#neither of them did anything about it tho
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[But there were some weeks that Roy moved a little slower, talked a little softer. Weeks that he poked at the food on his plate, listless and uninterested. Jason knew those were the times that the past reared up inside of Roy and awakened cravings that no food could satisfy.
It wasnât physiological, Jason knew. Heâd done plenty of research on addiction: first as a grieving child searching for ways he could have saved his mother, if only heâd known how, and then again when he and Roy had started living out of each otherâs pockets. It wasnât the ghost of heroin a decade past curbing Royâs appetite. It was just depression, as if that âjustâ made it any less pernicious.
They were in one of Jasonâs safe houses in Gotham, and the black cloud had been hanging over Royâs head for days. Now it was nearly two p.m., and Roy was still in bed. Neither of them were early risers, given the late night demands of the vigilante lifestyle, but this was late even for them.
Jason frowned into the open pantry. Roy had barely eaten anything yesterday. âNothing tastes good right now,â heâd said with a shrug when Jason had pressed.
Jason took out flour, baking powder, and salt, and got to work.
Maybe it was the smell that finally coaxed Roy out of his room, or maybe it was just good timing, but he emerged right as Jason was turning the first piece over to cook on the other side.
âIs that fry bread?â Roy asked, sounding bewildered.
âSit down,â Jason said. Roy obeyed, watching him in silence as the oil sizzled in the pan.
When the bread was golden on both sides, Jason laid it out on paper towels to drain and sprinkled it generously with cinnamon sugar. He carefully put a second piece in the oil before bringing the plate over to Roy.
âI canât believe you made fry bread,â Roy said, a little line between his brows. âI havenât had this since I was a kid.â
Jason knew that. Roy had reminisced enough times about burning his fingers on fry bread right out of the pan that Jason could picture it: little Roy, big-eared and sunburned, fingers and cheeks sticky with cinnamon sugar or honey as he angled for another piece.
But all he said was âYou gonna eat it or what?â]
IT SAID 500 WORDS OR LESS & I EXPLOITED THAT I KNOWWWWW i just love this entire part soooo much tho
Lol taxing the ask character count to the UTMOST, I respect it!
But there were some weeks that Roy moved a little slower, talked a little softer. Weeks that he poked at the food on his plate, listless and uninterested. Jason knew those were the times that the past reared up inside of Roy and awakened cravings that no food could satisfy.
My inspiration for Roy's depression comes mostly from this heartbreaking page in Outsiders #45 (2003 series):
(The other major source is, of course, his attempt at suicide by Killer Croc in RHATO.)
Roy is an extrovert who is very very good at masking, so the fact that he's even letting Jason see the depression - something he doesn't do for anyone else but Dinah and arguably Dick, although that was more PTSD than depression - is significant all on its own. He can let his guard down with Jason.
It wasnât physiological, Jason knew. Heâd done plenty of research on addiction: first as a grieving child searching for ways he could have saved his mother, if only heâd known how, and then again when he and Roy had started living out of each otherâs pockets. It wasnât the ghost of heroin a decade past curbing Royâs appetite. It was just depression, as if that âjustâ made it any less pernicious.
Jason, meanwhile, is going to quietly do research on addiction and recovery and never actually say anything out loud to Roy. (Fun fact: Ollie did this in canon. What's that thing about how we gravitate to partners who are similar to our parents?)
They were in one of Jasonâs safe houses in Gotham, and the black cloud had been hanging over Royâs head for days. Now it was nearly two p.m., and Roy was still in bed. Neither of them were early risers, given the late night demands of the vigilante lifestyle, but this was late even for them. Jason frowned into the open pantry. Roy had barely eaten anything yesterday. âNothing tastes good right now,â heâd said with a shrug when Jason had pressed.
Some of this may also be related to my own experiences with depression, as someone who usually loves food.
Jason took out flour, baking powder, and salt, and got to work. Maybe it was the smell that finally coaxed Roy out of his room, or maybe it was just good timing, but he emerged right as Jason was turning the first piece over to cook on the other side. âIs that fry bread?â Roy asked, sounding bewildered. âSit down,â Jason said. Roy obeyed, watching him in silence as the oil sizzled in the pan. When the bread was golden on both sides, Jason laid it out on paper towels to drain and sprinkled it generously with cinnamon sugar. He carefully put a second piece in the oil before bringing the plate over to Roy.
I've never actually had fry bread so I read a bunch of recipes and watched some YouTube tutorials, trying to find recipes from Navajo cooks especially. Now I really want it but I'm intimidated by deep frying.
I always write Roy with a sweet tooth, hence Jason going for a cinnamon sugar finish instead of savory. Also, I love writing Roy catching Jason doing An Affection and Jason retreating behind grumpily barking orders. NO ONE CAN KNOW THAT HE LOVES ROY. ESPECIALLY NOT ROY.
âI canât believe you made fry bread,â Roy said, a little line between his brows. âI havenât had this since I was a kid.â
Roy does NOT know how to respond to being taken care of. I love his relationship with Ollie but I always headcanon it as being pretty much a partnership of equals even when Roy was 10, i.e. they were equally immature. Ollie was his best friend but he was not cooking Roy's favorite foods.
Jason knew that. Roy had reminisced enough times about burning his fingers on fry bread right out of the pan that Jason could picture it: little Roy, big-eared and sunburned, fingers and cheeks sticky with cinnamon sugar or honey as he angled for another piece. But all he said was âYou gonna eat it or what?â
GREAT JOB, MAN OF MYSTERY, YOU HID YOUR FEELINGS IMPECCABLY.
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Iâm realizing now that my da world state is just. wow tragic romance huh
#hawke is special tho#gods most beloved (in a bad way) gets to live happily w his wife Isabella#rip to Zevran Iâm so sorry darling#dimitri I only feel kinda sorry for u bud like. you made the choice to pine#and then get nothing out of it#did dimitri and solas have feelings for each other? yes v much so#neither of them did anything about it tho#the doomed unfulfilled romance between themâŚâŚough#anyway Dimitri also has a world state w bull which is less of tragic romance#maybe the real middle aged yaoi was the two of them all along#I still find them v compelling there is a little clapping monkey in the back of my head that will never fully die#owen talks dragon age#I still have zero thoughts about rook#well I have a vague faction idea but. there are rocks between my ears#still a bit too ff14 pilled to think of a new oc#rotates the eyrie still rotates the eyrie still rotates the eyrie still
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Johnny: You know Spiderman better than I do??
Deadpool: I guess I do! Makes sense, since weâre a part of Team Red
Johnny: âTeam Redâ?
Deadpool: Ya know, me, Spidey, and Daredevil
Johnny: Well I wanna join, I should be on a team with him
Deadpool: OofâŚsorry Bluey, but thereâs no red in your costume, so you canât really be a part of âTeam Red,â ya dig?
Johnny:
Johnny: Iâm fire!
Johnny: Fire is red !!!
#made up dialogue by yours truly#donât care if itâs not in character or whatever this is the self indulgent blog#headache still here advil did nothing#Iâve been forsaken#johnny storm#the human torch#wade wilson#wade winston wilson#deadpool#team red mentioned#Spiderman mentioned#buildup to this is Spidey being incredibly worried about his identity getting out#so he doesnât even eat around people because that would involve rolling his mask up#but he eats around team red#other than the obvious reasons itâs cause he knows that neither one of them would try to track him down or anything#but even tho he trusts Johnny he feels like Johnny wouldnât drop it and would try to find out his identity#because Johnny doesnât fully get secret identities and doesnât understand why Spiderman as his friend wouldnât share that with him#also with the paparazzi always after Johnny thereâd also be high chances of someone getting a pic of Soidey with his mask partially off#if he ate around him#IN THIS AU#not saying thatâs how Spidey would see it in canon#just in my lil au#anyways Johnny finds out that Deadpoolâs seen him eat because Deadpool mentions Spideyâs fangs#not knowing other people donât know about them#cause this is my self indulgent blog so Spidey has fangs#cry me a river about it
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I was wondering if there are any rare happy ritsu moments in ur zombie au since hes always miserable I think,, like is he always miserable or is he happy/not miserable and feeling kinda good sometimes?
VWHDGDGD NO YEAH OFC HE'S HAPPY SOMETIMES im just horrible and enjoy putting him through misery
ive never been able to get a genuine smile to look right on his face in my art style either i think thats part of it. as ive said his face is just built to be mildly uncomfortable and bothered and i lean into it sm it's starting to get kinda funny
but yes ritsu is happy plenty! i think, canonically, he just seems like the type of person to me that tends to turn lemonade back into lemons. he's easy to scare and his first reaction to things is often Dread and Anxiety. he dwells on the negatives a lot and seems to be a "hope for the best, expect the worst," kinda guy, but there's a section in this post abt shigeo always loving the little things in life, and ritsu steadily learns throughout the journey on how to do that and how healing it can rly be. even if he had to grow up too fast during this whole thing and learn things a kid should never have to, the journey also gave him some good insight and lessons in other places! ritsu is smart, he figures it all out
in terms of little things here n there he's the happiest lil guy on the planet when he finds one of his favorite foodsâswings his legs while he sits and munches on a kitkat bar like he's got absolutely nothin in the world to worry abt. sometimes mob does smth funny that he laughs at; for the longest time i've had this silly image in my head of mob accidentally knocking down a bucket from a store shelf and it lands on his head and he just kinda stands there and makes noises.when the noises continue out of pure curiosity about the weird echoey quality it's giving them ritsu cannot help but lose it
besides tiny things tho, when tome comes around ritsu in general is a lot happier, just cuz he has somebody to talk to that will actually respond in some way. they're sorta reluctant partners in crime at first (at least on ritsu's end) but over time and over bonding they grow to rly like each other's presence. they bicker constantly but it's almost always fond eventually, and they shove each other and playfight until mob gets antsy enough to get worked up about it. rly, tome is a godsend to ritsu's mental healthâafter months and months of being effectively alone with his thoughts, he finally has another person to converse with. a person His Age, too!
tome is rly good at knowing when ritsu is thinkin himself into oblivion and she's Also rly good at being the most annoying girl on the planet to yank him outta that and replace any misery with Oh My God Get Off Me You Freak. she doesn't even do this on purpose at first, but over time she learns how to tell when he's thinking too hard and, ofc, she's grown attached and she cares, so she's as obnoxious as possible to lighten the mood
when they find reigen n teru, ritsu gradually gets Much happier still. now that he knows they're safe and the gang is finally back together (and now that there's an Adult present and he can relax a lil and let himself be taken care of) his stress levels r exponentially lowered. having teru back is another instant lift to his moodâim always a big fan of teru and ritsu friendship, and i think adding tome to their dynamic simply makes it more chaotic. truly a trio of the 3 most normal teenagers in existence which will surely bring nothing but good (reigen sweats offscreen)
actually this makes me feel bad for forever torturing him im gonna go draw happy zau ritsus brb ,.,.ok imback <3
#qktalks#anon#zombie au#tw guns#<- for that glock in the corner . sorry#actually it looks like he's at gunpoint in that one and just going teehee about it#he looooooves tormenting tome .and tome loves tormenting him. it's their favorite pastimes#i don't rly like the second one too much tbh the sleeves are weird but i think that's just the Nature of how poofy they can get#oh this is a great time to talk abt their dynamic. sorry.this ask isn't abt that.but now it is#so i realize that tome and ritsu ??? don't rly interact in canon at all. and neither do tome and teru . as a matter of fact#but consider. uhm.what ifthey did <3 GVYIEAV#like i said they're all So incredibly normal it'll make for a great time#^ genuinely i do think so actually. most of the time anyway#i touched on it a lil bit in recondite but i rly like the idea of mob ritsu tome and teru all being a friend group#teru would undoubtedly piss tome off sometimes she'd call him out on his bullshit#but like.in terms of the canon timeline i think post-mob teru would Totally listen to her#and take what she says abt How he is into consideration. he's trying to rebuild himself into somebody better#teru and ritsu already have a dynamic in canon but it feels pretty loose and it isn't fully explored at all#i think they work together rly well tho. there's no real evidence to the contrary iirc i think they work together in canon quite well#they think alike in terms of fighting#and in a setting like thisâ once teru is on the same page as ritsu on zombiesâ they're prolly a pretty damn good team#there's a lot of room for things to go wrong tho#if i had to sum it up rly succinctly it'd be: ritsu's motive is fearâ tome's motive is curiosityâ and teru's motive is power#what i mean by teru's being power is Not the pre-mob teru ''wanting'' to be powerful and unstoppable#i mean teru wants to have power over everything that is trying to hurt them#he doesn't Want to cower he wants to Fight tooth and nail#and i think ritsu's fear versus tome's curiosity and teru's drive of power conflicts a lot#ritsu is passive in the sense that he'll do anything in his power to avoid altercations with anything to order to keep mob safe#he isn't Active until something goes Wrong. and usually things go Wrong when teru and tome rush ahead#WOW sorry i went on a rant that was Completely unrelated to the fucking question. im at the 30 tag limit bye
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//saw an absolutely ice cold take that tweek shouldn't have a coffeeshop of his own when he gets older bc his parents & their coffee is what caused most of his problems, and i'm like... it's about retribution, it's about allowing him to run their business better than they did, to become more successful than they did without using underhanded methods and hurting people, it's about the despite, it's about letting him thrive despite, despite, despite
#misc :: ( ooc )#//i actually hc tweek as being genuinely passionate about coffee#//like DESPITE his parents there is comfort in the familiar; it's what he knows#//when he's having a better day mentally and his parents aren't down his throat about something#//he doesn't really MIND making drink orders for people#//tumblr has suuuuuch a huge problem with characters reclaiming the thing that hurt them tho#//even tho that's LITERALLY what i did with south park so ofc it was gonna get projected onto one of my sp muses LKJFDSKJDF#//tumblr is back on their ''there's only one way to be a victim and that's having a COMPLETE repulsion to the thing that hurt you'' bullshi#//it's his PARENTS he has a problem with; coffee is an innocent and has never done anything wrong in its life đ#//and yeah for a while he DOES avoid coffee bc he doesn't think he wants to work in a coffeeshop anymore#//and he struggles to find anywhere he fits for SO long bc he's trying to force things he... doesn't really like doing#//and on this blog it's craig who talks him into it like ''hey you LIKE making coffee; why are you not doing that?''#//and it finally clicks for tweek: ''oh yeah why AREN'T i doing that??''#//neither craig or tweek are ~perfect victims~ according to this bullshit website's definition of the term#//if they were they would never speak to each other again bc of tumblr's whole...#//...''you absolutely cannot forgive your abuser under any circumstances'' thing#//anyway tweek's future goth/alt coffeeshop where he offers the occasional free breakfast to homeless people is sexy send tweet#//i'm literally the only one i trust with tweek at this point i'm so serious#//like sorry i know literally EVERYONE has him on their blogs but i Get Him on a different level LKFJDSKJDF
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Oh wow I had no idea the website I'm using actually color codes which episodes are filler or not. Looks like I don't need to find that article then.
#all filler binge watch here i come đđđ#i did kinda get the urge to start watching the bort dub tho. but i still need to watch road to sakura and then The Last first#anyway RtN was awesome and i love iruka THATS NART'S DAD 2!!!! but i kinda dont have anything else to say about it after the end lmao#i guess if anything i just wish sasori had a line or two. i really wanted to hear jyb's sasori voice again đĽş#very funny that hidan had like. one scream laugh and that was it. of course thats all the dialogue he would get lmao#im assuming the LT akatsuki are kinda morally gray in terms of the mercenary work they do instead of just outright villains#considering kakuzu and hidan AND SASORI???? were still among them#i doubt sasori's personality changed much and clearly neither did hidan or kakuzu's. but being the LT at all means they must have#i mean. deidara was very fine with the work he was doing to help and tbh seemed more work oriented too#but maybe thats what happens when hes not bickering and arguing and hating uchihas so mucj#cuz he was fine working with. and i assume taking orders from itachi???#so i guess they do have differences that keep them in a smiliar line of work while remaining the same person at their core#but not like. AS fucked up????#very interesting to think about who they are in the LT. ALSO IM NOT OVER WHAT CHARASUKE MIGHT THINK OF MERCENARY ITACHI!!!#like. is he secretly worried about itachi's line of work???? did itachi have a falling out wit#*with their parents and left home to eventually become a mercenary??? is charasuke mad at him???#IS THE FUCKBOY PERSONALITY A COVER UP FOR HIS PROBLEMS WITH HIS POTENTIALLY STRESSFUL HOME LIFE DUE TO ITACHI'S LIFE????#I HAVE NEVER CARED ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIP MORE THAN I POSSIBKY COULD IN THIS MOMENT RIGHY NOE#FINALLY A VERSION OF THEM I CAN GIVE A SHIT ABIUT AND NOT JUST RELENTLESSLY HATE ITACHI FOR!!!!!#AND WE GOT FUCKING NOTHING FOR IT!!!!!!! FUCK#personal
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extra thoughts but sawashiro hurts my heart so like. yeah we know his character is like sad and tragic but like. REALLY think about it and like let it set in i swear he makes me want to rip my hair out he was just a boy... wish him happiness w like. a Labrador or smthn i dont know dog breeds
i can't really. call sawashiro 100% innocent; the abuse he went through during his adolescence is definitely sad and undoubtedly contributes to his behavior now, but uhhh he still put a newborn baby in a locker LMAO?
sawashiro's agony is purely a product of his own actions. at the very least he's trying to rectify the damage he did, and that's definitely better than him not having any remorse at all
#snap chats#sawashiro's perpetual crime and punishment is my favorite thing ever its so evil#like he Justifiably feels this immense guilt for the stupid shit he did- like he very much should feel awful forever#do we comprehend. putting a baby in a locker. like i joke about it all the time but Truly Honestly#fortunately (or not LMAO) masato survived but he was ultimately left damaged for half his life#lest we neglect to note that masato's condition specifically bred that hatred in him that made him wack as hell so.. uh oops#literal domino effect moment Sawashiro And Ikumi Didn't Get Sex Ed -> Japan's Most Vulnerable Are Being Oppressed pipeline#a set of stupid actions ultimately tarnished someones life. masato sucks but he didnt do anything as a baby to deserve that#in any case the severity of sawashiro's actions and his guilt is so integral to his character and aoki's character honestly#of course he's going to do everything for aoki now- but as a result now aoki's spoiled on that servitude yk#and aoki will never know why sawashiro was that dedicated all he knows is that he can get whatever he wants from him#and of COURSE. NOW we have a bratty 42 y/o LOL#you cant really feel bad for him because the punishment fits the crime- hell some might say its not enough#almost killing a baby is pretty indefensible. like i get why neither of them just gave the baby to an adult#yk TRAUMA and undoubtedly having a general distrust towards adults will influence your actions like that#but to put it in a LOCKER. at the very least they couldve just left it in a basket or somewhere someone could see it#but they put. a baby. in a locker. where it was supposed to wither away like the thousands of other coin locker babies#at most it wouldve been great if the adults in sawashiro and ikumi's lives didn't fail them but.. that aint the timeline we live in#FORGIVE THE RAMBLE i just. love this aspect of sawashiro it's so funny to think about#despite it all he should get a dog tho. for my amusement
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good morning thinking about the start of pt2 and the wizards looking like girlies with the sheer intention to annoy vincent. and akira only having non-comittal answers cuz theyre very aware they cant ensure it'll go great next time. thats not for them to decide. cue next time and its akira and twenty-one kids and akira standing there like ummmmmmmm sorry. like great guys! the one thing yall managed to agree on! (thinks its kind of funny) <-i imagine its similar to 2nd anni in how they end up stressed about the lack of progress in the meetings but arthur reassures them etc
#stardust speaking !#mhyk spoilers//#thinking about akiras 'well if vincent was nicer to them this wouldnt happen' all the time#<-guy who also doesnt have the greatest impression of vincent#'will the wizards behave nxt time' 'uuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh' 'sageđ đ đ đ ' ajdbsiejskwnkwksf#i miss 2nd anni meetings so bad. akira & the growing realization wizards cant hold meetings#the fact the western wizards are Both the ppl who go 'things r a bit tense. lets take a break:) so heres what happened the other day....'#and the ppl who go 'omg r u fighting?! u heard what he said are u just gonna take that?!' LIKE U GUUYYYYSSSSS#thinks its funny too cuz since chloe is the youngest of the 4 (by A Lotđ) & is a bit unsure about certain shenanigans seeing him Truly get#into it during that time was so funny. i adore chloe#i should reread those chs of 2nd anni....(and then ignore the restđ)#anyway i think that convo of the wizards vs vincent also brings out the 'ppl thinks the sage can control the wizards' and akira neither#wants to nor can. all they did was treat them with respect & love->theyre willing to listen to them#(realizing its the twentieth time im talking about this exact thing) đ#wait also thinking about the end of the visit and how all of them are very much around just hiding away.......#i dont have anything to say about that i just liked that part a lot. ough the dread that sets in in that part.......#arthur......chloe......................#grumbling wizards dont make promises they said#i might have the order wrong actually i havent actually reread those chs in a long time. soon tho. (dread)
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Eventually (Coriolanus Snow x Reader)
Word count: 6.7k
Summary: Coriolanus could appreciate irony, but the one person he desires more than anything wanting nothing to do with him pushes him to new territory
Tags: (18+), cw: noncon, dark!coriolanus, deeply implied stalker!coriolanus, unreliable narrator coriolanus (boy is delusional tbh, no one is doing more mental gymnastics than him), pre-mentor era, obsession, unprotected sex, choking (only for like a second), virginity status undisclosed but as I was writing I began to imagine this being the first time for both of themâitâs not even implied tho, so do with that what you will
A/N: a character as evil as him I couldnât conceive writing fluff for. heâs bad and guess what Iâm not gonna fix him, but I also canât make him not-hot so⌠hehe. please read the tags and proceed with caution <3
Misc masterlist + main masterlist
You wanted nothing to do with him, and that made him crazy.
