#needs something still but idk what and i’m sick of looking at it so it’s done

[sgsketchbook]

not quite a wip not quite finished but. louis and armand in dubai or whatever

[luveline]

Idk if you've ever written it, but like, hotch having to save bau!r after she's been kidnapped and tourtered and shit and when hotch finds them, babes is BLEEDING and shit and like barely coherent but spewing the absolute most random bullshit to hotch bc their panicking and whatnot?

thank you for requesting 💌 fem, 1.2k

Hotch has felt sick for three days. 

He stands with his ear pressed to his shoulder, as though holding the ear piece further in will bring news of you quicker. His hands are up and ready, torch and firearm held aloft, wrists crossed. 

Morgan has to go in first. Morgan, because if you’re dead, Hotch will take actions that will disbar him from being Unit Chief. He can’t keep his head, not if you’re gone. His anger will swallow him whole, and he will do things that can’t be forgiven. 

His stomach churns, waiting, waiting, waiting. The sky is dark as pitch and the house they surround doesn’t stir for a time. 

Then, low and long, carrying heavy through the air like a sledgehammer to his chest, is the reed of your screaming. It’s a strangled sound, sobbing to begin with, begging as it ends. Hotch hears your, “No, no, please! Please! Please.” Your third please fractures into a writhing scream as the pain begins again. 

Hotch’s arms twitch, threatening to fall to his sides. You’re alive, but… 

“Okay, we’re going in,” Morgan says through the ear piece, clearly having heard the same agony as Hotch. “Right now. Team two with Hotch. Everyone ready?” 

You must have screamed so loudly for it to get through walls. That’s all Hotch can think as he follows behind the second team, the sounds of cracking wood and tight footsteps ahead.

He’s not in the room, but he’s down the hall, he can hear the fuss as he hurries forward. “Drop the weapon!” Morgan shouts, evidence of his own anger in the sheer booming volume of his voice. “Drop the weapon now! Drop it!” 

A sharper crack as a bullet hits something and a thud. Hotch forces himself into the room just in time to see a large, short-haired figure fall to the floor. 

You’re covered in red and purple and brown, blood in long lines and gushing from deep wounds, a mess of it. He doesn’t even know where to start, your gutted, exhausted sobbing like a knife in his stomach, your limp hands hanging either side of the strange chair you’ve been strapped to. “Morgan,” you say, audibly relieved and yet your pain obvious and electric as you gasp for air, “Morgan, you have to get me out.” 

“I’ve got you,” Hotch says, holstering his gun in one breath and by your side the next.

A SWAT agent begins to saw through your binds with a serrated knife. Hotch’s hands stutter on the metal ends of the chair, wanting to touch you but terrified he’ll put a hand in a wound he hasn’t noticed. 

“Hotch,” you say, and your relief is worse now. Like you aren’t covered in your own blood, like his being there has fixed everything. 

“Y/N,” he says back, holding your elbow carefully, “it’s okay, it’s all right.” 

“You have to get the straps off of me. I need to go home-”

“I know, that’s what we’re doing. We’ll get them off of you–”

“–I have to go home, Hotch. You have to take me home.” 

He knows that medical are close behind them, they’re coming in just as soon as the building has been cleared, and there’s more than enough agents to have it done in the next thirty seconds. He has to assess you in that time. He can take care of you. 

The SWAT agent cuts your last bindings and you immediately attempt to get up, gasping in pain when four hands push you down at the same time. “Sit down,” Hotch says, “Y/N, just stay there, just for a second.”

“No, no, let me down, I need to go home, I haven’t looked after anything and– and the laundry’s piled up, and–”

“Honey,” he says firmly, “I’m gonna take you home. I am.” He meets your eyes, panic and tears and concerning bloodshot clouding your vision. “I’m gonna take you home, but please stay still. Just until the EMS is here. Just so they can look at you.” 

“I want to go home now,” you say, nearly shrieking, grasping at his arm. It’s so loud in the room with so many people speaking that he’s almost glad for it. 

Your fingers slide down his sleeve and leave streaks of gore in their wake. Your hands are caked in your own blood. Done with his bargaining, you push up into his arms and get onto one of your feet, an incredible amount of force behind you as you get your way. Your knees buckle immediately —Hotch scoops you up and dumps you back in your chair, even as you cry and cry into his chest. 

“No, I need to go home, I have so much to do, I can’t stay here,” you whine, pain eating at your voice, your fingers weakening where they’re pressed to his stomach. 

“I promise I’m going to take you home,” he says, ducking to speak directly into your ear. “Do you trust me? I promise I’m going to take you back home. Please, please, sweetheart, trust me.” 

You hiccup, tears thick running down your cheeks, and orange where they collect at your chin, chest heaving as you border incoherency. “I do trust you. I– I trust you, I just–”

He takes a showful breath. “Deep breath. I’ll bring you home soon.” 

“All my plants are dead,” you mumble, blood smudging over your eyelids as you rub them harshly. 

Hotch holds your wrists. 

— <3 

He keeps his promise (though you don’t remember him making it, not beyond what Morgan recounts). Hotch takes you home when you’re well enough to be there, and he, done with pretences, stays for a while as you recover. 

“What are you doing?” you ask, more tired than you’ve ever been in your life, peering at him through sticky lashes where you lay in bed. 

He’s odd to see without shoes. “Nothing,” he says, misting the leaves of your window plant with a frown. “Just hoping I can bring this one back to life.” 

You’re not sure why he’s so worried about the plants. It can’t be judgement; he knows exactly why they died. 

Well. Whatever professionalism was between you is well and truly gone. You wonder what it is you said to him that made him finally snap, but it was nice to wake up with his hand in yours, and it’s nicer still to see him each morning. When you clear your throat and look at him longingly, you know without asking that he’s going to find his way back to your side, and kiss your cheek, hands smelling of fresh soil. He does it all with ease. 

“You brought me back to life,” you joke weakly. 

“I had much more help than the plants.” He’s been panicky around you sometimes since he found you again, but not scared. He tilts your face gently one way and then another. “You look pretty, but very tired. Why don’t you sleep some more, hm?” 

“Can I… I mean, do you think you could…” 

He takes your arm as he settles in to comfort beside you. His fingers begin to trace a gentle line down your arm, meandering around cuts and bruises. 

You close your eyes, hesitant of the darkness. “Are you sure I’m okay?” you ask quietly. 

“You’re home, honey. Safe and sound.” 

[wosoamazing]

Amada Part 3

Freyja Estrella Engen-León

Summary: You get sick

Warnings: Sickness, Vomiting, Mentions of Hospitals

Notes: I was going to post this tomorrow or later but seeming that I reached 1k followers this morning I thought it was only right to post something. Based off this request. (Also idk if this is very good but yeah) 1.4k words

You wake up in the middle of the night and your head feels funny, everything is muffled but not the nice muffled when you have your ear defenders on. It's a weird muffled and you don’t like it. You know you’re not meant to get out of bed at this time because the little clock on your side table is red however you don’t like this feeling and decide to venture out to your Mum’s room anyway.

-

You walk up to your Mumma’s side and tap her lightly, she wakes up instantly and is confused. She doesn’t normally wake up during the night, especially because Mapi is a deep sleeper and you’re very good at sleeping in your own bed, however she wonders if Mapi has woken up because of her leg, but the soft snore that immediately follows that though proves to her that Mapi is well and truly asleep. However when you shift next to the bed she notices you and it finally makes sense.

“Freyja, what’s wrong?” Ingrid asks you and you just shrug your shoulders, knowing she probably isn’t going to get an explanation out of you currently so she just decides to pick you up and place you in their bed, where you immediately snuggle into her chest. It’s something Ingrid is grateful for, they had been told by many people, that autistic children wouldn’t like touch, however it was something you often sought out, and not just for sensory reasons, more for comfort, your OT thinks that you have safe people, who you know and they know you, you trust that they won’t overstep your boundaries and so you enjoy their comfort, knowing you’re safe, your Mumma and Mami are very good examples of that but also Frido and Alexia.

When you wake up you feel even more funny, your very warm, and your head feels all stuffy, Ingrid notices and gives you some kids medicine before taking you to training, knowing that if you were actually sick she couldn’t leave you with Mapi, who still needed to use her crutches to get around.

“Is she okay?” Alexia asks as Ingrid walks onto the pitch having just set you up on the sidelines, with all your usual items plus the addition of some of those cardboard bowls the players get to take home when they get ouchies on their heads.

“We think she might be sick. I couldn’t leave her home with Mapi, she still needs to use her crutches. It would be unfair on both of them. Maps also panics too much. But we aren’t completely sure if she is sick,” Ingrid informs Alexia

“Are you okay? You-” “I’m fine, don’t worry. Where’s Aitana?” “She is sick,” 

Ingrid could tell that the gym was getting to much for you, but she was also worried about how pale your usually tan complexion was and how you had a slightly green tinge to you, she is pretty sure she saw your body roll slightly before your eyes went wide and you press a hand to your stomach.

“Ale, I’m just going to take Freyja to the bathroom, she doesn’t look the best,” Ingrid tells her captain who nods at her and gives her a sympathetic smile.

-

You sit down on the floor of one of the showers with your Mumma and she just talks to you, asking you questions about penguins, trying to calm you down and distract you from the weird feeling inside of you.

Your body rolls as you gag and you looked up at her eyes wide open with panic, “It’s okay Freyja, your body isn’t feeling well and it’s just trying to get rid of the ickiness, just let it happen, it might feel icky and be gross but it will make you feel better.”

You dry heave this time and just shake your head aggressively before tears start spilling from your eyes, “I know, it’s not nice, but you’re doing such a great job.”

You retch again and this time something comes up, Ingrid manages to place the bowl under your chin to catch everything. By the end of it your body is shaking and you’re silently sobbing, letting out a choked out cry every now and then. Ingrid doesn’t know what to do, you’ve never actually been sick before and she knows you are probably already overstimulated so touching you without your ‘permission’ wouldn’t be the best idea.

“Freyja, would you like a hug or do you not want touch,”

“Hug,” you weakly say and it’s all Ingrid needs to pull you in for a hug, which is when she suddenly realised how unwell she is feeling herself, however she needs to get you home, before she can let the sickness overtake her. Ingrid manages to get you changed out of your clothes and into a nappy before she has to sit down, feeling like she was going to pass out, she was ever thankful when both Alexia and Frido walked through the door, as much as she hated admitting she needed help she knew she did, and she knew you were good with both these people and in all honesty if she had to throw up in front of someone at least it would be one of her close friends.

“Can someone take her I-” your Mum had to stop and breathe deeply trying to fight off the nausea, and Alexia immediately scooped you out of her arms and Frido helped your Mum up before guiding her into the bathroom and then into one of the toilet stalls, locking the door behind them.

______

You were lying on Alexia’s chest miserably when Kiera and Lucy entered the locker room. The English women’s faces soften at the sight of you, you're just in a nappy and your skin looks clammy, and your ear defenders sit over your ears.

“We just came to check on you all, it’s been a while,” Kiera said softly.

“Oh, um, Ingrid is sick too, Frido is with her,”

“Do you need any help? We could pack your bags, go get the medics for you,” Lucy offers.

“Ehm, potser, els metges haurien de tenir medicaments per a nens, si només els poguessis aconseguir i tornar-los, seria genial, però només sabor de maduixa, (Um, maybe, the medics should have kids medicine, if you could just get it and bring it back that would be great, only strawberry flavour though)” Alexia told them and Kiera nodded before leaving the room and Lucy decided to help pack up your bag, Frido’s bag, Ingrid’s bag and even Alexia’s bag.

Kiera returns with the medicine bottle and some of it already in the syringe and Alexia quickly nods before taking the syringe off Kiera, she manages to get you to take it, mostly because you felt too bad to fight against the action. Your head felt funny along with your tummy and even with your ear defenders on everything was still weirdly muffled. Your skin felt yucky and you’re thankful you’re only in a nappy, the cool air feels nice against your burning skin and Alexia’s finger ran up and down your back soothing you softly.

It's been four hours since you arrived home, and almost 2 hours since Alexia and Frido took your Mumma to the hospital. You now laid on your Mami’s chest, fast asleep, like you had been for the past four hours. Mapi really wanted to go to the hospital with Ingrid, wanted to help her partner feel better, but you were important too and she needed to be there for you, and if your sickness was anything like Ingrids you weren’t well at all. Ingrid had collapsed in front of the toilet the second she walked through the door and she hadn’t been able to leave since, so Alexia and Frido decided they needed to take her to the hospital to get help and Mapi agreed, wanting nothing more than for you both to be okay.

Eventually after many hours Ingrid returned home, looking better, the medicine and fluids at the hospital had helped however she was now exhausted. She climbed into the bed, immediately curling into Mapi’s side, who still had you sleeping on her chest, before you all fell asleep, sleeping off whatever bug had invaded your family.

[atinylittlepain]

okay i was wondering if you could a joel x fem reader maybe even dbf joel where it’s loosely based on the song diet mountain dew by lana del rey? like the pining part of it and also the lyric “let’s take jesus of the dashboard” THATS SO HOT TO ME SO IDK

ive never requested anything before soo hope this is okay 🫣🫣

ahhhhhh, this one is a doozy

Ride It

pre-outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader

joel milller masterlist

She calls her dad's co-worker for a ride and gets a little more than she was expecting.

warnings | 18+ SMUT, age gap, DBF!joel, and not much else y'all

............................

“Hello?”

“Mr. Miller?” She can hear sheets rustling, his gruff sigh over the crackling receiver.

“It’s late, honey. What’s wrong?” Her heart stutters at the sweet name he calls her, the same name he’s called her since she first met him when her dad started working for Miller Construction four years ago.

“It’s my car. I think I have a flat tire and I can’t drive on it.” A long sigh filters through the phone.

“You should call your dad. He’s probably worried sick about you.”

“No! I can’t– he’s gonna be so pissed. Please, Mr. Miller. Would you– would you come get me? I know you’re good with cars and all. Please?” Another long sigh.

“Alright, honey. Will you tell me where you are?” She does, pulled over on the shoulder of the highway, a little ways out of the city but nowhere near home.

“Hang tight, I’m coming.”

“Thank you, Mr. Miller.”

“I’ve told you a thousand times– just Joel, honey.”

“Thank you, Joel.” 

“I’ll be there soon.” She clicks her cell phone shut with a sigh, slumping back in the driver’s seat of her car. Her stomach swirls in anticipation. Normally, she’d try to tamp down the crush she’s had on Joel for quite some time, but after a night out in the city with a few of her old high school friends, she’s just warmed up enough to let her mind race with thoughts of him. It’s silly, something that could never really happen, seeing as her dad has been best friends with Joel for years. But it wasn’t impossible, was it? After all, he’s younger than her dad, and only fifteen years older than her. Jesus christ, get a grip. She huffs, shaking her head to still her thoughts as she looks out at the pitch-black Texas night.

It isn’t long before headlights are brightening up the inside of her car and she turns in her seat to see Joel’s familiar pick up truck pulling up behind her. 

….

The rosary that hangs off her rear-view mirror is swaying harshly, the only sound beside their harsh panting and the sticky slap of skin is it clinking into the windshield over and over again. She’s not entirely sure how they got here, a mixture of late night talking and boundaries being flirted with until they both gave in to something they couldn’t have in the light of day.

“Shit, honey– fucking squeezing me– bit of a stretch for you, huh?” A high-pitched whine falls from her lips, her nails digging into the fabric of his unbuttoned flannel. Joel lets out a breathy laugh.

“That’s it, bounce on it for me, there you go– fuck– boys at school just not cutting it, are they? Need someone with a little more skill.” He punctuates his last word with a jolting thrust up that has the swollen tip of his cock grazing a spot so deep inside her it makes her crumple up against him, his rough fingers digging into her ass to support her as he starts a jagged rhythm of his own.

“C’mon, miss college. Use your words. Who’s making you feel so good?” She hadn’t been expecting it, a surprised yelp leaving her lips when he smacks the curve of her ass, hard, broad palm sure to leave a mark. There is nothing comfortable about the position they’re in, her straddling his lap, scrunched over him in the driver seat, one hand pressed up against the car door window while the other digs into his shoulders for stability. But all she can focus on is the sweet snap of pain and pleasure licking up her spine with each of his thrusts. 

“You, Joel– you feel so good– want more– please, please–” Her words die in her throat when he thrusts up particularly hard, pressing her hips down to meet him and holding her there in a deep grind. She lets out a choked sob of his name, cunt clenching hard around him and coaxing a low moan from the back of his throat. 

“Been wanting this for a while, haven’t you, honey?” His words are a smear against her bare chest where he had tugged down the front of her dress and bra, leaving harsh grazes of his teeth to the swell of her tits. He chuckles when the only response she gives him is a preening whine.

“Fucking knew it. You think I didn’t see how you were looking at me? Practically begging for it– shit– dirty little thing, aren’t you? What would your old man say, huh? Does he know his daughter’s just a little slut?” His voice is a southern slur stamped hotly into her skin, low and drawling and all melted together, pushing her even closer to the brink as her wetness starts to smear down hers and Joel’s thighs, the sound of skin slicking and sticking with each thrust becoming impossibly lewd. It’s almost too much when his one hand dips under her rucked up skirt, fingers harshly toying with her clit.

“Give it to me, honey. Make a fucking mess, c’mon.” The pleasure floods over in an instant, the only sound she can make is a breathy chant of his name as her hips seize up and she spasms around him. He’s not far behind as he thrusts into her a few more times before his hips stutter to a stop and she feels his warmth spreading inside her. She clings to him, both of them breathing hard and flushed with pleasure. 

“Jesus christ, I’m sorry– I should’ve–” “S’fine, I’m on the pill.” He throws his head back into the headrest at that, chest still heaving. But he doesn't stay still for long, jostling her in his hold as he suddenly leans forward and yanks the rosary still clinking into the windshield clean off the rearview mirror, tossing it haphazardly onto the passenger seat. She quirks an eyebrow at him as he settles back into the seat.

“Damn noise was driving me insane.”

[luffyvace]

The Luffy Package ☠️📦

(General & relationship headcanons as well as Luffy quotes (relationship implied) for his big day!!)

had to go all out for my fav 😊🤭

General Luffy headcanons:

Luffy has nails so short dirt can’t get under it 😭

not necessarily the booty diggers 🤭

but just really short, like almost booty digger ig—but not it

he has like 1% nail

its not intentional, they just never grow

i have a feeling someone taught luffy how to dance

idk who

it was likely makino, shanks or some else he cares deeply about

but he learned early on and has been a great dancer ever since!

maybe at parties since they happen a lot in one piece ⭐️

But just because someone taught him doesn’t mean he was awful at dancing at first

maybe he was a natural!

feel the rhythm typa thing 🎶 🕺

it’d be funny if he was

cuz imagine a guy that can dance but can’t sing

how you gon dance on beat to a out of tune song?? 😭

at least to uta anyway

ive always loved Luffy’s singing‼️

he never thinks about what the one piece is

but would be the most disappointed if it isn’t something cool

this dude is NOT interested in books so if the one piece really is just joyboy’s tale i don’t think he’ll be satisfied..😭 (I’m talking about the theory)

he definitely wouldn’t say it was all for nothin tho

he still has nakama, treasure and is the pirate king!! 👑

but…the one piece as books is just a mega L for him

Robin will enjoy ♡

you know that thing he does where he stretches his face real big? Like the time he was tryna cheer nami up when she was sick? And it scared vivi and zoro?

he scared himself when he first realized he could do that too

he was bored and started messing around with his devil fruit

at first he was outside and he stretched his mouth, and when realized he could see inside it, he was like ‘I wonder what this looks like’

so he went inside and did it into a mirror

he somehow managed to trash the whole bathroom running away from his reflection

he quickly got over it and realized it was kinda funny

he showed Ace and sabo who also found it terrifying

then preceded to scare people with it ever since

d end! :)

I feel like he’s thought about what the ‘D’ in his name stands for too

He came up with a bunch of outrageous names that likely aren’t it..

”Dingus?”

”Donkey?”

”Demarto?”

”Doorbell?”

”Dinosaur?”

yeah, dinosaur seems the most plausible 😊

Luffy Dinosaur Monkey!

‘HEY THAT SOUNDS COOL 🤩’

yup, that’s probably what it stands for 😁

sneaks into the usopp factory whenever he’s not in there

he ends up playing with his creations and destroys, it, other projects, and the factory altogether in the progress

he then runs out laughing

usopp later returns to the ruins only to find his months work of his greatest creation yet named “ultimate captain usopp three thousand smasher” has been reduced to fragments of metal nothing ☺️

listen idk if oda has confirmed Luffy’s favorite color but I would say it’s none

why? The same reason why you can’t ask a toddler their’s, it’s just gonna constantly change and you know it’s not the truth

arguably, if I had to pick an actual color based off canon, (IK it’s a shade but wtv) it’d be white

why? wym? Don’t you remember that one ep where luffy sang a song about how he loves snow cuz it’s so white?

(one of his lesser talked about songs 😭💗)

Relationship Luffy headcanons:

Luffy as a partner is really rambunctious and loving

But do note that loving doesn’t always mean romantic

for him it means loving you a lot but not being lovey dovey when showing it

you need protecting? He’s on the case!! He can’t and he has to beat someone up? One of your nakama’ll do it so stay with them!

your strong? Perfect! He’s gonna go fight this guy so you go beat up that one!

why am I mentioning that? Because it shows he has a great sense of trust and faith in you

Of course he does with all his friends but your reasoning is different

not only are you his nakama, your also his partner!! Which means he loves you in a intimate way!! Not just platonically

I say “just” because I swear sometimes Luffy’ll feel like a friend with you (best friends and lover typa thing 💞) he’s just as goofy and chaotic with you as he is Usopp and chopper

he feels extra lively when around you and always wants to play, whether you like this or not. Your personality depends a lot on how your relationship with him is but I won’t dabble into that today because it’s his birthday. 🎉 but honestly it doesn’t matter if you punch him like nami or laugh like brook-

he’s still gonna bug you! 💖 seriously you can’t get rid of this dude 🤨 Luffy will drag you on every single one of his adventures so I hope your either brave or fearless like him. The only time you two separate and he allows it is when he’s fighting the boss type thing LOL. Like Doflamingo or smth.

that said Luffy isn’t clingy he just likes being around you and seeing what your doing. Especially when you haven’t landed on an island yet and he’s bored. He’s always singing, playing with your face (ironic cuz he’s the stretchy one) or trying to get you to play some silly game he made up

that usually somehow manages to tick everyone off. 🤷‍♀️

will grab your hands randomly and make you dance to some song he made up about literally anything he sees or feels

he even made one about YOU once :3

”OOOOOHHH your my partner! Yes my partner! We’re having lots of fun! Going on adventures- YAHOO!! And dancing a ton! We’ll dance all arcross the grand line!! Take your hats off and let them fly!! YIPPIE!! We’re having a graaaaand TIIIIIIIME!” 😁🕺

Luffy quotes: (implied relationship between you two)

”HEY LOOK DO YOU SEE THAT ISLAND!! Cmoncmoncmoncmoncmoncmon!! HURRY UP I WANNA GO EXPLORING!!”

”can you sneak in the kitchen and steal some food from sanji? I’m really hungry and he won’t let me in anymore!!”

”LETS HAVE A PARTY!!!” — “we don’t need a reason! CMON!’ CHEERS!”

”lets tame that thing and make it our pet!!”

”what should we name em?” — “Junpi? SOUNDS GOOD TO ME!!” (You didn’t get a chance to respond 💕)

”HEY LOOK A RESTAURANT!! Grab on I’ll rocket us there!! HURRY UP IM HUNGRYYY!!”

”hey! Do you have any food on you?? I’m hungry!”

”Liar!! I can smell it!!”

”take a bath?! I don’t stink!!— EUGH!- okay yeah maybe….but I don’t wanna take a bath!! I’ll get all tired!”

”I’ll leave you with that guy! So go kick some butt! I’ll deal with that red forehead guy!!” (AN: There’s no actual red forehead guy that’s canon, I made it up 👍)

”⁉️ HEY WHAT HAPPENED?! Did that guy beat you up?! I’ll send him flying!! 💢”

”Shishishishi! Shh! Watch this! I’m gonna drop this on Usopp’s head! 🤭😂”

”Lets play a gaaaaame!! I’m so bored! 😞”

”can I have some of your food?” *Already stuffing a piece in his mouth* (the point is it’s not the whole thing ⁉️😱)

”HE LOOK MY BOUNTY WENT UP!! 🤩🤩‼️“

”Isn’t this fun?! 😆” (having a near death experience)

”don’t worry! My injuries don’t hurt at all! See? I’m dancing! I’m having fun!”

”oops. Sorry.”

”look!” (Two chop sticks stuffed up his nose and mouth)

”WOAHH A MAN KILLING BEAR!! LETS GO CHECK IT OUT! 🤩” (even if you wanted to say no your already being hoisted over there because you weren’t running fast enough for him)

”plan? Never mind that!! Let’s go! We’re gonna kick that butt head guys’ butt!!” (AN: another fictional villain I made up on a whim)

”HOLD ON TIGHT” (Gum Gum Rockets with hardly any warning)

”let’s play a game!! It’s called steal zoro’s swords without waking up zoro!! 😁”

”nyop!” (Puts you atop his shoulders 💓)

”nyop!” (Jumps on your back almost knocking you over 💝)

”look at my disguise! Nobody will suspect us! 😎👍”

”Cmere!” (Pulls you into his lap)

”HI! Is it almost time for dinner yet?” (Plops down in your lap)

Thanks for supporting me and my work—as well as my random disappearances too 💗🤗

Everyone! Say it!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LUFFY‼️‼️

[gloryy-vs]

i LOOOVE your acc so much, so when i saw that you’re taking nsfw requests, i just knew you’ll be doing the requests’ justice 😮‍💨 that neteyam with a breeding kink one was wheeeew.

could i request a reader who grew up with neteyam her entire life, the both of them used to telling each other everything. but neteyam doesn’t know how to tell her about his first wet dream being about her, and now he just feels awkward when she’s near bcause it’s all he can think about. reader picks up on him distancing himself and follows him out one night, not knowing he was trying to find a quiet place to masturbate. reader keeps on prying him since she’s been annoyed at the fact that he’s been avoiding her and now he’s telling her to leave, so neteyam ends up bursting and just telling her the truth. idk, like change up the entire thing if you want, i honestly just want more neteyam content but in your writing 🫶 thank you!

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u horny mfs.

yes. but what if we turned this into mutual masturbation

characters: 21 yr old neteyam x 20 year old na’vi!reader

rating: NSFW. masturbating, wet dreams, praising

a/n: just so we’re all on the same page. neteyam might be “ooc” because these are characters that aren’t showcased in a nsfw or horny way, so their kinks/sex life is up to interpretation. that’s why i have people send requests in. 🫶🏻

not proof read cus i’m lazy.

