#my love for edd has definitely made me uncomfortable at times so i understand

[greetingsfromuranus]

Hello. I'll ask you a strange question because I have a similar obsession to eene. This concerns me personally, if anything. I love this cartoon mainly because of Edd and it scares me... I have an obsession that some years, I am trying to stop loving Edd and this cartoon, but everything returns to my roots as soon as I even see something related. This makes me feel more uncomfortable. This has never happened to me, I always stopped loving something at some point and my obsession became weaker. Do you have any advice? Sometimes I regret that I even decided to watch this cartoon.. This cartoon is cool, but it's not worth my obsession. And especially Edd, he’s a simple character who shouldn’t be liked so much, it’s not normal. I seriously want to found a religion for him, it scares me, I have always condemned such dependence, but now I behave the same way.. I’m disgusted with myself.. I became a fanatic, it's disgusting! I try to shift my attention to something else, but everything comes back to EEnE! It sounds funny, but I really suffer from this addiction, maybe I need a specialist :(

I understand how you feel, I know what it's like to be so obsessed with something unattainable that it hurts, but I don't think you should beat yourself up over it! You deserve better! Being ashamed or feeling disgusted with yourself is only going to make it hurt more - so I do think it would be a good idea to accept that part of you, so that you can cope better, and have more energy to put into constructive things :)

From my experience, trying to repress things internally often doesn't work, or can lead to heartbreak, and I don't want you to hurt yourself trying to do that. You shouldnt be ashamed of love! You cant control it, and its not your fault if it's something you dont want! I know being obsessed the way we are can be really really painful, scary, or it feels stupid, or like a waste of time. But chances are, you can't control how long it lasts or how intense it is - so I believe the best course of action is to try and work alongside the obsession to do something constructive or improve yourself.

You can't control the things your brain latches onto, but you can control what you do with them! Like for me, my obsession with Edd helped me finally start cleaning my living space (it was nearly hoarding, you couldn't see the floor most of the time. Ive been like this my whole life.), and helped me get the motivation to really work on improving my art. I'm not sure what skills you personally would like to focus on, but there are many things you could do! For example, you could learn coding & website design by making a website for him, or you could start leaning any sort of craft so you can make art of him!

Now on the other hand, I know how obsessions this strong can make one feel. I know it can feel so intense it's painful or scary, and I know how it hurts when you can't have the object of your love with you irl. There are many times when my obsession with him physically hurt so bad that i just wished it would stop. I know that pain so deeply, and I understand if keeping your obsession isn't worth it to you anymore. I'd seriously reccomend trying out the things I mentioned earlier, but if they don't work, it's important that you use healthy methods to distance yourself from it

One idea I have would be to find some healthy hobbies, like going on walks/hikes, gardening, cycling, cooking etc... better yet, find a club or something to join, just anything else to focus on! I really reccomend outdoor ones, because 1: there really is alot of natural beauty in the world, so many beautiful things to love, and 2: it's easier to distance yourself from the internet, tv, and any other things that would remind you of EEnE. Do something to keep you from getting bored, so your mind doesn't wander too much and go back to the obsession. (I will say, cooking is quite time consuming and takes alot of thinking! It could be a good distraction that's also fun and good for you)

I think your best bet would be to do a combination of both of these! Take energy away from feeling upset at yourself, and instead put it into doing something good for you. I know it can be difficult to start new things like that, but its at least worth a try. There's no guarantee the obsession would stop, but hopefully you may be able to find something to help put you in a better mindset! Once you're feeling better inside, the obsession may not hurt as much, or be as intense, and it will be easier to live with! :) this may be tough, but hopefully you will end up somewhere better in the long run!

You may have to try some different things and think of some more ideas, but if nothing works, it may be a good idea to talk to a professional about it! I'm sure it would be helpful in some way, and I really do hope you can be happier. They would likely have more guidance to give you than I do

Please feel free to ask me for any advice or support, I want you to be able to live happier. I'll be there to talk whenever you need. I care about you!! Please don't beat yourself up over anything, just try to cope as well as you can. Your happiness is most important. I wish you the best of luck in whatever you need to do 💛 and I hope it hurts less in the future

[cherry-dr0p]

I WISH TO RAMBLE!! IM NOT GONNA INCLUDE IMAGES BECAUSE I DONT WANNA BUT HERE WE GO

HUGE TWF4 SPOILERS

I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY!!!

Im not gonna lie, the start kinda had me like "This is what I waited ages for?" But then when the animatronic testing came around, thats when my interest truly started to pick up.

First of all, WHY WOULD YOU TGINK THAT FACIAL RECOGNITION FOR ANIMATRONICS IS A GOOD IDEA??? GENUINELY DID NO ONE HAVE THE COMMON SEMSE TO GO "HM, THIS MAY END NOT GOOD". Like I kind of understand the appeal for it because they may want the kids to feel,, more connected to the animatronics?? I dunno. But like?? I can understand for that time period the desire to have the animatronics interact with the audience (Not saying its a good idea but at least I can understand with this one why they may think it is in my head), but cmon..

Then from what I remember, the sprites came. And Good god did they creep me out slightly when I first saw them, especially Edd and Molly. I dunno, there was something extra creepy in my eyes seeing kids' faces messed up like that. Crazy. I also screamed when I finally saw "Bon" because Ive been keeping up with the Twitter TWF community somewhat, which means I already technically knew about "Bon". It was pretty cool to have him finally introduced in the actual story himself. Also Charles and Susan talking about Felix's addiction and if they should tell Rosemary and Jack(?) is crazy.

Aaaahhh but then the scene with Jack came around. Was rooting for him ngl. I honestly thought he died at the well scene but I dont see any correlation to that quite yet,, mayhaps. Felix almost jumping did make me feel a tiny bit bad for him bit like,, still. Fuck you Felix. I still hate him and 100% think hes getting what hes deserving. He feels guilty? Good. He should.

I cant remember if the Susan scene comes after this or not but I erm uh,,, That was VERY well done!! It gave me chills how you could still hear her breathe. Genuinely. The blood as well and Rocket closing their eyes?? Crazy. The jittery animation drove me insane, it was such an amazing detail that made things far more uncomfortable.

I cant remember where abouts the other Felix scene came but,, HE DOESNT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH ROCKET. I DUNNO,, DO ANYTHING OTHER THAN TAKE IT WITH YOU?? PUT IT IN YOUR HOME OR RESTAURANT?? WHY DID YOU THINK THAT WAS A GOOD IDEA. I SWEAR, MY GUY HAS NEGATIVE BRAINCELLS... But I also think we all know why he's so attached,, him getting haunted by the kids is wild.

The last scene very much makes me think "Bon" is Jack. I unno, very much could be wrong but just the way he talks and is dressed makes me think he is. The fact that he knows so well of what hes talking about and the voice,, maybe the general face shape too. Me thinks its either Brian(Ive saw that theory floating around) or Jack, but Im more leaning towards Jack. It also freaked me out slightly the way Susan came on all deformed too, that was freaky. The voices of all the characters in this new afterlife were very VERY cool too. And the whole mask being given and "Bon" talking about making her "beautiful" too? That was cool. The scene with Edd and Molly debating whether to save Susan too filled my heart with a weird sort of awe. They have a great relationship as siblings together imo, I do very much love their dynamic.

It'd be cool to see the other two episodes for the finale which I think are coming out very soon!! Which is very exciting!! I 100% reccomend TWF4, it's phenomenal and the wait was 200% worth it in my eyes. You can definitely see the developers heart and soul being put into this project, which is very nice to see. In my eyes, you dont see it often. I dunno if I missed out a scene or two from my rant but overall? I adored watching this (Ive already told some of my friends to watch it >:3).

Rant over anyways, buh bye for now :3

[eene-fangirl]

A Day of Ed [An EddEddy Fanfiction]

NOTE: This is a follow up to Double Dee, The Patient! Yes, I am still very obsessed with this story and always will! I hope you enjoy!

Sitting outside on their deck on a fine day in March was bliss to Edd and Eddy. Especially after a rough couple of days. It almost felt as if they were in a different world. The week started off like any regular week where they’d go off to work and then hardly seen one another. So much happened in a short amount of time.

Never having to return to that miserable auto place ever again was the best feeling to Eddy. He instantly felt a heavy weight lift off his chest. But then when it came to telling the news to Maurice the man was both relieved and sad to hear that his favorite work buddy was quitting.

Edd and Eddy sat together in chairs supplied by the owners of the apartment building. Each apartment had two, along with a small table. Two glasses of water were filled to the top. They needed to stay hydrated.

Summer was beautiful here. With the way the sun relaxed over the houses when it set. They only ate out on deck once which was when they first moved in last May. It was close to the city, big enough, and was also cheap. A plus, Eddy marveled over.

The young couples pose could have been a cute portrait. Edd had his feet raised up on a stool and a brown soft blanket covered him for warmth. The man was still weak and achy from his battle with the flu. His cheeks looked much healthier at least. Eddy could hardly look at him without his heart breaking when he was as pale as a ghost.

