#my cold seems to be ending after 4 days (5 tomorrow)

[yoohyeon]

I barely slept today and I feel like I won’t be able to sleep again tonight cause my nose is BURNING

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Forevermore

Happily Ever After, here we are. This is part 20 of 20... The End.

Tale of the Cursed Raven: Part 1 I Part 2I Part 3 I Part 4 I Part 5 I Part 6 I Part 7 I Part 8 | Part 9 I Part 10 I Part 11 I Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19

The Mostro Lounge after hours is a shadow of itself in the daytime. With the lights turned down and the area empty, it transforms from a classy jazz bar to a lonely cavern, twisting with strange shapes. The sea overlooks it, coloring the lounge a lonely deep blue.

A cackling laugh rings out.

“Ahahahahah!! Jade got stood up,” Floyd sputters, pounding a fist on a table. He has a glass of juice in hand, has been chugging shot after shot of it to power his giggles. "What a loser!!"

“Floyd, you’re being so rude,” Azul sighs—though he is fighting a smirk. “Perhaps Jade is simply not as desirable as he might believe he is. We cannot fault him for that."

Jade, sandwiched between his twin and his dorm leader, wears a tight smile. "I am glad to see you two are being so very supportive of me during my time of emotional crisis," he says sardonically. “Where would I be without you?”

His biting comment doesn't stop Floyd from downing another glass of juice, from letting loose another round of laughter.

"She finally got her back at ’cha ya after you pushed her around for so long," Floyd teases. But he’s not on her side—no, not with that malicious jeer on his face. He knows his brother too well. “Oh, she is so dead.”

“I’m don’t want to be held liable for whatever stunt you decide to pull next,” Azul adds, quick with the reminder, “so be reasonable with your revenge, will you?

“I make no promises,” Jade says lightly. “I am very hurt by the what transpired. There’s no telling how far I may be driven to act on account of a broken heart.”

“Broken heart!!” Floyd gasps. In all his 17 years, he has never heard his twin make a claim more ridiculous. “Jade? Hahahahah!! More like hurt pride."

"More tea?" Azul offers, readying a pot. "To fill your cup and your 'broken heart'."

"My, you're so cruel to poor little me. Shikushiku, I'm being bullied so," Jade laments, rubbing at fake tears. "... But yes, more tea would be lovely. I could make do with a warm drink after being hung out to dry in that cold, bitter night."

"It's spring. It's not that cold," Floyd jabs.

"Oh, let him be a drama queen and air it all out." The tea is poured and slid to Jade. "Better that he do this now than during work hours."

Knock, knock, knock!

"... Now who could that be?" Azul wonders. He raises his voice so that it reaches outside. "The Mostro Lounge is closed for the day. If you wish to dine at our establishment, please consider coming back tomorrow afternoon..."

The knocking persists, louder and faster.

Azul opens his mouth to reiterate his message--but Floyd gets up and stomps over, yanking the door open.

"Didn't 'cha hear Azul the first time?" the eel growls. "He said to scram, or-- Oh." He abruptly stops. The anger he wears slowly morphs into a sly grin. "Oooooooh."

"Floyd? Who is it?" Azul demands. Then he, too, stops. "... Jade, I think you have a visitor."

He peers up from the rim of his teacup.

There, peeking out from between Floyd and Azul, is a small girl in pigtails and a feathered shawl. A very, very familiar girl.

Jade sets his drink down and rises to his feet. "Miss Raven?"

His dorm leader glances at Floyd, seizing him by the arm. "Dear me! It seems I've forgotten to run some payroll calculations! I'll need your assistance with that, Floyd. Come, to my office."

"Eeeeh? But I wanna stick around and wa--"

"My office," Azul presses. His grip is a powerful vice on Floyd. "NOW."

The octopus drags his subordinate off. They disappear down a corridor, but Jade knows they’re lingering behind the wall, ears pressed to it. He tuts and shakes his head. At them, at the raven that has found its way to him.

“… Welcome to the Mostro Lounge,” Jade recites, bending onto a bow. He speaks as though reading from a script. “Bar or booth, and how big is your party?”

“Hello,” Raven replies curtly. “Booth is fine. It’s just me today.”

He smirks. “Just you?”

“Well—” she falters. “Technically two, but the other person in my party is already seated.”

“Two it is then.” Jade indicates the table he sits at, and the seat beside him.

Raven carefully slides into it, but keeps about a person’s worth of distance from him. He remains where he is, respecting that boundary.

“Ordinarily, we would require a filled out punch card for a private consultation,” Jade attempts at a joke. It’s as dry as a cracker.

“For Azul-san, yes.” She folds her arms. “But you’re the one I wanted to see, not him.”

“Oya?” There is a thread of delight in his voice.

“Look." Raven hesitates, but she forces herself to swallow her pride. "I will speak plainly. You... have wronged me in the past. Lied to me, manipulated me, all for your own gain. In short, you're awful. Terrible. Absolutely THE WORST."

He does not disagree, does not profess guilt. Only smiles patiently.

A breath. "However, I have made missteps as well. I realize that you have attempted to approach me to make amends, yet I never paid any mind to them. I was so fixated on my own hurt, I shut myself off from the world and refused to listen to the calls that came from beyond my tower.

"I built up those walls. I locked the exit and threw out the key. I tamed a dragon to guard my tower. It felt safer to keep that distance than to push against it."

She produces an envelope and lays it on the table. Pale blue, ripped open. To My Dearest Raven scrawled on it.

Jade's eyes glimmer with recognition.

"There's still too many things that need to be said. I don't think there's enough time to get through them. At this point, I fear even an apology would not be sufficient. So..." Raven clears her throat and sticks out her hand--the bandaged one. "Let’s turn a new page and start over.”

Jade's brows scrunch together. "Miss Raven, surely you do not intend to..."

"Hello! My name is... Raven Crowley," she loudly announces. Her introduction bounces off the glass wall, fills the empty chairs and crevices of the lounge. "I am a first-year student in Class 1-A. I look forward to working with you!"

Jade stares at her, stunned at her aplomb. A moment skips by, then he chuckles, slipping his hand into hers and shaking.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss Raven. I am Jade Leech, second year in Class 2-E," he greets. "I also serve as the vice dorm leader of Octavinelle. Please do let me know if you are ever in need of any assistance. I would be more than happy to help you."

His hand, she notices, is far larger than hers. He could easily crush her poor fingers—but his touch is gentle, as if he is handling a glass slipper for a princess.

Her heart pounds.

She can’t do this, not again.

“I’m glad we were able to sort this out. Thank you for your understanding.” Raven grants him a papery smile. “Please give Azul-san and Floyd-san my regards, since they appear to be predisposed at the moment.”

She begins to retract her hand, and suddenly his grip hardens, assuming a strength she didn’t realize he is capable of. Pain lances through her nerves. Raven laughs anxiously.

“Erm… You can let go now?”

“I think not,” Jade insists. He has a predator's smile, the sharp ends of his teeth showing. "Is there anything else you wish to say to me, Miss Raven?"

"Th-That was all I wanted to say..."

"That is all? Have you anything to say for standing me up the other night?"

"N-No, I never intended for that to happen...! Something unexpected came up, so I couldn't make it as planned," Raven sputters, cheeks turning pink with shame.

"I was horribly hurt when you never appeared." Jade frowns, sorrow causing his voice to tremble. "You toyed with my feelings so cruelly. I can find it in myself to forgive you, should you look me in the eye and provide an apology."

"O-Okay, if that's what it takes to make you feel better and set things right..."

With great effort, she forces herself to stare at him. At Jade Leech. He's still every bit as handsome as he was before. A straight nose, wistful lips, clever cat-like eyes that slant up--not matching.

A beautiful liar.

A flurry of complicated feelings swarms her.

She visibly shakes.

"What is wrong, Miss Raven? You are looking at me with such a fearful gaze. Yes, the very same fearful gaze from our very first meeting."

His left eye--golden--shines eerily. When he talks it is low and hypnotic. Raven cannot find it in herself to tear away from them.

“Don’t be afraid. I want to help you.

"Shock the Heart.” 

“Eh…”

The light drains from her eyes.

Jade’s voice turns stern as he brings his face close to hers. “I will ask you a question, and you will answer honestly. Miss Raven, what exactly are your feelings towards me? Please state them very clearly and with your entire chest.”

Magic forces itself like a fisted arm down her throat. A harsh grip on her tongue, dredging up all the words she so often buries deep down. Her entire mouth feels like it is on fire.

“I-I…!”

Three words, eight letters.

They tumble so effortlessly from her.

The world stands still. It’s as though it, too, is in disbelief, freezing in its rotation to gasp.

No light. No sparkles. No poof.

But now she almost wants to go poof.

Raven goes from pink to scarlet. She covers her mouth with both hands and curls into a ball in the booth.

"Whoa, she said it--Black Pearly really, really said it," Floyd cries, poking his head out from his hiding place. “About time!!”

“F-Floyd…!” Azul hisses, appearing shortly after him. He pushes his glasses up. “T-To be clear, we were not eavesdropping! Not at all!! We just happened to finish our task and were returning to check up on you two.”

“Tsk, tsk… How naughty of you to interrupt this intimate moment between myself and Miss Raven.” Jade sounds disappointed, but he is grinning from ear to ear. “Fufufu, thank you for satisfying my curiosity.”

“Y-You…!!” Her voice revs up, squeaky as a dog’s chew toy. “You CHEATED!! You made me say something I wasn’t yet ready for…!”

“Oya?” He does not look the least bit apologetic about it. “What does it matter if I used less than conventional methods to arrive at the answer? In the end, the same results were achieved much more efficiently. And, on top of that…”

He reaches out and prods the tip of her nose.

“… I was able to see this charming reaction.”

“AHHHHHHHH, don’t remind me…!” Raven hides her burning face in her knees.

“Fufufufu. How adorable.”

Azul coughs stiffly, reminding them of his presence. “I think you fail to see the benefit of this move, Raven-san. It’s very benevolent of him.”

“What benefit?! Th-There is NOTHING beneficial about this situation unless you count Jade getting a sick kick out of this!!”

“My, that’s rather unkind of you to say. Amusing as it is, no. There is a real, tangible boon for you.” Azul taps at his temples. “Jade’s unique magic. Because he has used it on you once, he can no longer do so in the future.”

Her flaring temper cools for a few flickering seconds.

“Oh…”

He’s right.

Jade’s lip curls. “There. Isn’t that a weight off of your shoulders? Consider this my gift to you—reassurance that I will not be able to use Shock the Heart to pry other information out of you. As for what other underhanded tactics I may use… Fufu, well, I’m certain you can rely on your own best judgment to determine the truths and the lies.”

Raven glares at him. “You really are the worst.”

“Why, thank you.”

She angrily buries herself back in her knees. Jade looms over her, stroking her head and quietly fussing.

“Soooo…” Floyd scratches the back of his head. “Does this mean you guys’re gonna be a thing now? Like… a couple? You gonna make good-good eyes and make out now?”

“No way,” comes Raven’s muffled reply.

“Whaaat? But you basically confessed already. Quit bein’ stubborn.”

“I-It’s not stubbornness. I don’t feel like I’m… r-ready for that kind of a commitment!” Raven draws nervous circles on the booth cushions. “I’m still a newborn chick when it comes to m-matters of the heart… It’s embarrassing!!”

She takes a deep breath, then whispers, “B-Besides, I’m working on myself so I can be someone worthy of a love like that…”

“Bo~ring!” Floyd pouts, then turns to his twin with a much brighter tone. “Ne, ne, Jade~ Are you and Black Pearly gonna be together?”

“Don’t ask him just because you didn’t like my answer!!”

“Raven-san is correct,” Azul points out. “A couple it is not unless those involved mutually agree to the arrangement. Jade may say yes, but Raven-san may say no… thus annulling the terms.”

“Oh dear, what a predicament we find ourselves in.” Jade sighs, and he almost sounds tired. “There’s no helping it, I suppose. We must respect Miss Raven’s wishes. That is fine. As I said in my letter, a little black birdie once told me that I can be very patient. However, until the time comes when you feel you are ready to be fully embraced…”

She locks up.

Warm breath caresses her ear.

“How does this part go again?” Jade muses. “Ah, yes... And they lived happily ever after… The end.”

His mouth gently presses to her forehead. Soft, sweet, and smelling of the sea and the sky.

“W-What… a-awawawawah…” Raven goes from red to burgundy. Her ability to form sentences spirals downward.

“Oya, you’re quite flustered~”

“Wooow, they’re bein’ so mushy, Azul.” Floyd openly grimaces. “It’s kinda… gross.”

"Indeed, they are—and in front of onlookers.” Their dorm leader shrugs. “Shameless as it is, I do so love a happy ending.”

And it will remain as such, forevermore.

[justagalwhowrites]

Halcyon - Ch. 5: I've Never Been a Bad Influence a Day in My Life

You and Joel get closer as you put together your lists. A continuation of Halcyon from the prologue through Ch. 4, a modern no outbreak AU TLOU fic found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Masturbation, fantasy about P in V sex. Modern No Outbreak AU, No use of Y/N, Slow burn, 18+ only, Minors DNI

Length: 5K

AO3 | Main Master List | Prologue | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

October, 2022

“Why can’t I add to your list?” You pouted a little, can of hard seltzer in your hand as your float drifted to the middle of Joel’s pool. 

“Because you’re gonna just use that power for evil, not good,” Joel replied. 

“Would not!” You shoved off the side of the pool with your foot, floating back toward the middle of the water. 

“Am I allowed to put shit on your list?” He asked, sitting on the edge of the pool, his feet in the water and a beer in his hand. 

You scoffed. 

“Absolutely not.” 

“Well, there you go,” he shrugged. “Goes both ways.” 

“You’d be a dick about it!” You kicked the water in his direction but the spray of it fell short and you watched him try to not laugh. “You’d put things on there like ‘buy Joel beer for the rest of his life’ or ‘speak in a bad British accent for a week…’”

“Can you do a good British accent?” He asked, brows raised. 

“That is beside the point.” 

“What are you gonna add to my list, hm?” There was a teasing edge in his voice as he took a sip of beer. “Get a new wardrobe? Get Sarah a dog?” 

“OK, both of those are good additions,” you said, defensive. “But no, not what I was thinking.” 

“Then what, Goldie?” 

“Put in a hot tub,” you said, chin raised. 

He barked a laugh. 

“A hot tub?” 

“A hot tub,” you nodded. “How can I come over to your house and float in the water if it’s too cold to go in the pool? Which it will be in like… a few weeks. You need a hot tub.” 

“It’s already too cold,” he said. “That water’s below 70 degrees, couldn’t pay me to get in there now. Lucky I’m in this far as it is.” 

“See?” You said. “Hot tub.” 

“You’re ridiculous,” he shook his head. 

“If your list is shitty can I add to it?” 

“If you actually think my list is shitty we can discuss it,” he said. Your float drifted close to him and you were afraid, for a moment, that he was going to splash you. Instead, he just pushed the edge of it with his foot, sending you drifting back toward the middle of the water. “Still down to compare tomorrow night?” 

“Think so,” you said, taking a sip of your seltzer. “As long as you don’t mock me relentlessly for it.” 

“When do I not mock you relentlessly?” 

“Excellent point,” you said. “I should get better friends.” 

“Probably so.” 

“At least now you come with Sarah,” you sighed dramatically. “So I guess I’ll keep bugging you…” 

“God, you two are gonna kill me,” he said, trying to look serious but a hint of a smile on his lips. “Worst idea I ever had, lettin’ you two get to know each other…” 

You giggled a little at that. You and Sarah had become thick as thieves since you and Joel had reconnected now two weeks ago.

It was hard to believe that he’d only been back in your life less than a month. But then, it was hard to believe he’d ever been out of your life at all. You’d only gone a few days without seeing him since that night at the bar and, on those days, the two of you were almost constantly texting. It was the most natural thing in the world, having your life fall into step alongside Joel’s. It reminded you so much of high school even though you were in your 30s now, your lives moving in parallel until they collided at the end of the day and you came over for dinner or went and cheered on Sarah at her soccer game or Joel showed up at your door with beer. Even after all this time, he just knew you and you just knew him. You could read his posture as easily as a book, instantly knowing the kind of day he had by the way he opened the door or flopped on your couch. He seemed to be able to peer inside your mind on command, just a raised eyebrow or a sigh telling him everything he needed to know about how you were feeling and how to make it better. 

There was one day where you hadn’t intended to see him at all but it’d turned shitty and he just somehow picked up on it from the tone of your texts. New paperwork had come over from Gale’s attorney and you resigned yourself to spending the evening picking over the bones of your marriage with a bottle of wine and a wilted salad - because you definitely didn’t have the emotional energy to go by the grocery store - when Joel texted. It was a meme that you responded to with just an lol before going back to the paperwork. He FaceTimed just 30 seconds later and you frowned, answering it. 

“Hi?” You said brows raised. 

