#my opinion on macs wont change though

[spell-bloom]

What is considered both a reasonable and maximum polycount for custom content hair and other types of custom content in The Sims 2 and does it depend on gaming specs? Also your work is great!

Thank you for taking the time to read it.

I, personally, use hair that is under 25K polys unless it's unique and cute. Anything over that is overboard and should get decimated. Any furniture or clothing over 10K is extreme for me.

As for specs, I'm inclined to believe that it's a game limitation, how powerful your computer specs are, and a secret third and fourth thing, your OS, and if you're a laptop user.

This OS talk is a side tangent, so bear with me:

Big disclaimer that this is all my opinion, not a factual piece. Don't take this as gospel and I'm far from an expert on operating softwares, computers, and CC for that matter. I went a little bit insane with the OS talk because you mentioned specs and this has been on my mind for a while 🥴

Every single time I've heard that someone installed TS2 on Linux, they are able to play on maximum settings with a BUNCH of CC for a long time and experience no pink soup or pink soup related crashing. I want to do my own research and play the same heavily detailed lot for the same amount of time on Windows and Linux and compare the differences as well as compare how they use resources differently. If I already did not have an attachment to Photoshop CC 2017, I would have made the switch by now.

Okay so Windows... I've played TS2 on my Asus laptop from 2020 and on my new desktop. Here's the spec difference

Laptop: Intel Core i7-9750H 6 Core Processor, 8 GB RAM, NVIDIA GeForce GTX 1650 (Windows 10)

Desktop: AMD Ryzen 5 2600X Six-Core Processor, 16 GB RAM, NVIDIA GeForce GTX 1080 Ti (Windows 11)

My laptop was really good for it's time (I bought it in March 2020), but it was pink soup galore for any cluttered CC lot, even with all of the fixes and GRM edits. My current setup is a mish mosh of my bf's and ex's computer parts and it runs perfectly fine, but I do not play long enough to encounter pink soup. (I have a job and I mainly play to get CC previews these days.) If you noticed, both my CPU and GPU were made before my laptop was sold, and yet it still performs way better. Laptops with top of the line hardware will never be more powerful than PCs with even mid to high level hardware from 5 years ago. Don't forget that laptops will throttle performance to protect itself from overheating and causing damage.

There is also no difference between installing and playing the game on Windows 10 and Windows 11, except that you should absolutely uninstall OneDrive if you haven't already. There might be some issue if you install with discs, but I don't own the discs.

And as for Mac, I truly believe that Mac is the worst way to experience Sims 2. Between the Super Collection crap, not being able to use third party tools (SimPE, Hair Binner, any other .exe files made to run for Windows), and the file limit that really hits you hard if you download a bunch of CC that you can't merge anyway because CCMerger can't run on Mac. I should say I have never played Sims 2 on a Mac, but this is my opinion after reading about the struggles of other MacOS users online.

The point of this OS tangent? None, really. I'm not trying to persuade you to use Linux or stop using Mac, this is simply what I've noticed and my opinions on the matter. There's millions of variables I did not cover such as DXVK, texture sizes, difference in specs between each OS and user and many other things I am forgetting.

Feel free to correct, add on, extrapolate or whatever. If you have any thoughts, please comment, add it in reblogs, or tag me in your post. I'm very interested in the current topics about high polys, pink soup and big textures for this game.

[millenari]

Give me your mistocavity headcannons pls pls

I like the idea of Misto and Macavity finding something in each other that they don't get anywhere else, even in a platonic context. They share a lot of parallels with each other that the other cats don't have, and I like the idea of them being connected somehow. By fate or the Everlasting Cat or something like that-- I've seen hcs where Misto was made as a punishment or counter for Macavity specifically and I kind of like that.

Also theres something kinda funny about 'this guy was made as a personalized cosmic punishment for my evil deeds & represents everything I could have been if I hadn't decided to be so self-serving and cruel. we bone sometimes.'

Misto can actually be pretty brutal, though you may not get that impression from him if youve read my gold rush fic. He's pretty susceptible to ideas like justice and rightful vengeance, and is rarely upset inherently by the sight of violence.

However if he thinks a situation isn't Right, he'll stop at nothing to prevent it from happening, so Macavity has to be careful about what he lets Misto see. Not because Misto's a delicate flower who'll change opinions of Mac if he sees him Do A Violence, but because Misto will come out guns blazing if he thinks Macavity is being an asshole, and Misto's basically the only cat in London who can rock Macavity's shit if he so desired (without suffering major damage in return, that is)

On that note, by virtue of being able to teleport, Macavity cannot force Misto to do anything or keep him anywhere.

This pisses him off so fucking bad.

This makes Misto very smug.

The only way Macavity can 'make' Misto do anything is by virtue (virtue?) of manipulation, which unfortunately for Misto he tends to be pretty susceptible to. They are constantly playing 4d chess with each other, and Misto tends to assume anything that comes out of Macavity's mouth is at least 30% untrue and 80% said with an agenda.

Weirdly though, he finds that kind of freeing. Misto struggles with implication sometimes and worries a lot about being patronized/misled/etc by his peers pretty much constantly. But with Macavity he knows Mac is trying to fuck with him, so it kind of just takes all of the worrying about if it is happening right off the table.

When Macavity is being Relatively Normal he frequently reminds Misto of Tugger and it kind of freaks him out.

That being said, they tend to enjoy each other's company in good times. They have a similar sense of humor, and Misto's (fairly small) mean streak sometimes lines up with Macavity's.

Macavity kind of has this vision in his head of his Ultimate Relationship which is kind of this unconventional throuple-slash-harem with him, Misto, and Demeter- but he knows it wont ever happen because if he ever successfully captures Demeter Misto will let her go. So if he wanted to keep Demeter he'd have to run Misto off first.

So his options are either have all of Demeter (only if he succeeds in taking her) or have, like, half of Misto willingly. It's a constant conundrum for him.

Due to his particular singular focus and trend towards obsession Macavity will frequently neglect grooming himself (those uncombed damned whiskers) and due to being an insane neat freak Misto will just follow him around and comb through his tail or whatever. so youll have macavity getting a Mission Report from Henchcat #253 standing there Menacingly with his arms crossed but right behind him is this small man who's holding up all 35 billion metric tons of his fluffy tail doing the cat equivalent of giving him a blowout.

Misto frequently joins Macavity for varying jobs but doesn't contribute or anything. Sometimes he wanders off part of the way through but most of the time he just kind of watches. Oftentimes judgmentally. Like so:

[macdensex]

even if rcg didnt mean to dennis’s slow progression into what he becomes is honestly pretty good writing and even realistic. they all act different at the beginning versus now of course and i could like analyze all of them bc its not just dennis who’s changed. however i think throughout all the changes each character has made (intentional through rcg or not but i doubt its intentional) dennis’s progression - like i stated earlier - is the most realistic. the story starts out when the gang is in their late 20s - u can tell dennis has issues but ultimately he seems more in touch and “there” than later on. i think this is normal considering his age at the beginning. this is also before frank showed up or barbara was involved in the story, so keep that in mind. as the story progresses, in my opinion, we see dennis pull back and kind of warp into what dennis is into at least season 14 and 15. i think a lot of things caused this but the most important one is trauma bonding. almost 20 years have passed since the first episode and if the gang wasn’t trauma bonded before (i think they were), they definitely are now. i think as time progressed and MANY things happened (frank coming back, realizing he’s not his bio father, realizing mac is actually gay and gay for him, frank going from homophobic to getting it, even barbara dying despite dennis’s “reaction” or lack thereof, etc.) it really shaped dennis into the dennis we see in s14/15 and before. s16 is interesting though because it lowkey seems like dennis is changing. not necessarily in a big way, but a way we haven’t seen yet. the whole johnny thing is a HUGE can of worms i wont go into, but that was wild. dtamhd is also interesting because what we see, in my opinion, is progression. he still has to be in control, but there’s ways he copes with it that the viewer hasnt seen before so it really give you a diff perspective. i think that those people are right, in s16 there is a dennis shift and it’s really interesting! i hope they keep it up in the last seasons! but i dont think hes going to magically become more open or how he was at the beginning of the show. why would he? hes in his 40s, almost 50 and he’s pushed himself into this kind of hole that he’s stuck in (as is rest of the gang, but this isnt about all the gang ive been typing too much as it is) & i dont think theres any way to go back to the way you thought and acted in your 20s. ive rambled on for long enough but

tl;dr dennis is extremely fucked up & traumatized and there is an explanation for his character “growth” and wanting to see him act how he did in his 20s isnt his problem or rcgs bc their writing doesnt suck ass like most of yalls 👍

nobody gets it nobody understands

[crazygaysex]

incomprehensible conjecture and rambling about sunny/rcg under the cut! idk man I got 1 hour of sleep in the past 24 or wataver and my brain is an abandoned swamp Good Nigte

i certainly am not arguing that mac Absolutely Isnt a stereotype of a predatory gay man/self-hating homophobe or whatevr. i wont argue the homophobe one at all really,not great even if they rectified it and further tried to make up for it or whatever w mac finds his pride (which i love, regardless). but honestly i dont think the predatory complaint really makes a whole lot of legitimate sense considering every charatcer on the show is Extremely predatory in their own right. if he wasnt i’d be irritated to be honest. i do agree w wat mcelhenney said something like that its cool that they decided to acknowledge he was gay without changing him fundamentally as a person; he still needs to fit into the show or watever. like idk he’s not Ideal Gay Rep ofc but he’s awesome still. To Me. I like when character’s sexuality can be an improtant acknowledged facet of them but doesnt overtake the rest of te narrative! It never occurred to me that his behavior toward dennis would be seen as predatory ina stereotypical way seeing as how their relationship dynamic is so fckign bizarre. charlie has the same level of dogged cluelessness about the obj of his affection’s true feelings, so it didnt occur to me to see mac touching dennis’ knee or stuff of that variety as being any different ig or as making fun of queers or watevr. if i am wrong/misunderstanding i apologize. i have never considered mac from that perspective before.

