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titleknown · 4 years ago

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...I know we may have had our disagreements on environmental policy, the social safety net, the filibuster, democracy, but any death is a tragedy, and I understand your loss...

-Excerpt from Kerry Crown’s very biting-her-tongue letter regarding the circumstances in West Virginia.

AHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ROT IN HELL SHITBRICKS!

-DW Devlin, being slightly more honest upon the news.

-------

Who is this West Virginian Weirdo? Well, their name is Great Grafton, and more on them after the break!

The first reported sightings of this entity were spoken of online, through rumors. No pictures exist from these sightings due to recording devices being obfuscated by extreme amounts of smoke exuded from the creature.

The first true media record of Great Grafton was its appearance at the Last Hope Mine, during a press conference in which both of West Virginia’s senators were to publicly speak about their support for M.E.C.H.

In the most popular bipartisan action in the last 40 years, both senators were crushed under Great Grafton’s huge feet as they exited the mine.

Great Grafton’s name was based on its resemblance to the Grafton Monster, except for the veins of what appeared to be coal running through its wet bulk, and the fact that it was so large they might as well just give it the name of the town it bore a volumetric resemblance to.

And, indeed, sightings of the Grafton Monster have increased dramatically throughout West Virginia, though they have seemingly grown more aggressive and hostile to humans, leading to speculation the original entities may have been eusocial. That Great Grafton is their “queen,” and something has gone terribly; terribly wrong.

It mainly stays within the general range of West Virginia, but most kaiju tend to keep their distance for good reason, aside from those with wind-based abilities or ones who are either comically oblivious (Jiira) or just will fight anything (Viroko).

The extreme amounts of smoke exuded from the creature’s body will choke all but the most hardy of kaiju respiratory systems, and while not quite viewed as “conscious” response, things around Great Grafton tend to spontaneously combust, including other kaiju.

Which is troubling, because despite their admirable work in political direct action, they appear to have a greater “agenda” (if they are even conscious of it) that worries most. For, its wandering appears to be directed mainly at coal mines, both defunct and active, setting them alight all at once with its presence.

When it leaves, the fire not only disappears, but in addition the amounts of particulate pollutants and carbon dioxide are below average. Which would be good, if it weren’t for the fact it seems to be actively depositing these in a recent, terrifying geological formation.

Known as the “Volcano” or the “Tree of Death”, this huge funnel has the highest recorded sightings of Grafton monsters around it collected like a noose, and while no human has gone inside, the toxicity level concentrated in the area appears to be spiking frighteningly fast.

While many are distracted with other matters, most who know of this are terrified of the ticking time bomb, because they are well aware that; whatever it is; it aint good...

If you wanna catch up on the previous history of this setting, here’s Year 1 and Year 2 archived on the Wik for the newbies!

And, as per usual with Kaijune, this horrid hulk is free to use as you see fit under a CC-BY 4.0 license so long as I; Thomas F. Johnson, am credited as their creator!

And, if you wanna support me, maybe check out my Patreon, or even just send a Ko-Fi my way! Every penny is appreciated, and I am eternally grateful for those who donate!

Or, if you wanna commission me for a pic like this, my commission info is thisaway!

I will bluntly say, I made this specifically so I could have Joe Manchin get crushed to death by a kaiju in-universe, because fuck Joe Manchin.

It’s based on the Grafton Monster, specifically because it was a West Virginia cryptid I could see crushing politicians (Sorry Mothman) and also because it looks distinctive, which is also why I modeled the body in TinkerCad as a base, in an experiment!

And yes, for the record, the volcano is a reference to RTGame, both because it still worked as a creepy cryptid thing and; I mean; I had to...

#kaiju #kaijune #west virginia #joe manchin #grafton monster #my art

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arrow-guy · 4 years ago

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Broken Flock (7/??)

Summary: It’s been two years since you uprooted your life and left to figure out who you really are, leaving behind Bucky and Clint with little more than a note as a warning. Now, New York is calling your name and it’s time to go home. How will Clint and Bucky react to your return, and how will the time have affected your relationship?

A/N: Again, this chapter is dealing with really heavy themes that could potentially trigger some readers. Please read at your own discretion.

Page dividers by @carryonmyswansong

Word Count: 2.8k

Pairing: WinterhawkxReader

Warnings: Kidnapping, panic attack, mentions of sedation, needles

Part 6

Clint and Bucky don’t get home till nearly four in the morning. They stumble up the stairs, exhausted and on the verge of collapsing. They’re determined to make it up to (Y/N)’s apartment before they fall asleep.

They bundle into the apartment and are surprised to find only the stove light on. (Y/N) usually leaves, at least, a couple of lamps left on in the living room and a lamp on in the bedroom. Bucky looks up at Clint, concern evident on his face and Clint squeezes his arm in an attempt to reassure him. Clint moves further into the apartment to check the bedroom, while Bucky investigates the kitchen.

It only takes Clint a moment to flick on the bedroom light before he calls out to Bucky and joins him in the kitchen. He stops short when he sees Bucky hunch in on himself and cover his mouth with his hand.

"What is it?" Clint asks.

Bucky holds up a slip of paper. "Something's wrong."

"What?" Clint turns on the rest of the kitchen lights and takes the paper from him. "She left a note?"

Bucky nods silently and Clint gently pulls him to his chest with one arm. He runs his hand up and down Bucky's back, hoping to keep him calm, while he reads the note.

Hey guys!

I don't know if you'll be back before me, but in case you are, I'm heading out to stretch my wings. After last week I think I need a little break, haha. It's 8:45 right now, but I'll stop by Clint's place to feed Lucky before I head out for the day. I'll have my phone with me if you need to get in contact.

See you when you get home!

(Y/N)

P.S.: I'm not running away again. I promise.

The note falls from Clint's hand and he wraps his arms fully around Bucky. It slowly sinks in that (Y/N)'s been gone for well over twelve hours and Clint begins to panic.

"Maybe she decided to camp out for the night," Clint offers. "She hates being cooped up for too long."

"No, she would've texted or called or something." Bucky takes a deep, shaking breath. "Something's wrong, and you don’t want to admit it."

“Of course I don’t wanna admit it, Buck. She’s-” Tears form in his eyes and he wraps Bucky tighter in his arms. “She’s our girl.”

“We gotta get her back.”

“We will.”

Bucky shakes his head and pulls away. “I can’t do this again. I can’t lose her.”

Clint wipes away Bucky’s tears and then his own. “I know. And we’ll find her. I’m gonna call Steve and Nat and Sam. We’re gonna get every single pair of eyes we can on this.”

Bucky covers his face with his hands and Clint tucks him under his chin. They stand silently in the kitchen until they’re able to speak again. Bucky takes a seat on the couch and texts Steve while Clint immediately calls Natasha. He can hear Bucky sniffle and has to force himself to stay where he is.

Natasha is not in a good mood when she picks up.

“It’s four in the morning.”

“I don’t give a shit, (Y/N)’s gone.”

“What do you mean she’s ‘gone’?”

“Bucky ‘n I just got home and she wasn’t here.”

“She probably ran off again. I know you don’t want to hear this, but she’s done it once, she’d probably do it again.”

“The fuck she would, she’s settled here, Nat. She wouldn’t just leave without telling us.”

“You don’t know that.”

Clint’s tempted to break something. “Nat, I’m telling you, she wouldn’t fucking do that. She wouldn’t do that to us. Not again.” His breath catches in his throat and he does his best to hold back his tears. “Please, Nat. We need your help.”

Natasha sighs. “Fine, I’ll be there in a bit.”

Clint sighs, relieved. “Thank you. Would you bring Steve with you? Buck’s getting in contact with him, but we need his help on this.”

“I’ll let him know.” She pauses. “Anyone else you want on this?”

“Sam,” Clint says. “He’s good at this kind of stuff. And I’m gonna call Tony and see if he can help at all. I don’t want him physically looking for her though. We’re already impatient enough as is without adding his stress to the mix.”

“Okay. See you soon.” She hangs up before Clint can say goodbye.

Clint sits on the coffee table in front of Bucky and takes hold of his shaking hands. “Nat’s on her way over with Steve and Sam.”

