#my fuckin loss fr

[allofuswantgwinam]

i really wanna vomit my feelings here rn but im at work 😭😭

yes it’s about a boy wtf else would it be about 💀🤣

[creative-robot]

I know The Founders Cut, generally, is the edited scrubbed over version of genloss from Showfall in-universe (as well as a not-8-hour-long-three-stream-binge-night whenever we want to watch it again) but something that struck me as odd and I haven’t seen anyone mention yet, is this warning

It shows up right at the junction where the third act starts, where it appears the Hero is breaking free of Showfall thanks to Hetch. But here’s the thing, while a LOT less than the previous acts the audience still played a significant role in this act, even when really only given two audience interaction choices. Which makes me wonder, how real is this warning, and who is it for? Obviously the audience involved knows what happens past this point, but the audience is also implied to be an integral part of the Social Experiments, which is part of why things start to tweak out when the Founder removes them in the Founder Cut as the Generation Loss generation loses.

My first thought, was that obviously this is another bait and switch, a way to draw the audiences attention, seeing something that’s secret, something that’s not “meant for them”, which is a tactic I could see Showfall using in universe to keep people’s attention and add an air of mystery to their shows.

But

Showfall is doing all their experiments and these shows with a LOT of help from their censors to show it off, displaying a fun silly show that is definitely not uber fucked up and that is 100% just slime don’t worry about it, it’s kid friendly if it’s green! And I don’t think they’d want to bet all their cards on this one experiment doing well enough to their audience to not question the sudden shift in tone that follows this warning. Which makes me wonder.

They did their test, they did their experiment, and the evidence of this last act? I think it was a one time run, they don’t want anyone seeing this, it isn’t for the audience. Act three is specifically to both test and play with their Hero, Hetch’s new lines add a level to this, never once does he call the Hero by their name, just refers to Ranboo as their Role, and he’s not exactly. Nice? About literally any of Ranboos concerns, which wouldn’t really seem conductive to making an audience trust him, especially with his monologue at the end. Ranboo has escaped before, possibly right before act 1 started, they tightened the security on his mask to be unremovably part of them, Hetch doesn’t like the Hero but they’re a fan favorite so he can’t just get rid of them.

Act three is the cumulation of Ranboo being punished for things they don’t remember, for daring to break free from Showfalls control, this is Hetch taking the Hero and essentially majorly fucking and manipulating them to take his frustration out on a fan favorite they can’t otherwise get rid of or give a smaller role like Slimecicle. which is exemplified by the fact that we now know Charlie most likely was never able to actually able to fully snap out of the control, that even in act three in panic and confusion there was at least still a part of him being influenced by Showfall.

So the first two acts are the usual show, they have their posters, they have Squiggles to introduce them, they have goofs and silliness and only a couple slip ups that’re quickly dealt with, the usual rose tinted curtains. Act three?

Do not watch the following material

[brilliant-psywurm]

Just read the auraboa lore: oh.

[captainshadowshifter]

I have no money now but I don't care yesterday was so fun

(Dropping my ugly voice fite me)

[zvdvdlvr]

being on team 141 and being one of the youngest people in the team HCs [p.02]

𝐧𝐚𝐯𝐢. ✦ 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞!!

𝑾𝑨𝑹𝑵𝑰𝑵𝑮𝑺: 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒂𝒃𝒔𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒋𝒐𝒌𝒆𝒔, 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒗𝒆 141, 𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒐𝒇 𝒔𝒎𝒐𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈,

𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑫𝑬𝑹'𝑺 𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑵𝑶𝑼𝑵𝑺: 𝒖𝒏𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒅

𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑫𝑬𝑹'𝑺 𝑪𝑨𝑳𝑳𝑺𝑰𝑮𝑵: 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒑𝒆𝒓

back at it again, its another fatherless rapscallion😭

100% believe you and soap call people bestie if you dont like them

ex: "soap come hither, i have tea on bestie chloe" and he comes barreling down the hall to hear the tea

lmfao speaking of soap

SOAP=WHINY MAN BABY

this man whines when you give him the silent treatment fo sheezy 💯

ghost thinks its really funny when soap watches you with a '☹' face evrry time you ignore him

gaz always knows everything because you know everything so you tell him its hilarious asf

anyways

you and gaz always be talkin about topher fr

(i dont have the of so an edit will do:)

HELLA INSIDE JOKES

price is highkey tired of your humor

"is there anything you need?" price "other than a father/mother? nope. thanks, tho" you *insert gaz laughing from the other room*, distressed price leaved the room, clutching at his sussy goofy wacky little hat

if you are fluent in spanish i strongly believe ghost will be scared of you

as i have been trading my spanish for german, i wont put anything else involving spanish, thanks 😍🙏

screaming judas in tge shower

ghost yelling at you to shut up

soap joining to annoy his babygorl

gaz humming along because lady gaga is goddess

price needing to leave the room

l m f a o

ok so like what if you're really good at card games, savvy?

you and 141 are laying low in a safehouse somewhere

soap finds a deck of cards, and everyone plays and/or watches

anyway you suggest playing manipulation

price immediately agrees, he hasnt played in a while but still thinks he could beat everyonr

ghost joins in, but gaz watches

what if you sat in his lap

no sorry my bad im in love

anyway

the first, like, three rounds everyones drawing like five cards

and price somehow ends up with two cards while everyones drawing cards

hes getting cocky, thinking that he'll go out first because of his amount of cards

