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iamawolfstarsimp · 2 years ago

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Im back and I'm answering more questions because it's fun and I fucking want to okay

(If you guys like hate reading me answer questions about myself I won't do it any more okay? Just wanted to give you some information about ✨️me✨️)

If I am uncomfortable answering a question then I won't answer it sorry :) enjoy I guess

What's your name?

Real name is Cora but you can call me Soft (idc you can call me what you want I'm not fussy)

How long have you had this account?

Not long, I started in maybe early March late February?

Favorite food?

I love crab it's sooo good but I also do like a good pizza

Favorite drink?

Dr Pepper (a soda) or like a milk shake would have to be the best (I have a sweet tooth if you can't tell)

Do you have any siblings?

Yes I do I have three of them, two boys one other girl (besides me) all three of them are gremlins

Do you have any pets?

Too many.

How old are you?

I am a minor

How many languages do you know?

One. It's this one, English. I have tried to learn some other ones and am interested to learn a new language but I'm lazy

What's your all time favorite movie/TV show?

TV show it would have to be heartstopper, I don't really have a fav movie besides maybe some marvel movies

What are you enjoying to do in your free time?

(That's a weird way to frase it but okay-) I like drawing, reading, scrolling on pinterest, listening to asmr (it helps me relax) and music is on 24/7

Are you an introvert or an extrovert?

Introvert, I feel it's a bit obvious. If I was an extrovert I would be out and about in life hanging with my friends instead of writing by myself

Your favorite music genres?

Rock and pop

Your dream place to visit?

Beaches with like black sand (any beaches will work tho)

Something you wish you were better at?

Talking to people (online and irl)

How long do you take to respond to texts?

It depends, I'm either amazing at it and answer right away or I'll reply to you in like 5 business day give or take

Do you have any tattoos?

I wish but I'm pretty young so I don't wanna get anything I'll regret but yes I have so many ideas for tattoos I wanna get!

What's your sexuality?

I'm bisexual :D

Do you like reading? If yes then what's your favorite book?

OMG I LOVE READING (I'm broke because of it ;-;) My favorite books right now would have to be Red White & Royal Blue (go read it pls it's amazing)

Have you ever been in love?

I don't think so

What's your relationship status?

Single, not allowed to date yet

Have you ever been heartbroken?

..no? Not yet at least

Best memory you can think of?

I have a couple, 1 going to the beach at sunrise on my 10th birthday, 2 going window shopping at night in the city and then getting cheese fries with my mom and brother and 3 hanging out and chilling with my friends :)

Worst memory you can think of?

I don't feel comfortable sharing this information, sorry

Do you have any fears?

Lots I have anxiety but my main one is people being disappointed in me or like all the trees dying and the world ending (ik its dumb but I can't help it)

Are you a morning or a night person?

Night, I hate waking up early I'd rather be awake all night

How many pictures do you have on your phone?

Alot but it's mostly all from last year is when I started taking more pictures

Who was your favorite childhood crush?

Well technically I'm still a kid so I'll just go with Bucky Barnes cause he's my current crush 🤷‍♀️

Are you a romantic?

I hate to admit it to myself but yeah

What's your dream date?

Going to a theme park and then coming home and like eating snacks and watching movies and cuddling yk cute romantic shit or going to the beach

What are your hobbys?

Reading, music, softball, making edits, writing and drawing

Sorry that was alot if questions but it was pretty fun to do

Hope you found some entertainment in learning about me I guess lol

Have a good day thx for reading

Let your followers get to know you asks <3

What's your name?

For how long you have this account?

Favourite food?

Favourite drink?

Do you have any siblings?

Do you have pets?

How old are you?

How many languages do you know?

What's your all time favourite movie/tv show?

What are you enjoying to do in your free time?

Are you an introvert or an extrovert?

Your favourite music genres?

Your dream place to visit?

Something you wish you were better at?

How long do you take to respond to texts?

Do you have any tattoos? If not, would like to?

What's your sexuality?

Do you like reading? If yes what's your favourite book?

Have you ever been in love?

What's your relationship status?

Have you ever been heartbroken?

Best memory you could think of?

Worst memory you can think of?

Do you have any fears?

Are you a morning or a night person?

How many pictures you have on your phone?

Who was your favourite childhood crush?

Are you a romantic?

What’s your dream date?

What are your hobbies?

#q&a game #learn about me #Enjoy i guess?#Have a good day #Soft talks

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alicedoessurveys · 4 months ago

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1. Who was the last person you forgave? How long did it take you to forgive them?

i dont know

2. Is going mushroom hunting in the woods something that would interest you?

nope

3. What is your favorite junk food? How about your favorite health food? chinese or pizza. i dont really have any favourite health foods.

4. Are you listening to anything right now? Do you normally listen to music while you take surveys?

the noise that my foster siblings are making

5. What were you doing the last time you hung out with a friend? we played dnd

6. Is there anything about you that might cause others to dislike you?

im an introvert and can be quite antisocial and quiet which some people dont like

7. Is there anything you’re really particular or specific about, anything that has to be done a certain way every time? im autistic, theres a lot of things im particular about hahaha

8. Are there any chores you need to get done today? laundry, but its raining so thats not happening

9. Where was the last place you went shopping and what did you buy?

i went to currys today and bought a new laptop because mine is broken

10. What was the last big change you made to your physical appearance?

had my hair cut last week

11. Are you more likely to shut people out of your life or try to fix things no matter what? depends who it is and what needs fixing

12. Where was the last place you went out to eat? Is going out something you enjoy or would you rather cook at home? i dont remember. i dont really like eating in public

13. If you have any pets, do they seem to notice when you’re sick or sad?

i have a house rabbit. he's not the most social but he does seem to know when im upset and will sit near me and let me stroke him

15. Is anything you’ve done lately going to matter in a year? i hope so.

16. What was the subject of your last phone call? my dad phoned me to see what food i wanted

17. Are your hobbies something you’d rather do alone or with others?

my main hobbies are dance and theatre and both are things that require being with other people.

18. Is there anything about yourself that you’re trying to improve?

a lot of stuff. im working on being more confident, and

19. What are you doing today? i had work this morning, then i went to buy my laptop and now im at my parents house for dinner before i have rehearsal this evening

20. What did you dream about last night? i cant remember. lately i keep dreaming about my dead best friend so might have been that.

21. When was the last time you visited relatives? Do you see extended family often? i saw my grandparents a few weeks ago for their 50th wedding anniversary

22. What was the last relaxing thing you did? ive started meditating recently

23. Will this weekend be better than last weekend? probably about the same

24. When was the last time you were there for a friend? a few weeks ago on the anniversary of our friends death me and my other friend went to his grave and he broke down, i had to just hug him and let him cry it out

25. Do you have any jewellery you almost never take off? i have a couple of necklaces that are really sentimental but i do take them off, i dont like to shower or sleep in them

26. What are some of your favourite words? bollocks. really satisfying to say.

27. Do you have any journals from when you were younger? If so, do you ever go back and read them? YES! i have a journal that ive been writing in occasionally since i was 7 years old and it is hilarious to read back through

28. Are there any holidays you used to celebrate, but no longer do? i mean, i never really celebrated new year but me and my best friend had our little tradition we would do every year and since he died i dont even like to acknowledge what day it is

29. What was the last occasion for which you dressed up? like, dressed up fancy or dressed up costume..? cause fancy i genuinely cant remember and costume would have been acting in the panto last year

30. Is there anything you wish you could say to anyone? i wish i could tell my best friend that i love him and i miss him every day

#survey #long

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whisker-biscuit · 3 years ago

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The Birds, The Bees, and The Bottles

Fandom: Psychonauts

Rating: T for mild language and discussions of underage drinking

Summary: Two teens are caught trying to sneak into a bar. Bob finally has a conversation he’s held off for far too long.

Because herbaphony is not the only thing that runs in the Zanotto family.

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Bob’s phone rang at two in the morning. Judging by the jolly ringtone of Helmut singing Strawberry Fields Forever, it was his personal phone instead of his work one, and that was the real tip off to things being very, very wrong.

He woke up and groggily pulled out of his still-slumbering-husband’s arms to answer the little thing going off on his nightstand.

“H’lo?”

“Bob!” Truman’s voice came out far too loud for the time of night, and far too stressed. “Bob, I’m so sorry to wake you, but something happened with Lili. I need you to pick her up for me, please.”

The older man sat up, much more awake as worry and fear immediately rolled in his gut. Helmut finally began to stir beside him, sensing his partner’s agitation.

“Truman, what’s going on? Pick Lili up from where?”

“The city’s police precinct on Abbey Avenue. She – she called me, but I’m out of state and I wouldn’t get there for hours at least even if I left this instant. She’s not in danger!” He added hastily, hearing the concern before Bob could even voice it mentally. “She didn’t get hurt! She’s just…”

The way he tapered off, the way he hesitated, said more than words could.

“She just got herself into some trouble, and she needs someone to go get her.”

Helmut was sitting up now, and Bob felt the question cross their mental link.

What happened?

Truman needs me to pick Lili up from the police station.

“I’m up, I’m on my way right now,” He responded to his nephew verbally, heaving himself out of bed. His husband followed suit despite still looking extremely puzzled, bless him.

“Thank you so much, Bob. I’ll make it up to you as soon as I can, I promise.”

“Don’t worry about it.” The older man waved a dismissive hand even though Truman wasn’t there to see it. “Family is s’pposed to do that for each other anyway.”

“Did I hear that right? Our peppy petunia had a run-in with the law?” Helmut asked as soon as his partner hung up. He paused, and in a lower tone – “she didn’t kill anyone, did she?”

“I don’t think it’s that serious,” Bob said, pulling a coat on over his sleep shirt. “But something tells me we still have a few things to worry about. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“Ohohoh, no, don’t even think about hoofin’ it without me. We both know I’m the better driver.”

“Neither of us are very good drivers, Helmut.”

“Exactly! That little bit makes all the difference!”

The herbophanist sighed, charmed despite himself and the situation. “Alright, alright. Let’s not keep her waiting.”

The police precinct was nearly dead at this time of night. While it would’ve felt eerie to anyone else, Bob was grateful for the lack of people, and not just because he was still an introvert of the highest degree.

Two teenagers awaited them in the lobby, sitting on a bench together. One was hunched over and burning a hole in the ground with his downcast eyes. The other sat straight up, defiant, holding a glaring contest with the officer standing over them. When Bob entered the room first and met his great-niece’s eyes, her self-assuredness wavered for a brief moment. She hid the slip-up behind a wall of indifference.

“Lili,” he said softly. Then, just as softly but with a gruff tinge of surprise; “Razputin.”

There was no accusation in his voice, but the former scowled harder and the latter looked like he wanted to employ his invisibility. Bob studied them both a moment before his husband appeared and broke the tension with his mere presence.

“We’re here to bust you out, kiddos!” He announced with spread arms, cheerfully ignoring the looks he received from every person in the room.

“Are you Truman Zanotto?” Asked the officer who finally broke his gaze away from Lili to give them a disapproving once-over.

“No, I’m uh, I’m Bob Zanotto, and this is Helmut,” came the awkward reply. “Truman called me to pick Lili up. She’s my great-niece.”

A few seconds of silence passed as the officer made no move to do anything with that information. Bob cleared his throat.

“We’re, uh, listed in her emergency contacts for school?”

“I see. If you can just fill out some paperwork first, we can release her into your custody.”

The herbophanist watched the way Raz seemed to sink further in his seat at the mention of family contacts. The Aquatos were also out of state right now too, if he remembered correctly. Perfect timing for two minors getting up to mischief.

Well, up until they were actually caught.

“And…Razputin, too?” He asked, catching the teen’s startled gaze and giving him the mental equivalent of a thumbs-up.

The officer raised a brow. “Is he related to you, too?”

“Well, uh –”

“Yep!” Helmut interrupted, strolling right up to Raz and giving him a merry clap on the back. The teen had a physique comparable to most adult Olympic athletes, but even he nearly toppled forward from the force of such a big man. “He’s my third cousin, twice removed. Big family. Very close. Holidays are an experience, lemme tell ya!”

“Fine,” the officer pinched the bridge of his nose. “Fine, okay, I’ll make sure he gets cleared for release too. I’ll be right back.”

He stalked off, muttering something about it ‘being too damn early for this’, and the older couple turned to face Raz and Lili. Helmut steepled his fingers together to rest against his mustache.

“So! Now that Officer Spoil-Sport is gone, are we allowed to know what heinous crime has been committed in the night by my favorite pair of mischief-makers?”

The two glanced at each other. Raz was the one to break their silence.

“We, uh…got caught sneaking into a bar.”

Cold heat rushed through Bob’s core. Helmut blinked once, twice, then let out a boisterous chuckle.

“That’s it? Jesus! From the way you two were acting I thought you’d robbed the First National Bank.”

“…Helmut.” His husband murmured. The psi-king lost his mirth as he caught Bob’s eye.

“Ah…w-well, y’know, while I’m certainly glad we won’t hear about a righteous homicide in the news tomorrow, forgery ain’t exactly a humble hobby either.”

“It was just two IDs,” Lili muttered under her breath. “Not a big deal.”

The ice in her great-uncle’s heart turned frigid, but before he or Helmut could say anything to that, the officer was back. He shoved a handful of forms under Bob’s nose and the herbophanist fumbled to grab them before they all tumbled to the floor.

“Uh, uh, thank you.”

“Alright, we’re putting the pause on this conversation to make you free citizens again, but don’t think that means we’re done with it.” The Psi-King gave the teens the sternest look he could manage. “As soon as we get in the car, you two will have a lot of explaining to do.”

“O-Okay.”

“Uh-huh.”

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No one spoke a word as they got in the car and started the drive back.

Raz seemed content to continue his efforts to blend in with the background of his seat, still not meeting anyone’s eyes, and Lili stared out the window with her chin in her hand, leaning against the car’s backdoor and letting the lights of the city bathe her in neon sickness.

Helmut, bless his soul, dutifully kept the radio going while he drove, changing the station to something more mellow whenever a song started getting a little too upbeat for the collective mood of the vehicle. Bob sat in the passenger side with his arms folded awkwardly. His brain was buzzing, dreading the inevitable conversation he needed to have with his great-niece and trying to figure out how he was going to go about it.

It surprised them all when Raz spoke over the music.

“It was my idea.”

The two adults glanced at each other, then through the rearview mirror at the fidgeting teen.

“Your idea to go looking for a drink? Or to sneak into a bar to do it?” Helmut asked, turning off the radio.

“Both.”

He still wasn’t meeting their eyes. Bob sighed through his nose.

“I don’t believe you.”

Razputin’s head finally snapped up to stare at him in shock for the fast call on his bluff. “I’m telling the truth!”

“I think you’re only telling part of it, kid.”

“No! I’m telling all of it.”

“Razpu-”

“Oh, come off it, Raz,” Lili snapped a little too loud, making the whole car jump. “Quit trying to take the fall for me. It was my idea to try the stupid fake ID thing, okay? Happy now?”

