#no guarantees for when i'll actually make another though. we'll see

[captainswan618]

This song is so perfect for them, I'm actually gonna cry

Anyway here you go, have some more emotions!!!

[sanicsmut]

Words of the Fallen

Technically Darien Gautier x Vestige!Reader, but all I can say is play Summerset's main quest in ESO before reading this.

part 2

Warnings : Use of Y/N once. Angst because it is. Spoilers for the end of Summerset. Language. The letter is taken directly from the game, which is why it’s written way better than what I’ve actually written.

Words: 1000 (I can't believe I got such a perfect count)

Robin’s comment: Cried making this, bon appétit. More seriously, this chapter (the game's DLC I mean) made me hate Meridia. She was one of my favorite daedric princes, but now it's over. All hail Azura. Anyway this is basically me telling Meridia what she deserves to hear. There's also a hint of a part two at the end ;). I'll try to write it, but I can't guarantee anything.

"Never trust a Daedric Prince. If there's anything I learned from all this, that's it in a nutshell. I used to think I had a purpose, a part to play in the grand scheme of things. I suppose I did, sort of, but the way things turned out, it wasn't at all the way I imagined. Meridia said I was her vessel. I guess my fate was sealed from the moment she brought me into existence.

Now, here I am, back in the Colored Rooms. I thought that when I gave my energy to restore the sword—and I did that for my friend, not for Meridia—I thought that was the end of me. I'm back, though, but this time is different. My light, it's fading. I can feel the darkness getting closer, pressing in. I expect that once the light goes out, that will be the end.

I need to tell you something about Meridia. She's a deceiver. She promised that if I served her faithfully, I'd earn my freedom. She never told me that freedom was just another word for the void. Don't trust her. Don't trust any of the Daedric Princes. Not ever.

I've found peace though. Meridia gave me a chance to see the world, and those I care about, one last time. To save those I loved. I'm grateful for that, at least.

I wish I had a chance to say goodbye to everyone. To Skordo. To Gabrielle. Gods, I'll miss them. But most of all, (Y/N). I don't know if she will understand how much she truly meant to me. Perhaps we'll see each other again, in another place, another time. I probably won't be the version of myself that's writing these words, though. That me will be gone. I can live with that.

I only wish I could have spent more time with everybody. Had a few more adventures. Ordered those drinks like we always talked about.

I hope my friends find peace, happiness, and love. They deserve what I could never have. If anyone ever finds this book, know that I will never forget those I named herein. And, if you find them, and I pray that you do, tell them this.

Protect the ones you love. Hold them close. Cherish their every moment. Make them laugh, and laugh with them. Smile together and never, ever, forget that the moments you have are so very precious.

Oh, and tell them not to forget me, either. I mean, I am a legend, as far as I know.

The polite, handsome, and humble knight,

Darien Gautier”

You let the book fall back on the bench where you found it.

No… No…

You were breathing heavily. And a few minutes later, surrounded by those trees, you let out your anguish.

Dawnbreaker gripped tight in your hand, you screamed.

“Take it back! Take your goddamn sword back!”

“It seems my vessel isn’t the only one who ended up having feelings when he shouldn’t.”

A bright light. There it was, this patronizing voice. This voice you had respected, after giving you back your soul and helping you in Coldharbour. This voice you grew to hate.

“You bitch, he was my friend!”

“Where is your respect, Vestige?”

Vestige. You hadn't been called that since that time you helped Abnur Tharn in Elsweyr. Only the companions called you that. The companions and Meridia. But even the Daedric Prince hasn’t called you that during this whole mission. It was like you were back in Coldharbour all over again. Back fighting for what you thought was right, back, fighting against and with forces you couldn’t comprehend.

“My respect for you died when Darien got condemned. By your fault.”

“He was my vessel, an empty shell, a weapon to do my bidding. He served his purpose.”

“He was my friend!” You yelled again.

“And a traitor.”

“How the f-”

“He sacrificed he life for you. He purified my sword, not to serve me, but to help you.”

“Oh, so this is it? You’re throwing a tantrum because your tool wasn’t devoted to you only?”

“Careful with your words, Vestige.”

“You owe me! I’m the one who fought Molag Bal, I’m the one who assembled all those allies to stop the coalition! I’m the one who just stopped Nocturnal! And you owe him too! He may have purified Dawnbreaker for me, but everything else he did was for you, to serve you, because he was your champion! Because he truly thought he could trust you!”

“And you owe me for your soul. And he owes me for the purpose I gave him.”

“You wouldn’t have been able to take my soul if I hadn’t fought in Coldharbour! It’s all thanks to me! And his purpose? He could’ve been a hero without disappearing for your fucking sake! Hell, he just wanted to help his friends!”

“Friends he shouldn’t have had in the first place.”

“I swear, I defeated Molag Bal and Nocturnal, I can defeat you too. Take back your fucking sword and give me back my friend.”

You could feel Meridia’s rising anger, the air feeling tense around you despite the Daedric prince not being here physically.

“You want your ‘friend’ back?” The prince of light asked, her voice filling you with a bad feeling.

“Yes!” You answered. “Free him from your realm!”

You swore you almost heard Meridia growling, even if that sounded out of character. But that being was strict and cold, full of authority, like a severe and cruel mother. But nothing about her was motherly. She might have been less ‘evil’ than other princes, but she still served her own interests, mortals were just tools for her, or obstacles she had to get rid of. And you were sure that she was now in the second category.

“You will have to free him yourself.” Meridia declared. “That is, if you can get out of my realm.”

Her voice was tainted in cruelty, and a blinding light burnt your eyes before everything went black.

[traegorn]

I need to stop doing this to myself.

(A Rant Where Trae Has Written Too Many Books This Month)

So since most of you started following me because of Witchcraft or podcast stuff, I realize a lot of you don't know how much fiction writing I do.

Primarily what I've published are comics. The big one is UnCONventional (which ran from December of 2009 to December of 2019), but I also did a steampunk comic called The Chronicles of Crosarth (which I put on hiatus in like 2018 intending to come back to... but I haven't, and I make no guarantee that I will even though over 650 of the 800 planned pages are done). Crosarth is... fine? The art isn't great in either of these, but UnCONventional carries itself with the humor.

But that's all old stuff. You may be like "Trae, what have you been producing for the last four years," and the answer is "not a lot." I got major creative block with the pandemic. Peregrine Lake, the "Northwoods Gothic" comic I was supposed to launch in 2020 (which has some characters from UnCONventional in it) didn't materialize when I said it would. What storytelling energy I had went into Stormwood & Associates and The Meatgrinder (my two actual play podcasts), but that was it.

And then 2023 happened, and the juices started flowing again.

Peregrine Lake is moving forward -- but with me just doing the writing. My urge to draw has not returned, but my urge to write has. A friend of mine, Ethan Flanagan, is drawing it, and I've written the first year of comics. It likely won't launch any time soon (the artist I'm working with is busy as hell so we want to get a shit-ton of the comic done before we launch it -- we have like the first month and a half of the comic ready?). But yeah -- it's happening. I hoping for Spring, but we'll see.

The other thing though is that I've started writing, like, novels. I've always had like twenty ideas in my head, so I figured I'd give it a shot. I decided to start with the idea I cared the least about (in case I fucked it up): A queer urban fantasy story.

In the last month and a half I've written complete drafts of two different novels in this setting, and am halfway through another one... and have another one outlined.

I, uh, had some ideas.

If you're asking yourself "Hey Trae -- what the fuck? That's a lot" you need to know a few things that aren't obvious. At one point in college, in 72 hours, I produced over 40 pages of text between three research papers. All were for 300 level courses, and I may have disassociated while writing them because I frankly don't remember most of it. But, like, they were decent papers.

One of those papers is in Google Scholar.

Anyway, yeah. I haven't been sleeping great because I've been obsessively writing, but you might ask "Why didn't you just write one and get it ready to publish?" That's a great question. Because I wrote a book, and when I was 3/4 of the way through it I realized something very important: This book would make a great sequel to a book I haven't written. I've been writing book two in a series where I haven't written book one yet.

Well fuck.

So I finished that draft, and I went and wrote book one. Now that book? That book I'm getting ready to publish. I expect to have it out in January. Part of my editing process involves setting what I think is a completed, good, revised draft down for a couple of weeks and then returning to it with fresh eyes. We're in that waiting period right now.

But I still had a bunch of energy.

So the first thing I did was a revising draft on book two (the one I wrote first), but I finished that. And had more energy. And more stories in this setting kept popping up.

So I started a third book. And I'm halfway through the first draft of that book. But then I realized yesterday... shit, this isn't book three.

This is book four.

I need stuff to happen before we get to this story.

So now I've outlined the actual book three, and am working on literally both of these books at once (I'll take a break for Christmas and then go do a final edit on Book One).

And... I'm just like... why am I like this?

I need to stop myself for a few days and get more sleep.

[sunskate]

VM show: ep 4 Scott's back injury, Skate Canada in St. John, Tessa photoshoot

this episode is upbeat, and they're getting along so well that you have to think a lot of the tension in the first 3 episodes wasn’t balanced in the big picture. either that or the upbeat part is exaggerated too😅

Tessa is doing a photoshoot that the show is pretending is in Canton whyyy? though it's in the VM tradition of telling unnecessary untruths and making things more complicated than they need to be😅💀

left is the show, right is from the house & home 2018 feature on her London house

T: i'm a very private person, and yet part of what we do is promote our brand and bring on sponsorships [...] you know, a little bit of that notoriety is great because it helps our career and helps the sport. i don't know what the future holds for me after skating, and i want my options open

she's always called herself private, but i think she's not so much that as self protective and wanting to feel in control of her image, because she's used a lot of personal stuff strategically in ads, sm, and media in general. using the word notoriety is odd? that's usually being famous for something negative, though in celebrity culture it can grant an air of interest or mystery - so does she actually mean it - she likes using their *thing* to draw people's interest? does notoriety relate to shipbaiting, or is it just a word she means without the negative connotation

what would come after skating was very close at the time. she clearly was interested in the "business side.” it's probably relatively easy compared to skating while using her performing skills and strategic brain with the gratification of feedback, pretty pictures, and a guaranteed $$ reward

VM had been driving themselves without a break from an unusually young age - late childhood, all of teenhood to age 24/26 was in a pressure cooker of sacrifice and severe discipline. but on top of that, she had pain - i don't think anyone but her can really understand what kind of grit it took to endure shattering pain and push through and deliver. to make her efforts not feel wasted and to feel she hadn't let herself, Scott, and others down. by 2014 she *had* to want the relief of being done and flying the cage? when you're in distress, it's hard to feel much except you want it gone. and she'd suffered that for years and two surgeries

so i think she can sound like she hated skating and wanted to push everything about it away, but maybe it's like if you're having an anxiety attack or feeling claustrophobic, the distress has to stop before you can feel much of anything else. and while she stopped skating, it sounded for a while like her legs didn't stop hurting even after

if you didn't keep her pain in mind, how she's talked about skating can feel kind of callous and like she didn't value it that much. i hope she's come to more peace about it for herself. and that Scott understands, because otherwise it seems like it would be hurtful to hear her talk that way?

another piece of all this is her father. she said in this interview that she had a "tumultuous" relationship with him and that she decided when she was 15 to be financially independent so there's a piece of 'i'll show you' about her wanting to go make her own money. he was still around at the time of this show as we'll see, but maybe not for long

all this out of a 43 second clip of an episode 😅

[yxstxrdrxxm-a]

(Since i already did reveal myself, i'll just send asks without being an anon lol)

Oh! That's easy, actually. Although we won't be available when we leave tomorrow, we contacted a certain someone that can run this blog and inform us of any messages you have for either me or Eros ^^

Navina? 👀

Speaking of, Eros wanted to tell you that he appreciated your presence, Mochi! Every time we talked about you and the others, I've seen him smile and mutter something about getting a calico cat and naming her after you. It was so cute! Eros never had any close friends other than me, so seeing her talk about everyone and you like we were all best friends warmed my heart.

SJNSKSJDJD- THAT IS SO CUTE??? Naming a calico cat after me, awhhh 🥺 cupid, can you tell eros that i appreciate knowing her too?? Tell her i said she's very cute too- (and yk there's something funny about your words. I also have a calico cat roaming around my house lmaoo, why is my life so full of funny coincidence-)

Aha... Anyways, before I go on rambling, that's all I can say. We'll see what we can do to make things easier and so we can speak to you all again, hehe! I hope you'll still be around when that happens :D

Oh yeah, i forgot to copy the sentence, but uhh, about that interesting thing in next month, i'll be sure to keep my eyes on it! Whether it'd be another event (i doubt it would be this one, please rest navina 💀) or anything else, i will be enthusiastic about it :] AND YES, I WILL STILL BE AROUND 🙆🏻‍♀️ you can't get rid of me, i'm like that small mistake when you're drawing and you just can't seem to erase it unless you get to the layer who has it-

Hehe, whoever it is will be a surprise, but I'll tell Eros that you appreciate the sentiment as well! She's out right now to get some last minute groceries (and also snacks, we'll be having a small movie night to celebrate our resignation!), so she'll definitely be pleased to hear your message.

Anyway, its nice to see you'll stick around even if we won't be here, then :D hope you enjoy what else will go down while we're busy settling some last minute plans.

(note from yours truly: HELPAIDSRFHUI NOT THE CALICO CAT... dwdw, Im gonna rest for after the main story + maybe writing the dlc fics. on hindsight, they might not be guaranteed to be all posted because bro, my brain needs a huge reboot when this sht is all done and dusted. orz.)

(tbh the next one wont be abt OLC anymore, thankfully, but! it will also reference this + make small cameos. Dont know what I'll do this time around when I get the chance but we shall see kek)

(Istg though when Im done Im gonna limit whoever I'll write. I love writing all of these characters and thinking abt them but God do I now resent how many I have to research. fuck THAT.)

(anyways!! I shall go eep for a good while on writing + maybe post dlcs. I will say that some fics will most def not be published even after the week for dlc stuff/extra fics because my brain just. isnt braining. orz orz im gonna cry. i'll prolly post them randomly idk HAIUHDUFSI anyways ill shut up now goodbye—)

[atarev]

ORFIST MASQUES: Set 12

Hello!

Over the past few weeks Ive realised that although sparse, there's a Cardfight Vanguard community on Tumblr which i personally find amazing and I wanted to see if I could contribute to it!