HOWEVER

he had an ace

so that was virtually impossible to get rid of lmfao

anyhow,

price had on his poker face, and surprisingly, so did you

no one could tell you were able to get rid of the five cards in your hand only in the eighth round

bada bing bada boom you served the team their ass when you quickly arranged your cards into their appropriate piles

and then you look at everyone's flabberghasted expression

price is 😯🙁ing so hard

not only did price lose, he lost to one of the youngest people on the team

ghost is a sore loser tbh

"fuckin' hell, reaper. the hell you learn to play like that?" ghost "around" you shrug

price thinks about that all the time tbh

LETS TALK ABOUT THE TIME 141 FIRST SAW YOU SMOKING

after a somewhat rough mission, you go MIA

everyones worried; you generally let someone know whenever you go somewhere

but its hour 4 of you being gone and price is worried

you did this when the whole situation with alex went down, so price has limited experience with your MIA bouts

highkey feels bad he can't protect you emotionally :(

it was well below sun down when price found you

poor captain almost had a stroke when you saw you

you were outside sitting cross legged facing the direction which the sun had set, indicating you'd been there for a while

you had a lighter in your hand, lighting up cigarette number unknown

"what are you doing, kid?"

you had heard him coming so you didnt jump or anything you just shrugged

"do you want to talk about it?"

a mocking laugh fell from your lips, spewing out with smoke "nah."

price was at a loss. you had never acted like this before- cold and sharp

he moved to sit by you though </3

soon ghost trailed out, wondering where price was

an inky black mass caught his eye

but as he was making his way over, he saw a cigarette get smushed into the ground and a knew one being pulled from a pack

price didn't smoke cigarettes, he smoked cigars, so who would that be?

but then ghost heard your voice and an exhale and you had the cigarette

ghost: 😯

"hell's goin' on out here?" ghost grumbled, sitting on the other side of u, eyes widening at the amount of boxes at ur side

price answered when you didnt "getting some air"

ghost blinked at the cigarette hanging from your lips. okay

the guys tried to get you to talk but couldn't get anything out of you but a scoff or two

even when ghost offered to let you sleep in his room you said no :(((

after that you gathered your shit and left for the base leaving ghost and price concerned </3

whoa who broke my heart i sure am angsty today 😟💯

you didnt get any sleep that night btw

on another note

MOVIE NIGHTS WITH THE GUYS BUT GAZ INSISTS INSTEAD OF YOU

obviously he goes to you first

"hey y/n" :))) "do you wanna" :)))))) "watch a movie" :))))))))) "with us?" :))))))))))))

i'll be damned if you say no. 😐🔪

so you said yes 😍❤

he smiled so big </33

went to soap next

then pulled up the movie

with everyone ( minus ghost ), price couldn't say no 🙃

ghost pulled up, ffs 🤯

gaz chose either a horror movie or a horror movie

so you watched a horror movie 😁

gaz was probably clinging to you the whole time

so was soap probably

ghost was somewhat interested, but price fell asleep

his goofy snore is so loud bro im not even playing 🤧😭😭

if you have migraines you best believe everyone has midol/typenol for you

never ibuprofen tho bc after a mission if you had a headache, 141 might think you possibly had/have a brain bleed and wouldn't give you ibuprofen bc thats a blood thinner and could start another bleed

you and gaz have playlists for everyone

you both follow each other on EVERYTHING

if you were too poor (like me HDJSNEHDJEUZ) gaz would let you and only you on his netflix acc ❤

im sorry im a gazlvr

will probably edit later tbh

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞!!

@shadylilac

🤍

[oh-no-its-bird]

Dungeon Meshi Naruto founders AU

I want either Madara or Izuna as Falin. Thematically I think Izuna would fit best, but I kind of just wanna see chimera Madara more than Izuna. Also like, smthn smthn Madara's falcons smthn smthn bird boy,,,

Very torn between Tobirama being stand in for Marcille or for Thistle. Bc like, dungeon lord Tobirama with his chimera Madara goes so hard

Then again it's not like I have to do a 1 to 1 crossover, so. We can totally just work off of the setting and basic premise of "Oh no one of the party members got got by the dungeon and we have to go back for them" then do our own thing from there

OK SO DUNGEON MESHI AU WERE DOING THIS FR NOW LETS GO

(Note; Ive only watched the anime, so while I have seen a lot of different spoilers for the manga my knowledge plot wise p much ends w season 1)

The party;

Elf Hashirama as healer and plant magic guy

Half elf Tobirama as a heavy hitting mage

Tallman Madara on the physical front as their tank

Tallman Izuna as their secondary physical fighter who plays as a mixed support / dmg depending on the situation and what Madara needs most atm

Touka, undecided on race, similar dmg + support build to Izuna, also dabbles in rogue stuff

Hikaku, also undecided on race, party rogue / jack of all trades and armed with a crossbow

Ok so, Madara gets eaten by a red dragon right as one of the partys magic users (Hashi and Tobi) are using that return spell to go back to the surface

They wake up and Izuna is immediatley like "What the fuck happened to my brother"

Argument ensues! Hashirama and Izuna want to go back for Madara in the very rare case that he may be revivable. Tobirama and Touka thinks he's fucked and they should cut their losses here. Hikaku is somewhere between both parties but his loyalty to Madara wins out and he sides with Hashi and Izuna despite internally agreeing w Tobirama and Touka that it's probably too late.

They go back in and adventures happen!!

The whole time they're going down, Tobirama is grumbling about Madara and how this is doomed and the man is probably dead and blah blah blah. Finally Izuna snaps and yells at him ab why he's even here then, and Tobirama honestly doesn't even know why himself. He just goes dead quiet and has no real response, which satisfies Izuna

Queue internal conflict on Tobirama's part, who largley stops complaining ab their adventure from here on out as he asks himself that same question, then decides to fully commit to the party's goal.

