#ngl i kinda hate this thing now
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The worst scene in The Tyrant's Tomb EVER!!!!!!11!1!
#!cheese arts#Lol first ToA post in a while#i think this is a thing now where I draw apollo every few months and disintegrate.#trials of apollo#toa#apollo toa#lester toa#lester papadopoulos#pjo hoo toa#percy jackson#percy jackson and the olympians#vro so many tags 😿😿😿#toa fanart#Oh yea gotta tag the other guys#meg mccaffrey#reyna avila ramirez arellano#I HATE MY LIFE!!! ❤️❤️#This was supposed to be a funny doodle if it looks bad pretend it looks rlly good#also if this gets 20 notes i'll reread the first book /slash jay (??)#i kinda wanna reread it ngl#i'm reading other things so#i'll consider it 😇😇
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chewing on my hands no curly did not need to fucking murder jimmy to protect Anya. He wouldn't, not Just because of the fact murder even in self defense is deeply distressing and therefore. Y'know a last resort (and Jimmy is his friend. I am curious how long Jimmy's weird resentment has existed and if it was ever obvious before the events of the game but I'm getting off track) but also. Anya LITERALLY SAYS "I have to believe our worst moments don't make us monsters" like I'm not saying she's at all okay w what jimmy did but like!!!
She's VERY OBVIOUSLY conflicted and coping! She DOESNT want him dead (well maybe she does but I don't think it's something she thinks would actually be an easy fix. She doesn't want it Logically bc the situation is. Y'know it's a spaceship w 5 ppl and he's the fuckin co pilot)
CURLY COULDVE STILL DONE MORE AND HANDLED THE SITUATION BETTER!!! Personal opinion he didn't realize it was SA and/or didn't realize how traumatic it was for Anya until she brought up pregnancy and its a mix of genuine and willful ignorance (which Logically Makes Sense but is still not an excuse) but like. He says himself she doesn't get psych evaluations!
Murder is not an easy solution! Some survivors/victims want their abusers to die and that's its own discussion, but even beyond morality and ethics: thats 20% of the fucking staff on this stupid ship!
There's a longer post to be made about the fact capitalism is the ultimate enabler of these issues and dynamics, because the combination of isolation, small crew size, complete abscence of support, disregard for employee safety and physical danger all contributed to the fact this Could Happen and the fact this Is Such A Fucking Hard Situation even if you always prioritize the victim bc. Anya's safety is threatened either way- letting Jimmy do Whatever is obviously dangerous, but also HES THE CO PILOT! The events of the game are literally an example of why you NEED A CO PILOT (though in game he's fucking. Shit at his job which y'know) because you need redundancies to make sure you arent Completely reliant on one person (like. Imagine if Anya got seriously injured. There goes the medical staff. Maybe the others have basic training but Jesus Christ being the ONLY medical expert on staff. And even then iirc she's a nurse which not to downplay the work that goes into that but it is fundamentally one of MULTIPLE medical jobs and only having A Nurse is. FOR OVER A YEAR OF TRAVEL GOOD LORD THIS IS A NIGHTMARE) anyways. Longer post by someone smarter Abt how even though jimmy is an awful person a lot of the harm he does is only possible bc of a combination of The Situation (isolation + small group) and His Power (social power as a man over the One Woman and power as the second in command)
This post got away from me bc this game makes me think a lot but what I actually wanted to say is: Curly could have done more by being more present for Anya and being more Aware of Jimmy's actions (and intervening to make sure he isn't able to interact with Anya in isolated settings). Like I also think straight up murder isn't an ideal solution but like. There's a lot of fucking THINGS YOU CAN DO TO SUPPORT VICTIMS THAT ARENT MURDER
In the end I think it's a consequence of basing the approach on punishing the aggressor rather than supporting the victim, because like. It's less important to Kill Jimmy (no matter how much you want to) and way more important to KEEP ANYA SAFE
#Mouthwashing spoilers#NGL the jimmy hate posts. Like I get it. But also feels like they still forget the fact that hey#His victim is also there like. Yeah Jimmy sucks but killing him doesn't un traumatize Anya#Also something to say about how she overdosed like. Aughhh#Also I kinda get ppl saying Swansea didn't act until Daisuke got injured but again. I don't think Anya wanted jimmy dead#(tho I remember now she talks Abt the gun for protection- I don't think she'd want him dead outside of like self defense#Like. Unless he is trying to attack her again y'know. Or even she could just have the gun as a Threat without wanting to use it.#ANYWAY I do think Swansea couldve likely done more but I also think that More isn't necessarily violent#Idk I feel like ppl project violent desires onto victims which may be accurate in some cases but is not universal#Anyway idk where I'm going. AU where the only thing Anya has to worry about is Daisuke being better at her at boardgames
