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mortallydeepestobservation · 22 days ago

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The holiday pretense -3-

Summary: Namjoon has never been a fan of the holidays. In fact, he could list more things that sucked about ‘The most wonderful time of the year’, than things that brought him joy. Yet, beneath his cynicism, a flicker of hope appeared this year, as the faint scent of homesickness hung in the air. Unfortunately, there’s one tiny little thing that keeps him from calling home- his lack of a girlfriend. But fear not; this holiday season, Namjoon’s smart mouth gets him in a situation where he has no choice but to approach you- his longtime friend and roommate- with an unexpected request. Pairing: Namjoon x f.reader Genre: fake-dating, friends to lovers/roommates to lovers au; crack, smut, fluff. Rating: explicit. Minors do not interact Warnings: every single trope in the book; but with a twist. Dialogue heavy. OC is really bad at lying. Things are slowly starting to unravel. Drinking and a drunken kiss Smut warnings: morning wood, hickeys. Word count: Chapter 3- 17k Credits: You already know @callmenoona25, is the reason I got back on track with this story. But what you may not know is the fact that she is also incredibly smart and creative, and brainstorming with her is one of the best things that could have happened to me✨ thank you for all your patience and help. Author's note: uh... so, the plan was to have this story completed by new years eve. funny how that worked out huh... but don't worry, we are closing in on the ending. Where we are standing now, there are just 2 more chapters to come. Because, lets be honest, how much more can these guys take?? part 1: here, part 2: here.

Oh, also, would anyone be interested in being added to a permanent tag list? I keep toying with the idea of making one, so if you're interested, hmu ig?

current tag lol @uniquetravelerone

Anyway. Merry Christmas?

You stirred tiredly, frowning at the sliver of light that had somehow managed to sneak through the only crack in the curtains and land directly in your eyes. It pulled you from your slumber far earlier than you deemed acceptable. With a soft groan, you tried to turn away, seeking solace from the intrusion—only to be stopped by a solid body pressed against you.

Namjoon’s arm was draped securely over your stomach, his hand having somehow wandered beneath your shirt during the night. The casual intimacy of the gesture jolted your groggy brain into overdrive, the last remnants of sleep dissolving in an instant.

You shifted again, this time cautiously, trying to gauge your situation, but the movement elicited a soft, low moan from Namjoon.

That’s when you felt it—his erection, firm and unmistakable, pressing against your ass. Your breath hitched instantly, the realization flooding through you in waves.

The warmth of his body pressed closely against yours, your legs tangled together, and the weight of his arm draped possessively over you made your heart pound violently against your ribcage. His hand, impossibly warm, splayed against your stomach, sending sparks of electricity skittering across your skin.

You bit your lip, utterly unsure of how to navigate the situation you found yourself in. Just as you began to plot your escape—or at least a way to breathe through the moment—Namjoon let out another sleepy sound, a low, gravelly hum that vibrated against your back. He shifted slightly, adjusting his hips, and with that movement, pressing his cock more firmly against your ass.

Heat surged to your cheeks, a wave of nervousness mingling with an undeniable spark of desire. Damn. He was big. You’ve always suspected as much, but now you knew.

And knowing only made the moment harder to ignore.

“Namjoon,” you whispered, your voice barely audible in the stillness of the room.

At the sound of his name, he stirred slightly, the grip on your waist tightening for a fleeting moment before he relaxed again. A sleepy mumble escaping his lips— something unintelligible, but the low timbre of his voice sent a shiver down your spine. You tried again, a little louder this time, but still soft enough not to startle him.

“Namjoon,” you repeated your heart thundering in your chest.

His response was a groggy grunt, and then, to your utter dismay—and maybe a little delight��he nuzzled his face against the back of your neck, the warmth of his breath ghosting over your skin.

Your face heat up even more at his senseless sleepy affection, and you struggled to cope with the current predicament that seemed to dawn only on you.

“Morning…” he mumbled, voice thick with sleep, his breath tickling the back of your neck.

“Uh, morning,” you managed to stammer, trying to keep your voice steady despite the sharp rise in your pulse. You weren’t sure whether to laugh, cry, or combust on the spot.

Namjoon didn’t seem fully awake yet, his hold on you tightening slightly as he murmured something that sounded like ‘gimme five more minutes’ against your shoulder. You placed your hand over his, gently trying to pry it off your stomach, but the action only made him tighten his hold and let out a contented sigh.

This was supposed to be simple. You’ve done this before—cuddled up during movie nights, casual and comfortable— but never has his hand wandered beneath your shirt, never before did you get to feel him quite like you were right now.

You were hyper-aware of every single point of contact, the heat of his body, the steady rise and fall of his chest against your back, the very… noticeable evidence of his arousal still pressing insistently against you.

You struggled, torn between waking him fully or hoping he might shift away on his own.

But after a few seconds, seeing that he made absolutely no move to let you go, you ventured awkwardly.

“Are you…comfortable?”

He hummed softly, his fingers brushing absentmindedly against your stomach. “Mmh…yeah,” he muttered, still half-asleep.

Then, as if realization hit him like an avalanche, his body tensed.

“Fuck-” His arm jerked away as if he’d been burned, and he rolled onto his back with a groan, the sudden movement pulling the blanket askew. A rush of cold air immediately slipped under the blanket, biting at your skin and making you instantly regret every choice you made that led to this moment.

“My god.” He muttered, dragging a hand over his red face. “I-I didn’t mean-”

“It’s okay,” you said quickly, trying to ease the tension, your own face burning. “You were asleep, it happens.”

Namjoon let out a nervous laugh, still covering his face. “No, no, it’s not okay! I-I didn’t mean to…”

“Really, it’s fine,” you reassured, trying to lighten the mood despite your racing heart. “It’s quite normal for men your age, right? Means you’re healthy and everything’s-”

“Oh my god, please stop talking.” Namjoon groaned, dragging both hands down his face as if that would somehow erase him from existence.

“What? It’s true! It’s just biology. Natural instinct-”

“Please stop,” he interrupted, peeking at you from between his fingers, his ears now the colour of ripe tomatoes. “You’re not helping.”

“Okay, okay,” you relented, biting your lip to stifle the awkward laughter threatening to spill out. You turned your gaze to the ceiling, willing your own embarrassment to disappear, though the heat on your cheeks lingered stubbornly.

The two of you stayed quiet, the silence stretching long enough for the rhythmic sound of Namjoon’s breathing to steady and blend seamlessly with your own. The stillness should have been calming, but instead, it magnified the wild thrum of your pulse in your ears, a constant reminder of just how awkward this was.

You waited, hoping your heart would slow, that the tension coiling in your chest would dissipate. But the longer the silence stretched, the heavier it felt, like a fragile thread about to snap.

Finally, unable to bear it any longer, you cleared your throat softly.

“Seriously, though,” you said gently, “It’s fine. I’m not mad or anything.”

Namjoon let out a sharp exhale, finally dropping his hands to look over at you, his expression hovering somewhere between mortification and gratitude.

“You’re way too calm about this,” he said, shaking his head slightly, his voice still carrying the remnants of self-consciousness.

“Yeah, well,” you started, struggling to inject some nonchalance in your tone. “One of us has to be.”

A small, self-deprecating smile tugged at his lips as he sat up, running a hand through his already tousled hair. “You’re not going to let me live this down, are you?”

“Never!” you shot back with a grin, finally feeling the strange strain between you start to give.

“Great,” he muttered, shooting you a playful glare before pushing himself to his feet. With his back to you, he stretched lazily, his broad shoulders flexing with the movement.

“I’ll take a cold shower first, though, if you don’t mind.” He added, his voice carrying bit of nonchalance and amusement as he glanced over his shoulder at you.

You could only watch as he walked out of the room, his broad shoulders and confident stride disappearing through the doorway.

The moment he was out of sight, you let out a long, muffled groan, flopping back on the bed and burying your face in the pillow.

A swirl of emotions crashed over you —embarrassment, amusement, a flicker of regret, longing and something dangerously close to arousal. It was all too unsettling to fully acknowledge, leaving you in a confusing storm of emotions, their weight pressing down on you as heavily as his arm had mere moments ago.

The warmth of his presence lingered in the room, stubborn and inescapable. It clung to you, refusing to fade, making it impossible for your heart to actually slow down.

Get a grip, you told yourself. This doesn’t mean anything. It was an accident. A biological response. Nothing more.

The sound of the shower starting up jolted you out from your thoughts. You turned your head towards the closed bathroom door, watching as a faint curl of steam began to escape from beneath it.

Stop thinking about it, you scolded yourself, but the image refused to leave. Namjoon under the spray of cold water, his head tipped back, rivulets of water streaming down his toned back… the thought send a fresh wave of warmth to your cheeks, and you buried your face in your hands.

No! Not this again. Saying the words out loud might not help, but you muttered them under your breath anyway, as if sheer force of will could be enough to break the cycle. You pressed the heels of your hands into your eyes. Focus on something else. Fast.

But it was already too late. Your mind had betrayed you.

The moment from earlier replayed in vivid, torturous detail—the solid weight of his arm draped over you, his body pressed so closely against yours, the warmth of his hand resting so casually beneath your shirt. And then—as if your brain was determined to sabotage you further—the undeniable sensation of his cock, firm and insistent against you…

It all made it too easy for your mind to conjure images of him now, under the stream of water— each drop of water tracing its path down the expanse of his trim chest, the sharp lines of his collarbone, the defined strength in his thighs. Good god, his thighs.

And his shoulders, broad and commanding, perfect for digging your nails into. The curve of his arms, strong enough to hold you steady or pull you closer, each movement carrying that quiet confidence you couldn’t help but admire

You groaned again, louder this time, pressing your hands harder against your face as though you could scrub away the onslaught of thoughts. But the images lingered, refusing to simply be dismissed.

You haven’t felt this way since the early stages of your friendship, back when you harboured that stupid, fleeting crush.

Frustration bubbled to the surface—at yourself, at your stupidly overactive imagination, at the fact that none of this should even matter.

You were supposed to be pretending. Just pretending. So why the hell did it suddenly feel so real?

Why did he make you feel this way? His small, casual gestures—the brush of his hand against yours, the quiet laughter, even the soft mumbling in his sleep—were no longer just innocent moments. They were charged, electrifying, leaving you breathless and unsteady.

And the way he held you close when in public, the warmth and ease of it, like it was the most natural thing in the world. His genuine compliments that seemed to see straight through you. The way his gaze lingered, soft and intent, like you were the only person in the room. It was all maddening.

Unfamiliar.

Overwhelming.

Completely messing with your head.

The sound of water running in the background didn’t help. Because now you suddenly wondered if he was just standing there, letting the cold-water wash away the awkwardness, or if his thoughts were just as mangled as yours. Was he even thinking about you?

God, was he touching himself? He must, after all—

Stop it! You shook your head again, forcing yourself to breathe deeply.

This was Namjoon. The same Namjoon you’ve known for so long, your friend. Not someone who had any business making your heart pound like this or set your skin alight with a simple look your way.

This was the same Namjoon who forgot to take store receipts and napkins out of his jeans before tossing them the washer. The same Namjoon who broke a mug without even realizing it, too distracted by a conversation to notice the mess he made across the carpet.

The same Namjoon who tripped over his own shoelaces, then laughed about it like an adorable dork instead of getting embarrassed.

The sound of the water shutting off abruptly jolted you out of your spiralling thoughts, and you could hear him moving around in the bathroom. Your heart picking up again at the realization that maybe you weren’t that ready to face him again. You shut your eyes tight, willing yourself to calm down. Act normal. Nothing weird happened.

The door creaked open, and the fresh, earthy scent of his Cool Water shower gel wafted into the room. It hit you like a wave, freezing you in place as if your body had decided to betray you entirely.

Namjoon stepped out, his damp hair tousled messily, droplets still clinging to the strands and sliding down his neck. A loose t-shirt clung to his broad shoulders, the fabric soft and slightly damp, hinting at the toned frame beneath. Grey sweatpants rested low on his hips, completing the picture with an ease that felt unfair.

Your cheeks burned as a clear, unwelcome image flickered through your mind: your lips dragging along his damp skin, leaving a slow, heated path cross his neck, down his chest...

You’re hopeless. Absolutely hopeless. You need to move out.

Namjoon walked over; his footsteps soft but deliberate. And before you could fully compose yourself, he leaned over your body to retrieve his phone from the nightstand.

The sudden closeness was dizzying, and he seemed completely oblivious to your internal meltdown. The warmth of his presence enveloped you, and the clean, minty scent of his toothpaste rendered you nearly catatonic.

“You good?” he asked, his voice low, almost too casual, his gaze meeting yours.

“Yeah, yeah. Just... why are you still soaked?” you blurted, scrambling for any topic to defuse the tension threatening to suffocate you.

He glanced down at his damp shirt with a lopsided smile. “Didn’t feel like drying off properly. Why? Is it bothering you?”

Was it? Absolutely. But not for the reason he thought.

“It’s the middle of winter, Namjoon. You’ll catch a cold,” you shot back, your voice laced with feigned exasperations, hoping it masked the warmth creeping up your neck.

Namjoon raised an eyebrow, the barest flicker of amusement crossing his face as if he was holding back a smirk. “If you say so.” His tone was maddeningly calm, laced with a playful edge that made your stomach flip.

“I didn’t know you cared that much about me,” he added, his voice low, teasing and entirely too smug for your liking.

You opened your mouth to retort, but your brain short-circuited under the weight of his gaze—soft, warm, and far too knowing. It was as if he could see right through your attempt at deflection, straight into the chaos swirling beneath the surface.

“Someone has to,” you managed, crossing your arms in a last-ditch effort to look unaffected.

Namjoon didn’t move right away. He stayed above you for moment longer, his gaze fixed on your face, studying you with an expression you couldn’t quite place. The intensity of it made your cheeks heat again, through you tried your best to not show it.

Finally, he stepped back with a shrug, breaking the tension like a twig. “I’ll go make us some coffee,” he said, slipping his phone into his pocket as he turned toward the door.

You exhaled shakily the moment he disappeared from view, your body sinking into the mattress, and you pressed a hand to your heart in a futile attempt to calm your racing heart.

Why did every interaction with him feel like a minefield these days?

But the warmth he’d left behind refused to dissipate, nestling deep in the space between your ribs, even as you stepped into the bathroom. Turning the water to its coldest setting, you braced yourself, hoping the icy spray could maybe douse the fire he’d unknowingly ignited within you.

Goddamn it! You were an adult, perfectly capable of rationalizing your feelings. And logically, there was no reason to feel anything in particular about Namjoon.

Sure, he was effortlessly charming when he flirted, his sharp mind and quick wit made it hard not to admire him. And yes, the way his eyes seemed to burn into you, holding your gaze a little too long, was hard to ignore. But that was part of the act—part of the pretense.

And yet, there was something undeniably intoxicating about being on the receiving end of his affection, even if it was just for show. You’ve always secretly wondered what it would be like to be one of the women he pursued—those brilliant, breathtaking women who had him wrapped around their fingers. The ones who inspired grand, romantic gestures from him, the kind that left him stuttering and unsure in a way so unlike his usual self.

But that wasn’t you. It wasn’t then, and it certainly isn’t now.

You were here just to help him get through the holidays, nothing less, nothing more. The plan was already laid out, perfectly planned, and you couldn’t afford to let this mess with your head now.

Two days. That’s all you had left. And after that? Things would go back to normal.

Or at least, that’s what you told yourself. Even though a small part of you wondered if that was even possible anymore.

You weren’t sure if you could go back to being just friends after this. Not when your heart was starting to stake its claim, not when every interaction felt charged with something you didn’t dare name. You’d gotten so used to the feeling of butterflies every time he was near. So much so that the idea of casually brushing against him, of not leaning into him like it was second nature, now seemed like punishment.

The holidays were meant to be temporary, a brief interlude where you could play pretend and then walk away unscathed. But the closer you got to the end of the week, the more you realized that this wasn’t something you could simply walk away from.

You were toeing the edge, willing to risk everything you’d worked so hard to bury in the past few years.

Sure, there had been moments when the lines blurred, but those were fleeting, right?

Like that little jealous outburst at the bakery… God why did you do that?

The weight of your emotions were suffocating, pressing against your chest like an anchor, dragging you further into uncertainty. Each rational thought told you to pull back, to maintain the boundaries that had kept your friendship safe and intact for years. But all those same boundaries now felt paper-thin, stretched to their limits under the strain of what this holiday had brought to the surface.

You had come so far in keeping your distance, convincing yourself that you were fine just being his friend, his roommate—just a temporary solution for the week.

But now…now it all felt like you were playing a dangerous game.

And it wasn’t just the casual touches or fleeting glances that unravelled you. It was all those quiet moments in between—when no one was watching, when it was just the two of you, and he looked at you as if you mattered in a way that went beyond pretense. It was in the way he held you so tightly at night. In the way he sought you out in a room full of people, his gaze always searching for yours, making sure you are comfortable, as if you were his anchor, too.

And that is what made this dangerous.

Namjoon had a way of making everything feel real, even the things that were supposed to be pretend.

Every part of you wanted to scream at yourself to stop, to push him away and hold on to the semblance of normalcy you’d worked so hard to maintain. Yet, with every passing moment, you felt that distance closing, felt the walls you’d built around your heart slowly crumbling under his unspoken promises. Especially since he had this knack for being affectionate with you when there was no logical reason you could point to. No audience. No performance. Just you, him, and an unspoken need neither of you seemed to acknowledge.

When you finally felt cold enough to forget why you were so unreasonably horny at seven in the morning, you retreated back into the bedroom to get dressed. You tugged on a soft hoodie, the fabric warm and grounding against your skin. It didn’t erase the tension coiled in your chest, but at least it gave you something to hold onto.

The scent of coffee wafted through the air as you opened the door, a fleeting reminder of normalcy—or at least a distraction from the mess in your heart.

Namjoon was in the kitchen, leaning against the counter, scrolling through his phone. His mom, still barely awake, moved around the kitchen, preparing the tools she needed for breakfast. A fresh mug of coffee sat on the table, steam curling invitingly from it.

“Hey, love," Namjoon greeted simply, his voice warm and casual, the corner of his lips curling into a soft smile, his dimples making a devastatingly brief appearance. He gestured towards the steaming cup he’d prepared, his gaze lingering on you for just a second too long. “Coffee’s ready.”

“Good morning,” you greeted, directing a polite smile towards his mother before shifting your attention back to him.

Raising an eyebrow at the unexpected term of endearment, you decided you won’t to let him get in your head again. Two could play this game.

“Thank you, baby.” you said, deliberately exaggerating the word with mock sweetness, drawing it out just enough to make your point clear.

Namjoon paused, his smile faltering for just a second, as if the weight of what he’d just said had finally hit him. It was almost comical—the way his eyes widened slightly, the subtle tilt of his head as he realized he’d called you “love” so naturally, as ifwithout even noticing.

His dimples deepened as he recovered, but then there was a flicker of something else in his eyes—something that suggested he was more aware of the tension than he let on.

You watched him carefully, keeping your expression neutral as you took the mug from him. He opened his mouth, about to respond, but seemed to think better of it. Instead, he let out a soft chuckle, shaking his head lightly.

“You know I can’t resist messing with you a bit.” He replied, the playful tone in his voice thickening, tough there was an edge of amusement in the way he looked at you.

Like he didn’t mess enough with you this morning.

“What? Did you add salt instead of sugar?” you asked, keeping the sarcasm light enough to communicate your true intentions to him, but soft enough that no one else would notice the charged tension between you two.

Namjoon let out a soft snort at your jab, but the real reaction came from his mother.

A giggle bubbled out from where she stood in the corner of the kitchen, halfway through washing the rice. Her eyes sparked with mischief as she glanced over at the two of you. “Salt instead of sugar?” she repeated, a teasing edge creeping in her voice as she set down the bowl she was holding. “Is that your way of flirting these days, Namjoon?”

Namjoon groaned dramatically, rubbing the back of his neck as a faint flush crept up his neck. “Mom, please.” He mumbled, glancing sideways at you for support—or maybe escape.

You couldn’t suppress the grin spreading across your face, taking an almost perverse satisfaction in watching him squirm for once. “Oh, I don’t know,” you teased, holding the mug closer. “It wouldn’t be the worst thing he’s done this week.”

Namjoon’s eyes narrowed slightly at you, though the corners of his lips tugged upwards in an exasperated smile. “Don’t you start.” He warned lightly, his voice low and teasing as he shook his head.

Before you could get another word in, he stepped forwards, taking your hand with the mug still in it. With a mischievous smirk, he brought the cup to his lips and took a big gulp of your coffee, as if to prove there was no threat.

“See?” he said, raising an eyebrow. “Perfectly fine. You’re welcome, by the way.”

You blinked, stunned for a moment by his audacity.

“You did not just drink my coffee.” You said, glancing at your mug, your voice incredulous.

His mother chuckled, clearly amused by the unfolding scene. “Honestly, watching you two is like watching preschoolers flirt,” she remarked, her tone light but pointed. As she turned back to her task, she added with a sly smile, “Namjoon, do you still pull on her hair instead of just telling her you love her?”

Namjoon froze, his hand still loosely holding yours, his wide eyes quickly darting from you to his mother as though searching for an escape route.

You, on the other hand, could feel the heat in your cheeks, spreading rapidly as her words sank in. Your heart stuttered under the weight of her question, her casual delivery doing nothing to soften its impact. Did she realty see you that way? Did everyone? Because this—the playful back-and-forth—wasn’t even part of the charade. This was just…you two.

The playful energy of moments ago dissolved into an awkward silence, thick with unspoken questions and the sudden realization that your dynamic maybe wasn’t as innocent as you’d thought. You risked a glance at Namjoon, hoping to gauge his reaction, but his face was turned away, a flush creeping up the back of his neck.

Then, in true Namjoon fashion, he fumbled his way straight into the worst possible response. “Only when she asks me to.”

Your jaw dropped, and before you could stop yourself, you swatted his arm. “Namjoon!”

The innuendo wasn’t lost on you—or his mother, whose laugh bubbled up, filling the room with delighted mischief. Namjoon winced at your retaliation but managed a sheepish smile, as if realizing too late that his attempt at humour had only dug him deeper into the hole.

“Oh, you two,” Mrs. Kim chuckled, shaking her head as she wiped her hands on a dish towel. “Honestly, it’s no wonder it took you so long to get together.” She said with a smile, her voice light but laced with the kind of amusement only a parent could muster.

Namjoon groaned softly, running a hand through his hair. “Mom, please,” he muttered, clearly regretting every life choice that had led to this moment. His hand lingered at the back of his neck, rubbing at the spot where his embarrassment always seemed to gather.

You bit the inside of your cheek, willing yourself not to react—or to let the warmth rising in your own face betray you, one of your telltale signs when you were lying. Instead, you lifted the mug to your lips, completely forgetting that Namjoon just drank from it. The faintest hint of him lingered on the rim, but you forced yourself to focus on the bitter coffee, letting it anchor you as you scrambled to regain some semblance of composure.

Namjoon’s mother didn’t seem inclined to drop the subject, though, casting a glance between the two of you, her eyes sparkling. “You know,” she began, her voice as casual as if she were discussing the weather, “I’ve never seen you this flustered. It’s kind of adorable.”

Namjoon cleared his throat, clearly searching for an exit route, but his usual eloquence failed him. Because he very lamely defended with, “I’m not flustered.”

You bit your lip, trying to keep a straight face, but the sight of him so out of sorts was too much. You hid your grin behind the rim of your mug, the bitter coffee doing little to mask the warmth blooming in your chest. “Me either, now that I think about it,” you chimed in, your tone deliberately light. “I second that.”

His eyes snapped to you, a mix of betrayal and exasperation flashing across his face. “You’re the one who—Traitor,” he mumbled, though there was no real bite in his words.

You giggle at his reaction, watching with delight as he gently pushes off the counter. “I can feel you two ganging up on me in the very near future, so I’m going to start helping just to avoid any further embarrassment.”

His mom just grinned, clearly relishing the moment. “Don’t be silly. It’s good to see you getting along so well, that’s all. But if you’re so eager, you can help peel the carrots.”

Namjoon sighed dramatically, but began rolling up his sleeves to wash his hands. “Peeling carrots,” he muttered under his breath, his tone mock-sullen. “This is what my life has come to.”

You watched him for a moment, his shoulders relaxing despite the exaggerated complaints, and felt a strange kind of warmth settle in your chest. Being here, in the kitchen, with him and his family—it felt easy. Familiar. Like you belonged.

Without a word, you set your mug down and stepped closer to join him.

“Joining in on my torture?” he asked, his lips quirking in a half-smile as he reached for something in the cupboard above.

“Can’t have you slicing off fingers on Christmas,” you replied, nodding up at him, adding a pinch of that normal back-and-forth you were so used to, the kind that kept things light.

Or at least, you tried to.

Because, to your utter shock, Namjoon somehow managed to smack himself in the face with the cupboard door.

The corner of the door caught him right above his eye, and he flinched back with a quick, hushed curse.

You stare for a second, completely stunned, your mouth opening in surprise as a small trickle of blood appeared at the edge of his eyebrow. He cursed again, more audibly this time, wincing as he reached up to touch the spot, only to pull his hand away like the pain had caught him off guard.

“Holy—Joonie, are you okay?” you rushed to his side, instinctively grabbing a napkin from the counter.

He looked at you, his expression a mix of frustration and disbelief, though there was an underlying amusement that seemed to peek through, despite the situation “Yeah. It kinda hurts, though,” he admitted, glancing at you like he was trying to gauge just how bad it was.

“Yeah, no shit, you’re bleeding,” you shot back, holding up the napkin and carefully pressing it to the cut.

Namjoon chuckled weakly, the sound oddly endearing despite the blood trickling down his face. “I am?” he asked, raising his eyebrows—only to wince when the movement tugged at the fresh wound.

You didn’t even notice how close you had gotten, too focused on your task to register that you were standing on your tiptoes to reach him, or that his hands grabbed your waist to keep you steady. The proximity was a detail you were too preoccupied to process, nor did you notice Mrs. Kim watching the scene unfold with a fond smile on her face.

“Hold still,” you instructed, gently holding the napkin in place. “You’ll need some ice to stop the bruising.”

“There’s peas in the freezer,” his mom casually pointed out, “and bandages in the drawer to your left.”

You nodded absentmindedly, still focused on the napkin pressing against his face. The light pressure was enough to slow the bleeding, but you could already see the hint of a bruise starting to form.

You sigh, gesturing at him to hold the napkin while you get the supplies, his fingers brushing over yours in the exchange.

“Will you ever learn that you are tall and corners exist?” you chastised, walking over to the fridge to rummage for the peas.

Namjoon chuckled at your exasperation; the sound soft but warm. “Maybe one day.”

You managed to pull the freezer open, grabbing the bag of frozen peas and holding it up to the light. “Well, I’m not gonna hold my breath.”

When you turned to make your way back to him, you saw his eyes following you with an almost fond expression. “It’s lucky I’m cute,” he said with a wink, clearly trying to downplay the whole situation.

“You’re lucky I don’t pass out at the sight of blood.” You quipped, handing him the peas with a soft chuckle. “Now, take a seat. I can’t reach you.” You grabbed the band-aids from the drawer, your fingers quickly working on finding the right sized ones.

Namjoon’s lip twitched, somewhere between amusement and exasperation, but he obediently pulled out a chair and sat down, slouching slightly so you could tend to him without straining.

When you turned back to him, you noticed how he was staring at you—his usual teasing gone, replaced by something softer, more genuine.

“Hold still,” you instructed, carefully dabbing at the blood on his face with a fresh napkin.

As you worked, your fingers brushed through his hair, tucking a stray lock behind his ear. It was a small gesture, but it sent a sudden flutter through your chest, because his eyes fluttered close under your touch.

The soft kitchen light seemed to highlight the details of his face—freckles, small moles, the curve of his jaw—details you hadn’t truly taken the time to admire before. But now, with his eyes closed, his features relaxing as though the pain was a distant memory, you allowed yourself the indulgence of taking it all in.

For a fleeting moment, you almost forgave him for drinking your coffee.

His breath evened out, a quiet sigh slipping past his lips as you pressed the band-aid into place with care. Your fingers lingered against his skin, cupping his face to keep him still, and your heart faltered when you realized how effortlessly he surrendered to your touch, as if trusting you entirely to put him back together.

It was only then you noticed how close you were—standing between his open legs, his hands resting quietly on your hips as though they belonged there, silently urging you closer.

The realization hit you like a jolt, and for a beat, you froze. The proximity sent a wave of warmth through you, leaving your hands a little shaky as you reached for the peas again, hoping to focus on something other than the magnetic pull between you.

But just as you moved away, the atmosphere shifted, heavy with the feeling of being watched. You glanced up, only to catch Mrs. Kim standing in the doorway. Her expression was knowing, her lips quirking into a faintly amused smile that made your cheeks burn.

Namjoon’s voice broke the silence, drawing your attention back to him. “Will I survive?” he asked, a hint of humour laced in his tone as he glanced up at you, still holding the bag of peas against his cheek.

