#my laptop just did the thing where it reverses my scroll & also makes it jump scroll instead of smooth scroll wtf?????

[pa-pa-plasma]

i know i never talk about animorphs but there's been a fanart piece i thought up a while ago that's been haunting me like i can't get this out of my head & it's above my skill (or more likely patience) level & it's killing me & i need to do it but i can't & it's killing me & it's killing me & it's ki

[jungyutas]

Need | Taeyong (NCT)

• pairing: Taeyong/reader

• genre: fluff. tooth rotting, sweet, domestic, fluff.

• warnings: none

• word count:  1.5k

• summary  → You really just wanted cuddles.

note: the name sounds very sexual but this is the opposite

            You were bored. You were really bored. It was the middle of the day and all you wanted at this moment to was to be cuddling your boyfriend, Taeyong. Unfortunately for you, that couldn’t happen since he was at practice, leaving you to count the minutes until he’s at your apartment so you could be in his arms.

            You headed over to your desk to use your laptop and see what you could do to pass time. You settled with scrolling through Twitter and Tumblr, even watched a few videos on Youtube, but nothing seemed to peak your interest. With a disgruntled groan, you shut your laptop, laid down on your bed and thought of all the things you could do to keep you occupied.

               There were a few assignments you had to do, but you knew your procrastinating self would do none of those. House chores? You thought, and again you thought against it, not having the motivation to do so. Finally, you just decided to roll over to the side of your bed where your table was placed and grabbed your phone to send random Snapchats to your friends.

               You played around with the filters and sent Snapchats of you making faces to your friends. It was more of the latter that you sent because you were never decent on Snapchat. When you took an actual cute photo of yourself, you thoroughly picked out who would see it and Taeyong’s name was on the list. You quickly added clicked the blue check button beside his name and sent the picture. On top of that, you thought to send him a Snapchat of you whining.

            “Taeyongiiieeeee, when is practice finishing?” You gave your best pout and whined, “I miss you. I want cuddles.”

            You laughed to yourself after watching the video, knowing very well your boyfriend would be a mess after seeing it. It was a cute, short video with a filter giving you cat ears and whiskers. You saw him last week, however, that also meant that was a whole week without cuddles because of his busy schedule. When it came to cuddling, you were almost as clingy as him. This was just one of those times where you needed extra cuddles and who better to get them from than Taeyong.

            In your relationship, Taeyong was more of the clingy one. He was always holding on to your side or  having an arm around you, and making sure you know he’s there when he is. It was cute. Clingy wasn’t really your type, but his was just enough to make you fall in love with him a just a little bit more. The roles were reversed today because you wanted to feel the warmth of his body next to yours.

            Your heart was warming the more you thought about the kind of cuddles Taeyong gives you. You could classify them into 3 categories: whiny cuddles, lovey cuddles, and comfort cuddles. Whiny cuddles were cuddles you’d get when Taeyong was being a big baby and wanted so very badly to get your attention from whatever it was that you were doing. In whiny cuddles, he doesn’t stop until he gets what he wants and with you being the softie that you are for him, he usually does. On the other hand, lovey cuddles were your usual kind of cuddles. They’re the ones where you can feel the love flowing between the both of you with your arms wrapped around each other. Those were your favorite ones. Lastly, comfort cuddles. It wasn’t like some cuddles weren’t comforting, they all were, as cuddles should be; comfort cuddles were extra comforting in a sense they were the kind that assured you he’d always be there for you no matter what. There were the kind of cuddles that would take place if one of you was feeling a bit down. The more you thought about his cuddles, the more you felt the absence of his presence beside you.

            You rolled onto your stomach and groaned into your pillows. You wanted Taeyong to be there now, not in a few hours. You just wanted to hug him and have his arms around you. You wanted to pepper his face with kisses. You just wanted Taeyong to be there.

             Honestly, you didn’t know where this was all coming from. It was true you loved cuddles and would get them whenever you wanted, but it was never like this. There was just this need to just have Taeyong by your side right there, right now. You weren’t entirely sure if you liked it or not. All you knew was that you wanted his cuddles. It was making your head hurt, so you closed your eyes and drifted off to a peaceful sleep.

               You woke up to your phone ringing. You let out small noises of annoyance as you tried to look for your carelessly placed phone. You could feel the vibrations from the call on your bed and soon you had it in your hand. You shot up when the caller ID read your boyfriend’s name.

               “Taeyongiiieee.” You greeted happily, “Is your practice over? Can you come here now?”

               You heard a soft chuckle from the other end. “I’m already here. Please open the door.”

