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imagine-that-100 · 4 years ago

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Why No Answer? | Part 2 |

Description of Part 1: Alex Turner x Reader (Female) | You’re woken up in the middle of the night to find Alex drunk and high on your doorstep. Looking after him proves to be a tiring and revealing ordeal.

Word Count: 12.8k

Warnings: Angst (from the past) but lots of fluff.

A/N: So this was requested by the lovely @psychkunox, really hope you enjoy this. I don’t know what happened, but I got very carried away with the word count yet again sorry about that ahha. I would recommend watching the Restaurant scene from When Harry Met Sally either before or after you read. It’s quite comical and will give you more context. Anyway though, Likes, Reblogs, and Feedback is always appreciated, but thank you all for reading, I really hope you all enjoy xx

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Read Part 1: | Here |

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“Al stop.” You scorn him in a whisper as he once again kisses the back of your neck as you stand in the queue for Space Mountain.

You really tried not to indulge in the feeling of his lips on your skin because it was an extremely addicting sensation. But you were in public, in Disney World of all places where everyone had their phones and cameras out, and the band were all standing in front of you in the queue.

“Alex.” You whisper shout again and pull yourself out of the hold he had on your hips when you felt him do it again.

You turn around and shake your head when you note the mischief in his eyes and the slight smirk gracing his pretty lips. You wanted nothing more to have them on your own in such a beautiful place but that couldn’t happen since you both decided you wanted to keep your relationship between yourselves for a while longer.

You were their photographer which meant that you didn’t want things to get weird with them on tour. And after you and Alex both decided to keep your relationship on the downlow when you initially started going out with each other, you sort of wanted to keep it that way, so nothing changed the dynamic of your group.

You were only 2 years younger than Matt and Alex, 3 years younger than Jamie and Nick, so you’d always been pretty close with them all. You thought of them all as your brothers as you were growing up as Alex had gone to the same primary school as you and Matt and they had been best mates since the beginning.

They met Jamie and Nick in High School along with Andy who was obviously initially in the band, before he stepped down and Nick took over. They had always been your family who’d taken good care of you and you knew just how lucky you were to have them all.

But obviously to them you’d always been Matt’s little, and sometimes annoying, sister. When they were 14/15 they all wanted nothing to do with you and you were certain Alex had hated you once upon a time, but that might have been because you were a 12 year old who’d started growing up having crushes on all of your brothers friends.

Thankfully they didn’t disown you completely as when you reached the less annoying age of 15, they didn’t seem to push you out as much. You liked hanging out with all of them, and you saw them more because they always had to come to your house because Matt couldn’t move the drum kit unless it was for a gig.

You’d always liked music as it had always been an escape for you. Like when the band were first starting out when you’d go up to your bedroom to escape the utter shit music they were making, and you’d have your Pulp and Blur records on.

There was a new band you actually introduced them too at the time which was The Strokes, which is comical in hindsight because if you’d never told Alex and Matt to listen to that record when they caught you humming along to Barely Legal, you weren’t sure Alex would have had the motivation to keep the band going and get it as big as they had become.

It wasn’t a secret that Alex’s hero was Julian Casablancas.

A few years later the band was getting bigger and the excitement in your household at them potentially making it big was intense. So much so that your Mum and Dad threw a party for them all when they got scouted and got the record deal.

It was at that party that Matt and Alex drunkenly agreed to let you be their photographer as soon as you were done with your photography apprenticeship. It was something they never forgot though and they did actually let you become their photographer.

So as soon as your apprenticeship finished in the summer of 2006, your 18-year-old self joined the lads on their tour. To say it was a dream come true would be an understatement.

Both you and Matt had loved photography your entire lives, stemming from when your Grandma bought you both a digital camera each one year for Christmas. Since then, it’d become your passion and your plan was to be a photographer anyway.

But being the photographer for Arctic Monkeys meant that you got to travel the world and see places you never thought you would, and you never got home sick because you already had your family around you.

You honestly adored your job.

In the breaks between their tours and them writing new material you would take other photography jobs in the years off, but that didn’t really happen for the first four years of them all being big.

Alex asked Domino if you could do their The Age of the Understatement tour too which you were surprised by, but of course you did it. A job was a job and you weren’t going to turn it down just because your brother wasn’t there.

Usually on the tours you’d stay in a separate bus from the lads because after the first week into the first tour you joined them on you saw what an absolute shit tip they all created. They were all revolting and all typical lads, being messy, every other sentence was a sex joke, and they were just revolting creatures.

To you it was genuinely a surprise they actually showered after every gig.

But thankfully with the years passing and being on tour busses became a constant for them instead of something new and exciting, they all got better. So, their Suck It And See tour was the first full tour you’d actually stayed in the bus with them.

Although sometimes you wished you hadn’t because that tour was where he met Breana and you definitely heard things you’d never want to hear again. You don’t know how the other lads weren’t scarred from the noises that came out of Matt’s bunk those nights.

All you had to say about it was thank god for earphones and ear defenders.

But you think it was on that tour that you started getting closer to Alex and the other lads. Mostly due to Matt being a love stuck puppy who spent most of his time with Breana but also because you didn’t want to burden him with your emotions.

About a month before the Suck It And See tour started in the February of 2011, your arsehole of a boyfriend texted you saying that he didn’t want to see you anymore. He was an arsehole for doing it over text and then not answering your calls afterwards, but he was an even bigger arsehole for getting with who you thought was your best friend as soon as the tour started.

Matt and the lads obviously knew about the breakup but due to them all having no social media none of them knew what your best friend had done to you. So, you cried about that betrayal in your bunk at night when you knew everyone else was asleep and you cried when you found moments of solitude.

They had enough going on with interviews and tours and you didn’t want them to burden them with your issues too. But that stopped when Alex walked in on your crying in the back lounge of the bus about a month into the tour.

Your ex best friend had just posted a picture of her and your ex who you still had the misfortune of having feelings for and you just crumbled. When you saw it you just couldn’t bear the thought of being around anyone else, so you slipped out of their presence and cried your way back to the tour bus.

Thankfully no one followed you in your time of crisis which meant that you got your uncontrollable sobs out of the way alone. But of course, someone came back to the bus and found you.

And that person was Alex.

He’d come back for another pack of fags needing the extra nicotine in the hours before a show. But all thoughts of that stopped when he heard crying come from the back end of the bus.

He walked past the bunks and opened the door into the back lounge to find you sat on the floor with your head buried into your knees and sobs were ringing in his ears. His heart dropped at the sight.

“Y/N what's wrong?” Alex asks, rushing over to you.

And when you didn't answer he called your name again. “Y/N?”

But you just shake your head and continue sobbing into your knees. So he begs, “Please talk to me, love”

He was kneeling down beside you, his hand coming to the back of your head as if to slowly coax you out of your hiding stop. And after stroking the back of your head for a minute, your head rises from your hiding spot but your eyes remain shut and you continue to sob.

Alex tries his best to coax you out of your sobs but you’re pretty much hyperventilating in front of him. After another one of the longest minutes of Alex’s life he manages to get you to slow your cries enough for words to fall from your lips.

“My life’s falling apart” You sob, still refusing to look at him. Your breathing is better but still erratic when you continue to tell him in a pain stricken voice, “I can’t carry on crying myself to sleep like this every night... I- I just want to feel normal again”

“What’s happened? Why are you upset?” Alex begs for you to tell him, ripping the tears from under your eyes.

The only thing that comes to mind is your previous relationship, so Alex asks, “Is it about your ex?”

You nod, tears still pouring down your eyes, “He’s taken everything Alex... My life is fucking ruined”

“No he hasn’t Y/N. You’re here, you’ve got us” He tries to assure you, but you just shake your head.

After a second you open your watery eyes and Alex can see how much pain they hold. They somehow contain even more when you speak the words out loud, “He’s going out with Y/B/F.”

Even Alex’s blood runs cold when he hears that. His words almost get caught in his throat when he asks, “What?”

You nod, sniffling a bit and wiping your own tears from your cheeks when you repeat, “He’s going out with Y/B/F.”

“Please tell me you’re joking” The words fall from his mouth before he can stop them.

You and your best friend had been together since day one, like you’d practically been friends since birth. You were practically sisters.

It was only the odd time Alex would come to yours and Matt’s house growing up and Y/B/F wasn’t there with you. You were the annoying girls he couldn’t escape.

Not that he still felt like that as you yourself had become a really good friend but back when you were 12 you were both so fucking annoying. But everyone knew that your and Y/B/F came as a pair.

You were the best of friends, and completely inseparable.

“I don’t think I’d be on the floor crying if I was joking Alex.” You whine, trying your best to stop your tears now someone else was with you.

You nod towards your phone that you threw on the sofa when you walked in the room and say, “Just look”

So Alex does. He takes your phone off the side and unlocks it knowing your password was your birthday and he quickly puts the numbers in and watches as it unlocks.

And his heart sinks at the proof that lays in his hands. There on the screen he can clearly see the picture of your best friend and your ex-boyfriend quite clearly together.

They were posed in the way couples typically posed for pictures and then there was another of them at the same party and they stood kissing, and Alex found it repulsive.

“This isn’t okay.” Alex looks up from the phone to see your head no leaning back against the settee, tears falling freely down your cheeks now.

You make no effort to look at him when you say, “I know.”

“Why didn’t Matt tell me?” Alex asks, a little confused.

Surely this was something that was to be at least hushedly whispered to the people closest to you.

“Because he doesn't know.” You say simply.

“Why?” He asks, locking the phone so you didn’t see the pictures again.

You told Matt everything these days. There was no point in secrets between you as you were adults and you cared for the other’s well-being.

You’d always been open with each other, minus the time that you went out to a party when you were 16 and came back with a series of love bites on your neck. All of the lads had been really shocked when you walked in a little bit tipsy with those on your skin.

Matt had been furious and a little disgusted knowing someone had been touching you in a romantic sense. So, it was no surprise to the other lads that when you were questioned on if something more happened, you pressed your swollen lips together and slipped up to your room denying that anything else had happened.

It was comical because it was clear to everyone else that it had gone further than someone kissing your neck.

Everyone took the piss out of Matt that night saying that someone had just taken his sister's virginity and it left the drummer mortified. But you always denied it to the full band until about 6 months later when Alex had asked you in the kitchen if you were actually lying or not.

Of course, Alex didn’t actually tell any of the others when you confirmed what everyone already knew. But that was the last time you’d ever lied to your brother.

So, hearing that your brother didn’t know about this shocking and frankly disgusting news in your life was concerning.

You looked up towards your brothers’ best mate and told him the truth, “Because I can’t ruin his time with Breana…”

You had to trail off because the lump in your throat was getting too much. So you swallowed it away before continuing, your voice still pained, barely above a whisper, “He really likes her and he doesn’t need to be worrying about me... She could be the mother of his children for all we know... I’m not ruining that chance because my life has fallen apart.”

“He’d understand Y/N/N.” Alex told you, once again leaning forward to wipe away your tears.

You shake your head, “It’s not fair.”

“And you think what’s happened to you is fair?” Alex questions, knowing full well that it wasn’t.

No one deserved this type of betrayal. Especially you.

You just started weeping again then and Alex brought you into his arms, needing to console you in a hug. Thankfully you didn’t resist his hug and Alex let you cry into his shoulder as you clung to him.

After a while of him rubbing your back and whispering you sweet nothings, he had to tell you, “You could have told me Y/N/N.”

You shake your head into his neck then, Alex could still feel the tears falling onto his skin. He just about hears you say into his shoulder, “You’re happy with Arielle, I don’t want you dealing with my shit either.”

“Your family, what hurts you hurts me” Alex tells you, “You’ve always got me Y/N… Always.”

After another five minutes of you both on the floor, Arielle walks in and is immediately worried seeing you sat on the ground crying into Alex’s arms. Alex just politely asked her to go and get Matt though which she did, and you didn’t oppose it.

You couldn’t deal with that on your own any longer and you were thankful for Alex being so kind to you. Your heart just fully melted in your chest later on after everything had been explained to everyone and he pulled you aside and gave you another big hug.

He whispered to you, “You’re going to be okay Y/N/N.” before placing a kiss to the top of your head.

The rest of that tour was filled with him making sure you were always okay and so did the other lads. But maybe it felt more personal to you when Alex checked on you because he was the one that found you.

It was him that just told you to cut them from your life completely and block them on everything as ‘they weren’t good enough for you anyway’. After you did that you felt better about your life. You’d cleared them from your Instagram, leaving no trace on your page that they were ever in your life and it was a difficult purge, but it definitely helped you in the long run.

The years without them in your life were tough but it had proven to be for the best in the end.

Because once upon a time you thought you were going to marry your ex-boyfriend, but now you were standing in Disney World with your boyfriend trying to steal kisses from you. And you wouldn’t change it for the world.

You give your boyfriend of 4 months a warning look, but his eyes just held mischief. You had to remind him, “They are going to see.”

“Then let’s go somewhere else.” Alex says moving back towards you, and ushering you to move up the line a bit.

“After this we’ll try and escape.” You promise, but he was really shit at turning you down and you wanted it to be believable. “But you have to actually pretend you don’t wanna go.”

He rolls his eyes but sighs, “Fine.”

After Space Mountain you announced to the lads that you wanted to go see the Disney characters next which they all groaned at. You first of all pleaded with Matt to come with you knowing he wouldn’t before the rest of the lads and one by one they all dismissed you.

The last person you asked was Alex and he surprisingly put up a good fight until you ‘wore him down’ and got your own way. You spent the rest of the afternoon going round with him and getting pictures of the both of you with the characters and you got a nice lady to take a few pictures of you both outside the castle.

Those were your favourites, especially the one where he was kissing you.

As you were walking back to meet the others who were already back at the bus, you felt the need to tell him something which you’d yet to say. You didn’t think you’d find a better time than walking hand in hand in front of the Disney castle after one of the best days of your life.

So you pause your walk back for a moment to kiss him one last time before you make it back to the others. The kiss was sweet, just like the whole day had been, and you definitely felt like it was the right time to say, “I love you Alex.”

Immediately a smile found its way onto his lips, and he was practically beaming with joy. “You love me?” Alex asks you in a little disbelief.

“Yeah…” You nod, a massive smile on your lips “A lot as well.”

Alex leant down and kissed you again then, this time though his arms wrapped around your waist and lifted you off your feet, spinning you around in his arms. It caused you to giggle into the kiss a little but you loved it.

When your feet touched the ground again Alex told you, “I love you so much Y/N”

“I know.” You grin as he’d already told you once before.

Alex just chuckles at you, “Alright Han Solo” which made you giggle.

“I love you more than anything Al, thank you for making me happy.” You tell him wrapping your arms around him, needing a tight embrace just so he knew you meant every single word.

His arms obviously snake around you, making you feel secure in the warm hug. And your heart melts once more when he kisses your head and says, “I love you more Angel, thank you for letting me make you happy.”

~*~*~*~

“Al.” You said attempting and failing to pull away from the kiss he’d trapped you in.

If you were honest, you really weren’t really putting up much of a fight to stop the kisses. You were in one of their many tents that this festival they were performing at had given them.

There was one for chilling out in, one that was essentially a bar, and a few more you’d yet to explore. But Alex had pulled you into one with the mass of beanbags in it and he wasted no alone time to have his lips connect to yours.

“Yes baby?” He says in his low voice and you could hear his hunger for you in his voice before he kissed you again.

It made your stomach flip as you knew exactly what he was thinking as you’d heard his voice like that many times since you started seeing each other. You both had to show some restraint though as anyone could walk into the tent, there was only a flimsy curtain between inside and outside.

You pull on his hair to make him pull away as you couldn’t do it yourself as he’d trapped you between him and a beanbag. Once his soft lips parted from yours, you told him seriously, “Wait until the hotel.”

“But I want you now.” Alex then pouts at you, confirming the explicit thoughts that were running through his head.

You tell him truthfully, finding his pout very cute, “And I want you, but I’m not shagging you in a tent.”

“Why?” Alex questions, looking around for a moment before his gorgeous brown eyes meet your Y/E/C ones again. He chuckles, “It's a really posh tent.”

You guess it was too post to actually call it a tent. It was huge for a start and looked very expensive. You definitely felt privileged to get to experience all of this with him and the band.

“Hun you had me all last night...” You shake your head whilst smiling like an idiot, “You can retrain yourself until we get back.”

“Not easily.” He pouts again and it makes you giggle which he once again finds adorable.

Another kiss is exchanged then but you don't let it get to what it just had been like. You stop it after he tries to distract you and deepen it again but you’re having none of it.

“You need to go or there gunna be like ‘what’s he doing in there?’” You say knowing he’d be asked to drink with them sooner rather than later.

Alex smiles knowing you’re right, but he chuckles when he tells you, “You know we have to tell them at some point, right?”

“Yeah I know, I just want as much of this tour to be as normal as possible.” You say, aimlessly stroking your fingers up and down the short hair on the back of his hair. You grin when you say, “I’d like to escape Jamie’s jokes for as long as possible.”

Alex just laughs then before he pecks your lips once more. “I don’t blame you Angel… But you can handle yourself. We’ll be fine.”

“I know.” You smile, feeling very content in this moment that you had with him. “I love you Al.”

“I love you too.” He tells you before he steals another kiss and gets himself up. “Do you want a drink?”

You shake your head whilst you get yourself comfy on the beanbag, also reaching to the nearby blanket to cover yourself with. “Nah, I’m good thanks. I’m gunna have a nap before the show.”

Alex smiles at you then, turning back towards you when he gets near the curtain to leave. He just stops by the curtain that divides him from outside and when he sees you getting curled up under the blanket.

He can’t help but nod and say, “Yeah.”

“Yeah what?” You ask looking back up to him standing there grinning at you.

Alex nods down at you in your cosy spot and continues, “Yeah, you were definitely meant for me.”

You grin like an idiot then before you tell him, “Love you baby.”

“Love you too.” Alex smiles and sends a wink your way before he heads out of the tent.

You can’t help but shut your eyes and snuggle into your new ‘bed’ with a massive grin on your face. But when you hear Miles say, “Oi Al, you dickhead. Come and have a shot.” you just start giggling.

~*~*~*~

You were absolutely plastered, and it was really making Alex laugh. Even more so than it usually would because you were trying your best not to be obvious that you wanted his affection.

You were a clingy drunk which was absolutely fine, and all the lads knew that, but watching you slip up around him and having to make up for it with the other lads was really comical for Alex.

You’d just come over to Alex after you’d beaten him at pool and teased him for being shit. To which Alex was shooting digs back at you but all you did in response was laugh, call him a sore loser and ruffle his perfect hair up which you knew annoyed him.

So Alex had just forced your hands out of his hair by grabbing your wrists and stopping you from doing anything more. He gave you warning looks like he would have done any other time you annoyed him before you got together but you also noted the looks as a reminder of the secret that you’d set out.

