#ngl i love my children but i am getting kinda to the point where sometimes idk what to listen to bc I've heard them all too many times

[idon-twannabeperceived]

The only thing worse than keeping the same 5 to 10 albums on repeat is actually finding new music i like

[necesitotequila]

I was tagged by @magicalara, but started a new chain because it would’ve gotten too long.

1. Are you named after anyone?

Yes. My brother’s ex - kinda? When I was born, my brother, who was fourteen at the time, was giving my mum and dad name ideas. He replaced the "T" in his then-girlfriend’s name with "S", and that’s how he got "Sahira". They broke up messily and she’s kinda weird so I feel strange about it, ngl.

2. When was the last time you cried?

Can’t exactly recall when, but it was pretty recent… three or so days ago?

3. Do you have kids?

Nope. I’m definitely never having biological children, but I most probably won’t even have them in general.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Sometimes. But when I’m sarcastic, it’s the very obvious kind of sarcasm. I generally have trouble understanding sarcasm if it isn’t on the nose, so I hardly am sarcastic myself.

5. What sports do you play/have played?

I used to play tennis until the age of… fifteen or so? I really want to get back into it though it’s been a while. I also used to play football regularly and sometimes badminton, too. I really enjoyed swimming, but my technique needs a lot of polishing now. And I’m more of a gym person, tbh.

6. What’s the first thing you notice about a person?

Their face. Then the way they dress and their body language, I guess?

7. What’s your eye colour?

I’m not so sure myself anymore, lol. I think eyes are light brown with quite a lot of green and some gold in them - several people have pointed out that it shows when the sun hits them. However, though everyone I know says they must be hazel, my optician’s form says "light brown".

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Why not both?

9. Any special talents?

Writing, I think? And even if I do say so myself, I’m good at learning new languages.

10. Where were you born?

India.

11. What are your hobbies?

I enjoy reading, writing, playing guitar (started again after a long time), and

12. Do you have any pets?

Not at the moment, but I used to have a lot of fish and three cats.

13. How tall are you?

5’8 or 5’9 - not sure, lol.

14. Favourite subject in school?

I used to love history and English Lit, especially as my English teacher was amazing.

15. Dream job?

Although I sometimes doubt it, lawyer. If I wasn’t studying law, I’d probably be a historian or oceanologist (the ocean and history have been special interests I kept returning to since I was a child).

I tag: @pompompotato @elizaxspears @sigcorp @nullb1rdbones @roshytsunami @asgardianhobbit98 @scheherezhad and anyone else who wants to do this! No pressure 🥰

[nikethestatue]

I'm so sorry this will be long but I have to get rid of this to someone who understands me, your last post brought it all back up 🤧 (I apologize for any grammatical errors, english is not my native language)

Acosf got so much missing potential, I don't even know where to start... There are so many things that could have be done better

Nessian:

Where is the chemistry they already had in acowar? Where is the build up they already had? Why start at zero and make it all about s€x at the beginning. This one scene at the beginning where Cassian should bring Nesta to the river house and when Nesta then opens the door he first noticed her skinny appearance but then is stuck with her tatas like excuse me sir but your priorities are wrong right now 🤨. They had their cute, bonding and hot moments but it could be done better, there could be more. I think there is a reason many simping for Nesta × Eris when one dance had more sparkle than nearly half of the book.

Cassian himself:

That something i noticed only at my secound read because Acheron sisters >> bat boys so I focus more on them but yeah what about Cassian?? We learn nothing new about him and now this is a bit fronty but he sometimes gave me Wattpad Bodybuilder/Trainer vibes 😑 like where is our 500 years old Illyrian warrior, the general of the NC?

The plot (what plot?)

Do I have to say much about the pregnancy plot? like *🥲* You have already written a post or rebloggt i don't remember for sure which summarized it well. But you know what bothers me it could have been good. It was maybe a little fast because feyre has first said in acomaf she wanted to take her time but then came acofas where we have seen her wish for children (we are not talking about Rhys breeding kink💀😂). But why the fish was Feyre's pragnancy in Nessian pov?? I really like Feysand bonus chapter. Rhys crying from joy, they thinking about names and so going on. Cute moments between a couple becoming parents. Why make the pregnancy about Nesta? Why not showing us the joy and sorrow from Feysand's pov?

The blood rite was not better, ngl it was nice to read but glad that so many agree that it was unrealistic that they won. Would they have suvived, sure but win? No. The valkyries won against Illyrian who trained since childhood for the blood rite. Like okay how unrealistic you want to be?

The rest of the plot was basically training and fu€king so yeah 🤷‍♀️. The only aspect i found kinda interesting was the whole plot about the troves.

And when we at the plot,

Illyrian and the illyrian culture:

Two words: MISSED POTENTIAL. (and your post which is the reason i am writing this essay 😂💃) It is not like that we got a love interest who is Illyrian himself. Who suffered under the Illyrian but still wants to reform them, didn't give the hope up on them. Like we didn't get a woman as a friend of the MC who suffered under the Illyrian, who got her wings cut and was degrationed by them. Emerie my love don't get enough resignation. Like we didn't had Nesta training with the priestesses, why limit it only to them why not involve Illyrian women, why only train at HoW? Even why it was just the valkyries they could have made a statement while training in front of the Illyrian woman similar as Nesta did it at the libary to encourage the priestesses (and then they are not the Griel stans saying Az and G will reform the Illyrian like 😭 You know Az who hates the Illyrian and G who isn't quiet ready yet to leave the libary *me taking a breath* )

Nesta's healing jounary:

It was good but again it could have been better. Really i cried at the scene with Nesta and Cass at the lake, where she had her breakdown but there are some points i didn't quiet get. This are just my reading experiences but at the end it was not like she got to control her inner anger but it kind of just vanished like 20 years of rage just puff. Her healing jounary was at some points a bit fast in my eyes but to be fair Feyre had 3 books and Nesta only one.

The relationship between the Acheron sisters:

This is one point that makes me sad but it was disappointing how little bonding time between the sisters we got. Of course Nesta's monologe while saving Feyre was heartbreaking sweet and the end scene where Nesta is running towards her sisters with Nyx sleeping in Elain’s arms is lovely.(Both are one of my favourite scenes) But I wanted more. Where was the dialoge between the sisters? Where was the convertation why Nesta and Elain didn't help Feyre in the first book? Why was Nesta so nasty fowards Feyre?

And lean on that the the friendship between the Valkyries:

I really like their friendship, they all helped each other to heal.

But there's one little thing bothering me and i completly understand if someone disagree on that. This is again my reading experience. The Acheron sisters have a communication problem. I like the friendship between the three but it feels a bit like Emerie and Gwyn are replacement for Feyre and Elain. But to be fair i have kinda the same feeling when it comes to Feyre and the IC. Their found familes are somewhere replacements for their sisters because sisters are not able to talk slove their issues 🙈

(and now also your point that Nessian wouldn't work in canon. They are a modern AU couple and make no sense in canon. 😂🥲 But i still love them 😌)

I am sorry i jnow this was long but i have no one to talk about acotar in my friendgroup, lonely bookwurm here ☕️ plus in the acotar-fandom you need be careful where you criticise Acosf for many is this book the secound bible 💀😂.

If you made it this far, I just wanted to say I love your blog. You were one of the first Acotar blogs I followed back then. Love your posts and fics 💓✨️

Thank you and I pretty much agree with you on every point.

The complete decimation of Cassian as a character, the lack of any meaningful movement and change in the sisters' relationships, everyone communicates terribly, Rhys is an asshole, the IC are failures in just about everything, Amren should've been dead, the 'it's just sex' thing is dumb, NO ONE will ever convince me that Nesta is the kind of person who'd use sex as a coping mechanism.

Honestly, my expectation of a good Elain book, of Elain's character not being foolishly destroyed, is almost at zero. Unfortunately, I expect it to be horrible. Which is sad. Because SJM can write good books.

[allimili]

WHAT WHAT IS THIS?!??!?!?!?!? HELLO??? I AM OVER THE MOON- THIS IS SO- FROM START TO END OF THIS CHAPTER- I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT YOU MEANT WHEN YOU SAID THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE WILD AFTER SEEING MY LAST REBLOG ON THE PREVIOUS CHAPTER

My Darling Dolls AU : selfishness, hypocrisy and a contract.

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...

"*yawn... Morning." You greeted HiMERU as you wake up from your unconscious state after few days time.

"..."HiMERU look at you with a clear sight of eye bags in his eyes.

"HiMERU felt drained with problem you cause." He says as he show you endless text of Rinne second phone number about where you are and why are you not back yet.

"Your things." He give your own phone and turn it own to only have it ring endlessly by call coming from your boss, alkaloid batch as well Rinne and that weird ass kid before:

[THE GREAT LEO'S PRINTING PRESS:I wanna visit your place to write horror genre songs.but I saw that There's a weird thing in your front yard!! IT GIVES ME INSPIRATION!!]

[HIHIiro: HELLO!! WHERE ARE YOU. MAYONNAISE, AREA AND THAT SUSHI IS WORRIED] (A/N: he is not use to it, auto correct ruined his text]

[RinRin: WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY FEET PICS?! ANSWER ME THISSSSSSSS!!! YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME THIS EARLIER!!]

[IdolSimpAira: Do you wanna watch idol live concert? 🥺🥹 I have five tickets!]

...

[idolSimpAira: CRAZY B DID SOMETHING HORRIBLE!! I CANNOT FORGIVE THEM. CAN YOU HEAR ME OUT??😭]

... (insert Aira complaining about crazy b and him buying merchandise out of stress of the situation)

[Mayoi <3: MC, I would always help you if you need it. Please don't go asking to get hit by someone! VIOLENCE IS NOT THE ANSWER!!]

...

[HiHinata desu: oh the phantom have fallen ill again! Yuuta fallen ill too! MC! You shouldn't be reckless!! >:Tc now I also want to be asleep.]

You wonder what Hinata meant but it made you worry if his joking around again since he like to text prank you many times than being serious.

...

"...what's wrong with the front yard?" You wonder what that weird kid talks about.

"...ah. Amagi's younger brother accidentally order something weird from online after getting his own phone." HiMERU show you what it was.

"... Isn't that a Halloween props." You ask as you look at the ruined Chucky doll props at the front gate, impaled in the gate iron.

"They should have added blood running down the iron gate to make it more scary for other kids to look at." You thought about what it lack for a concept. The idol sigh as he realize your not a bit worried about it.

"Anyway I still don't know why I gone to childhood years instead at that time where kana meet such accident." You mumble.

"... Kid Kana is so cute Ùwú" you boosted as you stood up from the bed, almost losing balance as you have been laying there for a week and haft.

"Oopsie." You were lucky able to stop it when you hold at kaname bed which is beside yours.

You thought about the kaname you are with in your dream and the play that you guys joined in few years back, you hold his hand that have tube connected to him to supply him nutrition while being asleep.

"Dear sleeping beauty, when will you wake up?" You mumble feeling worried about how you'll get to the next time you'll try to time travel again. So far you don't see kaname gaining self aware that he could be someone like you.

He just call you Chuni (indirectly) when you keep telling him your from the future. Past mayoi would probably call you one too (in his mind at least)

"sleeping beauty huh..." HiMERU start. The two of you then chat how you should just kiss him awake and you debunk it by saying it's the filter Fairy tale.

Then it turn to lotto winning digits and being called another rinne. Almost went to an argument but later decided to go back to the house.

Through you did drop on a props store to buy fake blood to put in the front gate to maximize the effect of the wanna be Halloween theme the people in the house did.

When you two come back HiMERU excuse himself as he need to check on ES again for his idol work. "Mk. Bye." You said as you wave him off. You look at the chucky doll at the front gate before you open it. Walking inside the property, you notice how silent it is. You could almost felt someone is looking at you in every direction of open tainted windows.

"...is it Halloween or something." You mumble as you open the front door. As the door unlocked the sound it create made the people in the house all look at the direction.

"I would like to say if you suddenly go and surprised me out of nowhere I will dislocate a limb :)" you utter a joke to yourself or whoever is listening to you.

"MC!!!" You jolt in surprised when you hear the twins called out to you before they did an air flip and landing in front of you from what seems to be a hanging swing tied in the ceiling. "Welcome back ~ from dream land."

"what..." You wonder how they know.

"oh! Oh! MC don't know! Shall we tell them, Yuuta?" Hinata giggles to himself as he look at your oblivious situation.

"Eheh. Should we? Should we? But MC is a bad owner for being gone for days! Oh! How mean and heartless of them! We shouldn't!" Yuuta answered back to his brother with pout.

"... Shouldn't you guys be in ES boarding house? I wasn't worried being gone for a long while cause you all be doing idol stuff." You check their schedule they always put in the refrigerator and thought it was safe to leave for a couple of days to week even.

"how could we do that ~ we only fallen asleep out of nowhere if we're out! Cause MC Is a bad owner!! Now we're dub Ritsu sakuma the #2 and the #3!" Yuuta complained as he poke your nose.

"bully MC but not physically! Meany! Meany!"-Hinata

"bad! Bad! Bad owner!" -Yuuta

The twins called you names and you just chuckle as you walk into the house. You look at the couch and saw someone looking at you with burning gaze.

"Yes? Are you also going to say something, hiiro?" You ask the batch leader of Alkaloid. Who is eyeing since you come in yet never spoken anything.

"MC, I wanted to ask where you gone too but Aira and Tatsumi said you have your own life outside from us. But I hope you'll tell us next time if you'll leave for a long while." He said on seriousness. "Plus since you leave, mayoi won't leave that room and always asleep. " He added.

Somehow you wonder why he said mayoi is also sleeping.

"...!!" You heard something upstairs, you look up and saw familiar long purple hair of someone running away fearing to be seen.

"MAYOI <3" you smiled as you wave to hiiro to talk to him more later on as he seems to still want to talk to you. You then run upstairs in chase to follow the phantom to his hiding spot.

You climb up to hear him closing the door, you smirk as you give chase and follow him to the door.

"HERES MC!!" you says as you open the door.

"Mayoi~.... Eh." You saw no one inside. "did I enter the wrong room?" You mumble as you walk inside and the door close behind you, your focus in the scene before you to notice the person your looking for is behind you hidden behind the door.

Without even making a sound he slowly approaches you from behind, his face hidden away, unable to determine what his current feeling.

"I'm bad at this..." You grumble as you still don't notice him.

"Are you mad? Where are you?" You called out.

"Yes, but do I have the right to be mad?" You heard someone says behind you.

"Mayoi--" you happily turn around and was about to hug him when he went to the side to dodge your attempt.

"MC..." You could hear his voice in the Verge of crying.

"...saying sorry for making you worry is not the way to fix this isn't it?" Realizing that mayoi isn't going to desire his words and worry to be taken as nothing anymore.

You stared at the cards in your hand, wondering what kind of action you'll do to give him a reassurance that such event wont happen again but that woukd be lying.

You plan to continue till Kana will wake up and already thinking how to be in such position again to gain access to the past. Even it means hidding things to the people who entered your life and cared for you like a family would.

You been hidding many things from him for a while now, keeping your problem to yourself again when you can openly says those when it's just the two of you. Because you only have one another.

"yes it could fix it... As I'm just someone who you won't listen too. You treat me as someone special and important yet you would not hear me out when I'm worried about you... "His left hand grip his right arm, shoulder shaking as he lower his face to not be seen for any expression his emotion is under going on such moment.

"*Hic... Sorry maybe I have no such status in your life. I could only listen to you... Do you hate me now that I'm not a doll who could easily be discarded --" you saw tears fall down, wetting the rag in the process through you can never see his eyes full of grief.

you felt sadness, grief, hopelessness and pain as well guilt. Somehow those emotion don't felt like yours. "Mayoi--..."you reach out to him.

Wanting to say something and hug his pain away "NO! I--.. N-nO... I-if y-you...t-touch m-me and s-say warm yet heartless words y-you... M-make me unable to d-do anything.... *Hic... *Sob... Am I useless... To be lean on your p-problem now...?" He fallen to his knees as tears continue to fall, pouring like raindrops and emotions that made you suffocate like drowning in a lake of hopelessness and grief.

Lake that once a beautiful garden of happiness and warmth slowly flooded by the rain of negativity that very moment you stopped connecting to him, through sometimes the lake would become happy place again when you only have him in your eyes, through it's just illusion he keep the voices in his mind that start to speak when he become human. Because you have many people with you now.

'ah... How ugly for someone like me to wish for old times...' he thought now true to himself. He does wish to meet his friends, you having warm big family that would share laughters, care for one another and love that you never fully experienced as a young unfortunate child, that only have him in your life.

"... Humans are selfish people. We live for our own selfishness. Even if we said we wish for other people sake of happiness, in the end of day we only did such thing because that's what make us happy." You don't try to approach him anymore. You look around the room, to the window and to the walls. "I'm. Human and I'm selfish. I would continue to do something stupid again because seeing kana wake up would make me happy... Even it mean your going to be mad at me, hate me and whatnot... I don't want you too. But I did it to myself if you did so one day..."

" Because the moment you become human like me. You'll realize the very moment we meet I'm very selfish and only cared for people who give me value in life and never myself at least I care enough to be happy in small moments." You thought about it, many things you did are very stupid, even if you think of the consequences five steps ahead of the others.

You would hit and harm your classmates for bullying mayoi way before he show his conscious state. A simple odd looking toy in the eyes of others is more important than their judgement or their life.

Even it mean being thrown out to another place, unable to start a firm root in one place yet when others says bad words about you. You play deaf.

"...*hic..." You heard him whimpering. "I'm actually happy you have become human. Because you can be free to do what you want, you can be a beautiful star with your brilliant comrades. And maybe forget about me."