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2023 Las Vegas Grand Prix - Qualifiying - Fernando Alonso
#half asleep making these istg#yayyyy p9? idk ig i expected him to do better#old man asleep at the wheel whats new 😴#he was very quick w this interview i wonder if he was eager to get to bed#i certainly am rn#f1#formula 1#fernando alonso#2023 las vegas gp#(i wish i could atop feeling insecure abt my gifs. i do it for fun.)#(of course i want them to look somewhat good but i get a bit ill over it)#(there was somw drama on here at some point that made me want to completely stop posting then ngl)#(cause like what is the point if im not as good as others ig :/ this is kinda vague posting but it made me so uncomfortable)#(as i said. i do it for fun in quick time bcs yay jsut wanna post smth i found cute)#(but ever sincce that thing happened its just made me extremely self critical and insecure abt posting)#(idk why im saying this. kinda repressing the urge tk be like 'SRY THESE ARE TERRIBLE. YEAH.')#(i need to sleep. but i often feel like this literally every time i post now bcs some people get on their high horse and ruin people's fun)#(iykyk ig. its smth bothering me lately. but i hate to act so morose. but i still feel bad abt the quality sometimes. i guess.)#we do a little bit of f1
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attempt no. 2 at making hair
#mullet kel......#unironically my favorite hairstyle of his was when he had the (accidental) mullet#he hated it but personally. i was a fan.#ngl making hairs is actually kind of fun#i realized this morning that i've been using blender/doing renders for almost 4 years now#it's about time i learn how to mesh shit lol#i put it off bc i hate trying to make things work in game but i've p much abandoned sims at this point like. i am fully a blender guy now#if i can make something & it works in blender. that's all that matters to me.#kinda thinkin i might remake some of my super old renders of the kiddos#i've remade a couple but none of the reeeeaaally old ones#it's kinda fun to go back & look at em & see how much i've learned since then#n e way.#rainyrambles
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Update 2: the germaphobia didn't win bc he sneezed so hard he cried kinda and I can't not hug the people I like when there's tears so that's where we're at now lmao I'm literally so fucked but at least I'm not doing anything the next week 😭 checked him over since caution has been thrown to the wind, dude for sure has the flu but I'm hoping I can dodge it bc I got vaccinated so fingers crossed there. Ran out of tissues, so he's resorted to napkins and his jacket which isn't nearly as hot irl as it is in fic, but this is what it's come to 😔 also he's gone through three more masks and I'm lowkey scared he's gonna run out of those too 😭😭
#kinda snz again#how am i supposed to tag this actually#obs? is that what people call it??#idk#anyway#I'm not actually that worried about runn out of masks bc we have so fucking many and also i bring my own#i am worried about him getting me sick tho but it seems unavoidable at this point 😔#i feel so bad for him but I'm still disgusted ngl#dude has a hell of a fever like you hate to see it#had to go sit in the back where we put the patients so he could lay down for a bit and try to nap#bro literally sounds worse and worse as the hours go by it's fucking horrific#i fr feel like a mom rn patting this dude's back and getting him shit smh#like I'm the mom friend always so it tracks but doing vaguely medical things @ someone who has a higher scope than me is wild lmao#also for the record my partner isn't antivax he just planned on getting them closer to the end of the month#that's not working out so well for him now but it's not like he wasn't gonna get them at all so there's that at least lmao
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The feminism leaving my body anytime Eilisha from Love Island Australia
#the second hand embarrassment yikes tell me you are not a girls girl !!#I support women’s rights and wrongs but not when it comes to hating on other woman for a MAN you met like. maybe 24 hours ago!!! ma’am !#Em so much better than me because I would have had things to SAY#Praying on Hannah’s downfall now too actually and Xanthe on thin ice only care for em Mimi and Sophie the real ones#anyways it’s good so far ngl I don’t like any of the men lol but we’ll wait and see ig….#the only one I sort of found nice is Taylor but that comment of wanting to fuse them together was kinda weird#but also he lowkey was dealing with Eilisha so I can’t blame him much on that ig#i fear Em and Mimi are too much for this boys 🤷♀️#love island australia#love island
