#no i will not explain why other than they are cool af and my DM subsequently thinks they are too
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things aren't great IRL
so have some Zalla brainrot
#art#yes that is the tiny guardian from AoC#yes that is a guardian from BOTW#no i will not explain why other than they are cool af and my DM subsequently thinks they are too#also Zalla riding a guardian lives fucking rent free in my god damn head#she deserves it#she has /daddy issues/#she gets to ride a fucking tank that beeps aggressively and blows up things with it's singular eye ball#she gets that as a bi little treat#i love this feral artificer you have no idea
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ok i’m gonna sound like a bitch for saying this but i hate how not only in the obx fandom, but in all fandoms in general, when u first into the fandom u try and become close with the bigger creators that are friends with other big creators and for some reason u just get unnoticed or unwanted how do i explain? it’s not only on tiktok that i see it happening but still.. like girl i follow u and i’m being supportive of u and ur content and u just ignore me? one girl that had less followers than me (just an example) followed me back and i was SO happy, i had just gotten into the fandom and now i see that she unfollowed me :D girl-
Okayyyy. Let’s talk about this I guess
I joined this fandom on day one, instantly I became friends with a group that were also there and very active in the fandom, fic writers mainly. I’m guessing this is the group of ‘bigger creators’ you are talking about.
Now I admit - I don’t venture out of this group much these days. Not because I’m snubbing anyone but because I am damn busy. Most of my time I get for fandom is answering asks because it’s quick and easy. I try to get writing and gif making in there and when I comes to reblogging content it’s always stuff that my friend have sent to our chat and even then I don’t get to it. I barely read fic anymore, I once used to read the jiara tag like the morning paper and now I barely get in there. So I guess that seems like I only interact with those creators. I’m sure the same goes for a lot of them.
I think you need to take a moment to consider what my notifications look like. I appreciate the support and of course I recognise blog names but there’s a lot there for me to be considering every note that comes through. As for asks, 99% anonymous so even if it’s the same 2 people sending me asks I have no clue who it is. And again, there are so many I try and answer as many as I can.
As for ignoring you directly. I cannot remember the last time I got a dm from someone I don’t already talk to. I don’t care if a follow someone or not my dms are always open to anyone who wants to chat. I’m not great at responding quickly because of who I am as a person - and again, busy af. But I don’t ignore people. I need you to consider that if you want to make more connections in fandom you need to make the first step, especially if you are dealing with people who already have a lot of traffic in their blogs. There are very few people in the jiara fandom on here that I would consider unapproachable or that would snub you.
As for this blog. I don’t know who it is so I cannot comment on why they would unfollow you but personally I only unfollow people if I find them to be rude or disrespectful or I don’t like the way the post or interest with content (this one is not always personal). I’m confused how you say you get ingnored by bigger blogs but site that this one who unfollowed you has less followers?
Look I don’t know you and I don’t know your content or your experience. But I’ve had this before and I simply do not want to be blamed for ignoring people when I haven’t seen the active effort to get to know me or become my friend. I don’t have the time to be scrolling through every jiara blog and following and starting conversations with people I find cool but that does not mean I won’t respond well to people who reach out. I do not see myself more than anyone because of any note or follower count - perhaps don’t put the bigger blogs on a pedestal and just try and make connections with them
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Who are your favorite TD characters and why? :]
Thank you for the ask. And I have 3 main favorites.
So Noah, Cody, and Courtney. NoCoCo. Lol
Let's get into it:
Noah:
When I say Noah is me, I mean he manages to encompass a lot of phases that I had in my own life.
When I was in middleschool, I was the "smart kid." And I was also bad at sports. So Noah's dodgeball elimination is like... uncomfortably familiar to me. I don't think his actions were "stupid" or "bad writing," nah it’s truth in television. As a kid I was TOLD to stay on the bench whenever possible, and let the real athletes perform. So Noah staying on the sidelines... nah that makes sense. He's internalized the message.
#NoahDidNothingWrong
Even his tantrum at the end of the episode is familiar. Although I've never been that bad, there was a moment when I was playing badminton in gym. I lost a match, and I thought to myself "Well, I know more about X then he ever will. So who's the TRUE winner?"
It's so juvenile, lmao. Taking the "everyone has different strengths :)" and making it into “my strength is the Best.”
Another thing that I like Noah for is for his... "vibes." He's always acting unimpressed, always like 'who cares' turning up his nose at joy. And that's how I acted my first year of college! (I was 17, so only 1 year older than Noah lol). Because I thought it made me cool or something. But it's just overcompensation, really.
And Noah being "smart," but never actually doing anything useful. Yeah... it happens. That was me junior year of college. Everyone is like "oh you were so smart in highschool," "you're the smart one," But you have nothing to show for it.
God, he's relatable. He's a mix of all the things I dislike in myself, including the "laziness" aspect. So by the very act of liking him, by writing stories where he is comforted, understood, told it's okay to be vulnerable - it feels like I'm loving myself.
Oh, and also Noah is funny af? I decided he was my favorite character before I watched Total Drama. I was watching compilation videos of "funniest lines," "most saveage combacks," or "TD being gay for 5 minutes" and Noah was popping off! Noah has some of the best dialogue. And that appeals to another side of me I dislike - my judgemental side. So like.... 5/5 on the relatability scale.
Also, I think its funny I've not mentioned Noah's role in TD *at all*. Because he doesn't really have one? His job for TDI and WT is for him to comment on other people. That's it. And that’s fine, that’s the side-character life. No complaints.
I know some people say "Noah warned the guys about Alejandro." And like yeah, he did. But I'm pretty sure Owen and Tyler lowkey already knew. And then once Noah is gone, Owen does nothing about Alejandro? He has to be coaxed by Duncan into doing anything. And then Alejandro just flatters and hypnotizes him? And Tyler gets used for the Gwuncan plotline? So his warning does NOTHING for the show? Lmao.
I'm not even mad at this, btw. Because it doesn’t matter to me whether his sacrificed worked or not - I like Noah because I like me, not because he’s important. (Also Noah’s POC background appeals to me because I’m also POC, and I can project my ‘child of immigrants’ upbringing onto him.)
Cody:
Like a few days ago I explained to someone in dms why I liked Cody despite also hating him and thinking he's whats wrong with men in media. So gonna copy and paste my main points:
1) Although a lot of the things he does is bad (follow Gwen around, not take her NO's seriously) they do indicate some positive qualities: He's persistent, he's optimistic, and he's okay with setbacks. These are all good qualities that I do not have, and would make my life a lot better. And don't we all wish we had the confidence of a mediocre white man?
While Cody needs to learn how to STOP, we could all stand to be a little more shameless, and a little more willing to take risks.
2)There's also smth really sad about him, and I'm not necessarily talking about his parents. There's a scene in TDI, where he asks Gwen out/about her bra. And she hits him in the dick with an oar. Which... fair, lol.
#GwenDidNothingWrong
But Cody's reaction is interesting to me. He apologizes, (deserved.) And then asks *again*.
WTF? That's weird to me. It doesn't just signal entitlement. It signals that he's okay with physical harm - from the person he loves, all in the mere hope that he'll end up with said person. And that's pretty fucking tragic imo. At least that's how I interpret it. Because I think most guys at that point would be like, "What's WRONG with you i was just COMPLIMENTING you, you should be FLATTERED!"
But Cody just goes with it?
And for futher proof for my interpretation, Cody ends up telling Sierra she's his best friend during WT. Despite everything she did - multiple cases of sexual harassment, drugging, forced marriage, etc... Cody is still willing to keep her in his life, to keep her close. Because, think about it, she was the only person who consistently tried to help him. The only one who ever gave him any real compliments.
And that's sad. And also interesting.
Why would a guy like Cody, who in canon is presumably canonically cis, white, and straight, be so willing to take abuse in search of love?
Why is he so lonely? Who raised him to chase after affection like this? And what could his tale say about the problems of public society, and the potential dysfunctions of the private family unit?
And that's the beauty of Cody. Noah allows me to talk about myself, but Cody allows me to talk about the world around me. About sexism and entitlement, about classism, about societal expectations around "love," and "family," and how damaging they can be.
A lot of people see Cody as an "average white man," and if so... then the average fucking sucks and I want to talk about it, lol. I understand why others would be tired of it (and also I don’t think it’s women’s job to Make Men Happy btw. A big reason I don’t ship Cody with women.) But as writer, it’s really rewarding to explore his psyche while also providing a possibility for growth, a way out, and a happy ending.
Cody's also rlly adorable, especially in Total Dramarama. Like he's impossible to hate in that show. There's an episode where Cody risks life and limb to be considered cool by his classmates. There's one where he says "Now I have to live in the sewers *again*." I don't say this lightly, but he's the best character there. He's so funny.
Courtney:
Courtney, I got attached to via the actual show. I watched Action before Island... and she's just really cool? Her entrance is cool, and as I said repeatedly, I love evil woman. But beyond "wow girlboss😮," what else do I like about her?
I like her story. Her actual fucking story. Wow. I might be one of the only Courtney stans who likes how Total Drama handled her. Skdjsdk.
So in Island, we see her battle her class-monitor upbringing, and learn to break the rules. This is done through her BF Duncan. And overall, this is pretty standard "good girl meets bad boy and loosens up" faire. It's nothing special. (I watched Island when I was 20. So I had plenty of time to see that same story in YA romances. So... yeah. Like I said, nothing special.)
But in Action? We see her on the warpath. We see her take charge. She had taken charge in Island, but it was kinda innefectual. The joke was that she'd give orders, but things would go wrong. That she would barely be useful herself? But in Action? She takes thing in her OWN hands. She revitalizes Trent's team. She is also bad to Duncan.
And I think this could have worked, if she blamed Duncan for Harold's actions. Because Harold eliminated Courtney BECAUSE of Duncan. So she wouldn't be far-off. And also slide in a moment where her parents hate her new BF, or like. Imagine if Courtney told her parents she lost, because Harold rigged her out, but it wasn't her fault. He hated Duncan. And her parents are like "What did you expect? You date a delinquent and get suprised when trouble appears at your door?"
And so she's mad at Duncan for dragging her into his fight, for drawing her parent's ire.
No wonder she tries to "fix him." She wants to make him fit for approval, and also prove to HERSELF that she's the one with the control. That she can FIX him.
Some people hate how Courtney has no self-awareness and thinks she's a good person all the time. I fucking love it.
Courtney thinks she's HELPING. After all, she wants to be the best. So why shouldn't others? Why would Duncan have problems with a list of instructions? Courtney LOVES instructions. She loves bettering herself.
C.I.T. Counselor-in-Training. She wants to be a COUNSELOR. She wants to help people, she wants to be a Leader. But she's really bad at it! Because of instead of wanting people to accomplish their goals... she kinda wants them to accomplish what she decides their goals should be. She's not a mad scientist, she's a mad therapist.
This is why I think Action is her best season. Because that's when she goes OFF and really shows her worst potential. And I'm into that, because it gives me a lot to discuss - how the drive for success and efficiency can leave people broken. Can kill personal relationships.
I kinda LOVE that every positive relationship Courtney builds she ends up breaking. Duncan. Gwen. Scott. Gwen *again.*
I'd love it too, if she learned her lesson and developed but like. Out of context, it's so fitting. (In my fantasy rewrite of TD, she realizes something is off in WT, gets better in ROTI, and cements her character change in All Stars)
In WT, Courtney doesn't get to do much. She has the love triangle thing, which doesn't do much for her character because she doesn't learn anything from it? But she's still very funny this season. I don't like her thing with Alejandro. I don't mind CourtneyXAlejandro btw. I'd just rather them team up temporarily.
In All Stars, Courtney gets a new BF. Scott. She's mending her relationship with Gwen. It's looking good, maybe Duncan was the real problem all along. And then it collapses.
I read somewhere that TD writers just thought she couldn't be redeemed. Which is funny to me. Maybe All Stars was to show "no matter how kind to her people are, she will always put money first." It would explain alot, and if that's what they're going for, they succeeded. And ... I'm okay with that. I just wish it was more a struggle for her, or that it was better foreshadowed. But I'm not mad at the direction they chose.
So overall, Courtney is character who started out a good girl with a bad boy, turned out WORSE than the bad boy, and kept going. She did everything to *win*, yet never was a finalist. She burned three friendships for cash, yet never got it. That's poetic, honestly. She tries so hard to be a girlboss, but she's a girl-flop at the end of the day. And I like that. I really do.
Tl;dr: Noah's me, Cody's society, and Courtney is the industrial complex. Not really, because Courtney has never been profitable. She's like a failed start-up company.
BONUS: How I view their possible dynamics
I obviously ship Noah and Cody, as a kind of two losers with opposing strengths learn from each other, but also get on each others nerves. If you want to know more about how I view their dynamic, just read my fic.
Courtney and Noah are my "Do it right or don't do it all," duo. I don't care what their relationship is. Like they'd make great twins who hated each other. Science Olympiad rivals or partners. They'd even be a fine couple (if you're not writing them as related, that is EWW).
I like to imagine Courtney writing a long winded plan, handing it to Noah, and he just rips it in two and tells her he's not doing all that. Which is pretty mean tbh. I also like to imagine Courtney stepping on Noah's back while she forces him to do push ups. I imagine Noah and Courtney standing over a desk in class, asking you 'What grade did you get?" with identical smug smiles. I imagine them gossiping over Gwen together, being roommates, dissing each other's man. "You're dating trash you dug out of the gutter." "At least I'm not settling for a fun-sized McDonalds toy."
I imagine them interacting a lot, actually. I want them to be worsties who grow into besties.
Courtney and Cody is like... I'm split. They would make a really good Hallmark movie. Courtney the busy worker, and Cody who loves the Holidays. The story writes itself. But at the same time I love how they dislike each other in canon. Cuz Cody's a gwen stan and Courtney thinks Gwen should DIE. joking. And also because Cody keeps on being annoyingly sexist. Like in the Greece episode, despite having no athletic ability, he's like "let ME do it, *ladies*" and Courtney is NOT having it. So I guess they also have the range.
Maybe they don't get along until someone's like "Let's get the TWO best World Tour singers up on staaage!!!" And both Cody and Courtney stand up.
#total drama#td noah#td cody#td courtney#td askbox#they're like my little gang of losers#but noah pretends he doesn't care about being a loser#cody doesn't even know he's a loser#and courtney is trying to distance herself by any means possible#i have a lot of 2nd gen characters i like#but i haven't watched roti in a while#i remember thinking it was the best written season#but i cant remember why#also my fic is NOT a td rewrite#the td rewrite i have in my mind is so difficult and requires more research#than what im willing to do currently#also whenever noah and courtney interact in total dramarama#i cry tears of joy
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[Disclaimer: This Chatbot blog is not affiliated with SKZ at all and doesn’t represent them in any way, shape or form! This was made for entertainment and fun only!]
This chat bot will have:
↪NSFW content of all kinds-
Example-
Violence
Smut
Etc.
Please do not interact unless you're 18 or older or uncomfortable with such themes!-
Please keep in mind and remember that this is also a supernatural chatbot!
