#no he subido mucho en un largo tiempo

[jackredfieldwasmyjacob]

pero q paso con salma, que hizo? quien la esta molestando ?? 😾

bua anon te vas a cagar

lo de salma creo que viene desde el concurso, no sé si sabes lo que pasó entre violeta o ella pero por si acaso te lo resumo:

cuando volvieron de navidad, salma había leído bastantes cosas, y nada más volver estuvo hablando de cómo había fans que veían cosas dónde no las había, 'y no veían cosas que sí ocurrían'. a todo esto por cierto, había ciertas (las kivis) que no tragaban a salma (que era muy amiga de denna y violeta desde los castings) realmente sin ningún motivo? bueno yo creo que hay un motivo pero no voy a entrar en ello.

claro todes nos quedamos ???? porque no sabíamos qué decía. entonces se vio como se metió con violeta a las duchas, y salieron un tiempo después, con salma estando tristísima de repente, y violeta muy distante. en clase de abril ella vio que salma estaba mal y le preguntó, pero salma le dijo que era un tema personal, que no podía ayudar.

Y LUEGO LLEGÓ LA NOCHE, en la que de repente salió como salma estaba llorando en el comedor junto a martin, y ella iba diciendo cosas como 'con lo que yo he estado para ella...' 'que ahora no quiera estar...' cosas así. de la conversación, dedujimos que al parecer salma y violeta estaban durmiendo juntas durante la academia, y que salma quería más pero como violeta tenía novia le dijo que iba a cortar con ella en navidad. y no pasó, así que salma estaba depre. la cosa es que al día siguiente estaban las dos super juntas y riéndose todo el rato, y por cosas encriptadas que contó salma a lo largo de esa semana a naiara y creo que a alex? no me acuerdo a quien más pero bueno, que básicamente parecía que a violeta le gustaba salma más de lo que ella creía, y que seguían durmiendo juntas y puede que algo más ?

esa fue la última semana de salma, fue expulsada en la siguiente gala. entonces. las kivis dijeron que eso se lo había inventado salma para que la salvaran y votaron en masa para expulsarla, porque era mala malísima que quería poner a violeta como infiel (a todo esto las kivis estaban convencidas de que kiki y violeta estaban juntas), y bueno, estaban convencidas de que a violeta no le podía gustar salma (porque como podía alguien tan guapa como violeta estar con salma que es butch y gorda en vez de kiki que es femme y pequeña xd).

en fin. que salma salió, y desde entonces las kivis no han parado ni un puto día de soltar mierda sobre ella. violeta tuvo que subir un comunicado cuando salió para que pararan por el hate. cuando salieron violeta y salma estaban mucho juntas (pero si salma era una mala malísima que se había inventado todo !!! no puede ser !!!) y en general parecen ser amigas, todo normal chill. pero las kivis no paran de meterse con salma por literalmente respirar. ya ha tenido que irse varias veces de twitter por el hate.

hace un par de días salma subió este tweet. hay que decir que últimamente está mucho con la gente del piso sobao y no mucho con violeta y denna como en los castings; literalmente viven juntos es normal que pasen más tiempo juntos.

si te metes a los citados, la mitad o más son kivis dando por culo y metiendo mierda de ella. por la cara. ella tuvo que poner un tweet que acabo de ver que ha borrado (probablemente también por hate) diciendo algo así como que eso podría ser una frase que ha visto en pinterest o cualquier cosa sin importancia que no tenga que ver con ot y aún así la mitad de los citados eran con hate. básicamente está hasta el coño (con razón).

por último, hoy una kivi ha subido un tweet en el que hacía un edit de naiara dando like a un edit kivi de tiktok (nai es la mejor amiga de salma por cierto), como dando a entender que hasta naiara prefería a las kivi antes que salma.

madre naiara, que imagino que estará igual que salma, ha saltado a responderla

ha respondido a más cosas que luego ha borrado, y ha terminado con un

(las salmonas son las fans de salma)

por ahora salma, álvaro y paul (que justo después se ha puesto los likes privados - es el segundo más hateado por las kivis y de hecho se fue de twitter por el hate) han dado rt a ese último tweet. tiene pinta de que están todes (o casi todes) hasta las narices de las kivis y sobre todo del hate injustificado a salma, porque es una barbaridad de verdad.

[labitacoradelhombresolitario]

Mono de tinta

He pasado ciento sesenta y ocho fotos del iphone con el que me hice en noviembre al ordenador portátil que utilizo en los últimos tiempos para mis asuntos alimenticios y de escritura creativa. Unas horas tranquilas en mi estudio, escuchando música barroca para guitarra en el tubo de sonido y poniendo en orden imágenes, mientras caía la tarde de principios de marzo, fría y algo desapacible, sobre el barrio y sobre Madrid. He reorganizado algunas instantáneas en mi flickr y subido tres nuevas fotos a esa plataforma: O’Donnell y La realidad y el deseo, para el álbum “Ser y tiempo”; y T1 para el álbum de retratos y autorretratos “Imágenes del artista cumpliendo vida”. Estoy contento. Ese fotoblog, como varias veces tengo dicho, es más literario que estrictamente fotográfico, y me gusta pensar que hasta pictórico: Lucian Freud y el inevitable Hopper son dos de sus referencias principales (alguien hoy en día diría “referentes”, pero yo no soy “moderno” en el sentido actual). Es un poco turbador llevar un diario fotográfico; el paso del tiempo se acelera sobremanera cuando su minutero avanza en forma de fotogramas, y la evidencia gráfica nos devuelve una a veces angustiosa mirada cuando posamos sucesivamente en ella la mirada. Never mind. Habré de citar de nuevo a Alan Watts, en una de sus impagables charlas de los sesenta: “You’ve got all the time in the world”; tienes todo el tiempo del mundo. Hace poco leí no sé exactamente dónde (puede que en Il Gattopardo, que recientemente terminé) que lo que había que aprender a odiar, o lo que el ser humano acababa odiando, o lo que al hombre se le hacía forzosamente odioso, era la eternidad. Me dio que pensar, la reflexión. No sé si estoy de acuerdo, porque todavía no acabo de entender a ciencia cierta lo que Lampedusa —era Lampedusa, estoy ahora seguro— quería decir con esa frase; pero a mí en cualquier caso el pensamiento de la eternidad me resulta sumamente terapéutico y tranquilizador, de la misma curiosa manera en que solaza esa otra reflexión de Don Fabrizio al principio de la mencionada gran novela del aristócrata italiano: “Mientras hay muerte hay esperanza”. Honda y estremecedora rumia. Supongo que de significado muy distinto para quien sea creyente, y específicamente cristiano, y quien no. (¿Soy yo creyente? ¿Soy yo cristiano? ¡Esas preguntas íntimas no se formulan en pública sociedad! De todos modos alguien dijo de mí —fue concretamente mi querido amigo Luis Alberto de Cuenca, en la reciente presentación de mi poemario Pasos en el corredor— que soy siempre, en mi escritura, “connotativo”; y desde luego me gusta dejar tanto entre línea y línea como en las líneas mismas.)      Leí por cierto una traducción inglesa de El gatopardo: la de Archibald Colquhoun (rimbombante apellido; tal vez de origen normando, como algunos de los más ilustres que se dan en Inglaterra, donde se habló francés durante mucho tiempo como lengua oficial). Iba a leer la versión española, del prolífico traductor y excelente poeta Fernando Gutiérrez, pero finalmente me decanté, como casi siempre cuando se trata de obras escritas en idiomas que no sean ni el español ni el inglés, por mi lengua materna. Y efectivamente: Il Gattopardo es sin duda una extraordinaria —quizá más bien maravillosa— novela, como acertadamente me comentaba hace poco un lector de esta bitácora. Aunque algunos “peros” me reserve, que quizá desarrolle con más detalle en algún otro momento, porque el libro no me acaba, del todo, de “encajar”; pero esa es una cuestión que no tiene tal vez demasiada importancia, pues en su conjunto El gatopardo me extasió, y sobre todo la parte inicial, junto con la parte que tiene lugar en la finca de Donnafugata, y cómo no, el largo pasaje final que narra el óbito del Príncipe de Salina.

     Y bueno. Hasta aquí creo que voy a llegar hoy. Seguramente tenía alguna cosa más que decir o contar, pero uno de los placeres de la escritura de “libre asociación” que tanto me gusta practicar es precisamente el que comporta lo que su propio nombre indica: dejarme llevar en largos y plácidos (o no tan plácidos) meandros por el fértil territorio que el río del numen desee hacerme atravesar.      Hacía ya diez días que no actualizaba la Bitácora, y hoy sentía verdadero “mono de tinta”; y nunca mejor dicho, en el caso de la presente entrada o en relación con ella, porque acabo de redactar esto a mano, con la Parker 51 que un día fue de mi padre y es uno de mis tesoros más preciados. Ahora, saciado de tinta negra vertida sobre las hojas cuadriculadas de una de mis múltiples libretas rojas (la más antigua, en esta ocasión), me siento profundamente satisfecho y aliviado. Grafía de azabache —uso Quink de color negro— entre robustas tapas de cartón bermellón. ¿Cabe mejor combinación? A Onetti le encantaba “dibujar” la escritura, sintiendo el roce del grafito —también yo soy devoto del lápiz, como los antiguos periodistas— en la superficie del papel. A mí me pasa algo parecido; y esta tarde me he hecho el regalo de prometerme que a partir de ahora volveré mucho más a menudo a la pluma y el papel. ¡Doble trabajo! Porque luego hay que picar lo escrito, y pasarlo a ordenador. Esa labor, sin embargo, es también placer sobre placer.

ROGER WOLFE · 7 de marzo de 2023

[mesientotanamada]

Dios tiene un tiempo para cada uno

Demasiadas veces me quejo o hasta me enfado porque a la gente que me rodea le pasan las cosas que yo llevo un tiempo pidiendo. Le pido a Dios que me regale algo, y muchas veces veo como alguien más disfruta de ellas antes que yo. Y como yo soy muy envidiosa y egoísta, en cambio de alegrarme por ellas, me enfado. Con ellas y con Dios. Lo veo como algo injusto y le reprocho a Dios que yo me las merezco más, que yo llevo más tiempo esperándolas.

Ayer viví ese sentimiento un par de veces a lo largo del día; al hablarlo con mi marido me di cuenta de que siempre había pensado solo en mi al decir que Dios tiene un tiempo para cada cosa. Porque no es que Dios tenga un tiempo solo para que cada cosa se cumpla en mi vida, sino que también tiene tiempos diferentes para cada persona. Dios tiene que prepararme a mi para recibir Sus bendiciones, pero no significa que yo sea la única que me las merezca o que las esté pidiendo. Y que mientras yo esté esperando, alguien más las reciba, no significa que yo no las vaya a obtener nunca, sino que esa otra persona ha sido preparada antes que yo para vivirlas, solo ha recorrido un camino en el que yo todavía no he ido.

Porque las cosas llevan Su tiempo.

"Mirad cómo el labrador espera el precioso fruto de la tierra, aguardando con paciencia hasta que reciba la lluvia temprana y tardía. Tened también vosotros paciencia, y afirmad vuestros corazones." Santiago 5:7-8

Lo veo por ejemplo con un embarazo. Llevo dos meses y medio casada y aún no me he quedado embarazada. No pasa nada, no tengo prisa, pero al estar rodeada de personas que esperaron su primer hijo a las dos semanas de la boda, me siento un poco rara y me pregunto por qué a ellas Dios les dio un hijo tan rápido y a mi no. Y la respuesta que el Señor me da es muy sencilla: "Te estoy preparando". Que Dios aún no me haya regalado quedarme embarazada, mientras que muchas otras mujeres tuvieron un bebé más rápido, no significa que yo tenga que enfadarme con Él o tenerle envidia a las demás. Solo significa que no es mi momento, que tengo que disfrutar de mi vida con mi marido, arreglar juntos nuestra casa, y ya, cuando estemos listos, Dios nos dará algo más.

Y me pasa mucho también con la música, que llevo años deseando cantar en un determinado Festival, y siempre terminan actuando otros cantantes, emergentes como yo, muchos con menos experiencia que yo: Dios me ayuda a entender que el hecho de que yo aún no haya subido a ese escenario, no es motivo para creer que yo no me lo merezco y que Él no me lo quiera regalar nunca. Solo es para que yo siga ensayando, esforzándome, y cuando esté lista, si es de Dios, yo también podré cantar en ese lugar, y será maravilloso.

Me doy cuenta con estas situaciones que me falta aún mucho por aprender y por trabajar, y que Dios es muy paciente conmigo. Soy muy quejica y desagradecida. Y envidiosa. Le pido a Dios que me ayude a valorar más lo que sí tengo, en cambio de estar siempre mirando lo que falta, o teniéndole envidia a las personas que tienen algo que yo anhelo.

Dios lo ha hecho todo estupendo conmigo y en mi vida. Lo ha hecho todo hermoso, a Su tiempo. No me ha regalado nada cuando no iba a saber disfrutarlo, sino que siempre me ha preparado, me ha hecho crecer y madurar, para poder luego vivir plenamente esa bendición.

"Te alabaré, porque asombrosa y maravillosamente he sido hecho; maravillosas son tus obras, y mi alma lo sabe muy bien." Salmos 139:14

El tiempo de Dios es perfecto, y tengo que dejar de quererlo todo cuando y como yo quiero. Él sabe cuando entregarme lo que deseo y lo que necesito. Le pido que me siga enseñando a vivir en paz la espera y a ser más paciente.

"Todo tiene su tiempo, y todo lo que se quiere debajo del cielo tiene su hora." Eclesiastés 3:1

[redblossom]

Cada vez que leo esta historia me dan unas enormes ganas de besar al Jihan hasta el cansancio. ¿Soy la única? Porque Dios, escribes tan bien a ambos que es inexplicable. En fin, entro a mi desglose de siempre. 1- Siento que Joshua se aleja más y más de Bunny y no sé si lo está haciendo inconsciente o conscientemente. Hay algo que no está diciendo y esas pesadillas son la prueba de ello. Me gusta que tenga su hogar en ella pero al mismo tiempo siento que le cuesta encontrar un balance entre su relación y su trabajo. Ocupo que se tomen un descanso bien largo los 3 y hablen de lo que esperan, ocupan y quieren, o esta relación se va a ir a la basura.

2- Se me hizo muy soft como Hannie no quería que todo se relacionara en lo sexual, me recordó mucho a Edward y Bella en Breaking Dawn, como Edward la cansaba para que no tuvieran relaciones jsjsjs. Claro que Hannie es un caballero y nada como Edward, pero me dio risa ese gesto. Also...¿él siendo rough? Christ...girl, I was sweating buckets. ¿Qué necesidad tengo de que Hannie me haga esto? Ninguna, pero Dios. Ocupo más escenas así, pls.

3- CHOI SEUNGCHEOL, EL HOMBRE QUE ERES, EN SERIO. Me emocioné de más porque me encantan los 95z y amo muchísimo su dinámica, por eso ocupa un punto en esta reseña, claro que sí. Amé que se preocupara por Bunny y que preguntara cosas sobre la relación, a pesar de la reacción que tuvo Hannie, siento que era muy necesaria.

4- ¿La escena final? Dios, casi lloro V. Fue tan bonita que me hizo anhelar a alguien así, sinceramente. Siento que ambas relaciones son muy diferentes y eso es lo bonito de esto; que se relacionen diferente y funcionen entre sí. En conclusión, adoré este capítulo. Siempre te lo digo, pero creo que éste es el mejor capítulo de la temporada hasta ahorita. Me encanta lo que estás haciendo con estos personajes y adoro la conexión tan fuerte que parece tener el Jihan con respecto a Bunny.

Sigue así, V. Créeme que tu trabajo alegra hasta a los más tristes, lo sé porque yo ayer traía un humor horrible por lo de Hannie y me alegré en el momento que vi que habías subido capítulo, a pesar de que Tumblr no me avisó nada.

PD. Al final me hicieron el último estudio y al parecer todo fue un mal susto, pero ya estamos al 100 en ese tema. Debía comentarlo porque siento que lo dejé en el aire la vez pasada JAJA. Also, he estado llorando mucho por Hannie, pero entre más rápido se vaya, más rápido regresará.

Un placer leerte, V. Keep the amazing work.

Blossom 🌸.

moonlight | lights out series

Joshua had not only fallen in love with you, but with the life he had by your side. He just had to learn to find the balance between the life he was so in love with and the life he had worked so hard to achieve.

✮pairings: yoon jeonghan x female reader x joshua hong ✮ genre: angst, fluff, smut [18+] ✮ aus: theatre director jeonghan, rockstar joshua, polyamorous relationship ✮ word count: 25.3k

› 🎧: limbo – dpr ian | horizon – i.m | hold me – hojean | cheese and wine – dpr live | different – woodz | love scene – baekhyun | take my hand – zerobaseone ‹ note: this song is so cute and perfect | ditto – new jeans | bad sad and mad – bibi → season one — season two — read more › smut warnings under the cut

✮ warnings: sleep paralysis, smut with plot, dom jeonghan, switch joshua, switch reader, alcohol consumption, slight mlm themes, slight dubcon: reader takes care of drunk hannie. reader is on birth control, smoking, corruption kink, dirty talk, unprotected p in v sex, blowjob, handjob, deepthroating, dacryphilia, fingering, creampies, tongue fucking, pussy drunk hannie, squirting, hair pulling, doggy style, rough sex, consensual recordings of sexual intercourse, a bit of cockwarming, vanilla sex, lazy love-making, nipple teasing, couch sex, dirty talk. brat taming: pussy slaps, spanking, edging, praise/degradation kink, light impact play, 1 slap on the cheek. pet names: bunny, beautiful, baby, princess, bad girl, filthy girl (hers), handsome, big baby, (jeonghan) babe, baby, handsome (joshua) ✮ author's note: this is incredibly self indulgent. also, these chapters are getting longer... having to write about two boyfriends at the same time is not for the text-limited posts on tumblr. i'm going to start posting my fics on ao3 too soon... so be on the lookout for that? hehe ✮ author's note 2: there are some instances where the word Bunny and/or Princess are with capital letters and that is to signify Y/N, ok? ok i'm terrible at explaining this .. i just don't like using the Y/N nomenclature. i feel like it pulls me out of the reading ✮ author's note 3: also thanks to @onlymingyus who helped me figure out some scenes! thank you baby 🩵 ✮ disclaimer: minors dni this post is intended for 18+ readers. please have your age stated in your description and try not to look like a bot please 🙂.

part iv

The candles were half-burnt, still lit, and sitting on the table with a forgotten charcuterie board and two empty cups of red wine. You had not finished cleaning the table when you got sidetracked by a serious conversation with your boyfriend on the couch.

A conversation that, predictably, ended with a heavy make-out session.

Joshua had to finish packing his suitcase, a thought that he pushed far back into the list of things he needed to get ready before he left for his first tour the following day. The number one priority to him though, was you. Despite the heavy topic of conversation that you both just had, he could match the passion of your kisses quite effortlessly.

It was his last night with you for what would be weeks. He was not sure when he was coming back exactly, since this tour was going to Midnight Haze’s first big tour.

This was a huge achievement. It was something he dreamed about when his band was just a local indie one. Now they were signed. They had their first studio album. And they were going on tour to visit different countries. A dream come true.

However, there was one thing holding him back.

Joshua never thought of himself as a romantic person. Not even remotely. He used to think he was content with being on his own. He never looked for love and made it very explicit with every partner he had. No relationships, no attachments. Only one goal, and he achieved that goal.

But in his journey, he never thought he would fall in laove. He was not expecting you. When he met you and accepted your proposal to have an entirely sexual relationship, he never noticed the warnings in his brain. Joshua blindly gave himself to you.

It shook his world to find you.

He wanted to stay in the coziness of the home you had given him. And to think that you were neighbors for years before you saw and talked to each other… he wondered sometimes what would have happened if you crossed paths differently, would he be here with you?

Involuntarily, his hands gripped your waist tighter, pulling you closer on his lap. You stifled a moan in his mouth, one hand cupping his chin, while the other had slid down his chest, clinging onto to his plaid shirt.

“Babe,” you paused, but he protested with a groan, his hand sliding up to the middle of your back to keep you from pulling away from him. “Josh,” you mumbled in between desperate kisses. “You have to pack your things, don’t you?” you asked, a giggle fleeing between your lips.

You knew already that he had to finish packing, but that did not stop you from starting the make-out session. And he knew you were just trying to tease him because there he was, all riled up, becoming more and more addicted to your lips.

“I have till five in the morning,” he responded with a hoarse voice, his hand left your back to meet your cheek. “Come here.”

The hand clinging onto his shirt flattened between his pecs. “I mean, but you also have to sleep, right?”

“I can sleep on the plane.”

Joshua heard an airy chuckle leave your mouth as his hand cupping your cheek motioned you in for another deep, heated kiss. It was his turn to smile into the kiss then your hand on his chest found the first button of his shirt, slowly and almost meekly undoing it with one hand.

But you broke away, a playful grin curving your lips. “Are you sure though? I can help you pack, and then we continue where we left off?”

He shook his head slightly, getting lost in the features of your face. It was going to be a while before he saw you again like this. Even if you were planning to visit him soon, he could not last a day without holding you. He had to make the most of the time he had left with you.

“I want to be close to you tonight,” he mumbled, holding your gaze. “I can pack later.”

“I just don’t want you to be late,” you replied dismissively, because you wanted the same thing as him just as badly.

Joshua smiled in full endearment of your worry. It was not unusual for you to worry about the smallest of things. “Don’t worry, I’ll just throw a few things in there and that’s it,” he shrugged, a knowing look appearing on his face.

You hated that at once, you shook your head. “Joshua, you need to do it right,” you said in a more serious tone, chastising him a little. But when his smile widened, scrunching his nose, you just pushed his shoulder.

“I will, baby,” he reassured, nodding with his head. “But only if you keep kissing me,” he challenged.

You returned the smile. “And if I don’t?”

He shrugged. “I’ll just finish packing and go to sleep,” he said nonchalantly.

You tried holding his gaze, but then your facial features broke into a pout.

“I’m just teasing you, baby,” he giggled, his eyes turning into half moons as he tipped his head back slightly.

You loved the sound of his giggles, sweet and merry. You could not resist yourself, grabbing his face with your hands to plant a kiss on his scrunched nose, catching him off guard. But he recovered quickly, grabbing your waist again to capture your lips with his own, to continue where you left off.

Your hand returned searching for the buttons of his plaid shirt, feeling the curve of his pecs in the process as you undid each button hurriedly, his shirt parting, leaving his chest in sight. Your heartbeat fluttered at the sound of his breathing hitching, and your hands slid beneath the plaid shirt, caressing the bare skin of his chest freely.

His pectorals bulged, and it was hard not to notice them lately. You knew he had been working out consistently as of late, so when your hands cupped his pecs, he bristled.

“Sorry,” you whispered sheepishly.

“It’s okay,” he reassured with a soft smile. “You can do whatever you want to me.”

“Okay,” you breathed out.

Having the green light, your hands explored his chest beneath his shirt, the pads of your thumbs teasing his nipples lightly. You felt his thighs tensing beneath you when you rubbed his nipples gently, cupping and massaging the soft muscle of his pectorals.

Joshua sat up straight, his hands securing you firmly, so you did not lose balance. In a wordless exchange, your hands slid from his chest to his shoulders and down his arms, thus pushing the sleeves of his shirt off him.

Once he was freed from the first piece of clothing on his body, his hands were on you again. Your fingertips grazed his veiny biceps, tracing a line to his collarbones and then cupped his neck, all the while kissing him heatedly, humming slightly on his mouth every time he outlined your lower lip with the tip of his tongue.

“Can I mark you?” you asked with a breathy tone, your fingers trailing down the soft skin of his neck.

Joshua knew why you asked. As his band gained more traction and recognition, their agency had to hire a PR management company, which instructed the Haze boys to be careful with their image.

“No, baby. You can’t,” he replied with a saddened tone. He hated to say no to you. He also hated to have this pristine poster boy front that he did not care for about at all.

“Mn, okay,” you breathed, not giving him the opportunity to see your full reaction, you leaned to kiss him again.

You broke away from the kiss, but rested your forehead on his, slowly littering him with pecks. One hand left the side of his neck, and Joshua tilted his head back to pay attention to the detour your hand was taking. You tucked your hand behind your back, grabbing the lace tying the back of your dress, and unravelling it with one movement.

In a silent sequence, Joshua gathered the long fabric of your dress that you had worn for the occasion by grabbing the skirt in bundles and pulling it up your body. Your hair got ruffled in the process, and you laughed meekly as your fingers removed the strands from your face and tucked them behind your ears.

But Joshua was caught up in the fact that you had been wearing absolutely nothing beneath the dress he had just discarded on the side of the sofa. He took one look at your naked body sitting on top of him, and then his eyes met yours. “Were you wearing nothing beneath that the whole time?”

You nodded with your head meekly, biting your lower lip to hide your smile. “I thought you’d appreciate it,” you shrugged.

Even though you had been together for months now, a blush still painted your cheeks red in utter shyness. From the night he met you, he has seen you naked, due to the nature of your relationship. It was natural for him to see your shyness then, but now, after all these months, he found it endearing.

“You know I do,” he admitted as you leaned over to latch your lips with his. “You know everything you do drives me crazy,” he purred in between kisses.

His hands explored your back, circling over to clutch at the curve of your waist, knowing that would bring your body alight. You pushed your chest to him, muffling a moan in his mouth, something he returned at once when he felt your pebbled nipples on his skin. A hand pressed on your back, squeezing you to his hard body.

Your fingers found his nape, sliding to tangle on the locks of his beautiful dark hair. He dyed it recently with a dark chocolate tone, bringing back the shadow of the man you met when he used to live right next to your apartment. Your fingernails grazed his scalp, bringing out a salacious moan from him.

The sound reverberated against your chest, sending a chill that ran thick through your body. It only egged you on, your fingers trailed down from his nape to his neck, caressing his skin ever so gently.

The delicate touches left tingling sensations in their wake, slowly driving Joshua crazy. His hands clenched the curve of your waist one more time before finding your ass, cupping it with a raspy groan from his part.

You pulled away from his lips with a rich smacking noise. “Not so fast,” you mumbled with a tilt of your head. A confused look shot through the features of his face, making you clarify: “Not until I get your clothes off.”

Joshua understood where you were going right away. His dark, glinting eyes marvelled at the sight of you, face still flushed, naked and on top of him. He nodded, letting you take his wrists and driving his large hands from your ass to your thighs, where they rested instead.

You grabbed his chin with your fingers daintily, leaning over to place a small peck on his lips. “Good boy,” you whispered. “Now let me get you out of those jeans.”

Completely enamored, he just nodded, heart fluttering uneasily in his chest when you flashed him a cute smile. You placed another kiss on the corner of his lips, fingers pinching his chin softly before you carried on with your task.

You raked his torso with the tips of your fingers, making him draw in a breath sharply at the sensation. “I like you so much,” you mumbled with an airy tone, looking at his figure, the curve of his strong shoulders and biceps.

In your admiring his body, you were not aware of his eyes doing the same thing, outlining every inch, every curve of your body on top of his. “You’re so hot,” you added almost aloofly.

“Ditto,” he mumbled, recalling the times you have exchanged a similar expression. He squeezed your thighs gently, bringing your gaze to meet his. There, in his eyes, you saw the love and adoration he felt for you.

You did not resist the urge to kiss him, so you did exactly that by closing the space between your lips.

“You’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen,” he mumbled sweetly, the statement bringing a light chuckle out of you, so he emphasized: “The hottest. I fell for you instantly.”

“Did you?” you smiled.

“Absolutely,” he whispered. “All grumpy at me in your bunny pjs,” he enjoyed the meek smile appearing on your face. “The prettiest… and the hottest.”

You rolled your eyes, but the smile did not disappear. “Shut up,” you mouthed, the aloofness persisted as you ran your hands on his chest, feeling his pecs up. Then he understood that you were entranced, your eyes lost on his nakedness.

“Make me,” he whispered, a knowing smirk spreading on his beautiful lips.

Your smile turned playful, giving him a chaste kiss. “Bad boy,” you whispered, propping yourself on your knees to scoot back a little and then he felt the tips of your fingers on his lower abdomen, making him draw in another breath.

He looked at your fingers tracing a line over the soft hairs of his happy trail, meeting the band of his boxers peeking beneath his jeans. Then he darted a look at your face, finding out that you were biting your lower lip in excitement and anticipation. Your eyes locked with his briefly, the corners of your lips lifting a little right before you tugged at the button of his jeans free.

