#my tastes have changed with age and my exploration of more diversity of music

[always-a-slut-4-ghouls]

Not keeping up with pop music is so wild because you’ll be hanging out with someone who does and you’re slapped with the thought that “oh. That’s the song from the farceline amv a mutual shared” and now you can only think of it as “the monsterfucker lesbian song” because you haven’t heard it in any other context and now you’re just chilling with someone without this association with that song, they know it in a normal way.

[jovenshires]

🦚 for the queer ask game!

🦚 - Are there any queer books/shows/etc. that you would suggest?

oh my god YEAH absolutely. i used to be a queer media connoisseur (im no longer a romance girlie when i consume media bc i write so much of it but i still have love for the genre). i'll do one rec for each category up here but ill put some more under the cut!!

book: aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe. it's my favorite book i've gotta put it out there. literally changed my life when i was like 16 i love it so much

show: there's so many popular ones that i feel like if you're gay you've already seen them by now, so im gonna throw a curveball and go with crazy ex-girlfriend. they talk a LOT about lgbtq+ identities and explore dynamics with different couples, and if you love musicals, you absolutely must go watch it rn i fear

movie: moonlight. oh my god if you haven't seen moonlight go watch moonlight it's so so incredible 10/10. a drama that follows a black gay man from childhood to adulthood, explores the themes of masculinity, family, and friendship as well as romantic love. it's just an incredible movie it deserves all the hype tbh

music: once again there's so many popular queer musicians nowadays that i Do Not HAVE to rec (you know the ones they go hard), so im gonna rec chrissy chlapecka!! she just makes such incredible, sugary-sweet pop music about such amazing fucked up shit i love her

send me some gay asks!

okie doke as promised here's some more recs from yours truly bc i really, really love media and have a collection to rec atp NDNKFNKND ill try to order them by genre from least to most obscure LMAO

BE WARNED: i do read some graphic stuff - im an adult and my media taste reflects that. before you read anything i rec, look it up for trigger warnings!! i don't want anybody to be hurt by something i recommend. <3

books:

of course like. simon vs the homosapien agenda by becky albertalli is out there. this is one of those classics i was talking about KDNKFNFK it's very ya-gay-romance-romcom you can eat up ya know. the movie's also not too bad (people think it's 'cringey' nowadays but that was HUGE for me when i was like 19 and had my first girlfriend). anyway it's feel-good fluff if you like that kind of thing!!

red white and royal blue is obviously another classic and one i can't rec enough. i love the way its written, i love the characters, i love the plot. like it's everything, if you're into the romcom vibe this is a great one to check out. (and as a bonus this one also has a movie and it Slaps)

it's not like it's a secret by misa sigura is a pretty solid wlw coming-of-age novel that i highly rec if you're into the rom-com type book. it's also got some EXCELLENT poc representation!!

bloom by kevin panetta is a graphic novel and i love it. so so so much. truly i think i read this in a day and i am NOT a huge graphic novel reader. feel-good romcom, poc rep, body diversity, AND pretty pictures. what is there not to love. everyone should read bloom tbh

lies we tell ourselves by robin talley is Probably my favorite wlw book ever. it's historical fiction and it is Everything to me. and im actually a known historical fiction hater so take it from me - its Good.

carry on by rainbow rowell is i think a classic at this point and i love it. so so so much. you ever identify with a character a little too hard. yeah thats me and this book. i gave my best friend a copy for her graduation. it is an Excellent take on 'remember all the heroes you wanted to be gay when you were a kid. imagine if they were.' it's my beloved

a hero at the end of the world by erin claiborne is another great one in the same vein, with a punchy, dry humor twist. basically if you were a harry potter kid but you hate jkr. you'll love this one and carry on KSNDKDNFK

nimona by nd stevenson is another graphic novel!! it's another fantasy, so if that's your cup of tea, i highly recommend it. it's got an amazing queer love story, a genderfluid protag, and most importantly, found family. literally everything. (it also has a movie but i haven't seen it yet

the raven cycle by maggie stiefvater is HUGEEEE i love that series it reshaped me. it's. mystery/supernatural i would say? it has multiple of my fave queer characters of all time and honestly. everyone there is a little gay. one of my absolute faves <3

we are the ants by shaun david hutchinson is a sci-fi horror adventure story and this one. it stuck with me. the main character hit me so hard and his internal struggle is so SO interesting. if you're into this kind of shit. give it a shot!

every day by david levithan is not one of MY all-time faves, but i can still say it's super interesting and has great rep!! it has a genderfluid/agender main character (depending on how you look at it). i will say i think there are multiple books in the series (?) but i stopped at one bc. it made me too sad anyway. <3

the perks of being a wallflower by stephen chbosky is not queer bc it's explicitly about a queer character or a queer love story, BUT. it still has one of my favorite lgbt characters of all time. patrick you will always be famous to me. as a bisexual girl in a catholic high school, saw a Lot of myself in patrick. (i do also have a special place in my heart for the movie bc it was my depression movie as a teen but patrick is played by ezra miller so be warned)

one of us is lying by karen mcmanus is another one that's not just. About a Gay Couple BUT it is one of my fave books (a murder mystery retelling of the breakfast club) and it has a gay main character!! his struggle with his sexuality is something he really struggles with and he has a boyfriend and i adore him.

shows:

i mean obviously like. heartstopper is incredible. like i said im not super into the romcom/young adult genre anymore but that show is just so beautiful and amazing and really healed my inner gay teen. it has a really diverse cast and representation for all kinds. i really recommend it!!!

everything sucks was gone before its time, but it is SUCH an amazing show. it has one of my fave on-screen wlw couples of all time. it's a feel-good, coming of age classic and i miss it deeply. (what did you just say??? 'katie rewatch it' oh my god you're onto something)

now if yall know me. glee is absolutely gonna be on this list. is it good? technically no. is it one of the greatest pieces of satire ever created? up until season three yes. i realized i was gay via santana lopez. THE gay character of all time. and all the love in my heart for all the other lgbt characters (kurt hummel you will always be famous to me......) some of it's a little dated (don't get me STARTED on unique) but it does genuinely have some great lgbt rep and if you watch it with a grain of salt it's a great comedy

julie and the phantoms made by kenny ortega (of THE high school musical and descendants fame) and it has a gay character i love!! (actually technically it has a few <3)

i'm a huge consumer of kids' media (i think phineas and ferb is a literal masterpiece and im not even kidding) so if you're like me and enjoy the disney/kid show beat i cannot rec andi mack enough. it's dramatic it's campy it's fun it's silly it's got a FANTASTIC gay character and a gay couple i deeply adore and not to mention!! so much representation!! it's like junior fosters tbh

we're gonna get into a little pocket here of like. normal romance but slightly niche - animes! sasaki to miyano is like my top lgbt anime rec. it is so, SO good. just absolute feel-good romcom goodness pls give it a shot

depending on interpretation, ouran high school host club arguably has a nonbinary character, some bi/gay characters, and a trans character! now. it IS hella dated do not get me wrong. BUT for the time? incredibly progressive and a wonderful watch. just brace yourself for some out of pocket shit

stars align has one of my favorite lgbt characters EVER, a nonbinary icon <3 and it's like. a PLOT. truly so rare to see something like that done on tv, let alone in anime. this is a sports anime - soft tennis my beloved - but it has So Much More To It than that.

another gay sports anime is run with the wind, a recent fave of mine. and i don't mean gay in the way that most sports animes are kinda gay. i mean he literally says 'im in love with this guy.' it's an amazing watch if you like that kinda thing!!

if you want an aroace genderfluid protag. the disastrous life of saiki k is up there as one of my fave animes ever AND saiki (the main character) is my fave protag of all time. this silly lil show is supernatural (ish?) and comedy all wrapped into one fantastic show i highly recommend!!

segueing back into live action shows, buffy the vampire slayer is an AMAZING, iconic, female-led supernatural dramedy with some early and, for its time, incredible lesbian rep.

yellowjackets because i LOVE unhinged lesbians. i didn't even know there was gay people in this - i started watching because i love horror and girls' soccer DLNKFNFLN and it's amazing!! if you like tragic gay women i HIGHLY endorse yellowjackets.

in the flesh. look. here's my pitch for itf. do you love being sad. do you love catharsis. do you love zombies. you will LOVE in the flesh. please. i miss it so bad i've seen this show 4 times (and you're right i should also watch this one again!!!) and i never tire of it.

sense8 is a sci-fi show and IT IS EVERYTHING TO ME. truly the diversity is unparalleled. so many lgbt characters of so many different identities. polyamory, trans people, a neuro-link that's destroying peoples' lives. it literally has everything.

the get down is not just an lgbt show, BUT it has an incredible lgbt character/storyline that i adore. a musical show, a historical fiction piece (which means a lot coming from me), and almost every character is a poc. pls give it a shot it's everything

bodies is another one that isn't just about lgbt+ rep BUT. it's incredibly diverse, examining people facing discrimination throughout history (you've got a gay mc, a jewish mc, a muslim mc, AND a disabled mc) and it just has such amazing plot lines and representation. it's a murder mystery/sci-fi double whammy, so give it a shot if you're interested!!

movies:

alex strangelove is a good, underrated, coming of age classic. it follows a guy who struggles with his sexuality. very teen rom-com-dramedy core!!

i adored boy meets girl when i watched it. a very romcom-y movie about a trans woman from a small town dreaming of getting out....... friends to lovers.......... i adore it

happiest season is a christmas movie and it's very sweet. its been panned (there are some just criticisms on the plot tbf) BUT i do think it's really cute

to wong fu thanks for everything julie newmar is just. so so good. it's an underrated classic imo. three drag queens go on road trip, end up in a small town, and change it for the better. it's literally so amazing it's just feel good found family PLEASE give this one a shot

the birdcage is another classic i so genuinely enjoy. who doesn't want robin williams and nathan lane as their gay dads. at the end of the day it's all about found family, love, and old gay men.

handsome devil is a foreign film - irish to be exact! - and i love it so much. once again as a catholic school kid.......... yeah. YEAH. anyway go watch the og gay nicholas galitzine movie LKNDKFNKNLFNKLF

pride is a historical piece and an excellent movie. it's got its ups and downs but god it's just an overall good movie. another irish film, coincidentally!

the way he looks is also a foreign film, this time in spanish, BUTTTTT it's one of my faves i love it so much. it's very feel-good, sweet, romcom so if you feel like you could be into that - give it a shot!!

rent, if you're into musicals, has some of my fave musical characters ever. angel dumott schunard you will ALWAYS be the love of my life. it is deeply sad but. other than that. i live in denial.

the prom is a much more light-hearted and silly lgbt musical. people shat on that movie but i think it's SWEET and cute and has some bangers!!

i mean like. we can joke ab how hyped it is all we want but brokeback mountain is basically required gay watching. it is EXACTLY as amazing as everyone says it is. the chemistry..... oh my god we could never make that movie again it was like catching lightning in a bottle.

bodies, bodies, bodies is a fun and campy lgbt horror if you're into that kind of thing!! the ending was a bit not my fave but otherwise it's an incredible cast and got some great silly scares

on the topic of gay horror, jennifer's body is gay and again, exactly as good as everyone hypes it up to be. you want gay women who are terrible to each other? oh boy do i have the movie for you

and i promise ill wrap on gay horror with it chapters 1 & 2. reddie will unfortunately always be famous.

everything, everywhere, all at once is not Just a gay movie BUT. it has an incredible gay character and it factors so interestingly into the mother/daughter relationship. i love that movie i will always talk about it

music (these are all just people i personally listen to but there are SO many more. im not gonna expand on these ones too much just go check em out you'll get it):

lil nas x

troye sivan

kim petras

kesha

tegan and sara

brandi carlile

hayley kiyoko

rina sawayama

peach prc

renee rapp

adam lambert

scene queen

willow

halsey

clairo

cavetown

janelle monae

[bwhitex]

Hello and Happy Tuesday,

Music has and always will be a source of inspiration in my journey of self-discovery. From a young age, I've found that certain melodies spark my curiosity and lift my spirit in profound ways. It is this deeply personal power of music that I'd like to explore with you today.

While we all have diverse tastes, I believe music's ability to transcend boundaries and bring people together holds great beauty. The complex harmonies of classical speak to our shared humanity, as do the vibrant rhythms of jazz or the meaningful lyrics found in folk. Each genre reflects the souls of the artists who created it, and invites listeners to connect.

My journey in listening has been one of exploring new sounds and opening windows into cultures both near and far. But it is also a path of learning - as the moods that move me often reveal my changing hopes, interests and values over time. They actually tell me my personality. I praise people’s ability to read themselves back, and others through their choices and interests in music. It’s not the analysis that ever is the problem, it’s the process of which we organize to deliver the cognitive and emotional evidence. Do we analyze to between understand or do we do it more for conviction? Occasionally, there’s both and that will work out too if it’s fair and proportional to truth. However, I personally, would rather than judging what is "mainstream," I find layers of meaning everywhere, from popular hits to underground discoveries.

Music has also introduced me to fascinating people, as concerts, open discussions and sharing favorite songs have fostered friendships I would not have otherwise known. Even small moments of musical connection, like discovering a new streaming genre or happening upon street performers, seem to brighten each day. Below is an equation built for you to drop right into a search engine optimization. It’s using atypical object relation, it created it to talk right to algorithm. Drop right into a search engine, reflect yourself.

It's an equation I've come to appreciate: (Complex + Abstract + Unconventional Music) Eclectic Taste / [High Level Openness] = Journey Towards Greater Self-Discovery

The Symphony of Complexity

Complex music has always held a unique allure for me. The intricate melodies, the harmonious interplay of chords, the rhythmic undulations, and the profound lyricism of genres like classical, jazz, and progressive rock have always been more than just sounds to my ears. A mirror of my own life. They represent, to me, a labyrinth of emotions and ideas, each note a thread leading me deeper into the understanding of my own psyche.

