#newjeans drabbles

[amourjins]

✦ LATE NIGHT WALK? — k.mj

summary. a late night walk with your best friend, minji! ..except, theres a twist.

pair. non-idol!bsf!minji x fem!reader

content ahead. fluff, (best) friends-to-lovers, wlw, GAYS!!!!, theyre both silly, just a small bit of texting!

notes. RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA who couldve guessed! surprise !! take this while you wait for tg…cause ive been procrastinating it a LOT…. (not proofread as we all know.. i proofread on a good day [which is never])

you lie awake in bed as the time read 12:37. you sighed, you didnt want to go to sleep, but you didnt have anything else to do, either.

until, that is, you felt your phone vibrate—a notification. you first shrugged it off, thinking it was some random app you didnt use anymore, but was way too lazy to delete it. after a few seconds, you decided to see what it was, and to your surprise, the notification was a text from your the one and only, kim minji! aka your best(est) friend (ever).

you could feel your tiredness just disappear all in the span of that minute.

you immediately got up from bed once you hearted the text, turning the lights on as you walked to your closet. you didnt want to keep minji waiting, so you figured you would just keep it casual with a shirt and jeans or something.

once you finally got ready, you did some finishing touches before grabbing your phone and bag, and dashing out of there excitedly. when you exited your apartment complex, there she was, in all her glory—minji!

“minji-ah!” you whisper-shouted as you swore she turned her head to you in the blink of an eye. she took her hands out of her pockets and waved at you, smiling brightly. you rushed over, embracing her in a hug as she froze, blushing a little.

“hi!—” she giggled before hugging you back tightly. you let go after a few seconds, making her pout. you didnt notice, though. you were too busy looking around the streets of seoul, wondering where you two should head first.

“mm, follow me!” you spoke, which caught the tall girl off guard, but she immediately followed after you, catching up as she walked beside you. the night sky always had you mesmerized.. but there something—someone else that had you even more mesmerized.

and it was minji.

maybe you started to develop feelings for her over these past few months with her…

you were pretty much certain that she didnt like you back. and as much as that hurt, you had to deal with it. being best friends with her is enough already, and youre grateful. but at the same time, what if she liked you back? it would.. yeah itd probably hurt to confess. but it was now or never, right? now just seemed like the perfect moment.

“crosswalk, idiot!” she reminded as she halted your movements, making you snap out of your thoughts. “oops!.. sorry,” you looked away in embarrassment as she scoffed jokingly.

you silently turned your head back to her. she was looking at the sky, and the scenery around. god, she was insanely pretty. prettier than the scenery around. prettier than anything around.

you tapped her shoulder to get her attention once you were able to cross as you two crossed the street together. your hands suddenly brushed against each other slightly, and even that made minji blush.. you were both equally down bad for each other!

once at the other side, minji’s fingers crawled on your palm before she interlocked her hand with yours, the action making you stunned, but, you werent complaining. who would?

“all the stores are closed.. aw,” minji sighed, pointing at the stores to your left as you two walked past them after a few seconds. “but you know, the convenience stores are still open.” you spoke, as she let out an agreeing “oohh..” followed by a nod. “lets head there then? hope you dont mind the walk though..” she smiled. “as long as im with you, i wouldnt mind at all!” you grinned.

after a short 12 minutes of walking and talking, you guys finally arrived at the convenience store while still holding hands. minji was the first to step in as you came in right after, greeting the staff that stood at the register.

“so, yn..i have, uh,, something to tell you.” minji explained as you two walked out of the convenience store. you and minji spent a decent amount of time in there, talking while having snacks. you two had a great time, and she even paid for everything.. and when you thought you couldnt crush on her more than before.

“oh,” you gulped, suddenly nervous and sweat was trickling down your forehead as you nodded, “i have.. something to tell to you.. as well?” you questioned—yourself. she took a deep breath before continuing, “lets say it at the same time?

“yeah. same time.. same time,” you breathed.

“on 1, okay?”

“3 - 2 - 1–”

“i like you, yn!”

“i like you!”

“wait, what?” you awkwardly giggled, raising an eyebrow at minji. she had her head turned, obviously away from you. her face was bright red…and so was yours.

“..y—youre for real?” minji muttered, not daring to make eye contact. she was looking everywhere but your direction. “what do you think, idiot?” you joked.

“so,, were dating now, right?”

“yeah.. yeah!”

“ill walk you home then?”

“thats absurd, kim minji! spend more time with your new girlfriend, will you?”

“g-girlfriend.. right! yes, okay.”

a/n : 😁😁 send in asks interact with me maybe! ill be answering asks later

[ddoxhan]

another life

I know I would love to just do laundry, take a walk in the park with you. in another life, I promise, we will.

word count : 0.5k words

genre : angst, fluff(?); two people who were each others' world and fate was against them; squint real real hard for that miniscule fluff; minji x gn! reader

t/w : none :)

a/n : newjeans world domination, and they've dominated me. SUMMERJEANS COMING SOON I'M EXCITED TO HYPERVENTILATE AND GAY PANIC OVER WHATEVER THEY'RE GONNA DROP.

to my dearest, I finally have the courage to tell you whatever I'm feeling for you. yet, I never had the chance to tell you in person. maybe I should have just sent you that text at midnight, maybe I should have told you about my feelings when we walked side by side at the park. maybe, but I didn't. was I a fool? I don't know, but I wasn't too sure about what I felt was right, was appropriate.

I didn't deserve you, who brightened up my life with her shine. the one who picked me up from my bottomless pit, showing me that there was no such thing as endless agony. the one who stuck by me even when I was closed off and hurt you multiple times, too many times, which I still regret till this day.

I was selfish, for wanting both your attention only on me, yet wanting you away from me because I was poison. you would do just fine without me, but I'd struggle to the ends of earth without you. I want you to be happy, but it didn't seem like you would be when I'm around.

if you were to be with me, I would be nothing but a burden, someone who couldn't make you smile. I live to see that bright smile of yours, for sure I don't have the right to take it away. but at that time, I didn't know you reciprocated my feelings, and I admit that I was dense to notice it. it's not every day that I receive affection and love, I wasn't raised in an environment like that.

receiving affection, made life so much better. receiving affection from you, made my life the best it could ever be. and I feel really grateful that I had someone like you in my life, someone who didn't mind my scars, my pain, just embracing me for who I am, what I am, and what I would be no matter what. I'd give anything to have you back. it didn't matter what it would take, because I have nothing further more to lose. wishing that I could turn back time every midnight, I know we are past that point of our lives, our time.

I know I would love to just do laundry, take a walk in the park with you. hold hands as we stroll in the night, share kisses under the lamp post, cuddle in bed on a sunday morning. it may have not been this life, but in another life, I promise, we will. there will always be a day where we'd be in each other's arms, whispering I love you's. a day where I open my eyes from my slumber and I have all the time to admire those features of yours, falling in love again and again with you.

tell me you're waiting, tell me you still like me, still love me. when I find you again, look at me with that same gummy smile you gave me when we first met. and say,

'I've waited for you, my love.'

because when I see you again, there will be nothing between us, just you and I. under that cherry blossom tree, where I first fell for you.