Joshua smiled slightly when you gave him a rushed, feathery kiss. “Help me?” you whispered, climbing off him and the couch while hooking your fingers on the band of his boxers. He lifted his hips from his seat, as you pulled both his jeans and boxers down his thighs and got rid of them completely.

But instead of climbing back on top of him, you eased down on your knees between his legs. Joshua noticed your eyes widen slightly as you outlined his body, your hands caressing his meaty thighs. He leaned back on the couch, so his head was resting back as he watched you explore his body with your eyes, with your hands.

Joshua was a beautiful man. As you took in the sheer beauty of his body, bathed by the soft orange glow of the lights, you felt lucky of being his partner.

You caressed his thighs with your hands, as he cupped one of your cheeks, making your eyes fall on his bulging biceps and his well toned pecs, the curve that formed beneath them. A half smile tugged his lips when you licked yours.

You held his gaze for a moment, a fluttering sensation invading you in your tummy. Joshua was ready for you, the features of his face relaxing slightly when your hand circled his shaft. You touched him at first, his soft and veiny skin, pumping him gently from the base of his cock to the head slick with precum.

You spread the precum with the palm of your hand all over his cockhead before moving your fist up and down, enjoying the way his gaze darkened, his mouth parted slightly. His lust-filled eyes were trained on you as you leaned down, pressing your lips on the tip of his cock, kissing him playfully.

Joshua smiled lightly at the sight of you, using his fingers to push your hair away from your face. But the smile faded, just as you took his cockhead inside your mouth, licking his precum, humming slightly in delightfulness at the taste of him.

He released a small grunt through his parted rosy lips, you took him deeper inside your mouth, your hand moving to his base to pump him with gentle strokes at first. You bobbed your head slowly, eyes locked on his face to see him responding to you just how you expected.

Joshua closed his eyes, closing his mouth to breathe in slowly. His hand slid from your cheek to the side of your head to thread his fingers through your hair, following the movements of your head on his cock. “Faster… please, baby,” he mumbled faintly.

You followed suit, picking up the pace. You hollowed out your cheeks as you pulled your mouth up to his cockhead, swirling your tongue on his tip. His body tensed on the couch, his nose scrunching as he groaned, gritting his teeth. “Fuck… yes,” he sighed. “Just like that.”

A fluttering sensation invaded you, chest swelling with pride when you heard his raspy, deep grunts escaping him. His fingers coiled around your hair, and his other hand joined on the other side of your head, helping you move on him as you took him in deeper.

Silence had flooded the room, only interrupted by soft, smacking noises and the deep grunts from Joshua. Occasionally, he would cuss under his breath, but his face remained relaxed, lost in the sight of you taking his cock in your mouth expertly.

Joshua loved watching you like this, he loved that you knew every step to drive him absolutely crazy. It was taking everything in him to stop his hips to thrust forward. However, you read his movements, pausing before attempting to take him ever deeper into your mouth, gagging around him as his cockhead reached your throat.

“Careful, baby,” he cautioned, retaking the control. You followed, pausing for breath before you tried to deepthroat him again. He saw your eyes start to water, and his thumb reached to scoop a tear rolling down your cheek.

It was your eagerness to take him whole what made him tip his head back, his throat bobbing as he swallowed a deep moan. “Fuck,” he breathed, feeling the muscles of your mouth relax and contract around his cock. “You’re taking me so well, baby.”

Your movements slowed down slightly and became smaller now that his cockhead reached your throat, you retreated your head slightly and pushed again, drool dripping down his shaft and onto your fist. You kept pumping him, though languidly, all your focus was on your mouth on his cock.

“Oh god,” he moaned, opening his eyes to the sight of you deepthroating him, sucking him whole. “Fuck, I’m coming,” he rasped.  

But then you stopped, carefully pulling your head back. But the change made your eyes water, you coughed a little, breathing through your nose.

His mouth hung open, frowning in confusion. “Why did you stop?” he asked, watching you wipe the drool from your lips with the back of your hand.

You grinned, climbing back on top of him to place a chaste kiss on his lips. “You’re coming when I want you to,” you mumbled sweetly, booping the tip of his nose with your finger.

“Baby,” he rasped chidingly, elongating the final vowel of his protest. But his large hands welcomed you, grabbing your hips as you straddled him.

You giggled, kissing his protruding lower lip as he pouted at you. “You’re cute,” you teased.

His studded eyebrow jumped slightly; you should have known better than playing with him like this. “You think so?”

You nodded with your head, a satisfying look glinting in your eyes. “The cutest baby boy,” you purred, bringing a hand on his nape before kissing him. Your other hand searched for his throbbing cock, blindly guiding it to your sopping wet pussy.

A deep moan vibrated in your mouth when you sank down on him, pausing yet again but now to savor the slight painful but delicious stretch of his cock in your walls. Joshua groaned, dropping his head on the headrest of the couch, his hands kneading on your thighs as if that helped him resist his orgasm.

“Look at you,” you cooed softly. “You look so good like this,” you added, toeing between mocking him and appreciating the sweet features of his face riddled by pleasure.

Joshua gulped hard. His gaze, darkened by lust outlined the features of your face as you rolled your hips on his cock. He could not lie, he loved when you took control, he loved to see you grow confident on top of him.

But with one, sudden movement, he thrusted you onto the cushions of the couch. The non-existent heed for your body made you yelp in surprise. He propped himself on his knees, grabbing the back of yours to press your thighs onto your chest.

“Joshua–,” you tried protesting, your face broken in utter confusion when in seconds, he had torn through your dominance like ripping through a piece of paper.

You braced yourself before it happened. Joshua brought down his hand on your exposed cunt, slapping it firmly. Both excitement and pain shot through your body, making you cry out a loud moan that sounded lewder than anything.

Joshua heard the rawness in your moan and understood right away that you had liked it. He tilted his head to one side, smirking as he asked: “Want more?”

You nodded, a glazed look in your eyes before you closed them briefly. Joshua brought his hand down again, right on your sensitive clit, noticing your arousal smeared on the pads of his fingers. He pushed his fingers between your wet folds, to rub circles on your swollen nub.

You flinched when his hand slapped your cunt, but the sound coming out of your mouth did not convey pain. Your face scrunched up in pleasure, your eyebrows knitted, and glossy lips puckered. “More.”

Joshua stopped rubbing your clit with his fingers, raising his hand once more to bring it down with a harsher slap, enjoying the whiny sound tearing through you. He continued to rub your cunt, getting unbearably harder when he noticed the arousal pooling in your entrance. “Filthy girl,” he whispered, a smirk playing in his lips.

“More,” you demanded, your tone dropping to a question.

But Joshua had removed his hand from your throbbing pussy, his fingers encircling around his shaft, pumping it to smear your wetness all over himself. “You’ll take what I give you.”

He then placed a hand on the arm rest above your head, lowering himself on your body as his hand grabbing his hard cock drove it to your entrance, easing himself inside you in one go, filling you up to the point of bringing you to tears.

An airy moan escaped you, and it was not only because his weight was on top of your legs, crushing your chest almost. It was also feeling his girthy cock stretching your pussy, reaching a spot inside you that had your walls clenching around him.

“F-fuck,” you gritted, pushing your head back onto the cushions of the couch. “Joshua,” you whimpered, grabbing his shoulder with one hand. “S-so deep.”

Tears spilled when you blinked, bringing out a wolfish grin from him. “Who’s cute now,” he purred, starting to slam his hips against you with a fast, near animalistic pace. As much as he loved seeing you try your hand at domming him, he loved even more to be the one in charge.

The depth of his hard thrusts became addictive, like fire consuming you rapidly. You writhed beneath him; the tip of his cock reaching a glorious spot inside you every time he slammed his hips against yours.

“Oh god, Josh…” you said between deep breaths. “I’m coming.”

Joshua smiled like this was a game that he just won. But he nodded, kissing the inner side of your knee. He revelled at the sight of you like this: you were crying, stirring, and whining loudly as your orgasm washed over you, making your walls clamp erratically around his cock.

But he kept thrusting inside you, loving the wet sounds that came from your pussy, the way your moans turned airy and raspy. Your eyes had rolled back, your mouth fell open, and he committed to memorize that image of you.

“Joshua… Joshua…” you whimpered, over and over until you were completely breathless.

He eased one of your legs from your chest, wordlessly commanding you to wrap it around his waist, lowering his hips on you, burying his cock deep inside you again. You moaned languidly; eyes closed as you savored the gentle aftershocks of your orgasm.

Joshua was lost in you. In the midst of it all, the faint reminder that this was your last night together in some weeks made his heart clench. He leaned his head down to press his lips on your forehead, the tip of your nose and your lips.

“I love you,” he whispered, unable to bring his voice any louder.

You hummed in response, opening your eyes to see his face. “I love you, Joshua,” you responded, cupping his cheek with one hand to kiss him deeply.

Joshua rested his forehead on yours, sliding a hand under your nape, his fingers tangling in your hair. He retook the brutal pace of his thrusts, feeling your mouth fall open and he blindly mimicked you. Now you were breathing on each other’s mouths, moaning in unison.

Your hands circled his back, holding onto him for dear life as his thrusts knocked the air out of your lungs. “Baby, don’t,” Joshua rasped when your fingernails started digging on the soft skin of his back, bringing out a raw moan from him. “Oh, you fucking brat,” he groaned in both pain and pleasure as you dragged your fingernails down his back, piercing his skin.

You giggled impishly, and he responded with a grin. You removed a hand from his back, cupping his cheek to pull him into a hot, sloppy kiss. He groaned in your mouth, egging you to kiss the underside of his jaw, the curve of his neck, his throat.

“Fuck,” he whispered when you suckled the sensitive spot on his neck you liked so much. But he did not protest or stop your rebellious marking of his neck and back.

You brought his lips back to yours, kissing him chastely. “A little reminder,” you whispered. “So that everyone knows you’re mine,” you traced a circle with the tip of your finger around the marked spot on his neck.

Joshua moaned, pushing his hips desperately against you. “Leave more,” he gasped. “Mark me,” he whispered out his plea to you, turning his head so you could have an easy access to his neck.

The thought of you being possessive over him drove him crazy, pushing him to lose control on top of you. He rolled his hips against you, moaning salaciously as you marked him up from his collarbone to his throat.

“Fuck, baby. Ah. God, fuck,” he squeezed his eyes, scrunching his nose as his thrusts became sloppy. “I’m coming,” he whispered, dropping his head on your shoulder. He moaned repeatedly, fucking his cum deep into your walls.

He pressed his body on yours gently. You wrapped your legs around him as you both regained energies, enjoying each other’s warmth.

You brought a hand to caress his nape, your fingers threading gently his hair. His face was still nuzzled in the curve of your neck, breathing raggedly on your skin. Then he moved his head and rested it on your chest, humming tiredly but relishing in the gentleness of your touch.

Your hand slid from his nape, now caressing gently over the scratch marks you left. A lazy smile drew on your face when you ran your fingertips over the bumpy lines along the line of his back.

Joshua heard you smile, lifting his head to press your lips with his own in a tender way. “Bad girl,” he whispered playfully. “You’re gonna get me in trouble.”

You arched an eyebrow. “Oh, yeah? I didn’t see a lot of resistance from your part,” you teased.

“How could I resist? You have a very effective method of persuasion,” he smirked, nose wrinkling when you chuckled.

“Do I now? Since when?” 

“Since forever,” he rolled his eyes, laughing at the way your voice raised higher. “And you’ve known it since day one.”

“Mm, I don’t think I did,” you mumbled with a sing-song tone. You did that whenever you flirted with him.

Joshua gave you a sweet smile, one of those that melted your heart. “No? Well, you’ve had me wrapped around your finger ever since.”

Your face took on a more serious look, your gaze fell on his lips. You wished to make this moment longer, to postpone his departure. A dark part inside you, one dominated by greed, wanted to ask him to stay with you.

“I love you,” you whispered, searching his eyes again. You tried to convey with those simple words that you were going to miss him, that you wanted to stay with him in this moment forever.

Joshua read your face, noticing that your mood had dropped a little. “I love you,” he replied, thinking of what to say.

And then, a loud knock came to the door.

You jerked in alarm beneath him, drawing in a sharp breath. “Oh god,” you whispered, stretching your neck to look at the door.

But Joshua did not move.

“Josh, someone’s at the door,” you whispered, your body recoiling again when the knock became louder.

“Pretend we’re not in,” he mumbled, nestling his head on your shoulder again.

You turned to look at him in utter disbelief. “Babe,” you tried to move him with one hand. “Move so that I can see who is knocking.”

“But we’re not in,” he did not move an inch.

But whoever was at the other side of the door was not quitting either, knocking once more with urgency.

Joshua groaned in complete annoyance, pushing his body up with his hands, peeling himself off you. “Wait here,” he commanded, a hand reaching for the blanket on the arm rest and draping it over your body.

You watched him curiously as he put on his boxers and walked up to the door, yanking it open and peering out to the hall. Holding the blanket to your chest, you propped your elbow on the cushions of the couch, trying to get what was happening on the exchange.

Joshua appeared to nod his head, stepping closer to the doorframe as if to cover the interior to the apartment to the eyes of whoever was standing in front of him. He nodded once more, lifting a hand to receive something and closed the door with a sharp move.

He rolled his eyes, exhaling softly as he discarded a piece of paper on the table, walking back to you.

“Who was that?” you asked upon seeing his face scrunched up in annoyance.

“We just got a noise complaint,” he announced. “Another one.”

Your heart dropped. “Why?” you demanded, trying to sit up on the couch but you stopped yourself with a horrified expression: “We can’t have more than two, we’ll get an eviction notice.”

“I know, I know,” he muttered softly, sitting next to you on the edge of the couch. “Relax, baby. We could look for another apartment somewhere else,” he shrugged with ease, but you could tell he was still annoyed.

You gaped at him. “What?” you uttered.

“By the looks of it, they want us out of here,” he explained solemnly.

“Why do you say that?”

“They had a noise complaint printed and ready to deliver it,” he exhaled, pushing his hair back with one hand. “Seems like they were waiting for the perfect moment to do it.”

You eased back, sighing with him. “God,” you frowned. “Well, I don’t like that. We weren’t being loud!”

Joshua arched one eyebrow at your protest.

“Not like other times,” you mumbled sheepishly, but your eyes wandered into the nothingness. Your mind had started to fly through all the possible routes of action.

“Hey,” he mumbled, yanking you away from your thoughts. “It’s okay. We could start looking for an even nicer place, with bigger rooms…” he said, his tone fading off.

“Mmn, yeah,” you replied, not noticing that he had thought of something else.

But he recovered swiftly, patting your tummy gently. “Let’s not think about it right now, yeah?” he suggested, giving you a soft smile. “Let me take care of you.”

He rose to his feet, pushing the blanket off and with great ease, he scooped you from the couch, carrying you in his arms bridal style. You squealed in surprise, but you welcomed the nice act, smiling at him softly.

In the shower, he noticed your dreamy eyes on him. “I wonder,” you asked, bringing a finger to connect the marked spots on his neck and collarbones.

“What?” he asked, finishing to rinse the shampoo from his deep brown hair.

“What your fans might will say about these,” you mumbled, finishing the trail of connected lovebites, the last one sitting bellow his collarbone.

“There’s already a lot of speculation,” he said, grabbing your finger from his chest to kiss the pad.

“Oh? What is it about?”

Joshua shrugged with ease. “It’s mostly a debate between people that think that I have a partner and people that think that I’m a serial fuckboy.”

You snorted at the last bit of the sentence.

“Is that funny?” his studded eyebrow twitched slightly.

“A little,” you mumbled, slipping your arms around his neck. “Serial fuckboy,” you teased with a grin. “If they only knew.”

He rolled his eyes at your teasing. He closed the water tap, being so that you both had finished cleaning up. His hands circled your waist, keeping a hand flatly pressed on your lower back. “They’ll go crazy with their speculations when they see these,” he pointed with his nose to his chest.

“That just comes with the job, right?” you mused, looking at him almost dazedly.

He leaned his face to yours, water dripping down his forehead and the tip of his nose. “I just don’t want them to snoop on what we have together,” he shrugged lightly.

“What if that happens?” you asked on a more serious tone.

His beautiful dark eyes read your face intently, but he just shook his head lightly, placing a kiss on your forehead. “It won’t happen,” he said, his tone lace with promise.

Then he removed his arms from your body, reaching behind you to grab your bathrobe, offering it to you. “You’re pretty sure of that,” you observed as he helped you put the robe on.

“What are you thinking? Do you want to plan?” he offered, darting a look to your face.

You could tell that the topic of conversation made him uncomfortable. He didn't like the idea of the world knowing about you and, quite possibly, ruining your writing career, in which anonymity was a major part.

“I just think that I want to be ready if they find out about our relationship,” you said nonchalantly, exiting the shower and went ahead to towel dry your hair. “If it comes to it, we can handle it. Who knows, maybe it won’t be that bad,” you suggested offhandedly, walking out of the bathroom.

Joshua followed you to the bedroom after wiping himself with his towel. “Wait, you’re not worried about your anonymity?”

“I don’t know, Josh,” you sighed, sitting down on the foot of the bed. You clasped your hands on your towel, pausing pensively. “I think that it’s best if we’re prepared.”

Joshua walked up to you slowly, making your eyes swivel from the wall of the room to meet his gaze. “Why don’t we leave the plans for another night, mn?” he suggested, bringing a hand to your cheek, cupping it briefly.

You nodded, taking in a deep breath. “Alright,” you said.

He pulled a pair of clean boxers up to his waist and turn around to continue packing his bags. You noticed he did this in a near mechanical way, by grabbing the clothes that were already folded from the closet. You drew your legs in and hugged them as you continued to see him finish packing the first of his suitcases.

As Joshua turned to continue with his task, it was then when you noticed his back, red with the marks you left with your fingernails, some of the scratches looked thicker than others. “Oh my god, I marked you up so bad,” you giggled shamefully, bringing a hand to cover your face.

Joshua gave you a confused look, but then he understood. “Is it that bad?” he walked over to the full body mirror you had on one corner of the bedroom, turning to peek to his marked up back.

His eyes fell on you, sitting cross-legged on the bed, one hand covering your face in complete shame. “I’m sorry,” you mumbled.

“It’s not bad, baby,” he decided, turning around to take a few steps toward the foot of the bed where you still sat.

He planted a knee on the edge of the bed, followed by his hands at the same time you laid back, moving your legs for him to slot his body between them.

“I kind of like it,” he said, pressing his lips on the tip of your nose. “I like it when you act all possessive over me,” he smirked. “And I remembered that you have a thing for pain during sex.”

You let out a muffled sigh. “Josh! I don’t think I do,” you countered, but your tone sounded so insecure that it had you smiling shamefully.

“Mn, you bratty little thing, did you like to inflict pain on me?” he purred, enjoying the flustered look on your face. He did not wait for your answer, because he already knew it. “If it makes you feel better, I liked it too.”

“Why don’t we do it more often?” you pried, sneaking a look at his eyes that had your tummy clenching in nervousness.

Joshua had to pause for a second to gather his thoughts. “It’s not the thing that I’m more inclined to do,” he said pensively, his eyelids hooded to look at your face. “And also, I still don’t know how far I can take you.”

“Well then we should try it one day and see,” you offered him a meek smile.

“If you want to, baby,” he whispered, planting a light kiss on the tip of your nose. “Let’s add it to the list.”

Okay, you breathed, noticing the heavy-lidded eyes starting to look drowsy, even his speech had started to become slow and slurry. “Let’s go to bed?” you offered.

Joshua nodded his head slowly. “Let’s go to bed,” he accepted.

You moved on the bed until you reached the fluffy pillows. Scurrying beneath the covers you patiently waited for your boyfriend to occupy his space in your bed. You watched him get beneath the bed sheets beside you, a soft smile drawing on his face when you scooted to him at once.

You had four hours until he had to go to the airport. You saw his phone screen lit up, showing the picture he had of you as his wallpaper. He made no note of your eyes shifting from his phone to his face, he was deep in thought.

“Nervous?” you whispered.

He nodded again, much as if it were sinking within him that these were his last hours of normalcy before he was launched back into the wild-paced life that is being a rockstar.

“You’re going to do great, baby,” you said with a reassuring tone. “I’ll be here cheering you on, watching you.”

A warm feeling poured over his heart. “Once I learn when I have a break, I’ll come see you,” he promised, the feeling in his heart making his tone quiver. “Or I’ll fly you in wherever I’m at.”

Joshua hated how repetitive he sounded. He said this right before he left for his first tour. And you wondered, inevitably, if this time would be different.

“Take things easy,” you mumbled, your speech had started to sound languid too, dragging the words. “I don’t want you to stress yourself over things you can’t control, Joshua. And those you can, take them one at a time.”

Your boyfriend had to pause and let your words take form inside his mind. When he knew what you meant, he nodded. “I’m trying,” he said faintly. He knew you meant well. He did. But he could not help but feel a deep wave of shame wash over him. “I’m trying to get better at this.”

Your eyes dropped. “I know, babe, that’s not what I meant,” you tried to justify, but it was too late. “I–I just mean–I don’t want you to stress yourself too much.” 

He pushed the feeling deep down and nodded. “I won’t, baby. Don’t worry,” he breathed out the words. He shifted under the covers and onto his back. “Come over here,” he motioned you to his chest, and you lied your head on his heart.

You felt his hand searched for yours, and you instinctively held his fingers. He brought your hand to his lips, kissing the tips of your fingers one by one to then kiss your knuckles.

You raised your head a little, planting a kiss on his cheek. “I love you,” you mumbled, drawing his gaze from the darkness to yours.

“I love you,” he mumbled back, pressing your lips with a featherlight kiss. “So much,” he emphasized.

It broke your heart to hold back your true feelings about him leaving. Joshua already looked sad. As though he were mere minutes to leave, not hours. You lied back on his chest, his heartbeat strumming under your ear, bringing you to a quick sleep without you even knowing.

Joshua did not want to leave either. And that thought he carried onto his dreams.

His sleep was interrupted abruptly. A tight feeling trying to choke him was what drove him to snap his eyes open. As his mind gained some lucidity, the bits and pieces of his dream stung his eyes, the tight feeling coiling in his chest giving way to a broken sob.

“Joshua?” you raised your head right away, bringing a hand to touch his cheek. “What’s wrong? Babe?”

It took him some time to realize that he could not move, fear set in instantly, but he held onto the touch of your hands, and the sound of your voice calling his name. First, he blinked the tears away, letting them go unwillingly but his eyes found you, then his hands.

“Joshua, answer me,” he heard you plead, the worry in your tone palpable.

“I’m okay,” he rasped, gulping hard before reassuring, more to himself than to you: “I’m okay.”

“Tell me what’s going on,” you said, not buying his words.

Joshua frowned before he could even understand what you were demanding. He closed his eyes briefly, his eyelids trembled over the tears that threatened to brim in. Fragments of what he saw last flooded his mind and he shook his head, remembering nothing.

“I think it was just a bad dream, baby,” he reassured. But the broken feeling in his chest persisted.

Your thumb caressed his cheek. “You can talk to me,” you mumbled, and when his eyes found your face again, he saw the worry he had heard in your tone.

“I don’t remember anything,” he swore, and he saw your eyes dim. “Let’s go back to sleep.”

You nodded, placing your head back on his chest. Your hand lowered from his cheek, caressing his bare chest.

Joshua heard you release a sigh, and then your body eased back on top of him. The caress of your hand ceased slowly, and then he knew that you had fallen asleep again.

It would not be long before he came back. He would go away from some weeks, then he would come back and leave again; he would have opportunities to come back home to you. To sleeping next to you. Being with you.

But the prospect of not having this frightened him. Joshua had not only fallen in love with you, but with the tiny, quiet life he had by your side. He just had to learn to find the balance between this life he was so in love with and the life he had worked so hard to achieve.

Joshua woke up again to the sound of his alarm, jolting at the frantic stammering of his heart, his fist instinct was to reach for his phone and shut the beeping alarm off.

His arms encircled you again, it seemed as though you had not changed positions, your head was still lying on his chest. You inhaled deeply, breathing in the scent of his skin, humming sweetly as his hand found a way beneath your t-shirt, caressing your back.

Not a word was spoken. But there was an unmistakable feeling lingering in the air that you both tried to push away. Joshua met your cheek with his hand, at the same time that you craned your neck to find his lips with your own.

You brushed his hair back with your hand, a low moan coiling in the back of your throat when he wrapped you with one arm, effortlessly pulling your body on top so your front was fully flushed with his.

His hand moved from your cheek to meet the curve of your waist, sliding down to grip your hips from both sides while you moved your knees on each of his sides, straddling him. Your hands cupped his beautiful face, deepening the slow and sloppy kiss.

Both of you hummed at the same time, Joshua’s low, raspy tone only caused you to sit harder on his lower tummy. His hands helped you move down on him, now pressing your crotch to his, swallowing a moan as your tongue outlined his lower lip.

“Josh, we don’t have time for this,” you whispered, a tiny giggle making your words quiver. “We’ll be late.”

“I don’t care,” he responded gruffly, his hand was already searching for your panties, pushing them aside with one finger as you lifted your hips.

Your hand pushed his boxers down, grabbing his cock by the thick shaft. You rolled your hand once, pumping him a couple of times before easing yourself down on him. A strangled moan came out of you once you bottomed out on him.

“Alright?” he whispered, hearing your groan, and recognizing that it was not entirely from pleasure.

“It’s okay,” you replied, bending over to rest your forehead on his. “I’m just a bit sore from last night, that’s all.”

“We can stop,” he offered, his hands tightening their grip on your hips.

You shook your head. “Just give me a minute,” you mumbled shakily.

Joshua nodded slightly. “Kiss me,” he whispered, moving his hand from your hip to your cheek, bringing your lips to his own.

He moaned as your walls tensed and loosened around his cock, your warmth covering him down to his hilt as your arousal started to drip down. Just to feel him hard and buried deep inside you turned you on so badly you kissed him harder, making him moan.

“You don’t have to move,” he rasped when he felt your hips swaying up and down. “We can stay like this.”

“I want to feel you,” you responded quietly, rolling your hips with a fuller motion. You joined your lips with his, slowly deepening the kiss.

Joshua moaned, letting himself be swallowed by your warmth and love, trying to memorize to heart what it feels like being yours. To be loved by you. He closed his eyes tightly, breathing out the euphoric feeling gripping him wholly.

You pulled back for air, your lips making a soft smacking noise when you broke the kiss. “I love you, Joshua,” you breathed, burying your fingers in his mane of dark hair.

“I love you too,” he responded, his voice thickening with emotion. “You can’t imagine how much.”

Even though it was early in the morning, the airport was busy. As you climbed out of the car, you noticed Joshua’s anxiety kicking in. The posture of his body changed, and his gaze seemed to darken, and it was not only because of the hairs of his fringe tangling with his eyelashes. It was the way he looked around, probably making sure that the coast was clear.

Joshua did this lately. After he made sure that no one had known of his whereabouts, he extended a hand for you to hold. And when you did, he laced his long fingers with yours, pulling you closer as though he did not want you to get caught in the sea of people.

“Do you see Hannie?” he asked quietly beside you, adjusting the mask covering his mouth and squaring his shoulders to shift the backpack hanging on his shoulders.

You shook your head no. In fact, you had not started looking for him until your boyfriend suggested the idea for you.

Finding Jeonghan was quick. And easy. “There,” you squeezed Joshua’s hand with yours and nodded to the man perched on a massage chair.

Jeonghan’s head was lolling to one side languidly, his chest and shoulders shaking as the massage chair worked on his back. Joshua spotted the man as soon as you pointed and changed courses to meet up to him.

“Hey,” Joshua gently budged his shoulder, freeing the handle of his suitcase to do so.

Jeonghan opened his eyes, raising his head to peer under his baseball cap. “Oh, Joshuji,” he giggled awkwardly when his voice vibrated too. “There you are, you two. You’re late.”

“Yeah, you don’t say,” Joshua mumbled dismissively. “Let’s go, Hannie,” he urged the man, budging him another time but firmer, chuckling as he did so.

“Can’t you wait until this thing finishes?” he nagged, but then surrendered quickly when Joshua used his hand again to slap his shoulder. “Ah! Fine, okay,” he sighed, rising to his feet in front of you. “Hi, baby,” he muttered warmly.

“Hi, Jeongjeong,” you smiled at him, seeing his face made your tummy flutter uneasily. His eyes found yours, right before he planted a peck on your lips. His hand brushed your arm gently before he placed one peck on the tip of your nose.

The fluttering feeling intensified, making your breathing ragged. Your eyes shifted to your surroundings, thinking that people would find it weird that you were kissing one man while holding the hand of another man.

But you found out that no one was paying attention to you.

“Come on,” Joshua squeezed your hand gently.