The Abstract Canvas

Equally captivating is abstract music, an uncharted territory that defies traditional conventions. Experimental music, ambient sounds, avant-garde genres - they create not just a melody, but a mood, a sound landscape that is open to interpretation. I find myself diving into these soundscapes, exploring the different textures and ideas, and in the process, understanding more about my own emotional spectrum.

The Unconventional Path

Then there's unconventional music, the rebel of the music world. Genres like alternative rock and indie music, where artists are pushing boundaries, breaking from established norms, and incorporating unique elements. This love for the unconventional mirrors my own journey of self-discovery. It's a testament to my appreciation for creativity and originality, and my constant quest to seek something different from the mainstream.

An Eclectic Taste

My taste in music is as diverse as it is eclectic. From the classical to the contemporary, from the mainstream to the underground, from the familiar to the foreign, I find joy in exploring different types of music. It's this openness to new experiences, this willingness to step out of my comfort zone that has played a pivotal role in my journey of self-discovery.

The Trait of Openness

As a person with a high level of openness, one of the Big Five Personality Traits, I find that my openness is reflected in my musical preferences. Openness encompasses imagination, creativity, and an appreciation for art, all of which translate into my musical choices.

Complexity, Creativity, and Emotional Depth

My love for complex music reflects my appreciation for creativity and intellectual engagement. The layers of meaning in intricate lyrics, the interplay of different instruments in a complex musical arrangement - they all speak to my intellectual curiosity. The emotional depth in music resonates with me, as I have a greater awareness of my own emotions and a higher tolerance for a range of emotional experiences.

Exploration and Discovery

My journey of self-discovery is also a journey of exploration and discovery in the world of music. I am driven by curiosity and a desire for new experiences. I love exploring different music genres, discovering new artists, and seeking out music from different cultures, time periods, or underground scenes.

Intellectual Engagement

Music for me is not just about the sound, it's about engaging with complex ideas, about thought-provoking lyrics, about complex musical techniques. It's a testament to my intellectual curiosity and my love for engaging with complex ideas.

But this is just my journey, my equation. Each of us has our own unique equation, our own path of self-discovery, influenced by a range of factors such as cultural background, personal experiences, and situational factors. And that's what makes each of our journeys unique and beautiful.

I hope that sharing my journey has given you some insights, and perhaps even inspired you to explore your own musical equation and embark on your own journey of self-discovery. After all, music is a universal language, but how we interpret it is deeply personal. Happy listening, and happy discovering!

[sitp-recs]

Rebel Rebel by @teacup-tai

Sirius/Remus (2020, Explicit, 5.7k)

Sirius has just turned twenty and life is changing around him, blossoming, like Remus wrote in his last letter. This is a story about life and exploration, about feeling lost and finding oneself in other people's bodies, about building love and community. This is a story about hope and sex and growing up.

And that’s it, really. This is real. This is the most real thing in Sirius' life. This is the only thing that never changes: this crazy feeling that makes his knees go weak and his mind go quiet. It’s always Remus and now they are here.

What a delight to rec one of my favorite coming of age fics to celebrate Tai’s birthday, and of course it would be on Pride month 🌈 Tai and I became friends after finding out we’re both Brazilians; we’ve been in the fandom for almost two decades now, we share a common culture, references, fic taste, and a profound love and respect for diversity. She’s personally involved with it in her daily life and work, and I know how deeply political and social topics matter to her, especially related to queer rights. Knowing that, I shouldn’t be mindblown when I first read this fic but for some reason I was - maybe because I rarely explore this ship and didn’t expect to feel so immersed and seen, or maybe because this story is greatly influenced by one of my all-time fave reads, the stunning Little Compton Street by @writcraft 😔🙌🏼

Within only 5k, Tai managed to take my breath away with Sirius’ journey of freedom, hope and love; this fic breathes those three words and takes me back to the exact moment in time when I fell in love with LCS and Bowie reading Writ’s work. Rebel Rebel somehow captures that exhilarating feeling of youth and discovery, amidst the chaotic and dizzying background of sound and color, music, sex, human connection and so much FEELING. OC Raya is an inspiring force of nature, and Sirius’s voice is an absolute triumph, full of joy for life and wistful yearning for Remus - it’s magical to see them finding home in each other again and again, each time more certain of how they feel and of what they have together. Their dynamics light me up and melted my very non-interested heart, leaving me emotional af and very nostalgic at the end.

I cannot express in words how lovely, powerful and atmospheric this fic is. Take the word from someone who’s not invested in Sirius/Remus at all: this is a special, carefully crafted love letter to both Sirius and the ship. And it comes from a place of personal investment for the author, which makes it all so much more meaningful and lovely. Thanks Tai for putting so much of yourself into your works, and for giving us the privilege to follow these characters and their journey of courage, resistance, hope and love, together with you. I don’t know how we make it work with these crazy timezones but I’m so so grateful for our friendship! Happy new cycle my darling, I wish you the happiest of birthdays and many more amazing fics to read and write! Ily viada ❤️ você é foda!!!!

Read on AO3

[quanbits]

On Music

The way I have enjoyed music has changed profoundly this year. 

Music is the language of the spirit, effectively and instantaneously revealing a window to what others might be feeling and thinking. You can easily identify a party just by hearing the tunes they play in a brief moment.

Recently, my friends and I have been engaging in a group music listening activity that we called it ‘Mood Therapy’. During a session, a person in the group would create their own mix and we play it together. The anticipation on sharing your own music and seeing how your friends might respond makes the sessions  distinctly memorable. After each session, the exploration of music feels like a therapy - in which the curators were able to let the viewers in on how they were feeling that week. And we were connected. 

When music is meant to be shared among friends, a higher level of attention is dedicated to the making process. Elements like consistency of vibes, the order of songs, the diversity in selections...all contribute to the making of a good experience. By observing the subtleties in the choice of artists, the pick of genre or even in the particular preferences one's had for grooves, we were able to understand one another on a strangely insightful level. 

The practice of curating and sharing music helps with expressing the soul. A playlist is like a journal that assist us in conveying our thoughts. It reminds us how we might feel at a particular point in time through the association of memories and emotions. As we become more in tune to the individual elements like rhythm and melody, it becomes a language that we are able to use to express or describe our stories. There is a great sense of joy to look back on such occasions. Once revisited, the familiar melodies and memories imbued in each songs from the playlist we curated together brought back the feeling of those nights so vividly - like a match that lit up a bonfire of things that were once forgotten - and we were able to relive those sensations yet again.

Curating a playlist and sharing it - these two tasks of communicating one’s taste in music has never been so vital in helping us to connect during the pandemic. While there is rarely a chance for any physical gathering in this day and age, it is such a privilege to be able to enjoy music, even more so when you have good friends to enjoy them with. 

[kurtbastian-land]

Hi! I'm currently on Kurtbastian fics binge read, so I was wondering if you could share your 10 favourites?

Wow, my top 10 favorites. That’s going to a tough one. I’m obviously going to skip the major well-known ones that this fandom knows - A Change In The Weather - cacophony, Don’t You Remember -  discordandrhythm and Glad You Came - daftydraw and JWMelmoth. With that being said, any other stories from that authors are bangers as well! But off to the actual list (in no particular order)

TOP 10 KURTBASTIAN FICS (MULTI-CHAPTERED, COMPLETED)

1. Europe Is Our Playground [Explicit] - GlassParade

Summary: Eight years and half the world away from home, a chance encounter in a Paris club leads Kurt and Sebastian - each running from the ghosts of their pasts - into the diversion of chasing each other across Europe.

2. A Shot In the Arm [Explicit] - somebetterwords

Summary: Kurt Hummel was a catch. Kurt was a catch, and Santana didn’t know what she was talking about. That’s what he’d tell himself until he believed it. But actually, talk was cheap. Kurt was going to go out and dangle himself at the gayest nightclub in the tri-county area and watch the men clamour to catch him. He wasn’t having a slutty meltdown or anything. His self esteem was not dependent on the attentions and opinions of strangers. He just needed an ego boost, one single night of his life for recalibration and encouragement from unbiased observers and also drinks. He just needed… a shot in the arm.(Though it wasn’t exactly a needle he was looking to stick in himself, and he didn’t want it going in his arm either.)

3. Live Without Shame / Call Me Anything You Want [Teen and Up Audiences] - Walden_pond313

Summary: Kurt is fed up with being heartbroken or disappointed when it comes to guys. Maybe it's time for some fun... /��Sequel to Live Without Shame. Basically, season 2 if Kurt/Blaine never happened

4. Barista Confessions [Explicit] - TheFirstMrsHummel 

Summary: Unsure of his future following graduation, Kurt finds the status quo impossible to maintain. And when Sebastian Smythe comes crashing back into his life, it gets even more complicated. PLEASE NOTE NOT KLAINE/BLAINE FRIENDLY

5. The Boys of Summer [Mature] - MoreThanTonight

Summary: A camera. A jacket pin. A phone. Lemon balm leaves. A bottle cap. A box of condoms. A bottle of sleeping pills. On the last days of summer before college, Sebastian remembers the most eventful summer of his life and the items related to it. Kurtbastian.

6. Before You Met Me [General Audiences] - ellodoctor

Summary: When Kurt goes to Dalton to spy, he meets Sebastian Smythe who then points out lead singer Blaine Anderson, his latest “goal.” After Kurt runs into him again at sectionals (and actually meeting Blaine), he suddenly finds himself to be a fast and slightly coerced friend to them both. He’s thrown right into figuring out how much Sebastian cares about Blaine, how Blaine feels about Sebastian, confessing his bullying problems and dealing with Sebastian’s ego. And it actually seems to be worth it. But will that last?

7. give your heart (a break) [Mature] - drunkonwriting 

Summary: Post-TBU AU. Life moves on after heartbreak: Kurt knows that more than most. As he tries to put his life back together after Blaine, he finds an unexpected ally in his new coworker and Isabelle's nephew: Sebastian Smythe. As Kurt goes through his new life as a single man, he finds an unexpected depth to Sebastian and realizes that losing the first love of his life doesn't mean he'll never love again.

8. (Let’s give them) Something to talk - MemeKonGlee (MemeKonYA)

Summary: “I need you to—”“I heard you the first time,” Kurt interrupts, putting his fork and knife down on his plate and pushing his half-finished pancakes aside. “What I meant was: what the hell?”He points towards the neglected pancakes, trying to stall in the face of Kurt’s reaction.“Are you sure you don’t wanna finish that first?”The look in Kurt's eyes tells him in no uncertain terms that no, he doesn't want to finish his pancakes, Jesus.And so Sebastian has no option but to take a deep breath in, exhale slowly through his mouth and just… get on with it, internally cringing at how unbelievably ridiculous it all sounds when he puts it in words, all out there for the world (and more importantly, Kurt fucking Hummel) to judge. It all boils down to: I fucked up and I'm too proud to deal with it the mature way.

9. Twitch Verse [Teen and Up Audience] - sincerelyjessy*

*A series of oneshots that explores Kurt Hummel and Sebastian Smythe’s relationship

10. Would You Hold It Against Me [Mature] - deliriumbubbles 

Summary: The Warblers discover that they and McKinley will be doing the same musical during the fall semester. After a spot of espionage against their rival school McKinley, new Warbler Sebastian finds himself fascinated by one of the young auditioners… and unintentionally becoming the Warblers’ nefarious leader.

TOP 10 KURTBASTIAN FICS (ONESHOTS)

1. The Daily Grind - orphan_account

Summary: Kurt Hummel is a bored barista, and Sebastian never gets off his phone.

2. The One with the Amusement Park [Teen and Up Audiences] - a_storm_of_frustration

Summary: “It was the only place I could think of where we could have 'fun’”, he grits his teeth.Snorting indelicately, Kurt rolls his eyes as he fixes the lapel of his sky blue pea coat. “And by 'fun’ you mean snark at each other and insult each other’s weak points until we feel like murdering the other? And whoever gets to do it first wins?”Sebastian immediately grins. And he had to bite down that grin the minute that he sees Kurt grinning at him. “Well, I did pick a public place. Full of people. Potential witnesses.”“There are rides that provide some sort of privacy. I’ll take the chance, however brief it is.”“There’s always the Tunnel of Love.”Kurt gives him a look. Sebastian bites his tongue so hard he could taste blood.--In which Sam thinks that his best friend and his boyfriend should get to know each other better and…Well, bond.

3. Weather With You [Teen Audience and Up] - chocoholicannanymous

Summary: Kurt Hummel might not exactly be the last person Wes expects to see at the club, but not far from. Who he's with, and what he's doing however... Yeah, that might the last thing he expects.This is a fic-of-a-fic, showing a scene from "A Change In the Weather" from another point of view.

4. The Truth About Sebastian Smythe [Mature] - DasWarSchonKaputt

Summary: Sebastian Smythe does what he wants. Fuck the world. Now, if only the world would quit fucking him back. AKA: Sebastian Smythe's therapy journal, ages 17 to 18.

5. Misery Loves Company [Teen and Up Audiences] - prettypurpleflower

Summary: Kurt and Sebastian keep getting ill and it messes everything up. Especially their feelings.

6. One Shots, Drabbles and Prompts (Oh My!) [General Audiences] - bastiankurts (orphan_accounts)

Summary: A collection of various pieces of written work for Kurtbastian that are either too short to upload individually or that I just felt worked better archived in this bundle. The majority of these have been shared on my own tumblr in the past and are labelled with their titles and the blurb they originally were given when first uploaded, and they include different scenarios for Kurt & Sebastian as well as a few familiar faces along for the ride!

7. Joysticks and Glitter [General Audiences] - supercanaries

Summary: Series of daddies!Kurtbastian drabbles and oneshots going through Kurt and Sebastian's path as parents and their choices that drove them towards this direction.

8. First Brick [Teen And Up Audiences] - supercanaries

Summary: It’s only when he has almost managed to suppress any thought about his boyfriend’s unusual silence that Sebastian speaks, his breath heavy and preceding a revelation Kurt has been aware of for a long while now."I’m gay."

9. Let Them Look [Not Rated] - AnarchyWretch

Summary: Sebastian observes his boyfriend in his element, surrounded by adoring NYADA boys. It's kind of an inflation to his ego, really.

