#my funny little genderless friend

[feltcreature]

seeing so many fhfif ocs lately and it makes my heart SO happy so i wanted to draw my figment again…. little jitters

[holostarz]

my problem is i think most of p5s ships are cute and thats why i almost always am down for some form of polythieves

usually i just lump all the guys together cause all those ships are just so good to me??? and i mean like, every combination of them, even without ren. ill ship ryuji and yusuke. and i also love goro with either of them. ryugoro and akekita are so rare but theyre so nice?? they all just. clenches fists. theyre so good ot4 pegoryugorokita

goroann besties is real in my heart. also goroharu being like the Cursed besties ever in the end like. my god they have such a wack and unhinged platonic soulmates/kindred spirits potential. goromako rivals forever my guy they are so fucking funny. and ryukoto is kinda cute...

i think shumako is nice but its just not my cuppa tea. they are dear friends and i do love the image of ren and makoto being a bit rivalcoded and butting heads over phantom thievery and how to lead the team best. and goro is weirdly the one who can actually somehow stop arguments before they happen and get them to compromise.

makoto is NOT the mom friend okay she is the bossy and protective older sister friend. and she is smart and sensible but not immune to her friends infecting her with Stupid. ren is the mom friend. and the dad friend. best of both things. :)

ren: its hard raising 8 kids when youre in high school and an 18 y/o whos like if a divorced widow was a boy 😔 sojiro: what happened to your husband??? ren: he was lost at sea goro: ren, look at this dog i saw on my way here ren: i can still hear his voice

meanwhile i love futago half siblings headcanon. so while goro and makoto are a little more sibling rivalry coded, futaba is still goros actual gremlin sibling who will bully him to death. meanwhile, futaba is actually adoptive siblings with ren. these two are WAY more sibling coded than goro and futaba ever.

and when futaba starts trying to do similar Sibling dynamic things with goro. goro is like ??? "ren, futaba just came in here. stared at me. burped. and then left. what does this mean." and ren is like. "oh is there food? theyre probably telling you theres food and to come out if you want some. or if this is your first time seeing them today they could just be greeting you." and goro is like ????? but louder this time

i love shujin trio poly... and i default to them being the OG Cule. shuann? v cute love them. ryuann? also cute and honestly v funny of how messy i imagine their hookups being. like they keep breaking up and eventually finding their way back to each other. sometimes i see them as sibling coded, too, more than anything else. overall i just love these three together they are the tomodachis of all time they are partners for life

i also love ryuharu. and harukita (yuharu?) theyre really cute.... then theres good ol makoharu and annmako (makoann?) and i love them too... honestly love hifumi and makoto too?? i think they would be huge fucking dorks together... perhaps.... rivals, even?

goro and hifumi being friends... good shit. hifumi and yusuke being close friends? plz... and ren and hifumi are just. wahh i love them theyre so good. even futaba and hifumi could be cute, honestly.... wtf

and we cannot forget ANNSHIHO,,, forever. my GORLS.... lesbiabs of my heart.

anntaba is a rare one but theyre also v cute to me... and if they arent girlfriends i love the idea of futaba having a crush on her and then realizing those feelings are actually just Admiration and Gender envy. i also love the idea of morgana finding out his crush on ann is ALSO GENDER ENVY RELATED.... we love nonbiney morgana. hope is genderless

ren: my CAT IS TRANS!? NOT CLICKBAIT?

and makoto is always being an older sister to futaba. yutaba is nice, too. i honestly see futaba and yusuke being aspec and theyre platonic soulmates and in a qpp. and ofc sumitaba my beloved... i love sumitaba a lot

i adore ryusumi too like oh myg od,,.. wahh.... the sweeties. sumikita is so rare but like. i think they could be kinda cute too?? sumigoro is V platonic soulmates to me like my god theyre so. clenches fist. honestly whole royal trio tbh is just. "they can make each other worse" and each of them thinking "thank god im the normal one here" thats it thats the whole dynamic. and its so funny.

shusumi is cute too but honestly i think i prefer both ren and goro have somethin of a platonic soulmates or older sibling dynamic with sumire. they have adopted her okay. sumiann isnt one i see a lot either but they.... THEM.....

any mishima ship is super funny imo but like, theyre cute. love yuuki having a crush on ren but like. the game makes it near impossible for you to actually be fucking nice to him so i always get the vibe that ren would rather keep him at a distance, even tho they appreciate him and care about him.

its okay tho cause i say hes good friends with the OG trio + shiho and they vibe. yuuki crushing on goro, to his own horror? hilarious. and weirdly enough shiho and ren?? idk what their acronym is. but. oh my god. theyre actually weirdly cute? but i see them having disaster twins energy. theyre absolute menaces.

[sin-sidejob]

Inside Job — New Years

warnings: NSFW, minors DNI, 18+, mentions of sex, allusions to sex, heavy petting, makeout, mentions of alcohol and food, limited consumption of alcohol and or food, genderless reader, gender-neutral pronouns and pet names, mentions of family.

contents: pretty mild considering my other work but tagged adult for safety. cute kissing and making out with your faves, their new or old holiday traditions, mentions of food and drinks and holiday fun. Happy New Year drama free and fillied with fun. Hope y'all enjoy!

a/n: Happy New Years!! From me and the shadow board to you all!! 💖

Brett Hand

the two of you manage to tuck into the corner of the bar you were celebrating in, Brett wanting to join in on the tradition you had with your friends of celebrating out on the town for New Year's and having fun with the family you've found and enjoying the moments and the hijinks that nearly always tend to ensue.

Brett, for some reason, keeps thinking that your friends don't like him when they've threatened you with either stealing him away should you ever hurt him or break his heart or just outright trading you out for Brett. You can't say you're upset, you'd say the same thing. You love this man.

"Thank you for letting me come along!" He exclaims over the music and the noise, bringing you a refill from the bar of the drink you had, making sure to take your drinks and cover them whenever you stepped away or had to use the restroom, taking a sip to assure you they were safe even though you trusted him with your life and told him so, constantly, "I'm having a lot of fun, your friends are kinda' great."

"Funny, they're saying the same about you honey," you murmur in his ear, taking the opportunity to talk low and drape yourself across him like velvet in the cadence of the atmosphere, "telling me everything I already know about, like how wonderful you are, how charming and sweet you can be. How handsome and smart you are," you carry on, littering kisses on the underside of his jaw, uncaring for anyone who manages to see.

"My Brett."

"Your Brett?" he laughs, hesitant and a little nervous, surprised at how affected he is by that statement on your lips. He feels you nod against him as you drape the hand holding your drink over his shoulder while you press your forehead against his neck. "Mhm, they keep threatin' to replace me with you should I treat you wrong."

"Really?"

You nod in response against him, not noting the awe and surprise in his tone and how taken aback he is, always forgetting how your boy is so easily swayed by himself into thinking he's lesser when in reality, he's everything and more. The countdown begins, and quickly you're joined by your friends all gathering around to yell along with the ball drop and for the new year to begin, meanwhile you can't be bothered and have been unable to look away from Brett since the moment you laid eyes on him this morning in bed.

"Absolutely. Wanna' show off and be my kiss at midnight?" and Brett nods enthusiastically in response, taking the drink from your hand and downing it on one, very frat-like, go and bringing you back close to tell you how much he loves you between the both of you. He kisses you into the New Year and manages to do it for the rest of them, and they always feel just the same. Otherworldly.

JR Scheimpough

you celebrate New Year's at a party the two of you were invited to, dressing to the nine's and going out to dinner beforehand at some restaurant that was probably already booked out for weeks, if not months, and yet getting let in with ease from barely any effort from JR. Show off. After dinner, the two of you take a ride and head up to the party from the invitation, a top-floor party at some politician or CEO's place, a big band in full swing with an open bar. It's a black-tie event and you're glad you planned accordingly because you still both look more expensive than the rest do altogether. The two of you manage to sneak a few messy kisses in the elevator before you arrived on the floor, being able to fix his hair after nearly ruining it just before the doors open. If it's noticeable that he's flushed and his lips are puffy, no one comments on it.

after the usual schmoozing and small talk, the both of you sneak away to a balcony overlooking the D.C. spread, wind merciful and not being as cold as it could be in the night. JR comes back after refilling your drink to find you draped over the balcony and admiring the view before he joins you, commenting something coy in your ear and getting you to giggle before he hands you your drink and you both cheer, something murmured about great company and another year down, another to go as you clink your glasses together and drink in celebration.

After sipping away at the sparkling drink within the crystal flutes, he sets them both aside so he can take you in his arms and hold onto you while swaying to the music playing from indoors, Life Is but a Dream by The Harptones crooning low as you get swept up into JR's strong, steady arms and get spun out then brought back to his chest, your arms sidling around his neck as you play with the short hairs at the nape.

The song slows to something more melodious and lilting, Chopin if you had to guess, and listen to the countdown begin. He keeps you calm and grounded as the cheering picks up in volume, a large hand encompassing your hip locking you in the moment and not letting you get swept up away in the current of it all.

You get to soak up the moment with him, feel strong arms wrap around your waist as he makes you forget everyone else around you both, the countdown from the next room, and the fireworks nearly a city away firing off in the distance. All you can feel is him and his touch, the brush of his nose against your pulse as he hums the notes of songs that play softly against your skin, inhaling your perfumed scent as you sway chest to chest, wholly enveloped with each other rather than anyone else. You start the new year off right, with each other, and it's better than any other year you've had already.

Your gloved hand grasps his chin and lifts his head up to hover near yours, watching his eyes blink open and lid half-shut, peering down at you with a concoction of adoration and lust pooling in dark eyes. Counting down, you murmur the digits in the space between you both, telling him happy new year just before you kiss him and the new year begins, the old one still close by as you let him make you forget about it all.

He’s your New Year's kiss and every resolution you could make.

Alpha Beta Robotus

It's his first New Year beyond being locked up in the basement or left in tube-based solitary confinement. With that in mind and you making sure you take him home with you, not letting anyone have the mere idea of stopping you and your plan for the midnight countdown, you've set yourself on a mission to start the new year with him. And you intend on making it a good one.

"You've got mistletoe?" Alpha Beta stares quizzically up at the plant you've managed to hang high on your ceiling above the doorway to your kitchen between the hallway where you both now stand, "Isn't that a little excessive?"

