#never finished it either tho i think i got up to book 3 or 4 😭

[francy-sketches]

just randomly remebered a book series i read as a kid ok no actually i just read books 3 4 and 5 for some reason and there's like 6 but I was really into it for a while. anyway it was one of those geronimo stilton books but the stupid rat was not in them idk why they had his name on the cover they were actually kind of gruesome from what i remember. ngl they went hard they had cool little sketches in them too and there was this blue dragon with half a tail i loved him sm i was so upset when i couldnt find fanart bc nobody knew this book u.u I'm like 99% sure it was never translated so its just an italian thing but. any of my fellow italian girlies remember this. was I the only one to ever read it

[nicegaai]

Ch 7:

(i ragequit halfway thru rereading this chapter bc i decided i hated it and everything in the world and etc <3 its literally fine tho. im going to finish this reread bc i said i would and i WILL. and i keep daydreaming ab this universe lately. i miss them.)

Ohhh this is where I took a big break between chapters and I was never sure the flow between them made a ton of sense… idk I guess because the two of them had a good talk and then immediately Emil dreamed about sucking oniichan off…..

Ohh this is so silly… Emil my boy.. this is so awkward for sig what are u doooooing <3

HMM. There are edits I want to make here. I didn’t need the last sentence. I used to like it, now I don’t . :/

OH!!!!! I did write Leon into this!!! Id forgot! I had several scenes with him i cut out bc I just didn’t want to write them..

ohh my god I duplicated a whole paragraph. This has all just been an elaborate exercise in embarrassment. I can’t believe I got away with this.

Wow </3 if u think about it, Sig wanting to fuck Emil sooo bad actually saved him from the gay incel lifestyle. It could have been so much worse for my boy <//3

Oh. The transition made me gasp. Gagged me a bit. Get it boysss. Wild Fucking Scene between these three. Idk what to say to this. Op you have problems.

Another error to edit :-/

CRAP DUDE I LEFT IN NOTES THAT WERE FOR ME!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOW DID I NOT SEE THAT. I can’t take it anymore im so madddddddd 

Actually this whole chapter is my least fav yet. SIGHH. I wanna go in and edit dialogue again bc this just. ughh. Ive changed I could do him better this time

(I actually walked away here for like 4 hours. Maybe im just at the anger stage of grief. )

Ok forget Sig, Berwald would not say that either. What is any of this? Why is any of this. Mannnnnnn get me out of here!!!!!  Haha wait I can just skim read. Its fine.

(It was not fine. I rage quit again and started again the next day.)

IM SORRY FOR THE NEGATIVITY ALL OF A SUDDEN I don’t know what my problem is. It’s Sunday now, back at it. Im gonna finish this reread TODAY so I can START WRITING !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hm yeah this scene really didn’t play out as well as I hoped it would. I wanna throw up and cry but its good im good its good I am good … Its not good and I don’t know why it not being good is fucking w me this bad lmao

(RIGHT HERE is where i quit for like a month and im back again let's see if i freak out a third time<3)

so i guess this is why books go thru multiple rounds of edits. i understand now. writing is a mess and i came at this thing overconfident i could hammer something out on the fly,,,,,,,,

i will allow myself to go in and do rewrites and scene rearranging and such AFTER i finish the last chapter ONLY. thats my new motivation to finish this. and i will finish it. i will. i say this bc i really do fucking hate this scene and i want to do something violent to it in the rewrite phase sooo bad ill tear it to bits ill kill it dead #positivethinking

actually fuck this its my reread. i dont HAVE TO read this scene. aaaaand skip (<- liar who continues to skim and cringe)

ok scene over i lived. back to my darlingbabyboybabybooboobear

it was a mistake to involve characters that i dont want to throttle and soak in milk and slam against the wall. the writing only gets good when iceland is there i think & the rest is filler. the quality fr jumped about 3 levels this is so funnyyyyyy. im not hopeless after all ...!!

im going to squeeze emil until his head pops like a zit

im going to scream i m going to!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD ARE THEY FUCKIN IN THIS CHAPTER? OH MY GOD ARE THEY? WAIT THERES STILL LIKE 1/3RD LEFT TO GO I DONT REMEMBER THIS ARE THEY GONNA --

im only getting more intrigued. what is this. whats happening. are they fuckin or nah

i love typos theyre eachand every one my special little friend *shaking w barely contained rage(

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i do not remember where this is going but i hope they fuckin oh my god oh my god im kickin my feet and gigglinggggg aiigieieghhghe

hes a nervous little thingg ...... uwa.. moé ... <333

this is stupid and indulgent but i live for emil reacting to things.

make another edit here i think emil could be reacting cuter. future me, make the gayboy MORE moe please tttthnak you

i made a stupid noise when they kissed im weak i a m a weak man. also i knowwww they fuckin now but i dont trust that the sex is going to be well written i know it wont be.

already i am disappointed. and i know why cuz i can feel exactly where i struggled w the eroticism of the peenus and im reading this like. yeah i didnt enjoy writing that and its coming across to the reader alright. or to me at least with my criticism goggles on. god the next few chapters are going to be so much worse. but i think i can make it work. theres. i have. ..im seeing visions from fujoshi jesus

oh no i squee'd .. theres not another word for it. AHH!!!! i fucking squee'd!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ]IM KICKING M Y FEET AND STUFF WHAT denice got me rolling around schoolgirl style . im a full on mess i love them sm ,THIS IS SO SILLYYYYYYYY I LOVE THEMMMMMMMMMMMMM WHAT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

im actually enjoying this so much i love denice.....

BWAHHHGHHH

EAUEGHAEUEGAHGAEHGA

projection in my fanfic? nooo neverr,

HES SOOOOOOOOOOOOO CUTE EMILLLLL BABYYYYYY I WUV UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

kicking my feet again aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

fav chapter ending ive ever written in anything ever. so good. what a horrible piece of shit i hate him. i hate all of this. something something my twisted mind. one more chpater ill read idk tomorrow maybe the next day.....well goodnight

im attempting my fic reread today. im announcing this bc i will be liveblogging to keep my morale up, NOT THAT anyone cares but i personally need this, like ill only commit to do the thing if theres an imaginary audience holding me accountable. & i like to have fun :3

anyway. captains log, its a beautiful sunny july weekend. i just finished my morning coffee, and, i am dreading this so much. i dont like rereading my own writing but i shall get over it. ok here we go.

Þetta Reddast vagueblogged directors commentary edition

Ch 1:

*opens fic and starts convulsing immediately* god i wish i smoked weed rn. i cannot chill out ever for the life of me

My Mission For Today Is: to remember what plot threads I’ve left hanging so I can resolve this story properly. And also try n remember where the flow is going. I have the end plotted out, I just am a little lost … it’s been a while :-(

------------

Abrupt beginning!!!! I’m not mad because I have . I HAD. Almost no writing experience when I started this. it isn’t ideal but I refuse to be one of those fanfic writers that starts rewriting early chapters without finishing the last ones. Ive never seen one of those types actually finish a longfic. …I’d already rather yap than actually read LMAO AHH

Oh this is worse than I remember. thats cool that s great ok alright *coughs up blood*

"20 somethings" WOW I really did not know where I was going with this when I started huh

LKJSDLKSJDLGKGDJSLDGJK ??? Who authorized this. Who let me cook. What the hell

I could write this better now. I could edit this into something beautiful. <- devil on my shoulder

FORGOT I WAS MAKING RICE BRB

"generously offered nothing to the exchange." wait STOPPPP. I’m so funny

GRAMMAR ERROR DETECTED why is there two periods. I’ll be coming back to fix that …………………. :-(((

Fuck. This is a lot. Marge Simpson Hiding Her Face dot Png

Oh this is stupid this is gayyy this is fukcinnn . Who fucking did t his. What was wrong with me,. This is so good actually. what was i ONNNN. 

Im gonna throw up and I don’t know if thats like/. A complimentary thing or if im just cringing that hard . Im feeling emotions. I love my OTPs..OT3~5? I love them so so much

Ok as much as im like “eww bad writing” this is .. dare I say, rly good in places. Not to suck my own dick but maybe all hope isnt lost and imposter syndrome is an illusion

Grammar mistake #2. Goddddddd. they should ban me from the archive for this

EMILLLLL EMIL EMIL EMIL HIIIIII BABYYYY EMILLL I LOVE UUUU AWWHUUGHH everyone clap for my bewoved baby bruvver right FUCKING now

Urghhh gritting my teeth… Im fully expecting the flow of events to start not making any gd sense. There’s no way this came together the way I hoped in my head and .... For real I was never able to read this all the way thru. this is my first time, lol. and it was all disjointed on the authorial end to say the least. Im scared T-T

Jlxjvklsdkjfsjlkdkjlsjklkljzsdkjlgaskljdgjklasljkgdljkasljkdgjklasjlkdgljkaskljdgjakl?????????? 

Im not liking the ratio of dialogue to whatever the other stuff is. scene-setting I guess. prose maybe. i could have dragged this out way longer... By which I mean made it a more satisfying read. But WHATEVER !!!! 

TIMO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TIMOOOOOOOOOO NUMERO UNOOOO DO MUNDOOOOOO I really need to utilize him more. As soon as I finish this fic I need to write a Timo POV spinoff where he gets cancelled on furry twitter for proshipping in real life

Hmmmm chapter ending didn’t hit as hard in practice as it did in drafts. Oh well. God damn that was a lot to happen in one chapter LMAOO???

OH SHIT MY RICE IS STILL COOKING —— 

[teklarn]

𝔂𝓸𝓾'𝓻𝓮 𝓷𝓸𝓽 𝓶𝔂 𝓫𝓸𝔂𝓯𝓻𝓲𝓮𝓷𝓭 - 𝓴. 𝓫𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾 (𝓹𝓽.4)

character(s): katsuki bakugou x gn!reader (x eijirou kirishima) 

a/n: y’all it makes me so happy how many people like my work oh my gosh i’m so motivated when enthusiasm shows tytyty <33 

𝕣𝕖𝕓𝕝𝕠𝕘𝕤 𝕒𝕣���� 𝕘𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕥𝕝𝕪 𝕒𝕡𝕡𝕣𝕖𝕔𝕚𝕒𝕥𝕖𝕕 !!

summary: bakugou x gn!reader. they have feelings for one another but have no idea how to express them, however y/n has someone pining for their attention. 

genre: angst 

warnings: mutual pining, cussing, aged-up to third years, love triangle, romantic tension, one-sided pining, jealousy, toxic kirishima (ok but like he’s hot tho), slowburn romance, not proofread 

word count: 2423

- - -

part 3 , part 5

you twiddled your thumbs in front of the poster. a halloween party? next month? it’d come as a surprise how fast the holiday was coming up. 

your stomach filled with butterflies, however, it sunk when you remembered what had happened last night. 

the little fight you had with kirishima. how it seemed like he suddenly hated bakugou, who was one of his best friends. you didn’t want to believe that kirishima could have had feelings for you. perhaps he was just protecting you. 

you sighed. you truly didn’t want to fight with either of them. maybe kirishima was right. he did know bakugou better than you, but to your knowledge, bakugou had never had a relationship. 

maybe kirishima was trying to say that bakugou would be toxic in the sense that he would never pay attention to you. perhaps he would be too focused on becoming the number one hero. 

whatever. it didn’t matter now. 

the poster listed that it was going to be a costume party, and dressing up was mandatory. you were good friends with mei hatsume from the support group, so she would be going all-out for the season. you wondered if she’d be able to whip something up for you, too. 

you had a few minutes left before class started, surely she should be available for a little bit of chatter. besides, mei hatsume never turned down a new project. 

turning, you started your way to the support classrooms just to be stopped, come face-to-face with the one person you’d been trying to avoid all day. “i don’t want to talk right now, kirishima,” you snapped. perhaps you were being a bit harsh, but he was the one trying to control you, was he not? 

“then don’t talk, y/n. i’ll talk.” 

you shoved past him, clutching your books to your chest. “no.” 

“just hear me out, okay? last night was...i didn’t mean to seem-” 

“seem what? possessive? rude? like an overprotective, jealous boyfriend?” 

“in no way was i trying to come across as any of those, trust me y/n.” 

you continued on your way to the support classes only to find him standing before you again. You sighed, tightening your grip around your books. “what.” you commanded him, you didn’t ask. 

kirishima let out a sigh of his own, letting his arms fall to his sides. “can we just...talk? we’re friends, and we’ve always communicated well with each other.” 

“communication was out of the question yesterday, wasn’t it?” you attempted shoving him away to continue on your way, but he caught your shoulder, finger pads digging into your skin possessively. 

“please, y/n.” 

you looked down your nose at him. “fine. say what you so badly want to get out.” 

“listen, i-” 

the bell rang, and students went rushing back into their classrooms. you shrugged, victorious. “looks like the bell isn’t on your side either, kirishima.” 

you heard him sigh in defeat, but did not look back.

---

there was something about the way kirishima was suddenly looking at you that bakugou didn’t like. at all. his pencil snapped in his grip, chips of wood and led flying into the air. 

speaking of kirishima, what was up with him lately? everything was suddenly about you. he was always around you. sure, throughout the years, you two had gotten closer, but kirishima looked just about ready to abandon bakugou’s ass on the side of the road. 

as usual, aizawa would be a bit late. in about ten minutes, the man would come wandering in, bags hanging low under his eyes, and instruct the lesson before falling back into his much-needed slumber. 

that was when bakugou would interrogate kirishima. but first, he needed to talk to you. needed to be sure he was on the winning side before anything happened between kirishima. 

bakugou walked over to your desk, tugging at your sleeve to get your attention. 

“hm?” you looked up from your notebook. “yes, bakugou? do you need something?” 

“yeah,” he replied, scratching the back of his neck. “you saw the poster too, right? the one about that stupid dance.” 

“well, i don’t think it’s stupid. it looks fun! don’t you think?” 

he drowned himself in your eyes. “mhm.” 

“so, did you still need something?” 

“got any costume ideas in mind?” 

you feigned surprise. “katsuki bakugou? are you saying what i think you’re saying?” 

he licked his lips. gosh, the way his name rolled off your tongue sounded the way honey tasted. “don’t push it.” he grinned. “still considering it.” 

“well, if you’re thinking of going, you definitely should. i’m buying tickets with mina and kaminari if you’d like to tag along.” 

“tag along?” he let out a breathy chuckle. “i’ll be the star of the show if i ‘tag along’, you got me?” 

you gave him a side smile. “mhm. but you do realize how hectic it’s gonna be there, right? i mean, you’ve got to pick something that...pops, y’know?” your fingers sprung out to add emphasis. 