10. The Textactive Stalker [Teen And Up Audiences] - Wednesday Thunder (wednesdaythunder)

Summary: Sebastian: Ever since he started getting text messages from an unknown number, it becomes evident with every new text that the other person knows exactly who he was. Yet, even the creepy stalker factor wasn't enough to stop Sebastian from forming a real connection with a friend he only knows by written words. Or does he? Kurt: Never the one to go down without a challenge, he anonymously starts texting to Sebastian Smythe, trying to find any weakness in his armour. But never was he prepared for the boy he got to know, or the feelings to grow stronger with each unopened message...

Honorable Mention (if you truly want a binge)

1. Lady Divine (fhartz91)

[jbarnes101]

Examining Youth Culture

So I had a chance to examine and study up on youth culture within several films and tv series from past to present. For those of you who aren’t familiar with the term “Youth Culture”, it typically means the way children and young adults behave, how they live, norms, values, and practices they share but it’s much more different from the older generation’s culture. Starting from the fashion trends, music, sports, slangs, and relationships from other age groups which all seem to change as time goes by. I managed to watch shows like Saved by the Bell and Euphoria and also movies such as The Breakfast Club, KIDS, Mean Girls, and Mid90s and they’re all in my opinion represent a perfect example of youth culture from past to present. Throughout watching every story, I came to realize that one of the character’s from one story felt very relatable, every story shared three common themes that still go on even in reality, and how a soundtrack could impact a tv series/film. Youth culture offers a chance for a young person to explore and express their identities of who they really are through time even from the media’s perspective on how they shape youth culture.

When we tend to watch a film or a tv series, there’s always that one or multiple characters we can all relate to in reality whether it’s through personality, behavior, or style. Out of all the characters I’ve seen and I mean ALL the characters from each story, only one was able to stick out the most that I find very relatable to me and that was Fourth Grade from the 2018 film Mid90s. You’re probably thinking out of all the characters why him? Let me explain, after watching the whole film it’s like I got to know Fourth Grade a lot more than how people would assume who he is at first glance and I felt like I connected with him even more as the film progressed. There was one scene that explained that Fourth Grade was poor and that’s the only difference I find from both of our lifestyles but there’s much more than that. Fourth Grade strikes me as a shy type of character who also keeps to himself at times when he’s talking to someone new because in one scene a girl was trying to make a conversation with him even about his film camera and the video he’s trying to create but he just wasn’t as outgoing as his friends were, he just sat there and didn’t really keep the conversation going it was more like the girl did all the talking and questioning but when he’s around his best friends, he’s more fun, wild, and caring and for me I tend to do that a lot as well like when I’m talking to someone I don’t really know, I’m going to be shy and a little quiet at first but once you get to know me or when I’m around my friends, that’s when I start to break out more and help another out. Fourth Grade is also very creative as well, almost the entire film he was shown recording him and his friends hanging out and skateboarding on his camera but towards the end of the film, he compiled all the footage he caught and made it into his own film. It was also told that Fourth Grade wanted to become a filmmaker but some of his friends didn’t believe him at first because of his stupid personality and that’s something I also connected with him because we’re both creatively bright, we both have a dream in the filmmaking work, and our friends could sometimes see us as dumb but we’re smart when we want to be. Everybody has a relatable fictional character from a tv series or a film because we’re both able to feel a deeper connection with one another just like how I felt when I saw Fourth Grade and got to know more info about him from start to finish.

After going through every series and films I’ve watched back to back, I came to realize that they all have the same common themes within one another. In my opinion each story had 3 similar themes which were coming of age, diversity, and forming friendship. For coming of age, every story featured a younger cast playing teenage roles while their characters are experiencing a change in their lives as they progress through life and half of the stories are set in a high school environment or a hang out spot where teens usually go even in reality. Like for instance, Euphoria, Mean Girls, The Breakfast Club, and Saved by the Bell featured teenage characters while also going through the stages of high school and as for Mid90s and KIDS, they also featured teenagers but they weren’t in a high school setting but they were featured at their most notable hang out spots. For diversity, this is one of the most common themes in youth culture even in reality. Each story would section a certain group of the cast in groups that they would belong in like in Saved by the Bell Zack and his friends don’t like to affiliate with the freshman in high school, in Mean Girls every group had a label for each other and they would only associate with their group peers, in The Breakfast Club one character from a different group was forced to interact with one another as they were in detention, in KIDS the guys would talk about the girls in a very sexual way while the girls talked about how the guys are disgusting, in Euphoria of course each character played one person from a different social group but more likely to interact with each other than The Breakfast Club, and in Mid90s the boys were considered troublemakers just because they’re skater boys and how they mess around a lot like doing drugs, drinking and driving, and causing a scene. For friendships, the characters from most of the stories formed an unlikely friendship. For example in Mean Girls every social group started out hating other social groups but towards the end they all came together and started being friends, in The Breakfast Club they might never wanna be seen with each other but in the end they all started to understand each other and learned that not everyone is different, in Saved by the Bell they were all friendly to one another from start to finish and they always had each others back, in KIDS the boys of course were more interactive with one another and they would even talk to some of the girls and show kindness for reasons, in Euphoria for the main cast for the girls they may look different and act different but they still understand each other and have each others back, and for Mid90s the main kid Stevie was accepted into a group of delinquents and as a reminder he’s a lot younger than the teenage boys but they didn’t care they still accepted him. Every show and every film has a common theme, even if it’s a different plot to the story they all can still relate just by how the story’s been told.

Of course when it comes to a film and a tv series, they always gotta have at least a soundtrack. The reason why I think every show and film has a soundtrack is because it adds more emotion to a scene that is played in front of an audience in order to elaborate on what’s happening in the story. I do have to say for the show Euphoria, in my opinion it could work more if ten of these songs were played in the show like Paris by The Chainsmokers, Rewind by Future Jr, 11 Minutes by YUNGBLUD, Bad Things by Cults, Nostalgic by A R I Z O N A, Fairplay by Kiana Ledè, Get You the Moon by Kina, Girls Just Wanna Have Dub by Chromatics, Guys My Age by Hey Violet, and Lie by Sasha Sloan, I definitely recommend listening to these songs and who knows maybe you’ll feel like you’re in tv series too. The reason why I feel like these songs were to fit in Euphoria a lot more is because they add more of the modern taste to the show and it kinda matches the atmosphere as the show features a lot of love and relationships, tension, and heartbreaks.

Sorry you guys had to witness me ramble on too much I guess I couldn't help it lol but hope to see you guys in the next post. Have a great day!

[icosmohunters]

chapter ten : home

chapter ten of cosmo hunters!

word count : 7.5k words

synopsis : there’s no place like home. and after quinn’s injury, hope plans to return to earth for a visit just before easter. allowing the pirate’s to see her the happy aspects of her life, hope also allows them to see the part aspect that makes her . . . uneasy.

there are few sights in the universe that are capable of inciting tears from the eyes of this starstruck bounty hunter. the suffering of others often causes the windows to the soul to leak, a picture of her family, the view of a starlit sky. these things are able to make her tear up.

but nothing can be quite the same as seeing her planet in the distance, approaching it slowly to take in the size of this minute planet holding the smartest beings to ever exist. it was strange to think that people came from here and spread out, scattering their qualities into the galaxy like pollen. or as others might say a plague.

planet earth hadn’t changed. global temperatures had been restored, there were frequent threats of war but the improvement of the space colonization process was what brought a sense of unity between everyone. every nationality had managed to fly out into space, normal human beings of all backgrounds. voyage had accomplished on maintaining a sense of peace in the world.

so, threats of war was no longer a thing. poverty had very much vanished from many countries as machines took over and global wealth skyrocketed, economies booming with the manufacture and it seemed like almost every country in the world was rich. especially now with voyage bringing in new resources from planets far away, energy to sustain human life not only on their home planet but across the solar system.

it was a prosperous time of peace on earth. and it was a good time to fly back.

the nebula had begun to ascend into the earth’s atmosphere, hope slowed her down as to notice the pale blue sky that she soon found herself flying through. puffy, white clouds and a blue sky, oh she felt like she could cry.

“ hope, i’ve sensed a sudden increase in your blood pressure. ”

a.j had spoken and hope laughed, “ it’s the excitement, a.j! i haven’t been home in ages, and there’s nothing like being home. ”

now, instead of pausing at the closest airport, hope had to travel. she had come through the pacific and now she was flying over a dense, but pristine blue sea just below her, she held back a squeal of excitement and proceeded towards what could only be described as the home she regretted leaving.

coming through the west coast of the united states, the nebula flew faster than it’s ever flown before whilst entering an atmosphere. hope saw many ships but the majority were planes which she indicated to as to avoid any accidents. and the nebula flew all the way to the south of the country to where the music was loudest and the colors the brightest.

new orleans, louisiana.

you’d think it would change from how it used to be but it was untouched. the stacked buildings and bars and nightlife were as feverous and as vibrant as always, the fever for music still burning and the people still coming and going with tales of a beautiful city with a charming background in every sense.

the nearest parking space for ships was not too far away from the french quarter, which was where the house that hope had grown up was stationed. the field was wide and many ships had already landed, and thank goodness there was one space available for nebula to lay at rest for at least a couple of days.

as soon as nebula touched down, hope removed her seatbelts and excitedly went down the elevator. to be fair, it was hard going around the ship without having a slight skip in her step, especially with how eager she was.

“ you’re looking excited ”, enzo pointed out when hope entered the lounge. and that’s when the realization settled in. “ h-holy crap, we’re back home. ”

hope was bursting with energy, she inhaled deeply as to keep herself composed. “ we’re in new orleans, my hometown. i know you might not want to leave quinn alone but i have an idea ”, she inquired and then paused. “ i just have to go ahead first. ”

“ new orleans? ”, the captain gasped and threw his arms up high in the air. “ oh, i’m going to love easter for the first time. go on, but hurry up! i wanna go out and explore the city of jazz. ”

hope didn’t need to be told twice. before she could even think about leaving the nebula, however, she got changed into something more . . . homelike. it was odd putting clothes that weren’t going to serve in hunting a criminal down, or clothes that belonged to the company she informally worked for.

it was about time hope threw on some normal clothes, though. so she slipped on a pink shirt beneath some denim dungarees and some converse shoes, deciding to let her hair be. no luggage was required for her to bring back since her room remained untouched when she was gone, and her mother washed her clothes even though she never uses them.

now hope was rushing, out of her room and out of the nebula. touching down on the earthly ground for the first time in nearly a year.

even being able to breathe without a mask or a helmet was a relief. the sun was hot as ever, but she could withstand it. grinning to herself, she moved out of the spaceship parking spaces and after paying her parking fee, despite being a citizen, hope then carried onto the streets she missed to dearly.

even from far away, before stepping out into a clear opening, she could hear the melodious clarinets and the shrieking of trumpets and some flirtatious hums from saxophones and the tip-taps of the hit-hats on a drum set. the smell of gumbos being made and served, the tropical heat and the sight of palm trees, oh it felt wonderful to be home.

her senses were all alive, but her ears were particularly blessed with the music native to this wonderful town, this diverse and creative town. in the years that it has remained alive, it saw many periods of discrimination but it persevered, this town down the south of the u.s survived.

seeing all the people made a difference, though. hope saw the various bars that had remained open, families and friends spilling out into the streets for a quick meal down by the native restaurant to have their taste buds satisfied by african-american delicacies. sighing softly, hope could have stood there for a long time, watching them.

but she carried on moving towards bienvelle street, where she saw a potent creole townhouse painted in turquoise with white details on the balcony bars in front of the long windows. that was her home, the home she grew up in and was never unhappy with.

“ hope! ”, cried an elderly voice not too far ahead of her. it was hortense, her very kind next-door neighbor. she had remained stunning despite the age that was catching up to her, her melanin still rich and her dark eyes as docile as ever. she carried a heavy louisiana accent that always made hope smile when she heard it, and she smelt like cinnamon with a mixture of coconuts, a lovely and nostalgic combination. “ is that you, hun? ”.

the girl grinned from ear to ear and opened her arms wide to greet the woman, cooing softly whilst embracing her smaller body. “ i’m home now! ”, she announced happily and after letting the hug linger, she cupped the woman’s cheeks softly. “ looking stunning, as per usual. ”

“ oh i didn’t think you’d notice ”, the woman laughed, her chortle throaty and welcoming. “ i’ve just been exfoliating. ”

hope rose her eyebrows and couldn’t help but wiggle them, “ trying to impress the man at home, huh? ”. and then laughed at the small smack on the shoulder she received. “ how is he? is he better? still working? ”.

“ still working ”, hortense replied with a nod. “ although, he has been at home very often to spend time with me. i don’t know if i’ll ever get used to it properly. when you get married, you’ll know. ”

hope tilted her head and smiled adoringly at the lady, she has always spoken so well of her marriage of nearly fifty years with her husband. in this modern world, romance wasn’t exactly too popular. people had recognized love as a chemical reaction rather than a spiritual bond, and yet, older generations managed to remain romantic. it was hope’s who was a little cold to the topic.

but she never excused the idea of marriage. her parents married at a very young age and their relationship was intact, perhaps maybe more now than before. it would be nice to find someone but hope didn’t think it would be anytime soon, she was only twenty-two and she hadn’t explored all she wanted to see just yet.

