#no idea what the end IS but. i have faith
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Lil angst idea ........ how do you think jjk men would react if reader defected?? (If possible could we get both pre and post defection suguru 👉👈)
Gojo:
DEVASTATED words cannot even explain the crash out this man would experience (I have a fic on this actually, still writing it tho) I think he'd go off the rails Starts hollow purpling everything That isn't a joke btw, like that's how I see it play out He'd lose hope and faith
Pre-Geto:
He'd go catatonic for a while Thinking about what went wrong and trying to figure out where he stands But he'd end up joining reader
Post-Geto:
Happy Feels reassured about his masterplan Because he definitely had moments where he doubted himself
Choso:
Confused Would try to reach out to understand Would be very conflicted about where he stands It'll drive him wild trying to choose between reader or his brother Very similar crash out like when he realised Yuji was his brother after attacking him
Toji:
I don't think he'd care He's really the type to just go with the flow Always been apolitical and just focused on himself so he'll go wherever you go Won't really take an active part in your plans but if you asked him to do something e.g. kill someone, he'd do it
Nanami:
Woah You know in a zombie apocalypse, where the crazy weirdo has a tied up zombie of their loved one that they talk to and think is genuinely okay, like living in fantasy land That would be Nanami He'd be sent to kill you, but would capture and hold you captive instead Comes in multiple times a day to clean and feed you Talks to you about his day like nothing's wrong In hopes you'll return to him
Sukuna:
He'll pat himself on the back lol You know that scene in Barbie when Ken says SUBLIME Yeah that's our man
Yuji:
Poor boy wouldn't understand He'll be traumatised Forever changed Just like Gojo was It'll force him to reaffirm his belief and faith in jujutsu society but there'll be a darkness that follows him everywhere
Megumi:
Mad at you So so so mad Mad at himself too Feels a strong sense of responsibility and blame Thinks you're stupid and you were manipulated or something But doesn't try to seek you out He's too cowardly
Inumaki:
Suffer in silence Would stop speaking all together Might start chasing you down though Thinks he can use his technique to bring you back Spiritually demolished if he tries and fails
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TW: ABUSE, CHILD ABUSE
“He wants to air this dirty laundry to the world does he…? Dabi, you fiend…you’ve been waiting for this moment…when they couldn’t prevent mass destruction…and faith in heroes is wavering.” - chapter 292
I truly, wholeheartedly, believe that MHA as a story upholds the myth of the perfect victim. I do not want to discuss if Horikoshi did that on purpose, or subconsciously because of inner bias – I find no meaning in doing so. For me the execution of an idea, in the grand scheme of the narrative, holds more value than the intention of the author. I’ve also had my fair share of people infantilizing Asian authors in the anime community for their poor writing decisions for one lifetime. It��s patronizing to both the author and the people reading it. Whether or not Horikoshi intended for his themes of abuse to paint the picture they did does not matter, because that’s how it reads as.
MHA puts victims of abuse in narrow boxes and softly dictates what’s an acceptable reaction to said abuse. Victims are continuously walking a tightrope between being deserving of compassion and sympathy and being unredeemable monsters who are too far gone and are only good for martyrdom after being put down.
Eri fits the clean cut depiction of abuse victims that media usually gears towards. She is untouched by the cruelty around her - she preserves her innocence and kindness. She isn't assertive, but rather meek and passive. She doesn't fight back with force. And when offered help, she is receptive to it. That is not to say that Eri's depiction doesn't have a place in fiction, or that her portrayal can't be representative of the experiences of some - as we all deal with trauma and the inhumanity people throw at us differently. We see the same thing in the portrayal of Fuyumi, who shares many of the qualities discussed above. The same thing applies to her - i personally love the idea of all the siblings having different reaction to their childhood trauma and abuse. It shows that victims are not some type of monolith.
But the narrative treats the "forgiving" or "receptive to help/support" victims of abuse with more grace and with much more kindness. if you are willing to forgive, or the very least be quietly tolerant, the story grants you a happy ending. Forgiveness isn't a bad thing, it is an individual choice - but an abuse victim shouldn't have to do it for them to have a happy ending.
In a vacuum Eri and Fuyumi's character arcs and depictions of abuse are good but it becomes a problem when that's the only experience and type of victim we ever hold in high value or recognize as valid and deserving of compassion. Which the story reinforces.
Touya and Tenko's backstories aren't pretty nor comfortable or easy to sit through. Their responses to abuse aren't either. Reactive abuse is very much real.