Edd definitely made a recovery back from the dead for sure. He still complained about his back however. The diagnosis, from Edd, was that he must have strained his back after his many trips to the bathroom.

Just then the neighbor from the apartment on the end came out. The woman was wearing a coat and her son, who must have been around four, was flying his toy plane around.

“Hi Mr. and Mr. McGee!” The little boy cheerfully greeted, waving. His mother grabbed his hand and she uncomfortably eyed the two gentlemen as they walked passed. “Are you feeling better?” he asked Edd.

“Much better, thank you. I’m still recovering.”

The woman flinched and immediately disappeared down the stairs before another word.

“What crawled up her ass?” Eddy asked taking a sip of water once she was out of earshot.

“Eddy!” Edd scolded lightly tapping his arm. He was still weak from being ill. Eddy still had to support him whenever he walked. Hopefully he’d be up for a little adventure tomorrow.

Eddy held Edd’s hand and smiled over at the man. Edd sighed. His lips curled up, smiling. Eddy’s loving smiles were so contagious. Speaking of which…

“I’m surprised you never contracted the flu, Eddy.”

Eddy giggled. “Oh, you know. Guess I got super powers!” He laughed, not able to help himself. Edd gingerly laughed at Eddy’s humor. His hands were still gently placed against his stomach. Yes, it was better, but Edd still aches all over. He didn’t have much strength to talk, either.

“The flu is very contagious. I worry about everyone in our apartment complex. Once one episode happens it’s sure to travel.”

“Are we gonna move if there’s an epidemic?” Eddy joked.

Edd looked out at the scenery watching passing cars and occasional passerbys. The downstairs neighbors dog roamed the yard tied to its leash. And then he witnessed another young couple kissing each other goodbye in the shared driveway. Each person who lived here had a story. They were all unique.

“I like it here, Eddy,” Edd said in a whisper. He felt that he may ruin the mood if he spoke too loudly.

“Yeah. Me too,” Eddy also said, quietly.

Edd turned, surprised. “Do you really?”

“Yeah. Why?”

“Nothing. It’s just that I thought you were unhappy,” Edd admitted, clearly sounding nervous.

“‘Cause I never get to spend time here,” Eddy explained. He adjusted himself so he could look into Edd’s green eyes. Edd stared lovingly into his blue eyes. Just then a realization came to Eddy. “We’ve been married for only ten months, sockhead.”

Edd blinked, also surprised. “Has it really?”

“Yeah. It feels so much longer doesn’t it. I only proposed at the beginning of the year! Can you believe that!” Eddy was so excited that he was jostling Edd’s arm, disturbing him. “Sorry,” he apologised.

“It feels as though we've been married our whole lives,” Edd said.

“Yeah, we have been arguing like a married could since we first met,” Eddy teased. They both smiled over the content memory until their happiness instantly faded precisely at the same time.

“Then once you started working at the school we hardly saw each other.”

Edd frowned. “I know. There were days I was home by three and then I’d spend hours, sometimes even midnight for you to return home.”

Dread and guilt covered Eddy's face. He avoided looking at Edd much to the others worry. His head drooped, and he shook it around, angrily.  “Can’t believe I put up with that crap.”

“Oh, Eddy please don’t get yourself down.”

“I could have left so many freakin’ times!” Eddy raised his voice, in frustration. “But I kept holding myself back thinkin’ I couldn’t do anything,” he sighed letting his head dip again. “Why does anxiety have to do that?”

Edd struggled to push himself up only to feel some discomfort in her lower back. Eddy noticed. Instead he made it easier and moved closer to the frail man. Edd weakly smiled, thankful, and reached out to touch Eddy’s cheek.

“How have you been, Eddy?”

That question really hit home. Eddy had been avoiding his feelings, too long. The more time he spent holding himself up at work his dream of wanting to become a psychologist drifted day after day until it felt hopeless.

On the days where they were free they’d go out with Ed and May. Eddy worked overtime just to make his stupid boss happy. And to earn more money. For himself? Or them?

His boss tore him apart for a decade. The man reminded Eddy of his brother. Manipulative. The only reason Eddy stayed was for the good pay and Maurice. He made it worth going into that nightmare.

Maurice was such a kind man. Now that Eddy realized it he confided in him more then his own husband. No wonder Maurice told him to spend more time with Edd. Maurice never had it easy either. To think the man used to have a drinking problem and had to spend some time in jail. Now he was completely sober, married to his wife for fifteen years now, raising three kids and even caring to his ailing parents. How did the man have time for anything?

“Better now that I’ve quit that hellhole,” Eddy answered with all the weight inside his body finally letting loose.

Edd smiled. “Me too.”

“And you love your job, right?”

Edd’s face immediately brightened. “Yes, Eddy!” Edd responded, happily. “My students, the other faculty, and my boss have made it a wonderful start! I’m looking forward to the next few years working there.”

“I’m glad you are,” Eddy smiled holding his hand tighter. Leaning into Edd’s touch he noticed that his husband’s hand was cold. Gently, he held both of his hands in order to warm them up.

A couple days ago the weather was so fine. The sun was shining, there was a slight breeze, and it smelled like spring. It was still warm today, but also more of a chilly breeze. Edd wasn’t complaining though. They had to spend so much time inside when working.

Looking over Edd’s features he still looked exhausted. Even with going to bed very early, didn’t help. It was tough to see Edd like this. Then he yawned. His head sank into the chair more looking up at Eddy with an almost forced smile.

“You feelin’ okay?” Eddy asked.

Edd hesitated. “I guess a part of me is still tired. It does take some time to recover from the flu.”

Noticing his grip on his arm tighten Edd glanced over at Eddy who was so pale in the face that he looked as if had taken ill.

“Eddy, is something the matter? Have you become ill?” Edd asked reaching over to try and touch his cheek.

“You looked dead every single time you fell asleep,” Eddy’s voice completely broke that it also hitched in his throat. Was Eddy going to cry? He had a bad habit of holding back. “I felt like I had no idea what I was doing some of the time. I actually needed advice from my mother to help me get through this! A-And then when you started choking… I…”

Eddy covered his eyes. He took a long deep breath in through his nostrils and heaved a big sigh. Edd could just feel all the stress and worry being released from inside his body. It was a similar feeling he always felt when Eddy was sick.

“Please, forgive me, Eddy…”

“You’ve said that a thousand times already, sockhead! You couldn’t help it.”

“I know,” Edd looked ashamed once more. “I don’t understand why I even went into work on Wednesday.”

“And if Douchestien wasn’t talkin’ my ear off I would never have let you leave the house!” Eddy said, avoiding his gaze.

“Don’t blame yourself, Eddy. It’s more my fault. I should have said something.”

They were quiet for a short time. Eddy sat back into his chair and relaxed again.

“You know, I think it’s best that I take some time off before going to that school,” Eddy held Edd’s hand even tighter. “I’ve missed yah.”

This time Edd’s lips quivered. “Oh, I’m so glad to hear that, Eddy. I was worrying since you didn’t return home until after midnight some nights that you were… seeing someone else.”

Eddy heart completely ripped apart. “No! Don’t you ever think that! You’re the only one, Edd! You’re my sockhead. All those nights Bragstien made us work overtime I was thinkin’ and worrying about how you’re here alone. And then I also thought how happy you are. And how in hell you ended up with a guy like me. All those people, your boss and the secretary, they were so happy to actually meet me. So, clearly I’m doin’ something right.”

“You took care of me.”

“And you told me to quit.”

“You proposed.”

“And you agreed.”

Remembering that day in May of last year when the priest recited their vows reminding how they’d be together for better or for worse, until death do they part. Forever never sounded so meaningful until Eddy slipped the ring on Edd’s finger.

“I love you, Eddy.”

“Love you, too.”

They remained quiet as they continued to sit on the porch holding hands.

[eenefangirlanalysis]

Ed decides that he’s had enough, it’s time to sleep, and drops his friends.

Literally Matt Hill’s delivery is the best, “Ed pooped. Sleepy time, guys.”

Ed’s speech goes back and forth from a toddler and back to how a child his age would speak.

Ed deserves a break for sure. He tends to put others needs before himself.

How does Ed feel about himself? Sure, he’s always laughing and smiling but I don’t think we’ve ever been given an episode about how he feels about himself. He’s insecure. He’s unsure. And nobody understands him. Edd and Eddy don’t understand him. They won’t let him take charge and automatically think that he will mess things up. This lead to the downfall in their friendship. Trust is the #1 key to any friendship.

His friends don’t give him the right amount of credit. Edd practically ignores him while Eddy uses his strong abilities or his creativity to get back at an enemy. A certain scene which I will get into in a bit would have made Edd and Eddy see Ed in a new light.

Unfortunately cartoon physics don’t hold Edd and Eddy in the air as they go crashing to the ground.

Poor, Edd. He landed on his coccyx. That was my favorite line ever from Boo Haw Haw.

The slapstick doesn’t end there. The writers have to complete it with the stick hitting both Edd and Eddy on the head. Can they catch a break already? Eddy always gets abused from slapstick violence. Didn’t he already go through the worst pain he could ever imagine?