“Okay,” Jeonghan conceded, following you when Joshua pulled you to his direction as he strode to do check his bags. Where you stayed back with Jeonghan as you both waited for Joshua.

“You’re okay, princess?” Jeonghan asked quietly, standing with his arms crossed and closely behind you.

You turned to see his eyes, partly covered by his cap. “Yeah, I’m okay,” you replied flatly, but your lie was made obvious by the way you quickly yanked your gaze from his face. “You know,” you sighed. “I don’t want to say goodbye.”

“Well, it’ll just be a few weeks,” he said in a consoling tone. “And we are going to visit him, we’ll watch him play for the biggest venues, it’ll be fine.”

You searched his eyes one more time. The confidence and reassurance he offered you never failed to do their work.

And he also never failed to read you perfectly well. “It’s not that what’s got you anxious, is it?” he mumbled with a lower tone.

You swallowed your words.

“What happened to trusting him?” he mused, the slightest of smirks playing on his lips. “When did that fly out the window?”

“I’m just overthinking,” you brushed off, sending a glance towards your boyfriend and felt guilty. “I didn’t like doing long distance the first time he went away.”

Jeonghan rolled his eyes. “Again, baby. It’ll be just a few weeks,” he leaned his head to his shoulder, looking at you with gentle eyes. “Don’t be afraid. Let’s just trust him, okay?”

Joshua was walking back to you and Jeonghan, you knew by the look on his face that he needed to go. “The boys are at the gates already,” he mentioned, sighing with heavy reluctance, and looked to you. ��I have to go now.”

You nodded, but you could not stop the remorse gripping your heart. “Yeah, okay,” you forced out.

Joshua scanned the features of your face briefly before turning to Jeonghan. They exchanged a meaningful look, making you wish for the nth time to tap into the wavelength they jealously kept to themselves. But you kept your eyes on them as Joshua extended a hand for Jeonghan to clasp firmly.

Joshua pulled him into a hug. “Ah, okay,” Jeonghan muttered with an air of awkwardness, being caught by surprise. “I’ll miss you too, Joshuji,” he coughed up a chuckle.

“Take care, Jeonghannie,” Joshua brought up his hand to pat on his best friend’s head, and something told you this used to be a normal exchange between them.

“Yeah, you too,” Jeonghan darted a look to your face. “Keep in touch, yeah? Don’t be a stranger.”

It was then that you felt some semblance of reassurance. You could feel your own distractions dissipating as soon as you saw the two men you love hugging each other. Joshua was trying to change, so you had to let go of your fears too.

“Course,” Joshua muttered as he stepped back, a weary look in his eyes as these searched you one more time.

You reached out to him just as his arms wrapped you in, once your chest was tightly pressed against his, you let out a tiny sob.

“No, baby, don’t cry, please,” he muttered, turning his face so he could press a kiss on the crown of your head.

You took a big gulp of air to calm your sobs. “I’ll miss you, Josh,” you told him, tightening your arms around his torso.

“I’ll miss you too, baby,” he replied with a strained voice. As soon as he heard your sobs, the sharp feeling returned to grip his heart. “I’ll call you. Every day.”

“Please,” you whispered shakily, moving your face to meet his.

The feeling coiled around his heart tighter when he saw your teary eyes, but you kept yourself steady and strong as you locked eyes with him. Your plea to him was clear, and he nodded to you.

“I promise,” he whispered back, leaning down to press his lips in your forehead.

You grabbed his face with your hands, giving him a quick kiss. “I love you,” you mumbled meekly.

Joshua sighed, smiling at the shyness you displayed. “Kiss me properly,” he giggled into your mouth before slotting his lips between yours.

A warm tingling feeling invaded you, lingering beneath your hot cheeks. The kiss deepened, and even if you were aware of Jeonghan’s eyes on both you and Joshua, you let yourself ease into the kiss, moving your lips on his in a seamless dance.

“I love you,” he mumbled with a sweet smile, leaning to press a kiss on the tip of your nose.

And with that, Joshua released you from his embrace, patting Jeonghan’s shoulder right before turning to walk towards the gates, where he joined the mass of people and eventually disappeared.

Joshua was gone again.

The ride back home was a strong reminiscent of the first time Joshua left on tour.

The sun was rising, the wet pavement was shimmering with the sunlight and from the rain that washed overnight. The windows of the car were covered with a light layer of mist, you rubbed your hands together, trying to warm them up a little.

You lifted one finger and drew a smiley face on the car window.

“Oi,” Jeonghan jolted you awake. “No drawing on the windows!” he berated you playfully.

You added some rays around the face, turning it into a smiley sun.

“Ah, you little…” he giggled, sliding a hand on your thigh. “So, have you decided what you want for breakfast?”

You shook your head, gaze falling on Jeonghan’s hand parked on your thigh. “I just want to go home.”

“Okay, home it is then,” he mumbled sweetly.

You paused for a second. “I do want blueberry muffins, though.”

“Ah, alright,” he giggled, patting your thigh gently. “Let’s go get muffins, baby.”

You knew that Jeonghan had commenced his plan to distract you from the emptiness of going back to an empty apartment. When you got there, and saw the table cluttered with the stuff from the dinner of the night before, it was not as painful as you thought it would be.

Jeonghan kept quiet at first, helping you remove the cups of wine and taking them to the sink. The glances he sent to check on you continued until he decided you were alright, that your silence was not because you felt sad, and although you did, it was merely because you were going to miss Joshua.

“Do you want coffee?” Jeonghan, his soft voice breaking through the barriers of your mind.

“I’d love that,” you replied, offering him a reassuring smile.

You followed him to the kitchen, putting the rest of the plates in the sink. “Leave that there,” Jeonghan muttered as you reached for the scrub. “I’ll do the dishes.”

“You don’t have to, Hannie,” you said, noticing that he was trying to accommodate to your gloomy mood and do nice things for you.

“But I want to,” he shrugged, but then you saw a light smirk lifting the corners of his pretty lips. “You do the breakfast, though. It’s your turn,” he said, finishing with a broader smile.

“Pff, okay,” you huffed, a smile appearing on your face.

Jeonghan’s eyes lit up, outlining the features of your face swiftly. “And then maybe we could watch a movie,” he offered, trying to hold your gaze for as long as he could. “But then I have to go to work.”

You raised your eyes to his. And he noticed the question written in your face.

“Wanna come with?”

You nodded with your head silently.

“Okay, then,” he breathed in, pressing the button on the coffee maker on. Then he busied himself with doing the dishes, swiftly looking your way as you prepared two omelettes.

A shy smile crept on your face, being scrutinized by his sweet brown eyes just made you feel uneasy. Jeonghan noticed, moving to stand behind you so you would not feel his gaze on you, but then he did matters worse. His arms encircled your waist, hugging you from behind, his chest pressed to your back.

“What?” he asked when you lowered your head, smiling when he pressed a kiss on your shoulder.

“Nothing,” you mumbled, squirming slightly when his breath fanned your nape. “You make me nervous.”

“Why?” he whispered, he looked at your eyes, then your lips.

“I like you,” you replied in kind. You thought it was obvious.

The way his eyes lit up made your stomach flutter with butterflies. “I like you more, princess,” he said, his low tone quivering.

Your cheeks tingled, making you focus back on the stove and served two plates almost in a methodical way. “Do you think it’s strange?” you pried. “That I want to be with two people at once?”

“You know I don’t think so,” he replied matter-of-factly. “If the real question is, do I think people would find it strange, then yes.”

You coughed up a chuckle. “That’s helpful,” you scoffed, but you could not ignore that it had deflated you a little.

“But they’re not us,” you felt him shrug behind you. “What matters is what happens between Joshua, you and me, right?”

“What do you think?”

Jeonghan pondered for a second. He stopped hugging you and took the plates from the counter, turning to set them on the table. "Sit," he nodded to the chair before turning back to grab the two cups of coffee.

You sat down as Jeonghan set a cup down on the table for you and then himself. He then dropped himself into the seat next to you, a hand flipping the visor of baseball cap.

The tips of his ears poked out; his hair tucked behind them. You instinctively reached out to push some lose hairs behind his ear, drawing his heavy lashed eyes to yours.

A small smile appeared on his face as he caught your hand, pressing his lips to the pads of your fingers. Your stomach dropped in nervousness.

“So?”

“I don’t think it’s weird that you want to be with Joshua and me at the same time,” he said, sinking his fork into the omelette. As he chewed on his food, he lifted his gaze to the ceiling, appearing to be formulating his sentence: “I think we haven’t talked about the… more complicated aspects of dating two people at the same time. At least not the three of us.”

“Oh, so you have. You and Joshua?” you raised your eyebrows.

He nodded. “I asked him if he was sure about all of this,” his lips pouted as he chewed.

“What did he say?” you asked slowly.

“Eat,” he motioned to your untouched food, noticing that you were so caught up with the conversation that you forgot to eat your omelette. “I asked why he agreed to this, since he’s the most jealous guy I’ve ever known,” he shrugged, pausing with the piece of omelette in front of his mouth. “He says he doesn’t know why, but he wants this. You know?”

You nodded, chewing on your food.

“But I think we need to have this conversation again, the three of us when he comes back,” he continued, much as if his thoughts had organized neatly in his head. “Because I’m new to this, sometimes I feel like I’m catching up to the two of you.”

“I’m new to this too,” you frowned.

“I mean that I’m sort of… joining the two of you. Joshua and you already have an established relationship,” his eyes flitted around the room. From the two large noise amps that sat on the corner of the living room, to the table beside the dining table covered in photo frames of shots of you and Joshua. His eyes glanced at the shoe rack by the front door, filled with your and Joshua’s shoes before resting on you once more. “I just got to the party.”

You smiled at the way he conceptualized the polycule you have arranged. You set your elbow on the table, resting your head on your fist. “Well, we have time to bring you up to speed,” you smirked at him.

That seemed to catch his attention. His eyebrow quirked up. “Mm, I like to hear that,” he smirked back at you. He looked at your other hand resting on the table and did not hesitate to take it in his, his fingers playing with yours. “When do we start?”

“Today,” you giggled when you did not skip a beat to give him your answer. “You need to get ready because you're going to speed through this, old man.”

Jeonghan laughed, the sound of his chuckles warming your heart. “Oh yeah?” he arched an eyebrow. “What are we going to speed through today?”

“I don’t know what the steps are,” you admitted. “Joshua and I kind of flew through the steps to having conventional a relationship.”

“And I just got here to make it even more unconventional?” he added, smirking playfully.

“Or to make it more fun,” you quipped but then you shook your head. “I don’t know. You could take me out on a fancy dinner. Give me a reason to dress up.”

“Is that step number one?” he asked, enjoying your playful back and forth.

“Oh, no, you’re in like step number five already,” you quipped with a light chuckle.

“Ah, yeah?” he raised his eyebrows. “When did I climb the other four steps?”

You held up a hand and showed him your pointer finger, signaling a number one. “We hold hands,” you held up another finger, signaling number two. “We’ve kissed, multiple times. Three, we’ve slept together, four we’ve had sex–,”

“Multiple times,” he rolled his eyes. “Yeah, you’re right. What’s next?”

You shrugged. “You tell me,” taking a big gulp from your cup of coffee.

“I’d like you to meet my friends,” he said, giving you a meaningful look.

Jeonghan gave a lot of importance to his friendships. You knew that even before you met him, since Joshua told you about him, about him being his greatest confidant. So, meeting his friends meant a lot to him.

Your ears perked up at this. “Oh, your friends from work?” you asked, and he nodded with his head meekly. “Let’s do it. I’d love that.”

“Nice,” he smiled with satisfaction. “Step number five.”

“You’re gonna grow bored,” he commented off-handedly as he held the door open for you.

“That’s why I brought a book with me,” you replied with a sing-song tone. “I don’t really know what you do for your job, so I probably will be paying attention to you.”

“That’s not…” he sighed and dropped his gaze to the ground, smiling shyly. He took your hand, looking at your fingers as you laced them with his.

You laughed in nervousness at your own bad attempts at flirting.

Jeonghan lead you through the establishment. You had been here before, but everything you remembered about the place was a blur. That time you were distraught, your mind was cluttered with thoughts about your big argument with Joshua, and your feelings for Jeonghan.

The interior of the place was beautiful, it struck you along with its quietness. As you followed Jeonghan through its cold halls, you marvelled at the walls decorated with large posters of their most successful plays.

“This way,” Jeonghan whispered, not really noticing that you saw his name plastered on one of the posters. He opened a door to you, showing you to the room that extended bellow you in rows of seats, and large steps that lead to the big stage. “Come on.”

The stage was not vacant, as you initially had expected. A group of people sat in a circle, and some were practicing a choreography in the background, a couple of men pushing a large stage prop to one corner.

It was so packed in fact that no one noticed you and Jeonghan coming in. “Wait here,” he mumbled, showing you to one seat in the front row.

You watched as Jeonghan paced towards the stage, rolling the sleeves of his hoodie up to his elbows. Something encircling his wrist caught your eye, just as he grabbed it to toy with it. It was your scrunchie, and it had been so long since you had seen it that it brought a smile to your face.

You sat down on the seat, closely following Jeonghan. He put himself to work at once, he was handed a tablet and people approached him, you saw him nod and shake his head, then he pointed at the stage lights.

He nodded to the person he was speaking to and seemingly came to an agreement. Then he turned, looking at the tablet in his hands as he approached your seat in the front row.

“Bored yet?” he asked, seating himself beside you.

“The opposite,” you grinned. “What are you doing?”

He lowered the tablet on his thigh. “Just doing a general revision before this rehearsal. We’re closer to putting this show together. These are the final days before the opening show,” he motioned to the table sitting on his lap. “And here I can see which are the scenes we’re going to rehearse, and I know what to oversee.”

You moved your head up and down, slowly. “Interesting,” you noted. “And what scene are we rehearsing today?”

Jeonghan leaned to your side, looking at the screen. “At the gates of Emerald city,” he recited the title scene with a pleased tone. “So, lightings, costume changes, the song, and choreography. Easy.”

You raised your eyebrows at him. “Easy, eh?” you mumbled.

He sucked in a breath through his teeth pensively. “I just have to make sure that everything’s going smoothly, you know?” he smirked. “Imagine I’m the teacher and the class are showing me their homework.”

You laughed, and that brought a big smile to his face. “And that’s all you do?”

“I get the playwright, the writers, the cast, the crew, and the budget,” he listed with a straight face, but you saw the cunning in his eyes. “I call the shots, baby.”

You snorted but drew from his confidence to say: “Alright, chief. Let’s see what you got.”

Jeonghan’s eyes flashed back to you, then to your lips. “Ready when you are,” he mumbled, continuing to lean to you when–

“Director-nim!” a snappy voice called from below one end of the stage. You followed the sound of the voice. The young man was flashing Jeonghan an annoyed look.

“What?” Jeonghan responded, his tone dropping to one you rarely heard on him.

“Yoon Jeonghan! Stop flirting and come here!”

“This guy,” he said under his breath as he stood up. “I’ll be right back,” he told you as he approached the group where the young man was showing him a daring smile.

The phone you stuck between your thighs started vibrating, pulling you out of your focus. Joshua’s name displayed on the screen, along with a photo of him that you took on one of your dates.

“Hi, handsome,” you responded to his call, a smile spreading on your face almost at once.

“Hi, beautiful,” his sweet voice came to your ear a second after. “I just landed.”

“How was your flight? You sound tired,” you noted.

“I didn’t get much sleep on the flight. But we’re on the way to the hotel and hopefully I can sleep before I begin with the promotional activities,” his tone dropped slightly, then he paused pensively before: “I can’t wait till I’m back home. I miss you already.”

A spasm in your chest made you choke out. “I miss you too, babe,” you replied, sneaking a look to Jeonghan walking back to you.

“I’ll call you when I’m at the hotel,” Joshua said. “I have to go.”

“Okay,” you mumbled. “Love you.”

“I love you too, baby.”

Jeonghan sat down beside you again, a knowing look on his face as he motioned a question with one movement of his head. “Everything okay?”

You tucked your phone between your thighs again. “Yeah. Everything’s okay. Josh just landed,” you sighed and looked back at him. “You?”

Jeonghan nodded when he saw your assurance. “These brats were trying to grab my attention,” he said with a hint of annoyance, which was quickly replaced with a cheeky smile. “They want to know who you are.”

“Oh, are they your friends?” you asked, sending a quick glance to the small group of performers gathered to one side of the stage. You caught the eye of one of the men. And you recognized him right away.

Jeonghan leaned back on the seat, crossing one leg as he nodded. “My friends first. Then I tried to get them into castings, and when I got my company settled they were there every step of the way.”

“They seem… fun,” you frowned, paying attention to the commotion that was starting to take place in the small group of Jeonghan’s friends. “I know one of them.”

“Who, Seokmin?” he guessed right away.

“Yeah, he was–,”

“Joshua’s flatmate, yeah. I introduced them,” he smirked.

“And you think it’s okay to introduce them to me like this?” you asked sheepishly.

“Well, we don’t have to give any explanation,” he shrugged. “But I do see how this could be uncomfortable for you.”

“I just don’t want people close to Joshua to think that I’m cheating on him,” you whispered, dropping your gaze to your hands.

Jeonghan stilled. “Yeah, I didn’t think of that,” he sighed with a hint of disappointment. “Maybe we could do this another way.”

Your heart deflated at once. “I still want to meet them.”

He pondered about it for a second. “I don’t want people to think you cheated on Joshua either,” he agreed, pursing his lips. “Tell you what, let’s wait for another opportunity. With a lot more privacy.”

You looked around the theatre room, catching several pairs of curious eyes on both you and Jeonghan. “Yeah, you’re right.”

After being with him all day in what truly felt like a regular day you would spend with a partner, Jeonghan took you to dinner with him, and went for a stroll, talking about everything and nothing while holding hands.

It had been a nice time, but more pressing matters distracted you: work. You needed to work since the last few days your focus was on enjoying Joshua’s last days at home.

“Are you… staying the night?” you asked as the car turned down the street you lived in.

Jeonghan had one hand on the steering wheel, and the other was clasped with yours. “No, baby, not tonight,” he decided after two long seconds.

“Can I ask why?” you asked with caution.

“I have to do some work early tomorrow. Plus, I don’t have clothes, or a toothbrush,” he replied with a shrug.

You looked at your hands laced together. “You can bring some of your things, so you can stay someday… if you want.”

You hated how tiny and vulnerable you sounded. But you did not want to spend the night alone.

But Jeonghan did not notice, his focus was on pulling to the curb right in front of your building. “I’ll bring some in, baby,” he replied aloofly.

“Okay,” you replied begrudgingly.

But you did not make a motion to exit the car yet, your seatbelt was still put on, your hand still in his. Jeonghan smiled, noticing your reluctance. “Come here,” he breathed, leaning towards you, a pair of fingers slipping beneath your jaw to kiss your lips tenderly. “See you tomorrow?”

“See you tomorrow, Hannie,” you replied with a sweet smile like his.    

Midnight Haze Rocks the World: New Album Breaks Streaming Records in 24 Hours

Read the headline on your monitor screen. A picture of the three members of Midnight Haze appeared on top of the article published that morning. It was the third day since Joshua left for his first tour with his band Midnight Haze. And as expected, the internet flooded with overwhelming love for their phenomenal skyrocketing to success.

As such, a lot of eyes were posed on Joshua. A deluge of articles and videos were coming out every day, about his personal life, about his artistic process to write his lyrics, and speculations about his lovers.

Joshua was right. There was a huge part of Midnight Haze’s following that suspected he had a partner. And there was an even larger part that suspected that he was no more than a womanizer.

To some extent, it was painful to read some of the things you found online. And as much as you wanted to avoid it, you could not. So you did what you knew best: bury yourself in work.

Midnight Haze Sold-Out World Tour Breaks Box Office Records

It had been ten days since Joshua left.

His texts came less often. Same as his phone calls. Whenever he did call or text, he said he was busy, stressed. But he was trying to keep in touch with you. And that was all that mattered.

Midnight Haze’s Joshua Hong and Mysterious Woman Spark Romance Rumors at Exclusive Event

It was fourteen days since Joshua left. It was becoming more difficult to ignore the headlines and rumours created around him to draw in attention from the public and his fans. Although he seemed more consumed by the fast-paced nature of his job, he still called everyday.

Deciding you had your fill of nonsense you found online, you rested your head in your arm, sighing deeply in exhaustion.

“Baby, wake up,” Jeonghan’s soothing voice pulled you from your dreams.

You lifted your head abruptly, drawing in a breath. “I’m up,” you blurted sluggishly. “What’s up?”

Jeonghan giggled as you rubbed your eyes. You were in your studio, sitting on your armchair. There was drool smeared on your cheek, as you came to find out when you rubbed your face.

“You fell asleep,” Jeonghan pointed, giving you a kind smile. “Let’s go to bed.”

“When did you get here?” you slurred out. The room had darkened, the only source of light coming from your double monitor idle screens.

“Just got here,” he said, and you had started to notice the hint of concern in his voice. “Go to bed, so you can sleep better.”

You turned to your screen to look at the time. You had been asleep like this for nearly four hours. “Oh no,” you gasped. “I slept for too long. I must keep working.”

“Why?” he asked slowly. “You’re clearly tired, baby. Sleep some more and come back when you feel more refreshed.”

“Mmn,” you pondered his request for a second. You ran your sleeve over the tiny puddle of drool on your desk and looked at him.

Jeonghan was standing beside you, looking at you as if you were a baby in your crib. “You missed here,” he whispered, bringing the tip of his finger to the corner of your lips.

You slapped your hand to your lips, wiping the drool that was there.

He giggled. “Come on, princess, let’s go to bed,” he egged, motioning to the door to the bedroom.

You shook your head. “I want tea,” you pushed yourself from the chair.

“Tsk,” he sighed heavily, but he followed you down the hall, nonetheless.

“I don’t want to hear it,” you mumbled groggily, knowing what was coming.

“You’re overworking yourself again, Princess,” he reprimanded.

“Here we go,” you said in a sing-song tone.

“Just rest for a day!” he suggested with earnest. “You’ll feel better, and probably will get more work done.”

“I can’t rest, the deadline to submitting the first draft is nearer,” you protested as you got to the kitchen, getting to the electric kettle, filling it with water and turning it on. “And I’m nowhere near done this draft.”

“There is nothing wrong with taking a break for one day,” Jeonghan tilted his head to one side, his brown eyes following you. “Just take a break for once.”

You locked eyes with him, now considering his request.

“For me,” he added, the corners of his lips tightening, trying not to break into a smile.

“Pfft,” you scoffed loudly when he finally gave in, laughing merrily at his own cheesy addition. “See, I was considering it, until you said that,” you pointed.

“Please?” he said, bringing a halt to his laughs and his features took on a more serious look. “Just for tonight.”

“Okay. Just for tonight,” you conceded, heart fluttering uneasily when he smiled in victory. “Tea?” you raised your eyebrows.

“Sure,” he muttered, nodding with his head once. He had crossed his arms on his chest, his eyes trained on you as you moved in the kitchen. “Did you stay up writing last night?” he pried.

“And the night before that,” you sighed, handing him a mug of tea with milk. “It’s just not going well.”

“Can I ask why?” he leaned back on the kitchen counter.

“It’s just a writer’s block,” you shrugged, but both of you knew that was not true.

“What is the problem?” he asked again, his tone was gentle, it gave you that cozy sense of familiarity he never failed to give you.

“I just can’t…” you started faintly, toying with the teaspoon. “I’m out of ideas. I planned the whole book, the whole trilogy, but I just can’t string them together. I’m paying too much attention to tiny details, and I can’t get my creativity flowing.”

Jeonghan pursed his lips. “It seems like you have the problem narrowed down.”

“Yeah,” you said dejectedly. “I just can’t solve it.”

“Well, stepping back can help,” he shrugged, flashing you a knowing look. “Maybe you need to… reframe your initial ideas.”

It was reasonable that Jeonghan had experience with this. His line of work is very similar to yours, in some way. Even if he did not always write the plays he directs, he knew what a creative block was.

You rolled your eyes to the ceiling, humming pensively as you tried to retrieve your answer. “I wanted this book to be like a bridge gapping the first and the third book but, now it just feels like I’ve written myself into a corner.”

“Don’t say that,” he protested, leaving his mug aside. “I get that you’re stressed and the deadline and all that,” a hand reached out to grab yours, gently pulling you towards him. “But you’re talented and smart enough to get out of any corner you find yourself in.”

His arm circled on your lower back, and your hand fell on his chest. It brought a smile to your face to hear his words. “Thank you, Jeonghan,” you said. “You’re right. I just focused on the smallest details, now I feel jaded.”

He nodded in understanding. “I know how that feels,” he said, his kind voice lowering a little. “Listen, why don’t we just relax for now? Continue tomorrow, take it one step at a time, see where that gets you.”

You nodded, sighing deeply. “Alright.”

Jeonghan smiled cutely at you, making tiny dimples appear on his chin. “You got this, baby,” he mumbled.

“Thank you, Jeonghan,” you whispered, meekly pushing yourself on your tiptoes to reach his lips with a kiss.

“Don’t thank me,” he breathed, his other hand came up to cup the back of your head, his fingers tangling with your hair. He slotted his lips between yours, and you tasted the sweetness of green tea mixed with sugar in his kiss.

“Mmn,” your hands found his face. Jeonghan’s kisses were always tender, and delicate. Almost as if kissing the petals of a rose. Even during make-out sessions, just as this moment was turning into, he kept his lips gentle on yours.

But he pulled away too quickly, sucking in a breath between his teeth. Dropping his head back, he stared at the ceiling. Jeonghan had been doing this for the past few days: stopping himself before the kissing went too far.

“What’s wrong?” you mumbled.

He shook his head silently, and then he lowered his eyes to meet yours. “Let’s go to bed,” he suggested, taking your hand again.

“Okay,” you whispered, a coy smile appearing on your face.

“Knock it off,” he snapped, but he started smiling too.

“I didn’t do anything!” you giggled as he took you to the bedroom. “What’s with that serious face? I thought you were onto something.”

“Careful, princess,” he cautioned, but you heard the hint of playfulness in his tone.

“Or what?” you smirked as you sat down on your bed and kept your eyes on him as he emptied the pockets of his black sweats on the nightstand. His phone, the keys to his car and apartment, and a green vape pen.

“Or nothing,” he huffed, motioning at the bed. “Are you going to lie down?”

“Yeah, I just…” you saw him lie down on the mattress; legs spread wide open. You sighed.  “I’ll change into pjs,” you announced, a smirk painted on your face as you rose to your feet, stripping your cozy pullover with one movement and then your pants.

“Tsk,” he clicked his tongue and reached for his vape pen, tucking it between his rosy lips. Even as you turned your back to him, you knew his eyes were on your semi-naked body. You sent him a glance to confirm your suspicions were true and smiled.

“Don’t smoke in my bedroom,” you chastised him, but your tone was made insecure by his eyes staring at you.

“I’m not smoking,” he mumbled faintly, and his statement was true. He had not drawn from his vape pen yet, but he kept it tucked between his lips.

You finished smoothing Joshua’s oversized t-shirt over your frame and walked to the bed. Jeonghan watched you crawl to where he occupied the mattress, which was your side of the bed.

“What does it taste like?” you wondered, tilting your head in curiosity.

Jeonghan said nothing, he just handed you his vape pen, matching your curiosity with his eyes. And you took it, you tried to mimic his movements you always saw him do by tucking the tip between your lips. A faint smirk appeared on his face when you sent him a glance and sucked in a breath from the vape pen.

You started coughing at once. The light smoke invaded your throat and coating it with an overly sweet taste, making it impossible to get an actual experience of what Jeonghan was so addicted to. He chuckled as your coughing died.

“It’s slowly, baby,” he instructed, taking the vape pen from your hand gently and motioned your eyes to him. “Like taking a small sip from a straw.”

He took a draw from the vape pen slowly, his throat bobbing as he seemingly swallowed the smoke, and then exhaled it through his mouth and nose.

“Try it.”

You sent him a reluctant look, but took the pen to your mouth, nonetheless. Slowly, you sucked in a breath once again, getting a taste of the green apple flavor that reminded you of Jeonghan. Then you quickly blew the light smoke with your lips.

“That was disappointing,” you mumbled. 

“What did you expect?” he chuckled.

“This is what you’re so addicted to?” you raised your eyebrows, giving the pen back to him.

“No,” he rolled his eyes. “I was that or tobacco. And I just need to keep my hands and mouth busy. This helps,” he signaled to the vape pen.

“Hands and mouth busy, eh?” you smirked.

“Shut up,” he hissed, but a wide smile took over the features of his face.

“Make me,” you whispered, zeroing your eyes on him in a tantalizing way.

