#nichole daniels headcanons

[noirvette]

stan, kyle, clyde, and nichole! + band headcanons!!

these are just basic headcanons to go along with we never existed but can be read by itself as well

speaking of we never existed, first official update will be on saturday at 12:00 CT!!

cws: none! Aged up characters

♡ STAN MARSH

Main singer

Does most of the writing for songs (with Nichole)

Band genre is alternative / indie rock? / pop rock / rock (Think like IDKHOW, Joywave, Arctic Monkeys, Nirvana, etc.)

They aren't signed to any major record label (just a small one) and they'd be considered indie because of that but either way

Can play the piano (shoutout trey parker rq) but considering he never gets the chance to really play it, he kinda forgets it's something he can do LOL

He also knows the drums considering he knows how to play piano

Does a lot of the mixing and arrangement of the instrumentals and vocals. Is also a huge perfectionist on this, if something doesn't sound right he gets annoyed

Kyle is backup vocals for certain tracks, and if Stan thinks Kyle didn't sing a note correctly (or rather he knows), he makes Kyle re sing the verse LMAO

Is proud of his music and wants things to be perfect

Will stay up until 4am on writing lyrics. He's not a coffee drinker in my opinion so how he manages to stay up is a mystery (the 6 energy drinks behind him is how)

I feel like, he sounds sort've like a mix of Mitchel Cave (main singer of Chase Atlantic), and Riovaz.

His inspirational genres for his music would be pop rock, indie/alternative rock, and death metal (not too often, but throwin this curve ball in here since.. he DID form a death metal band in s23)

However he does like non rock genres like r&b and alternative pop, only because Kyle tends to listen to those genres a lot and it's rubbed off on him (and the genres are a vibe).

Taught Clyde the drums since freshman year of high school (I'll mention this more later on in Clyde's part)

Has perfect pitch, idk it seems like.. so like Stan to just casually have perfect pitch

♡ KYLE BROFLOVSKI

Manager

He was actually the one who brought up the idea of a band (hence him being the manager), only because he was bored and figured "hey.. a small local band might be kinda fun to do!" and then the band got popular and now hes like "wtf"

Now despite Kyle looking more like he'd be a tenor, he's got a baritone singing voice (basing this off the fact he was the bass in s21 ep5)

Can actually play a few instruments (shout out matt stone rq), i.e guitar (both electric and acoustic) and the drums (he seems like a band kid percussionist too anyways)

He didn't want to play instruments in the band though and would rather not be in the limelight.

However he is attributed in a few songs because a) backup vocals, b) is a backup guitarist c) has been the stand in drummer when Clyde is sick.

Is a fan of alternative rock, alternative/indie pop, r&b, and occasionally rap (he's a fan of lil uzi i just know it)

Helps Stan with writing song lyrics, but can't write lyrics for shit so he just summarizes his thoughts and gives it to Stan so he can write lyrics out of it

Is a wonderful manager actually, keeps the band booked and busy.

Is lowkey the errand boy HAHA (poor Kyle)

Not kidding, if something needs to be replaced, Kyle's on it. If they need a gig soon, Kyle's on it. If someone's sick (CLYDE.), Kyle's on it. If they need a few touring members, Kyle's on it. The band seriously would not function properly if Kyle wasn't there to help them with it all (he reminds them CONSTANTLY of this)

Knows the band's dynamics the best, if someone starts getting agitated with someone else, Kyle's helping mediate the entire situation.

Helped with teaching Clyde the drums w/ Stan

♡ CLYDE DONOVAN

Drummer

Learnt drums through out high school from Stan and Kyle because he thought he'd impress people and get dates easier LMFAOO

When Kyle thought of the band idea in their last year of high school, Clyde immediately wanted to join (and hey he knows drums so yeah it works)

Gets overly excited during practices and causes a lot of accidents that it's gotten to the point where Kyle has a "___ days since Clyde caused any incidents", it's at zero.

Likes watching Stan do the mixing and wants to learn but would rather eat his own foot than ask Stan to show him how.

Helped out Kyle with managing the band at the beginning that it caused some in team confusion on whether or not they should switch roles

Doesn't use the fact he's in a band to impress people he's attracted to anymore because the band's popularity grew.

He does interact with his fans the most though, often hosting instagram lives or he's the longest to stay out on stage to talk to the fans before they end a show.

He loves meeting fans of him or the band out in the street and is never mad about being asked to take pictures or get an autograph. Easily the most approachable one of the band

He's actually really grateful to the band and to the fans but finds himself unable to fully express it into words.

Likes to show off his skills when Stan calls out introductions of the band during their songs at concerts(idk some band concerts ive been to stall the instrumental part between the chorus and the verses to do introductions ? do you guys know what i mean 😭)

Gets his fans to attack Craig and Tolkien sometimes, like he'll joke around on twitter with the two of them a lot just to be like "guys don't be mean to me wtf" and his fans come to his aid all the time.

♡ NICHOLE DANIELS

Electric guitarist

Kyle knew she played the guitar from band days together. (Jazz band..)

So he took a shot and asked if she wanted to join their band and she agreed!!

Is the second easily approachable member of the band and is always so excited to meet fans and talk to them.

Has played guitar for so long that she can manage to do the guitar talking rifts (Like the segment of the talking guitar in Yankee Rose) and does it to talk to the fans sometimes

Loves writing song lyrics so she sits together with Stan a lot so they can figure out albums, eps, and singles together.

Some songs are solely written by her too.

They both rarely get into writers block because they constantly bounce ideas off each other

They like story telling through their songs, so the albums often have a small story line to them.

Also provides a small backup vocal segments in certain songs, but isn't a fan of singing (in front of a lot of people at least). She's gotten more confident but would rather let Stan and or Kyle handle the vocals

Likes stage decor and setting up what goes where. Kyle lets her manage that part of his job (the whole stage designing thing) and she's super good at it too. The stage at concerts are always set up beautifully.

Has three electric guitars that she switches out through out the course of concerts, a chrome iridescent one (which happens to be her main choice), a white pale green one, and a dark sage green one.

She also has a red heart shaped electric guitar but considering it's awkward to hold she doesn't play it that often.

Also has a ukulele. Brings it with her to concerts to do a small ukulele section.

[s0uth3park]

Random SP headcanons pt2

Pt 1

Tweek tried to, but ultimately will never, learn how to drive with heavy advice from his loved ones (Craig). It’s too stressful. It’s dangerous because of his anxiety and tics for others and himself. No driving for Tweek. Please.

Cartman doesn’t make fun of Craig for being “half ginger” because he’s a little scared of him… kind of.

Speaking of, Cartman showed Craig his own wiener (as per TxC) of his own volition.

Fat fucking crush on Kyle btw.

If Stan hates that he looks like his dad then he hates that Kyle looks like his mom btw. Because… alcoholic x radical canadaphobe?? Fuck knows.

Stan shakes on weed (no projection here). He can’t feel it though.

Speaking of, Tweek can’t feel his own shaking.

Cartman wishes that Kenny would act how he would / seeks Kenny’s validation, hence his criticism of Kenny of the most menial of things (ie. holding a candle in Put It Down).

If there was money for it, Karen would own a lot of stuffed animals.

Kevin and Karen do not carry the gene for red hair. Or blond/blonde hair.

Cartman loves his fucking grandma. (No projection I swear)

Jimbo holds some affection for Liane but is just a gay old fuck. Jimned 4eva

Did I mention in my last post I think, despite Mrs Valmer’s canon design, that Mrs Tweak has the biggest tits? I’m saying it again if so

SHE AND RICHARD SCREW SO BAD I KNOW I SAID BUT PLEASE UNDERSTAND–

I know I said last post that I didn’t know how Tweek and Butters would be cousins but now I’ve decided… people can think differently because anything goes but for me it’s through both fathers. Tweak Bros. originates from Mrs. Tweak’s father and to earn the right to marry her he had to win him over and show his dedication to the profession

Richard and Stephen got grounded a LOT

Linda and Sheila’s hair always smells incredible (so much product)

Sheila is the type of grandma to give out stale sweeties

The Marsh name ends with Stanley. The bloodline ends with both him and Shelley

Heidi is the mother of Kyle’s kids (coping)

Cartman only became homeless after his mother died

He never worked ever (garageman future aside)

Clyde got vaccinated guys we can all rest now (the bad future self came back to tell him to never do it but once the good future is put into play he gets vaccinated because there was no bad future to come back to tell him)

Clyde is very girldad coded, soz

Bebe’s dad is a bit younger than her mom (he is the ultimate girldad… Mr. Stevens I wish I knew your name)

Clyde gets more insecure about his weight / appearance as he gets older. For now he is young however so let him live (his pudge is the pudge ever and he is sonboy if not a carnal dream and a half… latter only in pcov ofc)

Mr. Stevens helps Bebe with her homework a fuckton (particularly maths)

Butters bites his nails

Butters (after growing up) loves strong women. Look at his Pcov design and tell me he doesn’t want / have / respect a buff wife.

If Butters wasn’t grounded as much as a kid he wouldn’t have a fear of expectations as much as he does, meaning he would have probably gotten a better job than working in Dennybees or whatever it was called. Bro could have been a multi billionaire girlboss

I just want someone to hear this it’s not really a headcanon but BHLK Queen Thistle? LINDA STOTCH? Same character different nationalities istg

Kyle plays chaperone a fair bit to the guys

Kyle, Tolkien and Craig are the most sensible drivers out of All The Boys (Tolkien behind Craig and Kyle if I’m being honest)

Kenny and Bebe (Bebe isn’t a boy but YKWIM) are the fucking fastest / most reckless

Clyde and Stan are sort of not great but not bad drivers

Jimmy is rather close to Tolkien in terms of driving skill yk

Butters, Cartman, Tweek don’t drive – Cartman out of laziness / expectation of chaperones, and Butters and Tweek out of stress… Tweek tried to learn though

Craig in later years drives Tweek everywhere

Tweek and Cartman have experienced heart attacks (in later years) but for different reasons to the other. Clyde has come very close. So has Craig, though not as close.