As for Edd he already received an injury on his head. His head gets hurt the most. Look at him grasp it in pain. Again, we’re going to find out in a few minutes about his secret.

Poor Eddy.

Emitting the final yawn of the scene we’ve all caught the yawns and are yawning. It’s definitely sleepy time.

This is one of my favorite eene locations.

It has a Hawaiian tone to it. The palm trees, Easter island heads, and rocks. It has a calming atmosphere. It’s a totally private area for the boys to bond. 

Do you think this area is meant to be a camp site? It a has a wire fence surrounding it. I have theory that since this little rest area is near that motel the Eds walked passed it could be a camp site or a place to look over the city.

All the city lights are out. That’s strange.

Do you think the Eds ever see the city since that rock wall is obstructing their view? They must know.

Ed tunnels through the ground as if he were a gopher [like Jonny in Take This Ed and Shove it] and searches around to find a place to sleep.

You gotta love Ed.

“Ah, comfy.”

Ed immediately settles in with nature. Edd is not used to it even though he admires nature. He’s never slept outside before. I’m not going to count camping because technically you’re inside a tent. The boys are roughing it.

The instant Edd walks off screen carrying the glowing fireflies Eddy immediately grows uncomfortable.

He fears the dark.

It’s never been outright stated and it doesn’t have to be. Eddy’s reactions sell it.

The first time his fear of the dark came about was To Sir With Ed. Technically he was afraid of being home alone but he’s also uncomfortable with the dark. He’s embarrassed. Eddy doesn’t want to show that weakness to anybody fearing they’ll look at him in a different way. Eddy wants to look like the most confident person in the whole world when in all actuality he’s insecure about himself and fears what the world has to offer.

Here’s my head canon on why Eddy fears the dark along with being alone.

In my fanfiction story, The Bloody Nose, Bro gave Eddy a nose bleed when he was five years old and left him home alone in the dark until their parents arrived home. This event forever traumatized event and also explains why he has trust issues. Eddy’s parents made sure that one of them needed to be home at all times once they found out about the abuse. A miscommunication happened one night.

I love seeing genuine moments of the real Eddy. From the way he acts at the end of the movie he’s so cheery and goofy.

Also, look at Eddy in one of his final attempts to sport the Bro chin.

“Eddy, can I have a goodnight kiss?”

Eddy is disgusted by the request and immediately takes off dragging Ed with him.

Has Ed ever received a good night kiss?

As Eddy decides to make this Easter island head his bed for the night Edd comes through and attaches a label to the rock.

Okay, I was just reminded of ‘Eddy’s king of the castle’ song from Know it All Ed.

“‘Yet another boulder.’“

I’m surprised Edd doesn’t call it an Easter island head.

Edd has been busy labeling the whole area.

“Hey, sockhead! Quit turning everything into your bedroom!”

Off topic question: Does Eddy call Edd ‘Double Dee’ or ‘Sockhead’ the most?

“It’s just that it’s difficult for me to sleep in an unlabeled environment.”

Reeaaally, Edd.

You slept just fine in a tent in Hot Buttered Ed. And when you slept in Ed’s basement in A Glass of Warm Ed. Although I do see his point. He was in an area he was familiar with. This is the first time he is sleeping out in the wilderness.

Edd was the first character we were ever introduced to. And in his first appearance he was labeling his room. Odd time to do it but it makes you wonder why he started then. As I have pointed out I believe Edd was home schooled until fourth grade. The summer that takes place from season 1-4 must be the first time the Eds are hanging out with one another. Everything is changing for Edd. After spending years practically held prisoner in his room he starts hanging out with his friends and actually witnessing what the real world is like. 

I also believe that Edd’s mental state has worsened over time. Simialir to how Eddy wants to look like a confident person Edd wants his outer mask to resemble someone who has it all together. Edd is the biggest neat freak you could ever meet. But, is his mind that way too?

“Snore. I’m gettin’ some shut eye.”

If this were Eddy before the fight he would have said something to make fun of Edd or express his annoyance.

Eddy knows when to stop. He has self control. He grew up from the fight. If they didn’t end up finding Bro would Eddy have changed? The fight was enough to show Eddy that it was wrong for him to act like someone he never wanted to be.

 If the series ended at Fistful of Ed it still would have ended Eddy’s character perfectly. He’s a kid who’s gone through a rough time. Without the movie it can be implied that there was something off about his relationship with his brother. 

I LOVE Big Picture Show, don’t get me wrong. There are so many what if scenarios.

“Aw, this beds killin’ me,” Eddy moans as we hear his back crack.

Ed suggests that they trade ‘beds’.

Eddy’s reply; “Quit talkin’ in your sleep, Ed.”

He even turns his back on Ed. Wow, this one little exchange says so much. Eddy is uncomfortable but doesn’t want his friend to feel the way he does. Eddy mentally punishes himself. He’s had occasions where he whacks himself against the head. Eddy does not like himself.

And the scene dissolves.

Okay, time to talk about the famous deleted confession scene.

The Eds were supposed to gather around the fireflies campfire and all confess to a secret. It was supposed to get very deep and personal.

Ed’s confession was that he felt Edd and Eddy only hung out with him because of his name. He’s always felt left out as his friends got more of the limelight and hung out with him less. This is why fans dislike EddEddy. They feel Ed will be left out. Edd and Eddy will never forget about Ed as he is the one who keeps his friends together. Ed has done so much for his friends even putting them first before himself.

Edd and Eddy would have had a new viewpoint on Ed. Especially, Edd. Edd didn’t believe that Ed had a chance at winning the spelling bee in Too Smart for His Own Ed. Ed does understand. He has his own unique way of thinking and looking at the world. Edd and Eddy have both taken advantage of his disability thinking that he won’t understand.

Edd’s confession would have revealed what he was hiding under his hat. Along with the dodge ball incident. In Edd’s old elementary school he was mercilessly picked on by the other kids. Mainly in gym whenever they played dodge ball. After too many hits to the head Edd decided to get revenge. So, he built some sort of dodge ball cannon which went out of control hurting all his fellow classmates. Edd didn’t mean for his revenge to go this far. Mt head canon is that his dodge ball machine malfunctioned shooting a ball from the oposite end, struck Edd making him slam into the wall practically cracking his head open.

Edd is hiding a scar.

Edd’s backstory is so sad and would have given us more insight one why he was so upset about the incidents in Fistful of Ed. And it would have explained the cold relationship he has with his parents. 

He and his parents moved from Lemon Brooke to Peach Creak after the incident fearing they’d never get their reputation back.

He’s afraid of himself. He fears that if his past gets out everyone will fear him. Maybe that’s why he avoids the in crowd. The in crowd always knows everything and are constantly passing around rumors.

Ed and Eddy would have understood Edd and accepted him.

I know we have all been waiting to find out what would have been under Edd’s hat but would it have been necessary?

The only story that has a resolution is Eddy. We don’t know what will happen to Ed and Edd’s home lives.

As for Eddy’s confession he was only going to sprout out more lies about his brother. He was either fearful of what his friends were going to say or he was still in denial. My guess is both. He’s already lied to his friends enough and he dragged them out into unknown territory.

The confession scene was cut for time. 

If this scene were added it would have given the film a whole new meaning. The Eds would have had a better understanding for one another. This is a coming of age story. The Eds have been mentally lost from themselves and one another. It would have been a chance to reconnect creating a much stronger friendship then what they had in the beginning.

Still, even though we don’t physically see the scene it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen off screen.

And then the scene would have ended with Ed offering expired gravy to his friends causing them all to pass out and experience a clay animated nightmare.

What is your opinion? Would you have liked to see this deleted scene?

[eddsworldshippinghell]

Forgive and Forget Ch6

[Ch1][Ch2][Ch3][Ch4][Ch5] [Peru Fic]

Okay so, it took a zillion years but here it finally is! I hope some people are still interested in reading this after I took so long to update. Let me know what you think!

Warning: Graphic descriptions of murder are sprinkled throughout this chapter.

“This is a substandard trap.” Paul mutters as they all creep down the hall, guns at the ready. Patryk makes a half-hearted noise of agreement, but Tord shakes his head.

“No,” He mumbles. “He's planning something. He's fucking with us.”

“Do you think Tom and Matt are okay?” Patryk asks gently, and Tord grits his teeth and squeezes his gun tighter almost subconsciously.

“They'd better be.”

As they creep through the darkened hallways his mind wanders, and he wonders again what his boyfriends will say when he sees them. When Edd isn't with them. He grimaces, chest aching, but he determinedly pushes his anguish to the back of his mind so he can focus on getting Tom and Matt back; that's the important thing. He knows if Edd was here he’d want nothing more than to have them back in his arms, and Tord shares the sentiment.

If they want to touch him, that is.

His chest twists.

Will they blame him? It would be fair; he blames himself.

He stops suddenly, and his partners stop within the same second, poised ready for attack in case their leader has spotted or heard something that they have not.

“Down this hall,” He begins, and if they notice the tremor in his voice they don't react. He appreciates it. “We’re going to come to a door. That door will open into a small hallway, which if you recall is one of the hallways that has holes in the ceiling for easier ambush.”