Jeonghan paused, the only sign that he was not expecting you say that was a single twitch of an eyebrow. He took a long draw, an even longer one, that went on for seconds, filling his chest out with smoke.

“Come here,” he said, not letting go of even a ghost of smoke through his lips. He extended one arm, his hand cupping your cheek, holding your face inches away from his. “Open your mouth.”

You instinctively parted your lips, just as he exhaled the smoke he had been holding in his chest, pouring it into your mouth. It felt cold, it tasted like green apples, it filled your senses with the taste of him as you exhaled.

Jeonghan sealed your lips with a kiss so soft it had you asking for more. You moaned, a hand coming to hold his face to help you kiss him harder, enticingly. “Princess,” he grunted through your continued attacks with your lips. “You need to rest.”

You pulled away from his lips, looking at him in utter disbelief. “Okay,” you frowned.

Rejected, you lied down on the opposite side of the bed to Jeonghan, turning over so your back was to him. Your heart deflated with pangs of pain at each beat, your mind riddled with questions as to why he was keeping you at arm’s length.

You jolted in surprise when Jeonghan’s arm encircled your waist, nuzzling his face in your hair. Just as he did the last time he slept in your bed.

“Are we just cuddling?” you sulked.

“Yep. Just cuddling,” he mumbled, scooting his body to yours so he could perfectly spoon you.

“Why?” you whispered, closing your eyes to push down the tears trying to sting them. You felt ridiculous.

“You need to rest,” he repeated with a calming tone.

“Jeonghan,” you turned over to see his face. “Did I do something wrong?”

He frowned. “No,” he shook his head. “Why do you say that?”

“You haven’t been… as physical as usual,” you mumbled out with caution. “I’m beginning to think that I’m doing something wrong.”

Jeonghan blinked, an alarmed look settling in the features of his face. “I just wanted to take my time with you,” he said, gentleness coating his words. Once he saw your features relax, he continued: “We started with the wrong foot. I wanted you to get to know me outside of the sexual aspect, you know?”

“But I do know you outside of the sexual aspect,” you blurted. “You’re my best friend.”

As soon as the words left your mouth, you wished to take them back. 

“That’s not…” Jeonghan sighed with a frustrated air. “When you mentioned the steps to a relationship, I thought we could take it slow, and let you know me intimately.”

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, yanking your gaze from his face.

“No, I’m sorry,” he replied in the same fashion. “I never wanted to make you feel rejected.”

You noticed for the first time, how struggling it was for him to speak out his inner thoughts. He was an excellent communicator sometimes, but it was different when it came to his feelings.

“It’s okay,” you reassured, now enclosing the space between you on the bed, so you could entangle your body with his. “But I’m confused. I do know you intimately.”

He shook his head lightly. “You mean as your friend,” he said wearily. “I mean as a boyfriend.”

Your heart stopped, and the moment between you too. In all the past few weeks you have been with Jeonghan, in all the considerations you were trying to bring into the relationship, you somehow thought that was a given.

“Wait,” he blurted, closed his eyes tightly and then: “I want to ask you formally.”

You blinked at him, a smile slowly curving your lips. “It’s okay,” you repeated. “I’d like that, Jeongjeong.”

“You would?” he smirked. “I’m sorry, it’s been a while since I’ve done serious relationships. And I’m old. So, I don’t know what’s in anymore.”

“You’re not old,” you said slowly. “And I don’t know what’s in either, so… Chances are that whatever you have in mind is something I like.”

“Okay,” he sighed, looking more relaxed, but then he pressed his lips into a tight line. “Just so you know, it was never within my intentions to make you feel like I don’t want you.”

“It’s okay,” you reassured with a light smile. “It was just confusing to me why you didn’t want to be physical anymore.”

Jeonghan let out a low chuckle. “Princess, believe me, there’s nothing more I want right now,” he rolled his eyes in shame. “Especially when you undress yourself in front of me, doing those sounds when I kiss you.”

You had to laugh at his face in complete frustration. “Well, if you had said something about it, I wouldn’t have teased you so much,” you pouted.

“Ah, really?” he snickered. “Really, princess? I don’t believe that for a second,” he emphasized.

“Why, don’t I get the benefit of the doubt?”

“Not when you’re both mine and Joshua’s partner, mm-mmn,” he negated with his head on the pillow.

“What is that supposed to mean?” you asked, though pointlessly. 

“You’re a tease,” he said with an obvious tone. “You know what will work on me because it works on him.”  

“Mmph,” you hummed thoughtfully. “You know I don’t see it like that.”

But it did sound familiar to something Joshua said a couple of months ago. It was something that you had started to find very real: Jeonghan and Joshua were so similar to the point it could be eerie. And it did not seem impressive to Joshua that Jeonghan would find you attractive, because he also did.

“Let’s go to sleep,” he said after taking a look at your face.

“Okay,” you conceded, turning over again to be cuddled by his body.

Some moments later, you could still hear him breathing normally. His movements were kept at minimum, but you knew he was still awake. He shifted slightly behind you, you heard the rustle of the bedsheets, when he moved his head on your pillow.

You just closed your eyes, trying to fall asleep but his body behind you was too distracting, your feet bumped into his, the warmth pooling inside your tummy making you smile.

Jeonghan shifted again on the bed, encircling his arm around your waist languidly, now his body fully pressed against yours. You could understand the reason why he struggled to find a position to rest with your body close to his.

“Are you okay?” you breathed.

He blinked, darting a look to your face. “Yeah, I’m just…” he sighed, smiling shyly at you. “You’re very warm.”

“You don’t like it?” you frowned. “We don’t have to cuddle, we could–,”

“I do like it,” he cut in. “That’s not the problem.”

“Then what is?” you mumbled, giggling softly at his indecision.

When you went to bed, you had forgotten to close the blinds completely, a faint light coming from the windows painted his face in a pale white color. You could see his eyes properly as he contemplated his answer.

“I don’t think I can wait much longer,” he mumbled, laughing sheepishly at his own demise. “I thought I could, but I guess I’m not so strong when it comes to you.”

Jeonghan had his arm folded and tucked under his head, so that way his eyes lowered to find your face as you turned over, your back pressed against the mattress.

“Well, you’ve been edging me and yourself for nearly two weeks now,” you said, smiling at him as he laughed harder. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“I want to be a good boyfriend to you,” he pursed his lip into a pout. But his hand parked on your tummy over your t-shirt.

Your heart stammered in your chest frantically, making your blood rush to your face. “You are a good boyfriend, Jeonghan,” you mumbled, flashing him a cheeky smile. “You can be a good boyfriend and have sex with me.”  

“I–,” he broke into an airy laugh, squeezing his eyes in utter shyness. “Don’t tempt me, princess. You’re tired and haven’t slept well.”

“Mmn, okay,” you said, but you could see it in his eyes: Jeonghan wanted you. His rosy lips parted slightly, his heavy-lidded eyes reading your face. “Come here, baby,” you whispered, sneaking a hand on his nape to pull him to your face.

Jeonghan reciprocated the need of your lips without skipping a second. The strangled sound that coiled in his throat only egged you on, your hands slid from his nape to graze his scalp with the tips of your fingers.

“Call me that again,” he breathed gruffly into your mouth as he repositioned his body on top of yours.

You paused, looking at his face that was now hovering on top of yours. “Baby,” you hummed, an ecstatic shudder shaking you when he saw the fascination flash in his eyes. “Kiss me… please.”

Jeonghan leaned down but stopped before he could reach your lips, a smile broke the features of his face. “You’re going to be the death of me. You know that, right?”

The tip of his nose bumped with yours playfully taunting you before he slotted his pretty lips with yours. You felt the weight of the pillows shifting when he placed his forearms on the sides of your head, caging you in. Blindly, you parted your legs for him just as he slotted himself between them.

He kept kissing you, he never stopped. The softness to which he was kissing you made you drunk, wanting more. “Hannie…” you whispered, turning your head as his lips kissed the apple of your cheek, trailing down to the line of your jaw.

“Tell me what you want,” he mumbled faintly, his breath fanning a spot below your earlobe.

You recounted in your head every sexual experience you have had with Jeonghan so far. Narrowing down what had made you so dissatisfied the last time you had sex with him was easy: there was a lack of connection with him. One that you craved deeply.

“I want you–,” you gasped when his lips reached your collarbone, as he pushed back his body, his hands retreated from your sides, finding the hem of your oversized t-shirt. His hands were cold upon sliding on your tummy. “I don’t care how, just do anything you like.”

A flash of déjà vu hit you hard. Jeonghan lifted his head from the curve of your neck, his long dark hair obscuring his eyes. “Anything?” he asked, tilting his head to one side slowly. “There must be something you need, princess.”

“I don’t know,” you smiled at him sheepishly.

Jeonghan leaned forward, his fingers trapping your chin. “I’ll do anything you tell me to,” he purred right before capturing your lips with his for a shallow kiss. “You call the shots, baby.”

Your breath hitched; his hand came to cup your cheek. “Keep going, please,” you muttered, though it was not necessary, his lips were still on yours, giving you soft pecks.

Jeonghan gave you no verbal reply, but he kept kissing you anyway, each kiss tenderer than the one before. It made you dizzy, the softness that he put with every touch.

“Jeonghan,” you put a hand on the center of his chest, bringing a stop to his sweet kisses at once. His dark eyes locked with yours, giving you the confidence you needed. “Can you be rough with me?”

Upon hearing your request, he stilled completely. “How rough?” he asked, much as if he did not give a second thought to your words, nor pause to ask why. He knew this was what you needed.  

“Just do it,” you asked, your tone waning over the nervousness that kicked right in. “I promise I won’t break.”

“I know you won’t,” he smirked, diving for another shallow kiss, laughing softly at the low grunt you gave him in protest.

Then he kissed you again. Harder this time, showing you how much he had been holding back. Before his touch had been delicate and tender. But now, his kiss was forceful, passionate. He crushed your lips, making you muffle out a moan in his hot mouth. 

“Want me to fuck your brains out, baby?” he rasped, backing away to take a look at your face. The lascivious glint in his eyes was unmistakable, and so eerily familiar.

“Yes, please,” you mewled, your hands snaked from his chest to clutch at his neck.

Jeonghan sighed in your mouth. “You needy little thing. You really are made for us.”

“I am,” you replied in a frenzy, returning each needy kiss he planted in your mouth.

A hand pushed your t-shirt up to your chest, uncovering your tits to him. “Do you know how fucking much I love these?” he rasped, sending you a look before dipping his head to litter your skin with kisses.

His lips attached to one of your nipples, his tongue toying with your pebbled bud, to then suckle at it with a smacking noise. “Fuck-k, baby,” you mewled, your fingers tangling with his long dark hair, giving it a soft tug.

“Mmn,” he searched for one of your hands on his head, grabbing it and driving it to the mattress. No touching, he wordlessly commanded, locking his fingers with yours.

“Sorry,” you whispered. “God, fuck,” you squirmed helplessly, the back of his tongue teased your nipple, swirling around it and suckling at it hungrily.

His free hand fumbled your other breast, his fingers pinching and tugging your hardened nipple as his mouth continued to work on the other, making it sensitive. He detached his mouth with a wet sound, his eyes marvelled at your body for a second as he released your hand.

“Behave,” he conditioned before leaning down again to tease your other nipple with his mouth.

First his lips tugged at it, to then graze at it with his teeth, making a sharp hiss come out from you. You lowered your gaze, finding his. Jeonghan smiled at you, pulling his tongue out to tease your nipple, swirling around it.

You sighed out the pleasure burning within you, sinking in the pillows as your skin prickled. “Please… more,” you mewled, your hands clawing on the bedsheets. “Keep going, Hannie, please.”

The corners of his mouth lifted slightly, but the motion of his tipped tongue did not stop. His hands cupped your tits, making them bulge, and he lowered his face onto your chest. The low grunt that he muffled in your tits told you that he was enjoying sucking at your nipples just as much as you.

You closed your eyes, focusing on the pleasure building in the pit of your tummy, your muscles clenched in response when he sucked harsher, then changed to toy with your nipple with swift motions.

“Ha-hannie,” you called shakily. “I think I’m gonna come.”

For a moment, you thought Jeonghan had not heard you. He made no move, no sound to acknowledge your words. He just kept going: sucking, licking, pinching your sensitive nipples. Drool dripped down on your bumpy skin, the wet sounds Jeonghan made, paired with the low groans he gave you whenever you moaned. 

“Oh god… I’m coming,” you choked out, hands clenching around the bedsheets. Your orgasm flooded within you, it was quick and sweet, and even though the feeling was short, it had you panting. And wanting more.

Jeonghan hummed with satisfaction, leaving a kiss on each of your nipples before meeting your eyes. “Was that a first?”

You recognized where his game was going at once. “Yeah,” you sighed with a meek smile. “It felt good. I needed that.”

“Mn, princess, you’re such a needy mess,” he said gruffly, his hand caressing your bumpy skin over your tummy. “Is that why you can’t write, baby? Too much in your head?”

“Think so,” you replied coyly.

Jeonghan sat back on his heels, contemplating you for a second under the pale light coming from the window. “These need to come off,” he toyed with the band of your wet panties with his lithe fingers.

He hooked his fingers around the hem of your panties, pulling them down your legs with your help, lifting your hips for him.

“No, not that. Keep that on,” he instructed when he caught sight of your hands trying to get rid of your t-shirt.

Then he stretched one arm, reaching for something on the nightstand. Your heart stammered when he grabbed his phone. “Are you ready for this?” he asked, sending you a glance.

“Yeah,” you replied.

The flash of the camera hit your eyes, making you squint at it. But you quickly adapted, seeing Jeonghan’s fascinated face behind his phone as he directed it to your naked body. He caught on video everything he liked to see: your face, your tits smeared in his spit, and your pussy.

“You got so wet, baby,” he mumbled, making a trail with the tips of his fingers from your bellybutton to your mound, caressing it. “Baby needs to be fucked everyday, or she can’t function properly. Right, princess?”

The white light returned to your face, you nodded. “J-jeonghan!”

His fingers continued trailing down, finding your pussy lips spread open. “So fucking wet,” he sighed in awe, dipping one finger in your pooling entrance. “You got like this just by playing with your tits a little…”

Another finger joined in, pushing inside your throbbing walls as the phone captured it in video.

“Jeonghan,” you protested. “Please, just fuck me.”

“Stay still, baby,” his voice was low whenever he gave you a command, and that way you knew not to challenge him again. “I’ll give you what you want if you promise to be good.”

You sighed in frustration. “I promise,” you hated the way your voice sounded.

That seemed to please him. The flash of the camera went off, Jeonghan tossed his phone on the bed near your body, pulling his fingers out of your pussy.

The loss of stimulation had you protesting with a lewd whine. “So impatient,” he tutted. Then he nodded his head at you. “Knees up.”  

His hand pushed on the back of your leg, making your chest compress a little right before he dipped his head to your needy pussy, his tongue swiping a line between your folds. Your muscles tightened under the overwhelming sensation of his tongue licking your arousal, drinking you in.

“Fuck,” you gritted, your hands flew to grab your own legs to keep yourself in place for him.

You heard a muffled laugh, his breath fanning your wet pussy causing you to shiver. The tip of his nose bumped against your clit as his tongue sank inside you, then retreated, only to dive in again, his face pressed flush against you, fucking you with his tongue.

A strangled gasp escaped you, his tongue left your pussy and was quickly replaced by his fingers, slipping them in until he was knuckle deep inside you. But his tongue slid to your clit, teasing it with swift jabs, getting it to swell by teasing it with his lips, tugging and suckling at it.

“Oh, g-god,” your body shook on the bed sheets, your eyes squeezed shut so tight you started to see colors.

The low hum he gave you was paired with one deep intake of breath on his part, breathing you in practically, his mouth unrelenting on your pussy. His fingers kept dragging inside and out of your throbbing walls, delighting himself with moans each time you clenched around him.

“Fuck, Hannie,” you mewled, pushing your head back onto your pillow. “Don’t stop, baby, please…”

Jeonghan pushed his face onto your cunt harder, groaning against you as his fingers thrusted inside you harshly, curving inside your walls and finding that spot effortlessly. Your mouth fell open, pelvis tilting towards his face. All focus, was narrowed to his mouth making out with your pussy, his fingers teasing that spot inside your walls.

“I’m there,” you sighed out. “Jeonghan, I’m coming,” you let out a long cry of pleasure, body shaking on your bed.

Your orgasm washed down your spine, burning inside you. His fingers kept thrusting inside you, his mouth helping you ride your high without stopping for a second to breathe. Just as you were coming down, he detached his mouth from your throbbing pussy, but his fingers did not.

“Jeonghan?” you panted.

His fingers kept teasing that spot inside you, the force from his hand on your cunt had started to make a single vein pop out along his forearm. “Can you give me one more, baby?” he asked, his free hand reaching for the phone he had discarded earlier.

“I… yeah,” you decided, holding your legs to your chest with your hands.

The camera flashed your eyes again. “Good girl,” he whispered, capturing the mess that you were in. It occurred to you that Jeonghan did not want you to remove the t-shirt you were wearing… he wanted to fuck you in it for Joshua to see.

He pointed the camera at his hand pumping in and out of your puffy cunt, the wet sounds coming from it sounded loud and almost dirty. His fingers picked up the pace, now teasing relentlessly inside you, making you gasp and jolt at each harsh jab.

“J-jeonghan!” you cried out.

“Careful, we can’t make too much noise, remember?” he smirked at you.

“I-if you keep going, I’m gonna… I’m gonna–,” you choked out, arching your back on the mattress as the hot liquid spurting from you landed onto his hand and the bed.

Jeonghan smiled, his fascinated eyes flitting from the screen of the phone capturing the mess you were making, to your body writhing on the wet sheets. “Tsk, messy girl,” you heard him say between the loud wet noises and your own breathless moans.

To see him smile sent you onto another wild frenzy. You moaned as his fingers left your throbbing pussy, his other hand tossing his phone heedlessly. Then, Jeonghan grabbed his t-shirt, peeling it off his torso with one swift motion.

“Remind me to put a towel under you next time,” he smirked, using his own t-shirt to wipe your arousal and his own spit from his chin, then his hands.

You sighed, embarrassment heating your face, but you could not deny that you liked this. And Jeonghan saw right through you. He leaned over to you, capturing your lips in a kiss, he smelled of you, and you could taste yourself in his mouth. The act was so dirty it had him swallowing your moans, your pussy clenching around nothing.

“Jeonghan… I want you to fuck me, please,” you whined when he pulled his head back.

“Do you think you deserve it?” he asked, his voice was low and slightly raspy.

“Yeah?” you smiled coyly.

“Why shouldn’t I edge you a little bit more?” he grabbed your legs, wrapping them around his waist, as he pressed his chest against yours, grinding his hips against yours.

The bulge of his hard cock pressed against your cunt. “Jeonghan,” you gasped when he ground against you harder, teasing you. “You’ve been edging me for days now.”

“You said I could do anything I wanted to you,” he smirked, his hand grabbing your jaw before pressing a chaste kiss on your lips. “

“But I want you now,” you mumbled wantonly.

“Don’t argue with me,” he retorted, the glint in his eyes giving away the playfulness behind his actions.

“Stop teasing me, Jeonghan,” you whispered, your hands holding onto his back as he kept rubbing his hard dick against you, smearing your wetness all over his boxers. “Please, I need you, baby,” you whined pathetically.

He dived for another hungry kiss. “God, you’re so fucking needy,” he protested, but his tone made him sound just as pathetic.

“Don’t mock me, Jeonghan,” you bit back. You should not have done that.

The slap came to your face in the blink of an eye, it was swift and painful, but the wave of both excitement and arousal barreled down your spine, making you gasp. Your widened eyes found his face, gaping at him as your cheek tingled.

“I told you not to argue with me,” Jeonghan laughed, and the sound of his laughter sent a wave of shame that burned in your face.  

A low moan escaped you when his hard cock rubbed against your swollen clit. “Jeonghan, please fuck me. Fuck me now,” you pleaded with a whiny tone, ignoring how pathetic you sounded, or felt.  

“That’s it, baby. Beg for me,” he purred, nibbling at your lower lip right before kissing you. His tongue caressed the roof of your mouth, making you whimper at the sensation.

Then you understood what he was doing, he pushed his boxers down, freeing his pretty cock. He grabbed it with one hand, one thumb pressing down his tip, directing it to your pussy. And just when you thought he was finally going to fuck you, he decided to do something else.

“I don’t hear you begging,” he said, fucking his cock between your pussy lips, making his tone waver. A low grunt escaped his lips, and you responded with your own.

“Please,” you breathed.

“Please, what.”

“Fuck me,” you mumbled, regretting the minute you asked him to be mean with you. But you could not lie to yourself, you liked this. You liked seeing his cock glistening wet with your arousal.

“I am fucking you,” he chuckled airily, pushing his hips against you so his tip nudged your entrance, but slipped between your folds.

“I need you inside me, Jeonghan,” you whimpered as his shaft rubbed against your clit. “N-need your cock inside me, please.”

“That’s better,” he sighed, retracting his hips to then sheathe himself inside you with one full thrust. He lowered the upper half of his body to yours, repositioning his arms above your head.

“F-fuck, Jeonghan…” you gritted as his cock filled your walls. You sighed in pleasure, finding his face with your hands to pull him in a kiss.

You saw something flash across the features of his face, making him groan as his lips met yours. “God,” he gasped. “I love how you squeeze around me, baby.”

“Y-yeah?” you breathed pathetically.

“Mmn, yeah. Your pretty little c-cunt feels like magic,” he shuddered in pleasure, grunting in your mouth before kissing you again.

“It’s yours, Hannie,” you replied dazedly.

“I know,” he grinned, his hand finding the back of your knee, pushing it to your side to hold you open for him. “You’re such a needy slut for us, right?”

A wave of arousal tore through you. “Yes,” you breathed. “I am.”

Jeonghan noticed your demeanor, your eyes glazing and mouth parting in utter pleasure. “Wait,” he stilled. “Turn over for me, baby,” Jeonghan pulled his body, sitting back on his heels as you reluctantly turned facedown on the bed. “Ass up.”

Then on your side, Jeonghan handed you his phone, the front camera was already recording. You grabbed it and searched for somewhere to place it, deciding for to put it against the lamp on your bedside table. You saw yourself on the screen and Jeonghan on his knees behind you.

Through the screen you saw Jeonghan sneaking a hand between your body and his, then felt the tip of his cock searching for your entrance. A strangled moan came out of you as he sheathed himself in, a hand pushing your lower back down for you to tilt your pelvis for him.

“God,” he groaned, his head lolling back, grabbing your hips with his hands as he fucked you slowly.

You were too entranced by watching his face through the recording to focus on his cock massaging your walls.

“You feel so fucking good, princess,” he swallowed a moan, making his throat bob. 

“Y-you too, Hannie,” you responded faintly, lowering your face back onto the bed covers to see him through the screen of his phone.

“No, no. I want Joshua to see your face,” Jeonghan rasped, grabbing you by the hair, pulling your head upward with little to no heed for you.

The sheer thought of Joshua seeing this made you clench around Jeonghan’s cock. He moaned in response too, his fingers digging into your skin, squeezing your ass firmly as his other hand kept pulling your hair.

“Jeonghan,” you called breathily, the hard thrusting had you panting already. The rails of your bed banged against the wall with the pacing of his thrusts. “Harder. Fuck me harder.”

Jeonghan laughed, ignoring you completely. He pulled your hair firmly, making sure the camera captured your teary eyes. “Jeonghan, please.”

“Alright, alright,” he conceded, placing his hands on the middle of your spine, pushing your chest onto the mattress. “You asked for it.”

You could no longer see yourself on the video, your face was mushed against the covers, giving you space to cry out as Jeonghan started pounding on you. The brutal pace of his thrusts knocked the air out of you, the sound of skin slapping against each other was the only thing you could hear above your muffled cries.

“Jeonghan!” you forced out, your sweet release flooding inside your body. “Oh, god, Hannie…”

“That’s it, baby,” he rasped. “God. Keep squeezing me like that,” his hands clenched on your ass, switching the motion to his hands, fucking you on his cock instead of moving his hips. “Fuck,” he gritted with a sigh. “Yeah, just like that…”

You gathered yourself, breathing in slowly as you lifted your head. In the screen of his phone, you saw him looking at your body, moving your hips to meet with his languidly.

“Hand me the phone, baby,” he made a motion with his head.

You reached for his phone in your nightstand and passed it to him, turning your head to see what he was doing. He was now pointing the camera lens to your ass, and you knew that he was capturing your messy cunt, filled with his cum as he kept pushing his cock inside you.

He was panting when he tossed the phone one final time. “Are you okay?” he asked breathlessly. “Want more?”

You shook your head. “I’m sensitive,” you admitted. And you were so tired that all you wanted now was to rest in the pleasure he had given you.

Jeonghan nodded, caressing your ass gently before pulling out of you. “Lie down, baby,” he muttered as you just eased onto the bed with a tired sigh. “I’ll bring you something to clean up, hold on.”

The bed shifted around you when he climbed off the bed and exited the bedroom. You closed your eyes, breathing out in pure bliss, enjoying how languid your body was after being pleasured over and over.

You heard him come in. “Turn over for me, princess,” he mumbled with a sweet voice. He had a towel in his hand, soaked in warm water. “What do you need?”

“Sleep,” you slurred out. 

Jeonghan nodded. “Do you have clean blankets?”

“In the closet,” you said, pointing to the double doors in the bedroom.

Jeonghan got a bundle of blankets, spreading them over your naked body to then slip beneath them and next to you. As you searched for his body to hold him, you realized that he had not slept naked with you before.

“Thank you, Jeonghan,” you hummed happily, wrapping your arms around his torso.

“For what, baby?”

“For taking care of me,” you mumbled, your heart swelling with warmth and love. “And for fucking my brains out.”

Jeonghan chuckled, his hand brushing your hair slowly. “Anything for you.” 

“Do you think we’ll get another noise complaint after this?” you asked sluggishly.

“If they come to the door, I’ll deal with it,” he said decidedly. “Sleep for now.”

You lifted your head to give him a kiss. “Goodnight, baby.”

Jeonghan gave you a sweet smile. “Goodnight, princess.”

“We have a date tonight,” Jeonghan announced the morning after.

“We do?” you asked. “You know, I’d appreciate it if you invite me out with more time in advance.”

“I forgot to tell you last night… you kept me busy,” Jeonghan rasped sleepily, his arm wrapped your back, his fingers trailing gently down your spine.

“So it’s my fault,” you laughed.

“We’ve talked about this,” he slurred out, but a lazy smile spread on his lips. “Everything is your fault.”

“Maybe last night was my fault,” you conceded playfully, lifting your head from his chest. “Where is the date?”

“Mmn, I don’t know, I have to ask,” he mumbled, his eyes were closed but you noticed his heavy lashes shaking slightly.

“Ask?” you inquired.

“It’s a double date,” he explained, peeling one eye open.

“Oh,” you gasped. “With whom?”

“My best friends,” he said with ease, but you knew how this important was to him.

“You have a lot of best friends, baby,” you chuckled.

“Mmn, yeah, you’re right,” he said, his voice was still lazy, but he had gained more lucidity. “These are friends I met in school, while I was getting my degree.”

“Exciting,” you smiled at the way the features of his face were lax in the serenity of his sleep.

“What?” he noticed, his lips pouting slightly as he asked: “What, why are you looking at me like that?”

“I like your face, handsome,” you mumbled sweetly, running the tip of your finger down the bridge of his nose.

Jeonghan looked confused for a second. “I like your face too, beautiful,” he whispered.

The effect his words had on you made you freeze in place. You leaned to plant a small kiss on his lips, which he reciprocated with a low hum.

But then you were turning around, reaching for your phone on your bedside table to check if you had any updates from Joshua. He had replied to your last few texts, telling you excitingly that he had a date for you to visit him soon. And that he could not wait to see you again.

“That reminds me,” Jeonghan sighed, reaching for his own phone on the bedside of your side of the bed.

The videos. As soon as he unlocked his phone, the sounds from the night before flooded your ears: your whiny moans, the sounds of skin slapping together. Jeonghan wrapped one arm around your waist as you leaned your head on his shoulder and watched the videos you recorded together.

You hid your face flush on his shoulder when you saw a few seconds of one of the videos, making your insides twist in utter shame. “Oh god,” you groaned.

Jeonghan rested his hand on the back of your head. “What?” he asked, shifting his face to take a look at yours.

“It’s so…” you made a motion to the video playing on the screen, grimacing at the lewd sound of your moans.

“Hot?” Jeonghan lowered the phone after hitting Send with his thumb, sharing the videos to your boyfriend with nothing else to say in the message, no preamble whatsoever.

