#myfavouritemovie
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lauren-cherryfield · 5 years ago
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Sophie: Howl I am sure I could be of help to you. Even though i am not pretty... and all I'm good at is cleaning. Howl: Sophie. You're beautiful. . Do you know that in the books Sophie was able to make the objects she created alive and own personality? If you haven't read the books yet I recommend them 100%. This is a redraw of an #illustration i did 3 years ago. If you slide until the end you will see the comparison. Which one do you like the most? I can see how much my style and skills have developed in three years. (I miss to have a blog to talk about these things long and not boring ppl here). . . #artislove #art #artist #artoftheday #illustrations #illustrationoftheday #illust #traditionalart #traditionalpainting #drawthisagain #ghibli #studioghibli #howlsmovingcastle #calcifer #watercolour #watercolor #acuarela #aquarelle #myfavouritemovie . Thanks to the lovely @catunje_mtg who donated me few coffees to buy an #archespaper hot press block. https://www.instagram.com/p/B9CrW5qK9I0/?igshid=izy56h4s0blg
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helloresumeme-blog · 5 years ago
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It is no secret that bullying and social issues are problematic, at school, on social media, at home and in the workplace.
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So why does it happen and how do you deal with it?
The workplace is like our second home, so we should respect it and those in it.
So why is it that people in the workplace are so mean?
It is no secret that bullying and social issue are problematic, at school, on social media, at home and in the workplace.
Given we spend so many hours of our life in our work space, we not only need social interaction to survive, we also need to be happy and to feel valued. When we experience social issues like bullying and exclusion for an extended time, this can lead to complex mental health issues amongst other things.
When you are placed in a work space, you don’t get to choose who you work with. So, you are spending almost 40 hours a week with people who you have to co-operate with.
There are varying reasons for why people at work can be mean, and underlying issues to explain their behaviour.
STAFF IN THE WORKPLACE
Social Comparison.
Cliques.
Territory.
Personality clash.
Many years ago, when I was 16 years old, I attended a school that catered to both adults and adolescents. I was enrolled into the adult section, repeating year 11. There was a 21 year old girl, who learned that I was working at her local Woolworths on the register. For reasons unknown to me, she would regularly come in and taunt me.
As a teen, I assumed that when you become an adult, you mature. But this is not our reality.
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SOCIAL COMPARISON
According to Psychologist Leon Festinger.“
Human beings have the drive to assess their opinions and to know more about their abilities and when they are incapable of evaluating their opinions and abilities, they tend to compare themselves with others.
Active downward comparison happens when a person compares himself with others by demeaning or causing harm to them. By derogating the target or causing harm to him, this person generates a situation in which the target is worse off than him, therefore giving him the chance to make a downward comparison.”
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When someone says something cruel to bring another person down, their ultimate goal is to make that person feel insecure.
For the girl who would taunt me, she had decided that there was something about me that threatened her. She had her own insecurities to battle with, so it made her feel better believing she could break me down.
And in case you are wondering, it did not work.
Eventually, she gave up.
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In the working environment, we have a lot to prove. When you look around, you see people doing things with what seems to be
‘complete ease.’
For example, a girl I used to work with was an extremely fast typer, so she was able to complete her admin work much faster than I. People have skills and qualities that you don’t have, but vice versa. So, what happens is, we tend to compare. And for some people, this can feel threatening.
When we compare, we do 1 of 3 things.
Accept that they have something we don’t and focus on our own skills.
Be inspired and try to improve upon that skill.
Resent them for having something we don’t.
Question
: What do you do when you can see someone else is progressing further along than you because they are stronger in this skill?
I want to leave you with something on this particular point. When my son and niece were both about 4 years old, my sister and I took them to a mums and Bubs music group.
As we were playing a game where a child would get chosen to “hold the puppets”, my niece desperately wanted to be chosen but wasn't. I saw my sister quietly say to her, “when someone else gets chosen, you should cheer them on”. Her message here was...
"Build others up and celebrate their successes as they happen."
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CLIQUES
A clique is a small close-knit group of people who do not readily allow others to join them.
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To feel included and a part of something, requires social interaction.
A social group
is formed by fellow colleagues chatting in the workplace and everyone is welcome to join.
A clique
is a group of people who stick to that group and rarely, others receive invites or acknowledgement from those within the clique.
Usually, there is a leader and how this leader thinks and behaves will potentially influence the others in the clique. So, if the leader is somewhat of a mean girl, the others will generally follow.