No, if anything, you were the crazy one. Coriolanus hadnât done anything but try to be your friend, but you snubbed him without reason.
Coriolanus did a good job at keeping the financial situation of his family a secret. No one knew, and he doubted you were an exception. Yet, it was as if you looked down upon him.
Although, youâd grown fond of Sejanus, so even if you did know, status wasnât a concern of yours. It was something he admired, yet questioned all at once. There had to be a reason for your dismissal. A reason you couldnât bring yourself to even offer a smile back. Itâs not like he was asking a lot.
Itâs not like he wasnât trying, either. Heâd gotten used to trying to make people like him, to see him as better than he was, but it was never this hard. It wouldâve been so much simpler if you just told him to his face what your problem was, but whenever he came around, mostly when you were talking to Sejanusâthey were friends, it was the perfect excuseâyou just went quiet. Youâd greet him, make no effort to continue the conversation, then excuse yourself.
All Coriolanus wanted to know was why.
âYouâre watching her again,â Clemensia whispered to him, eyes flicking between him and the paper in front of her.
They were class partners, but Coriolanus was beginning to think he spent too much time with her.
âWho?â
Clemensia let out a small chuckle, mocking him. The professor at the front of the class looked up, and Coriolanus quickly looked down at his paper, taking his eyes off of you.
âYouâre too obvious,â she muttered, a smirk in her voice. âMaybe thatâs why she doesnât like you. Because you stare at her too much.â
She didnât get a responseâit didnât deserve one. Coriolanus questioned why he ever told her anything. She made him sound like some sort of stalker. Which, for the record, he was not.
His eyes managing to find you frequently wasnât a crime, and neither was crossing your path. Maybe it wasnât a coincidence most of the time, but itâs not as if he was harming you by watching you. He doubted you noticed anyway.
Seeing you nearly everyday had been enough to keep him sated, but then Sejanus started talking about you. Through no fault of his own, Coriolanus learned things about you. What he came to know made him curious to discover more. Even if you did not seem keen to let him.
Being content with what he had didnât keep its appeal for long. Not when you were right there, your presence taunting him. Making him want what you would not let him have.
âYou just need to talk to her, Coryo,â Tigris told him one evening, when he revealed everything to her. âNot in class and not with Sejanus. Just you. Let her know the real you and I promise sheâll like what she sees.â
Coriolanus took his cousinâs advice to heart. She was much more empathetic than him, she had to be onto something, right?
Everything changed when Coriolanus sat across from you at a study table in the library.
As beautiful as you were from a distance, being up close was something else entirely. He could admire you for hours and never get tired.
You looked up at him, he smiled and said hello just like Tigris advised. The smile you returned seemed forced, and you ignored that he had spoken.
It upset him, but not as much as when you got up and walked out. It was the last straw. Coriolanus was following you into the hall before he could think better of it.
He caught up to you, dropping his hand to your shoulder to make you turn around and face him. When you did, you looked surprised. That wasnât what made Coriolanus hesitate, but the realization that he had never been this close to you before. Not even sitting across from you compared to touching you.
His heart skipped a beat.
âWhat do you want?â you questioned, a level of annoyance he thought to be unearned in your voice.
His heart started again.
âHave I done something to you?â Coriolanus confronted you, feeling a familiar sense of agitation creep over him. He had to know. âTo make you feel such distaste for me?â
âI donât dislike you, Coriolanus,â you replied, calmly after recovering from your initial shock. âIâm just⌠indifferent to you.â
The answer confused him more than it did enrage him. He smothered the latter feeling as he observed you.
âYouâre⌠indifferent,â he stated, not asking. His feet shifted beneath him. It hurt, for some reason. âWhy?â
Your eyes narrowed ever so slightly, studying him. It was the same way youâd look at your books when you were struggling with a subject, lingering behind in class or the library until a triumphant smile crossed your face.
Only, that smile never came. Your expression just faded back to normal.
âYou shouldnât put so much weight on what other people think of you,â you advised, stepping closer to him. His breath caught in his chest. You smelled sweet, like flowers. âEspecially not someone you donât even know.â
It was then, he realized, you hadnât moved closer to him with purpose. Youâd been on your way moving past him. His eyes focused on your back as you walked away, figuring out what to say.
âIâd like to know you,â he announced earnestly, verbally trying to pull you back. âIf youâd only give me a chance.â
You slowed to a stop, looking over your shoulder. Coriolanus felt as if he was on display as your eyes raked over him, determining for yourself his sincerity.
âYouâre friends with Sejanus, arenât you?â you wondered. It wasnât what he expected, but Coriolanus nodded. You sighed, which irked him to think it was pity. âIf youâd like to join us for lunch I wouldnât be against that.â
âIâll see you then,â he said, but you were already turning away. He kept to himself that he had already tried in the past.
His friend was nice. Too nice for his own good, truthfully. It wasnât as if Sejanus completely abandoned him the moment he befriended you. It was more like he split his time, attending to both friendships. The only thing Coriolanus held against him was that he never tried to reintroduce the two of you. Maybe even put in a good word.
At lunch Coriolanus found you and Sejanus quickly, he knew where you liked to sit.
âHey, Coryo,â Sejanus greeted, smiling. âAbout time you decided to join us.â
Coriolanus put on a smile as he sat down. âWell, I wouldâve sooner, but I wasnât sure I was welcome before.â
The comment made you smirk, in on the joke as Coriolanus looked at you.
âWhoâs to say you are now?â you sarcastically replied, as if you hadnât been the one to invite him.
Well, âinviteâ was being generous, but he still seized the opportunity nonetheless.
âIgnore her, she canât help herself,â Sejanus said with a chuckle, used to your humor.
This time, when he tried to talk to you, you engaged. In between discussions of classes and assignments, Coriolanus had to dodge your quick wit.
He liked the challenge, and the next day, he went back for more. Even walked right past Clemanisa and Arachne, who tried to invite him to their table with Festus. You were waiting for him.
He noticed you and Sejanus already talking.
When he sat across from you, you raised your brows. âSeeking refuge?â
Before he could ask what you meant, you nodded your head towards the girls heâd left behind.
You knew about his friends?
âYou could call it that,â he replied, a smile starting to appear.
You nodded and hummed.
âWell, what are your qualifications?â
âExcuse me?â
âYou joke too much, Y/N,â Sejanus lightly scolded you, interrupting whatever path you were going down, which made you laugh. âHeâs going to think you donât like him.â
âHe knows I donât mean anything by it,â you assured, looking at Coriolanus. âIâm just trying to figure him out.â
Your tone was filled with confidence, but your face⌠Coriolanus wasnât sure how to place your underlying expression. You had a shield up, he knew that much, but what did that have to do with him? Were you trying to figure out if you could let it down for him? Or something else?
âOf course,â Coriolanus answered, not taking his eyes off of you. âIâm an open book.â
âAre you, now?â You folded your arms on the table. âYour friends love to gossip, and I donât think Iâve heard that about you.â
âItâs not my fault if they donât know how to read,â Coriolanus quipped, proud of himself for being so quick.
None of his friends had wronged him, but the joke at their expense was worth it for what followed after.
He made you laugh. Not just smile, but truly laugh. It was exactly what he wanted, and it actually worked. Awe didn't begin to describe how it felt.
Joining your table for lunch became the best part of his day. Sometimes he forgot Sejanus was even there, far too eager to see you. He saw you all the time, of course. Watching you was a habit he had yet to break, but this was different. You were aware of his presence, and he was able to speak to you. It didnât matter that you still seemed weary, it was enough.
Even if you didnât like him, you still had conversations with him, so that was something.
Sometimes, if you were deep in a discussion, debating ethicsâyour favorite topicâit would continue beyond just the table. Heâd walk you to class, wanting to hear your voice just a second longer.
âI want to meet this girl,â His grandmother declared one night, after Coriolanus drifted to the topic of you over dinner. Heâd been doing it more recently.
Tigris gave him a look, a light frown. There was no way to do that without you coming to his home, and he wasnât going to let that happen.
âLet Coryo decide that, Grandmaâam,â Tigris insisted, patting the older womanâs shoulder.
âWell, he has feelings for Y/N,â she argued, looking at Coriolanus. He used your name enough that she remembered it. âAnd she likes him tooâdoesnât she?â
Coriolanus gave a tight smile. âYes, she does.â
Keeping up appearances.
âWell, that settles it, then,â Grandmaâam decided.
âI think itâs time you get to bed,â Tigris intervened, getting their grandmother up from her chair.
Later, when they were alone, Tigris asked him, âDoes she even know how you feel about her?â She knew him too well. He took too long to answer. âYou should tell her. From what youâve told us, you two should be together. But it wonât happen unless you make it known how you feel.â
Coriolanusâs dreams were filled with you, as they usually were, but something was different the morning he woke up after the conversation with Tigris.
All he had to do was prove himself to you, and he knew that now.
Coriolanus found you in the library a lot, often pretending to stumble upon you. This time, he didnât put on a facade.
âI thought Iâd find you here,â he acknowledged, sitting down beside you. Often heâd sit across, but he was testing the waters. Seeing if you were put off by the proximity. âStudying for Featherlyâs class?â
âIâm terrified for his test,â you confided, rubbing your temples as you hunched down at your book. âI feel like my mind has no room for anything else. Iâve memorized nothing.â
With a sigh, you sat up and pushed the book away.
âI can help you,â Coriolanus insisted, reaching for the book. He read over the page you were on, knowing heâd already perfected the subject. âYou shouldâve asked for me sooner.â
Maybe it was a little spiteful, but he hadnât purposely meant it to come out that way. You still noticed it, taking your book back.
âIâm not asking for your help now, Coriolanus,â you muttered, looking at him out of the corner of your eye.
You were the last of his friends to still call him that. Most everyone else called him âCoryoâ. Not you. But you were stubborn in many ways. This too, apparently.
âI didnât mean anything against you,â he said lightly, even chuckling a little. It was forced, but he wanted to show he wasnât being that serious.
Using your own words on you did not have the desired effect.
âMmmhmmm,â you hummed.
Coriolanus tilted his head down, trying to get you to meet his gaze. You gave in, facing him, looking unamused.
He wanted to wipe that look away, but didnât know how. If he could just make you like himâ
Suddenly, your watch began to beep.
âTest time,â you grumbled, taking back your book and getting up.
Coriolanus followed you down the hall and into class. The tests were already on the desks, waiting. You two were earlyâhe noticed that because of the clock on the wall.
He walked you to your seat and wished you good luck. To his surprise, you offered the same in return. Then, he went to his own. Other students filed in quickly after, professor Featherly being the last to enter the room.
The professor declared, âBegin,â then sat at his desk in the middle of the room and began to read.
The test wasnât easy, but Coriolanus knew what he was doing. One look around the classroom and he saw that wasnât the case for most other students. He felt a sense of pride, until his gaze landed on you. You were one row down and four seats to the left. Heâd counted before. You were fiddling with your pencil, struggling to come up with what to write down.
While he couldâve been the first to finish, Coriolanus let other students turn their tests in before him. An hour passed by, but it moved quickly.
There were only a few students left when you finally got up. You radiated an anxious energy, much like the others, but Coriolanus didnât care about the others.
Clemensia stuck her hand up in the air, waiting for the professor to notice her, distracting Coriolanus briefly. When the professor looked up and noticed her, Clemansia got her wish.
Coriolanus considered himself lucky, convincing himself with his own mantra frequently. As he watched you leave your test on Featherlyâs desk and rush from the room, he realized how he could help you.
He quickly marked down the rest of his answers, having stalled so he could leave when you did. The professor was making his way away from the desk, while Coriolanus got up and went in the opposite direction.
With a swift, hard kick to the leg, the professor's desk wobbled and papers spilled off on the other side. It looked like an accident.
Featherly looked over his shoulder at the noise.
âSorry,â Coriolanus apologized, kneeling down behind the desk to collect the papers.
Without anyone watching, he found your test. He had no time to change the written questions, but he made quick work of erasing and re-doing the multiple choice, with his own test and knowledge as reference.
He had to give you credit for getting a decent amount correct, but not enough for a passing grade.
When Coriolanus fixed that, he stacked together the papers and placed them back on the desk and exited.
Everyone was waiting in the hall. Against tradition, the professor graded tests directly after and would call students in to give the results. It was time consuming, and kept everyone on campus after hours, which was against the rules, but perhaps heâd gotten some kind of exception.
You were leaning against the wall opposite of the classroom, talking to some girl from the classâCoriolanus didnât bother to learn her name. He wanted to go to you, but Sejanus got to him first instead.
âHow do you think you did?â
Coriolanus shrugged, looking down at his friend. âFine, I think.â That was the humble answer, right? âHow about you?â
âNot perfect, but I passed.â
Clemensia trotted out then, a confident look on her face.
âWhat was so important you had to ask during the test?â Coriolanus couldnât help but wonder. Sheâd unknowingly helped him, after all.
âJust clarity on a question, wanted to make sure I got it right,â she answered with ease.
âAnd did you?â
She gave Sejanus a look.
âYes, of course.â
The last person exited the class, and professor Featherly closed the door. And so the grading began.
One by one, the professor called people in. There was no method to the order, it seemed likely he shuffled the papers or chose which one to grade next at random.
Time passed, Coriolanus didnât know how much exactly, but it was beginning to get dark outside. Tigris would be worried until he got home, but sheâd understand. His studies came first.
Eventually, Coriolanus realized it was dwindling down to be just you and him left. He was lucky today.
The third to last student was in the classroom, leaving you across the hall from one another.
You pressed your lips together before speaking.
âDo you think you did alright?â
The corner of Coriolanusâs lip twitched up at the sound of your voice.
âYes, I think so,â he answered humbly. âWhat about you?â
You let out a self deprecating laugh. âWhen I said I was terrified, I wasnât being dramatic.â You sighed, accepting your fate. âIâll have to do perfect on the next one, I guess.â
âI can help you with that,â Coriolanus offered.
The smile he gave you spawned a mirror reaction. He knew he was charming, he had to be, and this time you actually seemed receptive to it.
âMaybe you can.â
The sound of a door opening made Coriolanus turn. Arachne was leaving, a smug look on her face as she thanked the professor.
Then the door closed, and the professor graded another test. There were only two left.
âI wish he wouldnât do it like this,â you filled the silence. âThe others donât make us wait like this.â
âIt builds suspense, I suppose,â Coriolanus mused. âKeeps us on our toes.â
âThatâs not something I need right now.â
âAt least you have good company,â he noted flirtatiously. He couldnât help but grin at his own words, especially when you bite your lip to keep yourself from smiling.
âCould be worse, I supposed,â you retorted.
More time passed. The door opened again.
âCoriolanus Snow,â the professor addressed him next. âYour turn.â
As expected, Coriolanus did close to perfect. One answer off. Best in the class.
Back in the hallway, when he was done, Coriolanus waited with you. He didnât announce he was staying, he just returned to his spot against the wall.
âDonât keep a girl waiting. How did you do?â you asked, departing from the wall.
Coriolanus wondered where you were going, but then, you stood next to him, leaning back against the wall. There was still an arms length between the two of you, but it was something. Youâd gone to him for once.
âYouâll think Iâm full of myself if I tell you,â he teased lightly, which made you roll your eyes.
âMaybe I already think that, so just tell me,â you insisted.
The comment made him falter.
âBest in the class,â he divulged.
You almost looked impressed. âGood for you.â
The door opened.
âY/N L/N, youâre up.â
âWish me luck,â you said under your breath before following Featherly in.
âGood luck.â
Coriolanus waited for you, just like before. He tapped his foot. The professor didnât actually go over the answers, he just told you the grade. Youâd have no way of knowing what he did for you, but heâd be there to share in your excitement when you discovered how well youâd done.
Or, how well heâd done for you.
Not long later, you and the professor exited the class together.
âWasnât expecting you to still be here,â Featherly addressed Coriolanus. âYou should get going. Iâll see you in class tomorrow.â
Then, he left you and Coriolanus alone in the hall, presumably leaving the building.
âSo,â Coriolanus began with a smile. âHow did you do?â
âHe asked if Iâd been studying with you. Apparently we had all the same answers,â you told him, crossing your arms. âExcept when I asked him to show me my examâwhich I did great on, apparentlyâI saw answers circled that werenât mine.â
Coriolanus hadnât expected you to find out so quickly, but a part of him was relieved you did. It meant he got to take credit, and he could show you that he really did want the best for you.
Or, he could always lie.
âYou weren scared of failing,â he finally admitted. He offered a sympathetic smile. âSo I helped.â
âNo, you cheated!â you accused, causing his eyes to go wide. âYouâve implicated us both. If anyone finds outâŚâ
âDonât be so loud,â he hissed out in a whisper, stepping closer to you. The professor could still be in the building. He doubted anyone else would be. âI just wanted to help you, okay? You needed it, so Iââ
âYou helped, I get it. But I didnât ask you to do that for me, Coriolanus. I have never asked you to do anything for me,â you sneered, somewhere between offended and betrayed.
He saw the way you scanned his faceâhis eyes. The pleading was beginning to seep through.
A wave of realization washed over you before he even opened his mouth.
âYou didnât have to ask me to,â Coriolanus said meaningfully, stepping closer to you. âI wanted to. I wanted to help you.â
You back hit the wall. The hallway was so empty it seemed as if the subtle sound still echoed.
âIâd do anything for you, donât you get that?â
The sound of a large door closing carried from a distance.
Coriolanus reached for your face, wishing he could take away the concern that riddled your expression. Instead, he brushed a stray piece of hair from your face.
