#my new favorite sport - eras tour

[sophisticatedswifts]

Apparently I do like sporting events now. Disregard everything I’ve said in the past.

[seeingivy]

the sound of the applause

actor!eren x f!reader

**part of my method acting series

content: pain pre cursor.

an: songs mentioned - london boy by taylor swift, golden hour by jvke, girlfriend by avril lavigne. anyways. this chapter tame af. we are starting our demonic era. and no, you are not getting an eren pov until I say so. and I have covid so I am feeling extra evil and already writing the next one.

previous part linked here

--

You’re twelve years old the first time that you feel it. 

You have hippies to thank for the entire ordeal. In your small, small town in Canada, there’s very little tension or importance on the arts. Singing, dancing, acting - like many places around the world - fall short to the highs and lows that come with sports. 

Your middle school is no exception. A school that can barely spare money to fund a dying arts department, that begrudgingly offers one generalized art class that covers the basics of painting. Except when the hippy dippy parents in town petition, file a complaint with the mayor, they’re sequestered to include arts in all sectors that sports are included in. 

A law that opens doors insanely. And creates the opportunity that exposes you to it. The singer showcase at the football pep rally. 

And if you have to, you guess you have to thank food poisoning as well. Because Paulina, the original girl who was supposed to sing, was missing from first period that morning and you were all too quick to offer to take her spot. 

They give you that pitchy, old black microphone and let you sing your heart out to one of your favorite old songs, At Last by Etta James. And when you open your eyes, the recollection of the performance is wiped from your mind seconds after you finish, and there’s only one thing you remember. It rings so hard, the sound so loud in your eardrums that it’s all you feel. The rush of the blood, the eyes staring back at you, and your cheeks burning. 

When you think back, long and hard, that’s the first time it happens. The first time you feel it. It sits with you, that resounding pressure, that digs on you to give in. The need, the want, the infatuation with the rush you’re feeling. 

And the obsession with the sound of the applause.

--

“Y/N. Wake up.” 

You aggressively push your forehead into the plush of your pillow, creating a nice symphony of groaning songs in response to Danny, who is interrupting your beauty sleep. 

“How long has it been?” you murmur into the pillow, the stinging in your head and the fatigue sitting in your body telling you it couldn’t have even been an hour.

“An hour. But I just realized, the bridge didn’t come out right when I was mixing so you have to record it again.” 

“Can you come back in like three years? When I have the energy?” you groan. 

“Y/N. I’ll see you in five down there.” he definitively states, shuffling out of your room. 

Against every fiber of your being, you pull yourself out of the bed and drag yourself down to the studio, making it a point to glare at him as you re-record the bridge of the song you wrote yesterday. You give it a few tries, messing with the octaves and inflections, until you get a shining thumbs up, and wrap yourself into the blanket left on the couch. 

“You write anything new?” 

“Shut the fuck up.” 

You hold out your green book to Danny, opening it to the page marked, at which your producer is already wrinkling his nose. He hasn’t even read the lyrics yet, but you’re sure the title - Cry - is already setting him off. 

“You didn’t even read it yet.” you respond, frowning. 

“I don’t have to read it to know it’s brilliant. But you were there in that meeting last week and you know this isn’t what we can push out.” he responds, turning back to his soundboard, half-pulling his headphones back onto his ear. 

“Danny. I-I just haven’t been able to write songs like that lately. This is what’s coming out.” 

After nearly a year of writing music and touring, Danny and Sareen have leaned heavily into your Lover Girl branding. An affectionate term used by your fans, but now the entirety of the breadth that you work with. You’re widely known for the lovey dovey, sweet songs you write so when anything that falls outside of that mold, it isn’t stuff Danny and Sareen appreciate. 

But you haven’t been able to write any of that lately. Which only makes that resoundling, crackling, heavy pressure in your head worse. Like you’re defective.

He turns around in his swivel chair, taking the little bound book you’re holding out for him, as he starts flipping through the pages. The worn down book you were gifted on your birthday years ago is filled with every mess of lyrics you’ve written, though none of them are meeting the game plan that was set weeks ago. 

That announcement sent everyone on your team into a frenzy, which was so far from your initial reaction. 

First of all, it was a rumor. That you were one leg away from being a triple threat. Second, if it’s true, you’re ecstatic. Enthralled and honored and every feeling in between. That you were even in the consideration for being a triple threat, let alone a few feet away from it.  

No one else on your team saw it that way. Your producer, Danny, saw this as a sign that you need to be making more music and faster. The songs you make take you weeks to write at this point, no thanks to the perfectionism that comes with writing the lyrics and working out the sound. He’s set a goal for you - to write one song everyday. It makes it - that impending doom in your head - ten pounds heavier.

Your manager, Sareen, is no better. She only took this as a sign that you need to start being more vigilant. A hard-assed woman in her forties, Sareen is all about work ethic. That staying determined is the only way that you will get through this. And she’s extremely blunt when she tells you so. 

Stars don’t take breaks. If you want it that badly, you have to work harder. There’s six thousand things working against you, take it as a note that you need to be running faster. That you aren’t trying hard enough. Those are equivalent to dumbbells for that rock on your head, that you’re sure is responsible for pinching all your nerves. 

And it’s a matter of proving yourself. To Sareen, Danny, Eren, and everyone who watches you. 

You appreciate the push. It’s extremely draining, but worth it when your song releases are so anticipated that you’re selling millions of copies before the song comes out. Have sold out stadium tours, and are shortlisted for awards nearly every time you do something. 

You wake up. Get ready for the show. Memorize lines in between shows, film when you don’t have shows. Write songs on flights, produce through voice memos since you’re hardly in one place at a time. 

And when you think about it all, finally being a triple threat, finally getting to hear Eren say that he told you so like you said that first night on set together, it’ll all be worth it. It’ll be over. 

You can stop running. You can stroll, swim, make the music you like. So you oblige. This is part of the process, you just have to push through. There’s an end goal in sight. And being near Eren is a part of it. 

“Have you ever thought about writing a song about…Ricky James?” Danny asks, swinging around in his chair as he smiles at you. 

You wrinkle your nose as you throw the closest thing, an empty CD case, at Danny as he laughs back. 

“Ew, Danny. That’s so not a thing.” 

Ricky James, an infinite, insurmountable amount of talent, was your co-star on your last movie, Little Women. A British singer-songwriter, who virtually blew up over night. 

He was nice - definitely the charismatic, flirty type of co-star. You’re positive half of it is the accent. After the two of you started doing press for Little Women, everyone was swooning over the two of you together. At how you guys had a handshake, did your famous kiss scene in one take, and how in almost every interview, he made it a point to joke that he was in love with you. 

You get it. It works well for the press, gets people talking about the movie. But you could never like a guy like Ricky James. Or anyone who wasn’t Eren, for that matter. 

“I know it’s not a thing. You’re all goo goo ga ga over loverboy. But it’s the same thing that we did for Little Women. He used the fact that people like to speculate to his advantage. It wouldn’t hurt to do the same.” Danny responds, shrugging. 

“I already do use that to my advantage. It’s no secret that I earned my whole Lover Girl branding from writing love songs about Eren.” 

“Yeah, but you know how it’s been for Eren lately. Maybe it’s not the best thing that your name is attached to him anymore? For both of you?” Danny states. 

Eren’s had a rough go of it lately. After Satellite Port failed and the joke they made at the awards show last year, he’s all but resigned into what you call hiding. He said that he’s just busy, focusing on landing new roles and getting more credits under his belt. You know that he recently signed a deal with Scott Clarkson to film five movies with his studio, which is promising. 

But you know Eren too well. He’s retreating, hiding in all senses of the word. From you too. The texts he used to send you - good luck before every show, a good morning even though you were on different sides of the world - have ceased all together. And the few seconds you do catch him, he seems worlds away. 

