#never experienced things that I HAVE DEFO EXPERIENCED.

[dilfsuzanneyk]

ok now some people are just being straight up mean on the weird al poll 😭😭

[melinoelliones]

Meliodas - NSFW ALPHABET

Imma probably do this with a few of the SDS’s characters but imma start with my man <3 If you have any requests drop them in my inbox or comment!! 

Our opinions may be different so don’t jump me LMAO! There are x Fem Reader and X GN Reader

This has been queued for Saturday the 3rd of June n I’ve never done this queue thing before so I pray it works. I am currently super sick from con so bare with me ya’ll.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Meliodas is veryyy touchy feely as we know so he defo wants to be close to you. Probably wraps you up in a blanket and holds you as close to him as physically possible. Wants to make sure you are comfy and feelin okay. Covers you with kisses and tells you how well you did and he’s proud of you. If you’re not too tired he’d defo run you a bath and help bathe you, making sure to be super gentle with you.

B = Body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favourite body part on himself is probably his torso and above. He’s got an impressive set of muscles so I can see him showin em off now and then. Probably loves to show you how easily he can move you wink wink

His favourite body part of yours would be chest, ass and thighs. We all know he’s a titty person but I know for a FACT he wouldn’t pass up the opportunity to have his head between your thighs.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

I wanna say he’d love to see it on that pretty face of yours along with in your mouth. Seeing it drip down the sides of your mouth as you attempt to take every drop.

I also think on your breasts, seeing it run down them is a sight he’d never want to forget.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Barely a secret but he loves to fuck you in public, especially in risky places. Like during rush hour at the Boar Hat he slips you into the closet downstairs, or he’ll have you standing behind the bar while he eats you out on his knees, you struggling to take orders as he does it. Defo likes to play with you under the table at the Sins meeting too, 98% sure everyone knows what he’s doing but acts oblivious. 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

You was his first and vice versa. He defo knows what he’s doing and is always down for experimenting.

F = Favourite position (this goes without saying)

Reverse cowgirl is one of them, he loves to see himself sliding in and out of you along with your ass

Us riding him, he’s a tits guy so having them bounce in his face while you’re taking him all in is like a 2 in one. Bonus points if he gets one in his mouth, he loves to suck on them while you struggle to keep going.

Doggy, especially after a rough day. He wants nothing more than to see how you moan and tear up as he pounds into you with absolutely zero remorse. Seeing how you desperately cry out for him to be rougher with you is a sight to see

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Helloooo its Meliodas we are talking about. It wouldn’t be Meli if he didn’t crack a joke here and there. Loves to make you laugh regardless so if he can while fucking you why wouldn’t he?

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

I will die on this hill but I think he keeps himself trimmed pretty good! He ain’t naked or anything but keeps it nice. 

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Depends. Most of the time he’s superrrr intimate, showering you will kisses and sweet talking you. But other times not so much but there is a BALANCE!! He will always show you a sweet side though, even during the roughest of sessions.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He can defo jack off to just the thought of you alone. I don’t wanna say its often as he’s around you 24/7 and would prefer to do it with you/in you than alone, but if he’s super pent up then aye, gotta do what ya gotta do. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

THIS IS MY OPINION BUT

Breeding kink for sure. Dude wants nothing more than to breed you, to fill you up to the brim and see you pregnant. The thought of you holding his child is one that sits in his mind constantly.

Dumbification, fucking you till you can’t even form a thought in your mind. The only thing you can do is cry out for more of him. 

Restraints, this is pretty canon anyway but yeah. He loves to be tied up while you get full control to do whatever you please with his body, wether that be for his satisfaction or yours he does not care as long as you’re happy. He also likes to tie you up and watch your body twitch as he plays with you.

Somnophilia, he thinks you look so pretty and innocent while you sleep. On more than one occasion he has defo eaten you out whilst you slept, waking you up with the mother of all orgasms. When he’s come home late from being with the sins he has used your body to help him relieve some stress. ALL 100% CONSENSUAL BETWEEN YOU TWO! 

Uniforms, he loves to fuck you in your Boar Hat uniform. He designed it so of course yours is a tiny bit smaller than the others, along with extra openings for easy access. He has several different versions of the uniform so you get to test them all.

Breast fucking for sureeeee. He loves your tits, so having his cock between them is a dream come true.

Also the thought of being seen turns him on to the MAX! Having people see how good he fucks you and how he makes you feel. 

L = Location (favourite places to do they do)

He loves anywhere in the Boar Hat; over the tables, on the counter, against the door. Eating you out on the tables or counter is his favourite pastime. He also loves the bedroom, your face full of pillow n tears while he rams into you, loves it. 

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You, just you. Anything you do honestly.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)

I feel like he’s down for almost anything but doesn’t want anything to do with like knives or blood. 

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He prefers to give than receive but he loves to receive. Would give anything to have you sit on his face after a long day, he’d gladly eat you out while you tell him all about it. You are his favourite meal.

“What’s up, why the long face? Come sit on my face while you tell me”

He likes to receive too but it’s not a necessity, seeing you attempt to make him feel good is a major turn on though. You on your knees, his cock down your throat with tears in your eyes, he adores it. He gives you all the praise as you suck him off. 

“Look at you, you're doing such a good job”, he’d coo as he’d stroke the side of your face whilst deepthroating him.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

All of the above. 

Sometimes he’ll be super rough, demon mark showing and all while he pounds into you to the point where you’re almost drooling. No thoughts in your mind, only his name ringing through. Dirty talk all the way.

Other times he’s super slow and intimate, taking his time so you can enjoy every feeling, every movement. Smothering you in love bites and comments as he pulls in and out of you.

During quickies it's a mix of both.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

HE LIVESSSS FOR A QUICKIE! Especially since the sins are always on the go, they need to be able to do it anywhere and FAST. I wanna say y'all have them several times a week, he’s always up for em. 

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He is the definition of risk taker. The sins are coming back and there's like 5 minutes till they get back? Okay lets fuck right here on this table before they make it. Oh the King is coming downstairs? Let's have a quickie before he gets here. Like he does not CAREEEEEEE! 

He also loves to experiment. Anything you wanna try he will do and if he has an idea he will always bring it up to you.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Demon Kings first born, dude has stamina for days. He could go like 4 rounds without breakin a sweat. You are his weakness though so sometimes he won’t last very long in you, like if you’re begging and whining out for him.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He has toys for you, for when he is gone and can’t bring you. He also loves to edge you with a vibrator then take over. He lets you have free reign when it comes to toys for him, whatever you want him to try he’s open. 

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Oh he’s a teaser! Sometimes he can be super mean and leave you for a considerable amount of time until you lose your orgasm before going back. But only sometimes, regardless he does love to see you beg for him to let you come or beg for him to touch you and make you feel good.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He isn’t super loud unless like you’re sucking him off, he defo whimpers and whines a little when you do it, a few hisses and curses too.

He loves when you’re super loud though, he wants everyone to know how well he fucks you. He legit does not care who can hear as long as they can hear. Wants to hear you moan out his name through the tavern.

The sins hate it but then they invested in soundproof walls LMAO. 

W = Wild card (a random dirty headcanon for the character)

Okay this one is kinda random and i’m 50/50 on it but he wants to see Ban fuck you. He wants to watch it. Watch how Ban attempts to outdo him but knows he could never as you shoot him a wink or a moan he knows is fake. That or a threesome with you and Ban. He’d take front to see your pretty little face while Ban takes back.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Meli is big, don’t care what anyone says. He is girthy and veiny. Maybe not super long but trust me, the girth alone will have you on cloud 9. Let's say 6/7 inches ish.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Crazy high. Ya’ll are defo fucking almost everyday, wether that be quickies or long sessions, its pretty much everyday. 

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterward)

He will always wait for you to be in a deep sleep before even thinking about passing out. He will hold you close to him on his chest until he hears your soft snores, gives you a kiss on the top of your head and THEN falls asleep. He can’t sleep unless he knows you feel safe and comfortable.