I want to try and make posts about decks from the latest sets that interest me, or any decks at all really, particularly ones that may have been written off on-reveal.

So what better place to start than with a card I myself called "Regis 2" and 'The Worst Masques Yet" than Cardinal Mors, Orfist Masques!

This card on reveal was met with a lot, and I mean A Lot of outrage, because this is what it does aside from the normal Masques Clause

ACT1/Turn:COST [Remove a card with "Orfist" in its different card name from this unit from hand, soul, or drop], choose a World card from your drop, and put it into order zone. AUTO:When this unit attacks, COST [Counter Blast (1) & put any number of World cards from order zone into drop], and call up to the same number of Shadow Army tokens as the number of World cards put into drop for this cost to (RC) with units. If you called two or more cards, this unit gets drive +1 until end of that battle.

Dropping World Orders?? When the deck wanted to stack them previously for Regis?? What insane contradiction is this??

Fear not Zakusa, Orfist or Edginess fans!! Thanks to Mors itself and 2 new cards, you hardly end up feeling the loss at all with constant regeneration of the ditched orders!

Code: 3TBVD on JP DECKLOG (this wont work on EN Decklog yet!)

Here's the list! I've talked about it with various other cfv fans and found that at least for me, this deck works wonderfully! More details below the cut! If you were just here for the list, I hope you enjoy it!

Okay so! Each card in this deck is pretty important, and while some ratios are flexible (for example, how many Eternity's, Eclipsed and Hollowing's you want, or your ratio of Masque to Masque searcher) there are a few non negotiables outside of the obvious 4 Orfist Masques

We'll start with one of Orfists' newest mates, Polraxis Dragon!

Now Polraxis was already amazing for Regis because of his skills: 1. If you have an Orfist VG, Sb1, choose an order with a different name from those in your order zone in your drop, and set it. 2. When this unit is retired from RG OR discarded from hand during your battle phase, draw 1.

However he Truly shines in Masques because Orfist Masques requires you to call on top of existing units! He's also one of the main reasons you dont actually end up feeling the order ditch alongside Masques 1st main skill (the removal one).

Now onto what is, in my opinion, the backbone of the deck, Cardinal Principle, Oppart!

Oppart is the glue that holds this deck together and really lets it do what it wants, especially in the hands of someone efficient at managing their resources! Firstly, Oppart synergises beautifully with Mors and Polraxis because he CB1s to ditch an order from deck if you have an Orfist VG, and his other skill is just Nuvorea! When called over, call a shadow army token!

He and Polraxis are your obvious targets for Orfist Masques, call over 1 of each while dropping 2 orders, you now have 3 tokens, 1 extra draw and an extra drive check! He truly helps push games and make your turns before your kill (though in my opinion, as soon as you masque, every turn is a kill turn) truly meaningful.

Now since Oppart is a bit of a controversial pick, i'll talk about some more of those! Namely Combine Rusher, Fronts, Main-decking Regis and not running Grunder.

Combine Rusher is Excellent, he's a recurring beater in the late game which is what truly matters, having a 15k vg with cubisia is nice, but its only one guaranteed damage if that, Combine adds up to a lot more

Fronts instead of draws just maximise the decks win-con of Massive Tokens whilst also providing critical shield! With the advent of Omanigruzio (which I might talk about in another post) extra shield is incredibly important!

Grunder, my beloved, has just never worked for me! His top 7 check has (almost) always whiffed and his retrieval skill takes orders out of where you want them for polraxis, regis and mors! And speaking of Regis, if you're able to ride from Mors to Regis and have a hydragrum in drop? That is at Least 2 orders set again to say nothing of a polraxis or one in hand. That highroll is far too tempting for me, and in a deck that wants to highroll anyway, why not raise the ceiling?

That's all my thoughts! I hope that this can show people that we can only truly judge a deck when it's out in the wild and performing, and even then to never count it out! (Source: Orfist REGIS making it to 2ND in last years worlds iirc) and no matter what, to play what you want even if it suffers from Masques-Itis (necessitating potential bricks to access extreme power).

If this can reach Anyone in the community, feel free to let me know if you want me to talk about a particular deck! Even if its one ive never used, I'd love to give newer stuff a shot! Just in D Standard though!

Thanks for reading and have a good one! Ciao!

[pyrettawychwiggin]

Pyretta's Answers:

1. Who is/are your comfort character(s)?

I have a few; Daine & Numair from Tamora Pierce's 'The Immortals' series, Crow from Destiny 2, Julian from The Arcana, Lara Croft (just like, in general). The list goes on 😅 These days, I've been hyperfixated on Nanami Kento from Jujutsu Kaisen 🥴❤️‍🔥

2. Lighter or matches?

Lighter, but matches will do.

3. Do you leave the window open at night?

I don't think that's wise, no. If I could trust that some crazy person wouldn't take advantage, I probably would, though - I love the air flow.

4. Which cryptic being do you believe in?

Would you count the fae? If not that, definitely skinwalkers.

5. What colour are your eyes?

Green-ish, with kind of a hint of hazel sometimes.

6. Why did you do that?

I was in a very dark place in my life - I'm just glad I got out of things before I did something stupid.

7. Hair ties or scrunchies?

Back when I had hair long enough, I loved my scrunchies. I had a lil' collection going. Nowadays I rock a short style - more comfy.

8. How many water bottles are in your room right now?

None, actually. Usually I have one or two in there, though.

9. Which do you prefer - hot coffee or cold coffee?

Iced and packed full of sugar.

10. Would you slaughter the rich?

#EatTheRich (the mega-rich, anyways. I don't see anything wrong with someone who has lots of wealth; it's the multi-billionaires that I think are wholly unethical)

11. Favourite extracurricular activity?

Making/listening to music for sure.

12. What kind of day is it?

Gloomy, actually. Something in the air has myself and everyone I know feeling 'off.' Ah well. Another day tomorrow - sun'll come out eventually.

13. When was the last time you ate?

A couple hours ago.

14. Do you love the smell of the earth after it rains?

It's one of my favourite smells, actually.

15. Are you a parent?

I think I have a tamagotchi still lying around here somewhere... 🤔

16. Can you drive?

Yep. I only started driving a few years ago, but I finally got a move on anyways.

17. Are you nearsighted or farsighted?

I'm more near-sighted than far-sighted, but not at a point to need glasses or contacts (yet).

18. What hair products do you use?

I love the Amika brand shampoo, conditioner and dry shampoo. Aside from that, the only other hair product I use is Evo's 'Salty Dog' salt spray.

19. Imagine we're at a sleepover - would you paint my nails?

I mean hey, sure - I just can't guarantee I'll paint them well 😅💅

20. Do you say soda or pop?

I say both, actually - no rhyme or reason, I just kinda blurt our whichever comes out in the moment 😅🥤

21. Something you've kept since your childhood.

A mix CD from my late first boyfriend - I've had it since 10th grade.

22. What type of person are you?

I'd say 'sentimental.' Sometimes delusional with my tendency to lean into escapism - it leads me to be a bit of an idealist, and I can have unrealistic expectations sometimes.

23. How do you feel about chilly weather?

I don't mind it, really - it's when the air is so cold it hurts my face that it starts to get old.

24. If we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

Stargazing and listening to some tunes for sure - with any luck, we'll catch some northern lights. Also snacks. We always need snacks.

25. Perfume/body spray or lotion?

I don't really use perfume - maybe on occasion I'll use a body spray from Bath & Body Works or something, but lotion I use every day.

26. A scenario that you've replayed multiple times?

The last hour I spent with my grandfather. I feel like if I had really known that was going to be the last hour, I would have had so much more to say.

27. About how many hours of sleep did you get?

Six, give or take? Which is a lot for me.

28. Do you wear a mask?

I do, but I'm a dental assistant, so that just kind of comes with the gig. Other than that, I wear masks when I am feeling under the weather, but need to be out in public for whatever reason, or if I'm in a place where masks are required by the business/health code standards.

29. How do you like your shower water?

Wet? (Ha) Nah, I usually like it at some semi-extreme temperature; either hotter than hellfire, or glacier cold.

30. Are there dishes in your room?

Nope.

31. What type of music keeps you grounded?

Some nice acoustic indie tunes; maybe some lo-fi tunes.

32. Do you have a favourite towel?

I do love my blue striped beach towel ♡

33. The last adventure you've been on?

My last adventure.... Drumheller with my partner, actually! Last year 🦖🦕

34. Is there a song you know every word to by heart?

Every song from Evanescence's 'Fallen' album, but there are many songs outside of that, too.

35. What's your timezone?

Mountain Standard Time.

36. How many times have you changed your url?

Only once, I think. As far as I can remember, anyways.

37. Someone in your life other than a relative that you've known for 10+ years.

My non-blood brother and sister - my lifelines.

38. A soap bar that smells good.

I don't use bar soap, actually. Just liquid soaps. I usually go for unscented stuff, but rain/ocean-scented is usually a good bet for me.

39. Do you use lip balm?

Erryday - specifically, I love Burt's Bees and Barefoot Venus.

40. Did you have any snacks today?

Yep! Doritos and a Pepsi slurpee this afternoon. Aside from that, it's been all celery, carrots, cucumbers and oranges.

41. How do you take your coffee?

Iced and sickeningly sweet; like, more sugar than coffee, probably.

42. An app you frequently use aside from this godforsaken site.

Well, Instagram and TikTok (like most of the world). Aside from that, I use my Artful Agenda religiously. I used to be a big fan of paper agendas, but I needed to switch to electronic for convenience, but I liked that I could still get the same customization and fun options of a paper agenda with it. So now, it's my only real 'every day' app.

43. What's your take on spicy foods?

I wish my tongue wasn't so weak so I could enjoy them more, but alas 🥵

44. You get a free pass to kill anyone - who is it?

Honestly? No one.

45. Can you remember what happened yesterday?

Pfft, I can barely remember what I had for lunch this afternoon, much less what happened yesterday 😅

46. Favourite holiday film?

I've always enjoyed watching Sleepy Hollow, Corpse Bride, and Hocus Pocus around the Halloween season. As for Yule, I'm leaning towards Krampus, Elf, Love Actually, and The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe.

47. What was the last message you sent?

A single-emoji text to my dad that says '🗿'

48. When did you first try an alcoholic beverage?

I think I was 16/17 years old. Nothing crazy, just a bottle of Corona.

49. Can you skip rocks?

Not well, but I can. Sometimes 🙃

50. Can I tag you in random stuff?

As long as it's not:

• racist/sexist/homophobic/transphobic, etc.

• AI art

• spam

• just harmful to someone like, in general

Then by all means, lol

here’s weirder asks

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

lighter or matches?

do you leave the window open at night?

which cryptyd being do you believe in?

what color are your eyes?

why did you do that?

hair-ties or scrunchies?

how many water bottles are in your room right now?

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?

would you slaughter the rich?

favorite extracurricular activity?

what kind of day is it?

when was the last time you ate?

do you love the smell of earth after it rains?

are you a parent? (all answers qualify)

can you drive?

are you farsighted or nearsighted?

what hair products do you use?

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?

do you say soda or pop?

something you’ve kept since childhood?

what type of person are you?

how do you feel about chilly weather?

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

perfume/body spray or lotion?

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

about how many hours of sleep did you get?

do you wear a mask?

how do you like your shower water?

is there dishes in your room?

what type of music keeps you grounded?

do you have a favorite towel?

the last adventure you’ve been on?

is there a song you know every word to by heart?

what’s your timezone?

how many times have you changed your url?

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?

a soap bar that smells good?

do you use lip balm?

did you have any snacks today?

how do you take your coffee?

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?

what’s your take on spicy foods?

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?

can you remember what happened yesterday?

favorite holiday film?

what was the last message you sent?

when did you first try an alcohol beverage?

can you skip rocks?

can i tag you in random stuff?

[yandereloversblog]

𝐓𝐎𝐊𝐘𝐎 𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑𝐒

Random discussion I wanted to do cuz it's a shower thought about TR. It started as Bonten Mikey but it also fitted other characters and it turned into an essay >>'

Also incoming editing to these yandere discussions cuz I finally have a layout XD

Like your yandere asking you if you love them and you answering yes because Stockholm Syndrome, scared you'll get hurt more or punished and all that bullshit. Then that asshole hits you with the "Then how about we die together? Kill ourselves at the same time while holding eachother?" Cuz they're too tired to live but you huff and say no.

Before they can throw another temper tantrum/punish you you're gonna respond with "The afterlife isn't known at all, whether our souls might find each other there isn't guaranteed either, or if we'll be reincarnated at the same time. So I want to keep living with you for as long as I can and make even more memories. Maybe they'll help me find you again in our next life." And smile.

They turn so red from blushing and probably start crying cuz they think you love them so much, promising they'll make sure you two keep living together for a very long time while cuddling closely to you and clinging for dear life. Apologizing profusely about how they even brought it up and it was so insensitive to ask you to die with them when you wanted to live for such a lovely reason.

Meanwhile you're probably tied to the bed comforting them, with some will to live and escape left in you and you're not gonna let this lover's suicide trope ruin it.

Mikey for sure, that bitch just added 20 more years to his life because of this 💀 especially Bonten Mikey, like you saw light flash in his dead eyes for a minute when you were talking before he broke down crying. Kanto Mikey would break down too, a lot more queitly while clinging to you but he's sobbing and choking out apologies. I'm not even gonna bringing up Toman Mikey/Manila Mikey, cuz we know they'd start crying immediately and probably kneel for forgiveness cuz they wanted to end everything just because they were done with life when they should be greatful for even being able to breath the same air as you since you love them back.

Sanzu too, man just can't believe you actually wanna continue being with him after everything he's done. In Bonten it probably happens after Mikey fell from the roof with Takemichi and now he feels he can't protect you either but how dare you give him another reason to live? Meanwhile with Kanto and Toman Sanzu they fall in love all over again. Tbh they all probably gave you a mocking grin and said "So you finally learned." But bitch even the blind can see how he's shaking and crying without even realizing it. If you say "I love you" after that expect him to break down.

Kazutora, best way to manipulate this yandere hoe is like that, I feel like he turned so red and suddenly drank 247 energy drinks because he can't calm down or even go to sleep when remembering your words. Like do you actually mean that? Really? You love him that much? Is he even deserving of it? He was just about to let both of you rest but now his obsession got worse. Most definitely apologized for one or two hours and kept saying he loved you and would make sure you two lived as much as possible.