honestly i kinda get the complaints. i’ve never rly thought rcg all have 10000% pure intentions with the insensitive kind of humor they are into, no matter their loophole justifications for shit. sometimes i almost believe their reasoning and do basically understand but it still seems flimsy when you considers stuff like the blackface stuff which is indeed kind of funny at times mainly bc the joke is the absurdity of it all, like mac in the shower with the brown dripping off him like he’s melting; it’s not funny at the expense of black ppl but more so at the expense of how goddam stupid and unaware mac is. i havent seen the blackface/brownface ones in years sos i dont have a whole lot to say excepe they seemed to be clearly against using blackface as the moral while still using it to get laughs. so. really honestly i don’t know that it’s Liderally Ever edgy white people’s call to use something like blackface regardless of context, regardless of their obvious intent? i dunno i have tried to find Black ppls opinions online a couple times but struggled to find any tangible results. the only other thing i have to say with ym white person words is that i think it’s stupid that the streamig companies take down all insensitive episodes like theyre trying to brush them under the rug and pretend it never happened in wake of a changing political climate. i get it, but kinda just seems like corporate scrambling ie disney getting ridof all of song of the south but still profiting from splash mountain eprhaps. something seems dodgy to me about pretending it doesnt exist anymore just to cover their asses. i understand the sentiment i guess but i dont think that’s really the main goal of the BLM movement, to purge streaming services of any questionable/racially insensitive/Fully Racist material; there’s surely more important things at the top of the lists besids Good Branding . im not sure if that makes sense

also a lot of episodes the joke is the blatant but somehow woefully oblivious homoerotic overtones present between the guys, like a Lot of the time. it is very funny though is the thing and a lot of thm are my favorites. i dunno. i also thought hte pooping transgender bit was pretty funny mainly cause it was absurd. i think maybe because i have my own what i think are reaosnable and empathetic views about certain stuff like queer shit it doesnt necessarily occur to me that they are trying to make fun of queer people.. like people make fun of conservative fans for having completely missed the point of it all being satire, and wat if i am being tricked to into assuming rcg has kind intentions and isnt trying to make fun of queer people just cause the thought didnt occur to me? instead of taking all the gay subtext serious- WHICh i Do, i should probably be more aware that to rcg it is just a bit and not really that deep. but mac and dennis were totally fucjing in s5 canonically. anwyays like aside from the carmen shit which is handled So Fuckign Bad and it makes me so upset cause i actually love carmen they were just very clearly not bothered with actually representing trans people accurately. so in the bathroom one if even fuckin dee reynolds is like, saying a trans woman in a woman’s bathroom is obviously normal.. it seems like they’d rectified some of their previous Very flawed rhetoric surrounding trans women (ie the whole “u slept with me when i was still a man” line. makes me cringe a bit ebery time)u get wat i mean?? not that it atones for it obviously. i love carmen she desreved better

butreallt i dont have any like. Pure Faith in rcg to be super accountable or honest about their intentions or to have the most accurate or agreeable beliefs or whataver. theyre just fucking about really because they can without any lashback. and people i think like being able to laugh at offensive shit thru scenarios which supposedly distance you from bigots/evil people and make u feel better about yourself watching these dumbass evil people talk slime. when like. glenn yelling supposedly arabic-sounding gibberish for example: it is funny in this context not just cause it’s wildly inappropriate and absurd but also because there’s prob significant amt of people who actually dont have an issue with it who could watch it and not have that takeaway whatsoever. i dont kno wt im talking about anymore btu honestly if youre trying to watch a show that isnt rife throughout with controversial/offensive/insensitive language and story beats, i dont know why you would try to stomach it with sunny. like for gods sake they used blackface more than once! i dunno man

[smalltragedy]

* ryan destiny, cis woman + she/her | you know kira blake, right? they’re twenty four, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, ever? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to babooshka by kate bush like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole lazily stretched out in a ray of light, daisy shaped irises and daisy chain braids, performing an intricate dance to move the ocean's waves thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is october 31st, so they’re a scorpio, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( james, 22, est, they/them )

hllo ive hd kira in my head fr a bit bt i also know ntohing abt her! this is me winging it even though i hv no right to <3 this is my third character maybe whose birthday is in honor of ella n coincidentally 2/3 of them r in this rp. yea im messy smirks sexily.

DEATH, GRIEF, DRUGS TW

mini playlist.

wuthering heights ;; kate bush / babooskha ;; kate bush / dreams ;; fleetwood mac / california dreamin’ ;; the mamas & the papas / lavender moon ;; haroula rose / time of the season ;; the zombies / after the storm ;; kali uchis / left hand free ;; alt-j / always forever ;; cults / wait a minute! ;; willow / your dog ;; soccer mommy.

statistics.

full name: kira blake

nickname(s): keely.

birthday: october 31st, 1996.

zodiac: scorpio sun, cancer moon, aquarius ascending. 

mbti & temperament: esfp & catalyst / sanguine. 

label: the ebullient.

sexuality: bisexual.

pinterest.

biography.

born to two original hippies which hs pretty much set up who kira is fr the rest of her life <3 the type of ppl who didnt like the boundaries of marriage n held off frm it fr as long as possible until theyd hd a spur of the moment elopement involving a celebrity impersonator at fannie’s <3 yea theyre lesbians lets go <3

nvr rly took things srsly until kira ws like 5 yrs old n then they were like ah gee ah fuck we probably shld probably settle settle. n they job hopped n worked many odd jobs until they found their footing in careers they liked n one of them probably does like. blown glass art. n the other prob fixes old computers n other ~vintage~ mementos of the past fr ppl.

they make a decent living n they live in delpinius heights n they try a few times fr another kid bt it nvr rly works out (raises an eyebrow. adopted siblings anyone?) n fr the most part kira as a child spends her time running around town and tugging on the hem of other’s shirts to ask them small favors (mostly to play a game with her)

often left unsupervised as a kid, bt not in the way tht her parents dnt care (bc her parents love her a lot a lot a lot like she is their world) bt in the way tht they simply raised her the way they were raised. running amuck all day n coming home jst in time fr dinner, front porch light always on, cat always waiting faithfully on their stoop.

pretty evident frm a young age tht kira’s mind saw things differently, in a different light - the world an array of light n mystery n sound n taste n sometimes those collided n created new experiences. prob hs some form of synsthesia bt dnt ask me which one yet. she’s a painting prodigy with an excellent understanding of color theory.

always ws known as a kind of like. rambunctious kid. a well meaning class clown who cld nt keep her mouth shut fr the life of her. grew up constantly with a yellow card beneath her name in school bt ws always well liked by her teachers n classmates alike.

jst a very bright child who did well naturally bt always ws turned more towards art.

feel like her parents very noticeably turned a cheek when she started smoking weed w the cool older kids when she ws 13. the type of person who wnts 2 b liked so bad she’d jump over a hurdle fr it. hs jumped over many hurdles n many fences n many other obstacles to be liked bt does it without breaking a sweat.

(edit: nw tht i think abt it hwevr i dnt think she does tht anymore i think while a bit of a mess atm she. likes herself. n doesnt rly want or need the approval of others anymore she jst does her own little thing. bt when she ws younger? she jst wnted 2 b friends w the entire world.)

nothing bad rly happened fr like. a good bit of her life. got into psychedelics at some point in high school n tht only heightened her artistic abilities. most of her high school art portfolio ws probably done while high bt <3 does it matter.

hd a high school sweetheart n they were pretty serious like. full on in love. a total believer of soulmates kira ws jst like. this is the one. there is nobody else i cn imagine my life with.

death tw

death tw

death tw.

death n grief tw // yea. sometime during their freshmen year of college. car incident. kira ws nvr the same though she’d like to pretend tht nothing’d ever happened. like theyd nvr existed. like she didnt plan out their entire lives together hiking thru hills n valleys n boating across various bodies of water n traveling together until they were old n wrinkly. end of death tw //

cld nt explain 2 u why kira hd bought a van n completely demolished it only to drain all of her savings remodeling it bt nw she lives in it by the beach. hd dreams of travelling the world bt cannot go long distances in a car without feeling sick. sees planes n feels envy. stopped painting fr a long time bt she’s started back up recently. took on surfing. told her parents tht it ws fine n tht she ws fine n theyre concerned bt shes always by the beach, her van rarely leaves. she’s trying her best bt its only been a few yrs n i think ppl cn sense tht shes jst nt the same cheerful girl as they once knew. end of grief tw //

anyways. tugs on my collar. tht’s kira! she lives on the beach n surfs everyday n is obsessed with daisies n is prob growing her own shrooms somewhere. 

personality & facts.

always been very emotional n a little dramatic. nt a drama queen bt is a little messy n does not hv like. many rational thoughts up in there. very cup full or cup empty.

regardless though she hs an. overall reputation fr jst being. enjoyable to be around. her her little moments bt shes also pretty like. laidback. in a way. KDSHFSDLKHGHFLKSD

prob bc she smokes a lot or is often <3 on a trip if u know wht i mean <3

god. got obsessed with the 60s n 70s aesthetic at some point n hs not gone back evr. big fan of psychedelic rock. is a prodigy painter bt her life dream outside of traveling ws always to own her own record label. hs nt happened yet, maybe will never happen? works at a record shop though n does hide the good vinyls tht she wants away frm the customers.

very cheerful n usually uplifting n she doesnt like to b negative around others bt smtms she cnt control it n smtms thinks tht ppl r out 2 get her jst out of. anxiety. hs long bouts where she’ll sit in a still sort of sadness n then shake out of it n hop back into conversation like nothing’s happened bt. its fine we’re fine kira is fine.

shes not gullible or naive bt wants to believe tht everybody hs a heart of gold even if its false. keeps giving ppl second chances bc she hs a savior complex n thinks she cn change ppl.

is very into zodiac n will judge u by ur chart. knows everybody in town’s natal chart. even newcomers. it’s a little scary hw quick she finds this information bt its very important to her.

kind of like. into spirituality bt i wont lie its very surface level n a little superficial. learning tarot cards bt cannot fr the life of her memorize the meanings so smtms she jst makes up things on the spot. hs so many crystals she will not stop buying them.

i think a part of her is desperately trying to cling onto tht like. think positive. self care. msg thts super prevalent online without addressing or actually helping any of her problems. it is her flaw </3

hates to admit when she needs help. wld rather do everything herself.

head is a little in the clouds n her parents r a little concerned fr her bc shes nt rly doing much rn bt like. she jst needs time i think. shes jst doing her little thing.

does not give up on ppl easily she absolutely hates dropping ppl frm her life even if she grows 2 resent them over time which is bad bc she is bad at hiding when she is upset at someone or when she doesnt like someone.

like shes jst passive aggressive abt it n does not properly communicate <3

bt this is rare i think ... negative feelings abt other ppl

self centered bt not selfish if tht makes sense. she will do things fr others without a problem n sometimes trips over herself 2 do it bt at the end of the day i think she cares abt herself the most.

hs only been in love once bt hs hd many infatuations n many like. admirations n very surface level feelings. her body is a temple n she loves 2 b worshipped.

prob does fkn. beach yoga. probably vegan bt also maybe breaks tht every once in a while. almost noncommittal its hard 2 distinguish between her being carefree, not taking care of herself, or jst hving commitment issues? flaky or not? who knows.

feels jst a bit too strongly bt tries to contain it. jst full of multitudes or smth. idk. icon <3

like. cares bt doesnt care. does thinks tht r purposely self destructive n then acts like shes like. cool girl monologue frm gone girl. bt does it while being like peace n luv on earth x

ok thts all i hv goodbye

wanted plots.

