#my sanity was going haywire

[wwooyology]

no lube, no protection, all night, all day, from the kitchen floor to the toilet seat, from the dining table to the bedroom, from the bathroom sink to the shower, from the front porch to the balcony, vertically, horizontally, quadratic, exponential, logarithmic, while I gasp for air, scream and see the light, missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, doggy, backwards, sideways, upside down, on the floor, in the bed, on the couch, on a chair, being carried against the wall, outside, in a train, on a plane, in the car, on a motorcycle, the the bed of a truck, on a trampoline, in a bounce house, in the pool, bent over, in the basement, against the window, have the most toe curling, back arching, leg shaking, dick throbbing, fist clenching, ear ringing, mouth drooling, ass clenching, nose sniffling, eye watering, eye rolling, hip thrusting, earthquaking, sheet gripping, knuckles cracking, jaw dropping, hair pulling, teeth jitterbug, mind blogging, soul snatching, overstimulating, vile, sloppy,moan inducing, heart wrenching, spine tingling, back breaking, atrocious,gushy, creamy, beastly, lip biting, gravity defying, nail biting, sweaty, feet kicking, mind blowing, body shivering, orgasmic, bone breaking, world ending, black hole creating, universe destroying, devious, scrumptious, amazing, delightful, delectable, unbelievable, body numbing, bark worthy, can't walk, head nodding, soul evaporating, volcano erupting, sweat rolling, voice cracking, trembling, sheets soaked, hair drenched, flabbergasting, lip locking, skin peeling, eyelash removing, eye widening, pussy popping, nail scratching, back cuts, spectacular, brain cell desolving, hair ripping, show stopping, magnificent, unique, extraordinary, slendid, phenomenal, mouth foaming, heavenly, awakening, devils tango ever bro could cause a nuclear bomb inside me and I'd still ride.

[hearturn]

.

[moonlight-prose]

You asked for old man! Logan thots. I’m gonna give you old man! Logan thots. Also, hi hehehe 🤭

SO, my favorite thing about him other than the fact that he’s fucking old as dirt, is that even if he’s very rough along the edges, he’s also the tiniest bit pathetic. Sure, he’s giving, he can be soft when he wants to be especially if he’s too tired to care, but he probably just likes sitting you on top of his face and licking and sucking away at your pussy after a long day at work. Or he likes to have you on his lap so he can touch you through your underwear, maybe even grind and hump you through your clothes as he kisses you.

To me, old man! Logan is the perfect mix of pussy drunk and just enjoying pussy as it comes. No rush, no fuss, he’s just here for the vibes lmao.

note: the sound i made when reading this is beyond feral. please excuse my mind going haywire beneath the cut. i have no excuses. i just really love this old man.

Old man Logan is done with having to pretend he's incapable of feeling pain. After near a century of getting bruised and sliced open and treated like an animal, he deserves some time to just be. And with that comes the need for intimacy. He never got the luxury of it before - never wanted it.

So he's absolutely a little pathetic about getting his mouth on you; entirely at ease to suck at your clit languidly as if you're not shaking above him from too many orgasm too fucking fast. He's fucking knackered. He's pretty sure if he tried to fuck you into the mattress, his skeleton would give up.

You're clutching the headboard with tears in your eyes. Thighs strained with how many times he had you ride his mouth. You're pretty sure if you look down you'd see nothing but glazed hazel eyes and a furrowed brow.

His mind shut off an hour ago; his body taking over to do the rest. And you've become the means to an end in order for him to find some sanity to cling to. He's gone dumb with it. The taste of your pussy the only thing he really needs after a long day.

Other times he'd drag you on his thigh, mouth open and panting into yours with high choked sounds he'd never admit to making. He'd kiss you stupid. Spit and teeth and just a bit of your slick from where his fingers were knuckle deep in your mouth.

Tonight though he's got you seated right where you wants you. His cock is a leaking mess on his stomach, but he can't fucking care.

Especially when you brokenly sob above him, another wave of slick pouring into his mouth. He grunts, fingers digging into your thighs, and suffocates himself.

Far too lazy and slow for you to even notice. At least until he forces another one out of you; his mind a blank slate of white noise as you struggle to breathe.

[dreadfullydevoted]

HA- got em

im considering making another sona rn. it is very dififucult.. RUHG

I’ve come to bother u.

hi hi hi hi hi what is UP

[midnight1nk]

So, this week's episode...

[spoilers below cut]

...sighs

looks like i owe my sibling 10 dollars ← betting that the sonic 3 episode would come out

(the following is my live reaction:)

so Costco, eh? and with Meggy, Melony, Mario, and Bob? This will be interesting

as always, you gotta have your conveniently placed "World's Biggest Meat Grinder" there ofc 😌↕️

Bob... PLEASE REPHRASE wtf dude

not in this economy, no (not even eggs are worth it)

new bed? wait what happened to the...oh

"you're not my friends anymore" [*gets war flashbacks*] oh god, there was Mr Puzzles, then Tari, and now Melony got this line

"Ink, they reused old audio before" and yet the pattern is there. Puzzles and Tari feared that they were gonna lose the people they held dear. And if Melony had this as a nightmare, the same can be said. As to why, hmmmm *game theory theme starts playing*

uh anyway here's Melony being cute :)

fun fact for the day: NEVER LEAVE MARIO AND BOB UNSUPERVISED

can we get them in those kid backpacks with leashes?

