#no i dont care i spelled his name wrong in the meme

[guineapigwitch]

[mads-is-a-bit-strange]

“You can’t skip chapters, that’s not how life works. You have to read every line, meet every character. You won’t enjoy all of it. Hell, some chapters will make you cry for weeks. You will read things you don’t want to read, you will have moments when you don’t want the pages to end. But you have to keep going. Stories keep the world revolving. Live yours, don’t miss out.”

- Pillow Thoughts 2 by Courtney Peppernell (found the quote on pinterest)

Hi here’s my intro post>>>

Here's what you'll find here that will hopefully pique your interest☟

~Art

~Stories (fandoms or stories im writing myself)

~memes

~vents/updates (they are really fuckin random but stay with me on this)

~reblogs

Here's some things abt me☟

Name: Madeleine

Nicknames: mads, maddie, marie, mad, maggie, em, juniper, daisy, linnie (now, some might be names of my hearttypes ngl)

Age: minor‼️

Pronouns: she/they

Sexuality: Bisexual, Demigirl/Non-binary

mbti test results: ENFJ-T (main character vibes😝✌️)

aura color: blue💙💙💙

Now some random facts abt me☟

♡here are my ocs accounts!!

@the-giver3

@b3c0m3-insan3

@lemme-die-rq666

@bibi-hates-u2

@sun-and-moon888

@talkingisntrllymything

💛i listen to music more than i should…(specifically my musical playlist with way to much heathers😆)

💛baby witch (i havent done any spells before but i do tarot a lot)

💛i love all of my friends <333 Im so lucky to have them and i would literally die for them❤️❤️❤️❤️and my mutuals idk how the hell i got those but i’m very grateful

💛i’m otherhearted!!! i have multiple hearttypes and my main ones right now are prob German Shepherd and Raccoon :3

💛cabin 10!!! (aphrodite)💗🐚

🩷 “this is modern feminism talking” “i expect to rule the world in shoes i cannot walk in”🩷

💛"Everyone's pushing, everyone's fighting. Storms are approaching, there's nowhere to hide. If i say the wrong thing, or i wear the wrong outfit, they'll throw me right over the side. On the tiniest lifeboat."💛

💞V, K, H, C, E, A, B, J, E, E, A, S, L💞

🇵🇸river to sea, palestine will be free🇵🇸

💛Fandoms☟

Owl house, Craig of the Creek, Superstore, Gravity Falls, Amphibia, Big Bang Theory, She-Ra, Adventure Time, Hazbin Hotel, Helluva Boss, PJO, etc. (ik ik i’m a nerd)

💛I do theatre and student council

💛DNI: DMs (im not allowed to talk to strangers online but if ik u irl then u can dm, or if you want to ask a simple question), Transphobes, homophobes, racist ppl, Z00s, N@Z!/neo-N@Z!, s3xists, p0rn bots (im a fucking minor), p3d0s, nsfw.

💛Links☟

𖤐Pinterest

𖤐Spotify

𖤐Tumblr Community

𖤐My post about my series i’m working on

𖤐The first chapter of The Killer Circus!

𖤐Decorate my tree for Xmas!!

𖤐My userboxes are here: (im still working on it so i dont have a link 😔😔😔 srry)

Just remember that you are amazing <3 Like literally the best and i know that hearing that from a total stranger may sound crazy and creepy, but i genuinely care about my friends and mutuals. Have fun here, so yeah byeeee :]

[volfoss]

how about ranking bucciarati's team?

regret to inform you that ur gonna get a very long answer bc i have passionate feelings about them all! also trish is in this bc she is part of the team and no one will tell me otherwise and will also include some rambling bc it is me and i have so many feelings towards these characters and none of them r cohesive

under the cut just in case (post writing yes it was long)

Giorno Giovanna:

way way more complex than ppl normally give him credit for (i will not go into feelings on how a majority of the fandom treats him unless ppl want me to then i will in fact make a very long ranty post and will not be stopped)

mildly op (esp at the beginning with how hes kind of able to just use his stand really well w no problems altho i think thats true of most of the jojos that we have seen animated?)

i am emotionally attached to him and want to give him a big hug

hes just a kinda goofy kid and is maybe a bit not good with figuring out hey this is a semi dangerous situation maybe i shouldnt be taunting him (leaky eye luca for example)

has the actual best theme

i love how he works off the rest of the team so well (even w members who do not like him)

is in my top 3 jojos i love this kid sm i would adopt him if he was real

7/10

Bruno Bucciarati:

the fucking way his character develops from licky man to best dad material is my favorite thing

his outfit is so so so good i would die to wear it

in general this man is one of my fave jojos characters and i get a lot of comfort from him

hes just really neat and has a good taste in music

he did his fucking best and i will always love him for that

imo the way that his death was drawn out was genuinely one of the most heartbreaking deaths in the entire series and fucks me up each time i think of it

i feel like he really is the one to hold the team together in a way that everyone feels cared for and saved

def has a savior complex tho for sure

dilf but im ace

also manga superiority bc he either makes the stupidest faces or looks very nice (anime has a lot of weird animation in regards to his face) and also because its lingerie there instead of a tattoo that changes thickness and placement every second

10/10

Leone Abbacchio:

guilty pleasure liking man

i am obsessed with his vibes and wish to become him

i cannot physically express just how much i love him but hes one of my faves of all time (not obvious by my theme at all wdym)

i miss his manga palette but also the colored manga isnt my beloved but also black lipstick abba

hot take maybe but anime abba looks better than manga minus the lipstick debacle

hes so so tall and i will steal his height in a nice way

his past man his past it fucks me up

his death fucks me up normally but when i was rewatching recently, i saw he gave this tiny lil smile after helping the kids get their ball and i could not take it anymore

him and brunos relationship (canonically and out of canon too) is one of my favorites in the series

also fandom hot take as i guess i am doing those for everyone- but ppl either have him as cosntantly trying to murder giorno or being like good son and v out of character, and it is really weird? not sayign that ill do better when i write them but also like im convinced some ppl havent seen the show or smth

i will steal both him and bruno and marry them both <3

this man is beloved i love him to death

10/10

Pannacotta Fugo:

i cannot spell his first name to save my life

also fandom take- ppl make him constantly only angry boy all the time and it really irks me. ik araki did not give him 2 much to work w in terms of canon personality but its frustrating

the light novel purple haze feedback is so so so good and adds sm to his character and i really like it for that!

fugo is one of those that imo deserves a lot and didnt get that

genuinely the vibes between how he treats narancia is v interesting to me, like its clear he cares about nara but nara not doing great w math really frustrates him

i love their interactions and how he is genuinely a kind person at times

the manga colors r superior here, my strawberry boy <3

i just really love and appreciate him a lot and wish that ppl gave him more love

i keep getting assigned him on kin quizzes

very smart good boy

ALSO ok fugo did not do any wrong by leaving

unsure if thats a hot take but i genuinely dont blame the character one bit for leaving and again purple haze feedback really delves into that and why he did it

if ur a fugo fan go read it

his past is really upsetting esp in the anime i will cry over it

his stand is adorable and i wanna hug it

his vibes r fun and i wanna gift him strawberry dangly earrings

8/10

Narancia Ghirga:

this boy i am also adopting (i am adopting most of them sorry)

i really hate how ppl act as if hes stupid bc bad math skills do not equal stupid like did ppl not see the fight w formaggio??

the way he just fucking dove into the water after the boat and how brunos face went all soft and happy it will never not make me cry

he is constnatnly making me wanna cry if i think too much about him for 2 seconds i love him sm

how can anyone not adore him when he set an entire street on fire yk

hes just happy despite his past and it makes me sad i love nara sm

torture dance is one of my favorite memes from the show

ALSO ok the way he died so suddenly absolutely broke me bc the remaining team members r really just seeing everyone die in front of them so quickly

his goofy and laid back moments r my fave

i love just how loyal and caring he is to his friends

his stand is really cool and again the fight w formaggio was so fun to watch

8/10

Guido Mista:

probably my least favorite member of the team for a semi good reason:

the jokes towards trish are really really uncomfy and how fugo doesnt wanna be involved but he is pushing him to do something that makes him uncomfortable did not make me like him a lot

hes goofy but not goofy enough for me to be ok with the repeated jokes about that esp in the body swap episode (ik it was supposed to be funny but it just felt off)

his vibes r good but i wish we got to see his hair

the fandom interpretation is normally pretty good of him overall?

despite not loving him a lot, i really enjoying writing for him (one day might open up headcanon requests or smth but unsure)

hes someone id wanna watch movies w but his taste in movies and mine r very different

love how he and his stand get along

honestly has very very good comedic potential

i really like how he and giorno interact as the series goes on (in a platonic way i need to clarify that i love their friendship)

again him in purple haze feedback was really interesting

probably a 5/10?

Trish Una:

beloved and deserved better

her first outfit in the manga > outfit in the anime

actually in general i believe in manga trish superiority like her hair in the manga looks so cool

her stand her stand her stand i love sm

if u dont include trish in the group i am murdering u <3

HER CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!!! IS SO GOOD!!!!!!

fandom gripe is how people either pretend she does not exist or has the trish first introduction thing where shes using her defense mechanisms and acting a bit spoiled

OK but her in purple haze feedback!!! mild spoilers but how bruno was taking care of her post the ending of vento aureo makes me so happy each time i think of it

very mad that she canonically didnt really get an ending and yet again PHF my beloved actually gave her that

how spice girl starts out as a stand thats helping her thru a very stressful situation is so cool and i love it

DAD BRUNO DAD BRUNO DAD BRUNO *frothes at the mouth*

but more seriously how she leans on bruno and begins 2 trust him and nearly point blank is referring to him as a father figure always fucks me up

esp because of the resulting fight afterwards

and the very ending of the arc that ends w bruno being like bye gonna go in the clouds and look ethereal now, oh man it makes me so sad

bc giorno is the only one that knew what happened and people that were closer to bruno due to knowing him longer didnt

i wanna see how trish coped w that personally

despite being introduced not at the beginning i think her arc and character in general were as well paced as it could be!

9/10

finally done! sorry that took so long but oh man i have so many feelings towards these guys its not even funny

[elecman108]

Man, I forgot to post 90% of my art here for the past while. I’m gonna do an art dump in this post under the cut. Enjoy the bonk emoji if you don’t click the read more, and man am I dumb and forgetful lmao.

Includes: OCs getting names, a Sonic impression, a D&D map, homosexual energies, a sheep floating in the astral sea, a birthday drawing I already posted, Hex Maniac Ender, D&D Characters, D&D Characters as Miis in Miitopia, Little Hater Axel, local Demon in the consciousness of my D&D character yelling at him, illegal plants, a necromancer being cute, an actual event that happened in a D&D game two days ago, and Mermay drawing.

That’s everything in here as a TL;DR, I guess. Enjoy your day!

I’m gonna try and sort of have them in chronological order, oldest first, but I may end up putting them in the wrong order. If I do... Whoops, I guess?

[04/14/21] - This isn’t really new art, but I started to work on giving the four OCs of mine without a full name full names... I have not finished this bit, though. So Hunter and Akira have full names, and Warlock and Assassin only have temporary names. This may end up like Seven where I put in their names as a temporary name (7th OC I’d made at that time) and it just kind of... sticks. Lmao.

[04/20/21] - Alone on a Friday Night? God, you’re pathetic. I didn’t colour this one because it was a half-attempt at a meme image I still like it, though, so I might end up colouring it. It’s gonna appear again whenever I do my “unfinished drawings art dump” at some point probably in... June? I know I said I’d post them last month but forget it, lmao, it’ll happen eventually.

[04/20/21] - A D&D Map! This was to help me visualize the layout of my D&D character’s ship he used to be on. Also for my DM if they ever put us aboard the ship. The little fella in the corner is just there to vibe. This map is made of free to use assets from This Website, so while I’m gonna say DONT USE MY MAP WITHOUT PERMISSION, feel free to make your own!

[04/26/21] - Lesbian Day of Visibility drawing of yours truly, the disapointment! That’s... really all I have to say about this, honestly. It was just for that one day and that was it, lmao. I mean, I accidentally lined it in dark pink, so.. .That’s different, I guess?

[04/30/21] - Do Astral Seas dream of Ensorcled Sheep? Does the City know what Sheepleb is going to do? What crimes he may commit? Who knows! This was fan art of Critical Role ep. 134 if I remember correctly, right at the end when they jumped into the portal into the astral sea and Caleb was a sheep. Using my knowledge of the German language, I knew the word for “shit”, and had to use it.

[05/07/21] - This was already posted, but it’s going in here to dilinuate that it was drawn at this point. Also, aside from playing Miitopia, this is all I have to show for myself until the 12th.

[05/12/21] - Hex Maniac Ender challenges you to a Pokemon Battle! WIll you win against my team? My sis, who loves fairy types, pointed out to me that there’s a fairy girl and hex maniac duo, so I’d be the hex maniac. I spent... Over a week drawing this, because I basically had to redraw the Hex Maniac art from scratch in a higher quality size, and then draw myself over it. So... You can excuse the low-effort background for once. It was basically this, and then my birthday doodle from May 1st to May 12th, and then I took a break to draw up several D&D characters quickly for fullbody references.

[05/12/21] - Remember this art I made several months ago? I finally added my other two completed characters! I have three more named but without character sheet D&D characters, so for now this is just Kara, Axel, Golden Shadow, Kau, Cecillia, and Miri. Kress, Tempest, and Melia will have to wait until I make character sheets for them to be posted, and... For when I probably make more D&D characters. I have at least 9 additional, incomplete character ideas floating around, so... I’m never gonna be done this art, huh?

[05/12/21] - Speaking of D&D characters, did you know I’ve been making them as Miis in Miitopia? So here is their finished full body art next to their Miitopia self! Some of them look a little off (Golden Shadow, Cecillia) because of limitations of the editor and shading issues, some of them look a little off (Kau, Kress) because this is a human face canvas that I’m using to make a non-human face, and some of them (Melia, Axel) look REALLY GOOD. Common traits among my D&D characters include green eyes and tall. You wanna know why? Because I am tall and... despite having red eyes, I do have green eyes under the coloured contacts.

[05/15/21] - More D&D stuff! This is based around my D&D group’s current Rime of the Frostmaiden campaign where our Goliath Fighter, Nioh, ends up getting a little bit of hate for being cocky, and our little (well over 6′) hater, Axel, is just a man full of irritation. These are the tallest two characters of the group at the moment. Someone send help. Nioh belongs to one of the other D&D players, Axel (and his stupid additude) belongs to me.

[05/15/21] - This is what me playing D&D feels like. Me, the demon entity trapped inside the head of my D&D character, yelling at them to do things while the dice decide that they’re gonna get bopped a hundred times by a yeti and somehow still survive. This is also a reference to our first or second game where I just ran off like sixty feet to one side of the battle map to fight a Crag Cat and was just in Gay Baby Jail until like two turns later when I could run back to the others. I also drew him not in his winter gear even though this is a bit from when we were atop Kelvin’s Carin in an icy cave, so maybe that’s why he’s at low HP.

[05/15/21] - Melia has good gardening tips, such as Use A Mars Mii Trap To Hide A Body Because They Are Endangered And It Is Illegal To Dig Them Up. I love her a lot, because she’s the youngest of four, all four sisters based around the different seasons. She’s based around Autumn, so she’s all orange and yellow and brown and is so cute. Also she’s Chaotic Neutral, as if she didn’t need to be mildly more threatening.

[05/15/21] - Cecillia is my Tiefling gal who lived in a very northern town plagued by cold weather and snow, and Axel is my Pirate guy who spent most of his time further south on the high seas and warmer weather. So, naturally... I’ll use the guy more acclimatized to the hotter weather in the campaign where we spend 99% of it in the snow. She uses Tarot Cards as her spell focus, and I decided to sneak my other D&D characters onto her Tarot cards so naturally, Axel is The Hanged Man, given his backstory and personality. She’s a very cheerful and friendly Tiefling Necromancer of the Hexblade, so she’d for sure take care of those around her to ensure their success. Especially if they’re on her Tarot Cards, and their spirit comes to her aid when she asks for them.

[05/16/21] - Content Warning; Ryma thinks too much into local stupid moron’s lack of knowing how to answer a question and thinks too much into the reputation of Pirates. Poor Axel, man doesn’t know how to socialize with people who aren’t pirates and is used to being hostile towards everyone, so when he’s asked a question that his answer to is “uhh... no?”, he panics and ends up making a mistake that leads him to think that Ryma can read his mind. Ryma belongs to another of the D&D players. I guess me drawing all those spicy Cow Costumed OCs earlier just brought me to drawing Axel being a bottom in this, huh?