And it’s not just you who has caught onto it. The last time you saw Historia, when she came to watch your show, she mentioned that she was concerned about him, that she thinks he’s being a little bit self destructive by working with Stone Studios. That Scott Clarkson is not a good idea. 

Granted, Scott Clarkson is buddy buddy with John. You know that’s a touchy subject for her and made it a point to bring it up to Eren. To see if he was okay. But you were flying out for a tour and forgot to. And then he started showing up in the press again, hanging out with the cast he’s been working with, so you figured it was fine. That he’s going out again, smiling in photos. 

“That-that’s not true. He’s on the come up - he’s going to be the lead in the Gatsby remake that Stone Studios is doing. I’m sure he’ll get an award for it.” 

“There’s no need to get defensive. I’m just saying it doesn’t hurt to expand your horizons. Triple threats are awarded for being versatile, not sticking with what’s easy. Maybe you just need to push the boundary of what you think you can do.” he says, giving your forehead a tap.  

“It kind of feels like cheating to write a song about someone that’s not him.” you murmur, looking down at the pages in your hand. Eren’s handwriting is scribbled onto the invisible string page. Hell was the journey but it brought me heaven. 

“You know, Sareen’s not too keen about this relationship. And I know that Eren’s team isn’t either.” Danny states. 

“Who are they to tell us who we can date?” 

“It’s not about who you can date. It-it’s about the image. Tying your name to his doesn’t exactly always work in your favor, Y/N. There’s no loyalty in an industry like this. And for Eren’s case, you’ve never really helped him in that sense. When you stand together, with the success you’ve had, all they see is a failure in Eren, when he’s really not even that bad.” 

“People’s comparisons aren’t my fault. And Eren’s doing fine, he-he’s okay.” 

“Now, he is. But a few months ago, it was your name next to his that was dragging him down. If it comes down to triple threats and it’s between you and him, are you telling me that you would really pick him over you?” 

Yes. One thousand times, yes. Though you know that’s not the answer Danny wants. 

“You have to be more selfish, Y/N. And maybe that’s selfless for Eren's sake too. There isn’t room for the both of you, right now. I know you love him, but Sareen has a point. Is working this hard worth it if you don’t get what you want out of it? You and Eren have all the time in the world to be together, just focus on your career before him.” 

You frown, staring at the wrinkles pressed up against his forehead. 

“You can have what you want - have your cake and eat it too, write all these corny love songs about him after you make it. Stop running when you’re actually there, kid.” 

You look down at the pages, the thoughts floating through your mind, as the lyrics start spilling out. For your first song that’s not about Eren. 

London Boy. 

--

You try to make a point to call Eren before releases. Key word, try. 

But it doesn’t happen that way. Because Eren’s in Los Angeles and you’re in Tokyo and the time difference messes the two of you up so bad that when they surprise drop London Boy, you don’t get to warn Eren beforehand. 

And when he texts you about it, you can feel the guilt creeping into your chest. Because you know he’s too nice to say what he actually thinks about it. If it were you, you’d wring Eren’s neck out for writing a song like this about his co-star he’s rumored to be dating. But Eren is Eren and he would never. 

eren: “he likes my american smile?” babe, you’re canadian. 

eren: i like the song. really. 

you: i have dual citizenship. 

you: eren. i’m so so sorry. i meant to tell you before but the time differences, we just kept missing each other. you know i don’t mean any of it, right? 

you: it’s just a marketing thing danny and sareen planned. the song will be a hit if people are speculating who it’s about and stuff. 

eren: i figured. you don’t have to explain yourself to me!!!! 

eren: you’re a pop princess <3

eren: and currently number one on the billboard hot 100 for the fourth time in a row!!! 

You nearly throw your phone across the room at the notifications, the frustration building so hard that it’s all pouring out of your head. You can see the stack of gifts at the front of the room - candies from Falco and Colt, as well as Marco, Historia, and Reiner - for the release.

And it’s moments like this, when you’ve been running so fast and pushing so hard, that you resort to one of your worst tendencies. Because the only thing that helps you when you feel like this is being a masochist. Feeling bad only makes you want to feel worse. Like you deserve it. 

So you inflict it on yourself. By reading what people say about you online. 

You reach back for your phone - ignoring the messages from Armin, Bertholdt, and Levi - as you scroll to Twitter, hiding the light of the phone under your sheets as you look through the app. 

You look at the trending tab. Y/N L/N, London Boy, Ricky James, Eren Jaeger, and love is dead are trending. 

You press your bolded name and swipe to the recents tab, scrolling through every tweet, each one categorizing, sticking in your mind as you scroll. A mix of the good, the bad, and the ugly. 

That you’re pretty. That you’re ugly. That you have no personality, that you write mediocre songs, that you’re the best actress from Attack on Titan. That you’re lucky for bagging Ricky James and Eren, that you’re too good for Eren, that you’re horrible for writing the song. 

You place the phone flat on the sheets, the absence of light making your eyes sting, as the tears string out of your eyes. 

You want to make your cake and eat it too. 

But is it even worth it if this is how you have to get there? 

--

You stick your hand out, swinging it in the air with Ricky as you do your handshake, and plop onto the couch. Danny and Sareen called a meeting with Ricky’s team before you guys went to the wrap party for The Proposal, which is the only thing on your calendar that you were actually looking forward to this month. 

Because Annie and Armin are the leads and because you know Levi and Hange are going to be there. 

“This is Michael and Nancy. They’re my talent managers.” Ricky states, pointing out the two people across from you. 

“Sareen and Danny. Sareen’s my manager and Danny’s my producer.” 

“Is he behind the genius of London Boy?” Ricky asks, smirking at you. 

“Shut up. London Boy isn’t about you, Ricky.” 

“Oh, shut up. I know I’m your muse.” 

The line sits in your stomach wrong, because all you can think about is Eren. Seventeen year old Eren, shimmering green eyes on that empty set when you wrote New Year’s Day. You shake your head as Danny turns to the two of you, a smile on his face. 

“We have an idea.” Danny states, a smile on his face. 

You and Ricky nod as Nancy and Sareen start laying out the plan, each consecutive word twisting horribly in your stomach. 

Surely they can’t be serious. 

“We think that the two of you should date, as a PR move.” Sareen states, handing over a folder to you. 

There’s dates listed out, public places where they want you and Ricky to meet at, and songs they want you to release about each other. All down to the slated releases, ideas for album covers, and interviews they want you to do. 

“This is part of Y/N’s triple threat campaign. I think putting in this whole ruse of a relationship and writing songs about it, especially if there’s some part of it that will be drama because of Eren and Lana, it’s even better.” 

“Lana?” you ask. 

“She’s Ricky’s old girlfriend. They aren’t dating anymore, which is something that we should capitalize on. For the both of you. This should get Ricky into the leagues for the Album of the Year award when he releases next year.” Nancy states, flipping through the pages. 

You look over at Ricky, ready to fully shut down the idea. But when you turn your head to him, he’s flipping through the pages, writing down his own ideas in the folder. 

“Ricky. You’re not actually considering this, are you?” you whisper. 

“You aren’t?” 

“I’m dating Eren. No, I’m not considering fake dating you for the press.” 

“Eren, who was seen on a date with Myka yesterday? Right.” he states bluntly, flipping through the pages. 

“That’s just tabloids, Ricky. Be serious.” 

“And so is this. Myka and Eren are in a movie together. You and I are musicians. You can do the same thing as him and I bet you he wouldn’t even care. And he shouldn’t, because your career comes first.” Ricky states, leaning forward on his knees to discuss more with Danny and Sareen. 

You flip through the folder again, each consecutive page filled with more and more details of how they want you and Ricky to pretend. And the last page has the words bolded, little stars around them. 

Y/N gets triple threat status! Ricky gets Album of the Year! 

“Y/N. Have your cake and eat it too.” Danny warns, a reminder of what you’re supposed to be prioritizing. 