Meggy, what are you talking about? We HAVE to get the racecar bed!!

also Meggy don't say that word, the fandom's already going insane over the steam and flareglow mystery as it is ← says a theorist who has already gone crazy

y'know I should've suspected a racecar bed to be an actual car (I was close tho)

never thought we would get this Mario and Bob dynamic again and y'know what? I'm all for it! It's a nice different flavor of chaos I could get used to

It IS important, it's to see the mattress's durability and stiffness bc back pain is just awful (there goes your spine). plus, we aren't getting one that was found by the dumpster

can we get a pillow fight in an episode? SLEEPOVER EPISODE?

things would've been worse if we were in IKEA, Meggy

oh... we got Leggy again...

well, a new thing is that she can change at will. BUT I think it kinda defeats the purpose of Leggy "off to a better place" back at WOTFI 2024. I think it could've been done better at a different episode when her past trauma overwhelms her and turns into Leggy, even more if Mr Puzzles escapes and finds her. I know for a fact that no one has gotten therapy and Meggy did say in the New Year's Special that those were traumatic memories.

Basically what I'm saying is: Meggy thinks her trauma (as well as everyone else's) is past them bc Mr Puzzles is in solitary confinement when it's really not, and THAT will eventually reach a certain limit ← this could've been executed better if Leggy wasn't in this episode and let Puzzles marinate some more, hopefully that makes sense

also Leggy's screams kinda give me sensory issues but that's me thing ANYWAY BACK TO THE EPISODE

ofc if you find the perfect bed, you're already dead asleep :)

THERE'S THAT LINE AGAIN, I'm telling you it's foreshadowing

AND AGAIN AUGH

love the Danny Phantom theme add-in

...WAIT NONONO YOU CAN'T JUST LET IT PASS BY WITHOUT ME NOTICING THE SAME BED USED IN WESTERN SPAGHETTI

"...Ink" Just let me me have my moment of exaggeration, I'll come back to sanity in a second

hey, i'm just living proof that a theorist brain can go haywire at the smallest things

"I work everywhere" Shroomy 🤝 Karen

FLASHBACK TIME YESSSS

...oh....can we talk about this for a second?

The fact that Melony's past has been recontextualized again and again, it somehow makes sense. Well, kinda.

All of Melony's memories are through HER point of view. We can take the conversation between her mom and dad as true but we might not know how far this problem is.

Hear me out: in the role of a child, you would view your parents as friends (depending on how much you see them caring for one another) since the concept of romantic relationships/marriage is a bit more complex to know at that age. It's why Melony interprets her mom leaving them as the friendship ending between them, "you aren't my friend anymore". Again, Melony was pretty young when it happened but it truly stuck with her, and this mentality of "friendship ending = losing them forever" as she had it with Axol Jr. in that nightmare (the closest thing to Axol when she lost him) and then to her friends.

Now, I'm not sure if I should include the memory trip from Revelations (bc of her not remembering having a family at all) but regardless, I think Melony blames herself for her parents separating in the first place. It's normal for children in a scenario like this to believe they are the cause. As said in Revelations, Melony thought she was a "bad daughter". And in the nightmares she had, SHE believes to the cause of losing those friendships as well.

There is still that gap of time between her growing up to when she debuted on the show so the question is: did she leave her dad behind bc of the past guilt she had? And perhaps had even more guilt afterward to leave her dad by himself after everything?

The image of a perfect family in Revelations and her being the "bad daughter that has forgotten about her family", it's pretty sad to think about, and no doubt I feel bad for her :(

EVERYONE NEEDS THERAPY STAT

Mario being the voice of reason, we love to see it

guys, it's not a baby smh /silly

oh good Melony's okay... right?

and the episode ends, we got a bed at least :D y'know, it's just another Saturday

Congrats to alex-dolmatescu2-0 (here on Tumblr) for your art being featured at the end credits! 🎉

we're just not going to think about the implications as to why the Team decided to pick it for this episode, still great fanart tho :)

also this,

i think it was an editing mistake lol (...or IS IT? jkjk)

.・-: ✧ :--: ✧ :-・.

Well, chat, this is a good episode. I wouldn't say that it was a life-changing, plot-driven episode but it was okay.

Ofc I did love the Mario and Bob dynamic and some depth on Melony. There were definitely things, like the Leggy part, that could've been executed better/be placed in a better episode.

The year has started so I don't expect much to be absolutely perfect from the Team, they're trying. I still enjoyed it, don't get me wrong.

Then there's stuff whacking at my theorist brain but we don't need to talk about that.

And apparently, we got a new member on the Team, Max Sturz (also known as WizardzWiz)!

They're the writer and storyboard artist for the SMG4 show so hello, welcome! Very excited to see what they're gonna be working on in the future!

(so for future reference, I'm gonna call them Wiz)

That's all from me. I'm just gonna be in my little tent until SOMEBODY responds to the steam + flareglow mystery. Remember: numbers always go first, and I'll see you guys on the next one!

[pennysperfectpolls]

Adoption poll round 2 match 15

Natural Harmonia Gropius “N” (Pokémon)

Emil Sinclair (Limbus Company)

Propaganda under the cut

“N" Natural Harmonia Gropius (Pokémon) Propaganda

Listen. Liste-N, even. N is in desperate need of a better family. He grew up with Pokemon, and was then "adopted" at a young age by Ghetsis, who wanted to use his ability to communicate with them. From the moment of his adoption, N was isolated from most humans and was only given the opportunity to speak with Pokemon who had suffered at the hands of humans. This pushed him to the direction of Pokemon Liberation- He believed by separating people and Pokemon, the world would be perfect. And Ghetsis only encouraged it, forming Team Plasma and crowning N as the king.