"you ask me to not abandoned you or to leave you. Which I'll do because I'm happy as long your happy... But such promise doesn't include that I cannot make you abandoned me. Ah .. that felt terrible to say!" You giggle. "Especially from me who hate being thrown away! Humans are hypocrite! I'm hypocrite! Because I am complicated human being~" you turn to look at him and seat in front of him. You don't know how crazy you sound like or look like in his eyes. But it doesn't matter, as emotions you keep inside pour out like leaking faucet.

"So I would continue to do something you'll be mad about through not because I want you to hate me ... Not yet at least. Because it make happy to see kana my second reason to continue living to wake up. And to experience people worry about my will being. I'm a greedy person. I never experienced such emotions from other people.

"Ah .. people from that place would laugh at me...! Because they wish for a human that won't feel such flows to only be bland and normal yet perfect in every way as possible-- a perfect human without flows. But sadly I am human. And human have flows... " You felt your throat dry from speaking too much. "Mayoi being mad is so cute... ~ 💕" You added after observing him.

"... Since I am like you... A human. Won't you entertained me for my selfishness?" His tears have long dried up. He look at you with no hate or loath.

His gaze with only you in his beautiful blue eyes leads you to question if your words are good or not. Or your awaken something bad on him... Or maybe you just triggered something that once in a dormant state to be awaken.

But seeing him smile as he awaits your reply.

You can never judge him at all. Because mayoi is mayoi. Whatever the world's says about him, rude or bad, they could only get a middle finger and iron fist from you if those words become physical pain.

"if you wish for me to stop. I won't. But if it don't include that. I won't mind." You smile, not because of hypocrisy or that you felt insanity like how you speak those words earlier about what you felt you are as a human being but because speaking to mayoi about what you felt heavy burden inside made you, realize you felt relief after long time like old times.

"MC won't be happy if I said that won't you?" He smiled. "I won't ask for such thing that would make you sad. Even so it made me grief and worry..." He slowly lean his head against you and arms securing you in his captivity.

'Oh how he wish to keep you for himself!' he thought as the voices in his head seems to calm down when he felt your warmth.

"I will Help you... If you need to gain access to the past again... That's what you been doing right...?" You froze before you chuckle as you circle your arms around him and give him a tight hug.

"Yes, that's what I been doing..." You mumble. "But how would you help me~? Can you land a punch...?" You jested.

"my body might be human but I will never stopped being the phantom." He you felt his voice right beside your ears, it made you felt chill which made you giggle. Red tint in your face hidding it from his view as you burry your face in the crock of his neck and shoulder blade.

"Sorry I never understand what phantom thing is..." You felt hopeless, as you never understand why other seems to fear Mayoi or baseless rumors that surrounded him since long ago.

"It's ok... It's better you'll don't understand. I fear you'll fear me--"

"I won't even if others calls you monster or bad omen or bad person. Mayoi is mayoi. My precious mayoi."

"ah... MC... Those voices in my head suddenly come back again, if you say sweet nothing. " You felt his hold on you tighten.

"I don't know if I can stop myself to do what they say..." He let out a low chuckle that held a threat yet it felt tickle against your skin.

"What do they say, mayoi?' you ask.

"...to bind you to a contract and lock you away~ away from everyone who could steal you... Ah... MC my thought are disgusting aren't they?" he giggle.

"It's fine. It's because your human like me. Being human is complicated isn't it?" You hummed. "Hmm.. contract... I heard of it from Aoi twins. If the voices of your head wish for me to be under one to reassure you. I won't mind. " Your a selfish human being, even if such words supposed to be a red flag. You don't mind, you don't mind granting his selfish wish. Because mayoi would be happy and it makes you happy as long it don't go against your plan with kana's current situation.

"... R-really? You'll do that without even knowing the pros and cons? Ahh~ MC! My sole grace in this world... You don't know how that make the voices in my head happy, how it makes me happy...!!! Because if your in a contract with me. You'll be fully mine... all of you..." His smile adoringly at you, his eyes show twisted sense of obsession and love, his face that have red warm blush across his face, warm like his feeling right now, the moment you said such words it gives him so much happiness, the voices in his head is beaming with joy with him. Yet it become tearful, hopelessness of sadness as he realize how ugly he might be in your eyes.

" *Hic... M-my thought surging with my emotions makes me felt I'm the lowest of the low but I don't care... You a-also...w-won't care, right??" He leans away, eyes spinning with spiral of beyond the boundary of what's right, gaze upon you.

Cherishing hold your cheeks in between his palms, with close distance between the two of you.

You can felt his breath and felt his heartbeat against your chest. The surging emotions pour down like rain in a drought desert.

"hmm.. as long mayoi is happy..." You nodded.

"Ah~ I love you so much~ it's sickening! N-not you! But me!" He says with corrupted mind. You suddenly felt something weird as if you felt thread slowly tying into you, yet you see nothing particularly wrong with you.

"...I love mayoi too <3 " you said with full of honest.

"I know... I am human because of your love." Your hugged by him. He smiled against you. He felt so happy at the memories, with the warmth that you'll only give him and only him.

"A sicko, like me is the one who gain such happiness and great fortune to be able to meet you before others did... I won't let you go.. I cannot...! I'm sorry I cannot abandoned or hate you... Ah... MC... " He pause, he lean away again to look at you in your (color) eyes. His gaze at you like your above what Mades him be in this world, blue star or his dollmaker, or god...! "Your imperfections is nothing but perfect in my eyes. Your my angel, my beloved human... I will die if you die. I will be sick if your sick. I will share your pain and your happiness." You wonder what he meant as you felt his telling a secret he hides from you.

"You cannot escape me... "Mayoi words felt like a curse. He lead his head against your chest, kiss the place above your beating heart since your wearing a type of cloths that have could easily unbutton his lips glaze against your chest, you felt slight burning sensation as invisible thread tying a knot to lock you in place. Yet you saw nothing with your naked eyes. You just saw Mayoi happily looking at you.

"If you did... I am a human... I won't be question if I listen to the voices of my head for the things I'll do if you did... " He giggle, which reminded you that if you regret anything later, it's all on you as you will let him be selfish. "What's that?"

"ahaha... I will not tell unless you did such horrible thing that would cause you to endangered your life... Our life."

"...ah. "somehow things start to click in place. The text of his and the twins words that felt weird as it's like they experience what you experience. "Did you..." You sigh hopelessly. You have heard of darling dolls who can wish for anything even it's beyond sane, once in their life.

"that's right! My MC shouldn't be reckless, unless you wish to drag two innocent darling dolls and my life to the grave with you~ <3"

You realize your particularly being threatened by mayoi yet you realize and thought in your head; Thats fuck up like really bad. But that's kinda hot. Maybe red is my color. :^)

Your deranged, both of you are. But it's fine. Your aren't one that would listen to society normalize protocol for sanes humans.

A/N: if you read MDD AU MINI CORNER DEAR SLEEPING BEAUTY. Your awaken before CH3 starts. You been asleep for 1week and haft in present time btw. Hopefully I don't over did it with the background and way of thoughts of MC--you. I just thought humans are complicated (like me and people around me) so I just did that.

TAG LIST : @allimili @valeriele3

[frogtanii]

hq boys as the crimes they’d commit

warnings: CRIMES, crackfic, probably many typos idk i’m so tired lmaooo, cursing, drinking ??? idfk 😩💦

an: and i did this for what?? inspired by hq hcs royalty @sugardaddykenma @hina-wit-da-glock (AJSKSJ SORRY FOR TAGGING Y’ALL IF YOU SEE THIS, IT IS DEF NOT UP TO PAR W Y’ALLS WORKS ILY)

karasuno

sawamura daichi- insurance fraud!! somehow this is such a dad crime to commit?? dadchi didn’t try (dumb excuse, how do you accidentally commit insurance fraud smh) to commit insurance fraud but at one point in his late-thirties, he was very very broke and was already working as much as possible so, he decided to fake an ankle injury, as you do, and filed a bunch of claims which made him bank. daichi kept doing it until he was able to quit one of his jobs and buy himself a really nice suit and a rolex (uhhh 🥵). he somehow never got caught tho and to this day, none of his friends know how he was able to afford a tesla on a cop’s salary (sorry daichi but acab 😔✨)

sugawara kōshi- child abandonment!! ok you can try and fight me on this but i feel in my bones that suga absolutely despises children. he can tolerate ages 10+ but anything younger than that, he will punt them into the next dimension. the thing is, people just assume he likes kids because of how good he is with his team which is why his aunt begged him to babysit his nephew taro. taro was being an absolute brat when suga took him out for the day and he was 👉👈 this close to snapping. he put taro down for like 3 seconds to pay for their ice cream and when he turned back, the demon spawn was gone. he panicked, running around the park looking for taro when it turns out, taro was just bent down behind the bench. some random karen called the police and suga has never craved murder more.

nishinoya yuu- arson!! you CANNOT tell me nishinoya doesn’t have a ~murder~ playlist that he listens to to get himself hype (me too noya, me too). one night, he got a lil too hype listening to start a riot by duckwrth and watching demolition videos on youtube. he snuck out of his house to an empty shed like 30 minutes away and maybe... lit it on fire while genocide by lil darkie played on a speaker nearby. what he did NOT anticipate was the absolute size of the fire so he freaked out and called the firefighters who promptly called the police. he didn’t want to get grounded so he called daichi to bail him out. daichi still told noya’s parents 😔.

tanaka ryūnosuke- vandalism!! tanaka had been on alt tiktok and saw a group of cool friends spray painting an abandoned building. he thought “that’s cool, lemme do that!” but then he realized he had no friends (AHDGS JK I LOVE TANAKA). he asked nishinoya who was grounded from the arson incident and he knew he definitely couldn’t ask daichi, suga, asahi, or enoshita so he decided to go it alone. that proved to be a MASSIVE mistake. he got the supplies, arrived to the building of his choice (thanks saeko :3), and decided to spray paint a huge p3ni5 in bright red paint. he finished “successfully” and zoomed back home. what he didn’t realize with his two-and-a-half braincells is that he signed his glorious piece with his full name. the cops were at his house the next morning...🧍

hinata shoyō- forgery!! hinata did NOT think that forgery was even a crime. how was he supposed to know that he wasn’t allowed to copy his mom’s signature on a permission form! all he wanted was to go to an overnight training camp 😿

kageyama tobio- attempted murder!! kageyama swears it sounds worse than was and he is absolutely incorrect. what happened was so much worse. he and hinata were having a competition to see who could hold their breath the longest underwater (you can’t tell me they haven’t done some dumbass shit like this) and kageyma lost almost instantly (he has the tiny lungs of an asthmatic). he didn’t want hinata to notice so he held hinata’s head under the water for like 10 seconds. suga walked in though, saw hinata thrashing around in the water and immediately called the police. kageyama never forgave him.

tsukishima kei- cyberbullying!! first of all, i had no idea you could get arrested for cyber bullying!? that being said, neither did tsukishima who spent 80% of his time making fun of people online (and on his real account!! bold). eventually one of the people he bullied (hinata) reported him on instagram and his very lame account was deleted (pls don’t bully people online 😤).

yamaguchi tadashi- shoplifting!! andjksh this is so funny because this scenario has happened to me and i can just SEE this happening to poor tadashi. yamaguchi gets super late night cravings (and usually tsukki will walk with him at like 3 am 🥺 nEWAYS) so he’ll sneak out and walk to the mini-mart near his house. one night, he was so tired but also super hungry so he went onto his nightly routine and basically sleepwalked into the store. he picked out his favorite chips and candy bar (which are sour cream&onion lays and milky ways in case you were wondering 😌✨) and just... walked out the store without paying. the store clerk was mysteriously missing so yamaguchi made it all the way home, ate half the bag of chips and passed out without realizing what he’d done. once he did, he cried for 2 hours straight.

nekoma

kuroo tetsurō- telemarketing fraud!! kuroo originally did telemarketing fraud as a joke?? like he was trying to prank call someone pretending that they had lost their information and they actually gave it to him??? he was mildly concerned but even more excited. he did it over and over again but he never used the info for anything. to this day, kuroo literally has a notebook full of credit card numbers and bank account passwords but he refuses to use it because he believes it’s ✨wrong✨(but it isn’t wrong to take all that information in the first place under false pretenses, not realizing that once people find out, they are forced to close credit cards and accounts but go off self righteous king). once he brought the book up to kenma and he offered to sell it on the dark web. now kuroo feels less bad about what he’s done! :D

kozume kenma- computer crime!! pfttt this one seems kinda obvious but what do you expect from kenma :). he spends so much time on the internet, he’s definitely picked up some less than legal skills that still help him now 👀. kenma did little mini crimes like getting into other people’s wifi but his crowning achievement was when he hacked into the minneapolis pd website and had it so when you opened the page, a black lives matter screen came up. he never told anyone that it was him who did it but he thinks it’s the best he’s ever done.

yaku morisuke- racketeering!! yaku, the feral king, ran an underground gambling ring in the basement of nekoma (do they have basements?? who knows! i don’t!) during his third year. the only reason it didn’t get shut down was because coach nekomata took a portion of yaku’s profits whenever he won (which was literally all the time). everyone on the team has lost money to him which is why they never play with him anymore. they won’t even let yaku play monopoly 😔.

haiba lev- indecent exposure!! poor lev’s head is so empty, he tends to fall for whatever pranks his senpai’s do to him. this time kuroo had somehow convinced him that in order to grow his schlong, he had to run outside naked for 10 minutes because the moonlight had special growing properties. lev was a lil scared ngl because he was already superrr tall and didn’t need to grow his height (or his dick ((boy is hung)) but poor lev is insecure) but he did it anyway. long story short, an old woman saw him parading around the neighborhood naked and called el policia. 0/10 dick did NOT grow and had to spend a night in jail naked 😿

aoba johsai

oikawa tōru- prostitution!! KAKKAKA iwazumi made fun of oikawa for being so shitty and said that he couldn’t pick up anyone if he tried. flattykawa took this as a personal challenge and went out onto the street, asking people if they’d have sex with him. with the way he was asking (and the way he was dressed), people assumed he was a paid w h o r e and someone eventually reported him. iwazumi had to pick oikawa up from the station- he never let him live this one down.

iwaizumi hajime- battery!! it wasn’t technically battery but oikawa is a lil bitch and overreacts (at least in his words -_-). the amount of times iwa-chan has beat the absolute shit out of oikawa is uNREAL. he just can’t handle the stupidity sometimes so he just smacks the crap outta him. not for real for real but the way oikawa reacts, you’d think a murder was occurring. one time, shittykawa screeched so loud, they got a noise complaint -_- hajime hates it in these streets.

matsukawa issei & hanamaki takahiro- conspiracy!! issei and hiro have a secret blog where they discuss conspiracy theories and such but one day, hiro found an article that explained how jfk’s death was an inside job. he sent it to issei who began to theorize how HE’D do it. that devolved into a massive thread on their blog of how’d they murder a president which blew up and caught the attention of the cia who sent the a letter telling them to quietly delete the blog. they did because they were terrified but they kept the letter and now it’s framed in issei’s apartment.

kyōtani kentarō- assault!! baby is an angry little boy but for all the right reasons. he was at a bar (when he’s all grown up, duh) and he spotted an absolute drunk creep hitting on a girl who clearlyyyy did not reciprocate his feelings. kyōtani, being the respectful king that he is, went over to the guy, pulled him by the jacket and beat. the. shit. out of him. while the bartender was happy with the fact that the creep was out, he was not impressed with the damage to his bar. he just sent kyōtani out who casually adjusted his leather jacket and rings, and hopped on his motorcycle to ride away into the night. i am the FATTEST simp for this man ONG 🥴

shiratorizawa

ushijima wakatoshi- stalking!! poor ushijima has no idea how intimidating he can be. he was on a train late at night after practice and the woman sitting across from him left her purse sitting on the seat. being the gentleman that he is, he took the purse and followed her to return it. the only problem is that the closer he got, the faster she ran and when he tried to speak (yknow with his scary, deep, baritone voice), the woman screeched and called the cops on him because he was a “strange, big man who was following her home.” when the police showed up, ushijima was painfully confused and just held up this tiny ass purse in his massive hands. the cops laughed.

tendō satori- ???!! no one knows what crimes (or how many 😳) tendō has committed but each of his teammates have different ideas- ushijima: “i don’t believe tendou is capable of committing any sort of felony. well, maybe murder”; semi: “of COURSE he’s capable of crimes??! do you know how many times i’ve seen him come into the dorm with a suspicious stain of red on his sweater?? *shudders* if i end up dead, tendō did it...” in actuality, the only crime tendō has committed is ~drugs~ but he’s not bouta tell his friends that.

goshiki tsutomu- would be a VICTIM!! my baby tsutomu would NEVER commit a crime!!! i love this man with my everything and the only crime he’s committed is being too damn cute 😤🥺

[normal-thoughts-official]

I LOVE LOVE LOVE YOUR BEAUTY AND THE BEAST IDEA. But may I also propose: Magnus cursed from a young age (probably bc of Asmodeus) that anyone who touches him is hurt by a blast of magic he can't control. (This may result in his mother's death). He locks himself away of his own will. Alec teaches then that it's fear that makes him lash out. Featuring: touch starved Magnus.

this idea is GENIUS actually and i love it. tbh me and my friend have a similar idea that we talk to each other about (lol) but it isn't a B&B thing, its more of an adventure AU. anyway, lets go!