“This is the time to run, Y/N. You’re almost there.” Sareen affirms, the two of them nodding as they look at you. 

And by the way five of them are staring at you, big eyes filled with anticipation as they wait for your response, you know you can’t say no. That insurmountable pressure - to please, to be successful, to be the best - wins out, every time.

Danny’s produced for three different hit pop stars. Sareen’s managed some of the biggest names in the industry. And you have no idea who Nancy and Michael even are, but if they’re working with Ricky, they’ve got to be in the big leagues. 

You put the folder down, giving all of them a nod, as they all erupt into cheers. Ricky leans forward to give you a kiss on the cheek, which you tell him to save for the cameras, as you take the folder and walk out. 

And figure out how you’re going to tell Eren. 

--

You head to the wrap party three hours later and any excitement you had about the event is immediately drained when you know that Eren’s going to be there and you have to talk to him about it. Break up with him. 

“Y/N!” 

You turn around to find Armin and Annie, the two of them wrapping their arms around you as they press kisses to your cheeks. You try to stifle the literal tears that are making their way to your eyes at the sight of them, their blue eyes the same soft ones you’ve always known. 

“Annie. Armin. I’m so excited for the movie, I’m sure it’s going to be great.” you say, squeezing both of their hands. 

Two of your shyest friends still, they’re both blushing at the praise as Connie and Sasha walk up. You’re wrapping your arms around all of them, as everyone else - Reiner, Mikasa, and Jean - join you. 

“So Y/N. London Boy, huh?” Connie asks, smirking. 

“Did you guys know that Eren is from London?” Sasha says, sarcastically. 

“Oh, quit it. It’s just one of those PR things. The triple threat thing made them all go crazy.” you respond. 

“We respect the hustle, Y/N.” Connie states, mock saluting you with Jean. 

“There is no press better than you and Eren releasing Medicine and Dress on the same day.” Mikasa states, earning a bunch of laughter from the group. 

“Oh god. Don’t remind me. Whore move, from the both of you.” Reiner says, pinching your cheek. Connie mocks the ah ah ah, from Dress, which has you all laughing.

You smack his hand off as Marco slings his hand around your shoulders, squeezing hard and smiling at you so big, in earnest, that it makes your chest hurt. 

“Can you believe it? You’re so close to it, Y/N - I can feel it.” Marco says, leaning forward to press a kiss onto your cheek. 

You reach up to squish the plush of his cheek as Marco mimics your movements, the two of you smiling at each other. And then you feel two warm hands on your shoulder and turn around to see Eren, soft green eyes looking into yours. 

And it makes you burst into tears. Soft green eyes, albeit a little tired looking, and Eren’s hair all grown out. When did Eren grow his hair out to his Season Three length? The last time you saw him, it was so short. He looks the same. He feels far away. And that pressure in your head is resounding. 

“Yeesh.” Connie says at the sight of your spilling tears, earning quiet laughs from everyone. 

Eren brings his hand up to your cheek, swiping the wetness away, as he glares at Connie. 

“Connie.” Eren warns, the tone in his voice threatening. 

“Sorry. Just missed him, that’s all.” you respond, wiping the last of the wetness off your face as they all smile at you. 

“Man, every time I see one of you, you’re crying.” Hange says from behind you, the group of you turning your heads and immediately tackling them and Levi into hugs. Eren reaches for Hange first and you go for Levi, his stupid minty smell making your tears return. 

You look up at Levi, who's glaring at you, and can’t help but smile. 

“Levi. You could at least pretend you’re happy to see me.” 

“I am happy to see you. But not when you’re crying in public. You two are going to give me an ulcer.” he states, frowning as he glares at Eren at your side. 

You look over at Eren, the end of what Hange said catching up with you. 

“You cried in front of them? About what, Eren?” you ask, voice soft. 

“Ah. Nothing.” Eren responds, cheeks lightly pink as he runs his hand through his hair. 

You both let go of Hange and Levi as Armin and Annie take to the makeshift stage, giving a little speech about their time on the film and how grateful they are for everyone in the room for supporting them. And as they do, Eren jabs his elbow into your side. 

“Ow. What gives?” you whisper. 

Eren places hand on his chest, feigning shock. 

“Don’t tell me you forgot our secret hand signals already?” he whispers. 

Jab in the side. Meaning, you need a second to talk, away from everyone. 

“As if.” you respond, giving a nod to his sign. 

He gives you a smile as you both turn your heads back to Annie and Armin, who are playing the trailer on the screen now. And when they finish, the resounding noise of the claps are the last thing you and Eren hear when you go out to the balcony, the cold air surrounding you both. 

You wrap your hands around your arms, which Eren picks up on too fast and suddenly he’s taking his coat off and wrapping it around you. Making a point to pull your hair out of the collar, hands focused on fixing your hair around your face. 

“Eren.” 

“Yes?” 

“I-” 

The words die on your tongue. Because here he is, the perfect green eyes you fell in love with staring at you in the lamplight of the dark, and you can’t say it. You can’t shatter his heart into pieces or be the one to let him go. 

When he’s one of the only things you’ve wanted.

“I know how you feel, Y/N. You don’t have to say it.” he whispers, hands tucking your hair behind your ears before letting go. 

You can feel the tears spilling out of your eyes as you frown at him, the look on his face so pained that it hurts. 

“I’m guessing they don’t want you to see me, at least not for right now?” Eren asks. 

You nod, aggressively wiping away the wetness on your cheeks as you reach for his hands, squeezing three times. You hate that he knows. That Danny and Sareen think he isn’t good enough for you. When you’ve always been the one who was never in the same league as him. 

That Eren was the one who defended you when you were there, but no one’s letting you do it for him. 

“I still love you, Eren. You-you know that?” 

“I know that.” he whispers, nodding. His eyes are focused on your hands, interlocked with his. He reaches in for your bicep, fingers tracing over the fish tattoo right above your elbow. 

“Fishbowl, Y/N. We’ll come back to each other when it’s time. Just don’t be a stranger.” he says. 

You nod, reaching forward and wrapping your arms around him as you nearly sob into his chest, his voice soothing your hiccuping, even though you’re the one who just smashed him into pieces. And when Eren wraps his hands around your cheeks, giving you one last lingering kiss, before walking away, you can’t help but sit there in the cold, his jacket wrapped around you and letting the tears bite on your skin. 

--

You close your phone, giving Ricky a glowing smile, as you both settle into your seats at the Institute Music Awards. The two of you officially went public earlier today, though you’re both still denying any rumors that you’re dating. 

“How does Ricky compare to Eren?” 

You try to hide your scoff as you answer, trying your best to stay neutral in your response to avoid becoming a headline the next day. 

“I’ll always have so much love for Eren. We grew up together and really came into this hand in hand and no one could ever really take that away. And there’s no bad blood between us, we’ll always be best friends.” you respond, giving them a polite smile as you walk away and swallow hard. 

You can see Eren twenty feet down, in a specially designed suit that he looks wonderful in, smiling for the cameras. He’s standing in between Hyla and Myka, since their film is premiering in a few days. 

“You look green, doll.” 

You turn around to find Sukuna, who you fake punch in the shoulder and glare at, before pulling him in for a hug. 

“You sure you’re not talking about yourself? That’s your girl down there.” 

“Jesus, Y/N. Don’t ever associate me with her again.” Sukuna mutters, rolling his eyes. 

“Oh? Was it not you saying she wasn’t that bad when we were kids?” you tease, poking into the soft of his cheek. 

“Well, that was before I found everything out. I’d say a prayer for your boy over there, he’s about to get himself into a gnarly mess he won’t be able to get out of.” Sukuna responds, eyes focused on Eren and Hyla posing together a few feet down. 

“What do you mean?” you ask, linking your arm with his as the two of you walk down, past him. You make it a point to attempt to make eye contact with Eren, but he’s too focused on Hyla that he misses you all together. 