Tweek dies before Craig.

Stan dies before Kyle.

Butters dies before Kenny (ironically).

Craig visits Tweek’s grave with flowers every week??

Craig, as an old man, wears a lot of fucking cardigans. Grandpa shirts too (the things without the collars).

Tweek and Craig have matching anythings. Typically slippers.

Bebe is very handsy and sometimes possessive. Clyde thinks it’s “sweet”. (The dudebro sweet not the romantic sweet through the possessiveness originates from romanticism).

In Pcov Clyde is a delivery man, actually

Out of all the couples, it would always be Clybe to cause the most hickeys

Bebe has a flatter ass than brilliant boobs (opposite for Wendy, though Wendy isn’t flat chested)

Nichole bleaches her skin in the future (it’s sad but look at her design. Out of everything else it’s the most unrecognisable and it’s awful) (ETA: when I say awful I’m talking about why most people bleach their skin and how it can affect one’s health – people can do as they please but ultimately skin bleaching isn’t a… great??? thing, socially and health-wise)

Nichole loves 60s/70s paraphernalia and fashion (the ultimate flower power child)

Wendy and Cartman fuck at least once in their lifetimes. They take it to the grave, but because of this Cartman doesn’t die a fucking virgin

That sounds so damn harsh wth but it’s true (I think Cartman doesn’t really have any labels moreso is just attached to certain people when it’s not just himself *cough cough* Kyle and Wendy *cough cough*)

Jimmy can see perfectly fine out of both eyes until he reaches teenhood

Jimmy has two brown haired alleles

Cartman doesn’t make fun of Kenny or Craig for having a ginger / red haired parent because he thinks they’re pretty cool. He lowkey ships them / wants to be them.

Cartman has the gene for ginger hair.

[hunnysnoops]

˗ˋ𝕎𝕙𝕚𝕥𝕖 𝕋𝕖𝕖𝕥𝕙 𝕋𝕖𝕖𝕟𝕤ˊ˗

Chapter Twelve: Slip of the Tongue

Kyle Broflovski x fem reader

You make me feel like I've done wrong. Slip of the tongue. I've taken it back, what's done is done.

Also available on Ao3 and Wattpad!

Premise: After running for years, your legs finally give out.

Warnings: Blood / crude language and humour

MASTERLIST

.˙꩜°˖:*࿔ ☼ ࿔*:˖°꩜˙.

You've been avoiding Kyle ever since that almost kiss. The memory of that moment hangs in your mind like the smell of rain after a storm, making you feel awkward and unsure every time you think about it. Right now, you're pacing around your bedroom, trying to focus on anything but him. The soft hum of your computer and the comforting clutter of your room usually help, but today, they don't.

You walk back and forth, your feet hitting the hardwood floor with each step. You had skipped dinner to eat at your desk to scroll online forums and try to figure out what to do. Every time your family went to visit the Broflovskis, you would fake an illness to avoid the thing you dreaded most. 

It didn't help that summer would be drawing to a close and the days until school started were cutting down. The whole thing made you nervous. You had blocked him on everything the moment your phone had service again.

It wasn't Kyle himself that made your stomach churn, the thought of being vulnerable almost caved your head in. 

The posters on your walls seem to mock you with their silent, unchanging presence. You run your fingers through your hair, your mind replaying that day over and over. The way he leaned in, the way your heart pounded, and the way you pulled back at the last second. It's all too much.

Usually, you weren't one to be this fragile but walking circles in your bedroom, you cradled yourself like a glass statue. It was like you might shatter at the thought of being honest.

You hoped that you cranked your music up loud enough that no one in the house could hear you frantically pacing. You were sure the inside of your mouth was mangled from the amount you had been chewing on your cheek for the past week and a half. 

It was clear you weren't good at processing your emotions, it wasn't a skill you ever learned growing up and now you suffered greatly for it. You were so aware of everything but didn't know how to put your thoughts into words like they were knotted and caught in your throat. 

The last guy you dated ended horrifically in tenth grade, due to your lack of being able to articulate feelings; Jason had been crying on the edge of his bed and you stood awkwardly watching him like he was a zoo animal. You almost wanted to scream in your blue and white striped boxer shorts and the very T-shirt you got when you went to the concert with Kyle.

The heat outside was almost insufferable and creeping its way into your bedroom since your dad refused to turn on the AC and duct taped the thermostat so neither you or your brother would raise the bill hence the very mismatched outfit you were wearing. Bebe's cherry-patterned scrunchie was still on your wrist from the late-night fast food drive you endured the night prior.

The way he leaned in, the way your heart pounded, and the way you ducked down at the last second. It's all too much. You like Kyle, really like him, but the thought of being vulnerable and what a relationship might do to your family terrifies you. All you needed was the rest of the summer to make up your mind. 

Suddenly, your dad's voice breaks through your thoughts and the loud music that was almost blowing out your eardrums, calls up the stairs. "Jellybean, Kyle's here for you!"

Panic sets in, like ice water coursing through your veins. Your heart races, and you feel a lump in your throat. The last thing you want is to face him now. You glance around your room frantically, your eyes landing on the open window. Without a second thought, you scramble to your feet and head for it.

Your hands tremble as you push the window open wider, the warm breeze hitting your face. You lean out, gauging the drop to the ground. It's a long fall, but the hedge below looks like it might cushion you. You swing one leg over the sill, feeling the rough edge of the window frame against your thigh. Your breath quickens as you pull the other leg over, now perched precariously on the edge.

For a moment, you hesitate, looking back into the familiar comfort of your room. Your feet find purchase on the small ledge below, and you inch your way down, body pressed close to the house. Your hands scramble for the drain pipe immediately. You weren't close to the ground but you were once again wild and desperate. 

Shuffling along the edge, you see your neighbour pause where he mows his lawn to watch you. You force a smile and wave to him like this is an everyday activity. You can hear thumps sounding upstairs by your room, Kyle's car is parked out front, your own is stuck behind your mother's and without waiting another beat you grab the drain pipe with your other hand as well to keep you steady as you awkwardly slide down. 

You thought for a moment that the pipe might rip from the house and send you spiralling to the ground but between the chance of falling to the lawn or getting caught in this act, you chose the former. 

You land with a soft thud, the hedge rustling beneath you. The impact sends a jolt through your body, but you barely notice. Quickly, you crawl out of the hedge, branches scratching your arms, and crouch behind it, your heart pounding in your ears. You listen intently, waiting to see if Kyle or your dad will come looking for you. You can hear a knock on your bedroom door until it inevitably creaks open. 

Knowing you can't stay here, you gather your courage and glance around to make sure no one has seen you. You slip through the side yard, the grass damp under your feet, and break into a run. Your neighbour still watches you, his wife joining him on the lawn where they try to decode exactly what you're doing. The world seems to narrow down to the sound of your rapid breaths and the pounding of your feet against the pavement.

In the moment you weren't sure where you were headed and began to think of all those who live close to you- Wendy. You knew she was home, she sent you a picture of her cat only minutes before your grand escape. 

Growing up you were always told the best way to win a fight is to not be in one, this felt similar. You knew that no matter what this would end up in an argument with Kyle but not if you were able to outrun it until it simmered out like none of it happened at all.

The pavement was undoubtedly cutting your feet, maybe you should've thought ahead and kept a pair of shoes in your room for situations like this, albeit not very common. You had more adrenaline in your veins than when you had faced life or death at the paws of a raccoon.

As you run, you wish for nothing more than a cigarette, just something to take the edge off so you aren't shaking with nerves. You thought about what Kyle would do or what he had done when he was that you had disappeared from your bedroom. What would your dad do? Probably assume that you had left hours before and he didn't notice. 

Finally, Wendy's house comes into view. Relief floods through you, giving you a final burst of energy. You sprint the last few yards, your breath coming in short gasps as you reach her front door, your chest heaving. You knock urgently, praying she's home. After what feels like an eternity, the door swings open, and Wendy's concerned face appears.

"What's wrong?" she asks, taking in your flushed face and frantic eyes. She was wearing a purple cardigan overtop of her denim shorts and white tank top, he silky black hair pulled away from her face in a claw clip that matched her small silver hoop earrings. She looked a lot more cohesive than you did. 

You take a deep breath, your words tumbling out in a rush. "Kyle almost kissed me at the lake when we were swimming in our underwear. I think he was going to, but I pulled away. The next morning he didn't bring it up but he kept smiling and trying to hold my hand and giving me stuff and I didn't know what to do! You know I don't know what to do, I'm not nice like his other girlfriends. I just got really freaked out and stopped talking to him and after we went home I blocked him on everything and I haven't seen him since. He was so sweet it's making my teeth rot. And now he's at my house, and I don't know what to do. I like him, Wendy, but I'm so scared. I'm a ruiner, I'll ruin everything and he'll go back to hating me and I'll just see him once a year around the holidays with his wife and kids and I'll just be so bitter staring at him and just thinking 'What if?' like what if I was the one who went to house warming parties with him but I won't because I couldn't sort myself out in highschool but then there's if I do tell him it's just a crazy cycle of it never working out and there's always going to be that unspoken thing between us of what was almost there. My dad told me he was there to see me and I fucking scaled the side of my house and ran here barefoot just so I wouldn't have to see him."

"Oh my god," Wendy mutters "Okay, it's fine, just calm down a bit and we can talk in my room," She gently grabs your bicep to guide you up the stairs.

You nod, beginning to follow her though your eye catches on a black mop of hair peaking over the back of the couch. You freeze  "Hey, Stan," You clear your throat in an attempt to sound casual 

Slowly, he turns his head to look at you, his face still and unreadable "Hey."

"Who- uh, are you texting?" You try for a friendly smile but it comes across as looking a little psychotic. 

He stays quiet, placing his phone on the coffee table slowly, his eye contact not moving from yours. "No one."

"Do you mind if I see your phone really quick?" You approach him steadily, forcing yourself or at least trying to be calm. 