#tw abuse mention#tw trauma#tw child abuse#this is unfinished#i just don't have enough time to expand upon it cause of uni#maybe some day i will reread mha and revisit this#posting it cause it has been sitting in my drafts for a while#other thoughts are very much welcomed :)#mha critical#bnha critical#my hero academia#mha analysis#anti mha#league of villains#anti endeavor#anti enji todoroki#media analysis#anti best jeanist#i hate him#he stinks up the place#i cant tag all the characters in mha that ignore abuse in mha#unfortunately#calling abuse dirty laundry is very bad very stinky#touya todoroki#tomura shigaraki#mha dabi#discussion#personal essay#essay writing
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yam love love love that analysis on cate you just posted and was curious what your thoughts are on queers (lesbians in specific obviously) reading her as a closeted lesbian going through comphet?
tbh i could talk about this for hours but would just like to say that she legitimately had queen maeve posters all over her childhood bedroom lol didn’t believe that soldier boy shit for a SECOND.
comphet reading of cate dunlap ft. mariecate
TLDR so u don’t have to read the whole thing; all of cate’s relationships with men are overall fake and do not revolve around love, rather the forging of an idealised identity formed around media (comphet Classic). cate’s only real raw genuine untainted relationship is with a woman. ft. mariecate
id love to my favourite hobby is looking at characters through a orangepinkwhite tinged lens. cate’s relationship with luke fits the comphet bill almost too well. firstly, cate being locked up her whole childhood means the formation of identity would be entirely based on media. a very heteronormative landscape of media, which aligns with traditional comphet. you could say her relationship with luke—literally golden boy—is comphet based, the ‘gold standard’ for a relationship cate’s drawn from all that she’s consumed in her childhood years. effectually, cate’s entire early life was robbed of her. and here, she achieves her perception’s ‘perfect’ idea of a life through luke, and forms her entire identity around him (hence her desperation to keep him). this is especially evident in the fact she changed her major to ‘hero management’ just to support luke’s career. to fully commit in shadowing him, for the rest of her life.
except, it’s fake. the entire relationship is fake. by the time of the show, cate has erased and changed and warped luke’s memory, his identity to the point where his mind breaks by the pilot. the fauxness and dysfunction of luke/cate’s relationship despite their image of unattainable perfection is probably her largest comphet indicator. maybe she loved him (not enough to remain faithful, however), but it reads as more of a subconscious love of what he represented, and something to anchor her identity to, which she’s never had a chance to form. as well as a means as to gain shetty’s affection and trust, no matter if she thought it was for his own good or not. her relationship with luke was poisoned, for a multitude of reasons.
(sidenote: cate/luke comphet reminds me of jiper comphet down to the false memories piper’s charmspeak and jason as the golden boy who literally explodes so like. there’s that’s free tidbit for anybody who is tapped the fuck in.)
cate has been so deprived of love she seeks it wherever she can find it. hence her stint with andre, which obviously ends in shambles because it’s foundations are already shaky, considering she’s cheating on luke with him, and andre is fucking his best friend’s girlfriend, but is also disingenuous, because cate’s compulsion powers arguably affect andre the secondmost to luke (though, by a wide margin). these are her two only romantic interests, and they suffer the worst consequences of it.
enter.. marie moreau. and cate’s relationship with marie is more genuine than any of her romantic relationships, which i think is the most telling thing. cate and marie serve as foils to each other: both in the manslaughter of their loved ones, the way shetty attempts to use them, and how can you NOT ship two reflections of each other?
in the finale, cate reaches out her hand, and andre can’t take it, because he doesn’t trust her. you can’t blame him. inversely, marie is the one always reaching out to cate, who is constantly defending cate’s intentions and her motivations to the others—when cate doesn’t deserve the benefit of doubt. partly, it’s because marie has known cate the least amount of time, making the betrayal sting the least. but also, cate’s relationship with marie is also the one least tainted by her compulsion powers; marie is the least affected by cate’s manipulations (to love her, to stay with her), and yet, despite marie not being compelled to do so; she still retains her faith in cate. that cate is good. that cate can be good, which is a fact not even cate believes in.
marie actively sees through cate’s compulsion, and later, nulls it. there’s a reason why marie is the one to discover cate’s betryal. there’s also a reason why marie is the one to blow cate’s arm off when saving jordan. in the same episode that cate reaches out and andre draws away, marie reaches out to cate, and cate draws away. that is a very direct comparison. it also speaks to cate’s larger unwillingness to accept love that is untainted, either fear she herself will ruin it, or because she doesn’t think she deserves it.
anyways, all this to say that yes, cate could totally be read as comphet. and mariecate is totally metal as they are, romantically involved or not.