“whether i wear some stupid costume or not, i’m still going to be the star of the show. you got that?”

you knew he was only teasing. if it’d been the bakugou from before, he would have most likely meant it, however, you knew how he openly teased you now. strangely, it was only you who he was so open with. 

bakugou smirked, leaning down to raise your chin with his fingers. “i’ll go if you go.”  

he had your heart pacing rapidly. “mhm.” 

“use your words.” 

“yes, i think i’ll go.” 

“you think?” he taunted. 

“i will go.” you cleared your throat. “bakugou.” 

“good.” his gentle fingers let go of your chin and he wandered back to his desk, eyeing you from there for a moment before flicking open a textbook and reading. 

you diverted your eyes back to your notebook, hands shaking as you wrote down the date. you scribbled down your name three times in the top right corner just to look busy. 

adjusting your elbow, you did your best to make it look like you were merely leaning your cheek on your hand in a bored manner. gosh. you could still feel his eyes burning into you, demanding. serious. gorgeous and blood red. 

kirishima was right about you having feelings for bakugou. however you sat there conflicted for a little while. 

bakugou had just approached you in a similar manner as kirishima. did kirishima..? 

no, you two were only friends. 

you shook your head, still doing your best to conceal the stupid grin crossing your cheeks. 

everyone knew that telling other people if you were just friends with someone after they asked, one person had feelings for the other at least. it was another thing asking yourself that. 

- - - 

it was just a week before the dance, and you still had yet to choose a costume. mina and kaminari had offered you a few of the costumes she’d worn at previous halloween parties, but none had appealed to you. 

you wanted something fresh. wanted something that you’d feel like you would have fun in. 

“wouldn’t dressing up as a pirate be really, i don’t know. i just feel like it’d be super super hot in the gym.” 

mina rolled her eyes. “well duh, you look hot in everything, y/n.” 

you scoffed. “thanks, but i’m not sure about that.” 

“kirishima seems to think so,” kaminari teased from inside the change room. all three of you were currently at a thrift store trying to find matching costumes. 

you rolled your eyes, disregarding the fact he couldn’t see. “don’t bring him up. please.” 

“what happened between you two?” mina asked, slipping the costume back onto its hanger. she slipped it back into its spot on the rack and began sifting through new clothes. “you guys just suddenly stopped talking.” 

you shrugged. “he’s just been...off lately. you know? i don’t know how else to explain it. but ever since that incident where he broke bakugou’s nose-” 

kaminari peaked out from the curtain, jaw dropping. “he broke bakugou’s nose?” 

you waved him off. “yes, now let me finish. kirishima did this thing where he just...he acted all protective in private and then tried to apologize for it the next day. he kept telling me stuff like bakugou wasn’t good for me and everything.” 

mina blinked, jaw dropping to the floor. “honey, what?” 

she and kaminari exchanged shocked glances before she popped a hip out and put her fist to it. 

“bestie, honey. you really are oblivious, aren’t you?” 

you let out an exasperated breath. “he told me that, too! he pinned me to the wall and was like, oh, you’re so oblivious.” you imitated his voice, puffing out your chest to mock his stockiness. 

“baby, baby! do you hear yourself?” mina shook you, taking you by your shoulders. “what the heck? are you blind? he’s down bad for you!” 

“bad? if he had feelings for anyone, not just me, i think kirishima would be a little more considerate.” 

“but it’s bakugou,” kaminari chirped in. “he knows he won’t win if he doesn’t get you now.” 

“please, bakugou doesn’t win at everything.” 

mina raised an eyebrow. “but you already have feelings for bakugou, so technically he’s already winning.” 

you pursed your lips. “i guess, but if kirishima really had romantic feelings for me, he’d be less of an ass about it.” 

“is he going to the dance?” kaminari closed the curtain, rustling around to change back into his clothes once more. 

“i’m pretty sure.” you began sifting through clothes with mina. “bakugou said he’d go if i went. so i’m guessing kirishima is going to be there, too. bakugou and he are never apart.” 

mina slapped her thigh in disbelief. “do you hear yourself, babes?” she wore a stupid grin. “i haven’t seen those two together since...i don’t know, not for the past month. they’re fighting over you, whether you realize it, whether they realize it.” 

kaminari let out a false moan. “oh to have those two fighting over me.” he came out of the change room dressed in his own clothes. 

“did the costume not fit?” mina asked. 

“my fat ass is too fat for it. i’m too hot to be a pirate.” he posed, mimicking aoyama. 

“your ass is flatter than a pancake, kaminari.” 

you chuckled, but couldn’t help thinking about what mina was saying. as your two friends began chatting away, you lost yourself in your thoughts. 

- 

the three of you sat down for dinner at a cheap restaurant. mina and kaminari had bought a matching costume set, and you were still left without one. the two had left for the bathroom, leaving you sipping your own drink alone. 

your chest sank into your stomach when a familiar head full of red, the roots beginning to darken, stepped into the restaurant. he ordered what you’d guessed. 

he waited for the meal to be prepared for take out, rocking back and forth on his heels and whistling softly. 

thankfully, you felt someone rest a hand on your shoulder. you turned, expecting to see kaminari or mina attempting to save you. instead, you found a strange man. he looked to be around your age. you vaguely recognized his face. perhaps you’d seen him around yuuei before. 

uncomfortable, you shoved his hand off. “please go away.” 

kirishima blinked slowly when his eyes found you. you did not attempt to hide your annoyance. 

you wanted to tell both of them to go away as the man started flirting with you. it should be expected. this wasn’t the best place to be hanging out, either. 

you heard footsteps rushing up, and soon, a hand clamped around your wrist. you cried out as kirishima pulled you out of your seat. 

“do you have an issue?” he demanded, eyes boring into the man’s. 

the man licked his lips. “you seem like you have an issue, here.” his words slurred grossly. “we were over here minding our own business.” 

“they don’t want it.” kirishima snapped. 

“kirishima, i can handle this myself. you tried to shove off his grip. he let go, knowing that this wasn’t truly how he wanted to approach you. 

“see?” the man said. “they’re fine.” 

“get out of here.” 

“kirishima, what’re you-” 

the man put his hands up in surrender and wandered out. 

you pushed kirishima back. “what the hell?” 

“fine. be mad at me, but he was invading your space.” 

your brow furrowed. “you’re one to talk! do i need to put some kind of restraining order on you? you keep following me everywhere.” 

“not anywhere! this was a coincidence.” 

you shook your head. “it’s pointless trying to argue with you. you’re so toxic!” 

kirishima tongued the inside of his cheek. “think what you want, y/n. i could see you were uncomfortable, anyway.” 

“no, kirishima. i don’t need your saving. i don’t need you to swoop in and pretend like you’re my hero. you’re not. don’t talk to me again unless you’ve grown the hell up.” 

as if on queue, the bell rang and kirishima’s packaged dinner was presented in a paper bag. he gave you a good, long hard stare before taking his dinner and leaving. 

your chest heaved with anger. you wanted to make him angry. if he felt romantic feelings towards you, you wanted to make him jealous. 

you gave mina and kaminari a text that you’d be going home early. it was only a half-lie. you ran to hatsume’s dorm and knocked loudly. she opened the door without hesitation and grinned widely at the sight of you, already knowing you needed something. 

kirishima was obviously so damn jealous of bakugou, wasn’t he? mina was right. he wouldn’t be able to compete. and you were going to make sure he knew that. 

- 

the blaring lights, the music louder than bakugou’s explosions. students disguised as their favorite characters. 

it was hectic, you were right about that. 

kirishima stood beside him. they’d both decided to dress in their hero costumes. the tension between them was still unspoken. they felt like strangers. 

their eyes scanned the crowd, and bakugou’s landed on you first, kirishima following closely after. 

he couldn’t help the warm, victorious feeling in his chest as he glanced to the side at kirishima’s expression. 

- 

kirishima’s chest caved in. you’d dressed in...who had made it? 

“they’re dressed as...you,” he said, aghast. 

bakugou grinned, watching you dance under the lights in your own rendition of his hero costume, that orange x crossing your chest oh-so-nicely.

- - - 

tags: (if you want to be tagged in future parts, let me know!!) 

@heizenka @misssugarless 

[inkla-kirisame]

Theory: Baizhu is...?

Disclaimer: this is a theory, it doesn't have to be true, if its false, don't blame me, I warned you beforehand

Also, take this with humor and not to seriously

And spoilers of Liyue's or Xiao's lore

Ok let's begin with this

It seems that Baizhu is an outlander like Albedo or Amber's grandfather (just examples, they had nothing to do with this) but he does have a vision, a Liyuan one, but Zhongli didn't seem to know about him... So he is probably of Liyue or he has more than he looks like

So either Baizhu is a snake like creature (like a lamia), or is he an Adeptus?

Exhibit 1: let's take a look to his face

Author, more close

His face seems familiar... Were did I see it? Oh wait-

They had the same make up, and believe me when I said that almost all the Adepti use the same make up (only Madame Ping and Mountain Shaper (I think)) use that type

Also, Xiao and Baizhu have the same pupils

Ok, maybe I'm wrong but as I said before, don't take this seriously, but if it's true I f-ing called it

Exhibit 2: Baizhu's sickness

If you have Qiqi or talk with Herbalist Gui, you'll know that Baizhu has a sickness that made him frail, Qiqi mentions that even tho she's a zombie, she's much better than Baizhu

So why this is important?

I don't know what sickness he has but if this is true, I may know were he got his sickness

'Some of the archons' souls were filled with bitterness at their fate, and refused to suffer it any longer. Their bitterness materialized and became evil monsters. The monsters' rage manifested itself in the form of diseases, monster infestations, and all kinds of other strange occurrences' is a little extract of the book Yakshas: The Vigilant Adepti, you can see were this is going

So, I think Baizhu was a Yaksha, to be more precise, Bosacius

If you did the Yaksha's wish, you'll know that Bosacius was the missing Yaksha, and is presumably dead

In this quest you encounter his statement, were he leaves his wealth to the one that's fated to it, in simple terms, you

So, this is my theory, Bosacius was contaminated by the corruption and disease, so once his duties were done, he would end his suffering, but he might failed and/or was saved by Changsheng

If this is true, Changsheng might be like Qiqi, someone who has Adeptal energy or because an Adepti, but my only exhibits with this are that she can speak, that she's been with Baizhu for a very long time and that she's diurnal

But hey, before you said 'BuT oZ iS-!' Oz is probably a manifestation of Fischl's vision's powers

Either way, at some point, Bosacius changed his name to Baizhu and at some point meet Changsheng, later open (or began to work at) the Bubu Pharmacy, he took Qiqi in, while trying to cure his disease, hint why Herbalist Gui tell us that he's ill since they first met til today and hasn't gone better

And if you look at Baizhu for the very first time, would you tell me that he's sick? Because for me, he isn't

Now this could apply to Rouran but we 'haven't' met him nor have a model of him, neither more information about him other than he's male, the owner of Pearl Galley, we meet him without noticing, and that he is physically frail

So that it, that's the theory

I'm going to admit that I was planning on taking about his medicines because they mentioned that they are traditional, and I thought 'oh! Maybe Guizong showed him how to made them?'

Anyways, sorry for not posting here (I decided to work on many oneshots and never finished them), many things happened but I got a Diluc (in Zhongli's banner (yay!)) a Jean, Wolf's gravestone and another Mona (got one earlier) on the Wanderlust Invocation while trying to get the Primordial Jade-wingded Spear for Xiao and thanking Paimon that I don't need any 4 star of Ganyu's banner nor their constellations, and I don't want Ganyu honestly (for now) I waited since the beginning for Xiao and I will get him

Have a great day/night, stay safe, take care of your self and good luck with your pulls

And for the Xiao's simps or stans, keep going! We only need to suffer for like 20 days before his banner (if he goes first (which I hope so))

Edit 1 (18/1/2021) (don't know how many edits this will have):

Thanks for the likes, this literally blew up, and I really wanted to say that I appreciate it

Anyways, this edit is short because I just saw Baizhu's vision and a little thought I had so

Exhibit 3: Baizhu's vision

That vision chain thing and Xiao's shoulder pad (?) look so similar (for me) that I actually suffer through an Mandela effect (I thought that Baizhu's vision chain was identical to Xiao's shoulder pad)

This doesn't add to much but I kinda find it curious (if you want, picture me with the clown wig and make up, I don't blame you)

By the way, the daughter that Huixin mentions she has is Yaoyao? Honestly, it wouldn't surprise me, someone tasked Ganyu to take care of her, and that someone is working in the Ministry of civil affairs, and the first thing that comes in my mind if you ask me of someone who's Ganyu's underling, the first thing that comes to my mind is Yaoyao, if it's true tho... I called it!

[lesbianakaashi]

The Forgotten Shounen: Katekyo Hitman Reborn

This is not a “Why you should watch/read khr” or anything like that. This is just me going into the deep dive and throwing my findings at you. I’m making this because khr used to be my favourite series when I was 15 (I had plushees, posters, tradingcards, the art book etc) and now as an adult I constantly find myself baffled at how unknow it seems to be.

1. Okay first what is khr?

Katekyo Hitman Reborn! or just Reborn! is a series by Akira Amano which was published in Weekly Shounen Jump from 2004 to 2012 (with 42 volumes) and got an anime adaption which run from 2006 to 2010 on Tv Tokyo (with 202 episodes and one OVA).

2. What’s it about?

Khr is a parody of the italian mafia and plays in a world where the mafia is heavily influencial. The protagonist is the japanese middle schooler Sawada Tsunayoshi who is known as “No good Tsuna” because of his failing grades, general weak and cowardly personality and weak physics.

He becomes aware of the mafia world when a 2 year old baby called Reborn arrives at his house claiming to be the greatest hitman and declaring himself his home tutor. Reborn was send by the 9th head of the Vongola famiglia who is ready to retire and looking for a new heir. Which of course, is supposed to be Tsuna and now it's Reborns job to shape him into a worthy sucessor.

Tsuna rejects the violence of the mafia world and refuses the position as the 10th. Thanks to Reborn and his general craziness Tsuna meets different people and starts to make real friendships. Reborn wants 6 of those friends to be Tsuna's future guardians, basically a group of people which will be closest to him in the vongola famiglia. Tsuna might have no interest in those positions but the friendships he builds with them become really precious to him.

Reborns arrivial also brings in the enemies of the Vongola family which leads to Tsuna being forced to engage in battles. Generally Tsuna openly avoids fights and prefers to run away but will put himself in danger for his friends' sake or because of something Reborn did.

Through out the series Tsuna matures and gains strenght but he never becomes a power fantasy. He's just a guy with many flaws who grows through the human connections he makes.

Personally I think the relationship between Reborn and Tsuna is one of the best student teacher reltaionships in all of manga only topped by Mob and Reigen from Mob Psycho 100. Especially the last arc really underlines their unique relationship to me.