[05/16/21] - It’s Mermay, which means more OC drawings! Here’s Theo after drinking some potion that turned him into a mermaid, and Seven, tiredly, collecting his stupid boyfriend so that Lailah can fix the fact he’s turned into a mermaid. Mer!Theo is based around his sword’s colours of indigo-purple with red accents, which looks a little weird since Theo is the Blue one of the group, but... it looks cool, I guess. Seven’s just the same outfit as always, just no gloves this time.

--

And that’s it for the art dump! This was, frankly, MASSIVE. I’ll try and remember to upload both on Twitter and Tumblr at the same time, but... Ah... I have been drawing a fair bit. Just mostly sketches and linework that I haven’t finished and may not actually finish. If they’re not completed, I’ll dump them all into something at the end of the month or whatever. Maybe you’ll get the old sketch of the Axel face in panel 3 because in the sketch phase it was an Ahegao face, in the clean sketch it was a lip bite, and in the linework and final it’s just horny face. lmao.

Top ten things I have to remember for drawing: AXEL HAS A SCAR AND GREEN EYES. I remember his eye colour now, but if you look at his fullbody ref, he’s got brown eyes. And, naturally, I keep forgetting to put in his scar. He has more, but most of them are located in areas covered by his clothes. So if I ever draw him shirtless I guess I’ll have to place them somewhere.

Also maybe finish the reference sheets I have left to finish so I can post more of them, since I have two “Pets” completed (Roko and Mona’s nameless pet), but I have to do up Hunter, Warlock, Assassin, Akira, Myuut, and Stella. I’m betting when I do complete two more, it’ll be Hunter and Akira. Those two are the most fun to draw, at least.

[early-sxnsets]

No Wait Unblock Me

Archive Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18215168/chapters/43133210

Chapter 2/10 of It’s A Handheld Disaster

Word Count: 1580

Chapter Summary: Simon and Baz finally get to "mutuals" status.

BAZ

For the third time today, I see a similar notification slide through my drop down.

bi-sammy sent you a picture

Part of me initially wants to sigh, roll my eyes, and swipe it away, because apparently part of me wishes to be alone for the rest of my life. Thankfully, the reasonable, tiny sliver of my mind makes sure I don’t make such a mistake.

Given the situation, one would think we’d parted ways. He makes a post, we stop the argument, all is fair in fandom and war. Except, now I believe Snow has grown under an impression that after one exchange, it qualifies us for somewhat of a friendship, and therefore reason to send me memes. Don’t get me wrong, memes are a fantastic waste of time and barely a waste of energy, but it’s strange that he’s not fucking off like most people.

Maybe I’m used to others being scared of me.

Maybe I’m used to others following my tactics of scaring them away.

Whatever I’ve done hasn’t worked, since this arse is immune to my attempts at coldness and mild animosity. I’m starting to suspect there’s something genuinely wrong with him, like he doesn’t get enough love and attention.

Guess that makes two of us.

I guess I somewhat crave this friendship. I’ll speak the truth to that and say yes, I smile when his memes pop up. They’re almost always fandom, and definitely made on Photoshop. This one, I see as I tap and let it load, is the crudely drawn Kirby graphic shoving burgers into his mouth, but over Kirby is photoshopped a picture of Huxley’s face and the burgers are Sam's ass.

It’s all poorly done and, sadly, extremely endearing.

My thumbs hover over my keyboard, cheeks creasing as I stare down at the picture. I lay back against my pillows, the curtains drawn and my hair pulled out of my face. It’s quite lonely; my life’s a sterile mixture of quarantined education and age old settled dust in my ancient room. It’s nice to have his somewhat obnoxious messages pop onto my screen, but it feels so odd. So foreign, and barely understood.

I want to understand.

gaystrell: why are you still messaging me?

I get an answer not even a minute later.

bi-sammy: do you want me to stop?

I don’t even hesitate to send out a reply, feeling a steadily growing lump in my throat, choking me mindless.

gaystrell: no.

bi-sammy: then why did you ask?

gaystrell: i just

gaystrell: don’t get it

bi-sammy: get what?

gaystrell: why you’d want to talk to me

bi-sammy: because youre cool

gaystrell: vexing me won’t get you “street cred”, if that’s what you’re after

bi-sammy: shit no wait that’s not what i meant

bi-sammy: dont block me fukc wait

bi-sammy: id just meant that you wrote all that shit and i thought it was really cool and

bi-sammy: i dont know

bi-sammy: i thought we could be friends since you did all that

bi-sammy: ill stop if you want me to

gaystrell: calm down you’re clogging my notifs

gaystrell: do that again and i /will/ block you

gaystrell: but………. if you actually do want to be friends i suppose i’m willing to give forth a little attention

bi-sammy: im osrry i dont speak posh cunt

gaystrell: too bad, blocked

bi-sammy: no wait unblock me

gaystrell: fine last chance

bi-sammy: bitch

gaystrell: b l o c k e d

bi-sammy: no but,,,,,,, i do want to be friends

I’m smiling like a fucking loon, scrolling through our brief exchange. It’s strange. Most people aren’t upfront about wanting to talk, or wanting someone to talk with. Wanting a friend, even. I have the people follow me and ask me questions, and of that only a small handful of those who actually interact eith me (and even in that, we usually only speak to give each other a helping hand).

And despite that, here’s someone who wants to try.

I suck my lower lip into my mouth, trying to think of my course of actions.

There’s a simple one I can take now (and probably should’ve taken as an initiative). I click his icon, and click “Follow” on his page.

It doesn’t take very long before I get a notification come through, starting that he mentioned me in a post.

It isn’t very long, but it gets its point across in the best way possible. It’s just a mobile screenshot, reading “gaystrell started following bi-sammy” with a quick caption.

god himself entered the groupchat. how do i block him?

SIMON

I wonder what it’d be like to see me in the moment. It’s a real shame Penn wasn’t around to capture it, since I’m in the middle of French class, but I must’ve smiled so stupidly that it caught the attention of the professor. He gave me a stern look until I set down my mobile.

The moment he turned away, I opened it back up and grinned.

At first, I didn’t believe what I was seeing. Him. Following me.

Us. Mutuals. Mutuals.

Of course I had to screenshot and post as a brag (barely humble, more metaphorically sucking my own knob for all my followers to see). Nobody really cares, as expected.

Well, nobody except the single message from none other than Mr. Bitch.

gaystrell: blocked. unfollowed. reported. waste of space.

My smile creases back my cheeks as they flush pink. I send back a quick message before turning my mobile over, foot tapping double the speed of the analogue on the wall.

bi-sammy: ;)

BAZ

He winked. Interesting.

I’m out of breath.

Fuck?

I lay my phone flat away from me, face down as I squint at my wall. I should respond in a composed fashion. I have to be clever, and not one-upping him is never an option. After all, does this qualify as flirting? Friendly banter? What am I doing with this random fucking bloke that I don’t even have a face to put to?

He’s my age. Roughly. Yes?

I check his tumblr again, as if I hadn’t just read his bio earlier.

simon // he/him // 17 // hold my fucking hand (please)

Maybe he’s just straight and I’m misreading it. Yes. Probably. Aren’t most people straight? Is that still a fact? (I highly doubt it, given how boring that must be.) But he winked at me. Somewhat prompted, I’ll give him that, but it was still a fucking wink.

I wink in texts to Dev and Niall too, though, but that’s different, isn’t it? I’d never snog either of them (especially fucking Dev), but hey. If unfaced internet boy asked for a snog, would I?

I’m too wrapped up and starved for human interaction to properly deal with this.

gaystrell: i will carry on with my threats, snow

There it is. Perfectly biting, while not being entirely rejecting. Maybe I’m better at this than I thought.

Or, perhaps, I’m worse, because even an hour and a half after sending the text, he’s silent.

I remind myself every few minutes that he most likely attends an actual school and has classes, but it makes my chest ache in the most unfair way every time my mobile tempts me with an unrelated notification.

I work myself to the point of moping down in the kitchen, slumping against the fridge whilst watching Vera make tea. She’s relatively silent, knowing better than anybody to leave me to sulk.

“You’re a drama queen,” she tuts, looking over me. Granted, I dress like a slob and borderline haunt this godforsaken mansion, but I feel as though that makes me entitled to being the way I am.

“I’m lonely,” I sigh, head resting against the fridge. It hums beside me, the chromed metal cooling my cheek. “Am I not granted a dramatic spell every now and then?”

“Not unprovoked.”

I set a hand against the handle, then let it drop. I’m not hungry. “What if it was provoked?”

“Is it?”

Instinctively, I pull out my phone and click it on. Nothing. “Perhaps.”

Vera frowns at me, walking over and setting a hand on my arm. “What’s wrong? Are you feeling okay?”

My eyes slowly roll as I push myself off the appliance, standing upright. “Physically, yes. Don’t fuss. It’s just… online shit.”

“You spend too much time on the phone,” she sighs, letting go and going back to the tea as she fixes me a mug. “Don’t you think you’d be happier to disconnect from social media for a day or two? Go on a walk, see nature?”

I snort, looking outside. “And what? Trip and bust open my knee? That’d wind me back up in care for at least a few days.”

“You act like you’re made of paper and glass.” She offers over my mug, letting my fingers wind around the handle before she shakes her head.

“I might as well be,” I huff down before thanking her and blowing on my tea.

Once I leave back up to my room, I realise it's somehow more depressing in here over the kitchen with Vera’s disapproval of technology rantings. At least she’s some sort of company.

As I’m sipping my tea, I go back to scrolling on my laptop as a notif pops up, jarring me with the sound but letting me breathe again.

bi-sammy: why do you know my last name smh

I exhale slowly, smiling to myself.

gaystrell: you commented on my google doc, you idiot

[wolves-on-caffeine]

Love bites

Whats this? A fic for you? Yep!

Hope you enjoy!

Warning: blood, agrument at end

Logan was hungry, very hungry.

Normally he kept his hunger under control, but he hadnt been able to eat and was starving.

He was desperate.

So when he saw a hooded figure walking alone past an alleyway, he grabbed them.

“Sorry.” Passed logan’s lips as he shoved the hoodie sleeve up and bit into the strangers wrist.

Logan removed his fangs as quickly as he inserted them and spit out the blood. “Whst the fuck is that?!”

The hooded figured held their wrist. “Shouldnt i be asking you that?”

Logan looked at the guy- yes that was a guy- and had to take a second to compose himself. He was….quite attractive.

“Well yes, under the circumstances that would be expected, but in my defense, i am starving and would rather not taste your blood agian. How do you live with such…such…horrid blood in you?”

The guy stared at logan in disbelief. “Ok so..your a vampire im guessing.” Then crossed his arms.“and uh, rude,much? Im anemic.”

Logan ran the definition through his head quickly, and proceeded to take out iron supplements. “Take oen of these, wait are you on medicine alreasy? probably not with how your blood taste, ill make you a doctors appointment, i will,need your name.”

Hooded guy just stared at him. “No.” He gave a smirk.

“What do you mean no?” logan was confused, wouldn’t a human want to have good blood?

Hooded guy shrugged. “ I mean im not taking medicine, and im not going to a doctor. One, I’m broke, two, what are you going to do to make me? Bite me?”

Logan shoved the supplements at the hooded guy. “Name?”

“And im going to tell you, why?”

Logan gave a smile, “because i have your wallet?” and to prove so, he held it up.

Being a 200+ year old vampire means your good at pick pocketing.

“What? How did you- nevermind.” Hooded guy held out his hand for the wallet.

“Im Virgil. Virgil Bloodgood.”

Logan gave the wallet back and made a face.

“That is the most ironic name ever.”

_______

It had been a month since Logan bite Virgil, and yes, he did find a decent meal after words, but he visited Virgil every day.

Crawling through his apartment window, logan asked. “Did you go to your appointment today?”

Virgil looked up from his place at his desk, doing homework (logan found out he is a college student) and adjusted his hoodie.

“Oh my god Logan, can you not just use the door?”

Logan stood and and closed the window behind him. “I would, but you refuse to invite me in…luckily windows do not apply to that rule.”

Virgil just groaned and rolled across the floor in his chair. “No, i didnt go. You can’t make me.”

Logan sat on his bed. “Did you atleast get the cookbook I bought you?”

“Ah yes, "how to be delicious” the cookbook. Wonderful choice. Tell me, do you get this involved with all your meals?“ Virgil played with his bangs as if he didnt just imply the biggest insult of the century.

Virgil? Just a meal? Virgil who Logan, a vampire, has to force to sleep semi normal hours because he won’t sleep? Virgil who wears long sleeves and hoodies and socks and has 20 blankets on and is still cold? Virgil who dyed his hair purple and looks so adorable? Who shows Logan shows and ‘memes’ of the new world he doesnt understand?

Logan hadn’t know virgil long, but he is way more than 'a meal’ to Logan.

Of course, Virgil does not know that, nor need to know that.

"I only wish for you to be healthy. Your blood taste horrible, and it would not kill you to go to the doctors once to get meds and supplements to help. Also, if you ate atlleast normally instead of maybe once a day, I would back off a little, but if you insist on eating only once a day then it should at least be beneficial to you and include iron or -heaven forbid!- a actual food item instead of snacks and chocolate-”

That rant did not end soon.

______

4 more months and Logan and Virgil were friends(?) In a way at least.

Now Virgil was still stubborn about helping himself, but he was at least eating Proper meals, so long as logan made them (if you want me to eat, i don’t cook-ok, i’m cooking) which lead to logan moving in so he could cook when the sun was out.

But convincing Virgil lead to some….funny situations.

“Virgil, you need to eat! I made high iron food.”

“Not hungry.”

“Virgil, you need to eat.”

“Fine ill eat.”

“Rally? i thought it would be more of a fi-”

“If it is covered in garlic.”

“…You disgust me.” And Logan carefully put garlic on it.

___

Another time: Logan had been opening the curtains so Virgil could get some sun (he stood at the side, dont worry) and Virgil hissed and hid under hai bed.

“Oh my god Virgil, im the vampire, get out and enjoy the sunlight.”

“No, you can’t make me. Sunlight evil.”

“Althought i agree with that last statement, you need vitamin D.”

“Logan, I swear, if you want me to get vitamin D so much, ill go to the sunniest beach on the sunniest day in swim tunka just to avoid you.”

Logan laughed at him. “Please Virgil, no offense, but you? in a crowded beach? ” he laughed.

Virgil glared from the bed and moved to sit in the middle of the sun beam. “Ha, now you can’t touch me.”

Logan gave a fond smile to the back of Virgil and nodded. “Oh well”

_____

“I swear Logan, if you try to take me out to get sunlight in that sun hat of yours, i will go into the hall of mirrors and leave you there.”..Logan, who was wearing a daunting floppy sun hat so he could spend days with virgil outside, shook his head.

“Common misconception, but new mirrors show relections of vampires. It was only old mirrors that had silver backing to make it reflective that wont show reflections.”

Virgil had a evil look growing on his face. “Really now?” And went to the computer.

Logan walked over and looked,over his shoulder.“what are you looking up?”

Logan read the screen and gasped. “You wouldnt dare.”

Virgil grinned and hummed as he hit a picture. “I can afford that.”

“Virgil dont you dare hit that button!”

“Aaaaaand bought!”

That was how Virgil became the 'only’ proud owner of an antique silver backed mirror.

_____

Despite all the agruments, they did get along pretty well.

______

“Logan, what happened to the french in the 1800s?”

“Virgil, just because im over 200 years old doesnt mean i know everything.”

“Ok yeah but what happened?”

“Oh well what happened was-” and Virgil had an essay so good his teacher had him stay late to ask if he cheated. And he didn’t! Technically.

______

“Virgil, you forgot to do laundry again.”

“Oh shit, sorry, I forgot. You need your red polo tonight don’t you?”

“Don’t worry about it, i just wanted to inform you that i took care of it and you need not to worry about it. Also.” Logan threw a blandly at Virgil. “I put this in the dryer for a while. You enjoy when they are warm, do you not?”

Virgil cocooned himself instantly, and snuggled into the warm blanket.

“Your the best lo. What can i do to thank you?”

Logan gave him a smile, “maybe….go,to the doctors,tomorrow?”

Virgil,groaned but sighed. “One appointment! No,more.”

____

“Ok, so i say the meme,,you tel me what it means. Ready?”

Logan gave a determined nod. “Yes, i am ready.”

“Yeet.”

“To throw something, or a way to agree or show excitement.”

“Two bros.”

“Refers too two men who were in a hot tub at a large distance, who are not gay. A tragedy.”

Virgil laughed a bit. “Ok ok.. Free sha vacka do.”

