#my fucking cursed npc they all believe they know what the curse is on him but never asked him in person if thats what it was

[teapsoon]

i never wanna dm for these motherfuckers again

[chosenonesdnd]

HELLLLOOOOO TUMBLR

Dungeon Master, @theartistcassiroll here!

This is the blog for ✨Chosen Ones DnD✨, a visual novel style, LGBTQ+ DnD podcast with an all artist cast. (you can watch it here!)

I've been very indoctrinated into the hellscape of X/twitter/whatever the fuck and so I need to break out of my habit of corporate social-media-fying my posts. My tumblr roots are strong and can be unearthed - I believe in me.

Tumblr sexy men are unfortunately my roman empire and so it's only fitting I use this post to show you the TSM of our show.

Introducing fan favorite NPC... The Magic Man (they/he/it)! I realized too late what I did with this cocktail of character traits and design choices, but here he is in all his glory.

I've very sorry to anyone who likes him and had to hear from me the unfiltered truth that he is a TSM, but I've embraced this long ago and so should you. An eldritch entity with strong theater kid energy who has powers beyond your comprehension with an old timey aesthetic? Truly, the signs were all there. And now, he's finally home here on tumblr 🥹🤧.

Anyways.

Which of our NPCs is most like the Onceler?

So glad you asked!

Meet Arthur (he/him) another fan favorite (or fan hated, depends who you're talking to) NPC, and my personal fav. Our lovable asexual, homoromantic wizard and as we all know wizard nerds never do anything wrong.

Why is he cursed to be here in the Onceler spot? For reasons that are spoilers, unfortunately. I'm sure it'll become obvious with time.

I've embarrassed myself enough for one post, but if you're interested at all in learning more about Chosen Ones, the world, and characters, stick around!

Our ask box is also open if you have any questions~.

(art for both characters by me, @theartistcassiroll)

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

Apparently my brain keeps coming up with cursed things so, SDV townies or SVE/RSV really reacting to farmer calling them babygirl???

And now I am starting to imagine all of them in THAT babygirl pose I'm so sorry if it's stuck in your brain too

Omg babygirl everywhere. This is gonna be one of the most cursed headcanons I've ever write (or not? depends on what people say)

By the way, I found myself in such a situation that I do not fully know the term "babygirl". That is, I knew that women were usually affectionately called that from English, and babygirl as a meme on Twitter and Tumblr referred only to men (I'm not kidding, I was looking for the meaning of babygirl and this is what Google gave me):

"Submissive and breedable", huh.

Sorry anon, but with mods you get a lot of NPCs, so I'll write about some SDVs and SVE/RSVs. I hope you still like it. Enjoy!

--------------------------------------------------

Despite the fact that he blushed a little, Alex believes that he is not just a babygirl, but the best babygirl. Look at his muscles, look at those biceps, he's just made for the perfect babygirl pose! Seriously, he praises it like he won a gridball championship.

Depending on the mood, Magnus will either give the Farmer a suspicious look and inquire about their mental health, or simply teleport them away from his tower. In any case, the wizard has too much to do to waste time on nonsense.

Immediately to the clinic! No, Harvey doesn't want to listen to any protests! Get on the bed right now, and he will bring all the necessary medicines. The Farmer does have sunstroke or a high fever if they're delusional and call Harvey "babygirl". Maru, we have an emergency!

"Perhaps there are new ways of courting among young people in the world, or maybe it was an unusual way to insult my person," Lance thought, not understanding exactly how he should react to this word addressed to him from his farmer friend.

Wh-what? No, Victor is not a babygirl! Yes, he knows what that means, but refuses to believe it. But still at home, in front of the mirror, he stood in one of the babygirl poses from social networks... And blushed because he really looks cute, he is a perfect babygirl. Victor prays that his mom doesn't catch him in this position...

Morris is in a small stupor, trying to understand if they just insulted him or said a compliment. Hm, maybe he'll rethink about that "babygirl" as the new slogan for Joja cola, since the word is so popular with young people!

Please, Farmer, don't. Gus doesn't know the meaning of the word and doesn't want to know. It also worries visitors to the Saloon. They are his friend, but there must be limits to what is permitted!

Well, all people have their quirks. And as long as it's not an insulting and vulgar word to anyone, Gunther doesn't mind. Well, he hopes it's not an insult or vulgarity.

It's because Elliott's long hair makes him look like a girl? Does this word have another meaning as well? Ah, compliment? Why, thank you kindly, Farmer. He's a little confused, but flattered anyway.

Poor Shane will choke on his beer when he hears this word from the Farmer. Now all people in the Saloon is looking at both of them. He just wanted a drink in peace, why....

...Farmer, you know that Kent is married, right?... No, he does NOT want to know the meaning of this word, he already has a headache after Sam's talk about Fortnite and TikTok trending. Give this poor man break.

Yes, he is a baby girl, baby baby baby girl. He is a small child. Come on, insult him ​​again, why not! He's a fucking joke for young assholes like Farmer apparently! (Andy took this word too seriously, like the phrase "confuse your enemy by yelling at them")

Ahh, thanks Farmer. Yes, Sam has seen on social media that some characters in babygirl poses look quite cursed, but he is pleased that the Farmer called him cute, albeit with that word. Hey, take a picture of Sam, he wants send this pic to Sebastian and Abigail and laugh about it!

Still, Jio's instinct didn't let him down. Despite the friendship with the Farmer, the victory over Gabriela's corruption and all other merits, the Farmer is still an idiot. How else to explain the word that they said to the ninja elf?

Erm, thanks? Poor June, he had strange admirers before, but at least the Farmer with "babygirl" turned out to be harmless to him. Right? Isn't that an insult?

It looks like the young adventurer hit their head in the mine a lot harder than Marlon thought. No matter how the Farmer resists, no matter how the old bones of the one-eyed adventurer hurt from the heavy and kicking burden, Marlon is determined to take the Farmer to the clinic for an examination. No, he doesn't know anything about their "Tweeters and smartphones", he'll get them to Dr. Harvey right now.

[oodlyenough]

6-2 magical turnabout

I gotta admit I was deeply skeptical of this one, because it felt weird to jump back to Apollo and Athena and Japanifornia after the tutorial, and I'd heard about the uh questionable way Phoenix and Trucy's relationship is handled, and the Gramarye retcon stuff was a mess ...

but I actually really liked it! At least as much as Turnabout Academy, where I think they are similarly "so dumb it loops back around to being fun" (not a bad place to be for an AA filler case). What gives this one the edge is that SOJ has actual gameplay again. Thank fucking god. I can click things! I can investigate! There are minigames! I have to solve puzzles myself instead of waiting for NPC Athena to do it for me! These are the most basic elements of an AA game and somehow Dual Destinies had none of them, making SOJ feel like a revelation. So I think that makes this my fave case since AA4? Wow

Anyway let's get into it

I like the idea of defendant Trucy. Trucy was so ignored in AA5, and even in AA4 where she was a major player we rarely dealt with how she honestly feels about things. So it was nice to explore that a little more. Being a defendant is a rite of passage for an Ace Attorney character. She's all grown up now.

A magic show as the scene of a murder is a really fun idea also. It just gives great excuses for the shenanigans that take place in any murder case, and the solution feels less contrived bc it is with a perpetrator and a set design where those things are expected and facilitated naturally without a shit ton of contrivances and coincidences.

Apollo and Athena, for all my complaints about how they cannibalize each other's screentime just by simultaneously existing, are a fun team. And this time we actually got a lot of interactive banter because we actually got to CLICK STUFF wow so great much gameplay.

I do really enjoy Athena. I wish this franchise would get out of the habit of creating these interesting but half-baked characters just to park them immediately in the next instalment to create more interesting but half-baked characters. I have the rest of SOJ to go but I don't imagine Athena will have much of a role to play in it, just like how Apollo got shafted in DD to make way for Athena, and Trucy fared even worse. The main cast is so bloated the games can't balance everyone.

I am THRILLED Ema is back. Some of her new sprites are sf cute too. Overall, I have to compliment SOJ's sprites, which are very detailed and have lots of different animations. Many characters have new/more expressive ones, and they look way better than DD's 3D models.

The Gramarye lore is a hot mess. I do not believe the new writer remembered that Trucy is a Gramarye on her MOM'S side, since apparently the "Gramarye creed" was "passed down from my father, from his father", making it... the Enigmar creed. I also, generally, could probably have done without some of the way the Gramaryes were discussed here. They were pretty obviously a toxic shitshow nightmare in AA4, and Phoenix explicitly wants to protect Trucy from the truth of that. Here, we introduce the Jonkler out of nowhere, and have him cursing Magnifi and taking his revenge on ... the toddler... and it's all just a little bit weird. The poster of him being CANCELLED is the funniest thing I've ever seen though so I can forgive a lot of it just for that.

Also where is my man Valant. Why the hell would Trucy invite the Onceler to her show and not him lmao. Justice for Valant!!

I've also never wished Apollo knew his heritage more than in that last bit where Tony Stark was raving about how he defeated the "last" Gramarye lmao.

Nahyuta is ... fine so far. Honestly I know he's so unpopular in fandom but he's kind of fine so far? Not an immediate fave, but not even in my bottom two. The bit where he talks about studying Japanifornian culture made me think of the Dalek that "knows everything" because it downloaded the internet in 2013.

I've been semi-spoiled for Apollo and Nahyuta having a history together, and I have to say I'm pleasantly surprised that the game is not concealing this, but teasing it right from the off. I liked that in Apollovision his dialogue box is labelled "Nahyuta" even though everyone in-dialogue is calling him by his surname. I suspect this might be more a game dev limitation (character limit?) than anything else, but even if that's the case, it's a happy coincidence. The real test will be if they manage to stop Nahyuta and Apollo from feeling like a redux of Edgeworth and Phoenix, or Athena and Blackquill. Much of my issue with the end of DD was that it felt like we were just revisiting the trilogy's greatest hits without the same depth. But... whatever. I'm intrigued enough, at this point.

The biggest problem with this case, the elephant in the room, is Phoenix, who is inexplicably not there for his daughter's debut, did not even send flowers (apparently), and does not even talk to her on the phone in the last scene. This is exceedingly stupid and reeks of a total narrative oversight because they're not even trying to make some kind of point about Nick being a bad father. It's just a total lack of thought or effort. But ... anyway I have a whole other post written up about how Trucy and Phoenix's relationship is written in all the games, so, more on that another day, I guess. TL;DR Canon is a liar sometimes.

The "Gramarye[Enigmar] Family Motto" stuff, which is already so similar to the Mia Fey wisdom, could've just been collapsed into one thing: Trucy as a performer adapting that lawyer motto to her own life would be a nice way to show how Trucy is influenced by Phoenix, as well as Apollo and Athena. But uh, well, the game doesn't seem to care much about Trucy and Phoenix, so. I also find the "smile though your heart is breaking" mantra, including the JUDGE telling Trucy to look happy lmao??!?!, is like, kind of weird tonally, to the degree where I wonder if there's a culture gap happening. But I don't know enough about Japan to say.

Overall, though, I enjoyed this case. SOJ is off to an OK start with me so far, at least in comparison to DD.

[coffee-counts-as-a-meal]

warning for tlou ep 4 spoilers (and TLOU Part 2) but:

not to be horribly meta on main but I'm mainly screaming over how this episode exemplified how well this story was adapted to a television format, ESPECIALLY regarding the themes that ND has repeatedly stated he wanted to explore in the TLOU Part 2 that maybe didn't quite land the way he meant them to

(Benioff and Weiss and their hatred for eighth grade book reports should be taking copious notes rn lol)

I remember when the second game came out and there was this big to-do about how the perspective towards "villains" had changed - not just in the fact that you spend half the game playing as Abby (Joel's killer), but that the developers had actually given names to all the NPCs that end up as cannon fodder for the player. The AI was supposed to be so advanced that for every enemy you killed as either Abby or Ellie, the NPC would beg for their life or curse you as you make the final blow or whatever, and then when their NPC friends found them you would hear their wailing and crying out for "Beck" or "Miranda" or whomever the fuck and the whole idea was that it was supposed to make you the player really think about the implications of taking a human life and the cycle of revenge yadda yadda yadda.

Which is a GREAT CONCEPT, but I just remember how...tedious it became, after a while. TLOU Part 2 got a lot of flak for a lot of reasons (some more valid than others imo) but I personally think its impossibly difficult to instill the lesson of "taking a life is something that carries real emotional weight" through the medium of a video game where you are mowing down LITERALLY HUNDREDS OF PEOPLE. That's just par for the course - you end up killing so many people that after a while their names mean nothing, BECAUSE THERE'S NO WAY TO CONTINUE THE GAME WITHOUT DOING SO. (I remember one reviewer talking about how fatigued they were with it - they didn't want to be killing all these people and stabbing dogs and they as a player were screaming through their fingers at the decisions Ellie was making to continue down this cycle of violence but there was no way to continue the game without going through it, even though the point had already been hammered home over and over again to the point where it was exhausting, we get it, killing should not be this easy but this is a video game for fuck's sake).

And maybe that was also the point was to make the player wonder how some characters (like Joel, maybe) eventually become so numb to the concept of taking life, but I just remember it being a point in Part 2 that ultimately just...kind of missed the mark.

And BOY OH BOY did the show hit it in this episode.

Literally, TLOU Part 2 wanted to make its point by naming hundreds upon hundreds of NPCs and TLOU Episode 4 managed to hit it with a single character named Bryan.

I think it also helps that when Joel is shooting back at the "hunters" (idk what they're calling them in the show canon but that's what they were at the game) we don't really see them die onscreen, so it makes Bryan's eventual demise even starker. But holy fuck hearing him plead with Ellie and Joel for his life hit so much harder than it ever did in the game. Hearing him try to bargain with a little girl, screaming for his mom only to go silent...I freaking love Joel and even then in that moment I felt that horror and slight...idek what to call it, not even disgust but just the moral grayness of it all made my stomach churn.

Ellie's tears felt so deserved in that moment. Even Joel's moment of hesitation (fuck you Pedro Pascal I hate how good you are at EVERYTHING) even as you know this must have been a thing he's done thousands of times before and even as necessary you might consider Bryan's death to be. Even as justified it may have been to kill an enemy in that moment, "It doesn't get any easier" is something that rings true. I believe it.

tldr; another banger episode from a team that knows what the fuck a theme is and how to tie that into your story with subtlety and nuance and FUCK EVERYONE AT NAUGHTY DOG AND HBO I CAN'T KEEP GETTING MY HEART BROKEN FOR ANOTHER MONTH AND A HALF

[forgetsrotation]

6.4 Tataru's Grand Endeavor

FULL SPOILERS, INCLUDING IMAGES!! A complete live blog of my progressions through the quest.

Proceed at your own risk. I won't cypher it with rot13 since it's behind a read more. Hopefully no one gets spoiled unintentionally. ;v;

PLEASE DO THE WERLYT TATARU QUEST BEFORE YOU READ THIS I BEG YOU!!!!!

A miqo picture so the other image doesn't pop up and spoil ppl lol

I'm come down, relatively, from the thrill of it all. Two separate quests... no follow quest, which would have been disappointing if uhhh not for EVERYTHING ELSE THAT WAS GREAT!!! I am so pleased and I'm not just saying that because of what we got at the end of it all. :)

However. I cannot believe--

OK. Henceforth will be my live blog reactions bc that's fun to chronicle! I hope you can derive some joy from it too. Fair warning, I curse a lot out of excitement. Gibberish. It's pure joy. You will NOT understand this if you haven't played the new quest yet LOL

----

Up at 5AM for these two… like a long nap after going to bed at 12:30AM lol. Waiting for patch to dl! It seems to have finished early, but I am in no rush!! My recording software is set up. :)

MILITARY EQUIPMENT??? Gaius’s “brother-in-arms”…

OUTFIT THE TROOPS AHHHHHHHHHHHHjsa

f

;asdjkfal;ksjdflkjaskdfsadf

GOING TO SEE HIS HUSBAND FOR REAL!!!!!!!!!

MIQO KNOWS WHERE TO FIND HIS HUSBAND HEHEHE

I’m gonna frow up

me being able to crime tools gpose him wherever I want (still takes the time to gpose)

they are married

He really has changed!!

EXCUSE ME SOMEONE STOLE THE G-SAVIOR???????

AVILINA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHH

Other business = see his husband, but Gaius is very shy

HUHHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOO

Aww I love when he kneels to talk to children

NOT THE CLOUD DECK !!! gpose time……….

HOLY SHITTTT U;MDFJDJ I’M LOSING MY MINDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD (post blogging: it was a fake out. it's ok tho lol)

Miqo can drive better than Gaius :)

support from the rear, huh……………………….

FUCK I AM SO READY LET’S GOOOOOOOOO

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP

WHERE IS ALLIE THO… HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

NERO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nero is mad at the bottom accusations.

THE SYMBOLISM……….