Furthermore, khr offers a new and unique battle system: The flames. I'm not gonna go into to too much detail but the general idea is that one fights with their dying will flame which basically turns off your the savety switch so you can fight with everything you have. The flames are seperated into different categories such as: sky, storm, mist, rain, sun, lightning and cloud and have different attributes asigned to each one. Tsuna's use of the sky flame and his transformation when using it is still one of my favourite shounen transformations to this day.

3. What happened?

The series did really well and then not so well over the course of its serialisation. After the manga got an anime adaption it increased in populairty and video games, light novels, and other products such as CDs were created based on the series. Reborn is one of the best selling series of Weekly Shōnen Jump and has sold around 30 Million volumes overall. It was and still is very popular in Japan but rather unknown in the west.

According to the article "The Rise and Fall of Weekly Shonen Jump: A Look at the Circulation of Weekly Jump" khr was the 10th bestselling series in Weekly Shōnen Jump, with a total of 7 million copies sold in 2007.

This number increasing to 15 milion in 2008. Which placed khr into the 4th best selling series of 2008 in Japan.

Between 2008 and 2010 those sales declined but still kept strong with khr as the 6th top selling manga in 2009, 8th best selling in 2010 and then 24th best selling in 2012.

In November 2014, readers of the Da Vinci magazine voted khr number 17 on a list of Weekly Shōnen Jump's greatest manga series of all time.

After the anime came to an apprupt stop in 2010 for unknown reasons the manga sells took a visible hit. (Apparently the studio wanted to put the anime on halt because they were busy with other projects and give Akira Amano time to develop her story but I couldn't find any source for this claim) Furthermore, the rushed last chapters of the manga in 2012 declined the popularity of the series even more. There's no offical statement as to why the manga was ended in such a way but it's reasonable to assume that Jump either cut it considering the decreasing sales or Akira Amano choose to end it for personal reasons.

Nontheless, Tsuna not being included in Jump Force (a fighting game where you can play as different characters from Jump) in 2019 even tho he made it in earlier Jump Stars games also underlines the decreased interest in the series.

Rumors on a reboot or anime adaption of the last two arcs surface from time to time but are genereally unlikely. Artland the studio which made khr has gone bankrupt around 2015-2016. It might be taken on by another studio but rather uncommen especially with such an old series.

4. Art style

The khr anime ended over 10 years ago and the old art style might not be appealing to newer audiences.

Especailly because the anime adaption follows Akira Amanos old art style which heavily developed within the years. Here a picture comparing characters in the new art style:

A modern anime adaption in the new art style would be aesthetically pleasing. It would probably look similiar to Psycho Pass since Akira Amano did the concept art for this series.

(My personal art student hot take is that both art styles are unique and fun. Up to this day Akira Amano still has my favourite art style and even if the amount folds in the characters clothing is a little extreme I love it dearly.)

5. Criticism

The show is not without flaws and even if I greatly enjoy it it wouldn't be right not to adress them.

Daily Life Arc:

A lot of people view the first 20 to 25 episodes as fillers and quickly lose intererst in the series. This is due to the fact that Akira Amano inteded the series to be a gag manga and focuses the first chapters on world building, character introduction and comical narratives. It's rumored that the decision to develop the story into a battle shounen was made because the sales weren't doing well enough at first. So the first chapters/episodes may seem titidious but are necessary for the story and the development of the characters. The tonal shift from a more gintama like gag manga to a darker battle focused story can also be offputting to some viewers.

Either way a lot of people blame this arc when discussing why khr never got an english dub or didn't end up on Toonami. I've also read that the manga never finished serializing in the north america. However, it finished in other western languages like german and spanish.

Censoring:

The anime censors A LOT. From Gokudera's smoking habit, Yamamoto's whole character arc which deals with heavy themes such as depression and suicidal thoughts. The general bloodiness of the manga was censored and sometimes whole chapters and characters were left out even if those were important to the devolopment of others.

Filler episodes:

Out of the 202 episodes the anime has around 29 filler episodes which makes roughly 14 %.

Sexism:

Even if Reborn was written by a woman most female characters are rather flat and their storylines often tied to a male character in one way or another.

Genereal things:

Khr, like many other long running series, is sometimes criticised for a lack of world building or unpopular narrative choices.

6. Hope?

Khr isn't exactly dead. As stated before the series is still very popular in Japan and still gets new merch pretty regulary. There are also petitions floating around for a reboot or a new anime season but those never get a lot of traction. Furthermore #Reborn2期アニメ化 (#Reborn2ndAnimation) used to get some traction on twitter not too long ago. Last year the Anime News Network did a poll on which anime the readers would like to see a rebooot of and khr placed second.

Either way here's a collection of recent khr things I could find.

- In 2018 a new bluray set was released in north america

- The khr stage play reached yet another new season

- A mobile game was released last year

- Currently ongoing anime cafe event called "Concerto di Vongola"

- Last month there was an event with the former VAs and stage play actors where they discussed their favourite khr episodes.

- There has been an increase in blind reacts to the openings on youtube which might bring in a new fan base. The biggest one I could find had around 90k views and was made in 2019. On this note check out the soundtrack. The first openeing Drawing Days by SPLAY still makes me go insane (but I'm biased of course)

There also renewed hope for a new season/reboot because Shaman King, Inuyasha and Bleach got anounced for new seasons after a long hiatus. It's important to keep in mind that the circumstances for those series are differnt tho. For example bleachs new anime is often tied to the immense success of the gatcha game.

7. Conclusion

Khr is a series which used to be a flagship for Weekly Shounen Jump and is deeply beloved by it's fans, especially in Japan. It influenced other shounen series like bnha. It would be nice to see it gaining a bigger fanbase in the west :)

[grungeeuvu]

1. How many works do you have on Ao3?

I have 18 :)

2. What's your total Ao3 word count?

My total is 412,016!! It's going to increase tomorrow tho once I update lol

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently, I write for Haikyuu and TGCF! I'm hoping to post my KNY and SVSSS wips soon, so add them to the list of behind the scene things

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 

-1 Theseus Never Falls [DSMP, 887 kudos]

-2 Fashion Disaster [Haikyuu!!, 650 kudos]

-3 Cheap Villain's Presentation On The Importance Of Road Safety [TGCF, 293 kudos]

-4 Wide Enough For Two [Haikyuu!!, 210 kudos]

-5 Not Your Typical 'Damsel In Distress' Story [Haikyuu!!, 198 kudos]

5. Do you respond to comments?

Pretty much always!! There are a few I sometimes forget to or just have no clue what to say but otherwise I always try to say something :))

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably my (very shitty) Sanders Sides Remile oneshot, which ended in major character death.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

That's a bit tough lol - I think that it would most likely be my Haikyuu KogaGoshi oneshot! Most of my fics have happy endings but none are really finished lol

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've once received a really shitty comment about how I wasn't updating enough but that was it ://

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I have never written any smut but I am beginning to warm up to the idea of it? I think?

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Never written any particularly crazy crossovers, or any at all, I don't think...

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I've had a screenshot of one of my wattpad fics uploaded on pinterest without my knowledge or consent but that's it (as far as I know). However, I have been accused of stealing one of my own fics!! lol

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, a few! We never got round to finishing them tho

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

OOOH THAT'S TOUGH!!! Either FengQing, BingQiu or KyouHaba, I think. I can't choose between those three

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I really REALLY want to finish my 'Come Lie With My Bones' or 'Spells And Slipups', but since they're both a series of fanfics, I don't know if I'll be able to :(

16. What are your writing strengths?

Comedy and dialogue! Apparently my angst is rather good too :D

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I'd say action and plot - I struggle at sticking to plots and action I feel I draw out too much

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I'm not against it, but I'd probably have to use google translate or latch onto an online friend for help (I'd state in notes if I used google translate).

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Sanders Sides! I wrote a book/trilogy called Fantasizing A War back in lockdown :) It was ✨shit✨ but popular lol

20. Favourite fic you've written?

I think that's Another One Bites The Dust, out of loyalty. However, my WIP, The Intrigue Of Galactic Professors, is seriously growing on me haha

Tagging @astrowaffles, @spacejammie-eimmajecaps and anyone else who'd like to join :))

20 Q's for Fic Writers

Another tag from @assorted-candy, thank you!

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 

193 as of now! Wow that's more than I thought I'd have.

2. What's your total Ao3 word count?

1,537,974! That's about what I expected actually xD

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Well I got dragged into the Danny Phantom fandom recently as I'm sure you all can tell. The show was actually a really big part of my childhood, but this is the first time I've been actively in the fandom, go figure! Of course I'm still in the Sanders Sides fandom, and I'm back once again in the Phineas and Ferb fandom, still chipping away at that long fic I've been working on for a while.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 

These aren't too surprising to me, as they're also my fics with the most hits.

5. You Just Didn't Notice with 349 kudos (dear god please don't go find that one it's from so long ago I can't bear to look at it).

4. Warm with 356 kudos! I think this is the touch starved light sides au I wrote! Yeah I'm still fond of that one

3. By Any Other Name has 365 kudos! Still think fondly of my time writing that one, it was so fun.

2. Consequences with 420 kudos! Honestly I'm a little surprised this one is in my top 5 I guess a lot of people just really liked it.

Protector! Yeah, no surprises here. This one seriously blew up on me, it's got more hits than any other work I've ever posted on AO3. 504 kudos!

5. Do you respond to comments?

Sure do! I make an effort to respond to every single one I get if I can, unless I just cannot for the life of me think of anything to say. And I do read all of them, rest assured that even if all you get is a "Thank you!" that I loved and appreciated your comment, and that I mean those "Thank you"s every time.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Honestly, I'm not sure, most of my fics tend towards happier endings, even if the time before that sucks ass for everyone involved. I could pick any number of one shots from series, but I'm not sure those count as complete stories, since most of one shot series do actually tell a story. Oh you know what, I'm looking through my stuff and it's "Denied Reconciliation" for Roleslaying With Roman. Yeah nothing's getting better in that one.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

This might sound weird for anyone who's read the fic, but in my mind I think it might be Protector? I listen to "Carry On" by Fun whenever I think about the ending for that fic because it fits the vibe so well, and because that's what the ending is about. Everyone is going to move on and live their lives to the fullest. Not everything's going to be sunshine and rainbows, but the characters don't want that anyway. They get to work to fix things and they have a chance for a really good and full and fulfilling life coming for them. What's happier than that?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not really, actually, I'm very fortunate in that everyone seems to get that I'm just trying to share stories I love writing for fandoms and characters that I love. Thanks to all my readers, y'all are the best!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Nope! Not necessarily because I'm completely opposed to the idea, I have technically written a couple makeout fics, but when it comes to smut I feel like I'm too ace to know what I'm doing xD

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I don't, mostly just cause they don't scratch my brain in the way that inspires writing for me. I've read some really amazing ones and I definietly come up with some in my head from time to time, but I'm not sure I'll ever actually write one.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Thankfully no, or at least not that I know of.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yep! I'm currently writing and co-posting Defense Mechanisms with VorpalGirl on AO3, and I brainstorm enough with her and with my QPP @mishiitake-mushrooms that I end up putting them in the author's notes with credit quite a bit, and in my mind, that counts!

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Honestly I don't ship nearly as much as I used to. This may be a bit of a cop-out answer, but I find myself getting way more invested in sibling dynamics lately. I'm loving writing about Phineas and Ferb and Candace in my long fic, and Danny and Jazz in my new AU. Even in Sanders Sides, I'm tending more towards Roman and Remus lately, and of course brotherly dukexiety will have my heart until the end of everything. If I had to pick one, it would probably honestly be Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy in Pride and Prejudice? Kind of an out of left field answer, but I love how much both of them change in the book and I love how their romance is handled. Jane Austen is good at romance, I know, hot take.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have a Light Side Virgil AU where Virgil was a light side from the start that I still absolutely love, but I'm not sure I'll finish at this point. I still want to, I've just got so much going on that it's going to be a while if I ever get to it.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue and plot! Sometimes I write what I jokingly refer to as my "stick two characters in a room together" fics where I do exactly that and just let them talk to each other. It's some of my favorite writing to do, actually. And I absolutely adore getting to plan and figure out plots and watch everything as it comes together as I write. Story epiphanies are the best.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I struggle a bit with action scenes, since character and dialogue are my strong suit writing characters just doing a whole bunch of stuff is difficult (especially if it's a fight scene, woof.)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I am definitely not strong enough in any languages other than maybe French to pull it off, but I think it's really cool when people do it!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

My Little Pony Friendship is Magic. I was 12 no you can't see them.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

I'm not sure I have one, honestly? I have this thing that happens where I put all of my excitement and energy into whatever fic I'm currently writing xD

I do definitely have a couple that are very close to my heart for various reasons, though. Protector was my first fic that went over 100,000 words, and for that as well as numerous other reasons I'm very proud of it! Hope With Me turned out almost exactly how I pictured it in my head which is, like, crazy to me. I did a shit ton of math I'm really proud of for Three Minutes Less. I did coding for Seeking Advice. I wrote a bit about how I think aplatonicism would work in Friendship is Magic in Same Conclusion, which is the one MLP fic from me you get to see.

I don't know, I don't really want to name a favorite fic I've ever written, that takes away the possibility that I could still write it in the future! And yeah, I get the question is really asking "favorite fic so far," but... I don't know, I like too many of my fics for different reasons. I hope that's not too much of a cop-out answer.

Tagging @anxious-mess19, @sometimes-love-is-enough, and @prince-rowan-of-the-forest again, still no pressure!

[cloudsrust]

I feel like you'd draw Grimsley, Cynthia, or Elesa from Pokemon. Their designs seem to be right up your alley.

(Gonna answer all here since tumblr replies are a bit clunky,,)

All three are actually among my top faves! Grimsley especially with that style of his- especially his kimono look for which I just die for (which is apparently from Sun/Moon? Damn I missed so much not finishing it;;). Cynthia.. well she's just Cynthia- what's not to love? She gotta be one of the most pokèmon characters ever,, Elesa- absolutely loved her style in BW but I just fell in love with her B2W2 version- the contrast of that big, puffy jacket with her slimmer outfit is just.. *chef kiss* in my book. But- intimidated by such gender characters- I never attempted to draw 'em;; Been tempted to draw Grimsley for a while tho-

(Rest is underneath)

Omg how could I forget about them!! I think they were even my favourite elite 4 in HeartGold- heck shame on me for having to check who they were- (even though I think it was because names in italian are always different- poor guy named Pino.) With my love for masked characters I'm also surprised I never drew 'em.