a pseudonym 2 fool ‘em... ;; jst hd this idea pop up bt i like the idea of kira going undercover 2 expose cheaters. whether she does this on her own accord or is personally requested by smbdy is up in the air. a plottable point. she h8s cheaters n is chaotic good she prob thinks shes the relationship vigilante testing the strengths of other’s relationships. once again she cld b. specifically going undercover fr smbdy 2 help them out. im sure she wldnt go 2 very. extensive srs measures like actually. sleeping w the assumed-cheaters bt once again. world is our oyster n i lov drama?

crystal visions ... ;; once again. shes super into crystals n astrology n she will base sm of her opinions of others on it. this is nt just abt her being judgmental of others bt also jst. catching her running around in the rain trying sooo hard 2 fkn. charge her crystals in the rainwater bc she forgot 2 charge them under the full moon the night b4. this is her giving wrong tarot readings. she hs no idea wht shes doing at any given time bt acts like she does know. acts like she knows the entire world. she gives crystals as gifts n will do ur natal chart for u bt will also pack her things n leave if ur a capricorn.

time of the season... ;; i dnt knw admittedly. this song’s abt being horny so perhaps? perhaps. kira isnt rly able to keep a grasp on long term relationships rn due to. factors in her life so she hops frm person 2 person often. smtms jst flings smtms its jst a relationship accidentally led on. shes noncommittal n a little flaky atm when she’s usually ride or die fr others. perhaps this is all in the name of some good fun! world? oyster. 

literally anything .dsfskhdkgs ;; god. shes so new i jst dnt know. childhood friends. current friends. friends shes hd frever. enemies n ex lovers n ppl shes constantly pushing away or scorned lovers or both or anything?? she pushed them out of the roller rink to make more room fr herself or maybe they did tht to her. perhaps theyre both constantly pursuing some sort of fkn. meaning in their lives tht they cnt quite grasp. mayb they go on an acid trip together. who knows. 

[brinesystem]

list, tw

I saw this on someone else’s blog (im not saying names cause idk if its okay to share that info? it was public but still) and it uh

It looked like a good way to kinda, like, have a bit less doubt? or a way to remind myself of whats happening and why i think i have this? idk

Might be triggering so like probs scroll past or something

‘the moods’ existed before i knew about did/osdd

I used to describe them as “it feels like half me, but also half somebody else”

I argue and talk with my own thoughts

Sometimes I talk/argue /aloud/ with my own thoughts

I have to actively fight to /convince/ Fae to talk to people, else he wont. and even when he does, its not how i want it to sound

I cant remember most of my childhood

The /bad/ middle school was when i was either 9 or 10

I knew too much about sex when i was much too young (7, 8)

I get ages wrong (i was 6 in cali, not 8. why do i think it was 8?)

I had a dream about getting raped when I was in elementary school. I didnt fight back. I didnt feel anything at all

I used to hide under desks

I hated my therapist. Its now fear. I dont remember what it was back then

I forget memories I recall, and if I force them back, everything hurts, even if theyre not traumatic

I often forget that I used to forget bad things that happened to me.

Other sex dreams from elementary school

The csa I /do/ remember (freshman). Why did i seek that out. Why did it seem like a good plan

I used to forget conversations daily

I drew myself (sebastian, older brother, nicer) before I knew i was trans. I dont have many memories from before I came out/knew i was trans. (am i an alter?)

Used to daydream for hours due to nerves. Disocciating?

The bathroom incident (middle school. 9 - 10)

How old are you? “16″ i reply this randomly when i am 23. when i was 21. Even when I know I am not

The HS trauma that happened right

I don’t have triggers for my trauma, except sometimes i /do/

Hypersexual, but only /sometimes/

I’m an adult! Except sometimes when my body is much too big and I am much too tall and I only want to curl up and be left /alone/. Except when i am small and fragile and want to have stuffed animals around me and play animal crossing. Except then.

Opinions keep changing, but to set differing ones. (Fashion sense, humor, hobbies, aesthetics)

Scared of dad! Not scared of dad. Pity dad. Could kill dad. Scared of dad! Not s-

Handwriting/Art/Writing style changes a lot (fluctuates between set stops)

Randomly gains accents and loses them. Only happens with two accents even though I know many

Stims change depending on Mood

Cant recognize myself in the mirror, but ideal keeps changing in set patterns (soft lumberjack, fae prince, cutesy, fashionable andro, suited devil)

Fave colors, songs, movies change in set patterns

Numb sensations to VERY INTENSE sensations. Cannot predict

Edible food changes depending on mood, even including safe foods (mac n cheese vs mussels vs ramen, etc)

What is this emotion? idk

Who am i? idk

I know I was bullied. Don’t remember why I know

Trying to think about my childhood makes me panic or get a headache

Super depressed after mental break ; Suddenly snapped out of it emotionally

That one time I slept for 3 days straight

Posture and walk cycle keeps changing

Gets songs stuck in my head that I’m not thinking about

Gets songs stuck in my head that i can’t even hear

Remembers things with no context given (the movie. “which movie” i dont know. “what was it about? who was in it? what was the title? what did it look like?” i dont know)

Bad sense of time, but like, days/hours can = months/years

“so mature for my age”

The Moods can be triggered into appearing, but not always by things I relate to them (ie; Kos and Fae)

Personality test results keep changing. All of them

False memories (the cliff, talking to the old woman about marriage, who knows what else)

Caught off guard by my own thoughts and even words I say (”sehb is gonna be mad at me for this, lol” “ACRRRRRYLICS”)

Most of my childhood memories are actually photos or stories ive heard

That dissociative test where I scored in the middle, but closer to DID than OSDD

Opinion on myself and my own looks varies

Opinion on my past varies

I dont recognize my own voice sometimes (is it changing? or is it my perception?)

Numb regarding pain, but then hypersensitive to it later

Numb regarding loss, skips straight to acceptance

Cant shiver normally, but sometimes can even when its not cold

Cant feel hunger normally, but sometimes can?

Favorite season and holidays change (summer, beach! autumn, cool air! halloween! no, valentines day!)

I dont feel connected to my family except my mum and maybe my youngest sister. These were /choices/ I made

Empathy? Dont know her. Except when I randomly start crying when others are sad, which always comes at different times but similar Moods

Cares about appearance one day, couldnt care less the next

Fave jacket: Green denim! Nope, today fave jacket: Grey hoodie! Nope, today f-

Headaches. So many headaches

More headaches when dealing with trauma

I doubt myself and worry I’m lying. Liars wouldnt do that, right?

Known to dissociate

Forget things mid sentence

Used ‘we’ when talking about myself at random before considering OSDD

Cant dream, except when I can and they dont feel like /mine/

Used to speak aloud with myself practicing words. Was I alone? idk

Loves animals. One of the Moods doesnt care at all about animals, even Wander

Loves video games. One of the moods detests video games

Loves horror games. Randomly feels intense fear from horror games

I know i was bullied, i know dad didnt come home on xmas, i know i moved a lot, i know i was in dc during 9/11, the ocean incident, the doctor incidents, I vaguely recall M(on base friend with older brother) and how she treated me (broke my glasses), i know i had a horrible time during that one year of middle school even though I only remember Two Moments (bathrooms, trailer) but I don’t necessarily have the memories of all of the things I know I dealt with

Memories are like snapshots or still moments, and dont continue

Memories I know effected me emotionally, I feel detached from now, except when i’m randomly Not (the koi, the caterpillar, not punching dad, etc)

Didn’t have friends until second year of middle school, those friends were bad, so were the hs friends

Ignored most things that happened but would randomly become enraged at smaller things that happened to me

The time on base I thought all adults driving by were pedophiles (i was 7. 8. why did i think that. why did i want to goad them? what was wrong with me??)

Keep forgetting memories like 81, but when I remember them theyre hard to get out of my head

“you acted so differently as a kid, what happened”

The Tics in response to stress

Was good at the doctors and then suddenly wasnt at all. Now am afraid

Was fine with bugs and then suddenly wasnt. Now am afraid

The fact that I dont remember typing ‘at all’ on 85

Lost old friend. Didnt mourn, still get a queasy feeling when I think about her/am reminded of her, but not upset or sad usually

Can connect most of the Moods to triggers, traumas, or coping methods, including myself

Reaction to trauma changed literally overnight

Used to love being tickled, now makes me panic (fight/flight)

Can feel when the Moods take something they see into themselves (was told this is normal. i am not faking this, at the very least)

I dont like lying. Fae doesnt/cant lie. Luci /enjoys/ lying.

Used to think solely in images. Now think solely in words.

Can sometimes hear thoughts before i think them, but only my own

Randomly gets worse coordination in turns with moods, and then gains it back after

Too trusting, but then gets in a mood and doubts even my closest friends

People keep telling me what im describing sounds like osdd, even friends who have met some of the Moods

I have an easier time remembering some things when I’m in different Moods

Used to have more amnesia before I started recognizing the Moods (was that me switching out?)

[thesims4blogger]

SimGuruKate Addresses Concerns on Alexa Skill Device

After the Sims team revealed skills on the Alexa device during Maxis Monthly live stream on twitch, the community took to social media to express their disappointment. Yesterday, SimGuruKate address these concerns on the official forums.