EVERY TIME I SEE MIQO AND GAIUS IN A CUTSCENE TOGETHER I WANT TO FROW UP (AFFECTIONATE)

me constantly checking for allie. Severa is no where to be found… neither is vald...

checking all the npcs for flavor text… one lady moves around now!

Aw baby you know Makoh’to will help you anytime, anywhere!!

HOLDING HANDS TIME

OMDasdfkj I’M GOING TO FUCKING EXPIRE

hehehe she sure does!!

just know my face has been like :D this whole time

Aw… Miqo is good at soothing children so it’s ok!!

I am crying

CRYINGGGGGGGGG

I MF CUKING DLKJSDKLFJLKJSDF IDM”A I MA MSLDKDJSJDK

I’M LEGIT GOING TO FROW UP (AFFECTIONATE) NYTKLSDLFK MY HEART IS RACING SO FAST RIGHT NOW I DFKLJKSDF I CANNOT EVEN OH MY GODDDDDDD PLEASEEE LET IT BE THE ITEM WE GET

I”M GOING FO CUKGING ODIM

I AM FOR REAL FUCKING DYING RIGHT NOW I AM LOSING MY FUCKING MIND

I”M FOIGN IDI” I”M CRYING AHAHAHAHAA THEY HAVE NEW OUTFITS I AM DIYGOLINSDKFSDKLFJLKSDJFL:KSDJFI:LOJSDLK:FGJSDL:KFJDSLK:FJSDLKFJildsf

I CANNOT FUCKING DLBNELKJSDKFJDF

THGIUS IS MORE THAN I COULD HAVE EVER ASKEDDDD

IF THEY DON’T LET ME HAVE GTHAT PROAISLDFJDFJD SFI”MG OING FDSL:K

NEW PICTURE TO ADD TO MY WALLET

waiting for the sun to rise so I can take better gposes… simmering in this feeling……….. letting it wash over me………… I’m guessing we will not get this portrait as our reward but I am so happy it happened all the same. Family picture real………………………………………………..

THEY????????? DID THEY GIVE IT TO ME????????????falskdfjl;kasjdfkl;jasdlfkjasdf

TGHEY DIDDLFDKSJFLKJDS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I am in disbelief……………..

WAIT HOLD ON I FORGOT TO GO BACK AND LOOK AT IF THEY HAVE NEW FLAVOR TEXT AND--------

GAIUS IS SITTING ON THE BENCH I ALWAYS GPOSE THEM ON AND HAVE LORE FOR I"MF LSKJDFLKSJDFKLJSDFKLJSDKLFJKLSAJFKLDSJFKLJSAKLJDFSDKF AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Allie's overlooking the sea...

FINALLY SEV AND VALD!! They even have new flavor text!

i am so happy........t his is more than i could have dreamed

feel free to talk to me about this on twt in dms! i don't have much to say except keyboard smash.

[gray-morality]

Tagged: Altitis Edition

@thefreelanceangel

Favorite | Fakhri Man'tik Obviously I'm biased because he's the one I currently main. But I do believe that, with every new character, I learn something or 'get better' (even if I have 25+ years of RP experience) and Fakhri is something very new for me to RP. His personality alone but also his overall view on life and how he went through it. He's definitely the one that allows me the most freedom, not even being afraid of the ridicule, which can play a big part. He's also provocative, inciting reactions from others or dragging them into a scene.

Oldest | Katsuro Wakahisa Katsuro was 'born' in The Secret World back in 2015 and I brought him with me in other games, FFXIV being the latest and possibly where his story ends? Who knows! He's more typical yakuza archetype and very hard to RP because he lacks empathy and fucks to give. He also is very reserved and extremely disciplined, which makes it hard to introduce him into new situations or places.

Newest | Fakhri Man'tik If that wasn't obvious by now :p

Meanest | Katsuro Wakahisa I mean, can you do meaner than an assassin and serial killer with a lack of empathy... Not that he doesn't have his good side but you have to find it, or let him drop his guard, which frankly rarely happens. He's painfully direct and doesn't care how people feel or what they think about him. To be honest, Fakhri can also be painfully direct and not give a shit... but he's far less stoic and his overall attitude is more prone to make him look like an ass. Guess that balance it all a bit.

Softest | Yuu Fujimoto He's my irezumi master, and he's a big dork. Oh he sure can fight, having trained under Doman monks all his childhood, but then he went on an apprenticeship to become a tattoo master and managed to make a living out of his passion and really, he never loved to fight. He sings like a battery of casseroles someone dropped on the floor but his energy at karaoke is infectious, as well as his smile.

Most Aloof/Standoffish | Dr. Thanos [Lux] Caius Despite caring about people's wellbeing in general, he's an intellectual and will prefer his books instead of talking to people. If you say something stupid, you can bet he's looking at you with a judgmental gaze. He has very little tolerance for stupidity, verrryyy little.

Dumbest (Affectionate) | Luula [GW2] I rarely make dumb characters unless they're disposable NPCs. Luula was an exception. She was Asura in GW2. For those who know the game, I can hear you say "But aren't they the most intelligent and advanced of the races?" Well yes, but you see Luula's mother had an accident when her daughter was but a baby still in her belly and... poor Luula was born with some... problems. This obviously resulted with her being shunned from the Asura society and ending up as a ranger (she has a big bear) travelling the world. People really loved her, she was cute and silly.

Dumbest (Derogatory) | Ren Yasui He was essentially a NPC and your typical muscles without a brain archetype. He didn't have a presence in game, as I never made the character, but instead was featured in a few short stories all part of The Cursed Hand narrative. a campaign that stretched over 2 years.

Smartest | Dr. Thanos [Lux] Caius I guess this makes him somewhat hard to RP because I definitely don't have his intellect XD nor his immense knowledge in medicine.

Horniest | Fakhri Man'tik Most of my characters being NPCs, their level of horniness is simply inexistent. As for those I did/do roleplay, I'd say their libido is quite mild. Katsuro is possibly the worse, since he's demi-sexual, his sexual drive linked to actually loving the person. My 'leader' characters [Ujitoshi Hagane and Hikmat Shah] are both asexual. Other characters are old and not interested in that anymore [Sun Hyeon] and some, while not asexual, are either no longer interested or never truly were that much [Dr. Caius who prefers knowledge to people and Yuu who had a wife, with whom he had a daughter, they got divorced and now he's early 50s with a teenager, working his dream job and content in life.] Which leaves us with Fakhri, who's just your normal guy, really. He enjoys sex as much as the guy next door but can go without for long periods as well. So he isn't a horny machine, just a very normal man.

Character You'd Bang | Fakhri Man'tik Mainly because he's a very respectful and caring lover. He doesn't have a type, doesn't have any expectations and won't shame anyone for being clumsy or inexperienced.

Character You'd Be RL Besties With | Yuu Fujimoto As tempted I am to say Fakhri, he may be too 'loud' and disruptive on occasions for me irl. Yuu, on the other hand, is calm yet knows how to have fun. He's also an artist, which I can relate to. So we'd totally be showing each other our new drawings and whatnot. He's also hard working and respectful, but won't let others step over him either.

Tagging: whoever wants to do it I guess xD

[safetyobstacles]

Parte dois of my giant post to hold all my reactions as i watch Desconjuração because my original post somehow got MASSIVE

so spoilers under the cut starting on ep 9 BBBB)))))

parte uno

update from episode 11 this post is also massive help

you know that song "our house in the middle of our street" thats what this half of desconjuração is like but its just "our house" over and over and over and

WHAT THE HELL WHY WHY WHY WHY

i am sad about liz but its okay im fine its im so sad im rotting im dust my bones have turned to acid and liquid and theres no putting me back together its okay at least i still have arthur and kaiser and erin and joui and WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

EP 9 im going to its 130 am and i have work in the morning but i actually cant sleep until i know what happens to Ivete

cellbit got a haircut for christmas

the void room looks so cool ????????? joui doesnt get a line sus

ABSOLUTE COMEDY GOLD THIAGO AND BEA that was the funniest shit ever "careful asking questions" "GOT ANY SUGGESTIONS??" KKKKKKK i had to pause to breathe if ivete dies because of this at least it was really fucking funny

??????????????????????????????????????????????? i have trust issues is this even real

off topic but ivete, kaiser, and arthur all living together is actually the cutest thing ever i want to crush them like an orange to make juice

joui why are you being so vague over this phone call sus sus sus sus

cellbit says the word photos and i wanna throw him out a window leave kaisers photos aloooooooooooonnnnnneneeeeeee oh nvm the photos are normal :)

joui looking good with his 26 hp 69 sanity :)) erin slowly going crazy with her 13 sanity :))))))) dante is just kinda homeless rn isnt he

ok i feel like this is probably real enough that i can go to sleep without worrying

i think my favourite ordem song is in the second half of this season but that also doesn't bode well for the team...

tristan FUMBLES with the pool question

joui wasnt in the spooky room joui wont hug tristan.............. sus

im so glad everyone else thinks that bea asking for suggestions was funny as fuck dude i was in tears over it

LOOOOL dude i couldnt figure out why Mia was so familiar shes in the GAME her and Lupi i cant believe i didnt recognize her at first its okay ivete i also cant do math in my head

'yeah she fought the god of death thats why shes old' this is so awkward for fernando specifically

why is erin's grandma an elite hacker i think we should open the possible ransomware for fun good thing erin passed her sanity test wtf kaiser's apartment is haunted his computer is haunted his face is fucked up one of his friends just died someone go buy him some gum erin i think your grandma might have joined a cult

kaiserrrrrr he cares so much about his people, giving ivete money to find a new place for now agatha really grows on you shes just a little guy with deadly tendencies and fun hobbies

joui vs modern technology is such a good bit

kaiser about to dislocate his knee all over again door strong

'tem dois pufes' WHAT A GOOD WORD PUFES I LOVE THAT INCREDIBLE suspicious note in the haunted wine cabinet kaiser with the haunted cigarettes and the haunted weed idk which team is more cursed team 2 has a cellbit npc but team 1 has the guys that are seeing phantom eyeballs everywhere

quatro pessoas..... fofoca..... bro arnaldo fritz got around EVERYWHERE are we sure thiago is his only kid the plumbing might need some work wow thats actually like my worst nightmare whats happening to kaiser erin with 13 sanity about to start her singing career

water being used as a horror element makes this 10 times harder to get through for me just the idea of it freaks me out lolll enigma of the printer they're never going to get this file printed strong feeling that tristan is going to get mangled in the haunted house

if i was cellbit and all my players were scattered around the house trying to do 7 different things all at once i would just cry

dante's lost, tristan is trying to set up erin and joui, arthur and fernando are arguing over a printer, kaiser is pocketing a laptop, bea is trying to advance the plot, joui is panicking over groups of 4

kaiser dont go to the bathroom the water is trying to drown you CAN WE LEAVE THJE HAUNTED HOUSE why all these houses fucked up kaiser no more houses for you thats horrible thats horrible thats horrible why do you hate photography cellbit

tristan dont look out tristan stay hiding tristan shut the fuck up the evil monster is in the hALLWAY oh nevermind oh nevermind never mind oh shit oh FUCK DAMN DAMN DAMN BRO GOT OPENED LIKE A CAN OF TUNA

EP 10 theres no way this can go worse than the Virgulino house fight

this season's opening is so good last season's was as well i love good opening sequences DAMN i just watched osnf opening again and now im sad once more i watched it 4 more times i am in AGONY

THE TRISTAN CORPSE erin with 18 sanity doing better nevermind fucking hell maybe we get erin out of here bea runs TOWARDS the corpse thats crazy hello luciano this is really awkward for you to show up right now

go downstairs go downstairs go downstairs go downstairs leave the house leave the house leave the house guys joui has the right idea get the hell out

would be crazy to be one of the neighbours looking out the window right now ERINNNNNNN its ok its ok joui about to beat up dante not the van cellbit looks sus as fuck i think they should go visit the neighbours all the blood might make it a bit awkward tho

so glad i can read portuguese so this notebook could make me sad before Bea even started reading it who's letting their kid answer the door when you live across from a haunted house

little tiny Arthur terrorizing these kids he doesnt mean it puppy fernando probably would have been the better person to talk to the neighbours kaiser repeating their names so he doesnt forget like he did in the house im gonna break something

'its us three forever' AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA im going to deastroy ecveryhting rgresrebhvaljkvbfdsahlvnfakdv

ok but at least if we are going back in the house can we figure out whats up with the printer are we suuuuure the laptop doesnt have a charger is there a ladder that we can use, have kaiser or arthur climb up look through a window, see if they can see the spider woman

the plan is dont die IM SURE THEY WILL ALL BE OKAY bea i think if you go with you die maybe the spider woman is turning tristan's body into a puppet and shes gonna start a puppet show

im so glad we're going in the house at night im so glad theres a red light in the haunted house at night im so glad this is a group of 4 Joui got me paranoid PICTURE DEVELOPMENT ROOM thats not very scary nevermind kaiser get away from the sink its gonna try to suck you again is that bastet ive seen his doki doki stream

i was just gonna comment on how cellbit suddenly sat up straight but he just became grandma again bro erin has 8 sanity one of her best friends just died in front of her she needs to go home ooog idk if we go upstairs ooooggggrgrgbrehgrdf joui idk if you go in front ur kinda freaking out

i hate this house haunted wardrobe about to eat dante the haunted eyeball is contagious ok what do we all have in common that the eyeball is haunting them ABSOLUTELY NOTHING that i can think of the odds of dante putting that number in his phone thats crazy has anyone thought about looking up at the ceiling while they walk

ok now open the door again thats how the eyes work they disappear after you see them ok nvm stop trying to open the door shut the door shut the door KICK THE DOOR???? EXTREMO??? joui that room is hella haunted "hehe nao sabe" wheres kian, kian sabe

i would like to ask again has anyone considered looking up at the ceiling this entire time oh lol they actually looked up just now LAPTOP CHARGER POG who the hell is moving a whole stove upstairs if it broke just put it outside joui is afraid of the upstairs stove

i feel like whatever monster is in this house isnt resposible for kaiser's memory problems/photo problems because his photos got messed up all the way back at Liz's apartment, and the dripping sound was happening before that or maybe its just a part of it since joui and dante have seen the eyesballs now too but why does ivete see it too ? ?? ? its linked specifically to kaiser maybe? maybe its like the flu and hes spreading it by coughing on everyone but then if it is linked to kaiser why him?? i dont remember anything especially specific happening to him at the end of osnf

if thats a photo of them right now ill die thats another horror trope i hate is when you get confirmation that something is indeed watching you please look out the window i have to know ok maybe it isnt

wait didnt that old lady call them an uber like 3 hours ago maybe they can print a key for one of the doors the most obvious crack in the wall everybody missed it for so long

alright buddy cellbit why do you keep calling out the time thats sus why is he counting it out by the minute stop it joui you loser that was cute maybe we burn it outside have you guys ever thought of that maybe we burn it outside so we arent trapped in the house

couldnt have tried burning it outside joui hiding in rocks like a crab okay kaiser runs INTO the house okAY kinda figured the door would do that ah fhfdvnfjdavbklfrdhaij; this music is awesome bea going to hide in a pillow fort idk if that ones gonna work bud wait yeah maybe we dont go in the van something vandalized it last time

"you still dont hear footsteps" ok but last time thats when tristan got plucked also the hell music is still playing so luciano HIIIDE JUST HIDE maybe break the window??? JKUST HIDE STOP FIGHTING THE WINDOW JUST HIDE NVM OK JUMP OUT THE WINDOW LEEEEEAVE NAAO no gkd danmnmuit LUIS BEAAAA shes hgonna shoot him on accident dante got the fuck out lmaooooo

LUCIANO LIVES??????? HE LIVEDDDDDDDDDDD leave the house leave the house leave the house leave the house theres still a half hour left this episode is stressing me out so bad its awesome

headless doll how nice how friendly how normal for a haunted house nvm now the doll has a head erin needs a vacation she has 8 sanity this fucking laptop is the actual boss of the house no way theres only 10 minutes left we're gonna be stuckj in this house for another episode mom pick me up i want to go home

burn the photo OUTSIDE wehats wrong with you guys THANK YOU JOUI NO KAISER wait so it wasnt reacting to the photos getting burned not the POV photo damn poor record guy AWESOME COFFINS GREAT ONE IS OPEN COOL

ep 11 shoutout to orpheu for living this long

rakin did something different with his hair

opening the unchained coffin is wild but you go dante dont let anyone stop you grabbing the floating tape is wild but you go bea dont let anyone stop you taking a picture of the monster is such a good idea you just have to not die in the process\

'kills victims after devouring their memories' KAISERRRRRR 'you guys are getting tired and hungry' ok well maybe if someone didnt fuck up their van they could go to a waffle house

CUP NOODLES POG why are you judging joui's cup noodle flavour listen just send arthur to the old lady's house sure he has one arm and a scarred face but hes arthur hes so small hes the kind of person old people love joui about to get sucked by the sink oh nevermind is this water even safe to drink tho theyre about to get parasites

joui and arthur sharing ramen :) so cute so small so cute how have non of these people eaten ramen before this isnt even real ramen its instant noodles this cooking break is kind of nice if you ignore the invisible spider stalking them no way we take a nap in the haunted house

this is supposed to be sad i can tell but im obsessed with memory loss kaiser going 'wow look at my totally normal faceless parents in this totally normal picture' and arthur just being 'no kaiser no no no'

really admire how we're all just chilling in the haunted house erin so quiet joui you are such a loser i love you NOO ERIN CAN ALSO HEAR THEM KKKKKKKK luciano gnawing on a brick of instant noodles is so real joui and erin gonna make my heart bones dissolve stop it ill die nobody smile at her she may have a heart attack

am i crazy is it not wild to be napping in the haunted house i feel crazy cellbit saying 'you feel strange' but its just luciano changing back had me so scared for half a second fernando this is so awkward you know that tristan is dead right

joui and arthur SLEEPING ON THE COUCH TOGETHER GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR "bom dia joui :)"

POLICE OPEN UP joui just let the cop in joui is incredibly charming nvm not that charming english jumpscare wheres thiago when you need him he could talk his way out of this uh oh

STOPPP the english is killing me also these cops are about to die horribly dante playing splinter cell ana about to get SNATCHED JUAREZ MOOOOVE dude that thing looks awesome her arms are so long AHHH HE MAKES IT OUT THE WINDOW THIS TIME we shoot the monster as its trying to hug joui okay 8 damage is fucked

kaiser is playing pokemon snap meanwhile the monster is trying to turn arthur's chest into a bread bowl luciano doing crazy damage this fight beaaaaaa bbbro its eating her DESASTRE??? nah wait doesnt this thing eat memories before it kills you dude come on bea barely has any HES ABOUT TO PUNCH THE BIRD ORPHEU IS GLOWING AGAINN dante stumbling through the window

erin is so real hiding this whole fight DAMN snapped orpheu like a pencil HE SAID THE THING ???????????? this thing hates knowledge specifically it has so much HEALTH IT CAN REACH OUT THE WINDOW JOUI FUCKIGN SLIPPPPPEDDDD kaiser so mad about being the photographer JOUI YOU'RE SO COOOOOL

cellbit you fucker i dont think tiny bird cpr is going to help YO????? erin chilling with 2 sanity open the door open it open it thats a whole book cellbit...........................

