#my posts are getting progressively longer with each one i write

[qwertyprophecy]

Mortholme Post-Mortem

The Dark Queen of Mortholme has been out for two weeks, and I've just been given an excellent excuse to write some more about its creation by a lenghty anonymous ask.

Under the cut, hindsight on the year spent making Mortholme and answers to questions about game dev, grouped under the following topics:

Time spent on development Programming Obstacles Godot Animation Pixel art Environment assets Writing Completion Release

Regarding time spent on development

Nope, I’ve got no idea anymore how long I spent on Mortholme. It took a year but during that time I worked on like two other games and whatever else. And although I started with the art, I worked on all parts simultaneously to avoid getting bored. This is what I can say:

Art took a ridiculous amount of time, but that was by choice (or compulsion, one might say). I get very excitable and particular about it. At most I was making about one or two Hero animations in a day (for a total of 8 + upgraded versions), but anything involving the Queen took multiple times longer. When I made the excecutive decision that her final form was going to have a bazillion tentacles I gave up on scheduling altogether.

Coding went quickly at the start when I was knocking out a feature after another, until it became the ultimate slow-burn hurdle at the end. Testing, bugfixing, and playing Jenga with increasingly unwieldy code kept oozing from one week to the next. For months, probably? My memory’s shot but I have a mark on my calendar on the 18th of August that says “Mortholme done”. Must’ve been some optimistic deadline before the ooze.

Writing happened in extremely productive week-long bursts followed by nothing but nitpicky editing while I focused on other stuff. Winner in the “changed most often” category, for sure.

Sound was straightforward, after finishing a new set of animations I spent a day or two to record and edit SFX for them. Music I originally scheduled two weeks for, but hubris and desire for more variants bumped it to like a month.

Regarding programming

The Hero AI is certainly the part that I spent most of my coding time on. The basic way the guaranteed dodging works is that all the Queen’s attacks send a signal to the Hero, who calculates a “danger zone” based on the type of attack and the Queen’s location. Then, if the Hero is able to dodge that particular attack (a probability based on how much it's been used & story progression), they run a function to dodge it.

Each attack has its own algorithm that produces the best safe target position to go to based on the Hero’s current position (and other necessary actions like jumping). Those algorithms needed a whole lot of testing to code counters for all the scenarios that might trip the Hero up.

The easiest or at least most fun parts for me to code are the extra bells and whistles that aren’t critical but add flair. Like in the Hero’s case, the little touches that make them seem more human: a reaction speed delay that increases over time, random motions and overcompensation that decrease as they gain focus, late-game Hero taking prioritising aggressive positiniong, a “wait for last second” function that lets the Hero calculate how long it’ll take them to move to safety and use the information to squeeze an extra attack in…

The hardest attack was the magic circle, as it introduced a problem in my code so far. The second flare can overlap with other attacks, meaning the Hero had to keep track of two danger zones at once. For a brief time I wanted to create a whole new system that would constantly update a map of all current danger zones—that would allow for any number of overlapping attacks, which would be really cool! Unfortunately it didn’t gel with my existing code, and I couldn’t figure out its multitudes of problems since, well…

Regarding obstacles

Thing is, I’m hot garbage as a programmer. My game dev’s all self-taught nonsense. So after a week of failing to get this cool system to work, I scrapped it and instead made a spaghetti code monstrosity that made magic circle run on a separate danger zone, and decided I’d make no more overlapping attacks. That’s easy; I just had to buffer the timing of the animation locks so that the Hero would always have time to move away. (I still wanted to keep the magic circle, since it’s fun for the player to try and trick the Hero with it.)

There’s my least pretty yet practical solo dev advice: if you get stuck because you can’t do something, you can certainly try to learn how to do it, but occasionally the only way to finish a project within a decade to work around those parts and let them be a bit crap.

I’m happy to use design trickery, writing and art to cover for my coding skills. Like, despite the anonymous asker’s description, the Hero’s dodging is actually far from perfect. I knew there was no way it was ever going to be, which is why I wrote special dialogue to account for a player finding an exploit that breaks the intended gameplay. (And indeed, when the game was launched, someone immediately found it!)

Regarding Godot

It’s lovely! I switched from Unity years ago and it’s so much simpler and more considerate of 2D games. The way its node system emphasises modularity has improved my coding a lot.

New users should be aware that a lot of tutorials and advice you find online may be for Godot 3. If something doesn’t work, search for what the Godot 4 equivalent is.

Regarding animation

I’m a professional animator, so my list of tips and techniques is a tad long… I’ll just give a few resource recommendations: read up on the classic 12 principles of animation (or the The Illusion of Life, if you’d like the whole book) and test each out for yourself. Not every animation needs all of these principles, but basically every time you’ll be looking at an animation and wondering how to make it better, the answer will be in paying attention to one or more of them.

Game animation is its own beast, and different genres have their own needs. I’d recommend studying animations that do what you’d like to do, frame by frame. If you’re unsure of how exactly to analyse animation for its techniques, youtube channel New Frame Plus shows an excellent example.

Oh, and film yourself some references! The Queen demanded so much pretend mace swinging that it broke my hoover.

Regarding pixel art

The pixel art style was picked for two reasons: 1. to evoke a retro game feel to emphasise the meta nature of the narrative, and 2. because it’s faster and more forgiving to animate in than any of my other options.

At the very start I was into the idea of doing a painterly style—Hollow Knight was my first soulslike—but quickly realised that I’d either have to spend hundreds of hours animating the characters, or design them in a simplistic way that I deemed too cutesy for this particular game. (Hollow Knight style, one day I’d love to emulate you…)

I don’t use a dedicated program, just Photoshop for everything like a chump. Pixel art doesn’t need anything fancy, although I’m sure specialist programs will keep it nice and simple.

Pixel art’s funny; its limitations make it dependent on symbolism, shortcuts and viewer interpretation. You could search for some tutorials on basic principles (like avoiding “jaggies” or the importance of contrast), but ultimately you’ll simply want to get a start in it to find your own confidence in it. I began dabbling years ago by asking for character requests on Tumblr and doodling them in pixels in whatever way I could think of.

Regarding environment assets

The Queen’s throne room consists of two main sprites—one background and one separate bit of the door for the Hero disappear behind—and then about fifty more for the lighting setup. There’s six different candle animations, there’s lines on the floor that need to go on top of character reflections, all the candle circles and lit objects are separated so that the candles can be extinguished asynchronously; and then there’s purple phase 2 versions of all of the above.

This is all rather dumb. There’s simpler ways in Godot to do 2D lighting with shaders and a built-in system (I use those too), but I wanted control over the exact colours so I just drew everything in Photoshop the way I wanted it. Still, it highlights how mostly you only need a single background asset and separated foreground objects; except if you need animated objects or stuff that needs to change while the game’s running, you’ll get a whole bunch more.

I wholeheartedly applaud having a go at making your own game art, even if you don’t have any art background! The potential for cohesion in all aspects of design—art, game, narrative, sound—is at the heart of why video games are such an exciting medium!

Regarding writing

Finding the voices of the Queen and the Hero was the quick part of the process. They figured that out they are almost as soon as writing started. I’d been mulling this game over in my mind for so long, I had already a specific idea in mind of what the two of them stood for, conceptually and thematically. When they started bantering, I felt like all I really had to do was to guide it along the storyline, and then polish.

What ended up taking so long was that there was too much for them to say for how short the game needed to be to not feel overstretched. Since I’d decided to go with two dialogue options on my linear story, it at least gave me twice the amount of dialogue that I got to write, but it wasn’t enough!

The first large-scale rewrite was me going over the first draft and squeezing in more interesting things for the Queen and the Hero to discuss, more branching paths and booleans. There was this whole thing where the player’s their dialogue choices over multiple conversations would lead them to about four alternate interpretations of why the Queen is the way she is. This was around the time I happened to finally play Disco Elysium, so of course I also decided to also add a ton of microreactivity (ie. small changes in dialogue that acknowledge earlier player choices) to cram in even more alternate dialogue. I spent ages tinkering with the exact nuances till I was real proud of it.

Right until the playtesters of this convoluted contraption found the story to be unclear and confusing. For some reason. So for my final rewrite, I picked out my favourite bits and cut everything else. With the extra branching gone, there was more room to improve the pacing so the core of the story could breathe. The microreactivity got to stay, at least!

A sample of old dialogue from the overcomplicated version:

Regarding completion

The question was “what kept me going to actually finish the game, since that is a point many games never even get to meet?” and it’s a great one because I forgot that’s a thing. Difficulties finishing projects, that is—I used to think it was hard, but not for many years. Maybe I’ve completed so many small-scale games already that it hardly seems that unreasonable of an expectation? (Game jams. You should do game jams.)

I honestly never had any doubt I was going to finish Mortholme. When I started in late autumn last year, I was honestly expecting the concept to be too clunky to properly function; but I wished to indulge in silliness and make it exist anyways. That vision would’ve been easy to finish, a month or two of low stakes messing around, no biggie. (Like a game jam!)

Those months ran out quickly as I had too much fun making the art to stop. It must’ve been around the time I made this recording that it occurred to me that even if the game was going to be clunky, it could still genuinely work on the back of good enough storytelling technique—not just writing, but also the animation and the Hero’s evolving behaviour during the gameplay segments which I’d been worried about. The reaction to my early blogging was also heartening. Other people could also imagine how this narrative could be interesting!

A few weeks after that I started planning out the narrative beats I wanted the dialogue to reach, and came to the conclusion that I really, really wanted it to work. Other people had to see this shit, I thought. There’s got to be freaks out there who’d love to experience this tragedy, and I’m eager to deliver.

That’s why I was fine with the project’s timeline stretching out. If attention to detail and artistry was going to make this weird little story actually come to life, then great, because that’s exactly the part of development I love doing most. Projects taking longer than expected can be frustrating, but accepting that as a common part of game dev is what allows confidence in eventual their completion regardless.

Regarding release

Dear anonymous’s questions didn’t involve post-release concerns, but it seems fitting to wrap up the post-mortem by talking about the two things about Mortholme's launch that were firsts for me, and thus I was unprepared for.

1. This was the first action game I've coded. Well, sort of—I consider Mortholme to be a story first and foremost, with gameplay so purposefully obnoxious it benefits from not being thought of as a “normal” game. Still, the action elements are there. For someone who usually sticks to making puzzle games since they’re easier to code, this was my most mechanically fragile game yet. So despite all my attempts at playtesting and failsafes, it had a whole bunch of bugs on release.

Game-breaking bugs, really obvious bugs, weird and confusing bugs. It took me over a week to fix all that was reported (and I’m only hoping they indeed are fully fixed). That feels slow; I should’ve expected it was going to break so I could’ve been faster to respond. Ah well, next time I know what I’ll be booking my post-release week for.

2. This was my first game that I let players give me money for. Sure, it’s pay-what-you-want, but for someone as allergic to business decisions as I am, it was a big step. I guess I was worried of being shown that nobody would consider my art worth financial compensation. Well, uh, that fear has gone out of the window now. I’m blown away by how kind and generous the players of Mortholme have been with their donations.

I can’t imagine it's likely to earn a living wage from pouring hundreds of hours into pay-what-you-want passion projects, but the support has me heartened to seek out a future where I could make these weird stories and a living both.

Those were the unexpected parts. The part I must admit I was expecting—but still infinitely grateful for—was that Mortholme did in fact reach them freaks who’d find it interesting. The responses, comments, analyses, fan works (there’s fic and art!! the dream!!), inspiration, and questions (like the ones prompting me to write this post-mortem) people have shared with me thanks to Mortholme… They’ve all truly been what I was hoping for back when I first gave myself emotions thinking about a mean megalomaniac and stubborn dipshit.

Thank you for reading, thank you for playing, and thank you for being around.

[skribbyposts]

Zosan haircut time!!!!

had to write this after getting the idea from my last post lmao. I love the idea of Sanji being like "ugh you look fucking terrible" and then forcing Zoro to take care of himself. they're so stupid and gay and in love omg. beginning part is mostly Zoro and Nami but that's ok because they're wlw/mlm solidarity always!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

More than anything, Zoro loves sunbathing on the Sunny's deck. Something about the warm light makes him want to melt into the wood. However, Zoro finds it very hard to enjoy the sun when it is boiling outside, and he swears he can hear his sweat sizzle when it meets the wooden flooring.