(I already replied in the comments but yeah dfdsd)

As I said I only know Guzma as the "goofy bad guy who either isn't actually bad or had an hard past- oh also he loves his lil' Wimpod" that I usually see in fanarts- and if that's him, I love him :,> But since I never even met him in game I had no chance to draw him,,

Lysandre instead- other than him being an ass, I'd say he was unlucky to be in X/Y since it just didn't stuck with me :/ so I just- kinda forgot about him. He got so much style tho,,

Will I can see why some would think I drew 'em before- but.. why Chili? He even ironically was the only one of the twins I left out my tier list since I was just neutral about him dsdjsd. Never drew the fire waiter- that hair would be a nightmare to translate in my style too,,

Honestly? I think the only thing that stopped me from drawing him was the fact I just could not draw guys when I was obsessed with him;; (talking back when BW came out so- almost 10 years ago? Damn.). Absolutely adore him as a character and his story/theories still gives me the chills- should really consider doodling him sometime.

Oh I feel that honestly- I have gaps all over the place with both characters and pokemons, either because of memory or not having played that version ahah

But both of them, even though I haven't drawn either? Absolutely loved them,, both being stylish mysterious strangers that just decide to help/fight you on your journey- 10/10 in my book.

I'm extremely surprised that no one guessed the characters- I mean they were just 3.. with me not even saying from which games they were from so... understandable dfdjhf Two of them just seemed so obvious tho! Especially since I think I even talked about them a bit or even outright said I drew them but never posted it at some point-

But there were some really good guesses, my taste does actually shine through the characters I choose to draw as I thought then-!

[tuulikannel]

1, 2, and 3 for the ask game please!

Thanks for the ask, @solarsavoy!

1) Who is your favorite character to write for and is this the character you find easiest to write for?

Hmm… so I’ve written 16 fics for Assassination Classroom, and 13 of them are about Gakushuu. So, yeah, I think it’s safe to say he holds that position right now. ^^ And yeah, I think he’s pretty easy to write, too. The easiest? Maybe. Some other characters I struggle with much more (like Nagisa, for example) but Gakushuu’s voice just… comes to me without much thinking at all. I don’t know… maybe it’s just that I’ve always enjoyed his kind of characters. Reserved characters with misleading exterior (as solarsavoy put it ^^) who are not simply black or white.

2) What is your favorite fic of yours?

Oh boy. What a question. May I cheat and choose one for all of my main fandoms? ^^;

1) I’ll start with the oldest fandom, which is Yugioh (which, I bet, many didn’t even know. xD most of those fics are only on ff.net). I think the last one I wrote for that fandom is the one I liked best: the crossover with Solaris, which I’ve simply named Solaris, cause I suck with titles. ^^;; (Solaris the movie, as at the time I hadn’t read Stanislav Lem’s book, tho it doesn’t really make any big difference here.)

I don’t know, I just a) love weird crossovers, and b) remember I was very invested in this story when I was writing it. Which you might not believe, given that it took me over 4 years to finish a fic with 5 chapters. The thing is, when I started writing it I was already falling out of YGO fandom and fic writing in general. The fact that the fic wasn’t left unfinished is in fact the proof of how much I liked it. I ­had­ to finish it, no matter how long it took.

2) Then, my next big fandom was Hikaru no Go. I think my favorite of these fics (32 in total btw) must be the newest that’s still a WIP, Caught Between. It’s been such a huge project for me. Never before have I literally read entire books for fic research. It’s just that it deals with a delicate subject, intersex, and I (as a cis female) really wanted to do my absolute best not get things wrong. I’m so happy I finally started posting it after sitting on it nearly a decade, and I’m really relieved that the reception has been so positive. In a world of black and white, be 💜 ^^

3) And then it’s AssClass’s turn. Hmm. This is the hardest, by far. Maybe Blind Alley. That fic simply has a place in my heart, and I can’t even exactly explain why. Maybe because I’m a sucker for sad things? I don’t know. (All the Gifts might yet steal it’s place, depending on how well I manage to wrap it up, one of these days.)

3) What fic of yours do you think is underrated?

Looking at the ones I just named as my favorites, I got to say Solaris. It’s understandable, I guess, given how long I took to finish it. I’m afraid I lost a lot of readers then. On the other hand, it’s really not been popular at all on AO3 either (the only YGO fic I’ve posted there), tho maybe that is cause I just posted it all in one go there.

Also, of the AssClass fics, the prequel to All the Gifts, which goes by The Fall cause, like I said, I’m bad at naming stuff. I like that ficlet a lot, but it’s not got any big audience.

(And just so Hikago won't feel left out, cause I mentioned now something for the other two fandoms: The Sun Prince and the Frog. XD It's such a stupid story, but I like it. And even tho The Eve of the Battle is short and weird, I think it'd deserve more than 3 kudos.)

[manchesterau]

my thoughts after reading my policeman: SPOILERSS of course!! (ignore spelling or grammar mistakes) (this is very ramble-y and not as in depth as it could have been sorrryyy lol, if you want specifics send me an ask after reading this)

okay...so i read the book in 3 days....which....im very proud of myself bc it takes me so long to finish books but that’s not why you are reading this.

im not going to lie to you...i liked the book. i love angst, and this had plenty of it and i liked it. if you like books such as: harry potter, six of crows, red queen, red white and royal blue you will not like this book. i know many people found it boring, which yeah i can see that, but i didn't find it boring at all. but mostly because i love boring books but that's beside the point. 

the book flowed easily, there isn't a bunch of raunchy sex scenes that ive seen people say it has (i...the things ive read idk what book they even read????) and Tom does has backward views on marriage and what it means to be a wife. but he is not overtly sexist or misogynist or abusive, or subvertly those things either. to be frank he's a scared gay man in the 50s trying to not get caught and thrown in jail. that's literally it. (ill go more into detail on him later). but if you want to read this book i recommend you go in knowing that there will be homophobia (the word queer is used as a slur....3 times or 4 but no more than 5), expect outing, expect not supportive characters, and remember to have some compassion (more on this later).

next i want to go into characters: starting with tom, then Marion, then Patrick, and then the other characters. so if you are planning on reading this book or just dont want to be spoiled them....don't read the next bit.

Tom:

I'm going to get this out of the way.........Tom (who we never get to know outside of the two-point of views we are presented with, and who is being played by Harry) is a police officer in the 50s UK. to be frank when the rumors first went around I was mad like a lot of people were, which is funny because when we got those pictures of harry reading the book before all the speculation we were....happy, that he was reading a book about a gay man. now...I don't care honestly. I could call out the hypocrites (i won't) and honestly I'm hypocritical myself. I use to watch shows like svu (if you were to turn it on right now I wouldn't turn it off) and I enjoyed watching svu. I know and have seen a lot of mutuals, people on my dash enjoy cop shows like b99, or who like actors who have played the character of police before. so it would be hypocritical of me to be mad at him (this is just my single black opinion) and then go and turn on svu (which I don't do anymore). 

I'm not saying that no one can be mad, I'm not saying that the anger people have at him playing this role is bad or not needed or valid. all I'm saying is.....is that I don't care. I got angry over this months ago, and all that anger I felt I don't have anymore, and I can't tell you why. Harry is playing an abusive demented husband who traps his wife in a simulation, and then he will play a gay policeman trying not to face persecution..........and that's that. nothing I can say will reach him, he's playing these roles and there is nothing I can do. will I watch them (pirating of course) yes.

anyways let's get back to tom's character (do not use my opinion to silence other black people I will find you....don't do that shit weirdo): tom is......tom?? like I literally was expecting the worst when I read this because of what other people had to say. but as I'm reading him through the eyes of Marion (his wife) and through the eyes of Patrick (his...true love, fuck the 50s I hate the 50s) one word came to mind constantly: scared. Tom is very scared that he will be found out and his life will be ruined. His family knows about him, which is why I think his father (more on him later) pushed him to be in the national service (where he was a cook, which disappointed him). you don't realize his family knows and then his sister says something and then you go 'wait....THEY KNEW???' and then you will go 'oh so that's why-' 

tom does have old fashion views that you would expect of any man at that time (gay or not it's the 50s and gay men are still capable of saying sexist shit). when asked by Patrick if women should still work after having a kid he said no it's the men's job to provide, Marion said she would like to keep working, he said no when they do have a baby (they literally never did, and idk why he thought he could be intimate with her for that long to produce a baby lol). that's....the most sexist thing he said in the whole book (there maybe some small things im forgetting but nothing that really stood out). that's it. I know it's not small and that was a legitimate issue in the 50s but yeah. Just in case you were apprehensive about Tom's character being a raging woman-hater, no,....he just wasn't a true feminist yet (???? I don't know that's like..the most this book says about an issue women were facing at this time). It's still bad what he said (you'll see how Marion justifies it in the book and both Patrick and her don't agree and try and challenge him on his view).

i dont want to go too in depth but it is very obvious from the beginning he has no and i mean ZEROOOO interest in her at all (you can tell when it hits him that he needs a wife and he starts to act a littleee different but it's not romantic at alll). 

i feel like my review on tom is shit but like!! we don't really get to know him without bias from Patrick and Marion. I think Harry will play a wonderful Tom (even tho he doesn't not fit the description for Tom...at all....like at alllll).

To summarize Tom: very scared gay man from the 50s who is trying to do everything he can to not be found out. his family knows, even he knew at a young age, and yes he does quit being a police officer but it doesn't happen as soon as id like but then again he wasn't one for that long if you pay attention to the years.

Marion:

😑 

i just...if yall could see the notes i made on her.....

To summarize Marion: SHE IS LIVING IN LALA LAND, TOM LITERALLY SHOWS HER NO ROMANTIC INTEREST AT ALLL, AND WHEN SHE METS PATRICK FOR THE FIRST TIME SHE FREAKING NOTICES THAT HE'S ALL BLUSH-Y AND SHIT LIKE...GIRL.....

this is a note i wrote that sums up her and tom's relationship (which is more like friends then anything romantic i mean god their honeymoon was horrible and he proposed to her....nvm 😑)

listen...i can't lie and say i didn't feel sorry for her up until the end when she (spoilers: she outs patrick to his employer which ends up with him getting arrested). after that...ive never hated a character more in my fucking LIFEEEE like oh my god i was pissed

all she does is have fantasies about him being romantic with her (holding hands, hugging, etc) and none of them come true...BECAUSE HES GAYYYYYY i really....the author could have done a better job because there were so many damn red flags.

she's fucking annoying and whiny and yeah it sucked to be a woman in the 50s but you literally outed someone your husband was in love with and thought that you could just go back to being married like he's not devastated and instead of telling what you did you stayed unhappy and made your husband thing that at any point they were coming for him too.......*****

Patrick:

PATRICKKKKK

Patrick and tom deserved a fighting fucking chance i hate the fuck 50s fuck you 50s!!!! I absolutely LOVEDDD his pov and seeing Tom through his pov like it was just so damn refreshing seeing the world through his eyes and how he navigates his queerness in the society they live in. (the dichotomy between a proud gay man and a scared maybe proud but fear overrules that (talking about Tom here) gay man).

There was a lot more to say on how gay men were being persecuted at this time than how women were treated in this particular book. There were some little things here and there about what was expected of Marion as a wife and of a girl/woman at that time but it wasn't the focus.

I loved seeing the way Patrick navigated through his world of art and creativity. And how Tom seemed to fit right in with him.

I hate the things the author made Patrick go through (outed, sent to prison, stripped of his job, and later on in the present day he has had 2 strokes in his 70s). it felt a bit much but it's not too distracting (Patricks pov takes place in the past as he writes in his journal). 

Patrick and Julia (more on her later) are my two favorites in the whole book (Tom is third bc he's a very multi-facted character, Marion is not even on the list) and I wish we got a lot more of Patrick's pov.

Other characters!! (speed round bc this is wayyy too long):

Syvlie (Tom's sister): SYVLIEEE IM MAD AT YOUU I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU WHYY WHYYY

Julia: JULIAAAAA QUEEENNN (you'll see why i love her at the end) 

Tom's parents: his father is abusive point-blank. or at least i think he's abusive (verbally). as im writing this i am now realizing that the way Tom's mom reacts to him (sometimes crying) is bc they knew he was gay omg wow.

tom's dad is very much a man's man guy?? Picture a sexist man from the 50s....now picture him with a gay son.....yeah, I'm not surprised Tom went into national service then to the police force. you can tell he didn't want anyone to find out about Tom so he pushed him to do what he thought best and Tom went with it, scared. 

overall: please do not go into this book expected things to be all flowers and rainbows...this is a book about two gay men in the 50s yall.....

there is something to be said about the tragedy that is in a lot of queer stories, I'm more interested in how white these stories are (that's a rant for another time). but I don't mind my policeman, and i think stories like this should be told. because this actually happened (here is a link to em forster's story where the author takes inspiration from, he really had an affair with a policeman!!! who had a wife!!!).

the ending is bittersweet, and i couldn't help but curse for what could have been. Marion could have not outed Patrick (which she instantly regretted), she could have gotten a divorce (she even contemplated it), they could have been more secretive, Julia could have not said what she said. I think Patrick and Tom were sadly doomed from the start, I just wish they had more time together because I loved seeing their love (the little glimpse we got) bloom into something bigger than them.

thank you for reading!! here are random screenshots of my notes as i read this lol enjoy!!

can’t*

[seventhrounder]

I went thru my folder with old hockey magazines I had saved from around 2011 to 2015 and came across this one and thought it could be a fun to make a post about now in hindsight.

This is Jääkiekko magazine from May 2012, they always have a section of "99 questions with ..." and in this issue they interviewed Teräväinen.

I’ve translated the questions I found interesting under the cut! It ended up being about half of the interview. (*) are my additions.

On the cover "seuraava superjokeri" means the next super joker, he played for Helsingin Jokerit so it's a word play from that. Under, on the blue print it says: "The 17-year-old forward will become a first round draft pick in the summer. The natural goal scorer can dominate in SM-Liiga as soon as next season."

In the 2nd photo the headline and lead paragraph goes:

"A post with dents* - A year ago Teuvo Teräväinen was known only within a small number of hockey insiders. Few passers-by recognize him now either but after a flashy rookie season the Jokerit sensation is on the radar of every NHL team and is a strong contender to become a first round draft pick. Next season with Jokerit the talented second line center will be one of the main talking points in the SM-Liiga."

(*references the net Teräväinen had in his backyard and into which he practiced his shooting)

3. You've been described as a magician, top scorer, wunderkind and a prodigy. What do you think of these descriptions?

TT: Heh, those are some descriptions yeah. What can I really say? Don't really wanna comment on them much.

4. How nervous are you about the Draft?

TT: I try not to be nervous as best as I can. In a way I don't have anything to be nervous about since I don't care which team picks me or at what number I go.

6. Which is stressing you more, English interviews or physical tests?

TT: Maybe both. Bench press (laughs) and English interviews can be tough.