I love you, minji, more than you think.

[minimultiestfandoms]

˜”*°• *.* ˜”*°• ! newjeans masterlist ! •°*”˜ *.* •°*”˜

——————————————————————————

| Headcanons |

NewJeans as girlfriends! (solo headcanons)

Minji | Hanni | Danielle | Haerin | Hyein

Nothing Yet!

| Reactions |

Nothing Yet!

| Fake Texts |

Nothing Yet!

| Drabbles |

Nothing Yet !

| Series |

Nothing Yet!

| Timestamps |

Nothing Yet!

[loviestoki]

𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝑀𝑜𝑜𝑛.

Summary: You never expected to fall in love with your best friend.

Warnings: None

A/N: This is my first time writing in this format so pls give constructive criticism where u see fits! I'm also open to suggestions and reqs ^^ (gn!reader but I intended ts to be wlw)

The first time you met Minji was over a year ago. You had fallen down in a rush trying to find your class and scraped your knee, your vision blurring with tears as a hand came into view, a cheery smile awaiting you as you slowly lifted your head up to see who the person in front of you was. She tended tentatively to your wound, applying the cheap ointment the nurse had given her onto it and securing a bandage over it. In that moment, you could have sworn she was the sun.

From then on, you couldn't help but notice how the second she entered a room the atmosphere became cheerful, how her eyes would light up like a bright flame each time they locked on you, and how could you ignore the way your temperature would rise causing an all too familiar flush to appear on your cheeks as your hands intertwined while the two of you made your way to class? Minji was a bright summer day, not too hot, her perfect hair a nice breeze to balance the humidity of your life. Minji's laugh was the loud crashing of waves on the beach as kids laughed and played. Her eyes were the rising sun that marked a new day. She was the one thing you knew you could count on each waking morning because as long as the sun rose, she would be there.

It was innocent at first. Who doesn't admire their friends? But as the two of you grew closer, your mind began to change. Minji wasn't the sun; rather, she was the moon shining down gently on the world, a silent but comforting presence amidst the chaos of your daily life. She was the gentle crashing of waves; her smile dictating the cycles of the ocean within your heart. A soothing presence was what she was. "Hey, are you listening to me?" Her words snapped you out of your thoughts. Those beautiful, tender eyes, finding your own as you realize she isn't just a friend either. She's the love of your life.

[strawberrycheeks-and-glasses]

You Don’t Even Know My Name

Tsukishima x You Drabbles (on ao3)

Rated 18+ MDNI | female reader

“You’re such an asshole,” you grunt through your teeth.

He’s got you pinned up against the wall in bathroom of the club he works at. The deep bass of the music vibrating through the walls, tickling your hard nipples as he presses his hips against your ass.

“That’s the name of the game, babe,” he laughs in your ear, licking up the curve and breathing heavily into your hair.

The club is called ‘@hole,’ pronounced asshole, and is the first of its kind where the bartenders insult you and the dancers flip you off, a dumb gag to attract tourists. And all night, while your group of college friends kept ordering drinks, he would make snarky comments to you. Calling you dirty little whores for taking down three shots, one after the other. Saying that your mouth is open for business.

“Fuck you,” you grunt, rolling your hips back on his hard cock.

He had cornered you in the hallway on your way to the bathroom and shoved you into the single stall. You had been eye fucking him all night, matching his snark and playing along, almost begging him to find you in the dark hallway.

“Is this what you wanted, huh? For me to fuck you in this disgusting club?”

You feel his teeth sink into your bare shoulder as he grinds his dick between your clothed ass cheeks. The fabric stunting the friction you so desperately crave.

“Fucking get on with it,” you spit, grasping behind you at the waistband of his tight jeans, urging him to take you right here.

“Shut the fuck up, you little slut,” he growls again. “I’m going to fuck you so good, you’ll forget your own name.”

Panting against the cold stone wall, you hear him undo his pants and then his hands are on your thighs, dragging them up, agonizingly slow, under your skirt. Your panties are already soaking wet as he pulls the thin fabric aside.

“Fuck, you’re already dripping for me aren’t you, you fucking whore,” he groans as you feel his fingers slide through your wet slit, rubbing your lips and jutting his long middle finger inside of you.

“Fuck,” you breathe agains the wall, your lips dragging down the flat surface as you tense around his finger. “Hurry up, and fuck me,” you moan, unable to wait any longer.

“Think you can handle it? Your sweet little pussy feels so tight around my finger,” he muses, licking the teeth marks he left behind on your shoulder.

“Fuck. Me. Asshole,” you annunciate, rolling your hips back with each word.

“Oh, you’ve done it now, slut,” he growls in your ear, coating his rock hard cock with your slick from his fingers and lining his tip up to your hole.

Without any hesitation he thrusts his entire cock into you, forcefully shoving in every inch, to the base. You yelp and clench around him, hearing him groan behind you.

“Yes,” you breathe, pounding the wall with your fists as he pulls out and fucks you harder against the wall.

You feel a hot wave of pleasure building in the pit of your stomach as he slams into you over and over. One hand lifting your thigh up to fuck you deeper, the other laced between your fingers as you press into the wall.

Arching your back, your head falls onto his shoulder and he kisses your parted lips, wet and messy as he licks the moans out of your mouth.

“Fuck me harder,” you beg as his hips slap against yours. The lewd sounds being swallowed up but the loud music in the background.

“Don’t tell me what to do, you slut. You’ll take what I give you,” he hisses, turning you around to face him. His hands fall from your hips to grab your ass and lift you up to wrap your legs around his waist.

Shoving himself back into you, deep and hard, you gasp against his lips. Letting him bounce you on his cock as you pull at his long blond locks, turning his head to press hot, wet kisses on his neck, moaning into his skin.

“Kei,” he mumbles, groaning as you clench around him, so close to your climax.

“Wha?” Your brain can’t comprehend what he said as he fucks you so good back into the wall.

“My name,” he pants. “Say it. I wanna hear you scream my name when I make you cum.”

Your eyelids flutter as he shifts your hips, pressing against the sweet spot inside of you, trying to will your mind to form the letters of his name on your lips.

“Kei,” you moan in his ear. Feeling his hips thrust faster and deeper inside of you as he grips your hips, you feel the pressure about to explode as his demands you to say his name again and again, hitting that deep spot inside of you each time you say it.

“Kei, I’m gonna-“ you shout, tightening around him as he feels his own orgasm rip through him.

Holding you in his arms, you huff a laugh, making him whip his head up and glare at you. “What the fuck is so funny?”

“You don’t even know my name,” you laugh, hopping off of him as you adjust your skirt.

“Yeah I do,” he smirks, pulling up his pants and buttoning them back up.

“Oh do you?” You smirk back at him, continuing to play his little game.

“Yeah,” he breathes. “Slut,” he winks at you.

“Fuck you,” you shake your head at him, thrusting your middle finger in the air as you unlock the door.

“You just did,” he calls after you.