EP 12 whats on the laptop whats in that room can we go home yet

hi everybody welcome to the next episode here have some trauma

nobody smile at erin she's liable to just straight up kill herself if you arent careful 'im gonna tell bea i liked her writing :D' oh dear erin dont even worry about it joui, erin's just gonna talk to tristan's blood splatter

dante with the haircut can the paranormal fix my vision too i would become an occultist for that how is this door STILL stuck who in there not-dead-bea isnt gonna freak out is she thats gonna be reallyyyyyyy

theres no way i would be opening one of these coffins after all the shit we just went through what if theres another spider woman in there joui with a shotgun... does this count as grave robbing is kaiser going to be haunted by even more spirits

dont worry kaiser i have dyslexia and i cant read cursive either its cursed SHOOTING THE COFFIN IS HILARIOUS WHAAAT WHY IS THERE A BLOOD ZOMBIEWHERE THE FUCK DID IT COME FROM ARTHURRRRRRR THIS HOUSE FUCKING SUCKS

wait i forgot thats how blood zombies work cellbit you fucker dont you dare did dante just try to hockey check the zombie joui doing an epic move nevermind this is not very friendly bea :( guyssssss you cant just keep her like this forever will she even go back to being not angry not to be that guy but even if you do manage to chain her up shes probably just gonna mutilate herself to get to you guys

doorways and hallways are the most dangerous enemies in ordem theres too many people climbing all over each other trigger discipline luciano????????????? joui you're so cool

thIS IS SO AWKWARD i just dont know if erin is the best person to be breaking this to fernando erin i dont know if you should be transcending right now but maybe this will be good for you

kaiser and erin got that energy like their parents know each other and wont stop talking in the aisle of a grocery store wait i forgot kaiser has that doll what is it FOR escolha..... WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK JOUI AND ERIN ARE GONNA KISS fernando, erin is the resident grenade and shotgun user she cant stay in the back

the longer they stay in this house the more i can see the actual players going crazy i love that joui's perfect series of events goes back to liz being alive hes so right got rolled by a door

do you think cellbit made the puzzles in this house like "these are kind of difficult but i think they can do it :)" and then dante is just forgetting to finish reading the damned diary and we've been stuck in this house for 4 episodes erin has the right idea blow it up LOL wait luciano is actually gonna let her

ARTHURRRRRRR so small its okay arthur you're a good person RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAA the arthur kaiser joui relationship making me violent

cellbit i dont like the face you made when fernando went to try and transcend sus DOLL ROOM wait i recognise this music wtf but the song im thinking of is from the calamidade soundtrack

EP 13 cory in the house theme song playing we're never leaving this house

o carente but its not really or maybe it is i dont actually know what the song is for in calamidade joui is not a fan of the doll room who is the eyeball who is the eyeball the drippy sound are the eyeballs the dolls god dammit kaiser at least arthur isnt looking joui vs a closet joui lost

is the eyeball related to death since its basically stealing time away from kaiser ill start fist fighting i still think the eyeball issue is connected specifically to kaiser and hes accidentally spreading it to other people but if thats true why can dante see them whats the connection GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH do they have to be told about it???? will lu and erin start seeing them now too

LIZ WOULD KNOW WHAT TO DO JOUI WAAAAAAAAAAA

cellbit doesnt believe in the power of the safari search engine someone needs to take luciano's gun away hes shooting everything

did daniel hartmann also write this book so glad we're reading the haunted doll book in the haunted doll room in the haunted house no way theres a portuguese test erin and dante dont know portuguese cursive writing defeats yet another player

hey can we figure out who cut the wires in the van thats yet another haunted house mystery unsolved WASHING MACHINE POG NEVERMIND 4 dolls 4 people that can see the eyesballs ive got it we have to sacrifice joui, arthur, dante, and kaiser portuguese defeats yet another player

THIS HOUSE IS IMPOSSIBLE do they have to take photos why is kaiser filling up the bathtub is he gonna take a bath erin's lighting incense to try and make the house smell nicer dante was climbing boxes eu sou luciano what the hell are joui and dante even doing

voce é um gênio arthur!!!! eu sei :))) JOUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII kaiser dont let arthur in that bathroom ??????? huge brain moment kaiser hang on hes about to fucking drown no way arthur is coming to rescue him alright nobody's allowed near water by themselves anymore what the fuck was that

whaAAAAAT thats crazy anyways jouixarthur?? also happy pride month FOUR DOLLS POGGGGGGGGG erin's not allowed to open any doors if she has to roll a sanity test she'll explode english jumpscare i can hear the drippinggggg

going off the name of the song from calamidade im going to assume all the ghost kids just want a hug and then we can leave no problem :) none of these people have ever talked to a kid in their lives wait the emo kid from across the street??? goth is a lifestyle joui

ah nao we're about to go kidnap the goth kid from across the street luciano might just be the absolute worst person to go and talk to some kid send arthur and joui they are by far the friendliest ?????????????? what do you mean luciano what do you MEAN erin also a good choice shes friendly happy pride month the chair moves incredible

please stop comparing your abs please im begging you stop please por favor pare por favor eu vou morrer guys you cant just bring this kid into the haunted house with luciano shirtless thank god

is this joui's first date this is horrific joui you're soooo this is going incredibly poorly already where are these kids parents cellbit playing three believable NPCs at once is so fun omg Hugo the little brother is MISSING??? joui dont threaten the 16 year old omg Hugo so small manga and snacks thats all he needs joui HATES teenagers joui is so cool to hugo

dante and luciano absolutely RUINING their cover guysssss you're scaring the 15 year olds DAMN JOUI absolutely rolled luciano amigos imaginarios.... bruxo...... hugo about to be kaiser and arthur's new lil bro dante HATES teenagers maybe tim is hiding in the washing machine actually maybe hes in the doll closet bro tim is 11??? they made it sound like hes 5

nevermind ive got it tim is hiding in the coffin tim better not be in the van theres a bea in it why the fudge is this kid in the van :(

im well aware that theres a monster in some season thats called the imaginary friend so tim is making me awfully nervous jesus christ do eduarda's parents know she can do this anyways horrible feeling one of these kids is gonna get possessed and they'll have to fight it

music picking up uh ohhhhh luciano listen i get it i also think they should kill not-dead-bea but this isnt a conversation you should be having with 4 kids in the room tim is one of you imaginary friends in the room with us

dont worry guys ive got it kian is currently possessing tim thats the solution ok the neighbour is kian ive got it for sure kian is everywhere hes in the sofa in the sink in your shoes kian is the neighbours dog ive got it all figured out INTERIOR DESIGN

if i read assombração forçada literally it definitely doesnt sound like a good thing wtf is a forced haunting kian sabe.... are we talking like they took all these live kids and made them possessed or something are there a bunch of kids buried under the house joui's having a brain blast alright ive got it all figured out for sure for real kian is being passed around to different kids bodies so that he never dies thats the solution KIAN IS OROCHIMARU LOLLLLL

dante i think you need to admit that some of your friends from the orphange are all fucked up now and have done really bad things

CATS KIAN IS A CAT IVE FIGURED IT OUT KIAN IS JENNIFER ooooooooooooooo arthurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr WAAAAAAAAA OW???? OUCHIES voce ta bem??? CLARO QUE NAO joui needs a rabies shot now cellbit if you hurt hugo im gonna be really upset ????????????????

daniel hartmann you motherfucker guiltiest man once alive and you deserve it what the hell was wrong with you

EP 14 MUITO BOA NOITE

erin with 21 sanity really doing well for herself the real boss of the house is the handwriting in these notes luciano and dante are getting rolled we still haven't unlocked that stupid laptop thats kinda awkward daniel has a whole fanbase waiting for a new book but he got chomped in half

someone get hugo away from the blood pile hes gonna start trying to steal some jennifer isnt like.... infecting them is she dante if the teenagers think you're cool then you are so cool cassiano probably wants your autograph wait so its not the cat ok ive got it the cat is obviously trying to protect them from the monster jennifer would never hurt anyone

kaiser is accidentally infecting everyone with the eyesballs somehow i know it we keep talking about time sus sus sus sus sus sus

ok ive read the last three paragraphs many many times and all ive gathered is this monster is following jennifer but it realised kaiser is super hot so now it wants to kiss him and also all of kaiser's friends and also ivete so the solution is kaiser and arthur take a nap while everyone hides and watches

ordem paranormal sleepover if theres only 16 cat eyes then that means one of the cats (JENNIFER) escaped idk about this one dante noooo arthur im sure jennifer isnt evil she just has an imaginary friend following her around and it wants to eat your face joui i dont know about this one 18 cat eyes jennifer is NOT haunted

joui quit being a bitch you're only carrying a drawer full of eyesballs what if we try to burn only 1 eyeball dante and kaiser defeat the singular eyeball joui burns the eyeballs this surely wont have a negative affect

o game cheiro LMAOO i cant stop thinking about the game cheiro now

i have the solution dante should sit ON TOP of the wardrobe then he can jump whatever comes out of it oh my god i thought cellbit was roleplaying someone muffled screaming but its arthur's phone ringing ivete :) wait doesnt ivete have the possibly haunted jennifer with her ARTHUR TELL IVETE TO TELL SOMEONE YOUR VAN IS FUCKED YOU GUYS ARE STRANDED

are we bringing ivete to the haunted house idk about this one guys joui wants his bow so bad WHAT WHAT WHAAAAAAAT YOU SAW WHAT IVETE YOU SAw wghaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAT YOU SAW HUH WHAT THE FUCK GUYSSSSSS the girls are fighting again o dear kaiser fernando this is really a horrible time to show up

ivete is here i have anxiety do we really bring jennifer in the house tho do we really bring ivete in the house tho aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa joui i love you you're such a little loser just let him hold the shotgun for 5 minutes nobody in the call trusts cellbit with jennifer IM SO WORRIED listen if i have to pick between ivete and jennifer i pick ivete every time please dont murder her cellbit

we're at the point where they're just threatening cellbit this is like the absolute worst thing i could be watching at 3:30 right before bed what the hell NOBODY HEARS ANYTHING cellbit's having the time of his life KAISER GETS UP???? WHAT HTHE FUCK IS THAAAAT THATS BEEN HAUNTING JENNIFER???????????? THATS BEEN HAUNTING KAISER AND ARTHUR AND IVETE????? DANIEL HARTMANN YOU ASSHOLE

cellbit it so hyped for this im so afraid wow what a nice heal dante oooooo erin using her energy kaiser was not ready if they let this thing escape im gonna wait they're bullying it ???????? QUE FODA IS RIGHT AI WAIT ARTHUR HAS 4 HP luciano remembers everything??????? we leave kaiser alone with fingers and not-kaiser okay OUCH NOT-ARTHUR IS CRAZY WITH IT REAL ARTHUR IS ALSO CRAZY WITH IT kaiser is getting rolled all because he took a nap DANTE CANT HIT SHITTTTT cellbit you YOUUUU 'isnt kaiser one of your important people?" youuuuuuuuuuu

joui stop getting shot by kaiser challenge failed 12 DAMAGE??? DANTE WITH ONE HEAL EARLIER porra ivete minha querida ???????????????????????????????????????????????????? erin. JOUIIIIII we're all failing everything today ivete is fucking nasty with it IVETTTEEEEE PLEEEASE KILL KAISER 2 cellbit you're gonna have to drag ivete out of guaxi's cold dead hands KAISER IS SO SLEEPY kaiser failing EVERYTHING kaiser 2 is fucking CRAZY HES SO STRONG HES IN THE MATRIX arthur rolled a one im gonna lose my brain my mind its all crumbling to dust kaiser rolled a 1 cellbit what the fuck

ivete putting in work FRAKAISER joui you arent allowed in the kaiser 2 fight you already lost dante a true healer about to start beating his patients to near death aaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAA luciano just demolished kaiser 2 HES STILL ALIVE???? NEVERMIND LETS GOOOO joui has broken free of his hallway prison kaiser killsteal

kaiser and arthur taking a little nap joui going to treat ivete :))))))))) no matter how many times cellbit tries to explain first aid it will never not be confusing jennifer i knew you werent evil just haunted sick tattoo arthur but im not really feeling it theres still ghosts up in here

EPISODE FIFTEEEEEEEN i have a bad feeling that if erin dies im going to be really sad how has this happened i kind of love her

kaisers taking a nap onnnnnn the floor arthur hugging im grthgbfdsahvgkjbldsav damn luciano straight to the point at least its a cool looking tattoo arthur tries to transcend with the tattoo and he just explodes oh kaiser is just laying on the ground with the espreitador

still cant get over the fact that daniel hartmann made this thing dude if i was him and i made these kinds of creatures without fully realizing i would also feel horrible

the doll face is kind of horrible get it away joui kaiser doesnt need more drugs he needs bedtime hes gonna have a heart attack "foi legal" ok mister i got shot in the chest OOP? KAISER AND JOUIIIIIIIIIIIII AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA this is so 'dante can you grab my shirt from the floor?'