"We're going through a summer climate, just wait it out." Nami sips on her martini, laid out on a lounge chair and taking cover under an umbrella.

"Easy for you to say, you witch. You stole all the shade." While Nami's basking in the shadow of her parasol, Zoro's sprawled out on deck, sweating his fucking balls off. His whole body is damp, and he's stripped down into just a pair of loose shorts to cool off.

"Go hang out with your boyfriend in the kitchen," She says.

"He's not my boyfriend. I fucking hate you."

"The feeling's mutual, you sweaty loser."

Zoro groans, peeling himself off of the floor to sit up and comb his fingers through his shaggy hair. It's too long to stay out of the way, and it's uncomfortably wet where it sticks to his forehead. Zoro would tie it back, but it's too short for that. In short, he is suffering.

"I'm gonna die from heatstroke because of you," Zoro shakes the excess moisture from his hands.

Nami scoffs. "Stop whining, hop in the sea or something."

Zoro briefly considers this, but decides that's more effort than it's worth and tries to take a nap instead.

Zoro hears someone stroll out of the galley, and cracks his eye open to see Sanji balancing a tray of smoothies in one hand with a beach towel in the other. He's dressed down, an open Hawaiian shirt and blue shorts replacing his usual suit.

"Hello, my darling, Nami-san! I've just prepared smoothies. Would you like one?"

"Yes, Sanji-- thank you so much," She says smugly, while looking directly at Zoro. "You're a saint, You know that?"

He watches the cook hand Nami a drink from the tray, and Sanji's eyes follow her gaze to the floor where he's lying. "Oh my god, marimo. you look like -excuse my language, Nami-san- a fucking caveman."

"What are you talking about?" Zoro would pick a fight, but it's way too hot to bother.

The blonde cringes. "Your hair looks like someone ate it and then spat it back out onto your head."

"Okay, well, fuck you too then!" God, everyone's out for him today. What has Zoro ever done to deserve this?

"Ugh. Stand up, you dunce." Sanji nudges Zoro's head with a sandaled foot. "You need a haircut."

"I can give myself a haircut." Zoro nods in the direction of his swords, trying to move as little as possible.

"Are you insa- no! I'm cutting your hair, properly. Now get up."

"I don't wanna."

"I swear to god," Sanji sighs. "My dearest Nami, do you mind holding this for a bit?"

Nami peers at the two of them through her oversized sunglasses, a knowing smirk on her face as she takes the tray from Sanji's hands. "No problem."

Zoro doesn't have time to get a word in before Sanji reaches for his ear and bodily drags him all the way to the bathroom.

----- "I don't understand how you let it get this bad," The blonde lectures.

Zoro grumbles as he slouches on a stool in front of the bathroom sink, glaring at his own reflection. Sanji was partially right with his comment earlier - Zoro's hair is a damp, scraggly mess on top of his head right now. From where he is, Zoro can see the cook as he lines up all his fancy hair-cutting stuff, whispering insults under his breath. He looks kind of...domestic, out of his suit. It's the one thing Zoro appreciates whenever the Sunny passes through climates like this. "Okay, I'm going to attempt to fix this mess, and you are going to stay still," Sanji asserts as he slides into place behind Zoro. "as in, do not move."

"I know what 'stay still' means."

"Surprising. I thought you only spoke in grunts."

They both fall silent, Sanji draping a towel over Zoro's shoulders and clicking a button on the clippers in his hand. Gentle fingers push Zoro's head forward to access the strands at the nape of his neck. The whirring of the machinery and Sanji's hums every now and then are the only sounds in the cramped bathroom, and Zoro almost falls asleep to the feeling of the blond's hands in his hair.

"Hey." Sanji delivers two sharp taps to the back of Zoro's head. "Stop slouching, you're making it uneven."

"I'm so hot."

"I'm sure you are, you meathead. sit up."

Zoro begrudgingly straightens his back, getting a better view of the cook's freckled face reflected in the mirror. He always gets freckles when it's sunny out. They look like little constellations, scattered across his cheeks like that. Zoro wants to touch them so badly.

A few minutes pass, and Sanji moves to the front of his hair, taking a black comb from the counter to parse through the mess draping over Zoro's forehead. His face is scrunched in concentration, a crease between his eyebrows visible as he snips away with a pair of silver scissors. Zoro just...watches, staring intently into the other man's eyes. He's not sure if he's delirious from the heat, but is the cook's face turning red?

Sanji pauses his ministrations to frown at him. "Stop fucking looking at me. It's creepy."

"Sorry, sir." That earns him a snort and another smack to the side of his head. Zoro closes his eye (reluctantly. very reluctantly).

It feels like forever before Sanji finishes up his hair, ruffling it slightly before commanding Zoro to open his eyes.

The haircut is cropped close to his neck in the back, his overgrown sideburns shaped to follow his hairline. His hair is still a bit long on top, but it doesn't fall over his face.

Zoro's reflection looks better; neat, almost. He actually really likes it.

"It's okay, I guess." Zoro's lying through his teeth. It's fantastic, anything Sanji ever does is fantastic.

Sanji looks at him through the mirror. "Hm. Handsome little marimo." He nods in self-approval before packing up all his stuff, whisking the towel from around Zoro's shoulders to take to the laundry room.

Zoro sits there, bewildered, watching the other man maneuver around the tiny space unbothered- what?

He turns to look at Sanji as the blonde saunters out of the bathroom, definitely already busying himself with something else.

When Zoro turns back to his reflection, he doesn't fight the tiny smile that crosses his face. Sanji thinks he's Handsome.

The smile's gone just as quick as it came, replaced with a scowl as he hears a female voice giggling through the wall to his right.

"Nami, I'm going to murder you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nami was eavesdropping the entire time lmfao.

Nami, to Zoro: wow so handsome!! such a handsome wittle marimo arent you so wittle?? ooga booga doo!!!

Zoro: i am not above killing lesbians. Anyway BRAND NEW HC that Sanji gets freckles when he's in the sun he's such a cutie patootie i love him.

Pre-slash Zosan domesticity fuels my soul <33333

ALSOO!!! opening up asks cuz im running out of ideas :P if you ask me for something I'll probably write it thanks

[jjunieworld]

#WIP ⟢ THE SALT UNDER THE SEA ˒˒ 심재윤 ⨾ 박종성 ▸  part two of the player’s game series⌇playlist & series tag

the death of your grandma has you returning back to your mother’s seaside hometown—the same town you left jake in a year ago—for good. now that you’re back, so are the feelings you really desperately wished to leave behind. it doesn’t help that now you’re caught in the crossfire of two guys with a rough past who want to be with you.

pairing ‎⸝⸝⸝ sim jaeyun x reader, park jongseong x reader 𓄵 iηcℓudᥱs 𓈓 cousin jungwon, bestfriend!jay, player!sunghoon, and oc hana (jake’s ex)

genre﹙📓﹚⸝⸝⸝ exes to lovers, bestfriends to ???, angst, smut, fluff, lifeguard!jake, ex player!jake, bestfriend!jay, lifeguard!jay, lifeguarding inaccuracies, love triangle, slice of life, some h2o references, beach au, summer romance

warnings ‎⸝⸝⸝ if you didn’t like reader in the first part then you won’t like her in this one, reader’s grandma passing and mentions of reader’s dad passing, multiple unprotected sex scenes, soft dom!jake, mean dom!jay, toxicity, jayke constantly one-uping each other, arguing, semi-public sex, size training, corruption kink full smut tags in actual post . . . !

kipo’s note ‎⸝⸝⸝ this was a long time coming lmao i’m so so sorry to everyone who has been waiting (���‸◟；) with my month long break and adjusting to writing again i’m finally ready to start working on this series again! this is my main priority so i will try to get it out as soon as i possibly can!! this post will be updated as i work on it! ^^ all feedback and asks on suggestions are welcome! ♡

release date ⸝⸝⸝ sept 20th, 2024 ⋆ progress updates here!

∿ [ teaser wc: 0.7k ] ∿ [ current wc: 26.1k ] ⋆ [ continue to . . . wips , masterlist ]

send an ask or reply to this post if you want to be tagged when finished! minors and ageless/blank blogs will not be tagged. please have a visible age. my permanent taglist will already be tagged!

⟢ READ HERE!

your heart beat fast as you looked out the plane window to your mother’s seaside hometown—your new home. there was no need for your mom to nudge you awake since you weren’t able to sleep for the entirety you were on the plane, the nerves were eating at you.

you never thought you’d be back here, never thought that you’d ever say goodbye to your own hometown—which was also your late father’s—but here you were.

when your mom told you that you’d be moving here permanently you didn’t know how to feel. one one hand, you understood your mom’s decision. it was just you and her out there miles away from your family and everything must’ve reminded her of your father. it reminded you of him too. on the other hand, you desperately wished she would change her mind.

it was enough seeing that one glimpse of jake nine months ago, but to see him over and over and over again? you didn’t think you could take it. he still texted you, even more now since, and you still haven’t answered. things between the two of you still remain unsaid.

but you also couldn’t help but count down the seconds until you laid your eyes on him again. it set your skin alight and you couldn’t help the small smile on your face and the giddiness you felt. was it selfish, yes, but after everything you think you’re finally ready to face him again.

to give your relationship another chance. to give him your heart again and not be fearful that he would break it, that he’d keep it guarded and safe. after all, he said he would wait for you.

and if he didn’t protect your heart, you’d pull back and it would be as if you never had anything to do with him again.

“y/n? are you listening?” you heard your mother’s voice call out. you snapped back to reality, blinking a couple of times to get your wits.

you were no longer on the plane. now you were lugging suitcases into your aunt’s house. your aunt was delighted to hear that you and your mom would be moving here. there was plenty of room in the house until the two of you got your own place.

“mhm,” you mumbled, though you definitely weren’t listening.

your mom sat the suitcase she was carrying in front of you and grabbed your shoulders. “is it that boy from last summer?” what was his name? jacob?”

“jake,” jungwon answered for you as he walked out the front door to grab more boxes.

your mom snapped her fingers. “jake! that’s it. listen, i know you had some problems moving here because of him, but use this as a way to put yourself out there more than last summer! there’s more wonderful people here than just jake.” she gave you a sympathetic smile and continued carrying stuff inside while you remained planted to the same spot in the driveway.

it wasn’t “just jake” that worried you. it was all of his friends and hana. you didn’t want another summer full of drama, especially if you and jake did start dating again.

getting all your boxes and suitcases into the house went quick and relatively easy. you decided on unpacking all of your things later, right now your mind was too clouded.

jake’s letter sat carefully in your anxious hands. you must’ve read it a million times over now and still you could barely wrap your head around it.

“two people who are meant to be will always find a way back to each other. and we are meant to be. no matter how long it takes, i’ll wait for you.”

it was now or never. you grabbed your phone and opened your messages up to your conversation with jake. his last message was from this morning, hoping that you had a good day today. he must not know that you’re back and for good. with a shaky sigh, you let your fingers move across the keyboard.

you: meet me at our spot.

⟢ READ HERE!

taglist 1﹙ OPEN! ﹚⸝⸝⸝ click here for series taglist! 🏷️ @jjunberry @gothgyuu @gyuuberries @beargyuuzz @kittyhyuka @dani-is-tired @riaawr @yeonjunsfox @nxzz-skz @rapmonie2047 @soobieboobiedoobiedaboobie @aaa-sia @jeonghaniehaee @todorokiskitten @onlyhyunjin @un06 @nenesz @branchrkive @dreamiestay @lilyuwon @ghstzzn @kaykay11sworld @kirinaa08 @cherlv @zl-world @cloud-lyy @sunpov @samouryed @immelissaaa @y4wnjunz @who-tf-soddhi @minaateez @jajenoric @lilactangerine @chaconadine @americanojake @in-somnias-world @bobaikeu @cupidscourt @inkigayocamman @nctsshoes2 @helenngxz @jakeswifez @usnve @tasnim10 @deobitifull @won4me @zeeloveshee

send an ask or reply to this post if you want to be tagged when finished! minors and ageless/blank blogs will not be tagged. please have a visible age. my permanent taglist will already be tagged!

