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dragynkeep · 3 years

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Irish-American musician speaking. I just want to say a couple of things (a) i appreciate that other people are at least willing to criticise Jeff (even though i don’t agree that he was copying “ethnic” styles of music because that’s just bullshit and he was just going for a specific feeling, because that’s how music works) and (b) i really appreciate that this blog takes James' character seriously and not whatever the fecking hell the writers think they've done.

i did want to say that i'm really upset about it as a person with an autistic specturm disorder. i doubt the writers (bless their hearts) realised it, but the semblance they gave James is one of the hallmark signs of ASDs, especially in adults and young people. given the way they've always written him until the end of season seven, i really related to him and his struggles for a variety of reasons. i could get just as angry about the way they've portrayed military service (my dad is a similar ranking to the character and has been through some shit) especially given that a lot of people in my family have or are serving, but i get the sense that everyone sees how problematic that demonstration is. the former is a lot more subtle, and it honestly upsets me more.

and then there's all the bullshit surrounding Penny (they should have just left her dead or given Winter the powers to begin with for fuck's sake). firstly, i'm just going to come out and say that i've hated the way they've used vocal music to bash us over the heads with messages the last few volumes. Cinder's TWO (whyyyyyyy) songs in just that one episode this volume were basically narrating what was on screen which took away from the moments and the second one during her fight with her mentor was just plain bad. i thought those two were the worst we were going to get but apparently i was wrong and we get whatever the hell "Friend" is. (although i will say i bet the only reason they threw in that second song for Cinder was because Casey just had to get publicity for her shitty band). but look. i'm lgbtqia myself and it really (especially considering Penny and Ruby's intereactions) felt like queerbaiting/bury your gays but i'll set that aside. making Penny human (a) took away the only unique/interesting thing left about her character and (b) her death was essentially a glorifying suicide "for the greater good" which really slaps in the face of people who have honestly suffered from depression and suicide.

this isn't the first time that they've shyed away from trying to explore serious subjects, but it is particuarly gross because of the song. an earlier example of them doing this is with regard to "the path to isolation" when Casey felt the need to say Weiss has never cut and that she wouldn't do that. while that was (to say the very least) a bit uncomfortable for her to just drop that, it sounded like she just wanted to avoid talking about the subject because it's too dark. i have a lot of problems with Casey and her actions over the years, but i think it's important to note that SHE WROTE PENNY'S SONG. she is the one responsible for this, and she keeps talking about how great it is and how "humbling" the experience was. bitch no. you can't just take only praise and get mad about critisicism to the point where you basically recieve none anymore.

besides, Casey is pretty hard to understand because she STILL doesn't enucniate much when she sings so if she and her dad are going to keep being basically worshipped hand and foot by people while recieving no criticism even where it is due, then they shouldn't be in this or music. part of being a musician is that you SHOULD be critiqued by your peers and even by just casual listeners but that doesn't happen and they (but especially her) don't improve. by no means do i think Casey and Jeff are the worst of CRWBY, but they are part of the problems with tone in the storytelling and they should be critiscised for it more.

oh god this is a long ask & it’s like a month late, please forgive me.

yeah, my issue with the whole jeff issue was never that he was “copying” ethnic music, though there is a discussion to be had when that music comes from closed off cultures like my own & others & how that should be respected, but that this vague claim by someone who’s lied to push their headcanons before was using it to claim ruby & summer were romani coded when there has been anti gypsyism sentiment in crwby before via arryn’s sexualization of us. i simply don’t trust these white americans to write any gypsy ethnic groups’ stories with any sense of respectability & it was on a baseless headcanon anyways so. that frustration was easy enough to let die down.

i also have a lot of issues with how ironwood was treated, especially as a disabled person & some of the fndm’s insistence to treat this fictional military as a 1 to 1 representation of the flawed militaries in our world is just utterly frustrating. especially when they use that to justify theirs & crwby’s ableism towards one of the few disabled characters we had on screen. i don’t have a place to speak on any autistic representation or harm from ironwood or his semblance because i’m not autistic but i am sorry that you were harmed & upset by this portrayal of a semblance that isn’t even canon, because it features nowhere in the text explicitly. hell, ironwood’s va had to be told what his semblance was from a fan. all this harm & hurt & it’s for something that isn’t even featured in the story. ridiculous.

i’m really trying not to waffle on in this ask because it is so long already but yes yes yes. i agree with you completely, the way that songs are crafted for this world & featured into it most of the time doesn’t fit with what we’re shown on screen. weiss’s songs feature a patriarchy & go over the same arc like five times, as well as those lines alluding to self harm. jeff & casey can cry that they didn’t mean it that way but there are certain themes brought to mind with certain wordings & you have to be mindful of this when you write them; we had this same issue with people believing mercury was sexually abused by marcus because “i’m the one” featured the word defiled, which is most used in a sexual context. when we come to learn that it meant his soul was ruined by his father stealing his semblance, that still didn’t erase the sexual allegory & jeff should have been mindful of those types of themes when he’s writing these songs. often times it feels like the songs & the show are giving us two different stories & both give off different meanings & themes.

not being able to take criticism seems like a common theme in crwby, self admittedly from miles himself who said he “wants” to take criticism but doesn’t like it when “it’s done in a mean way.” that criticism has to be fair & nice, which is a solid sentiment, no one’s going to listen if you’re being an asshole but here’s the rub. nothing is ever nice or fair enough for them. they always find a way to turn even the most innocent of criticisms or questions into a personal attack & it’s pathetic. jeff & casey aren’t exempt from this. like you said, part of being a musician is criticism from your peers & much like you don’t need to be a chef to tell if there’s dogshit on your plate, you don’t need to be a writer or a rock star to tell when a story isn’t making sense or a song isn’t good.

& for fucks sake, i’m with you on them needing to enunciate better. i’m hoh, please jeff & casey, it’s hard enough for me to try & listen to songs that i want to enjoy without having to wonder what word you’re mumbling for this third rhyme in bad luck charm. fuck that song’s rhymes.

#rwby #rwde #owl.txt #answered #q #long post /#im so sorry it took me this long lmao #Anonymous

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atmilliways · 4 years

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Toki and Pickles, 2, 6, or 9? Any or none, whichever speaks to you. :)

[2+ characters and a number meme]

2, Kissing. 6, Comforting one another. 9, In bed/non-sexually sleeping together.

YOU GOT IT, ALL THREE. 1277 words, lol. Implied Charles/Pickles, sad because it’s set between Black Fire Upon Us and Renovationklok, Pickles is having a bad night and Toki just happens to walk in on it and try to comfort him, and some smooching happens.

You Know What Admitting Sadness Means

Both of these men are competing starfish. They’ve known this for years, since the early days of getting stuck with each other as hotel roommates when on tours, before they had enough money for the big fancy bus with separate rooms, or even hotel rooms that had two double beds instead of just one. Back in those days, Toki’s hair had still been short and he’d always, always slept with a shirt on, even in fucking Florida in the summer. During the other three seasons Pickles, who tended to drink until he felt warm, strip down to his tighty whities, and half-wake up at some point in the night freezing his nuts off, had always appreciated the guy’s ability to throw body heat like a goddamned furnace.

He had actually told him that once, and Toki had replied cheerfully that yes, he knew that, because his soul was already destined to roast over the spitfires of hell for an eternity of torment and pain for not following the rules laid down by a god that did not forget and did not forgive. Pickles had needed to take a few extra illicit substances that night just to get to sleep and forget the hauntingly empty look in his eyes while he’d said it.

These days, Toki’s hair is long and he doesn’t give two shits who sees his scars anymore. Pickles will automatically wake at the sound of retching out of decades of ingrained habit, unless he’s seriously passed out, but otherwise they’re both deep sleepers and don’t much care who flops on who in the night (or day, whenever, time is fake). And they don’t have to share a bed, but sometimes they do because Toki still gets nightmares.

But since Charles died, things have been different. Everyone is withdrawn, shaken . . . and so freaked out by the Revengencer attack that they’ve literally strapped rockets to the bottom of their house and launched it into the sky for security purposes. Toki keeps his nightmares to himself because there’s already enough shit going around, he doesn’t want to add to it.

Except, one night he can’t sleep. The pickled herring he ate earlier isn’t sitting right in his stomach and makes the thought of drinking unappealing. . . . Maybe Pickles will have something he can smoke or snort that will do the trick. He puts on his boots (Mordhaus is a constant construction zone these days, he’s learned not to run around barefoot the hard way) and clomps down the hallway in his pajama pants.

“Pickle?” Toki stops himself just short of knocking, because knocking politely isn’t particularly metal. Instead, he nudges at it with the toe of one boot. The door creaks open a bit, so he pushes it farther and steps in.

The room is a mess. Not that it’s spotlessly clean even at the best of times, but with all the repairs their servants are stretched pretty thin and it doesn’t look like anyone’s come to collect the recyclables in a while. It reeks of spilled beer and spirits, stale smoke, and unwashed sheets—but all that is metal, so it’s probably fine.

What isn’t fine is Pickles, who’s clutching his pillow to his chest instead of laying on it and thrashing sluggishly under just a thin blanket, obviously trapped in a nightmare of his own. Before he can decide what to do Toki steps on a can, and the crunch of aluminum sends Pickles shooting bolt upright with a strangled yell.

“Sorries!” Toki yelps automatically, holding up both hands. “Sorries, Pickle, ams just Toki!”

Pickles stares at him, wide-eyed and panting, then blinks hard until some of the wild, sleep-glazed look fades from his eyes. “Toki?” he asks hoarsely, and coughs.

“Sorries, I couldn’t sleeps and I thoughts maybe Pickle will had somesthing whats maybe helps, ands the door—”

“Toki,” Pickles interrupts. To Toki’s surprise, it looks like his eyes are already red-rimmed, not in (just) a super fucked up way but like he’s been crying. His eyes are even starting to well over. Pickles takes a deep breath, and the rest comes tumbling out in a thin, scratchy wail: “Toki, I couldn’t save ‘im an’ he died an’ he, I couldn’t—H-he’s just dead, he’s dead an’ it’s all my fault!”

Fuck not caring about each other by band agreement. Toki is at his side in a second and pulls the smaller man into a tight hug, a cold lump of metal pressed between their bare chests as though Pickles is wearing some sort of necklace with a pendant on it. Tears form in his own eyes because he knows exactly what Pickles means. Toki hasn't dreamed about Charles, but they’re all feeling the guilt these days. For not appreciating him enough when he was still alive. For not getting there in time to save him. Hell, even if Toki had gotten there earlier he still would’ve been too loaded to be of any use, Nathan would’ve had to do it all alone. . . .

“Ams not your faults, Pickle.” Toki tries to reassure, but at the same time this feels like what he’s witnessing might go deeper than simple guilt. Pickles is shaking, pressing streaming eyes against Toki’s shoulder and bawling into his chest. This is something far more raw and brutal, devoid of any of the trappings of pretending not to care. Right now Pickles clearly doesn’t give a shit about one anyone thinks.

“He’s gone, he’s goooooooooone!”

“Theres there,” Toki mumbles, rubbing his back awkwardly—a tiny gesture in the face of a giant tsunami of grief.

He holds him until the sobs die down, until Pickles moves to unexpectedly return the embrace.

“Feck. Toki, I’m . . . I’m real fecked up ri’now, c’you jest—”

“I won’t tell no ones,” Toki assures him quickly.

At the same time as Pickles says, “—kiss me?” The drummer pulls back just enough so they can make eye contact. “Please, jest, close yer eyes and lemme pretend it’s him, jest one last time. . . .”

“Whats,” Toki starts to ask. He’s interrupted by lips crashing into his, facial hair scratching and tickling around his mouth.

Pickles kisses him with longing and passion and urgent desperation the likes of which Toki has never experienced before, not even close. The swamping wave tumbles him head over heels, making it difficult to tell up from down, waking him up in ways he hadn’t even realized he’d been tired; the kiss tastes like booze and snot and sleep-breath and dispair. And maybe . . . maybe it is their manager Pickles wants to be kissing, for whatever reason, but Charles isn’t here. God, fuck, Charles isn’t here. It’s just Toki, and Toki wants to comfort his friend (and maybe even be comforted in return, even if his own feelings don’t run quite as deep).

They spend the rest of the night together in Pickles’ bed. Sometimes Pickles dozes off, then wakes crying again. Sometimes they end up making out like their lives depend on it, and sometimes it’s slow and soft and so tender that Toki’s heart aches. But eventually Pickles drifts off and stays there, breathing slow and even against the crook of Toki’s neck; he’s finally gone past the dreams to the other side and is actually getting some rest.

Toki has so many thoughts about everything that’s just happened that he doesn’t expect to fall asleep himself, but eventually he does.

Both of these men are starfish, but tonight it’s less competition and more collaboration. Pickles lays sprawled on top and Toki stretches out beneath him, one arm looped protectively around his friend. Between the two of them, they manage to take up the entire bed.

Even the empty side.

#metalocalypse #metalocalypse fanfic #toki wartooth #pickles the drummer #charles is dead #implied chuckles #comfort tickles #sad makeouts

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f-identity · 3 years

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AmCyb development + Birdbrain’s Ultra Magnus feels

Timeline arranged; soon to compose the paragraphs. Estimated: events of this fan version of Operation: Breakdown might have to stretch across three chapters (including the currently published Ch17 “Breaking Down Barriers”).

Adding the Shadow Partner and their Void Soldiers into the AU is more than throwing a wrench into the existing canon: “it’s more like throwing an entire cereal bowl into the machine’s components. A greasy cereal bowl of oil and bolts,” says Birdbrain. [Further TF:P canon thoughts even farther below cut; time for some UM feels first]

Some chara backstory to the Gable flashback in Amalgam Cybertronia Ch17: the Decepticon sparkling mentioned was raised to be Shrike, whose military upbringing was overseen by Ultra Magnus (at the top level anyway) and a number of middle-ranked sergeants. Within that setting, Ultra Magnus was the one who made sure Shrike wasn’t outright abused by those sergeants.

Ultra Magnus was the closest thing to a parent to Shrike in her early years. He often stated how proud he was of Shrike’s accomplishments, how strong she is.

After her Mistake? In his mind and spark, he knew he could not attribute Shrike’s Mistake to her hidden Decepticon heritage. Even when she admitted that she should have felt wrong or should have questioned the falsified command, Ultra Magnus could only blame Shrike’s too-loyal, too-obedient upbringing.

When she asked if she had permission to terminate herself (because she is now a traitor to Autobots), he almost cried. If he said yes, one of his top soldiers would die a betrayer, a mark of shame on Ultra Magnus and all Autobots under his command. If he said no, it meant admitting that the values he indirectly taught her were wrong. That meant every praise he gave her in the past was hollow, and the way he had raised her was flawed.

He said no, and left it at that. He did not have the strength to admit his own mistake in front of Shrike. What he said instead was that Autobot High Command could put her on trial (court martial, in Earth terms). Optimus Prime heard about the incident and wanted to pardon her.

Unfortunately, Shrike was taken as a Decepticon prisoner during a raid before she could be tried.

Birdbrain: “Ultra Magnus often comes across as a rigid stuck-up who wants everybody to follow the rules and respect authority. But we know a lot of things in TF:P are heckin chaotic, and imposing some form of order in his space is a way of establishing order IN HIS LIFE. It is not right that Cybertron is gone, it is not right that Autobots had to live in constant battle with Decepticons, and he just wants the war to be over. Yeah, Underfoot swore at him because she had her own principles, but those clashed against UM’s own principles.

“And besides, even if he seemed like a strict hard-ass, he actually cares, like a lot. He doesn’t want his allies to be hurt in this extended state of survival and emergency. That’s why he wants the Autobot-Decepticon war to end as soon as possible.”

Birdbrain: [inhales] “ULTRA MAGNUS IS DAD, I WANT HIM TO COME TO EARTH SOON”

Elsewhere in Birdbrain’s domain...

Underfoot: [standing in front of Shrike] “My daughter now.”