The problem with cliques are, for those who are not in them may experience exclusion and isolation, and maybe some workplace bullying.
So what happens when the leader is your manager?
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Horrible bosses much?
I once witnessed a manager telling her team about a staff member who had called in sick. Our manager didn't believe the employee’s reason and discussed this opinion with her team, giving the girl a bad reputation.
Heres a thought, If she had said nothing, people within the team probably wouldn’t have given it a second thought.
Managers are to manage the team as a whole and individually. So when it comes to personal matters, this should stay between the manager and the individual. This was the moment where I lost confidence and trust in her.
My point here is, my manager was the leader of this clique and those who were not a part of it were gossiped about and spoken down to.
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So how do you manage people like this?
The issue is their behaviour and beliefs, not them as people.  Although it can be really hard to, separating the 2, may help you navigate this much more easily.
Another consideration is to not always assume the worst. Expect that people will let you down, but don’t assume they will.
Option #1
Why not try getting to know them individually. Separating one from the herd can open doors for change.
Option #2 
Step up and ask why they behave this way. Put them on the spot. Even if it’s your boss. Why this works is because they won't be expecting it. The element of surprise is quite effective.
Option #3 
Take it to the boss. They have a responsibility to ensure each staff member is treated with respect. Even if your boss is close friends with them, do it anyway. They are your boss first and foremost.
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TERRITORY
Those who welcome others are true role models.
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I have a Labrador, she is very playful and great with kids and other dogs. I wanted to take her to my friends place, but decided against it because she has a Rottweiler, who is very territorial.
When we feel secure in a space, it can be confronting and intimidating to have someone else come into that space. I am not saying we are like dogs, but I am saying, there are some emotional and protective similarities.
With kids, its their toys or bedroom. With adults, it’s our work space or home. We like familiarity, and something unfamiliar can make us feel uncomfortable. Some people have the ability to embrace this, but others don’t.
So, when a new staff member enters a workplace, certain people may respond in a negative way toward that person. They may need for others to gain their trust before they let their guard down. This type of person is very territorial. They earned their place there and expect, like a rookie, others should to.
_________________________
So how do you manage people like this?
I believe it is important to allow them the time to get to know you. Don’t hold it against them that this is how they deal with change. Be exactly who you are and do your job well. Focus on your work and learning the ropes. Eventually, by doing this, you will potentially gain their trust and be accepted into friendship with them.
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PERSONALITY CLASH
Sometimes, it is simply because they just don’t like you. We can't be liked by everyone, even though it does seem as though there are people out there who are loved by all, this is not possible.
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We all have annoying traits, and some more than others, so when people are irritated but someone, they may tend to be pretty obvious about this.
A close friend of mine, Hayley, has a very outgoing personality, a great sense of humour, beautiful heart and is very loud. She never hides who she is, so when you meet her, you know exactly who you are getting to know.
She worked with a girl who would say nasty things to her, not because Hayley had done anything in particular to intentionally upset her, but simply because she didn't like how loud she was.
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Why did this bother her so much?
I believe there was an element of envy here. When someone is drawing attention to themselves, others are likely to stay in the shadows. Also, it can be tough for someone who is introverted to be spontaneous and outgoing. These people may need to do some soul searching.
At the end of the day, we don’t change our personalities so as everyone likes us, we be who we are and if people can't accept this, then tough bickies, that's on them.
_________________________
So how do you manage people like this?
Honestly, you don’t. You can't change other people, but you can only control how you respond. Continue being who you are, so long as you are doing it with integrity. So, if you are loud, that's okay, but don’t do it so as to annoy that person. If you are talkative, don’t antagonise them by talking to them a lot. Say hello and make small talk, but keep it to the minimum.
Showing kindness despite whether or not someone likes you is the best approach. You are then not giving them reason not to like you.
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Why are bosses mean?
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HORRIBLE BOSSES 
Lack of self awareness.
Denial & Culture.
Stress.
Misunderstanding.
Power.
_____________________________
LACK OF EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
Emotional intelligence is a combination of self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy and social skill.
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As leaders, It is our responsibility to set an example. When we behave badly, we are setting a tone for our team that certain behaviours are acceptable. So, the second I see my manager gossiping with their staff about other staff, or humiliating them in front of others, I instantly lose a level of trust and respect for them.
When I was working for a medical clinic many moons ago, The office practice manager was renowned for her gossip in the workplace across her team. Every staff member knew and expected no less from her.