That was what led you to sitting on Jamie’s lap and talking his ear off about Katie whilst playing with his wavy hair. He threatened you to get off it, saying he’d cut it all off which you at first drunkenly pleaded with him not too but then you changed your mind saying he could definitely pull off a Peaky Blinders cut.

Once off Jamie you went on to have some flirty banter with Miles as Nick and Jamie played pool. Alex was watching you with an amused look on his face as his best mate was teasing you about not being on the pull whilst being in a bar with everyone.

You came back with things like, “Aw Miles, I couldn’t do that to you. I know you’d cry yourself to sleep if I entertained anyone elses flirting besides yours.”

Alex also found your laugh adorable when Miles kissed you on your cheek and Matt told him to leave you alone and to stop flirting with you. It was times like that that made Alex glad his best mate didn’t know about the two of you yet.

But after Nick’s game of pool finished and Nick won, he was calling it a night, despite it being relatively early. It seemed that you knew your tolerance though and decided to head back to the bus with Nick.

So you then went around the other 4 lads who were staying and made a bit of an effort to kiss them all goodnight, Alex presumed so you could kiss him. Something which proved to be correct because you came to him last after kissing all the other lads, including your brother, on the cheek and came to give him one.

“Thank you for my drinks” You drunkenly smile at him and Alex grins down at you in an amused way.

“You’re welcome love” Alex chuckles at your tipsy state and you then force a hug upon him.

He obviously hugs you back but he’s aware of his mates looking so he doesn’t make it completely obvious that he’s enjoying the hug as much as he is despite him really wanting to. He wanted nothing more than to kiss your lips instead of you leaning in to kiss his cheek.

When you left his arms, he smiled at you and you moved back to your brother and made him give you a hug. Something which Matt did but not without a roll of his eyes, but Alex could tell it was a playful one.

“See you in the morning guys.” You say with a smile after linking your arm through Nick’s so he could help you walk back.

Everyone said bye to you then and their attention was on the new game of pool again. But whilst it was Matt’s go Alex let his eyes focus on you.

You were so cute, he wanted nothing more than to take you back to a hotel away from the others so he could just be with you all night. But Alex also understood why you wanted to keep it a secret for a while longer.

Tours were long, and he knew you’d both be bullied about it for a while from the others, which you were both prepared for. But you were due to be on the road for the next year with AM due out in September.

The plan was to tell them as soon as interviews back home started so you didn’t have to be around the joking for long. Alex was used to it after Alexa and Arielle, but he knew you weren’t, and he respected that.

So that was why he denied it when the lads began to question him on it about 5 minutes after you left.

“What’s going on?” Matt asks as Alex pots another ball into the pool table.

Alex grins thinking Matt was just fuming he was losing. As Alex moves around the table to eye up another winning shot, he says, “I’m beating you at pool

“No.” Matt shakes his head, earning eye contact from his best mate. “I mean with Y/N/N.”

“What do you mean?” Alex asks as he leans over the table to play his next shot, “She’s just gone back with Nick.”

“Don’t think he means that.” Miles grinned at him after he missed the tricky shot he’d chosen.

Alex raises his eyebrows in a questioning way, getting the feeling that people were catching on to how you were around each other.

And that suspicion is confirmed when Jamie says, “You’re very touchy with each other.”

“Touchy?” Alex laughs, as he watches your brother take another shot, “Jamie mate, she was on your lap earlier.”

“Yeah, but she keeps like teasing you and messing with your hair and shit.” Matt chips in with his observations after missing his shot on the stripped balls.

Alex rolls his eyes, “Matt, you literally fucked with my hair earlier today and Jamie did it yesterday... You all like to fucking annoy me by doing that.”

Alex continues to defend the both of you even though he wishes he didn’t have to. “You know what she’s like when she’s drunk, she doesn’t leave anyone alone.”

“He has a point; she didn’t shy away from me kissing her.” Miles points out raising his pint to the drummer.

Matt fakes a gag then and says, “Leave her the fuck alone Kane.”

“But she loves me.” Miles pouts, resting a hand over his heart like Matt’s words had hurt him. “You definitely want me as your brother-in-law.”

Alex smiles to himself knowing that he was now 6 months ahead of Miles in that category. God, he loved you. He could definitely see a bright future with you, and he had every intention to marry you one day in the years to come.

“I’d rather go to a Radiohead gig.” Matt says which earns a laugh from everyone, knowing how the hatred between the bands still hadn’t died out.

~*~*~*~

A month later you thought you were doing well. You were very careful around everyone after Alex told you about the questioning he got after the bar.

You were just normal with each other throughout the days, not overly interacting with each other. But when Alex’s eyes were hidden by his sunglasses, he couldn’t help but let his eyes wonder.

And it definitely helped that it was your job to take pictures of him. You could stare at him all day that way, even if it was through a camera lens.

Moments alone came when you’d stay in the bus when they went on nights out and Alex would venture back early meaning on nights like that, he actually got to give you goodnight kisses like he loved doing. Other moments took place when he would wander off at the multitude of festivals they were doing.

You’d say you were going getting pictures of different acts that no one else wanted to go watch. Alex would say he was going for a walk about 20 minutes later. Purely coincidence that you met up with him on his walk after you’d taken a photo or two.

Other times you snuck into each other's hotel rooms about an hour after you’d all gone your separate ways. But it was your nights in the hotels that you loved the most.

You got your privacy, and it was secure. The same as it was when he came to your house before the tour or when you went to his.

You loved being alone with him.

And tonight, all the other lads had gone out to a party somewhere and Alex had been faking an illness all day so he could stay in and they wouldn’t ask questions. They wouldn’t think it was weird you not going because you rarely went out with them.

They knew you valued your sleep too much.

So that was why you were alone in the back lounge with Alex tonight. And you’d honestly had one of the best nights being your normal cuddly selves.

You’d just watched a film with each other whilst being cuddled up on the sofa and you very nearly fell asleep in his embrace, but you weren’t wasting a full night alone with him. After the film you both went out and got yourselves a takeout from a place just down the road.

You made it into a full date night which was fucking adorable. After food, you coexisted normally for a little while, Alex letting you lean back against him whilst you edited your photos on your night off.

You were a pro at it after so many years, so it took no longer than an hour for the ones promotion wanted of them all. Alex was quite happily watching you edit the pictures of him and his friends as he absentmindedly played with your hair, placed random little kisses on your neck or on the back of your head, and at one point he even sang.

It was a really beautiful song, one that you’d only heard once before when he let you listen to the album when it was finished.

You only knew the title because he said it often in the song but having your boyfriend softly sing Mad Sounds into your ear as you worked you wished you could freeze time and appreciate it. His voice was amazing as everyone knew, but hearing it so close and so soft, it was hard to keep shivers from running down your spine.

“Such a beautiful song Al.” You smile closing your laptop as you’d finished what you needed to do and he’d finished singing.

You turn to him a bit more and he smiles back at you, tucking a stray strand of your hair behind your ear. “Like you then.” Alex grins before pressing his lips to yours.

You smile into the kiss as the comment was very adorable of him, but when you pulled back bullying was in order, “You’re so cheesy.”

“You love it.” Alex grins as you get up and put your laptop away, but you grab your small Lumix camera and come to sit back down.

You grin as you come and sit back down, this time straddling his lap so you could get a few close ups of him looking cute. You bring the viewfinder up to your eye and once you see his adorable smile on the other side of the lens you capture the perfection.

“I do.” You grin back at him.

You like that Alex never shies away from you when you have a camera in your hand. You knew after this much time that he trusted you with what you were capturing, especially in these moments together they wouldn’t be seen by anyone else.

“However…” You say, putting the camera down for a moment, “Me and your music are nothing alike.”

Alex frowns at you a little then, his hands running up your thighs, pulling you a little closer, “I think a certain track and our text message history would claim otherwise.”

You roll your eyes then knowing he was talking about Why’d You Only Call Me When You’re High? But when he grins at your eye roll you quickly snap another picture of him.

“I guess I shouldn't have got involved with a lyricist if I didn't want songs about me, should I?” You ask with a knowing smirk as you pull the camera away from your face.

You don’t bother checking it on the screen as it pops up, you already knew it would be a good picture. Not because you took it, but because it was of him and he was happy.

“No, probably not.” Alex chuckles as he takes the camera from you before raising it to take one of you.

You give him a pointed look after the photograph and joke, “You better hope you get to release your B-sides before Matt catches on.”

“I’ll be murdered, I have no doubt.” Alex grins and you burst out laughing at him being dramatic.

Alex thinks you look gorgeous though, so he raises your camera back up and you let him, not having a problem with him taking your picture. You smile at first but after he gets the first picture, he keeps looking through the viewfinder so you then puff your cheeks out jokingly and move closer to the camera.

Alex chuckles from behind it and he moves the camera from his face so you can both giggle together. He steals a kiss from you which you gladly accept, and you can't help but bite your lip afterwards.

He just looked so good. His skin was flawless these days and the fact that all of his fair wasn’t around his face anymore made his stunning jawline stand out. His brown eyes that were usually always hidden by sunglasses were shining brightly and the smile on his lips really showed how happy he was.

And seeing him happy made you happy. You could safely say you truly loved him. You’d do anything to keep you both as happy as you are now.

Whilst you’re deep in thought, Alex raises your camera back up to his eye which breaks your daydreaming about his features and you playfully roll your eyes.

“Smile for me Angel.” He asks and you do for one shot because he is pretty cute and pretty impossible not to smile at.

“Beautiful.” Alex confirms when he quickly looks down at the screen seeing the picture, he just caught of you.

“Like you then.” You use his own words against him with a playful smile.

Alex then puts your camera down to the side and with his newly free hand he cups the back of your neck and mumbles a ‘very good’ before bringing you in for a kiss. Playful and sweet were the only ways to describe it.

You just adored this alone time with him, sitting on his lap at the back bus, which was usually a very crowded area for you all to use, and you were kissing each other like it was just yesterday you got together. Everything still felt just as exciting and new and you never wanted his lips off yours.

You loved that it was you who got to run your fingers through his hair and pull on it when you wanted a kiss to carry on longer, like you just did. You loved the way his large hands held your hips, keeping you close to him.

But mostly you loved that he was always wanting affection. You’d not been in a relationship for a very long time so it made you nervous initially but there was something about Alex that you craved, and his affection was definitely one of those things that you were addicted to now.

You never wanted moments like these to end. But of course, that wouldn’t be realistic.

“I fucking knew it!”

You both pull away from each other to see Jamie with his jaw agape by the door. And your heart dropped to the ground.

“Jamie.” Alex says before Jamie can run out of the room.

“Oh I can’t fucking believe it.” He says, still stood there with his jacket in his hand but he looks like his whole world has ended. “I’ve gotta go get Matt.”

The panic in you rises then and you practically just off Alex’s lap and grab your intruders’ arm before he can turn back, “Jamie no, don’t.” You plead, pulling on his arm to come into the room.

He turns back towards you then and he lets himself be pulled into the room. His head is still baffled though which leads him to say rather loudly, “You’re shagging, aren’t you?”

Your eyes go wide at the volume of his voice and you scorn, “Jamie.” quietly as you pull him further into the room so you can shut the door once more.

His eyes go wide impossibly wider though and he gasps, “You are!” looking from you to Alex who was still sat down.

“Matt is going to fucking murder you.” Jamie chuckles looking Alex dead in the eye as you ensure that no one else is on the bus by looking down through the bunks (thankfully all the curtains were still open) to the front lounge and you saw no one down the other end.

“Jamie please don’t start.” You hear Alex say, evidently not wanting this to get out of hand.

You close the door and turn around to the still very shocked man and say, “I’ll explain just please shut up and sit down.”

So you did explain that you’d been seeing each other for months. Jamie was shocked because he only started to suspect something a month into the tour.

But after he’d let the information sink in, it wasn’t really so shocking anymore. Which is why you’d got onto the conversation of why it was still a secret after you’d been going out for months.

“You know he’d be fine.” Jamie tells you, sitting down opposite you both, trying to persuade you to tell Matt. “He wouldn’t actually kick off, you can both do what you like.”

“It’s not really just about Matt.” You tell him honestly from your point of view. “It’s about all of you making jokes and shit for months. I didn’t want that.”

“Y/N we wouldn’t do that.” Jamie says leaning towards the both of you from the other sofa, but you’re having none of it.

“Cookie you’re the worst one for it.” You say with a pointed look.

You then point to Alex, who you were sitting beside now and say, “I remember what you were like with him and Arielle.”

And it was a lot. They joked about it all the time to start with, and it was annoying for you, let alone Alex and her.

“Him and Arielle were different.” Jamie states, a little on the defensive side, but then he follows it up with, “You don’t make funny videos for a living, I actually respect you a hell of a lot for putting up with us.”

You shake your head and tell the tipsy, but now definitely more sober man, “You’re not that bad.”

“Oh, we are.” Jamie says and you laugh because you were just being polite.

They could be a handful sometimes if you were telling the truth. But you wouldn’t change anything about any of them. You loved them all because of who and how they were, and they were all your family.

Jamie follows up with, “I'm genuinely surprised you actually want to go out with him after knowing what he’s like.”

You giggle at that and just pout as you joke, “I know, but you’re taken Cookie, so I went for the next best thing.”

“Hey” Alex scoffs, looking towards you, pretending to be offended.

You and Jamie just laugh at him though, and you intertwine your fingers when you grab Alex’s hand to hold as a little apology. You’d be sure to actually swear to him that you were joking later though.

Jamie notes the gesture and he can see the little knowing smiles on your faces and his heart melts a bit for the both of you. You were both pretty cute with each other to be fair and the more that Jamie had been playing detective about it he thought that the two of you would be a pretty good match.

So he was genuinely happy for the both of you.

“And as for the jokes…” Jamie continues, causing the two of you to look back around at him. But Jamie looks at you as he says, “If it upset you, you know I wouldn't do it”

“I don’t mind the odd joke about me sucking his dick or whatever, but I’ll go crazy if that's all I hear about for the next year.” You tell him honestly.

You could handle jokes, it wasn’t anything new. They joked about your first boyfriend to Matt for the longest time and had done each time you got a new one.

You could take a joke. But not 24/7 like this tour would promise it would.

“Okay, never say that again.” Jamie pleads, the shocked look not coming off his face, but you and Alex just laugh at his reaction.

His head goes into his hands for a moment but afterwards he looks at you both and says, “Yeah, you don’t have anything to worry about, joke wise, until I get comfortable with this dynamic because that was strange coming from your mouth.”

“You’ve heard me say worse than that, surely?” You ask, very amused by his discomfort.

Jamie just blankly says, “Not about Alex… And you’re practically my sister.”

“Sorry Cookie. I’ve got a right to say rude jokes about my boyfriend when I want to. He can say ones about me but from your reaction I don’t think you want him to.”

He then looks Alex dead in the eye and begs, “Please don’t.”

You both just end up laughing.

~*~*~*~

You decided after that night that you would think about being more open to telling Matt about everything that was going on. Thankfully Jamie was quite respectful of the whole thing and actually kept your secret.

He didn’t make things awkward for you both either, if anything he helped you both out a lot. Sometimes when you were out with them Jamie would keep the others entertained so you could escape with Alex for a little bit on a ‘fag break’ which would consist of stolen kisses.

Other times when you were all out, Jamie would lowkey guilt trip Alex into going back with you early so no one asked questions which you loved him even more for.

During this month that Jamie knew though, you’d been trying to come up with a way to tell Matt. Because you weren’t stupid, you knew this couldn’t go on for much longer.

Each time you tried to tell him though something would happen which meant that you didn’t. Once you froze, unable to tell him because you just genuinely didn’t know how to.

It wasn’t exactly something that you could drop on him and expect him to be fine with. Your nerves probably didn’t help but other times when you worked up the courage to do it, other things would go wrong.

Matt was in a foul mood one of the times, so that was a no go. Miles and Nick came in and interrupted another time before you got the words out and it was like a never ending series of unfortunate events that stopped you.

Alex had politely offered to do it after a few failed attempts but you said that you’d be more comfortable doing it. Partly because you thought that you should be the one to tell your brother and partly because you knew Matt wouldn’t hit you.

But there had been multiple failed attempts since then so you thought that you may actually make it to the end of the summer festivals at this rate.

It was nearing the end of August now and you were all staying in a hotel again tonight as you’d got to the city they were performing in the day before the show. You were pleased because it meant another night in with Alex so after you’d all had your dinner downstairs you’d given him your spare key card for your room so he could come to you whenever he liked.

Alex told you that he was looking forward to using it and he was excited to spend another night with you. It warmed your heart hearing that and when he rang you at 9:30 saying he was just running to the shop to grab the both of you some snacks, he said he’d let himself in about 20 minutes when he got back.

And that is why you were a little surprised when there was knocking on the door about 10 minutes later. You thought that was fast for a start but you gave him the key card so you wouldn’t have to get up and answer the door.

“Come in!” You shout across the room hoping he would hear you.

It seems that he does but his muffled response is, “It’s locked.” when the handle doesn’t budge.

You roll your eyes and mumble, “That’s why I gave you a key.” under your breath as you get up off your bed and head to the door.

And you’re about to scorn him but when the door opens you don’t find your boyfriend. You find your brother.

“Hey.” Matt says, stepping into your room after the door opens.

You’re shocked by his presence but try and act as calm as possible when you say, “Hey, you alright?”

Thank fuck you were still dressed. And thank fuck Alex wasn’t already here because you didn’t want him to find out like that.

But then you realised he’d be here in 10 minutes or so. And that made you want to get Matt out as quickly as possible.

“I’m fine, are you?” Your brother asks once he picks up the complimentary chocolate that the hotel had put on your bed which you were saving for later.

Any other night you would have ripped the shit out of him for coming in and doing that but now was not the time. You were borderline panicking as you were about to be caught out. But you try and disguise that as best as possible.

“Yeah, great thanks.” But really you’re just thinking, Shit.

Your brother asks you, “What do you have planned for tonight?”

Thinking on your feet all you can come up with is, “Just editing more pictures.”

“Fancy blowing it off and watching Netflix with me?” Matt questions and you all of a sudden feel really guilty that you want him to leave as much as you do.

You pull a little bit of a face at his question and try to carry on your lie, “Oh, I would but I’m honestly not feeling all that great after tea, so I was just gunna get an early night after I’ve done a few more pictures.”

“Funny that.” Your brother states when you turn away from him to grab your laptop from your bag as he sits himself down at the end of your bed.

You move towards the little desk that was in the room though and ask, “What is?”

“Alex isn’t feeling too well either.”

Well shit. You were too alike for your own good, coming up with the same excuses without telling the other.

