#no evidence of endgame's mistakes here
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For Me {Loki x GN!Reader}
Summary: A soul for a soul… Except neither of you are willing to let the other go. (Avengers ‘Endgame’ AU)
A/N: I apologise in advance.
Warnings: Death
“What you seek lies in front of you… In order to take the stone, you must lose that which you love… An everlasting exchange. A soul… for a soul.”
“Bit of a mood killer, isn’t he?”
Your gaze stayed fixed on the cliff’s edge from a safe distance away, your eyes flickering towards Red Skull - the keeper of the soul stone. Loki stood beside you, his gaze also fixed ahead. His mind was racing, processing the words that had been spoken to them.
A soul for a soul.
His hands clenched at his sides, jaw tensing as he let out a heavy breath. Your tone was wry, trying to hide your own turmoil over what you’d been told.
“I believe him.” Loki said lowly, voice unwavering despite how he felt within. It was a cruel twist of fate. A cruel jest. The time Loki was on the correct side… Wanting to make amends, get his redemption… Make up for the mistakes he’d made in his life… All of it. And now…
“Thanos did come here with a daughter and left with a stone… and one less daughter…” You breathed out, licking your lips anxiously. “Pretty big coincidence as they go.” You murmur, slowly turning to face Loki, finally looking up at him. Loki followed suit, turning to look at you, blue eyes meeting yours.
“Maybe… Maybe he’s lying.” Loki shrugged, shaking his head, trying to come up with any excuse, any skepticism even if the evidence was stacked against them. The wind blew through the two stone towers either side of you, the cold biting your skin. You raised a brow that said ‘we both know he isn’t’. “Alright, maybe he’s telling the truth.” Loki conceded with a small nod, voice a low rumble in his chest.
“Whatever it takes.” You searched his eyes. “That’s what we said. What we all agreed on.” You stared at each other in silence, Loki feeling his heartbeat quicken, pressure mounting every passing second. You didn’t have time. This was it. The chance to save all those people, undo what Thanos had done.
“We did.” Loki raised his chin faintly, taking a deep breath.
“Well, no point in dragging this out.” You cleared your throat, turning away from him as you faced towards the deadly drop once again. Loki took a moment, before your words registered. His brows furrowed, eyes fixed on your profile. Narrowing his eyes as he studied you, he could see resolve in your features, and it became clear… Taking a slow, measured step forwards, he angled himself in front of you.
“You aren’t seriously suggesting…” He trailed off, frown etched onto his face.
“I failed, Loki.” You spoke low, measured. “I was one of Earth’s protectors and I failed. This is our chance… To bring those people back, to fix it.” Your voice held conviction, determination… Despite the faint tremble Loki detected. He felt his chest tighten at the notion of you sacrificing yourself. He couldn’t allow it. He would not allow it.
“And you think I’d just-“ He raised a brow, a hand raising in a small shrugging gesture. “-let you waltz off the edge to your death?” You let out a frustrated sigh.
“Do you have any better ideas?” You finally looked at him again.
“No-“
“Well then.” A pause. “It’s settled.” You went to take a step forwards, Loki swiftly blocking your path, hands up in a gesture to keep you in your place.
“No, it is not.” Loki said sternly. “You must think I’m a fool if you think for one second that I would allow you to make this decision.” His brows creased, eyes narrowing, jaw still tense.
“This is bigger than us, this is my choice-“ You argued, your own eyes narrowing in the process.
“And what about my choice?”
Loki’s question hung between you both, a chill going through you that wasn’t from the biting cold or Vormir. His blue eyes searched your face, before his hands slowly moved to gently grip your biceps, keeping you still.
“You mention failure… You forget, we have both made mistakes. Failed.” He continued, voice beginning to tremble faintly. “Failed others, ourselves… But I assure you, my list of failures far exceeds yours.”
“That isn’t the point-“ You closed your eyes, frustration creeping into your tone.
“Isn’t it?” He shook his head. “If either of us is to do this, it should be me.”
You reopened your eyes, furrowing your brows. The resolve was now apparent in Loki’s features, mirroring your own. You knew of his past, his mistakes, his anger… His pain. And the thought of him throwing himself from the cliff’s edge, thinking it was his redemption… It was unthinkable.
“Thor needs you.” The words came from your lips in a whisper.
“And I need you!” Loki exclaimed, grip tightening on your arms slightly, as if to will you to believe him, to understand, to see… His words made your breath hitch. “I… need you.” He repeated, quieter, the sharp lines of his face softening. Tears began to form in your eyes, turning them glassy as the space hues of the sky reflected in them. “You showed me… a better way.” He blinked, taking a small step closer, wanting to close the gap between you. “You saw something in me… That I hadn’t seen in myself.”
You had been his guide, his light in the darkness of the last five years. From his close death with Thanos, to here and now. His choice to stay on Earth, his choice to protect what was left… That was because of you. To protect you. You had been hope when it was hard.
“Loki…” Your lip quivered. “I can’t let you do this.”
The stone wanted a soul, a loss of that which they loved… Either of them sacrificing themselves would give them what they wanted, because even though it was unspoken, silent and tangible between you both… You both loved each other. Wholly. Completely.
“And I can’t let you go.” He replied, barely above a whisper.
An impasse.
Neither of you were willing to let the other walk off the edge…
“I’m sorry.” The words left you before even you could register them, hand rising, the familiar glow of your magic at your finger tips as you sent a blast towards him, the close proximity causing him to fly back. He landed on the harsh ground with a grunt, fists clenched as he felt fear and anger grip at his heart. His head whipped up, seeing you taking determined steps towards the edge.
“No.” He muttered to himself in a low growl, pushing himself to his knees as he desperately reached out his arm, using his telekinesis to wrap around you, pulling your form back, your boots dragging on the stone.
You let out a sound of irritation, hearing him get to his feet as his hold of you dropped, his long legs rushing towards you to try and get between you and your location.
“Stop!” Loki shouted, voice reverberating off the stone around you. It was a bellow, a plea and command. You once again called upon your magic, raising your hand, ready to fire another blast his way. This was for him. For all of them. However, Loki met your blast with his own, green meeting violet as your magics collided. You both were sent tumbling backwards, your form landing on its side as your hand gripping the cold stone. You felt pain go through you from the impact, looking up to see Loki, already scrambling to his feet.
Gritting your teeth, you do the same, seeing him now moving towards the edge with long strides. Of course, he felt fear. He didn’t want to die. But his love for you, his willingness to protect you overrode that inherent fear. You ran, skidding to a stop in front of him as you grasped his wrists, both of you stuck in a push and pull situation.
“Stop- Let me do this- My redemption-“ Loki said through his teeth, the strain evident on his features as you both tried to hold the other back.
“This is not your redemption!” You exclaimed, emotion in your voice. “Getting the stone, getting back to the others and saving those people, that’s your redemption!” You spoke with conviction, honesty, you believed every word you said. This was not his end. He wanted redemption, he would get it. But not this way. “Saving the universe, not me!”
“No-“ Loki’s voice cracked, his own eyes turning watery as he stared at you. He wondered if you could hear his heart beating, it was loud, wild, desperate. “I don’t want a universe without you in it!” His words were raw, full of emotion. Loki was known for being composed, a strategic thinker, a chaos bringer - but in this moment, he was simply a man, desperate to save the one he loved.
Your face crumpled slightly at his words, a tear finally escaping with a ragged breath. You pushed yourself, shoving him away from you in the process, making him stumble, before you sent another blast of magic at his chest, sending him crashing against the stone tower. Loki let out a pained sound as he fell to the floor, to his hands and knees. You were both strong-willed, defiant, insistent… And when an emotion such as love was involved… It was inevitable that it would not be easy.
“I’m sorry.” You repeated your earlier words, feeling a tear roll down your cheek. Loki looked up, his expression one of despair. It hurt, making your chest ache. Lifting your hand, you used your magic to hold him in place, keeping him on the ground as he struggled against it.
You spun on your heel, turning to the edge again, this time sprinting towards it. It was like time moved in slow motion, and Loki’s fear was palpable in the air. You missed the broken look that flashed on his face, the skin under his eyes now damp from his own tears. He felt helpless.
Just as you reached the edge, throwing yourself over, you heard the familiar shimmer of Loki’s magic, head whipping up as you felt a hand grasp your arm, stopping your fall. Loki’s face contorted, straining to keep himself from falling over the edge with you as you dangled. The drop was an instant kill, there was no surviving its height. He let out a ragged breath, chest panting as the muscles in his arm tensed, hand around your wrist holding tight.
You let out a breath of your own, looking up at him as you searched his eyes. The wind howled faintly around you, and you didn’t dare look down, knowing if you did - you may plead for him to pull you up.
“I won’t let go.” Loki spoke lowly, voice trembling. His tears fell freely now, unable to keep them back.
“You have to.” You shook your head faintly, eyes pleading for him to understand.
“I refuse.”
Silence.
“Let me go.” There was a certain look of acceptance on your face, one that was unsettling to Loki. How could you be okay with this? How could you ask him of such a thing?
“No.” He moved his other hand, trying to reach for your arm, but it was out of reach. If he leaned any further forwards, you would both fall to your deaths. For nothing. He let out a yell of frustration, gritting his teeth as he could feel the fabric of your clothes slipping slowly in his grasp.
