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simptasia · 4 years ago

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lost characters based solely on how i portray them in my text post memes

jack: constantly crying and/or screaming. no emotional stability. no social skills. terrible bedside manner. endearingly bland. into powerful women. loves the red sox... a lot. daddy issues. doesn’t believe in himself. has shitty tattoos. being crushed under the weight of everybody’s expectations. more or less hot. he is not cool at all. repressed attraction to guys. chronic hero syndrome. adorably embarrassing as a dad. passionately and violently overreacts to the mere concept of people believing in things. mansplains but in a non malicious way because he is literally that oblivious. gets into fights a lot. dissociates in mirrors. gets injured a lot but doesn’t wanna make a fuss. thinking about caves

kate: desperate need to protect women. bi. is frustrated by jack and sawyer’s personalities but wants to fuck them oh so much. rowdy. feminist. biceps. will call you out. is love with claire and jack and sun and- she has a lot of love to give. she can be ur angel or ur devil. exasperated. doesn’t understand astrology but she’s trying. she’s the slytherin friend every hufflepuff needs. uses guns. doesn’t know how to cook. go to relationship advice is “dump him” or “suck his dick”. just because you put things in her vagina doesn’t mean you know her. gemini

hurley: sad clown. haha laughter! hiding real pain! has debilitating mental illness. he’s doing his best to stay positive. virgin. genuinely kind soul. overwhelmed by food. awkward around girls he likes. much smarter and wiser than anybody thinks, including himself. a special boy who we all love. says dude a lot. the only valid rich person ever. doesn’t like himself. sees dead people. kinda silly. also he’s fat (but i don’t joke about it in a cruel way)

sawyer: compulsive need to nickname people. from the south. bewildered by charlie’s english slang. covering up vulnerability with jokes and being mean. loves juliet. is an asshole but a loveable asshole (this varies, mostly he’s an asshole). conventionally attractive to the point of boring. got a Thing going on with miles. can’t stand daniel being smart around him. babies freak him out. treats animals poorly

locke: very supportive and new agey type. i’ve made two jokes about him encouraging people to jack off, that wasn’t on purpose but Okay. he doesn’t know what its like to have friends. he says Deep Sounding but odd things. he’s super duper into nature. he suffers. he’s very forgiving of ben to the point of absurdity and he desperately wants ben to love and fuck him. or maybe they are fucking. Who Knows. he loves knifes

sayid: sexy, suffering shannon fucker. he doesn’t respect boone. his life is an endless parade of misery culminating in going on autopilot. respects women

jin: he has no idea what’s going on and his life revolves around sun

sun: beautiful. perfect. very passionate about gardening

claire: bi. frequently ignored. cutesy and sweet. super into astrology and new age stuff. her cheery demeanour can only hold on so long before she loses it. kinda dumb. has baby. vanilla, at least for now. loves charlie but is kinda frustrated by him. goes feral and “kitten thinks of murder all day” sums it up

charlie: that he needs attention and validation to survive would be a gross understatement. bi. trans. punk. stupid. english. really horny and slutty. adores music more than anything. drug addict (again, i refuse to be cruel). severe jealousy issues. inferiority superiority complex. hates himself but will get offended if you hate him. can’t take any form of criticism. is bewildered by sawyer’s american-isms. bit of a madonna whore complex. smol but will go the fuck off like a terrier nipping at ya heels. catholic and riddled with catholic guilt. goofy and obnoxious and he knows it. passive aggressive. terrified of bees. nice ass. mood swings. did i mention he’s short? anyway here’s wonderwall

ben: ugly. just plain terrible. beaten and bruised. seething with rage and pain on the inside. virgin. liar. just causes problems on purpose. resembles a lemur or rat, rodents in general. loves bunnies. doesn’t think sex is real. just a really bad idea for him to be around juliet. has no friends. doesn’t care about other people. says creepy shit just because. he knows he’s a terrible person. killed people. the friend nobody likes and a general nuisance to the other characters