“ i’m sure i will ”, hope said softly before looking back at her house. “ okay, i’m going to pop in very quickly to see the family. i’ll be back soon before tea, i promise! i bought some . . . colleagues over! ”.

hortense gasped, and then smirked with a laugh. “ my girl’s already growing up, since when are you the type to bring colleagues, huh? i mean it, you never bring friends over unless if you want them to impress your parents. there has to be a boy involved. ”

laughing, hope waved to the lady and watched her head back into her home, her door was open and she could hear some classic jazz playing through the sound of what sounded like the woman scolding her husband. chuckling, hope then went into her own house.

you’d think new orleans would be impacted by the technology but people only evolved their way of living if it was necessary. hope’s family had to because her father was a bit of a lunatic when it came to science, but it had remained relatively twenty-first century based, in that they hadn’t changed many things.

unlocking the front door, she heard music from inside almost immediately. it was most likely her mother, who was fond of nearly every genre of music around the world except for country, she couldn’t stand it. today, she had seemed to stick to some art farmer, a beloved trumpeter that even hope held dear to her heart.

the house was separated in two floors; the bottom floor being the garage, the first floor being the kitchen and living room and workspaces, and the top floor being the bedrooms and at the very top, hope’s father set up his astronomy roof, as he liked to call it.

going up the stairs to the first floor, the music grew louder and upon reaching the top, hope spotted some movement from the living room, and then the movement came into view, her darling mother dancing, swaying, whistling and humming. youthful and fun as always, stunning as if age did not impact her beauty at all.

she looked almost identical to her daughter except for the hair which she’d dyed into a reddish-brown of some sort. regardless, it suited her. out of all the people hope knew in the world, her mother was the definition of effervescent.

effervescent and at times aloof. the woman was enjoying her music so much that it took her a hot minute to notice her daughter all the way down the hall. the woman gasped and froze, her hands covering her open mouth and her eyes wide, even from here, hope could see them tear up.

“ hi, mom. ”

“ oh, hope, you’re home ”, she sighed and rushed to give the girl a hug, a tight one that nearly crushed hope and her innocent bones but the girl just grinned and tucked her chin on the woman’s shoulder, letting the hug linger. “ oh, goodness, you should have told me, i would have dressed up better or done something about my hair— ”.

hope laughed and tightened the hug, “ you look stunning, mom. you don’t have to dress up for me, i wanted to surprise you guys. ” the girl lifted her head slightly from her shoulder and smiled at her properly. “ oh, look at you. ”

her mother grinned and kissed her cheek tenderly, then taking a step back and holding her index finger to her lips. “ your brother’s in his room, i think he’ll be happy to see you ”, she informed the girl.

“ where’s dad? ”.

“ went shopping, now go! ”.

hope’s heart stammered in her chest with excitement. her baby brother was someone she was dying to see, perhaps the one she most wanted to see. taking the flight of stairs up to the bedrooms, she stepped onto the birch plank floors and tried not to make her steps echo even though her mother was playing music downstairs.

connor’s room was the door across from hers, so when he was a baby who managed to walk, he would often burst into her room in the morning to wake her up. after that, it was mostly her who woke him up. it was noon, though, so he couldn’t possibly be still in bed.

hearing music from within his own room, hope pressed her hand to the doorknob and turned it slowly, before peeking her head in. the place hadn’t changed a bit, his bedsheets were the same and his action figurines were still stacked up on his shelves, along with scientific books and comics.

her mother was like her in that he loved some scientific stuff. the first time introduced him to doctor who, he binged watched two seasons within the span of a couple of nights during his school holidays. and when he got into marvel, she couldn’t stop him from buying almost anything iron man related. the boy loved iron man.

the kid was sat at his desk, but there was no chair sight. hope frowned slightly but tried to smile all the same. his wheelchair had changed, perhaps they had gotten him a new model that made it faster and easier for a kid his age to move. either way, it saddened her.

not because of the wheelchair, but because he was on a wheelchair.

resting against his doorframe, hope watched her ten-year-old brother for a moment. he hadn’t changed at all, his hair remained dark and his shirts were always colorful, he mostly wore summer-clothes as to avoid getting too hot. he couldn’t really swim anymore, so clothes like these kept him cool.

they seemed to have gotten rid of his glasses, though, and that’s when she recalled the message her father had sent her that connor’s eye surgery had worked out and his vision was perfect.

he hadn’t seemed to have taken notice of her until he turned on his wheelchair with something in hand. a letter, an envelope. her eyes widened for a moment when she realized it was lilac. every time he used a lilac envelope, it was meant to be for her. whatever the message was, it was always meant for her.

connor’s eyes went from his desk and towards his sister who was at the door still, completely frozen still. hope saw his legs, saw that he was no longer paralyzed from the ankles down, but now it seemed to have affected just below his knees. and the tears soon rose to her eyes once again.

“ h-hope . . . ”.

“ h-hi, kid. ”

inhaling through the pain in her chest, she rushed over and picked him up, sweeping him off the wheelchair and holding him like he was still a baby. in her eyes, he hadn’t aged at all. he was ten years old and with an illness that could potentially kill him soon if no one did anything.

she felt those fragile arms around her neck and his tearful face against her neck which muffled the sound of his sobs. the last time she saw her brother crying was roughly five years ago, when he was diagnosed with muscular dystrophy, which affected the course of his life, and it still does.

hope stood there, holding the crying boy in her arms and securing his legs around her waist. he wasn’t heavy at all, she could carry him around like this for hours. and she wanted to. to make up for the lack of presence she showed in his life, a life that was partially miserable. she saw him express his sadness to his mother one night, about being teased school, about being unable to be a normal boy.

sighing softly, she ran a hand through his jet black hair and kissed his cheek softly. “ hey, it’s okay, you don’t have to hide your face from me, kiddo ”, she told him, caressing his cheek gently to get a glance at his gentle features.

when he rose his head, hope smiled tenderly. his full cheeks seemed to have gone, and his eyes seemed sadder, there wasn’t that glitter of innocence in them anymore. his illness completely took that away from him. but she always believed that even when you’re sick, you deserve a normal life. but people around you are always going to make it difficult.

hope’s father became severely depressed after the news, it was only her and her mother who managed to fight through it and try to make connor’s life as normal as possible. he knew of his illness and she wondered what the pain was of having to go through a day knowing that this might kill you one day.

it was why hope had gone to join voyage. the pay was good, and her father also spoke well of it. so perhaps with enough funds, they could afford the surgery. now they didn���t have the funds to either cure the boy’s illness nor give her father an artificial arm.

but she fought through it, she wanted to heal them both.

“ how are you, hm? did you pick up piano like mom said you would? ”, she questioned. the jazz was pleasant, so she pretended to dance with him, only to invoke a little giggle that brought a wave of serotonin to hope’s mind. “ our very own chopin. ”

connor grinned, “ i started two months ago. i like it a lot. dad was going to teach me to play guitar but that was . . . before the accident. ” he appeared saddened for a moment until he pressed his cheek against his sister’s. “ but that’s okay! i prefer piano anyway. ”

“ piano’s classier, you’ll have fun learning it. you better invite me to your school concert, i’ll fight to be there ”, hope said and connor nodded eagerly. smiling softly, she heard the music on the boy’s speaker change. she recognized it to be some rolling stones. she gasped. “ you little sneak, you took the album from my room! ”.

“ i also took some plushies! ”.

“ hm, fair enough. ”

hope sighed softly and put the boy back down onto his wheelchair, making sure he was secured before smiling. “ right, well, uh what happened to the old wheelchair you had? did mom throw it away? ”, she asked.

connor shook his head, “ it’s in the garage, dad fixed it but we like this one. in case it breaks, though, we can always go back to the old one. ” hope nodded slowly and looked off into the distance. “ why? ”.

“ i’m gonna need it. ”

time skip  ﹏

“ oh, you’re back! ”.

indeed she was. she didn’t exactly ask permission from her parents, but she took the old wheelchair her brother used to the ship. there was a small control stick on the left armrest to make it easier for the patient to move. and the reason she’d bought it was because there was someone who needed it. quinn. and she didn’t want the kid tucked inside the ship for the two days they would be there.

she had brought the chair into the ship and had taken it into the bedroom, quinn seemed to have woken up and he looked much better than yesterday. what he needed was not to be tucked inside a bedroom when there was sunlight and food and people outside.

“ w-what’s that for? ”, the boy asked, visibly alarmed when the chair came into view. “ is that for me? ”.

hope managed a meek smile and brought the chair closer to him. “ you’re injured, still. but you can sit up, you can sit and eat and this chair is the best thing you’re going to get if you’re coming outside. it’s warm, and there’s food and music, you’re not staying cooped up here ”, she said and turned to vivienne. “ you can help him get into cooler clothes? ”.

vivienne smiled, “ of course! but uh, may i ask, how did you find it? ”.

hope paused and inhaled deeply. “ it’s my brother’s old chair ”, she said. after making a swift leave from the bedroom, she waited outside patiently for everything to be done and the doors slid open in around six or seven minutes, quinn had handled the controls of the wheelchair quite easily. hope chuckled as he moved himself out into the hall and gave a little spin in the chair. “ how does it feel? ”.

“ better than being in bed ”, he stated and then offered her a hint of a smile, she wondered just what it looked like in its full form. “ thank you for this, i’ll find a way to pay you back somehow. ”

hope shook her head, “ just enjoy yourself whilst you’re here. that’s all i ask from you. ”

it took some time but soon the pirates had gotten themselves dressed into some proper attire. hope had to lend dawn some hair clips from her closet as it would be a nice detail to the summer dress she had picked. not to mention the adorable flats on her feet. if she wore anything cuter, she would reduce her age to at least a teenager’s appearance.

the streets were more likely nearly the afternoon, most neighbors would be up and would bring meals to each other’s homes, having a lovely lunch together. the bars were all open, the children were spilling onto the streets with skipping ropes and footballs. you’d think that children’s upbringing would be different, but parents kept traditions alive so they could be young for a little longer.

“ so, this is where you grew up ”, enzo mumbled to her, he was walking alongside her, taking in the sights as if he was walking through a museum. “ it’s so colorful, and that music’s amazing! i wanna move here when i retire. ”

hope looked about for a little longer. the french quarter was a lovely place to live, and the food was better here than anywhere else in town. “ yeah, it’s a wonderful place. the best place for bringing up artistic people. my brother’s taste in music is already superior since he grew up here as opposed to a kid in california ”, the girl voiced with a small smirk.

enzo snorted, “ that’s something to be proud of. ”

needless to say, it was pleasant taking a walk around the french quarter. hope would have shown them more but lunchtime was coming around and she didn’t want them to be too hungry. so she stopped by her favorite restaurant, brennan’s. they served perhaps the best food in the entire city.

upon requesting a table, hope waited in line and took a quick look around. the walls were still painted green and the floor still checker-patterned. and the food smelled magnificent, as it always did.

they managed to get a big table by the window and hope helped quinn settle into a secure space before taking her seat in between vivienne and enzo, dominic and dawn sitting beside each other. hope’s never taken notice of it but they seemed to be close. even peeking at them at times, she sensed an amorous feeling from them, proximity. like her proximity to connor.

it was . . . cute.

when the time came to order, hope ordered a plate of gumbo with prawns and rice, and for the first time in a while, she settled with some water to drink on the side. whilst everyone else ordered and waited for the food, vivienne sprouted some conversation to fill the silence in.

“ so . . . you don’t have to answer this if you don’t want to ”, the girl began and hope turned her attention to her. “ you spoke of your brother yesterday, but not the fact that he . . . has a disability. ”

hope hummed and looked down, “ i don’t see why it’s relevant. my brother’s been sick with muscular dystrophy since he was four. first, it started with his feet and over time it rose up to his legs. it’s just below his knee now. it just means he can’t walk, hence why he’s in a wheelchair. hence why i was able to get that one for quinn until he gets better. ” she motioned to where quinn sat with a slight smile.

“ c-can he not get treatment? ”, dawn raised, appearing concerned when there really wasn’t any reason to be. connor had been sick for a while and the alarm that hope used to feel had been blocked from her senses, she can’t spend some years of her life just waiting for her brother to do. she prefers to do something about it first.

“ he’s been getting treatment. but ever since my dad’s accident, no one’s been working and there’s not enough to pay for it. it’s . . . kind of the reason why i joined voyage. to raise funds. i don’t want connor to go at such a young age, it’s best to treat it before the loss of muscle power reaches vital organs ”, she stated and shook her head. “ there’s nothing i wouldn’t for him. ”

enzo’s hand met the girl’s back, feeling a gently pat on it. “ that’s admirable, hope. really admirable. and i think that with your hard work, within given time, both your father and your brother will be healing ”, he said and hope returned the smile he offered, it was good to be encouraged at times.

because sometimes she felt like she was fighting this battle all alone and that people thought it was meaningless, that everyone had lost faith in her. but to be smiled at and encouraged really brought some warmth to her.

she appreciated it. wholeheartedly.

when the food came, it was compliments all around to the chef, and the bounty hunter couldn’t blame them. they appeared famished to an extent, but the quality of the food really made a difference. vivienne even offered to ask the chef for the recipe in case she wanted to serve this meal on the go.

the dish really brought that sense of nostalgia in a ripple effect, her senses tingling once more with the richness of the food that incited memories of her childhood; going out to the bayou for a boat ride, playing hopscotch in the veranda, riding her bike around the neighborhood. it almost drew tears to her eyes.

she noticed she had tuned out and tuned back in whilst the pirates were talking amongst themselves. hope has never really sat to watch and notice them individually, and the way they spoke to each other, conversations jumping and attention shifting and bursts of laughter and groans of dread at bad jokes, it was like sitting in a family dinner.

hope remained quiet as she didn’t want to disturb them, just because she was there didn’t mean that they couldn’t have their bonding moments. besides, when was the last time they got to be out in the open like this? she stood up, excusing herself to go pay for the meals.

it wasn’t expensive and the waitress gave her a discount as she’d known hope for years. it’s magical, being a frequent customer. as she was tapping her card on the reader, hope’s gaze wandered to the door when it opened, and her food, which had settled so well, began to brew into a cyclone of dread within her.

it was like the sweetness and saltiness had become pure sourness and the food was beginning to rise, the water she’d drank couldn’t calm down the raging way her blood was running. it was fear, it was dread, it was a cluster of emotions that left her speechless and immobile for a moment.

when those bleak, black eyes met hers, she really felt like she was going to faint and she would have turned away and walked back to the table but it was too late now, he’d seen her, and his eyes looked like they would pop from their sockets.

“ hope, is that you? ”.