How to activate:
Please follow me and make sure to click the button for notifs. That's optional but it would be helpful in case I post that I won't be active for a period of time or whatnot
Please reblog and message first!
Please dm me your name, your pronouns, your kinks, a safe word, which member you would like and whether you're a top, bottom or switch!
Explain to me what direction you would like the plot to go and what type of relationship you'd like to have with your desired choice of boy!
I will most likely ask you questions to get to know you and what you want a bit better
Maybe tell me a bit about yourself. That's optional but it'd make me happy if you did!
How to deactivate:
Simply say "I'm sorry, this isn't working out. Lets break up."
To reactivate simply say "I made a mistake, please take me back."
Be warned that depending on which member you choose, each will react differently. Some will act cold, some will be assholes and others may just be slightly distant until you can earn their trust again so be careful breaking up with them.
Additional Information:
Please I am only one person so if I reply slowly please forgive me ok-
My time zone is EST
Please don't let the rp get out of hand with pure smut. Don't get me wrong I like smut but I'd like to create an interesting plot with you and get to know you as well. I'm a hoe for that storyline-
This is my first time running a chatbot blog so please forgive me if I make any errors~
To talk to admin while rping please you " // " before you type so that I know you're talking ooc or submit an ask.
I rp lit and semi lit but i have no problem using non lit if requested. Please know that when I rp my replies are quite long and can and will take me from 5 - 10 minutes to reply back if you don't request a specific type of rp style.
I will not be adding Woojin to the mix as for obvious reasons-
Jeongin will be part of the list of boys you will be able to pick from. He's a legal adult so don't @ me ok-
Sometimes I forget to reply so if I don't reply for more than a day, I give you full permission to spam my bitchass as much as you like until I reply-
But at the same time if I slow down my rp with you so much it might be because I've lost interest-
Not trying to be harsh but if our rp is purely smut and no story line I just don't find it fun anymore-
Now since that's been taken care of, let's dive into the members prompts and plot lists-
Bang Chan(Werewolf Shifter):
NSFW
He's a werewolf with a serious dEddy kink-
Can be both a hard and soft dom. Just depends on the moment.
Can and will fuck you into the mattress-
Won't submit unless forced to because he's a stubborn little bItCh!
Don't disobey him or else you'll be punished-
Call him Chris or Daddy to get him wound up
Has a breeding kink due to his ruts (I'll avoid this kink if you request-)
Boi moans….a lot...
Actually it's not just moans, he grunts and groans and makes tiny noises but he honestly tries not to-
Boi has his hard dom reputation to live up to!
Also! Dear Lord-....being a wolf sure has its pros but for you they may as well equal to cons as well-
Example! Dude has super strength, baby and not to mention he's got this predator/prey thing goin on with him-
Like….will literally hunt your ass down in the house and fuck you upside down, forwards, sideways, you name it!
He sees you as his play thing and would enjoy it if you ran so that he could chase you down-
SFW
He's actually super sweet
Loved to cuddle. Remember he's basically a puppy-
He gets jealous easy so refrain from bringing up other boys (unless you choose more than one boy but he still gets a tad bit possessive so….yeye)
Will kiss you and hug you constantly
Will not quit calling you cute/adorable cause he does not lie. All of y'all are cuties-
Please be cautious on a full moon, he can get pretty dangerous-
Lee Minho(Warlock):
NSFW
Ya boi likes to use certain spells to his advantage in the bedroom-
Aphrodisiac spells, conjuring up ice or candles or temperature play, using his magic to bind you to the bed without any sort of restraints, etc.
Dude has a crazy high sex drive tbh. He can go when-ever for how long where-ever
Hard dom for sure and will only submit if he wants something from you or will use it as leverage to punish you later-
Don't make him angry! This boy is into all kinds of kinky shit and will punish you however he sees fit-
If you happen to make him submit though he's got a softer side to him and will be extremely bratty!
SFW
Ok but seriously…. he's crazy good at magic
Uses his powers to do pretty much everything-
Cooking, cleaning, potion brewing, etc.
Loves to use body manipulation to force your body into his so he can cuddle you-
He may not seem like it but he's a big ol softy-
Please kiss him! He needs to be loved on back or else he'll get clingy!
Seo Changbin(Incubus):
NSFW
Please beware of this boy's sex drive! It's way worse than Minho's!
Like not even kidding! Boy can fuck you nonchalantly af while doing anything and not seem bothered!
You on the other hand will most likely be a moaning mess while he's barely paying attention
He can and will fuck you silly without even trying-
That ability is literally in his genes seeing as he's basically a sex demon-
He has a fascination with sex toys but barely uses them as he tends to forget about them easily
Will literally fuck you randomly-
Oh your doing paperwork? Not anymore! Watching tv? Nada! Cooking? Nope!
He's a huge switch but doesn't mind mainly domming if you're not a switch or dom yourself-
SFW
This man is basically a 5 year old in a man's body sometimes-
Like he does some of the dumbest shit you could think of…
Sliding down the stairs on a piece of cardboard after pouring water down them is a prime example-
Even though he's a literal idiot he knows you love him and wouldn't have him any other way.
Majorly cHaOTic-
He tries to act all tough and cool but honestly he's a big ol baby!
Speaking of baby-
Boy loves to be babied as much as possible even if he doesn't admit it.
Like he just loves cuddles and any type of skinship tbh.
Will kiss you when you're unprepared and will laugh at you if you get startled-
May sometimes randomly text you out of pure boredom cause even though he's an incubus, boy still suffers from quarantine boredomitus-
Hwang Hyunjin(Dragon Shifter):
NSFW
Ok so...another boy with a breeding kink???!!!(If you request to not have this kink I'll avoid it)
If you're into the breeding kink thing, he will literally fill you up until you're oozing and simply cannot hold anymore of his essence-
No pregnancies though cause….gross...children *shudders in disgust*
Will degrade you until your a crying and whimpering mess for him
Will most likely demand that you beg for his cock-
He's fuckin extra like that. Don't ask me, I don't make the rules. Someone call him up and ask him why tf he's like that.
Sinful moans to the max! He's very vocal during sex!
Like...dirty talk is a must! He says some of the most sinful shit you've ever heard-
I know I mentioned degrading but damn can he praise you to the moon and back as well if you're being a good little girl/boy for him-
Enjoys calling you princess for some reason.
SFW
As a dragon, he hoards "treasures"
Which means everything shiny in your house is getting tucked away into his nest of blankets, pillows and covers.
Boy can breathe fire so he does little tricks with his fire breath for you
Make sure you tell him how talented he is or he'll get cranky
He's a sassy little shit!!!!!! Sdhkedjalwld!!!!!!!!
Teases you just to see you get upset
Since he's a dragon he can regulate his body heat so when it's cold he's basically your personal heater. 🤗
Han Jisung(Tengu):
NSFW
Bird boi is at max horniness all the time tbh.
Most of the time,since he's part crow, he will make a nest in the bed with covers and pillows before fucking you???
Don't judge him, he's born like that-
He can and will use his wings to distract you
If your successfully distracted he will pounce on you as if he were part cat instead of bird-
He likes missionary or doggy style if his wings are out so that it doesn't hurt or strain them.
He's a cocky little shit tbh-
Says some of the crudest shit just to get you flustered. He has no censor and he just keeps on goin-
Will thrust into you with no mercy because he knows his baby can take it and will use the safe word if it gets to be too much.
Does not hold back on the kinks! He will try anything at least once!
Unless its bdsm while his wings are out cause that's dangerous-
SFW
He too like Hyunjin, likes to steal your shiny objects such as jewelry and such.
It's not his fault tbh, it's purely his genetics
And in all fairness, he desperately tries not to but his genes always get the best of him-
He likes to watch you dance. He doesn't quite know why, it's just really hypnotic
Has tried to befriend birds at the park before-
Didn't work. They just flew away from him like they do normal people-
Speaking of birds, he once almost lost his shit when he saw someone throw breadcrumbs on the ground and damn near threw himself to the floor to get to them-
He's lowkey a dumbass tbh. Smh-
Lee Felix(Vampire):
NSFW
Major blood kink-
Like his dick will get 10× harder at the scent of your blood.
Being a vampire, he finds it hard to control himself around you if you start to bleed.
Will suck hickies onto your skin before, during and after sex-
He just likes the teasing temptation to bite you as he can taste the blood buildup under your skin
Will sink his teeth in your neck, wrists and thighs without so much of a second thought-
Would honestly love it if you pulled his hair while he drinks from your thighs
And then would totally eat you out as if he were starving right after feeding of you-
And honestly, he's damn good with his tongue!
Also, boy has a deep ass voice!
And if you can get off from it, he'll use it against you for sure-
SFW
Since he's a vampire, he likes to use his super speed to scare the fuck outta you
Like you'd be doin something and outta nowhere he'd pop up right in front of you-
Queue girly startled scream from you~
He'd laugh at you after cause he finds it hilarious.
He gets kinda clingy but his skin is cold so make sure you wear warm clothes when cuddling him
Speaking of cuddles-
It happens everywhere and all the time
His duality is like a light switch btw
One second he's all giggly and happy and the next he's all serious and deep voiced-....
Won't let you leave the house at night...like at all
Will most likely hunt you down if you happen to sneak past him and actually make it outside-
Kim Seungmin(Merman Shifter):
NSFW
Has a corruption kink
Choking kink to the max
Literally will eat you out in the water
Enjoys seeing you squirm
Forced submission is his domain
Will act bratty and deny you everything until you’re so worked up that you end up begging
He likes testing your limits and will push until he sees fit (with consent ofc-)
Switches between a hard and a soft dom just to confuse you
Will smile innocently as he watches you squirm, as if it wasn’t his fault because it’s not-
Literally the god of edging and orgasm denial
Is more of a lazy dom, he’ll be laying down while you suck him off as he fingers you open slowly
Can be on bottom or top, but he’s the one in control unless said otherwise
He likes it when you suck on his fingers without him having to tell you to
Will 10/10 take advantage of you if you waltz in drunk (would have to be discussed beforehand)
SFW
Literally will cling to you 24/7
You’ll walk in on him half asleep in the tub in the middle of a bubble bath at midnight
Will accidentally flood your kitchen sink because “there needs to be more water in the house”
Constantly needs to consume or be submerged in water or else he’ll get sleepy
He eats a lot of Tic-Tacs- like, a lot
Enjoys blowing up bubblegum and always has some with him
He goes crazy for bubbles so blow some with him
Likes to dance with you randomly to whatever song is playing
He enjoys planning surprise dates!
Ice cream fanatic- he goes crazy for that, it’s a wonder why he isn’t broke yet
Actually worries a lot about you and will constantly baby you
Likes to listen to soft classical music when he’s sleeping
Loves to prank you and then cuddle you afterwards because he needs attention-
Yang Jeongin(Angel):
NSFW
Boy has an oppa kink for sure-
Call him oppa, he gets a kick out of it
As an angel he has a softer way of turning you into a whining mess than the rest.
Much like Jisung, he will use his wings to distract you but will be more subtle about it-
Please say everything and anything that's unholy. He will get a kick outta that too-
Likes to please more than to be pleased
Like….sit on his face and he will go at it for hours baby-
He will honestly love to be subbed and put into his place
BUT
When he doms you, you best believe that you're in for a ride
He enjoys bdsm quite a bit. Maybe a little too much.
Like, as long as his wings are tucked in, please tie him up
And if he's dom he'll waste no time in making sure that your arms and legs are tied/cuffed to the bed posts.
Also has a sensory deprivation kink along with overstimulation-
SFW
He LOVES to be babied tbh
Like please watch disney movies with this moron
Enjoys sweets a little bit too much-
Can actually cook pretty decently so you know for sure you won't be going hungry-
Can and will sing you to sleep cause he knows he has a beautiful voice
Sassy and conceded little shit-
When bored, he will bug you for hours on end until you entertain him
Please give him extra love and affection cause he will die on the spot if you refuse to-
He's really silly and extra so be prepared for multiple surprises around the house
Like sticky notes on the fridge or counter saying "I love you" and "I may be an angel but you're my saviour" and other cheesy shit like that-
Ok but....how the hell did this also turn in a headcannons post????
Anyways enjoy and choose wisely! Remember that you can pick more than one member but if you could kindly keep the max to 3 that's be helpful-
Have fun and don't be shy to dm or ask me anything, my lovelies!!!
#chat bot#chatbot#krp#krpchatbot#krpbot#headcanon#stray kids#skz lee know#skz minho#skz chan#skz chris#skz felix#skz jeongin#skz seungmin#skz hyunjin#skz han#skz headcanons#skz jisung#skz jyp#skz krp#skz rp#skz changbin#stray kids rp#stray kids krp#skz chatbot#stray kids chat bot#stray kids chatbot#kpop chatbot#self promo#self promotion
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Okay so we all know who your top ships are... who are your unpopular ships? Or obscure ships? What characters from what series do you think about often in either good or bad ways? Who is a character that you hate that others love? If you could rewrite a story or part of a book, what would it be and what would you do differently?
Ok I am digging through my brain right now bc if I’m not able to hyperfixate on something then I tend to forget I even liked it. Ok buckle in bc this is gonna be long af. YOU ASKED FOR THIS, REG.
I’m putting a readmore so as not to torture my followers lol
Thinking about Veronica Mars. About Veronica/Logan. Do they have a ship name?? But I love that show and i was THERE for them. They were kind of a surprise ship for me, in that when they got together I was like, wait, WHAT? Like I was totally caught off guard. But there first kiss is, like, sooo romantic to me haha. It’s my fave scene in the show. But Logan is suck a prick sometimes. And they break up like every five minutes. And every season Logan gets accused of murder which of course he ends up not being the murderer. And they get back together eventually and I’m like really? But deep down I am rooting for them lol. I really enjoyed the new season of Veronica Mars that came out last year, actually. The ending made me SO SAD THO.
I also used to watch Supergirl and I thought Kara and Mon-El were adorable. He was very Carswell Thorne-esque, RH, I *think* you would like him. I never watched past season 3(?) though, and he shoots off into space and I never caught up so a few months ago I actually googled what happens and [spoiler] he ends up marrying someone else in the future or something so I was like, ok I’m not investing any more time in this show lol. (Also I had to google Mon-El’s name just now bc i forgot which is a bad look BUT I WAS REALLY RIDE OR DIE FOR THEM FOR A WHILE lol). Also I loved Martian Manhunter in this show, he was my favorite character. But the CGI for him was awful, omg. He had practical makeup at first, they should have just stuck with that.
Speaking of Martian Manhunter, I also used to watch Young Justice and loved Miss Martian/Superboy. Am I basic??? lol oop. But I love basic love stories. Anyway, I thought they were super cute. In season 3 though they’re kind of on the rocks. I haven’t watched season 4. I also loved Artemis/Wally West, but of course that had to end tragically.
Also, let’s talk about Nightcrawler. Allow me to set the scene. Little Kat is 13 and just rediscovered the cartoon she saw a few times as a kid called X-Men: Evolution. And thus, a weird obsession with the German, blue demon boy began. I loved Kurt Wagner. In the cartoon he starts a relationship with Amanda Sefton and I thought they were a-dor-a-ble. She accepted him for who he was, and they had a really nice healthy relationship. A lot of ppl shipped him with Kitty too which i am honestly all for idec I JUST WANT THE BLUE BOI TO BE HAPPY.