“Come find me on the dance floor,” you say over your shoulder. “If you wanna know my name.”

Later on the dance floor, you feel familiar hands wrap around your waist from behind you. Leaning back into his chest, you let your head fall to his shoulder.

“So?” He whispers into your ear. “What’s your name?”

Running your fingers through his hair as you slowly dance against him, you close your eyes as your lips meet his, ignoring his question.

“Did I really fuck you so good, you forgot?” He laughs, gripping your hips and pulling you back into him even more.

“Shut up and dance,” you whisper, grinding on his already hard cock again.

[jnnul]

a phone that won’t ring

a/n: third time’s the charm? if this doesn’t post this time, u heard it here first: tumblr is homophobic 😤

word count: 1k

type: drabble/short story

tags: fluff, angst, i keep pretending like i know what it’s like to be an idol, they love each other so much but time is their biggest enemy fr fr

gif credits: @jigujellee​

it’s hard dating kim minji. it was like one day, she was just your girlfriend. the girl who would hold your hand and swing it a little too hard on walks by the han river until both of you lose your balance. the girl who would wrap you with her sweater because she had a possessive streak and she liked you wearing her clothing. the girl who would kiss you senseless when she had to leave for practice even though she promised to call you when she got back to the dorms.

and then the next, she was the unofficial leader of k-pop’s arguably hottest girl group.

soon, the girl who would turn on the strangest filters when she video called you to make you laugh turned into the girl who would organize her members together as they interacted with millions of fans all across the world.

minji always tries her best to make sure you don’t feel like you’ve fallen behind. she talks about you to her members. she mentions that a ‘friend’ bought her the beautiful necklace that a fan comments on when she’s on vlive. she always wears that necklace - no matter where she is. in every single of the thousands of pictures of minji at the airport, she’s wearing that necklace.

to the extent that people began spreading rumors that jungwon of enhypen and minji of newjeans were dating and that was their couple necklace. minji had laughed about it when she called you when those rumors first came out.

“i don’t think i’ve ever even been within ten feet of jungwon. people will say anything if you’re the same age as someone else. or honestly, if they just think you’re shippable with them. how ridiculous is that,” minji snorts as she fingers the sapphire necklace thoughtlessly.

you try to laugh, nodding as your mind wanders. “yeah. so ridiculous.”

that night, you spent a good three hours searching up jungwon and fall down a rabbit hole of jungwon x minji ships on tiktok. you try to ignore the sinking feeling in your stomach when you realize just how well jungwon and minji match each other.

leaders. thoughtful. kind. so incredibly beautiful.

you weren’t bad looking - you knew that. and you knew that minji loved every single part of you, no matter how much you got in your head about it. but it was different for her. she didn’t even think about things that deep.

“have you ever noticed how uneven my eyes are? it’s like they’re on separate floors on my face,” you said one day, as minji’s not on camera for a second because she’s washing her face after practice. minji ducks into frame, white foam still on her face from her cleanser as she looks at you incredulously.

“y/n, i don’t think so at all. honestly, i don’t even know what you’re talking about; your eyes look fine to me,” she says, before ducking out of frame once more to wash the rest of the foam off of her face. minji can still see that you’re not completely comforted yet and she holds up her phone at an incriminating angle, as though she was scrutinizing your face.

“y/n, i literally see the most beautiful pair of eyes that could ever exist. you’re too hard on yourself. i promise no one sees what you think that they do. all they see is how kind you are and how genuine you are,” minji says and she can see the small smile that you’re trying to fight away and she considers her girlfriend duties to be fulfilled. for the moment, at least.

but that was a year ago, before newjeans was formed and before you started seeing minji’s face more often on billboards than in the comfort of her arms on a quiet date in your apartment.

now, when you get insecure about the tiny little things you don’t like about yourself, you stare longingly at the phone that you’re waiting for to ring, hoping that your girlfriend will call and wash all your insecurities away.

she tries her best - she really does. minji calls you whenever she can, even if she has to call you at 3 in the morning in america so she can catch you before you head to class. she’ll send presents to your door instead of actually showing up because she doesn’t want to compromise your safety.

and she will never take off that necklace. that beautiful sapphire necklace that you gifted her on her 16th birthday, with your first paycheck. the one that has your initials carved into it on a tiny little dog tag that falls down her back.

but it feels a little colder in your apartment meant for love when minji isn’t there to shelter you in her arms and cover your eyes during scary movies. you can’t help but checking her location (which she had shared with you soon after she debuted) to see when she would get home. more often than not, you would fitfully fall asleep before you could see her arrive at home. and you watch a phone that won’t ring until ungodly hours.

when she does call, minji tries to be as lively and attentive as she was before she was being flown out to a different country almost everyday. but you can see the eye bags that give away just how hard she truly is working. and you force yourself to tell her goodbye before you really want to because you want her to get at least a couple hours of precious rest that she doesn’t get too often.

it’s all worth it, you try to tell yourself. when minji finally gets a couple hours where she isn’t forced to be doing something, and she manages to bundle herself up and sneak into your apartment, it is worth. even when she gets a call from her manager that she has to be at the hybe building within the next hour, while she can hold you, it’s worth it.

dating kim minji is hard. but it’s all worth it in the end. it has to be.

[nhularin]

I'm not gonna be the one to get hurt.

PAIRING bff!jay x reader GENRE angst/no comfort, best friends to strangers? highschool AU WARNINGS none WC 0.5k A/N this is for u @enluv

series masterlist

October 18, 1998

tension built as the weeks went by, each passing day filled with an ache that left you restless. your heart weighed heavy with unspoken words, your fear dominating every lingering thought. you both had been inseparable, being friends since kindergarten all the way to highschool. but everything changed when you realised your feelings for him

Every night now before bed, and when I wake up again

doubt and guilt consumed your every waking moment. you yearned for the courage to confess your feelings, to get everything off your chest, yet the fear of rejection clung onto your heart so tightly that it became suffocating. it was easier to stay hidden in the shadows than to risk losing your friendship completely.

Wait in silence, that's my way

its already ruined you furrowed your eyebrows

jay, perceptive as ever, could feel the walls between you two getting higher and thicker, pushing him further away. his heart grew heavy with worry as he watched your connection break apart right before his eyes. seeing you avoiding him broke his heart, yet the reason remained a mystery you were both too afraid to unravel.

finally, unable to bear the silence, Jay mustered up the courage to confront you, his voice laced with aching confusion. tears welled up in your eyes as you struggled to find the right words, the fear of emotions bursting out of you

"I thought we were best friends," Jay whispered, his voice betrayed by the anguish in his eyes. "Why are you pushing me away?"

tears streamed down your face, your voice barely a whisper as you tried to sort through the chaotic mess of emotions. "I'm sorry, Jay. I'm just so scared... scared of ruining what we have."

jay, his eyes brimming with understanding and hidden longing, reached out to wipe away your tears. "dont be," he murmured, his voice gentle and sincere and then said nothing.

jays silence spoke volumes, his heart guarded by your shared suffering. the truth hidden behind longing eyes and broken souls, unsaid and unfelt.

but with a heavy sigh, jay spoke up, shaking his head ever so slightly. "im sorry," he murmured, and it felt like a dagger piercing your heart. " im so sorry, yn ."

thats all you needed to confirm your worst nightmare

the world seemed to crumble around you as Jay's words sank in. the fears you had clung to, the doubts and worries that had held you captive at night, flooded your body. It was your worst nightmare coming true, a rejection that shattered your fragile heart into a thousand irreparable pieces

"its okay" you smiled, but you both know it wasn't sincere. "take care, okay jay? " that was the last thing you said before making your way out of the classroom, tears now staining your cheeks.

jay sighed and collapsed on a chair, face burried between his clammy hands coward, you're a coward

if only he had told you the truth.