"Only if you suddenly have lost interest and are letting me know that I've now got to find someone else to supply my kisses up to the New Year." You shoot back, looking up at him with a shit-eating grin he is tempted to kiss off, now that you've mentioned it, standing in your fuzzy socks upon the hardwood waiting for the sitcom-loving robotic bastard to just kiss you already.

While you're contemplating on whether to tug him in by the lapels or by his hair, Alpha Beta leans down and cups your cheek before kissing you tenderly, softly, with all the grace and poise of a noir heartthrob in one of those films you see off the classic movie channel. "No, I don't think I've lost any interest."

"That's sweet and all, but I'm afraid you'll just have to remind me, thoroughly." you murmur, eyes darting between his and then back down to his mouth, returning to glance up into glacier eyes just before he tugs you closer with a strong arm around your waist as he presses his lips to yours once more. He's picked up humming as he kisses you, another trait he's mirrored and adopted over time, and it feels better knowing that Alpha Beta's kissed you so many times he can't help but mirror it back to you.

By the time the countdown nears, he's got you spread and sidled on his lap, thighs encasing his as his fingers slide beneath the waistband of your pants and over your underwear, teasing you in strokes that match the tempo of the countdown and leave you keening against him impatiently. He tuts and chides at the show you're putting on and just as the countdown ends and the new year begins, you tug him into a kiss by his hair and he groans low, jaw clicking mechanically as his eyes glow a fraction before shutting.

Alpha Beta's hand finally begins to play with you properly and by the time you breach for air, you're dazed and beaming, already looking fucked out as you keep him close by his half-undone tie and grin.

"Happy New Year, AB, now fuck me until I forget it."

Gigi Thompson

She doesn't get a lot of solid downtime to spend with friends or family, so when she gets to enjoy herself and hang out with her loved ones, she goes all out. Gigi spent the holidays at home with you but convinced you to join along with her trip down to Georgia to see her family for New Year's, claiming that you're family to her the same as they are.

After a flight that took no time at all, spending it eating snacks and watching comedy specials, you manage to get to her parent's house in no time. The visit isn't as daunting as it could be, you having made the basic introductions and impressions at her family reunion last summer, already knowing her parents well enough to help out with cooking or setting up rather than just being left to stand around as a guest. You get the family treatment and damn if it doesn't make you a little teary-eyed.

"And you didn't think that they liked you," Gigi comments after prep is all set up and done, the two of you out on the back porch drinking tea and enjoying weather that's at least slightly warmer than D.C. "I can't help it, I'm always going to try and make a good impression, no matter how long I'll know them for."

Gigi laughs and gives you a pitying pat on the knee which you playfully swat away before she sips at her iced tea. "Can't be that bad, and besides, it's New Year's Day that's the eventful time. Eve just means drinking and talkin' shit before the rest pile on in tomorrow. That's when the real shit starts."

"Noted," you murmur into your glass before seeing the soft light of the house behind you both reflect on her face and how the night air makes her just glow. Her parents mention the countdown starting from inside but leave you both to your own devices. You take her hand in yours and squeeze gently, her matching it and then counting down between grasps of each other's palms as the countdown gets closer and closer to midnight.

Setting your drinks aside, you brush her hair back behind her ear and cup her cheek, careful not to muss her makeup if you can help it. "Love you, Gigi," you murmur, enjoying how her eyes don't hide the emotion in them, seeing her reciprocate in look before words. "Love you too, baby," she shoots back, lips in a blushy grin. You hear the final numbers said aloud and hear her parents celebrate from inside, maybe even a bottle popping, but you only focus on the woman before you as you pull her close and kiss her over and over again, starting a New Year tradition you'd like to continue to the rest of y'all's days. You do.

Reagan Ridley

With everything going on in her life, the last thing she needed was some unnecessary party that she'd have to get all dressed up for, fake some smiles, and give some unwilling hugs, all the while wanting to be curled up at home with you. And that's what she proposes and does. You have a lazy day, not even bothering to change out of pajamas until necessary, and even then you both change into clean sweats and old sweatshirts or tees. It's much needed, a lazy holiday, especially just being able to talk about everything and nothing while being sprawled across the couch or your bed and enjoying one another.

She's got movies selected and queued for the whole day, a mix of your collected favorites and some new ones the two of you had been meaning to watch but hadn't had the time to until today. Snack breaks come regularly, absolutely enjoying yourself while gorging down chips and popcorn and your favorite snacks while you've got Reagan's legs in your lap and toss bits of candy or popcorn into her mouth.

Her New Year's were always filled with family drama or facades, but this year, for the first time in a long time, she gets to enjoy it fully and not fake her smiles into something unreal. No, you earn and deserve every single crooked one thrown your way from her and you cherish each one received more than the last. There are naps and intermissions and moments where neither of you say a word for the entirety of the movie, only knowing each other are awake from slight movements or each other's hands grazing across each other's body. Other times the two of you are laughing so hard you're crying, over literally nothing at all and struggling for breath. The type of wheezing, hysteric, can-barely-hold-it-together laughter. It's a good sight on her.

The two of you are nearing the end of another movie when Reagan glances at the clock and sees that midnight is approaching fast. She scrambles up and into her kitchen, yelling from the other room that there's no need to pause the movie - which you do anyways - and hear her shuffle about and pull something from the fridge and pop a cork. She pours glasses and brings in two flutes of something bubbly and bright, either champagne or sparkling cider, and whatever graces your tongue has you grinning at her in your tattered sweater and fuzzy pants with the snoopy print.

Taking in the moment, you pull up onto the screen the ball drop and curl up against one another, infectious grins on both of your faces as you watch the countdown and share the experience. It's memorable and you'll never let go of the feeling you have when you're right beside her, hand in hers. It's electric.

Reagan kisses at your knuckle from your conjoined hands as her eyes are glued to the screen, counting along with the hosts for the ball drop meanwhile you're too enamored with her to look anywhere else, knowing you are exactly where you want to be now and want to be next New Years, and hopefully many more after that. She turns and spots your soft smile and blushes before the two of you knock your foreheads together, counting down the final 3, 2, 1, and kiss, languid and lazy and soft before breaching. You clink your glasses together, cozy back up against one another on the couch, and return to your movie. Pressing your lips to her temple, you wish her a happy new year, and as Reagan returns the favor against your collarbone, she wishes you the same.

Andre Lee

"I've never had a New Year's like this before!" You exclaim over the music, moving along with him beside you and letting him twirl you around and bring you back only to crash into him, stabilizing and getting lost in the high of the moment, and other things, as you stare at him beneath bright, glowing lights than drench Andre in rainbow hues.

"Well here's your first of many!" he shoots back, grin infectious as he giggles and squeezes at your side, stepping to the side to bring you closer to the music and standing behind you so you get the better view and he can look over your shoulder and head. "Enjoying yourself?" he says over the EDM that's blasting on the giant speakers up front, nearly as large as bikes if not cars. You nod enthusiastically, bopping along to the beat.

You take Andre's hands in yours, beaded bracelets and kandi clattering on each other's arms and wrists as you move along to the beat and feel yourself warm up even in the cold of December-turning-January, the heat of bodies warming the air up just enough to be perfect for the moment.

"That's good! Need another hit?" you shake your head no, thanking him anyway and he taps at your waist, signaling that he's going to unzip the bag at your hip, pulling out his THC pen that you decorated the other day with paint and little sticker-diamonds, making it look like Lisa Frank threw up on it.

Andre takes a hit, offers it once more to be sure you don't want any, they zips it back into your side bag before pecking the corner of your mouth affectionately, blowing the smoke away from you after holding it in for a moment. "Told you the bag was a good idea, can never hold anything in these tiny pockets." you murmur against his mouth, tasting faint flavor from the vape alongside the unwavering smell of weed, giggling against his lips.

Before he can respond, the DJ queues the countdown, and Andre jumps up and down excitedly beside you, eyes bright and glossy. "Oh I never asked," and before you can question, he kneels before you on the floor, taking your hand, and you know he's joking around but the sight still sends your heart into a frenzy, "sugar, do me the honor of being my midnight kiss?"

You laugh, pointedly mentioning that the countdown is going on as you both speak and he shakes his head, refusing to get up until you give him a formal answer. "Yes, Andre, I'll be your midnight kiss. Always." With a happy shout, he hops up to his feet and falters a moment before cupping both sides of your face between his palms and kissing you with enthusiasm, tracing the seam of your lips with his tongue as confetti rains down and the music plays, starting your New Year off just right.

Glenn Dolphman

He usually would spend New Year's eve with his daughter but she's with her mother this year. You decide to cheer him up and spend the holiday with him, appearing on his doorstep thirty minutes after ending a phone call with him after getting his update, bringing groceries from your home to his to make him food and make some new traditions you hope to share with him beyond just this year.

Glenn keeps telling you that you don't have to go to all the trouble for just him, and you continue to shrug it off in efforts to cook and care for him, shutting him up with doting, affectionate kisses in the meantime. You eventually give up and have him just sit at the kitchen counter watching as you move about, letting him help occasionally and tie the bow on the end of the apron, ignoring the warmth in your cheeks as you flush at his comment of how you look so cute in it.

"Goddamnit, just," you sigh, palms braced on the counter before you look up from the granite to him as he grins, pleased with himself, "just sit back and stop being sweet, you're killing me here." Trying to turn around, you go back to a mixing bowl of cookies and aim to reach some measuring spoons for the baking powder before you get swept up and placed atop the counter and closed in, Glenn's blunt nose knocking against yours.

"And just what do you think you're doing?" you chide, a hand on your thigh laying stagnant while the other immediately reaches for him, sprawled across his broad, solid shoulder as you feel his arms cage you in, safe and warm and secure with him surrounding you. "Testing my luck in the hopes of practicing my kiss for midnight."

You hum, brow raised as you peer up at him, looking from beneath lashes that blink doe-like. "Oh? Just like that?" Glenn nods and your hand smooths back to the hairs at the nape of his neck, tugging teasingly and pushing your own luck in the same way he is, knowing that mixing bowl's gonna' be abandoned until way later in the day, if not until late this evening.

"Alright, sarge, go on ahead, make me feel real lucky," you murmur, cupping his jaw and snaking your fingers in his hair to tug him close just so he can pull you against him and kiss you breathless, nipping at your lip tenderly in the way you taught him as not to break it, letting your legs attempt to lock around his waist. They can't even touch let alone cross at the ankle. It's safe to say those cookies don't get made until way past the countdown, and Glenn's counting off times you gush around him rather than seconds until the New Year. He likes celebrating this way far better.