UM: -_-

++++++++++

(Spoilerish, relating to TF:P canon being Crisscross after Operation: Breakdown)

Bird asked Nad: “With M.E.C.H. being micromanaged by a rich, actually-high-tech sponsor, who’s to say the Void Squad won’t successfully capture Airachnid? I mean - seriously, Silas? Just FIVE field troopers including yourself to capture a ‘wounded’ Decepticon in the middle of nowhere?”

Silas, on the show: “Suppression fire only, we take this one alive.”

Birdbrain: “What, and no tasers like he used on Breakdown in the previous episode? Da feck did he mean by ‘suppression fire’, just lead bullets? How effective were those against Bulkhead and Breakdown? Did you learn at all, little man?”

Nad: [shuts Birdbrain’s beak before she can wordvomit even further about what will happen after the chapterS they were supposed to be writing]

#birdbrain thoughts #Amalgam Cybertronia #OC: Gable #OC: Shrike #OC: Underfoot #F's OCs

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shianhygge-imagines · 5 years

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{R} [DMC Reactions] S/O Sacrifice Scramble

AN: No, thank you! For supporting my angsty ass during my days of procrastination and getting my life together, lmao! That is an interesting idea! So... let’s take the same scenarios from the original reaction post... and just replace the s/o with another character’s s/o! :3

Let’s be honest... it’s not gonna be a happy affair! And given how the DMC universe is... it’s highly likely something like this would happen.

|Link to Original S/O Sacrifice|

|Masterlist Link|

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dante

Gets saved by Vergil’s S/O

He’d needed an expert with him on a job when it happened. His usual carelessness had gotten a loved one killed.

Dante cried in agony as your head rolled away, remembering how he’d promised his older brother that he’d bring you back safe and sound.

How Vergil had promised Dante a slow painful death if anything happened to you. How Dante had agreed that if anything happened, he would let Vergil kill him.

He didn’t know what to do, going into a full blown demonic rage and butchering the demon that killed you.

All he could think to do after was to bring your body back to Vergil.

The moment Dante returned, the roar of his motorcycle the telltale sign of his return, Vergil had practically flown through the shop front doors. His face didn’t show it, but his heart leapt in joy at your return, longing to hold you in his arms after a time apart.

Upon seeing only Dante standing in the dark, tears in his eyes and a white bundle in his arms, Vergil paused, his mind quickly connecting two and two together. “Y/N?” Vergil asked for you, his lips twitching to fight a frown. When Dante only met his twin’s eyes and tearfully looked away, Vergil took a step back. “No.” He denied, eyes shifting to stare at the human sized bundle in Dante’s arms, “She can’t have…”

“I’m sorry, Vergil.” Dante tried to apologize, but his brother practically snarled in denial.

But little by little, Vergil’s mask crumbled when a hand fell out of the bundle. Your hand. Your wedding ring. You. Unmoving.

A sob escaped Vergil’s lips before he could stop it, and his legs suddenly gave way as he could only stare in despair. You’d loved him during his darkest time, and gotten him through it. And you were dead.

Was this karma for all the harm that he’d done in the past? Was this the world taking its revenge against him for nearly bringing the end of humanity two times?You were supposed to be his redemption. His salvation. That you were gone… did that mean he was damned for all eternity? That he was destined to stand alone forever.

He’d wanted to spend the rest of his life with you, but now that was a distant dream.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Vergil

Get’s saved by Dante’s S/O

“Gah! Fecking hell, Vergil!” You screamed, practically diving into the swarm that your brother-in-law had sprinted into. From behind, you could hear Dante calling for you to let Vergil do his thing. But from his position on the cliff below, he couldn’t see the number of demons that awaited his twin.

They’d finally started to have some semblance of a non-toxic relationship again, and you were damned if you would just let Vergil get himself killed.

Dante had only just gotten his brother back, and it made you happy that the brothers had started to mend their relationship. If anything were to happen to either brother, you were sure that their relationship would have been set back by a great deal. And with how much you loved Dante, you couldn’t allow anything to happen to the only surviving member of his family.

That was why you threw yourself in front of a fireball, suffering through burns in order to protect a man that was usually frigid in demeanor despite his turning over a new leaf. And the pain was unbearable, your skin melting and clothes burning. You were only able to verify that Vergil was unharmed before you collapsed into his arms unconscious.

Vergil knew that he was a class A jerk to you, so he was surprised that you, someone who only held a small fraction of demonic blood, would throw yourself in the way of an attack that might have left him incapacitated, but not too severely injured.

He caught your falling body as it fell in front of him, surprise flickering on his face for a brief moment before he schooled his expression.

The demon that had burned you so badly shook in fear at the icy malice on Vergil’s face after he’d laid you on the ground and covered your damaged body with his coat.

“Y/N is precious to someone important to me. I hope you’re ready to suffer through a slow and painful death.” Vergil hissed, unsheathing the Yamato with a deadly ring of metal.

After the demon had been dealt with, Vergil calmly picked your body up from the ground, noting that you were still alive. With the still unsheathed Yamato, Vergil quickly opened a portal back to Devil May Cry, where he gave Dante the scare of his life by immediately barking out instructions on how to treat your wounds.

After you had been treated and left to rest, Vergil would break the news to Dante like ripping off a band aid. “She saved me from an attack.” Vergil saw the punch coming at him, but didn’t move, letting his younger twin land a strike to his face.

“Next time, you better be the one looking after her.” Dante growled, clenching and unclenching his fist, beyond furious that Vergil had been so negligent as to let you get hurt.

Knowing that there would be a next time because of your stubbornness, Vergil nodded. “Next time, I’ll look after her.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nero

Get’s saved by V’s S/O

As loathe as Nero was to have to take you along on a hunt, he didn’t quite have the balls to defy you when it was your fiance’s life on the line

A few days prior, several demons had appeared to attack V, vowing revenge on the Sons of Sparda, blah blah blah, like you hadn’t heard that reason half a million times.

Due to having been a part of Vergil, V’s continued existence was sustained through absorbing demonic energy, much to your surprise and confusion on how that would work in the first place.

During the attack, V had been alone except for his demon contracts, Shadow, Griffon, and Nightmare. Normally, this wouldn’t have been much of a challenge for the four of them, but V had been severely weakened after Vergil ‘resurrected.’

Not only did the attacking demons manage to severely wound V, they had also taken it upon themselves to steal V’s demonic power. The only thing sustaining V was his contracts with Shadow and Nightmare. Griffon had decided to forge a contract with you in order to help. Now, you and Nero were racing against the clock to kill the demon that housed V’s power.

Despite not having an upraising involving combat, you held your own whenever demons appeared, brandishing V’s cane and a rifle borrowed from Lady.

“A Bride on a Mission” Griffon had called you after you struck down a demon with no mercy.

Despite being able to hold your own, you were under no illusion that you could kill the demon that had assaulted your fiance and left him for dead. So, when you saw Nero getting backed into a corner, still reluctant to use his Devil Trigger, you commanded Griffon to give you a boost, sending you soaring towards Nero.

Though you stuck the landing wrong, earning you a twisted ankle, you’d managed to blast through part of the horde. You didn’t get to celebrate your victory much, when you felt the painful end of a horn dig into your stomach and send you tumbling backwards.

“Y/N!” Nero cried out in alarm.

Now, normally, you tried not to curse... but laying on your back with a hole in your abdomen, you couldn’t help but let out a swear, “Fuck!”

The demon that had stolen your fiance’s power had come out to play, and you were pretty much down for the count. Nevertheless, you propped yourself up on an elbow and aimed with your rifle. “Heh, I’m not dead yet, you fucker.”

Nero, meanwhile, had finally started to take the fight seriously, blasting through the rest of the demon horde before advancing on the bastardization of a bull demon that had attacked you when he wasn’t looking. “Hey! Do you know how much trouble I’m in now that you’ve poked a hole into my friend’s fiance?!”

The banter was a front. Nero was scared shitless that he’d have to bury another friend and break the news to V... who might just find a way to kill him for not looking after you.

Activating his Devil Trigger for the sake of killing the beast, Nero followed the battle up with picking up the crystallized demonic energy embedded in the bull demon’s horn before using his Devil Trigger to get you to a hospital.

Somehow, between getting checked into the hospital, and waking up from surgery, Griffon had left you to return to V, who found out about what had happened and immediately brought himself to the hospital to yell at Nero and look after you.

When you woke up, V sat in a chair beside your bed, one hand holding yours and another holding a book. Seeing you awake, V set the book down and gently chided you after making sure you were okay. “Please, Y/N... Don’t do that again. I couldn’t bear it if I lost you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Get’s saved by Nero’s S/O

For the sake of this request, we’ll say that Nero’s S/O is different from Kyrie (even if it’s the canon pairing >.>, The reason why I have to clarify... well, that’s a story for another time)

V had long since retired from hunting demons, instead, investing his newly mortal life in learning about the world with the help of you, Nero, and Kyrie.

He was only a month old when he’d assisted in defeating Urizen, and had barely grasps the basic human mannerisms and fundamentals. Like the use of money, or the fact that a bullet to the head would kill him, or your personal favorite, that he had to consume food for survival. Truly, when Nero first introduced you to V, you thought him to be a child.

Though, the first thing you did after meeting him had been to take him clothes shopping. Sure, it was summer, but once the colder seasons rolled in, you were sure that V would need proper shirts instead of... the trench coat corset thing? You’re amazed the thing didn’t come apart during his battles.

There were a few times that V was forced to fight demons, either to absorb their demonic energy in order to extend his life, or to beat off random assaults from demons that swear revenge upon the Sons of Sparda. These times were increasingly annoying for the young man, as he’d long since separated himself from Vergil.

Most of the times that he’d get attacked were during his walks in the streets of Fortuna. It was a beautiful town with old architecture, so V often found himself observing the towering structures.

One day, you decided to accompany V on one of his strolls, taking a sketchbook along just in case you found another spot to stop and sketch while V took his time looking at the building designs.

It is unfortunate, then, that while the two of you were doing just that, Shadow popped out of the ground beneath you, growling in warning as several demons decided to claw out of the ground around you.

Despite having V, Griffon, Shadow, and Nightmare with you, your group was quickly overwhelmed by attacks from all sides. You’d never had to fight in your life, and by not having a weapon on you, you were just a burdening presence. That didn’t stop you from calling out enemy presence in the street and slapping bitches with your sketchbook, mind you. You were unprepared and untrained, but damn it you weren’t going to be a useless damsel.

This was foolhardy of you, taking on demons despite the fact that V probably had it all handled... especially the fact that V had asked you to stay back from the demons. You didn’t listen to your fiance’s friend, and so when you’d taken a shot at one of the downed demons, raising an arm up to slap the mofo, you suddenly felt pain, and heard a thump to the floor. The blood that trickled down your arm brought your attention to the fact that you were now missing your non dominant hand.

“Fucking hell!” you screamed, wanting to panic and flail around as V quickly took care of the remaining demons before hobbling on unsteady feat towards you, unbuckling his belt to tie it around your bleeding arm.

“Y/N...” V called your name as he applied the make shift tourniquet, “Y/N, which way is the hospital? We need to get you to the hospital soon, or you really will lose your arm.”

The two of you sprinted with as much haste as possible to the hospital, you trying not to scream in panic, and V, trying not to imagine your fiance’s ire as he held your severed arm.

The minute you entered the surgery room, Nero arrived on scene at the hospital, and practically accosted V, “What the hell, V! Y/N’s not a demon hunter! You’re supposed to protect them!”

V, already feeling guilty for being unable to protect you, winced and responded with a calm voice, “I should have had Shadow escort them away, that was my mistake. But your fiance is as stubborn as you, Nero. They wanted to help... and now they may lose their arm... or not. You did regrow your arm after all.”

Brain running a mile a minute and having already decided that he should now at the very least teach you some basic defense, Nero growled, “That’s not a normal thing humans can do, V. I know you’re still getting used to being a real boy and all, but...” Nero simply sighed tiredly. “Just... make sure you watch their back when you’re with them, okay? We were lucky that they’re not half dead.”

Hours later, your arm was reattached, but you made stump jokes that made Nero simultaneously want to kiss you and slam his face in the wall.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed my work, please consider buying me a Ko-fi!

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danwhobrowses · 4 years

Text

One Piece Chapter 983 - Initial Thoughts

The ending may be exciting but there’s a little bit of suffocation happening in the raid as we continue with One Piece

Spoilers of course, Support the Official Release

Back with the Cover Story and the family reunion happened! Now watch Pound have amnesia...

Fecking Perospero with his ability to make candy waves, Big Mom and co are not out of the picture yet

Looks like BM is prioritizing Zeus over the tank, but the tank has reconfigured to legs, must be something relevant for that, we still haven’t seen Franky yet either

At least Carrot’s being polite about telling Zeus to stop being a snitching bitch

Zeus doesn’t seem to wanna come with though, which will stir the pot nicely

To be fair ladies, Sanji doesn’t hit women so he wouldn’t have been much help anyway...

You tend to forget that Big Mom has a DF that can animate the inanimate, what if she animates something that reveals something? Overall though even in Wano it is a tad terrifying

Oh god Momo, they are fast tracking that to hell, and Queen is with Orochi so it will not be an easy feat to get him

The Zoro stuff has me a little worried...like, Zoro wouldn’t, right? Joy Boy Theories often liked to do a ‘Zoro leaves the Crew’ theory and I always disliked the idea, but come on, not Kaido...he may feign it though to get close, but he’s not even using 3 swords...He can’t go all out just yet, even if beating 500 gifters would do some bounty buffing

Also found it odd that the gifters just assumed that Zoro wanted to be King, that may be where they fail also

Kid and Killer are holding their own though, preying on the distraction caused off-screen when the gifters learn about Yamato...maybe one of the Flying Six is nearby

Yeah, I love Ulti...I didn’t like the official release’s translation last chapter, at least compared to ‘Go, go! Pay-Pay!’ ‘Pay-Pay, dearest’ and ‘GIMME A DAMN PIGGYBACK RIDE’ but her mannerisms are hilarious

Wano is just full of epic clashes isn’t it? Oden/WB, Roger/WB, Luffy/Kaido, Zoro/Hawkins and now Luffy/Ulti

The moment she did that headbutt I knew what Zoan she had though, Pachycephalosaurus - if you’re unfamiliar, think Craniados/Rampardos from Pokémon

My enjoyment of Ulti grows with her seriousness too, she quickly acknowledges Luffy’s strength, exhibits her own Observation Haki to reprimand a goon and gets acknowledged by Luffy, plus her DF is not as bad as I thought Oda could’ve gone

It is a little worrisome though that Luffy feels like he needs Gear Fourth to beat a Flying Six member, it’s like Cracker over again. Though I’m glad they didn’t Blueno her like they did to Pay-Pay

Thunder Bagua raises a brow, Kaido’s kid is here with the Shinigami mask, apples and trees when it comes to power, plus he kinda dresses like Oden

“Come with me if you want to Live”

Waiting huh? Did he put his chips in Luffy’s corner already? Maybe Wano sneaks in volumes of the manga XD

So a good chapter with the surprise of Yamato and Ulti being awesome. But it is still worrisome, while the samurai’s part is slowly succeeding the Straw Hats are being choked out, Momo is due to be crucified and Perospero is gonna provide a little equalizer to Marco and co, unless he attacks Kaido as well...we still need to wonder about Law, Hiyori, Brook/Franky and probably Robin/Jimbei though I am guessing that Yamato found them first to discover that Luffy was here.

But exhaustion is also a big thing, Sanji’s gone walkabouts like he always does but Zoro, Kid, Killer and Luffy are being pushed into corners, same with Nami, Carrot and Shinobu. And there’s still the question mark of Drake and Hawkins, and Who’s Who is now set to cross Luffy’s path now too.