One day, a colleague took offence to something I had said which was in no way intended to upset her. A patient had a voicemail left by someone from our clinic and when I listened to it, I recognised my colleagues’ voice. The patient did not understand why this message had been left as it only requested for her to call back.
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So, I asked my colleague what she was needing to talk to them about. She became angry with me accusing me of being wrong. I explained that I had heard her voice on the message service and that the patient was on the phone waiting to speak with her as requested.
She raised her voice at me and behaved quite irrational, saying that it is not possible for me to know it is her. Clearly, I had struck a nerve. I decided to end the conversation and advised the patient it must have been an error.
A day later, our practice manager approached me about the matter. What I found to be odd was her message behind what she said. She was talking to me about conflict in the workplace.
I found this to be quite ironic, mainly because she was in no way an example of someone who had an ability to resolve conflict or nurture healthy relationships with those around her.
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The point I am making here is, when Managers behave poorly, it makes it very hard for their staff to see them as a leader. Nothing she said resinated with me because my focus was on her hypocrisy.
My boss lacked all of the qualities that made up emotional intelligence. She didn't realise that many staff submitted to her out of intimidation, or that her team perceived her as a dishonest and disloyal manager.
Is your manager actually being mean by gossiping about you or publicly humiliating you by pointing out a mistake you made?
YES! Let’s turn the question around. Is it nice to spread gossip about someone? Is it nice to belittle someone in public?
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So how do you manage a manager who behaves this way? If I had my time again, I would do this.
Sit them down and let them know that what they are doing is not something you will accept. You are an individual who has a right to feel empowered in the workplace and free from bullying and slander.
If you are worried about making your work environment harder for yourself, then ask yourself, is it not hard already? Would you see yourself staying for the next 5–10 years being treated this way?
By standing up for yourself you could potentially make things better, maybe there could be a future for you there.
If you are worried about losing your job, and you decide not to address the issue because of this, then it may be worth looking for another job. In saying this, consider that it could be the same in the next joint. You can't predict this, neither can you predict whether or not good can come from addressing the issue where you currently are.
You may save yourself a lot of time and energy searching for a new job simply by giving it a crack and fronting up to your manager.
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DENIAL & CULTURE
Respect is never gained by pushing others around.
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When I was 18 years old, I was working at a Gloria Jeans Cafe in Brisbane. The Manager there would yell and swear at her staff, me included.
She even received a complaint from a customer saying she frightened her and will never return again.
One day at work, I had just topped up the beans, both the normal and decaf. My manager didn't trust that I had done it correctly, so she took a handful of each and put her hands out in front of me. She then asked me which was which.
Now, this may seem like a normal and calm situation, but it wasn't. She was angry. I found this quite intimidating and therefore was unable to think clearly. So, I just kept staring at her hands. Finally someone outside the situation stepped in and answered the question. This ended it for me.
This form of behaviour is actually quite common across many work places. The biggest issue is that yelling and swearing in the workplace is not illegal, so unless Human Resources resolve the issue, there are not too many options available.
Did you know these behaviours have names?
Bullying, emotional abuse, psychological torture, verbal abuse in the workplace.
So, why do bosses behave this way?
I recall my manager saying to me one day that her bosses treated her this way when they managed the store. So, was this her way of excusing her behaviour and making it okay?
I believe she recognised that it was wrong, but I also believe she didn't know how not to do it. So, it was easier for her to live in denial and find excuses to make it acceptable.
The trouble is, her team one by one quit. Many of her staff were young girls who would tense up at the sound of her voice being raised. They would silently and subtly cry hoping she wouldn’t notice.
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STRESS
Work-related mental health conditions AKA psychological injuries, have become a major concern in Australian workplaces.
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How much can one person really take on?
I have seen managers makes so many mistakes and absolutely lose it, simply because they are under a lot of pressure.
If your manager is under a lot of pressure and they are behaving terribly because of this, maybe it’s worth gently letting them know. I would not recommend talking to their superior about it unless you have already tried to address it with your direct manager and they were unwilling to listen.
It is not just you at risk, it is your manager, the company and the team who suffers.
Why it’s important to go to your manager first is, they may be the kindest person in the world when not stressed. They may just need to have it pointed out to them the impact on the team.
They may not be aware of the extent of the problem, or they may even have things going on in their personal life in addition. Who knows if your boss just had their husband or wife leave them that morning.