Myc Celium

he doesn’t really give a shit about the New Year, mainly uses it as an excuse to get fucked up and party, but lets you have your fun, staying around at home and allowing you to press kisses across his orb and under cap gills until he’s flushed and the hues start flickering as you make him forget about the New Year while getting fresh with you.

You dress up a little and manage to get a party hat onto Myc, not without some expletives thrown your way tethered together with demeaning pet names, flagella still around your waist as you lean up on tip-toes to secure it around his cap and make sure it's not tight. He helps you stand and lifts you in order to get you higher, all the while he's calling you and your entire bloodline waste of space bastards

The two of you go about the day pretty normally, cooped up at home since there's no work party this year nor any enticing ones thrown by friends or family. The two of you just lounge about or get small tasks done around the house, display parallel play, and just do other things apart from one another while being nearby. Conversations flow occasionally and other times you can hear him on call with Andre while playing a game as you reorganize something or finally settle down to stitch those patches onto your jacket.

By the time it nears eleven, the two of you settle down for a movie, curl up with one another, greasy takeout or fast food, and watch a movie, something kitschy but classic like When Harry Met Sally. Myc constantly chimes in about how the dynamic is pretty similar to you, but he thinks he's Harry with the charm and wit when he's high maintenance enough to be Sally. You humor him and litter sticky, glitter-gloss kisses to his orb or the underside of his cap across downy-soft gills.

You had set a reminder for when it would near five minutes away from midnight just so you could give Myc a classic new year's kiss with the countdown. Timing the movie out perfectly, in a scene of fated clandestine brilliance, the final scene comes on the moment you start counting down until midnight in your head, voicing along the lines that are too sweet to ignore from Billy Crystal.

"- when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."

"Aren't you a sap?" Myc comments just as you grasp at the edge of his cap and cup the underside of his orb tenderly, leaning him down to meet you halfway as you countdown and finally reach one, murmuring happy new year against him as your lips brush his surface.

"Happy New Year, Myc." you breathe, leaning back flushed a minute later after he got handsy, feeling him nudge against you and crowd you against the corner of the couch cushions. "Happy New Year, sweets."

[daydream-cement]

Hi sorry to bother you, I was wondering if you could do Gwendoline’s characters with a non binary s/o? Also unrelated but I love your work ❤️

Gwen’s Characters With A Non-Binary SO

Authors Note: Thank you so much for requesting this! @bri-sonat wrote for Brienne and Phasma and (of course) double-checked my work as well :))

Larissa Weems

She tries not to be too invasive, but Larissa has many questions about her partner’s identity and how she can support her partner

From her work with the students, she has some experience with using new pronouns and names. She will immediately adjust to her partner’s identity. 

Larissa loves pet names and will double-check to make sure her pet names for her partner are validating and wanted.

She becomes very invested in helping her partner express themselves through their personal style and fashion. If it's wanted, she will use her abilities to help her partner test out different styles and outfits. 

In order to help with dysphoria, Larissa will provide words of affirmation and small acts of service to soothe her partner in whatever way she can.

Larissa is a wonderful confidant so if her partner isn’t out, their identity is safe with her and she will be happy to alter the way she speaks about them depending on the setting. 

She is very quick with compliments and she quickly learns to tailor them so they are genuine affirmations of her partner’s gender. 

If she has any questions about how to help her non-binary students, Larissa is quick to sit down and talk with her partner to gain another perspective. 

Larissa loves so intensely that her partner’s gender is secondary. She is happy to accommodate any changes to make them feel loved. 

Miranda Hilmarson

She is so happy for her partner when they come out to her. She is so proud of them and feels so honored to be trusted with their identity.

She definitely does a TON of research about her partner’s identity as she is worried about seeming ignorant. Post-research she has just a few more questions to make sure she fully understands. 

Miranda is not a great secret keeper but if her partner isn’t out yet, she will guard that secret with her whole being. 

In fear of misgendering her partner, Miranda will practice her partner’s pronouns (or name) in private to make sure she never gets it wrong. If she were to get it wrong, she will apologize profusely and feel terrible. 

(If her partner is out) All of Miranda’s friends will know her partner’s correct pronouns (and/or name) by the sheer amount in which she talks about her partner. She will brag about them and talk about them 24/7 at work.

Miranda loves seeing her partner in clothes so she is happy to offer up a sweatshirt or t-shirt for those dysphoric days. 

Miranda will get a small non-binary pride flag to keep in her apartment to show her partner that “my apartment is a safe space for you.”

She is very supportive (if not completely ecstatic) of her partner to try out new haircuts or styles to better represent their identity. She wants to be there for all the trips to the hairdresser or to the store just so she can be there to support all of the decisions. 

 Miranda tries to understand her partner’s gender to the best of her ability so she can send them memes, posts, and TikToks that could be funny or relatable for her partner. 

Brienne of Tarth

Considering there was no such thing as non-binary (or any form of labels, to be fair) back in Brienne’s time, it would be referred to as “genderless” by both Brienne and her partner.

When Brienne’s significant other first explained it to her and how they felt about their identity, she was a little confused but eventually understood after some questions and answers.

She’s very respectful about what she refers to her partner as and asks them what would be okay and what would not be in terms of “gendered” terms. Eventually landing in “my partner,” and “my romantic companion.”

If her partner wants to alter their name and have Brienne call them something else in private, she would be more than supportive and try her best to adjust as fast as possible. If she slips in the first few days, she feels incredibly guilty and apologizes profusely. 

If her significant other wishes to keep the new name and identity to themselves and Brienne only, she’d respect her partner’s wishes but every time someone refers to her partner by their old name or calls them a girl, she has the most challenging time holding her tongue - wanting to correct them, but she manages to keep quiet. Her respect and loyalty to her love are stronger than anything else.

When/if her partner voices a discomfort or dysphoria with their body and their feminine traits, she will observe and take notes on what she can do to help on the rougher days.

She always lets her partner wear her clothes that are far too large for them, just to offer some more affirming clothing than the ones that are tailored to their body and often show their curves.

She will offer to cut their hair if they want to go shorter or just maintain the length they currently have if it’s already short. 

She will try her best to offer any type of euphoric or affirming moment on any day, but especially the harder ones.

Every single day will she tell them how much she loves them and how much they mean to her, and how perfect they are just the way they are.

Captain Phasma

When her partner explains it to her, she doesn’t say more than: “Good for you.” 

Even if her initial reaction was very careless and crass, she does take it in and adjusts slightly in the way she thinks about them.

She will not be all lovey-dovey or gentle about it all, but she will be somewhat supportive, in her own Phasma way.

If someone misgenders her partner in her proximity, she will aggressively correct them if their partner has shared their identity with them that is. If they have not, she will not say anything, against her own invasive urges.

If her significant other wants her to call them something else, she will. It’s going to take a couple of days and she will slip, but she will eventually lock it in. Whenever she does slip up when talking to her partner, she will correct herself and move on. They won’t get an apology out of Phasma, but she wants her partner to know that she was aware of her slip-up in some way. 

If her partner is out, she will correct someone using their old name in her usual stern way, and if she slips when talking about them to someone else, (which she never will cause when she talks about them to someone else she uses their title and last name, but on the off-chance that she uses their title and first name) she will quickly correct herself and tell the other person that, “If I hear you calling them the name I accidentally used, I am going to rip your tongue out so you can never call anyone anything ever again.”

And for the more dysphoric days, she doesn’t quite know what to do. Her initial attempts don’t really work (like saying, “You’re hot.”) so she disinterestedly asks what she can do to help or “whatever.”

She ends up throwing her large shirts her partner’s way when they voice their thoughts on how they are feeling. She also silently drags them to the hairdresser if her partner so wishes for an affirming haircut.

She’s supportive in her own aggressive way.

Lucifer Morningstar

Lucifer just gets it. 

They try not to use too much of their own experience to anticipate their partner’s wants and needs, so they will have a few questions to be as responsive as possible. 

Even with their busy schedule ruling hells, they will happily sit and listen to their partner talk about their experience or challenges. There is no mercy for those who interrupt your time together. 

They would encourage their partner to be open and proud of their new identity but are supportive of their partner’s wish to not come out if they so choose - either way, Lucifer will use the correct pronouns (and/or name).

Due to Lucifer’s own non-binary identity, Hell is a place that quickly accepts changes in an individual's orientation or identity. On the odd chance that someone is not accepting of Lucifer’s partner, that daemon or being will be turned into ash with the flick of Lucifer’s wrist. 

They are delighted in helping their partner alter their appearance to feel more affirmed and will often tell their partner, “You have no need to want for anything. Whatever your heart desires, I will make it so.” 

They love to pull their partner into their lap and wrap them up in their arms when their partner is feeling more dysphoric. They will whisper sweet affirmations for a short while before asking if they could interest their partner in a walk through the gardens. 

Jane Murdstone

She doesn’t quite understand at first, only responding with “I see. Thank you for telling me.” Jane is quick to bring up the subject again later that evening or the next day as she truly had no clue what ‘non-binary’ or ‘genderless’ meant. 

It may take her a few explanations to understand fully, but she is never unaccepting or rude about her partner’s wishes. She doesn’t make a very big deal of the change and will often ask a single question and answer with an “Mhmm. Thank you.” as she internally sorts through the new information.

The Victorian era was not an accepting one so her partner’s gender will most likely be kept private along with their relationship with Jane. 

Jane wants to verbally eviscerate anyone who misgenders her partner, but chooses to silently seethe instead to avoid outing her partner in any way. 

She is very deliberate with her words and will be determined to use the correct pronouns (and/or name) whenever she has the opportunity. 

She most definitely surprises her partner with trousers and loose-fitting shirts to wear around their rooms. 

She is quick to utilize compliments that she finds to be more genderless, such as, “You are looking quite attractive today, sweeting.”

Her partner will often hear her cursing ‘the latest fashion trends’ and how they are ‘quite repressive and reprehensible’ as the fashion of the day was designed to accentuate women’s curves. 

Jane loves to read her partner poetry or novels and will often change the pronouns of the love interest just for them. 

Taglist: @charymobile, @ihavenoclue2008, @opheliauniverse, @alex-nyx, @renravens, @whenyouhaveanobsession, @scream-queenlover, @shyladyfan, @rubberduckiesbathing, @mcufanisme, @peanutbutterprincess, @lvinhs, @myzzjolanda, @brienneswife, @dumbasslesbi, @kay-liah-scope, @kimiinou, @sweetderacine, @giogwensversion, @gela123, @thevillagegay, @naomi-m3ndez, @mysaviorfalsegod

[thelittlepinkwitchblog]

THE SEAGULLS OF WATERDEEP - A ONESHOT

First off, hello I am not dead just inactive.