“I just mean…he’s about to get himself involved in things he shouldn’t. And you should stay far away.” Sukuna states, giving Ricky a polite smile as he joins you at your side. Sukuna gives you one last kiss on the cheek before Ricky links his arm with yours, dragging you to your seats. 

You both settle into the seats, giving Marco a big smile as he sits next to you. 

“Hey. Where’s Hisu? I saw her name card here earlier but it’s not here anymore.” you whisper, as the lights start dimming ahead. 

Marco winces, giving you an awkward smile as he puts his hand over yours and squeezes. 

“She doesn’t want to sit with Ricky. Or you.” 

“Oh.” 

“Just for today, Y/N. Because of the history and all that, you-you know that.” 

You shake your head, ignoring the stinging, as you give Marco a half-hearted smile, nodding. 

“No yeah. I get it. I’ll talk to her soon.” 

“Okay.” Marco responds, giving you a smile. 

You make it a point to do your best throughout the awards show, fake whispering in Ricky’s ears every time the camera is on you two, holding hands and comparing hand sizes, letting him tuck your hair behind your ear once and a while. 

And it’s all going great and peachy, until Hyla gets called on stage to perform. You crane your neck back to find Sukuna, giving him a warning glance as he rolls his eyes, making the motion that he’s choking himself. 

One of the most insane things about Hyla and Sukuna’s beef? The fact that they perform and write songs about each other, that are so insanely written, that they trend for weeks. 

You’re sure Hyla and Sukuna are what Danny and Sareen dream about in their free time. 

Hyla gets on stage, giving everyone a soft smile as a few of the girls join her on stage, adjusting their microphones. You can feel Ricky squeezing your hand hard, his jaw clenched. 

“You good?” 

“The lineup. Hyla, Myka, and Lana.” he responds, glaring at the three of them. 

You focus your eyes on the third girl, Lana, who is Ricky’s ex-girlfriend. The only reason he wants to fake date you. Apparently, the two of them broke up after you and Ricky started trending, her insecurities about the people’s words overruling any reassurance that Ricky could give her. 

“This is my new song, it’s called Girlfriend. I hope you all like it.” Hyla says, giving a smile as the upbeat music starts. 

Hey, hey, you, you  I don’t like your girlfriend  No way, no way I think you need a new one Hey, hey, you, you I could be your girlfriend

You lean back as you observe the visuals and the line of backup dancers supporting the three of them singing, their performance extremely upbeat and punk pop star that you can’t help but tap your feet to the beat of the song. 

That’s until they reach the bridge. When Hyla pulls one of the back-up dancers from the background to the front and Lana pulls Eren on stage, the two of them are seated on the makeshift chairs on the stage. Hyla’s singing around Eren, rolling her eyes at the back-up dancer. 

Who's wearing the exact outfit that you wear on your tour, a sparkly, billowing pink dress. And when you take her in properly, you realize that she’s supposed to be you. The same hairstyle, eye color, skin tone. You can feel your throat dry as you watch Eren’s cheeks tinted pink on stage as Hyla sings around him, the entire audience erupting into cheers. 

(Oh) In a second, you'll be wrapped around my finger  'Cause I can, 'cause I can do it better There's no other, so when's it gonna sink in? She's so stupid, what the hell were you thinkin'?

You feel Marco’s hand on yours, squeezing hard, as you focus in on the performance, trying to ignore the fact that the big, black camera is shining on your face and that everyone in the room is looking at you. And that millions of people must be talking about it at home. You turn back to give Levi a look and he shakes his head, mouthing don’t cry which you halfheartedly nod in response too. 

Jean and Armin have switched seats with the two girls behind you, their hands on your shoulders, squeezing, as Eren and Hyla walk off stage, hand in hand past the back up dancer who’s supposed to be you - who's crying fake buckets of tears now. 

And when it’s all done and over, you skip the afterparties and let Mikasa drive you home. She tucks you into your sheets, making it a point to help you wipe all your makeup off and leave a bottle of water by your bed, you sink into your sheets and do it again. Let that overwhelming, embarrassing, deep rooted hatred sink in. 

And pull up Twitter. Read about how everyone hates you. Relive the most embarrassing thing that’s happened to you yet. Stare at pictures of Eren and Hyla and ignore the resounding sound of the applause the two of them received.

--

next part linked here

taglist:

@k0z3me @kayleegomez @yihona-san06  @bsenpai  @sweetenertea @mykyoon @violetmatcha  @rebeccawinters @cutiejg @bokutosthings @bookwrmm @mblrrr @wheredidmycrowngo @somethinginyoureyes7 @chilichopsticks @okaystopwhore @you-always-made-me-blush @itzmeme @firelordazulaaaa @whoami-72 @g-ghostly @intimacywithceline @erensmoodygf @cocomellxn @princess-ackerman @jaegerfiles @cacapeepee @squirrelspoetry @rui-0836 @moonmalice @invisible-mori @sofiasberr @bbybeeb @timetobegone @tee4str @ttokki2 @leave-rae-alone @ec3lipsy @officialsimpp @gojojang @yookayyo

pls comment on this post or any of the chapters if you want to be added to the taglist <3

[halucynator]

The surprise

Pairing: Mattheo Riddle x fem!reader

Request (I wasn't specifically requested this but I wanna write it. This was inspired by @annaisabookworm's post xx) : I LOVE MY FAVORITE FANFICTION WRITERS ON TUMBLR BUT YOU KNOW WHAT I WANNA SEE WRITTEN?! I WANT A FANFICTION WHERE MATTHEO OR THEODORE TAKE THE READER TO THE ERAS TOUR AND SHE WEARS THE BLURPLE MINDNIGHTS BODY SUIT COUSTUME AND THEY HAVE A CHAIR T SHIRT ON (ikyk) AND THEIR JAW DROPS AND ARE LITERALLY IN SHOCK ALL NIGHT AND THE READER AND HAVE HAVE THE BEST TIME EVER. AND SHES A HUGE SWIFTIE WHOS HYPERFIXATED ON THE ERAS TOUR AND HE SUPRISES HER WITH FRONT ROW TICKETS- ITD BE SO CUTE-

Warnings: I don't think there is any lmk if there are.

A/n: this post is for @annaisabookworm (and anyone else who's reading this lol). I hope you like ittt 💞 this text is full of Taylor Swift song like puns or jokes or wtv (idk) so I apologize in advance lmao

In the midst of the swirling excitement that is the ERAS Tour, you found yourself standing at the entrance of the bustling concert venue, heart racing with anticipation. Beside you stood Mattheo, your boyfriend, who had guaranteed you an unforgettable night. You were dressed in the most enchanting attire—a blurple midnights body suit dress (which Mattheo had bought for you saying you would look stunning in) which was very well bejeweled - in the words of Taylor Swift and your boyfriend- capturing the essence of Taylor Swift's iconic style. And not to forget, your boyfriend sporting the chair T-shirt that only true fans would recognize.

Two weeks ago you wouldn't even have imagined coming here. Thanks to your boyfriend and now the King of your Heart, Mattheo, you could make your dreams come true. You were going on and on about how much you wanted to go and Mattheo had to give in and buy you tickets. He was going to buy you era tickets anyway, but this made him even more happy for his decision.

As the pulsating energy of the crowd enveloped you, the gates opened, revealing a world of lights, music, and magic. Your breath hitched as you walked through to the other side of the door, feeling like you were about to embark on the journey of a lifetime. Mattheo grinned at your reaction, his eyes dancing with a mix of mischief and delight. Little did you know, he'd been plotting a surprise that would take this night to a whole new level.

With a shared glance that spoke volumes, you and Mattheo made your way to your seats. As the first notes of Taylor's song filled the air, your heart swelled with emotion. But it was not just the music that left you in awe—it was Mattheo's expression. His jaw dropped as he took in the dazzling stage, the dynamic choreography, and the sheer magnitude of the production. His shock was mirrored in your own astonishment, and the two of you exchanged a wide-eyed, incredulous look.

