#my wrist is on fire dont want to draw

[qumiiiquinnquin]

ill never be good enough at anything

[jadenvargen]

do you still use references or are you at the point where you don't need them anymore?

i use references, no shame! it depends on what it is. if i've drawn it enough to be comfortable with it, no. usually for anatomy i don't use reference, but other times i take pictures of myself, like grabbing my wrist hard to see how the skin bunches up, pressing my hands to my face, stuff like that. but no i mean, i think if you want to draw stuff you have no idea what it looks like (and i'm the kind of person that can't see any image in my mind when imagining stuff, zero apple or whatever), you kind of have to use a ref if your goal is some sort of versimilitude. same with how a certain material looks. i dont think u can ever have all of that in your head.

right now i'm painting a commission that includes a cat on his hind legs firing two guns, so plentiful references employed lol! i seldom draw any of those things.

[honeeslust]

Shota Aizawa | Bound

‼️‼️🔞‼️‼️NSFW‼️‼️🔞‼️🔞

😶2k+ words 👉🏾👈����

"So you're trying to tell me, that I'm not supposed to lust after all of this, warm, pliant, sensual flesh. I wish you could look at yourself and see what I see. "

"I try, but it's just not something that comes naturally to me."

"It should, there's nothing more beautiful than a woman's body..."

"...Every single thing about you is made exactly the way it was meant to be. You should love everything about yourself..." Shota closes his hands around my thick waist. "There's no one else who looks like you..."

He kisses my cheek and then my lips. "...no one else sounds like you..."

He kisses my neck with his tongue making me moan.

"...no one else feels like you...." he sighs, slipping his long slender fingers over my thick ass and squeezing as he stands between my legs. His mouth comes close to mine and he smiles just before I open my mouth for him. His tongue slips inside and swirls just once before he pulls away with a loud smack from my puckered lips.

"...or tastes like you." he rubs little circles just under my arms making me squirm.

"Stop, that tickles." I giggle and try to move his hands.

"I'm just trying to show my appreciation. Don't shy away from me now doll."

Aizawa showers my face with kisses, whispering all his little delectable anecdotes. I'm melting around him like putty. All I can do is feel his warmth, and the strength of his hands as he caresses my body.

Suddenly, there's a glint of scarlet that flashes in his eyes as he takes my arms in a firm grip and kisses me. The warm and wet newness fills me with a warmth that eventually clamps itself onto my heart.

"Let's try something new tonight.

"What" I say with my eyes rolling lustily at him withdrawing his lips from mine.

Well, first, I'm thinking I want to bind your wrists. I don't want your hands interfering when I'm teasing your body. I don't want you shying away from my touch. I dont want there to be any way for you to hide from me."

"MM, yeah? What else?"

He draws in a slow breath between his teeth, "I think I'd rather just show you."

"I like the way that sounds."

Aizawa backs away slowly, his eyes still fixed on me. I smile back at him as he disappears into his closet. He comes back with a set of long flat bandages that resemble the binds that he uses for work.

"Is- that??"

"Mmm-hmm, something like that," he quips before I can finish with a knowing nod of his head.

"You trust me?" He asks raising his brow. I nod to him.

"Good girl."

He parts my legs with his knees, spreading them wide as he ascends over my body. His mouth claims the light moans escaping from my lips as our kiss deepens.

He backs away again leaving me panting after him,

"Stay just there, okay."

He holds up a blindfold and my eyes grow wide with curiosity. He slips the silky cloth over my head and as I'm plunged into darkness, every nerve ending in my body alights. I pant softly licking my lips and wondering when his much-needed touch would set me on fire.

Just as I want to speak, Aizawa's voice fills the silence. "So, these are not much unlike the binds you've seen me use before. I had them made just for you."

Aizawa brushes the side of my face with the binds. It's softer than the other sets for sure.

"It's silky," I say surprised. "I like it."

"Mm-hmm." Shota hums in agreement.

He moves and immediately, I feel the absence of his warmth as he steps away from me. My short nervous breaths grow shaky and seemingly more audible. I don't know what he has planned for me but I'm not worried, but on edge with excitement. I can hear him shuffling around and I resist the urge to peek and see what he's doing.

Something tickles the my arm and I stir a little. The binds wrap around my wrists and gently they tighten. I can feel Aizawa's warm body between my legs again as the restraints slowly pull my arms behind my back and hold them there.

First, it's his tongue that I feel. He licks my neck and grasps my breast with his hands. Then it was the electric feeling in my veins as his warm mouth closed over my nipple. He played with the sensitive bead with his tongue and my pussy throbbed heavy and hot between my legs.

"I told you every part of you was made to love."

He continues to suck and play with my tits making me squirm as the restraints pull at my arms. It was odd not being able to reach up and run my fingers through his hair the way I normally would. But the restriction made me that much hotter.

"These supple tits, so luscious and spilling from my grasp." he pressed his face between my breasts, muffling his groans while he teased my nipples by rolling them gently between his fingers.

Soon after, it was his hands I felt tracing over the stretch marks of my inner thighs. His hands closed around the thickest part of my legs and what felt like velvet straps enclosed around my calves and ankles and slid up to my thighs. My mouth went dry as I panted desperately trying to close my legs. The binds held tight, gently sinking into my skin and keeping my thighs apart from one another.

Aizawas fingers danced so close to my pussy, but would move away every time my tummy quivered as I tried to squeeze my legs shut.

"You always try to hide..." I can feel the heat from his mouth as he whispers against my skin. "...Don't..." His tongue glides along my inner thigh. "...not from me."

"I don't wanna hide from you Aizawa, I promise."

"So don't." He squeezes my thighs even tighter as his fingers probe along my sensitive slit, he does it so softly that it tickles. But I remain still, eager to behave so he can finally let me feel his tongue taste my flesh.

"Please, I don't want to hide, let me have it Aizawa, Please."

Suddenly he lifts the blindfold and after a few lazy blinks, his intense dark eyes are the first thing I see.

"Watch me." He says before dropping his head between my thighs. He looks up through his dark lashes as he starts rolling his tongue between the folds of my throbbing sex. The binds hold tight to all their places on my skin as the shock of his tongue rocks my body. He builds with long slow licks to either side of my slit before parting them with his slender fingers. I stare down at him as he swipes his tongue right over my clit.

"Ah Ah—I won't hide, not anymore."

His stubble prickles against my skin as he tastes me. He rolls his tongue back and forth pressing down with just the right amount of pressure until I'm shaking and coming on his tongue. His eyes burn into mine from between my legs as he groans, happily lapping away at the slick flow until I'm whimpering to him how sensitive it is. He brought his head back up and kissed my lips letting me taste my sweetness on his tongue.

"Turn over onto your hands and knees for me," he says, giving my restraints just enough slack for me to reposition myself. I turn around and lean over on my hands.

I jolt as I feel the familiar softness of the silky binds running softly down my back while he whispers to me, "Very nice." Even though he's being gentle, I can tell that the binds are sturdy when manipulated differently. The sweet sting of sound smack across my flesh confirms my suspicion and I gasp pleasantly in shock.

"I hope you're ready."

I sigh as I writhe with anticipation "I am."