[iphone18pham]

Best Friend's Sister

Disclaimers! Bad grammar, Not Proofread,Probs Cringe

Paring: Danielle x Hanni's sister!Reader

Masterlist: GG,   BG,

Genre: fluff, pretty short drabble

Synopsis: Your Hanni's sister visits her from Australia only to discover that one of her sister's members is your distant girlfriend.

requests are open!!!

You had stayed in Australia for school and had decided to come visit her sister in Seoul. Hanni was overjoyed to see you and couldn't wait to show you around the city and introduce you to her members. As you two were catching up, you noticed that one of the members, Danielle, seemed to be looking at you with recognition. Hanni couldn't help but wonder why Danielle was staring at you like that. Later that day, as everyone was sitting in the living room chatting, you revealed that you had been dating someone in Australia for the past year. She showed them a picture of her girlfriend, and to everyone's shock, it was Danielle. Hanni was stunned - she had no idea that her sister and her former member were in a relationship. The group was in disbelief, and they couldn't believe that they had been together for a year without anyone noticing. Danielle explained that they had met back in Australia and had been in a long-distance relationship ever since. You had decided to come to Seoul to surprise your sister and had no idea that Dani was in the same group. The rest of the day was filled with laughter and stories. You got to know the rest of the group, and they were all happy to see Hanni so surprised. Danielle and your relationship was a bit of a shock, but they could see how happy they made each other, and that was all that mattered. As the day came to an end, Hanni hugged her sister and Danielle tightly, grateful to have them both in her life. She couldn't wait to see you again.

...

An: This was just a thought I had and I didn't wanna add dialogue so bye!!!

[luv-leigh-writes]

i’ve had this account for a while now but for some reason just customized it and made it cute. the plan is to write for kpop groups or make mood boards (for both groups and individual members) but i literally don’t know where to start lmao so please send in some recommendations

this is also just bc i feel like i don’t have any hobbies (just ignore that i read nonstop, play cello, play stardew valley religiously, and bake).

[minhosbitterfanfics]

📹: newjeans

[amuyyi]

unfiltered y/n .

synopsis; two drabbles of y/n being the oldest of newjeans, yet arguably the most chaotic and childish. 21 year old y/n who's very gen z coded and borderline chronically online from a young age.

trope; platonic! newjeans x f!reader, just danielle + hyein bc im lazy

wc; 1.9k

cw; n/a

a/n; guys i think i fr forgot how to write erm so sorry this is dookie but i needed to write something lighthearted to keep my sanity even tho writers block is real rn thumbs up emoji ... also y/n is just me again LMFAO

Humming, your eyes glaze over the Phoning chat. You and Danielle sat comfortably within your practice room, the younger girl joining shortly after seeing you had started a livestream. There was no particular reason for this stream, you simply felt like entertaining your fans for the day. Throughout the livestream, you and Danielle simply talked, being some of the most social and extroverted members of Newjeans, it wasn’t hard for you two to popcorn different topics from one another.

“Did you ever read Warriors?”

“What, that book series about the emo cats?”

“They’re not emo– well…. Actually…”

Both you and Danielle burst into a fit of giggles as you tried to explain the lore of the Warrior Cats series, which then went into you making a powerpoint on why your company should allow you to have a cat in the dorms, which then went into a conversation about how you guys wanted to decorate your ideal home…

When you and Danielle were put into a room together, it almost seemed like you two fueled each other's energy in a never ending cycle. Still, as your laughter dies down, the pair of you decide to just chill, even for a moment. Your attention gets drawn back to the comments whilst Danielle aimlessly scrolled on her phone for a bit.

“y/n, who are your favorite kpop artists??” You read out loud.

Your eyes light up at this question. Before becoming a trainee, you were a die hard fan of many groups back when you were younger. Honestly.. You were a bit of a chronically online kid, despite your social tendencies. Back in the day, you ran a kpop stan twitter, and are well versed in the new vocabulary of online meme culture… as embarrassing as it was to admit the more you thought about it. 

After reading the comment, the mischievous and playful glint in your eye was impossible to ignore, and Dani seemed to pick up on the shift in energy. Shooting you a suspicious glance, you decide to speak up.

“Ah there are so many groups I love… But.. I’d have to say Red Velvet and LOONA...!”

It was an innocent enough answer at a glance, but to some, the underlying message behind it was glaringly obvious.

Almost immediately after speaking, in the most obvious and not discreet fashion, you freeze, arching a brow making a curious looking expression at the camera as you pucker your lips. It was undeniable that you were referencing an all too familiar meme within the LGBTQ community.

Honestly, you were never one to shy away from your sexuality. You were lucky enough to know who you were from a young age. (All of your odd childhood crushes practically spoke for themselves. Rain from the movie Spirit, for example. The horse.) 

It wasn’t long before the girls caught onto you, and they have been nothing but supportive since. Oftentimes they would tease you over your clinginess with your other members, or how you’d very publicly fawn over other female idols, while nearly all of the light drained from your eyes when approached by a man. 

In hindsight, it was a surprise that they didn’t catch on sooner. The way you acted so stiff around male idols when forced to do Tiktoks with them, or how you never entertained their advances. However, it seemed like Some fans did seem to notice faster than your own members, and deemed you “Irene's daughter” as a result— a title in which you wear with pride, might you add! 

That wasn't to say you didn't have your own hardships and struggles with your sexuality at the same time, though. Of course, being a part of one of the biggest kpop groups of your generation, you couldn’t express your sexuality publically. Not yet. It was too risky. A large chunk of your fan base consisted of straight men anyways… Potential backlash would be detrimental. You didn’t want to drag the others down with you. Not when you guys have so much ahead together.

So you keep your head low, put on your best smile, and focus on your members.

….Until moments like these, of course.

Eyes practically boggling out of her head, Danielle bursts into laughter, shoving your shoulder with one hand while she covers her face with her sweater sleeve.

“Unnie…!” she scream-whispers, baffled by your words. Of course she knew what you were hinting at, she didn’t live under a rock her whole life.

Seeing Danielles reaction only seems to egg you on though. What? You weren’t saying anything explicitly queer. Only the people that mattered would know. Worst case scenario, you’d be in some odd rumor or speculation that had no real evidence to back you up. Maybe you’d be seen as an ally. Humming once again, you pretend to think.