I don't usually post much of my writing but here I am, and I'll be 100% honest, this idea has been bouncing around my brain since i made that initial post I dont know when (idk how to link posts but its there somewhere), about the Seagulls of Aberdeen by Scottish comedy group Weegie Hink Ae That? With respect to the source of my setting (the person whose story has me in a vice grip), this one-shot takes place in sort of the “in-between-scenes” of a story like @galebrainrot2024 ‘s on-going series, a former school rivals to friends to more (?) Kind of story. Come into my mind scape, where Tav went to Blackstaff with Gale as kids, they were rivals, and for whatever reason Tav went on to multiclass as a Sorcerer-Bard in order to make a better living or fulfill a passion or whatever, I didn't really think about that until I'm literally writing this intro thing. I like my Tav being F personally but I wrote this as an genderless Tav so I hope everyone can enjoy ^_^

Setting - the party camps in a relatively safe area for the night, allowing everyone to relax a bit from the Ilithid problem, along with the array of personal quests to be fulfilled. Gale made a hearty stew and everyone decided that they should have a little bit of wine as a treat for their weeks of steady hard work. Karlach was the first companion found by Tav after the crash, and so she requested a song the bard had played before meeting the rest of the party. Takes place after the meeting with Elminster.

***

“Oh, oh, sing that funny one about the seagulls!” Karlach almost vibrated from excitement, the heat of her skin radiating more than the well tended campfire. Tav looked around, at the reactions of their companions. Halsin and Wyll both nodded at them encouragingly, Astarion shrugged nonchalantly. Gale had been quiet for days, as quiet as one could expect from him; ever since Elminster quelled the orb with Mystra's blessing, so that he could, well, never mind. Tav observed him as he ran his fingers over the hem of his purple linen chemise, a silent glimpse into the torrent of his mind. “You'll love this one wizard, it's about your home turf.” Having caught on to her friend's gaze, the teifling deliberately brought the wizard from his thoughts and into the circle of conversation.

“Honestly, I would love to hear it.” He did his best to smile, to seem like his usual self, but Tav could see a forlornness deal within his eyes, having taken root in his heart since the orb was silenced.

“Yes, Tav. Do indulge us.” Shadowheart added, taking another sip of wine.

Tav waved their hand, silently summoning a lute with their Bardic Arcana, an act of casual magic that made Gale's heart skip, though for a moment he thought it was the now slumbering orb. Checking the tune with a single strum across the cords, Tav's lips curled into a cat's grin, obviously pleased to have been asked to provide entertainment during their rest. “Alrighty then, if you know the words, sing along.” Playing a simple intro, Tav began to sing, their accent, what dear readers would recognize as Scottish, clearly audible. “Oh the seagulls o'er in Waterdeep, have you seen the fucking size of the seagulls in Waterdeep?” Expecting a ballad that was aforementioned funny, Gale surprised himself when he burst out laughing with everyone else after the first crass line.

“Oh the seagulls o'er in Waterdeep, I watched one fight a granny at the Harbour in Waterdeep.”

Karlach joined into a rough harmony, Tav altering their pitch to accommodate the joyful teifling. “I thought I must be Water-dreamin’ up I wasnae, the big ol' bastard's devil eyes staring right through me. I thought I must be Water-dreamin’ but I wasnae, the big ol’ bastard chased me down and tried to kill me.” Shadowheart, Wyll, and Halsin all joined in with the chorus, Astarion enjoyed the spectacle too much to join, Lae'zel had left to train, and Gale was too busy marveling at how easily Tav smoothed over any friction that may have arisen during the day; any disagreement or tension between comrades was quickly forgiven or forgotten the moment they sat by the fire with their lute and vocal chords. As the bridge came and Tav's voice easily shifted higher, their eyes met for a single moment before the bard turned to Karlach, saying something quickly between verses. “Oh the seagulls o'er in Waterdeep they scream. Karlach, make the seagulls noise! Oh the seagulls o'er in Waterdeep they scream,”

“Wawa wawawa wawawa wawawawa!” With her whole chest, Karlach did her best seagull impression, flapping her hands to imitate wings.

“Oh the seagulls o'er in Waterdeep they scream,”

“Wawa wawawa wawawa wawawawa!” Shadowheart had joined Karlach's impression, her cheeks red from the wine most of them had consumed with the dinner Gale had prepared.

“Oh the seagulls o'er in Waterdeep,” Slowing the tempo, none knew the final line the Bard would deliver, the final blow to a song that almost had tears of laughter flow. “I watched one bust a nut at the Harbour in Waterdeep.” Shaking his head as Tav flourished on the lute in finality, he struggled for breath as his fingers clasped the bridge of his nose.

A moment of applause rang through the clearing as Tav said their thanks and seemed to humbly accept whatever praise or criticism came their way. Though no complement could surpass Gale’s; Tav's heart swelled almost painfully at his breathy laughs as he muttered to himself with a half smile, almost hiding his face in his hand to suppress himself. “Oh sweet Gods above, I needed that.”

***

please be kind to me with criticisms, be constructive but I'm sensitive k thanks

Okay, I love you, Gods bless ♡ bye ♡

[mushiemellows]

You mentioned you had some tricks to better write brook? Did you mind sharing?

Tbh brook is still pretty tricky for me, I've only given him one attempt, and that was mostly uhhhh well if you know the brook fic you know. It is what it is. Here's how I prioritize the flow of words when I write from brook's pov:

Like Franky, Brook is an Isolation Monster. You're gonna close your eyes and put yourself back in like Winter 2020. Lose it a little bit. He talks to himself, and he talks to himself narratively. He offers his comments, he is actively internally commentating. He's telling this story to himself, not an outside reader. Blur them lines.

He is a gentleman before he's a perv. He's sweet, he's old fashioned, he's a boundary-less idiot, but in an old man way.

He thinks in music. I looooooove giving him a music metaphor. The comment I had about learning a lot from writing brook, I was thinking about because I've been writing Sanji this week. I realized I can lean on a similar instinct and focus a bit on Sanji thinking in food. Process, time, senses, courses, construction, etc. Brook's similar, so I did work to tie what I was writing about sex with music. Those are two of the most interconnected human sensations. Drums, tempo, instruments, volume, the sensation of playing, the sensation of listening. I do a lot of word association work when I set up my more metaphor heavy sections, and you have to be unafraid to take a metaphor two or three steps beyond the first association.

He is easily awed. It's the simple things that make him sit back and go "My goodness, how lovely." Brook (like, admitedly, Sanji) has a complex relationship to Lack and Desire. The longer he has been without, the more he treasures what he has. He Wants, but he doesn't want huge things. He wants friends, he wants contact, he wants a glass of milk.

THe fact that he asks to see big mom's panties is the most radical thing anyone has ever dared to vocalize in the entire series. This is key to his character. He is a Whore, but all he has are those gosh darn Pelvis Bones. He is genderless. He is bisexual.

when in doubt go Peepaw Mode. Oh peepaw, at it again. You're so funny peepaw. He probably Grandpappy Sneezes. He'll ask anyone to sit on his lap even tho there's no way you could. I'm begging him to pick up knitting.

[quietwingsinthesky]

destiel and wincest for the ship ask game :))

destiel

you know, what could have been an interesting ship has been so thoroughly destroyed by bland fanon and overrunning the website with it that my only reaction is Shut The Fuck Up. you know how people have taken saying “read any other book” to harry potter fans? Discuss Any Other Ship. the only people who should be allowed to still talk about destiel are the people who are properly freaks about it.

i pray every day that a supernatural revival brings castiel back played by a woman and that’s the only way reciprocal destiel happens. i think that would be hilarious. i would love to watch a bunch of people who are so proud of themselves for shipping this Revolutionary Queer Ship™️ stumble and fall on their faces if it worked out like that. i guarantee you no one would care that Cas has always been technically canonically genderless the whole time. how do i put it. people could hallucinate a whole finale they were denied for that gay angel when he was shaped like the man they were attracted to. they wouldn’t bother to put any amount of effort into embracing it as still being a queer narrative if cas took the body of a woman, nevermind that if that did happen, it would be arguably even more queer then before. can’t hit a character with the transfem beam just to make the ship “straight” without making everything else a lot more funky around it! but it is very obvious to me, given the disconnect between what’s in the show and what people claim about destiel, that the majority of investment has very little to do with the characters themselves and a lot more to do with the attractiveness of their male actors.

wincest

so anyway, you know how everything im annoyed with about destiel is about how there’s not much investment in the show itself or its themes or the characters beyond how they serve to further a ship? so like. having been in both circles. wincest isn’t like that. there’s people who annoy the fuck out of me in wincest circles, who i think have awful takes or are just assholes, because that’s how being a fandom is. but like. at least they do the reading, you know? the thing about supernatural, and if you’re someone who has followed me only since i started doccy whoing and only knows about spn through tumblr/destiel osmosis, i’m either sorry to inform you and/or delighted to tell you, the thing about supernatural is that it’s about incest. i’m not trying to do a shipping gotcha, i’m not being competitive about who is more canon here. incest is in the text. eric kripke did not fight the network to have mary winchester kiss her father on the mouth to sell sam’s soul to the demon who would later infect his blood with a curse he could never scrub out for people to pretend like this show isn’t about incest. they reference it in the show by name multiple times when talking about the in-universe fandom of the winchester brothers. this is what the show is about. (which. the fact that this isn’t just common knowledge and people unfamiliar with the fandom know more about destiel is so funny to me. no one goes up to game of thrones and tries to say it isn’t kicked into motion because of jaime and cersei fucking and is instead about the love story of bronn and jaime.)

it’s one thing not to engage with it out of discomfort, i understand that, one of my friends doesn’t because that themes genuinely makes him nauseous. but like. that’s what the show is about. it’s about sam and dean’s codependence and how it destroys them and every relationship they have with the people around them. its about how there’s still a core of love so powerful it can beat the devil even surrounded by all that sickness and abuse. the show never stops being about sam and dean. the center was always meant to be “family is hell.”

so what i’m saying is. i vibe with wincest a hell of a lot. this is a theme that i love. i’m a little freak who likes when gothic horror is about two siblings holding on too tight when the house crumbles down on top of them. i love that the show goes hard on placing sam and dean as brothers being on the same level or above their romantic entanglements. and like. also incest kink. but mostly, i find engaging with the text of the show from a wincest lines fascinating, because it isn’t about fighting the show as it is to get the narrative you want. it’s about interpreting what was laid out for you, on purpose.

like. the way i see the great fandom war between these two ships is: you can either look at Sex and Violence and say ‘oh this is proof dean is into dudes and also cas because the siren sort of looks like cas’ or you can say ‘the siren literally word for word says that he lured dean in by playing along as the little brother that dean needs right now as he feels sam slipping away from him and choosing ruby instead.’

wincest wins. it’s in the name.