“Wh – uh, who said anything about being happy about it?” Helmut asked, legitimately confused.

“Look. Neither of us had anything to do tonight, and we were bored, so Raz suggested getting a drink somewhere, but Adam and Lizzie are out of town so we couldn’t ask them.” She crossed her arms and spoke without any inflection. “So, we went out but no one would let us do anything cause we’re minors. I thought that was stupid, because we’re agents same as any of you, so I came up with the sneaking-in part. We only got caught cause one of the bartenders recognized Raz from a show.”

There were a lot of loaded things to parse through from that explanation, but Bob’s mind stalled on one particular detail.

“Adam and Lizzie give you two alcohol?”

“Not…often,” Raz admitted. “Just once or twice, when we asked.”

“Do you mean like, a literal once or twice, or a…an estimated once or twice?”

“Did Dad put you up to this?” Lili shot back. “It was just a few times, like he said. What’s with the inquisition?”

“…Lili –”

“Raz.”

“Okay!” Helmut proclaimed as he slapped his hand against the steering wheel in boisterous aggression. “Who wants some ice cream?”

Everyone stared at him, dumbfounded.

“Cause I’m really feeling some chocolate-vanilla swirl right now. Basic bitch style. Right? Who’s with me?”

Silence.

“Great! Look at that, open Dairy King right there, better take advantage of this opportunity before it slips through our fingers like the melting ice cream we’re all gonna have in about five minutes!”

The psi-king swung into the parking lot in a frenzy and herded the car crew inside before any of them could come out of their shock long enough to protest. It was only as Bob was staring up at fifteen flavors of oversaturated sugary goodness that he realized what had just happened.

He couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief over his husband’s diversion. The tension that had been boiling over was cooled significantly by the sudden non-sequitur, and while the teens were rather half-hearted about picking out their sweet treats, there was no longer a risk of an explosion happening.

Metaphorically and literally.

Helmut caught his spouse’s eye with a meaningful look at Lili the moment all of them had their orders in hand, then slung his arm around Razputin’s shoulders and steered him away. “C’mon my lad! Nothing like the cool night air of three in the morning to keep your Hurricane ™ properly chilled!”

The poor boy had no choice but to let himself be pulled outside, leaving the two Zanottos standing awkwardly in the dingy restaurant. Bob gave a nervous scratch at his chin under his beard.

“How about we, uh, find a seat somewhere?”

Lili couldn’t fully cross her arms while holding ice cream, but she did a good job of making it work anyway. “Sure.”

They sat in a booth in the farthest corner from the front counter. Both great-niece and great-uncle stared at their respective sweet treats as if they could teleport them out of this situation. Bob glanced out the window and saw Helmut and Raz standing outside of the car. The former was on one knee with his hand on the teen’s shoulder, speaking earnestly but inaudibly, and the latter was scuffing the toe of his sneaker against the asphalt.

“Are you going to lecture me?” Lili finally cut through the silence.

Bob turned back to her. “No. Not really.”

“No?” She broke her gaze away from her ice cream just a little bit, eyeing him with surprise. “Then why did Helmut take Raz and leave us alone?”

She was so perceptive, so smart. And yet, still so young.

“Well, I… I still want to talk to you about what happened. I’m just not very, good, at this kind of thing.” He took his spoon and absentmindedly began drawing a flower in his soft-serve. “You already know what you did wasn’t a good idea, right? So I don’t think a lecture would help things any on that front.”

She didn’t respond. He continued.

“It’s less about the fake ID and more…the reasons you made the fake ID. Does that make sense?”

“I guess so, but I know what I’m doing, Uncle Bob. I’m not going to drink irresponsibly.”

The herbophanist shook his head. “But you’ll do irresponsible things to be able to drink in the first place.”

“That’s not –” Lili didn’t have a good rebuttal. She folded her arms and grumpily started eating her cherry chocolate delight. “Whatever. It’s two different things, anyway.”

Against his better judgement, Bob began picking at his own food as he thought about how best to bring the subject back up without making the teen defensive again. Spoons clicking against teeth was the only sound between them for a solid minute.

Finally, an epiphany.

“Did Truman ever…tell you anything, about your great-grandma?”

The girl paused with a bite halfway up to her mouth. She frowned, confused. “Grandma Tia? Not much. Just that she died when he was a baby.”

“Yeah. Yeah, she did.” He ran a tired hand over his face. The ache in his heart might have long-since healed into a scar, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt when pressed. “She passed away when I was nineteen. The doctors told me it was liver failure.”

He didn’t have to say anything else. Lili’s mouth thinned and she put her spoon down, uncomfortable.

“When I…found out the reason behind her death, I was horrified by it. It didn’t make sense to me why she would willingly do something that hurt her so badly, especially when I was right there to love her and help her. It felt like a betrayal that she never got help or made herself stop. I was…disgusted by the mere thought of doing anything like that.”

Bob took a moment to breathe and wipe his eyes. He wasn’t crying, but better safe than sorry.

“It sounds pretty hypocritical when I say it now, doesn’t it?”

His great-niece only gave him a hesitant look.

“Anyway, uh, where was I…” He worried his lip. “Oh, right. I told myself that I’d never touch the stuff after that. I was angry at what she’d done, and I was determined not to have the same ‘weakness’, so to speak. As you know, it, uh, it didn’t last long. I was at a college party barely a year later when I was invited by some friends to drink with them. I didn’t make human friends very easily back then – actually, I still don’t – so I was a little desperate to keep them. It turned out to be pretty hard whiskey, so I got hammered.”

The man leaned back in his seat, staring at the patterns in the booth table.

“Back then, no one really knew how alcoholism could run in a family. Everyone thought it was a personal choice to keep drinking. It wasn’t even classified as an addiction yet. So I didn’t know how susceptible I was, or how careful I had to be. I’d spend months not having a single drink, thinking I was fine and could handle myself, and then I’d get plastered for a week at parties and bars and God knows what else, and it would take me even longer to get myself to stop again. It was like that even when I was with Ford and his gang. It wasn’t until I started dating Helmut that I started trying to change those habits. I’d never met anyone who loved me so unconditionally that I wanted to be a better person for them, until him. And it worked for a while.

“Well, barring our wedding, of course. I got shitfaced at the reception. It was embarrassing afterwards, but Helmut told me it made our cake-eating ceremony a hell of a great time.”

Lili snorted, and it was accompanied by a tiny upturn of her lips. Then it dropped as her expression became solemn. “And then…everything with Maligula happened, right?”

“Yeah. I think you know the rest of that story.”

“Uh-huh.”

Great-niece and great-uncle sat together for a while, just thinking about it all.

“I know I have to be more careful drinking than a lot of people, Uncle Bob,” Lili finally said at length. “My dad warned me about it when I was old enough to ask.”

“Truman is a good dad,” he murmured in response.

“The best dad.”

“Definitely the best dad.”

More silence.

“I didn’t mean to worry you and him,” she continued. “Or scare you. I know it was dumb to do what we did tonight.”

Bob looked at her, and she gave a conceding sigh.

“Okay, it was dumb to do a lot of what we’ve been doing with this stuff. That doesn’t mean I’m not being careful.”

“Kid, it’s not always just a matter of being careful. I thought I was being careful. I thought that for years and years, and when I finally realized I wasn’t, I convinced myself I could stop any time I wanted to, and kept up the same patterns anyway. That’s what I’m trying to get you to understand. I just don’t want you to make the same mistakes I did. I’m just worried about you.”

Lili closed her eyes with a grimace. “I know. I’m sorry, Uncle Bob.”

“Hey, kiddo, look at me.” He waited until she did so. “I’m not mad at you. I’m not disappointed, either. That’s your dad’s job. I get it, is what I’m saying. It gives you a buzz, and it’s fun and exciting, and you just wanted to have a good time with your, uh…”

Bob leaned in a bit, and dropped his voice to a stage whisper.

“Is Raz still your boyfriend?”

“Wha –” her cheeks went red. “Yes, he is!”

“Alright, sorry, I’m just always out of the loop. No one ever tells me when these things change or not. Anyway,” he continued before she could get brighter than the cherries in her ice cream. “I’m just saying that you gotta be more than careful with this kind of thing. Everyone should be, really, but especially people like us. Plants aren’t the only thing that runs in the Zanotto family, unfortunately, so we just have to be aware of it and act accordingly.”

The teen turned this over in her mind. He could practically see the gears moving. When she looked at him again, it was with a slow, contemplative nod.

“No more late-night bar-hopping?” Her great-uncle asked.

“No more late-night bar-hopping.” She answered, sincere.

“Good.” He looked outside. Helmut and Raz were both lying on the front of the car, pointing out stars to each other. The sight made him smile. “Come on, we’ll work on that whole thing about Adam and Lizzie giving you alcohol another time, when it’s not three in the morning. For now, let’s rejoin our boys again and go get some rest, okay?”

“Okay.” Lili slid out of the booth and tentatively took her family member’s hand. His fingers squeezed hers in reassurance. “And...thanks, Uncle Bob.”

“Well, what can I say. Us weird Zanotto plant people hafta look out for each other, right?”

“Right.”

They walked out together, hand-in-hand.

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A/N: I knew from promotional material that we'd be going into the mind of someone struggling with alcoholism, but Bob's Bottles punched me hard in the gut. It's probably my favorite mind in the game, both because it's visually gorgeous and because it hit a little close to home with some of the themes, like generational alcoholism and how the addiction can make someone a shell of themselves.

I wrote half of this three weeks ago and then found myself really struggling to finish it because it brought up a lot of old feelings I thought I'd sorted through a long time ago.

Psychonauts, man.

#psychonauts 2 #psychonauts 2 spoilers #Bob Zanottto #Helmut Fullbear #Lili Zanotto #Razputin Aquato #Bob Zanotto/Helmut Fullbear #psychonauts

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nocteville · 10 months ago

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I vibe most with the Lonely and the Vast

For the Lonely;

- I’m already very similar to Martin, so there’s that (which I’ve discussed in a previous post, but tldr; I have a similar personality to him and similar ways of relating to the entities, his s5 statements (170 and 186) are also my overall favourite statements from the whole series)

- My favorite weather is when it’s slightly cold and so foggy you can’t see down the street and it’s just really nice and quiet. It was like that about a month ago where I live and I walked to a local beach (shown below, it’s the rocky one) and it was just the nicest thing. I highly recommend walking around on a foggy day with a nice cup of tea.

- I am introverted to the point that I didn’t see most of my friends for nearly a year after we graduated (most of them still live in the same city as me). Also, on a related note, for my first semester of college, I hardly talked to anyone except for my professors, a few classmates, and one or two of my friends. It wasn’t intentional, but I didn’t mind it either.

- If you ignore the villain/mean aspects, my dad is kind of similar to Peter Lukas (extremely introverted but chatty and charismatic at times, he seems to really like silent auctions(?), his favourite places are Banff (specifically when it’s a bit rainy or foggy) and our condo (which is fittingly called Solitude) at a ski hill, he’s also mentioned several times how growing up he never felt like he really related to others around him and never cared much for trends, sports, or most pop culture topics).

- This one is more personal but growing up I frequently had issues in friendships and was often excluded, a third wheel, in toxic friendships, ignored, or outright bullied a couple times, so I often felt kind of alone in that aspect. Eventually I started preferring just being on my own I guess?

For the Vast;

- I really like astral and weather themed things. Right now as I’m writing this, I’m wearing a blue sweater with white clouds on it (it’s one of my favourite sweaters), and I have a necklace on that has a small moldavite pendant (which is a stone formed by meteor impacts). I also have a star tattoo, and just so many star, cloud, and ocean inspired decorations in my room

- In terms of beliefs, I consider myself to be most similar to being a pantheist, which I think is quite vast-coded (pantheism is essentially the belief that if there is a god or higher power that it is present in everything and everyone and that the universe and everything in it is in itself god)

- I genuinely enjoy light turbulence on planes. I think it’s fun

- I love storms and the smell of rain (petrichor is my favourite smell other than lavender and basically any tea)

- Going based on dnd lore of storm sorcerers and how they are sometimes attuned to their powers by being born during a storm or significant weather event, if I were a dnd character I’d likely have similar abilities (but more focused on ice) because the day I was born was two days before the coldest day of the year in the city I was born in (and the day I was born had a low temperature of nearly -30 C). It was also a new moon, so that’s cool

- I also have a pet bird and have always loved anything to do with winged creatures and flying (I was that one kid who would pretend to be a fairy, and I always particularly liked the idea of rain, storm, or water magic. My love of fairies is also how I broke my arm when I was 3)

reblog this w the entity/entities you most align yourself with & why

#long post #the magnus archives #my silly little posts #the vast #the lonely #vast #lonely #tma entities #tma #reblog #you guys finally get a pic of me #okay but being on a foggy beach with white hair gave such s4 Martin vibes #rambling

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neodracunyan · 3 years ago

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You are My Human Lover and Mine Only|Yandere!Girlfriend x Male!Reader

Requested by cassandra from Quotev

Reader Info

Y/n - Your Name

L/n - Last Name

N/n - Nickname

E/c - Eye Color

H/c - Hair Color

F/c - Favorite Color

A/n - Y/n L/n is just your average normal human boy with no friends to talk to or laugh with until he meets with the most popular girl in school known as Girlfriend and the two of them became a loving couple until Y/n starts talking with some of his new friends, especially girls that actually broke Girlfriend's own heart and is determined to get her true love back, even if it means by devouring the souls of everyone in the entire planet and enslave the human race to seal their relationship permanently.

A/n #2: This oneshot is based off of the Friday Night Funkin' Animation on Youtube made by FERA Animations called, "Boyfriend Turns Into A Vampire", but in more of a Yandere Twist at the end of the oneshot that is completely different from the original.

Location: Creation City High School - Creation City

Date: August 13, 1987

Time: 8:00 AM

No POV

Once upon a beautiful morning in Creation City, for today is like every other day, it's the first day of school and our story begins with a young teenage boy with the H/c hair and a pair of colorful E/c eyes named Y/n L/n, who just moved into Creation City a couple of weeks ago and is riding the school bus for his first day of school at the Creation City High School.

However, despite of being new here in Creation City as the new student here at Creation City High, things are not going well for the poor teenage boy for he is just your average normal human boy with no friends to talk to or to laugh with because Y/n is not always the social type and is much more of a introvert. Every time, he tries to interact with someone to be friends with, but they just ignore him like he doesn't even exist making the boy even more sad and depressed as the day progresses.

All he ever wanted is to hang out and make lot of friends just for once to make him feel like that he is not a figment of someone's imagination.

Y/n *Thinking*: Why would anyone do this to me? I did nothing bad to them to get under their skin. All I ever wanted to have lots of friends to hang out with instead of making everyone think I don't even exist. How is this even my life if they think I don't even exist whenever I tried to strike up a conversation with someone? What is a man to do at a time like this?