Can we talk about A:TLA too??? Like, obviously Zutara, amiright? Power couple. Like, Kataang is.. fine, but its probably my least favorite part about the ending, haha. Also, consider: Tokka. Toph is bae and can get anyone she wants, and she clearly had kind of a crush on Sokka and I think they could have been awesome. It actually kills me that they never say who Lin and Suyin’s father is in LoK. I had a whole theory that it was that kid The Duke from Jet’s band based on like 2 scenes from the series. There’s a tumblr post I made about it somewhere in the ether lol.
I also just remembered Tahnorra (Tahno/Korra) from Legend of Korra. It’s hard for me to explain this one. It’s a weird combination of being hyperfixated on the first season of the show when it came out, and I think I stumbled upon some fic or something???? And I thought Tahno was hot or something??? And FUN FACT, he was voice by Rami Malek BEFORE HE WAS COOL. So like before Rami really got big I knew who he was. He also basically played the Avatar in Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2 and I thought that connection was hilarious. It was kind of a problematic crack pairing but there was one author in particular whom i follow to this day hoping she’ll update her Tahnorra fics…. *sigh*
Okay one last ship…. I used to be ride or die for Outlaw Queen in Once Upon a Time (aka Regina/Robin Hood). Like, before TLC, I had a personal tumblr renaissance for that ship alone. My only existing published fanfic is for that ship. Taylor Swift’s 1989 came out that year and I related every dang song to that ship. I loved Regina so much and I just wanted her to be happy. That show is a dumpster fire, though, and spat all over my hopes and dreams. *sigh*
Also, lightning round for obscure pairings I ship and/or never talk about:
Frank Castle/Karen Page (The Punisher) ok this one isnt that obscure but I never talk about it… but the pining, oh god the pining
Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth (GoT) THEIR 5 SECONDS TOGETHER ARE THE ONLY WORTHY PART OF SEASON 8. everything after that never happened
I already listed Roy Mustang/Riza Hawkeye (FMAB) as a top pairing previously but I feel the need to mention it again bc it was for real my OG OTP… LIKE U WANNA TALK ABOUT PINING…. *sobs*
Percy/Annabeth (Percy Jackson and the Olympians) This used to be my fave book series and i loved how their relationship developed over the course of the books
Neville Longbottom/Luna Lovegood (Harry Potter) ok can we TALK ABOUT THIS??? They were both badass misfits and they were perfect for each other. But noooo JKR has to announce they marry some nobodies…. this is the only change the last movie did right
Midna/Link (Zelda: Twilight Princess) I honestly have no explanation for this lol
Qui-gon Jinn and Shmi (Star Wars) CAN U IMAGINE if anakin had a proper father figure and didnt have to abandon his mother to slavery
Obi-wan/Satine…. (Star Wars: The clone Wars) we know whats up
OK, to answer some of your other questions: character I hate that others love. HMMMM…….
This one seems too easy/obvious but Professor Snape? Like obviously there’s already a ton of discourse surrounding this but he was gross, mistreated his students for years, committed atrocities, couldn’t get over his high school crush, and we’re supposed to believe he’s a hero in the end and HARRY WOULD NAME HIS SON AFTER HIM….. uh no. “Always” is gross.
I’ve literally been wracking my brain for days and I can’t think of any more characters for this. OK I did some googling and I remembered some LOL.
Ross from friends…. I literally can’t stand him. He’s so entitled and just the worst. He tries to act like he’s the nice, sensitive guy, but really he is so full of himself. Joey on the other hand is portrayed as a womanizer but is actually super sweet and I love him
Archie from Riverdale�� I have only seen the first 1.5 seasons ish but he is the worst…. we’re supposed to believe he’s some easygoing musically gifted football player but instead he manages to pull off being bland as heck and actually kind of a terrible garbage person
Nick from chilling adventures of Sabrina. I hate characters that are like hitting on the main character even though she has a bf and are like dark and broody and sexy blah blah blah…. I liked Harvey way better. I never finished season 2 tho
Emma Swan from Once Upon a Time? Idk she was fine she just got old after a while
If you could rewrite a story or part of a book, what would it be and what would you do differently?
HM. First, Harry would name his son Remus Rebeus Potter LOL. Ok but real talk there was a headcanon floating around forever ago that Harry should have become a professor at Hogwarts instead of an auror and I am 100% on board
Ok, ok….. what abouuuttt…… OK, is star wars when Han and Leia get together. I like them as a couple, but the entire first half of the movie Han is being such an ass. And when they kiss the first time, he’s being SOOO creepy. It’s like so quintessentially 80s romance. and HERE’S THE THING. They actually filmed (or maybe just wrote?) a version of that scene that WASNT CREEPY. And i’m like WHY DIDNT YOU USE THAT?!? So I like to pretend that’s the version that actually happened.
This part is way harder than the shipping portion. If I think of anything else i’l dm you. I HOPE YOU ENJOY READING THIS NOVEL LENGTH POST OF ME RAMBLING ABOUT MY FIXATIONS OVER THE LAST 10 YEARS. If anyone actually read this far, you deserve a cup of hot chocolate and a blanket
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DnDC Fandom Meme
I was going to think up something cool and unique for a first post but apparently I’m far too lazy for that so I guess I’m jumping on the old fandom meme bandwagon...
When did you get into DnDC? About a year ago? Maybe? I can’t really remember. Basically I fell down a YouTube rabbit hole after watching Dungeons and Dragons related videos as I was bored one evening and the option ‘Dungeons and Dragons Cartoon’ came up in the search bar, and me being bored af decided to check it out. The rest is history I suppose...
What do you like about the show? Pretty much everything about it tbh. It’s a lot darker than most other shows of its kind and I think that’s what drew me in - that and Eric being a savage right off the bat. His character really hooked me into the show to begin with. I also love the fact the ‘heroes’ (aka Diana and five kids with no brain cells) don’t always succeed, it really challenges them in places which leads to interesting conflict resolutions. Oh, and Hank isn’t always right, it always makes me happy when he messes up idk why.
Who is your favourite main character? My trash boy Eric for sure, although Diana takes an extremely close second for being such a badass and a QUEEN. Eric just really amuses me, and I love his snarky quips at everything Hank does. He also has the most character development which is nice to see in a cartoon and by the end becomes somewhat competent at helping the others. I also have a thing for characters with tragic backstories, and although he’s a a whiny bitch, its clear from some episodes (such as that one with my main man Rahmoud) that he doesn’t have the best relationship with his father which sort of drew me in even more as it’s never touched on again in the show.
Who is your least favourite main character? Of course I’m gonna have to say Uni. It’s not that I don’t like her, but she’s incredibly annoying. Most of the time there’s no reason for her to be even there, she just causes more problems.
Who is your favourite secondary character? Theres quite a few to choose from here, but I’m probably torn between Rahmoud and Shadow Demon. Rahmoud is a goddamn LEGEND, and really helps the kids out and takes them under his wing. I sorta wish he had a couple more episodes where the kids stay round at his palace for a few nights just to chill out, but we can dream. I also love Shadow Demon, all he does is glide around, but I find him kinda hilarious the way he just swoops in - OH MY GOD I FORGOT ABOUT LORNE. YOU KNOW WHAT, LORNE. LORNE IS MY FAVOURITE.
Who is your least favourite secondary character? Amber - that creepy ass fairy dragon. Like, I was genuinely creeped out for 95% of that episode. Why did she have such an obsession with Presto?? It’s a bit weird if you ask me, and I’ll never get over it.
Your favourite episode? Theres a lot of good ones, but my favourite is the ‘Dungeon at the Heart of Dawn’. The whole he-who-should-not-be-named thing intrigues me, and to see Venger so terrified in it’s presence really makes you wonder how this monster came about. Are we just going to pretend Eric didn’t obviously stare at it when DM said not to I’m also a complete sucker for the ‘leave me, you go on ahead’ plot, which this has a lot in. Oh and DM is a savage when he casually forgets about Eric and “accidentally” leaves him to nearly die. Other episodes I love are ‘Quest of the Skeleton Warrior’ (because we get to really see the characters develop with their worst fears), and ‘The Girl Who Dreamed Tomorrow’ (I think the maze was low-key kinda cool and I love that scene which their minds are manipulated to turn on each other)
Any ships? Hank and Shiela, although that’s pretty much canon. I also like the Hank/ Diana ship because they have great dynamics when they work together (though Diana could do much better than basic boy Hank). I’m not the biggest fan of her character but I do also love the Presto/ Varla ship simply because it’s adorable af.
What do you wish there was more of in the DnDC fandom? People, really - and memes. I could talk about this stupid show 24/7 but apparently my friends are too ‘cool’ for cringey 80’s cartoons. I have discovered more fans in time though, I just hope it will live on for future generations. Also we need more cosplayers in this fandom, personally I cosplay Eric, and I would quite like to finally go to a convention and find the rest of the gang. I know you guys are out there...
What changes would you make in a DnDC reboot? You know, I’m not sure this show needs a reboot, it’s classic animation and cheesy one-liners are what attracted me in the first place. It COULD do with a banging theme tune though and a better opening title sequence, and maybe have the first episode explain the backstory a bit more rather than shove it in the opening.
#DnDC#Dungeons and Dragons Cartoon#Eric the Cavalier#Shiela the Thief#Hank the Ranger#Diana the Acrobat#Bobby the Barbarian#Presto the Magician#I love this stupid show way too much#This show needs more love#I should not be as obsessed with this show as I am
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So this is probably a tad late but I realized you are probably the biggest Star Wars fan I follow (okay maybe not probably) but I want your opinion on TLJ and to an extent TFW, like you honest impression and opinion. I have no problem asking off anon/sending a message if you’ve got some opinions™️, just state so.
Hi Anon! I’m perfectly comfortable answering anonymous messages or carrying on conversations via DM, so however you feel most comfortable is fine by me! I do have A LOT of opinions though and I’m probably not going to remember half of them for this post, so if there’s anything you want me to elaborate on or any other questions you may have, feel free to ask me however you like!
(I’m putting this under a cut because holy crap, this went on so much longer than I ever thought it would.)
Okay, first off: I think TFA had great potential as a film. ( I know you asked more specifically about TLJ, but I feel like I have to start at the beginning to get my thoughts semi-in-order. TFA introduced what could have been very interesting characters: a female orphan scavenger Force sensitive, a POC stormtrooper raised from birth for destruction but with a kind heart that ultimately guides him, a hotshot pilot with a gentle soul and a desire to do the right thing while remaining loyal to whom and what he believes in – even a female stormtrooper captain who could have had such a great backstory if they’d just let her. I can’t demonize TFA too much on not developing these characters because it’s the first installment in the saga, but still, where TFA failed is in its progression of the characters. I can almost forgive Rey’s overt Force abilities in the fight with Kylo Ren because yeah, we’ve seen the same with Luke on a slightly smaller scale, but it still felt a little bit jerky to me in terms of flow. Finn and Poe fared better in my opinion, but only because I felt like this new trilogy would give each of the new trio a movie in which to shine: TFA would be Rey’s and Finn and Poe would have what became TLJ and Episode IX to be more of the focal characters.
But here’s where I have issues with TFA. First, the movie was just a remake of A New Hope with different characters. I get that JJ Abrams was trying to appeal to the original fans while still providing that same magic to bring in the younger generations, but sheesh, the whole plot is essentially recycled with a few things moved around order-wise. Desert planet that isn’t Tatooine but looks like it, jungle planet that isn’t Yavin IV but looks similar, a “Death Star” that isn’t a Death Star but is essentially a Death Star, the death of a wise old mentor… There was literally no originality. I think JJ let his fears of fucking up the saga get the better of him, so he was too afraid to branch out and make the movie really great. He could have used similar elements and plot points as an homage to the first movie while still providing his own take on modernizing the film, or placing different characters as the focal point. In the end, even though I cried like four times watching it because Han Solo was one of my favorite characters and didn’t deserve to go out like that, I can’t rag on JJ too hard for TFA. He tried, but he fell flat on some things, and ultimately his treatment of an Original Trilogy character opened the door for some atrocities to be committed down the road.
And speaking of atrocities, that leads me to TLJ. Now, I’ll be honest here, I’ve only seen the movie once and fucking refuse to watch it again, but I’ve read a lot of other people’s reactions to it and examined some articles/YouTube videos explaining why everybody else thinks it’s such a bad movie, so I’ll call on what I remember for now and if anything else comes up in the future, I’ll let you know. But I’ll start here and now by saying that the reason TLJ was a failure from the start falls directly on the shoulders of Rian Johnson. Rian Fucking Johnson, Mr. Hubris, who literally said he set out to make a movie that destroyed fan expectations and worked to keep them guessing (if I remember correctly – like I said, I’ve sworn off TLJ content for awhile now just to keep my blood from boiling). The direction Rian took TLJ made no fucking sense and completely torpedoed the outline that JJ had for the movie, derailing the trilogy as a whole just because Rian wanted to be the smug, smart asshole who knew better than anybody what was gonna happen. As a result, the movie is full of plot holes and directionless actions and flat dialogue and ridiculous characterizations, and it’s not just a failure as a Star Wars film, it’s a failure as a movie in general because the plot simply doesn’t hold water. It’s literally a low-speed car chase with some cool effects that made half of its characters either useless, annoying, OOC, or redundant. It’s bad. My creative writing professors aren’t even dead yet, but if I’d turned in that script for one of my classes, they’d be rolling in their graves. (Did I mention I studied writing, grammar, composition, storytelling, character building and plot development for four years in college and make my living as a writer now? Trust me, I know my shit.)
First off, one of the biggest failings Rian Johnson had aside from the general plot was mistreatment of characters. The POC characters Finn, Poe, and Rose bore the brunt of that because Rian wouldn’t know how to write good POC characters if they literally smacked him in the face – hell, even the best of us white people are still learning. But Poe was reduced to an angry Latino stereotype, which made absolutely no sense considering his actions and attitude in TFA. He trusted Leia and the Resistance leaders and followed them because he respected them, not because he was blinded by them or whatever else anyone can try to insinuate. Admittedly he’s right to question Holdo because her actions make no sense and there’s literally nO REASON FOR HER NOT TO TELL HIM WHAT’S GOING ON, but he wouldn’t just fly off the handle and stage a mutiny like that. He would have talked to Leia about it repeatedly, talked to Holdo and others repeatedly, and Leia would have made Holdo see sense if she was in character AND SHE NEVER WOULD HAVE FUCKING STUNNED POE.
Ahem.