He nodded sagely. 

“What I thought,” he said. “You look like shit.” 

“Gee thanks.” 

He rolled his eyes. 

“For you you look like shit. What’s wrong.” 

You narrowed your eyes and he laughed. 

“What?” He asked

“How can you just tell?” You replied. “It’s weird.” 

“Come over,” he said instead of answering. He flipped his camera around and Sarah made a face, sticking her tongue out, her hair in two springy buns on the top of her head. 

You frowned. 

“Where are you?”

He turned the camera back around.

“Picking up pizza,” he said. “I’ll grab an extra cheese bread, come over.” 

“I’ve been drinking…” 

“We’ll pick you up,” he said. “Come over.” 

“Please?” Sarah jumped to try to get in the frame and Joel laughed, tilting the camera so she was visible. “It’ll be fun! OH! Spend the night! Come sleep over again, please?” 

Joel tilted the camera so he was back in the frame. 

“You really wanna disappoint my kid?” He asked. “C’mon.” 

“Yeah!” Sarah said, bouncing just out of frame again, just a bit of her bun appearing in the bottom corner as she jumped. “Don’t let down the kid, that’s just shitty.” 

“Hey,” Joel said but you could tell he was trying not to smile. She stopped bouncing. “Language.” 

“Sorry.” 

He turned his attention back to you. 

“Be there in 10,” he said. “Can’t let you just sit and wallow. Need pizza for that.” 

He and Sarah picked you up and Sarah insisted on cranking Taylor Swift in the car, signing Look What You Made Me Do into her water bottle in the back seat while you balanced warm pizza boxes on your lap, trying not to laugh when you and Joel exchanged glances at red lights. 

At dinner, you pulled a pepperoni off your slice of pizza and stuck it on the end of your nose and held very serious eye contact with Joel and Sarah as they spoke, nodding along carefully so as to not disturb the topping dangling from your face. Sarah tried very hard not to laugh and did a pretty good job of it until you made a face at her from across the table when Joel’s back was turned and she cackled, laughing so hard she almost knocked over her soda can.

“You bein’ a bad influence on my kid?” He asked when he handed you the paper towel you’d requested.

“Joel,” you said, deathly serious, pepperoni slice still on the tip of your nose. “I’ve never been a bad influence a day in my life.” 

 After dinner, as Joel did the dishes, you sat on the couch with Sarah and listened as she told you about one of her friends at school who hadn’t been as kind lately. You nodded along until Sarah seemed to run out of steam, slumping down against the cushion with a slightly tired look on her face. 

“Well,” you said. “Have you told her that you’ve been feeling hurt by how she’s been treating you lately?” 

She scrunched her face a little. 

“No,” she said. “But I thought that’d be pretty obvious…” 

You shrugged. 

“Sometimes it’s not. She may not even know she’s doing it. If I were you, I’d tell her that you’ve been feeling hurt and ask if she’s doing OK because it sounds like this is a change for her. If she’s hurting you that might be because her feelings are getting hurt somewhere else.” 

“I hadn’t thought of that,” she nodded a little. “That’s a good idea.”

“I do have those occasionally,” you said and she smiled a little at you. 

The three of you watched part of a movie before Sarah went to get ready for bed and you eavesdropped from the living room as Joel read to her in her room, the door opened just enough to hear when his voice changed with the characters. 

“Peeta sighs,” Joel said like Joel before his voice shifted to something that sounded more boyish but still strong and deep, almost what you remembered from when you first met him. You smiled. “'Well, there is this one girl. I’ve had a crush on her ever since I can remember. But I’m pretty sure she didn’t know I was alive until the reaping…’”

Joel flopped next to you on the couch when he was done and you held out your glass of wine. He took it, taking a big sip before handing it back. 

“You look tired,” you said, holding the glass. 

He shrugged. 

“No days off from this whole dad thing. Don’t really want a day off but still… get tired after a bit.” He looked over at you and smiled a little. “Thanks for talking with her. Think she needs someone like you around.” 

“Oh, someone who managed to tank her relationship and got stuck starting over in her 30s?” You asked. “That kind of someone?” 

He rolled his eyes. 

“A woman…” 

“Oh, is that all?”

He glared at you. 

“A woman,” he said again. “But one who’s lived some life, knows how to navigate the hard shit. One who’s willing to listen to her problems. She’s got me and Tommy for that but can’t help but feel like I’ve let her down by not giving her some kind of… I don’t fuckin’ know, feminine influence.” 

“Ahh yes, the mysterious feminine,” you nodded sagely. Joel picked up a pillow and smacked you in the stomach with it, making you laugh as you caught it and held it to yourself. “Joel, you’re doing great with her.” 

“Yeah?” He asked, serious now. 

“Yeah,” you said, serious, too. “You really are. She’s so lucky to have you, Joel. You have no idea.” 

“I’m lucky to have her,” he said, looking toward Sarah’s room for a moment before turning back to you. “So, you have the kind of bad day that you want to talk about it or the kind of bad day that you want to get fucked up about it?” 

“The latter.” 

“Then chug that wine,” he said, shoving himself off the couch. “And maybe change into your pajamas, I’m getting the tequila.” 

You swapped numbers with Sarah at breakfast the next day. You and Joel were both hung over and trying to pretend like you hadn’t been up until 2:30 on a work night getting hammered until you passed out in a heap on his couch only to be roused by a groggy Sarah at 7 in the morning. 

She’d taken to texting you then, sometimes just silly selfies, sometimes memes you didn’t really get, sometimes with questions about friends at school. You were pretty sure your heart melted the first time she called you Aunt Goldie, a sense of belonging wrapping around you that you’d never really known before. 

“We still on for tomorrow?” Joel asked, eyes following the slow, lazy path your float was making across his pool. “Make a night out of this whole project, kick things off right.” 

“Hell yeah,” you said, drifting back to Joel. He didn’t shove you back out to the water this time. “Did I tell you I’m seeing Anna for lunch? I cannot just go into that blind, I’ll need an out…” 

“She’s doin’ that well, huh?” Joel asked. 

“I don’t know,” you sighed. “She’s supposedly sticking with her program but… I feel like I should be a better sister and try to check in more but then it just feels like babysitting and that doesn’t seem right, either.” 

“At a certain point, she’s gotta do it on her own,” Joel said. “You’re her sister, not her mom.” 

“I know,” you nodded. “But I feel like I should have checked in on her more after our mom died. She was a teenager and I just left her alone…” 

“You were 20 years old,” Joel said gently. “Not like you were equipped for that shit.” 

You shrugged and took another drink. 

“Hey,” he said, nudging your float gently, just enough to make you look up at him. “Don’t be hard on yourself for that. You were handed a shit situation and you did what you could with it. Trust me, I know.” 

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Ended up in a similar boat with Tommy. Spent years - literal years - bailing his ass out of jail and begging him to get his shit together. Eventually he did a stint in the army and got it figured out. At least a bit. She’ll get there. But it’s not your job to get her there.” 

“Yeah,” you sighed. “You’re probably right.” 

“Who, me?” He asked, mocking. “Right? Never thought I’d see the day…” 

“Shove it,” you splashed at him, the water dripping down his face and soaking his t-shirt. You snorted as you watched him fight the urge to laugh. 

“Gonna pay for that,” he said, setting his beer down on the side of the pool and grabbing your float as you tried to paddle away. 

“No!” You shrieked and laughed, shoving your seltzer into the cupholder as more of you ended up in the cold pool water than you really wanted in your rush to escape. 

“You started it!” Joel was leaning precariously over the water now, trying to splash you again while keeping you from retreating. “Shoulda just kept those little hands to yourself…” 

“They’re not little!” 

He yanked your float back toward the side of the pool and nodded down at one of your hands.

“Freakishly small…” 

“Yours are just freakishly big you mutant!” You grabbed a fistful of his shirt and watched as he realized a second too late what was about to happen. 

“Oh shit,” his eyes went wide and you laughed in victory before you pulled him all the way into the pool, jeans and all. He brought you down as he went, the float capsizing and sending you and your mostly empty drink can into the cold water with a sharp yelp. 

You went under, the chlorine stinging your eyes as you twisted and tried to right yourself below the water. You and Joel surfaced at the same time, not even a foot apart and gasping for breath, laughing as you tried to brush your soaked hair back from your face. 

“It’s so cold!” You shivered and splashed at him before crossing your arms tightly over yourself. 

“Why are you complainin’ to me?” He shivered back. “You’re the one who wanted to be in the damn pool…” 

“In the floatie!” You said. “I was mostly dry until you got involved!” 

“Got justice you mean,” he said, reaching for your can and pulling it out of the water, dumping it out before setting it on the side of the pool. “You’re the one who put us in here…” 

“You’re the one who was being mean,” you said, reaching out for him and pressing your cold fingers to his chest, the heat of him still apparent even in the water. You sighed contentedly. “That’s better…” 

“Jesus, what are you, ice?” He griped, tugging you against him with a little yelp. “Gonna fuckin’ freeze to death if you’re not careful… ridiculous…” 

You giggled once but pressed yourself closer to him, soaking up his heat and pressing your cold fingers to his exposed skin. 

“OK, you could be less mean about it,” he said, pulling back from you just enough to scowl down at you. “Frozen fuckin’ hands…” 

You laughed and realized, very suddenly, how close you were to him. You weren’t sure the last time you’d been quite this close to him, the last time you could feel every line of him through his clothes, the last time his mouth had been that close to your own. Your heart sped up. His eyes searched yours and you could feel his breath on your skin and suddenly, you weren’t close enough to him. Not close enough at all. 

“Dad?” Sarah’s groggy voice called from the sliding glass door, making you jump, both of your heads turning toward her. Her face was scrunched and a curl had broken free of its braid, sticking straight out from the side of her head. “Is everything OK?” 

“Course it is, baby girl,” Joel frowned. “Why wouldn’t it be? What are you doin’ out of bed?”  

“You’re being loud,” she groaned. “You’re never loud.”  

“M’sorry kiddo,” Joel said, separating from you and working his way to the edge of the pool, pulling himself out of the water and dripping on the stone edge. “Gimme just a second to get Goldie out of the water before she freezes to death and dry her off, I’ll come tuck you in again in just a minute…” 

“Can I get another chapter?” She said it fast, the words all strung together, her eyes big. “Please? They just got into the arena and…” 

“We’ll see,” he said. “But only because it’s Friday and you’re sleeping over at Emma’s tomorrow so you won’t get one then. Inside, go on.” 

He watched her go and then went to the lounge chair at the side of the pool, getting the only towel he’d brought outside and holding it away from his body, spread open wide. 

“Hurry up, before I change my mind,” he said. 

“Such a gentleman,” you said, trying not to let your teeth chatter and trying to shove the ache that was still growing all hollow and wanting inside you down deep. You got out of the water and he wrapped you tightly in the towel, his arms going tightly around you. 

“Not really,” he said, pulling you back against his broad chest and squeezing you so the water from him soaked into the towel before he shook his shaggy curls over you so drops of water got all over your face as you laughed. “There, cured you of THAT notion…” 

“Thanks so much,” you said wryly as he released you. You turned to face him as he ran his fingers through his soaked hair and his shirt pulled up just enough that you caught a glimpse of the smooth flesh around his hips and you found yourself drifting closer to him again before you stopped yourself. Joel put his arms down and seemed to notice exactly where you were, just looking at you for a moment before he cleared his throat awkwardly. 

“I should go tuck Sarah back in,” he said. “Get into something dry so I don’t get her all soaked…” 

“Right,” you said, stepping back from him. “Sorry we woke your kid up because you just couldn’t leave well enough alone…” 

“I will throw your ass back in that pool,” he said, going to open the door for you. “Don’t try me.” 

“Oh don’t worry Miller,” you teased. “I know just what you’re capable of.” 

He started toward the stairs, a little trail of water in his wake as he went, and you watched the pull of the wet fabric of his shirt over his shoulders. You swallowed, hard.

“I’m just going to head out,” you said and he stopped, turning to frown at you. 

“You sure?” 

“Yeah,” you said. “Really should go wash this chlorine out of my hair. But see you tomorrow?” 

“With the list?” Joel asked. 

“With the list,” you answered. 

“Lookin’ forward to it,” he said, turning to go up the stairs again before looking back over his shoulder. “Drive safe, Goldie.” 

He didn’t wait for a response, just heading for his room. 

Your heart was still racing. 

You left the towel draped over the banister and just pulled on the oversized t-shirt you’d put in your bag before going to your car. 

You tried not to think about Joel as you drove home. 

It didn’t do you any good to think about him that way. It was Joel. He didn’t see you that way, drifting in that direction was what had ruined things so many years before. You’d just gotten him back, things were so good again, you felt like you belonged again, you couldn’t fuck that up, not because you’d never been able to move past a school girl crush. 

But you wanted to kiss him. Fuck, you wanted to kiss him. 

You tried not to think about kissing him. You tried not to think about what happened after the last time you’d kissed him. How quickly everything had dissolved, how you’d gone from picturing a future with Joel - a different one than you’d held in your mind outside of fantasy before - to running as far and as fast as you could in a matter of hours. 

It’s Goldie, he’d said then. It’s the worst thing that could happen, I wish it was anybody else…

You flinched at the memory, shoving it away. No, you didn’t think about that, not when you could help it. Just like you didn’t think about the way Joel’s lips felt against your skin, how his fingers - warm and think - had traced over you, how he made you feel so clearly seen and adored in a way that no one else had before, in a way your husband had never really seemed to. How he still made you feel that way. 

“Fuck,” you muttered to yourself as you parked, dropping your head to your steering wheel with a groan before you went in your house, closing your car door with a little too much force. 

You showered and forced yourself to keep your hands away from your aching slit. You were not going to fuck yourself in your bathroom to the idea of sleeping with your best friend. You weren’t. You weren’t a teenager anymore and you weren’t going to act like one. You were better than this.

Your hair was still damp when you gave up on getting any writing or grading done and went to bed, an almost frustrating, throbbing ache between your thighs. You stared at the ceiling in the dark for a while before you all but threw the covers off and rifled through your nightstand for the discreet little pink vibrator you’d bought years ago when you’d first figured out that, while your husband had many talents, making you come wasn’t one of them. 

You went to your usual fallback for porn but didn’t find anything that was really working for you, the ache of longing just getting worse as you gently toyed with your clit under the covers in the dark. Your cunt was slick, your wetness seeping down to your nightie and coating your fingers. It felt like forever that you’d been touching yourself and getting nowhere when the batteries on your vibrator died and you whimpered, kicking your legs down into your mattress in frustration. 

“Goddammit,” you moaned into your pillow, tossing your phone and vibrator aside, the ache in you worse than you’d ever really remembered it being before. There was no way you were going to be able to sleep like this, your whole body drawn tight and needy. You fumbled in your drawer for the charging cable and plugged the vibrator in before sighing and staring up at the ceiling again. 

Your thoughts drifted to Joel again. You couldn’t help it, he’d felt so good against you in the pool. He knew you so well, even after all this time. He kept your favorite snacks at his house and draped a blanket over you when you started getting cold when watching a movie. He was so funny and so handsome it hurt to look at him and he’d felt so fucking good.

Your fingers slipped between your legs again without really thinking about it, brushing against your swollen, sensitive clit. You resisted it for a moment, the idea of falling into the fantasy of you with Joel, but the need drawing everything inside you all tight and molten won. 

It swallowed you quickly once you gave in. 

The memory of him was there at the fore so fast, the way his lips had felt on you so many years ago. How you thought they’d feel against you now. His hands ranged over you, around your waist, down to your hips, his fingers twisting and knotting in the fabric there as he bunched it up to hold you firmer, reach you better. You moaned and rocked into your hand, sliding lower, your palm pressed against your sensitive nub as you slipped a finger inside yourself with a moan. You worked yourself open slowly, your slick making easy work of it, as you imagined it was his hand between your legs, his fingers sinking into you. How he’d take your swimsuit off and line his cock up with your entrance and push inside of you as he moaned your name. How his fingers would grip your flesh, prying at you as though he was trying to take you apart to keep pieces of you for himself. How he’d work himself so deep into you that you were certain no one else had ever come quite so close to climbing into another person’s skin before.  

You rocked your hips against your hand to the thought of him, not sure where memory ended and fantasy began, the fingers not plunging needily into your hole finding their way to your breast, grasping at the soft swell there, your own hand so unsatisfyingly small compared to his. You remembered the way his voice trembled as he breathed your name - his mouth against the tender skin at the base of your ear - as his cock filled you, the whole of him buried inside like he belonged there as he came. 

“Joel!” You gasped as your own orgasm hit, tight channel throbbing around the three fingers you’d managed to fit inside yourself, slick pooling in your palm and your tit filling your other hand. 