Believing N to be fully brainwashed and unable to be deterred, he set N out to preach and convince people to release their Pokemon. As the story goes on, N is challenged by seeing many people and Pokemon getting along and enjoying each other's company. He's stubborn about it for a long time- But when you finally beat him in the final stretch he finally starts accepting that maybe he was wrong- That maybe different ideas in the world CAN co-exist, as can people in Pokemon (though not needing Pokeballs is definitely still a thing he would like to happen.)

And this... Well, what do you think Ghetsis does?

He goes haywire! He calls in good-for-nothing, warped, defective, a freak without a human heart! My poor boy not only gets his worldview shaken, but the guy he considers his dad just loads up on the insults- No doubt to intimidate him! N deserved soooo much better than Ghetsis, which is why I'm submitting him for Tumblr Adoption. He is able to start healing later- Like look at his battle sprite between Black/White vs Black/White 2! He's smiling! And his encounter theme! It's so much more cheerful in BW2! It's not called "Prisoner to a Formula" anymore- It's "N's Theme"!!!! He so deserves blorbo title. From start to finish, a prisoner and tool to learning what he wants and who he really is! He's N, babes, and I'd give the world for him!!!!!!!!!!

Also he says "Burn, baby, BURN!" in Pokemon White while awakening Reshiram. This is so important. To me.

———————

had a crush on him as a kid and now i think he’s neat

Emil Sinclair (Limbus Company) Propaganda

poor boy went through so much tough shit and then just kept going through it, he needs some love.

his whole family was murdered by one of his only "friends" and then she continued to torment him psychologically, even when she wasnt in his life anymore. and then he had to join a brutal company that requires him to kill lots of people and die repeatedly, which he is not equipped for mentally.

oh also one of the best ways to use him in gameplay requires keeping his sanity as low as possible. lil bro needs a break 😭

[thompsborn]

(“You don’t have to do this,” Peter told him after his first day back on patrol. Harley was leaning in close, much closer than Peter could mentally handle, as he examined a blooming bruise on his temple. “I’m fine.”

“I don’t trust your definition of fine,” Harley was quick to reply, though his words came out distracted as he brought up a hand and gently brushed the tips of his fingers along the edge of the bruise. “You’ve told me that you’re fine a lot since I’ve met you, and now I know that it hasn’t been true a single time. I’m just making sure that you really are okay. For my own sanity, mostly.”

Peter felt the back of his neck heat up with a blush that he could only hope Harley didn’t notice. Still, he rolled his eyes and said, “I think I have enough experience to be able to tell when I’m okay or not. I mean, I have been doing this since I was fourteen.”

A small tug, barely visible, more like a twitch of the lips, pulled at the ends of Harley’s mouth at that. He didn’t look upset, per se, but he definitely seemed disgruntled as he leaned back and dropped his hand to his lap. “Yeah,” he murmured. “I guess. Just…” Trailing off, he shook his head and then hesitantly met Peter’s gaze. “I just want to make sure,” he said, hushed and almost a little bit sheepish.

That response made Peter pause. He released the hem of his shirt from where he had been anxiously twisting it between his fingers, let it fall back into place. For a moment, silence hovered, and just when Peter was about to part his lips and ask what was wrong, Harley suddenly spoke up again.

“What was it like? When you first… When you became Spider-Man.”

There was a crease between Harley’s brows, but his eyes were genuine and curious as he peered at Peter.

“Um.” Peter faltered, thinking. “The first couple weeks kind of sucked, honestly. My senses were suddenly going haywire, you know? I could hear people talking from blocks away. The temperature felt a lot more intense, too, like… what would have just been kind of cold suddenly felt freezing, and what would have been kind of warm made me feel like I was about to pass out from the heat. And with my strength, I kept breaking things and not being able to explain it when May asked, and it just—it was… it was a lot.”

Harley nodded, looking entirely and hopelessly enraptured by Peter’s every word.

Peter continued with, “Thankfully, May thought I was sick and let me skip school for a few days. I had to convince her to go to work and leave me home alone, but once I was able to, I used those days to try and get used to the world again. It was really overwhelming. Still is, sometimes. Sensory overload.” He waved a hand vaguely through the air, musing, “You’ve already seen that, though. The day that Harry brought me back to your guys’ dorm to let me take a nap, that’s what was wrong. Just another overload.”

Something mildly alarmed crossed over Harley’s features. “I didn’t see anything but you passed out in Harry’s bed looking like a breathing corpse. That was from an overload?”

“I mean…” Peter wobbled a hand back and forth in a so-so manner. “I was exhausted, to be fair, because I was looking into the crime boss guys, and not getting enough sleep can sometimes lead to overloads, so it was, like… a combo hit, I guess. But Harry saw how I was in class. He told you, didn’t he?”

“A little bit, but not—not a lot of detail or anything.” Harley frowned, the crease between his brows growing deeper. He looked like he wanted to ask more, like he wanted to dig into every detail the way that he seems always keen to do, but instead he shook his head. “What about later? After you got used to your senses?”

Peter considered, thinking back on when he was fourteen and slowly but surely finding balance with his abilities. “It was… kind of fun,” he admitted. “At the start, no one knew who Spider-Man was, so I didn’t really have any enemies, you know? It was… it was exciting, realizing that I could do something to help people. I made my web fluid and web shooters, I stitched together a shitty suit, and I just went out there whenever I could and helped whoever I came across who needed help. The hardest part was keeping it from May and trying not to let my grades drop, honestly. And then Tony…”

Something pained settled over Harley’s features. “Tony,” he echoed with a nod. “Showed up, right? Out of the blue, no warning, was just—suddenly, he was there. Same for me.”