“You think an ambush will be waiting?” Paul asks, and Tord hesitates.

“I want to separate.” He says, and both immediately leap to protest. He lifts his hand to signal he wasn't done, and they reluctantly fall silent. “A little back up this hall is a door that'll take you up a staircase and right to the hallway that's overtop that room.”

“You want us to go and kill anyone waiting to kill us.” Paul guesses, and Tord nods his head.

“I'll continue through there and into the dungeon. You guys can come down through the ceiling and follow when you're done.”

Paul grimaces, clearly unhappy with the idea of splitting up, but eventually he nods.

“Okay.” He turns back toward the door, and Patryk reluctantly follows.

As soon as they start walking away, Tord feels sick and regrets his choice; he can't help them stay alive if they separate.

“Hey-” He begins, faltering slightly, and Patryk turns to smile over his shoulder.

“We’ll see you soon, Red Leader.” He says softly, and then they disappear around the corner.

----------

Tord hesitates outside the door to the dungeons, unsure what is waiting for him inside. Paul and Patryk still had yet to reunite with him, and to say he's worried would be an understatement.

His hand reaches slowly toward the doorknob, other hand holding his weapon at the ready in case of an ambush. He can’t wait any longer; every second he waits is another moment that Tom or Matt could be killed. Steeling himself he takes a deep breath, twists the knob, and shoves the door open. The hallway is empty.

“Definitely a trap.” He mutters, slowly creeping forward and closing the door behind himself.

“Did you hear that?” A voice asks timidly down the hall, and Tord’s heart leaps into his throat.

“Shh.” Comes a second voice, and he breaks into a sprint.

It’s stupid and unsafe, and it immediately gives his position away to any potential threats, but when he hears their voices he doesn’t care. He needs to see them right away.

“Tom!” He cries raggedly, “Matt!” He yanks the deadbolt aside and throws the door leading to their cell open and they’re immediately scrambling to their feet.

He crashes painfully into the bars, arms reaching desperately through the openings, and tears are welling in his eyes before they even touch him. They both crash into the bars and their arms fling through the bars, clutching at his hoodie, pleased sobs escaping them.

“Oh god- Tord I’m so happy to see you.” Matt blubbers, trembling lips pressing shaky kisses to Tord’s cheek through the bars, and Tord feels dizzy with relief.

Oh god, they’re alive. They’re here. They’re okay. He made it in time, and they love him. For the first time in days, Tord feels happy for a moment.

And then the moment ends.

“Hey, where’s Edd?” It’s Tom that asks, and Tord goes rigid.

“Oh- Uh-” He withdraws when he feels his hands shaking, and he feels dizzy as he steps back. “I- We should get you guys out of there!”

He forces a laugh and whirls around, briskly walking away to search for the keys to the cell. Tom and Matt follow along slowly as far as their cell stretches, and when he turns around to ask them if they have an idea he feels as if his heart has been ripped out anew.

“Tord..” Matt says weakly, and he can see in their eyes that they know the answer to what Matt is about to ask. “Where is Edd?”

“I- I-” He stutters. He takes a step toward them, legs shaking, and he manages another step before his body refuses to move forward any further. His hands come up and he pushes his fists into his face, stifling a sob, and his shoulders shake when he takes a breath. “I-” He tries again, but he can’t make himself say it.

“Tord?” Tom asks gently, and Tord knows this time its concern for him and not Edd. The thought makes him feel even sicker.

“Please don’t make me say it.” He breathes shakily. “I- I can’t.”

He hears Matt’s horrified gasp and his legs give out, sending him to his knees. He hears feet running across the cold stone floor, and then Matt is crouching as close to Tord as he can.

“Tell me it’s not true.” He begs, and a sob escapes Tord.

“I’m sorry.”

“No.” Matt breathes, “No! You’re wrong!” But he knows Tord isn’t lying; he can see the utter anguish upon the Norwegian’s face. “Tom-” He turns, and Tom is frozen.

He can’t bring himself to move, his heart feels as though it’s been violently ripped from his chest and his stomach is in knots. A split second later, he’s falling. Matt is the only thing that stops him from hitting the ground, and he’s cradled to the redheads chest as he weeps. Tom blinks, waiting for tears.

But they don’t come. He just feels numb.

He wants to blame Tord. Wants to scream and yell, and tell Tord that it’s all his fault. But he doesn’t, because he knows deep down that it isn’t. He knows that Tord loved Edd and would’ve done anything in his power to save him. And he knows Tord needs them right now.

He sits up, gaze locking on Tord.

“Get the keys.” He says, and Tord looks up for the first time since he had fallen, eyes red rimmed from crying. “They’re usually hung on the other side of the deadbolted door.”

Tord holds his gaze for a moment longer before weakly getting to his feet and approaching the door. He steps through it once more and sure enough the keys are hanging where Tom had said. He grabs them, and within moments the cell is unlocked.

He steps back, and the keys fall to the floor.

“I understand if you hate me.” He says, voice barely a whisper. “I’d hate me too-” He breaks off when Tom firmly embraces him, arms winding tightly around Tord and pulling the Norwegian firmly against his body.

“It’s not your fault.” He says, and Tord goes rigid in his arms once more. “You did everything you could.”

“I-” He falters, more tears welling in his eyes, “I should have done more!”

“It isn’t your fault.” Matt whispers from behind him, and Tord has to struggle against sobs. “We don’t blame you.”

Tord starts sobbing. He starts and he can’t stop, chest heaving as Matt’s arms envelope him as well, and he trembles in their arms.

“It’s my fault!” He wails, “It’s my fault Stephan came after you all in the first place- it’s my fault Edd is dead!”

“Shh, Tord, no it’s not. You loved him.”

“The only thing you’re guilty of is loving Edd. This is just a horrible accident.”

Tord tries to choke back a sob but ultimately fails, and Matt can't contain himself anymore, pushing his face into Tord’s back as sobs wrack his thin frame.

-----------

“Did you come alone?” Tom asks softly as they creep down the hallway, one of his hands gripping the back of Tords hoodie, the other holding Matt’s hand.

“No, I had Paul and Patryk with me.” He admits. “They insisted they must come and help me rescue the two of you.”

“So.. Where are they?” Matt whispers, and Tord feels his stomach twist because he has no clue where his friends are.

“I don't know.” He admits.

The two behind him share a worried glance.

“What's the plan for getting out of here?” Tom asks after an uncomfortable few minutes of silence.

“I don't have one.” He sighs softly. “I.. honestly thought by the time I found you, you two would be..” He trails off, but the two of them understand.

Dead.

“Oh.” Matt whispers.

“What has he been doing to you?” Tord asks, and the two of them share a look once more.

“We’ll tell you when we’re home, okay?” Tom offers. “Here isn't the best place to talk about it.”

Tord glances over his shoulder at them, meeting each of their gazes for a moment, before he nods his head in acceptance of their words.

“Okay.” He says. “Home.”

He can't deny the relief he feels at the word. The relief he feels that they don't hate him, and they still want him to come home with them. To be with them. He's still theirs. His heart aches at the thought, desperately missing Edd.

He shakes his head, gun lifting when he hears footsteps. Tom and Matt immediately shrink behind their boyfriend and he growls protectively. The person that rounds the corner is Patryk, cheeks stained with tears as he frantically runs toward Tord.

“Tord!” He whispers hoarsely, and Tord drops his weapon and immediately takes off toward him, sweater pulling free of Tom’s hand. Their bodies crash together only a few feet from Tom and Matt, and Patryk clings to him while he struggles to control his breathing.

Tom and Matt quickly shuffle over, Tom’s hand reclaiming its spot on Tord’s hoodie, and Tord gently pats his soldiers back.

“What's wrong?” He asks, and Patryk stifles another noise of anguish.

“They got Paul.”

-------

“I don't know what you want me to do, Patryk-”

“If we leave him here he’ll be killed!”

“If I take them up there so will they!” He cries, gesturing frantically to his two boyfriends. His hands are trembling and he's /petrified/ of losing one of his best friends, petrified of putting Tom and Matt at risk again.

Maybe Tom could fight, but Matt was a lover, not a fighter, and Tord /knows/ Tom will be more focused on keeping Matt safe than the task at hand.

“Paul is your friend.” He insists, and Tord’s hands lift and fist into his hair, tugging as he lets out a strangled noise.

“I /know/ Patryk, but think about what you're asking me to do! The whole reason we came here in the first place was to get these two back home. I can't jeopardize that. I can't risk their safety. I already lost Edd, I can't lose them. You're asking me to risk everything I have and I-”

Patryk falters and looks away.

“We risked everything to help you.” He whispers.

Tord's chest twists.

--------

“I didn't want you guys to see me like this,” Tord whispers as Tom and Matt follow along behind them. “If I had my way, you wouldn't.”

Before they can question him he slips through a door, and they hear a crack and the sound of a limp body hitting the floor.

“It's safe.” He calls softly, and they timidly creep through the door, Patryk bringing up the rear, all three of them determinedly avoiding looking at the dead man on the floor.