“Loki-“ You drew his attention back to your face, voice soft. “It’s okay.” You nodded faintly. “Here… This isn’t your redemption.” You reiterated, brows furrowing. Loki swallowed the lump in his throat, brows furrowed in sadness. “You’re so much more than this.”
Loki let out a stuttered breath, face crumpling at your words as he shook his head defiantly. “Don’t- Don’t do this.” He begged. “There is no universe without you in it.” His words were spoken with such intense emotion, heart constricting tighter and tighter with each passing second. You wished there had been more time, you wished you had told him what he meant to you, you wished there was another way…
“Yes there is.” You whispered, a tear slipping down your cheek. “Fight for it.” You held his gaze, willing him to do as you said. “Take the stone, and get them back.” A pause. “For me.”
Loki had known pains in his life, many in fact, but this… This was unlike anything he had ever known. His heart, finally found belonging, a chance to not be alone… And it was being ripped away from him… For the greater good. It was enough to reignite his anger from years ago, to make him want to tear down every single thing in the universe until it was just him and you. Nothing that could harm you, nothing that could pull you apart… But he knew… That wasn’t who he was anymore.
Because of you.
“Please.” Loki’s voice shook, lip quivering. You gave him the faintest of smile, rueful, remorseful. A silent apology, and a promise of a better future for him. A symbol of love… And knowing when to let it go… For the greater good. Damn you for being an Avenger, for being selfless. Or maybe selfish. He didn’t know anymore.
And with that, your boot found the rocky stone of the cliff, pushing, using it to create momentum, to loosen his grip further from your wrist. Loki’s heart seized, lips parting in shock and hurt, trying his best to keep his hold. But when you pushed yourself again… It was enough.
Your arm slipped from his grip, his hand closing around the air as the air left his lungs. His eyes widened, gasping as he watched your body begin to fall.
Down, down, down.
“No!” He roared, body shaking from the intensity of his yell. It echoed around him, the wind carrying it away. Anguish, it was utter anguish. He couldn’t begin to despite the hole he felt beginning to form in his chest, a void that widened with every second you fell further. He felt frozen, like he couldn’t move, couldn’t think. Stuck in place.
And when your body finally hit the cold, harsh ground god knows how many feet below… He felt his body crumple, muscles completely going limp, as he could do nothing. Nothing but stare. His eyes closed, a sob wracking through his body. His fists clenched, hitting the rock beneath him at the cliff’s edge as he screamed. He felt sick. He had to do everything in his power not to throw himself after you. Your voice, your words… They were the only thing keeping him from doing so.
‘Take the stone and get them back. For me.’
#loki x reader#loki laufeyson x reader#loki#loki laufeyson#loki imagine#loki fanfic#loki marvel#marvel x reader#mcu x reader#loki of asgard#loki odinson
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I love how I said I was too tired and now here I’m back with another ask lol 
Ugh the Super Spy handhold scene is just PEAK insight into why Will fell in love with Mike. Why Will didn’t list Mike as one of the people he felt babied or treated like glass by. Like he’s not a mistake.
Mike listens to Will and then turns the now-memories into an ability Will now has, something that could help them defeat the Mind Flayer. He doesn’t baby him, he doesn’t treat him like he’s broken or infected or sickly, he encourages him and supports him, and he’s so soft and sweet and encouraging, but the second Will voices fear of the Mind Flayer figuring out that they’re spying, and spying back, Mike becomes so firm and determined and protective in a way that isn’t babying Will but rather throwing up his shield and standing by his side to go through this together.
The Duffers have clearly put so much thought and consideration into why Will loves Mike. They didn’t make it like Dustin and Max—Dustin had a surface level crush on Max, a girl he’d known for a week (and then a month, by the Snow Ball) that he moved on from by season 3. If you’d have asked season 2 Dustin why he liked Max, he’d probably sound a lot like Mike talking about El: she’s so cool, she’s badass, she’s talented at X Y Z. Nothing about how she makes him feel.
The reasons Will gives in the van scene for how Mike makes him feel are illustrated beautifully in season 2. And it sucks that season 3 rocked that—“It’s not my fault you don’t like girls!” but one summer wasn’t enough to destroy was has been building since they were in kindergarten.
Which, on that note, I think is another major piece of evidence as to Byler being endgame in season 5: the fact that they’re filming a childhood Byler + Jonathan flashback scene. I think it can be all too easy to forget that these characters lives are not confined to just the seasons that we have watched them go through. It’s one thing for the characters to talk about meeting in kindergarten, it’s another thing for us to see a scene of them that young and realize, “oh my gosh they really do have so much history and emotional buildup.” Especially if the flashback buyer scene that we do get is one with a lot of emotional weight or baggage (maybe Lonnie and something he did or said will be mentioned) or they make a promise together or one of those classic, “when I grow up, I’m gonna marry you!” scenes (if so, make Mike say it pleeeaaasseee).
They’re giving us a flashback Byler scene because they want us to understand and feel just how long these two have loved each other, even before it was romantic, even before they understood it was romantic. Because they want us/ the GA to see how much it makes sense. How this has been a long time coming.
Okay sleep time lol
Hello, you probably already slept, woke up and slept again lmao
No but in all seriousness, that's exactly what I think too. I believe it can be easy for people to think why would Will fall for Mike? Like, I see people saying that Will deserves better and blablabla.
But! Even with that awful thing Mike has said, he has shown more care for Will than he has for pretty much anyone else.
Mike listens to Will, doesn't coddle him or make him feel like he is wrong, ensures that Will knows he's there for him, supports him and listens to him but not only that, he shows to Will that he can do things himself and that he's not broken or wrong.
It shows how much Mike means to Will that not even those words were enough to stop him from caring about Mike, because the thing is, like you said, we don't even know the extent of what Mike means to him and vice versa.
Using the flashbacks is a sure fire way of letting the audience know that their connection was blossoming for ages, is a way of allowing us to see how much Mike has always cared for Will, even when he couldn't show it properly.
And also I hope you managed to get some rest ❤️
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During his emotionally charged speech in the van, Will says one particularly potent line.
"When you're different... You feel like... a mistake."
This line is highlighted visually by the camera shifting positions to outside of the van, a shot that is only used one other time to punctuate the end of the scene. This line holds extra weight and the show wants you to know it.
I already made an analysis on the word mistake and what that means for Will, but I want to look at the word different, which feels emphasized in the delivery of the line as well.
"When you're [pause for effect] different..."
It's popular headcanon among st fandom that "everyone in Hawkins is gay!" which sometimes bleeds from into their belief of real canon. Sexuality headcanon lists suddenly are seen with an air of truth to them, and a number of fanon queer ships are accompanied with evidence of their supposed endgame status.
I realize that this is kind of a... weird post to make. I'm not really making this to tell people to stop doing something, this is more of just a rattling off of some opinions I've had for awhile.
I do wanna start off with the obligatory: Do whatever the hell you want. I'm not here to stop you from doing something or tell you that you are wrong for thinking that a character is gay or for shipping something. You are allowed to ship whoever you want, think whatever you want about any character, any ship I don't like I have filtered. But I'm also allowed to not like these ships, or disagree with how others view certain characters. Just as others are allowed to have and express their opinion, I'm also allowed to have and state my opinions on the opinion website.
I think the important thing regarding Will being different is the fact that he is different. As my good friend @karenchildress once put it, if everyone were queer, it would cheapen the message the show is trying to give. Sure, the show displays a variety of ways of being different, but being gay is, among other things Will has been through re: being taken into the Upside Down, is Will's way of being different in Hawkins.
And of course Robin is gay as well, and while there is some crossover, the lived experiences of a gay man is different from that of a lesbian woman, which the show does touch on. Will's story is part of an extended AIDS metaphor, and Robin struggles to gain the attention of women in a world that seems to revolve around the attention of men.
It might be nice to have a moment between Will and Robin, although that alone won't solve Will's problem, i.e. his belief that being different makes him a mistake. Cause that's the thing: the resolution is that being different is a good thing.
If everyone character were queer, this would cheapen the message. Suddenly the resolution isn't that being different is a good thing, but that he isn't different after all.
So then, are queer stories meant to have only token characters?
I think it depends on the type of story, and what it's trying to say. Heartstopper has an eclectic queer cast, but it's also a show that embraces finding community and other people like you. Sex Education has a variety of different sexual identities, but it's also a show that aims to explore a lot of different perspectives.
And there are also queer stories where the queer character's disposition, and their struggle because of that, is a big part of the story. I believe this is what this show is trying to do— highlight Will's difference and how that pertains to his personal struggle and the resolution of that.
One argument that I hear against Will with powers is the idea that making him more different would be bad for his character, because he hates being different. But the thing is, Will is going to learn that his differences are a good thing, which may include any possible powers.
Of course Will isn't the only one with powers, and he also isn't the only gay one. El, Henry, and Kali all have powers, and Robin, Vickie, and Mike (and maybe Henry? I haven't seen TFS myself so I'm not commenting on that) are all gay. So while he's not alone, these things are still a rarity. It's not a case of a headcanon list with mostly everyone gay and some token straights.