His small, half-smile was so casual, so utterly oblivious to the storm of emotions tearing through you, that it only made your chest tighten further.

“You just might,” you managed to reply, your voice steadier than you expected, though your heart was pounding in your ears.

“Good.” He stood up, hands still holding you close. “Let’s get peeling. No one gets away from this job.”

~~~

You paced around the bedroom, rifling through the limited wardrobe you’d packed, desperately trying to assemble something decent for Hoseok’s Christmas party—something you’d completely forgotten about until the last minute. And honestly, who would blame you after a day like this?

Cozy sweaters and jeans had been your go-to during your stay at Namjoon’s parents’ house, but those felt far too casual for an event like this.

And while the little black dress paired with sheer tights and thigh-high boots seemed like a solid option at first, the howling snowstorm outside quickly made you reconsider.

Namjoon had assured you it didn’t matter, but one quick scroll through Hoseok’s Instagram had your anxiety kicking into overdrive. His house was sleek and impossibly modern, adorned with Christmas décor that looked straight out of a designer catalogue. The polished tree, the subtle golden accents—it all screamed sophistication, a stark contrast to the decidedly average contents of your suitcase.

After watching you agonize over your outfit for half an hour, Minhi had kindly offered to take you to the mall. You’d politely declined.

Because going to the mall during the holidays was, in your opinion, the worst form of torture ever devised by humanity.

Instead, she rummaged through her own closet and handed you a pair of thermal tights and a leather skirt.

With her help, you managed to put together an ensemble that felt both festive and weather-appropriate. The leather skirt paired perfectly with the tights, and your favourite thigh-high boots added just the right edge. You topped it off with a boatneck burgundy sweater that showcased your shoulders, cinching it all together with a sleek belt.

When you finally emerged from the bathroom, Namjoon was sprawled on the bed, already dressed for the party in a cream sweater and loose jeans—a frustratingly effortless combination—and halfway through a book. His eyes flicked up as you entered the room, and a slow, appreciative smile spread across his face.

He probably wasn’t admiring at your outfit, you thought dryly. More likely, he was just relieved you were finally done monopolizing the bathroom.

“You look good,” he said simply, his voice warm with something that sounded suspiciously like admiration as he watched you settle at the little desk to finish your makeup.

“You don’t think it’s too much?” you asked, smoothing your hands nervously over the skirt before rummaging through your chaotic makeup bag in search of a lipstick.

His words seemed casual, but there was an undertone that made your pulse quicken. Compliments from Namjoon weren’t rare, but it was always how he said them—earnest and genuine, like he meant them even when he wasn’t trying to. It was something you were used to, or so you told yourself.

The sound of his book closing drew your attention, and when you glanced in the mirror, your eyes locked with his.

“Not at all,” he said, his voice warm and certain, his gaze unwavering. “You’re perfect.”

That was different.

You felt a flush creep up your neck, but you kept your gaze on the mirror, pretending to be absorbed in the precise swipe of lipstick rather than the insane fluttering in your chest.

“Sweet talker,” you murmured, hoping to sound unaffected, though the grin plastered on your face gave you away.

Namjoon chucked, the deep, rich sound filling the room. “Just honest,” he replied, propping himself up on one elbow. His gaze was intense, and it held you captive in that way that made your cheeks warm. Damn him.

You capped your lipstick and turned to face him, trying for a casual air as you smoothed down the sweater. “Alright, I think I’m ready.”

He rose from the bed, unfolding his tall frame with an easy grace and he made his way towards you with an easy stride.

Now standing in front of you, he reached out, fingers brushing against your temple as he to gently tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear. A simple, intimate gesture, that made your breath catch just the same.

You crane your neck to meet his gaze, feeling the weight of his undivided attention on you. His eyes seemed to flicker with a thousand thoughts, a whirlwind of ideas that seemed to cross his mind before he finally settled on one.

“I want to give you a hickey.”

Your jaw dropped, and for a moment, all you could do was stare at him, utterly stunned. “Excuse me?” you managed, your voice squeaking higher than you intended.

Namjoon’s dimples made an appearance as he tried to suppress a grin, though his eyes gleamed with pure mischievous delight. “I said,” he repeated, completely unrepentant, “I want to give you a hickey.”

You opened and closed your mouth, brain scrambling for a coherent response. “You-you can’t just say stuff like that, Namjoon!” you sputtered, heat rushing to your head and making you lightheaded.

“Why not?” His tone was maddeningly calm, as though he’d just commented on the weather rather than that sudden, unexpected declaration.

“Because!” you gestured vaguely at yourself and the outfit you painstakingly put together, still clinging to a sense of composure “Look at this! Do you know how much effort went into this? And you want to… to ruin it with a hickey?”

And fuel my late-night fantasies for the rest of my life while you’re at it, you silently added.

Namjoon tilted his head slightly, clearly amused by your outrage, his hand still hovering over your face. “I don’t think it would ruin anything,” he said softly, his voice low.

His gaze flitted briefly to your collarbone before returning to your eyes, warm but challenging. “I think it might add something, and make this whole ordeal more believable.”

“Namjoon!” you hissed, glancing nervously toward the door, half-expecting someone to walk in on this absurd conversation.

He laughed, the sound rich and teasing, before stepping closer, his legs bumping against your knees and almost making them open. The closeness made your heart go crazy, his presence overwhelming in the most intoxicating way. “Relax, I’m just teasing,” he said, tough the glint in his eyes suggested otherwise. “Mostly.”

“Mostly?”

“I told you I like giving hickeys to my lovers,” he said with a casual shrug—a detail you’d conveniently buried but now recalled with sudden clarity. The realization hit you like a freight train, and the weight of the implication made your cheeks burn.

Before you could respond, his hand moved again, this time his fingers grazing over your cheek before gently cupping your chin. “We want this to be believable, right?” he said softly, his tone low and disarming.

He tilted your head up, his thumb brushing lightly over your skin as his gaze bore into yours. His expression softened, and his lips quirked into a faint smile. “And you’re cute when you’re flustered,” he murmured, almost as if speaking to himself.

You huffed, clinging desperately to your last shred of defiance. “If you give me one then I’m giving you one too!” you protested, your voice more confident than you felt. You hoped the bravado would make him back down, but deep down, you already knew that Namjoon is just as hardheaded as you and would never back down when you push his buttons.

His eyebrows shot up, clearly intrigued by your declaration. “Oh, is that how it’s going to be?” he asked, his voice a velvety blend of amusement and challenge.

You crossed your arms, trying to look more confident than you felt. “That’s exactly how it’s going to be. Fair’s fair.”

His chuckle was low and dangerous, the kind that made your stomach flip. “Fair. But are you sure you’re ready for that?”

His fingers lingered on your chin moving down to your neck, his touch light, the words hanging between you, making the tension even more palpable. He lowered his gaze to your lips for a beat.

You squared your shoulders, watching him with a daring spark in your eyes. You weren’t quite sure where this new-fond courage was coming from, but you couldn’t back down yet.

After all, you couldn’t make his heart flutter like he did yours, but damn it, you could at least make his blood pressure rise.

“Oh, I’m definitely ready. Did you forget how I woke up this morning?” At that remark his confidence wavered, and you smirked. “Are you?”

Namjoon’s eyes darkened. He took a step back, but there was something in his posture now—something that hinted he wasn’t quite ready to let go of this newly formed energy between you. His fingers brushed against the fabric of your sweater, but it was almost as if he were trying to compose himself.

“I’m game if you are.”

You raised an eyebrow, trying not to let the rush of nerves make you falter. “Fine.” You said, mimicking his calmness, tough your heart was undoubtedly going to burst out of your chest and land on his lap any second.

Without another word, his hand slid to your neck, his thumb pressing softly against your pulse point. Then, with a fluid motion, he knelt in front of you, reaching under the desk chair to adjust it. He pulled you closer, the sudden shift leaving your knees brushing against his chest, until your faces were mere inches apart.

You gasped, the heat rising to your cheeks in a slow, burning wave as he leaned in, narrowing the space between you to a breath.

His lips hovered just above your skin, the warmth of his breath brushing teasingly against your neck. You froze, caught between the urge to pull away and the undeniable pull that kept you rooted in place.

He pressed closer, his body fitting perfectly into the space between your legs as you unconsciously spread them to make room for him. Your hands found his shoulders instinctively, fingers curling into the fabric of his sweater as though holding on for dear life.

You felt his lips curve into a smirk against your pulse point, a maddening mixture of confidence and playfulness. His cologne, warm and woodsy with a hint of something spicy, enveloped you entirely, clouding your thoughts and making it impossible to focus on anything but him.

“Relax, I don’t bite…much.” His voice was low and laced with amusement.

And then you wonder why your feelings were so tangled…

You held your breath as his lips brushed against your skin, featherlight yet sending fireworks through your veins. The shift in the air was palpable, and you were acutely aware how it all transformed from mere playful flirting into something undeniably intimate.

When his lips finally pressed against your neck—soft and deliberate—it was like the world tilted on its axis. The simple gesture unravelled you in ways you hadn’t anticipated, setting all your nerves alight. His teeth grazed your skin, and a soft gasp escaped before you could even think to stop it.

He consumed you entirely, leaving no room for rational thoughts. You couldn’t tell if it was the gentle pressure of his mouth, the confidence in his movements, or the sheer closeness of him, but it was intoxicating, overwhelming and undeniably, all Namjoon.

You could feel the way your body responded to him, melting into his touch, leaving you boneless under his attention, and for a second, you wondered if he could feel the heat building between your legs.

As his tongue traced the outline of the hickey he was leaving, you let out a sound—a quiet, needy whimper that surprised even you. It was the kind of sound that you’d never meant to make, the kind that gave away everything you were feeling, despite your best efforts to hide it.

Namjoon stilled at that, his lips lingering against your skin for a moment longer before he pulled back slightly, his eyes searching your face.

But you refused to meet his gaze. Instead, you leaned further into him, burying your face in his shoulder, one hand threading into his hair in a silent plea.

“It’s okay,” you whispered, your voice barely audible. “Don’t stop.”

His breath hitched at your words, and then his lips found that spot again with renewed purpose. This time, he didn’t hold back. His teeth sank into your skin, not enough to hurt, but enough to make you gasp, the sensation igniting a shiver down your spine. When you mewled, his tongue followed, soothing the sting with deliberate, careful strokes.

Time seemed to stretch endlessly as he worked, every second heightening the electricity coursing through you. Finally, Namjoon pulled back, his lips ghosting over your skin one last time before he leaned away to admire his handiwork.

You lifted trembling fingers to touch the spot, the warmth still radiating from the fresh hickey.

“Told you it would look good,” he said, his voice low and slightly rougher than before, though his tone was carrying he same teasing edge.

You blinked up at him, your brain still struggling to catch up. The audacity, the thrill of what his lips had done to you—it was all too much.

His confidence was effortless, and it stood in sharp contrast to the insecurity now blooming in your chest. You were a mess, your emotions tangled and raw.

This was supposed to be a game, you reminded yourself. A performance. A pretense for the world.

But the way Namjoon looked at you, the amusement and unspoken understanding glimmering in his dark eyes—it felt far too real. Almost like he understood something you didn’t.

“Right,” he broke the silence, his voice cutting through the charged atmosphere with effortless ease. “Before you get your turn, my knees are starting to hurt. Do you mind if I sit down?” He gestured casually to the bed behind him, his tone light, but his gaze remained steady locked onto you.

You nodded, your throat tight, the words getting lost somewhere between your racing heart and your scattered thoughts.

Namjoon casually sat down on the edge of the bed, patting the spot next to him. “Come here,” he said, the warmth in his voice undercut by an unmistakable challenge.

For a moment, you hesitated, a whirlwind of thoughts crashing through your mind. Every rational part of you screamed to play it cool, to call his bluff. But your feet were already in motion, betraying your resolve.

With a sigh, you stood, smoothing the edge of your skirt and walked toward him, heart still racing in your chest, but also a twinge of annoyance keeping it beating in contretemps—why did he get to be so effortlessly charming while you were left breathless and flustered by the slightest touch?

You reach him, and instead of sitting beside him like he expected, you boldly climbed onto his lap, your skirt riding up just enough to reveal a hint of your thighs.

“Is this better?” you purred, meeting his gaze in an intense staring contest. You couldn’t believe the words coming out of your mouth, but the challenge was clear: you could play his game.

Namjoon’s eyes widened slightly, his composure cracking for the briefest moment. “M-much better,” he stammered, his hands instinctively finding your hips to steady you, though the surprise in his voice was quickly masked with a hitched breath.

“Good.” Your whispered, the word barely escaping your lips as you leaned in, pressing your body flush against his. You couldn’t help but smirk inwardly, noticing the way he fought to keep his eyes from wandering down to where your chest was now pressed against him.

Closing the distance between you, you let your lips graze his jawline in a slow, electrifying touch that sent a thrill shooting through your veins. His heartbeat thrummed beneath your touch, its rapid rhythm mirroring your own, as though your hearts were tangled together in that moment. You smiled against his skin, trailing your lips down his neck, savouring the rare power shift you’d managed to create, though it was short-lived.

Namjoon’s hands slid from your hips to your lower back, his warm fingers pressing against you skin with a gentle insistence that sent a fresh wave of heat coursing through you. His touch was unhurried and deliberate, brushing beneath your shirt in a way that made your breath hitch and you skin prick with need.

You felt his body tense beneath your palms, every muscle coiled with barely contained restraint. His breath grew uneven as your fingers traced the curve of his neck, your touch lingering as you searched for that perfect spot to leave your mark.

Each movement was slow and deliberate, your intent clear as you took your time, savouring every shiver that rippled through him, every spasm that betrayed the effect you had on him. The quiet tension in the room thickened, each breath, each touch feeding the growing heat between you.

His fingers grip your back tighter, a silent plea for more. His eyes darken, and his mouth parts slightly, betraying the control he’s struggling to maintain as you pepper his neck with soft kisses. You catch his pulse flitter beneath your lips, and with that, you know exactly where to leave your mark.

You press your lips to the sensitive spot, and slowly, deliberately, you sink your teeth into his skin. Namjoon stiffens at the pressure, a soft gasp escaping him, but you don’t relent. Instead, you suck a mark—one that’s sure to linger.

He groans low in his throat, his hands moving up to your shoulders, but they’re not pushing you away. They’re pulling you closer, urging you to stay right where you are. His grip tightens again, not in restraint, but in a desperate need for more and you can’t help but indulge him.

You shift, moving lower to leave another mark, this time with more urgency, and then another and another until you reach the collar of his sweater. Once satisfied with his state, you leaned back, your gaze locking with his.

Namjoon’s eyes are blown wide, his ragged breath mingling roughly with yours. His chest rises and falls beneath your hands as you pull back, taking a moment to admire the marks you’ve left behind. The faint flushes of red against his skin making your heart race, a mixture of pride and something akin to love flooding your chest.

Your fingers glide along the sharp line of his jaw, your touch featherlight as you tilt his face upward ever so slightly. His compliance makes your heart stutter—how effortlessly he lets himself be guided by you again, trusting and open to you.

You pause for a moment, taking in the closeness, the way his dark eyes flicker with an intensity that threatens to steal your breath. Slowly, cautiously, you lean in, your lips hovering just a breath away from his, the warmth of his breath mingling with yours.

No more games, no more walls. Just this—raw, unguarded, and inevitable.

His breath was hot against your skin, the faint scent of mint makes your head spin. His hands tighten, as if anchoring himself in the moment.

But just as your lips were about to meet, the door swung open with a loud bang, the sudden noise splintering the tension.

“Ready to go? You two are going to be late-” Jackson’s voice trailed off as he froze in the doorway. “Oh?”

The room seemed to freeze along with him, the awkward, tension-laden silence settling in the air. Jackson’s eyes darted between you and Namjoon, his sharp gaze taking in every detail—the blush on your cheeks, Namjoon’s dishevelled shirt, and the undeniable red mark blooming on your neck. A playful eyebrow arched in genuine surprise, and an almost imperceptible grin tugged at the corner of his mouth as he realised what he just walked in on.

Namjoon was the first to react, his grip on you loosening just slightly, though he didn’t let you go completely. He shot Jackson a pointed look, the faintest blush creeping up his neck, though his demeanour stayed intact.

“We were just-” Namjoon broke off, realizing there were no words that could really explain this without sounding absolutely ridiculous.

You, on the other hand, felt like the air had been sucked out of your lungs. You could feel your heart pounding, your cheeks flushed, and for the first time since walking into this room, you regretted wearing that confident smirk. You pulled back slightly, hands still resting on Namjoon’s shoulders, and glanced at Jackson, whose grin only grew wider.

“I-uh... we were just about to head out,” you stammered, standing up off Namjoon’s lap, awkwardly fixing your skirt before reaching for your purse, suddenly too aware of how dishevelled you both looked.

Fuck, fuck-fuckity, fuck.

“Yeah, sure looked like it,” Jackson grinned, leaning against the doorframe far too casually.

Namjoon exhaled sharply, his expression shifting from amused to mildly exasperated as he shot Jackson a look that could only be described as a warning. “Jackson,” he said, his tone light but firm.

Jackson raised his hands in mock surrender. “Alright, alright. I’ll be out here if you need me. Just try not to be too late, lovebirds.”

With a final chuckle, he stepped back, leaving the door ajar as he walked down the hall.

You let out a long breath, your hands now nervously smoothing over your skirt, trying to pretend like nothing had happened, getting a step ahead of Namjoon’s usual calm demeanour. But the charged energy between you two was hard to ignore.

“Well, that was... perfectly timed,” he muttered, his voice tinged with amusement, confirming yet again, that Namjoon was some kind of rare breed of monk that could remain calm even in the weirdest of situations, and it was only you and your stupid brain misinterpreting everything about the situation you were in.

You shot him a look, anxiety prickling at the back of your mind. What would have happened if you kissed him?

He probably would have finally dropped the act, and you in the process with it. God damn it all. Freud would have a field day dissecting your brain right now.

Namjoon tilted his head, watching you fidget with your lipstick, a flicker of something unreadable in his expression. It wasn’t smugness, like you expected, or teasing, like you feared. It was softer, genuine, almost curious.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his voice low enough that it didn’t feel like a question so much as an invitation to exhale.

You forced a shrug, your hand trembling just slightly as you turned back to the mirror, feigning nonchalance. “Yeah, never been better,” you replied, the words too casual, too light to be entirely convincing.

Namjoon’s gaze lingered, the weight of it making your skin buzz, but you avoided meeting his eyes, focusing instead on reapplying your lipstick, pretending like the tremor in your hands wasn’t there

“You, uh, might want to wipe that off your neck, though,” you added, gesturing vaguely toward the red lipstick smudges you left on his skin, along with the faint, blooming hickeys.

He blinked, his fingers instinctively brushing over his neck, and when he caught sight of his reflection in the nearby mirror, his lips quirked into a big smile.

“Not bad,” he murmured, his tone light but carrying an edge of amusement that made your stomach flip as he reached for one of your makeup wipes.

You shot him a glare through the mirror, head flooding your cheeks.

“What?”

Your glare sharpened, your words tumbling out before you could stop them. “What do you mean, what? You’re just... too calm about this!”

He raised an eyebrow, his hand pausing mid-wipe. For a moment, you thought he might actually take you seriously, but then that signature grin spread across his face.

And with maddening ease, he threw your own words from this morning right back at you.

“Yeah, well. One of us has to be.”

~~~

You were the last guests to arrive at Hoseok’s place.

Jackson and Minhi had dropped you off a few streets away on their way to the market for an intense last-minute Christmas shopping session. As the car slowed down to a stop, Minhi gave you a knowing smile, warm and teasing, while Jackson couldn’t resist throwing in one last jab from the driver’s seat.

“Don’t let anyone see that neck of yours, yeah? The marks might be gone by New Year’s though.” His grin was all trouble, clearly enjoying himself far too much.

Minhi swatted his arm, rolling her eyes, but her laughter betrayed her amusement. “Ignore him,” she said, though the grin tugging on her lips mirrored his perfectly.

Namjoon shot them both a withering glare, his hand tugging at the collar of his jacket in a futile attempt to shield himself from their bullying.

“Thanks for the reminder,” he muttered dryly, his voice twinged with irritation as he opening the car door for you.

You busied yourself arranging your coat, willing the heat rising in your cheeks to fade. It didn’t help that Jackson leaned out of the car window, calling after him, “Don’t worry, Joon. We’re all adults here. It’s normal!”

The sound of Minhi’s exasperated, “Jackson, drive!” was barely enough to drown out his laughter as they sped away, leaving you and Namjoon standing in the cold, with an interesting kind of silence stretching between you.

As the car disappearing into the snowy street, you felt the familiar nerves creep back in, knotting in your stomach.

Namjoon must have noticed because, without hesitation, his hand found yours. The gesture was casual, but the warmth of his palm grounded you. He gave your fingers a small squeeze before guiding you down the quiet street towards Hoseok’s house.

“Don’t worry,” he said, voice soft and steady as he glanced at you with a small, warm smile. “It’s just Hoseok.”

You managed a smile in return, through it felt more like an act of bravery than genuine reassurance. “Yeah, which means everyone will be there.” you laugh, even as anxiousness bubbled in your stomach

It wasn’t just the idea of walking into a house full of people you barely knew. It was what the party represented: being introduced to Namjoon’s closest friends, the ones who’d grown up with him, who knew him inside and out. It felt like lying all over again.

The role felt just as daunting, the weight of pretending just as heavy as when you first arrived at Namjoon’s parents’ house, stepping into the same carefully constructed charade. But now, it seemed even more complicated—because these people weren’t just family. They were the ones who’d shaped him, who might see through you with a single glance and not be afraid to call it out.

The cold nipped at your skin, but Namjoon’s touch was steady and warm. Snowflakes drifted lazily from the sky, catching in your hair and melting against your searing cheeks.

Ahead, the glow from Hoseok’s house spilled onto the snowy lawn, warm and inviting. The windows framed silhouettes of people milling about inside, the occasional bursts of laughter spilled into the quiet night. It was the kind of place that instantly felt alive, where every sound promised laughter and warmth—but to you, it was another reminder of how much was riding on this evening.

Namjoon’s voice broke the quiet. “Hey,” he said, his tone softer than usual. He slowed his steps, turning to look at you fully. “You don’t have to be nervous. They’ll love you.”

You shot him a sidelong glance, raising an eyebrow. “Love me, or love the idea of you finally bringing someone over?”

His smile faltered for a split second, replaced by a sheepish look that made your stomach flip. “Maybe a little of both,” he admitted, his tone light. But before you could dwell on it, he added, “But I wouldn’t have brought you if I thought it wouldn’t have been great.”

“I just feel like I’m lying again.”

Namjoon’s expression softened at your words, his steps coming to a full stop as he gently tugged your hand, prompting you to face him. His thumb brushed lightly over your knuckles, the comforting motion grounding you despite the whirlwind of thoughts swirling in your head.

“You’re not lying,” he said firmly, his voice steady and sure. “You’re here because you’re important to me, and that’s the truth. And the rest…” He paused, searching your eyes. “The rest doesn’t matter as much as you think it does.”

You frowned, your nerves still quickening under the surface. “But they don’t know that. To them, I’m your girlfriend. This whole thing—it’s still lying.”

“I know it feels like that,” he said gently. “But... it doesn’t feel like pretending to me. Not when it’s you.”

His words caught you off guard, a quiet warmth blooming in your chest even as your stomach twisted with doubt. You searched his face, trying to read between the lines, but his expression was earnest, open, and it only made your heart ache just a bit more.

“But what if they see through it?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. “What if they realize it’s all an act?”

Before you could overthink it further, his hand gently cupped your cheek. He smiled, a small, crooked grin that managed to melt away some of the tension in your chest. “They’ll be so busy being excited that I finally brought someone, they won’t even notice.”

Namjoon’s lighthearted comment earned a soft laugh from you, even as you shook your head against his palm. “You’re impossible,” you murmured, the smallest of smiles tugging at your lips.

“I mean it,” he said, his grin softening into something more genuine. “And trust me, with you looking this stunning, it’s going to be hard enough to keep the boys from hitting on you, let alone anyone noticing.”

The comment pulled a genuine laugh from you this time, the weight over your shoulders easing ever so slightly. “I’ll keep that in mind if things get awkward.”

Namjoon’s thumb gently brushed against your cheek. “It won’t. And even if it does, I’ll be right there with you. Promise.”

You held his gaze for a moment longer, finding something steadying in the way he looked at you. “Thank you Joonie, I’m sorry I keep making this difficult on you.”

Namjoon shook his head, his expression morphing again into something soft, almost weak. “You’re not making it difficult,” he said gently. “I get it. It’s a lot to ask of you, and I’ve probably handled this in the most Namjoon way possible—which, let’s be honest, means a bit of a mess.”

You couldn’t help but smile at his self-deprecating humour, even as your heart ached a little. “You’ve handled it fine. It’s me who keeps overthinking everything.”

He tilted his head, his gaze searching yours with a quiet intensity. “You’re not overthinking—you’re just feeling. And that’s okay. I’d be worried if you weren’t.”

You let out a small laugh, shaking your head. “Joon, you make it sound like I’m the most complicated person in the world.”

“Maybe you are,” he teased lightly, his grin reappearing. “But I like complicated. Complicated is honest.”

The warmth in his voice made your cheeks flush, and for a moment, you felt like the world had narrowed to just the two of you, the crisp night air and the soft crunch of snow beneath your boots fading into the background.

Namjoon smiled, the kind of smile that made his dimples appear and seemed to light up the cold night. Without another word, he started walking again, leading you up the stairs, your hand still firmly in his.

Before you could chicken out, he reached the door and knocked. It swung open almost immediately to reveal Hoseok, dressed in an awful Christmas sweater with reindeers humping, beaming like he’d been stationed there just waiting for you to show up.

“There they are!” Hoseok’s voice was jubilant as he threw his arms wide, ushering you both inside. “The couple of the hour!”

The heat inside hit you instantly, a stark contrast to the cold that made itself at home in your bones, but it was nothing compared to the heat that rose to your face at Hoseok’s greeting.

“Hobi, tone it down,” Namjoon said, though there was no real annoyance in his voice. He stepped forward to pull Hoseok into a quick hug, shaking his head. “You’re going to scare her off before we even get inside.”

Hoseok turned to you; his grin as impish as ever. “Not a chance. If I remember correctly, she’s tougher than she looks.” His smile only grew wider when he walked over to hug you, “It’s really good to see you again, peach,”

Then, with a theatrical lean forward, he added in a mock-serious whisper, “I’ve always known the two of you were endgame, by the way.”

Your mouth almost fell open, but before you could think of a reply, Namjoon groaned, “Don’t start this again.”

“Oh, I’ve barely started,” Hoseok shot back with a wink, stepping aside to let you both in. He gestured grandly toward the lively house behind him. “But first, welcome to the party. And just for the record, I’d like to take full credit for this coupling.”

“You?” you asked lightly, finally finding your voice. You steadied yourself with a hand on Namjoon’s shoulder as you leaned down to tug off your boots. “What exactly did you do?”

“I’d like to believe,” Hoseok said, his grin growing impossibly wider, “that my relentless flirting with you last time I visited was the final push Namjoon needed to grow a pair and actually make a move on you.”

Your laugh came out before you could stop it, equal parts shocked and entertained. You glanced at Namjoon, who looked simultaneously mortified and amused, his ears flushing a telltale red.

“You’d be surprised,” Namjoon chuckled, shooting Hoseok a sidelong look that was both warning and affectionate. “Though I’d hardly call your meddling relentless flirting. More like annoying provocation.”

“Semantics,” Hoseok said breezily, waving his hand as if to dismiss Namjoon’s critique. “The important thing is that it worked. You two are here now—perfect couple—and I have front-row seats. Life is good.”

Namjoon rolled his eyes, but his grip on your arm tightened slightly, as if to silently ask if you were okay. When you gave him a small amused nod, he relaxed, steering you further inside, with a warm palm against your back.

“Come on,” Hoseok said, leading the way. “Drinks are in the kitchen, snacks everywhere, and just about everyone’s dying to meet Namjoon’s mystery girlfriend. No pressure.”

The house hummed with warmth and energy, a perfect blend of festive chaos and cozy familiarity. “This is quite a big event, huh?” you asked, your tone light, though your eyes darted over the bustling crowd in the living room absorbing the vibrant energy.

“Only the best for my favourite people,” Hoseok replied smoothly, his grin widening as he gestured ahead. “You included, of course.”

Namjoon chuckled softly beside you, the low sound a comforting anchor in the lively chaos. His hand stayed firmly on your back, a grounding presence as the room’s details unfolded before you.

The chatter, bursts of laughter, and the smooth strains of jazzy Christmas music created a lively background symphony. The sweet, inviting scents of cinnamon, mulled wine, and a hint of vanilla wrapped around you, mingling with the warmth of the room. The golden glow of twinkling lights bounced off the ornaments, their soft shimmer casting a dreamy radiance over the space.