ERIN CAN FIX THE VANNNNNNNN bea is still in the van danteeee you gotta do something about this erin you are so cool you fix that van you can do anything THE PIZZAS who the fuck stole a slice ivete payed for those erin why are you grinning like that VAN FIXED ERIN I LOVE YOU EVEN IF YOU ATE A SLICE OF PIZZA

the most van ride ever the sleeping passengers the bea the pizza mystery erin's about to crash the car because of the cheese bread this is gonna be so awkward when they get to the base SO awkward

fuck you kaiser you are a good person when bea was trying to kill you guys you didnt even try to hurt her IVETE I LOVE YOUUUUU WAAAAAAAAAAA bro ivete is actually gonna make me cry wtf health regen humungous we deserve this kaiser with the xqc sticc body type what are the odds that when dante tries to look into bea's mind its just screaming and agony verissimo is missing okaay

I LOVE ERIN erinnnnn you're breaking this in the worst way possible they dont know tristan is deaaaaad kalera is so cool dude

WHAT DO YOU MEAN MARCELA IS MATHEUS' MOM THERES THREE PEOPLE IN THIS CALL THAT JUST STRAIGHT UP BULLIED HIM flashback to alex sneaking matheus a note and the kid just reading it out loud

btw im still obsessed with how they say "hugo" in a brazillian accent thats amazing all hugo should be said like that

clarissa is here this is really awkward are you gonna tell her kaiser orrr oof

"HOW ARE YOU FEELING ARTHUR?" kaiser asks while punching him

cellbit stop smiling when you ask if dante is ready to hear bea's thoughts stop it nvm he sent it to break evil mestre

well i wasnt wrong WHOA WHOA WHA get dante outta there what the hell fuck thats :(

that was horrific kaiser theres alot of people locked up in the base prison joui wants to meditate with kaiser sooooo bad if anyone offered to meditate with him he might cry i fucking love tetris

>:( :(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

dante is in unconscious jail OH JOUI thats so awkward you understand what has to be done arthur is TWENTY EIGHT hes so young thats fucked up you stole his whole family from him hes still in his twenties MY BODY IS A TEMPLE

oh. that sucks joui you wouldnt hit a blind man would you

this is so awkward for everyone else living in the ordem prison that can hear this i just think we dont go back to the orphanage?????? that place sucks???? kaiser about to gain the ritual of turning someone into a puppet kaiser thinks omitting details and lying are two different things very interesting surveillance ritual

damn ordem makes me want to punch my monitor

wait DAMN OH SHIT i didnt even realiese until kaiser fucking said something just now but they ARE listening and watching from the symbol tattoed on arthur thats fucked if i had to guess its the sect of masks that did it???? to watch joui?? but strange that the doll face with the same symbol was in the mansion unless the house and the sect of masks are connected somehow

i feel like its better to tell arthur, like who cares if the people listening know, itll be easier to hide shit if arthur understands .... the neighbours? im telling you the neighbour's dog is secretly kian

im a big fan of pizza thats been sitting out for too long thats my toxic trait erin rich as heck we wouldnt make dante sleep on the floor would we hes kind of depressed right now JOUI damn joui they're making dante breakfast and everything kaiser you're being a freak .....we havent heard from grandma in a while

jouiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii u stay here u little

EPISODE 16 WOOOOOOOOO the kaiser thumbnail is wicked

we live in a world where someone or something has definitely gone and dug up bea's body but thats just my opinion

"hm" JOUIIIIIIIIIII JUST HAVE A SLEEPOVER WITH ARTHUR E KAISER "of course, you slept with dante" JOUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII kaiser is too smart brain too big

ooooooo agathinha foi mal is right arthur's fucking giggle bro stop agatha so mad he got a tattoo without her maybe we ask joui for advice before trying to remove the tattoo "can you hold my hand" arthur makes me want to punch my monitor 11 DAMAGE LOOOL

CARALHO TÁ MUITO FODA joui's so mad hes transcending

they're gonna get back to the house and the kids wandering around it

the computer guys are so funny i think if you turn on an actual light in their room they'll all shrivel up and die letícia is nice but if a strong wind comes she will blow away into dust

to be clear i would steal from the ordem just to see what would happen missed opportunity to see ivete go on a manhunt for who stole her supplies fernando SUCKS at pool joui you're such a little loser i love you kaiser you have to teach arthur how to actually play tetris he doesnt get it

we back in canada baby get the poutine i just noticed the name of this episode :)))))))))) its my favourite ordem song you dont understand

THE OLD PEOPLE DIIIIEDDDD KIAN THE DOG KILLED THEM AND STOLE THEIR BODIES fresta amongus no way we were talking to ghosts bro they ate ghost cake erin's mask is awesome the knowledge and energy guys were kissing in here aren't they supposed to hate each other when did luciano get here

guys kaiser is going through a crisis he's trying to change himself for the better but hes really self conscious about it

HUUUUGGOOOOO hugo dont add random adults on whatsapp even if they like g-force joui would fight a teenager if their name was cassiano

mmmmmmm coffin soup aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa naaaaaaaaaaao lodo preto burn it burn it burn it burn it tchau lodo preto nevermind nevermind nevermind tchau lodo preto arthur dont fucking touch it ...espiral escape room mestre THE PASSWORD IS KIAN THE PASSWORD IS KIAN dammit the password is olho the password is olho

joui you get away from that spiral corpse THE PASSWORD IS HUGO the password is door 4 students desks amongus the password is four the blackboard is haunted haunted chiclete

wowie sheet music if they zoom in on it more i could read it wait thats THE SONG THATS THE BEST SONG some death guy about to come punch them all

i feel like ive lost the plot i need someone to summarize leonardo gomes for me, we think he's kian right??? like his body is kian and we're trying to track leo down to find kian because theyre the same person technically right if not then im watching an entire different show lmao

bmail musicinha if fernando gets fucked up like bea did does the same thing happen to luciano since they share a body or not because they dont really share a mind

its a familiar song to joui... to be clear this is the best song ever dangerous song ?????? cellbit you stop that play the song again joui its so good i dont care if its sending us to hell or whatever

it is boa cellbit fuck you if this song sends you into a coma im screwed oop oop oop oop THAT THING IS AWESOME WHAT THE HELL WICKED COOL SO COOL death has the best monsters

eu fracassei 24 damage is crazy what the hell ah nao she just started the monsters second phase joui get the fuck outta the way erin's demolishing this guy arthur's nice with it luciano playing the drums joui that was so cool theyre bullying this dude

I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHATS ON THE LAPTOPPPPPPP

stepped on a lego normal kids room with a summoning symbol in it wait havent we heard if tirigan before TIM'S IMAGINARY FRIEND?? thats not good your imaginary friend should not be friends with other people ooooo arthur so smart liz would be so proud JOUI SAID IT TOO WAAAA

????????????????????????????????????????????????? alvaro was all over the place also CRAZY that alex doesnt get noticed in this paper dudes so unlucky even in death number 1 alvaro augusto hater btw what a guy

LOL THE SKULL luciano how did you not break it into 1 million pieces no way the body were we supposed to burn this thing plEASE DONT THROW A GRENADE TOWARDS KAISERRRRR this song is so good ill actually never get over it joui is escaping the hallway very smart hallways and doorways very dangerous kaiser about to chuck himself down the stairs

joui not jealous joui never jealous someone should touch the sludge for fun they're gonna have to fight the corpse a third time but now it'll deal burn damage erin almost died on the stairs

LAPTOPPPPPPPPPPPP POGGGGGGGGGGG WE MADE ITTTTTT WINDOWS XP UH OH THAT NOTEPAD DOESNT LOOK TOO GOOD anyways my favourite element is death kaiser wanted to hack the email so bad we really moved into a haunted house and THEN adopted a child not what i would do but whatever

'good luck surviving until then' okay buddy dude this guy doesnt stay away THERES MORE are these the dead kids ISNT GRENADE THREE THE DESASTRE ROLL JUST WONDERING JUST CURIOUS erin is these guys' worst nightmare he rolled a 1 against her how sad AI JOUI FUCKIN SLIPPED OR SEOMTHING HIS INSIDES ARE GETTING TOSSED LIKE A SALAD arthur and fernando jamming out who even cares about death skeletons

luciano fucking sucks at playing the guitar foda demais ITS OUTSIIIIDE ARE THE KIDS ACROSS THE STREET SEEING THIS SHIT HUGO LOOK OUT THE WINDOW wwe superstar luciano hitting a frog splash

joui and erin you two are so lame together i say lovingly joui is not jealous at all ever about any attention that arthur gives to anyone else JOUI THATS SO RUDE KKKK DONT JUDGE HER 3 WORDS SHE KNOWS IN JAPANESE

carro chegando who the fuck is here go away this house is haunted as heck off topic but eita is such a good word IVETE GO HOME WHATS WRONG WITH YOU oh she's dante's uber driver

EP 17 tamo junto

dante you missed the party cool sunglasses tho someone should probably keep an eye on dante so he doesnt take a tumble down the stairs yes ivete please leave the haunted house probably wants to eat you WAAAAA I WAS RIGHT I WAS RIGHT THEY STOLE BEA'S BODY was it gal or the mask guys tho gal is more connected to the orphanage and also hes A FUCKING ASSHOLE

ghost footprints kaiser's never seen a shoe in his life arthur making sure dante doesnt take a tumble down the stairs joui also but im pretty sure hes just being jealous again not the bathroom again :DDDDD

fresta amongus "what do you do?" i shut the door and leave the house get a nice minimum wage job and forget i ever worked for the ordem nevermind i run in and try to grab the book out of her hands to see what happens "ghosts dont exist" okay joui jesussss what ythr fuck

really like how even tho dante is blind now he can still use any ritual he needs to, he doesnt just get written off as useless

maybe the book they need is the BIBLE nevermind daniel you fucker wait that could be such a good idea, turn the water main off, turn on all the taps, and then turn the water main back on no problem no drowning

joui sus joui what were you planning last night sus joui where are you going sus joui why are you the thumbnail for this episode sus joui why have you been so weird since the sect of masks incident sus happy pride month

erin thats fucking creepy this house is a mess are we gonna be cleaning it after this is all over succ stop laughing at cellbit's succ rp WE GET TO SWIM NEVERMIND THE POOL WATER IS NASTY no way we walk up to the pool this is how the entire group dies bro surely the kids across the street are seeing this shit

hello i have a terrible fear of drowning and deep water this is awful THAT THING IS COOL SHES GOOEY 'only kaiser can shoot me' you stop that bullying the pool woman ??????dante OW???? JOUI???? jou you are so in the way is there any way you can move slightly to the left thats horrific luciano how is she still aliiiive mmmmm tripas dante you are just so far away nvm you are now much closer joui is getting ROLLED OH YEAH LUCIANO IS DROWNING KAISER IS BEING SMOTHERED

they're getting absolutely demolished by a swimming pool why does this woman have so much HEALTH DANTEEEE NAAAAAO LMAOOOOOOO LUCIANO IS FUCKING DYINGGGGG

what is this scenario cellbit has created were they supposed to go outside and fist fight the pool because this is going so so so badly was there a better way to go about it YEAAAAAH ARTHURRRRRR

LUCIANO ATE THE FUCKING KEY THEYRE ALL PUKINGGGG

"whispers??????? jouiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii THE KIDS WERE WATCHING YESSSSSSS arthur heal steal this house is a horrible mess what do they actually do with once finished

IS THIS THE LAST DOOOOOOOR ARE WE FINALLY GETTING INNNNN i forgot dante is blind this room is awesome

oooo this kid was pissed WHOA WHOA LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOO THATS CRAZYYYYYYY yum blood symbol hate those guys arthur just breathed into kaiser's ear we're not gonna go bother this random guy are we the skate doesnt have a symbol how uncool i want to transcend with the skate

arthur, joui, and kaiser are DISGUSTING together i love them happy............... pride.................... month...................

:) im smiling through the pain joui you stop this you arent going anywhere they should just go smoke some of the weed in the living room next time joui goes to pee the sect of masks are gonna crawl out the toilet and kidnap him

kaiser's nicotine withdrawal is actually just a cover because hes afraid of losing another person hes close to but its okay ill just believe hes really mad about having to buy more cigarettes

why do you say that like you know you have no choice on if luciano allows you to come back or not fernando im gonna break something

we're gonna go ruin this random guy's life arthur if you werent driving this could be a three way hug its impossible for us to have to fight two haunted apartments in one season

fourth floor.... simply i would not answer the door if there were 6 random people standing outside it ooooooooooooooo joui i dont think frederico wants to relive this guyssss hes freaking out maybe we should have brought him some water or a snack

i think frederico needs to find a new therapist probably one that works for the ordem lmao i thought kaiser was gonna start raiding his kitchen we just showed up at this guy's house, ruined his day, and left kian sabe OQ QUE O KIAN SABE no way we're actually leaving someone rob his house or something

sus the whispers also want to stop at a drive thru equipe e WAAAAAAAAA ...this music is...nice rakin staring suspiciously at cellbit is me rn

?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

what the fuck

EPISODE 18 what the fuck

what the fuck

luis talking about an osnf fancam where am i

im so sad but this intro slaps every time THERES JOUI HES IN THE INTRO WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

who is tirigan also isnt the house still haunted

wow i wonder who left this note gfmnksbonçfjksbgrtfsnkjvgbjifostbgpgnfbsjgfs im fine

大丈夫

AGATHAAAAAAAA new csgo knife skin just dropped RITUAL STORE IS AWESOME if joui was here he would be so mad he would also buy something out of spite QUE FODA too bad its not the skate

o violão de ódio incontrolável sounds awesome 44% paranormal exposure kinda nuts arthur kinda crazy kinda know alot arthur glow up next enemy they meet he's gonna bulldoze them dante kinda tense maybe go sit in the sun for a bit absorb the energy

MATH money is difficult you have so much but then you buy 2 things and suddenly you have none kaiser hates shopping i would also buy the spiral ring you can do it fernando i believe in you

wait hes actually doing it pop off fernando you earned this nvm you're still giving it to luciano but at least the other side doesn't hate your ass anymore

i stopped this episode for a whole week because i was so sad about joui where am i who am i i love agatha

i would collect healing rituals like pokemon cards are there occultists selling rituals on ebay we are all so paranormally exposed but how far can you go before it starts to become not such a good thing bea's brain became alphabet soup sooo

WHERE IS YOUR GRANDMA ERIN IS SHE A HACKER IS SHE DEAD IS SHE A ZUMBI DE SANGUE is she kian kian sabe kian out here sleeping with your grandma erin did you know that

question can i use someone else to transcend and learn a ritual like if i drag arthur into the circle and try to transcend with his tattoo do i learn that same ritual also does arthur explode if this happens

to be clear if you could steal a ritual off of Agatha she would either kill and dismember you OR start loading you up with as many rituals as possible just to see what would happen "take this one and this one and this one and-"

agatha and arthur make me want to punch my monitor oh :( agatha :( what are we even talking about bolo de coco ive lost the plot

kian body hopping like orochimaru he'd better not have a thing for snakes arthur doesn't know shit

reading is HARD if you kill kian's body does he swoop into the next one is there a curse mark that he puts on prospective bodies to use once he loses one do you know who else does that

wow i sure do understand this journal perfectly thanks arnaldo fritz but actually the last page hes translating the STONE and its talking about the elements i know this because i can read HUGO????? hugo just stopped my train of thought completely one of the kids is possesed its tim isnt it tim are you housing kian in your soul

HUGOOOOOOOOOOOOO NAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOO cellbit said you guys are taking too long so this kid is gonna get it joui is hiding in the fridge like a freak

COMO NAO VELHO no illegal weapon modifications allowed i like how cellbit always has to reassure them that they wont get in a car crash unless they roll a 1 they're so afraid

poggers neblina poggers névoa not poggers sangue awkward not to be that guy but the guard is gonna turn into a blood zombie i dont like this song if that one fucker is here im gonna where hugo where hugo where hugo this is not a public bus go away

nvm the car crash fears have been realized oooooooo were leaving the van idk about this one guys occultists hate canada naaaao this freak maybe he's just taking his dog for a walk LMAAAAAAOOOO this guy monologuing and kaiser just 'what the fuck are you even talking about'

this thing is about to ruin everyone's lives wait hes so cool we're so dead HIS CHARACTER MODEL IS COOOOOL TEN DAMAGE :DDDDDDDDDDDDD dante just ruined this guy's life so smart water beats fire or something OW OUCH OW RUINED KAISER'S LIFE HIS DAY HIS FACE luciano idk about getting closer to that guy

i wonder what the inside of the enpap's mind sounds like slapped erin and kaiser the fuck outta the way HE LOVES IT luciano this is so awkward for you this guy's favourite movie is the terminator

wait so was that mark put on arthur originally by gal because how else would this guy know that they had been here

erinnnnnnn just got bulldozed ARTHUR YOU SUCK THAT WAS THE WORST BUT I LOVE YOU ANYWAYS KAISER GFUCKING ATE THOSE HITS if you kill the enpap and it falls on kaiser its gonna squash him like bread "é o kaiser" kaiser is busy dying fuck you his lungs look like a wet towel right now wow erin that was so nice but also you have 2 health

we all suck at dodging KAISERRRRR ERINNNNNNNNNNNN dante doesnt know what the hell is going on btw enpap smol NVM DANTE ACTUALLY RUINED THIS GUY'S LIFE

:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD leave kaiser alone "im going to take care of kaiser" kaiser is getting kidnapped right now im gonna im gonna gimgf njgtbtrnsdfov fdeajvrfgfdxhb trsevlfd sbvhgutfirodsbgngjfskblnbjgfskibo

arthurrrrrrrGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAA bruno you bitch thats your friend hello hello hello am i crazy hello can we leave kaiser alone hello

fucking hell i need like 10 minutes after that

clara is fucking nuts also where did she come from i wasnt looking i was in great distress EH?mommy hey where are the kids from across the street so bea had the answers but because of kian and birds we lost it HOW'S THIS GUY ALIVE luis is so mad damn clara that sucks this guy is nuts :D

wait this song is awesome luciano fuck him up you wanted this so bad nvm you missed he's doing knife tricks

marca um símbolo oh no :) personally i wouldnt step in front of a dante that's aiming a gun bruno sneezed when he swung at the guy nice luciano um ouch how nice how cool i hate the blood element btw this guy is the WhySoSerious emote

punch him in the mouth nice luciano nvm you got fucked up maybe you should sit the rest of this fight out buddy draws a symbol on himself bro's about to pull a hidan hopefully nobody here is asuma

so can we heal over these marks so he cant use them orrrrrr UNDER THE FRIDGE?? we gotta start moving fridges in every house now

so glad we're back in the house also where are the neighbour kids huh what did you do with them cellbit we made ramen next to this fridge and everything never realized there was a basement underneath