so in this universe i guess magnus banished asmodeus like in the original sh verse but asmodeus cursed him with the "everyone you touch will be in indescribable pain" thing. maybe just as revenge, maybe to try and use it as bargaining chip because okay magnus, is it freedom that u want? u want to be able to have ur own friends and ur own life? fine. get me back, and ill leave u alone, and ull be free to have friends again. if not, ull be still isolated just like before. so is it gonna be win-win, or lose-lose?

but magnus doesn't budge because he knows that if he lets asmodeus free things will only get worse not only for him, but for the whole world. he is too dangerous to be out there. so, magnus resigns to his fate

and i guess in this version he wouldnt have a lot of close friends because he had been with asmodeus his whole life before he was cursed, so he was just. alone in his self-imposed isolation with no one to talk to. maybe he enchants the furniture so they gain sentience but they can't really feel pain, so at least he has someone to talk to. god im so fucking sad already

so is the furniture his friends in canon? im not entirely sure how i feel about that but also the idea of ragnor as that clock from the original movie is great. thats my most important thought on the subject ngl

btw its 4 degrees Celsius in here so im typing with gloves on so ull have to excuse my typos i am a mere brazilian and i want death

anyway okay so i guess his friends are like pieces of furniture that he spelled into sentience and they aren't his servants or anything cuz that's gross but they just like, hang out. wow im actually managing to type pretty well all things considered

so at least magnus has people to talk to but he's still touch starved because you know... a clock can't hug you and that'd just be weird. maybe them becoming sentient was an accident? lmao like magnus just wanted to automate some functions like having the clock talk to tell him the time or something and it turned out that they became sentient. possibly his magic is a little fucky because of the curse so that's why that happened? or maybe he just is way more powerful than he realizes and we all know he invented the spells he used to try and automate the things anyway. but if he gets people to talk to, well, he's not complaining

im focusing too much on this. anyway. id also like to note that im making rapha the cook/stove thing because i mean, come on. it's right there

and ok i guess alec comes into this because he uhhhhhh no u know i might go with that izzy thing. so izzy ran away from home because of maryse's bullshit and alec was sent to bring her back. so he was going after her but in the middle of the path there was the whole wolf attack thing that scared off his horse and LUCKILY magnus' house/tower/whatever was right next!!! so of course they take alec and his horse in but also WHOOPS there's a huge snowstorm that lasts for days (par the course for where magnus lives, actually. he DID want somewhere people would avoid. but also i think maybe his magic being fucky has something to do with it) so i guess alec is stuck at magnus' for the foreseeable future

which is HELL for magnus because he is terrified out of his mind that they will accidentally touch and alec will be hurt. and like.... his Constant Crave For Touch is already bad on a regular day, but having someone who could actually hug him in theory just makes it worse, you know? he hasn't interacted with other human beings in so long, just having one there is enough to make his need for touch almost unbearable and just... completely constant. it's hell

so magnus is scared, which means that he keeps to himself. so he tells alec not to go into his room, he tries not to eat at the same time, and other stuff like that, bUT his friends keep sabotaging his plans because they want him to have another friend, jesus christ!! (rapha being like "come on now magnus, you don't want my soup to get cold, do you? i'll be deeply offended. i guess you have no choice but to eat with alec". so magnus goes but the first thing he does is magic his regular table into a gigantic rectangular table with 41908410 seats and seat on on the side opposite to alec. alec just sighs

so like he's constantly coming across as rude because he is trying to avoid alec, alec just doesn't know why

but alec is also a stubborn bitch who goes stir crazy and refuses to just sit around isolated doing nothing while they wait for the stupid storm to finally be over so he can go get his sister. and magnus saved his life, so it's the least he can do to repay him in some way. besides, this is what, the first time that he's been completely away from his mom? for such a long time too? and he's finding that he feels... weirdly free and just relieved and he doesn't want to waste that opportunity with standing idly around alone all day. he had enough of that at home, thank you very much

besides yeah magnus is being rude but alec is used to straight up assholes and abusers (jace. i'm talking about jace. also maryse ofc but mostly jace) and magnus is not that. in fact he makes very polite conversation and is actually pretty fun during dinner, all things considered. he's just.... super private, i guess

AND magnus' friends are all being a nightmare with the making them interact so you know. they end up interacting. and alec makes it a point to help him take care of his house because it is a certified Depression Lair™. magnus can take care of it magically but it's like... so dark and almost suffocating at times and there is stuff like bad painting and piping problems that he never bothered to fix because it isn't affecting the functionality too much but it DOES makes life harder and alec "everything must be at 100% always" lightwood is not here for it so for a few days they are working on fixing the house and... magnus actually feels a lot better when the place has actual sunlight and looks inviting and like a home, he has to admit. when he says that to alec it might be the first time he's given him a real smile and man, is alec smitten

sidenote i guess this means that magnus doesn't exactly... dress well in this au lmaoo i mean it makes sense too because canonically magnus uses dressing up as a way to convey an image of power and untouchability and he doesn't really need that in this AU since he is completely isolated. so i guess he is a bit more like twi magnus - bare-faced and wearing comfortable clothes and the like. this isn't a twi au i'm just saying that it makes more sense for him to dress like that in that context

anyway. after the whole house fixing thing, they officially become friends. it turns out that alec also knows a bit about what it's like to feel isolated and touch-starved (altho he's always had izzy to help in that department, but still) and also what crappy parents are like. magnus shows alec his little mirror that he's enchanted to be able to show him anything he wants and how he uses it to be able to see all the places in the world he'd like to visit - he loves people, he loves culture, and sometimes it's all he can do to watch what's going on in Mumbai and it makes him feel a little better, so, he does that. he also admits that sometimes he catches on some drama happening and uses the mirror to see the people involved and make sure they are okay. kinda like a soap opera of his own but he has the means to interfere and help because of magic, so he will have someone who's struggling with money suddenly find hidden cash or have an "unknown dead relative" give them a lot of money in their will, or something like that. and if he also watches some of their personal drama that unfolds, well. he is lonely and it's not hurting anyone

but magnus doesn't tell him about the curse, and he still makes sure to keep his distance. it stings a little to alec, but it hurts magnus the most because fuck, maybe he just desperately needs someone who will give him the time of day, but he likes this guy and that only makes it harder to keep his distance. he makes it a point to always be at at least two arms length from alec, which alec thankfully respects and doesn't try to get him to breach, but. shit. it's still so hard to not want to just rest his head on his shoulder or get a hug or even fucking touch pinkies like stupid children and he can't. alec even once jokingly suggests that they have a ball since magnus doesn't know how to dance and magnus is actually excited for a second before he remembers that he can't, it would have to mean that alec touches him, and he can't

someone - maybe ragnor - even suggests that maybe he could try gloves and heavy clothing so alec isn't really touching him but magnus refuses to try because he doesn't want to risk it not working and alec getting hurt, because he'd never forgive himself. besides, getting a taste would only make it hurt more. he can't. he can't

but it's alright because at least he has some human company - he loves his friends, he does, fiercely, but it's different when they kind of have no choice but to be with him and also are enchanted creatures. he doesn't even know if they aren't nice to him just because he enchanted them into life, even tho to be fair if he had a choice ragnor wouldn't be that grouchy - and alec makes him laugh and gets him and helped make his place feel more like home, a little bit. and he can pretend that he feels the warmth from alec's body when they are sitting by the fire and feed these crumbs to his desperate need for touch and company

and then the snowstorm ends and it's time for alec to go

honestly, alec himself is kind of heartbroken, but- he loves his sister, and he can't just leave her alone in god knows where, even if he dreads the thought of coming back home now that he's been away from his family for so long. but magnus doesn't want to keep him, and doesn't want alec to feel pity for him, so he's all but pushing alec out of the door (not literally, of course. he can't do that, it would mean touching him) all "go, go, you never know when another storm might start. go see your sister. take my mirror, you can find her more easy". and alec's all "but it's been the only thing-" and magnus waves him off, of course, all "i can always make myself another one. besides, you'll have something to remember me by. now go"

so.... alec goes

and hooo boy magnus is heartbroken and a mess because even tho he knew how much having someone else there helped he had almost forgotten what it was like to be the only human in the house. he just feels extra lonely and even kind of bad about it because hey, his friends are there - not that they begrudge him for it, of course. it's not like they don't also hope for the chance to get out of the house and do other things, but well. they can't. so they understand him. and they know how awful he's feeling right then, but what can they do?

meanwhile alec finds izzy pretty quickly - she's living with this one insufferable villager named clary that alec absolutely can't stand, but- she's happy. and she doesn't want to come back, which alec expected, but he finds that he can't actually insist for her to come back. how could he, when he himself doesn't want to go?

and izzy insists that he stays with her - there's no reason for him to come back. they can stay in the village, and work, and build a life for themselves. alec is the only thing she's been missing ever since she left, and in here the both of them can actually be happy. and do it together, like they're meant to

and when he first gets into the village is the first time since izzy ran away that he was hugged and fuck, it's hard to say no to her

but also... he misses magnus already

and he doesn't know if he can just stay and leave him behind

and of course izzy is like "who is magnus?" so alec tells her the story, how he was attacked by wolves and rescued by this house that miraculously was in the middle of the single most inhospitable placealec had ever seen in his life. and the kind but wary stranger who always keeps his distance but seems so eager for connection, who made alec feel welcome and laugh and feel like he built a life for himself there

and clary tells him that she's heard of the story, but she never knew it was more than a legend - no one really remembers what happened. some say that magnus made a sacrifice to rid the village of a demon, and it turned him into a beast, forever locked in his castle. some say that he himself is the demon, and it's the tower that's containing him and keeping the village safe. some even say that he died battling the demon, and it's his ghost that keeps watch on the tower

she wants alec to explain which one is true, but it's all alec can say that none of these are right and he knows nothing because magnus never told him. all alec knows is that he doesn't want to leave magnus behind

and clary is like... well, if he's not a demon or a ghost, maybe we could bring him to the village too. he has magic, right? he could bring the tower closer. and maybe the other villagers could, you know, visit him and hang out. and he wouldn't be as lonely, and then alec and izzy could both stay

driven by this failproof plan, they decide to go back to magnus and tell him their great idea

except they are IDIOTS and forget about. you know. the damn wolves

and like holy shit is this pack big or what? like no seriously why are there infinite wolves in that one singular pack in beauty and the beast. like holy shit dude there's more wolves near the beast's house than in the whole yellowstone park

anyway there are Many Wolves and while alec is a good archer, izzy is a fantastic fighter, and clary is Fucking Crazy if you give her something stabby, there's only so many wolves they can take on at the same time

good thing magnus is a pining idiot who did in fact make himself another magic mirror and was watching alec with it. so he knows that the dumbass is in trouble and for the first time in years, he uses the portal (his own invention, and he had never gotten to use it before!) to get to them and fight off the wolves

so magnus saves all their lives, at the cost of getting severely injured and passing the fuck out. izzy, who's the one closest, runs to get to him and help put him on one of their horses... and is immediately hit by a blast of magic that almost makes HER pass tf out too

which is when they finally learn that, oh. that is the curse

izzy is fine, of course - the pain ended as soon as she was away from magnus

but it does pose the problem of How The Fuck Are They Getting Him Back To Safety, because they can't exactly wait for magnus to wake up (it's freezing, for starters) but with this amount of pain it won't be physically possible for them to hoist him up and get him on the horse. shit, will the curse work on the horse?

they bring alec's horse (by far the strongest of them because alec is huge buff mcgee) and try to get him to touch magnus and the spell does NOT work on the horse because in order to be dramatic asmodeus was like "you shall never feel human touch again" when he cast the spell, which accidentally gave a LOOPHOLE for non-human animals. so magnus could have had cats the whole time, which he had always dreamed of, but he didnt want to risk testing. besides, his house would be a poor environment for a cat and [self torture noises]

anyway thats one less problem to deal with, 99 to go, so they use some ropes to hoist magnus on top of the horse and bring him back to the tower (it's closer than the village) so they can tend to his wounds. thankfully, as the assigned Big Brother of a very irresponsible izzy, alec has experience with first aid, altho he never really dealt with anything quite this bad. and magnus' friends help, too, as much as they can. inevitably this means that alec ends up touching him even if by accident sometimes, but he knows what to expect so he Powers Through It because he won't let magnus die, damn. and as horrible as that is alec has experience with powering through pain, so. he's gonna bandage him up god damn it

izzy can't stand to see him dealing with that himself tho, so she helps, and clary ends up helping as well because they figure sharing the pain makes it easier and alec doesn't have to be too hurt. minimal touching accidents for alec! good

*narrator voice* And Then Magnus Wakes Up And Alec Hugs Him

full on launches on top of him and brings him into his arms and Magnus screams like NONONO OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING ALEC NO GET OFF ME YOU'LL BE HURT and his shock and distress at the whole thing sends another whole blast of magic that explodes that whole mf before it can touch alec and alec feels no pain and magnus is like.............. did i just COUNTER the spell? and everyone's like well! it looks like u did!

which earns him ANOTHER hug (oh my god alec stop he's so stressed out by this) (who knew alec was so touchy?) and this time he's paying attention to that gut reaction and because magnus is a Certified Magic Genius he realizes what it is that he's doing to counter the spell and immediately starts working on a way to turn this into unhexxing himself for good

which he DOES after some time idk how long but alec stays with him meanwhile and maybe izzy and clary do too, because magnus needs all the company he can get and besides, izzy has always wanted adventure and clary has never left the village before, so this is interesting to them at least. and magnus gets to meet new ppl which is nice

eventually the Begone Spell spell is performed and it works and turns out that when it does that it also unfucks magnus' magic and perfects his sentience spell turning all of his friends into humans WOW WHOD HAVE THOUGHT. so all of them are free to leave the tower as ppl at the same time and GROUP HUG!! and magnus cries like a baby in the group hug because holy shit hes been needing something like this so bad for so long and he never expected to have that with his friends but here he is :)

and then yeah they all move to the village to live a simple but fulfilling life and Magnus and Alec start living together in a little cottage and become husbands the end <3 this is so long too rip me

[cow-i-guess]

I really don't think it's out of character. It has been confirmed by the crew that Chat being isolated and left out is leading to something and a lot of the fandom have been speculating about Ladybug and Chat conflict. So this episode shows his frustrations are growing and the conflict between Ladybug and Chat is coming

Okay, I want to expand on this since I def didn't explain myself well in the original post!

I wasn't trying to say that his frustration was out of character. I think it makes sense and it's leading up to a really interesting character arc. My point was that the way it manifested was written really weirdly.

I think one of my favorite things was the parallel between Chat Blanc and Chat Noir that was pointed out in this post. And if that was the only parallel that the writers were going for that would make sense. Especially because it would be a callback to how Chat Blanc And I think it's very cool and it was a good move from whoever wrote this/storyboarded it!

But honestly, I'm not sure if that's what they were going for? Because:

Marinette has the nightmare about Chat Blanc, if it was supposed to be a parallel, then I feel like there would at least be a little more attention called to it. Especially since it's still a children's show. I do think that I may be wrong about this though and it might be addressed in a later episode.

It seems like the writers were trying to make a parallel to Gabriel because we see him punch a wall too. This is where most of my frustrations lie. Because again: it truly feels out of the blue to me. Chat Noir is rightfully frustrated. Gabriel just almost killed multiple children. We don't see Chat do anything else to warrant this parallel?

We've never seen him get violent like this before, so the sudden change is kinda jarring.

Which could be interesting!! Except. . .

Adrien has always been a really sensitive character. The violence also feels out of character because just doesn't care. That's the reason that it just didn't work for me.

Also! I want to make it clear that there's a difference between Chat being sidelined by the characters in-narrative and him being sidelined by the writers.

I think that both are happening with Adrien and Chat. *cough* lies *cough*. But that!! Is a different topic!!

I made the original post mostly just because I noticed that the writers were sometimes forgetting that Adrien cares a lot about other people's emotions.

That being said, I am very excited to see how the writers resolve this! I'm very obviously not on the creative team, so I could be very wrong and the writers could have a reason behind the outburst dfghjhgfghjk. Also, ngl this isn't my most thought-out "hot take." I am very sleep-deprived and very impulsive. I would love to hear your thoughts!

[wowtobio]

Haikyuu as Idols w/ reader as their manager

──── ∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗ ──── 

[1k special]

a/n: to celebrate 1k here’s something i wanted to write for awhile, since pretty much all of the haikyuu va’s sing. i hope yall enjoy! thank you all so much for 1k followers. I appreciate the love and support, y’all too sweet and i really did not expect it all 🥺

warnings: suggestive, cursing

Kageyama

The cool, stoic member everyone biases

Is known to have a soft side that makes eveeeeryone go heart eyes 🥺

If you look up his name on youtube there is probs a good handful of compilations titled “Kags being a huge tsun for 6 minutes” 

One of the lead vocals, has a very nice baritone voice and occasionally posts covers of his favorite songs. 

As your manager, he appreciates and treasures you a lot, though he does not show it often 

He’s just shyyy he’s trying 

Even crushes on you ooooo

And he won’t give any hints other than small gestures; lingering touches, being the only one he’ll speak too in the room, leaving you your favorite snacks and drinks on your desk, etc. 

He would definitely be afraid to involve you and him in a scandal tho, precious bb is just worried 

Tsukishima

aaaa another stoic member, just not as popular as his fellow members

But i can see him having stans that are HARDCORE like it’s tsuki or die no in between. they are a cult. 