(also my literal first text post meme about ben was a joke about him eating his parents??? 2014 sapphire, i wanna talk...)

juliet: mom friend. seems very calm but she’s screaming on the inside. basically she’s the This Is Fine meme. depressed. has big tits. low-key kinky. feminist in a very gentle way. has no ill will towards kate and will only fight her for fun. concerned for daniel’s well being. has no chemistry with jack. loves sawyer. flat measured calm way of speaking. she’s breaking apart at the seams but will offer you a nice glass of water :)))

michael: has a son..... uh...... enjoys minecraft?

(i’m sorry)

desmond: scottish. drinks. easily and constantly confused. magic psychic time powers, like visions and electromagnetic dimensional stuff. easily angered. fucked off by the concept of time and destiny in general. hhhhhhhot

smokey: Hello Fellow Humans I Promise This Is My Own Skin Haha

miles: bi. aro. loves money (trying to fill the hole in his heart with money and things). emo/punk. pretends not to care but he really does care. thinks emotions and romance are dumb but of course is emotional... and kinda wants love. but not that he LIKES you or anything. exasperated. thinks everybody else is weird. kinda slutty or at least trying to be. masochist and into BDSM. mean to daniel for no reason. daddy issues. resting bitch face. jaded, bitter and salty. responds to romantic things dan or char say with vulgar or mocking comments. grew up poor. can hear dead people. trying too hard to be edgy. deadpan snarker. Fuck Off I’m Not Sad Don’t Look At Me [cries only around the audience and his mom]

walt: becoming older than 10 was when things went downhill for him

shannon: seems vapid but is more than that. deeply insecure. feels she can’t do anything right. constantly put down as worthless by other people. yeah she’s sad but she Looks Great. wants sayid to pound her (mood)

(gee, that was dark)

richard: very old and ageless. sees ben as a son figure. really not holding it together. seems smart but he has no fucking idea whats going on. cult mindset. quips curtly back at miles’ vulgar jokes. in love with miles based on very little interaction. misses his dead wife. has a cute giggle. is also hot. overwhelmed and just wants to go into the jungle and scream

frank: doesn’t understand what anybody is talking about. the only normal person here. doesn’t understand these kids today with their weird kinks. just wants to sleep. pilot. bit of a conspiracy theorist

boone: bi. stupid. soaked in blood a lot. (L I T E R A L L Y all of my boone jokes are about him being dumb and bi and horribly injured and combos of those. i haven’t even made any incest jokes! what the actual fuck)

ana lucia: “[with tears in her eyes] DO U WANNA FIGHT??”. highly volatile. lesbian. bros with jack but will roast him. angery, sad and underloved

daniel: bi, agender, neurodivergent, just, just especially brain weird. The Scientist trope but kind of a shitty scientist. smart. in love with charlotte. in love with desmond. likes rats a lot. talks weird and soft spoken. withdrawn and polite but with bursts of bitterness. his mom won’t let him live the live he wants to live. time travel weirdness. loves music. gifted kid burn out. has a mental and emotional collapse. thinks a hydrogen bomb will solve all his problems. skinny. touches people a lot. he’s not okay. romantic. overwhelmed. memory problems. his lack of life experience and softness is used to contrast miles. takes some statements literally. pretty vanilla (for now) and doesn’t know what certain kinks are. likes that charlotte is Tough & Rowdy. doesn’t swear much. bad hair. was unhinged in college. has radiation poisoning

libby: neurodivergent and in love with hurley

eko: yeah... i’ve legit only used him for jokes where charlie says something EXTREMELY vulgar and eko says “go to church”