Throughout the night, as Taylor Swift commanded the stage with her powerful presence, you and Mattheo were captivated, utterly lost in the enchantment of the moment. The delicate vocals seemed to transport you to another world. Each time you stole a glance at Mattheo, you were met with a mixture of joy, amazement, and gratitude. It was as if the two of you shared a secret language—a language of shared fandom, love, and an understanding that words could never fully capture.

As the concert reached its crescendo, Mattheo's excitement becomes palpable. He leaned closer to you, a sparkle in his eyes, and whispered, "Are you ready for one more surprise?" Your heart skipped a beat, curiosity mingling with anticipation. And then he reveals it—the pièce de résistance of the night—front-row tickets. Your eyes widen in disbelief as you take in the golden passes clutched in his hand. The surprise is so unexpected, so beyond your wildest dreams, that for a moment, time seemed to stand still and you forgot to breathe. The happiness you felt in that moment was indescribable.

"Tell me why, what I did to deserve such a perfect boyfriend." You asked, looking at him.

"Oh, it's just the way I love you."

The realization sinks in: you're not just witnessing the ERAS Tour from the front row; you're living it, breathing it, and becoming a part of it. Having front row seats hits different. As the final notes reverberated through the air, Mattheo's grin was infectious. His hand found yours, and together, you stood, cheering and applauding, celebrating not just the night but how far you'd come.

As the concert came to an end, the world seemed a little brighter, a little more alive. The memory of the evening was etched into your heart, a tale of love, surprises, and a music that binds you and Mattheo in a way that's uniquely yours.

"I can't believe it's time to go." You said sad about it ending.

"yeah. So did you like it?" Mattheo asked.

"Long story short it was the best day of my entire life." You said.

And with that you exited the venue.

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*＊*•̩̩͙

Thanks for reading! hope you liked itttt! I love this idea sm xx have a nice dayy

[heavensent2001]

The Style Evolution of JT: From Federal Prison to City Cinderella ✨

3 minute read

As one half of the rap duo the City Girls, rapper JT’s fashion was not a main talking point in her career. Now, as an emerging solo artist, JT arguably has some of the best fashion in the entire music industry. From working with brands such as Poster Girl and Mowalola, it’s clear that JT is the perfect fashion icon for the girls that get it.

At the beginning of her career, (2017 ish) JT wore almost exclusively designer brands, reminiscent of someone who just came into a large sum of money. She was dripped out in Dolce and Gabbana, Chrome Hearts, and Moschino - all brands popular for their very large price tags. But as the old saying goes: Just because you have money, doesn’t mean you can dress. To be clear, JT had money AND was into fashion before starting her rap career (she stated in an interview she was able to buy herself a Classic Chanel bag before the fame). In my opinion, her industry connections after she signed to record label Quality Control helped her focus not so much on wearing expensive clothes. Instead, seasoned stylists and designers helped her craft her own unique aesthetic, while focusing on pieces that accentuate her silhouette and new tax bracket.

JT pictured with fellow City Girl Yung Miami (left)

JT made her daring new style debut at the 2023 MTV VMA’s, sporting a pink, Mirror Palais ss24 gown and matching Marc Jacobs boots. This look (one of my favorites) was a turning point in her fashion career. It showed that she was more in tune with the fashion world. By wearing a lesser known designer, her affinity for big label brand flashiness was over. Now, I viewed her as a true fashion girlie, by sourcing and styling runway and archival pieces. Her unique style, which incorporates the “coquette” aesthetic, features latex pieces, corsets, platforms shoes, choker necklaces, and dainty bows. It is a style distinct to her, and not many could pull it off without looking crazy.

JT is on her way to becoming a fashion icon. Her outfits are always daring, meticulous, and true to her, which is the most important thing in fashion. She often collaborates with female designers and doesn’t care if you like what she’s wearing or not. In an iconic line from her song No Barz, she brags about being a “Hood bitch dressed like a weirdo”, to which I must agree. JT is a “weirdo” in the best way possible. Her unique fashion sense and dedication to it is refreshing and inspiring for girls that look like her and myself. JT is currently doing a club run tour in the United States, while steadily building a strong, supportive fan base. I am very excited to see all the iconic looks to come in this new era of her career!

by Heaven Sent ™

[holygraund]

🌅🌅🌅

hi hi hi, how are you today? how is you day going? 💛

I can't believe this year is over, especially in the swiftie side of tumblr it feels a lot has happened that my brain cannot even comprehend 🤯

would you mind sharing with me three things you are grateful for from this year? :)

also, would you mind sharing what were your favorite blogs this year? Just trying to spread some positivity ;)

(if you answer this ask, could you please tag it #sunlightanon?)

- ☀️

i just want to say this first: i just came back from my eras tour movie and it's a blast i had so much fun singing and dancing into the new year with my fellow swifties and during love story a stranger girl next to me asked me to marry her and IT WAS SO FUN.

being a swiftie on here is always what i'm grateful for. this fandom, this place, this blog is my safe place. getting to watch a sports meet i planned for ages and having seen the ppl i want to see is also a great thing that happened to me this year. And last but not least i have made a very good friend. i don't even think i'm capable of doing that but i have this year! that's a boost for my self-esteem.

my favorite blogs this year, um, i want to say everyone on my dash? but if i have to name a few now: @hits-differently @treacherous @tayloralison @homewithmycats @paintedmesgolden @felicitysmoak @lovestory @workbtch @thesonofneptune @alltoowsll @breakbleheavens and really, EVERYONE ELSE!!!

it's already 2024 where i'm at so happy new year! to you and everyone who reads this! wish you have a wonderful year!

[the-dubstep-strawberry]

People I'd like to know better

Tagged by: @dramaticmusicplaying - thank you!

Last Song: Too Many Questions by NERO.

Favorite Color: Pink, Black, Pastels, Light Gray.

Last Book Read: I'm currently working my way through the Alfred Hitchcock: The Three Investigators series (I loved these stories when I was a kid, and I'm doing a re-read after finding out that Cameron Monaghan played Bob Andrews in a 2007 adaptation), but I'm just about to start "American Prometheus: The Triumph and Tragedy of J. Robert Oppenheimer", by Kai Bird and Martin J. Sherwin.

Last Movie: Twisters (in the movie theater); Gremlins (today with the group chat friends and fam - we're doing classic and/or unhinged Christmas movies for the next month).

Last Show: Only Murders In The Building.

Sweet/Savory/Spicy: Sweet. I'm probably putting my dentist's kids and grandkids through college.

Relationship Status: Married, for quite a few years now! Hubs and I are about to celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary.

Last thing I looked up: The current stats on my fanfic.

Current Obsession: I'm being completely normal about Fallout 4, the two new sports anime series I'm watching with a bestie, NERO's new album (Into The Unknown is definitely my EDM release of the year), expanding my Titanic jewelry collection, and trying to get my hands on a copy of the Taylor Swift Eras Tour book (apologies in advance to all the other Swifties I may be required to trample at Target on Black Friday - your service will be honored).

Looking Forward To: Season 2 of Andor, the second season of Oxventure's Deadlands campaign, Sk8 The Infinity's upcoming OVA, an eventual release date for the second season of the Fallout TV show, more D&D with friends, the blue willow pattern cushions I ordered for the house, and most of all, having a really nice lunch with Hubs somewhere fancy for our anniversary.

Tagging @theartofblossoming, @thegreatdivide, @flammabel, @animatedjen, @noire610 and anyone else who would like to do this too!

[swiftstylesecrets]

Hi, I’m Destiny! ⭐️

I’m 25 years old (26 in December) and I live in Tennessee. Just your local espresso martini drinking, classic literature reading, sports watching, fan girling, childless cat lady. I’m a lover of all the eras, but I gravitate toward Midnights, Folklore, and Tortured Poets the most.