Bucky nods, but it’s clear that he’s still trying to process what’s happening. “Okay.”

“I’m gonna see if I can get Tony to help us track her phone.”

“Okay.”

“We’re gonna find her, Buck,” Clint murmurs. He kisses Bucky’s knuckles. “I promise.”

“You’re sure she didn’t just leave again?” Natasha asks.

“I’ve already fuckin’ told you, she didn’t just leave,” Clint growls.

“She left a note,” Bucky says. His voice is rough and makes Natasha do a double-take. When she sees his red-rimmed eyes, she realizes how serious this is.

“Can I read it?”

Bucky nods and points to the kitchen counter. Steve picks up the slip of paper and scans over it before handing it to Natasha. Her frown grows deeper the further she reads into the note. She opens her mouth to speak and Clint holds up one hand to stop her.

“We know she’s missing. Her laptop is still here and so is the rest of her stuff.” He wraps his arm around Bucky’s shoulders and sighs. “Like I said. She wouldn’t do this to us.”

“No, Clint I get that. Do you know where she would’ve gone?”

“North,” Bucky croaks out. “We were up there a couple weeks ago. She likes flying up there.”

“Did Stark manage to find her phone?” Steve asks.

Clint shrugs and checks his phone. “I think he’s still working on it. I’ll call him again-”

“No,” Steve says. “It’s alright, I’ll do it.”

Clint absentmindedly rubs circles against Bucky’s shoulder, trying to calm himself more than Bucky at this point. For all of his optimism, Clint knows how much he’s lost throughout his life. He’s lost his brother to the Swordsman, his childhood to abuse and the circus, his mother to his father… Hell, even his shitbrick of a father dying was a loss. But losing (Y/N) a second time overshadows all of that. There’s no time to mourn or process, just an overwhelming need to go, find, rescue. The urge to protect Bucky is there, too, but he knows that Bucky would never fall into his arms like a damsel in distress, even if there’s a tiny part of him that wishes he would. Wishes Bucky would let him take care of him. But he knows that taking care of Bucky means finding (Y/N) first.

Steve interrupts his thoughts, letting them know that Stark’s found the location, and Clint coaxes Bucky to his feet. He grabs his spare bow and quiver from his apartment before they leave the building.

Dawn breaks and brings even more anxiety with it.

They find her phone in the middle of the field Bucky had taken her to not even a month ago. Bucky's heart drops to his feet and he would walk away from all of this if it weren't for Clint's hand on his shoulder.

Bucky crouches down and picks up the phone. The screen is freshly cracked and the battery is nearly dead. He pockets the device and scans the surrounding area for any other sign of human life. He's about to say something when he notices that the top of a nearby tree has been snapped off. He reaches out to Clint and takes off as soon as he's got a hold of his hand.

"What is it?" Clint asks breathlessly.

"Something."

Clint knows better than to try and get anything more out of him when he's like this.

Bucky drags Clint to a clearing littered with crushed leaves, broken branches, and feathers that are too big to have come from any kind of bird. Both men freeze at the sight in front of them and Clint feels nauseous when he notices the dark, tar-like substance stuck to the majority of the feathers.

"I-I saw the broken off trees and I…" Bucky trails off and drops to his knees. "Oh, God."

Clint glances up from the carnage to see Sam hovering in front of a particular tree. He grabs something before he drops to the grass and walks over to Steve. Clint sees him say something about a bag and "Caught on a branch." His stomach clenches and he manages to force himself to walk over and investigate.

Sam turns as Clint approaches and holds out a tattered pack.

“I’m sorry, man,” he says. “This is all I could find.”

Clint reaches out with shaking hands and takes the bag. His breathing stutters. “Shit.”

“Is it hers?”

Clint nods. “Yeah. It’s hers.” He looks around the clearing. “The feathers are hers too, and they’re every-fucking-where.”

Clint watches Natasha prod at a clump of feathers. She frowns when she touches the tar-like goop and a string of it pulls away with her fingers. She scowls and walks away, making a note on her phone. Bucky’s wandered over to the one clear space in the middle of the grass and Clint joins him. He takes Bucky’s hand in his and hopes it’s at least a little comforting.

“She fell here,” Bucky murmurs, tracing a vague indentation in the grass. “And then it's like she just disappeared.”

Clint shakes his head. “She didn’t disappear, Buck. She was here. We’ll find her.”

He kisses the side of Bucky’s head and wraps him in a tight hug. Bucky hesitates, but slowly wraps his arms around Clint’s middle and presses his nose to his chest. Clint notices Natasha speaking with Steve and his brows pull together when she glances back at him before talking to Steve again. He sees her say “shot down” and “kidnapped” and the hopelessness starts to settle in again.

There’s something wrong with my left wrist. Probably a sprain. Both of my wings are sore from tip to shoulder, but I think I twisted my right wing on the way down to the ground. My ribs are probably fractured after snapping so many branches, and it’s hard to breathe. Secondary to all of that, every inch of exposed skin stings with little tiny scrapes and cuts.

I have to take my time in sitting up and wince when my wings stretch a little too far. There’s something that’s stopping my feathers from fanning out to the point that any kind of movement slowly becomes painful. I slowly extend my left wing, hoping to investigate whatever's stuck to my feathers and stare in confusion at the mess of black goo covering the majority of my secondaries. Cautiously, I reach out and try to remove some of it, and I only succeed in pulling a feather loose. I swear and flick the goo that came away on my fingers to the floor.

I sigh and try to fold my legs underneath myself, but my motions are inhibited by a pair of shackles around my ankles. A long length of chain tethers the shackles to the floor. With that, in combination with the crippling soreness that's starting to settle deep into my bones, I realize that I'm not getting out of here any time soon. Wherever here is.

I shuffle back until my back hits the wall and my eyes slowly begin to adjust to the low light in the room. It looks like I’m being held in a small barn. Little slivers of light creep through cracks in the walls and fall across my hands, revealing every little cut and scrape. I sigh and angle myself so that I can reach the goop on my left wing. I lick the pads of my fingers and try to work some of the stuff from my feathers. It’s slow going, but I manage to avoid pulling out any more feathers.

Eventually, I can’t keep up with cleaning myself, and exhaustion settles in every inch of my body. I curl into myself and doze off.

“An excellent specimen, Doctor.”

I don’t recognize this voice. The sounds of conversation slowly creep in at the edges of my consciousness. I keep my head down and just listen.

“As it should be, I made the serum!”

“When was she made?”

“I can’t be sure. It was not a procedure that I performed. I believe she was an accident.”

“Ah, well, you know what Bob Ross says.”

The second voice laughs. “I think you’re onto something, there, my friend.”

It takes a moment for it to register that these people are the reason I have my wings. And they’re just talking about me like I’m some kind of animal. An experiment.

One of them begins to pace in front of me. “It appears that she’s been sleeping for nearly twelve hours. Should we be concerned?”

“No, the serum imparts a sort of healing factor. The fastest way for her to heal is to sleep.” The shift and their shoes scrape along the concrete floor. “That being said, I don’t know the extend of her injuries. And her breathing has changed since we started speaking.”

The one pacing stops mid-stride. “She’s listening.”

“Precisely.”

Their footsteps approach and I panic. Fingers sink into my hair and wrench my hair back. I’m forced to look up at the woman who had previously been referred to as the Doctor. Out of the corner of my eye, I can just barely see the wiry young man that holds my head back.

“What should we do with her?” the young man asks. “Do you think she’s ready for tests.”

“Please,” my voice comes out scratchy. “Please, don’t.”

“I’m not sure,” the woman says. She begins to pace. “On the one hand, I’ve been waiting for weeks to capture her. Her strength and speed are unlike any of our previous subjects. I’m curious to see what makes her different from the others.”

“But?”

“But she’s been very clearly hurt.”

The man’s hold on my hair tightens and I whimper. He just tugs harder and I force my hands to stay where they are in my lap.

“We’ve been very careful in the past,” he says slowly. “We’ll sedate her. Keep her limbs still. She won’t feel a thing.”