You swallowed. Why did you look so nervous around him? You were friends now, werenât you? You never looked scared around anyone else. Why him? Why now? His own questions frustrated him.
âWeâre not supposed to be on campus after hours,â you said calmly. It was the same tone you used when you first described your indifference to him. Coriolanus thought about that moment a lot. âFeatherly already left. We should leave before we get caught.â
The corners of his lips twitched down.
âWeâre still talking, though, arenât we?â
You let out a shallow breath. You had no reason to look as scared as you did.
âI think weâre done.â
Coriolanus thought back to his cousinâs advice. He couldâve followed it better if sheâd written it down, perchance.
âYouâre so beautiful, you know that?â Coriolanus pondered, smiling to himself at the sight of you. âYou caught my eye from the beginning and IâI couldnât figure out why you wanted nothing to do with me.â You watched him carefully. He wondered if you could sense the dejectedness brewing. âDid you see something in me? Is that it?â
âI donât know,â you admitted under your breath. âPeople like you, and youâve been making an effort to be my friend, so I donât know what told me to stay away from you, but something did. Iâve tried to ignore it, but I stillâŚâ you swallowed. âI donât know.â
The confession shouldâve been a relief. Thatâs what he imagined it would be. That you would admit the truth, and he could fix whatever misconceptions you had.
Coriolanus did not know what to do with âI donât knowâ.
Staring down at you, Coriolanus noticed your back was against the wall. Literally. He hadnât meant to put you there, but he had.
It got you to listen, didnât it? Heâd gotten an answer?
âCan we start over?â Coriolanus suggested, even throwing in a smile that would charm most anyone. It worked on you before. âWe can forget all this mess.â
You blinked. You didnât believe him.
For most people, he wouldnât simply let numerous slights go, but for you, if it would fix whatever this was, if it meant the two of you could have a real chance, then heâd overcome his instinctsâold and new.
âIâm afraid my memory is too good for that,â you finally said, looking up at him with defiance.
Defying what, was the question. It wasnât as if you were enemies.
The thought made his jaw clench. He let out a laugh that was sharp. It lacked any sense of humor.
âWhy canât you just accept my apology?â
Your brows arched up, questioning him.
âThat was supposed to be an apology?â
âYes,â he confirmed. âBut itâs not as if I owe you one.â
âI never said you did. I never said anything. You took it upon yourself to insert yourself into my life and now you are not happy with your place in it. Youâve overstepped, and you need to let me leave.â
Coriolanus frowned.
âYou act like Iâm keeping you here by force.â
You look up at him, silently telling him you believed he was.
That frustrated him further.
In an act that jarred even him, Coriolanus pressed his palms against your shoulders and pushed you back against the wall when you tried to move away.
âThis is force,â he declared sternly, leaning down, making you maintain his gaze.
Everyone liked control, but he hadnât used it in such a physical way before. It thrilled him in an odd way.
âGet your hands off me.â
âWhy should I? You already think so poorly of me, why not let you be right?â
You moved again then, trying to catch him off guard and squirm away. But Coriolanus was quick to shove you back against the wall.
âWe can still start over. If you would give me a chance, I think we can be good together.â
He let one hand rise to rest on your cheek. Your skin was so smooth. He inhaled deeply, resolve slipping further as his eyes fell to your lips.
If Coriolanus could just prove it to you, he was sure youâd understand what he meant.
He leaned in cautiously, gauging your reaction. You didnât flinch away. You tilted your chin up, even. That familiar skip of his heart returned.
Coriolanusâs lips only just brushed against yours before you reacted. He had a second of relief before you brought your knee up, jabbing him in the lower stomach, although he doubted that was where you were aiming. It was still enough of a shock to throw him off his game. He stumbled back, and in a flash, you were gone. You were running down the hallâtrying to get away from him, like usual.
Only this time, he didnât feel like letting you go.
Something he had slowly come to learn was when he wanted something, it wasnât just going to be handed to him. Vying for the Plinth Prize highlighted that, alongside his childhood.
He caught you easily, hand snapping out like a snake to grip your arm and yank you back to him. You collided with his chest. It was like you werenât even trying. Not really. Just toying with him.
âAm I a game to you?â Coriolanus hissed into your ear, wrapping you in his arms. âSomething for you to play?â
âI havenât done anything to you! I hardly even know you!â you defended, but it just made him hold you tighter.
âI know you,â he implored, fighting against your squirming. He lost balance and when you fell to the ground, you took him with you. Coriolanus got you onto your back, sitting on your thighs, gripping your wrists in his hands to keep you from swinging at him. You let out panicked breaths, staring up at him. âI know more than you think.â
Something about the position made the front of his pants begin to feel constricting.
âCoriolanus, youâre frightening me,â you enunciated, as if trying to reason with him.
âIâm not being unreasonable,â Coriolanus grit out, working to maintain his composure.
âWhat?â you questioned, brows pinching together, a deep frown on your face. Confused and scared. Coriolanus used to feel that way. âJust let me go.â
âAnd then what? You go back to ignoring me? No I canât⌠I canât go back to that. If you just give me a chance I can show you.â
Coriolanus didnât know what happened next.
Tigris told him it was like he left his own head, sometimes. She said heâd get so caught up, he wouldnât notice things. At the time he had laughed. If anyone stayed aware, it was him.
It wasnât that he left his head, but got lost in it. Lost in his own inner monologue to realize what he was doing.
In this case, what heâd done.
Far too busy thinking of ways to convey everything he wanted to say to you, how to make you understand, visualizing your reaction, heâd already acted.
Maybe there were two people living in his mind. One with a conscience, one without. Or perhaps that was just something he used to justify his less than decent actions. An excuse. Heâd never let himself know the truth. Not really. Not yet.
What he did know was what he could see. You, beneath him, clothes torn from your body. The only thing left was a shirt. Too much effort, apparently. Your wrists were snatched together in one of his hands.
The power stirred something within him.
One might say he was out of excuses when he reached for the zipper of his pants, but no one else was here, were they?
Your mouth was moving. Speaking. Maybe even yelling. Looking at him, looking around the room. He couldnât hear a sound but his own heart thumping in his ears paired with his own eager breaths. Was that normal?
He moved, wedging himself between your legs, nudging them apart to make room for himself.
âItâs just us,â Coriolanus spoke, loud enough to hear himself. You flinched. âNo oneâs here.â
He gripped himself, stroking his cock, lining himself up with your entrance. His patience was running incredibly thin.
Tears pricked in your eyes. You stopped struggling at his words, accepting it for what it was. Good.
âWhy are you doing this?â
He heard your voice clearly, that time, despite the strain in your tone.
Coriolanus observed you carefully, squeezing your wrists together in one hand and lovingly caressing your hip with the other.
He finally understood the answer youâd given before. He found it fitting now.
âI donât know.â
To him, it was the truth.
The moment Coriolanus pressed himself inside of you, it was as if the rest of the world disappeared. After so long of wanting you in every way, shape, or form, this was long overdue.
âYouâre perfect for me,â he breathed out. Coriolanus gave a shove of his hips, his gaze falling to your mouth as an unwilling yelp slipped out. âI knew you would be.â
You were tight, too tight, even. Unwelcoming. Yet still, you felt like home.
His handâthe one that was on your hipâdrifted between your legs. He found your clit, running his thumb in small circles, trying to ease the pressure you mustâve been feeling.
Coriolanus did not want to hurt you.
He looked into unfocused eyes. Where were you? Were you trying to be somewhere else?
He let your hands go. You didnât move to slap him or shove him or anything. You were learning.
He leaned over you more, reaching for you face with his now free hand, and ran his thumb over your cheek, encouraging your gaze to actually meet his. He smiled softly when you did. You got more beautiful every second he looked at you. It was even better when he could see you were present.
Coriolanus found himself unable to resist it, so he gave into the urge to press his lips to yours. A real kiss, this time.
Your lips were softer than heâd imagined. You made a noise when his tongue tasted your mouth. His kiss was hungryâaggressive, even. But heâd waited so long he didnât know how to contain himself.
Your body reacted to his touch. Your bent knees inched up his hips to accommodate him, and your walls were becoming slick, accepting the invasion.
A deep moan escaped him, cock throbbing inside you at the feel. The sound was muffled by his lips pressed to yours, but he still felt vulnerable, giving himself to you in this way.
Coriolanus pulled back from the kiss, only to rest his forehead against yours and breathe out a small puff of air from his lips.
âIâve never wanted anything as much as I want you. Not even the Plinth Prize,â he confessed in a whisper.
âWhatâs the difference?â You finally spoke, voice wavering. âYou have to earn the prize?â The accusing tone felt like a slap.
âYou donât know what youâre saying,â Coriolanus muttered, eyes boring into yours. âYouâll see.â
He gave you one more searing kiss before moving his hips.
A gasp that morphed into a moan clawed its way up your throat. The sound was like music to his ears. He wanted to hear it again.
He began to move more consistently, finding a pace that suited him. Rough enough to keep you present, but not so harsh as to hurt you. He wanted you to enjoy yourself, even if you were trying to avoid it.
Still figuring you out, Coriolanus found your sweet spot with a hard thrust, causing you to wince. Instinctively, you tried to push him away, just like you had before, not wanting to surrender.
You stilled when you felt his hand. He hardly realized how heâd reacted until he felt your throat bob beneath his palm.
Coriolanus retracted his hand, like your skin and shot a volt through him. His movements slowed to a stop.
âIâm sorry,â he apologized earnestly, brushing the hand through your hair gently. âI shouldnât have done that.â
Your chest heaved as you breathed shaky breaths through your nose. Your lips pressed together in a line.
You werenât going to dignify him with a response. In a way, he understood.
Coriolanus locked his arms under your body and in a surge of strength, pulled you from the ground and into his lap. He hugged you against him, nuzzling his face into your neck.
âForgive me,â he requested softly.
You shifted in his lap, adjusting yourself to find comfort in the new position. You did not speak.
He slammed his hips up, forcing a gasp from your lips. That was something, wasnât it?
You pulled back, and he did it again. And again. And again.
You fell against him, jarred by the change in his movements as he thrust into you. He liked it, feeling you in his lap, your chest against his, leaving you no choice but to hold onto him.
His lips latched onto the skin of your neck as he moved, barring his teeth and nipping the skin. You reacted as if he were venomous, straining away from him, but heâd left his mark.
You could pretend all you wanted that you didnât like him, but Coriolanus could feel your body reacting to his. He could feel the way your walls squeezed around him, drawing him in, and how your body quivered as he pushed you closer to your edge.
âJust let go,â Coriolanus whispered, holding you tighter. He cradled the back of your head against him as he moved inside of you. Soothing and rough at the same time. âItâs okay, I know you want to.â
âShut up,â you hissed into his neck, hands finding his chest.
Were you really going to try and get away from him? It was a bit late for that.
Coriolanus moved his hand between your bodies, finding your clit with the pad of his thumb, speeding along the process.
âWhat was that?â he taunted, feeling your legs start to shake.
A moan tore from your throat as you came around him, body slumping against his as he shoved himself deeper inside you. He wanted to feel your body tensed around him.
âThatâs it,â he drawled, pressing his face to the side of your head. He inhaled, letting your scent flood him. Every sense was overwhelmed by you and if anything, it made him hunger for even more.
You became more pliable in your daze, going easily when Coriolanus laid you back down on the cold ground. He planted one hand on the ground near your head, where he held most of his weight, while the other rested on the base of your neck. Not squeezing, just resting. Reminding you of before.
Now that heâd taken care of you, made you realize the pleasure he could inflict upon you, it was his turn. Coriolanus was relentless with the thrust of his cock inside you, stretching you around him, groaning with nearly every movement. You felt so good, he never wanted to leave the warmth of your body.
You shifted beneath him, squirming as the intense feeling. Coriolanus was tempted to drag it out, to watch your face as the pleasure became too much for you to handle.
If it wasnât for the desire to fill you, to claim you, he wouldâve. There would be more times after this, heâd ensure it. He didnât own a lot, but he treasured the things that he did.
âI canât let you go, not now.â He meant to keep it inside his head, but the words spilled out. âYouâre the only thing I want.â
At that moment, it was true.
Coriolanus gave one final shove of his hips before spilling inside of you. It crashed over him in an unexpected wave. His whole body shivered with pleasure at the feel of your body milking him. You wanted him. Your denial would eventually fade. He was sure of it.
Coriolanus let out a heavy sigh of your name as he watched your face. Youâd turned your head, wincing as he filled you to the brim.
âHey,â Coriolanus said when he finished, voice low. He ran a delicate hand over your face, persuading you to open your eyes. âWeâre okay.â
As much as he didnât want to, Coriolanus withdrew from you. Youâd given up fighting against him, so he took the opportunity to help you redress. You were so pliant, it was like dressing a doll.
You rested your arms on your knees when he made you sit up. He wasnât keeping you from moving from the floor, you chose not to.
Coriolanus watched you cautiously, searching for the same fire in you before, trying to figure out if heâd somehow snuffed it out.
There was a nagging in his gut. It was only for a brief second, but his confidence wavered.
âCan you talk to me?â he pressed, laying a hand on your shoulder and he knelt across from you, pants readjusted.
It was as if nothing happened, but you both knew that was untrue.
âWhy should I?â You wrinkled your nose as you focused on the ground.
âBecause, I care about you,â Coriolanus replied without thought, gaze softening. âI want to make sure youâre okay.â
âI donât think you care for me,â you said in a tone so hushed, Coriolanus wasnât sure if you even meant for him to hear. Then, you met his eyes. The fire had only been dulled, not put out. âI think youâre a liar, Coriolanus Snow.â
His hands fell to clasp yours. He brought one to his lips, pressing a small kiss to the back of your palm. You eyed him as if he were some sort of predator, but he managed a smile nonetheless.
âLet me prove it to you, and youâll come to learn youâve been wrong about me all along.â
#coriolanus snow x reader#coriolanus x you#coriolanus x reader#coriolanus snow#dark!coriolanus snow#yandere coriolanus snow#the hunger games#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#tom blyth#quin-ns writing
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Ęá´É´á´
á´Ęá´ É´á´Ęá´
x Ęá´á´á´
á´Ę á´á´Ęá´ đ¸
yan nerd who gets put into a group project with you and some other npcs, as he calls them, not paying any attention to neither of them, rather going to practically sit on your lap and cling onto you the whole period.
yan nerd who annoys the other members of the project bc hes js there helping you, letting only you copy, and they could literally hear the down bad things hes whispering in your ear (hes doing it on purpose bc he thinks they want u and he needs those bitchs to back off)
"Hey (nerd yan name), why arent you helping us as well? We literally having zero fucking clue what to do." One of the members asked, scrunching his eyebrows together in confusion.
yan nerd who ignores them and goes back to acting cringy to you as you look as if hes holding u hostage.
yan nerd who is an absolute loser that prob has greasy fried hair, ofc he calls u his alpha and its him and u against the world.. uhm so! this is insane!
yan nerd who literally hyperfocuses on anything u like, making himself liking it aswell. Js so he can âaccidentallyâ bring them up in conversation, and see the way ur eyes lit up in surprise at the fact he remembered ur interests. Whenever you talk about anything you like, he quickly talks about it himself to make him seem more likeable to you,
yan nerd who in the middle of class, day dreams abt you literally with roses and hearts in background as you say "Your so hot~" (hes delusional pls..)
yan nerd who has had one gf but that was the start of his obsession with you and he was trying to stop himself with being obsessed
lets js say it didnt work bc when he was making out with his gf, he kept whimpering and moaning out your name...đ
yan nerd who tries to impress you with fun facts as he puts up his glasses up the bridge of his nose. Heâs the type to text you random facts throughout the day, just to remind u of him
ÉŞĘá´á´ á´ĘɢŇĘ/É´
did u know that dogs have dreams?
I just wanted to let yk so when we have 10 kids, 3 dogs, and a cat together baby <33
yan nerd who over analyzes everything, every convo with u leads him to be in the dark of his room, smiling and delusionally think u need him in ur bed and that u def want him bc u looked at his lips for 0.01 secs
yan nerd who even practice conversations in their head before seeing Y/N again, trying to make sure everything goes perfectly. Though, whenever he go infront of you and actually try to talk to you, he loses all composure and says the first thing to mind. "Can u sit on my nos- I mean!"
yan nerd who lowk has rizz tho
âHey, did you know sea otters hold hands when they sleep, so they donât drift apart? Kinda like how I wouldnât want to drift apart from you, baby" He says looking at you with the most down bad eyes, rubbing your thigh under the table as you try to pay attention to the math lesson
"bro unhand me"
"If i do, will you bounce on it?"
yan nerd who, nvm does not have rizz
yan nerd who is a loser who spends most of his time humping a body pillow of u <333
MORE COMING OUT SOON!!!!!
RESQUESTS ARE CLOSED
#yandere x reader#yanderemalexreader#soft yandere#clingy yandere#tw yandere#yandere blog#yandere boyfriend#yandere x darling#yandere#yandere male#destinys worksss<333#yandere nerd
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â° sevikas obsession with watching you ââË
description: kind of nsfw drabble about sevika who canât get enough of your every move.
cw: suggestive, no smut, horny tho, pet names (baby, doll), reader wears a dress + is implied to be feminine, gendered terms (girl, etc) , reader âflips her hairâ at one point
a/n: too lazy to write a fanfic right now so have this instead. as always please submit requests if you have any.
MINORS DNI.
Sevika watched you every time you came into the bar, eyes trained on your every move. Every time you laughed at something some sleazy guy said, clearly trying to swindle more drinks out of them. Every time you fluttered between the jukebox, to the tables, and back to the bar again. It was her favourite pastime.
Her eyes would linger so directly, so intensely, everyone at her table could feel it. If the way she repeatedly disregarded her hand of poker to watch you instead wasnât obvious enough.
She loved when you got wilder and more carefree as the night progressed, a gradual but steady change that happened without fail every time. It revealed things about you, made her feel like she knew you through those little cracks in your party girl facade. Your skin slowly got hotter and hotter, little hairs sticking to your face and neck. Each drink made you feel looser as you transitioned from swaying slowly to the music to dancing, hips rotating to the rhythm of the song, enjoying yourself. Not one person in that joint was good enough for you. Couldnât give you what you needed. Well, except for one. Her.
She could give you what you wanted, what you craved. You were only there for one thing. For someone to take care of you.
And itâs not like you didnât notice her. Oh, you did. How could you not notice someone like her as soon as you step into a room? Her presence commanded the attention of everyone in attendance. It didnât matter if she was storming through the building toward Silcoâs office, having a drink at the bar, or sitting with her legs spread and a stack of cards clamped in her flesh hand like she was now, everyone saw her and you were definitely no exception.
The first time you caught sight of her, she was hustling over to a reserved table in the back, powerful muscles rippling with every movement. You needed to know her name. You turned to the bartender (Chuck, was it?) and asked him.
âWhoâs that?â You gestured vaguely with your head in the direction of the imposing woman.
âThatâs Sevika, Silcoâs number two. Iâd stay away from her if I was you, sweetheart.â
Over time, you loved reciprocating, staring back just as fiercely every time you noticed her. The urge to tease her from across the room was irresistible and you indulged in it. You intentionally licked your lips after every sip of your fruity drink, wore short short skirts just so you could show yourself off to her, whispered naught things in the ears of strangers at the bar, all while maintaining heady eye contact. You couldnât help yourself with the addictive way her attentions made you feel, warm and breathless.
And you knew she loved it too, even when her jaw visibly clenched and the cards in her hand were squashed in her tight grip.
What you didnât love was the waiting. The both of you would stare at each, practically fucking with your eyes, but neither one of you did anything about it. It was almost as if Sevika wanted you to beg for it, crawl to her on your hands and knees and plead for her to help you, take you, touch you. And you, well, you were just too damn stubborn for that.