∿ [ continue on to . . . masterlist , wips , taglist ] all feedback and asks on suggestions are welcome! ♡

© jjunieworld - all rights reserved. please do not repost on any social media sites, translate, or modify any of my works.

[headspace-hotel]

current progress in theories of ecological succession!!!!!! This paper lists 19 different ecological succession theories and their perspectives and limitations

Before I knew its name, I knew succession....I still remember the exact moment of realizing the endless flow of change moving through the ecosystem around me. Looking at weeds, shrubby woods, gardens, and fields, I was seeing this unfolding and expanding web of trajectories and possibilities, and it was like peering into the secrets of the universe.

And ever since I've paid attention to it. Constantly observing the movement in ecosystems and its patterns.

All of these theories are partially correct but incomplete. How could we ever come up with a complete theory of succession? It's like studying the convergence of order and chaos itself. Some of the important tensions of succession brought up in this paper are:

Does the environment determine which plants survive, or do the plants that survive determine the environment? (both)

Does the plant community before disturbance determine post-disturbance regeneration, or does dispersal of new plants determine it? (both)

Are communities at different successional stages formed by whatever random assemblage of plants happens to exist at that stage, or are plant communities adapted to form certain stages of succession? (both)

Is succession a process of maturity of one big thing, or cycles of death and life of a bunch of smaller things? (both)

Do plants exclude other plants from niches as succession progresses or do they open up new niches? (both)

Is succession cyclical or linear? (both)

and like ok. this topic will get me sounding like some kind of deeply unscientific weirdo because I will be like Yes, The Weeds Taught Me The Secrets of Order and Chaos. but also this is a topic in science where all the literature written for non-layperson specialist audience makes Sense.

I was really excited reading this paper because this is like, the stuff I think about randomly all the time. like the other day I just basically blacked out and wrote like 2000 words about The Nature of Disturbance and Temporal and Spatial Dimensions of Ecosystem Change not even thinking about how I was writing about succession, and almost made my brain blow up.

like each successional theory developed so far has highlighted part of the big picture but there are several pieces of the puzzle that have barely been articulated yet. my questions:

Disturbance: What Does It Mean. When talking about something alive and changing, there is no stable state of being, so what does it mean to "disturb" an ecosystem? Every ecosystem is maintained by disturbance, like in an old-growth forest animals will graze and trample and trees will occasionally die and fall and there will be storms and fires and that is part of what a forest is. So like...where is the line between a disturbance that maintains an ecosystem at "climax," and a disturbance that makes the ecosystem no longer "climax."

disturbance, even the most severe and devastating disturbance with near 100% mortality of all plants, does not fully erase the previous plant community. so like, early-successional communities aren't a blank slate, but there is a such thing as an "early-successional community" in the sense that weed species not visible in the pre-disturbance community will pop up. Now, a lot of the theories assume that long-distance seed dispersal (and the availability of seed sources and dispersers) influences the arrival of weeds, but I think the soil seed bank is just as important if not MORE important. Do all soil seed banks have plenty of weeds? Do they have different weeds or the same weeds? Do those weeds match what was there the last time there was a weed community on that site?

disturbance is usually distributed over the land SUPER unevenly except in cases of lawns, logging and industrialized farming. at what spatial scale do edge effects irretrievably muddle the concept of discrete early-successional or late-successional communities. Like if you go into the forest and bulldoze a patch of forest down to bare dirt, that patch is fundamentally different from the bare dirt in a huge housing development, just because of being directly adjacent to a forest. Even completely disregarding seed dispersal- it's shaded, it is affected by the leaf litter and fine woody debris, etc.

I would tentatively state that linear processes of change occur in most man-made environments that are disturbed cyclically, for example, lawns- intensively managed monoculture lawns seem to persist in a lush state for a short time before the grass starts to die. most tilled agricultural fields are losing topsoil and fertility in a linear fashion. so like, the land has an accumulative legacy of tens or hundreds of disturbance cycles. Isn't this likely to be true on a much larger temporal scale? Like, is a forest ecosystem now affected by the fact that it was a prairie 1,500 years ago?

likewise, might this accumulative legacy be necessary for certain ecosystems to reach a "climax" state? e.g. prairie will overgrow into woodland in a few decades absent any disturbance, but cyclic disturbance by fire allows the cumulative progression of a larger successional process

[astonmartingf]

THIS IS NOT OUT OF THE BLUE ; YT22

yuki tsunoda x gasly!reader . . . in big brother fashion, pierre wants you to go on a date with yuki to convince him to move closer to milan. however, yuki already lives in milan, and pierre is still not putting the pieces together

amgf see this is what yuki brainrot gets you, i love this omg one of my best works yet, i might come back to this type of format because i am not writing pt2s anymore!!!!!! (lovingly ofc) just like always, enjoy 👍 @viennakarma it's done 🫡

yourusername

liked by pierregasly, francisca.cgomes, and 12 others

yourusername i get why my brother likes him so much now. he's a fucking child! feels like another day spent with pierre.

view comments...

francisca.cgomes awww they're bonding look pierregasly

pierregasly you had me in the first half, wym a child he's older than you

yourusername doesn't seem like it, seeing how you act, understandable

charles_leclerc oh chérie, what is your brother up to?

yourusername he's up to no good as usual, but if he's constantly yapping to you then you must know what he's up to

charles_leclerc i'm more surprised that you agreed to this?

yourusername he threatened to throw me back to university for a master's degree this time FFS

charles_leclerc well, if it's a master's degree or a date... understandable

yourusername control him please, i can't be the victim of his antics no more

pierregasly he said he had fun!!!

pierregasly now go on another date with him 🫣

yourusername ???? what is actually wrong with you

pierregasly you're acting like you didn't have fun, you even posted it for the whole family to see

yourusername get off my back pierre, my account my rules

pierregasly yeah you constantly yapping to your 20 followers which half are our family members

yourusername i'm blocking you next

pierregasly try me bitch

yourusername oh i will, you are no longer welcome in my account, get out

yourusername uploaded a new story

[he's taking me somewhere... i hope i come out alive 😀]

pierregasly replied to your story

oh my gosh, is this progress?

apparently he's in milan, and now we're on the coast so... i guess

wym he's in milan?

he's here?

he's with me atm but yeah

i saw him earlier and he asked if i was free

did he say ask about me?

sorry pierre 😐

non no, it's fine

i'm a bit sad he didn't contact me but i'm glad you're together

francisca.cgomes replied to your story

a boat date 🥰

it's not a date...

we're just hanging out

uh huh... cool

that's it?

wym?

that's it? you're just letting me off the hook like that? no teasing about being yuki's future lover or smth?

you want me to tease you about it?

non, not really i was just thinking about it

you're thinking about being yuki's future lover?

shut up kika, you know i didn't mean it that way

yeah yeah, sure 😏

you're absolutely telling this to pierre huh?

you know, i'm on your side for this one

your secret's safe with me 😉

what secret?

oh yn, for someone older than me you're a bit out of it but it's okay you'll get it one day 😊

get what?

kika?

what are you talking about?

yukitsunoda511 replied to your story

wow, you don't trust me one bit

i thought we had something going on

yeah right, shut up yuki

am i your boyfriend?

🥺🥹😭

yes

good girl 😊

yourusername uploaded a new story

[it's him again... annoying asf]

yukitsunoda0511 replied to your story

why would you lie to your audience like that?

because it's way more fun this way

duh???

everyday i'm reminded that you are pierre's sister when you pull shit like this

excuse me?

are you calling my soft launching methods shit 😕

i'm just kidding

you totally aren't

you're right, i am not

it's just i didn't think he'd be that dense about it

i'm sure i told him we were dating

he's forgetful like that

don't start talking, you didn't even tell him about us

i did!

uh huh....

well, it's funny to me because look, he's so desperately trying to get us together because we're so perfect for each other (ikr) and if he would've just listened like a year ago he would've known about us already

i mean, even alex knows what's up and she's seen us like twice already

alex has seen us a couple of times, even kika but pierre...

he'll figure it out, it's like he's been waiting so long for us to date, i don't know when he'll realize it

let's pray for him

praying for pierre 🙏

yourusername

liked by yukitsunoda0511, charles_leclerc, and 13 others

yourusername road trip with 💋 + we met alex on her field trip, it's a win 😊

view comments...

alexandrasaintmleux it's nice to see you two ❤️ have fun on your road trip

yourusername ahhhh thank you, we'll see you soonest 😠

charles_leclerc come visit us next time ^^

pierregasly are you in monaco? hello? who is that person 🤨 where are you going? you said to update me? where are my updates?

yourusername i told you where we're going dumbass, check your messages be for fucking real

pierregasly oh you did send me updates

yourusername 🙄

pierregasly OWAH? YUKI IN THE LIKES? liked by yukitsunoda0511!!!!! we're winning today

yourusername what is actually wrong with you?

yourusername

liked by pierregasly, yukitsunoda0511, and 22 others

yourusername milan. my man.

view comments...

pierregasly can't believe i'm finding out through an instagram post and not IRL, fake sister 👎

yourusername is it our fault if you didn't listen?

pierregasly i was already shipping you in my head with yuki, i thought of it first

yourusername okay and? doesn't change the fact that we've been mentioning it for a long time already

yukitsunoda0511 i mean yn is right, i did tell you as well

pierregasly okay everyone is ganging up on pierre for not knowing blah blah blah

francisca.cgomes i mean babe, you are the only one who didn't catch up

alexandrasaintmleux it was clear as daylight, they're not only dating but they're clearly fucking you're so dumb in your own delusions to see

pierregasly okay wow, i'm going to ignore the last few texts but first it was my sister, next my teammate, then my girlfriend, next my friend's girlfriend okay charles i know you're with me here buddy defend me please 🙏

charles_leclerc do you want me to add more salt to the wound? because i agree with all of them...

yourusername see? this didn't just happen out of nowhere, it was already happening and you were just too invested to see the truth

yukitsunoda0511 i look good there, next time i'm posting 😊

yourusername noooo i want to gatekeep you 😠 no no non

yukitsunoda0511 okay, whatever you say goes 🫡

yukitsunoda0511 can i soft launch?

yourusername yes 🥰

[tojisun]

https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cygo_5wOuCi/?igshid=bGRjYzdrZWF2N3Q5

another biker!simon x reader <3

NO OK SO THIS IS ADORABLE, FUCKIN BEAUTIFUL EVEN, BUT HIS CAPTION??? “everything’s better with her 🥰” THATS SO PRECIOUS MY GODDD MY HEART

and absolutely thats so biker!simon x reader coded!!

i love love writing reader getting over her fear of riding a bike and this one!! this video seems like something simon would take as a commemorative video for when she’s confident enough to even put her hands up AAAAHHHHHHH // somewhat sequel of this

simon’s pleasantly surprised, if he’s being honest.

the ride is smooth, the roads empty as the night swelled. the two of you have long parted with the squad, bidding each other goodbyes as simon took a left turn onto the exit.

he feels your hands swipe along his middle, untangling their hold from each other to find purchase on his hips instead. simon’s heart throbs, pride thrumming underneath his veins at feeling you gain confidence not only in him but even in yourself.

riding a bike is a challenge, that he knows too well. he knows how much effort it took for you to even accept his invitation, feeling you tremble with the strain of trying to suppress your fears when you climbed up behind him and held on tightly. he’s always emphasized that you are the one calling the shots – that no matter where and no matter when, if you needed to stop simon will.

so seeing you gradually fall in love with the ride the way he is, your anxiousness bleeding away to be replaced with excitement, had made him so proud. because it had been a beautiful progress, one that simon cherished as he helped you throughout.

and he’s told you this multiple times, pressing kisses on the top of your head or on the slope of your shoulders, his hands greedy as they hold you.