12. How far along have you planned your career with, for example, your parents or your agent?

TT: Haven't really planned things with others but I've thought about them myself. I try to go step by step and not jump too far ahead.

14. How does it feel to be so young with all the star players in Jokerit?

TT: How to say it? I haven't felt like I was young but a part of the team instead. The team's been very good with me and they haven't been looking down at me like: "oh he's young". It's been fun to play in an experienced team.

15. Is there a generational gap between players?

TT: You can see the age difference, older players look older but we're all childish, at least with our topics.

17. What does a 17-year-old do in the sauna nights of the team?

TT: I actually haven't been in any yet. I've always been at national team's camps or something.

19. Did you get the number you wanted?

TT: I did, yeah. I could've taken #18 but Semir (Ben-Amor) has it. But i'm happy with #86, it's good.

23. What are your strengths as a player?

TT: Offensive play and with that playing with the puck, passing, IQ, power play and skill, just the usual skill - skill with hands.

24. And weaknesses?

TT: They are to do with defensive play, strength and physicality. Battles and such but I think I took a step forward last season. That's a good thing.

25. Have you ever been "pressed into a mold" or has your playing style gotten to develop naturally?

TT: As a kid the play was mostly offensive/attacking, I didn't have to think about playing defence. Up until 15 years old, I got to attack pretty freely. Playing defence became more important when I started to play in A-juniors a couple seasons ago.

26. On a scale from 1 to 10 how determined are you?

TT: Maybe 8, feels like an 8.

32. What kind of role are you planning to take with Jokerit next season?

TT: I think a pretty big one. I try to be a top player and not just take others' example but give others example myself too. So that someone in the team can take something out of the way I do things on the ice and off the ice.

35. If you could pick anyone, who would be your car driver?

TT: Nico Manelius for sure. He's been my driver this season. I've had others too, like Riku Hahl but he's not nearly at the same level. Nico’s clearly the best.

36. What are the most important qualifications to be a good driver?

TT: The car is obviously important. Hahl's car is totally awful, he takes a lot of heat for it from the guys too. I wouldn't dare driving with him. Manelius is a steady performer, never lets you down.

38. What sports did you play as a 10-year-old?

TT: Hockey and floorball, probably football (soccer) during the summers at the time too.

42. When did you decide to focus only on hockey?

TT: So when I stopped playing other sports? Three years ago, before that floorball was kind of a side thing, I played a couple of games in the regular season and playoffs.

45. Do you follow floorball or other sports? Go to games?

TT: I don't go to games but I like to watch floorball on TV, it's an interesting sport. Sometimes I watch football too but I don't follow it much. Feels like they never score there.

47. Have you ever played with a wooden stick?

TT: As a kid I did play with a wooden stick.

49. You won the hockey players' golf tournament last summer even though there were more experienced players too. Are you good with all stick games?

TT: Well, I've been pretty good in all of them. I've played golf for a long time and still play it.

50. How is your swing?

TT: Pretty bold, kind of a hockey swing. I don't really care where the ball goes - as long as it goes far.

52. What do you think of off-ice training?

TT: Let's just say it's more stupid than being on the ice but you still gotta do it to be better on the ice.

56. Which word describes your professional relationship (with his coach, Tomek Valtonen), tranquil or colorful?

TT: Colorful of course. At times we're joking around, other times it's more serious but the relationship is really good.

57. Coaching you has been described in many words: good, bad, worse. What are they?

TT: Heh, well... I won't tell them here. He (Tomek) keeps the discipline during practices but sometimes when things haven't gone to a plan I've had to jump on an exercise bike in the middle of a practice.

58. What have been the reasons?

TT: I'll quote Tomek: "when I haven't been present".

59. Have you ever tried to turn the resistance of the bike to zero?

TT: (Laughs) Of course I have and sometimes I've even succeeded.

60. Describe your diet in three words?

TT: Greasy, healthy and good!

64. Your first name is not common for people your age. How did your parents come up with it?

TT: I actually don't even know. Maybe they didn't want a usual Ville*....

(*very common name for men of all ages in Finland)

66. Which of these is the most important: skill, unexpectedness or courage?

TT: Skill!

68. Your longest video game stint?

TT: Six hours, at least. I've played a lot of War of Duty lately.

72. The dumbest thing that has made you upset in hockey?

TT: Probably if I didn't get an assist on a goal even though I should have. Or even worse is if I score and they mark it down for someone else.

79. Have you had any concussions?

TT: I haven't had any, I've managed to always dodge them.*

(*ouch, tho it's good the recent one is his only as far as i remember)

84. In 2011 Team Finland finished in the 5th place at the U-18 tournament. Why only as 5th?

TT: Because we lost to Team Russia in the quarter final, just as well we could have won that game too.

89. You didn't get to be on the ice to accept the SM-Liiga bronze medal (because of the U-18's). When and where did you get it?

TT: I actually still haven't received it, I don't know where it is.

93. What is the population of Helsinki?

TT: There's like 5 million people in Finland so maybe around 500k in Helsinki? (to be exact 596k) Did i really get it right...?

94. Who's the mayor of Helsinki?

TT: I don't know, I barely know the president.

95. Do you think the municipalities in the capital city area should merge?

TT: Luckily I don't have to decide but they probably shouldn't.

96. What do you check first in the news paper?

TT: The sports section.

97. Your favorite tv show?

TT: Putous* was pretty good, I liked a lot of the characters. The grandma was pretty good.

(*Finnish live improvisation comedy/sketch show (there are still new seasons, the latest just finished). Every actor comes up with a humor character with a catchy phrase and one of them wins. "The grandma" is Marja Tyrni and I just got such flashbacks from typing this sentence.)

98. Last book you read?

TT: I don't read many books. The last book was a study book, a Finnish book. I wrote an essay on Tiki (Esa) Tikkanen's biography. An eventful book, great career and a lot of chirps.

99. Who should we ask the 99 questions next?

TT: Riku Hahl could have good stories, he's also seen a lot of the world.

[arsenicbruise]

Books I read in September and my Review :))

1. everything I know about love - dolly allerton 4/5

This is was my first non-fiction book I’ve read . Still felt like a novel because of how the author told her experiences and the book was actually interesting. It was close to 5 stars but got boring at the end kind of , I think every young woman should read this :))

2. lolita -Vladimir Nabokov - no rating

well , I refused to read this novel for such a long time but I decided for once and all to end up with this misery . Nabokovs writing is not only amazing but also captivating if we decide to ignore the theme of the novel . Humbert is not only an unreliable narrator but also a disgusting and beyond inmoral, not only did he killed Charlotte ( Dolores mother ) but also raped lo , and overly Sexualized her . I’m not going to lie , I do skimmed some pages because it made me Overall super uncomfortable, I don’t want any of y’all to romanticize this story , because if you do I’ll believe you didn’t read it , or either have no conscience to understand it .

3.Eileen-ottessa moshfegh 2/5

I had super high expectations for This book after reading my year of rest and relaxation honestly . Not only was this book boring but the main character was overall super annoying , trust me I’m all for unlikealble main characters that Ottessa usually presents on her novels , Eileen was not it .

4.the metamorphosis -franz Kafka-4/5

This was a really short book I finished in one sitting , while being philosophical it was also really interesting. I believe Gregor deserved better I hated how his family changed drastically with him after his transformation basically getting rid of him . Shows how no one will love you if you’re unattractive.I wish It was longer

5.the myth of Sisyphus-Albert Camus 4/5

“The stranger “ being my first camus book , I also enjoyed this one , even though it was quite hard to read I loved the topics it talked about such as how life has no meaning or purpose but we as humans have to find our own in order to have happiness .

6.speak- Laurie Halse Anderson-4/5

I really really enjoyed this book . I think it’s very popular and I wish it was longer tho . I think it’s a really great representation for rape victims and brings awareness to it . Melinda truly deserved better her parents never seemed to listen and all her so called “ friends “ were just truly Shitty. It was heartbreaking, but at least the ending was great . ( art teacher king )

7. The becoming of Noah Shaw - Michelle hodkin3/5 ( 4th book of Mara and Noah story)

I was looking forward to read this book since June after finishing the last book of the Mara dyer series ( this being the practical continuation) I expected so much more because Noah and Mara are forever my comfort couple but it felt weird and also sad , I didn’t like how slow it was at first ( loved that we got a lot of marashaw scenes ) but I feel like David should’ve stayed alive and Michelle coulve done a better plot with it . Also the ending got me sad and I’m still not over it , even tho I did enjoyed it I think it could’ve been better I hope the reckoning is different .

8.the torn skirt -Rebecca Godfrey 4/5

I think I should’ve given this book 5 stars but there’s something that stopped me to do so .

The sorry follows a girl named Sarah Shaw , a depressed girl who spends her time with her friends who spend their time doing drugs and drinking . Sarah is a girl who is antisocial , mother is gone and dad is there but I felt like he was doing something wrong or wasn’t giving her Enough attention. She meets a girl named Justine the so called “ girl with the torn skirt “ she looks for her etc etc. and runs away from home … not going to spoil much . The ending was okay I believe one of the main reasons I didn’t give it 5 starts was due to the length and the ending . I loved the main character and how depressing and realistic the book was .

9.Ariel -Sylvia Plath 4/5

I was originally going to give this 5 stars as well … but there’s always something that disappoints me in Sylvia Plaths writing , and it’s the racism. Please don’t get me wrong I’m a big fan of her work but I do feel the need to critique it . I wish the racists remarks weren’t there , since it’s such a waste because her work is always one of my favorites, even her being one of my favorite poets . Lady Lazarus and the applicant were my personal favorites.

I can’t add more pics but …

10. Midnight sun - Stephanie Meyer ( 5 book from the twilight series ) 2/5

Well this whole book was a disappointment, it was great to read the story from Edwards pov … but a waste of time imo. Half of the book was just Edward trying to resist Bella’s scent and deciding if he should kill her or not , watching her sleep etc … I’m a fan of twilight but I’m not sure if I’m a fan of this one .

11. Birthday girl - Penelope Douglas 4/5

As y’all know I love Penelope this is my second book by them ( I really can’t wait to read more of their books ) I’m just saying I loved Jordan and loved her character development . Hated cole at the beginning but he also had character development . Pike Lawson dilf loml marry me . The smut was good but not as amazing as in punk 57 . I just gotta say if y’all live older men or have daddy issues read this book lol .

12.Dracula - bram stocker- no rating yet

I haven’t finished this yet but I’m almost there … I’m loving this book so far I love the horror and the vibes .. can’t wait to read more horror books in October.

September was a weird month for books it was great I think overall …

[random-jot]

Books That Made Me

Tagged by @books-and-doodles to talk about some of the books that have impacted me most. Thank u for the tag!! This is a v cool tag - though it may take me some time to properly think about it

I've not put these in any particular order, just the order I think of them; I'm including some general favourites, some teen/childhood faves and maybe even some books that impacted me bc of how much I didn't like them - this should be fun, let's go!

1. The Lord Of The Rings - J.R.R. Tolkien

Fantasy fan includes LOTR on their list? Who saw that coming? ;D In seriousness tho; I grew up watching the LOTR movies as a kid, so the story'll always hold a special place in my heart for that alone, revisting the books OR movies always feels like coming home. ALSO: I distinctly remember finishing reading the books for the first time, sitting in the school library, closing the final page of ROTK and thinking "I want to be a writer. I want to write something like that one day." So not only is this a franchise that I loved when I was younger, it is also the reason that I decided I wanted to be a writer in the first place, so in terms of 'books that made me' this one quite unequivocally fits the bill. This book literally made me want to be a writer.

2. The Silmarillion/Tolkien's Legendarium

What you didn't think I was done talking Tolkien did you? After I'd read LOTR I wanted to read more Tolkien and ofc the Silmarillion was on offer - I'd be lying if I said I didn't have a few false starts on it, bc man that boi is d e n s e. However, after reading Silm for the first time I was blown away by it; the complexity of the lore and worldbuilding, the deepness and richness of the history to a world that I thought I loved before. These days, I've read Silm more times than LOTR (and maybe even - as a book - prefer it?) The stories of Beren and Lúthien, The Children Of Húrin, the rise and fall of Fëanor, the great war against the original dark lord Morgoth, the origin of the world itself, all of it together just stuck with me, it was just so beautifully intricate and so goddamned interesting to learn more about Beleriand and Middle Earth and Tolkien's world. Except for that geography chapter. That's one I admit I tend to skip on rereads.

(Just gonna pop a readmore here, as this inevitably ended up being quite long :D)

3. Alex Rider - Anthony Horowitz

Before year 7 began, we were assigned a list of books by our school and had to choose one to read and do a report on. Me and pretty much every other boy I knew chose Alex Rider: Stormbreaker by Anthony Horowitz. Teenage spy & cool gadgets? What's not to like (other than the terrible movie adaptation). From there I was hooked on this series and desparate to read the other five books that were out (at the time). I remember the excitement when Snakehead, Crocodile Tears & Scorpia Rising were respectively announced, not to mention Russian Roulette? Never Say Die too, though by the time that came out I'd outgrown this series a little. Still, that doesn't take away from how big a fan i was, how much time i spent consuming this series (and coming up w/ my own story ideas for it, which I used to do a lot for things I liked). My love of this series is also partially what made me go see Kingsman: The Secret Service when it came out, which is one of my favourite movies, so i owe AR for that one. I'll always feel that nostalgic attachment for this series, and I'd definitely love to catch up with where the story is now at some point.

4. Goosebumps - R.L. Stine

The series that DOMINATED an entire row of my childhood bookshelf. Vividly remember trying to squeeze any new one I got onto that same shelf so they could all be together. Being honest Goosbumps books were always 50/50 in whether they were good or not, but there were some titles in that series that really did stick with me, either for the cool imagery/monsters or some genuinely scary sequences. How To Kill A Monster gave me nightmares and I adored The Abominable Snowman of Pasadena. Finding one i hadn't got already at a Scholastic book fair or at the school library was always such a thrilling moment.

5. Animorphs - K.A. Applegate

Well, I couldn't mention Goosebumps and not mention the other side of the same coin, could I now? I was never as big an Animorphs fan as I was goosebumps - in fact the reason I first got into it is bc there weren't any Goosebumps left in the kid's section one day at oxfam after school - but I still really enjoyed the books I did read. How often did I fantasise about being able to turn into a tiger or something because of these books? I only ever read about 5 or 6 of them, but it was fun to get a different perspective in each one & go on these mini-adventures, plus the concept behind the Yerks was just so terrifying as a child. No one to trust! I doubt I'll ever read every book, but I'd love it if netflix or someone did a Stranger Things-esque modern adaptation of it.