The group is silent, all refusing to make conversation in case Tord needs to hear someone coming up to them. The walk is mostly uninterrupted again, which leaves Tord feeling uneasy. Eventually he opens a door housing approximately 10 guards in it, including one standing right in front of him, with his back to the door. He jumps onto the taller man's back and wraps his arm around his throat, kicking his leg out to kick the gun from the man's hand. The man's fingers claw at his arm, and Tord shifts and snaps the man's neck in an instantaneous movement. When the body falls he goes with it, finally catching the attention of the other guards.

He grabs the gun and fires, taking three down. He grimaces as the others come running, screaming to each other to disarm him and then take the hostages back. He sees red.

He crouches, body tensed, and he leaps up, tackling one to the floor. He quickly puts a bullet through his head, screaming when he feels the flesh of his arm ripping. He growls, and reaches into the dead man's utility belt, tearing a knife free and whirling, stabbing it into the leg of the man closest. The man shrieks, subconsciously bending over, and Tord rips the blade free and stabs it up through the man's jaw, killing him with little more than a choked gurgle from the man.

The other man grabs Tord from behind, lifting him off the floor, and Tord power drives his elbow back into the man's stomach. The force of impact earns a choked cry, stomach rupturing from the impact, and Tord is dropped unceremoniously to the ground as the man keels over.

He's quick to shoot the remaining guards between the eyes, chest heaving as the gun falls from between trembling fingers, pose imposing and threatening as he glowers down at the man slowly bleeding to death at his feet.

“Hvor er han?” He snarls, and the man flinches away.

“Jeg vet ikke! Jeg er bare en soldat!”

Tord bares his teeth in a grimace and lifts his foot, slamming it down on the man's throat, muffling his choked shriek. He then turns and faces his boyfriends, regret seeping into his brain at the looks of fear upon their faces.

“Tom- Matt-” He begins, breaking off when both rush forward and throw their arms around him.

“We thought you were a goner.” Matt mumbles.

---------

They creep through the halls for what feels like hours -and very well might be- before coming upon a room with guards once more. This one is different than the last, however, as they can hear screaming voices through the door.

“Go to hell!” A familiar voice shrieks, and without a beat of hesitation Patryk is tearing forward.

Before Tord can manage to stop him the door is kicked down, and he has no choice but to fight. The room contains 4 heavily armed guards, and Paul is strapped to a table in the middle of the room, blood welling on his chest from his wounds.

The guards start toward them and Tord runs forward, catching a man's arm as he raises his gun. He jerks it down as the trigger is pulled, bullets firing harmlessly into the ground, and his fist flies forward into the man's face. The man snarls and flings his fist forward, and Tord catches it and twists it behind the man's back, kicking his leg out and sending him to his knees. The man screams, and the noise is choked off when Tord snaps his neck.

He goes rigid when he hears more gunfire and whirls, but the remaining guards drop limply to the ground revealing an unharmed Patryk holding the weapon that had fired. They maintain eye contact for a fraction of a second, and then Patryk is running frantically toward Paul. Tord takes a step toward him, but falters when he hears a grinding noise. He turns his head, and as he does a warning light on the wall begins flashing, bathing the room in red light as metal barriers begin lowering from the ceiling.

Panic clutches him and he glances to Tom and Matt, and then to Paul- he can't save them all, if they're trapped in here they're dead. He barely stops himself from puking and instead shrieks an order.

“Run!”

The sheer terror in his voice is enough to drive Matt and Tom toward the exit, and Tord takes off to Paul's side and starts tugging aggressively to free his friend, fingers clawing at the metal bindings.

“Patryk!” He says frantically, shooting a glance toward his boyfriends. “Patryk hurry!”

“Tord!” Comes a frantic shriek, and his heart plummets into his stomach when he sees the doors have nearly closed.

He glances back as one of Paul's wrists is freed, and he loops his fingers through and leaps up so his feet are braced on the side of the table and pulls with all of his might. The metal snaps and he flies to the floor.

“Go! Go go!” He roars as he pulls himself off the floor and tears across the room.

His fingers close around the base of the rapidly descending door and for once he doesn't concern himself with keeping his secret, and instead concentrates on lifting the door.

“Go- go go-” He commands through gritted teeth, and Patryk obediently pushes Paul through the small gap and rolls under right after.

Tord groans in pain, fingers slipping, and he screeches in pain when a bullet tears through his flesh. The pain makes his fingers release, and the door plummets to the ground, sealing himself from his boyfriends.

He can hear Tom and Matt shrieking his name frantically, but he trusts Patryk and Paul to take care of them and instead turns to see who had shot him. He growls at the guard in the opposite doorway, and he can hear other ones rushing toward them.

---------

“Come on.” Patryk orders, helping Paul stay on his feet as he rapidly begins making his way away from the room. Tom and Matt don't budge, and he turns to flower at them. “/Come on/.” He snarls.

“We can't leave without him!” Matt cries, and Paul shakes his head.

“Tord will be fine. We have to go, or we’ll be killed and all of this will be for naught. We’ll meet up with him again.”

The two share a look and then nod, immediately scurrying after true soldiers and hoping to god they're right.

--------

“Hei, gamle venner. Jeg er sikker på at du husker meg, så du vet at samarbeidet er nøkkelen til din overlevelse.” Tord says coldly into the microphone, voice echoing through the entire base. “Manglende å fortelle meg hva jeg vil, vil resultere i din død. Jeg vil ha Stephan. Du vil enten overgi ham til meg, eller du vil dø alle.”

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Matt asks nervously, peeking for what must be the hundredth time out of the window of the guard tower they found themselves in.

“I want him to pay.” Tord growls, and Tom nods in agreement.

“We’re not going the noble route. We have to make Stephan pay for what he did.”

“I want revenge as much as the next guy, but it'll be a little hard to get it if we’re dead!” Matt defends. “We don't even know where Paul and Patryk are!”

“They'll be coming now.” Tord replies. “If they're still alive they'll know where we are and they'll come.”

“And if they don't?” Tom asks, and the Norwegian grits his teeth.

“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.”

---------

In retrospect, Tord would acknowledge that perhaps he should have just taken his boyfriends to safety before pursuing Stephan; he had never wanted them to see this side of him- the side of him that murders whoever stands in his way.

He shakes his head. That's not who he is. Stephan had killed Edd, and he was going to get even. This is all self defence, he tells himself, we don't murder innocents. If anyone surrenders they can leave.

He takes a deep breath, glances behind him to make sure that Tom and Matt are still there, and then stands to leap over the wall.

“I heard you're looking for me.” A voice coos sweetly, and before Tord can react there's a knife against his throat.

He can barely hear Tom and Matt shrieking over the laughter in his ear, and he curses and spits and struggles to no avail. Stephan chuckles lowly in his throat and forces Tord to walk forward, and the Norwegian can feel beads of blood welling up at the pressure upon his throat, leaving him no choice but to cooperate; without him alive, Tom and Matt are alone.

“You know,” He begins as his men walk over and attach chains to Tord’s wrists. He pushes him to his knees and the chains are pulled behind his back and attached to his ankles, leaving him immobile. A glance to the side shows Tom and Matt in the same situation.

“If you had just surrendered, I would have let them live.” He strolls away and strokes his finger down Matt’s jaw. “If you hadn't been such a pain in my fucking neck, I wouldn't have had to snap Edd’s.”

Tord goes rigid and a hushed noise of anguish escapes Matt, and Stephan’s delighted laughter rings through the clearing. He returns to Tord, stopping in front of him and smirking.

“It was so easy, too. Like.. snapping a popsicle in half.” He leans down and tilts his head, tone as if he was talking to a toddler. “It's amazing how easily you can snap someone's neck. Just a little-” He trails off as his hand repeats the motion he had used to snap Edd’s, and he practically roars with laughter at the look on Tord’s face. “Snap.” He coos. “And there he goes.”

Tord practically shrieks and rears up, one hand managing to rip free, and he slams it full force into Stephan’s face. The man stumbles back, and Tord’s hand flies to the remaining chains binding him, tearing them apart and getting to his feet. By this time Stephan has recovered from the shock and is laughing again.

“Do you remember it, Tord?” He taunts. “The sound he made when I snapped his neck? The way he hit the ground? The way he used his last words to say he loves you?”

“Shut up!” He shrieks, lunging at the other man.

Rage and grief blinds him as the feeling of overwhelming guilt resurfaces, and he throws his fists into Stephan’s face as fast as he can. Stephan only laughs beneath him, laughing harder at Tord’s sob of misery.

“It could have been easy.” He growls, and in his grief stricken state Tord doesn't react fast enough to avoid Stephan’s hand. It grasps his throat, and in a swift movement Tord is thrown to the floor, Stephan's boot pressing down on the back of his neck. “But now that you've really pissed me off, I'm going to make you watch them die before I kill you.”

Tord goes rigid,and Stephan lifts his boot. Before he can react, the guards swarm him and pull him off the ground, holding him tightly with no hope of tearing free. Stephan smirks, and makes his way over to Tord’s boyfriends. Matt is softly weeping to himself, and tear streaks are evident on Tom’s cheeks as he tries to lean himself against Matt to comfort the redhead.