'meu enpapzinho meu filho' ok cellbit

EPISODE 19 cadê o hugo

this is like a field trip everyone gets a nametag so mestre doesn't lose them

this song makes me feel so knowledgeable it only took me 2 tries to spell that what if bruno tripped and fell farther into the hall that would suck hihihihihihihi

maybe we don't let bruno grab any more papers KKKKK uh ohh....

god dammit guys we all got locked out ??????? impossível ser what succal?????? this thing about to kiss dante or what can we not just shoot this one anthony is making it sound like we cant just kill her is she the key

big group in a hallway this is going to be horrible wild choice to wade in the disease water someone's going to get a parasite are there mosquitos down here have we had our vaccines

?????????????????????? THAT SUCKS BRUNO THAT SUCKS THATS HORRIBLE i would fall over and die pretty sure luciano just saved all their asses cachorro de sangue WOOF WOOF

these knowledge guys are kinda crazy how are the hypnotized death guys somehow the most sane ones in the series so far Ike arent you cold down here without a shirt kaiser rolls a 1 great start bruno fofo dont die tho BRUNO???? THAt WAS THE WORST ATTACK EVER KKKKKK OW KAISER LOL ike went and took all of kaiser's luck with shooting

erin flanking she's playing valorant ???????? ?????? ????????? ??????? ???? ????????? ???????? can we all keep our clothes on in the hunted sewers please bruno i have the solution just kick ike in the knee you're right there wait hes actually trying to kick his knee in thats awesome

surely they dont have to fight bruno later at the end of this dungeon

arthur doesnt miss except when he does

no way why are the children in the knowledge sewer why cant 6 people walk as quietly as 1 why cant we walk on our tippy toes HUGO THATS A SICK GAMING ROOM HUGO WHO IS YOUR FRIEND IN THE GAMING ROOM STOP TALKING TO STRANGERS

HUUUUUUGOOOO WHYYYYY this is the coolest thing that's ever happened to hugo luciano hugo cant pause he's playing an online game wait his name does say lucifer thats awesome so smart dante if hugo dies in the game he dies in real life

hi mia this is a really bad time like a really bad time like you couldn't have picked a worse time 4 d6 is insane hugo i love you omg kaiser and hugo gaming together this is just a game cellbit would actually play

is anyone writing down the directions kaiser is going this could be important rakin looks so suspicious of this game the enemies are about to come crawling out the screen succal you're ruining the gamer vibes OW goodbye sanity

tirigan, the last living escripta?????????????? until kian grows enough?????? TIM IS KIAN TIM ISNT TIRIGAN YOUR IMAGINARY FRIEND tirigan is tim's imaginary friend right im not mixing this up i cant just go to the wiki and look and i dont feel like going back to episode whatever to check i could be very wrong

nvm i went back to check and tim is talking about tirigan dude kian is possessing his body mega sus shelf why they have all these pictures why they have cris and daniel and IS THAT ALEX FROM SEASON 1 LOLLLL

ERINS GRANDMA IS ALIVE SHES A HACKER FOR THE BAD GUYS WHY ISNT TRISTAN'S FACE SCRATCHED OUT thiago :( all these ordem members but not veríssimo am i wrong for not trusting him tristan's head got opened like a hotdog bun hes not alive

o anfitrião....

i changed my mind kian is erin's grandma maybe these are all the bodies kian wants to save so he can just hop between them when he needs to after they die idk what you're gonna do with daniel tho he kinda got ate

check behind liz's picture or else please check alex's photo i have the solution erin's grandma is the host UE????????? meu deus we suck at this puzzle damn they really stole fernando's body kinda messed up kinda :( bit aggressive luciano but you've earned it

LOLLLL KAISER THATS FUICKED UP HUUUUGOOOOOOOOOO

19 SANITY arthur you just saved hugo's small teenager brain did they kidnap erin's grandma or did she trip and fall into a chaos lair and become imbued with the power of chaos

can we burn alvaro's body not because he might be haunted or anything but just because he's an asshole DONT PANIC DONT PANIC DONT PANIC THEYRE LOST HLEP HELP haunted shelf

wait i love the emo knowledge duo nvm they're being kinda rude nice one kaiser awesome roll ritual of hate on bruno.... :D erin i wouldnt get in his line of sight dante see nothing LOL HUGO get away from here kish is getting rolled not to be that guy but i think we should be focusing erica

oh no that was her best friend sorry erica LOLLLLLL KAISER RUNNNNN ARTHURRRR NAAAAOOO erin back up erin back up cellbit rolling 1000 dice for bruno's attack OW BRUNO bruno this is really awkward you just fucked kaiser up

no arthur it was a great idea everyone just decided to just hang out around the pissed off bruno

erin vs ammo btw wheres tim wow i understand that paper perfectly the succal is crazy with it WE'RE LOST not lost massive puzzle moment we are puzzling daniel's ass should go on a statue that's called "guilt"

YEAH EDUARDA WHERE IS TIM they're gonna open the door and there's going to be an exorcism to separate kian from tim it's a shame bruno is a cellbit npc so he's probably going to die horribly

can we just kill this anthony guy already i dont like him

gal is the last person tim should be hanging out with

the succ+ is strong against both metagaming and grenades erin's about to go CRAZY NICE DAMAGE ARTHUR NICE isnt knowledge good against energy can we read it a book ive figured it out erin's grandma is the succ+

erin if your gonna go mad at least go try to take anthony out with you

ERIN ROLLS A 1 THATS CRAZYYYYYYYYYYY

dante hates the energy woman he hates the succ++ wtf

erin... :D what :D no way anthony is still alive can someone go kill him THANK YOU LUCIANO kaiser hes so dead his brain is goo oops lucifer and erin are kind of friends arent they

arthur and kaiser paranormal exposure makes me kinda nervous :D go roll around on the symbol on the ground see what happens

kalera you're so cool

erin's still in the ending credits its not over till its over

EP 20 I JUST WANT TO SEE KIAN COME CRAWLING OUT OF TIM'S CORPSE

its been so long

rakin can you actually see luis actually getting to cosplay this time pop off bro just dont die im mentally prepared for erin to become dust

arthur and kaiser kinda matching kinda cute kinda wish joui was here to match with them :)))))))))))))

[yakumtsaki]

Welcome, dear readers, to part 1 of the finale to the BackupKingdom2 saga! We’re in our final ambition now, let’s check how Liz’s post-divorce-bloodbath is going..

Oh yes, excellent. Our path to death-achievement-glory has been paved with so many executions that wherever I look I see npcs crying..

..comforting each other..

..and in Agnes' case, coming straight to Liz to.. ask for mercy for the populace I guess?? Bruh. I can't believe we even brought down AGNES, truly this is the saddest kingdom on earth. Amazing job, Liz, you've definitely earned your place in the tyrant hall of fame!

Now a lesser player would be like "oh, maybe we should chill a little on the insane tyrant thing, finish the Pirate/Noble arc cause we've been dragging this war out so the pirates/guildsmen would keep spawning and it should have ended like 20 quests ago" and true, we could just end it, we ran a very effective operation around here, shoutout to MVPs Donius and Bellinda and their 'seductive' legendary traits:

They bedded them and Liz beheaded them, the power of teamwork! So one could say that we should consider raising kingdom morale now because everyone is so depressed but I think, if anything, now is the time to ramp it up and go for some of the other morally questionable achievements! Like Machiavelli said, you should commit all your atrocities at once! What do you think, Liz? Ready to get atrocious?

-OH FUCK YEA, I’M ENRAGED, I DROPPED MY FIDDLE IN THE PIT AND NOW I HAVE TO WAIT FOR THE SERVANT TO GET ME A NEW ONE!! WHY DOES EVERYTHING ALWAYS HAPPEN TO ME >:(

Aw I’m sorry Liz, but I’m sure you the upcoming suffering of your subjects will cheer you up!

-Ok motherfuckers, by order of the Crown aka ME -you hear that Rae?? ME, NOT YOU. God I want to execute you so bad, fucking ingrate, do you remember what rags you were wearing when I hired you??  

Let’s get this back on track, Liz.

-Right, so by order of the Crown, Magus Olivia and Spymaster Spainot are given COMPLETE LEGAL IMMUNITY to do whatever the fuck they want in the interest of earning achievements, so don’t you people come crying to me cause I don’t give one tiny chinchilla crap about your health and livelihoods. If you need me for something actually important, I'll be at the gates, executing anyone who doesn't like my fiddle playing.

-Oh man, this folksy peasant hat isn’t protecting my ears enough.

-THOUGHT I WOULDN’T HEAR YOUR LITTLE MURMUR, DID YOU  -YOUR MAJESTY NO I ONLY MEANT MY EARS WERE COLD -WELL ALL OF YOUR BODY’S ABOUT TO BE COLD NOW! CONSTABLE, THROW THIS PEASANT IN THE PIT

-Death marker? I hardly know 'er!

So the Constable npc has this little Billy Elliot subplot going, I'm pretty sure he has the 'drunkard' fatal flaw because he was always at the tavern so I had Bellinda try to hire him to perform in one of her plays just to see what would happen and it actually worked, and now he moonlights as an actor! It's cute but it also takes forever for him to come arrest people.

-THEY LOVE ME ❤️😁 -CONSTABLE WHATSYOURNAME, COME OVER HERE AND DO YOUR FUCKING JOB OR YOU'RE NEXT FOR THE PIT

-No one knows what it's like to be the bad man, to be the sad man, when someone dies😢

In the background you can see that Bellinda just got a pregnancy bump, it’s her lovechild with Donius, I for real can’t keep these two apart. Anyway, the time has come..

..to unleash Magus Olivia onto the populace.

-You know what, I'd rather not, this book is finally getting good and I'm sick of cursing peasants, it doesn't even drop their mood that much..

Oh no, Olivia my beloved, we're not cursing them, we're going for the 'Well Done' achievement!

-NO WAY.

WAY.

-Won't I be executed??

You have immunity! You can do whatever you want!! And, AND, once you complete it, because I know it's tiring, I'll give you a magic skeletal parrot as a gift!! Edward got all the materials for it while treasure-hunting, you'd think I'd let him keep it but that's not the kind of shop I'm running here.

-This is my face of pure, childlike happiness!

Good lord, it’s terrifying, please don’t look at me like that.

-Alright, time to roll down my sleeves so they look more sinister and do this thing.

You can do it, Olivia!

-Of course I can, save your reassurance for the flops that need it.

-I.. cast.. INFERNO!

...

-What?

I mean really, those are the words, "I cast inferno"? Can't you say something with more evil magical flair?

-Not when I have to cast it 80 fucking times I can't.

-IT BURNS, IT BURNSSSSS

Oh how the tables have turned, usually it's the witch that gets burned, huhu! Did you hear that, Olivia? Did you like my joke??

-Oh, it's beautiful!

Well it wasn't one of my best-

-Not you, you needy moron, the sight of burning flesh! I can't wait to do this 79 more times!

Alright, so everyone in the tavern has been turned into a chicken nugget, time to get some rest and check in with Spainot!

-Amazing news, Rodolfo, I just got royal permission to unlawfully lock up and interrogate whoever I want for the achievements!!!

-Darling, no offense, but aren't you a bit too shit at your job for that? -WHAT????

-FUCK YOU RODOLFO YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS OF MY SUCCESS -I WISH I WAS JEALOUS OF YOUR SUCCESS, THEN YOU'D BE SUCCESSFUL AND I WOULDN'T BE MARRIED TO A BROKE LOSER

-And then he says the only reason he hasn't dumped me is he doesn't wanna be a rando npc while Batshit Liz is on an execution spree, can you believe this bullshit? How can anyone be so hurtful??

-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA NO NO PLEASE DON'T HAVE THIS CHINCHILLA MAUL ME I'LL GIVE YOU WHATEVER YOU WANT

-How about you give me some marital advice, are you even listening?! Ugh.

That's right, while Olivia is inferno-ing the peasants, I've sicced Spainot on the nobility, specifically all those foreign diplomats that are always hanging in the reception hall, lagging up the place. We're going for the 100 interrogations achievement and we’ve installed a nice spiky torture chair right in the middle of the hall to save time! Now this is how we keep every stratum of society terrified enough to not realize that the person in charge is.. uh.. well you know:

-DANCE TO MY FIDDLE, PIRATE, DANCE!

-I AM!!!!!

-DANCE MORE ENTHUSIASTICALLY. ALL THE WAY TO THE PIT

After a couple days and several locations I feel we’re pretty close to 80 infernos!

I’d say we’ve burned a good 50-60% of the population at this point, everywhere I look I see singed townies-

-so we take this little barbecue to the palace because we’ve ran out of peasants and it’s time to start burning the foreign dignitaries. And it’s a good thing we do, because Olivia meets Nyrexis the Dragon!!!! 

Nyrexis is the human form of the dragon from a hilar quest where there’s a dragon in the kingdom and you can either befriend it or slay it, I had Bellinda befriend it:

So if you complete the befriend route of the quest, the human form of the dragon appears in town and is in love with whoever did the quest, in this case Bellinda. I am of course not about to waste Dragonfu on Bellinda’s basic ass, plus I feel Olivia is kind of a dragon with all the people she’s been burning so they have a lot in common! 

We dazzle Dragonfu with a coin trick! True magic at work.

-OMG IT WAS BEHIND MY EAR THE WHOLE TIME -I KNOW!

Good God, all of Olivia’s ‘happy’ expressions are terrifying, just don’t smile ever again, you’re too evil for it, you’re gonna scare the dragon away!

Or not!!!!

 AWWWWW 🐲❤️🔮

You know what, fuck it, let’s lock it down, when it’s right it’s right!

-Burn stuff with me forever?? -I WILL!!!!

-We are gathered here today, under threat of fiery death, to join two unholy abominations in holy matrimony. Yes, the irony is not lost on me. 

AW CONGRATS GUYS <3333 The wizard tower is so small and family un-friendly and Olivia is so unmaternal but come on, like I’m not gonna have her reproduce with a fucking dragon.

Back to Spainot, we’ve hit a slight bump, mainly that this Snordwich lord is proving fucking impossible to torture. 

-Um.. Are you enjoying this??? -Sure am, bad boy, but why don’t we take this somewhere more private already?

Wtf, stop sexually harassing the innocent person who’s torturing you! Does no one around here have any sense of humanity anymore??

-Come on, Spainot, throw some flesh-eating rodents at him! -I’M BUILDING UP TO IT, RAE, GAWD. No one likes a back-seat torturer!

-HA, who’s the loser now, Rodolfo? Rodolfo?? RODOLFO

Ya Spai I don’t know how to tell you this, but I’m pretty sure he left while you were interrogating, I haven’t seen him in like 3 days.

-WHAT. So Olivia completes one achievement and gets a dragon wife and a magic skeletal bird and I complete three and get dumped?!

Well what do you want from me, I don’t make the rules!

-YES YOU DO

Can we move on, please? And Olivia had a very rough go of it-

-she got burned in some rando quest and looked positively karma-stricken after, inferno-ing left and right while sporting this look! She deserves a magic bird!

Congrats on your success and 4 kids, Olivia! 

-I love this skeleton bird more than I thought it possible to ever love something.

-Gee, thanks mom. 

We had leftover bones so here, Spainot, you get a magic bird too.

-A bone parrot is little comfort when you’ve lost the only bone that matters! Why Rodolfo, whyyyyy!!!!!!!!!

Oh I don’t know, probably because you challenged him to duels 3 times a day?

-No, that can’t be it.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but you look like a man who has nothing to live for?

-Yea, I certainly don’t.

So you wouldn’t mind like, jumping into the pit multiple times so you can get the parts we need for the hardest achievement in game aka Legendary Doomsword?

-Rodolfo had one of those too, it was legendary and now that it’s gone I’m doomed!!!

Ok ya ENOUGH metaphors about Rodolfo’s absent penis, although they really are writing themselves. We’ll get him back! If you survive all the pit jumping that is. Join us next time for part 2: Legendary Doomsword!

[misstalwyn]

FORBIDDEN WEST THOUGHTS 2, ELECTRIC BOOGALOO

I’m literally on the dot at 50.2 percent completion so I figure it’s a good time bc idk what plot could follow what I know now, so

SPOILERS AGAIN

Ok, listen, y’all know Avad’s #1 in my heart but HOLY FUCK does Kotallo make a challenge for the throne!!

I don’t know how they keep making all the different varieties of ideal™️ men but goddamnit does Aloy keep finding them! Don’t be selfish girl leave some for the rest of us!! 🥺

he does such a quick heel turn from “ugh the chief is making me help an outlander” to “hello commander reporting for duty” AND I! JUST!!