6. The Beano

While we're talking about childhood nostalgia, I gotta bring the Beano up. I happen to be a Gold Member of the Beano Club and you bet I've still got the card to prove it! I loved getting these delivered every week, seeing what Dennis, or Minnie, or Roger were getting up to. Though I was originally a staunch Dennis The Menace fan, Roger the Dodger soon became my fav. Always loved it when they did a crossover too, and soon enough I had a gigantic collection of Beano Annuals, both new and old dating back to the 60s. The word 'obsessed' gets bandied around a fair bit these days, but I don't think I'm being hyperbolic when I say I was obsessed with The Beano. I even had Dennis The Menace bubble bath at one point.

7. The Amazing Spider-Man - Stan Lee & Steve Ditko/John Romita

So I grew up with the Toeby/Raimi movies & loved them, plus just loved Spider-Man as a character. I've consumed a lot of SM related content over the years but I was genuinely surprised by how much I connected with the original comic run - a few years ago I got some TASM omnibus books, collecting the original issues & fan-letters which was super-cool to read just to see the original context of the character and how he grew from an obscure one-off to one of the most beloved comic-book characters today. My granny was going through a rough time around then, so I really connected with Peter's devotion to looking after his Aunt May. Sure, there were cheesy moments and some certain outdated things, but it was still really cool. I already knew I loved Spider-Man generally, but reading those Omni-Busses really cemented Peter Parker as one of my favourite fictional characters of all time.

8. Green Lanterns - Sam Humphries

Let's stick on the comic front for a moment. Green Lanterns is a comic run from a few years back, following two new Earth Green Lanterns who get chosen at the same time - Simon Baz and Jessica Cruz. They start as rivals but develop a really fun and close friendship as they have to work together.

However, what really cements this run in my heart is Jessica's character specifically - she may be a Green Lantern but she also suffers from extreme anxiety and the series doesn't shy away from the realities of what living with anxiety can be like. Especially as i was going through my own struggles with anxiety/depression at the time, I connected hard with that aspect of it. Plus, Sam Humphries, the writer, also suffers from anxiety, so knows how to depict it. It spoke to me on such a fundamental level and I love the reoccurring theme with Jess's character - that being a GL isn't about having no fear, but having the ability to overcome great fear - and she does that every morning convincing herself to get out of bed and go out into the world. That was something that really resonated with me.

Also the story itself is really cool, well-told and enjoyable to read. It's one of the only modern comic runs that I've bought every volume for, I was that invested.

7. The Cursed Child

This makes the list, not because I loved it, but because I FUCKING HATED IT. Since I've already mentioned I grew up with the LOTR movies and the Raimi Spider-Man trig, you can probably gather I also grew up with Harry Potter. I'm not as big on HP now as I once was, for a variety of reasons, but I still grew up with it and liked it a lot. I remember being excited for Cursed Child when it was announced. I remember getting the script-book for a decent price. I remember reading the first 20 pages or so, thinking 'okay... this isn't exactly what I was expecting.' And once the Candy-Lady started throwing muffin hand-grenades, that was probably when this turned into a hate-read for me. It wasn't all bad - some of it was just odd. But it felt like such a let-down, rehashing ideas from the original HP stories instead of being it's own thing, completely ignoring established traits of characters & established rules of the universe and also did I mention being fucking terrible. I was studying story-structure & story telling as part of my uni degree when I read this and let me tell you I was seething by the time I finished because of how bad the story was. Thinking back on it now still fills me with a potent rage. It is genuinely one of the worst books I've ever read. And I know people say 'oh it's better when you see on stage with the effects and everything' but that doesn't stop the base story from being absolute trash. I could go on and on about how much I hated this, but for now I'll say this is a book that made me - made me realise how much I could hate something.

8. A Song Of Ice And Fire - George R.R. Martin

OK let's get more positive. (Yes the show ended badly, good that obligatory disclaimer's out of the way, let's talk about the books now.) ASOIAF makes the list because it's the series that got me back into reading. I read a lot as a child and I read a lot now, but in my early teens I fell out of love with it. However, when Game of Thrones really began to become popular, I realised all my friends were reading the books of the series - and I was behind them. Not only was I motivated to read fast and try catch up, even overtake my friends where they were in the series, this series also showed me what modern fantasy could be. The grounded dangerous world made the stakes feel high, and it can't be denied that GRRM's character work is astounding, plus his intricate plotting in regards to all the intrigue and conspiracies and moving pieces that this series has to juggle is absolutely phenomenal. Juggling multiple characters and storylines across such a large world-map is damn difficult and even if we never do see TWOW, I still commend him for what he's managed to do so far. Not to mention, after I finished Dance With Dragons, I was so consumed by the series that nothing could feel the hole left by not having it to read anymore; it led me to spend two years devouring every fan-theory, sub-reddit, prediction I could find, just for a little taste of ASOIAF. Sure, the show left a sour taste and the wait for TWOW has dampened my level of investment in this series somewhat, but that doesn't take away from the effect it had on me at the time.

9. The First Law - Joe Abercrombie

So what I was saying up there about ASOIAF - How it was a series I was so invested in that when I finished, it was hard to find anything to fill that void? Well, in uni I read The First Law trilogy. Now that was a series I got invested in. I thought ASOIAF's characterisation was good? First Law is on another level. The Blade Itself was somewhat of a slowburn - I enjoyed the characters but did often find myself thinking 'ok but when are our main povs gonna meet? where's this going?' Before They Are Hanged I enjoyed more as it had a more traditional fantasy vibe - ragtag group on a quest, conspiracy in a city, war between armies and such. And then Last Argument of Kings... that book blew my damn mind. The complex characters and their grey morality, the dry humour of it all, the plot twists! The way Abercrombie was able to subvert certain fantasy tropes will still honouring other ones. There was legitimately a moment in Last Arg where I had to put the book down, I was so stunned by one of the big twists. After Last Arg I was pretty sure The First Law was my new favourite book series and reading the Great Leveller trilogy confirmed it. Sharp Ends and the current Age Of Madness books have continued being top quality. First Law has the top spot on my list of faves and it would take a very strong contender indeed to knock it off that throne.

10. The Gentleman Bastard Sequence - Scott Lynch

The Gentleman Bastard Sequence was a very strong contender indeed to knock First Law off that throne. First Law still has it's crown, but I will say I only began GBS this year and it's already cemented in my top ten, possible even as high as second place next to TFL. The Lies Of Locke Lamora was something I read just bc some friends had recc'd it, it was relatively small, and I wanted a book I could read in a week long holiday. I thought I might like it. Imagine my surprise when I absolutely loved it. TLOLL contained one of the most heartbreaking and shocking moments that I've read in fantasy and - devestating as it was - I think it was such a bold choice that that's why I liked it so much. The banter & friendship between the characters, especially Locke and Jean, the way all the flashbacks culminate by the end and you realise why we had them, the physical design of the world these books take place in. It was an excellent read. I liked Red Seas Under Red Skies just as much, if not more than TLOLL and I had so much fun with Republic Of Thieves.

11. The Waking Land Trilogy - Callie Bates

This is a series I finished this year and really loved, especially the 2nd book, The Memory Of Fire, and I want to shout it out because it's not that well known and I say it should be! Each book follows the perspective of a different character in the story - Elanna, Jahan, and Sophy, respectively. Each of them has a really cool backstory & personality, the romance between Elanna & Jahan is so sweet, and like Gentleman Bastards, one of my favourite characters - Rhia - has a caffeine addiction. The magic system in these books is unabshedly magical and very cool, but what really makes these books stand out is that they are written entirely in first-person present-tense. The sense that the things that are happening to these characters are happening Right Now is very engaging, especially in tense or action scenes. It's a very cool series with fun characters & magic and a really good story at it's heart. I highly recommend it to anyone who hasn't heard of this one.

12. The Farseer Trilogy - Robin Hobb

Again, one I only read this year, but still was absolutely gripped by. Regal's villain monologue from the end of Assassin's Apprentice blew me away - now that's how you write a villain speech! Plus the exploration of how scary telepathy can be, the character of Fitz and his friends, his relationships with The Fool, and Burrich, and Verity and Nighteyes; all good stuff. It's easy to see why this is considered a classic.

13. The Kingkiller Chronicle - Patrick Rothfuss

This series was a big highlight from last year. The Name of the Wind was an incredible read, I loved getting to know Kvothe's character, loved the intricacy of the magic system and all of the segments that take place at the University. I do agree with the majority that The Wise Man's Fear meandered a little too much, but it did contain some fantastic sequences - the early continuation of Kvothe and Ambrose's rivalries, and the fight in the forest were particular highlights. Also The Slow Regard Of Silent Things was a beautifully written book and a really cool insight into the mind of Auri and how she works as a character. I'll reserve full judgement of the series for when (if) The Doors Of Stone comes out, but so far it's been a very enjoyable series to read.

14. Mistborn: The Final Empire - Brandon Sanderson

I just recently read the first Mistborn book and loved it. Getting through a 700+ page book in less than a week is way faster than I normally read, so that should tell you that I got pretty damn invested in what was going on. Kelsier and Vin were fantastic characters & I loved everyone in the heist crew. More than that - so a few years ago I tried out Stormlight Archive and had a very tough time getting into it, which led me to just kind of write-off Sanderson for a while - however, reading Mistborn and liking it so much has renewed my faith in him and made me really want to have another proper go at Stormlight again. And, of course, I can't wait to finish the rest of Mistborn Era One.

15. Captain Underpants - Dav Pilkey

Let's end with a curveball, shall we? So, I read these books as a kid and loved them - they were funny, campy, goofy and just a good time. I was always jealous of George and Harold being best friends who lived next door to each other! However, what really gets them their place on this list is the fact that George and Harold put together their own comic books and sold them on the school playground. Being the impressionable sponge of a child I was, this inspired me to start making my own comic books when I was in Primary School, coming up with my own characters and stories, drawning them out and stapling the pages together, ink on my hands. If I'd never read these, I might never have made my characters 'Remo' or 'Pluto Penguin.' I might never had rediscovered those characters and modernised them into the OCs that they are today. I've released five of my own comic books online so far (shameless plug) and I'm currently writing some short stories to explore them/the world more, and the fact that the protaganists of Captain Underpants (of all things) were themselves comic creators, played no small part int he inception of that part of my life. So that's why Captain Underpants series makes it onto the 'books that made me' list.

——————————————————————————————————————

Okay, that's my list of books that made me I guess. I'm sure there's something I've forgotten lol, but I had fun thinking up these and writing them!

Oh goodness, I really don't know who to tag in this, so I'll just say that If you see this & want to do it you can absolutely consider yourself tagged by me. Even you. Yes, you!

[theaufanartist]

“𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘺 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳.”

Kang Yeo Sang💝

Part 3-Part 4

The following days, Yeo Sang and you talked a lot, each with the motive to try and understand the other, but surprisingly growing closer to each other. You slowly got to know that he loved eating chicken, he loved books since it was already evident from the fact that he was the president of the book club, and he loved RnB.

For Yeo Sang, it wasn’t really much of a surprise how much you loved fantasy novels, since there was always a new dystopian book in your hand every week. He came to know that you loved fettuccine pasta more than spaghetti, how you scrunch up your nose when you’re cringed about something, and there are two scrunch lines on either side of your nose, between your eyebrows. He loved every detail about you, but what was it that was drawing you both closer to each other? It seemed like you both already knew so much about each other.

“Hey,”you sit next to Yeo Sang in the library, a brown book in your hand. He smiles at you, but raises an eyebrow once he sees what’s in your hand.

“Rebirth?”

“Yeah, I found this book. It’s about a King of Yeonsu-dong, who falls in love with his Commander in Chief, but they sadly pass away while saving the king,”you say, flipping through the pages, pouting. He smiles at you, because he knew how much you hated it when one of the lovers passed away.

“You can take a break from the science fiction you read,”you say, giggling at him. He smirks at you. You slide the book towards him, making him stare at it.

“Read it,”you say, before pinching his cheek, making him glare at you playfully, “I gotta go to class. See you later, sweet cheeks,”you say, winking at him. He smirks at you and waves you off.

“Rebirth huh,”he mumbles, fingers grazing over the title of the book etched on the cover. He shrugs his shoulders. Taking the book, he leaves the library.

After walking you to your house, he stops by the butterfly park, as you named it, and stays there. He watches the sun set slowly, the sky turning from yellow to orange to red to purple. He smiles thinking about you, and gets up to go home.

Once he opens the door to his bedroom, he reaches for the book you gave him.

“Let’s see what it got.”

After a while of reading, he feels those battle scenes all too familiar.

The mentions of blue monarch butterflies throws him off guard, too. He remembers you spacing out and later tell him how you felt that every moment with him felt familiar. As he skims through the words on the page, he comes across a certain paragraph, where it all becomes crystal clear.

“𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘒𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘢 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘦, 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘣𝘶𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘴. 𝘏𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘯 𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘦𝘧 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴, 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘬 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘠𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘶-𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘨, 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘯𝘵. 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘦. 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘴𝘢𝘪𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘒𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘴 𝘣𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘯 𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘦𝘧, 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘦. 𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘢𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩.”

“Huh, this is interesting,”he mumbles, “very interesting.”

His mind wanders back to the park. When he told his mother about it, she never believed it, thinking he read about it somewhere, neither did your parents, as you narrated their reactions to him. He pondered a lot, till he searched up everything online. Shock was an understatement, when his name popped up in the last ruler of Yeonsu-dong, an illustration that resembled him so much along with another woman, he presumed was the king’s wife, along with a girl on his lap. What shocked him was there was an illustration of you dressed in a war armour, standing next to the King and an old man, which he assumed was the father of the King. The illustration was so eerily alike to yours. That night, he stayed up late, till he didn’t finish searching up everything.

The book helped him link dots to his true self. He kept searching till he found the thesis papers online, who searched up on the said King. Some of them couldn’t yet find the remains of the King and the Commander, but he knew where they were. He picked up his phone, and dialled the number of that one person he knew would definitely help him.

“Yeo, it’s 3 am for fuck sake, I swear to God if you-“

“I’ve got something to tell you. Bring a helping hand and shovels,”he says, before he cuts the call.

After few minutes, he finds a car in the drive way of his house, a hand waving at him.

“Thanks Woo,”Yeo Sang says, opening the door of his car.

“What the hell did you want a shovel for? Did you kill someone?”

“What, no! Okay, this might seem really weird, but I think I’ve got answers to those weird dreams I’ve been getting,”he mumbles, making Woo sigh.

“Were you the King or something?”San jokes from the backseat, making Woo giggle. When Yeo Sang doesn’t respond, both of their laughters die out.

“Don’t tell me,”San mumbles, making Yeo sigh.

“Yes,”he whispers loud enough for them to hear.

“Wow,”Woo Young sighs, “where do we need to go with San and these shovels?”he asks, pointing at San with his thumb and the weapons near him.