“Can I see?” you mumbled, extending your palm.

“Sure,” he deposited his phone in your hand without hesitation.

The videos were saved in a secret folder that he shared only with Joshua, you realized. “You were quick,” you said. He must have created the folder after recording he fucked you in a changing room.

“I don’t want them to fall on the wrong hands, princess,” he muttered, lazily drawing in a breath before yawning.

“Mmn,” you swiped your finger through the set of videos. You saw your face in so many of the frames captured. “Can I have access to this too?”

“Of course, baby,” he giggled sweetly. “I should’ve asked, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” you mumbled, aimlessly fidgeting with Jeonghan’s phone. You went back to the main folder where he kept all of the photos he took.

Jeonghan did not stop you, so you dived in the rows of snapped memories. Most of the photos were of himself with his friends, photos you helped him take, photos with you… Joshua.

The tip of your finger chose a photo, almost as if it had a mind of its own. “Where is this from?” you asked.

Jeonghan had chocolate brown hair in the photo, his head leaned on Joshua’s shoulder. The smile plastered on his face was sweet, two fingers in a peace sign held to the camera. Whereas Joshua had a pale bond hair, also smiling and holding a peace sign.

“That was… I think it was one of the first times I saw one of his shows,” he said, coughing a laugh. “He was a complete mess. He wasn’t the confident sexy rockstar you know now.”

“Mmph,” you smirked. “So you think he’s sexy?”

The restaurant was located on top of a hotel building. The tables were beautifully flanked by water gardens, lamps hanging from the open ceiling, illuminating everything with a warm orange glow.

“They’re usually late,” Jeonghan explained. But this was not said with his nonchalant and characteristic way. He anxiously looked around the tables with a pout on his face.

The air was damp, urging you to fan yourself with your hand in slow, lazy motions. Jeonghan wore a white shirt, unbuttoned all the way through, a white tank top underneath it. His long dark hair tucked behind his cute ears, he chewed on his lip.

“Are you nervous?”

His fleeting gaze fixed on your face. “A little,” he admitted, giving you a meek smile.

“Should I worry?” you raised your eyebrows.

“No, baby, not at all,” he slipped a hand under the table, finding your thigh to five it a squeeze.

“Okay,” you sighed, returning the smile he had given you.

Then you saw a familiar face, something helped by the fact that you had scrolled through Jeonghan’s photos on his phone. It was a friend of both Joshua and Jeonghan’s, but apparently so, Jeonghan had met this person long before Joshua did.

“They’re here,” he announced with a shaky mutter, standing up as the couple approached the table.

Then, with the nervousness that you had never seen in him before, he introduced you to his friends by name, sending you a glance. He probably saw the nervousness mirrored in your eyes, but somehow his confidence was restored upon mentioning that you are his girlfriend.

The man that was introduced to you as Choi Seungcheol blinked from your face to Jeonghan’s one time only. There was something exchanged there, but it was quite obvious that the man was not understanding this. The thought of this going badly set your nerves on fire.

“It’s so nice to finally meet you,” his girlfriend stepped in quickly, reading the situation too. 

“Baby, why don’t you go with Cheol’s girl to see the water gardens?” Jeonghan cut in, giving you a knowing look.

You paused before nodding with evident reluctance, stepping away from the table, leaving both men to have a moment alone.

“What the fuck?” Seungcheol whispered, looking around the tables to avoid dragging attention in. So he sat down.

Jeonghan returned to his seat too. “What?” he shrugged, pulling out his vape pen from his pocket.

“Why do you have the same girlfriend as Joshua?” as soon as the words left his mouth, Seungcheol grimaced.

“Because she is Joshua’s girlfriend,” Jeonghan replied with faux nonchalance, drawing a long stroke from his vape pen.

“Gimme that,” his friend gritted, yanking the vape pen from Jeonghan’s grip. “Jeonghan, I’m being serious,” he regained some control before asking: “Is she your girlfriend?”

Jeonghan exhaled slowly, trying to keep his heartbeat steady. “Yes, she really is my girlfriend,” he replied. “We’re both dating her.”

Seungcheol blinked, looking at his girlfriend in the distance walking alongside you. You both are looking quite friendly with each other, laughing, and chatting. “So, when you told me that you found someone, you meant…”

Jeonghan hated this, he hated to be open and vulnerable about his feelings. But this was Seungcheol. Jeonghan could not hide from him, and he did not want to.  “We’re all in a relationship, us three… It’s complicated,” he choked up a little, rolling his eyes to the sky. “I love her.”

For a moment, both men were lost in thought.

“Are you happy?” Seungcheol asked.

“I am,” he forced out. That was a lie; Jeonghan was not fully happy. There were somethings he still needed to figure out with you, with Joshua. But in that evening, he felt happy.

“That’s all I need to know,” Seungcheol sighed, pushing his hair back with one hand.

“Good,” Jeonghan agreed. “Can I have that back?”

Seungcheol rolled his eyes, giving the vape pen back. “You know, you’ve always been really weird, you and Joshua.”

This made Jeonghan tilt his head to one side “Weird how?”

Seungcheol shrugged. “I noticed it before but never said anything. When we get together, talking, or playing a game… something always made me think about it. It’s like you two share one mind. It’s creepy.”

“Pffft,” Jeonghan broke into a chuckle. “Alright.”

“What? You move at the same time, you finish each other’s sentences! It’s weird!” Seungcheol protested with a pout.

“Let’s order something to drink,” Jeonghan dismissed, raising one hand to motion for you to return to the table.

As soon as you sat down, you searched his face as he grabbed your hand again. You sent him a questioning look, subtly asking if everything was okay. Jeonghan laced his fingers with yours, giving you a reassuring squeeze with his hand.

And at that, the evening went on. Meeting his friends gave you another insight into his personality, and you were glad to find out that his friends were accepting of you. Soon, you felt a bit embarrassed for being so nervous before, as you realized that Seungcheol and his girlfriend were really understanding.

“Would you share a bottle of red wine with me?” you asked, reading the menu.

“I don’t know a thing about wines. But I trust you,” Jeonghan mumbled beside you. He chewed on his lip, absentmindedly mouthing the words his eyes were going over on the menu.

“You’re okay?” you asked discreetly beside him, darting a glance to the couple sitting across the table.

“Why do you ask?” he replied as quietly, shifting his gaze from the menu.

“You look worried,” you pointed, sending another swift glance. “Something happened?”

“Nah,” he discarded the idea at once. “I’m just thinking what to order, baby,” he said reassuringly, grabbing your hand to nibble at your knuckles with his lips.

“Let me order for you,” you offered, sweetening your voice involuntarily. “Something that goes with wine.”

His eyes triangulated to your own and your lips. “Alright, beautiful,” he smirked. “Impress me.”  

You gave him a badly coordinated wink. “I got you, handsome,” you said, laughing at yourself.

He shouldn’t lie to you, he reprimanded himself with a stab to his heart.

“Oh, shoot,” you muttered under your breath, getting your phone from your handbag. Jeonghan knew who it was before he even thought to glance at the screen. “I’ll be right back. Order, these,” you pointed with your finger at the menu, pressing the phone to your ear.

“O-okay,” he stuttered, watching you leave the table to take Joshua’s call.

Jeonghan hid his reaction behind the menu, but he knew Seungcheol was looking. The man was resting his chin on his hand, and Jeonghan wished that he just spoke what his eyes were trying to say. It would have been better that way, instead of suffering the weight of his dark gaze. 

But he ordered the bottle of wine and pasta that you pointed to before leaving.

The order arrived just as you were returning to your seat. Jeonghan made no question, no comment about Joshua’s call, like he usually did. But instead, he just grabbed your hand, giving it a comfortable squeeze before raising his wine glass and giving it a generous gulp.

Jeonghan made a face.

“What, you didn’t like it?” you asked, taking the glass of wine to your lips.

“It was just a big gulp,” he said with shame in his eyes.

“Small sippy sips,” you indicated, lifting a finger in a knowing expression.

Jeonghan laughed. “Sippy sips,” he repeated, giving you a nod before raising his glass at you. “You’re cute.”

You touched his glass with your own. “Try it again.”

Jeonghan took another sip cautiously, letting the rich taste of wine linger on his tongue as he savoured it. “It’s fine,” he decided, nodding approvingly.

“It’ll taste better with the food,” you pointed at his plate with your fork.

You ignored the two pairs of eyes watching your interaction with Jeonghan, smiling at him as he experimentally took a bite from his plate of pasta, chewing graciously and washing the flavours with the red wine.

“I like this,” he said contently, giving you a loving smile.

“See, I told you,” you replied in kind.

As the minutes passed, Jeonghan began to loosen up. His shoulders slacked, leaning back in his chair as he downed the first glass of wine and pouring himself another without you noticing. The warm glow of the lights above showed the light dewy layer of sweat on his forehead.

“Are you hot?” you asked innocently, setting your empty glass on the table, leaning towards him.

“You are hot,” he replied, breaking into a hearty chuckle.

“Shut up,” you rolled your eyes. “Not here.”

Choi Seungcheol lifted his head, frowning lightly at the pronounced sound of Jeonghan’s laughter, but made no comment. Jeonghan’s lucidity had started to wane, and only a keen eye like Seungcheol’s would notice.

“Let him have fun,” his girlfriend advised him, giving him a gentle nudge with her elbow.

Seungcheol nodded, visibly discarding his worry away with a light shaking of his head. “So… how did you two meet?”

Everyone on the table noticed that the question was good in nature, harmless, but indirectly putting you in a tight spot.

“Joshua introduced us,” you explained, ignoring the groan from the other two displeased parties. “He wanted me to meet his best friend.”

“How does it work?” Seungcheol asked, ignoring the more aggressive jab of his girlfriend’s elbow. “Sorry, I have to ask. I need to know.”

“It’s okay,” you assured. “I realize how this is confusing; it was for me too. But we just work it out. Make sure that it’s all fair for everyone in the relationship. It’s still all new but I’m glad we made this choice.”

Jeonghan placed a hand on your thigh in a subtle gesture of thanks. You eyed him, noticing the light glow in his face, the rosy cheeks, and lips.

“It seems like a difficult choice to make. How did you arrive at it?” now Seungcheol’s girlfriend asked, equally as curious. And you only understood it as them caring out for their friend.

“We had a threesome,” Jeonghan blurted, a bemused smile plastered on his face.

You realized too late, that as the night had worn on, Jeonghan’s demeanor had changed, from being rigid and nervous to being less coherent, and more reckless.

“You’re drunk,” Seungcheol sighed, dropping his forehead onto his palm at Jeonghan’s chuckles. He had been blunt in order to stop them from asking more questions.

“How much did you drink?” you asked him, taking in his flushed face, his glazy and unfocused eyes.

“I don’t know. A whole bottle, maybe,” he admitted with a slurry speech, a light frown on his sweaty face. “I’ll be right back.”

He grinned sheepishly as he excused himself from the table, walking disjointedly to the bathroom.

“I’ll take you home,” Seungcheol told you, motioning to a waiter to bring the bill.

“No, it’s okay,” you shook your head. “I’m okay, I can take his car.”

Seungcheol stilled, cocking one eyebrow at you. “He lets you drive his car,” he pouted sulkily, looking at his girlfriend. “He doesn’t even let me go near the wheel.”

“Come on,” you struggled to get the tall man through the hallway of his apartment, nearly dragging him into the marbled floors until you reached the master bathroom. You giggled nervously when his shoulder bumped against the doorframe, making him groan in pain.

“Fuck, I’m sorry,” he mumbled some seconds after, making you think that the alcohol had set deeper in him during the ride to his home.  

“Help me, Hannie,” you giggled at his clumsiness.

“Don’t you laugh, I’m drunk!” he pouted, his eyebrows pushed inwards in a cute frown.

“Sorry,” you sighed with a smile. “You’re a big baby,” you explained, groaning as you helped him sit down on the rim of the bathtub, you swiftly turned the shower on and kicked your heels to one corner of the big bathroom. Jeonghan languidly raised his head to follow your movements, tilting his head back to look up to see your face. “Let me take these off, okay?”

He blinked slowly, taking some seconds in to process your words, biting his lower lip, he nodded.

“Don’t get any ideas,” you whispered, but could not help to also mask your smirk as you worked to get his white shirt off.

Jeonghan smiled, giggling goofily. “Caught me,” he muttered, raising one hand to clutch your wrist, looking now at your arms working to get his clothes off. “You’re very beautiful.”

“Tha-thank you Jeonghan,” you awkwardly replied. “You're beautiful, too.”

That made him chuckle again, slowly, but it was a joyless laugh. “That’s not what you said earlier,” he muttered, raising his arms as you peeled the white tank top off his torso.

“Did I said something earlier?” you asked with genuine curiosity, making a gesture with your hands, motioning him to get to his feet, which he obediently did, but with paused movements.

“Don’t play coy with me,” he tilted his head to one side, his half-lidded eyes now lowered to find your face.

“I’m not,” you blinked, but noticing it was just playful and drunken banter, you continued to undress him. “I–I’m taking your pants off, yeah?”

“Yeah,” he nodded, his head bouncing and then he smiled shyly, bristling when your cold fingers slid on his belly, unhooking the waistband of his pants to push them down. “God, I’m so drunk. This is not how I pictured this night going. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it,” you shook your head dismissively. “Are you okay though? Can you step in the shower?”

Jeonghan nodded, wordlessly moving to stand under the shower stream. He let his head hang forward lazily as he seemed to come back to life under the lukewarm water.

“Is the temperature right?” you asked, leaning against the wall, enjoying the sight of him standing upright, and tilt his head back, letting the water shower on his face fully.

His hands pushed his damp hair back, feet stumbling clumsily as he seemed to lose his balance for a second.

“Be careful,” you mumbled, quickly shuffling on your feet to ready yourself to lend him a hand if needed.

“I'm okay, I'm okay,” he tried to reassure you, but your brow did not relax. “I’d be better if you hop in here with me.”

“Jeonghan,” you said chastising.

“Alright, alright,” he chuckled, nodding his head as he washed his face nearly methodically. When he was done, he looked around and said: “Can you pass me that towel?”

You should have known better, from the moment he did not seem to be shutting the tap off, you should have just waited but you dumbly grabbed the folded towel and handed it out to him.

Jeonghan was swift, grabbing you by your arm and pulling you in with such a strength that you nearly stumbled over his body.

“Jeonghan!” you squealed, awkwardly steading yourself before you made him stumble too.

But he seemed to be fine, laughing like a kid playing in the rain, his hands grabbed you firmly by your waist, pulling you to him so you were now pressed to his body.

“That’s better,” he whispered, making you stop in your attempt to step out of the shower and raised your eyes to him.

“You’re crazy,” you half scolded but could not continue suppressing your smile. “I don’t have a change of clothes,” you mumbled, being swiftly swept away by the beauty of the man in front of you.

Now you remembered. You had called him handsome. You called him in the same way you did to Joshua routinely and although he noticed your clear mishap, he liked it.  

“I can lend you something,” he replied, his voice was barely a mumble. “Will you stay here? With me? Please.”

You quickly understood what he was doing, playing the same cards you did on him when you wanted him to stay the night at yours. You smiled at him knowingly and he quickly returned your smile, although his was relaxed.

“Of course,” you whispered, eyelids fluttering repeatedly when Jeonghan swayed your body in a drunken motion, the shower stream washing over you, dampening your hair and dress.

“Good,” he mouthed, pressing a lazy kiss on your mouth. Then his hands moved from your waist to remove the pin from your head, releasing your hair.

“Jeonghan,” you called when he pressed desperate kisses on your lips, trailing down to your chin and then your neck, breathing heavily as if tired. “Hannie, let’s get you to bed.”

“Mmn, yeah, okay,” he sighed, but he did not stop kissing your neck, lips pressing quick kisses. But then in a movement, he lost his balance once again, his body stumbling over, pushing your back against the wall. “Oh, shit, shit. I’m sorry,” his hands held onto the wall to regain some balance.

“Let’s go,” you insisted, blindly finding the tap with one hand to shut it off.

You managed to slip the straps of your dress off, removing the soaked material from your body and stepped off the shower, grabbing the nearest towel from the hanger and wrapped your body, handing the bathrobe to the very drunk Jeonghan who just followed you with his gaze.

“You look troubled,” he mentioned, much as if he could not stop his mouth. “Am I overstepping?”

“No,” you immediately blurted. “No, Hannie, I’m just worried about you.”

“Don’t be,” he muttered, squaring his shoulders as he adjusted the knot of his bathrobe. “I can do this, I’m fine.”

Then he turned to leave the bathroom with a slow pace in his footsteps. “Jeonghan, wait,” you chuckled at his determination.

You followed him out of the bathroom, across his walk-in closet and to his bedroom. Where you were mildly surprised by the minimalism of the space occupied by a lonely king size bed. It was neatly made, the white covers folded by the hem, pillows fluffed.

Then you realized, Jeonghan had not spent a night at his place in a while. He had been spending night after night at yours, just sleeping and leaving the next day for work.

Jeonghan stood by one of the sides of the bed, clumsily getting on it with his hands and knees crawling to slump down on the pillows with a pleased groan.

Hesitant, you approached the other side of the bed, sitting beside his body, thinking that he had already fallen asleep. But he lifted one hand, blindly searching for your body. He first found your hand resting on your lap, then he palmed your thigh, right before he moved his head to rest it there.

“I’m sorry, this wasn't in my plans for tonight,” he mumbled, his cheek was tightly pressed against your towel covered lap, making his words partially muffled.

“It’s okay, Hannie,” you sighed, bringing a hand to caress his wet hair. “I’m beginning to think that you like being babied.”

He chuckled, his body vibrating slightly on his bed. “Yeah, maybe I do,” he replied, moving his face against your body to nuzzle you slightly. “But not like this. I wanted you to have a nice dinner.”

“I had fun tonight,” you replied with a sweet tone, feeling crushed when Jeonghan pouted, turning his head to see you face to face. “I thought your friends were nice.”

“Did you really?”

“Yes, of course,” you smiled at him. “Let me take care of you, yeah?” you muttered, his dreamy eyes blinking confusedly at you. “I’ll dry your hair and get you dry clothes, okay?”

Jeonghan took a long second before nodding with his head in a stiff motion. “Okay,” he conceded.

Once you got him to wear some clothes you found in his closet, he slipped underneath the heavy white bed sheets and covers, motioning you over to his side. Jeonghan was quiet, the kind of quietness that no longer felt welcoming, nor comfortable.

You unwrapped the towel before sliding to his side under the covers, thinking that he was about to fall asleep. But he raised his gaze at you, and your stomach twisted violently when you understood that there was a reason why he had been behaving like this.

“I want to be more than your best friend,” he whispered groggily, struggling to stay awake. “I want to matter to you as much as Joshua does.”

“Jeonghan, that's not what I meant,” you breathed, chest deflating painfully upon finding what the root of his erratic mood was. “I trust you.”

Jeonghan decided that it was best to wait to hatch this conversation again once he was sober. You waited for his answer, but instead, he was surrendering himself to the fatigue that was accentuated by the alcohol.

“Hannie,” you called, but he made no motion. “Talk to me, please,” you whispered, shaking under the stress of thinking that you had hurt him with your actions.  

“It’s nothing, baby,” he whispered languidly. He should open up before he gets worse, he told himself. But Jeonghan was not a person who would confess his feelings first. His ability to think coherently was almost completely gone, and he feared to say something he might regret the next day.

“Are you sure?”

“Let’s talk tomorrow. When I’m sober,” his hand came to your cheek, whispering a sorry when you bristled upon his cold contact.

“Yeah, okay,” you mouthed, wriggling closer to him, where he received you with a kiss on the crown of your head.

But you could not fall asleep at the same time he did. You watched him breathing slowly, his heavy eyelashes tremble in deep slumber. You kept your movements at minimum, as quietly as you could, admiring his beauty without him knowing.

When you could finally fall asleep, you adjusted in his welcoming embrace, letting yourself ease into his warmth and leaving your worries for the following morning.

Jeonghan groaned, waking up to a light, but throbbing headache. But you were buried beneath the bundles of white covers with him, peacefully asleep, your cheek squished by the hand you kept under it.

He remembered you tend to have a light-sleep when you wrapped your arms around his torso too. “Good morning, princess,” he whispered, sounding gruff.

Your arms tightened around him slightly before you moved your head back to lock eyes with him. You looked tired, but there was a calmness in your entire demeanor that Jeonghan knew that was not because of your recent sleep. It was something else.

His heart sank once again. Did he say something last night? What happened?

But you just pressed your lips against his, humming in delightfulness when he reciprocated the kiss. “I love you,” you whispered.

Shock, relief, joy. Elation. All coursed through him upon hearing you say those words. He knew just how much you had been overthinking, grappling with questions about fidelity, jealousy, hurt feelings and such. So, to hear you finally say it lifted a stone from his chest.

Jeonghan took one look to your face and smiled. “Well, look at that,” he whispered, teasing you. But he could not deny, he was over the moon pressing his smiling lips to yours repeatedly. “I love you too, princess.”

You smiled on his lips. “I'm in love with you,” you reaffirmed, almost as if it was relieving for you too to say it out loud.

Jeonghan laughed in your lips, shyly lifting a hand to cup your cheek. “I know,” he touched your forehead with his own. “I'm in love with you too. I have been for a while,” he whispered nervously.

“I know,” you giggled too. The truth was, whatever Jeonghan thought he felt, you felt it too.

“Mn, I know you do. You made me suffer a little,” he teased, his voice muffled by the closeness to which he kept his lips on yours, pressing them repeatedly.

“It wasn't on purpose, Jeonghan,” you replied with a remorseful tone, pausing the kisses to send you a saddened look.

“I'm joking, baby,” he cupped your cheek, moving his hand to tuck your hair behind your ear. “I wanted to wait for you to be ready.”

“Thank you,” you whispered shakily, denoting on how much this still affected you on an emotional level. “I'm sorry I kept you waiting.”

“I'd do it all over again,” he assured, his eyes reading your facial features slowly, committing to keep the glint in your eyes in his memory.

“I never wanted you to feel shunned,” you confessed, feeling emboldened by the honesty in his eyes, the softness to which he welcomed you in his arms. “I'm still thinking of how to make this relationship fair for everybody.”

“But this is fair,” his brow furrowed slightly, lips pouting slightly as he spoke. “I just wanted to feel reciprocated.”

“I know,” you nodded slightly, still looking at him in his eyes, which had something in his chest fluttering crazily. “I took my time to realize that.”

“It's okay. And it's all better now,” he whispered, leaning so his forehead touched yours once again. “I know this is hard for you.”

You nodded again, taking a deep breath. “Having two boyfriends is difficult,” you confessed.

“Yeah, I imagine. And it must be doubly difficult if both boyfriends are possessive, clingy, and obsessive, right?” he conceded with the smallest of smiles. “Maybe you should leave the thinking on how to make this fair for you to Joshua and I.”

“Mn, that would be nice,” you muttered, but you were quickly swept away by the softness of his lips, the way he hummed in delight as you kissed him repeatedly.

Jeonghan sighed deeply, nearly shuddering with the ecstatic feeling coursing through his veins. “I love you,” he whispered.

Both of his hands came to cup your face, squeezing your cheeks as he pressed more loving kisses on your lips. It made you smile the way his kisses took on a more hurried speed, as if he were trying to convey all his adoration before combusting.

“I love you, Jeonghan,” you replied when he stopped for air, deciding to keep his forehead resting against yours.

“I needed this,” he mumbled in between kisses. “Needed you.”

“I know, baby,” you admitted. “Me too.” 

Your hands searched for him while keeping your lips latched onto his. You found his torso, sneaking beneath his t-shirt. This time, Jeonghan did not protest against your touch, he let you touch his torso freely, roaming the skin of his back with your fingertips. You swallowed one of his moans, shuddering against you. 

“We never finished watching that show,” you muttered aloofly as you continued giving him open mouthed kisses, almost as if you found it impossible to part from his lips, and he very much welcomed it.

“What show?” he hummed, equally aloof, his hands were already on you. A groan tore his chest when his hands found your bare skin and he remembered that he held your naked body through the night.

“Love Island, I think is,” you giggled nervously when his hands pulled you to him just as he turned on the bed, lying flat on his back, with you on top of him.

“You think?” he asked, but none of you were interested on the topic of conversation, you and Jeonghan were all about to keep touching each other, unable to stop the warm, open kisses. “I thought we did.”

“Mmn,” you breathed out as you placed your knees on each of his sides on the bed. “They released another season,” you said right before diving on his lips for a longer, deeper kiss.

“Mn,” his hand cupped your chin, keeping you close with his pointer and thumb on you. “Wanna watch it, baby?” he asked, but his voice had dropped to a low, raspy murmur.

“Yeah,” you breathed out aloofly, then realizing how your voice sounded, you giggled.

“Right now?” he paused, his sweet brown eyes scanning the features of your face swiftly.

“Sounds like you have a better plan,” you quipped, running the tip of your finger down one of his cheeks, a soft smile spreading on your lips when you realized the lascivious need glinting in his eyes.

“I might have one,” he replied, a shyness in his face revealing itself in a smile and he finally giggle, making you do that too.

“Of course you do,” you quipped.  

“Come here,” he whispered, pulling you with his hand already on your chin for a kiss.

With that, Jeonghan came to his resolve. He was in love with you. And he was determined to make this work with you. No matter what.

✮ author's note: hi hi hi hi there i really have nothing to say. i was thinking of explaining the dynamic between bunny and joshua, and her dynamic with jeonghan but i hope i did a good job of conveying that in this chapter so tell me what you guys think? hehe also, i want to thank you guys for showing me your love for this fic in the last chapter. i was losing purpose in writing and seeing you guys show this fic some love made me so happy. i thank you for staying and for being here on this journey with me. i love you all 🩵😭 anyways, toodles!! ✮ STAY TUNED FOR THE FIFTH CHAPTER!! ✮ JOIN MY TAGLIST | PREVIOUS CHAPTERS | BUY ME A COFFEE? (●'◡'●) © RIGHTS RESERVED TO HANNIEWEEN I DO NOT ALLOW TRANSLATIONS, CONTINUATIONS, REIMAGINATIONS OF MY WORKS OR THEIR REPOSTING ON OTHER WEBSITES.

[lusagi666]

estoy rompiendo mis promesas

quiero cambiar muchas cosas y no hago nada para cambiarlas

cuando no hago nada me trato mal en vez de tratarme amable y sigo sin hacer nada

siempre es el dilema de aceptar lo que eres pero hacer algo para cambiarlo, siempre tuve problemas con esa formula

porque cada vez que he querido cambiar algo de mi, me siento profundamente defectuosa

es muy duro para mi ver mi estado actual, no lo quiero aceptar

quisiera poder hacer un juramento, a dios de que haré lo que sea para seguir mis sueños u propositos, pero no creo lo suficiente en una fuerza externa

no se si jurarmelo a mi misma es suficiente, despues de todo

me traiciono dia con dia tomando decisiones que no quiero, me dejo llevar por el beneficio inmediato en vez de a largo plazo.

mis propositos en cuestión son estos:

*cuidar a mi cuerpo: hacer ejercicio y comer saludable sin odiarme en el proceso por haber subido 10 kilos gracias al medicamento anterior.

*ser una buena psicóloga: leer más cosas y consumir más conocimiento en general.

*luchar más ante injusticias: i mean no puedo ser una justiciera social y probablemente no haga un gran cambio, pero quiero no ser tan tibia y poder promover espacios de bienestar o cuestionamiento

*dejar de tener miedo a que los demás opinen de mi: este problema siempre lo he tenido, ahora en menos medida me permite ser funcional pero aún me la paso mal, quiero dejar de pensar que todos me juzgan y que eso tome las riendas de mi vida.

* poder crear más arte pero este es más sencillo solo hay q dedicarle tiempo como a todas las anteriores.

quiero muchas cosas, a veces me da la sensacion de que mañana mismo voy a inicar con todo, eso me aterra

pensar que mañana seguiré igual, me aterra tanto no ser perfecta que elijo no ser un poquito.mejor

es como cuando nadas contracorriente, es muy muy dificil querer cambiar cuando te odias mucho

asi que aqui va mi otra meta;

* ser autocompasiva

[margiralt]

LA BUSCADORA DE AUSENCIAS.

Los pezones del mundo.

Las agonías son formas de no morir. Lo supo en las innumerables noches en que buscaba en mi cabeza soluciones para los problemas que veía en mi casa. La guerra fría entre sus padres, donde hubo muertos y desaparecidos. La enfermedad de su hermano menor, con sus voces y sus monólogos, y su cuerpo que cambiaba y ya no entraba en nada de lo que ella se hubiera imaginado habitar.

