. 

‘Can’t believe I get to make this permanent,’ You breathed out, eyes closed slightly, while one of your hands traced over your last name on the back of the shirt Steph was wearing.

Steph smirked, a fight neither of you were going to let up on when it came to choosing a last name before you get married, ‘Who said we’re taking your last name?’ 

[concretejunglefm]

A follow up thot to this

Summary: following another night of mutual masturbation, you start to feel the post-orgasm blues settling in a little too long after your fun.

CW: allusions towards mutual masturbation and dirty talk.

Sometimes, there’s a downside to having your best friend know you better than anyone else. For instance, how he can tell that you’re not entirely yourself. Besides the obvious, like avoiding eye contact, you’ve been unusually quiet, which naturally concerns him.

“Do you want to tell me what's wrong?” Noah breaks the silence during dinner, the one that has hung in the air since earlier that day. You raise your gaze briefly to meet his with a soft hum of acknowledgment, and he playfully tilts his head, mocking the sound. “I asked, do you want to tell me what’s wrong?” There’s a hint of snark in his tone, but it’s the kind that’s meant to be playful.

Before you can even think about declining, he stretches out a leg and snakes his foot around the leg of the chair you’re sitting on, pulling you closer to him. His move gives you little chance to resist his invitation to share what’s been troubling you.

“It’s nothing,” you murmur, wiping your fingers on the napkin after meticulously disassembling the burger on your plate.

“Try again,” he replies, his voice flat. He lifts his hand towards your face, a tattooed finger stroking against your jawline before slipping beneath your chin and gently guiding your head to look at him.

“Noah…” you let out a soft breath, closing your eyes and shaking your head.

“What is it? Is it about last night?” At the mere mention of last night, a shiver runs down your spine, and a wave of guilt washes over you.

“It shouldn’t have happened.” You dismiss, as if it hadn’t been mutually enjoyed or agreed upon.

It happened again, where you felt the need to relieve the ache between your thighs. Your mind becoming clouded, making it difficult to discern between what was right and wrong. Completely ignoring the fact that asking your friend to jerk off for your own benefit falls into the latter.

Most of the shame you feel didn’t stem from the act itself, but rather from the way you started to feel like you might be using him. Additionally, in your heightened state of arousal, you began to express your own lewd thoughts alongside his.

Usually, you remained quiet, except for the occasional moan. You enjoyed listening to Noah and the way he sounded, the things he said. However, last night, something unexpected happened. You found yourself rambling your own perverse thoughts, joining Noah in his thoughts.

Neither of you had touched each other, not intimately, except for you, with a hand stoking smoothly across his chest. However, you both found yourselves in a rhythm, where you openly expressed your deepest fantasies for one another. You shared the thoughts you held about your best friend, ones you never imagining sharing with anyone, let alone him while you were at the peak of arousal.

Nothing changed when you descended from the high. Noah gently stroked your arm and kissed your forehead before getting out of bed to clean up. You did the same afterward, then crawled into bed with him. His arm was loose around your waist, and you chose to rest your head on his chest, just like you always did. You heard him fall asleep first, but within minutes of the quiet settling in, you felt the guilt and shame creeping in. This was wrong, and the things you had said to each other, the things you had said to him, they weighed heavily on your conscience. You swallowed, feeling the acidic burn in your throat and shook your head, attempting to push away the sensation and sleep yourself.

Looking at him now, you feel that same acidic burn in your throat. Noah’s hand gently cups your cheek, and you can’t help but feel a sense of unease. He seems to understand you without you even having to say a word. “It’s okay, you know. What we did. What we said.”

So, he did catch what you said, and while he makes your cheeks flush with embarrassment, it also makes your body feel cold with the shame that accompanies it.

“I’ve said some things too, and you don’t see me trying to avoid you.”

He’s not entirely wrong. He never avoids you the day after, but perhaps you never considered any of the things he said to be true because, in your mind, they were merely him embellishing a fantasy for you.

“Don’t feel ashamed,” he leans closer, his thumb gently tracing the curve of your cheek while maintaining eye contact. “Everyone has fantasies and a few inappropriate thoughts.”

“Maybe so, but not everyone has them about their best friend and says them aloud.” You force a laugh, and he chuckles, raising his free hand to his chest.

“I genuinely consider it an honor. Unless, of course, you’re having these fantasies about other men as well.”

You shake your head, convinced that you catch a faint twitch at the corner of his mouth and a glimmer of happiness in his eyes as if he’s delighted to hear this.

“So, you don’t think differently about me?” you ask, your voice small.

“Apart from the fact that you seem to be significantly more perverted than I had anticipated? No.”

You scoff and reach out to slap his chest with a mumbled “asshole,” while he chuckles.

“There she is. Finally, are you done acting like a sinner, ready to be humiliated for having, heaven forbid, healthy sexual fantasies?”

Your shoulders relax, and you nod, giving him your first genuine smile of the day. “Yeah, I believe I am.”

tagged: @fadingangelwisp @deathblacksmoke  @geminigirlfromfinland @fuck1ng-queen @xxkittenkissesxx @lacy1986 @ami--gami @ichoosetenderomens @chey-h @blade-dressed-in-red @bloody-spades @halfalgorithmhafdeity @dominuslunae @tosoundlessdarkistare @xmads-omensx @alwaysfightforwhoyouare @lonelydragonlady @th4t-em0-k1d @amelia-acero

[yaut-jaknowit]

So just finished the wonderful work that is Baby sister and I am here to request a part two of sorts

Was thinking that perhaps before the reader could choose to do a natural birth or not, the readers body chooses for her (probs early) Unfortunately when this process starts while Gawtin is away and by the time she gets there, the pup isnearly born. Gawtin helps deliver the pup and at the end of it all it turns out fine, maybe a few close calls but the both of them get to enjoy this new bundle of joy

- 🥤

Baby Sister Part 2

Pairing: Gawtin x AFAB!Reader

Warnings: semi-descriptive birth (I think that's all...)

Word Count: 6807 (Twevle. Fucking. Pages)

Summary: The pregnancy conitnues one like normal. Or as normal as it can be when it comes to be pregnant with a hybrid. Worries and concerns of the future cloud your vision. While relaxing, you beg for Gawtin to get some of your favorite fruit you were. Oh, how you were going to regret sending her away. Only Qui'oky was at your side.

Author Note: People may wonder why it takes me so long to get to an ask or wrist something... It's because I don't know when to stop. Clearly, I hate myself when I write so damn much. Towards the end, I did slightly rush. Sorry about that but after twelve pages, I just wanted it done. ;(

Part 1

Masterlist

Ao3

Months go on by with little trouble. One you’re more than thankful for. This pregnancy was your first and your last. Nothing could go wrong. Not with a hybrid that no one knew was possible let alone to safe to carry all the way to term. Yet, you believed this was on last gift from Bgwil. One last parting gift before he had joined Cetanu. Paya allowed for this miracle to form.

When Gawtin had helped you with… your problem, that had opened up a pandora’s box. The steady ground you once stood upon cracked underneath your feet. You didn’t know where you stood with Gawtin. Whether this was mutual between two people grieving or if this was true. Did she actually want you?

Surely that night, it felt like it. Since then, you’ve allowed her access to whenever your breasts. They’ve never once felt sore afterwards.

Fourta was a little confused you were producing such a quantity earlier than usual than a human would. Her research had brought nothing to a conclusion officially. Of course, the head medic had theories and ideas. Mainly the fact your belly has grown bigger than the average human. She swore there had to be two babies but the ultrasound brought up nothing. Only one large baby who sat very low. A baby girl.

Her best guess was your body knew the baby was large needed more nutrients. A good sign. Fourta was happy to see this. She had created a serum to boost any nutrients or vitamins you needed. Despite your rocky start with her, you were warming up to the medic. Her main goal was to keep both you and your safe all the way through your pregnancy and even past birth.

This type of kindness you weren’t used to amongst other Yautjas. They are brutal as a species. Hunters, through and through. Fourta was meant to be a medic.

Your hand subconsciously rubbed at your belly was sitting out on the porch. The thatch overhang protected you from the harsh suns that beat down upon Yautja Prime. Added protection against the harsh rays were needed if you stepped out of the house. With the baby, you only seemed to grow more sensitive against their suns.

Gawtin had to buy you UV protective clothing with the use of sun screen. Even then, you still stay under the protection of a tree or awning. Or else, you’ll come home with redden skin. Yet, your body craved to be outside and enjoy the constant fresh air that their wild jungles brought. An open window wasn’t enough. No matter what Gawtin attempted to argue you with about.

Today was no different. The shiny, reflective cream had been slathered head to toe all over your skin. A floppy hat sat upon your head, adding an extra cover. The heat was at an all time today. That left you with a pair of shorts and a tank top. Well, it was more of a crop top since you hadn’t expected your stomach to grow so large. The hem barely even touch the middle of your belly.

A book was in your hand. One that Bgiwl had gotten you a while ago. You’ve read from front to cover plenty of times, over and over again. To the point the spine was barely holding the pages together. It wasn’t from mistreatment but a statement of a well-loved book. You are going to frame it after this last read to forever preserve this gift from him. Hopefully, your child will be able to read it herself.

Besides this book, you’ve read your fair share of Yautja pregnancy norms and the culture around it. They carry for about a month and half longer than humans do. A slow grow to ensure strong, capable babies to survive.

That lead you down a rabbit hole of hybrids. On this side of the jungle biome, the clans and tribes are more lax. They aren’t oppose to hybrids but they aren’t the most accepting. They are consider unpure, not a true Yautja. Which means your daughter will have to fight for her place ten times harder than the average Yautja. Her life will be a struggle, yes. As her mother, you will be at her side till the end.

You shook your head to get rid of the dark thoughts attempting to crawl into your mind. It was hard to deny the fear creeping up inside of you. The fact someone could kill her for just being different. This difference doesn’t harm anyone. But, even before she is born, you know she is strong. She has both you and Bgiwl’s blood running through her. Her heart is mighty.

A presences was sensed. Your head whipped around to find Gawtin leaving through the front door. The giant female lumbered over to you. A wide smile spread across your face as you titled your head back. “Good afternoon, Gawtin,” you greeted and set your book off to the side to give her your full attention.

Gawtin chuffed with a short purr and blinked slowly at you. “How are you feeling? Enjoying the outdoors?” That last part was to tease you about fighting her. She should know not to deny a pregnancy person what they want.

One of your brows quirked up but there was a smile on your face. You filled your lungs with the fresh air. “Actually, yes. I am. It’s wonderful to be out here and relax in the heat.” You stuck your tongue out at her.

The Yautja chuckled deeply. “You’re not going to relent, are you?”

Only one of the corners of your smile quirked up higher. “Never.” Your arms crossed. She sighed and let her shoulders drop. “It was a good try though.” She growled with no intentions at that.

An idea hit you though. For how big your belly has gotten, getting out of chairs or bed had become a hassle. That’s why you looked at Gawtin with a pleading look. She grunted at you to spill it. “Well, you know those fruits I’ve fell in love with. Plus the dipping sauce too.”  Gawtin just nodded her head. “I’m out. Could you go to town and get some for me?”

It was yesterday when the last one was consumed by your hunger. That left you in a teary mood that Gawtin attempted to soothe with other snacks. You thought there was a chance to survive a few days without them, but your mind made it impossible.

Her purple eyes narrowed then flickered down to you expanded belly. The Yautja disliked leaving your side for very long. This trip would take up to a day to head into the neighboring town to get what you desired. That was far longer than Gawtin would ever leave you this close to your estimated due date. Her displeased face was something to go by.

“No,” she firmly denied. Your face twisted into a glare. You struggled to sit up higher but succussed in doing so.

“Excuse me? What do you mean no? I need those. I’m not asking much. I’ll be fine too. I can watch over Qui-oky for you as payment.” Not like you had much to your name let alone coins to pay her back for what she spends on you. You craved for those little fruits that you’re about to go out yourself and get some. A very bad idea, specially for you being pregnant.

The other animals that roam this planet aren’t as civil compared to the Yautjas. You being pregnant would only attract danger straight to you. Your scent a beacon that you were easy prey.

“If you don’t want to go, I’ll go myself,” you threatened and acted like you were going to wiggle your way onto your feet. Gawtin stepped closer and crowded you back into the chair.

She bristled, mandibles clicking against one another. “You are to stay here. Where it is safe for you.” She used a hand to keep you pinned to the chair. Then, a sigh escaped her. Her head bowed with defeat. “I relent. I will go get the aqiual and vix for you.”

A massive smile broke across your features. “Yes! Thank you so much,” you cheered and thrusted both of your arms high above your head. “Thank you.” Finally, your craving could be fulfilled after all this time.

Gawtin huffed and stood back up to her full height then pointed directly at the door. “Inside, now,” she demanded and left no room for an argument to build. Not that you could complain. Not while she was going out to the neighboring town to retrieve what you desired. You looked up at the tall female and extended both of your arms out to her. Only one of her arms were required to lift you up and back to your feet. “Inside.” You kept smiling and waddled into the house.

“I cannot believe you have talked me into this. I should not even leave the house let alone our village for this, this quest,” the green Yautja muttered and grumbled to herself. She stomped around while gathering what she needed for the trip. “Not with you so close to your due date. But you look so helpless when you look at me like that. I cannot say no.”

Deep down, a hidden part of yourself felt slightly guilty for pulling the pregnancy card hard. Yet, it had worked in your favor considerably. You were getting those fruits and dipping. Those mixed together were similar to pickles and peanut butter. Not normal to the average person but pregnancy cravings were hitting you hard. You barely keeping it together at the thought of tasting those again.

“I do greatly appreciate this, Gawtin. A lot. I thought I could last until afterwards but alas, I’m only human after all.” You shrugged then rested a hand on your extremely bloated belly. “I’m sure we’ll be fine. I’ll have Qui’oky to watch over me. Such a sweet boy.” Since he wasn’t running a muck through the house, you speculated he was down for a nap.

A pouch was slipped over her head. The green Yautja spun on her heel and marched up to you. Despite a nagging thought in the back of your head demanding you run, you stayed put. There wasn’t not even a chance she would or could harm you.

Her hand cupped your chin. “If anything and I mean anything happens, even the littlest of pains, you call me immediately. Then, call Fourta. I will be back as soon as possible.” Her palm slid down to your neck, coarse finger tips leaving behind a trail of goosebumps. You shuttered when her limb left your skin. “I will be back.”

The repeat of her words felt more for herself than you. You weren’t nervous. All you wanted was those stupid fruits and dipping. That would make your day better tenfold. Then, you would be happy as a clam.

The last thing Gawtin wanted to do was leave your side for more than was deemed safe. Under her mindset. To leave you while towards the end of your term was dangerous. But your demand for a specific craving forced her hand. Gawtin would make this trip the fastest ever known Yautja.

When Gawtin left you to your own devices, you headed back inside. As promised, you made your way into Gawtin’s room where little Qui’oky napped. His small form set upon a small nest of blankets and pelts his mother gotten him. His chest rising and falling in slow breathes. You smiled and leaned against the door. Your ankles were constantly swollen at this point. There was no break from the ache.

This was to be your life soon. Your hand rested on your belly. A little one just around the corner. You were nervous, of course. But, the excitement bubbling inside of you was hard to deny.

After some research, naming the suckling before its birth is bad. You should wait ten days for the name to form. That’s what this side of the jungle does. To name them before their birth or those ten days can mean the child isn’t meant to survive its chiva. Though, as a human, you didn’t fully believe these… ideas or myths, but you aired on the side of caution. You wanted your child to survive. She was all you had left of Bgiwl. Her death may break you.