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It was painful being near you, knowing what went through his mind everytime he saw you walk by, bend over or emerge from the crystal waters. Seeing you soaked from head to toe was insufferable for Neteyam. You could tell something was bother him, especially by how he didn’t hang around you as often as you two used to when you were much younger. Every time you’d come by to join the group you could feel the awkwardness radiating from the 8 foot man, and he’d shuffle away after making up some kind of excuse.

You two were almost never alone, her make sure of it, immediately walking in the opposite direction and cursing himself silently if he saw you try and get near him. His confidence and slight ego broke down whenever he was around you. You were quite frankly sick of it. During the clans hunting time, you eyed the male Na’vi , seeing him abandon his siblings to a farther area on the shore. While he walked off you excused yourself from your newly made Metkayina friends, following after your old friend.

Neteyam found himself alone for a bit, the memory of the wet dream he had of you flashing through his head. He leaned himself against the rock, palming at his hard on and picturing you, bent over in front of him teasingly, begging for his warmth. His fantasy was cut short with the sound of your voice coming closer. “Nete? You hear..?” He heard you call out, immediately yanking his hand away from himself and crossing his legs over while standing.

“Y-yeah. Here. What is it? What’s up?” He said quickly, trying to dismiss your presence. You noticed he couldn’t even look you in the eye. his face contorted in thought.

“What’s up with you? You never hang around me anymore..” You trailed off while your hand found a spot on his toned and muscular arm. He drew a sharp breath, raising his head while looking down at you. “Just gotta get some space. New environment I guess.” Neteyam tried to convince you, but you still felt off. You squeezed his arm reassuringly , causing him to lick his lower lip anxiously while avoiding your eyes again. He squinted them shut and struggled to look at you again. It was eating him alive.

“Are you sure? I mean, we’ve always done like, everything together. I’m here if you need me, whatever you need me for I can do it.” You said, trying to look at him muscled body and soft lips without making it obvious. The way he presented himself as nonchalant and almost rough had you entranced. Neteyam rolled his eyes impatiently, gripping your shoulders tightly. He lowered his head to level yours, staring into your eyes.

“I need you. It’s fucking eating at me looking at you right now as if I don’t dream of your body every night.” He shook you lightly, searching for the right words. “Everything about you just fucking draws me in, thinking about you bent over, underneath me, on top of me. Everything.” He said.

He let go of you, rubbing his face in his hands, visibly tensed up from how hard he still was. Seeing your eyes widen at each sentence he said, it drove him crazy how you didn’t even seem opposed, with your mouth hanging open slightly. You stood there, watching him fight a battle within himself. You’d be lying to him and yourself if you didn’t think of similar scenarios, except not as often as the male did. You leaned against the rock behind you, fingers hesitantly playing with the knots in your loincloth. Neteyam stared at you, his hands dropping from his face. Your eyes dropped from his to his waist, his hard on clearly visible behind the thin fabric. It only entice your more.

“I told you I’d help you, didn’t I? Let me help you, Nete.” You said, holding your chin up while letting your cloth drop to the sand by your feet. He looked so relieved, thankful you didn’t think of him as a pervert. Neteyam removed his own cloth, surprising you with his girth and length. A perfect mix of both. You eyed the clear liquid pooling at his tip, biting your lip at the sight. Taking your index and middle finger, you brought them to your blue lips, sucking them and covering them in your saliva before taking it down south. Rubbing your clit in soft circles, you lifted up your right foot to press against the rock behind you, showcasing all of yourself to him. Neteyam looked desperate, already pumping his cock slowly, matching the pace at which your fingers were moving.

Seeing his reaction to your body grew your confidence and so you slipped a single finger inside of your gummy walls, leg twitching in response. You couldn’t resist, and added in another digit to press against your g-spot as you fingered yourself, watching Neteyams pace quicken as well.

“Fuck, you look so beautiful.” He said softly, but his eyes appeared lustful, staring at how your fingers intricately pumped in and out of you. Neteyam gripped his cock, his hand easily pumping him from the amount of pre cum collected from before. He angled his head, eyes darting from his cock to your soaked cunt. He imagined stretching you out, hearing you small whimpers and gasps as he easily slipped inside of you. The thought was too much, and his hips bucked aggressively. Your hand started moving faster, bringing your left hand over to run fast circles against your hard clit. Your body was growing overstimulated, a peaking feeling growing in your stomach at each thrust.

“I wanna feel you Nete, I wanna feel you deep in me.” You said, head thrown back as you fought your bodies demands to stop before you bursted. His breaths became more vocal, the sound of his hand stroking his thick cock grew louder as well. “Cum for me baby, please. Let me see what that pussy can do. I cant wait to feel you wrap around this cock like the slut you are.” He grew hungrier for you, eyes staring intensely at how fast your fingers were moving inside your already swollen hole.

That’s what sent you over the edge, your fingers burying deep inside of you as you orgasmed all over your hand. You whined, grinding your clit against your hand to come down from the sudden climax. Releasing a string of moans, you saw Neteyam suck in air between his teeth, pumping himself as fast as he could before his own cum spurted out, some landing on the sand while the rest dripped down his hand from the tip. His hips bucked into his hand, all while he tried to catch his breath. His golden eyes raked over your body, eyes meeting yours. You seemed hungry and impatient, and he knew just from that. This was far from over.

[lolaxbunnyy]

IDK IF YOU STILL DO MY HERO ACADEMIA AS IM NEW- but I love your writing so

What about poly Bakugo, Deku, Todoroki x Fem!reader who’s nine months pregnant, due any day now. She’s about to go into labor but they’re not home due to a mission

Idk if I explained this well 💀

also I hope this is good enough I haven’t been on here in a while 😬 . Also I gave the baby a name and a gender if you want something else then you can feel free to change it. Also if anybody has anything they would like me to write please ask!

warnings: fem black reader, mentions of pregnancy, mentions of birth, nothing bad though just enjoy.

SHOTO, IZUKU, AND KATSUKI. The top three most amazing and well known pro heros who were well loved by their fans had a little secret. They had a pretty little wife who was carrying one of their babies. Katsuki decided that he was going to be the one to get her pregnant first, the other two had no problem with that. After months of trying and no show she was finally pregnant and all four of them were so happy to finally have their first kid.

It’s been 9 months already and their precious baby girl has yet to leave her place within her mamas tummy.

Y/N rubbed her swollen belly as she did her rotations on her exercise ball. Katsuki’s mom was here helping her out with the little things that she needed. Mitsuki loved her from the moment Katsuki introduced them and now that she’s going to have a little grandchild she was even more happy with her future daughter in law.

"Y/N honey. The boys are calling again."Mitsuki said as she walked in from the kitchen to the living room rolling her eyes. “This is the fourth time they’ve called in the last hour.” Mitsuki chuckled.

"They're so worried that you're going to pop before they get back." Y/N grabbed the phone from, Mitsuki’s hand and put it up to her ear.

“Hello?” “Hey, baby. You doing okay?” Y/N rolled her eyes even though he couldn’t see her. “Yes I’ve been okay since the last time you called.” She heard him chuckle. “Okay. You’re a little worked up. What happened? Sick of us calling?” Y/N giggled. “Nope, never. I can’t even miss or worry about you guys because you’re too busy calling all the time instead of focusing on your task that you three were sent to do.” Before Izuku could respond she heard the faint voice of someone talking to him. “Oi? Is that Curls?” Katsuki of course.

Y/N heard what sounded like the phone being snatched away from Izuku. “Oi, Curls! If you ever hand up in my face again we’re gonna have some problems when I get back home, you hear me?” Y/N chuckled. “Yes sir.�� She heard the blonde kiss his teeth before handing the phone back to Izuku.

“Sorry, bout that. Anyways you’ve got some scolding to do to Katsuki anyways.” “Don’t you dare tell her about that!” She could tell Izuku rolled his eyes. “He was being careless today and almost lost his leg.” Katsuki grumbled. “ ‘Was not bein’ fuckin’ careless. ‘The hell was I s’posed to know he was gonna turn his leg in to a fuckin’ chain saw?!” Y/N pursed her lips. “Y’know if you two are done bickering we have matters to attend too.”

Shoto said out of nowhere. “That’s right. Well baby, look like we gotta go. We’ll see you next week, hopefully.” Katsuki butted in. “Yeah so tell the brat to avoid her eviction notices till then.” Y/N laughed. “I’m sure she heard you, Kat. I’ll see you boys next week. I love you.” “We love you more baby.” Then the phone clicked and the call was over.

Y/N sighed. She truly did miss them. Sure she enjoyed the company of her soon to be in laws, but she missed her boys. It was quiet and peaceful while they were away and she hated that. The bed was always cold and empty and she also hated that but it still smelled of them and she could at least appreciate that. So did the large shirt that she borrowed from Shoto’s side of the closet.

The boys had already been gone for two weeks and they’d be back home next week but it doesn’t feel like Blossom can wait any longer to be out in the world. Her eyes trailed over towards the belly cast that she had gotten done. The boys had decorated it all pretty and even drew a little family of four on it in Katsuki’s terrible excuse of a drawing. She’d never tell him that though because even if it was bad it’s still cute and still has meaning to it. She can still even feel their careful hands on her stomach.

Izuku’s hands are the most scarred and a little calloused but still firm and calming. Katsuki’s hands being the most calloused and somehow a bit sweaty from time to time. Sho’s hands were the softest but were always cold.

She missed the special treatment and massages they’d give her before they left. They were very caring and spoiling.

It’s been like this since they’ve found out that she was pregnant. They couldn’t be home for her, they had their moms take care of her. Then when they came home for the night, they’d be all over her because in their words, “you look so cute when you’re pregnant.”

She smiled softly at Mitsuki as she smelled the cooking of her favorite food. It’s getting later and later and there was a storm outside brewing. She didn’t want her poor boys caught outside in the rain.

"Y/N, Inko sent some more clothes for Blossom." Mitsuki smiled as she handed them to her. “Awe. We’re going to run out of space in her little closets.” Y/N held the shirt to her stomach. “Do you like it, B?” Y/N suddenly winced at a sharp pain in her stomach. “Okay, I’ll put it away.” But the pain kept coming. Mitsuki helped Y/N up carefully and at that very moment, her water broke.

Mitsuki immediately started to call phones. "Inko, Rei! It's happening! I need you here now! The babies coming!"

Mitsuki was rushing around the house to get the bags ready and extra clothes before helping her soon to be daughter in law towards the car.

Once they arrived after some time Mitsuki rushed in to get a nurse and she came back with a nurse who had a wheelchair ready and the both of them helped Y/N out of the car in to the chair and she was wheeled in and rushed towards the maternity floor. They put her in a room and went to go get things ready for her.

“Where the fuck are they going?!” Y/N whimpered out as one if her hands held her stomach while her other arm was draped across her face. Rei and Inko walked in. "They're going to get everything ready. More doctors and your epidural for your pain, Honey."Inko responded and Y/N hummed in pain.

“Did you call the boys?” Rei asked and Mitsuki nodded her head as she tried to get Y/N comfortable and situated. "Yes but they're not answering. I think they're too busy in what they're doing."

Rei let out a soft okay before looking at the clock on the wall. 12:03 AM it read. A nurse came back in and injected her with the medicine but it didn’t have time to do its job because right after the doctors came in and it was time for her baby girl to come out in to the world.

Everything went smoothly. (beside the three mothers having to stop Y/N from attacking the nurse. Twice. First time because if her giving her the epidural late and second because the bitch almost dropped her baby.) when Blossom was all cleaned up it was about. 2:19 when Y/N got to hold her baby and feed her.

She was so pretty. Her skin was a mix between Y/N and Katsuki and her hair was blonde and straight but Y/N was sure that her curls would come in soon. Last but not least her eyes her round and (e/c) just like her moms as she looked up at her through her blonde eyelashes. The three mothers huddled around Y/N to look at their granddaughter. "Awe. She's so pretty." Inko cooed softly. “I’ve got to get pictures.” Rei gushed and both her and Inko rushed to their purses to get their phone out while Mitsuki stayed by Y/N.

"Do you want me to get her so you can rest?" “Yes please, if you don’t mind.” Mitsuki took Blossom and soon after, Y/N was knocked out.

Izuku was the last person to get out of the bath for that morning. They’d been up since midnight going on a fake lead, practically wasting their time all night. Izuku grabbed what he thought was his phone but noticed that it was Katsuki’s. “Hey, Kachaan? You’ve got 10 missed calls from your mom.” Katsuki raised an eyebrow as he set down his freshly cooked spicy ramen.

He went to his call log and clicked on his mom’s name in face time. "Hello?" His mom’s face showed in the camera. “You called 10 times?” He said unamused. Thinking that it was just her being worried and paranoid again. "Well, I needed to tell you something." Katsuki hummed. “Kay?” The camera flipped around and Katsuki saw blonde hair then the phone fell to the floor as his mom let out an agitated ‘damn it’ before picking it up and a sleeping baby was shown.

“Is that?” "Yep." Inko cut off her son. “That’s Blossom guys!” The boys mouths dropped. Their daughter was so pretty just like her mommy. After that face time call that day the boys had to call off the mission to get home to their girls immediately.

Y/N was released from the hospital two days before they could come home so when they made it back they instantly without a second thought came straight home and they finally got to see their daughter. Blossoms little hair started to curl up a little so she most definitely started to look like Y/N.

Katsuki was the first to hold her and she was so small Katsuki feared that he might break her. Izuku and Shoto walked towards Katsuki, standing on either side of him as they looked down at their daughter. “She most definitely looks like a Blossom.” Shoto spoke softly as the little baby curiously looked at the three men.

Their moms smiled at them. "Congrats boys!" Mitsuki had tears in her eyes as little sniffles came out. "Oh my goodness. I'm finally a grandma! I'm never gonna get over this!" She cried into Inko’s shoulder and Inko patted her back comfortingly. “I wanna hold her next.” Izuku held his arms out and Katsuki carefully handed Blossom to him. Once he was secure in his arms, Katsuki turned towards Y/N.

He smiled softly and he walked over towards her giving her a kiss on her cheek. He watched the others coo over the little blonde haired baby.

“Thank you so much, baby.” Three months later, the world knew about their two girls after Izuku had posted a video of Blossom giggling away at Katsuki and Shoto making silly faces at her while Y/N just watched in the background with a big smile on her face. That video was the most brought up topic in their latest interviews and they didn’t mind at all telling the world about their girls.

this story belongs to @lolaxbunnyy !!

[concretecultist]

Sunshine (muscle memory pt. 2)

summary: "true love never leaves, sometimes it just gets lost temporarily. lost in pride and ego, lost in confusion and misunderstanding. but love being lost is never the end; sometimes love needs to breathe before it finds home again."

word count: 17.6k

pairing: reader x noah sebastian

warnings: angst, talks of mental health, feelings of guilt, mentions of marijuana usage, crying, dad!noah, FLUFF

THIS IS PURE FICTION AND IS FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY!!!

A/N: yeah so idk how to write short stories really 😭 so this is a long one!! Please make sure to comment and reblog as it helps us writers out immensely!! Much love!

~Berry🫐

“You’re so full of shit!,”

Matt had come back into town, rushing to tell Noah and the guys what had happened while he was out. Noah, Nicholas and Jolly were playing a video game on the big screen when Matt rushed in, Folio nodding in and out of sleep with a bag of chips in his hands after facing a whole blunt by himself.

“Bro, I know what I fucking saw,” Matt was seething, does Noah really think he would lie about something like this? “This wasn’t some Y/N doppelgänger, it was Y/N and she had a baby, a little girl.. who looks just like you might I add. It’s weird!,”

Noah felt like his stomach fell out of his ass. Matt has to be bullshitting. Maybe you were babysitting? There’s no way you had a baby. There’s no way he had a baby.

“It’s hard to tell who babies look like when they’re still that young. Maybe the guy who told you to go away was her new boyfriend,” Jolly tried to justify.

Matt frowned at Jolly’s disposition. Everyone in this room knew you like the palm of their hands. It took you a while to open up to Noah and become his girlfriend and even longer to open up to them to consider them playfully-annoying brothers.

“She’s not like that,” Nicholas clicked away at his controller, brows furrowing as he soaks in the conversation.

Matt clapped his hands and pointed to Nicholas as if to say that the point he made was based, and it was.

Nicholas continued speaking while keeping his eyes trained on the screen, absolutely obliterating the characters within the game, “I mean think about it. If what Matt is saying is true-,”

“And it is!,” Matt interjected but all Nicholas did was roll his eyes and continue speaking,

“-Then the time between Noah and Y/N breaking up versus now, would not be enough time for her to get pregnant by someone else,”

“One night stand after they broke up?,” Folio answered absentmindedly.

“You know damn well that’s not how Y/N is,” Matt just wanted to pull his hair out, “If you saw that baby then you guys would see I’m not lying,”

Noah felt like he might be sick. Even if you two broke up, you would tell him that you were pregnant… right?

But then again, the last few months of your relationship, he wasn’t there, emotionally nor physically so he can’t blame you if you didn’t. It doesn’t hurt any less though and he doesn’t know what to believe.

“Where the hell did you even see her? I figured she jumped ship,” Noah shrugged, “And even if this is the case, Matt. She blocked all of us on… o-on everything so how do you expect me to go about this?,”

The silence from the blond was enough of an answer for Noah but Matt’s silence didn’t mean he didn’t have one.

“Why are you so adamant on denying this?,”

“I’m not!,” Noah let his character go idle long enough for Nicholas to say fuck it and actually pause the entire game, “I just don’t know what to do! I mean, if she acted like she didn’t want to see you then what makes you think she’ll want to see me?,”

The guys knew Noah had a point, but he should still try.

“It’s Sunday. Every other Sunday she goes to the markets and you should know that because you would always be at the studio with Jolly so she would take me with her,” Matt stood there with his arms crossed, he watched the gears turn in Noah’s head but he knew the brunet still wasn’t getting it.

“Okay?,” Noah was stumped.

“Which means she still has her routines, dork!,” he tapped his fingers to his temple as if to tell Noah to ‘fucking think’

“Meaning on Wednesday, she’ll be at the actual grocery store getting what she couldn’t at the market,” Nicholas answered for Matt.

“Are we sure any of this is a good idea?,” Jolly probed, “If you guys ended mutually then one, why would she not tell you, two, why would she block all of us, and three, why would she act like that when seeing Matt?,”

Jolly, Matt and Nicholas had their suspicions about the breakup. Noah had told them it was pretty cut and dry but they could never get your side as you pretty much went off the grid.

“I don’t know!,” Noah held his hands up in frustration, “I don’t know why you guys are acting like I’m not blindsided here,”

“There’s only one grocery store within the town I saw her near. Don’t be on any stalker shit but I’ll bet you my fucking mixing equipment she’ll be there on a Wednesday at 4:45 before the after work rush comes,” Matt refuted.

It felt strange to Noah that all of his friends seemed to read you like a book, but when he thinks about you, you seem like a mystery. Maybe it’s because you had no choice but to become one after a while. It’s his fault you closed yourself off. You tried until you couldn’t yet Noah made your efforts seem pointless. Noah had neglected you, he became a stranger who wasn’t involved in your routines anymore and he’s had more than enough time to realize that after you left.

When you left it felt like his world had stopped. How did he fuck up so bad? Letting the voices in his head get to him, pushing you away with the idea that you’ll someday be with someone who deserves you. The demons in his head convinced him that he wasn’t that someone.

He let the weight of the world crush him. He let the brain fog cloud his vision, his judgment and now here he is, doing his best to get better. Now has the news that he may or may not be a father. He’s spooked by the idea. If he couldn’t be a good partner how does he expect you to let him in for a chance to be a good father… if he can find you that is? He’s petrified.

Except he knows damn well it doesn’t outweigh the panic you felt when he pushed you away, forcing you to go through it all alone.

It had been about two and a half weeks or so since your run in with Matt and it has done nothing but prompted you to stay inside more than you already have been. Reid agreed to drop off your needed items and even stuck around to help around the house. He’s even brought Ms. Ernie by as she’s missed you.

You wanted to get out though. You missed going on walks around the woods, missed stepping foot on the outskirts of the city. You couldn’t hide away forever and you really couldn’t do that to Noelle, she needed to see the outside world.

That’s how you found yourself in the supermarket in town with Ms. Ernie as she asked you what you wanted for dinner.

“I think some mashed potatoes and steamed broccoli will be good sides,” you suggested.

“Want gravy?,”

“No, I’m more of a butter and pepper kinda gal,” you lightly nudged her, patting Noelle’s bottom as she laid quietly in her baby wrap against your chest.

“You kids don’t appreciate good gravy anymore,” she playfully rolled her eyes.

This is something you really needed. Was this a friendship you expected to have? Absolutely not, still it helps you feel normal. You share your eggs from your chickens and she makes you milk and yogurt, she always invites you over for Wednesday dinner, you invite her over for a nice cool lunch while she’s on break from the truck.

“What do we want for dessert?,” you ask, looking at the array of fresh baked goods.

“Pick whatever you want, sweetie. I’ll be right back, I’m gonna go look at the teas, I’m running low and I think they’re on sale!” she waved, taking the cart to go get her favorite brand of iced tea.

“What are we feeling, Sunshine?,” you lightly bounce, her hand reaching up to feel your cheek, “Do we want carrot cake, red velvet? Ouuu that caramel crumble apple pie sounds gooooood,”

You look at her, heart swelling while she just squeals and smiles at you. You never expected yourself to be a parent, a single parent at that- but smiling down at this face, with the cutest, chubbiest cheeks and big, animated eyes, you wouldn’t trade this for anything.

“I know, I think we should get all of them too,” you rub your nose against hers just to hear her babble again. You would never get tired of that sound, it became your favorite song.

“But!-” you open the cooler door and begin reaching, “-Mama is really craving the red velvet,”

Unfortunately for you though, it was on the top shelf and you just weren’t tall enough. You hear yourself grunt as you reach and honestly it’s rather embarrassing. You try again and see no one nearby to ask for help and you feel defeated. All you wanted was a nice piece of cake. Deciding to give up, you slap your hand down against your thigh and look to Noelle to pout at her, “I guess it wasn’t meant to be”

While you were looking at her, you were in your own world. Everything just seemed to stop when you peered into those eyes. Noelle nuzzled her cheek against the back of your finger as you caressed it. All you wanted was a nice dinner followed by eating cake while she slept on your chest, a nice night with you and Ms. Ernie competing against each other while watching a game show.

You were so caught up in adoring your daughter that you didn’t see the large hand that reached over your head to grab the cake you desired.

“Here you go,” a hopeful drone made its way into your ears.

You were so set on having a good night except when you looked up, your smile immediately fell and you were frozen. Your eyes seemed to deceive you because there was no way this was real. You had to be dreaming. There’s no way he’s standing in front of you.

Your body betrayed you. Everyone speaks of fight or flight and a part of you always believed that if you were in a situation where you had to choose, that you’d choose flight, not being the fighting type and opting to always run and hide. But… Now that you’re in a situation like this, there’s a third option many don’t acknowledge.

Freeze.

There’s fight.

There’s flight..

and then there’s freeze…

And you froze.

Your mind and body let you down. Your feet should be carrying your body as far away from his as possible but you just can’t move. You’re trying but they won’t budge.

That smile he shines isn’t helping either. It's an expression you want to wipe off his face but for some reason you can’t help but continue to stare because it’s a smile that you never expected to see again. It clicks that your mind is betraying you again because why are you finding comfort in it?

His eyes were tired but still so beautiful. You notice they hold hope as well as hesitation.

“You always did like red velvet,” he snickered but you didn’t find anything funny. What kind of sick joke is this?

“Get away from me,” you whisper. It sounded more confident in your head, you didn’t want to sound weak. Another bodily betrayal.

“I’m not here to scare you or hurt you. I just want to talk,” he caught a glimpse of the gorgeous baby in your wrap and his breath was taken away.

Matt was right and not just about the baby. But your routines. You never strayed far from your habits, so to see you walking in the store with your baby to your chest made this much more real than Noah could process at once. The poor guy doesn’t know if he’s relieved or scared shitless.

“There’s nothing to talk about. She’s not even yours,” your eyes flit as the tears fall down your cheeks. It felt like you were suffocating now. You know Matt spilled and really, you couldn’t blame him because if you were in Noah’s position, you’d want to be told as well. But then again.. you wouldn’t be in this position if you were him because you would’ve tried to save your relationship.

Being found so easily wasn’t something you planned and now you’re battling the feelings of wanting to slap him or run in his arms because while he hurt you- Noah was it for you. He was endgame. Seeing him stirred all these feelings inside that were now giving you vertigo, causing your stomach to swirl and a lump to form in your throat.

“Y/N, she looks just like me. There’s a lot to talk about,”

He tried to get another glimpse but you shielded her in the wrap. No, no way in hell. Taking a giant step back, you hold her closer, “I won’t let you take her away from me. She’s all I have, Noah. I won’t let you,”

Noah took a step forward and could only brandish defeat when you took yet another step back.

“I’m not trying to take her from you,” Noah knows he has no right to be offended. Like, let’s think- you two broke up and his best friend bumped into you, now Noah knows about his child and he found you in a random supermarket after you fought tooth and nail to stay away from him. It would make sense why you think he’d take her from you, but that’s far from what Noah wants. It’s a long shot but he wants to make this right.

Noah understands that he fucked up in the past but he wouldn’t do that to you, “That’s why I want to talk. I want a chance to be there,”

A scoff from you echoes in the empty aisle. How rich.

“You weren’t even there for me and you expect me to believe you’ll be there for her?,” You grit through your teeth, “She is too precious to be let down by you, Noah. Do it to me all you want but not when it comes to my daughter,”

A frown etched its way onto Noah’s face, waving his hands as if to say ‘wait, hold up’. He knows he hasn’t been there but he’s not about to be some deadbeat.

“Our… daughter,” he corrected, “You didn’t even give me a chance to know so I could be there,”

“You’ve got some fucking nerve!,” your voice had gone shrill and you were thankful that there was little to no people in the store. You wished he would have approached you outside, then you really wouldn’t have to worry about keeping your voice down.

“ ‘Our’ daughter, Noah? Really?! If you weren’t there before I was pregnant-,”

“I told you I just needed time,” he interjected, still holding onto that sentiment.

“I gave you four years!,” you spat, “Four years of me, Noah. I gave you four years to learn how to love me. To learn how to communicate even up until the end,”

Who knows how much time he would have needed. Who knows if he’d have even gotten his shit together by the time you found out you were with child and gave birth. Having Noelle now, you know for certain you couldn’t have just sat with idle hands.

“Y/N please,” he begged, still holding the cake in his hands, “I love you and I fucked up. It’s been killing me since the day you left and how I never had to chance to make it right, then Matt told me-”

“Matt is wrong. Matt doesn’t know what he’s talking about!,” you really weren’t trying to make a scene here and you were still trying to convince Noah that Noelle wasn’t his.