“Now.. which one of you should I kill?” He asks himself, smirking cruelly down at them. The men carry Tord over to them, coming to a stop next to Tom, and Stephan looks toward him. “Who do you think?”

“Me!” He tries frantically. “Kill me- please don't hurt them!”

Stephan snorts and makes a harsh buzzing noise in the back of his throat, and then pretends to ponder to himself.

“Me- kill me just- don't hurt him!” Tom tries when Stephan’s hand reaches toward Matt. “Please!”

Stephan hesitates and draws his hand back. Matt squeaks and pushes closer to Tom, and Tord screams and struggles in his hold.

“Hmmmmm…. no.”

In a swift movement that neither of them properly register, Stephan swoops and grabs Matt's chains, tearing him away from Tom and over toward a large man standing by with a gun in his hands.

Tord goes white.

"No!" Tord’s voice is a shrill screech, blood running cold as he drags Matt away from them. Tears are welling in Matt's eyes, face white with fear, and Tom is screaming bloody murder next to Tord. "Matt no!" Tord wails, panic clutching his chest, heart twisting. "No- no please- Stephan please I can't lose him too- I'll do anything don't hurt him!" Tears flow in torrents down his cheeks and his throat throbs in pain, and Matt is trying to smile at his boyfriends, and Tom is writhing and spitting, toppled over onto his side and flailing his arms, kicking his legs out in a futile struggle to get free. "Matt!" He roars in protest, and Matt's eyes slip shut. "I love you both." He says, and the resignation in his tone is enough to make Tord retch, entire body heaving forward as it tries to expel the nonexistent contents of his stomach.

[cartoonessays]

Johnny Bravo and the Pitfalls of Satire

One of my earliest blog posts was an essay defending Johnny Bravo from a feminist perspective.  In my defense of it, I mentioned in passing that one of the ways that the series still falls short of truly being a feminist show was that it potentially diminishes how detestable his behavior towards women is.

This post is partially a response to that one.  I grossly undercut how pernicious the show’s treatment of Johnny’s behavior towards women is.

One thing that is important to point out is that Johnny Bravo was a show that was created by and mostly if not entirely written and directed by men.  From the top of my head, the biggest names I can think of that been attached to the show are Van Partible, Butch Hartman, Seth MacFarlane, John McIntyre, Gene Grillo, Jed Spingarn, Russell Calabrese, Kirk Tingblad, and Craig Bartlett.  I also feel I should be clear about this as well.  If I haven’t mentioned this already, I absolutely love Johnny Bravo.  As a kid, it was my favorite Cartoon Cartoon after Ed, Edd n Eddy and as an adult it still remains a favorite of mine.  In my own circles, the only other animation fans I have talked to who were also fans of Johnny Bravo were other men.  I have plenty of female friends who are animation fans and grew up watching Cartoon Network in the early-mid ’00s and none of them I talked about Johnny Bravo with cared for it very much.  I know this is purely anecdotal, but I suspect that this example speaks to my female friends’ experiences with the subject matter Johnny Bravo’s central focus is on vs. mine and my other male friends’ experiences with it.

One way that I think Johnny Bravo falls short in this regard is that it frames all of the women Johnny makes a move on as interchangeable, in their personalities and their designs.  Most of them aren’t even given names.  I understand that this is a show framed strictly from Johnny’s perspective and I don’t doubt for a second that he sees all the women as interchangeable.  However, the show never challenges that framing, and this is a show that has no problem putting Johnny back in his place in every other regard.  Since the show was so focused on Johnny, viewers never got a good perspective of what those women go through in their lives (because Johnny’s not the only man who treats any of them like a piece of meat) with the exception of the season four episode “Witch-Ay Woman”.  I understand that doing this would have made Johnny Bravo a very different show, but as it is a shortcoming is still a shortcoming nonetheless.

This brings me to the other shortcoming of the show.  Even though Johnny Bravo was constructed to be a satirical takedown of meat-headed male chauvinists like our titular character, audiences have long been trained to sympathize with the protagonist in a given piece of media.  As an example, a few years back CNN caught flak for their coverage of the Steubenville rape case because their coverage centered around how devastated the rapists must have felt hearing the guilty verdict and only mentioned the rape victim in passing.  Getting back to Johnny Bravo, the quandary the creators found themselves in is that although they want to use the character to denounce male chauvinism, they can’t make him so reprehensible that nobody would have a good reason to watch (a good example of utterly deplorable characters making a satire unwatchable is the short-lived Lil’ Bush).  So they responded by making Johnny really funny, charismatic, and endearing in his stupidity and failures.  Problems arise because oftentimes the endearing aspects of characters like Johnny obfuscate whatever satirical critique they were supposed to represent (see Homer Simpson, Archie Bunker, Eric Cartman, Glen Quagmire, Rick from Rick & Morty, Tony Montana, Jordan Belfort from The Wolf of Wall Street).  Since the audience is not granted as much exposure to all of the women Johnny makes moves on, it’s harder to empathize with them than with Johnny, even if it’s easy to understand why they all beat the crap out of him.

This brings me to a bigger quandary about satire that all satirists and aspiring satirists have to grapple with.  In short, doing effective satire is hard.  Really hard.  Effective satire has to carefully thread that fine line between authorial intent vs. death of the author with whatever statement the author intends to make intact and clear to the wider audience.  It is really easy for satire to fail somewhere and when satire fails, it inadvertently reinforces the idea it had attempted to take to task.

Speaking of a satirist often criticized for his portrayal of women, I think Robert Crumb is often a great case-study of satire that often fails.  There are definitely instances where his satire succeeds (this example is extremely graphic, so I’m only gonna share the first page of it, you can look up the rest yourself if you want to), but there are also many times where his satirical point is lost on me or on audiences in general.  The most infamous examples of this are his are “When the Niggers Take Over America” and “When the Goddamn Jews Take Over America”.  These examples are particularly infamous because white supremacist groups took these comics at face value and used them for recruitment.  I suspect that Crumb’s thought process behind these pieces are that the racism/antisemitism in them is so over-the-top that nobody could possibly believe this and that nobody could mistake him for being racist/antisemitic because his adoration for many African-American blues artists and marriage to a Jewish woman have long been public knowledge.

The problem is the first line of thinking is that Crumb naively underestimated how fanatically unhinged the beliefs of many racist/antisemitic people actually are.  The problem with the second line of thinking is that first of all, one can still perpetuate racism/antisemitism (intentionally or inadvertently) without explicitly holding those beliefs.  Second of all, the extent to which Crumb himself is not racist has never been clear to me.  I don’t think he necessarily believes all the stuff he portrayed in “When the Niggers Take Over America”, but I was never clear on what his point was with Angelfood McSpade and his constant portrayal of black people with sambo imagery in his older comix.  I’ve heard many times before that all that imagery was satirical but it never differentiated from intentionally racist imagery to me.  I suppose the sambo drawings are consistent with the 1920s aesthetic he drew his other characters with (Ku Klux Klan membership was at an all-time high in the 1920s), but that’s not a critique of racism.  I have always interpreted Crumb’s work as an expression of his id, unfiltered in its ugliness for all to see.  Just as Crumb has always been uncomfortably candid in sharing his sexual proclivities in his work (and in a way that is not at all flattering to himself), I always interpreted his sambo drawings as his own admission to his own latent racism (and his portrayals of women as his own latent misogyny).  It is what it is, but it ain’t a satire of racism.

To get back to Johnny Bravo, I stand by my assertion that its conception was an attempt of showing deference toward women and the advances they have made in society since the days of Pepe Le Pew.  But I’m more aware now of how it falls short than I was before and I thought it was important to be clear on that.

Further viewing:

Lindsay Ellis’ video essay discussing the very thin line Mel Brooks walked between satirizing and downplaying the crimes of the Nazis in The Producers.

[wolvesandfoxes25]

Sansa and Jon: Why?

So, yesterday I made a post, meta, what have you about Jon/Dany, and why I personally don’t think they’ll be together. Now, I’m doing Sansa and Jon.

It’s no secret that I’m a Jonsa shipper. As I said in my previous meta before season 6 came out, I honestly wasn’t a huge fan of Jon’s storyline. It had kinda flat-lined for me, for a little bit. Then Hardhome happened, and I grew interested again. 

Anyway. Before season 6 I didn’t even give Jon/Sansa a second thought. It was ridiculous. They had never spoken. They had no type of relationship (book and show.)

So, why these two? Well, let’s go over a couple of things. Jon and Sansa compliment each other rather well. Sansa is not a warrior, she’s not Ygritte, she’s no Val. But, in the books, it really dug into Jon’s wishes to what he wanted for his future. And it didn’t include fighting. It included having children that looked like his siblings. He lusts after Val, he does not love her. It’s as if he’s projecting what he wants onto her. But he knows he won’t get it. Sansa, in the books wants to return to Winterfell, as Jon does. She also wants to have children that look like her siblings. Weird? Not only that but their many parallels. Sansa started off as a lady, then a bastard. Jon started off a bastard, then a lord. Now a prince. 