Since Oky was still napping away, you waddled your way into the kitchen to feast on something to subdue your hunger. At least until Gawtin get’s back. Your mouth salivated at the thought of those delicious fruits and dipping. Call yourself crazy but that combination was the best thing to walk into your life. The looks you get from other Yautja may say other wise. Though, it’s mostly the males. The females understand a pregnancy craving.

You wanted to go back outside but with it being the hottest part of the day, you feel like you’ve sweated enough. Instead, you lumbered back into the bedroom and mindfully lowered yourself into the bed. The nest of pelts was carefully avoided as you maneuvered yourself to curl towards said pile.

The weight of your belly was mostly off of your spine and aching feet. You could mostly breath normal and took in a deep inhale. Gawtin’s overpowering, intoxicating scent filled your scenes. Your eyes closed on themselves.

Similar to a baby, you needed to take a short nap in the middle of the day. Yautja Prime’s hours were longer than earth’s. If you wanted to be up with Gawtin, a short hour nap was all you needed to survive.

When Oky was down for his nap as well, you would come and join him. He slept longer than you. A short time to have cuddle time with him. Thankfully, he wasn’t a fussy kid when he slept. He knocks out and is out for about two hours. Depends on how hard he’s been playing for the day.

The bowl of dried fruit left at the edge of the concave bed. You pulled the lightest blanket over your legs then finally found the perfect position. Then, you were out like a light.

A gasp tore at your throat. You jolted awake and tried to sit up when lightning struck you deep in the belly. A hoarse cry surpassed your lips. You flopped on your back again and clutched the pelts underneath you tightly.

Movement at your side caught your attention. You turned your head to find Qui’oky stirring awake. He squirmed and whined. You whimpered and struggled to sit up again. The pain tried to knock you flat on your back once more but you powered through.

Wetness between your legs had your jaw dropping. No… You lugged up to your knees and looked between them to find the pelts and your pants darkened. Terror seized your feeble heart. Your head spun around to find where the tablet had been left. Gawtin. Needed to call her. Get her back as soon as possible! You couldn’t do this alone. You didn’t want to birth your child alone!

Qui’oky blinked awake and rolled to sit up. Tears streamed down your face as you looked at him. He chirped happily then tilted his head. “Oh, I’m so glad you’re awake, Oky. I need you to grab the tablet, please.” Your hands lifted to make a writing motion but a strong cramp in your belly had you back on all four. “Fuck!”

It didn’t help your breathing began immediately picking up. Your body shaking.

The small green child wobbled over to you and squeezed your cheeks between his hands. Unfamiliar and baby talk chittered from the toddler. You reached up and held his tiny hand against your cheek harder. “Please, I need the tablet to call your mommy, your bearer.” You prayed to Paya that he understood just a lick of what you wanted from him. “Tablet. Tablet.”

He gave a squeak then clambered out of the concave bed. Hope filled your pounding heart. You used an arm to hug your hurting belly.

Painful cramps worked up the base of your spine. Your toes curling with each one. The sight of the child was lost when you bowed your head and braced for what had to be a contraction. You moved the arm not holding your upper body up to run through the ruins of your bedridden hair. Knots caught on your digits and only frustrated you more.

This… why did this have to be your luck?! The one time you wanted something nice, your plans are ruined by, by your child. Fuck, your child was coming. She was going to make her way into the world today. If she doesn’t kill you on the way out.

Impatience and concern swirled deep in your belly. There wasn’t a second to be wasted. You did your best to ignore the pain and started to crawl out of the bed. Every movement was an uphill battle. Each step forward took a lot out of you. But, you mustered up the strength to get out and crawling towards the open bedroom door.

The pitter-patter of feet stomping their way through the dwelling caught your attention. Your head whipped up to find the stumbling form of Qui’oky making his way towards you. If you weren’t in the amount of pain you were in already, you would’ve cheered outwardly. He came up to and offered the tablet to you with lots of chitters.

“Yes, yes, thank you. God, I love you so much, Oky. I’ll-ow… I’ll tell your mom how much of a good helper you are for me.” You sat down on your calves and took the tablet. The screen lit up, telling the time and day it was. It was quickly dismissed. You moved onto the contacts and instantly tapped on Gawtin’s.

Not even two second later was the call answered. “I’m coming back.” Her voice was airy as she panted.

“Please,” you begged. She instantly knew by the call what it had meant. “Does birthing a child always hurt this much?”

Crunching of leaves and whistling wind sounded from her end. “The first time is always the worst. I will be there. Call Fourta. Let her know I will be there in thirty minutes,” she ordered but left the call open. You silently nodded to yourself, preparing to end the call.

“Okay,” you sniffled and hesitantly ended it. When the quiet of the room flooded back in, you swiftly scrolled through your contacts. Fourta’s was easy to find. You pressed on her contact and listened as it rung.

A couple of rings filled the tense air. “Gawtin,” Fourta’s voice filtered through the speaker. Your hands were shaking badly, trying to hold onto the tablet. Another cramp sent lightning bolts down to your hips. Your gasp echoed back at you. Your name was spoken through the speakers. “Where’s Gawtin? How far along are the contractions?”

“She… she was going to get some food,” you sputtered and had to set down the tablet on the ground. Oky whined and sat down on his haunches to look you in the eye. “I don’t know. It… it hurts a lot. She’s coming back. In thirty minutes.” The green child raised a hand to cup your cheek again. You leaned into the comfort and closed your eyes for a short moment.

On the other end, Fourta cursed with growl. “I told her not to leave you!” You winced and shook your head.

“No, no. It’s my fault. Really. I was in need. Pregnancy cravings. I really, really wanted them.” Stupidly, it was your fault for begging her for those snacks. Or else you wouldn’t be kneeling on the ground, panting and crying from the pain. A pain you’ve never felt before.

A sigh came from the sea green Yautja. “I shall be over in less than five.” The call ended. You whimpered at new silence of room. Oky just watching you. You picked your head up and gnawed on your bottom lip.

“Everything’s going to be fine. It’s okay, Qui’oky,” you soothed him but tried to help yourself through the process. You bowed your head, his hand slipping off. He reached down and tapped on Gawtin’s contact again.

The call didn’t even ring again before she answered. “Did you get to Fourta?” she instantly asks, panting as she pushed her body to the limits. You squeaked out an affirmative. “Good, good.” It seemed like a great weight was lifted off of her shoulders.

Qui’oky squeaked in baby talk. Your face broke with the hint of a smile. “Qui’oky, are you watching over them? Taking care of them?” Gawtin panted then landed down from a great height by the sounds of it.

He chittered to his mother and clapped his hands together. Despite it being baby talk, Gawtin understood what he meant. “That’s such a good boy. Dam’s proud of you.”

“Yeah, he’s been helping. Grabbed the tablet for me,” you groaned and bowed down to press your forehead on the ground besides the device. “Fuck, Gawtin. I don’t know if I can do this. It hurts so much. I-I’m so scared right now. I love the kid… but I need you, please.” You were kicking yourself over and over about the fact you had sent Gawtin away. It was like the world was punishing for such a stupid move. Not that you blamed it. It was your fault she wasn’t here.

Gawtin growled. “Fourta will help. I will be there. Just breath. Take deep breaths in, hold for three seconds, and exhale. It helps with the pain. Are you laying down?” You began to follow her instructions of breathing. It brought down your heartrate and started to ease up the pain cramping in your belly.

“No. Hands and knees.” You got back onto one of your hands while the other tried to soothe the cramp pulling in your right hip. Lying on your back was the worse position to be, that you’ve heard. Squatting or the position you were currently in was the best. But, you didn’t want to give birth yet. Not without Gawtin. You needed her here.

“Good, good position. Stay like that. That will help too,” Gawtin grunted, wood creaked underneath her form. “How far out is Fourta?”

More lightning struck you in your pelvis. You gasped and reared your head back. Qui’oky whined and squished your cheeks between his hands again. It took a moment to gather your thoughts again let alone an answer for Gawtin. “About… about five minutes. Probably less. Hopefully less.” You prayed it was less. You couldn’t bare to be alone with just Qui’oky. There was nothing he could do to relieve your pain.

A hum sounded through the speaker. “I am twenty minutes out,” she said. Had it been ten minutes already? Or was she pushing herself beyond to get to you? No matter what was the answer, you were thankful she was getting here.

You nodded and groaned, eyes slipping shut. Oky chirped and poked one of your cheeks. “Just stay where you are. Fourta will help set up the bath when she gets there.” A squeaked ‘okay’ left your chapped lips.

Gods, this was really happening. If it wasn’t for the pain, you would’ve pinched yourself to make sure you weren’t dreaming.

The front door slid back. Your head whipped to face the sound. Fourta was in the door before it had fully opened. At the sight of the healer, you felt a good portion of the cumbersome weight lift off of your shoulders. She was instantly at your side. Qui’oky chittered to her and patted your head. The healer only hummed to entertain him as she tugged on your wrist.

“Fourta’s here,” you spoke up with relief pooling in your voice.

“Fourta, tell me everything,” Gawtin demanded in voice that left no room for arguing.

Soft fingertips pressed against your pulse point for about thirty seconds. “Heartrate is high. I will need to figure out how far apart the contractions are. Then, I will set up the bathtub. They are in good hands, Gawtin.” Her words helped a little to ease your thundering heart. Your wrist is let go. She stays kneeled at your side though.

“Tell me when you feel a contraction or cramp,” she firmly states. You swallowed down the lump in your throat and timidly nodded. Despite being thankful she was here and you weren’t alone anymore, you desperately wanted Gawtin. She would be much nicer about this than the way Fourta was acting.

As if on cue, your pelvis cramped up and caused you to cry out. “Now!” you shouted. Fourta began to count out loud while her eyes were trained on you. Your hands were curled into fists. You had to bow down and press your forehead against the cool wooden floor. Oky’s palms left your skin.

Another one hit you. Your nails bite harshly into the soft padding of your hands. “Fuck, another,” you cursed and panted heavily. Was the birthing process this painful? Could it be just the fact your baby was massive for your body? The way your belly was incredibly bloated was a great answer to that.

“Five minutes,” Fourta announced then stood up. “I’m going to fill the bath.” You watched as the healer left you on the floor. New tears prickled the corner of your eyes. Fourta was gone from your sight.

“Gawtin?” you croaked and hoped she hadn’t left you to.

“Yes?” she asked, voice airy and light compared to her normal grumble. “I am halfway there. I just passed the pond I have taken to you before.”

Memories flood your mind at the mental image. You’ve nor only been there countless times with her but Bgiwl has taken you there before. Many times. Your last time was three months ago. Before you scent had doubled and could bring in predators for miles. Gawtin deemed it too dangerous for you to go out that far anymore. Not when you already looked nine months pregnant at that point. Running was impossible and you were just waddling around. Sometimes Gawtin would carry around, specially when your feet ached.

“Think she’ll be as strong as Bgiwl?” you whimpered. An added painful pressure forced your legs wider. You needed something to distract you. Even if it was just a little.

“Of course. She will have your courage and bravery as well. An combination of the best of two worlds.” The corners of your mouth quirked up in a short smile.

With your child being a hybrid, you wondered what she would look like. What features of both worlds would make her up? The mandibles? Incredible scent? Hair or tresses? Would she be smaller like a human? That could be an advantage; to fit in smaller places than the average Yautja could.

As a hybrid, there will be difficulties. “She’s not going to be accepted easily,” you muttered with worry full in your voice. That was truth.

“Yes, you are correct. She will have to work twice as hard to prove herself. But, she is of your blood and of Bgiwl’s. You have endured a pregnancy that was likely to fail. That endurance will be passed down to her,” she spoke truthfully.

A few tears dripped down your cheeks. The sweet words making you cry more than the mess you already are.

Two small hands patted the top of your head. You smiled and peered up at Oky. The child was doing his best while not completely understanding the whole the situation with you in pain. But, you were thankful you weren’t entirely by yourself. You couldn’t even fathom the thought being alone while dealing with this.

A pained cry left your lips. Lightning shot through your pelvis. Your forehead was against the floor once more. The cool wood was a comfort.

Once it passed, you asked, “can you tell me abo-ow… about your first pregnancy?” Anything to distract you from the pain and discomfort with Fourta readying the bath. Qui’oky could only do so much in the moment.

“My first pregnancy?” she hummed as if it was a distance memory. That only made you question internally how old was she. She didn’t seem incredibly old compared to some of the elders you’ve seen. “You’re making me go back four hundred and fifty years in memories.” Your jaw slackened. Four hundred and fifty. Four hundred and fifty?!

“It something I won’t forget. Though, she is gone. Cetanu rest her spirt. Her father was the biggest male anyone had seen. A large male from the mountains.” From there, she goes on about her first pregnancy and childbirth. She, too, struggled like you were currently. The pain, something she hadn’t experienced before. Neither was she prepared to feel like she was being ripped into two.

The contractions went on. You suffered through the next three when the front door was nearly bursted through. In came crushing through Gawtin in all of her panting, sweating glory. A thick sheen of moisture stuck to her scales. It dripped off of her. She knelt down at your side in a blink of an eye.

One of her hands lightly rested on your lower, pained back. The other grasped your shoulder. She leaned into frame. A hoarse, crackly purr poured from her throat in a fast pace. Her purple eyes scanned over your sweaty, teary features before straightening back up. “Fourta!” she growled through the small dwelling.

A blue head peered around from the bedroom. “Good, you made it. The bath is almost full. I’ve added some herbs to the water. That will help ease some discomforts,” she explained then walked around the corner, folding her medical pouch back into place.

During the last twenty minutes, she’s only checked up you on twice. For your contractions and heartrate. Then, she would be back in the bathroom.

Gawtin nodded her head then helped you to stand. Rather than letting you stumble your way to the bathroom, she carefully scooped you up into her arms. You could care less about the moisture she just rubbed onto you. You were beyond thankful she had finally made it.

The sight of the massive bathtub filled with semi-purple water was relief. To wash off the horrible mess that had been created when you first woke up from your nap and even to now. You could feel more wetness between your legs not from the fact your water had broken.

With Gawtin’s help, she gently sets you on your own two feet. Your hands are gripping her shoulders tightly. She grasps the hem of your shirt then stops, eyes peering into yours. All you do is give her a slight nod. The green Yautja softly removes both pairs of clothing adorning your form until you’re naked like the day you were born.

Even with Fourta still in the room, you didn’t care she was seeing you naked. There was something worse she’ll see in the upcoming day or hours. Now, it was only a waiting game that your child decides to make an appearance. Gods, it really was happening. You had to remind yourself this was the real deal.

Her large hands guided you to the edge of the warm water. Gawtin slipped in first and stood in front of you, shorter than you now. Both of her hands were held in front of you, palms offered to you. You took a deep breath then carefully used her arms to first sit down then slide into the bath.

The temperature of the water was perfect for your thinner skin. The Yautjas could take on the harsher heat, but Fourta knew exactly what you could and couldn’t handle. Despite her cold exterior at first, she seemed to actually care about your health in the end. You smiled softly at the thought.

A deep, primal groan left your lips as the weight of your pregnant body was eased off tired, strained muscles. Baths were your favorite. There wasn’t much to get you out of a bath later in your pregnancy.

Green arms drew you close to a form you’ve grown familiar with. You tilted your head back to find Gawtin already looking down at you. Another smile graced your features as you nuzzled against her chest. She begun to purr again and rubbed one of her hands up and down your side.