[put any ship in my ask box and i’ll give my brutally honest opinion]

[aftonsparv-bugzz]

:33 < velop ! this is a little info on the 4th person neopronoun flag, coined by ve !! ^_^

:33 < 4th person neopronouns are neopronouns to be used instead of we/us/our/ours (‼️it is important to note that the pronouns yall will use must be decided by both/all of you, as you will be using those pronouns together and yall may as well pick something nice and shared(or if the other person dosent mind and lets you decide, or other way around, thats fine too. as long as its agreed upon‼️))

:33 < this can be use by couples/people in relationships, friends and siblings/family

:33 < "but how do you use that ?? wouldnt that be over complicated for no reason ?" to that vi say, why NOT over complicate it ?? why NOT confuse people for the sake of it ?? its funny.

:33 < anyways, the flag above shows the flag for 4th person neopronouns !!

:33 < the flag colours meanings:

:33 < light green: masc identifying people who use 4th person neos

:33 < light blue: equal decision making and enjoying/embracing your 4th person neopronouns

:33 < light grey/teal: 2pp neopronoun inclusivity/representation

:33 < white: togetherness, unity and representation for all neopronoun users

:33 < purple: 1pp neopronoun inclusivity/representation and nonbinary/genderless identifying people who use 4th person pronouns !!

:33 < yellow: positivity and co operation between the people using these pronouns

:33 < pink: fem-identitying people who use 4th person neopronouns !!

:33 < here are some examples of pronouns yall can use: !!

non themed:

•vus/vee/vour

•xus/xee/xour

•aeus/aeem/aeour

•faeus/faeum/faeour

•perus/perum/perour

•huus/humum/huour

•zus/zee/zour

•rus/ree/rour

•thonus/thonee/thonour

•zaeus/zaee/zaeour

•cous/cowe/coour

and any other non themed you can think of !! remember, these are yalls pronouns and nobody can dictate you on how they should be like/what they should be. it dosent have to make sense to others. only you

themed pronouns !!

•voius/voiwe/voidour (void)

•spaceus/spacee/spaceour (space)

•(tw !!‼️‼️mention of g0re !! please dont read if you're sensitive to that !!) goreus/goree/goreours (gore)

•spirus/spirwee/spirour (spirals !)

•clownus/clownee/clownours (clowns)

:33 < and anything else you can think of !! (vi cant be asked to type up any more😭😭‼️) make up your own !! go crazy !! you dont have to use these, theyre just examples !!

:33 < a quick example on how to use these neopronouns for those who sre confused:

:33 < "me and my best friend went to the shop ! vee got some sweets !" (instead of "we" its "vee" !! ^_^)

:33 < "wanna come eat with spaceus ?" (instead of "us", its "spaceus !!")

:33 < if you are a neopronoun blog, please repost this to spread this !! /nf vi would really love all the help vi can get ^_^ (any type of blog can repost this though ^_^/nf)

B33 < tagging: @io-archival (dont know who else to tag) (feel free to ignore ^_^)

:33 < we dont gatekeep pronouns around here <3

[necronatural]

Yaoi Essay: It was Ice Age Okay

My friend @tshirt3000 organized a friend zine where we talk about yaoi that was formative to us. It's a sizeable 80 pages, and you can read everyone's formative yaois in the digital copy here.

My essay was written in a single night and primarily primes you to pattern-seek so you can see my vision. My divine truth.

Before I speak, I need to prime you with the knowledge that you understand me. Even if you think you don’t, you actually do. So.

In seminal AO3 fandombait television program Teen Wolf (2011), the main point of fascination is Stiles Stilinski; a doe-eyed ADHD obsessive who chases his every thought with a frenetic intensity that often steals the scene he’s in.

Stiles being a fascinating little creature means that people want to ship him. I’d say he has three main people to do that with, and the big ship on campus was none of them. It was practically mandatory to ship him with Derek, the dark, brooding werewolf anti-hero.

I don’t think the suffocating pervasiveness of this ship is really that deep. Derek is a sexy paranormal tall dark and handsome boytoy. I’ve never seen the Vampire Diaries but I’m sure he wouldn’t be out of place in the cast. And hey, everybody is already obsessed with Stiles. I don’t think people actually care about the text of the show, just the pretty men they’re fixated on. The shit they made in their heads is so obviously just a gay version of every romance ever at the time.

But there is a secret recipe at play. Because in 2011, alongside Teen Wolf, a film was released. It was called Thor. You know, from the MCU? In Thor, the titular character’s treacherous baby brother (adopted) imprisons Thor on earth to steal his position. On Earth, Thor meets the love of his life, her father, and a zany bit character added for comedic relief. 

Now I love Loki an abnormal amount for someone who cares as little about the MCU as I do. I love pathetic men and pathetic villains. As an avid fanfiction reader, I spent a lot of time trawling AO3 for Loki content, realizing they don’t think he’s pathetic, and clicking away. And over the years, I began seeing a weird pattern. Loki/Darcy. The comic relief girl. Her quirky antics were somehow enough to warrant a ship in a fandom that only blows up mandatory Two White Guys couples. And Loki is clearly NOT a brooding paranormal romance boy, but the ship had that Sterek stink on it anyway. A lot of it.

It seemed so mysterious, yet I remember, now, that Sterek wasn’t just popular with paranormal romance swooners, but people who just like funny ships. A zany idiot tormenting that brooding villain. A genderless mass appeal. An Entrapta and Hordak. The raw impulse for Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint readers to pair Kim Dokja and Yoo Joonghyeok before they started developing any chemistry at all, simply by nature of the kinds of characters they are. 

Okay. Listen man. I need to talk to you about Ice Age.

If you’re unfamiliar, Ice Age is about a cynical mammoth named Manford taking a great southern migration as a chance to be alone. When he rescues criminally annoying sloth Sid, he’s forced to share his newfound alone time with him. He is not happy. Meanwhile, a pack of sabertooth tigers is on a vengeance quest against the humans who hunt them by eating their tribe leader’s baby. One of them, Diego, accidentally lets the human mother jump off a waterfall to escape, delivering the baby downriver to Manny and Sid. Diego presents himself as a tracker who can hunt the humans down, and the three of them decide to travel together to bring the baby back to the humans, one way or another.

I will be clear; the homoeroticism exists, and it exists between Manny and Sid. The chemistry exists, and it exists between Manny and Diego. Manny is the heart of the film. And I don’t care. Baby’s First Yaoi, the thing that really boiled my brain, was Diego’s extremely intimate threats to Sid’s life and Sid baiting him like a barking dog. I’m sorry.

The film never really stops insisting that Sid is genuinely annoying — it starts with his entire family leaving him behind and ends with him being kind of a fuckup too — but he’s key to the synergy regardless. There’s no great moment that announces ‘well maybe they weren’t seeing Sid’s true value!’ because he doesn’t have any. He’s a lazy, annoying, unempathetic, impulsive, smug little womanizer. He never learns. The film proposes that well, he doesn’t really have to— Manny is a deeply isolated person (mammoth?) who drives people away, and he needs someone who’s annoying and can’t understand boundaries to teach him to open up again. No matter how much he swats Sid back, Sid is confident in their friendship. Just like how no matter how many times Sid’s family abandoned him, he still went looking for them. They are lonely people, and Sid being an obnoxious little pissant forces them together.

On the other hand, I can’t imagine a film with just Manny and Diego. They get along well and have a great rapport, with Diego’s bad boy fun uncle attitude and Manny’s asshole with a heart of gold routine. But the thing is that they are two dudes who mind their own business. They are only casually uniting, and Diego is only doing it so his pack of evil sabertooths can eat the baby. The warmth of friendship doesn’t exist, and it has to bleed from Sid terrorizing them. They need their idiot to unite against. And since they don’t actually dislike Sid, it can only become camaraderie.

Diego is aware Manny is a smart guy and will take any threat extremely seriously, but he acts like himself from the beginning with Sid. After a while, it becomes clear Manny doesn’t care if he threatens Sid — because Sid is annoying, and he himself has threatened Sid plenty of times — but he also doesn’t intend to leave Sid alone where he can get hurt. Diego is 100% serious, but after a certain point he finds his own threats also becoming empty teasing. By the end of the movie, he’s openly endeared and friendly. He gives death threats like he gives a noogie. 

There is something so unreal, to be honest, about forcing a born killer to hold you in his teeth after he repeatedly threatened to kill you, and him holding you there against your will because he thinks it is so funny.

Diego’s heel-face turn is obviously inspired by Manny, but over the course of the film, it’s clear that he, too, was lonely, and he, too, benefits from an extremely annoying person filling his loner life. His pack is dog-eat-dog, ready to abandon him if he doesn’t do his job, but Manny is willing to die for him, and — this is key to my childhood brain — Sid trusts him unconditionally despite doing nothing to earn it. Sid would follow Diego all year if he suddenly abandoned him for migration. He is just that kind of person.

That’s the secret recipe. What made Sterek mandatory even for people who have no interest in paranormal romance hunks. Why Darcy was thrown at Loki. This underlying vein of True Yaoi, of a dynamic based less on actual relationship and more on the core of the kind of people they are, and the kind of synthesis that is possible between those two ingredients. The zany idiot and the villain have this chemical reaction you could see from space. TO ME!

You need a zany person to do a whole lot of impulsive shit, and you need that zany person to be stupid enough to not notice they’re unwanted, or in danger, or that their dynamic is shifting, or the subtext of anyone’s behaviour. You need the person tormented to be a genuine threat, and they need to not melt, but be worn down. The simple pleasures of having your day-to-day life filled with life and noise, your every interaction with the world commented on, to the point you allow yourself to be defanged.