"Characters are not straight by default."
This sentiment isn't unique to the st fandom and also didn't originate within this fandom, but it is something that I hear often. And it's... not really true, although it kind of depends on the piece of media we are talking about. It might be easy to say this about a show made in the 2020's, although this same sentiment is hard to state about, well, most shows made before the 2020s. And even then, it depends on what the show is going for.
People being not straight by default is a true statement in real life. You shouldn't assume a sexuality for anyone, gay, straight or what have you. But characters are made by people, and people have different biases on how these characters should be written. Calling the Duffers "two straight men" would go against what I just said, although I don't think that the show was written with everyone being gay in mind. Aside from the 4 (maybe 5) I listed, the other characters are not written to be queer. They just aren't.
All of the queer characters have arcs that feature their queerness. Will's queerness has been mentioned since season one. Robin's romance becomes part of her plot in season 4, and Vickie is introduced as her love interest. Romance has always been an important facet of Mike's story since season one, and his failure in a straight romance is highlighted in seasons three and four. Chekhov's painting of season 4 seems to solidify a gay Mike.
Elmax and Ronance as endgame options not only have no lead up but are also mean spirited towards Lucas and Vickie. Elmax gets together, breaking up Lumax, which has been built up since season two, and Lucas is supposed to be okay with this because????? Ronance get's together, effectively writing off a queer character that the show had introduced, and she can't even fulfill the reason she exists in the first place? Rockie is not the most well developed relationship out there, but it's the one that the show has decided to go for. Maybe Ronance could work, in an alternate universe where the show actually wrote that in.
For those that argue that both Max and Nancy are queer I simply... disagree. And you can disagree with me too, we'll both just agree to disagree. I'm not against headcanons, which are usually harmless, but also usually driven by the desires of the headcanon-er and less so the canon of the show. Which again, is fine, but it's also these headcanons which are being used to drive an argument for actual show canon. Usually the argument for any character being queer that wasn't already listed in canon rests solely on vibes, not any concrete evidence that may suggest actual attraction to the same sex.
More substantial evidence usually comes when someone applies a queer lens to a certain character, but an interpretation can be different from authorial intent. And sometimes, the viewer may be so focused on the metaphorical, that they fail to see the literal.
I do think that you could easily apply a queer lens to El's story. Her story is about, in her words, "not belonging," in society, having to remain in hiding, and deviating from feminine norms. I can easily see how you can derive a queer message from this, but all of the traits listed above are a result of her having powers and being raised in a lab, not being attracted to the same sex. Metaphor alone cannot prove that she likes girls.
Going back to Nancy, Nancy's romantic options are between Jonathan and Steve, although the show seems to make it clear that it's going with Jonathan in the end, what with Jancy holding hands at the end of season 4. Steve get's brought up in conversation between the two, alluding two some unresolved tension that's likely to be brought up in season 5, and Robin is... at the high school with Vickie. That is the end of the season establishing the arcs and romances for the final season.
"Gay people didn't exist in the 80's."
That's an argument on the opposite end of things that just isn't true, although I've also heard the counter for this argument, that gay people did in fact exist in the 80's, as evidence that everyone is gay. I'm not really here to argue whether or not gay people existed in the 80's (they did) I'm just here to argue what I think the canon of the show is presenting.
That being said, the show taking place in the 80's is still significant. It may not be a hyperrealistic depiction of the 80's, but the show does seem to understand the idea that at that time, it was very difficult for gay people come out and to start relationships. It's the reason that Robin can't just go up to Vickie and ask her out, and it's the reason that Will can't just say that the painting is from him. It's the reason why Mike hasn't quite yet left his relationship with El and accepted himself. It's the reason why Rockie has to discreetly flirt through peanut butter sandwiches. A character who hasn't had queerness built into their plot, or a relationship that has no buildup, isn't suddenly going to become canon in the last season.
I was talking about this once with a friend who used the show Only Murders in the Building as an example. In the shows second season, Selena Gomez's character is revealed to be bisexual and dates a character that Cara Delevingne plays for most of the season. The show doesn't build up to her character being bisexual, she doesn't come out as such, the other characters don't make a big deal out of it, she just is. So why can this show do something like that but Stranger Things can't?
Well, Only Murders is a show that takes place in present day, and is a light-hearted comedy (albeit with murder). A character suddenly being bisexual with no set up makes sense for the tone that the show has established and when it takes place. Stranger Things takes place in the 80's and establishes within it's first season and maintains it throughout that gay people get killed and are seen as social pariahs.
It's not that I don't understand where the desire to have more characters be queer comes from, especially characters that people already like and relate to. I don't think it's harmful to think that these characters are queer, I'm making an argument purely with regard to authorial intent and the actual outcome of the show. Again, feel free to disagree with me and continue to do whatever you want, these are just some thoughts that I have had on my mind for a while and wanted to put out.
#well this has been sitting in the drafts for a while#sorry to focus on the female characters#i would write something about steve but i also just. dont even tough that side with a ten foot poll#anyways#dont feel obligated to read all of this this is a post for me than anyone else#stranger things#conclusion is a little flimsy didnt really know what else to add or how to wrap it up tbh
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SJM doesn't write her men as fuckbois, end of argument. This is romantasy, this is not real life situationships.
She writes her men as prideful beings, unwilling to kneel for anyone but their woman.
She writes her men as desperate for their female counterparts, willing to wait centuries to even earn a second glance.
So this concept of "Oh, Azriel & Elain don't actually want each other, they're just trying to blow off steam." Is ridiculous.
Regardless of their past, their background, the second they meet their love interest they fall in line and are head over heels for that ONE woman. It's not finicky love. It didn't just pass over the course of 2 pages.
SJM empowers the women more and gives them previous love interests. Feyre had Tamlin & Isaac Hale. Nesta had half of the seedy bar crowd in Velaris (no shade, go off city girl) & Tomas Mandray. Elain had Graysen.
You know what their past flings didn't get?
A POV.
We never got a POV from Tamlin, despite him being a main character and love interest in ACOTAR. We didn't get a POV from Tomas or random dude in Nesta's apartment. We didn't get a POV from Graysen.
You know which MMCs did get a POV?
Rhysand.
Cassian.
Azriel.
That in itself should be enough evidence that whatever happening between Elriel isn't just a fling, as the antis try to make it out to be.
Rhysand got a POV when he was endgame with Feyre. Cassian got a POV before he was endgame with Nesta. Now Azriel gets a POV, and there's only one sister left....
Why would SJM give Azriel a whole POV otherwise? Why not just tell it from Elain's POV?
And no it's not because that would reveal how much she apparently secretly loves Lucien while she's ready to drop her panties for Shadow Boy
That bonus chapter in ACOSF was not just SJM being in a silly goofy mood and deciding to write fuckboy Az as a new part of the story.
Also - all these people clamoring "wELL hAvE yOu rEaD tHe aZrIeL bOnUs cHaPtER?" They're just trynna use each other - Have YOU read the bonus chapter?
What part of that longing and tension and pining gave you lust and incel behavior? This man feels so undeserving of her, he thinks even touching her is to taint her goodness.
That shit poetic af.
He's out here being Azriel Allen Poe, describing her hair like dawn and begging on his knees to taste her and y'all are out here thinking "nah, they're just a fling."
Do you spout poetry and are tortured every waking moment with the love you hold for your situationship? If so - I don't think they're a situationship anymore bestie.
And Elain also wanted his hands on her. The antis trying to spin "oh she was indifferent to it, she could have been fine with or without him" is so ridiculous because literally she says yes. OFFER AND PERMISSION. She is aroused when he touches her NECK. Like come on, how down bad do you have to be for someone to get turned on when they touch your NECK. And, on top of that, she feels hurt when Azriel says this is a mistake.
Would someone only trynna get laid feel hurt over that? Would they avoid the other person after if they just wanted to blow off steam? No. She wanted Azriel just as badly. And anyone who tries to say otherwise, is just flat out not reading the words on the page.
When will Eluciens & Gwynriels quit trying to cheapen what is canon in order to make their ships work? SJM doesn't write fuckboi men. That's not up for debate.
And the fact that they'd rather have Az be using Elain (or I vice versa) for sex than actually hold feelings for her says a lot.
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your blog is my silver lining in these dark times. ive been reading too many opinions on ofts' 11ep and im going insane at this point. do you think it's still possible for a sandray happy ending? boeing is throwing me off like maddddddddddd tfff
Okay, I finally got to watch the whole episode with subs and I have some thoughts. Short answer? Yes, I still think we’re heading towards a SandRay endgame. And here’s why:
Everyone seems to have come away from this episode mad at Sand, but I can’t for the life of me figure out why because Sand did nothing this entire episode except make it glaringly obvious that he’s not interested in Boeing. He was cordial, he was polite, but he never crossed that line between friendly and flirty. I think what people are mistaking as lingering attraction is actually just that caring personality his mom talked about at the beginning of the episode. In fact, Boeing says as much: “You never yell at me. That’s why I like you.”
This is just who Sand is. He doesn’t get mad at the people he loves no matter how badly they hurt him.
