#my swinger experience

[fever4theflavor69]

So.... someone suggested that i share this with you all. I wasn't sure how it would go over but I am going out on a limb here. Please be gentle.

I have been lucky to have had a very fulfilling sex life. There have been things that have brought me great pleasure. There have been things that reduced me to tears. As with all things, there is both good and bad. I have made some bad choices in my life that led to those unfortunate experiences, however I do not regret them because they have made me the woman I am today.

I don't hide who I am. I don't ever judge anyone for their sexual likes, fetishes, or Kinks. That being said, I don't feel like anyone should judge me for mine either. When I am asked about my experiences or my fantasies I answer honestly because that's who i am.

This is the story of Our short lived swinger experience

Some years ago my husband and I decided we wanted to spice things up in the bedroom so we looked into the swinging lifestyle and joined a local swingers club. We begin chatting with the other couples on their chat board, and once we became trusted, we were invited to attend one of their parties. We were nervous yet excited and anticipated the night of the party to come for weeks.

On the night of the party, my husband and I drove to the address that we were given and arrived at the house. There were many cars there in that sort of freaked us out a little bit. However, we went to the door and was greeted by the hosting couple, who introduced us to the room of about 15 other couples. Everyone made us feel very comfortable.

The first hour was a lot of mingling and drinking. We all then retired into a large basement parlour filled with couches and futons. The lights were dimmed, and soft music began to play. And everyone started to kiss and fondle each other. My husband and I being the newcomers, naturally, everyone kind of flocked to us. We were the fresh meat so to speak.

There was lots of fun going on around us but a lot of action happening to us. I started out with several women and I didn't even notice it happening, but at some point it became mostly men. It wasn't until six or seven men began to undress me that I had even noticed the women were now across the room servicing my husband orally.

The men began to undress me and pleasure me sexually. I was being kissed licked groped fingered etc. I was overwhelmed in a good way. I felt like a porn star in the center of an orgy. I reached up and took the dicks into my hands and started to stroke them, while other cocks being put into my mouth, my pussy, and being slapped off my tits and nipples. All dicks that penetrated me wore condoms. That was crucial and a rule that me and my husband set forth before anything happened.

I was completely into it. I moaned loudly and really let myself go. I embraced every second of it. This was my fantasy finally happening and while it was a little distracting to make sure that I didn't exclude or ignore anyone, I was able to completely tap into my own pleasure.

It was completely enthralling to be sucking cock after cock. All shapes and sizes. To have all these strange men lusting me. To be fucking me savagely. To be exploding all over me. It made me feel like a filthy slut... But in a GOOD way.

During this, I looked across the room to see my husband surrounded by women and fucking them well eating another one. Sure I became jealous but also super excited because it looked like he had a harem and he was a king or a god. And I was okay with that because I knew I was the one going home with him. And who was I to be jealous while I wore 10 different guys cum?

We were allowed to shower at the house before we left and went home and for the most part people were very friendly in accommodating.

THAT NIGHT

In months to come other parties happened and the people became less friendly and less accommodating. They started to become pettier and jealous that me and my husband were getting all of the attention. So much so, that we stopped being invited to attend parties.

Our fun was short-lived, but those few months certainly fulfilled certain fantasies that we both wanted to experience. So well it wasn't perfect both me and my husband came out of it ahead of the game and relatively unscathed.

[blankwashed]

TOJI FUSHIGURO - SLUTTIN’ IN THE CAFE

“mmm yes cling on to me baby, you’re so fucking wet for me y’know?” he tightens his grip around your neck. “ma fucken’ slut aren’t ya? drippin’ wet before the store closes, before daddy can feast on ya….”

your only reply was to yell moan at the pleasure your boyfriend was giving you. his large hands were snaking up your shirt, cold hands touching your hot flesh making you shriek. you needed him, you needed his thick cock sliding down your throat as you gasp for more.

“s-so cold…” you mumbled, just a whisper to him. toji smirked at how fucked up you were at this point. breathless, dripping and shameless. the shutters to the cafe weren’t brought down yet, giving a possibility to whoever would walk pass the store late at night.

“ya like it don’t cha? hmm?” he peppered kisses on your neck to your sternum. “wanna be a little public swinger, huh?”

you were lost for words, eyes and mouth drooling with tears and saliva. all you could do was to nod, unsure of what he would do next. looking into his green alluring eyes that hinted on years of experience and wisdom. they were telling you a story that only you could fulfil.

toji’s smirk darkened and licked his lips sensually, “but all of this..” he referred to your clothed body, “is mine. no one else gets to see what you have beneath your clothes other than me, doll.”

he didn’t like how you were silent and gave your ponytail a tug, making you yelp. “c’mon doll, you can do better than that can’t you? show daddy how he’s making ya feel,” toji continues as his face was centimetres away from yours. your heart was beating so fast as if it was on a race track and you were sweating with drops trickling from your forehead.

you tried to unleash yourself from his grasp, only inches away from him. as each button was removed, you noticed his breath was getting heavier and louder, as if he was a jaguar ready to pounce on its prey…before he stopped you.

“leave ya apron on, doll.”

confused, you followed his orders, stripping yourself naked except for the pink frilly hello kitty apron.

“…like this, daddy?” you asked, timidly but also clearly flustered. toji nodded and lifted your chin up with his hand, “perfect, kitten.” he said.

you suddenly were anxious, worried that security or the boss of the cafe were to step in unannounced. your eyebrows furrowed and you bit your lip while looking back and forth from the windows to toji.

he noticed your worry but only gave out a chuckle, “doll, im not going to close the doors tonight. because….you’ve been a bad, bad girl..”. you were confused, bad? what did you do today? all you did was serve drinks and cakes to the customers.

“b-but daddy, i didn’t do anything!” you tried to voice out but all that came out was a squeak. your unoccupied hands were playing with the frills of your apron.

“oh where should i start, doll?” he brought his hands to your waist, bringing you closer to him, ass facing his cock. he ground his hard cock against your dripping hole, making you whimper. “you were wearing a low-cut shirt today, weren’t cha? were you trying to tease me or to get me angry huh doll?” he growled into your ear.

it was true, you did wear the low-cut tee to tease him but you didn’t know this was what you were going to get. “s-sorry daddy! n-no more, i wont do it anymore i promise! i’ve learnt my lesson, please dadd-!” you cried out as loud as you could. as you were whimpering, toji gave your round ass a loud smack.

“AH!” your tears flowing even more at the impact of his hand.

“this has happened to you before my sweet doll, haven’t you learnt your lesson yet? or are ya trynna get daddy angry again?” he leans closer to your face after turning you around. gripping your face with his hands, you were able to see each detail of his muscular face.

you knew that the only way you were able to make him forget about your misbehaviour was to suck his cock. but..with the windows and door unlocked?

it doesn’t matter to you anymore whether anyone saw your public display of sex. if you don’t please daddy, he’s going to ruin you. kneeling down on nothing else other than the cafe’s floors, you brought down his jogger pants, always a choice for toji who has a thicc dick. its loose enough to hide his dick when he’s hard.