Your attention shifted on a familiar face—Jungkook, donning a garishly cheerful sweater that matched his girlfriend’s equally ugly one. Their cheerful waves caught your eye, Jungkook’s grin as bright as ever. His girlfriend nudged him with a playful laugh, clearly teasing him about something you couldn’t catch over the hum of the room. You waved back, a sense of relief blooming at the sight of friendly faces.

Namjoon followed your gaze, his lips curving into a small smile. “Looks like they’re already excited to see you,” he murmured, his voice low enough that only you could hear.

“Or you,” you teased, bumping his shoulder lightly. “He’s your gym buddy. I’m just here to admire his biceps.” You said, unable to resist the playful jab.

Namjoon let out a warm laugh, the sound rolling out effortlessly as he shook his head. “You’re my girlfriend.” he shot back with a smirk, “You’re only allowed to admire my biceps.”

Little did he know you already did.

You giggled, the playful banter a small but welcome release of tension. The knot in your chest loosened, a sense of ease slipping in. Whatever was waiting for you tonight, Namjoon was by your side. And if things went sideways, well…you could always throw him under the bus.

Of course, you already knew most of his close friends, whether from their random visits or the funny stories Namjoon had shared during your late-night talks. Still, you couldn’t ignore the curious glances that followed you both. Conversations dipped into pauses as people noticed Namjoon, greeting him with warmth—enthusiastic hugs and handshakes—and every time, their attention shifted to you, eyes filled with intrigue.

True to form, Namjoon was the perfect fake boyfriend. With a proud grin, he introduced you to everyone, weaving a believable story about how you met and ended up together. The pride in his voice sent a subtle flutter through your chest, even if the situation felt a little surreal.

After each introduction, he leaned in close to you, his breath warm against your ear as he whispered who they were, adding in fun tidbits or inside jokes about each person. It felt natural—too natural—like you’d always been a fundamental part of his world.

At some point, you found yourself chatting with one of Namjoon’s childhood friends, a quiet but kind woman named Jisoo, who had been part of their friend group since high school. Her presence was calming, and you found yourself sharing a laugh over something she said about Namjoon being a “closet softie” in his youth.

Meanwhile, Namjoon was off talking to a few people near the kitchen, gesturing enthusiastically with his hands. You could see the comfort and familiarity in his body language as he laughed along with his friends, but every so often, his eyes would flick back to you, checking in. It was such a subtle thing, but it made you feel like you were still the centre of his attention, even amidst all the noise and laughter.

Jisoo, noticing your gaze, smiled knowingly. “He’s a good guy, you know. You’re really lucky.”

Taken aback, you blinked, unsure how to respond. “Oh, uh, thanks,”

“I just mean,” she continued, “I’ve known him for years, and seeing him like this—happy, with someone who makes him smile—it’s a big deal. He’s been kind of... closed off since Su-Ho.” She gave you an appraising look before adding, “I’m glad you’re here.”

The words hit harder than you expected. You knew that Namjoon hadn’t been in a relationship since his last heartbreak. In the years living with him, you’d seen glimpses of the scars it left behind—the guarded moments, the hesitation when he let someone close, the way he avoided lingering too long in conversations about love. Hearing someone else acknowledge that weight, and imply that you might be a part of helping him carry it, it was humbling, overwhelming, and terrifying all at once. It made your chest tighten impossibly.

You had always wanted the best for him, of course. That’s why you’re here, wasn’t it? Back when you first moved in together, you’d even gone out of your way to suggest some of your single colleagues from work as potential matches. Because Namjoon was incredible—a unique combination of a golden heart and a brilliant mind. The right amount of sexy and dorky, a poet with a stubborn streak. The idea that someone could break that heart had always felt deeply unfair.

Especially since he barely held any resentment towards his ex.

But he’d always gently turned down your suggestions, saying he just wasn’t looking. You’d understood, of course. And if you were being completely honest, after years of living together, you couldn’t deny the small pang of dread at the thought of him finding someone else. Not because you didn’t want him to be happy, but because the two of you had fallen into a rhythm, a quiet, comfortable life shared between two people who had no one else to come home to. The thought of losing that, of being replaced, was a kind of ache you didn’t want to examine too closely.

You also understood his frustration when all he wanted was to visit home without having his relationship status turned into an interrogation. His life, his choices, they were enough—but somehow, they never seemed to be to anyone else.

And now, here you were. His friends accepted you so easily, welcomed you into their circle as though you’d always belonged there. But instead of feeling relief, you couldn’t shake the small, gnawing sensation of betrayal. It wasn’t towards Namjoon or his friends—it was towards yourself.

Because you weren’t entirely sure if you were pretending anymore.

“Oh! You’re Namjoon’s girlfriend, right?” a melodic voice cut through your thoughts, pulling you abruptly back to the present.

You turned towards the voice, immediately recognizing the woman approaching. “I’m Iseul, I work at the pastry shop you visited!” she said with an easy charm. Her big pouty lips curved into a warm smile, and before you could react, she enveloped you in a friendly hug.

“I kept meaning to come over and say ‘hi’, but I couldn’t get a break,” she huffed, her tone amused, her energy bright and disarming.

But none of that registered fully because your brain had latched onto something else entirely—Namjoon had introduced you as his girlfriend at the pastry shop.

Even in a situation where there was no need for the relationship, no one to convince, he’d called you his girlfriend.

The realization hit hard, quickly spiralling into another—your mini jealous outburst that day, the kiss you’d pressed to his lips out of pure, irrational possessiveness, all over something that didn’t even happen.

Heat crept up your neck as the memory replayed in vivid detail, your stomach twisting with a mix of embarrassment and something far more complicated.

“You should have seen those two” Iseul chirped, her voice light and cheerful as she glanced at Jisoo. “Barely managed to keep their hands off one another.”

She giggled, clearly entertained by the memory, and you froze, your heart pounding in your chest.

Jisoo raised an eyebrow, her curiosity piqued as she turned to you. “Really? Namjoon? Didn’t think he was one for public displays.”

Your mind scrambled for a response, but all you could do was let out a nervous laugh, one that sounded forced even to your own ears.

“Ah, well,” you started stalling for time as your brain worked overtime to piece together something coherent. “I guess he was just… excited about the milk bread.”

Iseul’s giggle turned into a full laugh at your weak explanation, and Jisoo smirked knowingly.

“Is that what the kids are calling it these days?”

You opened your mouth to respond, but thankfully, Namjoon appeared by your side, his timing nothing short of miraculous. He slid an arm around your waist, his presence grounding you instantly.

“What’s this about milk bread?” he asked, his tone light but curious as his eyes dared between Iseul and Jisoo.

Iseul grinned mischievously. “Oh, just reminiscing about how involved you two were the last time you came to the shop.”

Namjoon’s brows shot up briefly, but he recovered quickly, his lips twitching into a sheepish smile. “Ah, yeah. This one likes mistletoe.” He gave a playful nod your way, his words laced with a teasing edge.

You felt your face heat up, your cheeks likely resembling the colour of the poinsettias in the room. “It’s festive,” you mumbled, glaring half-heartedly at Namjoon.

Jisoo raised an amused eyebrow. “Are you two always this committed to the holiday spirit?”

Namjoon chuckled, his hand tightening around your waist. “What can I say? She makes the season bright.”

The warmth of his tone made your heart stumble in your chest. It was the kind of comment that should have been part of the act, but the way he said it felt too genuine. Just a little too real.

“Sap,” you murmured, avoiding his gaze, which in turn earned a delighted laugh from the group.

Iseul sighed dramatically, clasping her hands together. “You two are disgustingly cute, you know that?”

Namjoon laughed again, his dimples flashing as he shrugged. “I’ve actually seen worse.”

As the conversation continued, you leaned into Namjoon’s side, his steady presence helping you navigate the teasing with a bit more grace. Still, the whole conversation lingered into your mind, and it made you wonder just how much of this you could actually take.

After a little while, the group moved to the couch, each one getting a glass of wine. You exchanged pleasantries with Jungkook and his girlfriend, laughing over some story of Namjoon being a klutz in the gym, and enjoying the warmth of the fireplace. As you took another sip of your wine, you couldn’t help but notice how comfortable Namjoon was in this environment—the ease with which he moved through the room, greeting people and making them laugh. His energy was contagious, and the way his friends reacted to him—warm, animated, full of admiration—was proof of the bond he shared with them.

“What’s going on here?” you said, half-teasing, as you watched him chat with a group by the fireplace. He’d just taken a seat on the couch, and you leaned over the back of it, one of your hands naturally moving over his shoulder and resting against his chest.

“I think I’m being serenaded by Taehyung,” Namjoon looked up at you, his smile widening as he caught your eye, and you couldn’t help but grin. His hand quickly found yours, intertwining your fingers together as he leaned back comfortably into the couch and you.

“Really? A serenade?” you raised an eyebrow, intrigued and amused at the same time.

Namjoon chuckled, a soft smile creeping into his face as he glanced at Taehyung across the room. “Yeah. Didn’t see that coming, but it’s pretty great.”

You followed his gaze to where Taehyung, guitar in hand, was effortlessly filling the space with a beautiful melody. Namjoon’s smile softened as he listened, his eyes briefly closing as he relaxed into the music.

“Tell him your taken,” you whisper, brushing your lips over his temple, convincing yourself that you were just playing your role.

Namjoon’s shoulders shook with a soft laugh as you whispered in his ear, the warmth of your breath sending a shiver down his spine. His eyes flickered up to meet yours, his expression both amused and tender. “I think he knows I’m taken,” he teased, his thumb brushing over your knuckles, as if grounding you both in this moment.

You smiled, the words lingering in the air for a heartbeat longer than necessary. Your heart raced, but it wasn't from the playful banter. It was the quiet reminder that even though you were pretending, this—this closeness, this connection—was something far more real than you had allowed yourself to admit.

Namjoon tilted his head slightly, his gaze softening as it met yours. “But just so you know,” he added, his voice low and teasing, “I’m not sharing my spot on the couch.”

You laughed quietly, settling further into his side, the warmth of his body against yours giving you a sense of peace that you hadn’t expected. “That’s fine. I’m going to go get another glass of wine. Do you want one?”

Namjoon’s hand gave yours a gentle squeeze as he leaned back, his eyes briefly fluttering closed. “Yeah, I'll take one,” he said, his voice relaxed but still playful. “But make sure you get something strong, ‘cause I’m pretty sure the boys are about to turn that guitar into a full-on concert.”

You giggle softly, standing up and threading your way to the kitchen. As you walked, you silently thanked whatever deity had smiled on you, allowing the evening to go so smoothly.

That is, until you turned the corner into the kitchen and froze, hearing your name called out loudly over the small crowd.

Before you could react, Meyong appeared from the crowd and wrapped you in a bear hug, squeezing all the air from your lungs.

“Wait—what the hell?” Meyong’s voice was loud, her words slightly slurred, and it only took a second before your mom-friend instincts kicked in. You cupped her flushed cheeks as she grinned up at you, her eyes full of excitement. “Oh my god, you’re here!”

“Meyong, hi,” you managed, trying not to panic.

“It’s so good to see you!” she mumbled the words happily, staring at you with that familiar starry-eyed admiration. The alcohol on her breath was evident, but you couldn’t help but smile at her infectious energy.

“It’s good to see you too,” you responded, returning the hug. But inside, your mind was racing. If Meyong was here, then Jin was probably somewhere in the mix, and that only meant one thing—this night was about to get tangled. This meant that there was no chance to avoid taking this home with you, because Meyong and Jin would undoubtedly tell absolutely everyone back home. You almost scolded yourself for forgetting the fact that your ex-roommates would also be visiting.

“When Hoseok said Joonie is bringing over a girl I just knew it was you,” she slurred sweetly, blinking affectionately at you

“And why is that?” you chuckled, trying to steer her away from the potential disaster of what she might say next as you unwrapped her hands from around you and gently pulled her toward the fridge to get her some water.

“Because you always had the fattest crush on Joonie.” She deadpanned. “Like, I knew you two were banging once you moved in together.”

“Oh my god Meyong! Keep your voice down!” you blushed furiously, quickly glancing around to make sure no one around heard your absurd conversation. This was exactly what you needed—your best friend, totally oblivious, blurting out something that could easily ruin the delicate balance you were pretending to maintain.

“Aww, Mrs. big shot lawyer is scared of talking about her feelings,” she giggled, taking the water bottle from you and twisting it. “So tell me? When did this all happen? And why didn’t you tell me you were fucking?”

You felt your heart skip a beat at her words, the colour rising in your cheeks in a way that felt downright painful. “Meyong, please, you’re making it worse,” you muttered, trying to keep your voice low while glancing around again, hoping no one was eavesdropping.

Her grin only widened as she took a long sip from the water bottle, totally oblivious to the chaos she was causing. “What? I’m just saying, it’s obvious you two are more than perfect for each other. How’s the sex?” her smile was almost wicked when she wriggled her eyebrows.

But then, as if a lightbulb went off in her head, her expression shifted, and her eyes widened in realization. “Oh! Jin owes me 100 bucks!” she said, as if everything made sense.

You blinked, a mixture of confusion and frustration flooding your system. “What?” you managed to get out, feeling like you were on the verge of losing your sanity. “Why does Jin owe you money?”

“We made a bet, he said there is no way Namjoon has the balls to confess to you, but I won!” She smiled, tacking on an unwarranted “Namjoon has balls!”

You stared at her, trying to process what she had just said. “Wait, hold on,” you said, your voice a mix of disbelief and embarrassment. “Jin bet against Namjoon confessing to me?”

Meyong nodded vigorously, clearly proud of herself, but before she could elaborate, Jin walked in.

“There you are,” his voice cut through the conversation, his face a mix of relief and amusement at the state his girlfriend was in, “I figured I’d find you here gossiping.” he looked directly at Meyong, carefully collecting her in his arms, keeping her steady.

“You owe me money,” she muttered looking up at him, completely undeterred by his shushing.

“Yeah, I figured,” he replied unamused. He carefully adjusted his grip on Meyong, who was swaying just slightly in his arms, looking utterly pleased with herself.

Jin’s eyes softened as he looked at you, his tone shifting slightly. “Just for the record, I just figured that since Namjoon never made a move when you first met, that it would never happen.”

Jin’s words hit you like a bolt of lightning. You blinked, trying to process what he’d just said, your mind racing with confusion and disbelief.

“Namjoon liked me?”

Just then the subject of your gossip session walked in, his warm hand gently squeezing your shoulder.

You turned quickly, almost startled, as Namjoon’s presence loomed behind you. His hand on your shoulder was steady, grounding, and yet there was an unmistakable tension in the air. He must’ve sensed something was off from the way you were standing, the way your eyes lingered on him, wide with surprise.

“Everything okay?” he asked softly, his gaze flicking between you and Jin, his voice a little too casual.

Before you could respond, Meyong, still blissfully unaware of the tension she’d stirred, grinned at Namjoon. “Okay, spill. You’re dating now?” Her tone was loud enough to catch the attention of the people around you, and you felt your cheeks heat instantly. “It’s new,” Namjoon said smoothly, the practiced ease of his response both reassuring and unnerving.

“New?!” Meyong repeated, letting out a laugh that was just a little too loud. She turned to Jin, “I told you! You owe me money!” She gave a bubbly giggle, “They’re idiots in love. What did I say, babe?”

“You said it every chance you got,” Jin said dryly, though he was clearly enjoying himself, his arm protectively wrapping around her waist. “For years.”

You groaned internally, shooting Namjoon a quick glance. He gave you a subtle nod, like he was silently reminding you to play along, that he will fix it all later.

“Well, it just made sense,” you then added, trying to steer the conversation into safer waters. “We work well together. That’s all.”

Meyong squinted at you, a mischievous smile tugging at her lips. “Oh, honey. That’s all?” She leaned closer, her voice dropping to a stage whisper. “You telling me you’ve been sharing an apartment with him and you haven’t been climbing him like a Christmas tree every chance you got? I see the hickeys!”

You allowed yourself a second to cuss out Namjoon in your mind, trying your best not to let your face drop too dramatically.

“Meyong,” you hissed, mortified, your face burning as you felt Namjoon laugh besides you, acutely aware of his hand that found its way to your hip, pulling you into his side.

“What?” she said innocently, though her grin only widened. “I’m just saying, if I’d been living with Jin before we got together...”

“Okay!” Jin interjected, raising his hands like a referee calling for a timeout. “Let’s not traumatize our friends tonight.”

“Oh baby, we can tell them about the sex book!”

You felt your entire body flush, unable to hide the growing heat in your cheeks. “Meyong, stop!” you managed to stammer, looking desperately around the room for a distraction, but it was clear that nothing could save you now. Namjoon, however, only chuckled softly, his hand resting casually on your hip as if he were fully aware of the storm he had just inadvertently stirred up.

Meyong's grin grew impossibly wider as she wiggled her eyebrows at you. “What? It's not like we're all virgins here. We know what’s going on behind closed doors.”

“Please, for the love of all things holy,” you muttered, half laughing, half mortified.

Jin, clearly amused but still calm, gave you a reassuring smile. “You don’t have to listen to her. She’s been drinking, and her filter is long gone by now.”

Namjoon’s chuckle rumbled beside you, and he gave your hip a playful squeeze. “Don’t worry,” he said in a low, teasing voice, “She’s just excited to be part of the gossip.”

“Yeah, thanks for the water, it was nice seeing you guys,” It was almost as if Jin could sense the awkwardness clinging to you, and he lovingly tried to maneuver his girlfriend towards a seat, but she twisted in his arms,

“Babe, but the book!”

Jin shook his head with a bemused smile, clearly used to this side of Meyong, taking her hands and wrapping them around his neck as they walked. “We’ll talk about the book later,” he said calmly, gently pulling her along to the couch before she could launch into any more embarrassing details about their private life.

You let out a breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding, the tension slowly melting from your shoulders. Glancing over at Namjoon, you half expected him to wear that casual smile of his, but instead, you were met with an almost sombre look, as if that conversation took the same toll on him.

“About that strong drink,” his eyes avoided yours, and before you could respond, he reached for a bottle of whiskey on the counter, his hand pausing midair as if he was weighing the situation. He let out a soft, almost imperceptible sigh before grabbing the bottle and pouring himself a generous amount into a glass.

You tilted your head slightly, watching him carefully. There was something in his movements, a shift you hadn’t expected, and it made you wonder if the playful atmosphere had affected him more than he let on.

“Are you okay?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper, your heart racing as you stood beside him. Your fingers grazed the edge of his glass as you instinctively reached out to steady it.

Namjoon gave a fleeting smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. He took a long gulp from his glass, his gaze briefly shifting away. “Yeah,” he replied, though the word lacked conviction, like he was trying to convince himself just as much as you.

Your hand found his, your thumb tracing over his knuckles gently. His words hung in the air, and something in the way he said them made your chest tighten, an uncomfortable feeling settling between you two.

He finally met your gaze, and in that moment, it was as if everything else around you disappeared. The music, the laughter, the chatter—none of it mattered. It was just the two of you standing there, caught in the quiet space between words. He parted his lips, like he was on the verge of saying something, but then he faltered, swallowing hard instead and finishing his drink in one long, steady pull.

The silence stretched between you both, heavy and thick, but neither of you moved. You could feel the weight of his emotions, even though he hadn’t said a word. It was in the way he held himself, the way his fingers tightened around his glass before he set it down on the counter with a quiet clink.

“I-” Namjoon began, but then he stopped, shaking his head slightly, as if he wasn’t sure where to start. “I think I need some air.”

You nodded, understanding more than he could probably know. “Okay,” you said softly, your thumb brushing over the back of his hand one more time before you let go.

Namjoon gave you a small, almost imperceptible nod, his shoulders lifting in a resigned breath before he stepped past you and toward the door leading out to the balcony. You watched him for a moment, chewing your lip as a million different thoughts unleashed in your mind. Maybe this was it—the moment that he realized everything had been a mistake. It wasn’t like he hadn’t been aware of the consequences so far. But perhaps now he regretted ever asking you to come along, regretted just how big the lie you spun has gotten, how it was now seeping back into your day-to-day life back home.

You lingered for a while, lost in the muddle of your thoughts, trying to steady the whirlwind in your chest. Minutes passed, but nothing seemed to quiet your restless mind. Pouring yourself a glass of wine offered only a fleeting sense of calm—kike standing in the eye of a hurricane while the chaos swirled just out of grasp.

Finally, after about fifteen minutes, you grabbed a water bottle—a little gesture that somehow cemented your resolve. You reminded yourself that this was simply what a good friend would do, and with that thought, you headed towards the balcony.

As you reached the door, you hesitated for just a second, unsure if you should interrupt the space he had taken for himself. But the thought of leaving him alone, unsure, and potentially unravelling further without you there, spurred you forward.

You stepped outside quietly, the cold air hitting your face and clearing your mind.

Namjoon was leaning against the railing, eyes staring out at the city lights, distant and lost in thought. His posture was tense, his body language closed off, like he was carrying the weight of something heavy.

Taking a slow breath, you walked up beside him, offering the water bottle as a simple gesture. “Thought you might need this,” you said gently, your voice soft against the backdrop of the night.

Namjoon glanced at you, a brief flicker of something in his eyes before he looked back out at the view. His hand hovered over the bottle, but he didn’t take it immediately. The silence between you two felt thick, but you weren’t in a rush for him to fill it with words.

The faint blush across his cheeks was still evident even in the cold air, and being this close, you could catch the scent of spiced wine and whiskey on his breath. Maybe that was why you didn’t question it—his intentions—when he leaned in ever so slightly, caging you against the railing of the balcony. His eyes searched yours, his lips tantalizingly close, the space between you evaporating as his breath brushed against your skin.

Your fingers gripped the cold metal of the railing, grounding yourself as the city lights blurred behind him, their brightness eclipsed by the intensity of his gaze.

“I really want to kiss you right now.” He said softly, his voice low and almost reverent, as if even voicing the thought would break the spell.

You let out a breathy laugh, a huff of exasperation you couldn’t quite contain. “Namjoon,” you said, barely above a whisper. “There’s no one around.”

The words should have been a reason to stop, to call this what it was: a charade, a performance. But instead, his lips curved into the faintest of smiles, his eyes shimmering with something you couldn’t name.

“I know,” he murmured. His lips hovered just above yours, his breath mingling with yours in the chilled air, reminding you just how intoxicated you both were.

For a heartbeat, he froze, as though waiting for you to stop him.

But you didn’t.

The kiss was soft at first, a tentative exploration, as though he was waiting for you to pull away. But when you didn’t, when you leaned into him, he pressed harder, more insistent. It wasn’t just a kiss—it was the shattering of every barrier you’d built, the collapse of all your carefully laid plans to keep this friendship intact, to keep it fake.

Your hands found his chest, clutching at the fabric of his sweater as his moved to cup your face, tilting you closer like you were something precious. His thumb brushed over your cheekbone, sending shivers down your spine as he deepened the kiss, his resolve crumbling as fast as yours.

He left you breathless, every nerve in your body alight, your chest rising and falling in sync with his. The warmth of his forehead against yours grounded you for a moment, as if the world had tilted on its axis, the alcohol in your blood suddenly going to your head, and this was the only thing holding you steady.

His forehead stayed pressed against yours, his breath shaky when he pulled back. You stood there, still reeling from the kiss, your heart pounding in your chest as his breath mingled with yours. The warmth of his forehead against yours felt like the only anchor in a sea of confusion. You weren’t sure if you were both still caught up in the intoxication of the night, the wine and whiskey blurring your sense of reality, or if there was something deeper at play.

But then he spoke, voice raw, hoarse, like the word scraped out of his throat, and cut through the haze.

“Fuck.”

It was the kind of word that felt like a confession, like a moment of clarity in the middle of chaos. And as much as you wanted to believe it was just a slip, a fleeting moment brought on by alcohol and the weight of your shared history, something deep inside you couldn't shake the feeling that it was more than that.

You pulled back slightly, your hands still resting against his chest, feeling the rapid beat of his heart beneath your fingertips. His eyes were wide, almost panicked, searching yours as if looking for something—anything—that would make this make sense. But nothing did. Not the kiss, not his reaction, and certainly not the way your heart refused to calm down.

This had been a mistake, hadn’t it?

A drunken mistake. A slip. And now, standing in the aftermath, you couldn't tell whether you were relieved or devastated.

His lips parted like he was going to say something, but then the words fell short. Instead, he ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head slightly, as if trying to clear the fog that had settled over him.

“I… I didn’t mean to… I don’t know what I was thinking,” Namjoon muttered, his voice thick with frustration.

You swallowed hard, your hands still gripping his sweater as you tried to make sense of it all. “Neither did I.”

The weight of the moment hung heavy between you, both of you searching for an explanation, but finding absolutely none.

#namjoon x reader #namjoon x you #bts smut #namjoon imagine #namjoon scenarios #namjoon smut #bts x fem!reader #bts x reader #bts x y/n #bts x you #the holiday pretense

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iliketopgun · 3 months ago

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hi, my darling!! can i request “You getting so flustered is one of the cutest things I’ve ever seen.” with evan buckley?

i have been obsessed with him for so long (lmao as if it isn't obvious-) and i NEED more of him!!

"Honey Honey!"

Can I kiss your brain? I love this!!!!

🩷 "Nuestra Canción" send me some cute fluff prompts for characters that I write, x reader or my OCs are allowed.

Word count: 560

The prompt: "You getting flustered is one of the cutest things I've ever seen."

A/N: Never written for x reader before so here goes nothing. Legitimately don't know where this came from, deviated a bit from the prompt btw, I had a lot of fun writing this!

Warnings: female!reader, tooth rotting fluff, I totally didn't have Mamma Mia! on repeat while writing this (I'm lying so much), domesticity, curls are here, reader is a part of the 118, a curse word or two, Buck and reader live together, Buck calls his S/O "Baby" and other pet names, Buck is shirtless (yes, suffer), reader's favorite food is grilled cheese (if it's not, I'm sorry), kissing does happen, not beta read

Banner belongs to @/cafekitsune

Do not repost anywhere else or use it to train AI! This is my work! My own brain created this. Don't be a plagiarizer!

Here we go! Safe under the cut!

Buck could've sworn he was the luckiest son of a bitch in the whole world. His girlfriend was insanely good looking. And her music taste was impeccable. Buck could stare at her all day and never grow tired of her. Yeah, to say he was down bad was a major understatement. But who could blame him, when you looked like a goddess?

Buck was making dinner when you came in from a shift at the 118, it had been a simple 12 hour overtime shift for some extra money, but it had been so uneventful, it took a toll on you. The utter anxiety for the bell that never rang that entire shift. You kick off your work boots by the door, putting your keys in the dish by the door and putting your bag on the floor, you'll get it later. You unbutton your uniform shirt and tug it off, leaving you in a white undershirt. "I'm home!" You call out as you walk into the kitchen of the loft, watching your boyfriend cook. Buck turns around, in your tiredness, you didn't notice that Buck was shirtless and he hadn't gelled his curls back. Was he trying to kill you? Well even if he was you were sure, you'd die really happy. "Oh, hey baby, I'm making your favorite. Grilled cheese." Buck says with a smile, it was adorable. So attentive. "Mmmm, I love you. You're the best." You tell him with as much appreciation you could muster. Your nerves were shot to hell and you just wanted to eat and sleep. Buck takes notice of this and guides you to the couch, wraps you in a blanket and walks to the kitchen, leaving you confused. "Buck? What are you doing?" You ask between a laugh. Buck puts the grilled cheese on a plate and comes back into the living room with the plate and hands it to you. "Eat. Wanna watch Mamma Mia?" Buck asks you, knowing it was one of your favorites. You nod as you bite into the grilled cheese, moaning in appreciation. Buck smiles at you and kisses your forehead. Buck puts the movie on and sits beside you on the couch, placing you in his lap and cuddling you. He was like a personal space heater. But right now you don't care about anything except food and Buck. The movie starts and you finish your food up after a few minutes. You get up and place your dirty dishes in the dishwasher before running up the loft stairs to grab your pajamas. You were walking down the stairs while adjusting your Buck's shirt when the beach scene came on. No matter how many times you watched it, it still made you flush like a little girl. Buck picks up on that. "Are you blushing?" He teases and "N-no!" You stammer, before playfully tossing a pillow at him. "You wound me, darling!" Buck says dramatically while holding his hand over his heart. "Oh shush, you're fine. Plus you deserve it for walking around shirtless!" You reply before walking towards him. "You getting flustered is probably the cutest thing I've ever seen." Buck says as you stand in between his legs while he looks at you with those cerulean blue eyes and you try not to melt. "Oh shut up, Buckley!" You tell him before kissing him.

The end!

I hope you enjoyed it!