Back-up/sub vocalist but the man can DANCE he always denies it in interviews though smh

At fan meets, fans will give him dinosaur plushies. he would always blush and get all flustered while mumbling a thanks cutest shit ever

Like Kageyama, he is secretly envious of you, though he is waaay better at hiding it. to the point you feel like he isn’t even interested lol

But then there is the whole “teasing = flirting” which definitely applies here

A part of me feels like he is known to have painted black nails, like it’s his signature 

you paint his nails for him

It’s so cute, omg imagine sneaking into his dressing room just to blast music and painting his verrry nice nails (tsuki has attractive hands dont @ me) 

But never catch this boy in a scandal, never caught lackin

Nishinoya

BALL OF ENERRRGY

He hypes up the group, the concerts, everything, 100%

Main dancer and back-up/sub rapper 

He is known for being a super good dancer and fans always dieeee when he does his dance solos 

Noya tends to stand out a lot in shows, concerts or so. Intros would go something like: “Hi I’m Daichi! Hello I am Kageyama. HAAAIII I AM NOYAAAAAAH” 

His fashion sense is mwah chef’s kiss. He owns airport fashion. The best street wear around and he rocks his baggy fits to stylish red carpets. 

(you’re his stylist ofc high-five you oooo)

Speaking of you, he also is super thankful to you and shows it often it’s so wholesome and cute.

Times where he would flirt, it would be funny attempts that normally end with you giggling at his flushed demeanor after messing up his pick-up lines.

Overall, I can just see you’re more his mom than his manager. 

“(y/n)-cchi what’s on my schedule for the rest of the day?” “shower, eat dinner then practice dance” 

Daichi

Super warm and welcoming member,, he’s a safe haven

Y’all saw this coming; the leader of the group

Starts with the perfect intros ALL THE TIME. In interviews, tv shows, concerts, etc.

Lead rapper, he spits some bars ngl 

And y’all saw this coming again, he’s the dad of the group.

Like if the members are bein wild children he’s always there yelling and trying to calm everybody down haha

When it comes to you, he definitely shows his gratitude outwardly to you.

He’d probably mention you and how grateful him and his fellow members are for you occasionally on radios and shows.

You always get super flustered when you confront him about it and he just chuckles and head pats you. 

If he were to initiate a relationship with you, he would ask his fans to understand his feelings for you :,) and he would protect and comfort you from any possible backlash bcs he loves you hehe

Sugawara

The sweetheart of the group.

Absolutely UNDERRATED.

Back-up/sub vocals but has the preeeettiest tenor voice ever.

Like could sing you to sleep.

He has his own soundcloud where he uploads his own covers and he sings like Justin Bieber songs, some Bruno Mars, just any romance songs.

Twitter is HIS platform he would post small snippets of him singing and some effortlessly beautiful selcas.

Being his manager, he is super duper sweet towards you. Kinda like Daichi but he is way more flirty.

Can be super sly with his compliments. And lowkey a huuuge tease he will leave you all flustered and all he’ll do is bat his eyelashes innocently smhh

Suga will do all this but since he’s super sneaky abt it, no one will notice so he won’t get caught in that scandal ykk

But, I can see him disguising himself in some silly sunglasses and a hat when going on secret dates with you.

And you’ll giggle while trying to pull the frames off his pretty face and he’ll whine and playfully snatch at your wrists awwwh

Kuroo

Very very popular among his fans.

Once again we got another leader here. 

He is for sure the main dancer and is a back-up/sub vocalist but he probably raps a few verses in a couple of select songs.

His signature is giving cheesy pep talks that hype up the group before performances.

It’s pretty cool but once you hear his words it’s cliche and you can’t help but giggle every time you witness it. 

Speaking of you, he has a huge thing for yah

Like he probably makes it painfully obvious, but only in front of the members and staff. No fans nor paparazzi, he has a reputation to uphold of course.

But that doesn’t stop secret make-out sessions in his dressing room. 

Sometimes he’ll just pull you in, pin you against the door and just stare into your eyes with so much passion before sealing your lips with his. 

When eating with the group, he’ll casually wrap an arm over your shoulder while teasing you playfully in front of everyone.

Other times he’ll rest his hand on your thigh underneath the table wink wink. 

Kenma

Shy small boi of the group

**Most presume him to be shy at first but he will actually roast tf out of his fellow members. Yk those ICONIC moments.

Main rapper, Kenma’s got bars and he can lowkey ruin someone’s career with a single diss track 😳  (he can sing too, has a pretty voice but denies it so he avoids singing most of the time).

MMM his fashion sense as well YES. Like have you seen those fanarts of Kenma rocking streetwear, yeah he would wear exactly that at the airport or somethin. 

Ofc a huge gamer, he will most likely be seen on his switch backstage, during breaks, on the plane, during vlogs, etc.

Being his manager, Kenma finds you very endearing and he’s always blushing and nervous around you. 

He hides his face behind his switch when he asks something from you awwwh 

He won’t mention you in interviews but when he is asked he will just be like “yeah.. i guess she’s pretty cool” with a light pink dusting his cheeks.

Kenma probably wouldn’t have the courage to initiate a relationship in fear of ruining a lot of things. But if it were to happen y’all are super lowkey and good at hiding it.

Yet overall, very wholesome. If a member were to walk into his dressing room unannounced they would see the sight of Kenma laying his head in your lap and playing his games while you play with his hair. 

It’s super cute until Kenma throws some inanimate object at the poor fellow :,(

Oikawa

OH the most fitting character as an idol and for sure the most famous out of everyone. 

Main vocalist hands down (ponyo ponyooo-)

Oikawa is always and I mean always bombarded with the press and fangirls anywhere he goes.

It seems like the only time he has alone time is when he’s in his dressing room with the doors locked and he only allows you inside. 

You two naturally got closer, you were the least annoying thing in his life so he felt comfortable around you and he found it fun to tease you every now and then.

One thing led to another and uhhhh

Definitely some dressing room sex involved with Tooru

You always scold Oikawa for giving you hickeys in very noticeable spots on purpose and he just waves it off while sticking his tongue at yah.

After awhile you probably have sleepovers with him because you both enjoy each others presence so much. 

His schedule is always jammed pack so you tend to have to overwork in order to keep up and make sure everything runs smoothly. 

So late at night when you’re organizing events for the next month after doing plentiful work, Oikawa will come up from behind and scoop you up in his arms carrying you to bed. He’ll cuddle you to sleep while whispering how you’re the best manager in the world.

──── ∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗ ──── 

a/n: kinda popped off for kenma bcs i haven’t wrote him in so long and i missed him hehe. same for oikawa too i just had a really cute scenario in mind. anyways, hope y’all enjoyed and once again thank you so much for 1k i love you all!

masterlist

[hyperfixationtimego]

Makoto has rainbow loom

Leon has tech decks

Chihiro has silly bandz

Mondo has his kickass embroidery and Perler beads

Taka has Rubik’s cubes and Perler beads

Hiro has fushigi magic gravity balls (that looks even worse typed out than I thought it would)

Sayaka has lip gloss phones

Aoi has those little things with the water and teeny tiny rings that just float and then there’s the button yk

Sakura has hair chalk and the friendship bracelet kits

Byakuya has a mini etch-a-sketch

Toko has Mad Libs

Hifumi also has Mad Libs, but the fandom versions

Celeste has the little Disney Princess teacup sets that came in a giant teapot

Junko has Lisa Frank bags and stationery

Mukuro has the glow in the dark stars that you stick on the ceiling and worms on strings

HEY I’D DIE FOR YOU?? I LOVE THESE????

yes yes yes !!! Makoto has rainbow loom and I’m not gonna go on another ramble about it but I love that for him I rlly do hdbsbdbdbdb

And!!!!! Yeah yes yeah yeah yeah!!!!!! Oh my god dude tech decks are so cool and fun to fidget with......he’s had so many of them taken away for disrupting class but he always seems to come prepared with like a billion of them hdbdbsbdd nobody knows how he’s able to carry and hide so many hfbfbfb The noise bothers some of his other classmates, so he has to be careful with them, but they rlly are some of his favorite things to toy around with 🥺

Chihiro,,,,,,silly bands,,,,,,,,galaxy brain,,,,,,,sometimes during lunch she just takes off all of the ones she’s wearing and lines them up on the table to look at them bc,,,,,,hdbdbdb pretty shapes and colors,,,,,,,and then forgets to eat unless someone reminds her dhsnsbdbs

Makoto 🤝 Chihiro

their arms being COVERED in bright colored bracelets

Mondo and his embroidery ❤️ we stan a king

And the perler beads,,,,,,,uffbdbdbdbdbd me getting flashbacks to my childhood with all these damn things omg but yeah it’s very calming for him!! it requires a lot of patience, but it’s also repetitive movement and action so he’s kinda just !!! 👀

he and Taka have quiet afternoons where they just both do them (either working together or separately) and it’s so nice n softttt??? Comfortable silence ishimondo,,,,,,,,,m love

And Taka with his Rubik’s cubes oh my LORD he probably knows the secrets to most styles!! he can do them pretty quickly, and usually asks someone else to mess it up for him again, but literally give him like a couple of minutes and complete and total silence and BAM there u go

also highkey he could probably solve it with one hand if u asked him to because that’s just,,,,,literally how much of his spare time he’s spent with these damn things dndnsbdbdw

OH MY GOD THE MAGIC BALLS,,,,,,DUDE OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

highkey the only reason he has one is because he ordered it when they were still in business and adamantly REFUSES to admit that he got scammed hdbdhsbdbdbw

he’s not good at it, per se, but he’s built up some sleight of hand skills, definitely hdbsbdbd also it’s probably just fun to roll around and fidget with (plus it’s weighted!!!)

everyone else watches him playing with it like,,,,wow king I am so sorry

he’s also definitely dropped it on the floor of his dorm room bathroom AT LEAST twice, which ended up shattering the tile (and possibly a ball, as well) so he’s just kinda :’)

AND LIP GLOSS PHONES FOR SAYAKA IS AN ABSOLUTE GODSEND HOLY SHIT

literally just,,,,,her vibes are immaculate oh my god ? she’ll put some on and then immediately call her girlfriend over like “babe come here I need to test something” just to kiss them on the lips bc ./////.

she is just,,,,,so cute I’m gonna die??? she also makes the obligatory “sorry, I need to take this,” joke whenever her lips get chapped and she needs to put some on bbfbfbvbf

I do not know what you mean for Aoi’s but I support it wholeheartedly!!

HAIRCHALK FOR SAKURA?????? IM GONNA GO FERAL OH MY GODDDD SHE LOVES IT SHE LOVES IT SHE LOVES IT SHE PROBABLY DOES PRIDE FLAG COLORS A BUNCH OF THE TIME AND OTHER TIMES JUST DOES HER FAVORITES LIKE????

and friendship bracelets oh my GOD 🥺 she’ll do them if she ever needs to de-stress or relax, because the repetitive movements are very soothing!!! and she’s 100% made a bunch for her classmates, ofc oh my goodness

Sakura 🤝 Makoto

Making bracelets as a coping skill and giving a shit ton of said bracelets to their classmates because they like to see them happy

hdbdvsvdvdv byakuya totally does!!

He hides it in his dorm; nobody must EVER know about it okay if they find out he’ll die. But it’s really really fun to fidget with and he finds himself using it after particularly taxing or rough days!!! Plus the visual satisfaction,,,,,shit can’t be beat

TOKO AND HIFUMI MAD LIBS!!!!! oh my god they have solidarity so they give each other words if other people are unavailable/not cooperating hdnsbsbsv

and they both crack up when the other person reads the story, too 🥺 Like Toko will try to pretend that she doesn’t find it funny, but she’s snorting and trying to keep a straight face by the third sentence. They both get such a nice fluttery feeling at making others laugh, too!

Jill has tamagotchis!!! A bunch of them!!!!! And she’s really good at taking care of them; she acts like they’re her children dhsbdvsbs everyone else in class 78 is always like how are they all still alive you’re not even fronting most of the time???

(asmr Toko checks on them and takes care of them sometimes for her but she’d die before letting anyone else find out about that ❤️)

And Celeste with the disney princess tea cups oh my goddddd 🥺🥺🥺 they’re practically some of her most prized possessions and she’s very proud of them

Kyoko has maybe two or three or so furbies that she carries around with her and treats like her literal children wnnssnnsdbdb she’s literally the embodiment of the “do you care if I take the skin off this furby” meme no I won’t take it back it’s true

she does shit like create long furbies and other weird ass stuff like that because sometimes she’s awake at 3 in the morning and gets Ideas™️

Makoto is horrified ❤️

HELL YEAH junko loves the Lisa Frank aesthetic ngl like????? bright ass colors!!!!! holographic visuals!!!! oh my god she definitely carries around the little backpacks even though they’re too small for her bdbsbsbs

like she can’t fit anything useful in there and then gets frustrated because of it shdhnssbsb Mukuro is just kinda “why don’t you get a normal backpack” “bECAUSE IT’S NOT FUN, MUKURO”

And Mukuro with the glow in the dark starsssssssssss waaaaa oh my gosh she loves them so much they’re so calming to look at ??? prettyyyyy and also she has solidarity with Kaito because he has them too hdbsbdbd

they both find out the other has them and it’s just the Spider-Man pointing meme and *vibrates excitedly*

[saeyoungs-sunflower]

(HC) RFA + MC in Quarantine

Listen lads, this is just a silly I wrote this the other day (I may have been a little but tipsy but shh) and I thought I might as well share it. I hope this cheers some of you up during such a scary time <3

***

Yoosung:

★ okay this is gonna sound obvious

★ but bare with

★ G A M E S

★ but!!! not just LOLOL!! oh no no!

★ i’m talking board games, PC games, active games like tag and hide and seek

★ you guys basically act like children how are you surviving on your own

★ you guys also do LOADS of cooking

★ like so much

★ you’re baking like one cake a day pls slow down

★ ngl you guys are thriving staying home all the time lol

★ if Yoosung has online classes, you set up a study club!

★ he does his college work whilst you do whatever work you gotta do boo love that tEAMWORK

★ honestly you guys have never been so productive oop

Zen:

❤︎ oh boy

❤︎ be prepared to be SMOTHERED in love

❤︎ zen i love you too but pls i have stuff to do

❤︎ m o v i e  n i g h t s

❤︎ f a c e  m a s k s

❤︎ there are so many movies/tv series that you guys have been waiting to watch together but haven't had time to bc of zen’s work

❤︎ big sad :(

❤︎ BUT GUESS WHAT FAM

❤︎ WORK IS CANCELLED TIME TO SNUGGLE DOWN AND WATCH SOME DAMN CINEMA

❤︎ it usually turns into make out sessions but shh nobody has to know

❤︎ Zen kinda discovered that you guys c a n n o t cook

❤︎ so!!! you learn!!!

❤︎ it’s MESSY y’all

❤︎ “aw mc you look so cute with flour on your nose” throws flour at your face “zen i sWeaR tO GoD I just wanna make b r e ad leave me ALONE”

 ❤︎ quality couple time <3

Jaehee:

☞  lets get down to business

☞ to defeat

☞ THE H A N

☞ lol JK

☞ seriously the house has never been cleaner

☞ obvs your cafe isn't open so y’all have some time on your hands

☞ one day Jaehee suggests gardening

☞ oh man

☞ it escalated

☞ gardening has now become an OBSESSION

☞ honestly you couldn't find a prettier garden on pinterest swear down

☞ you also decided to renovate the house you’ve been meaning to do it but have never had the time

☞ your house is now a work of art wow proud of you guys <333

☞ tbh, Jaehee actually has a small fear of getting sick/you getting sick so you guys are only leaving the house if it is a b s o l u t e l y necessary

Jumin:

♚ nobody talk about the bad ending

♚ i said don’t…

♚ he’s be waiting for this moment who needs a cage when you have a national lockdown

♚ all jokes aside though this man still has to work from home

♚ poor bby

♚ let us all shed a tear for Jumin Han

♚ you love to bring him tea and homemade baked goods whilst he works and guess what??? so does he lol

♚ it is time

♚ to D A N C E

♚ this man is so extra oml

♚ insists on taking online ballroom dance lessons bc why not MC hmmm???

♚ he is actually a very good dancer

♚ once you guys get good enough it turns into spontaneous ballroom dancing in the kitchen whilst you clean up after dinner

♚ wine??? wine did you say??? W I N E???

♚ oh b o y

♚ you've seen each other tipsy before, and lemme tell ya it takes a lot to get this man drunk

♚ his tolerance is so high from all the w i n e

♚ but one night you two get absolutely HAMMERED like oh my God guys calm down pls

♚ rip your liver lmao

♚ it makes for a v e r y funny evening though you guys have literal tears in your eyes and its so nice to see the mighty Jumin Han loosen up a little aw bless

Saeyoung:

☀︎ okay

☀︎ listen

☀︎ this man is absolutely out of control i can’t

☀︎ you thought he was a prankster before???? oh man i am so sorry

☀︎ “saeyoung why is there a balloon above saeran’s door” “don’t worry bout it babe” “i am WORRYING SAEYOUNG”

☀︎ on a serious note though being stuck in the house does sometimes bring back some bad memories for him

☀︎ there are some bad days where he just n e e d s to get out

☀︎ so you sometimes go out for a quick drive in some desert place ya know let’s be sensible

☀︎ you guys have also made a habit of climbing to the roof and watching the stars aw

☀︎ you’ve also both fallen a sleep there a few times oopsy daisy

☀︎ the memes are the only thing getting you guys through at this point it’s a problem

☀︎ but you are loving the quality time with your choi boys so it’s not all bad <3

☀︎ family snuggles are a must

☀︎ a M U S T

☀︎ the desired s n u g g l e position is you sat on Saeyoung’s lap, your legs draped over Saeran’s lap and Saeran’s head resting on Saeyoung’s shoulder AW

☀︎ sometimes you hold Saeran’s hand whilst he’s asleep bc your edgy boi needs love but wont ask for it ever

V:

❁ first of all

❁ a w

❁ this man is the sweetest peach

❁ he makes so many cute things for you whilst you guys are in lockdown

❁ i mean he’s writing letters, knitting you scarves, painting you pictures the whole shebang

❁ he even made you a pyjamas

❁ he’s sewing guys he’s out of control

❁ if your working/reading/just having a quiet moment he will sketch you

❁ you wouldn't know it though bc he’s a s n e a k y bastard

❁ he’s never filled a sketchbook so fast and it’s his most treasured possession

❁ a book!!! filled with YOU!!!!! amazing!!!!!!