“fuckin’ slut…only thing you wanna do is suck me off, don’t you? such a fuckin’ slut, should tie you to my dick next time…” this wasn’t his protest but it made you salivate more. toji brought his hands to grasp your hair into a pony tail again, “girl, i think you’ve got to bring your hair up more next time..its going to make everything easier y’know?”

nodding, you started to take inches of him into your throat. his cock was hitting the back of your throat causing you to gag and make sounds that were music to his ears. “faster, bitch. and use ya hands..do i have to teach ya everythin’ again?” he mocked you while you were a slobbering mess, eyelash fallen to god knows where.

your mind only had past memories of toji cumming right on your pussy, your stomach, your face, your bed, you name it. it was fuel for you to help him teach his peak. on the other hand, you felt so dirty having his rough hands around your private parts. his tongue drooled on the pink nub of your pussy.

he’s nose deep into your soft pussy folds. “oh daddy, when have you not made me feel good?” you let out a sigh while letting his cock out of your mouth. you were unruly at this point, with only one goal in your mind, to make him cum all over your face.

toji was having his hands in your hair, bringing your face closer to his torso. the veins of his cock, bulging, ready to burst at any time. the cold air from the air-conditioning hitting your perky nipples, making them irresistible to toji.

“mmm daddy, cum already…my mouth’s tired..” you pouted, mouth away from his dick but your hands still jacking him off.

“ya’ sure? want me to cum already, dirty slut? c’mere” toji aligned himself, millimeters away your ass. he also knows how much you love it when he smacks your ass, he gropes and places his fingers through your hole. as he pummeled his cock deep into you, you let out throat screams of “ow!” and “ahh!”s.

“too much fo’yah, kitten? gotten so tight..stranglin' daddy's cock” he smirked and continue drilling till you became limp in his hands.

it was too much for you, the public sex, his large hands touching your skin. “fuck daddy…i’m coming, please please let me cum daddy!” you shouted while trying to grip onto any of his flesh in your reach. “same here, doll. we come at the same time mmkay?” he sped his hips up and grabs plush of your breast in his hands. the pain brought you to an overdrive, making you reach your climax almost immediately.

“floor, slut. lemme cum on your face, what a dirty slut…cumin’ before me huh..” he pushed you down into a sitting position and aimed his cock in front of your face. your feeble hands were trying to assist him but were whacked away by him. his eyes were closed and breathing was ragged when he splurged over your tiny face.

with your eyes closed, you licked your lips for the taste of his cum. toji chuckled, “c’mon. im sure the security guards are patrolling soon. and remember, your body is only mine.”

i couldn’t sleep i needed to finish this. this was a fantasy of mine when i was working in a cafe as a waitress fr :3 sometimes it got so boring with the lack of customers, my mind just goes places.

[raelemond]

today we had someone write into the bdsm group I help run; she was quite nervous about attending, given her previous experiences with swinger parties and such. I figured I'd share my response here, too, since I've seen a lot of people anxious about the same things she is.

Hi!

BDSM parties are definitely not like swinger parties. You're welcome to wear anything you feel comfortable in; we've seen everything from elaborate corsets and dresses to sweatpants and t-shirts! Just make sure to keep it street legal outside. This is a Halloween party, so people might be coming in some Halloween wear, but there's no pressure to wear a costume. I think K will be coming in a minion onesie. :-)

But yes, this group has been running for more than 30 years; I'd say the majority of people have partners they attend with, but not everyone does! Plenty of people come just to socialize and don't play.

My best suggestion as to how to fit in is to relax, enjoy the food, watch a few play scenes once they get started, and talk about your interests with others.

[imthegayone]

The Goliath

Summary: Roller coasters were never your favorite but when your girlfriend wants you to ride one, how can you say no?

Warnings: mentions of anxiety of riding roller coaster, passing out on a roller coaster, and not the best writing

Author's Notes: I'm very new to writing, but @wol-fica asked for this and tho someone said they had it covered I wanted to give it a try :) I've also never been on the Goliath but I looked up a video and its a hard no for me. But I hope you enjoy and I hope your next cup of hot coco is exacty how you like it 🩵

(p.s. I'm also kinda new to crushing on Jenna so if she's a bit ooc I'm sorry)

Word Count: 892

__________________

When you suggested a trip to Six Flags with Jenna and her sisters, you imagined odd food and maybe a ride on the Wave Swinger. Not a ride that was so tall it struck fear into you the second you laid eyes on it. The Goliath, the name alone made you wanna speed walk in the other direction. Towards the food stand with tables to share a huge plate of funnel cakes with your loving girlfriend. 

The same loving girlfriend that was leading you to the long line of people waiting to experience the thrill of having their hearts jump into their throats. Maybe you were being a little dramatic but the impending doom you felt as you listened to the people scream at the steep drop overpowered any other thought. You were terrified, but the clear excitement Jenna was feeling made you believe that you could be brave enough for her. 

However, as the line shortened and the ride grew taller, you began to question why you agreed to risk your life. “Thank you, I know rides aren’t your favorite.” Jenna whispered as she leaned closer to you so no one else could hear. She knew that you were only doing this to make her happy and the way she looked up at you made you realize just how much you’d to achieve just that. 

“I just hope your sisters don’t realize how sweating my palms are.” You whispered back earning a chuckle as you wiped your hands down your pants for the 100th time. The feeling of her hand slipping into yours brought your attention away from the ride and back to her. A smile making its way across her face that made your heart quicken from something other than fear. 

The moment was broken as the teenager controlling the ride motion for your group to get on. You were feeling confident as love for your girlfriend surged through you but as the safety bar lowered to your chest all confidence you gained disappeared. Jenna grabbed your hand again, gaining a scared but grateful smile from you. 

Creaking as the cart started its journey on the track to the steep incline and your quickened heartbeat was all you could hear. The desperate prayer that the torturous wait would be quick was never answered. The slow trek up the incline felt like hours, the suspense making you nauseous. 

Reaching the peak you closed your eyes tight, the grip on Jenna’s hand turning ironclad. “Oh, fuck.”. 

_______________

Your hands were still shaking as you entered your shared apartment. Your feet mindlessly taking you towards the couch. As you plop down onto the cushions you think you hear the sound of the kettle being put on the stove and cabinets being opened but think nothing of it. 

After a few minutes of staring blankly at the wall you see Jenna enter the living room with two mugs in hand and a hesitant smile. “Hi baby, I made you some hot chocolate.” Placing the mug into your hands she gives you a kiss on your forehead and settles in next to you. You take a sip of your drink, the warmth of her and the chocolate grounding you. 

“Thanks, J.” You sent a smile her way as her free hand played with the baby hairs at the back of your neck. All of the sudden the memories of the last hour come rushing back making you groan. 

“Do you think Aliyah will post that video of me.. passing out?” Jenna chuckles but it dies as she sees you frowning. “She won’t.” The reassurance falls flat as she tries to hide her growing smile as your checks redden. “Oh my god she will!” You place your mug down on the coffee table and cover your face with your hands even more embarrassed than the moment it happened. 

The laugh she was trying to cover up bubbled out as she gently grasped your wrist pulling your hands away. “Baby please, it’s gonna be okay, I promise.” You knew there was more by the look in her eyes. You were gonna kill Aliyah, or at least beg Natalie to give you some embarrassing baby pictures of her in revenge. 

“She might've already put it on her story, only on close friends though.” 

“Oh god. I’m never living this down am I?” The responding laugh was enough to know you were doomed to have that video haunt you for the rest of your life. 

“Look at it this way, now you're truly part of the family. We all have some embarrassing things over each other. You saw the post my mom made when she learned I smoked.” That pulled a chuckle from you, remembering just how embarrassed Jenna was when she read it. She swore she wasn’t leaving the house ever again. 

“See I made it through so everythings gonna be okay!” Jenna says with a smile, pulling you into her until your head is resting on her chest and your body lays between her legs. Your hand slips under her shirt to feel even more of her comforting warmth against you. A hum escapes you both when she wraps her arms around your shoulder and kisses the top of your head. 

“Thank you for trying the ride for me Y/n, even though the Goliath took you out.”