And we have to wait another week for it D: ah well, Oda earned it, anime comes back next week and this sunday is Father’s Day (in the UK at least), but still...lot to be excited for but a lot to be concerned over too

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throwingideasatthewall · 3 years

Text

Clone Wars: Season 2

Episode 1 Holocron Heist

We just had a heist

[One nonsense enough to knock me into nonsensical incoherent rambling...]

Two

Okay...

I’m prepared...

To do. nonsense...

Urgh

Okay..

[Title Screen]

[Woah!]

.... ..

Aight

Okay

A lesson learned, A lesson earned

Oh..

That snapped me out of it,

A lesson earned is a lesson earned

[you don’t need a person to tell you basic common sense you can figure out yourself]

....

Assumed authority is bullshit Don’t need to earn any- [Sorry, Still Recov- er- ing From Last ep- Isode]

Okay...

Any-way

Jedi on a planet . .

Some-how tr ap ped - Surrounded Clones - Right- - Why?

Like - if you needed parts-

Okay-

I’m in

-terested

Any way...

Wait cruisers?

Gun ships? R-escue

Oh wait-

That’s Good

Oh No,

It’s Plo..

Jokes About How He Got His Men Blown Up Just gonna put this over here

Been a while

Also Hey yeah what is he doing here?

Doesn’t he have Jedi things to do?

Get a new fleet?

I mean th- (Don’t Condone Child So- L diers!)

But every time it’s always Obi-Wan and Anakin because all the rest of them are too busy

So What-

Alright - Whelp - I don’t care —-

Whelp — Ex-plo — Is this just going to be an action piece? (Nothing wrong with that; just need a different mindset,)

From the applications of child soldiers - To Shoot-

-Why?

It’s- Nice-

-Droids

Plo-

General-

Ev-

Neat-

Good-

Whelp-

Grab ‘em to the medic And Go!

(Seriously Windu figured this out yesterday.)

Grunts

You’d think the Jedi would give the order?

Seriously, Good miss, Five Min- Got Some One- Killed

“ Asoka,”

First Asoka mention in the first five minutes

[maybe they got her character better.]

-Jungle

You sent- A child

That Logically can’t improvise ... Into a jungle

....

The

Fuck

Skywalker?

Con-tact Her - Dead - She’s very likely dead- - Anyway - Hope Anakin taught her those moves- - That’s a lot of emotion - In the movements; Again;

Monotonous, Stunted, Robo Tot -ic

That’s How Child-

Nope-

Tone’s Off

So, just to go over;

1. Tone ❌ 2. Dia- Log Ue- (?)

3. Move -ment ❌

I’m hop-

Extract-

Taught-

Okay-

Teach -ing s

Aight Mary Sue-

I’m sorry but the light is literally coming out!

Whelp-

Okay-

So it’s Ahsoka an adult yet?

Like that can be explained away as acco-untability

Otherwise, she should have a hard time with one Droid!

(No wait didn’t Obi-Wan just call her ‘young one ‘)?

Nope!

Movie, get over there in your shame corner

That- Was painful over- reacting

And Focus-

I Don’t - You couldn’t have forced it more if you tried -

The Force- d cha- nge i -n Perspective Not Apprec -iate D- . . . . Moving on

Whelp ...

Get In -

That’s a direct order- -

“Can’t-”

Nope!

That’s It-

Tone ❌

Dialogue; ❌,?

Move; ❌ Ment

Turn in your bad

writing card,

Movie

❌

(Not a series strike, Just A “Fuck You, Strike

On the Movie And, This Chara -cter

(We just had such a good-

Maybe; it gets better?

Skipped ahead; It doesn’t

Sigh-

*Puts on earmuffs

Meta-phorically

Aight Back To 19:06 (Original time stamp; Play

*Think

Friendly Fire-

Nvm

*Thing Ex-plodes

In- stantly

Whelp-

You called her before a council ??

Child -ren Can’t Think -

Okay

Movie

Children can’t think-

From ag-

“This is-”.

It should be

-But The writers - refuse to write her as child -

The Pro-

“I-

The Pro- Blem As the story seems to be placing the Jedi on a high pedestal

..... Their actions here as reasonable

..... But it’s not ... If Ahsoka was a child it would be a cruel use of power showing how used only to put the younger generation down before they’re old enough to understand it

And how they’ve given Anakin the illusion of power

-Boomer Bait

If she’s an adult; This would be a show of how she’s childified by her peers

As it stands;

The writers refuse to chose

Concerning, due to the fact that

Child-ify Ing An Adult ...... Is Wrong

And adult-ify ing a child is wrong ...

Un equivocally,

Tally Of How Many Times Ahsoka- Is Adult -ify Ied- ;

This is necessary

[Excuse for odd formatting The “Movie”, (Under the picture) Caused Tumblr To heck up my spacing)

Continuing on;

“Time away from the battle- field,”

Good, For A Child Solider - (And would’ve been a good show that any kind -ness from them is performative ...

“Guard duty,”

Tally Of How Many Times Ahsoka- Is Adult -ify Ied- 1

Cite; Child ren Don’t have that much emotion, Nor Pre- fer ence- -

“Longer now,”

Dick —- Kinda

It’s better for children not to be in battle —

So not a complete dick...

But not optimal...

“Sorry”

So he said by people who don’t wanna take accountability for their actions and just stop doing the thing and stop bringing the toxins into the world

Point; If you were sorry you would stop doing it, stop bringing it up, and do better... —- Trying to control the narrative isn’t nice (When the truth is objective)

Only the self may be both .....

Security -

“Knowledge,”

*Bag-age

“Hm,”

. .. .

...

Fisto

...

In-side

St-upid Forbid Den

Know-ledge

(It’s likely about plants Or Weapons)

Also;

Boomer Bait!

(That’s something they offer younger generations to follow their stupid outdated tradition)

It’s always worse...

(Also, this isn’t about Ahsoka trying to steal the Holocon thing is it?

Because her character is already -hateable- enough

And if she has enough initiative to steal the holocon

- She’s an adult

And should be allowed entrance anyway

“Jedi Council,”

So, lady was a Jedi?

Aight,

Keeping an eye on that ... Aight -

Went through one. drug trip

Already

.....

[Okay...

..Got a Drink of water —— Interrupt -ion

Wait I thought he was just a ball of fuck your plot

You’re telling me he actually works for Palpatine?

After threaten ing Palpatine?

This dude - fucking drug trip -

...Ser vices

I honestly thought he was a [fuck your shit] guy

Now he’s a de tec- tive

Noir ....

Movie that’s too many genres .....

You- need to slow down .

Your main Chara- Isn’t Even Esta- Blish -ed Prop er Ly

Nevermind the characterization

Note if it had been established he changes things every so often that would be neat

As it stands

This dude is a fecking roller coaster

Not any thing resembling good

[Giving your aud- ience a drug trip isn’t good writing]

It makes them dizzy!]

So...

Holocron

Like Palpatine is literally doing this just to fuck over Ahsoka?

Also, this is going to result in Ahsoka being unchild -like To take them out too?

I’ll get the - counter ready

[yes I have seen it literally every Mall cop/ security guard movie ever

The fun . seeing how your (Good) chara cters - interact with the scenario - That’s not happening here - If she was a child this would show how Anakin‘s orders react with the environment

If she’s an adult; We’re working through a checklist; About what we know about her;

Likes, dislikes, how they might come up in a situation...

The suspension... coming when they do

With Ahsoka...

What do we know about her?

Honestly?

We know she likes fighting (Already in enabler of toxic behavior -against other living beings)

We know literally nothing else about her

Except...

That she’s perfect...

Re-moving All Tension;

Deal

I’m surprise he just wasn’t like oh yeah sure,”

[Ditches with the money]

... ..

Oh they’re actually talking strategy

Usually it’s just ‘fuck em’ up And that’s all we ever hear

Er-

Whelp- Yodi’s dead

Alas, Poor Narc

[assuming he can actually sense disorder in the ranks]

Gen. Leader Ship. Tox

He should know he shouldn’t be doing that

Focusing on him self

And practic ing accountability .... Constantly micromanaging and checking in on your peers .. Isn’t going to make them more likely to be accountable..

It’s going to piss them off ...

Your (evident) distrust creating a toxic environment As you were refused to trust their char -acter

You can’t give me respect the guy that was just snooping (Through the whole uni-verse)

That’s the point...

A dis-turbance in the force

Yeah?

Intruders there will be

Okay, bullshit he can see that

Like; Peri-pheral Okay

(Still tox that you don’t expect your peers in a peripheral. to be able to hold accountability)

But this is galaxies away (Ac-tually. on Corousant)

But. He Should n’t Know That-

‘The Narcs pulling authority again, master,”

“Shh, this is what we train- I mean groom - you for!,”

“But You Said,”

(Con-tinuing Earl-ier,)

[Seriously I meant to bring it up earlier,

But are they really inhabiting Zero the hutt’s old hotel]

Like it could just be a Noir hotel

But the positioning and location seem familiar . . .

Tell me...

Who the frick is this? ?

“What you are doing back there?”

... ..

Aight...

Assis -tance

God Lord, He’s Try -ing

Main tenance

If I don’t idea (who this guy was )or what was going on then maybe that would make sense

As it stands, Nope,

Crash- es

What’s that?

....

What?

Seriously. all he did was put another thing into another thing?

???

...

Aww, he actually trusts Bane..

Thank you ...

Door..

Techno Service ... Droid

As in a “tech -nical service droid? (Rt (IT) Tech Guy?

Or a technical assistant (One made of tech)?

(Or one specializing in techno dance moves?)

Also is he supposed to get them in?

Is that thing?

They- didn’t really establish much-

Butler Droid...

Change?

Todo... “You are what I say you are,”

Roomba- kicker

Also, having a roommate is just straight up detective fiction...

Like buddy-cop detective but still detective

With noir, Which is supposed to be focused on independence Dis(trust) in society Which is admittedly (toxic)

Or seems to be

Those two themes...

Directly contra- dictory

[with Griev- ous they made it work, But he wasn’t this - ]

“Uh,”

You are not “The Doctor,” - [that work ed as manif- estation Of Greiv- Ous’s Toxic Be- Hav -ior- And Human Want For Com- Pan Ion- Ship - Or At Least- Vul- Ner- Aba- ili Ty- - This Guy - So far he’s a n(e)igh invulnerable Douche Bag - With No -thing Humane- - Not quite Ahsoka levels - Intend -ed To be an adult - Just- - Really needing to go ham - On the arrogance And inhumanity (He sold his soul for money- But makes it look so good- what he does- Gets a sick kinda enjoyment from it,”)

That’s how you have, to pull it off

As it stands; there’s no emotion with this character

Is the robot supposed to be like his morality pet?

But he’s a dick to him too

Really he gets nothing from me

How do even in the “I-don’t-feel-anything-I’m-so-edgy-and-cool look at me!’

Vibes

There’s nothing fun...

Yeah you can throw all the ...clichés you want in there

[But that doesn’t work if you don’t use them properly]

[I see the team up with a female bounty -hunter]

[Predictable “I work Alone...] The only thing those stories share

In minute]

But ‘once the effect of’ ‘wow that’s a lot of things. Has worn off

The story and character left heartless

“Non-of- your Bus- iness,”

Doesn’t have the cockiness to make it work

[this isn’t power- Ful-]

Down right ..cringe

As it tries to shove shove two genres.. . At least... That don’t Quite .work ...

Least not the way they’re trying to make them work

.....

..Today

It’s noir

The point is no one’s in a good mood.. ...

Aight,

Wasn’t that-

Also, shouldn’t he know-

Based on how open- She is- To un- veiling her mask..

- -

Robot

So sh- ouldn’t she ask the robot to leave the room?

(If it’s such a big deal to her?”)

He can just run their face through a face scan no?

Mid-rim

I thought he didn’t have a way in? [That’s a pretty pathetic way in.. .]

[Palpatine’s screwing with him]

[Giv -ing Him a hard time and satis -iating - The ab- omin- ations desire for blood🎵,

Two birds, one stone,

Also, Movie, That’s the wrong amount of planning for the wrong genre - We don’t care how the bank ro -bbers Art -thieves

Got There

This isn’t Heist - [Money Heist, Not Terr- Esc] Got It Wrong [Pre dict- The Plot-] Last Time. -

The Focus isn’t Character building- - it’s the ‘out of depth characters reaction to the scenario,’

And the wacky hijinks that ensue

Using their talents...

Contrast- ed against the environment (Mall cop example]

Which seems to be the best fit

Stealing the- Holocron- - WHAT WAS THE PURPOSE-

Well- At least they ack -now-ledged Planning really isn’t part of the subset,

Good (For them?)

Aight Impossible ...

What are the emotions?

[like they literally. just through in the “the only place...”

Why..?

So quick rehash (Sorry but I can feel the drug trip coming through,)

(Effects- Of Dealing- With (bad) excess character;

(Deserts Metal...)

[Refresh]

He has a map of the Jedi temple Chip (Oh so that’s what that- (Isn’t he still-)

[Changlin’]

Aight

Bog

[Refresh End]

[Voice acting?

[Mouth sync]

... .. Aight

In Tru-

Maybe take the teen- off guard duty

A thought

[but-seriously

No high Alert?

Only these two..?

Info- -Mation

Baggage

Seriously money would be a better option

�� Or just street cred

(Adult) humans, Aren’t that Liniar...

Any way...

East Tower ....

Well that’s better than some dusty old books - Holos

(Seriously at least that’s present baggage.)

Whelp

Nobody notices this bullshit!

On a supposedly secure a military base .... ...

Also in the Mid- day break fecking daylight! (With the hiest it made sense, That was a hostage political situation Meant to draw in a huge crowd;

How?

Cool Alright,

Hey isn’t she supposed to be standing still?

(Guard)

Doing patrols?

Like no emotion, Face Forward, Professiona -lism

Not Greeter

(Didn’t they literally call it guard duty?)

Like just say you’re sending her to library service...

Assis -tance

Again, Wrong Field...

They’d be talking to the library helper (Official) Con-

Bother

Not how a child reacts Tally Of How Many Times Ahsoka- Is Adult -ify Ied- 2/3

Cite; Asoka shows intentional over involvement instincts more befitting of an adult ....

Good

Fully understand able reaction (Kinda)

(Don’t yell at children)

Don’t over involve yourself in the future ....

(But if you’re an over- involv ed and (un-)childlike abomination (Getting shoved for this is likely going to happen)

Dude was actually nicer than an adult

Enabler

(Rule Of Excess Society; While excess verbalization is ex- pected, Getting in someone’s way (non-sport Ing-) (Or con -ferr ed-) U-pon

Is not, Attemp ting to move them away the customary five times is expected)

Aight,

So the librarian was right there as she harassed her client)

(Not saying; But you should get involved in tox that doesn’t involve you)

Just don’t think that would excuse Her from ire

“I can’t do anything right,”

Tally Of How Many Times Ahsoka- Is Adult -ify Ied- 3/4

Cite; Child -ren Aren’t aware of self Ahsoka would repeat a line blank -ly

“Likely ‘sorry’

Then back away

[Or the or dered rea ction-)

Aight

Whelp

Yes

Just at the librarian be the pro tag

(She’s Tox But.. . Less Tox.. ...

But Still..

[Make [Better] Pro-ta g Than Ahsoka ]

In.. ...

That’s a library computer..

You need a pass- word. - The robot-

How?

What?

Weak Point?

You know for Boomer bait They mis-construe How the library works a lot

[I know -Hav- Ing Dealt-]

Talk-ing in the library,

Is pretty off

Like there’s a reason people are encouraged to go into the hallway to take phone calls

Loud

These are the guys that value meditation

Dude. Would be shushed By Several irate Jedi ...

Told to take it outside ... ...

I-

[I feel bad For the Roomba]

[like dude, gaslights him and then takes his memory]

Like, Adults Out of it. ...

But ...Droids

[we don’t know much about the sentient ones Or how much senti ence]

But this whole scene...

Makes me feel dirty

Like; it’s played for humor

When; it should be played to how much a bastard this guy is

Screw- ing with anything-

Like That ...

Toxic ...

Sick..