Izana, he might end up saying some "So you think I won't find you after we die? I'll drag you to hell with me if I have to!" But it's with a trembling voice and he's still tearing up cuz his abandonment issues are getting lowkey fixed. You wanna stay with him even after he's punished you so harshly? Of course you do, how could he doubt that you would want to die when you could live with him instead? Izana genuinely apologized for even bringing this up -ONE apology though- and he ended up giving you more privileges to breath after, probably began acting softer too.

Senju would have to be at a really low point in her life to ask that of you but you just made her do a 180 because this just confirmed you love her too right? Then as long as you want to live like that she will too! It's easy to escape her but if Senju managed to lock you down and you end up saying that to her??? Please get ready to be somewhat free again because she trusts that you love her and won't escape.

We also have Shinichiro, Chifuyu, Hakkai, Souya, Takemichi and Hinata who would fall for your words but they'd never try to do a double suicide cuz they don't want you to die or get hurt, especially not by them.

Naoto, Kakucho, Inui, Koko, Rindou, Emma, Yuzuha and Shion -Shion is kind of easily manipulated shush- would also never ask you of such a thing because they don't want to die when they have you in their life but there's a 1000% chance they fall for your words and become softer.

Meanwhile people like Draken, Ran, Mitsuya, Taiju, Baji, Muto, Nahoya, Mochi, Benkei and Kisaki are mostly moved by your words, like get that doki doki feeling but it probably was a test and you passed it with flying colors. They also don't trust you that well so nothing much changed other than they don't feel as suffocation as before.

With Hanma, Bonten Koko, Bonten Ran, Wakasa, Takeomi, South and Bad Toman Kisaki it definitely was a test and they don't believe you but are glad to know their punishments are working and you behave so well now/got Stockholm Syndrome.

[gildedmuse]

Hi I’ve been following you for a while, I love your work! Just wanted to say I hope you get well soon or at the very least you’re not in pain. It doesn’t matter to me what you post I’m just here to see the new content it’s all interesting/fun!

Ahh, so sweet. I got really, really sick for a while there guys - I haven't even seen any of the new episodes! - but I'm recovering nicely so hopefully I'll start post again in the next few weeks.

Let's see... Do you like All Hearts? I'm gonna assume most of the people following me are at least cool with the concept of Zoro as Law's first mate. Current obsession while in recovery: Taking fanart of the Heart Pirates doing just like, whatever, and turning it All Hearts-y.

For example:

[There used to be an image here, now there is not, because I suck.]

[This is where I got the image, and I am just going to hope that's the actual artist. Sometimes it's hard to tell on the internet. And if I'm wrong, someone should correct me so I can take it down or add proper credit. Also, they have no idea what's about to be inspired by their work, so, yeah, don't associate the poor artist with this.]

I tend to think Shachi and Law are the more cynical bastards and probably the more argumentive ones (specifically over plan details/minor analytical things), so I imagine they're in some deep, really impassioned Argument that is about something relatively innocent, maybe the best way to sneak past a navy blockade (Easy: submarine) And then sneak into the base unseen (less easy: pirates, all of whom are in jolly Roger marked uniforms, one of whom is a polar bear, another that uses three swords, and, oh, yeah, one with a WANTED POSTER showing off his VERY UNIQUE, EASILY IDENTIFIABLE DEATH TATTOOS) and they're ideas/debate is perfectability reasonable, but they do get very passionate about it. And it maybe doesnt always sound great.

Or at least, if you happen to not be listening to the whole thing because for some reason whenever you hear the words "... Highly effective plan so that our engagement with any actual Marines will be minimal and with no chance of any violent-" your brain just automatically starts tuning out

Or if you're just the kind of helpful pilot/officer who would help carry good from the kitchen as Hi-Ge finishes each dish to get it out at the table and so may have missed the bulk of the discussion

Then maybe parts of having Shachi and the caption passionately arguing about how, "this concern is over nothing, they're hardly his most recognizable tattoos"

"But they are the ones in the photos that were flown out to every Northern Island with your name splashed over them, captain. People are going to notice!"

"If you really think it's so much of a problem then we'll just get them a new photo of me to use. We just have to ensure these ones focus on drawing attention to my other, more eye catching markings."

"I'm sure if the posters promdominatly features those tattoos, not even the Marines would be looking at your hands, fair enough, but one week is hardly enough time to-"

"Are you doubting my ability to make so much trouble that quickly, my ability to force them into raising my bounty so soon, or that I can't guarantee the photos will contain said tattoos."

And Penguin KNOWS it's all innocent and it's just them hammering out details he just, well, Shachi never gets so worked up when THEY talk. Maybe because they never really argue? He's always happy to argue with Law though, even though Law is captain, And Shachi knows it's not arguing-arguing, obviously, since it's all about the plan and Law never gets, like, really bad either way though maybe it would be little nice if Law DID get upset some with Shachi every now and then for the arguments, just so maybe Shachi remembered how much nicer it is talking with someone who gets you and would never fight with him like that....

And Zoro - Zoro's mind has decided to jump back into the conversation because know he's wondering where and what those tattoos are that will take people's minds off Law's hands (he's not sure he believes it's possible, to be honest) and also how come Law seems to have no problem with SHACHI knowing all about them while Zoro is just left guessing and how come Law is trusting Shachi to come up with this plan? If he needs to get his bounty up, surely Zoro would be more help! not that Law really needs help finding or causing trouble, so then is the help he needs, does it involve these mystery secret tattoos and their a apparently very directing location and design? Shouldn't a first mate be told (and shown) these things?)

And so Penguin is standing there with the food bowl watching the two of them be all animated and smirking and plotting and wagging fingers wondering what's so great about it all anyway and Zoro is sitting there, head cocked, watching the same scene wondering why Law doesn't argue with HIM like that, the same way he takes Shachi seriously

And then finally looked Kit kind of coughs, mostly because just watching the two of them like that is getting embarrassing even if no one else has noticed because everyone is digging in while the food is still fresh (also, they definitely are going to START noticing since Penguin hasn't put down the new dish yet, and Kit doesn't wants to see Zoro get even more openly moony eyed over the captain when, like, he's just a kid and Law is a doctor (like Kit) and in his twenties (like Kit..... Will be in two and a half years) and doesn't really need Zoro mooning over him and as for Penguin, well, seeing him get all upset over something Shachi related if like when your sister cries because her "good guy friend" forgot it was their "special" hang out night. Like you know what it means but you don't want to have to think about it. Ever. At all.

It's just like the way Penguin is just standing there I immediately decided, oh, he MUST be thinking, "what if Shachi doesn't just, you know, respect the boss cause he's our captain. What if he like.... Likes him?" He just looks so left out, like he has no idea how to even insert himself into the debate.

The thought, ahh, of this was baby Zoro of COURSE he'd assume similar. Law got his wanted poster and Zoro wanted to kiss him and wasn't allowed, but he's happy boasting about the poster with Shachi, even planning the next one. Zoro is given the role of Vice Captain was like the most important office role right along with Navigator, but apparently it's really just like any other officer position. More importantly, it's doesn't suddenly make Zoro more important than Shachi, which isn't even what he wants because he likes Shachi, Shachi is cool (he just hadn't realized how much LAW liked Shachi, too)

Difference is I think Zoro eventually would, force himself into the conversation, after Kit catches their attention at least enough for Penguin to set the food down before like sliding into the seat next to Zoro, still just sort of staring (it's not his usual seat, he just kind of takes the nearest chair but after he does he figures it's probably a good thing, Law and Shachi are clearly, you know, preoccupied with their own discussion so it's good for Penguin to give them ro-

"I'm good with a den den mushi!" Zoro also knows that isn't Penguin's usual seat, because his usual seat is next to Shachi, and he imagines because Penguin is older and he knows all about like proper dates and stuff, he probably knows something like, uh, if two people who like each other are having a private conversation you give them room And don't interrupt so they can enjoy their time together. Penguin is usually right about that stuff so Zoro should probably do the same but, you know, they're talking about Law getting new wanted poster, right? Which will mean new photo - isn't like the the whole point? And it just so happens Zoro knows how to take den den images, and as vice captain obvious he needs to speak up so that they know this. For their plan.

And by speak up I mean almost shout it out, the way only an 15 year old with a crush who isn't paying attention to him really can; a way that makes everyone free,e, expect Eland who has to slap Bepo across the back to make sure he doesn't choke on the fish he'd been close to swallowing whole. Also, Puffin, who nearly sinks under the tableout of embarrassment by proxy before Marusa catches him to keep him still, and Hi-ge who peaks in from the kitchen.

Oh and Law and Shachi. They turn to look at him like everyone else but Shachi doesn't go completely still, first giving Zoro a confused look then tilts his head, giving Penguin a look that clearly means, "what, when did you start sitting all the way down there? Your seats not even taken, no one ever takes it because it's yours. What's going on, Guin? Are you being weird again? Could you at least tell me about what? It's not emotional, is it? You know I never get that stuff without your help...."

Where as Law just sort of looks at Zoro, then his eyes get all grey like a living storm - not a bad one, but one of the fun ones that sweeps you away in it, and his lips turns up in this half smirk-smile. Which admittedly isn't like a lot but has a lot of effects. Specifically on Zoro's stomach and also his mouth since words just sort of start flying out of it. "Back when I was a bounty hunter sometimes there were only these like two marine based around and if you just left the guy with them until some one further up the chain came along you'd never see a berry of that bounty, they wouldn't even buy you a skate why you waited. anyway, some older guy, he taught me this trick where you'd take a picture, you holding the wanted poster, and you sign it, then you'd get your guy -"

"Or girl," Beluxa tosses in like this is the time Zoro's trying to explain Law needs him to take the photo this is important!

"Or whatever holding that same poster, with your signature, and you'd catch a news coo and send it to the nearest big base they were gonna spend the guy for processing. So you could prove you caught h-them without having to find your way all the way to some hidden marine base.

Zoro's too in the moment too notice the various snorts and chuckles. Oh, no Northernern is naive enough not to believe the Marines have got some bases they're hiding up here, but they're also certain those kinds of bases aren't ones that just pay out bounties for some island outlaws some random unknown kid brings in.

Zoro is much more focused on how he is an idiot. He mentioned being a bounty hunter and he's always suspected that a lot of the crew didn't like that, now he's sure Law is one of them that doesn't because the second he mentioned that old guy who taught him this trick Law's smile slipped right away. But Zoro had already beaten them, and it's not like he really cared about keeping criminals out of the blue or getting a pat on the head from the Marines or whatever, but if he beat a guy shouldn't he get paid for it? "I needed the money and it worked so I bought this cheap image den den and figured out how to use it-"

"What? Like, pressing the button?" Shachi cuts in, chuckling as he mimics pressing down on the top of the shell. "Gee, good thing have an expert on board."

The remark might seem insulting but honestly, it's just sort of a joke, one Shachi is mostly telling Penguin, who doesn't look the leasf bit amused.

"He's just trying to help with the plan," Penguin answers, and he doesn't snap because Penguin doesn't really snap like that but it's close enough that quite a few looks are exchanged around the table. "He's an officer, too, it's normal he wants to be involved." Zoro actually sits himself up little straighter when Penguin mentions it, making sure he looks every one of his one hundred sixty eight cm.

"If you don't want any input or help, even from us other three," Penguin adds, not notifcing Zoro's posture shift of Shachis strange look, more focused on the small port window. "Why not save these discussions for Law's cabin? So we don't make the mistake again, and you two will be free to continue without even some minor, well meaning interruption to come between you two and your plan."

Zoro noticed none of it because Law has apparently decided to figure the whole bounty hunter thing because he's smiling again, elbows prompt on the table as he leans forward, like he's leaning in towards Zoro(!!) And smiling like that at him too (!!) He knew that Den Den trick would come in handy.Even though there is nearly a whole table between them, it really didn't feel like it when Law stared at him THAT way.

"Of course, Zoro-ya just wants to help." Law winks and Zoro's heart no his stomach no his throat - well somewhere in him something happens.

Winking! Winking is flirting! He knows it is! Lumikko told him himself and even Ikakaku agreed after a bit of disbelief (she apparently thought the guy's son at the junk yard they were scanvenging up for parts probably just got dust in his eyes and Lumikko was "messing with Zoro-kun, ad how many times do I have to tell you, just because YOUR easy doesn't mean that easy is considered fun by the rest of us." Then he did it again at the register, and did this weird thing where he asked Zoro his name a what he was doing on the Island - Ikkaku had been yelling his name plenty, was he not paying attention and seeing as he was carrying a box of used parts it's pretty obvious why he was here. Thought apparently according to Lumikko, the wink made them not stupid questions at all, more like riddles that Zoro had been MEANT to answer with, "Whatever you like, stranger," and "Oh, you know, taking in the locals, you wouldn't happen to know any worth taking would you?" Zoro still hadn't decided these.)

What Zoro DID understand was flirting meant winking, and since Law winked that meant!!

"Exactly, yeah, I just wanted to help - however you like stranger."

("Depths!" You could hear not only Ikkaku's hand connect with the back of Lumikko's head but also his ribs slamming up against the table with the force of if, and Ikkaku wasn't even bothering to whisper about see, see this is what happens when you're an idiot around Zoro-kun.)

Law doesn't seem to mind so Zoro doesn't really notice. (Oh, he definitely gives Zoro a look at the line but the chuckles and Law hardly ever like.... Laughs on any way so one of Zoro's various parts of maybe all of them this time do the thing again.) "Stranger? Is that what you're going to call me to the Marines when you're turning me over?"

Wait? Was that part of the plan? Zoro hadn't realized... Law is still smiling, and Zoro knows it's one of his honestly amused sort of grins so if he's still joking and flirting that means everything must be going according to the plan, or at least getting towards the plan at this stage, Zoro guesses. He just didn't remember when Law mentioned, "I wouldn't have expected such sneakiness for you, Bo-ya."

Zoro isn't sure what his captain means.

He doesn't notice, either, that Penguin is suddenly okay with Shachi, eyes wide as he makes a gesture for Shachi to please stop their boss before -

"Captain Roronoa Zoro has a fine ring to it, though. If nothing else I could not longer calm you Bo-ya, you would be more of a Tora-ya if-"

"I WOULD NEVER SELL YOU OUT TO THE MARINES!"

[Law honestly was just teasing Zoro, it's fine. I mean, he was a little suspicious of those older men going around teaching you tricks, but no he was just teasing you for your strange wording, that's all.... Not that it will stop Zoro from jumping to his feet and making this proclamation with all his heart.]