Ok there are a few things I want to comment on, address, clarify from this thread. First, the comment that the Alexa Skill was developed in partnership with Amazon and that it was paid/sponsored. This is 110% not true. If something is paid or sponsored we legally must disclose that. Amazon did not reach out to us to develop this, nor did we reach out to Amazon to see if they wanted to partner with us. Instead, a single Dev thought of this idea and worked with a few other Devs who were interested to bring it to life and create it outside of their TS4 development responsibilities. Second, the idea that if they had not worked on this new Alexa Skill we would have released a patch in January for TS4 PC/Mac or Console. There was never a patch in January scheduled. Had the Alexa Skill not been in development or on the docket for release this month we still would not have released a patch in January. There are many reasons for this, much of it to do with how our development schedule is laid out, other content we are currently working on (paid and free), and the fact that we (EA) actually shut down the entire office (globally) between Christmas and New Years. Patches are scheduled VERY far in advance (we are talking months) and are done so in a manner that align with the overall development schedule for the year. Third, this sentiment that the Dev Team should remain chained to their desks and only work on in game content, and that passion projects are a waste of time. The Maxis Dev Team is one of the hardest working teams out there, and they are incredibly passionate about TS4, TSM, TSFP, and all past and future projects. One of the coolest things about Maxis is that they actively encourage Devs to work on side projects outside of their time required for primary project development (such as a patch or pack). By providing this opportunity it allows them to remain engaged and excited for what they are working on, thus preventing burnout (which as many know is a very real thing). All of this means that they can continue to create high quality content for the games you are so passionate about. Sometimes a Dev's passion project is something like First Person Camera. Sometimes it's something like a new career or NPC in the game. And yes, sometimes it's creating a fun little Alexa skill for those who have an Alexa and love The Sims. For passion projects Devs are encouraged to work on things they find interesting because when you work on things you enjoy it means you will produce high quality results. Now, Maxis Monthly. When we first announced Maxis Monthly I stated that not every Maxis Monthly would include revealing new content for TS4 (or TSM or TSFP). I also made it very clear from the first Maxis Monthly that new PAID content (that means EPs/GPs/SPs) would not be announced during these streams. There are multiple reasons for this, but basically it comes down to the way we announce new paid content. Now that being said, the goal of Maxis Monthly was to talk ALL things Maxis. This means that sometimes we would have something new to show for every single current game in our portfolio, and sometimes (like this month) we would have nothing. This is simply the nature of how game development works. It's pure luck (or coincidence) that prior to yesterday every Maxis Monthly had included new content reveals for TS4. Yes, I know this meant the community had come to expect certain things in the streams. Yes, I knew that the first MM in which we didn't reveal new content for TS4 would result in dissatisfaction. Though some many not think so, I know this community VERY well. That's why, compared to previous MM, we did not hype this live stream. That's why I called what we were showing "nifty" instead of mind blowing. That's why I sent out gentle reminders to the community that not all streams would show off new in-game content. Short of saying "this is what you will be seeing" I could not have been more clear and forthcoming that the January MM would not be showing off new TS4 content. However all that being said, the level of vitriol seen during yesterday's announcement was beyond what even I expected, and to be honest, was beyond what was appropriate. Do I think it would have been better to not show off Alexa during the stream? Absolutely not. That stream was the perfect place to show off this cool new product. Yes, we could have immediately said up front at the top of the stream that it was not sponsored/paid, and that was a huge learning lesson. So knowing some of the community wouldn't be happy with no new content coming for TS4, why didn't I wait to share Alexa? Because it's coming out next week and the Devs who worked on it wanted to show it off and this was the right time and way to do so. But why didn't I talk about things coming later this year? Because I can't. My hands are literally tied. Due to some interesting legal reasons (it's pretty in depth and complicated) revealing content too early would result in us being in some legal and financial hot water. Additionally doing so would not only result in me likely losing my job, but could put our Development and Marketing Teams in very difficult positions. And remember, though at this point I sound like a broken record, just because we don't explicitly share what the team is working on at the moment (because we can't), doesn't mean we aren't working on multiple packs, free content, and more. We will continue to evaluate how we approach content announcements and whether or not the Maxis Monthly adds value for enough individuals and make changes where/if necessary. Now the final thing I want to address is that passion and frustration never excuses basic human decency in how you interact with others. While everyone, especially a consumer of a product, has a right to express frustration, or be critical of the product, this does not give them the right to hurl insults at the Developers (or creator of the product). And if a person does choose to engage this way (which free will and freedom of speech allows) the individual which they are directing it at is under no obligation to listen or engage with that individual (because free will and all). It does not matter if that person is a Developer, a Customer Service person, or yes, a Community Manager. Yes, we choose these careers, and yes some of us even put ourselves in the public eye, but that does not mean we have to tolerate individuals spewing hate or vitriol. There are many appropriate ways to provide criticism or share your opinion in a way that does not include excessive ongoing negativity or insults. Appropriate: I have zero interest in this new Alexa Skill they announced and I wish it had been something different. I feel they could have used their time differently or developed something different. Unnecessary: This Alexa Skill is so stupid, why are they wasting their time on this? They are so stupid and this is pointless and they never listen to us and the game is doomed. I have seen a number who have stated their thoughts in the first way, but have seen far more communicating in the second manner. And even with the first way of sharing your thoughts, we often wont reply. And not because we don't see it or only want positive feedback, but because not every message needs a response. Oftentimes there is almost nothing one could say to either of the above that would add value or make the individual happy or satisfied. So many times in these situations it is better to say nothing at all. We gather the feedback and we pass it onto those who can impact change. I hope this has helped provide more clarity or insight. Remember, I dont expect every individual to like every single thing that we do, or even like me or the Devs. That's absolutely ok and to be expected. One of the best things (but sometimes the hardest thing to handle) about The Sims community is how varied it is. This is an incredibly diverse community and there are so many different ways to enjoy The Sims. But what I do expect is for people to be respectful.Post edited by SimGuruKate on January 9

[catalinacaraway-blog]

A Script To ConvertFlac ToMp3 W

FLAC stands for Free Lossless Audio Codec, an audio format just like MP3, but lossless, that means that audio is compressed in FLAC with none loss in quality. This group of formats records and compresses a sound in such a way as to permit preserving its precise original quality when decoding. The Tutorial presented here is obvious and really effectively completed, but for many who do not want to waste the time required for such an in depth instruction, I suggest Format Manufacturing facility, which is a free software, requiring just 2 or three clicks to function. It sounds like you've had some actually heated conversations with pretentious individuals, though, flac to mpc online sound converter I can't be certain how a lot that has coloured your opinion right here. There are vital elements that must be considered earlier than making blanket judgements in regards to the subjective quality of audio. Audio source quality, the type of music, increased availability and affordability of decent audio tools, personal listening to means ( hearing loss and many others,) and the standard of audio an individual is used to listening to. I've been accumulating numerous music tracks and OST's for some time. It is just last week that I downloaded some FLAC files that always used for preserving higher high quality. It's the first time that I encounter this type of file format and I am hesitant to play it, and when finally I do a pop out appeared telling me that the audio file is not supported. This additionally offers me an indication that it's practically impossible to play these information on different units, too. Can anybody help me discover a technique to convert FLAC to MP3? So that I could make use of the audio tracks that I've not too long ago downloaded. Any help from you is deeply appreciated. When you have an AMR file you need to open with an iPhone or different cellular device, convert it to a extra common audio format like MP3 using any of the converter packages we examined. As a result of AMR is a compressed audio format, you do not threat shedding constancy once you convert it to another lossy format. Nonetheless, don't count on the audio high quality to improve while you convert the file. For those who only have to convert a small variety of recordsdata which are less than one minute lengthy, we recommend a free program like Freemake Nevertheless, if you have multiple files that you want to convert and edit, we propose utilizing a more sturdy converter like Change or Audials as a result of they are considerably faster and make it simpler to batch convert a number of recordsdata at once. The perfect for-pay audio conversion software we tested additionally consists of simple enhancing instruments you employ to trim unwanted pauses and portions of the recording you don't need. To transform songs at the moment in your iTunes library, open the software program and discover the Preferences menu from the iTunes dropdown on a Mac or Edit dropdown on a Home windows laptop. Subsequent, click on the General tab, then discover the Import Settings in the lower part of the Preferences window. After that, http://www.audio-Transcoder.com click the dropdown next to Import Utilizing, select the format and click on OK to save that import format because the default setting. iTunes allows for batch changing, so the ultimate step is to pick out all the information you need to convert, click on the File menu, then select Convert and click on on Create MP3 Version. If you selected a different output format, it shows that format reasonably than MP3. I am actually making an attempt to playflac on iTunes to see if it wil assist multichannel rips from DTS or DVD-A. I do know you can play multichannel DTS rips ->alac on your ATV4 however I really want this to work with iTunes but I think the problem isn't just with the format, but a limitation with iTunes. Contemplating that it helps different surround formats passthrough like PCM it would not make sense to pay the licensing to be used on AppleTV but completely neglect iTunes for practically 20 years now. Equally, it's absurd that Apple still wont supportflac, a free format, presumably as a result of they need people usingalac becaus thats so bloody essential…flac is nice because it is a absolutely taggable format that performs on all platforms- except iTunes! Apple's deliberate only sport in town" schtick is de facto getting old. I then took my three flacs which were a number of track (in actual fact every was a CD recorded as one file). Audacity has a ‘detect silence' possibility which did a reasonably good job of detecting the begins of the various tracks. I had to change a number of, take away some spurious ones, and add one right firstly in two cases. I then advised audacity to export, splitting at markers. I now have particular person tracks in mp3 format. Freemake Audio Converter is far from the only Windows software The Mega Guide to Media File Conversion Instruments in Windows The Mega Information to Media File Conversion Tools in Home windows Questioning how one can best convert that media file? That is your information out of the media file jungle. We compiled the most relevant media file conversion instruments and show you easy methods to use them. Read Extra for this job, nevertheless it performs admirably, making it our primary decide. As soon as you've installed it, click the blue + Audio button within the high-left nook so as to add tracks. You possibly can choose a single track for one-off conversion, or add a complete folder for converting en masse.

SoundConverter aims to be easy to make use of, and really fast. Because of its multithreaded design, it would use as many cores as potential to hurry up the conversion. It could possibly also extract the audio from videos. is a free FLAC to MP3 converter on-line that has very good capabilities. The tool affords the conversion of a number of file formats with instant execution. The location can also be legit with a smart design. It's easy to make use of and supports each audio and video conversions. One can batch convert the information too.FLAC To MP3 Converter is a small software program product converts FLAC audio recordsdata to MP3 music shortly. You possibly can drag and drop FLAC files onto the program then simply click the Begin Changing button to start the conversion. All of the FLAC audio will likely be transformed to MP3 music within a couple of minutes, and keep the very best high quality. There are some choices that permit you to set the output MP3 bit price, price, and audio channel.