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this is a test
#i’m bored i just wanna see how many words i can put in the tags like will it just keep going on forever or will they stop me like i know th#the tag limit is 30 ok so the iindividual tag limit is 140 characters that’s actually so rude i wanted to keep going forever and see how lo#g this could be but i guess we can do this 30 times ok what the flip should i talk about hm i was playing the guitar today but i rage quit#ause the song was hard and hurting my fingers! ermmmmm it was sunny ok this is boring let’s think of more exciting things to type hmmm acco#ding to all known laws of aviation- jk i’m not doing the bee movie script but can you imagine i think that would be funny hmmmmm words i lo#e podcasts so bad that’s a fact no one has ever know before my blog definitely isn’t all about audio dramas the people are definitely not a#ready aware of this jesus christ this is only the seventh one of these this is actually quite a lot of space i underestimated how much i ha#e to type btw there’s probably spelling mistakes in here somewhere or autocorrect has been annoying but i cba to retype anything so i don’t#care lolllllllllllll how do you feel about oscar malevolent i feel a normal amount actually (lie) yk what i really miss sam and colin alrea#y like i’m actually not okay i really hope we hear from sam again in s2 and also colin ngl i hope ur in the computers soz or not dead miss#im like a bastard my paranoid it king ok erm im running out of things to say um heartstopper s3 was crazy good i cried lmao i love gay peop#e so much it’s crazy i hope it gets renewed for s4 i need to reread the comics lowkey and the books they’re all so talented for being so yo#ng it scares me ngl !!!!!! the tmagp hiatus is getting to me slightly like february in reality is soon and not that far away for how podcas#ts go but seriously how am i supposed to live until then without knowing what happened. please colin be alive. ive only just realised i can#use fills stops. sorry that’s made everything a bit messy. i should’ve been doing this before. whoops. anyways. hi mutuals i love you all s#much i hope you enjoy my rambles and shitposts cause i enjoy yours very much! never think you’re being annoying i literally don’t care be a#annoying as you want posts as much as you want i am ur biggest fan <3 im getting a bit fatigued from typing like my mind is blank basically#now it’s just turned into a. stream of consciousness but i don’t really have any thoughts to put here idk if we’re halfway ermmmm omg it’s#lmost halloween how crazy is that time is flying by i kinda forgot it was october lmao. it’s wild how it’s basically almost christmas. like#what. that’s illegal. how is it wintertime again. what the flip. i miss summer already take me backkkkkkk. i hope my phone doesn’t crash or#smth cause i’ve not saved this as a draft and i cba to do any of this again. maybe i should save it. ok i will when i reach the next tag bc#ok it stopped me but i’ve saved it and holy jesus it’s a lot of text im just sat here giggling there’s really no point to any of this other#than me being bored sooooooooooooooooo (imagine if i just did the letter o for every character wouldn’t that be crazy) so wait there’s 140#haracters and 30 tags so what’s 30 x 140. someone hurry. i haven’t done maths lessons in two and a half years i’ve forgotten everything wai#let me get the calculator app ok im back it said 4100 characters so. i dont know how many words that roughly is but its. a decent amount. o#what the flip why am i wasting tag space with maths. i hate maths. my screen time has been actually soooooooooo bad recently like damn some#one put my phone in a block of ice please joshua gillespie style. my mind is running out of things to say. do i talk about myself. im james#im 18 which is weird cause wdym im an adult go away. ive run out of facts. i love podcasts and procedural dramas that stupid firefighter sh#w is my life unfortunately. i think chappell roan should be the queen of england instead of king charles. i dont like having a king cause#ho needs men in power not me. ok um this is the last tag equal rights for all. yolo. the time will pass anyways! thank u boredom ok bye gn:
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Cleaned out an old ppg lipgloss palette from my childhood and made it a gouache palette
#ngl kinda hate these colors lmao#might tweak it later on#also I have been procrastinating cleaning this thing for like 3 years now#powerpuff girls#ppg#rambles