[amoristt]

Just a Dare | Nathan Prescott x Reader

@trueloveknifefight asked, Also can I request Nathan asking you out?

here u are! i love writing convos w nathan UGH i adore his character.

as always, replies and reblogs are greatly appreciated1 i check all tags and comments <3

wanna support me for just $3? here's my ko-fi!

The lights were bright, vivid. Almost blinding. They dance LED accents into the reflection of your drink- a dull plastic cup filled to the brim with one part whiskey, zero parts mixer. The taste could bring a tear to your eye but you would be damned to water down such fine alcohol, provided by none other than Nathan Prescott himself.

Music reverberated along the pool rooms walls, laughter and hollers distantly rising with the tempos. Your foot absently tapped to the beat- you were never one for dancing. Never one for parties, either, actually, favoring drinking in the solitude of a small friend group.

If not for Nathan you wouldn't be here at all. Some would say it's a privilege to slip past those heavy doors, entering the dully lit world of the Vortex Club. You mostly just felt like it was all for show. Somehow securing a place among Nathan's friend group, and a good friend at that, it was almost duty to show up. He insisted on it.

So, here you were. Leaning against a wall in a suffocatingly warm, cramped pool room surrounded by a sea of faces you hardly recognized.

That was, until you saw Nathan's face peer through the small break in shifting bodies. You knew him all too well.

Strikingly handsome, equally strikingly pompous. Funny, crude, an absent minded party goer just as much as he was a fireball with racing, incoherent thoughts. A drinker, a druggie. Takes the edge off, he says, but you think he does it to take away his thoughts completely. You felt like his entire life was all edges, never sacred ground.

The poor bastard.

He lures your attention in as he saunters over with squared shoulders, narrowly avoiding spilling his drink when a random student cuts it a little too close. Normally Nathan would make a bigger deal, give him what for, but this time he just shoots the poor kid a menacing glare and grumbles, 'fucking watch it'. He's walking with purpose and intent, you can see it on his face. You must have a target on your forehead as he darts straight over.

When he comes to your side, his own alcohol dripping down the sides of his cup onto his wiry fingers, you raise a brow.

"Something wrong?" You ask, as he takes a spot leaning against the hard wall right next to you.

"Just wondering why you're being so fucking lame over here," He shouts over the music, taking a sip of his drink, grimacing at the taste. "We're all having a good time over at the lounge and you're over here acting like all the other wallflower nobodies."

You roll your eyes with upturning lips. "Maybe I like being a wallflower. I like people watching. I see things no one else does."

"Yeah, okay, fucking weirdo."

"I mean it," You push off the wall and grin. "Look-" You point to a student obviously wasted, drink held high over head while he lets the music take him away. "That guy is clearly trashed- he's having the time of his life. He's gotta be seeing double."

Nathan whistles at his state, taking in the guys goofy smile, half lidded eyes. "I'll bet it's the triplets. I could breathe on him too hard and he'd fall over."

"You should go try it." You tease. He shakes his head and takes another drink.

"Nah, he'll get it himself. Guarantee we'll be dragging him out by his feet by the end of the night." He shrugs. "Or, at least someone will. I sure as fuck ain't staying that long."

You snicker. "What, got a hot date?" Nathan glares at you. "Oh don't tell me," you cup your hands to whisper, a secretive gesture, "homework?"

"Fuck no," He scoffs, and you can just barely see that he's a little more than tipsy now. His pale cheeks dusted with red, the tip of his nose ruby under the harsh lighting. It's also then that you realize he's a little more tense than usual, even despite the drinking. He's standing straight upright, his right hand gripping his cup like a crutch and his left now shoved hastily into his pocket.

He hasn't looked at you dead in the eyes yet.

"So what is it then?" You ask curiously. He shrugs and stares into his cup. You frown. "Bro, are you like, good right now? Do you wanna leave?"

For the first time since he'd wandered over, Nathan looks up at you. His eyes are unreadable, but his composure seems stressed. He shrugs again. Before you can even open your mouth to ask him about his state, he sighs and downs an entire mouthful of burning whiskey. It makes you cringe just watching him.

"Fuck it," He huffs. "Look I got some stupid ass dare to come over here and put the moves on you, okay." He sounds almost annoyed, like it's a hassle for him, or maybe embarrassing. You cross your arms. "I was dared to come over here and try to get you like, to fucking, you know, leave with me, but now that I'm over here I'm starting to think maybe that was a dumbass idea."

"Leave with you?" You say incredulously, a brow already lifting. "You were dared to come over here and try to sleep with me? By our friends?"

"No, no, fuck," Nathan seems agitated now, rushing. "Like a date sorta bullshit. Ask you out." He manages to get it out in almost the worst delivery possible, meanwhile you're just trying to pick out who would put him up to this. Hayden? Victoria?

A laugh forces its way out of you. "Aren't we a little too old for that game?"

Nathan shrugs. "That's what I said but they insisted. Fucking babies. At least make the dare a little more fun than just asking some bitch out. That's like elementary level shit."

Your eyes widen, you scoff. "Excuse me?"

Nathan sputters. "You're not some bitch, I didn't mean to-... Fucks sake, I'm clearly a little drunk right now okay, if you could cut me some fucking slack that'd be awesome."

"Hey man I didn't ask to be a victim of bullying," You tease, and he can't help but laugh. You soften. "Never expected it from you, though of all people. As ironic as that sounds."

"I'm not even bullying you, come on. Don't be a bitch. I even admitted it and everything."

You grin. "Yeah. Gotta say though, I'm a little disappointed."

"Oh what, you wanted to see my moves?" Nathan hums. "You wanted some Prescott action?"

"Shut the hell up." You shove his shoulder, an action that would be a mistake to so many others, but for you, it was welcomed. "I'm disappointed that it was just a dare. I'd probably have said yes if it wasn't. But, oh well."

Nathan doesn't answer for a long moment. First, he stares into his drink, processing. Almost like he hadn't heard that right, or like you were messing with him. It's rare to see Nathan Prescott stunned into a momentary silence. He's thinking, wondering what he should say next. Suspicious that you're just playing with him, hopeful that maybe you aren't.

And, you hadn't been. Truth be told if given the chance you would allow him to take you out for the evening. Show you fancy things, try out something a little more intimate than just laughter and poking fun at classmates together. You enjoyed his presence, looked forward to it at times.

A small part of you had hoped that he felt the same, maybe. Somehow. While grateful that he respected you enough to cut the crap before it even began, you couldn't help but feel a little... Disheartened at the prank. You'd saved your pride by denying him beforehand, but, if it had been genuine...

"So if it wasn't a dare," He began, quietly, barely audible over the booming music overhead. Eyes barely visible in the sea of vibrant lights crashing like waves. "You'd have said yes."

You shrug, trying to play it casual to save your own feelings, just in case. "Probably. I mean, we're already friends. We have fun so it couldn't have been that bad." He nods along to almost every word.

"Well what if we did it anyways." He blurts.

"Did what?"

"Go out tonight. Like, you know ditch this lame ass party and have some real fun."

"You love this lame ass party, and plus," You shake your head in feigned annoyance. "I'm not sleeping with you, Nathan."

He glares at you. "Fucking duh. I'm just saying we can go and hang out somewhere else. This party happens all the fucking time so it's not like we're missing anything."

"But, wouldn't that make me the butt of our friends joke?"

He shrugs. "Fuck em. It was a dumb dare anyways."

"Now it seems like you're trying extra hard to convince me to say yes." You state, and he's frazzled, running lines through his brain to try and save the absolute failure of asking you out. You decide to spare him, take a little leap of faith for yourself. "But, alright. I'm in."

Nathan gapes at you. "You're in?"

"Yeah, why not. I'm not busy right now and if you're not either than," You smile. "Why not. You better wow me though, Prescott. I'm talking a night to remember. Fireworks, dinner by candle light, a serenade. The whole package."

Nathan's eyes light up, but he tries to hide it, rolls those beautiful blues. "Well considering I've had like no fucking time to prepare how about we instead go to the roof and chill out."

You toss the idea around in your head for show. You already knew the answer the moment he asked if you were being serious.

"I mean I guess that would work," You say. "I was looking for fireworks but I suppose that will suffice. Feel free to go tell our buddies their joke may have backfired on them."

Nathan shakes his head. "Nah, don't even bother. They're all drunk and probably don't even remember daring me in the first place."

"Alright then," You push yourself off the wall, feeling your cheeks warm. A flutter takes wing in the base of your chest, your heart picking up just a little faster. You can't stop the smile that graces you as you say, "Lead the way, Prescott."

Nathan does lead the way. He takes your hand into his own, your fingers tracing over his boney knuckles as he drags you through the sea of bodies, out to the school hall and up winding stairs.

You giggle like a child when he struggles to find the correct key on the janitors ring he'd snatched weeks ago just in case, tease him when he almost spills his drink all over himself. Nathan's hands are almost shaking, but you chalk it up to the alcohol. You chalk everything up to the alcohol- his trembling fingers, his red face, a shy, albeit goofy smile resting upon his lovely, angular face.

The night was cool and crisp, a stark contrast to the smoldering heat of the Vortex Party.

He looks amazing out under the stars, and underneath the scope of the vast, black sky dotted with trillions of perfect, twinkling lights, you feel at peace.

Looking at him, you feel like this may be the start of something you'd denied yourself the chance of ever even imagining.

Out there, alone but together, hearing the echoes of music mixed with the livelihood of crickets in the darkness...

it truly was a night to remember.

-----------

Days later, you sit atop your desk, feet tapping rhythmically on your chair, typing away at your phone.

"Love the top," A familiar voice pipes, and you glace up to find Victoria standing before you, books pressed to her chest. She takes in your shirt, a nicely fitted long sleeve with a rather low cut v-neck. "Why haven't I see that one before?"

You shrug and set your phone down. "Never got around to wearing it I guess. Not a big fan of V-necks."

"It fits you," She sets her books down at the table beside you and brushes a hand through her hair, making sure every strand is in line. "I'll have to get one myself."

"You know what, you can have it after today," You say, and she perks up in disbelief. "As a thank you for what happened at the party."

That disbelief soon turned to confusion. "...Meaning?"

"Y'know, making Nathan ask me out. He made a whole huge deal about it- said you guys were drinking and playing Truth or Dare of all things. Gotta say, I was a little surprised."

Victoria's brows knit. "We hardly drank at that party, and I wouldn't be caught dead playing Truth or Dare. That game is for kids."

It almost knocks the wind out of you.

They hadn't even been playing in the first place.

As the teacher walks into the room, the first period bell blaring annoyingly over the speakers, you climb off your desk and prepare for the day, hardly able to contain yourself. It hadn't been a dare, after all.

And, you and Nathan's official second date was merely a day away.

[acciocriativity]

The bet || Harry Potter

Pairing: Fred Weasley and George Weasley x Platonic/Reader (Tiny not so tiny George Weasley x Reader)

Summary: You had a normal life at Hogwarts, until the Weasley twins decided they weren't going to leave you alone anymore, and what was the reason? You would give five galleons to anyone who knew the answer.

Word Count: 4,0k

It was still early, I was walking through the corridors towards the Great Hall when two red-haired figures appeared in my sight.

"Hey Y/N!", one of them waved cheerfully at me, I still had no idea which one. "Why do you suddenly look tall today?", the other said with a smile, which made me want to punch him.

"Why are you suddenly more annoying today? It sounds like a serious illness, so excuse me, I don't want to catch this", I walked as fast as I could so they couldn't keep up with me.

I could hear their laughter behind me and the whispering but decided not to pay attention to what was said, that would bring me more calmness.

And why do I basically run away from them? It is very simple.

One day I was just another Ravenclaw student, and the next day I had the attention of the most popular twins at Hogwarts.

They liked to tease me about absolutely everything, no matter if I was just sitting down reading or trying to concentrate in a class, one of them would find a way to annoy me.

I never tried to differentiate which was Fred and which was George, it made no difference, they both seemed equally annoying to me and knowing who is who was not going to guarantee me anything.

"Hey, wait. We have a deal for you", the tallest of them spoke with a grin plastered on his face as he walked up to me in stride.

"And why should I agree? Anything coming from you guys is pretty suspicious", I replied with my eyes screwed tight and crossed my arms.

"Because you can have your quiet time again, we won't tease you anymore as far as possible", the other said with a small smile and I stopped to think for a few seconds.

"Well, that sounds good enough, and what do I have to do? You're going to have to get something out of this, obviously", I still remained in the same position analyzing the two, who seemed to be enjoying themselves more every second.

"You'll have to guess who is who at the end of the day", one of them started and my face dropped at the same moment."Since we're nice, we'll just say it once", the other added.

"What if I don't succeed then? If there's a prank, I'm out."

"There won't be anything out of the ordinary, just an extra dose of us", I took a deep breath just imagining what my life would be like with these two following me around the castle. "So are you going to accept or not?", he raised an eyebrow.

I took a deep breath and looked away, a good opportunity had fallen into my hands but I would have the rest of my peace lost if I didn't win, which would be no small thing but a part of me was just screaming to accept it at once, the competitive part, the part that was going to win this little challenge.

"I accept, it won't be that hard", I replied with a smile, a wave of confidence built up inside me and I really thought it wouldn't be a problem at all.

"Okay then", they just walked past me and kept walking and if I could see my forehead, a big question mark would be hanging there, "Hey? You still have to tell me which is which, it was part of the deal", I said, taking a few steps behind them but they soon stopped and looked at me.

"Oh, you're so confident, do you really need us to tell you who's who?", I clenched my hands tightly to hold back the urge to kill him.

"Of course I don't need to but... HEY!It's not polite to leave a person talking alone", they had the audacity to walk off and wave at me on top of that.

7:30 a.m.

I wasn't going to get any help from them, why did I expect to get any? Obviously they don't want me to win but I will and they will have to swallow that. That's my new goal today, screw the herbology paper.

But now it would be more difficult, few people would know the difference, I would have to ask one of his friends or one of the other Weasleys who studied at Hogwarts.

I wasn't intimate with any of them but I had classes with some, we never spoke but I will change that today.

I just hope they actually tell me something useful, one of the twins could have easily told no one to help me and made everything even more difficult.

8:25 a.m

"Hey Kate, what's up?", I said with a smile just as she was about to pass me down the hall, it was really worth it to eat fast or I wouldn't have made it in time.