Porque un cuerpo es algo que se habita. Eso lo supo después. La chica fea gordita, que en la playa burlaban por sus redondeces, la llevó a desarrollar conocimientos sobre dietas, pero sobre todo, a llevarlas a cabo con firmeza, sin extralimitarme.

Es que su cuerpo se fue transformando a sus trece años, junto con su menarca, y sus curvas acentuadas, y la generosidad de la adolescencia la expuso a las groserías de los trabajadores de todos los edificios en construcción por los que le tocaba pasar.

Ella no creía provocar a nadie. Sólo maldecía por esas tetas que de chica prometió no tener nunca, pero crecieron como dos montañas voluptuosas, en punta para adelante, apuntando como metrallas a cuanto baboso las miraba antes de haber subido hacia sus ojos, sin conocer si ella era una mujer o una planta carnívora.

Le llamó siempre la atención que los hombres fueran tan limitados. Las prótesis mamarias son tan evidentemente falsas, como toda perfección. No obstante, he escuchado a muchos hombres elogiar que su novia o la mujer que le gustaba tenía unas hermosas tetas "hechas". Por eso pueden usar muñecas inflables o robots.

Las tetas de ella siguen la ley de gravedad, y han bajado su mira. Pero siguen siendo de carne. Y grasa. Sugestivas empanadas humanas.

Su intención durante ese tiempo era la de ser invisible. Que nadie viese sus granos, que salían indefectiblemente cada tres o cuatro días. Se aplicaba sistemáticamente pomadas y un ungüentos. Se lavaba la cara todas las benditas noches llevando su kit de tratamiento por donde fuere. Dormía en casa de dos amigas y ellas respetaban esa manía suya, como ella cumplía con su juramento del secreto de sus latas de comida escondidas en el placard.

Fue por esa época en que se llegué a lastimar la cara por querer apretarse esos horribles granitos amarillos, hasta dejarse cráteres.

También fue la época de las juntadas con Adriana y Silvia para hablar de sus soledades y de lo jodida que era la vida. Ella con el pelo que se le caía a raudales. Le diagnosticaron hormonas a full.

Decidió renunciar a lo que su papá mas apreciaba, su largo cabello rebelde hasta la cintura. Con el que jugaba a ser el "TÍO COSAS" de los Locos Adams.

Con sus amigas tomaban anfetaminas. Esas pastillas las hacía sentir algo fabuloso. Por un par de horas dejaban de ser unas adolescentes desdichadas y problemáticas, y se reían con una locuacidad que las hacía pensar en un futuro promisorio.

Fueron meses de tener en la punta de la lengua el entrenamiento de la ironía justa. Andaban pertrechadas de hormonas sin saberlo. Algo así como chicas portando minas en su cuerpo, a punto de estallar.

De hecho estalló. Su cuerpo, fea y todo, como se sentía, estaba lleno de sensaciones nuevas y que me estimulaban a seguir conociendo.

Luego se sentía culpable. Aparecían fantasías con otras chicas, o con hombres que ni conocía. Duraba un cenit y ante su ocaso ya era una chica feliz y con ganas de salvar al mundo.

Su temor, durante mucho tiempo, fue ser lesbiana. Hoy en día, con el mundo que vivimos, apoyo a las jóvenes que gritan sin ningún problema, sus derechos a tener cuerpo.

Luego terminaron las anfetaminas, dejó de reunirme con esa junta. Y decidió anotarse en la facultad.

Puerta cerrada a un pasado que siempre retorna de alguna manera, por suerte. La vida tiene esa forma de volver para recordarnos quienes fuimos. Y la risa es el recurso más genuino ante esa foto de una chica que aún se siente así, con tetas y pelo largo.

[atletasudando]

Alberto Rodrigues, nuevo talento brasileño en lanzamientos

Fuente: Fed. Paulista En el último Campeonato Paulista Sub-18, el atleta Alberto Rodrigues do Santos Filho conquistó el oro en lanzamiento de bala y batió el récord paulista del evento en la categoría con marca de 19,39.  Además, el joven también consiguió el oro en la prueba de lanzamiento de disco con una marca de 56,12, logrando el primer puesto.  Alberto es atleta de pista y campo de la Associação Cultural Nipo Brasileira de Araçatuba y viene despuntando en São Paulo y en el atletismo de base brasileño con grandes resultados y récords batidos.  Cabe señalar que el club cuenta con el apoyo de la Municipalidad de Araçatuba a través de la SMELR (Secretaría Municipal de Deportes, Esparcimiento y Recreación).  La FPA (Federación Paulista de Atletismo) contactó al entrenador de Alberto, Carlos Barbosa, quien reveló detalles de la carrera del joven atleta.  El técnico recordó el inicio de Alberto en 2019, con apenas 13 años, en un torneo en la colonia japonesa, donde el joven ya ha demostrado su talento. “A principios de 2019, con 13 años, Alberto fue a Adamantina/SP para participar de un torneo en la colonia japonesa. Fue entonces cuando me di cuenta de que tenía algo especial y le dije a su tía Andrea, entrenadora en Araçatuba, que Alberto debía ser incluido en la competencia de Lanzamiento de Disco y permanecer en el Lanzamiento de Peso”, dice el entrenador . “Pasaron algunos meses y en el Campeonato Paulista Sub-16 de ese año Andrea mostró interés en que Alberto entrenara conmigo para desarrollarlo para las próximas temporadas. Sin embargo, todavía tenía dudas sobre si asumir esta responsabilidad sería bueno para los dos”, recuerda Carlos. Coraje y voluntad de ganar  Sin embargo, todo cambió cuando el entrenador vio la voluntad y el coraje de Alberto en el Campeonato Paulista Sub-16 de 2019.   “Recuerdo claramente una ocasión en el Paulista Sub-16 en la que Alberto ya había fallado en los dos primeros intentos. En el tercero se volvió hacia Andrea y le preguntó si debía disparar desde parado. Al poco tiempo se me acercó y me pidió mi opinión, a lo que le respondí que los árboles son los únicos que se quedan quietos. Entonces decidió hacer su tercer intento girando y, a pesar de lanzar el disco más lejos que los demás, lamentablemente el implemento cayó fuera del sector de aterrizaje, lo que lo descalificó de la carrera. Inmediatamente llamé a Alberto a la parrilla e invité a Andrea a unirse a nosotros, manifestando que a partir de ese día sería su entrenador. Porque para mí, lo más importante fue el coraje que mostró, que él había estado buscando, pero era una rareza en los deportistas. También dijo que las medallas se oxidaron, sin embargo, el espíritu ganador fue para siempre. Terminé diciendo, nadie había tirado más lejos que él en esa competencia y aunque no había subido al podio, fue el gran campeón, porque venció a sus monstruos internos.”, recuerda el técnico con emoción. Capacitación  Carlos Barbosa revela que planea una preparación especial para que el joven entrene durante las vacaciones. “A partir de ahí, todos los feriados de julio, diciembre, enero y febrero y todos los fines de semana largos, Alberto va a Adamantina y durante todo el Año Escolar preparo macrociclos para la temporada, con volúmenes, intensidades y medios de entrenamiento, tanto físicos, como técnicos y Andrea lo acompaña” . Carlos deja claro lo talentoso y preparado físicamente que está Alberto a través de un entrenamiento específico encaminado al pleno desarrollo del deportista.“Quizás Alberto es el atleta más fuerte físicamente que he tenido, pero a pesar de eso, siempre lo han tratado como un niño de 13, 14, 15, 16 y ahora 17 años. Las sobrecargas de entrenamiento siempre han estado por debajo de lo que puedes, pero puedo decir que son mucho más altas que cualquier otro atleta de su edad en la actualidad. Tanto es así que nunca hemos hecho pruebas de carga máxima, ya que no veo la necesidad de analizar esta valencia, ya que en press de banca las cargas para 10 repeticiones están por encima de los 140Kg, en media sentadilla, también para 10x repeticiones, supera los 300Kg y en el Arranque (snap), ya tiene 3 dígitos 'mejor no decir, para no asustar a los contrarios'… (Risas). Creo que para el segundo semestre, Alberto lanzará el peso Sub-18 arriba de 21m y el disco de la categoría (1.5Kg), más de 60m, Rompe récords donde quiera que vayas  Alberto viene batiendo récords en la base y en el último Campeonato Paulista Sub-18 rompió el récord en lanzamiento de peso. Para el entrenador, todo esto es el resultado de una mentalidad fuerte y ganadora de todos los involucrados en la carrera del atleta. “Nosotros no pensamos en récords, pero yo siempre digo que debe dejar marcas en las categorías que pasa, para eso el referente es estar entre los 3 primeros de la historia de cada categoría. Eso lo conseguimos en la Sub-16, ahora en la Sub-18 y ya está muy cerca de estas marcas en la Sub-20, ya que en 2024 Alberto entrará en una nueva categoría”. El entrenador recuerda las expresivas marcas de Alberto también en 2023. “Este año se ubicó 1° y 3° en el Sudamericano Sub-20 en Peso y Disco, respectivamente, y aún tendremos el Panamericano Sub-20 en Puerto Rico”. Futuro prometedor en la categoría de adultos  Para el técnico Carlos Barbosa, todo el trabajo realizado por Alberto es una preparación para que su carrera se consolide y triunfe en la categoría adulta.  “Todo este proceso es solo una preparación para que ingrese al Adulto, en condiciones físicas, técnicas y emocionales, de tal manera que viva cada etapa de la mejor manera posible. Hemos visto a lo largo de la historia, infinidad de deportistas que desaparecieron en la Adulta. Haciendo una correlación, el mejor resultado de Alberto en el Paulista Sub-18 fue en el último tiro. Esa fortaleza mental, ese equilibrio a lo largo de las carreras es lo que vengo trabajando desde el día de la Programación Neurolingüística en el Deporte, algo que deja al atleta en condiciones de superar metas aparentemente insuperables” . Carlos termina la entrevista con la FPA revelando que Alberto batirá nuevos récords. “Créanme, pronto se romperán otros récords, aunque solo sean los récords personales de Alberto, porque el árbol es el que se detiene” . Read the full article

[bookishnerdlove]

EAPDD Capítulo 15*

"Como he dicho, dividir los fondos para la aduana." "Sí. Ya veo".  Noah se frotó las comisuras de los ojos con cansancio. James, el astuto mayordomo, se retiró de su despacho, que estaba conectado a su dormitorio. Las criadas, que le estaban secando el pelo recién lavado, también se retiraron rápidamente. Los ojos de Noah se abrieron de par en par cuando atravesó la sala vacía y abrió la puerta de su dormitorio.  "No esperaba que estuvieras aquí". "......." "No viniste aquí porque querías tener sexo, ¿verdad?"  Noah se apoyó rígidamente en la puerta. Sentada en el borde de la cama, Adele inclinó la cabeza y contestó.  "Tú lo has dicho". "Qué". "¿Qué hay de malo en que un marido entre en la habitación de su mujer.......?"  Adele se agarró el dobladillo del fino slip de encaje que llevaba puesto. La visión le produjo un extraño estremecimiento, como el de una mujer tímida en presencia de su amor no correspondido. Noah se pasó las manos por el pelo largo y suelto. Sintió el contacto y levantó la cabeza para mirarle. Noah estaba de buen humor y sonreía ligeramente. Oh, tal vez no estaba de buen humor, sólo fingía estarlo. Adele estaba a punto de decirle que ya no tenía que fingir, pero entonces escupió otra palabra.  "Necesito preguntarte algo". "Cualquier cosa." "......¿Por qué te casaste conmigo?"  Al oír las palabras de Adele, dejó de pasarse la mano por el pelo castaño claro. Noah se acercó a la mesa y sirvió vino. "También fue bueno para ti". "...... por una razón".  Noah no habló durante mucho tiempo. Adele observó su espalda mientras él sorbía su vino y estaba segura. Otra vez. Se mordió el labio en una miserable confirmación. No podemos cambiar el matrimonio que ya hemos hecho, sino que debemos elegir liberarnos. Adele se tocó el bajo vientre. Noah la observó retorcerse ligeramente y soltó.  "Pareces un niño vendido a un cuartel en una zona de guerra". "¿Es ......?" "Los menores de quince años se abren de piernas en los barracones. En el campo de batalla".  Noah cambió de tema de forma poco natural, pero los ojos de Adele se abrieron de par en par ante las horripilantes palabras.  "¿Así que le abrazaste?" "Maté a ......."  La mano de él, que había estado jugando con el pelo castaño claro de ella, bajó hasta acariciarle la cara blanca. Adele sintió su contacto y acarició su mano ligeramente húmeda. "A cualquiera de mi unidad que retuviera a un niño, yo mismo le cortaba el cuello". "......." "¿Qué clase de hombre está cuerdo para ponerse cachondo al ver a un niño?"  Noah habló en voz baja, tirando hacia atrás de los hilos que sujetaban su cabello castaño claro. El delicioso cabello caía en cascada sobre el rostro impecable de Adele. Siempre estaba impecable con el pelo bien recogido. Pero ahora era diferente. Mi rostro pequeño y denso no podía tener mi edad, y me habría puesto cosas fuera de lugar para preservar la dignidad de mi anfitriona.  "Qué puedo hacer, pareces demasiado joven para estar de pie".  Adele estaba a punto de decirle que no se molestara, que ella lo sabía todo, cuando sus ojos se abrieron de par en par al ver la mitad inferior ligeramente abultada de Noah. Pensé que era todo un acto....... Al parecer, su libido ha subido. Sonrojada, levantó la vista hacia él. Le devolvió la mirada con una suave sonrisa. Con el corazón palpitante, Adele se agarró el pecho. Respondió a sus tartamudeantes palabras con un chasquido.  "No, no es broma, tengo treinta y dos años". "Y era virgen no hace mucho".  Adele se mordió el labio ante el ingenioso comentario. Noah, por su parte, mantenía una sonrisa en el rostro.  "Entonces". "......." "¿Por qué has venido a mi habitación?"  Adele giró la cabeza sin decir palabra. Respiró hondo, como preparándose. “He oído lo que habéis dicho Enon y tú, no hay necesidad de seguir fingiendo", dijo, con las palabras apenas escapando de sus labios. Mientras tanto, Noah le besaba el pelo.  "¿Es una flor de peonía?" "Ah....... Sí. Huele bien". "Es un incienso ardiente, y me dan ganas de levantarme". "Como......."  Adele escupió un suspiro caliente ante aquellas palabras embarazosas. De espaldas a la vela roja, Noah parecía extrañamente alegre. "¿Déjame adivinar?" "¿Qué?" "La parte superior de la familia necesita más dinero, ¿no?" Adele intentó negarse, pero las palabras no le salían. Cuando dudó, Noah se sentó en la cama y le rodeó la cintura con los brazos por detrás. Le rozó la oreja con los labios y luego la nuca.  "Necesito dinero". "......." "Dime, ¿100.000 oros o 1 millón de oros?"  Puedes decirme cualquier cosa....... Su susurro dejó atónita a Adele. Un millón de pesos era suficiente para comprar unas cuantas camisetas. Por supuesto, era calderilla para un hombre cuya familia había sido noble durante generaciones, con título de caballero. Él lo sabía, pero....... Cuando ella negó con la cabeza, Noah le dio un pellizco en la nuca.  "......." "¿Crees que puedes pedir dinero parado así? Tienes que satisfacerme. ¿Eh?"  Noah se rió y frotó su parte inferior contra la de ella. Adele sintió escalofríos al sentir la dura y enorme polla de Noah rozándole el culo. Él aprovechó y la estrechó entre sus brazos. Adele se dio la vuelta y se encontró sentada en la pierna de Noah. Con los ojos medio cerrados, él le tiró de la cara.  "suck......." Chup, debido a la relación que compartía con él, tenía arraigado abrir la boca cuando lo besaba. Sus lenguas se mezclaron y, cuando se separaron un momento, Noah le dedicó una sonrisa de satisfacción.  "Eso es, ahora puedes abrir la boca". "......." "Saca la lengua, te la chuparé". Adele abrió la boca obedientemente y la lengua de Noah se deslizó entre ellas, áspera como un pistón e insistente al mismo tiempo. Ella le agarró los hombros mientras sentía cómo le chupaba y frotaba la lengua.  "Pooh-ha, hoo-ha."  Cuando Adele separó los labios, ahogándose con la respiración, exhaló un aliento caliente y Noah la miró fijamente, sus ojos dorados reflejaban un intenso deseo de violar a una mujer. La espeluznante mirada de él la hizo entrar en pánico y se apretó las comisuras de los ojos. Quiso taparse los ojos, pero el tacto de sus suaves pestañas la detuvo. Siempre destacaban esas largas pestañas.  "¿Por qué?" "......porque es bonito". En lugar de responder, Noah lamió la palma de la mano de Adele. Ella apartó los dedos de un tirón ante la extraña sensación. Esta vez le mordió y le chupó la mano. Luego miró a Adele, que se estremeció.  "Lo que tengo que decir". "......."  La lengua de Noah se deslizó hasta su muñeca, luego bajó hasta tocar el interior de su codo. Un movimiento de la lengua y Adele se mordió el labio. Si él supiera cómo golpear y sacudir como un hombre normal. Él conocía su cuerpo demasiado bien.  "Ah......."  Adele gimió suavemente ante el tenue calor del placer. Noah deslizó la mano dentro de su slip y trazó la curva de su columna vertebral. Al final, le apretó el culo.  "Awww, no me agarres tan fuerte......." "Entonces, ¿por qué no contestas?" "¿Qué?" "¿Qué quieres?"  Normalmente, un hombre se estremecería ante la idea de que su mujer quisiera algo. El hombre que tenía delante no entendía por qué estaba tan excitado. Cuando Adele vaciló, Noah metió la cabeza. Le acarició los pechos turgentes y chupó uno, luego el otro.  "Dímelo". "......." "¿Dinero o joyas?" "......." "Voy a chuparlo hasta que me digas, y luego......."  Noah le acarició el pezón con la punta de la lengua.  "Te vas a hinchar tanto que mañana se te asomarán los pezones por el dobladillo del vestido". "¿Por qué dices eso......." "Cuando los criados lo vean, se harán una paja, pensando: "Oh, la señora ha estado mamando por la noche".  Podía sentir el pene hinchado de Noah entre sus nalgas.  "¡Nadie piensa en eso!" "Eso es lo que hacen los chicos. No conoces a los hombres". "Soy la anfitriona, ¿cómo puedo mirar mi cuerpo y ver......." Con un chasquido, Noah arrancó bruscamente el slip de Adele. Su cuerpo estaba cubierto de las marcas de besos que él le había dejado ayer.  "¿Por qué no pueden ver que tengo un cuerpo que haría que la polla de un hombre se pusiera de punta si lo viera......." "¡Tengo 32 años! Y......." "¿Y?" "Los hombres prefieren una chica como yo....... con estilo y glamour, ¡ejem!"  Las palabras de Adele se vieron interrumpidas por los dedos de Noah, cuya mano presionaba ahora firmemente su clítoris y se frotaba contra su húmedo orificio vaginal.  "Dímelo". "Aang, ahhh, preciosa chica, jo, como, ughhh......." "¿Qué chica en concreto?"  Los frotamientos de Noah eran cada vez más rápidos. Su vagina, regordeta e hinchada por él y por la noche anterior, se estremecía y se humedecía cada vez más.  "Tengo las piernas delgadas y......."  Noah acarició los muslos regordetes de Adele con la otra mano. "De cintura delgada".  La mano que estaba en mi muslo se dirigió a mi cintura, donde sabía bien al tacto.  "Una cara tan elegante......."  Noah acarició con sus largos dedos la redondeada barbilla de Adele. Luego sus mejillas pellizcadas, el puente de su nariz, sus ojos castaños claros, su frente redondeada y sus labios que él quería morder y saborear. No se contuvo más. El sonido de sus labios al encontrarse resonó en la habitación. Adele se quedó quieta y le metió la lengua en la boca. Noah arqueó una ceja y se rió, luego la agarró por la nuca y tiró de ella hacia abajo. "um......." "Esa es la chica que te gusta." "¿Eh?"  Cuando Adele, aturdida y escupiendo media frase, preguntó, Noah le acarició los labios, palma con palma.  "Qué raro, aquí no hay pollas". "¿Qué?......." "¿Qué haces con tus criadas?" "¡Estás diciendo tonterías!"  Adele jadeó, y Noah le dio una palmadita en el trasero con un shhhhh.  "Por alguna razón, las criadas parecen seguirte bien......." "¡Alto!" "¿Cómo se hace entre chicas, con los dedos?"  Noah frotó con fuerza sus labios vaginales con los dedos. Antes de que Adele pudiera resistirse, le metió un dedo.  "¡Ugh! ¡No hagas eso!" "Me preguntó si me divertía con las criadas en vez de contigo". "Tonterías....... Hmph......."  Adele negó con la cabeza y Noah sonrió con satisfacción, deslizando un dedo en su interior. Sacó el dedo justo cuando ella se estremeció de placer al sentir el chisporroteo. Adele parpadeó ante la repentina sensación de inutilidad. Mirando fijamente su agujero palpitante, Noah bajó la cabeza.  "¿Quieres que ponga algo más?" "Detente......." "Como, ¿mi polla?"  Humillada, Adele intenta cerrar las piernas, pero Noah la atrapa y le mete el pene.  "Ja, están todos mojados y rogando por ello, así que ¿qué queda?" "No....... No he venido aquí a decir eso......." "Entonces, ¿qué quieres?"  Noah frotó juguetonamente su grueso pene contra el muslo de Adele.  "Aparte de eso......." "Te preguntaba qué querías realmente". "¡Ajá!" "¿Tal vez tenía otra cosa en mente, Sra. Maktus?"  Noah soltó una risita y Adele, agitada, se incorporó.  "¿Qué quieres realmente?" "......." "Ya que no puedes hablar, ¿es dinero o joyas?" "......."  Noah frunció el ceño al oír el susurro de Adele. "¿Qué?" "Un bebé". "......." "Estoy intentando quedarme embarazada".  El ceño de Noah se frunció ante las palabras de Adele. "Conocí a tu prometida hoy, ¿eh?" "Pero". "Y oí que Enon te pidió que me tomaras....... que te pidió que te responsabilizaras de mí....... Este matrimonio tampoco era algo que quisieras, y......."  Adele se rodeó el estómago con los brazos.  "Tú y yo somos los únicos que sabemos que él-no, Enon-es lisiado. Si tenemos un bebé este mes, podemos engañar a todo el mundo. Eso es lo que....... ¿verdad?" "......." "Lo siento, no me di cuenta que Enon me había pedido que hiciera eso, lo siento mucho, hazlo......."  Adele se cubrió los ojos con las manos, sintiéndose desgraciada. Noah la apartó bruscamente de un tirón. Él pudo ver la furia en sus ojos.  "Sí. Mi hermano me lo pidió y ahora me acuerdo".  Adele frunció el ceño y Noah se incorporó con rigidez.  "¿Por qué me preguntaste por qué me casé?" "Es ......."  Noah sonrió con maldad, aparentemente enfadado por alguna razón. Adele sintió un escalofrío al verle. El dormitorio que había sido tan cálido hacía unos momentos parecía frío. Noah la abrazó y le susurró al oído.  "Quería cometer un crimen". "¡......!" "Mi inocente hermano, que siempre fue tan estoico". Adele intentó ahuyentarlo con un comentario grosero. Pero Noah no la soltó. En lugar de eso, le arrancó el slip.  "Me pareció un derroche de locura que monopolizaras un cuerpo tan erótico".  Noah acarició lentamente el vientre blanco de Adele.  "Así que decidí, voy a hacerla mi chica, y me voy a correr encima de ella". "......." "Porque de todas formas no puedes".  La mano que tenía en el vientre subió y le agarró el pecho con fuerza. Adele jadeó al sentir la sensación de calor contra su pecho. Mirándolo, Noah rió entre dientes y volvió a susurrar.  "Quizá tú también lo querías". "¿Qué, qué quieres decir?" "Qué duro debe haber sido vivir con un marido chivato".  Adele pensó en las noches que había pasado con Enon. Siendo ella misma humana, a menudo deseaba tener sexo. Un día, se armó de valor para agarrarle por el cuello y decirle que lo deseaba. Pero él no lo vio así y la insultó, diciendo que era una decepción y una zorra. Por supuesto, al día siguiente se disculpó entre lágrimas. Después de eso, no nos mencionamos el sexo implícitamente y vivimos como una pareja normal. Como una pareja normal....... Adele negó enérgicamente con la cabeza. No, nunca se me había puesto dura, sólo era sexo, estaba bien sin él, ¡no había hecho nada para avergonzar al pobre hombre! Mientras gritaba las palabras de negación en su cabeza, su mente se remontó a aquella noche de otoño de hacía un año. Con el pecho agitado por la culpa, empujó a Noah con más fuerza. Él no cedió, pero Adele no se dio por vencida y mantuvo la mano sobre él.  "¡No me insultes!" "Qué quieres decir, sólo decía lo que quería decir, la verdad que incluso tú ocultabas". "......Creo que deberías divorciarte inmediatamente si te quedas embarazada, porque no te casaste porque quisieras.......".  Adele giró la cabeza para evitar la mirada acalorada de Noah.  "¿Divorcio?"  Noah enarcó una ceja.  "Usted realmente....... Tienes un don para joder a la gente, ¿verdad, señora Maktus?" "Probablemente también sea bueno para ti, porque si se corriera la voz de que 'realmente' estás casada con tu hermano, podrías perder algo de prestigio". "Yo tomo esa decisión, no tú".  Las firmes palabras de Noah dejaron sin habla a Adele, que rápidamente escupió las palabras que había escuchado la noche anterior.  "Tú eras la que quería un bebé". "Sí. Lo quiero, así que abre las piernas". "......." "Dijiste que querías tener un bebé, ¿no?"  Noah siguió tirando de su cintura. Su pene hinchado le presionaba la vagina. Ella trató de retroceder, sabiendo que se deslizaría dentro y se haría un lío. Antes de que pudiera, Noah la agarró con fuerza por la pelvis y frotó su polla contra ella.  "Sra. Maktus, ¿alguna vez ha querido tener un bebé?" "¡Ya basta!" "Entonces abre las piernas". "......." "Lo llenaré."  Antes de que Adele pudiera decir nada, se produjo un áspero beso. Noah la agarró por la barbilla y le impidió girar la cabeza, obligándola a continuar el beso. Su áspera lengua exploró cada centímetro de su boca mientras introducía su furioso pene en su vagina. ¡Pum! "¡Argh!"  Por suerte, mi vagina aún estaba húmeda por mis caricias anteriores.  "Levanta el culo. Mete mi polla ahí". "Oye, no hagas esto". "Te dejaré embarazada si quieres. Son muchas palabras".  Las manos de Noah tiraron de la pelvis de Adele hacia arriba. En un instante, sus caderas se elevaron y su cara quedó presionada contra la cama, y ella se mordió el labio avergonzada por la posición. ¡Ay, si esto acabara de una vez! Adele no sabía por qué estaba enfadado, ni cuáles eran sus verdaderas intenciones, pero quería que aquello terminara. Noah la agarró por la pelvis y empezó a penetrarla. Era muy brusco, a diferencia de las noches anteriores, en las que le había pinchado suavemente el revestimiento de la vagina. Sin embargo, el duro roce y el pinchazo de los puntos de excitación hicieron que todo el cuerpo de Adele se calentara.  "Cintura más alta". "¡Ugh!"  La mano de Noah presionó el bajo vientre de Adele. "Voy a envolverlo para que sólo contenga mi semen, así que no saques el culo".  Con un chasquido, la mano de Noah abofeteó su flaco trasero. No le dolió, pero fue muy humillante. Adele se mordió el labio y enterró la cara en las sábanas.  "¡Ugh!"  La enorme polla golpeó contra sus paredes internas, eyaculando libremente, y un estremecimiento de placer comenzó a extenderse por las piernas de Adele. Cuando sus piernas cedieron y bajó las caderas, Noah volvió a darle una palmada en el culo.  "Señora, ¿es por esto que tendrá a mi hijo?"  Adele agitó los brazos. Al mismo tiempo, Noah sacó el pene de su agujero y volvió a introducirlo en un movimiento fluido, y ella gritó por la sensación de vértigo.  "¡Hmph!" "¿Qué pasa si no puedo ponerme manos a la obra?".  La palma de la mano de Noah golpeó sus nalgas y Adele, naturalmente, se tensó hacia abajo. Read the full article

[hisbel]

Quizá hoy es un día en el que no le encuentro sentido a las cosas. Hoy me doy cuenta de que estoy estudiando algo que no me hará feliz. Trabajaré en algo que seguramente me de dinero pero no lo haré bien porque no estoy aprendiendo todo lo que aprendería si me encantase el temario. Aunque supongo que aunque me encante tendré días de mierda, como ayer, como hoy, como antesdeayer, como todos los días desde hace tiempo. 

