#my search is futile | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

solar-eclipsed · 9 days ago

Text

Amelia …. Amelia I love you …. Amelia ….

#eclipsed.txt #I’m honestly still so devastated that she just doesn’t really matter in season 2 #and that the interview about her said like. nothing #like mannnn I get that the point is that she doesn’t exist outside of the show but at some point it just like #but at some point it kind of just detracts from her humanity and her desperation to go home #like okay. why does she want to go home then?#if no one knows her then what is she looking for?#but I digress. I love her a lot and I wish I got to know more about her #and see her more #I will prance around with my au where Liam was the doomed winner and Amelia was the martyred protagonist forever #Amelia … let me save you …. let me save you Amelia …. Amelia ….#this about hfjone by the way #to all of my dozen followers who weren’t there for that I hope you get a kick out of searching it up #I get a lot of her character is just to demonstrate the futility of it all and that’s why she doesn’t do anything in s2 because her actions #don’t have impact on anyone #not even really the audience #but uhmmm *writes my own au that creates my own favored version of a doomed protagonist #*that focuses on my favorite character extensively #I want to watch the futility destroy her I want to watch her fall apart :(((

5 notes · View notes

suzakushimon · 1 year ago

Text

NOOOO PPL ARE SPECULATING THE NEXT FGO EVENT WILL FEATURE TITANIA BC IT HAS A LB6 CLEAR PREREQ BUT I DONT WANT TITANIA TO BE A REAL SERVANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fgo pls don't pull a sike actually titania is real and oberon CAN reunite w his wife moment

#my mumbles #making titania an actual being and not just a concept is😭😭😭😭#idk I feel like it'd twist a lot of oberons words and motives into something different!!!!!#bc then we have proof she Does exist so the impact of him searching for her despite knowing its futile becomes. different #GOD IDK. FEAR FOR THE EVENT

20 notes · View notes

snixx · 9 months ago

Note

Apna title witness protection rakh le

hahahahahaha. no

#ghost 👻#atp anyone can find my blog with minimal effort tbh its futile. now i just change urls because i am like this #you just need to search kavya on tumblr to find me in 0.2 seconds at this point. cant go back

5 notes · View notes

piceuscelus · 11 months ago

Note

Most memorable scene? Aiden “testing” out sex slave Ciri

wait was that me or did that get written FOR me

I have the memory of a moldy orange someone help

#celus speaks #dead dove #dead dove: do not eat #if anyone has the link to this one pls share #i remember it but i cannot find the draft in my docs and tumblr's search function is futile

5 notes · View notes

enbeemagical · 9 months ago

Text

Hey this is a bit of a weird request but if you've rb'd any of my OC stuff would you mind deleting it if you can? I'm trying to move it all away from this blog and onto @averi-kalis

#hoping to publish and decided a little too late i'd prefer to have a bit of separation between my original work and my fanfic #it may be futile but please help me try #also the personal info there is not quite the same as here #it's still me but like... the edited version i'm ok sharing with irl people #my writing #<- for searching purposes if i need to

4 notes · View notes

nerdie-faerie · 1 year ago

Text

Was thinking that saw kinda gives me final destination franchise vibes and clearly I'm not the only one seeing as they were in the recommended section at the end

#Horror movies #which is just as well cus those are some of my favourite movies dont judge my poor taste #was looking to see if the next one was in the recommended section or if id have to go back to search #and it was half final destination half other saw movies just not the second one #its the futility of it all. you can try as hard as possible to avoid death but in doing so you have to make the decision as to whether #staying alive is really worth it in fd you have to spend the rest of your life looking over your shoulder waiting for the axe to fall #slowly going insane or in saw you have to do something you might not be able to live with anyway you might have to weigh up your life #against someone elses only to not make it out anyway because you cant do all that you need to idk theres just a lot on the weight of a life #i need to watch more saw to truly figure it out

6 notes · View notes

crossbackpoke-check · 1 year ago

Note

I TOTALLY KNOW THE SID STORY ABT THE BIG MACS YOURE TALKING ABOUT AND I ALSO HAVE NO IDEA WHERE I SAW IT??? godspeed in your quest to find this bit of Lore i thought you'd want to know someone else knew what you were thinking about <3

😭😭 it’s me and you against the vast expanses of the internet but i’m so glad someone knows what i’m talking about!!