Show wise: Their scenes in season 6 are not platonic. The way that they’re shot, the way that they’re acted, (mostly Kit). He looks at her a lot of the time, stares at her really. As if he’s trying to figure out who she is. Because guess what, they never had any kind of relationship with each other. They really don’t know how to act around the other. Like...hmmm...strangers I’d say. Anyway, the scenes. Let’s bullet the scenes here that questionable eye contact, physical contact happened....

1.) Meeting Jon again. (The hug was heart warming, just the point of the fact that two Starks had actually met again brought tears to my eyes.) But Jon, immediately recognizing her bunched up his hand, and moved back. As if he was hit with a force that shoved him backwards. He couldn’t believe it was her! Anyway, this scene itself doesn’t really (to me) have any romantic undertones. Moving on...

2.) After hug scene: Jon and Sansa are sitting in Castle black, sitting in front of a fire. Sansa’s sipping soup and Jon is staring at her. Like, he’s trying to figure her out. Since he has no relationship with Sansa, he doesn’t really know what to say. And he does stare at her, he definitely has a foreign emotions in his features that I can’t quite place in this scene. But then, after, they start to banter back and forth about Winterfell, and Sansa asks him to forgive her. He does, and they laugh. Then, she proceeds to ask for his ale, and he looks at her, in a humorous way. She drinks the ale, then chokes, and he laughs. That is a flirtatious action. See, a brotherly reaction would be...

“Ha. Knew you wouldn’t be able to drink it. This stuff’s terrible.” Or something like that. 

3.)Assembling the North scene: Now, this scene confuses me. 100% Jon stares at her a lot of this scene, but he doesn’t do it in a flirtatious way, he does it in a ‘learning her’ way. He’s trying to understand what she means, and what she wants. Then, when Davos is starting to put down her plans, he starts to get almost agitated, not at Sansa, but at Davos. He cuts in when Davos is done talking to her, telling him there’s more then three houses in the North, there’s two dozen more. Then the part where Sansa says that she has the Stark name. Jon looks at her, then Edd looks at him. Jon looked stunned at what she said. Ed looked at Jon in question. The whole scene is very confusing. I didn’t get it. 

4.)Cloak scene!: Jon approaches Sansa, asking her about her new dress. Now, I don’t know about you, but my husband told me  he NEVER notices what his sister is wearing. Sansa then proceeds to ask if he likes it, blushing slightly, smiling a little bit. Jon proceeds to stammer and say, “I like the wolf bit.” Lol, awkward, and definitely not a brotherly type of reaction. It was more flirting, but in a subtle way. 

Pause! Now, I just wanted to note that in every scene with Jon and Sansa, Sansa is always in the frame. Whether it be where Jon is talking to the Wildlings, where Sansa is present, or when they’re speaking to the houses. Sansa is always in frame with him. It could mean nothing, it could mean something. All I know is NOTHING ever means nothing. Let’s take a look at an example: In season 6, Cersei goes to talk to Lady Olenna, being rather...sweet and understanding with her. Well, at this time, we had no idea what her plan with the wildfire was. To us, Cersei was trying to get back in Olenna’s good graces, and giving her hope in having her grandchildren back. Cersei tries to talk her into staying. And she does this because she wanted her to be in the Sept of Baelor when it blew up. Killing Lady Olenna. 

A nothing scene is always something. 

5.)Wildling scene: There’s not much that happens here. But we do get to see the reactions of Sansa when Jon’s talking to the Wildling lords. She seems rather...okay with the Wildlings. She isn’t turning her nose up. And make note, Sansa is always standing behind Jon. When they’re talking to the wildlings, when they talk to Lyanna, and when they talk to Glover. She only talks when he gives her the “Oh shit, save me,” look. Such as the one he gave her when they met Lyanna. See..that’s another thing. With just a look, Jon can tell Sansa many things. They don’t need words. Which is awesome!

6.)Lyanna scene: They fed off each other’s silence. Jon knew when he needed to step in and Sansa knew when she needed to step in. It’s the unspoken thing they have with each other. It speaks volumes.

7.)Letter scene: Oh, I love this scene! I love it because Sansa really gets under Jon’s skin. And guess who else did that? Ygritte! She challenged him. And Sansa does that for Jon. She’s pushing him to gather more men, and the look of aggravation on his features says many things. One, he might strangle her. Two, oh seven give me strength. Lol, anyway. This scene showed that Sansa does push him, she pushes him to not give up, and to keep trying, keep looking. 

8.) Damnit, I forgot a scene. This one is the hand holding scene! Okay, so after the pink letter is read, Jon looks pretty downtrodden. Sansa pushes him to fight, reaching out and grabbing his hand. Now, this scene was panned in on. Which...if it was meant as a manipulative move on Sansa’s part, I don’t think they would have shown it. Then, when she grabs his fingers, he grabs hers as well, squeezing her fingers. I loved this part.

9.)Glover scene: Also not in order. Oops! Now, this one is important in many ways. One, I thinks it’s a little bit of a foreshadow about the ‘foreign whore’ thing Lord Glover said, in reference to Robb, and I think it could also apply to Jon, if he decided to randomly fall in love with Dany after two episodes. Anyway, they’re talking, and Sansa doesn’t step in until Glover is leaving. Well, he lays into her, letting her know that Robb fucked up. Well, if you watch closely, Jon turns his body towards Sansa and Glover as they’re talking. He’s stiff...he’s ready, just encase Glover wants to overstep his bounds. Jon was on alert, but  he was also paying attention to what Glover had said about Robb. Good! Hope he takes that to heart.

10.) Ramsay scene: Jons death glare. When Ramsay said he couldn’t wait to have Sansa back in his bed, Jon gave him a withering look. And they panned in on his features. To me, if it wasn’t meant to matter, they would have just expanded the scene to include Jon, and the people behind him. He also, at the beginning, offers a duel to Ramsay. Which, I guess could mean anything...?

11.) Tent scene: They argue, they yell at each other. And the candle lighting made me give it a side-eye. Yes, it’s true that Robb and Cat argued, but when they did, they were not in each others faces. They were sitting down, or standing up, yelling almost across the room at each other. Sansa and Jon closed the space in between them, and proceeded to argue...and PANT, might I add. Then, after the arguing, Jon promises to never let Ramsay touch her again. Also, not a brotherly vow. A brotherly vow would have been...

“I swear Sansa, I won’t let him hurt you again.” But no...the sentence was drug out, giving meaning behind every syllable Jon uttered, and the emotions in his eyes spoken volumes as well.

12.) Jon beating Ramsay: Jon goes crazy, unleashing the beast on Ramsay, beating him to death...then, Sansa’s there. Jon looks up, see’s her, and stops punching Ramsay. Now, we could say that he did this because Ramsay was Sansa’s to finish. But, I also think it’s because Jon did not want Sansa to see him that way. But, it also shows that Sansa brought him back from the darkness, with just her presence. Which...is what Cat did for Ned when he was strangling Littlefinger against the brothel. There is also that pause after they’re stopped. Ned is staring at Cat, Jon is staring at Sansa, then they look at their victims and let them go. 

13.) Forehead kiss!!!! it starts off with Sansa showing up, and Jon telling her she should have the Lord’s chambers. Which is a WEIRD thing for the siblings (cousins) to talk about. She proceeds to tell him he’s a Stark to her. And he smiles. Then, she apologizes to him about the KOTV. He stares ahead, then walks over to her, telling her they need to trust each other. Then, he proceeds to lean in and gently touch the side of her head, pulling her head forwards to place a gentle...yet long...kiss on her forehead. After he pulls back, he stares into her eyes for a good 3 seconds, then, stares at her lips before he comes back to himself and pulls away. Now, my thing is...Jon looks uncomfortable after this interaction, he’s walking away from her. And the only reason why he stops is because Sansa tells him Winter is here. After a little bit of flirting with their house words, Jon drops eye contact with her, turning away, and stiffly leaving. 

Ugh! Done! Anyway...I loved all of their scenes together, and some did definitely scream fishy. Or, that’s so not how a brother would kiss their sister. It would be weeeeeird.

Arya’s feelings towards this couple: It’s not secret that Arya and Jon are close...but me personally, I think Arya is going to meet her end...and I say this because if you look at the parallels between Arya and Lyanna, it’s really...eerie. To me these are the parallels...

Cat-Sansa

Ned-Jon

Lyanna-Arya

Bran-Benjen

Robb-Brandon

Ned-Rickard

Rickon- No answer to that one.

I definitely think history is repeating itself, it just won’t play out exactly how it did before. Anway, Arya’s storyline isn’t going to end with a marriage and children. To me, she’s going to die completing her list. Ever since Ned died, which was really when the series began, Arya has been going down a dark path. A path of vengeance...and justice, in her eyes. This path is going to be completed when she’s completed...when her list is completed. 

“Hates a good enough reason to keep going.” The hound says this to Arya in season 4?

Jon and Sansa would make a compelling couple. To me personally, something really big is going to happen to Bran, and he’s going to be called, or taken away from Winterfell. Maybe the new Knight King? That would explain the Benjen parallel, Benjen was a Knights watch man. He got lost beyond the wall. Which Bran did!