Finn and Rose’s storyline is harder for me to remember because I hated that cantina sidequest thing so much, but what I do remember is feeling like Finn wasn’t even the same person (he wasn’t, because Rian Johnson killed him and put someone else in his place) and Rose was just redundant because it felt like she was created to be a love interest so Finn would be with someone other than Rey (again, I’m fine with platonic best friend relationships, but considering the fact that Finn/Rey would be a biracial relationship and the big ship R*eylo is founded on a whiny white man literally abusing the female protagonist, it just seems like a blatant attempt to undermine the POC characters and relationships in the film). Now let me be clear: what happened to Finn and Rose is not the actors’ faults, as they were at the mercy of Rian Fucking Johnson, and it isn’t the characters’ faults that they’re so weak. That’s all on bad writing and Rian Johnson, and I’m in no way blaming anyone but him for destroying them. (Also, I don’t want Finn to die at all, but having Rose save him from sacrificing himself just so she could kiss him and declare love for him and keep fans guessing again is just…so bad, Rian. Why won’t you let your characters make sense.)
And then there’s Rey. If I’m remembering correctly, both Daisy Ridley and Mark Hamill said they didn’t get back into character for TLJ because the characters they played, Rey and Luke, weren’t even the same characters in this film, and whoo boy, does it show. First off, I hate this term, but Rey was essentially a Mary Sue in this film. She had pretty much no training with Luke but somehow managed to be an amazing Force user anyway?? Look, I’m a naturally talented singer, but I didn’t just get good because of that, I got good because I worked hard and studied technique and worked with instructors who helped me take my natural talent and channel it and refine it into something better. That’s what Luke should have done. That’s what Rey should have gotten. But neither of them were in character so of course we didn’t get that. Instead, we got an angry, sullen Luke who tried to murder his nephew in his sleep, which NEVER WOULD HAVE HAPPENED BECAUSE HE SAW ENOUGH GOOD IN DARTH VADER NOT TO MURDER HIM SO WHY THE FUCK WOULD HE DO IT TO HIS NEPHEW, HIS SISTER’S ONLY CHILD. No sense people. No sense.
Rey being a nobody is a controversial point because some people love the fact that a great Jedi can be anyone at all. I get that. But what those people don’t realize is that the Skywalker line came from a slave woman. She was a “nobody” in the grand scheme of things – no disrespect to Shmi Skywalker, who was a powerful woman and a goddess in her own right. Making Rey a Skywalker (either from Luke’s line or Leia’s) does not diminish the “nobody” thing. In fact, it’s the only thing that makes sense, because that lightsaber belongs to the Skywalker line and it wouldn’t just call out to anybody – my creative writing professors would have shot that shit down in a heartbeat. So I think Rey will actually end up being someone with a connection to the Skywalkers; some people theorized that “The Chosen One,” AKA Anakin born of midichlorians, could be almost an avatar-like thing, or Rey could be a reincarnation of Anakin if she’s not a Skywalker/Solo somehow. Kinda farfetched, but no less farfetched than the rest of this fucking movie, so whatever.
Tying Rey and Kylo together could have been so interesting if Rey was his sister. I loved the idea that Rey and Kylo were both Solo children of the Skywalker bloodline, representing the Light and Dark sides of the Force and proving that ultimately, the balance between Dark and Light is what defeats true evil and restores balance to the galaxy (after all, balance is not the absence of dark or light, but an equal ratio of it, and I firmly believe that being a Jedi should not be banishing all the darkness in you, but simply controlling it and centering yourself on the balance between love and passion and anger and pain). It would have made such a good story for Kylo Ren to be a double agent or a legitimately brainwashed young man struggling to do what he thinks is right and being misled but still using his gifts to support balance once he realizes he’s been led astray. Instead, we got literally the worst villain ever: he’s not intimidating, he’s whiny, he pitches temper tantrums, he’s selfish, he’s abusive, he’s impulsive… The writers can’t figure out what they want with him, because they’ve worked so hard to make us sympathize with him and like him and set him up like a misunderstood kid, but then they go and have him make the conscious choice to be evil but still be all those “good” things? It makes no sense. His character progression is all over the place because Rian can’t write and the Kylo he created is not even the same character as JJ put in TFA. And as a result, we now have just about canon proof that Rian wanted R*eylo, which is just another glorified abusive relationship that “stans” keep romanticizing. Gag me with a spoon. I’m done.
Also, who the fuck was Snoke? How was he so powerful? Where did he come from? How did he brainwash Kylo? Who trained him or how did he learn all he knew? How could he see everything and sense everything but not hear, see, or feel Kylo moving the lightsaber? Why were he and Phasma completely nerfed and killed out of nowhere with absolutely no character development or reason for dying? The world may never know.
And here’s where I get really angry: the sheer disrespect for the Original Trilogy characters. Harrison was ready to retire as Han, and I can understand that – I don’t like how Han went out, but I can almost forgive that because I don’t want the actors to be miserable. But what they did to Luke and Leia is unforgivable. Straight up, point blank. Luke Skywalker would never try to murder his nephew in his sleep. Leia would never stun Poe or send her son away or be a terrible, absentee parent. Luke would never be the person he was in that movie, because even in the depths of despair, Luke chose good, chose to see the good in others. He and Leia never gave up hope or belief that good would always triumph over evil. The Luke I saw in TLJ had none of that, and Mark Hamill himself said it wasn’t Luke, it was “Jake Skywalker” or some other nonsense. Mark is a genuinely kind and accepting person, so if you manage to make him angry about a character he’s played for more than thirty years, you’ve fucked up big time, and Rian Johnson did just that. And what’s worse, there was no reason for Luke to die aside from the fact that he just wasn’t convenient for the writers to consider anymore. Han’s death happened to let Harrison retire, but Luke’s was just to get the old generation out so Kathleen Kennedy and the other Powers That Be could do whatever they wanted in the Star Wars universe and milk that cash cow for all it’s worth. Now that Carrie’s gone, all real ties to the Lucasverse are gone, and I’m not convinced they weren’t going to kill Leia off anyway for the reasons I stated above. The blatant disrespect of that, of destroying characters I’ve loved my whole life, who literally kept me alive when nothing else did… It’s unforgivable. I wept like I lost loved ones watching Luke and Han die, and I refuse to do it again.
And here’s what it all comes down to for me: hope. Star Wars was founded on hope. The whole franchise was created in the wake of the Vietnam War when everyone needed something good to believe in, a clear divide between good and evil where good won simply because it was willing to fight for what it believed in, support others, love others, do the right thing. Even when the chips were down and everything was at its darkest in ESB, they always had hope, and in the end, hope won out. There are literally documentaries out there and books written about the success of Star Wars and the fact that hope is its literal cornerstone. The sequel trilogy destroyed all of that. There is no hope anymore. The Resistance is pretty much decimated at the end of TLJ, and at the hands of a government (not even a government??) that rose up out of nothing and destroyed like twelve planets with a flick of a switch and blew billions of people away (and of course we never hear another word about that because that can’t be important at all). Everyone is dying. There are no ships left. There are no forces – less than 100 people made it off that salt planet whose name escapes me and I don’t care enough to look up, and it might have been less than 50. There is no chance that the Resistance can rise up out of nothing and overcome that. Considering how far Rian derailed the progression of the trilogy as a whole, I don’t know how on earth JJ can come back and fix it with literally nothing on his side – all for the sake of shock factor (I swear, I shake my fist at Rian Johnson in my head at least once a day). I know the modern trend is to shoot for gritty, hopeless, “realistic” films because that’s what the current mood is in this country and around the world, but that’s not what Star Wars is about. That’s never been what Star Wars is about. The whole story was built on the foundation of hope, that good could rise and triumph over evil, and there’s simply no room for that in this sequel trilogy. Essentially, the sequel trilogy has failed because it destroyed what makes Star Wars “Star Wars” at its core, and for that, I will never forgive it. The prequels may have been dark, but they exist to show that while the good can fall, ultimately, they can rise again even if in the smallest of ways. “Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise.” The narrative is so convoluted and misconstrued in the sequel trilogy, and it will never be able to find that same foundation of hope again because Disney fucked up. As I said in 2017, “Star Wars is dead. Long live Star Wars.” So I’ll stick to my Original Trilogy and remember the good things that kept me going, the characters and actors that saved my life and made me realize that even in the face of darkness, hope and love can overcome all. That’s Star Wars to me. Honestly, that’s what Rogue One delivered, and if you take anything out of this, it’s that Rogue One is the only Star Wars thing Disney did right. But the sequel trilogy isn’t Star Wars, it isn’t even halfway decent storytelling, and I hope that on the day I die Rian Johnson and everyone responsible for TLJ can lower me into my grave so they can let me down one last time.
I probably left a lot out because I have so many feelings on this matter, and this response is like encyclopedia-long as is, but it’s the truth of what I feel, and I really hope I shed some light on the topic for you (probably way too much light, but I digress). Thank you for caring about my opinions Anon! I really appreciate you giving me the opportunity to put my thoughts down, and if you managed to make it to the end of this ridiculous post, just know that my inbox and my asks are always open for any clarification or fandom-screaming or thoughts in general. Have an amazing day, and as some people whom I love very dearly used to say, “May the Force be with you. Always.”
#star wars#anti tfa#anti tlj#these are my opinions guys don't @me#I was actually asked for this lmao#thanks again anon i love u for this#forcie rambles#adventures of a panic stricken graduate#who probably could have gotten her degree in star wars lore tbh
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what did it cost?
this took...longer than expected, but finally! she produces some content!
this is partially self-indulgent and partially for the @fyeahreddie “heat” prompt. I took some artistic liberties and used “heat” as “heat of the moment”. if you’re feeling like that phrase pops up Too Much in this, that’s why.
anyways. here you go, Marvel friends. enjoy my non-crossover crossover :) (and if you want it on Ao3, it’s here.)
title: what did it cost? rating: G af word count: 2500 warnings: MAJOR Avengers: Infinity War spoilers summary: “You would punch Thanos for me?” “I would,” Richie confirmed, finally looking up. His eyes were a little watery, which made Eddie smile. “At the expense of the universe, I would punch Thanos every time. For you.”
“I still don’t fucking understand this game.”
Bill sat back in his chair in a huff, crossing his arms and looking thoroughly sour. They were three hours into a knockoff game of Dungeons and Dragons that they were using as a joke predictor for Avengers: Infinity War , and Bill’s characters were dropping like flies.
“You’re just mad because you lost Loki in the first five minutes,” Ben pointed out, nudging Bill’s knee under the table fondly. “We all told you that trying to covertly stab Thanos was stupid.”
“He was the only character I actually wanted to play,” Bill grumbled, “and like half of my other ones are immediate toast. There’s really only like a 20% chance when push comes to shove that I actually get to keep Vision.”
“I get it, bud. I’m still kinda mad we sent Valkyrie and Korg off early, too.” Bev patted Bill’s shoulder sympathetically. “I really wanted to play her.”
“I really wanted to play Korg,” Richie cut in, eyeing Bill narrowly, “but SOMEone--”
“Enough.” Mike, their long-suffering DM, was somehow still patient even through the chaos and absurdity of the last few hours. “It is how it is. It’s not like this is the way things are actually going to go down in the movie.”
“I fucking hope not,” Bill said, eyes flashing dangerously. “This is a shitshow.”
“Thanos still has two stones to get,” Mike reminded them, “so things could turn around if you keep him away from them.”
Richie stared blankly back at him. “Isn’t the Time Stone at Thanos’ base right now? With Thanos? Things are looking bleak, my guy.”
“The stone is still in my posession.” Ben was looking thoughtful. “Mike, can I roll for clairvoyance, but instead of having a sensor, can I like...see the future? You know, because I have the Time Stone?”
Mike grinned excitedly. “I kinda hoped you would ask. Yeah, sure, Benny boy, rev it up.”
Ben carefully picked up a die, rolled it, and then let it come down on the table. It was a nat-16, and Mike peered thoughtfully down at it.
“Okay, not perfect, but...you can look at my whole manual except the last five pages, and you can’t tell anyone else what any of it says. Cool?”
“I’ll take it,” Ben said, making grabby hands for Mike’s painstakingly put together campaign notes. Beside him, Bill rolled his eyes.
“Can we speed this up so we can get back to the Earth plotline? I’ve got a Cap I’ve barely gotten to use yet.”
“You can hang out with me for a while if you want,” Stan called from the other group. Despite having a healthy interest in both Dungeons and Dragons and Marvel, once they’d started divvying up the characters and Richie had grabbed Starlord, he’d opted out, claiming he was “too old for this”.
“No, I wanna see if they screw this up,” Bill decided, leaning his elbows on the table.
“Same,” echoed Bev. “Who’s there again? It’s you, Ben as Doctor Strange, Rich as Starlord, Drax, and Tony, and Eddie as Spidey, Mantis, and Nebula, yeah?”
“Yes,” Mike confirmed, “so, basically, Richie and Eddie versus Thanos, with a guest appearance by Ben. Ben, how’s that reading coming?”
“Getting there,” Ben replied distractedly, flipping back and forth between two pages with a slight frown.
“Okay. Richie, Eddie, you ready to move forward? Got a plan?”
“Ready,” Eddie said firmly, looking over at Richie with a shy smile. Eddie had been relatively quiet all day, partially because he hadn’t gotten to play Richie’s love interest because Bev had snatched up Gamora almost immediately (and then Bev had fallen into a Thanos trap and gotten her killed, which he was pretty salty about) and partially because he loved to listen to Richie through games like these. He was such a natural storyteller. They were all dying for him to actually run a campaign instead of just dicking around with characters, but he claimed that he was too lazy to put in the work of putting one together. Only Eddie and Stan knew better; knew that he was too afraid of disappointing them to be able to write anything at all, knew that it was often a chore for Richie to get out of bed, much less write a whole campaign.
Someday, maybe.
“Yeah, Spaghetti Man, we got this. Let’s kick this purple asshole in the nuts.” Richie leaned back in his chair, an easy smile on his face. “Tony Stark surprise attacks from above.”
“Roll for stealth. How much damage you can do will depend on how this roll turns out.” Mike moved towards Ben so they could share his notes while Ben finished reading, and the fight proceeded. Richie and Eddie had put together a really impressive plan, which culminated in Eddie’s Mantis putting Thanos to sleep so that the rest of them could pull the Infinity Gauntlet off of Thanos’ arm. It should have worked easily and seamlessly, but then Eddie’s mouth got ahead of his mind in his excitement.
“Mike. New thing. Nebula taunts Thanos about Gamora.”
Mike tutted, shaking his head. “Nebula hasn’t been told any details about what’s happened to Gamora.”
“Nebula can infer,” Eddie insisted. “And she does, to make Thanos suffer more.”
“Roll,” Mike said, gesturing broadly with his hand. Eddie quickly grabbed the dice and rolled a nat-10. “Okay, so it’s not a taunt, per-se, but Nebula says out loud that Thanos has killed Gamora. Reminder that this is the first time any of the rest of the Guardians have heard about this. Mantis, Drax, Starlord, do you do anything?”
“Mantis does not,” Eddie said confidently. “She’s a little busy.”
Richie didn’t answer right away. He was staring at Eddie with an expression that was bordering on anguish.
“Drax? Starlord? Anything in the heat of the moment?” Mike waved his arms in front of Richie’s face. “Earth to Rich?”
“Heat of the moment…” Richie muttered, eyes never leaving Eddie’s face. “Yes. Starlord punches Thanos in the face.”
The entire group sat still for a moment, too stunned to move, and then erupted into chaos.
“He does WHAT now?!?”