               You all but ran to your door and smiled widely at the sight of Taeyong in front of you. He looked like he just freshened up a bit from practice, but was wearing a light shirt and black jogging pants. Words could not describe how happy you were to see him. You practically threw yourself on to him causing the two of you to lose balance.

               “Woah, calm down. Are you okay?” Taeyong asked you, pulling you away so he could look at you. There was a small smile tugging at his lips.

               Breathlessly, you responded to him, “Yes, I’m fine. I’m just really really really glad to see you so I can finally get all my Taeyongie cuddlies.”

               Taeyong’s heart almost beat out of his chest when you said that. How lucky was he to have ended up with someone as cute as you? That small gesture made him give you a quick peck on the lips to which you giggled at. You were like an actual child right now and Taeyong felt nothing but endearment towards it.

               Quickly closing the door after Taeyong stepped into your apartment, you waited as he took off his shoes then quickly pulled him by his hand to your bedroom. You jumped under the covers and patted the spot next to you, gesturing for him to come lie down beside you. A smile made its way to his mouth. His eyes were sparkled with amusement. You were adorable.

               He obliged your request and joined you on your bed. As soon as he was on it, you extended your arms out as a gesture for him to come closer so you could get the cuddles you’ve been craving the entire day. Taeyong was frozen, facing you as you did that, no smile on his face. Teasing you. His face broke out into a smile and a laugh melodiously fell out of his mouth once he saw your pouting face. He came closer and you positioned yourself so that you were facing him, one arm laid across his torso. Your leg instinctively hooked across his own. One of his arms wrapped around your shoulders protectively, the other placed parallel to yours on his stomach, his hand stroking your arm gently.

               You were finally wrapped in his embrace. Finally. Your face was buried in his chest. There was a smile on your face. It felt so good for him to be with you. You breathed in his scent and it made you want to scoot even closer to him. Being with him made you feel warm. It wasn’t just his body heat, but something inside you was bubbling with excitement and serenity that spread through you whenever you were with him. You loved him. You loved him more than your words could describe.

               Taeyong looked down at your calm figure. You were both comfortable in the current position you were in. If he was being honest, he missed you probably as much as you missed him. He was startled when he opened the Snapchat of you begging for him to come over. It was usually him making a fuss and bothering the other to go and give him attention. It was a pleasant surprise. He wouldn’t mind you being like this more often.

               His heart filled with love as he stared at you. He felt the same warmth you felt spread through his body and couldn’t help but place a small kiss on the top of your head. This caused you to look at him. He didn’t miss the way your eyes were slightly glazed over or the way his heart skipped a beat in his chest when you looked at him. He was completely and utterly in love with you. He kissed you again, but this time on your lips. It was a soft kiss. No urgency and not a lot of force. It was enough for you to understand the message he was trying to relay to you.

               When you pull away, the two of you continue to stare at each other, both in awe. You quickly peck him on the lips again then proceed to bury your face in his chest again.

               This. This was alright. You wouldn’t mind spending an eternity in this bed with him like this. He wouldn’t either.

[gorgeousdan]

notdanhowell

summary: Dan has a guilty pleasure: phan blogs. It’s a mixture of conceited arrogance and morbid curiosity, really. And really, it’s a mixture of these two things that lead to him catfishing members of his phandom and becoming a headcanon blog. After all, what harm can one headcanon do? word count: 1323/20,000 (why’s it so short?) warnings (this chapter): mentions of sex (dan writes a dirty hc)

LAST CHAPTER |  NEXT CHAPTER

Three a.m rolls around again and Dan finds himself in notdanhowell’s inbox looking for something to write. It’s like a monster has been unlocked in him since he wrote that stupid kissing headcanon, like a bad upgrade in a video game. All he can think about is kissing Phil, touching Phil, doing frankly inappropriate things to someone who’s supposed to be his best friend.

But it’s fine if he writes about it, okay? Then it’s not a fantasy, it’s fanservice. He doesn’t have a problem. It’s fine.

Dan scrolls through a few of the prompts. There are some that make him laugh, like him and Phil using glitter lube in a public washroom, a few that scare him, like one where he’s Phil’s slave and he’s locked up and that might actually be illegal?

superpaperclip said:

hc about what d & p are like in bed? love your blog, dani!

Meg stares him down in their profile photo. Dan lets out a resound sigh.