"Yeah, I do mind."

The phone dings "Stan, don't look at that message- hey," You point a finger at him like he's a toddler and you're trying to keep him away from an electrical fire. "Stan, I'm not fucking around.”

Before Stan can grab his phone, you dive for it, snatching it off the table and backing away from Stan while you read them, quickly skimming over the messages between him and Kyle. It wasn't brief, Stan had of course informed his best friend about the obscene amount of information you dumped onto Wendy and that you were there. "What the fuck?" You turn to look at him.

"He's my best friend," Stan defends himself. "Can you please give me my phone back, dude?" You take it upon yourself to type out a quick message for Kyle from Stan, along the lines of 'I hope you die, lose this number' before dropping the phone on an armrest and heading for the laundry room at the speed of sound.

Wendy was uncommonly at a loss for words, eyes shooting between Stan gripping his hair while he read what you sent and you tearing the laundry room apart. 

"You traitor asshole cunt!" You shout while rummaging through the dryer. The clothes inside were still fresh and warm, you grab the first two socks you see, one of them a bright red knee-high sports sock, the other one is ankle length and covered in little prints of puppies. You didn't care, yanking them on over your feet while you hop to the shoe rack. "Wendy, which pair do you care about the least?"

"Maybe the boots-

Before she could even finish her sentence you were pulling on the brown leather cowboy boots that were mid-length on your shins "I'll bring these back later!" You yell, running back out the door. "Love you, Wendy. kill yourself, Stan!" 

While running away from Wendy's without bothering to shut the door, you fumble for your phone and try to dial up Red whilst manoeuvring around trash bins and bikers so you don't take yourself out. 

"Hey," Red's voice comes through, light and lazy. "Why are you calling me? You never call me."

"It's honestly so fucked up, I might throw up if I talk about it," You pant into the phone, a little short-breathed from the excess cardio while you ran nowhere in particular "Essentially, I hate Stan Marsh as of now."

"What an asshole," Red says. The two of you were like the blind leading the blind. You didn't need to give her an in-depth backstory, if you said you hated someone then she hated them too "Fuck him, where are you?" 

"Running away from Wendy's," You look around for some sign of where you are, spotting a traffic sign over an intersection "Uh- I'm on Walden."

"Are you actually running?"

"Yes!"

"How bad is your situation?"

"So bad, dude."

"Like bad for a normal person or bad for you because you kinda think everything is awful," You can hear the sound of a huge splash and cheering over the line.

"It's actually bad this time," You failed to mention that you screwed yourself over.

"Okay, well, I'm not far off Walden right now," She moves the phone away from her to mutter a question to someone else "I'm pre-gaming with some friends, it's getting kinda crazy-" She stops mid-sentence to laugh at something, you can hear the smile in her voice "I'll send you the address. Okay?"

"Yeah, okay, thanks," You utter, hanging up and copying the address into your phone. Your head would swerve around to be sure Kyle's car wasn't in sight.

The destination wasn't far from your initial spot. The neighbourhood seemed unusually quiet for a street that was supposed to be housing a rager. The houses are quaint, with well-manicured lawns and the soft glow of porch lights flickering as dusk settles in. You glance at the address Red sent you again, reassuring yourself that you're in the right place.

Slowly you approach the house, a charming two-story with a wide front porch adorned with potted plants and a welcome mat that reads 'WELCOME wait, who did you vote for?'

Feeling a bit uncertain, you decide to call Red, phone pressed to your ear as you walk up the front steps. She answers on the second ring, her voice bright over the sounds of music and chatter in the background. "What's up, whore? where are you?"

"Are you sure this is the right address?"

"Yeah, we're in the backyard, just let yourself in," She says through static. On the other end you can hear laughing and shouting, she excuses herself before hanging up.

With confidence slightly restored, you push the door open, immediately met by the sound of laughter carrying through the home. The scent of home-cooked food fills the air—roast chicken, freshly baked bread, and something sweet and cinnamon-y you can't quite place. Children dart around your legs, laughing and chasing each other, while an older couple sits on a couch, reminiscing over a photo album.

As you make your way through the house, your eyes widen in surprise when you notice a collection of shotguns mounted on the wall. Your heart skips a beat, and a wave of nervousness washes over you.

"Who are you and why are you in my home?" You hear a gruff voice from behind you and turn to see an alarmingly large man. He was taller than anyone you had seen, with a bald shiny head, and muscles bulging out of his white polo. 

You glance past him and notice the decorations—a banner that reads 'Happy Family Reunion!' strung across the living room, balloons bobbing gently in the corner, and framed photos of smiling faces you don't recognize lining the walls.

In the living room sits a large group of people, almost every single one blonde, they all stare at you from wherever they are in the room. Glancing back at the threatening display of guns and the photo of the man in front of you happily smiling while he holds up the corpse of a deer, you fumble for an answer "The entertainment, your wife hired me."

"My wife passed away last year."

"Oooohhhhh my god," You mutter and your eyes widen slightly but you make it a point to stay relaxed "That's what I am, she spoke to me from beyond the grave and guided me here, she has messages for you."

He looks like he's about to say something but a woman shoots up from the coach, a sharp exhale escaping through her lips. "What did she say?" Her eyes are wide, her face in shock as she beckons you into the living room.

With a dramatic flair, you place your hand on your forehead and close your eyes. "I'm getting a strong feeling," you say, your voice low and mysterious. This was your absurd and desperate attempt not to end up like the deer in the photo. It didn't help that you were dressed like a blind child who picked their own clothing. 

The family members around you fall silent, watching with curious expressions. You open your eyes slowly, pretending to gaze into a distant realm. "I see... a long journey ahead for someone in this room," you continue, pointing vaguely.

A woman wearing a turquoise blouse leans forward eagerly, careful not to spill her wine. "Really? What else do you see?"

You touch your hands to your head and close your eyes, furrowing your brows the same way you had seen fortune tellers do it in the movies "I'm getting the letter N, is there an N name anywhere here?"

Someone raises her hand, eyebrows drawing in slight worry "I'm Nancy."

You open your eyes and point at her "Nancy, you are going to suffer a terrible and painful death."

Nancy squeaks, a hand flying over her mouth while a man gently rubs soothing circles on her back. Everyone stares at you expectantly, waiting for you to continue with eager eyes. "Keep going," The man urges you.

"I see flying, wings- no! A plane," You say opening your eyes "Does anyone have a trip coming up?"

An older man raises his hand "My wife and I are going to Quebec."

"Why would you go to Quebec on purpose?" You wrinkle your nose, muttering before getting back in character "Cancel your trip or you will get diseased and you will die."

Gasps sound from the mini crowd in front of you, each of them murmuring to another. "What will happen in Quebec?"

"An evil French Canadian waiter will spit in your drink and will give you herpes."

They gasp again "How would herpes kill me?"

You shrug "You will die for unrelated reasons but you will regret Quebec on your deathbed." 

"What do you see for me?" A woman asks, a long floral sundress cascades down to her ankles. Her blonde hair is pulled back into a ponytail and her striking blue eyes shake you to your core. 

"I see a man in an army uniform, yes, he has short hair, wait-no, it's not an army uniform, it's a prison uniform. You will marry a convicted felon," You say simply, giving her a little smile. 

A woman with a necklace that reaads 'Sarah' looks at you, her eyes wide with fascination. "What about me? Can you see anything for me?"

You nod, feeling more confident in your role. "I see... a new opportunity coming your way, something related to your passion," you say, seeing a photo of her on the wall at a book signing with an author you didn't recognize. "It will be challenging, but very rewarding."

"Oh my goodness," Sarah smiles, nudging the girl next to her.

With every passing second, you just wanted to leave more and more, the stress only continued to build as lies spilled from your lips. You look at the walls, so many photos of the family going to church and spending Christmas together, one of them in a manger, dressed for the nativity. "I see something divine." 

At your words, everyone is captivated once more. They were hanging on every word like it was gospel, sipping their glasses of wine and bottles of beer. 

"It's holy- yes, very holy," You nod, eyes pressed shut while you randomly gesture into the air in front of you. You gasp sharply, one hand going to your heart "It's a message from the son of the lord!" You exclaim.

"What did he say?" One of the women sits up, the same one who insisted you (a stranger) entertain them by reading their fortunes "Tell me now, please."

"Jesus is going to be in Nashville on September 11th," You lower your hands from your head. 

The room falls quiet, only hushed whispers between a handful of people "Jesus is gonna be in Tennessee on 9/11?" The buff man asks. 

"Um, yeah, yup, that is what I said," Now do you realize what you said and all you can do is pray he doesn't take one of those guns on the wall and stuff you like taxidermy. 

"Whose ready for drinks?" A woman comes in with a smile, carrying a little tray of shot glasses. Looking closer at the glasses you can see each of them with a little print of the confederate flag on top.

"Oh my god," You mutter under your breath and cough to hide your panic. Thinking quickly, you grip your hair with one hand, squeezing your eyes shut and letting your free hand grasp at the air "That's it..." You say, quietly "The void has gone black."

Some of them sound disappointed, others indifferent but one particular skeezy man catches your attention. You hadn't noticed him watching the entire thing all eery like he had been lurking in the shadows. 

"Actually," You say. The lanky man stands against a wall, nursing a beer bottle and grinning at you in a way that makes you squirm. His hair is so greasy that you thought you could've fried a fish on it, on top of his blue jeans there are little crusty white stains, a suspicious wet spot in an unfortunate area. You point at him "Check his hard drive." 

You don't want to spend another second in that room, quickly you dash away while the attention turns on the creepy man. Back down the corridor, the same way you came in, you pass decoration that is very telling to the family's nature, you missed it completely on the way in. 

While scurrying out of the house, you pass the liquor cabinet. Snatching a black leather purse off the counter and dumping out the contents, you look around and quickly squat down. You almost feel bad stealing then look above the cabinet to see the confederate flag hung beneath a sleek frame then you don't feel so bad. 