KOTALLO!!!

love me a man that will wrestle a machine with chainsaws for teeth and also demand chocolate frosting as a ration

“That was an unkind comparison” YOUR HONOR, I LOVE HIM

it was a really great tone/motivation to have that whole plot just be “let’s go take this asshole down a peg”

and WHERE is aloy learning to curse so much now?? i’m not crazy, right? she’s telling people off left and right! i love it but goddamn, i think rost would be PISSED lol

can I just say, the Tenakth are a pretty fascinating group for a violent bunch. They’re just historians with a fixation on military doctrine! If they just stopped killing each other over everything, they’d really have the mettle to challenge the Carja

(But pls don’t do that Avad is really trying to keep the peace YALL 😭)

anyways I really liked how their section went, and I only did a couple side quests after the kulrut and haven’t touched the arena, so we’ll see if it impresses me even more

The Utaru I initially really liked, but then I realized that was just Zo selling them really well bc a lot of their npcs were rude and their leadership don’t seem to believe in having any agency, soooo

I can see why Zo just completely lost faith in them immediately lmao

Again tho, didn’t do any post-main story missions there yet, so we shall see!

Kue was cool, tho! I would go hang out with that settlement more if they get more quests tbh

I will say I thought Beta’s defection was pretty clever, idk how I knew the whole thing with the 237 immediately lol but I will happily take my pride on that one

I don’t feel bad but also kinda feel bad for laughing at the immortal woman with centuries of tech at her fingertips just to be stabbed to death by a tribal dude with a knife 😂

all that money and still no sense!!

but Beta’s issues, man

MAN,,,,

I’m well past her breakdown by now too and yknow her deal must be beyond complex if everyone in that base and Aloy included has been thru some kind of lasting trauma, and they’re all just throwing their hands up at her

I hate to meme about it but when i get to meet tilda i’m just gonna be like, “look at this clone you made, she’s got anxiety”

Anyways, I hope someone can get her some good help bc idk if GAIA is designed for therapy lol

(They SHOULD get her a real name, first things first!)

I’ve complained about the pacing/freedom of movement enough so far, but I’m still very confused at the why/where’s/how’s of it?

Like, the leveling up through the base felt fine, nothing was head and shoulders above me and they only threw the big bois at you w/the plot

But by the kulrut, I was starting to get side missions & errands that were 5-10 levels above me, in areas with super aggressive machines I was very unprepared for

and then the tremortusk mission felt very…. Easy? And I realized I was actually OVERLEVELED for it?? even tho everything else in the area wasn’t???

I don’t understand how the plot can be pushing me forward so much, and yet here I am at tide’s reach getting level 20 side missions at level 41, even tho I just fought a level 40 vampire bat!!

Like, what! How are you supposed to get this far and be simultaneously babied and bullied? HOW??

idk, I felt like HZD had it right just having each area set at a certain difficulty, so you could just mentally sort it out like, “okay, I can handle the maizelands at my level, and if I wanna relax I can go back to the embrace,” and so on

Everyone who said the pacing was great in reviews clearly meant the plot bc, well, no arguments there lol but oh boy does my general gameplay pacing get so thrown off when I struggle in a cauldron 5 levels above me for an hour bc GAIA HERSELF CALLED AND TOLD ME TO DO IT!

and then I walk 10 feet outside to find an NPC begging me to help them with a fetch quest literally 15 levels beneath me 😬

MAKE IT MAKE SENSE

Anyway speaking of yikes, that lady at the biotech facility just got totally gaslit into thinking BIOMASS CONVERSION (the thing that doomed the world) WAS GOOD?? JUST GOTTA KEEP OUTDOING YOUR OWN SHIT, EH TED???

Y I K E S

anyways good on that person who resigned halfway thru, I respect them and only them in that environment

Alva is cool tho! And I mean that in the nerdiest, most awkward way possible lol

I gotta be honest, when I saw people mention her I thought she was supposed to be Beta bc no one understandably mentioned Beta and I thought Alva sounded close enough to Aloy that it meant they had picked a new name for her bc Beta feels kinda insulting to keep tbh

Anyways, her people sound neat, idk how i feel about hanging out with them since they worship elisabet herself?? that twist was really well done but goddamn the LOOK in aloy’s eyes when she realized “oh, not again!” lmaooo

I have also fought the monkeys. i hate the monkeys. i thought they were weird jungle cats for a little bit too lol 

I REALLY didn't expect to be at the coast already with how much more western space i still have blank on my map? but i guess, erosion is kind of the silent machine here? neat

as a native Californian, i would guess that’s just north of the bay, but its so far north i almost wanna say Eureka?? idk, but i will say theres quite a few places north and south that have that many redwoods, so i was kinda sad there were no datapoints ID’ing it

i wanna see if i can recognize everything now lol, i don't wanna leave its so pretty!! but i did reluctantly go back just to throw demeter back into gaia and its looking like i have a big chunk of plot left, huh? jesus, i really might not finish before the 18th oop

[nightcoremoon]

I just realized that none of the female characters in dark souls are sexualized

anastacia's a priestess in a full cloak

rhea's a priestess in a full cloak

the undead merchant is just a normal lady who really likes moss

the butchers are just big ladies who chop meat and trespassers

mildred runs around the toxic swamp in a loincloth, sure, but with a bag over her head and a giant fuckhuge axe

quelana is a flame wizard in a full cloak

quelaag is naked yeah but she's also a fucking hideous spider monster with a huge ass fire sword and it's not like she's being sexy or anything she's just like, yo get the fuck out of my city and leave my sister alone or I'll fucking kill you

her sister is naked yeah but she's also a fucking hideous spider monster surrounded by a billion curse rotted eggs

alvina is... literally a cat

beatrice is a witch in a full cloak

the darkmoon knightess is a warrior in full armor

the balder darkmoon knight is probably a girl and the armor is a crop top and booty shorts but every single other balder knight dresses exactly the same way

gwynevere has big bazongas but her manner is more maternal and/or benevolent older sistery than sexy, plus miyazaki had her designed to be flat chested and kept getting mad at all of the games artists for making her amazing chest ahead even bigger despite him saying bro stop it, PLUS that's not even the real gwynevere because that's an illusion created by gwyndolin who may I point out is her older brother

gwyndolin is a boy who was raised as a girl because of his affinity for moon magic and I'm just assuming this is a localization thing so even though he has bigger tits by ratio than gwynevere he does not belong on this list no matter how many gross transfetishist men say so

priscilla is a dragon monster just minding her own business inside her painting, in a full fur coat that might actually be her scaled but idk

sieglinde's a warrior in full armor

dusk is a princess in a full cloak

elizabeth is literally a mushroom

ciaran is a warrior in full armor

the fire keepers wear full cloaks

shanalotte wears a full cloak

shalquoir is literally a cat

melentia is just a nomadic merchant

licia is a fucking cunt priestess in a full cloak

lucatiel is a knight in full armor

rosabeth wears whatever the fuck you give her

chloanne wears a dress with cleavage wow gasp I can't believe a wimminz would dare to have mammary glands

ornifex... okay admittedly she has a thick juicy ass but she's also a weird harpy demon thing

nashandra is a normal queen in a dress terrifying scythe wielding demon monster

the milfanitos (yes that is what they are called) are just perfectly normal humans in dresses

elana is another terrifying scythe wielding demon monster

alsanna wears a full normal dress

bellclaire, felicia, melinda, roenna, the dozen other female NPC phantoms not on the wiki, as far as I can remember they're all just ladies in armor with big weapons

the maiden in black, the hunter's doll, the fire keeper, anri, lady maria, nothing I can think of is even remotely on the side of explicitly sexualized

except maybe for the desert sorceresses but I can hardly blame miyazaki for anything in ds2 now can I?

honestly the most sexual thing in any of the souls games is the pisacas since they're literally just giant blue vagina-shaped blob monsters, the chaos eaters who literally vore you, aldrich voring gwyndolin, MiB's dirty feet, all the weird gross totally not sexual things that the internet has ruined in the past 20 years.

well and the dancer of the boreal valley but I mean that hardly counts, she's like the fuckin beldam from coraline but with giant swords. just because she's got cake doesn't mean it's unwholesome.

I've been playing so many souls games that I kind of forgot just how creepy and male gazey everything in the video game industry is. just look at kerrigan's ass, miranda's ass, tracer's ass, quiet's square inch of covered skin "for plot reasons", 2B's ass, there's just ass ass ass fucking everywhere. I mean I like hot girl ass, who doesn't? but holy shit can we have some more respect for the girls themselves and love them as humans with drive, desire, ambition, agency, and assets that don't have anything to do with what body parts they have? I know my boy hidetaka has shown that it's very possible.

[softkuna]

Yuuji Itadori || Training

Content   ║ Yuuji Itadori x Reader. You and Yuuji train quite often and like to make a competition out of it. However, his quick learning and your insecurities get the best of you.

Count      ║ 1,514 words.

Consider ║ Fluff. Fighting. Probably grammatical errors. 

Creator    ║ Aight! First little drabble up. Hope you guys like it! It’s not nsfw but I was feeling fluffy and Yuuji is a literal sunshine child. Also, whenever I write for the students, I automatically have it be that Jujutsu Tech is a college rather than a high school and everyone is over the age of 18. 

“Sir, we’re surrounded!”

  “That just means we can attack in all directions!”

  A smug smirk tugged the corners of your lips, “I mean… you’re not wrong, Yuu.” The boy gave an overly enthusiastic thumbs up, pearly white on full display. Training with him was always a delight.

  You were back to back, crouched in a way that your back right foot was slipped between his wide stance. You made a few enemies from ink, letting them drench the field’s grass in black gel. Five human-sized creatures were your limit after training for what seemed like years. No one needed to know they were the shapes that haunted you at night, paralyzed with fear as they came from all corners of you bedroom. That fear is what strengthened them. You channeled it into them, strengthening the cursed energy behind the specialized ink.

  Right now, they were just npcs in a videogame to the two of you, “These ones are 3 points, right?” Yuuji looked over his shoulder at you and you nodded. Training with him was always a game. Human-sized blobs were three points. Child-sized ones were two. Rabbit-sized ones were one. Anything larger went up by every two feet of height. So far, he somehow managed to kick your ass every time. Today would be the day you showed him up. Maki had shown you a few decent moves and like hell you’d let him trample over your personal best with this up your sleeve!

  With a springboard hop forward, he drew back a fist, “I’m gonna kick you’re ass!”

  “Oh like hell-“ You bent back at the knees, left hand keeping your back from fully colliding into the ground. An ink blob came right for your neck, swiping dangerously had you not ducked, “OI, play fair!” Both palms planted into the blades of grass, balancing you as your legs vaulted upwards. The tip of your tattered sneaker connected crisply with its lower ‘jaw’. The shoe had swept through the inken mandible, triggering the creation to melt to the earth. As the handspring flowed through, you recollected yourself on both feet only to propel forward at the next targets.

  Alas, there were only two by the time you had gotten through your first. Yuuji was always fast. Faster than a goddamn car, too. Exceptional physical prowess was presented with each corded muscle before he had even eaten the first few fingers. Rumors from his high school years didn’t fail him once, not even here amongst elite Shamans. It was something you always admired and envied about him. Your own form had been delicate, feminine, and rather weak. Some rumored it to be a heavenly restriction in exchange for your expert control over your Ink Children. You refused to believe that, however. Like hell you’d allow yourself to be restricted like that.

  A pout found its way onto your lips as you ducked another straight punch from the last standing enemy. As you swung your punch, a fist made its way to you first, kissing the space between it and your nose. With barely enough time to dodge, you managed to slip to the side, arm hooking into the one that had aimed for your face. Ink exploded onto your clothes and face. Some splattered into your open mouth, triggering a coughing fit. Your shoulder ripped backward as you were practically hauled into a spin with the aggressor’s arm still linked with yours at the elbows. One of you lost stable footing. Your heart squeezed at the impact of dense earth hitting spine, followed by Yuuji landing directly onto your chest with a resounding, “WOAH!” He popped up, forearms caging you in at either side of your head, mouth sputtering apologies, “Didn’t even see you behind that thing! Are you okay?”

  Your eyes blazed against his with explosive fury. Words ripped from your throat before thought could come before it, “Yuuji, what the fuck was that?!”

  “I wanted to get the last point!” The goof-ball grin sloppily made its way to his cheeks. The world still spun around him as it always did with you. It wasn’t until you spoke again that the grin slipped down, dragging away any semblance of pride with it.

“You were already nine points ahead!” A pout made accompanied averting eyes. Chin nudged to the side to emphasize the massacre of ink littering against the ground, “You couldn’t have saved me the last one?! C’mon man.” You knew it was irrational to cut into him for something so silly. It was just training. He knew how much this meant to you, though,  how hard you had to work to even take the impact just now.

 Yuuji’s mouth opened the slightest, guilt trickling into his chest like a steady faucet. Whoops. You had always been competitive. Much more competitive than Nobara, even, and temper to match it, too. A large hand came to rustle the back of his hair, moving to scratched his temple, “Sorry. I got caught up in it. And…” Rose crept up subtly to his cheeks and ears to match his rose colored locks, “I wanted to impress you.”

 Your head snapped back into place, locking hues with his honey-browns, “Wha-“

  “You always make such strong opponents to fight against! I wasn’t even able to hit one last week!” His brows lowered slightly, lips jutting in their own embarrassed pucker, “Just wanna show you I’m strong too. How else am I supposed to protect you?” The sentence trailed out in a grumble, gaze meandering to the space next to your cheek rather than maintaining the kerosene-lit gaze of yours.

  A warmth crept up your own cheeks, lips slightly parted in surprise. Really, you shouldn’t be shocked by this. He was always considerate of your safety. The sheer concept that it displayed during something as inconsequential as training was the bolded punctuation mark to his statement. You hated to admit it but, it made your heart flutter in its boned cage.

  He wasn’t your stereotypical muscle head (despite that being your first impression of him.) He didn’t look down on you like the men in your family did for being physically weak. In fact, Yuuji looked up to you. He acknowledged your strengths and hard work. For the hours of grueling training to even be able to move the way you did, the boy made it a point to come out and watch you. Yuuji saw how you overcame challenge after challenge. It dowsed gasoline on the fire lit under his ass. Even when it seemed like he was selfishly destroying your own target, he simply was trying to meet your bar of approval. He admired your strength, your graceful movement, your technique, and most importantly he admired you.

  “Yuuji,” You began, voice softening from its resin casing, “You don’t need to protect me. I just…” Your hands moved from their crossed position to your cheeks. Eyes fluttered shut briefly before opening again, “I just want to be stronger physically is all. I don’t want to feel like you have to protect me every time we go on a mission because of these noodle arms,” To drive the point home, you wiggled your arms beside his head before lazily resting them at his shoulders, “How the hell’s that fair, huh? Can’t a girl protect herself, Mr. Knight-in-Hooded-Armor?” You playfully stretched his cheeks, tugging the goober’s mouth this way and that, “’sides, you beat my ink kids way too quickly this time! I gotta step up my game.”

  A sunshine laugh beamed from the boy above you. His hand swatted yours away, “Alright, alright! It’s almost like I like you or somethin’!” He dipped down, nuzzling your noses together. The way his lashes dipped as his lips connected with yours was transfixing. Why did boys always have the prettiest eyelashes? Why did they have the softest lips? You leaned into him, hands clasping behind his neck and locking him in place. A content hum harmonized between the two.

  It was a moment you wished to last forever. The warmth of his sprite-flavored Chapstick slid against your teeth-bitten lips. One calloused hand cradled the side of your neck, thumb stroking the pink lingering on your cheekbone. He was so delicate and careful with you, yet somehow so sure in each touch and movement that it left you breathless every time. No matter how strong you were, he had an ability to make you weak for him every. Single. Time.

Bonus:

  The thonk of a used paper towel roll whacking a cardboard box broke the sweet moment apart. Yuuji shoved his face into your neck with a puppy-like yelp before ripping up like an angered Pomeranian, “WHAT WAS THAT FOR, NOBARA?!”

  “Maybe if you weren’t sucking face on the training field-!” The two growled at one another. The only thing tearing away their standoff was your shrill cackle. In comedic synchronicity, the two shouted, “What?!”

  “D-did you hear the sound h-h-,” Words barely escaped your lips, chest heaving with each labored cry-laugh, “His head made! Yuuji! Oh my god you’re a basketball!”