The expression on her face already told me everything, the same gleam in her eye that twins have when they are disturbing me, why do I get the impression that it won't be so easy?

"Good morning Y/N, do you need anything?", she said leaning against the wall with a mischievous smile that I chose to ignore. "Actually yes, you should already know, the Weasleys challenged me to set them apart and you as a friend should know how, anything is useful, anything really", I liked that she was direct because I could be too. I don't like wasting time with small talk, especially when I don’t have too much time.

"They actually told me it would happen, but they didn't tell me more details, what happens if you lose? Some kind of prank I bet.

"They will annoy me twice as much as they already do, I don't know how you manage to be friends with them, she stared at me for a few seconds and then grinned. "What?"

"I'll help you since you're asking me but maybe you'll soon see that it wouldn't be so bad to lose", I just nodded without really believing it would happen. "Fred is louder and generally more annoying, George is quieter and more careful. You can find out more by noticing for yourself, I'm going to get going, I want to practice a little before class begins", she pointed to the castle entrance.

"Thank you so much Kate, I'll owe you this one. See you later", I smiled and waved as she walked away from me after waving as well.

Now I know the basics but they might try to trick me, switch places or pretend to be the other one. I have to be prepared and there is only one way.

9:00 a.m

The bell rang and the halls filled with heads hurrying not to be late, especially the poor first year students heading for the dungeon. I could see some shaking on the way out of the Great Hall but my destination was completely different, I headed up the stairs along with the other forty years to Minerva's class.

There was no sign of any of the twins, if they had decided to skip this class my plan was destined to fail.

The class was about to start when the two of them entered without any hurry and I smiled internally for having kept an empty chair next to me, just in case.

"Are you gentlemen having a problem with your audition? The bell rang five minutes ago. This kind of behavior is not tolerated, Mr. Weasleys. Minus ten points for Gryffindor", her angry voice boomed, and no one seated dared to breathe.

"It won't happen again, professor", I was surprised not to hear any funny remarks as a comment and I'm sure she was too but didn't show it.

"Sit down and open your books, let's move one more step forward from yesterday's lesson...", she continued talking but I barely paid attention after one of them sat down next to me.

"So, you're George, you can tell me now that I already know", he looked a little surprised for a few seconds but soon regained his posture.

"How did you guess it? I didn't even say anything", he said looking at me intently and I just shrugged, I wasn't about to say since this is clearly a plus for me.

"That's a secret that will stay with me, it wasn't that hard", I commented, dipping my quill into the ink to start writing what Minerva was going over on the blackboard.

Behind us it was possible to hear Fred's excited whispers that I had learned to ignore after all these years. Now it seemed so much easier, it's not as if I hadn't noticed them both all this time, it's a bit impossible since they make themselves present everywhere.

We remained silent, since this is the only way I can concentrate. I even mentally thanked him for that, but it didn't seem to do any good today. My attention kept being drawn to the red-headed boy next to me, I couldn't help it.

Internally I blamed it on my will to win, because to do so I would have to pay more attention to him, that's all my body wanted to do, focus on George Weasley.

I only realized that I was crossing the line when I noticed that his cheeks started to take on a reddish tint and a shy little smile appeared. To make matters worse, there was Fred's giggles, who was watching everything with the best view; there was no way I could get away with this.

After this awkward moment, I forced myself to pay attention even though my desire was to get out of there, since he now decided to start watching me not as discreetly as he thought he was being. I was much better at that.

"Is there a problem?", I mustered up the courage to ask when it was already 15 minutes before the bell rang again.

I noticed him bite his lips and crack a small smile before looking forward again, "why would there be a problem?"

"You were looking at me", I answered quietly so as not to draw attention from the other students and especially from Minerva who was passing between the desks checking to see if everyone was practicing the spells correctly.

"You were looking at me before that, discretion is not your specialty, you know?", I was a few seconds without knowing how to answer that and in the meantime, I could see him savoring the fact that he had left me speechless.

"Yes, I was watching you to differentiate you better from your brother, and why were you looking at me?", I spoke in a direct tone looking him straight in the eyes and the other redhead's laughter sounded behind us and George gave him a nonchalant look, as did the woman, who had just passed us.

"Is something wrong Mr. Weasley?", she asked and of course, everyone around us had to pay attention too, because they had nothing else interesting to do.

"No, I just remembered a joke I heard, I could tell you if you want. I assure you it is very funny", he assured holding back the urge to laugh even harder.

"Your little jokes stay outside the room Mr. Weasley, and you all, if you haven't perfected today's transfiguration can get back to work", she caught everyone's attention and continued walking peacefully.

We ended up getting distracted from the main subject, he obviously took the chance of not answering me and just kept on training as I did.

12:00 a.m

We had the next 3 classes together and I stayed close to them and their friends as well. As I imagined everyone was very nice to me, we could have become friends much sooner if we weren't stuck in a fixed group of friends.

Some things had become much clearer in my head and others even more blurred. They didn't seem to be picking on anyone but me, although it hadn't happened all day. Then why? I was going to find out.

"Will you come sit with us today?", Katie said with an arm around Angelina's shoulders, both looking at me with a smile that wouldn't let me deny them anything.

"Sure, I'd love to. It's kind of funny that we have more things in common than I expected", I remarked as we walked slowly, with the hasty crowd in front of us. I would usually be with them but it's much better this way, time is not as important as catching up with everyone.

"I had no idea you liked quidditch, have you thought about joining the Ravenclaw team?", Angel, as she asked to be called, inquired and at that moment, I should but I didn't notice her gaze leave me and go to the twins, several times.

"I'm not as good at playing as I am at watching, so I prefer to stay in the stands", I replied with a small smile until I noticed everyone in that small group communicating with their eyes, which I chose to ignore.

"So Angeli, since when did you start playing?", I started the subject that was going to last throughout the entire lunch hour and it couldn't be better.

Everyone had some story to tell, I must admit that Fred's and George's were the funniest. At no time was there any kind of awkward silence, or a moment when I was not included in the conversation. I did notice that some of my classmates were surprised that I sat there, but in general they were looking at us because of the noise. Their special talent was talking, which I found refreshing since I could hear more and talk occasionally.

The worst part of it was that I ended up not paying as much attention to either George or Fred as I had planned, although now I know a little more about both of them and my new friends.

3:00 p.m.

After two classes of Aritmancia, I had a free period and many homework assignments to do and as I walked to the library, a familiar voice called out to me.

"Y/N!", I turned around and was faced with George and his broom near the stairs, not so far from me, "We are going to practice a little, do you want to come too?", I was about to say no, as I was already busy but then I remembered, I still had to guess who was who at the end of the day.

I had really forgotten and started to enjoy their company, I had to remind myself that I wanted to win and that it made perfect sense to spend some more time with him, if it meant that I could guarantee it. Or at least, I tried to convince myself of that.

"Sure, who else will be training?", I asked as I walked over to him and then we walked together to the castle entrance and towards the field. "Just Angelina and Fred, the others have classes or something to do," and I just nodded in agreement.

We hadn't spent any time alone since Transfiguration class and I didn't know what to say, as did he but I didn't feel uncomfortable, just lost in my own thoughts.

"You came to watch half the best quadribol team play today. You won't regret it," Fred was the first to speak up as soon as we arrived and I could only laugh, how could one person be so confident? I needed some tips.

"My expectations are higher than you Weasley, you better not let me down after that speech," I wasn't trying to be funny but I heard a chuckle come from the redhead next to me. "You're not out of it George, none of you. But remember, no pressure. I'm only going to judge a little bit," I said smirking, not really taking any of the words I said seriously.

"Go sit down and prepare to be impressed," the black haired girl gave the last words, grabbed her own broom and flew to the three right hoops as I hurried to the stands.

Luckily, I didn't miss much and less than 5 minutes later, I could tell with certainty how good the three were. They took turns as goalkeepers for Angelina, even though it wasn't really their position in the game.And after 15 minutes, the dynamic changed for the two of them to try to hit her, one at a time, for them to practice as beaters.

But honestly, I paid much less attention than I normally do. I couldn't tell them apart from so far away, and this realization made me face the shameless excuse I had created for myself. I just wanted to be there, and the reason for that I wouldn't say out loud.

More than 30 minutes later, the three of them instead of landing on the ground, came flying towards me and stopped by my side.

"So you can talk about how impressed you are now", I pretended to think for a few seconds and the indignation on his face was so funny I almost didn't say it but after such an arduous training like that, they deserved it.

"You guys were amazing, if someone from another house could watch the official training sessions I would really come to see more", I smiled and it was extremely adorable to see George's already red face redden even more after my compliment.

"You already know you can't watch the official practices, we are finally starting to understand each other", Fred said and took a step to hug me and I immediately took one back. "You're soaking wet Fred Weasley, don't even think about it. This is not the time for hugs".

"But I think it's a good idea sweetie, you can't hide from a Weasley, so just accept it", he said with an evil grin on his face and I was ready to run, I hated sweat especially when it wasn't mine but his long legs came into action once again.

"That's the most disgusting thing I've ever experienced, so you have something to be proud of after all", I complained, pulling away seconds after he had cornered me in the hug, which wouldn't have been so bad if it had been any other time.

"If that's the grossest one, you really don't know what's waiting for you honey. This is just the beginning," Angel said with a satisfied smile on his face. "But we better go now, I need a shower and we still have one last class today," she added and flew out of there after waving to us.

"Yeah, I need to take a shower too, I'll see you guys later," Fred said before getting out of there as quickly as possible, leaving me alone with George again.

"Well, do you want a ride? It's much quicker to get down that way," he smiled slightly at me and I agreed without a second thought.

I held his bare arm, because I thought it was better than hugging him and regret appeared immediately because I always had some issues with flying. It wasn't the worst thing in the world but it was far from being one of my favorites.

All I could do was close my eyes as we crossed the field, my hands automatically closed around his arm, the weather was windy and I could feel the shivers that went through his now red skin as well as mine.

It was a few seconds if I'm really honest but it didn't feel like it to me, I've never picked up a broom other than for classes and it's been a long time since I stopped having fun in those classes.

I was brought out of my thoughts when I felt my feet on the ground again.

"I'll see you later then, I haven't forgotten about the bet. You better be prepared," he gave me a beautiful smile and the consequences of that is the only thing I wasn't prepared for.

5:00 p.m.

There are those moments when you have to stop and ask yourself, what the hell is happening to me? For countless reasons obviously, and it was my turn. I didn't come up with any answers that made me blind to reality, which was really frustrating because that way it would be easier for me to just ignore.

But nobody told me it was going to be easy, which is a shame because I would have someone to blame.

All this played out in my head before I received an owl from them, telling me that I could go to the Gryffindor common room to finish our bet, along with the password for the day. I was prepared after being warned by basically all their friends, all I could think of on the way there were some spells, mainly revenge because I wouldn't let it go if there really was a prank.

But what happened was quite different, the place was quieter than I imagined, although they had many people sitting and talking normally including Fred and George.

"Oh hello stranger, you have finally decided to give us the honor of your presence, I can say for everyone, we are all grateful," I had barely stepped into the room when Fred spoke up with the most sarcastic smile I have ever seen, should I be confused?

"If I get all this reception every time I come here, I will definitely come back more often. Thank you, I feel very welcome," I said with an equally big smile, causing him to roll his eyes.

"Okay smartass, it's time for your answer," he continued speaking, the same voice but now that I was close, in front of them, I noticed that there was something very wrong there.

"Why are you talking like that George?", was my only thought, they were imitating each other, the voice was extremely similar, I could never tell the difference just by that, but looking at him, it is impossible to be mistaken.

Their expression dropped on the spot and I realized that there were more people watching me and maybe they knew the plan, because everyone was a little shocked too, was it that simple?

"That's impossible, who was the snitch that told you? Whoever it was, you're going to have a tough future," Fred even stood up and didn't bother to do another voice, he spoke and I was sure I won.

"Nobody told me, I didn't need much to realize that you guys were faking it. He spent the whole conversation scratching his arm, it's been like that all day," I pointed to George who had not taken his eyes off my person so far.

At that moment they looked at each other for a few seconds and then back at me. I should be happy but I wasn't. Even if I wasn't going to admit it out loud, they just proved to me how amazing they are and I wasn't going to lose that.

"Now that I've won, I want to change my reward. It's very simple, I want to reverse the reward and the punishment. I want an extra dose of Weasleys," I had to get a certain amount of shyness out of the way to say this but it was worth it.

It was worth it because I could see a sparkle in both of their eyes that went beyond a successful prank, it was worth it because I had the best years at Hogwarts with the best friends I could ever want. It was worth it because I found the best boyfriend in the world that day. I never thought I would be so grateful for a silly bet.

Harry Potter Masterlist

[pt-disconnected]

Anonymous Ask Responses #14

I'm back after a good chunk of a spring break, and I should probably get all these asks in my inbox out before I get the next story part out. Might help some, haha. And again, sorry for the delay. I feel bad for continuing these delays over and over. Maybe for once I can actually get back on the ball.

As usual, any non-anonymous asks will have a tag for the person who asked. The title has just... become a title at this point. ^-^;

————————

"Oh boy! Toriel’s going to meet player" Yup, that she is! Whether that's good or bad is yet to be seen, but who knows... We'll have to find out.

————————

"Lol Susie is all of us with this fic" Pretty much. Unfortunately, filler segments are not very appealing in a story, and as such I want to keep them low in number. There will be some- trust me, there's bits and pieces that are pretty much guaranteed to be filler- (cough cough) character interactions that I will not specifically mention (cough cough) but filler is a lot harder to have in a text story than it is to have in a comic. Sorry, Susie.

————————

"That reminds me, we still don’t know about what happened to all the other humans" Good point! We learn what happened to Gaster/Knight, and we see glimpses of the other humans, but there's no telling for sure what they think. All we see is Gaster/Knight and what he says- and he's pretty twisted. So he might be planting ideas of the remaining humans in the bunker being angry when they really just want some pecking fresh food. I mean, I'd get sick of canned, preserved food if I had to eat it for 66 years and 162 days straight. Give me a burger or something, peck it all. And now I'm actually hungry. Great.

————————

"Wait kris didn’t tell Susie and noelle about asriel’s secret diary enteries?" Upon further review, you just mentioned something I completely missed! I'll have to find some way to touch on that or incorporate that into the story somehow, thanks for mentioning it! TL;DR: Kris didn't tell Susie and Noelle about the diary entries because I did a forgor and didn't think about that, and now my brain wants to use that for plot purposes.