Just then, all at once, I'm trapped. It's so sudden that my breath catches in my throat. My nerves just barely begin to settle when I feel the binds cinching tight around my neck. Not so tight that I can't breathe but I can tell that he can maneuver them well enough to easily tighten if he pleases. My wrists are again bound behind my back and I lean forward onto my chest with my ass in the air, unable to move.

The restriction of my movement sends my body into a free fall. It's his finger skimming through the drenched slit that makes me writhe against the restraints even more but they aren't letting me move much at all. All I'll be able to do is take him. A sweet fluttering tickles my core at the thought and I lay there waiting anxiously as his fingers played in the wetness.

"If you need me to stop, just tell me," he says, positioning himself behind me.

"Mm-hhmmm" I agree knowing full well it is unlikely. I want all of what he's going to give me.

With a soft pop, he's inside me. He moves back and forth and the binds on my hands pull tight, jerking my body back and allowing him to thrust deeper.

"You feel like heaven." His words resonate and his thrusting squelches aloud as my clenched walls squeeze his length inside me. My eyes roll back as he's already fucking me stupid.

Aizawa doesn't hold back. He tightens up on the binds and a I can feel the tugging tighten around my neck as he plows right into me. The reverberation of my ass clapping violently against his hips fills the room. CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP. His nuts slap against my clit, making my pussy a creamy mess. The illicit noises grow sloppier sounding the more he fucks himself into me.

"Ayye Ssshhh-. Oh fuck!"

I cry out for him as he drives himself deep inside me touching my cervix and making me scream his name with every tender blow.

"Goood fucking girl" he hisses through clenched teeth gripping my ass keeping me where he wants me so he can fill me completely.

"Ahhh Shota, it's too much I'm gonna cum.." I cry out to him not wanting it to be over. I wasn't ready but it feels too good, I'm gonna come if he doesn't stop.

"Not yet" he growls "Not fucking yet"

He swells inside me as I near the edge, he grunts like a beast as he fucks me harder and the belts tighten around my neck. I falter under the pressure, dizzied with arousal and lost in the elation. My scream comes out as a rasp when his girth clips my g spot over and over and I can't help myself, and I cum hard on his stiff dick.

As I lay there wailing in pleasure he slaps my ass hard making he clench down on him tight keeping his thick head from pulling back out.

"Fuck" he sighs as he twitches with his release.

"You were supposed to wait for me baby" he leans over me gasping for breath. O roll to my side and he lies next to me.

"Guess I've got to teach you don't I?" he says just before kissing my lips and releasing all of the tethers from my body. I sigh as he massages over the slight bruising around my wrists.

"Sorry, it was feeling too good."

"It's ok, I'm going to have fun teaching you. But you did well just now. Now more hiding. Ok?" he presses a small sweet kiss to my temple before pulling a blanket over me and holding me in his arms.

"Yes, Shota."

[maluspumilaa]

word ramble about the southerngothic farcille au bc im too tired to draw rn + i want to get better at talking about my fandom stuff on here !! below the cut since im still a bit shackled by cringe

so i had an entire whiteboard but its gone now because i am Not paying for premium but thats okay

this is pretty unstructured but i really like chewing on this au brainstyle

i think that imogen and laudna met on the island after separately being adventurers for a little bit (personally i think laudna wouldnt have had the best luck getting jobs, with the whole scary/off-putting thing about her, but still would be scraping by) – no magic academy, sorry farcille lovers

in terms of the bells hells: im honestly not sure !! i think that it would be cool to have them just be an adventuring party and all have ventured down to save laudna but i dont know how that would work, since it gets dangerous to adventure with a party larger than six or so... maybe someone joins after laudna dies, senshi style? i dont know how much meshi will be in the dungeon meshi au tbh

a lot of this au is me building around the fact i went "what if lesbians from one fandom were the lesbians from the other one" tbh

the treant that laudna is chimaeraed up with is definitely meant to do the same job as the red dragon from dunmeshi . im thinking about a crazy large treant btw. like a hulking monstrous mass of gnarled branches that shambles with alarming speed. bark so thick it seems like fire doesnt do anything except anger it. all that

also !! @/sharkodactyl 's comments on my first art post about this au made me insane (/pos), i def think that the imagery of replacing some of laudnas bones with parts of the treant is awesome... something something it ground up some of her bones to use like bone meal for itself and its not like they can just fix that damage

so they use parts from the treant in the ritual hoping that the absorbed bone will be okay to use . and it turns out fine (no it doesnt) !

ABOUT THE RESURRECTION: i think mashing the dnd and dungeon meshi resurrection scenes would be beautiful to me. i deeply enjoy laudnas resurrection in c3, maybe with the ancient magic ritual there has to be some calling of the spirit to beckon it forth or something?? i just want imogen to talk to laudna before the ritual . feels like it raises the stakes or something

also!! if you look at my au art youll see that laudna still has her ear cuff things. that is because i gave her different trauma for this au ♡

until there was some event like what happened in falins backstory, but after laudna was an adult, leading to worse, more direct treatment from her village/city – i was thinking that due to the general anti-elf/anti-magic attitude in her village, individuals deemed especially "dangerous" or suspected of practicing dark magic would have their ears cut to resemble elves (similar to the canaries but. worse i think)

from what ive gathered, a lot of tallman communities in dungeon meshi (specifically what ive seen of laios and falins northern village) are to some degree intolerant of magic, not super open minded, and to me laudna hails from a village or city around there (or somewhere similar to there) and ended up leaving because, like falin, she had an affinity towards seeing ghosts and performing magic and suffered for it

generally, she was a little bit of an outcast even as a child because she was just kind of scary? she had that weird girl swag but nothing that made her stick out all that much

SO BASICALLY thats why she has those ear covers. she doesnt like looking at the scars . maybe they also tried to hang her ? i dont know

also alsoo imogen in this au does have her lightning markies. frequently i forget those. i think theyre more subtle generally (to the point of looking like really pronounced veins) and restricted to mostly her wrists/hand area but they do glow when she uses magic (not a lot ! maybe a lot during the resurrection scene but thats for my enjoyment more than anything)

her lighning markies + hair color is still from her being ruidus-born. it has some sway over ley lines/mana in some way but the attitude in this au is very much the same as in exandria in cr (represents negative things to people, not seen as a good omen, and generally isnt focused on). it still flares and such, but the flares affect stuff with magic – something something it makes magic more volatile/is linked in some way to ancient magic

i think imogen (+ her mother) would have been fairly ostracized by the small village she grew up in (but not as severely as laudna) due to their unique appearances as a result of being ruidus-born. liliana still leaves relvin and a young imogen but not before introducing lifespan angst into her daughters mind

i think. ruidus flares fuck with peoples lifespan. generally elongates them by a good bit? since it has that connection with ancient magic which is from a time of longer lifespans and such

anyways. imogen ventured out from home to find out where her mother went + learn more about her ruidus-born status and such. she came to melini (or. the exandrian equivalent to it?) for research reasons, maybe to make money before setting off on her travels once again or something

and then met laudna and was charmed a normal amount by her on first meeting and decided to stay dungeon diving with her (and bells hells? for a little while after)

also dont ask about pate i dont know either. maybe he is just a little inanimate puppet made out of dead things or maybe hes a regular rat that wears a bird skull sometimes . maybe he has wings . hes a familiar he can do what he wants

if you made it this far, thank you for reading !! i would love interaction about this au :3 sorry if any of this got really long or ramble-y i have many thoughts LOL

[hederasgarden]

Hey bestie! ❤️ We need more sierra six x dom - i've recently rewatched the gray man and your fics ignited the fire even more, especially the dom one...so good! 🤌🤌 (dont feel pressured tho, only if you feel like writing)❤️

So happy you liked it!