“look at how far you’ve gotten,” he says, pleased hums rumbling from the base of his throat.

you giggle, twisting in his arms so you can climb up to his lap. “thank you for bein’ patient.”

you wrap your arms around his neck, blinking down at him, and simon watches as your hair falls to frame your face. his lungs constrict, going breathless as he gazes up at you, wondering what did he ever do to deserve an angel like you?

you’re so beautiful. and he can’t believe how you’re all his.

simon breathes in sharply when he feels your hands leave his hips and, for a moment, panic seizes him whole. cold dread washes over him, making the pleasant thrum of the summer wind turn into something colder. something with a bite.

it’s only when he uses his mirrors that his heart eases up, his ears no longer ringing. because what he sees, instead, makes his lips wobble – your hands are up in the air, spread open as you feel the pooling air.

he picks up the sound of your laughter, your giddiness too bright to be drowned out by the sound of the wind. simon feels his muscles loosen up, the coiling panic finally evaporating.

he wants to commemorate this moment. wants to have a physical reminder of this day.

he taps your thigh twice as a warning that he’ll make a stop and rumbles in elation when he feels your arms around him again. he swerves just outside of the road and parks.

“si?” you ask, confusion ringing in your tone.

simon fumbles for his recorder, turning it on, and replies, “wanna take a video of us, sweetheart?”

he feels your hands flutter where you’re holding him before hearing your happy gasp of, “yes!”

/

simon posts the video on his account later with your permission, your head resting on his shoulder as you watch him type out a caption.

“aww,” you coo when you see what it is that he wrote. simon chucks his phone to the side when he gets the notification that it’s finally been posted and picks you up from your spot to place you on his lap, because now it’s his turn to be clingy and handsy.

you huff a fond laughter as you settle on top of him, snuggling close and nuzzling your face on the juncture between his neck and his shoulder. your eyes flutter close when simon begins to pepper kisses on the top of your head, a happy sigh leaving your lips.

“love you, sweetheart,” simon whispers.

you press your smile on his skin. “love you too, baby.”

(the video becomes simon’s most liked post as of date.)

xx - biker!simon’s account

GOD IT TURNED MUSHY AGAIN FORGIVE ME I CANT STOP MAKING SIMON SO IN LOVE

[andy-wm]

i'm wondering how your thesis of "idols will come out when they want" fits into your insane shadow analysis attempting to prove jimin and jungkook fucked in the middle of their travel show (amongst other things)? like do you get joy out or trying to drag someone out of a closet they might not be in? or is it something else? just curious! 😀

Hey wdcmaxy

Since you have the guts to use your name I'll respond :)

So, you read my thesis?

*Sips whisky*

Cool. And you read my insane shadow analysis too?

Hmmm... do you come here often?

Let me answer your question then.

I think we both know the shadows analysis isn't really insane - it's based on very basic earth science. Shadows grow longer as the day progresses because of the rotation of the earth on its axis. You sound reasonably literate so i assume you know this already.

I guess your description of my shadow analysis ( I think I'll name my next racehorse 'Shadow Analysis') as insane is an attempt to discredit the idea that a fair bit of time passed while Tae was out of the house? But that was kinda silly on your part. Even children know that shadows change as the day passes.

Nothing insane about it.

He was gone for hours, no debate.

Now let's move on to the fucking part, and when and how idols choose to come out.

This is actually worth discussing.

As flattered as i am that you think my tiny insignificant blog could be a game changer for anyone, let's be real.

How many people, besides yourself, do you think read my blog?

Serious question.

I'm estimating maybe 100. Double that on a good day. Maybe 300 if i write something REALLY profound which doesn't happen often.

I am way less excited about my impact on the world than you are, because I'm a realist.

BUT if by some strange twist of fate my blog came to the attention of someone whose opinion mattered (I'm not counting you, don't worry) do you think they would take it seriously? Do you REALLY imagine a random tumblr post about shadows could make someone believe that an idol was gay if they didn't already believe it?

Here's a great example of how that wouldn't happen:

You, dear reader.

You're my example.

You came here to tell me I'm speaking shit and that I should pull my head in, correct? My insane shadow analysis hasn't changed your beliefs at all. You're here, throwing a tantrum on my page, because you don't agree with what I'm saying, not because you suddenly believe it.

Or ...

Perhaps you suspect it's true and that scares you. Maybe you can't be absolutely sure I'm wrong and that's why you need to yell at me? Could that be it? Time for a bit of self reflection?

Either way, it's not going to make an iota of difference in the grand scheme of things.

We are all just dust motes floating through time and space, my friend. You dont need to worry so much. The universe is unfolding exactly as intended.

However... There are a couple of things we should agree on:

The fact is that the shadows grew long and therefore, time passed. And Tae was out for several hours. Maybe he went out for a bit of afternoon delight himself? Maybe Jimin and Jungkook played Pokemon Go all afternoon, or prayed, or practiced their English, or braided each other's hair.

Regardless of whether they did or didn't fuck, or how many times, or on what surfaces, the time still passed.

And whether I write my blog or not, people will believe what they believe. And they will be gay or they won't be gay.

And even though I never mentioned anything about them fucking in that post, whether you like it or not Jimin and Jungkook might be fucking right now, as you read this.

One last thing...

Please bear in mind, through all of this, that fucking is not the be all and end all of life. Sure its a lot of fun if you do it right but the notion that it's more meaningful than sharing your innermost thoughts and feelings, or giving someone your time and energy, is bullshit.

You can have a roots-deep love for someone and never even think of fucking them. Or you can meet someone in a public toilet and have at it, and leave without even knowing their name.

Sex does not equal love. Fucking is not that big of a big deal.

Unless...

Unless you're fucking someone the patriarchy doesn't want you to fuck. Then its a major issue.

Hear me out.

The need to control who we fuck is based a patriarchal need to control material wealth.

To control material wealth, the patriarchy needs to control reproduction (so they can be sure their wealth stays with their bloodline, because wealth is built over many generations) and to do THAT they need to control womens' bodies.... and to do that, of course they need to control who women fuck. And who men fuck too!

Do you know what the ACTUAL issue is with men who like dick? They don't automatically buy into the patriarchal way of life. (where's the solidarity, lads?)

Why don't they?

Because lifelong monogamy and marriage and nuclear families don't matter as much when you're not equating love with sex, and sex with reproduction. When your goal isn't to accumulate wealth and pass it down to your children.

Same thing applies to women who love women. They aren't focused on being demure and pleasing the men in power. They aren't focused on making themselves wife material. They will challenge the status quo and maybe even (shock! horror!) decide not to have children. How the heck do you make sure your money and power stays in the family, how do you build an empire, when the women are perfectly happy having sex with each other and don't want to love, honour and obey??

And whose fault is all this?

Its got to be the damned queers, right? They're making people think there might be other ways to share your life with those you care about! That's why its important to squash down gayness whenever you can, right, wdcmaxy?

Look at them destroying the fabric of society!

If Jimin and Jungkook ARE fucking every chance they get, good for them. I hope they're balls deep and breathless, hitting all those sweet spots for each other having a really good time.

And if they're not fucking, it actually doesn't matter to me because the way they support each other and share their hearts is beautiful. (I do think they are fucking though)

Truthfully, whatever they're doing, as long as they're happy I'm happy.

Can you say the same, wdcmaxy?

Peace.

[inuyashaluver]

Queen! Ur writing is always so perfect 💋 would u consider writing something for Mearps?

tiktok exposure - mary earps

mary earps x reader

description: in which your secret girlfriend exposes your relationship on her tiktok

warnings: reader gets slapped with a tortilla - funniest warning i’ve ever written in my life, little swearing, unhinged but so am i

a/n: omg, lovely, you’re so sweet! thank you for the kindness and the request, hope you enjoy ❤️

⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆

you and your girlfriend, mary were in a relatively ‘secret’ relationship. your friends, family and teammates all knew about it, the only people really left in the dark was the media.

there wasn’t any specific reason for it, you and mary just thought it would be better this way in the beginning stages of your relationship. but the thing is, you’ve been dating for over 5 years and people still think that you and mary are just affectionate best friends. slowly but surely, you both didn’t want to hide it any longer.

—

you met mary in the england youth teams. originally, she didn’t like you at first. you were a forward and she was a keeper, and even though you were on the same team, her body would burn in anger when the ball you sent to the back of the net would graze her fingertips everytime.

you were always labelled a sweetheart, one of the nicest girls on the team by a long shot and no one could deny it, not even mary.

she always claimed she didn’t like you but as the time progressed, she began to admire you. mistaking her ‘dislike’ for intrigue.

to ‘settle your differences’, you and mary were forced to room together at every camp, meaning the two of you would talk and goof off together. it was clear to your teammates that you both liked each other, so with a gentle push, mary made the first move and asked you out. and ever since then, you’d been inseparable.

—

you and mary ended up playing together at all the same clubs, labelling the two of you as the unstoppable best friends, something that the two of you would laugh about.

—

it was the women’s world cup, you and mary getting called up for the senior team at the same time in your shared flat. it was nerve wracking, yet exciting, as everyone had good feelings about the tournament.

during this time, your girlfriend had grown quite a love for frequently posting on tiktok, making random videos with your teammates everyday. occasionally she would vlog and get you to say “hi” the comments always saying how cute your friendship was.

“hello, everyone! millie and mary here,” mary holds the phone while she sits on the plane next to millie, you’re sitting behind her. “we’re gonna play around with this guess the country filter while everyone is sleeping” mary says in a lame attempt of a whisper while her and millie cackle.

millie glances around the plane until her eyes fall on your sleeping figure. “literally everyone is sleeping right now, look at your girl over here” millie gestures to you and mary’s face lights up, she lifts up her phone to show you sleeping next to maya, both of you bundled up in hoodies. though what mary didn’t realise, was that you were wearing her hoodie.

“sleepy girls” mary coos before laughing and propping the phone up so they could continue the video.

“what’s that?” millie asks

“jaw, teeth? mail teeth?” mary says in full confusion

you woke up to the loud laughs of mary and millie with a groan, you peer over the front of your seat to see the two of them goofing off on mary’s phone. you’re visible in the camera, your tired eyes evident on your face.

you slap them both on the back of the head and they both let out a gasp in surprise, snapping their heads to see a very grumpy you staring down at them.

“too loud” you grit out and mary smiles up at you affectionately, moving her hand to pinch your cheek gently. “sorry, love” she laughs, millie blows you a kiss in apology and you couldn’t help but smile. before you sit down, you wave at the camera, “it’s india” you say simply before sitting back down, hearing the excited yells of astonishment at your correct answer.

the video blows up, specifically the comments saying how funny you all were. there were some comments saying how you were wearing mary’s clothes and some saying the way mary looked at you was anything but friendly but fans were quickly shutting them down.

everyone truly believed the two of you were best friends but the video began to decay those opinions. the speculations were growing and you and mary honestly found it quite funny.

—

you and mary room together, forcing you to film as many videos as she could with you. her tiktok page filling up completely with random videos during the day or challenges she would do with different teammates.

the social media admin was also having a field day with all the content being released from mary, they’d also been releasing their own. one that sparked a lot of interest in particular, was one of you and mary arriving to a game.

she’d gotten off the bus first and waved to the camera, grabbing your hand and helping you walk down the stairs. when you reach the ground, you look up at her and smile affectionately before she bends down slightly, showing you her back.

you instantly take the invitation and she piggybacks you while you wave to the camera.

“i only arrive in style” you joke at the camera, throwing it a wink as you rest your cheek against mary’s. “what about me?” mary mocks, you just smile and nuzzle into her.

in the distance, ella is speaking to alessia, “i wish my partner was here so i didn’t have to walk” she jokes, it’s barely audible but fans picked it up right away. at this point, you and mary didn’t really care, you were just being you and having fun and that’s all that mattered for the both of you.

—

though, a video that fully confirmed your relationship was made by mary. she’d begged you to join her on a challenge and claimed it would be extremely funny.