I think the last two standing will be Jon and Sansa. Like Ned and Cat were in rebuilding and restarting the Stark line basically. Not only that but the Ned and Cat parallels are constantly being shoved in our faces.

Example: Jon’s hair. Why did it need to be changed to look like Ned’s? Melisandre could have easily just taken his beard hair, as it showed during his resurrection. Why was that necessary?

Sansa is always being compared to Catelyn, not only in looks but in personality as well. Looks, willfulness, and definitely her hair, are Cat 2.0. Jon’s personality, looks, and his hair are Ned 2.0.

So...I am now done with my little meta/rant/example/break down thing...if you’d like to add anything...go ahead.

[bi-romantic-asshole]

Forget Me Not

Forget-Me-Not 3

 "Wait, hold up! You've liked him for how long?!" Eddy asked his best friend lying on the bed. Edd sighed as he sat up.

"You weren't paying attention, Eddy. I just mentioned that my feelings started developing by the end of junior high..." he rested his face in his hands and thought back to that frustrating year. "It was around the time he hit that growth spurt and grew taller than me. Without even knowing it, my eyes just kept following him everywhere," he played with a loose strand on his shirt as he continued, "in class... in the cafeteria... in the gymnasium. I couldn't help myself. He's just so... attractive," he dropped his head on his pillow and covered his face with his arm. Eddy sat cross-legged on the bed facing him. "When I finally noticed what I was doing, I just-" he lifted his arm a little to see his two friends. Eddy raised his eyebrows and waited for the genius to continue. Ed's head rested on the edge of the bed, watching his friends with a big smile on his face. Edd closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. There's nothing to worry about, Eddward. Your friends have already accepted you the way you are.

"You just, what, Edd?" Eddy asked, slightly impatient.

"When I realized I had feelings for our former bully, my mind just-" he opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling, "shut off." he finished with a sigh. Eddy's brows furrowed. Oh yeah...

"I remember... you were really gloomy for like two weeks back then. I just thought you were sick or something," he shrugged. Ed's head extended off the bed.

"Double D was sick, Eddy! Love-sick!" he said with a goofy grin. Eddy snickered. Edd blushed and turned to his side towards his friends. Seeing his friends smile and act as they were before made his heart swell.

"So... Are you both really alright with me and my-" he paused and shrunk a little, "homosexuality?" he asked quietly. Eddy rolled his eyes.

"Honestly, Sockhead. It's not a big deal. You're still our brain and best friend, right Lumpy?" Eddy turned his head to the other, but he was gone. "Lumpy? Where'd ya go?" he asked, looking around. Edd sat up and looked around too. He was there just a few seconds ago.

"Double D has a lot of Kevins under his bed," the big Ed's voice sounded from exactly under Edd. The other two glanced at each other. Eddy smiled wickedly when Edd's face flushed.

"Bring 'em out, Lumpy!" Eddy yelled. Edd squeaked.

"No no no no no no no no! Edwin Horace Hill, you get out from under there this instant!" Edd immediately bent down and reached under his bed. Eddy yanked his feet away and took his place, all the while cackling excitedly. A few moments of rustling and creaking passed before Eddy spoke up.

"Holy crap, Sockhead! You're a stalker!" Eddy pulled out a small wooden box and looked through the pictures of Kevin, as well as many others, but mostly Kevin. Edd pulled his hat over his eyes and shrunk further into the floor. Oh, how embarrassing! I knew I should have hidden them in the basement! Eddy picked out a few pictures of Ed and himself. "Wow. These are actually pretty good. Didn't know you were into photography," Eddy asked, sorting through the pictures for more of him and Ed. There was a lot. Edd peeked out of his hat, glad for the slight change of topic.

"Um, well- Nathan got me interested in it after he showed me a few pictures of the school," he reached under his bed and pulled out a camera.

"Nathan, as in Nat Goldberg?" Eddy asked with a look of disgust. Edd pouted. Eddy and Nat weren't exactly on good terms, what with Nat being Kevin's best friend and would always tease Eddy about his height and all.

"He's a great guy-" Edd hesitated, "once you get to know him..." he trailed off. Eddy scoffed.

"He's a rich gay motherfucker, no offence to you," Eddy put his hands up in defense and Edd rolled his eyes.

 AHCHOO! Kevin and Nazz flinched away at the sudden loud sneeze. Nat sniffled.

"Somewhere out there, someone is jacking off to my face," he said with a proud grin. Nazz scrunched up her nose.

"Gross," she said simply, then turned to Kevin. "So, you were saying?" she coaxed the redhead to continue his interrupted sentence. Kevin cleared his throat.

"I, uh- saw Double D earlier today," he started, and Nat's face lit up.

"And?! He's cute, isn't he? Cutest little nerd you've ever met, am I right?!" he asked excitedly. He inched closer to the suddenly uncomfortable redhead, all the while Kevin leaned away from the tealhead.

"Um- Well..." he rubbed the back of his neck and looked down to hide his warming cheeks. Nazz started inching closer just as excitedly.

"So what do you think? You like him, don't you?!" she spoke in a squealish tone. Seeing his friends so excited confused him. There he was, afraid to tell them that he might have a crush on his angel who turned out to be a guy, and that he might be gay, yet they only got excited and asked for details. Kevin's brows furrowed in disbelief.

"Wait, do you guys want me to like him?" he asked slowly. Nazz giggled as Nat nodded his head. Kevin stood from Nazz's armchair. "So, I was gay even before this?" he said with a bit of hope. That means it's fine, right? I can just go talk to him! Nat opened his mouth to answer 'Yes', but Nazz interrupted him.

"Well, not exactly," she tilted her head and shrugged. Kevin's small bit of hope shrunk.

"What do you mean, 'not exactly'?" he became even more confused. Nat answered.

"Kev, it's just that you've-" he looked at Nazz, who just lifted her brows to tell him to continue, "-never really told us anything about your sexuality," he shrugged and leaned against the headboard. "We kind of just knew."

"How?" Kevin was becoming impatient. He needed answers, truthful and direct. He thought he could get them from his best friends, but so far, all that was happening just frustrated him more. "How did you know I was gay if I never even told you?" his voice raised a little and he clenched his fists.

"Kev, calm down," Nazz tugged on the redhead's shirt, coaxing him to sit back down. When he did so, she continued. "Okay. First of all, you're not gay. If anything, you're bi like me!" she pointed at herself and grinned widely. Nat snickered. "Secondly, you did tell us, not by mouth, but by body language," she said while shaking her hips in a playful, flirty manner. Nat hummed in agreement.

"Body language?" Kevin shot Nazz an unbelieving look.

"Yeah! Like, you kept staring at Double Cutie whenever we were in the lab, and you said once that 'He's at his brightest when he's got Science,' and that you sometimes wish you could be closer to him," Nat re-animated the scene and impersonated Kevin as he explained.

"Also, you get excited whenever he tutors you in the library sometimes, and you panicked about what to get him for his birthday, though you decided to just give him a card and some jawbreakers..." Nazz's excited tone dropped a little by the end of her sentence.

"Yeah, and you always play it cool with everyone, but each time he greets you, you smile like a dork!" Nat was practically squealing by the time they finished. Kevin thought about what his friends had said. If that were true, then...

"If what you're telling me is true, then how come I never... did anything? I mean, obviously I've had a huge crush on him even before this, so why have I kept it a secret from even you?" Kevin slumped a little in the chair, trying hard to understand. Nat and Nazz shared a look of sadness. They smiled small.

"My guess is, you were afraid. You thought that having these feelings was wrong, and that no one can know about them..." Nazz spoke first. Although it was only a hunch, her words still rang true. Kevin had always been stubborn, to the point of having multiple girlfriends once just to get the local genius out of his mind. It didn't work.

"But it's okay, Kev. We totally support whatever you decide to do. It's no biggie," Nat shrugged. Lie, it was very biggie, but they didn't want to pressure him too much. In the end, he'd be the one to decide, after all. Kevin paused in thought for a moment, then he stood up.

"I'm gonna talk to him, and see if I really want him or not!" he said with determination. Nazz and Nat both cheered, as if Kevin had just won a lottery. Their cheers were interrupted however, by Kevin's ringtone. "Hello? Mom, hey. Oh, okay. Cool, lemme just say bye to my friends. Yeah, okay," as soon as he hung up, his face dropped. "My Aunt Casey's here again..." Nat's nose scrunched and he stuck out his tongue.

"Eeugh... Good luck," he said in a disgusted tone. Nazz laughed.

"Give her a big wet kiss for me," she said sarcastically, adding a kissy face to disgust the two more.

"Yeah, no. Gross. Anyway, I'll see you guys tomorrow," he walked out the door, then stopped. "I'll definitely talk to him tomorrow," he grinned before disappearing to the stairs. Nat and Nazz waved goodbye.

"How do you think it'll go from here?" Nazz asked as soon as the living room door closed. Nat shrugged, smiling widely at the blonde.

"It really depends on them now," he looked out the window in time to see Kevin looking over at Edd's house before going into his own. "We'll just have to wait and see~"