I am working on part 2 as we speak. Please enjoy this little snippet.

Warnings for D/s dynamics, submission, kneeling and subspace. Mild sexual content. 18+ only.

Masterlist ♡ The Grey Man Masterlist

“Open your mouth,” Six says, reaching into the bowl of fruit. The blackberry looks tiny between his thick fingers. They're warm and dry as they slip past your lips to deposit the berry on your tongue. “Chew,” he says, withdrawing.

The berry is ripe enough that it melts in your mouth, sweet and tart. You sigh at the taste and rub your cheek against his thigh.

“You’re going to eat this whole bowl for me,” he says and you respond with a soft, yes sir.

He feeds you each piece of fruit by hand, peppering in praise for how well you’re doing and offering you a sip of water now and then. More than the fruit you love the feel of his fingers in your mouth, their heavy warmth, and the hint of salt on his skin. You think about having something else there. Another way you might make him happy and help yourself relax. The image has you pressing your thighs together and your heart racing.

With each soft word of encouragement and the building heat in your belly, you grow a little bolder. The next time he deposits a piece of strawberry in your mouth you close your lips around his fingers before he can withdraw. You suck on them, tongue curling around his thumb with a low moan.

Six inhales sharply, a ripple of something passing over his normally blank face. It’s only a moment but it’s enough to embolden you further. You lift your head and grasp his wrist, repeating the action with your tongue. He stares at you for a long moment, breathing shallowly. The hand you place on his upper thigh seems to snap him out of it. His jaw flexes and he pulls his fingers from your mouth.

“Sir….I’m sorry.” You draw back embarrassed, but he’s quick, leaning forward to grasp your jaw firmly. His face is impassive once more and when he speaks his voice is calm and measured.

"This is not why we’re here today,” he reminds you. Even though you want to look away from his intense gaze, you know you’re not supposed to do so you force yourself to keep looking.

He releases you and leans back, shifting in the chair before relaxing again. "Now, put your head back where it belongs," he says, picking up the bowl again.

[autisticlancemcclain]

fic rec friday 33

welcome to the thirty-third fic rec friday! where, on friday, i rec five of my favourite fics.

1. Rose-Colored Boy by melancholymango

“I missed you, you know.”

“Yeah?” Lance sighed, warm and giddy, clearly not absorbing how serious the words truly were. Keith nodded his head for a few seconds, not trusting himself to speak around the size of his emotions. He was suddenly brought back to the years alone on the whale, when all he’d had to keep him going was memories of his friends, of Lance.

“Yeah.” Keith said, more certainty in his voice now. He reached down, hesitantly threading his fingers through Lance’s and giving his hand a squeeze. Lance tensed next to him. “I still do.”

“I mean, I’m right here.”

“Are you? You still seem pretty far away.”

again i know im not really big on those fics that make the team out to be deliberately cruel, but sometimes its cathartic tbh. sometimes you remember canon and ur just like yeah what if he got angry. what if someone got angry for him. what then. and mango gives us that

2. Swamp of Sorrows by SwissArmyKnife

Pike gets exposed to acidic ooze, which leads Block (& Keith) to make a few discoveries about their party’s rogue.

“We can't leave them like this,” Meklavar said of Valayun and Pike, who’d been laid beside the fire. "Look at how bad those welts are." She came up with a bottle of oil and a cake of soap. "I can smell water nearby. We can get them washed and roll them in a blanket to sleep off the spore. What do you think?"

"I think it's our only choice," Takashi said.

monsters and mana fic!!!!! everybody say YES to righteous anger on pike’s behalf. and also say yes to pike bc i love him. this fic is interesting bc its a little tense and awkward bc this ragtag team of misfits doesnt quite trust each other yet but they also cant quite stop themselves from caring about each other. so even though they dont all agree on eveyrthing and dont agree about all, they do agree that pike needs more care than he got. also unrelated but the fact that shiro’s m&m name is fucking takashi kills me every time like man just wants to be himself 💀

3. Beneath the Champagne Sea by SwissArmyKnife

The paladins make a diplomatic visit to a planet with sexual dimorphism roughly opposite that of Earth. Women are larger and more powerful, while men are leaner and smaller. Cue their horror at gaunt, sickly Pidge and mild disgust with the ’womanly’ Shiro. Lance hits the sweet spot. He's got the build and features to draw the eyes and the charm to keep them. Their hosts are quite taken with him, in particular the daughter of the queen, whose forwardness is a comic reversal of Lance’s usual dynamic with women. Lance likes the attention and finds her intriguing, but eventually things take a discomforting turn.

Lance tried to step around her, wanting to walk away from a conversation that seemed less and less likely to end well, but Leh’n seized his wrist before he could. Her grip was tight, and freeing himself would require an act of aggression, which he still wanted to avoid. ‘Think of the mission, of how important it is to get the castle up and running again,’ he coached himself.

Still, that did nothing to stop his blood pressure from skyrocketing as Leh’n leaned closer and said. “I am not accustomed to reluctance.”

i swear to god that ive recced this before, but i couldnt find it in my records so here it is!! this fic is endlessly fascinating. the exploration of gender roles is super interesting, considering who is impacted in this fic and how. the discussion about beauty standards, power imbalances, the alien wrench in things was so cool! and i think lance, who is very much someone who rides that gender lines in terms of presentation of hobbies and even chracter traits, makes sense as the main character here. interesting think piece. 

4. you had me at merlot by @ryomakun

“Oh my God,” Lance says as he covers his face. Keith’s tinny voice blares from his laptop speakers: “What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.” See, this joke might have been funny if someone charismatic and charming had said it, but Keith’s flat voice and even flatter expression effectively kidnaps, tortures, and then decapitates any chance of it being remotely humorous.

--

Keith accidentally starts a YouTube channel. Lance, of course, refuses to be left out. It goes about as well as you'd expect. (Ft. copious amounts of wine and a truly shameless number of references to MyDrunkKitchen, DailyGrace, and general pop culture)

this fic is HILARIOUS. its one of the firsts i ever screenshotted for the scrapbook i have of fics that made me laugh out loud. i offer you this one part that really made me giggle: 

““It tastes good,” Keith says petulantly as he glares at the accusing finger Hunk has pointed at him. “No offense Hunk but that stuff you gave me for my twenty-first tasted like feet and antiseptic.”

“That was a merlot,” Hunk wails. “The good kind, too!”

Ignoring them, Lance stands in front of the rum selection. This is why he didn’t want to bring anyone. They might call him loud and embarrassing, but at least he doesn’t yell inside WalMart about the virtues of a “real red wine.” An elderly couple passes through, eying the bickering three. Lance resolutely pretends he is here shopping by himself.“

the way they are so ridiculous that LANCE of all people is embarrassed of them...cinema. also this fic is peak bc it has klance as enemies to lovers and childhood friends to lovers at the same time. iconique

5. Flayed by @admiralcanthackett

Lance gets hit with a face full of spores and it leaves him wracked with pain. Touch is the only relief he can find.

yes i know i tag this author all the time but in my defense there was a point in my life where i was OBSESSED with faer fics. truly. anyways this one has unexpectedly protective keith, like to a very high degree, and im loving the heavy themes of trust and emotional as well as physical vulnerability 

that’s it for today!! i’ll see y’all back next friday for the next fic rec post!!!