Sid does this to Manny, sure but it didn’t click even with the gay jokes because Manny is a kind, caring Dad Friend kind of guy who would fold for anyone. Diego is a fucking baby-eating tiger. But he trusts Manny, and Manny is endeared and receptive to Sid’s constant noise because he is lonely, and because of that, Diego, who is also lonely, allows himself to be endeared too. He had Sid’s throat in his mouth, and all he thought was that it was a funny thing to do.

My friend Hyde tagged me in this post.

[svsaskbox]

Hello everyone!

Welcome to the SVS ask box! We are a small group of SVS members/creators where you can ask our OCs all sorts of questions!

here's an introduction to all the individuals behind this blog:

@bamjammy - Hi! My name's Jammy, pronouns he/they, and I like to make OCs and never use 'em!

available characters:

Tarty Hart - Evil scientist smarties

Wizz Fizzy - chaotic pixy stix

Teri Chang - famous sour(?) singer/actress

Valentina Velvet - red velvet cake killer/bakery owner

Carolina Carrot - carrot cake detective

Toast - innocent marshmallow taffy kid/Tarty's somewhat son

@toastygal666 - a gal whos toasty, with only girl OCs cause men are hard to draw :>

available characters:

Delicie - jawbreaker girl

Hecate - pumpkin witch

Vemp - vampire mermaid

@jynxiejinx - I’m Jynxie! I’m a 19 y/o character artist, and your local chill hippie enby. any pronouns are cool!

available characters:

Penny Sucre - peach tea fruity guild leader

Bianca, Barry and Huey Poppins - bubblegum triplets

Fable Frosting - mythical animal cracker unicorn centaur

@kitn3x - Hi hi, I’m Kit, your genderless fool of an artist!

available characters:

Paddie (Rainbow paddlepop ice cream) - sweet local robin hood who eat the rich and feed the poor situation

Milly (Milo nuggets) - a bittersweet member who dream of becoming a mechanic

Bannie (Bandung drink) - A sweet singer who dream of peace between sweet and sour nation through music with her fellow friends and members

Hex (Sparkling honey drink) - ur avg waiter who works in a honey pot tavern in coco cabins

Isbert (Ice shaved dessert) - An ex-knight who now works as a lumberjack to take care of his remaining family member and ensure there's no harm on them

Peps (Hot cocoa Pepsi) - Shark boi who friends with a sweet and dreamt of becoming a famous swimmer

Aurora (galaxy cocktail) - Once a child actor, now a pop singer in the sour nation! She have fallen in love with a famous sweet underground singer

Killian (c1000 drink) - William Fishbert's beloved husband who works in a military with him before the incident :)

Aiden (hot hot pop foot lollipop) - Father of a certain shark boi who works as a bartender at Gobstop! Also his appearance may scare you if its a curse thing or bless you or maybe blursed

@seanthejester - Hi! I'm Sean (he/him)! I'm 19 years old and like drawing silly little guys.

Available characters:

Brandy Butter - He was almost the pastry guild leader and he's all about advocating for peace and integration. He's currently working on creating a peace organization in the Sweet Kingdom

@minibigboy - I’m Fin / MiniShark (he/it). I’m a bit funkee and tired, but I have art and ocs :)

available characters:

Ananas - piña colada

Lucius Sandía - watermelon flash pop

Angel Cake - …angel cake…

Girlypop - sour rainbow strips

William Fishbert - the fishbowl

Joe Cupp - black coffee

@jacket-pigeon - Hi! I'm Pigeon (they/them) and I like making OCs too much

available characters:

Pomelia (Peppermint) - Grumpy ex-soldier

Moxy (Bubblegum poprocks) - Playful troublemaker

Jambo (Sour belts) - Eccentric TV show host

@itayati - Hey! I'm a 19 yo artist (she/her) and an enjoyer of cute things and the colour pink

available characters:

Pea O'Sour (Peach sour rings) - Cheerful photographer

Minty Drop (Mint drops/landrines) - Quiet jewellery maker

Malina (pierogi with blueberries and strawberries) - a bit socially awkward fruit seller

@ikeaunderscorecat - Yo, im ikea (she/they) and i am here also! hopefully you enjoy my funny fellows as much as i do

available characters:

hedron - red velvet oreo, very angry arms guy

@asrielcipher - Hey I’m Ace (they/them), please enjoy my ocs

available characters:

Bea Flutters (Butterfly Pea Tea) - a doctor with no self preservation, who wants to help others at her own expence

Moon Flutters (Ramune) - an influencer and Bea’s younger, meaner sister

[intrepidradish]

Media: Farscape

Year/my age: 2019/29

This one is going to be enormous. Cant' be helped.

What drew me to the media:

Sometime in 2017, the boyfriend, later husband, was watching a show called Farscape. We lived in a different states. He was really enjoying it, and I wasn't in the mindset to watch a show. I was trying to watch Star Trek the Next Generation and was failing miserably. He said I should watch Farscape instead, and I don't take show suggestions because I'm a stubborn jackass that likes to be an enigma. Classic Classic. Nothing has changed. I did not watch Farscape.

Fast forward two years, I'm in a pit of despair because I can't watch anymore Dr. Who. I finished the reboot material, don't want to go back to the earlier Whos and can't afford the Jodi Whittaker's on prime. I'm lightly sobbing (because I'm a lil baby) about needing a new show that is both funny, campy, and also trauma inducing. Once again the boyfriend is like "dude, watch Farscape." and I'm like "no, no. I'm not going to watch the muppets-in-space show."

We all know how this ends.

OKAY BUT SEASON 1! John Crichton! Aeryn Sun! The MAKEUP! The Props! The SETS! The Muppets!

I'm engaged, you know, I'm there watching.

I think early season John Crichton is yaknow... he's an arc type of a white guy in space. He was on top of the spaghetti on Earth being a cis straight guy, kind of a bro. He's got that solid mix vibe of both your quarterback from highschool but is smart enough to also be your biology tutor. He's got a heart of gold. He's going to stand up for the nerd getting the toilet swirly.

He's an arc type we see a LOT in science fiction, and the normal route for these kinds of dudes is they get in an unfamiliar environment and take over. Since I was worried that was going to be his trajectory, I was a little more skeptical of him from the start.

What is really refreshing about Farscape right out of the gate is that John Crichton is off kilter. He does not get in and take *anything* over. His unfamiliarity with the situation constantly is a disservice to himself and others despite trying to get on top of it, he can't. His heart of gold does win him a few friends though. Even though they all think he's nuts, which he is, and definitely is going to get crazier.

Anyway for the next 18 episodes, hour long apiece (its also crazy that seasons used to be 26 episodes, the 90s were blessed), I was happily invested in watching a man screw up a lot but also save the day. I love plots that revolve around a HUGE misunderstanding, because that's what motivates the plot for most of season 1.

What made me a fan:

Look, to defend myself here before we even get into it, I'm kind of a strange person. I look very 'cute woman', I'm dominantly tall for being only 5'9." I have blue eyes and dark hair, and weirdish teeth that makes a great smile. If you put me in a room with other people, I can be very charming. However, if you put me in sweats alone at home, I transform into a monster; a genderless, venomous freak that wants to eat raw meat, claw at dirt, and spit at people.

Inside, I am a freakish goblin person.

I've come to terms with this.*

(*she had, in fact, not come to terms with this in 2019)

I find it really funny that a lot of people are attracted to media because characters resonant with them. This very rarely happens to me. I can pick little bits of pieces of this character or that character that I like, but it's always me *liking* a character, not me relating to one. People generally don't put freakish goblin characters in shows. It's not like... a common character to make for a show, or book, or movie, or for anything for that matter.

Shocking to me, Farscape introduces a freakish goblin character late in season 1. Scorpius shows up.

'Neat' doesn't really cover it.

You know, it really is so nice to be represented for once in media. It really feels pretty great. Why yes, I am both that strange alien lizard man and why yes, I also want to rail him. That's the trans identity in a nutshell.

What did Hannibal Lector say to Clarice in Silence of the Lambs

"First, you have to covet. And how do you being to covet, Clarice?"

"You covet what you see everyday."

Right, I'm getting off track and poetic.

This is the first time I got interested in a media not for a ship but because of a single character. Scorpius is interesting enough on his own. He doesn't need someone to fix him or complete him. I want to take him in my hands, hold him, and then free him in every single animal enclosure just to watch what he does. And that *chef's kiss* is the perfect character, no ship needed.

Why do I like Scorpius?

I'm so glad you asked!

One. Look at him. He's a lizard man. He's got a weird bdsm outfit. He's got liquid latex pants, a codpiece, and an impish false tail (which doesn't get captured enough on video in the show's lighting). He's not ripped, he has a nice belly (belly.) He's got a cowl for fuck's sake. Also what's the deal with his gstring face mask? His gray pallor. His dark lips. His sharp teeth. But then they left his very human blue eyes. Love that. Apparently they thought about giving him lizard eye contacts and I'm so glad they didn't. He's great! He looks great. Moving on.

Two. He also has a great voice. I love creature actors! They have all this latex on their face, so their mobility for expression goes way down. But the greats always have fantastic voices. Doug Jones! Armin Shimmerman! Iggy pop (lols)! One of my fav things to do to introduce the character is send people the first torture scene, and Scorp has this liquid smooth, soft voice. LIKE SHUT UP. I'm sorry I'm a voice slut, but I am. He sounds great. He sounds like a ASMR whisper video that could put me to sleep.

Three. Harvey. Harvey is the head clone Scorpius put inside John Crichton. He's actually...more of my favorite... than Scorpius. (Ah!) Mostly because he's so fucking funny. And eventually, I got into the mind set that they are two sides of the same coin. That in order to understand Scorpius, you need to understand Harvey. And only when you sync the two, you get the whole man. Scorpius doesn't say a lot. Harvey says too much. You need both of them to understand.

Four. He's disabled. He has a genetic disorder. He suffers from chronic pain. If he gets too hot, he experiences excruciating pain. He's come up with a weird way to deal with it: a temperature suit and a giant cooling rod inserted in his brain. The cooling rod eventually craps out and he gets too hot again. His body regularly tries to kill him. It might be giving him brain damage.

Five. He is obsessed and stubborn and difficult and determined and willing to do anything. He has no allegiances (but he's also pretty nice to the people that work for him). He's motivated solely because he thinks it's the most efficient way to save the galaxy. (Don't worry, it's also a self-invested decision. He's still a bad boy.) Unfortunately, he thinks he'll need to commit genocide. He's wrong, but that makes him even better.