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Lowkey a good picture from Subz stream today
#sorry I literally take pictures of my laptop screen w my phone when I get excited lmao#i habe like 30 combined from Subz and Roshambo today lmao#I came across this one while cleaning them out! I went ooo kinda ate ngl#lifesteal smp#itzsubz#ok now I would like everyone to know that when I am watching a stream I WILL be giving my roommate the highlights real#and today I didn’t even have to say anything they just looked over and went ‘THAT is a SLUT’ LMAOOOO#shoutout my roommate they’re awesome#we used to hate each other in high school. things changed <33#HE WAS SO RIGHT TO LEAVE THE CROSS NECKLACE ON BTW <333 ATE W THAT ONE
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Vent post ahead that may change your view on me and that may sound dramatic (NOT DIRECTED AT ANYONE, THIS IS JUST IN GENERAL) Mostly just to get out my feelings. I only ask that if you look, to be kind and understanding and patient. Also the tags are silly and id appreciate if you read em. id appreciate if you didnt ask me anything on it
I feel toxic sometimes because i can get so jealous i borderline gatekeep things and I always feel so bad because its never intentional but then I end up hating myself because I know its unhealthy and irrational but I cant help it, and I know im so lucky and have a lot in many senses of the word, but at times it feels like they can be taking everything, because when I like someone or something, they tend to matter a fuck-ton to me. Im sorry to anyone ive lashed out at a bit for them wanting what I have, I really am. Its not coming from a place of hostility, rather a place of trauma responses and hyperfixation that stem from my adhd and autism but like when I try something and it goes great, and then someone else is like "OOH thats awesome I wanna do that too" It feels almost like when Im finally happy or excited or proud to have something, someone comes and takes it. Usually Ill play it off as a joke, but in reality, its complete honesty that im trying to soften so I dont upset anyone, especially when its over fiction or a person, because I do NOT own them and I know that, but it bothers me when someone swoops in to do the exact same things or even one-up especially when its really soon after me, and since my self worth is already abysmal, it just makes me feel worse, like I should be lucky to have what I do to begin with, but I feel the need to hold it close to me and protect it so I dont lose things that make me really happy.
Recently Ive even started reverse gatekeeping in response to others, where ill just tell myself I cant or dont deserve to have anything special because I'm not, and only others can enjoy this. But thats why people making me ship content makes me so happy. Its dumb to get jealous over others selfshipping with a character I like. Its dumb to get upset over someone I know copying or taking heavy inspiration from one of my ideas. Its dumb to get possessive over someone else trying to befriend my new awesome friends or wife/wives. I rarely selfship anymore due to my reverse gatekeeping and instead serve the others who simp or enjoy content. I provide since I feel I cant take. It makes me happy and distracts me. But the moment someone else does something similar to what is my toxic coping mechanism for my toxic coping mechanism, it only hurts worse. Thats why sometimes, for example, I get a bit snappy when someone else provides gummybunny (that and also shipping jealousy sometimes). Thats why I get snappy when I make a friend someone else super cool and then another person comes in and wants to befriend them (No darken, this wasnt directed at you, its happened more than once with more than one person but I know how you tend to assume). I LOVE giving but I hate sharing, because all my life whenever I shared, I lost something.
Introduce a friend to a friend? They leave me behind for eachother. Let someone wear my fitbit because they wanted to feel "rich"? It got stolen. Give money to someone in a "rough spot" who promised to repay me somehow? Never saw them again. I was always so trusting and understanding, and I always made excuses for others. Always so naive and gullible. So much so, in fact, that in elementary I kept letting my bullies pretend to be my friends when they claimed they changed, and let them destroy any ounce of worth I had whatsoever. Things that make me happy I CHERISH because of all the things ive lost and all my experiences. Ive never been hit, not once, but the abuse all my life came emotionally and mentally, and I only recently realized through therapy. Now its hard to trust people in certain situations. Sorry for my probably hard to follow and melodramatic rant.