The purring was soothing. The tense, tight muscles that lined your back were the first to relax. Then, you sunk against Gawtin. Letting both the water and her hold you in a softly, comforting embrace.

Your half hooded eyes watched as little Oky waddled in the bathroom with a couple of his toys. Fourta cleared her throat. “I shall be back. They will need a fruy. It will curve the pain some and help relax them for the pushing process.” Fourta gave a nod to the two of you before spinning on her heel and leaving the two of in the tub. You were thankful she had left.

Now, it was just you and your small adoptive family you weaseled your way into. This was going to be the long haul.

Worst of all, your nap had been interrupted. That left you with less energy dealing with giving birth to your child. You were slowly starting to feel the effects seeping into your veins. It dragged you down like molasses. Your head rested against her chest, eyes closing just. For the moment, you just focused on your breathing and Gawtin’s heartbeat strong in your ear.

You weren’t alone. Gawtin was here. Qui’oky was here. Fourta helped you. You had your family here for you. For the first time in a while, you were able to take a deep breath of relief. All you had to do was give birth to a massive child.

A green hand softly caressed your belly. You groaned, toes curling when more cramps fluttered to lift. “Fuck, Gawtin. I don’t know how you’ve done this countless times,” you said and doubled down on focusing on her heartbeat. It thundered in your ears. A powerful war drum.

Laughter bubbled up inside of her, causing her purr to become choppy. “After a point, they practically slip out. Qui’oky was out in two minutes,” she answered and let you float on your back with a little aid. “The water helps wonderfully.” You hummed in agreement and nodded. “Have you thought of names?”

This time, you shook your head. “No, I’m going the traditional route. I’m going to wait the ten days then name her. I may not believe in your gods, but I do respect your culture. I want her to have the best chance at survival. No matter what.” Since living on Yautja Prime, the one-eighty of cultural differences had shocked you. Yes, Yautjas and humans do have similarities, but they also have some things completely wild. Nudeness was a huge change for you. Clothes are worn but they were very… lacking.

Until you found out why when the heat and humidity struck you in the face. The jungle wasn’t even the hottest place on this planet.

She hummed and soothed down your wet hair. “Then, you will have to present her in front of Baroness Ma’tan-Aih.” You tensed. Gawtin’s mother. A force to be reckoned with. You steered far away from the green Yautja as much as possible. She was not nice, not polite, and didn’t take any crap from anyone. She was a brick wall to either talk to or run into. She ran the village you currently stay in and was heavily disgruntled when Bgiwl brought you here, into her home. At that moment you saw her, you thought you were going to die. Either from a heart attack or her snapping your neck.

In the end, she let Bgiwl have you as his mate.

Fear ate at your heart, seeping cold water into your veins. “I-I don’t know. Your mother… she already doesn’t like me. Won’t she… kill my child for being a hybrid?” That hurt to say, pained you worse than the contractions. Yet, it was an honest fear.

Baroness Ma’tan-Aih was the leader of the village. Plus, she was massive. Bigger than Gawtin herself. She commanded. If she didn’t want the child to live simply being a hybrid, she could make the decision. And you… would be unable to stop it. Not even a mother’s strength could fend off a hoard of Yautjas at the baroness’s beck and call.

Clicking growls erupted from Gawtin’s throat. She pulled you in close to her with a gentle but firm hold around your chest. “No, she will not.” The Yautja stopped her growling and released a deep breath. “I see you have done your research about the matter.”

You solemnly nodded. You were one of the lucky humans who has ever met a Yautja and lived let alone to live on their planet. To meet Bgiwl, from this side of jungle, you had to count your lucky stars. Because, if it had been someone say from the mountain region, you would’ve been most likely watch as they killed your child. It is against their code to kill something harmless and defenseless but to let an abomination continue life was worse.

It's considered ‘impure’ to the Yautja bloodline. It could be a threat to all Yautjas. So, to rectify this issue, to put down the newborn. The action is seen as mercy.

“I have. I want to be prepared fully for… today. I’m just really scared,” you whimpered and curled your arms close to your chest. Another contraction ran its course. Gawtin used a hand to pet down your back.

“That is completely understandable,” she rumbled then leaned in close to your ear. “Did you know I was scared the first time I gave birth? It is a natural process, yes. But to birth life is something no one can prepare you for.” Gawtin, the giant goddess looking alien behind you, had been scared when she gave birth the first time?!

With one of her hands splayed just above your breasts, you wiggled your digits between hers. Despite the large size difference, you hold onto the back of her hand. A smile graced your features while looking at your connected hands. “You were probably more prepared than I am. It seems… a more covered subject here than back on earth.” Man, it sounded weird talking like. You never expected to leave the atmosphere of your planet, let alone be so far from it.

Hours pass with only little hiccups. The contractions only grow closer and closer together, signaling the inevitable. Then, you felt the need to push with a pain that had worsen.

Your free hand reaches up behind you to grasp at the back of Gawtin’s neck and hold on. “Gawtin… I-I think it’s time. I feel a need to push,” you whimpered, toes curling while you held back the need. Not until you were told it was okay.

A course palm ran over your belly. “Listen to your body. Let it tell you what to do. It knows what its doing. Just remember to breath as steadily as possible.” Breath. Got that. You can do that.

One more glance over your should up at the green goddess, you closed your eyes focused on tensing your muscles. The pain wasn’t anything you’ve experienced before. It was on a different level, a different scale that sent fire burning in your pelvis and vagina. You screamed out, back arching. Your nails dug into the thick palm of Gawtin’s hand. She acted no different.

Tears stained your cheeks with each push. Your lungs attempted a steady breathing cycle but you would hold your breath before baring down.

“You are doing great,” Gawtin’s whispers into your ear. She was the perfect anchor to the real world. She kept you from floating away into the blazing pain.

There was a sudden pop before you felt the rest slide right out. You gave another hoarse cry, head rolling back for only a moment. Your eyes opened and found a dark red blob floating on its back. Instantly, you scooped the crying child from the water and held her securely to your chest. “Shush, shush. It’s okay, sweetie,” you soothed the sobbing child now in your arms.

Once she quieted down to only a few hiccups, you carefully held her up for Gawtin to see. The giant female purred before it was cut short. Paranoia seized your heart. Your eyes shot to your child, worried Gawtin saw something you couldn’t in your daze, exhausted state.

Gawtin reached behind the child and pulled something into view. A tail?!

[stonedcoldfoxtarot]

Your Next Sexual Encounter (18+)

Pile 1 -> Pile 2

Pile 3 -> Pile 4

Deck Used: Erotic Tarot

Pile 1

WoF, 7oC, AoF, 4oF (rev), 3oS, KnoR, Empress, KoC, 10oF, 4oS, 10oC, 5oS, Hanged Man, QoS, 3oC, KnoF

Pile 1, you might come across someone randomly or unexpectedly, or you could go on a few casual dates through a dating app. Your social life may be buzzing with many choices, but you won't settle for just anyone. It takes more than sweet talk to get you into bed.

You'll be enjoying the dating scene and going out with multiple people, maybe even someone who is grounded and another who is passionate. You'll feel attracted to both of them, but you're holding back until you figure out who you want to commit to exclusively. Both individuals will desire both romantic and physical intimacy with you, and since the empress card appears between these options, I sense that starting a family or the desire for it could play a significant role in your decision-making process in the future.

Once you do make your choice, I feel the sexual encounter between you and your person will be very healing and therapeutic. You will both be recovering from past betrayal or heartbreak that left you feeling closed off to new love. However, once the two of you come together, you will each be able to lay all your cards on the table and ask for what you want both in sex and in love. Because of this, sex between you two will be intensely gratifying and fulfilling. You may decide to try some light kinks such as bondage, handcuffs or unusual positions, but you will both mainly focus on making the other person feel desired and at ease. One or both of you might love to talk dirty and this will drive the other person mad - making it hard for them to go slow or hold back. But in-between those moments, you will talk about the future of your connection and how much you are both ready to take the next step and see how things go. This will be a start to a beautiful long-term relationship.

Channelled Song: Hrs & Hrs by Muni Long

Pile 2

5oF, 6oS, Devil, Justice, 10oC, 3oF, 2oR, Empress, 6oC, Temperance, 4oS, AoF, Star, 6oF, 2oC

Pile 2, if this is someone you had a falling out with or recently split up with, they're coming back to show you how much you mean to them. They want to make things right and see if you guys can still patch things up in the bedroom like before. Despite the way things ended, they still feel that the spark and sexual chemistry between you is incredible. They truly feel that whatever caused the rift in the past will soon be a distant memory once you reignite things in the bedroom.

If either of you has felt ignored or left to deal with a broken heart, this person will go the extra mile to make things right. They will show you through their actions and how they care for your heart that they are ready to reconcile and be the person you need them to be. Once you are aware of their desires, it will make your climax together seem like the start of something new and beautiful.

Afterwards, they will express how much they regret taking you for granted or walking away in the past and will open up about their doubts from before. They see you as the most important person in their life and want it known that when it comes down to choosing between you and anyone else, there is absolutely no competition. After you guys hook up, they want to be with you forever.

Channelled Song: Thinking out Loud by Ed Sheeran

Pile 3

KnoR, WoF, 9oC, KnoF, Hanged Man, PoR, KoR, 2oC, 3oS (rev), 7oC, Death (rev), World

I sense that one of you is slow and methodical while the other is more wild and spontaneous, so there may be somewhat of a challenge to find a pace that works for both of you. However, despite your differences, you both will bond over your mutual desire to explore each other’s deepest sexual desires and naughty kinks.

Here, I see lots of foreplay, dirty talk, sex toys, bondage, mutual masterbation and roleplay. One person may enjoy sitting back and watching the other person dance or your partner might want you to dress up in lingerie and give them a lap dance until they c*m. Once you’re in the bedroom, you will both take turns being in control and bringing the other one to orgasm over and over again, no matter how long it takes.

Pile 3, feel free to express yourselves here without any need for impressing or proving anything to anyone. You will both come to each other as you are, ready to indulge in unbridled pleasure and release. With others, one or both of you may have felt they had to hold back in fear of being judged or laughed at, but with this person, you will be able to explore every fantasy in the comfort of each other’s arms. You will not only feel liberated and unrestricted, but also receive support and care on every level. Some of you may feel hesitant about exploring this connection at first, but there's no need to fear anything other than fear itself. Don't miss out on a wonderful experience that could come your way.

Channelled Song: Sex with Me by Rihanna

Pile 4

Empress (rev), KnoS (rev), 8oS, Lovers, QoS, 3oR, 4oS, 5oR, 6oC,7oF, 4oF, WoF, HM, Justice (rev), AoS, AoF

Pile 4, your next sexual encounter will most likely be with someone from the past. It's possible that you'll reconnect with someone you once deeply loved but had to walk away from because they couldn't commit. You got tired of being the only one putting effort into the relationship, so you withdrew your energy. Now, this person is feeling left out in the cold by you. They used to enjoy all the attention and affection you gave them, but now they realize that their player tactics and tired lies no longer work on you like before. They're finally seeing that you've caught onto their game.

Anyway, this person might suggest going on a vacation or a quick escape together, using the opportunity to mend things between you two. They'll want to share their feelings and set the mood with passionate sex, but you won't be as interested as they are. You'll still have a good time and enjoy yourself sexually, but if they bring up getting back together or taking things further, you will reject them and make it clear that you don't see a future with them anymore. You'll treat them like they deserve to be treated and then move on to the next person who catches your eye. You’ll feel like it’s what they deserve for how they treated you in the past and you won’t gaf how they feel about it now.

Channelled Song: I Hate U by SZA

Thanks for reading🔮✨

© 2023 stonedcoldfoxtarot. All rights reserved. Please do not copy, translate, edit or redistribute.

[agentlizardofowca]

Bubbles!

Human Perry and Heinz watching their favourite star trek/star wars show! Perhaps split into three sections: 1) Heinz and Perry watching it together, 2) Perry with Heinz watching it with Phineas and Ferb, 3) Perry and Heinz trying to get Vanessa to join in on their mutual love for this franchise.

(Hope this wasn't too much to ask. My ao3 if you require it for anything: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SD2006)

@adhd-riddled-crow Thanks for the ask! I made it just one drabble and I chose to use Space Adventure instead of irl IP's. Established relationship Perryshmirtz, Human Perry, fluff! An Introduction to Space Adventure! (1975)

Heinz and Vanessa were supposed to go home after they had dinner with the Flynn-Fletcher family. Instead, Candace and Vanessa disappeared to the top floor to go see her Ducky Momo collection. Perry was sort-of thinking about how to extract the gothy girl, so that they could get home, but then Lawrence asked Heinz about Drusselsteinian clock-making and Perry realized they would not be making it back to Heinz’s apartment anytime soon. He didn’t mind. Not at all. He listened to his brother and his boyfriend happily yap for a solid twenty minutes before he realized he was falling asleep. So, he yawned, stretched, and moved to the couch for a ‘little nap’ Perry Fletcher had taken many ‘little naps’ in his life, and most often he startled awake four hours later despite his intentions to only lay down for ten minutes. This happened often, especially when he still lived with the Flynn-Fletchers, they usually just let him sleep. Not Heinz, Heinz wasn’t afraid to wake him up. Perry’s grumpy and sleepy face didn’t scare him, infact, he kept pointing out how cute it was.

A while later, Perry woke from his light slumber as he felt warmth and movement beside him.

“Sit over here, Ferb. We still fit.” Phineas whispered from the other end of the sofa.

“I believe we’ve grown, Phineas,” Ferb responded calmly. And he sat on Perry’s leg. When the uncle looked over he met Ferb’s apologetic expression.

“Oh, you’re awake, Uncle Perry,” Ferb noted, mostly to point it out to Phineas.

“Oops! Sorry.” Phineas said, looking completely unapologetic. “Do you mind, we want to watch Space Adventure! Dad bought it on dvd, and it has a bunch of bonus features we can watch afterwards.” 

Perry tucked his legs in a little closer and smiled as the kids settled in a little more comfortably to watch the movie. He leaned his head back on the armrest and closed his eyes once more.

“You’re not going to snore through the whole movie, are you?”

Reluctantly, Perry opened his eyes again. 「Just start the movie.」 He signed grumbily and he sat himself vaguely upright. This often -but not always- stopped him from falling back asleep. The movie started with bombastic music and a lot of background information to establish the sci-fi world. At this point all of them have seen this movie so many times that they can just talk through it, which was exactly what Phineas did whilse Ferb and Perry politely listened.

Barely ten minutes into the movie, Heinz and Lawrence popped into the room to ask Perry something. Not even halfway through the question, they notice what movie’s playing. One thing leads to another, and suddenly, Heinz is in the armchair beside Perry, holding his hand, playing with his knuckles and watching along.

Heinz had also seen this movie many, many times. The first time, he was in Drusselstein and the movie was poorly dubbed by just 6 voice actors for the entire movie. “They were all men,” He explained. “So all the women characters had really fake high voices.” 

“A bit like monthly python?” Lawrence asked. “Except they did that on purpose, of course.” 

“I guess so. But the movie was also heavily censored. The first time I saw it in America I was so confused.”

“Hey Dad?” Vanessa’s voice rang out behind them, from the top of the stairs. “It’s getting kinda late…” Just like everybody else, her eyes were distracted by the screen, where Captain Zowt was speaking; an alien commander with red eyes and horns. “What’s this?” She asked as she and Candace made their way down the stairs.