I’ve adored Taylor’s evolution of style for many years, so this space is meant to display my appreciation for her wardrobe. I’ve been wanting to start this account for quite some time, but I never felt like there was space for it until now. Welcome to your new favorite source for the details of Taylor Swift’s wardrobe and more. From The Eras Tour to Arrowhead. 🤍

[heda-heather]

Hi! So I’m fairly new to the Kaylor space but just wanted to point out that people here are some of the nicest and most welcoming fans here so thank you for that!

On my other note, I think the one thing that has been most frustrating about this PR stunt (yes, I’m calling 100% calling it like it is) is that Taylor’s accolades and accomplishments are being put on the back burner. She is still selling out stadiums all over the world but I hardly hear about it anymore. Like this woman literally made history last week at the Grammys and if I googled her name right now, all that comes up is this stupid relationship with tr*vis. I literally saw on twitter today, swifties breaking down if she could make it to KC for the parade celebration tomorrow before she flies to Australia…LIKE WHAT.

I’m just exhausted by this whole charade and hopes it ends sooner rather than later.

First of all, welcome fam! I do love this little corner of the internet. Some people think we’re crazy but lately it feels like we’re the only sane ones left 😂

I agree 100%. I can���t tell you how sick I am of watching powerful, intellectual women shrink themselves to support average men. What I don’t understand is why her “fans” aren’t more concerned about things like… her health, her tour that she’s put so much energy into creating for us, her continued achievements… and so on.

She has showed up to this man’s games more than a gf with a regular 9-5 schedule would. He’s done very little in return.

It’s all just bleh. And honestly, seeing how much money it brought into the NFL? I can’t help but think… couldn’t you have made a deal with a women’s sports league? Where actual funds and attention could be impactful?

It’s def not my favorite era. But, she’s got her reasons and we’ll just hold on tight.

[coiajm]

my theories on parx’s most recent post!

as all of us parxies know, waterparks uploaded the following picture, a neon green gradient background with three horizontally parallel black dots… interesting..

now, this photo could mean many things. there has been a recent discussion, especially on twitter, as to what this is, some of which I have thought of in the following:

a new album? already? that’s highly unlikely. personally, I doubt it.

a deluxe addition of intellectual property? hmm.. maybe.. however, parx has never even come out with a deluxe addition, let alone really mention one.

a new demo album? this is my personal favorite, considering it does line up with what awsten has said in the past when IP was competing with metallica on some buttfuck british charts..

a new tour announcement? maybe new dates? maybe asia tour dates!? (we can only hope, sending all my love to parxies who live in asia ❤️‍🩹)

you know, all of those technically are all in the realm of possibility.. but maybe that’s not it? they do say, “all good things come in three”, hmm.. kinda like the three horizontally parallel grenades in double dare!?

these kinda leads into the next theory..

is parx coming to an end!?

I’ve heard some theories in this already, even from when before IP was even announced. sure, it gets annoying, but it also gets to my head.. I truly doubt that they’re disbanding anytime soon, but what if..?

after all, three dots does usually represent the end of something, it also represents silence, a disappearance..

but hey, that’s me just thinking the worst, right? (haha, right..?)

a connection to fandom.. perhaps?

our beloved third studio album! our favorite hatred spiked album ! that also revolves around .. green ? neon green ? cough cough.

(if i’m being honest, intellectual property does have kinda the same energy as fandom. lyrically wise, that is. but out of all the albums, those seem to match the most.)

but..

the STARS!

now riddle me this, motherfuckers, why would the stars only return for the IP era ? why weren’t the stars there before fandom, now that we think about it.. and the weird thing is, the stars only came back in the era that was HINTING green .. green like FANDOM! FANDOM WITH THE STARS. BITCH!?

what could this mean?

I mean, It could easily mean that we’re just having another green era? but why would awsten repeat a colour? that’s right, he wouldn’t. would he? i’m spiraling..

I mean, his star makeup at four chord was smudged, and that was the first time too, does this mean we’re fading away into another era? another green era?

otto was a hint all along..

going back to “all good things come in three”.. do y’all remember otto’s cheek makeup?! literally the same as the photo.

(omg.. otto solo album 😍 he’s my bias)

(…i’m joking...)

yeah, there’s really no theory here.. just the fact that these mfs were hiding it on otto’s CHEEK. damn. sneaky bitches. I guess it is weird.. geoff had a heart (which now that i’m thinking.. could be another sign..), and otto had three dots?

my last theory for now!

this is less of a theory, and more of me pointing out the obvious. (the obvious that we never saw.)

awsten was sporting neon green all the time. EVERYWHERE!

seriously, how did we not see it? we’re so fucking out of touch that we just okayed awsten having a neon- *gags* neon green phone case!? nah.

just look at this:

also, maybe this is a reach.. but i don’t think so.. so, our last era was GH, right? rainbow hair? well.. look at the colour of his phone case then..

DING DING!!

It’s red! just like how RED was the next era. so, this leaves me no choice to believe that his next era will (maybe?) be green..? again..? hm, weird..

SO. sorry if that was all over the place. this was more just for me to unrot my brain a little about this! sorry!

love youuuu 🫧

- arlo

[taylorrepdetective]

NFL just started back up. Literally. Taylor continues to [potentially] spread her reach in new ways. Now it’s not just girls, it’s their boyfriends and husbands who want to see what she’s up to.

These are not bad points. She’s been all over sports all year, with baseball players, football players (Aaron Rogers went to eras too) and race car drivers (not just my boy Alonso) being interviewed about their favorite Taylor songs. Her popularity has broken containment already.

But I would urge caution, and as I said watch and wait a bit before getting too excited or worked up about this. We are at step 2, and The Messenger isn’t People or even The Sun.

First of all, we don’t know if this rumor will go any further. If it does a fling is most likely

Second of all, we don’t know if his people are the ones doing it. He is nearing retirement age and is looking for a post-football career, appears to be good looking, clean, charming, and well spoken, so he probably wants to do something like TV analysis, maybe something bigger (think Michael Strahan, or The Rock) and this will help him with star power and name recognition. Whether it goes any further or not.

Thirdly if I was a famous eligible bachelor, I would absolutely claim my spot as Taylor next maybe boyfriend. There is absolutely no harm in it and only an upside, even if she were to vehemently deny the rumor.

I also would caution some of the arguments I’ve seen that this definitely won’t happen because: 1) he has an on again-off again girlfriend. Calvin literally broke up with his girlfriend to date Taylor and then got back together with her immediately after. So did Matty (though it wasn’t a serious girlfriend in his case.) And the football season just starting and him not having any time for it just is a plus in my book. A built in excuse for them to almost never be seen together. Matty was on tour. Joe was in London and filming movies all the time in the early days. They only need to be seen twice at the beginning then every 6 months to seem real. And then they have the perfect “their schedules made it too hard” excuse when they break up. I AM NOT SAYING THIS MEANS THEY ARE TOGETHER. Just that these arguments don’t mean anything because even if they become a “couple” it’s not real and so they don’t have to behave in a logical way that real couples behave.

So again, wait and see. I would bet whichever way it goes we will know quickly.

[lepetitfruit]

Helloooo I actually know like nothing about you what kind of music do you like what artists do you want to see in concert etc etc

Also what’s your favorite creature that lives in the ocean

Hi!! Ty for the ask <3 so delightful

My music tastes are kinda everywhere(i listened to 86 genres this year!), but recently I've been really into indie and alt rock stuff :) my absolute favvvv band right now is The Happy Fits, they have really great high energy songs that I just wanna move to! Their song Too Late is the BEST I have it on like. 3 or 4 seperate playlists rn. I'm also a huge fan of like soft and sad music? Idk what the actual genre is. Think Renee Rapp and Conan gray.