[nicomrade]

Top 5 lupin npc girls

OK THIS IS a really good question first off does rebecca count as an npc girl like she did have her own movie/clipshow.... if yes shes my absolute favorite i adore her if not well let me brainstorm the top 5

i think maria from tokyo crisis has to be there right? she fits PERFECTLY in the universe by being her own kind of overpowered shes zenis new daughter and genuinely its really refreshing to see a side character stick around with ZENIGATA instead of the lupgang for once? it feels like that doesnt happen very often its usually people hanging w lupin or trying to also arrest him... anyway i love maria shes so good shes THEE lupin npc girl she has purple hair and a cool watch what more can u want!!!!! i just found out she has a last name mariya isshiki i love u doesnt she have heart shaped earrings at one point. shes so good

i also really loved ellen from isle of assassins its one of the first lupin movies i watched so i dont know how much itd hold up to my CURRENT standards but i remember her having an actually interesting arc and motives and when things happen to her (good or bad!) i did care. everyone in that movie has a spider motif but i think if i rewatched the movie id go insane about HER spider motif you know.. like shes the spiders prey turned predator for the spider this is the exact same spider motif i use for one of my ocs so im biased but. interesting! themes and motifs! yipee!

i alsoooo liked judy (from siberia with love/bank of liberty) a lot shes lots of fun and her interactions w fujiko well... im a fujikogirl (gender neutral) the bit of character lore that she pressed charges against her boss for sexual harassment???? IDK theres something about that detail IN a franchise like lupin that almost feels like the movie is apologizing for the history of sexual assault. tho she does get re-traumatized later in the movie which -__- huge fucking fail. but ye like shes allowed to be scheming shes allowed to be a little wicked to backstab once or twice while still being sympathetic with a good heart which is!! refreshing!! judy was given nuance she felt like she really had her own life and her own world

i feel like so far ive been really in w the fandom consensus maybe this next one will be a surprise... i do love anita from operation return the treasure (one of my fave lupin movies!) shes an architect i believe! and she has this convo w goemon that i like its about art shes an artist theyre both artists.... the movie doesnt focus on her as much IIRC cause its got a lot of side characters but her moments are really nice and again i felt like she had her own world, her own troubles, her own passions, she felt real to me :]

i think well. i HAVE to mention this one cause i did start making her a playlist purely in my head as the ending of her movie played out shes from blood seal eternal mermaid NOT maki im talking about the titular mermaid misa HER CHARACTER as it unravels and we come to understand ALL of it the horror of fate the power of blood it was all very ... it GETS to something to me.. id have to rewatch it to tell you more but really i think maybe this movie shouldve had more body horror. but it did deserve what it got cause there IS something horrific about misas curse and that spoke to me that was really interesting to me. maybe she doesnt count as an npc girl the one of blood seal is maki but. i liked misas character theres something to it

i think the last ones gonna have to be the honorable mention to the little girl julia from farewell, nostradamus! i LOVE HER shes so much fun shes written really fun she has a character arc that makes SENSE for a... how old is she. 8yo? i love her little american voice: "daddy! mommy!" its so charming shes just so so small and she she has a Trusted Adult in fujiko and she has a whole thing about not wanting to go back home yet cause she feels like her parents are forgetting about her but when theyre reunited she IS happy she DOES love them they DO love her!!! shes really fun the whole movie i cared her so so much she had a lot of personality while still being believably a child

[0risha]

THE FIRST MONTH

» CHAPTER SUMMARY : As an aspiring author in New York, life hasn’t been the easiest. To your surprise, things start to look brighter when you're met with an unexpected offer.

» TAGS : a few curse words, mentions of insecurity

⤻ series m.list  | series playlist | ⤻ the next month

“Take as much time as you need,” Draena drawls. Your brows furrow as you note that she was, indeed, being sarcastic. 

“A-are you gaslighting me,” you scoff over the line. You wait to hear a bubble of laughter from your editor/best friend but it never comes.

“Shut it.” You gulp as her tone turns hard. “What you turned in last night.” You shut your eyes in hopes of drowning out her next line. 

“Was complete shit.” 

“Gosh, you’re so rude.” You turn in your seat, propping up your glasses as your attention moves from your computer screen to your slumbering cat. “What happened to my happy, enthusiastic Rae rae?” you boast, clutching the phone closer to your ear. 

“Well, this so-called final draft made my mood go sour.” 

“Fuck, Rae- I’m trying here.” You coax, internally wincing when you catch the crawling desperation in your voice. Draena must’ve heard it too.

“I know you are babe but when you send me videos of you dancing with Yuka while Erykah Badu’s singing her heart out in the background—” her voice cuts off when you let out a snicker. 

“It’s not funny Y/N!” Draena proclaims but you hear the low laugh she lets out. “Okay, but when you send me videos of that it makes me think otherwise.” 

You hum in feigned contemplation. “But you know…. those are like my interim periods.”

“I’m hanging up on you.”

“Wait, no! Rae rae please- I was kidding,” you plead, frantically.

“Give me a better draft by the 12th an—"

“Rae rae!” Your cat turns to you, telepathically telling you to shut up with her green, narrowed eyes.

“And have a goodnight Y/N, I love you.” 

Beep.

You heave out a sigh. “She definitely doesn’t love me,” you confess to the air. “Yuka baby,” you sing, patting your lap; a signal for her to jump on.

“But you do…. I just know you do.” You coo, rubbing the scruff of Yuka’s white-haired neck as she curls into you.

“Yuka…. why does the world hate me so much?” You take your pair of glasses from your face and throw them on your desk. 

“And my head hurts…..” you whine. “And m’ so hungry.” 

You hear Yuka purr in agreement.

“Ugh, Yuka, back home they had such good ramen.” You sigh wistfully, turning to glare at the microwaveable ramen cup that sat in your trash.

“I miss it.” You divert your gaze from the trash to your office window to watch a trail of rain pellets zig-zag across the glass. Dark, heavy clouds farther up in the background. 

New York’s current weather didn’t help with your somber mood. 

“M’ gonna take you there one day, I promise.” You sniffle, unwanted emotions welling up in your chest. 

“You know who I want you to meet!” You raise an index finger idly in the air. “Want you to meet my brother, he loves cats. Have I told you that, Yuka?” Your mood instantly flips as you remember your older sibling. Though, it drops just the same when you get no response. It wasn’t like you were gonna get one anyway. 

With the piercing silence in your apartment, your mind starts to wander to forbidden thoughts. To straggly blonde hair, dark amber e—

“No!” Yuka jerks up when you do. “I’m not doing this tonight.” You push up from your chair, Yuka mewling in rejection. “Sorry, baby, come cuddle with me in bed.” You take one last guilty glance at your computer before walking to your bedroom. Groaning when your body hits your not so soft mattress. You pat the sheets for signs of Yuka’s body but to no avail. With a roll to the side of your bed, you see her glued to the floor. “You’re so spoiled,” you grunt, taking her in your arms and plopping her next to you. 

“Goodnight Yuka.” You get a nuzzle in response. 

When your eyes close and the rest of the world fades, you end up dreaming of him.

Well, it’s not just him. It’s more of an uncatchable blur of moments together. 

Your entry at the local girl’s volleyball workshop that you had eventually begged your mother to quit because you were terrible at it. 

The teasing words he would throw at you because of your non-ability to even set a ball. How his brother would force him to apologize after seeing the tears that stained your brown, pudgy cheeks.

Unsurprisingly, Aran was too caught up in his little world to even care but they were glee-full memories, nonetheless. 

Although, as if your subconscious was in tune with your wants, your dreams didn’t stray too far, cutting right off before that summer. 

The next morning, you’re pulled out of your sleep by Yuka’s insistent scratching against your chest.

“Damn it, Yuka, don’t scratch my nipple off,” you grunt. When you open your eyes, you’re forced to squint due to the harshness of the sun that filters through your bedroom blinds. 

With a sigh, you roll over to grab your phone, groaning when the bright light hits your sensitive eyes. You didn’t have any texts from Draena, which made you happy and sad at the same time. Usually, if Draena sent texts, they were pleas for a new draft or implied words of motivation that were sometimes laced with venom; the absence of emoticons always a telltale sign. 

However, Draena was the only person that bothered to text you, so it did brighten your day a teensy bit when she did. Aran didn’t text, at all, and if you didn’t know better you would think that he physically couldn’t, but he just took joy in speaking on the phone.

“She’s really mad at me huh, Yuka.” You throw your phone on the pile of sheets when you rise from your bed. Body craning to relieve itself when you elongate it to an upwards stretch. Yuka does the same, her white tail thumping on the wood-like tile floor. 

“Don’t have anything to do today,” you whisper, rubbing your eyes as you drag your body to your cramped bathroom. 

When you reach for your toothbrush, you glance at your reflection in the mirror. A simple glance turns into a long, attentive stare as you try to mentally pick and prod at your appearance. You blink, silently shocked that you weren’t falling into an ether of insecurities. 

While furiously brushing your teeth, careful to avoid harsh circles on your sensitive gums, you stare vacantly at your mirrored face. As if observing for long enough would finally uprise the emotions you had grown accustomed to. 

Droopy eyes, too full lips, not the prettiest nose. 

But they never came.

And as uncanny as it sounded, you didn’t like it. You didn’t like the unfamiliarity of losing such a dear friend. One, that you had carried by your side for years on end.

After placing your toothbrush back in its rightful place, you swished a small amount of evergreen mouthwash in your mouth, letting out a wince after following it down with a swish of cold water. 

You turn to leave, but not before glancing once more at your mirror.

It’d be back soon, it had to.

After feeding Yuka a reasonable amount of catnip and changing her litter box, you plop down on your couch (which was to your dismay, missing a few springs), grab your remote, and flip to a random channel. 

After a couple of minutes into a series about fire emergencies, you found it hard to concentrate, the colors that were supposed to solidify into suitable entertainment only blurred by. You squint, but the effect only works for a second. 

Things were so bad that you couldn’t even watch television?

Though, you weren’t sure what exactly these things were. Yeah, living in this place wasn’t exactly ideal but you were gonna make it big in due time. The heavy-paged outline you’d sent in last month had been placed on the top of the Greatest Upcoming list by your publishing company. 

Perhaps, that was the case; the heavy expectations that had been placed on your already frail shoulders, albeit, you knew exactly what you were signing up for when you’d hit the submit button. You couldn’t help but think that your conflicted emotions were for an entirely different reason. 

It was frustrating not knowing what was going on with yourself. The little things that were supposed to make you happy; eating snacks, listening to your mother’s voicemails, playing with Yuka, all felt like a toll. 

However, this train of thought introduced a new one. 

A rush of impelling air flits through your apartment, before it could find the means to disappear you clamber up to your office. Well, it was more a corner of your apartment that could fit a desk than an office, but it was enough. 

Grabbing your glasses from the desk drawer and placing them right on the bridge of your nose, your fingers fly. They’re set in rhythm, thoughts that fly to your fingertips and transfer. It goes on like this for nearly two hours, your eyes burn and your joints ache but something tells you that if you were to stop now, a feeling like this wouldn’t be so easy to attain again. Rare moments like these felt like euphoria. But it always came with a price; a hook of fear that settled in your skin. The fear of writing something that wasn’t up to par. 

To your utmost dismay, your writing is interrupted by the ringing of your phone, and just like that your impel disappears. With an annoyance-filled groan, you grab the source of the noise. 

Draena.

“What! Rae rae... I can’t believe you, I had the best feeling of motivation, and my fucking fingers wer—”

“Come. Now.” Your eyebrows shoot up as Draena cuts off your impending rant, her voice low and demanding.

“Huh- to NPC, why?” Going to your publishing company was a rare occurrence, you basically worked from home. 

“Urgent news.” Draena clips.

“Why the short answers? Just tell me…” your voice trails off. As much as you hated to admit, you were terrified. What if they booted up your deadline? Or worse… 

“No, they’re not kicking you off the list because of your terrible drafts.” You release a long breath in relief. 

“So what is it?” You gnawed the bottom of your lip in trepidation. 

“You’ll see.” The line cuts.

You roll your eyes. Draena hanging up on you was starting to become an annoying habit.

With a glance at your computer screen, your eyes widen in shock. 

68,000 words.

A new record.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Everyone knew about New York, the melting pot of all types of people, food, festivities, and yadda yadda. 

But no one seemed to know how dampening it was. To you at least. 

The difference between being in one of the most active places in the states and having nothing going for you was very...depressing. Though the thoughts of impending success snuck into your gloomy thoughts, it was driven away by impatience. 

When? When were you going to finally catch a break? When were you going to be shrouded by contentment and feel as though moving to the states was the right choice? 

These thoughts compiled onto your mind as you stared at the back of a stranger’s brown and very ugly loafers.

The metro was loud and bustling with life. Though, it didn’t hold much surprise. 

You made sure to keep your head downcast and avoid eye contact with anybody. You were lucky enough to get a seat on the train, but the regret finally started to set in when you felt another person pushing against the left of you. 

With an inaudible sigh, you close your eyes in hopes of getting a few moments of peace before you had to go to your publishing company. Draena did tell you that it wasn’t a serious matter but a gut feeling told you that it was. 

When your stop comes, you squeeze through a plethora of bodies to get out of the doors. 

The walk to your publishing company is short, your gray sweatpants and sweatshirt made it an easier trek. With your heart in your throat, you elongate your neck to stare at the company. It was nothing special, a five-storied building that looked slightly crappy on the inside. However, it was seemingly special to you. It’d housed dozens of authors esteemed with the title of best-seller and you’d be damned if you weren’t one. 

After giving yourself a speech of confidence, you enter the building. The first thing that hits you is the overbearing stench of coffee. The sweet smell of donuts, next. Which leaves you to salivate due to the absence of breakfast. 

“You can have mine if you want to.” A figure towers over yours. Michael. Your eyes flit to his face, then to the donut, he offers on a folded napkin. Your nose scrunches up in distaste. A cruller.

When you see the way his face slightly falls, you smile at him. “Thank you, Michael. I’ll make sure to eat this since I didn’t have any breakfast this morning.” As you grab the donut from his hand and your fingers brush ever so slightly, you catch the way his cheeks flush red. 

Now, you weren’t an egotistical fool but there was no way that Michael didn’t have a thing for you. But there was no way you were going to entertain him. Yeah, he was cute; short-cropped black hair, sharp cheekbones, and nice jade eyes to go with it, he wasn’t your type. It didn’t help that he was only eighteen, four years your junior. The gap wasn’t huge but it just… wasn’t your thing. 

“H-have a nice day.” He chokes out, a nervous smile adorning his pasty cheeks. 

“I will, thanks again.” With a small smile, you turn away to trudge up the stairwell. 

The stairs are rickety and downright scary. Every step you take causes a flash of childish vision in which you end up falling through. The quality of the rails didn’t help either. Renovations, maybe?

You’re pulled from your thoughts as you finally make your way through to the fifth floor. Surprisingly, this floor was tidier than the rest. More expensive printers, offices, and equipment in general. 

“Finally.” Draena cruises towards you, her expression is neutral, conveying no signs of what’s about to come. 

“Hi Rae rae,” you smile, handing her your cruller. “You look nice.” You observe her pencil skirt that fits just right on her curves, and her white button-up that makes her chest look really, really nice.

“Stop ogling my tits, you perv.” You roll your eyes at her crude language as she stuffs her face with the donut. “You look….” She ducks her head to study your attire. “Comfortable.” 

“Putting your rudeness aside.” You wave your arms. “Uh… what am I here for?” You scratch the back of your neck as a source of relief. 

Sensing your nervousness, Draena places her hands on your shoulders. “Everything’s fine, I promise. Just follow me.” She turns.

You blink out of your stupor to follow behind. Your eyes stay downcast. “Stop looking at my ass—”

Your eyes widen in shock as everyone turns to give you a perturbed stare. “W-what! Draena— I was not.” You scramble up to stand side by side with your friend, sending her an icy glare.

She gives you a low chuckle in response. “I know, I know. Just tryna get you to lighten up.” She pats your mass of curls. “Well, I hope ya did, cause we’re here.” She stops in front of the main conference room. 

She pulls your sweaty hands into her own. “You got this! Just don’t say too much because you don’t nee—”

“Huh- you’re not coming with me!” you whisper-yell, eyes moving sporadically in disbelief.

“Nope!” She springs, letting go of your hand and turning you towards the door. “Good luck, babes, call me when you’re done, I can’t wait to see your reaction.” And with that, Draena pushes a very terrified you into the conference room. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Uh, Miya!” Atsumu turns to the loud reporter. “Any ladies in your life?” 

“Nah and yer crazy if you think there’s gonna be.” He gives an upturning grin as the conference room bursts into a muttering mess.

Next to him, Sakusa grunts, “you’re so damn arrogant.” Atsumu gives him a shrug in return.

“So, any past ladies you’re still willing to pine over?” Atsumu blinks once, twice. The room falls into an eerie silence as his teammates turn to peer at him. 

“Nah,” he clips. “Let’s talk about the game now.” Atsumu coughs. “We should be talking about Mr. Shoyo here, no?” The orange-haired boy flushes in embarrassment as the attention of the room shifts to him. 

When the team heads back to the locker room, the air is filled with exhaustion. The adrenaline finally slithering away as they grab their belongings. 

Meian, their team captain clambers up to Atsumu’s figure and clasps him on the shoulder. “What was that about, Miya?” 

Slowly, Atsumu turns to give him a confused look. “What was what about?” He lies, slinging his bag on his other shoulder. His eyes flicker across the locker room as everyone tries, but fails miserably, to hide their interest in the conversation. 

“Whatever, I know you’re not gonna tell me,” Meian sighs, already used to the boy's nonchalant façade.

With a huff and a series of goodbyes, Atsumu slides out of the locker room and pulls the hood of his jacket on his head. He fishes his phone out of his pocket, thumbs ready to send a pleading text to his Osamu. 