“Are you really watching the space movie again?” Candace asked and turned to Vanessa. “So he’s a corporal for the bad guy, but he’s secretly a spy for the rebellion.” 

“Candace, you’re spoiling the movie,” Ferb interjected with a little frown.

Meanwhile, Vanessa kept her eyes on the screen. “Is he a big part of the movie?” 

“Vanessa, sweety, come sit.” Her father said and he waved her over. “If we all ask for Popcorn there’s no way Linda can say no.” 

“He’s one of the main characters, Vanessa!” Phineas explained cheerfully. “But he doesn’t get as much screen time in this movie as in the sequel.” 

“Wait, so who is he trying to help?” She asked as she settled on a pillow in front of the couch.

“Someone else, please explain! I only pay attention when the pudgilu is on screen.” Candace pointed out with a groan. In her defence, the movie was quite plot-heavy.

“Pudgelu?” Vanessa parrotted, curiously.

“Oh it’s a little space puppy that can fly and it’s SO cute!” Candace explained loudly as she gestured vaguely about the space-pup’s shape and size. “He has really big, cute eyes and he naked little noises!” 

“Candace, he’s not even in this movie, you’re just confusing her now!” Phineas interjected. “Let her catch up first.”

At this point, Lawrence paused the movie. “Can we all agree that we start the movie over so that Vanessa has a fair chance to watch it?”

So, the movie was restarted. It was a herculean task to prevent Candace and Phineas from talking through the entire movie and spoiling all the big twists. But with a lot of soda, a big pile of popcorn and a lot of shushing and stern looks from their uncle, they eventually settled down.

As the end-credits rolled, everybody turned to Vanessa. 

“Did you like it?” 

“So how many movies did you say there were?” She asked instead. “And is Zowt in all of them?” 

“He is, but he’s an old man in some of them.” Phineas explained.

Vanessa turned to Candace. “Like, a hot old man?”

Her friend thought for a moment and shrugged. “Kinda. If you’re into demon aliens with gray hair.” 

On the other end of the couch, Perry was distracted by his boyfriend, who was strangeling his fingers happily. He turned to Heinz, who bounced happily in his seat. “I can’t believe we finally managed to introduce Vanessa to sci-fi!” 

Perry happily patted Heinz’s hand. He was going to try and watch so many movies with her now.

“You should watch the other movies and then tell me if you agree that Zowt and Prince Spohth would be perfect together, I have so much fanfiction to send you!” 

“Wait,” Vanessa turned to Candace with a little frown. “I thought you didn’t care about Space Adventure?” 

“Oh, no I do.” Candace giggled. “I just didn’t want you to think I’m lame if you didn’t like it.” 

“Candace, I still want to be your friend, no matter how lame and weird you are. Ugh.” And she rolled her eyes.

By the time the movie ended, it was way past bedtime for the boys, so the Doofenshmirtzes stayed just a little longer whilst Perry tucked them in and said goodbye. Downstairs, Heinz somehow got sucked into Candace and Vanessa’s conversation, which was all good and well until Vanessa discovered that her father also had a crush on Zowt. 

[luna-writes-stuff]

I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing, Steve Harrington

Song link

Fanfic, fem! reader

Mutual pining, fluff

Word count: 3494

Tw: As a fellow introvert it pains me to tell you you are now going to prom. Sorry. There’s an f-bomb in here. Light cursing?? Idk have you even watched Stranger Things?

Summary: Steve was convinced he was only able to fall in love once, and that one love was Nancy Wheeler. And when all of that fell apart, he met you. He couldn’t explain how or why, but you were simply it for him. Never before had he been anxious to ask a girl out, so why were you so different? And how come Dustin knows more about flirting than he does?

Buy me a coffee/force me to write more

“I could stay awake just to hear you breathing. Watch you smile while you are sleeping. While you're far away and dreaming.”

Steve has only been in love once - Nancy Wheeler. He had told himself this over and over again. He knew what it felt like, he knew what it was like. He knew what the difference was between liking and loving. And the only one he had truly loved was Nancy Wheeler. So, when she started dating Jonathan, his heart crumbled into a million little pieces. For once, he finally understood the girls at his high school who would spend their break wallowing away in bathrooms.

After that, he wouldn’t dare even look at others in a specific way. He was convinced he could only love one person his entire life. He’d never find something real after that. It was a terrifying melodramatic thought in his head that simply refused to leave.

He was at his lowest when he met you.

“I could spend my life in this sweet surrender. I could stay lost in this moment forever. Every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure.”

How you had never caught his eyes, he couldn’t quite believe. For years, you had been in the same English class. Hell, you used to sit directly next to him for a handful of months. He was so blindly and foolishly in love with Nancy, he refused to see anything else for him out there. And where he had once blamed it on loyalty and fidelity, he could now only consider himself as stupid.

You were forced to work on a project together in your senior year, Steve’s final year of torment. He was too late to pair with familiar faces, and was left with the person behind him - you. A lucky coincidence.

It wasn’t anything special at first. You were simply a classmate. But when he failed to show up on agreed study times, or refused to form a normal conversation with you, you showed up at his doorstep. You barely even know him, yet you took the effort to seek him out - initially in pure anger, as this was supposed to be your grade as well, and he was screwing it up, but you afterwards considered this action to have been out of genuine caring. It wouldn’t take an expert to recognize that he had not been true to his prior years persona.

Reluctantly, he had allowed you in, trying to procrastinate as much as he could. You spent the evening properly introducing yourself. You talked about family, work, school, interests, and friends that would later appear to be somewhat mutual (Steve didn’t necessarily consider Jonathan his friend, but he at least knew him on certain terms.) Where you first appeared to be the stuck-up good grades student, he found that you were actually quite interesting to talk with. Even if your interests weren’t always related, he found himself relaxing around you.

“Don't wanna close my eyes. I don't wanna to fall asleep, 'Cause I'd miss you baby. And I don't wanna miss a thing.”

It took two weeks for him to shift slightly around you. He’d grown more comfortable, and had actually tried to put in some effort in your project. After the study dates, he’d treat you to a drink at a nearby snackbar on his way to your home. During classes - if they were shared -, he started seeking you out more. Sometimes, though rare, he’d sit at your table at lunch, ranting about a teacher or a test he just had.

It took two more weeks before he started changing again. To him, it came out of nothing. You had been at his place, discussing what you would be doing the final three weeks of your project, your voice passionate as you explained your plan, your hands following along with your speech enthusiastically. Then, it all clicked for him. There was no special thing you did that made it happen: no faces too nearby, no flirty laugh, no hesitant hug, no brief kiss on his cheek - it was simply you speaking about something you were excited about. And his heart skipped a beat at it. The feeling you’d get just before you go down a rollercoaster, or when your chair almost falls backwards - but then in a good way.

The last time he felt that was when Nancy winked at him from across the room. And that was last year. He knew the feeling, and it did not take him longer than a second to figure out what it was. He didn’t dare to say it, though. He might say the wrong thing, or do the wrong thing and something about that made him so scared. He’d never felt anxious to walk up to someone and simply confess how he felt. It came easy to him.

Not after that one stupid rant you did.

“'Cause even when I dream of you The sweetest dream would never do, I'd still miss you baby. And I don't wanna miss a thing.”

He wouldn’t speak of it to anyone. He hadn’t even told himself out loud yet. He told himself that if he’d speak it, it might disappear, or bring him bad luck. He cursed himself afterwards and scolded his mind for suddenly picking up superstition.

He’d try so badly to behave somewhat normal around you, and not as if his heart was beating way too quickly whenever you spoke his name or nudged his shoulder with your pen. In his eyes, he was doing a great job at it. He didn’t stutter once, nor did he forget his words. He didn’t sweat, didn’t act on emotion. He was completely nailing this.

He never noticed his staring. You had.

“Lying close to you, feeling your heart beating. And I'm wondering what you're dreaming. Wondering if it's me you're seeing.”

You had noticed it only a day after Steve’s realisation. Sure, he had shown interest in you, but they never included prolonged eye contact, nor the feeling of being watched over during classes. It was uncomfortable when it first started, but when he failed to do anything about the staring in a negative sense, you figured his mind had just been too preoccupied with other things and let it slide.

But every time you’d walk the halls, you swear Steve kept his eyes on you even after you had greeted him at the lockers. During breaks, he would constantly be throwing you looks, and you had to pretend to look at something else to not be creepy as well. He started walking you to your car, helping you carry school books, and saving you lunch.

You might not have been the smartest, but you weren’t oblivious. He didn’t do this for his other friends - which he had known way longer than he had known you. He wouldn’t even walk his ‘children’ friends outside school. And you might have understood him if he had done so. But he didn’t. Not with anyone except you.

But maybe you were thinking too much of it.

“Then I kiss your eyes And thank God we're together. And I just wanna stay with you in this moment forever. Forever and ever.”

“Steve,” Dustin urged. “Earth to Steve.” The boy in question only grunted in annoyance, reluctantly tearing his eyes from you and your friend group. “Dude, this is almost becoming creepy.” Dustin continued. “Just talk to her. You’re friends, right?” “Yes, Dustin,” Steve groaned. “We’re friends.” An aloud confirmation. To himself and to Dustin. You were just friends, sure.

“Friends don’t really stare at each other the entire time.” Rolling his eyes, Steve shook his head at the boy, giving him a pointed look. “I’m not looking at her the entire time.” “Maybe not, but when you’re not looking, she is.” That made his head spin around too fast, his eyes briefly meeting yours before they cast back to your friends.

“That’s totally normal,” Dustin emphasised. “Me and Mike make love-sick eyes at each other the entire time.” “Will you shut it?” Steve hissed, his face warm as he tried to look at the wall behind you. “I would, but all of this staring is making me sick.” “No one asked you to look.” “It’s impossible not to.”

“I don't wanna close my eyes. I don't wanna to fall asleep, 'Cause I'd miss you baby. And I don't wanna miss a thing.”

“She’s totally into you, you know that right?” Dustin prodded. “Shut up.” “No, I’m serious, man. She’s my babysitter and she talks about you all the time.” He exaggerated, a notion Steve was quick to catch onto, giving the younger boy an accusing look. “Okay, so, maybe I am the one who brings you up, but she is the one who starts laughing and talking all about how funny you are.” He defended, holding his hands up as he shrugged. And with those words, Steve was left speechless for just a short second.

“If you ask her out to prom, I can guarantee you, she’ll say yes.” Dustin hinted. “You’ll have the perfect ambiance - lights, music, clothes, and amazing company.” “Dude, you’re twelve.” Steve deadpanned, yet curiously thinking Dustin’s offer over. “I’m thirteen.” “Big difference.”

“If this is what growing up is like, I don’t want any part of it.” “No,” Steve finally agreed. “Trust me; you don’t.”

“Dude, you’re the king of Hawkins High,” Dustin tried to convince. “If you can’t ask a girl out, what are my chances?” Steve formed his lips in a thin line upon the words, shrugging aimlessly. Dustin’s hands found Steve’s biceps, clutching them tightly, taking him by surprise. “Give me hope, Steve.”

“Geez, man,” Steve muttered confused. “It’s not the end of the world.” “You’re right: it isn’t.” Dustin agreed, a sudden smile on his face. “So, talk to her.” Then, he turned the older boy around, forcing his eyes to suddenly fall on yours. Again, his face heated up at the contact, his eyes back on the wall behind you before yours could fall to the floor in a flustered mess.

“'Cause even when I dream of you The sweetest dream will never do, I'd still miss you baby. And I don't wanna miss a thing.”

He wanted to back away, let the weird thirteen-year-old he met last year down and swallow his pride to the depth of his stomach, but one of your friends had already noticed him, sparing him a wave before taking off with the rest of the group, leaving only you there. If he couldn’t even ask you when you were alone, what dignity did he have left?

And thus, with courage he did not know he had to muster up, he walked towards you, his heart wildly beating, screaming at him to turn around and hide while he still could. Stupid. That never happened before. It was scary - he hated it. Weak for a talk.

“You didn’t mention a little brother,” You began, trying to start a conversation as your eyes fell on Dustin, who had - not so casually - started paying a lot of attention to his shoes. Chuckling awkwardly, Steve shook his head. “No, he’s not my brother.” “Cousin?” “Weird kid that started following me around last year.” A quiet ‘ah’ of understanding escaped you as you nodded hesitantly. “Must have been quite the conversation you were having.” “You really don't want to know.” You laughed at this.

Stupid. Stupid heart skipping that stupid beat at your stupid smile.

“I don't wanna miss one smile. And I don't wanna miss one kiss. And I just wanna be with you Right here with you, just like this.”

Then, the silence came. You hadn’t shared those yet. You always had a lot to say, and if not, he would. But this was an uncomfortable silence. Granted, he had known you for five weeks, but he did not like this one bit. He felt as if he had gotten to know you better in five weeks than he had his other friends in four years. He didn’t even know if Tommy had a brother or a sister - or maybe it was both. He knew your entire family, though.

Dustin was right. That wasn’t normal for friends. Or at least - not for his versions of friends. He was interested in them, but not as much as he was in you. And that wasn’t just because you were generally pleasing to look at. It was important to him, though.

“Um, pretty,” Steve mumbled, not even realising what he had said. An unconscious notion of himself as he tried to fill the silence. It even startled him, his heart sinking slightly as he tried to cover it up. “Prom.”

Yes, there was no going back now.

“And I just wanna hold you close. I feel your heart so close to mine. And just stay here in this moment For all the rest of time.”

“Prom.” You nodded at him as he repeated his words. “Next month.” You reminded him, thinking he didn’t know the date. “Right, yes,” Steve agreed, grateful you hadn’t taken up his slip. “Do you plan on going?” You thought of it for a while. In truth, you had meant to be going with a friend, but she cancelled last week, claiming she’d rather take another friend who would be in town that week. You understood her - you might have done the same. But you weren’t going to show up to prom alone. Besides, staying home wouldn’t be the worst idea. Cinemas would likely be very empty that night. You might spend your evening there.

“I don’t think so.” You finally settled on. “Not?” “I was gonna go with a friend, but she cancelled.” “That’s lame, I’m sorry.” Steve tried to offer in sympathy, but you shook him off. “No, I don’t blame her. One of her long-distance friends will be in town, and she’d rather take her.” “Still,” Steve continued. “That must have sucked.” You lightly shook your head at him, a tiny grin on your face. “Yes, but it’s okay. I don’t hate her for it.”

Another silence. This time due to both of you thinking over your words. Stupid. He never had to do that before.

“Why?” You prodded playfully. “Planning to ask me yourself, Harrington?”

Yet again, his heart skipped a beat. Stupid.

“Don't wanna close my eyes. Don't wanna fall asleep, 'Cause I'd miss you baby. And I don't wanna miss a thing.”

“Only out of pity.” He covered up quickly, his eyes not deviating from yours once. “I’m the worst pity party.” You joked, to which he faintly found himself sparing a laugh. “I’d be happy to join it.” “Yeah, you would.” You replied sarcastically, nodding your head in humour.

A third beat of silence. Now, the pounding in his heart was begging for some action. One more silence and he might spontaneously combust. “What if I was?” He mustered out, his eyes falling back on the wall behind you. Looking behind you to see what he was looking at, you frowned lightly, forcing your eyes back to his face. “What if you were what?” “Planning to ask you to prom?” A deep falling of his heart. Stupid.

“I’d ask why you didn’t ask future prom queen Heather.” You replied after a handful of seconds, not sure how to respond to him. You’d be lying if you said your heart wasn’t copying his exact movements. “Because she’s fake.” He stated easily, causing you to gasp lightly, looking around to check if others were around. “Steve,” You scolded. “I’m serious,” He disclosed honestly. “She always pretends to feel bad for others, but she’s as much of a bully as she is narcissistic.”