[polyamzeal]

I thought of myself as possibly poly in one of my last relationships. But afterward, I realized a lot of our relationship was toxic, and I was grasping for love wherever I could. I dated someone after them, and he seemingly "checked" the boxes. But I still felt like something was missing..

In a roundabout way this is me asking... how do you start being poly? I don't want to disappoint someone with my lack of experience or knowledge. And if poly isn't the answer for me I'm worried that if I find someone who is poly, I won't be enough for them by myself.

When I first learned about polyamory it resonated so much with me but I was scared of being a 'poser' basically if I said I was and then later decided I wasn't. So I put in a month of intensive research! Looked up all the books. Listened to all the podcasts. Found numerous web articles. Joined social media groups for it. Attended an in-personal meetup. After that month I felt confident saying that yes I am polyamorous.

Ever since i have met so many people how just decided they were polyamorous like it was no big deal. Everytime in my head I scream, "YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO DO THAT! YOU NEED TO PUT IN THE SAME WORK I DID!" LOL

So a lot of different approaches work. I'll remind you that it is not a simple binary, as simple as that would be. I have met a lot of people who are not 100% monogamous but they still wouldn't want a completely open relationship. Some people are swingers but don't want to be open to an emotional connection. Some people would be okay with a closed triad but not more freedom. So I would suggest working on figuring out what you want (or at least think you want). And then whoever you meet just talk and compare notes. You only need to be "poly enough" for the people that you are in a relationship in. So don't focus on disappointing others, focusing on finding the system that works for you and then from there find people compatible with you.

[boolger]

I see n9, 'The cruise of desire"... tell me more? ( •̀_•́ )

YESSS BC THIS !! This will be my new big project 🫡🫡🫡🫡

Basically, it was bc I saw a TikTok (ofc) back in early march, about these “pleasure cruises” ish. An adult cruise, which is typically called a swingers cruise, which isn’t necessarily what it is - but it is a cruise where public sex is permitted certain rooms and generally a lot of kinky people go. As fair as I’ve understood. I’ve never been, so I don’t know exactly what it’s like, but I’ve looked through some of the cruises websites and watches some videos - and though the websites keep it vague, it’s just… kinda what that is, a sex cruise low-key lol. With a lot of rules ofc.

SO I basically thought: what if Gaz and his partner, reader (maybe married idk) basically goes on a cruise like that and meets most of the other cod characters lmao.

I wrote this summary (bc I tend to write summaries down first)

Your boyfriend of several years, Kyle ‘Gaz’ Garrick, suggests going on a life-style cruise, a so-called ‘swingers cruise’, to which you agree, and a couple of months later, the two of you go. On the cruise you meet several different people that you have a great time with - but in particular a throuple, John Price, ‘Soap’ and ‘Ghost’, catched both of yours and Gaz’s attention.

Basically, I will just freestyle the entire cruise ship part bc fuck reality🫡

But like, Gaz who sheepishly suggests it to reader and immediately retracts bc he is afraid reader doesn’t want to - but you do and when they go, they’re both a lil awkward at first, but they just experience more and more kinky stuff.

And I’m gonna switch between them having sex w others together or each on their own, bc I think Laswell and her wife wants to take reader apart alone, but also just to experience different things and such.

I don’t think I’ll start it until I’ve finished my barracks bunny fic, but yeah… it’s basically one big sex cruise lmao.

And I think they will especially interested in Price, Soap and Ghost, bc they all just really work well together- and I like to think that Price got a bdsm club lmao. And I’m considering Ghost wearing a puppy mask - or some sort of gag that hides his lower part of his face - most of the time. Not even trying to hide how he stares at Gaz and Reader, clearly all feral.

Anyways, so far I’ve written notes w ideas for the 141, Laswell and wife, Valeria, König and Horangi, Alejandro and Rodolfo, Alex Keller and Farah.🫡

That was all my yapping about this one - which will probably be my next bigger project.🫡🫡❤️🥰 Thanks for asking ❤️❤️

[sgiandubh]

The Couple Next Door - a very, very short overview and my 50 cents, in the process

With as little spoilers as possible. My first plan was to make a post per episode, but I quickly realized that would be useless (so much talking, already, plus a very plethoric press ) and risky (the more you write about it, the less able you are to avoid spoiling it and no, that is not this page's editorial line). You will have to do with this short review, instead.

This is the story of a botched swinger coupling experiment, somewhere in the middle of a non-descript, Truman Show-esque Midlands suburbia. Where nothing is what it seems to be and curtains always flutter for a reason. Adjacent storylines complement this sexy & risqué core, which I personally found more interesting than S puffing and panting on top of Tomlinson. Corruption, life crisis situations, lost late pregnancies, a hidden child, bigot parents looking not unlike Grant Wood's American Gothic odd couple (especially the mother, enough spoiling it), voyeurism and privacy violations - this is a LOT to take in. With a bit more tact when it comes to script writing (sometimes things are really in your face and almost didactic: never a good thing), it could have been BAFTA material. It is not, and no, Disgruntled Tumblrettes - not because of S, but because of numerous plot holes, useless plot devices that could have been gags but totally miss the mark (walking little old lady, anyone?) and an overall superficial approach. It's like trying to cram half a dressing into a carry on: burst at the seams it will or you will end up with odd bits and pieces that do not necessarily make sense.

So if you set your bar very high or are poised to watch it in contempt, this is not going to be fun at all. If you have no expectations and also no idea about the rest of the cast, you will find it interesting and enjoyable. I personally think Enoch is a perfect cast, as is the very intelligent Jessica de Gouw: she knows how it's done and she knows where and especially when to stop. Tomlinson, eh - not so much. I have zero idea about how she fared in Poldark, but here I found her inattentive, formulaic and totally cliché. She has some good intuitions, but she fails to deliver, especially at the end. So, that's a 4/10 for me.

Now for S, as I am sure you are all interested to know. After all, this is why I even bothered watching and getting a paid VPN for it. I will say only this: there is a before Episode 3 and an after Episode 3, by far superior. You'll get my point when you watch it. It's not OL, but thank Heavens, it's not Where the Starlight Ends, either. With all the indulgence in the world, I'd say 8,5/10 - not his fault, the script was brutal to Danny ('Take a good look' is a major, MAJOR eyeroll and it did make me spit my Coke). Also, that intergalactic arse makes it on screen for about 5 minutes, which is nothing- so long for Mordor's honest reviews. Last but not least: he tried, bless his heart, to help Eleanor, but to no avail. Sorry.

The most interesting secondary storyline is Alan's, by far. The press shite - meh, that was there just to give Enoch's character a job, I suppose. And the child - it left me completely hungry and there was definitely room for more.

Rewatch? Christ, no.

Overall? a solid 7/10.

Recommend? not to my mum, but to my best -offline shipper- friend, for sure. She'll watch for S and we'll cackle over the phone.

Potential springboard? I hope so, but he still needs a real, well written role. This is decently good, but still not good enough to showcase what I know he is perfectly able to deliver.

Home eye candy takeaway? Oh, come on, the one involving this item:

I mean, what is more sexy than a bear of a man carrying a washing machine like I would carry my purse?

[iloveschiaparelli]

Finding out from my mom that I spoke full sentences at 10 months old and then adding that to all my other memories of being young just feels like a punch to the gut

When I first self dxd autism I knew that my experiences from age 10 up were consistent with autism diagnostic criteria but I only had a very vague understanding of how my early childhood was affected. Like I knew that I behaved the same way but I didn't have any specific examples and at first my mom didn't believe me either, so she wasn't much help. I honestly believed that I must not have presented autism in an obvious way, since it was missed in my childhood.

But since then I've realized/learned several things:

I was speaking in full sentences at 10 months old. Typically that isn't supposed to happen until age 3 or 4.

