#my mom keeps telling me to just get a job again and let a regular schedule help me

[ittybittyfanblog]

Error 404: (Self-Aware!AU, Sylus Edition)

Summary: A LADS self-aware!AU featuring Sylus (+ maybe the other MLs!) and an oblivious player. That’s it, that’s the plot. Tags: player!reader x sylus, fem!reader x sylus, reader x lads, maybe some suggestive language?? will add more tags as the story progresses A/N: This is gonna be a multi-chapter fic! I’m still not sure whether to do the boys in rotation, or just focus on one ML per series. Don’t take my word for it atp tho – I’m not even sure if I can actually finish a series lol.  Also, I’ve had the creative liberty of changing stuff from the actual gameplay here and there. (Except for the self-awareness. That’s most definitely real.) Hope you enjoy~!

Pt. 1 - Pt. 2 - Pt. 3

It’s a quarter past eight and you’re still on your desk working overtime on a Friday night. 

You let out a big sigh, leaning back on your office chair after an unhealthy duration of bad posture from hours of slouching down in front of your computer. There’s nothing ergonomic about the way this job is killing you, and the ache in your lower back can attest to that. 

An irate orange tabby plops himself in front of you, blocking your view of the glaring screen and you figure that it’s time for a break. 

“Me-oow.”

“I know, I know,” You answer tiredly, standing up to dodge a stray paw clawing your way and you hear cracks in three different places that are honestly unbecoming of a woman your age. You haven’t even reached thirty yet, for god’s sake. “I’m a bad mother. But mom also had to skip dinner to make it to the seven PM meeting, so cut me some slack, okay?” 

A high-pitched “meooowr!” is the only response you get; it seems like there’s no excusing late dinner time this time around. 

As much as you’d like to hem and haw and complain, the main reason why you’re still keeping this job is because you can work remotely. If it weren’t for the fact that you’re stuck most days at home working hours past your regular nine to five, having to be on-call around the clock at all times, and that you’ve consumed more sodium than a nitrite victim with the way you live off cup ramen, then, really, it beats working in an office where you’d physically have to clock in and out from exactly nine to five. 

Your right eye twitches. No, I have not fallen in love with the system that exploits me, thank you very much. 

“Here is your Fancy Feast, your highness,” you tell the hungry feline who’s already ignoring the hand that feeds for the bowl full of white fish paté. He eats healthier than you, sure, but you work like this for him to eat like this. The life of a single mom is an uphill battle, but extremely rewarding. 

You raise your hand to pat your son’s head lovingly, aborting the gesture halfway when you hear a warning growl. Alright, tough crowd. 

After nuking a half-eaten takeout box in the microwave and grabbing a cold Bundaberg from the fridge, you hunker down on the “chaise lounge” (see: an old wingback and a rattan ottoman you’ve refurbished as a makeshift seat a few weeks back when you had guests over) for a late meal. 

You barely register the taste of lukewarm rice on your tongue, mouth moving mechanically while your mind runs on autopilot about everything and nothing at the same time. 

Maybe it’s time to check Jobstreet again

Is there like a laundromat near the area that’s open twenty four seven

Eugh, I hate cold peas

What do we feel about Chromakopia? 

I will… die alone

I really need to stock on some fresh produce this weekend–

Ping! 

A notification from your phone pulls you out of your thoughts – and like a well-trained dog pavlov’d into responding, you visibly perk up at the sight of your lock screen lighting up and the familiar banner you’ve already memorized by heart. 

Your Galaxy Explorer rewards are here. Did you put my hotel’s address as the shipping address? 

Ah, just like clockwork. 

You press on it with a quiet, bubbling anticipation, chewing on the plastic spork as you wait impatiently for the silly mobile game that’s been your short respite at intervals – for more than you’d care to admit – to boot up. 

Offhandedly, you wish that the devs would add more variations to the game’s push notifications; more random, personalized stuff like maybe a reminder to drink water, or a fun update about their day. What you’d give – pay – for a: "Less on the overtime, kitten. I miss you,” dialogue from a certain character, but you digress. 

Oh, well. Probably better this way, lest you dig yourself deeper into delusion. 

The game greets you with the usual picturesque view of a silver-haired man sitting cross-legged on a chair, looking all the bit at ease in his signature crimson and white button up. The warm ambience of the Destiny Café at night draws you in, already pulling your attention away from the never-ending stream of thoughts in your brain. 

“Before seeing you, I thought today would be another dull day,“ Sylus comments airily. The way he drawls out the words in that deep timbre of his voice never fails to make your heart flutter – just a teeeensy bit.

“Ever the charmer,” you sigh happily in return, situating yourself more comfortably on the sofa, almost horizontal from how far you’re leaning back on the cushion. “You’re looking awfully normal tonight. What, no pineapple glasses for your favorite girl?” 

Having bypassed the initial cringe of talking to yourself after literal months of gameplay, it almost comes off natural, the banter. You’ve already accepted the fact that you’re crazy about a fictional, pixelated man – what’s pretending to have actual conversations with him gonna do? It’s not as if he actually hears you yap your nonsense; there are worse things in the world than a parasocial attachment to an otome game character. 

Your little jab at the sometimes random addition to his choice of attire earns you a laugh from the man itself– or at least it looks as though it does, making you blink momentarily in surprise. Happy coincidence, I guess.

You shake your head, cracking a smile, then proceed to do the routine of completing the daily agenda and then some. 

It’s tedious business, sure. You’ve dedicated hours upon hours on this game and you’re honestly starting to feel pretty bored with some of the gameplay elements, but you *do* like the ritualistic nature of ticking off the tasks one by one. It’s almost ironic – the way you dutifully do one thing after the other in this game, just to avoid the pile of work that’s waiting for you in real life. 

It’s not as if anything, or anyone’s relying on you to do your daily log-ins, so you suppose it’s due to that lack of pressure as well. 

Pulling yourself away from the five-star Xavier memory card you’ve grinded to level seventy, you stare despondently at the sad little 2 on your remaining energy. The embarrassing amount of materials you lack to ascend the card seem to mock you, even as you exit the Memories window. Another goal for another day, perhaps.

All tasks on the daily agenda are complete, except for one that you’ve always saved for last.

You’re met with a standing Sylus on the game’s home screen, arms crossed and wearing an expression you’d almost describe as impatient, if you didn’t know any better. The sight makes you grin. 

Cheekily, you poke his crotch.

You’re looking forward to getting a playful remark, or if you’re lucky, a blush along with an embarrassed retort about your shamelessness. 

 What you get, however, is a resounding scoff. Your eyes snap back to his face – from, ahem, your prolonged staring at the area below his waist – and you do see the familiar tinge of pink on his cheeks, but what he says in response catches you off-guard.

“You spend that much resource for a card that isn’t mine?” Sylus tsks, both his voice and expression coming across as… affronted? “Kitten, I’m actually hurt.” 

Huh?

You haven’t heard that line from him before. Was there a recent update you weren’t aware of? The man in question then appears to look amused, from the way you’ve been rendered speechless by the unexpected dialogue. 

All at once, you gasp when you realize what the new response means. 

“That’s so smart,” you say giddily. You see Sylus cock his head to the side, synchronously quirking an eyebrow—expectant. “They actually added a feature that lets them know which memory I’ve upgraded last, and make you react to it. Oh, that’s so cool!” 

If you weren’t too busy being excited over what you think is a new update from the game,  you’d see the chagrined look on Sylus’ face. But when you glance back at him, all trace of the emotion is gone before you could notice anything different. 

“Don’t worry, Crow Man. You’re still my favorite,” you assure him, making his mouth tick upwards in a semblance of a smile. He looks pleased all of the sudden, his demeanor shifting into something more relaxed.

Then a pout forms on your face. You crinkle your nose in frustration as you complain, “It’s just really hard to level your cards up at this point. It takes ages and a shit ton of energy just to level you up past seventy five.” Sighing, you add, kind of bitterly, “And I’m too broke to be spending money on growth packs.” 

Checking the time on your phone, you see that you’ve already spent more than an hour on your self-imposed break time and you know that you ought to get back to work soon. With a groan, you pull yourself to sit upright, savoring the last few minutes of free time before you slave off for the rest of the night. 

You’re about to clean up what’s left of dinner when you notice the oddly thoughtful look on Sylus’ face. 

There’s a deep furrow in his brows as he brings a hand up to cover his mouth. He closes his eyes shut for a few seconds. He's never done that gesture before... Ugh, he looks really hot–

Suddenly, you see a flicker— then a weird, sort of graphic distortion happening in the background. Uh, what??

A beat; then a glitch on the screen. “Ah, shit.” 

The game crashes.

You exhale loudly as the game’s interface goes back to the loading screen, tapping your thumb impatiently as the bar slowly loads to 15%... 50%..... 81%....... 

“Maybe make sure to patch up first before releasing an update next time, jeez— Huh?” 

For a quick second, nothing seems to be amiss. But then the first thing you see on the home screen is Sylus’ figure standing before you, wearing an expression one could only describe as a cat that ate the proverbial canary. 

He speaks— and it’s another intro you haven’t heard him say, ever. 

“You should’ve told me sooner, sweetie,” he almost coos the words out, making your eyes bug out in shock. 

“Now, why don’t you go check your–” he pauses, and his mouth moves as if he’s rolling the word out, testing it. “Inventory?” 

Sylus slides his gaze towards the upper left corner of the screen, a coy smirk still ever-present on his face. 

There, you see something you haven’t noticed earlier: two notification badges. One on your mailbox, and another on the Hunter’s Info tab. Bewildered, you press on the mail icon first, despite the insistence for you to start with the latter. 

You see a new message: [For You]

A small gift, to bridge our worlds closer. – S 

Nothing is attached to it. You read it twice, perplexed.  

“You’re quite the contradictorian, aren’t you?” Sylus tuts as soon as you return back to the home screen, his gaze boring into you even when he tilts his head sideways in mock exasperation. “Mmm, I suppose it doesn’t matter. Take all the time you need, sweetheart.” 

Helplessly, you open your inventory next. 

Your jaw drops. 

“What. The fuck,” You whisper to yourself, voice wavering in disbelief at what you’re seeing, and the sheer amount of what you’re seeing. “This– this can’t be real.” 

You see that all the materials you own, from the bottle of wishes to the ascension crystal boxes, have been multiplied a hundred times over.

And on top of that–

Ninety nine thousand red dias????

You cannot believe how this– this recent… update (or is it a bug? Infold sure isn’t this generous) didn't make the news. Even as someone as uninvolved as you are with the community and the game’s latest releases, something like this for sure would’ve made headlines on Twitter (X), at least. But you haven’t heard anything. Nada. 

Holy shit. 

You feel a little light-headed, both from incredulity and excitement. Needing a moment to calm yourself down, you exit the Inventory tab in a daze.

You stare at Sylus. He stares back at you with what looks to be mirth in his eyes. 

Skeptically, you mutter, “did–did I get hacked or something?” 

Anticipating another unexpected dialogue to prompt up, you wait for a full minute without saying anything else. And for a moment, the man in front of you looks indecisive, contemplative. 

There’s something very odd, very… human in the way he’s looking at you. He looks as if– as if he’s—

His face falls back into a neutral expression. Not unlike how his idle animation usually looks. 

..

…

….. It doesn’t seem like he’s going to initiate a conversation any time soon, so you hesitantly poke him on the nose. 

“Even in the worst-case scenario, there’s no need to panic.”

You’ve heard that one before.

So he’s back to normal now. You temper the small disappointment that blooms in your gut. 

Shaking your head slowly, you try to make sense of all the stuff that just happened, but a sharp bite on your ankle pulls you out of your reverie. 

“Ow–!” The sight of your cat flopping near your feet reminds you of the time. More importantly, the backlogs waiting for you at your desk. 

“Wait, shit– I gotta get back to work.” This… unbelievable stroke of good luck (?) is gonna have to take a backseat for now.

You grab the carton box and the half-empty bottle of sparkling peach as you stand up. Making quick work of throwing the container in the trash and gulping down the rest of your drink, you rush into your room and back in front of your PC. 

Cracking your knuckles, you gingerly set your phone against the monitor. Setting the timer to one hour in Quality Time, knowing fully-well that you’re going to have to keep extending it until the wee hours of the morning – or until your battery dies, whichever comes first – you give Sylus one last look, letting out a long exhale before locking in.

“Just keep me company for the night, alright? I’ll figure out what’s going on once my shift’s over.” 

It could just be your overactive imagination, but you swear you hear a quiet chuckle from the man polishing his gun in your peripheral.

[ghost-bxrd]

okay so this is an idea I’ve seen brought up maybe once before, but maybe Jason (before the Bats find out who he is) accidentally lets something slip that makes them realize that he’s literally, like, a child (seventeen, sixteen, I’m not sure how old he is at that point exactly, but either works)

and Bruce “adoption addiction” Wayne promptly looks at this obviously traumatized teenager and decides that he should adopt Red Hood.

I just think Jason would be so confused (maybe a little pissed too)

I’ve touched on that a little bit in What you’re longing for (you claim to abhor)!

I think this trope is wayyy underrated. Like, Jason is still so, so young. Basically a child. Even if he died at sixteen and then spent two years with the league (even if we’re counting the time he spent dead as aging). He’s barely even legal when he returns to Gotham. Or if we’re being generous let’s say he’s nineteen.

Doesn’t matter, he’s barely out of his teens (maybe he’s still IN his teens if you bend the timeline of your fic a little) and he’s experienced horrors that would have most people become utterly unable to function. But Jason? That boy takes his trauma and channels it into anger. Which, not exactly healthy, but well.

Anyway, getting off topic:

YES. Jason is still basically a kid when he debuts as the Red Hood, and you know what else he is? A good boy who’s not gonna touch any alcohol until he’s officially 21.

“But why would he do that? He grew up in Crime Alley! Ain’t nobody got time for age limitations!”

Hear me out! Let’s assume he grew up in a household where his father, Willis Todd, drank quite a lot on the regular in addition to his mom’s addiction. Jason experienced the aftermath of this (perhaps domestic violence?) every time his dad returned from a job/jail and he grew to loathe any and all substances, including alcohol. Knowing Jason and his convictions it wouldn’t be too far fetched to assume he’d never touch a single drop of alcohol at all.

So that’s one way he could slip up while taking to his goons (and having the bats overhear) or even straight up talking to one of them where maybe Dick banters a bit and goes “Hey, perhaps you should chill out a bit. Have a drink maybe” and Jason just instinctively goes “Fuck you Dickwing, I’m seventeen/eighteen/nineteen! I’m not allowed to drink!”

And Dick just— bluescreens. And immediately goes to tell Bruce, obviously.

OR

The Bats assume Jason is this old guy (Bruce’s or Drathstroke’s age maybe) and consequently they keep alluding to things that happened way before Jason was ever even born and at first he’s so? Confused??? But eventually it just gets really annoying and eventually he just— snaps.

“How the fuck would I know which Nokia gen hit the market that year? I was born in fuckin’ XXXX, I’m an iPhone kid!”

“Stop referencing the Cold War dipshit, I’m fucking seventeen! I’m glad I remember my own damn birthday!”

“I don’t know, I was like— two back then.”

Bruce, obviously, would take .1 seconds to realize:

“Omg. That’s- that’s a whole child. That’s a whole damn TRAUMATIZED child, killing people and sawing off heads. Omg someone must have hurt him so bad. Don’t worry tho, son, Batman’s got you. You won’t have to hurt anybody ever again. We’re here for you. Would you like the room next to Tim’s or Dick’s?”

Meanwhile Jason: “what the fuck”

[gyeomsweetgyeom]

[4:28 pm]

“Just trust me. I’ve watched my mom make these a million times. I could make them with my eyes closed, even while sleeping!” Haechan had reassured. And you went along, following his directions, setting the heat on the oven, getting out the trays and the appliances to start making the cookie dough.

“So we need, one stick of butter and 2 cups of sugar first,” he mumbled to himself, plopping in a cold stick of butter and the full 2 cups of sugar into the mixing bowl. The mixer turned on and immediately started throwing around the hard stick of butter and flinging sugar out of the mixing bowl. “Huh, it never does this at my mom’s.”

“Are you sure the butter didn’t need to be melted or room temperature at least?” You ask cautiously.

“Hush! I need to melt the butter. I’m so smart,” he tells himself with a smug smile while he plops the butter into a bowl. Haechan throws it into the microwave uncovered for entirely too long, leaving behind butter splattered throughout the inside of the microwave.

The mixer turns on again while you clean up the greasy mess, “Now we add 3 eggs, four and a half tablespoons of vanilla, and slowly add in the flour and salt mixture.”

You watch in a mix of apprehension and intrigue while he adds only one cup of flour to the batter and begins mixing on high speed.

“So, why couldn’t your mom make the cookies this year?” You ask over the sound of the mixer.

He rolls his eyes, “They decided to go on a tropical vacation this year for Christmas and I’m upholding tradition. She sent me the recipe, but I already know what I’m doing.”

You know he doesn’t know what he’s doing. The mixture is looking far too loose and wet compared to the cookies his mom has made every year during the holidays. You also know that for the last two Christmases you’ve been dating Haechan, he has been nowhere near the kitchen while the cookies are being made because his official job is “taste tester.” A job, his mother had told you last year, that was given to him so he would stop eating the cookie dough before it was baked. You just knew this batch of cookies was going to be bad.

“Usually my mom rolls these out so we can decorate, but I say that’s too much work. I’ll do some regular circles and only do a few with the cookie cutters,” he tells you while he pours the cookie dough out onto the un-floured counter top. That’s going to be a pain to scrape up.