You could join him and rant about this girl, but in truth, you barely even knew her. Part of it made you feel guilty. Thankfully, Steve caught on quickly: “Besides, I already rejected her.”

“'Cause even when I dream of you The sweetest dream would never do. I'd still miss you baby. And I don't wanna miss a thing.”

Mouth slacked open, you looked at him in surprise. Again, you didn’t really know the girl, but you knew her enough to be aware of her reputation. Or, more importantly, her looks. “You rejected Heather?” You asked confused, a feather light feeling entering your stomach. “Yeah, well, I’m not really one for dances, but I could make an exception.” Steve defended, trying to play it off cool. His exterior was doing a great job at it. Inside, whatsoever, it was pure rampage. His brain was scavenging for the right words or actions. He truly didn’t want to screw this up, but he had never felt this anxious around a person. If this would not be the moment, he didn’t know if it would ever come again.

Luckily, you did not notice the turmoil, and responded to his words before he could make a fool out of himself. “You’d make an exception for your study buddy?” You tested, still unsure whether he was joking or not. If he was, it was a cruel one. “You need those grades, don’t you?” “No.” He denied quickly, almost instantly. “I’d make an exception for a good friend. And all I need is just a little bit of your time.” “For what?” You asked, raising your eyebrows slightly.

Holding you, you idiot. Keeping you close, not tearing my eyes from you if I can help it. Maybe a little kiss here and there, light touches on your waist, repressing those stupid beats of my heart.

Instead, what came out was: “Dancing, duh.”

“I don't wanna close my eyes. I don't wanna fall asleep, 'Cause I'd miss you baby. And I don't wanna miss a thing.”

“I don’t have an outfit.” You avoided, slightly taken aback by his cool behaviour. Sure, you had learned his humour, but you would be lying if you said you weren’t expecting him to show just a little emotion and a positive response to your slightly high hopes. Then, he said something that truly took you aback.

“Wear this. You look beautiful in this too.” It was out before he could even stop it. He hadn’t even realised his brain had been forming these words. They just stumbled out. And when you went slack at them, he wanted nothing more than to dig his head into the nearest wall. “I’m-“ He tried to salvage, desperately stumbling over his words.

Stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. This was exactly what he had been avoiding all this time and now his speech was failing him.

“I’m sorry, that was-“ No words managed to follow up that trail of thought, leaving you there, still wide-eyed. “Fuck.” He silently mumbled to himself, before just running with what he had slipped out. “You look perfect just like this.”

“Thank you.” You nearly whispered, your heart surely in your throat now. This was precisely what you wanted to hear, so why did you not know how to respond to it.

“Yeah, no problem.” Steve sighed helplessly.

“'Cause even when I dream of you The sweetest dream would never do, I'd still miss you baby. And I don't wanna miss a thing.”

“So, prom? With me?” He swallowed his dignity, saying his words as he had always meant them. No de-tours now. And at that, your courage began to build up again. “As friends?” You tested. “Maybe,” Steve answered. “Or, maybe, as a date.” A sigh of relief swept through you, the action not going unnoticed by Steve. He did not mention it however.

“It’ll be a hell of a first date.” You muttered, your happiness doing its best containing itself. “It doesn’t have to be.” Steve dismissed. Your hopes fell to the floor at that, afraid you had gotten ahead of yourself. Hadn’t he said it aloud? Hadn’t he proposed it had been a date?

“I heard the cinema is playing Gremlins tonight.” He interrupted your train of thought, a slight smile on his face. You copied it nearly immediately, more relief flooding your senses. And then, a sudden burst of confidence: “You know the purpose of the cinema is watching movies, right? Not me.” Hissing and nodding at your hint, his shoulders fell slightly. “Am I that creepy?” “At first, yes,” You admit honestly. “But it’s cute.”

Cute. Stupid.

“What time?” Having remembered the exact time for this perfect scenario, Steve perked up slightly. “Eight.” “Pick me up at seven-thirty,” You proposed. “You know where I live.” Then, you turned around, ready to head to your next classes. You spared him a light wave, before moving towards the halls. His eyes followed you until you were out of sight.

That stupid smile. Those stupid eyes. Your stupid voice. Your stupid humour.

You were going to be the death of him.

“Don't wanna close my eyes. I don't wanna fall asleep, And I don't wanna miss a thing.”

[freshxsturniolo]

This might be a mouth full but can you do one where Matt o(or Chris)and y/n are in a relationship but they had some time apart and in that time Matt (or Chris) saw someone else and they go to mutuals party she’s there but y/n has no idea they hooked up and when she pieces it together she gets upset that he never told her and etc.

HEY BABY this was so fun to write. i hope this is okay <3 (i did matt hehe)

your relationship with matt in the first year had been far from perfect. you were the absolute definition of right person, wrong time. his YouTube career was at its peak, subscribers climbing higher and higher each week, and it was difficult for you both to juggle such a change to his life, plus your own life with your own commits, and your relationship.

when you both came to the decision to take a break for a while, your heart had broke. you had both cried and spent the day in his room, cuddled together on his bed watching your favourite tv shows, promising to always love each other no matter what happened.

you spent 6 months watching him rise and rise, whilst your own career took off better than ever. you were heartbroken but you had hope. you had faith that together one day you would be together again. you had said it was nothing more than a break, knowing your love for each other would bond together again one day. but over the course of those months you both become so busy, it had almost seemed unlikely. you had somehow learned to live a life without matt sturniolo, watching from the shadows of his life.

texts become the odd instagram dm, before becoming nothing more than the odd instagram like. but you were happy. you could tell he was living his life, he looked happier and healthier than had ever done before and that was enough for you.

"we love each other no matter what happens, okay?" his words to you that final night 6 months prior. and you did.

but when you woke up one january morning to a missed call, your heart had been in your throat. it had come early, around 6am, but in your deep slumber you hadn't heard it. there was no follow up. there was no text afterwards. you even checked on instagram and there had been no DM. you had almost convinced yourself it was accidental, but there was something in your heart pulling you to him.

so you called, and he answered on the first ring. you grabbed coffee together an hour later, and that night, you were back at his house, watching movies with him and his two brothers like nothing had ever happened.

"i never stopped loving you, you know" he had said, and you had smiled as you finally leant in to kiss his soft lips.

"me either, matt. we said we never would."

he smiled. "i know"

and suddenly, everything worked out. the time apart had been perfect, you couldn't deny it. as heartbroken as you had been at the time. you had learned to live without him but the minute you was in his presence again, you knew you never actually wanted to live without him.

and matt felt the same. he knew that the lack of contact was his own fault. he had been the one to stop replying to your texts, the one to stop replying to your instagram stories, but he had never stopped thinking about you. his brothers had told him he was stupid, but he knew he wasn't. the 6 months break was needed. and when he woke up that one january morning, and he woke up and did his daily scan of your social media outlets, he knew it was time. he knew he needed you back in his life.

to now, 5 months later, watching you apply the last touch of your make up in the mirror of his bathroom whilst he came out of his bedroom, looking at you with a smile.

"you ready?" he asked, and you looked at him through the mirror.

"beyond ready, i need a drink" you said, walking over to him and wrapping your arms around his neck. his arms snaked around your lower back and he leant in to give you a soft kiss.

"you two are too lovey dovey for me" you heard chris remark from the kitchen, and you had rolled your eyes with a laugh, pulling away.

"try talking to a girl for more than one second" matt had said, and you turned around to slap his arm. these boys could be so cruel to each other, but you knew it was all in love.

"come on, we're already late" nick had said from somewhere you couldn't see until you heard his feet down the stairs, chris following not far behind.

and an hour later, you where leant against the kitchen in your friends new house, chatting to a few of your girlfriends. you were celebrating her new career move and her new house and you were beaming with pride at how all of your lives were working out. your friends were happy, you were happy, your boyfriend was happy. life couldn't have worked out better.

"so," your friend said, coming to the side of you. "you and matt are okay, right?"

you smiled at her, swallowing down your drink.

"better than ever. the break really did us good" you said, and she smiled.

"im so glad."

and as if right on queue, he appeared.

"hey, babe" he said, walking over and planting a kiss on your lips.

"hey, baby" you smiled in return.

he moved to the side of you, reaching around to grab a fresh drink.

"you having fun?" he asked, but you didn't get chance to reply before his name was squealed from somewhere across the room. both of your heads snapped around, and it didn't take more than a second to see the beaming smile of some girl you'd never seen. you knew your friend had a whole group of friends you didn't know, you'd been passing polite hellos across the last hour, but this girl you had never seen before.

"oh, fuck." you heard matt utter under his breath, and your head snapped away from the gorgeous girl walking towards you and towards your boyfriend. you noticed the way his face had turned weary.

"who's that?" you whispered, and he looked at you for a millisecond before the girl was in front of you.

she was taller than you, her hair placed in a blonde bun on top of her head, and she was gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous. you didn't even notice you'd straightened your position and pouted your lips slightly.

her arms immediately went around matts neck, and you stood at the side of him as you watched him wrap his arms loosely around her back.

"hey" he muttered as they pulled away.

"i haven't seen you in so long" she beamed up at him, before her eyes finally diverted in your direction. "oh, hey!" she said, and you smiled.

"this is y/n" he said, and you saw from the corner of your eye that he was looking at you as he said it. but you kept your eyes on this stunning blonde, watching as her eyes widen slightly. and then she lunges forward to hug you, her perfume strong against your nose.

"i've heard so much about you!" she exclaims. you can't help but hug her back.

"you have?" you say with a laugh, your eyes finally meeting matts against the hug. when she pulls away, you notice the way his eyes go straight to her.

"so much! so," she says, taking a step back. "you guys are back together?"

"yeah" matt answers immediately, his hand finding yours.

"ah, im happy for you both!" she beams. "that explains the quietness, matt" she laughs, and your heart stops.

you look down at matts hand in yours, the sudden need to be close to you, and her words, and suddenly you feel sick.

the blonde reaches behind matt to the row of drinks behind you, and when her eyes are diverted else where you give matt a look, he smiles. but it doesn't reach his eyes like it normally does. when she finally pulls back, drink in hand, she looks between you both awkwardly. matt still hasn’t responded to her previous remark.

you put on a smile before pulling your hand away from matt.

“well, i’ll leave you both to catch up” you say, diverting your eyes to the girl who you hadn’t even asked her name, before you turn on your heel.

“babe” he starts, but you turn around quickly.

“matt,” you say. and he knows. he knows not to follow you.

you look back to the girl. “lovely to meet you”

“you too” she says, but you’ve walked away before you even see her face.

you can’t be upset. you can’t. but god it was so fucking obvious. her excited squeal, the look on her face when he said your name, it was so fucking obvious and you can’t help the tears that have brimmed in your eyes.

but you’re startled by a familiar face walking around the corner, slamming yourself against his chest.

“woooo easy tiger” chris says, and you look up at him as the first tear falls. “oh, fuck. what’s happened?”

but his eyes divert behind you and you see the way his eyes widen. it’s all the confirmation you need.

“did he sleep with her?” you ask, taking a deep breath. you could not cry on your boyfriends brothers shoulder.

“it’s not my place-“

you laugh. “so yes”

“it was only a handful of times”

“a HANDFUL?” you shout, and chris’ eyes widen as he pulls you backwards, out of the view of the kitchen and into the hallway he’d just emerged from. “a fucking handful, chris?”

“i’m not sure, alright? you should speak to matt about it”

you knew he was right. you were putting him on the spot and that wasn’t fair.

“can i chill with you, for a minute?” you ask, the anger surging through you almost unbearable.

“yes, come on” he says, and he takes your wrists and drags you in the direction of some of his friends.

they shout your name when they see you, and you put on a brave face, but the atmosphere is ruined. it’s not that you could even be mad. jesus, you weren’t together. but it was the not knowing. it was the fact he hadn’t told you. you had spent months learning to live a life without him and he’d spent it buried up in some other girl.

“he loves you, you know” chris said randomly an hour later. you’d been glued it his side the entire time, and listening to him yap to his friends had kept you from spiralling. the blonde and matt had not entered your line of sight once.

you look up at him with a smile. “i know” you whisper, and he gives you a one arm hug, pulling you into his side. “go and talk to him, please.”

and you knew you had to. because you weren’t having fun, and you needed to hear it from him.

so you stand up, leaving chris to his friends and make your way into the kitchen. your eyes scan but matts no where to be seen, and you let out a sigh as you head towards to garden. it’s louder out here, people are so clearly drunk and there’s more and more people you don’t recognise now, but you hear a familiar laugh from the right side of you and you turn to see nick, and just to his side is matt, picking off the label of his drink. but it only takes him a few seconds before his eyes are on yours, his back straightening immediately before his drink is placed on the table and he stands, heading straight towards you. you can feel the tears forming immediately.

“where have you been?” he asks when he reaches you, his voice mellow.

“with chris” you admit, but you can’t stop the crack in your voice.

“baby-“

“why didn’t you tell me, matt?”

“i’m so - i’m sorry. it didn’t seem relevant”

you scoff. “of course it’s relevant, matt. of course it is”

“it was nothing. i promise it was nothing. i missed you every single day, alright? every single fucking second. but you were thriving, babe. i saw it all over your instagram, you were thriving and it would have been selfish of me to ask you back so soon”

you sigh, looking up at the sky. the sun was still bright but it was nearing evening time.

“how long after we ended it?” you ask. you needed to know.

“3 months” he admits.

“and how long for?” you ask. you shouldn’t care. it doesn’t matter. “actually, don’t answer that. i don’t need to know”

matt smiles slightly. “i should have told you. i’m sorry. i just didn’t want to lose you before i’d even got you back” he says, and your heart swells.

“we promised to love each other always, matt.”

“i know, baby. and i do. so much.” he grabs your face in between his hands now, and you can’t help but let out a smile.

“i’m sorry” you whisper, and his face screws in confusion.

“for getting mad. what you did in those 6 months shouldn’t matter. but-“

“it’s okay” he cuts you off. “it’s totally okay. i should have told you.”

and then he kisses you, softly, like he doesn’t know what your reaction will be, but you lean in to kiss him back.

“can we go home?” you ask, suddenly feeling drained and out of social battery.

“i was about to ask you the same thing.”

and so he drove you both home, his hand on your thigh the entire time as he drove, a comfortable silence washing over you. but when you pull up, you need to ask him one more thing before you get let the situation drop.

“matt” you start, and he turns to you. “you said it would have been selfish to ask me back so soon.”

his eyes look over you, but you continue. “is that why you stopped contact? so that you wouldn’t?”

he sighs, twisting his position to look out the front of his car. and he thinks for a while. i can see him trying to figure out what to say. and then he turns to look at you again.

“yes. it was so hard for me. chris and nick kept telling me i was stupid, that you loved me and that you would have supported me no matter what we went through. but i knew that the break would have made us stronger. and then i saw you thriving y/n, you were telling me all these amazing things and i just couldn’t. we needed time apart, to focus on other things. and i don’t know why i started hooking up with her, maybe to fill a void? life was hard without you.”

you nod, you understand. “i would have come straight back.” you say, and he smiles.

“i know. and that’s why i couldn’t.”

you sit in silence for a while, thinking about him. the life you had before. but also the life you had now. and it had worked. he was yours. no one else’s.

“i understand. i really do. im so proud of you”

“for what?”