“Fresh avocado spelled wrong, a 'mood’ if i am correct.”

Virgil gave Logan a high five. “You’re doing good, Logan!”

Logan smiled at Virgil. “Why thank you Virgil.”

_____

Virgil knocked on Logan’s door at 4 am.

Logan,opened in second, wide awake.

“Virgil? You should be-”

“Asleep? Yeah, but my room is cold, and I have a test at….3 pm today so I’m worrying.”

“Ah yes…may i ask how i am suppose to help?”

“Let ms sleep in your bed with you.”

Logan couldn’t fight the blush. “W..what?”

Virgil walked in and laid on his bed, messing up the perfect sheets as he did so. “I’m cold. Cuddle me.”

Logan stood at the door blushing. Ok so..sleep deprived Virgil is brave, no filter Virgil. Got it.

“I hate to disappoint, but i do not have a body heat to warm,you with,”

“Oh my god, are you going to cuddle me to not?”

Logan slid into the bed beside Virgil obediently and blushed. Virgil, as promise,d cuddled up to Logan and managed to get back to sleep.

Logan could not sleep. Not with the cuteness beside him, instead he carefully planted a kiss to the human’s forehead and smiled.

_____

“Are fangs sexy to vampires?”

Logan was..not expecting that. They were watching Steven Universe, when did fangs pop up?

“I..im sorry but..how did you come to this question?”

Virgil shrugged,sliding into the blankets more. “I’ve kinda been thinking about it for a while..cause you are pretty hot and..fangs add to that. So, as a human, i find fangs hot. But like..do other vampires find fangs hot?”

Logan stared at Virgil. He thought Logan was hot? Well perhaps…

“Well vampires do tend to see fangs as..flirtatious or..intimate…. I..personally..do prefer…flatter teeth myself.”

Virgil blushes and Logan could see the tip of a smile behind the blanket.

“Oh, ok.”

____

2 more months an Logan finally confessed. It was…messy.

Virgil and Logan had been having an argument over his need to have more iron, but it was..getting out of hand.

“I don’t want,to fucking eat that!”

“I know you like this food, you said this was your favorite and it is high in iron!”

"Why can’t you fuck off about my iron!“

"Why can’t you just eat without complaint for once!”

Virgil had grabbed Logan’s tie and pulled him down to eye level. “Will you stop treating me like I’m a fucking farm animal your waiting to chop up and eat! Quit treating me like your fucking meal!” Virgil had let go and backed up a bit, glaring daggers at the vampire.

Logan had to process everything. The argument, the closeness, the tie pulling,

'Your fucking meal!’ Rang in Logan’s head.

Logan grabbed Virgil by his hoodie and slammed his lips onto him, ignoring the tiny drops of blood he got from his and Virgil's lips alike (it was crushed kiss, fangs got in the way a bit)

Breaking the kiss, Logan glared. “You haven't been 'just a meal’ to me! Your sarcastic and honest and fucking gorgeous! You make my heart beat and my head spot working! I want you to eat and take care of yourself because i want you to be healthy, not so I can drink your blood! I love you Virgil, why can’t you see that!”

Virgil’s small squeak is what broke Logan out of it. He let go of his hoodie and backed away quickly, shock on his face.

“Virgil I..i am…"he took a breath, trying to force himself calm. "I apologize, my actions were not…they were uncalled for and I am Sorry I did that-”

“Did you mean it?”

“What?”

“Did you mean it when you said you loved me?”

Logan blushed and steeled himself, trying to prepare for the worse. He gave a nod. “I..I do love you Virgil…in a…romantic sense.”

Virgil seemed to relax a bit and rubbed on his bleeding lip. “Well…it would have been nice to be asked first, but….I’m glad.”

“Huh?”

Virgil walked over to Logan and grabbed his tie, gently pulling him in closer and giving him a soft kiss.

“Love you too.”

I loved this! Thank you so much!! I always love receiving fanfic, especially from you. ~S

[rqs902]

qcyn ep 11 -- can you believe the finale is tomorrow?!?

this whole texting section was so funnyyyy and i will honorably mention yet again that yao chi texting mc jin in english is so sweet

li ronghao torturing xu longhan iS HIALRIOSUS 

 but i also pity the poor child LOOL

wait can we talk about chen tao’s spelling timao LOL

and chen sijian’s face LOLLL

omg yao mingming’s message is so aww... he mentions liking yixing since he debuted in 2012.......

omgggg fjj and wang yi theyre all so cute and screamy and i loveee 

WAIT CAN WE TALK ABOUT LIN MO AND WANG YI’S HAPPY DANCE

oh gosh the8 is really showing us how hard seventeen works to get their choreo super in sync wow they really must work so hard.... wow minghao giving up the center position bc he knows how important this is to these kids... he deserves more recognition as a great mentor wow

oh my goodness.......... li zhenning’s voice shaking as he says to shi mingze “if you can get into top 20, then you’ll have hope” is.... the most heartbreaking......... knowing that shi mingze doesnt.......... they literally were smiling as they went off into this corner to talk and are crying by the time they come out..... can you just imagine how much sadness and stress is constantly looming over these kids’ heads and tearing down at their mental health?? its all hidden and suppressed, but with really fragile borders, so as soon as you pick at the walls, their raw emotions come bursting through... 

this just reminds me that even tho shi mingze is their cool, handsome leader, hes still the youngest in bg project............

can we please talk about how considerate of a friend li zhenning is and has been?? 

and this all took place before zhenning ever ranked into top 9.... so to them, this opportunity wouldve been really important for zhenning too, bc maybe he wouldve really needed it to get into top 9. but at least we know now.... he has enough popularity that they made the correct choice and hopefully more people will notice shi mingze as a result

ZHAN YU’S ARMSSSSSSSSS bo yuan’s hair!! i really like it!!!! wen yechen in pink!!!!!! his voice is so addicting i just wanna hear more of it... it dont matter that zhenning isnt center, he still shines :)) wait wu zelin’s voice i really liked it in retreat and we get even more vocal-like wu zelin here! thats a realy nice purple on qunfeng, hes really rocking this look SHI MINGZE I SAW THAT WINK frick minghao’s dancing is just so satisfying to watch wowow

man he looks so good

wow i live for random zhan yu reactions (imma just collect them here LOL)

after journey and mc jin’s friendship is so cute hahahaha

ok i see why elle thinks chen tao is a visual

wang zhe and wu chengze have both really improved in their stage presence throughout the course of this show aw deng chaoyuan looks the happiest we’ve ever seen him on stage haha zhou shiyuan’s voice is really so cool 

i guess we’ll never find out why gu landi is in mc jin’s group..... is it bc yao chi is here? im sorry i love this song and i love a lot of the kids in this group but can you just imagine how much better this stage would’ve been if it were with more kids who had experience rapping....? last year’s “zero” stage just made such a bigger impression on me...... this is actually really such a contrast im---

ALKSJDLAKSJDLK CHEN SIJIAN’S RAPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE JUST DID THATT!!!!!!!!!! DID YOU SEE THAT!??!?!1//!ASDLKJALSKJJ OMGGOHS AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!! CHEN SIJIAN JUST BLEW EVERYOEN OUT OF THE WATER YOU BEST BET HE DID WOWOW HE JSUT I CANT BELEIEVE HE JSUT INCLUDED AT LEAST 4 NAMES WOW 

IM WEN YECHEN

chen sijian is really the best at writing raps about his bros wow and like also he has the most creative lyrics i really appreciate wow such talent hes amazing!!!

a lost baby..

UNDERAPPRECIATED GU LANDI VISUALS

the face of a legend 

ever since i saw the “time” ballad version, ive had a sneaking suspicion that lin yuzhi is secretly one of the strongest vocalists on this show..... this is the face of talent

idk whose outfit is distracting me more, xu bingchao or xixi’s LOL shao haofan looks so nice here wow and ding feijun is so adorable even tho this is a more mature concept but i still cant see him as anything but a cute child

maybe its the way they cut up the lines but idk this song didnt really show off their vocal abilities that well..... sorry xixi :( i think xixi’s voice deserved better time to shine on this show...... his and feng junjie’s voices are actually both so nice i was so impressed when i saw them singing in the oaca clips

this koala ad makes me very uncomfortable......

wenhan reaches into the box and pulls out..... costco brand blueberries??!?!?/1 hHhahahhahHAHAHHA 

lol yao chi being so sentimental... oh look at this photo of me with bubbles on my face (me: oh no here it come--) OH YEA ALSO CHECK OUT THIS FACE WASH!

wow kou cong!! a face i havent seen in a while aw! i cant believe they filmed all the yaa eps while they all still had colorful hair lol i guess ill never get to see lin mo on yaa /sigh/ or actually any of the tyger members cept jia yi.........

HAHAHAHAHHA YESSSSSSSSS THEY INCLUDED A CLIP OF CHEN SIJIAN’S PHONE CALL !!!! HIS WAS HILARIOUSS!!!! HAHAHAHA I LOVED HOW SIMILAR HIS FAN SEEMED TO BE TO HIM HAHAH 

AAHH AS SOON AS IT GETS TO LIN MO’S ITS THE SAD MUSIC TIME

his was the most heartwarming call.... no bias LOL

feng junjie singing “the great artist” just---

this boy will never stop with the meme faces hHAHAHA

im surprised this section was so short lol i was expecting them to spend more time on this group...

SUN ZELIN SUN ZELIN SUN ZELIN YEA

jolin’s eyes are so wow 

feng junjie with the voice!!!!!!1 

JOLIN THE QUEEN

still kinda wish jia yi had more opportunity to sing on this show......... hes like second main vocalist to zhan yu in tyger but i feel like he hasnt gotten to show his voice much :( he did really well tho!!! he really has impressive stage presence

omg lin mo’s super shy “1 day” ahhhhh 

omg wang jiayi looks like hes about to cry... the poor child....

yixing reaching out to apologize to them.... hes really so caring towards them...... wang jiayi just needs more confidence!! i believe in him too

where did lin mo get this white cap from? lol he chose the pink one..... on a related note, im so happy lin mo got to be in yixing’s group, bc from the beginning with namanana hes really really tried so hard to earn yixing’s recognition, im sure it means a lot to him to be able to learn from him like this and share a stage with him 

yao mingming too, i feel like he really values yixing’s recognition as well

i think all the kids in this group had to have known that picking yixing’s group would be the most tiring and require the most effort, but i think choosing this group regardless just really shows they came here to learn 

A HAPPY BABYYY

omg like yixing is really /teaching/ them and i appreciate that

lin mo and xu fangzhou’s voices!!!!!!

OOF IM SO READY FOR THIS OUTFIT 

ASLDKALSDKJLAK HE WINKED!!!!!!!!!!!

what is this awkward closeup

why does fangzhou have wings lol

i feel like theres a lot of random awkward closeups of lin mo.... should i be happy about this??? LOL i dont think theyre all very flattering but at the same time at least hes got closeups....???? ? ??  

OOF HES GETTING MORE LINES THAN I EXPECTED TOO

you know how ive talked about how i love how much detail lin mo puts into his dancing, including even his slight head tilts? LOOK ANOTHER HEAD TILT 

HAHAHAHHAHA GUAN YUE’S EYES GOT SO BIG HAHAHHAHA OMGGG

ooof lin mo getting to sing the chorus with yixing im !!!!!! im sure hes so grateful for this opportunity wow also i think i mentioned this with namanana but i really think lin mo suits yixing’s dance style, like its a style that hes pulls off really well, so i think he got to shine a bit in this performance :’)

ok i havent said this yet but what is with that thick black fade at the top of the screen its so annoying??? like why you gotta cover the top of their heads??? 

wow we’re really getting a lot of random lin mo shots hahahha is this iqiyi repenting their wrongs from ‘spirit of the knight’ i almost am surprised how yao mingming isnt getting the most screentime but then i remember iqiyi has never favored yao mingming........ /sigh

AYYY WENXUAN AND LIN MO THE BUDDIES

just look at how perfectly tilted / well-positioned lin mo’s head is wow and that gaze wow i just love his stage presence

yea im gonna have to rewatch this perf to gif the lin mo moments.... maybe after the finale tomorrow when ill be like oop lin mo didnt make it in oh well let me just wallow in his talent that the audience slept on by drowning myself in lin mo content (its not like i do that every day already)

LOL THAT CAMERA SPIN WAS SUCH A FAIL YOU CANT SEE ANYONE CEPT WENXUAN ADJUSTING HIS MIC HAHAHHAHA ok on a side note tho im glad wenxuan got to be in this group too!! yuehua’s dancer getting to show us his dancing again :’) and we all know he was discouraged being reshuffled into “maze” and i just wanna say wenxuan deserves more credit for being able to really go out of his comfort zone and pull off the cute concept in “maze” well even tho he didnt want to accept it at first! 

HES PERFECT 

hey yall is it just me or did you see lin mo’s eyes in that really fast flashy bit at the end of the preview for the finale? HAHHAHAHA i couldnt even screenshot it bc it was so fast, but i swear i saw his eyes so i think he was in it LOOOL

JSUT KIDDING I WENT BACK AND TRIED AGAIN AND I GOT IT

I KNEW I SAW HIS EYES HAHAHAHHAHA

oo i havent mentioned this before but i really like the sound of chen sijians voice, even when speaking... 

OMG GU LANDI

OMGGGG MY CHILD YE ZIMING IN FREAKING TARZAN NEXT DOOR??!???

THIS IS TOO MUCH!!!!!!! THANKS FOR REMINDING US HOW IQIYI TOTALLY SLIGHTED THIS BOY OUT OF GETTING INTO TOP 35

aw honestly i wonder if lian huaiwei will really not make it tomorrow.....  

omg sun zelin in the ending credits!!!!

OMG ZHAN YU TOOOOOOO

OOF LOOK AT ZHAN YU’S JAWLINE (ooops sorry yechen ahhahhhaa)

they must really like this part of the choreo?? 

BUT I LOVE THIS LOOK ON YECHEN YESSS

lol is this lin mo’s back

tbh im surprised they didnt include lin mo in the ending credits but i think they were trying to make up for the loss of yao mingming time earlier LOOL 

ok well i have about 10 hrs until i gotta wake up to watch the finale so.... now to go watch fjj and hcx’s goodnight dachang HAHAH

[terramythos]

My reread commentary on October Daye #8, "The Winter Long" or "more shit goes down in this book than the first 7 combined, holy shit".

I apologize to anyone who reads these cause I literally hit the length limit on this post and had to pare it down lmao 

-Good start: Under the Acknowledgements section: "Everything I have done with October's world to this point has been for the sake of getting here". Sooo basically the first 7 books? Setup for this one. We're in for a Ride.

I want to emphasize some of the best meta foreshadowing I've seen:

FOR REFERENCE, Rosemary and Rue is the title of book 1. It's also the only book whose opening Shakespeare quote (from Hamlet) doesn't really match the title. If you know your Shakespeare, you probably would have caught that and figured out that it was from The Winter's Tale instead. Plenty of conclusions you can draw just from that. Since then the series has been chock full of hidden identities, and this book has two BIG ones coming into play. Foreshadowing was here from the very fucking beginning, and it is some next level shit. Very well done.

-If you skipped book 1 you are SO fucked, btw.

- we're going to great lengths to describe Sylvester's physical appearance. Gee I wonder why. I'm sure it's not relevant

- yes Sylvester has FOX COLORED HAIR and YELLOW EYES and his magic smells like DAFFODILS and DOGWOOD FLOWERS. He is Toby's LEIGE and FATHER FIGURE.

Me on a first read: oh it's just beginning book exposition, they all do this

Me on a second read: god fucking damn it

- toby: I should have known Sylvester would never disappoint me.

Me: oh sweetie. Oh honey.

- "He smelled like smoke and rotten oranges.

This man wasn't Sylvester Torquill."

Anyone who read book 1: OHSHIT.AVI

Welcome back, Simon! You know, Sylvester's evil twin? You know, the big bad (so far) of the series? The the one responsible for turning Toby into a fish for 14 years?

-Yet he seems kinda... off, huh? Comments about how he didnt know the spell would last 14 years, how he hates to upset October's mom, of all people? Whatever could he mean? :)))

-New toby power: spell reflection? Hell yeah? Also spell BREAKING, but to be fair she did do that one other time. In, you guessed it, book 1.

- "When I tried to picture Sylvester's face, I kept seeing Simon's instead" ow oof

- Simon calling Amandine "Amy", which we've established is an affectionate nickname (it being what, you know, THE LUIDAEG calls her). Why would Simon, of all people, call her that?

... oh.

-That sure explains a LOT, huh? That sure was set up... this whole time, huh?