[nordidia]

Do you think CJ and Raph ever talk about their experiences with PTSD/anxiety together or even share advice on coping? Or do you think Raph would rather not? Explain your reasoning in your essay below

(i typed an entire novel and then accidentally closed chrome and it deleted everything let me try doing this again i barely remember what i said ok so. also this is just me blabbering idk guys im not a rise writer im just some opinionated guy online and you can completely disagree with me and i dont say what goes or not ok? ok!)

i dont think raph would go to him with his issues but i think it'd defo get talked about through asking CJ about things and checking up on him etc. and i think CJ would give raph alot of insight and advice on how to deal with anxieties and traumas,, tho alot of their convos would just be one of them saying something vile and the other one going "oh. is that not normal?" and the first one looking at the latter like this

but all in all i think they'd definitely help eachother with dealing with stuff... i think especially raph will assist CJ in just taking the blow on how much there is to unpack... his entire life has been a big traumatic event, i imagine suddenly living a sustained life without having to fight for survival every day would be a lot for him to deal with, especially the confusion and grief over what he has lost (maybe what he has lost feels a bit like pointless grief to him now? which is a trauma in itself) and also grieving what he never had. as we know, grief is also things we shouldve had but never got, and i think all the hamatos would be really helpful in dealing with that.

tho CJ seems to be a bit of a hardass on stuff like this which is incredibly understandable when you've had to fight for everything with zero stability at all anywhere you went. i could see him confiding in raph about it, but not only him if im honest. but there is an undeniable security about raph i think that the characters i the show feel, and i think CJ would seek the stability and consistent reliability that raph provides.

i also like that CJ doesnt seem too scared about calling out people when they do wrong, i can defo see CJ bluntly telling raph that bad coping mechanisms is stupid and makes things worse and worries everyone around. (this is ofc hand in hand with the good ol' HC that raph bottles shit up/avoids talking abt things. personally i think he never shuts up and frequently rants about stuff and lets his family know whenever shit is up but he avoids going too deep so his family thinks he's being fully transparent when actually he's just not voicing the worst shit. this is so real to me no i do not need therapy shut u)

i definitely think raph would confide in CJ about the krang thing. CJ is the one who knows the most about it, i can see raph going to him to just get a bit more information about what was going on, and also a bit of relief hearing that it didnt go as bad as it couldve gone... CJ being experienced with krangification would absolutely soothe worries and make him feel less alone about knowing what he knows and having gone through something thats a step further than his brothers

IS THIS A GOOD ENOUGH ESSAY i have academic anxiety dont grade me please its 4am i have taken melatonin pills im on my last leg help m *ficking dies*

edit: GOODNIGHT LOL

[heliads]

Hey again! Got another idea 👀👀 But could I request a Clove Kentwell x past victor reader (won very young) who lives in the capitol? Reader is good friends with Enobaria and Brutus and decides to check in with the tributes/mentors of that years game to see what's up and to give some tips and tricks. Immediately she hit's it off with the other careers other then Clove (who likes her but has no idea how to go about it), they accidently meet on the balcony and start to warm up with each other (R gives Clove a token since she didn't get one). Later on R watches the games with the mentors and not so secretly cheers on Clove (defo get's her sponsor packages). Clove wins and they reunite, with clove making the first move after realizing her feelings during the game. Thank you, and I hope this isn't too long!

'lessons worth learning' - clove kentwell

masterlist

The Hunger Games is always your least favorite time to return to the Capitol. As if any of the other opportunities are good, though; you can be trotted around like a prize pony, gawked at as a Mentor, or called up out of the blue to reminisce on the good old days when you won your Games and were lucky enough to have the lovely experience of murdering children who had done no wrong other than the simple misfortune of having their name pulled from a bowl.

The Games are worse, though. You stand on a balcony, knuckles tight like bone around the railing. Below you, two dozen children ripe for the slaughter mill around, testing weapons and receiving instruction from their mentors. You’re here for mentorship duties yourself, having won your Games a couple of years back and thus entitling you to spend the rest of your life watching other tributes attempt to do the same or die trying.

Some would call it a blessing. Sometimes, though, you envy the dead back in your Games. Their lives, although ended early, are theirs, and theirs alone. They won’t have to live forever as a poster child of the Capitol, an example of what District can amount to if they just try. That isn’t to say that you wish you had died in the Games– you are a fighter, always have been, and you’d rather bleed a thousand times than give up– but you do wish that you could have won without having to be a puppet for all the Games afterwards.

All the Victors know the feeling. You ache like a dog on a leash, all of you, having trained all your lives to win the Games if you were Careers or at least dreaded them your entire childhood, but upon doing the one task set before you, every pretense of independence was ripped away. What was once a prize mastiff or foxhound is now a muzzled lapdog, dolled up every season of the Games before being shut up in the Districts once the fun is over.

The first year of your Victorhood, you could hardly handle it. Everything was switched around. The jokes weren’t funny, and what was worth laughing at could cost your head. The food was too much and the clothes were too little. It was like living in a backwards world, one where one false step would bring destruction to you and your family.

Thankfully, you had your other Victors to help you. Enobaria and Brutus, also from your home district of Two, walked you through the gilded trials of a successful Victor, and in turn, you mentor the next sets of tributes to be sent your way. You won your Games young, surprisingly young, so Brutus and Enobaria tend to be the ones selected for primary Mentorship. 

Turns out most tributes prefer to be taught by actual adults, thinking them more experienced and a better shot at their own survival. That’s fine by you, by all accounts; the more time out of the limelight, the better. You’re still required to show up to the Capitol, being the youngest Victor in quite a while means you’ll never fully be released from the Capitol’s fascination, but you can be a quiet darling in the shadows any time you like. If there’s one thing the years have taught you, it’s that it is far, far better to be the dusty doll left behind in the toy chest than the one out on display.

This time around, however, Brutus and Enobaria called you up to give the tributes some advice. District Two hasn’t won a round of the Games since– well, since you, and that was more than a couple of years ago. Since you’re the most recent Two victor, you’ll have valuable insights to provide. Supposedly.

Thus, you find yourself leaning against this balcony, watching the tributes prepare themselves to die. There’s a good amount of competition amongst the Reaped ones this year, it’ll be a tough fight. You don’t envy anyone down there for the task they’ll have to face. Both the tributes from One look formidable, plus a good crop of others from a smattering of districts. Of course, your fellow tributes from Two look strong too, but maybe that’s just wishful thinking.

Then again, the girl from Two this year, a certain Clove Kentwell, does seem to be impressing everyone in her path. She’s about your age, and you probably would have seen her around Two more often were it not for the fact that you’re more fond of suppressing memories in the Victor’s Village than training for the Games you’ll never have to enter again. She seems clever, which is a good thing. Clever girls can get themselves out of deadly loopholes. You can speak to that through past experience.

She’s watching you now, actually. It’s no surprise. Clove has been keeping her eyes on you since the moment she was Reaped. At this point, the quiet weight of her gaze on your shoulders has grown comfortable, more like a woolen cloak than a knife in your back. It’s not a hostile gaze either, this, just painstakingly present. Clove doesn’t mind it if you catch her looking. She’s not the type to glance away first. Good. Anything to keep weakness off her shoulders.

Clove’s fingers tap absentmindedly on her legs, then she seems to make a decision and walks up to talk to you. Your eyes flash to the Peacekeepers stationed at the exits, but they don’t flinch. Still, you have no doubt that they’re watching. It’s fine if the tributes want to talk to the Mentors, but you can’t give them any weapons, nor any advantage at all other than a few good pieces of advice. There’s only so far advice will go anyway, but you might as well offer up what you have. At least then you won’t leave this round of the Games as you do every other:  wondering if what you’d done was enough, and then trying to scrub another set of two young names out of your brain for another year in a row.

Clove reaches the top of the balcony and folds her arms across her chest, eyeing you down like you’re another tribute. It’s a mistake that’s been made before, actually. You’re awfully young for a Mentor, but then again, you were awfully young for a Victor as well.

“So, you’re supposed to be helping me win these things?” She asks daringly.

You nod. “You and your fellow tribute.”

Clove knows this, of course. She’s testing the waters, searching for some kind of reaction. You’re not sure what she wants, but she’ll probably convince herself of it soon enough anyway. Better not to get involved. Better not to get attached. You know how this ends, don’t you? You know better than to enjoy someone’s company if you know they’re going to die.