I spoke incessantly. All the time. To the point where my mom still jokes that they had to "train me to stop talking" (what exactly that entailed I have no idea???)

Throughout my life including early childhood people have asked me to slow down when talking or remarked on how fast I spoke

In my childhood and pretty much through out my life pre-depresion, people would remark on how good my memory was. Especially in my early childhood (4-8 years old) I would get comments like this ALL THE TIME, I just remembered literally everything?

I taught myself to read at age 4. Because I wanted to read the same storybook over and over again for a period of over a week at least, and my caregivers were sick of reading it to me and started saying no when I asked. So I said "fine, I'll just read it to myself." I was reading at a 3rd grade level at least. by the time i was 5. When I was 5 or 6, I read The Secret Garden, unabridged. I remember this because I was really into tinkerbell at the time, it had just come out. TSG was my mom's copy of the book from her childhood and I had to confess to her that I had fallen asleep while reading and the paperback cover had fallen off in my bed.

Despite making my way through the book pretty quickly, I did not understand a lick of the meaning. I just took down the sequence of events.

I often sat down and arranged stones or blocks or my dollhouse elements by category, size, or color. I would also spend times trying to make sure the chains on the swinger were perfectly aligned.

I watched Finding Nemo maybe 30 times when I was 1-3 years old. Like I would beg my parents to start it over again immediately after it finished. At the time my parents owned a wall projector instead of a TV, so big picture. I suspect now that I was seeking out a visual stim because I still find that movie delightful.

Also forgot to mention, we lived in Japan when I was 1-2.5 and I started learning Japanese?? I don't remember it but according to my parents I was already using some Japanese words by the time we returned to the US. And I had learned to use chopsticks.

Dinosaur. Arms.

Picky eating that was explicitly known to be a texture issue. Nobody thought to analyze this further.

When I was 6 or so I was exposed to plush blankets for the first time. It became my dream to own one. I bought my first one when I was 19 and now I own like 10 of them because plush is one of my favorite textures in the world. But girls I would literally sit in bed and dream about owning a plush blanket. For years. Every time I went to summer camp and someone brought one for themselves I would stare at it, forlorn. Yearning.

I would read the science homeschool books excessively. I went into 5th grade Earth Science already knowing everything that we were being taught, because I had pored over geology and physical science books since I was 5. Probably about 5 years old is when I was able to explain how volcanoes worked and the layers of the earth. Also the water cycle.

These science books also included my dad's 100 year complete collection of national geographic magazines. At 2 years old I was able to explain the star life cycle and how black holes formed. As well as what would happen if you fell into one.

Once I gained access to the internet at 14 my knowledge of the cosmos expanded explosively. I became able to thoroughly explain multiverse theory, multiple theories for the origin of the universe, a good deal of the geological history of Mars, Mars's atmospheric composition, and could fully explain how solar flares worked, how Earth's magnetic field protected us, and how Mars magnetic field had disappeared taking the atmosphere with it. I was failing biology.

Transfered schools twice and a year later had to start biology over again, this time aced it. DNA replication was simple as pie.

SUCKED at math. Always.

Sucked at socialization.

Hyperfixated on the Maze Runner movies to the point where I had the 2nd one memorized and would read the credits for fun. Got so into the BTS that 5 years later I went to film school.

LOUD music was my faborite coping mechanism. Just about destroyed my hearing because I would, on a nightly basis, play heavydirtysoul on loop through the Brookstone ear buds I had gotten for Christmas at Max volume until I felt calm enough to sleep. Would also squirm with the music which i now know to be an uninformed attempt at stimming.

Just... how did I NOT get screened for autism as a kid? I was literally a textbook case for what likely would have been diagnosed as aspergers at the time.

My parents were somewhat neglectful at that time because of a lot of reasons, but I don't really fault them for it. Sometimes I forget that they even were but then I remember things like this.

Asked my mom about it yesterday "how did you not think me speaking full sentences at 10 months was weird?!!" And her response was "we didn't know!"

They didn't know my dad was autistic.

They didn't know that hitting your milestones 2-3 years early is NOT normal and likely a sign of a disorder.

They didn't know that repetitive behavior and obsessive organizing is not normal.

If they had known...... my childhood would have been so different. I wouldn't have nearly flunked out of college. I wouldn't have grown to hate myself because of my social skills. I wouldn't have had countless episodes of feeling like I was going to explode out of my skin but shoving it down and chewing on my cheek just to get through the social situation. So much would have been different.

This is why it's so important to spread general awareness of autism symptoms and behaviors. Real and varied examples, not just solely sdtereotypes and nonverbal autistic alone. And not just autism either but pretty much any disorder.

Or at least an awareness about what child development is SUPPOSED to look like, so that parents can flag when things aren't normal.

[astronicht]

20 Questions for Fic Writers Tag Game

@birdylion tagged me, thanks!

1. how many works do you have on AO3?

48 apparently. I started moving stuff over from ff.net pretty late it looks like, 2014-ish.

2. what’s your total AO3 word count?

465,791

3. what fandoms do you write for?

Various! In my heart I sort of consider myself currently a mix of mdzs and F1 rpf main, hockey rpf almost main. None of these stances reflect reality <3 I most recently posted moto gp rpf, mdzs, and hockey rpf-- so hey wait maybe I'm not totally off-base.

The WIPs I'm most active in right now are, amusingly, Stranger Things and Stargate Atlantis, with mdzs making itself known on the back burner.

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

WHO IS WINNING IN THE THUNDERDOME TODAY

the field meets the wood - mdzs, wangxian. The one where Lan Wangji is kidnapped by salt merchants, and Wei Wuxian unmakes them with historical math. I think this is the best prose writing I've ever done and I'm thrilled that it's currently outpacing the other usual suspects.

pro bono - mdzs, wangxian. The vampire AU I wrote as a joke based on a thread for a few friends. Due to a couple shipwrecks and banishments, WWX and LWJ get stranded in the Italian Renaissance; Lan Wangji is also a vampire; don't worry about it. If (1) is my best prose this is the overall storytelling I'm most satisfied with.

2:08 AM, softly - mdzs, wangxian modern AU. About coming home after a bad night out to find someone you most want to see. Prose is kinda weak, alas, but I get why it's up here.

swinger of birches - mdzs, wangxian Practical Magic AU. Coolest writing experience I will probably ever have. I wrote this live, via tweets, over the course of a month. I had a little staging document but i was only two or three tweets ahead at any given time. It felt like-- oral storytelling, or something.

somnophilia in the time of vampires - mdzs, wangxian, sequel to pro bono. Pretty much entirely pwp. I set it in the same inn that Anne Rice set a scene in Cry to Heaven, as a little joke for myself.

What's interesting is that every single one of these was written either directly for someone, or because someone wanted something. I love filling a need.

5. do you respond to comments?

Yeah, some, though it's totally random which ones I get to.

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

salt and vinegar, vinegar and salt (hockey rpf) is literally tagged "hopeful ending" so it's not too bad, but it's not meant to be perfectly happy.

scurvy (mdzs, wangxian) and the fic it follows (floodplain (silt)) I wrote very purposefully to not end with a sense of ease. I care about these characters I lot, and they tend to get softened down in fanon after a while. I love them in the parts of canon when they're miserable and cruel and unable to get better, too. And I needed to write that, I guess.

7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

haha probably swinger of birches (see question 1). It's a romance movie fusion, which helps, but it also leans into the "second chances to have everything you thought you lost in the war" of the canon. Plus the "hey what if we DIDN'T pass on the generational trauma" that is the absolute heart of mdzs.

8. do you get hate on fics?