[blaxcunicorn]

Goodbye

Synopsis : Eren and the reader saying their goodbyes

Length : 1.1k words

Content : fem!reader, spoilers, nsfw warning, minors do not interact. Oral sex (female recieving), kissing and a bit angst at the end

Authors note : Hi, this is my first ever fic and decided to dedicate to the ml. Hope you guys like it as I was very anxious about posting it. I also wanna apologize in advance for any language mistakes as English is not my first language. Hope you guys will give me feedback on how to improve my writing. Thank you🥰

You are lying in bed admiring the sunrise that is growing through the window. The colors makes you feel alive. You stroke his big hands while feeling his heavy breathing on your neck. Turning around and admiring the young man sleeping beside you. Eren and you met as three year olds in Shinganshina after his father treated your mother from an illness.

Since then the two of you have been inseparable. Losing your loved ones after the fall of the wall and the battles against the titans really took a toll on you and Eren has been very supportive through that period. However, he noticed that every day the glow in your eyes faded and your once wide smile that would light up a Room vanished. Regardless of that he never stopped loving you. "Dont you agree that it is a bit creepy starring at someone sleeping?", you feel your cheeks burn right as the sound of Eren’s raspy voice takes you back to reality.

"I was just reminiscing the past", Eren kisses your forehead and strokes your cheeks with his thumbs while looking at you with sad eyes "dont think about it too much love". Some guilt creeped upon you as you were the one who suggested to Eren that the two of you should run away from the war. To start a new life togheter, to forget the past and the war against Paradise. "Im sorry" you respond as you grip his wrist and lean into his left hand to feel his warmth. As you close your eyes your head starts aching and you starts seeing flashes of events. The Colossal Titans marching, Eren eating the War Hammer Titan and Levi being injured. You cannot really wrap around what those flashes are.

"Y/N,Y/N!" you hear as the flashy memories disappears. "Huh" you respond as you feel tears running down your cheeks. Eren wipes your tears with his thumbs and kisses your lips gently. The kiss turned passionate and greedy which makes you moan. Eren starts kissing your neck before gently pushing you down on your back. He then starts slowly roaming around your body and kisses every inch of your body and takes his time on your skin. Feeling it while his hands massage your inner thighs gently. You feel on fire and moan "Eren, Eren". He looks at you with love struck eyes and responds with "yes my love, how do you wish for me to pleasure you?", while reaching two fingers on your clit and draws circle on them.

"I-I want you to mmmh go down on me". He responds with a smile and reaches down to your inner thighs. Kissing around the inside of your legs and bites you near your lips. He runs his tongue on each side of your lips and his big hands goes around your legs to keep you comfy in place and rests his hands on your stomach. Eren then explores the entrance of your slit with his tongue to tease you more, hardening it against the side, not yet going for the clit. You moan "Eren please don’t tease me". He responds with giving you a quick kiss your lips as an apology, before licking from the bottoms of your slit to your clit slow and long. Before hardening his tongue on your clit to stimulate it with flicks but not too fast as it might be too sensitive. Then circling his lips around your clit to suck on it gently at first before each suck becomes harder, rougher and sloppier. He puts both his index and middle finger in your mouth before inserting them inside your slit. Pushing them in and out, your uncontrollable moans and the sound of Eren eating you out fills the room. He starts pacing and you are on cloud 9. You reaches down to his manbun and pulls his head closer, he starts breathing hard and moans which creates a big vibration. You are on the edge as you feel a familiar pleasure building up.

"Eren, I’m…ugh!" you moan as you roll your eyes and catch your breath. Eren pulls out his fingers and make you suck on them while starring into each others eyes. You are reaching down to Eren’s pants but stopped by his hands on your wrist. "It’s okay, today is about you" he rasply says while slowing pressing his forhead on yours and gently stroke his thumb on your palm. You close your eyes before more flashes shows up. "Y/N?" Eren says softly while you widely stare at him.

"We are not supposed to be here, right Eren?", he looks at you with broken eyes "I guess we don’t have much time left". You ask him with a shaken voice "b-but why did you take me here?" Eren hugs you and whispers in your ear "because you are one of the few people I’d like to say goodbye to before I die". You try to break out of the hug but Eren is too strong so you are just stuck there, with your head on his chest.

"Eren, why? Why all this?" you say as a burning feeling hits your eyes but you try to keep yourself composed. "I need to die so that you, Mikasa, Armin and the others can live long and happy lives". That made you finally break down in tears, your throat is on fire but you are still trying to talk. "P-p-please don’t…I-I don’t want you to leave me alone…please Eren! I love being with you, I love myself when I’m with you and I love who I become when we are togheter. I don’t know what I’ll do once you are gone.I beg you, isn’t it any other option?"

Eren is tearing up and responds with "Y/N, as much as I desire to be with you, be with all of you I can’t. This evil circle has to end and it will only end if I die. I do not wish for any of you to live in danger anymore. If I should hear that you died, my life as I know it, the me who is speaking with you now, will cease to exist." You sobe out "Eren I don’t want you to die!" He takes one hand and starts stroking your head. You look up to see his eyes and he responds with "I will never fully die, I will live on in you. Promise me one thing, that you’ll smile again" before kissing your lips gently but passionatly.

You close your eyes one last time before feeling wind blowing your face. "Goodbye Eren, thank you for everything" you whisper with a smile. "I know where he is, Captain Levi!"

[43sol]