“Oh?” You question, shitting it at this point, so you just open up your MacBook to distract you. “Maybe it was something we ate downstairs?”

All your brother replied was, “Doubt that because I had the same thing as you both.”

You choose no response as your best response and just continue to pull up a picture of Matt you hadn’t finished editing on photoshop yet. Being creative always eased your nerves so hopefully him watching you edit a picture of him would distract him.

“Y/N.” Matt says, trying to gain your attention.

You instead just carry-on messing with the photograph and suggest, “Maybe you should go check on our friend bro, could be being sick for all we know. Wouldn’t make for the prettiest show tomorrow”

“Y/N…” Matt says once more, and you know he wants you to look at him.

So you do and you see your brother sat on the end of your bed, looking at you. He asks in a serious yet calm tone, “Is Alex really ‘just a friend’ anymore?

Well. You guess you didn’t have to find a way to tell him anymore.

You sigh and shake your head, “No.” and as you close your laptop you tell the truth, “He’s a lot more.”

Matt can tell you’re serious straight away just by the way you were looking at him. And it makes him shake his head a bit in disbelief. He says calmly but in a tone that worries you, as he also runs a hand through his hair, “I knew it.”

“Please don’t be angry Matt.” You all but beg as you turn in your chair towards him more. “It’s my fault we didn't tell you sooner... I didn’t want things to be different with the group, so I was the one who wanted to keep it a secret.”

“You know you didn’t have to do that, right?” Matt has to ask you, feeling awful that you felt like you couldn’t tell him something. “I just want you to be happy... Al’s practically family so of course I want the same for him.”

“I know, I’m really sorry…” You trail off for a second, “It just got to a point where I didn’t know how to tell you and when I tried to things always got in the way.”

Matt nods completely understanding that. At least you wanted to tell him.

“When did it start?” Is the question Matt asks you next.

“New Year’s Day” You say quickly before wincing a little, hearing that it has been 8 months out loud.

You felt so bad.

Matt is shocked by that news too, “That long...? Really?”

“Yeah.” You nod, feeling awful, “I’m sorry.”

Matt ends up asking you a few more questions after that which were pretty much big brother sort of questions, making sure Alex was treating you right and stuff like that. Thankfully this had all gone very plain sailing and Matt was happy for you like you both knew he would be.

And he had forgiven you for not telling him for so long too which was a big relief. It felt like a massive weight off your shoulders.

So much so that you had to get up off your seat and give him a hug. Matt stood up for the embrace, so you got to hug him properly and it was such a lovely warm hug that you felt like you hadn’t had in such a long time.

Halfway through that long hug though, both you and Matt hear the door to your room unlock. You press your lips together and wince a little knowing exactly what is about to happen.

“Hey Y/N/N.” You hear Alex say from somewhere behind you and you let go of Matt and both of you look towards Alex now closing the door, not yet noticing the situation.

After he closes the door though, he begins to say before he turns towards you, “I got you thes- oh”

Matt smiles though seeing your favourite flowers in his best friend’s hand. You can’t help but smile at the sight of them too, and his face falling realising Matt was here was a little funny too.

He looked a little scared.

“I’m glad you’re treating her right Al.” Matt tells him, and Alex struggles with his words for a second and he looks to you for help.

“I just told him.” You nod confirming it out loud for him.

Alex’s eyes go from you back to his best mate then and he starts, “Listen Matt, I’m sor-”

But Matt interrupts, “No no I don’t need an apology.” He shakes his head, “Just don’t fuck it up.” He then looks between the both of you, “Either of you... Because that would make for a really awkward tour.”

You smile at that and say, “I don’t plan on doing, and I know he doesn’t either.”

Matt grins at you then and he looks back to Alex and takes a few steps towards him. He points a finger to his chest and says very seriously, “Make her cry Turner, and I'll castrate you.”

Alex slowly nods, “Noted”

Matt must then break into a grin because Alex does too, and your brother then heads over to the door.

Matt turns back towards you and says, “Have a nice night love birds.” and walks out with a grin and he shuts the door behind him.

Both you and Alex stay silent for a second looking at the door almost in disbelief that the thing you’d both waited 8 months to do, was now over. Alex turns around to look at you and you’re both just awkwardly smiling at each other.

Alex puts the plastic bag filled with snacks down on the table he was standing beside and says, “Well you could have pre warned me.”

You shake your head, “I didn’t know he was coming. But he asked me to watch Netflix with him and apparently I gave the same excuse as you.”

“Oh fuck. Clever, aren’t we?” Alex chuckles a little and you nod in response.

Alex holds up the flowers he got for you and you can’t help but smile, “Well, I was hoping to surprise you with these, but you definitely won on the surprise front tonight.”

You giggle at that and you lean up to kiss him after taking the flowers from him, “Thank you my love.”

You briefly put them down whilst you say, “At least we don’t have to stay away from each other anymore.”

“Never going to let you go now Darling.” Alex chuckles before picking you up in a hug and spinning you around. You can’t help but giggle.

The next morning you both ventured downstairs to have breakfast with the others and found that they were all there waiting for you at your table with knowing looks. You and Alex just had grins on your faces knowing Matt would have gone around and told them all before you even got the chance.

They were all of course happy for you but of course you got some jokes and some questions. Jamie had got a bit used to it now, so he was starting with his jokes in private to you but when you sat down, he asked the both of you, “Suck his dick last night?”

“Wow, you’ve been waiting for that one, haven’t you?” You laugh, sitting yourself down next to him, immediately reaching for the menu so you could see what was on offer for breakfast.

The table obviously all laughed, and it was all fun and playful as you imagined it would be. You were glad Matt wasn’t cringing at all the details that you were giving out, as it was things like how far back moments happened, like when Alex asked you out officially and stuff like that.

All of the lads seemed really happy for you and even some of your other friends that were a part of the crew were shocked but buzzing for you. Alex got loads of people saying, ‘You better treat her right’ which made you laugh a lot.

But thankfully it was business as usual, just with the addition of getting to hold his hand and kiss him the odd time when you wanted. You’d rather most of your affection be in private though so not much had really changed on the social front.

Even when you were trying to be discrete about it, you didn’t find it too hard because you were still just the same Y/N and Alex. You’d been friends for years, so the dynamic shift wasn’t all that drastic.

You both were just the same friends that you could walk next to each other and it just be normal. You didn’t have to be touching each other all the time, you’d go walk with Miles or Nick and just go spend time with Alex every now and then.

You were glad that things never felt too different.

You guess the only thing that marginally was different was the first night back on the bus after you’d been staying in the hotel. You were all heading to bed and when you came out of the bathroom after changing, you headed to your own bunk, but then realised you didn’t actually need to.

Alex’s bunk was the top bunk in the middle, so you walked right past your own and straight to his. He was just in his boxers like most of the lads usually were when they slept on this bus.

“Hey.” You say with a big smile.

“Hey.” Alex grins, his messy hair almost falling into his eyes. He makes you smile when he says, “Was just about to come kiss you”

“Vile.” You hear Miles gag from the bunk directly below and you look down at him and frown.

“Miles, he kisses you... What are you on about?” You question, not understanding.

They were literally always touchy feely with each other which you thought was cute and adorable. They’d always been great mates and were close enough to actually perform together using one microphone.

So it made you laugh when Alex lent down over his bunk to say, “Little offended there mate.” to his friend.

Nick bursts out laughing at your backchat and Alex’s hurt and you chuckle along before you glance back to your boyfriend. Once his head was the right way up again you smile at him.

“I can join you for the night now, right?” You ask him and you love the smile that comes to his lips.

He nods, “Course you can.”

So Alex shuffles back in the bunk, enough for you to comfortably jump up and once you lay beside him you can’t stop grinning. It definitely felt weird to be in a bunk with him for everyone to see but it definitely makes you happy, even if it was a tight squeeze.

“Hi” You grin at him as he’s on his side, his back pressed to the wall of the bunk, looking down on you.

“Hey beautiful.” Alex says before he leans down and kisses you.

You of course kiss him back but after a second you quickly part so you can reach down to the curtain and pull it closed. You doubt that Nick wanted to watch from the bunk opposite.

As soon as your lips were back attached to Alex’s though you hear Nick whisper shout to everyone, “It’s starting!”

If your eyes were open, you would have rolled when but you just try to keep the smile off your lips, so you don’t ruin the kiss. And thankfully you both controlled yourselves enough to hold your smiles so you could indulge in a very nice kiss.

“If I hear anything come from that bunk, you don’t want to know what will happen.” Matt calls out loudly and you break apart from the kiss to laugh.

It seems like everyone else found it comical too, but it was even funnier when Jamie asked him, “What are you gunna do? Cry?”

“Fuck off Cookie.” Your brother says back, and you chuckle at that too.

You and Alex keep your curtain closed as the rest of them chat away and you get yourselves comfortable in the bunk. You are basically cuddled together in the bunk, with the duvet over you both, you still on your back and Alex tucked into your neck as he lay on his side.

You were glad you didn’t feel like you were about to roll out of the bunk, so it definitely made sense you were that way around. That and Alex quite liked to pick his head up every few minutes and trap you in another kiss.

A trap you certainly didn’t mind.

Usually when you all got in your bunks, curtains would stay open as you would all chat to each other and one by one curtains would close until you were all knackered and pass out until the next day. So, it wasn’t a shock that tonight you were all talking for quite a while, you and Alex just chatting to each other quietly in your bunk, liking the privacy that the curtain provided.

But after about 15 minutes someone shouted your name, popping yours and Alex’s bubble.

“Y/N?” You hear Jamie call you.

You smile knowing a joke was bound to come your way and respond, “Yeah?”

“I’ve got a question for you.” He informs and you can practically hear him smiling.

You grin at Alex and shout back to Jamie, “Okay, go on.”

“You know because you’re a photographer... Does that mean you take pictures of you and Alex in the bedroom?” Jamie asks teasingly and your immediately roll your eyes, but it doesn’t stop you from playing along.

“Shit.” You say jokingly loud, “How do they know?” You scorn Alex jokingly and he’s just silently laughing.

“Matt.” You call and joke, “Maybe don’t go through that SD card tomorrow.”

Earlier on he asked to see some of the pictures after the gig tonight and you said he could look through them before you started editing them tomorrow.

“I’ll burn it” Matt says back, and you just start silently giggling.

“What are you both up to in there?” You both hear Nick ask.

Alex says in a teasing voice, “Wouldn’t you like to know.”

Both of you have another few kisses in the time between those jokes and the next time you were heckled. But you were just cuddled when they next started joking.

“They are very quiet up there.” You both hear Miles say.

You shake your head and Alex sighs a little as you hear the rest of them chuckle.

“You doing good? You getting it up, Al?” Miles asks and you both feel him punch the top of his bunk, subsequently the bottom of yours.

You aren’t surprised when Alex doesn’t grace him with an answer.

“Very quiet indeed.” Nick laughs, more than likely looking down at Miles so they could share a laugh.

Jamie seems to jump in then with, “They are definitely biting their tongues.”

“Fuck off all of you.” Matt gets defensive but that just makes it comical.

You decided to upset your brother then by pretending to be annoyed when you scorn them, “You’re all really ruining the mood.”

Alex chuckles at that then, even though you weren’t doing anything. That is what made it funnier to him though.

“Sorry, do you need silence for Alex to get you off.” Jamie asks and it makes you roll your eyes at the question.

You reply, “No.” as an idea comes to mind.

“So you don't mind us carrying on talking then?” Miles asks teasingly. You can practically hear the smirk.

You backchat with, “Not if yous don't mind some noises too?”

“Fire away Hun.”

You brother almost shouts in distress, “No don’t. Both of you stay very fucking quiet.”

Jamie defends you both then, “Oh right so it’s alright when you and Breana fuck but when it’s Alex and Y/N you’re suddenly a prude.”

An argument starts out then with Matt defending himself and then Jamie defending you and so on and then it becomes a big thing. But you find it quite funny that Matt is getting annoyed, so you decide to make your own joke too.

“Al” You whisper, and he looks up at you for you to ask him, “Have you ever seen When Harry Met Sally?”

“Yeah, I watched it with you on the last tour.” He whispers back, reminding you.

You remember him doing now. You’d all had a movie night on the bus during the Suck It And See tour and because you were a little depressed they let you choose the film and you chose that one because it made you laugh.

“Okay, good.” You smirk knowing exactly what you were about to do.

Your boyfriend doesn’t yet get it though, so he asks in a whisper, “Why?”

“Alex” You say a bit louder, a smile you couldn’t hold back drawing to your face.

“What babe?” He asks you and you have to close your eyes, so you don’t break and start laughing.

You try to make your voice sound sultrier and you fake moan louder, “Oh god.”

At that though the boys arguing dies down as Alex whispers, “What are you doing?”

You hold your laugh and, “Alex.” falls from your lips in a breathy moan. And it’s loud enough for everyone to hear.

“Y/N, fuck off.” You hear your brother shout, clearly not amused.

You however come straight back with a very load moan of, “Alex fuck.”

“Matt I’m not touching her.” Alex shouts and you open your eyes to see Alex propped up to the side of you, looking at you like he was scared.

You don’t give it a second thought before you gasp even louder, “Right there Al”

You can hear Miles cackling below you both and you don’t let up with the moans you’re making despite wanting to laugh too. Next you raise your hand up to the ceiling of the bunk as if you’re using it to brace yourself, “Fuck.”

“Oh my god, don’t stop.” You plead in a desperate way as you look to your mortified boyfriend.

“Y/N shut up.” Alex whispers, but it just makes you carry on more.

The fake moans fall from you lips, filling the bunks with your pleads and gasps. Alex is still mortified, but the laughter coming from Jamie, Nick, and Miles just fuels you on.

You go fully Sally Albright on them. A series of loud moans leave your lips like:

“Yes Alex yes!”

“Faster.”

“Oh god.”

“Don’t stop!”

Alex shouts over your loud voice, “Matt, I fucking swear I’m not touching her!”

The way you moan, “Fuck Al” seems to just dismiss what Alex said straight away though.

“Stop!” Matt shouts back, obviously angry now.

You immediately contradict in a fake moan, “Don’t stop!”

“Alex!” You all but scream as you bang on the ceiling of the bunk again a few times.

You go to take it a step further, but you’re apparently not allowed, “Fuck, Alex plea-”

Your boyfriend puts his hand over your mouth so you can’t carry on. However, you just start dramatically fake moaning, and it sounds a lot dirtier because his hand is over your mouth.

You carry on until you get a rise out of Matt despite Alex pleading with you to stop with a scared look on his face. But you know your brother was about to stop so you just looked at your boyfriend’s gorgeous brown eyes and carried on.

And before you know it Matt is swearing getting himself out of his bunk and the curtain of yours is practically ripped open. As soon as you see sight of your brother you stop the fake moans completely as if it never happened.

Alex holds both his hands up in the air as if he’s being held at gunpoint. Matt can quite clearly see you're fully clothed and have a massive shit eating grin on your face.

“Damn that was good, thanks Al.” You joke to your boyfriend but you’re looking at your brother.

Matt holds up a finger at you and warns, “You’re on very thin ice right now.”

He looks angry and embarrassed all at once. He’s bright red but looks absolutely fuming so you can’t stop your laugh.

You giggle questioning, “Why because you know your best mate can fuck your sister?”

Jamie bursts out laughing at that and you crumble into a louder laugh.

“Stop it.” Alex gasps, playfully hitting your shoulder once again looking petrified as he glanced from you to your brother.

“I don’t need to hear whatever that was.” Matt scorns you and you’re very quick to give him some backchat.

“Did you just admit to us all that you’ve never given Bre an orgasm? Because if you don’t know what those sounds were then I feel sorry for her.” You joke back trying to be cocky.

Jamie’s laugh echoes through the bus and you can hear Miles cackling from below. You could see Nick gasping for breath in a fit of laughter and Alex gasps in shock from beside you.

“You need to fuck off Y/N.” Matt gives you one more death glare before he stalks back to his bunk.

“Oh pull the drum stick out your arse!” You say getting a little annoyed at how your brother couldn’t take a joke. “You better hope our hotel rooms are never next to each other.”

“Shut the fuck up. I won’t tell you again.” Matt says as he gets back into his bunk and shuts his curtain in a strop.

“Aw…” You pout turning back to Alex in your bunk. You give him a quick kiss and then joke, “Better save the next orgasm for the next hotel Darling.”

“I’m begging you to stop talking.” Alex shakes his head, still looking at you a little shocked that you’d actually done what you just had.

“Don’t worry, I’ll protect you from Matt.” You giggle, and you say louder so the bus can hear you, “He’s not that scary... Just gotta bring up the time he shat himself when we were in the bat house in Chester Zoo and he quietens right down.”

You all hear Matt shout, “Fuck off!”

You and everyone else on the bus, bar Matt, started laughing then and you were still giggling away when you cuddled yourself into your boyfriend's body. Jamie and Miles begin to applaud you during their continued laughter which just makes your giggles difficult to silence.

Alex is still half shocked as he cuddled you into him, loving your humour but not actually believing you just faked an orgasm that loud on a tour bus surrounded by all your mates and your brother. He shakes his head and kisses the top of yours before telling you, “You’re gunna be the death of me.”

“Least it’ll be a fun death.” You joke and Alex laughs.

“You’re right.” Alex chuckles when you look up at him. You're grinning like an idiot and Alex tells you, “I love you, you psycho.”

“Love you too, weirdo.” You grin and proceed to kiss him sweetly.

After the kiss though you actually want to go to sleep in your boyfriend's arms peacefully. So despite Nick, Miles, and Jamie all still chuckling away, you turn back towards the curtain to redraw it and as you do you catch Jamie’s eye.

You wink at him before drawing the curtain and Jamie wolf whistles, which has you and Alex giggling away together as you cuddle yourself into him once more. You kiss Alex once more before playfully calling out to the others who were still laughing, “Night boys”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Thank you for reading x

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thoughtsaboutshows · 3 years ago

Note

“stay with me” 😊

Thanks for sending!

Combining this with @wisteriaxx’s ask of “please don’t go”

This is another post part 3 scene

In the short time she’d known him, Nicholas Scratch had become a staple in Sabrina’s life just as much as the headband that graced her curls. He was usually at her side with a book in his hand and a smirk on his face, ready to flirt his way through the day until she smiled or sent him away. Later he held her hand instead of books and she kissed his smirk rather than pinch her brows at it, usually coming up with some witty response of her own. But as of recently he hadn’t occupied the space next to her and her hand ran cold for lack of holding.