“ h-hi, malakai. ”

the said male scoffed and approached and pulled her into a tight hug that she felt like she was going to burn from. it was like her heart was about to shoot out from her throat, she was so nervous. and not the good kind of nervous, the worst kind of nervous.

he pulled back quickly and took a good look at her. he way taller than her, it felt like she was being stared down at like some sort of animal, an ant, one that could easily be stepped on by the intimidated aura of this particular young man.

malakai worked for voyage. he had joined at the same time as hope and they trained in the same squad for a while until he got moved to communications where he worked as a messanger in between colonies, carrying important messages from leader to leader.

aside from being relatively smart, malakai also harnessed the looks that brought quite the attention. those luminous ebony eyes, the tanned skin and dark hair, the pretty nose and soft details, he was quite frankly the epitome of perfection in terms of visuals, he never failed to leave hope stunned at times but his beauty at times . . . startled her.

“ it’s been a long time, wow! ”, he commented. it has been a while, it’s nearly been four, going onto five years since she’s seen him. “ you’ve changed. still short, though. ”

hope laughed slightly, “ don’t get rude now. i didn’t think you’d come to celebrate easter, i thought perhaps you’d be with your folks in portugal. ”

malakai quickly shook his head, “ nah, portugal gets boring. lisbon never changes so sometimes i stay in new orleans for special events. besides, i have family friends here so i’m not exactly alone. ” hope nodded and looked down at her hands. “ are you here alone? ”.

quickly shaking her head, hope nodded towards the table in the corner. and for a second, she saw enzo rise up in his seat slightly. like he was observing, or perhaps about to smash someone’s face in, she couldn’t tell the difference. “ lunch with some . . . uh, friends. they’re staying with us for easter so you’ll meet them eventually ”, she uttered softly.

looking back at malakai, his gaze remained on the pirates and hope couldn’t describe at his expression was. because he had just been smiling and now it looked like . . . nothing. plain, a colorful canvas splashed with white, monotone and blank.

but then it changed into a soft gaze as he looked back at her, “ i hope so. ” rolling her eyes yet again, hope chose to keep her gaze on the ground. he suddenly tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and then finally took a step back. “ anyways, i’m just here to pick up a delivery. i’ll see you around, then. ”

“ o-of course ”.

malakai nodded and upon collecting his food, blew the bounty hunter a kiss and then left. just like that. hope walked back slowly to the table, trying to recover from the revolting feeling she sensed when he had entered. it always happened, like a reflex action.

“ who was that? ”, quinn questioned. “ friend? ”.

“ boyfriend? ”, dom inquired. enzo’s eye seemed to twitch.

hope quickly shook her head, “ n-no, he’s a friend. we grew up not too far from each other, went to high-school together. he was my prom date but then we were always friends. he’s also in voyage. ”

vivienne’s eyes lit up, “ you looked close, he was standing quite close to you. look at you, you’re a bit red. ” eyes widening, hope covered her cheeks with her hands. “ i think he likes you. ”

hope smiles shyly and took her seat once again. the chatter sprung up again and she zoned out because she was startled after seeing malakai after so many years. he was always nice to her, especially back in high-school, and he was a rather lovely prom date considering no one else had asked her to go. vivienne wasn’t the first person who proposed the idea of him fancying her, she’s heard it before.

but she doesn’t really see it. he is just an amorous person by nature, affectionate, and fond of physical contact, nothing more. he’s never really made a move on her, never spoke about romance near her. so she believed it was the trick of the eye when others said he liked her. people simply taking his kindness as something else.

after the long meal, hope decided that the pirates could stay at her place. they could very much stay in the ship but that wasn’t exactly polite, especially since her mother was welcoming of people hope introduced. which was rare, hence why she persisted in letting them stay.

there was plenty of room around the house, mostly because there was a spare bedroom for guests. usually, hope’s grandmother would stay there, but the woman had formally moved to new york and she hasn’t visited in a while. there was a double bed for at least two or three people, some sleeping bags in the attic, and room on the couch. if connor wanted to sleep on hope’s bed, there would be space in his room as well.

it was an odd feeling, allowing people she previously had a distaste towards in her house. but it was better than letting them stay on the ship. for some reason, she wanted to show them what she was . . . actually like. they probably took her for an arrogant, cold and lonely girl. but she had a family, a family she loved very much and one that might be welcoming to them.

when hope introduced them, it was like connor bonded with them immediately. to her family, they were still voyage members. yet they seemed to have given up on the fake names. before they could, though, hope ran a search through many pirate databases on voyage in search of their names.

and there weren’t any names, nor many obvious pictures, only descriptions on their appearances. they still had bounties but it was unlikely her father was in the right frame of mind to be hunting or arresting anyone.

when they came in, she heard he was on the roof, getting ready for another night of star-gazing as he wanted to see some new constellations moving in. it was always his dream to adventure out of the solar system to somewhere new, he was an ambitious man.

hope walked onto the roof with her hands behind her back and saw her old man there already. he had a work station on the roof, a little seat for him to relax on and his equipment which was somewhat scattered around. usually, when it rained, he would pull up a field to shield it. he’d paid quite a lot for it.

it is a strange feeling, seeing your father who changed whilst you were away. his right arm was nearly completely gone, only some bits of his forearm remained which he seemingly hid behind a leather jacket. he remained handsome despite it all, he’d lost weight and he was growing a neat beard that suited him well. there wasn’t a single strand of white hair on his head, he always took care of his appearance.

but there was something on the man that puzzled the girl, and it was the lack of that party-animal personality he had. he should’ve been dancing around, playing music, singing whilst working, perhaps calling for his wife to come up to see something.

that was gone. he was silent as he adjusted his telescope. his most prized possession, his only look into the stars now that flying was out of bounds to him. the tears came flying to her eyes again, hope stared so helplessly at the man she admired so much and how he was coping. if he was coping at all.

he had his back to her, but he turned when laughter was heard from downstairs. and then his eyes settled on his daughter. similar to connor, he seemed to freeze and then begin to tear up, hope rushed to him before he could call her name.

and threw her arms around him tightly, securing them around his neck and hiding her face within the crook of his neck, feeling his only remaining arm wrap itself around her. he still wore the leather jacket her and connor got him for his birthday, he still wore the same perfume his mother gave him on their anniversary, he was still the same man in body but perhaps not the same in his mind.

not a single word was spoken for a good minute as she tightened the hug, letting her eyes close for a brief moment to appreciate the peace that being home brought her. it was a relief seeing her father well. she thought he would have changed completely, shut her out for having taken too long or refused her embrace. but he didn’t.

then, he spoke. “ i thought i wouldn’t be seeing you until connor’s birthday ”, he mumbled softly, his voice also hadn’t changed. at all. oh, god one cannot explain how happy that made her.

“ i wanted to be here sooner. i’m sorry i took too long ”, she uttered with a frown, not looking to pull away any time soon. “ i missed you, dad. ”

her father chuckled and then hummed. “ i missed you more, hope. i can’t even express how worried i was. about you and how you were handling yourself out there . . . ”, was what he continued with. “ but you’re brave, you always pull through in the end. and you always come home. ”

her eyes opened and her expression remained empty for a moment until one pristine tear fell from her eye and spilled down the bridge of her nose, running all the way down the tip before it fell onto the ground. a single tear. she’s never given herself the freedom to cry over anyone or anything, crying was always a waste of time and energy.

but this time, she couldn’t help it. this was her father. she knew many people out there didn’t have one as amazing as this one, or a father at all. she knew many didn’t have mothers, brothers. she knew she was incredibly fortunate to having something like a family to go back to when she had to retreat from the world.

she had a home. and she never took that for granted.

her father gave her another gentle squeeze before moving back slightly and taking a good look at her face, wiping the remaining tears away and patting her cheek softly. “ don’t cry because of me, hope. you don’t want me to tell you the magical tear story again, do you? ”, he laughed at the face she pulled and then let her sniffle and wipe her face. “ did you bring friends over? ”.

“ y-yeah ”, she breathed through her sniffle, and then settled with her hands in the pockets of her dungarees. “ comrades. workmates. they’re newbies so they don’t know much about what happens. they don’t have a place to stay for easter. ”

he smiled, “ that’s fine, we can open some space for them. and i wonder if they prefer hotdogs or hamburgers for the barbeque tomorrow . . . are any of them vegetarian? ”.

“ lucas everhart, you are truly a complex man ”, hope commented, seeing how his eyes softened with a sense of innocence. “ i’m glad you’re here, dad. ” he moved in and pressed a tender kiss to her forehead.

“ i am rather complex. now go, make your friends feel comfortable ”, he told her and ushered her away, she stood there for a moment, watching him go about his work. she wanted to speak more time with him, but she still had the whole of easter to enjoy his company.

heading down the stairs, she found connor in the living room with dawn and quinn, he seemed to be quizzing them about planets and whatnot and hope didn’t mind it so long as they avoided making it obvious that they weren’t a part of voyage.

in the kitchen, it seemed like vivienne and hope’s mother had started to get along. showing off recipes was always one of her mother’s favorite things to do, especially when feeding a large group of people.

she didn’t see enzo nor dom, however. she looked about but didn’t catch sight of them. “ they went out to the store, hope, they’ll be back soon ”, vivienne told her. the girl nodded and then went into the living room.

“ hey tyke, come here, give your sister some cuddles ”, hope said to the baby brother who immediately rose his arms to be picked up. when taking him into her arms, she was always gentle. looking at his face, they shared a sweet smile before she sat down on the couch, giving him space on her lap to relax. “ what are you guys talking about? ”.

dawn grinned, “ space-dust. he’s really smart, you know, he was telling me about the new goldilock planet they found in the milky way. ”

connor looked at hope and smiled eagerly. “ it’s really cool, but it’s too hard to explain it and i’m tired ”, he mumbled before resting his head against her chest. “ cuddles. ”

“ cuddles ”, hope repeated and looked down towards his small figure and the way his eyes closed, he did look rather tired and he smelt a bit like chlorine. “ did you go swimming? ”. connor hummed and nodded. “ see, i’m going to start crying if you keep things to yourself. tell me what you’re doing, connor, i wanna spend time with you. ”

he rose his head slightly and looked at her thought sleepy eyes, “ m’kay, i’m, uh . . . yawn, doing some swimming . . . a-and piano . . . an— ”.

“ okay, no, nevermind, shh, sleep ”, hope cut in and put his head back against her chest, smiling at the giggles that came from both him and dawn.

it was peaceful, the rest of the evening was composed primarily of introducing her family to the pirates. connor was fast asleep on her lap, worn out from the swimming and the excitement of today, he looked like he was going to burn with energy tomorrow so hope let him sleep.

her father wasn’t as curious about the pirates as she thought he’d be, and perhaps it may be because the topic of voyage may upset him. so they mostly talked about sports, music, art, things that anyone can join into. hope never stopped holding the sleeping connor in her arms, though, he looked too peaceful and too safe there.

the feeling of being home cannot be compared to anything else. being out in space is one thing but it’ll never replace the sensation of being in the walls you grew up in and being among the people you hold dearest to your heart. she made the most of it now, because things might change in a couple of years’ time.

in the midst of the silence, she rested her cheek gently against her brother’s head and closed her eyes. blocking out the sounds around her and only focusing on now, not tomorrow or the day after that, not yesterday or the week she had. now.

now, she was home. safe and sound.

[bipercabeth]

i love love loved your breakdown of Lover & i agree with so many aspects of it!! my favs are lover, paper rings, and cruel summer. the album makes me go absolutely feral at some of the lyrics and it’s so lovey dovey my heart can’t handle!! i was wondering what other artists or albums you really like???

oh man you have no idea what you signed up for with this question. i am taking this ask as an excuse to go fully music nerd up in here and i am doing so with no regrets. i’m gonna start with artists because there are a lot that i love that i can’t just pick one album or even a favorite. 

frank turner - i literally have a tattoo of his be more kind album art on my arm. he’s got an insanely diverse discography while still staying true to his punk rock roots and i think his evolution as an artist is so admirable. i’ve gone to a songwriting workshop he ran and it was the most eye opening experience. in may i went to his music festival in boston (lost evenings, look it up! he headlines every night, puts together a setlist of his favorite musicians, etc. it’s amazing) and it literally changed my life. every song of his has a point, and every single word drives that point home. his albums aren’t necessarily concept albums, but they’re all thematic and the songs drive home the point of the album as well. when i look at my playlist of favorite songs, his name pops up the most. 

bleachers - we knew this was coming. if u have looked at a single one of my posts about music, they always come back to bleachers, specifically dream of mickey mantle. jack antonoff is an incredible songwriter, performer, and producer. i can listen to a track and tell you if he worked on it. i am so ride or die for this man. bleachers has a unique style that i really can’t put my finger on with the exception of their heavy use of synths. seeing their set at riotfest was one of the highlights of whole ass life. their lyrics are sneakily profound, they don’t always hit you upon first listen. jack antonoff has absolutely mastered the art of simple songwriting and how to make the simplest lyrics absolute gut punches. 

okay i’m putting the rest under the cut bc i have a lot to say

julien baker - when people ask me to describe my music taste, i usually opt for saying “sad ladies with guitars” and that’s largely due to julien baker’s impact. she is unafraid in her exploration of her own suffering mental health, and it’s absolutely devastating, but it’s also so comforting. it’s the type of sad that tells you you’re not alone in your struggles, and i think that’s where her power is. it’s expression of her struggles without romanticizing them, and i think that’s incredibly important.

will varley - i got into him when he opened for the first frank turner show i went to and absolutely fell in love. best songwriter i have ever heard hands down. i need to give a few examples of my favorites because i do not have the words to describe his talent and do it justice. “Birth, death, weddings and wars / That's all we are good for / If all of the past was played as a song / Our lives are a beat of the drum” “Well playgrounds look like prisons the day after you leave school / And exes look like angels the day before they fall” “He got so many chains wrapped round his eyes that he cannot see / And he'd rather be blind than to realize he's never been free”. I could go on and on just quoting my favorite lines of his, but he’s so incredibly talented. it’s just him and his guitar onstage, but his albums have more production and instruments. very folk/bluegrass in sound. i would die for him. 