Sis wrote the most crack, most spelling-error, most uninformed oneshot of T&B that is somehow in-character and awful and I cried real tears of horror and joy. My heart is full right now. imma draw a Most Serious comic of this.

~~~~

Baranby opens his texting app fully expecting that the old  man was having another crisis only to be pleasantly surprised at the content of the messages. 

---

The rapid fire rate of incoming  texts could only mean one person was the sender. 

Hey Bunny-chan!!!~  (^_-)-☆

Crazy week right??! ( ༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ ) 

Well i dont know bout you but i want to kick back and have soem FUn 

And guess what?

And he supposes at this point Kotestu had wanted him to guess but he didn’t answer in the appropriate time alloted and grew impatient. 

Director got me some coupons to a fancy restaurant

And since we still havnet gotten our drinks yet 

Meet me friday at this location!! ∩(·ω·)∩

An address pops into his maps. 

Dont forget to dress up! (≧∇≦)/

—-

Barnaby should have known that something was up when the old man told him to dress up but he was too distracted by the butterflies in his stomach and the heat in his cheeks to think clearly. And by the time Friday rolled around, he had already arrived 20 minutes early dressed in his nines when reality finally began to sober him up. 

He can’t believe he wasted the suit that (as Fire Embelm put it) “made his ass extra phat” on this place. 

He stands there a little too long slack-jawed that Kotetsu actually finds him outside the restaurant. 

“Hey Bunny-chan!” he says in a way that makes Baranby’s heart flutter but also gives him the urge to wrap his hands around that thick sturdy neck, “glad you could make it!”

And there he is. Dressed in his normal clothes.

“I thought you said to dress fancy?” 

“Uh yeah, see?” He does a little twirl and tips his cap forward. “I got my shirt ironed.”

“Old man-” but before he could finish he is ushered inside and they are seated in ‘the best seat in the house’ because oh god Kotestsu actually made a reservation. 

This establishment  is a place Baranby never thought he would in a million years find himself in. But since meeting Wild Tiger, these event have been happening more and more often. 

Looking around the Texas-style decor, the waiters in cowboy outfits and just so much bovine memorabilia…

“This is Tyson Bison Steakhouse and Winery.”

“Yeah super fancy right?!” 

“It’s a franchise.”

“A fancy franchise!”

“There is a cardboard cut out of Tyson Bison behind you.”

“ It’s like having our friends here but not!”

Obviously nothing could ruin the good mood for Kotetsu T Karuragi. Who has seduced not one, but two people in his life with his buffoonary. 

“Whatever.” 

“That’s the spirit! And don’t worry,” he takes the coupons out of his vest and fans himself with them like a rich old lady, “Dinner’s on me!”

—-

Ok. The food wasn’t horrible. 

And the company wasn’t either. 

Maybe he was even enjoying himself? Maybe Kotetsu-san really did have good ideas sometimes. They needed some time to let loose. What was a better place no one would bother them than the franchise chain one of their friends/coworkers sponsors?

And then the check came. 

Kotetsu, in total confidence, hands the cowboy-waiter his coupons with a smile and a wink. The cowboy-waiter is not impressed. 

“Sir, these coupons are good for a free appetizer. I still need your payment information.” 

Wild Tiger laughs nervously. 

Barnaby starts to feel his blood pressure rise. 

“But you see my buddy, the DIRECTOR OF JUSTICE, gave these to me. For a meal here!”

“Yes and the coupons are good for an appetizer.” 

“I don’t see that written here.”

“Please look at the fine print sir.” 

Oh course the old man’s downfall was him being …well old. 

Barnaby decides to throw him a bone especially since the dinner wasn’t that bad. He pulls out his credit card only to be stopped by Tiger grabbing his wrist. 

“I can’t let you do that Bunny. I’m treatin’ ya today.” 

He scoffs. “You didn’t bring enough money old man, I’ll pay.” 

“No I am.” 

“an d how are you going to do that?” 

Kotetsu points to the cardboard cut out behind him. “That’s how.”

“You can’t be serious” 

“You can’t be serious sir”

“I’m very serious Bunny. The sign says if I can finish a 35 ib steak in 20 mins the meal is free.” Kotetsu turns to the waiter, “So bring me my steak!”

“Sir please.”

“Kotetsu san please, this is ridiculous.”

But Kotetsu already is re seated, tying a bib around his neck, fork and knife ready. 

“Bring me my steak!” 

With much horror, Sternbuild’s number one hero watches as the wait staff bring out a massive steak to his waiting partner and a large comically hourglass. 

The original cowboy-waiter looks like he wants to be anywhere but here. But regardless he does his job, “Begin!” 

And Kotetsu shoves the steak into his mouth.

Which lasts about 20 seconds.

Barnaby watches in horror as his work partner and life buddy makes the universal sign for choking and falls to the restaurant floor. 

Diners begin screaming and the wait staff begin scrambling to call the ambulance. 

Barnaby himself falls to the floor next to Tiger’s side as the love of his life gasps and spits out steak chunks. 

Once the coughing subsides, Barnaby can make out a raspy (but sexy) words, “I’m sorry Bunny-chan… I just wanted… to show you a good time…”

“Old man, you’re so stupid…” He would of had fun regardless of where they were. 

Still coughing but able to sit up, “Next time… you choose the place!” 

Barnaby couldn’t help but chuckle. 

“We will waive your bill if you leave now.” Both of the heroes turn to see the original cowboy-waiter behind them, “and if you two never come back we won’t press charges.”  

[grimnisdottir]

If it is not too troublesome I would love if you could write me even small snippet of Madatobi or Indratobi or all three together for this kind of idea:

Fantasy themed sorry if you dont do those!

Tobirama finds an old scroll, which he hear about from his parents or granparents(?) Or elders in clan you can decide if it is ninja world or modern. He decides to take it back to his own apartment to look at it properly. And study it.

He gets to go back to apartment and he accidentally summons creature/s from it.

Hi!

I hope this satisfies!

~~•~~•~~•~~

The thing about old family magicks was that it always meant something could go wrong. His mother made him swear not to touch the scroll, not unless he was prepared. Prepared for what? His mother never explained, and his father always just looked amused but never said a word.

Sighing, Tobirama taps the desk to the rhythm of some song that’s ringing in his brain. An ear twitches at the phantom sound, and his tail swings back and forth. He stares at the scroll.

It stares back.

Grumbling, he gives in to the urge and cracks the seal with a thumb, drawing blood. The old paper unravels over the desk, indigo lettering glowing lightly across the page.

Nothing else happens, and Tobirama’s interest flatlines. Groaning, the leopard rubs the bridge of his nose. He wanted the scroll to have something scientifically interesting. Perhaps information that would help his current study of time-space magic.

“Useless,” he mumbles as he gets up to head to his chest of old scrolls, twisting a wrist with a spell on his lips. The trunk opens, and several scrolls lift into the air. Humming, he picks through the offerings, but nothing catches his interest for now. Except for a groan, and a wash of magic erupts behind him.

Spinning around, he sees the magic twist and dance. It creates a beautiful sequence of numbers before water weighs in on his apartment. Fire follows, earth than air, and finally, a burst of light forces him to close his eyes lest he goes blind.

Magic dances on his skin playfully as if saying hello, and eventually, he gains the ability to open his eyes.

A winged man sits on his desk, a smirk dancing on his lips, and Tobirama feels the battle instincts kick in. This intruder will die.

“My, my, if it isn’t a snow leopard that’s a mage. Talented one too.” They speak with a voice deep as any ocean.

Tobirama’s tail flicks once in irritation but doesn’t move much after. Whoever this stranger was would be dead soon enough. If not by his magic circles, then by his hand.

“Get out,” he demands cooly, water pooling at his fingertips ready to drown and pull should he need to. However, the curious side of him calls Tobirama to stay his hand.

The stranger, with long dark hair, wings as dark as night, and delighted red eyes, simply smirks. Immediately his curiosity quiets, and water once again comes at his call with bits of lightning this time.

“Easy, it’s just been a while since a Hatake called. Not even a Senju. Your blood is strong, and I answered the call,” they say with their voice gaining a melodic tone.

Words of power, Tobirama notes, and slowly he relaxes.

“And may I ask the name of the one who answered my call?”

He didn’t call anyone, but he didn’t understand the writing on the scroll. No worries. He’ll deal with the consequences and remove it should this stranger become a threat.

“I am Madara,” they answer from their spot on his desk. “-and I’m your familiar.”

Tobirama scowls. Now he knows why his father always smirked. Familars were forever.

[tonberry-yoda]

Hello! I would love a MHA match up for the Mystery Date event! <3

I'm a pansexual cis-girl who goes by she/her pronuns!

I am a very affectionate girl who wants needs to let know everyone that they are loved and cared for ^^ I am the mother friend of the group and I love to take care of others, I just love to make everyone happy! (without forgetting my own happiness ofc 😌)

Leaving my caring part aside I am very active and I LOVE the feel of the adrenaline, I am this kind of person who just jumps on every roller coaster in a 5km radious. That also means that I love strong emotions, and that comes to strong activities, I would love to go bungee jumping or skydiving one day.

I dress in grunge style, I adore all the dark colours and aesthetic of the clothes under that name <3 I have to say that I dress grunge but still colorful! like, all the base of my outfit is black but then you see 7 bracelets of different colors forming a rainbow of bracelets in my wrist or a pair of rainbow clips in my hair.

I also love cozy and warm activities, like sitting with my partner in front of the television curled up in blankets inside of a pillow fort, sleeping together inside a cute pink tent installed in a corner of my room, doing skin-care routines or even my favorite one, brush each other's hair!!

My music tastes are very variate but my playlist is almost overshadowed by Marina and the Diamonds, Mitski, and Hombres G (a very good Spanish band <3).

My love language is physical touch, as you can see in what I've written before I'm a very cuddly and physical person who loves to share her love in hugs, kisses, acts like holding hands and all that cute things ^^ But I also love giving gifts!! And by gifts I mean from something shiny that I've found and that reminds me of my partner, from drawings I've made myself (because I live for drawing ^^), playlist dedicated to my partner, and handmade sweets or pastries to something I heard they wanted and bought them in the store <3

-with love, from 🇪🇸Anon. (HA! Bet ya didn't see that coming right? 😈) (Hope you are having a good day though, take care of yourself tonberry ♥)

notes 💌: OMG THIS WAS A SURPRISE! I was just reading through this and even picked you a character and was super surprised to see that it was from you, love <333 thank you so much for participating in this event because you have been nothing but kind to me, so to return that favor for you means the world to me <333 have a wonderful valentine's day and know that i am sending lots of love <3

THE CHARACTER CUPID CHOOSES FOR YOU THIS VALENTINE’S DAY IS…

MOMO!!!

i think having two mother friends in the group would be 10/10 tbh

i think both of your goals are to make everyone around you happy, so naturally, you two gravitated to each other

she will care for you and to have someone care for her means the world!!

she would love that active side of you

the two of you would just goof off outside while you both get your built up energy out

now the only thing is, i dont see her as a super daring person until someone else convinces her to do something super risky. she'll do it, but just know you got to convince her a bit

i think she would totally be down to try those fun risky things though

i dont call her a girlboss for nothing

she loves your style

she doesnt really have a style for herself, but to see you very confident in the clothes you love makes her so so happy

and she just thinks you look so good in everything you wear

SHE LOVES CUDDLING

just hearing you talk about wanting to cuddle next to a fire makes her blush

knowing that you want to do self care with her literally makes her so happy omg

like she could spend all day doing that, but with you??!?!?! you cant tell me she's not over the moon

she loves that you are just so sweet and cling onto her

she loves being the cuddle bug and having someone like you to tell her to take a break every once in a while

PLEASE MAKE HER HOMEMADE GIFTS

she knows they came straight from your heart, so they mean a lot more to her

plus she just thinks you're so talented that she gets all gushy whenever you get her a present

just know that you got yourself a lovely girl who loves every little thing about you <333

💌 HOW WOULD SHE ASK YOU TO BE HER VALENTINE??

she would write you a lovely hand written letter with pink pen that says some super lovely things about you and ends with "and will you be my valentine??" and when you say yes, she gives you chocolates and a teddy bear, a smile never leaving her beautiful face.

💌 VALENTINE’S DAY DATE

Momo wanted a chill day. The two of you had been training and working all week and the last thing you needed to do was go on some crazy adventure and call it a date, only to be both grumpy and exhausted. And you agreed. You were both just wanting some self care time. You both took the day off just to be together and when you woke up, it was already heaven. Momo had brought you breakfast in bed and planted kisses all over your face. "Today is going to be an amazing day," she had said, laying down next to you to eat breakfast as well. "It sure will be." You agreed, making a satisfied sound as you took your first bite of breakfast. "I have the perfect plan for the day!" Momo sounded so excited. You hadn't heard her sound like this in ages. It was probably because she slept in for the first time in a long time to be honest. She pulled out her journal and showed her the plans for the day and you smiled. It all sounded perfect. Every last bit of it. You couldn't wait to be curled up in your girlfriend's arms just sitting next to the fireplace in your living room. The day went nicely. Lots of good food, hugs and kisses every couple minutes, skin care, etc. It was just so relaxing. You hadn't even noticed that the sun had gone down until you were in Momo's arms, wrapped in a blanket talking about the future. Her arms were so warm pressed to yours and you couldn't help but place kisses up and down her hands and face. "Momo, I love you." Momo gave you a loving look and pulled you closer, placing a kiss onto your forehead. "I love you too. Oh, and Happy Valentine's Day." <3