Anyways, continuing on and !!! They find Madara !!! Only oh no he's a pile of fuckin bones!!

Tobirama, again, now fully committed to this shit, is like "I did NOT come this fucking far to turn back now" and breaks out the black magic.

P much everyone is on board with this except maybe Hashirama. Maybe we can have some fun plays with how he's like all about life and nature and ooo leafy elf man or whatever vs Tobirama's blasphemy against life itself necromancy jam

So they bring Madara back with the dragon meet and the power of Tobirama's undying spite, yay !!!

Madara is very confused at all of this, and very out of it. By the time he's started to really come back to himself dinner is over and they're all quietly laying in their bedrolls

I want a quiet confrontation between Madara and Tobirama when everyone's gone to bed. Madara needs some air and finds Tobirama by the seals used to bring him back to life. Madara says that it's not that he's ungrateful, but he is very, very confused at why Tobirama did this. Not only breaking several taboos and laws but doing it for him. Madara didn't even think Tobirama liked him, so why...?

Tobirama scoffs and says not to flatter himself, this was a choice he made for himself, not Madara

They hold very prolonged, silent eye contact surrounded by the blood and bones of the dragon. It's kind of gay.

Izuna appears to break up the staring competition with a well timed "What the fuck are you guys doing" (they'll just have to resume the staring contest later)

They go back to bed fr this time but just like in canon, Madara is woken up by the call of the dungeon master

Enter the mad mage; Mito

Instead of being the brother of the king of the golden kingdom she was instead the wife.

Oh right and the king was a little guy you may know of by the name Ashura. Which brings us a new oh no bc Hashirama is totally that guy's reincarnation and the second Mito lays eyes on him she loses it

But that's not for a little bit. Bc in this first confrontation, Hashirama gets to be conviniently absent till after Mito leaves (and Mito can only recognize him if she sees him in person bc I say so)

So Mito and Tobirama have a super cool mage battle as Izuna tries to shake a non responsive Madara back to himself. Good attempt, doesn't work tho sorry Izuna

Stuff happens, Madara and Mito fuck off, and the party is left back at square 1.

Madaraless :(

So the adventure continues!!

We get Kagami as Izutsumi to be our parties ninja cat boy (Kagami my beloved son,,) which is also extra fun if we wanna play into the parallels of Marcille trying to mom/big sister Izutsumi and Tobirama doing the same to Kagami (Kagami is soaking in the attention he is having a great time rn)

Stuff happens, chimera Madara appears, more adventures happen blah blah blah

Tobirama becomes new dungeon lord and bc I have no idea what goes on from dungeon meshi canon from there I'm just gonna leave that here.

Dungeon lord Tobirama and his pet chimera Madara he's trying to return human tho, that fucks so hard. Even once Madara is human again he still has all those cute feathers like Falin which I think suits him. When he gets all flaily and embaressaed now his feathers can fluff up with his hair too

Anyways, alternative kind of bad end where Izuna was the one who got turned into a chimera and we get definatley not brainwashed guys I promise toxic hashiizumito (Mito is living her best life with her reincarnated Not Kidnapped husband and Not Brainwashed pet chimera)

[baratiddyappreciator]

So it has occured to me that I haven't written a post about what I do and don't take on for asks, and I figured I should do so:

Fuckin' Give 'er:

SFW and NSFW HC's

Individual character HC's (usually longer posts)

Specific requests (eg: How would [character] react in [x] situation if they were [x])

Reader inserts.

I am willing to do OC inserts for specific OCs if you send me the following:

Name

Age

Personality

A bit of backstory

Requested characters that aren't normally in my list

As of now the following are included in my usual list (Pink highlights are new/planned fr the future and purple are old/soon to be removed):

Baki (SFW/NSFW)

Kozue (SFW/NSFW)

Hanayama (SFW/NSFW)

Chiharu (SFW/NSFW)

Katsumi (SFW/NSFW)

Jack (SFW/NSFW)

Kosho (SFW/NSFW)

Kureha (SFW/NSFW)

Retsu (SFW/NSFW)

Doppo (SFW/NSFW)

Natsue (SFW/NSFW)

Oliva (SFW/NSFW)

Shibukawa (SFW)

Tokugawa (SFW)

Kinks (unless specified otherwise)

Woah there bud:

I don't do crossovers (Very sorry about that one) simply because I don't consume a lot of media and can't guarantee that I will do a crossover request justice.

Spammed requests will be ignored. (I'm still recovering from the loss of my mother and the burnout/depressive episode it has caused and don't have the energy, I am very sorry.)

Here are the characters I DO NOT write for (even if you say please, sorry) :

Yujiro (SFW/NSFW)

Pickle (NSFW)

Any characters under 18 years old minimum (ask at your own peril, I will not be nice about this one, you will be put on blast even if you're anon)

I will NOT write ships I find to be problematic. Just a few examples, because some of you can't behave:

ANY of the Hanmas shipped together... Just no. Fucking ew.

Yujiro x anyone he has victimized in the past. (Diane, Emi, etc)

Large age gaps

ANY form of incest, even if they aren't related by blood.

Any reader/OC inserts that prove to be problematic will be deleted.

Here are some situations I won't write for:

Eating Disorders. We aren't doing this again.

Non-con/Dub-con

Yandere

Abuse. Self explanatory.

Here is a list of kinks I will not write for, as I don't enjoy them (I am not judging you for these, promise.)

Filth kinks (piss kink, scat, vomit, etc) Blood is okay!