The dough really looks more like a dense cake batter. There’s too much egg and not enough flour, you think he even added milk for some reason. You had tried earlier to show him another recipe and give input while he pulled out the ingredients but he told you he knew, and you just gave up.

To no one’s surprise the cookie cutter cookies did not keep their shape and all the cookies had spread from being too wet. The end result was a thin, crispy disc of… ingredients that looked nothing like his mom’s cookies.

“So… I suppose I did need the recipe,” Haechan smiles sheepishly, staring at the sheet tray of “cookies.”

You look at him incredulously, “Do you really think so? This one has egg shell in it, they’re all flat and nearly burnt. Are you sure you’ve watched your mom do this a million times?”

“Yeah… I lied about that. I’ve definitely eaten them about a million times, but watching her make them makes me hungry so I come back to give them a taste test. I figured it couldn’t be too hard,” he shrugs.

“She sent us the recipe earlier! All you had to do was look at the recipe!”

He waves you off, and reaches for a “cookie.” “I’m going to let my baking do all the talking,” he says before taking a bite. You watch his eyes widen at the unexpected crunchy texture. He crunches on the cookie and swallows with a grimace. “Delicious.”

You sigh deeply, “Clean up your mess while I write down the recipe.”

Haechan salutes while mumbling about how the “cookie” was stuck to his teeth and tasted like salty egg. You roll your eyes, transcribing the recipe onto a piece of paper. A recipe with more flour than sugar, no salt, one egg, and not half a bottle of vanilla extract.

Once the mess is cleaned up, you start measuring out the ingredients, “This time you’re listening to me. I don’t want to hear a peep from you about what I’m doing wrong. Got it?”

He nods at you and begins following your directions. He lowers the temperature on the oven, lines the baking sheets with parchment paper, and sprinkles flour onto the counter. This time making the cookies goes by much more smoothly and looks like what cookie making is supposed to look like.

You sit side by side on the floor in front of the oven as the cookies bake. You watch them slowly rise and spread just slightly, looking almost identical to the cookies Haechan’s mom makes every year.

“Thank you for making them for me,” he tells you softly, pulling your hand into his lap after pressing a gentle kiss to the back of it.

You lay your head on his shoulder, eyes locked on the glass of the oven, “Thanks for including me in your tradition.”

-

tagging! @nct127balls 

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.102 Negotiations

I thought about the whole money tree argument all night, and while I understood Sophia's concerns, it still didn't sit well with me. Dub's words from his note echoed in my head. "Financial freedom to pursue your dreams," he said. I knew she preferred to live a simple life, but didn't she have bigger dreams than just being married to me and raising our children? I heard the TV on, so I got up to address the topic again. My goal wasn't to change her mind—though I hoped she would—but to present my case coherently. I was blinded by the simoleons I didn't even have yet and failed to put a counteroffer on the table. If she could hear my thoughts, maybe she could see it in a different light.

"Good morning," I said.

"Have you ever seen this show? It's so fun!"

"Uhh...no. Can we talk?"

"Of course," she said, turning off the TV. "What's on your mind so early?"

"I want to revisit the money tree situation."

"Okay. Sure."

"You presented your reasons for limiting its use, but I don't think I did a good job explaining why I think we shouldn't, and I'd like you to hear what I think."

"Okay," she said slowly. "So, what's up?"

"You said it would be an insult to return the gift, but I think it would be an insult to ignore Dub's wishes."

Her eyebrow went up a little bit, but she was still tracking with me, so I went on.

"I understand your hesitation, but we don't have to let the money change anything about us. We can be ourselves, but with peace of mind and more opportunities. I think maybe your childhood is influencing how you're seeing this, but so is mine. I'm gonna tell you a different part of my story so you can see where I'm coming from."

"Sure."

"Okay..."

I took a deep breath and hoped my story would work some magic.

"You've been around my parents enough to know my mom is the one with the money."

"Yeah. That's obvious."

"Right. She spoiled us...she still does, heh. But we weren't spoiled brats. We had everything we needed, and a few things we wanted, but we didn't live extravagantly. We went to public school, wore regular clothes, and lived in a middle class neighborhood. For a long time, my mom had an office job. And even now, she still works her candle business. We weren't rich by any means. We were comfortable. I know this because when we went to my dad's house, it was not comfortable. He came home tired every day and didn't have the energy to spend time with us. He never took us anywhere, and there was nothing to do at his house-"

"But that's not what-"

"Wait. Let me finish. I haven't made my point yet."

"Okay. Sorry."

"My grandparents bought my mom a little house and gave her a chunk of money when she moved out so she could have peace of mind and time to explore the world and figure out what she wanted to do without the pressure of bills and working a job she hated."

Sophia nodded and smiled, giving me hope that my story already inspired her to change her mind.

"When we moved out, she did the same thing for us…except for the house, of course. It wasn't a ton of money, but I could have gotten a cheap apartment if I wanted to."

"Or a tiny house," she said, gesturing vaguely.

"Ha! Yeah, I could have afforded this. She's still taking care of us. I keep telling her she doesn't need to keep doing things for us, but all she says is when I have a child, I'll understand."

Sophia nodded.

"Yeah...I remember hearing her say that in Tartosa."

"Yeah... I may not have a child yet, but I do want to give it every opportunity I had and then some. I don't want it to worry and feel how we felt at my dad's house."

"I get that. I don't want that either."

"And what you said about your parents. They were older when they adopted you because it took forever to save the money. If we want to send off our children with a little something, we have to start saving now. We can't wait until a week before they're gone to start harvesting the tree. Maybe we don't take from it every day. Maybe just once or twice a week, or whenever we think about it. But just leaving the tree alone until we need it? That's not gonna give our children the kind of future I want them to have. I want to continue what my grandparents started. I don't think we should waste this opportunity."

She sat there, nodding and staring at me like she didn't realize I was done. But then she turned away, stared at the floor, and sighed.

"Wow... Your family history is filled with so much love and support."

I grabbed her hands, hoping to seal the deal and provide a little comfort.

"Yes. And you're part of that family now. I just want to continue the cycle. That's all. I don't want to start wearing labels and buy a big house in Del Sol. I just want to spend time with my family without consequence."

"I can't argue with that. I'm still not letting you give up on yoga, though."

I laughed. "I didn't expect you would."

"And to be clear," I continued, "I'm not gonna give up. I just don't want to be in a position where I'm still hustling and missing everything going on at home. You'll be here, so I know everything will be fine, but I want to be here too. I want our children to have all the benefits of living in a two-parent house."

"That's beautiful, Luca. I see the whole picture now. I've just decided I'm definitely not to going back to work."

I beamed at her.

"Really?? That's awesome! I love that for you."

"So, what do you think you'll do?"

"I don't know yet. I don't want to give up on teaching just yet, but I'll probably spend more time on SimTube. I have time to figure it out, though. Speaking of the hustle...I gotta go. I love you, Sophia. I love our life, and I can't wait to see how it turns out."

"I love you more!"

[feminist-space]

"Do’s and Don’ts of communication and dementia

You can’t control memory loss – only your reaction to it.

For people with dementia, their disability is memory loss. Asking them to remember is like asking a blind person to see. (Common questions like “Did you take your pills?” or “What did you do today?” are the equivalent of asking them to remember something.) A loss of this magnitude reduces the capacity to reason. Expecting them to be reasonable or to accept your conclusion is unrealistic. Don’t correct, contradict, blame or insist. Reminders are rarely kind. They tell a person how disabled they are – over and over again.

People living with dementia say and do normal things for someone with memory impairment. If they were deliberately trying to exasperate you, they would have a different diagnosis. Forgive them…always. For example, your wife isn’t purposely hiding your favorite pair of shoes. She thinks she’s protecting them by putting them in a safe place…and then forgets.

Here are some basic Do’s when it comes to communication with someone with dementia:

-Give short, one sentence explanations.

-Allow plenty of time for comprehension, and then triple it.

-Repeat instructions or sentences exactly the same way.

-Avoid insistence. Try again later.

-Agree with them or distract them to a different subject or activity.

-Accept the blame when something’s wrong (even if it’s fantasy).

-Leave the room, if necessary, to avoid confrontations.

-Respond to the feelings rather than the words.

-Be patient and cheerful and reassuring. Do go with the flow.

-Practice 100% forgiveness. Memory loss progresses daily.

Here are some Don’ts:

-Don’t reason.

-Don’t argue.

-Don’t confront.

-Don’t remind them they forget.

-Don’t question recent memory.

-Don’t take it personally.

We’ve put together some specific examples of good and bad communication below, keeping these do’s and don’ts in mind.

“What doctor’s appointment? There’s nothing wrong with me.”

Don’t: (reason) “You’ve been seeing the doctor every three months for the last two years. It’s written on the calendar and I told you about it yesterday and this morning.”

DO: (short explanation) “It’s just a regular checkup.”

(accept blame) “I’m sorry if I forgot to tell you.”

“I didn’t write this check for $500. Someone at the bank is forging my signature.”

Don’t: (argue) “What? Don’t be silly! The bank wouldn’t be forging your signature.”

DO: (respond to feelings) “That’s a scary thought.”

(reassure) “I’ll make sure they don’t do that.”

(distract) “Would you help me fold the towels?”

“Nobody’s going to make decisions for me. You can go now…and don’t come back!”

Don’t: (confront) “I’m not going anywhere and you can’t remember enough to make your own decisions.”

DO: (accept blame or respond to feelings) “I’m sorry this is a tough time.”

(reassure) “I love you and we’re going to get through this together.”

(distract) “You know what? Don has a new job. He’s really excited about it.”

“Joe hasn’t called for a long time. I hope he’s okay.”

Don’t: (remind) “Joe called yesterday and you talked with him for 15 minutes.”

DO: (reassure) “You really like talking with him don’t you?”

(distract) “Let’s call him when we get back from our walk.”

“Hello, Mary. I see you’ve brought a friend with you.”

Don’t: (question memory) “Hi Mom. You remember Eric, don’t you? What did you do today?”

DO: (short explanation) “Hi Mom. You look wonderful! This is Eric. We work together.”

“Who are you? Where’s my husband?”

Don’t: (take it personally) “What do you mean – who’s your husband?” I am!”

DO: (go with the flow, reassure) “He’ll be here for dinner.”

(distract) “How about some milk and cookies?… Would you like chocolate chip or oatmeal?”

“I’m going to the store for a newspaper.”

Don’t: (repeat differently) “Please put your shoes on.”…You’ll need to put your shoes on.”

DO: (repeat exactly) “Please put your shoes on.”… “Please put your shoes on.”

“I don’t want to eat this! I hate chicken.”

Don’t: (respond negatively) “You just told me you wanted chicken. I’m not making you anything else, so you better eat it!”

Do: (accept blame) “I’m so sorry, I forgot. I was in such a rush that it slipped my mind.

(respond positively) Let me see what else we have available.” Leave the room and try again.

Need support? We’re here to help! Speak with one of our dementia experts by calling 858.492.4400 or emailing info@alzsd.org."

[shiningwonderland]

Syo Kurusu (Repeat)

Translator: Terry (Twitter: turtlemudge)

Proofreader: Raz (Twitter: agnadance)

November — Se Bisogna

The holiday after the school festival has ended, and regular classes have begun again. 

After school, everyone's very busy preparing for the graduation audition. 

Syo-kun and I are preparing too. We decided to come to the recording studio to practice our song. 

Haruka Nanami: Is Kaoru-kun still staying in your dorm room? 

Syo Kurusu: Yeah. I keep telling to go home, but he won't listen. 

Syo-kun's younger twin brother, Kaoru-kun, really wants Syo-kun to move back home.

He refuses to leave without him. True to his word,  he's stayed in the dorms ever since the school festival. 

Haruka Nanami: He's not even going to school, then? 

Syo Kurusu: That's right. … He's pretty bright, though. Did you know that Saotome Academy has a sister school? 

Haruka Nanami: Uh… yeah. It's, um, a really elite prep school, right? With experts in a lot of different fields? 

Syo Kurusu: Yeah, he's… well, he's enrolled in their medical course. It's a nine year course.

Syo Kurusu: He originally meant to apply here with me, but he had a fever on the day of the audition, and he wasn't able to come. 

Syo Kurusu: Then, he took the test there as a fallback option, and he managed to pass… He said that if he couldn't become an idol with me, then he wanted to be a doctor. 

Syo Kurusu: He's made that choice, so he should stick with it. I don't get what he thinks he's doing… Geez, he's such a worrywart…

Haruka Nanami: Aren't your parents worried…? 

Syo Kurusu: Well, yeah, probably, but they basically let us do what we want. They taught us to be responsible for ourselves and our choices. 

Syo Kurusu: They'd get super mad if we caused trouble for other people, but other than that they gave us free rein. 

Haruka Nanami: Come to think of it, I've never asked about your parents. What do they do? 

Syo Kurusu: Oh, have I not told you yet? My mom's an orchestra conductor. She's always going overseas for concerts and the like.

Syo Kurusu: It was because of her that I started learning the violin. 

Syo Kurusu: My father does hair styling and makeup for Shining Agency. He seems to get along pretty well with Shining. 

Syo Kurusu: Oh, but I'm not here because of favoritism. I got into Shining Academy on my own merit, not by taking advantage of connections or anything like that! 

Haruka Nanami: Yeah, I know that. You're singing is… really cool, after all. 

Syo Kurusu: … just my singing...? 

Haruka Nanami: No, not just that. I think everything about you is cool, Syo-kun. 

Syo Kurusu: Everything? … Come on, that's a bit of an exaggeration even for you…

Haruka Nanami: No, it's not! You're kind and cool and…

Syo Kurusu: A-anyway! We go to sister schools, and my father's an acquaintance of Shining. 

Syo Kurusu: But my dad doesn't seem worried about the situation, so… Actually, I wonder if Kaoru sweet-talked him into being okay with it. 

Syo Kurusu: He's usually a crybaby and a total pushover, but he gets stubborn over the weirdest things… and I can't say I agree with his methods, either. 

Syo Kurusu: He has serious tunnel vision. It's a pain in the ass.

Select the Phrase!

心配なんだね He's worried about you, right?  (+10 Love, +5 Music)

Syo Kurusu: Yeah, that might be what's going on. But even if it is, he's overdoing it. 

Haruka Nanami: You know… I think I may understand how Kaoru-kun feels. 

Syo Kurusu: What, are you taking his side now? 

Haruka Nanami: … I mean, you do push yourself too far sometimes. 

Syo Kurusu: Are you saying it's a bad thing to work hard? 

Haruka Nanami: No, not exactly… It just feels like if I take my eyes off you for too long, you might just keep going till you collapse. 

Syo Kurusu: It's a man's job to go beyond his limits! When should I be trying my best, if not now?

Haruka Nanami: … You have a point, but… But, I want you to take breaks sometimes, too. I want you to lean on me when you need to. 

Haruka Nanami: I know I may not be of much use to you, but I'd still like you to be able to count on me. Even if all you need is someone to vent to every once in a while. Okay? 

Syo Kurusu: Don't be ridiculous. You want me to come whining to you? What kind of man would do a thing like that?! 

Haruka Nanami: … Am I really… that useless to you…? 

Syo Kurusu: Ahh, come on!! Don't look at me like that! I already rely on you plenty, okay? 

Haruka Nanami: Huh…? 

Syo Kurusu: I can't sing without you, after all. I mean, you also make my songs...

Syo-kun grips my shoulder firmly, looking me straight in the eye. 

Syo Kurusu: Because you're here… I can go full speed ahead, knowing you'll stop me if I take things too far. 

Syo Kurusu: This way, I can focus on fighting my hardest. I can sing my heart out, knowing that I can trust you to have my back. 

Haruka Nanami: Syo-kun…

Syo Kurusu: … So please, don't look at me like that…

The hand that had been gripping my shoulder moves to my back, running gently through my hair...

And then Syo-kun pats me gently on the back. Once, twice. 

Almost like he's comforting a small child. 

Syo Kurusu: … I'm going to be fine…

While I'm letting myself be comforted by Syo-kun's words, I suddenly realize how little distance is left between us. Before I know it, my face is turning red. 

Syo Kurusu: Sorry… I just… uh… When Kaoru was little, I… I used to do that when he was about to start crying, and it usually cheered him up… so…

Oh, so he's trying to cheer me up because I looked worried. 

Haruka Nanami: I understand. Thank you.

大好きなんだね It's because he loves you, right? (+5 Love, +5 Music)

Haruka Nanami: You're his big brother, after all. 

Syo Kurusu: Yeah, I should be happy about that, I know... I mean, I love him too, he is my twin and everything. 

Still, it's time for him to start learning to stand on his own. We can't be together forever. 

Syo-kun gazes at the microphone with conviction. 

Syo Kurusu: You have to be able to chase your dream on your own, after all. 

Haruka Nanami: You're not alone, Syo-kun. 

I grip the hem of Syo-kun's uniform tightly. 

Syo Kurusu: Hm? 

Syo-kun turns, looking straight at me. 

Haruka Nanami: I'm right here. I'm you're partner, so I'll always be with you. 

I… don't want Syo-kun to talk like he's all alone. 

Syo Kurusu: Oh, yeah. You're right. Thanks, Haruka!! 

Syo-kun pats me on the head. 

Even if all I can do is make things a tiny bit easier for him… 

… I want to stay by his side and support him, no matter what. 