sorry im dumb haha
#tw vent#By the time I finished writing the post I was no longer a mess about it but im still gonna post it#I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD IF I SEE ANYONE APOLOGIZING FOR MY OWN ISSUES IM GONNA BE PISSED#yall read all the tags its beneficial lol#Ngl SOME of this jealousy hits hardest with Gummy#because Ill FINALLY get fed some simp food for myself#and then yk#theyll kinda show up and ask to receive the same stuff#or act jealous#gummy#babe I love you#BUT DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE YOU HAVE FEEDING YOU GUMMYBUNNY CONSTANTLY????#Like mine is rare and far between#and I dont draw much selfship unlike you#LET ME HAVE SOME THINGS DAMMIT#And then Darken over here when I get a cool new friend just like:#... is for me? 🥺👉👈#/nm for both things#im the embodiment of envy and greed arent I...#I hate upsetting people#I just keep it to myself and internalize my emotions mostly#haha now you guys know how possessive and jealous I am#its giving yandere 🥰💅✨🗣💃🕺😍😘😼🤠🤭😇🙄🤩😜😝🤑🧐😈#i regret my life choices right about now
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ugghhh wintertime sucks!! I'm sad and tired and sad all the time.. I need a nap.. and f/o cuddles.. and another nap..
#ash rambles 💚#negative#part of it is definitely the weather#it's so dark and dreary and i never wanna leave my bed#but also just. my mood akdjajs I'm kinda down in the dumps today#im recovering from being sick which always fucks me up#and i just cant shake this feeling of anxiety..? and i feel kinda a lot like my f/os wouldnt like me or would fall out of love or never see#me as more than a friend and other stuff like that#i.. actually got broken up with yesterday irl!#it wasnt messy. he said that this isnt what he wanted and it was fine and we're back to being pals. i wasnt sad at all in the moment and#i dont think i am now..? it's weird. we were laughing like always literal minutes after having the chat. when we got together we said that#if things domt work out we wanna keep being friends. and we're doing just that. honestly i saw it coming and idek if i LOVE him anymore#what even does love feel like..? regardless I'm not upset or sad at my breakup since i saw it coming and I'm honestly happy he just. Talked#to me about it. we communicated and then three minutes later went back to talking about x.enoblade LMAAOO it was fun!#but it is ridiculous for me to expect to feel NOTHING at no longer being in a relationship. i cant just feel nothing. i dont feel sad per s#just... in my thoughts i guess? I don't think the feeling of my f/os not liking me stems from me being dumped though. i think thats just me#being me sjdjaksj I'm very insecure a lot of the time. i dont think being dumped helpd very much though LMAAAOO#I'm doing okay i promise. and I'll be alright. theres just both a lot and nothing going on at the same time and i feel... idk what i feel.#i hope my f/os love me 😭 i hope that a lot#and honestly i know this community is ass and I'm more than happy in my own corner with my couple of followers but. ngl I've really felt as#though I'm not valued here and all that junk as of late. yeah just.. i think everything is happening at the same time and I'm tired and#i feel like I'm a confused kiddo who doesnt know anything anymore BAHAHAHA#holy shit it just sounds like i need a shower and a nap huh- I'll be alright I'm just. dealing with stuff akdjsks but i also hate to always#bring the mood down like this! i always try my best to be haha silly and all that shit. I'm just gonna try to daydream about f/o cuddles#(and try to convince myself they dont hate me ofc)#oh and. i know i mentioned this but. i hate the weather. so much. I'm sad all the time. November is actually my least favorite month too 😭#I've gotta study a lot today and I'll try to sneak in some k.urohyou and hopefully start watching monster too but yeah i apolgize if#I'm acting off these days ajdjajs I'm very stuck in my own mind these days. not exactly the most fun place to be 😭#delete later#i mean akdjajs i literally started crying the other day because my friend said that my husband (k.yohei) loves me ajdkahdb come on ash..