charlotte: bi, loud, passionate, beautiful, angery, knows All The Languages, huge nerd, loves daniel and thinks he’s a Snack, outspoken feminist, archaeologist/anthropologist and wants to explore some fucking ruins, The Lost Lenore trope, loves chocolate, exasperated, great smile, subtly insecure, doesn’t get that she could just tell daniel how she feels, has had many indiana jones like adventures (off screen, of course), for example: crashing her dirtbike into all 7 wonders of the world

danielle: french and unhinged, has seen some shit

alex: just a young lady with no chill

jacob: suffers from terminal apathy. has little understand of human behaviour. doesn’t care about people. he just plain sucks. has no endearing qualities. causes many problems. beats the shit outta richard. doesn’t like technology. so removed from humanity that he’s a touch uncanny valley

christian, eloise, charles and anthony jokes each have their own kind of flavours but fuck it, i’ll sum them all up as: contemptuous cunts who deserve to die

aaron: just a baby boy. does baby things. has like 5 parents

vincent: a dog. a good boy. does he know more than he lets on? is he mysterious? no, he is just a dog

#and as you can see this is 98% accurate #this is mostly just a summary of these people pfffttt #interjected with memes and orientation headcanons #i haven't made many jokes about sayid or sun or jin or michael #i haven't found them very dunkable #it's not like im avoiding them either #i just work with whatever joke sparks with me #anyways holy SHIT i make so many different kinds of jokes about charlie #you can tell the ones i favour making jokes about from this huh

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trb-reacts · 7 years ago

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The Raven Boys, Chapter 14

“When is Mom’s birthday?” Helen asked. Gansey was simultaneously pleased to hear her voice and annoyed to be bothered by something so trivial. For the most part, he and his sister got along well; Gansey siblings were a rare and complicated species, and they didn’t have to pretend to be something they weren’t around each other.

Umm, excuse you, Gansey. How dare you call your mom’s birthday trivial?? Also, I’m a little amused but glad to see that not all of my rich people stereotypes are coming up here. I expected all the siblings to be very cold with them *eyes at the Lynch brothers*, but that’s not the case and Gansey’s family seems pretty close with each other for most part?

(Except for the dad, of course, who threatened to remove Gansey from inheriting anything if he gets below a B)

But, yeah, I’m just glad that there’s at least some healthy sibling relationships around here.

“You’re the wedding planner,” Gansey said as a dog ripped out of nowhere. It barked furiously, trying to bite the Camaro’s tires.

Lol, I don’t know why with the way this is written, I’m beginning to think that Gansey’s car tires is made of rich people leather and that’s why the dog all of sudden just raised its head, went idk STEAK! and just ripped outta nowhere towards Gansey’s car tires. Also I’m amused because I just recall Gansey’s car is named the Pig, I think, which… makes sense why the dog is going after it?

Helen did not need to be anything. She didn’t have careers, she had hobbies that involved other people’s lives.

Oh, now that definitely sounds more like a rich person thing. She didn’t have careers, she had a fortune of old money to live off of. Oh wait, that’s not what it said? I think that’s just my bitterness towards these rich families coming out. Gee, how does Adam ever stand them?

Also, She didn’t have careers, she had hobbies that involved other people’s live, sounds like such a bored married housewife would nothing to do thing, like, uh, I have nothing to do ever since I don’t work, so let’s just gossip and try to backseat drive your life.

In all honesty, I like Helen so far. The first thing she really called about is to ask about her mother’s birthday, which while shows that she does not remember, she at least cares?? And Gansey likes her, which is a nice vote of confidence in my book *just eyes at Ronan, my nonsecret fav in the book, and Adam, the sweetheart*. Yeah, so I don’t know why I’m kinda lowkey roasting her. I think I just don’t like too many hints of Old Money and Rich People, since I’m poor.

A lab mix tied in front of the first house bayed dolorously as he passed. The other dog continued to worry at his tires, a snarl ascending with the engine note.

Why does it seem like there’s so many dogs in this neighborhood, though I do very much love dogs.