#💕💕💕💕#liv in the replies #THANK YOUUUUUU #somebody knows!!! someone understands!!!! the search is not futile!!!!!!#have been sitting here like ‘are you sure you didn’t read this in a fic. is this a fic? is this even real?’ so confirmation is helpful 😭#for reference i did one time (i say one time this was for like MONTHS) look for an interview house tour of kevin hayes’ house that i thought #existed with nolan in it & dearly beloved. it does not. it was a line in a fic that my brain accepted as a fact i think. i’m so reliable.#but literally??? the way my brain works is an encyclopedia of OH THIS REMINDS ME OF THIS but it’ll be something from like. three years ago #& finding anything is 🫡 it could be something i haven’t thought about in MONTHS & i’ll see a post and go ‘oh that au!! that reference!!!’#in the same vein: any fic i have ever read is eternally with me & @ fic authors i think of u always. things remind me of ur work that’s love

8 notes · View notes

howifeltabouthim · 2 years ago

Quote

. . . in search of something I'd never find—sense, reasons, life itself.

Catherine Lacey, from Biography of X

10 notes · View notes

crescentmp3 · 1 year ago

Text

having to help my mom find a song she's searching for is definitely something

#she interrupted my messaging with my classmate to ask me for help. i've been trying to help for more than forty minutes #the best description of it she can give me is she heard it on a cat video compilation where there was a cat with a watermelon hat #(she thinks the cat's eyes are like that of a noble queen)#and she says it goes something like ''meow meow pao papapaow mew'' with a melody.#it's futile to keep searching at this point. but she's still holding out hope #i don't know how we did it but i also made her listen to the first few minutes of painkiller in the process #🌙rambling

2 notes · View notes

daedrabela · 2 years ago

Text

btw did you know your upbringing and environment play a role in the development of schizophrenia because i just learned that a few days ago.

#actually schizospec #actually schizoaffective #actually mentally ill #i remember when i'd fight with my mom and it was always just so paradoxical like there was never a way to be right or do right by her #so when we'd fight i'd go to my room and cry and my mind would desperately search for a way to make sense of what had happened #but because its was always the opposite of what i thought i should be doing i would end up in hysterics #i'd just keep thinking i was never going to do anything right and the futility of it eventually caused me to break away for a bit #i'd start laughing uncontrollably at how completely fruitless it was to try and get everything right #when just one mistake would erase all of my progress #and i remember how it felt to detach for the first few times and i was terrified and i felt so hollow #i felt like i was trapped inside my skull and i couldn't escape even my body if i tried #all the while i was still laughing and crying at the same time because i was so sad and so confused at all of it #i literally felt like those edgy pics where a character is split in half and one side is laughing while the other is crying #i would rapidly switch between laughing and crying and then eventually i would just. stop.#i would stop crying and laughing and emoting completely and i'd just feel a numbness spreading #i wouldn't have at thoughts at all i would just be laying there on my bed staring #ALLLL of this happened while i was alone in my room after fights with my parents (usually my mom)#and my mom LOOOOVED to yell and make comments and call me names from across the house so ofc that made it even worse #🥀

2 notes · View notes

maemil · 2 years ago

Text

One thing I do find very interesting about both of said Barriss episodes (s2 e6&8) is the way they both kind of focus on attachments. In Weapons Factory when it seems like Ahsoka and Barriss are lost, Luminara is immediately ready to move on/let go, and Anakin is insistent that they keep searching. Then in Brain Invaders, Ahsoka chooses not to kill Barriss, even at her request.