Six. He's smart, but not too smart. He makes mistakes. Season 3 is probably my favorite season, because that crushing finale. Lord.

Seven. He's a product of his upbringing, which was fucking shitty. He's ultimately an underdog. Ah! Yeah Season 3 Incubator! I honestly think Season 3 is the Scorpius season. It was the season they made him empathetic to the audience. He's a rape baby. He's a science experiment! He's not even a very good one. He's probably the only one that survived. He's alone in the universe. FUCKING ROUGH.

Eight. John Crichton will never forgive him. FUCK. This is one of my favorite plot points. Their entire relationship is just so shitty. John snuck into a Peacekeeper base as a Sebaccean. Scorpius, literally walking by him, knew he was lying, and captures him for torture to discover why he's breaking into a PK base. Because John is there for his then girlfriend, John tries to hide it. Quite separately, Scorpius see all his information about Wormholes, and is like 'huh that's a good way to destroy an entire race. tell me more.' Scorpius cares so little about John's stupid girlfriend, that she accidentally gets killed, and yaknow, being a smart dude, tags his catch and release with a clone brain chip. (As you do. It's completely understandable.) Unfortunately, the brain clone makes John go crazy for an entire season and kill his second girlfriend. JEEZ.

I might be misremembering things. I'm sort of on Scorpius's side at this point. It's been four years.

THE POINT IS. The entire thing is a HUGE MISUNDERSTANDING again. Like John doesn't have the info Scorpius wants out of the gate. Scorpius wasn't even supposed to be torturing him. It's shitty KISMET. They are on opposite sides for no reason! (it's almost star crossed lovers) Because of how John enjoys Harvey towards the end of their run, these two guys could've been friends. And that's a tragedy. To me. This person that watched a show and enjoyed it.

Nine. This guy looks like a KINKY FUCK and HE IS. I honestly thought when he first showed up they were going to neuter him. I'm too used to disney villains obviously. I was like 'oh...right, gimp man. he is going to be slowly deprived of every ounce of sex appeal like an orange in a juicer. they can't allow that thing to be sexy. it goes against the very integrity of expected normal television' BUT THEN THEY DIDN'T. He is every ounce the kinky fuck you want him to be the entire show. Including sucking blood off John's finger. Licking Meeklo Braca's face. Wearing a dog collar and drinking out of a bowl. Eating food weird. And literally having sex. He also moans when he's in pain. It all makes me feel pretty electric, and disgusted. I love it.

Ten. He wins. yup. 'nough said.

Have I written fanfiction for it? Why or why not?

You bet your ass I have. In the year of our lord 2019 having just been godsmacked by a character I strangely related to, I had to write some fanfiction. I was actually pretty confused about what I adored about Scorpius at the time. Since its a twenty year old fandom, I expected to uncover a treasure trove of other people already dealing with the same shit I was going through.

Like what's the deal with this hot lizard man? What kind of wicked sex he be having? What's his damage with John? How many different ways do they do the nasty to deal with their tension?

Surprisingly, the fandom did not deliver on these questions. Either, it was the 90s-00s and like...the nonbinary trans gay agenda wasn't really a concern for the founding show of a new tv network or a lot of the gay was lost in the fanfiction.net purge or the internet had changed just too damn much (forums didn't last 20 years).

Instead, I ran into a lot of fanfiction stories that didn't talk about his sexuality at all or made him into a huge rapist but didn't like...actually talk about rape or abuse or question any of that. I read the rape ones because I don't have a lot of options, but I was a bit irritated right. (Admittedly, I'm projecting on a weird lizard man, so I probably shouldn't get too bent out of shape about it. But I do. Meh.)

The first two stories I wrote, are definitely me trying to figure out something about my own sexuality vis a vis a weird lizard man. I entered with Harvey, because he was easier to grapple with.

Moments in Multitudes is just... so weird. But mind palaces are some of my favorite tropes.

Black Mirror was originally only 3 chapters long, but I expanded it when I was writing Far Horizon (the more plot driven story) because I was horny.

They are both weird stories. I think chapter 2 and 3 of Black Mirror are some of the best writing I did for the fandom. Too bad they are hidden in a no-touchy kink exploration of two characters that are the same person in a mental space. Ooooops.

Ultimately, I was writing for myself, and using a story to address my own approach to the monstrous.

I read this great article at the time.

It's a great article about identity and action. A person's identity has nothing to do with how they behave or how they are perceived.

But I also really liked this article's breakdown that desire and disgust live on the same spectrum. It's why men that claim to love women are also disgusted with their sexuality, bodies, and their sex.

I'm a cerebral person, so I needed more understanding of why Scorpius, a character that makes me a little wigged out, is something I'm also very attracted to. Fascinating stuff.

Around the time I was writing Scorpius like this, I also got a really wicked intense crush on a femme nonbinary person. Yay. Coming to terms with being bisexual. Thanks Scorp!

I don't have much to say about Far Horizon. It wasn't supposed to be horny, but some scenes don't leave a person alone. I sometimes think about taking out the masturbation scene, since the story can standalone without it. But meh.

Like I said before, I was writing for myself, and I very much enjoy rereading these stories.

Exceptional is one of my favorite stories I've written. It's very full circle of my exploration of Scorp. It's about his mom issues (but secretly) but it's also more about an OC than Scorp himself. I don't understand why people click this story but don't kudos it. It constantly makes me sad. Maybe it's too long. Maybe the sex scenes are too perverse. Maybe I humanized Scorp too much. Maybe the writing is actually bad. Maybe Natalia isn't likeable enough. I have no idea. I love this story though.

I think about scratching the serials off to try to market it, but without Scorp as an existing character in an existing universe, I don't think it works as well.

Opinion on the fandom:

Confusing! I found this show at the wrong time. The old guard is off living their lives. The young guard is like ten years younger than me. It's a very quiet fandom.

The best part is I found Iterations from posting on Ao3, and she supported me as a friend through the pandemic. She dragged my ass into predators (which I'll talk about shortly. It was awful lols) We collaborated on a predators story. We were writing partners for a year or two.

Getting blocked by an artist I really enjoyed was awful too. I don't think I've ever been blocked by someone I wanted to interact with before. It was the first time I was aware of being blocked in my entire existence on the internet!

It's strange because Farscape is SO HORNY. But I want to write the WRONG HORNY.

Like not a lot of people enjoyed Exceptional based on the kudos, but during the time I was taking over the Farscape tag for 26 consecutive weeks, there were SO MANY HORNY SCORPIUS STORIES. I like to think that my story inspired a lot of people. I have to go find it but the Daddy Scorp/Little John was WILD. Someone wrote about the scarran blood pact. We got the insane watersports story. We got the BUG SOUNDING DEAD DOVE. It was a fucking buffet of perverted Scorp stories.

And I remember someone in the midst of this buffet published an Aeryn/John and tagged it like *normal sex* not like all you *freaks*

I went and found it:

Iterations and I went off to giggle about this normcore fuck head trying to slow our roll. Like way to announce you're a boring prude to the public. Let us have our short lived fun.

The Farscape tag is uh more tame right now. People like short reads. Apparently, people still don't kudos. Meh. I don't get it. Sorry I'm horny, guys. I think its in the spirit of the show though.

Would I read again?

Yeah. I actually dig up Scorp stories all the time. It's the only thing I read though. I'm very narrowly focused.

[booblywooblies]

actually, on the topic of "the little girl you used to be" i have actually had a concept/philosophy since about 2019 about "the girl in the photo"

so for context: ive always been a little genderless goblin, ive always had bowl cuts and played with boy toys and sports and dirt and animals, i wanted to be steve irwin when i was a kid and i hated barbie. this carried on well into my teen years where i was still a tomboy and people thought i was a lesbian, i think it was really starting to hit me that id eventually have to start living as a woman unless i grapple with the fact that im trans (something ive been on and off thinking about since the age of 7)

so i was like okay, im a trans man and im going to transition, but until then i may as well try being feminine, like, yknow for fun, bc ive never really presented that way

this is where the MAJORITY of my "girl" selfies take place, ages 18-22 (i hit my gender performativity limit at 22 and started to have bad break downs about it so thats about when i gave up went back to normal but thats not important for now)

so during this time i was struggling with like, basically trying to look as appealing as possible, i learned how to pose my back and my face and angle my camera just right and i used filters and lighting and all kinds of stuff. i started to develop this idea of "the girl in the photo" she was never actually me because yknow i have a flabby body and half lidded eyes and a double chin and stuff, and because she wasnt me it didnt matter how fake she was so it was okay if i cleared up my skin with apps and edited my face to look less fat. she wasnt me, but like, at the same time she also wasnt *real*

not just in the sense that she was a false lookalike of a real person but she was also a dishonest representation of an identity that didnt belong to anyone in the first place, she was a figment of my imagination that i captured in images and presented to the (online) world as a character i sometimes played

ive actually considered fishing for funny replies on a dating site using old pictures of me and using the name "maisy" in a fake profile. bc when i was 18 i was on okc a lot, i never met up with anyone because they all saw me as the girl in the picture and it made me feel disgusted. but some of the messages i got were so bizarre and it was fun to make fun of them with my friends.

i still like the old pictures i took, they dont really make me feel dysphoric because, even my friends ive known since middle school have said "thats a completely different person, before and after"

and its like, obviously i am what youd consider transgender, i was born with a certain set of genitalia and i didnt feel the initial puberty my innate hormones caused for me was good for my well being (obviously everyones definition of trans is different but for me this is how it worked out for me) but theres something about this character i created for a handful of years of my life that feels like it was the biggest change ive ever made. me pretending to be a woman in appearances only was the most different my gender has ever been throughout my life. like its so simple to me that ive always been male, i was a little boy, a guy, and now im a man. you cant claim to know if you werent there.