-Little "fuck you" lines like "I didn't know Sylvester had a niece" in book 2. Talking about January. Well, uh, he has several actually! You're one of them!

-Explanation for why Sylvester had any inclination to be October's mentor... eventually becoming her liege and father figure... even giving her the Changeling's Choice (something family is supposed to do). It seems mighty convenient that a random noble was involved in the life of a changeling to such an extent. BUT, if he was her uncle, and knew his brother wouldn't step up? Well...

-This isn't even the biggest reveal of the book. Like, we're only a handful of chapters in and this bomb gets dropped.

-Sylvester, every 10 minutes: oh boy I cant wait to see my brother so I can like, completely eviscerate him!

Everyone else: uh,

- Tybalt: and here I thought I was going to have to ask Sylvester for his blessing. Now I technically have to ask SIMON?

Toby: uwotm8

Tybalt: oh god uhh I'm joking yeah uhh I'm just trying to distract you from all this stress :)) yeah (nailed it!)!

-And now we begin the "wow Sylvester is actually not a great person" slide. It's been hinted at that he's pretty unstable and has shitty priorities regarding people he cares about. But Toby glossed over a lot of it because she adored him. Welp.

- It's also an interesting aside that Etienne was kind of a dick to Toby for a reason in the earlier books. He legit thought she had been knighted because she was family, not that she had earned the post. And after the last few books he clearly knows now that that's not the case and they've actually become friends. That's interesting hidden character development.

- ok so The Gang finds out that Simon was telling the truth when he said turning Toby into a fish for 14 years was to save her. Because he had actually been hired to KILL her and didn't want to do it. So it was a loophole-- everyone thought she was dead, and then (as established in book 1) pretty much everyone forgot she existed until the spell broke.

-BUT Simon is bound by a geas (where have we seen that before) and cannot divulge his employer's name. But who had such a grudge against Toby and/or her mom to order a hit on her AND forcibly bind everyone to secrecy?

-who knows? Not toby. So they go to The Luidaeg to maybe get a lead, and she establishes right away that she is ALSO bound under a geas and can't say who did it. So we play some 20 questions, and then...

ULTRA DISTRESSING LUIDAEG LORE :((((

-additional: another month name just came into play. August. Toby's half sister, missing for a century. WHAT IS WITH THE MONTH NAMES

- "please don't mistake villainy for evil." That's an.. interesting quote re:Simon.

- Simon's way of protecting toby from the impending threat is "well maybe you turn into a tree for a few centuries but like. You're safe, right? Why are you mad?"

- The Luidaeg: *is straight up dead*

Toby: hey tybalt remember that time in book 2 when I Resurrected the Dead

Tybalt: yeah, it was fucking terrifying and I didnt speak to you for 6 months

Toby: *finger guns* guess whaaaaaat

-The Luidaeg: *says just. A bunch of Lore*

Toby: Luidaeg dont you dare drop that cryptic shit on me then pass out

Luidaeg: nap time

-"If you so much as whisper the first word of a transformation spell, I'll have your larynx in my hand before the second word can form." DAMN, Tybalt.

-Simon: I am VERY sorry for my bullshit earlier. I can't tell you who my employer is, but I CAN give you this BOUQUET of ICE COLD ROSES. Ice cold, like winter. Winter Roses, if you will. Yeah. Uh have a nice life, bye!

Everyone: well this sure is a mystery

-Simon is definitely a morally grey character. Has done really awful shit, is built up as a major villain... but turns out he had relatively little control over his actions. He does the wrong thing a lot but it's usually not for a truly evil end? If the context is to be believed he got stuck in the geas contract with Unnamed Employer to save his daughter, which explains the bad shit he did that we know of. Which then inadvertently kicked off like the whole series. He seems to genuinely care about Toby in a warped way? It would be so easy to write him off as an evil stepdad or whatever and there's plenty of canon to support that stance (she's an illegitimate CHANGELING child) but he seems like he wants to just be her dad. I hope we explore his character more, is what I'm saying.

-And not to keep rambling about it but Toby is an established unreliable narrator and a horrible (initial) judge of character. So it's not like this is an asspull or off base at all.

Twist of the fucking century here.

-You know... the character who set off the events of the series? The character who was murdered in book 1 and bound October to a geas forcing her to find the culprit or die? Evening fucking Winterrose?

-There were hints, most very subtle unlike the other big twists, but probably the biggest one is SHE NEVER SHOWS UP AS A NIGHT HAUNT. And they're in the story quite a bit, and they ALWAYS feature killed off characters. Except Evening.

-My favorite hints were the ones just piled in book 1. Comments like "no one knows who Evening really is" said with zero self awareness. Because we are actually about to find out who she is... 7 goddamn books later.

-dead meme but "surprise, bitch. Bet you thought you saw the last of me."

-God she's so awful lol

-Toby thinking Quentin died then calling him THE SON SHE NEVER HAD is a BIG OOF right to the HEART. ;-;

-The book also points out that The Luidaeg through the series has ALWAYS referred to Evening in present tense. Even though she "died" in book 1.

-The Luidaeg ALSO never refers to her as Evening. It's always "The Winterrose". You know, a title. Which we have heavily emphasized is something the Firstborn use in place of their true names.

*jazz hands* Surprise!

-We also (finally) have a canon explanation for the... rather remarkable coincidence that Quentin, the fucking Crown Prince (from TORONTO), is in San Francisco at all. It was always weird he got sent to Shadowed Hills, and it's been commented on multiple times... Evening arranged it, of course! For reasons we don't quite know. But as the Daoine Sidhe Firstborn, her descendants couldn't exactly say no. Even though they didn't know who she really was.

-We really are falling all over Firstborn in this series? It sure is.. an odd coincidence, huh?

We got:

The Luidaeg: Roane/Selkie

Amandine: Dochas Sidhe

Acacia: Blodynbryd

Evening: Daoine Sidhe

Blind Michael: ... uh actually I don't think we ever learn what race he's Firstborn of. All his "children" are kidnapping victims forcibly twisted into monsters. Well, except for Luna, but we only know the Blodynbryd side.

But it's weird that for being so rare that we've run into 5 of them in 8 books. There's gotta be a reason for it.. but what?

-Luna starts the series as Toby's Surrogate Mom and is now just straight up an enemy huh

-I made this observation in my book 1 notes, but I find it very interesting that all of Toby's initial friends and allies... aren't by this point. Whereas her current allies are either former enemies or people she initially disliked or distrusted.

Starter allies: Sylvester? Was lying to her the whole time. Luna? Pretty much tried to sacrifice her (+above). Evening? Uhh this whole damn book. Devin? Tried to kill her for personal gain. Lily/Connor? Both killed off for real.

Current allies: Tybalt? Literal former enemy turned lover. Quentin? Kind of a snotty, vaguely racist kid she whips into shape. The Luidaeg? Extremely powerful witch who Toby assumes is True Neutral and wouldn't hesitate to kill her. May? Literal personal walking death omen.

It's just a cool reversal. There's so much really excellent character development in this series and I love it.

-Simon still is a pretty major bastard but.. less outright mustache twirling evil than we were led to believe up to this book. You learn his Backstory and while it really doesn't justify his actions it does...explain them.

-Blink and you miss it Lore: August is missing because she entered a contract with the Luidaeg. She's holding the candle from book 3 :)))

I'm starting to realize I stan The Luidaeg so hard I just have to take a picture every time she shows up and does stuff lmfao. (Best character).

-But... nothing like your inconceivably ancient and powerful aunt suddenly owing you a life debt, I guess???

-Toby. You know, just an ordinary weak changeling who has somehow managed to KILL A FIRSTBORN and RAISE THE DEAD. yikes.

I'm just putting this here cause it's funny as shit. Tybalt really is just... a cat

This book: I heard you like distressing Luidaeg lore??

Me: oh thanks I don't need to feel things

-God Evening is awful. Like, if you didn't know that already, see above.

-It says something about The Luidaeg that despite all that shit their Firstborn did to her she ends up becoming such good friends with Quentin, a Daoine Sidhe?

-BIG LORE with The Luidaeg talking to Maeve??? And Maeve "responding" kind of? This series damn well better explore what the fuck happened to those three it's been built up all series

-Omg the showdown with Evening and The Luidaeg. And Toby managing to break free and realize she deserves so much more than Evening-- all without magic. And Simon showing up for a last minute redemption trying to hit Evening with elf shot? I mean he gets shot in the process, but...

-We now have like, 3 or 4 characters just... asleep indefinitely thanks to elf shot. that's gonna be a Thing isnt it. Rayseline, Evening, Simon, Arden's brother...

WE DID IT BOYS

-This is the last full one I've already read. Most of my reactions in 9-12 are gonna be new. So.

[fymoanstax]

Monsta X as Professors

This was not requested but Admin Ponyo just,,,,,,thought of it. Hope you guys enjoy!

Shownu

Teaches Political Science

‘You can call me Hyunwoo or Mr. H I don’t really care just don’t call me sir because it makes me feel old’

Monotone voice makes you want to fall asleep during lecture

Gives direct answers to exams

If the question is like ‘when was the declaration of independence signed?’

On the study guide/exam review it’ll say ‘make sure you know the day the declaration was signed’

Easy A class

Doesn’t take attendance bc there are like 200 people in class

Every day is casual friday

Dresses more like a student

Arrives to class late sometimes

No homework

He’s the professor where you’re kind of like ‘should I be having these thoughts about him?’

Sometimes he'll just put on Law and Order™ because its it's too much of a hassle to actually teach that day

On the first day of class he asked in the middle if the students wanted to take a break for 20 minutes or just keep going and get out of class early.

Gives out candy on review days

Despite seeming like he doesn't care he wants his students to be socially aware and active in politics

Really raising the next generation of leaders 11/10 would take this class

Wonho

Teaches education courses

But he also Handles 1st year seminars

Makes people call him coach for no reason

Very inspirational

Female students swoon over him

Wears dress pants and dress shirts and dress shoes

BUT NO BLAZER OR JACKET OR ANYTHING

Rolls up his sleeves a lil

You know those biceps are LI VINg

‘I can be your mentor’ (du du du du du du du du, get it. Like,,,,,’i can be your hero’ okay nvm)

Always comes into class right on the dot

Lectures include a lot of uplifting quotes

Has powerpoints with cute animations, transitions and lots of videos

Stays behind after class and is surrounded by students wanting to talk to him

Has a good rating on ratemyprofessor plus a whole chili pepper bc lots of people take his class

No phones in class because he wants everyone to pay attention but newsflash they already are

No electronics in general

Says attendance doesn't count but passes around a sign in sheet bc he wants to make sure people that show up are rewarded

Minhyuk

Teaches nutrition courses

Wears tracksuits to class

Talks about staying healthy and eating well but shows up late to class with burger king

Has never been to a gym unless pokemon go counts

When people go to his office hours they find him playing overwatch

Gives a lot of extra credit

Makes twitter deals with his students

‘If this post gets 100k retweets our professor will give us all As’

Assigns homework randomly

Next class he has forgotten he assigned homework at all

Until a student brings it up

‘Did I assign that? Okay yeah hand it in then.’

Gives everyone As for the sake of not grading

Actually forgets to grade entire exams

Tells students when pop quizzes will happen

‘Well we’re gonna have a pop quiz this week and if its not today then it must be,,,,the only other time we meet this week.’ *wink*

Asks students to call him the Italian Stallion despite not being Italian or a stallion.

Asks everyone how their weekend was and really does want some stories.

*finished a chapter like 15 minutes early* “You guys want to stop here?”

Group work all the time

He likes it because even he learns from it

Kihyun

Math professor

High level math like calc 2 or smth

Wears suits to class

Doesn’t give study guides or do review days

Homework every week

Only 6 questions

1a, 1b, 1c, 1d, 1e, 1f, 1g, 1h, 1i, 1j, 1k, 1l…….you know

Has never cancelled a class

Gives you dirty look if you walk out of class early

‘We still have 45 seconds of class don’t pack up’

Syllabus is 15 pages long

No calculators allowed

‘You learned this in math 126 so i won’t go over it’ UH YEAH 3 SEMESTERS AND AN ENTIRE SUMMER AGO BOI

Asks for homework at the beginning of class

Before you even walk in

If it’s not in your hand no points for the day

Takes attendance daily + counts as 20% of grade

Only allowed 1 excused absence with note

Always bashes the rival university by using said university as the bad examples in word problems.

“Professor what does this have to do with math"

“Nothing I just hate (insert university here)”

At the end of the semester he said “I should have called you guys worms and then at the end said ‘congratulations you are all now maggots’"

Tough professor but everyone loves him still

Hyungwon

Teaches classes on law

ALWAYS has his hair styled and his suit looking pristine

Fashionably late is reAL for this man

Student: ‘I heard if the professor doesn’t show up for 15 minutes we can le-...’

Hyungwon: ‘You can leave whenever. Nobody’s stopping you’

*INSERT SASSY WALK AWAY*

Takes like 10 minutes to get settled before starting lecture

Carries a briefcase to class to look professional but its empty

Students fear him

His beauty AND his brains

Tells class that there will be pop quizzes

Never has a pop quiz in the entire semester

Mock trials every week

Will destroy his students during mock trials but its for their own good

‘There’s too much traffic so I’m cancelling class’

Helps students practice their law poker face by making memey faces at them

It’s part of the final

Laugh or smile is minus 10 points

During an exam he stopped everyone so he could show them a meme.

Jooheon

Teaches music appreciation

Students call him sir

He thinks its funny

One page syllabus and all you do is sign and return it

Asks his students for new music suggestions

Goes off on tangents about his life

‘Yeah, last week I adopted a new dog and his name is Bark Obama’

Will show you videos of his dog on FACEBOOK

When he goes off on tangents he stops mid story and says “why am I telling you this? I dont know”

Dances in front of the class

Will dance to anything

Gregorian chants

Clair de lune

Anything by Chopin

Always wears a hat to class bc he changes his hair color often but that’s seen as unprofessional

Is always down to sit and talk about some good songe

‘Appreciate the music’

‘Feel the music’

‘BE THE MUSIC’

Once his students walked in and he was playing All Star by Smash Mouth and he claimed it was “because if he didnt hear it now it would be stuck in his head forever"

Changkyun

Biology professor

Syllabus is riddled with biology puns

*walks into class* ‘The name’s bond. Hydrogen bond. Just kidding I’m your professor Im Changkyun’

Doesn’t know how to spell,,,,,,,,,,,,,proffesor,,,,,,,proffessor,,,,,,professor,,,,,,,,,

Sits on his desk at the front of the class while lecturing

Relates to his students

The professor you will accidentally run into on the street

Or at coachella who knows

Guaranteed to break at least one microscope or test tube during the semester

Shows the class he can rap the beginning of nicki minaj’s super bass perfectly

Won’t stop talking about his friends dog Bark Obama

Gossips about other professors

A genuinely great teacher

Cares about his students

Wants them to succeed

Wants them to thank him in their speeches when they win awards for ground breaking discoveries

‘All you have to say is I owe all I know to my old professor Im Changkyun. It’s not that hard Kenny.’

Everything went wrong at a lab once when he was a TA and he got so done he just cancelled the lab. He had no fear of getting in trouble

Has puns on his slides that nobody understands.

‘Biology is the best science. Physics and Chemistry can choke but go off I guess.’