Once got a serial TERF commenter who was going around. Weakling.

9. do you write smut? If so, what kind?

That's my wheelhouse, baby, that's what I'm most comfortable writing and what I like. I've covered a lot, but idk what the themes are. Except maybe the intimacy of sex in the bathroom/in the shower. I write a passable amount of kink, I guess? I also write a passable amount of lesbian sex. this is because i'm gay.

10. do you write crossovers?

No. I do AUs a lot, including AUs set in another fictional universe, but I don't like crossovers. They make my teeth itch.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

Hope not!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yeah! I have blanket permission for translations, so long as they link back to the original (and with a strong preference that they're on ao3). Someone did my wangxian lesbian scific AU in Spanish, which is cool as hell.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yeah! Well! Okay they're not POSTED but that's mostly my fault. I learned to co-write with @dulosis. phillyverse will take the world by storm! geoverse will be our white whale and THEN take the world by storm! we have a batshit number of words of chatfic from back when I was more active in mdzs. Frankly some of my favorite writing.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

in the pines, the wangxian semi-pro-dom modern AU fic. I accidentally lived out the final scene in real life with a tinder hookup (NOT what you're thinking. I took her out to eat after one of the hookups, and I was not considering fic plots at the time), and it feels kinda bad now to try to write the wangxian version of something that actually meant a lot to me (because i am both a lesbian and NOT good at casual). I think she only reads Star Wars fic if anything, but what if she found it, you know?

Also this one hockey rpf fic that was like, very much about Leon renewing his passport and the deal with living on a continent you didn't grow up on, but also-- kind of did. That's only in the gdocs tho.

16. What are your writing strengths?

You'll know the atmospheric humidity in any given scene.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Goddamn dialogue.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

A few. I've seen a very small number of good fics where bilingual folks are doing neat cultural/diaspora stuff with it, especially in modao with chinese diaspora writers. That's cool as hell, but also not my lane. I've also seen people in hockey rpf do some neat stuff with this with, say, Leon Draisaitl, especially in the context of a non-German pov character learning some German. But in those cases, the best simulation of hearing a German sentence you don't understand is written with dialogue in English interspersed with blanks.

Instead of just writing out full sentences of dialogue in a different lang from the prose, I love being conscious of what language the characters are speaking in. I am much more interested in playing with that, and I can do that best in English. If my characters are switching between languages I switch up the English diction a bit; I remember how names will come up in sentences differently, I think about how something would sound to whisper. For untranslatable things, or stuff that sounds weird in English, I just use the word in the language, in the English sentence, and that's that. I love having to abide by the limitations and abilities of Chinese or Italian or whatever; I love knowing how dialect will affect communication.

The only time a full line of dialogue in a foreign language makes sense is if the pov character doesn't understand it. But it's very unlikely that the pov character will BOTH a) not speak a language at all, necessitating that it shows up in another language from the prose, and b) the pov character can actually ID every single word clearly enough that it makes sense to write it out. So largely I'm personally uninterested in it, because outside of some narrow applications (most of which aren't my purview) it doesn't do much.

That said, Mr Fruits Baske Sohma Shigure speaking random french is perfect. What a terrible man. Love him.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Probably Fullmetal Alchemist, but I'm not sure.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

harsh! harsh! overall, maybe pro bono (wangxian vampire AU). today. tomorrow it will change.

I'm tagging anyone who wants to play!

[creepykuroneko]

I hate it when people who are not polyamorous feel the need to talk about polyamory.

Seriously stop misrepresenting those if us who are polyamorous. We are not swingers (no hate to those who are) we are not all senior citizens looking to get our kicks, we are not sex addicts who are incapable of loving and fulfilling relationships.

Every polyamorous relationship is completely different. Not all polyam couples practice the same way. Some polyamorous couples love to go on double dates with their partners and their partners. Some Polyam couples do not want to meet their main Partners significant others and that is okay too. Some people go on vacations with various partners and some don't. Some are honestly looking more for a domestic partner who can help take care of the kids, get housework done, help with home repairs and that is completely valid. There are also queer polyamorous couples, heterosexual polyamorous couples, polysexual couples, asexual polyamorous couples, it really is a lovely little spectrum of variety.

We fall in love with multiple people at the same time and put our whole hearts into each and every relationship. We are not gross, deviant, greedy, nor are we incapable of the meaningful love.

If anything, I have known more polyamorous people who have known more meaningful deep loving relationships than I have monogamous couples. In my personal experiences, Polyam people are more willing to put in the work into a relationship. I know more polyamorous people who have gone to couples therapy and individual therapy so they can figure their shit out. Whereas with monogamous couples they tend to hate each other openly and loudly with zero interest in becoming better people. I've had situations where something came up last minute and I had to reach out to the polycule to see if someone could help us out at the last minutes notice and sure enough someones other partner was able to help us in a pinch. When my monogamous friends talk to me about how they asked their sister-in-law for help and she told them no because she wanted to stay home and watch videos on her phone all day, I feel so lucky and grateful that that is not my reality.

I love polyamory! I would never want to be monogamous. That does not mean that I ignore when a relationship actually is abusive or toxic. I have spoken to other people about how their partner isn't right for them and ask if they need help. Abuse does happen in polyamorous relationships but that does not mean it is happening in every single polyamorous relationship . Plus last time I checked, the majority of couples who abuse and kill their families tend to be monogamous not polyamorous.

[titus-androgynous-87]

I am baffled that this fucking crusty ass rat lookin white boy named fucking WILDER isn’t the worst one on Couple to Throuple

I hated him the moment I laid eyes on him. I hated his fucking rat face. I hated his bottle blonde mullet. I hated his crusty mustache. And when his partner Corey started talking about him having crossed boundaries before, I -really- hated him

I’m only on episode 6 or 7 I think, and he has actually surprised me. He and their additional partner, Denyse, have been really good about taking things at Corey’s pace. And making sure to reassure Corey that going slow and setting boundaries isn’t ruining their dynamic

Wilder actually said, out loud “You not voicing your concerns WILL ruin the night, because then you’ll be uncomfortable and we won’t know. That’s how boundaries get crossed”

Wilder and Corey are also the only couple who have stuck with the same partner through the entire process. All the other couples have swapped at least once. Which is fine, and the point of the show. But it feels really superficial and gross when the couples talk about their temporary partners like they are objects for their pleasure and convenience.

Wilder and Corey at least seem to understand that polyamory goes beyond the physical. Though I do giggle because it seems like Denyse is way more into Corey than Wilder. And Corey is way more into Denyse. And Wilder seems content being their third wheel

Real “this is my girlfriend, Corey, and her girlfriend, Denyse” energy. But they seem to understand that polyamorous relationships, especially closed triads like this, don’t have to be 100% equitable all the time. People are naturally going to have deeper connections with some folks and not others. Doesn’t mean they don’t all care for one another. Nobody can post anything on SM until after the reunion, which is understandable. But I’d be interested to know if they’re still a triad (closed or open) or if they’ve all gone their separate ways

I’m really just here for Maximo and Ash at this point, because they’re the queer energy this show needs. And you could instantly see how relaxed the singles were around both of them

Both are non-binary, pan, and have experience with polyamory, though individually and not as a couple (which is how I think this show should have been structured to begin with)

They’re messy and silly and a touch toxic, but who isn’t on this show?