You came harder than you had in years, let alone from only using your hand and not your toy. It took you a few minutes to come down from the high of it, indulging in the fantasy of him in a way you hadn’t done since your freshman year of college. He last time you gave into it was back when you’d first started dating Gale but you’d felt so desperately alone, like no one had ever bothered to learn you at all. So you’d let yourself pretend that your best friend was still your best friend, that he loved you the way you loved him and that fucking you hadn’t been some mistake he’d made on prom night. It had seemed the most supreme extravagance, pretending that Joel would have wanted you to come like that with him. It still did. 

You put a stop to all that when Gale proposed, solidifying your relationship in an entirely new way. You tucked the memory of Joel and his body on and within yours away then. You’d never intended to think about him that way again. But then, you’d never intended to get divorced, either. 

“Fuck,” you sighed, shoving yourself out of bed to pee and clean up the mess you’d made of yourself. Before you lay back down, you opened the golden notebook on your bedside table and found the page with the list. You went to the bottom and tried to add another line but the pen in the elastic loop wouldn’t write. You groaned before fishing out the red pen you’d left in your nightstand from a night you were editing in bed from the top drawer. You added two words to the bottom of your list - trying to ignore the way the diamond of your engagement ring caught the light from your lamp, casting little rainbows on the paper - and circled them, pressing the pen into the paper harder than you really needed to. 

“There,” you said, capping the pen and dropping it on the notebook you hadn’t bothered to close. The pen rolled until it came to a stop, the red cap almost pointing to the newly added words as though they needed any more attention. 

That, you thought, was the solution. If you could just figure out how to accomplish that, you could put Joel back in that little box and keep this stupid crush from blowing up your whole life a second time, as long as you weren’t an idiot about it. 

You switched off the lamp and pulled your blankets tightly around yourself, trying to ignore the feeling that the words were glaring at you from their perch on your night stand. They blinked at you like neon behind your eyelids and you tried not to see them in the same way you tried not to think about Joel’s body on yours in the pool as you drifted off to sleep.

Get laid.

Next Chapter

A/N: I just adore these two. Honestly, they keep getting away from me, their conversations are so fun to write and explore that I get lost in what I'm trying to accomplish with a chapter. But that's OK! The ride is the point of this whole fic thing, right?

Thank you for being patient with this chapter! I got a bit sidetracked with another project but I think I'm in a good place to get back to my once a week updates here for a while. I hope it was at least somewhat worth the wait!

Thank you for being here! Love you!!

[sugar-omi]

I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAY N ITS FINALLY HERE WOOOO!!! i'm so insane abt this idea that you can prbly expect more of it...

DAY EIGHT — NEIGHBORS-WITH-BENEFITS

*kinktober masterlist | *ao3

tags : NSFW, gn + bottom reader, between step 3-4?, outdoor/beach sex, multiple choice dialogue, use of toys, bonus funny bit at the end <333

synopsis : you and cove don't get along like your parents hoped. at least.. not as friends.

you and cove can be around each other when hanging out with your friends or family, and exchange the occasional neighborly wave. but other than that, you can't stand each other.

but somehow you end up like this, time and time again.

with both of you exchanging horny gazes from across the room, suggestive or obscene gestures (sucking that popsicle so lewdly rewarded you, well cove actually, the best throat fucking of your life.)

or sneaking out to the others room because one of you sent a text to open the window or a nude...

and before you can think twice, cove is pushing you up against the nearest surface and kissing you breathless…

even though you can't stand how selfish he is half the time, and how he doesn't think things through and says and does whatever he wants… well you must not hate it that much since you've nearly ripped his shirt in half trying to get him naked.

or like that time you begrudgingly went with him to his mom's house to pick up his things, and fucked him in the car behind the gas station.

yeah, you definitely don't like him. you just.. like him sometimes. although sometimes, seems to be more like most of the time.. all the time…

but that's tomorrow y/n's problem. right now you're trying to keep your composure in front of all these people.

cove comes up behind you, pretending to grab some snacks from the table. but in actuality, he's whispering in your ear, his hand hot on your hip.

"follow me in 5 minutes…"

you tense, feeling a rush of adrenaline run through you. you nod, trying not to spill your drink.

then he disappears, fading into the crowd.

fuck, this man has ruined you.

that was the longest 5 minutes of your life, and you almost missed cove disappearing behind the lifeguard shed.

finally breaking free from your sister and cousin trying to keep you on the dance floor, you rush up the beach and try to find cove.

it's a bit hard since it's so dark out here, and you have to stop yourself from shouting when someone yanks you into a dark corner.

"shh, it's just me.." cove whispers.

you go to scold him for scaring you, but he pushes you up against the side of the building, his hips grinding into yours.

your head spins, you can feel his bulge through his shorts and his lips slot with yours, his tongue taking control of your mouth.

resigning that you can't tell him off, you bite his tongue, making him hiss and pull away.

"ow- what was that f-" cove's compliant is interrupted by your lips on his neck, your hands moving from his shoulders to grab his butt.

he groans, panting as you pull down his collar to leave more marks. "shit… don't.. leave marks…" he gasps out, his hands trembling on your shoulders.

you pull off his neck, a nice red hickey blooming on his collarbone. "why? y'know you left marks on me last time."

you got the most embarrassing talk of your life when your mom's saw the hickey under your jaw. keeping the secret of who left it didn't help either…

cove gasps, his breath shaking. "i-i told you i was sorry…"

you roll your eyes, tugging his tank top off. you don't know why he was wearing it anyway, you're at a beach party and cove never covers up, no matter how cold he is.

"shut up and fuck me before someone comes looking for us."

cove doesn't say anything, tugging down your shorts and underwear.

"fuck.. you actually wore it." cove says in disbelief, his fingers brushing against the vibrator inside you that he asked you to wear so he could control it, since you barred sex after the hickey scandal.

"well duh, didn't you get my text?" you ask, referring to the photo you sent him.

cove flushes, thinking. ".. i didn't charge my phone."

you roll your eyes, "you're so spacey. stop gaping, you asked for it so take it out and fuck me, holden."

cove grits his teeth, your eyes zeroing in on the veins in his hand and forearm.

he's too sexy for his own good…

cove's lips are on you before you can come back to reality, the kiss is messy and wet, your moans muffled by his eager lips.

begrudgingly, he breaks up the kiss and flips you around, falling to his knees and spreading your cheeks to get a full view of your hole, pulling out the vibe.

he can't help himself from leaning forward and licking at your hole, unable to resist how it clenched around nothing.

"ahh.." you breath out, pushing your ass back on cove's face.

fuck, as much as you'd love him to eat you out / rim you, you don't have time.

"hu-ohhh fuck.." his tongue dips into your hole, trying to scoop out your insides with his tongue. "hurry.. up!" you bark.

cove detaches himself from your sex, taking a condom from his pants pocket and hurrying to unbutton his shorts and rolling it over his dick.

he hisses, biting his lip.

he tried to get off by himself since you still sent him the occasional nude or dirty text. he even looked back at some of his favorite photos of you… but it's just not the same now that he's had you under him.

cove lines himself with your entrance, sinking easily into your wet insides.

you slap a hand over your mouth, muffins the loud moan about to burst from your throat.

cove's cock hits the deepest spot inside you, the vein on the underside of his dick pulsing and rubbing against a tender spot inside you.

your eyes roll back, and you close them, panting I to your hand.

even though you tried to get off by yourself. it wasn't the same as cove's dick. your fingers just didn't feel the same and the couple of toys you had hidden in your room aren't the same as his dick or when he controls your vibe…

cove's head rests between your shoulder blades, panting as he tries to wait for you to adjust.

you're so tight and warm around him, and he can't tell if it's because you haven't done it in awhile or because he missed this.

you lick your lips, swallowing. "move… c'mon.."

cove laughs breathily, strained if anything. "you're desperate…"

you bark at him, "you're the one who put it in in one thrust!"

cove doesn't say anything, holding your hips and removing his sweaty forehead from your back to watch his dick pull out your clingy hole, enjoying the way your hole wraps around him so nicely, almost not wanting to let go.

"yeah yeah…" he says dismissively, ignoring anymore bickering you're trying to start.

"hey, are you listeni-nnng!" your question turns into a moan. cove's tip slamming right against your g-spot.

cove huffs through his nose. the sound of skin against skin is too loud, someone would definitely try and find what's making that sound..

he wraps his arms around your waist, his lips against your shoulder, planting light kisses and nips but not leaving marks.

you gasp, sucking in air.

cove's thrust are more like a dog humping your leg, and as much as you want to make fun of him for being a horny bastard, you can't deny that you love how deep he is, and how he's never too far away.

"whaa- what are you…" you can't even finish the words out. his tip grinding against your willing insides and his hand coming around to stroke your dick / clit has you breathless.

"someone will hear.. just shhh." cove shushes you, tilting your head to face him, capturing your moans in a kiss, pushing them down with his tongue.

you feel irritated by the pressure building in your stomach. damn cove and damn him for making you be able to finish so quickly from doing half of nothing.

"are you..?" cove mutters, not straying too far from your lips.

you hum, trying to nod.

"me too…" and it's your turn to laugh. cove glares at you, a playful grin on his face and narrowed eyes. "what's so funny, huh?"

you press your lips together to stop from moaning, cove's hips grinding into yours. "cause- you're.. you're such a minute man…"

cove pulls you against his chest, your nails scraping down the side of the building. "me? i'm bot the one who came just from putting it in."

you bristle, "that's! that's because you were, ahh-"

cove mocks you, fake stuttering and he has a wicked smirk on his stupid face. "what? i finger blasted you and ate you out so good you came just from the tip? it was that good, huh."

you're so irritated by that damn smile on his face and his smug voice, but you can't deny it.

your parents went on a day trip and with your sister off at college, and cove's dad at the shop… it was too perfect to not have cove over.

and yeah, maybe you think about that day a lot but what does he know?

you go to bite back, you don't even know what you could say since he already exposed and roasted you with one comment.

but that dies on your tongue before the words can even come to you, cove's pace on your sex picking up, wanting you to finish first.

"that's it… just cum for me." cove groans, babbling a bit since you're not listening, one of your hands holding his scared forearm for support, your fingers and hole quivering as you near your end.

you hiss out his name, your legs shaking and if it wasn't for cove holding you up, you would fall into the sand.

cove groans, finishing soon after you, his fingers holding onto your waist tightly.

you both enjoy the afterglow for a bit before cove removes himself from your sweaty body, carefully pulling himself out from your hole.

cove kindly helps you get dressed, pulling your bottoms up your quivering legs.

but not before stuffing your vibrator back inside you and giving your butt a couple nice smacks with his fingers.

you scold him but he just laughs, stealing a kiss before he starts to part. "want me to drive you home?"

your eyes switch between his lips and his eyes before you shake your head. "gotta get back to liz an-"

"there you are!"

you both startle, whipping around to see your cousin running towards you, her and liz locked arm and arm. derek trails behind them, chatting animatedly with terri.

they're giggling, a bit tipsy. well, maybe more than a bit…

"what're you doing here?" lee asks in a sing-song voice, almost knowing. but you roll your eyes, she's more drunk than anything.

"nothing. cove was just wondering if i needed help pulling you off that poor guy you were latched onto earlier." you smirk, joking with your cousin.

"hey! jokes on you, i got his number!" lee announces triumphantly.

terri throws her arm around you and cove, startling you both again. "hey! let's stop and get burgers- liz's treat!"

"hey, why do i have to pay?"

terri laughs, dragging you and cove to the car with her hands locked with yours and cove's, swinging together. "cause you're the oldest, duh!"

cove goes to the kitchen, rubbing his hair with a towel.

he mindlessly floats about the kitchen, snagging a bit of everything his dad made.

he's humming happily, pouring a nice glass of juice in his favorite glass and turns with his winnings in hand.

"mm- oh!" cove startles, almost dropping his plate.

his dad was standing behind him, a stern look on his face and arms tightly folded. cove doesn't miss his fingers flexing and gripping his bicep.

"uh.. dad?"

"cove. what are those marks on your back." it's not a question, per say.. he knows what they are. he's just seeing if cove knows.

he swallows, cursing his carelessness that costed you get revenge.

"um.. dad, wait. i- i can explain?" cove shrugs, his lip curling up awkwardly. there is no explaining this away…

before either of them can say something, cove's phone beeps from its place on the counter, finally charged up.

both of them look at the phone and cove gulps, instinctively looking at his dad for his reaction…

Y/N: yesterday 6:37pm *see attachment* find me beforehand for the remote 💋

Y/N: today 1:49am *see attachment* i guess you can have your privileges back. cya soon holden;)

oh yeah.. you're both fucked.

[luvrsux]

“Sweet Treat”

word count: 3.9k

summary: you’re a professional baker and someone who you liked in your past, ace, is infatuated with your skills

contents: fluff

a/n: my bad for the over 4 month hiatus. so much has happened but pls don’t expect fanfics as frequently. i just wanted to post this because i missed writing 🤍

The day was as bright as a solar eclipse. The weather was just perfect that it’d wrap around your shoulders like a soft blanket on a cold winter day. The air brushed your scalp and behind your ears in just the right way—as you were speedily sprinting your way to work.

The “perfect” day would’ve been actually perfect if you hadn’t mistaken your day off for today instead of tomorrow. You would’ve been trotting along this very sidewalk, breathing in the fresh air and smiling at pedestrians with that sweet smile you’d use at your job—but no. Your lungs might as well be coming out your mouth with how much you’ve been hyperventilating.

To your rather small amount of luck, the bakery wasn’t far. It would’ve been a 10 minute walk but it turned into a 5 minute run which felt like eons. You lived in a rather compacted, populated city, so your body crashed and ran through innocent pedestrians, causing multitudes of ‘sorry!’ and ‘my bad!’

You finally met with the glass door of your small bakery you used your talents on. Your baking skills made this small bakery turn into one of the most famous ones in this city. Well, you and your equally amazing co-worker, Pudding.

You swung open the door with the last bit of energy you had left in you. Your legs were wobbling and the floor seemed to be as equally as comfortable as your bed. Pudding, who was wide eyed and holding a serving tray to serve the only table there. You gulped, trying to moisturize your dry throat from your heaving. You carved her an embarrassed smile while your eyes watched her serve the table.

“Pudding, I’m so so sorry! I thought today was Thursday” You excused and Pudding just absorbed it like a dry sponge. She murmured her polite gestures to the consumers after placing their desired order. You watched her brown big tails bob as she trotted towards you.

“No worries! I’m sure you’ll make it up to me by restocking any missing treats on the front desk” She smiled, a hint of sarcasm behind her chocolate eyes. You peered behind her shoulder to see more than half of the front glass missing. Pudding knew she could bake and stock but chose not to because that’s your job at the end of the day. You sighed.

“Of course. Write down anything I need to bake” You hang up your bag on the coat rack beside the door. Pudding smiled innocently and hummed but you knew it was fake. Pudding was black and white, and can easily go dark in a blink of an eye. Luckily, though, you two do get along rather well.

You walk past her to burst into the double doors leading into the sleek, silver kitchen. Everything was cleaned and freshened up, prepared for your talents. You washed your hands, pumping the bright colored soap gel into your palms and rubbed them together. You shook off your dewed hands and looked behind you to the steel table. A sticky note.

“Way ahead of me, I guess”

Your body moved mindlessly and aimlessly as you baked and baked and baked. A dozen lemon bars and fudge bars, A dozen and a half of croissants, some drizzled in chocolate and some with matcha, ten muffins of different flavors, refilling the large cookie jar, carrot cake cupcakes and macarons. Your apron was lathered with flour, chocolate and remanences of sweet filling. Despite all of that, you still had one more order to go. You threw the tin tray of unbaked strawberry cupcakes in the large oven.

The kitchen smelled entirely of sweet baked goods, and that may sound good but it made you nauseous. You needed to step out for fresh air, even the smell of coffee sounded better than all this yeast. You picked up the tray of now cooled cinnamon sugar muffins to stock up.

“I told you, we’re all out! Now leave!”

You heard puddings scratchy, angry voice even before bursting out the doors. There before her stood a tall, brunette guy with a smug grin. Seemed like the mere presence of this stranger irritated Pudding beyond belief. You blinked, tray in hand as you watched Pudding try to shoo off this customer.

“C’mon, you don’t have any in the kitchen or somethin’? I’m starving” His voice was like butter, as soft and smooth as the ones you’d plop into your mixture to make. Not only that but it was *awfully* familiar.

“Do I have to spell it out?” Pudding scrunched her nose up only to receive a hearty chuckle from the man himself. You took in a deep breath and quickly stood beside your angry pastry chef friend.

“Hey I just finished making these” You smiled. Pudding averted her angry expression to you, immediately softening up when she laid her agitated eyes on you. She made eye contact with the smoking muffins that were calling the attention of this person before her. “Don’t worry, I’ll handle this” You whispered.

Pudding pouted at the customer and strutted off, flipping one of her pigtails as a ‘fuck you’ while she snaked into the kitchen to most likely bake her anger out. You opened the glass fold to restock the section the cinnamon sugar muffins belonged and the guy before you widened his eyes.