“He was eating May’s date loaf,” Peter said, almost absently, only to let out a laugh at the memory. “May couldn’t cook or bake for shit, though. He spit it out when we got to my room.”

The ends of Harley’s lips tugged again, only this time up, a barely-there sort of smile. Thoughtfully, Harley mused, “I wish he introduced us. I wish—I mean… I think it would have been cool. Knowing you back then.”

Peter tried to imagine it—him, not as weighed down by everything like he is now. Back when his nightmares consisted mainly of Toomes and collapsed warehouses and being tangled up in a parachute while sinking through the water of that lake. Tried to think of a younger Harley being mixed in—probably just through the phone since Harley lived in Tennessee, but the two of them becoming friends.

Harley getting to meet Ned and MJ through Peter, too.

That made Peter pause, trying to picture it. Ned and MJ and Harley. Maybe, somehow, meeting Harry and Gwen later in life still. All of them as a big conglomerated friend group. May still alive. Too good to be true. Or maybe everything would have still played out the way it did and he would have lost Harley to the spell, too. He tried to imagine a Harley who knew him before but doesn’t know him now and found that picturing himself, Peter Parker, at this point in time without Harley is… kind of impossible. It isn’t just him that has helped Peter get to this point, he knows—Harry and Gwen have been equally huge factors in Peter slowly but surely getting better—but Peter, as he is now, wouldn’t be here without Harley. That’s just a fact.

“I like knowing you now,” Peter decided to say, his heart feeling dense and heavy in his chest.)

aka chapter sixteen of homeward bound is coming along. not very quickly, but it’s happening.

[subskz]

lee know oral fixation?? what if i just phased out of existence? the thought is so painful…

him being a little brat until he’s got some fingers shoved into his mouth to keep him shut 💔 or maybe even catching him when he’s needy and letting him suck on your tits 😖

pink anon what have you done to my brain… how can i recover?? -🐾

as if the clip pink sent wasn’t already a critical hit…now this is gonna make my brain go haywire 😭

poor lino feeling so antsy when there’s nothing occupying his mouth…naturally his go-to method of letting you know that he needs smth is just being as insufferable as possible until you get the hint and indulge him. he can’t run his mouth anymore when it’s filled w ur fingers after all ♡ the way it would soothe him instantly once his pretty lips wrap around them…suddenly he’s the most docile lil angel for you

n for the sake of my sanity i don’t even want to think abt how content he’d look sucking on your chest, letting out cute lil hums as his eyes flutter shut and his ears burn red ❤️‍🩹

[tarot-by-e11e]

Hiii! Cocoon

TM

My fake scenario song : Feel it - Ayesha Erotica

I love grown ups 2

Fictional character??? Ummm…. I could maybe say Harley Quinn.

(reminder: this is for entertainment purposes only) Hi TM,

Thank you so much for participating in

my "COCOON" ask game.

I've watched Grown Ups 2, and it was really fun! I haven't listened to that song yet, but I'll definitely try it out! Yessss Harley Quinn is fun!!

(TW: I didn't expect the reading to be this much of a call-out. I got sick when I tried to sugarcoat, so I really was prevented to soften the message. If it doesn't resonate, leave it; Remember, I'm just the messenger.)

The cards I pulled for you are:

Justice, Ace of Swords, Knight of Wands

The first card asks for you to let go of this almost rigid toxic righteousness where if someone who irked/annoyed you even slightly, and they didn't get punished the way you wanted them to suffer, you get triggered/volatile. It's like for you, it's not fair that they didn't suffer the way you believed they deserved to suffer.

Also, I find it odd because if someone speaks up to you about your own toxic trait, you get aggressive and dismiss your responsibility to be accountability to your own darkness.

I really find this really odd that you tend to be critical and nitpicky towards other's mistakes but you get defensive the moment you are called to embody integrity and accountability.

With this card, you actually have to ask yourself: is being this biased about justice and fairness coming from a place of ego, worth losing people who are willing to meet you halfway to make things work with you? Or are you just finding faults to give you an excuse to leave?

(take a pause and let this sit for a bit)

Okay, you've calmed down now? Let's continue to the 2nd card.

So the next card is asking to let go of this insatiable need to always have new and fresh innovative ideas on the fly, but this feels more of like a work setting. It's like you're known in your work as the go-to person of always having new ideas on the fly effortlessly, when in fact, you work hard researching for new ideas even outside work schedule, as you have been so pressured to always be able to deliver.

Having this self-imposed unrealistic standard to always be productive and readily witty enough to deliver original ideas on spot has left you feeling overwhelmed, overburdened and underappreciated. It has been doing you more harm than good, don't you think so too?

There's nothing wrong with being prepared and wanting to be of service to those around you, but never at the expense of your sanity and well-being. If you want to keep being this reliable person, you need to create a sustainable self-care habit that keeps your safe, sane and well-rested. You can't expect to produce amazing results, when you're running on empty.

So the last card is asking you to find a way to deal with your short temper. I'm so sorry but I have to say it as it is, or else I'll get a headache for sugarcoating!! I heard you are encouraged to practice mindfulness and breathwork. Also to pause before you rage(?). I also heard, that the reason why you're a bit impatient is that you know you can do it better. Which is kudos on the Independent streak, but you need to also be aware that no everyone functions and thinks exactly like you. So imposing your own default as others' standards without clear communication is a spell for disaster.

So overall, I really tried to sugarcoat the reading because your guides are so strict about needing for me to say it straight, no filters. I wanted to add more softer messages but every time I tried, my gadgets and wi-fi goes haywire. So I'm so sorry if this reading became way harsher than I would usually do. You've participated in my previous games before, so you know I don't mean it to sound harsh. Also, feel free to not resonate it if it's too much, okay??