“That is true…” I catch the wicked glint on her eyes and my stomach churns.

The young man laughs in my ear. “Excellent.”

“We’ll have to trim the tar from her feathers.” The doctor shakes her head. “Shame. They’re so beautiful.”

“Don’t touch my wings,” I plead. “Please.”

They just carry on as if I’ve said nothing. I watch the man grin, his eyes crazed. The doctor gestures towards the door and several large figures bundle into the barn. They all stalk over, arms outstretched and ready to grab me. I try to shrink away, but the man holding my head is stronger than he looks, and I can’t move an inch.

Hands latch onto my wrists, ankles, and wings, and I cry out in pain. I go limp in an attempt to make myself too heavy to carry, but they just twist my wings back to fold them. I bite down on my tongue to keep every whimper, groan, and sob from surfacing. My wrist and right wing scream out white-hot pain and, each time they jostle me around, a new jolt of pain lances through my body.

The three men dump me face down onto a metal table and roughly strap my arms and legs down. I beg them to leave me. To let me go. To just let me go. Nothing I say seems to reach their ears and tears streak down my cheeks by the time they wench my wings down to the table. Two large clamps descend from the ceiling and pin my wings to the table. I’m stuck and in pain.

The doctor appears at the edge of the room and she slowly approaches me. She seemed hesitant earlier. Maybe there’s some way I can reason with her?

“Please, don’t do this,” I plead. “You don’t have to do this. Please.”

She grabs my face and turns it from side to side. I whimper and pull against my restraints when she twists my head a little too sharply.

“You don’t understand,” she says. She presses my cheek to the table and my entire body seizes up as I feel someone slowly inserting a needle into my neck. “I want to.”

Her manic grin is the last thing I see as the world goes black. The hum of electricity fills my ears and my body goes completely limp.

-------

Part 8

So that was a ROUGH chapter, but I promise that there will be a happy ending I just need you guys to trust me on this.

If you’d like to yell at me, absolutely comment, reblog, and/or shoot me an ask.

If you would like to be tagged in future chapters, please let me know!

Tag list:

@ghostlyhamlet, @claws-of-vibranium, @creaturefeatures101, @buckysendoftheline, @imagine-assembling-the-avengers, @ptprocrastination, @1950schick, @amayasymone23, @arfrona-and-marvel, @ek823, @fanaticfangirl001, @furrywerewolfcollector, @kissofvenom922, @dawn-phantomhive, @fangirlwithasweettooth, @mairhof1, @starryeyesbadguys, @trap-house-homiecide, @buckywhitewolfbarnes, @kaepm981, @howdoesoneadult, @pcdmesamidala, @thefandomplace, @sian22redux, @skeletoresinthebasement, @lady-thor-foster, @jazzcutie, @gaytonystark, @geeksareunique, @nyxveracity, @breezy1415, @feelmyroarrrr, @darling-loki, @lemonadeorange73, @tofeartheunknown, @queenoftheunderdark

This fic:

@avengerscompound, @nerdy-bookworm-1998, @shirukitsune, @keenmarvellover

#winterhawkxreader #readerxwinterhawk #winterhawk x reader #reader x winterhawk #bucky barnesxreader #readerxbucky barnes #clint bartonxreader #readerxclint barton #bucky barnes #clint barton #reader insert marvel fic

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therainroguefanfiction · 4 years ago

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🔥 ℝise Ⱥbove I̾t ◈ Chapter 039 [Hero Informatics]

📑 Table of Contents | ◂Backward

Word Count: 2,619

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

〈“Every single day I feel that gold underneath. I see the locked doors but I got the key. I’mma give you a second just to catch your breath.” Zayde Wolf, “Gladiator”〉

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

My eyes blinked open, vision blurry as I reached for my phone in the darkness. Three in the damn morning… what the fuck woke me up? I reached up to rub at my eyes, feeling something wet against my fingers. Was I crying? Maybe I had a bad dream and that’s what woke me up… but I certainly don’t remember having a nightmare. Whatever.

I rolled over as I yawned loudly, easily slipping back into unconsciousness.

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

The morning sky was covered with dark gray clouds, rain soaking the earth below. Despite the rough morning I had, feeling the cold rain soaking through my uniform felt absolutely amazing, easily putting a smile on my face. It’s weird as fuck since my quirk deals with fire, but I’ve always felt peace when it rains. As a child, I would literally drop everything I was doing when it started to rain so I could just sit outside and watch it fall. To me, the rain signifies new beginnings, washing away the sins of the past.

“Excuse me.”

And then a fucking human being has to come and ruin that peace. I sighed deeply, turning halfway around to see a beanpole of a boy with dark brown hair and matching eyes. “What?”

“You’re… Jen Winchester, right?”

Goddamn sports festival, now everyone and their fucking pet knows who the fuck I am. A bead of sweat dripped down my cheek. Or maybe it was a drop of rain, who knows. “Depends who’s askin’.”

He grinned brightly, adjusting the umbrella handle that sat against his shoulder. “I thought so, but I wasn’t sure. We haven’t actually met – my name’s Yuki Reigen.”

I looked at his outstretched hand with narrowed eyes. That name sounds familiar as fuck but my mind is completely blank, though that’s nothing new. If it ain’t tacos, Deadpool, or cats, I have no spare brain space.

He laughed awkwardly, pulling his hand away. “I looked different when you saw me… my hair was blonde and I was wearing blue contacts. You helped my little brother, Riku.”

“Ah!” Recognition flooded my mind and probably my face. “He’s fucking lucky I caught him when he jumped from the stands. He coulda been seriously fucking hurt, bro.”

He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Yeah, he can be a handful.”

I raised a brow, putting my hand on my hip. “You’re the one that was too fucking distracted by a woman to notice that he had slipped away. Be a better brother before you lose your chance.”

He sweatdropped. “You don’t pull any punches, huh. Anyway, I was hoping to catch you so I could thank you.”

“For what?”

“Riku has always been… a troubled kid. Our dad is a pro hero – not a very good one, but a hero. When mom got pregnant with Riku, dad wasn’t doing too hot money-wise and then he started drinking. He blamed all of his failures on Riku, which is completely baseless.” He shook his head, brow furrowed as he recalled the memory. “I don’t know how, but Riku remembers all the horrible things dad said to him before he left us, so he’s always acted out – getting into trouble, skipping school, picking fights. His eyes were on you from the moment you took down that giant robot. I haven’t seen him that excited in a long time, you know. It’s really small, barely noticeable, but… he’s starting to change and I fully believe it’s because of you. So, thank you, Jen Winchester.” He bowed low, his back becoming wet from the rain.

I smiled, patting his shoulder to make him straighten up. “He’s a pretty good kid. Take care of him, yeah?”

“I’ll work hard to be a better brother!” He smiled, but it quickly dropped when my hand squeezed his shoulder.

“You better, because if you don’t, I’ll cut your dick off and make you eat it, ‘kay?” I smiled brightly, patting his shoulder again.

“Y-Yeah… sure…!”

We parted ways and I continued on toward U.A. high, stifling a yawn as I readjusted my bag across my shoulder. I stepped through the archway of the school and the rain suddenly stopped, making me pause. The fuck? Is there a fucking bubble around the school or somethin’? I glanced up, seeing a transparent umbrella over my head.

Reggian appeared on my right with a grin. “Hey, there Winchester. You’re looking kinda we – holy shitbricks, what happened to your face?!”

I scowled, gently poking at the swollen skin under my right eye. “Aizawa’s fucking cat attacked me while I was fucking sleeping this morning.

“Wait, you live with a teacher?” He wiggled his brows. “Scandalous.”

I rolled my eyes. “He’s a family friend, dumbass. I’m helping him out while he’s injured.”

We continued toward the school building and he hummed. “Did you at least clean and disinfect the wound?”

“I mean, I washed the blood off.” I rubbed my right eye, which is red and still fucking stinging. “I also got toothpaste in my eye.”

“Bitch, how the fuck?!”

“I have no fucking idea… stop laughing, you twat!”

He covered his mouth, clutching the frame of the entrance as his shoulders shook with laughter. “Y-Y-You’re a mess!!”