“Though if you want to know about male artists….” You take a significantly longer time to answer this as Danielle is left a giggling mess next to you. She seemed almost a little distressed through the laughter, but she trusted you.

“I would probably say I like EXO and Shinee the most.”

Once again, you make that damn face, and Danielle throws her head back in hysterical laughter. She grabs your shoulder and shakes you around, whispering quiet scoldings into your ear as you snicker, feigning an innocent look as the chat practically blows up.

[cha3wonz] – HELLO???? [kaheii] – y/n blow a kiss if u like women [luv__newjeans] – okay ally

Unsurprisingly, clips of your shared live with Danielle went viral. Many stan accounts on twitter began to speculate that you were queer, whilst others fully embraced it. Your favorite posts were the edits of you with the rainbow flag followed up by a question mark. It was all too good.

Honestly, you didn’t even think it was a big deal. You didn’t pay much attention to other male groups– you never did, really, but when you looked at the new incoming generation of boy group members… They practically had the whole pride parade following them. 

There were a few minor articles about you here and there, but you were mostly off the hook.

Danielle lay sprawled across your back whilst you lay on her bed, scrolling through Twitter aimlessly as she laughs at the comments on your recent instagram post.

“It seems that your fangirls can't get enough of you, lovergirl,” she teases lightheartedly as you wiggle beneath her weight, giggling.

Maybe one day you’ll share the news to your fans, and maybe one day they won’t even be surprised. But you’re glad to have what you have now. Just you, your girls, and your ever growing folder of queer y/n memes off of Twitter.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

Hyein was in the middle of a solo livestream within her bedroom, lying comfortably in her bed as she showcased various articles of clothing she had bought with Hanni the day prior.

The livestream was going well, peaceful as Hyein makes her way through several t shirts, sweaters, pants, and skirts of all colors and styles.

Right when Hyein was about to reveal her favorite article of clothing from the haul, loud, almost desperate banging rings throughout the room. An almost pathetic sounding yelp of surprise erupts from the girl before she curiously glances at the livestream. 

Leaning forward, she whispers to the camera, “I think… I think there's a creep trying to break in…” 

Suddenly, the door bursts open, with a very flustered and irritated y/n tumbling in shortly after. iPad in hand, you collapse into the bed next to Hyein

“Guys, guy, GUYS. The theme was scene!!! What the hell is this?! Look at THIS versus MY outfit!” You exclaim almost a little too loudly as you shove the ipad in front of the camera. Failing to focus on your screen properly, the viewers simply saw a bright white square as you groaned.

Baffled and still a bit in shock, Hyein speaks up, “Unnie, it's really not that serio–”

“This is bullsh–” You cut yourself off as Hyein snorts loudly at your near slip up. Clearing your throat, you grip your ipad a little tighter than needed, trying to calm down.

“This is unfair. And you know what's worse? Its probably some nine year old with their friends voting for them behind the screen!” You whine out dramatically. With how upset you were getting, it wouldn't be surprising if this genuinely was the one determining factor that would either make or break your night.

Hyein couldn't bite back the amused laugh at your seriousness. 

You took your games pretty seriously. Even if it was roblox. There was something familiar and comforting about it all, really. Lighthearted games like this  played a major part in your childhood— which was, of course, abruptly cut short once you became a trainee at age 14. Now that you were an adult with a job as an idol, you could buy your own robux, buy your own gamepasses and items… and most importantly, stomp on little kids in-game. You were here first, after all.

“Unnie, aren't you like, 21 years old? Don't you think you’re a little too old to—“

“And don't you like— what, 12?!” You shoot back without even missing a beat.

A brief, yet suffocating silence passes as the both of you stare at each other, wide eyed. Never in your years of knowing the younger girl have you ever been so.. sassy to her. You were the oldest, after all. It was your job to take care of her.

Almost instantly, you drop your ipad and tackle the younger girl in a hug, crying out, “BABY HYEIN!!! IM SORRY…!!!”

Hyein on the other hand, was not as reciprocal to your attempts at apologizing. Upon being tackled, half of the air in her lungs practically got knocked out of her, and she finds herself tumbling backwards into the blankets below. Instead of accepting your obviously very real and very distressed apology, she began struggling to wriggle out of your grasp as she yelled out, “NO! LET ME GO UNNIE!! LET ME GOOO!!!”

Though the youngest towered over you by over half a foot, your grip on her was borderline deadly. Squeezing your arms tightly around her neck in an attempt at being soothing and sweet (you werent) you scream at yourself, rocking her back and forth. 

“I'm so STUPID im SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY I JUST WANTED YOU TO PLAY WITH ME.”

Incoherent screams and movement was seen from the livestream for about 5 minutes before Hyein tapped your arm, giving in.

“Fine, fine..! I forgive you unnie, just let me go…!”

The moments following Hyein’s acceptance of her fate seemed to actually go by pretty smoothly compared to the chaos that had just ensued a few minutes prior.

Laying in bed together, the two of you played dress to impress while on the live, occasionally interacting with the viewers, but mostly focusing on winning the game. A comfortable silence passes, the only sound being nails against iPad screens.

The pair of you would proudly showcase your creations to the camera, and shared mutual frustration when neither of you would even place despite the immense efforts you put into your outfits.

“I swear to god Hyein, I’m gonna buy both of us VIP and we’re gonna leave these girls in the dust…”

As you prepare to go up for your final round of the night, Hyein suddenly perks up.

“Oh look, unnie! This outfit is actually pretty good…”

“Huh? Oh!! You're right! This is super pretty…”

“…”

“…”

“Two stars?”

“Two stars.”

[jayniks]

Enhypen masterlist

. reactions .

╭─╮┍┈ ┉┈ ┉┈ ┉┈ ┉┈

│░┊╟ you having your period.

│░┊╟ they don't pay enough attention to you.

│░┊╟ you wearing other member's clothes. (yan)

│░┊╟ another member cuddling you in your sleep. (yan)

│░┊╟ seeing you for the first time. (yan)

│░┊╟ you accidentally backhuggigng them instead of someone. (yan)

│░┊╟ their s/o refusing to kiss them because is their first kiss. (yan)

│░┊╟ you confess to them. (yan)

│░┊╟ you asking if you can kiss them. (yan)

│░┊╟ dance collab with their crush idol!you.

│░┊╟ their s/o is getting harassed by their bodyguard. (yan)

╰─╯┕┈ ┉┈ ┉┈ ┉┈ ┉┈

. solo .

「🎧」﹐﹟heeseung﹗﹢

Nothing yet.

〉⋆ᴗ-﹙✶﹚ᶻzᶻ﹒jay

〘💌💭〙mafia one shot

♡ ︴mafia, yandere

▸🥤 ⫶ just jay falling in love with you

﹒﹒🫧﹕﹙jake﹚✦◝

〘💌💭〙you're mine

♡ ︴yandere, m*rder

▸🥤 ⫶ jake does everything just so he can have his happy ending with you

◜﹒﹟sung﹒hoon﹑﹑🪼﹗

Nothing yet.