How?

Aight..

What. .

Re- Cyc

Why? ... ..

Kenobi

Jump-ing coincidence

[i’m con -clusion]

Damn, the narc

[No one tell him anything]

[Might fake a heart attack]

Comm.

[How half assed is Yoda’s peripheral?]

Venti -lation

-That’s Smart-

Almost -Too -Smart-

👍

-Tower

High Alert

Place the Temple -

Wasn’t, already?

Left it undone

Way to go smart guy - Cool - But kinda pointless..

Aight- Never mind

I- Might’ve Been Wrong-

Al right

[Seriously, no one hears this?]

[In most heist movies they at least had the intelli- gence-

[No hate -villains can be stupid]

Do you some small well re-lativel unknown library

[or at least not the one at the place they were robbing]

Because everyone would recognize that the actions occurring match up to what he’s describing And the description Of their building.]

Aight

Neat-

Past

Whelp-

Aight-

Shred- (Un-acc Oun T-able)

K-Pop

Well that’s a name...

Whelp..

Cool.. ..

Bane ...

Whole.. temple

And I heard you very obviously plotting...

So... you’re getting kicked

Also he could be possibly looking up intruders plans.. ...

Like pretty one dimensional opinion of on ‘High Alert’, lady

[Especially for a librarian.]

Thank you

Whelp...

There went my expectations

Also, Every Jedi leaving the library didn’t notice that that shit?

Like, they didn’t have guard’s ready to apprehend him

...On the Other Side?

Okay...

You just moved her...

Do you know this could’ve been an episode with a lot of emotional depth Showing how terrifying adults that abuse children can be adults that swear to have their interest in heart And how overinvolvement Is harmful regardless of who it’s coming from (Neglect- of child- And - accoun tability) Working off the “blank line”, ‘I can’t do anything right,’ And the Jedi -Council’s treatment of her “Foreshadow -Ing,” (I use that word loosely)

Their down- fall

Instead we got this-

And he just abandons the computer-

Aight, Just contin -ued on - with -out his instruction

Despite see-ing how bad that went. Al-right

Okay-

Aight

Really?

Without instructions?

Calls friend

You were fine without him the last few seconds .....

“Give-”

Not gonna question that?

“Voice-”

She’s a changling..

“Now,”

Hidden

You’re in a vent?

Oh, Skywalker has immediate intuition ...

And a breech didn’t somehow sound off alarms

Yeah. . Good..thing you didn’t close up the thing ..

Whelp..

How?

Okay. .

Shame.. they didn’t get a hold of a force sensitive kid (I- don’t want it to happen)

Just-

.. .

.. Here

Hurry I can Hear.. . Bull- Shit .

You have rocket boots they have the force

You shouldn’t hear shit-

Sur-prisingly, No Ahsoka

Good

The lower the counter stays..

The better for humanity

[and my brain]

[Vent]

Seriously, you didn’t tell your partner? About the Jedi on High Alert?

Ser- Force-

How deep is that thing?

[Aight, Pat-

You’re telling me they still haven’t figured out the Holocron?

We only saw-

Shouldn’t one of you go one way and the other go the other?

To cover more ground?

They’re- Really putting a lot of faith-

In the Comms

Also shouldn’t there be more Jedi crawling over the place?

Seriously, it’s just these two?

[We know Plo isn’t doing anything important.]

[We saw him near the opening?]

And Kid Fisto..

Heck... Is everybody else doing?

A-ight

“Closer,”

Shouldn’t it be ..further

Archive.. [Library] Comms?

Got it-

Whelp..

Okay..

Not, putting up that door,

What are you smiling about?

There’s plenty of lasers

And you don’t even know where the thing you’re looking for is

(Inside the compartment)

....

Aight

Might- not have been a smile-

Look for the open vent

(Dude clum- Un- Acc ountable)

With Vents

Also look at all these assholes standing around doing nothing

Also, no one’s going to check up on the child

Like, Ahsoka surely got that message right?

Temple-

Deep in the temple-

Use-less

...

‘Cause you’re idiots who don’t check for open vents Or cover more ground?

Or...

[Get, anyone to help you, in this big ass vent,”

It’s not very hard to see why.. .

Ass -itance

Ahsoka’s, not gonna get blamed for this is she?

Won-

Yeah, the narcs pretty useless

Also, why can’t you have the dude just shut off those lasers like he did the rest?

Done

Oh, they address it

Good,

Yep,

How?

But...

Okay...

...

Okay

....

What’re you still doing ...

Okay,

What’re you doing?

[Is the Holocron seriously right there?]

That’s. lucky

Weirder and Wei-rder

Hey isn’t your personality over-written?

By the chip?

Aight

S-eriously?

Still Here?

On- alert-?

Coin- cidence? !

Augh

Is that’s seriously the alert?

Several minutes-

No wonder those guys were so late...

...

Sense De- Cep Tion

Po- S-ing As A Jedi.

Okay now Yoda’s just reading the death report

Jo-casta

What?

But that’s actually a good idea - If shits about to go down you might as well find the person who might hold them accountable instead of letting you get the shit beat out

Run-

Serious-ly shouldn’t she just shout out her name?

[Like I know - High Alert- But Ahsoka isn’t going to be much use against a Adult... Either way Might as well find her [and scare off the intruder-]

Also how come “innocence” doesn’t get the same notification

Did they forget his wristwatch?

[Like- seems important-]

Who are you?

Dang It?

You were supposed to report back!

Also no one heard any of this before

Also; are you going to tell me that AHSOKA, the child soldier, Is going to beat this guy When the fully trained elderly Jedi got her ass kicked?

Nah.. .

“You,”

Dead

Tally Of How Many Times Ahsoka- Is Adult -ify Ied- 4/5

-Un-orthodox show of initiative 1x

-Counter 1x

- Surviving this 1x

(4x)

Getting her on the run!

Tot; 7/8

-Surviv-ing;

- 1x - 1x

-1x

-1x -1x

-1x

-2x (I’m tired of counting them one by one-)

-2x

- 2x

Okay

Whelp

Aight

-Right

Shape

-Skill

-Ew

Whelp

Okay-

Where did your get your skills from?

Abomination?

Aw-

Todo-

-Yet

What-ever

Butler

Tech

Neither of which have anything to do with ironing doors open ....

.... There he goes

Sy-mpathesize- more with him than this douche bag even if his turn does make a little sense

Aight.

Whelp

Finally found that vent.. .

Right

No, he wasn’t

“Comms,”

Not Holo- Cron

.....

Completely un-realistically

Tally Of How Many Times Ahsoka- Is Adult -ify Ied- 28/29 And 1/2

(1/2 because referring to the action what respectively doesn’t count as a whole- sin- It does deserve note that you decided to repeat your bad writing-)

Jedi

She Says-

(Un Be Li Ev Able)

Holo -cron

Jedi To Open It ..

Okay,

Up- To-

Again, with the communication center-!

Dude, just wanted a Holo-cron

(Seriously that was very tortured logic, Think the writers; just wrote this scene Then realize but wait “why are they in the Holocron/ Comm Cent,?”

And that’s how Anakin/Obi-Wan Obsession with the com center began...

[sorry but there was no reason for them to be in the Com center!

That I’ve heard!]

Aight, What? What -ever

... ..

Wrong-

Yes

Com- Center-

Ser-iously even he doesn’t know what’s up

You heard me

And my stupid plan

To send you to the Coms center to justify Obi-wan’s obsession-

Craw- ling

And we have no reason to-o

Why?

Now!

Yelling- doesn’t mistake the clear lack of reason

What- ever-

Right

That’s one way to do it

Really

Also, how does -that not-

That was less than one minute

Also, but no one else will hear that but these two . .

And they’ll still progress to the comm center ...

“It came from the com center,!”

How!?

You, guys,

Comms, Archives,

Aight, Nice

Com-munication center-

Ha- ha- ha- (I’m sorry but that has come back around to kinda funny,”

[something Happens across the galaxy]

Obi-won; It was the com’s center

—-

Aight, right,

...

O-kay

...

How??

Where?

Okay ...

Cloak Ing?

What?

[you can’t defy the rules of logic that much (Physics) You need to explain where he went otherwise it’s a loony tune Of sus- pen sion-

Okay?

What??

I thought- the thing-

....

O-kay

right

Take it,

Which ,One

That-

Right

What- Ever-

Aight-

He knews

What- Ever

Don’t call your eggs

Move

Restraint

Whelp

Use-less

Just There

Whelp

Nope-

Okay-

He Try

[Hey guys,]

Off That’s some assumed authority over familiarity..

Aight..

Okay,

They’re really letting him get away with the story

Tries-

What?!

-When-

Bomb-

Both-

[Also Mace Windu is still the only semi-efficient Jedi...

Asshole !

(Can’t make the text bigger enough to display my outrage!)

[they played that off as humor!]

That was a scream of death!

Of Murder!

[if that was a sentient- And my God it seemed damn close! Dude was just murdered

The surprise- “ I didn’t see it coming, h onestly not his fault kind!”

One that would call for immediate robotic vengeance!

* im-mediate ac-countability

If sentient,

What the Hell?!

That-

Horror - fy- Ing-

Oof

“Was it sentient? Crud, I might lose my least toxic credentials

( )

Whelp

How?

No Way-

A-ight

Shit

-shit

- she did nothing

I-

Call Sec-

Whose that?

Whelp

Okay..

That Who

Dys- functional family road trip - War

No shit

Oh wait at the comment table was by all the other Jedi

So...

the whole time Obi-wan was just complaining he didn’t want to do the job

Skywalker agreeing with him...

And... wanting to ditch their post

In chara,

Just, a little bit funny when you think about it

Right,

You bought them all the way here?

...

Also look isn’t the unchild-like abomination adorable when she’s talking about punishing people more severely

Holo-cron

The heck is a holocron...

Wait-

What-

Why-

How-

Why is this being allowed to happen? -

...

Snitch

[like seriously how is it helping her case, whatsoever?

Plea Bar-gin

Aight,

Okay

That was just a completely random target on his list...

- -

The one accountable adult

Keeper Kydra Crystal-

- Holocrons

Data

You get out of here youngling

Force Sensitive Child ?

Are we really going to get into the powers eugenics? (Or power genetic superiority)

Also would it be a kin to basically every child or just any child destined for leader ship

(Like gen leader ship?)

Cause..

Also, yeah good idea keeping that around

And you named...

...

Young’lings

Future

Oy! You put that back where, it came from so help me

Future

vision

is cheating

In reality, if you did have that power, you should keep your mouth shut

And it completely negates the point of a choice based universe

(Takes all the risk out of it)

Making the story completely useless

(For the sake of tension I’m going to ignore that..)

Going on the assumption...

That’s the Jedi are just a bunch of narcs

Who like claiming they know the future

When in reality only the future knows the future...

Worn. Them

Oh so it’s just School roll call...

Contact

You must

Ya no dude’s already a headstart...

Ahsoka

Dude, he just override the punishment

Does he have the authority to do that?

[I don’t think so]

Cad bane

He probably isn’t

And you already know him From the previous episode

Good for Obi-won

Aight

Mace Windu don’t give a fuck

Kid Fisto disappeared

And. . Luminara(?)

Went to go get a snack.... ?

I don’t know

Yoda

Got Overruled

Aight, Okay

.....

This episode...

Makes me feel disgusting Watching The middle At least

It’s very clearly boomer bait...

The beginning...

Focus-ing on the importance of taking orders (With no sarcasm to my understanding,)

Progressing, Into,

Dah, de, dah, Generation ____ doesn’t understand books!

*We might if they got out of our way, let us do our thing, dis-covered and pract-iced excess, on our volition

*if we wanted to

Honestly convinced. I should’ve given them a strike right there

Out of

Malicious

Won’t (Out of restraint)

But a thought none- the-

less

Being a (toxic) Boomers Fantasy in which they, the all powerful all knowing adults must help poor Ig- nor -ant (Child)-

(I’m sorry this really disgusts me)

-with enough initiative To praise their Brilliance

(It’s re-ally di-sgusting)

This isn’t seen as an overreach Or con- Des-cion Of A Gen

And gives no in-dication it recognizes how creepy what it’s doing is

Apart from the lighting in the council room

*Which I’m now convinced is permanently broken

And continues with the assum-ption of a life-time Over the future

Breaking; the story pretty thoroughly

And announcing the return to mediocrity...

(Border -ing on attempt at lower standards)

(Also they playoff the death of a semi-sentient species For Humor?

He died screaming!

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canyouhearthelight · 5 years

Text

The Miys, Ch. 52

Happy Tuesday, everyone! We have a pretty fun chapter today, so I hope you all enjoy it.

Also, we have another cameo from a character who was submitted to the character contest. @dierotenixe, I hope you like it!

Speaking of, I am currently at 408 followers, which is mindblowing. I love you all and I appreciate every note I get on these chapters, especially the comments and reblogs. You each keep me going every single day with this story.

Alistair showed up, not bright-eyed but at least early the next morning to discuss the results of the festival. I was barely out of bed, stifling a yawn as I greeted him at the door and shooed him inside. Not having been allowed entry on the one occasion he had previously ventured to my quarters, he glanced around as though cataloguing the contents. A snore erupting from the bedroom sent his attention whipping that direction with wide eyes.

“Coffee?” I offered calmly, refusing to be embarrassed or laugh at his incredulity.

“You allowed me inside your quarters while a gentleman caller is still here?” he hissed in reply. I took that as a yes and staggered toward the kitchen. “That is incredibly uncouth, Sophia. I expected better of you, at least.”

“Not a caller,” I yawned again, handing him a steaming mug. “They live here, and they don’t have to be on duty for another two hours. Figured I’d let them sleep in. It’s been a very eventful few days, they deserve it.”

He scowled at me in disdain. “You could have simply asked me to come back at another time.”

I waved his objections off, gesturing toward the armchair. “It’s fine, I swear. I would have still been in my pajamas, and GK and Lyric would have been here, most likely. They usually swing by for a few hours if I’m going to be home alone all day.”

A particularly loud snore prompted a sleep-husked objection and a grunt before the snores got much quieter. I ignored the eyebrows that threatened to leave Alistair’s face in favor of the ceiling and flicked open my data pad instead. “How did the numbers from yesterday look?”

“What? Seriously? You really expect me to just ignore – “

“Alistair,” I interrupted sternly. “I told you I would be in my quarters, working, for the next several days. I don’t know what you expected, but you probably won’t find it. I’m staying home so I can recover from handling the festival, which means I’m not getting primped for work, my partners will likely be here, and yes, one snores.”

“Partners? Plural?” he nearly shouted, redder than embarrassment could account for.

“Oh, bloody hell, you posh wanker,” Conor’s voice bellowed from the bedroom. “Some of us are sleeping! Either pipe down, or feck off! Jesus…”

Instead of the reaction I expected, my assistant was immediately mollified. “Ah, well then. Messers. MacMaoilir and Okima, I’m guessing?”

I quirked an eyebrow curiously. “Does it really matter?”

“I believe it quite matters.” He actually sounded offended. “Those two are clearly smitten with you, and good men, besides. I was worried you had some other dunderheads here.”

“You do realize it could have been a woman?”

“If a woman snored like that, I would have much graver concerns about you and your taste in partners, I assure you. Such as a female what? A warthog, perhaps? While we may no longer be on Earth, I do believe that is still illegal. Or at the very least should be.”

“Well, then. Now that I have Uncle Alistair’s approval…”

“Bite your tongue.”

“Can we please work, now?” I begged wearily.

Getting down to business, Alistair provided a summary of the data he had spent the previous day reviewing. Mostly, it confirmed the early reports: Overall, the festival had been a rousing success with minimal complaints reported. The low-stimulation session was viewed highly favorably, with a note to include it in future events, accompanied by requests from those who had been able to attend a ship-wide social event for the first time.

Tyche’s suspicion about natto was partially confirmed, as well. “Can you please explain to me why the food festival as resulted in a sudden increase in rotten soybeans from the food consoles?” Alistair asked, drily.