I want us to keep working together. Forever, come what may….=

お兄ちゃん子なんだね Has he always been a bit of a tag-along? (+0 Love, +5 Music) 

Syo Kurusu: Kinda. Well, either way, I wish he'd give me a bit more breathing room. 

Haruka Nanami: But if he did, wouldn't you feel a bit lonely…? 

Syo Kurusu: Not really. I have you now, after all. 

Haruka Nanami: … Syo-kun… 

Syo Kurusu: Just kidding… I mean, it's not just you, I've got loads of friends here… But I'm most comfortable around you, I guess…

Anyway! We're supposed to be practicing, right? So let's practice!

I used to think that Kaoru-kun would return home after two or three days, but…

… even a week later, he's still there, and it doesn't seem like he plans to leave anytime soon. 

Kaoru Kurusu: Ah! Welcome back, Syo-chan~. I've been waiting~. I'm so hungry…

Syo Kurusu: Kaoru… seriously… You can't keep doing this. 

Syo Kurusu: The term's already started. Don't come crying to me if you can't catch up with the curriculum!! 

Kaoru Kurusu: It's fine. I'm plenty clever!! Besides, I've stayed in touch with the teachers and everything! They know I'm in the dorms here…

Kaoru Kurusu: I told them my brother had a medical emergency and I'm staying with him for a little while. They were very understanding. 

Syo Kurusu: It still counts as you missing class though, right? 

Kaoru Kurusu: As long as I turn in make-up reports, it'll be fine. My school doesn't really care what I do, as long as I keep my test grades up. 

Syo Kurusu: Ugh, it figures that Saotome Academy's sister school would be like that… There's limits to letting students slack off…

Syo Kurusu: Seriously though, you can't study properly here, can you? Go home! 

Kaoru Kurusu: Look… I'm worried about you, Syo-chan. I'm sure that the second I leave, you'll go back to overworking yourself. 

Syo Kurusu: That was just bad timing! I'm not going to do that again. I promise. 

Kaoru Kurusu: But… that was just for the school festival. You're only going to practice harder from now on, right? 

Syo Kurusu: Are you saying you can't trust me?

Kaoru Kurusu: I mean… your version of "fine" is pretty messed up. 

Kaoru Kurusu: If I don't stop you, who will? I'm the only one who does. 

Syo Kurusu: I can't believe you… what do I have to do to convince you to leave? … Are you just gonna drop everything every time I collapse or whatever? 

Kaoru Kurusu: I'm not "dropping" anything…

Syo Kurusu: Look, at the very least, this is going to have a bad effect on your life if you keep it up. … I'm the one who's worried about you. 

Kaoru Kurusu: … Then… if it isn't me, who's going to take my place…? 

Syo Kurusu: Your place? 

Kaoru Kurusu: Yeah. For instance, if you were to get a girlfriend, and she promised to look after you, I'd be okay with going home…

Kaoru-kun returns Syo-kun's glare with a challenging expression, as if he wants to say, "I'd like to see you try." 

Syo Kurusu: A girlfriend…

Select the Phrase!

うちは恋愛禁…… That's not allowed here… (+0 Love, +5 Music)

Syo Kurusu: Aaaaaahh!!

Syo-kun panics and covers my mouth with his hand. 

Then he lowers his voice.

Syo Kurusu: Don't be stupid! If we tell him that, then he'll know I couldn't get a girlfriend even if I wanted to…

He whispers desperately into my ear.

Haruka Nanami: Ah… I see…

Kaoru Kurusu: … Is something wrong? 

Syo Kurusu: Uh, oh, nothing. So… a girlfriend, huh? If I have a girlfriend you'll get off my back?

Kaoru Kurusu: If you really get a girlfriend, then yeah. 

Come to think of it, I've never asked… Syo-kun is handsome and charming, so maybe… he does have a girlfriend… 

Girls and boys at this school aren't allowed to date each other, so I don't think he's dating anyone here, but maybe he's had a girlfriend since middle school, or something like that…

But if that were the case, then Kaoru-kun would probably know her… I wonder...?

彼女……？A girlfriend…? (+10 Love, +0 Music) 

Kaoru Kurusu: Yeah. Someone that cares about Syo-kun as much as I do, or even more than me. If he has someone by his side who'll protect him, that's good enough for me. 

Syo Kurusu: Hm… a girlfriend, huh…?

彼女でないとダメですか？Does it have to be a girlfriend?  (+5 Love, +0 Music)

Kaoru Kurusu: What do you mean? 

Haruka Nanami: There are a lot of people who care about Syo-kun and worry a lot about him…

Haruka Nanami: I would think you've realized this already by living here, but Shinomiya-san cares about Syo-kun a great deal. 

Kaoru Kurusu: I mean, I did kind of get that idea, but that guy seems pretty delicate, too… I'm pretty sure Syo-kun's stronger than he is. 

Syo Kurusu: I mean, with his glasses on, maybe… 

Kaoru Kurusu: Glasses…? 

Syo Kurusu: Oh, uh, nothing. Anyway, if I get a girlfriend, that'll satisfy you, is that right? 

Kaoru Kurusu: Yeah. But it has to be a real girlfriend. A friend doesn't count.

The next day, when Syo-kun and I go to school, we ask Ichinose-san and Jinguji-san for advice on what to do about Kaoru-kun. 

Syo Kurusu: … So, basically, he doesn't want to go home. At all. 

Syo Kurusu: But I don't have a girlfriend. Or anyone I could make my girlfriend, for that matter. 

Tokiya Ichinose: It's taboo for an idol to have a lover in the first place. And besides, getting one is not the sort of thing you can just pull off on a whim. 

Ren Jinguji: … That's not exactly true. All you need is passion and good timing. But regardless, you don't actually need a real girlfriend for this anyway… or am I wrong? 

Tokiya Ichinose: Ren… what exactly are you getting at? 

Ren Jinguji: It's quite simple, really. All he needs to do is convince his brother that he has a girlfriend, right? In that case, the Lady can pretend she's Shorty's lover. 

Syo Kurusu: Huh?! Whaaaat?!?

Haruka Nanami: Um, uhhh...?!? M-me, S-Syo-kun's…? 

I glance over to Syo-kun. He seems upset, and won't look in my direction. 

Ren Jinguji: Well, I'm not sure if Shorty's good enough boyfriend material to suit the Lady...

Syo Kurusu: Watch it!! What are you implying?! 

Ren Jinguji: You're about ten centimeters off from a good balance between you two, or am I wrong?  

Tokiya Ichinose: Ren… It's asking a bit much to demand he change a physical trait. There's nothing to be done on that front. 

Syo Kurusu: Dammit!! Quit making fun of me…! A man can be more than meets the eye! It's the heart that's important. You hear me?! The heart!!

Select the Phrase!

は、はいっ！O-of course! (+5 Love, +0 Music) 

Syo Kurusu: You said it!! 

Ren Jinguji: Hmmm. Well, in that case, everything's fine. You two shouldn't have any problem pretending to be lovers, right?

見た目も少しは大��かと…… I think appearance is a little important, too... (+5 Love, +5 Music) 

Syo Kurusu: Really?! I guess that means short guys are no good, huh…? 

Haruka Nanami: Ah, um… that's not quite what I meant… More that, appearance can be part of a person's individuality. It can be part of what makes them attractive, or…

Haruka Nanami: Anyway, I figure that idols need to craft an appearance that their fans can come to love, if that makes sense?  

Haruka Nanami: B-but, Syo-kun, you're already… really handsome…

Haruka Nanami: You have a great fashion sense, and your eyes are really clear and bright, and you're just so great…

Syo Kurusu: Oh, I see… well, of course! I'm a future BIG IDOL, after all!! 

Ren Jinguji: Well then, that settles it. All you and the Lady have to do is pretend to be lovers.

今のままでもかっこいいです You're already handsome just the way you are. (+20 Love, +0 Music) 

Syo Kurusu: Huh?! Handsome—!?! ...I-I mean, yes. Of course I'm handsome. That much is obvious. 

Tokiya Ichinose: Actually, it seems as though you have profound doubts on that front, judging by your reaction. 

Ren Jinguji: He's used to being called "cute," but I bet he hasn't been called "handsome" all that often. 

Jinguji-san shrugs, smirking. 

Syo Kurusu: That's not true…

Syo-kun begins to sulk, pouting a little.

Tokiya Ichinose: I, at least, have never heard such a thing directed at him. 

As Ichinose-san speaks, Syo-kun gets more and more upset. 

Syo Kurusu: Argh…

Ren Jinguji: Well, how about it, Lady? 

Ren Jinguji: Wouldn't you be overjoyed to take a handsome man like Shorty as a lover? 

Haruka Nanami: Ah… uh… I mean… it'd be an honor. But… I don't think I'd really be a suitable choice? A cuter girl would be…

Syo Kurusu: Nah… you'd be fine. Or actually, I'd rather it be you. If it was some other girl, there'd be more risk of it getting out. 

Ren Jinguji: Well then, that's that. All the Lady and Shorty need to do is pretend to be lovers.

Tokiya Ichinose: … That's true. There's the rule against romance, but I don't think you need to make too big of a scene of things. As long as you only pretend in front of Kaoru-kun, it should be fine. 

Syo Kurusu: Ah… but, well… I don't really know the basics of how to act to seem like we're… like that? 

Ren Jinguji: Well, that's easy. Just do this… Lady… 

Jinguji-san wraps his arm around me, placing his hand on the small of my back and drawing me towards him. 

Um… w-what is he…? 

Jinguji-san puts a hand beneath my chin, forcing me to raise my face to his.

He gazes at me with passion in his eyes. 

Haruka Nanami: Y-yes? 

Ren Jinguji: I love you. 

Haruka Nanami: !!! U-um, um-um-um-um…

Ren Jinguji: Come now, Lady. Your line here is "I'm yours, Syo-kun." Then, all you need to do is let those pretty eyes drift closed. Okay, give it a go, Shorty. 

Syo Kurusu: H… How am I supposed to do something that embarrassing?!?!

Haruka Nanami: G-good point… 

Syo Kurusu: I—I have to take one step at a time… but anyway, things like that are best kept private, y'know...? 

Syo Kurusu: Like… when it's just the two of us…

Syo-kun looks at me with a pleading expression. I… I can't say I have any experience in such things, but it does seem like the sort of thing you shouldn't do in front of other people. 

Haruka Nanami: Ah… Um, w-well. It… doesn't seem like something you should do wherever, all the time… so…

Ren Jinguji: Really? I do it all the time. I don't hold back with someone who's dear to me.

Tokiya Ichinose: Please practice a little self-restraint before it can become a problem. If it does, it'll already be too late. 

Ren Jinguji: Aw, come on, it'll be fine. No one's gonna catch me. Who do you think you're talking to? 

Tokiya Ichinose: Sigh… I can't believe you… Regardless, Ren's behavior doesn't suit the two of you.

Syo-kun and I nod deeply, agreeing with Ichinose-san's advice. 

Tokiya Ichinose: You're both fairly late bloomers, after all. If you want to get over your embarrassment, you'll need to follow the proper procedures… Let's see…

Tokiya Ichinose: Holding each other's gaze first, then holding hands, then an arm around the shoulders, then full embrace. A kiss on the forehead, and then a kiss on the lips. And then….  Why are you looking at me like that? 

Syo Kurusu: No, it's just… how do I put this…? Listing it all out like that is somehow even more embarrassing…

Haruka Nanami: If we follow those steps, will our performance improve? 

Tokiya Ichinose: … I wonder. Perhaps not, but… Well, for now, how about you start by holding hands and looking into each other's eyes? 

Syo Kurusu: … Holding hands…? 

Haruka Nanami: And looking into…

I glance at Syo-kun, but… I get embarrassed the second our eyes meet. We both end up looking away. 

But if we want to convince Kaoru-kun, we'll have to try harder… 

Syo Kurusu: I'm… gonna take your hand… Ready? 

Haruka Nanami: Y-yes… 

Trying our best not to look at each other, we extend our hands. 

*Bump!*

The instant our fingers brush, I retract my hand in a flash. 

Syo Kurusu: Uh… okay… so that happened. I'm gonna try again…

Haruka Nanami: I'm so sorry. I'll do it right this time. 

Syo Kurusu: No, it's fine. It's not worth freaking out over…

I think holding hands wouldn't be so difficult to manage normally, but doing so intentionally makes it incredibly embarrassing. 

It's not as though Syo-kun has never held my hand before…

But being so aware of it… not to mention doing it in front of other people…

Ren Jinguji: … Are they seriously acting like this about just holding hands? 

Tokiya Ichinose: I'm unsure if it's their clumsiness or some other factor, but I'm starting to feel embarrassed just watching this. 

Syo Kurusu: Look… We can go at whatever pace is comfortable for you…

Haruka Nanami: … All right. 

After trying over and over, Syo-kun and I manage to get as far as holding hands. 

I'm a little nervous to be touching Syo-kun so directly, but he wraps his hand around mine gently, without exerting too much pressure. 

Then, after school, Kaoru-kun comes to watch us rehearse in the recording room. 

Syo Kurusu: … Haruka… Here goes nothing. 

Haruka Nanami: … Okay. 

Syo-kun grips my hand tightly. … He's so strong…

Even though he seemed so embarrassed up till now, in the moment of truth Syo-kun readily takes the lead. He… really is cool, and handsome. 

Syo Kurusu: K-Kaoru!! 

Kaoru Kurusu: What's up, Syo-chan? Why are you making that scary face? Aren't you going to practice? 

Syo Kurusu: I've kept quiet about this until now, but… We're dating!!!

Syo Kurusu: So you don't have to worry. Go home already. 

Kaoru Kurusu: Really!? You're really, truly dating? You're going out with her??? 

Haruka Nanami: Ah, well… I mean… 

Select the Phrase!

たぶん…… Probably… (+5 Music) 

Kaoru Kurusu: What? What does that mean? 

Syo Kurusu: "Probably"? Really? 

Haruka Nanami: Ah, s-sorry, that came out wrong. We're dating. Um… seriously…

As I start to get flustered, Syo-kun wraps a gentle arm around my shoulders. 

Syo Kurusu: … It's okay. Calm down, I'll handle this. 

He murmurs reassuringly to me, keeping his voice low. 

Syo-kun…

Syo Kurusu: She may not look it, but she's incredibly dedicated. I've put my trust in her. So even if you aren't around all the time, I'll be okay. 

Haruka Nanami: T-that's right!! P-please leave Syo-kun to me…

Kaoru Kurusu: Hmm… Somehow, I can't quite believe you.

は、はい 。 Y-yes, I am. (+10 Love, +5 Music) 

Haruka Nanami: Um… please t-trust me to look after Syo-kun. I'll be by his side always. I won't take my eyes off him for a moment!! 

Syo Kurusu: She… gets a little worked up sometimes. And she has made mistakes before, but… Overall, she's pretty great. 

Syo Kurusu: She's no good at lying, and she has a bad habit of taking on anything anybody asks…. But I've never so much as seen her get annoyed. 

Syo Kurusu: Besides… she writes amazing music. I'm sure that if I have her at my side, I can become a better performer than ever. 

Haruka Nanami: … Syo-kun…

Is that really what he thinks of me…? 

Haruka Nanami: Ah, um! I may not be the most reliable person in the world, but… I promise I'll look after Syo-kun properly! 

Syo Kurusu: "Look after"...? What am I, the class pet...? 

Haruka Nanami: Ah, no! That's not what I meant…

Syo Kurusu: Well, whatever. Anyway, she's my girlfriend. … Does that make you feel better? 

With his arm still wrapped around me, Syo-kun turns to Kaoru with a bright, satisfied smile.  

Kaoru Kurusu: You can't convince me that easily. There's something fishy about this. Are you really his girlfriend?

大好きです！I love it! (+20 Love, +5 Music)

Syo Kurusu: Silly. What's "it," here? What are you trying to say? 

Haruka Nanami: Ah, g-good point…

Syo Kurusu: Besides, I'd like you to let me say it first. 

Syo Kurusu: Kaoru!! I'm in love with this girl. 

Syo-kun wraps a gentle arm around my shoulders. 

Haruka Nanami: U-um… I-I'm… in love… with Syo-kun.

Haruka Nanami: It's the truth!! I really love him… So!! 

Kaoru Kurusu: I don't buy it. You said you were partners when we first met, right? When did you start dating? There's something fishy about all this.

Kaoru-kun looks us over suspiciously. 

M-maybe this was enough? Or maybe we've been caught.

Judging by the way his arm tightens around my shoulders... Syo-kun might be feeling nervous, too. 

Kaoru Kurusu: Anybody can just say something like that. … I want proof. 

Syo Kurusu: Proof? 

Kaoru Kurusu: Yeah. If you kiss her in front of me, I'll believe you. If you're dating, that should be easy enough, right? 

Syo Kurusu: …

Haruka Nanami: …

Suddenly being told to kiss… when we're not even dating in the first place… What should we…? 

Kaoru Kurusu: Can't, huh? Well, then… I don't believe you. 

Syo Kurusu: We can! … Of course we can, that's easy. 

Haruka Nanami: Eh…? 

S—Syo-kun, what are you…? 

Syo Kurusu: Haruka!! Ready…? 

Um… I…

It would be my first kiss… But, if it's Syo-kun…

Syo-kun embraces me tightly enough that he squeezes me a bit. 

Haruka Nanami: Ah…

Syo Kurusu: We'll… take it one step at a time…

Syo-kun murmurs this in my ear, speaking too quietly for Kaoru-kun to hear it. 

I relax, letting Syo-kun do what he wants. I'm sure he'll… 

Still embracing me, Syo-kun gently strokes my hair. 