“Yeah, no shit.” I rolled my eyes before activating my quirk. My body started to heat up, effectively drying my uniform, but his damn laughter fucking distracted me and once my concentration slipped, my damn tie caught on fire. “Fuck,” I scowled, putting the flames out and throwing my burnt tie into the trash bin.

Reggian laughed harder, slapping the footlockers with his hand and earning strange looks from the passing students.

“You’re such a loser,” I muttered, pulling my boots off and changing them for the ugly ass white ones to school makes us wear indoors.

“And you’re a nerd!”

“Your fucking face is a nerd.”

“Your twat is a nerd.”

We stared at each other blankly for a solid two minutes before bursting out laughing, earning even more looks from the passing students. Iida came rushing through the doorway with Zuku close behind and he smiled at me, making me raise a brow. “Good morning, Winchester! Where is your tie? And what happened to your face?”

“She set it on fire,” Reggian managed through fits of giggles, his hand over his mouth. “And angered the cat gods!”

“I see. Please be more careful!” He smiled before turning to the ravenette. “Sorry, I don’t know your name. I’m Tenya Iida, class 1-A’s class rep.”

My brow furrowed in confusion and I glanced at Zuku, who was shaking the water from his umbrella. The last time I saw Iida, he was adamant that I don’t belong here and that I’m connected to the League of Villains, and now he’s treating me like I’m a friend? The fuck?

“Regina Reggian, but please call me Red. I’m from class C.”

“Ah, general studies, I see. It’s nice to meet you!” Iida held his hand out and the two shook hands before he turned to his locked, taking his rain boots off. Reggian sent me this weird-ass wave that looked like he dislocated his wrist before turning and walking away.

Zuku watched him for a moment, chewing on his bottom lip thoughtfully. “So, Iida, um…”

“If it’s about my brother, don’t be concerned. I’m sorry if I made you worry.” Iida smiled, pushing back the hood of his raincoat. “Everything will be fine.” And then he walked away.

Zuku turned to me with a frown, his brow furrowed in concern. “I’m really worried about him, Jen.”

I hummed, throwing my arm around his shoulder in a half-hug. “Just be there for ’em, but don’t push. If he needs help, I’m sure he’ll let you know.”

“I hope so…”

“Come on, we don’t wanna be later.” I ruffled his hair before walking toward class with him close behind. As always, excited chatter greeted us as soon as the door was slid open. Honestly, the day I walk into this room and it’s silent is legit gonna be the first day of the apocalypse, I’m callin’ it.

“It’s so weird that people recognize us from TV.” Ashido chirped happily. “Everyone wanted to talk to me on my way here!”

“Yeah, me too!” Kirishima grinned.

“People on the street were staring at me!” Toru added, her invisible hand resting over her chest. “It was kind of embarrassing,”

“Sure, but isn’t that pretty normal for you?” Ojirou asked softly, sweatdroppng.

Pft, I was just gonna fucking say that. I mean, if I fucking saw a pair of floating clothes going down the street, I’d fucking stare, too, thinking the fucking life fibers were invading. Oh god, and then Nudist Beach would arrive. Just the thought makes me shudder.

“You won’t believe what a bunch of elementary school brats yelled at me,” Sero complained with an expression that clearly said he was shook.

“‘Nice try’?” Tsu guessed and he cried out, grabbing his hair between his fingers. Guess she hit the nail on the head, huh.

I tuned out the chatter, following Zuku to his desk behind a certain blonde. Katsuki was sitting in his desk with his chin resting against the heel of his right hand, clearly still sulking about the festival. I grinned, “Yo, Katsuki. You look constipated, as usual.”

“Shut up,” he grumbled, glancing at me. “You look like someone bitch-slapped you. Twice.”

“I got bitch-slapped by Aizawa’s damn cat,” I deadpanned.

“Dumbass.”

“You still mad about me not making the top two?”

He was silent for a moment, turning his head away so I couldn’t see his face. “… Sparky said you defended me against that blonde extra from class B.”

I hummed. “I defended the whole class, you included.”

Another moment of silence before he spoke, his voice barely above a whisper. “Don’t fucking do that again. I don’t need your dumbass to defend me.”

I smiled, ruffling his ash blonde hair. “I’ll defend all of you ’til the day I die, so get it over it, brat.” I stepped off to the side, ruffling Zuku’s hair, as well, before heading to my seat behind Momo, who sent me a kind smile and a small wave as I passed. She half-turned in her seat, looking like she wanted to say something, but she turned back around when the door slid open.

Hmm, looks like Aizawa got his bandages off, that’s good. “Morning.”

“Good morning, Aizawa-sensei.” The class chorused as he stepped up to the podium at the front.

“Ribbit. Aizawa-sensei, you don’t have bandages anymore, that’s good news.”

He rubbed the skin under his eye with his pinkie. “The old lady went a little overboard in her treatment. Anyway, we have a big class today on hero informatics.”

Hero who in the what now? Fuck, I need my phone. Let’s see, pull up Goggle, type in whatever fucking shit he just said, and search… uhh, ‘the science of processing data for storage and retrieval’… fuck, can a girl get a definition for her definition??

“You need code names,” he said blankly. “Time to pick your hero identities.”

“This is gonna be totally awesome!!”

Aizawa activated his quirk, eyes glowing red as his hair shot up to slap gravity in the face. Seeing this, the class instantly went silent, reclaiming their seats. “This is related to the pro hero draft picks that I mentioned the last time we were in class together.”

His hair fell back around his shoulders as his quirk deactivated.

“Normally, students don’t have to worry about the draft yet, not until their second or third year, actually, but your class is different. In fact, by extending offers to first-years like you, pros are essentially investing in your future potential. Any offers can be rescinded if their interest in you dies down before graduation, though.”

“Stupid selfish adults!” Mineta slammed his fist on his desk, body shaking.

“So what you’re saying is, we still have to prove ourselves after we get recruited,” Toru spoke up.

“Correct,” Aizawa continued. “Now, here are the totals for those of you that got offers.” He clicked a remote and the board behind him sprung to life.

“In the past years, it’s been more spread out, but there’s a pretty big gap this time.”

“Gah!” Kaminari threw his head back with a groan. “That’s no fair~”

“What about the real star, moi?” Aoyama huffed, cupping his cheeks with his hands.

“Todoroki got the most ahead of Bakugo?” Kyoka asked in surprise.

“Yeah, it’s the opposite of how they placed in the festival,” Kirishima added.

“They probably weren’t excited about working with a guy who had to be chained up in the end,” Sero shrugged with a grin.

“If I scared a pro, they’re just weak!!” Katsuki yelled.

Momo sighed sadly before forcing a smile and turning to Todoroki. “That’s amazing. You must be proud.”

“These offers are probably because of my father.” He responded coldly, not sparing her a glance.

Ochaco had tears in her eyes as she grabbed Iida’s shoulders, shaking him back and forth. “People want us!”

Mineta reached forward, shaking Zuku. “Midoriya! You got none! I bet everyone was really grossed out by the crazy way you were fighting!”

I scowled, balling up a piece of paper and throwing it at his head. “Leave him alone, dipshit, you didn’t get any either. No one wants your perverted ass!”

“Despite these results,” Aizawa raised his voice, gaining everyone’s attention. “You’ll all be interning with pros, got it? Even though of you who didn’t get any offers.”

“Oh, so, we’re all interning?” Zuku asked in surprise.

“Yes. You already got to experience combat with real villains during the attack on the USJ facility, but it’ll still be helpful to see pros at work, up close and personal, in the field, first-hand.”

“And for that, we need hero names!”

“Things are suddenly getting a lot more fun!”

“These hero names will likely be temporary, but take them seriously or -”

The door slammed open. “You’ll have hell to pay later!” Midnight stepped into the classroom and the perv squad got stupid looks on their faces, staring at her intently. “What you pick today could be your codename for life. You’d better be careful or you’ll be stuck with something utterly indecent.”

I rolled my eyes. Does she have to sway her hips like that when she walks? Like, we get it, you have a nice fucking body and you’re proud, but at least have some decorum around your damn students, dumbass.