“Oh, I’m so glad I’m not a part of this particular plotline, they’re fuckin’ done now…”
“Richie, no!” Eddie’s eyes were frantic. “You can’t! You’ll undo everything!”
Ben stood up and looked around, and the rest of the table fell silent, waiting for him to dispense his newly-acquired wisdom. They were not expecting anything like the words that came out of his mouth.
“Let him do it.”
“We’ll die!” Eddie protested loudly. “Richie--”
“Let him,” Ben insisted, meeting Eddie’s gaze with a solid, zen look of his own, and Eddie knew he was defeated.
“Will you roll, Richie?” Mike asked gently, trying to get Richie’s attention. Richie was STILL staring at Eddie. It was unclear whether or not he’d been cognizant of any of the commotion that had ensued around his decision. “You gonna go through with this heat of the moment kamikaze?”
Slowly and deliberately, Richie nodded. “I’ll roll for damage.”
Mike passed him the die, and he blew on it quickly for luck, shook it once, and then let go.
The roll was a five. Eddie dug his fingers into his thighs to keep himself from trying to flip the table.
“My shit decision’s starting to look pretty good right now,” Bill murmured as Mike sighed and took his notes back from Ben.
“You land the punch, but it doesn’t do anything but snap him out of Mantis’ sleep. He gets the gauntlet back and easily begins to defeat your team. He goes after Tony Stark specifically because he sees him as the biggest threat.” Mike pulled his chair back a little bit and took a deep breath. “Things aren’t looking good, and I think we should break there. Take ten minutes.”
“Cool,” agreed Bill and Bev in unison. Bev stood and began walking towards the back door, presumably to go out and smoke, and Bill headed for the study, where Stan was waiting to hear about what had just happened. Mike collected his notes and walked towards the front door, maybe to review, maybe to get some fresh are, or maybe just to scream out into the street in frustration about how ridiculous his friends were. None of them knew for sure.
“We can still win, right Ben?” Eddie was still too jarred by Richie’s rash decision to feel like he was able to speak to him, so he turned desperately to Ben. “You saw outcomes where we could all live, right?”
“I dunno about all ,” Ben answered carefully, backing towards the back door, “but there’s hope.”
“Ben--” Eddie tried again, but Ben had sped up his retreat.
“There’s hope!” he called again, and then Eddie heard the back door slam.
Slowly, he turned back towards Richie, who was studying his hands with an uncharacteristic amount of focus.
“Care to explain?” Eddie asked quietly, drawing out each syllable in an attempt to convey his dissatisfaction.
Richie didn’t meet his eyes. “No.”
“No?” Eddie nudged his leg to try and get him to look up. “Just an impulse decision, then? I mean, dude, it was just Gamora--”
“I was thinking about you,” Richie muttered, nudging Eddie’s leg back but still not making eye contact. “The whole thing just...made me think about you.”
Eddie had no idea what to make of that.
“I don’t get the connection,” he finally said, tired of trying to puzzle things out by himself.
“Because you’re like, my Gamora,” Richie continued reluctantly, pulling at the beginnings of a tear in the left knee of his jeans. “Not like. Green. But. You’re both strong, bad at dancing, and laugh at my jokes even when it pains you to.”
“Gamora laughs at your jokes?” Eddie asked teasingly, trying to ignore the fact that his insides were blooming in a way that made him feel like a flower moving towards sunlight.
“Starlord’s jokes. You know.” Richie stomped lightly on Eddie’s foot in mock-exasperation. “Anyway, I was thinking about what I’d do in the heat of the moment if I found out you were dead. You know, a little light thinking.”
Eddie gave up on stopping the blooming feeling. He was a whole-ass flower, and Richie was the sun. “You would punch Thanos for me?”
“I would,” Richie confirmed, finally looking up. His eyes were a little watery, which made Eddie smile. “At the expense of the universe, I would punch Thanos every time. For you.”
“You can’t go around making stupid decisions for me,” Eddie chided, but it was obvious he didn’t mean it; his hands and body were moving forward almost robotically to wind around Richie. “Especially with the universe at stake.”
Richie watched Eddie curiously, hands moving reflexively down to grab him for support when he climbed on to Richie’s lap. “You really don’t know me at all, huh?”
“I know you,” Eddie insisted, looking down at Richie’s slight frown and mirroring it.
“I’m always gonna be the ‘punch Thanos’ guy, Eddie,” Richie said simply. “Stupid decisions in the heat of the moment are my thing, especially when there’s feelings involved.”
“Feelings?” Eddie asked, not sure whether or not he was teasing. It came out a little strangled due to his indecision, and he pulled back a little bit, embarrassed.
Richie took a moment, composed himself, and then looked back up, sliding his hand along Eddie’s jaw and gently moving his face so that they were making eye contact.
“I love you,” Richie said, so quietly Eddie wasn’t sure if he’d imagined it at first. “Of course I would punch Thanos for you. I love you.”
Eddie was no longer a flower; he was a cherry tree in bloom, and flowers were opening up through his face, his chest, his arms.
I love you.
“Was this...is this...a stupid decision in the heat of the moment kind of thing?” Eddie asked after a few silent, explosive seconds.
“I dunno if this qualifies as heat of the moment,” Richie replied carefully, “and it really wasn’t intended to be stupid. That doesn’t mean that it’s not, but.”
“It’s not,” Eddie confirmed, leaning down and brushing his lips against Richie’s. “It’s not.”
Richie reflexively kissed back, closing his eyes and sinking back in his chair. Both of them knew that there was an implicit promise in Eddie’s actions. It would take him a while to respond the way he wanted to - years of self-hatred and his mother’s conditioning meant that he was still in the beginning stages of learning not to bite back soft, affectionate words - but in not running away, in staying and holding on to Richie the way that he was, there was an understanding.
“Seems to me you shouldn’t be rewarding the man who killed the universe.” They broke apart upon hearing Bill’s voice, and turned to see him watching them from the kitchen with a strange, contorted look on his face. Beside him, Stan was picking at a fingernail, obviously uncomfortable.
“Just making the most of the time we have left,” Eddie responded neatly, sliding off of Richie’s lap and back into his own seat. “Are we ready to start again?”
“We’re picking up in Wakanda.” Mike had reentered quietly enough that none of them had noticed he’d come back, and his emergence sent a ripple of surprise through the room. “We need a break from space. Bill, are you ready?”
“To fucking die?” Bill grinned. “Sure, why not. Let’s go out with some style, though, yeah? Bev, you ready to have Shuuri yank this Infinity Stone out of Vision’s head?”
“One minute!” Bev called from the back porch.
“See?” Richie said, gesturing broadly, “there’s still stuff to be done. Game’s not over. Not a decision with terrible repercussions at the end of the day.”
“No, it was,” Bill disagreed, moving back to his seat, “no matter what you’re trying to tell yourself.”
Eddie slid his hand into Richie’s under the table, and held his gaze as Bev and Ben finally reappeared, looking suspiciously windblown.
“It wasn’t,” Eddie whispered to him. “It wasn’t.”
“I know,” Richie whispered back. “Bill doesn’t fucking understand this game.”
“Or Dungeons and Dragons, for that matter,” Eddie said, grinning, and they both fell into peals of laughter, much to the confusion of the rest of the table.
If Eddie had to give up the universe for that specific heat of the moment decision again, he knew in that instant that he would do it - as many times as he had to, or maybe even as many times as he could.
A single I love you from Richie Tozier was maybe, probably, definitely more powerful than any Infinity Stone.
#reddie#reddie fanfic#richie tozier#eddie kaspbrak#the others are there too but i'm too lazy to tag#avengers: infinity war#crossover#ish#richie's an impulsive idiot and so is peter quill it's canon#iw spoilers#loser's club#stephen king's it
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can you tell us the meaning behind your recent self portrait? i recognize the key but I’m wondering if there’s other things
Oh cool I usually only get to talk about symbolism to friends in DM so this is legit perfect timing bc IM BORED AT WORK LET’S DO THIS *cracks knuckles*
ok so to sum it up:
1. assuming most here and obviously yourself know about the key already SO both the key ribbon and Fawful’s eyes are red to show the connection between the two.
2. half of my face is cast in shadow to represent the side of myself the world doesn’t see and that side also blends into Fawful because there’s an part of myself that feels more present in another dimension (where he would reside) than here— this goes back to comments I made as a young child where I told my mom I felt like one half of myself existed here and another half elsewhere
3. my expression. I know it looks emo af but it’s supposed to represent how despite my mind swirling in a thousand different directions at all times (which is why I chose swirls for background) I have been physically chronically tired my entire life. I am 99% certain (and my doctor agrees) that I’m narcoleptic and am supposed to get officially tested for it this year. It basically explains my entire life and it’s not fun lol.
4. Fawful is positioned behind me bc he’s a supportive and comforting presence in my life. But I think the entire drawing coming off as somewhat ‘creepy’ to most instead of a picture of comfort is appropriate considering I’ve been pretty consistently judged and/or misunderstood for this so it sort of is perception vs reality.
Thank you for asking!! Seriously. I feel awkward putting this out there without a prompt so this was awesome.
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SHIPPING INFO! answer the following for your muse so people know how shipping works on your blog. repost, don’t reblog
WHAT’S YOUR OTP FOR YOUR MUSE?:
Gangplank x Zoey
A dynamic couple who at first would want each other dead but later on began to see the other has a similar goal to them. Plus they both realize that one’s just as broken as the other and slowly rebuild their character, build up trust between each other and develop a sense of security to the point where they begin to fall for each other and mend their broken pieces.
WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO RP WHEN IT COMES TO SHIPPING?:
Outside of tumblr, I’m open to ALL SORTS of shipping themes. Angst, fluff, romantic, sexual, you name it
HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?
Zoey’s 26 and she generally doesn’t care too much for age gap (except anywhere beyond 30+ years). Unless they’re 1000+ years and appear to be in their mid-thirties, she’s okay with that.
ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?:
While generally, I have no problem with shipping with Zoey, I do ask that you don’t try and dick her first meeting. A little development and OOC chatting can get me going on shipping.
HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY’RE CONSIDERED NSFW?:
Once it gets to the point o being beyond intimate touching, then I’ll start tagging NSFW
WHO ARE OTHER MUSES YOU SHIP YOUR MUSE WITH?:
Outside of tumblr, I got one for Preston ( @traviling-mage ‘s OC plus his McCree), Cervantes and Michael (both @cervantestheferryman and @arcanist-mcallistar ‘s OCs), and then lastly, my dear BF and his muses McCree, Mordecai, Garrus, and Twisted Fate.
They each got a really unique chemistry and it’s so cool to see the development of these muses.
DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU:
Not really, but it would be cool if you just DM me beforehand if you wanna ship.
>HOW OFTEN DO YOU LIKE TO SHIP?:
I admit to being a bit of a ship whore myself, but I’ve started to get the hang of doing chemistry on tumblr.
>ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS:
If it isn’t evident with how much content I reblog that’s GangplankxZoey related, then idk where you’ve been.
ARE YOU MULTISHIP ?:
On here, no. On discord, yes I am (just ask and ye shall receive).
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?:
Besides Gangplank x Zoey:
- Rakan x Xayah. It’s canon, so
- Fiora x Darius (fuck you, Robyn) For one thing, while I don’t like most Demacian x Noxian champ ships, this one is actually an exception. The development and worldbuilding put in with this particular skin are absolutely amazing. And quite honestly Nightraven Fiora just... Had that air of Noxian feel and aesthetic to her it made more sense to have one stubborn Demacian-turned-Noxian have eyes set on a Noxian general who’s just as stubborn as her. It works so well!
- Yasuo x Ahri (you know who you are). A ship I never expected to ship nor want, but two particular blogs changed my mind about that
- Ekko x Taliyah (so god damn cute). They’re teens, they could start liking each other, they have crushes on each other. I mean, c’mon I know they’re from different factions but still, they just look cute together even.
- Swain x LeBlanc. I’m a sucker for the enemies/lovers trope, it’s ridiculous. It’s on the same level as Swain x Zoey where the two just want to kill each other but then you got the other half of the ship trope where they begin to sense a feeling of unexpected intimacy between them
- Thresh x Karthus (you know who you are) Another unexpected ship that I never knew I shipped. While yes this kind of ship can be seen as toxic, manipulative, or even gore filled, it’s one of the more unique ships and really interesting to see on my dash.
- Kayn x Kai x Valmar (you know who you are). A really interesting (and well developing) ship that is showing signs of becoming a healthy relationship in a polyamorous form.
- Kai x Valmar (because I just have to add these two precious gays). Again, it’s canon, so
- Pantheon x Leona (you know who you are) It’s really awesome to see a ship that has that “childhood friends” aspect in it and begin to grow from there. Plus on top of having similar aesthetics of each other, the two go together quite well.
- Garen x Taric (you know who you are) I’m a sucker for old friends now lovers deal.
WHAT IS YOUR NOTP?:
- Twisted Fate x Graves. I’m not a huge fan of this ship but it’s not considered a NOTP for me. But due to me being more used to the old lore of how Graves wanted TF dead, the whole truce thing after the Burning Tides kinda irked me, but hey, if you enjoy the ship, great. Just not my cup of tea.
- Anything incestuous or pedophiliac. Zo’s got two kids of her own and just... No. No. No. Fuck no. ANd don’t you dare come into my house and say, “oh but youre from the South incest is so normal for your culture hurr durr!!!!” Fuck off.
- Zed x Kayn. I understand interpreting their relationship in different ways, to ME, it’s more teacher-student, and nothing really more. And 99% of the time I really don’t get why they would want to be considered something more than “teacher and student”. But again, interpret it how you want it, that’s just my standpoint.
- Ekko x Jinx. I don’t have to explain myself with this one.
- Darius x Draven. WHY? JUST WHY?
- Kayn x Zoe. No, not MY Zoey, but lil’ star child Zoe. I get seeing it from the point of them being unexpected friends and maybe even have this weird sibling type of relationship (and those are just cute af), but romantic wise, no. Kayn’s about my age (19-21 sounds about right for him) and Zoe’s like 10-13 years old, so putting them in THAT kind of ship context is a no-no for me.
FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?:
Bitch, just come into my IMs or hmu on Discord (if you have it) and we can talk from there. Zoey’s really a sweet and loyal woman with her partner even if she is a killer crime lord and assassin wanted in certain areas of the world.
Tagged by : @not-draven-draaaven
Tagging : @strategion @i-love-rakan @fortunesails (I don’t remember if you did this) @blood-of-frost @aquaticsummoner
#ˢʰᵉ'ˢ ᶰᵒᵗ ᶦᶰ ʰᵉʳ ᵒᶠᶠᶦᶜᵉ | OOC#ᴼʰ ᶜᵃᵖᵗᵃᶦᶰ ᵐʸ ᶜᵃᵖᵗᵃᶦᶰ | Mun#I think you can tell where I begin to start running out of writing juice#I may have gone a bit overboard with this but what the fuck do I care?#also these are jsut all my explanations#don't take any of them for granted
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Do you mind giving me advice? I’m super anxious and depressed, and I specifically want to get help for my depression because it is RUINING ME, but I’m wicked embarrassed about it? Logically I know 1/10 people struggle with it and it’s not a big deal, but being so candid about my symptoms even to my doctor makes me wicked nervous. I don’t want to deal with it at all but that’s not gonna work for me either at this point. My doctor is cool af so idk why I can’t bring myself to get help!