Quickly and quietly, you slip a bottle of whiskey and another vodka into the bag. Just as before you shut the cabinet, you glance around once more and snatch the fancy tequila in the blue, white, and yellow bottle, intricate designs over the glass. You couldn't show up to a party empty-handed.

Just as you reach the lawn without being caught, your phone rings in your pocket. To no surprise, it's Red "Hey, I totally gave you the wrong address."

"Oh, really?" Sarcasm drips from your tone as you continue moving, looking back at the house. 

"Yeah, so- we're on our way to the party, we can meet there if you want the address."

"Are you going to send me to a rednecks house again?"

"No, what the fuck happened?" She asks, tone shifting slightly. 

"I'll tell you when I get there," You exasperate, picking up your pace. "Just send me it- no, turn on your damn location and I'll find you, okay?"

“Oki doke, whatever you wanna do," She mumbles into the phone, sending you a link and hanging up. 

You glance at her location. Red really wasn't far if you took a shortcut and didn't have to go all the way around the streets. If you could cut through two backyards, you were basically there.

You turn down a narrow alley, the dim light casting long shadows from the overhanging branches. The smell of freshly cut grass mingles with the faint aroma of a barbecue, and you find a low fence that seems easy enough to climb over. You hoist yourself up, swinging one leg over, then the other, and drop softly onto the other side.

As you straighten up, you realize you've landed in the middle of a children's birthday party. Brightly coloured balloons are tied to chairs, streamers hang from the trees, and kids in costumes are running around, shrieking with laughter. The juxtaposition of the chaotic, cheerful scene against your inner turmoil is almost surreal.

Before you can backtrack, a woman in her late thirties with a stern expression approaches you. She is carrying a plate of cupcakes, and her brow furrows as she takes in your dishevelled appearance.

"Excuse me, can I help you?" she asks, her tone sharp and unwelcoming.

"Mommy, is that a bad person?" One of the little girls points at you, her lip trembling.

"Really? A bad person? That is so corny."

"Excuse me," The mother grabs her daughter, pulling her close to her while staring at you with furrowed eyebrows. "Who are you?"

"I'm your worst nightmare," You say though everyone stares at you, some of them reaching for their phones to call for help "Kidding, I just have really poor humour."

"Is she homeless?" The daughter looks up to her mother, eyes wide and her voice squeaky. 

"That's just rude, man, like straight up," You shake your head slightly "You should teach your kid some manners."

"I will not have someone on drugs tell me how to raise my child," Her voice rises.

"I am not on drugs, for once, actually," You say and regret it the second it's out. 

"Leave," She says plain and firmly. You didn't need to dissect her words to figure out why she didn't want you there. 

"Yeah, okay," As you turn to leave, your eyes fall on the plate of cupcakes the woman is still holding. They look delicious, and in a moment of defiance and impulse, you reach out and grab one.

"Mommy, she's taking a cupcake," A little boy wearing a Bluey shirt says. His voice is whiney and his little potbelly spills from the short. 

"Look at you, I don't think you need any more cupcakes," You retort. 

"You have a big head," He puts his pudgy hands on his hips.

You lick some frosting from the top of the cupcake "Yeah? Well, you're fat so good luck in high school." 

The woman's eyes widen in surprise and then narrow in anger, but she doesn't say anything as you quickly back away, cupcake in hand. You make your way toward the gate at the far end of the yard, feeling the weight of their stares on your back.

Leaving the gate of the backyard party behind, you step back onto the sidewalk, your senses heightening with each step. The cool evening air brushes against your skin, carrying the scent of freshly cut grass and faint hints of barbecue smoke from neighbouring houses. The repetitive sound of Wendy's cowboy boots tapping against the pavement echoes in the stillness, punctuated only by the occasional chirp of crickets.

You quicken your pace, driven by a mix of urgency and nervous energy. Your feet move with purpose, yet the path seems to stretch endlessly before you. The streetlights cast elongated shadows, flickering slightly as they illuminate your way. You pass rows of tidy houses, their windows glowing warmly, each one a silent witness to the private lives within.

With each stride, your thoughts race. The embarrassment of crashing the children's birthday party lingers in your mind, mingling with the apprehension of facing Kyle. 

You take a sharp turn down a narrow, tree-lined street. The leaves rustle gently above you, creating a soothing canopy that momentarily eases your racing heart. You glance up, catching glimpses of the darkening sky through the foliage, the first stars beginning to twinkle.

Your breathing steadies, matching the rhythm of your footsteps. You focus on the sound, using it to ground yourself, to keep the swirling emotions at bay. Each step forward feels like a small victory, a deliberate choice to move past the fear and confusion.

The houses become less familiar as you venture deeper into the neighbourhood, the route to the party becoming clearer in your mind. You check your phone for the address, the glow of the screen illuminating your face. The party is only a few blocks away now, and you feel renewed. 

You move with more ease, your steps lighter despite the weight of your emotions that clung to your heels like mud. The distant sound of music and laughter guides you, growing louder with each passing minute.

Finally, you turn a corner and see the house, festooned with strings of lights that glimmer in the fresh darkness and the unmistakable buzz of a gathering in full swing. The sun had just finished setting and you made it. Salvation at last. 

The house is packed with people, the pulse of the music vibrating through the walls and floor. The laughter and conversations swirl around you, but your thoughts keep drifting back to that moment by the lake, the way Kyle's hand felt warm in yours, the look in his eyes before you backed away. 

You spot a group of friends near the kitchen and make your way over, joining their animated discussion. You laugh at their jokes and nod at their stories, but it's all a bit of a blur. Your mind is elsewhere, caught in a loop of what-ifs and maybes.

"Oh my god, hey!" Nichole smiles brightly though it falters when her eyes rake up your body "Why are you dressed like an escaped felon?"

"It'll make me mad if I talk about it," You say simply and pass her to grab a diet Coke from the fridge. 

"What happened?" Annie asks "Red was telling me that there was a thing going on with Stan and you were running from the cops or something." Both of them are done up well, Annie had straightened her hair and Nichole has taken hers out of her braids after months. 

"I'm not running from anyone," You place the leather purse on the kitchen island and begin taking the bottles of liquor out, your friend's eyes widening at the seemingly never-ending supply. 

"You are seriously freaking me out right now," Nichole says, picking up one of the bottles and reading the alcohol percentage "Where did you get this?"

"Don't worry about it," You wave it off. 

"Who's purse is that?" She asks again, eyes narrowing at the black leather.

You shrug, taking a swig of your Diet Coke, it was lukewarm but you still preferred it to the liquor that would surely amplify your awful state and leave you feeling more paranoid than you already were. "Yours if you want it," You push the bag toward her.

Nichole picks it up, eyes widening as she inspects it "Is this a real Birkin?" 

"Shit," You suck a sharp breath through your teeth "I dunno, is it?"

Annie quickly looks over, "Oh my god!" She squeals, eyes lighting up as she leans close to Nichole to look at the bag. She's wearing a pink tank top and low-waisted jeans, effortlessly pretty "Where the hell did you find this?"

"I thrifted it." You lie nonchalantly.

"I can actually keep this?" Nichole holds it close to her chest, hugging it almost protectively. She was in denim shorts and a yellow bikini top though you weren't sure she would even go in the pool. 

"Yeah, I don't care," You did care a little. If it was a big deal to them you couldn't imagine the bag you had stolen was cheap and wanted to keep it away from you, the faux fortune teller who interrupted a family reunion. 

"Are those Wendy's boots?" Annie furrows her eyebrows, looking down at your shoes while Nichole jumps happily up and down with her new bag. 

"Yeah, I had to stop at her place earlier."

"Why didn't you just drive with her?" 

"What?" Your face drops.

"Yeah, she should be here soon," Annie brushes a strand of hair away from her face, revealing large golden hoop earrings. 

"With Stan?" You ask, trying to hide the nervousness in your voice.

"Yeah?" 

You're caught off guard by someone nudging your arm, there stands Tolkien smiling at the three of you "Hey, I didn't know you were coming."

"Me neither," You answer, truthfully. You didn't even know whose house you were at, you just assumed that you probably wouldn't know them anyway.

Tolkien's eyebrows furrow as he looks down at your choice of clothing. You brace yourself for another insult but are met with another response "I think Kyle's wearing the same shirt, did you guys match on purpose?"

"Excuse me?" You poke your head out of the kitchen and glance around, noticing something that sends a fresh wave of embarrassment through you. Both of you are wearing the same band T-shirt. You glance down at your shirt, the familiar logo staring back at you, then look up at Kyle, who seems like he hasn't noticed you yet. He talks animatedly to a couple of people you aren't familiar with. "Tolkien, I need you to switch shirts with me."

"What?" He raises an eyebrow "Are you crazy?"

"Yes!" You say, scuttling deeper into the kitchen to be sure he can't see you "Please?"

"No way, dude."

"Annie?" You turn your attention to her.

She wrinkles her nose at the print of the rotting zombie on your band shirt, it wasn't even close to her style "I'm okay." 

Nichole wasn't even wearing a shirt and she was more tuned in to the observation of her purse than you once again avoiding Kyle. "Fuck," You mutter, carefully exiting the kitchen without another word. 

You moved through the crowded rooms with a purpose, your eyes scanning for any sign of Kyle. Each time you caught a glimpse of him, you quickly altered your path, slipping into different groups of friends and striking up conversations to blend in. The music thumped loudly, and laughter and chatter filled the air, but your mind was solely focused on staying out of Kyle's line of sight.

After what felt like the hundredth near-miss, you decided you needed to change your shirt. The idea of matching with Kyle was driving you crazy, and you hoped a new shirt would help you blend in and avoid awkward questions.

Your first thought is to find Kenny, he was probably there and would switch shirts with you, no questions asked but he wasn't answering your messages so your eyes landed on Adam. You ran track together and joked around on occasion "Hey, Adam," You say sweetly "Can you switch shirts with me?"

"No, I don't like you," He shakes his head, going right back to his conversation. 