#me after randomly inserting piper mclean comphet in there#yam thinks#gen v analysis#mariecate#catemarie#i’m only spitballing#lesbian cate all the way
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one thing that got my attention in the sneak peak/season 3 premiere date reveal about that scene of lottie being choked is that courtney's expression seems a bit serene, almost defiant
and, of course, it's just a frame and we can't know the entire context yet
but, based on the comment @periwinklekryptonite (thank you, chris <3) made on discord about how, if it's travis, there's a parallel with the scene of travis' death and lottie accidentaly letting him die bc she saw laura lee's ghost, i have the theory that maybe this is how the idea that you have to almost die to contact the wilderness comes from
like, maybe teen lottie is desperate to contact the wilderness again, especially after how last season ended, in which, according to director karyn kusama's interview for harpers bazaar, lottie may have realized the others will do what they feel like doing and lottie might not matter much in this scenario
so, desperate to find a purpose, maybe teen lottie realizes that she was able to have visions when she was on the brink of death -- the food court vision when she almost died of hypothermia, and also her visions of javi's death when she was literally fighting for her life after being brutally beaten down by shauna
and, so, she asks travis for help, bc maybe he might be easier to convince than the others due to feeling lost after his brother javi died
anyways, this is just a theory, and definetely not the only possible scenario
we don't even know if it's travis, and it might as well be ben!!!!
but, i think it'd be an interesting parallel with adult timeline
it would also help to explain why travis asked for lottie's help of all ppl in adult timeline
and, most of all, it would be a way to flesh lottie's character out by showing how she feels about the wilderness and her faith during a faith crisis of sorts
(disclaimer.: i don't ship travlot neither romantically or sexually, but i think their dynamic is too intriguing, especially bc lottie is one of the girls who, in courtney eaton's own words for vulture magazine post-1x09, sexually assaulted travis.
and yet he not only became one of her most loyal and enthusiastic acolytes -- he literally spilled his own blood with no hesitation after lottie asked him to, in that offering to save shauna's and the baby's lives --, but also is seemingly the only wilderness survivor who knew where lottie was before the events of adult timeline in season 2
the showrunners already confirmed during paley fest panel last year that there's no love triangle thing and there is no romance
but, that's the thing, platonic bonds are worthy of talking about as well
especially one as mysterious as this one)
#lottie matthews#yellowjackets#travis martinez#yellowjackets showtime#yellowjackets season 3#yellowjackets theories#yellowjackets spoilers#(?) kinda
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My rough thoughts/interpretation/reflection of Solas and his relationship with Mythal after a first playthrough. It's subject to change on future playthroughs, but probably by inches (if I can ever get my audio fixed). Note that while I am trying to base all of this on canon, there is reinterpretation involved, as I do feel Mythal/Flemythal/Morrimythal was neutered somewhat in the writing process.
Spoilers for the whole of DA: The Veilguard.
When I roleplayed Solas I mostly played the relationship as benign, in large part due to her being another character whose role in Solas's life was gestured at but never defined. Which in some ways, is still true, but I think at this point it's impossible to deny she had a negative impact on him (to say the least). Since moving into fic writing I started to lean into the darker implications of their relationship, and while for the sake of rp I'm adaptable, I do still want to talk about my feelings regarding them.
I believe Solas, by aiding her, is culpable in many of the crimes they committed together- make no mistake of that, but he is also a victim of her. She says at the end she used his wisdom as a weapon, but she also used her benevolence as a tool to manipulate him, appealing to his knowledge of her nature to get what she wanted.
Her coaxing him to take a body after he states outright that "he has no wish to live as humans do" (I'm going to ignore the confusing implication that humans were around) is but the first betrayal she subjects him to, and imo the greatest crime she commits against him, specifically. At least in canon, the game skirts around the issue of vallaslin, but if the "he didn't want a body but she asked him to come" is true, then it would follow that the follow-up, "he left a scar when he burned her off her face" would also be true.
The second would be rising to the heights of the gods, and calling him the traitor for rebellion. Morrigan calls Mythal corrupted 'Retribution,' and that may be true of Mythal after her murder, but I believe long before that her benevolence had gone awry. From what I can tell, we have no concrete timeline for Elvhenan and what the gods did before and after her death, and therefore no idea what Mythal even means by tempering the other evanuris. Slavery almost certainly existed, which honestly is enough for me to say she was doing a bad job. Past codices indicate that her punishments were not just so much as exact:
"Mythal, in her wisdom, interceded in an argument between Elgar'nan and Falon'Din. With clever words, she convinced them to settle their grievance through a battle of their champions. Elgar'nan and Falon'Din agreed, and set their champions against each other rather than declare war among the gods. May those knights long be remembered, and Mythal's wisdom be praised." (x)
This and the codex describing Mythal's judgment characterise her tenure as a god as being far from bloodless.
There are also indications that not all had as much faith in Mythal's ability to see reason or cede power:
"Solas always thought" is the key phrase for me in this note. Not "we," but "Solas."
What this all means for Solas is that Mythal someone he has a deep, ancient connection to, but also someone who has hurt him deeply, violated him, used him.
And he doesn't want to face that.