“Yeah, she’s got a good point.” Aizawa agreed, brow furrowing briefly. I wonder how he chose his name. Does he regret it? “Midnight is going to have final approval of your names. It’s not my forte.” He reached down, grabbing his yellow sleeping bag and stepping inside of it.

“Now wait a minute,” I scowled, leaning to the side to see around Momo. “It’s our names, why the fuck do they need to be approved? And by her, of all people. If she has her way, we’ll all have fucking lewd ass names.”

She pouted, cocking her hip and resting her wrist against it. “What kind of person do you take me for, Winchester?”

“You really want me to answer that?” I deadpanned. “Thot.”

Even though I muttered the last part under my breath, she heard me. A tic mark appeared on her temple and she launched at me, pulling me into a tight headlock. “What did you just call me, brat?!”

“Hah?! Are you going deaf, grandma?!” I struggled against her hold.

“I am not old!!”

“You’re right, I’m sorry. You’re fucking ancie – ow!!”

The class only sweatdropped as they watched us argue back and forth.

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

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📜 Read more by checking out my masterlist 📜

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linaofthemyscira · 6 years ago

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Wish Come True (Jason Todd’s Birthday 2k18)

Pairing: Jason Todd x Reader

Words: 1636

Prompt: Sort of a soulmate AU sort of not. You’ll see it’s super cute I promise ;D

Warnings: cursing, abusive boyfriends

A/N: This was super last minute I moved into my college dorm and well, had a limited amount of time to write this so here we are.

☆ ☆ ☆

The air was humid and warm the night of August 16th in Gotham City as Jason inconspicuously made his way to his safehouse. He wasn’t particularly happy about what day it was, but that didn’t stop an influx of cards from arriving at his apartment that day.

“Happy Birthday Jason!” they all read. He had shoved the cards into a drawer in his nightstand and tried to forget about them but that sentence kept coming back to him, haunting him even when he wasn’t thinking about it. It had been 4 years since he came back to Gotham, yet he still felt like celebrating his birthday was a mistake.

As he arrived, he got out his keys and unlocked the door to his safehouse, ready to crack open his case files and investigate his most recent venture: Don Falcone.

But that’s not what happened. The lights suddenly came on and he heard two voices shout at him.

“SURPRISE!” they yelled in unison.

Of course. It was Roy and Kori. Jason sighed as he shut the door behind him and walked towards his desk, dropping his bag on top.

“Jason, we are throwing you a surprise party! Are you not happy?” Kori asked.

“Yeah dude, it took us forever because the key I copied from you was having a tough time unlocking the door,” Roy explained. “The least you could do is show a little smile.”

“Guys, I appreciate it, but I’m not really feeling my birthday this year,” Jason said as he took off his shoes.

“You’ve said that every year since you came back to Gotham,” Roy stuck his hands in his pockets.

“Jason, is there something you have against birthdays?” Kori asked as she sat on his bed.

“Not birthdays, Kori. Just mine in particular,” Jason told her.

“Jaybird, it’s been nine years. You can’t hold some kind of grudge against your birthday forever,” Roy put his hand on Jason’s shoulder. Jason rubbed his face with his hands in exasperation, but he knew Roy was right. Jason didn’t even get to celebrate his 21st birthday with a big bash like he had dreamed of when he was a kid. Instead, he sat at his desk with a cupcake and a single candle and sang happy birthday to himself.

Now he was 24, and he knew it was time to view his birthday as a normal thing and not something to dread every year.

“It’s just hard, Bruce has all the fucking news channels playing some ‘In Memory of Jason Todd’ video every year for the anniversary of when I died AND my birthday. I’m getting tired of it. I’ll move on when Bruce moves on,” Jason joined Kori on the bed, laying down with his hands behind his head.

“At least have some cake to celebrate,” Kori offered.

“Fine,” Jason sat up and faced the cake that Kori brought out to him, candles and “Happy Birthday Jason” and everything. The two began singing to him, and Jason couldn’t help but smile a little when they reached “Happy Birthday Dear Jason”.

As they reached the end, Jason closed his eyes and thought about something to wish for. When he finally decided, he opened his eyes and blew out his candles in one fell swoop.

“Yay! What did you wish for?” Kori asked.

“It won’t come true if I tell you,” Jason winked, “now pass a plate, let’s eat some cake!”

The three drank beer and ate cake for a while before Roy suggested they go do something fun for Jason’s birthday.

“What, like go to a club? A bar party?” Jason asked.

“Let’s do 24 things that you want to do before you…” he began.

“Die? Again?” Jason asked.

“No, 24 things you wanted to do before you previously died. Kind of like a last farewell to the old Jason,” Roy explained.

Jason and Kori looked at each other, reluctant to go through with the idea, but they had nothing else better to do, really.

“Okay. That sounds fair. I’ll make a list of 24 things I wanted to do before I died and we ALL have to do them. No backing out,” Jason raised an eyebrow.

“I’m very excited to see what you have planned, Jason,” Kori grinned.

“Oddly, me too,” Roy said.

“Let’s do this.”

☆ ☆ ☆

“I’m fucking leaving.”

“Like hell you are.”

“Fuck off I’m DONE taking orders from you.”

Chad, your now ex-boyfriend, had done it yet again: he came home drunk and hit you, simply for taking his clothes out of the dryer.

That was the last straw. You had put up with it for long enough, and now you were ready to drop him faster than you could say the word “apple”. You had no idea why you continued dating him when you knew his abuse was wrong. Maybe it was because when things were calm, he told you what you wanted to hear. Maybe it was because when the going got tough, he comforted you.

But that wasn’t enough. He clearly didn’t respect you and you had an underlying suspicion that he was fucking other people. You couldn’t and didn’t want to take another hit. So that’s where we find you.

Packing, or angrily throwing, your belongings into your bags. You planned to stay at your best friend’s apartment until you could find your own place.

“Listen to me you bitch--” he began, but all he got was your fist connecting with his face.

“Don’t fucking call me a bitch, you shitbrick!” you yelled. Once you got the clothes you needed, you went into the living room to take what was yours.

“HEY, THAT’S MINE!” Chad screamed at you.

“IT’S MINE I PAID FOR IT!” you screamed back.

Chad unhappily watched you as you gathered the rest of your items and made your way to the door.

“I hope you enjoy your PATHETIC life as an INANE ASSHOLE!” you shouted at him before you slammed the door behind you.

As you walked down the hall, you choked back tears, refusing to show any signs of vulnerability.

Meanwhile…

☆ ☆ ☆

Jason, Kori, and Roy were skipping down the sidewalk, tipsy, giggly and without a care in the world. Jason had forgotten about all his problems and worries and was living life on his 24th birthday.

“Shhhhhh, guys, we have to be quiet, people live here,” Jason, the least tipsy of the group, shushed his friends.

“OoOoOoOh you’re right,” Kori giggled.

“Kori! Come on, baby, just shhhhhhh,” Roy slurred as he pressed a finger to her lips.

Jason laughed at his friends as he kept walking, wondering where they would go next.

Suddenly you burst out of your apartment building, heading for the curb to call a taxi, but you were so blinded by rage (and your watery eyes) that you didn’t even see Jason and crashed into him. Both of you landed on the sidewalk in a loud thump, causing Kori and Roy to look at you with wide eyes.

“Owwww,” you held your wrist.

“You’re in pain? Try having 4 bullet wounds in 4 separate locations on your body; one on each arm, one on your leg and one in your torso,” Jason absentmindedly revealed. Once he realized that you were a stranger and not someone who knew who he really was, he mentally cursed at himself.

“What? Are you some kind of assassin? Why would you have...four bullet wounds?” you winced as you tried to move your wrist, but it was still hurting.

“Got caught in the crossfire of a street fight, don’t worry about it,” he got up and rubbed his arm. You got up after him, holding your wrist. The two of you stood in silence, not looking at each other to avoid any awkwardness.

After a few minutes, the both of you finally made eye contact, and everything changed. The familiarity of Jason flooded your brain, as did the familiarity of you flood his brain. Something about him made you feel safe and relaxed like he could take care of you in the worst moments of your life.