He was usually found on a stool at Dorian’s or in some deep corner of the library where not even Sabrina could find him. He didn’t believe he was worthy of standing at her side anymore. And Sabrina struggled with the battle of dragging him there herself or straight to the witches cell where he’d be locked away, never to hurt her again. Neither option seemed particularly logical, and she made a decision that splitting herself in half was the last irrational thing she’d do. Though loving Nick had never been exactly rational, more like an inevitable dive off a cliff that had been equal parts scary and exhilarating. It hadn’t been the same as loving Harvey, and she’d recovered from him. The crushing blow of loving and losing Nick was more than she could handle most days so she spent her free time outside of the academy and away from Dorian’s, one hundred percent doing it to avoid any chance of seeing him.

The whisperings began slowly, like a leak, trickling here and there and eventually gaining strength. Soon it was like the entire Academy was flooded with the news of their breakup, and Sabrina had never seen so many witches and warlocks flock to one person before. She’d not understood until then, Nick in a circle of love-struck peers, just how much (or rather who) he was missing out on by committing to be with her. An intrusive voice in her head told her he’d eventually be led that way anyways, that he’d grow bored of her, but she just knew that wasn’t true.

Nick hardly paid them any mind anyways, brushing them off with whatever force necessary and locking himself away behind any door that closed. She wished he’d consider running to her side, but that wasn’t who they were anymore. But that still didn’t mean she wanted him to go anywhere.

“Did you hear Nick’s leaving?” She overheard Melvin first, speaking to another student.

“I hear he’s so fucked up he can’t even think straight.” Another witch said another time.

“I can’t blame him for wanting to get out of Greendale. Wherever he’s going, I hope he never comes back.” Someone else whispered during lunch.

Each little bit of information was like an arrow to the heart, and she knew what that felt like. Sabrina eventually got the information out of Zelda, Nick was leaving the coven for an unforeseen amount of time, and may never be back. Even though their relationship was in shambles Sabrina had always thought they’d someday make it back together. But that couldn’t happen if he was gone. As much as she knew he probably needed to leave, one night in a moment of desperation and weakness she teleported herself to his room.

She didn’t knock and just barged in, face red and eyes wide, locking gazes with Nick who was packing up a bag.

“Sabrina-” he started.

“So it’s true.” Sabrina said, doing her best to bite back the tears that were coming on suddenly. “You’re leaving.”

With a deep breath he nodded, and put his hands on his hips.

“Yes.” He pressed his lips together. “I have to go.”

“Why?” She asked him and crossed her arms, stepping a bit closer. “Why do you have to leave.”

“You know why.” He answered her and took another step closer. He reached for her hand, desperate to touch her one last time, but she flinched away as if he’d burned her. “Sabrina, I can’t be here anymore it’s too…it’s too much.”

“But the Coven-with Blackwood…we need you.” She argued but he shook his head. She took a deep breath and then whispered so softly he nearly didn’t hear her, “I need you.”

“You don’t need me, Sabrina Spellman.” The corner of his mouth turned up sadly. “You’ve never needed me.”

“That’s not true.” She shook her head fiercely and wiped away the tears that were now streaming down her face. “I know you know that’s not true.”

Nick's face twisted and he looked down, unable to see her big brown eyes looking at him the way she was.

“You’ll be okay.” He whispered and this time she let him grab at her hands and play with her fingers.

“Nick…”. She breathed out and bit her bottom lip, pleading with him. “Don’t go…please.”

She knew if he walked out the door she’d likely never see him again. And that, she could not fathom. Nick pulled her closer and kissed her forehead, feeling her shiver at the gesture and leaving his lips against her skin for a hair too long.

“Stay with me.” She begged one last time, pleaded with him even more than when she had asked him to kiss her.

“I love you, Spellman.” He told her as he kissed her hair quickly one more time. For the last time. He was gone in a flash before she could say it back, before she could beg him to let her go with him.

He was just gone.

She didn’t sleep a wink that night, crying in her room and placing a charm on her door so not even the strongest magic would allow Ambrose or the Aunties in. Eventually after she emptied all the water in her body through her tears she lay awake in her bed, staring at the ceiling in a daze. She was numb, pushing away the acceptance that Nick was gone for good, forever.

A gust of wind blew against her cheek, and when she turned her head to the window sill Nick was there, looking worse for wear and like he’d just come back from battle. In a way he was, having fought with himself about five minutes after he left, finally giving in and realizing he could never truly leave Sabrina. It seemed the gateway allowing Nick into her room at anytime was still active because he moved about the room quickly, discarding his jacket and shoes and joining her in the bed without a word.

She turned to look at him but he still said nothing, staring at the ceiling and reaching over to grab her hand. She took a deep breath and laid on her back as well, finally letting sleep overtake her. He was gone by the time she woke up but she saw him around the halls the next day, dark circles gone from where they once lived under his eyes. They didn’t speak again, and he didn’t return to her bed.

But he didn’t leave either.

#nabrina #Nabrina prompts #post part 4

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jazy3 · 3 years ago

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Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 18X01

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

I was really excited for the Premiere and I have never been so disappointed in my life. It took me a few days to write this review because I’m just so unimpressed. I feel like the only interesting parts of the Season 18 Premiere were the Meredith and Hayes FaceTime call, Levi in that outfit and Jo with that hair, and the interviews. That's it. I mean Teddy and Owen’s two weddings were interesting if you’re a Teddy and Owen shipper, but I never have been so that didn’t really do anything for me.

The pacing of the episode was super slow and it was just altogether boring. There were also just so many inconsistencies. For example, Teddy and Owen originally planned to get married at the park with just Megan, Farouk, Evelyn, Leo, and Allison which doesn’t make sense because prior to their break up they were talking about planning their dream wedding. Now they finally get married and Richard didn’t even know about it? They asked Megan to fly in, but they didn’t tell their friends at the hospital after they just all attended Maggie and Winston’s wedding two weeks earlier?

It’s also not clear if Meredith knows that they got married which is weird because she’s the main character of the show and was an integral part of Owen’s previous two weddings one of which was held at her house. Also, Amelia and Link weren’t there and it’s not clear if they even knew about the wedding which is weird because Meredith, Amelia, and Link were all present when Owen proposed to Teddy at Christmas at Meredith’s house and they are all co-parenting Leo together.

While I appreciated the shift to a lighter tone and that they chose to have this season exist in a post-COVID alternative universe where we can see the actors faces again without the PPE and return to escapism the Premiere didn't pack the punch I was expecting. The premieres are usually super shocking and action packed and this one just wasn't. It was just boring and all of the most interesting stuff happened off camera during the two weeks between the Season 17 Finale and the Season 18 Premiere which is just stupid.

I saw the priest getting hit by one of the cyclists coming a few minutes before it happened based on the promo and the context of the scene and there wasn't a big shocking event like there usually is. The pace of the Premiere really felt off to me. My friend Amy who I watch with every week described it as the pacing you usually associate with a nice stroll through a moonlit garden. Fine for episode two or three or a connecting episode but not the Premiere. I feel like they really misjudged what fans were looking for and I’m hoping that they do the work and course correct now that the Premiere has aired and the completely dismal fan reaction as come out.

One of the few bright spots for me was the introduction of Peter Gallagher as Dr. David Hamilton. I love him as an actor! He's great! His recent roles in Grace and Frankie and Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist were fantastic! I was super excited when I heard he was coming to Grey's. I like Dr. Hamilton so far and I'm interested to see how his relationship with Ellis and Meredith having dreams about her mother following her battle with COVID will play into the story this season. While it would be interesting to see Meredith work in Minnesota temporarily like Cristina did back in Season 9, I don't want her there permanently. Seattle is as much a character in the show as any of the main characters we've come to love, and something would be missing for me if she moved.

To be perfectly honest, it doesn't make much sense to me for Meredith to move to Minnesota permanently when she only knows a few people there. Who would watch her kids? If she's going to move to me, it makes more sense for her to move to Kansas where Alex is or Switzerland where Cristina is. Her kids have already lost their father and so many other caregivers and Meredith has stuck it out in Seattle for so long after everything that's happened that her moving to Minnesota for me would be bonkers.

Also, where were her kids in the Premiere? All of the interviews that came out prior to the Premiere talked about how Meredith’s focus at the beginning of the season would be on her work and her kids, but they were nowhere to be found in the Premiere and it’s not clear whose watching them while Meredith is in Minnesota. The interviews also made it seem like Meredith and Hayes would still be circling each other at the start of the season with quotes about how timing hadn’t been on their side, that they still needed to have an official drink and go out on a date, and that while Meredith wasn’t looking for a relationship one might find her.

That had literally nothing to do with the Premiere we saw whatsoever! The kids were MIA and it turned out that Meredith and Hayes started dating off screen following Maggie and Winston’s wedding and we didn’t get to see ANY of the firsts they talked about so much over the last two seasons. So stupid. The Premiere was a total rip off. I hate that Nick Marsh is back and I’ve never gone from liking a character and an actor to hating them in such a short period of time ever. My God. I’m so pissed off about this. What the hell were they thinking? Why did they think we would want this at all?

Don’t get me wrong, I loved Nick Marsh as a character and Scott Speedman's portrayal of him when he first showed up in Season 14. I was all ready for him to be Meredith's next great love and I was on board. But then he disappeared and was never heard from again and it was reported that Speedman wanted to take a break from TV for a while so I mourned the loss of what could have been and moved on. I sat through the out of character nonsense that was the DeLuca storyline in the belief that eventually that storyline would end, and Meredith would get a real proper love interest that made sense and would be her post-Derek endgame.

So, I was really excited when they introduced Hayes and I have really come to love his character and his budding relationship with Meredith. I feel like I've been waiting forever to finally see them go on a date and I am super pissed off that we didn't get to see it. I would have loved this storyline with Nick if they had introduced it at any previous point in time, but now after they've spent so much time setting up Meredith and Hayes it's just infuriating. I feel immense rage over how they handled Meredith and Hayes and Meredith and Nick’s storylines in the Premiere. I'm so angry. The whole thing just made no sense. That Premiere should never have aired. It never should have gotten past the draft stage. It was that bad. The first date and all of the firsts that come with a new relationship are the most exciting parts of a romantic storyline for me and I love seeing all of that on screen. They hyped Meredith and Hayes’ relationship up so much and even had the two of them talk about 'firsts' and dating after death so for their first date to happen off screen along with Austin's panic attacks and bad reaction to his Dad starting to date again is just such a rip off.

I have stuck with this show through thick and thin and for them to reward that loyalty by having the most interesting parts of that storyline happen off screen while showing a bunch of stuff on screen with other characters that they could have just told us about? So ridiculous. I was so excited for this season and now I'm just angry. I'm hoping that they are building to a big mid-season finale where Meredith is going to return to Seattle and by that time Bailey will have helped Hayes out with Austin and the two of them will finally get together on screen but I'm starting to feel like every time I get invested in one of the Meredith's new love interests, they pull the rug out from under me and I'm getting really fed up.

In other news, I'm not too surprised that Megan and Riggs broke up off screen only because Virgin River, which I love, just got picked up for two more seasons and I imagine Martin Henderson is busy filming that and it looks like Megan is going to be around for a while and they had to explain it somehow. I loved Meredith and Riggs together and I hated how they ended that storyline so I'm not sad about them breaking up off screen.

The Premiere also broke my heart over Amelia and Link’s storyline. It’s just so stupid. It’s drama for drama’s sake that’s all it is and it’s tired. When did marriage become so important to Link? In the span of a few months, he went from being totally fine with not getting married and checking in with Amelia every few weeks on how she felt to convincing himself that Amelia wanted him to propose so he did so at her sister's wedding and used her dead brother's children to do it. Amelia's right the whole thing was super messed up and manipulative and she was right to say no.

Link decided marriage was important to him and that fostering Luna would be totally fine without ever talking to Amelia. Yes, Amelia should have shared her thoughts with him too, but he also should have paid attention. Now their otherwise healthy relationship is over because she doesn't want to participate in an archaic ritual that involves signing a contract and exchanging vows? That's just stupid. I hope they find a way to work it out and get back together because I really like them as a couple.

I like Dr. Michelle Lin the new Head of Plastic of Surgery that Bailey and Richard are looking to hire. I thought for sure after that photo of the other guy made the rounds on social media that he was going to be the new Head of Plastics, but then he said that he doesn't do "free" and I knew he was out. I'm excited for there to be another female surgeon of colour on the show as the gender and racial balance on the show has been more white and male as of late and I think Grey's is at its best when you have a roughly equal number of women and men and as many different races being represented as possible.

I think it makes the storylines more interesting and authentic and personally gives me more characters that I can identify with. This new doctor seems driven, determined, and could have a potentially interesting dynamic with Richard and Bailey. She’s also giving me some Cristina Yang vibes and I’m all for that. I love Cristina. Always have. Always will. That being said, I'm a bit confused as to where they are going with Jo's storyline as I thought for sure the new Head of Plastics would be a guy and her new love interest. But Bailey did say they still needed to hire a new general surgeon and a new neurosurgeon so maybe one of them will be for her?

I can't really say that there was anything I loved about the Premiere which is disappointing. Jo's parenting hair dye mishap was funny, Levi's outfit cracked me up, and I liked that Bailey agreed to help Hayes out, but that's about it. The thing I was most excited for coming into this season was Meredith finally being back on her feet and seeing the romantic storyline between her and Hayes finally come to fruition.

Finding out that she's going to be in Minnesota for the foreseeable future, she and Hayes started dating off screen but had to call it quits because seeing his Dad date someone new caused Austin to have panic attacks, and finding out that Nick Marsh is back? I hated it. I don't understand how the same person who wrote the Season 16 masterpiece “Snowblind” with that amazing snow scene between Meredith and Hayes wrote the Premiere. I just don't understand. I really hope they're not going to do a love triangle with Meredith, Hayes, and Nick because that would just be so stupid.

She's a forty something award-winning surgeon who's a widowed single mother of three. Love triangles made sense when she was young intern, but at this point it's just dumb. I also didn't feel the chemistry this time around between Meredith and Nick like I did the first time. It felt forced and flat. I like Maggie and Winston together, but I didn't find their storyline in the Premiere particularly engaging. I'm glad that Amelia stayed true to herself, but I hate that Link has decided marriage is the only way forward and that they're still fighting.

The only moment that really made me laugh out of the hour was when Jo opened the door and Levi was in that ridiculous outfit. I loved the FaceTime call between Meredith and Hayes, but I hated the context. Honestly, I'm not really excited about any upcoming storyline this season which makes me really sad. I'm usually super positive and hopeful when it comes to this show, but this episode just stomped all over my dreams. All I can hope for now is that they pull a twist and everything I was hoping for happens in the mid-season finale otherwise I don't think I'm going to like this season very much.

Until next time!

#grey's anatomy #meredith grey #cormac hayes #MerHayes #jo wilson #levi schmitt #atticus lincoln #amelia shepherd #amelink #miranda bailey #richard webber #cristina yang #michelle lin #ellis grey #david hamilton #thoughts #review #18X01 #here comes the sun

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sgtbradfords · 3 years ago

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Spin you ‘round

Thanks to that behind the scenes pic that Eric posted, and a song I heard while my iPod (you read that right) was on shuffle yesterday, had me scrambling to write this fluffy little drabble. Nothing but a quick edit so forgive me. Enjoy! :)

We were gonna dance till they shut it down People'd be staring while I spin you 'round Thinking we were so in love, yeah They wouldn't know we hadn't even hooked up

Tim Bradford was exhausted, and he wasn't the only one. The entire Mid-Wilshire division was running on fumes, some more than others.

It took longer than any of them would have liked to find Angela. They would have preferred to have found her within hours, but as the hours after her abduction turned into a day and then two and soon three, those involved in the search began struggling to remain optimistic.

But, using some unorthodox -yet legal- methods, they were finally able to find out where their friend and fellow officer was being held against her will. And just in the nick of time too.

"Hey." He heard a familiar voice sigh as they sat down next to him on the front porch of Patrice Evers house, a faint hint of perfume permeating the cool air that had escaped from the inside of the house. "It's been a rough few days, huh."

"Yeah." He sighed, setting down the beer bottle in hand as he stared out into the night sky that glowed from the city lights before them. "I'm surprised we get the next few days off."

"I heard." She smiled as her finger danced around the rim of the glass in hand. "Grey pulled some strings?"

"Not exactly, more like the Chief of Police kind of has a soft spot for Angela." Tim said rolling his eyes, turning his head as he gave her an amused grin. "We may not be blood but we’re her family."

Lucy nodded in agreement to that statement, there was a weird friendship between the last group of rookies and training officers that made them stand out. "What are you doing out here, doesn't the Man of Honor need to be inside?"

"Ahh no, Lopez kicked everyone including Wesley, Jackson and I out of the room. I think between us and her family, we were smothering her." He said sheepishly, the amount of concern he still held, evident.

"She's going to be ok Tim."

"I know." He mumbled, turning away as he reached for the bottle at his feet, bringing it up to his lips, taking a generous swig.

"It's going to take time, but she's got a lot of people supporting her."

"I know." He softly but sternly reiterated.

Lucy sighed, knowing that Tim would berate himself over the events of the abduction for weeks to come.

"Are helicopter rides always that bumpy?"

Tim chuckled, "That was relatively smooth, believe it or not."

"Makes me glad I was medicated for my first trip." She confessed as she took a sip from the glass in hand, setting it down onto the brick that made up the porch they occupied before looking up into the night sky.

Tim abruptly stood, Lucy's attention turning to him as he held out his hand.

"Now?" She asked with eyes growing wide, promptly placing her left hand in his. "I'm not sure now is a perfect time."

"There'll never be a perfect time." He told her as he led them away from the coverage of the house. "There will always be something."

"But I-"

"Don't care Lucy." He said as he stopped in the middle of the small flower garden that made up the front lawn, turning to face Lucy as he placed his left hand on her waist. "I don't need a suit and you don't need a dress to dance."

Lucy chuckled as she dropped the hand in hers, wrapping her arms around the back of his neck as she stepped closer. "I must warn you, I'm not the most graceful of dancers."

Tim gave her an incredulous look, his right hand finding its place on the other side of her hip as they began to sway. "I've seen your TikToks."

"That's different." She blushed as she shied away. "Those dances are coordinated, I'm not."

"Just follow my lead Luce."

Lucy raised a brow at the nickname, Tim looking away to avoid her gaze. "Don't." He said, looking away as she bit the corner of her lip, failing to hold back her grin.

"I wasn't going to say anything."

Tim gave her a glare that packed no punch before his features softened, giving her a soft smile.

The past eighty hours had more ups and downs than a rollercoaster, but right then, there was no place either of them would rather be.

#q #chenford fanfic #chenford fic #the rookie fic #fanfic #chenford

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rottingflovver · 4 years ago

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Like a fly in a spider's web

(Slight)Yandere!Fyodor x reader

Prompt: he's been stalking you for a while now. Someone this innocent and pure looking ㅡ he couldn't imagine himself letting you out of his sight. The world was filled with sinners...yet you...you were an angel. He needed to find out what this weird fascination with you was. What was it that always prompted him to go back to you?