“You won a few years ago, didn’t you? You were the young one they couldn’t stop talking about?” Clove asks.

You force a smile. It’s as cold and disinterested as you can make it. “That’s me. Although I would have assumed your plan for winning the Games wouldn’t involve rattling off exciting facts about mine.”

“Isn’t it your job to share details about your Games so you can give me a strategy to win mine?” Clove snips at you. She’s fiery. Like you, when you dare to let your spark grow out of the stifling embrace of the Capitol.

“No two Games are the same,” you shoot back. “It’s a better use of your time and mine to consider the current situation instead of mulling over the past. The only things you should think about right now are the present and the immediate future. The next few weeks are your entire life. The past can rot with the rest of the tributes who died because they failed to plan properly.”

Clove whistles. “Charming. Did Brutus and Enobaria bring you here because of your knack for motivational speeches?”

Your grin is bitter. “That, and they knew I wouldn’t coddle you. These are the Hunger Games, Clove. Realism is all you have.”

“Because the Hunger Games are all that will matter in my life?” Clove asks, tone acidic. “Funny, I didn’t think the youngest Victor would have agreed with that.”

“I don’t,” you answer her. “It’s because you’re going to win the Games, and then you’re going to go home, and none of it will have mattered at all.”

Clove pulls a face, disbelieving. “Of course. Winning the Hunger Games won’t mean a single thing in Two. That makes perfect sense.”

“It won’t matter,” you insist, “Sure, it will, for a couple of days. Then you’ll be in Victor’s Village with the rest of District Two’s idols and you’ll blend right in. For months afterwards, you will be flush with victory, knowing you’ve done this spectacular thing, and no one will even care. It’ll be all you can think about, and no one will know. This is the Hunger Games, Clove Kentwell. They matter to you because you’re in them, but once everyone else knows their name won’t be pulled, it’s nothing to them.”

Clove’s eyes have gone quiet. “They’ll have to remember, though. Every year, when they make us do the Victory Tour or go back to the Capitol.”

“Sure, sure,” you say listlessly. “You’ll be one of the Victors. But they’ll forget what year you won, or what you did to deserve it. After a while, they won’t be able to remember if you were the sibling of a Victor, or the lover, or a friend. What do you think happened to me, huh? When you came in here, you didn’t even know my name, and I won just a couple of years ago. Face it, Clove. It all ends after this.”

Clove is silent for a while, and when she speaks again, her voice is quiet and wooden. “So how do I fight that? How do I be someone they’ll remember?”

You chuckle bitterly. “You can’t.”

Clove’s face flashes with irritation. “Then why are you here, huh? I thought Mentors were supposed to help us. Is your job just to depress us and then leave? Whose side are you really on?”

She’s started moving towards you with every word, inching forward threateningly. You don’t back down or move a muscle, and when you’re both eye to eye, barely a few inches apart, close enough to see how her chest rises and falls with the brunt of her anger, you bite out at last, “Yours.”

“I don’t believe you,” Clove hisses back.

You smirk. It’s not a nice thing to see. The Capitol has stripped the warmth from your emotions, leaving only blank ghosts of what were once shiny, vivid expressions. “You don’t have to. Look around you. You are in the Capitol. Look at how everyone here looks at you.”

You put your hand on Clove’s cheekbone, forcing her to turn around. You can see it in her expression as she gets what you’re saying, how her eyes harden even more, how she shifts back away from everyone else and towards you again. This, after all, is what it means to be a tribute. The Capitol citizens eye you like a piece of meat, the other competitors stare you down like a hawk who’s caught onto its prey. There are no friendly faces here, just territorial or greedy or both.

“So you’re the better option,” Clove murmurs.

“That’s one way of putting it,” you admit. “I know how it feels to be out there. Alone, despite your Mentors.”

“And you wanted to make sure I felt that, too?” Clove asks, somewhat bemused.

You shake your head. “I wanted you to feel the opposite.”

Clove considers this, then looks back at you again. The hostility is gone from her eyes, replaced with curiosity. “I think I do,” she says.

“Good,” you tell her. “Now we can work together on how to make you win this.”

After that, Clove is focused, her simmering rage honed to a knifepoint’s sharpness. She finds precise techniques to master and practices them over and over again until she’s sure of herself. Those skills that she’s unfamiliar with, she gains a bare capability. She doesn’t need to be good at everything, just not bad at anything. It’s far harder than it sounds, but Clove is all too willing a pupil.

Enobaria finds you later that night. She’s mulling over a drink, and you’re watching the recordings of the tributes’ daily trainings over again so you can spot any weaknesses or potential allies. “The girl seems to be taking to your lessons,” she notes. Her sharpened teeth flash in the low light of the room.

You keep your eyes on the screen ahead of you. “Clove is a proper Career. She makes our district proud. She’s had a lifetime of lessons, and not just mine.”

“Clove?” Enobaria asks, eyebrow arched as she calls out the first name basis. “Getting along quite nicely, aren’t you?”

You elect not to comment, instead focusing on the image of Clove’s form on the recording as she practices with her knives. Enobaria shakes her head, chuckling softly in a manner not too far removed from a jackal when it sights its prey. “I thought you knew better than to get attached to tributes, Y/N. You know Mentors should never fixate on those that will likely end up dead.”

“Of course,” you answer her. “And when you were mentoring me, you never did anything of the sort, right?”

With that comment, you finally look up at her, grinning slightly. Enobaria barks out a laugh, knowing full well that she’d seen you as a sister while you were training. “Get some rest,” she tells you at last. “Your Clove needs you to be functional.”

Your Clove. You can’t deny that you like the ring of it. Enobaria is right to warn you to keep your emotional guard up, though. Soon enough, the week of training is up, and then the tributes are receiving their last words of advice from their Mentors before being sent to the Arena.

You meet with Clove one final time, relating the last bits of information, though the last thing you say to her isn’t practical guidance but a raw, naked hope that she will survive. She promises you she’ll win. You’ve heard many such promises, but for the first time, you believe it.

Then she’s gone, and you are alone with only the other Mentors and Victors to guide you. There’s not a moment to waste, though. Clove has hardly vanished from your sight before you’re racing back up to the viewing stations, where you fling yourself wholeheartedly into the masterful game of winning over sponsors. If Clove has to be out there, fighting for her life, you’ll make sure she’s doing so with the best weapons, medicine, and food that you can bring her.

It’s a terrible thing, sending a friend to die. Worse still when Clove was the first tribute you let through your walls in a very long time. You spent a while winning her over with your experience as a tribute, but Clove won you over too. You watch her as much as you dare, your brave girl, cheering whenever she survives a tricky situation and engulfed in fear whenever she’s in trouble.

At the end of a couple of the longest weeks of your life, though, Clove emerges victorious, the final cannon blast signaling the end of her trials. You swear that you were more stressed during the showdown of the last two tributes than during your own Games, although surely that would be impossible. Clove is brought back from the Arena and immediately checked into the medical wing to handle several injuries from the final fight.

Once visitors are allowed, though, you’re the first one through that door. Clove is in your arms at once. Her eyes are bright upon seeing you, but there’s a shadow that wasn’t there before. She’s a Victor now. It’s not all grand and glorious celebrations. Once the euphoria of still being alive wears off, Clove will have to walk the longer and harder path, the one that doesn’t let you go after a matter of weeks. The memories of this torment will stick with her forever, and the nightmares don’t ease up just because you get older.

Clove will have you, though. Always. You promise her this now, and have just enough time to see the rush of relief in her expression before you’re separated again. Clove will have to be made over by her team so she can be crowned Victor in front of the Capitol. They’ll make her talk about the kills and the narrow escapes, but then she can leave, and so can you.

You watch her from the audience during the interview, then meet her backstage afterwards. She pulls you into a dark corridor behind the grand mess of stylists and Capitol citizens. There are many annexes and mouse holes in the mansions of the Capitol, small places to be alone if you only know where to look.

“You were stunning,” you tell her honestly.

“It’s over now,” she says dazedly. “Isn’t it?”

“It is,” you confirm. “You’ll go home. You’ll recover. They’ll drag a few more appearances out of you, but it’s over. You won.”

“I don’t know how to handle this part,” she confesses. “I don’t know how to be a Victor. Will you show me?”