Sometimes doesnt wear shoes in class

[creion]

gen z/millennial fma headcanons courtesy of me.

greed:

greed is friends with everyone in this au. everyone. he knows everyone.

no one knows greeds real name. he’s just greed. in this au thomas halbert doesnt have the url greed. greed does. hes not even that greedy and he most definitely blocks everyone who calls him out on it.

he’s mysterious in general. his youtube channel goes between him doing backflips off of things he shouldnt be doing back flips off of to a podcast about [some obscure political thing]? who is he?

greeds probably low key homeless like idk in an au where hes human i can imagine him showing up at one of his friends houses every night with like his one backpack of belongings like “hey im sleeping on ur couch and using ur shower” and no one really questions him because hes charming enough to get away with it yknow

except edward questions him. “ling isnt even here. wyd.” “please. if i dont shower i might die.” “fucking fine I GUESS”

greeds favorite place to go is ed and lings apartment because theyre nice and ling always feeds him and also eds funny and greed appreciates humor

this is just a general greed headcanon but god is he poly :3c i can and will fight about this.

ling:

GAY! TANA! MONGEAU! hes wild and a lot of people hate him even though hes really a giant sweetie. he’s best friends with greed and sometimes ling goes on greeds podcast so they can talk about their exercise regimen

hes dating edward of course. theres not more to this other than theyre dating and they love each other and Would kill for each other. also a lot of people probably dont think they have a deep relationship but im telling you. theyre star crossed lovers. its total romcom bullshit.

ling probably gets paid to go to parties. like thats his job and he makes good money doing it even though he has a masters in psychology. he just. goes to parties. pays off his student loans.

he does a lot of prank videos on youtube. think tgfbro but american and less edgy.

ling probably also models on occasion. like hes pretty enough that he just does it.

he shaves his head at some point or like maybe gets an undercut and no one can look at him for a month because its just weird. lings hair is like his identity.

he gets up to a lot of hijinks with greed. theyre probably a little gay together. edward doesnt care because its 2018 time 2 start normalizing polyamory ok.

ling spends actual money on new clothes for greed but the man always wears the same two outfits and although ling rarely gets angry this gets him a little riled

edward:

his youtube channel is just a mess kind of like greeds except with him its unintentional he just... does what he wants. theres videos of him showing off his physical prowess. like hes small but he WILL kick your fuckin ass. hes probably a black belt and is the physical embodiment of the navy seals rant.

sometimes he does vsauce style videos on youtube and everyone hates when he does it because hes memelord 69 but at the same time hes wicked smart

hes a physicist in this world and im serious it throws anyone who meets him for a loop.

ed gets asked a lot how roy is his dad if hes only 12 years older than him. eds answers are either “he found me and my brother as infants and has mothered us since” or “idk man”

ed accidentally starts a meme. he posts a bunch of pictures of ling either sleeping or passed out and idk the specifics of the meme but he starts a meme and it pains him. he consumes he does not create.

ed likes greed but he doesnt express it. “i dont like you” “[eyeroll] and???? im still eating ur leftovers”

ed actually does kick russel tringham in the head for a skit for one of lings vlogs. ed and russel are best friends even if russel genuinely did try to steal eds identity at some point and may or may not have put ed in debt for a few months

roy: 

hes one of ed’s professors much to eds dismay since roy is, technically, his adoptive father.

he probably argues with ed a lot in the middle of lectures (”hey dumbass thats not how it works” “im literally teaching you what you’re majoring in.” “yeah and im telling you that you’re wrong.”)

he’s like 35 in this au and technically a millennial. ed’s 21.

roy has an instagram and its literally just pictures of hughes and elicia and nina and ed and al

roy and hughes are most definitely a foster family and am i pulling this from my own fic yes i am can you stop me no you cant

hughes:

HES FINE. HES ALIVE.

all of the gen z kids in this au think hes awful bc of all the dad jokes and slightly outdated humor. hes not awful. hes perfect. hes doing his best.

he loves all four of his children.

he and gracia are best friends even if their marriage didnt work out for unknown reasons. they along with roy are GOOD PARENTS to elicia. you can pry this from my cold dead hands. canon can suck my chode.

lust:

shes not like greed she doesnt try to be mysterious. shes probably a beauty guru (SolarisCosmetics) and does a lot of tutorials like “Low Commitment Goth Makeup Tutorial”

shes unintentionally mysterious because for her first like 50 videos or so theres no commentary its just subtitles

her first video with commentary is like “i... apologize. i was not intending to be so... mysterious.” and shes actually very sweet and nice and you can fight me on this ok

greed is her adoptive brother and greed makes her bleep out his name and blur her mouth whenever she calls him by his name bc he likes to lurk in the background of her videos because hes an asshole

winry:

shes a mechanic in this au and i mean shes a mechanic in canon but she prob specializes in like. idk. cars. this is a headcanon list im not looking up specifics of mechanics point is she can rebuild an engine in an afternoon and everyone in this au is in love with her

BIG LESBIAN

she probably tries getting ed to go on double dates (him and ling with her and lan fan) but every single time he shoots her down and its to the point shes almost convinced that hes not even dating ling in the first place

greed is probably her biggest client. no one knows how he does it but his car is constantly breaking and winry is the only mechanic in his general vicinity who knows how to do her job worth a shit and also her repair shop has cool music and he probably finds excuses just to chill for the music

“[greed] please. if your fat ass is going to be taking up counter space AT LEAST help clean up” “excuse you my ass is FIRM AND PERKY.”

its probably a joke among ed’s following that winry DOES NOT put up with his shit and when winry gets asked out it shes just like “hes an asshole why the fuck do you think im gonna let him walk around all half cocked like that”

riza:

i like to think shes in the military in this au too. not like military military but maybe air force idk. imagine pilot riza. wow.

shes not on active duty or w/e but you KNOW shes in a foreign country going to college paid for by the government.

everyone in this au is at least bi and riza is no exception. she is dating olivier armstrong. they are in love u can pry this from my cold dead hands you fucking gremlins

edward is probably platonically in love with her. like when he gets to see her (which isnt often) he has to occasionally stop, put a hand on her shoulder, do the ‘boi’ hand (idk how else to describe it) and say, “i love you dont ever change” “thank you, edward.” “[hug]”

envy: 

a troll. like you know those troll blogs that are pretending to be otherkin or some really obscure gender w neopronouns (u do u but we all kno theres trolls). envy has one of those blogs.

envy is actually nonbinary irl but theyre very critical of “special snowflakes” (again u do u these headcanons dont necessarily reflect my opinions and as long as u aint hurting no one i support u) and they probably cyberbully ppl

envy is garbage in this fic

“god i hate you” “actually eat my ass, greed”

see greed is the opposite of ed w riza. he looks at envy and occasionally has to say “i fucking hate you”

theyre secrety buds but like... they annoy the shit out of each other. u kno they do.

ENVY STARTS A LOT OF DISCOURSE. THEY PROBABLY START A LOT OF HOMESTUCK DISCOURSE. GOD. here i am in 2018 writing about envy starting fucking homestuck discourse. its probably like davekat discourse too tbh

i know im forgetting alphonse, may/mei (i spell it mei), and lan fan but its like 4:19 am 

please send me asks if u have any feedback. or reply to this post. its up to u. i trust u to make the right decision. (there is no reight decision and honestly i need to go to bed)

[tumblunni]

Wait so is their name Uz or what...? I know before we (FINALLY) got an english dub of this game like a decade late and it became my FAVOURITE THING EVER, everyone used to say Yuzu for some reason. But then in the game it seemed to always say Uzu, but then the steam trading card emoticon says Uz..? And like.. there was pretty much no info on this installment of the series before the dub came out, and there’s STILL only a tiny fandom and even (annoyingly) some of the walkthroughs are wrong for certain endings. So i can’t even find out what the kanji were for Uzu originally, to have any idea on pronounciation... Man SO MANY names in this game are different between different menus, its really confusing! But I thought at least the main sidekick character was somewhat consistant!

anyway i need to know this because Uzu (redhead one on the left) needs to go on my Make A Fusion of All Of Your Favourite Characters meme even tho they have like the smallest fuckin role ever in a really badly translated game but just AAAAAA great design and sweet and cute personality and interesting dynamic of the protagonist kid being a former fairy who wished to be human, and Uzu being like her secret imaginary friend who looks after her~! its nice cos the previous assistant characters were all just serious and competant butlers, but Uzu is more like a second kid character that’s just not capable of growing up. It can get a bit sad sometimes but EXTREMELY sweet how Uzu is all ‘I don’t actually understand this humanity lesson I’m explaining, and I’ll never be capable of it, but i’m so proud of you for everything you’re doing’. Srsly its like ‘don’t go where I can’t follow’ but ‘please do, i want what’s best for you, and all us fairy siblings you barely remember are all cheering you on to achieve something we’ll never have, even if it means you’ll forget us’. Like srsly Uzu is such a sweet goofy dork who’s all ‘fairies have no imagination lol, I don’t get art’ and ‘fairies never have any bigger dream than just what they want to eat tomorrow. I want stew.’ ‘OH U~’ But like also its clear that they’re not incapable of emotion AT ALL, they absolutely fuckin adore their strange little sister that’s now a big sister and some day will be that thing called an adult and the two of them will drift apart forevermore..

And like just SERIOUSLY what little we see of Uzu is just that they care SO MUCH! Even as they struggle understanding the appeal of humanity and why protag wants to be one of those things, Uzu is still like MAXIMUM SUPPORT TIME. Just gets comedy moments from trying to support a thing they don’t know very much about, lol! Srsly its interesting and nice how much you get to know about the two of them via such few scenes, how Uzu starts off being all ‘oooh, yay, you spotted That Thing I Heard Humans Do, let me explain...’ and then it becomes completely apparant that the lazy lil sprite doesnt actually have anything beyond those two scenes of surface knowledge XD So end up teaching your big lil sibling all about the wonders of humanity! And even if Uzu is very much your opposite and very much happy-go-lucky and super confident in their identity as a fairy, they’re just so.. so... “I DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS IMPORTANT BUT THIS IS IMPORTANT TO YOU, AAAAA” *aggressive cheerleading* seriously the only time Uzu gets sad is in the endings where protagonist gives up and returns to being a fairy, even though being a fairy is Uzu’s favourite thing in the world. Its so heartwrenching to see this little pink sweetheart being all like ‘was it my fault that it all went wrong? because I didnt take it seriously enough? she was so excited about it...’ And then those bad endings also say that protagonist will eventually forget this short time as a human girl, but she can’t return to being a happy peaceful fairy like Uzu. She’ll just remember that she regrests something, even if her immortal lifespan means she’ll lose track of what it was. And OH MAN I really wonder about what her and Uzu were like before the start of the game, then?? Cos she was said to be a not very happy fairy, she was just the only one who couldnt enjoy dancing around the flowers and wished of a human’s happy ending. I wonder if Uzu was already her friend then, and followed her to the human world to look after her, even though she’s forgotten them? i mean all we know about it is that their sibling dynamic is ‘technically true, all fairies are siblings since we were made by the fairy queen’. But like, whether Uzu already knew them or was just hired for this job by the queen or maybe even just snuck along like a lil trickster cos ‘huh? a fairy who wished to be human? That sounds fun!’. Whatever their backstory is, they’re a very damn good immaurture big sibling of strange, and I love this tiny family forever. Also apparantly baby fairies hatch from lucky drops of morning dew upon the flowers each spring, which is ADORABLE! i wonder if that affects their appearance? I’d assume protagonist was a lilac or a pansy, maybe Uzu was a snapdragon or a poppy? ;3

aaa sorry im rambling its just that I REALLY LOVE THIS CHARACTER CONCEPT and i mean the game already does have more dialogue with the daughter compared to other games and explains more about how the fairies work compared to your demon butler in the last game BUT LIKE I STILL WANT MORE!!!!! i love uzu and i love protagonist but protagonist’s personality is kinda blank slate and depends on your choices. but i still love her cos that starting concept of ‘sad lonely fairy who wishes to be a human princess, gets adopted by sweet disabled former knight man as a dad’ is just like THE FUCKIN BEST PLOT and aaaa I really actually cared about her and wanted her to succeed cos there was a REASON for wanting to reach the princess ending! not just arbitrarily wanting the best score, i want to give my sweet monster child her perfect fairytale dreeeeeaaaam~

but just AAA i really love Uzu and AAA god their design is so cool too, its just a nice colourscheme with the plain black and white casual robe thing and the very bright pink hair and then the tiny mischief ponytail and the surprisingly complicated rainbow sigil wing effects~ and lol ALSO i do kinda have to love a nonbinary character, yeah tho in this case its more of the ‘ambiguous headcanon’ type, cos uzu just doesn’t get any pronouns in english, and gendered pronouns dont really exist in japanese. and the game fandom is so small that there’s no sources on whether the japanese version ever mentioned a gender in supplimenary material. Also, I mean, the dub messes up a lot of really basic stuff like gender pronouns and even name spellings within the same sentence, lol! so its not really a reliable source. But whatever, it might be reckless to assume, but I’m gonna stick with this headcanon until we get proven otherwise, I guess. And srsly Uzu’s fab style is a look I wish I could pull off with my own androgeny in real life! (and yknow probably accidentally but they’re close to trans flag colours lol)

oh and from googling all i can find out is that uzu in japanese means spiral and yuzu means pomelo melon so.. huh. That Did Not Help.

also I found that tehre were a bunch of spinoff minigame compilations for the early playstation installments in the series! its really cute to see the characters from all the different ‘generations’ getting to meet each other~ In this one that seems to be the only one with any english info (Princess Maker: Go Go Princess), its like a monopoly board game except the pieces are an all-star cast of princesses and all the events are references to events from the individual games. SO COOL!!!

and look how much sprite detail they put into a silly spinoff! O_O it sucks that these spritesheets display this way though, so i have no idea how all the parts would line up and what the animations would look like but FUCK its still really cute to see cube and uzu having a good ol hug! also is it just me or do Uzu’s face sprites look a little older? I mean sure its probably just cos this was near the end of the ps1 era and the art style had gotten more detailed, but maybe I’d like to headcanon that Uzu ended up maturing from this whole experience and like.. maybe fairies age up as they emotionally mature? (cos i mean how did the fairy queen get to be the only adult one, lol!) Or perhaps Uzu could wish to be human too in the end, and become your real sibling! it’d be so confusing to explain that your new ten year old sibling is actually 500 years older than you XD also poor faceless dad character wouldn’t be lonely now his protagochild has gone off to be the best at 63 potential careers, yknow? or haha, maybe just imagine a reverse au where you raise all the butlers and the princesses are the butlers? or the princesses are the dads and the dads are the kids? OR EVERYONE IS LUCIFON man i just rrly luv princess makerrrrr

[yeoldontknow]

11 Questions Tag

tagged by @chanyeolingss @kpopfanfictrash and @yeol-stole-my-soul <3333

Rules: 1. post the rules 2. answer the questions given to you by the tagger. 3. write 11 questions of your own 4. tag 11 people

ALRIGHT so i was tagged 3 times with 11 different questions each time so im going to answer all 33 of these and then write 11 of my own LORDY. HERE WE GO

also putting this under a cut cause 33 questions will be a lot

from @chanyeolingss

If you had the chance to do something illegal and get away with it, would you? this entirely depends on what the illegal thing is? like, would i ever cause a person bodily harm? probably not. something less insane and petty? probably. like if i knew i could steal a tv and get away with it, i probably would. 

What do you do to calm down? i listen to music and sit in my room. i light candles. im big into aroma therapy and so i tend to always have lavender or vanilla scents in my space. i pet my cat and make him sit with me. purring kitties lower my anxiety like, a lot. other times i take a bath. If you wanted to, what new name would you give yourself? when i was a kid i hated my name because the spelling always seemed gross to me. for the longest time i wanted to be named Aurelia. im good now tho lmao ive shortened my name on my own to just kat and it suits me Do you use markers, pencils or crayons when coloring/drawing? pencils Of the places you’ve been, which was the worst? honestly i reallllyyy didnt like amsterdam. nothing about that trip made me happy. like im grateful i took the tour of anne frank’s house, but like it wasnt really enjoyment it was just this overwhelming feeling of emotion and trauma. it was beautiful and i wouldnt trade that experience for the world. but everything else was awful. the people i was with was a big problem so id like to go back with a better group and try again.  What’s your favorite Disney movie? always a cross between mulan and beauty and the best Which celebrity do you identify with? i feel like im emma thompson 100% of the time What is your favorite season? autumn, without question the best season What’s the worst job you’ve ever had? my first ever ever ever job was for this newspaper in the town where i grew up. our family friend worked for them and got me the job but it was only supposed to be for 5 days. i had a garbage bin filled with newspapers and i had to hand them out to people. i was only getting paid based on the amount of bins i emptied. i hated every single moment of it. 