As for Jason, he couldn’t help but be a little freaked out. He hadn’t figured that it would actually happen, but it did and he was slightly terrified of what that meant. But maybe it was a sign, maybe this was supposed to happen. Perhaps, it was fate you would meet. Everything was finally falling into place.

“Are you okay?” he asked you.

“I-I’m fine. My wrist hurts but I’m sure my friend has an ice-pack at her apartment,” you shrugged.

“You--you don’t live with your best friend?” Jason asked.

“No, I used to live with my ex-boyfriend, but that piece of shit couldn’t channel his anger properly so...we’re over,” you told the stranger.

“You mean he...he hit you?” Jason was getting increasingly angry. You nodded in shame.

“I’m sorry...um…” Jason paused for your name.

“[Y/N],” you told him.

“I’m sorry, [Y/N]. No one should be abused like that. Ever. Why don’t you come back to my place? You can rest there for the night,” Jason offered. “I just met you.” was what you wanted to say, but you felt like you had known Jason for a hundred years. There was something trustworthy about him, so you decided to accept.

“Sure. Thank you…” you paused for his name.

“Jason,” he replied.

“Jason. Thank you, Jason,” you told him. Jason picked up your bags and told Kori and Roy that he was going to go back home with you and that they could pick their adventure later. The two reluctantly agreed and started their own journey home.

As Jason escorted you back to his apartment, he found himself thinking about one thing: how his wish to find someone who could change his life came true.

☆ ☆ ☆

TAGGING:

Master/Permanent:

@ladyalexa @impulsivesuperrobin @batarangtotheheart @little-lesbean-queen @where-is-my-jason-todd @makeup-wonder-woman @jasontoddandhisguns @dick-graysns @solis200213 @books-netflix-and-pizza @dramatic-and-young @ioczurma @sarcasmismyfirstlove @food-flowers-friends @princessonly2 @the--iceberg--lounge @timsflannels @breadhoods @imaginingadifferentlife @letmestargaze36 @san-penedo @spacedragonsattack @spiderling-tom @redhoodsdoll @hmushkova

Jason:

@bvckysmanbun @starryrevelations @sonoflac @boosyboo9206 @thegeekwhocantwrite @jason-todd-rh @southsidefandoms @jaydinnelisee @dc-hoe

#Jason Todd #jason todd x reader #happy birthday jason!#jason todd birthday week #red hood

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hocats-blog · 6 years ago

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7 Lord of the Rings Fan Theories to Rule Them All

As you probably remember, Gollum wasn't always Gollum. For a time he was Smeagol, a Hobbit quickly corrupted by the power of the One Ring. It was his "precious" that afforded him an extraordinarily long life, and warped him into the scrappy half-naked mangoblin that becomes the bane of Frodo and Sam. Though he's been Gollum far longer than he was Smeagol, at times there seems to be a war of identities going on within the sad creature. We assume that the centuries he's spent under the ring's influence has created this rift within the character, but that might not be the case at all. One intriguing fan theory claims that Gollum is actually a personality inside the ring, an entity that can possess anyone. The identity isn't unique to Smeagol, meaning that if someone like Aragorn held it long enough, he'd turn into a pasty diaper-wearing wretch just the same as you would. Think about those we know who have held the ring for an extended period of time. Right off the bat, there's Bilbo Baggins. He seemed relatively chill about the ring and managed to hold onto it for years without going nanners, but we definitely saw some cracks forming in his psyche when Gandalf came to town. Bilbo was less than thrilled about having his "precious" taken away. That, right there -- Bilbo unconsciously "gollum'd." That's the "Gollum personality" breaking through, its infection spreading within Bilbo. The possession gets a bit more overt later on during a conversation with Frodo, at which point Bilbo's face makes a hellish transformation. Looks a lot like Gollum, doesn't it? Bilbo doesn't just call the ring his "precious" just because he heard Gollum say that -- that's actually Gollum talking through Bilbo. For more proof, we have to look no further than Isildur. Remember Isildur is the one who lopped Sauron's fingers off and took the ring? Isildur is also the same shitbrick who, given the chance, didn't toss the ring into the fires of Mount Doom. Instead, he wore it around his neck, which is more or less the Middle-earth equivalent of treating a nuclear warhead like a piece of bling. The corrosive power eventually killed Isildur, but not before he wrote about the ring in a series of creepy journals. Gandalf discovered these writings, and found one particularly disturbing passage. Could it really be a coincidence that a dude who lived thousands of years before Smeagol would used the same word to describe the One Ring? Probably not. It seems a lot more likely that Gollum is a personality inside the ring that infects its host and possesses them to protect the ring and do Sauron's bidding. If Isildur's hubris hadn't ended him, it may well have been his wispy form that Bilbo came across on his initial adventure in The Hobbit. Now, the name "Gollum" is merely the name given to Smeagol after his neighors kept seeing him hacking up a lung every day, so it's probably not the actual title of the deity inside the ring. But the name "Gollum" has significance, in that it's pretty close to "golem," the mythological creature which is made of inanimate materials, but given life from an outside force. It's a compelling theory not because it dramatically changes the story, but because it gives you a new perspective on what the ringbearers must have been going through. That, and it's fun imagining a crazed Viggo Mortensen wearing a diaper.

This is a stupid idea. No one's going to actually come out and say that J.R.R. Tolkien created Albus Dumbledore and the world of Harry Potter. But it's a testament to the strength of fan theories that some beautiful bastard could come up with a convincing explanation that links Hogwarts and Middle-earth. It all relies on the fact that there are five Istari -- better known as "wizards" to people who have seen the sun in the last two weeks -- in the realm of this fiction. You probably already know three of them: Gandalf the Grey, Saruman the White and Radagast "That Forest Hippie Who Refuses to Clean the Birdshit Out of His Beard" the Brown. The missing pieces of this magical grandpa pie are the two "Blue Wizards," which Tolkien glossed over briefly but never really followed up on. Last we heard, they were sent into Mordor to quell the threat of Sauron. They weren't seen again, but there's also no explicit mention of their deaths. The two blue wizards could be anyone, which is why it's entirely possible that they are in fact Albus Dumbledore and his nemesis/boytoy Gellen Grindelwald. All it would take is a temporal or multidimensional mishap, and they'd be in the modern world of muggles. How they got to Earth from Middle-earth isn't as important as the thematical connections. Dumbledore says that "It is important to fight, and fight again, and keep fighting, for only then can evil be kept at bay, though never quite eradicated." Meaning that he wasn't going to give up once Sauron was down for the count. Though Grindelwald fell to the "dark side" like Saruman before him, Dumbledore kept up the fight and was eventually upgraded from "Dumbledore the Blue" to "Dumbledore the White." It fits, especially because in Latin, "Albus" literally translates to "white." It makes sense that Dumbledore took the job at Hogwarts, as that was the place he could best mount his defense of the world. Once there, he builds an army of wizards to do just that. And yet, he still remembers where he came from, which explains why there's a portrait of Gandalf the Grey hanging in Dumbledore's office. Dumbledore had already assembled his wizard defense force, so he passed off into the undying lands in the most fantastical way possible. The entire theory sheds new light on Dumbledore's words: "Ah, music. A magic far beyond all we do here!" As it so happens, the world of Middle-earth was created via song by the Illuvatar. Did J.K. Rowling write Dumbledore with Tolkien's lost wizards in mind? It's not impossible, but it's probably unlikely. It doesn't matter, because veracity isn't the point of this fan theory. The real strength of this tangled yarn is just how creative it is in weaving two disparate but similar fictions together. These two worlds don't exist anyway, so why can't they they exist in the same place?