So after countless nights of skirting around it, you took one last sip of your drink and marched toward the throng of bodies writhing and gyrating to the music.
If she wasnât going to give in first, fine. Youâd just have to make her.
It started off slow, closing your eyes and losing yourself in the music. The beat, heavy and pulsing, jumped in your ears and thrummed through your whole body. You tossed your hair over your shoulder as you moved in a tight, rhythmic circle, surrounded by flushed, sweaty bodies.
Your fingertips brushed against your skin, gliding up, up, up the length of your thighs. The urge to open your eyes and find hers, which were no doubt watching your every move, was overwhelming. But you steeled your resolve and continued this push and pull, rolling your hips much more purposefully now.
The relentless flickering shades of purple and blue cast an otherworldly glow across your sweaty flesh. Darkness, light, darkness, light again. You swivelled in Sevikas direction, knowing she was watching you, and of course she was. Her eyes were buried beneath furrowed brows, those deep pools of brown recognisable even with the distance between you. Every flash of light revealed her gaze again, increasingly torn between enjoying the view and stomping over to join you each time.
Slipping your eyes shut again, you decided to finish the show. Drive the nail straight into the coffin. And the closest idiot would have to do.
He was tall, brown hair, plain, not bad looking but definitely not who you really wanted. He was quick to follow your lead as you pulled him over, none too gently, by the arm and ground yourself right up against him, his hands floundering for a moment before you steadied them against your hips just like that.
Before you knew it he was gone, though. There was a flurry of movement and a little commotion, leaving you flustered and confused, but the big, solid wall of muscle that took his place immediately after told you all you needed to know. The thick, cloying smell of smoke and warm flesh surrounded you and you looked up, pleasantly unsurprised to find Sevika staring back down at you. The angle was a bit awkward and you couldnât really see from the strobing lights but she looked a mixture of pissed and something else, her nose flared and extremely kissable mouth set in a frown.
The drinks, the music, the overstimulation of it all had your senses totally inebriated and your skin buzzing. You couldnât help yourself from grinding back on her crotch, your skin meeting the cool, hard metal of her belt.
âWas waiting for you,â you said over the music.
She grunted, eyelids fluttering as she bumped against your ass repeatedly, assuming a senseless rhythm. Sevika leaned down to your height and spoke into the back of your ear.
âCanât hear you, doll.â
Before you could reply, she began trailing little sucks and kisses down the skin of your neck. Your next response was breathy and jerky as you clenched your thighs together and leaned into her touch.
âSaid IâŚw-was waiting for you to come take care of me.â
Sevika nodded and stilled your movements sharply with two large, firm hands on each hip.
âLetâs get out of here, baby, yeah?â
đľđ¸ click here for information on how you can help palestine
#ࡠdrabbles#đ mysmalldevotion#sevika#sevika x reader#sevika arcane#arcane#arcane fanfic#fanfic#fanfiction
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s2 intro was so fire. and I thought like s1 it showed/hinted at the things that would happen during this season. but most stuff didn't happen or it didn't live up to the imagery used in the intro
Vi smudging the VI tattoo. it implies that she would struggle with her identity and the name connected with it and the legacy connected with it, like Jinx did in s1. maybe this could even be her going so far as to reject the name itself, like denying that she's The Vi to keep a low profile. like how Jinx would insist that she's not Powder in s1. but none of that ever happened. Vi never struggles with 'being Vi' or what it means to her or with being Vander's prodigy even tho he's brought back from the dead.
this shot implying that this was gonna be a story about the sisters, but also that Jinx is Vi's burden or her shadow or a demon on her shoulder. but to explore Vi's feelings on her sister and what she's become they'd have to try to explore Vi at all
this shot which implies to me 'Jinx being Jinx' cos it's a callback to when she does the finger gun in s1, but even more so to when she does it as a kid in the Enemy MV. in the scene she, when she still went by Powder, aims a finger gun at enforcers and as she pretend fires at them it flashes to Jinx standing there. so a 'Jinx was always Jinx' message. but it also alludes to her having a target like the firelight in s1 or the enforcers in the MV, who she always hated.
the two times we see Ekko he reverses time, which ig he technically does but the meat of his story is him going to a parallel universe, not going back in time. idk ig I thought that time travel would be more relevant to Ekko's story than parallel universe travel. in the end time travel is only meaningfully used for the timebomb angst scene even tho it's not really necessary there. ig I thought the powers would be more relevant to Ekko's whole character and arc. in an Ekko lol short he reverses time to defeat the bad guy and when he finally succeeds it's at the cost of the destruction of the mural for dead kids, and so he goes back in time again. that's more meaningful than anything they did with firelights in s2 (and arguably more meaningful than the timebomb scene). why did they drop the sick tree plotline? the firelights? his past with Jinx? his involvement in the revolution? the past vs present and saving the things we love? I swear they were teasing me with an epic time travel episode but delivered a parallel universe (derogatory) episode.
this type of shots made me think that Cait would actually struggle internally to an extreme degree with her actions and how the power corrupts her etc. that she'd become horrified of what she's become. and how she'd hate and struggle with maintaining her appearances to the public.
the first shot made it seem like, just like Cait, Jayce would struggle with public attention and maybe scrutiny, considering he was the head of the council in s1. but then the first thing he does this season is resign and that's that for him being a public persona and struggling with his reputation even tho s1 and his lol lore focus on that. like that stuff's so juicy don't get rid of that.
the second shot hints to me at him discovering smth grand/important connected to the arcane, which ig kinda happened but what it ended up being is that Jayce got transported to a bad universe and learned that arcane bad. meanwhile this shot evokes to me smth more awe-inspiring, idk like smth mystical and magical, arcane, you could say. with white bright light often being used in media to communicate divinity. wild runes mumbo jumbo and Jayce being transported to a bad arcane universe seem so pedestrian compared to like, heavenly lights ig.
both concepts for Jayce's story that were introduced in the intro and the eps delivered on neither.
I don't remember the french revolution ending with the ppl teaming up with the royalty. I also don't get the impression that there are any french revolution stories out there with the hero thinking the revolution is an irritating nuisance. this parallel is so extremely unwarranted and borderline offensive.
Viktor did turn out to be evil and he did get a cult as this shot implied but the mask obvs references his lol mech suit that he never gets. there was no reason for him to be designed the way he was, as an arcane deity with specifically a mask, outside of for the purpose of having the faintest similarity to his lol design. the mask, the cult, all that third arm imagery in s1? it all references his lol lore, for nothing, cos they took his character in a drastically different direction. talk about blue balls. and same thing with the light as with Jayce, the light coming from the mask implies Revelations connected to the mask but also loss of identity/being consumed by it. maybe a glorious evolution? idk it again just feels like someone knew what the fans wanted but it wasn't the writers. but someone still put all this in the intro. teasing a better story that we'll never get to see.
there's also all the Black Rose imagery that seemed important even tho they weren't in the end. it being connected to Mel (politician) and Ambessa (politician/warrior) made me think that they would focus on the Black Rose being a political organization that wants smth connected to Piltover and the PnZ conflict, with all the imagery of holding the rose/squishing the rose/being the rose/picking up the rose alluding to the political scheming between Ambessa/Mel/the Black Rose. but they went the route of out of nowhere making Mel magic. imagine if in a random ep of s1 they made Silco magic.
why? why why why why why?
the intro did more for all the character arcs than the episodes themselves
#vi#jinx#ekko#caitlyn kiramman#jayce talis#jayce#viktor#mel medarda#ambessa medarda#arcane#my:arcane#arcane s2#arcane critical#vi arcane#jinx arcane#ekko arcane#viktor arcane
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â again and again â˘
pairing: mingyu x reader
summary:Â your mother calls one day, asking if youâre bringing mingyu along for chuseok this year. in your panic, you end up giving her an affirmativeânever mind the fact that you and mingyu have stopped seeing each other over half a year ago.
word count: 15.7k words
tags: exes, fake dating, mutual pining, idol!gyu, vet!reader, mild angst, fluff, smut
warnings: medical jargon, mentions of shots (for pets), mentions of snake bites, graphic sexual content (minors dni!!)
notes:Â i wrote this with bss' 7pm on loop for two straight days. nothing like the sweet taste of yearning <3 this also wasn't extensively proofread, so if you spot a few mistakes, i implore you to ignore them EJWHJHSDF
this is part of the doting on you! series.
smut tags: vanilla, mingyu is super whipped, praise kink, service top gyu, dirty talk, nicknames (babygirl, sweetheart, sweet thing), overstimulation, multiple rounds, unprotected sex, creampie, heads up that the filth is at the very end tho
taglist: @cherrycheolie1995 - @ashkuuuu - @potatofrieswithketchup - @christinewithluv - @fancypoisonapple - @odetoyeonjun - @minnie-mouser22 - @etherealyoungk - @davoraciousreader - @mariondior - @hella-sirius - @coveyland - @marlow234 - @dobomiyeon - @belysusonrisa - @wonderfulshinee - @misssugarlips - @yourfavoritefreakyhan - @jeanjacketjesus - @just-here-to-read-01 - @hanihans - @venusrae - @taestrwbrry - @seoksoop - @dreamhannies - @renjunphile - @thvhannie - @kkooongie - @acgyu - @gae-uls - @pluviophile-xxx - @lenireads - @gaebestie - @ryusha-rose - @yutadae - @smileyjimvn
additional notes: you might want to check your visibility settings if you can't be tagged!
When you hear the telltale ring as the call connects to its intended recipient, you wonder why you even considered this idea in the first place. Not to mention, youâre getting a nasty case of phone call anxietyâone that you havenât felt in god knows how long. Maybe itâs because of the identity of the person youâre calling that your nerves are all over the place.Â
In fact, youâre not sure if heâs even going to answer. There are a million and a half reasons why famous superstar Kim Mingyu wonât be able to pick up your call. He could be shooting for a music video or some fashion magazine. He could be in the middle of an interview. Or he could be out spending time with his members like tends to these days if his recent Instagram posts are anything to go by.Â
But you try anyway because your mother sounded so hopeful in the phone call you just hung up on five minutes ago (The rice wine he got for us last Christmas was splendid! Heâll bring some again for Chuseok, wonât he?), that you just didnât have the heart to tell her the truth.
So, because you canât take back the pretty white lies you uttered (Uh, of course he will. Gyu told me he missed everyone back at home, too. Especially Namja), youâre attempting to rope Mingyu into the charade even if the odds are against you.
The first call doesnât go through. Neither does the second.Â
By your third try, youâre about to accept the fact that youâre going to have to make some due corrections to what you told your mother until you hear a groggy, âHello?â on the other line.Â
You nearly fall off your seat at the throaty sound of Mingyuâs voice, but youâd rather not get weird looks from your receptionist, so you breathe in as deeply (and quietly) as you can before mustering a smile that he wonât even be able to see.
âHey, Mingyu, itâs me,â you begin, a bit proud of how your voice didnât even falter. âItâs been a while. Did I catch you at a bad time?â
He doesnât respond for a while, and the prolonged silence makes you bite the inside of your cheek. Did the call fall through? Did he not hear what you said? But just when youâre about to repeat the wordsâ
âKind of,â Mingyu grumbles, and you try not to think about how sexy his morning voice sounds despite it being two in the afternoon. âWe finished taping a variety show today and I figured Iâd get some sleep. Itâs midnight right now.â
Well thatâs news to you.
âOh. Youâre not in Korea?â
âNah. Weâre in New York for some brand collaborations,â he says, and you hear some rustling in the background, followed by a yawn. âThough I doubt youâve been keeping tabs on us.âÂ
Okay, he doesnât have to call you out like that.
Sure, you still catch posts from Mingyu, as well as the other twelve members of SEVENTEEN from time to time, butâŚafter breaking up with him (on good terms, promise!), you thought itâs best if you didnât see too much of them anymore. The block and mute buttons are your best friends, and while you didnât use them on the members directly, gossip outlets were your regular targets.
So to speak, itâs been a peaceful six months since your break up with Mingyu.Â
Until now.
âDo you need something?â he asks, and you realize you didnât respond to what he said last. âWhatever it is, I might not be able to help you out right away. Weâre holed up here until next month.â
WellâŚthatâs all the confirmation you needed.
âI see,â you sigh, trying not to sound too disappointed. âItâsâ Itâs okay.â
âSo you do need something,â Mingyu points out, voice much clearer now than it was two minutes ago. Like he was more awake. âWhat is it?â
âNothing you should worry about, Gyu,â you reassure before making a face, not realizing how easily the old nickname just slipped out. âIâm sorry for waking you up. You should go back toââ
The sound of him whining at the other end sends another rush of vertigo through your entire being. âCome on, Iâm awake anyways right? You know how hard it is for me to fall asleep again.â
âIf Iâd known we werenât in the same continent, I wouldnât have called altogether,â you say before quaintly adding, âShit. This counts as an international call, doesnât it?â
Thereâs someone else in the room with him, you thinkâa quiet drawl of Mingyu-hyung, what time is it? You immediately recognize it as Seungkwan.Â
âFive minutes past midnight,â Mingyu says, and Seungkwan asks another question that you arenât able to catch. âWho am I talking to? Bookkeu and Bobpulâs worst enemy.â
âHey!â You scowl at him. âThey never even whined when you and Seungkwan brought them to me for their shots!â
âNoona? Why are you calling this guy?â Seungkwan says a bit more loudly for you to hear. âDidnât you dump him already? Good choice, by the way.âÂ
This time itâs Mingyuâs turn to utter out a semi-offended, âHey! Mind your own business, Seungkwan-ah.â
A few minutes of bickering with his dongsaeng later, you figure that Mingyu mustâve gone outside of their hotel room for some privacy. You can vaguely hear the sound of the wind blowing on his end before he heaves a deep sigh.
âSorry about that.â He coughs awkwardly. âAnyway, if youâre not going to tell me about what you needed help with, how are you? Is the clinic doing well? Did your receptionist finally ditch her shitty boyfriend? Does that one guy with a husky still hit on you?â
Youâre a little overwhelmed by the sudden influx of questions. Last you checked, you havenât spoken to Mingyu since you greeted him on his birthday over a quick text message. But then again, your ex does have a talent for completely ignoring the time that exists in between interactions. Mingyuâs always been amicable for conversation, idol or not, boyfriend or not.Â
The mere thought that he hasnât changed at all makes your heart ache in more ways than one.
You manage a quiet laugh. âIâm fine. The clinicâs fine. Chae has a new boyfriend now. He even helps us sort out new products on the shelves sometimes.â
At the mention of her name, your receptionist whips her head in your direction, one brow raised. You shake your head with a smile, gesturing that this is nothing she should even be remotely concerned about.Â
Itâs just Mingyu after all.
âOkay, how about the guy whoââ
âI turned him down when he asked me out for lunch last week.â
He whistles. âOuch. And heâs been trying to get with you all this time.â
âI donât usually date my clients, you know.â
âYeah? I must be special then.â
Then comes the silenceâso thick, you can cut through it with a knife.Â
âUh, so I have a patient coming in an hour for a castration procedure,â you tell him a bit awkwardly. âGotta prepare everything before the owner arrives.â
Mingyu sighs, and you can almost imagine him pouting. âYouâre really not gonna tell me? I can still help you with whatever you need even when Iâm out here. Unless it requires me to, you know, physically be there.â
You chuckle. âThatâs the thing, Gyu. You canât help me because I need you to actually be here.â
âOh. Why? What for?â
You inhale sharp breath through your nose, closing your eyes as your face warms with embarrassment. Chae is definitely looking at you funnily from her station now, but you tell yourself not to give it too much thought.
âMom asked if I was bringing you with me for Chuseok,â you admit. âI havenât been home since Christmas, so⌠They kind of have no idea that we arenât together anymore.â
Mingyu falls silent for a while yet again, and you realize that your anxiousness spikes whenever he isnât talking like thereâs no tomorrow. You wonder if heâs figured out what youâre trying to insinuate and is silently berating you for the lapse in judgment. But when Mingyu bursts out laughing on the other end, you suddenly don't mind being on the receiving end of his silence after all.
âNo way,â he gasps between chuckles. âYou were going to ask me to pretend to be your boyfriend over the holidays, werenât you?! One of the fans wrote a story about the exact same thing once, except itâs between me and Wonwoo-hyung. It was in English though, but Vernon translated it pretty well.â
âŚKim Mingyu admitting to reading fanfiction about himself and Wonwoo aside, you groan. âWhat am I supposed to do? My family loves you. Iâd rather not dampen the Chuseok spirit by saying their favorite son has unfortunately made his unannounced exit half a year ago.â
âSo youâre willing to pretend weâre still together just to keep them happy?â
âWell, yeah. Itâs not like youâre an ex I should be ashamed of, Gyu.â
âBecause Iâm an idol that millions are vying for?âÂ
You roll your eyes. âNo. Itâs because out of all my exes, youâre the only one that Namja actually likes. Thatâs pretty much the highest honor you can receive in your entire life.â
Your heart does a little flip when Mingyu barks out another light-hearted laugh. You tell yourself that youâre only reacting that way becauseâŚit has been a while since you talked to him. That, and Mingyu was always so smiley whenever you brought up your ten year-old retriever.
âPoint taken,â he says. âIâd totally be down to help you out, butâŚyeah.â
âI knew you would be,â you reply, a sad smile ghosting your features. âThatâs why I called.â
Silence settles over the line once again, but itâs, by no means, awkward. Itâs moreâŚsentimental. Like two old friends reminiscing about the good memories you shared.Â
Huh. Youâre friends with MingyuâŚ
âAnyway, thanks for catching up with me, Mingyu,â you tell him before you end up saying something youâre not supposed to. âIâll get going now. Good night.â
âHeyââ
You end the call before he can have the chance to make you falter.
Right behind her desk, Chae looks up at you with a knowing look. You flash her a smile that silently pleads for her not to say a word, but your receptionist has always been on the frank side.
âSomethingâs telling me youâre still hung up on him, boss.â
Sighing, you push yourself back to your feet, tugging on the lapels of your crisp white coat. That might be true to some degree, but itâs not like you can do anything about it.
You and Mingyu live in two completely different worlds. Itâs something that you both came to terms with when you broke up. You just had to accept the fact that thereâs simply no efficient way to work around his busy schedules and the appointments you need to attend to at the clinic.Â
It was the most unproblematic breakup youâve ever had, and itâs with a famous idol. Who wouldâve thought.Â
âAnyway,â you tell Chae before nudging the door to the operating room open. âCare to help me look for the anesthetics? I canât remember where I put them away last timeâŚâ
Your receptionist is most definitely judging you inside your head, but despite how straightforward she can be, Chae still knows when to drop it. After a few clicks on the clinicâs desktop computer, she joins you on the hunt for that pesky bottle of anesthesia without asking any intrusive questions.
You make a mental note to treat her to some coffee tomorrow.
âŚ
One of the reasons you seldomly paid your hometown a visit is the hassle that comes with the entire commute.
First you have to endure the long queue to get tickets before sitting through an eight-hour train ride to the seaside town of Haenam. Then comes navigating the local bus routes and schedules that always seem to change every time you go home.Â
When you made it out of the train station for this yearâs Chuseok celebration, you didnât even bother stressing yourself out with taking the bus back to your parentsâ houseâflagging down a taxi that definitely charged you a ridiculous rate in exchange for your utmost comfort instead.Â
You try not to think about how easier it was last Christmas, when you and Mingyu took turns driving one of his companyâs cars on the way hereâlaughing and singing along to their songs on the road like nothing else mattered.