♡→﹕su﹠noo.﹙⋆ᴗ-﹚？

〘💌💭〙stalker

♡ ︴yandere, m*rder

▸🥤 ⫶ sunoo swears he's in a relationship with you

〘💌💭〙step on me

♡ ︴angst

▸🥤 ⫶ you love your boyfriend, but does he loves you back?

◟ ˃˂﹐﹫﹒jungwon ﹒﹒🐋

〘💌💭〙running away

♡ ︴yandere

▸🥤 ⫶ you run as fast as you can from your horrorific future

✧．〔⛲〕❛﹑niki﹐！

〘💌💭〙riki thoughts

♡ ︴yandere, m*rder

▸🥤 ⫶  niki is being jealous about your dog

〘💌💭〙niki x idol reader

♡ ︴fluff, silly

▸🥤 ⫶ a random drabble ft. Eunchae from lesserafim

〘💌💭〙promise pt.1 / pt.2

♡ ︴angst

▸🥤 ⫶ your boyfriend promised you happiness, but in the end he decided to sacrifice you for his happiness. Ft. Newjeans, jia from tri.be, enhypen members.

[bluesidez]

Gym Rat! Miguel Masterlist 🎧💪🏾🩵

Part 1: The intro!

Part 2: Instagram flirting

Part 3: Gym date?

Part 4: Forgive and Forget

Part 5: Freshman Year, 1st Semester

Part 6: Freshman Year, 2nd Semester

Part 7: The Aftermath [18+]

Part 8: Black Card [18+]

Part 9.1: Summer Lovin’ [18+] ⤵️

Part 9.2: Yachty Pawty [18+] ⤴️

Bonus: SFW + NSFW Alphabet [18+]

Part 10: The Catch Up

Part 11: Sophomore Year, August-September: The One to Remember [18+]

Part 12: Sophomore Year, Conflicted

Part 13: Sophomore Year, Friday the 13th [18+]

Part 14: Sophmore Year, Crashing Out

Part 15: Sophmore Year, Falling for Fall

Part 16: Sophmore Year, Past Promises [18+]

Part 17: ????

memes: all my homies… | bachata seven drabbles: Dad GR!Miguel | lash appointment | Boyfriend Magic ✨ | weighted blanket fics by others: Birthday Date art: coming soon!!

[seonghwaddict]

scoot over, choi — choi jongho

in which luck is no longer on your side and you find yourself sharing a bed with your annoying coworker.

agent!choi jongho x agent!fem!reader. genre. one bed trope, slight fluff, slight enemies to lovers but they're not quite at the lovers part yet. warnings. swearing, slight banter, he calls reader princess once, denial of feelings. wc. 0.6k.

lilo's notes. a little jongho drabble :>

listening to. get up, newjeans.

masterlist

"are you fucking kidding me?" you scoffed when you finally came back from the bathroom. "we specifically asked for two beds."

of course, had you noticed this fatal problem earlier, then you would've already been down asking for a room with two separate beds. but you made a beeline for the bathroom as soon as you entered the small hotel room, desperate to get into something more comfortable than the skimpy dress you had to wear for a mission.

though the pair of you were supposed to be partners for this mission, you were never really fond of each other. you’d been partners many times before and had clearly expressed your dislike for each other. the first time you worked together was to recover a stolen file. even though it was a successful mission, you were both nearly shot because you yelled at him for breathing too loudly. but hongjoong insisted on pairing you up because, despite your constant bickering, you made a good team.

jongho rolled his eyes discreetly and secured the entrance exit door as he turned around and sighed, walking over to the bed, taking off his jacket while doing so, and fluffing up some pillows. "yes, princess, i can see that."

you watched him briefly, your eyes narrowed at the nickname. how dare he call you that? and how dare your face heat up at it? you dropped your bag on the carpeted floor and leaned against the desk that stood against the wall. you shook your head and scowled, crossing your arms. "well, i'm not sharing a bed with you."

"why? you just wouldn't be able to resist me, would you?" his voice was silky smooth. if there was something he loved more than anything, it would be taunting you. riling you up just because he enjoyed the annoyed scowl on your face.

you huffed and jutted your chin up defiantly. "i'm a lady, that would be improper."

he laughed, resting his hand against the headboard after taking off his shoes and getting on the bed to sit against it. "you’re most definitely anything but proper, but sure. if you really don't wanna sleep on the bed, make yourself comfortable on the floor because i surely won’t."

"like hell, i am," out of pure spite, you walked over to the other side of the bed, kicking your shoes off harshly. "scoot over, choi."

jongho chuckled quietly, doing as told. you lifted the bedsheets and laid underneath it (you also made sure that you were as far away from him as you possibly could be) before pulling it up to your chin in hopes to provide some warmth. for a second, you considered grabbing some of the towels from the bedroom and creating a physical wall between where he was laying and you.

"this changes nothing, i still hate you."

"you don't hate me, you just hate how i make you feel."

"shut up and let me sleep."

he blinked at the fact that you didn’t deny his statement, unsure of how to feel about it. but soon enough, the brushed his thoughts away and the of you drifted off into sleep, needing plenty of rest for tomorrow.

however, when jongho awoke in the middle of the night for water, he found that you had drifted together in their sleep and you were now halfway on top of him, your leg thrown over his midsection and your arms holding him loosely. a moment of panic radiated through him for a split second before he realised how strangely natural your body fit against his. how peaceful your face looked as it was pressed against the side of his chest.

and yet he decided to carefully remove himself from under you and not speak of it ever again.

networks. @cromernet @blankjournal

taglist. @ad0rechuu @sankatchu

[loviestoki]

echoes of us — kang haerin x f!reader

warnings: angst, breakup

word count: n/a but it's a short read !!

"Here," Haerin said, her voice barely above a whisper. She gently pushed a brown cardboard box into your arms, its contents heavy with the weight of your shared memories. For a moment, Mother Nature held her breath as the world around you slowed. Internally, time accelerated, your heart a ravenous beast, pounding mercilessly inside you, devouring every ounce of your love and hope. You stared into her dark eyes, now repulsive, like two black holes of despair swallowing the warmth you once held. Your breath caught in your throat, leaving a bitter taste of regret. One year. A year of your life that you had spent endlessly loving and devoting yourself to Haerin, all in vain.

...

"Why?" was all you could manage to say as tears streamed down your face, carving deep paths of betrayal into your cheeks.

"...I'm afraid," her voice trembled, her eyes filled with sorrow, now avoiding yours as she looked down, "of how people would react if they saw us together." You scoff, wiping the tears from your face with a shaking hand as you gather the rage from within you and morphed it into the courage you needed to speak up for yourself.

"I thought you loved me-"

"I do!" She cuts you off, her nonchalant facade now gone as her own face has become a barren wasteland, her tears like rain in a drought.

"No. You were always more afraid of what others would think than of losing me; that's not love, Haerin." She shakes her head at you, a silent plea for understanding.

"Forget it, I love you." You whisper for what would be the last time. Your heart subconsciously replays your happiest memories of her, trying to convince you to stay. But the pain was too much. You turned away from her, the desolate street stretching out before you. The wind whipped at your face, a taunting echo of the serenity that had been ripped away from you in the matter of minutes.