❁ wait, did you hear that????

❁ oh yeah

❁ ITS ARTS AND CRAFTS TIME

❁ actual children

❁ even if what you make is terrible its just so fun because you're doing it together

❁ brb just crying my eyes out i love this man so much

❁ you guys also make care packages and do the grocery shopping for the elderly/at risk people in your area and deliver it for them AND sewing scrubs/masks for doctors

❁ “I don’t want to stay inside doing nothing all the time when there are people who need help” THIS MAN IS TOO MUCH

Saeran:

☽ i hope you're ready for this grumpy motherfucker

☽ he never went outside anyway but now that he cant go out it sounds like the best thing in the world saeran pls

☽ ah yes it is time to wake up

☽ oh it’s 4pm?????

☽ HA who needs a sleep schedule anyway

☽ also Saeyoung is not the only twin with the Mischief Gene™

☽ oh no no no

☽ you two team up and absolutely destroy him

☽ i am so sorry Saeyoung but you had this coming

☽ when Saeran says that he wants to learn an instrument you are GOBSMACKED

☽ HELL Y E S

☽ he orders a keyboard and omg he’s such a fast learner

☽ probs from all the years of hacking ouch

☽ do i smell??? A FAMILY BAND?????

☽ you and Saeyoung play kazoo

☽ Saeran has left the chat

☽ seriously though his piano playing is so pretty and it calms him down so much ughhh PRECIOUS TOMATO BOI

***

This is so chaotic hahahah I hope you enjoyed though. If people liked it I’ll do some more silly things like this. It was a nice break from...the other stuff I’m writing...hint hint watch this space ;)

Masterlist

[naw-naw-honeyimgood]

ChengQing (lmao never realized that was their fucking ship name)

so pros of (Jiang Cheng/Wen Qing):

one of the few possible het ships available to mdzs fans like there are all of five named female characters and this is the only one not in an established het pairing. and like sure ive seen yanli w/ someone else a couple times but you CANT put her with JIANG CHENG and i cant say ive ever seen mianmian in a serious relationship in fics with anyone besides either her canon hubby or a chick (usually yanli, wen qing herself, or even sometimes both lmao).

it’s basically written itself in cql!! he has a very obv and clear crush on her, even gives her a comb and offers to help her! she seems interested but the way the storyline went it was simply not meant to be :’(

you get to pair off jiang cheng!! ngl once u finish mdzs its kinda sad for everyone not wangxian (in their generation/above) cuz theyre the only one that get a happy ending. Everyone else is forever alone / depressed / bitter or a combination thereof. so it’s nice to see jiang cheng getting a happy ending!

he... gets... kids...? like ngl as a childless person that is happy to stay that way thats not exactly a pro in my eyes but you might look at his relationship w/ jin ling and say “he’s a great father! he deserves to be a father!” which okay good news! wen qing can bear children!

Now. Cons. 

for one thing the fact that you have a lack of options doesnt exactly mean every possible het pairing can have good chemistry even if you change circumstances enough. there comes to a point where certain pairings can only be really viable if one or both of them are ooc.

lets be honest im willing to bet that AT LEAST 80% of the reason cql introduced this ship was because they were not allowed to make the wangxian pair explicitly Together (and i dont even mean anything specifically sexual), and they needed SOME SORT of romance to feature in the story. xuanli doesnt count because theyre an established background ship,  the jiang parents dont count as romance, we aint talkin about the villain relationships, and lbr, mianmian already had a lot more signif in cql than mdzs. so it makes sense that they took the arguably most important male chara besides wangxian and made him have a crush on the most important female character that wasnt his SISTER. 

what im trying to say is that cql pulled that pairing out of a hat. if you look at canon at ALL i highly doubt there would ever have been feelings, just as there never were. we dont quite know the age dif but we know that wen qing was the older sister and wen ning might have been a bit younger? than the boys? cannot quite remember but we dont know if she was only a year or two older or if it was like. mingjue and huaisang. we dont know! and i canNOT see jiang cheng going for an older chick. also their personalities would clash So Much. she has older sis vibes and not the gentle kind like yanli. she snaps at wen ning’s mumbling and stuff a good couple times- you think she’d tolerate jiang cheng’s emotional immaturity? hah. 

this also kinda segues into my main point of: as depressing as it is that jiang cheng is forever alone unless you pair him off... he would honestly put whoever you pair him off with through hell. he’s not nice. so many jiang cheng stans like to argue that he’s a traumatized kid that was raised to channel his emotions through anger (and raises bitterness under his skin like an ugly puppy) but inside he has a heart of gold, and they’re... not exactly wrong! i mean- literally every younger chara is traumatized in some way. but... that doesn’t really... excuse the shit he’s pulled? as much as jiang cheng stans like to forget: jin guangyao was RIGHT when he said that jiang cheng’s insecurities got wei ying killed. his CLOSEST ALLY. 

tying back to wen qing we have their actual CANON interactions (or lack thereof). wen qing didn’t exactly protect wei ying and jiang cheng out of the goodness of her heart when lotus pier fell: she was protecting wen ning (her BROTHER) from the repercussions of his own actions by saving wei ying (and Jiang Cheng ig idk he was just there bUT YOUNG MASTER WEI-)

not QUITE sure why she agreed to doing the golden core transfer (maybe scientific curiousity? i mean she had an unproven medical theory and here was a volunteer) but it def wasnt For Jiang Cheng.

and then the next time she saw him? do you guys remember the next time she saw him? it’ was when jiang cheng came up to the burial mounds to kill wen ning’s corpse and tell wei ying to turn over the wens. 

KEEP IN MIND that jiang cheng KNOWS wen ning and qing SAVED HIS FUCKING ASS after lotus pier (not How but he KNOWS THIS) and yet he still tells wei ying to hand them over.

he makes wei ying choose between what amounts to the cultivation world and his morals. 

that does not a good healthy relationship make. also again their personalities would clash like so bad. i love wen qing way more but you have to admit her personality is super similar to madame yu’s. and we already agreed that jiang cheng was traumatized as a kid. im not saying fengmian didnt have a hand in it but you gotta admit a good amount was madam yu and her insecurites and accusations she piled on her son. and you wanna pair him up romantically with someone who won’t take his shit and smile? will call him out? HAH.

im not saying this because i think jiang cheng should be with a softer personalitied (guy) like lan xichen or wen ning or huaisang because god knows those pairings have their own issues. im just saying that in canon-verse all i can ship whole-heartedly is jiang cheng / therapy, but since there is not therapy in canon-verse, or even if there WAS then there’s no way he’d admit to needing it, then yeah he can stay single for all his bitter life. better that than making jiang parent relationship 2.0 like fuck.

(this of course means that in modern aus where he DOES get therapy i am Open)

also real quick but jiang cheng was NOT a good parent to jin ling and i will not take constructive criticism like sure he was better than the jiang parents and the lan parents but that is SUCH a low fuckin bar and it’s a fact that in chapter 9 jin ling literally thinks “if I can’t slice off her head with this blow, I will die here- death it is then!!” (taken gratefully from the exiled rebels scanlation) and that is NOT a healthy-minded child.

the only healthy minded children is like. jingyi. and probably sizhui. although i am not here for the way the lan sect raise children but sometimes you have to take what you can get.

also i want you to look me in the eye and tell me that wen qing could and would do anything besides throw down with someone that so much as looked at her brother wrong

because jiang cheng apparently decided to lay the blame for jin zixuan’s death at wen ning’s feet (which is incredibly ironic considering he blames wei ying for yanli’s death??? like i feel like he could stand to use his brain cells a bit more??) and repeatedly tried to kill him.

[ryttu3k]

Hello naughty children it's Gehenna time.

...which means I'm going to read the book properly this time and write notes on each scenario, partially for my own reference, partially in answer to an ask from @rayshell22livejournalcom​ from about a zillion years ago. Sorry about that!

Mood soundtrack: Godspeed You! Black Emperor - F# A# ∞; Lift Your Skinny Fists Like Antennas To Heaven; Yanqui U.X.O.

Prelude: Netchurch is an interesting character. Very skeptical, despite, well, the entire setting, although that's definitely, uh, broken by the end. Feel very sad for Afifa, who was a pawn in all this. Creepy babies galore!

Introduction: "While Vampire favors that futile, tragic, and - we'll say it - angst-heavy conclusion" - lmao you don't say. Although I do like how they have the consistent golden rule that if you don't like it, just ditch it! (Of course, the Gehenna scenarios as a whole have been completely retconned anyway by v20 and v5, so this entire book is a good example of taking what you want from it and ignoring the rest.)

"Some people are on opposite sides of this thing. They're elders who don't want to knuckle under to the Antediluvians (most elders will accept their proper place in the heirarchy again with the rising of their progenitors) and poor, misled souls who bought into the lie and are pissed about it (paging Mr. Pieterzoon). Bottom line: the Camarilla collapses like Enron/WorldCom as the worthlessness of its foundation becomes public knowledge. Chaos ensues among the vampire community, princes find themselves besieged by their own locals, and it's all a big clusterfuck."

Have I ever mentioned I love how VtM phrases stuff? Also F to Jan.

I like how they have a masterlist of what's actually going on with the Antediluvians. Spoilers ;D "For example, note that [Tzimisce] is simply referred to as [Tzimisce]. Even here at the game studio, our limited mortal minds weren't able to comphrenend the creature's real name." Lovecraft only WISHES he had eldritch abominations this spooky! Ennoia is 'Active and scary' and apparently spooks the devs just thinking about it. Makes sense. "Giovanni (Augustus Giovanni): Augustus is a pig, and he should probably die as one of the early events of Gehenna. He's the youngest of the Antediluvians and probably possessed the greatest ego (in mortal terms), so it'll be cosmic justice when he eats it." I love how no one likes Giovanni, even his creators. Malkav may or may not BE the Madness Network, in which case they cease to be an Antediluvian and just become... a part of the Malkavians, I guess? Absimiliard may or may not be chilling at the bottom of the ocean, because mood. Tremere / Saulot is definitely a fun one to play with, yeah. Although, oof, if Saulot ever gets control of their shared body, he's going to be fucked up if [Tzimisce] activates, so. Probably better to create a nice fresh body, like what BJD suggests with the child Saulot.

Chapter 1 - the lead-up: Basically a rundown of the signs and how they're interpreted. "An angel dies: How does an angel die? Who has the gall to rise up and slay one of God's firstborn? Or perhaps this is another metaphor. An angel could be a pure and gentle creature, or then again, it need not be one of God's angels (not that God's angels are necessarily pure and gentle). A feared and particularly vicious Necronomist Tzimisce, Sascha Vykos is sometimes referred to as the Angel of Caine. Many would rejoice the night that Vykos died." Hey rude :( I vote they kill Michael instead. He wants to be an Archangel? Fine, he can fulfill a prophesy XD

Honestly I really do dig that Ennoia Earthmelded with the entire planet. You can go so many directions with that, good or bad! Ennoia as The Beast Below, or Ennoia as Gaia? (Wow, that'd really fuck with the Garou XD) I love how the general consensus on Haqim is like, no one knows if he exists or not but lbr Ur-Shulgi is bad enough. Kinda dig the idea of the Toreador ante, Ishtar/Arikel, being genderfluid? I mean yeah essentially demigods have no need for gender anyway, but the constant debates over whether the Toreador ante is the female Ishtar or the male Arikel (or, uh, was it vice versa?) does lead to some interesting concepts. Ooh, similar to [Tzimisce] being linked to its entire clan (and the Tremere, anyone who's ever taken part in the Vaulderie, and anyone who knows Vicissitude), [Lasombra] may be connected to anyone who knows Obtenebration? [Ravnos]... yeah, probably dead. F to the clan. And yeah I think [Tzimisce] is flat-out the scariest one of all, and probably the one most likely to actually start the apocalypse, lbr.

Ugh this is one of the books that calls Sascha 'it' :-\ Do not like. ...Also do not like the suggestion that they're an unknowing agent of the Eldest, given, uh, the last chapter of the DA Tzimisce novel. Shoo! Shoo! You've ruined their unlife enough as it is!

Epistolary material! I do dig those. Most interesting: a letter to Sascha mentioning apocalyptic visions of New York but with the Carpathians in the background, and an anonymous letter to Hardestadt warning him of one of his line tearing down a castle that the writer feels believes the Camarilla. GO JAN FUCK IT UP.

And on to the scenarios themselves!

Chapter 2 - Wormwood: This is an interesting one. Literally a Biblical vengeance - God takes a good look at the Children of Caine and goes, "Well, this is fucked up", acknowledges that Caine never really sought true forgiveness and repentance, and sets forth Wormwood, the Red Star. The truly repentant are saved, the rest just. Die.

Herald here is a dhampir girl named Alia - thinblood father, human mother. When she's twelve, she becomes God's chosen, basically. Traveling with three thinblood guardians, one night, she's approached a Gargoyle named Ferox with True Faith, who sees himself as a fallen angel. And Alia offers him a way of redemption - find the chosen true believers, wait out Wormwood, receive judgement. Anyone can seek sanctuary, only the true believers and the ones genuinely willing to repent will survive the judgement itself. Alia and Ferox set out to find the other chosen ones.

Whew. Very full-on - the players remain in one place with a whole bunch of other vampires for forty nights. I mean, that's a test in and of itself XD All welcome! (Except infernalists and the antediluvians and Caine himself. They're fucked no matter what.)

Like. All welcome XD "Some Storytellers might feel that this character roundup could get too silly, suddenly having all these celebrity Kindred get together for a big slumber party, and they would be correct." Fuck that give me a slumber party AU XD

Am very glad about the note that the vampires inside only lose one blood point per 10 days, rather than every day. Otherwise, uh, it'd get gory.

Yeah, this is a really interesting scenario. Very character-focused, very introspective. All about the characters trying to work out what it means to be good people - not the strongest vampires, not the most powerful, but good people. Are they worthy of salvation? That's the crux of the story. Of course, it's very, uh, Biblical, heh, but it's first and foremost about morality and redemption. I dig it.

Also, giant vampire slumber party.

Chapter 3 - Fair is Foul: Ooh, this is a Lilith vs Caine scenario.

This one has the Withering hit in weird ways, including clan-specific ones - like the Banu Haqim only able to feed on vitae, then only able to gain sustenance from diablerie. Gangrel turn even more animalistic. Lasombra take to the seas, Obtenebration ripping holes straight to the Abyss. Malks, uh, leak madness. Nosferatu get even uglier, Toreador devolve into debauchery. Tremere develop third eyes, and yes, I did laugh out loud when I read that. Tzimisce... hmm... get a bit, uh, uncontrolled. And Ventrue find they can now only feed on... other Ventrue. Fun times!

"At your discretion, Lilith might be particularly vulnerable to Jewish True Faith, as the Jewish tales about her are the source of nearly every negative sentiment ever directed against her in writing. As a result, most orthodox Jews bear Lilith great contempt for defying her husband and her God." Yeah ngl I think she's pretty dang cool and I can just see, like, most of my ancestors facepalming at the idea XD;; Fuck obediance you do your own thing.

"Trying to work out traits for Lilith, Lucifer, Caine, or any of the Antediluvians would just be a waste of our word count and your time." I like the time they published a guide for fighting Caine. It was two words. "You lose."

Ah. Okay, Saulot in Tremere's body being taken over by the Eldest = scary, because have you ever been attacked by an Antediluvian wielding Thaumaturgy, Valeran, and Vicissitude at the SAME :) TIME? :) Yeah :)

Really dig the idea of Abel showing up as the first Wraith. The forgiveness element.

Overall, this isn't my favourite scenario, I think? It feels very chaotic, and while it's probably the most traditional to play, I'm not sure how much it literally challenges the characters, unlike the sheer soul-searching...ness of Wormwood?

Chapter 4 - Nightshade: Chapter starts with, "We all wear masks" and my first thought was "boy you have no idea" XD

Awww yes this is the masquerade break scenario! See here for my thoughts on that and how the Nephtali could be adapted to v5, heh.

Yeah okay earthquakes, volcanoes, and riots are normal enough. A horrible blood virus where it appears some flesh-like thing is living in people's veins and feeding off their blood sounds like something that starts with T and rhymes with Shzimitze. ...Probably. No one knows how the fuck it's pronounced anyway. Oops, those riots are apparently over the existence of vampires. Yeah that'd be... unfortunate. And more earthquakes, this time due to Kupala vs the Eldest. Whew. Red star, yep, standard. MORE earthquakes, this time due to the Second City rising. Sounds legit. Bad times all around!

The details on breaking the Masquerade are interesting. Basic emotions: denial, rationalisation, fear, anger, acceptance. The acceptance one is interesting, because I can definitely see some jumping to it straight away.