As he questions himself when a miracle might happen to him at any time, but he feels that his first day here at Creation City High is not what it's crack up to be.

Until today, when his life is about to change for the better when a red-haired girl named Girlfriend, who was known as the most popular girl in school walk right through the door of the classroom that Y/n is in and as he gazed upon the beautiful brunette in pure awe and the girl looked at him with a wink for it was love at first sight.

Girlfriend then took a seat right next to Y/n as the boy began to blush up a storm that he is sitting right next to the most popular girl in school, which she actually find the boy very cute when he blushes like that and she can tell by the look on his face.

Girlfriend: Hi there~ You must be new here at this school. What's your name, cutie~?

Y/n: Uhhh....It's....Y/n.

Girlfriend: Y/n? That a cute name for a new student~. Wanna hang out with me after school?

Y/n: Wha? You wanna hang out with me? We just met and we haven't even gone on our first date...

Girlfriend: *Giggles* You're quite the joker, aren't you?

Y/n: Not really? I don't have much friends back at my home town before I moved here in Creation City with my family. I'm much more of a introvert.

Girlfriend: Oh my. I'm so sorry to hear that. I'll be your friend, Y/n.

Y/n: Really? You want to be my friend? You do that for me?

Girlfriend: Of course. That's what friends are for? I know a place that has the best milkshakes in town. I can even show you a few friends of mine after that. A cute boy like you should be treated as equal like everyone else.

Y/n: Gee thanks, Girlfriend.

Girlfriend: *Giggles* No Problem, Sweetheart~.

After a whole day of spending some time with his new friend, Girlfriend, the two of them eventually became a couple after a few dates with each other as their friendship blossomed into a loving relationship that quickly evolved over time they've been together as a happy lovely couple. The relationship between Y/n and Girlfriend has made Y/n just as popular as Girlfriend, giving him the respect that he truly deserved.

However, things are about to go down under when one bad day between the lovely couple can turn their world upside-down for not everything in our lives is eternal because we are victims of our own impulses, which will lead to dire consequences of our actions.

Y/n's own curiosity to search for new friends has put a wedge between their relationship, which have shattered Girlfriend's heart into a million pieces. She had feared that when Y/n makes new friends wherever he goes, he will eventually break up with her and be with a another woman and will forget about her like she never existed in his life that she have given on the first time that they met each other.

It will be a cruel ending for both of them, but Girlfriend is determined to get his love back from anyone that will take away his love for her and nothing will stop her from getting what she truly desires most, a worthy mate to bear her children as future husband and wife.

As Y/n is talking to a blue-haired girl by the name of Sky, their conversation was interrupted by a very furious girlfriend as she faced them head on, revealing her true form, but Y/n was horrified after noticing the strange changes of her appearance.

Her sharp fangs and her haunting gaze for she is now a demon.

Girlfriend: HOW DARE YOU TRY TO STEAL MY TRUE LOVE!!! YOU WILL ALL PAY FOR YOUR MISDEEDS!!! YOU HUMANS WILL SUFFER DIRE CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR ACTIONS FOR TREATING MY BELOVED WITH SUCH DISRESPECT!!!

Then without thinking, Girlfriend then slammed Sky's down to the pavement with a sickening crack, but the blue-haired girl will not be defeated that easily as she also changed into her demonic form to put an end to her reign of terror once and for all, making the boy completely terrified to realize that his own life has now becoming a living nightmare as the two demonic entity began their fight for his heart.

Sky is just as powerful as Girlfriend in her demonic form, but Girlfriend is much more stronger than her, thanks to the power of love between her and her true love. It was a tough battle, but Girlfriend has given the final blow to the head of the blue-haired demon, killing her instantly as her neck snaps on the pavement for the battle was over.

But, she is determined to win the war for her lover's heart as she will make sure that he will never leave her side ever again.

Y/n could not believe that his own girlfriend is a demon from Hell and has an unhealthy obsession towards him and she just killed that poor, innocent girl, who was also a demon like her that he didn't know. Then his body went pale after Girlfriend appeared behind him with a intense glare in her glowing red eyes as she bares her sharp, pointy fangs to mark Y/n as her mate for all eternity.

Y/n slowly turned around to see Girlfriend looking at him with a scary look on her face and seeing her sharp fangs is enough for him to run away as fast he can. But, he was stopped in his tracks as Girlfriend lunged at him and bit him on the neck, drinking the blood from his veins.

He can already feel the demon blood coursing through his entire body, knocking him out cold as he can already feel the changes that is turning him into a demon like Girlfriend for she has made her mark on her lover, sealing their love together to the point of no return that their love can not be broken by anyone that will separate their loving relationship ever again.

As Y/n laid on the ground unconscious with his demonic transformation complete, Girlfriend looked down on her lover with a very happy and sadistic smile on her face as she gently picked him up from the ground bride style, knowing that he will never leave her life ever again and she will make sure that will never happen again by planning to enslave humanity as punishment for all the heartbreaking moments of her past love interests that only loved her for her looks or to use her for fame and money.

As she heads back home to her family mansion with her future husband, she said to him in a calm and quiet tone in her voice,

Girlfriend: I'm sorry that I has to do this to you, N/n, but I can't let you simply walk away from me like that. I had to take matters into my own hands and now my demon blood has made you what you are now and will always must be as my mate to bear my children. Once I take you back home at my parent's mansion, I will make sure that you never leave my side again because You are My Human Lover and Mine Alone. I love you very much, Y/n L/n and don't you forget it because we are going to be together until the end of time.

AND THEY BOTH LIVED HAPPILY NEVER AFTER

THE END

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twilight-love-nochu · 4 years ago

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BTS Reaction To neglecting their family while away (Hyung Line)

JIN (Kim Seokjin)

When you started to date Jin you knew what you got yourself into. Jin is a busy man always preparing for the next comeback or going on tour. He was living his dream and you knew how much it meant to him so you didn’t complain. You felt quite proud of him actually since even with his busy schedule he usually never forgets to take care of his family and spends as much time with your three year old and you as possible.

Though on his current tour it was quite different. For a long time he didn’t call you two and barely ever answered your calls and you were getting quite tired of it. Yes, he was busy but you were just asking for 5 minutes, enough time to check on each other and for him to talk to his son.

It had already been 4 months since he left and your son was missing him terribly. He was starting to be uncontrollable, always throwing tantrums and never wanting to go to sleep demanding for his father to sing him to sleep.

Today was one of those nights again. Your usually smiley son was currently crying at the top of his lungs and kicking when you tried to come near him. At this point you were fed up with it and didn’t have any energy to deal with it anymore.

You left your son’s room and went to the living room were you left your phone. You snatched it from the table it was laying on and FaceTimed your husband over and over again determined to have him answer the phone, which he did after the fifth call.

“What is it?! You can’t just blow up my phone like this I’m about to go to the rehearsals and I’m already late, Y/N.” You could tell that he was pissed by the way he growled at you. But at this point you were probably more irritated than him so it didn’t faze you.

“I wouldn’t have to if you actually answered when I called… or maybe even called yourself.” You retorted with a fake smile.

“You know I’m busy, I don’t always have time. Like right now actually.”

“Seems like lately even when you do have time you prefer spending it with anything or anyone other than your family.” You didn’t even know were that came from and the words surprised even you but you weren’t going to show him how startled you were. “Whatever I just called because your son misses you very much and is making life very hard for me right now so talk to him.” You said while going back into your son’s room and handing the phone to your son who was still crying, though much calmer now.

As soon as he say his father on the screen you could see his eyes light up.

“Hi buddy!” you heard Jin say as you took the opportunity to go to the kitchen and heat up your food as you didn’t have any time to eat before since you were too busy taking care of the troublesome son. You also took the time to calm down from the fight with your husband.

After a few minutes you went back into your son’s room to check on him only to find him fast asleep with your phone on his lap. You smiled at how cute he looked before walking over to him. You payed him down in his bed, tucked him in and pressed a kiss to his temple before taking the phone and walking out of the room making sure to close the door carefully behind you.

“Y/N?” The voice coming from your phone startled you a bit, you didn’t realize that he was still on the call. When you pointed the camera at your face Jin started talking again: “He grew a lot since the last time I saw him. I didn’t realize how long it has been.” He said with a sad smile on his face problably trying to start small talk with you.

You chuckled bitterly at his words “Yeah, talk to you whenever.” You rolled your eyes.

“Wai-“ you didn’t let him finish before ending the call. You really didn’t feel like talking to him after your fight.

SUGA (Min Yoongi)

Yoongi has always been a distant person. He often missed calls or forgot to text back, or even canceled some dates. In the beginning of your relationship it made you doubt his feelings for you quite often but you soon came to realize that he wasn’t being distant on purpose. He is just naturally introverted and very serious and concentrated when it comes to his work.

What helped you realize that we’re many actions of his, like when he came to you when he needed inspiration, or when he sometimes came over to your apartment that was further away from his studio than the dorms fully knowing that you would be asleep when he came and that he had to leave even before you woke up and when you realized that and asked him about it he simply replied that he only felt completely relaxed when he was with you, or simply that he trusted you with his beloved dog Hollie when he was on tour.

Tour was the only time where you two were completely apart from each other and the only way for you to communicate was through the phone. This made tours the hardest times in your relationship, as your communication would be at its minimum. Of course you missed your boyfriend very much when he was away but you trusted Yoongi and knew that if he didn’t call he was just immersed in his work and stressed, you didn’t want to be a distraction from his work since you know how important it was to him.

Anyway you soon got used to his lifestyle and you two started to make changes in both of your lives so that you were both happy. You started hanging out at his studio more often - obviously not distracting him but doing your own thing -, soon you two even moved in together and later on he married you.

Now here you are 5 years later and not much has changed. Yoongi is still as focused on his career and you don‘t mind much, you miss him, but you were used to it by now… but your daughter was not.

Your daughter was only 4 years old so she didn’t understand why her daddy had to be away from her for so long. She is the biggest Daddy‘s Girl out there so she also didn’t like the idea of him going around the world to make other girls happy very much.

The 4-year-old has been feeling a little bit under the weather for a couple of days now and it broke your heart to see your usual bundle of happiness in that state. You thought long about how to make her feel better and came to the conclusion that talking to her beloved dad was the only medicine that would help.

You pondered for a very long time wether you should call him or not since you knew how grumpy he could get when he got interrupted while working but when your daughter even refused to eat you knew you had to.

You went into your room to start the call because you didn’t know how Yoongi would react after picking up the phone and you didn’t want him to snap at you in front of your 4-year-old.

Sure enough Yoongi seemed pissed after answering your second call. “Babe, I’m working, you know I don’t like getting interrupted.” Yes he was scolding you but you couldn’t help the butterflies that erupted in your belly upon hearing his voice after so long.

“Oh come on, you’re always working Yoongi and we haven’t talked in so long.” You pouted a little.

“I’m busy Y/N, I’m working on a new song right now and I really don’t want to forget what I had in mind.” He doesn’t budge, making you sigh.

“Yoongi, we talked about this. When you’re working you tend to get too immersed in it and you forget to call. The last time we talked was more than a month ago and the only reason I even know you’re alive and well is because I talk to your members. I just want one call once in a while even if it’s for a few minutes. Y/D/N misses you a lot… and I do too.” You add shyly.

That’s when you see a soft smile for on your Husband’s lips. “ You’re Right Y/N. I’m sorry. I guess I do get too immersed in my work. I didn’t even realize how I miss you two too.”

“You really need to take a break once in a while babe.” You tell him.

”I know. I will. How’s Y/D/N?” You can see his eyes light up just at the thought of her, making you chuckle.

“Not so good, she hasn’t been nearly as cheerful as she usually is. And I just tried to feed her but she keeps rejecting any kind of food. I think she just misses you a lot. You know I’m used to not talking to you that much but she isn’t.” You tell him honestly and his face falls remarkably.

“You should be used to me neglecting you either, Y/N.” He says sadness laced in his voice. “I’ll make it up to you I promise. For now let me talk to my Princess.”

You walk into the living room with your phone in your hand to find said princess lying on the sofa while watching her favorite show on the TV.

“Baby, Look who’s on the phone!” You say with a cheerful tone.

As sulky as she was before she still looked over to you and as soon as she saw her father on the phone the Y/D/N that you knew and loved cake back.

“Appa!!!”

You stayed on the phone for almost 2 hours during which your daughter happily told him about everything he had missed since his last phone call and he even got her to eat before she passed out on your lap. You were relieved that she was back to her old bubbly self.

Surprisingly, the call didn’t end after you put Y/D/N to bed like you would have thought. Instead Yoongi even insisted on staying on the phone to talk to you until you fell asleep too.

J-Hope (Jung Hoseok)

Your husband Hoseok was a superstar and his popularity was growing day by day. His fan base exceeded national boundaries so naturally he was gone a lot. Be it for a world tour, schedules in other countries or a collaboration with a western artist.

This time he had a 3 months tour all over America and had to stay there a little longer for the promotion of his new song with the newest big female artist in the USA right now.

Though you knew that you had to share your s/o with more than 30 Mio people, you didn’t mind because you knew that in the end you were the one he was married to and had two children with. Plus, you were an army too, so how could you be jealous knowing how important he was to them and vise versa.

Getting jealous because of his popularity would be stupid anyways because Hoseok was one of the most social and charismatic people you ever got to know, so you were sure that even if he wasn’t famous he’d still be gaining the attention of many people. But that wasn’t a bad thing, after all if he wasn’t that outgoing you doubt that you would have gotten to know each other.

So yeah, you were pretty proud of your husband for being so successful in the thing he loved to do. And when he was away you showed your support by watching every show and interview he did. It even became a family tradition for you and your son and daughter to gather in front of the TV every time you knew he was going to be on.

All three of you loved to see him goofing around on screen since lately that was the only way you got to see him.

His new collab song came out a week ago so he was in the middle of promotion and since the song was at the top of the charts a lot of shows demanded his appearance. So every day he was juggling between schedules, went back to the hotel very late and was too exhausted to call. During the preparation of the sind he also was drowning in work. J-Hope was a perfectionist so he stayed at the studio day and night in company of the singer he was making the song with, so every time you called he would tell you that he was busy working with her.

Now, as said before, you weren’t the jealous time at all but seeing how much time he spent with her and how much you were neglected in the process really didn’t sit right with you. And the fact that you saw how well (maybe even too well) they got along with each other on shows didn’t help. You knew fully well that Hoseok wouldn’t cheat on you and you couldn’t help the jealousy that was growing inside of you. You thought to yourself that you only felt that way because you hadn’t seen nor talked to him in so long.

Even so, you didn’t want to let it show in front of your kids since you didn’t want them to think that there was anything wrong with their parents, so you continued to watch the shows and interviews with them every day suppressing the feeling and casting a fake smile on your face.

You thought you were doing a great job at faking it but your son was old enough to notice that there was something wrong with you and he was clever enough to figure out the reason after seeing your smile fall a little every time you saw Hobi laugh with his new friend. He also noticed your general mood deteriorate more and more every time his father didn’t answer your calls.