[lettucedloophole]

cw vague discussion of sexual stuff and Tmi stuff about transition (Transgener) and also just me journalling my feelings

this is gonna sound Crazy but i think porn (and cishet boys making porn noises. do not miss when that was peak humour) made me dysphoric about the way i moan 😭

i get a little distressed worrying about if my reasons for transition are disproportionately sexual or overly related to misogyny, but it would make sense that they would be sexual because Thats the site of Misogyny, and ultimately i do think misogyny caused some of my dysphoria, if not most of it, though i can't say all because i think in a genderless society it would be quite natural to alter your body-- going on hormones or getting surgery would be like getting a piercing or tattoo, but hopefully without the prior distress of the Imposition of Gender and yknow. Patriarchal Discrimination.

i'm pretty certain i would be happy living with the effects of hormones day to day (except balding. will go Livid if that happens tho i mean... i like shaving my head a lot and odd haircuts so it probs wouldnt be a big deal but i want the option of growing it out to remain) but im not sure if i can say the same about bottom surgery. it seems like other trans ppl are so sure 😭 and i mean it's not like it'd be feasible for me to get it for a long time anyway but i might as well think about it in the mean time... i'm kind of ambivalent abt my vagina. but i wonder if i could be happier with something else? but i don't want to Not have a vagina in Case though (i dont think i can do anal. not willing to prep that much 💀)

so i always thought if i would get bottom surgery i'd go for a vaginal-preserving phalloplasty but i saw a pretty good meta result some days ago that's making me reconsider. and then it makes me think like, what do i want a dick for? it seems kind of.. troublesome to have an organ between ur legs. i think i'm focused a lot on ejaculation (oh yeah this post is def getting a cw) but that's not something i can do with a vaginal-preserving phalloplasty, i think. and then there's the question of clit burial and i naturally lean towards not burying it but i think i would prefer to bury it if i was sure .. and idk the complication rate cos if i lose sensation (i'm fine with doing a forearm graft) i would Lose my Mcfucking mind. i think maybe. and it's scary since there's a lot of surgeons out there who just seem to want to hurt trans people. but i'm fat anyway so i would probably not even be accepted for surgery lol 😭

so it's probably never even going to be possible for me. i take comfort in the idea that i can pack and bind and sort of. try b4 u buy. yk 🫡👍 tho im not getting top surg bc i dont wanna and i feel like i have some body acceptance to do in regards to my boobs. im rly ,, ashamed of them bc i have lots of acne scars and other scabs (caused by me. picking at my skin. either scrapes or acne lmao) and i think i would be happy with them and a lot more of my body if i could stop picking at shit and have those scars clear up. its acc so isolating to have this issue so shoutout to the one lady i followed on twt who posted a proud boob pic with some boob scars or acne (or as i call it boob-ne. like back-ne but it doesn't rhyme but it sounds funny) or smth. that made me feel less alone and not ugly 🙏

i have a lot of scars on my shoulders (Prime skin picking real estate) and the center of my chest but i still wear clothes that. show those areas sometimes and i wonder if ppl think im brave. bc i'm not i just try not to think about it after the clothes are on and i'm outside of my room Doin Stuff . same with the cutting scars on my arm but mostly my thighs. no one has ever really brought up my picking or self harm scars save for the first time my dad saw my self harm scars (that was a doozy) and this one time my dad's friend looked at my facial acne and gave me a recommendation for some product (i know she meant well but. girl 🙃) and i am so fucking thankful for ppls silence. like please just let me exist

i saw one of my childhood friends recently and Embarassingly enough i had a Mental Illness moment in front of her and i kind of wanted to, to shatter the illusion that i was the same as i was as a child because i feel so different that it feels like a lie, and i feel like i need to show the real me to people so they can decide to hate me if they want to. but i also kind of didn't want to but it would be difficult for me to cry and then collect myself in public 😭 and she comforted me but didn't make a big deal about it and maybe that helped more. idk i and probably others put a lot of emphasis on mental health but it's kind of nice to feel like... normal.. and move on. my mom kind of smothers me about my mental health and it's something i appreciate technically but maybe not in practice. idk if it's trauma but maybe i just don't appreciate physical comfort as much as i thought i did, or emotional worrying over ppl. it's just confusing bc i thought i desired these things a lot but i think it was just that the complete absence of them from my life affected me negatively, and i wanted Some Amount of it but not like A Lot. it seemed like i wanted a lot because of how much i was yearning for it but i don't think so lol 😭

it kind of follows that pattern of my mom being Too much and my dad being too little (Borderline neglectful but emotionally lmao 😭) so i guess it makes sense why my desires don't align with what i actually want. i suppose i need to Experience more to figure it out.

i also keep having Bisexual Panik that im turning straighter or am going to date a cis guy because i feel like i place a lot of emphasis on my attraction to guys. in my Mind. but i think i just note when i'm attracted to guys more bc im much more often attracted to women . and it would be difficult to keep track of all the attractive women 😭 i worry sometimes that ppl are gonna see this and be like "oh this bihet's gonna end up with a man" but what i worry about even more than that is they might be right.. but i hope not. i dony want date cishet man <3

ive reached the point in my college class now where ive Given up on voluntary reading. technically it's not voluntary but if we're not doing a class activity with it or discussing it in class its voluntary to me lmfao 💀 i struggled quite a bit with my lastest assignment, though i did get it done on time, which makes me worry that I won't be able to handle two classes. i really worry that i'm never going to be mentally stable enough to hack it. i don't think mental health meds can fix that for me as the only ones i have left to try (or the ones my psych thinks i should try, anyway) are antipsychotics and i keep having fucking insurance issues with them and they're charging me a bajillion fucking dollars so at that rate i'm never going to try them lmfao. so then i should maybe try getting tested for adhd again or autism.. but getting dxed with autism would do Nothing and just cost money. but if i did have adhd and needed medication and that made me function better, that would help! but i also worry that i have no observable condition and am just simply unable to exist in the capitalist hellscape climate by virtue of being the me... that would be the worst. but i worry that's what it is lol 😭 ah i should schedule an adhd test before i change my mind

[violetsandviolencepoetry]

Whore

I get a million little crushes

And I stare at women's asses and lips

And I wear a shirt so low cut you can see my bra

I am not a girl.

"Whore." They cry out trying to wound me

Each word as wounding as a blade of grass on a spring breeze

Only my friends get to call me that

And I'm whore-able at talking to women

Get it? I think I'm funny.

And you must think you're strong to be judging me

I want to be kissed by someone pretty

They can use their tongue and not miss me

She can call me gendered terms if it's funny

Or if we're having sex she can call me "pretty boy"

Or "whore" if she feels like eating me

She can call me anything

I'm real loud when I touch myself

Does that make me a whore?

And my friends make jokes about me being a bottom

But I'll sit on someone pretty's face when I'm free

And I am not a girl

But they can call me a "handsome woman" while leaving marks on my tits

And they can call me "pretty boy" when we switch

Rocking hips against hips

Would that make me a whore?

I've never quite had sex, I've gotten close

But I'm a fast learner with a need for tasty food

I'll trade it for some French fries if they're cute

Come over anytime beautiful

I've got a flexible schedule and a need for a new bruise

Thinking you're pretty does not make me a whore

So let's fix that, don't forget to lock the door

I'm not looking for love

I'm looking for someone to do

I like feeling sexy but I don't like being sexualized

But they could make me feel alot with those eyes

I've been told I'm wrong for wanting things my whole life

So fuck me like you need me to survive

Lips against lips, grinding on my hips

Don't worry I know exactly what I want

Sorry everyone is this too much sex for you?

Don't you know that I'm a whore?

Everyone loves poems about straight sex

Is something this genderless uncomfortable for you?

Are you speculating about what's in my pants?

I'm a whore either way, remember?

I suppose you wouldn't think so if I have a dick

Men can talk about sex like it's breathing

Anyway she can tie me up if she likes

Find a few new ways to get me tongue tied

And she can kiss me if the time is right

She doesn't have to worry I won't put up a fight

I wanna hear the bed creaking in the moonlight

Her legs on my shoulders like I'm a piece of furniture

She can demean me if she's good with words

"Whore." Is hardly a curse.

[bookio]

WOTAKOI: Love is Hard for Otaku vol 5 (2021) by Fujita

Beside the regular funny everyday life shenanigans of the main cast - like watching how Hirotaka expresses his love for Narumi (im super jealous btw), marriage life between Hanako and Tarō - the focus in this volume is the shy love between Hirotaka's little brother Naoya and his genderless friend Kō-chan. I don't have much to say, i just genuinely love the art style and stories of this universe overall! 5/5 stars

- - - - -

I Really Didn't Think This Through: Tales from My So-Called Adult Life (2018) by Beth Evans

With help of minimalistic doodles, Beth tells us about the struggles of becoming an adult when suffering with anxiety and depression. About losing her direction after spent most of her years studying to become a nurse, only to lose interest in it all together. She self harms, binge food and develops severe self-image issues along with phobia for social interactions. And then she got help.

I could relate to a lot of things she told, even having similar social interactions and thought processes. Even though she ends almost every chapter with "it's okay" or "it's going to be alright" or "everything will work out" to assure you everything will be fine, it became very annoying for me. She knows this too because she does mention the frustration when people say everything will be alright, for it not to happened, and then feel even more bad about failing to reach that "alright" stage. The doodles sometimes takes up serval pages, i don't mind them but they sometimes shows up in the middle of a sentence and disrupts the flow so i found myself usually skipping them.

It was nice hearing from someone in similar situation and how she got out, sometimes i wish she had gone more personal instead of singing the default "it's going to be alright" mantra and shared the process of how to reach an ok route. If someone asked how she got better, i wouldn't be able to explain it properly, just that "she talked to someone" but we know there's more to it in between, and i wish so intensely she would have told me. 3/5 stars

[locallepidoptera]

the thing is i am so girl. i’ve thought about gender. i’ve experimented with gender. and i’ve come to the conclusion i am just a simple cis girl. girl to the max. top of the girl meter. my style is girl. my personality is girl. my personality isn’t just being girl. but being girl is the base. 

it’s just that i don’t want internet friends to imagine my appearance and imagine a girl. i want them to imagine goop. genderless goop. a shapeless mound. i guess part of it is me wanting to distance the way i act on the internet from my real self. i guess part of it is i want internet friends to consume the many colors of my thoughts. i don’t want my internet friends to consume myself like i’m another piece of media. i want them to consume my thoughts. and my thoughts take the form of a holographic sludge. i guess part of it is i don’t wanna be percieved as something sharp. sharp as in sharp edges. i want to be percieved as soft but in a distincly inhuman way. i guess part of it is sometimes i just don’t wanna be human. not because i don’t like humanity but because i love observing humanity and that would be easier if i wasn’t human. i guess part of it is just the human need to feel different. i guess part of it is just my personal need to feel like a funny little guy. i want to be doted on. not because i’m pitiful. not because i am a fellow flawed human. but because i’m just a funny little cutie. 

i know i can’t just be a funny little guy all the time, because it is a persona i’m putting on and no persona can last forever. but i try anyway. because it brings me such a unique kind of joy.