“Of course,” you whisper. “You’ll be perfect at it, just like you were in the Games. You earned that crown, Clove. Be happy. As happy as you can.”

Clove’s eyes shine, rivaling the low glow of the Victor’s crown nestled in her dark curls. Out of some impulse, she reaches up and plucks the gold circlet from her temples before placing it on your head instead. Her hand lingers near your face, dropping slowly from your forehead to your cheek, where her fingers remain, soft against your skin. These are the hands that are responsible for twenty-three dead tributes, and your mouth is the one who taught her how to do it. Still, when it is just the two of you in the quiet dark, you would swear that you and Clove have only ever done good things; pure, too, like falling in love with a girl who grew up loving you, like finding someone to guide through death itself and ensuring that she would walk out the other side.

“I remember that from your Games,” she says dazedly. “You looked good with the crown.”

You laugh quietly. “If that’s all you remembered about my Games, I would be happy.”

Clove’s eyes are dark and large. Falling into them is easy, you don’t think you could escape if you tried. What a sweet way to drown. “If this is all I remember about mine, I would be happy, too.”

You take her hands in the dark. “I’ll help you forget if you help me.”

“Together,” Clove says. “Promise it.”

“Together,” you swear. “Always.” There is no such thing as always, not in the Capitol. Not in this hopeless city, not in this starving country. For a moment, though, for two girls away from the prying eyes of the world, it exists as a bond between the two of them, drawing them inexplicably and permanently together. It’s an oath of blood and gold, a crown that soothes and cuts to the core. Nothing is good here, not in Panem, but you will have Clove, and you will have her always.

requested by @beepboopnel-deactivated20240128, i hope you enjoy!

hunger games tag list: @w1shes43, @ilovexavierthrope

all tags list: @wordsarelife

[mmmfanfiction]

Hi!! Ik your probably stressed bc ur really active XD but I hope you drink some water and get some rest. When you find the time to write could I request a flippy/flipqy x reader Christmas head cannons?

Also if your doing the anon thing could I be -🌹 anon ?

Thats super sweet of you, anon! I hope that you’re getting a bunch of water and rest too! Sorry this came in so late, I started writing but didn’t finish. However I did give myself the deadline of Christmas which helped me actually finish this (finishing things on the deadline gang) anyway, I hope you like it!

warnings: mentions of death, literally nothing else just me imagining Fliqpy being like a lethal house cat-

Flippy

🧸I like to think Christmas is like a sense of nostalgia for Flippy.

🧸Like he’s done it his entire life, so it brings him back to his childhood.

🧸Flippy defo decorates, but not in the overboard, as soon as thanksgiving ends, everything’s lit up kind of way.

🧸More of a chill decorator. Doesn’t go all out but theirs definitely decoration.

🧸However if your one of those big decorators he will definitely help out with some things. Also he won’t let you go on the roof unless your experienced. Even then he’s like hovering below you.

🌹”Babe I’m not gonna fall, you don’t have to follow me wherever I go with that pillow.”

🧸”But I don’t want you to get hurt :(“

🧸I feel like he knows how to make REALLY good hot cocoa

🧸Like, tastes like it’s straight from heaven.

🧸He makes amazing cookies too.

🧸Also crochets cute little Christmas sweaters.

🧸Even makes matching ones.

🧸Flip definitely puts lots of thought into gifts.

🧸Like he will ask everyone you know just to gauge the best thing to get for you.

🧸His wrapping looks really good!….. if you don’t look at the bottom-

🧸Is open to trying new traditions. Like if you have a bit more spice added to your Christmas traditions then he’ll try them out too!

🧸Has like really obscure but also really sweet Christmas movies.

🧸Also old ones, like the stop motion Rudolf the reigndeer. 

🧸Just please don’t let him watch nightmare before Christmas, or at least avoid the one scene where the military starts shooting down Jack. That will not be a good time for either of you, especially not poor Flips.:(

🧸All in all, very warm n cuddly being w/ Flippy on Christmas. 

Fliqpy

🔪Now this little shit-

🔪Idk where that was going I just wanted to call Fliqpy a little shit.

🔪Anyways he’s not used to Christmas.

🔪Would 100% use the lights to strangle someone-

🔪Though he’s really good to have around if you wanna chop your own tree.

🔪The first Christmas he spends with you I don’t imagine him really getting you anything, and also getting flustered when you give him a gift.

🔪Afterwords he starts putting a bit more effort into this whole Christmas thing.

🔪Either a really shitty gift giver or a really great gift giver. No inbetween 

🔪Will fall asleep during Christmas movies.

🔪Unless maybe it doubles as a horror movie. Like idk Black Christmas or smth(I’ve never watched Black Christmas so don’t quote me on that but I really want to but I don’t want my mum to walk in and be like ‘WTF ARE YOU WATCHING!?’ Anyways back on track)

🔪Flippys not used to the domestic vibe of Christmas

🔪However if you also believe in Krampus he might be a liiittttleee bit more into it(long live Krampus)

🔪I imagine he really likes hot cocoa but won’t admit it.

🔪Also thinks Santa’s a creep

🔪”So, let me get this straight. You celebrate a dude BREAKING INTO YOUR HOUSE??”

🌹”…. He gives us gifts-“

🔪Really good at wrapping things to make them look like something they’re not. Like you think you’re opening a doll but it’s actually a pocket knife :)

[skrunksthatwunk]

no this is really good thanks FIRST here's a picture of the boy in question

hooray!!!!! :)

ok recap this is a kitten (im putting him at around 10-12 weeks old) named rascal that belongs to someone on my floor and long story short they've had him for a couple of months and they're shitty to him so me and my roommate have been doing little "oh he can stay with us if you want some peace and quiet 🤗🤗🤗" type stuff to like. get him out of there and also maybe?? take him in full-time? shit's complicated but anyway he's very sweet and lovely and a bouncing baby boy and also the only cat I've spent more than a couple hours with (<- dog upbringing; allergic mother) much less a kitten so we're still feeling each other out me and mr rascal

but his owner and her roommate don't have a lot for him like zero cat furniture just a couple toys a litter box and bowls. nothing to scratch on even which is like. bare minimum to keep him comfy. and I mean the bar is so much lower than that but whatever. (maybe that's why y'all think he's an asshole and he just so happens to like us more. because you don't pay attention to him or treat him nice when you do. guh. augh. moving on) my point is his outlets are limited and he has kitten energy

anyway I figured maybe he was just kinda in a playfighting mood bc I know cats (and especially kittens) do that? especially the pouncing and rolling on his back and kicking and mouthing at you thing, like I know my dogs do that.. but now that we're on day two or three of him being here and he's got toys (besides my little cloth skirt tie lol) now I think I can tell better when he's restless vs when ive pet him wrong bc the reaction's different

he can be VERY cuddly, like he's slept curled up on/against me both nights and he's very like. headbutt let me lick the skin off your nose typea guy when he settles down. but I know that fluctuates with cats (as with anyone), so there's gonna be times he doesn't wanna be pet. I guess I just didn't expect there to be times he wanted to sit in my lap and also not have me pet him? I thought it'd be more don't touch me vs it's time for me to put my butt in your face. im cool with the inbetween and it makes sense in hindsight it's just hard to differentiate it from the times he'll bite me whether im touching him or not. like I'll be like ok cool little buddy you wanna just sit in my lap? no worries let's hang <3 and he's like. but what if I just bit you :3 and im like buddy that hurts don't do that and he's like but just a little? and then a lot like a lot a lot? like no I can't my hands bro im an artist I need these and he's like. a nibble :3? with all of my teeth :33? anyway looking into ways to redirect that positively we're working on it etc . also he might just be teething bc the puppies I've spent time around also did that and he's around that age and again his outlets are limited

anyway interactions are getting smoother bc I think im getting what works for him and what he wants better and he's getting chattier which I think is good? in a like meow when you come back from the bathroom way. but yeah captain stinkass you kinda bewilder me. like I'll be doing nothing and he'll try to alligator death roll my foot. what's on your mind brother. but I've learned that sometimes all you need to do is put him on the next lowest flat surface. like go like 2 feet away from me my man. my friend my buddy my angel rascal go to gay baby jail for a minute i only have so much neosporin. also sometimes he'll sit on my keyboard and stare at me and bite at me if I offer him my hand but if I move him to my lap he's like ah :) tranquility. like he needed to coexist but I needed him to not turbodelete my work that's due in 13 minutes and this is a compromise that works like 70% of the time. and also I have to wonder if some of it is because of the shitty company he's in now bc like. maybe that's why he bites me if he wants something instead of meowing. not sure. could be youth could be trauma could be me just not understanding quite yet. probably a combo but we're making progress fast. little man is settling in hooray

anyway he's a great guy and also literally like a baby like an actual child and he just needs a little patience and attention. basic respect. and also something to scratch and bite bc 1. necessary for cats to keep their claws short and comfy and also just a good outlet and 2. damn. owiee.