Solas is quite capable of admitting his mistakes, even as he is moving onto the next one literally in the same breath... but Mythal's mistakes are never addressed by him, even at the finish, when he is holding the pommel of the knife out for her taking.
I think Solas navigates around the wrongs committed against him throughout the course of their knowing each other. His rage against the mages who forced Wisdom to take a body, to kill, may lead him to murdering them, but he never directs such anger at Mythal. He can't. The regrets he has about her literally flake and dry upon the walls of the Lighthouse because he can't. He can't face her remnant in the FadeAnd it's only at the end where he receives any catharsis in the matter, any admittance of wrongdoing against him (albeit without apology).
So in most interactions with Mythal, Solas will be very close with her, at best brushing up against the sides of where there relationship chafes. Always willing to believe the best of her, and her death granting him the mercy of being able to persist in that belief.
I do also believe their relationship was entirely platonic, albeit at such an intensity (on his part at least) that I'm certain there was talk. Luckily, I've spent ten years with Thora and Solas doing the ground work for Solas having deeply intense platonic relationships that match his romantic ones for their dedication and devotion.
#she stood above the rest ( mythal )#( headcanons )#v; gods will fall but we will rise ( elvhenan )#he calls himself Pride ( about )#[ i want to write a more in depth version one day but for now you get this ]#abuse cw
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the biggest failure of tumblr's progressivism is that way too many of you engage with it as a way to Be A Good Person, as in to make the person you already are count as Morally Pure. To way, way too many of you, the language of social justice is far more a tool to puff up your petty personal squabbles with Moral Weight than it is a precise instrument by which one dissects the patterns of the world around them such that we may all better navigate our systems of oppression.
You will never be a good person. None of us will. It's not a thing that exists. When you take an action, it has consequences, and you can only control so many of those consequences. Your job isn't to be morally pure, or to hunt out as many hurtful actions in others as you can, but to learn how to move mindfully, accept your flaws, and adapt to new information or inconvenient revalations as painlessly as possible.
Stop throwing people away. That means yourself, too. A good world won't be achieved by creating a group of undesirables and throwing anyone who fails your purity test into that group. That's called jail. That's policing. You don't have to love everyone, but you need to separate your personal feelings from your political beliefs, and you need to act based on your political beliefs more than your personal feelings.
The core of it, of all of it, is that injustice is committed when someone has had their right to self-actualize stripped or inhibited by forces other human beings can control. When we talk over others, when we allow our societies to limit people's time, ability, liberty to live as they choose, when we tell people who they're allowed to be, allowed to love, what they're allowed to want, that is when injustice is committed. The only thing we as human beings should inhibit is intolerance, is others' freedom to inhibit each other in any other way than this.
You gotta learn how to be the bad guy. You gotta learn how to be wrong. You gotta learn how to feel your guilt, your fear, your hurt, your indignance, without taking it out on others. You gotta learn how to see everyone, everyone around you as complex individuals with valid, rich inner lives, as people, people who are just as present and real and whose feelings matter just as much as yours.
It's not about you. Learn to take an L. There are much more important things out there than being right or getting what you want. The world is big and scary and on fire but there's no shortcut for doing the work or understanding what's important to inernize. You have to try, and read, and look for answers yourself, and risk fucking up, and risk looking stupid, and say the wrong things, and keep trying anyways, because none of that's the end of the world.
Try to take more things in good faith. Try to ask "am i looking for a fight? Am I hunting for outrage? Is there a more charitable way to read this?" before dismissing everything you see that you don't like. Righteousness is your fucking enemy. When you use shorthand for big ideas, do it mindfully, judiciously.
Slow the fuck down. There's no shortcuts for this stuff. Be kind first and foremost. Be patient. Try to make less work for others, AND yourself; spend a little time to save others effort, ask for help if it would take you too much time.
I don't know. I wanted to make a more cohesive point. Just. Stop looking for a fight. Please. There's enough fighting already.
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My favorite comic celebrates its fifth anniversary today!
Em (@mushroomminded) has made me laugh so hard that I cry as well as burst into laughter while actively crying. MiCoVerse has been so, so fun; I have recommended it to you all time and time again. If, for whatever reason, you haven't picked it up yet, now is a great time. Things have gotten chaotic, to say the least! But the characters are near and dear to my heart, and I have it on good authority that the end is bittersweet at best.
#no idea what the end IS but. i have faith#micoverse#mushroomminded#skye draws#I’m going to try and schedule this tumblr PLEASSEEEE work with me#oh!! and before I forget: special thank you to sage for being a second set of eyes for me on this!!