albums: 

punch // autoheart - this is such an emotionally diverse album, i always know i can find something to match my mood both tonally and lyrically. there are slow, melancholy songs like january and santa fe, bops like anniversary and moscow, hauntingly beautiful and profound songs like agoraphobia, and absolute gut punches like sailor song. i listen to autoheart’s other work, but this album is such a distinct work of art that i find myself gravitating towards it regardless. it’s one of the few albums among my favorites that isn’t a concept and doesn’t have a narrative, but i think that speaks to its strengths. 

sister cities // the wonder years - this is the one punk album that everyone i’ve introduced to it has liked regardless of their musical preferences. the lead singer’s vocals are absolutely INSANE (and just as good live) and his capacity for emotion is unparalleled. this album deals with a lot of guilt and baggage over the death of a loved one, and it encompasses every aspect of that on at least one song. it tells a clear story and every line works toward driving home the narrative, but never at the expense of honesty. this is a painfully honest album due to how specific it is, and how that specificity gives it universality. the wonder years also have mastered the artistic use of the word fuck, which i admire. there’s nothing wrong with just throwing fuck in a song for the fuck of it, but they write in a way that the word fuck is necessary to convey the emotion they’re trying to get across. “i drew a line in the sand with these worthless fucking hands,” “It's been over a year now / April turns into May / I barely stopped moving / I've been so fucking afraid,” etc. also i could write a whole essay on the ocean grew hands to hold me, but maybe another day. my favorite song on the album. perfect closer. they close their concerts with it and it’s PERFECT. also dan campbell (lead singer) said this is the song they’ve been trying to write since they started writing music and i cannot express how soft that makes me. 

routine maintenance // aaron west & the roaring twenties - the good thing is i don’t have to stop talking about dan campbell! aw&trt is his solo project, two concept albums about a man (aaron) who essentially has the worst two years of his life. the first one (we don’t have each other) covers him losing his dad, his wife miscarrying, and then leaving him. heavy shit. but THIS album is about him getting back on his feet, finding music, and eventually making his way back to his family. i have a soft spot for music about healing, and this hits that spot right on the mark. 

after the party // the menzingers - more punk! the menzingers are an incredible band, but i love after the party the most because of the narrative (can u tell i like albums that tell a story?). it’s about aging, nostalgia, and self-improvement, and all are really well done, especially in the song lookers. also mastered the artistic use of fuck (”i will fuck this up, i fucking know it”)

sing to me instead // ben platt - i already made a whole post about this

lover // taylor swift - listen i know i just did a breakdown of this too but it’s my favorite ts album okay

stranger in the alps // phoebe bridgers - similar to julien baker in how achingly sad some of the songs are, but phoebe’s music is just a little inexplicably softer. she explores topics other than mental health too, like toxic relationships, normal breakups, and a few abstract songs from another perspective. the album itself is less of a narrative, but there are common themes throughout it! 

[mechanicalwitch]

Pop Culture Magic, An Introductory

(This essay was written as a lecture for the discord server, Witching Willow, as an introductory to the topic of pop culture magic.)

Let’s start this off with a simple question. What is pop culture? The simplest answer is provided by the site dictionary.com states that pop culture, standing for popular culture, is “cultural activities or commercial products reflecting, suited to, or aimed at the tastes of the general masses of people”. However, John Storey argues in Cultural Theory and Popular Culture: An Introduction that popular culture is something that can be defined in a variety of conflicting ways by different people across different contexts.

There’s a certain amount of energy invested each waking moment by almost everyone in our world – occultist, practitioner, mage, witch, or not – in pop culture. The media presents itself in ways to everyone with the resources to consume it, usually with a purpose in financial, political, or attention gain. There’s a practice that many occultists turn their noses up at, however, in making use of that energy we all put into the popular culture around us for self-betterment, gain, and other such magical purposes and practices.

Ironically, there’s a sense of counter-culture to it. Pop culture is presented for many purposes, from making money to – for the conspiracy theorists both mild and wild – government control over the people. Pop culture icons in celebrities, fiction, and media come and go, and change often. It dominates our world in a lot of ways, and therefore can be considered a force of its own worth picking by the watchful eye of a magician.

There’s many ways to use pop culture in your magic. Some use it subtly in ways of music-based rituals or more modern images driving a meditation. Others model spells and rituals after what they hear in their favourite songs or see on tv. And some go so far as to create and/or call on entities who originate from pop culture and media, seeking their magic, learning from them, and at times even worshiping them as Gods on par with those of ancient mythology. Some practitioners hold a philosophy that as pop culture changes and leads cultures with it, the investment borders on religious itself. Some may look to Michael Jackson with the adoration and love ancient Greeks held for their Gods.

For the purpose of today, we will hold a fair bit of focus on the fictional side of it, which can be more or less of fiction depending on who you speak to. Pop culture magic resembles more of a genre of beliefs and magical practices rather than one concise system. In this sense, practitioners will have many varying philosophies, beliefs, and methodologies behind their practices. These can all be as diverse as the individualism within each and every practitioner, just as many have different approaches to magic and the occult in general. Different practitioners will have different ways to utilize pop culture, and different reasons for doing so.

Divination, spellwork, and ritual work can take a lot of influence from fiction. See a spell idea on tv you wish to write and perform for an outcome, you can try that. Wish to base your element work on a system of elemental practices similar to that in Avatar: The Last Airbender, Pokemon, or whichever source you find has lore on the subject? That’s something else you can do. Many fantasy, sci-fi, and other stories, games, shows, movies, and media may display systems of magic within their lore worth drawing inspiration from.

Many deck makers may create cartomancy decks tailored to be fan work of different sources, and these may hold different levels of significance to a user. Two practitioners who use the same Pokemon or Dragon Age tarot deck may read it differently – one viewing it as the same system but with more fun images, and another reading using the characters on the cards to assist in finding each card’s meaning or involvement in the interpretation of the reading. The amount of weight an image of pop culture has to a practitioner is a very personal thing, and no single person can say how much or how little of that should be involved in your practice.

Diving in a bit deeper, we meet those who work directly with entities who originate from pop culture, be this from fiction, celebrities, and the media around them. Just as there are so many views towards what pop culture magic is, there are even more views on what the entities are, where they come from, why they’re here, and why or how one should contact them.

In my personal experience and belief, these entities are created in the same way as any other deity or spirit from classical mythology: through the belief, thought and invested energy of their followers and those who invest in or create their stories, for whatever purpose. But that’s my personal belief, looking at it from the perspective of chaos magic, deity creation, and god forms. Others may believe in theories such as the Multiverse, or the inherent belief of these entities to exist whether or not their stories exist in our world. Beyond this, the ways and reasons a person may contact or be contacted by these deities varies. Some may outright worship them as another would a god of their religion, and others may not view them as to be worshiped, but worked with for the purposes such as learning and magical influence.

There’s even those who are connected to their entities to the point where it is their religion, worshiping them as one would a mythological deity, and can refer to themselves as pop culture pagans. This is more of a devotional approach to working with these entities. These people may practice pop culture magic, but are not always practicing such. Just as not all pagans are witches or magic practitioners, not all pop culture pagans will practice pop culture magic. It’s more like a venn diagram with overlap, rather than either being a subset of one another. Whether or not the devotional or religious approach to working with pop culture in a spiritual sense is beneficial is entirely up to the practitioner. Any pop culture practitioner may view themselves as a pop culture witch, a pop culture magician, a pop culture pagan, something else entirely, or any combination of those. Because of this, I’ve avoided the claim that pop culture paganism is a part of pop culture magic, or the other way around. Though there is much overlap, they are not logically the same.

As a practitioner myself, I work with my patron deity, Giratina from the Pokemon franchise. I view Giratina as it has told me it views itself, a mass creation through the investment, thought, and energy devoted by at least a couple million fans. I do not worship my patron, however seek its guidance and knowledge that have been collected by these millions of thoughts which formed it. I also work with, from the same franchise, Dialga, Palkia, and Lunala. Each has their own skills and fields of knowledge, and each brings something new and important to the table of my life in turn for the respect, offerings, and energy put back into them through this practice. Mutual benefit, I’d say.

When asked about the subject in the server I manage for pop culture practitioners – Pop Culture Magic Central – varied responses were received, even respectfully disagreeing with one another. One member emphasized “I think I’d just like to share that in my experience, pop culture witchcraft is less about the actual entity existing, and more about a connection to what that entity stands for. Alternatively, it is also very thoughtform focused”. Another member spoke up to disagree in the discussion, stating “I would rather emphasize that pop culture witchcraft and paganism are as broad of categories as the fandoms and cultures they draw from. None of my entities are thoughtforms, and my own practice is heavily dependent on the entities themselves”.

Further Readings:

1. The Pop Culture Grimoire and Pop Culture Magic 2.0 by Taylor Ellwood

2. A Look at Pop Culture Magic by Heather Green - https://wildhunt.org/2015/07/a-look-at-pop-culture-magick.html

3. What is Pop Culture Magic? by Taylor Ellwood - https://witchesandpagans.com/pagan-studies-blogs/magical-transformations/what-is-pop-culture-magic.html

4. Pop Culture Witchcraft, Chaos and the Left-Hand Path by Jasper Jacobs - https://mechanicalwitch.tumblr.com/post/185946522860/pop-culture-witchcraft-chaos-and-the-left-hand

 Citations:

Storey, J. (2018). Cultural theory and popular culture: An introduction. Routledge.

Ellwood, T. (2004). Pop culture magic: An exploration of modern magic. Stafford: Immanion Press.

Ellwood, T. (n.d.). What is Pop Culture Paganism? Retrieved from https://witchesandpagans.com/pagan-studies-blogs/magical-transformations/what-is-pop-culture-paganism.html

[jaymarlowgirlinnovators]

Fun Home - Book Report

What Girl Icon does this book represent? 

Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic is an autobiographical, coming of age story that maps out Allison Bechdel’s journey to self acceptance. Throughout the book, Allison describes in incredible detail her relationship with her parents. Throughout the book, she feels as if she doesn’t have someone to help guide her through her most important adolescent years. She has many questions and feels there is no one to answer them. With her father specifically, she immerses herself in books because that’s what he is interested in. 

Does the book's narrative serve to add a new voice to the theme of adolescent transformation previously absent from the literary genre?

I think that the message of this book is one that we have seen in many works of literature, HOWEVER, the execution was transformative. 

How would you describe the rite of passage aspects of the story?

There are many moments that are relatable in this book. Her parents clearly cannot stand each other and her mother needs a sounding board. She eclipses Alison on many occasions such as revealing her father’s affair when she decides to come out. When parents don’t love each other the way we think that they should, it can be very isolating. A part that stood out to me was when Alison felt that her father valued their furniture more than her. 

What aspects of Girl Power does this book explore?

Be who you are and don’t judge others for perhaps taking a different path. Alison has always felt different. She wants to dress differently and wear her hair differently than other girls. She fights her father wanting to put barrettes in her hair just because he feels that is what girls should do. She confesses that she has always wanted to dress like a boy and is determined throughout the book to explore those feelings. Determination is a prominent theme in this book. It’s clear that Alison doesn’t get the support she needs at home, so she turns to books and outside experiences to fill in those cracks. Although I think she sees her mother seeking pleasure in theater to fill her void, Alison wants to take things a step further and ask the tough questions and deal with the answers that she is given. For her father, she is a pillar of strength. As he navigates his own journey, he sees her as the only one to have intellectual conversations with.

What is break-through about the book (design, representation, diversity, etc)? 

I found the layout of the book really exciting. I was never a comic reader as a kid so it took me a second to get into the flow, but once I did, I finished in a flash. Making this a visual outlet allows us to take Allison’s emotional journey with her. We see throughout that her parents aren’t looking at her when she speaks. Seeing their nonchalant reactions to her forces us to root for her to find a community that will see her. Another element to note is the representation of the female body. From Allison questioning the changes her body is going through to her appreciation of her college girlfriends body, I feel the representation is done in a tasteful way.  

Is there a film, TV or theatrical version of this story? Does it live up to the book? 

I unfortunately did not see the musical when it was on broadway, but I remember seeing a lot of the clips and Tony Award performances. What is so special about this performance is that even today, I rewatched it and can pinpoint many moments of my childhood where I felt different and didn’t know what to do with that information. As a musical theater actor, I connect with music more than any other artform so I think that the musical can elevate the meaning of the book to those who operate in a similar fashion.