“I’ll drive,”Yeo Sang suggests, making Woo Young nod at his suggestion.

After a drive of 10 minutes, they reach their destination. Yeo Sang opens the rusty gates, a creaking sound resonating, making Woo Young and San cover their ears.

When they enter the garden, their eyes widen in disbelief. San pushes Woo Young aside, gawking at the butterflies which were flying around.

“This place,”he says, walking on the soft grass, “this is the garden of King-“

He looks at Yeo Sang, who was just staring at him.

“How did you find it?”

“I used to come here as a kid,”he begins, reminiscing his childhood discovery place, which turned it into his comfort place.

“Do they-“

“Yep.”

The three of them stand still, the birds chirping in the background.

“Why did you ask for shovels?”Woo Young questions him.

“Do you think the King is buried here?”San asks, making Yeo Sang nod at him.

“This is the place that was mentioned in the thesis papers, online,”he states, walking over to Woo, “I think their bodies should be buried somewhere here.”

“We thought that this place was a myth,”San mumbles, hand brushing over the grass, “I think you finding this place out confirms it all.”

“That he is the King we talked about?”Woo Young asks, making San nod.

“You’re King Yeo Sang, the last King of the Kang Dynasty, buried next to the Commander in Chief, as per his request,”San whispers.

“So, the dreams you were seeing were everything that happened to you in the past?”Woo Young asks, making Yeo Sang nod.

“And the surprising thing is, they saw some of those dreams too, that kind of acted as a link to mine,”he says, making their eyes widen in surprise.

“You should tell this to them,”San suggests, placing a hand on Yeo Sang’s shoulder, “they deserve to know this, too.”

“He’s right Yeo,”Woo chimes in, hugging Yeo Sang, “we’re there for you. It’s good that you’ve at least got it all out.”

“Yeah, I just need to tell this to them,”he says, the three of them now sitting with their legs spread, seeing the sun rise, dawning upon them the revelation of the past.

While walking back to the car, San stops midway, making the other two turn back.

“No wonder my cat seems to like you,”he says, making Yeo Sang raise his eyebrow.

“What do you mean?”

“Her name is Byeol,”he says, “she was named after one of our ancestors, the King’s sister, Kang Byeol.”

“You seriously want to believe the fact that just because she’s named Byeol, she would be the King’s sister?”Woo Young asks, a comical look on his face.

“Can be true tho,”San mutters, making both of them chuckle at him.

______________________________________________________________________

“Hey,”you greet the trio, who were smiling at you.

“Hey you,”Yeo Sang greets, hugging you. This was surprising, because you’re always the first one to initiate contact.

“You seem to be in a good mood,”you say, making the other two grin at you. Yeo Sang breaks the hug, smiling.

“The three of you’re scaring me with your grins,”you laugh nervously.

“Meet me at our spot after school,”Yeo Sang whispers, “I’ve got answers.”

Your eyes widen in surprise, nodding at him. He smiles and pecks your forehead.

“See you, sweet cheeks,”he says, smiling at your shocked face. Woo Young and San giggle at the scene, leaving you a blushing mess.

“What the hell just happened?”you whisper to yourself.

______________________________________________________________________

You reach your spot before he does. The butterflies were flying as usual. You smile at them, making way to sit on the ground. There were so many flowers around you, it made you feel that you belonged there. But your thoughts slowly drift back to what Yeo Sang said.

“𝘐’𝘷𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘴.”

What did he mean by that?

While you were lost in your own thoughts, you failed to hear the soft footsteps on the grass of a certain someone who had your heart racing ever since you saw him.

“Hey,”he says, deep voice rumbling in his chest, making you putty in your place.

“Hey,”you say, smiling at him, “you wanted to talk?”

“Yeah,”he replies. Taking the book you gave him out of his backpack along with a few more papers and what looked like a notebook filled with notes, he places it in your lap. You look at it quizzically.

“I did some research last night,”he mumbles. You look through the papers in your lap, squinting at the one particular illustration that caught your sight.

“Is that-”

“Yeah,”he says, now turning his body to look at you.

“Does that mean-”

“Yes.”

You turn to look at him. You take out the sketch of the person from your dreams, and try syncing it with one of the illustrations on the papers Yeo Sang gave. You gasp aloud, eyes widening in disbelief when the facial structure matches to the King’s. Your eyes start watering unintentionally. You trace the features of the King, and look at Yeo Sang, whose eyes were mirroring your action.

“Are we really?”your voice breaks, making Yeo Sang nod at you. You cry silently. Yeo Sang pulls you towards him such that you’re straddling him. You cry in his chest, hugging him tightly. He cries silently, hands brushing through your hair, calming you.

You move away from his chest, his face saddening due to sudden loss of touch. You wipe your eyes with your sweater paws, sniffling. He tips your chin to look into your eyes. Saying nothing you both lean in, lips touching, fitting the last piece of the puzzle of your lives. You cry into the kiss, hands behind his head, as he mirrors your actions. The kiss was nothing compared to any you ever had. This one had an intense feeling of longing, happiness and 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦.

You both break the kiss, panting to catch your breath. He leans in to touch your forehead, thumb swiping your bottom lip, then caressing your cheeks.

“Yeo,”you mumble.

“Shh,”he whispers, “I know.”

“What now?” You ask, as you raise your head to look at him, who’s already looking at you.

“I don’t know,”he says, “all I know is 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘺 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳.”

“So,”you begin, “let’s be that way.”

He smiles at you, catching your lips with his, kissing you like his life depended on it. You broke the kiss and smiled, placing a small kiss on his cheek, and threw your arms around his neck, making him snake his arms round your waist, hugging you like you would disappear any moment.

“I’m never letting you go,”he mumbles in your hair, taking in the sweet scent of vanilla musk and coconut. You nuzzle your head in his neck and shoulder juncture, placing a kiss there.

“I’m never leaving you again,”you say, both lost in the presence after nearly 40 decades of their lost love.

[nanasarea]

Park Jisung as your idol bf

Genre: fluff

Pairing: jisung x idol!reader

Requested

Word count:1757 (dear lord, the longest in the idol bf series damn...) 

a/n: this is more of a jisung as your bf in general, not so much the idol aspect sorry. Also yes, i ended up writing about jisung having a baby, sue me, I’m in jisung hours now! also do i even need to say it’s not proofread at this point?

Haechan /  Yuta / Mark / Jeno / Jaemin / Chenle / Renjun / Jaehyun

you were in the same dance class when you were younger

so you were friends way before either of your debuts

like when you knew each other when he was an smrookie

and of course, both of you being talented dancers

you were both training under companies at a rather young age

and it isn’t easy being a trainee regardless of your age

but because you were both still in school

and so young

you knew you should stick together

let’s say you had chemistry homework

but you also had vocal lessons

i’m not saying he would help you

because he wouldn’t

but he would be there to motivate you 

and study his own school work 

so you weren’t alone

it’s safe to say you were each other’s motivation when it came to school

he would also insist on his mom picking you up from school and driving you to the company when your mom couldn’t

same would go reversed

not that either of your moms minded

they found it adorable

and they shipped you both anyway so

that means him and his family coming over for dinner 

and you and yours going to theirs for dinner

and your moms would document all of your childhood memories

they would bond over it

since you didn’t have time to make any friends in school, 

you both valued your friendship a lot

he ended up debuting before you

and you teased him a lot

until he “taught” you how to ride a hoverboard

and you ended up falling in the first 4 seconds

then he would tease you

and you’d now understand how hard his dances really were

you met most of his members when they were smrookies

but you didn’t know renjun and chenle that well

so whenever you could, 

you would hang out with each other

and become very close

which is why they were all so supportive when you ran into their dorms and yelled that you were debuting 

you end up having a little celebration

when you actually did debut, 

they were so hyped

especially jisung

he streamed your mv so many times

he knew every detail of every scene in the mv

which was adorable

the fans knew you were childhood friends so they absolutely loved your interactions

which meant your company/companies being like 

WE COULD MAKE MONEY FROM THAT

so they make sure you have a collab stage 

like really early in your debut

and it was kinda awkward

but because you knew each other beforehand

you felt completely fine

at this point, your moms were betting on when you’d start dating

to which you would both just blush and tell them to stop

you end up going on so many variety shows together

mainly dance specials

and everyone finds you too adorable

like everyone ships it

but they’re kinda lowkey about it because they don’t want to make you uncomfortable 

not the case of his members tho

or yours

you can’t tell me jaemin’s hiatus wasn’t just him laying in bed, resting and planning your wedding

you can’t

taeyong ends up asking him why he hasn’t asked you out yet

he just blushes

it wasn’t until you were both a bit older

and you were at an award ceremony

where everyone was complimenting you

like your dress, makeup, hair, etc

that he realized he liked you

seeing you like that and realizing he needs to stop looking at you as his little childhood friend

and start looking at you as an adult

or somewhat of an adult

he can never look at you as an adult

because he would always have the image of you

with 6 empty chocolate milks around you

and a gummy worm hanging from your mouth

as you tried your best to color the coloring book correctly

but hey, you were always going to have the imagine of him

hanging from monkey bars

after he finished his 5th scoop of ice cream 

and laughing because he overheard someone say a fart joke

ANYWAY

he starts seeing you as an adult

kinda

and he gets slightly jealous when everyone compliments you

so after that, he goes to taeyong and jaehyun

and asks for dating advice

jaehyun just yells 

“wooooo! you should know my usual boba order by now, right, lee?”

These fuckers bet on how long it would take for jisung to realize his feelings 

and jaehyun would regrets only asking for a free boba when he won

but he’s way too happy about winning to care

it ends with half of 127 and half of dreamies giving advice, 

the other halves teasing

and wayv cooing on the phone as they were in china at the time

it takes him like 5 months till he confesses

he’s a nervous baby let him be

and when he does get the courage, 

he takes you to an amusement park

you don’t go on any of the rides

because he’s scared

but you do play the games and eat food

you even watch the fireworks

which is when he finally holds your hand for the first time

you did a lot of skinship before

like when you were friends

but it wasn’t like this 

it was cute

he was so nervous

your palms were both sweaty from nervousness

but neither of you cared

you were just happy to enjoy the moment

 that got cheesy

he even walked you to your dorm 

like to right in front of your door

which is when he hesitantly gave you a kiss on the cheek 

but you wanted a real kiss so you gave him a proper kiss

and he ended up almost tripping on his way to the elevator

where he smiled to himself

and tried to calm himself down

so the members wouldn’t see him like this

but they did

they teased him

and just yelled with him

“our baby had his first kiss!” -jaemin

“life is going way too fast! weren’t you like 3 years old yesterday?!”- jeno

“how come he’s 2 years younger and already getting more action than me?!” -renjun

the others find out 

and tease him

mostly they just congratulate him tho

“wooo! our baby is becoming a man!” -taeyong

“doyoung, hold me, i’m emotional!” -johnny 

“when’s the wedding?” -taeil

“wedding? i always cry at weddings...” -jungwoo

“no weddings! yet!” -kun

“yeah! he’s not getting married before me!” -jaehyun

they might have gone a bit overboard

but can you blame them 

it’s their baby we’re talking abt

they still see him as the little toddler from when he was on mickey mouse club

also you end up not telling your parents right away

and they keep match making

so you end up being like

“Mom, we’re already dating, you can stop”

cue both of your moms get excited

like they’re already talking about being the best grandmas

and having the cutest grandchildren

even tho you’ve only been together for 2 months

something tells me he’d be the type to want to have matching everything

phone cases

(probably anna and kristoff ones)

then profile pictures

jewelry

clothing

anything and everything

he’d find it so cute

speaking of matching profile pics

the fans would realize what was going on 

when you would match your pfps

so your company/companies were like

yes, they’re dating, no one is surprised...anyway 127 comeback 

your dating announcement is like super chill

mainly because everyone was waiting for it 

also i feel like he’d always be playing with your hair 

and fixing it

like all the time

a single hair out of place?

we can’t have that!

his hands are in your hair already

would text you for advice while filming chenji’s this and that

and would always make something for you too

“chenle’s turned out more aesthetic but mine is made with love, so mine is better my default.” 

also it wouldn’t matter if you’re older than him, the same age, younger than him

doesn’t matter

would want to hear you call him oppa

but immediately get shy after

also he’s an aquarius

so if you end up getting really random texts during the day

like during your schedules

don’t be surprised

like he’s already maknae on top

so he will rebel to like some of the things you say

“jisung! we need to get back to filming in 3 minutes!”

“but weeee!” -jisung going down the slide for the 5th time 

cries when you joke about leaving him there

speaking of crying, 

we all know he’s emotional

and cries easily

so he just runs to you whenever he wants to cry

and just placed his head on your shoulder

to hide his facial expression

but it’s okay

you’ve already seen everything from the random snaps you get every day

he might not know how to comfort you at first

but he will learn

and he’s pretty mature for his age 

so he would take comforting you very seriously

he’s a really good listener 

so he would love to just hear you vent to him

it would kinda boost his ego a bit too

like he’s the one who you’re venting to

yknow what i mean?

but also he protects you very well

you get scared of a spider 

he goes all manly mode 

and gets rid of it for you

doesn’t like to admit it, 

but he thinks about you a lot

and your future

like once you two grow out of your idol lives 

and into a more adult life

where you get married

and have kids

kids who tease their uncles (aka nct members)

because THE maknae on top was their teacher after all

speaking of weddings

his older brother got married

and obviously you were his date

and everyone kept looking at you two

asking when it was your turn

your mom said “hopefully soon”

“mom, we don’t have time, we have busy schedules”

“but one day...”

time jump to when the news breaks about your engagement 

and everyone is crying

they watched you both grow up and now you’re getting married??

what???

the announcement was everywhere

also you don’t announce anything about a child

one day, you just both post a picture of your daughter

with a caption like

“she’s so cute, i knew my genes were good.”

or something like that

and everyone goes wild

nation’s babies having a baby?

legend says chenle’s screaming caused 2 earthquakes that day

to sum it up: nation’s babies turned nation’s it couple because jisung is the best boyfriend you could ever have asked for 

.....i might have gone way more invested than i thought i was going to. Do i regret it tho? hell no. Am i emotional now because I pictured adult Jisung with a baby? hell yes.

tag list: @soleilchannie​

[scatterpatter]

Corren - 1 through 100 - You did this to yourself.

FUCK YOU *UN-IRONICS YOUR ASK*

UNDER THE FUCKING CUT

1. What do they smell like?

Bad. Do you think their party is able to regularly take showers? I thinketh the fuck not. ... Pine and old books when he can self care tho.

2. What is their voice like?

Listen I know Corren, being taller, would be more likely to have a deeper register but you'll tear "tenor Corren" out of my cold dead hands

3. What is their biggest motivator?

Spite.