————————

"Insert doctor who meme about time travel here"

It has been inserted.

————————

"Did player play undertale?"

Honestly? I can't say for sure... that's a good question, though in the end that means we have to assume not. It's annoying but there's not much I can do there...

————————

@prhthezanko: "I like how the player is somewhat avoiding Toriel, but does the player know of the "Incident" that happened? Or is it intuition that another human around would cause issues?" It's mostly intuition- Player's SOUL wasn't in the Light World to see the chat between Toriel and Sans, and since there's literally no other humans during the whole of both Deltarune Chapter 1 as well as the Paper Trail comic, it's clear that there's no humans for some reason. So seeing another one... probably would be concerning, for some reason or another.

And if the event is taken into account, it makes it all the more concerning...

————————

With that last question finished, my inbox is now clear of asks and I can now get back to writing the story of Disconnected. I'm looking forward to getting the interactions of the next chapter into play, and seeing how it goes! (And hopefully this one doesn't take weeks to write... blegh...) As usual, make sure to check out Lynx's stuff, as well as the other Paper Trail fan-stuff! I can't stress enough that this blog isn't meant to be a solid continuation, but rather one of many different 'stories' that we create upon the end of Paper Trail, much like Gaster says. Because for as much of a peck neck he is, he's also quite smart- and he is right. We don't like leaving stories on cliffhangers. So we make our own to fill the gaps.

So please check out the other stories and content, and see how others fill the gap in their own way.

With that said and done, I'll see you all soon, whenever the next part is released!

[aros001]

Going in blind: Watching season 1 for the first time. Random thoughts.

This show is kind of nice because I have no memories of the original She-Ra show, or even any of He-Man, honestly. I'm not sure if I ever watched the original, so I have no frame of reference for how the series is "supposed" to be. I can just take it and judge it as is.

Of the bat, all I know is that supposedly She-Ra and Catra get together as a romantic couple later, but I'm also a huge My Hero Academia fan and the fandom around me ships every character with every other character, so for all I know that might just be shipper wishful thinking I've been seeing and hearing. Given fandoms for Gravity Falls, Thor, and Supernatural ship even siblings together, I've learned not to trust anything except for what I see in the series for myself.

By the way, this isn't a review, just random thoughts and comments I'm having as I'm going through season 1 for the first time.

Episodes 1 and 2: Right off, I really like Catra's "No duh" response to Adora about the truth of the horde. She knows they've been lying to them and have been doing terrible things, she just doesn't care. If she and Adora play their cards right they could end up being the ones in charge and then they'd have all that power. Not necessarily to make things better but enough to where they could do whatever and live however they want. That's a good build for an antagonist. Not ignorant to the fact what they're doing is wrong, just simply so selfish that they don't care.

Episode 3: It really feels like there was no good reason why Glimmer didn't just outright introduce Adora to her mother and every reason she should have known it was a bad idea to try and hide her for a surprise. Being a former horde soldier she'd probably get treated with hostility if Glimmer brought her to the front gate but you'd almost guarantee Adora would get arrested or outright killed if she got caught while no one else knew she was there.

On the other side, we have Hordak being pretty intelligent in promoting Catra. He probably knows Shadow Weaver already doesn't like him, so it's not like he's losing anything making her upset with him, and it's clear she favors Adora way more than Catra, so that little bit of advancement towards Catra probably goes a long way in earning her loyalty to him and a person on the inside with Shadow Weaver.

Also, I'm not the only one who saw Madam Razz and immediately thought Adora had found her Yoda, right?

Episode 4: I don't know how it was in the original She-Ra and He-Man series but I kind of like She-Ra being this title from legend. Adora is not the first She-Ra, given what Razz was talking about with a Mara, so instead of being something new, impressing everyone with abilities they've never seen before, and creating the legend, Adora is placed in a position WAY over her head where she's having to live up to what came before her.

Episode 5: Calling it now, as long as her personality is genuine I think Scorpia is going to be one of my favorite characters in this show. She's...endearing, I think is the best word. She's like a mix of Kronk and a nicer Shego.

For a little bit I thought Mermista was voiced by the same actress who played Poison Ivy in the Harley Quinn animated series. She's not but they do have the same kind of Daria-ish inflections, thus by confusion. Given the prom episode, Sea Hawk feels kind of like her Kite Man.

Episode 6: Okay, now it's between Scorpia and Entrapta who are likely to be my favorites by the end of this. She's fun and quirky.

Episode 7: Quite the lore drop. Shadow Weaver was once a Mystacor sorceress known as Light Spinner. I like to imagine we'll get more on that later. Her haunting Adora reminded me of the Teen Titans' episode where Robin was similarly haunted by Slade. This didn't go as far as that but that's probably for the best, since TT had two and a half seasons to build that dynamic up with Robin and Slade while we're only now halfway through the first season.

Episode 8: Well dang. Again, I don't know for sure if Adora and Catra do end up together but boy do I buy why they're shipped together after that dance. Also, good on Bow for standing up for himself. It's clear that he'll always be Glimmer's friend and this won't change that but that doesn't mean he has to just accommodate her. I understand where her issues stem from but I am still glad he gave her a reality check. It helps him feel a little more like his own character.

Also, another nice little bit of lore and worldbuilding. Scorpia's a princess, the horde landed where her people lived, and they seemed to join them willingly.

Episode 9: Surprisingly don't have a lot to say about this other than I don't buy for a second that Entrapta is dead (EDIT: She's not). This was mostly action.

Episode 10: Not going to lie, this one kind of annoyed me a little, at least the first half. The conversation between Glimmer and her mother saved it a bit. It was a bit of a trifecta. You have the alliance breaking apart, saying that the loss of Entrapta only happened because they were all together...even though Entrapta only "died" because of her own machine obsession that caused her to deliberately walk back into the purging chamber. You have Entrapta who might be turning to the horde's side because she feels abandoned by the other princesses...even though they thought she was dead, and again it was her fault they got separated. And you have Glimmer refusing to tell her mother that Shadow Weaver's dark magic has caused her powers to go on the fritz and is causing her great pain. It just feels like none of this would be an issue if most of these people would stop being self-absorbed for three seconds and talk like any normal person would. It feels very CW drama, like something I'd see in a bad season of Arrow or The Flash. The only person whose issues I buy is Adora, who is basically a soldier who was never properly raised to deal with emotion or loss and is already struggling with the burden of being She-Ra, the legendary savior. I get why she's beating down on herself for not being able to do more even if nothing that happened was her fault.

Episode 11: JEEEEEEEEEZZZZ, that was such a good episode! Focused entirely on Adora and Catra and their past together. Like, just showing someone this episode alone could probably get them to want to watch the series. That was everything you needed to know about their dynamic and history together.

Also, that moment when Catra and her past self are looking at each other, while obviously Catra takes the opposite lesson, it reminded me of this fanart I'd once seen of Jason Todd, the Red Hood, looking at his past self as Robin. The past says to the future "You ruined everything". Catra could be happy but, ironically for someone who hates Shadow Weaver, she's probably going to be a lot like her, sacrificing everything for power and ambition.

Given the way she looked, I'm guessing Shadow Weaver is either addicted to the power of the Black Garnet or she suffered some kind of past injury and its power is the only thing keeping her going. Or both.

Episode 12: I'll be honest, Swiftwind being able to talk kind of gobsmacked and I needed a moment to recover. What a great voice they chose for that character.

So She-Ra is kind of like the legendary heroes from Rising of the Shield Hero, coming from a long line of people chosen to wield the sword. I tend to dislike chosen one types of stories because I think prophecy takes a lot of weight out of the character's actions, so this and Avatar are more what I like. The MC is special but not the only one who's ever been special and they can still easily fail. Their destiny was only to be able to use the weapon, not that they would succeed in any specific purpose.

And dang, Catra's turn against Shadow Weaver happened faster than I thought it would but I'm not complaining. That great "This is what you've really been preparing me for" speech and Hordak, again, being an intelligent villain. "Oh, this experiment could net me a MASSIVE gain and all it could potentially cost me is this rock I already gave away to someone who lately hasn't been producing any results and has been consistently disobeying me. Yeah, I'm going to let this play out."

Episode 13: That was kind of a brutal fight between Adora and Catra. Not the worst I've ever seen even in other shows for this age range (Samurai Jack, for example) but those punches are connecting and those claws are leaving marks.

Also, maybe I'm just misunderstanding the exact situation but shouldn't the good guys' side be called the Resistance instead of the Rebellion? Being a rebellion would imply they are rebelling against an established power or rule over them, but the actual conflict we are shown is the established power and rule that is the kingdoms of Eternia resisting an outside force that wishes to establish a new order over them.

Season 1 verdict: I'm into it. I'm definitely more invested in the villains' side of things but that's not a fault of the series, that stuff is just way more geared towards me than the current princess stuff. I actively am at attention whenever the horde main characters are on screen. For the good guys it's mostly Adora and the She-Ra stuff I'm invested it. That isn't to say I have any real dislikes for that side. Bow especially I'm liking much more than I thought I might. He has kind of this gravitational pull around him. You will be his friend regardless of how much you might want to resist. He's definitely the rock for everyone else to hold onto.

Minor side note, kind of like Korra in Legend of Korra, I love how even when her powers aren't active Adora is shown to still be pretty strong physically with how easily she was lifting people up at the prom.

And I was right, Scorpia is my favorite side character.

On to season 2!

Original Reddit post: https://www.reddit.com/r/PrincessesOfPower/comments/nyll2e/going_in_blind_watching_season_1_for_the_first/

[shewhowillnotbenamed1]

Synergy - Part 2

Part 1

This is Part 2 of the first DamiRae I ever wrote... And it is long overdue. @ravenfan1242​ Happy belated birthday!!!

Prompt List

---------

Figures.

A dark brow flew up as Damian motioned for Raven to board the plane ahead of him. Therein lay another poorly packaged excuse to check out her ass or legs. She had already caught him tonight.

Twice.

Ignoring a prickle of panic, the heels teetered her up the stairs. But moments later, the blinds drew up around a pale face at the window. Narrowed blue-violets scanned the tarmac, observing the animated conversation in Arabic. After he finished up with the attendants, long legs lifted him onto the jet with an irritating amount of ease.

Instead of taking a seat, Damian excused himself to prattle on some more. This time with the pilot.

A slew of impatient texts rapidly fired off to Beatrice. As more time was allotted to Damian, Raven increasingly relied upon her assistant. Since the initial meeting, they'd had over a handful of dinners. Accounting for flights and travel time, she'd probably been with him in the last month more than she had anyone.

As she typed, she glanced down at her blue-black nails with concern. Another side effect of breaking out of usual patterns - a lot of time between nail appointments. Although her veneer was overall impeccable, there was but the slightest crack breaking through to the surface.

An alabaster neck craned subtly in the direction he had disappeared to. She wasn't eager for his return or anything trite like all that.

But really, where was he?

He was certainly taking a while.

Did he think his time was more valuable than her own? They had barely discussed work when they were together. So what was to be accomplished between them, really? What was Damian trying to do - actually get close to her?

Suddenly, the familiar shuffle of Brioni loafers left her to ponder these deceitful thoughts no longer.

Finally.

Raven gave his olive-green sweater and black trousers a once-over. The hue managed to contrast with his dark skin in a distracting way, while simultaneously bringing out the color of his eyes, an arresting vert.

It was undeniable and utterly unfair for someone so aggravating to look like that.

Stupid, sexy Damian...

"Wayne. Thanks for dinner. You do have great taste." Raven noted. "I was skeptical about the use of your plane to take me to a ranch in Montana, but it was the best burger I've ever had..."

A hardened jaw slackened at her assessment. "Glad it was up to your standards, Roth."

"So far." Raven backtracked. "The best burger I've had so far." She couldn't concede completely.

"Tch..." He clicked his tongue in the way he did. "Next time, we'll swing by the coast and maybe get some ceviche..." Damian began, telling her what her future plans would be with an air that stunned and excited her. And he sat beside her, all the while moving closer to her, her hand laying on her cheek. "Or we'll do a weekend trip. Get some poke at this little stand on the side of the road in Hawaii -"

"Wait..." Raven held up a hand, recoiling slightly. Her indigo eyes flashed. "Damian?"

Damian let out a humorless laugh. "Is something wrong? Is it the fish? We have had sushi twice."

"No, not wrong...exactly." The pale girl worried the rose-colored skin of her lip.

"Alright, then." With that, Damian leaned back in his seat.

"What are you doing?" The man turned to her as if she was crazy.

"I thought I was having a good evening." His jaw was no longer loose, it tensed. Twitched. "What is it now, Roth? Do you have a problem? Or an itch?"

That patronizing attitude only confirmed her need to keep their distance.

"Just one." A pale finger gestured to the top of the sleek, white leather and polished cherry wood cabin. "Why are you sitting so close to me?"

His lips pressed into a hard line. "It's my plane. I'll sit where I want." Damian said definitively, offering no other explanation.

He was so irritating in that way.

"It's a large enough plane to comfortably seat twenty - at least." Raven tried. "Surely you can sit somewhere else besides next to me?"

The deep voice was barely inflected and unwavering. "I want to sit here."

"Your legs are longer than mine - that one has more leg room." Raven pointed across the aisle. "And you'd have the adjacent seat for even more room."

"Hmm. Still, no. I'm sitting here." The calloused hand tapped the arm of the seat, slowly, one thick finger at a time.

Raven gritted her teeth. "Damian, please."

"Make me."

"Make you?" Raven blinked rapidly.

She could barely believe the words she was hearing him speak aloud.

"Yes." The white teeth sparkled brilliantly against his deep skin. "If you want me to move so badly, why don't you make me?"

"Oh, I see." Raven smirked. "Are you finally making the change from a man-child to an actual child?" She retorted with her arms folded. "Long overdue, if you ask me."

"Yes, Raven," Damian echoed. His tone grew steadily more self-righteous. "I'm a child. And this child can sit anywhere he wants on his "PJ"."

"No. I am not going to stand for this." There were some things that were inexcusable. And this was one of them. "I know it's yours, but please - never call it that again. It's a private jet. It is not a PJ -"

Damian continued his tirade, as if she hadn't spoken. "And this child wanted his apartment, but of course you had to have your way there, as well."

Here we go.