~~~~~

mystery date rules | pinned post @tonberry-yoda

[boyakishantriage]

"M'kay, it's been ten minutes. We're moving in."

The teacher in training began, a parent immediately voicing complaint.

"Excuse me. But-"

"Pardon?"

"My- Er. What?"

"Are you the teacher?"

"No, but how-"

"shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh."

Leaning at the woman, masculine features retreating as she gripped the desk.

"I-"

"I said shhhhhh. Hey, uhm. Little girl."

"I beg your pardon. He is-"

Shoving a finger over the parent, pushing her down into her seat as she continued.

"Little girl. Hey, can you look up at me?"

The young tween looked up.

"ok, so. I'm going to ask you questions, yes do this. No do this understand?"

Doing a thumbs up and down respectively, turning mid sentence. A finger held in the air.

The girl lifted her thumb up.

"Do you mind me calling you a girl?"

She pointed pulled a thumb up, then down. Before turning it sideways.

"... Everyone, not the adults. Little dudes, do you mind me calling you little girl?"

"I MUST PROTEST!"

She shoved a block of chalk into her mouth.

"And I said. Shush. I'm trying to teach your DAUGHTER miss. YOUR DAUGHTER. HOW TO SPEAK FOR HERSELF. IF YOU DONT WANT ME TO DO MY JOB, LEAVE WITH HER. Sweetie, sorry about that. Everyone. I'm sorry about that. Little girl, do you want to stay?"

Twinkles in her eyes, she put both thumbs up. A grin on her face.

"No you don't. We are-"

And to everyone's shock, the little girl slapped her mother.

"I'm going to ignore that. Uhhh, huh. Ok, every. Hands down. Raise your hand like this, hands to the sky like we're gonna steal some stars. If. Hands down everyone. Why everyone's a cheeky little bugger aren't they?"

Smiling, she continued with her hand stretching.

"Ok. If you don't know or care what I call you, stretch you hand to steal some stars."

Most of the room raised hands, both of them. Some parents copying while the other woman stood up and marched out.

"Right. Ok, so. Uhhh, everyone, hands down-"

"Miss Chang."

"Ah, uhm. Hmm, sorry mr Rotsworth, I need to set up an activity-"

"Miss Chang. Please."