Channeled song for you is:

9th random shuffle from my dice throw

Last Intuitive Message to end this reading:

This song feels fitting for the reading but also feels odd because it's like you're currently stuck on something/someone(?). Could be the reason why you needed to let go of the ff. stated above in the reading. Ahhhhhh, okay, now the whole reading makes so much sense. You were hurt by someone, but it doesn't seem recent; more so a repeat offender. Why did I hear, "almost but not quite, yet hurts like a mthfkr"? You know this person ain't good for you, so why allow yourself to be caught up by someone that doesn't deserve you?

OMG it makes so much sense why I wasn't allowed to sugarcoat?!?! It's because your guides told you that you're so stubborn about this situation and you needed a no BS no frills call-out!?

So it seems that the reading above had been the consequence/aftermath of allowing yourself to be treated less than we both know you deserve.

Well my dear, you're an adult now. You know what's right and wrong for you. You also know what you deserve and shouldn't tolerate.

All I can do is wish you well and hopefully on 2025, you finally and unapologetically choose yourself no matter what~

Thank you for taking the time to participate in my new ask game.

Feel free to head back into my ask inbox to send your feedback.

If you want an in-depth extended version of your reading, please head into my Paid Readings and purchase a reading with me.

Want to show me a bit of appreciation other than your feedback, I accept tips in my Buy-Me-A-Coffee link.

[spellbcok]

𝐇𝐖𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓𝟏𝟓 : plot call ( for my sanity i'll make a separate post related to starters ). i won't be dropping any on-going threads, nor will i begin anything new or post any non-headcanon memes until after the event. but feel free to do so on your end. hit the heart and i'll message you for event related plots. under the cut are basic ideas of where my muses minds are at and whether or not they will be involved in any way.

for all muses: i'm up for any or all of my muses getting injured or injuring others (purposefully or not).

anya jenkins: self-preservation will kick in almost immediately. they will be hiding or seeking out someone she has gotten close to who are more fit for combat. most likely, though, they'll be trying to find a way to get the hell out of dodge as it's very much their mo.

ji euntak: she will be out there, jumping in front of swords (metaphorical or literal) aimed at friends, family, strangers. basically willing to save anyone, the self-sacrificial type that she is.

lorelai gilmore: being an extremely privileged upper middle class woman whose biggest hardship was being a single, teen mom (which, granted, was difficult), this will be her first experience with such violence outside of watching it. but mama bear instincts will kick in and she'll be doing whatever it takes to search for/protect rory.

lydia martin: her banshee abilities are really going to go haywire. she'll be drawing strange pictures, finding dead bodies, and maybe have her first scream / wail ? outside of trying to deal with that, she is also part of the fbi so she'll be working out who the killer(s) is/are. definitely would love for her to find bodies as it's kind of her thing, but obviously would not be something we'd know at this very moment. soo feel free to just say 'if my muse dies lydia can find them' and if it happens then i'll include it in her threads and what have you.

nam onjo: she's pretty unfazed by everything and just trying to get through each day. anyone sus will be tased and/or pepper sprayed first and asked questions later. ** new addition: she sees an opportunity to make a quite a bit of money by basically being a errand person for those in hiding. so hit her up on the taskrabbit-esque app if you need some takeout delivered or more alcohol or whatever. there's an injury/death tax so it'll be pricey but at least your muse won't have to take the risk themselves!

sabrina spellman: another self-sacrificial one, but she's going to actively fight people who mess with her loved ones as well as try to figure out who the culprit(s) are. she's been practicing her magic so she'll use that for defense. and, just like riding a bike, she might spout out some more powerful and dangerous spells that could cause injury.

tatia: no stranger to death and chaos, tatia knows how to protect herself. she'll likely stay in her studio or apartment and avoid everything. maybe she'll go to some trusted people/friends because safety in numbers and all. but she is definitely not going out of her way to help anyone or solve anything.

tinker bell: tink is still learning how to use a cellphone and now she has to avoid murderers? how annoying. the fairy is not about that and will fly away from threats. possibly goad and be a little brat about it tbh. she's also learned a bit about capitalism and the whole supply and demand thing, so she'd be willing to sell a bit of pixie dust so your muse can also fly (limited, so far 1/3 taken).

**** new muses

brenda bates: she is enjoying the chaos but feigning disgust and sympathy for the victims. she is likely having a house party or attending one because she's from the 90s and that is what they do in the face of a crazy serial killer being on the loose.

one specific plot idea i have for 1 unlucky muse is for her to injure them while in her hooded mask (image). with all the chaos, her crime will just get lost in the sea of others. however, her crimes emulate urban legends so i can give you a small list or if you have one in mind feel free to send it to me.

chloe decker: she will be investigating. she is not only trying to figure out who the culprit(s) is/are but why this was happening. she's from la so she is familiar with serial murders and strange happenings. but these sudden bursts scream otherworldly doing. she would know since she has spent time with the devil, a demon, and an angel.