"What?" You furrow your eyebrows "I thought we were friends."

"We're not friends, I hate you," he says, agitation clear in his voice. His leg had healed from the horrific injury three months prior. Thinking back to the way you hadn't visited him after his leg snapped in half and how eager you were to replace him, you couldn't really call this out of the blue.

"Wow, jeez, okay," You mutter, turning away. Eye searching the crowd for other people that you knew. "Hey, Butters!" You wave at him. 

"Oh, hey," He looks up with a smile.'

"Do you think you could swap shirts with me?" You had your fingers crossed he would say yes.

"Well that's a really neat shirt and all but I don't think my dad will be super happy if I come home in girl clothes," Butters tells you. He seems somewhat nervous, pulling on each of his fingers one by one to crack them. 

"Okay, thanks anyway, man," You give him a quick pat on the shoulder. "Betsy, hey, can you please please switch shirts with me?"

Betsy gives you an odd look, glancing down at her own outfit. "Sorry, I kind of like my shirt."

Each answer was more or less the same with the more people you asked. "Sophie, can we swap shirts?"

She looks up from her phone, puzzled. "Why do you want to change shirts in the middle of a party?"

Frustration mounting, you continued your search until you spotted an open bedroom door down the hall. You slipped inside, closing the door softly behind you. The room was dimly lit, a cozy hideaway from the party chaos. Your eyes landed on a pile of clothes haphazardly thrown on a chair, and you quickly began to sift through them.

Your fingers brushed against a large, oversized lavender button-up shirt. It wasn't exactly your style, but it would do the job. It looked like it belonged to a morbidly obese man, even then you imagined it would be over-sized on him. You slipped the button-up on over your t-shirt. The fabric was soft and cool against your skin, the oversized fit providing a sense of comfort like you were a child again who was playing dress up in her parents closet.

You glanced at yourself in the mirror, rolling up the sleeves to make the shirt fit a bit better. It was a drastic change from the band T-shirt, but that was exactly what you needed. With a deep breath, you left the bedroom, hoping no one noticed your impromptu outfit change.

This desperation to separate yourself from Kyle was past ridiculous. Why did you hate Kyle in the first place? He was so perfect it made you froth at the mouth with jealousy like you were some dog trying to behave better than him.

There was no way to clear your mind, you felt like you needed a dozen energy drinks just to get a single coherent thought. 

You made your way through the crowded house, dodging groups of partygoers with practiced ease. As you headed towards the bathroom, the pulsating music and loud chatter blurred into the background. You reached the door and found it slightly ajar, the sound of muffled voices coming from inside. With a deep breath, you pushed it open, stepping inside without hesitation.

The dimly lit bathroom was small and cramped, one brunette girl held her friend's blonde hair back while she heaved into the toilet. They barely noticed you as you closed the door behind you, the brunette cast you an apologetic glance. You felt a brief pang of awkwardness, but you brushed it aside, your goal clear in your mind.

You moved quickly to the medicine cabinet above the sink, avoiding eye contact with the couple. Your hands trembled slightly as you opened the cabinet, scanning the shelves for the familiar bottle of caffeine pills. The girl's constant gagging and sobs echoed through the bathroom but you chose to ignore it. 

Finally, you spotted the bottle, hidden behind a few other containers. You grabbed it, the cool plastic smooth against your fingers. The couple shifted slightly, and you caught a glimpse of them in the mirror- the brunette gently rubbed soothing circles on her friend's back, uttering hushed affirmations. You unscrewed the cap, shaking out far too many pills into your palm before quickly closing the bottle and returning it to its spot.

With a practiced motion, you popped the pills into your mouth and swallowed them dry, the bitter taste lingering for a moment. You took a deep breath, hoping the caffeine would kick in soon and give you the energy boost you desperately needed.

Leaving the bathroom, you step back into the throbbing energy of the party, the caffeine pills already making your hands tremble slightly. You hoped they would help you focus and regain control, but instead, you felt even more jittery and on edge.

As you weave through the crowd, the buzz of conversation and laughter feels overwhelming. Your mind races, unable to settle on any one thought for more than a few seconds. Your eyes dart around the room, and then you see him- Kyle, standing near the kitchen, talking to another girl.

She's leaning in close, her hand lightly resting on his arm, and he's smiling in that charming way that always makes your heart skip a beat. A fresh wave of jealousy crashes over you, stronger than before. The caffeine isn't helping to clear your thoughts; it's only making you more anxious and jittery.

You knew that you didn't have a right to get between him and this girl, especially after you had dodged him for days on end like he was a disease you were desperate not to catch. 

You try to take a deep breath, to calm yourself, but it feels impossible. Your mind is a chaotic whirl of emotions and half-formed thoughts. You want to look away, to move on and distract yourself, but you can't. Your eyes are glued to Kyle and the girl, your heart aching with each passing moment.

He laughs at something she says, and you feel a sharp pang in your chest. You know you need to get a grip, to pull yourself together, but it's as if your body and mind are working against you. The jitteriness from the caffeine pills makes it hard to stand still, and you find yourself fidgeting, your fingers tapping nervously against your thigh.

You look around for a scapegoat and your eyes land on Kenny, he's cheering on some kind of drinking game. "Hey, Kenny," You say way louder than intended, causing him to flinch.

"Hey, dude," He grins. He's wearing a pair of sunglasses despite being inside at night, you didn't need to be a genius to know he was covering up the redness of his eyes. Kenny looks you up and down, chuckling slightly "Jeez, what are you on? You're shaking."

"It's just caffeine," you shake your head, trying to soothe the jitters but you are near twitching. 

"Uh, okay, buddy," He slings an arm around you, pulling you in to watch the game was partaking in. The two of you were contrasting each other perfectly. Kenny was laughing and smiling, his whole body loose, eyes half-lidded beneath his glasses while you stood stiffly, eyes wide and very much aware. 

A group of people stood in a circle around a table, pointing at whoever was most likely to do the thing one of them said. "Who is most likely to start a cult?" One of the girls slurs her words and the group points at some guy wearing a baseball cap backwards who pounds back his drink.

Never had you realized how awful it was to be the only sober person in a large group if you were still qualified as sober from the amount of caffeine you swallowed back like candy. Kenny gives you a squeeze on the shoulder, shaking you slightly as he laughs loudly at something you missed completely. 

You were so acutely aware of everything all at once but also nothing at all. Every sound, every movement, every flicker of light seems amplified, almost painfully vivid

You watch as Kenny raises his arms in triumph, a wide grin spreading across his face. The others cheer, their voices blending into a cacophony of celebration and camaraderie. For a moment, you feel a pang of longing to join in, to lose yourself in the carefree abandon of the game. But the hyperactivity from the caffeine, combined with the turmoil over Kyle, makes you hesitant.

"Okay, most likely to commit a felony?" Millie asks with a lazy smile on her face. Everyone glances around before pointing at Kenny. He grins, taking in all of the cheers and the chanting that eggs him on to finish the drink in his hand. 

In an attempt to distract yourself, you watch the partygoers; as a kid, you always expected more dancing at parties in high school but the reality was that the majority of people just sat around on their phones. Across the room, Cylde stands next to Tolkien and holds up an empty beer bottle, aiming for the recycling bin in the corner. He's clearly had a few drinks, his movements slightly uncoordinated.

"Watch this!" he calls out, his voice filled with drunken confidence though there is that same lopsided smile on his face. "Kobe!" 

You watch as he winds up, his arm swinging back before he throws the bottle. You see the bottle veer off course, heading straight toward you and you feel the inevitable dread. There was no time to think between when the bottle left his hand and when it hit you in the head. Next to him, Tolkien's jaw drops, looking down at his friend in horror. 

The bottle smashes over your head with a sickening crash. Pain explodes in your skull, a white-hot flash though you don't even make a sound. The room goes silent, the music and chatter fading into a distant hum. You feel the sting of glass shards embedding in your scalp, the warmth of blood trickling down your forehead, mingling with sweat.

Clyde's face is full of horror as his hands grip his hair, his eyes wide, his mouth moving but the words not reaching your ears. Your heart races even faster, adrenaline mixing with the caffeine, making you feel like you're vibrating from the inside out. The sharp sting of the impact, the throbbing pain, the wetness of the blood, all converge into a sensory overload that leaves you dazed and disoriented.

You stand there, swaying slightly, the world around you a blur of concern and panic. Someone shouts for help, their voice piercing through the fog in your mind. The party now feels distant and unreal, like a dream slipping away as you cling to consciousness. Every detail, every sensation is etched into your mind with excruciating clarity, the caffeine ensuring that you'll remember this moment forever.

"Fuck," You mutter, agitation clinging to your words. You use the sleeve of the lavender button-up to haphazardly wipe away the blood pooling down your face. Everything seemed to get worse with every passing moment, the most awful thing of all is that for what seemed to be the thousandth time that night, everyone was staring at you.

"Holy shit," Even Kenny who was in his own realm seemed to be grounded for a moment as he watched your injury. You give the little crowd of people watching you a thumbs up to signal you are fine and they can go back to their own discussions. 

"It's cool," You take a deep breath, trying to shake it off but you weren't sure there was a thing in this world that could still you. This wasn't a great addition to your very shitty day, you were tired from running and sick from caffeine, frustrated by yourself more than anything.

You stumble away from the disorder of the party, your legs shaky and unsteady beneath you. The room feels too bright, too loud, every sound a sharp jab to your already throbbing head. You need to find a quiet space, somewhere to catch your breath and gather your thoughts. You spot a door slightly ajar down a hallway and make your way towards it, each step feeling like a monumental effort. 

Your breath comes in short, shallow gasps as if the air itself is too thick to inhale. You try to steady yourself, but your hands are trembling uncontrollably, a cold sweat breaking out across your skin. The pain in your head intensifies, each pulse of blood through your veins sending sharp spikes of agony through your skull.

The master bathroom is a welcome retreat from the party's constant buzz. Despite the light almost hurting your head even more and the face in the mirror that was streaked with blood, you were still thankful to be away from all of the little things that worsened this caffeine overdose. 

