#ngl i'm pretty proud of this trash frie post

[theaceofarrows]

Bruce: [over commes] Everyone into positions. We move in on my signal

Dick, Damian and Tim: Copy that

Bruce: 1... 2-

[Jason, walking out of a warehouse while whistling and tossing his helmet up and down]

Dick: Uhh, I'm not the only one seeing this, right?

Tim: B, I thought you said he was being held hostage by Penguin?

Damian: [scoffs] Which is entirely shameful

Bruce: He was...

Jason: [coming up to them] Well, it took you dumbasses long enough

Dick: We thought you were a hostage, Hood!

Jason: Oh, yeah, I was

Bruce: How did you escape?

Jason: I just distracted Cobblepot and his goons while I slipped the restraints

Jason: Told them about the that time Robin and I duct taped Red Robin to a support beam in the attic and left him there for hours while periodically bringing him water and dry Lucky Charms

Bruce: You WHAT-

Dick: THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED TO MY LUCKY CHARMS?!

[Jason and Damian snickering]

Jason: He changed the all the passwords on the Netflix account right when the new season of Bake Off came on, and wouldn't tell us what it was

Damian: It was a just punishment

Tim: [under his breath] And I'd do it again bitches

Jason: So, anyway. Their all tied up in there trying to forget the story. Have fun

Bruce: ...

Bruce: [walking away] I'm leaving. You all can deal with this

[theaceofarrows]

[Damian, Jason and Tim all putting up Thanksgiving decorations]

Damian: Has anyone seen Grayson? Didn't Pennyworth tell him to assist us in this meaningless task?

Jason: Ehh, I'm sure he's around here somew-

Dick: [kicking in the door of the room] 🎶Hey I just met you, and this is gravy, but here's my stuffing, so carve me maybe🎶

Tim: Oh, fuck no. Not again! [runs out of the room]

Jason: [covering his ears] Every fucking year!

Damian: Grayson! Cease this infernal racket at once!

Dick: Oh, come om Dami! Puns are my thing, I'm just being me. And you know what they say-

Jason: Shit NO-

Dick: I YAM who I YAM

Damian: Do NOT say another word-

Dick: In fact, you could say that I was just CORN this way

Damian: GRAYSON-

Dick: Really guys, I'm just trying to get the GOURD times rolling

Jason: Dickface, I swear if you so much as THINK about sayi-

Dick: [with a shit eating grin] If you think I'm done, you've got another thing STUFFING

[Damian and Jason both lunge at Dick]

-

[10 minutes later]

Tim: [dragging Bruce in] See?! Make it STOP! I can't take another year of this!

[Damian and Jason, screaming at and wrestling Dick while he continues to make Thanksgiving puns]

Bruce: [sigh] Every year. Every single year...

Tim: Do something with your problem sons. They're giving me a headache!

Bruce: [under his breath] Maybe I should have listened to Alfred about adopting so many kids...

Tim, Damian, Jason and Dick: WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!

Bruce: [tired sigh]