cat theory/update he'll often get in my lap and then bite me if I try to pet him and I think maybe he just wants to sit there? and not be pet? bc he's purring a lot (though he kinda purrs a lot anyway)

I assumed it was an I wanna play thing but idk

[apphiarothowrites]

A second sneak peek

this whole fuckin' fic man, it's kicking my ass so hard. The schedule is defo slipping and I can't even get mad about it because of how hard this whole thing is kicking me.

anyway, here have a sneak peek at the one part of chapter 3 that I'm actually satisfied with

He doesn’t even have to dodge. Sand and strings flying around him, eventually descending to the base of the execution stand, and he doesn’t have to dodge a single move. It wasn’t about him. It was never about him.

None of this was, truly, about him. No one is listening to him-not Pops nor Marco, not Garp, not Luffy. He wonders, as the despondence and isolation of a fight that ignores his existence begins to really settle into his rib cage, if he’s worth listening to. If he was ever worth listening to.

If he was ever worth anything at all. 

There’s nothing you can do. A voice echoes at him, the context missing but the tone warm.

He lifts his head, straining and trying to remember who could have said something so horrible but so happily. The voice is familiar but so distant-everything in his head scrambled as despair eats his hollow chest. The fight, the weakness from the seastone, being cut off from his element-cut off from himself… He can’t fight it, and it’s getting harder and harder to keep trying to fight it.

There’s nothing you can be. It echoes again, contextless and comfortable.

Gods above and below, who could have said that?? What the hell could they have meant? No, he knows what they meant. He could even take a fair guess at why they would have said it. He is nothing-worse than nothing he is cursed. Born to die, born to destroy the lives of others as he dies. He’s worse than nothing-

There’s nothing that you can say- It echoes forward, a faceless memory that makes his heart pound for reasons beyond his understanding. It’s reassuring, somehow, like a valve beginning to turn and release pressure held back. But for what remains of the life of him he can’t remember why that is nor who said it.

Tears build up, liquid fire burning his eyelids and dripping. He can’t figure any of this shit out-just like always, the answers just out of reach and awaiting a more experienced hand to guide him towards them-

That I won’t forgive. “I’m coming Ace!”

Marco.

Of course it’s Marco.

A blue flash rises from below the wall, brilliant and golden and hungry for success-

Garp’s fist, crashing down and sending that beautiful bird to the ground. He can’t see where Marco’s landed, but he can feel the man’s gaze upon him. Something flickers to life in his chest. A warmth in the cold and hopelessness.

Something is trying to build, to grow, to spur action and Ace-

Ace feels…so strange…

He almost feels-

“I…I want…”

The words come almost unbidden.

There’s nothing you can do, nothing you can be, nothing that you can say–

He realizes he lied before. For a moment, he feels the echo of Luffy’s laughter pressed to his back where his little brother has been carried before. For a moment he feels Marco’s arms and wings and strange wailing birdsong inside his chest where he’s buried him before. For a moment the ground shakes under him as Pops tosses his head back to laugh. For a bare brief moment, he feels another hand in his as he goes running and laughing from an irate town guard and Sabo’s laughing with him.

He realizes that he’s lied before-to the world and to himself. 

That I won’t forgive.

He lied to Marco. He lied to Pops. He lied to Luffy and Sabo and and the world and most importantly he lied to himself. He’s been lying to himself, for almost his entire existence. And Marco-Marco was the first to forgive him for it.

His heart feels like it’s bursting in his chest, the truth laid bare before his mind’s eye. He feels so strange, so–

“I want to live!”

Free.

[issie-https]

A-Z Headcanons

Duff Mckagan X Reader Headcanons

A/n: I literally love this man sm! My fav Giraffe(fun fact: they’re my fav animal!). Anyways, enjoy this❤️

Word count: 1020

Warnings: Smut!!!

Masterlist

༺��༻

A - Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

Absolutely loves aftercare for the both of youse. You rub his back and then he'll run you both a bath. Something like that. You love treating each other after sex.

B - Body Part (their favorite body part of theirs and their partner's)

I feel like he loves his legs, after all, he is like 80% leg. Tall man but we love that because he's an adorable giraffe.

His favourite part of you is your boobs. I feel like he's 100% a boob man idk why. Loves to hold your boobs, massage them, etc.

C - Cum (anything to do with cum)

Honestly, he's not a big fan of getting it everywhere but he'll probs cum on your tits every so often. But overall, just prefers to cum in you.

D - Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs)

Idk if this counts but I feel like this man would be LOUD. Like when you fuck for the first time and he basically shouts, it takes you by surprise. But who's complaining? Not me.

E - Experience (how experienced are they)

He fucks good but I don't feel like he's as experienced as Axl or Slash.

F - Favorite Position (self explanatory)

Either cowgirl or missionary. He would do others but he likes to be close to you and feel you fully. But overall, he prefers to stick to what he knows best.

G - Goofy (are they more silly or serious in the moment)

I don't think he's like serious but he's also not cracking jokes constantly. It's fun and romantic though and we love that.

H - Hair (how well groomed are they)

Honestly, I cannot decide if he trims or shaves, maybe a bit of both depending on what he feels like, yk?

I - Intimacy (how are they during the moment, romantic aspect)

Very romantic. Candles, praising, stroking his thumb on your face, etc.

J - Jack Off (masturbation headcanon)

Okay, imagine this. You come home from work a little earlier than usual and you hear Duff moaning and whimpering so you go to the bedroom, open the door to find Duff jerking off and it is the most sexy and cute thing ever bcos he moaning your name and stuff.

I feel like something like that would happen and from then on, you have some mutual masturbation moments.

K - Kink (one or more of their kinks)

I don't think he'd have too many but he's down for almost anything. Public sex(maybe in the studio?), voyeurism, CNC(consensual non-consent), Dominance and some other stuff. I don't think he's vanilla at all but defo not a mental man.

L - Location (favorite place to do the do)

The sofa(or couch whatever you call it). He loves to have you ride him while looking into his eyes as I said before, he loves to be close to you and hold you tight and what better way than on the sofa!

M - Motivation (what gets them going)

Honestly, anything to do with you. Knowing you'll feel good, knowing you're his and his only. You're his muse.

N - NO (something they won't do, turn offs)

This man is down for anything but if there's something he doesn't particularly enjoy, he'll let you know.

O - Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skills)

Loves it but prefers to just straight up fuck you. Will never turn it down though(you or him receiving, duh).

P - Pace (are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual)

Most of the time, he's romantic and at a steady pace(not slow but not speedy). However, in the rare moment when you want him to pound into you, he will leave you unable to walk for the next week.

Q - Quickie (their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex)

A quickie in the bathroom of a party or in the studio? Yes please! He loves the thought that one of the guys could walk in at any moment and catch him balls-deep inside you.

R - Risk (are they game to experiment)

Yeah, whatever makes you happy. He's down to try anything but once again, if he doesn't like it, you probs won't be doing it again.

S - Stamina (how many rounds can they go for)

I'd say 2-3 long rounds(30mins - 1 hour?) and he's getting sleepy. He does prefer one long round where he makes you cum multiple times and ends with him cumming deep inside you. But if you want to go for 3-4 hours one night, he's fine with it.

T - Toy (do they own toys? Do they use them?)

Prefers not to but if it's a special occasion, he'll get the vibrator and other stuff out that one draw and you're in for a long night.

U - Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Depends on if you're being a brat. You're prancing around the house in a short and underwear or a super short skirt? Well, he's teasing you a fuck ton.