I shook my head and held up my hands. “For starters, they’re fermented, not rotten. Second, please tell me it is not programmed in the consoles under that term?” I shut my eyes and mentally crossed my fingers in vain hope.

“Of course not,” he scoffed, prompting a whoosh of breath from me. “However, I was curious what dish was so popular, so I searched the database from Earth.”

“I think it ended up being the single most-popular dish we could track,” I admitted. “But it’s still decidedly not rotten.” I always tried to be impartial to foods I didn’t like, and I was trying the hardest I could remember with what was decidedly my least favorite food.

“Fine. Controlled rot.”

I sighed and pinched my nose. “Lots of foods are fermented, Mr. Worthington, including several I am sure you quite enjoy.”

“Alcohol is not a food, Miss Reid.”

“Bread. Cheese. Sour cream. Yogurt,” I ticked off on my fingers. “Miso. Fish sauces. Kimchi. Just about any hot sauces or anything with vinegar…” I glanced at him pointedly.

“Bread is not fermented,” he grumbled.

Behind us, a sleepy voice interjected. “Leavened bread is, especially sourdough.” I turned to see Maverick scratching his bare chest and stretching, his hair sticking out at angles from sleep. “Was the natto really popular enough to make it into a report?” Without asking, he gathered our coffee mugs and shuffled off to the kitchen to refill them. When he returned, he had one for himself. “Besides, you left out pickles.” He dropped a kiss on top of my head before collapsing on the couch next to me.

“It was either that popular, or that disgusting,” Alistair confirmed before taking a grateful sip of hot caffeinated heaven. “Either way, people are requesting enough that poor Noah has asked if we need their services to augment the atmospheric scrubbers.”

“People could be using it for pranks,” Maverick warned as he slung an arm around my shoulders. “Granted, some people probably actually like it, but still.”

I wrinkled my nose and thought for a minute. “If that’s the case, I’ll suggest to Xiomara that we check the sensors to identify who did it and make them eat the stuff. Not a fresh server of it, the actual server they used for the prank.”

“She would never agree to it,” Alistair warned.

“Au contraire,” I smirked. “She likes the taste but hates the smell. And the medbay can fix food poisoning. To her, it would be a very solid case of the punishment fitting the crime.”

Hands flung in the air with exasperation, my assistant surrendered. “If you get that policy passed by the Council, I will…” He thought for a moment. “I will learn to swim.”

“From the mermaid,” I insisted, inciting a yelp from Maverick. How Conor was still asleep, I had no idea.

“Fine. From the mermaid,” Alistair agreed, sticking his hand to shake.

Laughing, I shook my head and took it. Maverick shook me slightly. “What mermaid? I thought mermaids were made-up. Please tell me they’re real. I wanna see one.”

“Kinda real?” I hedged, glancing at him. “Nixe is the beginners’ diving and swimming instructor. I don’t know what happened to her before coming on the ship, but her file shows she suffered an incredibly significant brain trauma. Like, she should be dead kind of serious. Our best guess is that she was a professional mermaid performer at some point, because she has an amazingly detailed memory of a life that didn’t exist and a swimming tail that ended up being some of the most expensive nanotech anyone on the ship has ever touched, let alone seen. Even Noah was somewhat impressed by it.”

“That’s sad but kinda cool,” Maverick admitted, only slightly disappointed.

Alistair scoffed before ending up on the receiving end of my best death-glare. “And she’s nice and patient,” I asserted, somewhat angrily.

“She’s barmy,” he argued.

“And I don’t care,” I ground out. “She is on this ship, so she needed a task. Teaching swimming makes her feel useful, and she is incredibly. Good. At. It. Grey and Noah cleared her psych eval – she’s no crazier than anyone else on this ship. And anyone who can swim in over forty pounds of gold gets an automatic lifeguard certification from anyone on this ship who can swim. Believe me, I ask frequently.”

Alistair opened his mouth to respond, but discovered one of the virtues of having a conversation that included Maverick. “Wait – how much weight? And gold?” my partner asked, astonished.

“Forty pounds,” I confirmed. “They’re actually diving weights, but tests show they really are solid gold. And they could be made of paper for all that they slow her down.”

“She could at least have her memories restored,” Alistair begged, trying to get me to see his version of reason. Before I could snap a response, Alistair’s gaze snapped up over my shoulder on the opposite side from Maverick. Apparently Conor hadn’t been able to sleep through our argument.

“They can’t be restored,” he stated, quietly but factually. “Asked Grey about it once, Charly did. The brain tissue was regrown, but without an exact scan of her brain – down to the molecules – those memories are gone.”

“But Miss Reid has her full memories from before she was attacked,” the argument came.

“Cause our brains are scanned every sixty seconds we are on board,” was the response. “Only exception is when we’re asleep or bathing.” Maverick squeezed my shoulder at hearing this, before grabbing Conor’s hand to reassure him. It was still, and probably would always be, a sensitive topic. “On top of that, we are constantly being healed of minor ailments and even aging.”

That was news, even to me. I chanced a crick in my neck to look up at him. “Why aging?”

He stared down at me, pointedly. When I still did not understand, Alistair gasped softly. “Children,” he nearly whispered. “So there are people who can carry and raise children.”

I swore under my breath at my stupidity. “Of course,” I groaned. “With the exception of Derek, everyone on board is old enough that we would be largely middle-age by the time we reached the colony. Hell, a lot of us already are.” I tapped my knuckles on my lips, brain firing on all six processors to calculate the impacts. Absentmindedly, I handed Conor my coffee and ignored Alistair’s curious glance as I heard it gulped down before footsteps headed to refill it. “Do we know how much of the aging is being ‘healed’? Are we staying at the age we were when we came on board, or are we getting younger?”

“I’m not sure,” Conor admitted as he walked back in and returned my mug, shoving me and Maverick over so he could sit in his usual spot. “Noah?” he called out. He didn’t ask the question on our minds, as we were all aware that Noah was listening to everything in my quarters.

“Good Morning, Conor,” was the reply. “To answer your implied question, any environmental factors that cause humans to grow old are consistently being repaired, along with damage due to cellular senescence.”

“How?” I asked. I was absolutely floored. Human…. Terran scientists had been trying to figure that out since recorded history.

“Food and drink additives to limit telomere shortening, along with therapeutic chemicals in the bathing system,” was the slightly chagrined reply. “Everyone brought on the ship was treated for progerial genetics and non-superficial environmental damage that would lead to premature aging.”

“Are we getting younger?” Maverick whispered. Given his childhood and mine, I couldn’t blame him for the fear in his voice, and squeezed him back just as hard as he grasped me.

“Only marginally,” Miys clarified. “By the time we reach the colony planet, only five Terran revolutions of aging should be reversed from when we left your planet.”

To my surprise, Maverick looked horrified. “Noah. Does that apply to every person on the Ark?”

“Only those who are outside of their maturing period.”

“So, not any humans who were under the age of twenty…five?” Alistair ventured suspiciously, seeming to pick up on what Maverick was suggesting.

“No, Administrator Worthington. Only humans whose aging exceeded the equivalent of thirty Terran revolutions of standard aging are provided telometric and progerial treatments.”

“Thank you, Noah,” Maverick sighed, running his free hand through his hair and nodding at my assistant. “And thank you.” To myself and and Conor, he clarified. “Derek is only seventeen. Sam is not even thirty, and Zach is twenty-six. It wouldn’t be fair for them to barely get out of puberty – or in Derek’s case, stare down the end of it – and have to go back. Can you imagine?”

<< Prev Masterlist Next >>

#the miys #original fiction #humans are weird #humans are space orcs #science fiction #aliens #found family #mental health

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themuhlenbergweekly · 4 years

Text

Everything is good and regular

By Jessica Bensimhon Layout Editor

How is everybody? Good, I hope. Normal and good — just like me! I’ve been cooped up alone in my childhood bedroom for nearly three weeks straight, which is where all the most normal and good people are forged: in the flames of resounding solitude. Not many people know this, but isolating yourself completely is very important if you want to be as good and as normal as me. In fact, I think it might be the most important thing you can do.

That being said, I’m supposed to write an article today. But I just don’t know what to write about, because everything has just been so so good and excellent — and not only that, but regular, too. Art feeds on suffering! Good writing is about bad, weird things! And there is simply nothing bad or weird happening now that springs to mind.

Believe me, I searched high and low for something to write about today. I looked deep inside myself to see if there was anything at all. But I might have looked too deep inside myself, because I think something looked back? Something dark and unknowable, with glinting eyes and an earthen musk? Anyway, there was nothing interesting there to report.

I got so desperate that I started to ask around. And since there were no human people around to ask, I opened my jar of sourdough starter (which is something I have now) and peered in with my big round face. I asked, “Cathleen ni Glutenhan, what do you think I should write about today?” I was sure Cathleen would have a brilliant idea, because she is a colony of an inestimable number of cultured yeasts, and a million little heads are probably better than one! But she only gurgled back.

I went outside and took a deep breath of mountain air. I heard a passing train rumble down in the valley. I looked up up up into the trees. There, tucked up in the bare branches was a committee of vultures — a group of vultures is called a committee, I just learned. I recognized them from being the vultures that always circle my house, and sometimes me when I leave my house to get the mail. I like to think of them as friends. I don’t know what they like to think of me.

I asked, “Committee of vultures, what should I write about?” One of them peered down at me and bellowed, “Actually, we are in a very important Zoom meeting right now and would prefer if you would ask almost anyone else.” That’s when I realized they were all wearing little headsets and looking at themselves in the webcams of their Chromebooks.

“Okay, thanks anyway,” I said dejectedly, and stared down down down into the valley at the rumbling train. I asked, “Train in the valley, what should I write?” It rumbled low and distant in reply.

It got so late, and I got so tired and defeated that all I could do was crawl into bed. So I did, and I pulled the blankets up up up over my head. Then I heard a knock at my window, which was especially strange since my room is on the second floor. I went to the window and pulled back the curtains and it was Robert Pattinson!

“Robert Pattinson, what are you doing here?” I asked.

“I read your article in the Weekly about me,” he said, crouched on my roof in the gloaming like a gaunt, pasty frog, “so I came here as fast as I could.” Seriously, he was so pale he glowed a little. Effervescent.

“Well,” I said, “since you’ve come all this way, Robert Pattinson, I guess I have to let you in,” and so I opened the window and he hopped scrawnily through.

He was wearing a smoking jacket and shrouded in mists. Our conversation was lit by the light of an oil lamp, which he had been carrying because it was night. I poured him a cup of chamomile tea with milk, then I poured one for myself. Obviously, we sat six feet apart.

“Robert Pattinson, what do you think I should write about?” I asked. “I mean, is anything even going on right now? Like, in the world?”

“I don’t know,” he said, holding his cup and furrowing his brow. “Maybe you could write about me again.”

“No, that would be silly. Besides — and I hope this doesn’t hurt your feelings — but I’m not sure you’re as relevant as you were in November. Who is Twitter’s White Boy of the Month this month?”

“I think it’s Andrew Cuomo.”

“Wait, seriously? Wait, wait, wait. Seriously?”

“Listen, lassie,” he said irritably (wait, is Robert Pattinson Irish? he is, right?). “Are you just going to talk about your writer’s block all night? I have problems, too, you know. Much bigger and more important problems than yours. I have to play a man in a movie who is a bat. I don’t even know what a bat looks like or does. And I’m on a no-liquids diet, and you’ve given me this fecking milked tea!”

“Those are some problems,” I sympathized. “Can you tell me about them some more, so that I may write about them?”

Robert Pattinson huffed and stormed out of my window, taking his lamp and his mists and his full teacup with him. I looked despondently out after him — but did not follow — until he was just a bright spot on the horizon in the dark.

I still did not know what to write.

I crawled back into bed, and soon began to feel good and normal again, just like I did before. It was pleasant, exceptionally so, to feel so normal and be so good. I didn’t even want to write anymore.

Maybe that’s it, I thought as I drifted off to sleep — but my arms were so heavy I couldn’t reach for a pen to jot the thought down. Maybe when things are so normal and good, the best thing to write is nothing at all.

#oped

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c2bend · 8 years

Text

Emerald City Comic-Con 2017

So I drove to Seattle from my little city Bend, OR on Thursday, about a 7hr drive there (7.5 hrs on the way home :/) I stayed with @ninaf who lives just outside of Seattle. We hung out that night and didn’t go to bed until after 1 a.m. 😳The Panel: Our plan was to get to the Convention Center by 8:30/9:00 a.m. which we did. It was interesting that there didn’t seem to be much ‘security’(I could have taken my flask :/), we entered from across the street where we parked in a public parking garage and entered in at the 3rd floor. We probably could have gotten in Sat. no problem even without a Sat badge! Anyhow quickly found the line for the Outlander panel – SO many people! They let us in at about 10:45 and me @ninaf and 2 of her friends (that are 'normal’ fans) found some seats – we were second row far left of the stage – right where the fan questions were left of the stage. I wanted to ask a question – Sam could you please sit back I can’t see CAITRIONA!? In front of us was a slew of moms with their babies – so cute – one started fussing and Cait actually looked over to them with her awe concerned face – she clearly LOVES BABIES! ♥ You can just see it in the video briefly at about 14:32 min. I am a huge Cait fan so I was Screaming and standing when she came out and thought we were doing pretty good there, then Sam came out and omg decibels! They sit down and Sam won’t sit all the way back on the couch, I don’t know why, and he was blocking my view of Cait, I could only see her on the screen or if she moved forward or back. 😒 I didn’t take any pics, cos I just wanted to be present and absorb the experience, (one of @ninaf ’s friends did though so we’ll post as soon as we get them). One observance is they both looked tired, but ready to 'do this’. I loved the panel, I thought they were very comfortable, there to have fun and engage with us, I liked the questions asked and quite a few of mine were answered. Caitriona was taking the lead quite a bit but I think her wit is a bit quicker than Sam’s (I’m a taurus and we tend to slow think sometimes) but it gave him a chance to play off of her which I feel they do quite a bit probably. They seemed very in tune with each other. Next on the agenda was the autograph session. We got there @ about 12:15 for the 12:30 and were turned away- too full come back at 4. Well cool, we can at least eat, since we didn’t have any breakfast so we had lunch and drinks. Met up with @ourrubygirl and her daughter (normal fan), nipunad on twitter – sorry don’t know your tumblr and with ninaf and her 2 friends (side note – they were so funny before I even got to Seattle they were concerned that ninaf would invite someone from online who she had never met to stay at her house. By then we had talked on the phone and friended each other on facebook so they had to facebook stalk me to give their approval – whew, glad I passed). 😘Photo Op! Ugh, okay this is where we realized that this poor little comic-con was absolutely NOT ready for this Outlander fandom and where everything really started to get behind schedule. I envy the Sat photo op participants, looks like it was more relaxed and not as rushed as Friday's– READY click NEXT! I know people have been dissing the posed photos, but after being 'there’ this is what I feel, I think SamCait enjoy the poses somewhat, cos’ otherwise the way it was with many of us on Friday we just walk in, stand next to them, click and we’re out, so I could see that for sure getting tedious AF for them, they seemed to have more fun on Sat with it – because they were allowed to also. Anyhow the Friday photo op was close to being a complete clusterfuck, but the gestapo staff pulled it off. There were other people there, apparently there was more than just OL there 😉 that would be like “What is this line for with all these people?” And we’d be like Outlander, and they just go off mumbling wtf is outlander? Funny. I walked in for my 'Team Outlander’ photo and I was wearing opal earrings from Mexico and Cait says to me “oh I love your earrings” Me: thank you – and I’m beaming so fucking hard I can hardly breath! So I’m 5'1” - yeah – I’m holding on to them for the photo mumble thanks or something I fecking don’t remember, patted Sam’s back turned and looked up OMFG this guy is TALL! I have a friend that is 6'7”, but Sam seemed much taller than that, I think it’s his massiveness or something IDK. His leather jacket is really soft btw.Okay NEXT – while I go back in line for my Cait only photo, ninaf goes downstairs to get in line for the autographs – good thing too since they almost turned me away by the time I got down there! STEP OFF BITCH I WILL GET MY CATRIONA EFFING BALFE AUTOGRAPH!!!! So by this time we are beyond hot – it was so hot in this place which wasn’t even at the convention center, everything but the panel was at the Sheraton next door. Note to self Bring water bottle, we learned a lot of should'ves…. So there was quite a wait for this, mainly because Caitriona was still upstairs READY click NEXT! And they could only do the Sam only autographs which there weren’t a ton of apparently😁

The way they had it set up Cait first then Sam, so we had to wait for Cait to appear. We were in the 'overflow’ line outside of the main autograph room, but could see in there a bit, we saw the lights go out, didn’t hear the comments @sileas84 mentioned, but too funny. When we finally got to the 'room’ wow, so I am a diehard Caitriona Balfe fan, I like Sam but am not an over the top fan like most… I have to say seeing him up close and personal I COULD NOT take my eyes off of him, he was so 'cute’ doesn’t do it justice, I seriously have no word/s for it. He was so funny and gracious and flirty with the women and NICE, very tan too, yeah, I kept running into people as the line snaked around trying to just watch him, I even almost got kicked out trying to sneak a pic – damn gestapo staffers. So finally get up to Caitriona, um effing goddess. She had quite the stash of gifts, I had considered giving them something but didn’t want to burden them with too much stuff and if they truly just give it away well… So I opted to give her a love letter as I call it, from me. I didn’t know what to 'say or ask her something’ so I mentioned that I have a head shot autograph of Simon (her friend Simon Kassianides) and I can add hers to it now and she smiles and says “oh cool, I just saw him a couple of days ago!” Me: heehee. JHRC I’m such a dweeb. I didn’t get a Sam autograph cos’ they had sold out by the time I got online to purchase, I coached ninaf though to make sure to smell him so we could report back, since we both forgot to at the photo op :P So we float out of the room and out into the main area and I finally just started screaming I was so excited – I got to talk to Caitriona Effing Balfe (even if it was brief) I am so so glad I did this!