If Sand had tried to hide Boeing’s newfound presence in his life from Ray, I might be worried, but he didn’t. And I don’t think he had any nefarious intentions in sending Ray away when Boeing approached them at the bar. I think he was probably trying to avoid exactly what ended up happening because he has plenty of evidence to know that when Ray gets jealous, he gets passive aggressive (and suggests threesomes!). And it’s not even like he sends Ray away out of the blue. He only does it when Boeing starts playing games. “Oh. Sand didn’t tell me he had a boyfriend.”
I think Sand was looking for closure and knew it would be best to get it alone without having to worry about Boeing and Ray’s warring egos. But I do think it’s important to note that even when Sand and Boeing are alone, Sand defends Ray. Boeing says Ray clearly isn’t his type and Sand snaps back, rightfully saying that there are more important things in a relationship than how compatible you are on paper.
I actually came out of this episode much angrier at Ray than I was at Sand. I mean, you can kind of see what he’s trying to do—if you squint—but he’s going about it all wrong. He’s trying to show Boeing that Sand is his, that he doesn’t see him as a threat, and, as I said here, I think he’s also trying to show Sand that he’s willing to do whatever he has to do to keep him—even if that means sharing him with someone else.
The problem, obviously, is that Ray and Boeing are both treating Sand like an object here. Not a real person with real feelings. And Sand is rightfully pissed about it.
I suspect this problem will be resolved fairly quickly in the next episode. Sand is going to finally start yelling—at both Boeing and Ray—and hopefully Ray will learn that Sand doesn’t just want his money or his body. He wants him. No one else.
Honestly, the couple I’m most worried about right now is BostonNick. Don’t think I didn’t notice that Nick never actually said yes to being Boston’s boyfriend. He gave him the exact same runaround he gave Daddy Dan earlier in the episode. I think we’re heading towards a right person, wrong time ending for them, which I don’t completely hate. They both still have some growing left to do.
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Is Gwynriel a crackship?
The characters don't have chemistry -
Gwyn threw Azriel a withering stare as she strode past him. “See you tomorrow, Shadowsinger,” she tossed over a shoulder.
Az stared after her, brows high with amusement.
Azriel couldn't help his soft chuckle.
Pure amusement glittered in her stare.
He offered her a crooked smile.
Gwyn asked Az, her teal eyes bright, “What do we get if we finish the course?”
Az’s shadows danced around him. “Since there’s no chance in hell any of you will finish the course, we didn’t bother to get a prize.”
Boos sounded. Gwyn lifted her chin in challenge. “We look forward to proving you wrong.”
"I blame Cassian for this. He's too busy making eyes at Nesta to notice such mistakes these days."
Azriel laughed. "I'll give you that".
Gwyn smiled broadly. "Thank you".
Azriel dipped his head in sketch of a bow, something restless settling in him.
Cassian glanced over at Az, but his attention was fixed on the young priestess, admiration and quiet encouragement shining from his face.
The characters never interact -
Azriel had winnowed her and Cassian here after training, but hadn’t lingered. Apparently, Gwyn wanted him to go over dagger handling, so he’d left them with a promise to return in an hour.
"You're turning the blade a fraction as it comes parallel to the ground," Azriel explained, drawing his Illyrian blade from down his back. "Watch." He slowly demonstrated, rotating his wrist where she did. "You see how you open it right here?" He corrected his position. "Keep your wrist like that. The blade is an extension of your arm."
And when Gwyn reached the finish line, bloody and panting and grinning so wildly her teal eyes glowed like a sunlit sea, she only extended her battered hand to Azriel. “Well?” “You already have your prize,” Azriel said simply. “You just passed the Blood Rite Qualifier. Congratulations.” Gwyn gaped. Nesta and Emerie halted. But Gwyn said to him, “That was why you invited them?”
Nesta asked Gwyn, “But it seemed like you didn’t know what we were doing.” “Cassian and Azriel warned me that we’d be watched by males today, but didn’t specify why.
“The courses?” Gwyn asked. “Different routes,” Azriel said, “from various Qualifiers over the centuries.”
Succeeding in the Blood Rite didn’t mean the training stopped. No, after she and her friends told Cassian and Azriel most of the details of their ordeal, the two commanders had compiled a long list of mistakes that the three of them had made that needed to be corrected, and the others wanted to learn from them, too. So they would keep training, until they were all well and truly Valkyries.
I think it's pretty evident that not only do Gwyn and Az interact but in a short period of time their interactions have already turned playful and competitive.
Certain groups in this fandom believe chemistry only equals sexual chemistry but people in real lasting relationships realize that chemistry is more than that. Sexual attraction can fade but emotional chemistry is what leads to a relationships staying power.
Emotional chemistry is what makes a relationship special and different from other relationships.
Az has had hunger for both Mor and Elain. He's felt protective of both Mor and Elain, arguing against them doing anything dangerous. He's questioned why both Mor and Elain were not his mates and felt he would taint both Mor and Elain. Really, there's nothing all that special between the way he treats the pair of them. Sure, he never lent anyone TT but he also never sat out of battle after Mor begged and pleaded. He never had a recently turned fae female in need of a weapon while the female he loved for centuries asked him not to fight.
In an SJM romance, her endgame pairings have both sexual and emotional chemistry but the sexual side of things doesn't always happen right away. For example, Rowan and Aelin didn't have sexual chemistry for quite a while. They disliked one another at first, which eventually led to friendship, which eventually built to sexual chemistry.
A crackship would be Gwyn and Tarquin who have never met. But Gwyn being flirtatious towards Az, Az being amused by Gwyn, Az showing admiration for Gwyn, Az believing in Gwyns ability to make it through the Rite, Az feeling something spark in his chest at the thought of her happiness, Az imaging her teal eyes lighting up, Gwyn being the only one his shadows dance for (both in SF and the POV), knowing that not only has Az already spent time interacting alone with Gwyn and time with her during training but that he and Cassian are going to be continuing her training, we can safely say Az and Gwyn are not a crackship. We know Gwyn likes males as she said her chance to lie with a male for her first time was taken from her and she did not show any fear being with Az alone in the dark in the middle of the night. So it is not "ridiculous" to think that he could easily be someone she'd place her trust in when she decides she's ready to take the next steps in exploring her sexuality (something SJM will decide she's ready for and not petty readers within the fandom).
And the fact that he treats Gwyn differently than the way he's acted towards Mor and Elain, the fact that SJM had Gwyn and Gwyn alone spark something in his chest, are possible clues that their chemistry is the real kind and not the fleeting kind that sexual chemistry sometimes is when it's missing the other things that are important to a lasting relationship.
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No disrespect to the gif maker at all when I say this, because it’s a beautiful set and I do actually agree with the parallels, but to me this is a wake up call as to why they need to follow through with Eddie’s queer awakening arc.
I still haven’t forgiven the writers of AE for what they did to SR’s character. He spent three of his own films learning to move on from the past only to regress and undo all of that development in his final arc. He literally went to live in the same past he’d spent all that time moving on from, chasing after a woman he never even made it to a first date with, a woman who’s DEAD in present day and had lived her life already, and abandoned all of his friends and responsibilities in the present.
I cannot abide Eddie suffering a similar fate where he does nothing but cling to the memories of a dead woman whilst watching his life pass him by as he gets stuck in a time warp of repeating the same relationship mistakes again and again.
Not even gonna make the super obvious Buck/Bucky comparison here, because there was no chance in hell of the latter becoming a love interest lolol, but AE did do their friendship so dirty. Yet the former actually has a genuine, real, looking-way-more-than-likely-based-on-all-available-evidence chance of becoming the endgame (no pun intended) love interest to his best friend.
So, never mind all of the other more obvious arguments for them becoming a canon ship, they NEED to follow through with this for the sake of good storytelling, because I don’t ever want to feel as angry about a piece of media again as I did about AE and the assassination of SR’s character 😂 They cannot let Eddie suffer the same fate as Steve.
#Don’t mind me here#To this day I STILL get angry when I think about that film lolol#I’ve never felt the same about that franchise since#My ramblings
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Hi! What did you think about the latest OMITB episode? I really liked it, but felt the revelation that Sazz's body had been creamated was eccessively brutal, even though the word BULGARIA engraved on the protesis did make me laugh. 🤣
I wonder if Oliver and Loretta are really going to get married! I need them to remain together at least 😌
I Need Theo to come back for at least one episode (preferably as Mabel's new and endgame love interest).
What was your favourite scene?
Hope you're having a splendid day!
I loved it!! It was such an interesting start to the series - I know it’s about murder, but even then, it’s mainly been light - the series taking a dark turn is fascinating!! And I’m here for it!
I’ll miss Shazz, grew to really love her in the end. But the Bulgaria reveal got me!! Evidently the killer is someone after Charles (see text: “Not your fucking friend”) and someone with a brain cell (eg. Replacing the glass and getting rid of the body) but still leaving mistakes. (Like the blood on the oven handle/glass left ((saying that, if it was a bullet, evidently it’s someone in the arconia, because they’d need a window to access from. If not, great aim))
and yes I need Theo to return too. I loved him, honestly loved him last season. Come back Theo!!
Oliver and Loretta!! Augh. I love them together. Meryl Streep is an amazing actress, anyways. But I hope they get married, and Oliver never lose that flamboyant attitude of his. Both of them deserve the world.