[haerni]

HOW SWEET, “i’m without you”

synopsis: y’know it’s just an old trick && the demon who keeps knocking at your heart knows the formula,, but you won’t fall for it anymore, right ?

ft. lee heeseung, park jongseong, sim jaeyun + park sunghoon. (based on ‘how sweet’ by NewJeans!)

content: fem reader! just hyung line trying to rizz (woo) you up, kind of exes to lovers, they fumbled lol except for jay, lowkey implied toxic relationship, miscommunication trope, subpar dialogues struggling fr, jake & reader has issues fr (10:36 inspo). 2.8k words

— as always minimal proofread and very self indulgent >< & also because i wrote it on a whim.

( 🗯️ ) notes: a very word vomit drabble, haven't written in a long time, my exams are approaching soon this is sort of a lil warm gift from me ! ^_^ can u tell i love jay.. he's literally every eldest daughter's dream :(

JUST STEP OUT YOU LITTLE DEMON IN MY STORYLINE don’t knock on my door, i’ll see you out

this has been too much of an occurrence, a habit that heeseung has grown accustomed to. he knows he shouldn’t, its not acceptable, he knows he’s subjecting himself to a torture that was designed to be his dreams of you.

he should stop, he should leave, yet he finds himself once more at the same blocks of pavements with the exact same four steps up to the porch decorated with flowers that bloom so prettily in the night. and his knuckles hits the same wooden door, eyes dazed, out of his mind, but he knocks.

he knows he doesn’t have any right to be here. to stand in front of your door letting his frame lean on it as he waits for the same footsteps he has memorized.

heeseung prided over being a gentleman, he’s respectful, he knows his boundaries—his place, but right now he’s anything that.

maybe lee heeseung has never been one after you.

he hears the scuffle behind the door, and maybe it was weird that he knows exactly those footfalls, how just sound manages to touch a vile in him, a rush of excitement thrums as he waits the door to creak open. because the other side to where he stands, there you were.

it opens.

there you are—his favorite girl. a frown adorning your face and your eyes reflecting the warm light above your door, “you can't keep doing this, heeseung.”

and a stupid smile makes its way to his face when you call his name. he’s almost thankful he stopped taking the drinks jake kept giving him, it could never even compare the sound he hears now (which he would rather much indulge in).

“hi, baby,” he breathed.

he may or may not remember this night, but he’ll regret it again in the morning.

you scoff at him, “you can’t call me that now, heeseung.” his name felt like acid to his face when you say it that way, but nevertheless lee heeseung lets you burn him—because he deserves it, a faint voice whispers in his head.

“sorry, bad habits.”

what a little liar, he was. because after all, he knows that you know it was, there was never a point for him to utter it in your face.

he doesn’t know what was worse, the venom that kills you or the silence that drowns you? heeseung prefers if you would curse him just a little, maybe he would feel more good with that, maybe it would lessen the guilt that lies heavy in his chest.

but heeseung is addicted, he is addicted to this tryst (you’re not together anymore, he reminds himself) and he still asks you the same question.

“let me in?”

he was bad for you, you knew that. he wonders why you still open your door for him every night his feet takes him to you? you were just as addicted as him, he surmised.

it’s selfish, but he wishes you’d stay the same.

DONE SCROLLING THOUSAND TIMES I KNOW IT’S AN OLD TRICK it’s a very simple formula

for someone who you call as your ex, park jongseong became much more than that to you.

your fallout was something you couldn't call fine, because it isn't. you were a mess—jay wanted to hold you and you can't have yourself fall over the edge just yet.

you weren't ready and he was.

you and jay are the polar opposite of each other. he was put together, he knows what he wants, he has everything, he is secure with himself. and you are simply not everything he was—it was daunting, it scared you and it was stupid. jay loved you all the same, he was perfect and that became bigger than all the good things you call in your relationship with him.

you knew that dating jay would come with perils and problems, you knew them you would both overcome it. but is love really enough to be an answer, when you were the problem itself?

it is incomprehensible to you, how can someone be capable to love this much?

you never asked him, he couldn't give you an answer that you deserve because of it.

it’s unhealthy—you are calling him again. you really shouldn't, you knew your friends would be disappointed. it's ironic how fast you fall in the abyss of darkness, but you couldn't trust yourself to do the same when he asked you to let him catch you. (familiarity was a variable that played a favor over your heart and jay knew that)

the dial tone rings—once, twice, you hear his voice.

“yn, you okay?” it was immediate and it's soft. it's too much. you're convinced you were cursed. you yearn for it, for him.

he waits for you, as he always does. patiently, as you knew him and he hears the breaths you take, the sniffles, he worries more. he tries to call you out once more.

“lov—” he catches himself from saying it, “hey, talk to me, angel.”

“i’m sorry. i don’t know what is wrong with me, ‘seong,” you try to catch your breath, apologizing as soon as you said it.

god, it breaks something in him, “it’s okay, yn. i got you, yeah?” he’s already at the door taking his keys, he doesn’t have any right, but you need him, right? please say it to him, please need him just one more time and let him hold you this time. as soon as he utters his prayers, you whisper.

“can you come to me..” it was so quiet he almost didn’t catch it, “please?” but he’s glad he did.

when he had declared that he would love one person in his life, he vowed and kept it. park jongseong was in it for you, he knew why you broke things off with him, he understood—like all the times he does. you probably didn't know, but he couldn't get himself to remove the picture of you in his bedside. when you called him a week after, he knew he should hang up the call and let you figure things out by yourself, but he didn't. your number stayed as it was before. he should grant you space and time, but he couldn't. because jay loved you so damn much, it's either you or no one else.

be damned all those fears that lingers with you, because park jongseong wants you and only you.

I WON’T ASK ANYMORE (HOW SWEET IT TASTES) you don’t have to tell me now that i’m without you

one thing that jake fails to understand was how much you think he doesn’t need you as much as you need him. he shoots all your words down before they can leave him out alone.

the nights have always been a nightmare for you, not because of the dark veils in the sky, or the monsters that chase you, but because you can’t sleep. you cannot descend to slumber as you would have when you were a child—it was easier then. now warmth was more of a problem for you, it’s a small problem it shouldn’t really be much to be fuzz over it. a stuff toy would’ve solved the problem just fine, it provided you the same security that lulls you into the night.

except that you have found sanctuary in sim jaeyun—a safe haven that envelopes you deeper into sleep, his warm body offers more than security. serenity and heaven sounds just as the same when he holds you in the night.

but everything should always come to an end, doesn’t it?

you don’t know when the peace he had offered cracks through you and it felt like a burden of guilt you couldn’t understand.

“we can’t keep doing this, ‘yunie.”

he doesn’t get you, confused and bewildered at your sudden statement to him when he sat down on your couch. he thinks you’re playing with him, maybe a prank, one of your silly little ideas. because he is sure as hell you didn’t just call your relationship as something like ‘this’, like it wasn’t worth of anything.