Tw: slight blood mentions, also manipulation on Fyodor's side (and stalking!)

It was a day like any other. Fyodor sipped on his coffee; black and packed with sugar, just how he liked it. He observed you. Sitting alone at the two-person table, scrolling through a (phone case color) phone. Your eyes wandered from side to side, gazing at the screen with a bored expression; it astounded him how you could look so serene while doing something so normal. Something so offensively human. Your order, today, was the same as always: apple-cinnamon tea, with one tablespoon of sugar. You sipped on it absentmindedly.

He knew. Of course he did. You must have noticed him by now. There was no possible way you could've missed him; always being at the same place, at the same time, eyes always glued to you. Theoretically speaking, he could have been much more careful. Much more secreted and hidden, even in plain sight like so, given that it wasn't as obvious. And yet...here he was, and there you were. Staring at him, like he stared at you.

Perhaps he wanted to be noticed.

He wondered: would you brush it off as a coincidence? Would you confront him? Run away? Which behavior would be best suited for an angel ㅡ he was eager to find out.

You stood up.

Wait...this...wasn't right. Your cup of tea stood half-empty, the train you always took nowhere near arriving time. He knew you couldn't escape his grasp, even if you were to flee now ㅡ so why did he feel as though something valuable had just been lost? Like a pearl being snatched out of the clam it formed in, your graceful frame moved forward, towards the counter. A cheerful barista stood there, gladly taking your money. "Keep the change," you mouthed, and he guessed the words. How rude. Don't you know that tipping is considered impolite in Japan?

Ah. Fyodor hadn't noticed it, or maybe he ignored it, but his teeth bit down harder and harder on his thumb the more you moved towards him. And by the time you stood there, right in front of his slouched form, he bit right through the tender skin of it. The familiar taste of iron filled his mouth.

"Your thumb is bleeding," your voice rang out, just as pleasant as he had imagined it. A pair of concerned eyes stared at his bleeding mess of a finger, not saying anything else about it ㅡ but it was clear that you disliked the sight. So; you chose to confront him. Right here. Right now.

"Ah...so it is." His eyes glanced at it briefly. Nothing he wasn't used to. However, he never took the time to properly look at whatever wound he caused himself ㅡ chewing on his fingers was something instinctive, after all. To see it gushing and bleeding out like this; he understood why you'd be repulsed by it.

"May I sit down?"

Intriguing. The corners of his mouth turned slightly upwards, subconsciously. "I don't see why not," he said, voice as soft as cotton candy.

A sigh escaped from your lips as you sat down. He never noticed it before, he never got close enough to do so, but the color of your eyes ㅡ they were (e/c). Oddly, it felt like you were closer now. And yet you stared at him with such intensity, such harshness, it could hardly ever be described. It sent chills down his spine; not the idea of you hurting him, he knew you were powerless against him, but the idea of you hating him.

"Hey," you brought him back to reality. Tired eyes landed on your form, as your hands ran through (h/c) hair, "have you been stalking me?"

He had to laugh.

Well, it was more of a dry chuckle, but you... You were so calm! So calm, while confronting a devil. Now this was beginning to be amusing. Mouth stretched from ear to ear, his eyes were barely open. He hummed. "Who knows?" As he rested his head on his open palm, he leaned forwards; closing the gap between you. You had to fight the instinct of backing away ㅡ he’d think of you as weak if you did so. And yet, when he opened his eyes, you felt as though pure adrenaline had been pumped into your veins. Just who...was this guy? Messy hair obscured his face, but his wide grin was still visible. "Have I?"

Unsettling was the only word that you could describe him with at the moment. Everything about him: from the way he spoke in a sing-song voice to the calm way of carrying himself, everything was off. You were reluctant to even look at him. But at the same time…it was like you were drawn to him. His eyes traced your every move, a bright violet color ㅡ yet they appeared so lifeless; hollow. Like he didn't have any reason to live.

You stared at him, and he stared at you.

From a stranger's perspective it must've looked like you were both in a trance with one another, fully mesmerized. Him; slouched over the table, fondly gazing at you, and you; tensely sitting up straight, hands running through your hair as a nervous tick.

"Well?" He finally spoke, nicking his head to the right. Strands of raven hair fell in front of his eyes, but he didn't seem bothered. "Have I? Do you know the answer?" There was an obvious tone of amusement in his voice ㅡ he was enjoying this.

It felt like you were caving in on yourself. A sudden flush of embarrassment overcame you ㅡ what if he was just messing with you? Have you...accused someone innocent of doing something as horrible as stalking? You looked around. Everyone else seemed to be having pleasant conversations, a light echo of j-pop music being played from the speakers. "Well, uh…" you looked back at the man sitting opposite of you, "I'm sorry, maybe I simply imagined it…"

He almost seemed dissatisfied with that. For a split second, you could've sworn you saw him frown ㅡ but an inviting smile was back on his lips in no time. He shrugged. "Could be. Maybe it's because I'm a foreigner, so your eyes were naturally drawn to me? It just so happens that we're at the same place at the same time," he proposed, while picking up his cup of coffee. As he sipped on it happily, it occurred to you that he really was a foreigner; when he spoke, he even had quite a noticeable accent. Russian, perhaps? But you swore you had seen him multiple times it just...didn't make sense. His words shook you to the core, yet he looked at you so calmly. "Honestly…it seems like you're the stalker here," he worded the sentence like a joke, but neither of you laughed.

"I… I'm sorry," you stood up from where you sat, speaking quietly as to not cause a scene. "I'm so sorry, that sounds horrible I didn't mean to accuse you like that, I-"

He raised a hand, signaling you to sit back down. "Calm down, it's nothing to apologize for… Since you're already here; care to join me for a cup of coffee? It's awfully lonely."

…You sat back down ㅡ although, reluctantly. To fight the awkwardness floating in the air, you cleared your throat. "Sure, maybe we could start over. This was…" guilt crawled up your back as you spoke, avoiding eye contact, "a terrible first impression." It bewildered you why he would even choose to continue a conversation that started this rough. Maybe it was out of pure boredom. Maybe he was intrigued by you. Or maybe…he really was simply lonely.

Yet the smile he offered seemed genuine. "Perfect." He finished the last of his coffee, gesturing for the barista to come back. "Let's start with introductions, shall we? I'm Fyodor Mihaelovich Dostoevsky ㅡ and you?"

And like a fly caught in a spider's web, you fell right into his unforgiving hands.

all this happens while his thumb is still bleeding he’s so extra

jbvhdjbvhjf I??? hope you liked it??? I’m really nervous about this ffkvcuhr I hope I did Fyofyo SOME kind of justice, at least like, a lil bit

#bungou stray dogs #bsd #Fyodor x reader #bsd Fyodor x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #Fyodor Dostoevsky #the pov change in the middle of the fic tho #also I think fyodor would be really into innocent people #like yk someone who has never ever done anything wrong #because of his whole sinners worldview #ya get it

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aceofwhump · 4 years ago

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Favorite aftercare scenes?

Oh my god I spent so long thinking about this!! I spent so long thinking about what is considered “after care” and made sure I caught all my favorites and omg I spent so long on this lol.

So these are some of my favorite after care scenes in no particular order. I know I forgot some important ones, I just KNOW it, but this got long so all well lol.

Graceland 3x08. The entire withdrawal scene/ice bath scene is the best caretaking scene ever. The whole team is involved and helps him through it and it’s the best.

Graceland 1x10. The team taking care of Mike after he gets beaten up by Bello in jail while still recovering from a gunshot wound

Graceland 3x02. Mike is home after his near death experience and is sleeping on the couch at night and Briggs brings him his suit cause he can’t go up the steps yet.

Graceland 3x07. Charlie talking to Mike after the disastrous intervention is a great example of emotional after care. She checked in on him and there was crying and just lots of good stuff.

Graceland 1x09. The team bringing Mike flowers and stuffed animals when he’s in the hospital after getting stabbed

Supergirl 2x07. Kara taking care of Mon-El in her apartment after he got shot in the leg. She puts an ice pack on his leg and gets him food and they’re just generally super cute

Supergirl 3x07. Kara holding Mon-El’s hand and touching his face and caressing his hair by his bedside in the DEO infirmary after he returns

Outlander 5x09. Basically the entire episode is full of caretaking/after care scenes for Jamie’s snakebite and it’s fucking beautiful.

Outlander 5x08. The small ways that Brianna, Jamie, Claire, Fergus, and Marsali take care of Roger while he’s suffering from PTSD after his hanging is so good. Like how Marsali plays cards with him, Brianna finds a way to talk to him, etc.

Eureka 3x14. Jo taking care of Zane in the infirmary after he is nearly frozen to death. She brings him all his favorites food and stuff and it’s adorable

911 Lone Star 1x09. It’s short but there’s a scene where Owen is taking care of TK after he’s released from the hospital and it was nice. He’s like “you need a pillow. you look uncomfortable” and just generally fussing and it’s so damn cute.

White Collar 1x10. Peter and Elizabeth taking care of Neal after he gets drugged. They give him ice for his headache and he’s laying on their couch.

Emerald City 1x01/1x02. Dorothy taking care of Lucas both when she takes him off the cross and later when he collapses and is poisoned.

MacGyver 4x03 (original not reboot). MacGyver is in a car accident and the whole episode is this Amish family taking care of him.

Bones 1x15. The hospital scenes for this episode are just A+

Downton Abbey 6x08. That little scene when George brings Thomas an orange after his suicide attempt.

NCIS 2x23 have some great after care scene revolving around Tony getting pneumonic plague. Like how everyone keeps making him lay down and rest. Or when Gibbs hands him McGees food cause he needs to eat.

Hawaii Five-0 1x23. Danny at the hospital and Steve and Grace looking after him

The A-Team 5x13. The final scene is Face back home from the hospital after being shot, on the couch with a blanket over him, and the team is bringing him pizza and looking after him.

Grimm 3x02. OMG this one is so good cause 90% of the episode is the group looking after Nick once he’s no longer a zombie but my favorite scenes are when he’s asleep at home and Juliette is laying next to him, when he’s unconscious after getting the injection and their surrounding his bedside and Juliette is holding his hand, and the scene when he wakes up and they’re all worried about him.

Burn Notice 2x09. After Michael is blown up and thrown onto his car I love the bits where Sam is looking after him like when Michael stumbles and Sam grabs his arm to steady him.

Hawaii Five-0 3x10. Danny getting the bullet removed from his arm by the Aloha Girls troop leader

Grimm 1x08. Every scene once he enters the hospital after getting beaten up! Also that tiny scene when Juliette cradles his body close as he passes out.

Outlander 1x01. Claire taking care of Jamie’s shoulder and bullet wound throughout the episode.

Doctor Who 2x01. When Rose is taking care of the 10th Doctor while he sleeps.

I know I’m missing some Stargate, Leverage, and Hawaii Five-0 scenes but my mind is totally blanking right now.

#whump #mod post #mod replies #ask #anon #after care #after care scenes #caretaking #caretaking sceens #mods favorite whump scenes #whump scenes #whump lists #Anonymous

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letterboxd · 4 years ago

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Best of SXSW 2021.

From properly good Covid comedies to an epic folk-horror doc and an Indigenous feminist Western, the Letterboxd Festiville team reveals their ten best of SXSW Online.

We dug out old lanyards to wear around the house, and imagined ourselves queuing up the block from The Ritz (RIP). We dialled into screenings and panels, and did our level best to channel that manic “South By” energy from our living rooms.

The SXSW festival atmosphere was muted, and that’s to be expected. But the films themselves? Gems, so many gems, whether shot in a fortnight on the smell of an oily stimulus check, or painstakingly rotoscoped over seven years.

When we asked SXSW Film director Janet Pierson what she and her team were looking for this year, she told us: “We’re always looking for films that do a lot with little, that are ingenious, and pure talent, and discovery, and being surprised. We’re just looking for really good stories with good emotional resonance.” If there was one common denominator we noticed across this year’s SXSW picks, it was a smart, tender injection of comedy into stories about trauma, grief, unwanted pregnancy, chronic health conditions, homelessness, homophobia and, yes, Covid.

It’s hard to pick favorites, but here are the ten SXSW features and two short films we haven’t stopped thinking about, in no particular order.

Recovery Directed by Mallory Everton and Stephen Meek, written by Everton and Whitney Call

“Covid 19 is in charge now” might be the most hauntingly funny line in a SXSW film. In Recovery, two sisters set out on a haywire road trip to rescue their grandmother from her nursing home in the wake of a severe Covid 19 outbreak. There’s no random villain or threat, because isn’t being forced to exist during a pandemic enough of a threat in itself? If ever we were worried about “Covid comedies”, SXSW managed to flush out the good ones. (Read about the Festiville team’s other favorite Covid-inflected comedies, including an interview with the directors of I’m Fine (Thanks for Asking).)

Alex Marzona praises the “off-the-charts chemistry” between leads Mallory Everton and Whitney Call. Best friends since they were nine, the pair also wrote the film, with Everton co-directing with Stephen Meek. Every laugh comes from your gut and feels like something only the cast and crew would usually be privy to. “You can tell a lot of the content is improvised, which just attests to their talent,” writes Emma. Recovery doesn’t make you laugh awkwardly about how awful the last year has been—rather, it reminds you that even in such times there are still laughs to be had, trips to be taken, family worth uprooting everything for. Just make sure you’ve packed enough wet wipes for the road, and think long and hard about who should babysit your mice. —EK

The Spine of Night Written and directed by Morgan Galen King and Philip Gelatt

Don’t get too attached to any characters from its star-studded cast—nobody is safe (or fully-clothed) in The Spine of Night’s raw, ultra-violent and cynical world. Conjured over the last seven years, directors Philip Gelatt and Morgan Galen King’s rotoscoped epic recaptures the dazzling imagination and scope of their influences Ralph Bakshi and Heavy Metal. Approaching an anthology-style structure to explore how ‘absolute power corrupts absolutely’—a proverb more potent now than when Gelatt and King began their project—the film packs a franchise’s worth of ideas in its 90-minute runtime. Though the storytelling justifiably proves itself overly dense for some, it will find the audience it’s after, as other Letterboxd members have declared it “a rare treat” and “a breath of fresh air in the feature-length animation scene”. For sure, The Spine of Night can join Sundance premieres Flee and Cryptozoo in what’s already a compelling year for unique two-dimensional animation. —JM

Kambole Campbell caught up with Gelatt and King (who are also Letterboxd members!) during SXSW to talk about animation inspirations and rotoscoping techniques.

The Drover’s Wife: The Legend of Molly Johnson Written and directed by Leah Purcell

Snakes, steers and scoundrels beware! Writer-director-star Leah Purcell ably repurposes the Western genre for Aboriginal and female voices in The Drover’s Wife. Molly Johnson is a crack-shot anti-heroine for the ages, in this decolonized reimagining of a classic 1892 short story by Henry Lawson. And by reimagining, we mean a seismic shift in the narrative: Purcell has fleshed out a full story of a mother-of-four, pregnant with her fifth, a missing husband, predatory neighbors, a mysterious runaway and a young English couple on different paths to progress in this remote Southern land. Purcell first adapted this story for the stage, then as published fiction; she rightly takes the leading role in the screen version, too.

As a debut feature director, Purcell (Goa-Gunggari-Wakka Wakka Murri) already has a firm grip on the macabre and the menacing, not shying away from violence, but making very careful decisions about what needs to be depicted, given all that Molly Johnson and her family are subjected to. She also sneaks in mystic touches, and a hint of romance (local heartthrob Rob Collins can take us on a walk to where the Snowy widens to see blooming wildflowers anytime). Judging by early Letterboxd reviews, it’s not for everyone, but this is Australian colonization through an Indigenous feminist’s eyes, with a fierce, intersectional pay-off. “Extremely similar to a vast majority of the issues and themes explored in The Nightingale,” writes Claira. “I’m slowly realizing that my favorite type of Westerns are Australian.” —LK, GG

Swan Song Written and directed by Todd Stephens

Udo Kier is often the bridesmaid, rarely the bride. Now, after a lifetime of supporting roles ranging from vampires and villains to art-house muse, he finally gets to shine center-stage in Swan Song. Kier dazzles as a coiffure soothsayer in this lyrical pageant to the passage of queer times in backwater Sandusky, Ohio. “He is absolutely wonderful here,” writes Adrianna, “digging deep and pulling out a mesmerizing, deeply affecting and emotionally textured performance, proving that he’s an actor with much more range than people give him credit for.”

A strong supporting cast all have melancholy moments to shine, with Linda Evans (Dynasty), Michael Urie (Ugly Betty) and Jennifer Coolidge (Legally Blonde) along for the stroll. Surreal camp touches add joy (that chandelier, the needle drop!) but by the end, the tears roll (both of joy and sadness). Writer-director Todd Stephens ties up his Sandusky trilogy in this hometown homage, a career peak for both him and Kier. Robert Daniels puts it well, writing that Swan Song is “campy as hell, but it’s also a heartfelt LGBTQ story about lost lovers and friends, vibrant memories and the final passage of a colorful life.” —LK

Leo Koziol spoke with Todd Stephens and Udo Kier during SXSW about Grace Jones, David Bowie and dancing with yourself.

Islands Written and directed by Martin Edralin

Islands is a Mike Leigh-esque story that presents a Canadian Filipino immigrant family full of quirk and character, centered around Joshua, a reticent 50-year-old homebody son. The story drifts in and out of a deep well of sadness. Moments of lightness and familial love make the journey worthwhile. “A film so Filipino a main plot device is line-dancing,” writes Karl. “Islands is an incredibly empathetic film about what it’s like to feel unmoored from comfort. It’s distinctly Filipino and deals with the psychology of Asian culture in a way that feels both profound and oddly comforting.” In a year in which we’ve all been forced to physically slow down, Islands “shows us how slow life can be,” writes Justin, “and how important it is to be okay with that.” Rogelio Balagtas’s performance as Joshua—a first-time leading role—won him the SXSW Grand Jury Award for Breakthrough Performance. —LK

Ninjababy Directed by Yngvild Sve Flikke, written by Flikke with Johan Fasting and Inga H. Sætre

Ninjababy is as ridiculous as its title. When 23-year-old Rakel finds herself accidentally pregnant, scheduling an abortion is a no-brainer. But she’s way too far along, she’s informed, so she’s going to have to have the baby. The ensuing meltdown might have been heartbreaking if the film wasn’t so damn funny. Ninjababy draws on the comforting and familiar (“Lizzie McGuire if she was a pregnant young adult,” writes Nick), while mixing shock with originality (Erica Richards notices “a few aggressive and vulgar moments [but] somehow none of it seemed misplaced”).