So, on to the scenario itself! Jan recruits the players to fight the... uh, mass under NYC. This is the corpse of the Eldest, which is more or less a giant fungal infection held together with Vicissitude, which frankly is just icky. This actually is  canon-compliant with BJD, since it apparently has only just... dissipated? or whatever there, or if it still remains, it's no longer conscious. In this one, its soul flicks back to Tremere's/Saulot's body and wakes up, and basically every Tzimisce, Tremere, and anyone who has ever drank Tzimisce blood (which would be the entire Sabbat via Vaulderie) spontaneously frenzies. Godspeed. Cyscek, a Tzimisce methuselah, helps defeat the, uh, blob at the expense of his life, and warns with his last words, "The Dragon rises. You must stop it. Find Vykos. [They] know." (Okay yeah the text says 'it knows' but also fuck that.) Ooh, plot point!

Aaaand then they retreat from the battle, exhausted, only to find the whole damn thing broadcast on every TV screen, vampiric Disciplines and Cyscek dusting and all. W h o o p s.

Lots and lots of details of a major masquerade breach here. Hardestadt shows up and tells Jan he's proooobably gonna get Final Death for, you know, trying to save the world. Gonna share this bit because it's Very Satisfying.

Please refer to my tag #hardestadt has no rights ;D

Anyway! The characters now recruited, Jan leads them back to London for the Convention of Fire. He's working with Calebros and... like a bunch of others, probably anyone can end up here, so long as they want to actually help and not just fall apart like the remnants of the Camarilla (trying to diablerise their way into keeping power) and the Sabbat (...ditto tbh). Those definitely in attendance are Ambrogino Giovanni, Hesha Ruhadze, and Fatima! And lbr the Nod Squad are probably there too. As if Beckett would pass up the chance to NOT witness what's happening with Gehenna. And Anatole is literally a prophet of Gehenna! They found the Nephtali, led by a council of twelve, with Jan at the head. Name means 'the highest point' or 'no further' - as in, Gehenna goes no further than this.

Oh lmao here we go, the scene I mentioned earlier - Jan vs talk shows.

F to Jan.

Tremere's body (inhabited by Saulot) disappears from beneath the Vienna chantry. Tremere's body, with [Tzimisce] now well in control (having overtaken Saulot; Tremere, meanwhile, has taken over Goratrix's body, with Goratrix's mind stuck in a mirror... it's complicated), wipes out the Vienna chantry. RIP to the Vienna chantry, which doesn't survive in either timeline tbh. Hey, I wonder if that means that Saulot (in Tremere's body) is dead in v5? Etrius manages to escape and reports that the Eldest is now on the way to Ceoris, where it'll call all the remaining Tzimisce to it to become, uh, a part. Pleasant.

Everything between Krakow and Bucharest is straight fukk’d. Ceoris is the centre of all this - IIRC it's somewhere in the southern Carpathians, nearish Brasov. Either way, hell of a fight results with what can only be described as an eldritch abomination, finally both managing to destroy Kupala (the Eldest's goal) and reducing The Thing down to a human-looking body. This bit is interesting! Tremere (in Goratrix' body) and Etrius take one look at each other. "Master..." "I... I know. But where the hell is Saulot?!" Good question, because he sure ain't in Tremere's, uh, former body any more, which was in fact what was fighting them the whole time. Either way, Tremere-in-Goratrix'-body leaps at [Tzimisce]-in-Tremere's-body and diablerises his, um, former body, which must be weird as hell, then tries to turn on the characters and his powers fuckiNG FAIL. EAT SHIT TREMERE. And then the players kill him too and realise that over the course of one night they've destroyed the demon Kupala and two Antediluvians, Tremere and the Eldest. Not bad. This is the battle that causes that second lot of earthquakes I mentioned earlier.

Back to London! They find the mirror containing Goratrix amongst Tremere's belongings. Poor fucker sorry not sorry.

And now the players receive a summons to escort someone from Montreal to the Nephtali headquarters in London! Namely, a Tzimisce named Myca Vykos~ They've recently defected from the Sabbat and want to help take the Antediluvians tf down. (Note: the book here has reverted to using he/him pronouns since they're back in their original form, I'm going to keep using they/them because biological sex does not determine gender identity or pronouns goddammit. ...Anyway. I AM going to use the name Myca since that's the name they're using themself, mostly because, uh, 'Myca' is a bit less noticeable than 'Sascha Vykos', haha.)

So Gehenna has started. Myca's woken up in their original form and being like, "Hey you know what I am preTTY SURE I don't want to serve the Eldest" and promptly joins the Nephtali.

From New York to London to Romania to London to Montreal to London (...London is a hub world apparently), now off to Turkey, to Kaymakli! Which is actually a real place, my brother's been on a tour there. Anyway, this is the part of Kaymakli that they don't show the tourist and that's been sealed shut with lots of angry Cappadocians instead, so that was fun. Presumably Kapaneus hasn't been chilling out there in this one.

Also Colombia has completely been overtaken by the Sabbat so that sucks.

Into Kaymakli! Which usually doesn't let Cainites back out so it may be one-way. Don't worry, there's a ritual for that. At the bottom, they find Augustus Giovanni! Who is pissed off he never actually got to eat Cappadocius' soul and so wants to eat God instead.

As you do.

The book very strongly encourages the players to kill him. Just 'cause. Which is a mood, tbh. Killing him also reveals a beaten, bound Nosferatu, having been Giovanni's most recent food source. An F for Okulos. He's been there for four years, having managed to get a lost fragment of the Book of Nod for Beckett, who promised to come back for him and. Didn't. Which is just rude tbh and I can kind of understand why Okulos ends up betraying Beckett in the Gehenna novel but anyway. (Not canon as of v20, he's perfectly present and chill in BJD.)

End results - the fragment that Okulos went to retrieve shows how to restore the Second City, which holds a complete Book of Nod and may hold the key to stopping Gehenna. It's in Enochian so your player characters probably won't be able to read it (book suggests asking Sascha or Ambrogino). Next stop, Egypt, and a meeting with Hesha Ruhadze! Man this scenario has a lot of signature characters. It also suggests getting third parties in here too, so Beckett would actually be a really good choice. Either way, they find the probable site, and suddenly, a Second City.

Archeologists make grabby hands. Beckett, somewhere, is probably crying in joy. They find a vial with some very old blood in it that they definitely shouldn't drink because otherwise they'll explode (the book uses Sascha as the example here XD;; ). Along with some mystical enscriptions, they return to London and get to work on the prophecy - namely, it suggests that 'the gentle one' (likely Saulot) will die at the hands of another, but arise in a new form, and will stop Gehenna that way. Etrius, one of the only Tremere left and having joined the Nephtali, goes 'fuck it what do I have to lose?' and goes to find whatever new form Saulot is in (potentially can also involve Goratrix here).

Hm. Well. Saulot is apparently in a research centre outside Sydney. Apparently we're mostly chill with vampires, aside from Christians XD Go figure!

Apparently it's a cloning facility. One of the rooms had, past tense, a child, successfully cloned six-year-old, who was in perfect physical form but vegetative from birth. Religious characters will pick up that it's because the kid's body didn't have a soul. Now, it does - Saulot's. Having been thrown out of Tremere's body when the Eldest took over, his soul fled until it could find the most suitable vessel - a soulless cloned body. No actual soul to have to subdue. Saulot ends up reborn, albeit in the form of a six-year-old and without any memories. Turns out, the child was taken by a cult of Thinbloods, believing him to be the messiah.

Sydney's messy situation gets described here! Short version, Sydney's Prince is/was Sarrasine, who was a Toreador. Except he wasn't a Toreador, it was a fairly open secret he was only POSING as a Toreador - he was actually a Caitiff. (Except he's not actually a Caitiff. He's a sixth-gen Setite. Sydney is Like That, yes.) Given Sydney's independence from the sects and its apparent Caitiff Prince, it's become a major site of Caitiff and Thinbloods, which Sarrasine is just thrilled about but can't do anything about because he doesn't want to actually go 'lol I'm a Setite'. Anyway, either way, everyone is unaware of Saulot's return, so the players seek out the little boy, who's pretty spooked and confused. Asks the characters, "Who are you? What is this place? What do all these people want?" and his third eye opens. Tada! Salubri Antediluvian, and like the prophecy mentioned, he's 'unholy' and 'a mockery in the face of God' - a clone.

Back to London with kid!Saulot. The Nephtali have been trying to work out what tf is going on. A researcher tried drinking from the vial. It was messy. The characters might get some downtime. Sarrasine's followers may attack to try and get the kiddo back. Either way, everyone goes to bed, and wakes up to find a Darkness having overtaken the sun, which is generally not good for anyone, and Lasombra characters are just, feels bad man. The Veil of Darkness means vampires can be up 24/7, along with other things that don't like sunlight, and I imagine things like... plants not being thrilled. Also probably very confused animals. I'm not sure if it's like a dark atmosphere, or a physical body between the sun and Earth that just eclipses it whatever vantage point you look from, or what? Disciplines like Auspex, Obfuscate, and Obtenebration go a bit fucky. Then, a few days later, everyone feels a... Summons. For low-generation vampires with still-living Antediluvians, it's strongest. Higher gens with destroyed Antes, not so bad. So I'm sure you can guess what's summoning them.

Yep. Antediluvians. Banu Haqim are getting summoned to Alamut instead so Ur-Shulgi can turn them into an army against the Antediluvians, so godspeed resisting that, Elijah.

Off to the city of Gehenna (it's nearish Jerusalem). Elders of all stripes have been heading there to kill their childer in hope of being rewarded by their Antediluvians to get their powers restored, which is terribly rude. Indeed, the Antediluvians basically go, hey, can you not, and also can you start Embracing more childer for our armies, because they're not very nice either. Pretty much all the characters have been summoned for their crimes against the Antediluvians, and now they're gathered before them - Set, [Lasombra], Ennoia, Absimiliard, Malkav (as like... a cluster of identical little girls with glowing eyes because of course Malkav would use the Creepy Child trope), and [Toreador], who's so beautiful no one can tell if they're male or female. When the players and child!Saulot get there, they question him, but he's literally a six-year-old boy and is spooked. He also has the vial, somehow. Set takes it, and Kiddo says, "Don't drink it. You'll burn up." So Set makes Kiddo drink it instead, because he's a nice guy like that.

Kiddo's third eye opens. A giant black throne appears. The dozen small girls that are Malkav say, "Father's home." Kiddo!Saulot says, "No, Father's dead." Girls start screaming so loud people start bleeding thick black blood from their ears and doesn't stop until Set kills all twelve. A random stranger, now with their glowing eyes, steps forward and basically goes 'wow rude'.

Powerful beam of light appears. The Antes (aside from Kiddo!Saulot) writhe in pain. Angel appears, asks Saulot if he's willing to atone for all vampires. He agrees. Throne explodes, Antes fuckin' die, and everyone promptly frenzies and tries to eat each other, because vampires. In the aftermath of that, vampirism basically... ends. The player characters may be rewarded by becoming human again, as do a lot of Thinbloods, but most everyone older just, uh, dies. Vampirism ends, but the Earth has been saved.

That is... hmm, bittersweet, I think. It's a pretty compelling chronicle, very dramatic, but it's much less character-based and is more, 'the characters get dragged along to Do Shit'. I kind of like the idea of it being a story involving the characters we know, but for original characters, I think Wormwood is a much more compelling scenario so far.

Chapter 5 - The Crucible of God: Okay I'm tired now and this is the 'rocks fall everyone dies' scenario so gonna skim-read this one.

This is the chapter that introduces the level 10 power for all disciplines - Plot Device. The Antediluvians can do shit because they feel like it. Whew. Also, if an Ante spots anyone of their blood line, they can just make them... explode and their blood gushes into their mouth. Monch monch. Spot another clan mate? Roll to avoid frenzy. Just woke up? Roll to avoid frenzy. Good times!

And then the Tzimisce Antediluvian awoke as a mass of Vicissitude flesh fungal infestation with tentacles and lampray mouths and stuff and ate anything in reach until it ate, uh, every living thing in Manhattan. In one night. Bad day tbh. Eventually it burns when the sun rises, but what's left underground is still there and shit's still messed up. Like picking a leaf off a dandelion and it starts bleeding. Trees with faces, swarms of insects forming into eyes and watching. Nice and creepy. In the aftermath, it's basically infecting every life form on Earth with Vicissitude, which is distinctly uncool.

Absimliard has an animal army and currently looks like a giant humanoid jellyfish.

Oh boy here's the Banu Haqim part XD;; Interestingly, it's a lot better for them! Haqim doesn't eat his childer, they feel themselves strongly bonded to him but still maintain their own minds and wills. Downside, anyone who doesn't follow Haqim alone gets hunted down so he can eat them, so Ur-Shulgi's probably having a field day at being vindicated and poor Pyre/Elijah is hiding tf under the bed. Plus side, it only lasts a few months before something kills Haqim, so hey! And there's genuinely a way to become human again, especially for high-humanity, high-gen vampires, so that actually would be a genuinely good outcome for Pyre/Elijah.

Malkavians end up as a giant hive mind. Like, more than usual. [Lasombra] covers the world in darkness, then it stops. Ennoia merges with the entire planet and starts eating people. And vampires. And Methuselah. And other Antediluvians. She's kinda hangry at this point.

Tremere attempts to rule the entire world using the Human Genome Project as the true name of the entirety of humanity. It lasts about two minutes before [Tzimisce] turns him into a meat crime, along with, uh, the entire rest of the world, aside from the players, who were part of Tremere's ritual and thus immune from it.

Also Saulot, who they just met in the form of a little old man.

Turns out, he planned it all along. Lured Tremere to him, knowing that his body was tainted by using Tzimisce blood to become a vampire. Knew that when the Eldest returned, he'd be succeptable, and Saulot would be able to bounce out when the Eldest took over. Now, he can lead the characters in the only way to stop Planet Tzimisce, which is, uh, prayer and letting themselves get eaten. Could actually work! And you end up human again in the bargain!

End result - all vampires gone. Some of the more human ones do end up human again. Either way, world's still fucked. Open Antediluvian rule for several months has destroyed most of humanity. There are still remnants - former Malkavians who are still a bit weird, former Tzimisce who are a bit... Vicissitudey. Ennoia's still around! She's mostly chill except when she occasionally feels like rearranging landscapes. Otherwise, it's time to recover.

Alternate endings - that last one wasn't depressing enough, so here's a scenario where All Is Tzimisce, here's one where there's global extinction of literally everything except the player characters who gradually drop into torpor and never recover (or just flat out burn if they're outside), or there's one where the players are the only vampires left and start a new cycle with them as the new Antediluvians or something, oh and Caine's still kicking and is Very Displeased that God won't let him die already. Gooood times!

Rest is how to basically play it, and character sheets. Which go back to calling Sascha ‘it’ again *sigh* (And using the whole alien look despite explicitly mentioning that they look human again. Of course.)

So, final thoughts! Gehenna is... an interesting scenario. Lots of possibility for introspection. It’s very... apocalyptic, and that may bother a lot of people, since, well, for the most part, it’s going to be the end of playing your character as a vampire. Which I figure most people are playing Vampire the Masquerade for. So it’s basically either a hell of a finale, or you just don’t make use of it.

Favourite scenario did end up being Wormwood. I just really like the introspection and opportunity for hope. Did also enjoy Nightshade, but in a different way, I think? Like for Nightshade, I’d rather read it as existing characters working together, maybe as a novel, whereas for Wormwood I’d want to play it since it’s such an intensely personal kind of thing.

(I also still want a slumber party AU ngl.)

[theblackbirdsgemimagines]

Ramble away, cause I feel the twisted head rot, I kinda wanna see what you think about our bois. ~ a pocket sized dragon hops in excitement.

A POCKET SIZED DWAGOOOOOONNNN 😭💞💞💞 That’s so BLESSED, and tysm omg, I’m very glad to just spill out my barking on every boy, bc yEAH THE BRAIN ROT SKDHAKDB

THE BRAIN ROT IS SO REAL LOL

Everything I breathe ends up relating to TWST in some way, like at this point just let me take my friends, cousins, and pets, and of course Lulu and Seb, and I will have 1. A Gottdamned Harem, 2. So Many Children, and 3. NEVER WANT TO LEAVE. Kwfhskdhjwek

Ok this is gonna be long bc I gotta cover all my boys, so rip lol.

Dorm Leads:

Riddle

GOD, my Fucking Baby, my CHILD, my SWEET BABY BOY, I’M 👁💧👄💧👁

I would die for him, beetch, he is PRECIOUS ♥️

He reminds me of how I feel Ciel would behave if S/O took the place as Sebastian’s contracee, too, so like 🥺 Lots of feels 😭

Is Son, I have adopted him now. If you mistreat him, don’t ever speak to me or my son ever again. I’ll FIGHT his MOM, don’t TEST me. I’m his new mom now. His BIRD mom. So proud of him, he’s like...one of the few that’s actually shown growth in canon after his overblot kshdkadjs

Leona

👁💧👄💧👁

.....I am a Mere Simp....

Ya’ll.... I swearh to ghOD I simped hard for Scar back when I was a wee thing, I did NOT expect to simp for him AGAIN LATER IN LIFE, what the FUCK aidhskdhskdj

Like shit bitch, damn, you may not be king of Afterglow honey, but you can be king of my heart if you wAnt to bb....