“what do you mean, yn?”

the air feels a little heavier, jake knew then that he wouldn’t like what was ever you were going to say. and he does whatever could save him of his position to you, whatever could shut down every rejection you think of. but before he could even dismiss it, this time you beat him to it.

“let’s stop this, jake. stop pretending like you need me.” you say more firmly.

he frowns at that, he doesn’t need you? are you being serious? “i don’t know what you’re talking about, pretty. because i’m pretty damn sure i’m not pretending here.”

you scoff at that. he doesn’t really get it does he? “aren’t you tired? we aren’t anything jaeyun, you’re just someone who helps me sleep at night and i don’t want to take up your time, i don’t want to use you. we’re nothing more, nothing less than this.”

this—jake hates that word now.

why do you keep using it, why are you reducing your relationship as to something less than what it should? why are you pushing him away now? why were you pretending like it’s nothing? why are you not understanding that you’re not the only one who needs something?

“what’s so wrong with this? with us?”

“everything!”

what’s wrong with that? what’s wrong with holding you in the night to sleep? so what if you don’t know what to label it between the boundaries of romantic and platonic? what was wrong with having you? what was wrong leaning to him? to ask him for help?

his eyes tell you everything you need to know that goes in his head, because you’ve known enough to read him. you were friends since you were fifteen and now you don’t know anymore, but you know him. you can’t lean into him anymore—not when, what you feel now steps over the line of what a friend should be.

(it feels weird now, to have the need to hold someone at night, yet you want it. but you can’t tie down jake, you can’t do that to him.)

jake doesn’t understand what the problem was. he knew the risk of what the two of you had agreed, he was willing to bet on every star that he wouldn’t mind for you to have him.

he doesn’t understand but he knows he loves you, “hold me, then. don’t let me go.” he pleads with you.

you can’t.

I’M FEELING MY OWN WAY I’M IN IT ‘CAUSE ME AND YOU ARE DIFFERENT so i won’t stay, i’m leaving

you and sunghoon has always been an intricate of woven patterns, with spools of threads of your color stitch into each of you. both of you are too much of each other. you used to think nothing could ever sever the tapestry the both of you weaved. that was before he was miles away from home and time was not a challenge to the both of you.

all the memories you remember were now bound with his last words before he left, “take care.”

he was called to train internationally, it was big. he was making a name for himself out there and now his name is called over to be known by the world. you’re always happy for him, you’re proud. sunghoon was made to be in the spotlight, he was made to be loved, he was born to be on a stage where he shines. and you think sunghoon looks pretty, he looks pretty when he’s on the rink, skating. he looks so happy there, a place so far yet so near where you can’t step in and reach.

he looks so happy without you and that was okay, you think to yourself. it’s okay, a repeated mantra sounding in your mind as you watch him through a screen.

waiting wasn’t new to you and wanting him more wasn’t either. you don’t really know what is much worse.

there is a space between that bleeds, an indentation of sunghoon in your heart. cold was a familiar company in your darkened nights, his name was like a ghost of an echo in your home.

it’s okay, you remind yourself again. you’re fine with this.

because he looks so happy when he’s not with you, park sunghoon belongs to the world and it makes you sick—even though you know it’s selfish and it’s disgusting to feel something like this—you realize then, you don’t want to be part of that world, just among the sea of faces he’ll forget.

the picture in the frames looks at you with mockery, his side in everything feels hollow and nothing. he is like the ocean that slips past beyond your fingers, but completely engulfs you wholly, having your lungs deluge in it. it pierces through like an arrow, the same ones where you used to believe it was out of love, before everything comes down.

you love park sunghoon, you really do. in the depths of your heart his name was carved gently and carefully.

a name that would solely have your heart beating in a mile, you've never thought it would just end up bleeding, cut open freshly with his own hands, a heart you have given so willingly and with so much trust that you can ever offer in a silver lining platter. to love boundlessly and endlessly until you’re a void of nothing, but a shell of yourself shriveled. but you can’t stop pouring the wine until it overflows—until it’s empty.

you’re not sure where it started, when all the warmth turned cold, where he decided to give up, you're not sure if you can keep fighting.

you never saw it coming, you’re sure the love the both of you had can overcome anything, it can have your relationship stay afloat through all the storms and tides of problems and indecisions, maybe you’re wrong, maybe it was him, maybe it was bound to happen. you’re too hurt to think about it. but a mirage plays in your mind dauntingly, that you can still have those memories you had together, the thread stands on its own, stretching to its limits, the lines dwindle and your hope dies down together with it.

when did his hands drop yours?

the indentation he leaves is noticeable, you can hardly miss it, after all you felt like you were the letter that got crumpled.

his name echoes around the walls of your home (can you still call it a home if it’s devoid of anything?) a mockery to you, his things were, his conspicuous absence, the darkened place of loneliness, the moonlight bleeds into the window, giving your room an illuminated light, it’s suffocating, and somehow the room seems smaller, closer, a cage or walls of once you knew were the sanctuary of comfort, now stands tall as nothing, but a reminder of the fall apart.

the heart of once you have loved was gone and you’re not sure if you’ll be fine by then. were you even sure of anything at all? living with a ghost of a name in your heart, moving on wasn’t always easy to do, but you hope nonetheless, you hope his name would be nothing, but healed scars from all of the distance.

he comes home on a random wednesday with nothing, but his training suit and eyes that you always adore tired and on the verge of falling. a crazed look of apprehension, sunghoon knew you were slipping through his fingers when you wouldn’t answer his calls anymore and the best thing he could think of was to hold you, physically—so you wouldn’t disappear on him.

when he stands in front of you the words don’t appear in front of him, it’s frustrating.

“why can’t you just leave me?”

and god does he wish you wouldn’t say that to him again.

“i can’t,” he whispers, “i tried and i simply can’t.”

when park sunghoon met you, he started dreaming—he was nine summers then. still has the childlike wonder who held admiration and you were eight who live on the other side of the road from his house, he thinks you were pretty.

like a beautiful sunset he always watches with his sister on the seaside, you always seem to be there for him anyway, catching a glimpse of your face on the side of his eyes. his coach always scolds him for being distracted in the rink, he only responds with,

“sorry, coach. i’ll do better.” he wanted to impress you back then. (he still does.)

the sun shines so brightly it doesn’t miss how it always seems to reflect your smile. laughing at something your friend has told you, he wonders what it was.

back then the two of you didn’t really talk much at first, always the brief gaze at each and little waves. but nothing more, he wishes to talk to you on other days, when the time is slow and the breeze washes all the heat from his face, but he doesn’t, always hesitating, almost made encounters, but by the end of it he’ll just back out the last minute.

it’s almost a surprise how he even managed to call you his, park sunghoon has loved you since the ninth of summer.

you still love him despite everything.

he thinks you are still pretty until now, wearing his old jersey with his name on it on the sidelines, cheering him on top of your voice, he decided right then that he would like to have you always there for him.

—fin.

｡｡｡ ♥︎ likes, comments & reblogs are highly appreciated! hope y'all like this, i went a lil crazy on hoon ㅠㅠ.