After this was all done it was getting close to our dinner plans for meeting up with other tumblrs, so we eventually got to the restaurant. How fun to finally meet some of us. As we came into the room I immediately recognized @rainmanjdog and @mommydog67, we had been chatting while in line for our Cait only photo and didn’t know that we were part of the tumblrs, so funny and we all almost asked each other but didn’t want to risk it – so sad. Great night hanging with everyone, best story goes to @valkyrie1969 I still chuckle just thinking about it. So where is the photo of us pointing at the 'Meet and Greet’ room @pentwhistle ?

Overall impression of SamCait – they are two of the most genuine, engaging, fun, cool, nicest people.

Overall impresion of our tumblrs – we are some of the most genuine, engaging, fun, cool and nicest people.

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preserving-ferretbrain · 5 years

Text

Going Bullshit

by Robinson L

Monday, 17 March 2014Robinson L tears into Libba Bray's Going Bovine and makes several unflattering comparisons to the works of Melina Marchetta, Catherine Fisher, and Douglas Adams~

One of the accolades Melina Marchetta's On the Jellicoe Road received on publication was the Michael L. Printz Award for excellence in Young Adult literature. That was for 2009. In 2010, the award went to a book entitled Going Bovine by Libba Bray. After reading Going Bovine, I can only conclude that 2010 was an exceptionally dry year for Young Adult fiction.

The book starts out promisingly, with our protagonist, Cameron Smith, narrating a near-death experience he had at Disneyland when he was five years old. Bray's writing is evocative, and she really nails the fuzzy, almost dreamlike logic with which a five-year-old views the world.

Then we snap to the present, twelve years later, and things go downhill fast. Cameron is now seventeen years old, a jerk, and a loser. Taylor Markham of

On the Jellicoe Road

can be an asshole as well, but she’s always dynamic and interesting—whereas Cameron Smith is the kind of jerk you just want to slap about the face until he gets over himself already.

It takes an irritatingly long time to get there, but things finally pick up when Cameron gets diagnosed with Cruetzfeldt-Jakob (“mad cow”) disease, which will kill him in a matter of weeks. An angel with a punk aesthetic named Dulcie visits Cameron in the hospital and kicks off the novel's plot, which is that a mad scientist named Doctor X has opened a dimensional hole which threatens to destroy the universe, and it's up to Cameron to find him and convince him to close it again. Oh, and Cameron's mad cow disease is actually a byproduct of this dimensional hole, and Doctor X is the only person in the universe who has the cure.

Okay, a quest to save the world/universe/multiverse from complete destruction is cool and all, but in context it jars with everything that's gone before—there's been plenty of supernatural build-up to Dulcie's arrival, but all very magic realist and with a certain amount of ambiguity as to whether Cameron is just suffering from hallucinations due to his Cruetzfeldt-Jakob. Leaping from there straight into a madcap caper to find the one man who can avert the end of the universe as we know it makes the book feel more than anything like a bad 80s Doctor Who story than anything else, except even more incongruous because at least in Doctor Who you kind of expect the fate of the world to be at stake sooner or later.

Anyway, Dulcie gives Cameron a sort of wristwatch which will hold his illness at bay, and sends him off on his grand quest along with his new friend and sidekick Gonzo, a hypochondriac dwarf Chicano whom we eventually learn is also gay. Despite Bray playing Minority Bingo, I didn't detect anything terribly problematic with Gonzo's depiction—which isn't the same as saying that there's nothing problematic there—though I did notice his tendency as a Latino to,

as our friends at Unskippable put it

, slip into Spanish every other word. They later form a trio with the Norse God Balder, who has been trapped in the body of a lawn gnome (it's a surreal book). Balder is easily the best character in the story, so of course he dies toward the end in an event which was transparently foreshadowed early on when he randomly initiates a discussion of Viking Funerals.

Prompted by Dulcie, they set off on a series of bizarre real-world adventures with supernatural overtones which vary in quality from kind of cool to teeth-gratingly bad. My problem here is that for the most part, Cameron has no real plan: he has to find Doctor X, but he has no strategy for doing so, nor does he really develop one over the course of the story. Throughout the novel, Cameron and company just stumble barse-ackwards into one misadventure after another. Now if at some point he decided that he's better off just going with the flow and adopted that as a strategy, it could be kind of cool, and totally in keeping with the unplanned, structureless feel to the plot. Instead, while Cameron can be reasonably proactive when it comes to addressing the problems of a given situation, he's almost entirely reactive when it comes to moving the overall plot forward, as if his player is so profoundly uninterested in the main plot that he has to be constantly railroaded through it by the Author-GM. For the reader, the effect is less of an inexorably and inevitably unfolding series of events than a slightly disjointed bunch of interesting incidents inexpertly welded together.

Even if Cameron were more of a proactive character though, we'd still be a far cry from

Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency

. In the “Dirk Gently” books, Douglas Adams was able to make bizarre coincidences feel like part of some grand, cosmic pattern which all fits together in an overarching harmony. In

Going Bovine

, Libba Bray's use of bizarre coincidences feels more like a lazy plot device to move the story along. The coincidences get a kind of explanation later on though, as we'll see.

Another problem is that it feels very much as though Bray never actually settled what tone she wanted to strike with the book, the upshot in this case being that much of the stuff that happens in

Going Bovine

is too grounded in reality to write off as parody or farce, yet too silly and over-the-top to take seriously.

One of the biggest offenders in this regard is Bray's occasional dips into social commentary—which might actually have been a good thing if someone had only come along in the revision process and persuaded her to step away from the bloody Themehammer. As it is, Cameron's school, where the teachers tell the students just to concentrate on the test material and not bother trying to learn the subject, represents the book's zenith of subtle and believable discourse. Pretty extreme, but sadly plausible.

Then there's Cameron's encounter with a therapist after his first major fit, and before everybody learns about his Cruetzfeldt-Jakob. School officials suspect drug use, and send him to a counselor—she asks him one question: “are you on drugs?” and when he tells her (truthfully) “no,” she proceeds to take up the rest of the hour reminiscing about bad trips she had when she was younger; at the end of which she tells him she thinks they made a lot of progress in that session, admonishes him not to take drugs, and refers him to a specialist. I find the lack of professionalism at work in this scene appalling—granted, that's sort of the point, but apparently, the only way Bray could think of to depict the problems of the psychiatric profession is by creating a cartoon caricature who is ignorant of the most basic, fundamental rule of counseling (i.e. that you

listen

to your patient). I've no doubt such people are out there, and some of them might just have licenses to practice—but Bray is sadly mistaken if she thinks pointing out the extreme wing-nuts of a profession makes any sort of point about the general practice.

The specialist she refers Cameron to examines him like an actual fecking professional and gives him a prescription for antidepressants, prompting Cameron to narrate ironically that he went to a therapist who didn't listen to him and told him to stay off drugs and then referred him to a health specialist who did listen to him and who put him on drugs. I found that observation quite funny, and there's actually a great point buried in there, but paired with the Nation's Worst Ever Therapist it loses most of its edge.

And then there's the most painful sequence of the book: Cameron's misadventures with the Church of Everlasting Satisfaction and Snack-'N'-Bowl (CESSNAB). Despite its name, CESSNAB gives no signs of being a religious or spiritual organization: it's more of a secular commune for spoiled, self-indulgent, privileged twenty-somethings to indulge a doctrine so goofy, UFO cults probably laugh at it behind its back. The doctrine is basically: “Be happy, and everything will be all right, and you can do anything you put your mind to,” along with the removal from people's lives of anything which is construed as threatening to make them unhappy, per their slogan which makes me cringe whenever I think about it: “Don't hurt your happiness.” (I think just typing that relieved me of two or three braincells.) So basically, a community with utopian aspirations that's actually a tightly-controlled dystopia, but so blatant that even an utter fool could see through it in nothing flat.

It wouldn't be so bad, except that Cameron is not only an utter fool, but a complete idiot on top of that, and falls for CESSNAB's transparent bullshit hook, line, and sinker. This subjects the reader to pages and pages of Bray wringing out a line of discourse which was obvious to anyone with anything approaching what we would call sapience the moment CESSNAB trotted out their philosophy, culminating in this spectacular piece of dialogue spoken to Cameron by a sort-of revolutionary just before she brings the whole organization crashing down:

“What if those so-called 'negative feelings' are useful?”

My tiny mind is fecking blown.

Seriously, Bray? The book is aimed at older teens, and this particular piece of discourse would be patronizing to ten-year-olds. Offhand, I can't think of the last time I've encountered a book which has so completely insulted my intelligence.

This is the most egregious incident, but it isn't the last one. Later on, Cameron encounters a Wishing Tree, which Dulcie explains really works, but it gives you what you want in your heart, rather than what you literally asked for. This strikes me as a stupendously sensible way to have a wishing machine operate; whereas Cameron complains that it ought to grant wishes literally. Dude, have you never read

The Monkey's Paw

? All right, fair enough, neither have I, but have you never encountered the

concept

of “be careful what you wish for”? Just how big of a rock have you been living under your whole life?

As in the previous incident, Bray situates Cameron in the position of Reader Surrogate so that the more knowledgeable character is not only lecturing him about the frickin' obvious, she's lecturing me. If Bray wants her protagonist to be a dumbass, that's totally legit, but treating the reader like a dumbass along with him—uh-uh.

While the sheer idiocy of the CESSNAB sequence and the general condescension are deplorable, it's the ending which ultimately sinks

Going Bovine

. Cameron tracks down Doctor X, who refuses to help him save the universe because of his generically tragic backstory, and so much for that plot thread. Before Cameron can try something else, his time runs out on his disease and he's confronted by the story's villain, the Wizard of Reckoning (which, as villain names go, is pretty friggin' awesome). After the Wizard drops a bombshell which I will come to presently, the two embark upon an esoteric chase sequence which it will take a much smarter or more inebriated head than my own to make sense of. The chase ends with Cameron pulling out the End-Of-The-Book-Emergency-Plot-Device he picked up towards the beginning of his adventures, thus apparently banishing the Wizard of Reckoning and waking Cameron up.

… Yes, you read that right. The epic twist which the Wizard of Reckoning reveals is that Cameron's been in his hospital bed dying of Cruetzfeldt-Jakob this whole time, and all his adventures with Gonzo, Balder, and Dulcie were an elaborate hallucination cooked up by his subconscious. Now Cameron's time is up, though, and the Wizard challenges him to accept his fate and die peacefully.

[1]

The story closes with Cameron reflecting on how the hallucination gave him the chance to really experience life for the first time, and then finding Dulcie in the afterlife and hooking up with her—maybe. I'll let Dan summarize my thoughts on this conclusion: “

The only thing worse than an 'it was all a dream' ending is an 'it was all a dream … OR WAS IT?' ending

.”

Granted, this didn't come completely out of left field. It was technically foreshadowed by a couple of weird flashes Cameron has back to his sister and their parents during his adventures—though since several of these flashes show him events outside of his hospital room, they don't exactly support the interpretation that these are moments of him seeing what's “really” going on. But even if it was foreshadowed, it doesn't change the fact that at the eleventh hour, Bray snatches away the ultimate goal Cameron has been striving for throughout the bulk of the book and replaces it with—nothing, really, or at least, nothing that's at all comprehensible to non-lit majors. As anti-climaxes go, that's pretty epic.

It may be useful to compare the ending of Catherine Fisher's

Corbenic

. As with most of Fisher's work, I took a while to warm to

Corbenic

, but I enjoyed the ending, and didn't feel the least bit cheated by it, even though it could be fairly characterized as “and then I woke up and it was all a dream … OR WAS IT?” I think

Corbenic

works for a couple of reasons, none of which are applicable to

Going Bovine

. First, because the ambiguity in the former does not totally derail either of the textually supported interpretations: if you choose to believe all the magic stuff is real and Cal really has found a mystical grail which will heal the fisher king, there's plenty of interpretive space for you. Second, because the possibility that the magic is a delusion on Cal's part is not treated as an eleventh hour plot twist, but is rather a running theme throughout the book. And third, because the goal Cal has been striving for still has value even if you choose to believe he's hallucinating—you don't go through the whole book with him trying to reach a specific point, only to have that point rendered irrelevant and swept aside at the last minute.

Next to everything else, I don't greatly mind that the book has a tragic ending, but let's not kid ourselves: this isn't

On the Jellicoe Road

, where tragic elements are inextricably bound up with the beauty and power of the story. This is

Going Bovine

, the story of a young jerk who learns something of what it means to be alive, to accept the necessity of death, and then dies—it could just as easily have been the story of a young jerk who learns something of what it means to be alive, and goes on to live a nicer, happier, more meaningful life, without it making a lick of difference to the rest of the book. The tragic ending doesn't actively harm the story, but it certainly doesn't enhance it.

[2]

The book has its good points, but they're massively outweighed by the structural issues and the painful attempts at social commentary, and that's even before we factor in the ghastly ending. It still may have some value as a curiosity—many of the ideas in there strike me as pretty unique and imaginative—but in the final analysis it fails as a narrative, which is perhaps the worst failure a work of literature can commit. I suppose folks who are into surrealist adventures and don't mind “and it turned out it was all a dream … OR WAS IT?” endings may still find it worth a read, despite the condescending and ham-fisted social commentary, but to everyone else, I encourage you to do yourself a favor and don't bother.

[1]

This raises the rather glaring question of why Bray treats Cameron's defeat of the Wizard of Reckoning as such a big deal, as he then goes on to do

exactly

what the Wizard had been telling him to do anyway.

[2]

Actually, the fact that I don't strongly care whether Cameron lives or dies is pretty damning in its own right.Themes:

Books

Sci-fi / Fantasy

Young Adult / Children

Emocakes

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~Comments (

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)

Arthur B

at 18:18 on 2014-03-17Wow, that does sound messy. It feels from your review like there's a whole mess of stuff in there which might have been interesting treated in isolation but doesn't really belong all thrown together in the same pot. (In particular, "let's have wacky adventures with a magic dwarf and a garden gnome - by the way, the punchline is terminal illness" feels like a wonky premise to begin with.)