[alonzojaques-blog]

→Convertir Un Formato De Archivo Audio Gratuitamente Mp3 Wav Ogg Amr Flac Aac Mp4 M4a

Methods to convert FLAC to AIFF on-line with FLAC to AIFF Converter? Click Add File" button to add your supply information to the Mac AIFF Converter. Freemake has a restricted variety of export formats, and it's gradual. Nevertheless, the user interface is easy to navigate and you can obtain the full version at no cost. With Windows techniques, these codecs require Apple Quicktime to work with Stay, which is only available as a 32-bit utility. On Mac methods, these formats work with Live as if they had been natively supported. Lossless files owe rather a lot to the specifications of the conversion course of, as well as the conversion software program and different factors. If you look lengthy sufficient, you might be certain to search out some FLACs that blow away an ALAC, and vice versa. For all sensible functions, when the extenuating circumstances cancel out, FLAC and ALAC run neck and neck, both in audio high quality and file measurement. Though MP3 is the most typical audio file available on the market, there are various other codecs available together with FLAC, ALAC, WMA, and AIFF, to call a few. With that in thoughts, many individuals get confused on the subject of choosing a file format that will give them the perfect listening experience. That is as a result of most people do not understand the distinction between all these formats, especially flac vs aiff. Scott Brown's X Audio Compression Toolkit (aka xACT) 1.sixty four can convert SHN, FLAC, Monkey's Audio, and other information into WAV or AIFF information—after which you should convert them to a different format (unless you intend to use the uncompressed information). To transform them additional, add the recordsdata to your iTunes library, select them, then select Advanced: Convert Choice to yourselectedfileformat. xACT also can encode FLAC, SHN, Monkey's Audio, and WavPack files from your CDs. It might even encode MP3 information utilizing the open-supply LAME MP3 encoder. This page is about importing audio files into Audacity (like WAV or MP3) that other functions on the computer can play. As well as, with FLAC to Apple Lossless Converter, you may merge, trim, split FLAC audio information, alter audio high quality to customize output audio and extra. 1-bit formats maximal value is -6 dB restricted. It's DSD modulator's stability points. Auto degree normalizing amplify (or scale back in some cases) loudness of all tracks so maximal peak level of full converted album is zero dB. If you want to compress videos , FonePaw Video Converter Ultimate may enable you. are you able to see the information in foobar, and play them? if so you should be capable of proper click on and see the convert option. is the free on-line video and audio converter. You just need open its web site, , in your browser on Mac, and load your FLAC audio file to make the changing. However when you have non-public FLAC file that you wish to convert, we advise you had higher take care.

The sound high quality of music within the MQA format is equal to the FLAC format when played again on the pc. Click the "Convert" button to button to begin and finish the AIFF to FLAC format conversion. Simply storing files; then I might say it goes to FLAC because it makes use of less area. Playback; I'd go together with AIFF. Something that has bothered me for a really very long time is my lack of ability to play FLAC audio files on my Mac. (FLAC stands for Free Lossless Audio Codec and does not play in iTunes.) Nicely, I've finally gotten it found out. Simply follow these simple steps. I am truly making an attempt to playflac on iTunes to see if it wil assist multichannel rips from DTS or DVD-A. I know which you can play multichannel DTS rips ->alac in your ATV4 however I really need this to work with iTunes but I think the problem isn't simply with the format, but a limitation with iTunes. Considering that it supports different surround formats passthrough like PCM it doesn't make sense to pay the licensing for use on AppleTV however completely neglect iTunes for almost two decades now. Similarly, it is absurd that Apple still wont supportflac, a free format, presumably because they need people usingalac becaus thats so bloody important…flac is great as a result of it's a totally taggable format that performs on all platforms- except iTunes! Apple's deliberate solely game on the town" schtick is de facto getting old. In my very own personal listening tests, corroborated by many others' opinion, when music is encoded on the same bit charge to MP3, AAC, and Ogg Vorbis formats, the AAC and Ogg Vorbis files do sound barely however noticeably higher than the MP3s. There's a distinction in the fullness of the sound and the bass in the AAC and Ogg Vorbis files. Mp3tag v2.89 — This version adds a brand new structure and configuration options for the Tag Panel, adds assist for lengthy file paths (> 260 characters), and updates the Discogs and http://www.audio-transcoder.com/ MusicBrainz tag sources. We've targeted on the most important and most popular UK obtain websites that let you purchase and obtain single tracks and full albums in various hello-res codecs. Every has its personal distinct flavour, bitrates and flac videos to aiff converter online options to offer.

[mortal-by-nature]

Ambrose Vibes

Stuff to chill to in the Louisiana heat, straight vibin’, stuff to do chores to, stuff to yearn to (aka classic rock and stuff that betrays my taste in music)

·         Rules I used :

If its country it cant be dry/dusty country, it has to feel swampy or hazy.

Has to have that sad tone I’m looking for, touch of yearning.

 Aka me going through the endless playlists I have for every genre/mood imaginable and finding songs about these losers and endless yearning

Some of these are background soundtrack and some of these are just things I think the Sinclair’s would have in their music deck

THESE ARE JUST OPINIONS, DONT TAKE TOO SERIOUSLY

Im searching for more metal/rock/punk music as well so send me some recs that I may add to the list, it will be periodically updated. I also have another list of music that plays when bad sh*t goes down in Ambrose

Fleetwood Mac - Rhiannon

Fleetwood Mac - The Chain

Fleetwood Mac - Gold Dust Woman

Fleetwood Mac - Dreams

Blue Oyster Cult - (Don't Fear) The Reaper (Audio)

 Enjoying life in Ambrose

Dolly Parton – Jolene

Honestly just something the brothers have in their music collection. Bo thinks of you when he thinks of this song, its hardwired in his brain “my happiness depends on you, and whatever you decide to do”

The Crane Wives – Safe Ship, Harbored

The desperate yearning to leave Ambrose, being torn between the people you love and the need for change. The want to escape, tied to the want to take the brothers with you, knowing you can have neither.

Shawn James - Burn the Witch

You start off on the wrong side of either Bo or Vinnie, it works well for either of them.

Shawn James - The Curse of the Fold

First palpitations of love/interest, forgiveness vs crime.

Hozier – Run

It just is, I dunno how to explain. Any music about needing or running is going on this playlist, its just how it works.

America - Horse with No Name

The Crane Wives - Tongues & Teeth

This is Bo, its so Bo. Also you, very you it just depends on how angry you are about being in Ambrose.

Nat King Cole- Love Me As Though There Were No Tomorrow

Its just on their music deck, they avoid it like the plague because oldie love songs make them yearn a little too much, they live by the idea of if you don’t address a problem it wont bother you, so its hidden away unless you find it.

Metallica - Enter Sandman

Led Zeppelin – Stairway to Heaven

The Animals – House of the Rising Sun

The mamas and the papas – California Dreamin’

Its somewhere in the deck, just is. Lester never admits it but he actually likes this song, reminds him of being a little kid, being carried around by his parents when the twins weren’t there

Metallica

just any of their stuff tbh

The Oh Hellos - Where Is Your Rider, Pale White Horse

Finally getting used to life in Ambrose, finding the small wax figurines Vinny leaves for you. One of those rainy days where its still sunny and it seems to be washing all sin away and cleaning all the dusty places in between.

Blue Oyster Cult – Burnin’ for You

Queens of the Stone Age - Villains of Circumstance

Realization sinking in that you can never leave

Spitfire by the Prodigy

part of the actual soundtrack

Minerva by Deftones

part of the actual soundtrack

Rose Mountain by Screaming Females

[bluebirdzykaysies]

5.14 - day before momma leaves

Goddamnit I hate to admit it but I’m already thinking and crying like a baby in my head once my mom leaves me to go back home to sf. the feeling is mutual like melissa said cause she’ll probably be just as a wreck and all this time I’ve been spending with her, I’m cherishing even more. I’ve never felt like this and Victoria said the same thing; expecting that while I transition. But everyone needs to experience this. I DO, especially. I need the time away for a bit to miss them and I already miss those interactions with my brothers too of just lounging in the living room watching NBA games all night, or youtube videos like its judyslife or ustheduo.

Our lives have changed already and itll be so hard as I am bawling my eyes out, sitting in my newly mounted dining table my mom and I put together, facing outwards my window with the Chicago sun, beaming through at a whopping 54 degrees.

This is my life now, I will be on my own and making decisions on my own. Ive told a few folks that I’m sad yet annoyed my moms time here was a bit much. But I know it was perfect for what it is. We’ve been tired each and everytime, her actions speak volumes and our conversations arent as deep as I want, but I know this quality time was one that will impact my life forever. Even though I hate to admit it or will say this to her face. i love my mom. so much, she means so much to me and my brothers. The amount of things she does unselfishly aka drive my freaking car with just her and hector for 5 days cross country. do what she did to make me help settle, there is no one like her. and I will forever appreciate her and love her.

She is opinionated and still felt like I couldnt decide for myself but this will be also a time where I speak up and use my voice. Saying NO.

ugh the tears keep falling down but some highlights from this past week were:

- Silly vlog videos that I actually may put together when I get the time

- 5/6; arrived - went to container store to buy my elfa shelving for my closet. Super nice lady that worked there Hector spoke to. Went to world market to check out their furniture and standing mirrors. TJ Maxx/HomeGoods and picked up some bathroom essentials, shower curtain, mats and beddings, Facetimed Yan/Ronz/Brent+Rick at night (10pm CST) 

Mom stayed with Hector at Courtyard Marriot til Saturday 5/8. So I wanted to stay at the apartment for the first time alone and enjoy the moment and soak it all in. Parking at my garage alone, randomly waking up to the SUNRISE at 545am and just being in awe of my new city... I could just cry

Didn’t get my wifi set up yet so the struggle was real a bit. The air mattress we got from costco has been tough to sleep on but eventually Ill get my mattress. Just have been torn with my furniture not being here since everything was rushed and happened so quickly. Learnings from the move thus far:

-Write a damn list, I DID NOT. Aka thats why a bunch of junk and unnecessary things were with my mom and hector in the car. All couldve been bought here. I ocouldve taken more clothes and shoes

-Alot of my clothes aka my favorite jean jacket and pink/mauve henley was left at home. My running shoes - I decided not to prioritize idk fucking why *rolls eyes* and alot of my other valuables. Brendan is nice enough to ship it. Its not worth to buy a RT flight and go there and take it all back with me... no. :( I would though tbh if I was in LA. lol make couple trips but I’m far enough that its like.... whewww is it worth but one day I will come back and visit. For now, its slated for Oct

5/7 Friday; I had it off started the day late at 12pm and booked my mom, hector and myself tickets to the skydeck. my mom was HILARIOUS, she was scared at first and thought it would be a huge platform to see under but once she saw its just a small piece of glass over 105 floors, it wasnt THAT bad. Her and hector are hilarious together and annoying a little LOL. but I guess they’re cute

Went to Wrigley Field while there was a game and that was an experience. Fans at the top of their houses, Security all over the block, streets closed, fans everywhere. Its such a historical building in the middle of a freaking neighborhood so it made itself unique vs att/oracle park being so secluded down in mission bay.

RPM Steak for dinner in River North. Valet’d the car and Hector treated us to a Missouri Steak? it was bomb though but I wanted Medium and he wanted medium rare... cream of spinach, mac and cheese, asparagus and for dessert topped with a Baked Alaskan. Whatever that is. (It was good) and my first time trying it.. me and mom. Our waitor was a nice lady in her 30s, gave me tori kelly vibes. Then another worker stopped by our table who looked filipino for sure (Rox’s ex Dennis look a like) but I already for got his name. He told us how he lived in West Town too and would eat at this bomb restaurant called “Uncle Mikes” maybe the ‘superstar’ of chicago :) hectors jokes were a bit much saying climbing up the coconut tree and asking if he can make halo halo in the back for dessert. No sir....