“She has my eyes, Y/N. She’s a perfect mix of you and me. Please, just, can we talk about this over coffee. I know you don’t owe me anything but can we meet for lunch or something?,”

Before you could answer with a fat ass denial, Ms. Ernie is coming up with her noisy cart, scooting along with a small frown on her face.

“They done moved my tea, I had to ask for help,” she frowned. She was never the type to like asking for help in stores, she liked it when things were easy to find.

She moves to stand beside you, waiting for your response but then she notices the look of shock you’re wearing and meets Noah’s eyes. It took her a second before she gawked, looking to Noelle and back to Noah.

“That’s that baby’s daddy!,” she looks over her glasses and you loudly sigh at her statement. She didn’t always read the room well.

“Ms. Ernie!,”

“Sorry, honey but it’s undeniable,” she shrugs, looking back to Noah, “You gonna put that cake in my cart or just stand there looking pretty,”

Noah stammered before rushing to set the cake down in the cart and turning to you. Words seem to catch in his throat, not exactly sure what to say.

“I know you blocked us all on everything so just… reach out when you’re ready. I really would like to talk about all of this,”

“I gotta go” Looking to Ms. Ernie so that she would get the hint to start walking. You knew you were in for a long night of her lectures, no matter how insightful they always were, you weren’t ready.

You had a feeling for how the night would go now. This feeling had your stomach queasy as if you’re on a boat, feeling the waves rock you to and fro. It was hard to face the music but she was going to make you. That’s just how Ms. Ernie was, you just weren’t ready for her to be right about it all.

“Give him a chance, sweetie,”

Noelle was fast asleep while you leaned on Ms. Ernie’s shoulder, eating your cake and watching Wheel of Fortune. You wanted your night to go just like this but it wasn’t enjoyable, not with all that was plaguing your mind.

“I can’t let him back in,” you think about it, recalling how bad it hurt you the first time around, “Now that Noey is involved, I can’t let my guard down. I’m a mom now, I have to protect her,”

“I’m not saying throw your whole hand in,” she sipped her tea, “Have a drink with him. I can call Reid to help me with our cute lil plum,”

It wasn’t a secret to how badly you were emotionally wounded when you and Noah parted ways, but it also wasn’t a secret to Ms. Ernie just how bad you love him. From the day you met her, she claimed you and Noah would find your way back to each other. You always told her it was a fat chance. Even now, your heart was playing tug of war.

Do you stay away? Leaving him to wallow in his bad decisions? or do you lean into the possibility of mending things?

“I never stopped loving him, that’s why I’m scared,” you sit up to look at her, she looked so noble when looking at you over her glasses like that, “I watched him love me less and less until our love just became an empty shell. I watched him pick his job over me and I can’t put her through that,”

Ms. Ernie reached over to wipe your tears when she caught sight of your trembling chin. It was comforting, like a grandma tending to her grandchild while they experienced a melancholic mood.

“Take it slow. Take time to get to know the new him and he can take the time to get to know the new you,”

“Does he deserve that though?,”

“Mmm,” she shrugged, “Sometimes a lot of good can come out of a second chance. What if you and him were meant to part ways, only so you two could find each other again?”

“Love shouldn’t come to that, no?,” a twinge of confusion worming its way into your tone

“Oh honey. You’ve got a lot to learn about love,” she lightly swatted your leg, “No amount of time and space can separate you from those that are meant to be in your life. This is a second chance to create a new story,”

You called it. You knew she was gonna get all philosophical on you and be right about all of this.

“Don’t rush into it but…” she sighed, “Give it a shot,”

You don’t even know if you were strong enough to lift the metaphorical gun to give it a shot. Pondering her words each bite at a time while you finish your treat, how do you go about this without immediately falling in love with him again? He was so easy to love even when you didn’t want to, even in his faults. One look at him and it felt like the first day you met him.

You were standing at the bus stop one day, sighing at having to take public transportation as your anxiety has been in overdrive since your car was in the shop. Public transportation meant a lot of people in close quarters and you just couldn’t handle that right now.

In the midst of your mind being in a flurry, a group of rowdy men are approaching. You’re too caught up in trying to reduce your apprehension to notice them getting closer until a nameless man bumps into you, knocking your token out of your hand.

Watching it fly from your hand, floating in mid air, all you can do is try to catch it but it just wasn’t your day. Your token falls down the street drain and your gasp causes the rowdy group to stop.

“No! No, no, no, no noooo!,” you fall to your knees and look down the drain to see the token shining up from the bottom. It was mocking you.

“Dang it!,” your head falls in your hands, wallowing in embarrassment. The token station was 9 blocks away, there was no way you’d make it there and back in time. Of course the transit app wasn’t working on your phone either, you’d been telling yourself to get a new phone carrier for months now, now look at you.

“I’m… so sorry!,”

Removing your head from your hands, your eyes move in the direction in which the voice came. Your breath is instantly taken away once again but for a whole other reason.

“I can pay for another token,” he offers, helping you up, his large hands grasping your biceps to get you up right.

“No it’s okay I can-,”

“Please. It’s the least I can do,” the tall brunet insisted. Your words are caught in your throat, eyes trying to drink in his beauty before he becomes only a memory.

“Nice going, Noah!,” a tall blond wearing a hat pushes him.

“Watch where you’re going, asshole,” another chuckled, he was also decked out in tattoos, gorgeous black hair and glittering eyes.

But your eyes were on the inked man in front of you, the one who made your day even more of a rollercoaster than it already has been. While his friends make fun of him, your eyes are tracing over his tattoos, you’d never seen so many on one body in person before.

“Is… is that a Garden of Eden reference?,” you point to his neck.

He touches his throat and chuckles, a noise that you weren’t aware would change your life.

“Yeah, yeah it is,”

“It’s nice,” you mutter, afraid to speak above a certain octave. You don’t talk to people much, you were only a lonely librarian who went to work, staying in the basement all day to organize books and then go home.

“Thanks…?” he trails off but points to you ask if to ask you a question

“Y/N,” you spill out, “M-my name is Y/N,” you anxiously stick out your hand for him to take and shake, “I think he just called you Noah?,”

“Yeah that’s me,” his smile… my God his smile was hypnotizing. His smile could cure all sadness

“You owe me a bus pass,” you point out, “A-and… and I can pay you back over a cup of tea and some fresh scones at my favorite bakery downtown,”

Your confidence not only caught him off guard, but you as well. You’d never suggest something like that to someone and now you’re overthinking the fact that you’ve made such a fool of yourself.

“Sorry that was… that was abrasive and demanding. That was so rude. Y-you were just being nice and I just… you’re just so pretty and oh my God… Y/N shut up-,”

“Hey,” he softly talked over you, wanting to calm you down without scaring you.

“We’ll stick around until the bus comes so I can pay for your pass and we can trade numbers to set up a date for those scones,”

A date… a DATE?! You’ve only ever been on a handful of dates before and they all went terribly. Surely he didn’t mean like… a date-date, right? Like, you’re sure he just meant a little meetup so you could actually pay him back.

“O-okay!,” wide eyed, you nod your head and look around to his friends that are smiling and laughing and you don’t know if they’re laughing at you. It’s okay if they are, you’re used to it.

“Don’t mind them. They’re assholes,”

“We are not!,” a shorter man punches his arm, “I’m Nick by the way, but you can call me Folio. That’s Jolly, Nicholas, Matt, Davis and Bryan!,”

You nod to them all, making a note of their names.

“Y/N,” you sputter, “I’m Y/N,”

“We heard,” Jolly smiled.

“Right,” you give a bashful smile and turn from them to sit on the bench, “The buses are running 20 minutes late today so you really don’t have to wait,” you set your book in your lap.

“I insist. If these jerks are in a rush, they can go without me,” Noah throws a hand back at them. He’s not surprised that that’s exactly what they did.

They left Noah there, giving you two the chance to talk about the most random things, like your favorite book genres to read, things on your bucket list, aliens, paranormal shit. Just fun things. This is the most you’ve talked to any stranger you’ve ever met, you don’t even talk to your co workers like this.

Noah let you yap about your interests, he admired the way you animated your speech with your hands. He was absolutely enamored with the way you bounced in your seat when he brought up a topic that excited you and he made a mental bookmark so he could memorize the way your eyes close when you laugh.

Noah didn’t believe in love at first sight but this felt like it.

While discussing your favorite twilight characters, the noise of the approaching bus pulled you from your conversation, Noah can see how your face dropped. Your conversation went by too quickly.

“We can have more conversations like this,” Noah shows you his screen, displaying his number and you curse to yourself, knowing he can see you shaking while you hurry to type it into your phone. Your heart was beating out of your chest, he is so sweet and so fricken cute and his tattoos are so cool and he just sat here to talk to YOU?! No one ever just talks to you.

He’s even nice enough to help you onto the bus and get you seated before saying his saddened farewells to leave you. His demeanor gave off reluctance and you felt like you were in a rom-com when he stood outside the bus, waving as it began rolling away.

Your face was hotter than hell, there’s no way any of that just happened. Your phone felt heavy in your hands, demanding to be opened. Gnawing at your lip, your fingers dance on your screen, trying to figure out what to say.

You went with a simple text, something quirky. Something that you hope he’ll answer to and not ghost you after the way you opened up to him so easily.

“So… about those scones?”

All those memories flood back and you can feel the dampness of your face. Where did that Noah go?

How did your once grey world that become so colorful so quickly with his presence, fade into grey once more with his absence in the blink of an eye?

What happened to him that he became so detached? What was lying beneath the surface that he let fester until he let it impact your relationship?

You feel Ms. Ernie takes the plate away from you and rests her hand on your cheek, pulling you out of the pit you were digging with your overactive questioning.

“I got the spare bedroom ready for ya, go get some rest,”

Taking her advice, Noelle snuggled into you as you carried her to the spare room where Ms. Ernie had set up a spare bassinet. You had tucked her in, making sure she was safe and secure before plopping down on the bed with a large sigh, heels of your palms pressing into your eyes to subdue your flowing tears. Now that you were alone, the weight of everything came down.

Tired of feeling so scatterbrained, you grabbed your phone, tapping away at the screen to have your thumb hovering over his name. Was this a good idea? Do you give in this easily? Would this be healthy for your mental state right now? Maybe Matt was right, this wasn’t about you, this was about Noelle, she deserved her dad, right?

But what about protecting her? You didn’t want to introduce him into her life just for him to turn around and jump ship when things got too hard.

Here goes the vicious cycle of overthinking and all the possibilities that made themselves known with the heaviness, giving you no other choice but to feel it filling up your chest. How soon did you want to do this? Did you even want to do this at all?

You’ve been blaming yourself since that day at the market. Had you gone earlier like you always do, you wouldn’t have bumped into Matt, or if you had paid attention, you could have avoided him. There were so many outcomes the universe shuffled in its hand and yet the card you were dealt was the situation you were facing right now.

Finally having enough of your own inner dialogue, a deep breath escapes you when clicking on his contact, closing your eyes when hitting Unblock Caller

Just like the day you met him, you’re faced with the challenge of what to say, except this time there was nothing cute or quirky to say. It was simple and serious.

Tomorrow 12pm at the bakery downtown.

That’s all you could come up with before pressing send. It’s almost like he was waiting by his phone, waiting for you to reach out and it makes you kick yourself. What if this is a set up and you’re falling into his plan.

Wait, no.

Noah has messed up but, He wouldn’t do that… would he? He wouldn’t hurt you any further. You hope you’re right because now this is happening.

I’ll be there.

Sleep fought you all night. In and out of sleep to either tend to Noelle or simply because your mind wouldn’t power down for the night. When you were finally able to get some shut-eye, it was like it was already time for the sun to rise.

Ms. Ernie had breakfast ready for you after you fed Noelle, scooting around her quaint kitchen humming the tune of a classic she grew up listening to. Your nerves were bad as you thought of the day ahead.

“So, what are your plans today?,” she questions.

Slowly chewing your food, your eyes avert down to the table. Why do you feel so embarrassed to admit that you’re meeting him today despite her calling it?

“I uhm, I was going to ask if-,”

“Yes. Reid is already on his way,” the elderly woman delivered a smug expression, she’s been on Earth long enough to know how young love works.

You chuckle at her and shake your head, “You don’t even know what I was going to ask,”

“Baby, I can read you like a book. You’re gonna go see him. I could tell before you went to bed last night. We’ve spent enough time together for me to know you’re not over him,”

Knowing this fact made you feel an ounce of shame. You should be over him. He showed his ass last year yet you’re not sure if the alarm bells that are going off in your head are due to actual warning or if they’re sounding off because you can’t seem to do anything other than overthink. It’s a terrible habit and an even more terrible predicament to be in.

“Am I jumping into this?,” you rub Noelle’s back absentmindedly, enjoying the weight of her in your arms to ground you. Maybe you should have given it a couple days. Did it seem desperate to message him so soon? You were supposed to hate his guts

“It was going to have to happen at some point, dear,” she shrugs while cleaning the kitchen, “You’ve left some bricks of milk in the freezer, you’ve left some spare bottles, diapers, all that. With Reid here to help me she’s in good hands times 2,”

Almost as if she had summoned him, Reid knocks and enters through her front door, a bright smile on his face that you’ve come to learn really helps calm you down. You were thankful for the connections you’ve made since being on your own.

These people were your village and you were in good hands, meaning Noelle was too.

“Gooooooood morning!!,” he claps, hugging Ms. Ernie before moving to you to steal a piece of bacon off your plate. Reid hugs you as well, taking Noelle from your arms.

“I can’t forget you, sunshine!,” he holds her up in the air and she screams in excitement, dropping her head on his chest when he pulls her in.

Ms. Ernie could tell your nerves were getting the best of you, it’s happened enough times to know that spaced out look on your eyes.

“Finish eating and get ready. You can take my car,” she scoots around the kitchen to set her keys on the counter.

“I can call an Uber” not wanting to impose

“Nonsense!,” she waves her hand with a frown, “Your car is back at the cabin, my car doesn’t get much use cause I always take my truck. It’s not a problem,”

Reid sits beside you and rubs your back as a means of comfort, it’s written all over your face that you’re distraught, you never did master your poker face.

“Hey, you got this,”

You drop your head on the table and can feel the tears welling once more.

“Am I stupid for letting him in so easily?,” the familiar knot was forming in your throat, warning that tears would soon begin to fall if you didn’t pull yourself together, “He literally told me he didn’t love me like he used to, then last night says he never stopped. It’s hurting my head. I went about year without him and now I’m going to meet him and I’m terrified,”

“Y/N,” Reid began, “How do eat an elephant?,”

You turn to him and frown at his question. But this is Reid, you know he’s about to say something corny.

“How?,”

“One bite at a time,” he comforts, “It’s okay to feel nervous. It’s okay to overthink all of this and it’s okay to think about the cons. But what if this turns into something good?,”

“It was supposed to be something good the first time,” you hiccup. It’s just tearing you apart all over again to think about what could have been if he’d tried harder back then. You could have been a happy family instead of going through this.

“But then I guess I wouldn’t have met you guys,”

“Exactly. Everything happens for a reason,” Ms. Ernie interjects, “But if you get back with him, you better not forget us,”

Her words were jaw dropping, you know she was saying it as a joke but there was a twinge of truth in them. You all have gotten so close and it would crush her if you left and never looked back.

“I would never dream of it,”

You arrived at the bakery an hour early. Your thoughts wouldn’t slow down unless you did and your nerves were on fire the closer it got.

Maybe this was a bad idea. No… this definitely was a bad idea, right? This bakery brought so many memories. What kind of self torture is it to recommend meeting at the place you two had your first date?

It’s 12 now and he’s still not here. Your chest starts to ache and you don’t know if stress is the cause or if it’s because you knew this was too good to be true.

The reality of having a baby scared him off. He wasn’t ready to be a parent. He’s a big shot rock star, sitting here with the realization made it click that he’s not ready to give that up. He loved his job too much.

It was now 12:06 and there was still no sign of him. You weren’t going to text him, he shouldn’t need a reminder, especially because he never followed up today.

Exhaling mournfully, you gather your belongings, standing up to leave when you hear the bell to the front door and heavy, pattering feet-

“I’m here!!,” panting, hands on his knees as he gets to the table, “I’m here! Accident blocked off the highway- had to take a detour- sped here, no parking. Had to park 2 blocks away so I ran,” he slid into the booth, running a hand through his hair to calm down.

His face was cherry red, chest rising and falling quickly, he looked beat. You don’t say a word, you just slip him your water and he whispers his gratitude just as he chugs it, taking a napkin to wipe his mouth.

“I don’t have her here with me,” a monotonous tone leaves you.

He nods, taking a second to compose himself, trying to get his heart rate down so that he could have a calm conversation.

“I expected that,” leaning back in his seat, his eyes settle in on you and you start to feel self conscious, “You’re still as beautiful as the day I met you,”

“Noah,”

“No, I know I fucked up, Y/N. Trust me, no one knows more than me,” he leans his elbows on the table, dipping his head to catch your eyes that way you can see he was being honest, “I’ve kicked myself in the ass ever since then,”

“I can’t just let you back in, Noah,”

“And I don’t expect you to,” his hand comes to his lips, pressing on them as he thinks, “Everyday I thought about you and what I could have done better. I have therapy now, I learned better coping mechanisms. I know that’s something I should have done before I got that bad, but I didn’t just do it for you I did it for me because I wasn’t treating myself the nicest either,”

Maybe you should have taken a page out of his book and gotten help, but with being a single parent, you didn’t really have time for that.

“I loved you and I still do. You said that you probably weren’t the one for me but you’ve got it so wrong,”

His words reverberate off the walls of your ear canal. This is why all of this is confusing. If he was going through something mentally, why wasn’t he honest instead of shattering you to pieces?

“You’re just saying that because there’s a baby in the picture,” you accuse.

“Ask Matt… ask Nicholas even. This has been going on since the day you left. Finding out about our daughter only solidified it even more that I want a life with you,”

There’s no way this is genuine.

“Noah, I can’t just trust y-,”

“I know. You set the pace, I will respect that,”

There.

Those words started to chip away at the walls that you’d built up. They must not have been very thick, or very strong. Or maybe Noah just had that ability.

“Do you… can I see pictures of her at least?,” He asks as if he’s nervous almost, “I get it if you don’t want to I just-,”

A part of you wanted to tell him no. You didn’t want to reveal her to him just yet. He should work a little harder to prove that he’s legitimate in his stance. A few words shouldn’t grant him this opportunity. Nevertheless, your iced out attitude began melting at his expression, showing him a couple pictures wouldn’t hurt.

“No I can,” you open your phone to your camera roll, having a whole album of her. You’ve taken pictures of her since the day you had her. She’s a beautiful baby and you suppose he could see pictures of his own child, he’s missed out on enough, hasn’t he?

“This is when she was born. I did a water birth,” you show him a picture of you holding her, umbilical cord still attached, “My medical staff was great,”

Then you slid through the album showing him other pictures absolutely adoring your daughter and how cute she is

“This is the first time she smiled at me,” you look at him and you can see the sparkle in his eyes as he stares at the screen. There was a gentle smile on his lips, registering in his mind that this little human was a piece of him.

“She’s a sweet baby. Doesn’t really cry, she’s a squealer when she laughs,”

You play videos of her giggling and babbling and he is instantly in love, seeing this look on his face stirs a guilt inside of you that you never felt before. Maybe he should have known. Things could have been resolved by now had you not been selfish.

But there’s that nagging little voice telling you that you deserved to be selfish at least once in your life. It felt like your mind was in a blender.

“What’s her name?,” he looks to you hopefully. Were you ready to give him that information? It’s silly but the more he knows, the easier it will be for him to tear down the walls you built around yourself. It’ll make it easier for him to weasel his way into the picture again and you weren’t sure yet if you wanted to keep this a co-parenting arrangement or what.

“You don’t have to tell me right now,” he sees the hesitation on your face.

“Noelle,” you answer softly, “Her name is Noelle. I named her after you. But we also call her Sunshine, Plum or Noey, that one’s new,”

He broke out in the brightest smile you’d ever seen. You missed that smile, those beautiful lips framing his beautiful teeth. It was a smile that once brought you peace that is now bringing confusion.

“That’s…,” he gives a breathy chuckle, using his fingers to press into his eyes to keep the tears at bay, “That’s lovely,”

“Yeah, look at who her mom is,” you flip your hair as a joke and suddenly the tension isn’t as heavy. You’re supposed to be icy right now but the hopeless romantic within you is fighting the broken-hearted girl. One could only guess who is winning.

“Yeah, exactly,” Noah is seen getting nervous as the conversation progresses, he doesn’t know what questions are off limits, “So what are you up to these days? You’re not at the library anymore,”

“You looked for me at the library?,” you frown. You left that place a long time ago.

“I sat out on the bench everyday for at least three months before we had to leave for tour,”

Why couldn’t he give you that energy before? Where he used to meet you outside on the bench after you got off, sometimes with a bouquet of your favorite flowers, and sometimes with your favorite take out and you’d have little date nights on the library bench. Why did that flame have to die?

Was life about to present you with new, better tools? Improved ways to bring it back? To make it a raging forest fire that can’t be put out? A lover like you can only hope.

“I work from home. With finding out about Noelle I needed something relaxed, I’m still in the field of library science. I work as an analyst,”

His eyebrows perked up, just like the first time you two ever met when you told him what you did for a living. His interest now was a big 180 from last year.

“Y/N that’s.. that’s amazing,” he leans forward, prompting you to talk about it more. You go on and on about your job, about how cool it is to you and he sat there and listened. Not once did he break eye contact, he interacted with the conversation and it felt like things were how they used to be.

“How’s the Bad Omens life?,” you ask, finally getting winded from talking about yourself.

Noah plasters a look of pride on his face. You wanted so badly to keep up with them but that would do you a disservice while trying to mend what was hurting you.

“It’s great! We’re blowing up, so many more places we can tour now, merch sales are off the hook. We have a new one dropping soon and I uh… I designed one for Noelle, I’ll just need her size,”

His words caught you off guard. How does he have something planned for her already?

“Noah,” he’s got you swooning so easily. This was your Noah.

Snap out of it, Y/N!

If he’s serious, make him work for it.

“I think it’s pretty cute! Nicholas and I brainstormed on it together, it’s a Bad Omens x Noelle exclusive,”

The laughter that escaped you was a melody Noah thought he’d never hear again. When it dies down, his mouth begins to itch with a question he’s been wondering for a long time now.

“Are you,” he clears his throat, “Are you seeing anyone?,”

Your eyes flicker at his question, adjusting in your seat. Snatching the cup of water that was on the table, looking him in his eyes when you set it down after a sip.

“I told you,” tongue in cheek, playing with your fingers to ease your mind, “I wouldn’t be able to fall in love with anyone else. You were it for me,”

You search his eyes, wanting to cry for the sole basis that you never thought you’d see them again. They were the eyes you looked to whenever you were desolate, excited, or livid. No matter what you were feeling you could simply look at him and he was always there, until he wasn’t.

“I meant it when I said I loved you and you fucking sat there and told me that you didn’t love me like you used to,”

“I don’t know why I said that-,”

“It gutted me,” anguish covers your face like a mask, trying to keep yourself from crying while that night replays in your mind like a movie, “You just sat there like it didn’t even hurt you,”

“It hurt me like you wouldn’t believe,” he persisted

“So why didn’t you try?,” your lip hurts from biting it so hard, if you don’t stop it’ll bleed soon enough, “I gave you so much of me, even up until I couldn’t, when I had nothing left and you just… sat there!,”

“I was an idiot,” he admitted, “I fucked up when I decided to love my career more than anything. I messed up when I let it weigh me down,”

“I don’t care that you loved your career, Noah. I cared whether you showed up for us or not. You did until you became complacent,”

“I know I didn’t,” he answers, “I know I didn’t try hard enough. I know I gave up too quickly and those decisions have been haunting me every fucking day. I know I made this bed but I don’t wanna lie in it anymore,”

Taking a napkin from the table to wipe your eyes, you look around to make sure no one is looking at you. You thought in your mind that you’d be stronger but deep down, you expected the tears even though it’s embarrassing to be this emotional in public.

“Were you even honest with everyone or did you make me the villain?,”

“I told them it was mutual,” he confesses in shame.

Choking on your sobs, you shake your head and just look out the window, “So you made them think I just skipped town? That’s so fucked up, Noah. I would have never done that to you,”

“I will tell them the truth,” He panicked, “I don’t know why I lied to them I just… I knew they’d make the guilt worse and I figured the damage was done. I knew if they knew the truth they’d make me reach out but after that I didn’t have the right to reach out to fix it,”

There’s a silence that floats between you two after his words. The culpability of hurting you ate at him while the heartache gnawed away at you.

Both were parasites feeding on their hosts. Ruining their lives, doing their best to reduce them to nothing.

The parasitism ends here though.

“If-” you hiccup, gathering your things, “If you want even a sliver of a chance of being in Noelle’s life… of us getting back together, of us being a family… then you’ll start with being honest with our friends,”

Noah was so anxious that he just might throw up. He wanted you back and he didn’t want to miss out on having a family. He’s missed out on enough due to his own transgressions.

It took Noah a few days to muster up the strength to tell everyone. Every time he tried, he stumbled over his words and gave up. He had to do this though, it wasn’t fair to lie on your name to save his face.

Noah found himself with the guys, all gathered for game night. Snacks spread out all over the table, Folio was high, laughing while throwing a squid at Matt on the course, fucking up Matt’s winning streak. All of them were having a good time but Noah couldn’t focus on having fun, what he was about to confess wasn’t fun by any means. After a few rounds of Mario Kart, he paused the game and sighed, many groans of dismay being heard around the living room.

“What’s your problem?,” Jolly questioned, “I was about to whoop your ass on the Bone-Dry Dunes!,”

Noah felt his breathing pick up. It was now or never.

“It wasn’t mutual,” he blurts out, heart racing in his chest, he can hear his blood rushing in his ears.

“The fuck are you talking about?,” Folio burps obnoxiously loud and Bryan kicks him for being gross about it.

“Y/N and I, the break up wasn’t mutual,” he finds his switch controller a lot more interesting than the feeling of their eyes burning holes into his skin.

“Again, that begs the question… what the fuck are you talking about?,” Matt’s voice sounds strained, like he knows and is getting irritated with the suspense.

“Before she left. I told her that I didn’t love her like I used to. I got overwhelmed with the band. I was… I got deep in my head and started to self sabotage. I neglected her and I fucked up,”

A stillness dresses the air, Noah can feel the tension. He can’t bring himself to look up and see their expressions, he’s ashamed, he should be. How did he go so long with this secret? How did he go about his life knowing he broke the trust of one of the sweetest souls that walked this Earth?

“Woah…,” Davis muttered in a daze. His single word response was enough to have all hell breaking loose.

“I’m going to kick your fucking ass!,” Nicholas threw his controller at Noah, heat from his frustration reddening his cheeks, “Are you fucking kidding me, Noah? Is that why she ran off?,”

“That’s exactly why,” he nodded, cursing at himself. He feels so embarrassed to say it out loud. This is the first he’s ever admitted this outside of therapy. These are people that mattered, people whose opinions mattered the most.