[dysfunkt1on]

Baked

And not in a good way, I mean the bread was tasty and I can't handle weed but this bread was pretty good. What I do mean though is that my nervous system was a train wreck today but I did manage to clean up my room enough so far. All of my clothes I couldn't care less about since it's all mens clothing that due to my situation I have no choice but to wear. I have no way to comfortably wear women's clothing and feel normal but I was able to get away with a women's jacket and some cute hats which I feel far more comfortable in despite my exhausting, nausea inducing boxy pants/shorts. Trapped in a family situation where being outed entirely to them specifically even though I'm out everywhere could be the end if it goes bad enough and my sick ass won't be able to survive out there. I have a gift card I could use for a clothing shop but what is the use when I can't even get anything I'm comfortable in and don't feel disgustingly awkward wearing? Being misgendered everywhere with only the occasional correct pronouns is really starting to rub up against my sanity. I don't even respond to sir or anything and I drop a million hints but people remain comically oblivious. The dysphoria about my head shape and hair type that doesn't even grown down is maddening enough, I have no choice when I go out but to cover the top of my head since physically I look like a gender based science experiment and people tend to have worse reactions to me if my whole head is exposed because the ugly gender uncanny valley effect seems to make even the most kind soul hate you for existing never mind my facial hair I can't safely get on permanently removing right now for various reasons.

I also put away my amp on my shelf as I've given up with my harsh noise project since I have such severe EMF sensitivity that I can't use it without getting deathly ill. All I have left is my writing project really and whatever hobby stuff I can do online on my radiation shielded computer that is also stuck in the stone age that I can't overburden either because the CPU radiation can also make me extremely ill. All of this combined with the above makes me feel like I'm locked out of human society altogether. I went to the store before as I got a drive and lost who I was with in the store and due to my nervous system going haywire today it was the most disorienting experience I had all week. People everywhere, could barely navigate around them all, brain too slow to process everything going on around me, but eventually I found them up front and was able to use them as some kind of anchor in what was going on around me so I didn't need to feel like some paper getting whipped around in the wind. I got some dough to make my own bread with and it was pretty good even though I shouldn't have made anything. The rest of the day I spent largely sitting around on tumblr and pacing around in discomfort. Later I gained back some ability to enjoy more music so I put that on for a while before I got the bread in the oven. Still listening right now to some random noise cassette I found on soulseek after briefly watching some of White Centipede Noise's podcast on Mallard Theory . Before this I was listening to some band called Pro-Death's album from 2010 that Jay from Circuit Wound was in. Not sure how I went down that trail of discogs bread crumbs tonight but it wasn't too bad. I sold an extra copy of that one on Rural Isolation Project from Circuit Wound to the record shop and it seems no one bought it yet. Wasn't my favorite and I though the other official CD release A Sudden Lapse in Concentration on Oxen was a lot better, they go way back though with cdr's and cassette releases that are all generally a noisy good time.

I have all day off tomorrow too and hopefully I do a bit better but I don't expect to be doing very much. Maybe I'll find some excuse to get driven to a cool store just to get out for a while since I really don't feel like doing anything else. I do have a gift card to a movie theater I might be able to use. I have no idea what is playing but if it looks remotely interesting that'll be fine to do later. Lately out the only thing besides making trips to the store I've been doing out is making excuses to go out for coffee and scratch off's which I really want to stop blowing money on out of the sheer boredom of living in this place and get back to building my noise CD collection at least. There isn't really even any shows on around anymore anywhere besides one with Killswitch headlining and Frozen Soul that I kinda wanna see and some other show with Static X and Dope at another venue but a bigger one. It won't be sit down though but it is at the one where they got noise complaints before so they probably all pussied out on the volume levels which every big venue show I been to in the past couple years has done ruining the show. The last show that blew my mind (and brains out) was whatever the shows name was with Aborted, Crown Magnetar, Sanguisoogabog, Dying Fetus, Suicide Silence, and Born of Osiris. I felt like I got hit by a bus and someone put my brain in a blender the next few days but see that was actually worth it while I get only slightly less fucked up at the underwhelming huge venue shows for less of a show and twice the money. If I'm going to get death by sound induced PEM it better destroy me. I swear the only band you could make out the songs from were was Suicide Silence because they have such painfully sharp sound live. Born of Osiris even just sounded like a wall of noise and Dying Fetus beat me to death with their amps.

[tallmantall]

James Donaldson on Mental Health - Getting anxious over Anxiety Depression?