Yanking the drawers open, you dig around for something to clean yourself up with. You slide one open and find miscellaneous junk though amongst it is the treasure of Spider-Man band-aids. 

You turn on the tap, the sound of running water a steady, calming rhythm. Cupping your hands under the stream, you splash your face, the cold water a sharp contrast to the heat of your skin. You grab a towel, pressing it gently to the cut on your forehead, wincing at the sting. The towel quickly turns crimson, and you press harder, hoping to staunch the bleeding.

Looking down at the towel and then back up at yourself in the mirror, you wondered if this injury was worth going to the hospital for. You were almost sure you still had painkillers left over from your broken nose and none of the cuts seemed terrible, they were cat scratches.

The only thing that worried you was the dull thudding in the back of your head though that had been there since you entertained a room full of confederates. With all of the injuries you had acquired, you made a general rule to go in the morning if it was drastically worse. It was all just a waiting game for you.

The door to the master bedroom that was attached to the bathroom opens and clicks shut. You don't even bother checking who it is, you already have a sneaking suspicion as you continue to dab away at the sticky blood.

You had left the door ajar and it pushes further in softly, and Kyle steps in, his tall frame filling the small space. His eyes widen when he sees you, taking in the blood and the glass shards scattered in the sink.

You freeze when you see him in the mirror's reflection and turn to look at him slowly. Eyes desperate and silently pleading "Kyle, please, I just can't right now." 

"I'm not asking you to." 

"What?"

"You don't have to say anything," Kyle moves closer, his presence comforting in the small room. He takes a deep breath, then looks at you with a certain stillness. "Just let me help."

With hesitance, you slowly nod. He steps behind you, his height making him tower over you slightly. The warmth of his body close to yours sends a shiver down your spine. As you continue to clean the cuts on your forehead, Kyle's fingers gently part your hair, searching for any remaining shards of glass.

His touch is careful, each movement precise and deliberate. You feel the warmth of his hands, the gentle pressure as he meticulously picks out the tiny pieces of glass. His focus is intense, his brows furrowed in concentration. The proximity makes you acutely aware of every sensation- the way his breath brushes against your ear, the soft rustle of his clothing, the subtle scent of his cologne.

"Hold still," he murmurs softly, his voice a low, soothing rumble. "I've almost got it."

You try to stay as still as possible, the combination of his gentle touch and the methodical task helping to calm your nerves. The pain in your head throbs dully, tears forming in your eyes from it. The intimacy of the moment is heightened by the silence, broken only by the occasional clink of glass shards being dropped into the sink.

You glance at his focused reflection, continuing to clean your cuts in the mirror. The antiseptic stings less now, and the pain fading to a manageable level. Kyle works with quiet efficiency, his fingers deftly removing the last few shards. He drops them into the sink, then runs his fingers through your hair one last time, ensuring it's free of any debris.

"All done," he says, stepping back slightly. "How do you feel?"

You take a deep breath, looking at your reflection. The cuts are clean, the blood washed away, and the Spider-Man band-aids on the counter are ready to be applied. You meet Kyle's gaze in the mirror, tears pricking in your eyes. 

"Fine," You say quietly, shifting your eyes to look anywhere but him. 

When you bend down slightly to reach into the band-aid box, Kyle catches a glimpse of your band-shirt beneath the collar of the comically large button-up. He looks down at his own shirt, frowning slightly. 

The moment hangs in the air, charged with anticipation. You can feel the unspoken tension, the pull between you growing stronger. The party outside fades into insignificance, leaving just the two of you in this small, intimate space. The world narrows down to the warmth of his hand, the steady rhythm of his breath, and those unspoken moments that bind you together.

Over every little cut, you slap a Spider-Man band-aid over it, and a couple of them end up in your hairline while Kyle hangs back and watches. 

But then, the memory of last week rushes back—the way Kyle had leaned in, his breath mingling with yours, only to pull back at the last second. You had avoided him since then, afraid of the vulnerability it had stirred within you.

Now, standing so close to him, the air thick with unspoken tension, you can feel the same pull. "Are you okay?" He asks, his voice soft.

"Yeah," You wriggle yourself away from him, leaving the mess on the bathroom counter and sitting on the edge of the bed. The satin beneath you concaves like pearls bending in the sunlight. 

"Are we okay?" He asks, standing in the doorway and watching you.

You take a deep breath, your hands fidgeting nervously in your lap. "I don't know." This was the inevitable, the very thing you spent all day trying to get away from and the whole week prior trying to plan around. 

"Why have you been avoiding me?"

"I'm not avoiding you-

"You blocked me on Roblox."

"Okay fine," You raise your hands in defence. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen. You needed the rest of summer to smother the flame into ash and let it die,  "I know I haven't been fair to you-

"Why, though?"

"Because it's too much," Your voice is louder than you intended it to be. You couldn't even begin to sort out the cluster fuck that was your emotions. "It's gonna ruin our friendship." You didn't even want to say what 'it' was. The both of you knew clearly but still, you tiptoed around it like the earth might shatter if you say it. 

"It's ruined anyways." Kyle shakes his head.

You're eyes widen slightly, heartbeat picking up "You're drunk."

"I'm not."

"That's worse," You shudder. "Look at me, I just pretended to be a fortune teller in a redneck's house and I steal and I smell like cigarettes and teenage angst."

"I don't care."

"Why?" You press "I'm not even nice to you, and I'm just- generally fucked. Okay? I'm coming to terms with the fact that I'm not a very good person or even really an interesting one. I've been so awful to you, do you remember all of those things I've said to you? Remember when I stole your dad's Viagra to sell it and then I blamed it on you?"

"Yeah, and-

"And? There shouldn't be an 'and'. I'm not a nice girl and this will be the biggest mistake you ever make, that's why I couldn't kiss you at the lake because trust me- I wanted to. Kyle, you don't know what you want and I don't know why you're trying so hard. What if it doesn't work out?"

"But what if it does?" He asks "What if it does work out and we're happy together?" 

Your words die in your throat, eyes brimmed with tears that threatened to spill from the sheer pressure crushing you like some kind of torture; had you been a sinner in some kind of ancient myth, you thought that this would be your eternal punishment. His presence is so incredibly unnerving, the way he stares you down, his face unwavering. You shake your head "We don't make sense-

"And we won't, ever, we don't have to." 

 "Have you thought about this? Like really thought about this. Our families and the fact we'll have to see each other every year no matter what we do. We won't ever move past this." You were scared to death and he seemed perfectly fine. 

He moves from the doorway, stepping forward toward you "Can you please just be straight with me?" Kyle asks, voice rising slightly "Do I have a chance or not? because I have been turning myself inside out trying not to like you." 

At first, his words feel like some type of cruel prank and then they settle in your head like a nightmare."Oh my god,” You scoff, gripping your hair, eyes wide while you stand up from the bed. "I'm gonna scream, I'm going fucking insane.”

"I wanna hear you go insane. If you're going to scream, I want to hear it!" He exasperates  "I don't care what it is, I just want you to let me in."

You stared at him, eyebrows drawn in while your wide eyes tried to study each breath from him, every shift in his posture like he was hiding some ulterior motive. You couldn't believe, that he still liked you after everything. 

The thought of kissing him crossed your mind once again. The idea itself made you want to crawl out of your skin but you had to test it just to be sure. Swiftly, you close the gap between you, your lips brushing against his in a tentative, searching kiss. Kyle responds immediately, his hand slipping to the back of your neck, pulling you close.

The kiss deepens, all the unspoken emotions of the past week pouring into it. When you finally pull back, breathless and heart racing, you aren't sure that the awe and adoration in Kyle's eyes match the fear and panic in yours. 

He shifts his hands to hold firmly onto your waist, fingers digging into the plush skin of your midriff like you might disappear if he were to let go "Don't leave again, I can't do this again."

Tears prick at your eyes, a mixture of relief and overwhelming emotion threatening to spill over. The caffeine that once fueled your anxiety now seems to heighten your awareness of every sensation- every touch, every breath shared between you.

"Okay," You bury your face in his shoulder, the familiar scent of him filling your senses, a mixture of pine and something uniquely him. His cheek rests against your temple, his breath warm against your skin as he murmurs into your hair. You feel the strength in his arms, the way his muscles tense slightly as he holds you, the steady rise and fall of his chest against yours.

 His hands move slowly, one settling at the small of your back, the other cradling the back of your head, fingers threading gently through your hair. It's a protective gesture, making you feel cherished and safe. You feel the warmth of his skin through the layers of your shirt fabric, the subtle tremor in his touch. 

"My head hurts," You utter softly. You take a deep breath, inhaling the familiar scent of him, and as you exhale, the tension begins to melt away.

 "I know," He tilts his head down, pressing a soft, lingering kiss to the top of your head. He gives you a light squeeze, his arms tightening around you momentarily, just to be sure you won't slip away.

A/N: 95k words and they finally kissed

[fennecfiree]

Hc dump from my notesapp

Stan listens to slipknot

Butters is half canadian

Jimmy likes sonic

Kyle is a really picky eater

Cartman is autistic and has ocd

Mr garrison has ocd, autism and DID

Stan plays animal jam with Wendy

Kyle plays club penguin

Craig paints his nails black and sometimes paints Tweeks nails

Kyle sleeps with a orca whale plushie

Clyde has dyslexia

Tweek has fucked up teeth from meth, acne, skin sores, and he's really skinny.