Leona: *smiles once, even if it’s smugly*

Me: *WEEPING* Look at hiiiiiiim!! My sunshine booooooy! 😭

Does this make me a furry

Probably

I am too Simp to Care Anymore

I HESITATED TO GET ATTACHED BC THIS BOY LOOKS LIKE A FUCKIN WOMANIZER IF I EVER SAW ONE, BUT HE DRINKS HIS RESPECT WOMEN JUICE EVERY SINGLE MORNING AND I WAS A GONNER SNDJAJDHSJ

FUCK

Call me a Herbivore again, bully me //SLAPPED

Azul

He secretly a lil shit sometimes, but tha’s ok, it’s mostly in a silly way, especially post overblot~ UvU

The sweetest bby everytime I read fanposts on him, like god, ah 💜💜💜 WHOMST COULD BULLY SUCH A CUTE CHUBBY OCTOBABY I’LL FIGHT ALL OF EM!! A sweetheart 10/10 would be his friend 💗 Not making contracts with him tho, lol

...ok maybe SOME after his overblot, but they’re able to be easily reversed now, so it’s way more chill andhsjdj

Kalim

FUCK!!!! F U C K!!!! BABYYYYYYY!!!! BABY!!!! I HAVE ADOPTED HIM IF YOU TOUCH HIM YOU D I E

He is literally so sweet, anytime anyone was like “you’re so nice it’s annoying” I WAS READY TO COME FLYING IN TO BITCH SLAP THEM LIKE AJDHSKDHSJ (even if I also loved them lol)

Like NO you are WRONG whfksjd

He has also grown so much, and I am proud ♥️🧡

Vil

Jesus Christ, canon Vil is Hurting Meeeeee ajdhskdhsj

My fave fanon Vil is the one that recognizes all different types of beauty, though~ uvu and is v encouraging to anyone that may be struggling with self hatred 💜

Canon: Vil is pretty~.

Me: Wow, wtf???? He IS so pretty... How rude I didn’t think you were serious! Wow him??? Pretty??? Wow??? Wow...

Idia

I’m not sure yet, as I haven’t seen him very often, but of the few times that I have: BIG same, huge mood, and Me FUCKING Too, goddamn akdhakdj

Idia is my Anxiety and Anime Nerd personified tbh lol

What Ortho is to him are what all my comfort characters are to me, honestly.

Like what would you like bby, you want that singing voice?? Ok here comes a synthesizer just special for you~. Ily, mwah~ u3u 💕

Malleus

HEAVY BREATHING

Ok maybe it’s just the lack of story/info out on him yet, but I don’t currently simp as hard for him compared to Leona, I’ll admit jajdkajd

BUT BOY HOWDEY DO I EVER STILL S I M P...

He Is Baby... And I Lob Him....

I am going to smooch those horns and forehead crown of beautiful scales 🖤🖤🖤 I am going to do it!!!! Here I go!!!

HE CAN HAVE ALL THE ICE CREAM AND TAMAGATCHI DATES HE WANTS I’M- 😭

This man is too precious for words, and I have so much childhood nostelgia to ‘enchanted’ woods, and being in the mountains, so he has Old Fae Friend vibes to me~🖤

DRAGON FORM DRAGON FORM DRAGON FORM DRAGON FORM DRAGON F-

Ngl I ship him and Leona a lil bit lol

No, not just bc that makes a poly with my two faves easier, but that is a bonus factor jadhajdj

Vice Dorm Heads:

Trey

Oh my god, the Daddy to my Mommy with all these newly adopted lil kids of ours, ya know??? What a wholesome sweetie and funny lil shit jahdksdh~

I love him, I would gladly make tarts with, AND for him 💚💚💚

The kind of boi who I’d ship HARD with anyone he started dating bc My God it would warm my heart So Much 💞💞

Ruggie (unofficial but may as well be at this point lol)

He took a while to grow on me kadhskdhsj

But I think he’d be a sweet, if a trouble-maker of a friend to have~.

Dank you for taking care of my sweet lion bby, honey, I’m sure Farrena is a sweetheart, but boi I hope he gets his shit together to fix up where Ruggie lives 😭

I think if I met his granny, I’d CRY jadhajsh 💗💗

Leech Twins (?)

Idk if they’re vice leaders, but who cares lol

THESE are the older Big Brothers in every sense of the word. (My canon ages most everyone up just a bit, save for Riddle, Ace, Deuce, Kalim, Jamil, Cheka, and anyone already 20+)

The ANNOYING older big brothers, lol.

The ones that hug you to death (Floyd), or use you for an arm rest (Jade), and specifically Do the thing you asked/told them NOT to Do.

This is fine with me tho, I’m an only child, please give me the experience of annoying older brothers lol 💙💚

Jamil

I used to hate you bby, I’m so sorry akdhskdhs

I’ve adopted him now, and I’m v proud he’s trying, but making clear what his boundaries are, and trying to come out of a shell he was made to be in for so long 😭

AND HIS DANCING IS SICK LIKE HONESTLY I’M SUCH A PROUD MOM 💗💗💗

Rook

God. FUCKING Rook, lol.

IDK IF I SHOULD TRUST YOU, but I also kinda wanna be your friend akdhakdjs

HE CONCERNS ME but he also seems nice and v sweet sometimes, lmao

Blz don’t stalk me tho 😬

STOP SHOOTING YOUR ARROWS AROUND SCHOOL YOU BLOODY HEATHEN FRENCH PRISS, YOU ARE GOING TO KILL SOMEONE

Also, if he DARES hunt cute animals around me, especially BIRDS, I am going to GRIP him jahdkahdsk

He’s like if Lord Druitt was a Little More Nice and a Little Bit Less Creepy ajdhak

Lilia:

GOD.

I LOVE THIS FUCKING GRANDPA.

I. FUCKING. LOVE. THIS FUCKING. GRANDPA.

I absolutely hc him as nonbinary w/masc pronouns, I absoLUTELY do.

I adore him, I love him, I haven’t gotten a squish (hardcore desire to be someone’s friend, lol) this hard for a character since AngelDust, I-

Pwease be nonbinary friends with me, Lilia 🥺

THE ONLY PERSON HERE SHORTER THAN ME, BUT I’LL TAKE IT AJDHAKDHJS

Anyone know Corpse and how he plays Among Us? That’s how I see Lilia playing his video games with friends and I JUST I JUST I J U S T

The Spencer to your Carly.

He and Crowley are free to compete as Dad with me too like honestly kshdkadjjs

He’ll always be granpa tho uvu 💚💖🖤

Extras:

Ace

God, the Fucking Annoying Middle Brother that pranks you ALL THE DAMN TIME, but I love him andhakdhsk

Deuce

THE BROTHER THAT WILL BEAT UP YOUR BULLIES 💙💙💙 SWEET BABY BOY

The Josh to Ace’s Drake. The Cody to Ace’s Zack. The Freddie to your Carly and Ace’s Sam.

If he and Ace started dating, tho, I would CRY.

But regardless who they end up dating, it’ll be slow burn friends to lovers, and literally the most adorable shit to watch EVER 💞💞💞😭

Cater

Seems Like A Womanizer But Actually Drinks His Reapect Women Juice And We Stan That 🧡

Can always count on him to help tou get the best Magicram shots, bless you Cater 🧡🧡

Also rly wanna be his friend, ngl 😭 Even IF he pranks me a lot kadhakdhsj

Jack:

H E AV Y BR EA T H IN G

Ngl my feelings for him are in the air IDK IF I WANNA SMOOCH OR NOT YET I JUST KNOW I LOB HIM HE GOODEST BESTEST BOY 💛💛💛😭

If all three Savannaclaw bois got in a cuddle pile with me, I would Not Be Mad

How can I give this boy love, tell me and I will Do It

Gift him all the cacti’s he WANTS💛

God he drinks that respecc women juice bright and early on his run every morning, you KNOW he does 💛💛💛

I wawnt to pet his ears an tail an fwuffy wolf form 😭

I WAWNT TO SEE THE BOY SMILE AND BE HAPPY 💞💞💞

Sebek

CHILL CHILL CHILL CHILL CH-

He is a v devoted guard tho, we love to see it UvU

I don’t have more info on him hekdhskdj but his fanmade content seems v v sweet~ 💚

Silver

HE ATTRACTS BIRDS AND I CRY ABOUT IT PLEASE BE MY FRIEND AND TEACH ME HOW 🥺🥺🥺

Him being raised by Lilia and Malleus literally gives me so much Fucking Seratonin....... God 💞💕💗💗💞💞💗💗💕💞

Ortho

IS BABY????? IS BABY!!!!!! I’M LOVE HIM I’M ADOPTING HIM IS BABYYYYYYY 💙💙💙💙💙

Cheka:

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

He is so FUCKING CUTE what the FUCK!

Leonaaaaaaa... 🥺 Your NEPHEWWWWW 😭

I might steal him from Farrena tbh, lIKE MY CHILD NOW~ 🧡🧡

I just sob and hug him every time I see him honestly 😭

Teachers:

Dire Crowley

Ohhhhhh god oh god oh god

Be my dad. Please. Be my dad. PLEASE be my dad. Ya’ll think I’m joking, I’m not. Please adopt me. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK.

This man as a father gives me so much dopamine and oxytocin and seratonin??? I have been weeping for WEEKS, please adopt me, Sir

Fathers with zero braincells being wrapped around a daughter’s little finger makes me so weak, and I am just here with Daddy Issues like ajdhakdhsj BLEASE ADOPT ME MISTER BIRD MAN

Crewel

Ew.

Forgive me, I haven’t seen much content with him in it/that could be considered wholesome, bUT JADHWKDJSJ

UncoMFORTABLE

Please keep the kink talk out of the classroom, S I R

Call me puppy one more time, see what happens, I’m not scared to fight a teacher akdhakdhsj

Trein

The Dad Figure that tries to be the stern part to Crowley’s blumbering kahdkqrhsjdj

Don’t feel as much attachment to him emotionally, but I like him~

Just let me pet your cat sometimes and give you holiday presents, and we’re cool~ ♥️

Vargas

Found the womanizer //SMACKED

And of course, I can’t forget Grim~!

He’s grown on me, and if anything happens to him I will kill everyone in the room, and then myself 😭

I will pet and snuggle and hold him all he wants and feed him all the tuna his heart desires uvu 💙

[beigejournals]

Season 5 Lucifer

welcome to my unsolicited thoughts about Season 5 of Lucifer.  

as an avid and veteran series binger AND a talker-while-watching-a-movie-or-series-but-does-not-want-to-spoil-anything-for-my-friends type of person, i have finally dedicated a space and found a good way to let all my thoughts out as i watch a movie or series when i am alone when i can’t bother a lot of people because (1) they don’t want to be bothered and (2) i don’t want to spoil things for them.

so here are my thoughts, and of course, SPOILERS AHEAD.

BTW, i LOVED all of Lucifer! but this season was a slow burn for me. 

ep1

drug scene at Lux; is Amenadiel mean now?

so is Lucifer himself in his own hell loop when he became the ruler of hell? his own guilt towards his father? idk (to be frank, i don’t remember the past episodes except for the fact that he is now back in hell)

the premise of the first episode is cute!

side note after the title card: i remember how much i loved the soundtrack for Lucifer!

Maze is still hot.

I love how Maze and Chloe’s relationship developed and how they don’t have to use words to communicate.

Amenadiel’s and the Psychologist’s house HAHAHAHA i love it.

is Charlie Jesus? His mom’s faith in front of Ella is like every mom plus every religious person ever haha

YES. ELLA. YOU. DESERVE. A. GOOD. GUY.

self-improvement is now a meme, huh?

Dan is me.

comment on drug scene: Amenadiel is still the same, haha!

Maze and the card, haha!

how was the guy in the mask face (did i just say mask face?) blurred but in the party, Los Angeles was in perfect accuracy. excuse me.

coming out of the dead: “oh sorry, that’s so gross!” LORDT HAHA

love you, Charlie! hope you don’t feel like you have to perform because your mom expects a lot from you and that’s so ironic because she’s a psychologist!

Dan’s speeches about parenting: i get it tho, parents try to love their child, sometimes, they just don’t know how

also, i think it’s the sister but Chloe’s just a softie

lol Maze is jealous that Chloe got to talk to Lucifer and trying to say that they don’t need Lucifer.

OOF MAZE.

i forgot about what happened with Eve.

GUYS THE MURDERER IS LITERALLY GOING TO ESCAPE.

the amount of projection as defense mechanism in this episode is too much it feels like it’s too on the nose.

but i do love the parallel between what’s happening on Earth and in hell.

the amount of layers in this question either it’s Lucifer’s or his or his sister’s (assuming it is his sister who was behind his murder)

ok apparently it’s not his sister.

me in law school:

sana all kaya kang mahalin na babalik from hell. kilig aq.

also, after all these years, Lucifer’s house has been so clean!!! wala man lang alikabok

if she’ll be fine without him then who tf is that?

ok i read the synopsis for the next couple of episodes. i don’t like spoilers. don’t make the same mistake.

ep2

i’m Ella when it comes to my friends’ special people HAHA

also, i love the slight lean to one side to show us that this is not the real Lucifer.

why does he have to be naked???

it’s so funny for me how they have to reestablish him. LUCIFER NEVER LIES HAHAHAHAHA yes we can remember now after you repeated it 3x.

ALSO WHY IS EVERYTHING TO ON THE NOSE. EVERY SECOND IS A METAPHOR FOR SOMETHING. was it always like this?

Oh Michael. Nice. Was he an archer? We love the American accent.

how can Amenadiel not know that was Michael? GANON KA IDENTICAL SIZ?

we love the unnecessary car chase just to  reinstate the fact that this is a crime show

that slomo with the wings!!!

also everything is so slow with this show!!! idk why but everything feels just a little bit slower (or maybe i just want lucifer and chloe to be together? idk)

gwapo ni lucifer nung nagmomol sila ni Maze pls

cringe ng elevator scene

ykw. i think it’s because i like the lucifer character that’s why i’m impatient. he hasn’t been appearing the way i want him to.

see. you don’t have to remind me so much about the show because i know he was supposed to say “what is it that you truly desire” not fear. I FEEL LIKE THIS SEASON IS DUMBING THE PEOPLE WHO LOVED THE SHOW FOR SO LONG. okay sige.

either she knows it’s not him or SHE’S REALLY THAT NICE AND POWERFUL OF A HUMAN BEING.

oh i’ve been questioning whether they had sex already and this episode answered my question

CRINGE coffee scene: the spoon???

random question: are angels virgins? so is Michael a virgin?

what kind of a person would just go deep on someone else’s pocket just because they ran out of money?

knew it Maze won’t do Chloe dirty like that!

thanks Chloe. u know better than that. (full disclosure: I THOUGHT SHE WAS ACTING BADLY APPARENTLY A GOOD ACTOR CAN ACT BADLY TO PROVE A POINT?)

literally just liked it and now there’s a new secret that was said too soon.

God baka naman pwede mo ko gawing Chloe Decker char.

AH so interesting. Lucifer = Desire. Michael = Fear. Too on the nose again but that time, i needed the guidance because i am a dumbass.

God ain’t raising his children right!

ep3

yes explain everything to me it’s literally not like we have been binging this show for 2 hours straight

see, the Lucifer character is really endearing. i’m enjoying myself again hahaha. (well, i guess Lucifer when he’s with Chloe?)

can i just say that Tom Ellis was born for that role. he fits is so well that him acting as his own twin doesn’t sit well with me.

i just feel like this show was written by a psychologist who liked watching murder shows.

it’s Lucifer, Chloe!!! siya yon.

ep4

love Lucifer-Chloe tandem!

we love how the actors can sing and the show gives them a chance...

one thought: is everyone going to play a double of who they are?

also is Maze the daughter of Lucifer?

i love how they’re transcending mediums, reminds me of Community with their random episodes.

there you go, Chloe’s doing the double acting too.

Now it’s Linda. (so maybe this is the episode i was asking about earlier).

Now it’s Ella.

omg is this why i loved fleabag, it took forever for the Priest and Fleabag to finally do it? no. i just love the Priest.

Charlotte’s back! and the distance from the table shows how not okay they are. okay.

green screen while driving i love it.

now, Daniel!

we love gender fluidity? i guess. i’m not sure how you call it but i appreciate.

Lilith’s dress for the second song. OMG.

there again to make us dumb. after we just watched the whole thing happen, they retell the whole story again. damn. they think we dumb.

literally this season is making every girl kiss Chloe.

why did she blow the ring? was that her life?

what’s that song in the end?

OH that was the reason why she was retelling everything.

damn celestial beings are the worst parents.

ep5

i wanna be Dr. Linda Martin please.

i appreciate Lucifer wearing the bracelet until now. (but i expected nothing less)

i’ve always loved how people reacted to Amenadiel. he always seemed nerdy but these are times where he truly shine and im so happy.

i forgot.  i think i was showering that time that Michael and Lucifer fought and theyre hella dumb. ok lets go toxic masculinity mixed with daddy issues.

i know they’re too on the nose ABOUT EVERYTHING but i do like the debate about free will and predestination

honestly i don’t know what’s Chloe’s issue is with being made by God probably just because i’m lazy and i just want to lay everything in His hands but coming from a very atheistic perspective where she comes from i kinda get it. i guess my only reasoning why i’m okay with God’s reason is with her is because of my fear of the unknown; my current fear with not knowing my true purpose. at least she got hers! what is she complaining about?

oh i get it now, but that’s why there’s free will Chloe (or idk, idk how God works; there’s currently no electricity in my house rn. i don’t get how that works even if we pay for our electricity all the time, how am I suppose to know God’s plans?)

but aren’t well created for something else? looking at a selfish perspective, maybe He created all of us just because He wanted to.

wow. literally when the nun kissed Amenadiel, the lights in our house opened up. if that ain’t God. idk who that is.

wow that’s so interesting.

“There are no shortcuts.” 🥺

he exposed himself i’m interested. what if i were the one to whom that was exposed to... how would i react?

another sample of them explaining to us WHAT WE ALREADY CAN INFER FROM THE SHOW (the conversation actually continues to dumb it down for the audience) but i get it. it’s religion and fiction built together.

oh i just cringed i almost vomited with this 

also can i just share these. these are the funniest thing Chloe said on the show.

ep6

OOF what a horrifying way to start the episode (after the beach fiasco)

they’re holding us. that’s so adorable!!!

ugh. im still cringing.

yes jowa for ella yes pls. ELLA YOU SAID YOU WANT A NICE GUY!!! HE’S THERE!!! i’ll take him if you won’t!