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rare pairs for your consideration - starlight x discord
#my little pony#mlp#discord mlp#starlight glimmer#starcord#discoglimmer#I'm known for uhhhh strongly disliking starlight and I'm not discord's biggest fan either so#people are either gonna love this or hate it but please know my intentions are in good faith i really like this#pairing them together reminded me that i actually thought s7 was leading to a friendship between them & that we'd see them hanging out more#that didnt happen & now i remember the s7 premiere leading to nothing and now i feel cheated#didnt he want her to be his roomie? 🤔#my thing against most discord ships that arent the princesses is hes still enough of a jerkass that he needs someone wh#who wont put up with his bullshit AND matches him in power#starlight fits that perfectly and being former villians trying to make a new life tropes is something they have in common#so yea i may not be their biggest fans but i ended up genuinely liking the idea of them and how interesting their dynamic could have been#vs what we got in the show and i think their dynamic together improves them as characters enough to improve my opinion of them#basically theyre 'i could fix him' 'girl youre worse' and i like that ���
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Huh, I didn't even realize it'd been a year since BG3 came out until I opened tumblr this morning. Kinda wild. I didn't think much of the game's release: I like Larian's games, and I like the BG series. I wasn't ever going to skip the game, but I didn't think I'd play it at launch because I was busy working on a novel in 2023 and not doing well financially.
Thankfully, circumstances left me with a little bit of extra money last year just before launch and it meant I could spend on a video game. I needed a pick-me-up after said 2023 novel failed to go anywhere, and BG3 was right there. Like most CRPGs, I played it in basically every moment of free time that I had and did as much as I possibly could in one playthrough.
It's so odd how these small happenstances can snowball into coming back to fandom, finding some friends I might've never met otherwise, and writing a lot of fanfiction along the way. I'll probably have something more interesting to say/share when it's the 14th, AKA when I sat down and wrote my first fic for this fandom.
Anyways, it's been a lot of fun and I'm looking forward to more years to come 💜
#random fandom thoughts#there's a fair few tidbits about that first fic that will be more fun to share on the 14th#but there's some fun facts about the early parts of my first playthrough:#Asheera killed Us because the player thought it was going to be a hostile intellect devourer and didn't want to deal with that at lvl1 lol#It took me several hours to recruit Gale because I didn't want to interact with the glowing portal until I was “ready”#I (the player) sent Barcus flying at first because I have a very silly sense of humor#I did reload that one because Asheera wouldn't BUT I was satisfied#and finally the one that is always entertaining considering how things ended up#I originally thought nothing of Shadowheart and didn't go into the game with any idea about romance or the companions whatsoever#all I noticed about her was that she wore Sharran symbols everywhere but tried to hide her faith#then she tried the most miserable attempt at manipulation I've ever seen in my life (when she tests you about Raphael's deal)#and she exposed herself as the Worst Sharran Possible#then came her confession of her faith and I knew something special was happening#the confession sounds so robotic and prewritten almost like it's from a canned speech she's practiced and rehearsed#and sounds more like regurgitation and being Told what to believe rather than an impassioned plea borne of bone-deep faith#the sudden shift in her tone had me thinking: “this is either atrocious character writing or fantastic characterization”#and lo and behold#anyways if you've read this far then bg3 is a very special thing for me and I love getting to create for the fandom
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Thinking thoughts about Abuela being back and with this backstory about her being taken in by charlatans and Eddies whole catholic guilt thing and how the two things kind of play into one another as an exploration of faith and being taken in by something.
Abuela giving all her money to the tarot card readers etc because she was searching for something - for connection (with Abuelo) - trying to recapture what she had lost, and How Eddie has spoken about trying to re-find the magic he had with Shannon - how Eddie hasn't actually fully reconciled the Shannon of it all when it comes to relationships and how his Catholic guilt connects into that.
How Marisol as a physical representation of Catholicism is part of that narrative - how Eddie is entering a place where he has to chose his path - in order to move on from Shannon he needs to fully square the hole - catholic or non catholic. And how that needs to happen first - before he can begin his queer journey!