“I knew they had some in the back!” He exclaimed, leaning over the desk to snatch one off the tray. You gasped and tried to retreat but stopped when you made eye contact with his face.

“I’ve been craving these since forever!” He took a hearty bite out of it, carefully unfolding the wrapping. You watched him chewed and chewed, his freckles lying upon his inflated cheeks. His eyes were closed shut, as if he was envisioning the flavors through his eyelids. He moaned like this was his last meal on Earth.

“Portgas Ace” You blurted. His trance was interrupted. He flickered his eyes open and stopped chewing momentarily. His sudden awkward eye contact caused your cheeks to flair out of sheer embarrassment.

“Oh I-… That’s your name right? I think we went to the same high school” You explained. He raised an eyebrow and swallowed. His expression then beamed once he recognized your face.

“Right, right! You were in the culinary club and you’d always make the best food! Uhhh (F/N), was it?” He snapped his fingers while he pondered. By now you were finished with restocking and the tray was tucked under your arm. You smiled.

“Yeah, that’s me! Everyone in the club hated you for always eating our food with your younger brother but personally I didn’t mind” You explained. You typed on the register for the amount of money Ace owed for his now bitten muffin he stole from you. “Made me appreciate my talents” You continued.

“I remember your cooking and baking were my favorite. My bad if I ever disrupted you or anything. Hey, did you make this?” He pointed at the muffin. The cinnamon sugar muffin is your own special recipe. It was the first baking recipe you learned on your own just by experimenting. You nodded bashfully.

“It’s my own recipe” You smiled. Ace blinked for a moment. No wonder he loved these things so much, he thought. “Anyway, your total is 2-“

“I want a dozen of these”

His request almost made you choke on your saliva. You blinked for a moment and realized that his request was almost the entire stock you had left. You opened your mouth agape to say something before he continued.

“I remember having one of these months ago before I moved and never forgot about em’. I’m going to a get together tonight and I need nothing but the best for the guests” He explained with a smile on his face, all while eating the muffin in his own hand.

Your temporary halt came to an end and you began rapidly typing in the register to calculate what it’ll all come to, including his own.

“26.55…” You murmur, still stunned that this one guy was so amazed by your recipe that he’d wanna buy a dozen. Not only for himself, though. For other people.

“Here” Ace’s fingers held a sleek card in between them to pay for his order. You took it, gently brushing your fingertips against his. You swiped his card to reveal a successful transaction for his sweets.

“Thanks, really” You saw, gushing like a little girl while giving his card back. Ace just chuckled upon taking it back. His smile was beaming and happy, like he had no care in the world.

“Keep makin’ those! I’ll be the ones keeping you in business just for those babies” He joked. You giggled, grabbing a dozen box for the muffins. The box was a soft pastel pink with white polka dots. The bakeries logo was printed on the middle in cursive. You placed each and every muffin delicately until all twelve were placed. You closed the box and stretched your arms to drop them into Aces hands.

“Thanks so much! I’ll be coming here more often”

Ace left with the pretty box in hand as well as a pretty smile plastered on his face like he just saw a unicorn. You watched in awe. Back in high school, you remember everyone having a gawking crush on the boy. He was attractive and tied every girl with a thread by their hearts just by his charm. You weren’t one of them, though. At least not like that.

When Ace would compliment your cooking, it’d warm your heart better than any oven you’d use to bake your goods. You never knew if it was romantic or not, but you’d look forward to Ace disrupting the clubs time just to taste your cooking or treats. You felt that all over again. Nostalgia kissed your cheeks like a long loss lover.

“Hate that guy…”

Your trance was disrupted by your co worker. Pudding watched him disappear with folded arms. Her aura and expression was devilish despite her sweet, pure appearance. Her tone against Ace might as well shoot him through his chest. You raised an eyebrow.

“Why?” You pondered. You felt embarrassed even thinking about being flattered by Ace considering one of your closest friends seemed to chew his head off. She scoffed and cleaned the cashier counter of crumbs.

“He comes in here and just eats all of our samples and says—ahem” She cleared her throat only to attempt to lower her voice to sound masculine, only to not really work as much. “It’s only samples, they’re meant to be free” Pudding attempted to mock Ace’s voice, only to cause a snicker from you.

“He seemed to really like the cinnamon sugars. That’s all I care about” You replied, shrugging your shoulders bashfully. You felt Puddings eyes pierce through you.

“Don’t tell me you actually like him?” Pudding judged. Those words made the hairs on your body spike up. You peered toward her and just scoffed.

You didn’t respond. You didn’t know how to. You just brushed past her to place the tray you’ve been clenching on back in the kitchen where it belonged. You heard Puddings small heals crack behind you like firecrackers.

“If you actually like him I wouldn’t… Entirely judge you”

Pudding rolled her eyes as she followed you to the kitchen. The room was filled of the smell of fresh vanilla cake. Pudding must’ve made it after her tussle with Ace. You carved a smile.

“I don’t like him. I mean I guess I did in high school, but I dunno” You place the tray into the vastly large sink to cleanse it from the residue of the muffins. Cleanliness is everything in the cooking industry after all.

“He probably has a girlfriend. He always has back then” You projected your voice over the loud sink. You scrubbed until the tray sparkled.

“And you wondered why I didn’t like him” Pudding remarked. You flicked off the metal sink from pouring out fresh water. You whipped your head back.

“Don’t you like that chef? Sanji? From culinary school?” Your words made Puddings face turn the same hex as a tomato. You giggled in amusement.

“N-No! He’s such a— Low life loser!” She frantically explained. She sure convinced you. She puffed her cheeks and began aggressively taking our ingredients to make yet another dish out of her emotions. You took it as a sign to just stay at the register for the day…

ʚ♡⃛ɞ

Weeks pass and Ace came in almost every day just for the same order. It started off with the cinnamon sugar muffins. Then it evolved to a cinnamon sugar muffin with a cup of black coffee. Then it evolved to just him staying at the bakery table just to study and occasionally talk to you while you were at the register. Ace might as well be an employee with how much time he’d lounge there.

Ace would sometimes bring a group of friends, sometimes consisting of his two brothers. They, too, would compliment your baking as much as Ace would but it didn’t feel the same. The way Ace said it and how’d he appreciate it on a regular basis made your heart flutter every time.

But there he was, approaching your register ready to order the same thing. You gave him a sweet smile and snaking your hand to the cinnamon sugar glass cabinet. Your hand movement made Ace carve that same smile you’d crave every time.

“Nice to see you again, Ace” You giggle, bagging his muffin and preparing his coffee. You heard his smooth chuckle from behind, like he was wrapping those toned arms around your waist.

“You too, (F/N). Can’t wait to start my morning with your baking” He winks. You turn and snap the lid on his molten coffee. You caught a glimpse of him biting his lower lips and furrowing his eyebrows, like he was pondering something.

“Hey uh-… Actually I came to ask you something” He blurted out. You just barely finished typing his order on the register to pay. You blinked your eyelids a few times.

“What is it?” You murmur, ready to expect the worse. Ace inhaled, scratching the back of his neck and using the same hand to massage his chin.

“Well uh-… Jeez this is hard” You heard him stammer. You raised an eyebrow, wondering why such a cocky, confident guy like him was struggling to talk to you.

“Are you—… Tired of the muffins? I can actually show you a new recipe you may like instead-“

“No, no!”

His freckles were drowning in his own blush. His cheeks were a bright red and you couldn’t hold in a giggle for much longer. He continued to breathe in and out until he leaned over the counter before you.

“I was wonderin’ if… Maybe you’d like to come over? We’ve been talking for a bit I figured I’d— Y’know—“

You put him to a halt by finally letting out your flattered giggles. Ace felt even more embarrassed and looked up at you with folded lips. You waved your hands.

“Sorry, sorry It’s just—.. Are you asking me out right now? Like a teenage girl?” You tease. Ace let out a bashful chuckle, feeling oddly naked that now he’s doing the asking.

“Yeah, I guess so” His response made you giggle even more. You died down and eyed him up and down with loving eyes.

“Yes, I’d love to. Better have a nice dinner planned for an experienced chef and baker like me” You mimicked Aces confidence only to make him laugh with you. You both had bright cheeks and felt like teenagers again.

“Okay then. I’ll see you there” He winked. You heard a swish come from the counter. He moved his arms off to walk off without his average order. He didn’t care about his regular, he cared about asking you out. You gushed. Especially when you read his address name and number written on a sticky note he may or may not have pre-written on the counter.

“Remember when you said you don’t like him?” A squeaky voice from behind spoke. It sent shockwaves throughout your body and you hitched.

“Pudding…”

ʚ♡⃛ɞ

You made sure to wear your best yet appropriate outfit. Nothing too fancy but nothing like you just rolled out of bed. You patted down your clothes, adjusted your hair and made sure you looked presentable as you stood before Ace’s front door. Once you finally gained the confidence to knock, you heard swears from beyond the door. A frantic, brunette swung open the door and you were startled, to say the least.

“Uh— Are you alright?” You asked, peering behind his shoulder to see a small gust of smoke. Did he just come out of a raging fire you didn’t know about, you thought.

“Hey!” He sang, carving an awkward smile. He stepped aside to open the door for you. “Yeah Im uh— Great! Come in”

Ace was nervous and struggling to make a good environment for you. Usually, this would be easy for him since he was a harem himself but he genuinely liked you. Something about you feeding his stomach in just the right ways and you being sweet and generous about it.

Ace’s kitchen was full of smoke upon arrival. There laid a baking tray on his kitchen counter and you eyed it for a moment. Had Ace been… baking?

“I uh— Made you something” He closed the door and scurried to the kitchen. He tried picking up the tray but scorched his hand. He winced and shook his hand to erase the pain. You almost let out a snicker.

You quickly dropped your bag to approach your date to analyze his creation. They looked like rocks shaped in muffins. Seemed like Ace kept them under the heat for too long…

“You can tell I’m not quite the best baker” He chuckled while running his fingers through his locks to massage his scalp. You picked up a “muffin” and scrunched up your nose as you took a bite.

It was awful.

But somehow you can enjoy it regardless since this guy went out of his way to enter your hobbies and talents to impress you. You carved a smile. The best ingredient for any dish is love.

“How about we bake something together” You suggested. Ace’s eyes went wide and bright, like you spoke heavenly words that melted in his ears.

You tied your hair to get it out of the way, scrubbed your hands and rummaged around Ace’s house for ingredients. Ace had just enough to make a simple vanilla cake with buttercream icing. You mainly instructed Ace to grab the ingredients and measure them out for you to mix and mix.

You let Ace lick and eat the spoon you used to mix the cake batter. He moaned and smiled like a child and it made you blush. You poured the cake batter into a baking tin that was doused in butter. You splashed a bit of batter on your face on accident. You felt Ace’s thumb pick it up effortlessly and lick it off. You swore you’d melt right there and then. You left it up to Ace to place it into the oven as you began to prepare the frosting.

“So what made you wanna bake?” You ask in the midst of your mixing. Ace had been leaning against the counter on his back and licked his fingers of any excess batter.

“I guess… I wanted to impress you?” Ace looked at you with pleading eyes. You felt your body temperature rise into the clouds just by his look. “I um-.. Never really felt this way about a person before… Sorry If it’s so awkward”

You made sure to test the icings texture until it was to your liking. You smiled in delight.

“So you’re saying you like me?” You blurted out, taking a sheet of plastic wrap to cover the bowl of icing while the cake finished baking in the oven. You saw Ace’s face plaster in pigment.

“Yeah”

His voice was low and genuine. You both made direct eye contact for a moment before you looked down to avoid the overwhelming amount of embarrassment. Ace carved a smile, already knowing you won’t object his confession. If anything, you felt the same way.

“Do you?” His voice was low and soft. He caressed you without even touching you… yet. You let out a small giggle and sigh.

“I can say so, yeah…” You reply. Ace’s chuckle hugged you. You fondled with your fingers, twisting and turning them before opening your mouth agape. “So…”

You caught a quick glimpse of Ace biting his lip before he laid a hand on your cheek. You hitched before you felt his warm, tender lips on yours and quickly synced against yours. You hum, sending vibrations throughout his face. You felt him smile against your lips and it was only contagious. You couldn’t help it.

You pulled away and fluttered your eyes open. You looked up and down at his face and he smiled like a dope. You giggled.

“Your lips taste like cake” You gush. Ace chuckled and licked his own lips for a taste. Your bodies were pulled close, like just one slight move could end up in a kiss again.

“Guess that made the kiss more enjoyable” He winked. You sarcastically rolled your eyes and pushed his face away. You can only take so much flattery.

Once the cake was done and cooled, you and Ace giggled while you lathered it with the frosting. It obviously looked like a mediocre, homemade cake but that didn’t matter. This wasn’t just your cake. This was you and Ace’s cake. It meant more to you than anything that you didn’t even wanna take a bite. Ace waved a fork full of the cake in your face.

“No you try it first!” You reject. Ace shook his head and folded his lips.

“No, no. You’re the guest, c’mon” He encouraged. You sighed, knowing that you’d get nowhere if you didn’t oblige. You open your mouth wide to let Ace drop the cake into your mouth and chewed.

It tasted better than anything you’ve tasted before. The ingredients were generic, but this cake tasted more magical simply because you made it with someone you felt intimate with. You smiled.

“It’s amazing…”

“I know”

You giggled helplessly and swallowed. Ace took a bite himself and shook his head. Of course it was amazing to him. He could taste anything you’d made any day of the week and appreciate like it was his meal on death row.

“Now, here’s the billion dollar question” Ace spoke, liking off the excess icing off the fork. You hummed.

“Which is sweeter? Me or the cake?” He smirked. You giggled and shook your head. You took it upon yourself to wrap your arms around his neck and you felt his arms secure your back.

“Let’s find out”

Those three words made Ace latch his hungry lips against yours. Your mouths were as sweet as the bakery you worked at. All you could taste was vanilla and buttercream. This was, by far, sweeter than the cake. You both made out in sync for what seemed like years. Ace pulled away, leaving a small connection between your lips via saliva.

“So..?”

“Your lips, for sure”

all credits and characters belong to eiichiro oda

[starstruck-cupid]

The Sweater

Part 5 of Unnamed Charlie fic with a bit of spicy Kirby x fem!reader

(edit: name change. Formerly unnamed)

A/n: I have noticed a continuity error in my story. Scream 4 takes place in October. I thought it took place in September. I will be switching to autumn instead of spring from here on out. Also there is Kirby x reader x Charlie at the end of this. The next chapter will most likely be the last of this series. I might make it a little more Kirby x reader towards the end.

TW: mentions of murder, mentions of stalking, mentions of theft, sexual contact. I think that's it.

///////////////////////////////////////<3//////////////////////////////////////////

The morning after the kiss was crazy. Olivia was dead. Murdered. People were saying it was brutal. There were plenty of rumors and claims about the killing, but none were confirmed. I think Sidney's publisher is dead too

It's been three days. I was more scared than ever. I haven't gotten any more texts but it seems like things keep disappearing. I don't know when or why these things are being taken.

Little things that shouldn't be missed, but things I noticed. I'm an organization mess. Everything is all over the place, but I know what goes where. I'm missing 2 more pairs of underwear, and some lewd Polaroids that I thought were well hidden.

Charlie and I still haven't talked about the kiss. I'm not sure if we ever will. We kissed once after. We've definitely been closer physically. I'm okay with it. I'm content.

I can't believe we still have school tomorrow. People are dying. Three students are dead. We should at least get a few days to mourn.

Charlie and I were supposed to hang out today. He texted me telling me he'd be here later, but I decided to just go to bed.

I can't help but feel anxious. More than usual. Something bad is going to happen. Ghostface is clearly back. I think my break-ins and missing things might be connected.

I'm laying in bed, stoned. Heater on,with multiple blankets piled over me, and a movie playing in the background. The cool autumn air breezing through my open window. I opted to give up keeping my window closed. It's been apparent that it's not working. I had my favorite candle lit. This was nice. I needed this.

I was in my favorite sweater, the one Charlie got me. He stole it yesterday, as he does sometimes, and now it smells like him.

I can feel myself drifting off. My eyes and mind go black

I hear the squeak of my window being closed. In my tired mind, I don't fully process the implications of that. Figuring it was Charlie, I go back to sleep.

It couldn't have been more than a few minutes later when I was woken up to the feeling of fingers rubbing up and down my thighs. I freeze.

Soon I feel a full hand continuing the motion on the back of my thigh.

I feel someone climbing into the bed, up towards me. As they lay behind me, a scent fills my nose. Charlie.

I feel him kiss the back of my head and slip his hand up my sweater. He lays it on my bare stomach. His hand is cold compared to my stomach.

Moving back towards him, I bask in his warmth. His hand slips up to my clothed breast. My bra was unpadded and thin. I'm sure he could feel everything. He was gentle, though. Not attempting to do anything more than lay his hand there. It felt like he was trying to get a feel for my boundaries.