An animated fetus in the style of Rakel’s own drawings appears to beg and shame Rakel into motherhood while she fights to hold onto her confidence that not wanting to be a mother doesn’t make her a bad person. Ninjababy’s greatest feat is its willingness to delve into that complication: yes, it’s righteous and feminist and 21st-century to claim your own body and life, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy to turn away from something growing inside of you. It’s a comedy about shame, art, finding care in unlikely places—and there’s something in it for the gents, too. The titular ninjababy wouldn’t leave Rakel alone, and it’s unlikely to leave you either. Winner of the SXSW Global Audience Award. —SH

The Fallout Written and directed by Megan Park

Canadian actress Megan Park brought the youthful wisdom of her days on the teen drama series The Secret Life of the American Teenager to her first project behind the camera, and it paid off. Following the scattered after-effects of a school shooting, The Fallout may be the most acute, empathetic depiction of childhood trauma on screen in recent memory. “It sneaks up on you with its honesty and how it spends time with its lead, carried so beautifully by Jenna Ortega. Even the more conventional moments are poignant because of context,” writes Kevin L. Lee. Much of that “sneaky” honesty emerges as humor—despite the heavy premise, moments of hilarity hang on the edges of almost every scene. And Ortega’s portrayal of sweet-but-angsty Vada brings self-awareness to that humor, like when Vada’s avoidant, inappropriate jokes with her therapist reveal her desperation, but they garner genuine laughs nonetheless.

In this debut, Park shows an unmatched understanding of non-linear ways that young people process their pain. Sometimes kids try drugs! Sometimes they scream at their parents! But more often than not, they really do know what they want, who loves them, and how much time they need to grieve (see also: Jessie Barr’s Sophie Jones, starring her cousin Jessica Barr, out now on VOD and in theaters). The Fallout forsakes melodrama to embrace confusion, ambiguity and joy. Winner of both the SXSW Grand Jury and Audience Narrative Feature Awards, and the Brightcove Illumination Award. —SH

Ludi Directed by Edson Jean, written by Jean and Joshua Jean-Baptiste

When Ludi begins, it’s quiet and dreamy. The film’s opening moments conjure the simple pleasures of the titular character’s Haitian heritage: the music, the colors, the people. Ludi (Shein Monpremier) smiles to herself as she starts her morning with a tape recording her cousin mailed from Haiti to Miami, and listens as her family members laugh through their troubles before recording an upbeat tape of her own. But that’s where the dreaminess ends—Ludi is an overworked, underpaid nurse picking up every shift she possibly can in order to send money home. Writer-director Edson Jean fixates on the pains and consequences of Ludi’s relentless determination, which comes to a head when she moonlights as a private nurse for an old man who doesn’t want her there.

Ashton Kinley notes how the film “doesn’t overly dramatize or pull at false emotional strings to make its weight felt. The second half of the feature really allows all of that to shine, as the film becomes a tender and empathetic two-hander.” George’s (Alan Myles Heyman) resentment of his own aging body steps in as Ludi’s antagonist. Jean throws together jarring contrasts: George throwing Ludi out of the bathroom, followed by Ludi’s memories of home, followed by another lashing out, followed by a shared prayer. The tension is unsustainable. By interspersing the back-breaking predicament of a working-class immigrant with the sights and sounds of the Caribbean, Ludi elegantly, painfully reveals what the cost of a dream can be. —SH

Woodlands Dark and Days Bewitched: A History of Folk Horror Written and directed by Kier-La Janisse

Building on the folk horror resurgence of films like The Witch and Midsommar, Kier-La Janisse’s 193-minute documentary Woodlands Dark and Days Bewitched is a colossal, staggering undertaking that should school even the most seasoned of horror buffs. “Thorough is an understatement,” says Claira.

Combining a historian’s studied, holistic patience with a cinephile’s rabid, insatiable thirst, the film, through the course of six chapters, broadens textbook British definitions, draws trenchant socio-political and thematic connections, debunks myths and transports viewers to far-flung parts of the globe in a way that almost feels anthropological. As Jordan writes, “Three hours later and my mind is racing between philosophical questions about the state of hauntology we generationally entrap ourselves in, wanting to buy every single one of the 100+ films referenced here, and being just a bit in awe of Janisse’s truly breathless work.” An encyclopedic forest worth losing yourself in—get ready for those watchlists to balloon. Winner of the SXSW Midnighters Audience Award. —AY

Introducing, Selma Blair Directed by Rachel Fleit

There’ll likely be some level of hype when this intimate collaboration between actress Selma Blair and filmmaker Rachel Fleit comes out later in the year on Discovery+, and that’s okay, because that is Blair’s intention in sharing the details of her stem-cell transplant for multiple sclerosis. There’d be little point in going there if you are not prepared to really go there, and Introducing, Selma Blair is a tics-and-all journey not just into what life is like with a chronic condition, a young son, and a career that relies on one’s ability to keep a straight face. It’s also an examination of the scar tissue of childhood, the things we are told by our parents, the ideas we come to believe about ourselves. “I almost felt like I shouldn’t have such intimate access to some of the footage in this documentary,” writes Andy Yen. “Bravo to Selma for allowing the filmmakers to show some truly raw and soul-bearing videos about her battle with multiple sclerosis that make us feel as if we are as close to her as family.” —GG

Femme Directed by Sam H. Freeman and Ng Choon Ping

I May Destroy You fans, rejoice: Paapa Essiedu, who played Arabella’s fascinating best friend Kwame, takes center stage in Sam H. Freeman and Ng Choon Ping’s intoxicating short film Femme. It’s a simple premise—Jordan, a femme gay man, follows his drug dealer (Harris Dickinson, mastering the sexually repressed brusque young man like no one else) home to pick up some goods on a night out. Except, of course, it’s not that simple. The co-directors build a world of danger, tension and electricity, with lusciously lensed scenes that lose focus as the threat rises. Frankie calls it “hypnotizing and brutal and gorgeous” and we couldn’t agree more. A crime thriller wrestling with hyper-masculinity seen through the eyes of an LGBTQ+ character, with a sucker-punch ending to boot, the world needs more than twenty minutes of this story. —EK

Play It Safe Directed by Mitch Kalisa

If you (unwisely) thought that the vulnerable, progressive environment of drama school would be a safe space for Black students, Play It Safe confirms that even a liberal bunch of actors (and their teacher) are capable of being blind to their own egregiously racist microagressions. Mitch Kalisa’s excellent short film explores structural prejudice head-on, in an electric acting exercise that rests on where the kinetic, gritty 16mm camera is pointing at every pivotal turn. At first, we’re with Black drama student Jonathan Ajayi as he receives the assignment; then we are with the rest of the class, exactly where we need to be. “Literally in your face and absolutely breathtaking,” writes Nia. A deserving winner of the SXSW Grand Jury and Audience narrative shorts prizes. —GG

Follow the Festiville team on Letterboxd

#sxsw #south by southwest #sxsw 2021 #sxswonline #SXSW Film #janet pierson #film festival #letterboxd #letterboxd best

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fossntwriter · 4 years ago

Text

Is that mine?

Bucky Barnes x Reader

summary: you mistake Steve’s sweatshirt for Bucky’s and the team is stunned by his reaction.

A/N: sorry for any mistakes and I hope you all think this one is cute!

You and Steve were close from the get go. He was the first person you met when Fury welcomed you to the Avengers. Tony gave you the floor beneath Steve’s when you first came since he knew how comfortable you were with him.

You had abilities similar to Natasha in the way that you moved quick, efficiently and quietly. You were agile and cautious when fighting but also moved with such grace and strength that you could take on multiple guys at once despite your petite figure. From your physical appearance, one might think that you’re a nurse and take care of people-when in reality, you’ve been an assassin for most of your life and worked to end lives instead of save them.

Even though you thought you were off the grid and worked like a ghost, Phil Coulson had somehow still found you hence why one morning he was knocking on your door and recruiting you to work with SHIELD and the Avengers.

“No thank you.” You had said and tried slamming the door in his face after you recovered from your initial shock at being discovered by him and Nick Fury. But Phil’s hand was quick and stopped the door from shutting back into it’s place in the door frame and welcomed himself inside.

You turned around to him with annoyance evident in your eyes and was only met with a glint of determination in his and a hopeful smile that rested easily on his face. You were shocked that a guy who knew what you did with your spare time wasn’t afraid to be in the same room as you. You intimidated people with a mear glance their way.

“I don’t remember inviting you in.”

“You didn’t.” He gave you a smug smile and walked in your direction through your tiny living quarters. “But I believe we could make an exchange if you just hear me out.”

You rolled your eyes. “I don’t want to hear you out. I’m not interested in your little team of miss fits who destroy things when they think they’re doing good.”

He looked taken aback. “Look. I’m going to be honest with you here. No, SHIELD is not perfect, but we have same intentions that you do.”

“Oh yeah? What’s that?” You asked disbelievingly with a small chuckle as your crossed your arms over your chest.

Instead of answering your question, he looked you over as if he was an x-ray scanning over someone for injuries of damage. You stare became hard and the tension in the room became palpable. It went from something that seemed like it was going to be a lighthearted and persuasive debate about you joining his team to him trying to figure you out and you not liking it.

You-like many assassins/superheroes-had an incredibly horrific past and backstory to how you got started on this path of cold killing. You hated thinking about it. About the time you and your family were sitting at the beach on a sunny Tuesday afternoon in summer. Both your parents had that day off and you and your siblings had to school. You were only fifteen years old. Your younger brother was nine, and your one older brother and one older sister were both seventeen. It was supposed to be a nice day relaxing in the cool waters and making sand castles with the damp sand on shoreline of the beach.

The other families around you had the same thoughts. “This is a nice day to go to the beach” or “let’s have a family day.” It was nice outside so of course there was a lot of people there. Maybe that’s why they picked that day to do it.

The shooters.

One minute your older brother was helping you build your sand castle and the next a gunshot rang out and his body went limp beside you. Instant chaos ensued the beach as people ran away to try and find safety from the shooters. But, you were glued to your spot. Looking at the sight before you that was your dead older brother with blood still rushing out of the hole in his head.

You finally tore your eyes away from his dead body only to meet the sight of your sisters lifeless eyes on her beach towel a couple of feet away. A gunshot wound right through her chest. You didn’t know what to do. Two of the people who loved the most lay dead right before your young eyes, your younger brother and parents nowhere to be seen. Where they dead too?

You stood on the sand looking around at strangers running around with panicked looks in their eyes. They were calling out names of their loved ones and friends, hoping and praying for a response to know that they weren’t dead. You saw the horror-stricken looks on everyone’s faces and the tears that leaked from scared eyes down sunburned cheeks.

You didn’t know where to go, but you knew that you couldn’t stay there even if you didn’t want to leave your lifeless family. You felt selfish for running away from your siblings even if they were already dead. You felt like coward. But how else could you feel? You were a fifteen year-old girl who knew nothing about the situation of a mass shooting and had no self-defense. But you knew you had to run. You ran through the midst of everyone else’s shouting and rapid need to find somewhere safe. You called out your parents and brothers name but never got a response. Maybe it was because they had already fled the scene. Maybe it was because they couldn’t hear you over everyone else screaming and crying. Or maybe it was because they were dead too.

But you didn’t know. But you had to keep moving.

You don’t know how you made it off the beach. It felt like after hours of tripping over other people trying to find a way out, that you actually did. You were blocks away from the beach at this point. Maybe miles, you weren’t sure. You slowed down to catch your breath and that’s when the adrenaline and shock left your body. You started to cry. Tears for the lives of your family that was took. Tears for the heartbreak and hurt you and many others faced. Tears that you were alive and given a second chance but your family wasn’t.

You sobbed on the sidewalk in front of a house that belonged to someone you never met before. You crumpled to the ground and wrenched out your shattering and heartbreaking cries of the moments you just experienced. The horrors you just witnessed were sure to by burned into the back of your mind for the rest of your life. The empty and colorless eyes of your brother and sister with blood rapidly staining the crystal-like sand beneath them were to plague your nightmares for years to come and maybe for the rest of your life ahead of you.

After that terrible day at the beach, after you officially found out you were the only survivor out of your family, you didn’t trust anyone. You lived with your aunt, uncle, and older cousin until you graduated high school. After graduation day, you packed your duffel bag with a picture of your family, your favorite articles of clothing, some food and money and took off. You went off the grid. Never spoke to any of your friends or family again. You cut off all ties to the outside world and only kept thoughts and hopes for revenge in the forefront of your mind.

You started training yourself. Went to a self-defense class and continued to teach yourself from there. You set up a target on the inside of your closet door and threw daggers at it until your aim was impeccable. You kept training and fighting. You took jobs from others for money. You did the job cleanly and quickly. It kept you on your feet and able to afford rent while also making you accomplish what you wanted to accomplish- hunt people who hunted others.

Maybe that’s why you accepted his offer to the team. You could get farther and train better with the Avengers. That’s why the next day you were introduced to Nick Fury and Maria Hill before officially meeting the team.

It’s been a little over a year and a half since that day you met the world famous Avengers. They weren’t as bad as you thought. You and Natasha got along nicely. You both trained well together because you had skill sets that were practically the same. You were closest with Steve though, maybe because he went through losing loved ones as often as you did. His mom and dad and his best friend, although Bucky was with the Avengers again.

You and Steve were inseperable (except for the times you were with Natasha). You helped him catch up with new technology, bands, movies, books and everything. He continued to teach you how to fight better and improve.

Since meeting these people, you truly felt happier. It took you a while to adjust and feel more at ease. It took you time to trust them. It didn’t come without it’s hardships though. You were always on edge and scanned a room before you walked into it making sure that it was clear of danger. You never started any conversations with members of the team and you tried to sit alone whenever you could.

Most movie nights you didn’t come to. You stowed away into your room and just thought about how different your life could’ve been. You thought about how if you never went to the beach that day, you could be happily married with kids right now. You could be over at your parents house every holiday with your siblings and their families. But you aren’t. You’re going on missions to stop people from doing bad things and your stopping bad groups of people from taking over the world and killing off half the planet.

On those nights that you didn’t go watch a movie in the living room with your new family, the one person who understood you a little, would come up and check on you. He would keep you company. Steve. He told you stories about the war. About how small he used to be. About Peggy and Bucky. It made you feel at ease and you trusted him sooner than you did anybody else. But after you found trust and a friendship in Steve, it came quickly and naturally for the rest of the team as well.

Now you go to every movie night, talk to all the members and take part in whatever you can.

You keep Tony company in his lab whenever he’s working on his suit. Occasionally, he’ll let you help out and teach you a few things a long the way. This new family has helped you be yourself again. They gave you something worth fighting for. Only, this time it’s not about fighting other people- they gave you something that makes you want to keep fighting to do better. You’ve learned a lot from these people and even though at the beginning, you thought they were people from screwed up backgrounds who go around destroying cities and lives when they thought they were helping and saving people- but you were so wrong. You see that now. They abandoned their own lives, to help others.

You became close to all of your teammates and they got close to you as well. You lived your everyday life with them, and there was never a dull moment. You’re favorite was when Clint jumped down through the vents in Steve’s face and covered him in silly string and shaving cream, while blowing an airhorn through the tower and took off running. You and everyone else in the room (besides Steve) doubled over in laughter at the sight of Steve covered in white foam and colorful string with a dumbfounded look on his face. Even Bucky laughed. The Bucky that you had never heard laugh before. You liked his laugh.

You didn’t really know him despite the fact that you have been living with him for a few months now. He was closed off and really only talked to Steve, and every once in a while Natasha. You knew a little bit about his past and why he was like that. You knew he didn’t trust himself because of being brainwashed by HYDRA into a mindless killing machine. You knew he regreted what he did everyday- even if he didn’t have control over his actions at the time. You felt bad for him. You didn’t know how it must’ve felt to go through that for years upon years. He didn’t smile or laugh. Ever. So, when you heard him let out a chuckle at the sight of his longtime best friend, you immediately stopped your laughing and looked over at him with an incredulous look of awe on your face.

The loved the sound.

His perfect brown hair was pulled into a bun at the back of his head. His beautiful eyes were sparkling unlike their usual tone of grayness to them. His shiny, white teeth were perfect. It looked like he used to wear braces when he was younger, but in reality- he was just born with perfect teeth. He had brown stubble that covered his chin and adorned his jawline making him look all the more perfect. You were in awe of his beauty when he was happy.

As soon as he realized what was happening though, he stopped laughing and wiped the smile off of his face and replaced it with his usual stone cold appearance.

He looked over at you as soon as he felt your eyes on him and gave you a hard glare as if he was mad at you for seeing him something other than miserable. You stared back at him until he walked out of the room. Nobody else really seemed to notice because the small exchange between the two of you (if you could even call it an exchange) was over in a matter of two seconds.

Your eyes followed him as he left the room. You wanted to see him smile again. Wanted to hear his laughter. You wondered why he didn’t want you to seem him have a good time.