Somehow, even though my heart is still racing, I feel myself starting to relax. 

The hand that had been gripping me tightly loosens, and Syo-kun watches me with a kind look in his eyes. 

This time, as he leans in towards me, my eyes slide shut on their own. 

*Kiss*

… Instead of kissing me on the lips, he kisses my forehead… 

… Oh, I understand. He's following Ichinose-san's sequence. 

Gazing at each other, holding hands, an arm around the shoulders, a full embrace, a forehead kiss, and then a kiss on the lips. And so...

Since he did the forehead kiss, next is...

I open my eyes, and this time, Syo-kun closes his. 

… A kiss on the lips…

Steeling myself, I close my eyes as well. 

Syo Kurusu: Mm…

Syo-kun stops just in front of my lips, at the last possible second, kissing the air. And yet, he's so close that our lips may have touched a little…

The thought makes my face go a brilliant red.

Syo Kurusu: There! That good enough for you? 

Pulling away in a flash, Syo-kun turns triumphantly to Kaoru-kun. 

Kaoru Kurusu: No way… I can't believe you kissed her in front of someone else…. Not to mention while attending a school that forbids romance…

Syo Kurusu: Eh…? You knew about…? 

Kaoru Kurusu: Yeah, I knew. I said it because I never thought you'd do it. You're so dedicated, Syo-chan. I never thought you'd break a school rule. 

Kaoru Kurusu: I thought you'd never get a girlfriend under those circumstances—that's why I said it. And yet…

Kaoru Kurusu: … Do you want to stay at this school that badly? Do you want to become an idol even if puts too much strain on your body? Even if it kills you?!

Syo Kurusu: Yeah. … It's... my dream.  

Syo-kun looks Kaoru-kun straight in the eye as he says this. 

Kaoru Kurusu: You've… made up your mind already, huh? … Sigh… There's no point in trying to argue with you. Nothing I can say will stop you now. 

Kaoru Kurusu: I get it. I'll go home. … But if you collapse again, I'm absolutely forcing you to come back with me. 

Syo Kurusu: I won't. I won't let it happen again. 

And so, Kaoru-kun goes home. 

Syo Kurusu: Waaaaaahh. T-that was so embarrassing… I can't even. I'm gonna die of embarrassment. 

Syo-kun crouches down, clutching his head in his hands. 

Haruka Nanami: Um, a-are you okay? Does something hurt? 

Syo Kurusu: Of course not!! I'm never doing that again! I can't believe I did that in public!

Syo Kurusu: … Speaking of which… I'm really sorry. That… kinda came outta nowhere…

Haruka Nanami: N-no… I did wonder what you were going to do when Kaoru-kun told you to kiss me, but…

Haruka Nanami: But you rose to the occasion, Syo-kun. It's just, I got so nervous… I thought you were about to kiss me for real. 

Syo Kurusu: Don't be silly. I'd never be able to kiss you in a situation like that. … I haven't even confessed to you yet or anything…

Syo Kurusu: Ah… Dangit…

Haruka Nanami: Huh??? 

Syo Kurusu: You really don't notice much, do you. But, well, I don't hate that about you…

Syo-kun reaches out and brushes my bangs out of my face, examining me with a serious expression. 

Syo Kurusu: I'll… tell you properly someday. How I feel about you…

Syo-kun mutters something under his breath, but his voice is so quiet that I can't quite make out what it is he's saying.

Haruka Nanami: Syo-kun…?  

The next moment…

The principal suddenly appears out of an ornamental plant in the corner of the recording room. 

Shining Saotome: It's a good thing you stopped there. If you really became lovers, I'd have you expelled. 

Syo Kurusu: Waaaugh!!

Haruka Nanami: P-Principal…

Just how long has he been watching us...? 

Syo-kun and I exchange a startled glance. And then, when we glance back to the spot where the principal appeared…

… He's already vanished. 

Syo Kurusu: … What the heck was that? 

Haruka Nanami: How much do you think he saw? 

Syo Kurusu: Who knows…? Still, that was close… If I'd kissed you for real, we might've both been expelled…

Select the Phrase!

そうですね Yeah, true. (+5 Music) 

Syo Kurusu: Does this mean he might be watching us anytime, anywhere…? 

The principal, it seems, is no ordinary man.

でも…… But... (+20 Love, +5 Music) 

Haruka Nanami: It's not as though we were doing anything inappropriate, so I think if we'd explained the situation, he would have understood. 

Haruka Nanami: So I'm sure it would have been fine!! 

When I say this, brimming with confidence, Syo-kun gives me a pained smile. 

Huh? Did I say something weird?

……うん … Yeah. (+10 Love, +5 Music) 

Haruka Nanami: But… I suppose that kiss was… you know… Kind of like something in a play…? 

Haruka Nanami: There was a reason for it… I thought it'd be fine to… Uhm, that is, I mean…

Haruka Nanami: If there's ever a problem like this again, please let me know. If there's something I can do to help, no matter what it is, I'll do it. 

When Syo-kun hears me say this, he chuckles. 

Syo Kurusu: Thanks. If it does, I'll let you know. I'm counting on you. 

He pats my shoulder.

Regardless, it seems that Kaoru-kun has accepted the situation for now. 

I may not be Syo-kun's girlfriend, but I care for him a great deal. 

When I spoke to Kaoru-kun, I wasn't lying. I'll stay by Syo-kun's side and support him, always. 

I am his partner, after all. 

And yet… something about remembering the moment when I thought he was about to kiss me makes my face burn and my heart race…

I wonder if that effect will have worn off by tomorrow. 

MINI-GAME

Ryuya Hyuga: It's been a while since we had one, so it's time for a pop quiz! Textbooks closed, everyone!

Ryuya Hyuga: If your grade's too low, you're getting a week of make-up lessons!! Try your best to get a perfect score!! 

Ryuya Hyuga: The format's the same as before, but you've studied a lot so should know a lot more by now! The questions will be more difficult this time. Brace yourselves! 

Ryuya Hyuga: Choose the answer you think is best from the options provided! All right, time to get started. Begin! 

S-RANK

Syo Kurusu: Whoa… you really know your stuff, huh. Even I don't know if I could—uh, wait, no, of course I know all that stuff… o-obviously. 

Haruka Nanami: … Syo-kun, you didn't get a bad grade on the test, did you? 

When I thoughtlessly ask this question, Syo-kun turns bright red and looks away. 

I'm afraid I hurt his feelings. … What should I do…? 

Haruka Nanami: Um… would it be okay if we studied together next time? 

And so, I get to see Syo-kun smiling again while we study together. 

… I'm glad I was able to smooth things over with him. 

Chapter End

[catladyoftheyr]

Summer Vacation chapter 1/??

You kissed me in a way that’s gonna screw me up forever

Characters: Bella x Edward

Summary: Bella’s grounded after the events of the first book so Edward’s been sneaking into her room at night to spend time together. They end up kissing and things get a little steamy.

Word count: 839

A/N: my favorite parts of twilight are just Bella and Edward being cute together. I love them doing regular teenage things and I wish Stephanie Myer had given us content of them just being teenagers over the summer. This series is just me writing my ideal summer romance bc I have twilight brainrot. Edward might be slightly out of character idk and idc. This is my MY version of him 🫡

Edward and I had only been dating for a couple months officially. So much has happened since I moved to Forks in January that it’s felt like ages. It hasn’t even been a month since what Charlie had started calling The Incident when I stormed out of the house and told Charlie I couldn’t be trapped here like my mom. I still felt guilty for intentionally hurting his feelings, especially since I couldn’t tell him the truth. “Hey dad, my boyfriend and his entire family are vampires and another vampire tried to kill me in the ballet studio I went to as a kid.” Would probably make Charlie institutionalize me.

I heard my window softly slide open and Edward materialized in my bedroom. This had become a habit since I was still technically grounded. Charlie had tried to convince me to stop seeing Edward, and when that failed he’d declared that I was grounded until further notice. “Hi,” I whispered, unsure if Charlie was asleep yet. “You can pick the movie tonight.” I’d been saving my wages from my part-time job and managed to buy a small TV and DVD player from a local thrift shop. Edward rummaged carefully through the small stack of DVDs and held up a copy of Pride and Prejudice before sliding the disc in. We sat next to each other in my bed and Edward planted a light kiss on the top of my head.

“You smell like coconut,” he murmured.

“New shampoo”

“How long does Charlie plan on keeping you locked up in the house for?”

“Probably forever at this rate. I keep trying to convince him that I've learned my lesson but I feel like he’s not budging. He thinks you’re a bad influence.” I can't say I entirely blamed Charlie. He was doing his best to parent me on his own and I wasn’t making it very easy lately. Still, I wish he’d ease up a little. I leaned my head against Edward’s shoulder, wanting to feel the coolness of his skin. His eyes were focused on the screen but my gut told me he wasn’t paying attention. I wished I could know what he was thinking about, and I know he wished the same of me.

I traced the veins in his hands with my fingers. Edward stiffed and I looked up at him for the signal to continue. He nodded and my fingers continued to tread lightly up his arms. Physical intimacy was still largely uncharted territory in our relationship. I wanted so desperately to allow us to be less restrained with how we touched each other but we both knew the risks. I knelt and turned to face him on the bed and cupped his jaw gently in my hands. Edward was if a marble statue of a Greek God had come to life. He was classically beautiful and his features were stern but gentle underneath. I closed the gap between us and let our lips connect.

His lips were cold at first but quickly warmed with mine on them. Edward didn’t technically need to breathe but I felt cool air hit my face as we kissed. I felt Edward’s hands grip my hair and pull me closer. We broke apart so I could breathe and I locked my eyes in his. His eyes darkened with passion and he let his hands fall from my hair. “Do you want to keep going?” He asked. I nodded fervently and slid his hands down to my hips. Edward lifted me onto his lap and I locked my legs behind him. I was tired of being careful and controlled. I needed to touch him. Our lips met again and I moaned softly. I gripped my hands into his hair and tried to leverage myself even closer. His hands dug into my hips firmly. Even in passion he was in control of himself; he could snap me in half if he wasn’t cautious but I didn’t care anymore.

Edward pulled back to look at me. “You’re so beautiful, Bella” he whispered in the dark before his lips moved to my neck. I gasped and wrapped my arms around him tighter, digging my nails into his shoulders. He sucked lightly, surely intending to leave a mark. He’d told me that vampires marked their mates but this was new behavior for Edward. I whispered as he made his way to my collarbones, planting light kisses all the way down. “I love you” he said softly.

“I love you too. Keep going please” I said breathlessly. Just as Edward was about to oblige my request there were footsteps in the hallway. We both froze and I silently prayed for Charlie to go back to bed. The only sound in the dark room was my breathing and the television. Charlie knocked lightly on my door and I swore under my breath. “Yeah?” I called out.

“Can you turn the volume down please? I have to be up early tomorrow. Goodnight, Bells.”

“Okay I will. Goodnight, Dad.”

[neonstatic]

i woke up from a strange dream today.

tw: death, animal death, blood, weird dream shit

in the dream, i discovered "vermin" in the apartment. the first was a snake i killed by snapping its neck w tongs, and i placed it in a laundry bin to gather blood while i found a cleaner way to dispose of it. i was in a hurry bc my mom had just told me that we had family coming. in my search for a trash bag, i found some sort of gerbil in a pantry (?) and i killed it too. but since this kill was less messy, i shoved the dead gerbil in a corner and continued on my search for a trash bag.

since i was taking too much time to prepare for the guests and my mom and sister were getting on my case, i revealed to them that i'd found vermins and i needed help getting rid of the bodies. corpses, i call them. to which my mom argued that i can't tell that they're corpses if i've never seen them alive. and that left me frozen for a bit cus like, i most definitely saw them alive. (and that gave me a sudden flashback to previous dreams i've had this week that i'd forgotten til now: i'd be home on a regular day off and see bodies around me and my mom would keep arguing w me that not every limp body i see is dead or a corpse.) i snapped out of it w my sister saying that i certainly knew what i was talking about and to stop questioning my knowledge.

neither decided to help me tho. which pissed me off bc i killed the creatures for them? cus otherwise they'd freak out and i'm the only one qualified for the job in this household. i'm the protector. even tho i was scared i did it anyway and they dared to act like the killing was nothing for me? anyway, i got over the anger and went looking again for a bag when i saw in my bedroom that someone was there. it was a cousin i haven't seen in yrs and he looked just like that one picture of him we have in the living room, where he looks young and clean and dapper in a suit, but this time he was facing away from me, and wouldn't turn around no matter how long i stared at his back.

so i went back out of the bedroom and told my sister abt what i saw, to check if i was hallucinating or not. she told me he'd been there for a while, wtv that means. i didn't respond and instead went to dispose of the snake bc i could see in my mind's eye that the blood pool was growing. i put it in a small bag i found but had trouble tying it up, and got blood on my fingers but wasn't as grossed out as i thought i should. then when i stood up to take care of the gerbil, i heard the guests being let in at the front door and i woke up.

-

so i guess my question is: wtf. what the fuck??? what???? tu peux pas dire que c'est un cadavre si tu l'as jamais vu en vie? quoi? huh???

[emiel-surreal]

i work in food service so i meet and serve a lot of people with greatly varying access needs and preferences. i have many stories of where i suspected people were expecting or anticipating me to be rude or incapable of or unwilling to help them. which sucks!!!! everybody deserves to be able to go to a restaurant and have a meal cooked for them as they want it.

we have a few regulars with allergies. of course we’ll make your meal without dairy. of course you can have corn tortillas instead of flour. this is the bare minimum in my opinion. we have the alternatives already so it isn’t an imposition at all. i feel horrible when it’s a busy day, and only the meal with a list of modifications was made wrong (the kitchen is rushed, they don’t see all the mods) so now only the person with allergies feels singled out, waiting an extra 15 minutes for their food to arrive RIGHT. this mostly happens on busy days, i only remember it happening two or three times. i think we’ve gotten better at reminding the kitchen and holding them accountable.

i held the kid’s meal out toward the one kid at the table, but she pushed the plate away. i looked to the mom with a surprised look. i was about to ask, “is there something wrong/missing?” but the mom said “she’s autistic”. i just said “i understand!” and i let the mom take the food from me. i guess she gets backlash from other adults in public when her kid doesn’t “behave”? i can’t remember if i did clarify/ask again “does everything look okay” or if she said everything is okay and i left. i know that in general, on a few occasions, my coworkers talk about how some kids are misbehaving, and i smile and nod while i think “they’re kids, they’re hungry, only we have the power to pacify them but instead we’re gossiping”.

i delivered two kids meals, but ranch spilled into one plate from its ramekin, contaminating the chicken strips. the mom at the table told me it had to be remade. i said of course, no worries. i swapped the ranch-contaminated chicken with some from another meal that wasn’t ready yet (it was just a couple drops of ranch, of course i’m using gloves). my coworker made like this kid was so unreasonably picky, but dude i get it. food needs to be RIGHT, and risking that this kid might have ARFID, why would i be the one to prevent this kid from eating? unfortunately the other kid meal was more difficult to reconcile but that one was out of my hands.

this lady couldn’t remember the name of the sauce she wanted on her sandwich. i couldn’t figure it out either, asking her for the flavor profile. so i brought a few out for her to try (i have to ask the kitchen to give me a ramekin of each). turns out we actually discontinued the sauce she was remembering lol whoops!!

a lady tells me her broccoli is too hard, and she can’t eat it because she has no teeth. yeah sometimes the broccoli doesn’t steam all the way. i took it back and steamed it further. i hate that someone could order something and then it turns out they won’t be able to enjoy it how they looked forward to it.

i get that this isn’t most people’s dream job, and it doesn’t pay very well. but we work with food, which people ingest, and i think that’s very serious. our pay is also directly correlated to how well we do our jobs and how many customers come back, so yeah i expect that i and my coworkers at least pretend to care about building a decent experience for customers. i know there’s a lot of talk about doing the minimum amount of work to stick it to the man or whatever, but also… besides the fact that my pay is correlated to how well i work (how likely to return customers are after being served by me)… i am working for people, why would i want to be rude? the rudeness affects the customer, not the boss.

and i am not perfect by any means. sometimes i go in to work exhausted or stressed already, or the job gets me exhausted or stressed, and i know i’m not being bubbly and polite and perfect. it’s hard when i have to keep up with the rest of the kitchen and restaurant, and help one person remember the name of what they’re asking me for. but that is the job and i take it seriously even if it’s hard for me at that moment.

very controversial opinion here, but sometimes customer service workers are the problem 😶

[castle-dominion]

c3x23 pretty dead

This is a nostalgia song for me but it was released in 2011 so it was modern at the time. Wow. W o w...

I only rly know anything abt anything bc of the movie dumpling when some fat girl & some punk feminist joined a beauty contest. This man looks like a pimp. Kind of is Nice yellow cumberbund thing Illinois? Being french is weird. I want to say illinwa but everyone else says illanoy She;s wearing interesting clothing. Wow short with your daddy. I mean we all need to get away from home! Hey! I love the emotional b plot, it's so good to see rick as a dad who loves his daughter & supports her instead of acting like the twelve year old who can score his teacher. Odds are, someone's dead.