When it comes to Charlie, and what I'd let him do, there are no boundaries.

"Is this okay?" He asks, quietly, unsure if I'm asleep.

I tiredly mumble out an affirmation. We just lay there like that for awhile until we're both sleep.

<3

Today is the first day that Charlie is still in bed with me in the morning. The sun is shining through the curtains. For a while we just lay there together, talking and listening to the random vinyl that he put on. Everything seems perfect right now.

Charlie told me about his, Robbie's, and Gale's agreement. I told him about how My dad said my mom had always been a fan of Gale. He offered to get something signed.

Finally we get up for school. Getting back to our usual routine after that break of not talking is so nice. I finally don't have to get my coffee alone every morning.

<3

School was the same as everyday, surprising. We have "cinema club" today after school. I think the name is dumb but I'd never tell the boys that. Today we have Sidney and Gale visiting.

I can't lie. I wasn't listening at all. Until the stab-a-thon was mentioned. I had forgotten about that. I had to go. Going it's a requirement for being friends with Charlie. It seems that we're a bit more than friends now, so that's absolutely no way I can skip.

<3

Charlie makes me come early to help set up. I don't really mind. It means I can start drinking early, and I get the best seat.

After a bit of the, people start screaming and running. Then I see Gale on the ground and Dewey shooting a masked Ghostface. Running to Gale, I begin to put pressure on the wound.i stay there until ems shows up.

Once I finally get back to my car, Charlie is already there.

"Kirby invited us to her house for an after party" he said, getting in the passenger side.

"You direct and dj, and I'll drive"

After a few minutes on the road, I finally decide to do something I should have done a while ago.

"Charlie?"

"Yeah?" I see him turn to look at me from" the corner of my eye.

"I think Ghostface has been stalking me."

"Stop the car" his voice booming with demand.

I do. I pull over and put the car in park. I turn to him, the look on his face is hard to read.

"What makes you think that?"

I show him the texts, the video, and tell him the list of things that have gone missing from my room. Charlie insists that we should tell people when we get the house. I agree and get back on the road.

Once we're there, I feel calmer. I know these people. I feel safe with these people.

Jill and Kirby are sitting next to each other, Charlie is putting on Stab 7, despite mine and Jill's disagreement.

Charlie, Kirby, and I have a back and forth about what took place earlier.

I've always had positive feelings about Kirby, but I never realized she was this cool. The more I talk to her, the more I understand Charlie's crush. I'm sitting in the chair closest to her. As we continue the conversation, Kirby puts her hand on my upper thigh, pinky and ring finger slightly under my skirt.

Then Trevor walks in. I don't trust him. I don't think any of us do. Trevor mentions the unlocked door.

"I'm sorry. I was the last one in," I quickly shot out. Kirby gives me a reassuring smile.

Charlie gets up and Trevor sits in his seat

After a debate about how Trevor found out we were here. Jill goes to find her phone.

"So Charlie, Robbie. How does it feel to be accessories to a crime? I mean, really, Dewey's wife?" Trevor asks, arrogantly.

"My life is over" replies Robbie.

"So which one of you sent me a text from Jill's phone?" Trevor follows up.

(Sorry straight readers, I had to add some Kirby x reader)

After some discourse about the phone, Trevor leaves, leaving Kirby, Charlie, and I alone.

I had moved over to share the couch with Kirby and Charlie sat in my previous seat. Robbie leaves from the kitchen to the balcony.

Once he was gone, Kirby pulled me closer to her, inviting Charlie to sit on the other side of me. She turns to us, putting her hand on my thigh.

"So are you two together?" She asks. We look at each other unsure how to answer.

"So Charlie, you wouldn't mind if I did this? She asks, putting a hand on my cheek and pulling me to look at her. Not kissing close, but close enough to feel her breath on my lips. She proceeds to slid her hand up my thigh, pushing my skirt up slightly, until she was under it. Then she slid a finger under the waistband of my underwear and pulled, letting it snap against my skin. I unconsciously hiss as it hits me. Kirby pushed my chin to face my head towards Charlie. He looks flustered, a pink tint dusting his face. I can see a prominent bulge in his pants.

Trevor walks in, making us all pull apart in embarrassment.

After letting him know him upstairs, Trevor makes himself comfortable in the seat closest to us. Charlie hastily gets up and leaves.

After some discourse between Kirby and Trevor, he leaves to get Jill. Leaving me and Kirby alone. Kirby sends me an apologetic look while placing a hand back on my thigh and giving a reassuring squeeze. Then she kisses me. Lightly, but needy. When she pulls away she goes back to watching the movie like nothing ever happened.

[mirisss]

Chapter 6

Wordcount ≈ 3.4k

Warnings: Anxiety, panic-attack, trauma, self-doubt, let me know if I should add anything else,

Taglist: @ayoo-bangtan, @lose-lose07, @kingcarrot-thecarrotking, @starjane312, @reighlee-greaves​, @hi-39024,@queenmea604, @septicrebel, @justayoungandwisefangirl

Please reblog! 

Requests are open!

That night, (Y/n) dreamt of how tomorrow would be. The company. The thought was a bit frightening but also exciting, to see how her family worked. She wanted to see it, she wanted to know what they did, after spending some time with 3racha she was curious about the others. Tomorrow will be a good day, it has to be. 

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9

(Y/n)’s POV

*RRRRIIIINNNGGGG*

The first thing I heard as I began waking from my deep slumber was the melodic ringing of Minho’s alarm. Though, Minho himself did not seem to hear it as his breathing was just as slow and steady as earlier during the night. I woke up once during the night because I had ended up kicking away my comforter and feeling cold. I stretched in my bed still lying down before I sat up rubbing my eyes to try and rub the sleepiness away. Which did, in fact, not work. I stretched one more time before standing up and quietly walked over to the bed in which Minho was sleeping, the alarm still ringing from his phone on the bedside table. He must have been really tired if he didn’t notice the loud alarm that had been ringing for about 5 minutes. I looked at the phone and turned the alarm off then I looked over at the dancer who seemed very peaceful. I gently shook him a little, “Minho, Minho, you need to wake up, it’s 5.38 am,” I heard some commotion outside the door to Minho’s room meaning at least two others were awake. Finally, after me shaking him for a bit and trying to talk him awake he responded. “Hmm, oh, yeah, huh? oh, (Y/n), I’ll get up,” Once I saw that he was actually awake I stepped away from the bed and made my way over to Jeongin’s room as he was mostly in charge of my clothes as the group's fashionista, also he was surprisingly the only one with room for more clothes in his closet. 

Just before leaving Minho, I looked behind me to make sure he was actually getting up, which he was. “I’ll go get ready, are you making breakfast today as well?” “Huh? Oh, uh, no. Days like these we usually eat at the company at around 8-9, Chan-hyung and Binnie sometimes make a protein shake or something like that but the rest of us usually eat later, why? Do you want me to make something?” “No, it’s fine. I’m not hungry, I was more asking in case you needed the help,” Minho gave me a cute smile, “That’s very sweet of you, but you should save that spirit for the company. We have a busy day ahead of us,” I nodded, and then I hurried out to find I.N. 

As I opened the door from Minho’s bedroom I was met with the mess that is Stray Kids in the morning. First I saw Chan with a dumbbell in one hand and a glass full of some pink-brownish liquid - probably one of those protein smoothies shakes Minho told me about. He noticed me and gave me a smile before continuing with his breakfast-work out whatever he was doing. I turned my head and was met with a yawning Seungmin who was about to walk into me as he had his eyes closed while yawning. “Woah, sorry (Y/n). Didn’t - uh - see you there, I haven't fully woken up yet,” “It’s okay, just be careful. You could hurt yourself,” I tried smiling at him full of energy, but even I was struggling to stay awake. For the first time in my life I can sleep without worry and to be honest, it is the best sleep I have ever experienced, I hope to always have these kinds of slumbers. After giving me a quick little nod he continued his path toward the kitchen, probably. And I continued on my way to Jeongin. 

“Morning bunny!” “Good morning Felix!” “(Y/n), did you sleep well?” “Yes, I slept very well! How about you Hyunjin?” “That’s good! Yes, I did. You on your way to Innie?” “Yes, I need to look good for my first day working, right?” Hyunjin laughed as I said that. “You always look good, and I’m sure Innie will have something nice thought out for you,” I nodded my head before walking a little further. I passed by Han’s door and I could hear him rushing around inside, I decided I would say good morning later as he was busy now. Finally, right before I came to Innie’s room, I ran into Changbin, or rather, Changbin ran into me. “Holy, woah, OMG I’M SO SORRY (Y/n), I didn’t mean to bump into you. Are you okay?” Changbin looked over me as if a car had run over me. It made it even worse when I flinched at his raised voice. I knew that neither Changbin nor any other members would ever hurt me, but it was a reflex to flinch away from someone with a raised voice. “I promise, I’m okay,” Different from the previous morning greetings the last minutes my voice now only came out as a whisper, I wanted to be confident, I wanted to stop being scared of everyone, I wanted to be normal. But I can’t. Not now and perhaps maybe never. I saw the worry swirling inside Changbin’s eyes, I saw how he wanted to go back in time and change everything. I just shook my head, I have to come past this weakness, maybe if I wasn’t coddled after something happened, I would grow stronger. I walked passed Binnie until I reached Jeongin’s room. The door was ajar so I lightly pushed it open, I found Innie inside the room holding some of the clothes they had bought for me the day before. 

“Good morning Jeongin,” I.N turned his head so quickly I thought he would end up with whiplash, he raised his hands one at a time holding the shirts in front of him, probably imagining the clothes on me. He was tilting his head and he didn’t seem to be able to pick one over the other. “Hm, morning sweetie,” My heart skipped a beat as the nickname fell out of his mouth so smoothly. “Are we feeling cream white or soft pink? Hmm, both are cute… Bunny, do you know how cold it is outside?” “Um, no sorry,” “No worries, let me check on my phone” Innie laid the shirts down on his bed with a couple of pants and skirts and whatnot before checking his phone. “Hm, it is not too cold outside and we’re going to be inside mostly but you might get cold in the dance studio… Hmm, the cream hoodie it is… Okay, let’s get you dressed. We’re kind of in a hurry,” He gave me his signature smile which in turn made me smile, I had calmed down from the incident with Changbin, I hope he isn’t feeling too bad about it. I’m just being silly… Right? I’m just silly. I tried to shake away that feeling and calm down, I knew that I was a little tense about today. I’m going to meet a lot of new people and I might get overwhelmed but I’m supposed to be there for the boys so that can’t happen. What if they don’t want to keep me if I can’t keep it together? They wouldn’t abandon me, would they? My pulse was rising at an alarming rate, my breathing was erratic, and I began seeing how Stray Kids would abandon me if I didn’t meet their expectations. I would lose my one true home. 

I was brought back to reality by Jeongin who had enveloped me in a gentle hug, I could hear him lowly whispering my name and that it would be okay. I noticed that we were no longer standing up but rather sitting on the floor. I wasn’t sure how we ended up on the floor but here we were. “(Y/n), it’s okay. Don’t worry, everything will be fine. (Y/n), darling, please calm down, you need to breathe, okay? Just take a deep breath,” I wanted to answer but I couldn’t, I tried taking a deep breath but it was futile, I could barely tell if I was breathing. “Breathe with me, baby. Everything is okay, you’re alright.” I.N continued trying to calm me down which eventually worked after a couple of tries I managed to take a couple of deep breaths and I could finally respond. “Thank you,” I was barely audible but Innie had heard me. “(Y/n), what happened? Did I do something to trigger you? Did something happen earlier?” Jeongin was gently stroking my head, an act which was very soothing for my panicking mind. “I’m just being silly. I’m sorry. We’re going to be late because of me,” “Hey, bunny. No, don’t say you’re being silly. I know we don’t know your entire story but we understand that you have been through a lot and that certain days are going to be difficult, and we are never going to blame you for these things. So please don’t shut us out, talk with us, with me, when something is bothering you or making you worry no matter what it is,” I shifted away from him a tiny bit just to see his face but not enough for him to stop touching my hair. Jeongin was looking at me with such sincerity and what I want to say was love. “I just, can’t help but think of all the ways I will let you guys down and when that happens you’ll abandon me like everyone else,” Jeongin’s eyes swarmed with even more adoration and sadness after I said that. “(Y/n), if we were like that, that we kick people out for not being perfect then none of us would be here. I definitely wouldn’t be here, I was struggling so much in the beginning, I had no confidence and I almost gave up. I wanted so badly to be an idol but so many people told me that I would never be able to reach that dream because I didn’t have any talent and I believed them. When I first joined SKZ I was a mess, I tried to act like I knew everything even though I didn’t because I didn’t want the others to tell me I was bad. But once I finally opened up to them they helped me become better, they accepted me for who I was flaws and all and they helped me grow into the idol I am today. We all have our own stories and our own pasts. Do you want to know one of the reasons why we named our team ‘Stray Kids’?” I was so close to crying hearing Jeongin tell me his story or at least part of it. I couldn’t say anything so I simply answered with a barely noticeable nod. “All of us come from different pasts and when we found each other we felt lost like we didn’t belong anywhere, we were Stray kids, kids with no home but we found a home in each other. All of us together make a whole, we care so much for each other no matter the flaws or pasts we have. And the same goes for you, we care so so so much about you, and your past, what you have been through is not your fault, and we would never kick you out. You’re one of us now, a Stray Kid, and that, that’s forever” By now I was full-on crying. The day had barely begun and I was already a mess. Jeongin continued to lovingly stroke my hair, I noticed how the pattern of his breaths had changed signalling that he too felt emotional after sharing his story with me. I slightly shifted my position on the floor once again so that my torso and chest were facing Jeongin’s front, then I laid my arms around him ever so carefully and gave him a hug. My hands naturally found the pace at which he was stroking my hair so that I could match it with the pace I was stroking his back. We sat like that for about 3 minutes before we calmed down and stopped crying and whatnot.

I once again realized that these eight boys are my home, my forever home, my last home. I have many demons that will haunt me for the rest of my life, my past isn’t easy and I know that it will be difficult to move forward with this heavy baggage holding me back, but ever so slightly day by day with these guys, it gets a little easier. Step by step. I will reach the light, and I will stay there, with them. It will take time, but that’s okay. With them, I’m safe. With them, I have found happiness. We all have our struggles, I will try to stop being ashamed of my past and start opening up, bit by bit, just like they are. 

Reluctantly, as I didn’t really want to leave his arms yet, I pushed myself away from Jeongin’s embrace. “We need to hurry, we should have been ready like 5 minutes ago,” I could only muster up a nervous smile as I was now thinking about how the rest of the day would be once we reached the company. I.N gave me a nod and a reassuring smile before he stood up and held me up too. He handed me the outfit he had picked out and then left the room to give me privacy so that I could change into it. I changed so quickly that I almost thought I had turned into the Flash or something. Once I came out of I.N’s room I couldn’t see any of the boys around but I heard their voices coming from the hallway so I jogged there. As I turned the corner into the entry hallway I found all eight boys fully dressed and ready to go. “Sorry, that I’m late,” “Don’t worry about it (Y/n), we still have plenty of time to get there. We’re actually ready earlier than most days,” Even though I could hear the wavering of Chan’s voice, revealing that he was lying, I felt relieved that they would tell a white lie to reassure me this time. I needed that to know that they didn’t blame me, to know that they weren’t angry. I noticed that Binnie looked a bit sad though, I guessed that he was still feeling bad about our interaction a little earlier. I wasn’t ready to talk about it but I didn’t want him to feel bad about it so I hoped I could relieve him some other way. As we left the apartment I found my chance. I walked with haste in my steps to catch up with Changbin and once I reached him I grabbed a hold of one of his hands, this caused him to stop dead in his tracks. He was looking at our interlocked hands before he looked up and met my eyes. I smiled at him before I began walking again, lightly tugging his hand that I kept intertwined with my own. Even though I wasn’t looking at him I could tell he was smiling once again. His aura and his vibe had turned happy again.  We got in the two cars and drove to the company. The entire ride I was just sitting there taking it all in, completely quiet as I listened to the hyung line speaking, still holding Changbin’s hand as a form of comfort for both him and myself. Trying to prepare myself for what is to come. 