The scent of salt hangs heavy in the breeze when you unload your baggage from the trunk of the taxi. You had the foresight to make the trip before midnight, so youâre rewarded with the sight of the sunrise breaking through the nearby oceanâlight glittering across the horizon like it means to say welcome home.Â
Thatâs what you should feel; like youâre at home. But the fact that youâre about to bring some disappointing news to the table regarding your breakup with Mingyu isnât doing your peace of mind any favors.Â
You contemplated coming clean about it to your parents over a phone call, but it seemed tooâŚimpersonal with how attached theyâve gotten to your ex-boyfriend. Having a significant other that your family absolutely adores seems like a double-edged sword now that you think about it.
Once the cab hits the road again, you stand in front of your family home with a wistful sigh. Itâs barely past seven in the morning, but your father must already be at the pierâsorting out todayâs catch with the other fishermen in town.
Your mother loves taking walks in the market even if she doesnât have anything in particular to purchase for the day. Theyâre early risers by default.Â
You canât really say the same for your younger brother, Haneul, though. That one likes to sleep until noon.Â
When you ring the doorbell outside, you expect to hear the sound of excited barking from the other side of the gate. Namja was always the first to welcome you back whenever youâre in town, and just thinking about reuniting with him quells your anxiousness a little. But surprisingly, you donât hear the telltale noise of your family dogâs excitement.Â
What you do hear is the sound of the screen door opening and slamming back shutâslippers being hastily slid on before the gate creaks open, revealing Haneul still sporting a bedhead as he rubs his eyes.
âYouâre back,â he says a-matter-of-factly, like he isnât even thrilled to see you, but youâre too surprised to see him up so early to quip about it. âMom said you wouldnât arrive until noon.â
âI wanted to make the most of my vacation leave,â you explain before looking around the garden inside. âWhereâs Namja? Did Mom take him for a walk, too?â
Haneul hums before taking your luggage. âHm. You can say that.â
âWhat does that even mean?â
As if on cue, your ears perk up at the sound of a familiar bark resounding from the end of the road. You quickly whip your head around to see your beloved golden retriever, Namja, wagging his tail excitedly at the sight of you before letting out another woof when you call out his name in glee.
However, the moment you realize whoâs holding his leash, you suddenly feel like you got struck by lightning.
Itâs Kim fucking Mingyu.
The sight of your ex-boyfriend just...standing there when he told you he was on the other side of the world sends a million thoughts surging through your head all at once.
You try not to think about how gorgeous he looks in the early morning light. Loose, long sleeved shirt that still emphasizes his muscular build despite. Hair having grown past his chin, curling slightly at the tips. And those stupid fucking canines that peek from his lips every time he grins.Â
The bastard is just standing there with zero disguises, as if his existence in this place, at this point in time, doesn't throw a wrench in all of your plans.
What the hell is he even doing here?!
âOh, sweetie, youâre back!â
The sound of your motherâs voice is, thankfully, enough to snap you out of your impending mental breakdown. You were so taken aback by Mingyuâs presence that you didnât notice her standing next to him, carrying the bag she usually brings for her early market visits as she flashes you a warm smile.Â
You can only stand there in shocked silence as your mother makes her way back to the house with your dog and ex-boyfriend in tow. Haneul was already inside, so you canât exactly glare at him for not giving you a headâs up. But given that you still have no idea what on earth is going on, youâll play along. For now.
âAre you surprised?â your mother giggles before patting Mingyuâs shoulder. âMingyu here said he got off work for a while so he could celebrate with us!â
âGee, I didnât know about that,â you say dryly, unsure of what expression you should even wear. âI thought he was going to be in New York until next month.â
She laughs again. âOh, he told me and your father to keep it a secret that heâs going back to Korea anyways. Seems like the surprise worked, didnât it, Mingyu-ah?â
The culprit himself agrees with a minute nod before loosening his grip on Namjaâs leash.Â
Your goldie immediately bounds towards you at the first sign of freedom, bracing his paws on your stomach as he attempts to lick your neck. Itâs enough to distract you from the current predicament at hand, making you sigh in defeat as you sink to your knees and receive Namjaâs slobbery affection in its entirety.Â
As you snuggle up to the family dog, Mingyu says, âWhat can I say? I missed Haenam a lot. The scenery, the family, Namja, but of courseâŚâ
You can only sit there in growing disbelief as Mingyu mirrors your movements. He crouches low enough so that your gazes are leveled before caressing your face with a tenderness thatâs both familiar and foreign at the same time.Â
âI missed her the most.â
This is all a charadeâthatâs what you can confirm from the limited clues heâs dropping for you to pick up on. You can try to figure out why heâs suddenly here in your hometownâhaving arrived earlier than you, from the looks of itâa little later.
Whatâs important is that Mingyu, ever-so helpful, is actually playing along with the act you not-so-jokingly told him about on the phone.
You should be glad.Â
âŚBut why do those words make your heart ache anyways?
âOf course you do,â you sigh before peeling yourself away from his touch, carrying Namja in your arms as if he doesnât easily weigh thirty kilograms. âCome on. Letâs get back inside and help Mom prepare whatever sheâs planning on cooking for lunch.â
Mingyuâs smile doesnât falter despite your obvious dismissal of his affection. You remind yourself that heâs racked up a lot of acting gigs throughout his career, so itâs normal for him to be a natural at this.Â
But even if you know that this is all an act, you canât help the way your heart lurches when Mingyu scoops Namja out of your graspâthe mere brush of his skin on yours more electrifying than it should be.
Namja whines in your exâs arms, pawing at his chest before licking a long stripe across his cheek. Mingyu bursts out laughing as he coos at him, and your chest burns with an indescribable feeling.
A few moments later, your mother starts gushing about how excited she is to have both of you in the kitchen with her again as she leads you back inside the house. But all that rings in your head is a broken mantra of Mingyu saying I missed her the most.
As if repeating the words enough times will make them come true.
...
Itâs one thing to know that Mingyu is in Haenam when heâs supposed to be overseas.
Itâs another thing to see his usual overnight bag at the foot of your unmade bed, making you realize that he definitely came here much earlier than you anticipated.
Mingyu is currently in the kitchen, helping your mother out with lunch prep while she insists that you get some sleep first. Though the trains that led to the southern provinces were designed to be more comfortable than the ones contained in Seoul, nothing defeats the comfort of your old childhood bed.Â
Except when youâre made aware of the fact that your ex-boyfriend probably slept in it after making the trip all the way here.Â
The sheets even smell like him. A hint of that expensive fragrance he never seems to get tired of laces your pillows, and warmth rushes to your face when you realize youâre breathing it in a bit too much.Â
So what if Mingyu slept here, right? Your parentsâ house doesnât have a guest room, and this was probably the only room available.
Oh, and in your familyâs eyes, Mingyu is still your boyfriend. There shouldnât be anything weird about your boyfriend, who went out of his way to quote-unquote surprise you, sleeping in your room, on your bed, without your knowledge.
And there definitely isnât an issue with having to sleep next to him on said bed come nightfall.
You totally got this.
An attempt to dissuade all these intrusive thoughts is made as you unload the contents of your luggage into your old cabinet. It works for a while because all the old clothes you still kept tickled some memories from way back in high school, when becoming a vet was nothing but a pipe dream you came up with after Namja became sick on the day of his first birthday.Â
In fact, as you look around further, youâre reminded of just how much time has passed since you moved out. The paint on the walls is starting to chip, and the floorboards creakier than you remember. Even the bed that was too spacious for your liking seems to shrink when you imagine Mingyu sprawled all over it with a blanket thrown over his large form.Â
But when you recall how you two somehow made the sleeping arrangement work last Christmas, you figure that there isnât much to worry about.
Aside from the fact that youâre not together anymore. Fuck.
âHey. Are you awake?â
You jolt at the sound of a soft voice coming from the door. Mingyuâs handsome face peeks from the crack before he opens it all the way, lips pressed together in a hesitant smile.
âYour mom asked if I could fetch your father at the pier in a few,â he says. âDo you want to come with me or do you want to get some sleep first?â
âDo I want toââ you cut yourself off, throwing your hands up in disbelief. âMingyu, what I want is for you to explain what youâre doing here.â
He cranes his head. âYou said you needed help.â
âYeah, but I was going to be honest about the breakup anyway!â you whisper, not wanting to attract unwanted attention from outside. God knows this house has paper-thin walls. âBut then youâre suddenly here, cozying up to my family like we havenât been ignoring each other for months already.â
âHey, Iâd never ignore you.â Mingyu pouts. âI even picked up when you called me at ass oâclock in the morning, remember? If someoneâs ignoring anyone here, itâs you, sweetheart.â
You hate how you bristle at that little pet name. Mingyu doesnât seem to notice how you react to it, so you steel yourself insteadârefusing to give into his unintentional charms. âThatâs not the point and you know it, Mingyu. You canât blame me for reacting this way when you told me that you wouldnât be able to help me out.â
âBut Iâm here, right? I thought youâd be a little happier to see me, but I might have been overestimating myself.â
You are. You are happy to see him.Â
But having to live with the knowledge that Mingyu is right here, close enough for you to touch, yet canât because your relationship has long expired?Â
You werenât ready for that. You donât think youâll ever be.
âLook,â he starts with a tone thatâs meant to placate you, âyou were right about not wanting to ruin the holidays with the breakup. Iâm just here to help you out since youâre obviously not ready to break the news to your family. Itâs not a big deal.â
You scowl at him. âMingyu, it is a big deal. You are literally an idol with a packed fucking schedule. You canât just play house with me here when youâre expected to be somewhere else.â
Mingyu shakes his head. âListen to me first, okay? We were all given the weekend off because of Chuseok on short notice. You donât have to worry about you unknowingly stealing me away from work because there is no work. Besides, I told you Iâd still be here when you need me, right?â
How can he say all that with a straight face? Like he still thinks of you as anything but an old flame thatâs long been snuffed out?
The problem with Mingyu is that heâs too earnest for his own good. Always wearing a spectrum of emotions on his sleeve. Always so honest about what he feels about certain things. Itâs so fucking difficult to stand your ground against someone whoâs nothing but forthcoming about every aspect of his life.Â
But itâs not like you could ever resist him to begin with, right?
âFine,â you grumble. âGive me a few minutes to prep. I donât want to go out in the docks wearing this many layers anyways.â
You hate how your chest warms when Mingyuâs eyes light up at that. Fight back, maybe?!
He looks like heâs about to say something when an abrupt knock disturbs the quiet atmosphere of your room. From how annoyingly long it lasts, you single out your younger brother as the perpetrator.
âYou better not be making your firstborn in there,â Haneul drawls from the other side.Â
Mingyu flashes you a mischievous smile before cupping the sides of his hands over his mouth. âWe might be making our second born for all you know.â
You wonât survive this weekend. You really wonât.
âŚ
âRemember when we used to eat ice cream by the Han River?âÂ
You flash Mingyu a perplexed look as you climb out of the car he used to drive all the way to your hometown. Itâs a mystery how his manager allows him to go places with their company car with no supervision, but itâs not like Mingyu has done anything in the past to warrant that kind of surveillance anyway.
Besides, if heâs spending the entirety of Chuseok with a bunch of bodyguards lingering around your house, you might actually force him to go back to Seoul altogether.
âWhyâd you bring it up?â you ask. âI thought you didnât like those kinds of dates âcause you had to amp up the disguises and everything.â
Mingyu pockets the keys to the car before leaning against the metal railings installed along the pier. Your father is yet to show up at your rendezvous point, so you figure it wouldnât do anyone harm to entertain Mingyuâs attempt at small talk.Â
âHmm. While I did prefer just cuddling in the dorms and at your place, it always felt a little different whenever we went out together,â he muses, the wind tossing his hair around slightly before turning to look at you. âHow about you? Do you have any favorite date of ours in particular?â
You sigh, unsure why heâs even asking you all of this. Yet you indulge him anyway with, âI donât think it classifies as a âdateâ, but I kinda liked it whenever you hung out with me in the clinic while I tended to some patients. Even if your presence there is an occupational hazard in itself.â
He snickers to himself, and you know damn well he still remembers the flock of fangirls that ran into him in the waiting room when Mingyu paid you a visit out of boredom. Thankfully, they were the respectful kind, and promised not to divulge information about Mingyuâs whereabouts whenever they catch him at your clinic.
âThe dogs are always happy to see me,â he chuckles. âThe cats, not so much. Oh, but remember when someone brought in their pet snake? I think that one had a crush on me.â
You do, in fact, remember the day Mingyu got bitten by a boa constrictor named Yujin. Her owner is one of your regulars, since other vets in the city donât have reptiles under their area of expertise. Yujin hasnât bitten anyone since she first came for a checkup, so you figure that Mingyu must have done something pretty stupid to provoke the aggression.Â
âYou better be glad constrictor bites arenât venomous,â you point out with an airy laugh. âNot even a true loveâs kiss can cure a venomous snake bite.âÂ
âIt can cure a handful of other things though.â
You turn to glance at Mingyu with a miffed look at his attempt at smooth-talk. Heâs always been this way, so it doesnât particularly faze you. But it still feels surreal to be talking with him right next to the open sea in your hometown as you both wait for your father to arrive.
âI never really got to ask,â you murmur, eyes still trained on a flock of seagulls huddling together near the docks. âHow are you? Youâre not burning yourself out again, are you?â
You donât see it, but Mingyu smiles to himself. âItâs in our job description to push ourselves past the limit, you know. ButâŚhonestly? Itâs been pretty lonely.â
You make a face at that. âLonely? Youâre literally with twelve other guys, like, eighty percent of the time. How does it ever get lonely?â
Mingyu hums before leaning further over the railing. He looks up at the clear blue sky, breathing deeply with his eyes closed, and for a moment, youâre a bit taken aback by how breathtaking he looks under the spill of morning sunlight.Â
âYou can still get lonely in the middle of all the noise,â he murmurs. âThatâs why I was kind of glad I got to go back here for a while. I know I said I meant to help you out, but there mightâve been some selfish reasoning behind the choice, too.â
Your gaze softens at his words. Mingyu is one of the most intensely passionate members of their group, so itâs not hard to believe that heâs also one of those that ends up feeling this way. You remember having a similar conversation with him during a quiet night in your apartment, limbs tangled together under the sheets as he wonders if your lives would be different if he wasnât an idol.
But of course, itâs your job to remind him that, even if it could become exhausting at times, he once dreamed of being where he is now.Â
âThey probably miss you already,â you say. âDonât you guys usually film content for Chuseok?â
âYeah, but all of thatâs prerecorded. Theyâre all with their families right now, too.âÂ
âReally? What are you doing here then?â you tease.
Mingyu tilts his head to the side, lips curved into a lopsided smile that reminds you how it felt to catch feelings for him the first time.
âWho ever said you arenât family?â
Unfair. Heâs being so fucking unfair right now.
But you canât even think about pushing him into the sea because your father has already made his entrance, waving at the two of you despite his hands being full of fishing paraphernalia.Â
He sulks about how it took you so long to go back home, and you had to explain that things have been extra hectic at your clinic, especially when you inevitably earned the reputation of being âSEVENTEEN Mingyu and Seungkwanâs trusted veterinarianâ despite neither of them having dropped by since the breakup.
You donât tell them that last part though. The last thing you need is for Mingyu to have something to gloat about.
âItâs a miracle how those nasty paparazzi folks from Dispatch havenât caught on yet,â your dad says before climbing into the backseat of Mingyuâs company car. âUnless youâre already in cahoots with them? Remember, Kim Mingyu, leave my daughter out of any celebrity gossip! Sheâs already built a good name for herself.âÂ
A throaty laugh rumbles in Mingyuâs chest as he pulls out into the street. âYou donât have to worry about that, sir. Protecting her has always been my top priority.â
Your father nods, seemingly pleased with his response. âDamn straight.âÂ
You donât express any outward reaction to what Mingyu just told your dad, but you donât resist when he reaches for your hand over the center console.Â
The moment you he squeezes your fingers, you squeeze back.Â
âŚ
The rest of the day is packed with preparing lunch and dinner options for your other relatives in town. Having Mingyu on board is an undeniable asset, since the man knows his way around the kitchen even better than you do. Itâs a little endearing to think that, even if itâs the first time heâs meeting your aunts and uncles and cousins, his personality makes him fit right in.Â
Turns out, one of your cousinsâ daughters is a huge fan, and she couldnât believe her eyes when she saw Kim Mingyu smoking fish in the backyard of your parentsâ house. She made him promise to sign one of her photocards before they leaveâa request that your ex is all too happy to oblige.Â
By dinnertime, most of the guests have already left, and itâs just you, Mingyu, and Haneul sharing the rice wine Mingyu brought for the occasion, with your parents having already retired for the night. You didnât even tell him that your Mom wanted another taste of it, yet he delivered anyway.Â
âHow are you guys doing it?â Haneul whines, a bit red in the face since heâs already had a few beers before your cousins all left. âWhen my ex-girlfriend moved to another city, it only took two weeks for us to break up. Long distance is the bane of everyoneâs existence.â
âEveryone but ours,â Mingyu says before clinking his glass with yours. âYou just have to communicate with each other constantly. If youâre honest about everything both of you are feeling, then itâll be easier to work things out together.â
Itâs so easy for him to say these kinds of things. As if your relationship didnât go to ruin because of the long distance that always kept the two of you apart. You feel a bit bad for having Mingyu lie to your brother right in his face, but you tell yourself that youâre already here anyway.Â
Youâll just have to fake it until you make it.
âBut what if the other party doesnât want to talk about it?â Haneul sighs, tracing the rim of his own glass with his finger. âI wanted to make it work. I really did. But she⌠She didnât even want to try anymore. Lost faith in us so quickly, I could hardly believe she even loved me.â
You know Haneul is just drunkenly rambling about his grievances with his ex. He called you about it a few years ago, long before you even met Mingyu, and you consoled him by saying that his ex-girlfriend never deserved his love in the first place.
But even if you know the circumstances that led to your split with Mingyu are completely different, you canât help but find similarities between the stories.Â
You broke up with Mingyu on the first day of spring. When the snow was just beginning to thaw, and the wind started to bring in a warmer climate. Theyâd just gone back from tour, and you know youâre not the only one feeling the tightly-wound strings of your relationship beginning to fray at the seams.Â
âIâve been thinking about it for a while now, but I donât think weâre going to work, Gyu,â you murmured, not having the guts to meet his eyes. âI think itâs best if we just focused on our careers.â
You thought heâd throw a fit. Or at least ask you a bunch of questions. Did he do something wrong? Is he not enough? Yet Mingyu simply flashed you a sad smile before nodding right back at you.
âOkay,â he said with a kind of resignation that breaks your heart to hear. âThank you for being with me all this time.â
In the present, Mingyu shifts beside you on the tableâabruptly startling you out of that impromptu trip down memory lane.Â
âThen, youâll just have to take it in stride, Haneul-ah,â he murmurs before throwing back the rest of his drink. Mingyu manages a tight-lipped smile that pains you to look at. âIf you really love her, youâll respect whatever choice sheâs come to make in the end. Even if that choice doesnât involve you anymore. Even if it hurts to see her walk away after everything youâve built together.â
When Mingyu turns to look at you, you feel like thereâs cotton sticking to the roof of your mouth.
âItâs a good thing I never have to experience that with your sister, though. She loves me too much to let me go.â
Haneul huffs from across the table before rising to his feet. âYou two are so in love itâs actually disgusting. You know what, letâs just go to sleep.â
Half an hour later, you find yourself standing in the middle of your bedroom as Mingyu gets ready to sleep. He seems to be talking to someone on the phone inside your bathroom, but you purposely decide not to listen in. It was probably his manager or one of the other boys checking in on him.