It’s been a couple of weeks since that moment and you still have yet to see Bucky’s hard exterior crack another smile.

~~~

You and the team had just landed from a tough mission. It was another HYDRA base, but this time they had more soldiers there than the team had initially thought. There was only supposed to be about a dozen or so of them, but actually, there was three times as many. It was hard to get in and out and collect the information you needed when HYDRA guards constantly swarmed the base. You and Natasha were supposed to get in, grab as much information as you could and get out before blowing the building and everyone inside it to pieces.

Everyone else was supposed to fight the soldiers and help us get in. We weren’t supposed to even have to fight at all this time around, but we both ended up getting dozens of minor and some more serious injuries from being attacked while gathering the information.

Everyone else had cuts and bruises on them here and there throughout their bodies but you and Natasha had that plus a couple of sprains and bruised and broken ribs that resulted from a grenade being thrown at you. You were both able to shield yourselves for the most part, but the impact from debris came crashing into you both and also the contact with the hard floor wasn’t the most pleasurable you’ve felt in your life.

But you were finally back and after getting bandaged up and some medicine, you were able to finally relax. You went to the living room, that was now empty from the other Avengers hiding out in their rooms for the night. You grabbed a sweatshirt off the back of the couch and threw it on, figuring it was Steve’s. You had a habit of taking his clothes and wearing them. It made you feel protected and it reminded you of the feeling of your older brother’s clothes on you when you were younger.

You went to sit on the couch and threw on a TV show. You were maybe up for a couple of minutes before you crashed on the couch and fell asleep there for the night.

The next morning, when the Avengers came down for breakfast, they saw your resting form on the couch and were quiet so you could continue sleeping peacefully. They knew you suffered from nightmares and they often consisted of your struggles with your past. It wasn’t often you got a nights sleep without waking up in a cold sweat and screaming. So, on the nights you did get decent sleep, they let you be.

It was when Bucky came down for breakfast that the Avengers were thrown off guard. He walked through the entrance into the large kitchen and living room area and stopped when he saw your frame sprawled out across the couch. He looked like he was caught off guard.

“Bucky?” Steve asked while looking at his old friend with a hint of concern in his eyes. “Everything alright?”

He just kept staring at you sleeping. The rest of the team furrowed their eyebrows in concentration trying to figure out what Bucky was getting at. It wasn’t until he pointed his hand towards you and asked, “Is that mine?”

Steve got up from his chair at the table and walked over to you to see what Bucky was talking about. You. You were wearing Bucky’s sweatshirt. Steve let out a soft laugh and put his hand on Bucky’s shoulder.

“She was tired and exhausted from being beat up yesterday. She usually wears my clothes and stuff and she probably thought that sweatshirt was mine.”

“Oh.” Bucky was still looking at you. “Why does she wear your clothes?”

“Because she said they remind her of the feel of her brother.” Steve said, recalling the story you told him about your past.

Bucky didn’t know your backstory, but he could figure out that something bad probably happened to your brother.

Steve continued,”She said her brother used to let her wear his clothes when she needed to feel protected and safe when he wasn’t there.”

Bucky smiled a little at the fact that you felt protected when wearing large clothing. It made him happy knowing that he could give you a little comfort even if it was just his clothes and you thought they were Steve’s.

Steve saw the hint of a smile on Bucky’s face and was shocked that he was okay with it or not saying something along the lines of, “Can you wake her up and give me my sweatshirt back?”

The rest of the team seemed shocked as well. They were expecting him to start complaining about her stealing his stuff because the whole team new about how Bucky didn’t really like the share things.

“Do you want me to get your sweatshirt back for you?” Steve asked his friend.

“What?” Bucky asked coming out of a trance from staring at you. He thought you were beautiful and looked adorable in his clothing. “No, no, no. It’s okay. I can get it back later.”

Steve and the rest of the team had smug smiles on their faces at seeing Bucky smile at you and for him sharing something with you.

Maybe Bucky would come out of his shell at some point.

At least for you.

(Not my gif)

#bucky x reader #bucky imagine #reader insert #avengers imagine #bucky #avengers #avenger imagine #fanfic #fanfiction

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maxrev · 4 years ago

Text

Traditions for Tradition’s Sake

Thank you @nightmarestudio606 for the help with a title, as I was just too happy to write something to think so far ahead lmao

Anyway, have some Niall and Kaidan at Christmastime (a bit late)

“So, where we off to?” Niall asked.

“It’s a surprise,” Kaidan told him.

“I hate surprises.”

Pausing in the act of pouring hot chocolate into two large travel mugs, Kaidan smirked, “Do not. You love surprises.”

With a look worthy of the Grinch himself, Niall huffed in annoyance. “Fine but only when they involve you,” he conceded.

“Good thing this one does then. It means you’re sure to love it.”

Niall slumped against the counter, defeated, and watched Kaidan move around the kitchen in a continuous rhythm, packing a basket full of goodies. Of course, the hot chocolate was not complete without a can of whipped cream for topping and cinnamon to taste. He was also pretty sure he’d seen a flask of whiskey make its way into the basket. When he’d questioned Kaidan, all he’d gotten was ‘something to make them toasty.’ Didnae need whiskey for that.

However, it meant wherever they were going was sure to be cold. Although, snuggling up with Kaidan had many advantages and was worth braving the temperature and snow outside.

He was currently packing small snack bags of pretzels dipped in yogurt and chocolate, frosted Christmas cookies, and Niall’s personal favorite, shortbread. Though the last was only added recently, just for him. Each goodie Kaidan and his mother, Grace, had made by hand, their own little tradition since he’d been a boy. And while he and his mother baked, he’d go out with his father to cut down a Christmas tree, something the three men had done together this year, walking all the way out to the back plot of land which had never been cleared for planting fruit trees and boasted a forest with all different sizes of evergreens.

The Alenko family traditions had now become a part of Niall’s life, though he chose to help only minimally in the kitchen. He’d didn’t mind cooking but baking was too precise and he nearly always messed something up.

He reveled in being part of such a close, loving family and how they celebrated, missing the ones he’d had with his own family, now all gone.

Once the last item made it into the basket, Kaidan stopped, hands on hips, brown eyes checking every inch of the kitchen to make sure he hadn’t missed anything. Walking towards the pantry, his tousled dark head disappeared inside. Niall looked at the basket, thinking it probably weighed more than the St. Bernard, Riley, currently snoozing by the fire.

“You know,” he mused, “if ya keep feedin’ me like this, I’ll be looking like St. Nick verra soon.”

Kaidan emerged from the pantry, a wicked grin on his face. With a wink, he sauntered over to Niall, arms wrapping around his waist as he leaned in close and whispered in his husky voice, warm breath tickling Niall’s lips, “Then I guess I’ll have to sit on your lap and tell you exactly what I want for Christmas.”

Eager to hear more, Niall countered with, “Dinnae keep me waitin’. Tell me now.”

Kaidan chuckled, low and soft. “Don’t worry, I will. But,” he held a finger against his lips, “we have things to do first.”

Much to Niall’s dismay, he turned and hefted the heavily laden basket with ease and walked towards the front door, a smile on his lips as he looked over his shoulder. “Come on, Santa, let’s go. I have a surprise for you.”

“I do love surprises.”

“I thought you didn’t.” Kaidan had stopped by the door to bundle up warmly.

“Changed my mind. Ya did say the surprise involved you.”

“Oh, indeed it does.” Kaidan gave him a heated look before bundling up and headed out the door. If he kept it up, Niall would be shedding layers all the way to -- well, wherever they were headed. With a sigh, he slipped on his boots and gloves, donned his pea coat, and reached for the toque and scarf Grace had knitted just for him in his favorite colors; black, red, and white. An early Christmas present.

He stepped out onto the porch to find a winter wonderland scene straight from a painting; multicolored lights swayed from the eaves in a soft puff of wind. The porch railings were wrapped in the same lights, twinkling merrily, their colors muted, reflecting against the pristine snow. The railings along the porch and steps were wrapped with lights and garland, intertwined.

A large pine tree off to the side of the porch was also wrapped with lights, both multicolored and white. As he closed the door, a thick, beautiful evergreen wreath decorated with assorted Christmas decorations and bells, jingled softly. The foggy windows along the porch were gently lit from within by battery operated candles, shedding amber light out onto the porch.

Hearing a noise, he turned, mouth dropping in an O of surprise. Kaidan stood in front of his parent’s beautiful black Friesian, Warlock, coat glistening in the light of a half moon, whispering to him quietly while one hand played with the forelock. The horse nudged him in the chest, making him stumble, and he laughed in response before pulling a carrot from his pocket. Niall felt green with envy. As the horse happily munched on the carrot, the bells around it’s neck rang in the air.

Behind the horse sat a beautiful sleigh, adorned with intricate designed scrollwork one might find in days gone by. It was a deep red, the designs painted a shimmering gold. The runners waxed and ready to glide effortlessly over the snow. Inside the bench seat was covered in red velvet and piled high with warm woolen blankets and at least a few afghans he was sure Grace had knitted over the years.

Walking down steps cleared of snow, Niall appreciated the sight of Kaidan’s dark head resting against Warlock’s, kindred spirits.

Kaidan looked over as he approached, “Ready for an adventure?”

“Oh, 'tis an adventure yer plannin’? I thought ‘twas a surprise?”

“It’s a surprise adventure.” At Niall’s look of skepticism, he amended, “An adventurous surprise?”

Niall couldn’t help but smile, “With you? Always.”

Leaving the horse, Kaidan walked over to wrap Niall’s scarf snuggly about his neck before tucking it inside his coat.

“What, am I wee lad of five?”

Kaidan tugged on the scarf, before smacking Niall lightly on the shoulder, “Sometimes, though there’s truly nothing wee about you. Now, climb in and let’s get going.”

As soon as he was settled, Kaidan flicked the reigns and called out, “Time to go, Warlock. Let’s show Niall some amazing sights.”

The horse neighed in response and with little effort, pulled them forward and on into the night. As if powered by holiday magic, the sleigh glided effortlessly over the mounds of snow like it was floating along in the air. Niall remained quiet, taking in the peaceful moonlit scened around them. The trees in the orchard, all lined up in rows, and the evergreens scattered haphazardly about, wore their winter coats with refined elegance.

The air was sharp, crisp, and fresh; completely unlike the salty sea air they had living on the beach. It was brisk and cold, clearing Niall’s head from the usual doubts and anxiety which always seemed to follow him around, though less and less as the months went by.

Above them, a dark, velvety canopy was the backdrop for millions of twinkling lights, the stars on gorgeous display as if the whole galaxy was a Christmas tree.

As if no time had passed, Niall realized with a start the sled was slowing to a stop in a small, sheltered alcove amongst the hills, a windbreak of evergreens behind them to keep the chill winter breeze off their skin. Kaidan climbed out and whispered to Warlock while rubbing his neck. Going back to the sleigh, he reached behind the seat and brought out some hay, spreading it out on the ground for the horse.

It was just like Kaidan to always make sure everyone, animal or person, had what they needed.

He climbed back in and reached inside the basket to hand Niall his mug and the flask of whiskey.

“Tryin’ ta get me drunk and take advantage of me?” He dangled the flask in the air. “Take more’n this ta do the trick.”

A dark brow shot up in response, “I need to get you drunk to take advantage of you?”

Without waiting for a response, because they both knew it wasn’t true, Kaidan dug around in the basket and pulled out some of the goodies he’d packed and handed them over. He then shook out several blankets and layered them on their laps before wrapping two of the afghans around their shoulders. A nice, toasty cocoon of warmth.

Niall added a bit of cinnamon to their mugs and Kaidan followed it with a dram of whiskey and topped them with whipped cream. The two sat side by side in this quiet little world, munching contentedly on Christmas snacks and drinking hot chocolate. The whiskey warmed him from the inside out and while it was cold, he wasn’t too uncomfortable. Besides, their body heat warmed him up quite well.

Following a bite of cookie with hot chocolate, Niall swallowed them down and asked, because he was really curious. “So, is there any particular reason we ventured out in weather cold enough to freeze my bollocks into bags of ice? Is this a strange Canadian passtime or something?”

Kaidan nearly choked on his drink, coughing and sputtering with laughter. “Um...no. No, it isn’t. But, there’s actually a very good reason we’re doing this. Just enjoy the surroundings - and the company - and be patient.”

“‘Tis no virtue of mine, patience, as you well know but aye, the company is verra enjoyable.”

Leaning over, Kaidan softly brushed their lips together. “For me too.”

Wherever Kaidan was, Niall wanted to be there. It didn’t matter the circumstances, just as long as they were together. With Kaidan by his side, he could face anything head on.

They sat in the sleigh snuggled side by side, eating, drinking, and talking. Eventually, despite the cold, Niall began to drift off. He was happy, warm, and full; the perfect recipe for a nap.

Kaidan nudged him lightly, “Hey, sleepyhead, wake up.”

Niall blinked open his eyes, “What’d I miss?”

“Well, my stellar company for one.” Niall snorted and Kaidan glanced at him in mock indignation. “Are you saying my company isn’t any good?” As Niall shook his head no, yet didn’t stop laughing, he sighed and crossed his arms. “You also missed the moose who came up and asked for directions.”

Struggling for breath at the statement, mentioned so seriously with no hint of amusement, Niall managed to spit out a retort, “Must’ve been a female. A male wouldn’t ask for directions.”

“Very funny, Niall.”

“Ya know ‘tis true.”

“You didn’t miss anything yet,” Kaidan assured him.

Mouth cracking open in a wide in a yawn, he waited, then asked, “Hey, d’ya have anymore shortbread? Oh, and whiskey. My bollocks really are goin ta freeze off.”

“Those wee things? I doubt it.” Niall glared at him. “So I’m not keeping you warm anymore? That hurts.”

Niall nudged him, “Stop. Ya know I just want more.”

Kaidan chuckled, “Yeah, I do.” He handed the flask over along with a bag of the shortbread, pulling it back when Niall reached for it, eyes narrowing in thought, “Although, you did say you were worried about becoming St. Nick. Maybe you’ve had enough?”

“Well, you dinnae seem upset if I did, so why should I worry? More of me tae love, aye?”

“Ohhhh, aye.” Kaidan eyed him up and down as if he was a popsicle and the weather was dangerously hot. Might end up there at this rate.

He popped a piece of shortbread into his mouth and as he chewed, Kaidan grabbed his hand and squeezed, “There! Look up, Niall.”

Nearly choking on the shortbread, he did and was overcome with awe at the site which greeted him. Across the sky was a giant ribbon of colors in vibrant hues of pink, blue, violet and green. They flowed across the dark sky, lighting it up like a carnival, colors swaying and dancing to the earth’s own music. It was spectacular. Niall felt small in the presence of a wonder such as this.

He watched for several minutes, mesmerized, at the splendor before him. Turning, he saw Kaidan watching him.

“You’re not watchin’ them dance?”

“I’ve seen it a few times and right now, I’m enjoy watching you more. The look of awe and wonder on your face, the colors as they dance across your skin, is much better than watching them in the sky.”

Voice gruff with emotion, Niall pulled him close, “Ach, ya flatterer,” for a kiss which left them both breathless and hungry for more. Very warm as well.

As they watched the light a bit longer before they began to fade, Niall spoke softly, “My da told me about them as a wee lad. Said his da had showed him, told him a story they were our kin, gone up to heaven and paintin’ the sky just for us. I remember I could imagine Gilliana doing such when she...well, maybe ‘tis all of them up there now, paintin’ the sky for me. And you now, as well.”

“What a beautiful thought, Niall. I love it and from what you’ve shared of them, think they would do so, Gilliana spurring them on.”

Turning, he captured Kaidan’s face in his hands, “Tapadh leibh, mo chridhe*,” he whispered softly against his lips.

“You’re welcome. Thank you for coming along and enduring the chilly weather just for me.”

Niall snorted, “Chilly, he says. Aye, I’m happy to be here with ya.”

Grasping the reigns, Kaidan turned Warlock and headed for home, remaining quiet, leaving Niall to this thoughts who knew he would treasure the memory of this night forever.

#mshenko #mass effect #Niall Shepard #Kaidan Alenko #custom shepard #christmastime #holiday fun and stuff

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bastillewolf · 5 years ago

Text

Midnight In Sheffield (III)

Pairing: Alex Turner/Reader

Summary: When a soon-to-be-wedded insomniac author heads back home to visit her parents, she comes across the likes of a mysterious musician whilst on her sleepless escapade in the AM.

Notes: Took a bit longer to edit this chapter, and made it longer. Hope you enjoy!

Let me know if you’d like to be added to the tag list!

@alexbandguy86 @bettyschwallocksyee @fookingsummertime @juicebox-baby@darksydork7 @edgythought @toolateformcrtooearlytoleaveemo

Song recommendation: ‘Bistro Fada’ by Stephane Wrembel

Chapter III - No. 1 Party Anthem

It couldn’t be.

Surely, she hadn’t been that drunk.

If so, she would’ve felt more than embarrassed.

She was standing in the very street she had wandered through the night before, yet nothing seemed familiar. There were no vintage sales, or shops for that matter, or Ford Roadsters that were illuminated by the antique streetlights perched on cobblestone roads.

Instead, she was faced with boring old Sheffield; cracked and bruised asphalt. A few clothing stores and a newspaper office. There was one pub, but not the one she’d been looking for.

“Are you alright? You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Mark said.

“I- Uh, yeah. I could’ve- I could’ve sworn it was here,” she stuttered in response.

“The pub you went to?”

She nodded silently.

“Maybe you went in a different direction. You were tired, happens to the best of us.”

She shot him a look. “I grew up here, Mark. I know my way around this place like the back of my hand, yet that street I went into… I’d never seen it before in my entire life.”

“Hm, strange,” he noted. She knew he was mostly humouring her, and couldn’t shake off the feeling he had been judging her ever since they talked over what happened. It must look crazy, she realized, but to her that was no excuse to not be understanding. He was to be her husband, after all, and weren’t those things most important in a healthy relationship?

“Call me crazy if you want, but I’m telling you; I went to a different pub last night.”

“I know, I believe you.”

She gave a slight sigh of relief.

“Now, come on, let’s go find a restaurant, because we’re not going to that pub on an empty stomach.”

They had searched all over town, with Mark generously tipping the cabby to take them everywhere they wanted. Not necessarily an odd request, but when she started to ask the driver about an old pub with the exact descriptions, - not failing to mention that smoking had been allowed - he gave her a strange look and told her he’d never heard of such a place before.

He must know, as he’d worked as a cabby for ages.

And so, she was currently sat at a random local bar Mark picked out, slumped in her seat, while her fiancée chatted on with Rachel and James. She couldn’t even bring herself to be annoyed with the pair, her mind too clouded to think of anything other than that very clear night.

She touched Mark’s shoulder, and muttered in his ear that she was going back to the hotel.

He nodded, “I’ll text you when I’m coming back. Don’t stay up too late.”

She smiled lightly, and kissed him on the cheek, before slipping out of the door, and leaving the musky scene behind her.

She didn’t really pay attention to where she was going. She was staring down at her feet, which kept their leisure pace on the tiled sidewalk.

She didn’t even bother giving the man in a tracksuit she nearly bumped into a second glance, or the dog that barked at her.

She walked up the few steps, through an alley, until she rounded a corner and was back at what appeared to be the main street. Only then did she actually bump into someone.

“You just keep appearing out of nowhere, don’t you?”

“Miles?”

She rubbed her tired eyes, until the flickering had disappeared, and she could look around again.

A cobblestone street, antique metal streetlights and shop windows filled with antique wear. The man that stood in front of her wore the same suit as yesterday, but without the tie and the top buttons of his shirt undone.

She couldn’t help but throw her arms around his neck in relief.

He huffed in surprise, “Good to see you again too, love. Hope that man of yours hasn’t been treating you poorly again, has he?”