It's not the baron is it? Beckett outfit update: Detective clothes. Double breasted trench coat looking thing tied with a fabric belt. Her shirt is sort of crazyquilted in blocks it has colours, more pink around the waist. It is a regular collared buttonup shirt. I think I've seen her in it before too, which is nice bc I like seeing continuity. Ryan outfit update: Green sweater, dress shirt, brown normal looking coat (still professional enough), I can't tell the pants or tie bc the lighting is weird. Update: it's a light purple-tinted shirt. He's aken off his jacket in the precinct & I can see it now. The shirt has really nice collars & it's actually stripy but so light u can hardly see it. Tie is green & patterned slightly, it's like diamonds but it's also because the grain of the weave changes I think, so the way the light reflects off of it makes some of them more shadowed than others. PERLMUTTER YESSS SP: Detective. Writer.

I should call my dad. I don't talk to him enough. Glad he said he didn't actually know the time, just vaguely a little before 11; tho he could have also checked. Baron called them both detectives lol I mean yeah fair to the victim first but at the same time she's dead she won't feel it. Yeah lol I love how they're filming BTS & it might actually be a good idea to keep em on Come again! Oh no wait we don't want that. She's so silly I love her.

In the elevator scene the button for floor 4 is lit. (for floor four lol.) Homicide is on the 4th floor.

Beckett was indeed a model but not a beauty queen.

I like the one cop getting a picture with a queen oh goodness this is insane. A bunch of gals who look exactly the same all milling about this stinky bullpen & entire precinct wow & that "winners never slouch" got my mom & me to straighten our posture & celebrate the fact that she wasn't one of those moms who gave her kids eating disorders KB, whispering: CASTLE. THEY'RE EVERYWHERE. JE: Beats the usual lowlifes & nutjobs  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) KB: I don't know if u can say that nut jobs and beauty queens are mutually exclusive JE: Yeah, but none of them connect to the murder. I checked the sequin against all their dresses RC: I bet you did. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) JE: & none of them are a match. KB: Okay, look at the footage from the dinner. Let's make sure that the dresses we checked are the ones they actually wore. JE: Hm. Watch a parade of beautiful women in evening attire? Yeah, I can do that. RC: I bet you can. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) KR: Hey. So, I've been interviewing these ladies-- RC: I bet you have. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) KR: -! About their alibis last night!

clipping

Castle she's probably way too young for you

This man is gay af. I'm glad it's about more than beauty & who can buy the fanciest dress. I would honestly expect to be makeup skills, dance skills, & sewing skills more than who can afford what or even stuff like social issues. It's kind of neat how it's a talent show as well as a beauty contest. I like this guy. He seems so stressed over his gal dying. Political he says, making those motions with his hands

Black sequins? It's like the wedding video. I thought they were black sequins! I just couldn't tell if it was black bc it was so shiny.

KR: For unwanted *looks to esposito* advances Esposito ryan is telling u to stop hitting on him, he's getting married. /j btw KR, eyes wide with excitement: Oh but it gets better! *hits espt gently* JE: *barely raises an eyebrow* (he would bite castle's head off if it was him) KR: *excitedly continues to explain the drama*

Ew I hate this bobby character. Man sat on the wrong side of the table ...Goddess train...???.?.?? Who wouldn't want to ride the bobby rocket? Everyone from what we hear! Boy can't even remember?

KB: this guy's dropped more pills than a three fingered pharmacist I can't believe castle took dad advice from him Esposito just had video running on beckett's computer? (btw i figured out how to put question marks on tumblr wéo relying on copy-paste: I use my french keyboard!)

Esposito has an ass

Someone would probably pawn the fiddle, not drop it down a drain. Tho pawned can lead back to u. Captions? He said right on, not all right. KB just sits in the desk espt was just at

Oh martha is so pretty! Far right! Look at her abs! What was your talent? The way I wore a sweater. Oh poor Alexis. I love the drama. Give her a hug! I'm so glad alexis has gram there.

Ok castle, you have been divorced twice, idk if your relationship advice is that good

Parallel. It's love! Montgomery is so sweet I love him! RM: If you stayed married long enough, you'd know it's hard to stay original after the first ten. BRUH. (that was good!) JE: Yeah, he was tweeting photos of his manhood along the way. *holds up fingers close together* (won clip)

KR with a nice pastel blue sweater, plus his usual attire. I don't like that accent. KB has a nice jeanjacket with those leather sleeves. You would disrespect a beautiful & expensive instrument like that? 25 is old? Your brain has barely finished developing! Drugs?

Ah nudes.

lmao I love the sticky notes they put over them RC: Well, just because you're smart and beautiful doesn't mean you have good judgment. KB: RC: I didn't mean me.

RC: Deadly action, that's a good title JE: *looks down & shakes head in exasperation* Why would the photographer pay HER for the photos? She would be paying THEM for the session, right? Also dang she's skinny.

Boy's gay voice is so strong that my little bro thought a woman was speaking. & then I went all trans on him & explained voices. I don't even know as much as I would like to tbh. I should take singing lessons (not necessarily gender affirming voice lessons)

RM: Beckett, you're a woman, right? KB, lowkey flustered: Sir, I have no idea what to get your wife! [...] RC: The best thing to give a woman is something she said she wanted when she didn't think you were listening. RM: What if I wasn't listening? RC: Gift certificate? no honey no

JE: *turns around to watch someone's booty* "Negative" Yay she's sending ryan to meet up with him finally, keep the boys together

I like how he doesn't remember the actual name but does remember it was smth similar to jerry. Already "night before last"? Mum is always confused about how the doorone remembers everything. Sus? Sure. Lack of smth regular? Maybe. Smth normal? not rly.

Keieiper XD Every guy is a creep in the eyes of the parent. Poor becket,, look at her nearly pulling her hair out. KB: It was my own private Vietnam. Our place smelled of hairspray, perfume, and cigarettes. I'm surprised that we didn't spontaneously combust.

It's ash!!! He really does love her to go see her dad at work to win her back Long distance relationships are better than they used to be. It used to be that your man goes off to make a fortune so he can marry you but then gets attacked by pirates & becomes a pirate himself & then steals you back from kidnappers, or you go away for ten months & then come back & your wife has a kid altho I might be mixing up the birth of hercules/heracles with ulyssix/odysseus & his son who I thought might be nine years old when the man was gone for ten idk it's smth like that anyways it's better to have long distance relationships these days since back then you could send letters that take ages to get to that war zone or whatever.

Ryan's the one who said "yo" this time Ew an obsessive porn wall Ew he's hanged right behind it. they didn't smell it

Peri mortem. During death, not before, not after. Before amber? Yes Before! Now can you please move? You're in my light! (Perlmutter also has an actor who needs to know where to stand to get his light) (not clipping)

By today's standards are downright tasteful! Those convenient sticky notes Girl he's on the phone, you're asking him to do work while he's on the phone? Poor Jenny. "Sorry Babey."

RC: You know I-- I hate to interfere… AC: Since when? RC: Point taken.

Nice little magnifying glass! He got it bc beckett doesn't have one Coffee <3

Y'all agreed & knew he was a cheater? Wow this is dramatic. WOAH A VASE! Who do I need to be ashamed in front of? "take care of it"???

BOBBY STARK? Course he doesn't remember.

Strawberry oil XD ok rick

Why woulld he assume one of them was lying? Didn't they all say she was great?

He was so upset! No! (Ryan & espt had better be there) Ah yes they are. Where u going? Huh?

Good work you two! *clearing throats loudly* (Ryan's square shirt love it.) Good work you folks. Rick really is a charmer isn't he? I love it when characters are in love Dancing "That gift this morning"? sounds like sex Wait, you're serious, boss? Smile, please. That's an order. (They all smile and chuckle.) RM: Hey, you kids take care, alright? (He really is the dad of the precinct) KR: What the hell did you say to him? RC: Nothing! No, I just told him to listen to what his wife wanted. JE: Damn, Castle. KB: Castle, let me let you in on a little secret. Captain Montgomery retires all the time, just give it a week or two. He's like the Brett Favre of the NYPD. Trust me. He's not going anywhere. It's just so cute, I KNOW they are just teasing him & making him think they were mad at him> & then espt still makes that move at him lol. Making him run out of the room sideways.

She will keep showing up See you tomorrow SDFHAKSJDFHDSFD

She is such a lil genius just like my bb bro. I took an extra year of highschool lol.

So yeah good episode.

[myinternetaddictworld]

Kiss It Better {P.P}

MINORS DNI 18+

This one is kinda longer than my last posts so if you’re looking for a longer read here ya go. Smut toward the end for my favorite little freaks 🤭

CW: college! peter x reader, oral sex (f receiving) body worship, multiple orgasms, possessive peter if you squint

You were never one for relationships. You figured because you always moved around so much growing up, there wasn't much of a point to getting close to anyone. You figured it would just hurt less to keep to yourself. Since graduating high school, your mom moved once again, this time to New York City. This was the biggest city you had lived in yet. Money was so tight, that rather than starting university right away, you decided to work and help your mom out as long as possible. You referred to it as a "gap" year but really you weren't sure how long this little break was gonna last. All you knew was that you needed to find a job and you had to do it fast. Luckily you found one; a cashier at a small bodega near your apartment.

The owners were nice and although the money wasn't that much, they promised you more after your first three weeks. You liked the environment and the local customers were surprisingly sweet. Most of them were nice older people usually coming to pick up their morning newspaper and maybe a lotto ticket. Your favorite customer, however, was a tall, curly-headed brunette who looked around your age. He would always come in and grab the same four items: a bacon egg and cheese bagel, a bag of barbeque Lay's, an Arizona iced tea, and a bag of M&M's. He must've been a regular for a while because your manager knew him by name; Peter. The two of you both enjoyed small talk from time to time. You even started having little inside jokes that he would shyly bring up every chance he could get.

One day, you supposed he finally got the nerve up to ask you for your number because he seemed super nervous when he did. From that day on, you two became really close friends. His aunt May even loved you, often inviting you over for dinner. You would be lying if you said the two of you hadn’t “fooled around” a bit in the months you’ve been in New York. The first time it was your idea. You proposed it after a fun night out clubbing with the boy. With the small amount of alcohol in your system, you embarrassingly mentioned how attracted to him you were as well as the few wet dreams you had about him. Peter didn't oblige so you found your partially exposed back pressed against the cold interior of the bathroom stall. It was messy—very messy but you loved every bit of it. From that point on the two of you were classic friends with benefits. It's not like the two of you fucked every chance you got, but when the both of you were in the mood and available, you always took the opportunity.

"Hey sleepy head," he said walking into your empty store.

"Hey," you grumbled out, placing some juice cartons into one of the now empty refrigerators.

"Jesus, good morning to you too," he laughed.

"Sorry, just not having the best morning," you say tossing the plastic container that held the cartons in the trash.

"Sheesh, sorry. Do you wanna talk about it?"

"Don't you have work in like half an hour?" you say, looking at him.

"Please, work can wait...plus I wanna know what's wrong with my favorite person."

The comment made you smile.

"...I'll tell you later," you say. Peter frowns.

"Seriously, I'll meet you at your place when I get off," you said, looking at the cash register in front of you.

"Okay...but promise me you won't mope around all day or otherwise I will too,"

This comment makes you let out a small laugh.

"Alright, I promise Parker. Now go, before you miss your train again."

He smiles, before leaning over the counter and placing a small, chaste kiss on your forehead.

"Okay, okay I'm out the door." he says quickly grabbing his items and placing his money on the counter. With a small ding of the door alarm, Peter is gone.

You loved when Peter and you shared small domestic moments like that. Of course, he wasn't your boyfriend, but he was the closest thing you had ever had to one. When the two of you first started messing around, you were also the one who insisted on not putting a label on it; more just enjoying each other's company. He hesitantly agreed. Despite the "no label/ just friends" agreement, Peter was still one of the sweetest guys you had ever been with. Always opening doors for you, insisting on taking you to his favorite restaurants, and even buying you little gifts here and there.

The real reason you were so upset was that your mother broke the news to you that this would be your last week in New York. She had gotten laid off from her job and there was no way she could make next month's rent in time. Even with the money you were making, there was no way the two of you would be able to afford to stay. In any other case, you would be slightly disappointed but quickly get over it. In this case, you were angry. New York was the first place you felt you fit in and most of all you were nowhere near ready to lose Peter. The thought of you ate at you for the rest of your shift. You hadn’t even realized how fast time was passing. It was now 5 PM and time for you to leave. You let your manager know you were on the way out and gathered your things.

The city looked nice as you walked to Peter’s apartment. Once you arrived you knocked at the door that Peter quickly answered.

“Hey bug, May is working a little late tonight but I could order us pizza if you’re super hungry,” he said as you made your way into his apartment. He had just gotten out of the shower; you could tell because his hair was wet and his lower half dawned a bath towel.

“It’s okay, i’m not really hungry right now.” you say smiling.

“Come here,” he says walking over and pulling you into a hug. His damp hair brushed against you, making you laugh.

Despite this, you loved his hugs. You loved how he always smelled of vanilla. His hugs made you forget everything bad in the world.

“I missed you today,” he said while pulling away.

“I missed you too,” you say secretly missing his embrace.

“So how was work? Do you feel any better from this morning?” he says motioning you to follow him to the couch.

“Uhm, yeah a little,” you say awkwardly taking a seat next to him.

“You sure?”

You nod. He pats his lap urging you to lay on him. You oblige. He begins playing with your hair. You enjoy sitting in this comfortable silence with him.

“Can I have a kiss,” you say, shyly.

“Of course, Princess.”

You sit up and Peter pulls you on to his lap. He leans in and kisses you. Your stomach does cartwheels. You deepen the kiss as you wrap arms around his neck. He’s the first to break the heated kiss.

“Someone’s excited to be with me, huh?” he teases. You laugh.

“It’s okay, I’m a little excited too…” he says as he shifts beneath you. He’s hard, you can feel it through the towel.

“Wow Peter, it’s been like .2 seconds and you’re hard?”

“Hey, you’re the one sitting on my lap, how can I not get hard?” he says, leaning back. You

“Okay, okay.” you’re right, you giggle. You climb from atop of him and lay on the opposite end of the couch.

“Take me big boy,” you say jokingly. Peter crawls over you, leaning down to kiss you again. This kiss different from the first one. This one needy and desperate. It had been weeks since the two of you hooked up. You were busy with work and he was busy with school. Both of you could agree this was much needed.

The kiss soon moved from your lips to your cheeks and eventually to your neck. Peter knew your body better than anyone else you had ever been with. He quickly found the sweet spot of your neck which earned a quiet moan from you. He lightly tugged at the fabric of your shirt. You help him by grabbing the material and pulling it up before he finishes pulling it completely off. His head dips down to your chest, kissing each of your breasts and reaching back up to your lips.

"Mhm--there's just something about taking your work clothes off of you," he says, now hovering just above your face. You laugh and playfully roll your eyes.

Peter stares deeply into your eyes. His eyes fixated on your face makes you a little nervous.

Pete...is there something on my face?" you giggle

"What? No." he responds

"Then why are you staring so hard, dork," you say trying to get him to stop.

"You just looked really pretty then," he started.

"--Not that you don't look beautiful all of the time, it was just right there..." he trailed off.

"Wait," he said pushing himself off of you.

"Pete~~" you whine, seeing him walk out of view to presumably get something.

"Stay in that position," you hear him yell from his bedroom. He shortly returns with his prized film camera.

He holds the camera up and quickly takes a photo.

"Peter, I wasn't ready for that," you continue to whine.

"Yes, you were." he says walking toward you to show you the picture. The picture was actually beautiful. It was you, laying on Peter's couch with your back slightly arched. Your hair messily framed your face and the slight sunset lit one side of your face.

You blush as Peter continues to hold the camera in front of you. This must be how he sees me all the time? you think. The thought lingers in your head for a bit.

"So, you like the picture then? You keep blankly staring at it," he laughs.

"Yes, Peter. I love the picture," you smile.

"...and I love you," he says placing the camera down and looking at you.

Once you had fully processed what he had said, your brain went into panic mode. Peter just told you that for the first time. You sat there with wide eyes and your mouth agape.

"I know we agreed on no 'boyfriend or girlfriend lables' and no 'I love yous' but I felt like saying it and have for a while so I figured I say it. You don't have to say it back or even feel it but I just thought you should know..." he trailed off, turning his eyes to his feet.

You felt your eyes begin to well with tears.

"I'm sorry if I made it awkward, it's just I'm not so used to the whole 'friends with benefits' thing and I really like you. That's why I said you didn't have to say it back. We can keep whatever relationship--or non-relationship we have going on." he continued.

By this point, tears were pouring out of your eyes. Peter finally took the time to focus his attention from the floor back up to you.

"Oh my god, I didn't mean to make you cry. I'm so sorry--ugh please don't cry. Uh-- I didn't mean it!" he says, quickly leaning down to wipe the tears from your cheeks.

"You didn't mean it?!" you say, now almost sobbing.

"No I did mean it, I just don't want you to cry because I said it." he said, his voice wavering. His words felt rushed, apologetic.

"Peter, I'm not crying because you said it!" you say, sitting up and pushing him slightly away from you.

"You're not?" he says, immediately taking a seat right next to you.

Your hands came up to your face to catch the continually falling tears.

"No," you sniffle out.

"Do you secretly hate me?" he said.

"What?! Peter, of course not!" you say slightly raising your voice.

"Then why are you crying?" he says, moving your hands from your face and replacing them with his own.

"I'm leaving," you say, barely above a whisper.

"Huh? Like right now?" he says, his eyes widening.

"No, like New York." you say, avoiding eye contact.

Peter's lip twitches slightly.

"Funny joke." he says. You feel his eyes burning a hole into you.

"I'm not kidding. Mom's been laid off and rent is due in a week. She's already drawing up all the moving papers." you say, averting your eyes at his. Peter sits there in silence.