Out of interest, how long is the book in terms of page count, and how deep in do you get before the whole Doctor X deal kicks off?

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Alice

at 18:43 on 2014-03-17You know, I read this book a couple of years ago, but I'd completely forgotten everything about it except for vague memories of Dulcie and Gonzo. The little that I do remember about the book meshes pretty well with this review, though, and I certainly remember disliking it.

The worst thing about it was that -- despite all the wacky shenanigans -- I just found it really dull. And I can forgive a book many things, but I find it very hard to forgive being bored by a book, especially if I'm not getting anything else out of it.

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http://ronanwills.wordpress.com/

at 00:15 on 2014-03-18Maybe I'm just not intellectual enough, but I tend to be immediately put off by surrealist novels. Basically if the back cover blurb reads like a string of random bullshit (this book has robots! and time travel! and parallel dimensions and talking walruses named Steve who are also stock brokers and Santa Claus fighting a cyclops and) then I stay far, far away.

So this sounds like the sort of thing that would drive me absolutely batshit insane. It's not even that stories like this tend to be confusing, it's that for all their wild and wacky imagery I find them incredibly boring. I'm not entirely sure why- maybe it's just because there's so little to actually latch onto emotionally.

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Robinson L

at 22:36 on 2014-03-18@Arthur: Yep, pretty messy.

According to wikipedia, it's 496-pages long. Unfortunately, I can't tell you offhand where in that Dulcie appears and starts explaining about the Dr. X stuff, because I listened to the book on CD. I would guess it's within the first 100-125 pages, though.

Alice: I can forgive a book many things, but I find it very hard to forgive being bored by a book, especially if I'm not getting anything else out of it.

Oh, I hear you, there.

I don't think I was too bored by

Going Bovine

(it's been a while since I read it, now), though I might have been more so if I'd actually had to read it instead of listening on audio.

@ronan: Interesting perspective. Personally, I don't mind surreal so long as it's mostly coherent; if I can follow along with the characters, then I've got something to latch onto emotionally, and that will usually see me through. A lot of Douglas Adams' work, especially his "Dirk Gently" books could be described as surreal, but they're rarely esoteric, and I like them a lot.

To give Bray her due, she keeps

Going Bovine

mostly on the lefthand side of that ledger. The characters are consistent throughout, and though the events of the novel are often bizarre (again, Norse god turned into talking lawn gnome), the way the characters respond to and interact with the weird elements is plausible enough. I guess what I'm trying to say is that it felt internally consistent to me ... that is, up until final chase and confrontation with the Wizard of Reckoning, where it all fell apart.

From your example, though, I don't think not being an intellectual is the main problem ... it sounds less like "I'm going to do really smart things with metaphor and symbolism and the like" and more like "I'm going to dream up an excuse to throw all these cool ideas into the same story and not bother trying to make it work in terms of plot or character or the like."

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James D

at 19:47 on 2014-03-19Has anyone seen the movie Jacob's Ladder? It uses a similar plot device to a certain part of Going Bovine, namely that Jacob is dying the whole time and the movie is essentially a dream, except I think it works because Jacob still has a character arc, his struggles in the coma dream still matter, as they are psychological struggles, like coming to terms with the death of his son, which it is suggested was his reason for abandoning his life as a professor and becoming a postman.

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Robinson L

at 20:30 on 2014-03-19I haven't, but I'm prepared to believe that it can be done in such a way that it works.

In fact a lot of what happens in

Going Bovine

is still meaningful, because Cameron's wish is to live, and the hallucination let him do just that by giving him a ton of interesting and thrilling experiences - which, come to think of it, still sounds more like cleaving to the letter of the wish, rather than following the spirit as Dulcie explained. But the main goal he's given at the beginning of the quest (find Dr. X and convince him to save the universe) is still rendered moot, which is why I consider the book a narrative failure.

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Arthur B

at 20:52 on 2014-03-19I think part of what makes

Jacob's Ladder

work is that it's all about Jacob discovering and coming to terms with the twist, instead of being aware of what the basic problem is all along.

In particular, it's constructed as an argument that coming to terms with the fact that you're at death's door

significant and important, even if nobody ever knows you were reconciled to it except you, for the few seconds you have left before nonexistence beckons. Here Cameron is fully aware that he's got a terminal illness for most of the book, and it sounds like the purpose of his hallucination was not so much to wake him up to the fact of death so much as distract him and keep him entertained for a while until he no longer had the energy to sustain it.

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http://ronanwills.wordpress.com/

at 21:33 on 2014-03-19Jacob's Ladder was a solid idea, but in practice it left me frustrated because the execution of the twist made it feel as if the preceding story was pointless- the film gives the impression of going somewhere right until it ends very abruptly, at which point it becomes clear that everything up until the twist was basically just killing time. I remember individual scenes from that movie very vividly, but I couldn't honestly summarize the plot beyond "weird shit happens to a guy, then the movie ends".

@Robinon L Yeah, I think you articulated more clearly what my problem usually is. There's a certain kind of writer that seems to delight in emptying their mind straight onto the page and giving form to whatever stray idea happens to come to them. I've just never seen the appeal of that kind of story-telling (even The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy got too much for me in places) but a lot of people seem to find it appealing.

An author who (sometimes) does this well is Haruki Murakami. A *lot* of weird things tend to happen in his stranger books, but he generally keeps the reader confident that the plot is actually going somewhere. The exception is Kafka on The Shore, which devolves into incoherent nonsense fairly quickly.

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James D

at 23:05 on 2014-03-19

Jacob's Ladder was a solid idea, but in practice it left me frustrated because the execution of the twist made it feel as if the preceding story was pointless- the film gives the impression of going somewhere right until it ends very abruptly, at which point it becomes clear that everything up until the twist was basically just killing time. I remember individual scenes from that movie very vividly, but I couldn't honestly summarize the plot beyond "weird shit happens to a guy, then the movie ends".

Well, I've seen the movie a few times now, and I very much disagree. The preceding story is essentially Jacob at first recoiling from the truth - he imagines a future in which he has divorced his wife, left his children, and quit being a professor. He lives with a hot chick he knows from the post office and lives a life of few responsibilities. However, guilt and grief and questioning of that fantasy regularly intrude, in the form of weird events and reminders of the truth - he eventually faces the fact that his son died in a pointless accident and returns to his wife and children, he figures out some sort of explanation for his death in Vietnam (whether or not it's actually true is debatable), and having made his peace he accepts his death. He wouldn't have accepted his death in the end if the previous parts of the movie hadn't established the conflict and the character. It was vehemently not "just killing time."

Now, whether or not you view Jacob's internal psychological struggle to come to terms with tragic events in his life and the uncaringness of the universe in general as relevant is another question entirely.

The movie doesn't really spell any of that out, so a valid criticism might be that it's too subtle, obscures too many important plot points. I don't think so myself, but I'm not trying to imply that anyone who didn't "get it" is stupid. However, it is a film that makes more sense with repeat viewings, and if you didn't enjoy it the first time there's still a good chance you'll enjoy it more the second time.

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Sister Magpie

at 00:50 on 2014-03-24I feel the need to weigh in on Jacob's Ladder since I really liked it and agree with James. Though I do understand feeling like the whole story is basically wiped away with the final twist, I read it more the way James did, that everything about Jacob's life was set up to help him come to terms with death and do what he needed to do.

Btw, the chiropractor played by Danny Aiello in that movie is based on a real guy--a chiropractor who, having been to him, actually is a lot like Danny Aiello.

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Robinson L

at 20:36 on 2015-06-30So, my sister ptolemaeus recently read another Libba Bray book,

Beauty Queens

, because, apparently, it's supposed to be an answer to

Lord of the Flies

She ... did not like it. It sounds like the satire was about on par with that of

Going Bovine

- she said if Bray had just come out and written her points, it probably would have been

less

heavy-handed.

She also described the book as incredibly tokenistic: among the titular Beauty Queens you have the lesbian one, the deaf one, the Indian one, etc., and all clearly written by an author who is not and does not understand how to write any of those things.

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Robinson L

at 15:15 on 2016-03-31

Ronan: An author who (sometimes) does this well is Haruki Murakami. A *lot* of weird things tend to happen in his stranger books, but he generally keeps the reader confident that the plot is actually going somewhere. The exception is Kafka on The Shore, which devolves into incoherent nonsense fairly quickly.

Returning to this discussion because I actually just wrapped up listening to an audio recording of

Kafka on the Shore

a little while ago. And yeah, I got lost and bewildered early in because Murakami frontloads the strange and esoteric stuff pretty heavily. However, I pressed on, and it turns out that later on in the book, most of the really confusing stuff actually does get something approximating an explanation. There's still a strong undercurrent of vagueness and ambiguity surrounding the more supernatural material, but by the end of the book I could understand the basic story just fine. I'm sure there's a lot of rich nuance and subtext which blew right past me because it was too subtle and esoteric for me to apprehend, but I got the basic gist and it made sense, and I'm content with that.

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Robinson L

at 03:02 on 2016-04-30Oops, I forgot to mention that though I found

Kafka on the Shore

satisfactorily comprehensible, and I'm glad I read it, a section later in the book comes with a trigger warning for sexual assault. Granted, it's in a dream sequence and is doubtless part of all the esoteric symbolism which mostly went over my head—and although dreams can seem to effect reality in the universe of the book, the protagonist meets the other character in real life again at the very end, and she shows no signs of having experienced it, which I optimistically take to mean that it was all something which happened just to the protagonist and not really to her—but that doesn't make the scene itself any less problematic and icky, especially with the protagonist's repeated insistence (which in this case appears to be accurate) that he literally cannot stop.

#Ferretbrain #Robinson L #Going Bovine #Young Adult

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thoreau-up · 7 years

Text

College? rant

I’m just so put off by the college process. Like it’s making me not want to go to college.

Here I am, a senior in high school, being bombarded by college emails for four years with the subject headers saying shit like: “We soo want you here!!” and “you are the perfect match!”. This fucking shit is cruel. If college XYZ is sending me 4 fucking emails a day with headliners like above, then they better have a fucking full ride waiting for me. Otherwise, get the fuck outta my inbox.

But that’s not the only thing that pisses me off! It’s also the ~~~~personal~~~~ \(=^.^=)/~~~~ essay. I get that it’s a chance for us to “show” or I guess “express ourselves” to the admissions counselors, but then of course, it has to be perfect to the point where your essay is such a conglomerate of multiple people’s opinions to the point where the part that’s you is ultimately revised out of it. What’s the point of expressing ourselves in a personal piece when it’s just going to get us waitlisted or deferred or even declined because maybe the grammar is off, maybe the idea isn’t that great, maybe because it’s a bit of a tangent. Well, I’m sorry, GOD, maybe that’s just my fecking personality that you so desire to see. I have been working on a single essay for three months and I absolutely hate it. I don’t even spend that long on my research papers!

But wait, that’s not all! Standardize fucking tests. I love that shit like I love chewing razor blades in a bowl of bleach. Who the hell thought, “Let’s test every child, even international kids who are probably smarter than us- come on, let’s be real-, the same exact way. I mean, fish climb trees, amirite?” I worked my ass off, spending like 1000 dollars to ~master~ the ACT, only to do basically no improvement. Then, at the end of the summer where I did absolutely NOTHING INTELLIGENT, I got my dream score. I didn’t even test the SAT, I got a mediocre score the only time I took it. Look, I love Thoreau, like if he was alive, I’d probably live in his basement, but those questions they were asking would even have H.D.T. smoke five more blunts. I haven’t said anything about the fact that they also cost money. Way to keep the poor from rising out of their shacks! You must feel proud SAT ACT!

I know that higher education has been a money making empire since the dawn of life (even Thoreau complains about college debt in Walden). But if there are teenagers, like me, who are ready for the workforce and who are genuinely interested in learning, why do you gotta keep on fucking testing us? I dreamed of going to college since freshman year, but seriously? There is a legit point where we just aren’t gonna play with your bullshit. You don’t like it when I give you bullshit, so why should I accept your’s with a toothy smile?

If you’ve made it through all of that, then you’re probably suffering too. I wrote this instead of revising my college essay because I’m yet again, changing the entire thing to fit the remarks of someone who doesn’t even know me. I know college brings higher paying jobs, so don’t even try to tell me about all the good things college brings. I just fucking hate following the system. All i want to do is to learn some cool shit.

#I want to become a spaghetti through a black hole rn #college #studyblr #high school

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throwingideasatthewall · 3 years

Text

Clone Wars The Jedi Who Knew Too Much

(Terrorize a woman)

An adult

Also wait I thought they said no one was killed?.

Like back near the ending they were like “he was the only one,”

[Working �� With?]

So Force

That it was never ever brought up that they were dead or what happened to them or just whatever

...

Oh joy a funeral

with a shade of Eugenics

Dear Frick

(This is why I hate funerals; Bad enough that someone died in such a terrible way that they couldn’t be accountable in return to their home (which they should have) and had as close to a peaceful death knowing that they hadn’t inflicted further pain and suffering on their fellow man,

No let’s just parade that shit around and make everyone feel as miserable as possible while encouraging that misery

(Not imagine reminding them about soon their life will be over)

Dic k- . Re- mem-ber - Oh yeah I really care about all those unnamed people- - Also yeah let’s try to remember how they were [in life] well the fact that they are dead is robbed in their faces

And guilt-tripped

Dick.

[Ahsoka stop being an assumptious dick during a moment of silence,]

Well I may not respect the concept of funerals But I do respect the concept of If there were rules for an established event That you decide to participate in You should probably follow them,

[Empathy circle, Asking if sad

No shit Sher Lock,]

It’s a Funeral]

[also why does Ahsoka, Single out Barisse? She isn’t crying or seems noticeably more upset than any one else,

“My Light saber,”

My mentor was doing nothing,

I know, “younglings” But for the age we see them learning about light sabers There’s little to no chance that someone she learned besides, Could teach her anything,

“ Live for the living Jedi,”

Then why did you drag the body out of here and make people stare at it?

[like live for the living that’s all good and good, But part of that includes not being a dick, Doing your role to make the world a habitable and decent place, And being accountable, (If you’re inches away from death maybe stay home). And while this is going old fashion murder, You’d would assume they would’ve sectioned it off if they were anything resemb ling decent People,

Like not just one place (lane). for this dude to operate,

And in case of sociality, This place wasn’t closed off (permanent) for multiple reasons

(Like seriously you guys want to gather around a place where someone died?)

Point being; Living for the living means being acc-ountable And not subjecting people to staring at your dead body, -

Live through us . . . Er-

[But- they already did their fair share of living-

[apologies for the “gallows” humor,

Just...following the conclusion of the episodes focus on,

Death

[Point being; you can’t make me feel bad for someone who literally decided fuck the environment fuck life fuck humanity, i’m going to be a self-destructive asshole, And it kicked them in the ass,

[Like yeah yeah loss of life very tragic, World is a wor -ser, But that’s a quick moment- -]

- [Also yeah Jedi life, ]

Like screw all the cleaning staff,

Do they even get burials? (Weird hierarchy)

Also, those were all Jedi?

(Like seriously what were they doing down there?)

Also yeah no wonder everyone was suspicious,

Like five Jedi down there for no established reason

Weird glowy

Barisse

[Where’s Luminara?

You know, Barisse’s “Men-tor,” Authority assumer,

Known for . . . being on top of things. . . . And control -ling- - Micro manage - “Mov,

Seriously can anyone leave this woman alone for five seconds. .

Excuses she was already terrorized enough by Sky walker . Still sucks,

Why?

Re- public

Jedi-

How is Ahsoka part of the space military and doesn’t know that they answer to the space government?

[Did she think they were just going to keep them locked up in the same cell forever?

No space trial?