I would really love the see the happy fits in concert(I think they just finished a tour recently too) but they don't tour internationally :( Renee Rapp does tour internationally(one of my friends went to her concert and sent me videos!!!) But I don't live in the two(2) canadian cities that artists go to soooo.... yeah. Tbh I would also really love to go to a one republic concert(they were my #1 on spotify this year!) For some reason even their new songs feel super nostalgic to me, idk but I'm sure it would be a blast!

Though I have seen lots of comedians in person, the only concert I've ever been to was Marianas trench like... 6? Ish? Years ago?

Hmmmm my favorite creature that lives in the ocean has to be a sunfish! I read this post last year(?) Talking about how they're really ridiculous and bad at surviving and now I think about their silly huge dish bodies and smile :)

Speed round! (Bonus facts)

- I loooovveeee star wars, esp prequel Era stuff. The jedi brainrot is real

- one of my favorite book genres is called "space opera" and yes that's as ridiculous as it sounds

- I have been in practically every sport you can think of and several youve almost definitely never heard of. My family is Just Like That. In their defense I'm also kinda Just Like That soooo

This has been so much fun!!! What about you? What's your music taste? Are there any comedians you want to see? And what's your favorite bird and bug?

[jellyfish-er]

I just want to write to my younger self. She was not okay. If I could go back and tell her everything I know know I would. I would save her from this cruel world. I would tell her how well were doing now and how we are thriving. I would tell her not not kill herself. I would tell her she has so much to live for. I want to give 6th grade me all the boy advice if ever received. It could protect her from so much sexual harassment and body shaming/dysmorphia. I would tell her how our math teacher doesn’t bully us any more and the bullying got a little bit better. I would show her how our friend group loves us so much. I want to show her the difference in our singing and how far we’ve come and how much more confident and comfortable we are with being onstage. She could see how well she does with the costume crew and how much she would love musicals. She would see how she was immediately picked for costume manager. She would know that she was picked out of 300 kids to show a girl from Ukraine around. She would know that she was picked again to show another girl around. She would see how far she has come. She would learn that she will become comfortable with her sexuality. She will discover how much she truly loves books. She will learn to over come the drama but still have an appropriate amount of gossip. She will get over crushes and end up head over heels for her best friend. She would learn that she will attend the eras tour twice and see her life role model in person and less than 100 feet from her. I will teach her to cut toxic people out of her life. I would show her that she is on the best JV color guard team in New England. (Literally) She would see that her sport that she just joined will be her passion and favorite thing. She will become a champion in just that. She will achieve her goal of learning a J toss and she would not only learn to use a riffle (real and equipment) but she would be extremely skilled at it. She will learn how to manage her anxiety, adhd, ptsd and depression. She will learn that the new friends she made would be the ones she will keep for a lifetime. Lastly she will learn that she will ever e happy and not just fake happy.

[sportsthoughts]

get to know you tag gaaaame

tagged by @timbitshockey <3

do you make your bed? I feel attacked sitting here on my unmade bed. I do try. I am very organised in other aspects of my life. I normally half heartedly fling the covers across the bed to cover it and call it a day. I am a never in the bedroom except to sleep person so I don't really see it until it's time for bed again. And when husband is home he makes the bed very very beautifully and precisely and my efforts are quite pathetic in comparison

what's your job? Professional Feelings Expert. More therapists are tumblr girlies than you'd think. Currently setting up my own practice and doing some various bits and bobs and agency therapy work on the side.

if you could go back to school, would you? Always always! I have to do a lot of ongoing training for work so I think my next thing will either be training in couples work or maybe some nutrition stuff because I'm very interested in the link between mental health and diet atm.

can you parallel park? I have a driving license that says yes but I have not sat behind the wheel of the car since... 2019? 2018? I am quite a liability on the road and have been Banned from driving Mr sportsthoughts' car because I have been known to crash quite a lot. Just as well I like being chauffeured/walking better anyway.

do you think aliens are real? I think there's some bacteria out there somewhere but I don't think it would be life as we'd recognise it.

can you drive a manual car? 99% of people in the UK learn to drive manual and take a manual driving test so they can do both! So technically, yes, I can. I'm not good at it though.

guilty pleasure? Not guilty about it ever but sports! Sports and sports fandom has always been my little 'me time' hobby.

tattoos? Nope! I can't think of anything that I'd like the look of so much I'd want to see it on my skin forever. My taste changes all the time so I would never be able to commit to a design.

favorite color? greens. neutrals. pastels!

favorite type of music? I like a lot of old stuff! 80s stuff, 70s stuff, also currently binge listening to miss swift ahead of the eras tour in London.

do you like puzzles? Jigsaw puzzles? Yes. I find them very soothing. Brain teaser puzzles? No!

any phobias? Spiders. So badly. Anything with lots of eyes. The dark.

favorite childhood sport? Sailing! I sailed competitively until I was about 15 and still get dragged out with my parents a lot. It was an all encompassing family activity that took over basically every weekend of my childhood.

do you talk to yourself? Yes, all the time. I like to narrate my life! Sometimes in conversation with people/myself/man in the sky etc. Often just me talking to me

tea or coffee? Both! One coffee in the morning and probably about 4-5 cups of tea throughout the day. Always English breakfast tea with milk, no sugar

first thing you wanted to be be when growing up? I have never had lofty career aspirations! I have always been quite interested to see where I would end up - and I had quite a roundabout journey getting to my current career! I think I went through the usual phases of wanting to be a popstar or a princess or a mermaid but I never really lusted after work or aspired to grow up and have a job. I still don't lol. I have a very good work life balance and even though I love my job and see it very much as a forever career it is probably the least important part of my life.

what movies do you adore? I have a running joke that I hate watching films I haven't seen before. I am a serial repeater and like to watch the same things over and over. A selection: Lord of the rings - especially the second one Twilight and New Moon Jackass - all of them - Rocky you reminded me of this and whenever people ask about my sense of humour I say "Jackass" and mean it. Live action Cinderella Oklahoma - the stage recording The first three Pirates of the Caribbean White Christmas - perhaps my favourite film ever? Shrek 1 & 2 - another contender for favourite film ever. Any 90s Disney. A Knight's Tale Ferris Bueller's Day Off Hairspray!!! Can't believe I nearly left out Justin Bieber Never Say Never. The first movie I binged watched. That and 1D this is us were on a constant loop when I was a teenager. My poor parents. Tagging @robindrake13 @prettyhockey @icedbatik @coffee-at-annies @cornerihaunt @reavenedges-lies and anyone else who fancies it - feel free to say I tagged you because truthfully I'm nosy and want to know you all

[kabillieu]

I'm not really a Taylor Swift fan, but I've been really happy to see all the interest in her Eras tour this summer. I feel about Taylor how I feel about sports. It's something I don't necessarily get, but I do get the feelings people have about them. I understand Sports Feelings, even though I don't like sports, and I understand Taylor Swift Feelings, even though I only like a handful of her songs.

There's this newsletter I subscribed to recently, Girl Culture, by one of my favorite critics and writers, and she wrote about attending one of Taylor's concerts and about how attending a stadium concert takes a lot of work. You have to get the tickets and do the planning and figure out logistics. How to get there and get home. That helped my brain understand something that I have never, ever been able to understand on my own. I have always wanted any fun I have to be effortless. I don't want to work for it. This is why I don't like vacation planning. But you do have to work to have fun. You simply do. And I need to grow up and accept that. All I did this summer was work hard for the moments of fun I was able to scratch out, and you know what? It was worth it. It was difficult, it was a lot of work, but we made the best of bad situation.

The best part of the summer was visiting Dominic in Vegas. It was a lot of work, but it takes work to have fun! (this is now my mantra). This is only the second time in nearly 12 years of being a parent that I've been on vacation alone with my spouse. It was just what we both needed: being outside of the routines of caregiving, in an entirely new place that has no connection to our identities as parents. I'm really, really grateful for that time we had, and I wish it were possible for us to have the opportunity to be away alone together more frequently.