"MR ROTWORTH. OH MY GODS, DEAR HEAVENS WHY ON EARTH ARE YOU"

Coughing, she snorted.

"Yep. I can't hold that voice. Mr Rotsworth, I am aware that... Woman had asked me to be fired, but I am incapable of solving the issue unless I-"

"YOU STUPID SLUT WHY DON'T-"

Grabbing the woman's wrist, she slammed her onto the table. Sighing, she kicks the woman's stomach. Causing her to groan.

"Sorry about this, everyone. Oh my god, look. It's Mr Rotsworth. Sir."

"... Hello kids, I'm Mr Rotsworth!"

Slamming her into the table, she leaned in close.

"HOW DARE-"

"listen here. I'm the fucking teacher. This is an exercise and if I have to, I'll break your fucking arm in front of your daughter and leave you hanging off the fucking balcony. Let me set up my fucking class, or you'll find why mediaeval torture was banned. Ok?"

She stood back up, letting the woman go.

"You are-"

She shattered her wrist, shoving the chalk back into her mouth.

"MISS SILVIA! No, don't eat that! Mr Rotsworth, please held her to the office. Dear me. Anyways, kids back to desks please. Ah, right. Miss Cambridge, didn't see you there. Would you mind getting some paper for me?"

"er. Why?"

"Well, I don't think we draw in school property Mrs Cambridge. Kids, oh. You already sat down. Hmm, well talk between yourselves."

As soon as she closed the door, Cambridge backed off as the woman immediately bombarded her.

"HOW DARE YOU BREAK MY WRIST-"

"ma'am, as a fellow human being with half a brain. Before you go off. Please lower your voice, kindergarteners are in that room taking a nap, a test is occuring upstairs and your daughter may be able to hear you. Mr Rotsworth, is this door sound proofed?"

"No Miss Chang."

"mmm, your daughter will likely be able to hear you. So, I suggest you calm down."

She snapped her wrist back into place, shooing miss Cambridge to fetch paper and coloured pencils.

"How dare you. How dare you hurt an aristoctat, and a transexual. I shall have you fired, your reputation torn to shreds and you will be stripped of all your accolades and awards."

"Ok. Mr Rotsworth, you may stand witness to this."

The man nodded, taking a seat between the pair.

"Actually, is there a spare classroom sir?"

[werewolf-goat]

Lewis was arriving home from the bakery shop, he was exhausted and feeling kinda worn out, and to top it off his niece and sister were coming to visit later, and he was in no mood to make snacks, but alas, he wasnt about to let that get to him.

He was still dressing from his shower when he heard a knock on the door, it was the guests! Oh well whatever, mugcakes it is.

"Uncle Lewis!" with a big jump his niece huged him breathless.

"Ugh hi Sophie" said Lewis as he was regaining his breathing.

"Lewis you showered! To what do I owe this honour?" smirked his sister, hand in chest.

"Haha, keep talking Hannah, maybe you'll recover your snack privileges" said as he invited them to come in

. . .

Sophie was drawing on the kitchen table, the mugs where empty and so were some plates with small dropplets of syrup and soft crumbs.

"So you guys been talking lately?" asked Hannah.

"Not that much, he says theyve been having some trouble with the wi-fi, so we mostly just text" said Lewis while he fidgeted with his coffee mug.

"Yeah, field jobs are always a pain with that. World wide coverage my ass"

Lewis let a gentle chuckle, before taking a sip off his coffee and stared blankly at the table.

"Thanks for checking up on me by the way"

"Don't mention it, we both know how it is to miss people don't we" Hannah putting a hand on his. Lewis let a sigh and looked at the TV.

"Oh by the way, I have like 5 different movies that Sophie might like on my watch list" he stood up to clear the plates up "I'll get some popcorn ready"

"Ugh, suit yourself, don't know how you can eat this much" said Hannah letting herself sink on the couch, Belly up. Sophie ran towards the kitchen demanding to let her see the kernells pop.

Hannah quickly sat up to grab the remote, as the pure and blissful silence of the living room made her uneasy, turning on the TV. It had been left on the news station, where they were reporting a fire. She didnt want to upset herself either so she changed the channel to a program where there was a documentary about the largest ships ever made. Odd to see the titanic on the list but she guessed it still had its merits after so many other ships being made. Then, she heard a scream from the kitchen.

"What happened!?" asked Hannah as she skidded right into the island, where Sophie was grabbing her palm and her brother was filling a bowl with water

"She wanted to put the kernels into the pan and burnt herself a bit" he put his nieces hand in the bowl

"Oh my god Sophie you gotta be careful" said Hannah raising her voice, Sophie looking down and apologizing

"Don't worry Hannah it was just some drops, she'll be fine"

"Yeah yeah I know" said Hannah returning to the Living room, Lewis and Sophie interchanging looks.

"Hey, everything alright?" asked Lewis as he followed her

"Yeah is just" Hannah was sitting with her hand on her forehead "She's been wanting to do more around the house and I'm afraid she'll hurt herself"

"Well she's a big girl, and I'm sure you can use the help"

"Yes but I dont want her to" snapped Hannah "I'm supossed to be there for her, she doesnt need a useless mom, not like us"

"Hannah youre exaggerating"

"Lewis dont you remember how it used to be, only you and me keeping that house together while--"

"I know" Lewis cutting her off "And its not going to be like that. You and Sophie are a team ok" Lewis was the one putting a hand on her this time "Just like us".

"I hate this, I need him to be here" said Hannah. Lewis hugged her as he started tearing up "Yeah.. Me too"

"Mom I'm sorry" said Sophie Shyly aproaching the scene. Her mom hugged her apologizing as well

. . .

"Ok we're ready" said Hannah as her and Sophie sank in the sofa in front of the TV, Lewis was coming out of the kitchen to press the play button when suddently the lights went off.

"Son of a bitch" said Sophie, her mom slapping her wrist "Ow! How did you know it was me?" her mom rolled her eyes, leaving Sophie with no tangible answer.

In that moment, an alert rang in both of their phones, with a loud buzz it read the following:

SPACE DEBREE WARNING

EVACUATE TO NEAREST BUNKER IMMEDIATELY

They all started packing up their stuff, and as they got out of their house they saw it, multiple meteor like lights in the night sky slowly falling, some of them bigger than others.

They Ran towards the neighborhood bunker, and began to go down the long stairwell

"Yo Lewis!" said a neightboor coming from behind, hugging him "Lewis I'm so sorry"

Lewis blood began running cold as he pushed him away "Sorry? What do you mean sorry what happened?"

The neighboor realised his mistake as his face went pale "Sorry I thought you knew" said as he started reaching for his phone, promptly giving it to him with a saved video "Here, you have to watch this"

"We're here at Genesis Energy space station, where a massive explosion has engulfed the right side of the complex in flames, one of the biggest fires in decades since the Titanic Spacecruise went ablaze thanks to a stray meteorite. We are recieving the reports of multiple casualties, as the remaining enginners struggle to keep the remaining of the station operational against authorities advice. Experts believe that the damage sustained to the complex will cause it to fall down to earth in the next 5 hours if the fire is not contained, in our opinion, thi-- WHOAH GET D--"

The video ended with another explosion close to the camera. Lewis and Hannah could only watch in horror and silence, as they knew both their husbands were in this very moment, raining from the skies.