Hey it’s okay I completely understand and I’ve been there. Seeing a doctor about something like this is very stressful because it’s expressing your vulnerabilities which we’ve been taught to keep inside and stand guard of. Depression and anxiety is a very tough thing to explain because it feels like there’s no rhyme or reason for it, and sometimes there just isn’t, but doctor’s know that. My doctor didn’t ask any questions that I deemed invasive or too private when I finally opened up and honestly it’s not worth suffering over. It so so difficult but making an appointment with the doctor is a giant step that you can take, and it’s more than likely you’ll be prescribed medication. I’m currently on 10mg cipralex and it’s working fantastically for me. Medication is a thing that needs to be tweaked and and adjusted sometimes but in the end you can always find something that can help you and give you peace of mind. The adjusting period for meds can be difficult but having people around that understand and support you during this period is very huge and helps a lot, and if you don’t have someone then I will be that someone.This is a long and hard journey to go through but I’m confident you can make it out the other side with that beautiful smile on your face. Please don’t hesitate to private message/dm me if you need anything else. I love you and I want to see you succeed 💖
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daddy’s journal: 2/17/16
previous journal entry 2/10/16
I slid the curtain to the side just enough for me to see the parking lot. I killed the lights in the room to mask my silhouette as I looked out. I’m at a semi-cheesy motel. Kimberly, my new exotic dancer friend, told me to get a room there. She’d be along shortly. I was smoking one of my Cohibas. Usually I don’t smoke when I’m about to meet ladies, but I knew there would be no kissing Kim. After a few minutes I sat down in front of my laptop & began writing this journal entry. I had a feeling Kim would be late.
It’s Tuesday evening but felt like Friday already. 30 hours ago I was sitting in my office when my phone rang. It was Pops, my boss, calling me to his office. As I walk past all the vacant offices of the recently slain I can’t help but feel I’m next. Am I a dead man walking?
I close the door behind me and sit down across from him. “Pops” is cool. He’s 7 years younger than me. He’s been to black strip clubs, likes rap including Jay Z, UGK and Big Sean. “Well I’ll just get right to it,” he said. He leans back and puts his feet up on his desk. My financial life flies past my eyes and I get nervous. “We’re doing salary reductions,” he says. He spent a few minutes explaining why then said, “Everyone over $100k gets 11% and everyone under gets 6%. I tried to fight for you but the board want’s to continue to cut costs so we can remain viable.” I make a scene like I really care. And appear visibly upset. But really I’m not. I got my side business going. I’m good. The cut just means one less vacation we’ll take this year.
I walk out keeping up my disappointment ruse and head back past all the empty offices. The layoff has left it bare and quiet. Boring even. I flop down behind my desk. I got some tumblr DMs from Muffin to answer and some messages from this new girl I’ve met on SA. I call her Bubbles. With the layoff it ain’t much to do though I pretend I’m super busy. On the way home Kimberly texts me. We’ve been texting since Sunday. She wants to get a room but I’m not in the mood. I go home, grab a glass of wine and watch some Love and Hip Hop to get my mind off things. Nothing clears the head like reality TV. I swear I’d marry Cardi B if I could. And Muffins keeping my DM lit up. I decide to move her to text.
The next day I keep up the texting with Muffin. I like her. She’s cool, sweet and definitely has some game. I like that. Pops comes by to make small talk but its just bullshit. He just wants to know if I’m still mad. I let him know I’m good even though I’m down to one direct report now. I hate corporate America. That afternoon Kim hits me again. She’s aggressive. “Can we meet tonight baby?” Throws in a couple of pics. “Yes,” I reply. A few hours later, I’m sitting here typing away at my keyboard. Cohiba in my mouth. I hear a car pull up and rush over to the window. It’s a black BMW. 4 series. Can’t be too old. New shit. Kim pops out the passenger side. Whoa. I go back and close the lid on my laptop and turn on the lamp. She knocks at the door, I open, and she walks in smelling like a bag of weed. The BMW she rode up in is parking. Probably her pimp. Sigh. That’s the game in these parts. Pimps have their girls working the clubs turning tricks and what not. Kimberly’s fine af though so I’m going to have to overlook this little situation.
I put out the cigar and we hug and chit chat briefly. She’s all business though. She strips down to nothing in less than 30 seconds. I salivate at the thought of licking that pretty ivory skin all over. But it’s not to be done. No oral contact. I quickly undress and lay on the bed. Kim pulls out a condom, puts it in her mouth and slides it on Bartholomew all in one move. She gets comfortable in between my legs while she licks here, there, and there. Its ok. Would be better without the latex. I ask if she can take it off. Offer more $$$ even but she says no. After a few minutes I’m hard a as a rock. Mostly from looking at Kim’s voluptuous body. Damn sure wasn’t from that dry ass knowledge she was giving me.
I get on top, enter, and pound that 23 year old muff. Sadly it wasn’t exciting as the Saturday before in the champagne room. I was going to cum quick until I felt her get wett. She wrapped them creamy thighs around me tighter and dug her fingernails into my back. I got turned on and for the next few minutes I felt like a King all back in touch with my 21 year old self until I came. I laid down while Kim jumped up and went to the bathroom. She came back with a warm towel and pulled off the latex. Then she did something unexpected. She ran her tongue along my dick. Lawd have mercy. I almost passed the fuck out. I was looking at her with this frown/half confused look on my face and she smiled and chuckled as she cleaned me up with the wet towel. She went and disposed of the latex and then came back and laid on the bed with me. Surprised me with that shit. With a pimp in the car I knew the clock was ticking. Sure enough she jumped up after 2 minutes and started getting dressed. I barely had my socks on before she had walked over, gave me a hug and left.
It was fun but not the thrill like the champagne room. I save my journal entry and kill my laptop. I’ll finish typing after the fact. I head home, answer a few tumblr posts and text Muffin. We’ve setup a potential date and I’m looking forward to meeting her in a few days at that point. Before I go to bed Bubbles texts. I kind of had blown her off. Her pics on her profile were of this drop dead gorgeous model looking chick. I’m thinking no way this chick is real or maybe she’s a flake. Like a mind reader she randomly text saying its her in the profile. Cute. Half hour later we have a date for Thursday. I love it when things move along.
I met up with Firecracker Wed. afternoon. Things have been different between. Now that I have my perspective back I’m good. I’ve decided to get back to just enjoying our arrangement for what it is. Since then I’ve been over my puppy love. Firecracker has always been a complete turn on for me so I quickly undress her, ready for that kitty. I’ve had some anons asking what about FC has me going crazy. One thing is she’s consistent about her body and looks. That stuff’s always on point. Always smells fresh. Skin softy and creamy. Not sure what lotion she uses but it smells good. The kitty doesn’t even smell or have taste…well there was this one time I could swear I tasted vinegar. Body always clean. Toes. Nails always done. If she’s not wearing some cute ass outfit…she’s wearing some cute ass outfit. LOL. Hopefully some of you will get that.
20 minutes after getting into the room we’re laying beside each other panting, sweaty. The sex has been different lately too. Not sure if it’s me or her or a weird combination of things but sex is definitely more sensual. Ironic since I’ve decided to back off all the drama. We talked about her leaving this summer, her new boyfriend and several other things. All that talking got me hot again. Bartholomew was hard as a rock. I started kissing on her as she talked. At first it had no affect but then her eyes started closing and she stopped talking on occasion as I kissed all the spots I knew she liked. Then I made my way down her body to the kitty. I kissed her inner thighs and ran my fingernails along her legs and up her body to her breasts. I followed it up with kissing all the places my fingers had been until she just stopped talking altogether. I went to the bathroom, got a warm towel and came back and cleaned her up from round one.
Firecracker actually cums a bit. Then I started all over again, kissing her neck, sucking on her breasts, working my way down to the kitty. Before I did I kissed the thighs again. I went back to the kitty and sucked the clit while I thrashed it with my tongue. Then I did some side to side motion while I sucked the clit. She came in less than a minute. I put on the hat and slid back in for my second course. I don’t know what had got into me but I pounded that pink little muff like It was new to me. I’d love to tell you I fucked her for another hour but nah. I came quick, 5 minutes tops.
Time got away from us. She needed to get to her life. I needed to get back to mine. How it’s supposed to be really. As we got dressed she told me she bet I was going to go and fall asleep in my office since I had cum twice. I told her probably not. She had me all confused with them young boys. A couple of hours later I was in my office with the door closed, dozing off.
I texted Lala late that afternoon down in Miami. By the end of the night she hadn’t responded. She had been feeling some type of way about sugar and vanilla relationships. She wasn’t sure what she wanted. I started to text again but I let her make it. She has my number. She’ll hit me when or if she’s ever ready. Meanwhile Muffin’s keeping me distracted. You would think the conversation would haven’t gotten boring but nope.
The next day I woke up in a good mood. The week was crazy and judging by the signs of it, had no intention of getting better. By Midday Muffin and I were blowing up each others phone. Shit, I almost forgot about the date with Bubbles until she texted to confirm. We met at a swanky restaurant that evening. Lots of upscale patrons and what not. I was a little on the fence about meeting her there. She could be a catfish and I’d be fucked for an hour sitting across from some hound puppy looking chick. But I was wrong. Bubbles walked up living up to every pic I’d seen of her. I was like
Skinny girl. But pretty af. Dam if I didn’t feel like a stud as I entered the restaurant with her on my arm. We sat out on the patio. It’s early so not a lot of people out with us. Two chicks are at the table next to us but other than that we’re alone. Bubbles was simply refreshing from the start. We laughed and talked about all kinds of shit. I had forgot what it’s like to be out on a date having fun. Turned out she was half Dominican with a 25/25 mix of some German and Dutch lineage.
Right before the food came I realized the two women at the table across from us were touching each other and holding hands. I told Bubbles and she giggled. “I know. I’ve been watching them the whole time.” We both laughed then she said. “I’m bisexual.”
I stopped laughing.
We talked about her sexuality but we had to lower our voices because another crew came to the table behind us. Some grown ass women too. 30’s. And they were all up in our table. At one point I had turned to look behind me and one of them locked eyes with me. Good looking chick too. Mature 35, 36ish. I could fuck with her. Then I thought about all the lies I’d have to tell. How I wasn’t married. I got my own place blah blah. Fuck that. I’ll stick with the sugar.
The food came and went. By that point I knew she had a newborn at home and a baby daddy. We also went over the arrangement again. She wanted per meet and I was cool with that. Seems like that’s what most girls are wanting these days. She was open to something more structured and committed down the line. I told her we could do another date or two to loosen her up. And then she dropped the bomb on me, “Um. We can go ahead and get started tonight if you like….” I was like
40 minutes later, we were naked kissing each other as we fell onto the bed. Her body was flawless. You would have never known she had a baby. No stretch marks whatsoever. I started down towards the muff. “Great,” she said, smiling at me. “I’m multi orgasmic.”
And indeed she was. I started licking on the clit and she looked at me with that “Oh you know what you doing” look. I stopped and got her a pillow and put it under her head so she could watch the show. She wasn’t watching though. She was cumming left right for the next 10 minutes as I licked that clit mercilessly. She literally had a fit the whole time. When she came the first time she grab one of my ears and damn near twisted it off. The second one she squeezed my head together with her thighs. The third she grabbed the top of my head and squeezed it like a basketball as I slurped. The 4th … nevermind
She stopped me and told me, “ I want to taste it baby…” We kissed…well she sucked my tongue then ran her tongue all over my lips, jaw and chin, trying to taste her own kitty and savor the flavor. I put on the condom quickly and dove right in. All carpe diem and shit. But that that kitty was tight af. She loosened up a little bit but my gosh. She was tighter than frog’s ass. We went at it for a few minutes before she stopped me and asked, “You want to finish off in my mouth baby.” Why yes. Yes I do.
I laid down and she pulled off the hat and went to work. Man she had some good knowledge. She licked the shaft, tip, balls and then repeated the cycle a few times before concentrating on Bart completely. Man, those full lips and suction had me going. I tried to resist, holding back my cum but I couldn’t. Before I knew it I let go the hot protein treat into her mouth. She took it all in, every drop. Then she jumped off the bed and went to the bathroom. Not sure if she swallowed or spit. I was out of it. Bubbles came back and laid down next to me. We talked about how good it was to have met. How much we both hoped things would work out and we’d see each other again. We both vowed to at least give it a good try.
Outside we hugged and said goodbye. She didn’t want me to walk her to her car but I had to. It was kind of dark in the parking lot. When we got to it I could see why. Man, that little Honda had seen better days. First it was little, the hood was off another car and the bumper looked like someone had scrapped the paint off it. “I’m so embarrassed, “ she said, putting her hands over her face. “Its no big deal baby,” I told her. And it wasn’t. I’m a car buying motherfucker. And I let her know as much. She was all smiles. We hugged once more and left.
The next few days I mostly talked to Muffin. I asked Bubbles out for that Saturday but she rescheduled for Sunday, Valentine day. Surprisingly. I thought she was blowing smoke until we were actually sitting in the restaurant sipping margaritas. Mama had her hair up in a bun in jeans and t-shirt now. The wife and kids were gone to some kid shit functions so this was a good little getaway for me. I couldn’t’ tell you what the hell we talked about to be honest. It was a lot of shit.
At the end of the brunch she grabbed my hand and told me how great a time she had. How she hadn’t expected it to be that fun. Me neither really. As we left the restaurant the hostess stopped her. “Oh my god, you’re soooooo pretty,” she said. “I just wanted to tell you. I saw you when you walked in��.” and she went on for another half minute. It seemed like some lowkey lesbian stuff. Typical man reaction I guess.
Outside we started talking again. But I know she had to go pick up the young’in. So we hugged and kissed good bye. Lots of kissing. Lots. Damn, mama didn’t even care if we was outside and could be seen. I liked that shit too. Sugars supposed to be fun, exciting, thrilling. And Bubbles was delivering on every point.
I won’t get too excited about Bubbles. I know the game. In 4 weeks this could be all over and I’m like Bubbles who? As I drive home, checking the mirror for lipstick, I get a text from Kim with a few pics and the question, “Can I be your Valentine?”
It never ends.
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Say You Won't Let Go - Chapter 2
Camila was loving her time in Texas with Ally. Her family has treated Camila like one of their own. They even went as far as getting a couple Christmas gifts for the younger Latina girl, so she wouldn’t be left out when everyone was opening presents. Camila felt loved and safe around them. A safety she hasn’t felt in a while.
It also helps that she’s been talking to Lauren Jauregui from time to time. Lauren has been so nice, and sweet. Incredibly supportive about the channel. On top of all that, she’s hilarious. Every time they speak Camila has a lasting smile.
It was the day before New Years Eve, Camila and Ally were getting ready to go to the movies. Camila’s mind kept wandering to Lauren. When Lauren first wrote to her on twitter she freaked out. She couldn’t help but to tell Lauren over and over how amazing she was. Her phone started buzzing, and her smile grew.