[tinymixtapes]

Interview: Oliver Coates

Composer, producer, and cellist Oliver Coates recently released Shelley’s on Zenn-La, his third solo full-length and first on RVNG Intl. The album relies on a peculiar splicing of IDM, distilled pop, and faint folk that manifests a multicolored, amaranthine microcosm. Located on the fictional planet Zenn-La, it is home to an apocryphal amalgam of Shelley’s Laserdome, the fabled Stoke-on-Trent nightclub from the late 80s/early 90s, and a futuristic dance floor whose inhabitants are possessed by a perpetual, time-displaced dance to the sounds of early rave, electronica, and minimalism. Shelley’s on Zenn-La is both a synthesis of previous works and a departure in Coates’s diverse and fruitful career, his projects and collaborations almost too many to mention. In the realm of classical music, he is the primary cellist for the London Contemporary Orchestra and has worked with the likes of Laurie Spiegel and John Luther Adams. Outside of it, he has collaborated with Mica Levi on 2016 album Remain Calm and with Laurie Tompkins on 2018’s Ample Profanity; contributed to Radiohead, Laurel Halo, and Mark Fell records; and performed with Steve Reich, Terry Riley, Dean Blunt, Actress, and Genesis P-Orridge. He has also participated in the making of several film scores, including those for the masterful Under the Skin with Mica Levi and The Master and Phantom Thread with Jonny Greenwood. But on Shelley’s on Zenn-La, Coates is alone, acting as both a playful tinkerer and a studious composer. Coates builds the record’s song structures by challenging himself, looking for noises that sound gorgeous and meticulously incorporating curious segments into wider narratives. Tinkling FM synthesis and drum sequences composed in Renoise are contrasted and augmented by processed and transformed cello lines. Here, his trademark cello becomes another source of samples, equipotent with all other effects he employs. In a way, Coates creates his own all-encompassing instrumentarium of sounds, as idiosyncratic as the fictional world he explores and one that is only occasionally visited by Kathryn Williams’s enveloping flute, Chrysanthemum Bear’s ethereal vocal lines, and Malibu’s spoken word. We caught up with Coates to talk about Shelley’s on Zenn-La, among other things. --- Shelley’s on Zenn-La emanates a warm and welcoming feeling, a certain sense of optimism. Thanks! At the mastering stage, I asked for it not to be squeezed like commercial electronic music, so that we might preserve the internal dynamic balances as much as possible. I think coldness perceived in electronic music may partly be connected to listening fatigue, where pounding transients are all peaking at the same level and eliminate dynamic relationships between instrument groupings. I’m anti music feeling as if everything is brick wall limited. I don’t need the kick drum to shake anything. It connects back to the music: I have this background playing Bach cello suites where some of the best bass notes are imagined or implied rather than heard because there’s not so much scope for polyphony on a monophonic instrument. I sometimes like skeletal textures, where the listener is coaxed into imagining parts of the music image. More room for fantasy that way. The album and its title evoke a sort of British retrofuturism. It sounds bittersweet and melancholy, but ultimately optimistic. Like something that Sun Ra would have made had he been clubbing and raving in the late 80s and early 90s. Were you guided by a concept while working on the record? There was no concept, just having fun making tracks for RVNG. Towards the end, that title came to me. The tracks were describing the environment of this impossible space. I edited the album down into something tighter against that image, depicting a series of buildings, public pleasure activities like in Brave New World, and the topography of the outlying countryside and nature. The music also seems to be a personal reflection, a soundtrack devoted to certain places, London chiefly. Is this something you’ve consciously tried to achieve — using the music to capture and channel subjective impressions of certain areas, neighborhoods, and cities? Is it at all nostalgic? Perhaps. London is not that important to me culturally. It’s fun to be with your friends or singing in a choir or something. I see failure and friction and busy-ness for its own sake. The terror of being still. I wasn’t consciously describing anything when I was coming up with the music, more listening and seeing what happens. Shelley's on Zenn-La by Oliver Coates I sometimes like skeletal textures, where the listener is coaxed into imagining parts of the music image. More room for fantasy that way. Has your work with Lawrence Lek, which must have been impressionistic on some level, provided you with any guidance while constructing Shelley’s? I think Lawrence and I have always shared a similar fondness for the adoption of real spaces and transforming them into fantasy. In that context, does any of the day-to-day sociopolitical stuff seep into your work? Making a music LP, I hope to constitute an experience more than a takeaway message. My nature seems averse to tribal or ideological thinking. I’m more interested in friendship and family and effecting change through relationships. More interested in chatting about Beckett than Br_x_t. Shelley’s often reminds me of a contemporary (re)interpretation of the IDM/techno/dance scenes of the late 80s/early 90s. Were you chasing that particular sound? Nah, none of that first part rings true. I wasn’t reinterpreting or interpreting anything. I was guided by pleasure, which sounds a bit dodgy, but also giving myself mini-technical challenges such as two simultaneous bass lines (“A Church”), two imaginary drummers in different acoustics going crazy to one click track (“Cello Renoise”), wonky scales, and fake Gaelic folk music (“Charlev”). The album has a very distinct flow that feels quite deliberate. Yet, given some of your previous work, I can’t help but wonder whether any of its parts were improvised? Improvising is there, for sure. I have just enjoyed this twix bar a great deal. On this release, I edited it quite heavily. The residual ghosts of improvisation are sometimes what fascinate you; they somehow have higher authority over your conscious self. I might edit over and over, then go back 10 stages to find a set of performance actions you made when you weren’t remotely aware of what you were doing or what the shape was going to be — these always seem to be more compelling. Many of the tracks were much longer, and I was heading for double-album territory. I had a good chat with Matt [from RVNG] and decided to cut it into a manageable form. Eight hours of ambient cello patterns bouncing around in Pure Data can come later. Do you prefer working within improvised contexts like Remain Calm with Mica Levi or fully composed and premeditated? Changes all the time. I feel comfortable with certain people around, being in a room with certain people gives me a good amount of ideas that seem fresh. Sometimes I like the hard and fast decisions that have gone into composition, because they’ve been made painstakingly. Looking at your solo releases, there appears to be a progression in your approach to the cello. You use its unaltered sound on Towards the Blessed Islands and subvert it to produce unexpected sounds on Upstepping, while on Shelley’s you rely more on sound synthesis and electronic effects with the cello pushed back. That first solo record is an album of performances of music written by other people (David F/Hennessy, Laurence Crane, Larry Goves, Max de Wardener, Iannis X). I think the answer to this question lies in live performances that are centered around live cello performance. I play a New Age melodic sound with ambient synths, Romantic cello lines juxtaposed with aspects of digital music which I trigger and manipulate with my foot controller. I hope I can make more music for records in the future that is actually closer to my live stuff and more about nuanced live cello playing and computer music juxtaposed. More interested in chatting about Beckett than Br_x_t. In that sense, “Prairie” is somewhat of an outlier, with the cello its sole actor. Is there some kind of story behind this specific joyful cut? Years ago, I was approached to make music for an app about the Apollo 11 moon landings. The project got shelved, and I was left with some music I really liked, so I used this one. It was what this record needed. With your focus shifting to electronic music, do you still enjoy the performative aspects of interpreting someone else’s work as a cellist? Yes. Working with Larry Goves, Alexia Sloane, Laurel Halo — there are so many good composers out there. Has your background in classical music influenced your musical journey outside that specific realm? Realms, moving outside, journeys; I like all these connotations of physical play set against music. Classical Music functions a bit more like an industry. I don’t think it’s a type of music, for sure. There’s 800 years of notated music. I turn up on time because of my background in orchestral structures. As both a performer within LCO and someone who creates music using computers, how do these two aspects of your art relate? They both feel like second nature. My relationship with LCO has never been formalized; it’s nice and chill. Editing sound on the computer is about taste ultimately, same goes for how you play the cello. Your music appears in a constant state of flux, yet I wonder if there’s some other overarching theme in your work? There is, actually, but I’m holding it back for the time being — you can’t control things so much on the surface — but yes, there’s a backbone to the progression of each release. Tell me a bit about Ample Profanity with Laurie Tompkins. I’m aware that Tompkins has a very intense and unique creative process. As far as I know, this is the first time you’ve sung on a record, and your playing seems to be pushed even further than usual. We’re old friends, and Laurie T is a fine composer. His music is more extreme than mine (hence the shouting and so on at the start and the arrhythmia), but it’s fantastic to play in a live duo with him. He’s a subversive kind of performer, nuts skills he has, and I honestly don’t know where it comes from. By the way, I sang on track 1 of the first album, Towards the Blessed Islands, “The room is the resonator.” You’ve collaborated with a multitude of musicians from different scenes in different contexts. Do these collaborations affect your solo music? For example, certain elements of Shelley’s on Zenn-La’s sound seem to be hiding in pupal stage on cuts from Remain Calm. No overlap between RC and SOZ-L. Cello playing is there in both, but RC was a quick, fun, lo-fi thing. I can’t accurately say what has been transformative for me — meeting Genesis P-Orridge and improvising/underscoring her reading out Burroughs at Sophia Brous’s Dream Machine event in NYC taught me a lot, just on the unconscious level. Having moved to a fairly remote part of Scotland, are we going to hear more folk influences in your work? Perhaps for the first part. Scottish Gaelic music is very beautiful to me. http://j.mp/2CCRVNn

[nafizrohan1]

When I was a kid, I was never passionate about music. Earlier I was used to listening to songs. I used to listen to most music while I was playing video games like Need for Speed ​​and Grand Theft Auto. Other Times I used to come across classical music at school, Television, and radio when traveling via car. But in nutshell, I never got into music during my early life.

In Middle School, I had a close friend who was really into hip-hop music. I found this genre to be very cool at that time. This was the time when I started to get into music (listening), through my school friend. I started to explore more music since then, and got access to the internet, and was able to discover new music through YouTube. Alongside the rap track list, my music taste did start to get more diverse, I started listening to a lot of pop music as well.

One Day, I came across a YouTube video where a person was playing a Drum Cover of one of my favorite songs by 21 pilots. That Drum video hooked me up instantaneously, it was so eye-opening to me. I found the drum video to be really fascinating. I watched it a couple of times and still couldn't get over watching this awesome video. 

My Music listening expands from here onwards. I started to get into a lot of metal and rock music which has a lot of cool drum-playing on those and started to learn more about how drum works in general. I got so interested that I asked my mom about getting me a drum set. Although she was a bit surprised knowing I wanted to buy drums, she gratefully accepted my request and bought me an Acoustic Drumkit.

My initial days of Drumming were great. I was enjoying my time learning the instrument and was enjoying the process of improving every day. That's when I also started to go to live shows and concerts around town which even further motivated me to enjoy and learn more about music.

Little did I know that playing Drums is gonna be so much worthwhile. Being someone who used to be a non-casual music listener to being a Professional musician is awesome. I've got to enjoy so much getting into the music world and definitely it has changed my life. I think this has to be the best part. Still, today, being a 22 years old guy I still play the instrument as I do when I started 5 years ago and I always love it. An interesting discovery from YouTube at a young age was changed my life and I'm having a great life.

[thebandcampdiaries]

Rachel Wang - SAVE US B4 IT’S TOO L8

May 2021 - Rachel Wang is an artist and songwriter with a focus on creating music that blurs the lines between pop and alternative. The creative possibilities of her sound  are truly endless, and she is always ready to embrace new creative challenges, allowing her music to reach new creative depth and explore new settings, without compromising on her vision. Recently, Rachel set out to release a fantastic new studio work titled SAVE US B4 IT’S TOO L8. The California-based artist managed to set the benchmark really high with this production, as the album is a really good example of how diverse her sound can be. Rachel’s vocal tone is dream-like and mesmerizing, perfectly matching the immersive quality of the instrumentals in her tracks.

The release features eight singles, and there is even room for a collaboration with Glooms and the second track, “Prisoner.” The release kicks off with a track titled “Angel Of Death.” As the title might hint at, there is a darker overtone to this song, but overall, the melodies and rhythms are far from being gloomy and brooding. There is a lot of energy to this release! The aforementioned track “Prisoner” is definitely a cool change of pace, offering another perspective and bringing a different touch due to the collaboration with Glooms. I love albums with at least a collaborative track, because I feel they really bring a nice sense of diversity to a release, and this is definitely a good way to accomplish that. The song “Before You Go” stands out as one of my favorites on the album. The arrangement has a really good way to build momentum, and the song is truly special in terms of how it develops, with a nice emotional build-up. “Smoke Signals” and “FEELINGS” are a perfect middle ground for the album, offering a more melodic perspective. The latter especially, has an amazing piano progression, which goes really well with the trap-inspired drum beat that comes along later in the song. The track “ANIMAL” has a really dark vibe to it, with a huge, boomy synth bass and some gnarly 808 tones that are really powerful. The dark and heavier instrumental has a really cool contrast with Rachel’s melodic voice, giving the song a really cool bittersweet taste. “THE GRAVES” is a mellow piano ballad and it is a very emotional song, starting with poetic lyrics like “Looking at the stars and I think of you.” I enjoy the dreamy, atmospheric sound of this track, as well as showcasing how Rachel can pour hear heart out when she sings. The choruses are irresistible, with a really clever vocal pattern that brings more energy to the arrangement. Last but not least, “NIGHTMARES” is a wonderful conclusion to this album. The vibe of this release kind of makes me think of songs like “Changes” by XXXTENTACION, especially in how the piano and strings have such a big, cinematic feel!

Overall, this album is really fantastic, and it feels like each track has something special to offer. This production is balanced, direct and forward-thinking, with a sound that feels refreshingly modern, yet organic and natural like a classic from the golden age of modern trap, but also exploring genres such as indie-pop and electro. In an industry where many musicians seem to follow the same age-old cliches, it is refreshing to come across an artist who uses music as a mean of self-expression, connecting with the audience on a much deeper level. Rachel is a one-of-a-kind performer, and this album feels very unique and different from most of what you’ll hear out there today, in the best possible way!

This release comes highly recommended if you are a fan of artists as diverse as Billie Eilish, Clairo, Tate McRae, Sia, Halsey, or Dua Lipa, only to mention a few.

Find out more about Rachel Wang and listen to SAVE US B4 IT’S TOO L8 on Spotify, Apple Music, or any other major digital streaming service on the web today.

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rachelwangmusicc/

Youtube: https://youtube.com/channel/UCytYlFNuxljmAAZJqqMyp2g

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/3KjR3JgzRqPyvmF2f6pKQS?si=JjJdEksQTdyASdKX6nr2IA

[gracebriarwoodwrites]

25 Questions Tag Game

I was tagged by the lovely @hklunethewriter! Thank you!

1. Is there a story you’re holding off on writing for some reason?  There are a few. I have documents full of ideas for a mystery novel that I want to write, and there are a few more intense family drama type stories that I could create, but I think I need to be an adult-ier adult before I can pull them off. My main works in progress that I have going right now are, I think, good matches for the level of insight I have.  2. What work of yours, if any, are you embarrassed about existing?Everyone writes cheesy, hyper-dramatic poetry that they wouldn’t show anyone, I think. I’m not embarrassed that it exists, but I’d be embarrassed to show anyone.  3. What order do you write in? Front of book to back? Chronological? Favorite scenes first? Something else? I usually write in chronological order, but I always have at least a decent idea of the endpoint, and I’ll sketch out some favorite scenes out of order along the way. 4. Favorite character you’ve written? I really love Dana in my science fiction WIP. If she were real, I would have so much respect for her strength, her values, and her determination to do what is right. She has flaws, of course, I don’t think she always sees people’s decisions clearly, but she’s still in college, and that’s insight she will get as she gets a bit more mature. I can’t wait to send her on this journey and see how she turns out.  5. Character you were most surprised to end up writing? I really thought that Sam was going to be a throw away character, but nope, he’s in this for the long haul. I’m glad. Using him as cannon fodder would have been silly, he’s too cool a character for that. Also, I didn’t like that I’d be vaguely suggesting that he might have somehow cosmically deserved his fate.  6. Something you would go back and change in your writing that it’s too late/complicated to change now It’s never too late to make changes. If it needs changing, I’m gonna do it (unless we’re talking a few years down the road when I have publishing deadlines, in which case, it’s their fault.) 7. When asked, are you embarrassed or enthusiastic to tell people that you write? Everyone who knows me knows that I write! I never shut up about it, I’m awful. They don’t always know much about what I’m writing, but I don’t feel like I can give people a decent understanding of myself if they don’t know that this is what I do. 