Scared for Charles this episode. They probably won’t kill him off, but leave the man alone, dude!
Mabel is fantastic as always. Adore her.
probably my favourite scene was the last one - dark, hard hitting, and leaving me with 10,000 theories for the future episodes.
hope you’re having a lovely day!
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I loved and hated playing Star Ocean Till the End of Time (Endgame Stats)
May 30, 2024
I stopped playing Star Ocean Till the End of Time yesterday. I made it to the final boss, but this is a JRPG so you know there are at least two forms of a final boss. I couldn't beat the final-final boss (God help me if there was a 3rd form), and after 4 attempts I decided I was DONE. I asked myself, "Is finishing this game worth me getting this upset?" and the answer is NOPE.
Game: Star Ocean Till the End of Time First Time/Replaying: First Time Game Time: 50 hours (incomplete) Console: PS4 Started: April 22, 2024 Finished: May 29, 2024
"Why don't you go back and level up?"
Because I don’t want to. That’s literally why. It’s not fun leveling up in this game.
• The save points do not replenish your HP/MP. • Your characters die if their MP reaches 0. That’s not a typo… they actually die with 0 HP or 0 MP… so not cool. • You are limited to 20 of each item. • You can't even stock up frequently because shops (and inns to rest at) are few and far between. • You don't get ANY item drops after battles!! • In battles, there's a 5-second waiting window before you can use another item. Very annoying when you revive someone with your limited Revive items and they die again during this window you had to wait before you can use Blackberries (heals MP). • Very few locations have a healing circle, so it makes grinding for levels tedious… as explained above! (If you play this game, my biggest tip is to level up in an area with a healing circle.)
What's so hard about the final boss?
I can beat the 1st form easy, but when it comes to the final-final boss (2nd form), this mf is super fast. He casts frequent, wide-range attacks that hit all of my characters. So as I am trying to revive someone because THEIR MP IS AT ZERO (not even their HP, but their MP), I'm having to wait before I can use another item, and in that waiting time, my character is dying AGAIN. I'm basically stuck in a loop of trying to keep my characters alive, that I can't even attack. And my other 2 characters aren't attacking enough either because they're just dying. *internally screams*
"All that work and what did it get me?" 🎶
I fought every single boss and made it through every dungeon using the same battle method: attack, heal, attack, etc.
And now, at the very end, the game wants to be like, "Well actually, you're doing it wrong and you need to be stronger." Bro what? I'm literally here. I'm at the final part of the game. Evidently, I am strong enough and should be able to beat the final boss because I'm here. I fought all the bosses up to this point?! Make it make sense.
And to be fair, I can admit my own mistakes: I did not invest enough time in the item creation system, and I did not level up past level 56. Would a higher level have helped? Maybe, but I’m not re-doing all those dungeons. I’m not re-doing all those boss fights. That’s my point: I already did! And at the end the game wants to be a [insert mean name] and make the final boss impossible to beat with the strategy I’ve used all game long? Nope, not interested. I’m done, thank you. Next game, please.
The story saves this game.
The story in Star Ocean Till the End of Time is an awesome sci-fi tale and it has become one of my favorite JRPG stories. It's creative and the sole reason I continued playing the game even when I was annoyed.
Backtracking a bit, the design of the dungeons are quite complicated. You don't simply start at one point and end at the exit. No, no. Not in Star Ocean 3. In this game, you enter one place, go through a door, then another door, take some stairs, end up somewhere else, then go back, take the other door, that leads to another door, then you wind up over here, and by the way the exit you actually need is the one way over there. On the other end. Not here. *internally screams*
But this is where the story comes to save the day. Once you (finally) exit the dungeon, the game delivers with a cutscene of dialogue that fuels the story and hooks you back in. It's quite impressive actually, to make a game that is so annoying and also amazing at the same time. I was sick of it, but needed to know more. So, props to the game devs for making me feel annoyed and amazed.
Overall
I love the first Star Ocean (First Departure R) and I plan on playing it again for a third time because it's such a fun game. I had hoped that I would love Star Ocean Till the End of Time just as much, but I didn't. While I think the story saves this game, my recommendation to anyone would be to watch a cutscene movie of Till the End of Time instead of playing the game itself. In my opinion, it's just not worth playing. But the story is worth watching!
#star ocean#star ocean till the end of time#star ocean 3#finished#jrpg#jrpgs#game review#endgame stats
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Hi! So I left byler tumblr after the fiasco that was volume 2 and I just kinda came back, and I see that you and everyone seem to be back on thinking byler is 100% endgame? Can you explain me what happened, and why are people still hopeful after mike's monologue?
sure! i literally just scrolled all the way down to my posts in early july to see what we were all thinking and wow it was a rollercoaster. good call just dipping out and coming back when we were back on our bullshit lmao.
so after volume two came out i think all of our initial reaction was sadness or anger but it was also a lot of confusion. i was so beyond confused at first especially when i got to the last scene and they framed all the couples and byler like that. after looking at my first posts after volume 2 i was pretty doubtful it would happen but i kept on thinking about the closet framed kiss. that was the number one thing that kept me wondering bc WHY would they do that if hes not in the closet.
about a week later was the first time i saw something that really made me think differently and it was actually from a mlvn shippers perspective. idk if this was anybody elses true “wait a damn minute” moment but for me it totally was. it was an anon sent to a byler blog from a nonbyler shipper who was rooting for mlvn (one of the respectful, normal ones) and they were basically saying they dont understand why all the bylers are so sad thinking they got queerbaited when to them, again someone who was rooting for mlvn not byler, the fact that the monologue seemed like a copy/paste of wills speech in the van only made then lose hope in mlvn bc it didnt seem sincere. that was so wild to me.
what brought us back to confidence in byler was mostly just us stepping away from the initial shock and disappointment of the monologue and remembering all the things that originally made us confident in byler endgame. i posted this towards the end of july where i just list almost everything that i held onto, not really as sources of evidence, but just genuine questions of what the hell the purpose of all of them were if not for byler endgame. most queerbaiting is just little things they could get away with but with byler the show would have genuine plotholes if they didnt go through with it. none of mike wheelers actions post s2 make sense if hes not in the closet.
i think overall it was pretty slow to get us all back to the point of 100% certainty of byler endgame tho. now i never see anyone saying they have doubts but all summer that was basically everyones posts going back and forth and i dont blame them. i used to hate the monologue and genuienly think it was a mistake but now i think with the potential of mike getting vecna’d and called out for him lying to el, especially with “friends dont lie” being such a huge part of the show, it could pay off so well. and that one anon was right, he was basically restating what will said in the van not knowing that that was wills feelings not els. now i realize its a perfect use of the miscommunication trope.
also just the fact that the tag on here grew tremendously. i think we had around 8k before volume 2 and now we have 300k. hundreds of thousands of people didnt care enough about byler to follow it on here but after volume 2 they realized something was up? thats very telling. i think a lot of people who believed in byler before volume 2 lost hope when they saw the monologue but for people who werent byler shippers, thats the scene that made them believe it was actually happening, which is pretty interesting.
but yeah i wouldnt say there was one specific thing like an interview or script that made us all confident again, it was just slowly remembering everything from previous seasons and the reassurance that one scene does not erase all of mikes questionable actions or all of their suspicious filming choices from earlier seasons.
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sharp corners (whumptober - secret injury)
Tony keeps watching as newly minted one year-old Morgan toddles around her own party, gazing up at all the adults that are here, chronicling her every move. Pepper invited a few Stark employees with children around the same age, and it’s like watching a herd of baby deer muddle around, with no real intentions of going anywhere in particular. They’re just walking because they can.
But they have one very formidable foe in their paths. Sharp corners. Tony didn’t realize how many they had in this room, one of the living rooms with a kitchen and dining space—there are all kinds of coffee tables, side tables, weirdly shaped chairs. Danger at every turn. Or corner.
Peter swoops in so Morgan doesn’t run into the table beside the couch again. They’ve already got one crying baby being comforted on the couch, and every other second there’s another close call. Everybody’s on high alert. No baby is safe.
It’s getting under Tony’s skin.
It’s becoming an unspoken thing, like everybody is afraid to say Tony Stark throws a shitty birthday party for kids, but they’re all standing in front of the corners and pretending they’re not. Peter is the only one being genuine, as always. And Tony can see everything May is thinking on her face.
Morgan stumbles into Peter’s arms, shrieking happily when he settles her in his lap. Since she started walking she usually doesn’t wanna stop for anybody, not even him or Pepper, but she’s had a special soft spot for Peter from moment one. Which doesn’t surprise Tony in the slightest.
He kneels down next to the two of them just as Peter is blowing raspberries into Morgan’s chubby little cheek.
“Can you hold court for a minute or two here?” Tony whispers, so Pepper can’t hear.
“Uh, yeah,” Peter says, giving Tony a look. “What are you gonna go do? Because more Barbies could really, like, liven this thing up. You don’t have the submarine Barbie down here and that’s her favorite one.”
“I’m not gonna go get more toys,” Tony scoffs, shaking his head at him. “I’m gonna go deal with our little situation here.”
“Situation?” Peter asks. Morgan is grabbing at the collar on his shirt, holding onto one of his fingers.
Tony taps the corner directly behind Peter’s head.
Peter narrows his eyes. “What are you gonna do? File them down?”
Tony glares at him. “Just trust me, please. Stay your interesting and endearing self and entertain the masses.” He taps Peter’s nose, ruffles Morgan’s untamed curls.
“Uh, okay,” Peter says, and Tony glances back to see him watching him worriedly, craning his neck.
Tony finds the tennis balls in a broom closet. He bought a lot of random shit when Morgan was born, a lot of shit they didn’t need, or didn’t need at least for another couple of years. He remembers Pepper’s face when he and Peter came back with the ten pack of tennis balls, among other unnecessary things. Tennis balls? Is someone making a career change? Are we getting a dog? Then Peter talked about a dog for twenty minutes, and appropriately distracted her from the roller skates and VR headset in the basket.
Tony gets overzealous, he knows this, everybody knows this. He’ll probably never even use any of the shit he bought in his baby-induced stupor, because he can usually get something better or invent it himself. But he’s glad he got the tennis balls.
He sneaks out of the closet, sliding along the wall like he’s on a covert mission, and that other baby is still crying. Jesus, he knew a one year old’s birthday party might be a miss, but these guys are gonna go away thinking Tony can’t babyproof his place. He marches deep into the kitchen, and thankfully, nobody’s gonna be in here for another half hour or so because that’s when the lunch is gonna arrive. He briefly wonders if everybody is judging their appetizers too, and shakes his head, getting back to the task at hand.
Pepper babyproofed the set of knives, of all things, like Morgan was gonna climb up on this counter three times her height and choose a knife as her new toy. Tony unlocks Fort Knox, and takes out the sharpest one, glancing down at his feet to make sure one of the babies isn’t down there searching for something sharp. He’s alone, thankfully, and he pops open the tennis ball container like a can of cat food, and pulls the first one out. He puts it down on the counter, holds it with two fingers as he lines up the knife, and as soon as steel touches down on nylon, the ball pops away from his grasp and bounces across the kitchen.
“Jesus Christ,” Tony mutters, knowing if Morgan hears that she’ll come zooming in here like an out of control mini-bus, and Peter definitely will, considering the enhanced hearing. He puts the knife down—scoots it closer to the wall just in case—and walks over to the offending tennis ball.
“I am Iron Man,” he mutters, snatching the tennis ball off the ground, popping it from hand to hand. “I can, and will, conquer this foe. No more baby heads bumping into hard corners, oh no, not today.”
He puts the ball back down on the counter again and tries to saw through it.
“This shouldn’t be this fucking hard,” he groans, gritting his teeth.
The ball threatens to jump out and roll away again, and Tony’s getting a little too recklessly angry, the small voice in the back of his mind telling him to settle down.
But that kid is still crying in the other room.
Tony holds the ball in his hand and cuts away at it with his other hand, and it absolutely shouldn’t be this goddamn hard, and he reminds himself to pull his hand away when he gets all the way through the ball—
But it falls apart like a newly cut apple a lot quicker than Tony expected, and he slices right through his palm like it’s what he’d been aiming for all along.
“Shit,” he hisses, white hot pain shooting through him, the blood bright and horrifying red, not something he’d ever wanna see in the middle of his daughter’s first birthday party.
“Oh, goddamnit,” Tony says, grimacing. He glares down at both halves of the ball, and moves over to the sink, quickly running the water over his injured hand.
He knows immediately that this isn’t the kind of wound he can just wash off and walk away from, and he’s seen a lot of shit in his life. He knows he needs to take care of it, and that means Pepper will notice his absence. Then Pepper will find out the dumbass thing he did, and Pepper will be pissed. Nobody ever wants Pepper to be pissed.
Tony watches the blood flood down the drain and chews on his lower lip.
“Hey,” Peter’s voice says, as he comes around the corner. “What are you oh my God.”
It’s like Tony’s heart is sucked directly into his throat and he whips his hand out from under the water, flinging droplets and blood fucking everywhere. And yet, he still hides his hand behind his back.
Peter stares at him. Looks down at the ball, cut in half, the drops of blood surrounding it like some half-assed modern art, and then back at Tony, the guiltiest man in the world. Peter narrows his eyes. “What did you do?”
Tony scoffs, shaking his head. “What did I—nothing. I didn’t do anything. That’s always been there.”
Peter stares down at the tennis ball. He looks up at the bloody knife on the counter. Jesus Christ. “You tried to cut the tennis ball in half to put on the table corners and you cut yourself.”
Tony sighs, holding out his hand. It stings and the cut is still dripping. “Yeah, Pep is gonna be pissed if she finds out I did some dumb shit today of all days. Usually I get a pass—she gets irritated, yeah, but today is not a pass giving day.”
Peter sucks in a breath and nods, moving into a mode that Tony has seen him in on more than one occasion. He opens up the second cabinet, takes out a glove—no, three gloves—and puts one on, depositing the other two on the counter. He grabs both pieces of the ball and tosses them in the trash, giving Tony a withering look. Then he grabs the Windex and starts cleaning up the blood.
“Tony, like, do something, stop just standing there—”
“Right, right,” Tony says, even though his brain is drawing complete blanks, because they’re still too close to the party itself and he’s fucking something else up for Pepper, as fucking usual, because that’s who he is and who he always will be.
“Keep running your hand under the water,” Peter says, a little softer now.
Tony nods, rushes back over, and sticks his hand under the still-running water. Peter cleans the blood up best as he can, ignores the water that was sprayed with Tony’s sad attempt to hide his hand.
“Okay,” Peter says, throwing away the paper towels and the glove he was using. “Okay, okay, we’re gonna make a little compress, then we’re gonna put the gloves on your hands—”
“Explanation for that?” Tony asks.
Peter shrugs. “I mean. You’re the one that can think on your feet. Remember the time I threw the bag of money out of the window?”
Tony narrows his eyes. “How could I possibly forget?”
Peter shrugs again, more dramatically.
Tony blows out a breath. “Okay, I’ll—I’ll think of something.” He’ll think of something stupid, that’s for sure, but Pepper is pretty used to that, so he might be able to pull it off.
“Okay, I’m gonna go to the upstairs bathroom and grab the bactine—” He stares at Tony’s hand anxiously, and looks up at him. “I think we might need stitches.”
“We?” Tony asks. “Can you feel it too?”
Peter narrows his eyes at him.
“No time,” Tony says, waving around his free hand. He turns off the water, gesturing dramatically for a paper towel. Peter hands it to him with a big sigh. “You go get the bactine and the better bandages, I’ll do the compress for the time being—”
Peter keeps looking anxiously at his hand. “Okay, okay, but Tony—”
“Stitches tonight, promise, cross my heart, I’ll let her be pissed at me later, not now.”
“Okay, okay, back in a flash.” Tony watches as he speeds through the hallway, and once he’s out of the danger zone he immediately crawls up to the ceiling and disappears towards the loft. Tony quickly makes a thin strip with a couple paper towels, and presses it on top of the cut. The blood still seeps through, and Tony rolls his eyes. Why in the hell did something like this have to happen today? He should be able to cut a tennis ball in half. It should have been too easy. He should have been able to cut them all in half.
“Tony?” Pepper calls.
His heart shrivels up in a panic. “Yeah, hun, I’m, uh, getting some more of the little—the little vegetables, and the, uh, the peas Mo likes! Yeah!” He doesn’t know why he added the last yeah in there, like a moron, and he definitely didn’t say any of it like a normal human being.
“Bring the carrots she likes too!” Pepper calls back, and Tony wilts in relief.
“Yeah, gimme—couple minutes, I got this, I got this.” He shakes his head at himself, how he made bringing in vegetables sound like some immense task. He holds the paper towels to the cut, his fingers soaking with blood, and he thinks his body is being fucking overdramatic right now, he’s been cut worse without this much blood, it’s just gotta be bleeding like this—
“TONY.”
Peter’s voice, hushed but loud enough for Tony to hear. He turns around, inches from the fridge, and sees the kid standing there at the top of the stairs. In a flash, alright, but how, with the amount of shit he’s holding, Tony doesn’t know. Peter has bandages, bactine, Neosporin, rubbing alcohol, gauze, three of Morgan’s Barbies, including the newly purchased Black Widow one, and...the Hulk Smash hands.
Tony sees where this is going. Peter grins happily when Tony shakes his head at him, and he starts down the stairs when Morgan herself waddles into the hallway.
Both of them freeze.
She stands there, keeping an unsteady hold on her stance, and she looks back and forth between the two of them, letting out a small, nearly silent squeal. They don’t have the baby guard over the stairs today, which is another negligence, but Peter shifts all of his loot into one arm, and rushes down, scooping Morgan up with the other. She grins, babbles something quietly to Peter as he moves fast into the kitchen.
“What are you doing, little monkey?” Tony asks, bending down to look at her. She paws at his nose.
“Tony, you got her?” Pepper yells. “She got away from Diane—”
“Got her, got her, no help needed here, we’re good!” Tony yells back.
“You keep sounding like someone is holding a gun to your head,” Peter says, putting all his supplies down on the counter. Morgan notices the Barbies, and looks at Peter in delight.
“Yeah, I’m—I don’t hold up well under Pepper pressure,” Tony says, tossing away the blood-soaked paper towel and starting the work with the real first aid.
“You got this?” Peter asks, swinging Morgan back and forth, making her laugh.
“Yeah, kids,” Tony says. “Enjoy yourselves. Dad’s just bleeding.” He pushes everything down towards the sink, like on a conveyor belt, and the Surf Instructor Barbie tries to come along for the ride. “I assume I’m wearing the Hulk hands.”
“Yeah, I thought that would be good, better than stupid cleaning gloves,” Peter says, holding Morgan against his hip. “You know like, none of her toys are age appropriate.”
“I know,” Tony says, wincing at the Neosporin. “I go a little crazy with shopping for kid shit. I’ve got you to supervise.”
“And no one’s taking Barbies away from little princess,” Peter says, kissing Morgan’s cheek. She loves that, and she laughs joyfully. Tony’s still got a gaping wound, but he peers over his shoulder to admire them, anyway.
~
Peter cuts up the tennis balls and puts them on all the corners. Tony entertains as the Hulk for almost half an hour, and only slips up about his injury once, which he turns into a dilapidated roar. Everyone has fun, Morgan receives some toys that are more age appropriate, they eat, no more babies run into hard corners.
Peter and May are showing Morgan her new dog guitar when Pepper peels the Hulk hand off Tony’s injured one. She raises her eyebrows at the wrapping which, thankfully, isn’t covered in blood.
The dog guitar plays one long, mangled note, and Morgan claps.
“I knew you’d done something to yourself,” Pepper says, raising her eyebrow at him. “I didn’t know what, but I knew you’d done something.”
Tony grins, and absolutely does not look at Peter.
“And this one helped,” May says, touching Peter’s knee with her foot.
“How do you know?” Peter asks, accusingly.
“I just know,” May says, giving them both the same look.
“Yeah, they work as a team,” Pepper says.
Tony clears his throat. Well, it’s true. “I’m totally fine,” he says. “Just. Dandy. Just a scratch.”
“You need stitches, don’t you?” Pepper asks.
“Yeah,” Tony says, his shoulders slumping. “Yeah, I think I’ll probably lose the whole hand if I don’t get them within the next half hour.” He shrugs with his remaining Hulk fist. “Thor got these for her, right? Or was it us? I know it wasn’t Bruce.”
“Yeah, it was Thor,” Pepper says. She leans in, kissing him on the cheek. “You’re a moron and I love you.”
“I love you too,” Tony says, a little wary of her tone. “You’re gonna make Peter contact Helen, aren’t you?”
“Oh, absolutely,” Pepper says, looking down at Peter.
“Got it,” Peter says, pressing a long kiss to Morgan’s forehead as she grasps at his chin. “Totally fair. Totally.”
Peter and Tony walk towards the main door, shoulder to shoulder.
“I think we got off easy,” Tony says.
“Yeah, I was thinking she’d make me stitch it up myself,” Peter says. “Then we’d both be in trouble.”
“I love you and I trust you, but yeah, no,” Tony says, patting him on the shoulder with the Hulk fist. He hopes the whole process goes quick. The five of them have a date with Barbie in Swan Lake tonight to cap off Morgan’s birthday. Hand or no hand.
#tony stark#peter parker#whumptober#whumptober 2019#iron man#spider-man#iron dad#my fics#this one is a whole mess lmao#baby morgan stark#no evidence of endgame's mistakes here
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I apologize in advance for this monstrosity of a post. But I have to get a point across here. Like...either Byler is endgame and is going to happen, or Will Byers is going to go down as one of the most tragic TV Show characters of all time.
Sounds a little like hyperbole, no? Well, let's just recap. This starts when Will is 12. Just 12 years old. This adorable, sweet, little, innocent bean here. Just keep in mind these pictures for future reference:
He's kidnapped by an interdimensional monster and forced into a dark, cold, lonely place all by himself. He's stuck in another dimension for a whole week, trying desperately to get out, wondering if anyone is going to save him, all while constantly fearing for his life. Alas, the demogorgon did get to him:
And, even after he was rescued, he was still puking up slugs:
All this is from S1. Enough trauma to last several lifetimes. But wait, there's more.
Apparently Will hadn't suffered enough, so they had the Mindflayer set its sights on him. And well, we all know S2 didn't turn out the best for this now 13 year old boy.
And if the mental pain and anguish and loss of innocence of having your body forcefully entered against your will isn't enough, they decided to heap on some intense physical suffering as well:
And to end the series, you have to have the monster literally burned out of you by your own mother while you're tied down to a bed.
Surely our boy has had enough right? Wrong. On to Season 3. 14 year old Will is mostly sidelined this Season, but he's present enough to get ignored by his friends and put down by his best friend for his "childish" interests, a fact that hurts Will so bad he breaks down and calls himself stupid before resorting to demolishing his childhood fortress. The same haven of safety that helped to save his life in the Upside Down. He's then forced to pack up and move from the only home he's ever known, severing all his friendship ties, such as they were.
Well at least they're gonna fix stuff in Season 4. So here we go, and...what? Excuse me....hmmm...okay. So I've just gotten word they in fact did NOT fix things in Season 4. We have Will, now 15 (or maybe actually still 14 since the Duffers apparently FORGOT HIS BIRTHDAY) so happy to see Mike at the airport for the first time since leaving town, get his hug physically rejected (when Mike has no problem hugging anyone else this series). He's then forced to third wheel and watch his best friend/love of his life have fun with his step-sister. He then LIES TO MIKE (something we have seasons of evidence that Will hates to do) in order to project his own feelings for Mike onto El because that's what he thinks Mike needs to hear. And he's then forced to help Mike "confess" his "love" for El as he stands there and hears Mike say that his life didn't really begin until the day Will disappeared?
Guys, even if you don't ship Byler, you have to admit....this is a pretty fucked up life in the span of 3-4 years. My point in posting all of this (and actually depressing the hell out of myself as I looked for all the screenshots) is if they really leave him like this, and Season 5 doesn't turn things around for Will...or maybe even somehow gets worse and they either kill him off, or force him to stand there and fake a smile while Mike and El live happily ever after....well then fuck this show.
They introduced us to this sweet innocent kid, made us all fall in love with his character, then treated him like their personal punching bag for four seasons. If they aren't planning on giving him a happy ending, that's just downright sadistic. After everything Will has gone through, they're going to make him a gay kid in the 80s living in smalltown Indiana in middle America, with an unrequited love for his childhood best friend? A fact that makes him feel "different" and like he's a "mistake"? Overkill for the sake of overkill. Trauma p*rn. And that's just the suffering they've shown us onscreen. Just think of how many nights laying in bed alone Will has had these thoughts about himself. Or desperately wishing that Mike felt the same way, even though he "knows" it's hopeless. Truly tragic.
Yes, other beloved characters in this show have been traumatized too, yes. But they've also all had sustained happy moments that the show has shown us on screen (for characters that were around for more than one season). Every time Will seemingly gets an ounce of happiness it's violently snatched away.
I refuse to believe that the show doesn't want to give Will a happy ending. There has to be a reason for his suffering. And yes, I think Byler is the only satisfactory happy ending. And that's not my choice, that was the choice of the showrunners. They made being in love with Mike his whole character in S4. Gay pining at its finest. Trying to intro a new love interest at the last minute isn't going to cut it. I'm not going full delusional like before. But I do believe that S5 Byler has a good chance of happening. Otherwise...it kind of taints the whole experience.
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if i could chat with the duffers abt storytelling this is what i would nerd out with them about:
the narrative tension between will’s coded love confession and mike not realizing it yet is sooo juicy and well done because it wasn’t even an explicit love confession if will were to have said it in the first person. stay with me here.
“these past few months, i’ve been so lost without you”
“i need you, and i always will”
“i’m scared of losing you, just like you’re scared of losing me/el”
“you make me feel like i’m not a mistake at all… like i’m better for being different.”
deeply affectionate, definitely, but their friendship has always been like that. if will had just said it in the first person, mike wouldn’t have even thought of it as explicitly romantic tbh…
but it’s the fact that will coded his own feelings with el’s name, mike’s romantic partner, that is going to expose will in the end. and the fact that will brought it up as a solution to mike’s relationship problems and romantic insecurities. mike is going to have to contend with that part and that’s what will make it so satisfying.
the duffers used the circumstances, rather than the words, to code will’s confession and make it evident to the audience that truthfully, mike is most romantically fulfilled by will, as opposed to el.
they didn’t have will say “el loves you”—that would be boring. once mike found out about that, he would be like “oh okay, so will loves me?”
instead, they had will say “el needs you, misses you” etc. we as the audience filled in the blanks from the circumstances alone—that’s what mike is meant to do, too.
mike will not immediately realize “will loves me”—he will realize “will needs me, thinks highly of me, completes me”, and he will have to think critically about what that means for him. mike will have to piece together the ideas one by one—
i want to be needed, i need to be someone’s protector, i need someone who misses me like i miss them. will told me i was the one who saved him and that he needs me, and that makes me feel like i’m flying, so that means… 🤯
they also used mike’s uncomfortable monologue to show that mike returns will’s feelings, but doesn’t know it—and the awkwardness of the monologue, how terrified mike looks to say it as will urges him, the way they filmed mike with that super uncomfortable choke shot (shoutout to whoever first pointed this out on here, i don’t remember ur username!) and an ice-cold color palette is because he’s saying it to el, the wrong person for him.
(contrastingly—mike’s scenes w will this season have a very warm color palette. but in surfer boy pizza, he’s wearing blue, his face looks washed out, and he’s surrounded by metal.)
i see why the duffers did it this way now if endgame byler is what they want… bc will could have literally told mike that he loves him and wants to spend all his time with him, and mike would still take it platonically bc i honestly don’t think he’s ever considered the possibility that 2 boys could really be together.
but when the truth comes out with this context that will used his own feelings to sub in for el, who’s with mike romantically……..mike won’t be able to interpret it any other way. he will be forced to see what he needs to see.
so this was the duffers’ way to play with that tension between heteronormativity vs queer love, platonic vs romantic feelings, truth vs lies, love vs not-love, and make it narratively interesting (rather than it just being a short, cute moment with mild angst, the way i believe it would’ve been if will had simply confessed).
they had to put will’s feelings in a heteronormative package for it to get properly delivered to mike in a way that would register.
this entire “piggybacked” love confession and delectable back-and-forth between an unknowing mike and will was the duffers’ way of making byler seem like the most natural thing in the world amidst the homophobia and heteronormativity of the 1980s setting—and plenty of the GA.
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This is gonna be my last post here before the season comes out. I feel like at this point the stage has been set, the reviewers have spoken and overall we have evidence in our favor and some against us. So we shall see.
But I guess I just wanted to ponder about the worst case scenario, in the case that Byler ends up being unrequited. 
I would have a few questions. Why the hell would Mike be ignoring Will again if he’s just a friend and Mike’s not repressing anything? We already saw that in S3 and he realized it was a mistake and supposedly learned from it. How could Mileven be painted as mature and positive (endgame material) if they’re still doing the same shit they did in S3? Because even if you don’t take into account Will’s crush on Mike, what kind of dumb ass couple are they that they can’t ever socialize normally with their friends? They’re the only couple in the show that have this issue. Lumax are normal. What is Mike’s storyline this season about? Realizing he loves Eleven? I though he already did? Having issues with Eleven because of immaturity? That was the entirety of S3.
Why make Will in love with Mike if they just wanted to explore his sexuality? Just to be cruel and leave him lonely and miserable? The one gay kid? Yikes.
What would be Eleven’s growth if she constantly goes back to this middle school relationship with Mike that literally fosters nothing good for her and has been holding her character back for about two seasons now? Is the plot finding herself to come back to Mike? S2 and S3 already did that. The first time was cute, the second one was painful because that’s when all the cracks in their relationship became excruciatingly obvious. Jesus Christ they “fell in love” over the course of a week at 12 years old, when El didn’t even know what a romantic relationship was. In the midst of Mike’s best friend being trapped in an alternate dimension. Then they didn’t see each other for a year and when they reunited all they did was make out and fight…ponder on that please. The Duffers have done nothing to show us what these individuals have in common, how they’re also friends and compliment each other. They’re together, yes, but is it due to being in love or merely a sense of comfort to cope with the trauma they’ve experienced?
Think about it, and then think about it again and tell me how unrequited Byler makes any sense. It doesn’t. It’s a disservice to all 3 characters.
Not to mention all the build up from previous seasons. I hope the Duffers made the right choice!
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I came across a post again about how Sarah has said that she likes her love interests in books to challenge each other and have banter and so on.. and it just got me thinking a little abour e/riel because I do not see how they would ever challenge each other? Elains solstice gifts are obviously funny and the closest we have gotten to any banter between them, but it's never from Azriels side, while with Gwyn we saw him joke around a bit more, and we know he can be funny with his dry humour, so it's not that he can't have banter with anyone. He won't challenge or push her to be her best self either :“There is an innate darkness to the Dread Trove that Elain should not be exposed to.” so I just... Is there any way you can see them actually challening each other?? Im struggling to see how Sarah would be able to suddenly make them, it would change their characters so much from what we know, but maybe there are still ways to make them challenge each other? There is a lot to learn about both of them ofc, but it just seems unlikely at this point?
There are many lines in the series that have me agreeing wholeheartedly with you, many times where Elain made a comment and Az could have moved the conversation forward but didn't, but this one always stands out to me as evidence for the lack of banter we'd see with e/riel:
Az told Elain their near kiss was a mistake..... AND SHE APOLOGIZED TO HIM.
🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯
Compare that to what Elain said to Lucien the first time they ever met?
Our girl was like "I'm irritated with you and you're about to hear about it".
That is how SJM endgame couples interact. If after knowing Az for nearly two years Elain couldn't say something other than "I'm sorry" when he was the one who started leaning into the kiss then rejected her, then it's clear to me these two will never be open and honest with one another. Elain should have responded with a heated, "What?! After all the looks my way you suddenly think this is a mistake?! What did I miss here??"
If Az couldn't say to her "hold that thought, Rhys is calling me" and instead chose to lie to her and hurt her feelings, then he's clearly not deserving of her.
"Peace and quiet" might be a romantic concept for some in real life but it's definitely not the stuff fantasy novels are made of.
Two characters who are currently "supposed" to have feelings for one another yet have only ever exchanged a total of around 20 sentences over the course of 4 books and 2 years is not a true romance in the making especially not for SJM. I think Gwynriel shared about 15 in one book and engaged in way more banter when they're not even friends yet.
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S4 Vol 1 Reaction/Analysis
This will contain spoilers, as well as my thoughts on Byler in S4 as a somewhat grounded person.
I'm probably in the minority here from what I've seen, but I found the season so far disappointing. That sounds a bit harsher than I want, partially I was too hyped and it does stay interesting enough to watch all 9 hrs in one day without getting impatient, which is saying something. But I was hoping for more? I was hoping for S1-level quality and it felt more like S3 again, with a more interesting villain but a less funny script. I'd give it a 6.5-7/10 if I were handing out ratings.
Aside from the entertainment value, what was particularly disturbing were the writing mistakes. They knew Hopper was going to survive before they finished S3, but they didn't set up any logical way for him to get out, just dropped him to the floor. And magically he didn't die during the explosion even though in S3E1 everyone on the floor level did. Wtf?
Then Will's birthday. Look, I ship Byler, but I'm not a Will megafan or anything. I don't care on a personal level that they forgot about Will's birthday. But guys, they forgot about Will's birthday. There's no other explanation. This is not going to be explained away in Vol 2. It's over. Jonathan and Joyce, and Will himself, did not all simultaneously forget his birthday. Will was already upset on that day and he didn't bring up that it was his birthday too? It would've been so easy to add in: they could've been doing Will's birthday party at the rink, it could've been a birthday dinner at the house. They just completely forgot.
And what's more deeply worrying for me is what that says about the writers' attention to detail this season, and what that in turn means for us theorizers. They completely missed Will's birthday despite it being prominently discussed in S2. They don't know their own show. How much of our theorizing to apologize for inconsistencies (e.g., my theory about Eleven never leaving the water tank) is just overanalyzing mistakes on their part? How are they able to weave intricate stories with subtle clues through Easter eggs left and right when they miss something so blatantly obvious?
Finally, Byler in S4. Anyone with two brain cells can tell that Will has the hots for Mike this season. (This translates to 85% of the general audience from what I can tell on Reddit, yes there are still a few that things WHOOSHED for.) So imo one-sided Byler is canon. What I've said above, however, calls into question a lot of the proposed evidence for mutual Byler in past seasons. This doesn't mean Byler can't be endgame, but if it is, it's less clear that it always was, or what their reasons are for making it so (perhaps trying not to queerbait or satisfying Byler shippers or whatever). There are undeniably rainbows throughout, but even that could have ambiguous meanings.
What's more concerning on the mutual Byler front is Mike on two occasions proclaiming that he and Will are "friends". If they were trying to be clear that they weren't doing mutual Byler as endgame without queerbaiting, that's what I'd expect it to look like. They aren't doing anything clearly though, as Mileven's problems leave some window for speculation, and what are they going for with Will's storyline anyway? It seems like Vol. 2 will be required for any certainty to be reached. Mutual Byler is absolutely still possible.
But I would caution any readers not to get OVERLY attached to mutual Byler if only so they don't get hurt. It's totally possible that Mike's monologue in Vol. 2 will be to Eleven finally telling her he loves her. It's also possible people predicting Will will be threatened by Vecna are right and that will cause some change on Mike's part. There's still some hope, I just don't want to see people hurt is all. I used to think Stranger Things was above queerbaiting but I don't know anymore.
On a personal level I just want to see things done well, whatever route they go with things. But honestly the writing so far doesn't give me confidence even of that. We'll see...
Finally, I've seen some speculation that they won't give Will a label this season. I could see that, but ffs he is clearly into Mike, who cares if he's specifically gay or bi. His feelings towards Mike are 100% going to be made explicit, probably to Mike himself.
#stranger things#stranger things 4#st4#stranger things 4 spoilers#st4 spoilers#stranger things analysis#byler#plot holes
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