4. What is their most embarrassing memory?

When he first met his BFF Alondra, he was so antisocial and good at ignoring people that she actually got the impression he might have been hard of hearing. She never let him live that down. (one day I'll finish this fic i promise)

5. How do they deal with/react to pain?

"I will keep all of my pain in here, and one day I'll die." ... Okay but listen he's squishy so he takes like one hit and is bloodied up. Someone get him a healer. Pls.

6. What do they like to wear?

He likes his cloak. Its weighty and soft(well. WAS soft. got a bit of wear and tear these days.) and like. Who doesnt love cloaks.

7. Which of their relationships have impacted them most positively?

Ohhhhh fuuuccck this one's tough. I might have to go with Torvid honestly. While the entire party has had a positive impact on him(and trust me I was this close to picking Alistair), Torvid's been more of the one to call him out on his bullshit and to, oh I don't know, talk about your emotions? Ever??? Yknow BEFORE they become too much to handle and he absolutely breaks down???

8. What’s the weirdest thing they’ve ever eaten?

Alistair's cooking.

9. Describe the way that they sleep.

Good luck finding him NOT cuddled up with at least one dog. Tbh he just enjoys cuddles in general.

10. What is their favorite food/kind of food?

FUCKIN. GIVE HIM A GOOD STEAK. THIS BOY IS MOSTLY CARNIVORISTIC.

11. What do they feel most insecure about?

As tempted as I am to say "His cooking", it's actually his singing.

12. How do they like to dress?

"Comfort over flashiness tbh. I gotta go ADVENTURING in whatever I wear after all."

"... Also don't you DARE perceive me as cishet."

13. How do they react to feelings of guilt?

Call him a genie because he will BOTTLE THAT SHIT UP.

14. How do they react to/deal with betrayal?

Denial :D

15. What is their greatest achievement?

Shrike: Killing his dad

Me: NOOOOOO

EDIT: WAIT THIS WAS ANSWERED IN Q99 WHAT THE HECK

16. What are they like when they’ve gotten too little sleep?

Somehow more of a dick than usual. Snappy and cranky and just. Mrehhh.

17. What are they like when they’re drunk?

Doesn't get drunk often, but when he does I imagine he's actually giggly and a little clingy. It's cute :)

18. What kind of music do they enjoy?

*Opens my Corren playlist* Oh yeah. It's either full edgy alt rock or indie alt "depressed millenial" tracks.

19. Are they right or left handed?

FFFuuhhhhck uhhhh well

Looking over my old art I can't seem to pick a dominant hand(I've even drawn him handling his sniper with either hand???????????) so like oops guess he's ambidextrous.

20. Fears?

The dark, the ocean, dying alone and forgotten, his friends losing their trust of him

21. Favorite kind of weather?

Rain!!!! Especially cool rain like what people often get in fall months.

22. Favorite color?

Indigo!!!

23. Do they collect anything?

Books :3

24. Do they prefer either hot or cold weather more?

Cold weather by far.

25. What is their eye color?

Electric blue!

26. What is their race/ethnicity?

Well his race is a homebrew race known as Marelienth. Uhhh ethnicity? Idk he's from a mountain town way up north *shrugs*

In human aus I imagine him as half-Mongolian half-Norwegian so ayee

27. Hair color?

Black!

28. Are they happy where they are currently?

No :D He loves adventuring with his party don't get me wrong but he still has a lot of trauma to unpack. ... Also he was just possibly broken up with soooo. :/

29. Are they a morning person?

NOPE.

30. Sunrise or sunset?

*motions to above question* Sunset.

31. Are they more messy or more organized?

More organized, actually!

32. Pet peeves?

*unravels a list. It's all shit the party has done. Mostly Alistair.*

33. Do they own any objects of significant personal importance?

HOOUSIDSJFK- HE- Y-YEAH HE SURE DOES

His amethyst pendant used to belong to his brother, Julian, and he gave it to Corren right before they were separated so you BET it's sentimental as shit and he wears it daily.

34. Least favorite food?

Mecha's usually a great cook but one time trolled him with some absurdly spicy curry he couldn't handle and he's never forgiven them.

35. Least favorite color?

Hmmm. Maybe... yellow?

36. Least favorite smell?

He spent a year with his party in a damp cave and no showers, so uh. I'll give you a guess.

37. When was the last time they cried?

Literally last night in our game's timeline :D Full breakdown and everything!

38. Were they with anybody the last time they cried?

Torvid :D He was there to comfort

39. Tell us about one of the times they got injured?

One time they were in combat and Corren took a few hits and was down to about 2hp or so. He had a temporary level thanks to Kieran, which boosted his HP a little bit. When he teleported them to a safe town, though, well... Torvid was waiting for them so that's cool. But uh. Yeah that temporary level wore off then and there, dropping Corn Cob to exactly 0hp and he just- flopped down face first in the snow and started dying then and there KJNDKLFNSLKN

40. Do they have any scars?

:)

Do you want to talk about the scar over his eye from a fight he got in with his dad or like. The scars on his limbs from the time he was literally experimented on.

41. Do they struggle with any mental health issues?

:)

Undiagnosed+Untreated Anxiety, Depression, DPDR, PTSD, just to name a few

42. Do they have any bad habits?

Running away from his problems, definitely.

43. Why might someone dislike them?

He's a pretentious nerd. He can be a dick if he doesn't care about you.

44. Why might someone love them?

He's an adorable nerd! He's a hopeless romantic and oddly enough an optimist. He's passionate and driven too!

45. Do they believe in ghosts?

Well ghosts are like- a canon proven thing in his world sooo. Yeah.

46. Is there anyone they would trust with their lives?

His party. Well- most in his party.

47. Are they romantically interested in anyone?

Nethyl :)

48. Are they dating/married to anyone?

He's dating Nethyl and they're in a happy and healthy relationship :) *politely ignores canon*

49. Do they like surprises?

NO >:(

50. When is their birthday?

Heroya 5th! I think. I don't wanna check, assume it's this.

51. How do they usually celebrate their birthday?

"You guys celebrate your watchdays?"

Jokes aside, he mainly just treats himself to a nice dinner and a new book or something :)

52. Do they have any family?

Two older siblings: Julian and Mila. His parents are Andreas and Fanya!

53. Are they close to their family?

... *Coughs*. He was close with his siblings, but Mila died and he hasn't seen Julian in 30 years. Was close with his dad but last time they saw each other, they fought and Corren might have killed him so. ... Yeah. :/

54. What is their MBTI type?

FUCK uh. I... N... T... J? INTJ. Sure.

55. What is their zodiac sign?

In Sekrezia: The eagle

In our world: Uhhh. Idk. Capricorn????

56. What Hogwarts House would they be in?

Uhhh. Ravenclaw??? I know almost nothing about HP :/

57. What D&D alignment are they?

THIS ONE'S EASY- lawful neutral!

58. Do they ever have nightmares? If so, what about?

:)

Used to have typical nightmares, nothing special. Nowadays though he often dreams of being underwater. Not drowning, though. It's... weird. He doesn't like those.

59. What are their views on death?

He's a necromancer lol.

Death is inevitable, though. It's a necessary part of life. Death is not an entire loss, though. One lives on in the memories others carry of them, in the love they hold in their hearts. Death is complicated, but that's okay.

60. What is something that they’re sure to laugh at?

Alistair :)

61. When bored, how do they pass time?

Dog time :)

62. Do they enjoy being outside?

... Ehhhhhh?

63. Do they have an accent?

Technically??? It's an accent from where he's from but like. I just barely tweak my own voice when I rp him so? Damn Corren I'm sorry you've been cursed with east coast dialect.

64. Upon seeing a slice of chocolate cake, what is their first reaction?

"Damn who's the rich bastard here?" (cake is kinda a delicacy in their world- not like elites only but not NEARLY as common as it is here)

65. If they knew they were going to die, what would they do/say?

Reassurance mode to whomever he's with. "Hey, hey, it's okay. I'm okay. Remember what I told you, death is a natural part of life, yeah? I don't have any regrets, I'm okay... Just. Thanks. For giving me a chance. Thank you. Thank you."

66. How do they feel about sex?

I SWEAR he's allosexual. I'm just bad at writing allosexuals.

67. What is their sexuality?

He doesn't really know how to pin it down, so he just calls himself "queer". Definitely not straight, that's all he knows.

68. Do they become squeamish at the sight of blood?

AHAHA no. He's hella desensitized

69. Is there anything that they find really gross?

Skulking cyst. Look it up at your own volition. It's. NO.

70. Which TV Trope(s) best describes them?

It's 12:21 in the morning and I'm NOT about to scroll through a bunch of tv tropes just. just. NERD stereotype.

71. Do they enjoy helping people?

Yyyyes? Only really if it's the people he cares about.

72. Are they allergic to anything?

Bullshit.

73. Do they have a pet?

WINGTHARA!! HIS SKELE-DOG!!!

74. Are they quick to anger? What are they like when they loose their temper?

Oh yeah he's all bark and no bite. He usually just throws a little fit and/or yells.

75. How patient are they?

More than he should be :/

76. Are they good at cooking?

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

77. Favorite insult? Do they insult people often?

Oh yes he insults the others all the time. No particular favorite, he likes so spice it up.

78. How do they act when they’re particularly happy?

Stim. Stim. Stim. His eyes get all sparkly and he. He.

79. What do they do when they learn about other people’s fears?

He will do everything in his power to assure they won't ever have to deal with their fears alone- You afraid of spiders? It's his job to get the spiders from now on so you won't have to deal with them.

80. Are they trustworthy?

Oh yeah. He's like Rapunzel- doesn't break promises.

81. Do they try to hide their emotions? Are they good at it?

Oh yes he tries to hide it. And yes, he's awful at it.

82. Do they exercise regularly?

Yes and no? No like- exercise regimen, but the amount of travelling and fighting they do is just- a workout in and of itself

83. Are they comfortable with the way they look?

Yeah! He's cute and he knows it baybie!!!

84. What are some physical features that they find attractive on people?

He,,, he likes someone who's physically stong,,, Muscles are,,, aaaaa >///>

85. What kind of personalities do they find attractive?

Someone he can nerd out with :)

86. Do they like sweet foods?

Impartial to it. He won't turn sweets away but he's not crazy about them either.

87. What is their age?

43, the equivalent of- I think someone in their mid 30s?

88. Are they tall or short or somewhere in between?

He's 6'8" :) Which is actually normal for his race

89. Do they wear glasses or contacts?

Sometimes! I like to think he has reading glasses or something like that.

90. Do they consider themselves attractive?

HE'S CUTE AND HE KNOWS IT.

91. What is their sense of humor like?

Julian tainted his sense of humor and now he finds the most dumb shit hilarious. Think very millenial/GenZ humor like "I wish I was Jared, 19"

92. What mood are they most often in?

"I don't get paid enough for this" or Fear.jpg

93. What kinds of things anger them?

People who don't keep their FUCKING WORD. Oh and like. Yknow. Half the shit his party does.

94. Outlook on life?

Again he's??? Oddly an optimist? In the "Things will get better and that is a fucking THREAT" way, but still optimist!

95. What kind of things make them sad/depressed?

Talk about his family :) Or the fact that his boyfriend might want him dead :)

96. What is their greatest weakness?

He's squishy as fuck. He goes down easy.

97. What is their greatest strength?

He's extremely intelligent and great with magic and his sniper!

98. Something that they regret?

Not doing more to stop his brother when he tried to resurrect their sister

99. Biggest accomplishment?

Either convincing an entire town his name is Torren or accidentally convincing some very OP people that he's secretly a dragon.

100. Create your own!

FUCK YOU I SPENT LIKE 2 HOURS ON THIS. NO PROOFREAD. IVE ALREADY DESIGNED CORREN'S AND NETHYL'S HYPOTHETICAL KIDS. ANYWAYS THEY'RE TWIN IRINAGA AND I'VE NAMED THEM AFTER THE DNDADS TWINS: THEIR NAMES ARE LARK AND SPARROW.

[teacupballerina]

Tagged by @chillableu Thank you bro. I am flattered to be one of the few you chose to follow.

1. Name/Nickname: teacup/tcb

2. Gender: female

3. Star Sign: Gemini / Sag moon / Vir rising

4. Height: 5'5

5. Time: 19:27

6. Birthday: May 26

7. Favorite Band: Muse or Shinedown [literally unchanged for 10 and 20 years respectively]

8. Favorite Solo Artist: Maynard James Keenan, any band he is in is also fave.

9. Song Stuck Stuck In My Head: Bread and Circus - Puscifer

10. Last Movie: Demon Slayer Mugen Train in the theater

11. Last Show: Finished Koikimo this week. If you like my art, you would probably like this show.

12. When I Created This Blog: Probably Dec 2010, first posted Jan 2011

13. What I Post: fandom including my art, oc development, shitposting and memes, etc. Like basically every other tumblr user

14. Last Thing I Googled: "salmon lunch recipe" LMFAO

15. Other Blogs: Active are @cnwol @lord-and-leader (unable to hyperlink because its marked) @actionpackjack @redorbshipping @delivererofdarkness and several inactive Aku rp blogs lmfao

16. Do I get asks?: many, and roughly half are answered because I always be thinking of shit to draw for them and then never get around to drawing. So if you sent something and I never answered it was either hate or I was gonna draw to answer it, or am going to eventually draw an answer to it, or just got sidelined sorry

18: Following: 829

17. Why I Chose My URL: initials + random words. made during my lolita fashion phase so that's what came out. But i am short and my art is the equivalent of dancing on my tablet so there’s that.

21. Lucky Number: 4

19. Followers: 3550 plus or minus 10 any given day based on what I post. I gain followers daily but I also lose them daily. LOL

20. Average Hours Of Sleep: I go to bed at 10-11 and wake up at 7 so regularly that I cannot really control getting 8-9 hrs. If I am forced to stay up past 10-11 I will still wake up at 7 but I'll be a wreck. I have epiglottitis-based sleep apnea though so I am always a little bit fucked despite getting a lot of sleep.

22. Instruments: N/A if I ever figure out how to fix my throat I’ll sing again

23. What Am I Wearing: My work smock 🤣

24. Dream job: Dog groomer O SHIT IM DOING THAT ALREADY DAM

25. Favorite Food: Raw salmon/sashimi

27. Nationality: American

28. Favorite Song: 45 by Shinedown I SWEAR I WILL ANIMATIC THIS SOON

29. Last Book I Read: The War for Late Night by Bill Carter

30. Top 3 Fictional Universes I Would Like To Live In: THIS ONE IS FINE THANKS

@ladykeane @cherrycreamfairy @ej-cappy-universe anybody else can do it tho pls just say i tagged you no one will know