#nami and quake

[sketchwizard]

deep shame of calling your boss "mom"

[mothwizard]

I need to finish this doodle of the OSHA absols but i don't have my inking pens. so for now just look at them with me :)

[servingrobin]

oooo what about yandere zoro who’s with someone who can actually match his freak ☝🏽

oooo what about yandere zoro who’s with someone who can actually match his freak

Omg yes!!! Zoro is one my faves for Yandere because he is generally so stoic and cool, this is brilliant

WARNING DARK THEMES!!!

Warnings: smut, dark themes, threats of violence, mutual obsessiveness, sword/knife play, creampie/breeding kink, bondage, dub-con

✨ requests are open ✨

- Zoro was wary at first, the way you pulled on his heart and dick was strange and made him extremely uncomfortable

- But as time went on he grew obsessed: the way you fought, the way you dressed, your mannerisms, your body, everything drew him in

- And he just had to have you. But there was a beast inside Zoro he’d never known before - not only did he have to have you, he could be the only one, no one else should so much as look at your perfection

- You responded extremely well to his advances, agreeing to his date ideas, making great conversation, letting Zoro take you to bed after a few weeks, it was perfect

- Until that damned cook started flirting with you. Nami was away for the weekend shopping so all of his attentions shifted to you and Robin, and Zoro was ready to violently kill the man

- But for the sake of his crew and Luffy he decided to ensure you’d stay with him instead

- You woke up in the night with your wrists above your head, spreadeagled on your bed. A quick glance showed thick black ropes tying you down, knotted in extremely proficient bows

- Zoro sat at the foot of the bed, his three swords splayed out at his hip. He ran soft hands up and down your legs and hummed softly when he saw you were awake.

- “Zoro? Baby what’s going on?”

- “I can’t stand the way he looks at you Princess, I need you to understand you’re mine. No one else’s. They can never have you. “

- He grew more heated as he spoke and with the speed of a bullet unsheathed two of his swords, bringing them to rest gently against your neck in a cross

- You gasped as the cool metal grazed your skin, deadly afraid but a weird fire building in your belly. You were completely vulnerable in this state (and naked to boot), but you adored it

- You looked up at your boyfriend with wide eyes and he glared back down at you.

- With one hand holding a blade strict to your throat, the other lowered and got to work removing his trousers enough for his hard cock to spring free, bouncing against his abdomen.

- You tried to squeeze your thighs together and Zoro noticed immediately, smirking as he lowered himself to nestle his mouth against the shell of your ear

- “You. Are. Mine. You understand?” He whispered threateningly, “Of course you do, you’re dripping for me already.”

- Zoro was delighted by the way your body reacted to him, enjoying that he would not have to hurt you (not that he had actually planned to - he didn’t think anyway)

- You whimpered and bucked your hips upwards, desperate for friction

- Zoro groaned and lined up to your entrance, head poking at your folds but not entering

- “Tell me what you want Y/N - tell the truth who do you belong to?”

- You moan out and try not to jostle against the smooth metal still pressed against your neck

- “You Zoro, you own me, need you so bad, want you to fuck me Zoro, all yours.”

- The words came out in pants, eyes glazing over as the heat in your belly bubbled and quaked at the pressure of the man above you

- Zoro chuffed out a breath and sank into you to the hilt, stretching your walls impossibly wide

- You winced at the discomfort from the lack of preparation, but the pain only enhanced the pulsing heat inside you

- Zoro thrust into you roughly, throwing his swords to the side in order to grip you tighter

- His hands around your hips, dragging you into his cock with each thrust towards you

- He set a bruising pace bouncing you up and down, you barely holding on for the ride. You could feel your wrists burning from the friction of the rope and tried to hold tight, knowing they’d be ringed blue in the morning

- Zoro fucked you for what felt like hours, smacking and your tits and ass as he rammed into you

- You babbled ceaselessly, moans of “yours” and “please” and “so good”

- Zoro joined in your chanting, chasing his release

- “Such a good little slut for me, taking my cock so well Y/N, a perfect whore for your boyfriend and no one else.”

- He grunted as he got faster and faster, rhythm becoming sloppy as Zoro chased his high

- You clenched around him, shouting out as you squirted a storm up both yours and his stomach, juices flowing across the bedsheets

- Your eyes were perfectly glazed over and tears formed in the creases, picture perfect to Zoro above you

- “That’s it baby girl cry for me, so dumb on my cock you can’t even think. Don’t worry you don’t need to think anymore, just take this cock like a good girl. “

- He grew extremely close to his release and held the grip of his sword to your mouth, indicating what he wanted you to do

- You took the hilt between your teeth like you’d seen him do so many times, and sobbed as you came again, wetness now a puddle beneath you

- Zoro let out a grunt and started spurting his seed, bottoming out with great ramming jolts of his hips

- “That’s it Princess, milk my cock, take it all. Making you a momma would keep you here forever huh? Taking my seed so well you obviously want it.”

- You are numb at this point and can only nod, feeling Zoro’s cum squish around his cock and down your thighs

- With a sigh he slips out of you and lazily undoes the ropes keeping you spread

- You shiver and curl into his side, sword forgotten next to you

- Zoro kisses your forehead and hums you to sleep softly, holding you tight in his arms

- You took that better than he thought you would, and he didn’t even have to threaten any limb removal, which he counted as a big plus

[firefirefruit]

Steel in Her Veins, Chapter: Twenty-Eight

Read On: AO3 | Table of Contents | Next Chapter

Characters: Fem!Reader x Roronoa Zoro

Chapter Twenty-Eight: Sugar and Spice and Everything… Sooty

Raya races all the way up the ladder, her breath staggering in her lungs like a hellhound set on a bedevilled chase. She leans against the door, lips parting for the sharp and successive breaths to leave her system, her arms firmly curling over the heavy crate of alcohol she’s managed to swipe from the kitchen.

A heavy quake stammers across the surface of the crate, vibrations pulsing through the glass bottles like a fissure ready to spill. Almost unwillingly, she cranes her neck downwards to the mysterious assault, and when she realises the source of the ruckus, her lips fold into a heavy grimace.

Across the surface of the box lies the shattered remnants of Kikoku, humming and shuddering in such a startlingly low pitch, that its voice could raise devil spawn to grace human land.

Fuck, she hisses to herself. What has she gotten herself into?

Through the brown strands of her windswept hair, her eyes pierce down at Roronoa who reluctantly grabs the ladder by his firm hands as he heaves himself forward.

This is all his fault, she thinks to herself - a thought she finds herself repeating more and more often as a source of respite.

“I don’t get what you want me to do,” he grumbles out, a tied bottle of sake dangling from in between his teeth. His feet smoothly trace along the next ledge of the ladder. “I don’t know how to make swords. I don’t know how to -”

“Don’t try to weasel your way out of this, Roronoa. You’re guarding me,” Raya instantly replies, leaning over the high ledge of the crow’s nest. Her eyes briefly scan through the crowd of pirates, impatient fingers fumbling over the bannister like a worried mother.

“Guard?” Zoro immediately bursts into a scoff. He climbs the last ledge with one effortless leap, his boots creaking against the wooden panels of the floor. “You’re actually being serious?”

Raya doesn’t look at him - instead, she squints her eyes even harder, trying to filter through the mass of drunken moving bodies. “Look – he’s there.”

You subtly nudge your head downwards to a certain narrow-eyed pirate’s direction. Thankfully, after begging for Nami’s help to keep him distracted, it seems like he’s actually starting to loosen up. You notice there’s a beer curled within his inked fingers, and every so often he lifts that same bottle up to his lips, liquid pouring into his mouth with a sharp swig.

Into a smiling mouth, to be precise.

Raya gapes at him a little, and despite the hellish circumstance she’s in, a little grin appears on her lips as she takes in his countenance.

He’s actually been smiling for more than two seconds so far – isn’t that some sort of new record for Law or what? Raya thinks to herself.

"Look, he's all tipsy right now," she explains, turning back to face Zoro with a frown reserved only for the likes of him. "But we both know he'll snap out of it soon enough. And when he does, he's going to climb all the way up here and beat both our asses up. You're here to make sure he doesn't catch us off guard."

Zoro stares at her, clearly unimpressed with his designated role. "So, I'm the one who has to deal with his whining while you get to…?"

Raya stares back at him, clearly unimpressed with his reaction. “Roronoa, I’m fixing the goddamn sword you fell on. You guarding me sounds like a walk in the park compared to what I have to do.”

And for a moment, they’re locked in a silent staring contest.

Raya's eyes are narrowed in determination, her gaze like twin laser beams boring into Zoro's skull. She looks like a furious wet cat ready to swipe her paws at the source of her irritation - or maybe more like a stubborn toddler refusing to back down from a standoff with a particularly dead statue.