Was this whole maneuver some ploy to seek petty revenge? "Fine." Raven retorted. "You like your planes and your cars, but Damian: Why won't you just find another apartment?"

"I'll have you know, I do have other things I desire - things that are not solely materialistic." Damian appraised her openly and received a series of smoldering embers. "And for the record, I have found a place..."

"Well, good." Raven mumbled. "That's great..." She tried again, but she was overtaken by an odd sense of loss. "Really great." The apartment was a source of guaranteed discord between them; it was something they bickered about consistently. And though she was happy for him, they had built up a rapport on top of this (supposed) slight. What would become of their banter without a collective source of contention? "Was yours also your first?"

"My first...?" He curiously searched her. "The first apartment I bought on my own - yeah." With the lessening of crackling static, the air in the cabin had begun to shift.

"Congratulations..." Raven offered. "Our firsts, they're always milestones..." And she swallowed. "So, I guess we can move on."

Damian repeated wistfully, "you want to move on from this?"

"Yes." The pale girl exhaled, relaxing her posture a fraction. "You lost the place you wanted initially, but maybe this one will be better?" She flicked the arm of his seat coyly. And Raven couldn't resist the compulsion to get one last dig at Damian. "Though, I doubt it." She hissed. "Second. Place."

"There." Damian growled, as if she had proved his point. "It's because of that..." He paused. "You say you want to move on, but you don't." Then he sighed, carving a rough hand harshly through his hair. "I - want so badly to like you, Roth. But, you just can't resist pushing my buttons. And gloating."

"I don't gloat, I'm confident." Raven spat. "And confidence comes from knowledge and experience, not arrogance." She was a CEO after all.

"Alright, bravado is good in business..." Damian licked his lips. "But, does that over-inflated ego satisfy you at the end of the night when you're alone in your office?"

Her dark bob shook at the lecherous undertone. "What are you getting at, Wayne -"

"You alone in your office, Roth..." His voice, it had gone dark and decadent. "Sliding off your Jimmy Choos under your desk and sinking back into your chair... To slip a hand up your thighs under one of your tight pencil skirts..." An angry flush was rising on a pale face. But her body warmed at his words, as it, like her eyes, found Damian a pleasurable point. And it too betrayed her. "Or how about in bed? I bet when you finally lay yourself down on top of those thousand thread count sheets, it's just you and your bloated ego. Does it manage to keep you warm at night?"

"Actually, yes. It does. But, thank you once again for your overly-invested concern." It was true about her ego. But if it ever didn't, she had a steady rotation of men to do it for her. "If you think you're going to shock me, you can't." She deadpanned. "Think about me alone, quite a bit, Damian?"

"You didn't answer my question..." The beautiful smile was cruel. "Raven, I'm not talking about the... uh, toys you've collected to keep you warm. I mean, have you ever had a real relationship?"

"Are you prying to prove a point?" Raven raised a brow. "In case you were asking "for a friend", you should know that, I have."

"I find that hard to believe." Damian scoffed.

As if.

"I think you're... projecting." Her heartbeat surged as she countered. "Wouldn't be the first time."

"There's that misdirected overconfidence making you assume things again."

"Misdirected? No, I think... you've never been in a relationship." Damian glared, she could even see his nostrils flare. "No... I know you haven't. You wanted to find out if I had been though... You've also mentioned, what did you call them... my toys - several times before now. So the question is why?"

"It's not as a big deal as you're making it." He rolled his eyes and settled back into his plush seat, facing away from her. "You're delusional."

Damian wanted to end this; he knew he was going to lose. But Raven was not going to end this. Not yet. She faced him. "So you're obsessed with my love life? I think I know why."

"I'm not doing this with you," He growled. With a click his seat belt came undone. "You're off base, Roth. You're not as perceptive as you think." Damian motioned to his temple.

Raven realized faintly that she did indeed "make him". But she no longer cared about that.

No. This had become so much more.

"I'm every bit as perceptive as I think I am." Pale hands unbuckled her own seat belt and inched closer. Damian started to rise, pulling out his phone, suddenly finding it fascinating.

"Sit down, Damian." Raven forced him back down into the white leather, and his phone clattered to the ground. Damian probably could have overpowered her, but he allowed it, just like she knew he would. "You wanted to sit here, this plane is your real estate, so don't change seats on my account. I'll accommodate you."

"You're - crazy." Wide emeralds darted around madly.

"Yes, I am." She leaned on either side of his arm rests. Raven had caged him in. "You knew that already. And yet you keep inviting me out."

"What are you doing?"

"Proving my point." She gripped his hair in a fist. As his cool façade cracked. The faintest hint of pink rose up his cheeks, as he glared at the floor. Damian refused to meet her eyes, but she wanted to see it. The seconds leading up to the break, when he gave in to her. Raven pulled his hair back with a devious, self-satisfied smirk, forcing him to look up.

In what was so obviously a last ditch effort to keep his pride, he growled, "Roth, I'm warning you. If you don't get your highfalutin manicured talons off me -"

"You'll what, Wayne?" His Adam's apple dipped down again. Damian was all bark and no bite when it came to her.

They both knew that.

"Do it, Raven. By all means, test me..." Underneath, she could hear a faint plea masked by his harshness.

"I bet you'd like it if I did." And Raven knew he longed to see what she was up to.

Raven concentrated on the widening stare of deep jade, finding herself transfixed. That unique shade, so much darker and more dangerous than dollars. Damian's dollar bills... She could recall to mind a certain photo shoot. But in her mind, it was decidedly less philanthropic.

Damian Wayne. Hard and sculpted under taut, rich caramel. Supine and outstretched. Enticing with nothing but dollars sliding down his decency. Down and down they fell... Raven licked her lips, feeling famished after that huge meal. But in a way that was more carnal.

"What the hell are you staring at anyway?"

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Fifty-Eight

A/N: Just saying the story is picking up pace after this part so get ready.

Words: 3.4K

Warning(s): Explicit language, mentions of drug abuse

Tag List: @unknownoblivion  @sinningsixx  @edwardtriggerhandzz  @lemmyjelly  @haileynicoleseavey17  @cierrasixx19  @oskea93  @mgkobsessed  @vamprlestat  @sharon6713  @itsametaphorbriansblog  @miriampraez  @allie-mcginn @xpoisonousrosesx  @rebeccaphillips14  @nicholeh7  @fandomshit6000  @lilmou5ie  @tamedhearts  @divaanya  @kingbouji3 @evrsncnewyork @6ixx6ixx  @ratedrkohardychick91  @floregrohlssard  @oldschoolimagineblog  @thanks2pete  @abaldboi  @swoopygorl @justjodeye @liith-ium  @caos18blog  @ytwahsog  @shamlessobsession  @scarecrowmax  @toadspleen @random-internet-user-4471  @solohqrry  @loveofmyloif  @sparxx27  @kaitieskidmore1  @cruecifymesixx  @ijustwanttokiss70srogertaylor  @emmaelizabeth2014 @meetthesixxter  @sixxsixxsexx @sublimeprincesswasteland @arianareirg  @girlnight-terror  @mcnibberachi

@fancywasmyname1  @teller258316  @ggorehorror  @blowinmeupwithherlove  @xrosegoldwolfx  @mylifeisjustafeverdream  @redlipscrystalskies14 @str4nge-haze

LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED

I watch as Tommy and Nikki finish up their MTV interview to promote the new album, Nikki glancing at me every now and then.

"And, before we go, can you repeat those dates again for the release of the video of first single and the debut of the album?"

"Uh, the 'Girls, Girls, Girls' video--we're filming for that around the end of the month, the album's coming out between May fifth and May tenth, probably." Nikki states.

"Alright, you heard it here. May is gonna be the month of Mötley Crüe, obviously when those release details become more specific we will let you all at home know but for now just keep your eyes on May. Nikki, Tommy, it's always a great talk anytime you're in the studio with us, we appreciate you dropping by."

"No problem." Nikki says.

"Anytime, Dude." Tommy adds.

"Good luck with the album, it's gonna be at the top of the charts when it's out, I guarantee."

"Thanks, we really appreciate that." Tommy nods.

"And good luck also with shooting the video, I'm sure plenty of our audience will be looking forward to all the women, and of course we'll be looking forward to all the censoring we're gonna have to edit in." The interviewer's last line is sarcastic as he shakes their hands, and they laugh. "Nikki Sixx and Tommy Lee of Mötley Crüe, folks. Don't go anywhere." He finishes as they cut, and Nikki waves me over, sitting his coffee cup down to reach for my water bottle in my hand.

I give it to him and he nearly drinks the entire thing before handing it back to me.

"Thank you, babe." He says to me, letting out a breath as the interviewer bids them one last "goodbye" as they stand up and stretch.

We have to meet Mick, Vince and Doc at their rehearsal space so they can continue their auditions for background singers.

So far, the girls that have tried out are either gorgeous but can't sing, and the ones who can sing like Whitney Houston aren't "hot enough to be on the same stage as Mötley Crüe", even though I've seen them hook up with far worse.

I haven't said a word about 'You're All I Need' because the giant, heavy scratch my key left on the entire passenger side of Nikki's brand new car will say plenty when he finally notices it.

So far he hasn't even driven the thing since he's been back. It's just been in the garage.

"...Okay, thank you for your time." Nikki pipes to the pretty dark-haired girl with almost honey colored eyes.

I think she's on the "hot but talentless" list.

"Dude, we're never gonna find fucking singers." Tommy groans, rubbing his face.

"Viv, can you sing?" Vince whines.

"Like chalk against a chalk board." I reply blankly and he sighs.

"All this has been is just hours and hours of disappointment with a few good blowjobs in between." Vince states.

"Just shut up and be patient." Mick tells them.

Doc sends the next girl in, and I see everyone's faces light up because she's pretty.

Blonde hair, a nice figure, and she dresses the part.

"Hi." She greets us with a smile.

"Hi." Vince grins back.

"I-I'm Donna McDaniel." She says next.

"Okay, here's some lyrics." Nikki hands her a sheet of paper with the main lines of a few of their songs she'd have to sing backup for and she takes it. "Start when you're ready."

The relief on their faces when she starts, makes me want to laugh.

She's attractive and she can sing.

"When you leave, tell Doc that we're interested, and he'll lead you to where you can stay until we finish up." Nikki informs her and she nods, handing the music back to him.

"Thank you." She tells them as she steps out.

"No, thank you." Vince says out of earshot, looking a little more hopeful that they'll find their second singer.

And sure enough, they do.

Within forty more minutes, they're sending everyone else home after another blonde, named "Emi" but she pronounces it "Amy", comes in.

I can see Vince's mind churning up how to get her and Donna to fuck around with him, and Nikki can see it, too.

Once Emi is sent to wait with Donna, Nikki's going into military sergeant mode.

"If we hire them," he starts, pointing at Tommy and Vince, "nobody fucks them. Got it?"

"What? Why?" Vince looks heartbroken.

"You don't shit in your own backyard, man, that's why. They're employees, we're the bosses."

"Yeah, Vinnie, we can't have employees having us wrapped around their finger." Tommy adds with a nod.

"It's the easiest pussy there possibly will ever be, are you serious?" Vince complains.

"If it's so easy, why did they both turn you down already?" I point out and he glares at me.

"Just. Don't. Fuck. Them. Got it?" Nikki sternly asks.

I guess now is a good time to mention that Nikki fucked Donna on the "Girls" tour.

The closer we got to tour, the more adamant Nikki was about cutting his addiction.

But, despite him constantly saying "I'm done with it" and throwing away everything to get high on, I'd always find him crawling around in our yard, naked, with his shot gun...carrying on about midgets and Mexicans.

It wouldn't take the neighbors five minutes to call and let me know he was out there.

Trying to tell them a believable excuse was the hard part.

I let out a soft breath, pulling the covers tighter over me, drifting further and further into sleep as the sound of our ceiling fan and Nikki flickering his lighter from the closed closet every now and again moves through the room, and lulls me to sleep.

I don't know what time it is when I wake up to the sound of Nikki screaming, running out of our room, but I force myself to sit up as quickly as I can and go after him.

I turn on the light in the hallway just in time to see him pressing the "panic" button on our security system contact box, which alerts West Tech, our security company, and they send out one of their people to come check on the situation.

"Nikki, what the hell?!" I ask him and he turns to look at me, pissed off and paranoid.

"I'm tired of these bastards not giving us any peace."

"W-What? Who?"

"You know who!"

"Nikki, what are you talking about?!"

He had smoked his crack and convinced himself our security had bugged the house and were watching him, constantly.

Then, he had decided "no, it's the FBI that's watching me" and gained the courage to set off the alarm to our security that something wasn't right.

And then, by the time West Tech arrived, Nikki was turning on them, again.

"Nikki, let me get to the door." I tell him calmly as the knocking continues.

"Fuck off!" Nikki shouts.

"Mr. Sixx, it's Chris with West Tech--"

"--Get off of my fucking property or I'll fucking shoot you!" He screams as we stand on the other side of the door, his shotgun ready. "You motherfuckers have bugged my house and I'm not fucking taking it anymore!"

"Mr. Sixx--"

They stop trying the second Nikki cracks the door open, and points his gun at all of them.

I hear them scatter to their van, the tires screeching as they quickly make a break for it.

He slams the door shut and locks it, the both of us waiting in silence until we decide they're gone.

"You called our security...then shot at them because they answered the call..." I point out to him, exhausted, and he looks down at me. "I'm sleeping in the guest bedroom." I state.

I lock the door behind me and climb into the bed, hearing Nikki go back to our bedroom, and I envy Karen for staying over at a friend's house because Nikki is starting to really wear me down with his shit.

The next few nights consists of Nikki, Tommy, me and the director working on the music video, Wayne Isham, trying to decide what strip club would be best to film the video for "Girls, Girls, Girls" at.

And me and Nikki arguing over another matter that is too be determined:

"I said I'm not gonna be in the video." I repeat to Nikki, crossing my arms and he raises a brow.

"Babe, it's not that serious." Nikki states.

"I already told you I'm not comfortable with it."

"You wear bikinis all the time, you wear thongs and bras all the time...It's not like I'm gonna have you up there topless or anything." He motions to the stage of the Seventh Veil.

"Nikki, I'm not comfortable with it. Why can't you just let that go?"

"Why can't you be more fun?"

"Nikki, it's fine if she doesn't want to." Tommy lightly tells him with a chuckle.

Nikki doesn't even hear him, too busy focusing on me to see if he cracked me or not.