V - Volume (how loud are they)

As mentioned before, very loud. He loves to let you know how good you're making him feel and if that means using words, he will. But most of the time, it's a lewd moan or whimper.

W - Wild Card (get a random headcanon)

He LOVES when the boys walk-in on youse. So he makes sure to fuck you when he knows they're coming over. At first, you were a little embarrassed but then you found it hot asf.

X - X-Ray (let's see what's going on in those pants)

He's not the kind of tall guy that has a small dick. I feel like he's packing, probs the same as Slash, give or take a cm.

Y - Yearning (how high is their sex drive)

He's not horny 24/7 but always down to fuck. Like, if you need him sexually, he can get it up.

Z - ZZZ (how quickly do they fall asleep afterwards)

If it's a longer fuck sesh, he's asleep before you. If it's just a normal night, you fall asleep together, whispering sweet nothings to each other.

[shembaba]

Lexember 19

Nisārie, danisār, Nisāviel, danisāv [da.niˈsaː.ɾi.ɛ] (v.) | to love

This is a great word to have for showcasing transitivity in a conlang because in most linguistics papers it's only ever 'hit' and 'kill' and sometimes it's nice to be cheesy instead of violent.

I guess you wouldn't have to make 'to love' prototypically transitive. I could see a language having an experiencer-like construction as a main construction to express love, or maybe it's ditransitive or benefactive because love is something that you give to someone. I mean, defo go nuts with this, actually! But if you decide to make it a transitive verb, it's very nice to have because it means I can talk about some basic sentence structure with you:

Enio danisār. 2S-ACC 1-love-IMPFV I love you.

Shembaba is pretty strictly verb final, at least in its Classical register, so it's no surprise to see the object first. In fact, none of this is super surprising if you've ever looked at Latin. Sure, the subject marker on the noun comes before the verb stem but the TAM markers still come at the end. And it's also really western indoeuropeanly accusative.

The funny thing is that when Shembaba was still only meant to be a naming language I had originally wanted it to be Ergative just to contrast it more with Kevats (Dwarvish) which was sort of meant to be a polar opposite of Shembaba (Elvish) (though I'm sure I could've been much extremer). But I ended up making it accusative for a multitude of reasons:

I wanted my players to have a feeling of familiarity if they had ever taken Latin or Greek (or Old Church Slavonic but I don't know if any of my players ever even heard of it) – for better or for worse, i.e. including the daunting feeling of having to deal with declension tables if they ever looked at it (they of course never had to because I'm a reasonable dm that doesn't expect his friends to study a conlang lol).

I re-introduced conlanging into my life to have it as a relaxing hobby and thought that I'd treat myself to something I can intuitively understand because of my language background to save me some headaches. (Jokes on me, I delved much much deeper than I had expected with conlanging (though subconciously probably I knew that could happen), so I've definitely had my share of headaches).

I ended up marking agents in Kevats which was just about ergative-ish enough for me to justify staying off of it for Shembaba.

Ultimately, and perhaps also most importantly, the ergative never quite settled into Shembaba's grammar as it grew. It felt like an afterthought not like something that the language actually needed, so now I'm glad I got rid of it. Though, who knows, maybe I'll make an ergative daughter language of Shembaba one day.

Aaaand finally, because I mentioned the word ergative so often: I wanna make it clear that I'm one of those lunatics who don't believe that "Ergativity" makes up a natural class quite as neatly as "Accusativity". Situations where the patient of a transitive clause and the subject of an intransitive clause are marked differently from the agent of a transitive clause can arise through so many different constructions and circumstances and there's a lot of edge cases where it's hard to tell whether something is a case of 'Ergativity' or not. Accusativity, I feel, is waaay more straghtforward and uniform in comparison. I recommend reading DeLancey 2006 The Blue Bird of Ergativity if you wanna read the paper/essay that convinced me of that opinion.

[alaskan-wallflower]

im thinking thoughts…have them. stan and kyle as gym bros. i love them sm. (NOT A SHIP just dudes being bros)

it was kyle’s idea during a basketball off season to start going to an actual gym but he wanted an accountability buddy so he convinced stan to join with him. unfortunately stan doesn’t wanna go half the time (he is busy with warhammer 4k) and kyle has to drag him by his feet to the car because god forbid he miss a workout but also god forbid he have to ask some beefhead to spot him

kyle is so judgmental of the other guys in the gym that grunt and slam weights and snort creatine off their biceps, stan is like “just ignore it dude” and kyle is like “🙄oh my god they are so annoying and no one is impressed by them and yayayayaya” u know how he is.. he’s probably told one or two to SHUT UP and it worked cus he used the jersey powers.

they would encourage each other and kyle would never judge stan for anything. they do rip on each other a little for fun though and get into some friendly competition, it’s harmless. stan prefers working his upper body, kyle is all about legs. gotta keep that butt. stan refuses to do cardio because it makes his asthma act up but kyle is a runner. though i think he would prefer running outside rather than a treadmill, so he doesn’t do that at the gym.

kyle takes preworkout for MaXimUm GAInS (he was persuaded by some tiktok) and once stan took some but it made him so anxious he threw up. aw.

its just a thing that they do together and they bond over and it ends up helping stan’s mental health so much and improving kyle’s confidence. kyle unfortunately would get so confident that he would make some really cringe gym tiktoks. (you know that one glow up trend. the “16 missed calls” one. he would fucking do that) and even though stan is all strong now, shelley can still take his ass down with ease

ok thats all i got for now

y’know what? i can see this

used to go to the gym myself during the summer (had a bad habit of skipping out during school because i got busy-i’m old enough to get a membership now though) and i’ve experienced true gym bros. like the ones who come out with their dumb little towels and slam the weights. it’s annoying lol-i get where kyle is coming from

and i can see him dragging stan along. he tried getting the whole group to go but when he asked cartman to spot him he wouldn’t do it, and when he did he let go of the weight. kyle nearly broke his back. maybe even broke a rib from it. cartman didn’t care. kenny was trying but with how much he works he’s usually unable to go. and his work schedule night as well be a workout for him. so it’s just stan and kyle.

stan probably kinda just sits there and watches for the most part. he works his arms and legs but that’s about it. like you said, he can’t go too far because of his asthma. likewise, kyle can’t go too far because of his diabetes, which frustrates him immensely. he tries to push himself when it comes to working out so someone usually has to intervene before he has a diabetic crisis. kyle defo has that sleeper build tho

(side note and a bit off topic but i feel like kyle would technically be overweight, but not with fat. muscle weighs more than fat, and kyle is mostly muscle, therefore i feel like he would classify as overweight but he’s not like chubby or anything. cartman keeps insisting on calling kyle fatass and saying ‘kyle being overweight is karma’ but he doesn’t seem to get that the way kyle is overweight and the way cartman is overweight are vastly different)

anyway. great headcanons, i love love love!!

[luveline]

Hi, Jade!! This is probably not the place for this ask, so please feel free to ignore it. But I'm in need of advice or more like a listening ear and you're the one I thought could help. So at almost 24 years old I've never had a relationship, never even kissed and, to keep it short, I see myself as quite a loser in general, and I just met a guy that seemed like a potential romantic interest and he asked me on a date and my mind started racing anyway and I'm scared shitless of all the things that come with a relationship. I'm afraid if I don't address this, I will sabotage the whole thing, but I don't know how.