You donât wait for him to finish when you climb under the sheets, leaving enough space for him to occupy on the mattress, should he decide to share it with you tonight. Thereâs also an extra blanket folded on his side of the bed, since Mingyuâs a notorious blanket hogger, and youâd rather not wrestle that six-foot hunk of muscle for warmth.Â
Mingyu takes so long on that phone call of his that by the time he finishes, youâre already fast asleep, curled up while facing the wall so you wouldnât have to face him. He chuckles, lingering just a few seconds longer by the doorframe of the bathroom. How long has it been since heâs last seen your face under the peaceful guise of slumber?Â
Itâs been too long, and he isnât about to pass up on the opportunity to commit the sight into memory.
âŚ
Sometime in the middle of the night, youâre rudely roused by the sudden drop in temperature.
Itâs only the beginning of autumn, but you noticed that itâs a lot colder than usual. Even if you already have a cozy blanket draped right on top of you. You sigh, shifting on the bed to get more comfortable before realizing that youâre not exactly alone.Â
Much like yourself, Mingyu is blinking out the drowsiness in his eyes as he turns to look at you with a question in his sleepy gaze. You shake your head in a wordless attempt to tell him not to worry.Â
âYouâve been tossing and turning for thirty minutes now,â he says, and hearing his throaty voice in person doesnât even compare to that phone call you shared a week ago. âWhatâs wrong?â
You sigh. âItâs cold, and it isnât even winter yet.â
He looks at you for a while, as if thinking of what to say before he reaches out for you and tugs you into his arms. Even if youâre practically half-asleep, the sudden action kickstarts your brain into motion, and you struggle against his grip all while whispering, âWhat the hell are you doing?!â
âYou told me back then Iâm as good as a furnace on cold days,â he mumbles as he tucks you into his chestâmaking you hyper aware of every ridge of his toned chest through his shirt. âIf it bothers you so much, just think of it as a favor from one friend to another. Howâs that sound?â
Friend. You know thatâs all that Mingyu is to you these days, and all you are to him, but even in this drowsy haze youâre in, the word still feels like an insult. A word meant to scorn the time youâve spent as lovers.Â
Just thinking about Mingyu as a friend leaves a bitter taste in your mouth, so instead of answering him, you cave and burrow yourself into his warmthâsomething that he seems pleased with, if the satisfied sound that rumbles in his chest is anything to go by.Â
He holds you in his arms the same way he did last Christmas, but thereâs an unfamiliar sense of possessiveness sinking uncomfortably in the pit of your stomach. You know you shouldnât think of what heâs doing as anything but a favor between friends. Youâre perfectly aware that, as the person who officially ended things between the both of you, you have no right to yearn for something you already gave up on.
But when Mingyu tilts your head up so you can meet his sleepy eyes, you donât even put up a fight when he presses his lips to yours.
It doesnât seem like he planned on doing anything beyond that. In fact, you donât think he meant to do it at all. Just a heat-of-the-moment decision that the two of you could just forget about come morning.Â
However, the moment he starts to pull away, you force a hand across the back of his head, crushing your lips back together as you hook one of your thighs across his hips. Mingyu groans into the kiss, large hands migrating to your waist as he reciprocates your newfound hunger like you knew he would. His touch leaves trails of fire tingling across your skin, and every time his canines graze your bottom lip, you quietly moan into his mouth.
This is stupid. Youâre both being incredibly stupid. The walls are anything but soundproof, and your parents are sleeping just across the hall.
Yet you canât bring yourself to care. Not when Mingyu is making your body remember what it feels like to have him all over you like this.
You missed him. His heat. His touch. His kiss. Everything. You missed him so much that it hurts. You missed him so much that when Mingyuâs fingers start to glide along the exposed flesh of your thighs, you detach your lips from his before pushing him away.
You missed Kim Mingyu with the intensity of a dying star collapsing in on itself, of black holes tearing through reality, but this isnât how you should go about it.
âLetâsâŚâ you whisper, not quite trusting your voice to carry out your message. âLetâs just sleep.â
Mingyu doesnât argue. He rarely does. But neither do you when he tugs you back in the caging embrace of his warmth.Â
For the first time in weeks, you find yourself drifting off into undisturbed slumber.
âŚ
The next morning, youâre set to go back to Seoul, and by some stroke of luck, so is Mingyu. Still, the two of you decide to stick around until lunch timeâneither of you breathing a word about what just happened last night.
But while Mingyu starts to load both of your things into the trunk of his car, your mother asks you for a favor at the last minute.
âCan you bring Namja along with you back to the city?â she asks. âHeâs been really listless before you and Mingyu arrived. Your father and I were starting to get worried, and figured you might have to do a check up first.â
You raise an eyebrow at her claim, not really noticing anything amiss about your retrieverâs health, aside from the usual signs of age. Heâs ten years old, turning eleven this year, so it isnât such a mystery to see that Namja isnât as hyperactive as he was as a puppy. But then again, your mother has spot-on intuition about all the strangest things, so you indulge her request in the end.Â
Besides, having a pet of your own to keep you company doesnât sound so bad.
Fortunately, Mingyu is more than hospitable when you ask if you could bring Namja along for the rideâpromising that heâs car-trained, and wonât make a mess as long as you pull over from time to time. In fact, your ex seems more elated with the idea of your goldie joining the road trip than you are.
âI can come visit Namja in Seoul whenever I want now, right?â he asks with a soft laugh, and you wanted to reply with, Yeah, if you arenât always so far away, that is, but choose not to.Â
The two of you take shifts in driving as usual. Whoever isnât behind the wheel is in charge of entertaining Namja in the backseat so he wouldnât end up whining for attention the whole drive back. Itâs a setup that youâre pretty okay with, since it minimizes any sort of window for you and Mingyu to have a conversation. God knows youâre not exactly ready to talk aboutâŚwhatever happened last night.Â
So instead, you ask him about a bunch of trivial things so he doesnât get any ideas.
âYou sure your manager is okay with you returning the car while it reeks of Namja?â you laugh before switching lanes on the freeway. âHe might not take the news that he sheds very lightly.âÂ
Mingyu chuckles before scratching behind Namjaâs ears. âI promised Iâd have it cleaned before I returned it to the office building. Donât worry about it.â
âHm. Whatever you say.â
By your third stop-over, you decide to give Namja some food and water while Mingyu gets takeout for the both of you at a nearby fast food chain. You stretch out your limbs while your retriever happily laps from his water bowl, wondering how much longer itâs going to take before you reach Seoul.Â
Before you have to part ways with Mingyu again.
Youâre startled out of your train of thought when you see Mingyu practically sprinting back to the car, his sunglasses nearly falling off the bridge of his nose. Namja glances up at him quizzically, and you have to stifle a laugh.
âYeah, a bunch of fans spotted me in line, so we might have to get food back in the city instead,â he explains hurriedly as he helps tidy up Namjaâs food and water bowls. âLetâs go. Iâll drive.â
After his meal, Namja is sated and sleepyâcontent with resting his head on your thigh as you watch the streetlights blur past the windows. Mingyu is a much faster driver than you are, so heâs able to cut the travel time shorter than it would have been had it been you behind the wheel. But the lack of anything to do has you quietly staring at Mingyu from the backseat while his eyes are glued to the road.
You canât help but let your gaze linger on his strong arms, and the fact that you were tucked safely between them the night prior. But thatâs your first mistake because now, youâre thinking about those desperate kisses you shared in the privacy of your room. Touching each other like you both feared the other would disappear if you didnât pull them close enough.
You shake your head. No. This isnât how friends should think about each other.Â
Whatever happened back in Haenam, youâre just going to have to leave it there.
Itâs already past eight in the evening when Mingyu eases the car into your neighborhood, and you try not to think much of the fact that he still knows where you live.Â
âGuess that concludes our weekend getaway,â Mingyu says the moment he finishes helping you carry your stuff back inside your apartment. âThough it seems that someoneâs getting pretty cozy really quickly.â
Namja is already familiarizing himself with his new home, wandering around the living room all while sniffing everything in his path. You stifle a soft laugh.
âYeah. I guess it is,â you murmur before managing a kind smile. âThanks for having my back, Mingyu. ItâŚmeans a lot. Really, it does.â
He laughs softly, eyes trailing around the living room with a curiosity that isnât so different from Namjaâs. âYou have your first boyfriend with you now. I can rest easy knowing youâre in good company.â
Your face flushes at the thought that Mingyu still remembers the reasoning behind Namjaâs namesake. Namjachingu. When he was still a puppy, you said Namja was your first boyfriend, and that you didnât need anyone else.Â
He lived up to his title for years, tooâalways acting hostile around past boyfriends that you did end up bringing to your parentsâ house despite coming from a friendly breed. The only boyfriend that your first boyfriend seemed to approve of is the man standing right in front of you, just when you thought you would never see him again within the four corners of your house.
âYou know,â Mingyu begins, hesitation crossing his face for a split second before he meets your eyes. âMy familyâs in Seoul for Chuseok, too. I told Minseo to bring Bobpul and Baptori, and you might want to schedule a little playdate between my kids and yours.âÂ
You raise an eyebrow. âWhereâs Aji?â
âToo old to travel around,â he chuckles. âBut Iâm sure the other two can keep Namja company just fine. Join us tomorrow for dinner. What do you say?âÂ
You hesitate. This shouldâve been where you drew the line. Mingyu has already helped you out of your initial predicament. You really shouldnât create any more problems for yourself by joining his family for a late Chuseok dinner. In factâŚ
âWhat, you havenât told your family that we split either?â you ask, half-jokingly, half-seriously.
âNo, they know.â Mingyu shakes his head. âBut theyâve always liked you too, so I see no harm in getting everyone to hang out in one place.â
You shoot him a pointed look. âYou know this is just going to make things more complicated, right?â
When he flashes you that toothy grin, you already know that this is a losing battle.Â
âIt does, but itâs still going to be fun,â he says. âSo, are you coming?âÂ
Sometimes, you wish you never met Mingyu at all. Maybe your life wouldnât be so fucking difficult.
âFine.â
âŚ
The next day, you bring Namja to the clinic, and Chae is more than happy to see the brand new addition to the workforce. But while sheâs giving your goldie more pets than he probably deserves, you ask if you have any clients coming this morning that called in advance.
âOh, thereâs this one guy whoâs bringing in a maltese today,â she says, laughing a little when Namja whines at the fact that her attention is divided. âI think his name was⌠Seungkwan? Something like that. He has some records from last year, but he hasnât been back since.â
Seungkwanâs coming today? Huh. Talk about coincidence.
You tell Chae about how Seungkwan and Mingyu belong to the same group, and your receptionist is adept enough to catch on to what youâre trying to say. Sheâs all too quick to suggest plans on how to mitigate the fans from flocking the entrance to the clinic, like that one time when Mingyu was too lax in disguising himself from anyone who could recognize him.Â
But when Seungkwan arrives at your door, you remember that heâs one of the members that doesnât particularly like being crowded by people, even if they are his fans.
Heâs dressed discreetlyâdark shades, a beanie, and a black face maskâwhile carrying an adorable pet carrier thatâs probably worth half your monthly salary. Seungkwan is so straight-to-the-point with carrying out his business with you, that itâs hard to believe you and him used to joke around like old friends a year ago.Â
But for some reason, when Chae excuses herself to answer a phone call, the façade he puts up falls apart in seconds.
âNoona, you have no idea how much I missed you!â he wails before throwing his arms around you. âOther vets just donât cut it for Bookkeu! Theyâre always either too mean or too lax with her. You handled her just right today. Canât believe Mingyu-hyung always calls you her worst enemy.â
You chuckle before patting his back, and Seungkwan pulls away with a pout on his face. âHey, you guys are the ones who ghosted me after Mingyu and I broke up. Youâre always welcome to come back to have your pets checkedânon-showbiz girlfriend or not.âÂ
âThat hyung of mine is stupid,â Seungkwan scoffs as he scoops Bookkeu into his arms. âWell, youâre kind of the same way, but I canât exactly call you stupid or you might take it out on Bookkeuââ
âI would do no such thing, Seungkwan-ah,â you complain.Â
âOkay, itâs just my personal opinion that maybe you two didnât have to split up at all,â he huffs. âMingyu-hyung has become more and more listless since you broke up with him. He might look like his usual self on camera, but when weâre not recording anything? Heâs always so lost in thought! It gets on Coups-hyungâs nerves sometimes.â
Listless, huhâŚÂ
Your mother said the exact same thing about Namja. Speaking of, your gaze drifts over to your goldie whoâs staring outside the door to your clinic, like heâs waiting for Chae to come back and shower him with attention again.Â
Is Seungkwan insinuating that he and Mingyu arenât so different?
âMaybe heâs just going through a blue period,â you suggest before writing up a prescription for the vitamins that Bookkeu will have to take for the next two weeks. âItâs been so long since we broke up. I doubt heâs acting that way because of me.â
Seungkwan breathes in deeply, like heâs just barely able to contain the urge to slap some sense into you. âNoona, listen to me. Kim Mingyu is catastrophically in love with you. When you called that night when we were sharing a hotel room in New York, it was the first time I saw him look so genuinely happy for reasons that arenât related to our music. But that hyung of mine is too selfless for his own good.â
You startle a bit when he suddenly lifts Bookkeu closer to you and points her adorable face in your line of sight.Â
âHe wants you back, but heâll never admit it, especially when you made your choice clear all those months ago,â Seungkwan says before pushing his maltese even closer to you. âBut now, something tells me that youâre still hung up on him, just as much as heâs hung up on youâif all the things he told me about your trip to Haenam are true, that is.â
Huh. That time he took so long in the bathroom⌠He mustâve been talking to Seungkwan.
âOkay, but why does it feel like youâre using Bookkeu to threaten me into doing something?â You laugh softly. âSeungkwan, our time is up. And itâs not something we can just take back whenever we feel like it.â
âWhâ! Donât you think things are only that way because both of you are making it more complicated than it should be?â He sighs, exasperated. âAlso, yes I am using Bookkeu to threaten you. Promise that youâll at least talk to Mingyu-hyung about this? We canât stand seeing him so out of it anymore. Come on, you canât resist those cute puppy eyes, right?â
You sigh, half-considering pointing out that Bookkeu is, by no means, a puppy anymore, but then again, you still call Namja that despite being more than a decade old.
âAlright, alright,â you relent. âIâm meeting his family tonight for dinner anyways. Might as well clear the air.â
Seungkwan gasps, a comical expression rooting itself on his face. âSee! Youâre having dinner with his family, too?! If youâre not back together by the time we fly back to the U.S., I'm never talking to either of you ever again.â
Now, itâs your turn to pout. âWho are you going to go to for Bookkeuâs check-ups then?â
He opens his mouth, closes it, then opens it again before letting out a petulant huff. You canât help the snicker that bubbles in your chest as Seungkwan tilts his chin up with indignance.Â
âPoint taken,â he says before narrowing his eyes and pointing his index finger at you. âBut Iâm expecting Kim Mingyu to come back to the dorms later, happy and not heartbroken. Okay?âÂ
You raise your hands before handing him your written prescription. âNo promises.â
When Chae returns inside the clinic, you physically have to hold Namja down just so she can give Seungkwan a receipt for todayâs visit. Your mother was right, he definitely was growing lonely back in Haenam. You havenât seen him this excited in years.Â
Seungkwan bids you another, more formal goodbye, now that you're not alone anymore. He doesnât need to reiterate what he asked of you out loudâthe look in his eyes is already telling enough.Â
Given that today is a bit of a slow day, you decide to run a few diagnostic tests on Namja just to confirm whether or not heâs silently carrying some sort of disease. But all his results came out normal, except for a clinically insignificant but still noticeable increase in his body sodium levels. Might have to cut down the treats for a few days.Â
Otherwise, heâs happy and healthy tenâgoing elevenâyears into his lifespan. The reason for his lethargy back home must have something to do with innate loneliness after all.
Then you remember what Seungkwan told you about Mingyu. How he hasnât really been himself since the breakup. You never really felt that during your time together in your hometown. Heâs still the effortless charmer that you once fell in love with. The big softie that can get along with anyone and everyone, given the right circumstances.
Mingyu has always been a people pleaser. The last thing he wants to do is inconvenience others. So itâs kind of hard to believe that heâs been so out of it that even Seungcheol is starting to get pissed with his behavior.Â
The sound of Namja barking jolts you out of your thoughts before your goldie pads over to where youâre seated behind your desk, whining as he nuzzles your hands as if he knows youâre thinking a bit too hard about something distressful. You let out a quiet laugh, scratching behind his ears just like you know he likes.
âI wonder what Iâm supposed to do,â you chuckle. âMaybe I shouldâve been born as a dog instead. Thinking about all of this is giving me a headache.â
Namja growls before barking again. Like he doesnât approve of the idea of not having you as his fur parent. You let out another laugh thatâs a lot less quiet before you decide to pull out your phone and shoot Mingyu a text.
Are you picking me up later or not?
âŚ
Dinner with Mingyuâs family is splendid
The outdoor restaurant his mother booked in advance probably serves the best songpyeon youâve ever tasted in your life. Add that to the fact that they accommodate pets in their alfresco area, this could easily be one of the next places youâll take your own parents for a meal when you bring them to Seoul for a quick getaway.Â
Namja is a bit shy around other animalsâa result of being around no one but your family for so long. But when Minseo introduces him to both Bobpul and Baptori at the same time, the two little rascals easily coaxed your senior citizen goldie out of his shell. Next thing you know, theyâre running around the outdoor dining area like a bunch of energetic pups.
âUnnie, are you back together with this guy?â Minseo asks in the middle of dessert, pointing her spoon accusingly at Mingyu. âYou can do so much better than him, though.â
Their father laughs at their youngestâs comment, and their mother rubs Mingyuâs back as if she agrees, yet still wishes to console her son regardless. Mingyu is simply scowling at his family for how quick they are to throw him under the bus.
âShut up, you sound just like Seungkwan,â he whines.Â
âWell, weâre both right.â
You let out a laugh of your own before scooping some ice cream into your mouth. Then, tentatively, you say, âDonât say that. Gyu wasnât that terrible of a boyfriend, you know?âÂ
âHeâs always so busy though. Doesnât even have time to come visit Bobpul and our other dogs anymore,â Minseo sulks. âHe even missed my graduation! Can you believe it?â
Mingyu pouts. âI said I was sorry, didnât I?âÂ
She huffs. âNot sorry enough!â
âWell, for starters, even if he is ridiculously busy, he still makes sure to call me before he goes to bed after a particularly tough schedule,â you say. âHe also answers my calls even if our time zones are different, and itâs an ungodly hour where he currently is. Then when he finally comes back to Korea, heâll give a bunch of gifts that reminded him of me on his trip overseas.â
You donât know what compelled you to do so, but the words just gush out naturally. It was a little difficult the first time Mingyu had to hop on a plane to some other country to film some content with the boys, but you eventually got used to it, and managed to make a couple work-arounds.
Now that you think about it, if you were so used to it, whyâd you decide it was best for you to part ways when he got back from tour? Itâs been so long that you donât even know the logic behind the reasoning anymore. You just remember feeling like it was the best decision at the time. And you were rightâyour careers have definitely thrived even after the breakup.