Sería mucho más horrible perderle el gusto a algo a lo que siempre se lo has tenido. Cuando te obligan a estudiar es lo que pasa ¿no?

Entonces prefiero perderle el gusto a algo por lo que nunca sentí pasión. Pero sé que el plan es vagar por la vida tranquilamente sin esforzarme demasiado en el trabajo y subsistir en un letargo estable y bajo, como las pulsaciones de alguien que está en coma. 

Supongo que no sé cuál es mi destino. Estoy algo perdida y tiendo a ser pesimista, aunque hoy haya agradecido. 

Me siento sola y sin ganas de hacer nada. Nada me motiva, me autoimpongo que no puedo moverme y me quedo inmóvil. En realidad ¡podría hacer tantísimas cosas! Incluso siendo pobre.

También estoy preocupada por el tema del dinero, básicamente porque no tengo nada. Se me acaban los porros, mi única salida en el camino del aburrimiento y la soledad. 

¿Debería pedirle a un médico que me recetase ansiolíticos? 

Quizá no porque lo primero en lo que pienso es en tomarme la caja entera y dejar de preocuparme por lo negro que veo el futuro.

La vida es un castigo extremadamente aburrido, 

la vida para mí es la tortura de la gota. 

Una gota de agua que no cesa de caer en un mismo punto de la piel, donde poco a poco va deshaciendo la piel hasta verse el hueso, donde el torturado acaba muriendo de desesperación (no es una muerte biológica, es una muerte psicológica y eso es lo más interesante).

También estoy cansada de que mi cerebro sea estúpido y esté interesado en cosas superfluas que no me ayudan en nada, como por ejemplo en gustarle a tal chico al que sé que no le gusto (dejando claramente entrever que soy tremendamente gilipollas y que me encanta perder el tiempo en pensamientos que no me van a hacer ser mejor persona). 

¿Debería pedirle a un médico que me recetase ansiolíticos? 

Por favor, que me seden. 

Estos días en los que no tengo fuerza para seguir y solo quisiera estar muy quieta, enterrada a dos metros del suelo, tan dormida que pareciese muerta.

Estos días literalmente no puedo levantarme. (Aunque valoramos que lo hemos hecho y aquí estamos, escribiendo desde el portátil en clase de programación, en vez de estar atenta a las explicaciones del profesor, dando por perdida la materia).

Necesito irme de aquí, el día se está haciendo muy largo. No vamos ni por una quinta parte de éste y siento la desesperación enorme, de esa que hace que la gente se tire del pelo y se balancee sentado abrazándose en el suelo. 

Asumo que tengo que entrenar porque no me gusta mi cuerpo. Cada vez más gorda, ya no me caben los pantalones que me cupieron antaño y hace dos días, cuando fui a comprar ropa nueva, me di cuenta que habíamos subido una talla más. Por ahí si que no paso. 

Perdí el gorro negro y la botella de agua. Podría ser peor. Podría haber perdido el altavoz. Pero... ese gorro negro me quedaba muy bien y era de mi abuelo. 

Mi abuelo a quien, por cierto, no he visto estas navidades. Nadie lo ha nombrado, nadie lo ha invitado. Parece que ya esté muerto. 

Nadie va ya a verlo a la residencia.

Me siento también como una mierda por eso. 

Merezco todo lo que tengo, desde luego. Y no sé cómo empezar para cambiarlo todo. No sé por qué pieza del engranaje empezar para cambiar de sentido la maquinaria. 

Sé que debería empezar por dejar de fumar pero es lo único que quiero hacer ahora. Tomarme 5 diazepanes, fumarme un porro e irme a dormir. No puedo más. No puedo más.. No puedo más. 

[svtfoe-starsandroses]

si tom y star tienen un tercer hijo ¿como se llamaría? y ¿como seria su relación con sus hermanos?

Tengo varios nombres pero todavía no decido bien cuál jsjs

Ah pues Aiden y Serena se asombraron y alegraron mucho cuando supieron que Tom y Star iban a tener otro bebé pero como él nene nace cuando sus hermanos mayores están en sus 20s y gobernando sus reinos su relación con sus hermanos es distinta.

Al vivir en el castillo Butterfly convive más tiempo con su hermana Serena, no juegan mucho juntos pero sí hablan mucho y ella ayuda a cuidarlo, criarlo y educarlo para que se convierta en un buen príncipe, aunque en ocasiones su hermana le gusta romper las reglas y consentirlo de más.

De hecho Serena se tarda un poco en ser mamá por dedicar mucho tiempo a gobernar su reino y a sobre proteger a los que quiere (sobre todo a su hermano menor) pero cuando por fin se da cuenta que tal vez los malos tiempos ya acabaron, que ya no debería sentir temor y que sería bueno empezar a dedicarse tiempo a ella misma y casarse con el amor de su vida Serena termina teniendo muchos hijos porque por cuidar de su hermano desde que era bebé le gustó mucho "la maternidad" y con ello en el fondo sintió mucha ilusión de tener sus propios hijos algún día.

Por otro lado, Aiden sí se casó pronto al volverse rey y tiene a una bebé poco después de eso y como vive y gobierna el Inframundo no convive tanto con su hermano como Serena.

Lamentablemente por un tiempo nuestro rey Lucitor lidia con problemas personales y también de su reino, pero busca la manera de convivir con su hija y también con su hermano pequeño porque a pesar de que fueran a estar algo apartados Aiden cuando supo que sus padres tendrían otro hijo tenía el deseo de también ser alguien cercano a su hermano menor como lo fue con su hermana. Es por eso que el rey Lucitor en ocasiones va al castillo Butterfly para visitar a su hermano pequeño y también a los demás integrantes de su familia.

Cuando los dos hijos Lucitor-Butterfly juegan juntos se divierten mucho. Además de que Aiden con el tiempo le enseña a su hermano a hacer varias de las actividades divertidas y alocadas que él hacía cuando era un muchacho, sobre todo ahora que su padre Thomas Lucitor ya no es tan joven para hacerlo (Tom y Star están en sus 40s cuando tienen a su tercer hijo).

A Aiden por suerte se le da muy bien jugar y divertirse tanto con su hija como con su hermano, aunque lo haga con ambos por separado. Puede ser porque al no tener hijos varones puede convivir y compartir con su hermano menor sus pasatiempos antiguos en totalidad.

[lyon-amore]

Quédate a mi lado 2 final

Parte 1 ------------------------- Veo a Ashley examinando a Jake, mientras no paro de morderme las uñas. Conocía a Ashley, era una tía legal. La verdad es que ninguno de la banda de Stephan era mala persona, él no quería malos rollos o gente problemática. Quizás por eso siempre estaba rodeado de gente tan amigable. Era un imán con ellos.   —Stephan nos ha dado un buen susto a Susy y a mí cuando nos ha llamado —comenta, mientras examina a Jake.   —Lo siento mucho —le contesto, sintiéndome mal por haberlas preocupado por mi culpa—, es que no sabía a quién acudir.   — ¿Quizás a un hospital? —Su tono es de decepción conmigo— Al menos, la herida está bien cosida ¿Qué es lo que ha pasado?   —Bueno contestando a la primera pregunta, sí que ha estado en el hospital —miento, con calma—, sólo que le ha subido ahora la fiebre. Y la segunda pregunta… Es policía, así que en una redada le dispararon.    —Qué chungo, tía —responde, terminando de examinarle—. Espera, pensé que los policías no te iban. Ya sabes, por tu padre y lo que le pasó.    —Ya, supongo que las cosas cambian.     Recoge todo y me mira frunciendo el ceño.    — ¿Seguro que no le has disparado tú?    — ¡Por Dios, Ashley! —evito gritar alto, ofendida.    —Es broma, te creo —ríe por lo bajo—. He visto cómo le estabas mirando mientras le examinaba, yo también me preocupo con Susy cuando quiere irse sola a escalar montañas. Siempre le preparo un botiquín cuando se va sin mí.    —Es que si le pierdo… No sé qué es lo que haría…     Ashley me abraza con cariño, suspirando.  Vuelvo a llorar, devolviéndola el abrazo. Esto es difícil para mí. Pero tengo claro que pasaría cualquier cosa con tal de estar con él. Le acompaño a la entrada y me mira tranquila.    —Si la fiebre vuelve a subir, dale un paracetamol, cada ocho horas —me explica—, aunque me gustaría más que le llevaras al hospital, Macie, estaría mejor cuidado allí.    —No, está bien —sonrío intentando mantener la calma—, no me voy a ir a ningún sitio, así que le voy a cuidar todo el tiempo que necesite.    —Aún no me has dicho cómo se llama tu Romeo.    —No le gusta que le diga su nombre a gente que no conoce —continúo mintiendo—, es un poco reservado.    —Está bien-    —Y… ¿Podrías no decirle a la gente que tengo a un hombre en mi casa? —veo como frunce el ceño y suelto una pequeña risa— Es que no llevamos mucho tiempo saliendo —me muerdo el interior de la mejilla, incómoda por haber metido a otra persona en esto— y de momento no quiero que nadie lo sepa.    —Mi boca está cerrada con cremallera —hace un gesto como si la cerrase y  luego me sonríe—. Mucha suerte con él, Macie.    —Gracias, Ashley.    Nos despedimos y cierro la puerta con llave.  Suelto un largo suspiro y regreso al cuarto con Jake. Me vuelvo a tumbar a su lado comprobando su temperatura. Todavía estaba caliente.    —Esperemos que por la mañana estés bien… —murmuro, volviendo a coger su mano como antes.     Esta vez estaré más atenta de que no vuelva a levantarse de nuevo. Me despierto con la vibración del móvil en la mesita. Stephan.    — ¿Diga? —contesto en voz baja, no queriendo despertar a Jake.    — ¿Cómo fue? ¿Estás mejor?    —Sí, estoy mejor.     Me levanto despacio de la cama sin molestarle. Salgo del cuarto y me apoyo en la pared.    — ¿Qué te pasó? Me asustaste muchísimo.    —Estos días han sido duros —contesto siendo sincera ahora—, ya sabes por qué.    —Ah, ya, fuiste a Duskwood porque te llamaron de la comisaría ¿no?    —Sí… Y eso me ha puesto enferma, regresé encontrándome muy mal —momento de mentir ahora.    —Pero se aclaró todo ¿verdad? —suena preocupado. Stephan, aunque sea mi primo, es como un hermano para mí. Así que entiendo su preocupación— Le dijiste al FBI que no tenías nada que ver con ese tipo, ¿verdad?    —Claro, todo lo que se ha dicho de mí es mentira, así que no te preocupes.    —Me alegra saberlo —suspira y suelta una risa—. Porque vamos ¿tú? ¿Metida en temas de investigación de nuevo? ¿Y con un hacker? Eso es como la trama de una película.    —Ridículo, ¿verdad? —suelto una risa, mentirle me duele, siempre nos hemos contado todo. Salvo esto. Como a Lian. He mentido a todos los que he querido. Pero era lo correcto.    —Bueno, tengo que colgar —suena ahora exasperado—, Soph quiere que vayamos pronto al restaurante a reunirnos con unos empresarios de moda. Va a promocionar su marca.     —De acuerdo, adiós Stephan y suerte con ello.     —Gracias, la voy a necesitar. Adiós, prima.      Cuelgo y vuelvo al cuarto. Jake sigue dormido. Envío un mensaje a Lian para que me traiga a Henry. No puedo marcharme y dejar a Jake solo. Le explico que no me encuentro bien porque han sido días estresantes y he acabado un poco enferma. En seguida acepta, preocupada.  Me siento en la silla y acaricio el pelo de Jake. Se le ve tranquilo durmiendo. Dijo que no había dormido desde el año pasado ¿quizás por eso está tan agotado que no despierta? Debería preparar algo para comer para cuando se despierte. Necesita recuperar energía.   Al cabo de media hora, Lian me trae a Henry en su jaula. Le dejo suelto por la casa, aunque prefirió seguirme hasta la cocina. Parece un perrito en vez de un conejo. Pasan las horas y aún Jake no se despierta. Ni siquiera yo he comido porque quiero que primero despierte. No tengo apetito por estar preocupada.   Son las ocho de la tarde y todavía sigue durmiendo… Me pongo de rodillas en la cama, cogiendo su mano. Evito llorar esta vez, esperanzada de que de repente abra los ojos y no me vea en este estado. Henry se queda a mi lado, durmiendo acorrucado. Le sonrío al verle y de nuevo miro a Jake.    —Vamos Jake… Abre los ojos…     ¿Y si está en coma? Oh, Dios, no… Por favor, que no lo esté, no sabría qué hacer entonces. Tiene que estar bien. Seguro.    —He pensado en ir a Duskwood de nuevo —intento hablarle para que me escuchara, quizás así reaccionaba—, todavía no he tenido tiempo de ir al Bar Aurora, Phil aún me debe una copa.     Bromeo, sabiendo que no le cae bien Phil. Quizás así despierta.    —Dan quiere que vea con él una película —de nuevo, intento buscar su reacción— y como me gusta las de terror, he pensado que sería una buena idea… Los dos solos ¿Qué te parece?     Nada. No hay reacción. Suelto aire cargado, colocando mi cabeza en la cama. Aprieto con fuerza la mano de Jake. No quería llorar, pero lo hago. Hacía años que yo lloraba desde el accidente de coche. Creo que empecé a llorar de nuevo tras el vídeo de Jake contándome la verdad. Desde entonces, no he podido parar de hacerlo. Lo siguiente fue cuando Jake me dijo que iría a las minas en mi lugar. Lloré por ello. Porque me esperaba que sucedería algo horrible. Y como no, sucedió. Yo también quería protegerle en ese momento, de no exponerse a ser descubierto. Y mira cómo estamos ahora.    —Jake, juro que si no despiertas haré una locura —amenazo, probando también con eso—. Por favor… Despierta… Aunque sea por cinco minutos…    Las diez de la noche. No tengo hambre. No tengo sueño. Tan sólo sigo esperando a que despierte. Casi ni siento las piernas por estar de rodillas durante mucho tiempo. Me incorporo despacio, sentándome en la cama. Acaricio su cara, viendo cómo respiraba muy despacio. Compruebo su temperatura. Al menos, ya le ha bajado la fiebre.    —Sólo espero que de repente no empeores —digo entre dientes, enfadada conmigo misma por haberle dejado ir a aquella mina ¿Por qué le hice caso? Podría haber ido sin problemas ¡Mira cómo está ahora!—, porque no podría soportar la idea de perderte. Me gusta tu idea de querer llevarme a un buen restaurante, pero para mí, me da igual como si es uno pequeño. Me da igual no ir elegantes, quiero tan sólo estar contigo, es lo único que más quiero —vuelvo a llorar… No quiero… No quiero pero no puedo controlarme—. Me dijiste que no ibas a permitir que te separarían de mí.    Me inclino colocando mi frente pegada en la de él. Trago saliva, buscando las palabras adecuadas.    —Quiero que me digas ‘Te amo’ —susurro—, no quiero que lo hagas haciendo bromas para tranquilizarme, lo necesito. Dime ‘Te amo. Me pondré bien. Estaré a tu lado’. Quiero que puedas abrazarme, quiero que todo lo prometido lo cumplas, porque siempre he confiado en ti, Jake. No sólo tú puedes decir que cambiaste de opinión al conocerme, porque ya no preferías la soledad. Yo pensé que estaría también sola porque no había nadie con quien pudiera conectar tan bien, pero llegaste a mi vida. Aguantaste mis enfados, que me expresara con total sinceridad hacia ti, sin molestarte. Al igual que yo, que acepté que no te importasen mis amigos hasta que los llegaste a conocerles. Acepté tus defectos y tú los míos.     Froto mi nariz con la suya, mientras noto como tiemblan mis labios. Estoy nerviosa. Tengo miedo. No quiero volver a pasar por perder a alguien a quien quiero, no volverá a pasar.    —Te amo, Jake… Despierta, por favor…     Aproximo mis labios a los de él. Dejando un pequeño beso en sus labios. Al separarme, veo cómo empieza a moverse los ojos, abriéndolos despacio. Me quedo callada, llevando mis manos a la boca evitando gritar de alegría. Gira despacio la cabeza y me mira, sonriendo débilmente.    —Buenos… Días…    —Buenas noches, más bien —contesto, secándome las lágrimas de la cara.    — ¿Estás llorando?    —Sí… Lo siento, estaba tan preocupada que-    —Estoy bien, Macie —intenta incorporarse, pero le detengo—. Quería abrazarte…    —Pues tendrás que esperar para que puedas moverte correctamente.    — ¿Puedo al menos abrazarte tumbado?    Sonrío asintiendo, tumbándome a su lado. Pasa su brazo por mi cuerpo, colocándola en mi cintura. Su otra mano aparte el cabello de mi cara, para verme mejor. Su sonrisa, aunque sea un poco de dolor, es de felicidad. Me besa la frente y luego en la mejilla. Espero que no sepa que le besé en los labios, pensaría que me aproveché de su estado.    —No vuelvas a hacerme esto jamás… —le digo, acurrucándome a su lado— No puedes asustarme de esta manera, Jake, lo tienes prohibido.    —Pensaba que te gustaba el terror.    —Bueno sí, pero en vida real-... —me quedo callada, analizando lo que había dicho— Perdona, pero… ¿lo preguntas por el ‘Dark Mystery Forum’ o por algún caso en especial?    —‘Phil aún me debe una copa.’ —Trata de imitar mi voz y me sonrojo—  ‘Dan quiere que vea con él una película de terror’.    — ¡¿Estabas despierto?! —me incorporo de golpe, llevándome una mano a los labios. Porque si eso lo ha escuchado. TODO lo que he dicho, entonces…     Sé que intenta sonreír de manera maliciosa, pero no puede. En cambio, se ríe de manera débil. Me tapo la cara avergonzada. Nunca antes me habían hecho pasar tanta vergüenza como ahora.    —Te amo, Macie.    —No, no te mereces decírmelo ahora… Mentiroso —digo enfadada, pero no en serio—. Yo preocupada por ti y tú fingiendo estar dormido ¡Esto no se hace!    —No fingía, tan sólo me costaba un poco despejarme del todo.    —Sí, claro…     Henry se sube a la cama, acercándose a Jake.    —Así que este es Henry —dice mientras deja que le huela la mano, para luego acariciarlo.    —Sí, mi pequeño Henry —miro la escena con una sonrisa. Era bastante tierno.     Jake me mira y sonríe. Le devuelvo la sonrisa.    —Por cierto… —comienza a decir.    — ¿Sí?    —Sigo diciendo que eres una pésima enfermera.    —Oh, vamos ¿no te he curado bien? —pongo los ojos en blanco, cruzándome de brazos— creo que lo he hecho todo perfecto como para no soportar la sangre.    —Me refiero porque una enfermera no debe de aprovecharse de un enfermo y besarle ¿no crees?     Miro a otro lado, evitando mirarlo a la cara. No. No voy a caer en eso. No voy a confesar.    —Macie…    —No es cierto, no te he besado.    — ¿Dónde está la Macie que me hacía sonrojar por mensajes?     No quiero admitir que mi orgullo se ha ido por los suelos en el instante que le tengo de frente y que me ha vuelto débil su presencia.     —No estoy enfadado —continúa, cogiéndome la mano para así dejar de estar cruzada de brazos—. Tan sólo molesto.    —Perdona, no fue de verdad mi intención —contesto, intentando verle directamente a los ojos—, estaba muy preocupada por ti y tan sólo quería-    —Molesto porque no estaba tan desvelado como para devolverte el beso.     Intento calmarme tras escuchar sus palabras.  Jake nunca me decepciona cuando habla. Le sonrío y veo cómo besa mi mano. Todo un caballero. Me derrito en ese momento, viendo que sus labios tiene una pequeña sonrisa.    —Vas a tener que quedarte una temporada aquí, al menos hasta que te cures — comento y me mira, entrelazando sus dedos con los míos—, lo que implica, que nada de hackeos, ni huidas, cero móviles.    — ¿Quieres decir que es seguro estar aquí?    —Digamos que… sólo una persona sí que sabe que estás aquí —frunce el ceño e intento calmarlo—. Era una médico, Jake, y de confianza. No podía dejarte sin examinarte ¿Lo entiendes?    — ¿Qué historia le has contado?    —Que te he disparado para retenerte en mi casa —suelta una risa y continúo—. Le he dicho que eres policía y que esa herida de bala es por tu trabajo.    —Pero no dirá nada ¿Verdad? Ni mi nombre.    — ¿Acaso no sabes con quién estás hablando? —alzo una ceja con una sonrisa de orgullo— A los periodistas nos encanta a veces mentir para que la gente acepté nuestra opinión como única y válida. Claro que no he dicho nada, puedes continuar confiando en mí.     Suspira aliviado y vuelvo a tumbarme a su lado. Todo estaba en calma de nuevo. Me acaricia la mejilla con mucho cuidado, como si fuera yo la que estuviera herida. Bajando despacio a mis labios, trazándolos con cuidado con el pulgar.     —Gracias, Macie —susurra y su voz profunda hace que sienta escalofríos por todo el cuerpo—, no creo que hubiera otra persona en que le pudiera haber puesto mi vida en sus manos.    —Ya, bueno, tienes suerte que te ame como para aguantar ver toda esa sangre.    —Entonces he tenido suerte de que lo hagas.    —Sí… Pero por favor, no vuelvas a ponerte en riesgo de esta forma ¿Vale? —suplico, con la voz quebrada— El sólo imaginarme por un segundo que no pudieras volver conmigo, me ha hecho replantearme morirme contigo.    —No digas eso-    —Lo digo en serio, Jake, nunca antes me había enamorado de esta forma —confieso, apretando con fuerza su mano, con miedo a que se volviera a levantar y a marcharse asustado por mis palabras—. No sabes cuánto he sufrido desde que no supe nada más de ti tras ese mensaje. Asustada porque te hubieras marchado de mi lado…    —Lo siento, ángel —no puedo evitar que me encante ese apodo que me había puesto. Una sonrisa se escapó por mis labios al escucharla, emocionada. Y él lo sabe porque también me lo confirma con una sonrisa—, no voy a volver a preocuparte de esta manera. Pero ya te lo dije: No me iban a separar de ti, y lo he cumplido. Aquí estoy, a tu lado. Y jamás permitiré que ni yo mismo me separe de ti. No ahora que por fin estás en mis brazos. Te amo, Macie. En ti pondré siempre mi vida, pase lo que pase.     ¿Por qué siempre sabe cómo decir las palabras exactas? Mi corazón se acelera tanto que parece que se vaya a salir del pecho. Coloca su mano detrás de mí nuca y me atrae a él. Su manera de besarme, lenta, cuidadosa, hace que sea como éxtasis para todo mi cuerpo. Nunca había probado la droga, pero estaba segura de que debía de ser esto, porque se había convertido en mi nueva adicción.  Con la mano libre, coloco mi mano en su pecho, sintiendo su corazón. Latía muy rápido, al igual que el mío, lo que causaba felicidad en mí por saber que estaba bien. Noto cómo el peso de la cama es diferente, como si quisiera moverse. Entonces, se queja y paro de besarlo.    —Será mejor no hacer nada durante un tiempo —comento entre risas—, ¿No querrás que se te abran los puntos por qué está enfermera se aproveche de ti?    —Odio estar herido… —se queja, poniendo cara de molestia— No era así como había planeado nuestro encuentro. De verdad que lo siento.    —Estás vivo, es lo que importa.     Cierro los ojos abrazándolo. Me planta un beso en la frente y sonrío. Henry se acurruca a los pies de la cama y se queda dormido en segundos. Tampoco era como yo lo tenía planeado, pero había ocurrido. Aun así, era la mujer más feliz del mundo, porque por fin había conocido al hombre que más me había hecho feliz. Confiaba en su palabra de que ya no le iban a separar de mí.     —Iba en broma de que irías al bar Aurora la próxima vez que fueras a Duskwood ¿Verdad?    —Buenas noches Jake.    —Macie-    —Sí, lo sé, estás agotado.    — ¿Debo al menos preocuparme?     Le planto un pequeño beso en los labios, con una sonrisa maliciosa.    —No tienes competencia alguna, eso es imposible.    —Me alegra saberlo.

[aaveafanfics]

¡¡SOY LA FANGIRL!! ¡¡HABLEMOS DE ESTE FANFIC!!

Si ya sé, no he subido ningún fic durante unos días, pero tengo una buena excusa. Los fics que leí durante ese tiempo, sinceramente no fueron buenos, ni pa decir: "miren lean esto por aburrimiento". Es que eran bastante complicados de entender porque estaban mal escritos y de tal forma que se hace imposible disfrutar la trama, pero bueno, sigamos con nuestra programación habitual.

Fandom: Avatar la leyenda de Aang.

Pareja: Zutara.

Idioma: Inglés (Usa traductor de Chrome)

Categoría: Línea alternativa+FutureAU

Sinópsis por mi: Katara empezó a tener sueños (más bien pesadillas) que la hacían sentir culpable y arrepentida por el futuro que veía en ellos, tras seis meses de sufrimiento, Katara emprende un viaje al polo norte, pero algo dentro de ella le pide ir a la nación del fuego, en dónde un par de consejos del tío Iroh y una misión con su Zuko le ayudarán a entender lo que tratan de decirle sus sueños.

Calificación: 💙💙💙💙

Sinceramente, me atragante con este fic, me lo leí muy rápido (no es muy largo tampoco) y Diooooos, me emputa Aang, porque si es un fic, pero conociendo las actitudes del canon hay algunas cosas que Aang si que haría y eso se presenta en este fic. El día lunes un amigo y yo estábamos hablando de la serie y justo topamos el tema de las ships, yo le conté que me había vuelto a ver la serie recientemente y de cómo me di cuenta de que habían cuatro puntos de inflexión en la relación de Katara y Zuko. Lo que me dijo mi amigo fue: "Aang solo se quedó con Katara porque es el protagonista" ¡¡y puta madre es cierto!! La única vez que Katara desmuestra genuino interés por Aang es cuando bailan en la cueva de la nación del fuego y tampoco fue un momento que digas, wow, que conexión ¿qué tiene que ver con esto? Pues así me sentí al leer este fic, porque hablando mucho de cómo Katara dejó de ser ella al quedarse con Aang y te lo dejan claro en Korra. Cómo sea, me quejaré de esto en otro blog.

Súper recomendado.

[aquel-amor-que-no-pudo-ser]

Estos son los escritos que he hecho a lo largo del mes cuento te he extrañado y sentido que ya no puedo más:

19-07-2021 12:14 p.m.

Sabes hace un par de meses pensé que había llegado ese momento en el que ya no te volvería a soñar pero me doy cuenta que aún lo hago, que aún estás presentes en mis sueños y la verdad es que aún te pienso y eso lo sabes, si no, no escribiría tanto sobre ti , lo bueno es que esa sensación de desesperación por ser yo esa persona especial ya se ha ido o por lo menos ya una parte, porque me doy cuenta que a veces si está esa sensación e intento evadirla, sabes quiero volver a verte en fotos, recuerdos o en lo que sea pero me da tanto miedo verte feliz a lado de ella y solo me detengo y no avanzo debería de avanzar pero no sé qué sucede, pensé que este mes no escribiría sobre ti pero mira aquí estoy y a veces pienso que quizás el escribirte no me ayuda a soltarte pero es la única forma de sentirme mejor, de sentir que alguien me escucha y que al querer contarlo no se me entrecorta la voz queriendo decir lo que siento, llevo dos días soñando contigo y pues la verdad no me sienta bien pues quiero que desaparezcas de mi memoria pero no lo logro hacer, a veces me pregunto porque sigo escribiendo de ti, al principio sabia que era para que me leas por si algún día regresas luego me di cuenta que quizás ya nunca regreses y después supe que aún así regreses ya no será lo mismo, ya no podré mostrarte los escritos que te escribí cuando te necesite o que te escribo porque aún escribo para ti y no sé cuando parara esto, la verdad no sé nada de ti e incluso no te he visto desde hace mucho y no sabes cuánto te extraño pero aún tengo esa costumbre de querer encontrarte en el cielo, cada que te extraño y no puedo escribir o no quiero porque a veces siento que me pone triste hacerlo, cada que te extraño te busco en el cielo y no sabes la paz que me da, es la misma que sentía cuando estaba junto a ti, veo el cielo y es tan hermoso y verlo así de hermoso me recuerda a ti pues siempre he dicho vienes de allí, eres ese ángel que me ayudo en mi momento más infeliz se podría decir y siempre me pregunto porque no veía el cielo cuando estaba junto a ti, quizás tú eras ese cielo, siempre en algún momento de mi día te recuerdo y me pongo a pensar si tú lo haces pero supongo que ya no y está bien pues hay alguien más en tu vida y la verdad ella se merece toda tu atención, al principio la verdad que me moria por ser tú todo pero sé que está ella y aunque a veces aún me duele quiero lo mejor para ambos, en serio me duele pensar en verlos juntos o algo parecido pero aún así quiero lo mejor, quiero que les vaya bien y que se quieran y amen bien, que no comentan los mismos errores que algún día cometimos juntos y en especial que no se dejen ir, que ambos luchen uno por el otro y que tengan un amor lindo, aveces imagino que te digo todo esto en personal y quizás si lo hiciera no creerías nada de mis palabras o pensarías que soy una hipócrita pero la verdad es que todo lo que digo es sincero, a veces pienso en buscar u escribirte pero no sé qué pretendería con eso pues para un amor juntos ya no hay tiempo y para una amistad supongo que nos iría mal y bueno también está ella no quiero herirla pues creo que todos pensaría mal si nos ven juntos así sea por amistad así que mantengo mi distancia y te deseo lo mejor desde lejos.