Though it's not featured in a big way in the films, the books go into a little more detail about the death of Frodo's parents. Drogo and Primula Baggins drowning during a freak boating accident is tragic, but storywise, it gives Frodo less of a reason to be tied down to the Shire. But one fan theory suggests there's a darker undercurrent to this story, that Frodo's parents were in fact murdered. The culprit: Gollum. We all know that creepazoid is capable of murder. It's arguably the first thing Smeagol ever did as Gollum. After the events of the Hobbit, Gollum set about finding the his precious stolen ring. Problem was, Gollum really only had two things to go on when it came to finding the ring: "Baggins" and "Shire." It's not out of the question that he might come across the Brandywine River on his quest, and he would certainly kill any Bagginses he found there. The theory is propped up by the questionable circumstances of the deaths. There seems to be a question among the Hobbits as to just how Frodo's parents passed. Whatever the case, both Drogo and Primula were pretty experienced boaters, so it's more than a little surprising that they would just fall in the water and die. No, it makes more sense that an angry Gollum murdered them straight out, giving up on his mission once he found nothing on their person. The only real damper on this theory is Gandalf, who claims that Gollum never made it to the Brandywine. That would seem to put an end to this theory, but put yourself in Gandalf's old man shoes for a minute. You're talking to Frodo, the guy who is going to lug the world's most dangerous weapon across a continent, and he's pretty fragile as it is. Now imagine if Gandalf decided to tell Frodo that the same guy who guides him through Mordor is the one that deprived him of his parents -- he'd undoubtedly lose himself to rage at some point, and as a result succumb to the power of the ring itself. If Gandalf hadn't pulled off an Obi-Wan-tier lie, our story would be over before it began. To be fair, at least that one ending is preferable to like seventy.

This almost feels like cheating. This "fan theory" is so perfect, fits so well into the mythos of the series that it's basically canon. But that's exactly the reason it can't be ignored. Just after the Fellowship is formed, the angelic Lady Galadriel offers each member of the group a special gift. Legolas got a rad new bow, Pippin and Merry each received sweet daggers, and Boromir was bestowed with a tacky gold belt that did not go with his bracers. The most interesting gift was that given to Gimli, the dwarf. While most others just took what was handed to them, Galadriel actually asked Gimli what he wanted from the elves. After a bit of stammering, Gimli gave in and requested his greatest desire. Others were naturally curious about this mystery gift. Asking for (and actually GETTING) a strand of Galadriel's hair might sound creepy, but it's really a huge deal. To explain why, we have to rewind a few thousand years. Several millennia before the War of the Ring, there was this shitbird named Feanor. Now, Feanor is a grade-A dickweed, but even he can see how lovely Galadriel is. As the legend has it, Feanor too asked for a single strand of Galadriel's hair, but he was denied. Twice more Feanor made the same request, and twice more he was shut down. Dude wasn't worthy of Galadriel's crusty toenail clippings, much less her luscious locks. Flash forward to the Fellowship, and Gimli's wish for a strand of Galadriel's flawless hair is granted threefold. Though Gimli is likely oblivious to the significance of the gesture, Legolas' smile tells us he understands. Up to this point, dwarves and elves had an uneasy relationship, like co-workers that hate each other but stay cool because they have to be in close proximity every day. But Galadriel saw the innate goodness in Gimli, and rewarded him thrice over. You can almost hear Feanor grumbling "It still only counts as one."

#the lord of the rings #lord of the rings #the hobbit #reviewbooks #reviews

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themusingsofacurlyhairednerd · 8 years ago

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All My Friends Are Heathens; Part 9

{ Part 8 }

{ Master List }

Summary: Octavia attempts to get the gang to start their own society in the woods in order to ditch school, Lincoln spills the beans about Bellamy having a date, cars are stolen, Clarke’s failing at being the Mom-friend... the usual delinquent nonsense ;)

*Delinquent group chat*

TheSuperiorBlake: who wants to abandon all adult responsibilities and create a Amazonian-like society in the woods with me??

i-make-it-go-boom: is this a Wonder Woman scenario where no men are invited BECAUSE SIGN ME TF UP

Murphy is getting on my last nerve

Jaaaaaasssssppper: Wonder Woman was a spiritual experience, I’ll dress in drag and do the hula if you let me in

Guns&Roses: Make him do the truffle shuffle

TrashPrince: U FALL ASLEEP THROUGH ONE SKYPE CALL AND SUDDENLY UR RELATIONSHIP IS ON THE ROCKS

Trikru: OCTAVIA MY LOVE MY LIFE YOU WOULD LEAVE ME??? WHAT HAPPENED TO FOREVER? OUR HAPPY ENDING?? :’( :’(

MillertheKiller: Lincoln, babe, don’t cry

I’ll be ur boo

TheSuperiorBlake: paws off Miller!!!

NurseGriffin: I’m listening

Greenbean: BELL UR GIRL IS TRYING TO LEAVE U OCTAVIA IS BREAKING UP OUR FAMILY

TheSuperiorBlake: everyone is invited you meatheads I just don’t want to study

Jaaaaaasssssppper: Cool cool

is booze involved then?

HeadbandWonder: ah come on! I don’t want to share a tent with anyone that smells like a gym locker :’(

NurseClarke: Guess we’re all sharing a tent with Bellamy ‘cause the rest of u guys smell like old socks

Bellamy smells like a forest after a light rain <3

TheSuperiorBlake: that’s oddly specific

MillertheKiller: Speaking of the freckled wonder... r shirts optional? Bellamy has abs that need to be appreciated

Trikru: that’s Clarke’s job

Iliad: Listen you toadstools I’m in the middle of a meeting

If you’re going to compliment my physique at least wait until I’m available to appreciate the praise

Jaaaaaasssssppper: I vote to kick Bellamy out of our Amazon club he uses too many big words

TrashPrince: Seconded

Trikru: He can’t join anyway

He’s too busy with his new beau ;)

Greenbean: DAD HOW COULD U CHEAT ON MOM LIKE THIS???

Guns&Roses: WAIT IT’S NOT CLARKE?????????????

MOM SAY IT ISN’T SO????????????

Jaaaaassssppper: UR TEARING THIS FAMILY A PART U MONSTER

TrashPrince: I’M THE GARBAGE CAN OF THIS FAMILY YOU CAN’T JUST WALTZ IN AND TAKE MY PLACE LIKE THIS!!!

TheSuperiorBlake: IF IT’S THAT TRICK ASS BITCH ECHO AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL MAKE THAT PIECE OF SHIT DISAPPEAR

Iliad:

Meeting!!!!!!!!!

i-make-it-go-boom: Mom did u know about this???

Greenbean: r u sad?

Jasper and I will make u brownies

And give u hugs

Jaaaaaasssssppper: we’ll wrap u in blankets and take care of u mom UNLIKE SMELLAMY YOU SHITBRICK

NurseGriffin: guys I’m fine

TrashPrince: LIES

TheSuperiorBlake: u guys leave her alone

She’s in the first step of recovery: Denial

NurseGriffin: I’m not in denial you meatheads

MillertheKiller: only someone in denial would say that

TrashPrince: As someone who has gone to therapy several times, I can say with all authority that mommy dearest is indeed in denial

i-make-it-go-boom: as a certified mechanic, I’m obligated to fix this AND FIX IT I SHALL

BELLAMY BRADBURY BLAKE GET UR EFFECTS IN ORDER BECAUSE I’M ABOUT TO BITCH SLAP UR SORRY ASS INTO NEXT YEAR!!

TrashPrince: GRAB UR PITCHFORKS MEN

MillertheKiller: I’LL LIGHT THE TORCHES

Jaaaaaassssppper: LET’S KILL THE BEAST!

Greenbean: wut?

Jaaaaassssppper: I thought we were quoting that beauty and the beast song

i-make-it-go-boom: I GET TO BE THE ONE WHO BREAKS DOWN THE DOOR WITH A BATTERING RAM!!

TheSuperiorBlake: this convo really got away from me

TrashPrince: #knockbellamyintonextyear2k17

Guns&Roses: FOR NARNIA AND CLARKE’S HONOR

HeadbandWonder: let’s hit him where it hurts!!