What’s the pettiest thing you’ve ever done? im not really a petty person tbh its just that if you fall out of my good favor you will not be allowed back in. my trust once lost is lost forever Do you prefer talking on the phone or texting/messaging? please dont call me unless you need help lmao texting is fine

from @kpopfanfictrash

1) If you could have one superpower, what would it be? my god i want so many but right now its a tie between controlling an element (either fire or water) or the ability to understand every language

2) What was your favorite TV show growing up? when i was a kid there was a show called roswell that aired on what used to be The WB and is now The CW lmao it was awful but i made my mother let me stay up to watch it every monday. i still adore this show even though i KNOW its objectively awful but i own all 3 seasons and regularly watch them when im feeling sad lmao

3) What’s the next trip you’re taking or want to take? IN LESS THAN A FEW WEEKS, I WILL BE IN ST LOUIS WITH @kpopfanfictrash, @the-porcelain-doll-xo, @igot7bangtanbaes and @rudeboywonho <33333

4) What is your biggest pet peeve? when im walking behind someone and they are smoking in my face AND passive aggression please just tell me wtf is wrong so we can move on

5) Tell me one weird habit you have lmfao god i cant believe im admitting this to the world BUT when im stuck and need to think hard on something i hold my boobs pls leave me lmao

6) If your life were a movie, what genre would it be? (comedy, drama, teen horror… LOL) id be in one of those teen comedies. probably john hughes with a DOPE soundtrack

7) Who is one person you find inspirational (real or imagined)? my mother

8) What one thing would you save first from your home, in a fire? my cat lmao but if you mean non living thing my phone

9) What physical feature do you first notice on a person? ears and smile are usually within the same moment

10) What is the strangest thing you have ever eaten? i cant say ive eaten anything strange. when i was in france i had escargot and adored it

11) One thing I would not guess about you by looking at you. ive played violin since i was 7

from @yeol-stole-my-soul

1) What are you wearing rn :))) What’s your go-to outfit? my pajamas jeans, band tee, combat boots - my standard

2) If you could tell your bias one thing, what would it be? i can i tell him a lot of things in one breath? ok here goes: chanyeol, i respect the living shit out of you, but please make sure you take care of yourself like i know its easy to assume your problems are a burden and that no one really will notice your tells but the ones who care about you the most will never think of you as a burden and want to make sure you keep smiling - also please remember to eat well and sleep and hydrate, because if you dont you will get sick and the last thing i could handle on this earth is seeing you unwell or injured because you pressured yourself too much - trust me i do the same thing and that is why i am openly telling you that the people who really love you will understand if you step back so you can regroup 

*coughs, wheezes* i love you so fucking much park chanyeol please take care of you

*gasping* your verse in chill saved my life

*dies*

3) If you found yourself as a character in a story, what role would you probably play (ex. the villain, the hero/ine, the sidekick, the crazy old man…) and why? i know for a fact id be the witty side kick who unwittingly solves every problem just because shes observant and doesnt have martyr vibes

4) Do you sleep with socks on or socks off at night?? socks off what kind of demon leaves them on???? dont trust that type wtf

5) Which meme most accurately describes you?

this image is me at any given time of day

6) What do you want your last words to be? oh for fucks sake

7) Describe your ideal date(?) i’m adding the question mark to pretend this is a question somewhere we can talk - theres a place in NYC thats a bar but also an arcade filled with old old games like the original tekken and street fighter. i like going there for chill vibes and then likely walking along the water pier in central park at sunset. its really quiet in that part of the city and on a date i really just want to talk, get to know you, figure out your energy. if its the weekend id happily head to the IFC center for a midnight showing of a classic and then depart at 3AM feeling like ive actually connected with someone who challenges me intellectually and culturally 

8) If you could switch lives/bodies with one person for a day, who would it be and why? zhang yixing so i could make sure he sleeps

9) If you had to spend 24 hours in a television show, which one would you choose and why? And would you survive lolol? i want to be in parks and recreation so i can flirt with ben the entire show and make leslie angry and then by the end be best friends with leslie and anne and then become a recurring character

10) What’s your favorite quote? ‘But from each crime are born bullets that will one day seek out in you where the heart lies.’ - Pablo Neruda

11) Where THE FUCK is Waldo?? his house, wondering why the fuck people keep assuming he would be anywhere else

11 new questions:

1. if you could learn any language, which would you want to learn and why? 2. you’ve moved into your dream house. CONGRATS! what does it look like and where is it? 3. i’m buying you a drink. what are you having? 4. welcome to NYC! let me take you my favourite record shop. whats that record you have in your hand?  5. pitch me an idea for a tv show - in 6 sentences 6. i’m sorry but you’re dead. what does the afterlife look like? 7. thanks for hanging out with me tonight! lets put on a movie. what are we watching? 8. i know, i know. dating my friends is odd but i love you so why shouldnt this be a date? 9. i’ve taken you to the strand in NYC. its a 4 storey book store that is filled with miles worth of books. we are on the 4th floor, which is the floor for old and rare books. which book are you looking for? 10. i got my vacation time booked! ok. lets decide. where are we going? really! why do you want to go? 11. SHIT! i didnt know you could sing!! we’re starting a band. what are we called?

tagging: @yeolology @kpopandlock @kollectionn @kimnamwho @imdifferentshadesofpurple @oh-beyond @pikayeollie @the-porcelain-doll-xo  @daegusoftboys @baebae-goodnight @igot7bangtanbaes

[ohmymegido]

CHROME DIED ON ME WHILE I WAS TYPING THIS SO I HAD TO DO IT LIKE 2 TIMES take this you heathens [ post ]

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

my cat, bless his heart

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

two years ago i would have said shy but now i think im more In Between

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

@shanakin and @lizziebobizzy tomorrow !! also college friends :0

4. Are you easy to get along with?

i hope so

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

yyyyyye s i guess so

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

nice people who make me laugh i guess

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

i hope so, if not that means something bad happened

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

my CAT i love him

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

depends on the person, but most of the time not really

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

ffn

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“are you gonna do it“ @blueshyft

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

apparently my recent thing is Ladies with Airy Voices so here’s some of those:

Miss You by Gabrielle Aplin, Night Bus by Gabrielle Aplin, Lone Digger by Caravan Palace, Green Light by Lorde, Fine by Tayler Buono

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

you gotta be v close to me to get hair playing privileges 

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

the word miracles triggers me

15. What good thing happened this summer?

i saw my cat and i pet him a lot

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

yee

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

definitely

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

i threw out the bottle when i was done so no not really

19. Do you like bubble baths?

when i was a kid i really liked them !

20. Do you like your neighbors?

i dont know them much but they seem nice

21. What are you bad habits?

i pick my cuticles like a Motherfucker :’0 it’s really bad tbh but it was Even Worse before

22. Where would you like to travel?

japan bc im a weab

23. Do you have trust issues?

express trust to everyone but trust no one

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

laying on my bed like a bum

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

my nose maybe?

26. What do you do when you wake up?

fall back asleep and have ragrets 2 hours later

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

this is a Problematic Question (and no, my skin is fine the way it is ty)

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

my cat i love him

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

that implies i have an ex in the first place

30. Do you ever want to get married?

yeah, probably

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?

yee but it needs a trim tbh :/

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

none, i dont really want to bang any celebrities

33. Spell your name with your chin.

saragh

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

volleyball and fencing !! except not that much anymore bc college kills sports rip

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

TV

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

does platonic liking count bc if not then no not really

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

AWKWARD SILENCES ARE only awkward if you Make it awkward (if you’re the kind of person who points out an awkward silence i hate you and you need to go shut the fuck up)

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

isnt this the same thing as What are you attracted to

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

do bakeries count bc i Love Bread

40. What do you want to do after high school?

college

well Whaddya know

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

..maybe

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

im sleeping, busy, or im ignoring you

43. Do you smile at strangers?

i try :’0

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

if i definitely wont be harmed while im there: ocean

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

social obligation and fear of judgement

46. What are you paranoid about?

that people are watching me ;;;

47. Have you ever been high?

i had a Weed Brownie once and it did nothing except taste bad so. no

48. Have you ever been drunk?

yes and i intend to be so again

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

i feel like this is counterintuitive bc dont i not want people to find out in the first place ??

50. What was the color of the last hoodie you wore?

im changing all these european (aka Wrong) spellings into American ones jsyk

also black

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

not really

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

i should probably worry less

53. Favorite makeup brand?

i like Stilla eyeliner :0

54. Favorite store?

hummm maybe Muji, it’s a nice place to kill time

55. Favorite blog?

MINE jk i gotta boost BNF @anonymousalchemist her blog is (y)

56. Favorite color?

Red or Green

57. Favorite food? 

recently it’s been Eggs

58. Last thing you ate?

ok chrome has crashed on me like 5 times since i tried to answer this specific question i think it’s cursed

also this chinese egg pancake thing

59. First thing you ate this morning?

the chinese egg pancake thing mentioned before

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

maybe, idk ive lived a long life

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

nop

62. Been arrested? For what?

lol no

63. Ever been in love? 

i Guess So

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

it’s not very exciting you should read @anonymousalchemist‘s though it’s really good

65. Are you hungry right now?

yes :(( 

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

they’re mostly the Same so i guess the answer is no

67. Facebook or Twitter?

FB

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

Tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now?

lol no

70. Names of your bestfriends? 

FFN gang ;0 plus some others but no irl names for now

71. Craving something? What?

im still in wisdom teeth recovery so it would be nice to be able to eat food without getting everything Stuck in my stitches :/

72. What color are your towels?

white and beige

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

one, but there’s 3 total on my bed

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

yes ! a small stuffed cat i’ve had since 3rd grade and a little wolf

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

in total ? too many

75. Favorite animal?

cats i guess

76. What color is your underwear?

black

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

chocolate

78. Favorite ice cream flavor?

Brownie a la Mode, or anything along those lines

79. What color shirt are you wearing?

Red and black!

80. What color pants?

black shorts

81. Favorite tv show?

what’s a tv

82. Favorite movie?

Princess Bride

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

ok i finally watched mean girls for the first time this year and it was like. ok i guess. i havent watched the second so i guess Mean Girls

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

Mean Girls bc i have not watched 21JS

85. Favorite character from Mean Girls?

no one god why does everyone have such an obsession over this movie

86. Favorite character from Finding Nemo?

the ray who teaches the school

87. First person you talked to today?

my dad

88. Last person you talked to today?

my mom

89. Name a person you hate?

no one

90. Name a person you love?

MY CAT

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

no not really

92. In a fight with someone?

nope

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

like 1 for exercising maybe (i used to own like 6 when i was in middle school and wore them every day)

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

Too Many (see: my entire wardrobe)

95. Last movie you watched?

Lego Batman!

96. Favorite actress?

dont have one

97. Favorite actor?

nope

98. Do you tan a lot?

i tan easily i guess but ive never stepped foot in a tanning salon in my life

99. Have any pets?

CAT plus some fish

100. How are you feeling?

pretty alright

101. Do you type fast?

pretty fast

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

103. Can you spell well?

W - E - L - L

this is easy next question

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

yeah, a bit i guess

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

yyyes ? no. maybe. what’s the definition of a bonfire party?

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

if i have, then they didnt tell me

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yeah, a few times

108. What should you be doing?

GETTING ready to go to a family friend party but instead im here on tumbl dot com answering a 150 long ask meme

109. Is something irritating you right now?

my glasses are a little smudged

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

i think so yeah

111. Do you have trust issues?

please see #23

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

does my cat count

113. What was your childhood nickname?

I NEVER HAD ONE sarah honestly has No Nickname Abilities i never got a nickname until i was like a junior in highschool and people called me swang on the fencing team. that was nice i was so happy tbh pls call me swang

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yee

115. Do you play the Wii?

yes but not as much as when i was younger. im ready for our switch overlords to take over though

116. Are you listening to music right now?

nope

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

it’s ok, a good staple

118. Do you like Chinese food?

yes definitely

119. Favorite book?

i dont really have one...

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

im afraid of the unknown and when it’s dark everything becomes unknown

121. Are you mean?

sometimes, but i try not to be

122. Is cheating ever okay?

first instinct: no

but i guess there’s Always Exceptions blah blah blah

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

god no, i dont even buy white shirts bc i dont think they’ll stay clean

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

i believe in immediate attraction and then being lucky that your personalities are also compatible

125. Do you believe in true love?

relationships are built on the foundations of trust, respect, and care for each other

126. Are you currently bored?

a little but this is keeping me busy

127. What makes you happy?

nice looking things

128. Would you change your name?

i dont think so

129. What your zodiac sign?

Capricorn

130. Do you like subway?

honestly everyone shits on subway so much... im sorry....... i like subway.....

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

there’s too many unknown parameters in this for me to give a concrete answer

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

this is literally the same question as the one 122 questions ago

133. Favorite lyrics right now?

too hard to think of a specific one

134. Can you count to one million?

In Theory I Guess I Could

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

“i went to bed at 1am last night”

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

OPEN bc my cat needs to be able to get in

137. How tall are you?

5′ 8″, give or take 

138. Curly or Straight hair?

does frizzy wave count

139. Brunette or Blonde?

neither

140. Summer or Winter?

both ??

141. Night or Day?

night i guess

142. Favorite month?

January ;0

143. Are you a vegetarian?

nope but if i had to i could

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

milk

145. Tea or Coffee?

tea, coffee is icky

146. Was today a good day?

i barely did anything but yeah i guess so

147. Mars or Snickers?

neither, but i guess Snickers bc i dont know what’s in a Mars Bar

148. What’s your favorite quote?

“same” - me, constantly

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

i think they’re there but they either cant really do much or they cant be bothered messing with us

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? (via catscuddlingandyou)

An abridged dictionary is one that has been shortened to keep it from crushing desks and people’s laps.

tanks princeton review Word SMART 5th edition

WOW OK IM DONE THANKS FOR READING GOODBYE

if you love reading ask hells go check out @anonymousalchemist and @shanakin‘s responses as well

[gaybaconprincess]

I found an old Doc with a Marching Band AU so take it

Jericho / Joseph Wilson (Flute)

‘That one gay friend who has a better fashion sense than me’

Don’t pronounce his last name as ‘willis’ like the principal or he will f you up

And by that he means he’ll get his scary brass boyfriend to f you up

Probably the sassiest person in Band

He is an angry human espresso and if you look at Kyd Wykkyd for too long he’ll break your leg

Very protective of his batnerd

Kole is also a flute n they are very good buds

Vows to one day burn the school’s band uniforms so they have to buy new ones

Calls everyone ‘fam’

If it’s possible to be that one controversial archetype he will be it

He is also the school’s biggest male feminist

Bumblebee is the biggest female feminist

Also he likes penciling in weed symbols (despite the fact he has never touched a drug in his life) all over the school campus

Mainly only joined Band because the Wilson bunch were sitting at a family dinner once and somebody (he doesn’t even remember anymore like maybe ROse?? Maybe Father????) said that the only instrument he could play was his twangy guitar and ofc he took that as a cHALLENGE

Raven / Raven Roth (Clarinet)

Very dark humour

Only real friend is Jericho bc they like to complain about Grayson together

Also Jericho is the only person who laughs at her jokes

Has more power over people than she lets on

Dating the head cheerleader helps too (angel)

Pretty chill

Not v good at physical fighting but just her all around dry personality will intimidate you

The woodwind section is filled with very violent human gnomes it seems

she has a tumblr indeed but trust me yOU DONT WANT IT

its filled with actual witch spells and v v gory things 

Joined Band for the extra credit, stayed for the time away from home

Her home consists of her usually absent mother and emotionally abusive father (my way of inserting Trigon in here somewhere) and Joey is really the only person that knows and she can just vent to

They’ve had well over a few crying sessions

 SeeMore / Seymour Johnson (Saxophone)

Joined band bc he’s a broke idiot in need of a scholarship

Joined saxophone because mEMES

Plays ‘we are number one’ every f-ing time Kyd so much as looks at him

bf(f)’s with the Herald

Totally thirsty for some brass trumpet boy but totally not the Herald oh no

(it’s so the Herald)

Has hit himself in the face with his sax thirteen too many times

Wears the nerdiest glasses possible but no one can say shit bc he’s the best marcher they’ve got really

Chillest of the chill you will ever meet

Cries @ disney movies

Probably watches conspiracy theory videos in his free time

Is slowly attempting to bring tumblr humor into the real world

also afraid of chickens. look its a really long story k.

Joined Band to prove to his parents that nO HE IS NOT DOING DRUGS AFTER SCHOOL HE IS ACTUALLY ATTEMPTiNG to MAKE YOU PROUD

 The Herald / Malcolm Duncan (Trumpet)

Best friends w/ Jericho even tho Jericho regrets it

*Jericho walks into the Band Hall*

‘aND HIS NAME IS JOHN CENA’ *trumpet noises*

He and Seymour meme together

Is just obnoxious in general

Pulls candy and other food items out of nowhere at the worst times

Just wants people to hang out with after school. Hot Spot’s no fun and Jericho’s family is insane.

 BumbleBee / Karen Beecher (French Horn)

Is just way too tired for this

Mom friend

Doesn’t have time to deal with everyone’s shit

Joey can relate

‘malcolm duncan i dare you to blow that trumpet in my ear oNE MORE TIME’

Is everyone’s big sister but mainly Mal’s

Makeup game is always on point

Wants to kick Seymour and Mal in the throat everyday bc jUST KISS YOUR SEXUAL TENSION IS RUINING THE REHEARSAL

 Kyd Wykkyd / Elliot Knight (Trombone)

Toll pencil is dating smol espresso

Looks mean and scary but just wants hugs and colored pencils

‘Deal hugs not drugs’

Makes too many puns

Literally every other sentence has some hidden pun in it

Loves picking Joey up and carrying him around

Gives people really terrible nicknames

Biggest weab of them all

‘I sexually identify as Terezi Pyrope’

Don’t even say the word homestuck/undertale around him he’ll either start crying or laughing maniacally

‘What do you mEAN YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT RWBY IS’

Has memorized all of Light Yagami’s lines on Death Note

Quotes Steven Universe (mainly Pearl) on a daily basis

k like,,,,you think,,,you tHINK he’s the smart friend.

oH NO BUDDY ARE YOU WRONG

if you’ve ever seen any Roosterteeth video ever

He is Gavin Free.