Like this seems like a very stupid excuse- To get Ahsoka involved, (And overly sus) And terror -ize this poor woman further

(Note I know what she did was downright shitty,

(Assuming she didn’t give a false confession under duress)

That doesn’t excuse the tox,-

Clones kil-

Seriously when and why does everyone care about the clones?

Like ‘oh no the (ex) child soldiers died!

Yeah?

Like they were “actual” people (By their standards) and Jedi (Who seem to rank up pretty high on the standards, even get a separate burial, and getting a statement ranking their lives only (Assumed authority is shit) right there,

Ad-miral

Also yeah they have different legal systems for different groups of people, (We’re just going to paint that as fine,)

Like I know this is assumed authority, But that’s adding another layer of tox that I think should be acknowledged -

She’s guilty-

Fair-

Dealt with Did-

Did Ahsoka just advocate for the death penalty- !?

Like her hand moved in that “over the neck,” expression, . Revenge

Dude this is more than venting

this is murder

(Focus on the don’t murder part, before the painting with broad strokes- , (You’d think one of the older Jedi would be advocating for this shit)

A-hsoka

Could’ve been a nice moment,

But the tone was off

And it didn’t make sense

‘ The evid-ence seems clear’?

How would the evidence have changed anything?

‘ things will never change,’

Weird statement,

- - Military

That’s a damn good idea considering they’re peacekeepers

(Oh yeah that’s the thing that’s thrown around pretty sparsely; These guys are supposed to keep the peace,

(Yet from the itchy trigger finger you wouldn’t think that)

Never mind Anakin’s suddenly developed terrorizing tendencies,

What would be good...

If they played it up for evil,

And didn’t ignore the unfortunate implications,

“Peace Keeper(s);

Hey, they actually called them out for that bullshit,

That’s good

And yeah she is 100% deserves to be ashamed, For enabling Anakin last round, And possibly brutalizing,

Note, there’s a difference between venting and brutalizing,

(Mostly decided by emotions,)

But still they killed more people than is acceptable either way (0)

Oh never mind she’s just bitter and completely ignoring the consequences of her actions

(Yeah!)

(This is not accountability this is Vigilante justice, Trying to solve everybody’s problems for them, Which is the just not how it works, You can’t assume accountability for someone else

You aren’t them

[Author-ity]

Strate-gy-

Um?

[What?] Is.

Is she a master now,

If not then where is Luminara?

And just tasks?

[i’m sorry but Luminara doesn’t seem like the type to assign that kind of work,

Being pretty controlling

And high on everything rule -abiding even their elitist attitude - towards the jedi-

Pretty sure she would’ve sent a bot or a servant or something . . . Not an apprentice? . . .? ? Literally nothing about Luminara?

“friend”

Assuming a lot that made they’ve only interacted once and nearly died that time,

Also, comfort?

Ahsoka is the only one that seems particularly disturbed-

Yeah Barisse is soft-spoken - But not really sad that I can tell

[all of her speech has been well actively non-consequential and nonsensical,

That vague]

Also yeah Ahsoka feels bad, After just say -ing Screw You �� To a general that reasonably pointed out that they’re peace keepers, and shouldn’t be interfering so much and so aggressively, in other people’s lives

(And that’s fair with Lord terrorizer but painted as it’s no big deal,” Over there)

So yeah you can’t really make me sympathize with someone who just a essentially said “Screw being an accountable person, I want to hurt people (Beyond reasonable venting parameters), And possibly kill them,

Yeah, no sympathy

Young

More so psychopathic,

[Like pretty sure she insinuated murder there,]

What’s with the cell phone music?

Seriously, look;

She’s fine

This,

Also geez she’s jumping right into the baggage?

Like poor Barrisse, She just wanted to go for a walk and get some tasks done and this person is bringing in the tox,

[Like seriously you don’t just randomly launch into a rant about the abusers and the system they created,

Everyone already knows,

Stick to the talking when there’s something actually good to share,

[excluding rare occasions, - ]

Dear frick what have I got myself. into?]

Damn poor Barrisse is trying to get out of this conversation..

Like dude that’s against code...

Dude..

Haha, you’re so cool

* through gritted teeth, *please help me*,

Genoisse

* Dear god you’re bringing up that terrible situation*?

[Help ME]

Oh yeah that’s not a completely weird thing to say to someone after a mur-der

[Ahsoka’s projecting fucking..

HARD

Please Leave

Ha, ha , ha

[that is a why-do-I-hang-out-with-you ex -pression- - Like Ahsoka clearly got the talent of starting a long rambling rant about random nonsense and subjecting the nearest person to it” trait from Anakin [Pre-quel] -

[Here’s a reminder that Barisse just wanted a book or some shit

To do her “tasks,” And got subjected to that, -

[Wait this was an all-call meeting-

[Apologies for the abundance of pictures but I have a lot of thoughts ,]

[Why did Luminara and Barisse get snubbed?

How is Ahsoka? [there are -multiple things wrong with this-]

Anyway-

L-eto

Because you’re a gosh darn terrorist, And out of the two Jedi she probably knows- Ahsoka is the least likely to go {immediate death mode}. Probably she is kind of death mody now, - Com-mander Tano, Really? - Besides all the normal, not Jedi guards,? - Because that smells of plot convenience, - Like she and Ahsoka barely had one conversation, Where she enabled Anakin’s crazy assumptions and tyran -ical ruling, - ? - [It’s- a nice shot-] - Whelp, - The guarding system are real weird here; Sometimes it’s the Centurions, This is the real first time we’re see-ing arc - Overly competent,

Also like five people dude, chill

Also the feck are you telling her this?

Oh — Guilt? (Good) . ? . [None of them have a red button except for one,

Hm, Oh yes it just completely open. the door with no shields and let the unarmed person go first,

- Also yeah dick move Ahsoka,

You were the Jedi to contact - Seriously, not your attorney

Oh heck even one of the older Jedi?

The ap-prentice- ?

This is getting to Mary Sue levels of “fecking unlikely,”. And “unrealistic,” To establish how much of an unrealistic unbelievable bad ass Ahsoka Is,

Which, congrats, I don’t believe it

That a person living in subsequent poverty would know the name of one of the young to-be Jedis, Who reach- ed such renown after a few short missions, Where not much was actually done,

And she never had an official staring role, on her own,

That’s pure wish fulfillment and it’s pure bullshit

[You know what would’ve made more sense? And I’m not excusing the story in any way I fecking hate it at this point,

But, What if she was someone screwed over by some people smugglers?

Who saw some serious crime getting committed,

And knew the name “Ahsoka,”

From stories of the other people that got screwed over by people smug glers,

Building on the past mythos; Her adventures with the others

Esta-blishing herself as a smaller crime fighter,

Typically. asso-ciated with people smugglers,

And allowing her to get up a bit of reputation

Form her own name. - Just -a thought - Time

Wow Ahsoka’s a bitch [derogatory non-identification)

The animation... is not helping,

Mine, Yeah you mentioned it,

Before She did you fuckin watermelon,

Also,

[Apologies. I meant to make it smaller, Didn’t; Happen,] But point being she really is trash;

Over - judgemental

Willing to go farther than humane

Willing to assume authority,

And yeah lady did terrible shit,

But it was five people, in a war;

If that’s what set Ahsoka off, she’s really not up to hearing about the boomer war

Because yeah boomer is far from innocent,

But these are boomers this shit is expected,

And certainly didn’t add or require that kind of tone or behavior;

That’s A “You Suck,” And a trip to accoun -tability

Also yeah let’s talk about the tone here for multiple reasons;

The Boomer isn’t the victim either

But by God, does it try to fame it as such,

When we come in,

[and I’m not doing pictures for obvious reasons,] They are cur-led up in a corner- Tone just barely making it about childify -ication

And I got to say this tone is fucking backwards,

With the elder boomer criminal, Portrayed with a unsteady unsure scared tone,

Meanwhile Ahsoka,

For my complaints of being portrayed Too young for her actions, Too old for the -tone,

Is now portrayed even older, With cyn- icism and defen- siveness- - Which doesn’t make sense since the present Gen doesn’t have anything to defend, And has the un-certain tone (Usually hope-ful) The tones are completely wrong

Right after it being said that Ahsoka acts young in many ways

Instead of acting Like an old person who’s already done their thing And has something to be defensive about

[not even the most toxic person in present Gen, Loses the uncertain tone until their time is up,]

And continues a constant theme of the series not having any patience and not taking the time to develop anything

They want to have , Ahsoka be cool and bad ass and say certain lines but don’t have the patience to work- To develop it properly,

Causing everything to fall extremely flat;

Re;verse (With correct Tone, Ass- uming this is a trap,)

O; What are you doing here?

A: What you?

[Door closes behind]

O; [crack Guess you’re not the only one les;] to fall into their trap,

A; [Lifts Tell me or -or up]

O; Or- or what?!

It’s not in your character ,child

A; Maybe [Slump not Ing] - - That at least feels natural and not like a body switch, - - - [also now you’re playing the death theme after he brutalized several people?]

Like, [Wow that was quite possibly the most pointless set up I’ve ever seen, With several easy resolvable instances - Play it straight with not a drop of self-awareness to drink,

And because Ahsoka acted like a complete jerk ass I have no interest,

Especially when they can switch her tone to old by gone enabler

[Good job taking any tension or suspension of belief, out of your story]

...

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throwingideasatthewall · 3 years

Text

Clone wars Lightsaber Lost

(Season 2 Episode 11)

Oh, so it’s gonna be a minor episode?

Neat

That’s Cool

Alright; Quote: (Haven’t covered one of these fully in a while)

“Easy isn’t always simple,”

True;

Take a look at the way Un-accountables Screw over the world And you need a flow chart to follow . But it always comes down to screwing over the world for our self- destructive tendencies)

Evil for fun- -zies!

Any- way; So we jump right in.. ]

No!

(Never mi -nd... it’s just the recap..)

This doesn’t have to be a train wreck...

Hey is that Ventress?

[no it’s not I’m a bad noodle-]

[A very hopeful bad noodle]

Er-

Is anyone going to weigh about that pink smoke about to encompass everything?

Just Me?

Okay?

Also white one does have any battles episode title for the episode where he actually lost his lightsaber?

Seriously we’ve gone from switching plot and characterization to switching title names.

“Arms Dealer,”

Okay,

It’s not as bad as dragging the child soldier to war

More Approp.

Kinda

Also please no more mercenaries

please no more mercenaries

My head still coming down from the last nonsensical filler arc We Had

With Honda? Was It?

The excessives are damn strong

And this narrative doesn’t know how to use it accountably

“Black market,”

The worst crime that can be comm-

HAHAHA

[But to be fair this is the kind of power I’d expect the Jedi Council to give Anakin as Boomer Bait]

Enemies-

The national healthcare of this fecking-

Either that or pollution

Could be both

[Sign that something is wrong]

No Help..

Great damn peacekeepers

“Ironically”

Also, that’s kind of the reaction I was hoping from Ahsoka

Kinda awkward

And forced-

Needs less emo

Did they drag children into this?

[I mean even more than this]

Arms Dealer-

That’s kind of the reaction, Eyes Down, Scan -ning Emot Ion Less Ly ...

Whose he selling them to?

Never mind

[There’s that tonal rift]

Also who do you think??

It’s either the Sep ar Tists

Or that other guy we don’t talk about

Joint

Not going to skulk out the place or check for any other entrances or exits

Also yet leave the child Padawan alone

With people who will very likely be okay with killing her

👍

Good job

Like if you’re going to be a. authority assumer at least be a less deadly one,

Like...

Nope,

Master Windu!

There’s was an example

Be more like him

Or not

[Assuming authority is bad]

That’s almost the look !

blank faced “yes, order,”

Never mind

Very never mind!

What does she do to screw it up?

Alright, Whelp

She’s Possibly Dead-

Also are you tell me Hondo literally picked, A bodyguard Outside a random club For his party? Weak

(I’m talking about the gangster in case I get his name wrong)

The robot detective one)

Any way...

(Also yes she has the biggest Indicator of Jedi..

(A braid)

On the back of her head...

[Look I don’t care how much respect people have for the police (over here) she would be gone by now,]

[I’m not getting into further details]

Whelp,

Dude he wasn’t even threatening you

Also, Oh yeah they give the child a gun -

Like that’s an adult - A child touching a gun isn’t threatening

Their reactions are too slow due to having no energy or initiative..

[But this is Ahsoka the abomination isn’t it?]

I can’t think of one episode..

They got the tone right

And didn’t put for a whole as much more mature for her age. *Too

Which is kinda of disgusting

And narratively screwy,

Also why did I just hear a lightsaber go off?

[What did she do?]

Her master

Really?

Aight

...

Whelp

Seriously if your adult in just assert your ground

[And preferably don’t make an entertainment sector so.. Screwy,]

My lightsaber

Time for some Looney Tunes esk charades

(Don’t put that much focus on it)

Also, he just stole a cop in training’s gun

Also THIS IS THE ISSUE with going into slums without any disguise

Hey,

You were just following him!

Master going to kill me..

No..

[Child would Be In Tears [Neg ative aff ila tion + “Com Fort-] [Poss-ibly]

What triggers it

Not exact science

But definitely not that reaction.

Nor.

[my mind’s already going blank with anger,]

This is not how a child would react

And I know it’s going to end up with Anakin giving the moral; That’s it not her fault

Or that am object isn’t worth risking her life

Or honesty

But; again,

Screaming at a baby is all I get

The message is un-applicable And Use- Less-

So is the episode...

[And it gives me that disgusting feeling...

Like there’s anything to be learned from this

Children Can’t Lie (Un-less instructed to)

Please Stop

Pro-

Anyway we’re already pretty far into the episode and my brain is going numb-

So Expect-

A lot Of “Uh-huh” s

The holocron episode, At least had the decency to keep her in the background

And even that felt mildly disgusting- when it came to that scene.

[Damn it]

Anyway the general gist of it;

‘A child has lost some thing and has to reclaim it before their abusive over involved parent to find out,’ (well it has been done slightly better not good, with slightly more realistic children, who didn’t have personalities) was dead upon arrival [Stale]

How to make it better?

Have it be Obi-Wan and Anakin

Obi-Wan already shown to be a bit of a control freak and overly scrutinizing of Anakin‘s actions

Causing Anakin to have such an over emotional reaction [obi-Wan still around]

Or (And the story can still work with Ahsoka]

Have Anakin show those tendencies;

Possibly replicating Obi-Wan‘s behavior

just being a dick

And at some point has given us so got a ‘never lose your light saber’ order paired (possibly) with a, ‘find the thing that you lost,’

Leading to Ahsoka emotionlessly searching for the light saber

The tension coming from the audience’s knowledge of what can happen to her

[not the character

That’s cheating]

[oh and now plot stuff is happening]

[Tumblr refresh recap ending [Damn it- Here-]

[Additional details missing]

Any way...

[Light saber-]

Uhm,

That’s nice

So anyway

That doesn’t mean she can’t cry

That does happen

But it has to be done correctly

And Precise ly

[Oh stuff, The door got kicked down]

The Face must remain taunt

Emotion-less

Still-

The Tears Come Only From The Eyes [Literally] [ Not metaphorically] No emotion -

Ahsoka isn’t a person yet she’s a combination of orders,

22:38 minutes Left

In 8:07 (I’m not doing the math)

[It’s too long]

[His eyes are weird]

Dude is 100% lying

He literally just pulled out name out of thin air

You can literally see the look on dude’s face..

Dude

‘His body language’ said liar

I’m not sure you can read that...

But it sounded like lies..

Any way...

Also who said he was a killer?

And ‘exactly’

STRIKE

No I know I didn’t record my exact thoughts on why this deserved a strike

It is so aggressively authority

And basically shouts;

Respect your Elders at every possible moment

To which I respond No!

Not to mention the gull.

You know how I feel about playing happy music over terrible morals, the inclusion of child soldiers, and of generational overstep particularly

It is no surprise this episode earned a strike

[Also it tries to paint profiling And police brutality As a good thing,

Ack!

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