“baby, please, it’ll be so good!” she pleads, hugging you from behind while you brush your teeth. “can’t you ask me later?” you muffle out, mouth full of toothpaste and she laughs affectionately. kissing your cheek repeatedly as she squeezed your waist gently. she stares at you in the mirror and you give in easily, “fine” you groan, finishing up brushing your teeth as she squeals excitedly.

you had training today, both of you agreed to film the video at the training facility as it involved water.

she’d clearly already organised this, when she walked you in the room, the entire team was there and had brought all the materials.

you laugh in disbelief as your water bottle and tortillas are thrusted in your hands. “what are we doing again?” you smile at mary while she gives the phone to another tiktok expert, esme to film. “so we fill our mouths with water and then do scissors, paper, rock and then whoever wins slaps the other person with the tortilla” mary explains, all the girls are in fits of giggles excited to see the video happen right in front of them.

you shake your head amusingly but agree, laughing when mary gives you your tortilla. she does a quick intro with her arm slung around your shoulder. “hello everyone, me and this hottie over here have a great video for you today, enjoy!” she says cheekily, you roll your eyes at the pet name and ignore the teasing coming from behind the phone.

you fill your mouth up with water and try not to laugh at mary’s appearance, she was clearly trying to make you laugh and it took everything in you to hold it in. you send her a warning glare before holding your hands up for scissors, paper, rock.

you win the first one and gently slap mary’s cheek with the tortilla, clearly missing the challenge. people awe at you from behind the camera and you look at them confused, mary swallows her water and laughs. “you’re so cute, (y/n/n)!” millie yells and you try not to laugh at her.

“you need to slap hard!” mary exclaims, your eyes widen but you nod, gesturing for her to continue. you win again and look at mary trying not to laugh. you slap a little harder but still quite gentle and mary smiles at you, swallowing her water and pulling you into a little hug.

“i’ve picked the wrong person to do this with” she coos, you swallow your water and laugh when she cradles your head to her chest. “you’ve gotta slap me really hard with it, love, don’t hold back!” mary smiles at you before separating again.

you get back into position and do scissors, paper, rock again, this time mary wins and you look at her nervously. she smirks and lines the tortilla up next to your face. you let out a little squeal in fear as she pretends to slap you but doesn’t. the team laughs brightly at the interaction, some of them a little scared for your cheek.

mary finally slaps you with the tortilla and your eyes widen in shock and you spit out a little water in the process. the slap was hard, so hard that she broke the tortilla in the process. people let out shocked gasps and laughs as they watch you recover. you were trying not to spit out your water from laughter but failing completely, you keep laughing with little spits of water coming out of your mouth while you hold your cheek.

mary looks at you in shock, swallowing the water and cradling your face between her hands. “baby! oh my god, i’m so sorry” she looks into your eyes and smiles when she sees you laughing.

“shit, mearps, the gym is working out for you” you joke, she kisses your slapped cheek repeatedly as an apology and you can feel yourself growing warm. “i’m so sorry, my love” mary says earnestly, you kiss her cheek back and tell her not to worry about it.

you walk up to the camera with a big grin, showing them your cheek with a laugh. “confirmed, mary earps is a tortilla abuser, slapped her own girlfriend” you joke, mary laughs brightly from behind you, “oi!” she hoists you over her shoulder and you let out a gleeful laugh, she playfully slaps your behind and runs off. esme stops the camera and the girls watch it back together, pissing themselves laughing at it.

mary takes you to a hidden corner of the room and pulls you into a loving kiss, it lasts for a couple seconds before she pulls back and inspects your cheek. “i’m so sorry, baby, i overestimated the strength of the tortilla” she laughs, “it’s okay, babe, now i can say mary earps slapped me with a tortilla, big achievement” you shrug, she smirks and closes the gap, kissing you again quickly before walking towards the girls again.

—

the video blows up, becoming one of the most popular world cup videos as well as the confirmation of your relationship. everyone claims “they knew it” on the video and sending the two of you support. now that everyone knows, mary will make couple tiktoks with you and feeds everyone in the woso community their favourite couple content.

⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆

you know the drill!!! - just pretend it’s you xx ily chlo

liked by mayaletissier and 44,232 others

1maryearps: when she confirms the relationship 🫦

view all comments

yourname: mary earps slapped her own girlfriend with a tortilla

↳ 1maryearps: i said i was sorry!

↳ yourname: YOU. SLAPPED. YOUR. GIRLFRIEND. WITH. A. TORTILLA

↳ 1maryearps: I’M. SORRY.

↳ yourname: you’re lucky you’re cute

↳ mbrighty04: you’re the cutest (y/n/n)!

↳ yourname: no you mills!!

↳ 1maryearps: i’m sorry, am i missing something here?

↳ mbrighty04: mind your business

[aliamor]

Hii!! I ABSOLUTELY LOOOVEEE YOUR CASE HCS 😌🩷🩷 I was wondering if you could write a Case x y/n who's also a pretty popular twitch streamer who is literally the definition of chaos?? Like their audiences are very similar and case and reader would play games together a bunch (like minecraft or phasmo) and their chats ABSOLUTELYYY SHIP THE TWO, like in Case's media there would be edits of them together or yt vids saying like "PROOF Y/N AND CASEOH ARE DATING 😱😱😱" and the two of them deny it but its also really obvious that they're either dating, or into each other I would be very grateful for this 😔🙏🤲

I GOTT YOUU, THANK YOU MLLLLLLL🙏🙏🩷

You and case have been dating for about 3 years now, the first two years were private from the media because you genuinely wanted to get to know eachother and build a good relationship. Both of your guys chats know you guys are dating but have an inside joke that ‘yall like each other’ so case and you will do streams and watch “PROOF Y/N AND CASEOH ARE DATING” and show a ton of clips of yall flirting, and being sweet to eachother.

“Nah chat, thats my homie” case jokes out as he gets done watching the video, but hes smiling ear to ear as he giggles.

“Guys nah, thats a good friend of mine, whatchu meannnn?” Youll joke out to your chat as your blushing as i laugh out.

So the joke of yall dating and proof of it continues, and its honestly funny because one of the videos shows a picture of you two, you are on his lap and kissing him that you posted that on your instagram. “i got hacked that day and obviously it’s photoshopped like come on…” Youll laugh out as you form lies.

In caseoh discord he will have a whole section that says ‘proof‼️’ and the chat is filled with videos and pictures of yall together. And of course case foundals on into the section when hes live.

Just like his ‘debunking scary videos’ he will ‘debunk’ the proof of yall dating and make up lies on the spot.

In the end the act was blown when you walked into his room well he was streaming and to get his attention you said “baby” or some pet name. Chat acted all surprised and clipped it, soon it was in the ‘proof‼️’ section of his discord.

Mwah,

How are you lovelys? Im not bad, but y’all progress on my braces; i no longer have braces on all my three back molars… SHIT HURT AND MY WHOLE JAW IS HURTING. They had shave the glue off which was a big fat 🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️. 1/10 experience. But in three week i have to and get the rest off so pray for yuh girl🙏 anyway, stay safe mlss.

Me when my teeth got shaved to get rid of the glue.

[skitskatdacat63]

One makes him up, so the other can break him down.

This is a little terrifying but hello!! Posted my first fic on ao3!! I would've saved the illustrations for the fic's eyes only, but I'm too happy with them haha. Hope you'll still go on to read regardless!!

As always, my thoughts and progress, since I can't help myself:

I'm soooooo proud of these. I never ever really do dramatic lighting, so I'm really surprised that I pulled it off.

It's surreal actually posting this because for a while, I've thought about how if I ever post a fic, I'll have to make illustrations too because I can't do anything not full force. Look at me now! I'm shocked. Also didn't think I'd finish it tonight, but here it sits before you nevertheless(though as always, I'm writing this past my bedtime before class, time efficient as always.) So with that being said, here are some notes, though if I had known I'd be writing this so soon, I would've prepared more lol.

First of all, I hope it's clear both of these are Mark's perception. Gah, the fact that his face is the only one you can see clearly. The first is obviously him unwillingly fantasizing about what exactly went down last night.

Aghhhhh the difference in colors and settings of the two drawings is so important to me. The warmth and intimacy of the bed behind curtains in the first one, and the coldness and openess of the second. It's so clear Mark feels like he's been distanced, like he's been ousted. It's like he's been thrown outside on a cold winter's day, no longer able to feel the heat from the comfortable warm stove inside.

Mark was probably assigned to Seb bcs he has a much greater appreciation for the Spanish etiquette, which Seb has very little interest in. He'll abide by it when he absolutely has to. But he's just a very non-typical Emperor. People find it charming so it's not a public death sentence for him, but it is an issue. Thus, Mark is there to keep him in line. Though important to note that when Fernando, who has an equal if not greater respect for the showmanship of etiquette, realizes Mark is interested in that as well, they start warming up to each other.

The inherent disrespect of Fernando just. Throwing Seb's clothing onto the floor. Meanwhile he probably took like, 20 minutes folding his up(that's what Seb was gonna tell Mark at the end of the fic.) Borderline ripping off Seb's clothes only to edge him. Its not even like the ripping off the clothes is because of passion or anything, he's deliberately being an asshole. Don't worry Nandl, Seb's turned on by it!

So sorry to marknando fans if their dynamic feels like a complete 180 haha. Its not like I'm like, they actually hate each other!! It's just their relationship under completely different circumstances. They're like two dogs in a dog fight, they don't have any real reason to hate each other, but they're put against each other regardless. They don't understand their hatred, just know that they have it and that they're supposed to have it. The inherent hatred the mistress has for the spouse, and vice versa. If they actually were able to talk without barriers, they'd realize they actually get along pretty well. They kinda just hate each other because of their respective relationships to Seb. And then there's Seb who's mostly completely oblivious to his effect, though of course plays with it a bit.

Seb's marriage completely recontextualizes their relationship in Mark's eyes. Though there's something incredibly sado-masochistic about the way he can't blame Seb for it at all. He's a loyal dog after all. But when it was just them, he was obviously Seb's main companion and lover. Seb definitely slept with people on the side, but Mark brushed that off: 1. Bcs its very period typical. 2. He was the main, they were the side, what more needs to be said! But now *he's* the side piece, and is left wondering if their relationship was down to proximity alone. Not to pull a Mark and completely excuse Seb, but it's not. Just very different perceptions of love and relationships. And again, as I've mentioned before, he was raised to always be the most important person in the room, so he obviously has very different understandings, especially since he's always the center.

NANDL!!!!!! In my Habsburg book I've been reading lately, they randomly referred to one of them affectionately as "Nandl" and it's stuck in my head ever since. Can we start a movement to canonize that as an official Fernando nickname? I'm sooooo fond of it, I litrally ended the fic that way just so I could shoehorn that nickname in.

Speaking of the ending. It was really tough, I almost wanted to have Fernando burst in, looking for his ring, and then coming across whatever that is. But I didn't want to disrupt their moment anymore, it felt cruel. Though shame I couldn't mention that the reason why Seb's pants are nowhere to be found is because Fernando accidentally put them on and didn't realize till he was out of the room.

*I FORGOT TO POINT OUT ONE OF MY FAVORITE PARTS! Truly the danger of writing a post while falling asleep. There's something so incredibly funny to me the way they're talking so refined and then Seb just throws out: "that guy." It's a way to show his own disrespect of Fernando, not even using his name, implying he's just some guy(nur ein Kerl.) I laughed writing it cause it reminds me of the random dry humor anecdotes I've read lately.

[churipu]

hiiii !!!! it feels so rare to see a blog dedicated to just fluff so i love ur works sm 🫶🫶

could you write abt reader who doesn't know how to ride a bike and the jjk chars teach them? specifically geto x reader pretty pls <33 thank you :} !

JJK MEN + TEACHING YOU BIKE RIDING

featuring. geto suguru, gojo satoru, itadori yuuji x reader

warnings. mentions of a little blood, scrapes, falling off a bike.

note. omg hii anon <33 thank you for giving love to my work, it means a lot to me. sorry this one took so long, i hope you like it, mwah mwah <33

GETO SUGURU. the first time you wanted to learn how to ride a bike was when geto took you bike riding during the weekends, and you were seated at the back while he was the one maneuvering the bike.