You continue to stare at him, trying to gauge his reaction.

"This is not how I saw this playing out," he said finally breaking the silence. Your glance softens as you see his lip began to slightly quiver.

"Maybe May and I could help, just for the next few months--"

"Peter, we both know I can't accept your money."

"Yes, you could! I want you to have it."

You shake your head.

"Please--" he whispered out.

The two of you sat there, in silence again.

"Guess what though?" you say reaching your hands up to the sides of his face.

"What?" he says disappointedly.

"...I love you too, Peter Benjamin Parker." Peter's lips bust into a small smile.

"You're gonna be really hard to forget, you know that?"

You lightly gasp.

"Well, I would hope you wouldn't forget me."

"Forgetting feels easier than missing you every day. You sigh. Your body can’t produce anymore tears but your eyes still burn.

“You don’t have to miss me just yet…I’m still here till next Friday… I mean we can still enjoy each other’s company till I leave,” you say, your voice inflecting a more of a question than a statement.

“Yeah, I know.” he says placing his hands over yours.

Peter cocks his eyebrow.

“Are you seriously still trying to fuck after this depressing ass news?”

You laugh, hard. The laugh almost made you forget the pain you were feeling prior.

“Would you kill me if I was?” you say.

“No, it would just leave me with a bunch of unanswered questions and trauma,” he joked.

“What?” you say, giggling.

“I just mean…” he hesitates. He clears his throat so his words come out more serious.

“If you weren’t leaving, would all this still be just fun between us? Like would we just go back to being ‘friends with benefits’?”

You sigh.

“Peter…I knew I would dread this day if it came.”

His kissed his teeth.

“So the answer would be Yes? Got it, in your world apparently ‘friends with benefits’ say I love you to each other.

“Stop, okay!” you begin.

“I never said anything. Peter, I really do love you. I’m in love with you. If I were staying, I’d be attached to you at the hip. Hell, you’d be begging me to leave you alone,” you say. The earns a small chuckle from the man.

“I would like that—or let me rephrase. Would’ve have liked that very much.” he says, pulling your hands away from his face and interlocking them with his.

“Me too.” you say staring at him fondly.

“Who says we can’t make long distance work?”

“Peter we don’t even know where we’re moving to yet—plus…long distance never works. You’re gonna be so busy with school and I’m probably gonna find another job. We’ll eventually grow apart and start resenting each other.”

“Not if you go into it with that attitude. I’m willing to do what it takes.” he says.

You think for a moment.

“I say we try it and if we hate, we call it off. Or I come and see you every break I have. It’s at least worth a shot, right?” he says, his eyes glistening with hope.

Peter has always been an optimist. This quality of his shined even on the darkest days.

“Okay.”

“Yeah? Okay?”

“Mhm.”

“Okay as in we’re doing this whole boyfriend-girlfriend situation?”

“Yes Peter!” you laugh.

“Really? Like for real? he says, confirming one more time.

“Oh my god, Peter you’re my boyfriend.” you say.

His eyes light up. He quickly grabs your face and peppers kisses on your lips and both your cheeks.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” he says, in between pecks.

“For what?” you say blushing.

“For…saying you’ll be mine.

He finishes with chaste kiss on your lips.

“Now that we’ve sealed the deal… don’t you think it’s only fair to commemorate this moment?” he says suggestively.

“Now who’s just trying to fuck?” you laugh.

“Hey, you were trying to do it way before we agreed you were my girlfriend,” he stated

“Touché…” you giggle.

“Now, if you’ll let me,” he says, pushing your back onto the couch. His lips joined with yours as he climbed on top of you. Your arms reached around his neck, to once again deepen the kiss. Peter’s hands began to wander your torso before finding their way up to your chest.

“Mhm— take this off baby…please,” he said reaching his hands underneath you to help unclasp your bra. He had gone through this motion so many times before that he could basically do it with one hand. He slowly pryed the piece of fabric off of you, revealing your bare chest.

“God, I will never get tired of seeing these,” he said dipping his head down and kissing the tops of each one. Your fingers found themselves in the back of his hair, tugging; urging him to go lower.

“I know, I know baby. I can smell how wet you are. Just let me appreciate you a little more. Show you, you’re mine.” he let out softly before finally placing his mouth around one of your now sensitive nipples. You gave an airy moan. Peter began alternating between kissing and sucking each one, gaging your reactions to each action. His hands continued wandering as he made his way to the zipper of your jeans. He slowly unzipped them and slid his hand in.

“God, baby your panties are soaked,” he groaned out.

“My pretty girl, you’re so good to me.” he said slightly menacingly.

He continued his work on your chest while slowly lightly rubbing his fingers up and down your clothed slit.

The grip you had on his hair was only tightening as he worked his magic.

With one small ‘pop’ he came up from your chest and kissed your lips.

“I wanna fuck you so good right now that you still remember it when you leave,” he says, looking down at you. You smile, once again bringing your lips up to his.

“Mm— let’s get you out of these too,” he says breathing into the kiss. His hands pull your jeans off from under you, tossing them onto the floor. Your panties and Peter’s towel are quick to follow.

Peter pushes himself down, placing small kisses on down stomach. He stops when he finally reaches your wet heat. He places one last light kiss on it before singling out the tiny bunch of nerves that lay right at the top. His tongue wastes no time moving in ways that make your head spin. Peter takes his time with this. All the sexual encounters you two have shared have usually been rushed and messy. It wasn’t supposed to be pretty. But not tonight, tonight Peter was giving you a show. The lewd noises you were make probably made it sound like you were giving him one too.

He alternated between softly sucking it and rubbing his tongue across it with just the right amount of pressure. His eyes never left yours. His hands, of course, continued the work on your chest that his mouth was once doing. His mouth dropped a little, as his tongue found its way in and out of your opening. You felt a ball form in your stomach. You began clenching every time his mouth found a new pleasurable spot. He knew you were close and was determined to get you there. He dug his head deeper into your heat, maintaining the motions from earlier. The new pressure was enough to send you over the edge. Your legs began to clench around his head, earning a deep moan from him.

“Shit Peter—” you cried as you rode out your orgasm. Peter’s head remained in between your legs as he tried to bring you to another orgasm.

“Ah—s-so sensitive Pete,” you whine out. Your hands tug on his hair. With one long lick, Peter pulls his mouth off of you, leaving a long line of saliva dripping as he pulls up.

“Oh my god, Pete.” you say trying to catch your breath.

“You okay?” he laughs.

You nod.

“I wanna return the favor…” you say trying to push yourself up.

“Later,” he said pushing you back down.

You furrowed your brow.

“It’s not that I don’t want you to, I just wanna take care of you right now.” he says, climbing atop of you again.

You smile, pulling him into another kiss.

“I also don’t know how long I could last if you went down on me right now,” he laughs. He lightly grinds against your leg, most likely to remind you of his still prevalent boner.

“I want you to get off too,” you say softly.

“Yeah?” he smirks. Your hand finds it’s way to his member, slowly stroking it up and down. Peter groans into your ear.

“Fuck baby,”

“Cmon, fuck me Peter…please,”

“Don’t have to ask me twice,” he laughs.

——————————————————————

Heyooo i’ve been gone a minuet but i just started my second year of college and things are getting kinda hectic lmao. Hope this one isn’t that bad, i may write a second part possible with more sexy time. Also if you couldn’t tell i def have a thing for Peter fresh out of the shower lmao. Let me know what you think!! <3 follow for more; requests are open!

[yourmomsgranddad]

— FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS

— PAIRING: Steve Harrington x fem!reader

— SUMMARY: You and Steve are friends but that changes once you have a dream, a really weird one.

— WORD COUNT: 2.3k

— WARNINGS: bad curse-y words lolz, pining, friends-to-lovers, mentions of sexual themes

"You suck."

You were stacking tapes on the shelf and your friend, Steve would not stop complaining about his love troubles.

Lately?

It has been this one girl he would not stop raving about. The only problem was he was scared to talk to her, which wasn't very Steve Harrington of him.

"Robin tell him he sucks."

She seemed uninterested.

"You suck. Why does he suck?" She asked, not really caring.

"Because he keeps complaining about how he doesn't know if this girl likes him back but he won't make his move. He's being a pussy." You taunted before going to the back to some loose tapes away.

He looked in your general direction surprised.

"Did you just fucking call me a pussy?"

You walked back out of the back, not looking phased at all, holding some boxed tapes.

"Yes. Because you are. I mean, if I liked a guy, I would tell him immediately because I am not a pussy."

He scoffed, rolling his eyes at you.

You, Steve, Robin go back a while.

All three of you went to the same school but you never interacted until summer started.

That's when Steve and Robin got the job at scoops ahoy.

From there, that's when you met.

The kid you babysat always wanted ice cream so eventually you two became regulars.

Robin made sure your order was always ready since you came at the same time everyday.

But one day, you came into the ice cream shop, at the same time you normally did, but this time without the little girl you were always with.

Robin and Steve wondered but just decided to walk up and ask you what was up.

"I got fired. The little girl told her mom I brought my friends and had a huge party. She even trashed her house to make it more believable. Guess she really hated me."

Both Robin and Steve looked at her with pity.

"Why don't you work here?" Steve offered with a shrug.

You looked up and wiped your tears. You agreed.

So you signed up and the next day you showed up for work but sadly, the mall had gone up in flames.

So there went that job.

But afterward, you found them both again and they found you a new job.

The video store.

Now you're here!

"So you like someone?" He asked with a smirk on his face as he tried to get information out of you.

"So what if I did? It's not like you would know. I don't have a crush on you, Harrington."

He rolled his eyes, going back behind the desk, sitting on his stool.

"I'm just saying why does she sound the way she does?"

You were now laying upside down on the edge of your bed. Steve came over to watch a movie with you but you got bored halfway through so you just started talking about anything that came to your mind.

Steve was laying on the floor opposite you, your faces almost on top of each others.

"Like a muppet?" He inferred, making you giggle.

"Exactly. She sounds like a muppet!" You joked, now it was his turn to laugh.

You both laid there, suffocating in sea of your own laughs. That was one of the things you loved about Steve. He could always make you laugh uncontrollably.

Even you were moving so much from laughter that you fell off of your bed, right on top of Steve.

You both let out a string of groans.

"Falling hurts like hell."

You went to stand up but as soon as you did you felt a huge weight on you. You looked down and Steve had wrapped his hands around your waist.

You relaxed as if he were your bed and he nuzzled his face into your neck as if you were his pillow.

"You smell so good." he complimented, muffled from his head being buried deep into your neck. "You would know. You bought the perfume I'm wearing for me."

You noticed how long you were on the floor, in Steve's arms. You felt a little awkward, laying on top of your friend for this long, but he didn't seem to find it weird.

"Um Steve, can I get up? You're hurting my chest." You asked, groaning a little, breaking him out of the trance he was in.

"Fine."

He opened his arms, allowing you to stand up.

There you were, in your bed.

Your lips on his.

You shuffled, smiling into the kiss. You pulled away to see what he looked like in full. You jumped in surprise when you noticed him.

It was Steve's lips that you were kissing, Steve's lap you were straddling right now, Steve's hands on your waist right now.

"You taste so good."

That was all he muttered before full sending it forward, knocking you down onto your back so now that he was on top of you.

For a second, it seemed like something was about to happen as he took his shirt off.

But...

You shot up from your bed and looked around.

It was nighttime and your blanket was draped over you and Robin.

Yeah, that was a dream. A dream that was making you question some things. But you were broken out of your trance when robin said something since she felt you wake up.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, just had a bad dream. S'all."

She nodded, almost immediately going back to sleep.

"And Steve was in it." You whispered mostly to yourself but since Robin was right next to you in your bed, she heard you so clearly. Which made her shoot up, kind of like you did a couple seconds ago.

"What?!" She shouted in a whisper in just as much shock as you had at the moment.

You shrugged, not knowing how to answer what she ask.

She put her hand on her chin, showing you she was very invested in your dream now.

"Spill."

"Well we were in my bed and we were kissing. I also was in his lap. And it seemed like we were about to do it."

Robin's eyes went wide as you shortly explained your slightly-confusing dream.

"Do you like him?" She asked after a beat of silence.

"I don't know!" You shouted, getting consumed by your confusion.

"Maybe your mind is just playing tricks on you." Robin said, reassuring you just a little bit.

"Or maybe I just want to do Steve Harrington." You mentioned with a smirk and just as you predicted Robin's face scrunched up into disgust.

"Ew! I'm going back to bed."

She turned around, putting her head in the pillow as you chuckled at her reaction.

You were now at work.

It was the next day from that dream and now you felt weird every time you looked at Steve.

Whenever you looked at him, all you could imagine was him pushing you against this desk and ripping off your-

"Y/n!"

You were brought out of your mind to see Steve looking at you with an angry expression on his face.

"Hmm?"

"I was calling you multiple times. How could you not hear me? I am literally in front of you." He mentioned, making you feel slightly stupid that you were daydreaming hard.

"Sorry. I was thinking about something. What did you need, Steve?"

"I need you to fix the display." He ordered with a confused tone to his voice but you paid no mind to that and just went to do what he told you.

You were in the middle of fixing the display when you heard kissy noises being made behind you.

You turned around to see Robin making fun of you.

"Why do you keep doing that?"

"Why do you keep staring at Steve with love in your eyes?"

"I was staring?"

You looked down in embarrassment as you realized you probably looked weird and didn't even notice.

"Yeah, you looked like you were taking his clothes off with your eyes." You grimaced just from the thought. "Right. Maybe I should stay out of fantasy-land while at work."

Robin nodded, agreeing with you completely before disappearing toward the back.

You went back to working when you felt someone tapping on your shoulder. You turned around and was met with Steve's confused face.

You were taken back to both dreams but pulled yourself forcefully out of it to pay attention to the conversation at-hand.

"Hey Y/n, are you okay? You've been weirdly silent since you got here. Which is very unlike you." He put his hand on your shoulder reassuringly.

Your eyes went wide as you stared at it with your dreamy eyes.

"Yeah! I'm fine." You answered, slowly pushing his hand off of your shoulder which he looked at with that same confused look from earlier.

His face tilted like he wasn't believing you one bit.

He got closer to you, making you back up in fear of where your brain might wander off to a dirty place. But then you realized if you backed up anymore you would bump into the display.

So you were stuck.

Suddenly, his hands went to your waist, trapping you even more. And it was as if time stopped. Your brain couldn't handle this kind of touch, especially not after your dreams.

"Are you sure? I just want to make sure you're alright. You know I worry about you, Y/n/n."

You rolled your eyes, not wanting to tell him.

"If I tell you, will you drop it?"

He nodded, not taking his hands away.

"Remember I told you I didn't have a crush on you?" You asked, making him nod. "I don't. However, I had a dirty dream about you last night and a couple minutes ago."

His jaw dropped. He seemed to not believe what you were telling him.

But it slowly faded into a smile, making you regret telling him anything. He started wiggling his eyebrows at you, causing you to grimace.

"What did we do in your dream, Y/n?"

"Gross, Steve, gross."

You pushed his arms out of you, going back to the desk. He shrugged, seemingly not understanding while you thought it was gross.

"What were we doing in your dream? I need to know. It was my body."

It was pitch black outside.

Thundering every few minutes and loud rain hitting your windows as hard as possible.

You wondered how anybody could sleep through this. You surely couldn't.

So you turned your dim lamp on and started reading to take your mind off of the scary thunder.

You were getting deep into your book so it was definitely taking your mind off of the thunder when you heard something other than rain tapping your window.

You looked over to see Steve standing in the thundering rain.

You bolted out of your bed and went to open the window.

He hopped through immediately.

"Steve? What are you doing here? If you can't tell, it's raining outside." You mentioned as he didn't already know.

He turned around, almost looking sad. "I know you're scared of the loud thunder so I drove over here so you would get some sleep." You smiled slightly, happiness spreading from cheek to cheek.

You forgot you told him about your fear of thunderstorms.

"I didn't know you remembered that."

"Of course I would. You're my best friend."

Your smile faltered slightly.

You figured after you told Steve about your dreams, things would be different. either they would stop or he would realize that he liked you back and you two would be together.

Sadly neither of those things happened.

Your dreams were happening almost every night now. You were lucky enough if your dream didn't have him as the star.

But they did make you realize something.

You didn't just want to be Steve Harrington's best friend.

You had finally turned the light out and you were supposed to be going to sleep but instead you were watching Steve sleep like a weirdo.

You laid there, wondering all the thoughts that came to his mind, all the dreams he ever had, and definitely how he felt about you.

Oddly enough, it was like he felt you staring because his eyes fluttered open.

"You're supposed to be sleep." He mentioned, his voice deep and raspy since he was just asleep, his eyes still slightly closed.

"I can't. I'm wondering who was hiding in your hair."

He tiredly chuckled before opening his eyes fully, taking in your full image.

You looked tired but it was as if your body wouldn't let you sleep based off of fear.

"Remember the dreams I told you about a couple weeks ago?"

He nodded, kind of feeling concerned from the look on your face.

"I thought they were just dreams but turns out, I think I might actually have a crush on you, Harrington."

His expression remained unfazed, almost as if he was thinking about what you said very attentively. "I know that seems really weird since we're friends but it's just how I was feeling. That's all."

His thought process went fast since in a matter of seconds, he was smiling brightly toward you.

"Have I ever told you how cute you are when you're scared? You're like a bunny rabbit." You smiled at the relation that he thought you were like a bunny.

You scooted your head closer so your noses were almost touching.