“everything, matt. you say you saw me thriving but every single day, i saw you. and chris and nick. and maybe im selfish that i would have come back so quickly, but im proud of you, okay? so fucking proud.”

and his lips are on yours immediately, pushing you against the car window, and you can’t help but giggle into him.

“i should be grateful, i suppose” you mutter against his lips, and he pulls away to look at you with a questioning glare. you shrug. “cause now i know no other chick can fill your void.”

“oh shut up” he mumbles, but you’re both laughing as he kisses you again.

[joelslegalwhre]

Paddock Pass pt.3

One of max‘s love languages (at least in this fic) is physical touch, don‘t try to convince me otherwise. (I didn’t include the country/name of the gp by purpose, please don’t be confused haha) Sooo are you ready for some angst, some drama and a good time? Buckle up friends, it‘s gonna be a bumpy ride.

(You ever get distracted by Pedro Pascal tiktoks and spent an hour on your phone?…I‘m asking for a friend)

Thank you so much for the love on the first two parts! I‘m beyond grateful for every comment, reblog and like🩶

pairing: max verstappen x fem!reader, dad!toto wolff x reader

word count: 3.1k

warnings: angst, fluff, toto being a bitch (or is he just a protective dad?), bad dad-daughter dynamics, unapproved relationship, cursing, insults, mutual pining turning into more, max has fallen head over heels, they act like an old married couple and don‘t even notice, kissing, light make out session at the end, not proofread

summary: After a horrible qualifying, Max manages to win the race. When he sees you afterwards, and looses all of his elf control. Which Toto doesn‘t welcome one bit. Oh what a simple kiss can do. But was it just that, a simple kiss?

Masterlist || taglist || part one || part two || part three

"Sorry but this is P15 Max, P15." his race engineer spoke through the radio, "Yeah, of course it is." Max answered annoyed. What should it have been? P1? Surely not, after his engine had started misfunctioning and in the end stopped working all together. He had the best lap time of them all, but with ten minutes left of q2, someone else would eventually drive faster than him. 

As he got out of the car, you could practically feel the bad mood he was in. Everyone who knew Max, could. And if it was you who just got out of your car, not being able to finish the qualifying that was looking so promising, you would've wanted to punch something. 

It was surprising you, how 'calm' he stayed. Max had temper, and you liked that, but sometimes it got a little out of hand - him kicking the car or not talking to anyone for hours -. Not this time, though. 

When he came back to the garage, his car still parked on the gravel, he took off his helmet, and walked straight to you. "You coming with me?" he asked, helmet in one hand, running the other through his slightly damp hair. "Yeah, of course." you nodded and got up from your seat. 

You followed him out of the garage, trying to keep up with his fast steps. He was practically running to the Red Bull facility. 

Max noticed your attempt to catch up to him, and slowed down, waiting for you. "Sorry." he said and continued walking, his steps still quick, but manageable. 

As Max and you were walking to the Red Bull facility, all eyes were glued on the two of you. Everyone eager to get a shot of Max.

You felt Max's fingers brush against your own, intertwining them with yours. It was his way of trying to stay calm, the warmth of your hand soothing him and helping him, not to do something he'd regret later. 

You felt your cheeks getting warm at the gesture. You loved when he did that. It was an indication of the trust that he had in you, like a security blanket. 

"Max?" you asked him, your voice quiet but still loud enough for him to hear you. "Hm?" You looked at him, giving his hand a gentle squeeze, "You'll win the race tomorrow, it doesn't matter where you start," you gave him a lopsided smile, "You always win." 

His want to kiss you almost got the better of him. All me managed to do instead was to brush his thumb over yours, holding your hand just a little tighter than before. 

"And that's the last corner before the straight!" the commentator almost screamed into the mic, "I can't believe he did that," he continued excitedly, "That's it! Max Verstappen wins the Grand Prix, starting from P15!" 

You shot up from your seat, throwing your hands in the air. "Yes! There you go!" you shouted as if he could hear you, the excitement overwhelming. The garage was going insane, everyone hugging each other, cheering. You were right in the middle of it all, and it felt like a fever dream. You told him he'd win, but it was a lot of hard work to actually cross the finish line as first. 

You let out a deep breath, smiling at the TV as you saw Max driving back to parc fermé. All the mechanics and the rest of the team got up to gather there. "C'mon!" one of the mechanics nudged your shoulder, smiling at you. You mirrored his expression, following them outside. 

Max was still wearing his helmet when he ran towards your group and jumped into the crowd of mechanics that were shouting, whistling and cheering. When he was back on the ground, he shook hands with Christian, and some others, before he noticed you.

You still had a smile plastered on your face, that said "I told you." and even though he had his helmet covering most of his face, you knew he was also beaming.

Max slung his arms around your frame, lifting your feet from the floor, as he pressed you against his suited chest. Your arms found their place around his neck, and you hugged him as close as you could, with the helmet between you. 

When you let go of each other, you grasped his arms, something you did when you were excited or nervous, he had noticed. "You did it!" you squeaked and slightly jumped up and down with his arms still firmly in your grip. "You. Did. It." your voice was so full of joy and excitement, but above all you were so immensely proud of him. 

"You told me to," he said with a grin in his voice, as he freed his arms from your grip just to hold them in his again, "I couldn't disappoint my best girl." 

Just as he pulled you into another quick hug, you hoped that he couldn't feel your heart beating faster than his car passed the finish line. 

„"You better not." you joked.

You watched him going back to weight himself with his gear, taking his helmet off and running a hand through his hair, as he did so often. But after he did that, and put his helmet to the side, turning around. "Sorry," he said to the lady trying to talk to him, miles away. "I forgot something…"

Max almost ran back to the fence, where all of you were standing. You gave him a confused look, silently asking him what he was doing. 

The moment he reached you, still standing at your spot in the front, it turned into a curious one. Every part of your body was shaking, not knowing what to expect. 

„Is everything al-„ 

Max shut you up the second his hands cupped your face and his lips crashed down on yours. 

The kiss wasn't soft, and it wasn't harsh either, but full of desperation and longing. Full of all the emotions both of you had suppressed over the last months. It was perfect. 

Feeling his lips touch yours was a feeling like no other, you felt safe, protected and loved. You felt so much love through it, and if his hands wouldn't still cup your face, holding you up, your knees might've just given in.

As you parted, Max leaned his forehead against yours. "More than alright, actually." he whispered. 

Max didn't want to leave you there, he wanted to take your hand and go somewhere more private. Somewhere he could finally tell you just how much he loved you, how badly he needed you. 

"And now our winner, Max Verstappen!" He took a deep breath before he got onto the podium, waving to the crowd. He heard people cheering and whistling, and when he looked down to where you were standing, he couldn't contain his smile. You were holding your hands on both sides of your mouth, cheering him on with a loud "Whooow!"

You saw him looking at you and shot him a big smile, holding both thumbs up. 

Max chuckled as he took his place in the middle. When the anthems were playing, all he could do was stare at you. 

But soon all the bliss was gone, when Max was back in the garage with the trophy sitting on one of the tables, both of you seemed to remember that you were in fact not alone when you had kissed. 

Max had his arms wrapped around your waist, while you drew shapes on his arm. "Are you angry?" he sounded concerned.

"No!" Your answer came out quicker than you could think, and Max immediately let out a relieved breath. "Max," you almost whispered, "I‘d do it again, if that's what you mean." You were afraid to look into his eyes, so you kept your gaze fixed on his arms, "I don't care who has seen it, if my Dad did. I mean he probably did, and," Max interrupted your rambling by placing his fingers under your chin, making you look at him, "Babe," there it was again, the one small word. But this time you noticed it.

"Look at me." he continued. Max's voice was soft and quiet as he caressed your chin. "Don't worry about him, okay? We're in this together, and we'll manage it just fine." 

You knew he was just as worried as you were, but the way he tried to calm you made you love him even more. Love. You loved him. Max Verstappen. The boy who you never thought of saying so much as a "hello" to, accepting to just live with the crush you had on him. 

Your hands found his neck, and you slowly pulled him towards you, "Okay." was all you whispered before connecting your lips a second time. This kiss was shorter, a peck on the lips almost, but it was just as perfect as the first one was. 

"You ready to go?" he asked against your lips. "Mhm."  you answered, but your voice didn‘t have the same tone to it. 

The moment you intertwined your hands with Max's, you could hear your name being called, or more precisely, shouted.

You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath. "Here we go." 

Max gave your hand an encouraging squeeze.

"We got this." he kissed your hair and you both started walking towards the happening. 

Your Dad wasn't allowed to step foot into the Red Bull garage as someone from Mercedes, and there were already several securities keeping him from doing so.

Which didn't stop him from talking. 

"Du kommst jetzt mit." he told you to follow him. You knew his emotions were all over the place, when he started talking in his mother tongue. You could understand it most of the time, he raised you after all, but you rarely answered him in german. Since Max knew a good amount of german, he understood what he was saying. 

You didn't want to draw too much attention to the situation - clearly impossible - or start a fight right in front of them all, so you just dragged Max along with you as you followed Toto.

He seemed to know where he wanted to go, he was practically running. You just looked back at Max, giving him a look of "what the heck is this going to be". 

Max cared about you, more than you knew, more than he should be able to after just so little time. And if Toto just said so much as a wrong word or raised his voice, he could not hold back. The thought about what could follow for his work, long forgotten.

Toto stopped in his tracks so suddenly, that you almost ran into him.

"Are you done running now?" you asked him, already annoyed with how he was behaving.

"Oh I am, but trust me I'm not done with you, Fräulein."

You hated the word. He only ever used it when you were in trouble, and whenever someone called you it, you felt small. 

"Don't cal me that." you said coldly, "You know how much I hate it." 

"You know what I hate?" his voice sharp as he spoke, „When my daughter whores around with the opposite team. Like some Boxenluder?" 

Did he really just call you a pit babe? You could just scoff at him. It hurt that he seemed to think of you that way. 

„So that's what you think this is, Dad? Whoring around? Are you serious?" your voice didn't come out as strong as you wanted it to. 

"I took your pass and five minutes later you're hanging around his neck?" He almost spit the word 'him' out, as if it made him sick. "I really thought I raised you better than this, walking through the paddock sucking dick." 

Every word you wanted to say before that, got stuck in your throat at his words. What did he just say? 

"Dad, do you even hear yourself?" you whispered in disbelieve, and hurt. 

"Don't you dare talk to her like that." Max was on his last nerve now, and you could feel it. His whole body was under tension, and his hand was twitching towards yours. 

„Oh so you're going to tell me how I should do things now? Who do you think you are?" Toto mocked him. 

"Oh, I will if you don't stop acting the way you do." Max started, "Treating your own daughter like shit, just because she's not your clone," he let out a bitter laugh, "That's the lowest of the low." 

"Max," you whispered, looking up at him, taking his hand. But he couldn't let this go on. 

„If you don't like me, that's okay. It doesn't matter. But I swear to you, if you don't stop with this bullshit, treating her like she committed high treason, I'll find a way to get you kicked out of here." His voice was bitter, and you knew he meant every word.

"And trust me, I will." 

You've never heard him talking so coldly, threatening.

"Oh yeah right. Because the whole fucking paddock is yours," your hand tightened around Max's at the words leaving your Dad's mouth. "Dad." you said firmly. You hadn't raised your voice once since this started - much to Max's astonishment - but Toto didn't seem to care as long as you didn't shout it in his face. He wanted to say something else when you snapped, "Dad, dammit, listen to me for once!"

„I'm sick and tired of you acting the way you do! I can't change who I am, god I've said this so many times, I'm sorry that I'm not the kind of daughter you'd like to have." At this, you could see something in your Dad's facade start to break, but you didn't care anymore. 

"And you know what? I'm not at all sorry for being with Max. Believe it or not, but he has shown me more love in the past month, than I think you ever could." you felt the tears burning in your eyes again, but you could also feel Max's strong hand around yours, soothing you a little. 

"I'm a grown adult, Dad. So I would very much appreciate you coming to terms with the situation. And if you can't, I'm just sorry for you." 

Toto took a deep breath, but before he could say anything, you added, "I don't expect you to suddenly love Max or be okay with whatever your problem is. But if you love me just the slightest bit, just try to, Dad." 

Without anything further, you took Max's hand in yours, gaining a sour stare from Toto. And you couldn't care less. 

You left your Dad standing in the little corner between the motor homes.

"Are you okay?" Max asked with a worried tone. "No." you answered him quietly. 

Of course, you weren't, but Max wanted to make sure how you felt. He began caressing your hand with his thumb, while he was guiding you to the Red Bull motor home. 

He walked straight to his drivers room, knowing it would be quiet and private. "Hey Max, do you have a second?" Helmut waved at him. "Not now okay? Sorry." Max shot him an apologizing smile, but when Helmut's eyes wandered to you, he understood, giving the two of you an encouraging nod. You tried your best to smile at him, before Max led the way up to his drivers room. 

You've been in there several times, but this time, you were happier than ever for this small space of privacy. 

"Come here." Max  patted his lap. He had already sat down on the small couch on the other end of the room. You walked over to him and cuddled up in his lap. He was warm and his smell engulfed you. You took a deep breath. 

"Thank you."

Max looked down to where your head was resting on his shoulder, his arms wrapped tightly around you. "For what?" 

"For putting him in his place, for sticking up for me," you nuzzled your face deeper into him, "For being there for me, I guess." 

You could feel Max moving underneath you, and then you felt his lips on your hair. "I'd do it again, as many times as possible. I hope you know that." 

You looked up, still in his embrace. "I do." A small smile crept upon your lips. 

You looked into his eyes, and all you could see in them was honesty and, you dared to think, love. Your hand gently cupped his cheek, and you run your fingers over his stubble.

"Can you please just kiss me now?" you whispered to his lips, as Max could only stare at you. 

He wasted not a second, reuniting his lips with yours. 

The familiar feeling of his lips touching yours, almost made him groan into the kiss. 

He had watched you walk through the paddock for years. The thought that you'd never be wearing one of his team shirts stung with him, but he'd be happy to just talk to you. That's all he ever dreamt of, and now look where he was.

You parted your lips from his, just for a second, to swing your leg over his lap to straddle him. "You have no idea how long I've dreamed about this." Max said, his eyes taking you in while his fingers tucked a stand of hair back behind your ear. "Yeah? Then why are you still talking?" you teased him, but letting him know that you felt exactly the same when he silenced you with his lips. 

Getting to taste you as his tongue moved over the softness of your lips, he could've died happily right then. The sounds of content, mixed with small moans of pleasure filled the room as you deepened the kiss. Max hands had found their way to your waist to pull you even closer. You enjoyed every second of it, the way his tongue felt against yours and the overwhelming feeling of contentedness. 

Panting heavily, you were forced to pull back. Your foreheads still touching, eyes closed.

"I'll always be there for you, I promise." Max whispered against your lips. His hands cupped your waist, drawing little shapes with his thumbs. 

Your own hands were placed in his hair, gently caressing him.

You placed your lips back on his, a silent promise that you would, too, not leave his side.

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[fanficsbysteve]

Authors Note: So that "Make Me Write" inspired me so I finished this story after I got home from work last night. I stayed up later than I wanted to so I waited until this morning to post. I've tagged the people below as they were the ones who got me to get this finished. Hopefully you enjoy the full story: @reads8hoursperday @weewookinard I should really make a Tag List for anyone who wants to be tagged when I post anything on here. I put a "Keep Reading" where I stopped with my Make Me Write so you can see all the good stuff that came to my brain afterwards under that cut.