I'm sorry if this is tmi or not the place for such thing

hi honey don’t be sorry—

I get messages like this every now and then, of course not the exact same, but usually someone who feels down about themselves because of a lack of romantic experiences who’s worried it’ll reflect poorly on them when they do try to be romantic. I don’t personally think it makes you a loser, and anyone who DOES think you’re a loser is a jerk. I don’t mean to be annoying or bossy or rude to you and im sure you know yourself and im not saying YOU are a jerk, and you could even say there’s nothing bad about being a loser anyways, but also you’re not a loser and it’s no reflection of your heart that you haven’t been in a relationship or kissed someone. I think love is awfully difficult. I mean I think it’s great that you have thought to yourself about how you might sabotage this if you don’t address how you’re feeling. I’m not a therapist but I defo think that self reflection is great and it’s like the first step to your solution. I think that it’s natural to be nervous about stuff you’ve not experienced, like, what if he does want to kiss you, and what if you’re not a very good kisser yet! But I also think that anyone worth kissing won’t mind if you’re not very good at it to begin with, or that you’ve never done it before. The only love worth your time is a patient one, full of understanding (but obviously this doesn’t make it less terrifying!!) there are definitely videos you can watch about this, not just kissing but the intimacies of relationships, there are videos about how to hold hands! There’s no shame in not knowing something!! And every one person or relationship is different so it’s not like you’d be the only one learning, your partner will have to learn about you too

altogether I think you’re right in that panicking about this might sabotage it before it’s even happened, and adding weight to things can make them so scary when they aren’t. Milllions and billions of people have fallen in love before us without a manual and im sure they’ll do it again, but you’re not wrong to be worried either!! Depending on how worried you are, you could talk to a friend, the potential partner, you could even talk to a chat service or helpline. tl;dr — it’s okay to be scared about this, but you aren’t a loser, tons of people don’t know a thing about love at your age and you’ll learn as you go. there will probably be things you don’t like, but im sure there will be double good!!

I hope this helps, and I really hope none of it comes off as though im patronising or condescending you because it isn’t my intent at all. I’m not an expert but just from my own life experience this is what I think of it. I really hope things go well for you and that you make decisions that make you happy!!!!

[blubushie]

Hi! Hope things with the kittens keep improving, glad they have a foster mom. Hope you are able to get some sleep.

I have a question:

I want to get into doing my own maintenance on my car. I value independence and don't especially like going to a mechanic to get simple stuff done (although I see the value in someone much more experienced than I am). Do you have any advice on how to get started with that?

I have a 2007 PT Cruiser (he's blue, named Toby and I love him more than life and want him to live forever. I know he's not the best car, but I love him). I currently have a piece (windshield wiper switch went out, desert fried it) that needs to be put in (in PT Cruisers the switches on them tend to go out a lot, common problem). It's plug-and-play from what I've seen, although people recommended disconnecting the battery, so the airbag does not accidentally go off. Would this be a good place to start, or would changing oils be a better starting place?

I don't own much in way of tools beyond a very basic toolbox, and have very limited options in terms of workspace. Any advice is appreciated, you're the master of tools and cars.

Hope you are doing well, and that the days get less stressful

-📚

I'll admit I've never owned or worked on a car that new, so I'm actually not sure. If it's just a plug then it sounds simple enough, and if it's just a wiper switch then it's not like you're fucking with the boiler room. So yeah, I'd give it a shot (and defo disconnect the battery first). Here's hoping the ENTIRE faceplate doesn't have to come off to access the underplate cuz that's a pain even in my old truck.

Also, tip: take photos of everything you take off AS you take them off. Makes putting things BACK together much easier.

But also–

Learn to change your own oil, learn to check your own sparkplugs, and learn to change a tyre if you don't know already. The tyre one is most important. Tyre → oil → sparkplugs. Then it's checking transmission fluid, checking steering fluid if you have power steering, checking coolant in your radiator, and knowing what a good engine sounds like. And also knowing what a miss feels like in a cylinder (slight jerk of the wheel).

Also, if you got cash, get a 1/2in insert socket wrench and a stick of 1/2in insert sockets in assorted sizes.

You'll do fine anon. <3

[lullabyalikpoptarot]

thank you so much for doing these in depth readings even if its a lot to do it makes the idols seem very interesting people and there is so much more to them than their idol image, im so glad I asked for ateez readings from ur blog!

hongjoong defo likes being in charge or in control of things / others / himself, with the freedom he may want is he finding kpop too restrictive? I found sans to be quite sad or twisted? is there someone with higher power trying to harm his potential or is it about the frequent backlash he receives most out of all members? as I usually find in a lot of his readings that I have read so far they kinda give sad or chaotic vibes, seonghwa gives edward cullen vibes the moment u said masochist thats the first thing I thought of, I think there is another side to him that we do not know about.

yuyu is such a sweetheart he really is underrated, yeosang as well seems to have a very stable head which he needs to be doing kpop for this long and I like that about him its very attractive and in his past reflection I admired that he seemed to be aware of needing to take better care of himself (I think we all could do with learning that tbh), I also get what mingis saying because it always seems like it has to be constant drama in kpop in general so maybe he has experienced much trauma from it in the past or maybe too many things he doesnt like have bothered him previously or currently or in general just thinks its a restrictive uncreative environment that likes to stick to the same way of doing things. aww wooyoungs adorable, seems kinda sensitive as well maybe finds it hard to adjust to different people around him that arent his members but maybe the female staff could be a bit unfun to be around? jongho really doesnt like skinship I wish theyd stop enforcing it on him n just let him be he has plenty of talent to show for and I dont think he actually needs to add anythingmore to it than that tbh.

I think a lot of idols are limited to not doing certain things out of fear of the reactions they may get from it. please can u do this reading for skz next? thanks so much if u can!

Thank you for clarifying some stuff for me<333 Yunho is a sweetheart, love his energy. I find it funny that Jongho really wanted to point that out as his dislikes. Yeah, San's was wild. I like to see if I get more clarification on that when I do his more in-depth perspective reading, because that peaked my interest. I actually don't remember Wooyoung's reading at all out of all the members. Come to think of it, I never remember his readings, it is like he wants me to forget after I do it lol but thanks for this message, and yes, I will get to Stray Kids, but got a couple of readings to do, before I get to that, so might take a bit, but I will get to them.

[sunshineandviolets]

Can we get For good and fate for Mai, pretty please? 💜

hi!! thanks for the ask for my sweet yet sad girly hehe

For Good: Is there anyone in your OC's life who had an undeniable positive impact on who they are as a person? How did knowing this person improve your OC's life?

in the original verse, it was meeting and eventually befriending Aleisha during high school. Mai prior was rather a lonely kid and only really following around her sister and her sisters not so nice friends around. But having Aleisha there, standing up for her against assholes, admiring her fierceness and loyalty was defo a turning point and realisation on what friendship should be like, and that she deserved to be treated better.

She bonded with her over shared interests such as video games, music tastes and love for coding. Being around her made Mai feel more confident in herself and standing up for her own, and getting to enjoy her own interests. she was glad to finally find someone that saw her for her and not just as a clone of her sister and sibling. Even if she still had her own issues back at home, she found her rock - someone who she can count on to confide into.

in infamous, that person was Seven. those two clicked so naturally when back in school. in terms of positive impact, she found her person she can talk endless with , without feeling ashamed or embarrassed. who understands her and share similar tastes in music. was never the most confident in herself but esp in singing - i head canon that Seven was the reason Mai got into performing in the first place. Knowing the positive Seven had on her, made her even more sad and upset when that person, someone she considered her other half, wants nothing to do with her anymore. in a way Seven both had a positive and negative affect on Mai. Even if she did become more confident and embracing her passion for music... it also did make her rather co dependent on her. But that's something Mai hasn't realised yet. only sees the positives - refuses to acknowledge the flaws.

Fate: Does your OC believe in destined meetings? True love, soulmates, hearing the bells? Have they ever experienced this?

Original verse: When she was younger, Mai did believe in the whole destined meetings and platonic soulmate stuff. wanting so badly to find that family that gives her the love and attention that she never got. She creates worlds with her games and stories to tell of another time and place that's better. Like stated above, she would considered a destined meeting would be when she befriended Aleisha, Safiya and Nicola. Meeting them was hope that things are getting better after all.

However, over time her belief shifted in a less positive way. With Akira leaving and Reiko becoming colder/crueller , and just her family life crumbling before her. Mai struggled with the concept of destiny and thinks that happy ending is not meant for her , if all she left with is just tragedy. She started to know she couldn't truly escape, no amount of getting lost in video games and books could change the ending.

oc asks: relationships edition (still accepting <3)

[tradingmaps]

The Paris Review Guide to Becoming a Well-Read, Cultured, and Critically Thinking Person

Dear _________,  What kind of soulless freak could fail to answer your call? Your intelligence glows through your professed ignorance (as does the authenticity of “a very specific religious cult”). That sounds like an educationally less-than-ideal but, in other ways, fascinating childhood. My only piece of advice before recommending some titles would be: don’t fall for the inferiority/superiority racket. We’re not on a ladder here. We’re on a web. Right now you’re experiencing a desire to become more aware of and sensitive to its other strands. That feeling you’re having is culture. Whatever feeds that, go with it. And never forget that well-educated people pretend to know on average at least two-thirds more books than they’ve actually read.