"suguru, teach me how to ride a bike."

and that was all it took for him to actually go 'teacher' mode on you, waking you up at eight in the morning to actually coach you from the basics to the most complex things on bike riding. geto is such a patient man, he coaxes you through your fears of falling — promising how he'd be there to catch you if you fall.

little progress is still progress in his eyes, he will ruffle your hair and call out praises to you. telling you that you did a great job and that he's pretty damn proud of your progress.

and believe it or not, he is a man of his words; every time he sees any signs of imbalance or the slightest bit of odd movements, he'd catch up to you by feet and stand by if you fall (which happens most of the time if he's already up there by your side).

for a couple of weeks, he was up early in the morning to teach you how to ride a bike. and hey, you could see the progress in those times, by the time you were able to steer the bike perfectly fine, geto was actually so proud he almost cried (he said he didn't, but he did, just a tiny bit).

"suguru, look!" just seeing the smile on your face as you pedal the bike made his stomach flutter, he is so happy.

after that, he'd always take you bike riding, same place, same time, this time with two bikes for each of you (although sometimes he prefers it if you sat behind him, hugging him tightly).

GOJO SATORU. i could see him being such a proud little shit when you told him that you couldn't ride a bike, it was embarrassing, but he told you he'd teach you how to. and well, he's not the best at teaching — or demonstrating how to ride a bike (despite him being a teacher and all).

since he could, and you couldn't. he ends up teaching you by actually riding the bike without explaining what to do, but hey— he's a dedicated man.

"so you just kind of...do this, and then that, and then yeah it just happens!" he grins and you looked at him in confusion, but said nothing anyways.

it made you reminisce the days back at school when the teacher would ask if you understood what they're saying, and you tell them yes just so you could move on and get it over with. yeah, that was what it looks like during the whole time gojo was teaching you.

it took you a good four months. four. months. because gojo, how do i even say this? during sessions, he would steal your bike and use it for himself— giving it back to you when he feels satisfied, and so it took longer for you to learn.

in fact, it felt like the male was rather a distraction rather than a teacher. but hey, at the end of the day he still succeeded in teaching you how to ride a bike.

"i'm never going to ask you to teach me again," you mutter out, braking in front of him.

gojo gasps out dramatically, "why not? i did it, didn't i?"

he's totally proud of you and he just has to let everyone know, posting pictures of you and he'd write a long caption telling the world about your journey of riding a bike. like a facebook mom.

ITADORI YUUJI. the first time he found out you couldn't ride a bike was when he asks you about bike-riding in the mountains, and you straight up told him you never learnt how to ride one. so, he made it his job to help you learn, and he's not really great at it.

"i don't understand what you mean by that, but yes, let's try it out anyways," yuuji was nervous the first time his grip left the bike's seat, and you were off.

he was trudging behind you, catching up to your slow pace — but still, when he realizes how imbalanced you are, it was too late. one second you were still pedaling the bike, and then the very next second you were kneeling on the ground with a bleeding and scraped knee.

at the very first second he saw you, he was quick to be by your side. he grabs you by your waist and picks you up, muttering out curses under his breath and then apologizing to you non-stop — he felt like it was his fault, he told you if he had been more cautious, you wouldn't be bleeding.

"shit, baby, i'm so sorry. i should've been more careful," he mutters out, wiping off the blood off your wound while blowing on it softly so the pain wouldn't sting as much.

"'s fine, yuuji. it doesn't hurt as much as i thought it would," you chuckle at him, but no matter how hard you try to convince him that it doesn't hurt and it was fine, yuuji still took the blame.

he tries asking you if you still wanted to learn the bike with him, and when you said yes, he's delighted. and more alert, not letting the same thing happen twice. he's such a cutie, he bought you a helmet, a pair of knee protectors, and elbow protectors.

better safe than sorry, even if he bought you those, he was the one catching you when you were about to fall.

for a couple of days, yuuji also tried looking up tutorials on how to ride a bike so that he could explain it to you well, and he was actually quite surprised when you got the hang of it in the first two weeks. proud is an understatement, he's overjoyed that he could take you bike-riding now.

of course he praises you about it, telling how fast of a learner you are and how proud he is. also, he still feels guilty about your fall— and he tries making it up to you by buying you food (which he didn't actually have to since you've forgotten about the fall anyways).

© CHURIPU 2023 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE !

[eddiesleftbuttcheek]

Charles Smith NSFW Headcanons

So in my last post I said there isn’t enough nsfw headcanons of Charles on here so I decided I would write my own 🤭 this is incredibly fluffy btw (also we’re imagining you sleep naked with each other in this)

I think it’s a fandom shared headcanon that this man is such a gentle, passionate lover, like he can absolutely have rough sex with you and loves fucking you every time you both need it. But most of the time this man does not fuck you, he makes love to you.

His kisses are soft, tender, he knows exactly how to kiss you to make you swoon, your heart beat faster, your knees weak, head empty, butterflies in your tummy, legs clenching, arousal brewing, goosebump causing. You know, those kind of kisses.

His touches are feather light, caresses all over your body, looking at you with pure admiration in his eyes, if there was a god somewhere, he would believe it was you.

When you’re both in bed at night he kisses you slowly, starting off with innocent little pecks between giggles and sweet nothings shared between you which progress into open mouthed kisses, getting a little hot and heavy but still not needing to go anywhere if you didn’t want, his hands either holding your cheek or nestled in your hair to bring you impossibly closer, little moans into each other’s mouth to say ‘I love you’ and your hands on his chest rubbing at the muscle sensually, so incredibly attracted to this man it should be illegal. His tongue swipes at your bottom lip lightly, so lightly that you would’ve missed it had your head not been so empty of everything but him. You meet his tongue with yours, rolling them together softly and adding to the quickly heating up atmosphere of the room. Your hands slide up his chest and around his back to play with his hair, massaging his scalp as he lets out an appreciative groan, one of his hands starting to wander, sliding from your hair to your neck and down your chest until he reaches your breasts, gripping one in his hand softly and you let out a little gasp into his mouth as he starts gently squeezing it.

You grip his hair a little tighter than before and as he rubs your sensitive nipple with his thumb you start to gently grind your hips up into his, feeling his semi-hard cock against your bare thigh, a very pleasant and welcome surprise.

His lips leave yours and start to trail kisses down your neck, sucking as he goes leaving little red marks that you know will turn into bruises through the night until he gets to your breasts and latches his mouth around the nipple his other hand isn’t busy with, he goes between sucking them and licking over them, switching between them so they get the same attention. He could gladly do this all night, he loves playing with your boobs, even more so because he knows how sensitive they are and how wet you get just from him touching them.

The longer he spent at your boobs, the harder you were starting to grind up into him, you were leaving a big wet patch on his naval but neither of you cared, it turned him on so much to know how easy it was for him to make you feel good and it felt too good for you to be embarrassed about it.

‘Charles’ you whisper into the air, hoping he gets the hint that you were starting to get needy, that you wanted more. He just kept doing what he was doing and as he lightly nipped at your nipple you almost whined his name this time. ‘Charles’.

You feel him smirk against your skin as he takes your hint and restarts his kisses again. Going down between your breasts, leaving feather light kisses and touches on your ribs, his touch so soft trailing down your waist you almost squirm from the tickling sensation before he finally gets to where you need him most and he starts kissing and leaving little marks on your inner thighs.

Now I know for a fact that Charles would be a massive giver, like, wouldn’t even think about his pleasure first and giving you pleasure literally gives him pleasure, seriously he could cum from eating you out. (Yes he has before). You know. One of those types.

So when he finally leans in and gives your clit a little kitten lick, this time you do whine and it’s that little noise that drives him up the wall as he begins to devour you. I’m talking sloppy, messy, mind blowing, toe curling head. It’s one of his favourite things to do and in your opinion it’s one of the things he’s best at.

He has his tongue inside of you, greedily lapping up your juices and sucking them out of you, his eyes closed in concentration, opening every so often to look at your head thrown back in pleasure, one hand gripping his head and the other clutching the pillow beside your head. How you look during sex always makes him fall even more in love with you, how your head rolls back, hands grip to anything they can (especially his muscles oooooh how you both have a kink for his muscles 😩), your mouth making the perfect silent ‘o’ as you struggle to take a breath from the pleasure your feeling, only being able to focus on him. His fingers, his mouth, his cock, anything about him that is bringing you closer to the edge. (So literally his entire being lmao)

When he finally slides a finger into you it immediately goes to the hilt, you’re so wet and needy that he’s able to add a second one to join it with no resistance immediately, he watches as your eyebrows and nose scrunch, your mouth falling open as you let out one of those delicious noises, reminding Charles of his very obvious hard on. He scissors his fingers gently, slowly getting you ready for him. (It’s canon that this man is huge have you seen that picture at the top of this post? Oh my lordddd so yes he absolutely has a big dick argue with the wall.)

His tongue attaches back onto your clit and the pressure of him lightly suckling the bud and slowly opening you up for him is too much for you to take and you cum for the first time with a gasp and a loud moan, grinding your hips again as your pussy twitches and tightens around him as you ride it out.

The orgasm makes you relax enough that he decides it would be enough to take him and with a quick look up to you, you nod and he immediately gets up and settles between your thighs. He runs the head of his cock through your folds, getting him lubed up and slowly dragging over your still sensitive clit as you let out little moans and mewls at the touches.

Finally he lines up and slowly pushes into you, groaning as he does, you’ve been together a while but he will never get used to the feeling of filling you for the first time during your sessions, you’re so warm and wet that it makes even a man like him with insane self control struggle to hold back.

As I said before this man is gentle and passionate so although his thrusts are slow they are pretty hard, filling you up perfectly and it is just the right mix of gentle but passionate that it has you moaning immediately, already knowing you were going to be able to cum more than once tonight.

He’s a very romantic man when he’s in love I think so he would be full of praise for you, constantly reassuring you during sex and making you feel so good about yourself you feel like a god with the way he talks to you.

‘Oooh that’s it baby. You’re doing so well for me. You feel so good. So good for me my love’ (holy hell I’m not okay 😩)

You couldn’t hold in your moans even if you wanted to, every single thrust is angled so perfectly, the rhythm is delicious and the power of his thrusts make your eyes roll back and goosebumps rise all over your arms from the pleasure of it.

‘Fuckkk, you feel so good baby. You feel good?’

You can’t even answer him as every single thrust he makes hits your g spot perfectly, you can’t contain your noises and you involuntarily clench around him every so often as he hits so deep inside of you that you forget your own name; your mind only being filled with one thing. Charles. Charles. Charles.

One of his hands grips your thigh with a bruising but pleasurable grip, the other going back to your cheek as he leans down to kiss you, it’s mainly just teeth clashing together as you moan into each other’s mouths but it’s intimate. So intimate.

He moves his hand from your cheek to trail down your body again, rubbing over the marks he left softly and going further and further until he reaches your clit again. He rubs it with the right amount of pressure, speed and intensity, knowing exactly how to make you mewl so the only thing you can think about is the pleasure you feel, not any problems outside of this room, just how this man is making you feel.

He gathers wetness from your thighs and goes back to rubbing your clit, the added wetness giving you exactly what you needed to tumble. No. Full force pelt off that edge again. You cum around him, clenching on him so hard he almost gets pushed out, he can feel you cumming, how even more wet you get as your cum mixes with your other juices, he watches you as you cum, panting into his mouth and moaning loudly, your eyes roll back further than they had before, only able to see the whites of your eyes, your jaw fell further open, head thrown back as you let out those sinful noises, you can see stars, feel yourself throbbing around Charles as you come back down from the high, seeing that he was watching you always makes you blush.

‘God you’re so beautiful like that. I almost came on the spot just watching that.’

You giggle a little before you let out another moan as he starts to thrust again, going after his own pleasure now that he knows you won’t be able to cum again for a while after an orgasm like that. His groans and moans get even louder the closer he gets. His muscles flex and tense, his eyebrows furrowing as his mouth too falls open to let more of the sounds out. He looks so beautiful when he cums, eyes closed, eyebrows scrunched, mouth open and making the most obscene, sexy noises you’ve ever heard a man make. You feel him throbbing inside of you as he cums inside of you, only stopping his thrusting as he too comes down from the high.