Masochism/Sadism

Non-con/Dub-con fantasy play

Pet play

Any form of age regression/age play (kink or no)

Vore/weight fetish. (This is trauma-based, I will not elaborate.)

Extreme proportions (No dicks the size of trees, sorry)

If I can't read your request, I may have to discard it, I will try my best, but apologize in advance if I am unable. I will close my ask box if my drafts get too full, but I will give a heads up in advance up to two hours before I close it.

I appreciate everyone's patience with me while I take a while to get all my posts out, I'm currently fighting to get the motivation back and find time between work and my other hobbies.

[pondslime]

do you think Bo really fucking loves orange juice or was he just looking for quick sugars to counter the blood loss?? also why did he think to do that. does he think getting nailed with an arrow to the chest is the same as donating to the Red Cross?? does he know what the Red Cross is??? whose waffle is that?? how do u just leave a waffle in there?? I bet he cooked it once and it wasn't cooked enough. so he pushed it down again for another round and then it got burnt. and he looked at it and said "dadgummit not again" and left it there to be someone else's problem. and it was the last one and Vincent came upstairs and all the waffles were gone except that one. and he sighed and looked at it for a long time. and when he saw it again in the toaster while he's fixing his damn face and his dumbass sweaty brother is like "lulul god n mama n stuff" Vincent was like. I've never seen the ocean. I bet I could drive to the ocean in, what, four hours?? buy a box of waffles on the way home. this bitch is still talking. you know he talks to himself all the time. he does an Elvis impression in the mirror sometimes. it's not good. I'm gonna do it. I'm going to the ocean. motherfucker drank all the juice too. goddammit. I hate this fucking family. wish I was adopted like Lester. "there's two more." yeah I know. idiot. there were six. what have you been doing?? having sexy garage time?? christ you suck. how are we related. where's the guy with the crossbow I'd like to have a word. he needs to work on his aim. I'll put you in a headlock and let him practice. fuck you're sweaty you smell like ass. stay ten feet away from me please. yeah whatever I'll help you I guess. already been helping but it's fine, mr. never-leave-here-without-me. mr. mayor of wax town. I crush the seniors at bingo at the country club every Wednesday and you haven't even noticed I'm gone. too busy playing every single role in Our Town by yourself. moron.

JDSFHJFHSJHFSDJHFJHFJD MEG

BACKWASHING INTO THIS ORANGE JUICE!!!!

HEATHEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

when I watched this movie for the first time last year I entirely thought that man FULLY picked up a jug of lukewarm tang off the counter and just slurped it down. bc I missed the sound of him opening the fridge jsfhjhdsfjhdsf. and I was like GODDAMN THIS SET DESIGN IS OFF THE SHITS THIS IS REALLY HOW MEN BE LIVIN. HJFDSHJHFDSJ LUKEWARM TANG ON THE COUNTER

he's so stupid dumb delirious in that scene I've watched it 37874949328 times. just like. immediately deciding to YANK that shit through his arm hsdghgfsdhgfdhs. all of the blood that was channeled directly into his murder boner in the previous scenes has made him lightheaded and he is not THINKING CLEARLY hjdsjhfsjdhsd the fact that he doesn't think to snip it off. just PULLS that THANG straight through his stupid dumb idiot arm!!! the nerve damage!!! he is so sexy for that I love a dumbass man more than anything fr

VINCENT PONDERING THE LACK OF EGGO WAFFLES BC BO WAS TOO BUSY SEDUCING HIS TOOTHPASTE STAINS IN THE MIRROR TO NOT BURN THE LAST ONE JSDJDFHJFDS

sexy garage time is taking me out jhsdajhdsajhajsdhjdsh imagine all the years of vincent being responsible for the majority of the killcount bc bo goes oogabooga I want sum fuck on my silly goofy sex swing in my gas station jsdhjfdhsjfsdhj

vincent's turning wade into a wax sculpture and chopping dalton's head off and javelining a pole through paige's head and meanwhile. bo is blasting marilyn manson and having unsuccesful murderfuck preamble in his stupid basement jfdshjfhdsjhfdsj

BO JUST STINKING OF SWEAT AND VOMIT AND BLOOD and vincent tryin to maneuver himself away from him sdhjfdshjfdsh like bitch!!! I tried to check on ur fuckin injuries!! and u told me to GIT??? like I'm a dog???? and now ur sweaty diseased sickly self is leaning over me tryin 2 talk about how sexy u are and what god took away from me??? fuck outta here lmao

dsjhgfjdshjfdsh vincent playing bingo is so fuckin funny to me I'm cryin

[humanmorph]

PALISADE 28.crazy good this week etc

New radio person for the intro...! This comes at a good moment. I still miss Baldwin Home like. That very first PALISADE intro is genuinely so hard to beat... but this feels good. I'm once again thinking about Austin writing these... The style used for Black Screens intros obviously shines through (she's his protégé) but she does have her own voice already (way more rhyming? I mean, I'd have to doublecheck HIS intros, it's literally just a feeling). Just the tone used and intonation already does a lot. Austin is so good at this fr. I'm still curious how he even approaches that. Also the "watch me unloose 80 Ls on these next lines" I knewwww that's 80 Ls for real as soon as Parti said illogical. I wonder if he wrote that bit first trying to see how many Ls he could fit in there & then finetuned it to get to a good number? I guess that's just how I would do it.

(who knows if we'll ever get a description for Parti. we never did for Black. maybe if she shows up in a conflict turn somehow? so im just fuckin around for now... i haven't sold myself on the clothes. i'm just not a fashion guy. but i do like the braids)

Oh & new guy alert part 2!!! New Keith character! And he has a funny hat. Not even funny as in goofy it just makes me laugh a bit because my dad and maybe every 5th 70+ y/o man I see has a hat like that. Love the sequin poncho.