Interestingly, both times the person being influenced by their attachments was right. Ahsoka and Barriss were still able to be helped, Barriss wasn't unsaveable. I don't know if it was an intentional choice to exhibit examples of why Anakin would keep choosing to ignore attachment rules, but it was interesting.

(Of course, in the very same episode Ahsoka refuses to kill Barriss, Anakin is force choking some guy for information because he's so worried about Ahsoka. So like... shock of shocks he's not doing great with it)

#my brother was very annoyed by how quickly luminara gave up on her padawan #im willing to cut the character some slack and put it some on writing instead #like it was rushed but theyre also only 20 minute episodes #imo if they had searched for a while and found nothing. with luminara pointing out they have a duty to continue on because staying here #searching futilely will potentially put them/their position/the war at risk #and anakin just unable to accept it no matter the genuine downsides to continuing to look (and inevitably being correct to keep going)#it would work fine as an ideological conflict between the 2 of them that doesnt paint luminara as so cold she wont even take a *sec* to loo #sw clone wars #tcw rewatch #tcw meta #the clone wars #clone wars

2 notes · View notes

bor-ous · 2 years ago

Text

goodbye, komaeda

#jon voice #gmod #decided to post this because it was such a good fucking time #i had to edit back in the music though bc my snip didnt get the audio and i wasnt aware til i played it back :/#lmao whatever enjoy nagito komaeda's crucifixion #4 march 2023 #<- for my later searching lol #my ass tried to make this as accurate to when it happened as possible w the song and the fucking room reverb #bc of the jukebox addon we were using #sadly my futile punches / wowozela / and tails' screams from being hit #at the end werent able to be reproduced but hey thats alright #stuff with riley #<- also for my future searching

4 notes · View notes

lordsmellio · 2 years ago

Text

Homestuck ran for a very, very long time. It was a popular internet zeitgheist/meme/subculture that spread its tendrils throughout the vast and unknowable depths of the internet. It can definitely have everything relate back to it, even if only indirectly. That is how deep the roots have dug.

"this thing [homestuck] can't have everything" top 10 naïve and hopeful phrases of all time

#smellio reblogs stuff #my 2 cents #i have searched the darkness of the pit #and found only the inescapable honks #and candy corn horns #there is no escape #only willful ignorance #and defiant resistance #the latter is ultimately futile

20K notes · View notes

aria0fgold · 3 months ago

Text

Btw it's 3 am and I'm here having the worst day of my life while everyone is asleep. I should've been asleep along with em too already but nooo, my body wants to torment me instead.

#aria rants #im gonna be running round and wakin everyone tho if anything gets worse again i aint havin it!#still monitoring chest pain btw and also futilely searching my symptoms in google hoping for anything useful other than: you are gonna die

1 note · View note

fungisteri · 5 months ago

Text

you know the state of independent online communities is fucked when the first thing you do upon finding a new site is going straight to the rules and seeing if they allow csa/bestiality

#the horrors. good god the horrors #that's right I'm still in my futile search to escape this fucking webbed site (it won't work)#(at this rate I'll be here until the site is unplugged whether I like it or not)#(and at this rate I want it to get unplugged so fucking bad I can't take this anymore)#fungi.txt #csa mention

0 notes

skyborneveggie · 8 months ago

Text

We’re sitting on the edge of a starsystem-sized Miles Davis record, slowly rotating around the sun. When I wake up, a year from now, will I find myself still here, in the exact same place? And if I fell asleep til the end of the world, would I wake up to find the cracked precipice of time? Like the slope of a jagged eggshell, myself the size of an ant. Could I climb up, and out, and escape?

But the end of the world already came, and went. Apocalypses only start time loops, never end them.

Click, click, Apply.

I look past my knees as they dangle helplessly from the vinyl edge; into the dark cosmic answerless question of space.

#some word art on the futility of the job search because i'm going nowhereeeeee 🙃#my writing

1 note · View note