#this is so incoherant#I'm also thinking about how Marisol fits into this narrative and how this idea of being taken in or fooled by a person plays into what we#know of her - how she wasn't upfront with Eddie (not saying she had to be right from the off but before moving in!!!) - how she is kind of#representative of secrets - especially around faith and ones connection with faith because she is essentially a stand in for catholicism#which (sorry to all the catholics out there) peddles in magic and secrets in order to keep the mystery of faith alive and therefore keep#people believing. How Eddie's reckoning with himself and the ghost of Shannon ultimately means choosing either to follow the path of#catholicism or non catholicism#How Marisol is a tie to religion and therefore his reasons for not having successful relationships after her (or even with her) and how#Eddie letting go will ultimately mean letting go of Marisol - how he can never fully move forward while catholicism still lingers#how I don't' think we'll be seeing the queer aspect of this narrative this season - that dealing with this first part is key and only once#he has figured it out can he then be free to know himself - is true self better - and accept and move into his full self as a queer man#so yeah - catholic guilt arc 7b and 8a - as its really a two parter - finally dealing with the remnants of Shannon - and its connection wit#his faith and then when truly free of that exploring his queerness!#So yeah - Marisol will possibly be here until towards the end of the season because she is meant to be the trigger point for Eddie in#relation to Shannon - its why they made the difference (and similarities) between S and M very obvious in 7x01#they have the time to build this story arc more fully now with the s8 renewal - to do it justice and unfortunately as part of that it means#she'll probably be around longer than any of us would like!#I don't know if I even make sense at this point#but I do want to reitterate that the show is goig out of its way to contrast her with Buck as well#to really show how close and right for each other Buck and Eddie are so no one needs to panic - she's here for the narrative not forever!#911 abc#911 spoilers#eddie diaz
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the practice of taking multiple names... i do wish it was a bit more supported in places like the united states. i love my family name, my family means the world to me,
but there's also the last name of berri that i'd love to take. it was the second name that stuck with me after "mira", and i've nicknamed myself "miraberri" in a lot of things over the past year i've had it...
...i suppose the other trouble is that i've already changed my legal name once, and so now i'd have to pay for it to be changed again... ahh, the wonders of capitalism and rigid social systems.
wouldn't it be nice if we lived in a society that embraced Change?
that freely allowed, even encouraged changing oneself? embracing the fact that everything will change eventually, and must do so for things to not become stagnant?
that some things might not be right as they are, despite the state of things being comfortable for many people? that the status quo, or our time-honored traditions, aren't infallible, perfect concepts?
i guess the idea is too much for some people to understand.
maybe some day, that'll change, too.
#i've held that belief for as long as i can remember really holding beliefs about society...#it's really funny finding someone i can identify with so well- in both name and ideals- in media i wasn't expecting to#faith's the one thing i still haven't necessarily narrowed down fully in myself. like i know i'm not christian- but i'm not atheist either.#i've had an idea of what afterlife i hope for... but that doesn't really mean much if i never get to see it until the end- now does it?#i suppose if there's one thing i can believe in... it's the ability for things to change- for life to take its own path...#even if it feels like a frustrating endless cycle sometimes...#some day... something will change. it always will. and suddenly you won't feel so trapped anymore.#because if everything's a cycle... your sadness had a start to it- it'll have an end to it as well! it'll come back around!#and everyone... everyone has the power to change things for the better! for themselves- and for the world!#so... if i had to choose one god to believe in... i think it'd have to be a god of change.#so i guess... thanks in stars and time. for helping me reach a decision about faith.#if you read my little tag ramble... thank you as well.
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hm.
#if you find yourself worried that growing in faith will remove parts of your personality becayde you might suddenly lose interest in#what makes you you#thats something you really have to like Investigate. deep down. because in the end even if you change a bit you will be Better. l#like you will be where God wants you to be#the heart is deceitful above all things and desperately wicked etc#like i GET IT but also . growing in faith doesnt make you a Totally Different Person it doesnt take away all your interests#maybe it changes how you interact with them and the importance you place on them but like#me being more spiritually mature than i was a year ago doesn't mean that im not interested in poetry anymore or i dont like all the media#im invested in anymore#EVEN when i felt called to stop listening to secular music#i was like oh well ill just be boring now#no girl theres worlds out there of good music by christian artists you just gotta find it#anyways. this is rambly#i cant really make this concise#but really like. sometimes you gotta reconsider your priorities#God created you as you are WITH your personaliyy#sure we were born in sin etc but your personality being sanctified does not mean that you will lose it#yk#anyways#reminds me of this story abt a guy asking an older brother about if he should be listening to secular music#and the brother was like . ok well first off answer me this#if God told you to only listen to ska music for the rest of your life would you listen#and the guy was like ?? what??? no???#and the brother was like well then you still place your preferences higher than Gods#kind of silly and i do still think theres nuance in the music thing#but like. Yk. The Basic Idea
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i wanna know more about kyer and alisia, their designs are super cool and the stuff u said about them in tags sounds super interesting!!
AA PEOPLE BEING INTERESTED IN MY OCS
so. they're both major characters in this RPG I would really like to make someday called The Mission Of Imperium.
Basically everyone is aware of the 4th wall, Players are seen as an entity that must be summoned when the world is faced with a dilemma that ordinary heroes cannot solve.
however, Players need a vessel.
in this particular story, Kyer is The Intended Vessel. they were chosen for this role because they tend to be a pushover and thus would be easy for the Player to control.