A lot of people who are exerting too much of their brain power usually exhaust not only their physical strength when engaging in various multi-tasking activities, they also tend to over extend their brains up to the point when it plainly needs some good old time for relaxation. A lot of busy people who seem to cannot fathom the idea of relaxing and taking time of from work, as well as their worries, tend to actually start having nervous breakdowns, anxiety depression and all sorts of mental illnesses that can cause a person's sanity to go haywire, fortunately, if you're one of those poor unfortunate ones who are unable to distress and is constantly worried and fussing over things, there are actually available cures and various treatments for treating anxiety depression. Anxiety depression is actually characterized by all sorts of irregularities and erratic behavior from the person who is suffering from it, this is usually due to certain stress triggers that may tend to easily cause a person undue jitters and stress. Also, a lot of people who tend to get easily nervous over stressful activities are actually prone to having anxiety depression, its just a matter of being strong-willed when it comes to facing difficult and stress-prone activities. It may be pretty hard to overcome at first, but trying to be calm and cool in times of extreme pressure is what'll actually save your mental health from going totally downward spiral. When it comes to effectively curing one's self from a mental illness, one must keep in mind that you have to be actually honest with yourself and assess what kind of depression or mental illness you actually have, go to reputable psychiatrist to get yourself diagnosed correctly as well as be able to get the right depression treatment for yourself. Here are the various types of depression: Manic or Bipolar depression - characterized by sudden and extreme changes in one's mood wherein one minute he or she is in an elevated state of euphoria while the next minute (day or week) he or she is feeling to be in a personal hell. Postpartum depression - characterized by a prolonged sadness and a feeling of emptiness by a new mother wherein physical stress during child birth, an uncertain sense of responsibility towards the new born baby can be just some of the possible factors why some new mother go through this. Dysthimia - characterized by a slight similarity with depression, although this time, it's been proven to be a lot less severe, but of course with any case, should be treated immediately. Cyclothemia - characterized by a slight similarity with Manic or Bipolar depression wherein the individual suffering from this mental illness may occasionally suffer from severe changes in one's moods. Seasonal Affective Disorder - characterized by falling in a rut only during specific seasons (i.e. Winter, Spring, Summer or Fall) studies however, prove that more people actually fall in to a rut more during the Winter and Fall seasons and lastly, Mood swings, wherein a person's mood may shift from happy to sad to angry in just a short time.  #James Donaldson notes:Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticleFind out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundationwebsite www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy www.celebratingyourgiftoflife.com Link for 40 Habits Signupbit.ly/40HabitsofMentalHealth If you'd like to follow and receive my daily blog in to your inbox, just click on it with Follow It. Here's the link https://follow.it/james-donaldson-s-standing-above-the-crowd-s-blog-a-view-from-above-on-things-that-make-the-world-go-round?action=followPub But the type of depression that has actually been proven to be quite common among people is anxiety depression, which is actually characterized by the state of being overly anxious about things. Anxiety, a supposedly normal behavior that'll actually help a person adjust more to a certain stressful activity like first date jitters or a grueling exam the following day. Anxiety actually helps you get psyched up towards facing certain "difficult situations"; anxiety therefore is actually a good thing. Anxiety depression however, is simply the opposite, not to be easily dismissed as a "case of the nerves"; Anxiety depression is in actuality an illness that can be caused from the biological makeup of an individual, or in other words, a hereditary illness. Also, there are actually various types of Anxiety depression, each having its own unique characteristics. Take for example Generalized Anxiety Disorder or GAD, this kind of Anxiety depression is a lot more complicated than the average Anxiety depression, in spite of possibly being a day-to-day habit for those who suffer this kind of Anxiety depression, Generalized Anxiety Disorder actually makes the individual quite more paranoid than usual, anxiety attacks are more frequent, even absurd at times. They can even be anxious even when there's no apparent reason that calls for them to behave in such a way. People suffering from Generalized Anxiety Disorder actually shows a lot of symptoms, from lack of sleep, to being unable to relax, getting tired easily, cannot concentrate on what they're doing and even suffering from depression.  This kind of Anxiety depression is still curable; just a little work will actually do the trick. Consult a reputable cognitive behavior therapist who'll help give the individual the therapy that he or she needs to help him or her loosen up, also prescribed medicines are sort of a must to help these individuals battle anxiety attacks, help them calm down and relax. Read the full article

[ofpensandpapersblog]

GOING OFFLINE

I know I don’t owe anyone an explanation, but here it is anyway.

For the past few days, I’ve been completely detached from social media (FB Meta, specifically) since I was sick, and my anxiety got triggered, among many other things.

Today, I logged onto my account to get some files and I got the chance to scroll through some posts… then I felt a pang and I can feel my mind going haywire again.

That’s when I realized that I deactivated (and went into isolation) to keep my sanity.

Those who are very close to me know that I’m experiencing some personal issues, especially with my mental health. (Side note: I am not diagnosed and not seeing a professional, yet.) I’m dealing with my 'demons', resurfaced traumas, and other stuff; reconciling with my emotions and letting myself feel instead of overanalyzing and blaming myself in the end. The strong façade cannot cope anymore.

Maybe because I’m so used to life’s hustle and bustle that it felt like I needed to always be in a rush; to put myself even in the tiniest, peculiar space I know I cannot fit; to not rest, or feel, or be human at all.

Being online became unhealthy for me either. My mind got filled with negatives—it made me compare myself to others and feel bad for not being included even when there’s a big ‘you cannot sit with us’ sign hiding in plain sight.

Going offline made me realize that I needed to step back to protect my peace and safeguard my mental health. I needed to focus on myself and my own journey without feeling left behind or being filled with what ifs.

I know social media is just one aspect to consider, and there are more to the story that meets the eye, but I believe I’m going through this to be able to rest and heal from the things that hurt me and caused me pain and to be able to feel alive again with the help of God’s grace and mercy—ONE STEP AT A TIME.

No, I’m not going to remove myself completely from the digital scene but yes, you will see less of me. If there’s really a need, there are tons of ways you can contact me.

Again, I don’t need to explain myself to anyone but if you happen to read this, please try to understand.

In all these, I still praise the Lord for the gift of life.

PS. BIG SHOUTOUT TO MY CONSTANTS!!! I'm always grateful to the Lord for having you guys in my life. Thank you for being there for me and for going through the storms with me. I love you guys!

[sizzlingtigerglitter]

Perseverance: The Duct Tape of Dreams – How to Stick it Out Until You Win 

Ah, perseverance. That glorious word that sounds so inspiring in commencement speeches and motivational posters, yet feels suspiciously like chewing gravel when you're stuck in a creative rut or staring down a seemingly insurmountable to-do list.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for chasing your dreams with the ferocity of a squirrel after a particularly plump acorn. But let's be honest, the path to success is rarely paved with rose petals and unicorn sprinkles. More often, it's a pothole-ridden highway decorated with flat tires, existential dread, and the occasional rogue banana peel.

So, how do we persevere when the going gets, well, not-so-good? How do we channel our inner Rocky Balboa and punch through life's metaphorical Adrian? Fear not, weary dreamers, for I come bearing gifts: the comedically absurd yet surprisingly practical guide to sticking it out like nobody's business. better focus and concentration

Step 1: Embrace the Inner MacGyver (Because Duct Tape Fixes Everything, Right?)