(btw I am almost certain Keith has posted a picture of that teapot on Cohost before... He posts about tea sometimes so there's at least a chance. I mean the description of the coloring he gives is actually pretty good IMO, you can work with that, but I as an artist I like to have a visual reference. EDIT: someone just asked him. thank you keith and also rosecrest)

I have the. I got Armor Astir & a lot of the playbooks other people made in a bundle a while back and I'm real torn if I should just look at the Investigator because I'm really curious. But. I also love to be surprised. So I probably won't, but it's good to know I COULD, if I wanted to. Anyways, I was pretty sure it'd be another B-Plot character too, just because it makes sense. Brnine COULD go alone on a B-Plot, I guess, but it's more fun with 2 groups to jump between, surely. Though this means the Eclectic-Brnine dynamic is crucial! I hope they can meet up soon... But yeah I just really am gonna miss Phrygian backing them up and cheering and clapping and asking questions. They were so fun together... A great team :' (

ok so I wrote everything else about Eclectic down yesterday & then noted down "vibes?" as break between paragraphs because all I had at that point was the description & I wanted to get back to this. And ooohhh my god the vibes are fucking immaculate right off the bat I'm having a hard time to not Already be obsessed with this guy he's SO funny conceptually and it KEPT getting better... Truly delighted with this new type of guy (& Keith is doing a voice!). And I fucking love the hooks. Truly so great to me. The thought of these getting loosened OR deepened is already really really good. "Leap says"..... oh it's SO funny I keep laughing to myself

And I'm VERY excited it's a delegate like genuinely so happy. I was mourning the loss of a branched onscreen (okay.I still am) but this does make it worth it. Ever since they got introduced basically I so badly wanted to know anything more about them, but especially what Austin mentioned in the episode itself: the delegates relationships to the divines they are made from & of course the divines themselves (who are alive!!! Apparently that was already written in a dossier way back when, but I rarely read those). That has me sooo excited.

Oh and the like... I only thought about this just now but the connection there to Thisbe's new project is. That's gotta be something! "The divine who's being held captive somewhere on this planet, and has been tortured for millennia" hearing a message of... That this can end & rest is possible and it's SO CLOSE? But does that just make it worse... Ohhhhh. Yeah this rules. What a great idea.

That project generally is really... god, I love Thisbe so much. I love how Janine talks about her and what she thinks and why she does what she does. Thisbe's relationship to work and being a tool and of use is so interesting to put here, with the divines wanting to rest. (And Janine saying something like... Thisbe thinks of herself in relation to divines how Mow is to her? Kind of?) And saying it seems so solitary a project... every divine should know about it. Every divine deserves the right to rest. But it's also a call to action of sorts when she talks about like... "shouldn't you want to protect this?" I think her "Fighting is not my purpose, but there is nowhere else for me until the fighting is over." hook could be in conservation here too... Also I'm just looking forward for Thisbe to Broadcast again. It was like, one of her things in PARTIZAN. I really liked her & Cori working on this together with the. Experience they just had behind them. Sylvi & Janine reading the hooks for each others characters kind of sheepishly was soooo funny "I forgot how bitchy this was!". That's good stuff to me. (as an aside: god, Thisbe has always had good as hell hooks/beliefs/whatever else. Remember "Operant Broun lies to me because they believe I am a person."? Banger. ) I also love that she thought of this/about this at the rib(?) of Barricade. Barricade as an axiom who had this close (& good, protective) relationship with another axiom...

btw now that Leap is NOT coming back I do miss him a bit. Mostly out of principle like I am So happy we have Eclectic but Leap is my guy.... shoutout to him... being a bitch bastard pirate out there in space... + shoutout to Figure A too always : ) (speaking of, on the Gathering Information Extra bit from today he talked about if he had played Leap, picking a class that also had like, a crew, and I'm mostly just really curious who that would've been. I would love for Keith to make up some funny guys for Leap to order around. I wonder if Eclectic or an Eclectic type would've been on that?)

(Also Leap investigating Motion. Ok. To ME it's at least partly bc this was so important to Millie. And he has reason to be concerned generally he fought Motion too but. That's MILLIE'S rival! And it doesn't even have to be at the front of his mind when he does this. Maybe it isn't. But it's real & it's something to remember her by through actual action. Because he's not the sentimental type.Do you get me.?)

Brnine talk show. This was sooo good. After they joked about it in PAL25 too. I recognized the hosts name, but wasn't quite sure from where until I read the dossier - of course he's that guy from the podcast. God. I have got to relisten to that sometime... I remember Ali on one of the recent Gathering Information ep (the one w/ Austin on, I think) mentioning a conversation that was like. stressful to do. and then also to listen to? (since she has to for production/editing) and I figured it would be another Gucci-type talk but ooohh my god. This was sooo. EDIT: ACTUALLY what if it wasn't even. What if it's about to be this talk with Rye edit: GALLICA i cant believe noone called me on this. mixing my elects up. rye is the one gur killed (mvp). Austin was sounding a bit ominous about it at the end of this episode! HUGE shoutouts to Ali again she is just absolutely killing it this season for real... And I honestly feel like overall Brnine was, considering the situation, doing very well. Genuinely. You're feverish and hollowblooded and have this fucking. Guy needling you & asking the stupidest questions... & like. "You made Kalmeria. They'd never let you rot in jail." of courseeee they want Brnine working for them. They're so GOOD at what they do. They messed with the parts of A Fucking Divine. . I just had a scary thought and it involved Mustard Red. But. Surely not. Nooo. I'm shaking my head. However Arbitrage? An Arbitrage deal (like they tried to make them take before) would work just perfectly for this, wouldn't it...

some other stuff:

When Austin mentioned Grand Mag in that vision Cori had I thought something like 'man. sucks to be him : (' but like. In a genuine way. "I can't stop it from hurting people a little"........... Hah oh wow I just thought of this but I am so excited for people who haven't listened to TM to meet him now. He's not even my favourite he just makes me crazy in a way almost no other character does? Like there's something so WRONG with him. And there's things wrong with a lot of FatT characters but it's like... Well. Grand Magnificent.