Alisia has been Kyer's best friend since childhood, and planned to go with them and basically be the Game's deuteragonist while Kyer would be the protagonist. she doesn't trust the Player, nor does she particularly like the idea of Kyer being possessed, but she is willing to let this happen and support their decision to act as a vessel.
however, when the player tries to inhabit Kyer's body, it is revealed that they are actually unable to act as a vessel. having the Player inhabiting them causes a lot of pain and could lead to death (that the Player would not be able to respawn them from) within less than an hour if the Player is not removed from their body.
Because of this, the Player ends up switching vessels last minute, causing Alisia to become the Player's vessel. she hates this, but for the fate of the world and the fact that she seems to be doing just fine as a vessel, she ends up becoming the Game's protagonist.
aside from the main conflict of "go defeat evil and save the world", this story centers a lot around the Player being able to make whatever choices they want regardless of what Alisia and Kyer want. and boy do I have plans regarding that
#there is also the whole question of “why did the pushover not work as a vessel but the one who is actively fighting the possession is fine”#but the answer to that question is spoilers#and so are the plans#the player can wingman these two tho. the player has the freedom of making them kiss#and yeah sure there ARE happy endings but the bad ones? OUGH. MY PLANS. DOOMED BY THE PLOT.#also these guys exist purely bc I randomly had the idea of “a game where you can't control the player character sometimes” which.#deltarune has already done that with the whole kris putting theur soul in a cage thing but this is different because#imagine if you were being possessed by some entity with completely unknown intentions and everyone around you KNEW about this and was not#only completely fine with that but actually encouraging it like. “yeah you're possessed! this is a good thing!!” but the entity possessing#you has already tried to do horrible things and you dont know if you'll be able to stop them next time. and it wont let you tell people. an#even if you could tell people they'd have more faith in the entity than you and say something like “it knows what it's doing just relax”#poor Alisia is probably the most doomed by the plot out of all the characters depending on what the player decides to do#anyways yea i still have a lot of stuff to figure out about the whole story such as every single character other than these two but#yippee i like thinking about these two#the mission of imperium#tmoi
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more asoiaf comparisons, parallels & antiparallels to the first dance of the dragons vs the second & final dance of the dragons (& possibly the sixth blackfyre rebellion): the blacks being daenerys i targaryen's supporters, the golds being aegon vi targaryen's supporters, tommen baratheon being a close equivalent to gaemon palehair & his mother essie & sylvenna sand which may be interpreted as a parallel with queen cersei lannister & taena merryweather of myr, trystane truefyre being a close equivalent to aegon/young griff & perkin being jon connington & the shepherd being the new high septon the high sparrow, dalton greyjoy being euron i greyjoy's ancestor & the latter surpassing him, alyn waters later alyn velaryon resembling aurane waters later aurane velaryon & finishing what their ancestors started. history repeats itself.
#LIKE!!!! LOOK AT THE PARALLELS BRUH#it kinda makes me wonder who the hightowers would support this time...#its literally so wild how history repeats itself#i think the lannisters would support aegon after he takes king's landing bc they're lowkey fucked either way.#cersei lannister's probably either in hiding at casterly rock or will end up as aegon's political prisoner. maybe jaime too idk.#i have no idea who would lead the lannisters on the side of the golds now that kevan's dead killed by varys tho... maybe genna lannister?#cersei jaime & tyrion's aunt? to parallel johanna lannister who attacked the ironborn like a boss bitch??#i personally predict aegon'll marry sansa who would have the north the riverlands & the vale at her back—it'd be arranged by baelish & varys#i also think it's possible he'd take arianne martell as another wife to parallel aegon & his wives visenya & rhaenys.#so by taking sansa & arianne as his wives & queens both of whom are well beloved in their countries he'd restore honor to their houses.#bc aerys & later the baratheon dynasty was a terrible time for the starks & the martells so he brings the north & dorne back into the fold.#so by marrying sansa he honors & respects her given her past betrothal to joffrey & forced marriage to tyrion & mending what aerys did#particularly to her grandfather rickard stark & her uncle brandon stark & to her aunt lyanna stark.#& by marrying arianne he's restoring honor to house martell considering all the bs his mother elia martell experienced in king's landing.#(whether elia actually Is his mother or who he perceives her to be) & restoring the line of succession again in dornish hands#& they'd probably marry him on the condition that the northerners & dornish gets special rights & privileges that others don't.#& not to mention that the targaryens starks & martells have a common enemy.#polygamy's a big nono in the faith of the seven but that didn't stop aegon & his wives & im sure after everything w/ the faith rn??#w/ cersei & the sparrows?? & considering aegon's actually a decent person & he'll be foreshadowed to be popular & loved??#i don't think most would bat an eye tbh. i actually think daenerys would wanna talk to aegon first tho.#then everything & everyone around them goes to shit & they end up fighting bc like. daenerys wants SO BADLY to have a family.#so like i don't see her immediately perceiving aegon as a threat.#the starks & most of the north would prolly be wary of dany @ 1st due to aerys & having a MASSIVE army w/ three dragons until the long night#except for like. maybe jon. but anyway the martells could be slightly wary of dany bc of what happened with quentyn in meereen.#idk maybe there's a division in the north & dorne. i think sansa & arianne would actually get along personally.#anyway im presuming stannis is gonna be at the nightfort & i personally don't think he's ever gonna come south again. he'll die at the wall.#ooc.