“I’m just relieved to see you again,” she replied, avoiding his question, “I can’t believe I didn’t find this street earlier this afternoon! I went looking all over the place for it! Even asked a cabby, but he didn’t know what I was talking about. I’m so glad I found you.”

A mysterious glint flashed across his eyes. “Look for me, did ya? Worry not, love. You can always find me prancing about in the AM. I’ll most likely still be in bed in the afternoons. Best stay away from me then.”

She snorted as he linked her arm with hers and followed his lead into the pub, missing the way he’d given her a worried glance as she tried to memorize the name of the residence, which was painted in a neat cursive on the sign above it.

Mardy Bum.

“Taken that bird with you again, Miles?” Alex asked from his seat at the wooden table, his foot sliding a chair out for each of them from underneath the table.

“Couldn’t help myself, Al. I just keep running into her. It’s like fate.”

“Call it fate or whatever you want, mate, but there’s no hiding you’ve always fancied the married girls.”

“Sorry, could you repeat that for me?” Miles held a hand to his ear facetiously. “I couldn’t hear you over the tune of ‘The Bad Thing’.”

Alex rolled his eyes. “Are you playing cards with us, or what?”

Miles looked back at her, waiting for her answer. She shrugged, “As long as it’s not strip poker.”

“Shame,” one of the other men at the table muttered, who she recognized from the previous night as Alex’s drummer.

“This is Matt, by the way,” Miles pointed at him, before turning to the other two band members. “And that’s Jamie, and Nick. You remember them from yesterday, no?”

“Of course, you put up a great show.”

“Flattery won’t get you anywhere in a game of cards, love,” Matt teased, as he shuffled the deck of cards like he’d do every evening.

And so, the night went on, filled with light and pleasant conversation, and a few more antsy rounds of cards. The beer gradually switched to something stronger, which she identified as a very fine whiskey. Not wanting to think about their tab yet which was bound to arrive at the end of the night, she enjoyed the smooth liquid burning her throat, and beat Jamie once again at his own game.

“I don’t like her,” he grumbled.

“Don’t be petty, Jamie. It’s not her fault you’re shit at cards,” Matt said.

“I’m not shit! I won last time!”

“Last time we let you win because it was your birthday,” Alex smoothly chimed in.

“What?!”

Matt burst out laughing at the guitarist’s aghast facial expression, and she noted even Alex himself smirked along with the merriment. She had only known him for two evenings, but from the lack of lines around his mouth, he didn’t seem like he smiled often, so it was nice to be graced with one.

What she did want to be able to unsee was the way he kept looking at her over the deck in his hands with those dark brown eyes. It made her squirm a bit in her seat.

“So, if we asked you to write an autobiography on the band, would you do it?” Nick asked. She’d told them about her career path, and how she hadn’t been able to write anything for a long while.

“I mean, if that’s what you’d want.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Matt quickly intervened.

“Well, why not?”

“She’d never believe us,” Alex drawled.

She met his eyes once more, and they looked awfully calm.

“No offence, but unless you’re going to tell me you go to Hogwarts and practice magic, I’m afraid you can’t say much that makes me find the story of a band who plays in pubs unrealistic.”

“A band who plays in pubs?! You must be joking,” the bartender suddenly intervened, setting the glass down which he had been drying with a towel for the past half hour. “They’re the most famous band in England! Even have their records played in America, they do. I’m lucky they still play in here, or it wouldn’t be so packed every Friday night.”

“We’d never abandon this place, John. This is where we became men and had our first beverages as adults,” Jamie said, raising his glass.

“Don’t play the fool with me, Jamie. You’d had too many pints before you got drunk to be a first-time drinker, and I’ve seen you sneak through the back when you were younger.”

“I didn’t know there was a certain age you’re supposed to be,” Alex quipped.

“Cause nobody told me!” Miles suddenly shouted, rising from his chair and humming a tune to himself as he cradled his drink closer to his chest.

“For the last time, Miles, if you’re going to dance, please find yourself a partner that isn’t the alcohol.”

The man in question pursed his lips thoughtfully at Alex. “Great idea, mate. I’m gunna take a piss and when I get back, I’ll have found my partner.”

He stumbled off in the direction of the restroom, and the group shared a look, for the hour was growing late and they were the only ones left in the pub.

“Sorry about Miles. He gets awfully vague when he’s drunk,” Nick told her.

She smiled. “Don’t worry about it, I’m having a laugh. I wish I could spend the whole night here. Haven’t had this much fun in a while.”

She noticed Matt trying to subtly glance down at his watch, which was close to striking 3 AM. “Probably not the best idea, love. I think it’s time to go home.”

Alex gave him a look. “Why? She could stay a bit longer, wouldn’t hurt anyone,” he slurred.

“You know why.”

“My fair lady!”

Their heads turned towards the back of the bar, where Miles had gotten down on one knee in front of a mop perched in a dirty bucket. “Please, grace me with a dance.”

The silence that followed seemed to be the cue for Miles to think the mop had accepted his offer, and for Matt to definitely call it a night.

Nick and Jamie helped Miles across the street – after managing to pry the ‘fair lady’ from his arms – while Matt chatted away with John as he was closing the bar, and she was suddenly left alone with the singer himself.

“May I walk you home?” He asked her. “No funny business, I promise.” Though he’d held his hands up in surrender, the action was contradicted by the mischievous glint in his orbs.

“Sure,” she replied, and a very small part of her wished she had just said ‘no’.

“So, since you’re famous and all,” she started, her gaze trained upon the way her feet carefully stepped on the individual stones cemented into the street’s dirt. “Have I heard any of your songs before? What were you guys called again?”

“I don’t think you would have. And we’re called the Arctic Monkeys.”

She raised her brow, the name sounding vaguely familiar.

“Stupid name, I know.”

“No,” she quickly said, “Not at all, actually. It’s somehow… Very fitting.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.”

She smiled at him, until her eyes turned up to the sky, which was filled with flickering lights in the darkest of blues. “It’s a beautiful night, isn’t it?”

He hummed. “You must not be one to stay up late often, then. It’s beautiful, sure. But not the best sight I’ve ever seen.”

“What is the best sight you’ve ever seen?”

He studied her for a moment, and couldn’t tell if he was deciding on whether to answer her or not, or thinking of long-lost memories. “France. On the countryside. I’ve been all around the world, but that one night – probably caused by the empty bottles of tequila, might I add – was incomparable. Starry, with a really thin crescent moon in the sky, which Jamie described as ‘the moon’s side boob’. I thought that was quite profound. So, I wrote it down. Might even slip it into a song one day.”

The corners of her lips quirked up mischievously, the tingling sensation of the alcohol running through her system finally catching up with her. “Sing me a song, Alex.”

“A song?”

“Yesss,” she pleaded.

“Not sure your husband would agree with that.”

“He’s out and about with Mark and Rachel. Said he’d text me if he’d get back. I think we’ve got time.”

There was a quiver in his stride. “A text, you say?”

She nodded absentmindedly. “Anyways, he’s not my husband, so being serenaded isn’t illegal just yet.”

He let out a chuckle, but it was short-lived. “Could you humour me for a bit?”

“Uh, sure.”

“Could you tell me who’s the ruler of England right now?”

“What?”

“Just- Just answer the question, please.”

“The… the queen.”

“Ah.”

“I didn’t get that wrong, did I? I’m quite plastered, I’m afraid.”

“No, not at all. Perhaps we do have to save that serenade for another night, though.”

They’d halted, but the building in front of them was not one she recognized, and the route they’d taken too short to have been able to get to the hotel. “I don’t think this is-“

He kissed her on the cheek, more gently than she would’ve expected, which left her hanging with her mouth slightly open, numb from sudden surprise.

“Have a good night, love.”

He spared her one last glance, until he turned, and walked back through the dark and deserted street.

She sort of stumbled through the doors, and her eyes widened at the sight, for she was back in her hotel, and when she looked outside, she no longer met with the cobblestone street, but only the cracked asphalt of New Sheffield.

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wingedwalls · 4 years ago

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Teen Wolf Season 1 from Derek’s POV

So I actually think Derek’s character is very consistently written, and that seasons 1 and 2 are examples of excellent writing (I know, shocker of an unpopular opinion around here 😂). I've been thinking about Derek's portrayal, and what the story looks like from his perspective, and it's like a different show altogether, so I thought I'd share.

Let’s take a moment to think about The Story So Far, from Derek’s POV:

• Derek was an arrogant jock brought up in a loving but very large family (ie used to a certain level of independence, and who would need to really act up for any adult other than Uncle Peter to pay attention and get involved).

• Not going to go into the Paige thing at this point, in case anyone reading this has only seen season 1.

• Falls for Kate, who takes advantage of him and eventually burns down his house, with all of his family in it except one of his sisters. Comes back from school to find his home burnt down, his family dead, and puts two and two together in his mind. What would young Derek have learned from that? A few things: don’t trust people, ever. It makes you too vulnerable. Don’t let people in, it puts you and yours in literal danger. It’s All His Fault and he basically killed his family. And - Seduction is power.

• Moves to New York and tries to get over this trauma. Probably doesn’t get very far, since the number one lesson he learned in his life is Don’t Let People In. He becomes a very angry person.

• Eventually Laura tells him she’s off to Beacon Hills to investigate. This is probably not something that came out of the blue, rather she was probably investigating the cause of the fire as a way of coping with her grief. Not only does Derek not have that, he had to spend 6 years watching her do that, knowing that he was responsible for their deaths (in his mind), and not being able to say anything. Either she wouldn’t figure it out, and he would feel guilty forever, or she would, and she would hate him forever. He lived with this eating him up for 6 years. Then off to Beacon Hills she goes, saying she’s close to figuring something out, but not telling Derek why.

• Then she goes radio silent. Derek has no reason to equate this radio silence with anything other than “she found out it was me, and now she hates me.” But Laura is literally all he has. So he goes to Beacon Hill the next morning, to try and explain. Instead, he finds half of her dead body in the woods. That’s the dead body of the last person who ever cared about him. (Not counting Peter - because while Derek cares for Peter, who was arguably his closest family member before the fire, he doesn’t expect him to ever recover). Laura is dead, and it’s probably hunters, and the only way to not let guilt and grief take over is to focus on his anger. He takes Laura back to the burnt out husk of his family home, and buries her under the family symbol for revenge.

• Literally within a few hours of him finding Laura’s body, two people come sniffing around the exact scene of the crime. He goes to check it out - it’s clear they’ve been here before (he found the inhaler) but it’s also clear they’re not hunters. They’re useless teenagers. One of them smells like a wolf. He tells them to fuck off.

• These two kids might not have been hunters, but there’s something weird going on with them. So he stalks them to try and find out what’s going on.

• Turns out this Scott kid was newly bitten. There’s something else going on here - an alpha who isn’t Laura. He’s apparently turning people, making new wolves. Is this a good thing or a bad thing? He’s not sure.

• But things are getting more complicated - the Argents are back. Not Kate, no, thank god, but her brother and his kid. And Scott is making all of the same mistakes he used to make - he needs to stop this before it all blows up in his face.

• Before he gets a chance to get his mind around any of this, let alone mourn the loss of his sister whose body he just discovered a couple of days ago, shit hits the fan and those asshole teenagers GET HIM ARRESTED FOR LAURA’S MURDER. That’s what he gets for not being distrustful enough of people. These idiots are going around like they know everything, when it’s clear they know NOTHING. He tells them exactly that.

• There’s not enough evidence, and so after this utterly humiliating experience, they let him go. Despite this, nobody doubts for a second that Derek is guilty.

• The one saving grace in this situation is that the Argents don’t know he’s here. But Scott is still making all the same mistakes Derek made in the past. And so Derek, who hasn’t had a single friend in literal YEARS, is poorly socialised, and has only ever had the great example of Peter as a mentor, actually tries to take Scott under his wing. He really, really *tries*. He just sucks at it.

• Scratch that, the Argents know he’s here, and they know who he is. He was just minding his own business at the service station when Argent tried to intimidate him and smashed up his car.

• This rogue alpha situation is becoming a problem, so Derek begins to go out at night and look for him.

• One such night he’s out tracking the alpha, there’s a commotion. The alpha attacks a car. As Derek moves to get closer, he gets shot in the leg. Uh oh. Hopefully it’ll heal. He slinks back to the preserve and his burnt out husk of a house.

• Well, shit. It was a Wolfsbane bullet. It’s not healing. That is NOT good. He needs help, or he’s going to die.

• Derek has not asked for help in a very long time. Not as a teenager, when it would’ve made him look weak, and not since the fire, because he literally doesn’t trust anyone enough to help. But this time he’s completely alone. And if he doesn’t get help, he’s going to die. SCOTT. Scott can help. He’s been helping Scott, so Scott owes him. He’s an idiot, but desperate times call for desperate measures. Scott needs his help, so Scott needs him alive, so Scott will help.

• Scott doesn’t care. Derek makes him to the school, barely conscious, and asks Scott’s peer - Jackson - where he is. That asshole won’t even tell him. He tries to carry on but pretty much passes out in the corridor. He’s literally on the brink of death in a building full of people, and is actively asking for help, and NOBODY CARES. NOBODY even STOPS.

• Eventually he makes it out, finds Scott and his friend, and they tell him to fuck off. Seriously?! He passes out again. Scott is like “Stiles, you deal with him, I don’t have time for this shit.” And leaves. They keep joking about letting him die.

• For all the nasty comments, that kid driving the jeep is the only one who actually hasn’t left him to die. Scratch that, he wants to dump him at his house and ditch him. His house with no locks where everyone who wants him dead knows to find him. Derek starts to panic.

• Derek has hours left to live and nobody is helping. Even though he has made it simple for them and told them exactly how to help. Scott, the one person he thought might care, is literally taking his time having dinner with his abusers’ daughter instead of doing the one thing that can save his life. Fuck it, he’s just going to cut off his own arm.

• Scott makes it back with the bullet in the nick of time. Fuck people.

• To add insult to injury, Derek has a run in with Chris at the service station and he smashes up his car.

• Derek is back at home, minding his own business, when the literal worst thing that could possibly happen happens. KATE ARGENT shows up in his home. The last time she was here, she was burning his family alive. She shows up with guns, incapacitates him, taunts him about his dead sister, his dead family, tries to pump him for information, and when none is forthcoming and it becomes clear he’s “outlived his usefulness” - she tries to kill him.

• Derek runs. The house isn’t safe anymore.

• Derek still tries. He tries to make an ally out of Scott. He’s the only non-psychopathic werewolf left in Beacon Hills. Derek has no pack, no one. They’re stronger and safer together. If only he would stop being such an idiot.

• His search for the alpha points to Deaton. The guy clearly knows things. Things about him. He is not forthcoming with information. Derek has no time for this shit. He roughs him up a bit. Unfortunately, Scott picks that night to come up with the stupidest plan EVER and apparently decides to broadcast his existence to all of Beacon Hills. Aaand then he gets mauled by the alpha.

• To add insult to injury, when he comes to Derek finds out that Scott has thrown him under the bus by telling the fucking sheriff that he, Derek Hale, trapped a bunch of kids at the school, kept them hostage, and killed a man. Great. Now all of beacon hills wants him dead. Back to being on the run. It’s not like his home is a safe place to stay anyway.

• He needs help, but the last time he asked for help that didn’t go so well. Scott didn’t give a shit. A building full of people left him for dead in the corridors and no one stopped. He passed out on the road and the only reaction people showed was annoyance at stopping the traffic. Actually, you know who did help? That Stiles kid. He’s probably Derek’s best bet if he needs a safe place to crash.

• Stiles has a lead - he can hear them talking about it. That other guy doesn’t want to help. Apparently Stiles is the king of brilliant ideas, and an improvised strip tease is exactly what it takes for that Danny guy to help them. (Again, what did Derek learn? Seduction is power.)

• Things are not looking good. Their one lead seems to point to... Scott’s mother? They need to think about this.

• If the hunters didn’t kill Laura... then the alpha did. An alpha more powerful than Laura? Derek doesn’t want to let the hope bloom in his chest, but maybe another one from his family got out? Survived the fire? But then why aren’t they coming for him? Why Scott?

• They need to talk to Peter. Surprisingly, Stiles appears to have a decent sense of priorities and skips his Lacrosse game to help with this.

• Bad news. Peter is the alpha. Uncle Peter. Uncle Peter has recovered?! What?! And now he’s killing people?! He killed Laura?! He attacked him?! Act now, think later. That Stiles kid is in danger, he needs to get him out of harm’s way first.

• After a fight, Derek and Peter have a heart to heart. This is huge. Derek isn’t alone in the world after all. He *does* have family. He wasn’t in control before. He was angry. Derek can understand that. Maybe things can be okay after all... they need to talk to Scott.

• They go to the school, and Peter does something Derek didn’t know was possible. He sticks his claws in Scott’s neck as a way of sharing memories. Well, shit. This reminds Derek of something, but he can’t quite figure out what.

• He feels a bit more powerful now. A bit safer, knowing he’s got someone else on his side. He can go back to the Hale house.

• Scott is at Derek’s house when the hunters attack. This is bad. They’re probably going to take him - he barely got away last time. But he can’t let them get to Scott. He has to protect Scott. So he buys him time. As a last-minute decision, he takes Scott’s phone. Hopefully someone can figure it out. Use it to track him. That Stiles kid is pretty smart. Maybe he can figure it out.

• Derek is held prisoner and tortured by Kate. On his own property. I don’t think I need to go over this - what you see is what you get. Kate shows him off to Allison like he’s some circus animal, and Allison barely reacts with anything but fear. She voices all the guilt and self-loathing and resentment he’s kept to himself for 6 years. He gets physically and emotionally tortured. For days. In his own basement.

• Derek only got caught because he was buying Scott some time to get away. When he hears Scott’s howl he thinks maybe he might have a chance of getting away after all. Except then Scott shows up and refuses to help him out. Derek is seriously freaking out. Kate could be back at any point. They can talk about this later, but he needs to leave NOW.

• Eventually Derek breaks himself out, fuelled by the mix of relief and panic that came with Scott’s appearance. Wait, Scott might actually be saying something important. Now that he’s free he can pay attention. Shit, Scott might be right. Peter didn’t lose control and kill Laura in a moment of confusion. He lured her here. It was premeditated murder. Peter MURDERED his sister.

• Barely does he make it back to the house before Allison and Kate show up to kill him and Scott. Scott won’t listen to him, won’t listen to any of his advice. Kate shoots him. Everyone there leaves him for dead. And this is the sad thing - if Derek did die, right here right now, no one would mourn him. No one would miss him. No one. At all. He’s completely alone.

• By the time he comes to, Stiles and Jackson are on the scene and Peter is being burned alive. Again. It’s a horrible sight, but this time the thought of Peter murdering his only family left alive is worse. Derek wants revenge. Scott asks him to let him do it. But fuck Scott. He’s spent weeks trying to help him, WEEKS, and for what? To die alone in a ditch, with all of Beacon Hills wanting him dead. He wants revenge, yes. But what he needs right now, also, more than anything, is a pack. He needs to not be alone. And so he needs to be the alpha. He kills Peter.

I find it interesting when people say that Derek is intended to be the villain or the antagonist in this season, because to me that really isn't the case. He's more of a red herring than anything. Scott may see him as a threat, but if you actually look at things from his perspective, he actually goes OUT OF HIS WAY to help Scott and Stiles, over and over again, and gets nothing but shit for it.

#teen wolf #derek hale #reposted from my own reddit #teenwolfmusings #scott mccall #stiles stilinski #derek hale pov

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