I love the thought of them watching Brnines interview at the next movie night (POOR BRNINE.) but I also want to know what Eclectic would pick for movie night. Oh and Partial too. Though he may not be staying I would still really love to know. Partial coming on board for the mission has me intrigued generally.

Oh and Gur talking! Even if just a little. I still feel so bad for them. "I believe in whispers in ears"... and they have reason to now. Figure is a person trying their best to do good & make changes, which is what Gur wants. I just wish they weren't a specter haunting someone elses body & what even happens when Figure rolls a 10+. Is Gur still there and Figure just stops seeing him? oohh it hurts a bit.you can't do this to him you can't (related: I extremely forgot about the other specters and ghosts and ghouls and whatnot that Figure can also see. It's not just my friend Gur Sevraq. Looking forward to hear more about that & how it affects Figure so much as to roll with disadvantage!)

Love to learn just a little more about devotion. I really need to just relisten to that again & think about it a bit harder.

At one point Austin says "Still flanked by guards, you are" and it caught me off guard & made me wheeze. He didn't even do that on purpose . I get him I do this way too often(realize I forgot to say part of a sentence and pack it at the end)

[billkaulitzwife]

can you pleeasee do more johnny nsfw hc's? i love your writing! thank youuu

Johnny Cade (NSFW)

warnings!

swearing, mentions of sh, scars, overall sexual content, p in v sex, loss of v-card

Now Playing: rap music

he probably wld thrust on every beat man

Johnny is a sucker for neck kisses

He'd probably give the best fuckin hickeys

When he's bottom, he loves when you ride him and call him puppy names

He makes sure he doesn't hurt you too much

like???

gentleman who??

He's so cute when you give him head like

He squirms

moans

whines

AUGHHH

"call the whimping johnny hotline"

"I CANT THEY KNOW ME THEY KNOW MY VOUCE THEYLL KNOW ME"

anyways

Johnny would do anything to love on you before sex

Cuddles, kisses, hugs, ANYTHING

He has a death wish sometimes

"Please, Y/N, please hurt me"

he loves when you get rough

but

he hates when he's rough

his fav position is doggy style or missionary

johnny begged you to take his virginity.

like when he found out it was normal for boys his age to be having sex

he loved on you too much

johnny seriously didnt wanna ruin the bond between yall

but

babes youre too hot

ykwim.

anyways.

HE LIKES HIS HAIR PULLED ON

HE LOVES YOU IN GENERAL

"Y/N if you feel uncomfortable at any poi-... w-woah.."

"do i look bad, johnny..?"

"you're beautiful..."

puppy eyes

he'd give you lustful puppy eyes whenever he saw your body in all its glory

he loves your sh scars.

LIKE NOT IN A BAD WAY

BUT LIKE

"darlin' youre so strong, im so proud of you"

guys im creaming rn.

he'd play lana del rey during sex

this.

hes automatically horny when youre changing your shirt

seeing your gorgeous body

(SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL, GOLDEN).

((YES I READ UR MIND)).

but the moment he lays his eyes on

Y

O

U

... hes a flustered mess

i mean hes like that anyways.

❤️🫶❤️🫶❤️🫶❤️🫶❤️🫶❤️

OKAY GOLDENS IMMA WORK ON THE OTHER TWO...

THANK YOU ANON FOR THE ASK, I LOVE YOU🫶

you and johnny fr:

[sauceystripes]

hey i cant find the fic where bakugous hero name is "incendiary"

could you please link me??

thank you!

Oh I'd be delighted, it's only one of the best baku fics out there, and one my absolute favorites. Very au obviously, and sadly unfinished, but truly a hell of a ride regardless. Baku is his weird, awesome self, still grumpy af but being famous is a whole new beast for all the former 1A-ers to navigate, and it makes for such fun! The romantic arc is straight up darling, like all the "battle couple" goodness you could want. My only "warning" is it's kiribaku (though deku is thoroughly well-loved in it) and told from a (wonderful!! truly his arc deserves its own rant) kirishima pov, so if that's a dealbreaker for anon or anyone else who might see this ask, well... your loss is kind of what I'd have to say if I'm being totally 100% sincere, because you'd miss a really fun story, but hey it's all cool, you gotta live your truth first and foremost!

Oh! And also,

He THREW you! At a PLANE!!

fr it's such a good fuckin time🤣🤣🤣

Six Page Spread. And while you're there, make sure to give the author some love!

Thank you anon for the ask, I love hyping good shit!

[wawawawawawawawawawawawawa]

i'm not sure what kind of spider it was, it was itty bitty and it was kinda walking around on my blanket and i reached out and it crawled onto my hand [i sleep on the floor because i'm worse than the joker (✿◠‿◠)]

when i was like. In the Ambulance. back in june. the paramedics asked me if i have any health conditions. and i told them something a bit like "physically not much, mentally autism spectrum and dissociative disorder" cuz i didn't want to speak much because Pain so i just skipped some words here and there. and later (when they actually agreed to drive me to a Regular Hospital after spending a Lot of time on talking) paramedic 1 asked paramedic 2 if they should [word that usually means something like "secure" but is often a fancy word for "restrain"] me and paramedic 2 said that it doesn't seem necessary

this is what Split (2016) does to ur brain..... why would you even consider restraining someone who is eerily calm according to u. also i was like less than two meters away and could hear them (◡‿◡✿)

im gonna go snork mimi now... night night ♡ or probably more like. day day. idk.