Three kids in sleeveless shirts stood in one of the yards shooting milk jugs with BB guns; they shouted Hey, Hollywood! and affably aimed guns at the Pig’s tires. They pretended to hold phones by their ears. Gansey felt a peculiar stab at the three of them, their camaraderie, their belonging, products of their surroundings. He wasn’t sure if it was pity or envy. Everywhere was dust.

Oh, there was something about this scene. Three again, after the reading with Blue and Whelk last time, three kids. Gansey felt a peculiar stab at the three of them, their camaraderie, their belonging, products of their surroundings. Like, it sounds very much like envy, except Gansey does have kinda these things among the raven boys. The only issue is that, well, life is never as simple for Gansey or the raven boys as it could be for these three random kids, since life is always complicated when old money and a circle of influential family is involved.

Also, just the ending of this paragraph. Everywhere was dust. Gansey couldn’t see clearly, just which one is which, envy and pity swirling together? Or was it a matter of showing how low these kids are compared to Gansey and his background, little specks that means nothing in the end, even if they have more - their camaraderie, their belonging, products of their surroundings - than Gansey thinks he can ever have.

“I’m going to see a friend.” “The mean one, or the white trash one?” “Helen.” She replied, “Sorry. I meant Captain Frigid or Trailer-Park Boy.”

I would say that I’m not sure if I should be amused or offended, but that would be a lie. I’m offended. Is this prejudice against people who’s not born into the same rich background as them? I’m very happy that my mind knew what was up and was roasting her even before this line came up.

Also, I think it’s kinda obvious by now, but Noah really isn’t actually part of the group. People refer to the boys as Gansey&Ronan&Adam. Noah is making very few appearances.

“Dad calls them worse things,” Helen said.

I’m sorry, darling, but that’s really no excuse. You can think for yourself, can’t you, instead of pointing fingers and saying, Well, as least I’m not as mean as him!

Somehow seeing his parents always reminded him of how little he’d accomplished, how similar he and Helen were, how many red ties he owned, how he was slowly growing up to be everything Ronan was afraid of becoming.

Oh, intriguing. How little he has accomplished. Low self-esteem or just the idea that his value depends on how much he has accomplished, though I understand that in this case, it probably came from his upbringing. How much red ties, I’m not sure what that means. I think I’m mostly intrigued by how he was slowly growing up to be everything Ronan was afraid of becoming, mostly because I’m wondering if Gansey is also afraid of becoming that rich white guy as well. And just, also, the idea that Ronan is afraid instead of hate, as though Ronan thinks his potential to be what he doesn’t want to be is very much there to turn potential to reality.

Fat, shiny carpenter bees swooped at his head, distracted from their work of destroying the stairs.

Bees… destroys stairs????

The idea that you had to pay for the beauty in Henrietta should have occurred to him before then, but it hadn’t. No matter how many times Adam told him he was foolish about money, he couldn’t seem to get any wiser about it.

Oh, Gansey, everything is paid in money, but you use it as easily as breathing. For some people, money is paid in breaths, in time, in huffs of breaths of toil and hours worked to accumulate for so little.

There is no spring here, Gansey realized, and the thought was unexpectedly grim.

This is a profound line, but I’m mostly thinking about how it’s April and still it feels like fucking winter. No spring indeed for me, this year. Metaphorically applies too, since this year sucks for me so far.

Adam’s knees bent as if he were going to scoot himself out from under the car, but then he didn’t.

Gansey knew what this meant, this failure to immediately come out from beneath the car, and anger and guilt drew his chest tight. The most frustrating thing about the Adam situation was that Gansey couldn’t control it. Not a single piece of it.

Oh, Adam. I don’t know if I want Adam to not come out because he doesn’t want Gansey to see that he is beat up for being caught after trying to sneak out, or because Adam is angry at Gansey. The former because Adam being so considerate just breaks my heart and the latter because I think Adam is the type to, in a very non-hyperbolic way, kill himself trying to help those he care about and I really want Adam to be able to… not exactly stand up for himself because Gansey doesn’t really bully Adam so much as ask him for stuff despite knowing it would be difficult for Adam, but at least be able to say no and be able to put himself before others on some occasions.