Why not?

notdanhowell said:

dan’s probably loud. the neighbors probably bang on the walls to get him to shut up. dan’s favorite position is riding phil, where he gets to be in charge while still getting fucked, because lbr we all know that dan’s a whore for cock. he also likes when phil’s on top of him so that he can scratch up phil’s back, leave red marks that mark phil as his.

phil probably has more control than dan does in bed. he’s not loud, but he enjoys it anyway. the noises phil makes are probably deep and go right to dan’s dick. his favorite position is either reverse cowgirl, so he can watch dan’s ass as it moves because dan’s ass is noice, or missionary, because phil’s probably a romantic little shit who likes to stare into dan’s eyes.

Dan tags the ask appropriately and presses post. He can’t help but think about it, Phil hovering over him, kissing down his neck, telling him what a good boy he’s being.

Dan’s door squeaks open. Dan jumps, slams his laptop lid shut. Phil’s standing in the doorway with his duvet wrapped around his body. He stands there for a minute. “I couldn’t sleep,” he says, and his voice sounds tired. “Can I come sleep in here?”

Dan puts his laptop to the side. He doesn’t say anything, but lifts his duvet in invitation. Phil gets under, puts his own over the two of them.

“What’s up with the lack of sleep, Mr. Lester?” Dan asks. He scoots over a bit so that Phil will have room to sleep next to him.

Phil sighs. His eyes are closed, but Dan can tell he’s awake. Years of being someone’s best friend means you know these kinds of things about them. “I was worried about you,” he says.

Now it’s Dan’s turn to sigh. Despite the conversation they had on the tube, he knew Phil wasn’t going to drop it. It just wasn’t like his best friend. “I told you that you don’t have to be.”

“I know.” Phil opens his eyes and turns so that he can lean his head against his hand. He uses his free hand to grab Dan’s, laces their fingers together. “I just don’t like the idea of you being lost in your head.”

Dan pulls Phil to his chest at that. Phil tangles their legs together, and despite the fact that they’re both tall, lanky guys, it’s nice. Phil sighs a little bit and Dan can tell that he thinks so too.

They fall asleep twinned together like this, and Dan can’t help but feel a little bit bad.

-

Dan wakes up the next morning to his phone ringing. It somehow doesn’t wake Phil up, the heavy sleeper he is, but Dan groans at the loud ringing. He turns onto his side to look who it is. His mum. Great. This should be fun.

Don’t get him wrong, Dan loves his mum. It’s just that every time she calls, Dan can expect the same “got a partner, yet?” talk. Honestly, it’s kind of aggravating. It’s not as if he doesn’t want to have a partner, it’s just that getting one would require going outside and talking to people and meeting people. Dan much prefers staying inside with Phil and watching anime or the Great British Bakeoff.

Christ, he’s got it bad, hasn’t he?

Dan answers it with a soft, “yeah, hello?” so as not to wake his best friend.

“Dan!” calls his mum. Dan can’t help but smile at her voice. He truly does love her. “Did I wake you?”

Dan runs a hand through his hair. He grabs Phil’s phone so he can check the time. Half past nine. “Yeah,” he answers truthfully. “But that’s probably for the best. Millennials like me will sleep until one in the afternoon.”

Dan’s mother laughs. “Don’t I kno-”

She’s cut off by a groan from behind Dan as Phil blinks awake. “Dan?” he says, and his voice is so thick with sleep that Dan knows his mother won’t be able to miss it. “Who’s that?”

“My mum,” Dan mouths. Phil nods his understanding and motions that he’s going to the kitchen. As soon as Phil leaves, Dan’s mother is talking his ear off.  

“That was Phil, right?” she asks. “Why was he in your bedroom?”

Dan sighs. “He just fell asleep in here last night, mum.���

“Are you two dating?”

“No. We’re just friends.”

“Do you want to be more?”

Dan takes a deep breath at that. Does he want to be more than friends with Phil? Of course he does. He wants to be Phil’s boyfriend and kiss him and have lazy sex with him in candlelight. Well, that sounds a little dangerous but. You know.

But he can’t tell his mother any of this, because she wouldn’t understand what it’s like to be an angsty twenty something with an online personality where he writes fanfiction where he’s fucking his best friend. “I gotta go, mum. Phil’s made breakfast.”

Dan’s mum sighs, and he can tell this isn’t the last he’s going to hear of it. “This isn’t the last we’re going to talk about this,” she confirms. “Love you lots. Be safe.”

“I will. Love you too. Bye.”

Dan hangs up the phone and throws it onto his bed. He stretches out his back, which is knotted from sleeping with Phil on top of him all night.

Not that you’re complaining, Dan’s brain supplies unhelpfully. Dan resists the urge to slap himself.

Dan walks into the kitchen, where Phil is currently pouring a second bowl of cereal. Dan takes the first, bites into it. “Morning,” he greets his best friend.