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maybe it's time for me to move on.............
#its been two months since the end of an eight month relationship and i havent so much as looked at a hot person in that time#i mean i've got a queer event in a couple weeks and i think thats The Place to meet someone because. realistically my gender is just-#-too complicated to date a straight girl#or a gay guy#so.#i've also learned my lesson about dating people i'm close friends with because that did not work out for me at all#really i just need like. a younger reincarnation of rafael silva to appear because he is the only person who will ever live up to my-#-obviously very high standards (i would date anyone who is morally decent and dresses nice if i thought they were interested)#while we're on this matter actually people who put no effort into how they dress is such a fucking ick#i went out to this thing a few weeks ago and there was a guy my age there and he asked me to dance (it was an Old Persons party hes a-#-family friends its a long story) but he was literally in a hoodie and i was wearing like a 400$ formal outfit#like man absolutely the fuck not this is a Nice Event why are you wearing *denim* what are you DOING#is it a bad idea to go to an event with the mindset of finding someone to be with by the way? because that is kind of how i'm thinking-#-about it but at the same time if i *dont* find anyone there that i connect with then that's fine. i mean all in good time cause at some-#-point i'm going to meet someone. i have enough faith in both my religion and my own person that i will meet someone who i like and who-#-likes me it just depends when that happens. idk i just feel like all my friends in relationships atm are dating to break up but i want to-#-find the person i'm going to marry someday. because i dont want to miss a single second with someone who will be the love of my life#ughhhhh idk#wait i just realised how long these tags are. shit i'm so single lmao#txt !!
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That one post of my mine predictably aged like fine wine. Never let somebody on comic twitter in the writer's room😭😭😭 Like imagine a 1 to 1 adaptation of literally any event?? -1b at the box office. "Who are these people???"
#Anywayyy I'm writing a retelling of DC and it is honestly so fun to imagine the characters in a new but familiar light#Like the biggest reason why I was never interested in writing fanfic before 2 months ago is because I never felt like those characters were#I felt... uncomfortable writing it not because i thought fanfic was bad or anything but because I felt it was weird to write for example#“XYZ DID THIS AND DID THAT AND DID THIS” like maybe he did?? I wouldn't know I don't know him like his creator!!!#But comic characters feel like more flexible due to the many interpretations over the years but firm enough where I can decide how to take#Certain traits and minimize them or expand on them#Also 1 to 1 adaptations suck balls to write. I'm not sure if that's universal but the whole fun of writing is coming up with new ideas#Writing a straight adaptation would be kind of writing a translation into a new medium. Which isn't bad. Novelization are literally those#But a common sentiment among writers I've seen is that Novelizations aren't that fun either unless you get to experiment either#Adapting comics into a new format and retelling them is kind of hell because you have all these intersecting plotlines and insane events#That's just tangled up in a story with a timeline that literally makes its contradictions into plot lines. But it's FUN coming up with ways#To condense a character's origin and sort of rewire it into the story you want to tell. Because yeah I think a lot of people miss is#that at end of the day#you tell stories about people and their struggles. You need to find a way to fit those moments of joy sadness love.#Like a movie about Jason Todd being RH will never be emotional as Jason Todd dying because you'll have less time to feel the love and pain#that Bruce felt for him. Like sure#flashbacks and exposition but that can only go so far. At the end of the day#It will always be about RH vs Batman. That's what people came to see. But that's not all Jason is. He was Robin before he was RH. A 1 to 1#Adaptation will never translate that to screen. Plus you (sadly) have shared universes now and a movie can only jump around in time so much#For example in my fic if I wanted to add Tim and faithful to his source material I would need to add so MUCH about Jason death#About like Bruce grieving without skipping all over that and missing the human element. It would severely mess up pacing.#I don't know i love how adaptations can make you see the characters in a new light or elevate the source material#Iwtv my beloved doesn't adapt the books exactly but reimagined in it a way that I like much more#Anyway this proves my point about comic fans being weirdly childish and omfg I hate to use this term...anti intellectual 😮💨😮💨😮💨#Everyone who writes or yknow reads should like understand this on a fundamental level. One to one adaptations are safe but boring.#Like the Psycho remake was bad not because it made bad changes but it barely made any changes.#Anyway watch amc iwtv to understand good adaptations better than your average comic stan on twtter#Not a rant I just love discussing adaptations#Long tags
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