#morghen's mutuals #🩷nuestra canción #iliketopgun's 100 followers event #evan buckley x reader #fluff prompts #evan buckley fluff #911 show #911 #9 1 1 x reader #x reader #evan buckley imagine #my work #iliketopgunwrites

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lilbardrhi · 1 month ago

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"Broken", Not Stupid - 4: There Are Worse Options

Pairing: alpha!Simon "Ghost" Riley x unusual omega!OC (13)

CW: Omegaverse; cult-like situation; dehumanization

Author's Note: I can't stop. Oops. If you want to be on the tag list, drop a comment to let me know <3 Also, I feel the need to warn you that CoD fic is what got me into Omegaverse and this is the first time I've written it lol

Thirteen hours.

It took thirteen hours for the paperwork to be filled out and processed. They'd dragged Simon off immediately to fill out the paperwork and I was "escourted" (dragged) to my space to wait.

The last thirteen hours have been spent with staff members pampering me. Bathing me, doing my hair and makeup, dressing me in clothes that aren't Salvation's omega dresscode - all of it. There was even something of a literal photoshoot?

I don't know why they needed photos of me, but I always knew these people were weird.

However, all of that lead to me being prettily posed in the room they keep omegas in while they wait for their new alphas to arrive. Specifically at 10:30 pm. I almost want to shoot Simon for the insistence of immediate pick-up.

Could be asleep by now.

A knock at the door pulls me from my whirlwind of thoughts and I sit up straighter, putting on my best "submissive omega" impression for whoever enters.

"UK-009-0013? Your alpha has arrived," an employee calls from the other side of the door.

I stand quickly and tug gently at the way-too-big black skull tshirt that they ended up putting me in at some point.

"Come in."

The door creaks open and reveals Jenny - who looks way too happy - and Simon.

"There she is, sir. In the clothes you dropped off, as you requested," Jenny says a bit too proudly.

"I can see that."

I have to suppress my laugh at the look of hurt on Jenny's face at Simon's lack of praise. Instead, I continue my "submissive omega" act and begin fidgeting with the edge of the tshirt while looking up at Simon through my lashes. The more smitten I appear the better.

"Simon," I call to him softly, meekly.

He wastes no time crossing the room and scooping me into his arms at the sound of my voice. My arms wrap tightly around him and I grab fistfuls of the back of his hoodie.

"Anyway you can tone that shit down a bit?" he whispers into my ear, voice a bit strained.

"Not if you want any chance of getting me out of here without roadblocks," I whisper back with my face burried against his neck. "Don't make it weird."

I'm acting, to him, like I'm unphased by having an alpha but the seemingly-dormant omega portion of my brain seems to be waking up. She's still drowsy and unsure what's happening, but with my face shoved against his neck...

I can smell him.

I've never been this close, physically, to any alpha before. The fact that doing so is triggering the omega part of my brain is royally pissing me off. Thankfully, Simon loosens his grip on me and steps back. One of his hands drops to mine, his fingers lacing through mine.

"Everything is settled. Correct?" Simon addresses Jenny agan as he turns. "I'd like to take my future mate home now."

My cheeks warm slightly at the comment and the implications, but I remind myself that it's part of the act to get me (and hopefully other omegas) out of Salvation's grasp.

"Of course! Everything is settled and you're both free to go." Jenny's smile is unsettling, as per usual, but so is her choice in wording. It's clear from the way Simon's grip tightens around my hand that he also finds it strange. However, as promised, we are allowed to leave with no problems.

As soon as we're out of view of the property, I feel my entire body relax. My muscles ache from being tense for so long - literal years - and I'm tearing up out of relief.

Bless Simon, though. If he noticed my change in demeanor, he didn't comment or react.

"Are these... your clothes?" I ask once I manage to force the tears back.

He stays quiet for so long I start to think he didn't even hear me.

"Would it bother you if I said yes?"

Not... the response I was expecting, but alright.

"Not really, no. It'd be expected. Giving me things with your scent and all that." I toy with the strings on the sweatpants. They're long and hang low from how tightly I had to tie them to get the pants to stay up.

"This, whatever it is, doesn't have to be like that." His voice is gentle, unlike what it has been 99% of the time. Even when we were playing our parts to get me out of there there was a mostly gruff, gravely tone to his voice. I glance at him, confused as all hell, but his eyes are trained on the road.

"Didn't you go to Salvation to find an omega? A mate?"

"Yeah, I guess," he shrugs, eyes forward still. "But there are more important things in the world than finding a mate and reproducing for the sake of having a mate and reproducing. Like rights and safety. Especially that of omegas."

The omega in my mind seems sad at his offer and point of view of our situation, but I couldn't be happier. Salvation is not what it implies and I knew I would never get out of there or be able to help my fellow omegas while stuck in their grasp.

An alpha who seems to actually care about the wellbeing of others. Even if he is a bit... odd.

Things could be worse. A lot worse.

Masterlist | CoD Masterlist | Part One

Tag List: @lucienofthelakes @lostintransist @demothers-empty-blog @scaredyspooks

#rhi writes #bns

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rispwr · 4 months ago

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If i were you i'd do me - JK - MDNI - 6

pairings : fuckboy! jk x fem! reader, established relationship, mentions of smart! namjoon x oc, slow burn, enemies to lovers

contents/warnings : smut, rejection, new character apearances, car sex, semi public sex, implied sex, smut, jealousy, i think that's all. let me know if i missed any

taglist : comment if you wanna be added to my taglists) @crazyovayou @minghaosimp @pitchblack0309 @kpopsmutty69 @ririkookiemonster

word count: 6k words, kinda short

context : Jungkook, the notorious campus heartbreaker and player, unexpectedly becomes your groupmate alongside Namjoon, the guy you’ve secretly admired for ages. However, it seems your feelings have started shifting from Namjoon to someone else entirely unexpected…

Not proofread

The days had started to blur together ever since that revelation. Two weeks had passed, and the heaviness of everything still lingered. Hoseok had been distant—he hadn't visited our house at all. It was understandable, given the circumstances. Finding out that the woman who raised you wasn't your real mother and that your entire past had been a lie was more than anyone should have to deal with.

Mom and I tried our best to comfort him, but he was in his own world. Instead of Hoseok coming to us, Mom and I had taken to visiting him at his place. It was our way of making sure he knew he wasn't alone, that we were still his family, no matter what.

This morning was no different. "Ready to go, Y/N?" Mom called out from the front door.

I grabbed my jacket and met her downstairs. "Yeah, let's head out."

As we drove to Hoseok's place, I couldn't help but feel the weight of it all. Hoseok had always been a light in my life—his positivity and energy were infectious. But now, things felt different. He'd withdrawn, barely speaking when we visited him. I just hoped today would be better.

When we arrived at his apartment, I took a deep breath before knocking on the door. Mom and I exchanged hopeful glances as we slightly opened the door.

As we walked inside, the familiar coziness of his apartment greeted us. The place had always been filled with life—plants, art, music—but lately, it felt quieter, more somber. Hoseok had been spending most of his time in his room, avoiding the common areas as much as possible.

Mom and I exchanged another glance before walking toward his room, hoping to pull him out of whatever funk he was in. "Maybe we can cheer him up a little," I whispered to her.

"Let's hope so," Mom whispered back, her voice laced with concern.

When we reached his bedroom door, we could hear muffled voices inside. I raised an eyebrow, curious. "Is someone else here?" I asked, turning to Mom.

"I don't know," she replied, equally puzzled. "Maybe he's on the phone?"

We both stood there for a moment, debating whether to knock or just barge in. In the end, Mom knocked softly. "Hobi, we're coming in, okay?" she said.

But there was no response, just more muffled sounds, now a bit more frantic.

My curiosity got the better of me. I gently pushed the door open, and—

Chaos.

The door swung open, and the sight before us was not what I had expected. At all.

There, in the middle of the bed, was Hoseok. With Yoongi. Doing it.

Time seemed to freeze as my brain tried to catch up with what my eyes were seeing. Hoseok's eyes went wide with pure panic, and Yoongi let out a high-pitched yelp. Both of them scrambled to grab the blankets, desperately trying to cover themselves.

"Oh my GOD! What the—WHAT THE HELL!" I screamed, my voice mixing with my mom's equally shocked shrieks.

"OH MY GOD, MOM!" Hoseok screamed back, his face as red as a tomato as he tried to bury himself under the blanket, utterly mortified. "W-WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!"

"We—we didn't know—OH MY GOD!" My mom squealed, her hands covering her face. "We didn't see anything—well, actually, we did, but OH MY GOD!"

Yoongi looked like he wanted to crawl under the bed and disappear. "This is—this is not what it looks like!" he tried to stammer, even though it was exactly what it looked like.

I grabbed my mom's hand and yanked her out of the room, slamming the door behind us. Both of us stood there in the hallway, eyes wide, hearts pounding.

"What. Just. Happened?" I gasped, trying to catch my breath.

Mom stood there, just as stunned as I was. "Did we just walk in on your brother and Yoongi?"

"Yes. Yes, we did," I replied, feeling like the entire world had tilted on its axis.

We made our way to the living room and collapsed on the couch, still in shock. There was a long, uncomfortable silence before I finally broke it.

"I can't believe it," I muttered, shaking my head in disbelief. "Yoongi? With Hoseok?"

"Of all the people..." Mom murmured, her hands still trembling. "I didn't even know Yoongi was—well, I didn't know he was interested in men, let alone your brother!"

"I mean... I guess I never really thought about it," I said, my mind still trying to process the bombshell we'd just walked in on. "But Yoongi? And Hoseok? What are the odds?"

Mom let out a breathless laugh, still dazed by the situation. "I guess we all have our secrets."

An hour later...

After what felt like an eternity of sitting in awkward silence, I heard the creak of Hoseok's bedroom door opening. I glanced toward the hallway, where Hoseok and Yoongi appeared, both looking sheepish and extremely embarrassed.

Hoseok was the first to speak. "I... uh... I'm sorry you had to see that." He couldn't even look at us, his eyes fixed firmly on the floor.

Yoongi, standing behind him, nodded quickly. "Yeah, that was... not how we wanted you to find out."

Mom, to her credit, had managed to compose herself somewhat. She cleared her throat and smiled awkwardly. "Well, I suppose we should have knocked first. That's on us."

I nodded in agreement, though I could still feel my face burning with embarrassment. "Yeah, sorry about that."

There was another awkward pause before Hoseok finally looked up, his face still flushed. "I guess this is as good a time as any to tell you guys. Yoongi and I... we've been seeing each other for a few months now."

That revelation hit like a ton of bricks. "Wait, months?!" I blurted out, my eyes widening. "How did I not know about this?"

"We were keeping it quiet," Yoongi said, scratching the back of his head, clearly uncomfortable. "We didn't want to make things weird, especially with everything that's been going on with Hoseok and his... family stuff."

I glanced at Hoseok, who nodded. "Yeah, I didn't want to add more to the pile of crazy. But... Yoongi's been there for me through everything. I don't know what I would've done without him."

The sincerity in his voice made my heart soften. As much as I was shocked by the whole situation, I could see the love and support they had for each other. It wasn't just some random fling—they really cared about each other.

Mom, who had been unusually quiet, finally spoke up. "Well, Hoseok, I'm just glad you have someone who's there for you," she said gently. "We want you to be happy, and if Yoongi makes you happy, then that's all that matters."

Hoseok's face brightened a little, relief flooding his features. "Thanks, Mom. That means a lot."

I nodded, trying to wrap my head around the situation. "Yeah, I mean, I'm still processing the whole... uh, scene we walked in on, but... I'm glad you have someone who cares about you."

Hoseok let out a small laugh, his cheeks still pink. "Yeah, sorry about that. Definitely not how we wanted to break the news."

Yoongi smirked, a hint of his usual confidence returning. "Well, at least now we don't have to hide it anymore."

I laughed along with them, the tension finally breaking. "Yeah, but maybe next time, lock the door?"

"Noted," Hoseok replied with a sheepish grin.

Later that evening...

I stood in front of my house, my thoughts were already on the evening ahead. Jungkook had texted me earlier, asking if he could come over, and I'd agreed. It had been a while since we spent any real time together, especially with everything going on in my life.

I unlocked the door, stepping inside as the familiar warmth of home enveloped me. The scent of something cooking drifted from the kitchen—Mom was always up to something, keeping herself busy. I texted Jungkook to let him know I was home, and soon enough, I heard a knock at the door.

When I opened it, there he stood, leaning casually against the frame with that signature grin of his. "Hey," he said, his voice low and teasing.

"Hey yourself," I replied, stepping aside to let him in.

We barely made it to the living room when my mom's voice called out from the kitchen. "Oh, Jungkook! Is that you?" she asked, peeking around the corner with a smile.

Jungkook offered a polite bow, looking slightly embarrassed by the attention. "Yes, it's me, Mrs. kim. How are you?"

"Oh, I'm good, dear. How about you? Still causing trouble on campus?" she teased, knowing full well the rumors about his reputation.

Jungkook chuckled softly, rubbing the back of his neck. "Not as much trouble anymore, I promise."

I rolled my eyes and nudged him playfully. "Yeah, sure. He's a good boy now, right?"

Mom gave us both a knowing smile, clearly amused. "Well, that's good to hear. It's about time, isn't it?"

"Mom!" I groaned, shooting her a look as Jungkook's cheeks tinged with pink.

Before she could say anything else embarrassing, I grabbed Jungkook's arm. "We're going upstairs, okay?"

"Uh-huh," Mom replied, but just as we turned to head up, her voice rang out again. "I'm sure you have an IUD, right?"

My eyes went wide in horror. "Shut up, Mom!" I yelled, my face burning as I dragged Jungkook up the stairs with me.

Behind us, I could hear her laughing to herself. "Just saying!" she called after us.

When we finally reached my room, I closed the door behind us, leaning against it for a moment, trying to shake off the embarrassment. Jungkook, meanwhile, was grinning like a Cheshire cat, clearly entertained by the whole situation.

"Your mom's hilarious," he said, dropping down onto my bed with a sigh.

I gave him a mock glare. "Yeah, well, I have to deal with her all the time, so trust me, it's not as funny from my end."

Jungkook just chuckled, patting the space beside him on the bed. "Come here."

I rolled my eyes but joined him, stretching out beside him as we settled in comfortably. The familiar ease between us took over, and for a while, we just lay there in silence, listening to the faint sounds of the house around us.

Then I felt his eyes on me.

I turned my head to look at him, and there he was—those big, doe-like eyes staring at me with a softness that made my heart skip a beat. Jungkook had this way of looking at me, like I was the only person in the world. It was impossible to resist.

I groaned, playfully smacking his arm. "What do you want?"

He blinked, feigning innocence. "What? I can't just look at my girlfriend?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Uh-huh, sure. Spill it, Jungkook. What are you up to?"

He hesitated for a second, then smiled sheepishly. "Okay, so... there's this party tonight."

I groaned inwardly. "A party? Really?"

He pouted, leaning closer. "Come on, it'll be fun. Can you come with me?"

I sighed, giving him a look. "Can't you just go by yourself? You don't need me there."

"Nooo," he whined, scooting closer until his head was practically on my shoulder. "I wanna be with my girlfriend."

The way he said it made my heart flutter, but I wasn't going to give in that easily. I turned to face him, narrowing my eyes. "You don't want to let people know that the infamous campus fuckboy Jeon Jungkook is actually a baby when he's with me, do you?"

He huffed indignantly. "I'm not a fuckboy."

I raised an eyebrow, clearly not convinced. "Oh? Then what are you?"

He leaned in closer, his voice dropping to a soft, serious tone. "I'm your boyfriend."

His words sent a wave of warmth through me, making my cheeks flush. I hated how easily he could get to me like this, how one simple sentence from him could make my heart race. I looked away, pretending to be unaffected. "Fine, fine. I'll go with you," I muttered.

Jungkook grinned triumphantly. "Really?"

"Yeah," I said, still avoiding his gaze. "But only if Sora can come too."

"Sora?" he asked, confusion flickering across his face. "I have no idea who that is, but... okay, sure."

I smiled, leaning in to press a quick kiss to his cheek. "Great."

Jungkook gave me a curious look but didn't push it. Instead, he wrapped his arm around me, pulling me closer until I was tucked against his side. "Thanks for agreeing to come. It'll be fun, I promise."

"Uh-huh," I mumbled, resting my head against his chest. "You better be right."

Later that evening...

We had spent the rest of the afternoon lounging around, talking about random things and just enjoying each other's company. As the evening approached, I reluctantly started getting ready for the party. Jungkook, of course, was no help—he just lay on my bed, watching me with amusement as I tried on different outfits.

"You know," he said, his voice teasing, "you could wear a garbage bag, and you'd still look hot."

I shot him a look. "That's not helpful, Jungkook."

He laughed, sitting up. "Okay, fine. How about this?" He pointed to the outfit I had on— a really cute red lacy dress, hugging my curves nicely.

I glanced at myself in the mirror. It wasn't fancy, but it was comfortable, and that was all I really cared about. "Yeah, this works."

Jungkook grinned, hopping off the bed and coming up behind me. He wrapped his arms around my waist, resting his chin on my shoulder as he looked at our reflection. "You look amazing," he murmured.

I smiled, leaning back into his embrace. "Thanks."

After a few more minutes of last-minute adjustments, we were finally ready to go. As we headed downstairs, I mentally prepared myself for whatever chaos this party was going to bring. With Jungkook, you never really knew what to expect.

When we reached the bottom of the stairs, Mom was waiting by the door, clearly still amused by our earlier interaction. "Going out, I see," she said, her tone playful.

"Yeah," I replied, grabbing my jacket. "We're heading to a party."

Mom raised an eyebrow. "Behave yourselves, okay?"

I groaned. "Mom, seriously. We'll be fine."

She just laughed, giving Jungkook a wink. "Take care of my daughter, Jungkook."

He smiled politely, nodding. "Of course, Mrs. kim. I always do."

With that, we finally made our way out the door and into the cool evening air. As we walked to Jungkook's car, he reached for my hand, lacing his fingers through mine. It was a small gesture, but it made my heart swell.

"So," I said, glancing at him. "What kind of party is this, anyway?"

Jungkook shrugged. "Just a casual one. A few friends, some drinks, music. Nothing crazy."

I raised an eyebrow, clearly skeptical. "Uh-huh. I'll believe that when I see it."

He laughed, squeezing my hand. "Trust me, you'll have a good time."

on the way to the party.

"Baby, if ever you don't wanna be here anymore, just tell me, hm?" he said, glancing over at me with a tender look in his eyes. His concern was so endearing that I couldn't help but smile softly at him.

"Okay," I nodded, feeling reassured by his protective tone. Jungkook was so different with me, softer, caring. It still caught me off guard sometimes, given his infamous campus reputation.

Soon, we arrived at the party. As we pulled up, it was clear that the night was already in full swing. The chaos hit us even before we got out of the car—music blaring, people dancing wildly, and the unmistakable scent of alcohol hung in the air. I could already tell that half of the partygoers were drunk.

Jungkook stepped out first, rushing to my side to open the door for me, always the gentleman, even at a place like this. I took his hand as he led me through the crowd, his grip firm and protective. Just as we made it through the packed entrance, I spotted Sora, one of my closest friends.

"GIRLYYYY!" I squealed, rushing over to hug her tightly. It had been a while since I last saw her, and seeing her at the party immediately made everything feel lighter. Her energy was contagious.

Sora hugged me back, spinning me around dramatically before pulling away, her eyes landing on Jungkook. She scrunched up her nose in mock disgust and leaned in closer to me, lowering her voice to a conspiratorial whisper, "Is that the infamous Jeon Jungkook who has fucked every girl on campus?"

I winced, knowing Jungkook heard that. "Yeah, he's my boyfriend," I whispered back, feeling the heat rise to my cheeks. There was something so ironic about the whole situation—everyone on campus thought they knew who Jungkook was, but the boy I knew was completely different.

Sora's eyes widened in disbelief, her mouth agape. "Girl, how the hell did HE pull YOU???" she exclaimed a bit too loudly.

I heard Jungkook clear his throat behind us. "Excuse me, I can hear you," he said, trying to sound serious, but the playful smirk on his lips gave him away. He wasn't mad—more amused, if anything. I turned around to see him crossing his arms over his chest, pretending to act offended.

Before I could respond, a group of guys approached us—Jungkook's friends, as I quickly recognized them. Jimin, Taehyung, and Mingyu were all grinning widely as they came up to us, clearly enjoying the chaos of the party.

"Hey bro—oh, who's this pretty lady you're with?" Mingyu asked, giving me a once-over with a playful grin. I knew instantly he was teasing, but Jungkook's arm tightened around my waist possessively.

"Don't even think about it, Gyu. She's my girlfriend," Jungkook declared, his tone light but firm. His friends laughed, but the look in their eyes showed they knew better than to challenge him.

Jimin nudged me gently. "Tell us if he hurts you, Y/N. We'll back you up," he said with an exaggerated serious expression, clearly joking, though I could tell there was a hint of genuine care behind his words.

Taehyung joined in, putting his arm around Jungkook. "Hey, hey, you're forgetting you guys are my friends too!" Jungkook laughed, shaking his head as his friends continued to tease him.

The party was in full swing. People were scattered everywhere—some dancing wildly, some slouched on couches deep in conversation, and others already passed out from drinking. I was mingling with Jungkook and his friends, the warmth of his presence at my side keeping me grounded amidst the madness.

But Sora, my ever-lively best friend, had shoo'd me away. I could still see her from where I stood, sitting on the couch by herself, a drink in hand, the picture of contented solitude. I knew she didn't want to feel like a third wheel, and in her usual carefree manner, she seemed to enjoy her own company for the time being.

As Jungkook talked to Taehyung and Mingyu, I caught sight of Namjoon walking towards Sora. My heart did a small, familiar flip. There was a time when I'd had a crush on Namjoon, and while those feelings had long since faded, the sight of him still gave me a strange sense of nostalgia.

Namjoon, always composed, always so cool, sat down next to Sora, a gentle smile on his lips as he greeted her. "You alright, pretty?" he asked, his deep voice carrying over the music.

Sora looked up, a little surprised to see him, but she quickly gave him a smile in return. "Hi," she said, taking a sip from her drink.

Namjoon leaned back on the couch, his body language open and relaxed. "What's up?" he asked, his eyes flicking over her face with mild concern. He had a way of reading people, always tuned into the little details.

Sora sighed, twirling the straw in her drink lazily. "Just bored. Shoo'd Y/N and Jungkook alone 'cause I didn't wanna be a third wheel," she explained with a slight eye roll.

Namjoon's smile widened, his dimple appearing. "Wanna change that?" he asked, a teasing glint in his eyes. Before Sora could answer, someone came over and interrupted their conversation.

"Hey! We're about to play spin the bottle!" the guy announced excitedly, clearly already a little tipsy. He was gesturing to a group forming in the middle of the living room. "You guys in?"

Sora didn't even hesitate. Her eyes lit up with excitement as she grabbed Namjoon by the arm, dragging him towards the circle before he could protest. "Come on, let's go!"

Namjoon glanced over at me, his expression one of mild amusement as Sora pulled him into the game. I gave him a small wave and a smile before returning to my conversation with Jungkook, who was blissfully unaware of the little interaction happening just a few feet away.

But my mind kept drifting back to the game. Spin the bottle always had a way of bringing unexpected drama, and as much as I tried to focus on the conversation in front of me, I couldn't help but feel a little nervous. What if Sora ended up with Jungkook? I trusted her, of course, but it would definitely make things awkward, especially since Sora didn't know about my past crush on Namjoon. The situation felt like a ticking time bomb, and I silently hoped for the best.

As the game progressed, I glanced over at the group every now and then. People were spinning the bottle, laughing, and occasionally disappearing into various rooms for the infamous "7 minutes in heaven." Sora seemed to be enjoying herself, laughing with Namjoon, who looked more relaxed than I'd ever seen him at a party.

Then, it was Sora's turn.

My heart skipped a beat as she leaned forward to spin the bottle. The room seemed to quiet down, everyone watching as the bottle made its slow, torturous rotation on the floor. My eyes followed its every move, dread building in my chest as it spun closer and closer to Jungkook.

Please, not Jungkook, I silently begged.

The bottle slowed, inching its way past Jungkook and landing squarely on... Namjoon.

Relief flooded through me, I watched as Sora turned to look at Namjoon, her eyes wide with surprise but quickly morphing into a playful grin. Namjoon raised an eyebrow, glancing at me briefly before standing up. He shot me a small, reassuring smile, though I wasn't sure why he felt the need to comfort me.

"The third bedroom to the right!" one of the guys yelled, his voice cutting through the room's din. The crowd cheered as Sora stood up, grabbing Namjoon's hand and dragging him toward the stairs with a laugh.

my eyes dragged as i watched them disappearing up the stairs together. There was something surreal about it—seeing my best friend and the guy I used to like head off for "20 minutes in heaven." I wasn't sure how to feel, but I did my best to shrug it off. Sora didn't know about my old crush, and Namjoon was just a friend now. There was no reason to be upset.

I turned my attention back to Jungkook, who had noticed my distracted state. He leaned in, his breath warm against my ear as he whispered, "You okay?"

I nodded quickly, forcing a smile. "Yeah, just... thinking about sora"

He smirked, clearly amused. "Worried about Sora?"

I blinked, surprised by how easily he read me. "yeah, I just—"

"Relax, babe. Namjoon's a good guy. Sora's in good hands," he said, squeezing my hand gently. His words should have reassured me, but they only made my thoughts spiral further.

The clock seemed to tick slower in the dimly lit room. Namjoon sat on the edge of the bed, his heart racing for reasons he didn't quite understand. Across from him, Sora was sitting on the floor, leaning back against the bed frame, swirling her seventh drink around lazily in her hand. Her cheeks were flushed a deep red from all the alcohol she'd consumed, her lips slightly parted as she hiccuped softly, a tipsy smile on her face.

Namjoon hadn't anticipated this turn of events. He had agreed to the game, figuring it would just be a silly, harmless round of "20 minutes in heaven." Maybe they'd laugh, maybe they'd talk, and then head back downstairs. But as the minutes ticked by, it was clear that Sora wasn't just tipsy; she was completely wasted.

"It's fine if you're not okay with this, Sora," Namjoon said gently, his voice filled with concern. He wasn't sure if she fully understood the situation, or if she was even aware of how out of it she was. He knew Sora could handle her alcohol—she was no stranger to parties—but tonight seemed different. Something was off.

Sora tilted her head up, giving him a lopsided grin. Her eyes were glazed over, barely focusing on his face. "It's fine, Joon," she slurred, her voice heavy with the effects of the alcohol. "I want you."

Namjoon's breath hitched in his throat as Sora suddenly lunged forward, pressing her lips against his with a surprising amount of force. Her kiss was sloppy, tasting overwhelmingly of alcohol. He could feel her hands fumbling at his shoulders, trying to pull him closer, but there was nothing about the situation that felt right to him.

Gently, but firmly, Namjoon pushed her away, breaking the kiss. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, the bitter taste of alcohol still lingering on his lips. "Sora," he said softly, his voice filled with worry. "How many drinks have you had tonight?"

Sora blinked at him, her head swaying slightly as she tried to focus on his face. "Uhm... twelve?" she replied, giggling at her own inability to remember. She flashed him a tipsy smile, her eyes half-closed. "But who's counting, right?"

Namjoon frowned, feeling a surge of protectiveness for her. This wasn't the Sora he knew—the sharp, witty, confident woman who could hold her own in any situation. This was someone drowning in alcohol, trying to numb herself from something deeper. He sighed, running a hand through his hair.

"Sora, no way I'm going to take advantage of you," Namjoon said, his voice firm but kind. He placed a hand on her shoulder, keeping her steady as she swayed slightly. "I'm not that kind of guy."

She looked up at him, blinking slowly, as if trying to process what he was saying. But instead of responding, she giggled again, leaning her head against his chest. "You're sweet," she mumbled. "But I'm fine, Joon. I can handle it. I'll drink those 15 shots for you." Her words were slurred, but her tone was playful, as if this were all a game to her.

Namjoon shook his head, his frown deepening. "Sora, you're drunk. You don't have to do that."

But she didn't seem to hear him. She was already pushing herself off the bed, wobbling unsteadily as she stood. Namjoon quickly stood as well, placing a hand on her arm to keep her from falling over. Sora's laughter echoed through the room as she stumbled toward the door, determined to go back downstairs and take those shots.

"Sora, wait," Namjoon said, his grip on her arm tightening slightly. "Let's just stay here for a bit, okay? You need to sober up."

But Sora was already reaching for the door handle, her movements clumsy and uncoordinated. Namjoon sighed, realizing that reasoning with her wasn't going to work. He had no choice but to follow her downstairs, keeping a close eye on her to make sure she didn't hurt herself.

Sora immediately headed for the table where the shots were lined up, her eyes gleaming with excitement.

"Sora, seriously, you don't need to do this," Namjoon tried again, his voice strained with concern. But she wasn't listening. She grabbed the first shot and downed it without hesitation, slamming the glass back on the table with a triumphant grin.

"One down!" she yelled, already reaching for the next one.

Namjoon stood by her side, his arms crossed, feeling a sense of helplessness wash over him. He didn't want to be the killjoy, but he couldn't stand by and watch her drink herself into oblivion. He knew something deeper was going on, something she wasn't talking about.