Wendy has 2 cats (1 white cat named sparkles 1 orange cat named cheesecake)

Bebe unironically uses those glasses nerdy Snapchat filters

Stan works at McDonald's in his late teens and gives Kyle free food

Sheila has a Facebook and shares every single moment of ther life on it, she used to post pictures of Kyle when he was a baby and ike

Cartmans actually pretty good at drawing. Kyle sucks at art tho and gets embarrassed whenever Cartman sees his art cuz Cartman makes fun of him like crazy for it

Butters favorite animal is bunnys

Nichole and Kyle still hang out. Nichole doesn't really have a crush on Kyle anymore but Kyle still kinda likes her

Kyle is scared of dogs, especially big dogs

Wendy wants to be a docter

Kenny gets really cold easily since he's malorished

Kyle is lactose intolerant

Mr garrison has a calico cat named tom

Kyle is oblivous to any and all romantic interest someone may show him

Stan forgets to eat a lot

Kennys favorite season is summer

Bebe does kyles hair sometimes

Stan gets car sick really easily

Stan is the oldest in the group, cartmans the 2nd oldest, kyles the 3rd, and Kenny's the 4th

Shelly has a Tumblr and looks at yaoi and yuri

[secretsandwritinggs]

Daniel: We need all the tips we can get to take down Kreese and Silver

Johnny: Um, I’ve got a tip for ya and it’s pink 😙

Sam:

Miguel:

Robby:

Kenny:

Tory:

Anthony, munching on candy: That’s kinda gay

Kenny, turning to look at him: Kinda..?

Anthony, nodding: Yeah

[checkergoat]

More of these guys, Am I gonna stop making these? Probably not

I wanna to experiment with Rick's hair so, I don't hate the gray hair on both Mr Garrison or Rick I just wanted to mess around

I redesigned Gary Harrison

gave Micheal a cure shirt, only because I wanted to give a causal goth look

Garrison has removable hair, I found out he's was only 41, which was a bit shocking to find that out since he looked older but, again wanna to experiment

Gave Rick a watch and little glasses, I thought it would look cool on him so yeah

Nothing changed much about Nichole, Sharon, Gerald and Stan

Now Heidi, I got inspired by saprozoicworm, when it came with the scarf a bit

And lastly I made Shelly into a horse girl, which she already is but still

[bunnybonesstudio]

Cobra Kai Fact #699

Robby really loves to garden!

He can pretty much save any plant from the brink of death and tends to the Miyagi-Do dojo’s plant life.

He’s bonded with Eli in particular over their shared love of flowers and he always gives fresh mini-bouquets to everyone as gifts.

(Bonus: Robby also likes to wear flowers in his hair!)

[spookymultimedia]

[alister312]

fuck it. SP pizza headcanons.

Stan: prefers vegetarian pizza, but isn’t against chicken or a leaner meat like that. avid defender of roast broccoli being a good pizza topping.

Kyle: thinks more than 3 toppings on a pizza is too much. also tends to fold it when he eats (new yorker vibes) and loves brick oven pizza.

Kenny: does not care what you put on the pizza as long as there is SO MUCH cheese. loves pullings slices off the rest of the pizza slowly to see the long cheese strings.

Cartman: NO veggies EVER. gets every type of meat the store offers as a topping. thinks deep dish pizza is the best kind.

Butters: doesn’t care about type of toppings but is pretty insistent about thin crust. he likes when the pizza very crispy.

Craig: eats his pizza with a fork and knife like a fucking weirdo. he just doesn’t like getting oil and sauce on his fingers.

Tweek: prefers to make his own pizza rather than order it from somewhere. insists that nowhere can get the topping distribution ratio correct like he can.

Clyde: believes there is no such thing as a bad pizza and tries to prove it by putting the weirdest combos he can find as toppings. claims sprinkles add a “je ne sais quoi” to anchovy pizza.

Tolkien: strong supporter of pineapple on pizza and will defend it when anyone complains. also thinks square pizza is a superior pizza shape.

Jimmy: STUFFED CRUST FIEND. usually just plain cheese stuffed crust is fine but he likes when there’s more options.

Gregory: he does not eat pizza, he eats flatbreads. but if he does eat pizza, it must be a traditional margherita/Naples-style.

Christophe: only ever eats day old pizza out of the fridge, cold. not many toppings taste good this way, so he usually gets just cheese. maybe sausage.

Wendy: can eat regular tomato sauce pizza but much prefers white/pesto sauce pizza. she’s desperately trying to convince others that it tastes much better.

Bebe: if it has mushrooms she will NOT fucking touch. even if you pick them off. goes wild sprinkling parmesan and red pepper flakes on top.

Nichole: mainly goes for pepperoni pizza— it’s a classic for a reason. also knows every delivery person by name since she orders pizza so often for ttrpg nights.

Heidi: tends to like all pizzas and toppings, but never eats the crust. she always offers it to the room or just throws it away.

[everythingwasnormalhere]

Okay okay so I’m not sure if anyone’s asked this but do you have any cool facts/headcannons about the characters that you’d like to share?

hmm idk if you mean them in general or the DPau specifics? assuming it's my main au but if not just tell :D

every piercing the characters have? you can assume kenny made them and you'll almost surely be right XD

butters and stan were in the goths at the same time at one point :3

ike joined the goths like a month after stan left them, tricia and karen literally dragged him out of there ("stop corrupting our computer nerd you assholes!")

firkle still hangs out with TaTI (tricia and those idiots) even after that XD

butters craig and kenny = autistic communication

bebe = straightest-looking lesbian queen

wendy = aroace icon

plural cartman canon ( @richierambles your fucking cult 😔 /aff )

carol (paraguayan) and laura (peruvian) used to share tea in spanish when their kids were little, due to this craig and kenny had playdates often :) this eventually stopped tho :(

timmy gets an AAC on his teens and he's suddenly one of the kids who cuss more in the whole school (slay)

he gets in trouble with PC principal for saying the c and r slurs (timmy like ".-. dude u dumb fr")

most of the CD songs are sung by stan but butters has sung 3, jimmy 1 and kenny 2 :)

jimmy often helps with the lyrics but he doesn't like singing as much

ike plays baseball at some point

death-caused chronic pain kenny!!!

kenny likes drawing :3

butters and heidi being vent buddies (they both fucking hate cartman)

karen stealing kenny's parka when it doesn't fit anymore

late night calls between stan and kyle<3

actually stan just texting/calling kyle whenever he can't sleep

clyde becoming a bit insecure about his weight since when he's selected as the 2nd fattest kid in school

autistic craig

creek hanging out in a gap under the stairs at school when either of them gets overwhelmed

clyde venting to tweek about stuff (mainly his mom's death but a bit of everything) and tweek being surprisingly good at listening<3

jimmy being friends with literally everyone at school

nichole being the same (legally impossible to hate her<3) (inspired by my incredibly nichole-coded classmate)

tolkien, stan, red, wendy and craig play Brawl Stars because i say so :3

[viioggvl]

Everyone in Cobra Kai is great—Amazing, even, to be honest. But,

You gotta admire how observant Robby tends to be. When he taught Cobra Kai Miyagi Do techniques? I’m pretty sure most other characters wouldn’t even know what to do. They wouldn’t be a leader like how Robby was.

And yeah yeah, “Miguel is the original King Cobra”, I understand that, but Robby was the better King Cobra. I do love Miguel, dont get me wrong, but Robby knew how to lead. With or without orders. He wasn’t ordered to teach Cobra Kai how to do Miyagi Do.

He just wanted to win. He showed that there is no specific way to win as long as he did win.

And he does deserve a win. Him and Tory. They’ve been through so much.

Again, I do love everyone on that show, even Sam (because not everything was her fault, and thru through the embarrassing times..) but they got their wins.

Hawk, Miguel, Sam. They got their wins. Robby was robbed TWICE and Tory never got a win. (Silver cheating doesn’t count.)

Robby deserves his pain to be recognized because,

“I just fought my soon to be step-brother (my dad didn’t tell me until later (s5)) and my dad and his new girlfriend are having a baby and I am totally fine even after I’ve gone through so much trauma and never got a real happy ending bc my gf and kid that I took under my wing is still in Cobra Kai.”

And that might seem like I’m over looking Robby’s trauma, but it’s right there.

I think everyone needs their happy ending, but I think Robby needs his pain to be more looked into.

Anyways Robby is really Observant. (SORRY I GOT OFF TRACK IDEK WHAT I WAS SAYING..)

[richierambles]

Cartman's system: headmate list 2.0

Been thinking thoughts idk

This list would be their alters when their body's 15yo (sorry it's long I might make a shorter one later-)

Thanks to @mischieviousmusic and @everythingwasnormalhere for standing my infodumping about this au XD

Littles:

Anne:

6 yo

She/her

Loves playing tea party (main fronter during it)

When it's the other littles playing, she mainly roleplays as the Polly Prissipants doll

Sometimes cofronts when they're at class, but isn't allowed to talk to their classmates

Almost always at cofront when Love's fronting

After they come out, she's closest to Stan and Butters

They're not out to Karen, but Anne's spent time with her too

Whenever she talks to Kenny she asks him how she's doing<3

Ginger in headspace (it felt important to mention this don't ask why)

Finn:

8yo

He/him

Main fronter almost all the time they're playing

Roleplays as most of the other toys when they're playing tea party though

Loves playing cowboys

Frienemies with Artemis, they'll either hate each other or be best friends all the time

After they come out, he's closest to Kenny (but will much rather hang out with his sysmates)

Looks and acts like a Typical White Boy™

Artemis:

5yo

He/they

Introjected from Artemis Clyde Frog (the stuffed animal), but lost almost all his connection to it since the day it died (and exclusively goes by Artemis, hates his other names)

Roleplays himself when playing with the other syskids, never a main fronter while playing

Spent a long while (2-3 years) dormant, only came back after they came out, one day when the system was hanging out with their friends

The gang were all like "wtf who's this idk this alter-" but finally figured it out (mainly Kyle did)

SUPER close to Kyle

Actually whenever Artemis fronts they'll text Kyle first thing no matter what

Also close-ish to Butters

Has dark skin in the innerworld, his iw appearance is human but he always wears a frog hat

Hosts:

Sam:

15yo

he/him

The meaner, stronger Cartman

Is also a protector besides a host

Split from Collins on the Kenny Dies episode

He's the one who used fetuses to built the pizza place because otherwise the guys would've thought he was weak (his thought process is fucking crazy)

One of the few alters who remembers Kenny's deaths

He also knows there's something weird going on in their brain, but has no idea what

Used to cleaning up after everyone else's messes (like acting as if Jenni was Mitch Conners and as if all the Henniffer Lopez thing was just a joke (which backfired so bad...))