As you continue telling Minseo and their parents about how much of a catch the eldest son of the Kim family really is, you fail to notice the way Mingyuâs eyes never leave you the entire time. Soft, with just a hint of yearning that youâll only be able to notice if you knew what you were looking for.Â
âUgh, fine,â Minseo huffs, and you donât think she and Seungkwan are all that different from each other. âThis is the first time Iâve seen a couple thatâs broken up months ago talk about each other so fondly, still. You sure you two arenât secretly dating again?â
âMinseo,â their mother scolds before flashing you an apologetic look. âIâm sorry about her. Minseoâs just been really snappy lately. Must be because she missed Mingyu here very much.â
She rolls her eyes. âAs if Iâll miss that credit-grabbing punk. He didnât even acknowledge me in his latest Instagram post!â
âSpeaking of dating again,â their father interjects before taking a sip of his wine. âMinseoâs right about one thing at least. You and Mingyu still have chemistry after so long. Whatâs stopping you from getting back together again?â
At your side, Mingyu flashes his father a cautionary look. âDad, thatâs a really inappropriate question, donât you think?â
âOh, yes, of course. My apologies. This old man is really justâŚcurious, so to speak.âÂ
He bows his head slightly, and you make a little gesture that insists you took no offense. But the inquiry definitely made you think for a moment.
Itâs like everyone you know completely supports the idea of you and Mingyu just burying the hatchet and rekindling your relationship. But didnât they consider the logistics of it? Youâre a full-time vet and Mingyuâs a full-time idol that travels out of Korea at least once a month. Though youâre a bit unsure of it now, that still played a part in why you called it quits in the first place.
Even when Mingyu took it upon himself to drive you and Namja back to your apartment, his fatherâs question still lingers in the back of your mind.Â
Whatâs stopping you from getting back together again?Â
The answer is pretty simple, but itâs not something youâre ready to face just yet.
Itâs you. Youâre the only one keeping yourselves from reigniting what you once thought was already lost. Your guilt. Your regrets. Your fears. You didnât need a verbal confirmation to know that Mingyu would drop everything in a heartbeat if it meant youâll take him back again. But as much as your friends joke about how you deserve better than Mingyu, youâre convinced itâs the other way around.
Mingyu deserves someone who can reciprocate the love heâs so willing to give tenfold. Someone who doesnât flake out when he needs them most.Â
Someone who isnât you.
When he pulls over a red light, he lets out a sigh as he checks the text messages that popped up on his phone. After a few scrolls he says, âOh. Jeonghan-hyung texted about some party in Gangnam. Do you want toââ
âGyu,â you whisper, eyes riveted on the busy street. âWhat are we doing?â
He blinks. âCelebrating Chuseok together?â
âBut weâre friends right?â You laugh somewhat bitterly. âFriends donât normally celebrate the entirety of their Chuseok weekend bonding with each otherâs families. Friends donât make out with each other in the middle of the night. AndâŚâ
You let out a shuddering sigh before adding, âFriends donât look at each other the way you look at me.â
You can clearly hear the sound of his breath hitching even if you donât turn to look at him. It seems like he was about to say something in return, but the stoplight turns green, and heâs back to pulling his focus on the road instead of you.
In the backseat, you can hear Namja whiningâever the empath, that one. You immediately feel him pawing against your seat, as if silently asking whatâs wrong. Turning around, you give him a few reassuring pats, not wanting to get claw marks all over Mingyuâs borrowed car.
The two of you are completely silent as he walks you back to the front door of your apartment. You know he didnât have to, yet he did anyway. How Mingyu of him.
When you finally muster the courage to look up at him and bid him good night, Mingyu grabs your wristâforcing you to meet his desperate gaze.Â
âIf I told you I wanted you back, would anything change? No, right?â he whispers, voice tinged with so much emotion, you can feel your own heart ache at the sound of it. âSo Iâm sorry if Iâm being selfish for inviting you to every place I could think of. If I want to spend as much time with you as I can because I know I wonât ever get the chance to do so if I let this pass.â
When he presses your foreheads together, the look in his eyes is so smoldering, you canât bear to look away. This is what a man thatâs been yearning for you for months looks like, it seems.Â
And you donât think you can keep resisting him for long.
âBefore I get thrown back into that haywire of a schedule again,â he whispers, and you feel every breath fan across your skin, âcanât you at least let me have this? Let me have you?âÂ
You donât even know who it is that lunges in for the kiss. The next thing you know, Mingyu has you pressed up against your front door, devouring your lips where all your neighbors can see. But you donât care. Not when heâs desperately holding your body flush against his as you reclaim whatâs always been yours.
He whispers a bunch of things along the column of your neck as he loosens the strings holding your dress together from behind. Some sweet, some endearing, and others a touch too filthy for others to hear aloud. You stifle your little gasps when he wraps a strong arm around your waist, nudging your thighs apart with his knees so you can feel the hardness straining against his middle.
âItâs you,â he murmurs against your feverish skin, teeth grazing across your flesh ever-so lightly. âItâs always been you. And it will always be you.âÂ
You know Mingyu is a good actor. But itâs so earth-shatteringly different to hear the raw desperation in his voice. How earnest he is in telling you just how much he still loves you without saying the words outright. You can only dream of being as honest with your true feelings as he is.Â
But tonight, you donât think thereâs anything wrong with letting yourself fall.
In the midst of your mounting desire for each other, though, a lone whine in the night snaps both you and Mingyu out of your newfound vigor. You nearly forgot about Namja, whoâs impatiently waiting for either of you to open the front door so he can finally take a nap. You glance at Mingyu, and he glances right back, before the two of you burst out laughing like a couple of teenagers without a care in the world.
Once youâve gotten your needy retriever settled outside, Mingyu practically tosses you on the bed the moment the door to your room clicks shutâall too eager to cage you between his arms as he continues where you left off.Â
The suit he wore tonight looked a bit too good on his frame, but now you want nothing more than to claw it off him. He chuckles, sensing your desperation as he shrugs off his coat and unbuttons his dress shirt along the way.
âI donât remember you being this desperate for me, sweetheart,â he murmurs, leaning down to grasp your face as he strokes your heated skin with his thumb. âI canât say I hate the development though.â
âMingyu,â you whimper as you guide his thumb to your lips, suckling on it in a way that you know makes him lose his mind every time. âPlease. I want you.âÂ
Itâs so easy to be honest with yourself. You wonder why youâve struggled with doing that for so long, but then you remember that your brain is fogged with desire for the man thatâs currently staring you down like heâs doing everything in his power not to fuck you into the mattress right away.Â
But at that moment, you throw all logic and caution in the wind in exchange for taking even more of Mingyuâs thick fingers into your mouth.
âSo good for me,â he whispers when he sees you inch your knees apart to welcome him in between. The hand thatâs not being fellated by your tongue finds its way to the apex of your thighsâcupping your clothed heat in a way that makes you moan around his fingers. âHow badly do you want me, sweet thing?â
âSo, so badly,â you manage to wrench out despite your mouth being full, rutting your hips to introduce some friction between your aching pussy and his hand. âPlease, GyuâŚâ
When heâs satisfied, his free hand migrates to your thighs, spreading you further apart as he brings his lubricated fingers to your sopping core. Thereâs something so fucking hot in the way he just nudges your panties to the sideâgroaning when he finds you already soaked for him.Â
âYou need something to stretch out this pretty little pussy, donât you?â he murmurs into your ear, nipping at the lobe just the way you like it. âYou want my fingers or my cock, babygirl? Better choose wisely.â
You want to say that youâre too fucking horny for foreplay, but also remember that each time you had sex with Mingyu in the past, the stretch of his massive cock can be quite uncomfortable if he doesnât prep you. With how long itâs been since youâve laid in bed together, you donât want to rush into it without thinking of the consequences after.
So, you mewl, âFingers first. Then your cock.â
Mingyu laughsâa deep, sexy soundâbefore planting a kiss on your nose. âThatâs my girl.â
He carefully eases one digit into your hole, eyes never leaving your face as he gauges your reactions. Part of you wishes to tell him that he doesnât have to worry so much. That you still trust him with your own body even after all this time. You donât say anything aloud, but Mingyu seems to get the gist from the look in your eyes either way, surging forward so he can press his lips back onto yours as he loosens you up.
âYouâre always so quick to get wet for me, baby,â he sighs, stifling the noise that escapes you when he slides in a second finger to test the resistance of your walls. âYouâve no idea how much I missed this. Missed you .â
âGyu, Iââ Your breath hitches once he curls his fingers just so, making your legs rise involuntarily off the mattress, but Mingyu pins one of your thighs down with his free hand.Â
âWhat was that?â
Heâs teasing. He rarely ever does that. You shoot him a petulant look before taking his bottom lip between your teeth, tugging hard enough to coax a groan out of him.Â
âI missed you, too,â you whisper. âYouâre the only one who can make me feel this good.â
A dozen emotions flit through Mingyuâs face in the span of a millisecond, but the one that remains is something not so different from longing. You hear him sigh a couple of words that you donât quite catch before heâs taking his fingers out of your sopping cunt and pulling away from you. Just when youâre about to voice out a complaint, he starts undoing his trousers, kicking them away to some uncharted part of your bedroom before working on the rest of his dress shirt.
Not-so-newsflash: your ex-boyfriend is still fucking hot.Â
But he doesnât seem to notice the way youâre reacting to the sultry way in which he peels his clothes offâdark eyes still trained on your pliant form on the bed. As Mingyu palms himself through his boxers, you canât help but press your thighs together in anticipation of whatâs to come.Â
There was a time when he railed you so good, you legitimately couldnât walk straight the next day. You wonder if he plans on reenacting the whole thing tonight.
âLetâs get you out of that dress, sweetheart,â he breathes before gently guiding you back into a seated position, tugging at the hem of your dress before tossing it to the side.Â
You feel your cheeks warm when he stares at the underwear set you have on tonight. Plain cotton panties and plain cotton bra. In your defense, you really didnât expect to get laid tonight.Â
âDoesnât matter,â Mingyu chuckles. Itâs either he can read minds or he still knows you well enough to figure out what youâre thinking. âIâm taking everything off anyways.â
As he makes quick work of whatâs left of your clothing, you distantly remember the last conversation you had with Seungkwan. How you told him youâd âclear the airâ with Mingyu right after having dinner with his family.
Youâre pretty sure what youâre doing right now is only blurring the lines even more, but you donât really fucking care right now.
You let out a hushed moan when Mingyu latches his mouth onto your nipple, massaging your other breast as he swirls the appendage across your sensitive skin. His free arm snakes itself behind the curve of your waist, pressing you against his firm body while rutting his hips against the bed.Â
Heâs just as desperate for you as you are for him, and it fills you with a heady sort of hunger that only Mingyu can alleviate.
âCan I?â he whispers.
You feel his teeth graze across the skin of your chest, making your toes curl with anticipation. Itâs been a while, but you canât easily forget how much of a biter Mingyu is in bed. He loves leaving his marks on your body, and even if you always complain about how hard it is to cover them up, you let him do as he pleases every single time.
âYes,â you whimper, rubbing your bare pussy against the ridge of his abs. âDo whatever you want with me, Gyu.â
The sound you let out once he finally bites down is caught between a yelp and a moan, your fingers threading across his hair as he suckles on your skin. Heâs such a talker in bed, tooâwhispering all sorts of endearments that are too soft for you to hear, but add fuel to your growing desire regardless.
âSo fucking pretty,â he says once he detaches himself from your breasts and marvels at his own work. The fruit of his effort is yet to become visible, but heâs left enough angry red marks on your skin to guarantee the lovebites theyâll turn into come morning. âAnd itâs all for me.â
Lacing your fingers around his nape, you mold your lips together in another kiss, tongues dancing to the rhythm of your erratic heartbeat as you grind yourself against his toned stomach.Â
âMingyu,â you whimper against his mouthâhot and heavy. âI need you inside me. Need to get stretched on your cock.â
He groans again, fisting your hair so that he can kiss you even deeper. As he busies you with his mind-numbing kisses, Mingyu gets rid of his boxers in a flashâpositioning himself between your thighs. You nearly cry out when you feel the fat head of his cock sliding against your soaking slit. When he grazes your sensitive clit, you couldâve sworn tears started together in the corners of your eyes.
âFuck, babygirl, so fucking wet for me,â he sighs as he lays you back down on the bed and eases your knees further apart.Â
You bite your lip at the sight of his cock, still as long and girthy as you remember. Mingyu pumps his length all while sliding the head across your cunt, but you let out another desperate mewl to just fuck you already.Â
âShhh,â he says, leaning down to plant a chaste kiss on your forehead. âLet me take my time with you, sweetheart. I want you to commit all of this to memory. Gonna have you feeling me inside you for days.â
And you donât doubt that. Kim Mingyu has a knack for making it hard for people to forget about him, and if he plans to fuck the shape of his cock into your pussy, who are you to complain?
When you feel his cock catch across your entrance, you genuinely wonder if itâs going to hurt. Mingyuâs attempt at foreplay was cut halfway through because he got distracted by his sudden desire to leave a trail of love bites all over your breasts. But the thing about having sex with Mingyu is that your comfort is his top priority.Â
He would never do anything that he knows can hurt you.
âIâll go slow, alright?â he whispers, and all you can manage is a nod. âWords, baby. You have to talk to me so Iâll know if you really want it.â
âGyu,â you whine, arching your hips in a feeble attempt to get him to fuck into you. âIâm alright. Anything you do is alright with me, justâ Please. Please fuck me full.â
He sighs, staring down like he doesnât know what to do with you before finally, finally, you feel his dick breach your entranceâpushing inch by delicious inch inside you with restrained hunger. You fist the sheets at the familiar stretch, but itâs not so uncomfortable that the sensation burns. Youâve taken Mingyuâs cock dozens of times before, and it seems that your body still knows how to accommodate his ridiculous size.
âPretty pussyâs happy to see me again,â he chuckles, his grip on your thighs tightening ever-so slightly. âStill made to fit me so snuggly. Did you miss my cock, sweet thing? I can feel you pulsing around me.â
âYes,â you drawl. âMissed your cock so fucking much, Gyu. Fuckââ
You feel so hot, so full. Itâs like Mingyuâs the only thing youâve ever knownâsurrounding you in every direction until all that floats in your lust-addled mind are the letters of his name. Once he buries himself to the hilt, Mingyu doesnât move right away, still so attentive to your reactions that even if you want nothing more than for him to rail you into the mattress, he wonât press forward until heâs sure youâre ready.
âIs it too much?â he whispers, tucking your hair behind your ear. âDo you need more time to get used to me?â
Something similar to a growl reverberates in your chest as you stare at Mingyu hard. âWhat I need isâŚfor you to fuck me until I black out.â
Mingyuâs lips turn up into a grin as he shakes his head. âBaby, the last thing I want to be is some sex-deprived savage after weâve been apart for so long. I donât want to hurt you.â
Then, he leans forward on the bed again, bringing his lips right next to your ear.
âBut I can still make you feel good.â
He prefaces the words with a powerful thrust that you donât expect, splaying your thighs further until theyâre flat against the mattress. The slide of his cock still feels so unbelievably good that even if the sudden stretch shouldâve been uncomfortable, youâre too blindsided by the pleasure to notice.Â
Your eyes trail across the beautiful man above you as he fucks you in his favorite position. Mingyu has always had a thing for missionaryâsomething about wanting to see your face as he wrecks you. You think youâre starting to share the same sentiment because not only do you get to see his fat cock slide in and out of your sopping cunt, but you can admire all of him at once, as well.
The exertion in those toned arms with every forward thrust. The conspicuous outline of his pecs. That toned fucking stomach. That gorgeous fucking face, so lost in the velvet heat of your pussyâ
Why did you ever think letting someone like this go was a good idea?
âYouâre going to laugh at me for this but,â Mingyu breathes, chuckling to himself. âI think Iâm kinda close.âÂ
You do laugh, but itâs quickly silenced when one of his fingers finds your clit, rubbing it in quick, precise circles like he hasnât forgotten how to get you off after all this time.
âI am, too,â you tell him. âCock so fucking good, you can make me come in minutes.â
Mingyu lets out another guttural noise as he presses your knees to your chest, throwing your legs over his shoulder with a look in his eyes that promises nothing but pleasure. Though his fingers have departed your puffy clit, the angle he has you bent in has his cock easily grazing your g-spot with every thrustâreducing you into a pathetic, mewling mess underneath him.
âYour pussyâs a fucking drug, babygirl,â he sighs. âHavenât wanted anyone else after you.â
Even in your cock-drunk haze, those words bring forth some semblance of clarity within you. But itâs immediately snuffed out when Mingyu amps up the cadence of his thrusts, fucking into you with the intention of bringing you to completion at the same time he achieves it. Your eyes are screwed shut, fingers finding purchase across the ripping muscles of his back as you babble an incoherent mantra of yes, yes, so close, so fucking close, love how you fuck me, love how you make me feel fullâ
And then, itâs overâa white hot flash like stars bursting behind your eyelids. You curl into Mingyuâs embrace as your orgasm washes over you like a tidal wave, and heâs all too glad to help you ride it out, pistoning inside your spasming walls with a rhythm thatâs starting to stagger.Â
âSo goddamn tight,â he growls. âWhere do you want my cum, sweetheart?â
Youâre still too blissed out to give him a proper response, but from the way your legs tighten themselves around his waist, Mingyu figures that thatâs the green light he needs to make a mess out of you. Mingyu sighs, burying his face in the crook of your neck before biting downâhis cock twitching in the heat of your cunt as his release gushes into you in thick globs.
He comes so much that when Mingyu does pull out of your abused pussy, his essence trickles out of your hole as you do your best to catch your breath. The world is just starting to return to its normal axis in your vision, and the first thing that your eyes focus on is the sight of Mingyu smiling at you so fondly, it makes your heart hurt.
The look scares you. Like heâs about to say something that you donât know how to respond to.Â
So instead of giving him any leeway for conversation, you tug him back down into a tongue-filled kiss, rubbing your ruined pussy across his still hard length as you mewl against his lips.
âMore,â you whimper. âI need more, Gyu.â
And heâs all too happy to oblige.
Mingyu slides himself back inside you with an ease that wasnât present earlierâyour mixed arousal acting as a good enough lubricant to accommodate him. His erratic breathing as he fucks his cum deeper inside you only serves to turn you on even more, making another orgasm creep ever-so slightly beneath your skin.Â
âBabygirl canât get enough of this cock, can you?â he sighs. âSeems to me like your pussy never wants me to leave.â
âYes!â you hiss, moving your hips in time with his as you desperately claw at his back. âLove your cock so much, pleaseââ
âCome for me again, sweet thing, I know you can do it.â
Itâs unbelievable how a few choice words can get your body to submit to his whims without much thought. Unlike your first orgasm, the second one that Mingyu coaxes out of you singes through every functional nerve-ending in your bodyâsending you into a flurry of overstimulation that has you twitching under his touch.Â
Just when you thought Mingyuâs finally done with you, however, he suddenly flips you onto your stomachâpressing your chest against the mattress while your ass is high in the air. The sudden change in positions makes your head spin, but youâre too dazed to protest.
When you glance over your shoulder, heâs showing you that same smile you fell in love with a lifetime ago.
âYou can give me a few more orgasms, right, baby?âÂ
When he slides his still hard cock along your swollen cunt, you groan into the sheetsâhaving momentarily forgotten that Mingyuâs stamina can go until morning. If you donât stop him now, he might actually fuck you until you black out, despite his earlier refutal.
But honestly? Youâre not against the idea. Not one bit.
âŚ
When you wake up the following day, itâs to cold sheets and the startling clarity of Mingyuâs absence.
You never minded living alone. Youâve been doing it since your first year of college here in Seoul. Youâre used to waking up with nothing but the silence of your room to keep you company.
Even when you eventually got together with Mingyu, lonely mornings have always been a staple, especially on days where he has early schedules. It fills you with a sinking feeling to see that he isnât with you, but youâve learned to take it in stride.Â
BesidesâŚitâs not like youâre together anymore now.
This is what you wanted, right? For him to not treatâŚwhatever this is as if itâs a relationship thing. The two of you were just heavily pent up, and caved into your mutual desires last night. Thereâs nothing more to it.