Rating: G

W/C: 2735

***

Tommy sat at the bar, slowly sipping on the drink in front of him. Two fingers of scotch on the rocks. His drink of choice for the night at least. He hated what he had done to Evan. But it had to be done. Tommy was just a phase with Evan. He didn’t see any of the trauma, the scars that Tommy had carefully concealed from the world. A mask he kept up to avoid the pain. A mask that was slowly slipping off.

Sal Deluca walked up and sat on the stool next to him, “What’s up, homo?”

“You do realize that if I were anyone else,” Tommy looked up from his drink to Sal, “That would probably get you punched.”

“Yeah, well I’m me and you are you,” Sal said, “So what’s up? What has you sitting here drinking,” Sal sniffed the drink, “Some very top shelf scotch,” Sal motioned for the same from the bartender.

Tommy felt tears welling up in his eyes. He sniffed a couple times before he stopped the tears from falling. His voice was quiet, “I ended things with Evan.”

Sal took his drink, “Damn,” he took a sip, “You really were into Baby Buckley. What happened?”

                Tommy finished off his drink, “It just all went wrong,” Tommy felt the tears welling up again, “It just went so wrong. He went on this long talk about admiring me. He talked about how brave I was. It was overwhelming. He didn’t see me.”

                “And you just ended it?” Sal looked over at Tommy, “Pretty stupid of you,” Sal laughed a bit. Tommy looked up at Sal while he motioned for another drink. Sal continued, “Did you at least try to understand where he was coming from?”

                “He said all this stuff, then asked me to move in with him,” Tommy said, “He’s new to all this. To being a member of the LGBT community. I’m just the shiny new thing for him. Like everything shiny and new, you eventually get bored of it and find something else that’s shiny and new. I couldn’t handle being tossed away by someone I love,” Tommy didn’t catch his words quickly enough.

                “Someone you love, eh?” Sal raised an eyebrow. Tommy mentally cursed himself to letting that slip. He had been so good at keeping control. But Evan. Evan made him lose control, “And in all your talks about admiration, did you actually tell him that?”

                Tommy shook his head, “I didn’t want to push him away,” Tommy explained, “I didn’t want to be too forward and to be too needy. I was scared if I told him that he would freak out and things would end.”

                “Well things did end but not because he freaked out, I guess,” Sal mentioned, “What I’m getting here, and I could be very wrong because I don’t really get how gay minds work, is that Buckley decided to jump ahead a few steps.”

                “Jump ahead?” Tommy was confused, “What does that even mean?”

                “Well neither one of you mentioned the dreaded L word,” Sal continued, “But Buckley decided that he wanted you to move in. Now I know in my love life, the entire moving in part doesn’t happen until after you have had a lengthy discussion about feelings, mutuality of them, and discuss moving things to another level.”

                Tommy just stared at Sal. Oddly enough what he was saying was making sense. But Tommy couldn’t just fix things after he went nuclear on his relationship with Evan. A sense of realization started to come across Tommy’s face.

                “So, what happened is Buckley moved ahead to the move in with him phase of things, which is a couple steps ahead of where you should have been,” Sal didn’t notice any change in Tommy’s look, “What that should have clued you into is that this boy has feelings for you in return. Feelings he doesn’t fully understand even though if rumours are true, he should know what Love feels like as he’s broken more than a few women’s hearts over the years.”

                “I have to go,” Tommy put some money down on the bar, “Thank you Sal,” Tommy pulled Sal into a hug, “I know this isn’t your forte but thank you for letting me talk and telling me how stupid I am.”

                Tommy got up to leave, “I would like to point out,” Sal replied, “That I did not actually call you stupid. Just pointed out that Buckley jumped the gun a little.”

                Tommy wasn’t paying attention at that point. He was heading out the door as fast as he could get out. He hailed a cab after he got out. He wasn’t stupid enough to drive after he had been drinking. He was a first responder. He had seen what drunk driving can do.

                The cab pulled out and Tommy gave him the address to Evan’s loft. Got he hoped he was still home. He checked his phone to see what time it was and saw a few messages from Eddie. He unlocked his phone and went to the message app.

                ED: What kind of dumbass are you?

                ED: I have a very drunk Buck on my couch.

                ED: I think he’s passed out and I think he’s crying in his sleep.

                ED: I seriously want to know. What kind of dumbass are you?

                Tommy asked the driver to change where they were heading and gave him Eddie’s address instead. While they were driving, he frantically started to message Eddie.

                TK: I’m the worst kind of dumbass.

                TK: I just freaked out. He started talking about admiring me, and how I was transformative for him. And then he asked me to move in and it was all too much and brought back some trauma that happened years ago.

                TK: I’m just a dumbass, ok. I’m on my way to your place right now. Don’t let Evan leave.

                ED: Considering how drunk he is I hadn’t planned on it.

                ED: So, he asked you to move in and it freaked you out?

                TK: You have no idea the things I’ve been suppressing throughout the years. I’ve crafted a very intricate mask that I don’t let down. Nobody has seen the real Tommy in years because I hide him so well.

                ED: Jesus dude. And you couldn’t just talk to Buck about all this? You had to rip his heart out and stomp on it?

                TK: I wasn’t thinking ok. I was stupid and in love and I didn’t want to get hurt when he inevitably found someone new.

                ED: This idiot is in love with you, you idiot. You were practically made for each other.

                Tommy was shocked at that last message. I mean Sal had clued him into that with his “Baby Buckley jumped a few steps” speech but this was just more confirmation of that.

                TK: He never told me that.

                ED: Well, you did break up with him. I’m quite sure he meant to say that but you sorta left.

                TK: I get that I was in the straight world for less than a blip so I’m not 100% certain how you would do it, but I’m pretty sure that a person should say ‘I love you’ before they ask you to move from your house with a backyard and a garage and a car lift into their tiny loft.

                ED: We all know Buck is an idiot. You are the one who decided to date him and give him a second chance after all that Ally talk. You should have just assumed he was being an idiot again and just went with it. I highly doubt he would have expected you to move into his Loft.

                TK: I’m almost at your place. I’ll discuss the intricacies of the gay world with you one day. Today however is not that day.

                Tommy’s cab pulled up in front of Eddie’s house. Tommy paid the driver, thanked him, and got out, almost running towards the door. Eddie was already waiting at the door for Tommy as he came barreling through, “He’s in the living room,” Eddie called as he ran past.

                Tommy got to the living room and there was Evan curled up on the couch. He looked so small and fragile. Tommy could hear some sniffling coming from the couch. He felt his heart ripping apart again. He gently walked toward the end where Evan’s head was laying. Gently lifting up Evan’s head and slipping onto the couch, Tommy put his head onto his lap, gently stroking his hair. Evan sniffled and curled up deeper into Tommy’s lap, “Tommy,” he said quietly.

                “I’m here,” Tommy replied, “I’m not going anywhere.”

                Evan sighed, and then jolted up, “TOMMY!” he yelled almost falling off the couch.

                Tommy was jolted as well. Evan sat up right and stared at Tommy, “Hey,” Tommy said.

                Evan looked at Tommy, eyes puffy from the tears that Tommy caused, “What are you doing here?” Evan asked, his voice hoarse, he was very drunk. The beer bottles littering the table didn’t shake that assumption. Eddie was standing in the entrance to the living area. He was staying away from all of this. Tommy couldn’t blame him.

                “Well after what happened between us,” Tommy went on, “I went to a bar and had a couple drinks. I called Sal cause I needed to talk,” Tommy noticed the slight confusion on Evan’s face, “Sal and I used to be in the 118. He got transferred to the 122 by Bobby years ago. Anyways, I sat and talked with Sal, and he gave me a moment of clarity. Eddie helped it along. And I realized that I was stupid.”

                “You won’t hear me argue,” Evan said.

                “Evan,” Tommy choked, his own tears starting to slide down his face, “You are the missing part of my soul. I didn’t realize it fully until I had lost you. I felt complete, and then when I left earlier, I felt a part of me stay with you. And I know you don’t want to hear this from me after what I said to you,” Tommy took a breath, “And I don’t blame you if you don’t forgive me. But I love you more than life itself,” Tommy exhaled a deep breath that he felt he had been holding all evening, “I didn’t think I could love again after all that had happened to me in the past, and I didn’t want to. But it found me and it scared me.”

                Evan was abashed with what he was being told but he kept quiet and let Tommy continue, “That day when you were hosting your funeral for Billy Boils, that was the day I knew,” Tommy felt tears welling up in his eyes, “I knew that you were the one. The one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. And I started to realize that I was I love with you,” Tommy’s tears started to fall again, “Something about earlier. You just unexpectedly started talking about admiring me, and how I was transformative like your relationship with Abby, and don’t get me wrong, Abby is a wonderful woman who I hurt, but she was also transformative for me as well, just in a different way. And then you asked me to move in. And something just snapped in my brain. Something just screamed ‘This can’t last, you’ve been the first for someone, but you are never the last.’ And I let those fears control my actions.”

                “I want you to be my last,” Evan finally got words out, “Just because I’m new to this whole being attracted to men thing doesn’t mean I’m new to the world. I know what love feels like. I know what I want and what I want is you.”

                “I know that now,” Tommy replied. He reached out and stroked Evan’s cheek, trying to wipe away the tears that he caused himself, “I know I don’t deserve it, and I have so much that I need to work through before I’m the man you deserve, but would you give me a second chance this time?”

                Evan sat still for a minute, “You did hurt me. And it will take some time to earn my trust back,” Tommy sighed as if he knew this would happen. This always happened. He let his hand drop, “But we need to talk more. And I would like to get to know who you really are. Scars and all,” Evan grabbed Tommy’s hand from where it fell and brought it up to his face, caressing it gently against his cheek, “I love you as well you idiot.”

                Tommy reached over to Evan and grabbed him. He pulled him in close. A simple hug right now, “I love you so much. I don’t want to lose you.”

                “You won’t,” Evan replied. Evan curled up into Tommy’s arms.

                “Um,” Eddie said, “Did you two need a moment? Should I set up a guest room for you?”

                “Oh right,” Evan said, “I don’t think either of us is safe to drive anywhere,” He looked up at Tommy, “Stay with me tonight?”

                “Always,” Tommy said.

                Eddie sighed, “Give me a minute to get some stuff for a bed,” He walked out of the room. “And don’t you two even think about having sex on that couch or you will both live to regret it,” He called back in after.

                Tommy held Evan close to his chest, not letting him go. Evan could hear his heart racing right now. They kept silent, just laying there on the couch. This was a perfect moment. Tommy signed and felt complete again, “I’m going to have to try and convince you to move into my house though,” Tommy added, “I’m sorry but your place is just small,” He smiled.

                Evan smiled back, “I don’t think I thought my wording through,” he explained, “And I didn’t think you would actually want to move into my loft. It was more the ‘Let’s move in together’ part that I was trying to convey.”

                “We will need to work on communication,” Tommy held Evan close, “Each day I want to learn one new fact about you that I don’t know. And in return I’ll let you know a fact about me that you don’t know.”

                “You think I’ll be able to stop at just one fact?” Evan sounded incredulous, “Have you not been around me for the past six months?”

                “I don’t want to overwhelm either of us so lets just stick to one for now,” Tommy said.

                “I make no promises,” Evan replied, his voice haughty. Eddie chose that time to come in to let them know that the guest room was ready. He also asked them to please not have sex in his house tonight.

                “At least wait until you are at one of your places,” Eddie begged, “I don’t need to hear that.”

                “I make no promises,” Evan replied as he shakily got up, “Though I may be too drunk to do anything anyways.”

                “I’ll make sure that he behaves,” Tommy added. His head had cleared up a little more than Evan’s. Adrenaline must have burned off the alcohol in his system or something like that, “Just lead us to where we need to go.”

                Eddie leads the two men to a room with a bed. It was fairly sparse. But it was a bed. Evan went to the bed and faceplanted onto the pillows and immediately fell asleep. Tommy crawled in, wrapped his arms around Evan, who immediately curled up and sank into Tommy’s embrace. Eddie smiled, “I’m sure you remember where the bathroom is. Please don’t puke anywhere,” Eddie had a thought and left before returning with a small garbage can, “If you think Buck might get drunk sick, please aim him towards this.”

                “I’ll do my best,” Tommy said, “Good night, and thank you for taking care of him until I got here.”

                “He’s my best friend,” Eddie replied, “What else was I supposed to do?”

                Eddie smiled at Tommy and Evan laying in the bed. Evan had started to snore softly. Tommy just held him close and wouldn’t let go. He had to protect what they had now. Protect it at all costs. Slowly Tommy drifted off to sleep, the gentle snoring of Evan lulling him into a sense of peace.

***

Author's Note: And thus ended another of my story ideas that just pops into my head. Let me know what you all think of this and I'll see you all next time I do a Make Me Write or get one of my stories complete.

Love, Steve

[davidtennantgenderenvy]

Things That Happened At Dallas Fan Expo Day One (P2)

I kept waving my bi flag at people when I liked their cosplays Lauren your autism is showing Jodie Whittaker called me darling oh my gosh she’s precious

I asked her what advice Thirteen and Beth would give each other! She said “never give up hope” and “cherish every moment you get” and I also complimented her on her singing which made her very happy

My first meeting with David was team photo op with Jodie and the second I saw him I kind of collapsed a bit a the next thing I knew he was kind of catching me and holding both my hands and looking me directly in the eyes just beaming down on me the kindest, crinkliest, most sincere smile I’ve seen in my entire life and for all of 20 seconds I felt like the specialest person on the face of the planet

at some point I said “hi I’m Merlin’s girlfriend!!!” And he’s like “oh that’s wonderful!” and then this absolute dork just says “WELL DONE TEAM” David Tennant the man shaped being you are

it was so fun after the photo was taken seeing other people who were doing and about to do the same thing and also going insane and being like “I KNOW RIGHT” like the effect he has on people is unparalleled

met a few tumblr mutuals and people who’ve seen the video essay which was just so cool, thank you so much to everyone i got to see!

things started to go a bit downhill around late afternoon, David’s stuff got incredibly behind which resulted in Jodie’s solo op being incredibly behind, luckily there were loads of lovely nerds to chat with like I’ve never been in a room where this many people are this insane about the same dude

when we FINALLY got in line for David’s autograph he took forever to show up and god bless his poor sweet heart I have no clue how he ever got through all of those people there had to be like a thousand, all of whom stayed after the con had technically closed just to see him. Unfortunately he really couldn’t take his time like he wanted to which meant the questions I had meticulously planned ended up being completely useless and when it was my turn I was a stammering bedraggled mess and the poor thing was too confused to say more than two words at a time and then before I could ask him anything else I was shooed away before I even could process it happened

obviously I was very sadwetpathetic afterwards and my feet were KILLING ME but it’s okay, I get another shot tomorrow! And of course I have to commend David for his incomparable generosity, he is a DIAMOND for staying so long even after the con closed to make sure everyone could get what they paid for.

oh and I kissed my boyfriend for the first time :))) @elsinore-and-inverness

[blue-willow-tree]

Mmm, baby, you know I love getting into that filthy little mind of yours. And right now? I want you to confess—every last dirty little thought. Come on, baby. You know you love spilling all your dirtiest secrets for me. Let me hear every. last. one.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

6 – Tell me, sweetheart… have you ever touched yourself thinking about someone who wasn’t your partner? I wonder if you felt guilty afterward… or if you came even harder because of it?

17 – Has anyone ever watched you get off live? Did you like knowing they were watching, stroking along with you? And be honest—have you ever watched someone fall apart on camera, wishing it was you making them cum?