- kanra

SPLIT (2016) (DEROGATORY)

hyde is my ""evil alter"" but im actually a lot worse than him hngnf dhddn. he has a normie ass persecuter name but he stole it from someone on twitter who followed me and had fuckin, "dni if ur problematic!!!" in his fucken carrd so hyde STOLE HIS NAME. my brother in christ my twitter username is BREAKINGIZAYA. we post freak shit here sir!!

and yeaaagh thats why i dont tell my doctors abt my mento illesses except for my anorexia, bc its relevant so they STOP PUSHING WEIGHT LOSS ON ME EVERY APPOINTMENT but its not like they listen tho teehee!! except my GI doc shes a real one mwah! its always the doctors who have the least amount of control over yr health that r the nicest fr!!!! oooo i needed to call physical therapy for my back MONTHSSSSSS ago ffucky wucky fuckie

ANYWAY THE SPIDER !!!! i luv spiders they r so cute!!! heres a pic of a spider outside my apartment!!!! featuring a scandalous bit of ankle mmmmmmmmmmm

[killintrill]

It's sad bc the lack of any sort of appreciation for my kindness and genuine care for mf's rlly starts to get to me after a while I am really so overlooked and slept on when I'm the most loyal and giving person but thats their loss not mine I just don't know what I do to not matter to fuckin anyone I can literally rip my heart out to give it to someone and not a single soul acknowledges it of rn I'm not wasting any more energy on those who can't reciprocate any sort of my efforts or kindness bc it's not right I rlly will run around the earth for someone I care for and they don't even care for me even a little bit and if I continue to allow this behavior I'm gonna be self depreciative to the point of doing something stupid and fuck myself up and I'm just now caring for myself again why do people enjoy making me feel irrelevant and insufficient I do that enough on my own thanks y'all gotta go I'm fr ya cut voted off the island the tribal counsel had spoken bitch

i’ve had a good heart for all the wrong people

[despairmommy]

I am sorry that your life has been lacking as of late... It is rather unfortunate that a newcomer should arrive and cause such disruption, I agree. An acclimation period, I suppose. I hope that she settles quickly so that you can breathe again. And if she does not... Well sometimes one must assert their dominance, mustn't they? Perhaps that is cruel of me to say but she does exist in tandem with the rest of you, and there are always consequences for disturbing a balanced set of scales too much... Far be it from me to make judgements but I do miss you when you vanish on me... twice in less than a week, one might assume you're avoiding me. Perhaps you can use your time near the front to create a little mischief... The urges for destruction and mayhem run strong in you, why not indulge them a little? I recently allowed myself a little destruction, as a treat after a victory. What's wrong in riding the high of pleasure with a little fire? It was under control for the most part. As much as fire ever is.

I find Chiaki and Hajime's romance charming. Life is fleeting, after all. To give one's heart to another is as good a use of one's limited time as any. It's all a bit saccharine for my tastes, but if they can extract value from each other, why shouldn't they? I suppose you crave their despair, but that shall come in time. To begin something is to condone it to ending, and the longer the bliss, the more acute the sting of loss when it comes.

Yeaahhhh she's whatever. Ive been kiiiinda fuckin around but tbh Haji has us all in lame spaces and none of these bitches even say shit :/ We go hiiiii!! And its CRICKETS

I'll find smthn

Their whole thing makes me wanna BARF 🤮 Theyre soooo codependent!! Like can u fr do anything but cuddle and nuzzle each other? Get real 🙄 Whateverrrrr!!!

[monstersliveinthemirror]

My TTPD First Listen Reactions:

1. Fortnight: ~what about your quiet treason~ HAHAH THIS HURTS BECAUSE HE MOVED TO FLORIDA WITH HIS WIFE 😂😭 

2. The tortured poets department: I definitely feel like I would like this more if I was stoned rn. ~who's gonna know you like me!!!!!~ ~sometimes I wonder if you're gonna screw this up with me~

3. My boy only breaks his favorite toys: the delusion of "I'll tell you that he runs because he loves me" okay 😭😭 he saw forever so he smashed it up in ONCE I FIX ME HE'S GONNA MISS ME ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

4. Down bad: what an accurate break up song lmao. ~fuck you if I can't have us~

5. So long London: "and I'm pissed off you let me give all that youth for free" yeah fuck me spending my 20s in love with you 😡😡 

6. But Daddy I love him: I wish I had this song when I was 15 and rebellious also is this song about fucking swifties who lost it when she and Matty were together 

7. Fresh out of the slammer: this song broke me. "All those night she kept me going SWIRLED YOU INTO ALL MY POEMS" 😭. (But also I really am not a fan of the weird beat change toward the end??)

8. Florida!!!: fuck me up Florida fr. I think this might be my favorite??

9. Guilty as sin?: I am going to throw up. They don't know you how you've haunted me so stunningly. I choose you and me, religiously 😭😭😭😭 am I allow to cry????? 

10. Who's afraid of little old me?: this one is gonna have to grow on me, I think. Okay actually now that I'm into it, it's grown on me lmao

11. I can fix him (no really I can): this is...okay. just okay.

12. Loml: literally crying immediately. "I felt a glow like this, never before and never since" 😭 "I felt a hole like this, never before and ever since" 😭😭😭 LOSS OF MY LIFE??? This fuckin broke me.