With a final moan he pulls out of you and lays down on the bed beside you, pulling you into his arms so your head is on his chest, your hand running across the scars there as he rubs your back soothingly.

‘You done so well for me. Always do so well for me.’

You blush slightly and your heart swells from the praise of your lover.

‘I love you, Charles.’ you say, throwing a leg over his, bringing you too even closer. He plants a kiss on your head before replying.

‘I love you more. My angel.’

~~~~~~~~~~~~

WOOOOOOOO good lord this was hot and heavy I can’t believe I wrote this 🤭

Let’s ignore the fact it basically turned into a one shot pls.

I enjoyed this way too much. Love ya byeeee <3

[a-court-of-fics-and-errors]

Keep Moving Forwards, Part 6

Azriel x Reader Fic

Summary: After finally deciding to leave your abusive and manipulative mate for good, you find unexpected companionship with Azriel, the Shadowsinger of the Night Court. As you navigate the aftermath of your traumatic relationship, you struggle to understand where the mating bond went wrong and contemplate your path forward, vowing never to return to the past.

Find other parts here: Master List

Content Warning: This story contains depictions of extreme emotional manipulation and abuse, mentions of physical abuse, loss of a child, and general trauma.

Word Count: 1.7k

Author's Note:

Just a heads-up that the next part of this series will offer two reading options due to sensitive topics in the upcoming section. There will be the original post titled "Keep Moving Forwards, Part 7" with the unedited content, and another version titled "Keep Moving Forwards, Part 7, Summary" that summarizes the material to avoid any discomfort.

For those who have asked to be tagged, you will be automatically tagged in the summarized part to ensure no one accidentally encounters content they might find triggering or uncomfortable. If you are tagged and wish to read the original, please visit my main page when the next part is posted tomorrow at 12:00 PM EST. The two options will be posted simultaneously.

Thank you for your support and understanding. I'll see you tomorrow.

This is a multi-part series. Unlike my previous works, this fanfiction delves deeper than just fluff, exploring complex emotional landscapes. As I navigate this new writing journey, I kindly ask for gentle feedback. The topics addressed are profoundly impactful, touching many lives with diverse experiences. Please be gentle with yourselves and others. Healing is a journey, and everyone processes it differently. Be kind to yourself. Take what resonates, and leave what doesn’t.

Please continue reading, being aware of the above content warnings, ensuring you are in a healthy headspace. Give yourself time to process and be gentle with yourself.

Days blurred together as you continued to heal. Azriel made himself scarce, sending Anthea to check on your progress and report back to him. However, he still ensured your meals were slightly more palatable than the standard fare of the training camp, often adding fruits or sweets when he could. Over the next two days, you shared your meals with Anthea, who only ever took a bite or two before refusing any more, despite your encouragement. Neither of you asked many questions, and your interactions remained brief. You no longer needed help turning over, but your body was still weak, limiting you to short walks across the room.

On your first attempt to walk, you collapsed, and Azriel appeared like a shadow to help you up. You quickly pushed him away, determined to maintain your independence. You also began hiding knives under the mattress and storing non-perishable food in the bedside drawers, preparing for the day you could leave. Your stash included two apples, a pear, and some rolls. Not much, but it was a start.

By the fourth day, you had enough strength to get out of bed and look out the window. The camp outside was a bleak sight. You could see distant mountain ranges, but the camp was nestled in a clearing deep in the woods, a space likely carved out by the Illyrians. The thought of ancient trees felled, sent crashing into the mud for this camp turned your stomach.

The camp itself was a muddy mess. To your right and left, you saw other log cabin-like structures similar to the one you were in, each with pointed roofs and a few windows. Below, the ground sloped down to rows of small, mud-splattered tents on wooden platforms. Footprints crisscrossed the muddy ground, and soldiers moved up and down the hills. In the center of the tent village was a larger log structure, which seemed to be the mess hall, where soldiers gathered at mealtimes.

Scattered among the tents were slightly larger tents, likely for higher-ranking soldiers, and raised platforms with canopies, tables, and chairs, their purpose unclear. On the edges of the camp were fenced-in pens where soldiers, each with their hulking wings, practiced sword fighting. They took great pleasure in knocking each other into the mud and continuing their fights with fists, resembling wild animals.

A particularly ostentatious Illyrian soldier often removed his shirt during fights, choosing to battle bare-chested, swinging his sword with reckless abandon. You half-wondered if only the strongest survived because they were killed before they could even make it to battle.

You noticed very few females around, and the ones you did see were in the same state as Anthea—battered, seemingly brutalized, and sneaking between rows of tents. They quickly retreated to hiding spaces or even into the woods at the sight of a group of males. Over the next few days, you watched Anthea tread a careful path from the mess hall to your cabin, ducking behind tents and listening intently for male footsteps before scurrying like a mouse to the next sheltered area. Every female seemed fearful of the soldiers, and it wasn’t hard to piece together why.

It rained incessantly here, with daily torrential downpours turning the meadow into a muddy quagmire. Despite the rain, the soldiers carried on with their training. Many ventured into the treeline in groups, disappearing for most of the day or night and returning either exhausted or invigorated. You never saw anyone without wings coming or going from the camp, making you acutely aware that you might be the only non-winged creature among them.

Once Anthea decided you had spent enough time wrapped in bandages, she brought you new clothes. She apologized for the fit, noting that they only had sizes for males, and these were the smallest options available. While they hung from your body and required extra rope to keep the pants up, you were grateful for the offer. Azriel continued to flit in and out at random times. In your time spent at the window, you often saw him leaving early in the morning, wandering into the tented area, and entering the larger tents. He rarely interacted with the soldiers, maintaining his role as Spymaster, keeper of the High Lord’s secrets.

On the seventh day, Anthea brought your breakfast and wished you a good morning as she set it down on the bed. You remained curled up by the window, but as she dropped the tray, you called over your shoulder, “I think I would like to go.”

Anthea paused, turning to you. “Go where?” she inquired.

“Just go,” you replied, stretching your legs out and standing to investigate the meal. You picked up a piece of toast with purple jam smeared on it and met her eyes, which widened slightly at your request.

“I don’t understand. Where do you want to go?” she asked again.

You shook your head slightly. “Go away from here.”

“Where are you going?” she asked, picking at the scabs on her hands.

You chewed and swallowed the toast, the rhubarb and strawberry blend coating your tongue with its sour deliciousness. “Not sure yet. I just need to get moving. I can’t stay here anymore.”

Anthea looked at you, still utterly puzzled. “You... you can’t leave.”

You stopped chewing, placing the toast back on the plate and wiping the crumbs on your pants. “What do you mean I can’t?”

“No one leaves,” she stammered. “They always bring you back.”

A lump formed in your throat. It wasn’t that you couldn’t leave; Anthea just couldn’t imagine a world where anyone could. “You tried to leave?” you asked.

Anthea nodded, her gaze cast to the floor. She didn’t elaborate, just continued nodding.

“What happened?”

Anthea shook her head slightly, pressing her fingers into a wound that oozed around them. She didn’t speak.

“Did they hurt you?” you asked.

Anthea still didn’t speak, just shaking her head as she found a new scab to pick at.

“Anthea,” you said, reaching for her to stop her from scratching. She took two steps back immediately, running into the swords and axes poised at the edge of the fireplace, sending them clanging to the floor. Azriel appeared instantly as Anthea dropped to the floor, trying to pick up the weapons while apologizing profusely. He looked between Anthea and you, trying to piece together what had happened. Anthea continued apologizing until Azriel knelt beside her and began picking up the weapons too. She whispered her apologies again before Azriel placed his hands on her shoulders. She jumped slightly, and her eyes seemed to glaze over.

“It’s okay,” he whispered. “Nothing is wrong.”

Anthea nodded, tears filling her eyes as Azriel released her. She quickly stood, glanced at you with a tear rolling down her cheek, then briskly walked out of the room, covering her mouth with her hand. You turned to the window and watched her exit the house, heading into the nearby woods.

Azriel finished placing the weapons back in their spots before turning to you. “What happened?” he asked.

You watched the treeline for a second, and when Anthea didn’t reappear, you turned back towards him. “Nothing,” you said.

Azriel looked around the room, then back at you. “You’re standing.”

“Yes,” you replied.

“That’s,” he paused, stuttering slightly, “that’s good.”

You nodded before taking a few steps toward him. “I want to leave.”

A flash of emotion crossed Azriel’s face, but it was gone before you could read it. “Where are you going?” he asked.

You looked up at him, noting how he towered over you, forcing you to crane your neck to see his face. “It’s none of your concern.”

Azriel sighed, running his hand through his hair—a gesture you had begun to notice he did when nervous or uncomfortable.

“Look, I-” Azriel started.

You interrupted him, “I appreciate what you’ve done, and you’ve been very generous. I just think I need to move on.”

“If this is about what happened earlier-” Azriel started again, but you cut him off once more.

“It has nothing to do with that,” you noted. “I just want to be on my way and out of your hair.”

Azriel paused, searching for the right words. “Let me at least get you where you want to go,” he finally said. “It’s not like your journey was going well the last time.”

You scoffed lightly. “There’s no need for that.”

“Please,” Azriel insisted.

“If I say no, will you make me stay?” you asked.

Azriel paused. “No. I won’t make you stay.”

“Good,” you replied. “I want to leave then. Today.”

Azriel’s eyes widened. “No, that’s not a good idea.”

“Why not?”

Azriel glanced out the window as clouds began rolling in for the daily downpour. “It’s going to rain soon.”

You didn’t bother looking out the window. “Then I will leave after.”

Azriel looked back at you, his eyes pleading. “Can you just wait a few more days?”

“What am I waiting for?” you asked shortly.

“Just give me some time to plan.”

Your brows furrowed. “Given you aren’t coming with me, I don’t particularly understand what you need to plan for.”

“Just, please,” Azriel pleaded, his eyes filled with yearning. “Stay a few more days, and then you can leave.”

You ground your teeth, feeling like a caged animal. “Fine.” There was no way you could push past him, and it was clear he could outrun you if you tried.

“Thank you,” he said, his face relaxing slightly. He ran his hand over his face. “What happened with Anthea?” he asked again.

You stopped, annoyed he repeated the question. “I asked her if I could leave, and before she could answer, she accidentally knocked down the swords.” You pointed to the weapons now restacked.

“Got it,” Azriel responded. He glanced at your half-eaten breakfast. “Are you done with this?” he asked.

You nodded, crossing your arms, the bruise on your side causing a pang of pain.

Azriel picked up the tray and left, leaving you alone in the room once more. It was clear your request had bothered him as his anxiety left hard rock in your stomach. You wouldn’t be staying long, certainly not a few more days.

Authors Note: Thanks for all the continued support from the following readers who asked to be tagged!

@thatacotargirl @mcuamerica @lilah-asteria @florabelll @fightmedraco @marvelbros-oneshots @mariahoedt @quinzzelx @romantasyreader28 @minnieoo @mysteriouslydeafeningwerewolf @annabethgranger123 @krowiathemythologynerd @scatteredstardustt @romantasyreader28

[theoddest1]

Hazbin Hotel episode 5 is a rushed mess.

May just make this a continual thing where I review the episodes from here on out.

-Right off the bat, the pacing for this episode is probably the worst out of all other episodes so far. Things just begin abruptly (Lucifer's first song with Al for instance), no build up, 5 months have passed in only 5 episodes of barely any progress or focus on Charlie as a character, a random character that didn't need to be introduced but was anyway ruined the flow further, and this stupid ass rivalry all on the basis of who's the "better dad" is legit the most random conflict of any conflict so far. That will get a point all on its own along with some of the other things mentioned. The pacing left no real breathing room aside from 2 moments: Al's rise to power and Husk n Al's convo. I wanna say the second song would be a 3rd but it just resolves an issue that was present for seemingly years and pulled a "Stolas" with having a song or sob story as an excuse for the lack of effort to reach out and be a better dad. Lazy writing and pacing overall.