29 – Walk me through it, baby. What do you do when it’s just you, your hands, and that dirty little brain of yours? How long do you last before you’re gasping, squirming, so desperate to let go?

44 – Be honest with me, sweetheart… have you ever gotten off to a mutual’s pictures? Whose? Do they know how messy you got for them? Maybe they should.

45 – What’s the kinkiest, filthiest thing you’ve ever begged for over text? Did they give it to you, or did they make you wait?

54 – What’s the most you’ve ever cum in one day? I bet you were a shaking, ruined little mess by the end, weren’t you? Did it feel too good?

59 – Who’s the most inappropriate person you’ve ever fantasized about? What exactly did you imagine them doing to you?

67 – If I left you alone right now with just a search bar and five minutes to get yourself off, what would you type in, baby? What’s that one thing you need to see when you’re too desperate to think straight?

78 – If you could have any mutual under you right now, who would it be? And do they know how badly you want them? Maybe you should tell them.

99 – Tell me something filthy you’ve never told anyone before. Something so wrong, so desperate, that you’ve kept it locked away. Be a good girl and confess.

- @mommyownsmee ᥫ᭡.

Hello there, pretty Moon x As per usual, you've made me blush. I know you'll be having some fun with this later x

6: Have you ever masturbated to someone you know who isn’t your partner?

Never to somebody else's partner, no, unless you count Wanda Maximoff and Elizabeth Olsen- And never to somebody else whilst I was dating somebody. But I've definitely touched myself to the thought of people that I wasn't in a relationship with x

17: Has anyone ever watched you masturbate live online? Have you ever watched someone masturbate live online?

Through video calls, yes, as well as sending videos and pictures whilst it was happening x Never through a live online thing for anybody and everybody to see, no.

29: Describe a typical masturbation session.

Oh I think you know it very well by now, love, but I'll explain it anyhow x I like to fetch my vibrator and place a new battery in, and then give it a wash. I take just my pants and underwear off, never my shirt, I only pull that up if I'm in the mood to grope myself a bit. I start it on the lowest setting, and either talk to a specific someone or I'll go through some of my favourite pictures saved to my gallery or I'll spend some time on Tumblr or X <3

44: Have you ever masturbated to a mutual’s selfies before? Tag them if you dare.

Oh love, you know the answer to this. And I think I should ask you the same exact question ♡

45: What’s the kinkiest thing you’ve ever asked someone to do while sexting?

To stuff their underwear in their mouth while fucking themselves, and that if it didn't help to keep them quiet, to put another one in. (But I think you knew that one already <3)

54: What’s the most amount of times you’ve orgasmed in a day?

8 times <3

59: Who’s the most inappropriate person you’ve ever had a fantasy about?

Wanda Maximoff and Steve Roger's (he's literally such a gentleman I couldn't help it)(That was back when I was still figuring out if I was lesbian or not)

67: If you had 5 mins alone to get yourself off with porn right now, what would you type in the search bar?

Oh you're cruel for this one. You're lucky I have a humiliation kink, else I'd never ever answer. Well, I watch those sorts of videos on X, and what I like to do is go down a rabbit hole on random accounts and see everything they've reblogged. It gets me off to see the filthy things people enjoy, and to know that they have no clue I'm watching them <3

78: Which mutual would you most like to fuck right now? Do they know? Tag them if you dare!

Oh gosh, this is so hard. How could you ever ask me to answer such a question? You're so mean for this. You are troublesome. You should come over. Wink wink.

99: Admit something sexual that you’ve never told anyone else before.

I get turned on by the thought of crying about something and somebody being so turned on by it that they coo at me and gently manipulate me into shutting my mind off (them using me).

[amillionideas]

Ron and Percy

The dynamic between Ron and Percy has so much untapped potential, and it's such a missed opportunity in canon. Of all people, Ron would be the one who truly understands Percy’s feelings of guilt and alienation. Both of them know what it’s like to walk away from the people who love them and to live with the weight of that decision afterward.

For Percy, distancing himself from the Weasleys during the Ministry years wasn’t about a lack of love, it was about wanting to prove himself. He felt misunderstood and dismissed, so he chose a path where he thought he could finally be seen as capable and important. But when the truth about the Ministry came out, the guilt must have been overwhelming. Coming back couldn’t have been easy, not just because of the damage he caused, but because he likely wondered if he even deserved forgiveness.

Ron, more than anyone else, would understand that. He knows what it’s like to let his insecurities drive him to a breaking point. When he abandoned Harry and Hermione during the Horcrux hunt, it wasn’t because he didn’t care, it was because he felt like he was failing and didn’t know how to handle it. And just like Percy, he came back full of regret, unsure if he could ever truly make it right. That shared experience, the pain of leaving and the fear that you can’t undo it, would be the foundation of something real between them.

Ron wouldn’t judge Percy for his mistakes because he’s made the same kind himself. He knows how easy it is to act out of hurt and frustration, and how hard it is to forgive yourself afterward. He would be the perfect person to help Percy work through his guilt, not with lectures or platitudes, but with the quiet understanding of someone who’s been there.

I can imagine a scene after the war where Ron takes the first step (or maybe I should say second step, because the first step was Percy coming back and it should be recognised), reaching out to Percy, not just to offer forgiveness, but to remind him that he still belongs. It would be such a powerful moment if Ron told Percy, “You’re not the only one who’s walked away, we’ve all messed up. But you came back. That’s what matters.” That kind of reassurance, coming from someone who knows exactly how it feels to leave and to ache to return, would mean everything to Percy.

Their relationship could grow into something grounded and profound, built on the mutual understanding that mistakes don’t define who they are. I love the idea of Ron quietly supporting Percy as he rebuilds those burned bridges, not because he has to, but because he knows how much it means to have someone believe in you after you’ve fallen short. They both carry the scars of leaving, but together, they could remind each other that coming back is what really counts.

[landofzero-archive]

Eden TRIP Album MC Talk Series

Season: ☆

MC 1

Hiyori: “Thank you for coming to our, Eden’s, independent live today! It sure is a blessing to be able to celebrate the album release together!

We’ve loaded our love into the songs to be delivered to you. Receive them without leaving out a single one, okay……♪”

Jun: “The first song we performed was KEEP OUT.

How was this song that was specifically written for the album?”

Nagisa: “…… I’m glad that you seem to like it. KEEP OUT means ‘no trespassing’.

…… We’re going to break into everyone’s hearts. Into the shining paradise, like a lurking viper.”

Ibara: “And then we will slowly and carefully pour poison into you, and show you sweet dreams.

So that tonight’s stage may become an unforgettable memory……♪”

Jun: “Afterwards, we’ll perform two songs; one after the other~ That first song is—”

Nagisa and Ibara: “…… Melting Rouge Soul.”

MC 2

Ibara: “Melting Rouge Soul from Adam, and Ruby Love from Eve have been performed.

Both of these were songs unveiled at Chocolat Fes— during Valentine’s season.

Nagisa: “…… Yeah. At that time, the fact that both Adam and Eve were releasing new songs at the same time became a hot topic.

…… The cheering during the moment Ibara and I said “Melting Rouge Soul” felt really good.”

Ibara: “Fufu. I’m sure there are a lot of people who did not expect it because it’s called Eden’s independent live.

I told you, didn't I? That I’ll show you sweet dreams……♪”

Hiyori: “Adam’s fans, Eve’s fans, as well as Eden’s fans—

Today we will satisfy every single person who loves us.

You’re prohibited from looking away! Keep your eyes on us till the very end♪

Jun-kun, you can’t blink either!”

Jun: “Eeh, please let me blink~ My eyes will get dry.

Oh, seems like they got everything ready while we were talking. The next song will be a solo song.

Ibara Saegusa’s— Salute Desire.”

MC 3

Ibara: “— That was Salute Desire

Oops. Thank you for the warm applause.

Though I endeavored to give a more perfect performance than usual—

During a solo song, everyone’s gazes are concentrated on me from every possible angle, so my mind could not even be inattentive for even a single moment.

Above all else, I’m glad that you were satisfied♪

Now, let me briefly introduce myself.

I am Eden’s Ibara Saegusa. Salute~☆

As you see, alongside my idol activities, I’m also serving concurrently as the producer of Eden and the vice president of the agency.

I’m very happy to be able to deliver the new song as well as the accompanying event to everyone.

I will continue to work energetically, so I ask you to please continue to treat Eden and Cosmic Production well☆

The next song will be brought to you by the four members of Eden.

Let us show you our way of life— Paradise Banishment -Faith Conquest-”

MC 4

Nagisa: “…… We’ve performed Paradise Banishement -Faith Conquest-.

…… It was first unveiled during Conquest wasn’t it. It’s a song containing Eden’s faith.

…… Hiyori-kun doesn’t really like it, I wonder?”

Hiyori: “No. I like the song itself. It’s a song that’s just like Eden.

But I’ve had enough of Conquest! Even if it’s a farce, I don’t want to act like we’re fighting and hating each other.

We’re aaaalways been the best united, mutually loving, unit—

I’m sure the fans don’t want to see us like that too.”

Nagisa: “…… I agree. The loud cheers that could shake the whole venue is the greatest proof of that.

…… Let’s keep getting along, Hiyori-kun.

…… As an ‘equal friend.’”

Hiyori: “Yes. ‘Equal’……♪

-Now now, next would be something everyone has been waiting for, my solo song!

Accept My Love— accept my love……!”(1)

TL Note:

He translates “Accept My Love” into Japanese here.

MC 5

Hiyori: “Thank you for listening to Accept My Love!

Yes yes. You’re smiling so much, I’m happy too☆

I’ll follow Ibara’s example and introduce myself. I am Eden’s Hiyori Tomoe!

Life isn’t all about fun. There’s times where you feel depressed and like you want to cry.

When that happens, it’s good to look at me. Because I’m the one who shines bright like the sun☆

Listen to my songs, and follow the productions I appear in—

Just imitate me and smile! Since I always have a smile on my face!

If you smile, the people around you will also smile. It’s a happiness chain reaction. What fine weather……☆

Now! Let’s move on to the next song, shall we?

All four of us will perform it, so please give us all of your support.

Eden’s— EXCEED.”

MC 6

Jun: “I’ve just performed EXCEED. This song is—”

Ibara: “Isn’t this a song with a shady history for you, Jun?”

Jun: “Wait a sec. Could you please stop saying misleading things~?

It’s not like it’s got a shady history or anything, umm……

When we released this song, I had lost my confidence and kept makin’ mistakes.

But then, Ibara went out of character and comforted me by saying,’Why do you lose confidence when there are people who view you so favorably?’……”

Ibara: “‘Out of character’ is superfluous.”

Jun: “Haha. I won’t be able to be the same as Ohiisan, Nagi-senpai, or Ibara, but to that extent—

No. That’s why, as Jun Sazanami, I’ll continue to put in the effort as myself.

Eden is where I belong, y’know~

Haha, thank you for all the applause. Sorry if I sounded like I was urging y’all to do something.”

Ibara: (Whispering) …… Honestly, Jun really was an idiot during that time.

There are so many people who love you.

Jun: “Hm? I couldn’t hear it over the applause, but you said something, right?”

Ibara: “No, it’s nothing. Please continue talking about yourself after you finish singing.

Now then, please listen. Jun Sazanami’s— Unlock the Soul.”

MC 7

Jun: “Hello, everyone. It’s Eden’s Jun Sazanami.

How was Unlock the Soul?

The lyrics were good, weren’t they~. When I sing them, I get excited.

Speaking of lyrics, apparently Ibara wrote the lyrics to the song I just sang, EXCEED, for me.

Wha~t? People might think I sound conceited when I say that.

But Nagi-senpai said it was to help me get over my slump or something. There’s no doubting it~

Well. That Ibara, he can be really kind sometimes~♪

Haha. Ibara’s looking at me from the side of the stage with a face like he just swallowed a bitter bug.

I shouldn’t get carried away, or I’ll probably get scolded later~

Now that I’ve told a story just for this special occasion, let’s get to the next song.

Eden’s— Absolute Perfection.”

MC 8

Nagisa: “…… Absolute Perfection. This is the first song we performed at Absolute.

…… I am God♪

…… Ibara, please look. Everyone’s rejoicing.”

Ibara: “It seems so. Unlike Absolute’s stage, this is a country where countless gods rule.”

Nagisa: “…… That’s not the only reason.

…… There are many people here who love us. They weren’t present at Absolute either.”

Ibara: “Indeed. The presence of fans is an idol’s strength—their powerful weapon.

However. It’s not normal for Eden to be completely dependent on our fans.

Let’s be ourselves and make a triumphant return to Absolute with our utmost strength.

Then, we will receive our laurels and make ourselves known. Eden are the best idols in the world.”

Nagisa: “…… Yes. I’m sure our fans want that as well.

…… Because we’re the strongest idols, Eden.

…… Next, I’ll perform my solo song.”

Ibara: “Everyone please listen. Nagisa Ran’s—We’re all alone.”

MC 9

Nagisa: “…… You just listened to We’re all alone.

…… I’m Eden’s Nagisa Ran. Thank you for coming to our live today.

…… Each song has its own memories. I was remembering all that happened while singing.

…… I wonder if you all have had the same experience? Since music and memories are connected to one another and committed to memory.

…… I wonder if everyone has some kind of emotional attachment to Eden’s songs.

…… If possible, I would like to ask each and every one of you individually. But, it would be difficult to do that today.

…… It would make me happy if you could let me know through a letter or handshake event.

…… I hope our songs may touch everyone’s hearts.

…… ‘The eternal paradise that touches the heart’— that’s what Eden is.

…… And now, it’s almost time for the end.

…… We’ll perform two songs in a row at the end. Eden’s— Awakening Myth.”

MC 10

Nagisa: “……  It’s a shame, but let’s close the door to paradise.”

Jun: “It was nice to meet you. Thank you for coming to Eden’s independent live today!

Did you all have fun at our live?”

Hiyori: “You got to see my finest performance, so it must have been fun!

I swear on Ibara’s glasses that it’s true☆”

Ibara: “Could you please not involve me? If you’re going to swear on something, swear on Jun’s life instead.”

Hiyori: “That’s no good! Jun-kun’s life is mine!”

Jun: “My life is my own. Could you not swear on it so casually~?”

Nagisa: “…… Hey, can I close the door to paradise?”

Jun: “C’moon, Nagi-senpai is bothered now, isn’t he?”

Hiyori: “Don’t make it sound like it’s my fault! It’s collective responsibility!”

Jun: “Alright alright. Now then, let’s meet again some time soon.”

MC 11

Ibara: “Everyone! Thank you for the magnificent encore!”

Nagisa: “…… The door to paradise opened right away.”

Hiyori: “No. It didn’t open on its own, we had to open it. With the power of everyone’s love♪

That’s why we also have to respond with love. Let’s share the love with everyone here.”

Jun: “The last song is, of course, this song!— BRAND NEW STARS!!!”

MC 12

Jun: “That was BRAND NEW STARS!!! This is truly the end.

We did our best, though. When I think about how it’s over, I feel lonely after all, huh~”

Hiyori: “Everyone, thank you for singing with us! Thank you for your magnificent smiles!

Please come and see me again! I’ll be waiting♪”

Nagisa: “…… The door to paradise shall close again.

…… But I’m sure we’ll meet again. Without stopping, we’ll continue to grow.”

Ibara: “The latest information about Eden is always posted on the official SNS. Please take make use of it☆

Thank you for coming today! We’ll see you soon, salute~♪”