I don't love how busy and hectic my life is these days. In fact, I sort of hate it. But it's just not possible to slow down right now. And there is a lot of fun to be had along the way, but I am going to have to work for it. Any professional fun: I have to work for it. Any recreational fun: I have to work for it. Anything worth doing: I have to work for it.

So I am trying to resolve myself to the work. It's here anyway, so I might as well reframe it in my mind as a means necessary to get to the fun.

[awesomewithoutme]

okkkk, got some questions here

• fav color?

• last movie you watched?

• coolest kitchen appliance?

• what type of bread do you like?

• do you have a favorite shape?

• where is the best place for laying down?

• a person you can’t live without?

• do you like cheese?

• most recent pastime?

• what’s the most useless sport?

(these are all asking for your opinions! i’d love to here ‘em)

Omg thanks!

Pink!

The Eras Tour Movie!

Toaster! It literally spits bread!

Toasted.

Hearts ❤️

Bed. Preferably on my side or on my stomach.

Ooh, hard question, but I'm gonna pick someone I know irl, a celebrity, and a tumblr mutual. My mom, Taylor Swift, and @mykilljoyhq (hi! Hope you don't mind me tagging u!)

I used to love eating cheese! But I can't eat most cheeses anymore. The only cheese I can eat is cooked cheese, like a grilled cheese sandwich.

Exploring tumblr is kinda my new pastime!

Tbh most sports besides the Olympics are useless to me.

Thank you for the asks! Have a great day/night!

[sunset-telepath]

Okay so what are your least favorites from each Taylor album??

I'm so glad you asked! I have prepared a list of what I consider to be the flops from each Taylor Swift album, which I humbly display to the grand court of the Swiftie public so that I may have tomatoes pelted into my face for my terrible brilliant opinions. And not only will I provide the songs I think are skips, I'll also provide my favorite songs from each album too! So more people can think I'm tasteless!

@orangejuicepdf I laughed at your opinions, it's only right you laugh at mine.

The scale goes from most not-favorite to least not-favorite on (skips) and most-favorite to least-favorite on (favs)

Debut (Skips):

Stay Beautiful (cORy'S eYeS aRE LiKe tHe jUnGLe)

Invisible (boring)

Should've Said No (we've been brainwashed by the Rep tour mash-up of it and Bad Blood into thinking it's a great song. Maybe it is, but the vocals are terrible and I can't wait for the re-recording)

Debut (Favs):

Teardrops on My Guitar

Our Song

Picture to Burn

Tim McGraw

Beautiful Eyes EP (Favs):

I Heart ? (the unknown superstar)

Beautiful Eyes (eaten up by I Heart ? and kind of mid)

The Taylor Swift Holiday Collection (Skips):

Santa Baby (Taylor is not (yet) a seductress)

The Taylor Swift Holiday Collection (Favs):

Last Christmas (one of the first songs I heard by Taylor on the radio as a toddler. rewired my brain into becoming a brainless stan)

Fearless (Skips):

Hey Stephen

You All Over Me

Jump Then Fall

Love Story (too hetero)

Fearless (Favs):

Forever & Always

Come in With the Rain

The Other Side of the Door

Untouchable

You Belong With Me

Superstar

The Way I Loved You

That's When

Don't You

Speak Now (Skips):

Innocent (I am not interested in Kanye Apologia)

Never Grow Up (boring)

Castles Crumbling

Speak Now (Favs):

I Can See You (Oh taylor you argumentative, antithetical, horny dream girl)

Last Kiss

Haunted

Electric Touch

Back to December

Foolish One

The Story of Us

Long Live

When Emma Falls In Love

Mine

Enchanted (lower on the list of favs because the Eras Tour Version makes it worse via comparison)

Red (Skips):

The Lucky One (replacement for Nothing New bc she couldn't sing about getting drunk at a bar yet. Also the fact that she wrote it about Joni Mitchell, who proceeded to say that Taylor couldn't sing)

Babe (sorry but it's a nothing surrounded by supermodels)

Ronan

too sad :(

Red (Favs):

Treacherous (the motif of two bright lights shows up in a lot of Taylor's best work)

The Last Time

The Moment I Knew

All Too Well

State of Grace

Red

I Almost Do

Sad Beautiful Tragic

Come Back... Be Here

Better Man

Forever Winter

Run

I Knew You Were Trouble

We Are Never Getting Back Together

22

The Entire Goddamn Album this was seriously one of the greatest albums of all time. Every song is amazing (except for the Lucky One and Babe, which aren't even bad they're just not as great as these other songs). I can't believe this lost to fucking that RAM shit. There's a special spot in hell for those grammy voters. Every single song is brilliant and amazing and really shows Taylor's maturation from Speak Now to 1989.

1989 (Skips):

Slut!

(Taylor babe you cannot convince me that Harry Styles is a gentleman in a world of boys)

This man Taylor? This man?

How You Get The Girl (I'm gay)

1989 (Favs):

Blank Space (my psycho queen. I know it's a parody but if it was 100% serious I would probably stan harder. go wreck that man's sports car. I'll help)

Style

Out Of The Woods

All You Had To Do Was Stay

Bad Blood (Go Queen! End Katy Perry's Career!)

Wildest Dreams

Say Don't Go

Now That We Don't Talk

Is It Over Now?

Wonderland

You Are in Love

New Romantics

This Love

Clean

This is seriously another one of the greatest albums of all time.

Reputation (Skips):

New Year's Day (don't get tricked by the supposedly deep lyrics. This is not a good song. It is the poor man's Daylight)

Reputation (Favs):

Look What You Made Me Do (the empress herself)

Ready for it?

Don't Blame Me

End Game

So It Goes...

Getaway Car

Call It What You Want

Gorgeous

Delicate

King of My Heart

Lover (Skips): (you all are going to come for my neck for this)

Miss Americana (please don't take me back to highschool)

Soon You'll Get Better

False God

Daylight (the poor man's Afterglow)

Lover (Favs):

Afterglow

Cornelia Street

Need (from the Lover Leak... c'mon Taylor drop this please)

You Need to Calm Down (I'll be hung for this one)

All of the Girls You've Loved Before (leaked, released officially under the Cruelest Summer EP)

It's Nice to Have a Friend (it's a fun experimental track)

Folklore (Skips):

peace/hoax (good songs but I feel as though they're songs that only Taylor will ever truly understand)

Exile (The Last Time's runt sister that you insist on giving more attention then the queen that The Last Time is)

Folklore (Favs):

The Lakes (THE grand high queen of my pretentiousness)

Illicit Affairs

This is Me Trying

Epiphany

August

Seven

The 1

Evermore (Skips):

Cowboy Like Me ("Telling all the rich people what they want"?? Taylor you are the rich person)

Coney Island (yawn)

Happiness (the poor man's tolerate it)

Evermore (Favs):

Right Where You Left Me

Tolerate It

'Tis the Damn Season

Ivy

Evermore

Gold Rush

Midnights (Skips):

Labyrinth (deeply terrible)

You're On Your Own Kid (boring)

Glitch (it hits at 3 AM reading infidelity smut but.... other than that it's not that good)

Karma ft. Ice Spice (we really couldn't get Nicki Minaj? Or someone with talent? I would've taken Doja Cat. Or even Saweetie :sob:)

Midnights (Favs):

Question...? (oh she was nuts for putting this out when she was still dating the Heirloom Turkey... I have no choice but to stan)

Maroon

Hits Different (I too will be carried away to a mental asylum some day)

Would've Could've Should've

Sweet Nothing

Anti Hero

Lavender Haze

Dear Reader

Snow on the Beach (ft. More Lana Del Rey)

High Infidelity

Bejewled

Bigger Than the Whole Sky

Karma

The Great War

Vigilante Shit

Paris