“Morning,” Phil replies. He puts the cereal and the milk back, leaves the cabinet open. Dan pushes it closed with a fond eyeroll. As soon as he does, Phil’s looking over at him. “How gay does your mum think we are for each other?” he asks.

Dan laughs. “Pretty god damn gay,” he answers. “Just like all of our friends, basically.”

Phil scoffs. He puts his bowl down on their counter and gives Dan a look that means it’s time to be serious.

Dan sips his tea and braces himself.

“It’s stupid, isn’t it?” Phil asks. At Dan’s raised eyebrow, he elaborates. “I mean, it’s stupid that everyone thinks we’re dating. Because we’re not. Just because we’re secure in our friendship and sexuality and like to cuddle doesn’t mean we’re anything other than friends.”

Dan swallows his tea. “Right?” He says. “Like, if we wanted to date,” he swallows. “Like, we just would.”

“Right?” Phil asks.

“Right,” Dan confirms.

The two of them stand in a silence that’s vaguely awkward for a moment. Then, Phil says, “I’ve got an episode of the Great British Bakeoff on DVR.”

Dan accepts the peace offering. “Cool,” he says. “Let’s go.”

Dan ignores the texts from his mother.

AUTHOR’S NOTE:

Thank you to all the people who signed up to be a part of notdanhowell! It was actually so many people that I don’t know if I’ll manage to get everyone (I’m sorry!) but I’ll definitely give everyone a thanks in the final author’s note.

I actually really like this chapter for no reason. Hope you do too.

Please reblog to spread the word about my blog! Also, a thanks to @superpaperclip for letting me use their URL and sully their good name lmao. I hope I did you justice, Meg. 

Thanks y’all 

-Seb

[duaneodavila]

The 2018 Gift Guide For Law School Grads

UPDATED FOR 2018! NEW ITEMS AND SOME 2017 CLASSICS RETURN. The law school odyssey is coming to a close for many students this year, and before the focus shifts to studying for the bar exam and staring blankly into the middle distance contemplating disappearing job prospects, these graduates deserve some gifts.

Obviously, the best gifts for a newly minted J.D. would be “comprehensive debt relief,” “job offers,” or “straight cash, homey.” Unfortunately, you may not be able to deliver these gifts — at least not in amounts that anyone wants — or you may just not care that much about the graduate.

So we’ve compiled some gift ideas, ranging from serious to specious, for you to consider.

Before we begin, a quick policy statement: ATL is not being paid to promote any of these products, but when available from Amazon, the products are featured with affiliate links, meaning that ATL receives a small commission from Amazon if you buy something through that site.

I broke things down into categories. You can jump to a section through this table of contents, or you can scroll at your leisure:

Office Equipment Gizmos The Case Toys & Games Booze Non-Alcoholic Drinkers Jewelry Books Clothes Art

Office Equipment

If your graduate is lucky enough to have a job lined up for after the bar exam, consider office accouterments. A bare law firm office is one of the saddest scenes in the world. Levenger makes a handsome desk set that can be purchased in whole or in part to spruce up an office. The “bomber jacket” theme rests comfortably between modern and throwback. And they can decorate this set with their personalized pen set. Which they can use on their Ruth Bader Ginsburg stationery.

For a slightly more “old school” look, here’s a burgundy oak set from Amazon. This set is a little cheaper and includes a letter opener, and what gift is complete without a sharp object? Though some lawyers should not be anywhere near sharp objects.

It’s always a good idea to try to stay in shape while staring blankly at a screen with a standing desk and companion treadmill.

On the lighter side, there’s this paperweight with words every lawyer can live by. There’s also the Legal Decision Maker Desk Paperweight that allows a lawyer to cede all decision-making to the Fates. And here’s something for the nagging client asking for something for free.

Gizmos

A lot of people have Apple Watches. But those are kind of cheap looking. Here’s a smartwatch that looks professional. And yes, this is actually a picture of a smartwatch.

Straddling the gap between office equipment and gizmos is this “Law & Justice” pen that can convert to a stylus for touchscreen devices.

Does your grad want to stay in shape but not look like an 80-year-old woman? Either this FitBit accessory or this one from Kate Bracelet will do the trick.

The Case

The classic law school gift is a briefcase. But the days of the hard-sided rectangle of doom are in the past. A soft-sided, elegant bag that can store a laptop with room to spare is the order of the day. Kenneth Cole makes just such a bag in brown, black, and tan.

For a more vintage look, here’s a retro messenger satchel.

And if you feel compelled to purchase a hard-sided briefcase, Alpine Swiss offers an expandable briefcase with pockets for modern essentials like a smartphone.