Zoro, on the other hand, looks like he’s trying to channel his inner rock, his expression stony and unyielding. But there’s a twitch in his eyebrow, a hint of something dancing in his eyes, as if he’s secretly enjoying this absurd standoff with her.

But just when it seems like the silence might go on forever, a small, involuntary twitch at the corner of Zoro's mouth gives him away. Raya catches it immediately and can’t help but smirk triumphantly, knowing she’s won this round.

"Glad you agree," she replies, her voice laced with sarcasm. She throws him a bottle of beer, flipping her hair in his face.

With an irritated grunt and a shuffle away, Zoro instinctively catches the bottle and takes a long swig, his gaze fixed on Law as he monitors his movements. For a while, the two of them stand in silence, the only sounds being the distant ruckus of music and voices and the gentle creaking of the ship blending beneath them.

“Whatever. Let’s go inside before he sees us fucking around up here,” he murmurs. And with a swift spin and snatch, the crates of clinking alcohol disappear from Raya’s arms and into the swordsman’s. While he casually strides into the crow’s nest. Raya remains standing there blinking stupidly, completely taken off guard by his quick-handed thievery.

With that, the realisation rises, a growl set on her face as she stomps after Zoro, hot on his heels.

“Don’t forget we’re sharing those!” she hisses.

In response, the swordsman rolls his eyes but doesn't protest, knowing that arguing with Raya will only prolong their time on deck where they risk being spotted by Law. He sets the crates down with a thud, and they both settle into a comfortable silence as they crack open the bottles and down their drinks.

Zoro’s expression is unreadable as he surveys the mess before him. "So, what's the plan?" he asks, his voice gruff but curious.

Raya sighs, running a hand through her thick hair as she tries to gather her thoughts. "First, I need to assess the damage," she says, leaning her elbows over the table above the broken sword. "Then… I guess I’ll get cooking…"

Zoro nods, leaning on the table beside her as he examines the poor mess of Kikoku. The once formidable blade lies in pieces before them, the jagged edges reflecting the dim light of the lanterns overhead.

"Well, it's definitely broken," Zoro says straight-faced.

"Thanks for that insightful observation," Raya snaps, reaching for one of the broken pieces of the sword. “Really, what would I do without your thought-provoking commentary, Roronoa?”

“Well, what else am I supposed to do?” He retorts, laying lazily against one of her stools. “I’m trapped in here, doing fuck-all.”

Raya looks at him indifferently and shrugs. “Sleep?”

“I’m not tired, I’m bored.”

Raya smirks, a sudden mischievous glint appearing in her eyes. Whatever idea she’s cooked up is getting her excited, with the way her teeth are gleaming in their full glory.

"Weeeell, lucky for you, I've got just the thing to cure your boredom," she says, reaching under the table and pulling out a tattered colouring book and a handful of crayons. She sets them on the table in front of Zoro with a playful grin. "Try this. I'm sure Chopper won't mind if you borrow it for a bit."

Zoro eyes the colouring supplies sceptically, his brow furrowing in disbelief. "You've got to be kidding me," he mutters, picking up one of the crayons and turning it over in his hand. Raya offers him a shit-eating grin when he raises an eyebrow at her.

 "Come on, it'll be fun!" she urges, nudging the colouring book closer to him, repeatedly pushing it into his elbow like prodding a wad of lettuce on a stick to an unimpressed tiger. "And who knows, maybe you'll discover a hidden passion for art."

Zoro hesitates for a moment, then sighs dejectedly and takes the crayon, flipping open the colouring book to a random page.

"You’re gonna be the end of me," he mutters, leaning back in his chair and starting to colour in a picture of a pirate ship.

Raya watches with amusement as Zoro tentatively starts colouring - his movements, cautious at first before he gradually gains confidence, his strokes becoming bolder and more deliberate. She can't help but snicker at the sight, finding it oddly endearing to see the idiot swordsman engaging in such a seemingly childish activity.

For a while, they work in companionable silence, the only sounds being the scratching of crayons against paper, the clinking of metal and the occasional chug of beer as they take breaks to de-sober themselves. Raya finds herself relaxing as she focuses on the task at hand, the tension of the earlier confrontation with Law fading into the background.

But as they work, she can't shake the feeling of Kikoku's presence beside her, the broken pieces of the sword humming with a furious energy that seems to seep into the air around them. Raya glances at the shattered remains of the once formidable blade, a frown tugging at her lips as she tries to make sense of the strange sensation.

Kikoku seems to be muttering to her, the fragments of the sword vibrating with an intensity that sends a shiver down Raya's spine. She strains to make out the words, but they're muffled and indistinct like whispers carried on the wind.

"Kikoku, what are you saying?" Raya murmurs, reaching out to touch one of the broken pieces of the sword.

In immediate response, Kikoku screeches from underneath her fingertips, making Raya flinch her hand away in shock.

‘What do you fucking think, you incompetent excuse of a human being?’ It screams in Raya’s head, rattling her very bones in her body.

Raya clenches her teeth, anxiously running a hand through her hair. "I’m sorry, Kikoku. I really am. I don’t know how it all… If you let me, I promise I’ll be able to fix you."

Kikoku hums angrily in response, the vibrations of her broken body resonating against the desk. It swirls around on the wooden surface, almost trying to will itself to spiral around into a flurry of blades.

‘Not enough. I seek for revenge. Not enough. Not enough.’

"Kikoku, please," Raya pleads softly, her voice laced with desperation. "I understand that you're angry, but I can fix you. Let me help you.”

Again, the sword vibrates with an almost manic energy, its broken edges glinting ominously in the dim light of the lanterns.

"I’ll find a way to make things even, I promise," Raya continues, her voice tinged with determination. "But for now, I have to focus on fixing you. Once you're whole again, we can figure out what to do next."

‘What are you planning, human?’ she spits, her voice sharp and demanding. ‘Let me listen to your pathetic attempt at salvaging my trust.’

The swordsmith takes a deep breath, steeling herself for what comes next. "First, I need to assess the extent of your damage," she says, reaching for another piece of the broken sword. "Then, I'll figure out a way to repair you. And if that's not enough... well, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it."

Kikoku's response was a begrudging silence, the vibrations of her broken pieces slowly starting to calm. Raya took it as a small victory, a glimmer of hope in the midst of uncertainty.

Raya offers a tentative smile to the sword. “I won’t let you down.”

Hours pass in a blur as Raya meticulously fits the broken pieces of Kikoku back together, her hands steady despite the weight of the task. It's slow progress, but with each piece she adds, she can feel Kikoku's energy shifting, becoming less volatile and more... resigned.

"I'm sorry," Zoro blurts out suddenly, the words tumbling from his lips before he can stop them, his voice slightly slurred from the amount of alcohol in his system.

Raya’s head snaps up, surprise flickering in her eyes as she meets Zoro’s gaze. Her fingers pause in the momentum of her work, work now being the last thing on her mind.

 "I… For what?" She mutters out.

Zoro leans over the table, his fingers gently spinning the bottle around in his hands.

"For...for breaking the sword," Zoro admits, his voice tinged with regret. "I didn't mean to...I mean, I know that doesn't excuse what happened, but I just...I'm sorry."

Raya pauses, taken aback by the unexpected apology. She stares at Zoro, seeing the sincerity in his eyes despite the haze of alcohol clouding his judgment.

His lone grey eye remains steadfast on her, and although he tries his best to mask himself into indifference, a flicker of something breaks through when Raya really looks at him with her soft brown eyes.

Something breaks within him – or more so, something loosens up within him, and his control over himself - albeit hanging on by fragile and intoxicated threads - has finally been torn apart.

Raya doesn’t know why, but her breath catches in her throat when he does this. When he really looks at her. With that grey eye, intense and relentless with feeling.

In a panic, she immediately disengages from the stare and looks down to her lap, one hand fumbling with a hammer, the other shrouded in a red-hot flame for blade-tempering.

For a moment, silence envelops them, broken only by the faint sound of their breathing and the occasional crackle of flames from Raya's hand. She's not used to hearing such sincerity from him, especially not when it comes to admitting fault. It catches her off guard, leaving her at a loss for how to respond… and now, she doesn’t know what to do.

Instead, she focuses on the task at hand, the broken pieces of Kikoku spread out before her like a jigsaw puzzle waiting to be solved. She takes a deep breath, trying to steady her hands as she reaches for another piece of the sword.

"It's... I know, Roronoa," Raya finally manages to say, her voice barely above a whisper. She can feel the warmth of Zoro's gaze on her, his silent offer of forgiveness hanging in the air.

Raya can’t control it any longer. She has to look up at him again, and when she does, her warm brown eyes latch onto his enraptured gaze with such ease, with such naturalness.

And then, Zoro’s stare softens.