I am not saying their behaviour is acceptable, but there is a way around addressing it by bringing the issues to light and supporting them at the same time.
Sometimes managers too, need support. Yes, they are our leaders, but they are human beings who rarely get the recognition they deserve. In fact, they are more likely to be criticised than complimented.
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MISUNDERSTANDING
To be slow to react takes strength and wisdom.
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Misunderstandings happen all the time, I would even be inclined to say nearly on the daily. The biggest issue with misunderstandings is, sometimes there are no opportunities to clear them up. Like a misunderstanding with a stranger who you never see again.
They can also lead to major problems, like mistakes at work or office conflict that never gets resolved.
When I began working for a company many years ago, my manager failed to train me on certain things. She ran the show quite differently to other managers. 6 months later, I was transferred to another site, and my new manager noticed that I didn't know as much as I should have.
I copped a lot of flack from her and other staff until finally, we had conversation that helped her realise I had not been told or taught certain things.
This was a defining moment for both of us. Not only did it improve our relationship but it also improved our work life. By learning this, she began to teach me things I didn't know and found that I was actually a pretty good employee. But had she not learned the underlying issue, I would have eventually left.
If you notice your boss is behaving unkind or frustrated toward you, maybe just ask them why. Who knows what information might come to light.
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POWER
Power is to be used for good, not evil.
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I am going to share a little story again, this one i’ll never forget. Earlier I mentioned I was working at a Gloria Jeans Cafe. The Manager set the tone for the Shift Supervisors that they can behave just as poorly.
One shift supervisor, Hannah, was regularly on a power trip. Her issue was that she not only gained no respect from the team but she positioned herself in a place only to be made fun of.
It was getting late in the day and Hannah was checking in that everything was being completed for closing, so she turned to the team and yelled “That dishwasher had better be down by 3pm, OR ELSE!”
Now, if this had have been a big brawly man with a powerful voice, maybe the intimidation tactic may have worked. But not for Hannah.
My colleague Taylor responded with, “Or what Hannah, what are you going to do?”. Of course, the entire team burst out in laughter at poor Hannahs expense. Let’s face it though, she kind of asked for this.
My last manager on the other hand did use his
power and intimidation
to influence his staff to ‘
perform
’. The secret about people who try to use ‘
power & intimidation
’ as a means to getting results, they need to be challenged. Submitting to them is only reinforcing their behaviour.
I rang my boss one day and told him that I didn't appreciate something he had done, to my surprise, he accepted my request to change that behaviour. The issue still was, that although he changed toward me, he continued to behave poorly toward other staff. All but 2 staff eventually quit.
When it comes to finding a solution, I recommend trying to resolve the matter with the person rather than going straight above them. Give them an opportunity to work through it with you rather than making a complaint.
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Here are 15 steps you could follow to help you determine how to identify underlying issues and how to best approach someone or a group of people in the workplace.
Consider the motivation behind their behaviour.
How is this behaviour impacting on you and your ability to work?
What about their behaviour would you like to see changed?
If they were to make the changes, how could they go about this?
Do you feel comfortable talking to them about the issue?
If you do feel confident having a chat with them, ask them to meet with you for a coffee.
If not, maybe consider asking a third party to be present so you are able to.
Let them know that their behaviour is having an impact on you and your work and ask them why they are doing this.
Whether or not they respond with an answer, remind them that it is impacting you and let them know what you would like to see changed.
Then ask them if they feel this is a reasonable request.
If they disagree, let them know that it’s an expectation of yours to see something change. Ask them what they feel may be more reasonable.
If they can't give you anything. Then there is nothing more you should do here. Document it and take it to your superior or their superior.
If they respond well to your approach, then this is a great opportunity to build a new relationship with someone you possibly never thought you would.
NEVER try to approach more than 1 person at a time.
Make sure to document everything that happened in the conversation and the changes you both agreed to put in place.