As Sora reached for the second shot, Namjoon stepped in, his hand gently covering hers. "Sora, stop," he said, his voice more commanding this time. "You're going to make yourself sick."

She looked up at him, her eyes wide and confused. "Why do you care so much?" she asked, her voice soft and vulnerable.

Namjoon's expression softened as he met her gaze. "Because you're my....friend," he said hesitantly. wasn't so sure if he wanted the friend as label for them. "And I don't want to see you hurt yourself."

For a moment, Sora just stared at him, her drunken haze lifting slightly as his words sank in. Then, slowly, she let go of the shot glass and leaned into him, resting her head on his chest.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice small. "I just... I just didn't want to feel alone tonight."

Namjoon wrapped his arms around her, holding her close as she trembled slightly in his arms. He didn't say anything, just let her rest against him, offering her the quiet comfort she so desperately needed.

After a few moments, Sora pulled back, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand. "I guess I've had too much to drink," she admitted, her voice shaky.

Namjoon smiled gently, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. "Let's get you some water, okay?" he said, guiding her away from the shots and toward the kitchen.

As they walked, Namjoon couldn't help but glance back at the crowd, where the game was still in full swing. He spotted me sitting with Jungkook, both of us laughing and enjoying ourselves, completely unaware of the emotional rollercoaster that had just unfolded upstairs.

In the kitchen, Namjoon filled a glass with water and handed it to Sora, who took it gratefully. She drank slowly, her hands still shaking slightly from the alcohol. Namjoon watched her closely, making sure she was okay.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked softly, leaning against the counter as he waited for her to finish drinking.

Sora looked up at him, her eyes filled with a mixture of embarrassment and sadness. "It's stupid," she mumbled, setting the glass down on the counter.

Namjoon shook his head. "It's not stupid if it's making you feel like this."

Sora sighed, running a hand through her hair as she leaned against the counter next to him. "I just... I had a crush on this guy," she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. "But he rejected me. And I guess I just... I don't know, I wanted to forget about it tonight."

Namjoon frowned, his heart aching for her. He knew how hard rejection could be, and it was clear that Sora was hurting more than she let on. "I'm sorry," he said softly. "That sucks."

Sora laughed bitterly, shaking her head. "Yeah, well, it happens, right? Can't win them all."

Namjoon didn't say anything, just stood by her side, offering her silent support. After a few moments of silence, Sora turned to him, her expression softening.

"Thanks, Joon," she said quietly. "For being here. And for stopping me from doing something stupid."

Namjoon smiled, his dimple appearing as he reached out to squeeze her hand gently. "Anytime."

As the night went on, the party continued in full swing, but Namjoon and Sora stayed in the kitchen, away from the chaos. They talked, laughed, and slowly, Sora began to sober up. By the time the party was winding down, Sora was feeling more like herself again.

"I should probably get home," she said, standing up from the stool she had been sitting on. "Before I do something else I'll regret."

Namjoon chuckled, standing up as well. "I'll bring you home," he offered.

Sora smiled, grateful for his kindness. "You're a good guy, Joon," she said as they made their way to the front door.

Namjoon shrugged, a shy smile on his lips. "Just doing what any friend would do."

As they stepped outside into the cool night air, Sora took a deep breath, feeling more clear-headed than she had all night. "You know," she said, glancing over at Namjoon. "I think I might have a crush on you now."

Namjoon raised an eyebrow, shocked.

The night was quiet outside the car, a stark contrast to the chaotic party they'd just left. Y/N and Jungkook were laying down in the backseat, the engine off, but the warmth of the night kept them comfortable. The windows were slightly fogged up from their relaxed breathing. Y/N shifted slightly, her head resting against Jungkook’s chest as she sighed, her fingers lazily playing with his.

"I feel bad for Sora," Y/N murmured softly, breaking the silence.

Jungkook, who had his arm wrapped around her waist, tilted his head slightly to look down at her. "Why’s that, baby?"

Y/N’s eyes fluttered as she blinked up at the ceiling of the car, her voice tinged with sadness. "Her crush rejected her. I saw how much she was drinking, and she just seemed... I don’t know, lost. I hate seeing people like that."

Jungkook’s fingers traced absentminded patterns on her side, his touch light and soothing. "I get it," he said softly. "But Namjoon’s got her now. He’ll take care of her. She’ll be alright."

Y/N nodded, her eyes closing for a brief moment as she breathed in the comforting scent of Jungkook's cologne. "Yeah... Namjoon’s a good guy," she said, her tone thoughtful. But there was something else bubbling underneath her words, something unspoken that she couldn’t quite put into coherent sentences.

A silence settled between them again, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. They both were wrapped in their thoughts, the events of the night playing back in their minds. Y/N felt her pulse slow, the alcohol leaving her system bit by bit, but her body was still buzzing with energy—though not from the party anymore.

"Jungkook?" she whispered, breaking the silence once more.

"Yeah, baby?"

She turned her head slightly, her lips brushing against his neck as she spoke. "Would it be kinda crazy if I said I want you to fuck me so bad in the car right now?"

Her words hung in the air for a split second before they sunk in. The shift in Jungkook’s demeanor was immediate. His body tensed beneath her as his breath hitched in his throat, the playful and relaxed atmosphere turning into something electric in an instant. Without another word, Jungkook’s lips crashed into hers, the intensity of his kiss matching the sudden fire that had sparked between them.

He rolled on top of her, his body pressing her down against the seat, his hands sliding down to her waist. His touch was firm but teasing as his fingers ghosted over the curves of her body, exploring the soft fabric of her dress that hugged her figure perfectly.

"You’re so hot in this dress, baby," he murmured against her lips, his voice husky and breathless from the kiss.

Y/N smiled into the kiss, her hands finding their way to the back of his neck, pulling him closer. "I should wear it more often, huh?" she teased, her voice dripping with seduction.

Jungkook growled softly, nipping at her bottom lip as he pulled back just enough to look down at her. His eyes were dark, filled with desire as he took her in—the way her hair spilled out over the seat, the way her lips were slightly swollen from their kiss, and the way her dress clung to her body in all the right places.

"Nope," he said, his voice low and possessive. "Save it for me."

Y/N’s heart raced at his words, a shiver running down her spine. There was something about the way Jungkook looked at her, the way his eyes drank her in like she was the only thing in the world that mattered, that made her feel completely and utterly desired.

His hands roamed her body, fingers tracing the edges of her dress as he pushed the fabric up, revealing the soft skin of her thighs. Y/N gasped, her hands gripping his shoulders as his touch sent sparks of electricity shooting through her.

"Jungkook..." she whispered, her voice breathy.

"Shh, baby," he murmured, his lips brushing against her neck as he trailed kisses down her collarbone. "Let me take care of you."

His words were a promise, a vow to make this moment about her, to worship every inch of her. His hands continued their journey up her body, pushing her dress higher until it was bunched up around her waist. Y/N bit her lip, her breath coming in shallow gasps as his hands slid beneath the fabric of her panties, teasing her with the lightest of touches.

Jungkook’s lips found hers again, kissing her deeply as his fingers brushed against her most sensitive spot, drawing a moan from her throat. He smirked against her lips, his fingers moving with more purpose now, knowing exactly how to make her body react.

"You’re so wet already," he whispered, his voice filled with pride. "All for me, huh?"

Y/N’s response was a soft whimper, her hips bucking against his hand, craving more of his touch. "Only for you," she breathed, her hands gripping his hair as she pulled him closer, wanting to feel every inch of him against her.

Jungkook groaned softly, his free hand gripping her thigh as he positioned himself between her legs, the fabric of their clothes the only thing keeping them apart. The tension between them was unbearable, the need for each other growing with every passing second.

Without another word, Jungkook pulled away from her, his hands fumbling with the buttons of his jeans as he kicked them off, his movements quick and desperate. Y/N followed suit, slipping her panties off and tossing them aside, her eyes locked on Jungkook’s as he hovered over her once more.

"You sure about this, baby?" Jungkook asked, his voice low and filled with lust, but still carrying a note of concern. He always made sure she was comfortable, that she wanted this as much as he did.

Y/N nodded, her hands reaching out to pull him closer. "I’ve never been more sure of anything," she whispered, her voice filled with need.

That was all the confirmation Jungkook needed.

He positioned himself at her entrance, his eyes locked on hers as he slowly pushed inside her, both of them gasping at the sensation. Y/N’s nails dug into his shoulders as he filled her completely, her body arching off the seat as pleasure surged through her.

"Fuck, baby," Jungkook groaned, his head dropping to her shoulder as he began to move, his pace slow but deliberate. "You feel so good."

Y/N could barely form coherent thoughts as he thrust into her, each movement sending waves of pleasure crashing over her. Her hands roamed his back, nails leaving faint marks on his skin as she clung to him, her body trembling with the intensity of it all.

"Jungkook," she moaned, her voice breathy and desperate. "Faster, please."

Jungkook’s eyes darkened at her request, and without hesitation, he quickened his pace, his hips snapping against hers with more urgency. The car rocked slightly with each thrust, the confined space making their movements even more intimate, every touch, every kiss, amplified by their closeness.

Y/N’s moans filled the car, her body completely consumed by the pleasure Jungkook was giving her. She could feel herself getting closer, the tension building in her core with each thrust. Her hands gripped his shoulders, her breath coming in ragged gasps as she teetered on the edge of release.

"Come for me, baby," Jungkook whispered in her ear, his voice rough and filled with desire. "I wanna feel you."

That was all it took.

Y/N’s body tensed as her orgasm crashed over her, her back arching off the seat as she cried out his name, her body trembling beneath him. Jungkook groaned at the sight of her coming undone, the feeling of her tightening around him pushing him over the edge.

With a few more thrusts, Jungkook followed her, his body tensing as he spilled inside her, his moans muffled against her neck as he rode out his own release.

For a moment, neither of them moved, their bodies still pressed together as they caught their breath. The only sound in the car was their ragged breathing, the tension slowly ebbing away, replaced by a soft, comfortable silence.

Jungkook pulled back slightly, his eyes soft as he looked down at her. "You okay, baby?" he asked, his voice gentle.

Y/N smiled up at him, her fingers brushing his cheek. "More than okay," she whispered, her heart still racing.

A/N : okay okay did you guys miss me?? i missed yall tooo. this was kinda short, i know. but i'll make sure to make the few of the last chapters worth it for you guys. thank you so much for taking ur time to read. tho i didn't reach my goal for 15k words i'm sure i'll get it soon

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morganas-pendragons · 5 months ago

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ease | celebrimbor

honest to god, I got this concept in the shower and it would not leave me alone. the prompt was found in the depths of the celebrimbor x reader tag (disclaimer: I am not a Tolkien reader, but I did grow up watching the movies and have done some research into the Silmarillion as I've been watching ROP) and this was born.

I've just found out some of the fates of these characters and I kid you not... I have a full fledged idea for a Celebrimbor/OC fic if my brain keeps this up

set during s2 of ROP, light spoilers ahead

prompt is here / this reader is a half-elven female who is gifted with magic. like I said, I am new to writing for this verse, so please be gentle.

***

You don't remember much about how you ended up in Middle Earth. There are glimpses, sweet fragments of memories that surface every now and again, but that is simply all they are. Glimpses of a time that has long come and gone.

Glimpses of who you were gone with it, like the receding tides of the ocean drifting further and further away.

The one thing you do remember with astounding clarity is your arrival to Eregion. You remember the front gates and how tired you were, and more importantly, you remember Celebrimbor. His complete and utter astonishment at your arrival was puzzling.

You didn't figure out why until later.

"Forgive me, but my healer tells me you have difficulties with remembering where you came from," He's standing in front of you where you sit in the healer's chambers of Eregion. You're surprised that they even let you in. Maybe he took pity on you. "Your injuries are minimal given how long he believes you were out in such conditions. Given your physical attributes, I would say you are at least Elvish. That would explain some of this. Do you remember your name?"

You didn't. The only things you had to remind you of who you were was the cloak around your shoulders and the circlet in your hair. A fine thing, crafted from what Celebrimbor later told you was pure silver.

"No...." You shake your head and wrap your arms tightly around yourself. He can't help but soften. You seem very lost. Celebrimbor is not one to take in lost souls, but there is something about you that draws in rapt fascination, and he is not willing to turn you away.

"You are no threat upon us. Now come. Let me introduce you to the great kingdom of the Elven smiths."

He extended his arm to you hesitantly. You found yourself taking it, staring up at him through a curious gaze as he dove into the histories of Eregion.

Weeks passed. You noticed the longer you were present in Eregion and in the forges that Celebrimbor was very particular about who was allowed to remain in his presence for long. There were his smiths, and his servants, but there were very few who were truly allowed to know him on a more intimate and vulnerable level.

You found yourself wondering why.

On a quieter day in Eregion's forges, you venture out of your room in search of Celebrimbor. Most of the staff is familiar with your presence by now. You've heard the whispers. They wonder how a forsaken Elf has managed to find her way into their King's good graces after such a short amount of time.

"Ah, I was wondering when you'd arrive. Come. I have something to show you." Celebrimbor greeted. You followed him around the edge of the forge to a table in the center of the room where a familiar silver circlet sat. Your eyes widened. You had been wondering where it went. "I was given enough moonstone from a recent discovery to restore your circlet and add a singular gem to the center. What do you think?"

Again the eyes and ears are drawn to the pair of you. You can feel their questions burning through the air: Why her? Why is she in his good graces? What does a forsaken elf have to give to the Lord of Eregion and the Master Smith?

"Might we have a moment in private?" You ask. There is no hesitation in his response. Celebrimbor dismisses his smiths, and in mere minutes, the two of you are alone. He seems perfectly content to be with you where no other eyes can see. "I don't understand. We've only just met, and I don't even know who I am, but here you are reforging and creating something so beautiful for a stranger," You pick up the circlet with delicate fingers, turning it over to gaze at the gem in the center. It's a very delicate design that incorporates much of the Elvish culture within it. "Why?"

There's a beat of silence that you interpret as apprehension. Answering this question requires a certain sense of vulnerability that he so often shies away from.

What he does instead surprises you.

''Because," Celebrimbor's voice drops to a whisper as he settles the delicate circlet in your hair, and you can't help but smile at how gentle it is. "You are.. different."

That's all he leaves you with. You're left to wonder what about you is different. What about you puts him so at ease.

***

Celebrimbor had not told anyone outside of Galadriel, Elrond and The High King what was known of your origins. What little the two of you could come up with about them. All the five of you are aware of is that you hold a great power with magic that brings the skill of healing and persuasion of any life form, and that you fell to Middle Earth within its vast oceans and found yourself destitute mere miles away from Eregion.

"It's almost like your coming was a sign."

Your visions turn out to be correct, much to your horror.

After Gil-Galad and Elrond’s departure, you find yourself lingering in your chambers with your circlet poised in your hands as you internally fight through all the evidence you have lingering in your head. Celebrimbor doesn't know what to make of it, and neither do you.

That turns out not to be your concern once you see him trudging past your bedroom, muttering to himself in Sindarin as he attempts to massage his shoulder with his hand.

"Celebrimbor?" You call, mindful to call quietly so that his smiths and the staff do not hear you. He always hears you. Always has, always will. "Are you alright?"

His aspect says one thing, but his eyes say another. "There is always tension that builds within the muscles and tendons of the body after working vigorously in the forge. I am just stiff. It is not a concern you need to bother yourself with-"

You raise a brow at his veiled attempt to console you. It doesn't work. Glancing over your shoulder, you quickly follow on his heels to his chambers where you slip inside just before he can shut the door.

He freezes. The two of you are alone. Properly alone.

"This is quite.." You falter in search of the right word. "If anyone knew I was in here, it would arouse suspicion. I can tell you're in pain. We both know that you cannot alleviate that on your own." You pause to interject, "Only if you truly want the help. I would be happy to serve."

Realization dawns in his eyes. Neither of you are properly aware of how close you really are to each other, much less the fact that your hand is pressed against his heart. It flutters under your touch.

He's nervous.

Your creased brow softens when Celebrimbor winces again at the turn of his head, and your eyes focus on his neck. "I am in a great amount of pain," He confesses quietly. It's quite a feat for him to be so willing to be vulnerable with you. Especially when you have yet to see him ask for help from anyone else, including Galadriel or Gil-Galad. "And I would be much appreciative of the help."

Celebrimbor would never admit it out loud, but something swelled within him at the sight of your smile as you rushed back to your chambers to gather the oils you had stored there. He had come to care for you a great deal. That was dangerous. There was too much at stake with his House and his past... A past that he would rather never speak aloud for fear of having to truly relive it.

"You'd be more at least if you lie down," You remark softly, laughing as his eyes snap open in alarm. "The oils only work with skin contact. Are you okay with that?"

It takes him a moment to realize what you're doing: You're both asking for his consent, and you're giving him the opportunity to say no. It's just another thing that draws him to you.

You turn away to grant Celebrimbor a modicum of privacy while you prepare yourself and the oils you brought. By the time you turn around, you nearly drop the vials. You should have assumed he'd have scars. That there would be old burns and far more muscle that he could hide under those robes.

The only piece of clothing he was wearing covered very little.

"Celebrimbor," You whisper. He cannot help the shiver that runs down his body when your fingers come into contact with his spine. It has been centuries since he had last allowed himself to be touched, and to be touched in such an intimate and positive way was foreign. "Are you in pain?"

You already know the answer to this question. He lays down on the bed and tucks his hands under his forehead. There's several moments of silence that pass before you hear him murmur, "I have been in pain for quite a long time, nin tinu. There has only been one thing that alleviates it."

The Sindarin that rolls off his tongue rings clear in your head. My star.

"What eases your pain, My Lord?"

Your oiled fingertips, doused in lavender oil, have just made contact with his shoulders when he answers: "You. It has been you from the moment you entered my gates, and it will be you for however long you remain here, if you wish to remain here in Eregion with me. You are not obligated to do so. I know you want to regain your memories.”

You mull over his words as your fingers travel his skin. You mark your touch with firm yet gentle presses against the valleys of his back, dragging your fingers across raised scars that arouse much curiosity within you. Celebrimbor melts into the bed beneath you as he allows himself to absorb a touch he had not realized he craved so deeply for an entire lifetime.

"You have introduced me to such a peace since I have been here. A peace that comes from being in the presence of people who truly care about you, of people who truly want the best for you. That's why you have not told anyone of my heritage. That is why you keep me so close to your side. To protect me.” Your ministrations have had their desired effect, because the moment you dig your fingers into where he'd been trying to massage earlier, it elicits a low groan from his chest. "Never has this destitute elf felt such peace as I have learning and living with and from you. I would be honored and privileged to remain in Eregion."

He's thankful in that moment that his face is hidden. Celebrimbor grimaces as tears prick the back of his eyes, blurring the sight of the blankets beneath him. He'd never experienced something as trivial as being loved in such a gentle, genuine manner.

"Dorth... nev na nin."

Again it rang clear as day. You were realizing the longer that Celebrimbor spoke in the Sindarin tongue that you were most definitely familiar with it.

He's asking you to stay with him. Permanently.

"Roll onto your back," You whisper. He complies with ease, showing you a stunning shade of hazel in the eyes that look back at you. "I-"

It's right there on the tip of your tongue as fingers stained with lavender oil linger right at the hair on his temples. You know you have been drawn to him since you arrived. It's not the hesitation in confession, it's in his response.

His lips part of their own accord as you bend your head to press your forehead against his own. You both want to kiss the other, and badly, but this act alone is intimate enough. It is too soon.

Celebrimbor’s breath fans over your face as he shudders, eyes flickering upward to meet yours through the hair that veils your face. "Just let me..."

Celebrimbor parts your hair to tuck it behind your ear and lifts his head just enough to graze his lips against your cheek. It's barely a kiss, more the ghost of a kiss then anything, but the way it puts your body at such ease speaks more then a real kiss could've.

His heart is pounding when he meets your eyes.

You're laughing when you part. He doesn't know why. What Celebrimbor does know is that the stiffness in his muscles is gone, replaced by an inexplicable warmth he's never quite felt before.

The shade of your eyes has been illuminated by a silver the same color of the jewel in your circlet, which is now glowing from where it sits upon your head.

He'll have to question that later.

"Why are you laughing? It's quite inappropriate to laugh in such a circumstance-"

You press your fingers to his lips. Celebrimbor is blushing so hard you're sure that his cheeks will stay that color for the rest of the night.

"If you wanted to get unclothed in front of me to have me touch you, all you had to do was ask."

#Celebrimbor #Celebrimbor x Reader #lord of the rings fanfiction #rings of power #rings of power fanfiction #rings of power spoilers

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flyingwargle · 1 month ago

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fics that changed my life in 2024

the movie sucked me back into the hq fandom and with that, fanfic. i read an obscene amount this year (as evidenced by my monthly recs, haha) and some of them have permanently changed my brain chemistry. here's my shoutout to these fics.

note: some fics are rated e!

general

With a little water (and a little bit of sunlight) t. 25.5k. 19/19. onigiri miya catches on fire and atsumu helps osamu in the aftermath. i revisit this from time to time for the brotherly bond, friendships, prose, and imagery. this fic proves that nothing is stronger than family.

sakuatsu

particularities t. 5.7k. everything about this fic is hilarious - the prose, premise, realization, confession - everything. the interaction with osamu lives rent-free in my head.

Watching You for Love t. 6.6k. the prose brings me to my knees. the imagery is vivid and incredibly connected to sakusa, and his pining for atsumu is so subtly displayed and beautiful.

Hall Pass t. 6.8k. i still don't know what a hall pass but i do know this fic is funny and one of my comfort fics. everyone needs to read saeko kissing atsumu. you're doing yourself a favor.

point of view t. 27.9k. 3/3. one of my first fics i read with insecure atsumu and sakusa wanting nothing more than to love him. i hold onto any fic that portrays mental health tightly because of the different ways it's portrayed, and this fic showed atsumu's insecure side vividly.

frankenstein's monster t. 83.6k. 10/10. one of skts' treasures that focuses on ocd. i love fics like these because of how writers are able to use their experiences to write deeply personal stories by knocking characters to their lowest and persevering through it.

easy to love t. 145.5k. 40/40. i love everything about this, from the prose, character development, slowburn romance, and side relationships. this fic made me like suna and sunaosa (they were portrayed so well) and pushed me deeper into skts. the confession scene is my favorite, of course.

terminal curiosity e. is there anything i need to say about this series that others haven't said already? it honestly changed my brain chemistry, like many others, and it's my comfort read, like many others (my poison is laid bare). honestly one of skts' best treasures.

sunaosa

a type of hunger m. 9.1k. this fic influenced how i view suna's character, with his desire and envy, self-doubt and struggle with identifying his relationship with osamu. it resonates deeply with how i want to write folded promises, which is why it sticks with me.

somewhere to lay the flowers t. 25.6k. trans suna is an icon we don't deserve. i love the mystery, the characters, the plot and conflict, and the web of interconnectedness between everyone involved.

iwaoi

Lost in Translation t. 9.6k. this fic is untagged but the summary gives you everything that you need to know. loved this for the humor and amazing ocs. it's one of my favorites for being a fun read.

we'll walk the mile and change it (if we can) t. 49.2k. 7/7. a devastating fic where oikawa undergoes a procedure to forget about ushijima and kageyama but forgets about iwa in the process. amazing prose, climax, and resolution.

bokuaka

in the same room, at the same time t. 22.1k. i read this in one sitting and did not regret any second of it. first: bokuaka proposal. second: it's just so tender and fluffy?? loved the setup and aftermath. it continues to live rent free in my mind.

truth is such a violent force t. 41k. 8/8. such delicate yet impactful writing on painful themes. i love how supportive fukurodani is to akaashi and the eventual getting together.

other pairings

Common side effects m. 89.9k. 16/16. kuroken. this captures the monotony and depression of adulthood so well, and delves into different kinds of relationships in a poignant way. beautiful character development and eventual getting together.

#haikyuu fanfic recs #fanfic recs #sakuatsu #sakusa kiyoomi #miya atsumu #sunaosa #suna rintarou #miya osamu #iwaoi #iwaizumi hajime #oikawa tooru #bokuaka #bokuto koutarou #akaashi keiji #kuroken #kuroo tetsurou #kozume kenma

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floralscented · 11 days ago

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ㅤㅤ ㅤa birthday like this ─ dean winchester.

baby sister!winchester oc & dean winchester, called bug. or, the only one to remember her big brother's birthday.

not a series! exists purely for writing ideas i get that cannot fit an x reader plotline. dean is 22, bug is 6. bug will gradually age in each possible coming part.

warnings. pure fluff! dean's birthday has the baby fever so high. there's, like, background angst, but it's nothing too bad<3

───────────────────────────────────

dean winchester decided that morning that he was not celebrating his birthday today. it'd been an idea long in the inner workings of his brain, mostly because there was no reason to celebrate it, on his end.

sam was away on a high school trip. john wouldn't be home for weeks, dean figured, so he signed the return slip in his place to at least grant his little brother that simple sense of normalcy. and bug was only starting to figure out that she was a person, let alone know what days were important compared to other days.

john was notorious for forgetting birthdays. he'd had a little girl when dean was sixteen and brought her home and seemed to forget that she even existed, most of the time.

the idea was cemented the morning of january 24th, when he woke up to his cellphone ringing on the bedside table next to him. for a moment, he really thought that his dad was calling to tell him happy birthday. for a moment, he was almost struck speechless.

but all john said on the other side of the line was a location, and a general debriefing of a case, before not-so-politely telling him to get on it.

dean was not disappointed, because he hadn't been expecting anything. but he was irritated. it was a prime example of the fact that he was only at home right now because someone needed to watch over bug, and it certainly wasn't going to be her father, who slipped away at the first chance he got. conveniently, dean was not told what to do with bug, so long as he took his father's orders and got shit done.

he slipped out of bed, a hand ruffling through his sleep mussed mop. through his gapped door, he could already hear bug singing to herself, and the sound of something getting scribbled on. of course he was set to have to clean crayon off of the walls on his birthday.

he changes out of his pajamas quickly and into a variation of his everyday wardrobe, and sighs heavily as he pushes open his bedroom door, bracing himself for the worst.

to dean's surprise, there was no mess. just a little girl sitting at the small kitchen table, hair more mussed than his was, still wearing the cowboy hat pajamas she loved so dearly. a piece of paper was in front of her, one that was being utterly decimated by the scribbles of a red crayon.

"hey, baby bug," dean sighs, his lips pulling into a tight smile, "hate to interrupt your riveting morning, but dad's got us goin' on the road tonight."

"on the road?" she asks, her head tilting to the side. still, her eyes don't leave the paper, her eyebrows furrowed as she focuses so heavily on the scribblings.

dean huffs out a laugh. "tell me about it."

bug is quiet for a second, the only sound in the room being the rough etches of her crayon against the paper. he realizes very quickly that if he wants to be in the car and to georgia before sundown, he's going to have to take matters into his own hands and get his baby sister moving.

his footsteps echo on the hardwood of the apartment's floor as he approaches, clapping his hands together a couple of times to gather bug's attention. his arms slip under hers as he yanks her out of the dinning chair. bug's fist crumples her paper to grab it as she's yanked, already stringing out unintelligible noises that he assumes are little kid curses.

"i know, i know," he says, tucking her to his chest with one arm as he carries her into what was once her and sam's shared room, but has now become hers alone. "but i wanna beat the sunset, and we can't do that if we're coloring all day."

bug's head tilts again. she looks so much like dean, sometimes. she's only his sister half-biologically, but there's so much of him and sam in her that he forgets it often. sam's little smile when she's amused, dean's nose scrunch when she's pissy. her nose is extremely scrunched up right now.

"can i bring my picture?" she asks as he rifles through the mess that was her room. at one point, a low point, he got tired of being her primary caregiver and let it get to this point. toys everywhere, sam's clothes littering the floor, her clothes in his dressers, her favorite dresses in her toy box...

he'd clean it up eventually, he promises himself every day. but rarely did he get time for himself or time at all to try, and most nights anyways, he had bug in his bed, an arm secured around her. there was no way he was going to run the risk of nearly losing her like he had with sam so long ago, when she was too little to know that possibility even existed.

dean helps her get properly dressed, running a brush through the tangly knots of her hair, before he answers. "promise not to color all over baby?"

the smile in the mirror's reflection was often the one thing that kept him from losing his mind. no, bug was not something he asked for, especially not to play father over her, but he could never be mad at her for that. "i promise."

"then sure," he says with a little shrug, grabbing a little sparkly ponytail from the top of the dresser and looping it through her hair, "only bring like, six colors, though. so we know if you lost 'em."