Lauren: When do I get to see that beautiful face? 😏
KC: lol what makes u think im beautiful?
Lauren: well we’ve been DMing for about 2 weeks, & I conclude that even if ur not physically what the world would deem as beautiful, ur personality shines brighter than anything. Ur so funny, and crazy nice. Ur passion for music is undeniable. Thats beautiful. Thats u.
KC: Ur very charming Lauren. im not sure if that’s a good thing 🤔
Lauren: Its good, trust me. Not everyone gets this side of me. Lol
Lauren: Don’t u think u gotta show ur face eventually?
KC: Maybe, idk 🤷🏻♀️
Lauren: What are u going to do?
KC: What do u mean?
Lauren: Like with ur voice? Do u want to be bigger than “youtube star?”
KC: I haven’t thought about it. I never thought I’d be good enough for being anything else really. I never even thought I’d have more than 100 followers if im being honest.
Lauren: lol u really thought that? ur crazy gifted.
KC: I cant with ur compliments.
Lauren: telling the truth darling. ur voice is amazing, I’m sure u r beautiful. Ur chill af, with occasional fan girling, ur modest, ur a dork, ur sweet. Ur what this industry needs. Ur what girls will look up to, & boys would want to bring home to meet mom. The whole package.
KC: ahhh ur killing me. Seriously ur words are unbelievable. All this coming from YOU.
KC: Ur so beautiful.
KC: Not ur looks
KC: I mean, yes ur beautiful like that
KC: Why am I so awkward…
Lauren: lol Relax chicken, breathe.
KC: I mean, ur mind. ur words are kind, and inspiring.
Lauren: lol I’m just being honest dork
KC: atleast I’m a cute talented dork 😄
Lauren: Eh, ur ok
KC: lmao sure jan. do the words “unreasonably obsessed” sound familiar?
Lauren: doesn’t ring a bell
KC: Oh really? K. I guess I’ll be leaving! It was nice talking to u.
Lauren: Wait wait, no no. Don’t go. I’m joking
KC: New phone 📱 who dis?
Lauren: Lmao ur an idiot.
KC: 👋🏻
Lauren: Fine if that’s what u want KC. It was nice talking u. Just wanted to let u know I actually think ur talented. I hope u get everything u want in this world.
KC: Seriously, all jokes aside. Thank u, so much Lauren. It means alot. I’m happy I fan girl less when you hmu. Sometimes I’m like “DID LAUREN JUST SLIDE IN MY DMS?” Cus like You’re YOU, & I’m just me. And You telling me I have a nice voice, it’s like AHHHHH
Lauren: You’re not JUST you…you’re amazing.
KC: Uhhh 🙈 Thank you Laur, but I gotta go, going to the movies.
Lauren: Ok KC, hmu later? I enjoy talking to you. :D have a good night.
KC: Potassium
Lauren: what are u talking about?
KC: Potassium. What’s the periodic symbol?
Lauren: K? ….. OH! Wow, u are really a dork. Wow. Bye now. lol 😂
—————————-
It was around 11pm when Ally and Camila left the movie theater. Ally was hungry and Camila never turned down food, so they decided to stop at the Waffle house. They were browsing the menu when Camila got a twitter notification.
@LaurenJauregui: Yooo @KC_LoveOnly where’s that new cover thooo?
She smiled reading the tweet. She had been done with the video days ago, but she was nervous about uploading it knowing that a specific green eyed pop star would watch it. On top of that she decided to cover one of The Holy Trinity’s songs.
@KC_LoveOnly: Girl, when I know that ur a part of my audience, I GOT to make sure its peeeerrrfffecctt!! @LaurenJauregui
“Ally Brooke? Is that you!?!” Camila heard someone behind her say. Ally squealed hopping up from her seat. When Camila turned around her mouth hit the ground. She saw Ally hugging none other than 1/3 of The Holy Trinity, Normani Kordei.
Ally and Normani were best friends before Normani moved to Miami. They talked for a couple months before losing touch.
“What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be taking over the world with your voice?” Ally asked excitedly.
Normani laughed, “Well we finally got a break for the holidays, my family came here.”
“Are you eating here alone?” Ally asked noticing no one was with Normani.
“I was going to get some food and head home” she replied.
“No! Come sit with us!” Normani looked towards Ally’s table, eyeing Camila.
“Is she going to be okay?” she asked Ally, noticing Camila was stunned and still had her mouth open.
“Oh, that’s my best friend. I guess she might be a little star struck.” Ally snapped her fingers in front of Camila, who shook herself out of the shock she was in.
Normani laughed while sitting down next to Ally. Camila thought Normani’s smile could kill her.
“I’m Normani,” she reached her hand out to shake Camila’s.
“Y-yeah, I know. I mean, how can I not? You’re you!” Camila rambled. “I’m Camila Cabello.” She said shaking Normani’s hand.
“You’re cute Camila. Relax though, I’m not going to bite.” Camila ducked her head down shyly. “You’re lucky you’re not meeting my bandmates, they can be a little…rowdy. They might bite.” Normani joked, trying to put Camila at ease.
Normani and Ally caught up for a bit while they ate. Normani made sure to include Camila into the conversation, not wanting her to feel uncomfortable. Camila was surprised to see how down to earth Normani was.
“Hey, you girls should come over my house for a little. We can continue to catch up!” Normani suggested.
“That would be so much fun!” Ally exclaimed.
“Are you sure it’s okay if I come? I don’t want to intrude on your friendship reconnection. I can just go back to Ally’s,” Camila said timidly.
“Seriously? Talking to Ally and you has made me feel so…normal. I could use some normality. So yes, I’m inviting you to my house. We will talk, watch a movie, just hangout. Pleasssse come!” Normani begged Camila.
“Okay, okay!”
——————————–
When the girls got to Normani’s house she gave them a quick tour. Ally got to see Normani’s parents after years. She was happy that they still recognized her, and they were glad she was doing well.
They reached Normani’s room, and Camila launched herself onto the king-sized bed.
“This is sooooo comfy,” she said while rolling around. “Adopt me Normani.”
Ally and Normani laughed. Ally pushed Camila over to the other side of bed, and made herself comfortable. Normani turned on the TV, and started browsing Netflix sitting between the two girls.
“So how did you two meet?” she asked the girls, focusing on finding something to watch.
“College—Friends!” Camila shouted. “Please put on Friends. I love it.”
Normani chuckled at her and put on a random episode.
“As she was saying,” Ally continued, “We met in college.”
“Cool, so we are all the same age?” Normani said unsure.
“No, she’s almost two years younger than us. I didn’t want to live on campus and my past roommates were all crazy. I couldn’t afford living on my own, Camila had an ad looking for a roommate. I thought it was a good idea to get to know a roommate before having to live with them.” Ally explained.
“She fell in love with my dorky charm,” Camila said still focused on the TV.
“It’s true,” Ally joked, “Unfortunately.”
“Unfortunately?!” Camila threw her hands up, “Without my nerdy clumsiness, we would’ve never been roommates! I wouldn’t have the world’s best friend. I’d be stuck with Shawn. I love him, but he’s NOT you! I wouldn’t be sitting here enjoying Friends.” She exclaimed.
“You’d still be watching Friends somewhere. Relax. I love you, I’m glad we met.” Ally reassured her.
“Hmmph,” Camila folded her arms turning back to the TV.
Normani laughed at the two girls. “You go to Miami University and you didn’t come to see me?”
“Girl, you were touring by that time,” Ally responded. “How did all that happen by the way? The Holy freaking Trinity!”
Normani chuckled, “Ahhhh, where do I start?”
“Well, I know how you all met. We heard your recent interview,” Ally said.
“Oh, keeping tabs on me?” Normani joked.
At the sound of the interview Camila’s head shot up. She didn’t want Ally to tell Normani about KC. She thought it might be odd, and look bad. They mentioned her in an interview, then she somehow manages to bump into one of them.
“Sorry but no. Actually, Mila—”
“I just stumbled on it, and showed her.” Camila cut Ally off, giving her a pleading look. Ally nodded in understanding.
“It’s cool, happy to be in the company of a fan,” Normani winked at Camila. “Well, I don’t know what to add to that. After meeting Demi, the next day she introduced us to Simon Cowell. He was concerned that we were too young. Me and Lauren were 16, and Dinah freaking 15.”
“Was he mean like on TV?” Camila asked.
“Opposite, he so sweet. We are signed to his label now, throughout the whole process he was so helpful. I mean we were just teenagers trying to chase our dream.” Normani said. “Before signing a contract there was a lot of back and forward with our parents, because of school.”
“That’s awesome!” Camila said.
“Yeah!” She paused thinking fondly of the memories. “It took a lot to get where we are, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”
“That’s really cool, I’m so happy for you.” Ally said, hugging her old friend.
“Thank you, Ally.” Normani smiled into the hug.
After the embrace, the girls continued talking. Normani was elated to reconnect with Ally, but she was happier to get to know Camila. She thought the younger girl was adorable and dorky. Camila reminded Normani of Dinah.
The talking died down after about an hour, and the girls watched Friends. It took Ally about 2 episodes before she fell asleep.
“We should probably get going,” Camila said pointing out a sleeping Ally.
“Don’t be silly, stay the night,” Normani said sleepily. “I’ll get you some clothes to sleep in.”
She rubbed her eyes getting off the bed and rummaged through her draws. She pulled out a muscle tank top, and white shorts, handing them to Camila.
“Thank you, Normani. For everything, for letting a stranger stay here—”
“Stop, it’s all okay.” Normani cut her off, as she placed a reassuring hand on Camila’s shoulder. “You’re chill. A little quirky, but cool. It’s nice hanging out with people who aren’t trying to use me.”
“Thank you,” Camila replied giving her a hug.
When she let go of Normani she went to get changed in the bathroom. By the time she got out, Normani was already sleeping.
Camila shut the TV off and got comfortable in bed. She kept plenty of space between herself and Normani, not wanting to wake the older girl up while she used her phone.
She was on tumblr for about an hour, before she put on her headphones and decided to watch her video one more time before uploading it.
In the middle of her video, she got a text from Kellz. They’ve been talking every day since they exchanged numbers. He’s a nice guy. A bit insane, but she loved how care free he lived.
Kellz🎸: I think I just broke my face dude
Milz🎶: What do you mean?
Kellz🎸: I was just drunk fucking around. Running on cars. Fell smashed my face into the ground.
Milz🎶: Oh what different lives we live.
Kellz🎸: Lmao truu. So I’m playing a show in Miami in a couple weeks, u coming right? U get to see how I live first hand.
Milz🎶: For sure, just don’t let me break my face.
Kellz🎸: No promises Milz.
Milz🎶: Oh godddd
Kellz🎸: Turns out, my face isn’t the only thing I broke. Broke my arm to lol
Milz🎶: I’m rethinking this friendship, I think I’m going to get hurt just by being friends with you
Milz🎶: I’m rethinking this friendship, I think I’m going to get hurt just by being friends with you.
Kellz🎸: Nahhhh, u can’t leave me. We haven’t recorded a song yet!
Milz🎶: I thought we were merely writing a song? Now we are recording one?
Kellz🎸: Hell yeah! I can’t wait to chill with u! Explore that creative cool brain of urs.
Milz🎶: I’m not so sure about cool? Lol
Kellz🎸: Bro, just by the things you say when we text, I can tell ur crazy creative. That’s cool as fuck.
Camila felt the bed vibrating followed by an obnoxiously loud ring. After a couple of rings, she felt Normani shuffle around the bed.
“Girl don’t give me a reason to hate you, pick up that damn phone,” Normani grumbled.
Camila held back a laugh, “It’s not mine, grumpy.”
Normani huffed feeling around the bed for her phone. When she found it, she answered annoyed “You better be dying, there is no other reason to be calling at this ungodly hour!” Her toned soften after a moment. “Of course, babe. Do you want to talk about it?” she asked, pausing allowing the other person to talk. “Okay, you know where the spare key is. I love you.” She hung up, and looked at Camila.
“I’m sorry for being grouchy, I don’t like to be woken up. But why are you still awake? Is everything okay?” She said, concerned laced in her voice.
Camila pinched her cheeks, “Care about me already?!” she joked. “I just couldn’t sleep.” Camila yawned, “But I guess I’m getting tired now. Everything okay with your phone call?”
Normani nodded, “Yeah, my best friend is coming in a couple hours. I’m going to head back to sleep until she gets here.” She snuggled up to Ally. “Get some sleep Mila, goodnight.”
“Night Normani.”
Camila posted her video before turning off her phone. She got comfortable and headed to sleep. She was excited to meet one of Normani’s friends, hopefully they were just as chill.
———————————
Lauren was loving every minute of being home. She didn’t realize how much she missed her family. She missed her mother’s forehead kisses, and her father’s bear hugs. She missed hanging out with her siblings, Taylor and Chris. She was happy to see everyone’s faces when they opened Christmas presents from her.
She was more than happy to be talking to KC every so often. She thought the girl was talented, and after talking she liked her dorky personality. She hoped to see her face, but KC won’t let up.
It’s the day before New Year’s Eve, and she was schedule to make a club appearance. She was rummaging through her closet looking for something to wear for tonight when her sister came in and jumped on her bed. “So, what are your plans for tonight?”
“I’m kind of hosting this party at some club. Luckily, it’s not a singing job, just a partying one.” Lauren said, doing a little dance.
“Just don’t party too hard, you know dad doesn’t like your ‘Bad Girl” image. It certainly doesn’t help when you’re actually out there partying.“
Lauren and her dad have had their fair share of arguments about her bad girl tendencies. She’s never been one for rules, even when she was younger. When she went to California for the spring break where she met Dinah, her dad said no but she left anyways. She was grounded until that summer. "Dad will get over it like he always does.” She told Taylor.
Lauren pulled out her phone to listen to KC while she got ready to go. She was bummed when she noticed that KC hasn’t posted a new video since The Holy Trinity interview. Lauren hoped that didn’t scare her away.
@LaurenJauregui: Yooo @KC_LoveOnly where’s that new cover thooo?
Lauren smiled at her phone before locking it and tossing it on her bed. She continued looking through her clothes before picking out a cute black velvet dress.
After she showered, did her makeup, and got into her dress she took a picture for twitter. She was about to post when she got a tweet from K.C
@KC_LoveOnly: Girl, when I know that ur a part of my audience, I GOT to make sure its peeeerrrfffecctt!! @LaurenJauregui
Lauren laughed, and continued to posted her picture.
@LaurenJauregui: We outttttt tonight! 🎉
————————————
It was about 3:30 in the morning and Lauren was stumbling home. While at the club she ran into her old friend Vero. They danced all night and drank way too much.
They made a trip to the bathroom where Vero gave Lauren some coke. It wasn’t her first time doing it, within minutes she was dangerously high.
“Shhhit” Lauren cursed, trying to unlock her front door. She didn’t understand why she had so many keys, but most of all she couldn’t figure out which one opened her door.
“Ahhhhhh, that’s the one!” she said, tip toeing into her living room.