Raya doesn’t even recognise this… look on the swordsman, this out-of-place soft glint that consumes his face, like he’s finally uncoiled his hands from the tight reins of his self-restraint.

Zoro doesn’t know what else there is to say. He doesn’t know how he’s supposed to feel at this moment, either. But in his drunken courage, his hand acts out of its own will, lifting up and away from his bottle as his eyes flicker down to her mouth.

Raya’s breath halts as she remains still. Her own senses have vanished away, along with her train of thoughts, and all she wants to do is to lean into his hand.

And they do. Zoro’s fingers press against her jaw, deftly lifting her chin up. He makes her stare straight at him with no room to escape. And Raya is completely breathless. She gives in to the pressure of his fingers, blinking at him curiously, observing the all-consuming focus on his face. His eye flickers down from her gaze to her mouth, his thumb laying idly only a few millimetres away from her skin.

And with no thought in those eyes, his thumb reaches and presses to the corner of her lips, swiping in one circular movement. For a moment, Raya’s lost in the intensity of Zoro's gaze, the heat of his touch lingering on her skin like a brand.

A subtle breath releases from his lips when he touches the corner of her mouth.

He moves his thumb again, unsatisfied with the singular touch, now placing it ever-so softly over Raya’s lips. He looks at her in the eyes, his gaze darkening and unwavering, as he brushes his thumb over her mouth, parting them ever so slightly, so softly, so slowly.

But then, as quickly as it came, the moment passes. Zoro pulls away, his expression once again hardened into a mask of indifference. He picks up his bottle, taking a long swig of sake as if to wash away the lingering traces of emotion.

He shows his thumb to you, a layer of dark black powder coating his skin.

“You had soot on your face,” he mutters out roughly.

Raya blinks in surprise, her heart pounding in her chest as she processes what just happened. She can still feel the lingering warmth of Zoro's touch on her lips, the ghost of his thumb brushing against her skin, the heat of his breath hitting her skin.

And for a moment, she's at a loss for words, her mind reeling from the unexpected intimacy of the gesture. She looks up at Zoro, her gaze searching his face for any sign of what he might be feeling, but Zoro's expression remains impassive. His eye remains unreadable as he wipes the soot from his thumb with a nonchalant air - it's as if the moment never happened, as if he's already moved on from whatever fleeting emotion prompted his actions.

She swallows hard, trying to push down the heat that surges within her. She knows that she should say something, to retort back with a typical Raya joke or simply say something really sarcastic, but all of the tricks in her conversational mind die right at the tip of her tongue, right at the entrance of where his fingers were laying against only a few moments ago.

But before she can do anything – to recover any tiny piece of dignity that still remains within her, a sudden crash from outside the crow's nest shatters the moment, sending them both scrambling to the porthole with hushed breaths.

As they silently peer into the window, they’re met with the sight of Law stumbling towards the door, his movements erratic and unsteady, a wild look in his eyes.

"Shit," Raya curses under her breath, her heart pounding in her chest. "He’s early."

[begaydodrughailsaten]

Sorry guy about to have an autism moment

This just in

We're receiving reports that a new fad is taking the nation by storm

Its name? Jorts

But it appears as if this breakthrough in jean-shorts splicing technology is causing irregular weather patterns all across the globe

Woo, It's the warmer season, so I can't wear jeans

I really like the denim, but not the length of the seam

My mom dresses cas' and my dad likes to preen

I'm not like either of them, I got the recessive gene

Jort storm, Jort storm's coming tonight

A Jort storm, it's a category five

Jort storm, Jort storm's coming tonight

I said, "a jort storm's coming, go run and hide"

Jort-icane

Jort-nado

Jort-nami

Jort-quake

Jort-ruption

Jort-alanche

Jort-pocalypse

Breaking news

Millions of Americans have been sucked directly into the "Jortex"

And it's heading straight for this studio

To my wife Cheryl, and son Timmy, I love you—

(Jorts) The elders foretold (Jorts) of a fashion so bold

A new God of the Earth (Jorthulu)

Seal it in denim and turned it into Jearth

The jort storms coming (Jorts)

So you better start running fast, it's a chase

But be careful 'cause these jorts will chafe you (Yeah)

They're the new sensation (Jorts)

Wear 'em to every occasion, Jorts in the pool

Or even better, wear them to a funeral, yeah (J-J-J-jorts)

My personality is ninety-nine percent jorts

I got a genetic test, but all my genes were shorts

Jort storm, jort storm's coming tonight

A Jort storm, it's a category five

Jort storm, jort storm's coming tonight

I take off my fucking jorts, I got-a jorts inside

[theshittymarimo]

Dreams and Daemons

Chapter 3: Franky, Brook Fandom: One Piece Summary: Introduction of Harley and Alma. Words: 1 191 Prologue - Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4

Franky - HARLEY, Texas Longhorn

“Fertility, masculinity, strength. With a fiery temperament and no lack of brute strength, the bull is a very strong symbol of masculine power. It is often associated with the sun, but also with the moon and the skies. It is also a symbol of justice and order.”         - “Dæmons Unveiled: Navigating the Bonds of this World”, Filipe Haulman

Franky’s daemon, Harley, loved to transform into ferocious animals that looked impressing, causing people to think twice before they tried to do something to them. Franky delighted in it and constantly challenged Harley to change into new, stronger animals that he could create new weapons to, making him into a super cyborg daemon. Designing new weapons that made Harley stronger than any other daemon they met was exhilarating; he looked super cool! Regardless of who you were, you were bound to hesitate when you saw a rhinoceros with cannons mounted on each shoulder. It didn’t matter that Iceburg was speaking to them like they were fools for thinking so, Franky thought he was probably just jealous as his daemon was a stupid little mouse. She couldn’t even carry a little laser, Franky thought, although now when he was thinking of it, that would be pretty super that too… But his Harley was undeniably the coolest. However, when the marines came to take Tom-san away, no shape mattered anymore. Even a rhinoceros with cannons was powerless before the World Government. That fateful day, Franky stood on the rails in front of the train carrying their creator to his death. Beside him stood Harley, tears welling in his eyes as he changed into a bull with long horns for the first time. The perfect form, if any, to stop an oncoming train. Together, they would surely stop the train. No matter what. They wouldn’t let them take Tom-san away. Franky’s body broke and Harley’s body shattered into golden dust. Franky had probably never been closer to death than that day. Harley returned to him as the bull again, and after a few initial days of silence when Franky was too busy struggling to survive, he could finally focus on his daemon again. “That thing?” Franky spoke for the first time, prompting Harley to perk up from where he lay patiently while Franky worked. “Mm”, Harley hummed, looking over his unscathed body. “Seems like it.” Initially, it felt like a bitter reminder of their failure that day. But Franky soon discovered how practical it was with a long hanger attached to his daemon, no need to put down any tools, and Harley was still strong with a couple of sharp tips. Even if he would totally look more super with a couple of cannons mounted on him. Brook - ALMA, Dog, Austrian Black and Tan Hound

“Companionship, loyalty, protection. Dog medicine can often teach us how to be a good friend, the power of forgiveness, and how to love unconditionally. Dog people tend to have good intuition, keen senses and quick-learning, intelligent minds.”           - “Dæmons Unveiled: Navigating the Bonds of this World”, Filipe Haulman

“Ooowoooowoooo..!” Nami, Usopp and Chopper had been quaking in their boots from the sound. An eerie wail emanated from the ghostly ruined ship in front of them, sounding like the lament of a spirit crying for an impossible redemption amidst the dark fog. It felt straight out of a horror story. Nami really, really didn’t want to climb up the rope. Screw the lottery; she wanted to stay alive, damn it! She lamented while crying in the little boat they had used to approach the ship. Damn that captain who had been shivering in excitement since they first saw the ship. Surely Sanji was enough? The spine-chilling howling echoed again, and Nami barely kept herself from yelping. Then, something white suddenly began to shift through the wood of the ship in front of her. She felt her face pale as she watched a freaking transparent head of something slowly revealing itself, until she saw two black holes emerging from the rotting wood of the ship. Staring straight at her. No. No, no, no, no, nonononono! She shrieked in horror as she climbed up to Luffy and Sanji in record time. She didn’t even complain when Sanji got all lovey-dovey when she jumped into his arms. Let him die first; she didn’t care. It all got worse from there. The damn skeleton showed up—an impossibly moving skeleton, mind you, that asked to see her panties. She was so done. But then, through the rotten wooden floor, a freaking ghost appeared! She knew it was the thing she had seen earlier, no mistaking those dark holes for eyes. But now she could see it was a dog. All white and slightly see-through, like a freaking ghost (it couldn’t be repeated enough times). Oh, and it slightly hovered above the wooden floor; did she mention that part? Like. A. Freaking. Ghost. Luffy was ecstatic. That idiot. She wanted to kill him when he asked them to join his crew before she or Sanji knew what was going to happen. And the skeleton said yes! The ghost dog next to him wagged its tail happily. She could feel her soul leave her body. --- Brook was ecstatic, he had met people! People! They weren’t hallucinations but had invited him over to their ship. He hadn’t been on another ship in fifty years, so he knew that it wasn’t something he was imagining. Alma was just as excited as he was. She was leaping and running around in the kitchen with her tongue hanging out of her mouth. She showed no care that half of the time she was running through some of the people in the room who shouted and yelped in shock from the chilly feeling whenever she did so. The other daemons in the room clearly didn’t know how to react when the strange daemon jumped up to them and licked them. But they couldn’t feel the tongue; instead, it disappeared into their body with a chill. The tiger daemon had tried to swipe after her, but to her clear bewilderment, her paw just swept through the transparent body in front of her. Brook soon explained to them what had happened to him. That he had eaten a devil fruit and when he died, he returned as a spirit. “Ah, and I had Alma by my side!” he said happily, looking to Alma who stopped in the middle of her lap around the table and beamed up to him as well. “Well, she was a spirit as well. We searched for my body and when we found it, it was already a skeleton. But I was able to return to my body, and Alma stayed by my side!” Alma flew up into the air with a happy woof. Brook introduced himself as Dead Bones Brook and Alma joined in happily – “And I’m Phantom Alma!” The new people they met stared at them in bewilderment, while the captain’s smile somehow widened even more.