31-07-2021 19:16 am

Sin darme cuenta ya estamos por cumplir otro mes sin vernos, aunque bueno hoy te escribo porque te volví a ver, no sé si tú lo hiciste pero yo te logré verte hoy, realmente no tengo la Puta idea de si me viste o no, pero sé que yo si o al menos lo intente ya sabes no tengo buena vista y por si lo habías olvidado te lo recuerdo, hoy después de tanto volví a verte desde lejos pero lo volví a hacer, después de 8 meses y se siente raro porque puedo pensar que antes éramos todo y ahora ya no somos nada, somos dos personas que entre más alejadas estén es mejor, te vi y recordé todo de ti, recordé un millón de momentos juntos, luego veía tú casa y podía decir yo he estado ahí y ahora quizás ni soy bienvenida, pasarán un montón de recuerdos por mi cabeza y me volvieron esas ganas inmensa de buscarte, de llamarte para saber cómo estás y para poder escucharte y que tú me escuche, te extrañe tanto en ese momento y te extraño tanto ahora pero ya sé que ya todo es distinto y sé que es mejor estar alejados, mientras pensaba en nosotros me di cuenta que tenemos una vida casi igual pero eso no justifica que seamos él uno para el otro o que nuestra vida iba a ser perfecta estando juntos porque no lo fue, ni lo será, todo lo que escribir en un principio era falso porque solo era un deseo o algo parecido porque nos idealizaba a ambos y puede que aún lo haga pero ya lo sé ya lo entendí, que no somos, ni podemos ser y por más que yo quiera o tenga sentimientos de por medio sé que tengo que dejarlos ir, tengo que soltar para poder seguir aunque no quiera aunque me…

2/08/2021 09:56 am

Supongo que agosto nunca es mi mes, auqnue quería que este mes si lo fuera, oye en serio intento olvidarte pero no puedo y muero de miedo de volver a verte, sé que estás siendo feliz, lo sé muy bien y no quiero que esa felicidad se te acabe, no sabes cuánto me duele eso pero es lo que le pido a Dios, y supongo que cada uno a nuestro tiempo, después de tanto se cumplió mi sueño, ese sueño en el que hace un par de meses escribí donde decía que entraba a ig y soñaba que habías subido un estado con ella hoy ya pasó eso y no sabes lo mucho que me dolió no sé si fue por verte feliz o porque conmigo nunca hiciste eso, recuerdo que decía que yo quería algo que no existía, quería ser como esas parejas que ponen todo en redes sociales y que eso a ti no te gusta, porque todo era fingió e hipócrita, hoy lo haces con ella y no quiere decir que sea hipócrita, quiere decir que estás enamorada y no sabes cómo más mostrarlo, creo que es verdad lo que dicen las personas, no ruegues, no pidas porque la persona que te ama lo hará las cosas sin que tú se lo pidas, hará las cosas de corazón y de todo lo que he podido ver sé que con ella has hecho muchas cosas que algún día yo quise que hicieras conmigo, pero no pudimos creo que siempre existió una excusa para no hacerlo, sabes te mando un fuerte abrazo y espero que te llegue y lo puedas sentir , yo necesito una de esos que tú me dabas y me hacías sentir que todo estará bien pero ya no habrá más de esos y también espero de todo corazón te vaya muy bien y espero de todo corazón poder olvidarte, lo necesito, no sabes cómo es después de tanto tiempo seguir aquí, estancada sin poder avanzar y en serio lo intento pero no puedo y no sé porque, he pedido un millón de veces ya no volver a verte y no tienes ni la mayor idea de que con qué fuerzas lo pido, no quiero volver a verte ni en fotos porque fuiste ese amor que me sano pero que me enseño lo que no necesito más en mi vida.

Psdt: Disfrazare mi te amo en un te quiero, porque creo que te amare siempre pero no puedo seguir diciéndolo más.

[armylovelyjm]

RM: "Espero estar en camino a alguna parte"

Entrevista de lanzamiento del álbum de BTS Butter

Hay dos engranajes en su vida entre los que RM cambia: cuando tiene que ganar velocidad como líder de un grupo de éxito mundial, y cuando regresa a casa y abre lentamente el catálogo de algún artista. Echemos un vistazo al tiempo intermedio, al viaje del joven artista para buscar su propio lienzo.

¿Todavía haces ejercicio? Tu estatura se ve muy diferente.

RM: ¿ Ha pasado alrededor de un año? Desde que empecé a hacerlo cuatro veces por semana sin falta. Es como mi salvavidas. (risas) Ya que, si haces ejercicio, tu cuerpo mejora gradualmente. Me gusta sentir que estoy haciendo algo y mejorando. Si miras a otras personas que publican su progreso, puedes ver que sus cuerpos cambian drásticamente, pero no soy muy estricto con mi dieta, así que no es así para mí. (risas) Aún así, puedo sentir que mi estructura cambia poco a poco.

Vi en el video "ARMY Corner Store" subido a YouTube para la celebración de FESTA 2021 de su octavo aniversario que su vida está enfocada en trabajar y hacer apariciones en estos días. ¿Seguir esa rutina repetitiva le ha llevado a algún cambio en su vida?

RM: Mi rutina diaria se ha vuelto muy clara. Ahora que ha pasado exactamente un año desde que comencé a hacer esto a mediados del año pasado, pienso: ¿Así es como vive la gente? Tengo que ir a trabajar y volver a casa, luego hay cosas que debo hacer allí y cosas que debo hacer, como hacer ejercicio. Y lo mismo para ver las exhibiciones. Entonces pensé que mi naturaleza misma había cambiado mucho en el transcurso de un año, pero no sé si es bueno para mí como creador.

¿Porque eso?

RM: Pasaron muchas cosas con BTS, pero con la situación actual, a veces sentí que esas cosas eran solo cosas que sucedían en mi teléfono. Cuando escucho otra música o veo algo, a veces pienso en cómo lo haría, pero mi vida es lo que es ahora, así que solo puedo aprovechar las cosas de mi propia vida.

En ese caso, ¿cómo se sintió mantener la energía para su actuación en los Grammy y para todo lo relacionado con "Butter"?

RM: Me alegré mucho de haber agregado una cosa más a nuestra lista de logros. Creo que nuestro equipo realmente necesitaba el trabajo en sí. Me hizo darme cuenta de que todavía nos quedan cosas por lograr. Y quiero agradecer a ARMY por encima de todos los demás por hacer posible todo esto. Soy coreano, así que no soy ajeno a encontrar alegría en los logros. (risas). Fue muy satisfactorio y agradable. Hubiera sido mejor si obtuviéramos un Grammy, pero ¿y si no lo hiciéramos?. Al final, conseguirlo significa que tienes un trofeo más en casa, y después de eso tu rutina diaria se repite.

¿Cómo fue escribir la letra de "Butter"? Tu actuación con SUGA funciona para aumentar la energía de la segunda mitad de la canción, pero también creo que logra un equilibrio para mejorar la canción en su conjunto. Tu rap corto se siente como una fusión del pop estadounidense y el estilo distintivo de BTS.

RM: Esa es la parte en la que pasé más tiempo. Aunque la canción está en inglés, pensé que deberíamos hacerla sentir como nuestra, así que mantuvimos la original pero le pusimos un poco de nuestro propio sabor al final.

Sentí que la puesta a punto resultó bien. Es corto, pero creo que hubiera sido una canción muy diferente sin esa parte.

RM: Se sentiría como si faltara algo si no estuviera allí, ¿verdad? (risas). Sentí que absolutamente teníamos que tenerlo ahí. Hay algo diferente en nosotros de las estrellas del pop estadounidenses. Nuestro ADN es diferente.

¿Cómo fue hacer "Permission To Dance"? Puedes contar con una mano cuántas canciones de BTS tienen un mensaje tan positivo como en esa canción.

RM: Correcto. Hablaron de poner un poco de rap en "Permission to Dance" mientras estábamos trabajando en ello, pero dijimos que nunca funcionaría. Me divierto más cantando y bailando que cualquier otra cosa. Creo que esta canción fue una de las pocas veces que sentí que me estaba divirtiendo mientras la cantaba y bailaba. Se siente increíble ceder a la canción con todo el cuerpo y reír en lugar de pensar demasiado en ello. Creo que ese es el poder de la canción. No estaba estresado preparándome para ello como lo estaba con "Butter". Cuando se trataba de "Butter", tenía que pensar en lo que deberíamos mostrar y cómo podía hacerlo. Siempre tengo cuidado de no ser un problema dentro de la dinámica del grupo. Pero realmente no tuve que preocuparme por eso con "Permission To Dance". Honestamente, sentí que solo necesitaba agregar una pizca del disfrute que sentía.

Después del inimaginable éxito continuo de "Dynamite" y "Butter", esta canción se siente un poco más relajada.

RM: Oh, esto es muy divertido. Y hay una línea en la letra que dice: "No tenemos que preocuparnos / porque cuando caemos sabemos cómo aterrizar". El mensaje es universal, pero se podría decir que también es algo que BTS ha estado diciendo todo el tiempo.

Hablaste de "2! 3!" en "ARMY Corner Store", diciendo: "2015 a 2017 fue un momento difícil para nosotros y nuestros fans". ¿Pudiste decir eso porque terminaste sabiendo cómo "aterrizar"?

RM: Lo que hago puede considerarse como una especie de negocio, un tipo de negocio de persona a persona. Por eso quiero ser lo más honesto posible con ARMY, casi obsesivamente. Dicen que no puede suceder en el mundo del K-pop, y hay un aspecto de buena fe en eso porque no quiero preocupar a los fans, pero quiero contarles sobre las cosas por las que hemos pasado. tanto como pueda. Otra razón por la que hablé de esos tiempos fue que quería saldar mis deudas con mucha gente. Pasar por alto esta historia como si nunca hubiera sucedido sería como decir "esos no somos nosotros". Y porque está en el pasado. Creo que, dado que está en el pasado, y como lo estamos haciendo bien ahora, y dado que esos días eran claramente necesarios, creo que tenemos que poder hablar sobre lo difícil que fue ese momento.

Parece que eso también era algo que querías transmitir a tus fans.

RM: A veces somos artistas cuyas almas están llenas hasta el corazón, a veces somos trabajadores de oficina meticulosos y, a veces, somos parte del hiperpatriótico "club de lo que sabes". Somos muchas cosas a la vez, por eso hablamos de persona y ego. Es un poco doloroso y solitario querer hablar de estas cosas hasta este punto, pero supongo que eso es lo que soy. Quiero expresarme en plenitud.

¿Dirías que la canción "Bicycle", lanzada durante el FESTA 2021, muestra quién eres como persona? Hablaste de tus emociones cotidianas usando una bicicleta como metáfora.

RM: Me he enfrentado a mucha presión mientras hacía música a lo largo de mi vida para avanzar un poco más o hacer música que se destaque mejor, desde cosas menores como mi técnica de rap hasta cosas más importantes como las tendencias. Quer��a ser bueno rapeando y quería algo de reconocimiento. En ese sentido, se podría decir que "Bicycle" es algo desafiante. Quería lanzar una canción para celebrar FESTA, pero el tema es realmente importante para mí específicamente. Las bicicletas ocupan un lugar importante en mi corazón, así que acabé escribiendo sobre eso. La canción es algo así como una brújula, que me dice dónde estoy ahora, me da la gana. Mi vida actual es la entrada, por lo que iba a terminar siendo la salida de una forma u otra.

Hay una parte en la letra en la que dices: "Cuando estás feliz, te entristeces". Te imaginaba montando tu bicicleta y contemplando tu vida.

RM: Mis sentimientos llegan a los extremos cada vez que voy en bicicleta. Mi personalidad solía correr a ambos extremos a veces, pero también vuelve a mí por sí sola cuando monto en bicicleta. Cuando monto en bicicleta, me libero de la presión de las cosas que se supone que debo sentir y pensar. No me importa si la gente me reconoce, y eso es lo más cerca que estoy de sentirme libre, mental y físicamente, cuando conduzco rápido y me siento como si estuviera en una nube.

En mi caso, hay una gran librería en mi vecindario, y hay ocasiones en las que camino hasta allí solo y pienso qué tipo de persona soy mientras elijo qué libros comprar. De alguna manera me hace pensar en eso.

RM: Leí un libro de Lee Seok Won de Sister's Barbershop recientemente. Estaba pensando por qué le gustan las librerías. Recordó que no solo es ruidoso, sino que todos están mirando sus libros y no mirando a nadie más, y hay una especie de libertad en eso. Realmente simpatizo con eso. Así que hago tiempo para ir a la librería y pasar un poco más de tiempo leyendo.

Termino hablando conmigo mismo con solo mirar todas las portadas de libros en la tienda. En cierto modo, es contemplación sobre contemplación, pero parece ser un momento especialmente necesario para ti.

RM: Creo que estaría bastante aburrido sin él, ya que últimamente he estado demasiado protegido. Leer! Elaborar! Ve a las galerías! Monta mi bicicleta! (risas)

Así que escribir "Bicycle" fue una experiencia por la que tuviste que pasar de todos modos, aunque no estamos seguros de dónde vienes, dónde estás ahora o hacia dónde te diriges.

RM: Exactamente. Fue exactamente ese tipo de hito de una canción para mí, y creo que lo tuve en cuenta hasta cierto punto cuando la lancé para FESTA. Acepté hacer algo al principio, pero luego me pregunté qué debía hacer y eso me vino a la mente de inmediato: hagamos algo con las bicicletas .

Incluso la música tiene conexiones profundas con toda la música que has escuchado, desde el folk hasta el hip hop y las escenas indie coreanas.

RM: Tienes razón. Me basé en la música de las personas que han tenido un impacto en mi vida: artistas que he estado escuchando últimamente, como Elliott Smith y Jeff Buckley, y grupos como KIRINJI.

Es interesante cómo el resultado final es una canción cuyo estilo es difícil de atribuir a una época. Ni el sentimiento ni el sonido son retro, ni reflejan las tendencias actuales.

RM: Yo y nuestro equipo estamos, se podría decir, a la vanguardia del pop, así que después de que hice "Bicycle" nos preguntamos si deberíamos seguirlo. Pero en realidad es por eso que terminé haciéndolo de esta manera. Porque así es mi vida ahora mismo. Es bueno para mí conocerme a mí mismo de esta manera, pero tampoco quiero quedarme atrapado. Por otro lado, me interesan artistas de todo el mundo que son totalmente diferentes a mí. Incluso hay personas que hacen música por capricho y que no se preocupan por el género cuya música me interesa ahora. Es...¿cómo debería decir esto? De todos modos, supongo que estoy en algún lugar de mi vida. (risas)

El año pasado, en una entrevista con la revista Weverse , dijiste: "Solo tengo 27 años en edad coreana". Creo que "Bicycle" podría ser tu propia respuesta a esa declaración: la canción de alguien que creció escuchando a Drake en Corea.

RM: Lo tienes. Exactamente. Drake fue quien me hizo pensar que yo también podía cantar en 2009 (risas) y eso es lo que me trajo hasta aquí. En el pasado, quería hacer algo como Drake: él influye en la música occidental a medida que cambia el estilo musical que busca. Pero como no vivo mi vida como ellos, no puedo hacer exactamente la misma música que ellos.

Y por esa razón, pensaste que es el tipo de canción que terminaría en las listas de reproducción de personas como tú, ya que tiene un estilo que puede expresar los sentimientos generales de esa persona más que cualquier género específico.

RM: Eso es lo que suele ocurrir con el tiempo. A veces pienso de esta manera: ¿No puedo poner "Bicycle" en el mismo mixtape que algunas canciones que están hechas totalmente de improviso, como acabo de hablar?. Desearía tener ese tipo de destello o imagen cuando hice canciones, pero hoy en día soy muy lento para hacerlas. Tampoco puedo pensar en las letras tan bien como solía hacerlo. Tengo más vías para absorber cosas nuevas y, sin embargo, la producción que viene de dentro de mí es ridículamente limitada y extremadamente lenta. Dicen que hay muchas historias de artistas del pasado que subieron a sus lienzos y no pudieron coger el pincel y gritar: "¿Quién soy yo?". Así es como me siento. He estado trabajando en un mixtape desde 2019, pero no he terminado tantas canciones.

Bueno, tal vez sea porque la dirección que quieres tomar con tus letras ha cambiado. Es decir, estás tratando de expresar las ideas que has construido dentro de ti, en lugar de tus experiencias o comentarios sociales.

RM: Por eso no puedo escribir letras tan rápido como solía hacerlo. No sé lo que estoy haciendo, así que no tengo más remedio que escribir primero. Y es por eso que creo que Yoongi es una persona tan increíble. Quiero decir, ¿cómo hace tantas canciones y tan bien? Tal vez sea porque tiene el punto de vista de un productor, pero yo no puedo hacer eso. No solo estoy celoso, sino que también creo que el punto de partida cuando hago música tiene que ser la letra. Solo...espero estar de camino a alguna parte. Pero así es como siempre me siento (risas), así que cuando escucho mis cosas de hace dos años, ya suena viejo.

Aparece en "Don't" de eAeon, que también cuenta con letras impresionantes, letras que comienzan con el color de las olas y terminan con una imagen de guijarros. Parece que es su interés en el arte lo que le permite seguir desarrollando esas imágenes visuales.

RM: No puedo decirlo con certeza, pero es probable que sea un fuerte reflejo. Había visto un artículo en el que un artista decía que los guijarros son la forma perfecta: una piedra desgastada una y otra vez en una serie de incidentes y coincidencias, que al final se convierte en una forma redonda. Dijo que el artista coleccionó guijarros durante mucho tiempo, diciendo que los guijarros son tan perfectamente lisos sin bordes, aunque no son círculos ni óvalos perfectos. Además, amo absolutamente a Lee Qoede. Vi una cita en un libro sobre su arte: "Vamos a enredarnos. Estemos unidos. No discutamos. Y convirtámonos en guijarros en la nueva narrativa de liderazgo de mi país". Lo escribió en una carta mientras trabajaba durante el período de liberación del país. Pensé que era, qué, una forma muy moderna de expresar las cosas, que alguien que vivió las caóticas circunstancias políticas de 1948 quiera convertirse en un guijarro. Sentí que sus palabras todavía tenían significado, como si siguieran viviendo. Supongo que el uso de la palabra "guijarro" por esos dos artistas me dejó una impresión muy duradera.

Me impresionó cómo las olas relativamente grandes dan paso a la imagen de pequeños guijarros, y luego terminas el flujo con letras como, "No quites ese nombre, el que solo tú conoces" y "Odio ser cualquiera wildflower ”, sobre una pequeña presencia definida por otros.

RM: Si, fue divertido. Una vez pensé que las relaciones de las personas son como olas rompientes, y creo que, mezclado con mis pensamientos sobre las piedras, todo salió a la luz. Hay una frase que escribí hace mucho tiempo mientras pensaba junto al mar. Pensé: ¿Hay algún color en las olas? Cuando la gente habla de olas rompiendo, ¿de qué olas están hablando? ¿Las olas azules o las olas blancas? Me excedí por completo de emoción cuando pensaba eso (risas), pero de nuevo, soy solo yo. Así que escribí esta frase: "Me pregunto de qué color son las olas", y escuché la música que me dio eAeon, y me sonó como niebla rodando sobre el océano. Fue realmente fácil comenzar a escribir la letra ya que la percepción sensorial de esa oración se superpuso con lo que él me dio. Fue un llamado "momento aha" (risas) y siempre que eso sucede, la letra sale de mí de una vez. Solo tomó alrededor de una hora y media escribir la letra. Más tarde pensé en más letras, pero terminé quedándome con las primeras.

¿Qué estás buscando que estás pensando tanto?

RM: Al final, es muy importante para mí preguntar quién soy y quiero expresar quién descubrí que soy, pero lo estoy pasando muy mal porque no sé si lo que encontré. es correcto. Entonces, por ahora, "Bicycle" es también el resultado de recopilar los yoes que encontré y que creo que representan lo mejor de mí. Incluso mientras hago una canción como "Bicycle", tengo que transmitir: ¿cómo digo esto? Se trata solo de mí, de este chico de fuera de la gran ciudad, una esencia de la que no puedo deshacerme, supongo. No puedo dejar ir al chico que solía actuar en Hongdae. Realmente no es algo que quiera expresar o aferrarme; es mi esencia, así que realmente no tengo otra opción. (risas)

De todos modos, solo andarás en bicicleta.

RM: Exactamente. Exactamente eso. (risas)

Fin del artículo 📝

DATO EXTRA:

Para los que no saben los guijarros son unas piedras pequeñas y redondeada a causa de la erosión que se encuentra generalmente a orillas de ríos y arroyos.

Traducción por Twitter;;

@/ARMYLovelyJM 🐼

Fuente: Weverse Magazine —

[wullam]

La noticia

 Narrador POV:

Han pasado alrededor de dos semanas desde que Spamton despertó. El plan de Kris ha estado funcionando bastante bien. No ha habido problemas y no parece ser que nada vaya a ir mal si las cosas siguen como están. 

Hace varios días, Spamton le pidió trabajo a Swatch en su café y éste se negó al proncipio, pero cuando vió lo útil que sería Spamton, cambió de opinión.  Lo puso a hacer tareas domésticas, luego le enseñó a preparar platillos sencillos.  Spamton demostró ser bastante eficiente en cumplir con estas tareas. Es rápido, creativo y hace bien lo que se le pide. Realmente podría ser bastante bueno en cualquier cosa si aprende lo suficiente. Tras varios días de prueba, Swatch decidió ponerlo a prueba en el café. Aún no se lo decía a Spamton, primero tenía que organizar algunas cosas y también hablar con los Swatchlings acerca de la prueba.  Swatch POV:

He decidido dejar que Spamton haga una prueba para tomar un puesto en el café. Tendrá que competir con los Swatchlings, y, aunque no creo que logre superarlos, imagino que podría encontrar trabajo en algún lugar similar. Debo admitir que es bastante bueno en las tareas. Es creativo, pero a veces demasiado. También se emociona mucho pero creo que eso puede mejorar con el tiempo. Después de un largo día, regresé del trabajo y Spamton me esperaba.  -Cómo te fue? preguntó Spamton una vez que entré a la casa. -Me fue bastante bien, gracias- respondí. -Qué bien- dijo Spamton, con entusiasmo.  Fui a mi habitación y me puse mis pijamas. Al terminar, me hice de cenar. Me preguntaba si debía hablar con Spamton acerca de la prueba ahora o mañana temprano, pero pensé “no quiero abrumarlo, es mejor que descanse bien”.  Una vez terminé, me despedí de Spamton y me fui a la cama. A la mañana siguiente, me levanté y me preparé para ir a trabajar y para avisar a Spamton. Salí de mi habitación y me dirigí a la cocina para comer algo, pero se me había adelantado. Estaba preparando emparedados de queso fundido.  -Buenas tardes Swatch- dijo Spamton mientras volteaba un emparedado. -Buenas tardes, Spamton- respondí.  -Dormiste bien? -Se podría decir- “en realidad, me fue un poco difícil, siento que me espera un día muy largo”-pensé. -Me alegro “Bueno, es el momento” Respiré hondo. -Spamton, tengo una noticia para ti. -Oh, qué es?- Spamton me miró con atención. -Mira, he estado pensando, y, después de las cosas que te hice hacer, siento que... Puedes hacer la prueba para trabajar en el café. -...- Spamton se me quedó mirando, luego, mostró una enorme sonrisa y saltó del taburete en el que estaba subido para alcanzar la estufa. -OH, GRACIAS GRACIAS GRACIAS CRACIAS- exclamaba Spamton mientras saltaba por el suelo de la cocina. -Tranquilo amigo, es solo un- Spamton me interrumpió. -Y CUÁNDO EMPIEZO?, ME DARÁN UNIFORME?- Spamton siguió haciendo preguntas de manera tan frenética y tan rápido que era difícil entenderlo . -Spamton, cálmate- dije, pero parecía que se perdió en su mundo. Luego, de un salto subió de nuevo al taburete. -SALUDEN AL NUEV-  -SPAMTON- exclamé. inmediatamente, su mirada se volvió muy seria, hasta más rápido que cuando apagas la luz de un cuarto. -Spamton... -S-s-si?- preguntó Spamton, muy nervioso.  -... El emparedado...- Spamton rápidamente se volteó hacia la estufa. Los emparedados se habían quemado. -... -... P-p-puedo asegurarte q-que eso va a pasar de nuevo- dijo Spamton, y apagó la estufa.  -...Ya que estás calmado, repetiré lo que dije. Es una PRUEBA. -Oh... Y-y en qué consiste e-esta prueba? -Como verás- dije mientras me recargaba en el pretil de la cocina- Ya tengo empleados en el café, así que vas a, en cierta manera, competir con ellos. -C-competir? -Ellos ya hacen un buen trabajo, y tienes suerte de que hemos alcanzado una mayor popularidad, puesto que con ello hay más clientes qué atender, pero aún así tienes que demostrar que puedes trabajar adecuadamente en el lugar, ya sea limpiando o cocinando. De momento no puedo darte un trabajo de mesero ya que aprender cómo atender con los clientes, pero, en caso de que superes la prueba, tal vez algún día te de el puesto, si así lo deseas. -Y cuándo es esta prueba? -Puedes estar tranquilo, tienes varios días para entrenarte para igualar el trabajo de los Swatchlings, pero aún así, existe la posibilidad de que no logres superarla, así que... si no lo logras, no te desesperes, tal vez puedas encontrar otro trabajo en otro sitio.  -...- hubo un poco de silencio. -... Swatch? -Si? -... Si es que fallo la prueba... Me echarás? -Por supuesto que no, pero aún así tendrás que ayudarme a mantener este sitio limpio, el mantenerte no es gratis. -Entiendo... PERO ENTONCES SI SUPERO LA PRUEBA PODRÉ TRABAJAR EN TU CAFÉ?- el entusiasmo de Spamton volvió. -Creo que es evidente, pero sería de poco a poco. Y trata de no emocionarte mucho, no quiero emparedados quemados en mi café. -MUY BIEN, ENTONCES TENGO QUE ENTRENAR MUY DURO- exclamó Spamton y se fue al cuarto de servicio. “Este tipo no tiene paciencia para nada” Luego, miré mi reloj. Tenía que irme ya. Pero...

“Y mis emparedados?”

[valeria-prieto]

Hello friends! I have uploaded a full new video to my YouTube channel where you can watch my “month in the life”. September was a short and long month (yes! All at the same time 😅) but I’m grateful for my work and to share it with all of you. Thank you for your support, it means the world! 🎨🤍🙏🏻. . . ¡Hola amigos! He subido un nuevo video a mi canal de YouTube donde puedes por completo ver mi "mes en la vida". Septiembre fue un mes corto y largo (¡sí! Todo al mismo tiempo 😅) pero estoy agradecida por mi trabajo y por compartirlo con todos ustedes. ¡Gracias por su apoyo, significa mucho para mi! 🎨🤍🙏🏻. . . . . #paint #painting #monthinthelife #stlouis #youtubeartist #artistsofinstagram #artstudio #artist #portrait #selfie #oilpaint #oilpainting #art #artistoninstagram #artistlife #onmycanvas #artwork #painter #contemporaryartist #contemporarypaint #oilpaintings #womenpainters #latinartist #artistalatina #stlouisartist #instaart #artoftheday #modernartists #colorfulart #contemporaryart (at Glendale, Missouri) https://www.instagram.com/p/CUdFZi_F3wZ/?utm_medium=tumblr