~At the company ~

Third person POV

Once the group finally arrived at the company the boys all let deep sighs in some form of preparation. (Y/n) nervously looked out of the window toward the tall building, from one perspective it looked quite inviting as if inside that building there was a whole new world, from another perspective it looked like something from a horror movie, at least in (Y/n)’s opinion. (Y/n) knew that it wouldn’t be easy, not now and probably not in the future either however it would get easier as she gets used to it. With shaky steps and a worried frown, (Y/n) got out of the car following the SKZ members toward the entrance of the building. The second they got inside the building (Y/n) was hit with a tsunami wave of stimulus, so many sounds, scents, lights, and people. It was overwhelming, the hybrids knees almost gave out under her. However, the second she began to waver Bang Chan was at her side and he lightly put an arm around her waist - barely touching her but he used enough contact for her to know he was there. The touch was very welcomed, it helped ground (Y/n) and remind her that she is safe because they are there with her. (Y/n) shook her head in order to shake away the anxiety, or at least attempt to. “Are you okay?” Bang Chan whispered the question so that only (Y/n) would hear it. “I think so, thank you,” “No worries, we- I am here for you,” Chan began removing his arm from around her but (Y/n) wasn’t quite ready to leave the safety of his embrace but she did understand that it might not be practical for him to walk around like that so she settled for a better solution. As soon as his hand was back by his side (Y/n) took hold of it. She shyly looked up at him hoping that he would say it was okay to do this. Chan looked back at her with a happy and bright smile and then a little nod. “Okay, let’s go, everyone. First on today’s list is a meeting regarding our next comeback, Changbin, Han and I have been working on a couple of songs but we have a lot to discuss with you guys too. After that, we have another meeting regarding some variety show appearance or something like that. Then we have breakfast time, and after that, we have a couple of hours to work on whatever we want so 3racha will be working on songs and the rest of you will either be there with us or doing your own things. That’s pretty much the plan for today,” Bang Chan said before he began walking, slightly pulling (Y/n) with him by their connected hands. 

After a couple of minutes, the group came to the meeting room. (Y/n) froze in front of the door, worried once again about what would happen. This time though, she wasn’t shaking. Han walked up to her and tapped her shoulder, (Y/n) turned her head in his direction trying to appear calm but Han saw how stressed her eyes were. How could he not? He knew exactly was she was feeling, Han himself has struggled with anxiety for many years so he saw a bit of himself in the bunny. “Hey, you’ll be okay. I know it seems very scary but you will be okay, we are here, and we won’t leave you alone, not for a single second. You can hold my hand if you want to, for the entire day, you can hold onto me, I won’t push you away, I will be here if you need to find comfort in someone, okay? And, if anyone is mean to you, we’ll tell Chan-hyung and he’ll take care of it. That person won’t ever be mean to you again after that, so you will be okay. We will be okay together,” He finished with a convincing smile, (Y/n) couldn’t help but smile back at him because he was speaking so seriously yet doing silly faces, all to help make (Y/n) feel safe. Maybe it won’t be as bad as I thought. I have them after all. Come at me world, I’m not alone anymore, I have a family that will protect me now. So give me your worst, I will be able to handle it as long as I have them. 

~ To be continued ~ 

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog! 

[jj0latunji]

Dear Diary - KSI Imagine

Here's another imagine from Wattpad for y'all to read and hopefully like , send in any requests you have and I'll get to writing.

Here's JJ looking great in a suit oooooh.

January 19th 2020

9:45 p.m

London, England.

Dear Diary,

It finally happened, we finally broke up . I'm heartbroken don't get me wrong but I knew it was coming when he started getting distant.

I just walked into his apartment, ended things , wished him well and left. Funny thing is he didn't even realise it was my birthday today, imagine my boyfriend of 5 years didn't remember my birthday because he was too busy working on a YouTube video.

I do feel sad but not as sad as I should be considering I've ended this long relationship. I think it's just not set in fully yet , maybe it will when I wake up alone in bed tomorrow, when I have no one to share my breakfast with , no one to cuddle with when the apartment gets too cold . I just hope that when it sets in , it's not too bad .

I just want to forget everything about him and what we had and hopefully move on. I think I can do it but let's see.

I'll write to you again tomorrow and let you know how I'm feeling cause your the only one that I can talk to now about my feelings.

Love you Diary

Y/N signing off

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March 1st 2020

10:43 p.m

London, England

Dear Diary,

I've been such a mess. I knew people said breakups would be hard but I didn't know it would be this hard. All I do is sit around the apartment and cry. Even Talia said I've been crying too much and that's when I realised that I've been crying all the time cause Talia usually cries a lot too.

She asked me if she could move in with me for a while since there was some work to be done for her apartment but I know it's probably because she wants to make sure I don't do something drastic.

I hate being this emotional and feeling like I'm a burden to others. Imagine being the livewire of the group, the one always having fun and making jokes and now you can't seem to even crack a smile. That's how I feel.  Everything reminds me of him. I just want to be better and I'm trying and I hope with Talia here to talk and get advice from I'll be better.

I promise to be better

See you tomorrow, Talia will be here so hopefully it's a much more happy day.

Love you Diary,

Y/N signing off

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April 13th 2020

4:31 a.m

Ibiza, Spain

.

Dear Diary,

I finally feel better, feel more like myself. Who knew all it would take was Talia's cooking and care and a trip away with my girls.

Today is the last day for us at the resort and we've had an amazing day. Gee and Freya got me some stuff from when they went shopping and this one top OMG it's so pretty.

I've been lighter on the drinks today after last night's debacle. But hey atleast we got some drinks on the house today because the guy I made out with turned out to be a bartender.

I felt guilty about the kiss but the girls said I was single and had nothing to worry about , but there's still that small voice in me that says different. Anyways I just maintained some distance with him and just awkwardly smiled when he tried hitting on me again. I'm really out of touch with the flirting game :(

Anyways we're going back home tomorrow morning and I'm glad Talia talked me into coming on this trip , I needed this.

See you tomorrow Diary,

Y/N signing off

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April 21st 2020

12:48 a.m

London , England

Dear Diary,

You won't believe this but I GOT THE PARIS JOB. OMG I'M SO HAPPY I CAN'T CONTROL MYSELF.

This has been such a dream and I'm glad they asked again after I rejected them last time. I probably should have gone the previous time itself seeing how mine and JJ's relationship turned out. I put my dreams on hold for him but he couldn't.... Anyways forget about him.

I leave for Paris in a month and have to work there for about a year and then I can return here and continue to design. Talia and the girls were overjoyed with the news but then we all started crying thinking about how we would be apart.

The girls want to organise a party before I go so I can properly say goodbye to everyone and I agreed. Nothing bad can happen at a party right.

But I'm so excited.....PARIS BABYYYYYYY.

See you tomorrow Diary,

Y/N signing off

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May 7th 2020

04:23 a.m

London , England

Dear Diary ,

I had so much fun at the farewell party that the girls organised. They invited basically every single friend I had in London and miraculously everyone showed up to bid goodbye.

I caught up with so many people and even enjoyed a free Talia Mar concert in which she performed all my favourite songs of hers , that girl is so talented I hope she gets her big break soon. Simon and Tobi stood with me the entire night asking me if I needed anything , both of them are like the brothers I never had , hell the Sidemen are the family I never had and I'm so glad these guys are part of my life. I owed a lot to them and I'm glad we stayed friends even after my breakup with JJ...

Talking of JJ, I saw him tonight for the first time since the breakup. He seemed to be taking it well , and since this is my little secret vault I can tell you that he looked good too. But I didn't have that urge to run into his arms and cling onto him forever, I think I'm finally over him and seeing him tonight assured me that there was almost no feelings at all towards him. It felt freeing almost.

After the party  , me and Talia came back home and ate leftovers before she went to sleep tired as all hell and so am I so I'm going to get some rest too and start packing from tomorrow.

See you soon Diary,

Y/N signing off

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May 28th 2020

9:36 p m

Paris , France.

Dear Diary,

I finally made it to PARIS and OMG I'm so excited I couldn't even start explaining to you of how I'm feeling.

I bid goodbye to all my friends at the airport and took the flight here and just reached the apartment the company got me a couple of hours ago. Again I'm only telling you this cause you are my secret vault, JJ wasn't at the airport to say goodbye and a part of me was hoping he would turn up like Ross in F.R.I.E.N.D.S and like we would have a fairytale moment but he didn't turn up and I boarded my flight.

I mentally kicked myself for having expectations from JJ again cause I know he'll always let me down. I NEED to get over him and the best thing is maybe to get someone new to love and cherish...... I've been here for a day and let me tell you the options are limitless.

I'm staying with another girl named Sophia, she's German and a few years younger than me. She seems really fun , like a German version of Freya almost. She made me dinner and had my room ready for me when I arrived. She's such an angel.

I need to report for the job tomorrow morning so I'm going to eat dinner and get some rest.

See you tomorrow Diary,

Y/N signing off

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June 15th 2020

12:43 p.m

Paris , France

Dear Diary,

I've had such a fun day. Sophia took me out to one of her favourite bars and decided to get me some action if you know what I mean.

But she went away and got herself someone she liked which left me sitting with the man's friend. He was pretty though so I decided to give him a chance.

I had an amazing time with the friend though, his name's Charles and he said he was a driver or something. I wasn't concentrating on his job resume cause I was too busy lost in his green eyes which seemed he got directly from his native of Monaco.

The both of us talked until we were literally pulled apart by his friends, apparently he has an early day tomorrow and should be asleep. I quickly wrote him my number on a piece of paper and passed it to him though before he was escorted out of the bar.

I'm just waiting for him to message me now but that's unlikely given he's probably already asleep or who knows he might have even lost my number. I hope he messages me though I kinda liked him.

OMG he just messaged me and asked me out this weekend.... Looks like I have plans to make and outfits to choose.

See you tomorrow though Diary,

Y/N signing off

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June 19th 2020

3:54 a.m

Paris , France

Dear Diary,

You will not believe this. Wait let me explain it to you from the start.

Me and Charles went out for dinner at one of Paris' finest restaurants and I was having an amazing time and really having fun until we were interrupted by a bunch of teenage girls asking Charles for a photo and autograph.

Turns out he isn't some random driver, HE'S A FUCKING F1 SUPERSTAR.

He took the pictures and we quickly got out of there as our pictures were all over Twitter and people were trying to find out who I was. I'm sure they'll have figured out by the morning and that scares me... I've just got done dealing with JJ's fans and now I have another huge fandom on my ass.

I loved the date though, Charles was a gentleman and dropped me back at my place and asked me out for another date but somewhere more private and I agreed.

He's also like 4 years younger than me which made me feel old despite only being 26 , but he said that was no problem and he usually did date girls older than him.

It was also JJ's birthday today.... He's 27 and all of my friends had posted about it on their stories and on Twitter. The entire morning I debated on sending him a message but eventually decided against it , not wanting to open wounds again.

I hope he's well though....He looks well.

Anyways see you tomorrow Diary,

Y/N signing off

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July 20th 2020

10:36 p.m

Paris, France

Dear Diary,

Today was Charles last day here before he had to go back to his racing calendar. He promised to stay in touch and promised to get me to come to one of his races.

I am a little scared watching him go, long distance is never a good idea especially so early in a relationship. I didn't even know if we were in a relationship. We went on loads of dates , enjoyed ourselves and everything. His fans think we are dating, our friends think we are dating, but we still hadn't put a label on things and I was kinda glad we hadn't.

I can only hope this works out cause I've really taken a liking to Charles, something I thought I could never do again.

I'm going to drop him off at the airport tomorrow and then go to work and hopefully get that promotion I was promised. I was also free for a few days next week so I was also planning to go back home with Sophia and meet my friends again.

We'll see what happens though, for now I need to go join Sophia and help her with some work.

See you tomorrow Diary,

Y/N signing off .

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August 14th 2020

6:23 a.m

London, England

Dear Diary,

The comeback party was amazing. I introduced Sophia to all the Sidemen and the Sidegirls. She's taken a special interest in Tobi and I'm hoping they get together cause they would be an amazing couple.

I caught up with everyone including JJ. He had a new girlfriend, her name iwas Olivia. Nice girl from what I could see and everyone seemed to like her. Good for him I guess.

All the boys were also very interested in my love life seeing I was dating THE Charles Leclerc. Yeah dating , Charles asked me out a few days ago and made things official and I was happy.

Me and the group talked all night long, dancing along to some tunes as we drank the night away. I missed this and I'm glad I could have a taste of old times again.

Sober Tobi drove Talia, Sophia and me back to my old apartment and I even caught Tobi slyly passing his number to Sophia.

As soon as we got in Talia started asking me if I was okay with JJ's new relationship , cause apparently I was staring.... I didn't feel like I was staring.

Okay I was a little but not at them but at JJ , he hadn't taken down the picture of us together from the common room and I was a little confused by it. Was he holding on to the memories or does he consider it so unimportant that he just let it be.

Maybe I was thinking too much into it , it's just a damn picture.

I've moved on and so as he , I don't want to start all that again.

Anyways I'm tired as hell but I promised to write something today.

See you soon Diary,

Y/N signing off.

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September 6th 2020

11:34 p.m

Monza, Italy.

Dear Diary,

I finally came out to Italy to see one of Charles' races . Apparently it's the home race for his team Ferrari and OMG everywhere I saw only red which was the team colors.

The race didn't go well for Charles, he crashed out and didn't even finish the race and was extremely pissed off , but his best friend Pierre winning did cheer him up a little.

Today was the first time I saw how much people actually adored Charles, most of them had his mask on and I saw flags celebrating him everywhere and he couldn't walk a couple of steps before being stopped for pictures and autographs.

We had to get a hotel away from the centre of town cause we didn't want to be stampeded as soon as we left our rooms. The view from the balcony is amazing though and I took loads of pictures which again sent social media in a frenzy as all the Charles fangirls either wanted to be me or get rid of me.

Me and Charles went out for dinner and finally got to talk about how distance was affecting our relationship. It was extremely hard to find time with both our busy schedules, but we promised to try as hard as we could to manage things.

Vik was also at the race today along with Ellie who caught me up on all the gossip in the friend group. Apparently Sophia had really interested Tobi and JJ was newly single again, something about not finding love or something. Sucks to be him I guess.

Anyways I'm heading back to Paris tomorrow and Charles is going to Singapore. Back to the normal routine I guess.

See you back in Paris Diary,

Y/N signing off.

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September 7th 2020

4:51 a.m

Paris , France

Dear Diary,

I went to see JJ perform today, yeah shock but I was basically hoodwinked into it by Sophia and Talia who told me it was someone else performing.

I was glad I went cause I saw the girls and boys again and truth be told even enjoyed the performance.....he always loved performing live and it showed.

He even came over after the performance and personally thanked me for coming and I was quite taken aback. It was something I never expected him to do , he's too stubborn to do that but he did and I was kinda happy about it.

We all then went out for dinner and I was sat at the end just checking my phone to see if Charles responded to my texts. Things were really dry between us with all the time zone differences and I knew the road down which this relationship was heading, I am just trying to delay the inevitable.

Everyone kept asking me about Charles and I just kept saying everything was good when it is not.

All of us are going to Disneyland tomorrow for a day and I can't wait for it. I've always loved Disneyland and it was one of mine and JJ's favourite vacation spots.

So I'm going to get some sleep, see you later diary,

Y/N signing off

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December 16th 2020

11:34 p.m

Paris, France

Dear Diary,

Well I'm single again..... Yeah but this time it's mutual. Things were just not working out and we decided it was better to stay friends. Charles and I were still young and had our entire lives in front of us and didn't want to hold on to something that was clearly not build for the long term. I enjoyed this relationship but alas all things come to an end.

Everyone keeps asking me if I'm okay and I say I am cause I truly am. I'm nowhere near as sad as I was last time. Last time was hell , last time was like losing the best thing in my life.

Enough of the sob story, I'm going back to London for Christmas and New Year, I was invited by JJ.... Yeah JJ. We've been talking and texting like a couple of friends since his Paris show and it's been nice.

I'm almost complete with my work for this year so I might even go to London a little earlier depending on whether my boss let's me go, but she's a sweetheart so she probably will.

The next time I write to you will probably be in London.

So see you then Diary,

Y/N signing off

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January 1st 2021

4:34 a.m

London, England

Dear Diary,

You will not believe this..... I kissed JJ. Well more like we kissed each other but we kissed as the clock struck 12 which means we didn't break the tradition.

It was nice.... I don't know how to explain it but it was nice. We've been talking a lot more and Talia thinks we're on our way to getting back together but I think it's more that we're just good friends now..

But good friends don't kiss each other on the balcony under the starry night do they... Fuck I'm going to be thinking about this a whole lot.

Do I want these doubts in my mind or do I just go on with my life as usual cause it doesn't matter.

Moving on.... I can literally hear Sophia and Tobi making out in the room next to me , very horny people I must add .

Anyways I must go sleep now. I'll see you soon Diary.

Y/N signing off.

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May 28th 2021

9:45 p.m

Paris , France

Dear Diary,

I'm done with all my packing and getting ready to go back to London. The office held a little sending away party for me and Sophia. Yeah I somehow convinced my boss to send Sophia with me to London too and she politely accepted.

I need to leave for my flight in a couple of minutes but I decided to write to you before leaving.

I laugh looking back at my year here. So much has happened. I had so much fun at my dream job , had a fling with a famous F1 driver , made a new friend for life and made up with my ex. So much good things have happened.

So thank you for all this Paris.