13. I can do it with a broken heart: holy whiplash. A BOP????? Incredible. Wow. I love this. Thanks for rubbing how much better you are than me in my face Taylor lmao

14. The smallest man who ever lived: verse three makes this song tbh. 

15. The alchemy: aw I miss that happy in love everything is meant to be feeling.

16. Clara Bow: promise to be dazzling (I need a pinky promise emoji) the outro 🥺🥺🥺🥺

----

17. The Black Dog: "and I may never open up the way I did for you" 😭😭😭 holy fuck just break me why don't you. "I still can't believe it" 

18. imgonnagetyouback: Olivia Rodrigo has the chance to do the funniest thing ever here lmaoooo "say you got someone else say I got someone too" wow wow wow PICK YOUR POISON BABE I'M POISON EITHER WAY????!!!!!

19. The Albatross: I don't think I have anymore coherent thoughts right now but I dig it??

20. Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus: cause I wonder will I always wonder????????? 🥺 

21. How did it end? I really wanted to like this one but I'm not there yet lol the tempo is just weird 

22. So high school: this is so cute omg

23. I hate it here: I'm lonely but I'm good I'm bitter but I swear I'm fine.......this place made me feel worthless. It's ok I don't live in Charleston anymore. 

24. thanK you aIME: IMAGINE ANDREA SWIFT HATING YOU I really like this one it's kinda like mean 

25. I look in people's windows: "I'm afflicted by the not knowing" babe me too "does it feel alright to not know me I'm addicted to the "if only"" SCREAMING. 

26. The prophecy: fuck man fuck fuck fuck. 

27. Cassandra: oh this is for the Greek mythology girlies huh? Alright I'm in.

28. Peter: yes babe more piano pls hahah do you know how long it took me to realize this was referencing Peter Pan I'm so dumb 

29. The Bolter: "excellent fun 'til you get to know her" me too.  

30. Robin: this one is really sweet omg

31. The Manuscript: but the story isn't mine anymore 🥺

[television-pil0t]

Also the reason I was seen to be schizophrenic was mostly because when I was going though it 🤭(that’s not funny at all I lost all my friends) I was having all the schizophrenic symptoms when I was psychotic/ still am it takes a week or something idk. Still taking my meds even tho a good part of me is telling me to stop being there bad I’m gonna ignore it because that’s literally textbook psycho.

I think my last diagnosis was being schizoaffective. I have to ask my parents for the paper because I’m genuinely curious.

I’m pretty like 99% sure I’m diagnose schizoaffective because of how much it was talked about like “are you ok with this.” But also just the very very violent nature of me kinda pushed it a lot. If it’s not aspd it’s definitely bpd and schizoaffective. It would explain both the loss of emotions yet the full scale emotional range. The anger, the violent thoughts, the depression, the hallucinations and delusions I have on a very frequent basis. And the mania since bpd didn’t have manic episodes it has euphoric episodes but I do experience mania from time to time.

They also gave me some Anticonvulsants with I haven’t taken but they control violent behavior and mood swings so 🤷🏽‍♂️

They also talked to my parents about more than just therapy but full of skill training which i didn’t even know that was a thing but it’s basically like a group that teaches you how to show emotions and interact with other humans in a human way. How to react to things. How to.. be normal basically.

But yeah. So

So I don’t think I have aspd because I’ve genuinely loved people before. Exhibit A is my MOTHER as exhibit B is everyone else in my damn life. I just forget what the feeling is like and then forget I ever felt it and then spiral from them. It’s more of a me thing and how I genuinely need to think like a normal person and stop wanting to be actually.. worshiped but yeah.

I loved my mommy even tho she did bad things.

I love my friends even though I have no internet to them almost all the time.

I loved all my exs.. including Simon, khye… actually that’s it. Everyone else sucked it was only them..

Edit: so.. reading over everything I said for the past very long time of saying how much I wanna hurt Simon and kill my parents.. I should’ve been.. checked in.. a very.. very.. very long time ago. :/

“I can’t believe that faggot would treat me like this I’m gonna bash his brains in” is NOT normal💯🅱️🫵🏾 it was very clear that I was having a episode for a very long while.

Cuz at first I was like “what the fuck like this episode was so short like a few days.” Bro look around💀 look at your leg. Look at your tumblr. You talked about killing this person so much you forgot you felt the emotion love bro. It wasn’t a few days.

Thinking about it MORE I remember having a conversation with him (kinda remember) where I was like “I just don’t remember anything that happened today. I don’t fucking know lol” what was the funny part about that sentence babe🤨 we’re waiting to laugh.

“I never loved him.” Bro a few days ago you typed a poem about how much YOU DID love him? What are you on rn?? NOTHING AND THAT WAS LITERALLY THE ISSUE. What do you mean you never loved your mother. Bro be so fuckin fr that was your day 1 hold it down one and only homie till y’all die bonnie and Clyde bitch right there. You did everything for her💀 your only alive because of her. Whatchu mean?

“I never loved daemon.” Yes. Ya did.

“I never loved Simon.” Bro it was 3 years where you cut and cried over him for a few.. DAYS. Let’s be fr babe🤭 I know you where having a really bad episode for a few months but let’s come back down to reality. Be real. It was 3 years and you literally DIDNT wanna break up with him. You said take a break because your stomach PHYSICALLY was HURTING at the thought of breaking up with him💀 try that shit again bitch ass nigga and I will beat the sit outta you (talking to myself.)