After they come out, he hangs out with everyone the same way they always do

Insys, he's trying to get close to 8

^ completely idolatrizes Hitler

Huge on the antisemitism (and general bigotry tbh)

Collins:

14yo

he/him

Split from Sam on the Kenny dies episode

He did want to use the fetuses to save Kenny, and he does consider Kenny his best friend

But he switched out when they got the news Kenny was dead (he was unable to cope with that) and so that's why Sam did what he did

Acts much more like a normal kid than Sam

Actually he's pretty normal for South Park standards

After they come out, he's best friends with Kenny but still friends with the rest of the gang as usual

Not as bad as Sam but definitely not good either

Kyle doesn't hate him as much as he hates Sam (but he'd never say this)

Cartman-sonas (idk how else to call this category):

Irick:

120yo

he/him

Grand Wizard King

Gatekeeper

Fronts mainly while playing SoT (but not every time they do)

Definitely their most responsible alter

^ the others often ask him for advice and stuff

Mildly connected to source

The first time he fronted it was during a SoT game, he found all of it normal (his memories are of the SoT universe) but when they stopped playing he was so weirded out by everything since he's used to a fantasy world

"Cartman stop rping we finished 2 hours ago" "who trapped those guys inside that box 😰" (they were watching TV 💀)

Now (after they came out) they don't play SoT as much, so he only takes full control on special occasions or when Kenny is on a Princess shift (otherkin Kenny 💯)

Only actually close to Kenny because of that, doesn't talk much to anyone else

Grim:

18yo

it/raccoon neos/he

The Coon

Physical protector

Formed because of Cartman's hero persona, but that was long before they started going out as The Coon (they made the first concept for that sona when they were around 4-5yo)

But one day it fronted and decided why not go out fight crime

The others didn't know about this at first

They just knew they had a weird fixation on that "Coon" hero (which, they didn't know where they saw him either but wtv)

But one day Sam decided to go out as Coon (in a rp manner) and found he looked exactly like him

Grim fronted in the middle of it and yk Coon'd for a bit

And Sam did remember that time

So what made more sense is that he'd been The Coon since the beginning

(which wasn't exactly a lie-)

After their syscovery, they assumed Grim formed after they started going out as The Coon

Grim has never confirmed nor denied this

Every single time Kenny's in his Mysterion shift fur gets yeeted to front just so they can argue for a while 💀

Talks to pretty much all the gang but mainly Mysterion'd Kenny

Gets called a furry 24/7 by both his headmates and Kenny (and the rest of the gang sometimes, not as much tho). He fucking hates it.

Adrian:

16yo

he/him

Sexual protector

Metrosexual Cartman

But he's a full-on homosexual

Cartman's metrosexual phase lasted longer than anyone else's because "it's not a phase mom it's who I am 🙄💅"

It was a phase for everyone but Adrian

He's still in that phase

Has hooked up with half the system and even a couple guys out of it

Nothing serious though

Before they came out he respected Cartman's image and didn't flirt with their friends, but after they did there's not a conversation in which he's not telling them the gayest most explicit shit ever

The gang are between confidence boost and absolute utter cringe fucking kill me pls

Theodore:

17yo

he/him

Persecutor (misguided protector) + academic

Formed during Tsst, he's the nice submissive version of Cartman

Would let basically anyone boss him around

Good intentions all the time

Won't do anything bad on purpose

All his submissiveness has gotten them in trouble though

To the point the others try to avoid him fronting as much as they can

He switched in when they were going to kill Liane though, that's good

Goes exclusively by Theodore, some people have tried to call him Theo but he hates that

After they come out, the gang are kinda uncomfortable with him, but Butters warms up to him eventually

(the reason why they're uncomfortable is because Theodore has such a Not Cartman way to act, and also because he's kinda really fucking lame)

(also a bit because Sam has told them all about the times Theodore has messed up)

Sunny/Love

Ageless

love-related neos

Cupid Me

Sexual protector

Hypersexual

When heart's at front, heart'll flirt with Kyle so much it's insane

Is it because fluff's in love with him? Is it because fluff ships kyman? Is it because of a secret third reason? Who knows

Btw everyone else (/sys) was so confused about it at first, like, "...wdym I was acting weird yesterday? I was flirting with you?? And calling you Ky-boo??? Good one dude but quit the bullshit I never did that"

Then when they had the syscovery nobody associated that with some alter doing it

Until a few months after they came out Kyle connected the dots and almost instantly told Sam (who was so pissed off at Sunny 😭)

Love's mostly close to the girls (Nichole, Bebe, even Wendy), but a lot closer to Collins and Anne

Also 💘's never stopped flirting with Kyle, and will never stop (slay)

Introjects:

Eight/8/H:

56yo

he/him

Hitler factive, really connected to source

Protector + Prosecutor

Formed soon after they learnt about Hitler's existence

Fronts at times in which they have to act commanding, such as The Passion Of The Jew or Ginger Kids

Also fronted during some of Tsst, and was who planned (and tried) to kill Liane

After they came out, he didn't front much in front of their friends (he found them lame)

But one day something Bad happened when they woke up and he got triggered to front, so he had to go to school

When the gang noticed he was acting different, they asked who he was

Well, Kyle did, but Eight refused to answer

Stan asked again and H told them his name was Adolf Hitler

Kyle refused to even look at him the rest of that day (and rightfully so)

When someone else switched in, Kyle told them that if 8 didn't at least change his name he'd never talk to any of them ever again, so that's why he goes by Eight/8/H (that was the most he'd accept to change it)

When he's at front (not often) Kyle has to resist the urge to beat him up (he doesn't wanna hurt some of the others), but to find them both in the same room is practically imposible

Jenni:

25yo

she/her

Jenniffer Lopez factive

Talks in spanish sometimes, it's horribly incorrect but she doesn't care

She's the one who does most of the drag

Also the other one (besides Adrian) who hooks up with random guys

She's mostly at cofront rather than full front (talking with the hand because it "looks less weird"), but she's been at full front sometimes too :3

Fucking hates Mitch

After they come out, she hangs out with Bebe sometimes (but not really too often, she'll much rather go with celebrities)

Mitch Conner:

31yo

they/he

Sam first made him up so he could "get rid of" Jenni without looking too insane

But then they actually split

Jenni and Mitch fucking hate each other, Jenni because he steals her identity and Mitch because he thinks she's annoying

Whenever they front they'll find out everything they can about the other alters (and everyone in general) just so they can get stuff from them later

Kyle is so annoyed by his existence for some reason

Other (idk where else to put her soo):

Mae:

21yo

she/her

Persecutor

Originally split when they were a little kid (3-5), to take care of them when Liane didn't (she was kinda neglectful back then)

Also to have them grow up in a hopefully healthier environment

But she started obsessing over growing up and maturing to the point she actually made them unsafe

Such as in 1%, when she mutilated their stuffed animals and almost killed them (by burning down their house) in the process

Now she almost never fronts, and only Irick knows where she is and is allowed to talk to her

[fennecfiree]

ok time to pick some from my sooper long list of hcs AHEM

-Cartman unironically loves the gummy bear song and finds HowToBasic hilarious

-Kenny has a raspy voice (partially from doing the mysterion voice) and snorts when he laughs :3

-the main 4 are devoted captain underpants readers, and Butters is a devoted dog man reader

-Jimmy idolizes Jim Carrey while Timmy idolizes Stephen Hawking

-Wendy plays animal jam and legally owns a rocket launcher because funni

-Nichole collects lalaloopsies

epic outro 💥💥💥💥🪑💥💥

GUMMY BEAR SONG IS AXTUALLY SUCH A BANGER AND ITS NOSTALGIC TO ME IT WAS MY SKIBIDI TOILET 💔💔

WENDY SO PLAYS ANIMAL JAM THAT WAS ALSO MY CHILDHOOD DJDE

1000/10 GUMMY BEAR

10/10 he def does bro he hurt his voice from making it too fucking deep

10/10 I didn't read the book but I watched the show,,,

10/10

10000/10

10/10 LALALOOPSIES SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME

[secretsandwritinggs]

Wasabi Warriors and Cobra Kai

Doing a bit of research is so fun to do every once in a while: I have come to the conclusion that the location of Wasabi Warriors (if you seen Kickin’ It, you would know what this is) and Cobra Kai are 321 miles apart from each other well, their filming locations for their dojos are. I can safely bet that Wasabi Warriors would go against them or Miyagi-Fang first in the tournament.

Where their locations are stated in the shows:

San Fernando - The Karate Kid; Cobra Kai and Miyagi-Fang

San Jose - Wasabi Warriors and Black Dragons

How far apart of these locations in real life:

three hundred twenty-one (321) miles

five hundred seventeen (517) kilometers

How long would it take you to travel:

5 hours 3 minutes - the shortest time

6 hours 49 minutes - the longest time

I know it’s not going to be canon but I just love the idea of envisioning it happening! Alright, enough of me yapping for now and let me hear what you guys think of this - whatever this is..

[statixzcoffee]

Headcanon

Millie Larsen calls her friends many nicknames; darlings, honey, sweet pea, sweet heart and cute thang <3 (I am sorry for the white background.)

[deafeninggalaxycandy]

South Park Face Claims Pt 3: The Girls ☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆

Wendy Testaburger, 21 ♡

Bebe Stevens, 21 ♡

Heidi Turner, 20 ♡

Kelly, 21 ♡ (She was Kenny's girlfriend from Rainforest Shmainforest. She also literally saved his life. I headcanon that she moves to South Park and they get back together)

Red McArthur, 21 ♡

Nichole Daniels, 21 ♡

Tammy Warner, 22 ♡ (another one of Kenny's ex-gf's. I love her character tho so I added her for the hell of it)