"Have I ever told you how cute you are all time?"

Now it was his turn to smile and scooch closer. Now your noses were definitely touching and your mouths were now hovering over one another's, just begging to touch.

Your mouth opened as if you were about say something but were cut off immediately by Steve slamming his lips onto yours.

Somehow it was exactly like your dream, one hand on your neck that was pulling unbelievably closer. A second hand on your waist, pulling yours closer to him.

You were enjoying melting into him finally.

But then he pulled away, out of breath.

"What was that?" You asked, trying to catch your breath.

"I'm making your dream come true, baby," was all you heard before everything faded away.

But you were in for the time of your life.

[aizawaskittenwhore]

𝘯𝘴𝘧𝘸 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘯𝘴

≛ 𝘧𝘵. 𝘪𝘻𝘶𝘬𝘶, 𝘣𝘢𝘬𝘶𝘨𝘰, 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘰, 𝘥𝘢𝘣𝘪, 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘬𝘪, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘸𝘬𝘴.

≛ 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘦: 𝘴𝘮𝘶𝘵. 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵.

≛ 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴: 1𝘬

≛ 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴: 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘺 𝘥𝘦𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘥𝘢𝘤𝘳𝘺𝘱𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘢 /𝘤𝘳𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘴𝘦𝘹, 𝘦𝘹𝘩𝘪𝘣𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘮, 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘣𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨/𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘺, 𝘧𝘦𝘮𝘥𝘰𝘮 (𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘬𝘪), 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘣𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘶𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯.

𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 18. 𝘥𝘶𝘩.

𝘪𝘻𝘶𝘬𝘶:

i’m gonna be honest

that whole “innocent bby deku🥺” shit is played out. this man will demolish your pussy and will not apologize for it.

izuku has the full capacity to be rough in bed, so don’t let his sweet and demure presence fool you

he’s really into overstim surprisingly enough

watching you stir and keen as you cum again for the third time in a row fills him with a sense of pride

knowing nobody else could make you whine like this, make you sputter and stumble over each word, make you cream all over the dick the way he does

he also adores fucking you to the point where you can’t form a comprehensible sentence

he’ll give you deep, slow strokes while holding a bullet vibe directly to your swollen clit, pine eyes sparkling as he watches you plead for him to stop, yet buck your hips into him, chasing another orgasm.

calls you bunny instead of puppy bc ew

“you’re so insatiable, bunny. you like it when i—ah, fuck!—tease your pussy like this? ‘like it when i take what’s mine?”

the pleasure is overwhelming, insurmountable as he brings you to that prepice over and over again until you’re crying.

he’ll then flip you onto your stomach, hands digging into the dimples and slopes of your hips before absolutely impaling you on his length

he’s thick, and comes in at a solid 6-7 inches, so you’re always sore after a round or two

also

breeding kink. like a major one.

izuku wasn’t always the most confident in his abilities as a boyfriend let alone a lover

so when you started letting him cum inside you it was a huge boost

likes breeding you before work so he can think about the guys that hit on you in the break room smelling the scent of sex all over your body as you walk past them, sticky white fluid creeping down the leg of your pantyhose.

he couldn’t keep other guys from looking at you, but he could damn sure remind you of who you belonged to.

oh, and he’ll slide two fingers in once he’s done and scoop as much of his cum between them as possible before slipping them in your mouth so he can watch you suck it all off

this mf is possessive and nasty.

𝘣𝘢𝘬𝘶𝘨𝘰:

facefucking.

that’s it. send tweet

nah but in all seriousness, katsuki loves watching your eyes well up with tears as you squeeze and milk his dick for all it’s worth.

he’s a good 7-7.5 inches

not an insane amount of girth but the length more than compensates for it

most definitely uses it as a punishment

and isn’t afraid to do it while you’re in public either

which brings us to his exhibition kink

he’s very prideful when it comes to his reputation as a hero, so you would think that it would keep him from doing anything scandal worthy

wrong

it only adds to the searing arousal he gets from watching your tongue fondle his sensitive head, knees bruised from being beneath him for so long

it’s a power trip for him, especially if he’s in costume

depending on your behavior, he’ll be generous and let you swallow while praising your performance

or he’ll wrap a hand around the back of your neck, slide your mouth off of his spit-soaked cock, and stroke himself until his cum splatters all over your eyelashes, fully debauching you in the desolate alleyway

he’s made you walk back home with cum all over your face before, after you’d been particularly bratty over the course of a week

“katsuki! i can’t walk back home like this, what if someone notices?!”

“should’ve thought about that before you decided to visit me while you weren’t wearing any fuckin’ panties. nasty little girl...now hurry up and get a move on, and you better not wipe it off either.”

loves the thrill of humiliating you

unrelated, but he’s an ass man through and through, taking such pleasure in watching it jiggle and ripple under each heavy blow he delivers

takes photos of the marks afterwards and has an album for em.

he also loves fucking you on different surfaces around your penthouse (and his agency)

the man is territorial

so what better way to mark his territory than by making his gorgeous girlfriend squirt and cream all over it?

𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘰:

babe i am so sorry for your neighbors

cause if there’s nothing else shinsou loves it’s to make you scream

he’s got a corruption kink, but not in the way most people do

he doesn’t give a damn if you’re sweet and innocent, or if you’ve got the mouth of a sailor and could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch

what matters to him is making you lose your composure.

one day you’d been anticipating a call back from a job interview you’d gone to a few days prior

and shinsou just so happened to be observing your blissed-out expression as he ground into you from below, your body atop his

when your damned phone started ringing

being the sly little shit that he is, he saw an opportunity

“answer the phone pretty girl...don’t wanna keep them waiting, do you?”

reaching for your buzzing cell, you press the green ‘accept’ button, raising the device to your ear as you jolt forward

“hello, may i speak to y/n?” a chipper voice chimed through the receiver.

“t-this is sh-she. how can i—ah!—help you?” you garble your words, trying to suppress your moans

hitoshi merely takes this as a challenge, opting to drive into you deeper whilst trying to keep the noise down, it’s less fun when it’s obvious what you two are doing

his dick is thick as FUCK. 6 going on 7 inches but honestly you couldn’t give less of a fuck with the way he’s stretching you

surprisingly enough you managed your way through the phone call, telling the white lie of “helping the neighbors move”

but little did you know this was only the beginning of hitoshi’s new favorite pastime

he’s another exhibitionist too

so uh...good luck with that

remote control vibrators on dinner dates, fingers stuffed deep inside your sloppy cunt while he makes small talk with your mom at the dinner table,

even kneeling beneath your desk and sending you to heaven and back while you’re on a video call with your fucking boss.

he’s addicted to watching you fall apart, and is more than willing to apply that pressure.

𝘥𝘢𝘣𝘪:

dabi’s dick would fuck anyone stupid.

let’s make that clear.

it’s canon that he’s got a jacob’s ladder, blah blah blah, but let’s discuss how fucking pretty it is

creeping in at a firm eight inches, and about 4 and a half in girth with a drool-worthy mauve tip, his shaft slightly lighter than the rest of his tanned, unscarred skin

it’s dangerous, barbells running up the underside of his shaft or not

definitely into temperature play

and i’m not talking about that soft shit like warming up his fingers whilst they’re plunging in and out of your sweet center

no no no

that fucker will BRAND you and will not apologize

you’re his pretty little cumdump, and he’ll stake his claim upon your body how ever the hell he pleases

degradation is a given.

“—what a fuckin’ whore. tch, you really think you deserve this dick?”

“how about you get on your knees and beg for it then if you’re so damn needy.”

“quit your god damn whining, or i swear i’ll leave you spread out on this fuckin’ bar for shiggy to find. maybe i’ll even get a promotion for giving him such a slutty little bitch to use.”

“what’s wrong? does it hurt sweetheart? can’t take it after you talked all that shit earlier?” you shake your head no, thighs trembling as you struggle to maintain the position dabi’s folded you into. “...good.” he smirks, eyes gleaming with malice before pounding you to filth, cries spilling from your mouth as you beg for release, knowing he won’t give it to you.

making you cry? a specialty of dabi’s. your tears get him harder than anything; to watch your lips quiver as you sniffle, wiping away tears while he palms himself through his sweats

has shown you off to shigaraki, and will not hesitate to tongue your fluids off his digits while carrying on a full conversation with the other man.

after all, when you know your toy’s better than someone else’s, you tend to brag.

𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘬𝘪:

speaking of this mf

he’s the reason gamer boys get the rep of having massive dicks

cause god damn did you not expect this man to be slinging around eight bordering on nine inches of dick. four and a half to five inches of girth. poor you.

he’s also got a penchant for angry sex, so if that’s not enough of an indication that you’re going to have trouble walking afterwards i don’t know what is

but one thing he loves more than taking you apart piece by piece and cumming inside of you with zero remorse?

doing it when he’s in the middle of a game, and he’s online with the party’s voice chat.

“mmm—god, you really will do anything i tell you....swallowing every inch while these guys get to listen, and you’re not even embarrassed, you’re getting off on it!”

“i love little sluts like you, always doing whatever it takes just to have a cock pry them open at all times. that’s what you are, right? my little slut, made for me to do whatever i want to.”

yes, he’s made you whine so sweetly for him, cry as you beg him to touch you, while he plays fucking valorant.

and you can’t count how many times he’s mocked the way you gag and choke on his massive length while he played genshin impact with random guys online.

is a sucker for a good set of nudes, and isn’t afraid to ask for them on a regular basis

plus he just likes taking pictures/videos of you in general, saving them to a private album of his phone for him to use when you’re not there

he may parade you around as though you’re a lifeless fuckdoll, but if nothing else he’s possessive, and would rather relive the pain of losing to all might than let another man see you the way he does

but i’ll be honest, tomura’s not always a teasing, possessive, vindictive asshole with a huge dick.

he’s also a teasing, possessive, vindictive asshole with a thing for being dominated....and a huge dick.

see, it balances out!

it started with a bet that if he lost another round of mortal kombat you got to peg him

it took a lot of convincing, but he agreed to the terms, certain he’d win regardless

and after button smashing like your life depended on it with subzero, you managed to secure the win.

a grin stapled itself to your face after being treated to two hours of tomura’s incessant sobs and wails

“mhm—please...i can’t take it—ah! fuck, fuck, fuck! right there!”

“don’t make me work for it, i promise you’ll never be player two again, just please let me cum—m’ so close..”

game nights are always fun with him, you can count on it.

𝘩𝘢𝘸𝘬𝘴:

my god my god

i’m gonna say it right now: keigo doesn’t eat pussy for you.

he does it for him.

and that makes all the difference in the fucking world when he’s pulling you to sit on his face

scruff scratching at your inner thighs deliciously as he makes you squirt alllll over aforementioned facial hair, rolling your hypersensitive clit between soft lips and a fluid tongue

he could stay between your thighs for hours and hours on end

will propose to devour you in the most inappropriate of places

and honestly? isn’t the least bit ashamed about it. elevators, in front of large office windows just a few stories above the street where you’re just barely visible to the people below,

on endeavor’s decorative towels after he spread them out on the floor so he could fuck you senseless on top of them, etc.

the flame hero had pissed him off earlier, and he needed to exert some petty rage. this was most sensible use of his energy.

also in case it wasn’t obvious: breeding kink. duh.

no thoughts head empty just hawks begging to breed you during his rut

“come on pretty girl, let me make you a momma....can’t wait to stuff you full of my chicks....”

he blushes so deeply when he’s close to cumming

and boy does he fucking whine

dick is just as pretty as he is, he’s a good 6 inches with a three inch girth; tip flushed and pink

definitely cherishes intimacy during sex

and will certainly go out of his way to make sure you feel comfortable/desired

he could have all the money/fame in the world

and it still wouldn’t compare to the feeling of your thighs suffocating him while he slurps at your cunt like it’s his last meal.

[beaversatemygrandma]

Remember how i said i was scared i may have caught the rona even though i never leave the house anymore? I didn’t. I’m fine.  I had a fever for 2-3 days and my whole body feels like ass. But I’m good. Physically. 

Turns out the sheer pain coming from my out-of-date glasses prescription and my wisdom tooth is driving me to absolute hell and my body wants these things fixed so i can go back to regularly functioning but the US has other plans.  I can hardly speak from the pain in my jaw, i at least don’t want to speak. I haven’t worn my glasses all day today because it got to the point where i couldn’t even move my eyes without the feeling as if they were going to burst out of my head. And somehow my body had a fever of 101 that went down to 96.5 (BELOW Regular body temp btw) at night and went right back up in the morning. 

I feel like I’m not only losing my mind in quarantine but losing control of my own health because i can’t afford to go out and get this shit fixed. 

[clarencethemouse]

Peter Maximoff Relationship Headcanons

cause I’m currently suffering brain rot for this man

also, this is exclusively the X-Men saga Quicksilver. He’s just a little more superior than the MCU one, fight me. 

first of all I headcanon this man as bisexual with a lean towards women

so take that as you must

and you are a human in this. I may make another one where you are a mutant, but for now let’s keep things simple

you knew about his mutation immediately. It’s kind of hard for him to hide it

at first you were weirded out. D.C wasn’t loaded with a mutant population for a reason

but you got over it quickly, and you two hit it off within time

I don’t think it would have been as fast paced of a relationship as it could have been. There were things to get used to, and Peter can be a little much to handle at times

but things worked out

so this boy is a loser. We all know it

his inability to keep a job or maintain his own place in society has rendered him living in his mom’s basement. You know it’s something he can’t control, and you don’t fault him for it

he faults himself for it, though

he hates knowing that you have to pay for the majority of fancy dates and such. He does steal you some nice things, though, to make up for it. 

9/10 times you make him return it

that once you just really liked the vinyl and couldn’t part with it

you adore his sisters, Wanda and Lorna

you were in the room when Lorna’s mutations sparked for the first time. It was quiet frightening

Peter fully expected you to leave after that incident. His mutant family was surely too much for you to handle now

so what did you do after several days of pouting and whining from him?

you pushed him on the basement couch and showed him how you were staying, if you get my drift

a lot of your time together is spent at the arcade

you hate going to bars with him cause you know he’ll always win drinking games. You gets drunk in the process of the slight offhand chance that his metabolism may fail him on night, and he zooms you home. This became a routine for you

so much as to the point that he started faking drunkness just to let you feel like you won

your ego got a good boost that night

if you were together before he joined the X-Men, he quietly left town for a few weeks. He tried to get a word to you, but things were difficult... all things Apocalypse considered

you def thought he ghosted you and skipped town. Maybe he got in too much trouble with the law and couldn’t escape this time through the safety of his sister’s closet

this launched an interrogation of his mom. She claimed she knew exactly where he went, but promised not to tell you until word was received from Peter that things were safe

this launched you into a frenzy

where had he gone that could be so dangerous? when would you ever see your boyfriend again?

once things settled down and everything was restored at the school, Peter begged and begged and begged Charles to let him invite you to live at the school

Charles gave in, happy to incorporate more regular folk into the school

Peter rushed home to find you crying in your bedroom. It had been two months since he left. You were feeling things

you smacked him upon sight

he deserved it

fast forward a few weeks and you’re fully moved into the mansion, just in time for a new semester to start

since the loss of several teachers as of late, Charles was happy to have anyone new in staff. He didn’t care that you weren’t qualified

you and Peter got married a year later

it was definitely something to settle into. You didn’t feel right for the student to hand their problems to, seeing as you never experienced life as a mutant. You never experienced their same struggles

but you were willing to hand out boy advice to one specific twelve year old girl who you got close with, Charmaine. She was in your first class of the morning, and you two developed a mentor-apprentice bond

ha funny story

so Charmaine has the ability to pass through walls. One night on a dare she passed through your and Peter’s bedroom... and you had to beg Jean with blood sweat and tears to wipe her memory the next morning

you eventually got far more adjusted to life at the mansion

and then Jean became the Phoenix

[mercy-burning]

My Forever — Part 4

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Summary: The funeral arrives, and high tensions arise. Category: SMUT (18+), a bit of fluff, angst Content: Strong language, funeral service, kissing, fingering, exhibitionism, yelling, crying, Spencer gets slapped in the face Word Count: 4.4k

MAIN MASTERLIST | SERIES MASTERLIST

NOTE: SURPRISE, I was finally able to finish this last night before bed lol. I wanted something to look forward to after my interview today, so this is going up while I’m there. Hopefully I come back home to some chaos (I fully expect for you all to yell at me hehehe).

———

Despite the fact that funerals are always seen as rainy or gloomy in the movies, the day of Grandma's funeral is actually quite perfect.

Well, in terms of weather, at least.

Mom is holding herself together nicely, which I'm glad for, although it's easy to tell how all the emotions are flooding back to her. I'm sure that once the service actually starts and everyone starts talking about how great Grandma was, she'll lose the wall she's putting up and realize it's been made of glass.

In fact, Adam and I came up with a secret pact to keep an eye on her and make sure everything goes as smoothly as possible today. He's on the physical and emotional comfort duty while my job is to make sure none of my distant, erratic family members cause a scene. It's not likely that any of them will actually do it, but there's a reason I've described them as erratic. Really, it makes more sense to me now that I'm older why we've never visited any of them over the course of my life aside from holidays.

I myself am a bit more nervous today now that I know Spencer is actually showing up. I'm still not entirely sure why he wants to be here, either. With as many funerals as I imagine he's been to, I don't understand why he would want to put himself through this. I appreciate his kindness of course, but still, he's been around enough death in his lifetime, and I assumed that's why he actually quit his job and went to teaching.