As he watched you one day try to call your husband once more and sigh when he didn’t pick up your son had enough. He picked up his own phone and opted for messaging you seeing as he knew his father wasn’t going to answer anyways.

You’re an asshole. Hope you know that.

Even though he felt bad for cursing out his father his anger was bigger.

As expected, his father didn’t didn’t respond right away, in fact he didn’t see the message until 3 hours later but as soon as he saw it his heart sank and he immediately called his son racking his brain about what he could have done for his son to suddenly have such a bad image of him.

The 13 year old answered the phone with an eye roll. “Oh so your phone does work. Good to know.”

“Buddy? You alright?” Was all Hoseok said, making the young boy roll his eyes yet again.

“You would know if you called more often… or as all.” Hobi was sure he heard a hint of sadness hiding behind all the sass he definitely inherited from you.

“I’m sorry, bud. I just have so much to do that I barely ever have any time on my own and when I do it’s already the middle of the night over there.” Excuses, excuses is what your son thought.

“Yeah because you’re always with that other woman.” Your son replied now letting his guards down and letting his sadness show. On the other end of the line Hoseok was shocked by his son’s words. His son didn’t think he was cheating on you, did he?

“W-What do you mean?” Hobi asked carefully.

“Every time mom calls you you say that you’re busy with her. You’re making mom sad And I don’t like seeing her like that.”

Hobi sighed, “ Listen to me, okay? I love your mother very very much and I would never even think of doing something that would make me lose her and you and your sister in the process. I didn’t realize I made it seem as if I was hurting your mother on purpose. I wasn’t.”

“Tell that to her then. She acts like there’s nothing wrong but I can see that she’s just faking.” Although still worried for his mom he was actually very glad to hear his father say that.

He was just like you and preferred to hide his feelings so he would never let it show but he was actually very scared that his parents would split up.

“I will, kid. Thanks for making me aware of it.” He was very proud and happy to know that his son was turning into a real man protecting his mother.

“I’ll call her now. I’ll talk to you and your sister later, okay? Love and miss you lots.” He added

“I love you too, dad. Come home soon. Oh and dad?”

“Hm?”

“I’m sorry I called you an asshole.” Your son said bashfully, making his father laugh.

“It’s okay, but this better be the last time you talk to me like that.” Hobi answered semi-seriously.

“Yes, sir.” On that note they ended the call and Hobi didn’t miss a moment to call you.

RM (Kim Namjoon)

We all know that Namjoon is a very serious man when it comes to his work. I mean, he has to be, he is the leader of one of the most successful groups right now.

Off stage, Namjoon is also the best husband and father to your daughter. Always there for you two when you need it and when you don’t, the best support that you could ask for.

But with being the leader of BTS and of your family comes great responsibility, and as a result great stress. Between having to overview every schedule they have (and they have a lot), making sure everyone is Problem free and healthy both physically and mentally, making their songs, making sure everyone learns the songs and choreography and that the performances are perfect, playing the translator when they are overseas and having to take care or you and your 6 year old daughter there was not much time to work on his sanity. Don’t get me wrong, he loved doing all that, it was just… a bit much at times. Like now.

They had been on tour for 5 months now and they’re last break was too long ago to remember, meaning that Namjoon had been working non-stop for far too long. And he was already working on their next album that was supposed to come out soon after the tour, giving him extra work. He had no time to go visit the cities, no time to just hang out with the members and definitely no time to call you, and even though he was trying to not let it all get to him, it definitely was. And the fact that he had trouble with the song he was currently writing was not helping him very much.

In Korea, you were helping your daughter finalize the present she was making for her father for Father’s Day today.

She might be just 6 but she definitely had inherited Joon's incredible intelligence and creativity. That is why her present couldn’t be just a drawing of you three standing next to a house with a sun in the corner of the drawing.

She insisted on making an album full of pictures of her and her daddy with small notes and descriptions telling him why she loves him and her favorite memories of him.

She just started school so she couldn’t write very well but she still wanted to do it herself so right now you were just dictating her the words for the last note.

“All done mommy!” She exclaimed with a big toothless grin.

“Yay well done girlie! Shall we call daddy now and show him?”

Hearing your words, you saw her eyes light up. She didn’t waste a second before dashing to get your phone and coming back to where she left the album, making you giggle at her excitement.

You started the FaceTime call but went to stand outside of the frame right after. As mature as she wanted to act, your daughter was only 6 so you knew that Namjoon not making it to the ‘Bring you father to school day’ that her school was organizing for Father’s Day

As soon as she saw her father’s face she started beaming.

“Hi daddy!! Look what I ma-“ but her excitement was cut short by an annoyed voice.

“Y/D/N didn’t I tell you to stop taking people’s phones?” You were shocked by your husband's words and even more by his tone. Never has he ever spoken to her like that.

“But I-“ your daughter tried to explain herself but was cut off by her father once again.

“No buts young lady. You’re daddy’s busy, I can’t always talk when you want to. That’s why you should always wait for me to call or for your mother to call me. Now put the phone back where you found it.” And he ended the call.

You could see the tears forming in your daughter’s eyes as she kept on staring at the screen her usually loving father was just seconds ago.

Without a word you went over to where she was sitting and took her in your arms where she started sobbing.

You really didn’t know what was up with Namjoon. Usually even when he was majorly stressed he never talked like that. He was the most pacifist person you had ever seen and hated arguments. And seeing his little mini-me usually helped him destress.

It took you an hour to calm your daughter down and she finally fell asleep in your arms. You carried her into her room and put her in bed, careful not to wake her up.

With a heavy sigh you went back into the living room and retrieved your phone from the table. You took a picture of the album, sent it to your husband and wrote: Y/D/N made this for you. It’s a photo album with all the best memories she was with you. She was already upset enough that you can’t make it to “Bring Your Father To School Day” but you had to be pissy to her when she just wanted to show you her present? I know you probably are very stressed out because of everything and I understand it and I respect it. That’s why I refrain on calling you too often, but the one time I do, for Y/D/N sake btw, you react like that. That‘s really not cool, Namjoon.

Namjoon read the message you left him, and only then did it down on him how awful he was to your daughter and guilt started building in side of him at a rapid speed.

“Fuck.“

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yehetalltheway · 4 years ago

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A BORING SUMMER

Description: meeting him was fate. I remember his smile, his eyes they gave me comfort but then it was all gone. Will I ever meet him? Or are my insecurities going to win again.

Pairing: Sehun x Reader

Word count: 1,205

A/N: this picture does not belong to me. credits to the owner.

The most boring time of the year was here, I wish I could say that I was excited but honestly this time of the year was as boring as it could get. Being a second year student at a university is easy as long as you ain’t working, but the second you take a job, well there goes your happiness. I too had plans for my vacation up until my stupid best friend decided to ditch me and go for a little couple’s adventure with her boyfriend.

And so here am I at 10am in the morning, working at a café (where my best friend and I were going to work together btw). But its okay, I can do this. Here comes a customer. “Smile y/n smile.”

Just like this, a smile would always appear as soon as he would arrive. A complete stranger, I don’t even know his name or how old he is, but something felt just right but wrong at the same type. We all have an aura and to put in simpler terms his one was dark and luminous at the same time. I guess that it why I fell.

It’s been 3 weeks since his first arrival and at this point I know his proper schedule. He comes in at 11:30, orders an Iced Americano or sometimes when he is happy he choses Chocolate Boba Tea (but that is rare), he sits beside the window and stares. His eyes wonder as if they have no particular destination, as if they are just trying to take everything and everyone in, but soon after they land, they find my own.

Today was different, he walked in just like he always does, a freshly steamed suit adores his body. Shockingly today he speaks for longer than 5 seconds, his beautiful voice melts and I am dumbfounded.

“It’s a beautiful day, don’t you think?”, says he.

I try to find my words but they don’t come out.

“What I mean is that although the sun is at its peak, the rays they dance as if they are meeting the ground for the first time.”

“Ummm... the day... yeah its pretty.” oh lord what, why am I fumbling. Stop acting as if you have never met a hot guy before!

“I can’t help but notice that you are quite dressed up today. Any special occasion?”

OH MY GOD, does he know that I dressed up extra today (face palm). Wait is he noticing me?

“Ummm... No. Just felt like it. Uhhh I don’t have a boyfriend.” wait what, did I just say I don't have a bf. What is wrong with me???

But then I heard it the most beautiful thing in this world, his laughter. Not to sound weird but I can listen to his laugh all the damn time. His calm and serious composure broke in a second and his eyes curled beautifully. How can someone be so handsome and cute at the same time?

“Well then isn’t it my luck day.” And with that he left, he didn’t even sit down, he just took his coffee and left.

God I have never been as embarrassed as I am today, after what happened yesterday I hope he forgets that this place existed. For a minute I thought that he had. As soon as the closing time came around my stomach was filled with nervousness and anxiety what an idiot am I. But then the door opened and there he, only this time he smiles and waves AT ME!!

“Hi. You look as pretty as always. Can I get 1 Chocolate boba tea and 1 whatever your favorite is.” he said as if I hadn’t said anything embarrassing the day prior.

“Right... my favorite?? Are you expecting company??” , to be honest I would get jealous if he says yes. Weirdly enough I have developed a crush on him and i would break my tiny little heart if he says yes.

“YES... yes I am.” he says, or should I say he screamed it out. Well he didn’t have to rub it on me like that.

“YOU.” wait what did he just say.

“ME?? You are asking me to coffee??”

“Yeah if its okay with you.”

That is how we got close, his scheduled changed, instead of coming in the morning he came during the evening close to the end of my shift. We would drink some coffee, talk a lot and walk our way back.

His name is Oh Se Hun, his work - he doesn’t talk about it much but from what I know he works in a family business. Although he is 4 years older than me, never have I ever felt uncomfortable with him.

“You know, there are people in this world who enter your life at the right time, just when you need them the most. They stay with you until they are needed and then just like they entered, they leave. Honestly, you came into my life when I needed it the most, but I am scared that you want me to leave yours as quickly as I entered.”, he says, while he played with my head was lying on his lap and he was caressing my hair.

“What do you mean? Are you telling me that you are leaving or is it just one of your lame philosophical talks. Se Hun, you are scaring me, would you please answer!” I don’t know why but I am scared, as if all of this was just a dream and that I am going to wake up and become my old, unhappy, introverted self.

Being with Se Hun has changed me, my shy self has started talking more, everyone around me is shocked by this change. I have started smiling more, my colleagues definitely think I need to see a doctor cause my lips are always up. He is a ray of sunshine in my dark boring life and without him I’ll be broken and damned.

That was the last time I ever saw him. With those words he disappeared, into thin air as if he never existed. My summer love. That day, I wish I would have kissed him, hugged him, told him how I felt. But I didn’t, I couldn’t. I couldn’t stop thinking why would someone like him, like someone like me. Would he have stayed if I would have confessed? Was he trying to tell me something every time he held my hand as if I was a baby who would get separated from him? Was he just a summer feeling or was he my knight in a black tailored suit?

Whatever the reason may have been, I had lost him forever. I lost him to my insecurities, to my doubts and now he was gone.

Here I am 3 years later, applying for a job at a company just minding my own business when I bump into someone. It’s the same old smile, the same dark eyes, the same scent, even the way my name rolls out of his tongue is the same.

The only difference is, that I have changed thanks to him. This time I have held onto him and I won’t let go that easy.

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whorefordazai · 4 years ago

Note

ahaha hey bestie 😎 congrats on 600 you hottie!! i’m proud of you af 💕

for the matchups, uHm my pronouns are she/her, i’m a scorpio sun and aries moon, i’m a leedle bit short (5’2) and i have like shoulder length black hair and i wear glasses cause i’m blind asf. i don’t have a preference for getting matched with a guy or girl

i like to write, sing, paint and edit occasionally. hmm my love language on the receiving end is words of affirmation but on the giving end it’s gifts. i’m SUPER introverted and shy so it usually takes a lot for me to fully trust someone but once i get close to you i’m chaotic as hell. i guess my aesthetic is mostly just soft things like plushies, neutral colors, sweets, etc. i’m an akutagawa and chuuya kinnie soo...that says a lot. ooh and my favorite colors are pale blue or a peach

aHH okay my dream date has always been either a amusement park date or an arcade one cause i’m a sucker for cliches like that where we compete against each other or like the guy wins the girl a plushy yk?

okay i think that’s it hdfhs hopefully this wasn’t too long and congrats again bae luv youu ♡

I match you with...(it was kinda based hehe😎)

Osamu Dazai! ´ˎ˗

👾 you mentioned you like to paint and write, and dazai is clingy so guess what—he’ll follow you around and stay with you when you decide to do some painting or writing 🥰 at first he won’t talk as much, he’ll just put on some headphones and hum along with his music. but don’t be fooled—the peace won’t even last an hour cuz he’ll get bored and whine to you. he’ll physically drop his lanky body over yours with his arms over your shoulders from behind saying “come onnnn belladooonnaaa are you doooonnnee”

👾 dazai being chaotic at first glance 🤝 you being chaotic after getting to know someone. let’s just say dazai brings out your chaotic side way more than anyone else. it’s like he enables it the first time—you somehow get tangled along with him—and then it becomes a normal daily routine 🤔

👾 he’s a sucker for dates—anywhere tbh. but something about acting like a stupid cheesy couple makes him feel alive. he claims that he “feels like he’s gaining back the childhood he missed” when he’s with you. since he knows you’re basically blind without your glasses, he’ll purposely steal them and only give them back to you if you “give him 100 kisses.” this coincidentally happens every single day ☺️

👾 he spoils you like crazy. probably nothing expensive (cuz he’s broke af) but he’ll buy you tiny gifts like jewelry, paints, or basically anything. he’ll sometimes catch himself thinking about you like “would mich mich like that 🤔?” AWEEEWJ. but on the occasion he does buy something expensive for you—just assume he stole kunikida’s wallet 🙏

SONGS ´ˎ˗

- midnight love | girl in red

- bang! | AJR

- good old-fashioned lover boy | queen

- I wanna be yours | arctic monkeys

- sweater weather | the neighborhood

MESSY LAYOUT ´ˎ˗

ps. If you’re with dazai, there’s a guarantee you’ve burned something on the stove at least once 😎

#event match ups #bungou stray dogs #bungou stray dogs x reader #bsd dazai #bsd x reader #dazai x you

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oohyansi · 4 years ago

Text

ASYMPTOTE LINES.

"they always say to expect the unexpected, and sometimes you just have to go with the flow of life. i guess meeting you is not the worst thing after all; i never knew life could be this thrilling and beautiful again — i just hope you'll always choose to stay and never leave my side..."

PAIRING: idol jaehyun x idol reader

GENRE: fluff, angst, smut

WARNINGS: no warnings, just enjoy the ride & surprises (lol jk this would contain a lot of smut and fluff probably and a whole roller coaster ride)

CHARACTERS INTRO:

NCT as NCT, Jaehyun as the Jeong Jaehyun himself, You as a member of a 4-member girl group from SM Entertainment called IRIS, Johnny Seo as your cousin.