"my favorite ones?"

dean shrugs again, giving her ponytail a little tug before leaning down to scoop her up again. "you bring your favorite ones, i'll make sure we don't leave 'em anywhere, yeah? extra special crayon patrol duty."

packing for these on-the-spot trips had become routine at this point. bug had gotten used to it, too, by now, even unceremoniously declaring herself on snack duty, which meant dean was eating strawberry banana puffs and sipping apple juice for the duration of the drive. he handled the scarier stuff; the weapons, the toiletries, and diapers, before she'd grown up and no longer needed them.

it gives him pause for a second, when he's loading her into her carseat in the back, at how big she's gotten. does their dad even know that bug is nearly at his waist now? that she can argue dean in circles?

he doubts it. their dad didn't even remember his oldest's birthday, after all.

dean studies the map and the route while bug scribbles more in the background, still humming to herself. he's certain it's a baby medley of metallica songs, as certain as he is that this trip is going to take past sunset, regardless.

he scrubs a hand over his face and tries, really tries, to keep the irritation at a minimum. it was never bug's fault, but he wished sometimes that he didn't have to drag her into all of this, and so young, too.

the drive is strenuous; back roads melting into back roads, driving through small towns of people who also don't know it's his birthday. at least they have an excuse.

"dean!" bug screeches over the rock music, and when he glances in the rearview mirror, he meets her bright-eyed expression. "blue or purple?"

dean's mouth scrunches up as he thinks, an expression that bug mimics in the reflection back at him. his heart warms. "both."

"i can't do that!"

dean scoffs. "baby bug, you can do anything. you could make the freakin' sky green, if y'wanted."

he's guessing at this point, unsure of what she was even coloring back there. he hadn't gotten a glance at it back in the apartment, and definitely couldn't see anything but a mass of blurry colors from the rearview mirror.

"there is no sky." said as if dean was supposed to know the inner workings of his baby sister's brain. "it is a flower."

"blue petals, purple petals. easy."

one more glance in the mirror, and he watches as bug's expression shifts in realization. catches the start of an approving nod. of course he knew what he was talking about; who did anyone think taught her how to color within the lines?

it's always peaceful, somehow, on these long drives. bug keeps him company, which he actually appreciates. the silence might have ruined him if he kept subjecting himself to it. he remembers a time when she used to wake up from every car nap wailing, and he'd have to pull over and soothe her to sleep or handfeed her strawberry banana puffs. now, she was pretty much a little human, and he still couldn't believe it.

not his daughter, but he loved her like one, he thought. dean only wished that their father did, too.

the diner he pulls into is a little rundown, but he knows from experience that these are the best ones. hole in the walls of small towns that don't get the luxury of keeping them secret. he finds them all.

it's not even ten seconds after they're seated that bug cuts in, interrupting the waitress's rehearsed lines. "it's his birthday."

dean actually falters, stuttering over the stern words about politeness and whatever else you're supposed to teach to kids to not let them turn into his father.

the waitress's eyebrows raise, a little smile curling on her mouth. "that so?" she taps her pen on the pad of paper in her fingers before she looks over at dean. he doesn't like this. there was some sort of communication in that look on her face and on bug's that he was not getting. "want a milkshake?"

"no," dean starts, his lips pulled tight, his throat tight, everything a bit more intense now, for some reason, couldn't understand why.

at the same time, bug says, "yes."

the waitress winks and stalks off before he can do a thing about it. "baby bug." his voice is stern, but not as stern as he wants it to be.

bug sits up straighter in her seat, tilting her chin up in a way that indicated he was about to have his ass handed to him. "why don't you want a milkshake?"

the truth was that he didn't want a birthday, but he couldn't explain his pessimism to a toddler, so he says, "because big kids want something stronger than milkshakes."

"two milkshakes?"

his eyes close for a second. alcohol is probably not a good thing to teach toddlers about, either. "i didn't even think you knew today was my birthday," he says instead, nudging her little hand over the tabletop.

a look of pure befuddlement crosses over bug's expression. "i know birthdays."

the picture that she'd been working on all day makes an appearance on the table. he knew she'd been clutching something in her hand when he carried her into the diner, but hadn't been very focused on what she was doing. it'd been a long day, long drive. it was probably a crayon she'd lose and they'd have to come back in for before they continued driving. extra special crayon patrol duty and all.

it's edges are crumpled from her little fist gripping it so tightly, and the fold of it is jagged, but there in front of him is a card. the front of it is entirely made up of red hearts, only little bits of white paper peeking between them.

dean's eyes flick between her and the card a couple of times, his jaw loosing and closing and opening again. "you've been making this for me? all day?"

"it is very special." bug adjusts on her side of the booth, balanced on her knees as she leans across to the center of the table to open it. "look."

on one side is a giant purple and blue flower. purple petals scattered between blue petals, and a clear mix of blue and purple for the stem, layered atop each other. on the other side, in big letters, some backwards, some uppercase and some lowercase, is happy birthday dean!!!!!

dean feels a little like a baby himself, with the way his breath hitches. he can't cry over a birthday card. how pathetic would that make him?

"the back is not done." she slides the card closer to dean, urging him to take it, nose scrunching up in that familiar contempt. "you said we have to come n' eat."

dean takes it from her, flipping it over to see what had her so twisted up. his eyes actually do well up, then, at the sight of a big stick figure drawn in blue and purple, and a littler one next to it, holding its hand, in blue, purple, and pink. the dress on the littler one, as she said, was not done. neither was the green sky.

"thank you," he says, his voice a little more breathless than he wanted it to be, a lot more choked up than he expected. "m'gonna keep this forever, y'know."

bug doesn't even look fazed at the fact that he was damn near crying over a handmade birthday card. in fact, she looks downright smug, wearing sam's dimpled smile. "y'better. i worked really hard."

"yeah, baby bug. it shows."

the waitress slides a milkshake in front of dean, and a littler one in front of bug. then she turns without another word to go to the back of house again. dean's a little too raw to care that they hadn't even ordered yet, plucking the cherry off the top of the whipped cream and chewing on it to keep from thinking too hard.

bug's chugged half of her milkshake by the time the waitress comes back, a slice of pie on a little plate with a lit candle in its center. "it's not much, but..." she trails off, glancing between bug and dean with a little smile, "i figured this was a very big deal."

bug nods furiously, still not having stopped drinking her pink milkshake. the sugar rush was going to be impossible when they reached the hotel, but with how light dean was feeling, he might end up jumping on the bed with her.

"make a wish!" bug huffs, her little leg kicking out at dean's knee beneath the table.

dean stares down at the cherry pie, the whipped cream hiding the candle's base in it's foam. what did you wish for when things never tended to go right?

in his pocket, dean's phone buzzes. he blinks once, blinks twice, before answering. "sam?"

"hey!" sam's voice is like a soothing distraction to the ache in his chest. he figured the field trip would take up most of sam's attention, hadn't been expecting any sort of phone call or word from him until he came home. he'd had a lifetime of doubts that kept him from believing that anyone could consider him. "happy birthday, dean."

his heart falters in his chest again. dean smiles before he can stop himself. "thanks, sammy," he says, his voice still rough on the edges, "wanna talk to bug?"

bug's already reaching across the table to steal the phone, and as she does, dean considers the candlelit pie again. he listens to sam's muffled voice from the other side of the booth, and bug's excited recounting of her birthday card making, and he knows what to wish for.

another birthday like this, dean thinks, as the flame dissipates into smoke.

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notes, cried writing this thank u for asking. this was one of those shower ideas that wouldn't go away, so... wrote it! anything for my birthday baby.

tags. @titsout4jackles @moonstruksandco @starzify @ultravi0lence14 @itzavahere @sagegreen17 @bruceewayne @jays-bonnie-on-the-side @deansbeer @blushpinkdoll @warpedless @sabrinasopposite @k-slla @deansbite @foolinthera1n @honeyryewhiskey @angelblqde @whyyouegg @bluemerakis @fallbhind @florchids @figthoughts @beausling @chevroletdean @mccartneyqp @bluestrd @sthefferrete @rubyvhs @tortureddarkstar @aileenunfiltered @frosttbitessam @theosaurous

#──★ dahlia's jrnl #sibling!reader #baby sibling!reader #dean winchester #dean winchester one shot #dean winchester drabble #supernatural #spn #supernatural one shot #spn one shot #supernatural drabble #spn drabble #happy birthday dean winchester!#i don't remember who made this divider #but if u know #pls let a girl know

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choppedsouldreamer · 2 months ago

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Guys some how I did even more doodles than last time, like 20- I THINK I NEED HELP NGL I NEED TO REMEMBER TO TAG EVERYONE GUHHH-

Sorry if these are kind of hard to see, I had to take them at a distance so my camera wouldn't automatically make the pics sideways for some reason- needed to migrate these ones to my bed this time since there is no room on my cooker, even if I did indeed cook again U-U This does include pixel art that is kind of hard to see what it is as well so sorry about that but this is my first time trying pixel art and I worked with what I had which was grid paper- (UGH THE PENCIL ONES ARE SO HARD TO SEE TOO MY CAMERA IS TRASH ;-;)

Full pic of all the doodles:

SMG3 doodles close up, Ik you asked for more SMG3 @roxy4life so here you go, eat up my friend:

My OC doodles with a teensy bit of lore hehe, oh and first ever drawing of THE CHILD!!!:

of course an autism creature because we all love this silly lil thing:

and last but not least, the creator doodles!:

@grinnames: here I go drawing this goober again ugh, in all seriousness though I love this guy, just look at him, all he wants is your body parts so why don't you kindly donate them ya silly? I would go on a tangent complimenting you again but I doubt you want that though, so just know you are one of my favourite creators :D

@tophatwearingidiot: hey look who it is! that's your design for my silly gal right there!! I was planning to draw my puffels for so long as you know but my brain constantly got filled and I forgot about it, so here, you got a doodle!! I WILL GET TO THIS I SWEAR UGGHHHHHH, both mentioned as my OC doodles and creator doodles lucky you

@tiredsmashbros and @its-a-me-mango: decided to do you two as two mini doodles together! you two are so damn awesome I love both your art so much AHHHHH, I wish I was as cool as you guys I swear and I love both of your characters so much so here's TSB inhaling a burger Kirby style and Mango just having to deal with his crap like usual and wishing he just got more money for it since TSB is just other worldly XD COOL ARTISTS RIGHT HERE!!! OH GOD DAMN IT HERE I GO DOODLING TSB AGAIN, TOMM HELP ME OUT HERE AND GET HIM OUT, MANGO EXTRACT HIM FROM MY BRAIN PLEASE

@michealscorneroftheinternet: oh boy did you get treated my friend, a meme and another doodle of Ink SMG4? damnnnn, all jokes aside I can't get over these designs, like your ideas are just insane to me and literally all your AU's are my favourites GOD HOW MUCH I LOVE THE UNDERTALE AU AND CHANGE IN SCRIPT AND FALLEN AU DB)SBD)SYVDSVFAD(F)- dude, tell me your secrets how are you this talented? /silly but true on the last part. You're constantly in my brain now too hahahah (HELP ME-) oh and I have a surprise for you! yeah, you thought that was it? haha...no..so you know those doodles of said ink and error 4 and 3? well I'm still thinking of those BUT, I have these as a substitute I'm working on since Ibispaint is up and running on my phone AHA! GET DUNKED ON WITH MORE ART YOU CAN NEVER BEAT ME /silly

I wanted to include more of my crazed AU and thought this was too perfect so had to do it, DID SOMEONE SAY PERFECT?!? /j

bro gets to not talk sometimes because he had chains around his neck YIPPIE!! (and hehe @theartistisme43 mentioned) that's if you can read my doodle handwriting lol, if not here it is (purple = SMG3 blue = SMG4)

bottom doodle: so you also had a run in with Mr Puzzles huh? Yep... So fuckin done with life

Top doodle (left): AYYYY!!!

Top doodle right: can't breathe sometimes and talk, knows how scarred 4 feels

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twisted-wonderland-but-gayer · 2 months ago

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Idk if you've already answered this, but have you ever thought of Yuu having a different physiology than the rest of the twst cast? More or less in the way that isn't really noticeable, but enough to make their friends feel "off"

(Like, imagine if Yuu's blood is so different from the rest that it needs an entire different study solely dedicated to it)

I didnt get this in my notifs

I think about this so often. Esp cause my ocs are not any race in twst

Like in a slightly different way: Yuus body digesting nutrients differently— and no doubt the food in TWST is better suited for the natives so Yuu has to play a fun game of "am I allergic to this" and "will this thing I like in my world taste like utter shit here orr?" All while getting half the nutrition or not even being able to process it. "Yes Jamil, you make banger curry— sadly it fucks up my body and I gotta throw it up"

Even little things like they don't have a blood type that exists there so they're fucked if something happens. Their magic tolerance is lower, so they get sick from it. They're not allergic to cats, but Leona's shedding is making them wheeze. Or perhaps they're allergic to Fae? Not even counting the flu/diseases that go both ways. A common cold nearly kills them cause they aren't vaccinated there, but a cold from them puts Deuce in the hospital

Did humans in TWST evolve from the same things?? "Lol we were fishies" "huh"

This can go the other way too. Yuus body being much more complex or "stronger' than the humans there (maybe even beastmen). Like yeah they can also hear that along with Jack, what do you mean you can't, Ace? Their bloodtype doesn't exist but ooh boy Ortho just found the cure for cancer scanning it– your antibodies are very impressive! Of course they don't need that many hours of sleep. A Yuu built like Epel or Lilia yet their muscles are on par with Jack?? Vil tries to help them with their skin but they need extremely concentrated face wash. Their brain scans are incomprehensible.

Take this to two other extremes and maybe the air there makes them 'sick' or is hard to adjust to. Maybe the sun there is too hot. Their eyes are "off putting" because too big/small. The oils on their skin are more corrosive— their stomach acid should kill them. Maybe they can eat "poisons" that the rest can't eat in large amounts or have to be cooked a certain way. Yet here is yuu swallowing cherry pits and that amount of capsaicin should make you sick— not even Cater can have that!

Yuu gets to exaggerate their body stuff and they're none the wiser. What if the cast are all very light for Yuu and you can pull students off each other when they fight? Vargas is impressed.

The other extreme is tolerance/defense. No diseases seem to affect you at all, neither does magic. In fact you seem to drain it from the world around you. A fireball your way fizzles out. You have to leave the magic exam room cause people keep failing in your presence. You can't be "beheaded" or turned to sand or cursed or hypnotized... there are exceptions to the magic that actually can affect you however, and once you're cursed, there's no going back.

Yuu gets critically injured and healing spells just won't work. They get a curse that will kill them and no potion or incantation cures it. It's a glass canon and people here are armed with bricks

Or– maybe yuu is a very conductor of magic (fav headdcanon). Which is why we strengthen people in game. We can unlock magic potential in others, and the simplest flame on a fingertip becomes an inferno when you step into a room. Aces magic well has tripled since being your friend. And Deuce and Epel got their UM very early with you around

Idk Humans are Space Orcs type things

#not writing #not requests #ramshackle #many thoughts

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inbarfink · 1 year ago

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"Just move forwards, Simon! Well, maybe I don't want to move forwards!"

Okay, so it’s pretty damn obvious that Simon’s whole rant here is not just about the physical act of moving forwards through the Time Room. Like, I don’t need to explain what ‘moving forwards’ means in this case, right? But… the thing I’ve been thinking of is that the metaphor here might actually extend more than just this one line.

Because, yeah, Simon does need to move forwards. Metaphorically because embracing change and accepting you can’t actually go back to some idealized past where things were Better is the only way he can actually be happier. And literally because there is an Angry Beetle Cop out to murder his head off for the crime of being chosen by God as a sapient hard-drive.

But moving on is hard, and you know why?

Because it is hard to move forwards in this silly little mumu.

And again, this is both metaphorical and literal. Simon is fully aware that he should move forwards with his life, but this robe is yet another painful reminder of the trauma he’s trying to move on from. Yet another example of people treating him like he’s Ice King. Yet another symbol that him being Simon again is seen as some sort of a mistake.

And also, it’s just obviously physically, literally uncomfortable for him to move in this thing.

Simon was forced into a fit designed for a Wizard who could Fly. He’s constantly lifting it up and being so careful about his steps as to not stumble on it, and also trying so hard to not flash his genitalia to God and God’s two OCs that he shoved in his brain. Not to mention he’s running around the Time Room barefoot. And, like, at least when Ice King wore this he still had underpants.

But the thing is.... like, okay, the thing about the Shorts Scene is that it is kinda unfair Fionna got her outfit upgraded into a more comfortable variant while Simon still has to wear the Trauma Robes. But the important thing to remember is that Fionna got those lovely shorts because she explicitly complained about the skirt.

You can say that Simon’s problems should’ve been Obvious and maybe that’s true… but it’s still notable that unlike Fionna, who immediately complained when she started to find her outfit kinda uncomfortable - Simon lets out one sarcastic grumble when he first gets the robe and then just keeps his mouth shut and quietly wallows in his misery until he reached his breaking point.

That seems notable especially with what we see of Simon in “Simon Petrikov” and how hard it is for him to be honest with his loved ones about his problems.

I’ve seen some people express some anger at the way Finn and Marceline acted towards Simon during that episode. Saying they didn’t care about Simon enough. But Simon was deliberately hiding his struggles from them - and especially from Marcy. You know, he opened up to Finn and Finn was honestly doing what he thought was best. The problem being that Finn is pretty-messed-up himself and not good at therapy.

And Simon decided the best solution was just to drop the whole thing and pretend that Finn’s adventure did help as a way to end that nightmare without directly confronting him about Actually Making Things Worse. As far as Finn is concerned, Simon was doing badly and is now doing well. And as far as Marcy is concerned Simon is doing just fine! And this situation is not likely to change unless Simon actually speaks up!

Of course, this is easier said than done. I mean, like I said, he was TRYING to open up to Finn and from his perspective, got punished for even trying out for help.

And with the mumu, the situation is a even more complicated. Yes, Simon didn’t speak up when he had the chance to say ‘hey, actually it’s also pretty hard to run around barefoot in a robe! I would like some Pants please!” But also… where Finn and Marceline have both expressed nothing but genuine concern for Simon and take his issues very seriously in their own way - Prismo, Fionna and Cake have all been kinda callous about Simon’s situation and his mental well-being so far.

So maybe it wasn’t totally unreasonable for Simon to assume that any attempt to assert what would make it easier for him to actually move forwards will fail. Or at least would be far too emotionally grueling to actually be worth it. I'm not saying that's for-sure what would've happened. I mean those three aren't just jerks for the sake of being jerks - it's just that Prismo is kinda occupied with his own grief-induced-depression-spiral and Fionna and Cake don't really get Simon yet. And we're surely going to get to a point in this narrative where these two genuinely care about him too sooner or later. But I can see in that moment why he would think that.

And so he keeps wallowing in the misery and resentment as it gets increasingly harder and harder to keep going forwards. Until he breaks and decide that maybe, what he actually wants is to just stop.

#adventure time #atimers #fionna and cake #adventure time fionna and cake #adventure time spoilers #at spoilers #fac spoilers #fionna and cake spoilers #fionna and cake series #fionna and cake show #fionna and cake simon #adventure time simon #simon petrikov #simon adventure time #prismo the wishmaster

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sidekick-hero · 1 year ago

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Edited for a big shout out to @steves-strapcollection whose lovely OC has a little cameo here. If you want to know who Tig is, you can find out here. Spoiler: he's amazing and we love him.

Day 0

Dear Steve,

Hi Stevie,

Apparently, it's not good to "bottle up" your feelings. They say it makes drinking or drugs or any other addiction so tempting. It makes it easier to keep all that stuff inside you and let it fester until you need more and more of whatever it is that helps you cope. So the first rule of rehab: Talk, don't take.

That's a long way of saying I need to keep a journal like a 13-year-old girl with her first crush. It's either that or a daily crying session with the other "inmates" here, and I'd rather not have to tell Terry the old gossip my own tragic sob story. She already told me the life stories of two other patients here at dinner.

Instead, I decided to write to you. You're the one person I regret the most pushing away, and even though you'll probably never see this, it feels good to tell you these things now. Like a dry run. Because, baby, when I get out of here, I swear I will let you in. I won't make the same mistakes.

You will never go another day without knowing how much you mean to me.

How much I love you.

You only left an hour ago and I already miss you. I can't believe I've survived six months without you. Well, I barely did. I wish I could call you, but phone privileges are only for those who make it through their first week here.

I know we chose this center together knowing that they don't allow visitors for at least three weeks. Maybe longer if my therapist says I'm not ready. Fuck, three weeks didn't sound so bad when we talked about it, but now? In this ugly, impersonal room that smells clean but is totally clinical. You know, that mix of disinfectant and sterile air with a hint of medication lingering in the background. It sounds like an eternity and then some.

Nothing here feels comfortable or warm, and I miss your face so much it physically hurts.

But I promised myself I'd do whatever it took. For you and Wayne, for the boys and the kids.

So, day 0, the journey begins.

Fuck, I almost forgot: I'm supposed to answer three questions every day.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

See above. I miss you, that's how I am. I want this to be over. I hate that I'm here and even more that I'm the one who got me here. I feel like a fuckup. It's hard not to when I see how I've ruined everything good in my life. But then I remember the way you kissed me goodbye. The smile on your face when you told me how proud you were of me. The way you kissed my hand because you couldn't let go and whispered, "I'll see you soon," and I want to have hope.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Get through the day without doing anything I'll regret.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

You. That you didn't give up on me. (And the Gummi Bears you hid at the bottom of the bag, you minx. Thank you.)

Day 4

Sweetheart,

I'm not doing so well. It's hard. Who am I kidding? It sucks. My body hurts from how much I want to use. My brain is so very loud, Stevie. So, so loud. I try to remember how you managed to calm me down when my brain got like this. What helped the most was to wear me out by fucking me senseless, but that's not an option. But maybe I will try to go for a walk or even do some of those exercises you always tried to get me to do. The ones that usually led to fucking because I could never behave.

My therapist is nice. Her name is Laura, and so far she's taking everything I throw at her in stride. Talking to her feels like pulling my own teeth and I feel like shit afterwards, but I sleep better. Who would have thought, huh?

I miss you.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

Not good. I wonder if I can really do this. It doesn't feel like it right now. I'm afraid I won't make it. That I will screw up again. That if I do, it'll kill me and I'll be grateful because I couldn't live with myself if I did.

I don't want to die, Stevie.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Talk to the weird kid who always sits by himself during meals. He looks lost. Maybe he knows DnD.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

Still you. Every day. Wayne, for taking me in when I felt like a failure too. Unlovable. Worthless. He never stopped believing in me. Even when I gave him every reason not to. I don't know how I deserve him or you, but I am so fucking grateful.

Day 7

Fuck, I missed your voice. God. I'm sorry I lost it like that. I didn't want the first thing you heard from me after a week apart to be me ugly sobbing into the phone.

I wanted to tell you so many things. I had a plan, you know? But hearing your voice when you said, "Hi, baby," it just broke me. You sounded like you missed me too, like you were relieved to hear my voice too, and you didn't even realize how scared I was that you wouldn't.

We just hung up, but I want to call you again. Just to hear you breathing on the other side so I know you're still there. Waiting for me. Your hand still gripping mine so I wouldn't get lost.

You said, "I'll hear you tomorrow," like it was set in stone, no doubt about it. It made me feel, fuck, I don't even know. Like this is real. I didn't die on that bathroom floor, and you giving me another chance isn't some kind of hallucination or afterlife dream.

I'm rambling, sorry. Even in writing I can't help it.

One day I'll write it all down in a way that makes sense, I promise.

I love how patient you are with me. No one has ever been. I was always too loud, too distracted, too weird, too complicated, too much. But not to you.

I wish you were here to take me in your arms, it's hard not to fall apart without you holding me together.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

Better. Fucking determined to get through this and get back to you. Still scared.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Have a real conversation with you without breaking down on the phone. Here's to hoping. Detoxing and being sober has given me a hair trigger on my emotions, it seems.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

Your patience. Your grace. Your voice in my ear. That you still haven't given up on me. DnD, for giving me a purpose when I needed one, a tool to give others the help I so desperately wanted. The weird kid's name is Alex, and he does know DnD. We'll try to find more people for a campaign.

Day 16

Steve, baby,

I am so fucking sorry. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. I'm such an asshole. Please pick up the phone. I need to tell you how sorry I am. I didn't mean it, I was just scared. When you said that maybe Laura was right and you shouldn't come to see me next week if I wasn't ready, I thought you didn't want me anymore. That you finally got tired of holding my hand and watching me do those damn baby steps. It's been over two weeks, why am I not better? Why am I not done with this shit?

I want to be done, I swear.

Please don't leave me.

Please pick up the phone.

Please, please, please.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

Fuck this shit, what good is it if I keep hurting you?

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Stop being a fucking asshole.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

I want it to be you, but I'm not sure I even have you in my life anymore.

Day 23

Stevie,

I'm scared. Isn't this the stupidest thing you've ever heard? A few days ago I begged to see you. Fuck, I was so desperate to see you that I almost ruined everything. I'm still sorry, I hope you know that. I know, I know, you said that it's okay and that it can't be all smooth sailing, that you forgive me. That you'll keep forgiving me as long as I keep coming back to talk to you, to explain, to show you that I mean it.

And now I've got the all clear for you to come and see me, and I'm too scared to tell you.

I'm still not the man I want to be. The man who deserves someone like you.

Laura told me that love isn't something you deserve, it's something freely given. We don't decide if someone can love us, only they do. And that I have to stop pushing people away because I'm convinced they can't love me. It's their choice and I shouldn't try to take it away from them.

I think about this a lot.

I want to let you love me, I do. It's just hard for me to understand why you would want to do that at all. It's something Laura wants to work on with me as well.

There is so much work to do. I hate to bother you with it. To make it your problem. I wanted to come in here and two weeks later walk out a new man. A better one. One you can love easily and who can love you back in a way you can understand. A man Wayne can be proud to call his son. A man Gareth and Jeff and Grant want to have as a friend, as a bandmate. A man the kids can look up to as much as they look up to you.

Laura said I should take the hand you are holding out to me. It's a decision I make every day. I took it in the hospital. I took it when you drove me here.

I should take it by letting you in, letting you see the work in progress that I am right now.

I think I will call you after dinner to tell you.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

Fuck if I know. It's a lot to feel when you've numbed your feelings for so long. I remember why I did it, but I won't do it again, I'll learn to deal with it.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Take you in my arms and hold you. Let myself be held by you.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

Your hand in mine. The thought of you that keeps me going. Your bravery. Dustin and Mike and Will and Lucas. They call me all the time, you know. Asking me about my first campaign here, telling me about their lives. Keeping in touch, even though I failed them almost as much as my old man did me.

Day 31

Steve, my love,

You're on your way to pick me up and I can't believe we made it here. It's not done, it probably never will be. I know that now. I have to keep working on myself and being well. But it's so fucking worth it, Stevie.

I'm glad that Laura agreed to stay my therapist even if I leave the center. I trust her. She gets me, she knows when to push me and tell me the ugly truth, and when I need time to process things.

I haven't told you yet, but I'm not going back to Corroded Coffin. At least not right now. I talked to the guys and they all agreed that it's best if I take some time for myself. And for you. For my family and friends. They actually have a guy named Tig who auditioned while I was here and they like him. He's good, they sent me a demo. They asked me if it would be okay and I said it would be. It's true, even though it hurts. I have to do this for myself.

Because I am going to give this to you later, I want to tell you something here before I lose my courage.

Steve. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I know I haven't always shown you the way you deserve. Hell, some days I certainly didn't act like it. My worst days. But I never stopped loving you. I don't think I ever will.

But I also learned to like myself a little better here. I no longer want to punish myself for things that were out of my control, like my mom dying or my dad not caring enough for me to stay. I want to be loved. I want you to love me. I want to let you.

I want to finally leave the past behind and allow myself to think about the future. And whenever I do, you're in it. You're the anchor, the epicenter of all my plans.

Stevie, sweetheart, I want to marry you.

Don't worry, I'm not proposing. This is just something I needed to tell you. Someday I want to be your husband, if you want me.

You are my past, my present and my future.

This is me taking your hand every day until I die or you stop reaching for me.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

So fucking excited to have you all to myself again. Seriously, I'm going a little crazy. I'm also hopeful about the future. And in love. I'm so fucking in love with you.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

To start our life together without forgetting what came before.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

My second chance.

#steddie #steddie fanfiction #stranger things fanfiction #rockstar eddie munson #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddielovemonth #day 17 #Love is about a hand reaching out to you so you don't get lost #my writing

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innorogers · 3 months ago

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Vigil

Steve Rogers x Reader (You / OFC)

Summary: For a man who has faced down gods, monsters, the end of the universe, this kind of fear is new to him. It’s not the enemy outside he fears—it’s the thought of losing you, of failing to protect you. Again.

Warning: Mention of sex / Fluff & Angst / Protective Steve / Jealous Steve /

Characters: OC, Tony Stark, Maria Hill, Bruce Banner, Sam Wilson, Sharon Carter, Natasha Romanoff / John Walker

Also: Thanks in advance for repost or any feedback ❤️ Let me know if you want to be included in the taglist (DM, comment, repost and tag, whatever works)❤️ You don't need to read the previous chapters but it will definitely enhance the experience if you do.