TrashPrince: I’m suggesting a mob and all u want to do is kick him in the junk?? UR uninvited from our mob Harper

HeadbandWonder: I MEANT THE LIBRARY THE TRUE LOVE OF HIS LIFE U DONUTHOLE

TrashPrince: fine ur re-invited BUT UR ON THIN ICE

*Operation Fake Out*

NurseGriffin: listen i know you’re in a meeting and everything, but we should probs tell them we’re “dating” before they kill you

Iliad: Oh I’m not actually in a meeting

I went to get us coffee, I was gonna stop by your house and surprise you, but I didn’t realize until I got there that I left my wallet back at the library. -_-

I just said I was in a meeting so I didn’t have to respond to their idiocy

NurseGriffin: awwwwwwww!! <3 who’s the best fake bf ever?

Iliad: Chris Evans probably

Any of the Chris’s really

But I’ll happily take second place ;)

Anyway... once I get my wallet I’ll bring you coffee and we can talk about when we’re going to let them “catch” us on a date.

NurseGriffin: Just make it fast, Murphy’s trying to start a mob

Iliad: Copy that, Princess

*Delinquents*

Trikru: u know what would be more fun than a mob?? Inviting Bellamy and his gf to dinner so we can get to know them

i-make-it-go-boom: pass

MillertheKiller: hard pass

besides I already broke the driver’s side window on bellamy’s rover

NurseGriffin: U WHAT?????

TrashPrince: WE MUST DEFEND CLARKE’S HONOR

MillertheKiller: Can’t talk I’ve stolen the rover Bellamy can’t escape

GET HIM BOYS AND BADASS LADIES WHO GENUINELY TERRIFY ME

TheSuperiorBlake: Miller is the leader our amazon society doesn’t deserve but desperately needs

TrashPrince: NOT ALL HEROES WEAR CAPES

NurseGriffin: pls tell me this isn’t real

i-make-it-go-boom: come pick me up!! I’ll repaint it and change the plates so the cops can’t find it

Jaaaaaaasssssppper: Monty and I will wipe away all fingerprints

But within a month will have to ditch the car at the Mexican border, change our names, and start brand new lives in Canada from here on out you will call me Reginald!!

Guns&Roses: I want to be Harper

TheSuperiorBlake: I call dibs on being Murphy I’ve always wanted to be a sarcastic asshole with no concern for anyone’s feelings

TrashPrince: u r a sarcastic asshole with no concern for anyone’s feelings

TheSuperiorBlake: feeling real attacked right now

Trikru: square up Murphy

NurseGriffin: listen here children of Satan

Jaaaaaaaassssppper: rude

TrashPrince: fair

NurseGriffin: Being Bellamy's car back and leave money for the broken window in the glove box OR SO HELP ME I WILL CALL ALL OF YOUR MOTHERS

TheSuperiorBlake: jokes on u I don't have a mother

Guns&Roses: this just got real sad real quick

NurseGriffin: don't bullshit me Octavia Blake

We all know Indra is ur step-mother

TheSuperiorBlake: INDRA IS MY BADASS FAIRY GODMOTHER WHO TURNED ME INTO A KICKASS WARRIOR PRINCESS WHO DOMINATES THE SOCCER FIELD UNDEFEATED U COW I WONT STAND HERE AND WATCH HER BE DISRESPECTED LIKE THIS

NurseGriffin: GIVE BELLAMY BACK HIS CAR

MillertheKiller: NOT UNTIL U ADMIT U LOVE HIM

Greenbean: speaking of the freckled wonder...

He's taking this rather well

TrashPrince: Doubtful

He probably had a heart attack in the middle of his meeting He's probably being resuscitated as we speak

*Operation Fake Out*

NurseGriffin: Bellamy, the platonic love of my life

U beautiful cinnamon roll

my pseudo lover

Iliad: Is this about my rover?

NurseGriffin: Oh so u are still getting the group messages?

Iliad: Getting them? I crawled into the back of my car to grab a book I needed to return while I was back at the library and APPARENTLY MILLER DIDN’T SEE ME AND HAS STOLEN MY CAR WITH ME IN IT!!

NurseGriffin: OMG

FOR REAL??

Iliad: No I just like being a drama queen

OF COURSE I’M FOR RHDKWNFIJINWIFJUP

sorry, I hit my head on the seat when miller hit a speed bump

NurseGriffin: I’m calling Kane

Iliad: Please don’t. I don’t want to have to explain why Miller’s blood is all over my car.

NurseGriffin: Bellamy I love you, but I’m not waiting for you to get out of prison if you murder Nathan.

Iliad: After all we’ve been through??

I’m hurt Clarke

NurseGriffin: Our fake relationship is not built to survive prison

Iliad: You’re supposed to be my ride of die!

NurseGriffin: ur about to die riding in your stolen car without a seat belt

*IceIceBaby direct messaged Iliad*

IceIceBaby: why is ur car speeding through the school parking lot like it’s a Fast & Furious moment?

AND WHY WASN’T I INVITED TO RUN FROM CAMPUS SECURITY IN THIS EPIC MOMENT DUDE!!

Iliad: because i’m not driving my car

IceIceBaby: damn dude

ur missing out then

I’ll put the video on facebook for u

Iliad: my hero -_-

*Operation Fake Out*

Iliad: Clarke listen

Miller is driving my car so fast I can hear pieces falling off

Campus security has been chasing us for eight blocks

The entire Arkadia police force is probably gonna be here any second with a helicopter and I will inevitably be shot out the windshield like a rocket in the next few minutes

So in case I go out like a human bullet, there’s something I gotta tell you

NurseGriffin: Is this about the time u cheated off me in math?

Iliad: That never happened

And if it did, I wouldn’t waste my final breath on it

I’ll pay for that *hypothetical* sin in the afterlife

Iliad: I really didn’t want to tell you like this

I had it all planned you know

We were gonna go to the botanical garden and I was going to sit you down in a secluded little spot and tell you... which sounds kind of cliche now that I’m saying it.

I don’t know, I guess I always pictured it surrounded by flowers so I could tell you they didn’t compare to you

NurseGriffin: what’s happening right now?

Are you proposing to me?

Iliad: Clarke I’m in love with you

For real

I kinda, sorta, suggested the fake date thing so you’d see I could be a good boyfriend and maybe, you know, wanna date for real.

NurseGriffin: u tried to trick me into dating u??

Iliad: Not mfhrnedifnrkfkj

NurseGriffin: O MY GOD BELLAMY ARE YOU OKAY????

BELLAMY??

*Delinquents*

MillertheKiller: ABORT MISSION

ABORT MISSION

OH MY GOD I’M GOING TO DIE

SAVE YOURSELVES!!!!!

TheSuperiorBlake: what’s happening?

Iliad: MILLER DROVE MY FREAKING CAR INTO A POLE TO AVOID CAMPUS SECURITY

WHILE I WAS IN THE BACKSEAT

HE’S NOW RUNNING DOWN THE BLOCK SCREAMING

HE HAS 5 SECONDS BEFORE I TEAR HIM LIMB FROM LIMB

maybe a little longer, I hit my head really hard and then threw up climbing out the back window

NurseGriffin: why aren’t u answering my texts u jackass???!!!

i thought u were dead!!!

u can’t just tell me u love me and then not respond to my texts!!!

Greenbean: BELLAMY TOLD U HE LOVES U????

Guns&Roses: wait, but aren’t u dating someone new???

Trikru: i was trying to tell u that he was going out with clarke but NO ONE WAS LISTENING!!

TheSuperiorBlake: YOU KNEW AND DIDN’T TELL ME???

Trikru: i mean he never actually admitted anything but i had my suspicions

TheSuperiorBlake: all the guys minus jasper and monty are uninvited from the Amazon society

Lincoln especially

TrashPrince: WHAT DID I DO??

TheSuperiorBlake: i don’t know

and i don’t care

NurseGriffin: guy!!! not now!

Bellamy are u ok?

Iliad: i can smell colors

everything tastes like blood

NurseGriffin: where are u? I’m coming to get u

Iliad: don’t know

everything is spinning

MillertheKiller: two miles outside of Arkadia

can u get me too?

NurseGriffin: walk u cretin!!

u almost killed Bellamy

this is ur punishment

NurseGriffin: Bellamy stay where u are! I’m coming to get u!

Iliad: oh is it time for our coffee date already?

NurseGriffin: no ur going to the hospital

Iliad: not as fun but probably for the best

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