STATUS: coming soon.

PLOT: if there's one thing you can be compared to, that's a pretty solid rock. but everything changed when you finally decided to go back to Korea. entering the industry have let you meet people that that turned your life into something worth living again, and having him is one of the best part. from strangers to best friends, and who knows what's next? will it stay that way? will it be more than that? or will it fall apart?

PROLOGUE:

You have everything; the looks, the talents, the brains, and the perfect family. You are an only child, your family is known to be wealthy as your parents are both surgeons. Your parents might be busy at work, but they never failed to make you feel so loved. Little did you and your father knew, your mother was suffering from depression. You have everything — but not until she passed away. Your family became a mess and your father decided to leave and settle in another country for the both of you to move on with your lives. You were 10 years old when you moved to Canada, stayed there and studied Psychology. You are an excellent student, that's why you got accelerated and graduated earlier. Your father — he overworked himself. It's like as if you lost him as well with your mother. He still provided you with the comfortable life and everything you need, aside from attention and affection. This is why you grew up to be so reserved, an introvert, who forgot to express affection and how it felt; you became cold and heart could barely feel emotions at all. You never healed.

After you graduated, something in your mind sparked up. You ponder on things, a voice echoed in the back of your head, it was your mother's voice. She would often remind you that "life is beautiful" and that no matter what happens, always find a reason to continue and have the courage to keep going. This leads you to feeling the urge to go back home, and face everything you left there; all the memories that comes with pain, waiting for you — thinking that if you could finally and accepted what happened fully, you'll be able to overcome that burden in your heart for so long, hoping that you can live your life again. One night, without thinking, you booked yourself a flight to Korea and called your father, who's at work in the hospital, telling him you'll go back to Korea and you already made up your mind, although you know to yourself that you do not have any plans as you go back. He just agreed and said he's ask your cousin, Johnny, to pick you up and help you settle as you go back. You love your father and didn't want to leave him alone, you felt a bit of guilt, even though it seemed like he left you first. You love him but a part of you won't deny the fact that you hated him a little for almost forgetting he still has a daughter who needs him. But that's long gone, you don't need anyone anymore. You've become independent, so used to and comfortable with your own, not having the slightest need to depend on anyone.

7:00pm Seoul, South Korea

After a long flight, you finally arrived. Slowly opening your eyes as your plane landed, seeing a familiar place through the plane window where your heart beats rapidly for the first time in a while, you felt home. As you walk out the airport, your eyes instantly wandered looking for a familiar face. On the right side, you saw a hella tall guy with a wide smile plastered in his face, looking and waving at you. There he is, your older cousin Johnny waiting for you. You both aren't that close with each other since you both grew up in a different place, yet back when you were young and everything was fine, you played with each other a lot in family gatherings. He would send you messages on your birthday or holidays to greet you, you knew he's busy since he debuted as an idol. He also occasionally sends you messages asking how have you been, knowing how broke you've become after your mother's death. Seeing him again feels nostalgic and warm. You walked fast towards him and he welcomed you open arms giving you a quick yet tight hug, and you did the same as you both smiled.

"It's been a while, Y/N. You're all grown up now." He said after the hug, with a warm smile, patting your head like he used to before when you get annoyed by his teases when you were just kids. "How have you been?" He asked.

"Pretty good, hyung." You answered with a soft smile, although it's a lie. You've never been good for the past 9 years. You used to call him hyung before and not oppa for no reason. "You're the one who grew up hyung, look at you! I look like a tiny kid standing in front of you." You let out a small laugh, joking about his height as he also laughed, but quickly displayed a shocked expression in his face as he forgot something.

"Ah- by the way Y/N, i'm actually with someone here" He said as he slowly moved to his side, revealing another person standing behind him since earlier.

"This is Jaehyun, he's my member and a good friend. I asked him to come with me, you know, it's boring to drive alone" he said with a small laugh while scooting more to the side, giving you a full look on the guy he's referring to. You knew your cousin is an idol, you can sometimes saw their group's performances while scrolling through your phone, but you never really got to know about them. You had no interest, you rarely had interest in anything aside from studying. But you are so proud of your cousin just knowing that he finally fulfilled his dream.

Your eyes landed on him, you took a quick yet good look on him, enough to notice he's just wearing a casual attire with a pair of ripped jeans and a black shirt, looking so soft with his hair down.

"Hi, Y/N." He gave you a smile, and his deep dimples on the sides of his cheek did not remain unnoticed by you. Actually, it got you a little distracted; but you weren't that amazed. You've seen a lot of good looking guys back in Canada, majority of them asking you out, but you never really went out with anyone. You got no time and interest in dating, you couldn't even feel emotions by yourself.

"Hi, I'm Y/N. Nice to meet you" You said with a smile back, handing your hand over him for a hand shake. You noticed how he was staring at you with eyes you cannot explain what those meant, before he looked at your hand, back to your face. He reached his hands to meet yours.

"Me too." and the moment your hand touched, you felt how warm and soft his hands are, you felt a little flustered on how tight his hand holding yours, not tight enough to hurt tho. You held hands a little longer than the usual handshake would take, before you retreat your hand from him softly, beaming him another smile. You noticed how Johnny's eyes looked at you and Jaehyun for a couple of times with a very small smile on his mouth, almost not visible but you sort of knew what it meant. They gave each other a quick look you did not noticed as you looked at your phone to check the time.

"Y/N, it's half past 7:00, have you eaten?" Johnny asked.

"Not yet hyung. Have you? Let's go for dinner?" You replied to as he took your baggage.

"Sure! Bet you missed korean food, where do you want to eat?" Johnny asked as you walked out of the airport heading to the parking lot where his car parked. You are on the left side of Johnny, while Jaehyun is in his right side.

"Choose for me hyung, I haven't been here for almost half of my life. I could barely recall the restaurants we used to dine before" You said chuckling softly, realizing how long you've been away from the place that's supposed to be your home.

"Yeah, you never visited! You like Vancouver that much?" He said with a playful whine and you just smiled at him when you already reached the parking lot and his car. He started to put your luggage in the trunk, Jaehyun helping him.

"Nah, I didn't liked it that much, Vancouver is a great place but... nothing beats home, i guess? I just needed to stay there with no choice." You said and the last few words were said in almost a whisper. You're chuckling, but Johnny knew what you meant.

He walked to you and put his hand on the top of your head again and pat it, "Well you're here now! We'll pick up all you left and missed out, don't worry." He said, giving you an assuring smile. You gave a genuine smile back, knowing that this is the start of putting your life back into place. You sure had a lot of worries on your mind, not knowing where to even start or what to do, but all you hope for is that you don't regret coming back.

You all went to the car, you sat on the passenger seat while Jaehyun sat at the back. While choosing for a restaurant, Johnny asked Jaehyun for his suggestion and you all agreed to go on his favorite restaurant, it is a 45-minute drive from the airport but it's just fine as you can relax a bit in the car after your long flight. Johnny played relaxing music and asked you about your graduation, how have you been, and random stuffs for the first 20mins while the rest of the time he just let you rest on the seat.

Along the quite long drive, you did not fail to notice Jaehyun looking at you through the rearview mirror. You pretended you did not notice it, but you can feel his stares back and forth the mirror and your back.

JAEHYUN'S POV

Fuck. The moment I saw her walking out of the airport with that smile as she recognized Johnny, realizing she's that 'cousin' we're about to pick up, I couldn't believe my eyes. Of course I acted cool, but hell, I couldn't take my eyes off her. She's so beautiful. I felt my insides shuffle a little when I heard her voice, she sounds like an angel. I can smell her when she got close, and damn. She smells so good.

Seeing beautiful faces have become normal for me, for us in the entertainment industry, but I am lost for words for her beauty, I'm not even sure if the word beauty is enough to describe her. Her long hair just lying on her waist, wearing a pair of knee length boots and a black dress and coat, she looked perfect. How come someone out there, who's supposed to be in Korea, looking this good, just flashing right in front of my eyes just now?

What took you so long?

Those are the words on the back of my mind. She handed out her hand to me, I hesitated shortly before taking it, thinking 'am I even allowed to touch her hands?' God, she seemed like a porcelain, too fragile to touch and to beautiful to hold her hand for free. Her hand felt so soft that I don't even want to let go. I knew Johnny noticed it too, I almost lost my cool. Giving me the look, I know he understood.

i'm damned. i did not believe the idea of love at first sight, until now.

------------------------------------------------------------

author's note:

hi!! i'm actually hesitant to write this one, this is my first. I had this story on my head for quite a long time now, lol being an nctzen really get your imagination worked up 😆 I just wrote this semi long prologue to know if I should countinue this one or just keep this imagination to myself lol. PLS let me know if you're interested on how this delulu story would go. if you say so, I'm willing exert effort in writing this the best way I could to deliver the story at it's best too. all the love, czennies!!

ps. I am jungwoo biased but jaehyun, this guy... I know we can all agree that he has a special place in our hearts, that's why he's the main character in here. 🤍

and the title, i'm not a fan of mathematics but I loved the concept of lines. you can search what asymptote lines means... 😉

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obx-adventures · 4 years ago

Text

The Introverted Twin

Summary - Being John B’s bookish twin isn’t easy. Especially with my best friend, Pope, being weird about me getting closer with JJ.

Warning: Medical conditions and procedures described (as accurately as I could)

A/N - Flashbacks are in italics. This chapter may have been my favorite to write.

Catch up here: Ch 1, Ch 2, Ch 3, Ch 4, Ch 5, Ch 6, Ch 7, Ch 8

——

Chapter 9

I regain consciousness in the ambulance but am very disoriented. The first thing I notice is the neck brace keeping my head still, followed shortly by wet drops hitting my face. I try to determine the source of the wetness and realize that Kie is leaning over me and sobbing.

“Kie…” Her eyes shoot open as a new round of sobs overtake her diminutive frame.

“Y/N? Oh my God! Are you… how are… I’m so glad your awake!”

“JJ?” My voice is barely a whisper but the concern in my eyes tells Kie exactly what information I’m searching for.

“He’s in the other ambulance. He woke up as they were loading him in and was screaming for you.”

“He… is he…”

“I don’t know if he’s ok. Only that he woke up before we left. I called JB but I think his phone is dead. I was able to get ahold of Sarah and she was going to pick him up.” I’ve exhausted all of my energy and my eyes flutter closed. I hear Kie’s worried gasp and squeeze her hand to let her know I’m still awake.

When we get to the hospital, I struggle to open my eyes but fail. As soon as the doors open, I hear JJ screaming my name. The effect of his voice is like a shot of adrenaline to the heart. I try to sit up to look for him but am pushed back down by the paramedic. Kie jumps out and I hear her telling JJ that I woke up.

As I’m being rolled into the emergency room, Kie screams JJ’s name loudly. From the rush of doctors and nurses that run to him, I know it’s bad.

“Kie! Kiara!” I yell as loud as I can and am frustrated when it comes out as barely more than a whisper. I try to sit up again to see what happened and feel a stabbing pain in my ribs. This doesn’t stop me from continuing to push myself up, but I’m overcome with a sudden difficulty to breath. Before I understand what’s happening, my vision goes black and I slip back into the abyss.

----

There is a soft knock on my door, and I tell the person to come in without looking up from my SAT prep book. Even though I’m not starting my prep class until school starts back up in a couple months, I want to get a head start on the most important test of my life.

“Y/N, can I talk to you for a few minutes?” Hearing Kie’s voice shocks me into looking up. Without thinking, I lunge forward to hug her.

“Kie! I haven’t seen you since September! How are you?”

While all the Pogues have been hesitant about her return from her year at the Kook Academy, I’m just glad to see Kiara Carrera again. Being surrounded by boys all the time for the past 9 months has been exhausting.

“I’m ok. I came to apologize.” Kie’s face is full of pain and I realize just how difficult this past school year has been for her.

“You don’t need to apologize to me.” I pull her back to sit down next to me on the bed.

“Yes, I do. I’m so sorry that I haven’t been around. I’ve missed you. There were so many times during this past year when I wished I could call you.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“I knew the guys were pissed at me and I guess I just assumed you would be too.”

“I wasn’t pissed at you. I just missed you.” I wrap my arm around her shoulders and give her a reassuring squeeze. Kie starts to cry as she leans into me.

“The Kooks were awful, and I thought that if I leaned into Kook life, it would get better. I stopped hanging out with you guys and became friends with the Kook Princess. But it all fell apart and I was so lonely. I wanted to talk to my best friend.”

“You could have called John B! He was hurt but he would have understood.” At this, Kie lifts her head off my shoulder and leans away to look at me.

“I meant you.”

“I’m your best friend?”

“Why is that a surprise?”

“I just thought that I was John B’s sister to you, like I am with everybody else.” I shrug and look down at my hands in my lap. JJ and Pope are the only friends I’ve ever had. Most girls either ignore me or treat me like I have the plague, but Kie has always been kind and excited to see me. I thought she was just placating me so I wouldn’t feel weird when she was here with John B.

“I guess I have to apologize again then. We may have met because I became friends with the guys but then we started spending almost every day together and you started to relax around me. I got to see how funny and sweet you are. Even though you seem so shy, you have no problem putting the boys in their place. We both know that your dad and JB have no idea what their doing so you’ve had to run this place. Most teenage girls think about clothes and makeup and boys. But you worry about the electrical bill, cooking dinner, and making doctors appointments for all of you. It’s amazing. You’re amazing, Y/N.”

----

When I open my eyes this time, I hear my brother yelling at someone.

“That is my sister! I need to see her! Move!”

“JB…”

“No, Y/N, don’t try to talk.” The nurse currently taking my vitals tries to soothe me.

“Tell him… ok…” I plead with my eyes and the nurse turns to my brother who is still trying to push past someone to get into the room.

“Mr Routledge, your sister’s eyes are open and she’s asked me to tell you she’s ok. But I need you to wait outside because you’re upsetting her. I promise you can talk to her in a couple minutes.” He falls silent and I can practically hear the wheels turning in his head. I raise my hand a few inches to signal him that I really am awake.

“Ok, Y/N, I’ll be right back.”

A few minutes later, true to her word, the nurse ushers my brother into my room. He grabs my hand like it’s a life line and I open my eyes to try to meet his. I get ready to talk but my brother shushes me.

“No, no. Don’t talk. You have a severely bruised… ummm, the voice box thing and a few of your ribs broke off and put a hole in your lung. The doctor put a tube in to help you breath but they are getting you ready for surgery to fix the ribs so there isn’t more damage.” I whine a little and try to convey the urgent question I can’t ask. “JJ has a few broken ribs and a really bad concussion but he’ll be ok.”

I sigh in relief and immediately wince in pain. John B worries over me as the nurse comes back in to tell him they need to take me for a CT scan before my surgery. I fall back under as they transfer me over to the CT table.