Tu as été très bon avec moi

Anyways see you in London Diary,

Y/N signing off.

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June 19th 2021

11:57 p m

London, England

Dear Diary,

It's JJ's birthday again and we all celebrated it together out at dinner and afterwards at his place. We all had a fun time, he's 28 now and that's CRAZY. Cause that's the age that we wanted to get married at , you know slow things down and start a family age.

He pulled me away from everyone for a chat too and asked me out for a date . I said I would think about it. I want to go , trust me I WANT TO GO but I don't know if going down that road again is for the best. All the girls think it's for the best and so do all the boys but I still have my doubts.

You know what I'll give it a try. Nothing can go wrong after a date can it.

I'll message him and tell him yes , we'll go on a date. If it's good okay and if it's not then that's okay too.

I'm hoping it goes well though eventhough to others it seems like I don't want it to go well.

I hope JJ suprises me and things work out.

See you soon Diary,

Y/N signing off.

---------------------------------------------------

September 7th 2023

10:43 p.m

London, England

Dear Diary,

We finally got married. I'm finally Y/N Olatunji.

Everything went perfectly. Like not 1 problem came up , it seemed like a fairytale.

I cried a lot during the day. Cried while putting on the dress, cried while walking down the aisle with Simon , cried while JJ read out his vows. It was amazing all throughout the ceremony.

These past 3 and a half years have been such a rollercoaster. Us breaking up , me moving to Paris, both of us getting in new relationships, then getting back together, all the trips away , all the new memories made.

It's been amazing and there's no one in the world that I would want by my side than my husband JJ..... Damn my husband like he's MY HUSBAND. I've been dreaming about this for almost 7-8 years now but it still feels surreal.

Like I'm sat here in my room and looking at him and I can't believe he's mine to hold forever. I love him so much and I'm so thankful for going out on that date in 2021.

I'm thankful for everything.

I'm going now and looking at the look in JJ's eyes , I can feel I'm in for the night of my life.

See you tomorrow Diary,

Y/N Olatunji signing off.

---------------------------------------------------

December 25th 2028

10:45 p.m

London, England

Dear Diary,

We've just had the best Christmas ever. Me , JJ and Skye spend the whole day together, just the 3 of us celebrating together.

JJ wanted to make this Christmas special since we felt that this would be the first Christmas Skye would properly remember, she was just 4 but God she was smart.

We started the day by opening presets and just like always JJ had gone all out. He had brought all kinds of toys for Skye and some jewellery for me.

I brought him a matching bracelet that we could wear together all the time and he loved it.

We all then prepared the Christmas meal , well I did and JJ and Skye helped as much as they could. We ate then all cuddled together on the sofa and watched all our favorite Christmas films.

It was perfect... Just like my life was perfect and I couldn't be more thankful for JJ and Skye for making my life perfect. They were the perfect husband and daughter any one could ever ask for and I am blessed to have them in my life.

We also took loads of pictures to go into the memories album and loved every minute of the day.

Skye is now asleep, she was tired from playing around all day with her dad. I said JJ would be back in a minute after writing this entry.

He thinks it's cute that I still write in here but little does he know how much you've helped me over the years.

Thank you Diary and I hope I see you again soon,

Y/N Olatunji signing off

A/N

Hope you enjoyed this .

Idk how it came out but the idea seemed good in my head.

A new smut coming soon.

Send in requests if you have any

Love you all

Elora signing off ✌🏻

[count-alucard-tepes]

King 👑 x reader

An unexpected encounter part 3

Part 1

Part 2

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

After staring at each other for what seems like ages, King finally broke the silence, “…you gonna say something or are we going to have a staring contest?”, he asked with a little smile.

Y/N blushed in response and clutched his mask closer to her chest as she looked away, “…I’m just…surprised…I guess my reaction is a lot less violent that yours”, she said with a little smirk.

He smirked back and rolled his eyes, “…I did apologize for that…I regretted that moment since it happened”, he said gently as he looked down at her as he reached down to stroke her cheek with the back of his fingers, “…I will always regret it”.

She flinched a little when he touched her and he was quick to retract his hand, “…forgive me…I shouldn’t…”.

“…it’s okay…I…just…this is all a lot for me to deal with right now”, she said gently as she turned away, “…we should talk more tomorrow…for tonight though…I want to just process everything…good night, King”. She would start making her way back to her quarters.

“…it’s Alber…not King to you…”, he said gently as he watched her walk away, “…mind giving my mask back before you leave?”.

“Yes, Alber…I do mind…”, she said over her shoulder, “…you have a pretty face that I’d like to continue to see…so no mask for you”.

He would roll his eyes in response and smirk, folding his arms across his chest as he watched her leave. As if he only had one mask…

After making it back to her quarters, she sat the mask down and laid down on her bed, thinking about everything that had happened in the last couple of hours before she fell asleep.

____________________________________________

A knock on her door would wake her up, she lazily went to the door and looked at her commander, “…it’s so early…why are you here?”, she asked as she rubbed her eyes like a sleepy child before going back to her bed and cuddled under the sheets.

“…it’s 11am…and you missed breakfast with Kaido…he asked for you”, Katakuri said calmly as he leaned against the door frame.

Y/N pouted, “…you know you’re not very funny…”, she said as she buried her face into a pillow, “…also you know better than I do that I wasn’t needed or asked for by anyone”.

He smirked a little, she could tell even with that scarf around him, “King’s eyes searched for you so perhaps your presence was needed by him…you are free for most of the day so don’t try to get into too much trouble…but be available if anything arises”, he said gently before tapping the door and heading out

Y/N blushed and threw a pillow at him, “…you’re the worst, you know that!”, she said with a pout.

________________________________________

King was out training in the usual forested area alone, he always couldn't find someone who could keep up with him and since Kaido was resting for most of the day...he was not needed for now.

Shirtless and maskless, he trained for hours on end before taking a seat on the ground and flapped his wings lazily as he sipped some water from his bottle. He would then feel cold metal touch his front neck, "...what's this I see...Alber with his guard down....rookie move, don't you think?", a voice said behind him.

His eyes widened and then he realized not many know his real name, he turned to look over his shoulder and saw Y/N before he smirked a little, "...you're fast...this time at least".

She huffed in response and removed her sword before going to sit next to him, "...that...was different", she said as she looked around knowing his eyes were on her every move.

"...do you like this place?", he asked gently as he rested his arms on his knees.

"Yes, I saw a waterfall not too far here...I was heading there", she said gently, "...but first...I want to do something else".

He raised a brow, "...and what is that?".

"...spar with me, Alber", Y/N said as she looked deep into his eyes.

He swallowed when she looked at him like that and said his name...what an odd feeling.

"If that's what you want, I won't go easy on you just because you are a woman", he said simply as he stood up and offered his hand to her.

She gently took his hand and stood up, "...I wouldn't expect anything less", she said as she walked away just to give them enough distance between them.

He smirked a little as he took his sword and swung it around a little, "...ladies, first...".

Without a second thought, she would attack him and their sparing would last for a few hours before Y/N called it quits. There was no way she would be able to pin him down unwillingly…he was way too experienced and much stronger than herself.

“…I could take you to that waterfall now, if you like”, King said as he slipped on his shirt and began to button it.

“Is that my reward for whipping your ass?”, Y/N asked with a smile even though that never really happened.

“…take it as my pity for your loss”, he replied with a smirk which earned a laugh from her.

“Ah thanks, that’s so kind of you…”, she said sarcastically before pouting a little, “…fine, take me there”.

It wasn’t too far of a walk before they reached the waterfall, “…here it is, I’ll give you your privacy”, King said as he slipped on his coat and was about to put his mask on.

“You don’t have to go…unless you have somewhere to be”, she said gently, her hands quickly stopping him from putting his mask on.

He hesitated and swallowed a little, “…I don’t have anywhere else to be…”, he finally said as he looked down at the woman before him.

She nodded and took his free hand into hers before smiling, “…good…then stay with me”.

How could he refuse? His heart raced as his body struggled to understand what was going on. All he could do was bring her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles gently in response.

She blushed a little as this before going to water and slipped off her shoes, dipping her toes in, “…it’s not that cold…barely even”, she said before undressing down to her underwear and walked into the water. Making her to the overhang and let the water pour all over her before looking over her shoulder, “…well…are you coming in or not?”.

The waterfall was not deep enough that he would fall ill or go too weak nor was it salt water. He knew this because he was a frequent.

His eyes could not leave the lunarian woman before him, he watched her. What was going on with him? He never was this taken back by anyone.

He snapped out of it and began undressing before walking in after her and stood behind her. His hands reached to her waist hesitantly, “…your wings are getting wet”, he whispered into her ear.

“…so are yours…we’ll just have to lay out in the sun until they dry”, she said gently as she turned and looked up at him, feeling his arms wrap around her waist a little tighter. Her hands went up his arms to his chest.

“…what are you doing to me, Y/N? Why are you making me feel things I’ve never felt before?”, he questioned as he leaned his forehead against hers and closed his eyes.

She bit her lip when he said that, “…I…should ask you the same…”.

He looked down at her for a moment before caressing her face with his fingertips and leaned down until his lips barely met hers, “…don’t stop doing it…”, he whispered before his lips met hers…firstly gently and then passionately…

((Yesss the kiss!!! I had to do the waterfall kiss because it’s so sexy! Their poor wings😂 ))

[xthelastknownsurvivorx]

Writing Patterns

List the first sentence of your last 10 AO3 works.

(I’ve also seen the “and the last sentence” variant, so I went ahead and did that.)

Thanks for the tag @bbcphile and your patience with me getting to it! Everything here is red, white, and royal blue stuff for mostly the same ship, though I think 2024 will see some other fandoms as well

Doesn't He Know (I've had Him Memorized for So Long) — one shot

first: "Get in, loser, I have coffee."

last: "Yeah, I'm sure."

Every Time My Heart Swings Back to You — 16 chapters

first: "Gabriel of Cleremont, former knight of Lord Beringar's house. Accused and convicted of attempted sodomy with His Royal Highness Prince James."

last: Maybe fate had a hand in leading them to each other, but this is Alex's choice. And it feels pretty damn good.

Not a Day I Don't Miss (Those Rude Interruptions) — one shot

first:

Alex, Had to go early for a family matter. Left with the PPOs. Didn't want to wake you. Thank you for everything. X

last: And all Henry is left with, for the rest of his life, is the feel of Alex's name on his lips.

Red, White, and Royal Switcheroo — one shot

first: "There are a lot of things worth over thinking, believe me. But this isn't one of them."

last: i meant to ask - star wars and luke huh? i've always been more of a han solo guy

SNL | Season 45 Episode 2 | HRH Prince Henry & FSOTUS Alex Claremont-Diaz — 4 chapters

first: TITLE: Categate Cold Open

last: Maybe his trip to London in a few months won't be so bad after all

Burn (They're Watching Us/I Hope That They) — lyric rewrite

first: I cherished each email you wrote me

last: I hope the world burns

Some Element of Mystery — 2 chapters (5+1 things)

first: Alex is having an existential crisis. Has been having an existential crisis for the past two hours.

last: Honestly, maybe Alex should have led with that all along.

Satisfied (Never Have Been, Never Will Be) — lyric rewrite

first: "All right, all right, that's what I'm talking about!"

last: He will never be satisfied, I will never be satisfied

The Frustrating, Intoxicating, Complicated Sum of Him — one shot

first: "Your Highness, we have arrived."

last: "No," Alex says as he shuts the door behind him, "I wouldn't."

Weird That It Happened Twice — one shot

first: "Do I really have to go through with this stupid tradition? There's so much more good I could be doing, actual people I could be pardoning instead of two modern day raptors."

last: But before he goes, he glares at Cornbread and Stuffing and says, "If it were up to me, ya'll would not be getting pardoned tomorrow."

--

Patterns:

For opening lines, I like to drop the reader immediately into the scene. Most of the time I seem to use dialogue to achieve this, but sometimes I'll borrow a line from the original piece of media.

My endings are a little less consistent. I might end on the main character musing on something that happened or central theme to the story. Or I could also be a bit more open and end on some sort of dialogue that's hopeful and hints at what might come afterwards. Other times, I just write the ending that comes the most naturally to me and feels like the appropriate conclusion.

I feel like it's been a while since is went around, so feel free to ignore if you've already done this @happiness-of-the-pursuit @14carrotghoul @affectionatelyrs @cactusdragon517 @suseagull04 and open tag as always

[humming-pokemon-helpers]

“So, Vanilla, what have you been up to? You’ve been awfully quiet lately.”

Excellent question, person I made up in my head. I’ve been watching each and every one of the Pawmark Dash to Delibird Day movies released in The Year Of The Twin Dragons 2023. There are 42 of them, which deeply unsettles me.

But unfortunately I dedicated myself to the art of cataloguing Pawmark movies when I was a much sadder and lonelier Zorperson, and I’m too stubborn to quit now. (That, and they’re a guilty pleasure; sue me.)

So, below the cut is my ratings of some of them. About 10. Not all 42, I still have some semblance of a life. I did watch all of them though, so I guess if there's any Pawmark enthusiasts who really need to know my thoughts, you can send me an ask? Or you can ask me in-person. At my New Year's party. Which is still happening tomorrow. (Psst. Here's a link if you're interested: https://discord.gg/PkmkQEVF)

1. Celebi With You: Young career businesswoman comes back to her old hometown devoted to Delibird Day and nothing else. Grandpa asks her to take over the shop. She refuses because she has a career. Local childhood-friend-man in flannel gets sad. A Celebi takes her back in time to watch her grandparents’ romance as they open the shop. She changes her mind, gets with the male lead in a very rushed side plot, everyone’s happy.

This one’s a shaky 5/10. Points for not focusing the modern romance first and foremost, but it’s so sloppily done. There's no lead-up to the kiss. And I mean, it's Pawmark. There usually isn't. But give us some level of flirtation! Grandma and gramps are cute, though. Shame grandma’s dead for no reason other than “there must be at least one dead relative in a Pawmark movie”. Also, the CGI Celebi looks TERRIBLE. Like, eye-bleedingly so. That is an onion and a few pipe cleaner legs. I know they can’t get a real Celebi, but at least get a Ditto instead!

2. A Little Holiday Maschiff: The obligatory “turn your brain off and watch cute puppies” movie. Female lead recently lost her Stoutland. Somebody leaves a box of Maschiff puppies on her step in the winter cold. She takes them to the “hunk” at the Pokémon shelter, because she’s not ready to open her heart again, but the shelter’s on the brink of being shut down. They co-pup-parent and create a Delibird Day Pokémon Pageant to fundraise and save the shelter. Get in a fight because the male lead thinks she’s actually trying to get the shelter sold. They make up. They kiss. They adopt like 3 Maschiff puppies. The end.

8/10, but not because of the plot. The “fight” they have is absolutely idiotic. No, the reason I say 8/10 is because I can understand everything those little Maschiff have to say and their commentary is worth their weight in gold. Even if 90% of it is “Am I a good boy? Can I go for a walk after this? Why am I in a box again?”. So good. 4/10 for anybody who doesn’t understand Pokémon. At least the puppies are still cute to look at.

3. Snow Warning: Short summary here because it’s so generic. F!Lead gets caught in once-in-a-lifetime blizzard on her way home. Flight cancelled. Has to share a hotel room with smarmy male lead who looks down on her job as a novelist (and is also a wildly successful businessman). The two roadtrip their way down to F!Lead’s hometown so she can go see her sick dad. Grow a begrudging respect. Eventually they kiss for some reason. Also there’s a side-plot about how the guy actually pissed off an Abomasnow and caused the whole thing, but that wasn’t really interesting. ...Somehow. How do you mess that up?

2/10. The chemistry’s off. I get going for “you hate me so bad you want to kiss me” tension, but it really just comes off like the female lead ought to sock her "date" in the face already. Instead we get a weak “Sorry I called your books stupid. I read one page of your debut novel and it’s not. Can we kiss now?”. Yawn. Also, he never apologizes for the whole Abomasnow thing, which seems like a pretty massive oversight? If we're being realistic here, that's getting held over that man's head for at least a good five years.

4. Sawsbuck’s Greetings: A movie focused around the female lead, who runs a Sawsbuck farm that’s been passed down for generations, and the male lead, who kicks puppies for a living and wants to put a golf course there. But don’t worry, he learns after she makes a deal with him that if he stays on the farm for 30 days and doesn’t see the value of it, he can buy it. Because that’s how buying real estate works. The guy actually has some traumatic history with Pokémon that the saintly female lead helps him overcome. He cuts ties with his company, moves into the Sawsbuck farm, and they have the Pawmark Kiss.

3.5/10 for me. Not even the bored Sawsbuck save this (they are so, so bored). There’s no interesting side characters anywhere! No life! Also, I will say it once again: love does not heal trauma. They try to make it seem like this man goes from erring 50 feet away from “those horrid beasts” to snuggling up with a Deerling in the early AM all thanks to a woman's love. That is not how that works. Get therapy. (I say this knowing full well I would not be as critical if it were gay. Know your biases, folks.)