It ended just as expected. Steve cummed twice in the shower—once in your mouth, because, damn, he tasted amazing after cleaning up, and again inside you, because you smelled just as irresistible with that jasmine scent in your hair.

So here you are, three cups of coffee later, and about to nap on your desk. The body Hydra gave you was strong, but you’ve been in a car chase, with the Iron Army hunting you down, fought in a nightclub, and probably had four or five rounds of sex with Steve. You honestly don’t know what was more exhausting. You’d guess the mission that had gone rogue, but honestly, the sex just left you breathless.

"Oh, rough night?" Robert handed you a fourth cup of coffee, eyeing the dark circles under your eyes. "Need the adrenaline shot?"

"Um…" You actually considered it for a moment. Your body metabolized stuff like that too fast, though—it would only last for a couple of hours, tops. "Nah, forget it.” You need your brain clear to process everything that happened.

“I’ve heard…” Dr. Lin’s voice interrupted your thoughts as he leaned casually on your desk, his eyes scanning the room where your colleagues were clearly whispering about you. “That Captain America had quite the adventure yesterday. Right after leaving the UN, too.”

He tsked and pulled out his phone, showing you a few grainy clips. Footage from CCTVs and some shaky handhelds—probably from people who had their phones out at the right moment. “A broken bridge, streets on fire, and…a fight in a nightclub? You’re gonna need more than coffee to survive this shift, I think.”

You groaned, rubbing your temples. “Too late for damage control, huh? Is it all over the news?” You could only imagine the hell Steve was going through with Commander Hill: ‘I gave you 1,278 security protocols, and you ignored them all?!’ Yeah, you weren’t setting foot in the command room today.

“Not quite all over the news yet—mostly social media.” Dr. Lin was clearly enjoying the UN’s PR disaster a bit too much. “I think they’re working overtime behind the scenes to sweep it under the rug. Captain America gets attacked his first time outside the compound during ‘The Reconciliation of the Century’? Yeah…someone’s having a bad day in PR.”

“Anyway…as I was saying…You’re gonna need more than coffee, we’ve got company today…”

“What? Company?” You were surprised. “They’re letting people in?!” After yesterday’s security breach?

“Seems the first New Era Project agent that the UN sent was a fraud or didn’t work. And since we visited them yesterday already, today, they’re sending some new guys.” Dr. Lin looked at you, lowering his glasses: “Yikes, right? So for today, we need to pretend we’re working. ‘Cause we’re not sharing our real stuff…which will make this day unbearable.”

Oh. You grimaced after Dr. Lin turned around and began “working.” Yeah, you knew everything about how the last agent went wrong. But actually, this ‘pretend to be working’ thing was good—you needed to analyze everything that had happened.

You opened a document connected to Tony’s hub and started typing, outlining the details for him in your usual style. (It was your private little system—documents stored in The Crib, or what the three of you called the ‘Geniuses’ Sticky Notes.’) You’d barely finished bullet point five when someone in a crisp military uniform appeared beside you, smiling next to your screen.

“Hi, Doctor—whose phone number is still confidential. Nice to see you again.” John Walker said smiling, quoting the line you’d once used to refuse giving him your number.

Oh dear Lord, he really should have taken a nap with you when he had the chance, instead of those three—no, four rounds of sex you had in the dressing room and the shower.

Steve thought after suppressing another yawn, trying to focus on the screen, where Thadeus Ross was losing his temper again, explaining why the UN had nothing to do with the attack he and you got yesterday.

But who was he kidding? Steve almost smiled. Nope, no way he’d have preferred the nap over the sex. That was exactly what he needed after being hard almost the entire afternoon. And four times weren’t enough—he would have gone on if you weren’t in the dressing room.

For fuck’s sake, when is this over? He couldn’t wait to get back to your private lab-slash-home, have a light dinner, and get in bed with you.

Oh, that’s a nice thought: a sex marathon for the weekend is all he needs after this hellish week. He started thinking of your intertwined bodies, your begging moans that sounded like heaven... Yeah, okay, he needs to focus. Maybe listen to what the Secretary has to say instead of thinking about your messy hair, your heavy breath, your skin that felt like silky sweet milk, and your mouth... Yup, stop. Let’s hear Ross, so he doesn’t get hard again in the middle of a full meeting room.

He felt a glare on him, so he looked around and saw Agent Sharon Carter staring with her eyebrows raised, as if saying, “Gotcha, pay attention.” Steve suppressed a smile and looked down. Oh boy, this was going to be a long day.

“I thought your super friends were going to be attending this meeting too.” Once the screen was off, Sharon smiled at him while picking up the folders and files.

“Well... Hill and Sam are still in Fraser’s interrogation. Tony and Bruce are tracking back the security breach. Natasha and Clint took over my place in training since I’m busy with other things. So...”

Basically, what happened was that when Tony asked who would be taking this mission, everyone stepped back, and I was the only idiot at the front. Steve shook his head internally.

“In that case.” Sharon gave him the usual confident wink. “I’m glad. It’s been forever since we shared a mission.” She grinned. “Last time almost cost me my career.”

“Yeah...um...lucky, things sorted out on that one...” He was a little embarrassed but still grateful for Sharon’s help during the Civil War chaos.

“I’m kidding with you, okay?” Sharon teased. “It’s not like I almost got into federal prison or anything.” She sighed a little, lowering her voice: “Although, I wouldn’t have minded if I had to.” She said with a soft voice and a sparkle in her eyes, looking at Steve with sincerity, which made him stiffen.

“So, how have you been?” Steve nodded and asked with a polite smile, pressing the elevator button for her as they headed to the cafeteria floor. “How does it feel to be at the UN? I heard the benefits are better than the CIA, though unfortunately, you’ll need to deal with us again.”

"Ah, I don’t know what you're talking about," Sharon said with a wink, grinning playfully. "Every agent’s dream, right? Dealing with the Avengers, working alongside the great Captain America... even if, well, my boss would rather face another alien army than deal with the politics of this initiative."

“Well, that’d make two of us.” Steve chuckled, and opened the cafeteria door for her.

The hum of chatter and the clinking of dishes filled the air. The compound’s cafeteria was large, efficient, and—much to Steve’s relief—quiet at this time of day. It was near lunchtime, but still a little early for food service, so the air was full of a coffee’s aroma that lingered from breakfast. They got in line for coffee and a quick snack, and Sharon gave him a sideways glance, her expression teasing as she grabbed a sandwich.

“Oh wow, you guys have affogato as dessert? I could consider getting back to work with you guys just for your catering service.” Sharon said, breaking the brief silence as they moved along the counter.

“Well, if you consider that, I could make my best effort to get your agent’s number back.” Steve grinned, grabbing just a cup of coffee.

“Oh yes, lucky number, huh?” She stopped for a second as she laughed and said, “Remember that place we went to… Venice? What was it called, the best affogato in the world.”

“Benicio’s?” Steve nodded. “Yeah… it’s closed now. I mean, gone during the Blip, hopefully reopened now.”

“You didn’t have the affogato, though,” Sharon said with a playful hint in her voice. “Mr. ‘I don’t know how to relax since I got into a fight with Stark and we’re on the run.’”

“Hey, I was the international most wanted. I think it was okay for me just to stay out of the loop. Imagine if I got caught because of ice cream. That would’ve been…”

“Funny? Quite a story to tell? Best date I’ve ever had?” Sharon shrugged.

“...Embarrassing.” Steve said with a smile. “Or awkward, or even humiliating.”

Sharon shook her head and laughed. They found a table by the window, where sunlight poured in, and Steve took a seat across from her. He could see the curiosity in Sharon’s eyes, the slight hesitation before she spoke again.

“It really was, actually. One of my top three dates.” Her smile turned more serious, her voice low enough that only Steve could hear over the ambient noise. “Too bad it ended so… abruptly.”

Steve wanted to say, "We would never have made it too far", but he only sighed.

He didn’t want to dismiss her feelings, and he couldn’t deny that something had existed between them. It was brief, but also real. A shared history they couldn’t quite forget or ignore.

Sharon was strong, smart, and capable—someone he admired deeply and cared about. He appreciated her confidence and her courage, but that connection, though meaningful, was nothing compared to what he felt for you now.

That had been a stream. With you, it was tides, waves, the entire ocean.

“We made a good team.” Steve said with a smile, being honest and looking directly into her eyes.

Something about it made Sharon hold her breath.

She could remember moments in the past when Steve had the same effect on her. He would just gaze at her, and her heartbeat would skip or beat too fast.

Maybe that’s why she hadn’t pushed harder when it didn’t work. If she had fallen, completely and madly, as she’d wanted to, the power he held over her would have been overwhelming.

She had risked her entire career just to help him, and they were… nothing. Just a kiss, just some kisses or dates. So what would have happened if they’d continued? She couldn’t imagine a life where she had so little discipline about her feelings, mind, or heart.

“I know.” Sharon spoke softly, still holding his gaze. She was taking a leap of faith now. Cause she couldn’t help to wonder—could it have worked?

What if…they gave it another chance? They didn’t have the menace of the universe’s destruction now, the chances of Steve (or her) being a fugitive again were none after Thanos, so what… what if…?

“But…” She began, but Steve suddenly turned as something caught his attention.

It was lunchtime, and the employees began to arrive at the cafeteria, you among them, with Dr. Lin at your right and John Walker at your left.

“Captain Walker, I really don’t need a date. I have a boyfriend, no, um… fiancé.” You said as you picked up a tray and started serving lunch on your plate, remembering how Steve just highlighted this morning that the ring was indeed, a ring.

“It’s John.” Said a very cheerful John Walker, who was not stepping back from asking you out, even though you had been determined and clear about your “NO”s and reasons.

“Well, does this fiancé have a name? And where’s the ring?” he said while picking lunch and placing food, walking backward with a gracious wink.

“OH MY GOD!” You and Dr. Lin said at the same time, your eyes widening as you noticed the ring was missing from your finger.

“Where’s the ring? D…did you lose the ring?!” Robert was panicking. Did you just lose the engagement ring Captain America gave you?!

“I don’t know, it was on my finger...” You were looking in your lab coat pockets and in your clothes.

“It’s a tracking device, equipped with the last of Stark technology, how...how can you lose a tracking device?!” Dr. Lin couldn’t believe it.

“Your boyfriend put a tracking device on you?” John hmph'd with a laugh. “What a douchebag!” He put a hand on his chest. “I promise, I would never do such a manipulative, controlling freak thing to you.” He winked. “I’ll look out for other guys who come close, of course, but that’s another level of jerkiness. Ugh...a tracking device, what is he, a psychopath?”

“It’s an engagement ring,” you replied, frowning, though you didn’t think of giving out too much information to him. You thought back to the last time you saw the ring, which was before you took it off when you entered the UN HQ.

You pulled out your phone, wanting to send a message to Steve just to confirm.

Some strands of hair curved in front of you when you looked down, and John, who was standing in front of you, couldn’t help but stretch out his hand and brush them to your shoulder. His fingers ran through your hair, and his fingertips touched your ear as he accommodated it for you.

Before you could react, a loud crash echoed through the cafeteria, like the sound of a broken cup or mug.

Sharon stood in shock as Steve slammed his cup down so hard the porcelain shattered. His face was livid, veins bulging in his neck, and his fists clenched so tightly his knuckles were white.

He abruptly stood, the chair scraping loudly behind him, and stormed in your direction.

"I've got it, babe." Steve said. He didn’t miss a moment of the interaction and was at your side in an instant. He took your hand, his eyes locked on John Walker, and carefully slid the ring back onto your finger. “It was in the pocket of your gear.”

Both captains exchanged tense, serious looks. You could feel the sparks fly between them as they made eye contact, and after a long moment, Steve finally smiled.

“I’m guessing you're here as a representative of the New Era’s Project, Captain Walker?” He said, placing a firm hand on your waist, his grip tightening slightly.

“Yes.” John replied with a polite but sneering smile.

“The knowledge exchanges from R&D have been…quite enlightening. I can’t wait to see what the best of your team has to offer…to me.” He said as he raised his jaw and tilted his head toward you. You could feel Steve’s body tense, like a bow stretched to its full capacity and ready to snap back.

"Take whatever gear or armory you want, Walker," Steve said in a cold, measured voice, as the entire cafeteria fell silent, all eyes locked on the tension between the two men.

"But the best of this compound is far beyond your reach. And don’t think for a second that you could ever put a finger on that." His voice dropped to a dangerous whisper, teeth clenched. Touch my girl’s hair again, and I’ll cut your arm off.

"Steve." A calm voice cut through the tension as Commander Hill appeared at the doorway. She walked in with steady confidence. "We’ve got news. I need you and Dr. Lancaster in the Command Room."

Steve didn’t immediately move. His gaze lingered on Walker for a few more seconds, with unspoken warnings in his eyes. Then, without a word, he turned to you, gently taking your hand in his, and led you out of the cafeteria. The weight of Walker’s stare followed behind you both, but your focus stayed fixed on your fiance's figure.

No one spoke in the hallway as you walked toward the Command Room. You could see Steve’s rigid expression. He was pissed, his jaw tight, shoulders tense as if holding back more words.

But you were… well, trying your best to hide the curve of your lips. Just like he had back in the car when you sobbed that you’d go to Wakanda and talk to plants for the rest of your life if he ever left you to go back to his gorgeous ex.

Oh, so he was this jealous? Even a little possessive? He got this mad just because a guy touched your hair? Now, if Steve were any other guy, maybe this would seem like a giant red flag, but this was the love of your life, so…

You slid your hand into his palm, pressing your skin to his, and intertwined your fingers with his.

Steve’s expression softened, and he looked at you, letting out a quiet sigh. He smiled when you mouthed, I love you.

Commander Hill, however, wasn’t in the mood for your lovebird moments. Her face remained stern as she waited for the door to close behind you, sealing the room.

"Agent Frazer was found dead this morning."

The words hung in the air like a punch to the gut. Steve’s hand tightened around yours as his expression shifted from softened warmth to immediate alertness.

You lowered your sight.

Somehow, you had a feeling this was coming anytime soon. It was weird, though. Agent Frazer was not your brother; he just pretended to be for some time (and then actually tried to brainwash slash attack you). But for a moment, you wished that had been true, that your brother was alive, even if he had been turned against you. So now he is dead, and you feel strangely sad.

Your way of dealing with it? Throw yourself into the facts.

“How?” you asked, almost mechanically. “Was it because… his neural synapses overloaded, triggering an energy surge that short-circuited his cerebral cortex in under a millisecond? Like… like someone or something… wired his brain to self-destruct?”

Maria’s eyes widened, and she gave a quick, silent nod.

Steve’s grip tightened, haunted by your words. At that moment, he panicked, cold sweat through his shirt, fear dominating his senses when the possibility of losing you suddenly struck hard in his mind. So, could anyone do that? Snap their fingers and cause you a brain dead?

His body was merely processing under this thought. He felt the urge to hug you, to feel your warmth and heartbeat under his skin, to feel you entirely safe in his arms. But you were in the command room, so he didn’t move.

“Can we make sure that…” His voice trembled slightly. “What happened to Frazer…” doesn’t happen to you?

Commander Hill noted his panic, so she gave him some time to process.

“Oh no.” You noticed too, so you reassured him, squeezing his hand back: “That won’t happen to me. I’ve only been through one brainwash. It takes more than that—multiple processes, open surgery. And Hydra… they didn’t have the tech to pull it off. Not back then.”

“But…” Your mind raced ahead, piecing things together. “Whoever did this? They’re desperate.”

You rubbed your forehead, and as your hands dropped, Maria noticed it: that look on your face.

The same intense, calculating look Steve wore when he was seeing things no one else could—analyzing every possibility, tracing out the most brilliant, cunning plan, whether on a battlefield or at a table of white collars and power brokers.

“Jarvis, any chance Bruce and Tony are in the crib?” You needed to process your ideas, but you also needed someone who could remember everything you’d said.

“They are on their way here, Dr. Lancaster.” answered the A.I. “Crossing the elevator’s door at this moment.” said Jarvis as both entered the room.

“Please tell me you already have a preliminary conclusion?” said Tony, stepping into the room.

“Okay…” You stood in the middle, your mind moving faster than words as you started laying out the analysis.

“They have access to Hydra files—there’s no other way to explain it. Clearance levels that aren’t just high for regulars; files that were locked, or used to be locked, behind old S.H.I.E.L.D. encryption. And the remains of my file? Only a few could access those after Hydra was dismantled.”

Tony leaned back against the wall, arms crossed, tracking your every movement. Bruce sat at the edge of a table, hands loosely folded, but his furrowed brow betrayed his concern.

“So, leftover Hydra goons or former S.H.I.E.L.D. agents?” Tony asked. He didn't want to say it aloud, but there was also another possibility: a breach, here, inside the Avengers.

“Or both.” Steve raised an eyebrow. “Ex-S.H.I.E.L.D. operatives who went dark when Hydra fell. People who know how to stay hidden but had deep ties to the old Hydra infrastructure.”

“Even if they had the files, they’d need money. A lot of it, if they’re working with the kind of tech that got into Frazer’s head.” Bruce said, swiping through the files on the screen.

“Yeah, this doesn’t sound like some underground merc group.” Maria said, standing beside him as she watched the files on the main screen.

“This is serious, billionaire-level investment. Whoever’s backing them has access to bleeding-edge tech. Retinal implants, memory manipulation… that’s not standard black-market operation. The kind of power they’re throwing around is something only the Avengers or S.H.I.E.L.D. had access to—the old S.H.I.E.L.D. when they were still around.”

“So, they’re gearing up for something big, or they’re hitting a wall. What are they trying to accomplish? Why use Frazer as a puppet?” Tony followed the line of thought.

You hesitated: “I think… They’re close to something. A breakthrough, maybe. Or…” You stopped and narrowed your eyes, thinking aloud. “Or they’re failing. Desperate. They’re making bold moves because they need something critical. And that something is… me.”

Steve’s expression shifted. His fingers locked onto yours, tightly.

“The attack was directed at you. Frazer was pretending to be your brother. And to confirm your existence.” Tony sighed, frustrated and feeling a pang of guilt. He hid you all these years, thinking you would be safe. He should have let you out of the New Eras Project. The Avengers had so many ways of detecting enemies without using your powers. Fuck, he should have listened to Steve when he warned him to let you out of the Project.

“Of the twelve of you, you’re the only one with… those powers.” Steve murmured, almost clenching his teeth. He felt the urge to hug you, as if you were going to disappear or vanish in the next second.

“And a success case.” You said, not wanting to scare him but knowing you all needed the entire picture. “The only survivor, the only… prototype. Still alive. In my body is the source code for why these experiments or creations worked.”

“Wait…” Tony’s glare was fixed on you. “If the endgame is to copy your ability… What could they even use that for?” But it was a self-answering conversation. He was just thinking aloud: “…a soldier who could walk into a building and identify every weak point before the first shot is fired. Or worse, detect something we’ve built to be undetectable.”

“Why stop there, Tony?” Maria’s expression was serious and cold. “Why would there be only one? Hydra made a dozen back then, and they didn’t even have half the tech we have now.”

Bruce frowned deeper, his voice low: “If they’re that close, then we’re on borrowed time. They’ve already brainwashed Frazer, and now they’re playing with neural implants and synaptic overrides.”

“Exactly.” You nodded. “And they are so desperate, they don’t care if we know they’re out there now, because they’re so close they can taste it. Once they succeed, they won’t even fear the Avengers’ powers anymore.”

Tony exhaled sharply, his glare cold. “So, they’re building something. A super soldier, or an army of them—enhanced with tech that would let them see through just about anything.”

“And they’re not far from getting there. But for now, I’m still the key to unlocking that power.”

The room went quiet for a moment as the weight of your words settled in.

“Well, isn’t that just fantastic.” Tony applauded, the whole thing giving him a headache. “We’ve got super soldiers with x-ray vision on the horizon. And they’ve got you in their crosshairs.”

“So basically, we need to see what triggered this sudden desperation.” Bruce leaned forward, and his mind began to analyze: “We could scan for energy centralization around the globe. Human creation needs vast electromagnetic fields to power high-level bioengineering, especially when manipulating neural pathways at this scale. We need to track when or where all this is happening. But…”

His voice was tense.

“I’ve got a feeling they’re at the door already. Because whatever they’re building… they’re almost done.”

The way back home was silent. You could feel the atmosphere heavy with unspoken tension. Steve hadn’t said much since you left the command room. His usual warmth and quiet strength seemed overshadowed by something deeper—fear and anxiety, clunging over him like a dark shadow, haunting him at his heels.

You wanted to speak, but your mind was processing too. You were trying to remember everything you knew about yourself and your siblings, every memory, every piece of paper you’d seen in Hydra labs, every layer of analysis they’d made you go through.

The ride home was silent, his jaw tight, his gaze fixed on the road, even your house slash lab was after all the securities protocols and protective layers Maria had put, he was still alert, as if there were something in the grass and trees of the compound that would attack anytime. You could feel the weight of his thoughts, pressing down like a storm waiting to break.

"Babe there's no need…" You said as Steve moved around the house once you've arrived.

He checked every window, every door, securing them with an almost obsessive care. He paused at the front door, his hand lingering on the lock as if it was the only thing standing between you and the threat he couldn’t control.

You watched him, knowing that this wasn’t just about protecting you—it was about the fear within him.

"Steve, I'm here." You stopped him. Placing your hand on his back: "I'm here. With you."

He turned to you, his face pale. His eyes were haunted, wide with the kind of fear you rarely saw in him. He’s worried.

No, not worried, he’s terrified.

Without a word, he pulls you into his arms, wrapping them tightly around you like you might disappear if he let go. His grip is firm, desperate, as trying to shield you from an invisible danger that only he can see.

His breath is uneven, and you can feel the tension radiating from him. For a man who has faced down gods, monsters, the end of the universe, this kind of fear is new to him. It’s not the enemy outside he fears—it’s the thought of losing you, of failing to protect you. Again.

You don’t say anything at first. Words won’t soothe him. So you just hold him back, resting your head against his chest, listening to the rapid beat of his heart. Slowly, you lifted your hands to gently press them on his neck, cupping his face to make him look at you.

"I'm here. And we will be ok." You say softly.

These words made him tremble. Will you? How can you be sure? How could he know? What if…

He couldn’t imagine what he’d do if he lost you.

“I won’t let them take you.” He said, as a sacred oath, tatooed in his soul. “I’m going to set up more protocols.” He muttered, pulling back just enough to look into your eyes, his expression one of steely resolve beneath the worry. “More security. I’ll have Tony upgrade the system. I’ll have guards outside. I’ll—”

You stayed still in his arms, feeling the rawness of his fear. His body was tense, and you could feel the tremble in his muscles, the weight of his panic pressing against you. He wasn’t just holding you for comfort—he was holding you like you were the last solid thing in a world that was quickly unraveling.

“Steve,” you interrupted softly, placing a hand on his chest. “You can’t protect me from everything.”

His eyes locked onto yours. “I can try. And I will.”

"Babe…this is the Avengers compound. This is…the safest place on earth. Or even the universe."

"It took only one protocol. One permission. Approved by me." He said with teeth clenched. "I gave him clearance. One, to bring Frazer in front of you, I won't ever, ever let that happen again." He said with conviction, his expressions somber as he remembered everything you went through.

But beneath his determination, you could see the cracks: the anxiety gnawing away at him, the overwhelming fear that no matter what he did, it might not be enough.

"Steve…"

“You don’t understand…” His voice is strained, thick with the fear that he hasn’t been able to shake since the moment he realized you were being targeted. “I’ve seen too much. I’ve lost too many. If something happens to you—”

He pauses.

“I can’t lose you.” He whispered, his voice barely audible. He was a man made of iron will and conviction, but here he stood, vulnerable and raw, stripped bare of all his usual defenses.

“Hey, hey, hey…Listen.” You said, holding his face in your hands, forcing him to meet your gaze. “I’m here. Right here. I’m not going anywhere. I'm here, with you, I'm safe.”

He looks at you and feels a pang of pain to your innocent even naive words.

Safe? Were you safe when he was on the other side of the wall and couldn't do anything but watch as you almost fell under Frazer's brainwash? Were you safe when you pressed a tranquilizer to yourself?

The memory of you in his arms, unconcious and slipping away was so vivid.

His hands tightened around you again at that thought, his grip shaking slightly. “I just... I can’t stop thinking about it.” He admitted, his voice strained. “What if I can’t get to you in time? What if something happens and I’m not there? What if…”

“I can’t take that risk.” He mutters, more to himself than to you. “ I can't. I won’t let anything happen to you. Not again.”

You pull back just enough to look up at him, your hands resting on his chest. His blue eyes are filled with a vulnerability you’ve only seen in rare moments— when the weight of the world is too much, even for him.

“Steve.” You say soft but firmly: “We’ll get through this. Together.”

For a long moment, he just looks at you, his eyes searching yours, as if trying to find reassurance in the depths of your gaze. Slowly, he exhales, but he doesn’t let go. That deep-rooted terror of losing you, isn't going away anytime soon.

His arms remain wrapped around you, protective and unyielding, as though he’s made a silent vow that nothing—no person, no secret organization, no force on Earth or beyond—will ever take you away from him.

If only that could be true.

THE End but TBC

Continue to Chapter 10: Eclipse

Alright I'm SO SORRY I'm late!! 2 Full time jobs really is consuming me!! I hope you enjoyed it!! Sooooo I have a really serious question RN, could you doooo me the favor to lmk your thoughts!!

Tag list: @vioplay19 / @jamneuromain / @steviebbboi / @heletsmelovehim / @otterlycanadian / hisredheadedgoddess28

*can you let me know if I've missed anyone in the taglist? thanks <3

#captain america x reader #steve rogers x ofc #steve rogers x reader #captain america x you #chris evans fanfiction #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x female reader #captain america x ofc #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers fluff #chris evans characters

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mrs-snape5984 · 7 months ago

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“There is a light and it never goes out…”

“Take me out tonight. Oh, take me anywhere, I don't care, I don’t care, I don’t care…” (“There’s a light that never goes out” by The Smiths)

Overstimulation. Disorientation. Light sensitivity. Chronic pain. Fatigue. These are only a few of those symptoms, which are torturing me day in and day out for the past two years, already. Due to them, caused by a disease, that is called “Myalgic encephalomyelitis/chronic fatigue syndrome” (ME/CFS), I’m currently forced to live a life within the strict confines of my dark and silent room, mostly enduring my daily existence in solitude.

I miss being a part of this world….and fuck, I miss being a part of other people’s lives! Living like this makes me feel like an old piece of furniture, which has been stored away in a hidden chamber…not worthy enough to be used or seen by anyone, and yet still not bad enough to be discarded.

Some months ago, two wonderful people started taking me out to see their worlds by sending me pictures and videos of the places, they’re heading to. Thanks to them, I’m allowed to get a glimpse of places, I’ve always dreamed of being able to explore them on my own.

Furthermore, something else became apparent whenever one of these precious gems of human nature took me with them: I wasn’t just carried around in their phones, but they carried me in their hearts. This realisation blew my mind! It’s not only me, who’s clinging to them as if they’re my lifelines…no, this little German mess, that I am, became important to these people, too! Words can’t express how grateful I am for our connections…and that I was also lucky enough to find true love in this bond (I love you, R. 🖤).

One of those amazing people is my beloved sister in Christ @vulnus-sanare, who will soon come to visit me in my small world. Finally, I’ll be the one, who can show her the beauty of the tiniest things in my environment…always surrounded by the securing gloominess of the nights. Magda, my heart, I’m going to introduce you to the stars above my town, to the soothing sounds of the Moselle River right next to my house and I hope, we will manage to experience the mesmerising dance of the bats in the vineyards, if we take my wheelchair with us. I can’t wait to have you here and pull you into the tightest of all embraces, sweetie!

I’ve commissioned my dear friend @snake-queen7 to create this breathtaking piece of art of Severus and my undeniably self-inserted OC Jules on a nocturnal walk through the vineyards behind my house. Before I caught ME/CFS, I used to enjoy these nightly strolls in order to watch the bats with my children, so I sent her a photo of the exact spot, I want to share with Magda. Since it was Severus and Snapedom, which brought us together, it’s only fair to bring our beloved dungeon bat to this special place as well.

My friend, I’m more than happy with the outcome of your artwork and it’s a pleasure to share it with all those lovely people of our Snapedom. Please take my apologies for taking so long to write this post, but I wanted to honour your work the way, it deserves to be honoured. For this reason, I had to wait patiently for a moment, when my brain wouldn’t refuse me to do its job (brain fog is such a pain in the ass!). Thank you for everything, Natalia! 🥹

🖤Severus & Julia🖤

🖤Sevy & Jules🖤

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icarusflewsworld · 2 months ago

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Rhysand & Cassian & Azriel X OC

Hello, here is the chapter 13 of a fanfiction on the world of Acotar where our three favorite Batboys are the mates of a single woman.

Thank you for readings, I love you guys ❤️❤️

Feel free to tell me what you think about the direction the story is taking! Thanks for reading, voting and for your comments. You brighten my day.