Chloe if you don’t want Lucifer, i’ll take him too!

can i say how proud i am of Chloe and Dan’s relationship. it’s very healthy for what they are. add Lucifer and Dan to that too! we love men.

also the women in this show have bad taste in men. (except for who Linda married, i guess)

we love the seasonal girl’s night!

that whole charlie thing being amused by lucifer’s devil face is the best bit

was it Michael calling? and oh noooo ;(

FUCKEN MICHAEL

ngl i could have waited for another season for them to have sex on season 6 episode 6 but sure have it at season 5.

ep7

we love a person who wakes up and is not pretty. princess anna who? (i mean she is wearing full on make up, but we’re okay with that snore)

Deckerstar!! they made a word for it

our mojo??? does it only work on lucifer or does it work when she does it to others as well, we shall find out.

oh no! Lucifer’s isn’t working at all HAHAHAHA

it’s currently 2:19 AM. i am tired and sleepy.

Dan talking to Charlotte 🥺🥺🥺🥺

Fucking Michael

oh he emphasized archangel Michael. with my limited knowledge being raised Catholic, i was going to ask earlier if he was an archer because he had crooked shoulders. AND I JUST CHECKED. ARCHANGEL MEANS HIGH RANKING ANGEL NOT AN ANGEL WHO’S A FUCKING ARCHER. me being raised Cathlolic means nothing. HAHAHH

now i’m realizing if i see an angel, maybe i won’t be in the situation where i’ll see Amenadiel but Michael

NO NO NO AMENADIEL

i love this HAHAHAHAHA

knew it. called it! worked on lucifer ONLY. HOW CAN TWO PEOPLE BE THAT MADE FOR EACH OTHER. LORD BAKA NAMAN.

i’m ella shipping them.

THEYRE SPEAKING TAGALOG HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH and HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

what song was that? “When it hurts, just to breathe” same

The Shining reference no thank you pls

NAAAH i really can’t do horror things especially not with things i truly fear and when i don’t have a curtain on. No thanks.

14:54 and i’m watching again open the lights bro, it’s easier to find clues that way   also i do get that they’re closing it to ensure that the killer is not there but theyre also moving like the killer is not there anyway so better open up the lights! tho i really know nothing about crime solving (i just typed crime solving instead of solving crimes didn’t i)

we stan ella’s healthy relationship!!!

can i just say there was a time where i can’t even say serial killer out loud so this is really hard for me to watch alone

i know that he’s vulnerable around the detective. BUT SHE SAID HE CHOSE TO BE SO BY NOW HE SHOULDN’T BE AFFECTED BY WHAT HE DID.

Fucken Michael.

ep8

how attractive can you be that even in slow motion, you look great.

oh apparently he did not die.

ALSO OO NGA CHLOE. US2 MO SIYA MAMATAY TEH.

CHLOE THE OVERTHINKER but i get it. BUT STILL.

you know that montage of people just studying and it’s now happening to chloe trying to solve a crime. that’s my cinematography goal HAHAHA. it’s been awhile since i’ve been invested in studying like that.

Lucifer can be just so immature some times

is KillShare based off of SkillShare?

also i’m thinking that Chloe was either taken by Michael or Dan or the SK.

that ring of Lucifer on Maze is probably the longest ring someone has waited for.

i love Maze’s eye make up! ALL THE TIME!

if the lady here is not detective and they’re relieved. that’s just fucked up, man. they were slightly relieved. that’s good acting HAHAHAHAHA.

I’M JUST PRAYING TO GOD THAT PETE REALLY IS A GOOD GUY AND NOT THE SERIAL KILLER COZ I CAN’T HATE THAT GUY PLEASE. the key and the research!!! WTF. stop trying to be smart, show!!!

his mojo is back, does that mean Chloe is gone? 😢

OH AFTER THE TAPES, I THINK IT IS THE BOYFRIEND. DAMN SHE’S REALLY INTO BAD MEN, ISN’T SHE?

I’M SO SCARED. THE SUSPENSE IS KILLING ME.

THE FLOWERS ARE FRIGGIN KILLING ME.

kamukha niya pa si Penn Badgley, nice.

DOES HE GENUINELY LIKE HER OR IS THE KISS TO THROW HER OFF GUARD.

AH NO. i think he genuinely likes her. except that she... you know found that he’s a fucking murderer

HAHAHA PETE

right??? why does this show have to say everything out loud like don’t already know.

oh he just used her but then he liked her. idk. the way he speaks too, so nonchalant.

preach, ELLA!!!! shout out to those who had crappy childhoods and are not serial killers! that’s the bare minimum i guess.

go, Ella!!! know your worth!

lol made me love Pete, he’s funny.

ok my assumptions were right-ish.

HAHAHA, his american accent.

his choosing to be bot vulnerable around her anymore, Michael, i think is a way of him staying alive for Chloe but ofc Chloe will think that Lucifer would rather have his vulnerability than to be with her.

baka di lang love language ni Lucifer words of affirmation, okay! HE SAVED HER LIFE SO MANY TIMES AND NOW SHE’S DOUBTING BECAUSE HE HASN’T SAID I LOVE YOU YET??? SIZ. HE LITERALLY LEFT HELL FOR YOU.

MICHAEL STOP. Michael the shit stirrer. we all have that one friend.

awa me kay Maze. she’s like a lost dog throughout the show.

does Michael want to be God?

skipped thru the speech. cringe.

what’s Amenadiel’s problem with his child having a normal cold? what’s wrong if he’s a mere mortal?

WHY IS EVERYONE IN THIS SHO’W SO INSECURE. i get so annoyed every time Chloe’s mad that Lucifer doesn’t get what he wants

it’s just that i resonate with Lucifer. it’s hard for me to say i love you and now i think Amenadiel stopped time.

oh. i thought Amenadiel’s fears about Charlie being mortal was superficial, i just realized that he was afraid that his child was going to die. but, he can take him to heaven like what he did with Charlotte, right?

oh Michael.

MAZE! MICHAEL IS A PATHOLOGICAL LIAR!!!! you’re fine! i don’t have a soul either.

celestial beings and their daddy issues and inability to communicate with one another and the desire to fight it out as if that’s the solution

HOTTEST BROTHERS EVER DAMN.

itong si God ngayon lang magpapakita anuna siz.

WHY ISN’T HE PLAYED BY MORGAN FREEMAN BUT OK.

CLIFFHANGER!!! IM MAD.

ep 8 should have been called blueballz tbh

[rockcfellers]

 /   let  me  introduce  you  to  a  prized  member  of  our   student government   ,   arden rockefeller .  this   cisfemale  virgo   has  been  a  student  at  our  institution for   seven years   and  is  currently  a  21  year  old   junior.   through  the  halls ,   she  has   always  reminded  me  of   danielle rose russell  ,   but  there  is  always  more  than  meets  the  eye ,   like  the  fact  that  she managed to get somene’s admission to cape coral deferred a year for her own benefit .  coral  cape  has  made  their  future  just  as  bright  as  their  smile ,   i  assure  you .  ʼ      (   muse 10 ,  adri ,  19 ,  cst ,  she/her   )

go on, replace me, when you’re craving something sweeter than the words i left in your mouth, go on and spit me out

NAME — arden olivia rockefeller.

NICKNAMES — n/a? 

PRONOUNS — she/her.

AGE & DOB — 21 & august 23, 1998.

PLACE OF BIRTH — new york city, new york.

NATIONALITY — american.

MAJOR — psychology & political science.

EDUCATION — cape coral international school.

CLUBS — student government, unicef campus initiative, and lacrosse.

* background overview !

arden is twins with her brother, neels, both first born to this half of the rockefeller generation (he’s older by several minutes, but she’ll never attest to that) they’ve always been kinda close but never attached at the hip.

you know, i honestly feel like she had a fairly decent? childhood? like nothing was really wrong, just that her parents were always busy and never really gave the attention they should’ve to young children. 

she was typically always very bright and cheery to everyone, evoking a “your daughter’s so sweet” from most people she met, which felt like the biggest compliment to her, because it meant that someone thought she was nice even if they disliked the rest of her family for any given reason, kind of like a twisted self worth?

her parents definitely would’ve preferred she did something that seemed more feminine, but arden found a love for kickboxing and later lacrosse, the two sports a great place for her to channel her energy into, letting her mellow out when she’s going through her day to day routine.

arden’s still figuring out how to be both who she’s expected to be and who she wants to be without facing any real repercussions, but hasn’t quite gotten that part down yet.

it was always known she could come to cape coral, considering her family, but she’s lowkey really grateful that she was given the opportunity to study what she wanted where she wanted. 

that being said.... she’s still kinda a bitch. i mean, someone she knew from outside of cape coral wanted to applied and had gotten accepted, but arden had worried that they would interfere from her getting idk maybe a spot in the student government or accepted into her research program etc etc, so she talked to her grandfather and had their admission deferred a year so that her studies wouldn’t be affected.

* personality !

okay so,,,she is New so i’m still working out all the kinks but for the most part, she’s just.. neutral

before, she used to be like aggressively happy and cheery and nice. probably to compensate for the fact that everyone around her just seemed so mean.

she’s always hated being seen as weaker than or less than anyone else, which is partially why she’s taken up lacrosse and boxing, much to her grandfather’s distaste. 

now she’s more focused on herself and is capable of being able to brush off any kind of comment that comes from people she doesn’t feel like directly affect her, which isn’t a great mentality to have but neither is caring too much about what other people think

the part of her that was very kind and viewed life with a sweet naivety is there, but heavily guarded and buried. she just feels like, it’s not something that’ll do her much good rather than leave her looking a mess or fool when someone takes advantage of it.

she’s like,,,the person that isn’t afraid to knock you down a few pegs but will do so with the sweetest smile on her face to really seal the deal. 

she found an interest in politics, actually hating the way things were run but really enjoying finding out why people did and voted and favored the things they did, so she’s double majoring in psychology and political science

she tries to do everything on her own and hates asking for help, like even when she really needs to, but it’s mostly because really needing someone makes her uneasy because she’s always wondering if they’re going to leave her eventually or if they’re just using her or if they really don’t care about her the way she cares for them

that being said, she’s loyal as all hell to her loved ones. like will literally help you get away with murder if you asked her for help, once you’ve reached that point you are absolutely important to her.

* character tropes !

so she’s basically the maiden in the sense that she’s typically overly self confident and finds herself in positions where she’s stuck and needs help, whether it’s being in too many things at once and being too spread out or like in actual danger. arden heavily takes after her parents in the sense that she wants to be wholly capable of taking care of herself, the feeling of being dependent on someone making her uneasy. because of this, she finds herself in situations that could’ve been completely avoided if she had just taken a step off her high horse and admitted or realized she couldn’t do it on her own. the confidence she exhibits today was a learned trait however, arden getting her heartbroken by someone she had really loved taught her how to be comfortable with herself and just be a Badass, but protect the softer side to herself from then on.

* playlist !

wasabi — little mix:

stick like toffee, sip like coffee wake up, change your mind and drop me love to hate me, crazy, shady spit me out like hot wasabi lick me up, I'm sweet and salty mix it up and down my body love to hate me, praise me, shame me either way you talk about me

arden’s a strong believer in the quote by william shakespeare “love me or hate me, both are in my favour. If you love me, i will always be in your heart… if you hate me, i’ll always be in your mind.” she’s really aware of how she can come across as, but is really selective in who she cares to spend time showing her full self to. everyone else and every other opinion gets taken with a grain of salt. she’s definitely had friends that only used her for her name and then dropped her once they were done,she wasted no time moving on.

hold me while you wait — lewis capaldi:

i wish you'd cared a little more (hold me while you wait) i wish you'd told me this before (hold me while you wait) my love, my love, my love, my love won't you stay a while? (hold me while you wait)

a few years ago, she was in a relationship where she had cared a little bit too much about what they thought of her, finding herself seeking their approval for everything, truly believing this person was the sun. she fell hard and fast for them and they took advantage of this and cheated on her, thinking that they would get away with it… and they did for a while. arden tried to excuse it because of how much she loved them, but was starting to feel like she was never going to be good enough for them, but staying with them until things ultimately came to an end, still holding onto the hope that things would change. eventually she realized that she couldn’t keep holding onto that relationship forever and things ended.

winter — relic:

where am i going? i can’t see nothing but the road that’s out in front of me i think it’s snowing

arden’s the worst at multitasking and it shows even in her life. she’s very one track minded and knows what she wants out of it, but only sees one way to get there, so everything that’s the tiniest bit off her track, she gets thrown off completely and needs someone to just nicely push her back in the direction she was headed.

* aesthetics !

candle lights, the breathlessness felt when seeing big city skylines, scrunchies, tart strawberries dipped in sugar, iced coffee in mason jars, long swooping cursive, high-waisted jeans, half opened jewelry boxes, setting a new pen against fresh paper, standing outside during the middle of a sun-shower, tucked in shirts, a hand reaching out to catch you when you fall, golden hour. 

* wanted plots !

i’m the worst at coming up with things but,,,,, here’s a few 

general friends: honestly some from childhood, some from high school, others from college, give me New friend with the people coming on scholarship, anything

best friends: someone that’s been by her side for years, someone she’d literally trust with her whole life

ride or dies: honestly what it says, maybe like two or three of them that have been through the thick and thin of it but still have a really strong friendship in the end?

confidant: honestly, probably someone she’s close with, but doesn’t see on a regular basis? maybe they just box together from time to time to blow off steam? it helps if they’re not someone she’d see all the time, that way she’s not constantly staring her admission in the face

bad influence: someone who can teach her to let go and get out more, care even less about what others think, especially her parents. even if that’s taking her to parties or drinking/smoking alone in a room

exes ( good, bad, anything in between ): you know the drill, hit me with the good angst. (male, female, nb)

roommate ( probably a cape coral student ): arden doesn’t like needing people but that doesn’t mean she wants to be alone, they probably have a pretty nice place together ngl. i picture it being really cozy and nicely decorated?

hook ups: you also know this drill, sometimes you gotta blow off steam. (male, female, nb)

[pixelatedrose]

50 (if you don’t mind)

(Fuck i forgot to answer these last night-)

50: talk about something you're passionate about

(WARNING THIS ONE IS LONG I SPENT WAY TOO LONG ANSWERING THIS ONE!)

Okay don't take my word for it because I'm a stupid 16 year old boy, but i always ALWAYS get fucking pissed when it comes to the way adults treat kids.

And i know that there are many adults that don't do this, but ESPECIALLY teachers and parents i think tend to do this thing where THEY DON'T RESPECT US AS PEOPLE.

And I'm not talking like they don't think we're people bc yeah we exist kinda hard to erase the existence of children, but i mean they don't respect the fact that we have knowledge, that we're smart, that we have opinions that differ from the norm, and that we can be educated on certain subjects!

For example: I'm a writer. I know the whole process of just getting your work out there (something that is essential to growth) and having my writing read. My parents know that i want to be a writer when i grow up and they know that i post my writing online. My dad and me went on a car ride and THE ENTIRE TIME HE LECTURED ME ON HOW I COULD START GETTING MY WORK OUT THERE.

He went through the whole thing of writing a chapter and editing it and giving it to a beta reader to look over and then editing it further and then moving on (something that i ALREADY DO) and I EVEN EXPLAINED TO HIM BEFORE HAND THAT I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING!!

I love my parents dgmw but sometimes adults just patronize me to the point where i feel like I'm not allowed to talk about certain things with them- that I'm not allowed to have an intelligent conversation with them without being told i don't know what I'm talking about. I'm about a year away from being a full fledged adult of 18 and i am STILL treated like I'm a dumb 12 year old that has no idea what the word "concoction" means.

And it goes beyond just adults in general and it extends to our fucking CURICULAM!

Doing online school and given a short story to read- a story which doesn't have a lot of foreign or complex vocabulary just a complex wording of things- ASKING ME TO POINT OUT LIKE 10 WORDS I DIDN'T RECOGNIZE LIKE BITCH I KNOW WHAT FLAMBOYANT MEANS DO YOU THINK I AM THREE?! IS THAT WHAT IT IS?!

And beyond that i get further treated as a child because of my mental disabilities. I have it a lot easier than some people of course and i don't speak for everyone, but every adult i have ever met (save for a select few) have completely disregarded my adhd and brushed it under the rug. So when i physically cannot bring myself to read something or to focus on something or if i can't remember something said to me less than three minutes ago, I'm treated like a dumb lazy idiot that isn't trying hard enough/I'm using my disorder as an excuse/I'm letting my disorder stop me. LIKE YEAH IT'S STOPPING NE FROM BEING NORMAL!! THAT'S WHAT IT DOES!!

And its even more debilitating when I'm told if i just "try hard enough" that i can function like everyone else does and i see people passing classes with zero effort and I'm failing it while expending all my energy just to stop from breaking down in the middle of class because i know I'm gonna mess this up too.

No one respects us kids fir what we really are, no one thinks that we have it hard because they think they have it harder, they tell us "you think high school is hard? Wait until you're an adult!" Well at least when I'm an adult people will listen to me when i tell them I'm tired. At least they'll listen when i say i can't keep going on like this. At least they'll listen when i say i know a lot about something. At least when I'm an adult people will fucking respect me.

Sorry this was so long. And I'm fine btw i just get really angry and passionate when talking about this. I could probably keep talking for another like hour though ngl.