When he does, he sighs wistfully. Silently hoping that his brother would give him at least a dozen of onigiris of his choice, for free. When his phone ringer goes off, he immediately slides accept. A wide smile on his face as he speaks to what he thinks is his brother.

“Sumu! If you’re calling to ask, I’d really like some with grilled salm-”

“Nah, It’s not Osamu.” Atsumu comes to a stop in the MSBY parking lot. 

“A-aran?” His dark amber eyes go wide. It’d been so long, but there was no he’d forget his best friend’s voice. 

“Yeah.” Though his voice is much deeper and gruff, a sense of nostalgia washes over Atsumu.

“What’d you call for? We haven’t talk-”

As Aran’s next words filter through Atsumu's right ear, the setter’s spine grows rigid. A plethora of thoughts enter his mind to merge into a red, blaring question mark. 

“Y/N’s coming back to Japan.”

a/n: yayy, i know this is kinda short and should probably be a prologue instead of chapter one but.... idk. also, i’m really excited to dive more into atsumu’s character. okay, okay other than that. I hope you enjoyed this! I feel as though the header is downright ugly but whatevs ┐( ˘_˘)┌

[m0nkz]

Session 1: Strahdmas Delights

We started this campaign just before Christmas last year. Curse of Strahd is a module I have tried to play so many times that this time was going to be Full Commitment - No Arguments. Death House is usually what kills the momentum. Either from the combat fighting or poor table chemistry. We all agreed to nix that in favor of a far more interesting lead-in based off characters we have all role-played long term here on tumblr/discord. 

Our Beloved Party of The Silver Order of the Rose* 

Ksenyia “Scout” Crelmer: Dusk Elf. Inquisitive Rouge. Smuggler. 

Dorinn “Mal” Crelmer: Dusk Elf. Champion Fighter. Criminal Enforcer.

Victor Trevor: Hexblood. Oath of The Ancients Paladin. 

Urlstra Despund: Drow. Twilight Cleric. 

Jane Becham: Human. Druid. 

And the Plot-Important NPCs of The Silver Order of the Rose

Carlotta DiRusso: Half-High Elf/Vistana. Mastermind Rogue. Guild co-leader with Finnegan. 

Percy Blankney: High Elf. Bard / Swashbuckler Rogue. 

Victor Frankenstein: Human. Artificer? Nercomancer? Wizard? Questionable. 

Finnegan Silverguard: High Elf. Sorcerer - Bard. Darling / Finny. Guild Co-Leader with Carlotta.

Victor Frankenstein has fucked off in the most cryptic fashion to a mysterious place called Barovia. Because - of course he did. This causes the Order to gather in the Beckam-Stein. They are all sat in the kitchen, waiting to see what is going on. 

Finnegan went missing a week before Victor’s very sudden departure. Carlotta last saw him going to call on Frankenstein about some work the mage was doing. Finnegan never returned from that visit. 

She is highly agitated at both disappearances as the guild was intended on taking a few large contracts which now must be put on hold for Frankenstein’s shenanigans. 

The box that Victor left behind contains the following: > A letter marked for Jane which reads: My dearest Jane, I don’t often use affectionate greetings, but I think this will be the last you hear from me for some time and you must know that you are the dearest person to me and my greatest discovery in all my travels across the multiverse. I would wax poetic, but I must instead tell you to venture to the unmarked grave outside of town, towards Neverwinter as soon as you read this. Time is of the essence and if you do not move quickly, I will assure you both Finnegan and I will be dead. However, if you make haste, you will save not only our lives, but the lives of hundreds of others, and ensure the happy future in which you reside. I know it sounds mad, but I am asking you to cross planes of existence and to, ultimately, time travel to a place and time I have long dreaded returning. Have I ever told you about the land where I grew up? I try not to speak of it and I know that Elizabeth says nothing of it anymore. I sometimes wonder what she remembers but I would caution you not to bring her. Clerics of Lathander do not last long from where I write to you. My sister and I were born in a land called Barovia and by the grace and goodness of Lady Ezra of the Mists, have been permitted to seek our fortunes in the outside worlds. Barovia is exactly the sort of place you would adore - full of monsters and magic and things you must see for yourself to believe. It is exceptionally dangerous - vampires, werewolves, everything you and I would consider fodder for a good date night - so come armed and do not come alone. I have included mistwalking totems in this box for each of you. They will lead you to Barovia. The ring is yours - it once belonged to my mother, who gave it to me when I turned eighteen. I have since enchanted it with blood magic. Use its contents to draw the symbol of Ezra as depicted at the bottom of this letter upon the unmarked gravestone to open a pathway to Barovia. Have your companions choose for themselves from the totems, but this one is to be yours. I want to recognize you, even before I can recognize you. I think each member of your chosen party will find something in the chest that calls to them. The lord of the land is not to be trusted. If anyone I know in the Material Plane has heard the name Count Strahd Von Zarovich, it will be you. His is the name that made me wonder what good you could ever hope to see in a monster. Destroy this letter before you ever reach him and his land. Begin in Barovia village. I urge you to trust the Kolyanaviches. They seem key to our success and are some of the only people in this place that you can trust. If you come, you will secure my greatest discovery and your greatest triumph. Of course, if you come, you will also find me and you will find Finnegan, even if we are not exactly as you remember us. Time moves differently here. If you do not come to Barovia, I guarantee we will not meet again and the loss of you will brand me mad. Something tells me you’ll be curious enough for answers to seek me out. I love you more than I know how to say. Be safe. Be wary. Arm yourself with allies, weapons, and - as always - knowledge. Yours in every realm, Victor > An old ornate ring imbued with blood magic that refills a hidden chamber with blood; belonged to Frankenstein’s Mother - Jane wears it.  > A signet ring with a Silver Dragon; possibly the crest of the Silverguard family and a prototype of the family ring - Trevor wears it. > A shield-shaped locket containing a wedding portrait of two dark-skinned elves who look like the Crelmer twins and could very well be their real parents - Dorinn has this in his pack. > A burned diary or spell book with the crest of Sahenine Moonbow on the front - Scout is carrying this with her. > A amulet with Raven feathers, possibly connected to the Raven Queen herself - Ulstra is carrying this. 

Jane did not share the full contents of the letter outright with the rest of the group. Scout nabbed the letter while Jane/Trevor tried to deal with blood leaking from the ring and shared it with the rest of the party. 

The party travels towards the grave described to them where Jane draws out some kind of inscription with the blood from the ring and the party is pulled through the Mists to Barovia. 

They encounter odd sights in the woods including a skeletal rider who rides on passed them as they do not interact with each other and a dead messenger with a foreboding letter: “Hail to thee of might and valor! I, the Burgomaster of Barovia, send  you honor - with despair. My adopted daughter, the fair Ireena Kolyana, has been this past night bitten by a vampyre. For over four hundred years, this creature has drained the life blood of my people. Now, my dear Ireena lan guishes and dies from an unholy wound caused by this vile beast. He has become too powerful to conquer. So I say to you, give us up for dead and encircle this land with the symbols of good. Let holy men call upon their power that the devil may be contained within the walls of weeping Barovia. Leave our sorrows to our graves and save the world from this evil fate of ours. There is much wealth entrapped in this community. Return for your reward after we all departed for a better life. Kolyan Indirovich, Burgomaster.”

Dorinn and Scout creep their way through the woods to spy on a man calling out a name. This turns out to be one of the folks Victor mentions in his letter, Ismark Kol­yanovich. The meeting is cut short by a pack of dire wolves which are quickly dealt with by the adventurers. 

The party followed Ismark to the village of Barovia, then to his home where they are introduced to Ireena Kolyana. The situation with Strahd’s relentless harassment of Ireena is talked over and a plan is crafted to help them AND find their lost friends. Vallaki is a larger town that may have better answers than what they have found in Barovia village. 

None of this will happen unless assistance is given in burying the late Burgomaster Kolyan Indirovich. They have dinner with the Kolyanaviches and spend the night in the manor. Dorinn helps Ireena set it out and then clean up.

Early morning, Day 2 in Barovia. 

The Party helps to bury the late Burgomaster. While rites are being performed, Jane and Ulstra try to figure out why there is a young man SCREAMING in the basement of the church, crying for blood. The priest explains his son is now a vampire thrall after a failed rebellion against Strahd. They fill an empty bottle partially with the blood from Jane’s ring which… possibly is taking blood from the missing Victor Frankenstein. They give this to the Priest and they leave… Try to leave. 

As the party descend the steps, Scout notices the mists beginning to swirl in the sky above them. Suddenly they touch down to the ground where a flourish of bats form into the Vampire - Strahd von Zarobitch. He gifts Ireena flowers (which is what Dorinn said was far better for courting a lady than being a bastard the night before) and creeps on the rest of the party. He all but chokes out Trevor who sings like a canary about looking for Finnegan Silverguard and his feelings for the man. Strahd leaves the party shaken. 

On the road, the party encounters: > A hanging ghost on a gallows; everyone but Dorinn sees a nameless person. Dorinn sees himself - which you know. Upsetting. > Something seems to be living under the bridge to Barovia village. 

Near the Tser Pool, they come across a Vistani encampment where they meet Madame Eva. She knows Dorinn’s name which makes him suspicious of her validity - asks her how many children he is meant to have. 4 half-elf babies. Apparently. Eva tells Trevor he must stop throwing himself into the arms of danger for love. 

Tarokka Reading: > “This card tells of history. Knowledge of the ancient will help you better understand your enemy.” The Torturer “There is a town where all is not well. There you will find a house of corruption and, within, a dark room full of ghosts.” > “This card tells of a powerful force for god and protection, a holy symbol of great hope.” The Beggar “A wounded elf has what you seek. He will part with the treasure to see his dark dreams fulfilled.” > “This is a card of great power and strength. It tells of a weapon of vengeance: a sword of sunlight.” The Healer “Look to the west. Find a pool blessed by the light of the white sun.” > “This card sheds light on one who will help you greatly in your battle against darkness.” Innocent “Evil’s bride is the one you seek!” -> This appears to be Ireena. > “Your enemy is a creature of darkness, whose powers are beyond mortality. This card will lead you to him!” The Executioner “I see a dark figure on a balcony, looking down upon this tortured land with a twisted smile.”

Stayed the night at the camp near Tser Pool. > Scout: Talked shop with a few folks within the camp, mostly about blades and some such. During her trance, she has a strange dream. She is in a small cabin that seems somewhat familiar and not at all. There are voices coming from another room that she cannot quite hear either. > Dorinn: Asked Ireena to dance & they shared wine together. They go to sit by the pool and end up sleeping together, snuggled close. 

On the road again in the morning, Day 3. 

Followed by a raven which is odd. Trevor, distracted by the raven, steps into an old bear trap and is released by Dorinn & Jane. GDI Trevor.

The group is jumped by a berserker duo. Both are killed - 1 by Ireena. She is shaken deeply by her own actions, but Dorinn tells her that she had to do it. She did exceedingly well.

Finally reach Vallaki & are urged by the gate watch to see the Burgomaster straight away.

There are posters going up for the Festival of the Blazing Sun, replacing something called Wolf’s Head Jamboree.  Attendance seems to be mandatory for all. 

Scout sees an odd man with a weird red scaly arm directing people to up the posters. He gives off such odd vibes, so they give him a wide berth.

This village is much livelier than Barovia but that isn’t a high bar. 

Went to the Burgomaster Manor where they were greeted by Lady Vallakovich who offered cake & eerie false positivity. The ladies with her gossiped about - a lot of things wrong in town. 

Meeting with Burgomaster Vallakovich proved rather useless. Scout wandered off to find the source of odd bangs that seemed to come from the attic. Got electrocuted for nearly ⅔ of her health by a trapped door. 

The party meets Victor Vallakovich who is trying to create a transportation circle out of Barovia. Most definitely has a crush on Professor Jane Beckam. Scout nearly fights a teenager. 

The man with the weird arm is Izek, Victor’s step-brother. 

Dorinn commits tax fraud. 

Victor tells them about someone who works for Strahd with the name of Finnegan Silverguard - though he arrived in Barovia a 100 years ago. It can’t be the same person, but they are going to investigate him anyway.

Going to get rooms at the Blue Water Inn.

[hamingo]

1, 22, and 49 from the 'detailed oc asks' for whichever oc you've been thinking about most recently! :)

Well, I've been thinking about my vtm npc's most recently, so here's some stuff about the main four!!

1. What’s their full name? Why was that chosen? Does it mean anything?

Anthonio Giuseppe De Rossi. The name Anthonio was just random, I picked one I liked from like, Babynames.com or whatever, and De Rossi came about from me merging a couple from the “Top 100 Italian Surnames” list I found. The name Giuseppe is because back in high school, our Italian friend spent like a solid month convincing us his legal name was actually Giuseppe and he was just called Jack because it's easier for us to pronounce and eventually we all believed him because he was so adamant but then someone thought to ask his mom and she was like “no? Wtf?” and we were all so mad because why would he do this??

Anyways the name Giuseppe is to honour whatever the hell compelled him to do that to us.

(Also, I discovered that apparently Italians don’t actually have middle names, they’re just considered multiple first names?? Which is wild. Like it’s the same shit just called additional first names instead of “middle names” but Italians on Quora will get super mad if you call them middle names. Also, “Rossi” as a surname came about from the nickname “Rosso” which meant “Redhead”.

The De Rossi’s are brunets.)

Rosario Giovanni was named such because he was originally named “Soren” and then one of my friends came out a few years later and chose that name. They didn’t know about my vampire oc at the time, but it was very unfortunate for me, so I had to go back to the internet and find more gender neutral Italian goth names (Rosario was enby at the time, I changed him to a trans man later on). I ended up with a list of like, four? And I went with “Rosario” because I remembered a super horny anime called “Rosario + Vampire” that I watched like four episodes of back in high school.

In-game, his name is Rosario because he named himself after his momma :3

Eleanora Giovanni was just pulled from a grab-bag of Italian girl names that sound fancy enough for an old-money vampire daughter of the mafia. There’s no real meaning behind it. Also neither of the twins have middle names because I simply didn’t care enough to research even more Italian names. Anthonio only got one because of the Giuseppe story

Greta Elizabeth Mercer has the middle name “Elizabeth” because I think all English people are legally obligated to have “Elizabeth” somewhere in their name. Her last name “Mercer” was just because I wanted an alliteration with her title “Miss Mercer”, but then my players asked me if it was because her position in the camarilla is to hire mercenaries and, yeah, that would have been cool if I’d have thought of it first.

22. What are their favourite insults to use? What do they insult people for? Or do they prefer to bitch behind someone’s back?

Anthonio knows every single way to say “pussy” in Italian (if you haven’t seen the map, please look it up, it’s so funny). His insults are particularly vulgar, and he’ll say them loud and to your face. He will insult anyone for anything. Usually it’s a scare tactic, when he’s threatening someone.

Rosario is much more civil with his insults, but also will very rarely insult someone to their face. He’s more of a “gossip like your life depends on it” sorta guy. He’s not very curse-oriented, either, and prefers to think of more creative ways to call someone a fucking idiot rather than just… saying that.

Eleanora is much like Rosario when it comes to insults regarding men or people she is supposed to show respect towards. However, if she’s arguing with a woman she feels is below her, she’ll get real misogynistic real fast, throwing out “slut”, “bitch”, “whore” etc out like it’s as natural as breathing.

Mercer’s entire waking life is a show of professionalism, so she doesn’t like to insult people. However, if someone she’s hired has failed her or otherwise pissed her off, she’ll fall back into her lower-class English roots. It’s impossible to take her seriously when she’s like this though, because as we all know, English insults are absolutely ridiculous sounding.

49. What is their most valued object? Are they sentimental? Is there something they have to take everywhere with them?

Anthonio doesn’t have any physical possessions he holds dear. Everything from his childhood is still with his mother in the house he grew up in, and he hasn’t been there since he left at 18 to go “work” for the Giovanni. He doesn’t even keep tabs on his human family, leaving it up to his only sibling who was also ghouled, Maria, to give him updates on them whenever they get to see each other. He is not sentimental. (Back home, his mom has an entire shelf dedicated to his high school soccer team. He hates it).

Rosario got all of his mother’s old jewelry when she died. He doesn’t wear it, it’s all far too delicate for his preferences, but he keeps everything tidy, clean, and untangled. He keeps one of her rings polished and waiting for when Abriana gets a physical body. Pretty much everything he got from his mother he now views as something sacred, but the jewelry is the most important.

Eleanora is the opposite. Everything she received from her mother she doesn’t much care about and gave to Rosario. However, when she was quite young, during ww2, her father gifted her a Croix de Guerre, which had been stolen from some fallen french soldier's uniform and passed around until it had eventually ended up with him. She keeps it hidden in her sock drawer.

Mercer is also not very sentimental. She didn’t keep any mementos from her human life, and even now, keeps only what she needs. However, anything that her sire has ever given her, no matter how useless, is kept.