-5 months....5 months have passed with barely anything revolving around helping sinners or trust built around the main cast SHOWN ON SCREEN. We are told important information opposed to witnessing the progress itself. This is not only lazy but extremely jarring cause it feels as though episodes were skipped and bonds feel unearned. They get easily resolved in what feels like seconds, and we're just supposed to....deal with it. Angel and Husk barely interact throughout this episode, which, after the crazy ride they had, with the knowledge of a SEVERAL MONTHS passing by as well, you'd think Angel would be shown to be more chatty with him....which he doesn't. Nothing crazy, just small bits of them interacting and enjoying each other's company. Nah. We get that next episode, and even THAT'S lacking. I'll tackle that in a separate post. But yeah, 5 months, and we have yet to see the other guests' views and how it has changed for the better or the process of them realizing WHY they would go for redemption. How that has affected them. Nothing of note has come about from any of these. No other sinners have joined. No other demons seem interested in Charlie's Hotel. Nothing. We are told things have been done, yet it feels like we are still at the starting line, or well, a foot away from it and miles away from the finish.

- Lucifer is a joke. I don't mind me a goofy threat, it adds a charm to them but also shows that they take so little seriously due to their immense power....not Lucifer. No, that guy just....is a joke. Dude is in his mansion making fucking toy ducks for some reason and just has depression (show said it outright, not even depression is spared from "tell don't show")

He does literally nothing, doesn't seem to WANT to do anything, and no one respects the guy. Nearly all in the Hotel lack fear, intimidation, or admiration for the guy (Pentious is the only one who seems to exhibit admiration of some kind). The closest we got is being uncomfortable. That's it. Then there's his scuffle with Alastor. Tell me why he feels the need to argue with this sucka again? Cause last I checked, Alastor is a mere overlord, and Lucifer is The Devil. Wtf is this randomass rivalry that just...S T A R T S? Why does Lucifer get intimidated or moved by Al? It makes no sense. Lucifer has been alive far longer than humanity itself, but nah this random fuck who looks like he robbed a blood bank got him weeping insecurities? I'm supposed to take this sad excuse of a character seriously? How many of these carbon copy characters will Viv make until I finally end my suffering???

-Wtf is Alastor's deal? Why is he so pressed and annoyed? One moment he is as cool and collected as a cucumber and showing only SLIGHT annoyance (Vox and His song), then he goes to meetings and speaks with people far older, far more experienced, and/or far stronger than he show no interest and he gets pissy? How insecure is he that people not caring where he's gone or thinking his ideas are wack is what leads to his eye twitching and him throwing a random ass cuss. Seriously, THAT'S what got him to swear? That his idea for the hotel's name is stupid? BFFR! You can not be serious right now, THAT'S what gets him going? You'd think with how witty and chill he was in the pilot, he would find a quick and a effective smart-ass comeback, not essentially bitch at The Devil. This makes Alastor look like a thin-skinned wannabe, too cause these minor ass comebacks are why he has lost his edge along with some randomass song number?? And at the end of the day, Al just couldn't be damned anymore to even care by the end of the episode, he doesn't speak with Lucifer or give any stank looks, doesn't speak with Charlie, does NOTHING pertaining to the issues prior, nah, he just stands there and watches after telling Mimzy to go away. Some say he did this to simply piss Lucifer off, but that doesn't make sense (not saying it ain't true, just saying if it is, it's nonsensical). First off, if that were the case, why was he annoyed even BEFORE seeing the guy?

If he only wanted to get a rise, why is HE getting angry? Trolls usually don't care enough to be this pissed. Second, wtf would he even gain from doing this? What to help push Lucifer to be a better father to Charlie, request by Lilith to Al so that Lucifer can get his act together?? If so, that's the LAZIEST shit I have ever heard. Lucifer is such a joke, he needed a SINNER to get him back on track....

Regardless, this whole father shit by Al comes out of nowhere and ruins the goddamn flow of the episode. Prior to it all, Al has shown NO interest in anyone and has done jack shit. Wtf does he even do? He's done ONE thing so far and that was help for the commercial. Alastor has shown to be completely useless as of now.

-Charlie, why is she treated as tho she isn't a grown ass woman? She's babied to hell and back and despite being the daughter of Lucifer, hasn't shown any of her abilities to help the hotel. So Lucifer can summon shit but not her? Is she that useless? Also, gotta love how she never asks her dad about the Valentino situation to help Angel out. Man...what a great ass friend. She also doesn't find it weird that Al is just suddenly...babying her? She has zero awareness of everything, I guess, which is getting annoying now. You're over 200 years of age (went to high school in the 1800s according to what her comic was about, but guess that's retconned based on what happens in the following episode).

So she doesn't use her abilities to tidy up the place, she doesn't act her damn age, she doesn't do anything to help her sexually assaulted friend. What a damn joke, just like her dad.

-Mimzy shouldn't have been in an episode about Lucifer. Plain and simple. Her character should have been introduced in one of the earlier episodes. Not during fucking this. And we got a repeat of the pilot with Alastor's backstory retold. So they're down to retell his rise to power but not to make at least a proper recap of the events that happened prior? Key word....PROPER.

-Husk caring about Mimzy bringing trouble is actually fucking stupid. Because of the lack of proper build up to him now finding more reason to like the Hotel, it feels forced that he would be worried about what danger Mimzy brought. And on top of that, yeah...ALASTOR IS RIGHT THERE. You know who else is there? LUCIFER. I get it, Lucifer stood by and watched as the Hotel was being swatted, but he also sang a song about providing what Charlie asked for, meaning if she had asked her dad, he woukd be down to help, so WHY TF IS HE WORRIED???? Also , is Charlie just INCAPABLE of fighting for herself?? "She doesn'twanna hurt sinners-" so she had no defensive abilities??? What???? Also, that's a damn lie, she fought Katie Killjoy on live Tv. Are no other damn people capable of protecting the Hotel??? Why did Al need to step in for that? They were just LOAN SHARKS.

Anyway, the scene where Husk is probing Alastor about Mimzy and treating him as a pet is decently paced and the tone was pretty neat, sucks that this feels like their way of showing that Husk is also under a leash like Angel rather than him being treated as a joke, which btw...horrid way to compare the two. Wanna know why? One is subjected to an onslaught of sexual assault whether he was pushing Val's buttons or not, and forced to be assaulted by various men around him, passed around like a thing. The other is Husk, who legit disrespected Alastor and had to push at him to get such humiliation and terror, and guess what....Al still ended up pushing Mimzy away after she did end up bringing trouble, so he did essentially listen to Husk in his own distant way. This is the ONLY TIME we see Al be downright mean to Husk and probably the only time. Angel has been subjected to nothing but horrid assault after assault no matter the situation. So I better not see anyone say, "SEE LOOK, THEY'RE BOTH ABUSED" stfu. Nothing about their situations are even remotely similar. Just cause the chains are the same doesn't mean the users are. EDIT: Ima say this before people act like I excuse this. No, I am not excusing Alastor's actions. I am pointing out what happened on screen. Husk mocked Alastor, Alastor retaliated out of anger(much like how Angel retaliated at Husk in ep 4 after Husk kept arguing and mocking him) by pulling out the chains to shut him up. He didn't even hit Husk. Again, I'm not excusing it, just pointing out how vastly different Husk and Angel's situations are and how one overlord reacts compared to the other....who is a straight-up rapist.

-Both the songs are mid/ok but pulled down by the awful storytelling....shame. I at first was not fond of Lucifer's voice.....it's ok now, I guess. Idk. I'm still not really feeling it, though.

Episode sucked ass

Pacing was all over the place

ALASTOR AND LUCIFER ARE PISS BABIES

[neopianbiologyproject]

Welcome!

Hello and welcome to The Neopian Biology Project!

This blog is an offshoot of a series of posts started on my main account. It is run by me, @asterixcalibur, in association with Happy Lab Accidents on @cabletwo. I'm an artist and funny person by trade, but a biologist by tragic BDGilbertian retribution.

The goal of this project is to identify all of Neopia's unique species, categorize them by kingdom and region of origin, and find an ideal specimen for each that can be put into a natural history museum (my gallery on Neopets). As of writing, the project has identified over 2000 unique species of Neopian wildlife.

Our main methodology is scouring item descriptions for helpful information. This process also involves researching and standardizing the taxonomical, ecoregional, and evolutionary timeline terminology of Neopia.

Longer term goals are to obtain the ideal specimen of every identified species for the museum, and renovate the museum into a simulated museum experience through careful application of visual assets and CSS/HTML. Maybe one day we can shoot for the Gallery Spotlight?

On Neopets

My account on Neopets is classypotassium. Feel free to ask to be NeoFriends -- just tell me who you are here!

The Neopian Biological Sciences Natural History Museum itself is here.

Ways to Contribute

1. Donate a specimen

If you'd like to donate or loan a specimen to the museum, contact me so we can discuss attribution and collateral!

The gallery's JellyNeo wishlist is here. It will be continually updated as specimens are identified, so consider it a work in progress. As of writing I also haven't checked anything off even if it's been obtained, so double check the museum before offering donations!

2. Donate Neopoints

You can also "donate" by buying a Plushie Fungus from my shop! These are intentionally overpriced so that the change can be considered a charitable donation.

3. Interact here!

A lot of the posts that end up here are going to be asking for people's thoughts on origin, kingdom, uniqueness, and so on, through polls and direct questions.

You can also submit items, images, links, art, specimens, fossils, documentation, scientific papers, primary sources, etc. and so on, for consideration by the Project!

You don't need to know anything about Neopets to put in your two NP (or cents USD). In fact, sometimes it's better to get a perspective grounded in normal Earth biology, because, speaking as a biologist here in Neopia, I can very well say oh ym god please help ohhhh my god you don't even know

Conclusion

You don't need to be into Neopets to enjoy or contribute to this blog; I'll try my best to write posts so that they can be enjoyed by anyone aware of but not necessarily into Neopets. In my experience, explaining Neopets to someone entirely unfamiliar with it is always fun. This shit runs deep, dark, and as spaghetti as its code. Best part of Neopets, to me, is that the site rewards you for exploration, and some of the most consequential but by far weirdest lore can only be found by happening upon a page six links deep into a chain of site features that have gone untouched since 2009, as part of a philosophy of interaction that runs the entire site and is entirely against modern website design principles.

Anyway,

Thank you for visiting!

Science awaits!

[astral-mariner]

Updated pinned post with my social links and recent art and fics! About: I'm a queer man in my mid 30s. I've been writing for over 20 years, and it's what I love to do. Horror/angst, sci-fi/fantasy, and erotica are my favorite things to write. I've been in the Dragon Ball fandom for over a decade and have been a fan longer than that.

Links:

AO3 Twitter/X Ko-fi Bluesky

Fics:

I have 2 spicy vegebul one-shots, "Strength and Weakness" and its sequel "Indulgence and Denial." Below are illustrations I've done for each one.

I also have a Saiyans under Freeza/Vegeta backstory darkfic currently in progress! I've posted the prologue and part 1 so far, but I've written about 80% of the rest of the story. I want to finish it before I start posting regularly. Summary and illustration below: Homeworld Lost:

Via Raditz’s broken scouter, Bulma tries to recover access to Planet Trade networks and technologies to get an upper hand against the androids. But in so doing, she discovers Raditz’s private files—writings and recordings he kept for himself over his long travels with Vegeta and Nappa under Freeza. Tales of their exploits and descent into madness come to change her perception of Vegeta and her relationship with him. Homeworld Lost is a novel-length dark science-fantasy story with explicit violence, horror, and erotica (sometimes simultaneously). Generally canon compliant. Explores Vegeta’s backstory under the Planet Trade Organization and his fraught relationships with his comrades, particularly the twisted bond he and Raditz share. Most of the story is narrated by Raditz, but there are lots of twists. He is an unreliable narrator, and in places, altered mental states allow him to take other points of view. We also get interludes from Bulma as she reads and reacts to Raditz's account.

I illustrate fics for myself and others generally! I also enjoy doing screencap redraws. Here are some of my recent pieces: