#no comment on his end B)

[lucabyte]

🐮

[zazikels]

welp since some of those shitty leaks turned out to be true, those rook's rest leaks are going to end up being true and from the very bottom of my heart i wish c*ndal a very never get work adapting anything again i hope by the end of this your reputation is worse than benioff's and weiss's because it's all you deserve.

[bumblingbabooshka]

Fake Voyager Episode: Tuvok gets kidnapped and forced to compete in an arena where telepaths fight one another to the death for a shot at fortune and prestige. He was initially kidnapped as 'fodder' - the aliens who run the arena will grab any telepathic alien they can find regardless of skill and they're essentially just there to be killed by flashier veterans of the bloodsport. The episode is mainly Tuvok showing off his tactical know-how and combat skills. We also get several flashbacks to him as a young man, learning how to fight both on Vulcan and in Starfleet. There's a concern that he will lose himself when forced into this seemingly endless battle, surrounded by violence, but in the end he prevails and manages to escape without killing a single person. He leaves the arena after giving a message of peace. Patreon | Ko-fi

Unnamed Goon: [Laughter] That puny 'Vuulcan' didn't land a single hit for all his bluster. Once I sealed his telepathic powers it was over! Huh huh huh… If I keep up this pace I should have him crushed beneath my fists in- What...? I can't move...? Tuvok: By now you have surely noticed it.

You are certainly a formidable opponent. Most would assume you to be a simple bruiser but that is not the case. You are a knowledgeable telepath - able to not only bolster your own physique but nullify the telepathic capabilities of your enemies.

However. You rely too much on one tactic and are too proud to allow yourself to look 'weak.' This was the ultimate cause of your ruination. While you gleefully battered my body about the field I was able to locate twenty two out of twenty four 'kobat sfek' on your body - points which will render you immobile for approximately…four minutes. More than enough time. It was a shrewd precaution to nullify my telepathic ability. However. I do not need them to best you in combat.

Even now, I am ten times stronger than you. Unnamed Goon: T-Ten...TEN TIMES!? [Imagining the sort of gruesome end that might await him, the unnamed Goon faints - leaving Tuvok the victor.]

[fox-mulder-gets-pegged]

Rewatched the episode of House MD where Kutner dies and I honestly think instead of killing his character off, they should have said that Kutner got a job as physician to then President Barack Obama and that's why he was leaving. Objectively funnier since his actor did leave the show to work for Obama and I know it would have driven House nuts that Kutner was ditching to go play doctor with the President instead of getting verbally abused for House's amusement.

[r0bita]

The conversation between party members before confronting the Kaiser and Logic is kind of bittersweet and tragic in a way, because everybody talks about their plans for the future after they survive.

Some of them would probably never have come to make these conclusions had they not made it all the way to the end with you, but neither you or your party make it back to the train after ending A and-

jeez...

And would their doppelgängers ever carry out their final wishes after the fact??? Would they know??? Or would they just carry on in the world, as if the players had never got off in that train to begin with?

[petrichorium]

Adding to my list of one piece fics that I would like to hypothetically get around to is a crazy threesome fic w kuzan and koby while the latter is captured by the Blackbeard pirates……….

[hauntingblue]

NAMI NEEDS TO GO UP THERE AND FIGHT BIG MOM I AM SO SERIOUS!!! THIS IS A BATTLE FOR THE ROMANCE DOWN TRIO!! SANJI DO NOT DARE TAKE HER SPOT!!!

[penelope-regulus]

Him

[crossbackpoke-check]

18 + swaymark!!

oooo thank you!!

#18 - pleaser, wallows + swaymark

okay i know they are canonically obsessed with each other but. the song is in some ways about feeling like you’re failing in your relationship and being not quite as obsessed with them as they maybe are with you, and in this video of them talking about being a tandem, there is the slightest pause before swayman answers “do you miss him?” that makes me want to probe a wound. we’re not talking irl reasons of how that’s an absurd question (how do you miss him. you’re coworkers you’re seeing each other all the time) we’re talking that maybe this whole goalies-in-love thing got blown out of proportion and now swayman’s having to buy into the bit too hard. linus loves it & everyone’s asking about their bromance & how they love each other so much and the thing is—linus is safe. he’s got a wife and plausible deniability and jeremy? jeremy is gay. sure, he can crack jokes and people-please but the more people ask the more they're going to find out until maybe they find out something jeremy doesn't want them to know. and the longer this goes on, the more jeremy has to sit at linus' dinner table with linus and his beautiful wife and pretend like he isn't a little bit in love with him. and you know what? the longer it goes on and linus doesn't dial it down jeremy does stop being in love with him, because it just feels cruel, until he finally is done enough that he stops biting his tongue and ruins the moment.