----

“John B, I need you to eat. Please.” My brother doesn’t even acknowledge that I’ve walked into the room. His sandwich is still untouched in front of him, exactly how it was when I checked on him 15 minutes ago. “It’s been a week. I’m worried you’re going to pass out.”

“I’m not hungry.” I sit next to him and turn his face to look at me. “Just leave me alone.”

“No, Bird. I won’t –”

“Don’t call me that!” I jump back at his outburst. The anger falls from his face when he sees the look on mine. “Sorry… I didn’t… Sorry… it’s just… Dad calls me that.”

“So do I, JB. I always have.” My voice is full of all the pain that I’ve been carrying this week.

“It hurts too much…”My twin has been like this since our father disappeared a week ago. He is not only dealing with losing our dad but also his guilt over the terrible fight they had before he left. He won’t eat, barely sleeps, and hasn’t showered since we filed the missing persons report. I finally got him to drink water a couple days ago by threatening to call ‪911‬ if he didn’t. At least now I don’t need to keep checking him for signs of dehydration.

“Ok, JB... I’ll make you a deal. You start eating and I won’t call you that.” He scoffs at me and looks away. “I’m serious. I need you. I can’t lose you and that’s what will happen if you don’t take care of yourself.”

“Don’t be dramatic, Y/N.”

“I’m not being dramatic. Pope looked it up for me. You haven’t eaten anything in a week. That’s dangerous.”

“I’m fine. I’m not even hungry.”

“You’re in the first stages of grief. The stress throws off your appetite. But it doesn’t mean you don’t need to eat. Please, JB… Please…”I feel the panic attack building and start to stand up to go to my room. I’ve spent the past week consoling my twin and trying to hide the impact our dad’s disappearance has had on me. John B catches my hand before I can get too far away.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry, Y/N. I know this has been hard on you, too.” He pulls me back down to the couch and throws his arms around me. “I’ll try to do better.”

“What if we split the sandwich?”

“Deal,” he says as he kisses me on the cheek. “I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too, JB.”

----

“When are they taking her into surgery?” I’m not fully awake yet but I can hear how scared JJ sounds.

“A few minutes. None of us are supposed to be in here but John B sweet talked the nurse.” I feel a bit better hearing Kie comforting him but I still fight to open my eyes, desperate to see that he’s ok. My eyes flutter open and JJ moves closer to me.

“Sunshine? Are you awake?” I squeeze the hand that’s holding mine, unsure if it’s his or Kie’s. “I’m right here. I got you.”

“Kie! Is she ok?” The new voice surprises me, giving me the jolt I need to fully open my eyes.

“Pope, she’s… she needs surgery…” Kie’s worry shines through her voice.

“Y/N! I’m right here! I’m so sorry…” He breaks during his apology and I try to comfort him through my eyes.

“See, Sunshine. We’re all here for you.” I look over at him and my eyes fill with tears when I see the bruises forming. “No, don’t cry… I’m ok. Don’t worry about me.”

“JJ, what happened?!” My eyebrows knit in confusion. I try to look back at him but he moves out of my field of vision. My eyes snap back to JJ to watch his reaction.

“Pope! Calm down. This isn’t JJ’s fault and you know it.” Kie’s admonishment is firm but JJ’s expression is full of guilt. “I was next to John B when he was telling you what happened. Don’t pick a fight.”

“No J…” All three of them turn at my voice. “Not… your… fault…”

“Shhh, don’t talk,” Kie tells me. “We all know this isn’t JJ’s fault. I’ll keep reminding him while you’re in surgery.”

“Pope…” My best friend cuts me off by putting a finger over my mouth.

“Kie’s right, Y/N. I know it’s not his fault. I’m just… I’m scared is all. I’ll be better. Just don’t talk. Please.” He wipes tears off my cheeks and smiles weakly at me. “It’s my fault, not his.”

“Pope, dude, this was my dad. Not me, not you.” I try to nod at JJ’s words but discover I’m in a new neck brace that I didn’t pay attention to until now.

“If I wasn’t such an ass when she told me about you guys, she wouldn’t have needed to go find you at your house.”

“Pope, I convinced her to go find JJ. I should have seen his dad’s truck when we got there and stopped her from going inside.” I whine after Kie’s done and have never been more frustrated that I can’t talk.

“Guys, stop. The nurses are coming so we need to clear out. None of you are to blame. And if Y/N could talk more than a couple words right now, she’d tell all of you the same thing. Luke Maybank did this to her and to JJ. And the cops have him so stop blaming yourselves.” My eyes shoot over to JJ to see how he’s handling all of this. We’ve all tried to talk him into reporting the abuse to the police but he’s always been adamant that he won’t. Now that choice has been taken from him.

“JJ, the cops are ready to talk to you,” my brother continues. “Kie, they may have some follow up questions so they asked that you stay. Y/N, the doctors told them that they couldn’t talk to you yet but I’m sure they’ll be here when you wake up.”

“Ms Routledge, it’s time to go. Mr Maybank, you should be in your room. The rest of you can wait down the hall.” The nurses start unhooking my IV and monitor wires, giving me a moment with each of the Pogues. I brush my fingers over JJ’s cheek, squeeze Kie’s and Pope’s hands, and whisper that I love my brother. One of the nurses inject a sedative into my IV line and then wheel me out of my room.

----

“Hey, Y/N! What are you doing out here?” I actively avoid looking at my best friend as he sits next to me on the end of the pier. I hide my hands under my legs so he can’t see that my fingernails are bit down to nubs, a sure sign of my current mental state.

“Hi Pope. I’m just hiding from John B…”He places his hand on my knee to comfort me and traces light circles on my exposed skin.

“Why?” His voice is so gentle and I’m afraid that if he offers me more comfort, I’ll completely fall apart.

“The police were here a little bit ago… they’ve officially stopped the search for my dad…” Pope knows that no words will be enough right now so he opts to wrap his arms around me and pulls my head to his shoulder. “I don’t know how to tell him, Pope. I just got him to start eating more a couple days ago. What if he… what if I lose him too?”

“You won’t lose him. All of us will be here to help both of you.” I start sobbing into Pope’s chest, finally letting myself feel every ounce of pain that’s been building up over these past 2 weeks. I’ve tried so hard to just focus on being there for John B that I haven’t done anything to take care of myself. I sit in Pope’s arms for a while and let someone take care of me for once.

After my mom left when we were kids, my dad tried his best to take care of us. But it was a mess. I finally took over when we were 11 after my dad sent John B and I with moldy sandwiches. It was right around the same time that Pope and I were partnered up for a project for the first time in gifted science. We were eating lunch together and he shared everything he had with me after I spit out the first bite of my sandwich. I confessed how chaotic my home life has been and Pope decided to help me set up some systems for tracking and paying bills, meal planning, and every other aspect of running a home. With his support, I whipped us all into shape. He was so excited about all the organization and planning that I’m not sure if he fully understands that I wouldn’t have been able to keep my family together without him.

“Do you want me to be there when you tell him? I can call JJ and Kie too so he sees that he still has a family.” I turn to look at my best friend and thank the universe for sending me someone to help bear my burdens.

“Yes, please. Thank you, Pope.” I kiss his cheek and pull him into a fierce hug. I feel like I can finally breath now.

“I’m always here for you, Y/N. Always.”

----

“There you are, Sunshine.” My head jerks up in surprise. I didn’t expect anyone to find me in my closet.

“Why aren’t you at the party, JJ?” Today is mine and JB’s 10th birthday party. Of course, since I don’t have any friends, everyone is here for my brother.

“You ran away before I could give you your gift.” Instead of waiting for me to climb out of the closet, he sits down with me. He hands me a small package, wrapped in purple tissue paper.

“You got me a present?” My shock is evident in my voice. In all the years of birthday parties for the Routledge twins, no one has ever given me a gift.

“Of course! It’s your birthday, too.” JJ gently nudges me to open my gift. When I unwrap it, I discover a handmade bracelet, just like the ones JJ wears, in all my favorite colors. I look up at him and he gently takes it out of my hands to put it on my wrist.

“JJ… this is… thank you!” I can’t put into words how much this means to me so I try to convey it with a hug.

“I know you think that you don’t have any friends… but you have me…” JJ’s voice wobbles a little and I pull away to see how nervous he is. He kisses my forehead, stands up, and offers me his hand. Without hesitating, I take his hand and return to the party with him. In this moment, I realize I would go anywhere with and do anything for JJ Maybank.

----

“Y/N, I need you to open your eyes for me.” I fight against the remaining effects from the sedative to try to comply with the man’s request. When I finally get my eyes open, it takes every ounce of energy in me to keep them that way. “Good job. I’m Dr Row, we met in the emergency room but I’m not sure if you remember that. I did the surgery to repair your ribs and lung. Everything went well but we need to keep you in the surgical ICU at least for tonight.”

I try to nod at him but realize my neck brace is still on. My throat hurts much too badly now to try to speak so I offer a weak thumbs up.

“I know you’re in a lot of pain right now. You kept passing out because your body was overwhelmed with how much it hurts and your brain was trying to protect you. Your throat is very swollen and we’re worried about some of the cartilage there so we’re keeping you in the neck brace for now so you don’t accidently injure it more. I had to put in some hardware to put your ribs back together and you still have the tube in your side so pressure doesn’t build up in your chest cavity. You’ll stay in recovery a little longer and then your brother can see you in your room.”

After another 30 minutes or so, I’m taken to the ICU room. The doctor was right about the severity of my pain and I’m doing everything I can to stay awake so I can see John B. Finally, he’s ushered into the room and grips my hand gently, fear etched into every inch of his face.

“Y/N, I’m here. I’m right here.”

“J…” I eek out and my brother shushes me before I try again.

“JJ is with DCS right now…” A sob escapes my tender throat. “No, no, shhh. Kie, Pope, and their parents are with him. We won’t let him get taken away. Y/N! Y/N!”

I hear my brother yelling my name as the monitors start going wild but I can’t respond or open my eyes again. The darkness engulfs me once again despite my desperate efforts to stay with my brother.

One chapter left...

Taglist: @agirlwholovescoffee @obxlife @meaganjm @kaelyn-lobrutto24 @velyssaraptor @http-cherries @prejudic3 @love-youu-softly @rudyismymanperiod @justcallmesams @celestialmaybank @yasminesameh @chaoticbisous @liloddcora @obx-snippets @xx-randomshit-xx17 @thepanmermaid @rudysdiaries @cinnamonandspice1994 @sexualparkour @lasnaro @bibliophilewednesday @nicolecarsley @x-lulu @shantililacs @andreiaafaria @ficsforlexie @royalpurplehuskies @drewsephsmiles @yeslifeofateen @bluesiderudy @wandressfox @poguestyleskye @haute-shawn @nashielouise @lonely-kermit @negativity4you @wtfkie @httpstarkey @duskangxl @kay667

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michals · 4 years ago

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May I request some Allison and Ben and best wishes for your regular projects to get easier, I absolutely love your fics.

Firstly: 🥰🥰🥰 thank you!! Also this was very much inspired by this post by knif2thrower.

Nostalgia is tricky for Allison considering, well, everything. As soon as she left the house at 18 the majority of her past took on a harsh, ugly light. She’s always tried to move past it, tried not to look back and especially not let it get to her. But in the wake of two apocalypses and some disorganizing and reorganizing of the timeline and finally everything getting back to the way it should be – with a couple bonuses – she finds the memories don’t leave quite the bitter taste they used to.

A week past the re-righting of the universe finds her absently picking through her old bedroom, searching for nothing in particular except idle thoughts. A rare quiet moment in the house these days. When she finds the stack of old magazines they’d been in as kids she only means to flip through the top one, just a quick glance through. But the picture on the cover of the next one is so cute she has to check out the others inside too, and then naturally she goes through a third and soon enough she’s sitting cross legged on her bed with the magazines spread out in front of her as she browses through them.

They’re mostly teen beat magazines, simple colorful things meant for preteens with articles about dealing with crushes and homework. She laughs when she finds a picture of Lil Bow Wow she’d drawn a heart around. And the pictures of her and the others only make her feel sentimental. They’re smiling in all of them, posing goofily with their arms around each other, pulling mock superhero poses. She couldn’t help but like those photoshoots. They never got to leave the house except for missions and press and unlike the boring, serious articles in the newspapers and Time, when it came to Bop magazine they got to act like kids and talk about their favorite ice cream flavors.

A photo of her standing with the boys around her, her hands posed cheekily under her chin with Luther, Klaus, Diego and Ben around her gets to her. That had been a fun day. She runs a finger over it like she’s trying to smooth down Klaus’s messy lapel when the door whooshes open and Ben rushes into the room, swinging the door shut behind him but making sure it doesn’t slam. He whirls on her with his eyes wide, poised like a frightened rabbit.

Her heart rate immediately picks up. “What’s wrong? What happened?” They think they’re in the clear, almost sure that nothing’s gonna fall on their heads anymore but she can’t stop her mind from preparing for the worst.

“Nothing!” Ben chirps, stepping carefully into the room, scanning it like he’s looking for something, “Nothing’s wrong, I did nothing wrong.”

A smirk comes to her lips. Oh, she knows exactly what’s happening. “What’d you do and who’d you do it to?”

Ben breaks into a sly, knowing look. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, I would never. Unrelated but can I hide in here?”

Ben was supposed to be the shy one, quiet and introverted. He never spoke much in those interviews, shied away at too much attention. But all of them knew he was actually a little shit who pulled more pranks than any of them.

That he wants to hide tells Allison exactly who he played one on this time. “It was Five wasn’t it? In that case no, you have to deal with that on your own.”

“Really? You won’t help your own brother?” he puts his hand to his chest.

“Against my other brother?”

“You’re supposed to play favorites here,” Ben says shaking his head at her. There’s a distant thump and he practically throws himself on the floor and crawls over to the other side of the bed.

Allison leans over to look down at him. “What’d you do?” More conspiratorial than accusing.

Ben lays on his back, eyes innocent but his smirk giving him away. “Nothing! I just thought, maybe, Dolores might want to change up her look for spring is all.”

Allison reels back, laughing, “Oh you are so in for it!” But then she leans over further, eyes sparkling. “What color eyeshadow?”

“I was thinking pink but blue fit her so much better.”

Allison shakes her head at him. Ben had been one of those bonuses after they got back, a reward even. When they’d all landed on this side of it he’d been here, in the flesh and beaming. And he was the right one, he was their Ben. Allison hadn’t had to wonder if he’d fit in like he hadn’t been dead for so long because he’d dashed any doubts right away. He was bolder, perhaps, probably from years of Klaus’s influence, but he was him. This right here is proof of that.

She props her chin on her hand, “Remember when you told Diego people eat spiders in their sleep and you had just seen a big hairy one crawl into his room?”

Ben laughs. “Oh yeah, he slept with a bandana over his mouth for a month. Remember when I put a pebble in all your socks?”