A bruise spread over his cheekbone, red and swelling as a galaxy. A darker one snaked over the bridge of his nose.

</3 oh, Adam.

“And what about when Glendower takes you away from Henrietta?” Gansey couldn’t say it wouldn’t happen. “You come with.”

Oh, and Adam says his faith in Gansey’s dream is incomplete. When he says, though I supposed it is incomplete, at least in Gansey. Adam didn’t think Gansey would take him with him.

Rags to riches isn’t a story anyone wants to hear until after it’s done.

Too true, too heartbreaking. Everyone wants to hear a ‘I preserve, worked hard and I succeeded, it paid off’. Who wants to hear a ‘and I’m still trying, with no success in sight’?

But it was a story that was hard to finish when Adam had missed school yet again. There was no happy ending without passing grades.

Don’t be so real, guys. Reality is setting in and this is not what I signed up for when I started reading this book.

And this was an uneasy place to be, because Gansey knew it took a lot for Adam to accept his reasons for chasing Glendower. Adam had plenty of reasons to be indifferent about Gansey’s nebulous anxiety, his questioning of why the universe had chosen him to be born to affluent parents, wondering if there was some greater purpose that he was alive.

The poor are sad they’re poor, Adam had once mused, and turns out the rich are sad they’re rich.

Sigh, the grass is always greener on the other side and I can imagine how much it sucks for Adam to see everything he ever wanted be in every other person’s hand, not because they earned it but because they were born with it. They have everything Adam ever wanted and still, they want more.

And Ronan had said, Hey, I’m rich, and it doesn’t bother me.

Except ‘growing up to be everything Ronan was afraid of becoming’, yeah, being rich doesn’t bother Ronan.

Success meant nothing to Adam if he hadn’t done it for himself.

I’m so proud of my son rn but also like, goddamnit Adam, let them help you a little. You don’t have to use connections for everything, but use the connection to get an opportunity to prove yourself, would you?

“You’ve watched too many cop shows.” “I’ve watched the evening news, Adam,”

Nice comeback, Gansey, mostly because i agree with him. This is one sad reality.

“Why don’t you let Ronan teach you to fight? He’s offered twice now. He means it.”

I did not expect to hear this, but now I’m just so happy and proud. Ronan, wanting Adam to be able to defend himself, and offers to teach him. Ronan, offering twice. I’m so happy.

“Because then he will kill me.” “I don’t follow.” Adam said, “He has a gun.”

Well, there goes my happiness out the door. Adam’s father sucks the life and happiness outta me and we haven’t actually even met him yet. Jesus.

Not at the double-wides in the foreground, but past them, to the flat, endless field with its tufts of dry grass. So many things survived here without really living.

But… can I say ‘but they survive.’ Not living, but still, they survive. And if they survive long enough, they can transfer to a better environment where they can thrive.

“It means I never get to be my own person. If I let you cover for me, then I’m yours. I’m his now, and then I’ll be yours.”

Yes and no. Yes, because I can see where Adam is coming, I really can, but… there’s a difference between receiving some help and owing someone so much that you owe them everything. But at the same time, I don’t think it’s ever about the degree of help Gansey exert, more like the more helpful the help was to Adam, the more Adam feels like he will owe, even if Gansey’s help might really involve an effortless phone call that would get Adam an interview for a job.

Some days, all that grounded him was the knowledge that his and Adam’s friendship existed in a place that money couldn’t influence.

Gansey, I don’t think you could ever say this so long as you and Adam’s social and monetary status is so different. You can probably say this about you and Ronan, but you’re naive if you thought so between you and Adam.

“You don’t know how it makes people look at me and at you. It’s all they need to know about us. They’ll think I’m your monkey.“

Ouch. Just.. ouch.