We repeat. Get to a secure shelter and stay inside until the all clear is called. Do not leave your shelter under any circumstances. Meteorologists have confirmed confirm that, after roughly 10:30, for the first time in history, it’s gonna start raining men.

[typed-out]

Blank Slate- A personal essay

WARNING: MENTIONS/DESCRIPTIONS OF SELF HARM AND FEELINGS OF DREPRESSION

TAKE CAUTION WHILE READING

I wish I was broken.

I can feel that I'm not, I can feel that I can keep fighting.

I'm so tried.

But I have to keep fighting.

I wish there was a visual indicator of how I feel.

But there's nothing.

I feel angry. I want to prove that I am suffering, prove I need help, prove that I feel like I am treading water, seconds from drowning.

I strip naked and hold a razor over my wrist.

'You're just doing it for atttention', I think to myself, and I hate myself a little more.

I don't want attention. Not like that. I don't want someone to ask or notice.

I want someone to save me.

I put the razor down.

Self harm destroys lives, kills people.

I'm so lucky that I don't do it.

Why don't I feel lucky?

I feel disgusting. What's wrong with me?

I feel angry. I'm not broken enough to hurt but I want to be.

If I'm broken, I can be fixed.

If there are physical wounds, then it's real, not in my head.

My eyes water. I'm so angry. I hate myself.

I am broken. I can prove it.

I pick the razor back up. I feel fury, burning like fire in my chest and behind my eyes.

I hold the razor to my thigh. It can't be for attention if no one can see it.

I make one small cut. It stings badly.

A pearl of blood rises up as i watch.

I've heard that self harm can be addicting, the the release can feel so good you won't want to stop.

It can be dangerous.

I wait for the feeling to wash over me, for the urge to cut again comes.

It never does. The cut stings, and I don't want anymore.

I hold the razor to my thigh, but I can't force myself to cut again.

I'm too weak, even for this.

I want to scream. I want to cry. I want to explode, push everything out until i break the windows and everyone feels my wind.

I throw the razor away.

I put my earbuds in and let the sounds drown everything out.

I pace around my apartment, just to move, just to expel some energy.

I close my eyes and imagine I am a singer.

I'm on stage, and everyone is clapping. I'm not nervous; I'm excited. My heart is pounding and i give a brilliant performance. It's not flawless, but my fans like my hiccups because it reminds them I'm real.

At the end, I cry and bow, and thank everyone.

I imagine I am a hero on a quest. I was chosen, but I dont want to be. I have friends willing to come with me. I have an enemy focused on stopping me, but I am stronger and better. I struggle, but my friends help and we push through. I return home victorious yet humble.

I find love, and I win the gratitude of the people around me.

I imagine I am hurt, badly. I can't stand or move, and the pain is crushing me. But there's someone there, who lifts me up and promises everything will be okay. They sound panicked, worried about me, and I know they would do anything to make sure I'm alright.

I'm in a hospital bed, and they're beside me, holding my hand and crying out if joy that I'll make it.

My earbuds die.

I pull them out.

I'm not angry anymore.

Or sad.

Or frustrated.

I am nothing.

I feel numb, like an empty bottle.

The music doesn't fill me up, but I don't fill me up either.

I'm a blank slate, waiting for color.

I'm not broken, I'm whole, but I'm not complete.

That's okay.

I don't need to be.

When I am blank, I can pretend to be anything, draw any expression on my fave and maintain it.

This is the best way to be.

Later, I will jolt and be afraid of how empty I felt. I will cry and tremble and scroll on my phone till I remember how to be normal.

But for now, I feel nothing.

I sit on the couch and pull a blanket over my legs.

There's one cut on my thigh. It already stopped bleeding. It will be gone in a few days.

I'll be okay then.

I close my eyes.

This is what it feels like to be okay.

[stinkybrowndogs]

Fr the gov needs to give me my money.... me and my 11$ r not gonna make it the next 6 months

[albireon]

WIP 1/31/22

[heartfullofleeches]

hi heartfullofleeches its my b'day today and i honestly feel nothing so i wanted to ask how the supernatural harem celebrates reader's b'day? totally ignore it if it's not possible love u mwah <3

(Happy birthday! Hope this is to your liking)

"Quiet, you'll wake them before it's time."

"I don’t see why we're doing this now anyway when we can do it in the morning."

"Shut up, asshole, we have to start from the second the day begins."

You wake in the middle of the night due to commotion overhead. The faint smell of burning wax hits you before you're fully conscious. Opening your eyes, you see your three housemates hovering over you; a large tray in the arms of the demon.

"Wha...?"

All three individuals look down at you.

"Happy birthday!"

"Happy birthday..."

"Happy birthday, sweetheart."

The lights flicker on, Alasdair and Maddox sitting at the end of your bed, while Baron places a large cake in your lap with enough candles you were almost glad the fire alarm had been out of order for the past month. You look towards the clock; exactly on the dot of midnight - the technical start of a new day.

"Happy birthday, Y/n." Alasdair repeats. "It's been a pleasure to spend the time we've had together. I never imagined I'd celebrate this occasion with you, but I still plan to make it a memorable day."

Baron cuts him off. "He says that, but they both tried to stop me from waking you up."

"Regardless.." Maddox murmurs. "It's still a moment we're all happy to share with you. I'm... happy to be here for you. Being able to celebrate the life of your loved one is.. nice."

Baron grips your shoulders, nudging you in the direction of the came. "Blow out the candles so we can give you your first gifts."

Giving Maddox and Alasdair a second glance; you notice items in their hand. One, a sketchbook and the other a small box. Taking a deep breath, you blow out the candles; the small crowd clapping in cheer.

Alasdair is first, sliding the box across the bed. Upon opening it, you find a dagger about the length of your middle finger to your wrist. It had a golden handle, and a silver blade; decorated in small gems. A figure of a snake sat around the base of the blade; its jaws unhinged.

"It's a blade blessed by one of the highest ranking angels. With how the world is, carrying a little protection is needed sometimes."

Maddox is next, placing the sketchbook in your lap for you to see as they look down at their lap. Flipping through the pages, you find various drawings of yourself, ranging from realistic to their own style.

"I've got into art a while ago, and Alasdair said I had some talent in it, and you're the only thing I've been drawing recently so I thought you wouldn't mind if I did a few for you.. Hope you like it."

Baron holds his hand out to you, feeling wrapping his gift was unnecessary. Nestled in his large palm is a locket. Oval in shape, and fitted with a red gem in its center - swirling patterns engraved around it. It looked a bit dated in age, but had been freshly polished. He sheepishly rubs his neck as you take it. There's a small photo inside of the four of you or the best resemblance of one. It was from a time when you tried to take one, and it came out as good as anyone would expect. Absolute chaos.

"Dont worry, I have cooler stuff planned for later. It's may not much, but it's something personal to me and so I want you to have it.

You put the locket on, pendant falling to your chest. "I like it. Thank you, all of you."

They gather around to give you a hug. Baron on one side, Alasdair the other, and Maddox in front as the cake is moved aside. As he stands up, Alasdair takes your hand and places a kiss on the back of your palm.

"There will be more time to celebrate later. We'd like to give space to rest for your special day, but hope you don't mind us staying beside you tonight."