Matt sat up like he’d seen a ghost, a light bulb moment happening for him, “That’s why she didn’t tell you about the baby,”

“BABY?!,” Folio screeched, “where the fuck was I?!,” Hands stuck out as if to gesture “wtf” Folio was always ten steps behind everyone else, even when he was in the room at the time of conversations.

“You were super high, you passed out,” Jolly waved at him to shut up, turning to Noah, “You’re our brother which means I have to be honest. That is a dick ass move, Noah. She was nothing but patient with you. She loved you, supported you even when it was hard because you were gone all the time. What the fuck?,”

“She was always there no matter what you needed,” Bryan added, while it took a while for you to open up to everyone, when you did, they became your little family, “She was always there for you, always there for us,”

“I miss when she packed our lunches for the studio,” Folio sighed like he was daydreaming. Once again finding it hard to read the room.

“Not the time!,” Nicholas gritted through his teeth

“I’m just saying!,” Folio defended, “She took care of all of us,”

Nicholas stuck out his hand to shut Folio up. If there was anyone up in arms about this, it was him. They all became your family and it hurt them when you left without a word. Now that he knows the full story, it makes him livid to know it was Noah who pushed you away. This could have been avoided.

“We were worried sick about her, Noah!,” Nicholas was more upset than any of them, and that’s saying a lot, the others were quite upset, “That girl who stuttered over her words the first time she met you still stuttered after years of being with you because she loved you, because you still made her nervous! After years of being with you she was still smitten and because of the stress.. you… y-you say that shit to her?,”

Noah really had no rebuttal. He knew Nicholas was right. There were no words for him to defend himself with. It almost brought him to tears, unsettled by his own behavior and now that other people know… now that the people closest to him know- it changes everything and forces him to reflect even more.

“Instead of talking to her, talking to us to keep you from doing something so stupid- instead of doing.. anything! You pull a coward ass move!,”

Nicholas viewed you as if you were a younger sibling, taking you under his wing, understanding your reclusive personality. He was the first person you connected to outside of Noah. He had a feeling when he only ever got vague answers when asking about the break up.

“It was time I was honest. I want to make this right with her. I want a chance to see my daughter and be a dad but it starts with honesty.” Noah mumbled, “I just want her back and I want a second chance whether I deserve it or not. I want to be there for Y/N like I always should have been. I want to be there for Noelle. I’m sorry it took so long to come clean.”

“Yeah?,” Matt’s jaw clenches as he ponders what has been said. He has his own thoughts regarding the matter but Nicholas seemed to cover them all for the most part, “I hope she makes you work like hell for it!,”

All Noah can really do is agree, they’re right. He was a coward, he did take the easy way out instead of facing his own problems and insecurities, and you should make him work like hell to get you back, to earn his place in Noelle’s life.

“Noelle,” Folio trails off, giggling to himself as he says the name, “Noeeeellee,”

“Dude, shut the fuck up!,” Jolly shouted with a bit of laughter layered underneath, Folio is such an airhead, it’s hard to have serious conversations like this around him. At least it eases some tension.

“It’s a cute name!!,”

“She’s an adorable baby,” Matt confirmed, “I only got a glimpse of her but she looks just like Noah,”

“Nah,” Noah shook his head, “She has my eyes but she has the curl of Y/N’s lashes. She has my lips but she has her mama’s chin. She has my dimples but Y/N’s cheeks. She’s both Y/N and me. She’s beautiful,”

Davis scoffs, raising his eyes, “Well you better get your shit together,”

“Yeah! I’m ready to be one kick ass uncle!,”

“Shut up, Folio!,”

You had taken it upon yourself to unblock everyone, figuring that if Noah told them the truth that they’d want to reach out, which they did.

It was scary at first, Noah had been a coward but you had your cowardly moments as well. Running off and not saying a word to people who cared about you- it wasn’t the nicest thing to do. Going through this with Noah had you realizing there are some things you would have done differently. This is a time of self reflection for everyone.

Although you’d been talking with them over the last week or so, you didn’t let the conversation stray too far from how you were doing. You weren’t ready to introduce them to Noelle or the idea of her just yet, you’re sure Noah has talked about her a bunch but you didn’t want to get too close to everyone again as of right now.

Ms. Ernie and Reid have been watching Noelle while you and Noah rebuild yourselves.

Dates that you made sure to let him know weren’t ‘actual dates’, walks at the park that turned into introspective discussions. It was all a work in progress and it made Ms. Ernie’s words hit even harder, there’s a lot to learn about love and that sometimes second chances are worth it.

You made him work like hell, but he was doing pretty well. He had different plans each day you guys hung out. He was attentive. He was gentle, he even told you about what he and his therapist talked about after each session.

In reality, you could tell he was doing better. You still had some reservations and there was still a long way to go but ultimately he was making a true effort. You could see the change he was making. Granted, it was a change that should have happened a long time ago but things happen the way they’re supposed to and when they’re supposed to.

That sentiment itself was a hard pill to swallow.

Today he took you on a picnic in the park, packed your favorite foods and drinks. He was really laying it on thick, others might find it cringe but it was making your heart flutter.

“I never did thank you, for telling them the truth,” popping a grape in your mouth, “I know it wasn’t easy,”

“It needed to happen. I knew better and I shouldn’t have lied to them but most importantly, I shouldn’t have lied on you. I was a coward and that’s not who I want to be to you… or Noey,”

A pleasant hum emitted from your chest, brows raising at the nickname that left his mouth.

“That one seemed to stick, huh?,”

“Noey is different… and it’s super close to Noah,”

“Noelle is already close to Noah!,” you bicker, both of you in high spirits while you go back and forth

“Noah has four letters and so does Noey,”

“Oh you’re such a kiss ass!,” you push him and he falls over dramatically.

“Help! Someone help!,” he shouted, feigning like he was injured

“Oh my God, Noah, stop! Someone is gonna think you’re serious!,” you reach over him to cover his mouth but he licks it and you squeal

“EEUUUGHHH!! You’re so gross!!,” you yank your hand back, he’s laughing like a hyena. Eyes wrinkling, hand in his chest and head thrown back.

“You used to do that to me all the time!” Justifying his action, you stick your tongue out at him while wiping your wet palm on his cheek

“Which means you can’t steal my move!,”

It was tense the first couple of meet ups and each one gets you closer to bringing Noelle around. These past couple of times had broken the ice and it started to feel like time hadn’t passed.

“Hey uhm, are you?- do you still live at the house?”

Noah settles down, feeling the energy shift to something a little more serious.

“Yeah. Didn’t have the guts to move. Why?,”

You twist grapeless vine in your hands, afraid to say the words now that you’re feeling comfortable to bring it up. It’s about 2 months of this and Noelle is a little over 6 months now.

“I’d like to bring Noelle by,”

Noah struggled for air, coughing up his drink and you can’t help but snicker at the liquid dripping off his chin.

“What?,” his eyes are as big as saucers

“Unless you’re not ready. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed,”

“No! No, I.. Y/N you have no idea how much I would love that,”

If you weren’t mistaken, you swear you see tears welling in his eyes

“I’d love to meet my daughter,”

This was a big step for you and an even bigger one for Noah. Both of you were scared beyond your wits.

“I’d like for it to just be us and then we can work up to getting the guys to meet her? And then you can meet Ms. Ernie, Reid and his husband, Morgan,”

You had to make sure to set some ground rules, Noah responded without any issues knowing that at the end of the day- you call the shots and he has to abide by them if he wants this to work. Yet despite feeling good about all of this, there’s still a smidge of uncertainty.

“What’s on your mind?,” even after all the time spent apart, reading you was like muscle memory.

“I still feel resentful,” you look to him to see his shoulders sagging, “I know you’re tired of it,”

“I don’t expect you to get over any of this anytime soon. In a way, you’re grieving and I can’t police how long you mourn. I can only help ease it,”

You didn’t really think of what you were going through as mourning but you guess you can see the similarities. What you two had was long gone and even in the face of starting over, albeit with the same person, you were still allowed to miss how things were and feel a bit out of sorts about what happened.

“It’s just,” you watch his hands as he picks at his palms, a nervous tick he’s always had. You’re once again feeling a sort of guilt making him feel like this but it’s a price he has to pay, right? You didn’t ask to be hurt to begin with.

“Resentment is so weird. I want to forgive you, Noah. So fucking bad I want to forgive you because I can’t keep doing this with you, I wish I could forget so I could just… hug you, kiss you, hold your hand like we used to,”

“You set the pace, Y/N. I told you no matter what, I respect it. I wish I could take it all back. God, I wish there was a way for me to go back so I didn’t fuck up and hurt you,”

“And my mind is struggling to comprehend why the fuck you would do that to me,” anger bleeds into your tone.

Noah is seen blubbering like a fish out of water as he tries to find his words. You can see the cogs turning in his mind, recalling the very night he ruined what you two had.

“There’s no explanation,” he declared, there was nothing good enough to excuse why he did what he did.

“No excuse, no reasoning that will ever be good enough for what I said to you. For how I treated you. It was unacceptable and there are no words to describe how apologetic I am. All I can say is, is that I’m so thankful you’re here, even giving me this chance,”

“You were all I could think about,” turning your body to him, he needed to know the turmoil you endured, “You hadn’t touched me in almost 3 months by the night I left. I was so consumed with the stress I didn’t realize I missed my period. I went to the doctor and that’s when I heard our little girl’s heartbeat,”

It didn’t get past him that you finally said our daughter and not just “my”. At this point, he has turned to look at you, listening closely, making sure you knew he was paying attention.

“I moved to the countryside and that’s where I met Ms. Ernie and Reid. They were my people while I was managing heartbreak. Keeping myself physically and mentally healthy so I could bring Noelle into this world. You… you should have been there Noah, you could’ve been there,”

“I know,” he blinks, tears falling down his cheeks just like yours were, “I missed out on so much because I couldn’t get my own shit together,”

“I took that pain and restructured it to fuel me so I could be the best parent I could be. I never thought I’d be sitting here in front of you. I never expected to see you again. Ever. But despite all the alarm bells, I am so fucking glad I am because I missed you, Noah. But I hate you so much at the same time,”

His face fashioned that of anguish at your last few words. It was hurting him but he didn’t look away from you, he didn’t hide his eyes, he’s now feeling what you felt that night and then some.

The anxiety. The fear, the fucking aching that burned from his gut all the way up into his throat. The pounding in his head, the heat that blanketed his skin. He can’t believe he did this to you. He can’t believe he sat across from you at the table that night, watching you fall apart and still said what he said.

“I don’t know how you expect us to rebuild anything,” your voice flows into his ears and he can feel his chest tightening, finding it harder to keep his breathing at a normal pace.

“Hell, I don’t even know how I expect us to rebuild anything but I’m going to try because that’s what you should have done!,”

“I-I know. Fuck, I.. I’m aware,” taking a deep breath to try to swallow his cries.

“I’m going to do what you couldn’t do,” a wild fire burns behind your eyes and he realizes this is a new you. The soft spoken Y/N is still there but this version of you takes no shit. You have a daughter now, you had to build tough skin

“I’m going to prove to you that fighting for what you want isn’t a lost fucking cause. I’m going to show you that no matter what is going on in your head, no matter what the voices are telling you- that I am here and I will be here until we are dust returned to the universe, Noah,”

You hated to see the way he dug his fingernails into his palms and you wanted nothing more than to grab his hands to massage the tension and cramps away.

“I know this is eating at you,” you whisper, “For the longest time I wanted it to. But not anymore,”

A great tremor overtook him, flexing his jaw to ease the ache from clenching it so hard. He had to break eye contact just this once to look up at the sky to will the tears away.

“Just take a page out of my book and take what you’re feeling to change and be better. No more apologies. Don’t be sorry, be better,”

“You sure you got everything?,” Reid packed your diaper bag into the front while you buckled Noelle into her carseat.

“Yeah I got my cooler for the bricks. My pump, extra clothes, extra wipes-,” you continue to list other items and at this point you’re not listing them to Reid, you’re listing them because you’re scared. 

“You got this,” Ms. Ernie kisses your cheek and you look at her with worry, “Don’t look at me like that. You both are going to be okay. He’s been groveling for weeks on end, he’s been respectful, if you want to back out I’m sure he’d understand?,”

“No! No. I think I’m ready. She’s already 6 months old now, he deserves this much,” It’s crazy to think that you’ve been at this with Noah for about a few months now.

You’re wrapped in an embrace of them both, Reid whispering words of reassurance as he pulls away, helping you settle in the car.

“Let us know when you get there, okay?,” Ms. Ernie waves from her front step.

You assure her that you’ll do just that. A lively wave is sent their way as you pull out of the driveway to make it to a house that you once called home, a house that could have been a home for Noelle. 

You didn’t need a GPS, you’d never forget the way there even if you tried. You could drive there blindfolded. The drive really wasn’t that long and a part of you wishes it was because when you pull up your stomach is full of butterflies. 

He’s probably nervous too. Don’t stress about it. As if he was waiting by the door, he’s out on the porch, wiping his hands on a paper towel when you exit your vehicle.

“Need help with anything?,” a nervous smirk across his face, he looks like he’s going to throw up at any second.

“Wanna grab the diaper bag and cooler?,”

He didn’t give a verbal answer. He was already down the steps and to your car before you finished asking. You grabbed Noelle’s carrier and waited for him to get the other items. Seeing him with the lavender diaper bag on his shoulder stirred a feeling inside of you. He looked like a dad, he looked good. A yearn made itself present in your body, you just wanted to be a family.

“Follow me,” 

You could tell he was excited, excited but tense. He didn’t want to fuck this up. 

Once you’re settled in the house, he heads upstairs, mumbling that he’ll be right back. When taking your jacket off to hang it on the second hook on the back of the door, you realize the hook still has your name on it. He never took it off, this was your hook, everyone knew not to hang their things on it. And beside yours, you see one for Noelle. Noah, Y/N and Noelle. Your fingers brush against the names and a smile creeps on your face.

“I know she probably already has one but I figured it would be nice if she had one here. She’ll probably end up falling asleep depending on how long you stay,”

You turn around to see a lavender playpen with her name on the side.

“In a lot of the videos and pictures you showed me, she’s wearing lavender so..,”

“Noah,” you coo, stepping over to him, “That’s so sweet,” 

You turn to Noelle in her carrier and unbuckle her, “If you wanna go wash your hands, you can hold her,”

“Yeah?,” his eyes lit up like a little kid on Christmas. He didn’t even wait for you to answer before he’s jogging into the kitchen to scrub his hands clean. About a good minute later he’s rushing back in but he seems hesitant. 

“Don’t worry,” you assure him, “I show her pictures just like I show you pictures. She knows you. She won’t really be fussy” 

You cradle her while handing her over to him.

“She likes to be held like this, just support her neck,” 

Noah takes her from you softly, his large hands make her seem so small, even at six months. He stares at her in awe and sits down gently. Noelle babbles at him, waving her hands and smiling. 

“Hiii, baby girl,” 

You can hear the tears as he speaks to her and you take a seat beside him, not bothered by how close you were.

“I’m your papa,” he chokes on his words, caressing her cheek with the back of his finger, “You’re so beautiful just like your mama,”

There weren’t many words said as Noah soaked in this moment with you watching. His breath is silently hitching from his tears but he only cries harder when Noelle reaches out and touches his cheek, seemingly wiping a tear away.

Noah sits back on the sofa, setting his feet flat on the cushion so he could lay Noelle on his thighs so that she was sitting up.

“You’re so sweet,” he kisses her hand, causing her to squeal and giggle. He looks to you with wide eyes and a bright smile

“You were right!,” 

“I told you!!,” you lean closer and watch the way Noelle is taking in the moment as well. She stares at Noah with a look of bewilderment, she’s never been around him physically yet relaxes into him like she’s known him since day one. She knows that’s her papa.

“Thank you,” he says simply, “I’m far from deserving but thank you so much, Y/N,”

“You deserve to be a dad, Noah. And she deserves one,”

“I won’t fuck this up,”

“You better not,” you poke his cheek, “Because she needs you… we both do,”

You let Noah record videos of him and her, letting him make up for lost time. He carefully danced around the living room with her while playing happy baby songs.

“I heard songs like this make them happy!,” he insisted. Each time she squealed he hugged her tighter, absolutely adoring the sound of his baby laughing with him. You couldn’t help but record some videos of your own, wanting to look back at this moment. 

The foundation still needed some work but what is life without the effort? What’s love without effort? He said he wouldn’t screw it up this time and you’re holding him to his word.

“She’s down for bed,” Noah comes down the stairs, heading to the kitchen to return with two mugs 

“She’s never fallen asleep that fast,” taking a mug from him, you smell your favorite tea in the way he used to make it. 

“Does she wake you up throughout the night? I can be on baby duty so you can rest. U-unless you planned on going home tonight. I can drive you home, I don’t want you driving while you’re tired,” he offered.

“Can we stay?,” circling the rim of your cup, finding the heat from your tea comforting. 

“You two always have a place here,” he sets the baby monitor on the table and takes a sip of his coffee. He was always a late night coffee drinker, at least it was decaf, he just liked the taste. 

There was a comfortable lull that fell over you two and sitting on this very couch in this living room felt like home, like you belonged here. You made a home out of the cabin in the countryside but *this… this is where you felt like you were meant to be. Drinking your warm beverages on the couch while your child slept, simply enjoying each other’s company.

Noah randomly stands up and turns the tv on. He’s getting a game console, plugging it up and connecting the remotes. You’re watching in confusion while he does this all as if he’s on a mission. 

Once he gets everything connected he pulls out a game case. 

Michael Jackson: The Experience

“Nooaaaaaah,” you say suspiciously, “What are you doing?,” setting your cup on the side table, you watch with a questioning frown when he moves the coffee table

“Stand up,” insisting with a wide grin, he takes your hand despite your wariness

“What are we doing, Sebastian?” 

“We’re putting all those nights practicing with the music videos to use. I scored these at a yard sale and figured we could dance to some good ole Michael like we used to,” 

He hands you a Wii remote and the butterflies erupt again, spotting the same broken lampshade that he still hasn’t gotten rid of. 

“You think you still got it?,” you tease, wrapping the band around your wrist. 

He scoffs loudly, rolling his eyes, “You wish I lost it,” 

“Put your money where your mouth is,” 

He side eyes you with a little smirk, choosing the song he wanted to dance to. You expected Thriller, hell maybe even Ghosts. But he surprised you when he chose Do You Remember the Time

“If I win. I get to take you out on a romantic date,” he sighs triumphantly, he knows since you two started to rebuild something new, you didn’t want to get too romantic just yet.

“Okay,” you nod confidently, much to his surprise, “But if I win… you’re on baby duty for a night. That means getting up to feed her, change her diaper, cuddle-,”

“All I’m seeing is a win-win situation here,” turning back to the screen he hits play, “Bring your A game. I’ve been practicing for this very moment,” 

He says it as if he’s joking but he was serious. This was a song you two spent many nights listening to, belting it at the top of your lungs during late night drives, to dancing in the kitchen to it after date night. 

This little gesture may seem like just a night of dancing to a game to you but it was much more to him. So when the gold room appeared on the screen after picking your characters, he became timorous.

The beat begins and you feel a little silly following the movements at first. You hadn’t danced with Noah in ages but he probably feels just as goofy. You notice him missing a few beats and peak to see him adoring you, the way your nose crinkles when you smile, the way your eyes move across the screen, trying to focus.

“You’re not gonna win if you keep staring at me, Sebastian!,” 

“Fuck!,”

~Do you remember when we fell in love? We were young and innocent then~

You trip over your feet as the dance begins to incorporate footwork, glaring at Noah when you hear him laughing at you.

~Do you remember, back in the fall? We’d be together all day long~

You bend your knees and shimmy your feet along the carpet while Noah stands tall and moves in the opposite direction over you. Feeling him this close, despite just playing a game, had your heart palpitating. 

You never thought you’d have nights like this again. With anyone, let alone Noah. 

You hear Noah singing to himself while he follows the dance moves to a T, seeing his score get higher than yours had you ready to wreck his streak.

“Do you remember the time when weeee first met, girl?” He sang obnoxiously while looking at you, purposely singing off key. You snicker at his expressions, missing a move but you can’t bring yourself to care. 

Noah seemed so carefree and comfortable in this moment that it started to overshadow what had once hurt you, somewhat putting it on the back burner. 

~Those sweet memories, will always be dear to me~

You and Noah are now face to face, chest to chest, you two seemed to forget the game. Both of you breathing heavily from laughing and going all out on the dance moves.

“You’re gonna lose,” you pipe up, turning around to focus back on the game. You knew that if you stood there any longer you’d have kissed him. 

Noah seemed to snap out of his daze, immediately hopping back into where he was. You have to squat in front of him for the next move and it seems to last forever, feeling the burn like you’re in the gym.

“Oh my God!,” groaning in relief when you’re finally able to move from your position but the relief doesn’t last long when you’re made to go back, moving your arms up and feeling his hands touch yours. 

It sounds dramatic but you swear you feel a little tingle when he touches you. Maybe it was static or maybe it was the fact you missed his touch. A sensation that you felt so safe in, so comfortable and loved. 

You two slide away from each other, swinging your arms back and forth. You’re still following the screen but Noah decides to freestyle. Falling to his knees to sing the song to you, you’d worry about waking Noelle up but she was a deep sleeper. 

“Do you remember girl?,” he holds his fists up, singing passionately, “On the phone! You and me!! Till dawn, 2 or 3. What about us, GIRL!!,” 

You can’t help but throw your head back in entertainment at his dramatics. He was a performer for sure.

“Do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya- in the park, on the beach! You and me, in Spain! What about, what about- rrrap tap tap, rrrap tap tap!,”

His ad libs bounce off the walls and you’re losing it.

“You look insane!,” you say over his off-key singing. 

He continues to sing despite your judgment, standing up and grabbing you by the shoulders, shaking you playfully

“Yeah! Yeah! Wooo!!,” 

The game is now complete and you fall back on the couch to catch your breath.

“I freestyled and I STILL won!,” he claps and points at you, “Pick out your prettiest dress, doll face because we’re going on a DATE!,” 

He stands in front of you, hands on his hips in victory and all you can do is cherish the view.

“Come here,” you stand before him, hearing your heart pound in your ears as he steps forward until his chest is level with your eyes, his famous chain glinting in the light on the room.

“What’s up?,” the confidence he just displayed was now replaced with diffidence. 

“You better not hurt me again,” it was strange being this close to him, “If you hurt me you’ll not only lose me but Sunshine as well and I don’t want that for her. So if this is going to happen- you talk to me when your insecurities set in. You talk to me before you self sabotage. You talk to me no matter what so that you continue to show up for our little girl. Do you understand me?,”

Noah nods his head so quickly that you think it just might fall off and roll away.

“I understand. I won’t make the same mistake twice. I love you and I love our baby. I was a fool to fuck up the first time. I won’t be that again,” 

“Good,” you nod, stepping away before patting his cheek with a sly grin.

“Because you’re on baby duty tonight,” 

His jaw drops at your antics, he doesn’t mind really. He’s starting to feel like an actual father now.

“But I won!!,”

You wake up abruptly to Noelle screeching, a type of cry you’ve never heard before and you turn to see Noah’s spot empty. Scrambling to get out of bed, you rush downstairs to see him panicking, tears in his eyes and red in the face

“I’m sorry,” he muttered to her, frantically trying to calm her 

“What happened??,” you kept your composure, not wanting to stress him out anymore than he already is. He hands you Noelle and he pulls at his roots, absolutely distraught and upset with himself.

“She was hungry and I… I heated up her milk for too long. Fuck, Y/N I’m sorry I didn’t mean to-,”

“Noah,” a soft hand on his chest, “It happens. She’s okay,” 

“I made her cry,” 

“She’s okay,” you reassure, “See,” you wipe her tears and she’s just left whimpering now.

You take his hand to sit him down at the table and give Noelle back to him despite his fear

“Don’t tense up. She’ll feel it and become fussy. Relax,” 

He took heed to your words, relaxing so that Noelle could follow suit.

“I should have put a brick in the fridge to thaw,” you mention, “I usually do if I know I’ll be too tired to breastfeed but I was exhausted so it slipped my mind. A brick will usually thaw in the fridge overnight and when it’s time, just set it in a cup of warm water for a few minutes and you’ll be good to go,” 

You take her bottle and run it under some cool water, testing it on your wrist, deeming it cool yet warm enough for her to drink. You sit beside Noah and hand him the bottle. 

“Here, you’re all set. 45 degree angle while she drinks,” you instruct. He follows your words and Noelle hums around the bottle, cuddling into Noah’s shirtless chest, “She likes skin to skin contact while feeding. Now she’ll really know you’re her papa,” 

You realize this is the same table he broke your heart at, tracing the pattern of the mahogany wood. You wouldn’t let that night haunt you anymore. Here’s to new memories. Now, this table will be remembered as the table that he fed your daughter for the first time, a learning experience for him. 

“I’m so sorry for hurting you, honey,” he whispered to her, kissing her forehead while her eyes fluttered sleepily, “I’m still learning but it won’t happen again,” 

You know his words were directed to you as well, finding solace in the reassurance. 

Once you teach him to burp her, the three of you make your way upstairs and back to bed.

“You can put her in the crib,” climbing into the bed that was once yours to claim. He took the time to build her crib and didn’t even wanna put her in it.

“I will once I’m ready to sleep, I just want to spend time with her is all,” 

Despite the infant sleeping, he wasn’t ready to put her down. His hair was thrown all over his head, his eyes here heavy but he was willing to fight sleep just to hold her in his arms for as long as he could. 

“I missed out on enough, I just wanna hold her,” 

“Okay,” you nod, sitting up and scooting closer to rest your head on his shoulder, “Sing, you are my sunshine, to her. It’s her favorite song and I think she would like to hear it from you,” 

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine,” he begins with ease, “You make me happy, when skies are grey. You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away,” 

“You are my star shine,” you add in, “My only star shine,” 

You reach over to hold her small hand, resting your hand on his chest,

“I love you so much, each night and day,” 

Noah leans his head on yours, finding comfort in the words you sing. 

“You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you. Please don’t take my star shine away,” 

You look up to Noah, refusing to move your head off his shoulder so he rears back to look at you, your face being illuminated by the little nightlight you had plugged in for Noelle.

“You are my love shine, my only love shine,” he sings lowly, surprising you that he even knows the third verse of the nursery rhyme, “I miss you so much when you’re away,” 

The smile that appeared on your face was one he’ll never forget, especially when you begin to harmonize with him quietly, watching the way Noelle snuggles into his chest as if she can’t get close enough to him. 

“You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you,” you two sing together, curling into him even more when he plants a kiss on the crown of your head.

“Please don’t take my love shine awaaaay,” 

Days had passed since that night. You and Noah alternate every couple of nights of whose place to stay at. He finally got the pleasure of meeting Ms. Ernie and Reid officially, offering his gratitude to the people who kept you and Noelle safe when he fell short. Despite his own shortcomings, they welcomed him with open arms. 

Reid currently had Noelle in the living room, both of them watching some cartoon movie while Ms. Ernie helped you with your hair, preparing for the night Noah had planned for you. 

“Do I look like I’m trying too hard?,” you turn to her, concern painted all over your face.

“You look like a beautiful youngin who is about to steal the heart of the love of their life,” 

“You flatter me,”

“Well it’s true,” she boops your nose and tucks your hair behind your ear, “You’re going to have fun!,” 

Noah wouldn’t exactly tell you what he had planned. He just said to dress in something comfortable and cute, so you stepped out of your comfort zone, going with a light floral dress, styling your hair to your comfort and a light face of makeup. 

When you heard the doorbell to your cabin go off, your stomach sank.

“Oh goodness!!,” turning to the smiling woman above you, “He’s here!! He’s 10 minutes early!,”

A light rumble comes from her, shaking her head and standing you up, “You would have still freaked out even if he showed up on time. Head up there!,”

You didn’t have time to respond due to the doorbell ringing again. A nervous Noah stood on the other side, worried that maybe you changed your mind. When the door swung open, both of you were speechless. 

You stood there, radiant as ever with Noelle in your arms. A nervous grin framed your teeth and Noah watched as you rubbed Noelle’s back, not for her comfort but for yours. You were antsy. Just as beautiful as the first day he met you when he knocked your bus token out of your hand.

Noah stood there in a plain, white shirt tucked into a pair of sleek black joggers. You noticed he cut his hair, cutting the sides short and keeping the top longer. He recreated the outfit he wore when you two first bumped into each other.

“Hi,” your throat tight around the simple word.

“H-hi,” he had a hand behind his back and stuck the other out, “Nice to meet you, my name is Noah,” 

You frown at his words until you realize this is a reintroduction.

“Hi, Noah. My name is Y/N and it’s wonderful to meet you,” 

Both of you are similar to giddy teenagers falling in love for the first time. He handed you a bouquet of your favorite flowers and you were quick to gasp. You loved flowers, you loved it even more when he gifted them to you.

Inviting him in, Noelle was quick to reach for him and he spun her around while you retrieved the glass milk bottle you received from Ms. Ernie to use as a vase.

“Looking gooooood!,” the elderly woman entered the room and pinched Noah’s cheek lightly.

“I can clean up nice!,” 

Reid entered the space and gave his compliments to the both of you and caught sight of the flowers, nudging Noah.

“Nice choice,” he whispered.

Once both of you give Noelle a ton of kisses, Noah takes your hand and guides you out to the car so you all could get your evening started.

“You gonna tell me what you have planned yet?,” hounding him as he begins to drive. 

“Dinner,” he answers, a smirk on his face to tell you that it wasn’t just dinner.

“Why so cryptic?” you poke him

“Relaaaaax,” he reaches over to grab your hand and squeeze. The two of you missing this simple gesture, feeling safe like this, like all will be okay, it will- but you’ll never get tired of the warm feeling of security. 

Noah took you out to your favorite restaurant, a nice night of expensive wine and taking bites of the other’s food. A bunch of blushing, a bunch of butterflies, laughter and unspoken I love yous. 

Now you find yourself with your hand in his, strolling downtown, him insisting that the night isn’t over. When you stop walking, you peer up to him and see an uncertain smirk on his face. Looking up to the sign on the building, you see what he had planned.

“Kiln of Sunshine,” you read aloud, “Couple’s pottery?”

All he does is laugh at your surprise and leads you inside. There aren’t many couples but it’s a nice intimate place. Dim lights strung up on the ceiling, custom printed aprons with your names on it, which he helps you put on and tie. 

When you’re directed to your designated spots, he sits behind you while you sit in front of the wheel.

“Welcome to the Kiln of Sunshine! We are a couple of potters who met through our love of art,” a young woman stands in front of the class, it’s hard to listen when Noah is so close like this. He still makes you so damn nervous.

“We created this abode to help other couples not only find a new hobby, but also grow together by means of communication and teamwork through making art!” The woman’s husband added with excitement. 

You look over your shoulder to see Noah already looking at you

“You look so beautiful,” he whispers. You have to tuck your chin into your shoulder to hide the fact your face was burning up at his compliment. 

The couple teaching gives you all step by step instructions to begin and then it’s just you and Noah left to your own devices. They gave you the guidelines but now it’s up to you and Noah to decide what you two create.

Much like a relationship. 

“Here, let’s try this,” Noah’s large, clay covered hands form to yours, his chin resting on your shoulder, “Pinch here,”

“Maybe we should coil instead,” suggesting lightly. 

“Okay, yeah,” he nods, taking in your point of view, “I think it’ll turn out better that way,”

Noah hands you the wet sponge, watching the way your tongue sticks out from your lips as you concentrate. 

“I brought us here because I came to a lot of conclusions during our time apart,” his body frames yours like a puzzle piece, after a while, instead of you taking the lead, you let his hands guide yours now.

“Yeah?,” 

“Pottery teaches us a lot about accepting faults- appreciating the imperfections and flaws that can turn into something beautiful,” he moves your hands to pinch the clay in certain spots and watch your piece come to life. 

“Furthermore, we have patience and persistence- pottery, like relationships, demands patience at every turn. To keep going in the face of difficulties, even if you don’t see the results right away. It takes time to mold something beautiful” 

Noah kept going and you’d be lying if his words weren’t tear jerking. While you two were rekindling, you had some introspective moments of your own. Realizing that there are some things you could have done differently yourself. Especially since finding out about the mental battles he was facing during the last few months of your relationship, which caused him to break it off.

You were so caught up in your own mind that you didn’t realize Noah’s actions were due to the fact that it wasn’t Noah- he pulled back from you because he was trying to figure his own labyrinthine mind out, that’s why he kept asking for time, he just felt ashamed to say it out loud. 

Both of you got time, even if it wasn’t in the most ideal form.

“I’m still learning and growing and I know I have a long way to go for you to fully trust me because of those faults, but I’m patient and I’m not going anywhere,” 

You felt him kiss your shoulder, causing goosebumps to flourish on your skin.

“Well… maybe we won’t need the water bowl to wet the sponge anymore since you’ve got me crying over here!,” 

The laughter that erupts from the two of you is boisterous, providing comedic relief in the midst of him expressing his emotions. 

“You two are doing great over here!!,” the instructor complimented the piece the two of you were crafting.

You felt the swell of pride in your chest because whether she was talking about your pottery piece or not, you and Noah are doing great.

The night progressed beautifully. You had to leave your piece at the place overnight so it could get fired and glazed before you took it home to decorate yourselves. So, Noah took you on a stroll, your hand in his, taking in the view of the pretty lights set up downtown. Finding yourselves in front of the big fountain in the center, you stick your hand out to him

“C’mon, big money. Hand over a quarter,” 

He quickly digs in his pocket and hands you a shiny coin in which you hold up to your mouth, whispering to it before throwing it in the fountain. The light plopping sound it made was satisfying to you.

“What did you wish for?,”

You notice him taking his shoes and socks off, rolling up his pant legs and you feel suspicion rising in your belly.

“That would beat the purpose of a wish!,” 

“Take your shoes off,” 

“No! I know what you’re about to do and I spent too much time on my hair and make up!,”

Noah sat you down on the edge of the fountain, removing your shoes for you

“You know that you don’t need your makeup and hair all done up for me to find you absolutely breathtaking… right?,” 

He gives you no time to reply before he’s standing you up and bringing you into the fountain, twirling you around under the raining streams. 

“Noah we’re gonna get in trouble!!,” squealing in his arms, trying to get out of them. He sets you down but before you can scold him, his wet hands are framing your face to pull you in for the long awaited kiss that he’s been wanting to give you since the day you left. 

You felt like you were in a movie. The hopeless romantic that lived within you was thriving. You were stuck in your spot for a second, realizing that since starting over, this is your first kiss and he made it so damn romantic. Pulling him in by his shirt, your lips follow his, flowing with the same desire and unspoken words.

I’m sorry.

I forgive you.

We’re going to be okay.

I don’t hate you

I love you.

I always will.

Damning your own instinctive need to breathe, you pull away from him, pressing your fingertips to your lips, still completely shocked by it all.

“I’m sorry I just… I couldn’t fight it anymore,” he looked so ethereal, wet hair sticking to his face, droplets on his cheeks and big, brown eyes staring back at you with blown pupils.

“Until the day we are returned to dust to the universe, I will love you and cherish you. I will be what I should have always been. And even then… even after we are just dust- I will find you in another timeline and continue to be that and more”

Life is a beautiful thing now. It was no longer grey and neither of you felt like you were just getting by, you were finally living. 

You didn’t want to give up your cabin, so despite all the memories the house back in the city had, you two decided to make more memories out here.

Your house was full now, filled with friends you missed dearly, all of them soaking up time with Noelle, getting used to being uncles. 

“Nuh uh!,” Noah shouts, “Folio, wash your hands before holding her,” 

“What the hell! I just did!!,” he defended, arms halfway out, ready to reach for his niece.

“Not long enough! Sing happy birthday twice if you have to- and don’t swear around my daughter!,” 

Noah fit the dad role real well. He was proud to be the father of your child. He doted on Noelle, always took pictures with her, sang to her (a lot better than you ever did) and though Noah had a love for the city, he loved being out here with you two, taking her on daily walks around the countryside while you tended to the chickens and garden. 

You thought he’d put up a bigger fight due to his career but- things were simple out here and being out here made him feel normal and domestic. This is what life was always supposed to feel like and it’s what the two of you had always envisioned. 

“Everyone get ready, dinner’s almost finished!,” Ms. Ernie hollered. She loved the guys, it didn't take long for her to warm up to people and just like she took you under her wing, she did the same for them. She even listens to their music now, she says Hedonist is her favorite. 

Folio doesn’t care to make his plate now that he has Noelle, making her squeal and laugh at his silly faces. 

Matt bumps you as he moves past you to get a drink out of your fridge, “I told you he wouldn’t take her from you,” 

“You only get one ‘I told you so’ in our friendship and you used it well. Thanks, Matty,” 

During the time you and Noah were reconnecting, you had to rebuild your friendships with the guys as well. You and Matt now have your farmer’s market dates back. You, Jolly, Davis and Folio have your bowling on Thursday nights while you and Bryan go to the movies every Tuesday because they’re half off. And Nicholas- the one who truly is like a brother, both of you had your chess game that you abandoned but he kept the board set in hopes that one day you’ll come back. 

He taught you how to play ages ago and when you finally got the hang of it, you two matched all the time, some matches going for days, this match being the longest ever due to a hiatus. 

He had the board with him, setting it up on the counter, both of you moving your pieces throughout the day.

“I know how to beat you,” staring at the board, he comes to stand beside you.

“Yeah?,” grinning as if he wasn’t about to lose.

“You have nowhere to go, Nicky,” you pick your Queen up, moving her to h5, threatening his f7. You watch him frown at your movements and you have to hide the smirk on your face. If you win, you’ll no longer be tied. 

You move your Queen to take his f7 and you check his king.

“No!,”

“Checkmate!,” clapping in victory, you jump up and down, “I still got it!!,”

“You got lucky!,” 

Despite him losing, he was always a good sport. He did teach you after all.

After dinner, Reid provided dessert, topped with a delicious honey glaze he made from his bees. Matt started a fire pit outside which left only you, Noah and Noelle in the kitchen as you two arranged to put her down for bed. He had her wrapped up against his chest while you prepared his coffee and your tea.

Noelle cooed against his chest, eyes fluttering and trying to fight sleep.

“I love you,” he searched your face, feeling blessed that he can say the words to you again. Your eyes sparkle in the warm light of the kitchen, feeling blessed to hear those words once again. You’ll never get tired of hearing it, especially because it’s all different now. It’s healthier, happier.

“And I love you,” of course you do- it was muscle memory. 

After lightly clinking your mugs together, your eyes catch sight of the fruit bowl you and Noah made in your pottery class. Your painted hand print on one side, his on the other and Noelle’s in the middle with 4 simple words written across it.

You are my Sunshine.

Stepping closer to him, his arm wrapped around your shoulder, the two of you stood in silence just enjoying each other’s presence. Finding joy in the laughter of your loved ones outside. 

All is well and always will be. Ms. Ernie was right. Sometimes second chances are worth it. 

“Thanks for adding to the sunshine instead of taking it away,”

Noah could hear the relief in your voice that things turned out for the better. He’d never give this up. Home isn’t a place, home is this moment right here and every moment after.

“Until we are dust returned to the universe.”

First and foremost i wanted to thank everyone for their patience while i worked on this!! this story means so much to me and i am grateful for the love i received on part one and hope you all enjoy this part even if it’s a little long!!!

Please be sure to reblog and comment as it helps us writers out a lot!!!

much love!

~Berry 🫐

tags: @dravenskye @babs-96 @tech-depression-inventory @magnificentstrawberryomen @mrscevans @tinyfairies @mxddymay @themorticians-world @rainy-darling @lma1986 @darknightstarryeyes @thisbicc @lilhobgobbler @lovethe-void @cind6547 @flowery-mess @widowsofchaos @abiomens @amelia-acero @collapsedglasshouses @poppy-in-the-woods @rostoken @dkxxm @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @fadingintothegrey @blairboo

[changisworld]

Skz with possessive reader? 🤭 like reader is still a sub but can be veery jealous. Like if she sees a fan flirting with a member she wouldn't let go of that member (did i explain it enough? Idk😭please tell me if i did) and what do you think how would members react?? hihi just my thoughts (its supposed to be smut-) 😭

-🦇

YAMMYYAMMYYAMMY this would be so me i swear

I think leeknow, seungmin & also hyunjin would be SOOOO obsessed with the idea of you being possessive, especially right in front of their face BXBSBSBSB, holding their hand in front of any girl that speaks to them, purposely not laughing at anything the other person says but laughing a moment later if your boyfriend says something even less interesting, purposely kissing his cheek a few too many times knowing lipstick or lipgloss would stain their cheek, just to show they really are yours & yours only.

Would definitely make it up to you as soon as you got home by fucking you into the mattress, teasing you on your behaviour as your eyes are going teary from how good he’s fucking you.

“you like this cock don’t you, hmm? seem to be so jealous of anyone who steps near it”

“made for you, would never dare give it to anyone else, unless that’s what you’re wanting hmm? jealous jealous girl”

“so hot when you’re so protective y’know that? almost wanted to fuck you right there”

on the other hand, i think han, felix & probably changbin would be SO flustered by it!! the way your voice sounds more monotone while talking to the girl who you can swear flirted with them just by breathing too close to them! once you’ve successfully got the girl to get the hint & fuck off, you can feel your boyfriends eyes burning into the side of your face, honestly kinda star struck

of course once you have time for yourselves they’re so so quick to show you how much they love YOU & don’t want anyone else!

“so so pretty, so lucky for you, you look so cute when you’re jealous”

“so protective of me, makes me melt”

definitely buys you or makes you a gift to further show how much YOU mean to them🥲

OKAY so jeongin & bangchan i feel like they would get insanely turned on from it.. because why the hell wouldn’t they when you’re latching yourself onto his arm like a sloth pretty much & pretty much ushering them away from whoever you deemed was flirting or being too nice to them. the thing is though, they probably never catch on at first that you’re jealous & they probably just assume you’re tired or feeling a bit sick or something & they feel so silly when it finally clicks in their head.

they for sure try to tease you by acting even more dumb & asking you outright why you were acting that way, & the second you tell them that you WERE in fact jealous, they know just the way to make it up to you.

“i’m all yours, lemme show you how much i care, hmm?”

“you’re perfect for me & me only, don’t get jealous over anyone because they don’t compare, just look at you”

“if you could feel how good you feel trust me you’d never even want or need to be jealous of anyone else” he groans as he presses his tip past your folds

main masterlist here

->anon list & tag list are open!

@jisungml

[nadvs]

so sorry for sending so many requests but this just popped into my head. in the swte universe, in their college days, i feel like the reader isn't a huge fan of drinking or she doesn't get as pissed as rafe at least. so what if she gets completely drunk one night, being clingy to rafe, maybe people flirt with her because she's without rafe and he comes to "rescue her"? idk just sth like that🤍🤍🤍🤍

never be sorry, ily and your ideas are always so good 🥹 YES omg rafe has no impulse control so he gets hammered on the reg, whereas she’s not one to get too crazy… most of the time 🤭

i’m a sucker for angst so i just had to make it when they’re fwb and he’s already fallen for her while she still just assumes they’re just friends (and this is the night she starts to think of him as something more) 👀

based on this fic

» au masterlist

she cannot pay attention to the guy talking to her. she’s too dazed. she hasn’t eaten much today. she’s running on only a few hours of sleep. and the coolers she drank were so sugary that she didn’t even realize how much alcohol she was consuming. this is the drunkest she’s been in ages.

this guy’s hitting on her. she can tell by the way his eyes trail down her body every so often, his head tilted as he rambles on about something. what was his name again?

she nods along, trying to follow his words while loud music surrounds them. she doesn’t even remember how they started talking.

rafe moved in to this house with his teammates just last weekend and tonight, they’re hosting their first party. the front room is crowded and stuffy and she’s getting dangerously close to feeling sick.

she’d rather hang out with rafe right now. but when she arrived, he pulled her in a friendly hug and pointed her to the drinks, then continued talking to the girl he was already in conversation with.

he’s probably trying to hook up with her and she doesn’t want to be a shitty friend, cockblocking him simply because she’s craving some familiarity.

“…too much work, you know what i mean?” the guy says.

“yeah,” she says, no idea what she just agreed to. she looks around. “did you see any water around here?”

“we can try the kitchen?” he offers.

rafe spots her crossing through the crowd. the guy who she’s been talking to, so obviously into her that he’s embarrassing himself, is following her. she doesn’t seem all that happy that he’s trailing her.

he’s been talking to this girl to try to get out of the fog that sank over him not that long ago. while he was getting ready tonight, all he could think about was the girl who’s supposed to just be his best friend.

she’s always on his mind. when he wakes up. when he goes to bed. during classes. during practice. it’s so bad that even when he’s with her, he’s dreading her leaving.

rafe turns his attention back to the girl talking his ear off. he needs to distract himself. he’s starting to see his best friend as more than a friend, has been for a while now, and it’s fucking agony. she could not be clearer about not wanting a relationship.

and he doesn’t want one, either. he needs to remind himself of that.

but as they round the corner into the kitchen, he sees the guy’s hand rest on the small of her back. it makes rafe’s blood boil.

she opens the fridge. it’s practically empty.

“this has to be a joke,” she mumbles, dizzy at this point.

she swings the door shut and looks up at the guy who’s been following her. at this point, she just wants to get rid of him and find rafe. she can apologize for cockblocking him later.

thankfully, she doesn’t have to. rafe pays no mind to the guy clearly trying to get in her pants, putting himself between them. he ducks, lowering so he can speak in her ear.

“you alright?” rafe asks.

“a house full of athletes and you don’t have any water?” she slurs.

rafe smirks when her hand drags over his. it’s so damn nice when she touches him, especially when it’s subconscious like this. he pulls back just enough to meet her eyes.

then, he turns to the guy who should be able to tell he’s a third wheel at this point.

“we’re good,” rafe says, cocking his head in a way to dismiss him.

irritation flashes over his face. but he’s not moving.

“can you not take a hint?” rafe snips. “she’s not interested.”

rafe isn’t sure if that last part is true, but he hopes it is. it works. he sighs and steps away, pissed off but likely not about to start a fight with the guy known for his aggression.

he turns his attention back to her. he’s revelling in the fact that her hand is still cupping his. her palm is so nice and soft and it’s making his chest go warm.

“how much did you drink?” he asks, the amused smile on his face returning.

“too much,” she admits.

rafe leans over, opening a cupboard to grab a plastic water bottle, then grips her hand tighter.

“come on,” he says. he leads her upstairs to his bedroom, away from the noise and stuffiness of the crowd.

once he shuts the door behind them, the chaos from downstairs muffled, she already feels less overwhelmed.

she’s been in here once before. they hooked up in this bed a few nights ago. she can still remember the way his mouth felt on her neck.

rafe leads her to his bed, sitting her on the edge while he kneels on the floor in front of her, and she’s overwhelmed all over again because of the way he’s looking at her, concern etched into his features.

she’s too drunk. she’s not thinking straight, because not only is she dizzy as hell, but as her eyes sweep over his face, all she can think about is how handsome he is, how good of a kisser he is, how nice it’d be to spend the rest of the night in his arms, like they’re a couple instead of just two people who hook up sometimes.

he twists the cap off the bottle for her. she takes long, slow sips. rafe settles on the bed beside her, watching her.

she lets out a slow breath once she’s drank enough. when she looks at him, she exhales a chuckle.

“why do you look so worried?” she says. “i’m not gonna die.”

rafe catches himself and glances away. this effect she has on him is insane. he’s never cared this much about anybody.

“just didn’t know you were this bad at holding your alcohol,” he says.

“i hate you,” she laughs. “but thanks for saving me.”

“saving you?”

“that guy would not shut up.” rafe hates how happy he is that she didn’t actually like him.

“about what?”

“i couldn’t tell you a single thing he said to me,” she confesses. he chuckles. “i was just thinking that i’m drunk as hell and want to hang out with you.”

that last part slipped out. she takes another sip of water just to have something to do. she expects him to give her shit for her soppy words. but he doesn’t.

“why didn’t you?” he asks.

“didn’t wanna cockblock. that girl you were talking to is pretty.”

she hopes in her drunkenness, she doesn’t sound jealous. because she realizes maybe, deep down, she is.

how could she not be? rafe turned out to be so much more than she expected. what she thought would be a one-time hook-up led her to her best friend. her best friend who happens to be hot and fun and unlike anyone she knows.

“she wouldn’t shut up, either,” rafe says. she laughs, sinking back across his bed.

“are we both just bad listeners?” she asks.

“i’m not.”

“right. you’re never the problem.”

he looks down at her. his cheeks are starting to ache from smiling.

“we should set them up,” she says, her eyelids heavy, legs hanging off the side of his bed. “they’d never run out of things to talk about.”

rafe thinks about how the same could be said for the two of them. conversations always come so easy.

she shuts her eyes and all he can think about is how cute she is. fuck, this is hard.

“what if i napped right now?” she mumbles. “would you be offended as the host of this party?”

“yeah,” he answers simply, because he’s quite honestly at a loss for words right now.

“okay, i’m gonna offend you then,” she says softly. “sorry.”

he nudges her knee.

“don’t sleep like that,” he says. “come on.”

she shifts to lie down on her side, smelling him on his pillow, feeling him put a cover over her. he’s treating her with such tender care that if she wasn’t so drunk, she’d be teasing him, asking who the hell he’s pretending to be, acting all sweet.

but she’s soaking in the feeling because it’s nice to pretend like this is more. she hopes it’s just the alcohol swimming through her that’s making her think this way.

she nuzzles into his pillow. rafe doesn’t say another word. he shuts off the lights and leaves. throughout the night, he comes back up every so often to check on her.

eventually, she wakes up and comes downstairs, feeling more coherent. the music is just worsening the headache she woke up with and she’s desperate to just get home already. she steps outside and books a ride on her phone.

rafe’s phone buzzes in his pocket. it’s a text from her.

thanks for taking care of me. i ordered a ride home and made your bed so i think we’re even

his heart sinks over the fact that she’s already gone.

he replies: we are not even

she texts back: i’m okay with not agreeing on this. goodnight :)

rafe stares at his screen with a small smile on his face, somewhere between happy and sad, before texting back: goodnight.

[moody-alcoholic]

Truth

I am not ignorant to the fact I’m writing a gay sex scene and everyone is hanging out in Syria. Resources below.

Guardians of Equality Movement

Syria LGBTQI+ Resources

Equaldex LGBT rights in Syria

I cant stop writing for this series. Every time I say I'll take a break I pump out another outline...

MDNI +18 content

Summary: Ghoap x Reader, throuple. Slow burn (sorry but not sorry). 2.7k words. Reader is female (she/her), army nurse, non descript physical features, names used: Ashe.

CW: MDNI +18 content Mentions of torture, torture, smut, blowjob (male receiving & giving), language. First proper Johnny x Simon scene, IDK it just felt right...

Previous parts - masterlist - next part

Enjoy <3

Johnny was grabbing something to eat in the canteen when he watched Ghost walked over to him. He knew something was wrong, he had that cold look in his eyes. The one he gets when he has to focus on the job and nothing else matters, not even him. Johnny swallowed hard standing up to meet Ghost. 

“Come.” It’s all he says but it makes the hairs stand up on the back of Johnny’s neck. Johnny follows they walk into an observation room. Johnny gasps when he sees you handcuffed the table head hanging down.

“What happened?” Johnny asked looking round the room his eyes falling on Jack who’s stood there arms crossed. 

“We believe she’s responsible for the murder of the doctor.” Jack says. Johnny laughs, looking around at everyone else being serious.

“Christ, what’s the evidence?” Johnny asked.

“Her ID was used to withdraw large amounts of insulin which is believed to be the cause of death.” Johnny looked at Jack shocked then at Price. 

“Has she said anything?” Johnny asked feeling sick. There is no way you did that, this has to be a set up, something… Johnny just knew it in his gut, you were innocent.

“No, she’s not talking.” Price said, Johnny could hear something in his voice. Sadness? Annoyance?

“I heard you are very good at your job lieutenant,” Jack says taking a step closer to Ghost. 

“‘Pends on what you heard.” Ghost replies remaining still, looking through the one way glass you’ve not moved, not wanting them to see your pained expression.

“I heard you can get people to talk, and we really need her to talk.” Jack says. 

“We can try other ways before sending Ghost in.” Price says. Jack scoffs.

“If she’s been trained by the enemy she won’t break.” He says walking to the door. 

“You have 24 hours to get her to talk or you’re out of here.” Everyone looked at Price. He went to sit down.

“You heard him, make her talk.” Price says.

“We don’t torture innocent people.” Ghost’s voice is level, he still hasn’t moved. 

“We’re not torturing anyone just question her you’ve got to buy me some time, look like you’re doing your jobs so I can figure out a solution.” Price sighs.    

“It’s wrong.” Johnny says. Price sighs again getting up. 

“LT, Gaz go to security I want anything you can find, from the moment she wakes up in the morning to the second she’s asleep. She takes a piss I want to know about it, where her card was swiped who has seen her anything, and quickly before Jack can replace staff.” Price says as he walks over to Johnny. 

“Come on let’s go have a chat with her, maybe she’ll tell us something useful” Price says his hand on Johnny’s shoulder. Johnny knows Price is trying to calm him but there is nothing on the face of the world right not that can slow his mind. He looks back through the window, guilt rises up as Ghost and Gaz leave the room. It’s times like this Johnny envies Simon being able to hide his face. Price squeezes his shoulder he looks in Price’s eyes, they look sad understanding. It doesn't make Johnny feel any better.

—————————— 

You can’t look at Simon’s eyes when he’s the room, the caramel eyes you used to lose yourself in, they’re just dark now, dark and uncaring. Johnny’s in sometimes, he won’t even look at you let alone in your eyes any more, the eyes you used to look in for comfort, love, hope. You don’t know what's worse. Price is the one who questions you, always the same questions. 

How did you do it? 

Why did you do it? 

Who do you work for? 

How long have you known about 141? 

Did you get close to them on purpose? 

Did you use them to get information on 141? 

Why?

He never says their names, Johnny, Simon. It’s always just ‘them’ he doesn’t have to say their names, you know who he means. Maybe you did betray them? Maybe this was all your fault? 

By the second day you can’t remember the doctors name, just the fact he’s leaving a kid and a wife behind. You’re moved into a windowless cell, you’re woken up at random times, you’re starting to lose track of time. It’s only after what you think is the third day it becomes violent. Jack is the only one who’s violent, he’s around a lot more, there are new questions. 

Why this base? 

Why now? 

Do you know anything about the arms sales to Al-qatala? 

Have you ever been to Urzikstan? 

Why kill an innocent doctor? 

Why insulin? 

Why are you betraying 141? 

Why?

Jack is the only one who will look you in the eye, he likes to look you in the eyes but he’s not kind. You become numb to the attacks, the repetitiveness of the torture, you hate that word, torture, it makes you feel guilty. You’re not guilty. Or maybe you are. 

“I wouldn’t use insulin.” You say after a particularly rough session. 

“What’s that?” jack asks, his face up in yours but you can still only just make out his features, nose, lips, chin, in your blurry haze he just looks angry. 

“If I was going to kill him I wouldn’t use insulin, too easy to be traced.” He doesn't like that answer, he doesn’t like anything you say if it’s true or not. 

You enjoy Gaz’s visit’s, he’s the member of 141 you had not met yet, he brings you food, soup or rice mostly. He doesn't question you, doesn't talk to you. Just tries to feed you food, or at least swallow gulps of water that burn your throat. He doesn’t need to do this for you, you don’t know him, he makes you feel strangely guilty. You used to spit out the food not accepting anything from him, when he said they would start tube feeding you, you relented accepting the spoonful's of thick soup or rice and beans. He’s got kind eyes. 

You don’t see Simon or Johnny anymore, maybe they’ve given up on you, maybe they don’t care. Jack tells you they don’t care. Price is there sometimes you think, it’s getting harder to tell, the passage of time becoming almost impossible to follow, you think it’s been 3 days, maybe 4, maybe 5. Your stomach growls, you haven’t seen the sunlight in days. Your body hurts from being upright all the time. 

“You should give her a break.” It’s Simon’s voice that pulls you out of your half conscious state. You see him stood in the door way, all black, his face covered. It’s not the voice you know, not the kind voice you’re used to it’s something different. It makes you shiver, makes the hairs stand up on your body. You try not to cry, only letting tears fall down your face after Gaz has been, then you know you’ll be left alone for a few hours. You don’t want to let them break you but it’s becoming harder to think.    

Someone bursts bursts through the door to the room pinning Jack to the wall. The noise makes you jump and you try to lift your head up but it’s too hard, your neck hurts. You blink hearing shouting, then you feel hands on your face, it feels like Johnny’s hands they’re warm he’s forcing you to look at his face. Everything is blurry you try to squint. You feel movement behind you. 

“I’m so sorry it took us so long love.” It’s Johnny’s voice you’re sure, your head is spinning though, you can’t tell. Your eyes move past Johnny, you think you see Simon, you think that’s him, you feel your head slump in Johnny’s hand as your restraints are cut lose. You must of blacked out for a second because the next thing you know is being on the floor. Johnny scoops you up in his arms and you lean up against his chest. 

“it's over now, we've got you.” Johnny whispers in your ears. You’re blinded by lights as Johnny carries you out to the room to the medbay. You recognise the smell, that’s a good thing you’re not totally broken, you can smell the clean sheets, the smell of antiseptic. There are hands all over you now, people touching you, so many lights. You reach for Johnny, where did he go? You start to panic trying to pull yourself up. Is it a trick? Are they doing this to finally try and break you? 

“Johnny!” You call searching for his hands. You feel a sharp pain travel down your arm. You feel your breath catch in your throat, your body being pressed down. Maybe this is the end you’re in too much pain and too tired to tell. You feel your body slump down as ringing grows louder in your ears, it doesn’t take long before everything goes black. 

——————————   

Johnny wakes to Simon’s hands on his shoulders. He looks over at your body still unconscious, still with tubes shoved down your throat. Simon pulls a chair up next to him, Simon’s started caring less and less who sees them together, especially at night. 

“The doc’s say the swelling in her head’s gone down.” Johnny says leaning forward in his chair.

“When was the last time you slept?” Simon asks him. 

“Got a nice kip before you woke me.” Johnny replies. Simon sighs, his hand running up the back of Johnny’s neck. 

“You really should get some sleep, some proper sleep.” Simon says. Johnny scoffs. 

“4 days,” he says, looking back up at you. 

“4 day’s, we let her suffer.” Johnny says quieter. Simon sighs his forehead resting on Johnny. Simon know’s how guilty Johnny feels, he feels the same too, he’s just better at hiding it. 

“Come.” Simon says getting up extending his hand out for Johnny. Johnny looks up at him blinking. 

“Give me five minutes.” Simon pleads. Johnny sighs standing up and following him. He lets Simon guide him all the way to the dorms into Simon’s room. Johnny has never left the bedside since you had been moved to Damascus. Simon had tried to get some alone time with him but he can tell Johnny’s guilt weighs heavy on his shoulders, he want’s to be there when you wake.

Simon pulls Johnny into his room, locking the door. Johnny tries to protest but Simon is too quick, his hands guiding Johnny’s hips pushing him against the wall. Simon’s hand slips under the front of his mask pulling it off over his head, he looks up at Johnny his thumb stroking his cheek. Simon looks almost sad, he can see the pain in Johnny’s eyes, the anger, he feels it too.

Simon presses his lips onto Johnny, forcing his tongue in his mouth as his hands reach under his shirt. Johnny seems to relax for a second enjoying the taste of Simon on his lips, playing with his tongue. Simon pulls away moving to Johnny’s neck planting little kisses all the way down to his collar bones. His head tips back hitting the wall as Simon pulls Johnny’s shirt over his head. 

“Si, we shouldn’t leave her.” Johnny says as Simon is burying his head into Johnny's neck. 

“She’ll be fine.” Simon says his voice low, almost a groan, as he continues to run his tongue down Johnny’s neck, Johnny’s hands moving up Simon’s back eventually running his fingers through his hair. Johnny doesn’t fight Simon, enjoying the feel of his husbands hands on his body as Simon’s hands slip under Johnny’s waistband pulling his trousers and boxers down. Simon is moving slow, slow and gentle working his hands down Johnny’s stomach to his abdomen, Johnny is almost desperate gripping Simon’s hair as he moves his tongue round Johnny’s body. 

“Si..” Johnny moans as Simon’s hands find their way to Johnny’s semi-hard cock. Simon want’s to almost beg Johnny to relax, instead running his hand up and down his shaft. Johnny presses his forehead on Simon’s chest moaning as he pushes his hands slipping under Simon’s shirt. Johnny trembles as Simon uses both his hands to pleasure him, his breathing becoming faster. Simon keeps Johnny’s body pressed up against the wall as Johnny starts thrusting his hips, fucking Simon’s hands. Johnny had felt this many times before, Simon giving him pleasure, but never quite like this, his emotions high, endorphins pumping through his body, Johnny starts to tense again Simon pulls away, a whimper leaving Johnny’s lips. 

“On the bed.” Simon says guiding him over as Johnny blindly follows his instructions laying flat. Simon takes his boots and the rest of his pants off flinging them to the side. Johnny lays his head back on the pillows as Simon licks the precum off Johnny’s tip making him moan his hands desperately trying to grab Simon’s hair. Simon smiles then thrusts his mouth round his cock taking him all the way to the hilt.

The pleasure is almost overwhelming, Simon can feel it, Johnny’s body shaking a mix of pleasure and stress. Simon doesn't stop his hands running up Johnny’s chest as he positions himself in a more comfortably to suck him off. Johnny moans and gasps as Simon’s tongue presses into the underside of Johnny’s shaft, Simon can feel him twitching in his mouth enjoying each one as he get’s closer to the edge.

Simon can read Johnny’s body like a book, Johnny thinks he’s sly hiding his movements, his cheeky side glances, the heavy petting Johnny does when he’s in the mood, the way his fingers move around Simon’s body forcing his attention. He thinks he’s good at hiding it but Simon knows him, Simon loves him and right now Simon knows he needs to make Johnny relax.

Johnny’s hips are thrusting again Simon’s hands grip his waist trying to keep it in place. Johnny moans Simon’s name as he cums. Simon likes that, hearing Johnny call his name in the heat of the moment, Simon feels his own cock twitching in his pants as he rides Johnny through the orgasm making sure that Johnny is well and truly satisfied before pulling his mouth away. Simon enjoys the taste of Johnny’s cum in his mouth, the feel of his hot seed hitting the back of his throat. Johnny is still panting when Simon moves, sliding up next to him pulling his head on his chest.

Johnny moves to rest on his chest his still heartbeat still racing, Simon takes exaggerated breaths and Johnny subconsciously follows him. Simon reaches down pulling the duvet over Johnny, kissing his face running his fingers through his hair. 

“You need to rest,” Simon says wrapping his arms round Johnny stroking his back. Johnny’s breathing starts to steady as Simon lowers his voice.

“You do this on purpose,” Johnny says sleepily. Simon smiles, he does do it on purpose. Johnny needs to rest, he’s no good to anyone if he can’t think straight.  

“I’ll wake you if anything happens, I promise.” Simon says kissing his forehead.   

——————————   

The knock at the door pulls Johnny out his sleep, he jolts awake almost fighting over Simon to get out of bed. 

“Easy.” Simon says as he moves swinging his legs out so Johnny can get up.

“You said you’d wake me if anything happened.” Johnny sounds frustrated puling his trousers and shirt on. 

“This is the first thing that’s happened.” Johnny throws Simon’s mask at him opening the door before he gets chance to put it on. It’s only Price.

“She’s awake, she’s asking for you.” Price says. Johnny shoves his feet into his boots as Simon gets up off the bed moving over to the door. Johnny looks back at Simon smiling and rushes out the room pushing past Price. Simon follows Price stopping him in the doorway. 

“What do you want to tell her about Jack?” Price asks. Simon sighs. 

“Laswell found anything?” Simon asks walking with Price, he shakes his head. 

“Still looking for a connection, he’ll be punished for the way he questioned her, demoted at the very least, depends on what they feel like. Theres no evidence he spoofed her card we’re lucky there were so many witnesses. We’re lucky we could clear her name so quick.” Price says. It still took 4 days. 

“Think he can justify his actions?” Simon asks. 

“Let’s see, we’ve got other things to focus on now.” Price walks into her room Simon hangs back for a second. A wave of guilt washing over him, he just wanted to hold her jump into bed with her, apologise. 4 days we let her suffer, Johnny’s words replaying in his head. Never again, he promises himself. 

Next part

[wosoamazing]

Sick

Summary: You get sick at training and no one can get a hold of Leah

Warnings: Sick, angst??, IDK

A/N: decided to give you all another fic. I hope you like this one, I don't know how good it is.... also please do send requests in, I want to make sure I'm writing things people will enjoy.

Training today just felt harder than usual, yes you had off days, but something was different, it wasn’t just that you weren’t playing as well, you were hotter, you were running out of breath quicker than usual, you head hurt slightly. Everyone around you noticed but didn’t want to say anything, your teenage hormones were at their peak currently, as Leah put it and you were quick to snap at anyone for no real reason. You stayed quite about it though and just tried to push through, that was until you felt like you were going to pass out and you decided you should probably sit down. So, you went up to Jonas.

“Y/N, how can I help you?”

“Umm, I’m just feeling a little hot, was just wondering if I could sit down for a bit,” “yeah sure why don’t you go inside to the dining room and sit down there, it will be cooler in there than out here, lunch is only 25 or so away anyway,” “Thanks Jonas,” you said, and you turned around, probably a little too fast as everything spun, you stumbled a little and shut your eyes, hoping that no one noticed you continued to make your way into the dining room and sat on one of the chairs, everything was still slightly spinning but it wasn’t too bad. Just as you were about to rest your head on the table you heard footsteps which grew louder, until they stopped, and Katie was standing next to you.

“Hey,” you mumbled.

“Hey, Jonas sent me in here to check on you. You okay?”

“No, I feel like crap” you replied. It was the truth. In an effort to feel better, you shut your eyes and rested your head on the table, it was cool to touch, Katie put her hand on the back of your neck, and she winced at the heat that was radiating off you.

“I think you need to go see a medic.”

“No, I’m fine.” you snapped.

“Okay, well I’ll leave you to it then,” she stood up starting to walk out.

“Katie,” you softly cried out, she looked back at you “can you stay?”

“Only if you let me get a medic to look at you,” she tried compromising.

“Fine.” You sighed. Katie messaged someone on her phone and a few minutes later one of the medics came in. “38.7, not too bad, get her to take two of these and try and see if you can get her sister to take her home, if she is still here in about 45 minutes, we will come check on her again. Also get her to drink the rest of that and another one at least” The medic said to Katie pointing at your water bottle, Katie nodded. “Oh, and have one of these,” Katie screwed her face up at the sight of the emesis bag she really couldn’t handle that type of sick, “look she shouldn’t need it but it’s better to be safe than sorry.” Katie nodded agreeing with that statement. She got you to take two Panadol and to drink some water before you fell asleep. She did wake you every ten minutes to drink some more water however you didn’t really remember that.

“Hey, can you sit up for just a sec,” you look up to see the medic, she takes your temperature and checks your breathing. “39.1” the medic and Katie look at each other you place your head back on the table, and whimper slightly at the movement of your head, however the table felt nice on your head as it was cool.

“Where the fuck is Leah! Why isn’t she answering her phone,” Katie yelled becoming more furious with Leah by the second.

“Why don’t you just take her home?” Kim asked.

“Because Leah is a genius. Who doesn’t give their 16-year-old sister a key? and she refuses to let me take her to mine.” Katie replies

“You could call Sarina,” you decided to chime in.

“What’s her number though?” “Give it here,” you put Sarina’s number into Katies phone, Katie quickly pressed the call button and to her amusement Sarina picked up.

“Hi Sarina, its Katie McCabe, I am really sorry to be calling but we have Y/F/N here and she isn’t feeling well at all, and we have been trying to get a hold of Leah for 45 minutes but she won’t answer, and we understand she is doing important media duties however Y/N does have a temperature of 39.1C, and we think it would be best if she went home.” There was a pause, Sarina must’ve been talking “Okay, thank you so much, so sorry again. Bye”

“She’s coming,” everyone let out a sigh of relief, they hated seeing you so sick and helpless knowing that Leah was the one thing that might make you feel better.

“Leah?” you questioned, starting to cry.

“Yeah, she’s coming, like 10 minutes,” Katie said as she started to rub your back, you placed your head back on the table and continued to cry, you just felt so sick and wanted your sister.

“Hey, I’m here.” Leah said as she rounded the corner, her heart melting at the scene in front of her. You were still crying head on the table, Katie was still rubbing your back looking like she might cry at any moment, she just wanted to help, and she couldn’t.

“Oh, bug.” Leah cooed at the sight, and she continued towards you, you lifted you head up tears still falling. She kneeled down beside you and put her hand on your forehead, she winced and looked at Katie, “39.1 last we checked.”

“Bug, I’m so sorry I didn’t come sooner.” She said, ready to cry herself.

“Can we go home?” you whimpered, as she pulled you in for a hug, she noticed the slight dampness of your skin.

“Let me go talk to the medic first,” she said as she stood up.

“I’ll go get her stuff for you,” Lia said as she went to the locker room. The girls remaining all looked at each other, you couldn’t resist a smirk.

“Why do you have two bags Lia?” your sister questioned.

“Le, don’t do this, I’ve spoken to Jonas, and he agrees that you’re going to need help, come on I’ll drive you home.” She replied.

“Carry me?” you whined looking at your sister who sighed before picking you up and taking you home, the girls all made eyes at each other as the three of you walked out.

_______

“Le, I’m back” Lia said as she walked through the door. “We’re still in here.” Leah replied, she was sitting up against the head board of her bed, you had your head in her lap and your body laid parallel to the headboard, your training top was on the end of the bed and you were just in your crop top and training shorts, Leah had taken your shirt off in hopes of cooling you down, your sweaty body was making the sheets slightly damp, as she rain her fingers through your hair.

“Hey” Lia said softly as she walked into the room, carrying the bag of items she bought to help you. “What you got in there” Leah asked looking at the quite full bag.

“Just the essentials,” Lia pulled out some medicine first, then some hydrolyte, followed by a thermometer “I guessed you didn’t have one of these,” she pulled some more items out “Oh and I got some of these,” Leah’s brow furrowed at the sight of the emesis bags, “they might come in handy one day” Lia said as she shrugged.

“Thank you, Lia for everything not just for today” your sister replied.

“It’s no problem, how is she?”

“I don’t really know, she never gets sick it’s been years, I’m just really worried. Should we check her temperature again?” with of nod of Lia’s head they pulled the thermometer out of its packing and checked your temperature. “Shit,” Lia’s brow furrowed “39.5, what do we do Li, do we take her to the hospital, the doctor?” Leah said heartbroken a tear rolling down her check.

“She hasn’t had any medicine yet has she?” Lia questioned.

“I think they gave her some Panadol at the colony but other than that no”

“Okay well we’ll give her some ibuprofen, and help her take a lukewarm bath, and if her temperature hasn’t gone down or if it goes up after 30 minutes, we can take her to the hospital, how does that sound?” Leah just nodded agreeing with Lia, she just wanted to help you but in this moment she felt helpless. “You give her the medicine and I’ll start the bath”.

“Bug, can you wake up for me?” Leah said softly shaking you. You sat up, leaning against the headboard, resting you head on the wall.

“Here can you take this, it will help you feel better,” Leah said handing you two tablets and your water bottle, you took them and then went to lay back down on Leah, but she stopped you, as the bath was now ready.

“Bug we’re going to put you in the bath for a little while,” you groan at Leah’s words, she helps you up and places you in the bath still clothed. She let you sit there while she went to get the pair of you new clothes, nothing fancy of course, just some PJs. After your bath Leah helped you get changed before carrying you back to the bedroom.

“Oh, you didn’t have to Lia,” she said noticing Lia was just finishing off changing the sheets on the bed.

“Don’t worry about it, it’s all good, here have this” she said as she placed a pillow down for you and Leah. You laid between the two girls with your head resting on Leah’s arm, they rechecked your temperature and it was now back to 39.1, they weren’t super happy with it but happy enough not to take you to the hospital, you spent the next four days in bed sick, Leah and Lia both trying to help you get better.

[nvrsaidiwasinurcloset]

idk if you wanna do this but stepcest smut wth ethan landry and reader??? xx sorry if it’s to much

Hiiii! This is the longest thing I've written so far! I hope you like it, I love to build up a story lmao

Pleaser - Stepbrother!Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader

This contains SMUT - Minors DNI

Part 2, Part 3

Summary: Your stepbrother is getting sick of your innocence facade after seeing the real you.

A/N: I know this won't be everyone's cup of tea, and that's fine. But I've had a few requests like this, so I wanted to write something for the people that are into it. lol, it's 3.6k words, ya girl's been working on this for HOURS.

Your stepbrother is a pain in your ass. Not that you’d admit it out loud though, because your mom thought you were always sweet all the time. You never complained, never acted out, never did anything you shouldn’t.

Ethan saw right through your “Act” as he liked to call it, after running into you at a house party when you’d both graduated. He saw you in the corner, sipping a mixed drink as some loser was trying to get in your pants. He nearly choked on his drink when he saw you go upstairs with the guy, and he immediately felt the jealousy wash over him.

Since then, around your mom and his dad, he’s never made it seem like you were anything other than the narrative you created. When the two of you were alone, though, he loved to do things that made you squirm in your seat. Like the day he was hard as a rock in his grey sweatpants, walking through the kitchen as if nothing was wrong. Or the time he came into your room to ask you a question, wearing only a towel that was hanging lowly on his hips, the water droplets from the shower still on his chest and shoulders. You could never forget the time his hand trailed up your thigh at the dinner table as he was having a normal conversation with his dad, and dirty thoughts ran through your head. After that night, you decided that he needed to sit across from you instead.

He knew you thought he was attractive, and how awful you felt for feeling that way. You’d kind of hoped your mom wouldn’t marry his dad, because you had a crush on him before the night you were introduced to your mom’s new boyfriend and his son. He felt the same way, as he eyed you from across the table that night. Before you knew it, they were engaged, then married.

You had this hot stepbrother move in a few doors down the hall from you, so your innocence act was upped a few notches, hoping that would deter him from trying anything with you. It worked for a while, but after that party, it all went up in flames.

“Hey, sweetheart. Wayne and I want to go on a little weekend trip since we didn’t go on a honeymoon. Do you think you’ll be okay here with Ethan while we’re gone?” Your heart pounded in your chest as your moms’ words as you sat at the dinner table.

“Yeah, I hope you two have fun,” you said, a fake smile plastered on your face to hide how nervous you were.

“I’m sure we can find plenty of things to do,” Ethan said, a smirk playing on his lips. You kicked him under the table, the pained look on his face making you smirk right back at him.

“I’ll leave money for takeout and whatever you guys might need. We’re going to drive up tomorrow night to beat the traffic,” Wayne said, not noticing the interaction.

“Okay, cool. I’ll keep the place clean while you’re gone,” you said to your mom, as Ethan rolled his eyes.

After dinner, you offered to do the dishes so your mom and new stepdad could pack for their trip. With the dishwasher being broken, Wayne volunteered Ethan to help you dry them.

“Do you always have to be such a kiss ass?” he asked, drying a plate and putting it in the cabinet in front of him.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said, as you scrubbed food off another plate.

“You’re always trying to please people, it’s annoying,” he said lowly, as his dad popped in the kitchen to grab his extra phone charger.

You exchanged smiles with Wayne as he grabbed it and walked back out.

“Like that! You always try to make it seem like you’re this innocent person, but I know you’re not,” he said, taking the plate from you.

“I still don’t know what you’re getting at, Ethan.”

His eyes grew wide as he started to get frustrated.

“Quit playing dumb, I know you’re into me, too. I know you think things about me that you shouldn’t. I see right through you, baby.”

You dropped the fork you were washing back down into the sink and grabbed a towel to dry your hands.

“You finish the dishes, asshole.”

Your words were quiet enough for only Ethan to hear you, but they were full of venom. He started to laugh to himself as he stood in front of the sink, finishing the dishes.

Later that night, you were still mad. Ethan was intentionally trying to push your buttons, and if he was going to play dirty, you could too.

When you finished your shower and walked out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel, you heard Ethan walking behind you. You smirked to yourself as you accidentally dropped your phone on the floor in front of you.

You bent over in front of him to pick it up, flashing your exposed pussy to him. He stopped in his tracks as he took in the sight, feeling himself getting hard.

“Oh, I’m so sorry! I didn’t know you were behind me,” you faked embarrassment as Ethan muttered ‘Slut’ and walked around you.

“What was that?” you asked.

He turned and stepped towards you. You were backed against the wall in seconds.

“Don’t start shit you don’t want me to finish,” he whispered in your ear as he towered over you.

Your breath hitched in your throat as your wetness started to reach your upper thighs.

He backed away and smiled sweetly at you. “I’m going to get some water, you need anything?”

You probably should’ve asked for water too, considering how dry your throat instantly got. You shook your head, as you walked into your room.

“Goodnight, sweet dreams,” he said, as you sat down on your bed.

Sexual frustration was coursing through your veins as you sat there. You were almost disappointed that the interaction didn’t go like you’d hoped. You wanted to tease him and go about your night, feeling like you had the upper hand, for once.

The next morning, you decided to go to a friend’s house while your mom and Wayne were at work. You needed to be as far away from Ethan as possible. You didn’t even want to think about him.

“So, how are things with the hot stepbrother? Is he still single?” she asked, the suggestiveness in her voice making you a little jealous. So much for not thinking about him.

“Uh, I don’t know. We don’t talk much,” you said, turning your attention to your phone.

“Well, if your parents are going out of town, maybe I could come over and get to know him,” she smirked, as you rolled your eyes.

“Ethan’s dad isn’t my parent. And we’re not supposed to have people over,” you lied, making her huff.

“Do you always do what your mom asks?”

You started to get mad. First Ethan was giving you shit, now her.

“You’re not coming over to try to fuck Ethan. End of conversation,” you snapped, as she started to get defensive.

“You know, it almost seems like you want to fuck him,” she scoffed out, “Or maybe you already are.”

“This is fucking stupid. I’m going home,” you said, grabbing your stuff.

No, wait. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that,” the tone of her voice was very apologetic, so you turned to face her.

“I’m not having sex with Ethan,” you sighed, “I just don’t want to talk about this.”

“Okay. You want to go to the mall or something?” she said, changing the subject.

“Yeah, I need to get new bras anyway.”

She got up and grabbed her keys, heading out the door with you.

After you made it to Victoria’s Secret, she convinced you to get matching sets of everything you bought, just in case you ever needed it.

“I highly doubt I will need it,” you laughed, as you put the sets in your basket.

“Yeah, right. I know you like to play up the whole ‘I don’t have sex’ thing, but you’re so full of shit,” she said, grabbing a few things for herself off the rack. “I know of at least 3 guys you hooked up with last year.”

“Okay, fuck you,” you said, playfully nudging her into the panty table.

“Ooh these are cute!” she said, holding a pair up. “You need these!”

You rolled your eyes as you added them to the basket. “I need to get the fuck out of here. This graduation money is supposed to be used towards college stuff.”

She started to laugh, “Yeah, well if you get dick in college then I think you’re still using it for the right reasons.”

After heading out of the mall and making it back to the car, you saw a text from your mom.

Mom: Where are you? Dinner starts in an hour, and I’d like to see you before you leave.

You: Sorry, heading home now.

“Hey, I need you to take me home. Mom just texted me,” you said, your anxiety creeping up. As soon as they left, you’d be alone with Ethan.

“That’s cool. We’ll be there in ten.”

When she dropped you off, you hurried to get inside. You set the bag and your purse down on the floor next to the door and went to the kitchen to help your mom with dinner.

“Hey, mom,” you said, giving her a side hug as she stood in front of the stove.

“Hey honey, did you have fun today?”

“Yeah, did you have fun?” Ethan asked from the doorway, holding up the bag that contained all the things you’d just bought.

You mouthed a ‘What the fuck’ to him, before responding. “Yeah, I just got some new stuff for school. I’ll be right back.”

You snatched the bag out of Ethan’s hand and took it to your room before your mom had a chance to see it.

“Who are you planning to wear all that stuff for?” he smirked. It was starting to get annoying.

“Not you,” you snapped, brushing past him and heading back towards the kitchen.

As you sat at the dinner table across from Ethan, you felt his eyes on you the entire time.

“I grabbed some groceries on the way home, so you two should be fine. I transferred some money to your account in case you don’t feel like cooking,” Your mom said to you, “Of course, make sure you use some of it for Ethan, too.”

“Of course, mom.” You smiled, “When are you guys heading out?”

“After dinner, as long as you two wouldn’t mind helping us again with the dishes tonight,” Wayne said, looking over to Ethan.

“We’d love to,” he said, his fake excitement over the dishes evident to everyone at the table.

“No need to be sarcastic,” his dad said, “I hope she keeps you in line while we’re gone.”

Ethan started to smile as he watched you.

“I think I’ll have to keep her in line.”

You tried to kick him under the table again, but he moved his leg before you could.

“I doubt that,” your mom said, taking her plate to the sink.          

After dinner, Ethan took his place beside you as you washed the dishes, and he dried them. There was a strong tension there. Part of you wanted to slap him, part of you wanted to fuck him right there.

“Are you going to take this? Or do I have to hold it all night?” you asked, trying to hand him a wet plate.

“They haven’t left yet, you should probably try to keep your act up until they do,” he said, taking the plate from you.

“What the fuck is your problem?” you huffed, trying to keep busy with the dishes.

“My problem is that you were trying to make me hard last night, knowing we couldn’t do anything about it,” he said lowly, not wanting anyone else to hear what he was saying to you.

“You’re the one that’s been making me wet the last few months. I have no sympathy for last night,” you said, handing him another plate. “You haven’t had any sympathy for anything you’ve done. Always smirking and shit whenever you do something that turns me on.”

“So I make you wet?” he asked, his eyes on you.

“Fuck off, Ethan,” you whispered.

“Are you wet right now?” he asked, pressing you further to hear your answer.

“My mom and your dad are still here. Stop,” you said through gritted teeth.

“Answer the question, baby,” he whispered, when you mom walked in.

“Hey, we’re heading out now. It’s a three-hour drive, but I’ll text you when we get there,” she said, as Wayne walked up beside her.

“You two be safe. Be sure to set the alarm, and don’t forget to water the plants,” he said, before they both made their way through the house and out the door.

As soon as Ethan heard the car pull out of the driveway, he took the glass you were washing out of your hand and set it back in the sink.

“I think you still need to answer my question. Are you wet right now?”

“Fuck, yes Ethan! Is that what you wanted to hear?” you yelled, finally snapping at the situation.

He walked away from you and flopped down on the couch, turning on the tv. You followed him, glaring at him as he sat there.

“I don’t understand you,” you said, as he turned his attention to you.

“What do you mean?” he asked, trying to sound as innocent as you do.

“Oh wait, what was it that you said? Don’t start things you don’t want me to finish?” you asked, walking over towards him. “Well, I think you’ve started something.”

You crawled onto him, straddling his lap as he sat there. His brown eyes looked into yours as he waited for you to make another move.

You head leaned towards his as his hands went to your hips. When your lips touched, it quickly escalated. Your mouths moved together, only stopping to pull your shirt over your head. You started to grind against him, feeling his hard cock pressing against your ass.

“Imagine if your mom saw you like this. Her perfect, innocent daughter, trying to fuck me,” he said, placing kisses along your neck. You whimpered at the feeling as his teeth started to graze the sensitive flesh.

“Can we go to my room?” you asked, desperate for a little relief. Your core was throbbing, and your attempts at giving your clit the friction it needed wasn’t enough.

“Mhm,” he said, standing up as you stayed on him. Your legs wrapped around his waist as he carried you down the hall.

He pressed your back up against the door as he started to kiss you again, the angle of your hips making it easier to grind his erection against your pussy.

“Stop teasing me,” you said, his face inches from yours. You were both breathing heavy, both so needy.

“You want me to fuck you?” he asked, looking over your face as you nodded. “I need to hear you say it.”

“Please fuck me,” you whispered.

He carried you over to the bed laying you back as he quickly got you out of your jeans. He dropped to his knees as your legs hung off the side of the bed, his large hands spreading them apart. He leaned in and started to eat you out over your panties, the material drenched in both your arousal and his saliva.

“Oh fuck,” you mewled, as your hands went to his hair.

He pushed your panties to the side, lapping at your dripping entrance. Your bottom lip was in between your teeth as his tongue started to move up, giving you clit some attention. You looked down to see his eyes connected with yours as you sat up on your elbows.

“Does that feel good, baby?” he asked, sliding two fingers inside of you.

You gasped as his fingers stretched you out, both of them bending to give attention to your g-spot.

His mouth attached back to your clit, his tongue gliding across it as he inched you closer to your orgasm.

It only took a few minutes as you started to feel your dripping pussy clinching around his fingers.

“Oh fuck, Ethan,” you moaned out. Your eyes screwed shut as your mouth fell open.

“That’s it, baby. Cum for me,” he said, coaxing you as your hips started to jolt. “Just like that.”

His mouth gently licked your clit until you started to come back down from your high.

“I don’t think I’ve ever came that hard,” you said, as he stood up.

“That’s because you fuck losers at house parties,” he said, sliding your panties down your legs. “You could’ve had me making you cum like that the whole time.”

“Yeah, like you even noticed me at school before our parents met,” you said, a hint of sadness in your voice.

“That’s not true. I thought you were beautiful, but you were just so sweet. I didn’t want to hurt you,” he said, reaching behind you to unhook your bra. “It was too late once I saw who you really were.”

His mouth went to one of your nipples, sucking it in his mouth as his hand went to your other breast. He made sure to give each one equal attention as you started to whine underneath him.

“Do you have any condoms?” he asked, “If you don’t, I do.”

“Yeah, they’re in a box under my bed,” you said, as he smirked at you.

“Did you hide them there so your mom wouldn’t find them?” he asked, reaching under the bed and grabbing the box.

“Yeah, she still thinks I’m a virgin,” you said, sitting up as he stood against the side of the bed.

You reached over to unbuckle his belt and unbutton his pants, desperate to get him out of them. You pulled his jeans and boxers halfway down his thighs as his hard cock stood at attention right in front of your face. You felt your mouth start to water as you leaned closer to take him into your mouth.

“Oh fuck,” he groaned, as you took him as far in your mouth as you could. His hand went to your hair to hold it out of your face as you moved your head back and forth, your spit dripping down his cock. Your hand reached up to stroke what you couldn’t fit in your mouth, twisting your hand a little.

“Okay, if you want me to fuck you, you have to stop,” he said, laughing. “Who knew your mouth was good for more than the fake niceness that comes out of it.”

You rolled your eyes as you laid back, his hand reaching in the box to grab the foil-wrapped protection.

“Hurry up,” you whined, watching him take his time.

“You almost made me cum a minute ago. I don’t want to bust as soon as I get inside of you,” he said, rolling the condom on. “Be patient, baby. We have the whole weekend to do this.”

He took a couple minutes to give more attention to your nipples, before his mouth met with yours as he slowly slid inside of you. You moaned into the kiss as he stilled inside of you, giving you time to adjust to his size.

His mouth didn’t leave yours, the two of you making out as he started to move his hips. You were both moaning and groaning into each other’s mouths, releasing the sexual frustration that started to build months before.

He pulled away to watch your face as his fingers trailed down your neck, over your collar bone, all the way down to your throbbing clit.

“Oh shit,” you babbled, the feeling of his two fingers rubbing against you as he fucked into you making it hard to form words.

He pulled your legs up over his shoulders, making it easier for him to hit that special spot inside of you. The spot that was making your vision get fuzzy every time the tip of his cock hit it.

“I-fuck..gonna cum,” you finally got out, as your legs started to shake against him. He loved watching you as the wave of euphoria washed over you. The way your nipples got even harder, the way your eyebrows furrowed together, the way you got goosebumps.

As he watched, he felt on the edge of his own orgasm. “God this pussy is so perfect. You’re gonna make me cum.”

It only took a few more pumps into your fluttering walls for his hips to stutter, groaning out as he released into the condom.

“That was…amazing,” you said, your voice showing how tired and fucked out you were.

“You want to go to bed, babe?” he asked, as he took off the condom and put his boxers back on.

“Can you sleep in here with me? you asked, as he shook his head.

“No, I think that would be crossing the line.”

You started to laugh, “So what just happened didn’t cross any lines?”

“You’ve got a point,” he said, crawling in your bed beside you. “I really think you should consider wearing some of that stuff you bought today for me, just saying.”

[mintsturniolo]

oh baby... pt. 1 (m.s)

bf!matt sturniolo x f!reader x bsf!nick sturniolo

a/n: okay so i'm getting bored of writing fluff. can someone give me some angst or smut ideas please 😭 anyways i'm actively working on requests. i also have never gone to an ultrasound so... yeah idk what happens or doesn't happen there.

summary: hailey finds out she's pregnant and is scared about how matt is going to react

Matt was worried about his girlfriend. She’d been acting different lately and no one could figure out why. While it was no surprise that Hailey had a sensitive stomach, the most random things had been making her sick recently. He was currently waiting for Hailey to come out of their room, which she’d been hiding in for the past thirty minutes now. Matt and Nick looked up as the bedroom door opened and Hailey emerged from the room. She looked stressed as she looked at the two of them. “Nick, can we talk?” she asked running her fingers through her hair.

Noticing the confused look on Matt’s face, Hailey went over and gently planted a kiss on his lips. Matt smiled and took her hand. “Are you okay? I’m worried.”

“I’m fine, Matty” Hailey replied as Matt kissed her back. “I’ll be back in a little bit.”

Hailey led Nick to the bathroom and turned when she saw him hesitate. “Nicky please. I need to show you something.”

Nick glanced down the hall before following Hailey into the bathroom. He closed the door behind him and raised an eyebrow. “Well? What’s going on?”

Hailey took a breath as she motioned towards the sink. Nick looked over and his eyes widened when he saw an unopened box of pregnancy tests on the counter. “Oh my God,” he whispered. “What? Hailey!”

“I’m freaking out Nick. Matt and I agree we weren’t ready. I’m scared how he’s going to react,” Hailey panicked. “I just have a feeling I am. Everything’s been off and it explains all my symptoms.”

Nick took a deep breath, knowing that freaking out wasn’t going to help his friend. “Okay. Take one right now. I’ll be in the living room. Call me when you’re done.”

Hailey nodded, too nervous to reply. She watched as Nick left the room, closing the door behind him. Hand shaking, she opened the box and pulled out one of the tests. She followed the instructions on the box and set the timer. After the longest few minutes of her life, Hailey looked at the test. She immediately felt like the wind had been knocked out of her. It was positive. She didn’t realize how long she had been staring at it until Nick knocked on the door. “Hailey? Are you okay?”

“Come in here,” Hailey stuttered.

Nick walked into the bathroom and frowned when he saw the fear in Hailey’s eyes. “Girl-” he started.

“It’s positive,” Hailey interrupted. “I’m going to take another one to be sure, but this one’s positive.”

“Okay,” Nick said, his tone slightly excited, but mostly nervous.

“Can you get Matt please,” Hailey requested.

Nick left the room and a couple moments later, Matt walked into the bathroom. He wrapped his arms around Hailey’s waist and planted a kiss on her cheek. “Are you okay? What were you and Nick talking about?”

Hailey reached past Matt and picked up the pregnancy test. Matt’s eyes widened when he saw it. He examined the results before looking at Hailey for confirmation. “That means it’s positive?” he asked, excitement creeping into his voice.

Hailey nodded, searching her boyfriend’s eyes to see if he was mad. “I’m going to be a dad?” Matt asked, clearly still processing the information.

“I need to take a second test to be sure, but yeah,” Hailey replied as Matt hugged her tighter. “Are you mad? I know we weren’t planning this…”

“I’m not mad. Are you kidding? I just learned that I’m going to be a dad with one of the most amazing girls in my life. I’m shocked but so happy,” Matt said, leaning in for a kiss. “Who else knows?”

“Just Nick. I told him to keep it quiet til we were ready to say anything,” Hailey replied as tears started to run down her cheeks. “I’m so glad you’re not mad.”

Matt gently wiped the tears off Hailey's face as he looked into her eyes.

*8 weeks later*

Matt and Hailey were still in shock that they were going to have a baby. They had announced it to Chris who immediately started referring to himself as uncle Chris. All of the boys had been even more protective of Hailey if that were possible. Matt couldn’t believe that he was currently driving Hailey to her first ultrasound. He parked and they made their way into the building. Hailey’s name was called and she could feel the excitement building. She was about to see her baby for the first time. She let out an excited squeal and grinned up at Matt. “Are you ready?”

“I’ve never been more ready for anything in my life,” Matt replied as he squeezed Hailey’s hand.

Hailey had never seen Matt so attentive. He was incredibly focused as the doctor explained everything that would occur at this appointment, never once letting go of Hailey’s hand. The lady finished setting up the equipment and began to apply the gel onto Hailey’s stomach. After a few moments the doctor smiled. “Okay If you look right here, that’s your baby.”

Hailey couldn’t stop looking at the screen in front of her. Their baby was so small. Tears filled her eyes as she turned to look at Matt. “Look Matty, that’s our baby.”

“I know,” Matt said, smiling more than Hailey had seen in a long time.

When the appointment was over, Matt led Hailey out the door. It was quiet as the two of them processed everything. The ride home was full of anticipation. Hailey was eager to show Nick and Chris the ultrasound photo they had. When they pulled into the driveway, Matt went to the other side of the car to let Hailey out. He leaned down and kissed her for what felt like the millionth time today. He gently placed a hand on Hailey’s stomach, just as the front door opened. “Well are you guys coming inside or not?” Chris asked eagerly.

Matt laughed as he let go of Hailey. “Yeah. We got something to show you.”

Taglist

@adirtylittleheart @sturniolo04 @yourenogoodforme

[leejihoonownsmyheart]

Something He Likes (M) pt. 2

The second part to the eighth and final part of the Pathetic series

Summary: Jeonghan and y/n are finally together. But what does being together mean for them?

This part is 31k which was too much for tumblr???? Because it was over 1000 blocks??? So it's split into two parts being released at the same time IM SORRY. Alexa play Hate Rodrigo by Yena

Warnings: Dubcon as always, let’s do this one more time: dom!jeonghan, sub!y/n, masochist!jeonghan, sadist!yn, lots of public play and I mean a lot okay, Jeonghan is a tease, degradation, dacryphilia, creampies, slight teeny tiny breeding kink if you squint at one part, pet play??? Like it’s not but he calls her a bitch and makes her bark idk what you want me to call that, cunnilingus, fingering, rough sex, mean!jeonghan, references to y/n being a toy and other demeaning things in a sexual manner (but like at this point we all know this right), praise!kink if you squint, the l-bombs in this one are crazy, jealousy from both sides, possessiveness from both sides, unprotected sex as always, bimbification? (yn is fucked dumb)

-

This is part TWO of the eighth part of the pathetic series make sure you read this before you read what is below:

-

He was too cruel during dinner, you didn’t even try to pretend like you were interested in the conversation. You knew you looked sick to his classmate. You didn’t even remember the classmate's name. You barely touched your food. Jeonghan messed relentlessly with the vibrations (albeit when you squeezed his thighs and mumbled a soft please, he gave you a good fifteen-minute break before resuming the edging).

His classmate ended the dinner early out of concern for you. Jeonghan put on a show of looking concerned when his classmate mentioned how red you were. He touched the back of his hand to your forehead.

“Are you okay baby? You should have told me you weren’t feeling well.”

Before finally, you two were free.

When you got back to your apartment with Jeonghan, your fingers were clutching so hard at his wrist that you thought it was going to leave bruises. Your cheeks were bright red and the toy was still buzzing away inside of you at it’s lowest setting that still felt like it was going to make you explode at any second.

All you wanted to do was get inside, get this dumb toy out of you and finally be rewarded for having been so good all day. You were desperate. You needed this. And so when you finally fumbled your front door open and Jeongyeon and Jimin were standing in the living room you wanted to cry.

“Y/n!” Jeongyeon exclaimed excitedly. You gave her a tired smile.

“Jeongyeon!” You said back, trying to match her enthusiasm but failing miserably. Jeonghan nodded his greeting towards Jeongyeon and Jimin.

“Are you feeling okay?” Jeongyeon asked, her excitement turning to concern the moment that she got a good look at you. You nodded.

“I’m just… Tired. Long day,” you replied. It wasn’t in any way shape or form a lie, but you knew that Jeongyeon could tell there was more to it. You gave her a look.

“Well,” she said, turning to Jimin. “We were just going out, but we should all go on a double date soon.”

She wiggled her eyebrows excitedly and you nodded.

“Yeah, that would be fun,” you agreed, extremely relieved to hear that Jimin and Jeongyeon were leaving. The idea that they would be there all night would have made you crazy.

You thought that you all said more to each other. Were vaguely aware of Jeonghan and Jimiin exchanging some words but before you could really register any of it, the two were locking the door behind them.

You let the tears that you had been holding back freely run down your cheeks as you turned all your attention to Jeonghan.

“Please, please, please,” you begged emptily. “I can’t do it anymore Jeonghan, I’ve been so good. I n-need so badly- I-I- need you so badly.”

Jeonghan didn’t look like he really felt bad for you. Instead he cooed at you lightly.

“Are you sorry baby?” He asked you lightly. “Do you understand what being bad gets you?”

You honestly didn’t even remember why you were being punished today. You didn’t really care.

“I’m s-sorry, won’t do it again I p-promise,” you assured. Your skin was burning. “Please Jeonghan fuck me. Please really fuck me. I need you so badly. I-I need to come s-so badly.”

“I know you do,” Jeonghan replied softly. He scooped your cheeks in his hands and pressed a light kiss to your lips. “You did so perfectly for me, you know that?”

You nodded, but it was just kind of automatic. Jeonghan lowered his hands to the hem of your skirt and then turned you around, bending your body over the back of the couch. He pulled off your panties which were damp from the little bit of cum that had dripped out of your pussy around your toy. He tugged at the toy so that it was almost completely out of you and then, pushed it back in. You let out a wrecked sob.

“Pl-Please I c-can’t-“

Jeonghan cooed sympathetically and pulled the toy from out of you, causing his cum to drip down your tighs. He pressed a few fingers into you experimentally.

“You know, I really like you like this,” he said softly. “So wet, and stretched out from being used all day.”

The phrasing made your whole body arch. God why wouldn’t he just shut up and fuck you already?

Just as you were thinking that, you heard Jeonghan unzipping his pants, and then you could feel his fat tip teasing your hole. When finally Jeonghan slid his cock into you, you felt like you could cry in relief.

Okay, you did cry in relief. Your wrists were grabbed practically instantly as Jeonghan began to fuck into you, his thrusts quick and desperate. He hadn’t bothered to take his jeans off, a clear indication that he felt bad about teasing you so much all day.

You could feel the denim brushing against you with each thrust, and each thrust was so hard it had your whole body shaking. You could tell that Jeonghan was desperate for an orgasm too. The sadist in him loving the sounds of your moans mixed with sobs so much that it wasn’t long before he had tugged you up by one arm, his fingers fiddling with your clit-

“You can come, you’ve been such a good girl for me.”

You came immediately and as soon as your orgasm racked through you Jeonghan was coming too, spilling cum deep inside of you. His thrusts came to a stop as you fell limp against the couch, your heavy pants filling the living room.

Jeonghan pulled away from you and stood back, probably watching as his cum dribbled out of you. You let him stand there for a little while, but not long. You whined, loudly, garnering his attention back to you.

“I’m sorry,” he said softly. He came up behind you, pulling your body so that you were flat against him. “Let’s get you washed up.”

You didn’t protest as he showered you. Mostly because you were too tired to, and you didn’t feel truly relaxed until you two were lying in your bed, Jeonghan’s arms wrapped around your body, holding you close to him.

“Are you really okay?” He asked for what felt like the millionth time. “Sometimes it worries me that you never safe word-“ His voice was light. He knew that you would safe word if you really needed to. “You were very good for me. Don’t think anyone knew all day that I was playing with my little toy.”

He turned you around in his arms and you drearily pried your eyes open to look at him. A small smile on your lips.

“Felt good,” you whispered back. “Feels good to be good for you. Like being able to do whatever you want me to.”

“Would you do it again?” Jeonghan asked. You let your eyes flutter shut.

“Not as long,” you murmured. “Shorter.”

“Okay,” he whispered. You heard him shuffling closer to you, one of his hands coming to your hair. He brushed his fingers lightly through your strands but the attention made you whine. You turned onto your back, but he was still able to mess with your hair at that angle.

Your shoulder brushed against Jeonghan’s your chest rising and falling as you fought, still, to catch your breath. You could feel him moving closer to you, felt his fingers brushing against yours, and the feeling had your mind buzzing despite how exhausted you were.

Your eyes fluttered closed, and you tried to focus less on Jeonghan and more on your breathing. When you finally thought that you were calm. Normal. You opened your eyes and Jeonghan was staring at you with an odd expression on his face.

“Let’s break up.”

You stared at him, unsure of what to say. You hated how even now he was so difficult to read. His eyes were staring at you, wide with so many emotions that you couldn’t pinpoint in them. You couldn’t help the frown that pressed itself across your face.

“Really?” You finally said, after what was probably minutes of silence.

Jeonghan’s eyebrows furrowed a bit at your reaction.

“Yes.”

You stared at him. Again, his expression was unwavering and you should feel worried but for some reason you weren’t.

“No.”

Jeonghan hummed.

“So what? You’re just going to make me keep dating you? For however long you want to?”

His voice was serious, and yet… You could almost swear that you heard a jesting tone in it.

“I guess,” you replied pointedly. Jeonghan chuckled and rolled over to meet your gaze.

“I love you, y/n,” he mumbled. “What do you think… You love me yet?”

Your face reddened at the topic of conversation but before you could reply at all Jeonghan was tapping you on your cheek lightly.

“I’m just teasing you,” he said softly. He shrugged. “I just wanted to see how you were feeling about this relationship I guess.”

Your eyebrows furrowed.

“You were teasing me?” You blurted. “About breaking up?”

Jeonghan laughed as if that wasn’t a bit psychotic.

“Well, now I kind of want to,” you replied, but the smile on your lips was very telling at the fact that you were joking. Jeonghan hummed, and tugged you closer to him.

“And what would you do then? Would you go date someone else?”

“Oh yeah. I think that Minhyuk would love to go on a date with me. And he probably wouldn’t tease me about breaking up.”

Jeonghan made a disgruntled noise at the mention of someone who actually wanted to go on a date with you, and he pressed the palm of his hand to your face.

“What happened to the y/n who was sleepy?” He asked you. You laughed a little, but the darkness that the palm of his hand brought you reminded your body that you really were absolutely exhausted.

“I guess for now you still have a girlfriend,” you murmured. You turned on your side, burying your face into Jeonghan’s chest.

“Trust me y/n, I would never dare to let someone as perfect as you slip away.”

-

It was getting to that point where waking up without Jeonghan around was weird.

You had always worried about getting into that type of relationship with someone.

Where waking up without them was more painful than anything else in that moment.

You pushed down the feeling- As far down as you could get it- And went about your morning as you usually did. You showered, got dressed. There was a slight deviation to your morning. A small good morning text that made you pause, and brought a smile to your face.

“Oh I know that look,” Jeongyeon teased, brushing past you, with a small poke to your side. You rolled your eyes at her, typing a quick good morning back before joining her in the kitchen.

“How’s school been going lover girl.”

“Don’t call me that,” you mumbled. “I’m such a bad girlfriend it’s ridiculous.”

Jeongyeon’s laugh was light, but sympathetic.

“Come on, that’s not true.”

You waved off the conversation topic.

“How are you and Jimin?” You asked.

Jeongyeon hummed.

“Going,” she replied. She rolled her eyes slightly. “We had our first big fight. But I like how we resolved it.”

The thought of fighting with Jeonghan sent a shiver through your body. You couldn’t imagine him being mad at you. You wonder what he would do. You knew how he punished you when he wasn’t mad at you. When it didn’t matter.

But then again, you weren’t always great at reading his emotions. Maybe he had been mad at you before but you just hadn’t noticed.

You thought about it again for a few seconds.

No. He was too frustratingly patient and understanding towards you. There was no way that you had angered him so early on. At least you had that going for you.

“I’m glad you two resolved it well.”

You lazily rested your cheek on the palm of your hand as you watched Jeongyeon fall into the routine of making the two of you eggs for breakfast. Watching her cook reminded you of Mingyu and his cooking. It had been a while since you stayed the night at Alpha Mu.

Without really thinking over it too much you pulled out your phone and sent Jeonghan a text.

Can I stay over tonight?

Jeonghan’s response was immediate.

You miss me?

You rolled your eyes.

I miss Mingyu’s cooking.

Jeonghan didn’t reply but you knew that the answer was a resounding yes.

Jeongyeon set a plate of food down in front of you, to which you smiled at her and thanked her.

“I think that I’m going to be staying at Jeonghan’s place tonight,” you said. Jeongyeon hummed.

“I’ll probably have Jimin over then.”

You two fell into a soft conversation after that, catching up on what you two had been up to and how class had been going. You and Jeongyeon didn’t spend as much time together now, and you almost never seemed to be home at the same times but that didn’t mean you two didn’t hang out at all. You two still caught lunch together. There were moments on the weekend. And every morning that you were both home you two had breakfast.

And that being said, your days had changed a bit too. You texted Jeonghan quite a bit during the day, given that he was a bit clingy. He always wanted to know what you were doing, and how class was going, and if you were studying with Yeongtae and if he could come join you.

It was always a phone call where you sounded like a mother chiding their toddler: You’ll see me in a few hours. Just wait until then.

And then of course the minute you came over, in front of the others, he was always so quiet. Acted as if he could care less if you were there or not.

-

Your eyebrows furrowed as you squinted at the paper in front of you, unsure of really what you could add to make this round out a bit better.

“Maybe we should add more examples,” your partner Zen suggested. You hummed at the suggestion.

“You don’t think we have too many?” You murmured. “I mean how many popular examples of bipolar disorder can we really add?”

Zen groaned at the question, letting his head drop onto the table.

“I don’t know,” he insisted. “I’m not a psychology major like you. How else are we supposed to fluff up this paper? We are just short of eight pages.”

You gnawed on your bottom lip in thought. How were you two going to add more to this paper? You were about to propose something when suddenly you felt a hand on the back of your neck, a thumb pushing at your chin to turn your head.

Your eyes were still focused on your paper as you were dragged into a kiss, and you only turned your attention fully to your boyfriend when his other hand came to your cheek, forcing your full attention to the kiss. Your face was burning red when you were finally released from the kiss, and your eyes flickered up to meet Jeonghan’s smug smile.

“Really?” You asked him, your eyes flickering over to Zen who, to his credit, was pretending to be focused on the paper again and not the full-out pornographic makeout session that he had practically had to watch. Jeonghan pouted.

“What? I missed my girlfriend. Can’t I greet you the way that I want to?”

You didn’t miss the way that his voice raised a little at my girlfriend.

You tried to control the burning of your face as Jeonghan pulled out a chair next to you.

“I thought you were going to wait outside for me,” you mumbled softly. Jeonghan sighed, his fingers tapping against the table.

“You’re late,” he replied. A quick glance at the time and you saw that he was right. How had you and Zen gone twenty minutes over what you to had originally planned. “And I won’t be distracting. I’ll just sit here.”

You looked up at Zen who was now openly watching you two closely. You could see the pain in his eyes but you knew that it stemmed from the fact that twenty minutes over meant that you two had been at this for over twenty minutes now, and the paper was due in two days.

“I wasn’t made for these kind of working conditions,” Zen insisted. “Mental disorders and their impact on societal interactions was supposed to be an easy credit.”

“Why didn’t you just take a different creative elective,” you admonished him. “Like a writing class.”

Zen’s expression turned deadly serious.

“You want me to take a class where they tell me how to write?” He asked, as if it was the most abdominal thing he had ever heard. “Writing classes are so stupid because writers don’t know how to grade based on the way you write. Like all writers write differently, but they want you to write just like them for a semester. No. Thank you.”

Zen yanked the computer over to him and his eyes scanned what you two had written.

“And yet here I am. Writing for a psychology elective.”

“Let’s focus more on the impact that it had on the people around them,” you suggested. “We talked about Carrie Fisher let’s talk about how fans took it, or if it made it harder for people to work with her on set.”

Zen’s mouth dropped into an ‘o’ and he scooted closer to you so that he could scroll back to that section of the paper. As he did Jeonghan’s hand fell onto your thigh, his head coming to a rest on your shoulder.

“My smart girl,” he mumbled softly. The praise sent warmth through you but you tried your best to ignore him.

“Add right there,” you said softly, pointing to a spot on the paper. Zen obediently added some space to the document and then immediately went to go find an article you two could read on the topic. As you two were reading, Jeonghan was getting progressively more bored. He shifted his head back and forth on your shoulder until you raised a hand to his hair and began to soothingly rub circles into his scalp.

That only sated him for about five minutes. Then he decided that he had been waiting for you for too long. His hand crept further up your thigh, and his thumb began to rub lazy circles around your clit through your underwear. You shivered under his touch, both grateful and regretting the easy access that your skirt allowed him.

“Are there any interesting words in your paper?” Jeonghan asked you, clearly asking if you needed to safe word. You pressed your lips together and shook your head.

“No words of interest. I’ll let you know if I think of one you would like,” you murmured back. He hummed back in response. Pleased.

You all fell into silence as you and Zen focused back in on your work, Jeonghan finding pleasure in playing with your clit while you two added to your paper. The teasing was thrilling, of course. You loved it when Jeonghan played with you. Especially like this. In a way that wasn’t overtly obvious in public. In a way that was easy to keep down. And you loved the way it made you feel like you were just something he could play with whenever he wanted to.

Jeonghan sunk a finger into you and you had to momentarily bite down on your bottom lip to keep yourself from making any noise.

“Do you think this sentence sounds okay?” Zen asked you softly. You forced yourself to focus on what he had just typed and then nodded.

“Yeah, that’s perfect,” you agreed softly. You two were almost done with the paper. You had hit your page goal now. All you had to do was add a little bit to finish off the thoughts you two had added and you were done. Zen had already offered to edit it before turning it in tonight since he had a lot more writing experience than you did.

You spoke out some sentences that you wanted Zen to add, surprised by how even your voice stayed. Jeonghan didn’t go easy on you as you spoke. Instead he seemed to have gotten bored of how well you were hiding the way that you were soaking his fingers. He pressed three fingers into you and his lazy pace that you accossiated with sheer boredom was replaced by something more deliberate. He curled his fingers inside of you, trying to get a rise out of you. You ignored him, but then just as you went to speak again Jeonghan had smashed his finger into your clit, forcing a gasp out of you. Zen gave you a concerned look which you waved off.

“Embarrassed by all the pda,” you said lightly. Zen seemed to take that but Jeonghan hadn’t eased up during the interaction. He pumped his fingers in and out of you fast, clearly trying (and succeeding thus far) to drag you to an orgasm. You mentally fought against it, trying to hold back but you knew that if you weren’t careful your fingers digging into your palms would give away what Jeonghan was doing.

Then Zen’s elbow accidentally brushed your warm skin and you very quickly, quietly murmured your safe word. Jeonghan’s fingers immediately stopped inside of you, and he pulled his fingers, very carefully out of you.

Your breathing turned easy as Jeonghan cleaned his fingers off and gave you a soft kiss to the corner of your lips.

“You’re so good for me,” he said softly. “Sorry baby.”

Relief flooded your body at his reaction to the scenario. It was a whole different thing to know that Jeonghan would listen to you if you safe worded and to experience him listening to you when you safe worded.

The whole thing made your body burn hotter, your fingers returning to thread calmly through Jeonghan’s hair. In that moment you felt so grateful for him. You turned your head back towards him, and just gave him a look, begging him silently to kiss you. Being in public be damned.

He pressed a very soft kiss to your lips.

“Again,” you whispered. He did as you wished.

“… Again.”

A small smile and he kissed you again.

“You’re so greedy,” he said softly. “But I’ll spoil you tonight. Don’t worry.”

Jeonghan shoved you against the wall, as soon as you two were alone in thebathroom. You were only a bit embarrassed to say that you and Jeonghan had fucked more than once in this bathroom. And only a little more embarrassed to admit that you would be doing it more.

You whined as Jeonghan fisted the collar of your shirt in his hand, and hiked up your leg so that he could push aside your underwear and push a few fingers into you.

“Love it when you’re already nice and ready for me,” he mumbled. “It’s like you’re made for me like this.”

He unzipped his pants, pulling his hard cock out of his pants.

“You want me?”

Your eyes flickered down to his cock, and if you were completely honest it was like you were drolling staring at it. You wanted so badly for him to use your mouth, but you knew that all he wanted right now was to be buried inside of you.

You got a slap across the face for staring at his cock too long.

“Stupid slut,” he chided, and you would honestly never get tired of being called that. “Can’t have my cock if you can’t tell me that you want it.”

“Jeonghan please,” you begged lightly. “I w-want it so badly. Need you to fuck me. You know how badly I want it. Would have let you take me on the table in front of Zen if it hadn’t-”

 Before you could finish speaking Jeonghan had slammed his palm over your mouth.

“Shut up, I just wanted consent,” he mumbled his voice gruff. With his other hand he guided his cock into you and wasted no time easing himself in. Once he knew his tip was in he was pushing himself all the way inside of you with one swift movement. You let out scream mixed in a moan at how suddenly he pushed himself into you and your eyes fluttered shut in relief.

Jeonghan let out a pleased groan of relief, and for a moment he just let his forehead fall against yours, enjoying the feeling of being buried inside of you. After a few minutes you couldn’t stand it anymore. You whined against the hand that was still keeping you quiet.

Jeonghan sighed.

“Such a greedy little whore.”

He kept his hand over your mouth because you’re always too loud in public. You don’t want to be caught do you?

And began to fuck you hard. Each thrust had your back bumping the wall, but at this angle it felt like he was splitting you open and fuck it if you didn’t love that feeling. Jeonghan was sloppy, obviously letting out his frustration at having to share your attention earlier and… So much recently. You could tell he was tired of all the different partners you had been having for classes.

“You’re so good for me,” Jeonghan praised, little whispers in your ear. “Just taking everything I give you like a good girl. Always so good. ‘m so proud of you, you know that?”

Your face was burning, the praise pushing you closer to an orgasm than his cock was. You raised your hands to Jeonghan’s wrists, squeezing at him just for purchase.

“I’m proud of you for safe wording,” he mumbled. “But I’m also proud of you for just taking my fingers before that. Letting me play with you like my own little toy.”

His hand slipped off of your mouth, replaced by his lips. He didn’t really kiss you, just let you pant and moan and cry against his lips.

“Didn’t even know you knew your safe word,” he teased lightly, his voice still soft. One of his hands came to your hips, and he pressed you hard into the wall, his thrusts becoming more erratic.

“Just never want to sue it,” you mumbled back, knowing he wasn’t begging you for an explanation. Jeonghan’s breath began to come more frequently.

“Gonna fill you up so full,” he mumbled. “Make you drip cum down your legs the whole way back tonight.”

Before you could respond, he was devouring your lips in a breath stealing kiss, and immediately after that you could feel his cock spraying hot cum inside of you. You cried against his lips as he lowered one of his hands to your pussy, his fingers rubbing your clit until your whole body was shaking with him.

He came down from his orgasm faster than you did. He stopped his thrusts, and slowly slipped out of you, letting his cum rush out of your pussy and soak your panties. He let your leg drop back down but with one hand he kept you pressed against the wall and with his other hand he kept you trapped in a deep kiss until your shaking had stopped.

He broke the kiss, pressing his sweaty forehead to yours.

“I love you,” he promised you softly, and the look in his eyes was so serious that you had to look away from him.

“Need a minute,” you mumbled softly. “N-need to sit down.”

Jeonghan nodded and helped you slide down the wall, burying your face in his chest in exhaustion. He murmured soft reassurances to you until you told him to shut up because it was turning you back on and you didn’t think you could take another creampie in the library bathroom.

But regardless. You were enjoying this, all of this.. Even if Jeonghan’s secrets were getting to you.

It started with the lactose intolerance. And it just few from there. Finding out from Mingyu that Jeonghan didn’t like this vegetable or finding out from Seokmin that Jeonghan hated this author. They were all things that when they came up and you didn’t know it you just… Felt bad.

You should know these things. Why wouldn’t he just tell you these things. He knew them about you. He woke up early and bought you coffee in the morning, and he bought you little things that made him think about you- like a little yellow duck statue for your bookshelf that you just couldn’t figure out the significance of.

Your biggest focus at this point in your relationship was to just… Not think about it too much. To just remember what everyone kept insisting to you. You would figure it all out eventually.

Jeonghan rolled over on the bed.

“Y/n, can you come with me tomorrow?” Jeonghan asked. You glanced at him, the hesitation clear in your eyes, but only there considering the last time that he had asked you that question.

You didn’t think you could endure a whole day of edging in public again.

Jeonghan waved away your silent concerns.

“It’s just that Jia is going to be in town and she wanted to get lunch,” Jeonghan replied. You waited for him to tell you who Jia was. “No shenanigans this time, just a lunch.” 

You supposed there wasn’t going to be an explanation. Just another guessing game on who Jia was the whole time that the three of you ate together.

“Sure, that sounds lie fun,” you said with a slight smile. Jeonghan hummed, happy, and turned your head to his, tiltingnup your chin with his index finger. A soft kiss was pressed to your lips.

“Thank you. I love you,” he whispered softly. “Good night.”

You sighed and buried your face in his chest.

“Good night.”

-

You really liked to sleep in on Sunday’s. It was the only day that you really got to yourself after all, but regardless when Jeonghan woke you up at nine in the morning to get ready gou were more than happy to oblige.

And your drowsiness practically flew out the window when Jeonghan insisted you shower together and pushed you against the wall ignoring the way your hands slipped on the shower wall tile.

“You gonna be good and take it quietly?”

He had to let you suck on his fingers while he fucked you against the wall to keep your moans down to a minimum.

Jeonghan took you to a small cafe off campus that you had never heard of. He didn’t supply you with any information about this Jia. No prepping of how long he had known her or anything of the sort.

Just a car ride with your spotify blend playing in the background.

You weren’t sure what to think really. As you walked in, your shoulder brushing his when abruptly a girl from the center of the homely cafe.

“Hannie!!”

She exclaimed, causing more than a few students in the cafe to look up in surprise. A warm smile crossed Jeonghan’s lips as the girl came rushing through the tables, colliding with him in a tight hug.

You pressed your lips together uncertainly as she jumped excitedly while hugging him. Jeonghan found it really amusing which was… Odd… Normally Jeonghan kept the touches with other people down, but he was encouraging it. He placed a hand on her head, patting her dark hair.

“Jia,” he said pleasantly, before his expression turned a little sterner. “What have I told you about not causing such a large scene places?”

Her smile turned apologetic but it was then that she noticed you. Confusion crossed her face.

“Oh, Hannie, who’s this?”

She didn’t know you were coming?

You tried to make your discomfort as unclear as you possibly could. You smiled and introduced yourself while Jeonghan just stood there and watched you two with a look you didn’t recognize in his eyes. He was up to something you could feel it in your bones, you just weren’t sure what he was up to.

“It’s nice to meet you!” Jia exclaimed. “I’m Jia but of course, I’m sure Jeonghan has told you all about me.”

She radiated certainty and her smile was so wide and pure that you just couldn’t tell her anything that was contrary to what she seemed to believe.

“He does,” you agreed lightly. “I was really hoping I would get to meet you.”

Jia gasped, that huge smile still on her lips. She pointed at you.

“You’re a liar,” she exclaimed with a laugh. “Jeonghan doesn’t talk about other people people. It’s been hell even learning about his frat brothers.”

She giggled again, covering her mouth with the back of her hand.

“But I have heard about you y/n.”

There was a mischievous look in her eyes that almost matched Jeonghan’s. You weren’t sure what to say, so you just laughed again.

“Hopefully all good things.”

You were surprised when Jia reached forward and patted your cheek affectionately. 

“Jia,” Jeonghan said, using a tone that you were only used to hearing when you had done something that he deemed to be bratty. You had never heard him use it on anyone rlse before.

Jia pulled her hand back, her brows furrowed and her lips downturned.

“You’ve always been so possessive of the things you like,” she mumbled. She looked back over at you. “He’s been like this since we were kids. Always yelled at me for being friends with his ‘other’ friends.”

“We spent enough time together as it was,” Jeonghan said with a roll of his eyes. It made Jia pout.

“It’s like you don’t even like me,” she said.

Jeonghan let out a heavy sigh.

“You know I love you Jia,” he said, but he sounded like it was a chore to say. Jia beamed.

“And I love you Jeonghan.”

A twinge of jealousy shot through your body, but you pushed it down, reminding yourself that being jealous because she was comfortable saying I love you to him and you weren’t was stupid. 

But as the lunch went on, the stupid feeling didn’t go away. Not because of her really but because of how they interacted. It was so clear to you that they knew each other really well.

Better than he knew any of his classmates, better then he knew any of the Alpha Mu boys.

“Did Jeonghan ever tell you the story about when we went out drinking for my 21st?” Jia asked, leaning forward on the table. You shook your head politely.

“Well, little Hannie used to drink like crazy,” Jia said with a large smile. “And my best friend at the time… Uh, what was her name?”

Jeonghan seemed disgruntled by the conversation.

“It was Vivia,” he provided regardless.

“Yes! Vivia!” Jia looked back at you. “Vivia was obsessed with Jeonghan. She wanted him so badly it was ridiculous. Vivia and I were friendsd with mutual friends so she showed but and spent the whole night getting Jeonghan drunk.”

Another giggle from Jia.

“He was so focused on me that he was really paying attention to how much he was drinking, so at the end of the night he was so wasted I had to take him to his place and he just had the biggest break down. We don’t spend any time together anymore. Times have changed so much.”

Jia laughed, but again the conversation was clearly annoying Jeonghan. You bumped his shoulder and tugged his hand down under the table so that you could intertwine your fingers.

“Have you ever seen Jeonghan cry?”

You shook your head, but the thought was a little amusing if it were because he was drunk.

“Jia, you act like you’ve never done something embarrassing before,” Jeonghan grumbled.

“No,” Jia denied. “I just know that y/n doesn’t want to hear my embarrassing stories. She wants to hear the ones about you.”

You didn’t deny it and Jeonghan sent you a warning look over your silence.

“Well…” You trailed off. “It’s not exactly untrue.”

You liked hearing stories about how Jeonghan was a quiet kid in elementary school who had practically no friends. Or how he actually did have a crush on this girl in middle school but she made fun of him for his long hair so that was the first time that he cut it short.

“I like the length that it is right now,” you said. “I think your hair would look good really long or really short.”

As you spoke you raised your free hand to mess with a strand of his hair. His facial expression softened under the attention.

“You think so?”

“You wouldn’t think so if you saw this picture of him from when it was longer.”

The longer the three of you spoke the more comfortable you got around Jia. But the longer the three of you spoke the more that uncomfortable feeling brewed in the pit of your stomach. That thing that had been gnawing at you for so long now that you should be immune to it.

“I have to go to the bathroom,” Jia announced. “But Hannie, I really want another Chai.”

She pushed two clasped hands forward on the table, giving Jeonghan a wide eyed expression with a small pout on her lips. Jeonghan sighed and rolled his eyes.

“Do you know how much money you owe me?”

“Thank you!” Jia exclaimed excitedly. She hopped up from the table.

“Which one do you want?” Jeonghan tried to ask her, but as she ran away she just exclaimed.

“You know me! Just surprise me.”

Once she had disappeared behind the bathroom door Jeonghan sighed, and gave you a weary look.

“Thank you for coming with me today,” he said. “I love Jia but…”

You didn’t really hear the end of the sentence. I love Jia. You just never really heard him say that about anyone but you.

“Do you want anything?” Jeonghan asked, not noticing the words that you were clinging to. Not knowing the feeling in your gut that was destroying you. The pressure that was building in your brain.

“No,” you replied, but even so when Jeonghan got up to go order the Chai for Jia you followed. You stayed right behind him, your fingers tugging at the back of his shirt. You were quiet while he ordered, but the second that you two were standing at the counter waiting for it to be prepared and he made a: “Well you know about me and Chai.” That you just couldn’t keep your thoughts to yourself.

“Jeonghan I know nothing about you,” you blurted out. Jeonghan’s eyebrows furrowed and he glanced over at you.

“Huh?”

“I know nothing about you and everyone else does,” you blurted. “It’s like everyone we meet has all this history with you. Jiheon, Kibum, Cheol. When I first met you it was like you didn’t have any friends but that’s not even true. You’re close to everyone except for me.”

You looked away from him, embarrassed that your true feelings were coming out but not embarrassed enough to get you to shut up.

“I don’t know how you like your coffee. I don’t know your favorite foods. Your favorite color. What am I supposed to do when your birthday comes around? All I know is that you like legos, what kind of girlfriend would I be if I just got you legos for your birthdays.”

Jeonghan was surprisingly calm.

“Y/n, I love legos.”

“But for your birthday? Everyone would judge me. Everyone judges me. I am the worlds worst girlfriend. Why are you dating me? Why don’t you date someone like Jiheon-“ His face said it all when you said that. “I’m just saying. She knows you. I don’t know you, what could I possibly-”

“Architecture.”

You stopped speaking, your mouth dropping a little bit.

“Sorry?”

“Architecture,” Jeonghan replied pointedly. “I’m an architecture major.”

Your mind raced to process the information but before you could Jeonghan was speaking again.

“And not that many people know everything about me,” he denied. “You’re overthinking it.”

You pointed blindly towards the room that you and Jeonghan had left Jia in.

“What about Jia?”

“Y/n-” A laugh erupted from him. “Jia is my sister.”

Shame rushed through your body faster than you had ever imagined it possibly could.

“You…” There was so much to take from this. “You have a sister?! I really don’t know anything about you.”

Jeonghan placed both of his hands on your shoulders, and gave you a very serious expression.

“Y/n, why are you still so worried about this?” He asked softly. “Do you still think that you’re not good enough for me? Really? After all this time?”

You were silent, because yes you did still think that. Even after all this time.

“I can’t tell you I love you,” you said, your voice very quiet. “Jeonghan, I can’t tell you I love you when I don’t know these things about you. I can’t tell you I love you when there are so many people that would be better for you.”

“But you do love me,” Jeonghan replied. Your frown deepened at his words.

“You don’t know that.”

“Yes, I do,” Jeonghan denied. “Do you really think that there’s any world where I don’t know how much you love me?”

You were quiet.

“I don’t think I could have gotten so lucky, to be with someone like you. Someone who cares so much about me, someone who wants so badly to be good for me that you would selfishly hold back three words that you desperately want to say all because of your insecurities.”

He sighed, and raised a hand to your cheek, his thumb swiping across your cheekbone.

 You felt so embarrassed to be under such a gaze but it was comforting nonetheless.

“Your biggest problem in this relationship is that you think you have to say all these things for me to know. You could never tell me that you loved me and I would still know.”

You were a little reassured but not that reassured.

“But I still don’t know you,” you said quietly.

“You don’t know my favorite color, and you didn’t know my major but it was mostly just because I was messing with you. Keeping those things from you cause I thought it was cute the way that you tried to figure things out.”

There was a small smile on his lips.

You were dating a psycho.

“You know me. You can tell when something is off. You can tell when I need reassuring. You know me. And that’s what matters, y/n.”

You sighed. You felt stupid. How could you have been so stressed for so long about such small things that didn’t matter at all. You had been so obsessed with figuring out what his major was, that you hadn’t even paid attention to the ways that you were being good at this whole relationship thing.

“Jeonghan,” you mumbled softly. “I love you.”

A smile tugged at Jeonghan’s lips, one that was so pure and genuine that it made you want to say those three words again, and again, and again, but you held back.

“I love you too,” Jeonghan replied softly. “More than you know.”

You rolled your eyes at the sentiment. More than you know. As if everyone didn’t know how much Jeonghan was in love with you.

“A ruby chai for Jeonghan.”

Jeonghan sighed, as if he was just now remembering where you two were. He gave your cheek a small pat and then wandered back over to the counter, thanking the barista as he picked up the drink for Jia. He tipped the cup at you.

“Do you like Jia?” He asked you. You nodded, but your face was a dark red.

In a café. You two were in a public café right now. And you had just told him that you loved him for the first time.

“She reminds me of you in a few ways,” you admitted, and you two made your way back to the table you were sharing with Jia. “I thought it was just because you had been friends since child hood but it makes sense now. I can see the resemblance in your eyes.”

“I’m sorry I do things like this to you so much,” Jeonghan said after a few moments. “I tease you a lot.”

“A lot is an understatement,” you mumbled. “But I don’t mind it. It’s how you tell me that you love me.”

Jeonghan’s smile tugged harder at his lips and you could tell that he wanted to say more but before he could Jia was joining the two of you at the table again, and you two were dragged right back into conversation with her.

-

“Okay, okay, how do I look?”

You stared at Yeongtae with a borderline bored expression.

“You look the same as you always do,” you said pointedly. His lips dropped into a frown.

“Y/n, it’s your first-time meeting Chaeryeong as my girlfriend I just want to make sure that I look good for the occasion.���

The pout in his tone was funny. A smile flickered across your face.

“You look fine,” you assured.

Now that finals were finally over you were excited to spend the summer with Jeonghan. Sure he had his internship and you had your job but you two had already planned to go on a day trip to some mountains to do some hiking, so you had a fun and eventful summer ahead of you.

He had proposed this. A party with all of your friends. All of the Alpha Mu boys, the Jiheon friend group, and even your friends.

You thought it was odd but he promised you that there was no alterior motive to the party.

“Just one last hurrah before the summer,” Jeonghan had promised. At first you thought it was strange, but the more you thought about it the more you understood. Jeonghan was sentimental and this school year he had gotten exactly what he wanted. Exactly what he had been wanting for years.

You.

When you and Yeongtae made it to the party it was mostly just catching up with people. You couldn’t really find Jeonghan, but Yeongtae was dragging you from place to place regardless. You two spoke with your friends and caught up over how exams went.

Yeongtae had become pretty close with Jiheon’s group of friends and he pretty quickly found his brand new way-too-hot for him girlfriend and settled in with that group.

You had to catch up with Seungcheol and Soonyoung for a while before finally you found yourself catching sight of Jeonghan. You sighed and stopped moving in the middle of the crowd of people. Jeonghan caught sight of you and his lips quirked up into a smile.

He slowly made his way over to you, and leaned down, giving you the smallest, sweetest kiss he had ever given you.

“What’s wrong baby? Not excited to see me?”

You just stared at him, a pout still on your lips. He sighed and pulled you up close to him, burying your face in his chest.

“What? You don’t want to spend time with our friends?”

You shook your head into his chest. You were glad he had thought of this. You thought it was nice of him to try so hard to merge your two’s worlds. Even Jeongyeon and Jimin were having a good time.

“You want me to take you upstairs and fuck you like the good little toy you are.”

Your face burned with embarrassment but you peaked up at him regardless, a smile on your lips as you gave him a small nod.

“Jeonghan, I really do love you.”

He smiled at you, and you could already see the excitement of what he was going to do to you upstairs strumming through him.

“I love you too.”

fin~

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for posting pics of myself with scars visible?

Tw for self harm

This happened years ago when all of us were in the 16-17 age range. We’re now 19-20

I have scars all over my body. Most were years old by that time, but some were still in the pink stage. Unless I want them showing, I need to wear long sleeves and long pants. This is what I usually do because I hate people asking questions or staring or the idea of someone thinking differently of me. However being so covered up is not practical in the summer months, especially as it gets closer to 90° temps. So, when I’m out with friends I sometimes go out with short sleeves or shorts. My friends are fantastic about this and don’t make me feel weird for how my skin looks.

We took a group pic and it was super cute so I posted it. The only ppl who follow me are my friends and they all know that I have scars. I’m trying to accept my body and everything and it’s a little step in that direction so I posted as is. No edits or anything. Usually I would cover with emojis but I feel like that draws attention to it rather than hides it. Especially when the emojis strategically cover both arms or both legs lol. Editing them out feels weird too. Like I would kill to have no scars but having them edited out of pics just feels disingenuous to myself?? Idk But anyways I thought it was fine to post, like it’s not the focal point of the pic. Its just three girls in front of a building and one happens to have scars.

Alice (fake name) messaged me about the pic warning me that my scars are showing. I thought she was trying to be nice. Warning me in case I wasn’t aware and wanted them covered. I said “I know haha but thanks for looking out for me” and she said something like with “I know you’re trying to be proud of your scars but not everyone is okay with seeing that ” that hurt, but I know she didn’t intend that so I explained to her that I didn’t know anyone in our group would feel that way, and I posted that bc I’m trying to feel normal. Not proud, just like a normal person posting a cute pic with friends. She basically told me it’s one thing to wear clothes that show them but another thing to post online. like what if someone sees it and takes up self harm or what if I trigger someone or what if employers see and other stuff, I can’t remember it all. She ended saying I should’ve put a TW in the first slide at least. I feel like that draws even MORE attention to my scars than the emojis and makes me very uncomfortable.

I haven’t posted pics with my scars exposed since but I wanted to know was I really TA for posting that pic? WIBTA if I posted one without the TW on the first slide? I’m just sick of cropping and covering it makes me feel so weird to the point I rarely post.