The ones I -really- fucking despise are the swinger couple looking to just have threesomes

Fucking humiliating their additional partners for not wanting to immediately get physically intimate, let alone fuck, within the first hour of meeting. Treating additional partners like playthings to be shelved when they’re bored and picked back up at their convenience. Mocking additional partners for setting boundaries and voicing concerns. Mocking additional partners for having feelings and thoughts and hopes and dreams. The, frankly, disgusting dynamic of centering Dylan as the UltraSigmaAlphaBro with two women hanging off him. I hope his dick falls off from all the steroids. And his wife Lauren is no better

They never should have been cast

Ashmal and Rehman are MESSY. And totally using their partner Johnathan to triangulate their pre-existing issues. These two need locked in a room until they actually discuss their issues

Ashmal has never taken Rehman to meet his family. Hasn’t spoken with his family about Rehman, nothing. And they keep bringing thirds in to ignore the real problems

Messy, under the covers handjobs don’t solve rifts in your relationship, yall. A two legged table cannot stand

And I have no fucking clue why Brittne and Sean are here. They don’t seem into each other, let alone an additional partner. They’re constantly running away from criticisms and difficult discussions. They ignore their partners and shut down their concerns. Brittne made it absolutely clear she is to be the queen bee of the group, to be catered to

Which isn’t how a healthy duo works. Let alone a triad

Idk this show has a LOT of flaws. But if they do a second season, I think the singles should have all the agency and focus, not the couples. Gimme a group of like 15 poly/pan/fluid folks and let me watch them form their own polycules

Because if I have to listen to another straight man giggle about threesomes, I’m gonna go into my back yard and eat dirt until the rage stops

I really wish Becca, one of the more prominent singles, had warned the rest of the group about Dylan and Lauren just looking to be swingers. That would have added so much more interest for me

Like how are the singles going to approach them about their toxic and gross behavior? Will the couple grow and learn and change when confronted with this? (No but we’d have fun watching them flounder and cry that no one wants to fuck them, let alone go home with them)

[ok-to-like-it]

What, from your own perspective, is the most perverse thing that you have ever had someone else do to you simply because it aroused or pleased YOU for them to do it to you?

Did it turn them on to do it?

Is them being turned on by doing it an essential part of what brings you your own arousal or pleasure in this type of situation?

For my own part, I will answer these in reverse order. Regarding question three, the person pleasing me being genuinely aroused while doing the perverse things that I like is indeed essential to my interest.

This particular experience was one she very much enjoyed.

There have been a lot of really perverted things we’ve done along the way... But at the moment my answer to question number one would be a gangbang at a swingers club (one we’ve been to a couple times) down in Florida.

Everyone who fucked her pussy did wear a condom, but at least a half dozen men came while fucking her pussy. Some men fucked her with the condom and then pulled out and pulled off their condom to cum on her body. After one guy did this, another took his hand and pushed the puddle of his cum off of her abdomen and down into her pussy while he very roughly finger fucked her while the next guy positioned himself to fuck her pussy.

Several more men came while she was sucking their dicks. Still others came in their own wives’ mouths after fucking my wife and while they watched her continuing to get fucked and groped.

All in all, about 20 men had their dick in my wife’s mouth or pussy at some point in the night.

[polyamorousmood]

Hi I recently came to terms with the fact I'm polyamarous (ambiamorous specifically but that's a whole nother topic) and you've probably been asked this before but... how??? How do you get into a polycule? I have enough trouble confessing to one person! I want my cuddle pile and affection and I have so many people I wanna give love to but idk what I'm doing!!

-Sincerely, confused autistic anon freshly out the closet

So if you don't have a Hallmark-movie moment of falling in love simultaneously with three people who all love you back, firstly, my apologies 😞

Secondly, its okay if you don't find shit right away! If you're just figuring it out, then its probably not helpful to put pressure⏱️ on finding the perfect relationship right away.

Thirdly, just to be clear, you may "join a polycule" without dating everyone in that polycule. In fact, that's way more common.

Fourthly, we're not actually as rare as you'd think. Dating apps are crawling with us. My partner found his latest on Hinge with no poly discrimination drama. Just reject anyone ❌ who says they're monogamous! And while I'm hesitant to give a lot of info about my real life location, I promise its not liberal lol

If you're worried about making that information public, you could always pay the fee💸 to set non-monogamous as a "deal breaker" on Hinge and just only be shown non-mono people, then explain when you match with someone what you're looking for.

Or there are some apps that are supposed to only be for non-monogamous people (which includes poly, swingers, open relationships, etc), though I haven't tried them and can't speak to them, I've heard of Feeld and #open, and I'm sure there's several more.

Fifth, if you live in an urban area, you could check for poly meet-ups. Facebook has some groups, Fetlife has some groups. I don't personally have any experience with them and if you're shy about being out, this might not be the best fit, but 🤷it'd be remiss not to mention them.

or, idunno, start hitting on someone in the notes of this post 🤪😜

[secretplaywife-hotwife]

Hi, I have been following you on various platforms for a while. I was wondering do you ever attend the Splash Mocha events?

https://www.splashmocha.com/

Thank you, John

SecretPlayWife attended several Florida Splash Mocha events without me. She loved it and told me all about it. It made me crazy horny for my wife. At last I went to an event with her and it was MIND BLOWING! Better than I had imagined.

I wrote about my experience by posting twice during the event, followed by a summary afterwards.

Enjoy! Mr Spw

First Post:

Oh My Fucking God!!

Or more correctly,

Oh my beautiful BBC-fucking goddess

She fucked 15 guys Thursday night

She fucked 9 more guys last night

She’s getting dressed to go play again.

One hell of an event.

Second Post:

Climax Count… Lost Count

I have rarely seen my wife climax so many times in one night.

Holy fuck.

Literally.

It was spiritual

Third Post:

Florida Interracial Takeover

Do you remember that cheezy swinger place you went to that creeped your lady out and ended all chances of your having a hotwife?

This was NOT that place.

This was a*m*a*z*i*n*g

A major hotel closed itself off from all bookings so that it could be used exclusively as a lifestyle play resort for three glorious days.

The event managers arranged for security to ensure no one came on the premises except registered lifestyle attendees. All ground level entrances had blackout curtains to prevent passerby peeks, and the main lobby was declared must-be-clothed. Otherwise, it was clothing optional, sexy wear encouraged.

300 people. 5 hour pool parties.

120 mostly Caucasian couples, plus 70 specially selected Black men, all handsome, endowed, respectful, social, and agreed to always use condoms, which they provide.

Women walked around in sheer or scant clothing, some none at all. No cell phones allowed out, and no photos ever.

About 10 ladies were 20-something model caliber, perhaps 30 or so were svelte enhanced milfs, with the remainder mostly 40s lovely women of all sizes, though SecretPlayWife was probably among the largest. All were pretty and all were there for the BBCs.

The Caucasian husbands didn’t play. But the wives certainly did. As much chocolate as they could handle.

Think Spring Break for the milf-40s crowd. Tiny bikinis that come off when the music gets pumping. DJs and speakers everywhere. Large ballroom dancing in the evenings, themed play rooms open at 10pm and stay busy until 230am.

Every play room was a separate large hotel conference room with speakers, each playing a custom music set, each with different colored uplighting, and canopy beds with decorative netting. All had many mattresses with fresh clean sheets changed after every single encounter. Each room was lined with chairs for husbands and couples to watch the various wives playing, but set far enough back that no one felt overly voyeured or uncomfortable.

Saturday night I was sitting in a chair going on my fourth hour of watching my wife scream in orgasmic ecstasy as her sixth BBC pumped her to yet another squirting climax. She was in the central tent while I sat 15 feet away in the low colored lighting with two black gentlemen sitting immediately to my right and a beautiful woman giving both oral. The sounds of screams and moans filled the large high-ceiling hall as six additional women were getting pumped in the various mattresses spread around the room’s perimeter. Two men that had fucked my wife to orgasms the previous night came up to me to chat and we had nice conversations while the sounds of flesh slapping and women moaning melded with the music. People were walking by circling the large room and clusters of people were conversing and laughing throughout. Many more clusters of people were chatting in the large hallways, yet none of the chatter was distracting. I thought to myself, how surreal is this experience. Few will find themselves in such an environment. I felt lucky and grateful for my wife accepting a transition from monogamous to adventurous. I love her very much.