A place to start is with Guy Davenport’s nonfiction collections, Every Force Evolves a Form, The Geography of the Imagination, and The Hunter Gracchus (with more pieces in The Death of Picasso). You’ll learn an enormous amount from these essays and sketches, but almost without realizing, because they give off the pleasure of great stories. Read the title essay in The Hunter Gracchus (about Kafka and the way symbols can take on a life of their own), and see if it isn’t as stimulating and creepy as the last good movie you saw.

Come up with a system of note-taking that you can use in your reading. It’s okay if it evolves. You can write in the margins, or keep a reading notebook (my preference) where you transcribe passages you like, with your own observations, and mark down the names of other, unfamiliar writers, books you’ve seen mentioned (Guy D. alone will give you a notebook full of these). Follow those notes to decide your next reading. That’s how you’ll create your own interior library. Now do that for the rest of your life and die knowing you’re still massively ignorant. (I wouldn’t trade it!)

Read My Ántonia, and then read everything else by Willa Cather. Inside her novels you’ll find it impossible to doubt that high enjoyment and extreme depth can go together. The most difficult art.

Read Isak Dinesen’s Seven Gothic Tales. I’m saying that randomly, because it seems right, and to approve the spirit of randomness.

If you get into a writer, go all the way and check out everything he/she has written. This summer I fell into a Defoe hole. Started with the major stuff, the best novels and the good journalism, and then read everything down to the poems and the tedious political pamphlets, since by that point I was equally interested in him as a human being and wanted to have as accurate a map of the inside of his brain as possible. His is one of the minds that helped shape the modern world—we’re literally still telling his stories—so there’s a vital interest. I read Maximilian Novak’s super-solid biography of him, Master of Fictions. That sort of questy reading ends up enriching your experience of each individual book and piece, and it lends a sense of adventure to the whole business, which after all involves a lot of lying down or sitting on your ass.

Borges and Denis Johnson—anything by either. Edith Wharton’s story “The Young Gentlemen.” (Random, random.) Robert Penn Warren’s All the King’s Men, and then his poems if you’re feeling spry. Find on the Web and buy an old paperback copy of the Robert Penn Warren and Albert Erskine–edited anthology Six Centuries of Great Poetry (a book for life). Read the next two things I’m going to read and then see how you like them: Grant’s Memoirs and Karl Ove Knausgaard’s My Struggle. Read Nabokov’s Speak, Memory and Joan Didion’s Slouching Towards Bethlehem.

Books that got me kick-started were the great modernist biographies, especially Hugh Kenner’s The Pound Era and Richard Ellmann’s life of James Joyce. Read those two books and you’ll have a decent-size grid on which to plot the rest of your reading. I’m somehow moved to spurt out, Stephen Greenblatt’s Will in the World. People have been writing about Shakespeare for half a millennium, and the very best of it just happened.

Ignore all of this and read the next cool-looking book you see lying around. It’s not the where-you-start so much as the that-you-don’t-stop. I was reading Phoenix Force novels until I was like thirteen. These days a lot of people I know are into Murakami. I should have said more novels. If it’s by a Russian, read it.

[hourglassfish]

I really love your account and your thoughts on the bear!

I really struggle with this discourse around romantic, platonic and sexual love within the bear, and between Syd and Carmy. I feel like it reveals a lot of the limits we place on 'love' as a concept, but also on how we understand Black women in culture.

Cus like - let's get it out the way - would we need to keep making this point if she was a white woman? Swap her and Molly Gordon around, watch the conversation change overnight! I feel compelled to defend the sydcarmy ship, because so much of what people say is Mammification 101, and the platonic soulmate feels like the embodiment the cultural idea imposed on Black women for centuries. I have been that person. It did me so much harm. Never again! (I am bemused that people find it inconceivable that these two hot, passionate, intense people, engaged in the deeply erotic work of feeding those around them and pushing their bodies to their physical limits might want to fuck. ESPECIALLY when they are framed the way they are. It's all extremely romantic and sexual, the more I watch them together under that table the worse it gets)

But on the other hand, I believe, deeply, that western cultures, particularly the heteropatriachal white ones, do not have enough language for all the kinds of love there are, and that it impoverishes us all spiritually. Because I don't believe those acts of love can or should or are restricted to the role of wife or romantic lover. They're defo not in queer frameworks - Alok V Menon writes beautifully about romantic friendship -

'i want a world where friendship is appreciated as a form of romance. i want a world where when people ask if we are seeing anyone we can list the names of all of our best friends and no one will bat an eyelid. i want monuments and holidays and certificates and ceremonies to commemorate friendship. i want a world that doesn't require us to be in a sexual/romantic partnership to be seen as mature (let alone complete). i want a movement that fights for all forms of relationships, not just the sexual ones. i want thousands of songs and movies and poems about the intimacy between friends. i want a world where our worth isn't linked to our desireability, our security to our monogamy, our family to our biology.'

and also -

'Friendship is the most sacred form of love. Home is less a physical location, more a good conversation with a friend. Take me there: the opposite of small talk. Romantic love is fickle and prone to spontaneous combustion. Friendship, it sticks. Keeps my feet on this earth. My head held high. Reminds me why I’m here.'

Donna Haraway speaks very explicitly about the love that exists between people that build something together, how deep and absorbing that can be - and I have felt and experienced that love, built a company with someone who became a friend, held hands as we walked to meetings we were nervous about, shared beds when we couldn't afford more than one hotel room at a conference, noticed we were finishing each others sentences, dressing similarly, building a shared philosophy as we funnelled huge amounts of ourselves into this thing we were building together that meant so much to and for us. There were moments where we were possessive and jealous of one another, we knew each other's families, she saw me at my very, very worst. I think that relationship was deeply loving, deeply intimate, deeply romantic in many ways - she came over once at 3 in the morning to make me mac and cheese. Her fiancee dropped her off! When we stopped working together, it was like a break up, and I grieved it, and there was no space for that grief, because the depth of that love isn't recognised in the society. So much of heteropatriarchy runs on the notion that there is one special person that will fulfill if not all, then at least the vast majority of our needs - but I don't think this is true, I think it's a myth that actively fucks us all over. It makes life cold and terrifying when you're single, and it can trap you in bad relationships if you fear they're going to be the only source of care. I think we can tesselate with one another in limitless ways, and that the exchange can be all sorts of things. There is a version of sydcarmy where their loving exchange is one where they both help each other come to terms with the respective griefs around their mothers, where Sydney supports Carmy in learning how to be a leader with the mental health presentations he has, and he supports her in her journey to a Michelin star, where they both figure out a model more like Kasama's (open 5 days a week for lunch service, 4 days a week for dinner service, with space to have a life), where together they make this massive chunk of their lives pleasurable. It could be one of the most meaningful, transformative relationships of their respective lives - and they can have other romantic and sexual loves outside of that, and it doesn't have to be an envious either or, or an abject extraction of labour. It can be a love of it's own.

that being said.

they should fuck

😉

“platonic soulmate” sounds, to me, an awful lot like doing all the work of being someone’s wife and then not getting all the benefits - someone to hold you when you’re sad or sick or just need a cuddle, someone to do half the chores, someone who makes you feel special, makes you laugh, takes care of you, listens to you and takes your feelings seriously, who takes your side, who puts the time and effort and love in to learn to fuck you just right

i’m not sure how it’s more “feminist” and “pure” to imagine a woman getting a raw deal like that. or why another man or woman (if she’s queer) would put up with her giving all of that wife-y care and time and passion (for minimum 14-16+ hours out of 24, six days a week) and energy away to a “platonic soulmate”

how is that more feminist than a woman wanting and then getting what she wants and all the pleasures and costs that come with it? why is only paying the cost and not getting the full deal inherently purer?

anyway here’s Wonderwall Sappho (translated by Anne Carson)

because I prayed this word: I want