5/8 Saturday; Plan was to visit Macys downtown to check out furniture at around 930am. But they werent open til 11am. We checked out the Bean at Millenium Park and my mom got to see all the tulips and flowers. We waited in line for a while at Stans Donuts since Wildberry was just too WILD and packed, so we walked a block down and had ourselves some coffee and donuts for the day. After we headed to Macys and were greeted by a tall man name Hilary. he’s THEEE BEST. he knew we didnt have to buy anything from him at macys but he’s such a sales guy and has been in this business for so long that he kept tlaking about Quality of furniture and making yourself feel comfy and at home. Being in a small apt, or living out alone for the first time, separating each section once winter hits so you’re not bored out of your mind in the small place. He was so friendly and nice, I took his business card. Went to Ashley’s on the way to the airport and got gas. Feel in love with the small dinette table they had but the one I’m sitting on now I feel like is just perfect. Soletren couch will forever be out of stock and I will never let this go :( honestly dont know how itll fit in my door but i guess i will settle for something reasonable and decent in size

IVE BEEN SPENDING SO MUCH MONEY. . . . . . . I cant even. I got paid today so todays check will be sponsoring all of my credit card funds. Gna just pay it off in full so I dont have to deal with it. But going forward a budget will be set. and luckily some of the things I bought work can reimburse so I’ll do expenses sunday perhaps.

Saturday evening after dropping off hector, we did errands in the suburbs and went to a walmart. a bit ghetto lookin but its fine. Decided to go to costco after but had an incidentn with this white man who bumped my car and didnt apologize. I was going to say something but we’re so far out in the suburbs Idk what the hell he wouldve done to me. And if they’re racist out there. took the long way home and it was prob not through the safest neighbor hoods but my mom didnt have to know since traffic on the freeway was just ALOT. omg and the roads are just so bumpy, my poor car. Becca said she has a guy at a shop her family always goes to so hopefuully I wont need him but just nice to know the option is there.

Went to the costco up by roscoe village and bought food and more essentials like medicine i have a whole pharmacy.  again throughout all this, my mom is the MVP. I wouldve been like, Ill go get it when I need it vs mom stocking up beforehand. We ended up setting my living room with a japanese style seating using my elfa shelving as the table and a towel over it. Leftovers from RPM for dinner and ribs/salad from costco. (I keep eating, and we’re not walking alot so....... I’m def gaining wait and will need to lose this asap)

I’ll be back more to cover this past week; mothers day, ikea, seafood city, hanging with becca, azul mariscos, drunk at ross and dollar tree, pants falling (mom) unbuttoned pants cuz we’re so ‘stuffffffed’ hanging with the boys via facetime cause I do miss them :( I need to havea schedule with them.

kk toodles. time to go back to work. no more crying (maybe) then an architecture tour with my mom <3 and dinner at a steakhouse at MJ’s on Michigan Ave BYeeeee

[awkward-whiteboy]

1-200

200 Questions to Ask Me!

200: My crush’s name is:  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 199: I was born in: Michigan198: I am really: Depressed, bored, hungry, lonely197: My cellphone company is: Verizon196: My eye color is: Brown/ugly195: My shoe size is: 11194: My ring size is:8.5193: My height is: 6″3192: I am allergic to: Medicine, tree dust191: My 1st car was: The piece of shitmobile190: My 1st job was: Illegal  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 189: Last book you read: How to Think About Weird Things Critical Thinking for a New Age. (Yes it’s a college textbook, but if you love debating with people on the internet [ though this is pointless] this book is a must read).188: My bed is: a college loft that I fear is going to fall any second. 187: My pet: Pet no, mascot my HARAMBE FLAG! 186: My best friend: @rinkatai @aesthetichalestorm @bookerdewiit 185: My favorite shampoo is: Whatever I have in the shower when I’m showering184: Xbox or ps3: either, but Mario Kart trumps them all183: Piggy banks are: cool if they aren’t the break ones182: In my pockets: wallet, room keys, a “Thanks asshole” note someone graciously wrote me 181: On my calendar: Peoples birthdays, and predictions for stupids shit. (5 for 6 on them being right)180: Marriage is: dumb, combining debt together over a stupid ceremony. Why not just say fuck it and save the money for a sweet house and lots of animals179: Spongebob can: keep coming out. I love that show. If given the time, I could probably quote almost all the episodes178: My mom: is my mom177: The last three songs I bought were? People buy songs? I can name albums: Reaching into infinity, Begining of the End, One More Light176: Last YouTube video watched: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsx0d3p4SMQ

175: How many cousins do you have? That I talk to, 3,4. total like 22+

174: Do you have any siblings? Youngest of 5

173: Are your parents divorced? No

172: Are you taller than your mom? Yes

171: Do you play an instrument? Guitar and Trombone

170: What did you do yesterday? Stayed up til 5 am playing Garrys Mod

[ I Believe In ]

169: Love at first sight: Sort of, doesnt work out though

168: Luck: Luck is an undeclared claim.

167: Fate: Nope

166: Yourself: Never. I always fail

165: Aliens: Hard to say, 

164: Heaven: No

163: Hell: I am a living hell

162: God: not a god, but a something

161: Horoscopes: Nope

160: Soul mates: Yes

159: Ghosts: No

158: Gay Marriage: Marriage is Marriage, IMO calling it Gay marriage is trying to make it different than regular marriage.

157: War: Yes

156: Orbs: YEs

155: Magic: No

[ This or That ]

154: Hugs or Kisses: Hugs

153: Drunk or High: Both.  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

152: Phone or Online: Phone

151: Red heads or Black haired: Red Heads, but thats just from my experience

150: Blondes or Brunettes: Brunettes

149: Hot or cold: Mild

148: Summer or winter: Winter

147: Autumn or Spring: Spring

146: Chocolate or vanilla: Vanilla

145: Night or Day: Night

144: Oranges or Apples: Apple

143: Curly or Straight hair: Curly

142: McDonalds or Burger King: BK

141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: White Chocolate

140: Mac or PC: PC

139: Flip flops or high heals: Flippers

138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: Sweet and Poor

137: Coke or Pepsi: Don’t care, just gots to be diet

136: Hillary or Obama: Norm is my OTP  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

135: Burried or cremated: Cremated, that way I’ll still be around people when im dead because no one would come willing if I was buried

134: Singing or Dancing: My singing is 1 of a kind

133: Coach or Chanel: Chanel because meme

132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: Kat McPhee, only because I don’t know any of them and Hick is a bad name with my life.

131: Small town or Big city: Both

130: Wal-Mart or Target: Target

129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Ben Stiller

128: Manicure or Pedicure: Pedi

127: East Coast or West Coast: Weast Coast  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

126: Your Birthday or Christmas: Birthday, people notice me :)

125: Chocolate or Flowers: Flowers

124: Disney or Six Flags: Datknee… Disney

123: Yankees or Red Sox: Neither

[ Here’s What I Think About ]

122: War: Pointless, but happens, Realistically, will never end.

121: George Bush: All politics have goods and bads, we’ve had better, but we also had far worse.

120: Gay Marriage: Always said

119: The presidential election: Popular vote and the current way are both fraud by the way America is. A completely new system is needed.

118: Abortion: Not a women so my opinion is not valid or needed. Honestly I hate kids. so Pro

117: MySpace: Last i checked (like a year ago,) its pretty much a Soundcloud.

116: Reality TV: Stupid

115: Parents: Do what they do. Different generation so their ways of parenting are theirs.

114: Back stabbers: Too many in my life… DAMN… MAYBE THIS IS WHY I AM FUCKED UP.

113: Ebay: I spend too much money on it

112: Facebook: Fuck the Zuck

111: Work: Never had a legal job

110: My Neighbors: Can go shove a knife up their asses 

109: Gas Prices: Better than the past

108: Designer Clothes: I’m making a separate post about this.. I might be in a bit of trouble with my college over this.

107: College: I don’t fit in anywhere. only friends I have I went to High school with. 

106: Sports: Really wish I played football in High school. I know I wouldn’t play at my school, but a smaller one I would.

105: My family: Family is family

104: The future: WIll not be brighter. 

[ Last time I ]

103: Hugged someone: Too long ago

102: Last time you ate: yesterday (2:00pm 12/13/2017)

101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: Emotional abuser has a drug dealer that lives in my colleges town. Saw her :/ cried for hours.

100: Cried in front of someone: Summer 2017

99: Went to a movie theater: whenever IT came out. Got in trouble with my colelge cause of roommates

98: Took a vacation: too long ago

97: Swam in a pool: summer 2017

96: Changed a diaper: never

95: Got my nails done: never

94: Went to a wedding: Spring 2017

93: Broke a bone: with a doctor knowing never, but like 6 years ago

92: Got a piercing: None

91: Broke the law:  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

90: Texted: I stubbed my nose on the elevator

[ MISC ]

89: Who makes you laugh the most: Doc

88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: Nothing

87: The last movie I saw: Cure For Wellness

86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: Going home so I wont be alone with my depressing thoughts and questionable music

85: The thing im not looking forward to: going to the meeting

84: People call me: Davie Crocket Davy Divad Garbage, fucker loser, pretty much every name in the book

83: The most difficult thing to do is: pretend to be normal

82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: Talked the cop out of it with my mindfucking bullshittery

81: My zodiac sign is: Scorpio

80: The first person i talked to today was:

@rinkatai

79: First time you had a crush: 9th Grade

78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: Rink

77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: Last week

76: Right now I am talking to: Myself 

75: What are you going to do when you grow up: Good question  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)  

74: I have/will get a job: No, I cant do interviews I alwasy fuck them up or never get called back

73: Tomorrow: hopefully do something better

72: Today: Watched 9 hours of netflixs

71: Next Summer: Too far to determain

70: Next Weekend: Too far to determain

69: I have these pets: None

68: The worst sound in the world: College kids screaming because finals when they are just being cliche

67: The person that makes me cry the most is: myself

66: People that make you happy: Happy? whats that

65: Last time I cried: Today

64: My friends are: Rin Doc 

63: My computer is: Fucked up because everything I own always gets fucked up

62: My School: College sucks, High School : IN A LOT OF HOT WATER

61: My Car: is a piece of shit

60: I lose all respect for people who: treat me bad… damn thats like 95% of the people I see

59: The movie I cried at was: The Producer

58: Your hair color is: Ugly Brown

57: TV shows you watch: The OFfice

56: Favorite web site: Higher or Lower Youtube

55: Your dream vacation: Somewhere with the right person

54: The worst pain I was ever in was: The emotion and things I live with everyday.