I am only my money. It is all anyone sees, even Adam.

You’re not only your money, Gansey, but that is a huge part of you. Adam is admittedly bothered by the glaring money part of you that stares him in the face all the time.

“You’re as bad as her. You think you deserve it.”

Who’s her? Adam’s mom?

“Don’t pretend you know,” he said. “Don’t come here and pretend you know anything.” Gansey told himself to walk away. To say nothing else. Then he said, “Don’t pretend you have anything to be proud of, then.”

Oh Gansey, have you ever thought that it is exactly because Adam has nothing to be proud of that he clings onto his pride, the fact that everything he has is because he earned it, because there is nothing else. He is building from bottom up, and it is true, people only want to hear stories of rag to riches. Would you have said the same, would you have been able to say those words, Gansey, if Adam already became rich?

As soon as he said it, he knew that it wasn’t fair, or even if it had been fair, it wasn’t right. But he wasn’t sorry he’d said it.

I would like to condemn Gansey, but… he is just awfully human, contradictory and acting on emotions and all. I can’t blame him, even if he shouldn’t have said it. The rich have their rich problem, the poor has theirs.

He imagined coming here one day and finding that Adam wasn’t here, but in the hospital, or worse, that Adam was here, but that something important had been beaten out of him.

His pride or his life, Gansey, because I think you just tried to beat Adam’s pride out of him to save his life. And I’m not sure if that was for the better.

… okay, I guess I’m not that forgiving towards Gansey. I can relate to Adam better, from one poor person to the other.

Gansey could see his irises moving underneath the thin skin of his eyelids, a dreamer awake.

a dreamer awake, it said. Oh, this is so heartbreaking. Just… an optimist that had life lessons beaten into it one time too many for him to not turn into a realistic. And real life is that it is hard, it sucks, it’s not fair and not everyone would get what they deserve, even if they try.

Now Adam looked at Gansey. There was something fierce and chilling in his eyes, an unnamable something that Gansey was always afraid would eventually take over completely. This, he knew, was a compromise, a risky gift that he could choose to reject.

In which Gansey asks for too much and when he learned to stop asking because he realize it costs Adam too much, Adam offers because… he’s Adam and Gansey is his friend.

Adam’s breath stopped audibly. Through the windshield, Gansey met the eyes of Adam’s father.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuckafkaslfdjgfkldfj. The price is high, so high. Adam, I know you said you need to return by 10, but please don’t. Please. Move in with Gansey, Ronan and Noah, finish up your college degree, get a good job, be successful, be happy. Don’t go back.

Aaaand, we’ve come to the end of this chapter. What can I say besides too much had happened and emotions and risks run high. Next stop, back to Blue.

#the raven boys #the raven cycle #chapter 14 #trb #trc

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aisle9-blog · 6 years ago

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TRUTH

It was 1978. Staying alive was the number movie at the box office and The Bee Gees song “Night Fever” topped the charts. I was thirteen years old. I’d been a boy scout for two of those years.

My dad was a pretty busy guy. He’d signed me up for the scouts so I could learn to handle the great outdoors. He knew he wouldn’t have the time to teach me.

Eight times yearly our troop went on overnight backpacking excursions. Most scouts went on half of those missions. I participated in every one.

As a result after only two years of scouting I had more field experience than most of the senior members of our troop.

Yearly our troop took a two week 100 mile back country backpacking trip. Scouting USA set the minimum age for this pack trip at 15. Nevertheless my dad signed me up. Our troop master pointed out my age saying I was too young to go. My dad pointed out my experience.

They went back and forth a few times. My dad ultimately convincing him to consult scouting USA. And they, after talking to us all and reviewing my experience, said I could go.

I was for some period of time the youngest scout to participate in the 100 mile afoot, afloat adventure. Perhaps I still am today... I’ve never bothered to check.