! Don't forget to read the previous chapters ! : Here

Happy reading!

Chapter 13

The three Illyrians walked with stress and apprehension towards Luxiana's room. They passed through the corridors of the Moonstone palace, and although they hadn't seen them for a long time, they didn't take the time to detail them or remember them. They were far too busy trying to anticipate the discussion they were going to have with their soul sister, imagining everything that might happen, everything they should say.

Rhysand was scared to death. He was a Fae high lord, he hadn't had an easy life, but he'd never been more stressed than since he'd met his soul mate. He didn't think he could ever be more anxious than he was now. He hoped with all his heart that they would succeed in calming her down and making her forgive them. He just wanted to finally get to know her. He just wanted to be able to spend time with her. He knew he should have given her some time. He should have had this talk with her tomorrow or when she wanted to have it, when she was more relaxed, but he was just in such a hurry to know that she didn't hate him anymore. He didn't want her to go to sleep pissed off at him. Not on her first night with him, and never after.

Azriel walked with a tense, robotic gait, almost limping. He dreaded this future encounter with every fiber of his being. His muscles were painfully contracted, his throat tight and his stomach oppressed. No matter how many deep breaths he took, nothing calmed him. His brain even began to hurt from the shadows around him, whispering things in his ear without interruption. "Where is she?", "our soul mate", "where?", "we must have her near". He should be used to them by now, but lately they'd been so insistent. Ever since he'd met Luxiana, the voices had been silent only when he was close to her. When she wasn't within sight, his shadows claimed her, constantly, preventing him from even getting to sleep. Usually, they knew everything about everyone, but not about Luxiana. Her shadows either refused to tell him anything about his soul mate, or they really didn't know anything about her. His shadows couldn't even smell her, know where she was or what she was doing, who she was with. No matter how hard he tried, how much he wanted to, how much he concentrated his power, he could never get any information. He just couldn't. And that wasn't possible. This had never happened to Azriel. He could have gone completely mad, but when Luxiana was around, everything fell silent. When she was around, he was so at peace.

Cassian walked with his hands in his pockets, almost whistling with excitement. Of course he wanted Luxiana to forgive them. He wanted her to regain her characteristic cheerfulness and good humor, which she seemed to have all the time except since she'd been here. But at the same time... He loved it so much when she was upset, he loved it when she hated them. It awakened something in him, something tender that made his heart melt because she was so cute, but it also awakened something primal, something he didn't want to hold back. So, although he could feel his brothers' anguish, he was quite relaxed, because in any case, his soul mate was there. She was safe with them. She was close to them and she was their soul mate. He wanted to jump out of joy. It didn't matter what happened during this discussion, whether she forgave them or hit them, because either way, Cassian would love it and enjoy the moment.

They arrived at the large bedroom door and stopped in front of it, doubtful. Rhysand glanced at his brothers and, under Cassian's encouraging nod, took a deep breath and knocked. A few seconds passed as they waited for their soul sister to open the door with a growing ball of anxiety, but no one came.

Cassian, Rhysand and Azriel glanced at each other in confusion and concern, frowning. Cassian knocked on the door, a little louder than Rhysand this time, but still no answer. "Perhaps she's fallen asleep?" he observed, detailing the entrance to the room as if an answer were written there.

Azriel blew out a laugh. "Considering how upset she was, it seems surreal to me that she dozed off after that."

Rhysand looked down, realizing with some disappointment. "Maybe she just doesn't want to open the door and see us."

Cassian didn't like the mixture of feelings simmering in his chest, echoing the disappointment he and his brothers felt. Were they really going to leave without getting what they'd gone for? No. "Never mind, she'll only be more upset," he said before opening the bedroom door uninvited.

Azriel winced as he tried to stop him, but Cassian dodged him to enter the room.

"Cassian, no," Rhysand chided him curtly, but his brother had already entered.

Rhysand and Azriel swore. Luxiana was going to hate them even more now. They followed him almost at a run, adrenalin pulsing through their vessels. They intended to grab Cassian by the scruff of the neck and pull him out against his will. They stopped beside him, ready to extricate him, but they were tense, their shoulders slightly raised, expecting to receive tons of insults or things thrown in their faces by their soulmate. But they froze in the middle of the room, receiving nothing. Only silence greeted them.

They looked around apprehensively, almost expecting to see Luxiana tetanized by shock somewhere, but they didn't see her. They gradually widened their eyelids before moving their eyes frantically, starting to turn on themselves. "What the hell?" cried Cassian, running into the room to lift the sheets and look under the bed.

"Luxiana," Rhysand called as he ran to the bathroom, but the door was open and she wasn't inside either. Rhysand began to panic. What if one of his enemies had found a way to penetrate his defenses and had attacked Luxiana? His heart began to leap wildly in his chest and he began to tremble.

Azriel reflexively cast his shadows as far around him as possible, scanning every inch of the house as if they could detect his soul mate, when in fact they couldn’t. He looked behind every piece of furniture to make sure she wasn't hiding there either. The air refused to enter his lungs. Where was she? Was she hurt?

Cassian caught his hair in both fists as he spun around, detailing every corner of the room, even the ceiling. He could feel himself dying. He'd have been happy in every case except the one where his soulmate disappeared. Damn it, had they got the wrong room? No, impossible, it was the one he'd put her in earlier. The one between his and Rhys's and the one facing Az's.

Rhysand and Azriel ran to the door to search for her elsewhere in the house, thinking that they might not have felt her leave. Thinking that perhaps she'd managed to outwit the protection and surveillance spells they'd placed around. But as they passed Cassian's side, the Illyrian with the red siphons stopped spinning to freeze and hiccupped in surprise. The other two Illyrians turned to face him.

Cassian was breathless. He stared at the bedroom's large bay window with eyes wide with awe. It was fully open and the cool wind was blowing inside, waltzing the dark blue lace curtains towards them. He took a step towards the small balcony before running towards it, imagining the worst.

Rhysand and Azriel understood too. Their hearts rose in their throats and their breaths were cut off. What if she'd fallen? They ran, wavering, towards Cassian. They arrived in front of the silver barricade where they placed their hands, clutching at it to keep from faltering. They leaned forward, almost capsizing in the void, to look down in growing fear that their soulmate had crashed to the ground, but all they could see was the abyssal drop several kilometers long, whose darkness of night prevented them from seeing very far.

Rhysand was scared to death. He'd been wrong earlier. He'd never been as stressed and scared as he was now. He was completely tetanized and couldn't even breathe. He had no composure. He was panicking. He couldn't think. He didn't know what to do.

Azriel gripped the railing so tightly that it deformed into the shape of his fingers. He frantically moved his gaze around in search of his soul mate. What the hell was going on? Why did nothing ever go as planned with this woman? He was so scared his eyes were burning. If something had happened to her, what would he do?

Cassian leaned on the fence to climb over and jump. He let himself fall into the void, hoping with all his might not to see Luxiana's corpse at the foot of the mountain. He was trembling and almost didn't want to flap his wings to stop his fall.

Rhysand and Azriel joined their brother, flapping their wings to take flight and then sticking them to their backs to dive steeply to the ground. But Cassian noticed something on the mountainside. He opened his wings suddenly, stopping in mid-fall, looking with squinted eyes to better analyze the green and white dot moving on the rock a few meters from them. He opened his mouth wide, unable to believe what he was seeing and feeling downright hallucinatory. "Is this some kind of fucking joke?" he shouted.

Rhysand and Azriel stopped in the air beside him, staring at his expression for a second without understanding, before turning to look at what he was seeing. They turned white, feeling as if they too were having a nightmare, completely shocked.

Over there, in the distance, someone was climbing the mountain. Or rather, de-climbing. Someone was descending the mountain, clinging to the fragile, crumbly stones protruding from the wall. A person with a green dress and a bun of white hair. Luxiana.

"What's she doing there?" shouted Rhysand so loudly that the sound echoed through the valley.

A drop of sweat trickled down Luxiana's forehead. Despite the fairly cool temperature, she was dead hot from the effort. She hadn't anticipated that the holds would be so few and so fragile, yet they were. She was having a bit of trouble, but nothing she couldn't overcome. Anyway, she'd already climbed something even worse. Her hands ached from clinging so tightly to tiny bits of mountain, and her muscles trembled.

Suddenly, she came to a halt, flattening herself against the mountain. Had she just heard the voice of the lord of the night court, or had she been dreaming? She looked left and right in panic. She'd been waiting for dinner to pass and for them to dismiss her for the night in her room so she could have all that time to get down the mountain and send a message to Feyre. There was no way the lord would know she was running away, right? Had he installed defenses and spells to guard her that she hadn't found and circumvented?

Azriel twirled, a flash of anger and madness electrocuted him from top to bottom. Did she really want to die or what? She could fall! He was mad with rage. "She's taking the piss out of me?!" He rushed towards her, flying at breakneck speed, flapping his wings with all his might.

Cassian and Rhysand followed.

Hearing all the noises behind, Luxiana turned her head to see three angry Illyrians rushing towards her. She hiccupped in surprise, jumping so sharply that her fingers slipped from her grip on the rock. She turned her head, eyes wide, her heart missing a beat. She tried to grab hold of the mountain, slamming her hands against the wall, but she couldn't grasp anything. She fell off the cliff. She screamed at the top of her lungs, realizing that her body was in freefall and that she was about to crash to the ground. She flailed her arms and legs in all directions to find a hold and catch herself. Would the Illyrians save her? She wasn't going to die like that, was she? But she stopped screaming, closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She hadn't felt this way in a long time. This peace. This freedom.

Azriel, Cassian and Rhysand's hearts stopped in fear as they saw their mate fall, paralyzing them for a microsecond before starting up again wildly, urging them to catch her before she crashed to the ground. They rushed towards her, trembling, eyes burning, stomachs turning.

Azriel was the fastest and the first to reach her. With one arm, he grabbed Luxiana by the pelvis, but with the other hand, he grabbed the back of her skull to hold her steady and prevent her from breaking her neck at the sudden stop of the fall. He pinned her to his chest as Luxiana groaned in relief. She wrapped her legs around Azriel's hips and her arms around his neck, clinging to him a little tighter, holding him. Azriel straightened up, pivoting upwards, skimming the ground only a few meters away. He flapped his wings hastily to return to the room they'd just left, unable even to rejoice at the proximity of his soul mate, still reeling from what had just happened, as if his body were anesthetized.

Luxiana was even more dishevelled, but her heart calmed. She'd almost died, no big deal, especially since it hadn't happened so many times to her already. So everything was fine.

Azriel landed on the balcony and grabbed Luxiana's hips. He pushed her back almost brutally, as if Luxiana's body was burning him, forcing her to land on her feet. He grabbed her shoulders. "What the hell were you doing there???" he shouted in her face, shaking her lightly back and forth.

Luxiana breathed loudly and exaggeratedly as she began to smile. She put her hands on her hips, still breathless from what had just happened.

But Cassian and Rhysand joined them, landing heavily beside them. Cassian ran towards Luxiana, nudging Azriel with his shoulder to make him let go of his soul mate and take his place face to face with her. He began to observe the blonde frantically, looking for wounds, his eyes burning. She was human, she could die if a scratch got infected. He grabbed the blonde's arms and lifted them to peer underneath. He turned her to look at her back, then turned her back to face him again to look at her legs, barely noticing that she'd ripped off the bottom of her dress to shorten her petticoats so as not to be disturbed on the way down.

Luxiana let him do so, frowning and casting a confused glance at Rhysand and Azriel, but they were only detailing her up and down in the same way as Cassian. Were they really afraid of her being hurt? She thought the three of them were really cute, weird but cute.

Azriel, noticing no trace of blood, took a few steps away, spinning in circles, no longer holding his ground. He ran his hands through his hair, clutching it in his fists, almost tearing it off. He couldn't believe what had just happened. They couldn't believe it.

Rhysand had to crouch down. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't stand it. He couldn't stand it. They could have lost her today. They could have lost her so stupidly. They could have lost her when she was only two steps away from them, just because she wanted to... run away? He jumped to his feet, rage replacing fear. "What the fuck was that?" he swore, forgetting all convenance.

Luxiana laughed out loud, causing the three Illyrians to freeze and widen their eyes. She huffed theatrically. "That was a close one. I almost died. Nice save, thanks!"

None of the three Illyrians could believe it. She was taking it so lightly when she'd almost died that it seemed surreal.

Rhysand was completely paralyzed, staring at her with wide eyes, still trying to recover from his emotions and what had just happened. He was still shaking and she was laughing and acting as if nothing had happened.

Cassian was equally flabbergasted. He'd been so scared he felt like throwing up. But he detailed her again to make sure she really wasn't hurt. He huffed as he took a few steps back. Hearing her laugh reassured him, despite everything. She wasn't dead, but she could have been. What the hell was she doing there? He began to realize, anger pulsing through his body. He breathed rapidly and noisily.

Azriel imploded. His muscles felt like they were painfully compressing his bones, and his heart ached. It hurt so much. He'd been so scared. He exploded. He turned to Luxiana, breaking the distance between them in the blink of an eye.

He grabbed her throat, simply resting his fingers loosely on her skin. He pushed her to tackle her gently to the wall of the building, right next to the bay window. "Are you completely insane? You could have died! What the hell were you doing on that fucking mountain, Luxiana?" he shouted, searching for an answer in his soulmate's eyes, or at least a little lucidity.

She hadn't even blinked when he'd thrown himself at her, and she'd smiled when he'd tackled her to the wall. She just stared at him with big eyes full of interest. As if she couldn't wait to find out what he was going to do next. As if she was gauging his reaction. But the truth was that the proud, confident look she'd taken on was to hide the fact that she was aroused by Azriel's movement and proximity.

Cassian rushed at Azriel, putting his hand on his brother's shoulder. He was about to pull him back and punch him in the face for daring to grab his soulmate by the throat and tackle her to the wall, but he stopped when he saw Luxiana's expression. She was smiling and didn't even seem a little perturbed; on the contrary, she seemed intrigued. She detailed them both with shining eyes and a tilted head. There was no fear in her gaze. No doubt. Yet she should. Not that Cassian wanted to intimidate or scare her, but she was surrounded by three powerful, angry Illyrians. She didn't know them and they had a reputation as cruel faes. She should be frightened. Anyone would be scared. But not her. As if she had nothing to fear from them. As if she had complete control over the situation.

Rhysand placed his hands on his face, a little more violently than necessary, before rubbing it vigorously. His soul mate was going to kill him. He was going to have a heart attack because of her, he was sure of it. He'd never experienced so many different emotions so intensely as he had in the last twenty-four hours. He was exhausted. He ran his hands through his hair, then intertwined his fingers together to hold the back of his neck. He looked up at Luxiana. His heart was finally calming, but he gritted his teeth. She was completely unconscious. Completely mad. His arms fell limply back. "Answer the question, Luxiana," he articulated coldly, regaining his high lord mask.

Luxiana set her blue eyes on Rhysand then realized, losing her smile. She wrinkled her nose and winced. She couldn't believe it. They'd found her. They'd managed to know she was out of her room, how had they done that? She rolled her eyes, blowing again. She relaxed, dropping a little more onto the wall behind her as she rested a confident gaze on Azriel. She shrugged with a smirk, "I was exercising."

Azriel let go of her abruptly. He turned and took a few steps away, his fists clenched. This woman was going to push him to his limit. He glared at her, breathing fiercely.

Cassian walked away, laughing falsely. She was mocking them. She didn't care that she'd almost died. He wasn't well. How could he protect his soul mate if she was so intent on dying?

Rhysand calmed down. There was no expression on his face, only a wintry chill. But inside, he was boiling with rage. The lava flowing through his veins could have dried up entire oceans. He moved closer to Luxiana, still leaning against the wall, detailing the three of them with the same intrigued air. Once in front of her, he placed his index finger under her chin, lifting her head, forcing her to look only at him. He leaned forward, "Don't forget that at any moment, we can bring you back and take Feyre at your place, so I strongly advise you not to cause us too much trouble, stay put and answer our fucking questions." He hated the way he'd talked to her, but if it was the only thing that would get him answers and that would help to protect his soul mate then he'd keep going.

Luxiana gritted her teeth. She remembered what had happened and how angry she was with them. She bit her tongue to keep from slapping Rhysand across the face, but she pushed away his index finger under her jaw with violence, sending the brunet's arm flying further away. She straightened up to the wall, moving a little closer to Rhysand, their faces almost brushing against each other as she glared at him.

Rhysand held back a shiver at the electricity between them and the ghostly touch of his soul mate’s skin so close to his own. He didn't show how disturbed he was, but his breathing had stopped and he swallowed hard.

She shifted to the side, extricating herself from between him and the wall to move away. She positioned herself under the bedroom window frame, crossing her arms and killing them with her eyes.

Luxiana had to move away. She'd like to think it was because she was angry with them, but it was because it was too much. She'd been far too disturbed by the proximity of Azriel, then Rhysand after him and Cassian's eyes watching her intently before all that. Her heart had begun to beat strangely and irregularly. Her body had burst into flames, tickling her all over. She knew she had an attraction to villains and found the three Illyrians sexy, but she'd always had control over how she felt, except now. "Alright, you got me, congratulations to you," she laughed curtly as she turned and stormed into the room. She couldn't forget that she'd been pissed off at them for destroying Feyre's wedding.

Cassian huffed, rolling his eyes, but finally let out a smirk. She was completely crazy. He followed her to grab her by the elbow and swivel her towards him. He opened his mouth to speak, but when he saw her face wrinkled with anger, he stopped. He huffed, unable to do anything but study Luxiana's blue pupils. She was stubborn. Being upset would only upset his soul mate even more. The discussion would go round in circles. He raised his hand to the blonde's face, resting his palm gently on her cheek.

Luxiana couldn't help closing her eyes for a second, much more comforted than she should have been by Cassian's big, warm, calloused hand on her skin. She was so exhausted after what had just happened today, but she forced herself to open her eyes again, trying not to let anything show. But Cassian and his tender smile had surely seen something.

The Illyrian's smile widened as he watched her shudder violently as he slid his fingers down her arm, caressing her skin with his fingertips to her wrist, her palm and then her fingers. He then placed this hand on Luxiana's other cheek, framing her face with his palms.

Luxiana couldn't help but take a deep, invigorating breath, completely relaxed by Cassian's warming touch.

Cassian detailed her with interest. She was so beautiful. The silver light from the palace made her pale skin glow and suited her so well. He didn't quite realize it yet. She was his soul mate and his brothers. And they'd almost lost her already. He'd just been so scared. He'd never been able to take it. "You really scared us," his voice was so soft it felt like satin was coming out of his mouth.

Luxiana, although she didn't think it was possible and was beginning to wonder if the Illyrians didn't have some superpower to relax her, calmed down another level. Her shoulders slumped. The sincerity she saw in Cassian's eyes made her heart dance. She knew it wasn't because they cared about her that they'd been frightened, and that it must have had something to do with the service she had to perform for them, but Luxiana's body couldn't help reacting. Her chest and stomach tickled. Perhaps she had gastroenteritis?

Cassian pulled her gently towards him with his grip on her cheeks, unable to do otherwise, wanting to feel her even closer to him.

She slid towards him without resistance, brushing her chest with the Illyrian's. All she could do was stare into Cassian's pupils with wide eyes, as if she was hypnotized.

Cassian smiled a little wider at this realization and his whole body vibrated with joy. "Why were you on the mountainside?" His eyebrows had furrowed a little under the worry he remembered feeling when he saw her hanging miles above the ground.

Luxiana opened her mouth several times, searching for words. She wanted to recapture the anger she had previously felt for them. She wanted to remember what they'd done today at her best friend's wedding, but she was completely drained of all negative feelings and anesthetized by Cassian's touch. All she could see were his brown, almost black eyes. They were beautiful. So deep. They made her think of pure strength, an earthquake of power, but at the same time, a shield of protection and a hug of tenderness. She was completely amazed. Cassian could ask her anything in this position, and she'd give him all the answers he wanted. "I just wanted to find a way to contact Feyre and be able to tell her that everything was okay, that you weren't torturing me like she probably thinks you are doing." Her voice was just a breath, she barely realized what she was saying. "I thought you wouldn't have realized anything. I would have been back by dawn."

Azriel gritted his teeth. He crossed his arms, taking a few steps forward so as to place himself in Cassian's vision, several meters behind Luxiana, just where he could make sure his brother saw him glowering at him. "You bastard," he spat at him via their barely accustomed telepathic link. And the fact that Cassian gave him a laughing look, pursing his lips so as not to laugh at him, irritated him thirty times over. He couldn't believe it. It was that roughneck Cassian, the roughest of them all, who'd managed to calm their soulmate down and get the answers they wanted. Since when was his brother capable of being so gentle with anyone anyway? And the way she looked at him? With her big eyes, so attentive and cute. He was dead jealous.

Rhysand felt like Azriel. He was touched for a second to see his soul mate so cute and cooperative, but her words finally got through to his brain. He understood what she had just said. He exploded, his heart sending his blood pulsing noisily in his ears. His eyes widened, he still couldn't believe it. He shouted, "You climbed down a mountainside and risked your life to send a message to Feyre ????? Just to send a message???"

Luxiana flinched a little at Rhysand's scream, blinking several times, slowly coming back to herself.

Cassian growled, glowering at his brother who had just broken the bubble of intimacy he'd established with his soulmate.

But Rhysand took no notice. He was out of himself. "And you wouldn't have come back at dawn because you'd have fallen! You'd be dead!" his voice broke at his last words. She'd be dead... He couldn't believe his ears at what she'd just said. Was she so reckless? So crazy? Was this the punishment the gods had given her for doing so many bad things? By tying him to a suicidal woman he'd have to watch break his heart? "Are you completely insane?" he shouted, unable to breathe.

Luxiana didn't like the way he talked to him. This lord thought he was allowed to do anything. How dare he call her crazy when all she wanted to do was reassure her best friend? Something she'd asked him to do and he'd refused. Something she wouldn't have had to do if he hadn't been such an asshole. An anger -which not even Cassian's warm, powerful, reassuring hands could assuage- stirred in her chest. She grabbed Cassian's wrists to make him lower his arms and release his hold on her. Luxiana shifted a few steps to the side to get a better look at Rhysand and better kill him with her eyes. "I would never have fallen! I fell because of you, because you surprised me. I was doing just fine before you came along."

"You bastard," Cassian growled at Rhysand via their link. He was angry again, but this time it was because his brother had just broken his moment with his mate. And he was quick to show it by turning back to Rhysand and glaring at him, hoping his clenched jaws gave his high lord a clue as to how he was feeling.

Azriel, relieved to see the contact between Cassian and Luxiana broken, was able to relax, but his respite was short-lived as he realized and understood his soulmate's words. She was accusing them when if they hadn't been there, she'd be dead? He spoke curtly, hoping to make her understand, anger commanding him, "You were doing just fine? You were barely clinging to a crumbly rock several kilometers off the ground. You'd have been dead if we hadn't got there in time!"

Luxiana crossed her arms, gritting her teeth and frowning. She cast a dark, sideways glance at Azriel. "You don't know that. And anyway, if I had fallen it would still have been your fault!" She turned her angry black eyes on Rhysand, "I wouldn't have had to go down that mountain if you'd at least let me say goodbye to Feyre! Besides, how did you know I was no longer in my room? Are you tracking me? Are you spying on me? What kind of spell have you cast on me?"

Guilt gradually replaced Rhysand's anger. He closed his eyes under his breath. She'd been a little right. She'd put herself in danger because of him, so she could reassure Feyre, because he'd almost kidnapped her. She could have died because of him. He reopened his eyes but almost gasped when he saw Luxiana standing in front of him, looking down at him with clenched fists, arms stretched out towards the ground and a face... so cute.

"Answer my questions!" she commanded with authority, as if she wasn't a fragile little thing next to a big, powerful fae lord. As if she was the one with the power here.

Rhysand smiled softly, but couldn't help it. He could feel her eyes shining with tenderness. He'd have liked to hide it, but she was so cute, he couldn't. He'd so much liked it to be simpler. He so wished everything were simpler. "Why do things seem so complicated with you, Luxiana?" He couldn't help saying her first name.

Luxiana crossed her arms, trying as best she could to camouflage the shiver she'd felt when he'd said her name. She squinted, "That wasn't an answer to one of my questions, it seems."

Rhysand couldn't help laughing softly under his breath. He wanted to touch her. He just wanted to touch her skin. Even with his fingertips. Even a graze he would have accepted. "No indeed, it wasn't."

Luxiana almost took that as an answer. Had they really put a spell on her to track her without her realizing it? Were they that powerful? She didn't believe it for a second, but doubt made her purse her lips. "You have no right to track me."

Azriel growled. "We've had every right to since you decided to escape to risk your life needlessly!"

She turned to face Azriel, "So what, I'm your prisoner now? Take me to a cell, then, so I know what to expect."

Azriel broke the distance between the two of them quickly, "if that's what it takes to keep you in place." He grabbed her arm and pulled her toward the bedroom exit. He wasn't exactly going to lock her in a dungeon, but he wanted her to believe it. He wanted her to panic a little so she wouldn't escape again and put her life in danger.

But inevitably, Luxiana being Luxiana, she laughed. "As if that's going to stop me escaping." She let herself be dragged along, even following him cheerfully. She knew that, in fact, it was generally easier to escape from a cell than from a room so close to these three.

Azriel froze, glaring red with anger. He opened his mouth to speak, but Rhysand stepped between them, pulling Azriel away from Luxiana and forcing him to let go. "That's enough," he said.

Cassian -who had leaned against a wall and was watching the scene with great pleasure, seeing his brothers being martyred by the little piece of woman who served as their soulmate- winced in disappointment. "Oh no," he protested, "this was just getting interesting."

Rhysand paid no attention to his brother. "I think we're all a little tired and irritable. Discussion won't lead to anything if we're in this state."

Luxiana, despite a slight contraction of her jaws, huffed and then nodded.

Azriel took a deep breath to relax. Rhysand was right, but he would take up this discussion with his mate tomorrow. It was out of the question for him that she put herself in danger again. Never again. He had to make her understand and, above all, obey. Feeling a breeze of fresh outside air caress his skin, even cooling him through his leather armor, he turned back to the bay window to close it. He didn't want Luxiana to get sick.

"Go to sleep," Rhysand gently ordered Luxiana, pointing to the large bed with his hand. Then he crossed his arms and waited.

Luxiana stared at them one by one with a confused look. "Okay? So... get out."

"No fucking way," Azriel replied, pulling out one of the room's one-seater armchairs, one of those set around a small tea table, before sitting down in it, staring at his soulmate.

"What do you mean ‘no’??" Luxiana said offendedly, opening her eyes wide.

Cassian straightened up from the wall he was leaning against, laughing softly. He approached Luxiana. "There's no way we're leaving you alone for a second now. Not after the scare you just gave us."

Luxiana opened her mouth wide at this, then huffed as she looked up at the ceiling. In any case, that wasn't going to stop her from finding a way to send Feyre a message. Besides, it might help her find out what spell they'd cast to track her. She let out a sort of growl of frustration as she turned back to the bed and threw herself into it. She landed flat on her stomach on the gray silk sheets, bouncing on the soft mattress. "I'll take the left side of the bed, you three must share the right."

Thanks to their soulmate's position on the bed, revealing the back of her pale legs, whose dress fabric didn't even cover her to mid-thigh, the three Illyrians finally noticed that she'd shortened her petticoats for the descent. A host of obscene thoughts passed through their minds before Cassian and Rhysand finally assimilated their soul mate's last words. She'd told them to share the right side. So she'd allowed them to sleep with her. Except that the three of them wouldn't fit in that little bed. Whoever got in first would then get to sleep alongside their soulmate. Cassian and Rhysand rushed to the side of the bed, elbowing each other and even knocking each other down.

After a fierce struggle, it was Cassian who landed on the bed violently, provoking a grunt of displeasure from Luxiana at his side. The Illyrian with the red siphons smiled with pride as he saw Rhysand on the ground at his feet, where Cassian had left him, killing him with his eyes.

Azriel walked around the bed, judging them, detailing them with contempt and shaking his head from left to right. He opened the closet door, grabbed the first long, covering nightgown with collar and sleeves to the wrists he could find. He didn't want his soulmate to be cold. He also grabbed a wool blanket. He walked over to Luxiana and handed her the garment. "At least get changed before..." He stopped speaking, frowning, leaning forward toward his soulmate. Did she have her eyes closed? He directed his fingers towards her face, pushing back the strands of hair that hung over her cheeks, eyelids and nose. He tucked them behind her ear without Luxiana stopping him, confirming that her eyes were closed. He listened attentively. Her heart was calm, her breathing regular. She was already asleep. He felt he was hallucinating. He understood that she must be really exhausted to fall asleep so quickly, but still... To fall asleep next to three Illyrians with a barbaric and cruel reputation without any difficulty... He ran a hand over his face. His soul mate really had no concept of danger. Any other ill-intentioned man could have taken advantage of this moment to do her bad things. Damn it, he'd have to explain to her how the world worked.

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