The embodiment of ‘wot if...our legs...didn’t know they were lEGS???’

Joey just kinda shushes him and pretends to know what he’s talking about

Billy Numerous / William Strayer (Euphonium)

Mammoth’s ultimate wingman

‘God bless murica’

Mispronounces words on purpose to piss off Kyd and Raven

Hates his pointy marching shoes

Hides tennis balls in the saxophones to Seymour’s dismay

Got hit with a trombone once and then had to pay for it to be fixed

Totally not kyd’s

Likes to make fun of Joey’s height which is WHY he got hit with a trombone

Roots for BBQ places every time the Band stops to eat on a trip

‘Aight but...does Wykkyd is gay??’

Mammoth / Baran Flinders (Tuba)

Is the most intimidating person you will ever meet and he kNOWS IT he GLOATS IN THAT FACT

‘gEEZ YOU GUYS SHUT UP I DONT HAVE A THING FOR STARFIRE THATS DISGUSTinG’

‘We were just asking why she wasn’t at rehearsal today’

Is also a vry broke idiot but somewhat enjoys band

The aMOUNT of times he has been stopped by football coaches and borderline bribed to be on the team

Is the one who shamelessly sprints the whole way to the cafeteria everyday

‘Foods before dudes, sorry’

He and Billy often have eating competitions

Jericho lives in fear every time he’s not tardy for class

Also looks mean but will cRUSH YOu....with a bear hug

When asked what 2 plus 2 was he responded with a very startled and nervous 22

Kid Flash / Wally West (Percussion)

Look,,,,buddy,,,,amigo,,,,chum,,,,

He and Kyd Wykkyd have had a lil rivalry goin on since the fiRST TIME KYD STOLE HIS APPLE JUICE IN PRE-K

Y do you think he joined percussion… (it’s because percussion is usually seated behind trombones and Kyd hates drums and loud noises)

bUT on the plus side his ADHD is now a lot less terrifying

During practice he literally just plays Hall of Fame on repeat

‘No...no no….no no plEASE STOP TOUCHING MY HAIR’

(jokingly) chants the word ‘gay’ and slowly gets louder every time Kyd so much as sPEAKs

He and Kyd have sarcasm competitions

Also memes but less out loud and more…

‘Wally I sweAR TO GOD IF YOU DONT STOP TeXTING ME MEMES IN CLASS’

‘Wykkyd iS THAT AN WEED IM CALLING THE POLICE’ inside jokes

Jinx / Jaya Salem (Pit)

Just wants a nap

All the time

Someone get her an energy drink

Puts up with Kyd + Mammoth + Billy + See-More’s shit not to mention her little brother most of the time

It’s Gizmo. The little brother is Gizmo.

‘I just...want to just like...can I plug myself into a charger? Can I do that, is that a thing?’

Literally the only person out of her friend circle that passes most of her classes

dO NOT TOUCH HER CATS JUST DONT DO IT

‘Do you think if I concuss myself I can get out of practice for today?’

all of her jokes are also either self depricating or just insulting to others

insomniac

Punk Rocket / Thomas Leonard (Drum Major)

mOST IRRESPONSIBLE DRUM MAJOR EVER 0/10 WOULD NOT RECOMMEND

‘Well y’know...i’m already in a Band so like...how hard could Drum Major be?’

Very hard. He made a mistake. He regrets everything.

School Principal: ‘are you aware that your hair is white?’

Rocket: ‘are you aware that your a fUCKING SQUARE???’

He got suspended after that

‘Okay look I know it looks really gay that I’m riding on a motorcycle with my really hot buddy but it’s not - fuck that is really gay, maybe I’m really gay.’

One big bundle of ‘oh no’ when you pop the question of ‘what’s your sexuality’

Gets wAY TOO INTO the really big moments when directing on field

Fell of the pedestal his first game

Over time actually starts taking Band very seriously and enjoying it

Slade Wilson

funds the Band’s everything

Addie cooks for the Band and helps with fundraisers

also I just really need an AU where Slade is just,,,,a good dad,,,,Joey deserves a good dad k

he was off in the army for a while so he comes back and apparently Joey is not four anymore?? and he has a boyfriend???? and turned out to somehow be shorter than his own mother?????????

Joey made ‘when will my father return from the war’ jokes the entire time to cope

Slade is still getting used to things and the crowd and screaming of football games makes him v uncomfortable but he goes to support Joey

who is off to the side trying to avoid looking at his father who is now waving his hands frantically

Rose comes too but mainly to make fun of the entire Band

Grant’s already in college so he don’t give a shit

Literally everyone in the Band lOVES Mr. Wilson and Adeline but Joey just wants them to leave him alone

Slade is that one dad,,,,he tRIES SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND BAND HUMOR AND IT DOESNT WORK

still doesn’t know how he feels about Kyd 

Slade and Joey bond over Slade picking him up after practice and Joey iMMEDIATELY going into rant mode

‘tHIS HETERO A HOLE DAD YOU WOULDNT BELIEVE-’

surprisingly okay with Joey’s sexuality, he’s still getting used to it nonetheless

Mrs. and Mrs. Wykkyd

Kyd Wykkyd has two v lesbian moms and you can’t tell me otherwise like that’s my headcanon for him plus I love supportive gay parents that are better parents than the hets themselves

Kyd was adopted but they love their beautiful son v v much and he loves them

Kyd never really knew his biological parents and everyone acts like it’s a big deal but he he doesn’t?? care???? he knows who his parents are its Aarti Bindiya-Knight and Alison Knight duh

one of his moms is East Indian so he takes part in a lot of her culture just like his other mom does

he also gets vERY OFFENDED and filled with Righteous Anger when anyone discriminates or makes Indian jokes / lesbian jokes in class

Elliot is taller than both of his moms and usually has to bend down so they can hug him

Alison is American and very vERY kind hearted

Aarti has a very muscley stature and it taller than Alison. Her hair is cut short and curly and she looks like the person who will want to fight you and hug you at the same time.

Alison is v v short and has very light blonde hair that just kind wisps everywhere. V pale and really really likes sundresses.

Alison still tries to kiss Elliot on the cheek before he gets on the bus but Aarti holds her back so Elliot can run

she’s the cooking mom. she cooks. all the time. that’s how she shows her emotions.

‘Aar what if he forgot his backpack or his lunch do you think he’s doing okay what if someone is bullying him as we speak-’ ‘Ali. Ellie is fine. He is twice your height either way there is no way he is getting bullied.’

Alison got Elliot into drawing which he does a lot now

they are v v supportive of literally anything he does and most kids are actually kinda jealous. 

tHEY ARE THE OVEREXCiTeD PARENTS AT EVERY GAME

NEITHER KNOW WHATS GOING ON BUT THEIR SON IS DOING A THING SO THATS WHATS IMPORTANT

they still keep home videos from when Elliot was a baby despite his birthday wish being for them to burn all of the videos last year

Barry Allen

he’s the track coach at their school and everybody was ASTONISHED when he showed up to a football game

‘okay yeah I know where the track field is - can you all maybe chill I just wanna see my nephew hit his drums.’

He and Wally are the ‘Red headed Heathens’ of the school

a term coined by the principal himself

Barry is still trying to get Wally to join track (he is also still failing)

Blows his whistle like a fricking AIRHORN at games

Very big despite only working on his legs ever and also very affectionate so I hope you have a strong spine because he shows his appreciation via hugs

the only teacher with actual freckles

fRECKLES

‘I would give you some cool pep talk Wally but to be honest I have no idea what’s going on just go out and have fun.’

[vampyrslutton]

My Sides

What?! I was tagged? By @ts-anxiety-angst of all people?! I do not deserve this honor! Ive kind of wanted to do this! And i actually made a video with 3 of my sides as my final project for my video class so I already know my sides, but dont have them named. I alos kind of have like 6 because I can’t quite figure out how to combine some of them into one side.

Anxiety-Genderfluid-They/Them I myself am Genderfluid, and so is my Anxiety. They’re honestly a dick. They basically sit there, and make sure I that I feel like shit about myself even if I was feeling good. Basically the only positive thing they do is make me hang out with friends and go to stuff for fear we’ll miss something and be abandoned again. On the other hand though, they also make me over think going to things until I’m scared to go. They’re a jerk. Anyway, I picture them in black Harley Davidson boots, black pleather pants, black pleather biker vest with an androgynous hair style with a small ponytail, and the bags under their eyes from making sure I’m freaking out at 3 in the morning on a school night. They get along best with Schemes, and kind of hate Fandoms.

Fantasy-Male-He/Him Fantasy sits over on my more male identifying side and has been with me the second longest. I was obsessed with vampires and all things supernatural when I was 4 and I still am. As a result, he represents that love of myths, legends, and fantasy in all his vampiric glory. He literally has black dress shoes, black socks, black dress pants, a blood red dress shirt, red eyes, fangs, short black hair (dyed because mine is brown), and will sometimes wear a cape with a horribly cringy fake accent. He also harbors my creativity so is where my daydreams, fanfictions, and art come from as well as my love of acting. His personality is of refinement, sophistication, and gentlemanlyness. He likes Fandoms best despite how much she makes him cringe, and likes Perversion the least for their crudeness.

Fandoms-Female-She/Her She is the definition of that one cringey weeb scrolling through tumblr at all hours, openly going “OmG LOL sO RndM!!1!111!!!!!” that we all cringe about but secretly know we all have a small amount of. She wears black combat boots that kind of look like Maka Albarns, black and red school girl skirt, some sort of fandom shirt, black leather jacket with loads of buttons and pins, and hair died pink, purple, and red with a head band. She has the phandom catwhiskers, and is always speaking in refernces, old memes, and tumblr quotes without a care in the world. I guess she would harbour my Morality? She is incredibly bubbly with a screechy fangirl voice ,and just wants to have fun. She is where my inspiration for some creativity comes from which is why her and Fantasy get along so well. She’s also where my want to be a Voice Actor is. She gets along best with Fantasy, Schemes, and Perversion, but is basically Anxiety’s counter so doesn’t sit well with them.

Schemes-Genderfluid-They/Them I guess they could be considered my logic? They’re where most of my intellegenceis stored, basically where my evil plots come from and are my drama consultant when writing. They’re also the reason some have said I sould be an info broker. They’ve always been mischievious since we were little and were the first one as I’ve always liked to impress and or disturb adults with my knowledge. In the knowledge department, they have a fascination of loving to learn random facts that know one would take the time to learn or that they know sould disturb someone to know. They actually have an appreciation for zoology and biology while my other sides tend to focus on art and creativity. In terms of actual schemes, they’re always plotting how to mess with people, and if some one hurts me, you know they have the information to bring them down while making sure they never hurt anyone again. They like to be the big evil mastermind, but they still don’t want to hurt anyone unless they hurt us. They can easily manipulate and talk their way through anything. Schemes can be seen wearing gender neautral business casual in monochromes and dark reds and blues. While my other sides wear contacts, they wear business looking glasses. They say because the glare looks more evil, but its literally because we’re blind as a fucking bat without them. They’re best friends with Perversion, but due to some betrayals over the years, has become more cynical and is now close to Anxiety as well, working close with and manipulating them to avoid further betrayal. They don’t dislike anyone really as they recognize they’re all part of a whole so don’t see a point in disliking anybody.

Perversion-Female-She/Her “You and you’re search history are the reason we’re going to hell!” “*Smirks* Well you can’t spell Perversion without S.I.N.” Perversion or Sin, whichever you want to call her, she’s a tomboy and a major flirt. She is where my love of dirty jokes and fart humor comes from, and she isn’t afraid to make one whatever the situation. She loves working with Schemes to disturb people with a dirty joke or lewd info, just to see peoples recation. If she can slip an innuendo in somewhere, its already done. Now I said she’s a flirt and she is, but only if we’re dating someone and only towards that person otherwise its “Error 404: Witty comment not found. Insert dirty joke that will get us put in the brozone. Oh we’re at work? Stare and stutter like an idiot.” So basically she thinks, she’s a flirt, but she can’t for the life of her unless in costume. She doesn’t mind the BroZone. She’s comfortable there, and loves it there, but hates being there when she didn’t intend to be. Otherwise, she doesn’t mind and loves being one of the guys, and loves new guys’ reactions when she makes a dirty joke. She can be found wearing very tomboy attire, but in the most provacative way possible while still being perfectly decent cause, hey, we ain’t a hoe. She is best friends with Schemes, and loves meeting up with Fantasy and Fandoms to write fanfiction. She hates Anxiety because she blames them for our inability to flirt properly.

Lastly,

Adrenaline-Genderfluid-They/Them This crazy side is why people call me insane. They love ziplining while doing tricks, parasailing, skydiving, four-wheeling, dirt biking, and surfing. They’re also my love and skill or wrestling, weightlifting, martial arts, and boxing come from. They are my ability to take an extreme sport and in twenty minutes do it like I’ve been doing it all my life. They’re my determination, and passion, and my drive to keep up with the guys in a biologically female body. They are the reason I have a freakishly high pain tolerance and no fear. Basically if people think I’d be insane to try it, as long as it’s legal, Adrenaline’s motto will be “Hold my beer and watch this.” They’re the one that will make me put myself out there and talk to people every now and again. They also hold my minor obsession with piercing. They’re also the reason I’m thinking of learning pole dancing from watching Yuri!! on Ice, knife throwing from reading a fanfiction wear Thomas’s Anxiety knew how to throw knives, and I am voodoo after watching Buzzfeed Unsolved Supernatural despite Fantasy telling us not to fuck with that shit without proper training. Adrenaline will probably get me killed one day haha! They can be found in cargo shorts, hiking boots (despite not hiking), a tank top, sunglasses, and some sort of head gear depending on what they’re doing with a grin that says “This is gonna be awesome!” They’ll also have a knife hidden at all times so they can kick someone’s ass if hand to hand won’t work, but can otherwise take someone down that way. Adrenaline loves all the sides except for Anxiety. They blame them for our lack of friends, and know they aren’t wrong.

Did i do this right? I hope I did. Um, I don’t really have any tumblr friends yet so no one to tag so I guess tag yourself if you haven’t done this yet?

[andystanberg]

~ still not gay ~

Word Count: 2 800

Genre: chat fic, coming out, coming to terms with sexuality, humour

Pairing(s): phan, tiny mention of kickthestickz

Warnings: swearing, so many spelling/grammar mistakes (all on purpose as it’s a chat fic), mentioned homophobia, sexual humour (not a lot)

Summary:

crabstickzzz has added PJ to the chat. PJ: what? dannyboy: chris and co. think im gay

A/N Shout out to the (formerly) ~ still not gay ~ chat, thanks for not believing I was straight. (Loosely based off my own unconventional coming out.)

AUGUST 12TH

dan is gay

crabstickzzz has added PJ to the chat.

PJ: what?

dannyboy: chris and co. think im gay

PJ: you are.

crabstickzzz: SUCK IT HOWELL

LouiseP: Chris, Dan clearly isn’t ready for blowjobs yet.

dannyboy: IM NOT GAY

PJ: sure.

crabstickzzz: wat about ur crush on phil

AmazingPhil: His what now

dannyboy: i dont have a crush on phil

PJ: sure.

dannyboy: im straight guys cmon

PJ has changed the chat name to dan is in denial and gay.

dannyboy: oh for fucks sake

dannyboy: seriously guys im 100% sure im straight

PJ: sure.

-

AUGUST 15TH

dan is in denial and gay

AmazingPhil: Why is the name always about Dan

LouiseP: This group chat is dedicated to whether or not Dan is gay. And memes.

crabstickzzz: thats all we talk about so theres no point in creating another

PJ: i’ve been in this group chat for two days and it’s true.

dannyboy: why does it matter what i am

crabstickzzz: bc u wont admit ur gay! we r teaching u to love and accept urself 4 who u r!!!

dannyboy: bullshit

AmazingPhil: Maybe we should lay off Dan a bit

dannyboy: thank you filip

AmazingPhil: Never mind please continue

dannyboy changed the chat name to i hate you all

-

Private chat between dannyboy and AmazingPhil.