[yuri-for-businesswomen]

if i tell you you are not ready for this interview.

my translation. my commentary is highlighted.

interviewee: ilan stephani who has her own website describing her as a “best selling author”. she worked as a prostitute for 2 years in a brothel and successfully finished her college education. she is a “body coach” now.

„Men are doing terrible sexually”

Ilan Stephani worked in a Berlin brothel for two years. She describes her experiences in her new book.

Miss Stephani, you walked to the prostitution organization Hydra with some friends for a consultation: You wanted to become a prostitute. What did you hope for with this profession?

IS: I didn’t want to become a boring college student. I wanted intense contact. I didn’t have good experiences: My first boyfriend cheated on me with such self-confidence it made me feel the question of power in sex. I wanted to gain social and sexual sovereignty. As a daughter from a good home, I learned how to fluently deal with different people. Those are qualities that were suddenly honored in prostitution. That totally flashed me.

she was emotionally traumatized from her cheating ex-partner and thought prostitution was a fun new adventure. this gave her some wicked sense of control. you can hear the classism from this privileged and educated woman when she calls herself a “daughter from a good home”. off to a good start.

Is that a hunger for life?

IS: Yes. And this is the thing for all men who go to a brothel: I’m hungry for life. And they think a man needs sex for that, which is of course bullshit. Men just learn that they have to experience life like this now. But contact with a smiling person is what enlivens us.

yes girl im sure these men come to you for your smile and because they are “hungry for life” and not because they want to get off in a woman. be for real.

Even though it’s a paid and fake smile?

IS: Yes, people can ignore that really easily.

she admits here that sex buyers know any joy and enthusiasm is fake and simply ignore it to proceed with sex acts. and yet she feels sorry for them.

And that you have sex with men who you don’t desire at all, that didn’t make you hesitate?

IS: It did. But you often have sex in a loving relationship without loving or wanting the other in that moment. That’s more about a feeling of obligation. There is a smaller difference to prostitution than you think. I’ve been working as a body therapist with women for seven years, and they all basically did for free what I was paid for. I had already experimented with anonymous sex. I went to a swinger club and already knew this normalcy and openness. And I was excited for this new social challenge.

so the two options for women are to have sex out of obligation or for payment? girl. also you are generally attracted to your partner, just don't want sex sometimes. in a healthy relationship you would not feel obligated. this was an experiment to her – she is making a mockery out of women who are in prostitution out of financial necessity. i wish she had just stuck to anonymous sex in swinger clubs.

What social challenge do you mean?

IS: All this performance art: For example, you take the money very discreetly, so nobody realizes that a payment has been made. I play that I have to moan exactly now and at the same time I take care that the towel doesn’t move from underneath me. And randomly, after half an hour, our wonderful encounter takes a natural end – and maybe the people also told me some secrets. They talk to prostitutes as if we signed a non-disclosure agreement. I had control the whole time. And usually, the world does not wait for little female students. But these men waited for me.

very normal for a supposed service to pay secretly to keep up an illusion of not actually being a service. it’s true, playing sexual pleasure is a challenge. not something that should be expected of women but okay i guess we’re admitting that prostitution is reproducing misogyny. the last two sentences make it very obvious that her self-esteem is completely dependent on men. another thing i noticed is that she says “people” when in the rest she talks about men. this is a common tactic to obfuscate the reality that prostitution is mostly women serving men.

You worked in a small, female-led brothel, with excellent working conditions. Still: You told the boys they are amazing at satisfying women, even when many can’t really. If I’m being strict here, you supported phallic culture.

calling sex buyers “boys”. nice infantilization to make them seem harmless. otherwise good question that makes it clear that prostitution is inherently anti-feminist.

IS: Yes. Prostitution stabilizes this culture. But as a prostitute, I don’t participate in the patriarchal elevation of the erection. Men fail in phallic culture, that is their problem. They are supposed to have an erect penis, and then it’s flaccid. What do you think, how nervous they often are, when they think they have to bring it now. I hear: “Please release me from the pressure to have to meet these standards.” And I say: “It doesn’t matter whether you have an erection or not. It’s not important. You are alright.” But of course in the end you are right: Women have always validated men under patriarchy and made them feel good.

“yes prostitution supports the patriarchy but -” not interested in what you have to say. take the L. the way she extends so much empathy to sex buyers. i guarantee you they don’t give a fuck and don't think about women and especially prostituted women any further than how fuckable we are. way to reproduce traditional gender roles: the woman as caring, empathetic, taking men’s feelings into account and defending them whatever they do. women telling men they are good enough when they really aren’t. women putting their own desires aside to help and teach men. and yet they will go home and still not know how to satisfy a woman because they pay you to lie to them. but hey she is sooooo self-aware.

That didn’t bother you?

IS: Little. I felt sorry for them. Men are doing terrible sexually in this society. Worse than women, because unlike women they don’t know what they lack. If cumming in women who pretend for them is the highlight of their sex life – how sad is that? The brothel is just one symptom of this poor sex we have.

men are doing so terribly sexually that they can legally buy sex. what is this woman on. this is almost bordering on men’s rights activism. poor men who have orgasms all the time while women have to pretend. maybe the sex wouldn’t be “poor” if men didn’t see women as a means to an end, their own orgasm. but sure you can frame it like her i guess.

What is poor sex – and what is rich sex?

IS: The poverty is that we desperately yearn to touch each other and make each other happy. And we don’t succeed. Women fake orgasms, that is not just a funny topic for the boulevard press. That is a failed communication every time. And men say: The things you like are so boring they make me fall asleep, I need something better. There are so many false expectations. The penis has to enter the vagina, that is such a strict idea about sexuality. And all this in a romantic relationship between two people. Hollywood and the porn industry have commercialized this. And these false pictures cause sexual abuse, sexual trauma for women. And that’s all the fault of the sex we have.

wow, they managed to talk about poverty – but not the impoverished women who are the majority in prostitution and don’t have the privilege to make intellectual considerations about poor little sex buyer meow meows because they have to deal with the abuse. men yearn to make women happy? i have to laugh. and prostitution is helping here how? by teaching men healthy boundaries and communication? again, i have to laugh. she extends no empathy to women or these men’s partners, only to the men who probably cheated on them with her – most sex buyers are not single. and “the penis has to enter the vagina” is literally 90% of prostitution. again, what is she on. so hollywood and the porn industry are evil but prostitution is not? god, please let brains fall from the sky. some people need them.

Now you could say: Kismet [destiny], our sex has become like this, now we have to work through it. You think something else is possible. What would that be?

IS: Good sex has to be freed from definitions that stress us. Thoughts like “sex is only good with an erection”, that’s stressful. We don’t know how to protect our sexuality from these definitions. For example, I discovered slow sex. We laid together for hours, a relaxed and unerected penis in a relaxed vagina. Nothing happened for a long time – except my leg went numb and my boyfriend’s back hurt. But after a few tries, something happened, and it was better than anything we ever experienced. We sensitized our genitalia again. I had my first vaginal orgasm. Yes, dear previous sex partners, the first!

not her talking about “protecting our sexuality”. i don’t even know what to say anymore. prostitution is all about penetration and defining sex to make it a service. she experiments with her partner but sex buyers can’t do that? and she proudly proclaims that none of her sexual partners had made her cum before (at least vaginally). this is such a mess. and now this banger:

Was that the point where you exited prostitution?