Imagine your goal as a magnificent spaceship destined for the glittering nebula of achievement. You've got the blueprints, the engine humming, and enough ambition to fuel a SpaceX launch. But then, BAM! Reality throws a cosmic wrench in your plans. The engine sputters, the navigation system goes haywire, and you're left floating in the void, feeling about as useful as a chocolate teapot in a space vacuum.

This, my friends, is where the MacGyver in you steps in. Duct tape (figuratively, of course, unless you're actually building a spaceship in your garage – no judgment) becomes your weapon of choice. You use creativity, resourcefulness, and a healthy dose of self-deprecating humor to patch up the leaks, reroute the circuits, and keep your dream spaceship (or career, or relationship, or whatever your metaphorical vehicle may be) hurtling towards its destination.

Remember, sometimes the most ingenious solutions come from the most ridiculous places. So, channel your inner inventor, embrace the absurd, and don't be afraid to get a little (or a lot) goofy in the pursuit of your goals. After all, who says saving the world (or at least your sanity) can't be hilarious?

Step 2: Befriend the Phoenix Within (Rise from the Ashes, Baby!)

Life has a knack for throwing metaphorical flamingos at your face just when you think you've got things under control. A project flops, a relationship fizzles, and suddenly you're curled up in the fetal position, convinced you've peaked at "unemployed couch potato."

But here's the thing: setbacks are like spicy wings – they burn going down, but they leave you wanting more (of success, not wings, unless you're really into that sort of thing). They're opportunities to learn, to adapt, and to rise from the ashes like a magnificent, slightly singed phoenix.

So, next time you face a flaming flamingo (or metaphor of your choice), don't wallow in the ashes. Dust yourself off, channel your inner Beyoncé, and strut your way out of the metaphorical fire. Remember, every setback is just a push-up for your soul, making you stronger, wiser, and even more fabulous in the process.

Step 3: Weaponize Self-Deprecating Humor (Laugh in the Face of Failure, Then Punch it in the Nose)

Let's face it, sometimes the only way to deal with the absurdity of life is to laugh at it. And what better target for your comedic barbs than your own glorious failures? Self-deprecating humor is the ultimate underdog superpower. It disarms negativity, diffuses tension, and reminds you (and everyone else) that you're not taking yourself too seriously.

So, go ahead, crack jokes about your failed soufflé, your disastrous haircut, or your inability to parallel park without hitting a mailbox. Own your imperfections, laugh at your stumbles, and let the world know you're okay with not being perfect. After all, who wants to hang out with someone who takes themselves too seriously anyway? Plus, a good laugh is a great stress reliever, which can give you the mental boost you need to keep pushing forward.

Step 4: Remember, You're Not Alone in the Circus of Dreams (We're All Clowns, Just in Different Costumes)

The road to success is a crowded highway, filled with fellow dreamers juggling flaming chainsaws, riding unicycles on tightropes

[inafarfarawayland]

We meet again in this high roads of mine

Let’s open up some wounds. Mama passing was the biggest downfall I see in your entire life as 31.

I saw you crying, it hurts & how I wish i can take your pains away but I know I can’t. There I was standing, giving all my supports from far. I wish i can hug you & say it’s okay to cry yourself out. I won’t say be strong, time will heal. Who says it will heal? We just move forward with a big hole that we will carry for the rest of our lives. It will always be the the missing piece that you’re longing for

I try to keep my sanity for the past 1 week. Keep myself busy whole week long. It sounded selfish of me but oh God, how I miss you a lot. I couldn’t do anything

Then this week, it felt like a bomb was dropped again.

You said you will be away to accompany her, for 1 week, again. I know I shouldn’t said that word.

I should’ve know where I stand kan?

It’s when you ‘mistakenly’ updated her instead of me, I went haywire again. It triggers my short temper. 2 weeks before this, you did the same thing.

You tell me how to be patience when I can’t even functioning straight up. Do I have to mirror you? Do we go back to where it’s all started? Do you will come to me when you’re in need of it?

[furiaae]

Asteria resembled a fish gasping for air as every synapse in her brain seemed to be going haywire all at once. Cloud's whines and pants were so close to her ear, his breathing against her skin, everything felt like his entire being was just aching to be within her own very being in a literal sense.

She could feel his own pulse racing with how close he had her pulled up against his body, like trying to mesh them together to become wholly one. Asteria felt herself squirm, could hear the pitiful whimpers rise from her own throat without her even realizing the sounds were coming out until they did.

To her, it was the most taboo feeling to have him like this and yet at the same time it felt entirely right to have him seemingly at her mercy. He could very well be doing this to lower her guard, to make it easier to make her powerless and deliver her right to Sephiroth. Yet maybe it was the way she couldn't extract a hint of true malice from the other's soul that made Asteria weaken further in Cloud's hold.

"What...What could you possibly need my help with..?" She whispered as she attempted to keep hold of the last dregs of her sanity and with it, the last dregs of her stubbornness.

@hiislegacy

"... He won't. Not if you have my protection." Cloud continued to pepper her with light kisses, holding her close to his form. He whispered between breaths, needing her like the oxygen in the air. "Sorry about that, but I promise to make it up to you. Please, please..." He practically whined with warm and heavy pants on her skin, acting on his instincts, allowing them to take over any of his more logical thoughts and reasoning.

After all, it is what Sephiroth would have wanted him to do, and to be like. Free of all restraint, or the binds that kept him down. So he listened to his body, and it's needs. It was almost like a calling in the back of his soul, beckoning for him to never let go. "I want you so bad, Eri... Won't you help me?" He wasn't sure why this feeling was so strong, but he wasn't going to ignore it.

@furiaae