I suppose I could ask him about it when we get a moment alone, but my mind can't help but wander immediately to a situation where I do it, and as a response he romantically tells me he couldn't spend a day without me, knowing that I was in emotional anguish and needed him to comfort me. He would kiss me sweetly and wipe away my tears and hold me and never let me go.

Not at all does the possibility cross my mind that he could just want to be there for his ex-girlfriend who he's good friends with and her daughter, who he obviously cares enough about to sleep with on a regular basis.

Today isn't about Spencer, though. It's not about our tryst or how I might actually be falling in love with him again.

Today is about celebrating my grandmother's life with my family.

I do my best to push him out of my mind, and for a while it works. I talk with family members for a little while and reunite with our old pastor, who I haven't seen since Mom's wedding (Grandma was the religious one out of us all, and Mom only decided to have a church wedding to honor her after she got sick).

But then he shows up, and in just a split second all sense of self-control is begging to be let out of its cage. Here we are at a funeral for someone I've known my whole life, and all I can stand to think about his how good Spencer looks wearing all black. There's a contrast between the dark of his clothing and the slight gray color coming through in small tufts of hair. It all suits him so incredibly well that when he hugs me I nearly fall to my knees.

I see him talk to Mom and Adam briefly as I'm whisked away shortly after to monitor my cousin's baby while she goes to the bathroom, and as I hold the sleeping child in my arms, I can tell today will be long and exhausting.

Maybe I can find a way to avoid him... I mean, Lord knows I'm surrounded by people that will want to play catch-up and tell me "crazy" stories about my grandmother that I've already heard thousands of times. And sure, even that will be exhausting, but if it means I have a way to keep my mind off of Spencer and his tendency to make my brain turn to mush, then... for Mom's sake, that's what I'll have to do.

Easy.

———

Not easy.

Not in the slightest.

I swear, it's like Grandma is rolling in her grave, laughing at me and plotting with God to punish me for my sins, because this man is fucking everywhere.

Just when I think I've managed to avoid him, I turn around and see him only a few people away, talking innocently with Adam, or sitting by himself and observing. One time I find him standing in the corner of the room, obviously looking at me with an expression I can't read, and it drives me insane.

Part of me wants to go up to him and convince him to leave out of desperation, but I know it's unfair. I've dug this hole myself, and I can either maintain it and stay above-ground or fall inside and get hurt. As long as I keep my cool, no one will know a thing.

Besides, today isn't even about us. It's about Grandma, and Mom.

The service starts earlier than planned, thanks to a surprising amount of people that showed up on time. I'm grateful, of course, because it's easier on Mom but also because it means it's less time I have to spend trying to get Spencer out of my mind in a room full of people who would absolutely flip if they found out what we were doing behind closed doors.

He's off my mind almost entirely once things get started, though, and in an hour's time I'm fighting tears.

Mom tells a story about the day I turned two years old, when all she had was herself and my neverending tendency to cry whenever I wasn't sleeping in her arms. My dad was nowhere to be found, almost everyone she'd ever known lived far away, and the only person who ever had a full clue as to what was going on in her life was Grandma. The two of them took me to the zoo that day, and it was the first day in months that I hadn't cried for an extended period of time.

I still have the little hat that Grandma picked out for me that day, on the tall wooden post of my childhood bed.

Mom tells the story with tears in her eyes, and she looks at me the entire time. Beside me, Adam reaches for my hand, and I grab it with all my might, the cool metal of his wedding ring and the love for my mother it holds grounding me in reality as I try not to make a sound.

We've come a long way since then, and even though Grandma is gone, her love for us is here. It's what's gotten us through some of the toughest parts of our life.

I was supposed to say a few things later, but when Mom's speeches are done and she steps down to come sit with me while the pastor reads some bible passages, she holds me tight and says that I don't have to go up. If I were stronger, I might be able to persist, but I'm relieved when she tells me.

We never separate for the rest of the service. A few others come up at random to tell stories, but it's all nice and short, and then it's all over. If anyone wants to visit Grandma's grave, they're welcome to, but with the threat of rain sometime today, we decided not to hold anything there formally.

Besides, we've been there so often I'm sure Mom doesn't want to go again unless absolutely necessary.

People shuffle out of the church as some of Grandma's favorite songs play over the speakers. They sound cheap and horrible, but it's not really supposed to matter. Actually, I think she would have rather enjoyed the low quality sound. Something about it being vintage. I can hear her saying it in that slightly judgemental-of-my-generation tone that's enough to make me roll my eyes but not enough to make me argue with her, and I smile at the thought.

Once again, distant family members and even some people I've never met, stop by to give condolences and to hug us, and Mom seems to know them all while I just stand there awkwardly with Adam. He's joining in conversations at least, but he's better at holding conversation anyway, especially in awkward situations.

I don't even see him, but I feel him, a familiar pari of arms wrapping around me from behind, and I turn around to immediately nestle into his chest.

My brain doesn't even comprehend what's happening until Mom calls out to him warmly, and I freeze. Still, I can't seem to let go of him. All I want to do is be in Spencer's arms, and so that's where I stay.

It seems my emotional state is good enough of a cover to make this seem normal.

"You're stopping by at the house, right?" Mom asks him. "You're not busy?"

"No, I'm not busy."

"Why don't you two go ahead then... Maybe calm down a bit. No one will get there until I leave anyway, so that gives you some time... You alright with that, honey?"

Mom's hand brushes the hair from my face and she rubs my shoulder. I'm still nestled into Spencer's chest, but I nod all the same, turning a little to look at her. "You sure? You'll be okay?"

"Of course. I'll be okay." Just after, I can see her look up at her ex-boyfriend and mouth 'thank you,' and in response he just squeezes me tightly.

"C'mone, Y/N," he whispers softly into my hair, and I can feel his lips press into the top of my head.

For a moment, despite everything, this is the most normal I've felt in years. Everything feels eerily, and yet incredibly, right.

———

My mind is jumbled, swimming with too many thoughts and emotions as we take Spencer's car to the house. I focus on the one large cloud in the sky ahead of us, wondering if it might bring any rain before the day is done, like it's supposed to for weeks now.

I don't even notice when we take a wrong turn, not until we end up at McDonald's and Spencer's ordering through the drive-thru—20-piece chicken nuggets, a Coke, and a large fry. It's what I order every time we've gone, usually after we've been so wrapped up in each other that we'd forgotten about food. In a quick pinch, since neither of us ever had food in the house, we drove to McDonald's and he always took three chicken nuggets, a couple fries, and stopped at a local drive-thru Thai place for himself.

The memory of it all brings a small smile to my face as we wait in line for the next car to pull up.

"What are you thinking about?" he asks gently.

"Every other McDonald's trip we've taken," I answer with a smile. "Those are some of my favorite summer memories..."

His face had already been soft, but it seems to soften further, like taffy under the sun when I tell him that. It's like the look my Mom gave him when he held me only minutes ago, only sweeter.

"Mine, too," he whispers. His hand reaches out to touch mine, but before our skin can connect, the car behind us honks, and we jump. The car in front of us has disappeared entirely, Spencer looks apologetic and anxiously pulls forward, and I can't help the wide grin spread across my face at the normalcy of it all.

We don't say anything else for the rest of the ride, other than when we pass the Thai place and I ask him if he wants to stop and go back, to which he replies, "Not hungry."

I sip on my Coke while clutching the bag for dear life in my lap, willing the heat of the food to stay trapped while we make our way home.

I'm capable of opening the car and front door, but Spencer does it all for me, even taking the key from my bag to unlock the front door. I step inside, kick my shoes off, and he immediately goes for the thermostat, always turned off but air conditioning switched on right when we come home.

It's crazy to me how much it feels like no time has passed. This is just like every food trip we've taken before other than the formal clothes and the absence of Thai food. But our path to the kitchen even remains the same.

He takes his spot in Mom's chair while I sit across from him at my own, taking my food out and spreading it in front of me like a feast. One carton of nuggets gets opened and five of them immediately go the other side to be even. Spencer opens my BBQ cup and sets it beside the carton while I open the other one and dip a couple fries into it.

"I just opened one for you," he says with a laugh.

I gesture to the twenty chicken nuggets which I know I will never finish. "Now it's for you. Eat up."

"I'm not hungry."

"But you always take three of my chicken nuggets. And besides, after skipping Thai, I'm not letting you stray from tradition any bit further. So eat up."

He never stops smiling at me, white teeth and squinting eyes that make my heart soar. Even as he takes a nugget, the smile doesn't falter.

We eat in silence then for a few moments, and I try not to think about the rest of the world. Any minute now Mom could be coming home, but it won't matter because we're just eating and smiling. We're two normal people taking pleasure in each other's company in a wholesome, fulfilling way, and on a day like today with its tears and choked words, I think it's the least I can do to embrace that.

As predicted, I can't finish all the food, but Spencer must have decided he was, in fact, hungry after all, because whatever I don't touch, he does. All of it is gone within twenty minutes, and I'm not even thinking about the fact that Mom isn't home yet.

Which is why it's natural for me to lean down and kiss him on the cheek while I pass him to throw out the remnants of our feast. I come back, still not thinking about it when he pulls me onto his lap with a laugh and attacks my neck with over-exaggerated feral kisses that make me squirm and shriek.

And I certainly don't think about it when my hands knot through his hair and bring his face to mine, connecting our lips and giving me butterflies all over.

I don't know how long we sit there, in this uncomfortable-ass dining room chair while he kisses me like the world might end. It's sweet, yet intense, his tongue is gentle and insistent all the same, and his hands roam my body with such care and thought that it never crosses my mind that at any moment this could end in disaster. How could it, when it feels so right? So normal?

It's not even purely lustful at this point. The love I'm feeling for this man at this moment in time is stronger than anything I've felt in a long time. He knows me in and out, takes care of me and does things he know will make me smile, he feels like home.

Home...

Why is that word so prominent?

...home!

...

"Y/N, we're home!"

The speed at which I fly off Spencer's lap and fix my clothes is incredible. He does the same, awkwardly shifting in the chair to hide a forming boner and ultimately deciding on scurrying to the bathroom down the hall where no one will even know he's just been in here.

Just in case, I leave the kitchen and navigate to the front room, catching Mom and Adam just as they're taking off their shoes. Maybe I can give him a few minutes...

"Hey! Oh, you brought McDonald's..."

"Figured you might be hungry," Mom says, holding the bag out.

"I was, but uh... Spencer and I picked some up on the way back, we just finished."

"Oh, good. Where is he?"

"Bathroom."

"Well, hopefully he's able to stay a bit longer. Maybe he can keep you company while we entertain everyone— I know you don't have much in common with your relatives, and you guys seem to get along pretty well."

If only you knew...

"Yeah, I... don't know what he plans on doing. We'll see."

"You two do get along, right? I'm not imagining that? It's not weird at all?"

"No! No, you're right, everything's great... It's uh... It's been nice catching up."

Her smile is sickeningly sweet, it almost makes me sad to know she doesn't even know the half of what catching up we've actually been up to. "Oh, well, good. I'm glad we can all put the past behind us and get along well. Hell, after the shit we've been through, we deserve it."

She and Adam pass me and head to the kitchen with kind smiles, but mine fades once they're out of view.

Just like that, I'm a nervous wreck all over again.

———

He's been watching me all afternoon.

Whether I'm speaking with one of my cousins or just scrolling my phone while I sip on some water, I can feel him keeping an eye on me. It's protective in a way. I noticed it, too, when we were in the church. A room full of people he didn't know and an ex-girlfriend with no idea what's been going on behind closed doors, and rather than bolting like I would in his position, he watches out for me and risks being found out.

Because it's not like his looks are subtle in any way, shape, or form. I'll catch his eye, and he's either protective, or dreamy-eyed, or sometimes even lustful. It's a wide range, all of them holding an intensity that would give him away instantaneously.

I should be worried, and in a way I am... But at the moment I find it extremely hot.

I hate that I feel this way. Really, I do, especially on today of all days. But then I can't help but think about the kisses we've shared in the past few days, the moment we shared in the drive-thru, and the constant smiles and domesticity from the moment we parked on the street in front of the house....

All of it makes me realize that whether I want to call this just a summer fling or not, he's always meant more to me than that.

I can't ignore that any longer.

Lately all I've been doing is overthinking, and I don't want to do that anymore. I want to carry out what I know, and what I know with the most certainty is that I want him, and I need him. I need him to know just how in this I am, how deeply he inhabits my being and every waking thought I have. Even when I'm not thinking about him blatantly, somehow it always comes back to him anyway.

So, against my better judgement, I approach him and get him to a corner of the room that's somewhat discreet. People can still look over and see us at any time, but we're far enough away that at least they wouldn't hear what I'm about to say.

"You okay?" is his first question. He gets it out before I even have the chance to open my mouth. The sentiment is sweet. But right now I'm not looking for something sweet, and by the look he gets in his eye when I finally speak to him, I can tell he's gotten rid of his sweet tooth as well.

"Coat closet. Five minutes."

I don't even give him time to process, nor do I give myself time to gauge his reaction. Whether that's good in the long-run or not I can't be sure, but the long-run isn't on my mind as I make my way up the stairs and into the small closet next to my bedroom. Instead, I'm thinking of how two days from now I will be leaving, and once again our affair will be cut short. But right now he's here, and I'm here, and our tension is as palpable as ever, so damn it, I'm going to make the most of it.

I told him five minutes, but he shows up in about two, the door opening and closing immediately yet quietly. He pulls the string beside us to turn on the light, but I pull it to turn it off.

"Just replaced the lightbulb," I explain, grabbing him by the jacket and pulling him to me. "Too bright."

"Mmm," he huffs back shortly, already leaning down to kiss me.

What starts off so tender even in its urgency becomes rushed and heated in only a matter of mere seconds. All it takes is his hand snaking through my hair to send me into overdrive, and I'm hooking my right leg around his thigh to bring us closer the second he does it.

My pants are a little too tight, though, making it uncomfortable, and I huff, bringing my leg down.

Spencer laughs. "You ok, there?"

I kiss him, hoping he'll skip the teasing and go straight to the finish line— or at least start sprinting towards it.

He laughs over my lips, but accepts my vigor with grace, smoothly gliding his hands down my body. His tongue slips sweetly into my mouth right at the same time he unsnaps the button of my pants, making me whine out in need.

His fingers maneuver swiftly down the front of my body and slip past all the fabric with no problem, until finally, they work to give me sweet release.

Low vibrations tumble from Spencer's throat and into my mouth as his middle finger explores my cunt, testing the waters.

"God, you're so wet..." he grumbles, shifting us around in the closet so we have a little more room. He kisses me again, continuing to delve his finger in deeper and deeper, and his other hand grips my hair so tight I'll probably have a headache afterwards.

I reach out to touch him, to make him go faster or something, but he lets go of my hair and grabs my wrist, taking his other finger out of me to come back to my clit.

"Let me take care of you, love," he whispers, lacing our fingers together. I can feel so many things at once, love and lust and urgency and infatuation... All of it consumes me and brings me to life, all because of that one word and all its implications.

Love.

I can't hold it back anymore.

I squeeze his hand and revel in what the other is doing to my clit, letting myself get wrapped up in his affection when I whisper, "I love you," and whimper when he says it back and closes the distance between our lips.

I love you...

Our confession burns through my brain like a wildfire, just as brightly as the fire in the pit of my belly as I near orgasm.

It's so bright.

So bright...

Holy fuck, why is it so bright?

A shrieked, "Oh my God!" sends my soul out of my body and Spencer's hand out of my pants.

Suddenly it's like the sky has come crashing down, bringing with it the sun and all it's burning, blazing fury. It sets my body on fire and traps me while I tremble, every part of my soul knowing that it's finally over.

My life is completely, indefinitely over.

I don't know what to do with myself as Mom pulls Spencer out of the closet and throws him to the ground. She looks at me, then back to him, and when she looks at me that final time, her face nearly destroys my soul.

She's sad. I can tell in the way she pouts her lip, and the way her body shakes. Her eyes are welling up with tears and her mouth is trembling. And when I finally have the courage to move, to reach out for her as an instinct to comfort her, she flinches, turning her whole body from me.

"I... can't even look at you," she chokes out, closer to sobbing with every syllable.

"Eve, it's not her f—"

Her sadness is pure anger now as she whips to Spencer, who's gotten up off the floor. He doesn't stay steady for long, because her hand flies out and thwacks him in the face, sending him back a few steps.

"Don't you dare say another word, you motherfucker! Get out of my house! I don't ever want to see your face again, do you understand me!"

Spencer looks over at me then, but only for a few seconds before Mom nearly tackles him to the ground again. But by now, Adam is behind her, holding her back while she sobs incoherencies. He's angry, I can tell, but he keeps his cool considering, giving Spencer just one look to let him know that he better do what she says.

And he does.

Without another word or another glance, Spencer leaves, keeping his head down as he disappears from sight.

My gut instinct is to walk out after him, to tell him to wait, but as soon as I take a step out of the closet, Mom turns to me and points a finger. I jump back, afraid that if Adam lets her go she'll start running at me.

"I swear to god, Y/N, if you walk out that front door, I better not ever see you come through it again..."

Her voice is thoroughly pained. It's low, angry, and fueled by a betrayal so strong there isn't a string of words elegant enough to describe it.

But there could never be an elegant way to describe this situation, I suppose.

It's betrayal. It's disappointment. It's heartache. It's sin... Simple as that.

There's no coming back from this.

With eyes blurring through tears and my ribs burning through shards of a broken glass heart, I make the only decision I can think of and run for the door.

I only hope I've chosen the right one.

———

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