Oh she remembers it now; she hadn’t noticed until they were in front of the cameras and she’d been on the evening news shuffling awkwardly the whole time. She’s not quite so nostalgic for that. “You little jerk,” but it’s fond.

This is what she likes about those silly teenage magazines, they could never actually show exactly who they were, especially the little hidden things like this, but they were the closest they ever got to appearing like actual kids. Sometimes a picture would manage to capture that mischievous twinkle in Ben’s eye.

“Remember when Luther broke that beaker and you told dad it was you?” she asks.

Ben’s smile is softer. “Yeah. I mean he looked like he was going to have a heart attack.” He shrugs his shoulders against the carpet. “Besides he did all my physics homework for a week.”

He hadn’t done it for that though, Allison knows, he’d been protecting Luther. That was who Ben was too.

“I’m glad you’re back,” she says, gentle sincerity in her voice. Ben smiles back, fond and happy.

Then there’s the distinct ‘thwip’sound of Five blinking from just outside the door and Ben’s eyes go wide and he scrambles to pull himself under the bed.

Allison’s just sitting up as Five suddenly appears in front of her. He looks over the room with narrowed eyes. “Where is he?”

Allison feigns ignorance. “Who?”

Five trains his skeptical gaze on her. “Ben. He’s around here somewhere.”

Allison shrugs, “I haven’t seen him, I’ve been here by myself all afternoon.”

He studies her face for a moment but only frowns deeper in frustration. Five’s shrewd but Allison is an actress after all. “If you see him tell him I’m going to find him.”

And in a flash he’s gone, she can hear him stomping around in the hall. Luther’s voice calls out:

“Five it’s not that bad! It’ll come off.”

“If you like it so much you let him do your eyeliner!” Five shoots back.

Klaus’s voice chimes in with, “Ooh I’d like to see that actually.”

Allison stays quiet for a long moment until the noises outside go away. Ben pops his head up over the side of the bed.

“Coast’s clear I think,” she tells him.

He gets to his feet, peeks outside and doesn’t see anyone.

“Thanks sis,” he says, makes to leave only to turn around and ask: “So tonight, when Luther’s asleep, you’re gonna help me with his eyeliner right?”

“Oh absolutely,” Allison says, as if there were any question.

He gives her a giddy grin before slipping out into the hallway. She shakes her head, chest tight with affection. She turns back to the magazine she has open in front of her. There’s a picture of Ben in it, his face in a big cheesy star graphic, and yeah, there it is, there’s that glimmer in his eye. She’s happy then that nostalgia doesn’t hurt so much anymore.

In the hallway there’s another ‘thwip’ followed by a panicked high pitched yelp.

#tua fic #umbrella academy fic #tua #the umbrella academy #allison hargreeves #ben hargreeves #this was fun and not something i would have thought to do otherwise thank you!#and thank you again for the compliment!!#my fic #t.ua

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missmorosis · 4 years ago

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hihiii bby🤧💕could i mayhaps have a valentine from hq?? and dw hun i'll talk to you forever mwuah❣️ (or however tf the kissing sound is spelt idk)

- my pronouns are she/her and i'd prefer a male valentine. i'm an INFP!!

- my love language is def physical touch and i'm a junkie for handholding!

- in a partner, i look for someone who i can trust with my crazy rants about space and books and stuff, someone who doesnt necessarily have to be clingy or vocal but is great at physical consolation cause i need a hug 25/8 istg and just someone who is energetic and a joy to be around and i can never be bored with. i just wanna stay up with someone at 3am belly laughing at the dumbest crap and stargazing cause y e s.

- my personality??? welp- im introverted at times but when im comfortable i can be the loudest most outrageous and sarcastic lil bish. im random at times with a little dash of intellect cause i love healthy debates. mostly, i just love goofing off and having fun and hugging ppl randomly cause i luv it!

- my hobbies are mostly singing, writing poetry and actual books, and just belting out musicals and cartoon theme songs cause why not!!! im like crazy asf tbh lmaooo but im just touch starved :(

- three things i do daily?? simp for fictional men, slide around in my socks cause im a dumbass anddd brush my hair cause its maadd thick so gotta brush it at least three times a day...

- lavender, your future wife 😭

KLJKALSJKLDF HII HAHA YES YES IT’S MWUAH!! i use mwahhh :D

also ugh marry me rn 🙄💍

NOYA!

must i explain 😌 super energetic, a total joy to be around, WILL SIMP FOR YOU, and UGHSDKFLJ i love him sm

how he asked you out

-> You grabbed for your hairbrush, groaning as you saw how messy your hair got in the span of a couple hours. Nishinoya frowned.

“That’s gotta hurt,” he commented, and you laughed.

“It does,” you huffed, and he gasped.

“Then why do you do it?”

“Gotta make my hair pretty, ya know?” He shook his head and took the hairbrush from you, stroking your hair gently.

“You’re already pretty, but I want to try!” You nodded, a small blush on your cheeks, and he smiled. He started from the top, going as gently as he could, all the way down to your roots.

When he was finished, your hair looked much worse than how it had been before. The two of your looked each other in the eye and burst out into laughter.

“Be my date?” he asked, out of nowhere. “You look gorgeous right now, and I would love it if you went out with me?” You giggled and nodded in response.

how you spent the day together

-> “That one’s pretty!” Noya exclaimed, pointing to a star in the night sky. The two of you were practically intertwined, laying on the lawn with a blanked under you. You were looking at the stars together, which was one of your favorite pastimes.

“Mhm, I like that one,” you agreed, smiling.

“Ooh, ooh, babe, look at that one!” His voice was full of energy, like always, and you turned to see what he was talking about. Instead of a star, you saw that he made a heart with his fingers, and you burst out into laugher.

“You’re so cute, oh my gosh,” you said, peppering his face in kisses. He immediately blushed, and for a moment, he was stunned. Quickly after, his face broke out into a large, goofy smile, and he kissed you all over your face in return.

#ugh im so sorry this is so short #morosis's valentine's day event 💖#morosis matchups #haikyuu fluff #nishinoya x reader #nishinoya yū #nishinoya scenarios

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inkedstarlight · 4 years ago

Text

Bittersweet: Chapter Nine

Summary: Cassian and Nesta finally meet. Officially, this time. Let the romance commence. Notes: Read it here on AO3! Warnings: very brief/non-explicit mention of sexual assault Bittersweet Masterlist

“Earth to Nesta?”

Nesta snapped from her trance to see Emerie waving a hand in front of her face.

“You’ve been cleaning the same spot for a good ten minutes,” Emerie gestured to where Nesta was scrubbing the counter with a towel. It was squeaky clean.

Nesta let go of the towel and cleared her throat. “My bad.”

Emerie pulled out the chair on the other side of the counter and sat down. It was eleven in the evening on a Monday, and they had just closed. The only other person in Rita’s was Lucien, and he was doing dishes in the back.

“You’ve been acting weird for the past two weeks,” Emerie stated blatantly. Her stare was unwavering. “And you’ve lost at least ten pounds.”

The incidence with Tomas happened two weeks ago. Nesta was doing a pretty good job of moving on with her life all things considered. She felt like shit, but she hadn’t missed a single shift at work. That had to count for something.

But she should’ve known Emerie would notice. She was like a fucking hawk, that girl. She saw everything.

When Nesta didn’t say anything, Emerie shrugged and got up from the stool. “At least try a little harder,” she said, referring to the coworkers’ challenge to get the most tips. She shot Nesta a sad look. “Thesan is beating you. Thesan.”

Nesta mustered a laugh. Thesan wasn’t great with customers, that was common knowledge. Neither Emerie nor Nesta were people persons, but they knew how to turn it on for customers. Thesan, on the other hand, didn’t make much of an effort. It wasn’t that he was intentionally rude, the guy was just quiet in nature. In fact, he was quite a sweetheart.

Which was why it was quite entertaining to watch Thesan and Helion interact. Where Thesan was an introvert, Helion was loud as hell. Not to mention it was clear that Thesan was crushing on him. But unfortunately, Helion flirted with every living, breathing thing and was thus completely oblivious. During Nesta’s first week at Rita’s, Emerie had spilled all the tea about their coworkers. Thesan was head over heels in love with Helion, Helion had never been in a monogamous relationship, and Viviane… well, Viviane had her own little love story. A complicated one at that.

His name was Kallias. They grew up together, from scheming little kids to rebellious teenagers to young adults. Best friends since they could remember.

Because Emerie grew up in the same small town as them, she knew everything. They all went to school together. She knew that Kallias had been in love with Viviane since freshman year of high school. She knew that Viviane felt the same way, but she would never admit it thanks to the hell she was put through during her childhood. Nesta didn’t know the specifics, and she never asked.

It also didn’t help that Viviane was in a relationship with someone else. They’d been together for almost two years. Emerie thought Viviane deserved better, that he wasn’t a very good person.

Anyway, Kallias visited Rita’s nearly every weekend after his shift at the fire station to grab a drink and more importantly, see Viviane.

Nesta thought it was ridiculous. She’d told Emerie as much when she’d brought Nesta up to date on their coworkers’ lives. Why wouldn’t they just admit they loved each other and get on with it already? It was pretty fucking simple; they were just making it complicated for themselves. Emerie wholeheartedly agreed and the pair then went on an hour long rant on the idiocy of romantic relationships.

And if she was being honest, Nesta didn’t care much about these people. Sure, they were respectable but they were a temporary fixture in her life. Once she secured a job in her career field, she was going to leave them all behind.

“We should get a drink sometime. Outside of work,” Emerie clarified with a look of disgust. “I’m sick of it here.”

Nesta knew that was a lie based on the relationship Emerie had with Rita and her wife. But she didn’t say that.

“Maybe,” Nesta responded distractedly, desperate to think of an excuse. It wasn’t that she didn’t like Emerie; no, Nesta liked her coworker. She just couldn’t muster the energy to go out with friends or socialize like that. “I’m pretty busy right now though.”

Emerie narrowed her eyes and scrutinized her.

“Stop analyzing me.”

“Don’t tell me what to do.”

Emerie sighed and receded. She hesitated before saying quietly, “Is… is this the part when I ask if you’re okay and we get all deep and explore a new level of our friendship?”

Nesta slowly met her friend’s gaze. They stared at one another for several moments.

Then, they burst out laughing.

-------------------------

The next morning, Nesta was brewing her third cup of coffee when Elain padded into the kitchen.

“Good morning,” Elain yawned as a greeting. She wore bunny slippers and an oversized hoodie. Elain only had one evening class on Tuesdays, so today was her only day - save for the weekend - to sleep in.

“Hey, kiddo.”

“How long have you been up?”

Nesta glanced at the clock. It was nine-thirty. She’d woken up at six after a sleepless night of tossing and turning.

But she simply shrugged instead. “Not long.”

Nesta poured the coffee into her mug, sitting back down at the counter. She watched as Elain bustled around the kitchen, scrambling eggs and slicing fruit. The morning light spilled through the dusty kitchen sink window, bars of sunshine reflecting off the tiled floors. Iroh basked in the sunspots, his black fur glistening as his chartreuse eyes blinked closed.

Elain and Nesta hadn’t spent much time together in the past couple weeks. It was Nesta’s doing, of course. She was actively avoiding her sister and everyone else. After Elain had tried to talk to Nesta after the whole thing with Tomas, she stopped asking Nesta if she was okay. Nesta assumed that Elain realized she wasn’t going to get an answer, that there wasn't really a point in trying.

But Gods, Nesta fucking missed her. And even though she wanted nothing more than to retreat to her bedroom as she sat there in the kitchen, she didn’t move from the chair.

You need them as much as they need you, her father’s voice echoed in her head.

Guilt stabbed at her chest.

“How’re classes going?” Nesta asked quietly. Elain looked at her over her shoulder with a surprised yet pleasant smile.

“Great! I’m so grateful to be at such a great college, but…” Elain bit her lip, hesitating. “My bio lab is going to be the death of me."

“You know you’re allowed to complain, right?”

Elain just gave her a smile. “Yeah, I know. It's just, considering where I was a year ago, I couldn't be happier to finally be enrolled in such a prestigious program. Even if that means the classes are brutal."

I wish I was like you. I take everything for granted.

“And have you made any friends?”

Elain had started school at Pryth U months ago and yet Nesta had no idea if she even had friends yet.

Selfish bitch.

A fond smile broke out on Elain’s face. “Yes, I have this really great group of friends: Lucien, Ressina, and Varian. It's just the four of us, but we've gotten really close.”

Nesta asked Elain more questions before excusing herself back to her room, claiming she was going to try to write today, to which Elain squealed and wished her luck.

Nesta hadn't written since their dad died. Prior to his death, she would write nearly every day. She'd been working on a novel for years. The plot had came to her in middle school, and it just grew from there. She'd never told anyone about it. Everyone knows how fucking hard it is to get your writing published, much less get high ratings. Nesta wasn't even sure if she was going to finish it. This was the longest she'd gone without writing or editing it. And she had a feeling that she wouldn't ever go back to it.

Dread filled her stomach as she thought of that prospect. What the fuck was she doing with her life?

Nesta’s phone buzzed, and she fished it out of her back pocket.

Incoming call from Feyre Archeron.

It kept buzzing, Nesta merely stared at her sister's name on her screen. She couldn't think of a single reason why Feyre would be calling. But she pressed "Accept" before it could go to voicemail.

“Hello?”

“Hey.”

Silence.

“Uh, what’s up?” Nesta asked. She collapsed onto her unmade bed. Iroh scampered past the door and jumped on the bed with her. He didn't waste a minute curling himself around her head.

"I was calling to see… maybe, I don’t know… uh, would you want to come to dinner tonight?”

I was not expecting that. And Nesta was about 95% sure this was Elain’s doing.

“Why?”

“I want you there," Feyre told her as if it were obvious.

“Why?” Nesta asked again. She hadn't seen Feyre since Thanksgiving despite her sister living just on the outskirts of the city.

That had been weeks ago.

“It's complicated," Feyre responded quietly. She seemed to pause before finding the words. "I've been so worried about Cassian, we all have. He'd never been deployed for that long - five months. It was scary. I guess I took that out on you. I don't know why..."

She drifted off. Nesta held her breath.

"I'm sure Elain told you, but he's home now. I've been more myself since he returned, and I want you to come to dinner. I… miss you.”

She rubbed her temple. “I don’t know, Feyre.”

I don't know if I can pretend to be okay for an entire night. I don't know if you even fucking want me there or if you just feel obligated. I don't know if I can be in the same room as your douchebag boyfriend. I don't know if I can be surrounded by your friends, most of whom seem to dislike me. I don't know if I can behave like a normal fucking person.

I don't know.

“Please?” The plea was soft, quiet. It was like she was almost desperate. But for what?

Nesta looked out the window where a blue jay - their dad's favorite bird - was perched on a bare tree branch. The leaves had long ago fallen, leaving the world naked and vulnerable. “Yeah, I’ll be there.”