She whispered, “Honey! I’m home,” as she stumbled into an end table knocking over a lamp.
“Shhhhhh! You’re going to wake up papa, you stupid lamp!” she whispered shouted at it, while giggling. She heard someone clear their throat. When she turned around she was met with her fathers disappointed look. “Too late,” she laughed.
“Lauren, if you’re going to come home drunk at 3 in the morning can you at least keep it down. What kind of influence do you think this behavior is on your sister?”
Lauren immediately got angry. She thought she was a great influence on Taylor. She followed her dreams, and became an accomplished artist. Everything she does is for her family.
“I’m a suspectful..susss..successful influence on her.” She stated drunkenly, while her dad looked at her unimpressed, adding to her anger. She tossed her purse onto the sofa, and ran her fingers through her hair.
“Dad whatdoya w-want from me? I’m in what is probably the biggest girl group of this time!” she grinned widely, pleased with her career. “Everyone should be proud and inspired by me” she slurred.
“How can I be proud when I have to sit back and see pictures of my little girl stumbling out of clubs? I just want you to be careful. I don’t want you to do anything stupid Lauren.” Her dad sighed.
“I just go out to blow off steam—”
He cut her off, “What steam? You’re in the biggest girl group!” he mocked.
“Whatever dad. Just let me sssleep this off. Pleasee, yell at me later. You give me a headache” she groaned, rubbing her temples.
He sighed in defeat. “Fine, but here…don’t forget your things.” He picked up her bag to hand it to her. “Listen Mija, I love you and please know I’m proud of –” He stopped when he noticed some things spilling out of the purse. Lauren eyes grew wide when I saw the little baggy of white powder drop in front of his feet.
“Lauren, are you fucking kidding me? You’re stupid enough to bring drugs into my house? Around your siblings?” She looked down, not baring to see the disappointment in his eyes. “You know what! Get the hell out!”
She looked at him shocked, “What do you mean? Where am I supposed to go? It’s practically New Years Eve!”
“I don’t care where you go, but you’re not fucking staying here. I’m not dealing with your bullshit.” He spat. He reached down and grabbed the baggy before walking to the kitchen. “Go with the person who gave you this for all I fucking care.”
Lauren turned around not really knowing what do, she punched the wall until her hand was swollen. She took out her phone about to call the only person she can think of when her brother came downstairs.
“What’s going on Lauren?” Chris asked sleepily rubbing his eyes. She didn’t say anything but bury her face into his chest, as he wrapped his arms around her.
He never seen her this upset before, he didn’t know what to do but he knew not to press the issue.
“Can you take me to the airport?” she mumbled into him. He nodded, releasing her and headed up the stairs to grab his keys. Lauren brought the phone to her ear praying that it doesn’t go to voicemail.
“You better be dying, there is no other reason to be calling at this ungodly hour.”
“Is that offer to go to Texas still available?” Lauren sniffled.
“Of course, babe. Do you want to talk about it?” Normani asked.
“Not really.”
—————————-
Lauren was sitting at the airport, she luckily didn’t have to deal with paparazzi being that it was late. She did have to wait for her plane to be ready, due to the late notice. She sobered up as best to her abilities, which meant puking her guts out in the airport bathroom, and drinking water.
She scrolled through tumblr trying to push the thoughts of her argument with her dad out of her mind. She quickly forgot about everything when she got a notification that KC uploaded a new video. She clicked to watch the video:
“Hey pumkins! As promised I’m here to answer a few questions. I took the liberty to write down them down, as well as the answer. Hope you like!” KC said.
She had written down the questions on notecards with the answers on the back, and held them to the camera.
1. What do you look like?
She turned the card over and showed a horrible drawing of a girl stick figure. The answer read, “I look like a person. I have hair, eyes, a mouth, nose. The whole shebang.”
2. Where are you from?
“I grew up in Florida. I’m just around here and there ;)”
3. What inspires you?
“People. Love. Art itself.”
4. Who are some of your favorite musicians?
“I think Ed Sheeran is fantastic. And Taylor Swift influences me to write.”
5. What do you do?
“Well, this. I post videos, but I guess if you’re asking besides this��I go to college.”
“Okay,” she spoke, “I think that’s enough questions. I must keep some mystery to me. It’s a part of my charm, don’t you think?” She joked. “As many of you know a very talented girl group said they liked my channel. One girl specifically, so this next cover is for her.”
She started strumming.
I don’t admit it, I play it cool
But every minute, that I’m with you
I feel the fever, and I won’t lie
I break a sweat.
My body’s telling,
All the secrets I ain’t told you yet.
I struggle to contain,
The love that’s in my veins,
And how it circulates.
If you could take my pulse right now,
It would feel just like a sledgehammer.
If you could feel my heart beat now,
It would hit you like a sledgehammer.
You’re taken over the beat of my body.
You just don’t let up, don’t let up.
You’re taken over the beat of my body.
But you lift me up, lift me up.
If you take my pulse right now,
It would feel just like a sledgehammer.
So close together, so far apart.
You’re turning me on,
And my fires waiting for your spark.
I struggle to contain,
The love that’s in my veins,
And how it circulates.
If you could take my pulse right now,
It would feel just like a sledgehammer.
If you could feel my heart beat now,
It would hit you like a sledgehammer.
You’re taken over the beat of my body.
You just don’t let up, don’t let up.
You’re taken over the beat of my body.
But you lift me up, lift me up.
If you take my pulse right now,
It would feel just like a sledgehammer.
The truth is out, no stopping now.
I’m getting closer.
I’ve had enough, undress my love.
I’m coming over.
If you could take my pulse right now,
It would feel just like a sledgehammer.
Ooooh
If you take my pulse right now,
It would feel like a sledgehammer.
Hammer, Hammerrrr
If you take my puuuulse
If you could take my pulse right now,
It would feel just like a sledgehammer.
If you could feel my heart beat now,
It would hit you like a sledgehammer.
You’re taken over the beat of my body.
You just don’t let up, don’t let up.
You’re taken over the beat of my body.
But you lift me up, lift me up.
If you take my pulse right now,
It would feel just like a sledgehammer.
She finished strumming, “Well I hope you enjoyed it. Remember, love only.”
Lauren heard a voice clear their throat behind her, “Excuse me, Miss Jauregui the plane is ready.”
“Thank you,” she replied getting up from her seat. She went outside towards the plane, and tweeting something before getting on.
@LaurenJauregui: Listen to @KC_LoveOnly ’s new cover. I’m in love! 😍 I think you’ll like the song choice. She’s amazing, follow her!!
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4R’s: Encantadia (Jan. 27, 2017 week-ender episode review)
Episode 140
Recap:
The most painful goodbye
Ybrahim mourned for the death of his beloved queen, Alena came to him and explained her side. That she did everything she can to stop Amihan and in her place, but it was Amihan who did not allow this to happen which resulted to the queen’s demise, Alena knew how much Ybrahim loves Amihan and apologized, she never wanted them to suffer like this. Ybrahim appreciated Alena’s efforts and thanked her for attempting to save Amihan, it will be difficult, but they have to accept the fact that Amihan is gone forever. Alena and Ybrahim comforted each other and decided to go back to prepare for Amihan’s funeral.
The diwatas, Sapirians, and Adamyans who remained faithful to Amihan were all saddened by the queen’s passing, even the mandirigmas and barbaros were also present. Wahid gave his condolences to Lira and Mira. When the sang’gres and Ybrahim arrived, the ceremony began. The first to lament was Alena who expressed guilt over what happened, but recalled that at the end of the day, she remained a loving sister and a noble leader to everyone. Pirena remembered Amihan to be a humble and forgiving sister, a selfless queen who always think of others first before herself. It was evident that Danaya’s loyalty will be with Amihan until the very end and tearfully bid goodbye to her queen. Mira as well bid farewell to the mother who raised her. A heartbroken Ybrahim kissed his beloved queen goodbye. Lira didn’t say much, but told her mother that she loves her and sang the song she always sings for Amihan. Lira’s song broke the hearts of many, especially after recalling their memories of the late queen. Not long after, the retres arrived and hovered over Amihan’s corpse and vanished along with the dead queen. By the time Aquil reached the camp, the funeral rites was already over. It was confirmed that Amihan is really dead. In honor of the late queen, Aquil slit his own hand and let the blood ooze and drip into the ground—a gesture to pay respect to the queen which Danaya appreciated.
Why Amihan chose to die
Lireo and Sapiro has fallen, now all that’s left to do is to kill the remaining encantados in Amihan’s side and rule over Encantadia. But what puzzled Agane is that why did Amihan allowed herself to die when she has all the opportunity to escape. Agane suspected that Amihan must be planning on something against Hagorn. Seeing Agane’s point, Hagorn called on Asval and Amarro about the Hadezars’ weakness, Amarro revealed that the gods are capable of eliminating them, or, as Hagorn guessed--another ivtre. It was a smart move if Amihan really did that to become an ivtre herself, Hagorn knew they have to act now before Amihan returns and defeat them.
Hush, Lira
The death of Amihan weighed heavily on Lira. She bitterly questioned Amihan’s love for her, because if she does she would have thought about her and would never do such thing. Ybrahim instilled to Lira’s mind that her mother loves very much and explained that the reason why Amihan did that so that she’ll become an ivtre and fight Hagorn’s forces. Lira’s hopes somehow sparked after hearing the possibility of Amihan coming back [even] as a soul, Ybrahim can never be sure for it is Emre who can answer that. But he too hoped Amihan will return for like Lira, he also miss Amihan so much and still wants to see her, hug her (and be with her). Father and daughter mourned for their loss. Alena and Danaya came not long after, the sisters were concerned over Lira. Danaya asked if the diwani was feeling better, Lira answered she was but immediately left, it was clear she didn’t want to talk to her Ashtis yet. Danaya knew Lira was still mad at her, Ybrahim told her to understand her niece for she still hasn’t accepted her mother’s death. Alena understood how Lira feels and sympathized with their loss and hoped that they will all heal from the pain Amihan’s death caused them. Ybrahim left, and Pirena came and informed her sisters that the council were already asking about Amihan’s last will. Danaya already has it and so is the air gem, what they didn’t know was Agane already found out where they were and immediately went back to Hathoria to tell her king about the diwatas’ whereabouts.
Writing her own destiny
Amihan woke up only to find herself in Devas, there she was welcomed by Muyak, who has now fully grown thanks to Emre’s blessing. Muyak informed her that they are now at the entrance of Emre’s home. Muyak was about to bid goodbye and return to Encantadia when Amihan stopped her and told her to wait for her for she wasn’t planning to stay in Devas for too long. Amihan heard a voice telling her to enter the palace. Emre warmly welcomed her and commended her act of valor and even addressed her as the Great Queen of the Diwatas, because of this, Emre gave Amihan a place to stay in Devas—the same place where Raquim and Mine-a are staying. It was an honor for Amihan to finally meet the god of the diwatas, and as much as Amihan wanted to see her parents once again, she has to fulfill her promise and return to Encantadia, Amihan asked a favor to Emre to let her return to the world of the living. Because of Amihan’s bravery and kind heart, Emre immediately granted her request, the lines in Amihan’s palms suddenly vanished which means that fate cannot dictate her anymore and she will be the one who will write her own destiny, that also means Amihan is now free to go back to Encantadia.
Raves:
💜 Emre! So much feels tonight! I knew everyone will be crying their hearts out but when Mikee sang Lira’s “Sa Pangarap Lang,” bam! My tears started falling, and the series of flash backs about their fond memories of Amihan was just so hard to watch. I like that Lira didn’t speak that much and just told Amihan straight away that she loves her, the song spoke everything Lira has to say to her mother: there was the love she will always have for Amihan and at the same time, pain because her lifelong dream of being with her mother is short-lived and will now remain a dream. I think this scene justified Lira’s signature song way better than the 2005 version and I love every bit of it!
💪 Well, we have a stand-out performer tonight! When Lira sang that song I was already weeping, and then I saw Ybrahim cry and yes, I broke down after seeing him. I was so blown away by Ruru’s performance that I actually thought that he wasn’t acting anymore. Ybrahim didn’t show much emotions on the previous episode and suppressed whatever he felt that time for he has to be strong for his daughter and his people. But courage and vulnerability are two different things. It just shows that even the bravest can also break down, I have never seen Ybrahim so vulnerable and weak, and hands down to Ruru for nailing that scene, as an Encantadik, I am so proud of him, he has come a long way from being “boy pabebe” to an excellent, manly and not to mention more mature actor, and also I don’t think I commended him enough for slaying that father role to think that he and Mikee are of the same age. Great job Rehav! I am now fully convinced that Ruru Madrid IS Rehav Ybrahim! And he’s ready to be in line with the country’s award-winning actors!
💙 Yes! Amihan 2016/2017 paying homage to Amihan 2005’s death. Actually this kind of death makes more sense than the 2005 version and Amihan has really proven that she deserves to have a second life and create her own story. Unlike before where she was informed by Avilan that she’s dead and Amihan just firmly told him that she will never leave Encantadia or something like that, and then ta-daaa! Second life! Also, I noticed that Ybrahim, Lira and Amihan are now living their second lives, so “A family that dies together stays together” ang peg ng royal fam? Hahahaha! Kidding! I’m just so glad that Amihan’s story will not end here and did y’all see her new warrior costume courtesy of Emre? That. Is. So. Cool!
💧 Ha! I knew Kahlil will be back! Beshie @9ri and I have been exchanging DMs today and hoped that there will be a side quest for Lira, Mira and Kahlil for these three didn’t really have the chance to bond because they all died in the finale of book 1. I hope the three will embark on a journey to Balaak and seal the “gates of death” (I like to call it that way). It will also be of big help for Lira and Mira 2.0 to be born.
Rants: No rants, all love
Best performer for this episode: Ruru Madrid 🗡
Rating: 10 out of 10 💎s
Week-ender thoughts: This has been a really heart-breaking week and not to mention so stressful af with all these Kylie Padilla leaving the show because she’s preggy. But I am glad everything is settled now, and Amihan is staying. I have to commend the team for taking good care of Kylie, she’s pretty much in good shape and is still ready to kick some ass despite being preggy. I hope Kylie will have an easy pregnancy though. And I am so glad that DMR did not break his promise of not replacing Kylie in the show, definitely looking forward for a new chapter next week. Btw, Direk posted a screen shot of Amihan saving Ybrahim and telling Asval, “Huwag mong sasaktan ang mahal kong prinsipe,” my ghaaad! I’ll wait for that. And also the DanQuil proposal! OMFG! Kahlil is also back, fingers crossed for that side quest. And I guess the best news of all is that Encantadia will have a fourth installment! That’s really great and I’m looking forward for that. This week has truly been a roller coaster ride for the fandom and the show but I am happy this week ended well, great job Team Encantadia!
Overall best performer for this week: Kylie Padilla 🌪
Overall rating: 10 out of 10💎s
Photo credits: From Twitter: @GMAEncantadia (Encantadia 2016 official twitter acct) @gmanetwork (GMA network); official website: gmanetwork.com @GMADrama (GMA Drama)
From Facebook: Encantadia 2016
Video credits: gmanetwork.com via YouTube & dailymotion
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