We all met the last three Saturdays before the trip to plan the route, break the necessary meals into patrol sized packets, and review the essentials that each scout should bring.

On the middle Saturday the scout master informed us, for insurance purposes, we’d have to have a physical. The exam would be conducted on that day, free of charge, by his son Bob who was a senior scout, and who was also in residency at a major medical university.

As you can imagine, there was a great deal of planning and work to done. And so while we prepared for the trip he called us into his room one by one for our exam.

Bob, our doctor for the day, and fellow scout, called us in one by one for our physical. He was in his late twenties. Tall. Dark hair. Very strong. A very competent outdoorsman. We all looked up to him in our own way. On this day he wore crisp blue scrubs and had a stethoscope around his neck.

It was a sunny day. The shades were drawn in his room. He motioned me to sit on the side of his bed as he explained the scope of the exam. It was a routine physical. Blood pressure. Listen to the heart and lungs. Check the lymph nodes, and check for a hernia. I’d been through the drill many times for sports.

I sat on the edge of his bed as he checked the boxes. Finally he asked me to drop my shorts and scoot forward on his bed. He sat on a stool in between my legs. He felt my lymph nodes for inflammation. Next he checked my testicles. Softly rolling each between his fingers. Then he softly grasped my penis, checking it’s head and underside. “You’ve got a nice looking penis Axel,” he said. “Had much chance to use it yet?” He added with a laugh.

“Not so much,” I stammered... more than a little embarrassed. “Oh... don’t worry you will.” I doubted he knew how much I wanted to. There was this girl named Lori who’d made herself the object of my masturbation fantasies by reaching up my shorts and grabbing it when we were swimming in the pool at the park one day. But beyond that my experience was solely with my right hand... with whom I’d racked up a lot of flight hours.

He looked up at me, applying lubricant to his finger. Ok, one more thing, I’m just going to insert my finger to make sure you don’t have a hernia. I nodded, indicating my familiarity with the procedure... although no one had ever done it with me facing them. Where should I look?

It made me a little nervous. He put his left hand softly on my leg and told me to relax. Then he softly lifted my scrotum out of his way. His finger slid into. He asked if everything was ok. I looked down at him and nodded yes. The he had me cough... and cough again. All normal stuff I was accustomed to.

He started to slowly and gently move his finger inside of me. It felt like he was making a swirling motion. This was different. I started to feel warm. “I’m just looking for any abnormal sensitivity here,” he told me. The swirling continued.

Abnormal sensitivity? I couldn’t imagine what abnormal sensitivity would be. Because everything was feeling sensitive. It was a really intense feeling and I found myself involuntarily pushing down into his hand.

“Do you feel any... ” he stopped mid sentence. “Ah yeah... I guess you do.” I looked down and was mortified. I had quickly developed a tremendous erection that was arching up towards his face. He read my embarrassment and smiled at me. “Don’t worry. It’s totally normal.”

That sort of put me at ease for a moment or two, but my ease of mood was to be short lived because a larger problem was building. I was still a virgin but I’d had enough experience to know when an orgasm was on it’s way.

Getting a rod was one thing. There was no way I could live down cumming all over the scout that everyone looked up to.

So many sensations. I had a hard time speaking.

I was pushing down onto his hand involuntarily. His finger kept swirling inside of me. I didn’t really want him to stop. But if he didn’t...

“Uhhh... Bob, you might want to stop.” I weakly said. He looked up, concerned. “Why, is it hurting?” He asked. “Ah... no... pain is not the problem.” How to subtly explain to a guy giving you an exam that you’re about to cum in his face?

“What’s wrong?” He asked. “Ummm. It’s just that...” I paused in embarrassment. I was running out of time. That magical finger kept swirling. My erection was so strong I could smash a coconut with it. Finally I could take no more. “If you don’t stop I’m gonna cum!”