-------------------------

Feyre embraced her with an awkward hug when Nesta and Elain walked into the house. Nesta patted her on the back lightly, uncomfortable with the physical touch. Luckily, no one else seemed incline to embrace her. Rhys actually seemed to make sure he was as far away as possible.

Elain, on the other hand, gave everyone a hug. Mor gave a laugh as she squeezed Elain back, Aurra watching them with a smile. Interestingly enough, when Elain greeted Azriel with a hug, his tanned cheeks glowed red. It was almost imperceptible, but Nesta noticed.

Feyre took a step back to assess her. Nesta could see the judgement in her sister's eyes as she took in Nesta's noticeably thinner body. Luckily, however, she wasn't given the chance to comment on it when Elain piped up, "Where's Cassian? Nesta still hasn't met him yet."

"He's running a bit late," Rhys answered, glancing down at his phone. "Should be here in about ten minutes."

Everyone began to make their way into the dining room and Nesta followed. However, she was quickly tugged to the side when Amren swooped in out of nowhere and basically dragged Nesta into the privacy of the hallway. She stopped, crossed her arms over her chest, and glared at Nesta.

“Where have you been?” Amren demanded.

"What do you mean?" Nesta asked, playing dumb.

She hadn't spoken to Amren in a long time, even though they had each others' numbers. Even though Amren had repeatedly texted her, asking to get coffee or go for a walk or something else of the sorts. All of which went unanswered.

Amren rolled her eyes, and Nesta was convinced they went to the back of her head for a good minute. "Don't play dumb with me, Nesta."

“I don’t know, working?"

"Is that a question?" Amren rose a deadly brow.

Nesta huffed and mirrored Amren's angry stance. "Why are you interrogating me?"

“Because you've been radio silent for weeks. I had to ask Elain if you were still fucking alive," Amren explained. Then, she leaned in close like she didn't want anyone to hear. "I was worried about you, you bitch."

Nesta let out a sigh. "I'm sorry, okay? I've been busy. I do want to hang out, it's just that..." she trailed off.

"What? It's just that what?"

Nesta stared at the floor, unable to form words.

"Nesta, are you okay?" Amren asked, her voice softer.

Just tell her. Fucking tell her.

I was almost raped.

Just the thought was enough to make Nesta want to puke. She couldn't, it was too much and she wouldn't even be able to fucking say it and it's her fault, all her fault.

She breathed in through her nose and looked back up at Amren. She shot her the most fake smile she'd ever given. "I'm good. Seriously, I just got busy. It won't happen again."

Nesta saw the skepticism in Amren's eyes. But she conceded with a small sigh. "Well, don't do it again, okay? I seriously thought you were fucking murdered or some shit."

Nesta just nodded. Amren looked at her once more before gesturing with her chin back to the dining room. Nesta followed her.

When they rounded the corner, she stopped dead in her tracks.

Because sitting next to Feyre was the man who had tried to break into her apartment.

“Nesta!" Feyre exclaimed, calling her over from where she sat. "This is Cassian. Cassian, this is my sister, Nesta.”

Nesta simply stared at him like a deer in headlights and he stared at her, his lips parted in surprise. He was wearing a grey sweater, his long hair hanging down, no longer in a bun like it was the last time. He tucked it behind one ear.

"Are you stalking me or something?" Nesta said incredulously.

"I could ask you the same," Cassian retorted cheekily.

Feyre looked between them, a confused expression written on her face. "Do you guys know each other or something?"

"Something like that," Nesta mumbled.

Everyone's eyes were on them as they waited for an answer.

"Well as everyone knows, I live in the same building as Nesta and Elain," Cassian explained, waving a hand to the two sisters. "The other night, I got stupid drunk with a friend. He drove me back to my place and me, drunk off my fucking ass, tried to get into their apartment thinking it was mine."

The entire room erupted into laughter, Rhys choking on his food and Azriel looking up as if reasoning with the Gods.

"So when Nesta opened the door," Cassian continued, "she nearly beat me to death with a baseball bat."

Another round of laughter.

"Overreact much?"

Everyone's eyes flew to where Nesta sat. They seemed shocked. Nesta was too.

She didn't know why she said it, why she let it bother her. He was just so fucking frustrating, even his mere presence.

Cassian stuck his tongue out at her.

Feyre interrupted, her jaw agape. "You guys are acting like children."

Nesta got quiet after that. The conversation continued, thankfully taking the attention off her. As everyone laughed and conversed, Cassian looked over at her. His smile disappeared when he met Nesta's gaze. She just stared back at him, lips in a thin line. He seemed to try to gauge her reaction carefully, but her face was blank.

And so the night went on. Nesta didn't say another word after what happened. She avoided eye contact with Cassian. Avoided conversation with everyone.

It was half past eight when they all began clearing their dishes. Mor, Aurra, Azriel, and Cassian were all gathered in the kitchen cleaning up. Feyre and Rhys had excused themselves. It was just Nesta and Elain who remained in the dining room.

“I need to go to the bathroom,” Nesta leaned over to whisper to Elain.

Elain nodded. "We'll head out right after, yeah?" She must've noticed the exhaustion in Nesta's face.

Nesta agreed, excusing herself from the table.

She walked down the hallway, peeking through every door to find the bathroom. She was about to push through a door on the left that was slightly cracked open when she heard voices coming from within.

“I’m worried about him. He’s not the same.” It was Feyre.

“He never is when he comes home, Feyre," Rhys said dejectedly. "It’s happened before. Cass just needs time.”

Cass.

Nesta tiptoed closer to the door, just enough for her to listen.

“No, what he needs is to see someone!”

“I’ve tried. He doesn’t want to go.”

“Try harder, Rhys!” Feyre cried, her tone frustrated.

“We can’t just force him to go, okay?”

“Are you seeing what I’m seeing? Do you even notice how lost your own fucking brother is? Do you even care?!”

Silence.

“Rhysand, I’m sorry. Gods, I’m so sorry. I know you care. More than anyone. I just… I don’t want to lose him.”

She heard them both breathing deeply.

“C’mere,” Rhys murmured. Nesta heard Feyre's footsteps as she presumably walked toward him.

“We’ll figure it out, okay?”

“Together.”

“Always, Feyre darling.”

They got quiet, probably embracing each other. Nesta crept away from their bedroom door and into the bathroom before they could find her.

------------------------------------

Elain and Nesta had just unlocked their apartment door when Nesta groaned. “Oh, shit, I forgot my wallet in the car." She fished around in her bag to make sure it wasn't in there. "I’ll be right back.”

"I'll leave the door unlocked," Elain called behind her as Nesta made her way to the elevator.

She stepped between the doors, hitting the button for the parking garage. Gods, she just wanted to go to sleep. The night had been exhausting.

After a minute or so, she was approaching her car. She unlocked her door and grabbed her wallet that was in the middle console when a pair of headlights flashed past her, a car pulling into the spot next to her.

Before panic could set in, Nesta recognized who was driver the car through the window.

Cassian.

His car turned off and he emerged from the driver's door just a moment later. He looked over where Nesta was clutching her wallet to her chest staring at him. He gave her a tight-lipped smile before turning away and walking towards the elevator. Nesta had no choice to follow.

She walked just a few feet behind him as they made their way to the elevator.

"I'm sorry," Cassian told her, his voice sincere. He cast a concerned glance her way. "For embarrassing you at dinner. And if I scared you that night."

"You didn't embarrass me," Nesta snapped at him. "You were just being annoying as hell."

His entire body seemed to relax at her insult. Cassian tried to hide his smirk but failed. "I'm glad to see you're still your normal, hotheaded self. You got me worried at dinner with your stoic behavior."

Now she really glared at him. "Don't talk like you know me. You don't."

"Oh, sweetheart," he teased. "I think we're more similar than you think."

She scoffed. "I think that hubris of yours will be your downfall."

"You know, it's quite sexy when you use literary devices to insult me," he joked.

Nesta froze.

Was he coming onto her? Chills ran down her spine when she thought of the last time a man expressed interest in her.

It's not the same, she tried to convince yourself. He's not Tomas.

Cassian must've expected a heated response to his comment because he looked surprised when Nesta simply stared straight ahead. She seemed to be in a world of her own, oblivious to everything around her. Any trace of anger was gone, replaced by a cool indifference.

Cassian's face fell. "Nesta, I didn't mean to - "

He was cut off as the elevator door dinged opened and Nesta swiftly walked out.

-------------------------------

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heavencollins · 4 years ago

Text

Top 10 Films of 2020: Part Two

And the last five of my top ten are...

5: Unpregnant, directed by Rachel Goldenberg and written by Rachel Goldenberg, Jennifer Kaytin Robinson, Jenni Hendriks, Ted Caplan, and Bill Parker.

This HBO Max Original was the tipping point for me actually purchasing HBO Max, and I haven’t regretted it since. Starring two absolute queens, Barbie Ferriera and Haley Lu Richardson, Unpregnant tells the story of a teenage girl who finds herself in a situation she wants nothing to do with: pregnancy. Her boyfriend informs her that the condom broke a few weeks ago but he didn’t tell her, which is fucked up in it’s own right, but that they should keep the baby and raise it and get married. Veronica, played by Richardson, quickly says no and runs to her old friend’s house; Bailey, played by Ferriera. Veronica learned that you cannot access abortions in her state without parental consent, so she makes a plan to roadtrip to New Mexico from Missouri to get an abortion that should be a human right.

Veronica and Bailey have been estranged for years, as Veronica became popular and Bailey fell into the realm of introvert, pothead, and nerd. But Bailey misses their friendship, and says yes to going on this road trip because she knows they’ll have time to grow close again. Throughout the road trip, the girls reminisce and become closer than they have before; Bailey revealing her sexuality, Veronica facing the reality of her shitty relationship and not-great friends, and the fact that chosen family is often better than real family.

The film is aggressively pro-choice and feminist, but also is a feel-great movie, not just good, but great. it made me both laugh and cry, as well as cheer on both characters. There’s a lot of really, really, really wholesome narrative within this and it’s a film targeted at teens for teens. It shows what a healthy relationship is and that no matter how different your best friend is from you, you’ll still have the same connection as always. I love this one.

4: Saint Frances, directed by Alex Thompson and written by Kelly O’Sullivan.

One of my favorite facts about this film is that the lead star wrote it, and she works as a team with the director, Alex Thompson, and is partners with him in life as well. Saint Frances focuses on a 30-something woman named Bridget who finds herself with no set path in life. She’s childless, sleeping around, has no real career other than waitressing, and doesn’t know what she wants to do with herself. Her friend recommends her as a nanny to a lesbian couple around her age who are having their second kid and need help with their six year old daughter, Frances.

Shortly before starting her job as Frances’ nanny, Bridget undergoes an abortion via pill, which means you bleed in the safety of your home and get to do it outside of the medical appointment. This plays heavily into the plot, as her periods end up being heavier than ever throughout the rest of the film and it becomes a slight joke between all of the characters. It also shows how little Bridget really cares for her own health, as she doesn’t think to go to the doctors at all and that it’s totally normal.

Frances helps Bridget grow up, as well as bringing her two mom’s together after the birth mother of the newborn suffers from extreme post-partum depression. Bridget and Frances end up becoming best friends, and it’s a truly touching film that feels like a home, if that makes sense. I could watch this again and again and never get sick of it. O’Sullivan and Thompson are a fantastic writer-director team.

3: Shirley, directed by Josephine Decker and written by Sarah Gubbins and Susan Scarf Merrell.

A movie about one of the greatest horror novelists and short story writers of all time set in Vermont starring Elisabeth Moss? Alright, I’m in. Shirley held very tightly in the number one spot until just this month, because it was that good. Moss plays Shirley Jackson, the horror writer we all know and love, and there’s something haunting about her.

While the story is highly fictionalized, with two characters being completely made up (the young couple played by Odessa Young and Logan Lerman), the film takes place right after Jackson published The Lottery and as she’s writing her next novel. Her husband, Stanley Hyman (played by Michael Stuhlbarg), is a professor at Bennington College and Jackson finds herself shying away from the stereotypical role of a faculty wife. She’s aloof, callous, straight up rude to the other wives and prefers to spend her time alone in her room, writing. Hyman prefers to cheat on her with younger woman and yell at Jackson for not being more social. This is most likely true to real life.

The young couple work as a mirror for Jackson, people she can project her novel onto and try to see how it will play out. It’s reflective of her writing style. This story is told with lavish cinematography and a score that reminds you of wind whipping between the trees, one of the best scores I’ve ever heard, actually, and it’s just lovely. Despite being mainly fictionalized with some truth sprinkled in, it’s by far Decker’s most palatable work for a wide audience (though I loved Madeline’s Madeline). I highly recommend this one to anyone.

2. Never Rarely Sometimes Always, directed and written by Eliza Hittman.

I’ve loved every single film that Hittman has put out, but this one is especially poignant in the current political climate. Abortions should be widely available, but sadly they aren’t and often teenagers have to travel to other state’s to have to have their procedure done without putting themselves in danger by telling their parents.

In Never Rarely Sometimes Always, two cousins go on a trip to New York City to procure an abortion procedure, not informing their parents beforehand. Except nothing goes to plan; they end up having to sleep in strange places, use all of their savings, and even steal portions of money from the grocery store they both work at. This film is quiet, sad, and real.

Perhaps the best scene in this is when the title comes into play. Anybody who has been to a physical appointment knows the questions they ask, but it’s especially nerve wracking when your body is at risk for something. The nurse asks questions, stating never, rarely, sometimes, or always after each. Skylar, played by Talia Ryder, starts to hesitate as the questions get more and more personal. And then she finally breaks down. It’s overwhelming and scary and she’s finally vulnerable for the first time in this entire movie.

While Unpregnant and Saint Frances provide more witty and funny tales about abortion and unwanted pregnancies, Never Rarely Sometimes Always gives a dark and gritty tale of what having no help in those situations can look like, ultimately putting yourself in the most dangerous situations possible to make the right choice for yourself.

1: Swallow, directed and written by Carlo Mirabella-Davis.

I don’t want to say much of this film because it’s something you truly have to experience. Hunter, a woman who finds herself pregnant with her rich husband’s child, finds herself having what can only be called abnormal food cravings. Except, what she eats isn’t necessarily food—she suffers from an extreme form of pica, causing her to eat everything from marbles to staples to little figurines. She proudly displays her collection on her desk, cleaning them off meticulously once she passes them. It’s a horror film but the horror isn’t necessarily in what she eats, it’s how she’s treated.

In fact, her eating habits are the one thing she has control over in her life until even that’s taken away from her. Her husband’s family doesn’t care about her—only the fetus she’s carrying. It’s a really good representation of an abusive husband that you don’t often see, because none of the abuse is physical, rather, emotional.

I can’t say anymore because then I’d be spoiling—all I have to say is go watch it. Please. It’s so amazing.

#films #top ten #2020 #swallow #never rarely sometimes always #eliza hittman #unpregnant #saint frances #shirley #elisabeth moss #film review #review

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