IS: Yes. I got bored before that though. And then I went to a workshop, where a group of women was supposed to find our G spot. I was pretty numb vaginally. At first it was funny because we were fingering around in each other with latex gloves, at some point your fingers start to cramp. Well, in the end we found it, and it was such a fluent and ecstatic experience! After that I stayed in the brothel for three weeks. And then I opened my eyes one day and thought: I’m not going there anymore. I was finished with it.

she never even experienced an orgasm before entering prostitution... literally completely unexperienced. and when she realized she could actually feel pleasure and wasn’t merely there to satisfy men she used her privilege to exit prostitution. and because she got “bored”. again, this is a fucking mess. and now she is some sort of body therapist for other women and profits from having been prostituted because everyone fucking loves these stories no matter what the background is. these narratives are extremely harmful to marginalized women in prostitution and play right into men’s hands. why are we not talking more about how a vaginally numb and sexually repressed woman whose partners never bothered enough to make her orgasm entered prostitution and how this is not a good thing? i fucking hate this newspaper because they are so uncritical.

Your bad experiences did not play a role?

IS: Not directly. I only realized later on that prostitution traumatized me. I had one customer who violently had sex with me. He was a smart sadist. A polite, friendly man. But then suddenly he just did what he wanted, touched me brutally and fucked me violently. He didn’t want consent. It was rape, even though it was not rape legally, because I did not say no. He showed me how I’m not able to set boundaries, because I was not prepared for something like this. I think that no woman is prepared for that because we are raised to be these smiling, nice girls.

how is she so aware but so wilfully ignorant at the same time. the cognitive dissonance is insane.

The infamous “she didn’t defend herself”.

IS: Yes. I work a lot with women who say: No, that was not rape, it was in my relationship and I didn’t say no. And I know exactly why she didn’t say no.

Why?

IS: Because we are the smiling girls. Because we are cuter when we cry silently than when we are angry. Our instinct that could prevent traumatization is repressed. The protective instinct: Set boundaries, say no, defend your boundaries. And there is no Yes if you are not able to say No. If we taught girls to say no, before we teach them to wear G-strings, we would reach sexual paradise. Because men would have to progress.

no words.

Don’t we try already?

Do we? I see women who are extremely scared. They’re scared that they won’t have sex anymore if they say no. That the man leaves. And they think, their only turn-on is to be “fucked hard”, to be a vessel. Women don’t know their own strength. Women’s bodies are not inferior to men’s bodies. That is a patriarchal lie. I’m pro sexual feminism. And that’s why I don’t work in prostitution anymore. I can do a lot better things with my sexual power than to say: “I’m your vessel today”.

the only thing that i can get behind in this whole mess. she is not even wrong about some things but the way she frames everything completely releases men from any accountability and she doesn't attack the system prostitution at all, she says the brothel is a symptom of boring sex and not like, woman-hate. and these are the voices that are the loudest in the german debate on prostitution.

[gascreates]

eeeee I love your atla dino au so much!!! do you have an idea of how bending would look different in the dino forms?

aaaa thank you!! im glad you like it!! it feels so great to know that people like this au!!!

actually, bending as a dino was one of my first thought experiments, came way before anyone had any dino designs! ive always wanted to make sure to preserve the whole magic martial arts vibe of atla, even in dino form. and combat is such a big thing in atla that im constantly shifting things around in my head to try and make sure that everything feels balanced. i don't want dino bending to be the definitive replacement for human bending, yknow?

im gonna plop the rest of my response under read more cuz it got pretty long. here we go!

as for how bending actually looks, my thought was that dinos primarily use their head and tails for major bending motions, as most dinos dont have long or flexible limbs that would do much good, at least compared to human limbs. each bending looks slightly different, as with their human forms.

earthbenders are the easiest to visualize to me, as mostly they just do a lot of stomping and head throwing. foot goes down, rock goes up.

airbenders mostly rely on appendages that are feathered, so flapping wings or slamming down a very feathered tail like a fan. i have no idea what a non-winged airbender would do. probably not be very good at airbending.

waterbending is kinda muddy honestly, in my head they're mostly ground based tail and head swingers. less flipping than an airbender, but more mobile than an earthbender. i feel like sokka would use his head a lot though. he's not a bender, so if he wants to get a concussion blugeoning a parasaurolophus, go ahead man.

also also, airbenders and waterbenders can absolutely propell themselves with bending. i mean i guess all of them could if you want, but it's super common in air and water. air dinos flying in dino forms that aren't *quite* built for sustained flight (aang is a microraptor, which is a gliding dino, and not actually able to fly, but with airbending, that doesnt matter!) and water dinos bending while swimming in order to torpedo themselves through the water.

and then firebending is mostly reliant on the tail and legs if possible, basically use the tail as a replacemnt for legs in human form. loooots of roundhouse kick stuff. with a tail. also i was thinking that maybe it's normal to be able to spit fireballs like a dragon? but it's still kinda hard, and something most people can only do in dino form. idk about that one, i just like the idea.

i drew a bit of concept art for this waaay back, but honestly im not all that well versed in how to draw movement, so i feel like the firebender there is the only really clear representation of my thoughts. here's that pic, and a link to the post.

in terms of visualizing the movement, there's this one video game project though called dinoSword by Jean Nguyen that actually really represents what im thinking, even if it's a bit flashy and fast for what i mean. either way, it's badass and might give a good point of reference. absolutely check out their work, here's a compilation of some of their animations

and here's a gif of another one of their animations which i will try so so hard to describe in the alt text

so yeah, all in all super badass! definitely faster and more deadly than what i have in mind, but the general idea about the potential movements and range of motion for these dinos is there

(also a side note, in terms of species for dino forms, my half baked idea is that it isn't really based on nation or bending style as it is geographical location. like, those are obviously linked, but the cause is the physical location. so you can find spinosaurus anywhere you find water, even though it is commonly believed to be a water tribe dino. there are swamp spinos, earth spinos, and yeah, even fire spinos. yes, there are conotations and societal consequences to a fire spino, regardless of how accurate those assumptions are. it got worse with the war

the msot common species for each nation are: mid to large raptors for the fire nation, spinos abd cold weather dinos for water tribes, large herbivores for the earth kingdom, and tiny tiny raptors or flight adjacent dinos for the air nomads. maybe also some lil herbivores, and they just dont get to fly in dino form.)

in terms of what the actual element looks like while moving, i imagine that dinos would have a rougher time with anything that has a huge amount of finesse to it. delicate movements or anything super precise might not be worth it to do in dino form, and most attacks would be more explosive than their human alternative. that whole thing katara did where she incased zuko in a ball of ice in the s1 finale? not happening as a spinosaurus. so while a dino form might give a boost in power, it isn't always practical at the time. not to mention it takes energy to transform, and sometimes it's best to save that for the fight itself.

the general feel of the movements is much more flexible and weirdly athletic than any actual dinosaur would ever be. but at the same time, i want to impose this idea that dino bending, while powerful, can be pretty clumsy, and each dino brings it own limitations. large dinos like sokka and katara are automatically slower, and in fights like the ones we see in atla, that really matters. small dinos like aang and toph also have to deal with how lightweight they are. their natural defenses are to run and hide, so they dont get much in terms of physical equipment the way a large carnivore or herbivore would. they're much more reliant on their bending to stay safe than say a big ol ankylosaurus, who's built like a tank.

SO. that's my big infodump agdkhsjf. i have maybe possibly thought a bit too much about this au. thank you for the aaaask!! so sorry if you didn't expect a wall of text x3