He didn’t stop. That swirling finger kept on with it’s wonderful swirling. I pressed down hard onto it, Bob reached deep inside me and I fell over the edge, ejaculating vigorously. I watched as my first shot coated his face. And then Bob the expert Boy Scout / medical student blew my mind. In the midst of my orgasm he took my cock into his mouth. What a sensation! I laid my head back and took the ride. I came and came and came. I couldn’t breathe. My muscles so tense I started to cramp. It was like he was sucking me inside out.

When my spasms stopped Bob slowly released me into the cold. The sensations hadn’t entirely subsided. It was at least a full two minutes before my breathing returned to normal and I opened my eyes. I looked down. My cum was everywhere. On his face. My shirt and legs. On the wood floor.

He stood up his scrubs tented out wildly in front of him. A large wet stain at it’s apex. “Do you mind if I...” I didn’t say anything. He loosened the tie at the front of the scrubs and released his hard penis.

It was the first erection I’d ever seen, besides my own of course. It was a mans cock. Big and thick and heavily veined. He applied more lube to his hand and started to slowly stroke it. As he did so he described in hushed terms what it felt like inside of me.

I watched intently. Fascinated by the way his uncircumcised foreskin slid over the head of his penis. The sound of his hand as it slid over his shaft. He was quietly moaning and he started to slowly thrust his hips. Drops formed at the tip of his penis. He balls pulled up tight against him.

It was quite a thing to witness. I was hard again.

He looked over at my erection. “Oh to be a teenager again,” he said, lust in his eyes. I grasped my penis and started to stroke myself. Looking up as I did so to make sure it was ok. He encouraged me by nodding.The speed of his hand and thrusting increased. I matched it. His gaze fixed on my crotch. A minute later he turned towards me, closed his eyes, grunted, and came. I watched as it poured onto my legs, over my erection, and the floor mixing with my earlier contribution.

My vision tunneled. There was nothing on earth at that moment but his cock, his cum dripping on me, and my hand cranking my erection. The air was sucked out of the room. I came again. Hard!

There was a long silence. I opened my eyes. He was looking at me. “Wow! You’re a fucking damn sexy kid! You really blew my mind right there,” he said.

To be completely honest, I wasn’t sure exactly what had happened. Except that I’d embarrassed myself by having an orgasm in the middle of an exam.

“Look... I’m sorry,” I started to sheepishly explain, “I couldn’t help it.” He laughed. “That was exactly what I hoped would happen... even more than I hoped would happen.” He looked over at me, a little concern showing, “You’re ok with all that... right?” “I mean you don’t feel that I forced you...”

This was a different era. Before the internet. Before cable tv. the stories of the scandals that rocked the Catholic Church. Before people were told what to think about... everything.

I thought for a moment. It didn’t seem like a big deal to me. In fact, I rather enjoyed it.

But it was a big deal in the following way. It was the first time I’d come face to face with the warnings of others and found them to be void of fact. This was homosexual sex. There was no excuse. No rationalizing it. No way around it. If reality followed the script I would become feminine and lose my values now.

But... the sky didn’t fall. I didn’t suddenly develop a lisp, want to join the communist party... or grow hair on my palms.

What I uncovered was all those “experts” who’d been warning us of the evils of gay sex... (well, really men on men - because two women fucking was more than ok), didn’t know what they were talking about.

Or frequently worse, it was a case of “we hate in others that which we most hate in ourselves”.

Of the times I’ve told this story very few have taken it for what it was... an experience. Most tell me I was abused. I wasn’t. Certainly some who’ve had such an experience were. They were afraid, and wanted it to stop. Neither was true of me.

What the experience ultimately taught me was how dangerous it is to let someone limit your field of thought into binaries.

Bob and I fucked for two years afterwards. And when I say fucked I mean it. We would sneak off on when we were on scout trips and suck each other off in the woods. And in between trips, when we were home and had more time, he would put that big thick cock of his in my ass frequently. And I loved every minute of it.

We are friends to this day.

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