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typing lessons >:|
#just me hi#i hate typing lessons >:(#i was doing fine yesterday and then today my fingers are all awkward again hrhghgrhhg#this is honestly inhumane. girl help me i'm diyingggh#/though since the website has dictation i'm allowed to wear my headphones while doing the typing so i've been listening to music :)#it's the only thing keeping me sane ngl fvhshd#/yea my typing kinda sucks. but this sucks more#/keep telling myself 'we'll get better it's fine it's inevitable Whatever' while i miSS THE W FIVE TIMMMESSSS#decay and destruction and despair and the rending of their car whoever thought of this#/i hate it when my hands feel awkward!!! makes me feel like i'm 3 years old again and can't explain why i am SO upset about this fhvbshf#/frustrattttinnnngggggggg auhguh#//okay. dramatics over. i will finish my 30 minutes typing lesson now. peace love and prosperity to everyone but the people who brought#about this specific kind of suffering <33#(i say while being dramatic)
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Ship of theseus ass friendship
#reflecting on one of my longest friendships and how it has changed over the years today#brought to you by i miss her and summer is our time to see each other but weve seen each other maybe 3 times :(#of nothing about our friendship is like it was when we were kids is it still the same friendship#if we used to be super close now we're distant but always there is it the same friendship#if we used to explain everything to each other now we never talk about deep stuff#if i used to be embarassed to go ring her doorbell to go to the beach now i ring it just to see if shes there#if we used to know things about each other bc our moms told us now we tell each other before our moms#idk man i kinda miss what we used to have but i wouldnt go back for anything lol#also i think the relationship we have now is way more healthy that the one we had as kids#like it didnt end up being toxic bc we stopped talking and seeing each other for like 3 years#and honestly that saved our friendship ngl im so glad it happened but at the same time i hate we had to lose so much time#mine#friends
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Glass Onion really was just me yelling about how stupid Miles is the entire time and then feeling the satisfaction when the other characters realized it too
#I was on the miles hate train from the moment I saw him but also when he said the mona lisa’s smile appears and disappears I was so pissed#like yes the meaning of the mona lisa’s smile changes every time you look at it I can get behind that#but the smile itself does not disappear!!!!! the restoration of her smile was like a whole thing!!!! what the fuck are you talking about!!!’#‘that is the Aegean sea’ one of my favorite lines ngl#glass onion#glass onion spoilers#technically I guess?#ok spoilers starting here#also I can’t have been the only one who realized that the handwriting on the envelope that said ‘love andi’#was the same as the handwriting on the invitation that said ‘love miles’#bro couldn’t even get original with that#love the fact that blanc didn’t even get the chance to solve the puzzles so he just trashed them to miles’ face just cause he could#an icon honestly#also I truly don’t think that’s how allergic reactions work like he would not have just died that quickly but I guess it must have been bad#also also for the record I called the allergic reaction thing from the second he dropped cause why else would they mention that#to be fair I fully thought that the fruit in his drink was a straight up pineapple so I am kinda dumb but it did remind me of the allergy so#helen brand you will always be famous#anyways i’ll shut up now#autism (mads) speaks
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#Ngl having a rough time of it lately#I’m sad and stressed and scared#Pr*ject 2025 has me really really scared#I’ve always known there were people who#hate the things I am#(queer kinky and sex-positive to name a few)#but now it feels like those might actually be#recriminalized in my lifetime#I’m terrified of the thought#of suddenly living under leadership#that is literally calling for people like me#to be labeled as perverts and criminals and jailed#or worse#Will I be safe?#Will I have to hide and cut away pieces of myself#that I’ve fought so hard to claim?#Fuck man I’m just scared and feeling#kinda helpless rn
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yeah fully agreed on how they have their bad moments even during the series where theyre at their best but the tumblr users that love team rocket despite not watching the show since they were kids would crucify me for saying they were bad during the earlier series too LMAO
HDHDHDHDHDHDHFHDFFUDJDUDD NO UR RIGHT…. i think its easier to forgive those earlier moments bc tbf, they fix my indigo league criticism by johto bc i think they instantly get put on stand duty. (also there were several reasons that league was total ass for the most part and most of it comes down to “its the first one”) i think their behavior during the kanto league was too much even for their most diehard fans at the time. but boy does it get harder and harder and harder to like them the more that happens bc that overall issue of TR hogging really took a while to die. even after they stopped being a requirement for each episode it was a straight up plague in XY
#altho if i can be a biiit of a contrarian…. ngl i didnt even like TR as a kid#i liked their focus eps a lot but even then i kinda took them as a once in a while novelty#even at the time i thought them being in each episode was just annoying#also to go back to them not being the great gnc rep ppl think they are…. the transmisogynistic ash joke was literally kicked off by them#like its their idea#mail#moonscape#and it felt like i was doing ‘’the wrong thing’’ when i saw how beloved they were by queer fans online#like ‘’if you hate tr you hate queer people lol’’ was a common sentiment i remember#and now im like oh my god its total bullshit if you’ve actually seen the show. this show cant fucking handle girls wearing PANTS!!!!!!!!
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