"Are you fellas good on drinks?" A scantily clad cocktail waitress asks us.

"We're fine, thanks." Wayne tells her with a decent amount of class...but that doesn't sit well with Tommy and Nikki.

"Okay, my name's Tabby if you guys need anything, let me know."

Before she can smile and walk away, Tommy's stopping her.

"Actually, there is something else, Tabby." He states, smiling, and she grins politely.

"What can I get for you?"

He motions for her to come closer and he gets in her ear, with Nikki smirking, knowing exactly what he was proposing to the pretty brunette.

Her face pales, and she glances at me before awkwardly giving Tommy nudge with her elbow as if he were joking.

His face shifts to one of seriousness.

"What, you think I'm joking?" He asks her and she tries to keep from looking too uncomfortable, giving all of us a small smile before saying:

"I've gotta get back to work. Let me know when you guys need a refill, you know it's on the house."

She walks away and Nikki and Tommy chuckle.

That was the first time I had seen a woman get uncomfortable around the guys.

Usually they were all for whatever it is Tommy or Vince suggest doing with them...I later found out Tommy had suggested to Tabby that he and Nikki meet her in the bathroom to tag team her.

That's why she had looked almost sick looking at me, when he was whispering in her ear.

She was probably thinking:

"Bless her naive heart."

Me nor Wayne bother to ask any questions about the incident before we're getting ready to go.

The guys and Wayne talk to the owner about possibly shooting the video and he's all for it, giving them the day after tomorrow to get it done.

I'm too busy thinking about what Nikki said earlier to really listen all that much.

"Why can't you be more fun?" who the hell does he think he is? Oh, right, he's "NiKkI fUcKiNg SiXx."

Once we're stepping outside and telling Wayne "bye", Nikki and Tommy are putting in to going to the Cathouse.

I just want to go home.

"I don't feel like going all the way back home, then coming all the way back." Nikki complains and I furrow my brows a little.

"Nikki, it's..." I grab his wrist to pull his jacket sleeve up and look at his watch. It's nearly 3:00am. "...2:53."

"Then just call a cab." He suggests.

"Are you on smack right now?" I don't sugarcoat the question. "You're being a bigger asshole than you are when you're sober." I add.

"Fuck off!" He snaps at me.

I can tell Tommy wants to say something, but keeps quiet.

"Fine." I say, turning on my heel to the payphone down the way.

I realize I don't have any money to pay for it, but before I can go back and ask Nikki for some change, he and Tommy are off.

So I find my next option.

I walk nearly an hour to the Franklin and get to where Duff's staying, only to find him, and none of the guys are home.

I feel like crying, but decide this isn't the end of the world before I calm down and sit by his door like a lost puppy.

I wake up to the feeling of someone nudging me awake with their shoe, and I'm met with Izzy looking down at me.

"Izzy." I greet him.

"Viv." He replies blankly. "Did you leave or were you thrown out?" He asks me and I roll my eyes before he gives me the slightest hint of a smile before it fades and he's nodding across the hall. "C'mon."

I stand up as he unlocks his apartment and motions me inside.

"You can stay here until Duff gets in." He says.

"Thank you." I reply, sitting on the couch as he hands me a shitty blanket.

"I'm gonna go scrub the lipstick and regret from my balls." He informs me, heading to the bathroom.

"At least you regret it." I say back.

"Nah, I don't regret getting a blowjob from a random girl, I regret not nailing her." He corrects me and I don't even hide my laughter.

Once he's done, he's stepping across the hall to see if Duff's back. Apparently he is because Izzy's coming to get me.

"Fuck off, Sixxette." He takes the blanket from me and I gladly head towards Duff's place.

When I get inside, Duff's passed out on the couch, snoring, and smelling like a bar.

I walk over to him, gently shaking him awake, and he let's out another groan.

"Go away." He waves his hand, his eyes closed, and I raise a brow.

"Duff, it's Viv. C'mon, at least go get in your bed so you won't feel worse tomorrow."

He perks up at the sound of my voice, lifting his head, rubbing his eyes.

"I've...is this a dream? 'Cause usually you're naked and 'Purple Rain' is playing." He slurs and I feel my face heat up in embarrassment.

"No, it isn't a dream...and I didn't need to know that but thank you, I guess." I reply, pulling his boots off.

I help him stand, his tall, lanky figure towering over me.

"You look pretty, were you on a date?" He asks when I get him to sit on his bed, helping him not fall over as he tries to take off his shirt and gets caught in it.

"Er...kinda?" I shrug and he nods. "Were you on a date?" I ask when a condom wrapper falls from his jacket and he scrunches his face up.

"Er...kinda." He replies in the same tone, rubbing his face and I laugh. "Hey, I'm a bachelor now, Viv. I'm gullible. I mean elgib--no, estrang...or amb...what the fuck is that word?"

"Eligible?"

"Yeah, that one." He coughs, taking his belt off as I pick up his scattered dirty clothes and put them against his wall in a pile.

When I turn back around, I get a split-second's worth of an eyeful of him completely naked and snap back around, covering my eyes.

"Ohh...I should've told you I'm freeballing." He says.

"Just..." I turn around, keeping my eyes closed, holding my hand out for his pants so I can put them in the pile with his other clothes.

"Are you reaching for it or something?" He laughs and, again, my face is bright red.

"No, Duff, I'm not reaching for it. I need your pants." I inform him.

He laughs some more, throwing the pants my way and I take them and put them in the pile as he crawls into bed and under the covers.

"By the way, it's bigger than that." He informs me and I furrow my brows and look at him.

"What?"

"It's cold in here so..."

I realize he's referring to his dick and I scream internally.

"...Okay, Duff, too much informa--"

"--I'm packing. That's all I'm saying. I'm like a can of Spam. Lotta meat in--"

"--Shh!" I blush even more, squeezing my eyes shut.

"Oh, oops."

"Jeez. Goodnight, Duff." I'm about to go sleep on the couch.

"Where ya going?" He asks me when I turn the light off.

"Sleeping on the couch."

"You can sleep in here, I can take the couch." He sits up.

"No, no. You're not gonna feel good tomorrow just sleep in here, really, it's fine."

"Well, are you gonna be okay? You don't sleeping by yourself."

I sigh, wishing it were that simple.

"Duff, we can't do that. Nikki wrote an entire song about wanting to kill me, and it was because he thinks something's happening between you and I." I explain.

"Nikki accusing you of cheating?" There's an uncomfortable wait before he says, "that's fucking rich."

"Yeah, well, he doesn't like it so out of respect for him--"

"--I don't fucking respect him." He mumbles.

"Duff, you're drunk. Just sleep it off."

"You're right. I should shut the fuck up let the universe deal him his fucking cards."

I ignore him saying so, turning to leave, but I stop myself.

I'm only here to begin with because Nikki couldn't just take me back home.

I step back to the bed, taking my heels and jacket off.

I take the extra pillow under mine and put it between us as I get into bed.

"Goodnight, Duff." I say quietly, turning my back to him.

"G'night, Viv."

Nikki would have had an absolute fit had he known, then again, I wasn't fucking Duff, I had no intention of doing so, and I told Nikki exactly where I ended up staying the next day.

The sun glitters through the window of Duff's room, hitting my face, and I blink my eyes open, feeling Duff breathing in and out.

Sometime during the night I must've broken past the pillow partition because, although I'm facing away from him, my back is pulled to his side, the side of my face is resting against his bicep, my shoulder tucked under the pit of his arm, and the arm that my face is against, is wrapped around me, his hand resting against my stomach.

I turn to look at him, seeing his peaceful expression as he sleeps contently.

My mind drifts back to that dream I once had about him.

I hate that Nikki thinks anything is going on between Duff and I, but it's my fault.

I lied about seeing him, I lied by omittion at the beginning by not even telling Nikki about him...a part of me wants to think if I were to tell Nikki about me dreaming I had sex with Duff, it'd be a wake up call that our issues are more serious than he believed.

I mean, when you're in a committed relationship and you can picture yourself having sex with someone you're close to, to the point your subconscious creates this entire fantasized scenario, there's something wrong that needs to be talked about.

But another part of me knows he'll flip his shit, call me a "whore" and probably file for divorce.

So, keeping it to myself it is.

My eyes go to my crucifix lying on the bedside table, and I reach out for it.

I taken it off last night when I felt too guilty for sweeping in the same bed as Duff, knowing Nikki wouldn't like it.

I thought if I took it off, I wouldn't feel bad anymore.

And I didn't.

When I was a teenager I would take that necklace off anytime I did something I thought my mother would disapprove of. Whether it was cheating on homework assignments, or, eventually, fucking Nikki Sixx.

I ended up picking that habit back up once Duff and I started getting closer, except instead of avoiding the disapproval of my mother, I was fleeing the disapproval of Nikki.

One thing I didn't take in to consideration, however, taking it off left me at risk for leaving a track.

Just like Mick had put together I had slept with Nikki because my crucifix was on his bedroom floor back in '81, halfway through the "Girls" tour with Guns N' Roses, I accidentally left my track on the bathroom counter in Duff's room, where Nikki went to throw up while he was hanging out with him, Slash, and Steven.

What they should teach in children's church: if you're going to sin, keep any religious jewelry or articles of clothing on.

Whomever the hell you worship already knows you're up to no good.

[boredliondisorder]

Let's say you knew all about BPD before going to therapy, and you were diagnosed already. Would you still have gone to therapy, do you believe it was worth it for you? I don't know if it's worth going for me, I know I'll never be able to get that attachment, love and trust that I need anyways, might as well just pretend to be an NT until I can die. It's a life full of pain for sure but we'll have that anyways, won't we? Why therapy? Was hoping you could share the benefits you got from it.

---

Oh this might be a long one. OK.

I was actually diagnosed over ten years ago in 2008, iirc. At that point, I was in the hospital and was told that I either had to see a therapist of the doctor’s choosing, or I’d stay in the hospital for an indeterminate length of time. Staying in the hospital would cause me to lose my job, etc, So I agreed to see a therapist.

It took them quite a while to find someone who would treat a person with a diagnosis of BPD. Back then, BPD was seen as incurable and dangerous. No one wanted to risk their career or their life treating someone with BPD. Even though it turned out that people with BPD (those who legitimately suffered from it and weren’t just abusive) are not dangerous, and their outbursts are based around fear. Many thanks to Dr. Linehan for her work in that area.

Anyway, to make that long story short, the therapist tried to convince me I didn’t have BPD. It was a nightmare all around, and I left as soon as I could.

So I lived with that diagnosis for eleven years, not truly understanding it, warning people about it, both attaching myself to people and HATING that attachment to people, going through minor ups and downs, until a medical problem caused the anti-psychotics I was on to stop working.

Then I actually had to face the diagnosis. It started to get bad. But it was such a slow process that I didn’t realize it. Eventually, I hurt the people who mattered to me most, which is what BPD tends to lead to over and over and over, and I realized that if it happened again, I wouldn’t be able to take it. I’d rather kill myself than live through that again. I had to break the cycle.

I really did want to live. I wanted to live to finish my book, to see my nephews grow up, to achieve my dream of getting venomous snake certification and working with my favorite elapid, the king cobra. I couldn’t do all that if I was dead.

At the time I decided to go back to therapy, I knew SO MUCH about BPD. I was sure it would be useless for me for the same reasons you do: that I was doomed to repeat this pattern for the rest of my (possibly short) life, working at trust for weeks and months, then losing it because of a disease that refuses to disappear. A lot of this is in my previous posts, so I won’t go into it all in detail again, but my mind finally got to a point where it refused to accept friendship. I didn’t talk to anyone except my parents, my sister, and my best friend for weeks.

I found a therapist who specialized in BPD. And that’s important, because she helped me discover where my BPD came from--where it started and the reasons for it--as well as learning to question the fears that often led to the stereotypical “borderline rage.” She taught me how to take a step back and re-evaluate. To leave a situation alone for a while until I had a legitimate answer. To actually have discussions with people instead of accusing.

I’ve already been able to use these new skills when it comes to very slowly forming bonds with people. That’s another thing I learned--how to not go from 0 to 60 in a new friendship, but develop it slowly. To not saddle new friends with my problems, but to get to know them first. And sometimes it turns out--as I’ve found a couple times already--that those friends aren’t right for hearing my issues, and I would have hurt myself by rushing into an unsustainable friendship.

And this took... so much time. I am still learning. And I think I always will have to continue learning, because BPD isn’t curable. The things most people know when it comes to emotion and relationships aren’t things that come to us naturally. You can recover from BPD, but the skills you learn are hard-fought and difficult to master. In a lot of ways, a person with BPD who has recovered is always going to have to “fake it” in the simplest of terms.

But that’s okay. To paraphrase the saying, if you can’t naturally form healthy emotional attachments, therapy-learned is okay, too.

In your ask, you said “might as well just pretend to be an NT until I can die.” And honestly, that’s... The whole point of therapy. Therapy’s going to help you pretend, and over time, pretending will become easier. Almost natural. And there will be days when you want to backtrack. When you want to say “why don’t you love me?” to your very best friends. But you’ll have the tools to Not Do That, which is more than you might have now.

It’s unfortunate that NTs refuse to truly accommodate those with BPD, but they really can’t understand it because they don’t grasp the intensity of the emotions we suffer. They don’t understand why we’re asking them to help us in a certain way, or fuck, to just pick up a book and read about the disorder. NTs on tumblr have also been told over and over that they’re justified for “leaving abusive people, even if they’re mentally ill,” and that’s where the mindset remains. So many people equate the symptoms of BPD with actual abuse, so much so that when you tell a neurotypical person that you have BPD, the response I’ve always gotten without fail is “but you don’t seem like that type of person.”

I’m working to change that. I don’t think I could do that without therapy. It’s an uphill battle, but I think I’ve gotten through to some people already. I’m going to continue to try.

In summary, it’s okay to use therapy as a way to learn how to pretend. And in pretending, you’ll learn to feel better, because you won’t be destroying your friendships at every turn. When the low part of your cycle starts its upswing, you’ll still have friends there to help you. Try not to resent them too much for their ignorance.

There is light at the end of the tunnel, even if it’s a lot of work. But I guarantee that if you find a therapist you like who specializes in BPD, you’ll eventually start to see improvement. Seriously. I think we’re all naturally suspicious and we’re so sure that therapy can’t help us, but it really can. I’ve been right where you are, and I’m glad I decided to go.