53: How do you like your steak cooked: However it is cooked

52: My room is: MY STUFF IS CLEAN roommate 1 is not

51: My favorite celebrity is: Too many to name

50: Where would you like to be: A better state of mind

49: Do you want children: NO

48: Ever been in love: Sadly

47: Who’s your best friend: Rin Doc

46: More guy friends or girl friends: Girl Friends

45: One thing that makes you feel great is: Dark humor

44: One person that you wish you could see right now: :’(

43: Do you have a 5 year plan: I only plan 5 minutes in advance

42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: No, honestly asking 10th grade me, i only planned up till graduation

41: Have you pre-named your children: NO KIDS

40: Last person I got mad at:  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

39: I would like to move to: Sanity land

38: I wish I was a professional: Musician

[ My Favorites ]

37: Candy: Sour Skittles or Mega Sours

36: Vehicle: Piece of Shit Mobile

35: President: Suliman with the Onion hat

34: State visited: Iowa. 

33: Cellphone provider: Verizon

32: Athlete: Cardale Jones

31: Actor: Bill Mother Fucking Murry

30: Actress: Emma Watson

29: Singer: Davey Jones, Davey Havok, Chester, and many more

28: Band: Too many, but I will say I’ve personally met one of them

27: Clothing store: cheap ones

26: Grocery store: cheap ones

25: TV show: Office, Simpsons South Park TWD

24: Movie: Cure For Wellness Clockwork Orange, Cant remember the name, but the original hunger games… the japanese one

23: Website: youtube

22: Animal: panda pugs

21: Theme park: cedar point

20: Holiday: leif erikson day

19: Sport to watch: hockey

18: Sport to play: football

17: Magazine:  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

16: Book: Too many

15: Day of the week: Monday. Because I play a game of what sucks more… I win a lot

14: Beach: na

13: Concert attended: Alice Cooper 3x, Deep Purple, Stone Sour, Skillet, Motley Crue 2x, FFDP, Wayland, Valraven, Alterbridge, Iron Maiden, going to see Judas Priest with someone in April

12: Thing to cook: Pasta and muffins

11: Food: ^

10: Restaurant: places with spicy chicken nuggets rice pudding and chicken noodle soup

9: Radio station: 101 WRIF Q106

8: Yankee candle scent: N/A

7: Perfume: N/A

6: Flower: Idk Roses or Marigolds

5: Color: Black orange green

4: Talk show host:  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

3: Comedian: A lot

2: Dog breed: PUG

1: did you answer all these truthfully? Like 4 are not :/

[cakalakgeorge]

New Post has been published on http://www.milliup.com/milliscrolls-ft-carolina-georges-1-song-artist-top-10-best-rap-songs-of-all-time/

MilliScrolls ft Carolina George's (1 Song/Artist) Top 10 Best RAP Songs Of All-Time!!!

Ok so I am going to start doing a “Top 10/Best Of All-Time” list from now on just so you guys can have something else to enjoy reading/watching/listening to as a debate starter. These lists will not be guaranteed or restricted to any particular genre of music other than the styles of music that I enjoy listening to and have the experience to cover.

Your opinions are your own and you are encouraged to share them. However, just know that once you see my lists some of you wont like it and thats fine with me but I will not change it. Instead, feel free to drop your own counterlists in the comment sections below.

My first list is the Top 10 (1 Song per Artist) RAP songs of all-time. This list is based off of a set of rules, those rules are as follows:

1) If an artist is selected for this particular list, he/she cannot be added again even though realistically he/she may have another song that fits a “top 10 best songs of that genre period” list… I just feel like there are enough artists and music to go around.

2) The songs will have had to make a huge impact on either society or the hip hop culture itself.

3) The song had to be written or performed by a major artist at that time.

So, without further a do…

HONORABLE MENTIONS

Jay-Z – Dead President$ – (he meant every word and has lived the lyrics)

Run DMC – Walk This Way – (pioneering and introducing rap to rock)

Eric B & Rakim – Follow The Leader -(metaphors & similitude of the lyrics)

Eminem – Stan (storytelling… From a different point of view)

Kris Kross – Jump (They said mcgiddy mcgiddy mac daddy and they were just kids)

…And way too many more to keep typing!

MY Top 10 (1 Song per Artist) RAP Songs Of All Time:

10. Three 6 Mafia – Tear Da Club Up

This song is #10 to me because this mofo done been banned worldwide because it starts club RIOTS, it was 1 OF THE FIRST times that i can remember that an artist/group connected to me with this level of “F*CK IT!” and I liked it lol it almost puts you in a trance when you it especially at a high volume level! #Hypnotizing

9. Slick Rick & Doug E Fresh – Children’s Story

This is #9 on the list because I feel like it was the best storytelling rap song for the longest stretch of time, no matter where you go ON THE ENTIRE GLOBE til this day… IF THIS RECORD COME ON THE PLACE IS IMMEDIATELY ROCKING!

8. LL Cool J – Doin it

This song is #8 of All-Time on this list simply because I loved everything about it… the chants, the dance/uptempo vibe, the back and forth in the composition, the storytelling aspect, not to mention the fact they were talking about “DOING IT” but you never feel nasty listening to it, DEFINITELY a win!

7. Nas – Rewind

This guy told a story backwards and if I’m not mistaken it was the first time this was ever done and on top of that you can visualize the lyrics and its a dope story… Yeah #7 bro!

6. OutKast – Hey Ya

#6 is such a fun record man, these artists made other listeners from other genres start looking for-and accepting hiphop artists on a broader schedule, in a lot of ways its largely because of this song and project that hiphop artists today can still easily crossover to other genres for a broader scale audience… Shake it, shake it, shake it!

5. Juvenile ft Manny Fresh & Lil Wayne – Back That Azz Up

Stop playing, yall know what the deal is when the speakers say “Cash Money taking over for the ’99 -‘2000” lol #5

4. Biggie Smalls/The Notorious B.I.G – Juicy

To make a remake and in the remake freestyle while reminiscing about the struggles coming up during the time the original record was out then adding in your ambitions and successes was extremely dope to me, I mean… simply put… #4!

3. NWA (Niggas With Attitudes) – Straight Outta Compton

The birth of Gangsta Rap from my knowledge, this group was just what hiphop needed at the time in order to express itself properly against the people who wanted to keep the minority silent… Although this record was about streetlife most of the people who also lived the “Streetlife” understood it & LOVED IT, even felt like this is how they wanted to be/should be represented and this record was their “man in the mirror” moment!

2. Kendrick Lamar – We Gone Be Alright

#2 Faced with police officers everywhere in the United States murdering blacks and getting little to no justice in the respected communities this artist drops this record and let everyone know that no matter how it feels we’ve been gere before and we will make it through this again as a people, the content of this record is beyond strong when it comes to hitting people who may feel down with a positive attitude and impact (only one other artist made a song just as strong emotionally for the people and although that record isn’t on the list he comes in with arguably the best Rap song ever which tells you how talented he was)

1. 2Pac – Brenda’s Got a Baby

This song is #1 to me because it provides the essence of life and the struggles that not only women go through but children and babies as well it literally goes into how this young ladies decisions effected everyone around her, a very special composition if you ask me.

So what y’all think? It took me a few hours to put this together so a comment(below), like, & share would be dope and very appreciated, hope you enjoyed it… Till the next list drops,

#StayUpStayGrindN #MilliUp!

[lopsidedstar]

Youre supposed to tag as many people as there are questions but I wont tag anyone, because while I love getting tagged in these, and lve doing these I always feel anxious that people will feel obligated to do it? IDK its weird. But if you wanna do it go ahead, and also add a question at the end

1. Coke or Pepsi: Weirdly? Depends on the country. Coke is better than Pepsi here at home so I guess in general, Coke. But the tasty varies. I used to drink Pepsi more than Coke when I was in canada. I dont think Im supposed to write dissertations in here, oh well. 2. Disney or Dreamworks: I’m going with Dreamworks SOLELY because of Megamind

3. Coffee or tea: Coffee 4. Books or movies: uhhhh, can I get away with Comic Books?

5. Windows or mac: Windows for sure 6. DC or marvel: Marvel Trash baby? It me 7. Xbox or PlayStation: Xbox, i guess.  8. Dragon age or mass effect: Mass Effect 9. Night owl or early riser: Night owl AND early riser. Sadly. terrible combo 10. Cards or chess: Cards 11. Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate 12. Vans or converse: Converse, but tbh both 13. Lavellan, Trevelyan, Cadash, or Adaar: I don’t know what this means (2) 14. Fluff or angst: Fluff!!!!!!! !!!!  15. Beach or forest: Forest but inside a house (can I copy all of @lyook​s answers I agree with or is that frowned uppon?) 16. Dogs or cats: cats, but I love doggos as well! 17. Clear skies or rain: I live in Brazil, if the skies are clear I am melting. Rain is all I ask for everyday (also I love the smell) 18. Cooking or eating out: I am a lesbian who REALLY loves jokes so... :) 19. Spicy food or mild food: Mild. But like flavored, none of that bland stuff 20. Halloween/Samhain or Solstice/Yule/Christmas: Halloween EVEN THOUGH WE DONT HAVE THAT HERE thats probably why I love it also COSTUmes 21. Would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too hot: too cold  22. If you could have a superpower, what would it be: Shapeshifting for sure. But not like into animals, or people. Like Kamala Khan y’know. 23. Animation or live action: Animation YEAH 24. Paragon or renegade: Paragon 25. Baths or showers: showers 26. Team cap or team ironman: Team Cap ...tain Marvel (Carol ilu) 27. Fantasy or sci-fi: Sci-Fi

28. Do you have three or four favorite quotes, if so what are they:Yes, but ill be honest its just too late for this.

29. Youtube or Netflix: Netflix 30. Harry Potter or Percy Jackson: Percy Jackson 31. When do you feel accomplished: When I get genuine compliments from people whose opinions I respect 32. Star Wars or Star Trek: Star Wars 33. Paperback books or hardback books: hardback  34. Horror or rom-com? Rom-coms!!!!! (@world where my gay romcoms at) 35. To live in a world without literature or music: oh, i dont think id survive long at all 36. Pastel colors or dark colors: AH I DONT KNOW I AM AN ARTIST ILOVE THE SOFTS BUT ALSO THE NEONS ARE SO GOOD AND IM A LIBRA I CANT CHOOSE 37. Tv shows or movies: TV Shows 38. City or countryside: City 39. If any other zodiac sign could describe you, what would it be: I’m a leo sometimes, in the sense that I can be NARCISISTIC AS FUCK (mostly is as a joke like that marina song, but wtver) 40. If you could only listen to one album for the rest of your life what would it be? Camila’s Mixtape of Her Favorite Songs 41. Cinema or theatre? Cinema 42. If you could be any fictional character’s best friend, who’d you be? oh. hm. god this is hard i have so many children. Cosima, maybe. I feel like we’d be compatible. And maybe we can make out sometimes like gals being pals 43. Smiling or smirking? Smiling. 44. Are you an ‘all or nothing’ type or are you more consistent? all or ntohing 45. Playlists or your whole library on shuffle? Gigantic spotify Playlists thats like bigger than my library 46. Traveling or staying at home? Traveling 47. Would you rather listen to only one artist for the rest of your life or read only one book for the rest of your life? Read one book 48. Do you believe people can change to a point of deserving a second chance? Yes. 49. Advice to your younger self? You have a crush on her. It wouldnt change anything, but i’d be nice to be aware.