[shrinkthisviolet]

YET AGAIN I’m struck by the Savitar & Nora idea beam 😅

What ideas? Currently two:

a) s5 Nora actually getting captured by Savitar when she and Barry make their trip back in time, also Nora spills her and Barry’s whole plan to Savitar and calls him “Dad” (because, ofc, she thinks he’s Barry), so now she’s in his lair, at his mercy, and Barry is who-knows-where

b) s7/Present Nora has flashes of s5 Nora��they’re not quite the same person but not quite different either. This is usually during dreams. But for some reason, this intensifies when she and Bart somehow land themselves in s3—now the flashes are more frequent, resembling visions more than dreams…or resembling memories. Maybe they get themselves captured by Savitar, maybe not (they could just cross paths with him frequently but keep evading him), but Bart is very weirded out (and highkey worried) by how much his sister knows about Savitar and the past in general

[ask-cloverfield]

or you could have a story that didn’t require juggling

[vulpinesaint]

classmate who told me that they thought i might be a poser bc i wore "too much black" a couple weeks ago told me this week, slightly horrified, that they thought i might be "kind of a dark person" after i delightedly scrolled through stick figure violence images to show them + our other group member. no matter what at least i am still fucked up and strange in the eyes of normal people...

[darabeatha]

          Tezcatlipoca; who’s speciality is pulling out hearts while someone is still alive:

[cinnabeat]

i grt mad when other people get mad at the fact roxas came back bc like. i get why bc roxas story is a Tragedy but its just so unfair in my opinion to see a character who fought so long and hard to be his own person and have his own agency and to just EXIST as himself seperate from where he came from and who others want him to be and then just have to sit there and watch as he accepts the inevitable and realizes that for all he fought for was for nothing and that in the end he HAD to go back and give up his person for someone else like that just SUCKS man like im all for a good tragedy but i hate seeing other characters succeed and then other just get beatdown when they literally try so hard to just exist like it does not feel good to me roxas deserved to be his own person and for all that going back to sora and accepting that was an important part of his character i still think its equally important to let him live the life he and his friends so desperately wanted. and, also, if you were fucking paying attention, youd know that roxas did in fact have his own heart seperate from sora and its both doesnt make sense and is cruel to literally leave a heart trapped inside someone else especially when you KNOW hes still there bc his emotions keep leaking out of sora and you literally see him superimposed on sora all the time his presence is STILL THERE and he deserves a life outside of sora

[adreamfromnevermore]

AU Where the Justice League forms as usual except for one slight difference where Bruce just so happens to have been the one superheroing for the longest. (Excluding Diana, who got up to it in World War 1 and then mostly didn't while she learned about Man's World)

Bruce helps form the Justice League, ignoring all of the comments as they come to the sudden realization that Gotham's baby cryptid story is actually a man in a very intimidating armored suit who can and will break your arm if you cause problems for him. They are unaware that this is not the first team he's led, and actually he's used to teams full of mostly teenagers who also happen to be his children. This should be easier, this team is primarily adults.

He realizes rapidly that he doesn't understand these people.

His kids take bonding activities to mean learning a dozen different ways to break someones leg. That doesn't fly with these people. And that is most of Bruce's ideas, hell when he was a kid Alfred took every opportunity to get him out of his room and mostly that was with the agreement that Alfred would teach him how to defend himself. He's come by it honestly.

This team is not easier. They have more drama than when his house was actually full of kids. It's insane. He doesn't know what to do with it, usually he just sent the kids to their rooms or grounded them from patrol. That doesn't work here.

He comes to a strange crossroads. That falls apart when he forgets who he's working with and snaps at Hal with a full room of heroes that the next person to throw a punch or an insult without a reason too will be sparring with him.

A long standing rule in the batcave that worked two fold to prevent infighting between the kids and too ensure that they were well and truly trained.

It works wonders. No one says a word out of line for the rest of the debrief. Bruce becomes the unofficial mediator of the league over Clark because anytime he walked in on a fight it suddenly became 10 times more civil out of sheer terror of what he'd do to them in a sparring match.

Eventually they actually meet his kids. Well, one kid.

Half way through a mission (one of the rare ones in Gotham) the Bat comes to a complete stop at the edge of an alley. Every single league member on the team comes to a stop behind him. Slowly from the shadows of the alley a man in a red helmet stalks out to greet them.

"You don't call, you don't write"

"Red Hood."

"Don't Red Hood me! We've been worried sick!"

"I was at the cave last night."

"You didn't answer my texts B. You always answer my texts."

Somehow it ends with big and scary following them through the rest of the mission with a running commentary of how much Bats has let him down in his failure to respond in a timely manner to a text send less than an hour before he ran into them in the alley. It only ends when Red Robin shows up.

And even then it only ends because Hood can't keep himself from throwing a punch and Bruce has to snap at him that if he throws another one they're sparring when they get home.

And by god is Jason giving up the chance to punch his brothers.

[mikkeneko]

In various places -- here, the bird app, even YouTube comments -- I keep running into people with some variation of the same question:

"Does Scum Villain have a teacher/student romance?" And every time I want to answer with: No, But Also Yes, But Also Not Really, It's Complicated (And That's On Purpose.)

Which is an answer that's too long to fit in a tweet or a YT comment, but fortunately tumblr has no (effective) post limit! So here I go.

1 - No

In the very straight forward porn cliche sense of "oh but professor, I really ~need~ to pass this class or my life will be ruined, can't I do ~anything~ to get you to change my grade?" *bats lashes* and "Hoho, my pretty young teen student, I've got your good grade right here in my pants, if you ~apply~ yourself..." then no.

No sex or romance between a teacher and their student in the bounds of a teacher-student relationship happens in this book. No deliberate grooming of an underage student on the part of a teacher occurs in this book. No sex or a romance between an adult character and an underage character occurs in this book, nor is the adult 'waiting' for the minor to reach adulthood to initiate one.

2 - But Also Yes

No sex or romance between a teacher and their student in the bounds of that relationship happens in this book. Two people who were formerly in a teacher and student relationship do enter into a sexual and romantic relationship by the end of the book. Also the nature of the society they're in further means that even though they are no longer in the schooling environment, it is socially assumed that the deference owed by a student to their teacher lasts forever, even after the student leaves that environment, and they continue to regard themselves and refer to themselves in those roles even though the teacher no longer strictly speaking has authority over the student.

Also, the student was really hot for his teacher even when he was still a student. (The teacher was oblivious to this fact.)

3 - But Also Not Really

By the time sex and romance is even on the horizon for these characters, their relationship has so drastically changed from that of a "teacher and student" that it is barely recognizeable as such. The power/authority dynamic between a teacher and their student is subsumed pretty much entirely by the facts that:

A. The 'student' has become a medeival fantasy warlord of such unsurpassable magic and might that literally no other person in this world can stand up against him, 'teacher' included, and the 'teacher' is well aware of that.

B. Also, the 'student' is metaphysically endowed (heh) with the Protagonist Halo, a literally active force within the setting they're part of, which means that not only can he not be defeated, he ontologically cannot be denied anything that he desires; what he wants, he gets, and what he doesn't want, cannot be forced on him.

C. ...But also, the teacher in this setting is a metaphysical outsider to the world order the student is part of, which means that he is aware of all of the above, and can and does manipulate it to suit his own agenda, which may or may not align with giving the student what he wants at any point in time. Assuming that the teacher has the correct understanding of what the student wants. (He doesn't.)

D. ........But also also, for all his power, one harsh word from him can destroy him. For all his knowledge, one tear can devastate him. (Which one? Both.)

4 - It's Complicated (On Purpose)

*throws the chalk against the wall*

Between a teacher and their student, who has the power? Between an emperor and a scholar, who has the power? Between a hero and the villain he is predestined to destroy, who has the power? Between a character and the reader who's read ahead to the end of the story, who has the power? Do we find some of these power imbalances more acceptable than others? And if so, why do we?

Trying to track Who Has The Power or Who Has An Unfair Advantage socially, physically, and metaphysically between this particular pair of characters is damn near impossible and that's on purpose.

The Scum Villain's Self Saving System is a lot of things, but one thing that absolutely defines it is that it is a parody. It's a parody and a deconstruction of a lot of things -- the 'stallion' genre, the 'isekai' genre, the 'pay-per-chapter webnovel' genre, the 'gay drama' genre and, most relevant to this conversation, it is a deconstruction of teacher-student romance.

What kind of a teacher-student romance has a clueless, fish-out-of water NEET in the role of the Wise Old Mentor? What kind of a teacher-student romance has a black-hearted, demonic, domineering feudal warlord in the role of the Blushing Virginal Student? What kind of a teacher-student romance has the two principals so close in age -- by the end of the book, they may be as little as a year apart -- that they're more like peers than teacher and student? What kind of audience are we, going into a story like this one and finding ourselves cheering for the teacher to fall in love and lust with his student, only to be disappointed when that doesn't happen because the teacher fails for three books straight to recognize love and lust when it's literally looking him in the face and crying?

Asking "does Scum Villain have a teacher-student romance?" is sort of like asking "does Galaxy Quest have a lot of high science fiction concepts?" No, but also yes, but also not really. It's complicated, and that's on purpose.