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lalisagiata · 4 years ago
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Sguazziamo nella noia, restiamo passive e ogni tanto proviamo qualche brivido vivendo nel segreto. I Tenenbaum (2001) , Wes Anderson #wesanderson #movie #myfavouritemovie #tenenbaums #lalisagiata #art #lifestyle #illustration #art #mylife #bored #stunning #smoke #secret #love #family https://www.instagram.com/p/CE2b2qVhakM/?igshid=186clrecz0ba2
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moviebehindin · 4 years ago
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தெறிக்க விட்ட Super hit திரைப்படம் #3yearsofmaragathananayam #adhi #Daniel #ArunrajaKamaraj #nikkgalrani #myfavouritemovie #tamilcinima #moviebehind @aadhiofficial @danianniepope @arunraja_kamaraj @nikkigalrani www.moviebehind.in https://www.instagram.com/p/CBfp2J6FCnN/?igshid=1rt771ycy9ha5
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artisticcleopatra · 5 years ago
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good morning, good afternoon, good evening, and good night 😊 #TheTrumanShow #MyFavouriteMovie (at Seahaven, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/B8gUMWBBGxu/?igshid=102sg4t6h6xmv
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claudiafeuerstake · 5 years ago
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OMG....it feels like Christmas morning! I am so excited about this. Super thrilled to see another Matrix movie. Love the actors, the concept, the metaphors, the action, the videography... Yah! 🎉🎊🥂✨💫 #thematrix #thematrix4 #keanureeves #carrieannemoss #comingsoon #movies #besttrilogy #myfavouritemovie (at Oakville The Preserve) https://www.instagram.com/p/B1aojWCHq3W/?igshid=o4n28zquq9gq
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jaseyrae91 · 6 years ago
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When you know exactly what scene they're using for advertising by the screenshot 🤣 #myfavouritemovie #myfairlady #comeonDover #MOVEYOURBLOOMINARSE (at Halifax, Nova Scotia) https://www.instagram.com/p/BtKIHhrAsqnKqVXB74pI4NDTRgfAi84w_eFoqU0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=mm5hnkasg79f
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justwalkiingthedog · 2 years ago
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my-favorite-movies · 7 years ago
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Call me by your name (2017) A movie starring Timothée Chalamet and Armie Hammer. It's directed by Luca Guadagnino, and written as a novel in 2007 by André Aciman. It's about a boy who has feelings for his dad's student. It is based in Italy and that's all I'm gonna say about it. You should watch it it is amazing!
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My Favourite Movies:
Wonder Woman (2017)
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lazyfish73 · 6 years ago
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Quale migliore giorno per riguardare per la 500esima volta #loveactually ? #buonnatale ! #myfavouritemovie #bestmovie #hughgrant #colinfirth #alanrickman #liamneeson #lovemovie #romanticmovie https://www.instagram.com/p/Brzlk0ggRj-/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1gqhpxh1gz2zh
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medeafurens · 6 years ago
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#myevening #alonebutnotlonely #comedy #film #riflessioni #smileisbetter #withlove #waitingforyou #love #lamorenonvainvacanza #theholyday #myfavouritemovie #lovemovies #divano #dicembre #christmasmovies #dreams #smile #aspettandolamore #ridiamocisu #judelaw #jackblack #katewinslet #camerondiaz https://www.instagram.com/p/BrV7xpuHy0Q/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1b3bl2635a26d
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baddtv-blog · 6 years ago
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THIS IS A B.A.D.D. TV 📺 HOW HIGH 2 COMING SOON Starring @methodmanofficial @redmangilla @lilyachty THIS SHOULD BE THE THEME SONG SHMARIJUANA By @ogproduct_odv At O M T promotions we support local businesses. YOU HAVE AN OBLIGATION TO YOUR BUSINESS. PROMOTE IT TODAY WITH US O M T PROMOTIONS. Cheers, Daniel Borges paypal.me/baddomt FOR PROMOTION CONTACT @big_vike_617 @ej.lovett.35 #cinema #film #movies #movie #actor #cine #films #art #actress #love #hollywood #cinematography #ogproduct #baddtvdrops #mymovie #mipelicula #redman #myfavouritemovie #methodman #director #instagood #castingcalls #photooftheday #follow #like #artist #lilyachtymemes #theatre #howhigh2 @mreckgm @moneymav @djelsid (at Harvard University) https://www.instagram.com/p/BoOqkTiHISh/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=147wu7l576zzp
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cophinerush · 7 years ago
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La scena tagliata... #Titanic #MyPassion #MyObsession #MyFavouriteMovie #TheBestLoveStoryEver #TrueStory #TrueLove #Colossal #11PremiOscar #MyHeartWillGoOn #CelineDion #1997
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danielhondermann-blog · 7 years ago
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green green rocky road #insidellewyndavis #myfavouritemovie (at Greenwich Village)
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ladyaragorn13 · 7 years ago
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The Lion King 
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