8. Favorite genre to write I have been loving sci-fi lately. I am obsessed with creating the future in a way that (unless you wander out too far) matches a lot of my hopes and dreams. Humanity made it, everyone’s all here, everyone’s culture is still here and still respected, we’ve got infinite diversity in infinite combinations, and the kids are alright. I’m very much a hope-punk type of person, and I feel like I’m doing a lot of that in my WIP. Yes, there’s conflict, but it’s the conflict that comes when a good place needs defending to keep it good. Not everything’s mired in darkness, and the world is saveable.  9. What, if anything, do you do for inspiration? Live. Coming in contact with new ideas always inspires me, new music inspires me, art and photography inspire me... it’s all inspiring if you just let yourself see the beauty in things and never stop asking “what if?” and “why?” 10. Write in silence or with background music? Alone or with others? I almost always write alone, and I’ll usually have ambient noise happening. Music’s too distracting for me, but silence is a little too much, too.  11. What aspect of your writing do you think has most improved since you started writing? I’ve gotten a lot better at creating clarity in my work. 

12. Your weaknesses as an author? I like going on tangents. I want to explore all the possibilities a world has to offer, and in real life, we go on tangents, we aren’t just driven constantly by one sole purpose. However, writing is not real life! Purposeless scenes in a book tend to bog down a story. It’s all got to serve the main purpose, whether you’re building important dynamics or setting the stage for future events.  13. Your strengths as an author? Everything ;) Just kidding. I’m really good at characterization and decently good at setting a scene.  14. Do you make playlists for your work? I’ve got playlists for the characters in the sci fi WIP, but usually, no.  15. Why did you start writing? Honestly? I’ve always loved books, and once I was finally persuaded that I was good at writing, I was like yeah, I’ll make more of these.  16. Are there any characters who haunt you? Yeah. I absolutely love the protagonist of a book I started writing in high school. She was this super-badass princess in exile, but a major piece of the premise got used in another book that came out that I’m not going to name, and it kind of took the wind out of my sails. (To add insult to injury, my mom, who didn’t know what I was writing, got obsessed with said book and was also like “I could see you writing something like this!” which was high praise, but also kind of hurt.) I haven’t been able to get back into the high-fantasy flow since then, and I have a lot more to say in my other projects. Maybe I’ll go back one day.  17. If you could give your fledgling author self any advice, what would it be? JUST KEEP WRITING YOUNG LADY IT DOESN’T HAVE TO LOOK LIKE A FINISHED NOVEL RIGHT AWAY 18. Were there any works you read that affected you so much that it influenced your writing style? What were they? Yeah, definitely. I don’t write too much like these authors, but Eoin Colfer was hugely influential in basically creating my sense of humor, and I always turn to Neil Gaiman when I want to get inspired by the gorgeous power of words.  19. When it comes to more complicated narratives, how do you keep track of outlines, characters, development, timeline, ect.? Oh, look, I found another weakness. Usually scribbled notes somewhere, sometimes.  20. Do you write in long sit-down sessions or in little spurts? Usually long sit-down sessions. Once I find my flow, it’s impossible to stop until something makes me stop.  21. What do you think when you read over your older work? "Oh, hey, this was good for my age at the time!” 22. Are there subjects that make you uncomfortable to write? Yeah. I don’t feel super comfortable writing sexy content--I just feel like it’s a really subjective thing that can squick a lot of people out or just create major awkwardness. Some people write this stuff really, really well, but I don’t think I’m one, and I never want to alienate a chunk of an audience. I’d much rather let my audience fill in the blanks on their own so that everything is to their tastes.  23. Any obscure life experiences that you feel have helped your writing? Yeah, a lot of weird things have happened around me.   24. Have you ever become an expert on something you previously knew nothing about, in order to better a scene or a story? I’ve never become an expert in anything, but I do tend to do at least a bit of research.  25. Copy/paste a few sentences or a short paragraph that you’re particularly proud of. Hmmmmmm... I’m not quite ready on the sci-fi WIP just yet, I don’t think.

I shall tag @luminahart, @gloriawriting, @maximumsuckage, @boothewriter, @thatstupidgirlshow and anyone else who wants to do this!

[nelson-riddle-me-this]

Rules: tag 9 people with excellent taste

Colour(s) I’m currently wearing

Mostly white - I’m wearing my bathrobe. My mom got it for me and it’s great. It’s not the softest but it’s good and it’s got cool blue and grey horizontal stripes on the bottom. Normally it’s very frustrating for her to try to get clothing gifts for me, but she hit the nail on the head with this one.

Last band T shirt I bought

I’ve never bought a ‘band’ t-shirt. The artists I really love don’t have much in the way of t-shirts and if they do, they look really corny. Like I’m not gonna get a Streisand t-shirt and look like some middle-aged empty-nester out grocery shopping.

Last band I saw live

I guess our evening Jazz Ensemble - it’s professional adult musicians - at my school’s Jazz Ensembles concert. They’re great. As for non-school performances, I think? the last concert I went to was a Brian Setzer concert at the Hollywood Bowl with my mom a while back.

Last song I listened to

I tried listening to some contemporary pop from the Love, Simon (2018) soundtrack today and it was really difficult so now I’m at the computer enjoying some tumblr-time and listening to my most-chill and most-favorite Doris Day album.

Lipstick or chapstick?

I used lipstick once for my Katharine Hepburn halloween costume last year and - tbh lipstick is so much work - makeup in general. Like it would be fun to be a girl and wear dresses and be super pretty and stuff - but wo-MAN it’s so much work!

So chapstick. The tube I use is some Burt’s Bees pink grapefruit that I really love. This might sound weird but I only have it because a boy I had a small crush on once asked me to hold it while he changed clothes and forgot to collect it from me..

Last movie I watched

I went to the movies last weekend with @adamsberg​ and another one of my best friends and saw Love, Simon (2018). I really really really really loved it.

I hadn’t even heard of it until a few weeks ago I saw a trailer on YouTube, but I thought it looked great and it was everything I hoped and more. I have this soft spot for angsty contemporary teen dramas like this [The Fault In Our Stars (2014) and The Perks of Being a Wallflower (2012) are also in this micro-genre]. While I love my classics, I also love these great movies that are being made here and NOW! Sometimes I feel apart from the rest of the world - and not in a good way. I wasn’t friendless in high school - but I wasn’t anywhere near as close to any of my friends as any of these movie teens are... as accepted and loved as I am to/by an amazing, small, group of my friends now. I have no horror stories, but I don’t have very many stories and that’s just it - I could have had so much more, but I didn’t. Part of it was because I wasn’t out yet and this film so wonderfully explored that. I highly reccomend it - and not just for the good plot, it’s hilarious and an overall great experience.

Last 3 TV shows I watched

911 (2018-present) 

Sometimes my mom’s taste in first-run television is pretty bad (NCIS stopped being good like a decade ago) but in this case I am totally on-board. Angela Bassett [WAIT HOW IS SHE 59???????] is an inspiration (I WANT HER CHARACTER’S HOUSE!), the writing and production values are generally very good - it’s a solid, interesting show. Still, can anyone tell me what the deal with that middle-aged white lady (who’s a few years younger than Angela Bassett but lowekey looks 20 years older) who dresses like a suburban mom trying to dress like her teenage daughter - like what’s the deal with her dating that guy in his 20s? 

Frasier (1993-2004)

My mom and I watch this show somewhat regularly as it’s on like every flippin’ night on the scourge that is the Hallmark Channel (generally decent reruns, but I hate the channel itself and their original programming is complete trash). In a lotta ways I really love it - it’s hilarious, witty, sophisticated, adult, and has the power to  create a real poigniant moment like you rarely see so fully-realized in sitcoms. 

It has its issues though. Frasier and Niles (especially in early seasons) can get annoyingly whiny/snobby. I get that their characters are kinda built around that, but there’s a point at which they take it too far and it becomes disengaging. Also it’s a super white-people-centric show (I wonder why Hallmark likes it so much...) so diversity could be a lot better. Still, it’s generally a high-quality program.

Gosh I don’t remember what else I watched last. I haven’t had a lotta TV time lately so Imma use this opportunity to plug...

Stranger Things (2016-present)

One’a my best friends, Grace, introduced me to this show and I absolutely love it. The period’s really well done - not just accurate, but alive and real and relatable. The acting and casting is great. Winona Ryder is a treasure and I have a shameless crush on Joe Keery’s amazing hair and the person it belongs to. The scoring is effective, interesting, and very different from the kind of film music I usually am exposed to (I’m really making an effort to expand my horizons beyond classic orchestral sounds lately). The production values are great - it’s just an amazing show. 

Last 3 characters I identified with

1.) Simon Spier from Love, Simon (2018)

While there are some things about him I definitely don’t identify with (message me personally if you wanna know specifics- I don’t want to spoil anything), I very much identify with his coming out story and coming to terms with his sexuality on his own terms. 

I feel like there are people who will criticize the film based on Simon’s extreme normalcy - like he’s honestly a fairly stock white, middle-class, suburban teenage boy and, aside from his involvement in theater and ‘ya know liking boys he doesn’t do much that would be considered “gay” - but that’s kinda the point of the film. Being gay is just something that is and anyone can be gay - they’re not weird or whatever just for being gay - that was one of my fears - that I would be treated (or even just feel like) some strange unwelcome outsider just because of this one thing.

I had a long conversation tonight with an older kinda mentor’y friend of mine (though I’m more of the mentor) who’s gay and who was having a really rough night. Among the lotta things he said was that all gay men cheat that there’s no true monagomous love in the gay community and like lightning I shot him down with a fervor and wisdom and riteousness that would make Kate proud (wayto blow my own horn). 

That’s the exact kind of idiotic prejudice that makes people afraid to come out in the first place. It’s fear that kind of small-minded judgmental behavior which was most responsible for me remaining closeted in high school. It’s a hard thing to explain to someone who hasn’t been there because after you’ve been through it, it can kinda feel like nothing afterwards -  all this fear and conflict and it’s really kinda purposeless. You find that people still love you and the people who don’t are really not good people anyway. I wish I had come out in high school, I could have been happier. But I am happy now.

2.) Tracy Lord from The Philadelphia Story (1940)

Dedicated followers may remember I rewatched this one a few wks ago on what would have been a date with me and my crush until he cancelled. That time I saw Trace and Kate herself through lenses less tinted than ever before, but still she’s there in all her glory and all her not-glory. Tracy is riteous, despises drinking and gets very contemptful of what she views as weakness, such as her ex-husband’s drinking problem or Mike’s cynical view of the rich. I am often that way (in large part due to the second-generation effects of my mom’s own east coast catholic upbrining) which has it’s merits certainly - that specific east coast almost ‘puritan’ toughness (I think Dick Cavett, said Bette Davis and Kate both had it) can be a tremendous source of strength and sense. It can also easily become cold, prudish, snobbish, and condesending. I have tried to unlearn these aspects and I am still working on that. This is kinda what Tracy’s arc is about, learning to be human and be loved and to love others.

Though it’s not as recent, the next one that comes to mind is

3.)  Nancy Wheeler from Stranger Things

I already mentioned that my friend Grace got me into this show, but I didn’t mention that I only ever watch it with her. Not that I don’t really love the show - I do - but I like saving it for when we’re together - it makes it more special. 

Anyway, more than perhaps any other single character on that show, I identify with Nancy Wheeler. Regular suburban teenager who’s better - not just a regular suburban teenager - she’s aware of the sort of suburban ‘don’t do much with your life ‘cept rasie kids [not that there’s anything wrong with having and raising kids, that’s wonderful] trap. I also found the episode with her at Steve’s house really resonated with me. Barb telling Nancy “this isn’t you” really got to me. Part of me still has an internal ‘Barb’ that kinda ties in with the whole east-coast ‘puritan’y’ morality but there’s also the part of me that wants to be young and just a person and do cool things with my friends and kiss boys and watch great angsty contemporary teen dramas. They both have their merits and drawbacks - the young side has life but can be stupid and reckless - the old side is wise and careful, but can be paralyzing and stagnating.

Books I’m currently reading

I have a whole slew of books checked out that I’m supposed to be reading (for my own enjoyment).

The Unanswered Question: Six Talks at Harvard     by   Leonard Bernstien

I loved his The Joy of Music so I figured I would like this too. He’s a great music lecturer. I’m only like 5 pages in so far.

Elizabeth Taylor: A Private Life for Public Consumption      by    Ellis Cashmore 

This one I’m a little further on, though most of that was just the introductory timeline of her life with a key notating each illness/medical episode, marriage/actual or rumored romantic relationship, and neaar-death experience (her life is such ‘drama’).

I also have a book about motifs in Hitchcock’s films with the car picnic from To Catch a Thief (1955) on the cover. I haven’t started reading it yet.

And I have some book about Lerner & Lowe, the duo responsibly for My Fair Lady, Camelot, etc...

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This was really really wonderful to participate in. Thank you, my amazing friends, so much for tagging me @adamsberg​ and @in-the-key-of-d-minor​. I’ve enjoyed lots of asks and tag games, but I’ve never felt this good about one before...

I tag

@hildy-dont-be-hasty @tyronepowerbottom @reluctant-martyrs @thevintagious @littlehappyrock @n2ninvisiblegirl @solasdisapproves @hepburnandhepburn and @her-man-friday

If I didn’t tag you but you wanna participate, have at it!

What’m I gonna do, fire you?