50. Would you want to be a better writer or artist? Artist. But I do believe that to be a good artist you have to tell stories with it, and writing helps. 51. Extinction of the Dolphins or World War III? You can only choose one Better start singing So long and thanks for all the fish, fellas

[theorettigallyspeaking]

heathers!

Thank you so much!!

Favorite Character: Probably J.D., mostly because he has the best songs (as villains are wont to do in musicals). But now that I think about it, it’s probably Veronica because come on, it’s Veronica Sawyer.

Least Favorite Character: Never really cared much for Ms. Fleming, even though she has what’s objectively a top-five song in the show.

Favorite OBC Cast Member: Barrett, obviously, but honorable mentions to Elle and Ryan/Dan (I’m splitting them because I love them both equally, which doesn’t seem to be that common an opinion among the fans).

Favorite Song: 9 times out of 10 I’d answer “Meant To Be Yours,” but this is that 10th time, and there’s something about “Our Love Is God” that’s utterly hypnotizing, until, well, the death and murder. So that.

Least Favorite Song: The “Shine a Light” Reprise honestly. No real reason, it just rubs me the wrong way.

Favorite Act: I’m gonna go with Act One tbh.

Favorite Ship: I’m not really much for shipping, but I feel like I should answer this one and it’s companion question, so Veronica and Heather Mac I suppose.

Least Favorite Ship: JD and Veronica, for the same reasons you mentioned. It’s just a poisonous relationship and I can’t in good conscience support it.

If There Is Something I Would Change: Uh…I don’t really know? More Ghost!Kurt and Ram shenanigans in Act Two maybe?

Rating: 10/10, it’s my favorite musical ever until something better comes along.

Thank you so much for asking!! I love you!

[nancypullen]

Wake Up and Make Up

A couple of days ago my sister and I were talking about makeup.  We’ve been talking about makeup since I was in kindergarten. No lie.  Those tiny Avon sample lipsticks were our gateway drug and we’ve had a monkey on our backs ever since.  Here’s the thing though,  I’m not one bit sorry.  Trust me, I’ve heard all of those passive-aggressive remarks like, “Oh, I never wear makeup, who has the time?”  Me, I do.  It’s not for everyone and I’d never dream of telling another woman what she should or shouldn’t do with her face.  That said, I get asked A LOT what I use/wear/recommend.  Not because anyone wants to look like me (I’ll be 55 next month, I’m no one’s goal) but because people know that I am a Sephora junkie who absolutely loves to play with cosmetics and find out what’s new, what works, what’s wonderful, and all that.  They’d probably be surprised to learn that this is my daily face.  Super quick and super easy.

Disclaimer:  I am not a photographer and this was not a glamour photo shoot.  I pulled these items out of my makeup bag and snapped them on the bathroom counter. Deal with it.  First things first.  I love this IT Cosmetics CC cream.  It’s nourishing and it’s got 50 SPF, so that’s kind of fabulous. The tube has a pump which is really nice and a little goes a long way. I’ve had this tube since May and it’s easily got another two or three months worth in it. There’s not a huge shade range, but because it’s a CC cream it tends to blend well and I think most people could find a match.  I wear medium in the winter and medium tan in the summer.  This tube is $38, but if you check the Sephora website you can purchase a little travel tube for $15.  I’m sure it’s sold elsewhere, but I’m a loyal Sephora customer.

Next up is this fabulous little multi-tasker.  It’s Bobbi Brown’s Pot Rouge and it’s for cheeks AND lips.  Score!  I use the color Blushed Rose and I love it.

As  *ahem*  a woman of a certain age, I find that creams are kinder to my skin than layers of powders.  I tap my middle finger on this rich color and just sort of dab it on the apples of my cheeks.  Then I repeat for my lips.  It provides lasting color and it feels good on my lips.  This compact will run you $32, but remember that’s cheeks and lips. Let’s talk eyes.  I’ve never been one to wear a lot of cosmetics on my eyes.  Maybe it’s because my brother always called me “bug eyes” when we were kids and I’m still a little self-conscious about them, or maybe it’s because I find one color on my lids to be plenty.  If we’re going out for a fancy-schmancy evening I might add a little navy blue smear to the crease on top of my standard brown shadow.  I think nearly every eye color looks fabulous with a little dark blue accent.  But my go-to is a little pot of cream shadow from MAC.

Here’s the thing about eye shadow (in my humble opinion).  Most women already have pretty eyes, and you really don’t want to hide them, you just want to frame them.  Again, just my opinion, if you feel best with seven colors of glitter on your lids, then you go rock that.  I’ve almost always just worn a subtle shade of brown, sometimes a plum brown, because I once read in Seventeen magazine that’s what you should wear if you have green eyes.  The shade you see above is Constructivist from MAC Cosmetics.  I also have a lighter brown that I wear in the winter, Groundwork.  As we age, that space between the eyebrow and the lid starts to look heavy.  What do we do when we want something to recede? Color it dark!  My loyalty to brown eye shadow has paid off because a swipe of color that’s a couple shades darker than your skin tone can make that droopy upper lid recede.  Or at least give the illusion that it does. These Mac Paint Pot beauties run about $19 and they last for-ev-er.  Seriously, you’ll get your money’s worth out of every product I’m listing.  Besides, people think nothing of dropping $30 for a pizza dinner that literally turns to poop, or twice that much on garden mulch that they’ll rake up at the end of the season.  I have a friend who will only use scented garbage bags and special orders them (newsflash, your garbage still smells like garbage) but wont splurge on a good foundation.    I used to justify my cosmetics because I cut and color my own hair, I rarely spend on clothes, I don’t have expensive hobbies, and blah,blah,blah.  Now I just admit that I like makeup and I think it’s okay to use good quality products on your FACE.  No apologies.   And that brings us to my favorite product of all... The cheese stands alone.

 This, my friends, is Giorgio Armani’s Black Ecstasy mascara.  It is made with the tears of angels and unicorn fluff.  I don’t know what sorcery is involved in the making of this stuff, and I don’t care.  It’s $32 and worth every penny.  I’d give up every other product but this one.  Over the years I’ve tried drugstore mascaras and they always irritated my eyes.  I graduated to Clinique and Estee Lauder and they were fine.  In fact, for years I used whatever was on sale or in the “gift with purchase” at my local department store cosmetics counter...and they were all fine. Just fine.  Then Sephora sent me a sample of Armani’s and that was all over.  One swipe, honestly just one swipe is all it takes to coat and separate my lashes.  You don’t have to go all Tammy Faye to get lush lashes. I dip and swipe on my right eye, then dip and swipe on my left eye, and finish by running the brush horizontally across the bottom lashes of each eye with what’s left.  It doesn’t flake and get in my eyes, and there’s nothing in it that irritates.  It’s my true love. My soul mate. So that’s my makeup routine, 4 products.  My look rarely changes.  I’m pretty boring.  These photos are all spaced about a month apart.  *YAWN*

 Don’t judge me.  I’ve never taken a great photo in my life.  Or maybe I really do just look goofy all the time. The last picture is my norm.  I somehow always manage to look like a cocker spaniel who needs to go out. I’m not wrong.

I’d be remiss if I didn’t add my other favorite lipstick to this list.  I’ve been buying it for several years, since it made its debut, and I’m still in love with it.  

Bare Minerals Liquid Lipstick in the color XYZ.  That’s the color I’m wearing in the first two pics and the Bobbi Brown Blushed Rose is in the third picture.  There’s not a huge difference, but the XYZ is a warmer color and the Blushed Rose is obviously pinker and cooler.  This Bare Minerals lipstick is fantastic.  It goes on super creamy with a little doe foot applicator and dries down to a matte finish that will last alllll day. When I wear it I always pop a spot of gloss on my bottom lip, or at least a little Carmex - I think I’m too old for a super matte lip, but maybe I’m too old for gloss.  Maybe no one cares. Either way, this tube is always in my makeup bag. Don’t think for a minute that just because I’ve listed only a few products here that I don’t have drawers upon drawers full of palettes, winter colors, summer colors, fancy night out colors, that one red lipstick that I really want to wear but I look like Cruella de Vil when I do....and more.  This list is my automatic, never-fails-me, done-in-5-minutes face.  None of these things will hide all of the crinkles I’m getting around my eyes.  I’ll let you know right away if I find that miracle product.  I use a cleanser and moisturizer from Paula’s Choice.  They run $10 or $11 dollars and the bottles are large and will last months and months.  I love and trust Paula’s Choice - Paula Begoun is the woman who wrote my bible, Don’t Go to the Cosmetics Counter Without Me.  You can read about that here: https://www.paulaschoice.com/who-we-are/about-paula.html I hope that these ramblings answer a few questions.  What works for me might not work for you. Hopefully the products I’ve shared here are universal enough that they’d be a nice addition to anyone’s war paint.  If you want to expand your inventory, stop at any Sephora and ask for samples.  I’ve had them pump two or three foundations at a time into little sample pots. They’re happy to do it.  They have an exceptional return policy where they’ll take back a product (with the receipt), no questions asked - so they’d much rather you take home a sample than return a full-sized item.  Another bonus, Sephora employees do not receive commission. You won’t get a hard sell or a pushy employee trying to fill your bag for their benefit.  I like that.  Now, if you go to your local Sephora and encounter a snotty girl who acts like assisting you or providing samples is a bother, ask for a manager - that’s not okay.  I’ve never had that issue, but I’ve also not been to every Sephora.  I take that back, the super models in the Sephora  on Champs d'Elysées in Paris were kind of rude - but that may have been a combination of a language barrier and the fact that I looked like a Hobbit who’d been caught in the rain.  Still, not okay. Wear it, don’t wear it, be as natural or as glamorous as you like. But whatever you choose, do it for yourself.   I paint my face for me.  I like it.  I don’t do this for other women, and I sure as heck don’t do it for men.  I’m not spending money on a lipstick for someone that I wouldn’t trust to pick a paint color.   Mine is the only opinion that matters when it comes to my face, my body, my hair, my clothes, etc.  Get that set in your mind and you’ll enjoy your days. P.S.  Even though I mentioned Sephora a million times and shared specific brands, this is not a sponsored post and I’m not promoting or advertising for anyone.  But hey, if Sephora is listening I wouldn’t get mad at a gift card.  My husband would probably appreciate it.