I had a hard time to choose between two names for Franky's daemon, and in the last moment before uploading this chapter I changed it into Harley. I wanted a typical american name for him and with Franky's bike Harley felt like a very fitting name. A rhino could've been a very fitting animal for him but I had an image of a Texas Longhorn for him for a long time, and it feels like a more humble animal for him fitting for the lesson he learned after Tom. Instead of a horn for attacking enemies, he got an animal with horns also made for taking attacks. Dear Brook and Alma.. At first I was searching for an austrian animal for him but soon it came to me that I didn't have a dog yet and it feels very fitting for him. And so I found the breed of Austrian Black and Tan hound. For a long time I imagined Alma as a skeleton as well, but one day it hit me that she would be perfect as a spirit like Brook is when he can let his soul out of his body. Somehow she didn't turn into a normal deamon again after Brook's first death, nobody is really sure what she is now, but on the other hand nobody is sure if this have ever happened before. I wanted to give an image of both before and after Brook's first death so you get two different images of them both here. As a bonus, the name, Alma, coincides with the Spanish word meaning "the soul". If you're wondering about Jimbei, fishmen and mermen are different from humans in that they don't have daemons. For humans it was just another way that they were different from humans and made them more similar to animals. But to fish-/mermen it is said that their whole souls are inside of them and around them in the sea, they are never separated. While humans are the strange exception in the world who are so separated in their souls that they're splitted, always searching for fulfillment.

[aurvmz]

one piece by eiichiro oda, small description, personal thoughts and review

ONE PIECE SPOILERS AHEAD!!! BECAREFUL!!!

small overview : one piece is about a boy named monkey d. luffy who strives to be the pirate king after the first pirate king, gol d. roger was executed and left behind a treasure that has all wealth, fame, and power called the "one piece" luffy's goal is to gather a crew to find the one piece and become the pirate king (his TRUE TRUE goal/dream isn't found out yet tho).

______________________________________________________________

personal thoughts : i think one piece was good/alright, i used to be a huge fan before i watched bleach but the thing i feel about one piece is that sometimes it'll get repetitive and slow, especially in the anime, i like the art style and i like the expressions and the way all characters are drawn, and i think the manga covers are extremely nice and represent the chapter well, also there's a LOT of foreshadowing in them. (the cover of volume 25, showing shanks, luffy, blackbeard and buggy)

(the cover of vol 105, showing blackbeard, luffy, shanks, and buggy, this time they are yonkos (emperors of the sea)

______________________________________________________________ review and categories : ______________________________________________________________ world building : 5/5 i feel this was expected. the world building possibilites in one piece are ENDLESS, there are always new places, first with the grand line, then the new world, then wano, then egghead and i can go on and on, absolutely 0 complaints. (wano country, dressrosa, and water 7)

______________________________________________________________ female cast : 2/5 this is where one piece lacks ALOT, alot of the female characters are very unrealistic and overall weak, serving no purpose other than fan service, there are a few good characters like robin, nami, and big mom which are strong and serve a major part in the crew and the show.

(tashigi, perona, robin, nami, boa, vivi, and big mom, from left to right)

______________________________________________________________ power system : 3/5 the one piece power system mainly consists of haki and devil fruits, i feel devil fruits are lacking as some can just be downright overpowered, like the quake quake fruit which can end the fucking world and then there's a fruit that just turns you into a jacket, haki has 3 types, armament, observation, and conquerors, it's a nice system but it's extremely similar and there's alot of the times, nothing new and repetitive.

(gear 5 luffy, using his strongest attack, bajrang gum mixed with his devil fruit powers and haki)

______________________________________________________________ pacing : manga 4/5, anime 2/5 (overall 3/5) the pacing in the one piece anime is one of the worse and is one of the main reasons why people reccomend to read the manga instead, there's not alot to say about this but yh.

______________________________________________________________

conclusion : 3/5 one piece is an amazing story and the most popular out of the big 3, although it has some problems, the characters are extremely likeable, it's extremely funny and relatable.

[charlottepuddingsama]

I have other WIPs I’m theoretically “”working on”” but currently I have in my head this idea about the crew gets captured and the bad guy segregates Zoro and drugs him with something that reduces him to his base instincts for like 24hrs and the guy’s like, “MWAHAHAHA, I shall unleash this rabid beast and he will tear his own crew to shreds as he is not but a man of carnage and death!!” And he expects them to quake in their restraints but they all look at each other and shrug and are like, “Oh, yeah, okay. Sure.” And he’s like “???? Uh… okay…. Anyway, RELEASE THE HOUND!!!!” And Zoro, who really has been frothing at the mouth in the cage they had him in, launches out at impossible speed, and Luffy like yawns, unsheathes all three swords, and Sanji is checking his nails, winds up for a vicious attack, Nami is distinctly spacing out, and then… he cuts all their restraints and immediately turns heal to just completely obliterate the bad guy and his whole crew bc Zoro, at his base instinct, is protective of those he loves.

The rest of the story is him like following Sanji around the market, or not letting Chopper more than five feet away, actually reacting to “good boy” and perking up at being rewarded with booze, and it ends in a giant cuddle pile

[costons]

Chapter 3 above ^^^^^^

Egghead - The island of the Future. | Monkey D. Luffy x Reader.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Chapter 4

~ Egghead - The Land of Science. ~

A few days later in the thousand sunny:

The Crew seemed to have awakened from their winter slumber. The winter falls has sprung into deep action. After so long, when I looked up at the skies it seemed as if they were breaking free and opening for an unknown world, the waves thrashing, the thousand sunny quaking over the ocean sea.

The sun shines down on me and gives me light but there is nothing that fills my soul with joy. The wind flaps my coat like some form of rejection, ruffling the material, scratching the skin underneath before changing thoughts to the potential iceberg issues up ahead.

The iceberg that sunk the mighty ship and killed all aboard with such fright. With a shudder I am reminded that in just a matter of hours I will be going out on this same water filled vessel. In another matter of hours the boat will recreate the scene from a popular history book I had been lended from my childhood years.

The very scenario that caused many sailors to kill themselves rather than endure what came next. But how can one forget the sound of an iceberg snapping a ship apart? This very day I will find myself sailing past the massive snow-white giants with its menacing cold dark ocean floor looking for land.

For miles upon miles upon miles the ice builds to perfection and then shattering when you get too close to the surface. My journey will not be an easy voyage either, it will require skill and strength that only certain people are qualified for. The next island, it shall be a challenge we all must face even if it spits the reckoning death on ourself.

It is a trek of endurance that one must always learn, not an overnight ride that seems simple enough. But is does take time, time is something no one has much of anymore. Not those who dwell on the island and still hunt down whatever they can find, remembering what fellow folks had said back in Wano. Thinking back at the major flame incident, I lift up my coat slightly to reveal a rational burn mark that's been carefully examined and treated for.

People forget things once they leave it behind.

Perhaps we should learn from that. I never knew such rules existed in the beginning of my life. Never heard such words spoken, nor seen any for myself.

Though,  One could always think for themselves and do things however they wished. People would say different things but then again you did what you thought was right, being you.

Looking out at the horizon I am able to look far away beyond my sight but upon noticing an island, turning back to the fellow members, noticing them shouting commands at one at each other as I stood gripping the rails. Our progress shall become slower than what they were hoping for but nonetheless, We Are headed towards a new beginning...The beginning of another adventure...I guess...for us all.

"Furl the Sails! The wind is too strong!" Jinbe demands, looking off at the navigator whom seems to be complaining. "Are we close to making land, Nami?"

"Brr! It feels like we've entered an Islands Climate zone!...I guess the next island is a winter Island!" Nami shouts, shivering away from the cold, replying to the Fishman.

But her voice was almost unheard, yet again we failed to reach the next destination as soon as planned. Was it a fate of man made or naturally formed? Why do we lose so often on our journeys through life.

The waves crash on, farrowing faster then before.

It seems as though it will rip off anything that isn't fastened or tied down.

We're tired, drained and cold. As the sun has risen ever higher it takes more work to maintain a balance.

Tiredness overtakes us all and makes us lazier than ever, huddling together to keep warm. We hold on tightly while resting within our dreams. The thought of our purpose fades.

What exactly are we doing here? The moments before our captain shouts,

"Hey Nami! What in the world is that?!" His voice piercing the sky, pointing out to the strange enormous ball forming in the sky ahead.

peering over the edge with a gasp.

Standing up in front of me stands an imposing enormous ball form.

It was frighteningly big, looming larger than the buildings I had known back home. It would look like an ancient artifact compared to what we've known since. As I take a closer look, I notice that the surface of the ball is covered in intricate patterns and designs, almost like a map of some kind. I can't help but feel a sense of awe and wonder as I gaze upon this mysterious object.

Without warning, the ball begins to glow with a bright, pulsating light, causing me to shield my eyes.

"What are you... HUH?! AN EDDY CURRENT?!..BUT ITS GOING UPWARDS?"

"Yohoho! It looks like an Afro!" Brook exclaims, staring at the huge rounded ball, pointing to the current and then towards his hair.

"A rapid temperature change is dangerous! We got to run, Jinbe! We'll be swallowed up!" Nami shouts loudly, gaining the attention of everyone.

"Leave it to me!" Jinbe clamou knows they has a long way to go, they cannot afford any delays as there might not be time to make it back.

But while some leave quickly, others linger. A little ways away from them, some watching in despair, longing for their friends but knowing they can't do nothing.

"Wait! Someone's in the water!" The captain, who are leaving notices, pointing at the sea which is churning violently due to strong winds and currents.

A distant call echoes across the waves, a lady shouting for help.

"No..he's right! I can hear a lady in distress!" Sanji shouts, looking at the navigator, practically begging to turn the ship around.

"I'll cut it." Zoro blankly says, gripping onto one of his katanas, glaring at the current ahead.

He nods once, holding out the katana, its sharp blade gleaming in the light.

Sanji eyes him nervously, sensing that something's wrong but he had no idea what. Shouting, "You'd better not leave a scratch on the lady!"

Zoro glares at the Love Cook, "Do you trust me?" flashing a devilish grin, before he runs towards the current.

"Bird Dance!" Zoro yells out, cutting the current in halves, grabbing the lady.

However, before he could throw her onto the deck, she clung to the opposite edge, and was pulling herself back into the sea, clearly determined to keep her distance from Zoro due to the forceful grabbing.

Zoro yelps, anger bursting inside of him, glaring at the woman.

She continues pulling herself back, but with only five meters separating them now. It's close, so very close! So very dangerous! But...but, it could also end well. With a hard pull, Zoro managed to grab her shoulder, pulling her onto the ship.

With Sanji rushing forward, Zoro grabbed hold of her other arm, pushing her towards the cook. In disbelief Sanji shouts, "What the hell is going on?! Glaring at the Swordsman, noticing how he shoved the lady right before his eyes.

Whistling over, gaining their attention. I shout, "It's not the time for fighting you know?! I mean..Luffy and Chopper were just flown away!" Frustratingly pointing to the two in the air, wailing.

[stephenbland]

What is your opinion on “Jorts”

Well i think- wait hang on a minute I'm (under the readmore)

I'm receiving reports that a new fad is taking the nation by storm

Its name? Jorts

But it appears as if this breakthrough in jean-shorts splicing technology is causing irregular weather patterns all across the globe

[Verse 1]

Woo, it's the warmer season, so I can't wear jeans

I really like the denim, but not the length of the seam

My mom dresses cas' and my dad likes to preen

I'm not like either of them, I got the recessive gene

[Chorus]

Jort storm, jort storm's coming tonight

A jort storm, it's a category five

Jort storm, jort storm's coming tonight

I said, "A jort storm's coming, so run and hide"

[Bridge]

Jort-icane

Jort-nado

Jort-nami

Jort-quake

Jort-ruption

Jort-alanche

Jort-pocalypse

[Verse 2]

The jort storms coming (Jorts)

So you better start running fast, it's a chase

But be careful 'cause these jorts will chafe you (Yeah)

They're the new sensation (Jorts)

Wear 'em to every occasion, jorts in the pool

Or even better, wear them to a funeral, yeah (J-J-J-jorts)

My personality is ninety-nine percent jorts

I got a genetic test, but all my genes were shorts

[Chorus]

Jort storm, jort storm's coming tonight

A Jort storm, it's a category five

Jort storm, jort storm's coming tonight

I take off my fucking jorts, I got-a jorts inside

[Break]

Breaking news

Millions of Americans have been sucked directly into the "Jortex"

And it's heading straight for this studio

To my wife Cheryl, and son Timmy, I love you—

[Verse 3]

(Jorts) The elders foretold (Jorts) of a fashion so bold

A new God of the Earth (Jorthulu)

Seal it in denim and turned it into Jearth

[brainyxbat]

Chapter 3: Huge Battle! The Giants Dorry and Broggy!

(episode 71)

-

Usopp, Venus, and Nami could only watch in terror, as a fat, mountainous, Viking-like figure sent trees crashing down left and right. They screamed at his gaze landing on them, before he let out a huge, bellowing laugh. "So..." He leaned down to their level with a tooth-baring grin, "What's the answer?"

"W-what was that?" Nami stammered. "C-could you repeat that?"

He leaned in closer. "I asked you if you have any alcohol."

"A-alcohol?" Venus raised an eyebrow.

Usopp nodded fearfully, as Nami inched away. "We've got a little..."

"So you've got some?" He smiled with ecstasy.

"I-it's not for drinking. It's for cooking and disinfection. But if you like, we'll give it all to you," Nami offered, as Usopp backed away with his hand holding Venus' wrist.

The giant let out an earth-quaking scream, scaring the three into losing their footing. He looked back, and it turned out that a t-rex had bit into his backside. Usopp protectively kept Venus close behind, as they all gawked. "Dino..." He whimpered.

"Dinosaur?" Nami squeaked.

The giant wielded his axe, and to the trio's horror, beheaded his attacker! Usopp and Nami fearfully hugged each other, keeping Venus in between, as the head fell like a rock.

"I'm Broggy, Elbaf's strongest warrior!" He laughed in victory, and held the head out to them. "Now I've got meat too. I'll treat you, my guests." They stared in terror, getting the wrong idea, before collapsing on the deck.

Broggy stared in confusion, and in concern, when they weren't moving. "H-hey..." He poked at Usopp's belly.

"P-pretend we're dead," Usopp whispered, "No matter what happens."

"D-doesn't pretending to be dead only work on bears?" Nami asked quietly.

Venus' forehead was prodded next, before he was silent, and watching them. "I think it's working," She whispered.

-

"Whoa! What a view!" Luffy admired the island from the brachiosaurus' head. "I wanna have lunch here."

"This isn't the time for idle chatter!" Vivi scolded from down on the ground with Karoo.

"Ahhh... oh?" Something caught his attention. "So there really are volcanoes. And there's a mountain with huge holes as well." He grinned widely.

"It's dangerous! Come down already!" Vivi ordered.

"Huh?"

"Even if it's well-behaved, it's still a dinosaur!"

"This guy's no trouble!" He assured with a hand wave. "More importantly, there're huge holes over there!" He pointed to his right. "That's one weird landscape!"

"Forget about the landscape! Just come down!"

Instead, Luffy stretched himself to look his ride in the eye. "Say, I have a favor to ask. Will you take me over there?" The longneck ignored him, and continued eating from a tree. "Hey, stop being so mean, and take me there." Still nothing. He readjusted himself, and pointed to the holes. "Over that way! That way!" When it continued eating, he stretched his arms around its neck. "Not this way, here! This way!" He forced it to look in said direction, to Vivi and Karoo's terror.

"Who'd do something like that?!"

A quaking rumbled throughout the area, as Luffy ceased his forceful movements. "Oh, sorry. But, um..." To his ecstasy, more brachiosaurus', the source of the quaking, came in stampeding, and loomed over him. "Amazing!!"

"Luffy-san! Like I said, it's dangerous! Come down already!"

He didn't hear Vivi's orders. "And those dinosaurs are taller, so it looks like I'll have a better view."

"That's not the point!"

Luffy launched himself on a taller dino's head, and looked again. "As I thought, I can see the holes better." He turned around at hearing a growl, and jumped away from another's snapping jaws, clumsily landing on its head. "Oops!"

"Watch out!" Vivi watched in terror, as he dodged them left and right.

Luffy, on the other hand, was enjoying himself, despite the danger. "Vivi!" He slid down one's neck. "Wanna come over here?! It's fun!" They could only gape at him without a word, before he pulled himself up on the tallest's head. "The view from here is especially good!"

Unfortunately, his ride flicked him up in the air, and caught him in its jaws! "He's been eaten!" Vivi exclaimed.

Luffy sat up on the brach's tongue in confusion. "Where am I?" He then started falling down its long throat, grabbing his hat along the way; out of nowhere, it was beheaded, giving him a way out. He soon landed on a giant, waiting hand, as the ground rumbled. "Whoa..."

The skinny, Viking-like giant laughed. "I was watching. What a lively human, grappling with longnecks in this jungle. You're the first guest in a long time."

"You're huge! Are you a human?"

"You're asking me if I'm a human?" He laughed again, and held his sword behind his back. "I'm Dorry, Elbaf's strongest warrior!"

On the ground, Karoo had collapsed in fear, so Vivi was kneeling in the grass. "G-giant! I've heard of them, but this is my first time actually seeing one."

"I'm Luffy. I'm a pirate."

"A pirate?! Good for you!"

"Karoo! Wake up! We're getting out of here while we can!"

Just then, Luffy remembered his friends down below. "Oh yeah, the ones over there are Vivi and Karoo. Nice to meet you!"

Vivi glared in his direction. "Luffy-san had to open his big mouth!"

Dorry laughed heartily. "I'll invite you guys to my home!"

-

Elsewhere, Broggy was roasting drumsticks of t-rex meat over a fire. "It looks yummy."

Usopp turned his eyes to his back cautiously, keeping his body still otherwise. "How long do we have to pretend to be dead?"

"After all, this strategy doesn't seem to work against a giant," Nami whispered.

He averted his gaze to the girls, and accidentally squealed at a pile of skulls. "Shh!" Venus shushed.

Broggy looked back at the noise, but strangely, they didn't appear to be moving. "Hmm, I guess it was my imagination."

Usopp turned his head, and laid back down in relief. "Why'd you make a noise?" Nami asked quietly.

"I couldn't help it, since there're tons of skulls lying around!" He defended himself.

"I know, but..."

"I wonder if we'll be eaten like that soon." He whimpered.

"Don't give up!"

"We'll be fine," Venus added.

"But..."

Nami sat herself up. "We don't have to wait here like this, just to be eaten."

"It's yummy! It's yummy! Dinosaur meat!" Broggy sang through his work. "Grill it with red flame, and take a big bite! It's yummy! It's yummy! Dinosaur meat!"

Nami, Usopp, and Venus sneaked away behind his back. "That way!" The moment they were at the other side of the mountain, they urgently made a run for it, no longer staying quiet. When Nami and Usopp leaped over a fallen tree, Venus wound up clumsily tripping over it. "Ow!"

"You...!" Nami grumbled in frustration.

Usopp came rushing over, and took her hand. "You okay?"

"Yeah, thanks." She regained her footing with his help, brushed herself off, and they stopped to catch their breath. Usopp collapsed to his knees, as Venus flopped on her back.

"I-in any case," Nami panted, "We were able to escape."

"Y-yeah," Venus heaved.

"At least we got far away from that giant's stomach!" He wheezed, but then squeaked in fear when he felt a drop on his back. They all looked up, and a saber-tooth tiger was eyeing them with hunger from a tree.

"Uh oh," Venus' eye widened.

"But it might've only gotten us closer to a saber-tooth tiger's stomach," Nami remarked nervously.

They screamed and made a run for it, with the fierce feline hot on their tails. "No! No! No! No!" Soon, the four were running in the opposite direction, now the targets of a t-rex. A giant's foot stepping in their path made everyone screech to a stop. It was Broggy, from earlier; and he looked hungry. The t-rex and tiger zipped away, leaving the trio shaking in fear.

"In this jungle, no matter what we do, our fate will always be the same!" Usopp cried. "It's just a matter of whose stomach we end up in."

"We did everything we could," Nami shook her head, "Let's accept our fate."

Broggy kneeled down to look them in the eyes. "Oh, you guys're awake? The meat is done; have some! It's in return for the alcohol."

-

Later on, the three gaped in awe at the dinosaurs roaming the area, before a single drumstick was set down, towering over them. "Now, eat! Dinosaur meat tastes good."

"I-I have no appetite," Nami stammered.

"Don't hold back!" Broggy insisted.

"I don't want to eat," Nami and Usopp refused nervously.

"Dinosaur meat tastes good, I'm tellin' ya."

They continued to hold back. "Is he trying to get us to eat the dinosaur meat first..." Usopp whimpered.

"In order to fatten us up a little..." Nami continued.

"And then eat us?" He finished.

"Yeah, he's acting like a giant, all right."

"When we're still so young."

"Maybe we taste best when we're young."

"What a waste..." Broggy remarked, "It's good, I'm tellin' ya."

"Hey, it is good! Guys, you gotta try it!"

Nami looked up at the witch's voice. She and Usopp gaped in horror; she was eating! "VENUS!" She yelled.

"What're you doing?!" Usopp cried.

"Eating," Venus replied, "I'm hungry from all the running."

"He's gonna eat you!" Nami hissed.

"No he won't; I don't taste good. Besides, no sense in wasting food."

She fell back in defeat when Venus kept eating. It seemed Sanji was rubbing off on her. "If we somehow keep fasting until the Log is stored, and don't get fat, we may be able to survive."

"But how long will it take for the Log to be stored?" Usopp asked fearfully. "If I don't eat for three days, I'm sure I'll get tempted by this smell of meat, and eat it."

"Broggy-san! Can I ask you a question?"

"Hmm? What's the matter, young lady?"

"H-how long will it take for the Log of this island to be stored?"

Broggy smiled widely. "One year."

"What?!" The two collapsed at that.

Venus almost choked on her bite. "A year?!"

"Oh no," Nami whimpered, "There's no way we can fast for a year."

"I... definitely can't help eating," Usopp cried.

"Well, make yourselves at home!" He laughed.

-

Meanwhile, Dorry was at his own home with Luffy, Vivi, and Karoo. Luffy was helping himself to a large drumstick. "This is yummy, giant old guy!"

"Your pirate lunch thing tastes good too, although it's a little too small for me."

"Of course it's good!" Luffy had another bite. "It's a special lunch the chef on my pirate ship made. If you say it's bad, I'll beat you up!"

"Beat me up, you said?" He laughed, as Vivi and Karoo tensed up. "What a funny squirt you are!"

"Th-they're becoming awfully friendly," Vivi remarked.

"By the way, why are you living alone, old guy?" Luffy asked. "Isn't there a village or something?"

"Hmm? There is a village. It's a warriors' village called Elbaf. It's somewhere in the Grand Line."

"Hm?"

"But there're rules in the village."

"Rules?"

"For example, if we start a fight in the village, and both sides can't back off, we are judged by Elbaf's God. Elbaf's God always gives divine protection to the righteous one, and lets the righteous one survive."

"I see... Elbaf's God, huh?"

"I caused a disturbance, and this island is currently the site of a duel between a certain man, and myself. The righteous one will win the duel, and survive." Dorry laughed. "But we haven't been able to settle this for about 100 years."

"You guys've been fighting for 100 years?!" Luffy asked in surprise.

"It's nothing surprising, since our life span is at least three times as long as yours."

"Even if it's three times, your interest in fighting would wane in 100 years, wouldn't it?" Vivi questioned. "Is there any point in continuing to fight? It's a duel to the death, right?!"

-

"Well, I shouldn't be outdone by Zoro with this one," Sanji boasted to himself, now dragging the t-rex he faced off against earlier on, "It's decided that I'm the winner of the competition to obtain kilos of meat."

"I'm the winner of the competition to obtain tons of meat!" Zoro gloated, also dragging his three-horned adversary.

After turning a corner, the two rivals encountered each other. "Zoro!"

"Sanji!"

They smirked at each other pridefully. "I win!" They declared simultaneously, before glaring. "You lose!"

They pushed their catches side by side for comparison. "Look! My prey is bigger!" Sanji pointed out the t-rex's tail extending past that of the triceratops.

"What?!" Zoro exclaimed angrily. "This competition is about how many tons of meat we can get, right?! Mine is obviously huskier than yours!"

"Ha!" Sanji scoffed. "It's all a matter of if we can use it for cooking. Your prey looks full of bones. It has no more than 5 grams of meat for cooking!"

"There's no way we can eat meat full of sinews like that!" Zoro insisted.

"Tsk! There's no use in competing with such small prey," Sanji smirked, "I'll go capture a big one that'll silence you."

"Okay then," Zoro agreed, "I'll go capture a super big one that you can't even touch this time."

They watched, as a volcano suddenly erupted in the distance. "Okay. The next eruption is the signal to end the competition," The cook decided, "Bring back your prey to the Going Merry by then."

"Yeah, I'll take you up on that!"

-

"Whoa!!" Luffy watched the eruption with Vivi, Karoo, and Dorry. "That's a huge volcano eruption!"

"Well, time to go," Dorry stood on his feet.

"Hmm?"

-

With Broggy, the trio noticed the eruption as well, after Usopp and Nami gave in to temptation. "What's that?" Nami wondered nervously.

"An eruption... hmm?" Usopp turned to Broggy when a drumstick was thrown in to the fire, to see him staring daggers. 'His face suddenly got tense...'

"Sorry, I have to head out for a bit." He stood up with a wide grin

"What? Head out?"

"Yeah," Broggy replied to Nami, "That was a signal for the duel that I've been in for 100 years."

"A duel?"

"With whom?" Usopp asked. "Where, and for what reason?"

"Reason? I don't remember." Broggy laughed, as Usopp gulped.

-

"It became our routine before we realized it," Dorry said to Luffy, "The eruption of the central mountain is the signal for the duel."

"What?!" Vivi exclaimed. "To have such hatred that you'd try killing each other for 100 years is... what on Earth caused this fight?!"

"Stop it," Luffy ordered with his hand up, surprising her, "It's not like that." After she lowered his hand, another giant appeared amongst the trees.

"Right. It's because of our pride." As Broggy charged in, the duel officially began. "I forgot... the reason a long time ago!" Their weapons clashed, sending a sonic wave washing over the whole island

"What? Wh-what's wrong?" Vivi looked over Luffy in concern, when he fell on his back.

"Oh boy," He puffed out some air, "What a huge duel!"

-

Deeper in the trees, another t-rex sniffed at a strange, square hut made entirely of a white substance; it then tried to take a bite out of it, only to break its teeth. "Hey, big lizard." Mr. 5. "You're in our way."

Ms. Valentine, now wearing a blue jacket over her lemon dress, smiled evilly. "Let me take care of it." She shot up into the air above their adversary's head. "10,000 Kilogram Press!" She rocketed back down, and crashed into it, before walking inside with Mr. 5.

"Oh hello, Mr. 5," A man greeted him. He was in a blue striped sleeveless shirt, yellow-green pants, and blue sneakers, and had his hair slicked up like a number 3 on top of his head. Mr. 3. He was with a child-looking woman with red braids, a blue cloud-print button-up, a teal t-shirt with "Golden" on the front in orange, a maroon skirt folded down at the top, purple and white striped stockings, a pink wide-brim hat with a green band, and pink sneakers.

"Ha! What an extravagant power you have, building an improvised house in the jungle," He commented, "Let me tell you something, though. This mission is still ours." After hearing of Mr. 5 and Ms. Valentine falling short at Whisky Peak, the two were ordered to go assist them. "I don't want you to meddle in it."

"We'll never goof up like that again," Ms. Valentine added.

"Goof up?"

"Hmm?"

"That's not it. You two are weak, Mr. 5, Ms. Valentine." Mr. 3's words made them angry. "Well, don't look so stern. Look at this." He took out a wanted poster that looked decades old, featuring a younger-looking Dorry and Broggy, with a 200 million berry bounty. "I'd like to thank you for giving me an opportunity to come to this island."

Mr. 5 had a closer look. "Dorry the Blue Ogre, and Broggy the Red Ogre of the Giant Warrior Pirates."

"I've heard of them in an old tale," Ms. Valentine remarked, "This is a wanted poster from 100 years ago!"

They turned to Mr. 3. "Yeah, but those guys now live on this island. Their bounty then was 100 million berries per head. 200 million berries for the two of them."

"200 million berry bounty heads? But they're giants," Mr. 5 pointed out.

"Superb criminals execute their crimes by using their superb brains," Mr. 3 lectured, "All you have to do is follow my instructions. If we give it a little thought, we can cut through any mountain."

[aduckmurder]

This just in, we’re receiving reports that a new fad is taking the nation by storm

Its name? Jorts

What it appears is if this breakthrough in jean-shorts splicing technology is causing irregular weather patterns

All across the globe

It’s the warmer season so I can’t wear jeans

I really like the denim but not the length of the seam

My mom dresses cas and my dad likes Supreme

I’m not like either of them I got the recessive gene

Jort storm

Jort storms coming tonight

A jort storm it’s a category five

Jort storm

Jort storms coming tonight

I said a jort storms coming go run and hide

Jort-icane

Jort-nado

Jort-nami

Jort-quake

Jort-ruption

Jort-alanche

Jort-pocalypse

The jort storms coming (Jorts)

So you better start running

Fast it’s a chase

But be careful cus these jorts will chafe you down

They’re the new sensation (Jorts)

Wear them to every occasion

Jorts in the pool

Even better wear them to a funeral yeah

(J-J-J-jorts)

My personality is 99% jorts

I got a genetic test but all my jeans are shorts

Jort storm

Jort storms coming tonight

A jort storm it’s a category five

Jort storm

Jort storms coming tonight

I take off my fucking jorts I got more jorts inside

Breaking news

Millions of Americans have been sucked directly into the jort-tex

And its heading straight for this studio

To my wife Cheryl and son Timmy

I love youUAHHHHH-

The elders foretold

Of a fashion so bold

A new god of the earth

Decided it’d be better to turn it into jearth

[the-masked-person]

Jort-icane

Jort-nado

Jort-nami

Jort-quake

Jort-ruption

Jort-alanche

Jort-pocalypse

The jort storms coming (Jorts)

So you better start running fast, it's a chase

But be careful 'cause these jorts will chafe you (Yeah)

They're the new sensation (Jorts)

Wear 'em to every occasion, jorts in the pool

Or even better, wear them to a funeral, yeah (J-J-J-jorts)

My personality is ninety-nine percent jorts

I got a genetic test, but all my genes were shorts

No comment

[boba-sea]

This just in, we’re receiving reports that a new fad is taking the nation by storm Its name? Jorts What it appears is if this breakthrough in jean-shorts splicing technology is causing irregular weather patterns All across the globe It’s the warmer season so I can’t wear jeans I really like the denim but not the length of the seam My mom dresses cas and my dad likes Supreme I’m not like either of them I got the recessive gene Jort storm Jort storms coming tonight A jort storm it’s a category five Jort storm Jort storms coming tonight I said a jort storms coming go run and hide Jort-icane Jort-nado Jort-nami Jort-quake Jort-ruption Jort-alanche Jort-pocalypse The jort storms coming (Jorts) So you better start running Fast it’s a chase But be careful cus these jorts will chafe you down They’re the new sensation (Jorts) Wear them to every occasion Jorts in the pool Even better wear them to a funeral yeah (J-J-J-jorts) My personality is 99% jorts I got a genetic test but all my genes are short Jort storm Jort storms coming tonight A jort storm it’s a category five Jort storm Jort storms coming tonight I take off my fucking jorts I got more jorts inside Breaking news Millions of Americans have been sucked directly into the jort-tex And its heading straight for this studio To my wife Cheryl and son Timmy I love youUAHHHHH- The elders foretold Of a fashion so bold A new god of the earth Decided it’d be better to turn it into jearth

WHEN DID JORT STORM GET IN HERE

[cebwrites]

with a s/o who’s jumpy/easily spooked (Usopp, Sanji, Marco)

gn reader, fluff/comfort word count: 0.8k

Usopp

He’s similar to you in a lot of ways, so Usopp of all people would understand your feelings best

It’s hard being on a crew of monsters fielding beasts and bastards from all angels on the Grand Line, only getting by by your wit and, in most cases, the skin of your teeth - you love the rest of your crew, most of all your captain, but they’d never really understand like Usopp does, he’s just a regular person, as you are

When things get tough, you’re both quaking in your boots, yet somehow, you always end behind the talented sniper or held tightly in his arms as Usopp hauls ass out of there if even he knows that the situation is too much to handle alone

And when it comes to the mundane (to the Strawhats) - spooky stories from the crew’s resident, though very macabre, mom, things that go bump in the night, or a simple storm - Usopp is always there beside you, never any judgement and always trying to take your mind off things with tales of his brave adventures, if the circumstances allowed, holding your hand all the way through

If there’s one thing you can absolutely count on him for though, it’s pest control; when you shriek and squeal at a spider in the tub, Usopp is confident in his abilities to quickly and swiftly remove the little guy from your premises

(Yes, he’ll still hold and comfort you for the ‘emotional damages’ that the hairy legged creature caused afterwards, but only after he’s washed his hands)

Sanji

Please, he’d do anything to be your knight in shining armor, he’d dreamed of this day since he was reading fairytales with Reiju in his mom’s lap

Sanji dives to your aid at a pin drop, nothing makes you scream and gets away with it (well, maybe bugs, but he tries to be brave for you anyway), even mice - although he does have a soft spot for the little critters, so they’d end up being rehomed instead of removed

Whenever you tense up or make a noise, a gasp, of displeasure, his arm is immediately around you, whispering loving reassurances into your hair and making sure that no harm would come your way

Against an enemy attack? Hell, seeing you there spurs his protective instincts on even more to keep you safe; anyone foolish enough to challenge Sanji by threatening his dear lover would end up fillet, battered, and fried without a second thought

At the same time, though, he does feel for you - there was a time where Sanji couldn’t protect himself, let alone anyone else, so he’s determined to use his strength now to do just that

You’re his lover, the light of his life, his everything, Sanji would sooner give up his dreams than let anything bad happen to you (you chastise him about this, but his mind is made up)

Although, he would ask for your patience and kindness when it comes to creepy crawlies, but if it’s any consolation at least you get to scream and cry together when Nami or Zoro eventually have to come into the kitchen and kill the “ghastly creature” for (the both) you

Marco

Marco is definitely the most laid back in comparison to the other two

Being on a crew like Whitebeard’s is tough, most who’ve been here would know that and discourage anyone who doesn’t have the stomach for it to find other passions, or at least a different pirate ship

But they also know that no one particularly chooses the circumstances that they’re in, especially these ones - Marco especially, so he’s patient with you, kind, in his own little ways

He’d notice you putting up a brave front, but still catch those minute flinches and leaning away from certain stimuli when you think no one’s looking

He doesn’t say anything about it, but you find his presence around you more often in these times, usually under the guise of “just wanted to be near you, yoi,” and it doesn’t take long for you to figure out what he’s doing

You’re thankful that he’s letting you save face, but unwilling to open up quite yet about it, that’s fine, Marco would give you as much space as you needed

If it came down to anything medical, though, of course he’d want to know about it to best help you but if you aren’t ready yet he won’t push - still, Marco would let you know that there’s no judgement anywhere and he’s here for you no matter what

Whenever he sees that you’re on edge, possibly from a scare that he wasn’t there for, he instinctively pulls you close, ignoring hoots and hollers from other member’s about PDA, or leads you somewhere quiet to get a breather and simply take comfort in his presence

[jimintomystery]

The Search for Noah's Ark

Many ancient cultures had accounts of a hero surviving a divine flood by building a giant boat, but the story of Noah (Genesis 6-9) stands out, since it is included in the canon of the Abrahamic religions. For centuries, it was not unusual for Jewish, Christian, and Muslim writers to report that Noah's Ark was still sitting on the mountain where it came to rest at the end of the story. But it wasn't until the 20th century that a documented expedition went to look for it.

[Above: A man stands between Mount Ararat, where explorers typically look for Noah's Ark, and a sign for Noah's Ark National Park, the official location of the ship according to the Turkish government.]

The Bible says Noah's Ark landed in "the mountains of Ararat," without any clear indication where that would be. A 4th century Latin edition translated "Ararat" as "Armenia," popularizing that association in Western Christianity. The Armenians themselves used Greek or Syriac bibles, so they only learned of the Ararat-Armenia connection centuries later, from visiting crusaders. Thereafter, the sacred Armenian mountain Masis has been known as "Mount Ararat." Since the 1920s, the mountain has been a part of Turkey, which calls it Ağrı Dağı ("mountain of pain").

After the first confirmed ascent of Mount Ararat in 1829, it became more plausible that someone might go up there and look for Noah's Ark. But the idea wasn't taken seriously until the 1940s, when an article circulated about a Russian pilot spotting a giant wooden boat on Ararat during World War I. Supposedly, the czar ordered a thorough exploration of the structure, but then those no-good godless commies took over and suppressed the findings. The story was ultimately discredited, but not before it stoked the imaginations of American Christians that were eager to prove that the Bible was literally true.

Fascinated by the Russia story, realtor Eryl Cummings and his wife Violet devoted the rest of their lives to tracking down stories about Ark sightings. These tales typically involved American soldiers who said someone showed them a photo of the Ark during World War II, or old Armenian immigrants who supposedly visited the Ark as children. "Ark fever" heated up, though, when a sighting was reported from Turkey. In 1948, Eryl was invited to lead an Ararat expedition planned by retired missionary Aaron J. Smith. Cummings declined, however, and Smith ultimately led the trip himself the following year.

The 1949 expedition is instructive, because it sets the tone for all subsequent attempts to visit Ararat in search of the Ark. Upon arrival, Smith was beset with bureaucratic delays. Permits needed to be paid for, and local authorities rejected clearances that had been granted at the federal level. Reading between the lines, its clear to me that Ark-seekers would pay anything to achieve their dreams, and corrupt Turkish officials took full advantage of that. The team quickly depleted their funds, and didn't get to the mountain until the end of the climbing season.

It's also telling that there hasn't been a lot written about Smith's mission, not even by the Ark hunters who followed in his footsteps. It's much easier to find stories about the Fernand Navarra controversy in the '50s and '60s, or people who couldn't even prove they'd been to the mountain. And it's Eryl Cummings, not Aaron J. Smith, who came to be seen as the father of the movement. There's a simple reason for that: Smith put in the work, but he didn't find anything. Cummings, on the other hand, accumulated all of the tantalizing stories of people who might have found something, which could become a useful lead for the next expedition.

[Above: Reconciling descriptions from two purported eyewitnesses, Elfred Lee illustrates the collapse of Noah's Ark into Ahora Gorge. The gorge was formed in 1840 by a powerful earthquake, which happens to precede the earliest alleged sightings in modern times. Violet Cummings suggested that the quake was divinely ordained to reveal the Ark and usher in the Apocalypse.]

The 1970s saw a wave of books about the search, most of which derived their information from the work of Mr. and Mrs. Cummings. Violet and other writers cast the quest in an apocalyptic light, suggesting that God had hidden the Ark all this time only to reveal it as a sign that the End Times were imminent. The implication was that Noah's Ark could not be discovered until the appointed hour but, paradoxically, Judgement Day will be stalled unless believers find the ship as soon as possible.

"Arkeology" arguably peaked in the 1980s, when astronaut Jim Irwin took up the search. By that point Turkey was wary of letting amateur climbers wander around so close to their border with Iran and the Soviet Union. But the eighth person to walk on the Moon was able to open some doors and, more crucially, cut through some red tape. However, Irwin still had to deal with the punishing conditions of Mount Ararat itself. His adventures there are best remembered for the injuries he sustained, and the heart issues that made it increasingly unwise for him to return year after year.

Jim Irwin no doubt inspired a new generation of Ark-seekers, but by the late 1990s the community was bitterly divided about where to look. For thousands of years, legends suggested that the ship was in plain sight for anyone who dared to climb up and find it. But fifty years of aerial reconnaissance, satellite photography, and boots on the ground had proven otherwise. Debate intensified about whether Ararat was even the right mountain, and about the validity of other possible sites, forcing people to re-evaluate the established lore surrounding the quest. So you end up with one "arkeologist" attacking the reasoning of another, often with logic that could be extended to dismiss the entire search.

[Above: In 2010 Noah's Ark Ministries International released photos like this one, purportedly taken inside a massive wooden structure on Mount Ararat. NAMI refused to reveal the location for independent verification, citing security concerns. Within days of the announcement, former associates of NAMI came forward accusing them of staging the whole thing.]

That background of in-fighting put a damper on a 2010 press event claiming that a Hong Kong evangelical group had found the Ark on Ararat. You'd think video footage of this discovery would delight Ark hunters. On the contrary, many were as skeptical as mainstream scientists. The feuding over which Ark theories were right or wrong had left them wary, because if some flaky story captured the public imagination, it might discredit the entire movement. Which is ironic, considering that the movement wouldn't exist at all if not for an urban legend about a Russian cover-up.

At a glance, it may seem like "Ark fever" is part and parcel with religious fundamentalism, or maybe just a specific flavor of Christian anti-intellectualism. However, even some influential creationists have debunked the search for Noah's Ark. There's no scriptural basis for assuming that God arranged for the Ark to remain intact until modern times, or that it was meant to be rediscovered, or that locating it would have any bearing on the end of the world. The entire rationale for the search is that dozens of unconfirmed reports can't all be wrong, which isn't a solid foundation for an archaeology project.