One more option is the iPad case. For example, this leather iPad Pro case from Snugg. Or if they’re on the Surface Pro 5 train, here’s a case.

Toys & Games

People love Funko Pops and there are some available for your fictional legal heroes. Like Lawyer Morty. Or She-Hulk in lawyer attire. There’s obviously a Matt Murdock too.

And, of course, there’s Passing The Bar, the board game designed to help the graduate overcome the next hurdle in their lives. Or the “Game of the Year” award-winning LAWSUIT! Board Game. How about some Cards Against Lawyers?

Maybe golf is your grad’s game? If so, there are legally-themed golf balls and divot repair tools out there.

This isn’t so much a “game” I suppose, but Mental Floss created Law School in a Box tagged “All The Prestige For A Fraction Of The Price.” Which is better than the new InfiLaw motto: “Nulla pretium eadem auctoritate.” We’ll see how good my Latin translator widget is.

Booze

Lawyers like to drink. They don’t call it a “JD” for nothing. But as a graduation gift, a case of PBR tall boys seems a bit gauche. It’s time to drink classy.

Is a lawyer having a good day or a bad day? This wine glass will let everyone know.

It is an indisputable truth that “Bourbon is a great way to alcohol.” Caskers, a spirit distributor founded by Harvard Law grads, offers a Whiskey Club, providing a selection of craft whiskeys.

Sadly Bender Bound’s federal reporter volume that can also hide a flask of a favorite beverage appears to be discontinued (though you can still get a handsome Sherlock Holmes volume or this Edgar Allan Poe collection to perform the same task). But you can still get your law grad a commemorative flask!

Non-Alcoholic Drinkers

If the grad’s liquid drug of choice is caffeine, there are some cute legally-themed coffee mugs out there. For example, this Supreme Court case mug displays famous cases when cold, and shows only shortened names when filled with hot liquid. It’s like the blue mountains on a Coors Light in reverse! Another mug with the same qualities is the Disappearing Civil Liberties mug, which shows the Bill of Rights when cold and erases those getting compromised daily when filled up and hot.

Or for the more honest out there, we have this World’s Okayest Lawyer Mug.

Jewelry

This is, admittedly, not my best category to set up since the only scenario where I’d wear a ring is if I’ve, in fact, won a Super Bowl. Thankfully I have colleagues who can help me out on this one.

Jewelry for Counsel makes, well, jewelry for counsel, such as necklaces in a variety of styles, as well as earrings and cufflinks featuring the scales of justice.

Here’s a scales of justice charm with an inspirational graduation message. There’s also this one for the grad who believed she could.

Our own columnist Niki Black has an array of jewelry available at Legally Boho. I was drawn to this clockface bracelet. Nothing like a clock on your wrist that never moves to remind you that you could be billing more!

Books

The hackneyed option is Oh, the Places You’ll Go! But come on, let’s get original. Maybe it’s my newfound interest in the legal significance of Dr. Seuss, but I’d go with Yertle the Turtle and Other Stories. The tale of Yertle’s unrealistic demands at the expense of the minions he trods upon is just the thing to prepare the grad for a career in Biglaw.

Now this book is awesome! All the author’s New York bar exam notes illustrated with delightful cartoon stick figures. The New York Bar Picture Book may not replace their bar prep course, but it’s a fun and useful study aid.

How about the collected wit and wisdom of Mark Twain on lawyers?

There’s also The New Yorker Book of Lawyer Cartoons if your grad is the sort who wants to say, “Hey, I’m a lawyer, and I’m also pretentious.”

You can also, of course, pick up Supreme Ambitions by our own David Lat.

Clothes

Everyone needs socks.

Look, the law school graduate probably already has some professional attire — they did interview after all — so maybe you should get them something to wear when they relax. For a day every six months or so.

Like this Better Call Saul t-shirt. For It’s Always Sunny fans, they can proudly proclaim their specialty in bird law. And while many law grads shuffle off to an Am Law 200 firm, for the small or solo inclined, here’s a Nelson & Murdock shirt.

For the dressier occasion, these “Equal Justice” cufflinks are available on Etsy

Art

This poster of the Supreme Court’s female justices is a sharp addition to a legal office. And this Thurgood Marshall painting is legitimately awesome.

How about lawyer refrigerator poetry? Perhaps you feel this is more literary than artistic, but admit it — your refrigerator poetry is more for show than publication isn’t it?

Look, when it comes to art, nothing tops dogs playing poker. Thus, I bring you “dogs being lawyers” in Breach of Promise Suit.

It doesn’t get classier than that.

Feel free to email us other suggestions!

The 2018 Gift Guide For Law School Grads republished via Above the Law