However, when you pad outside the bedroom after shrugging on a flimsy oversized shirt, the scent of pancakes and frying eggs fills your nose. When you see Namja sitting right next to a tall figure hunched over your stove, you can hardly believe your eyes.
He doesnât notice you right awayâtoo preoccupied with making the perfect breakfast to pick up on your presence. Namja, however, is more perceptive, glancing behind and perking up at the sight of you. He lets out an excited bark before skidding over to where youâre standing, and you crouch down to the floor so you can give him a tight hug.
âOh, youâre awake!â
Mingyu faces you with a smile thatâs nearly blinding in the morning light, a spatula in one hand and a kitchen mitt in the other. Itâs the exact same scene that youâre greeted with during lazy weekends where he doesnât have any work to do, and your chest twists yet again at the memory.
âYeah, I am.â You smile, rubbing Namjaâs belly when he sprawls himself on the floor. âWhat are you still doing here? Donât you have to go back to New York tonight?â
âYes, but itâs still morning,â he points out, and you roll your eyes.
A few minutes later, Mingyu starts to set the table while you wash your hands. He tells you about how Seungkwan doesnât want to room with him anymore over breakfast because Mingyu takes so long to close the lights when heâs binging a new drama. You tell him to be more considerate of his roommates or they might just dropkick him off the hotel room balcony in his sleep.
When you help him put away the dishes, the sight is soâŚdomestic, it gives you whiplash. Bumping shoulders, splashing water, stifling mutual laughter... Being with him like this, tucked in your own little pocket of happiness makes your heart soar in ways that not even mind-blowing sex can help you attain.
You pray that Mingyu doesnât breathe a word about it, but of course things donât always go your way.
Just when youâre about to turn around to give Namja her morning fix of dog food, you find yourself trapped between the sink and Mingyuâs armsâunable to escape the fondness in his eyes even if you tried.
âI think,â he whispers, âwe can still make this work. You and me.â
You bite the inside of your cheek. âGyuâŚâ
You think so, too. With someone as understanding and compassionate as Mingyu, you know nothingâs impossible if you just quit being so stubborn. You were so afraid of him attempting to bring your relationship back to life last night, butâŚ
Seeing him bathing under the sunlight in your kitchen after months of getting used to being alone againâŚÂ
Maybe it isnât so bad to let him back inside your heart.
âO-Of course, you donât have to answer right away,â he says, turning red in the face. Cute. âYou can tell me when I get back from New York. Howâs that sound?â
Youâre about to open your mouth to respond, but the moment is quickly shattered by the sound of Mingyuâs phone going off. He sighs, releasing you from the figurative cage of his arms as he leans against the sink right next to youâfishing his phone from his pocket before answering it in loudspeaker.
âKim Mingyu, where the hell are you?!â
âGood morning to you, too, Seungkwan-ah,â he chuckles. âWhy? Whatâs wrong? I told Jeonghan-hyung I wonât be coming back to the dorms until noon.â
âWell, Jeonghan-hyung mustâve forgotten to tell everyone else because the entire dorm panicked when we realized you didnât make it home!â the younger man squawks. âWe thought something bad happened! You werenât answering your phone last night either!âÂ
You and Mingyu exchanged knowing looks, and you have to stifle your laughter if you didnât want to be on the receiving end of Seungkwanâs rage, too.
âSorry about that, I was a littleâŚbusy,â Mingyu supplies.Â
âWell, whatever youâve been âbusyâ with, you better get your ass back here! Manager-hyung is looking for the car you borrowed, and if you donât bring it back soon, heâs going to give all of us an earful.â
âFine, fine. Iâll be back in thirty. Bye, Seungkwan.â
âHeyâ!âÂ
Mingyu ends the call with little remorse before letting out a long sigh. When his eyes dart back to yours, they flicker momentarily to your lips before he leans forward. You meet him halfway this time, pressing your mouths together in a firm kiss.
âIâll be back,â he murmurs. âI hope youâll still be willing to accommodate me when I do.â
Though it pains you, he peels himself away from your touch, leaning down to kiss Namjaâs head as he gathers his coat in his arms. It just occurred to you that heâs been eating breakfast with you donned with the outfit he wore last night while youâre dressed in nothing but a loose, oversized shirt. The knowledge makes you blush a little.
When you hear Mingyuâs car drive away, you sigh, running your hands through your messy hair. Namja pads over to you, tail wagging as he anticipates another round of petting. Of course you indulge him.
âKim Mingyu is such an idiot, isnât he?â you tell your goldie, and you like to think the small huff he lets out means heâs agreeing with you. âWhy wait until he comes back when I already have an answer for him?â
This time, Namja actually barks out loud, making you shake your head with a laugh.
You donât mind waiting for Mingyu, really. He obviously doesnât mind waiting for you. At this point, youâre at peace with the fact that you might still love him. Maybe, you never stopped loving him at all. Once he lands back in Korea and comes home to you, you promise yourself that youâll definitely show him.
Again and again.
this is part of the doting on you! series.
#svthub#seventeen smut#seventeen fanfic#svt smut#svt fanfic#kim mingyu#seventeen mingyu#mingyu x reader#seventeen x reader#fake dating#mingyu smut#lovelyhan#full length fic đ
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good morning i have slept a total of 2 hours hereâs my spoiler breakdown for terrible influence antwerp
they start by playing a text to speech voice who welcomes us and the straight boyfriends and the dads (theyâre a bit obsessed with the dads iâll be real) the voice tells us if we film sheâs gonna sue are asses. text to speech lady she is an icon
dnp come out and theyâre like yo this is cool itâs the first show, you guys are gonna see what weâve been up to and then theyâre like itâs the first show so we can use you guys to decide if we change anything
they theyâre like thereâs probably people in the audience who donât really know us so they do a 15 years of dan and phil lore breakdown with dolls of themselves in little set of iconic dnp locations (made by pj and sophie btw) they put these sets in a table in front of a camera and it shows on the big screen, (for 1 section of this the screen doesnât work for the first part lol) also phil makes the dolls kiss and they also make the dolls hump the breakfast bar cos of course they do
i canât remember what happens next or maybe it jumps right into the next thing i mention
they play a game show called role model or no-model which is a madlibs style game where you have to decide if the version of dan and phil the audience creates is a role model or not these are compared to real dnp. we had homophobic furry lawyer dan and linguistics dr phil wo has a thing for hamsters. just an fyi for this dan is really good at hearing what the audience is saying and phil is not at all and im pretty sure he made his up cos he couldnât understand what we wanted
okay so after this iirc they start talking about the youtube landscape and what theyâre gonna do after tour and how to keep people entertained and they go on a little adventure through different genres of youtube like minecraft lets plays, vtubers and then they pretend to be mr beast and pretend to give away a bunch of stuff that they donât have, they cure us of any mental health issues and they cure us from being gay <3
then they decide to have a boxing match cos obvs thatâs what youtubers do, they ask us to cheer for whoever they want to win and it has cool intro to it! iâll be honest this boxing match goes on for entirely too long like it spans the end of the first half and the start of the second but they have like choreographed fighting and OMFG itâs very gay and like suggestive and they do many times look like theyâre gonna have sex đ like one of phils moves is to hit dan with his ass while dan is holding him from behind so⌠yeah. anyway dan thought he won ours and then phil knocked him out with a tv, as he should!! also before they end the first half theyâre having an insult match where phils tells dan hes gonna burn his house down only for dan to say they live in the same house and i was dying it was so funny, phil also calls dan a dickhead and this is where he also calls him a cunt and thatâs how the first half ends. oh also phil has a fake 6 pack on and thatâs the $300 dollar silicone btw
okay second half after dan is dead they have a sincere moment and then theyâre like you guys keep telling us you want load of long unedited content and they ask us to tell them a topic to monologue about and someone shouts feet and they rant about feet lmao phil excitedly tells everyone he has a better wiki feet rating than dan
then dan goes on a rant about being discriminated against as a millennial (canât remember how we got there) and phil gets bored and starts watching subway surfers and iâll be real honest as a gen z i instantly got distracted by subway surfers and didnât listen to what dan was saying (that was the point tho) and phil keeps turning up the volume and dan gets mad and he storms off
we have a nice sincere moment with phil but idk what tf it was cos neither did phil đ
then suddenly a voice, oh here she comes, she asks if weâre ready to confess our sins and out comes sister daniel, everyone fucking loses it, if you heard me screaming so loud no you didnât.
anyway they read some confessions (phil is father philip) and they read out a few including one from @dnphobe !!! phil has a water gun that he didnât have when he was meant to and couldnât find and then found and he was spraying it at people to cleanse them of their sins which is what they meant by people being in the splash zone btw also phil sprayed it at dan it was kinda cute
okay so they say they need to go and get changed and they head off stage and thereâs a gag where they leave the microphone on and theyâre purposely making it sound sexual and itâs so funny and then dan comes out and phil doesnât cos heâs struggling with his leather fucking trousers that was a completely unscripted part for sure
then they talk about the hiatus a bit and how dan left us and they keep calling us their family and brb while i cry my eyes out
then they pull out a fucking banger of a song, like i canât even explain to you how good it is, it has a fully like kpop style dance to it that im gonna fucking learn lmao and dan was so good at it like im not even kidding that man was pulling moves!! phil was doing great too btw but he definitely wasnât as confident in it as dan was but damn itâs the best song yet imo!!
also i forgot to write the conspiracy bit because i forgot where in the show it is but on one of them they were trying so hard to make us say the opposite one but we were literally forcing tour bus on them and yes they confirmed they shared a bed on that tour bus!! and they played it off like its okay for friends to do that (cos it is) but they way they said it was that thing again where they blur the line a little so we know what they actually mean but still pretend they mean something else
okay some little things i remember that i didnât write above
- âi canât imagine my life without youâ
- âitâll be 15 years in decemberâ (if you know you know)
- the absolute silence after they confirmed the bed thing cos none of us were actually expecting it
- dan had to prompt phil a little to remind him what to say next but it was very cute
- they kept looking at each other in *that* way
- phil lied to us about when norman died cos he had norman merch coming out
- sleepless night with phil 3 is fake!!
- they showed *that* video of phil asleep on the tour bus
- there were multiple times where i thought theyâre gonna kiss right now???
-phil called dan kinda sexy
- ALL IS FORGIVEN, ANYTHING FROM THE LAST WE MIGHT HAVE DONE IS FORGIVEN THEY LOVE US WE ARE A FAMILY THEY ARE LITERALLY OUR DADS
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- summary : Mattheo canât help but wonder how he still didnât get expelled from participating in too many fights, until he comes back to his lover to apologise for his lash out.
- warnings : i think none
Ever since you and Mattheo had been together, he was the only thing that was on your mind especially at evening. Mostly when you were praying.
Since your boyfriend LOVED to stress you by fighting almost everyday and was on every girls fuck list, you just couldnât help but pray for him and for your relationship. Mattheo not once told you how a random girl confessed to him but he sent her away crying. Not once youâve overheard girls insulting you from pure jealousy and saying how they are going to either just make him cheat on you with them or even going that far as giving him a love potion to make him fall for them. Not once Mattheo had come to you with bloodied face, broken nose or all bruised hands. This just gave you no other option but to pray for him, you couldnât lost him to any other bitch or worse expelled by having too many fights.
Most of people thought since Mattheo was the son of Dark Lord, he had too many toxic traits. When someone would mention his name everyone would start to be judgy, saying he is too nonchalant, apathetic or arrogant. Truly, he was a loving boy, that was really caring about his loved one and would do anything for them.
Your boyfriend never knew about you praying for him. You thought he would find it ridiculous since he didnât believed neither in God or praying. He just didnât believed it worked. Even if he was sleeping over you still managed to loose your beloved.
Until one nightâŚ
In the day, Mattheo came back from yet again fight. Not admitting it loudly, you were a little tired of it. You could not count how many times in a month he came back to you, bloodied scaring and stressing the shit out of you. So you told him that while cleaning up his scars.
âMatty, you canât keep getting into this many fights. I know itâs hard because of people and their shit talking mouth, but violence is not the only answer and you know it because iâve told you this many times⌠i think itâs stressing me out more than you.â - You said while dabbing a cotton pad on a scare on the bridge of his nose. Mattheo rolled his eyes while looking on the floor, mumbling something under his nose.
You sighed backing up a long from him to look in his eyes that couldnât meet yours. âI know this talk is annoying but-â
âPlease Y/N, just⌠shut up for a second. Itâs so fucking tiring listening to the same lecture every time i come to you from a fight.â - He said standing up from the toilet seat to finally look at you. âI come to you for comfort not for listening to act like youâre my fucking mother.â Mattheo looked at you with annoyance and fury in his eyes.
You could not believe what you were hearing. Everything you did for him seemed to go ruin from the things he just said. Looking up at him with teary eyes, the only things you could say without breaking down was âGet out and think about what you just said.â
Mattheo just chuckled and stormed out of the room. When he was out you couldnât help but break down. You donât really know how many hours you have been crying and how many class have you missed but eventually you managed to get into bed and take a little nap.
When you woke up you felt.. so empty. The things that your boyfriend had said earlier still hunting your mind. You got up, to freshen up and just do a little self care evening just to lighten up your mood. Even tho Mattheo had hurt you too much today, you decided to not give up your prayer for him and your relationship and for everything to find it way out so you can make today up.
When you started praying, you didnât hear a soft nock on your dorm room since you were too focused on making sure Lord hears your prayers for your boyfriendâs protection. While the door opened you felt tears falling down your cheeks. Turning your head around to see who interrupted, you saw your boyfriend standing in the doorway. You quickly got up, sitting on a bed and wiping your tears away. You started to say something but he quickly cut you off.
âYou were praying?â - Mattheo said coming to sit next to you.
âUm⌠yeah.. Actually iâve been meaning to tell you for a while.â
âNo Y/N itâs okay, i came here just to-â You quickly cut him off.
âI had been praying for you. Every evening, even when you were sleeping over i always found time. Only for you. For our relationship. For your safety every time you fight but mostly for you to not get expelled from the amount of them. Thatâs why i always remind you to wind down with them. Because iâm scared iâm going to lose the only person i truly care about. I- i donât know what else to say.. i love you too much for us to either fight or to lose each other because of your stupidity. I donât pray for you for nothing, but i shouldâve told you sooner..â - You said not feeling the hot tears falling down your flushed cheeks.
âY/N⌠love.. thatâs.. the most beautiful.. way for you to show me any love. I really fucked up and disappointed you today. I should have never ever yelled at you today or even start any argument, later i realised you were so right about how i relief my anger. Today i couldnât stop myself, when i heard an asshole talking about you i just saw red. Iâm sorry love, i will try and calm myself just for your final peace. So you can never stress like you have been after every fight.â - Mattheo said stroking your face and wiping every tear that fell down your beautiful face.
When you started sobbing, the only thing Mattheo knew could calm you down was pull you into his amrs and whisper you sweet nothings.
After a while you fell asleep again while laying on your boyfriend that was rubbing your back all the time and kiss your head from time to time.
âIâm sorry sweetheart for todayâŚâ - Mattheo whispered knowing you canât hear him.
âNow i know how iâm still in this schoolâŚ. thank you babyâ
âYouâre welcomeâ - You said kissing his neck smiling.
In the end you both fell asleep holding each other knowing youâre each otherâs guardian angels<3.
Ëâ§ââシ:*+.\*シăďžď˝Ľ*:.・..・.:*
THATS ITTTT!!!! The ending is kinda shitty but itâs kinda late i had no other idea how to end it. My school started few days ago and the tests are already coming but ill try to stay consistent with writing somethingss!! PLSS SOMEONE SEND ME SOME REQUESTS CAUSE IK RUNNING OUT OF IDEASđđI hope yall liked it, if you have any tips for my writings please let me know and love yaaalll!!!
#harry potter imagine#harry potter#mattheo x y/n#mattheo riddle#mattheo riddle x reader#mattheo riddle smut#mattheo fluff#mattheo x you#mattheoxreader#mattheo imagine#angelcore
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i didn't realise i could just ask here than from messages im so sorry đ but im hungry so can you please write some more damian scenarios đ (angst/fluff PLEASE đ) im sorry if I'm bothering you but i can't get enough of your writing đ hope you're taking care of yourself tho!! :)))
Thisâll probably seem really short but itâs like almost 10pm and Iâm running on fumes and bad mental health days lately đ
âWhatâre you doing my treasure.â Damian said as he walked into his room, only to find you had let Ace and Titus on the bed and he had to blink twice to make sure his mind wasnât making up them wearing pyjamas on top of that.
âNothing.â You said nonchalantly as you brought Titus in your arms, cuddling him while he remained looking at his owner.
âI thought I said none of our pets should be on the bed?â Damian then said as he gestured to the two dogs that you had let on the bed without his permission as though the situation you both faced wasnât obvious.
âI was feeling lonely when you were out on patrol.â You replied, pouting. âThat and I was bored and out the dogs in pyjamas to feel included with me being in pyjamas.â You added as you smiled widely at him. Damian sighed, he shouldnât be surprised, this was bound to happen sooner or later since you still had a couple more weeks to heal your leg before being cleared for vigilante work again.
So naturally you are going to rope in Titus and Ace one way or another in your shenanigans much like you did with Jerry and Goliath when you had hurt your arm, Damian almost lost his mind trying to find you only to find you fast sleep stop of Goliath, with Jerry acting on guard in front of you both. It was certainly a humorous sight had he not been on high alert when he couldnât find you in bed upon his return from a mission with Bruce.
âYou couldâve waited until I came back my beloved, I donât want you hurting your self further just trying to entertain yourself.â Damian lightly scolded you as he walked over to your side of the bed, kissing you on the forehead before greeting -and thanking- ace and Titus with head pats and ear scratches, as an almost missable smile graced his face upon seeing the two dogs poetically melt into his scratches.
This was the sight he loved most when coming home and he always wanted to come home to this as many times as he could in the nearby distant future.
âIâll be fine Dami,â you said softly as you reached out to hold his cheek in your hand, âIâm not doing anything thatâll cause me any discomfort or more pain then Iâm already in and that Iâve been in really good company.â You gesture towards ace and Titus who would press themselves against either of your sides, acting as living crutches for you when you tried to move about the room and down the halls, theyâd even look up at you as though to silently ask if you were okay and if you needed to sit down soon.
You knew Damian was behind this and couldnât help but bring him into a tender to his forehead. âThank you.â You whispered.
âFor what my treasure?â He asks softly as he manages to settle himself on the edge of your shared bed.
âFor having ace and Titus look out of me when youâre gone, sometimes I forget how well you know me to know that Iâd get restless when healing.â You said as you patted both dogs on their sides in appreciation as they both decided that they had gotten comfortable enough to start falling asleep. Neither you nor Damian had the heart to tell them to get off, and silently decided that one night every so often could Ace and Titus could share the bed with you and Damian.
âLike you said I know you, better then most, and Iâd like it more if you didnât go and get yourself hurt from trying to do something beyond your current capability.â Damian admitted softly as he began to get into more comfortable sleepwear to join you, Titus and ace in bed by climbing into your side of the bed and holding you again his chest upon seeing as how Titus and ace took up his side of the bed.
âHow sweet of you my dear.â You said cheekily as you kissed his hand that rested on your side before yawning.
âSleep my love,â Damian said softly as he watched you rest your weary and heavy head upon his chest, âsleep sweetly.â He adds just as you succumb to long awaited sleep as he kissed your forehead, only to follow after you not long after being certain that youâd wouldnât be bothered anymore before joining you in the dream realm either Titus and Ace.
#dc imagine#dc x reader#dc x you#dc fanfic#dc fic#dc comics x reader#dc x y/n#dc fanfiction#damian wayne x y/n#damian wayne x you#damian wayne imagine#damian wayne x reader#damian wayne imagines#damian wayne fluff
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