AmazingPhil: You’re not mad, are you?

dannyboy: no

AmazingPhil: Sure?

dannyboy: its fine. theyre joking and having fun. i just dont get why they care so much about my sexuality though

AmazingPhil: Maybe Crabstickzzz and PJ have a crush on you and Louise is trying to wingman both???

dannyboy: yeah right. can you imagine?

AmazingPhil: You never know

dannyboy: for starters, nobody has, or ever had, or ever will have a crush on me, and secondly, crabstickzzz and pj are dating

AmazingPhil: WHAT? WHEN? HOW?

dannyboy: well i dont know for sure but cmon

AmazingPhil: Oh good. I thought I had missed their big reveal

AmazingPhil: Also don’t be so sure about the crush thing

dannyboy: what? who has a crush on me?!

dannyboy: PHIL LESTER ANSWER ME

-

NOVEMBER 20TH

i hate you all

dannyboy: GUYS OH MY GOD DID YOU SEE THE PIC ZAC EFRON JUST POSTED

LouiseP: Who’s Zack?

PJ: oh boy.

dannyboy: HOW DARE YOU! ZAC**** IS THE ACTOR OF TROY BOLTON AKA MY SPIRIT ANIMAL

AmazingPhil: I JUST SAW IT TOO HE LOOKS SO GOOD

dannyboy: I KNOW RIGHT?????

LouiseP: daNIEL

PJ: HAH KNEW IT.

dannyboy: what

crabstickzzz: ur not good at being straight, my friend

dannyboy: oh come on! i may be straight but im not BLIND!

PJ: sure.

dannyboy: phil back me up!

AmazingPhil: Dan has a point.

crabstickzzz: spoil sport

crabstickzzz has kicked AmazingPhil from the chat.

dannyboy: OI

LouiseP: Chris, add him back in.

crabstickzzz: fineeee only cause ur scary

crabstickzzz has added AmazingPhil to the chat.

dannyboy has changed the chat name to welcome back fil.

AmazingPhil has changed the chat name to chris sucks.

dannyboy: i second that

crabstickzzz: wat did i do???

PJ: you’re really asking yourself that?

-

NOVEMBER 25TH

chris sucks

LouiseP: It’s been five days are you all dea?

crabstickzzz: yep im so dea

LouiseP: Oh shut up, like you can talk.

PJ: he never stops talking. don’t encourage him, for my sake.

crabstickzzz: do not

AmazingPhil: Do too

PJ: do too.

dannyboy: do too

crabstickzzz: alright i get it

LouiseP: Do too.

LouiseP: Whoops.

crabstickzzz: watevr

crabstickzzz: so dan have u figured out that ur gay yet

dannyboy: for the last time, im like 99% sure im straight

PJ: that’s 1% less than last time.

crabstickzzz: progress!!!

dannyboy: no its just that if evan peters wanted to fuck me, i wouldnt say no

LouiseP: Hardly anyone would.

dannyboy: see? it doesnt prove anything

AmazingPhil: well…

dannyboy: I THOUGHT YOU WERE ON MY SIDE

PJ: welcome to the dark side.

AmazingPhil: I just go for whatever side is winning! Can’t blame a man for surviving

dannyboy: thats not the saying

AmazingPhil: It is now!

dannyboy: weve been over this! you cant steal sayings and try to change them

AmazingPhil: I just did

dannyboy: why am i friends with you

crabstickzzz: bc u like him

dannyboy changed the chat name to ~ still not gay ~.

PJ: sure.

LouiseP: You say that a lot.

PJ: it’s because it’s needed. if dan didn’t deny the blatantly obvious, i wouldn’t have to be sarcastic all the time.

crabstickzzz: dont lie to urself

-

NOVEMBER 27TH

~ still not gay~

dannyboy: oh my god oh m y god

AmazingPhil: What?!

dannyboy: fcukin evan peters in ahs

AmazingPhil: ARE YOU WATCHING WITHOUT ME

dannyboy: maybe…

AmazingPhil: BETRAYAL

crabstickzzz: gayyyyyy

dannyboy: fuck off let me have this chris

PJ: yeah chris, fuck off.

dannyboy: thanks pj

PJ: it’s okay. also...

dannyboy: what

PJ: gayyyyy.

AmazingPhil: Okay but Dan has a point

LouiseP: True!

dannyboy: phil and louise are my only friends

crabstickzzz: danyul they both like guys doesnt that say something

dannyboy: psh whatever

-

DECEMBER 25TH

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: ugh im stuck with sucky wifi away from home :(

AmazingPhil: Aw! Does that mean no skype tonight?

dannyboy: im using my data rn and its so slow, skype would be a nightmare. sorry phil

AmazingPhil: I’ll see you when you get back, then.

dannyboy: yeah :)

crabstickzzz: ugh stop flirting

PJ: yeah, get your own chat.

LouiseP: I think it’s cute.

dannyboy: yeah okay im leaving

PJ: he didn’t deny the flirting part though.

-

JANUARY 1ST

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: new years and no one to kiss wow what a surprise

AmazingPhil: My offer still stands ;)

LouiseP: WAIT, WHAT OFFER?!

crabstickzzz: yeah wat offer

PJ: is no one gonna..?

PJ: okay fine I guess I’ll have to do it.

PJ: gayyyyyyy

AmazingPhil: I wish

dannyboy: keep dreaming philly ;)

LouiseP: I ship it.

PJ: join the club.

dannyboy: can anybody read what the title of this chat is

crabstickzzz: we can we just dont care

PJ: the only reason no one has changed it is because of its irony.

-

JANUARY 12TH

Private chat between dannyboy and AmazingPhil

dannyboy: ahH EVAN PETERS

AmazingPhil: Dan are you sure you’re not gay

dannyboy: well i mean i have liked girls before so even if i did like guys i wouldnt be gay

AmazingPhil: Bi?

dannyboy: maybe idk

dannyboy: but anyway EVAN PETERS

-

JANUARY 16TH

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: this chat is so quiet

AmazingPhil: For the first time in forever

dannyboy: did you literally just reference Frozen

LouiseP: What’s wrong with Frozen?!

AmazingPhil: Yeah Dan what’s wrong with Frozen

PJ: he probably thinks its gay lmao.

crabstickzzz: dans literally the epitome of no homo

dannyboy: wow what a big word you used there chris

dannyboy: do you even know what it means

dannyboy: also i’ll have you know i have proudly never said no homo

AmazingPhil: I’ve tested that ;)

PJ: WOAH WHAT DID PHIL JUST MAKE A DIRTY JOKE?

LouiseP: PHIL, I THOUGHT I RAISED YOU TO BE A GOOD CHILD.

crabstickzzz: DAN WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HIM

dannyboy: wouldnt you like to know

crabstickzzz: wht te h fcuk

PJ: … GAYYYYYYY.

LouiseP: I second that.

AmazingPhil: I hope that

dannyboy: that doesnt make sense

PJ: okay, straight boy, he meant ‘fil hopes you’re gay, as in attracted to boys, no “no homo”’.

dannyboy: im not an idiot

crabstickzzz: debateble

dannyboy: debatable* dumbass

-

JANUARY 30TH

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: HAPPY BIRTHDAY PHIL MY BEST FRIEND

LouiseP: Happy birthday! Wow, January went by quickly.

dannyboy: yeah can you believe that Phil Lester created January and the world was so hyped for his birthday it sped up time

PJ: oh my god, guys, holy shit.

crabstickzzz: what

PJ: DAN DIDN’T TALK ABOUT HOW BIRTHDAYS ARE A STEP CLOSER TO DEATH. AM I ALIVE?

crabstickzzz: hoLY FUCK UR RIGHT

LouiseP: Dan, you feeling okay?

dannyboy: jeez sorry for wishing my friend a happy birthday

AmazingPhil: I thought it was sweet

crabstickzzz: yeah we get it u love each other

PJ: they’re so cute but so gross.

dannyboy: i dont like phil cmon guys

AmazingPhil: I thought we had something :( you even forgot to talk about the inevitability of death for me :((((

PJ: hey, at least he didn’t say he doesn’t like guys or reference the chat name.

-

FEBRUARY 3RD

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: ugh people suck

AmazingPhil: What happened?

dannyboy: nothing

PJ: sure.

LouiseP: You can tell us, Dan.

crabstickzzz: as long as its not blackmail worthy bc in that case dont be so sure

LouiseP: Chris.

crabstickzzz: i was joking, ofc he can tell us

dannyboy: nvm, i said it was nothing

-

Private chat between dannyboy and AmazingPhil

AmazingPhil: Seriously what happened

dannyboy: one of my old friends from uni keeps asking me when im getting a girlfriend or making jokes about my lack of love life every time he sees me and im sick of it

AmazingPhil: You’ve complained about him before and it you never seemed too bothered

dannyboy: yeah well…

AmazingPhil: ?

dannyboy: i know it shouldnt bother me but this time when i tried to ignore all of his questions about getting a girlfriend or whatever he said “you’re gonna turn gay and be alone”

dannyboy: like i know gay isnt an insult but at the same time it bugs me? is that wrong?

AmazingPhil: I don’t think so. Maybe it was just that he said something like that in the first place

dannyboy: maybe… or like some internalised homophobia idk i feel shitty

dannyboy: im just so tired of everyone asking me when im gonna get a relationship

dannyboy: my mum has been making hints at it lately

AmazingPhil: I love your mum but everyone should back off

dannyboy: this is cheesy but you’re the best

AmazingPhil: No problem <3

dannyboy: <3

-

FEBRUARY 4TH

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: youll all be happy to know that i almost accidentally kissed a guy today

crabstickzzz: o H YM GOD DANYUL WELCOME TO THE GAY SIDE

dannyboy: a l m o s t + a c c i d e n t a l l y

PJ: sure.

dannyboy: i thought you had stopped with the sarcastic sures

PJ: keep dreaming, howell.

crabstickzzz: shut up time for the important qs

crabstickzzz: was it fil

LouiseP: Please for the love of god let it be Phil.

AmazingPhil: Let what be me

dannyboy: they’re freaking out over the almost kiss

AmazingPhil: Oh! Sorry guys, it wasn’t me

crabstickzzz: NOOOOOOOOO

PJ: sure.

LouiseP: Liesssssssssssssss.

dannyboy: it was this cute guy who ive been friends with for a while and we were messing around and whispering in each others ears to waste time during some meeting that was probably important and i turned just as he was whispering something and our lips almost touched

dannyboy: we jumped back just in time

PJ: there was so much gay in that that I can’t even form a coherent reason as to why it was gay.

AmazingPhil: Can you believe that Dan cheated on me :(((((()(09()

crabstickzzz: CUTE GUY? WHISPERING IN EARS? HOWL U R GAY OK

PJ: good news, chris just said my reasons for me.

LouiseP: Who’s the lucky guy?

dannyboy: first of all, weve been over this. i know when someone is cute, guy or girl. second of all, we were whispering creepy stuff like “mayonnaise” to try and freak each other out and third of all, not telling because id know you guys would stalk him

AmazingPhil: I know who it is ;)

PJ: i bet it’s phil.

dannyboy: nope. i said CUTE guy

AmazingPhil: HEY!

dannyboy: kidding. but no, it wasnt phil

-

FEBRUARY 8TH

~ still not gay ~

LouiseP: Alright, for today we put a halt on the usual Dan is gay discourse.

dannyboy: thank you friend

PJ: why? did someone die?

crabstickzzz: BREAKING TRADITION IS NOT ALLWD!!!

LouiseP: Shush, let me talk about a cute guy I saw today.

LouiseP: Anyway how do I ask him out?

AmazingPhil: Wait until Valentines and anonymously get him a rose.

dannyboy: ask him out or let your feelings pile up and watch him inevitably move on because you’re too scared to make a move

PJ: talk to him on the internet until you become best friends and be gay oops i meant straight for each other.

crabstickzzz: love poems via mysterious skype calls no one gets to know the contents of

LouiseP: The last two are unrealistic. Who talks to a stranger on the internet??? Stanger danger!1!!1!

dannyboy: fil i think theyre picking on us

AmazingPhil: Fair enough

dannyboy: YOURE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE

-

FEBRUARY 11TH

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: i cant wait to get nothing on valentines

LouiseP: Same.

AmazingPhil: Same

PJ: same.

crabstickzzz: sam

crabstickzzz: samr*

crabstickzzz: SAME****

dannyboy: this chat is so depressing

dannyboy: also learn how to spell

crabstickzzz: np

crabstickzzz: no*

-

FEBRUARY 13TH

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy changed the chat name to ~ not gay, but bi ~

crabstickzzz: I KNEW IR

dannyboy: shush

crabstickzzz: I FCUKIGN KNEWS IT

dannyboy: you saw nothing

crabstickzzz: YOURE BI

dannyboy: i was right about not being gay though

crabstickzzz: BUT I KNEW YOU WERENT STRAIGHT

PJ: WOAH WOAH WAIT WHAT’S HAPPENIGN OH MT FGDPL.

LouiseP: PJ ISN’T USING FULL STOPS!!! HE’S BROKEN!

LouiseP: DAN, YOU’VE BROKEN ALL OF US!!!

dannyboy: I SAID I WAS 99% SURE I WAS STRAIGHT

crabstickzzz: I WAS RIGHT AND YOU WERE WRONG

dannyboy: NO YOU THOUGHT I WAS GAY

dannyboy: WE WERE ALL WRONG

PJ: S T I L L.

AmazingPhil: This is so amusing

LouiseP: WHY ISN’T PHIL JOINING OUR FREAKING OUT?!

dannyboy: … might have came out already yesterday maybe haha dont kill me

PJ: WHAT?

crabstickzzz: FUK U FIL AND DANYUL

LouiseP: AND YOU’RE ONLY TELLING US NOW??????

dannyboy: yeah well coming out to phil was the first time ive ever done it so it was a little emotionally exhausted and i shook so much that i needed to recharge

AmazingPhil: He was so nervous but I’m proud of him

PJ: yeah, same.

LouiseP: I second that!

crabstickzzz: I FUCKING NKEW TOU WERE GAY

AmazingPhil: I thought we had gotten past this bit

dannyboy: chris, read the new name. im still not gay, just extremely bi

crabstickzzz: sry but i cant believe ur finally coming out

LouiseP: If you don’t mind me asking, what made you realise you were bi?

dannyboy: it all started with this one guy in high school who was so fucking hot and i had like a teensy bit of a crush on him and omg he was so pretty and one time i saw him literally leaning against a wall with his hair messed up and i died

dannyboy: i thought it was a one-time thing and i wasnt really sure if it counted considering ive only ever been attracted to girls before that, but recently ive just come to terms with that and the other thing

crabstickzzz: WHICH IS

dannyboy: nnnnnnnothing

PJ: sure.

AmazingPhil: Ha you guys aren’t on best friend level, so of course you don’t know

crabstickzzz: r00d

dannyboy: dont worry he doesnt know either, hes just being a little shit

AmazingPhil: Love you too

LouiseP: Can you imagine how much we would’ve freaked out over Phil’s message in August?

PJ: seasons change and people do too, apparently.

-

FEBRUARY 14TH

~ not gay, but bi ~

dannyboy: [image attached] someone sent me this chocolate rose with a note saying “- Voldemort” i wonder who that could be??!?!?

PJ: yeah, can anyone think of a super pale nerd who likes Harry Potter almost as much as Dan does and knows where he lives??? I’m coming up blank!!!1!!

LouiseP: Awwww, that’s so sweet!

crabstickzzz: barf

AmazingPhil: Thanks Louise I spent 2 whole pounds on it

dannyboy: spending so much for his boyfriend ew sap stop wasting money

PJ: bOYFRIEND?

crabstickzzz: WAIT I THOUGHT U 2 WERE JUST BEING WEIRD AND PLATONIC COUPLEY LIKE U ALWAYS R AND UR TELLING ME UR DATING

AmazingPhil: It turns out that the “other thing” Dan mentioned was him liking me

dannyboy: and also staring at his lips whenever he talks to me and thinkingaboutkissingthemmaybehah

LouiseP: CONGRATS, GUYS!

PJ: this is like my OTP.

crabstickzzz: *teenage girl voice* OH MY GOD MY OTP

dannyboy: lets leave before they start being weird

AmazingPhil: They’re our friends, don’t worry so much

crabstickzzz: so like did your first kiss involve tongue or

AmazingPhil: Yeah, bye.

crabstickzzz: he didnt say no

LouiseP: cHRIS.

dannyboy: if you must know, it involved NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS

dannyboy has left the chat.

AmazingPhil has left the chat.

PJ: …there was definitely tongue.

LouiseP: Agreed.