5. The Chingling Ring: This is one of their “Deli-Day Wedding” movies. A sequel to last year’s “The Chingling Sing”. Female lead gets cold feet about marrying male lead. They nearly break up to all of their friends’ constant dismay. But the woman's Chimecho works with her fiance to gather 25 Chingling to show her 25 places all key to her relationship with her soon-to-be husband. Of course he’s waiting at the 25th, they kiss, make up, happy wedding, baby at the end of it.

Surprisingly, a 6.5/10. The concept is a decent one, if only they didn’t have to stick to 25 arcdamn places instead of… five? Even 12, if you’re looking for something holiday-like but smaller. Each place gets no focus at all, because of course they don’t. It’s an 80-minute movie! The gesture is really romantic though. Chingling are so so adorable. And the male lead is genuinely sympathetic throughout. Just… agh, the rush. Also, do we always need a baby at the end of the wedding ones?

6. Special Delivery: Sort of a mystery movie, on the first female lead's side. (Yes, 1/2!) She, a detective, starts receiving mysterious gifts via Delibird from a ‘secret admirer’. Determined to figure out more, she goes on a hunt through the specifics of the gifts, the places they’re ordered from, and even tracks a Delibird itself. Along the way, she keeps confiding in her best friend, the second lead, about the situation. First lead thinks it's from her coworker, but no, it's a red herring. Lo and behold, it turns out the gifts are secretly coming from... the second lead! There’s a decent coming out/confession scene, which is a compliment for a film studio where movies are produced in 5 weeks. Pawmark Kiss. End film. (Too soon.)

I promise this is not just my lesbian bias (it is), but 7/10. The two leads truly understand the power of pining. Of yearning! …The gift situation is so blatantly obvious that it very much feels like the movie spins its wheels for a while, though. I feel like they were trying to have a twist, because the male lead's pretty heavily marketed, but he also falls flat as a character other than "hey, he's there, and he probably likes you". As a result, though, I thought I was going insane for thinking the leads had chemistry for the first 50 minutes until this film fully vindicated me, something that is incredibly rare with a Pawmark movie. They’d better make a sequel. That’s up-front about its being gay, and at least halfway decent.

7. Deck The Royal Halls: What would Pawmark be without its annual foreign prince movie. This time from the made-up kingdom of “Britain”. Where are they even pulling these names from now? Bog-standard, except the two leads also have to work together to handle the King getting possessed by the legendary Calyrex along the way. Because apparently the “old family heirloom” Hometown Female Lead brings as a gift to His Highness is actually its crown. Anyways, Calyrex demands the two of them get married in the name of the kingdom. They waver on this in some royal courtship, get into a fight, and eventually agree. Happily ever after.

4.5/10: This movie is so cluttered. There’s no good justification for why the female lead is there, why her family has this ancient treasure, and why it is so absolutely crucial she marry The Prince. Calyrex’s VA is very funny during the possession scenes though. So the movie gets an extra point. Calyrex trying to give Mr. Prince Guy a confession pep talk is genuinely one of the better written comedy bits I’ve seen on the channel in a while. Shame the CGI for Calyrex is... not very good. There's no way its head is that big.

8. A Champion Chrismas: So this is what they've had Champion Leon up to since he lost his title. The Battle Tower and paying him to take part in mass-produced rom-coms. Anyways, unfortunately for the female lead, who is absolutely trying her best, this movie is entirely about Leon--or Levi, and how the self-insert (AKA, female lead) saves him from his battling slump when he comes home for the holiday season to his totally-not-Postwick small town with his totally-not-Hop little brother. (who is, actually, played by Hop Laventon. How did they get all of these people???) Anyways, the female lead shows Le-whoever the "joy of Delibird Day" again, they kiss, Le-guy wins a big championship match with his Charizard for her and shouts her out on live TV.

6/10, purely because it's fun to see how non-acting celebrities deal with acting. Also, this is 100% somebody's Leon x Reader fanfiction that got brought to Pawmark's writing room and approved without a second thought. I love that for whoever that was. (Though pretending that definitely isn't Leon and he totally isn't dating Raihan is a bit ingenuous.) Anyways, the writing sucks. The poor heroine is the epitome of a self-insert, for very obvious reasons. But I will admit, I can see why Leon has so many fangirls. He's great at playing that sort of "charming, down to earth" guy. His little brother's pretty good at acting too! Even if he really got shoved to the side for the sake of the love plot. Always seems to be the case for that poor kid...

9. Operation: Present: A movie about... Santa from the future? I think somebody saw Iron Bundle and ran away with it a bit too much. (Also, they have a real Iron Bundle there. This scares me.) Anyways, in this movie, Santa's son appears in front of a social media "influencer" with an Iron Bundle and tells her that if she doesn't convince the world Santa is real, they'll fall into a dark timeline...? I'm so lost as to who wrote this. Is this still Pawmark? I guess it's tangentially Delibird Day-related. Anyways, these two go on a... social media campaign... to spark belief in Santa. Livestreams, Chatters, anything a 60-year-old exec believes is part of social media usage, it's there. But actually, Ms. Influencer doesn't even believe in Santa herself, so they get in this big fight, until Santa's Son gets this notification that Christmas is saved or whatever. They make up. They kiss. I am so lost.

2/10, I am relatively sure this movie was made by drawing ideas out of a hat? And shoving them together? So it's a time-travel, social-media, robot-Delibird, Santa's son, romance movie? Why did they not pick an angle. Any one of those could have worked as an angle. As it is, I feel like I'm going insane even trying to describe the plot. ...And yet I feel as though I know several people this could happen to. Such is the reality of our multiverse.

10. Don't Have A Bird: Okay, they clearly used all of their ideas on the last movie. Because this one is about a woman who works at an Unfezant tip line. As in, a tip line on how to cook Unfezant at the holidays. (Which feels more like a Thanksgiving movie, but I digress!) And a man. Who is trying to cook an Unfezant. That's... the entire plot. The whole thing. Though the woman is also secretly romancing the man in real life! ...And on... the Unfezant tip line. That feels like a blatant violation of phone line policy, but what do I know! The Unfezant Guy feels betrayed by this until The Unfezant Girl brings by a perfect Unfezant, and the day is saved. Hooray.

1.5/10. Who wrote this. Who approved this. Why is it about an arcdamn Unfezant Tip Line. How far down do you have to dig for this idea. Who in the writing room called in to figure out how to unfuck their completely dry, flavorless Unfezant, and thought "You know what would be romantic?" On the bright side, absolutely none of the actors take this movie seriously, thus warranting an extra .5 points. They earned it. Nothing else did. (//Mod note. Based on a real fucking Hallmark movie.)

[jokertrap-ran]

BAD MEDICINE ~Infectious teachers~ [PC GAME] Kashu Remu (Chemistry) Route Translations (Part 14)

MC’s name is retained as the original MC name Kawana Hina.

* Words within ‘   ‘ are spoken in English – *Spoiler free : Translations under cut!

Prologue / Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10 / Part 11 / Part 12 / Part 13 / Part 14

Hina: …

Hina: (My fever finally let up, so I'm back in school after a long break…)

Hina: (But I still don't know how I should face Kashu-sensei when I see him again.)

Hina: (I'll just have to make do with sneaking around so that he doesn't spot me…)

???: Morning!

Hina: Eek!?

Friend A: Yikes!

Hina: G-Good morning!

Friend A: Ah, sorry. Did I scare you? 

Hina: No, don't be. I'm the one who got spooked. It's just been a while since I've been back in school, so I'm a little jumpy.

Friend A: I see, I see. Well, you WERE gone for a week. How are you now? Are you feeling better from the cold? 

Hina: Yeah, I'm all good now. Thanks for asking.

Friend A: That's great to hear! You were gone for so long that I was starting to worry!

Hina: Sorry for worrying you.

Hina: (Yikes, that really caught me by surprise.)

Hina: (I was so worried about what to do if I ran into Kashu-sensei that I ended up overreacting to the smallest things…)

———————————————

Kuzuha: Sup, Kawana. Feels like it's been a long time since I last saw your face around.

Hina: Wha-!?

Friend A: Oh! Good morning, Kuzuha-sensei!

Hina: Oh… it's just you, Kuzuha-sensei. You really scared me there. Good morning.

Kuzuha: Hey, hey, are you sure you're okay? I wasn't expecting to spook you that badly.

Hina: S-Sorry. I guess I'm just nervous after being absent from school for so long…

Kuzuha: What's with that? Don't tell me you're still down with that cold you had.

Hina: No. Thank you for your concern, but I've already recovered from the flu.

Kuzuha: That's good then.

Hina: Ahaha… Well, my health might be better after being forced to stay put for a week, but I can't say the same for everything else.

Kuzuha: Well, but since you've already come all the way here… Stop standing around or you're gonna be late.

Hina: R-Right.

Kuzuha: See ya.

———————————————

Hina: …Phew.

Hina: (I can't even tell him to his face that I'd mistaken him for Kashu-sensei when they don't even look alike.)

———————————————

Friend A: Hina-chan?

Hina: Ah, I'm coming!

Hina: (It must be because of the nightmare I had. Why am I subconsciously looking for him despite not wanting to see him?)

———————————————

Friend A: Bye, see you tomorrow!

Female Student A: Bye!

Hina: Hmm… Classes have already ended for the day, yet I’ve not spotted Kashu-sensei even once.

Hina: (Wait, but I don’t want to see him, so doesn’t this work out for me?)

Hina: (So why am I even trying to find him? Or do I go find him first, and leave before he spots me? )

Hina: (Hmm… Wonder if that’s better? I don’t really understand myself.)

———————————————

Hina: Oh, sorry. I got caught up in my… thoughts.

Kashu: …

Hina: …!?

Hina: K-Kashu-sensei… H-Hello.

Kashu: …

Kashu: Hello, how are you doing?

Kashu: Goodbye then.

Hina: Wait, huh…? That’s it?

Hina: (Something seems off about him… I don’t think I’ve ever seen him that peeved.)

Hina: (Although I don’t really understand him half the time, he always seemed to be enjoying himself, and he’s always yapping on and on about his experiments.)

Hina: Um… D-Did something happen? Are you mad? But, why are you mad…?

Hina: (His attitude didn’t change even after I yelled at him previously.)

Hina: (It would make sense if he’d reacted like this last time, but I don’t think that’s the reason why he’s mad now. Kuzuha-sensei also said that there wasn’t anything he could do…)

Hina: Did something happen while I was absent from school?

Hina: But what could have made such an impact on him? I don’t understand…

Hina: (Hmm… Isn’t it weird for him to be so mad when I’m the one who’s supposed to be angry here?)

Hina: (But… I suppose there’s not much I can do either, but I’m so very curious…)

What should I do?

⊳Choice: Go see Kashu-sensei ⊳Choice: Go participate in Club Activities  

[ollieofthebeholder]

And If Thou Wilt, Forget: a TMA fanfic

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] || Also on AO3 and my personal website

Chapter 9: And what you spurn, I'll wear

The weather for the week was bitterly cold, but mostly clear. Once Gerry had a day to recover, they ventured out into the streets of Chicago to see the sights. Gerry had never done the tourist thing—even when he’d gone to Italy to get out of the country for a bit after getting out of prison, he’d been trying to avoid people and therefore hadn’t done much more than hide in out of the way cafés and bookstores, and most of the time when he traveled it was with a purpose. Tim, the veteran of dozens of family vacations and solo trips, was determined to give him the full experience, even if it did have the specter of the upcoming appointment looming over it. He didn’t exactly plan it down to the minute, but he had a few destinations in mind, and he was determined they would hit as many as they could.

Gerry went along willingly. His breakdown in the shower seemed to have done him some good—which was more or less what Tim had expected, God knew he needed to let himself have emotions sometimes—and he seemed calmer, lighter even, as they walked or taxied around the city to various can’t-miss destinations. They visited the Art Institute of Chicago, where Gerry gave Tim the history of almost every single painting and waxed surprisingly poetic about the artistic techniques and Tim surprised him by quietly singing a song from a musical that was loosely inspired by one of them, and the Field Museum, where they had a lighthearted debate over whether SUE could have been an avatar of one of the Fears in life. They strolled the Riverwalk, visited a jazz club that was apparently world-famous, and dined at restaurants Tim had solicited recommendations to from the staff, stressing as he did so that they wanted to try where the locals ate, not where the tourists went. They even managed—somehow—to get tickets to a game played between the local team and a team called the Buccaneers, and while neither of them understood the rules to American football, they agreed it had been worth the visit, if only for the experience. An usher, overhearing their conversation, had suggested they come back in the spring to see a baseball game, and they’d politely agreed to try, even though both of them doubted they would make it.

The stress had returned the morning of Gerry’s follow-up appointment, and Tim had simply held his hand on the taxi ride to the hospital, but in the end there was nothing to worry about. Dr. Greene removed the stitches and declared that Gerry was healing remarkably well. He asked a few questions about Gerry’s pain level, decided he could finish up the current round of medications and not need to renew them, and released him with a reminder to follow up with “your regular doctor” when he got back to London. Another admonition from Debbie—who had, as she promised, popped in to say hello—about staying away from the cigarettes, and they were free to go.

“So I guess we’re heading to—what’s it called—O’Hare, then?” Gerry asked as they stepped out of the front doors into the biting cold. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, releasing a puff of steam. “Heigh-ho and off for home?”

Tim was reaching for his phone when a nearby church tower began chiming, tolling the hour. He counted the strokes, then shook his head. “Well, we missed checkout for today, anyway, so I guess we’re leaving tomorrow. And no, we’re heading to Union Station.”

“Why? You’re still on about me not flying for a bit?”

“For another five weeks, yeah. So not until after Christmas at the earliest. And anyway…” Tim hesitated. They hadn’t actually discussed what came next. “Come on. I was saving this one for today because I thought we’d need a bit more time. We can talk there.”

Gerry sighed tolerantly, but followed along without argument. Tim knew that the only reason he was getting away with this was that Gerry trusted him absolutely—that he knew Tim would explain everything, and that if he wasn’t saying it now, it was for a very good reason. And it was—primarily that standing in front of the hospital wasn’t the place to talk about things like this, but also that he wanted to get at least a start on a good day before they discussed it.

Their destination was the Navy Pier, which, according to the concierge at the hotel, was just one of those places you had to visit when you went to Chicago. Tim had picked up a brochure from the lobby, but he hadn’t done much more than skim it, so he wasn’t entirely sure what to expect other than water of some kind. It turned out to not be that different from Brighton Pier, save that Tim couldn’t see an arcade of any kind. Still, there were a number of rides, including a giant wheel looming over the space, plus shops and restaurants, the tantalizing odors mingling pleasantly in the air. Even as cold as it was, and even though it was the middle of the day on a Monday, the place was still bustling. Beyond the crowd they could just make out the masts of a tall ship, probably some kind of reenactment or museum, as well as a more modern boat steaming back to dock. Past that was a vast, sparkling world of water.

“Huh,” Gerry said, his nostrils flaring as he sniffed the air. “I can’t smell the sea from here.” He paused, then added, “Actually, I thought Illinois was landlocked.”

“That’s not the sea. It’s Lake Michigan,” Tim told him. “It’s one of the Great Lakes, and the only one that’s fully in the United States instead of being shared with Canada. Second-largest by volume, third-largest by surface area. Anyway, it’s a freshwater lake, so you wouldn’t smell any salt.”

“Seriously, how do you know that?”

“It’s in all those tourist guides in the hotel lobby. I had to do something to keep myself sane when they kicked me out of your hospital room, and I didn’t bring any books with me.” Tim looped his arm through Gerry’s. “Where do you want to start? We’ve got all day.”

Gerry gazed up thoughtfully at the wheel. “Think that’s too high for my cracked brain to handle?”

Tim grinned. Perfect. “Please. Our hotel room is probably further up than that. C’mon.”

They took their time getting to the wheel, which they really didn’t have much of a choice about; a large horde of children, evidently a school group of some kind, got in their way and they had to work to avoid them—and avoid getting trampled by them. At last, however, they made it to the ticket booth, joined the queue, waited patiently, and eventually climbed into a bucket. The attendant lowered the bar onto their lap, and they were off.

To his credit, Gerry waited until they had risen slightly and the car had stopped briefly, presumably to let the next set of riders on, before he turned to Tim. “So. What’s the plan? I assume you have one. We can’t exactly get to London without flying.”

“We’re not going to London.” Tim patted his coat and hoped Gerry could hear the muffled thunk as he hit the folio Gertrude had given him. He was afraid to leave it in the hotel room. Maybe Gertrude’s paranoia was rubbing off on him a bit. “Not for a while yet, anyway. Gertrude told me before she left that she wants us to keep looking for those answers you two were after. We’re going to Pittsburgh. She left me her notes on what she was planning to do when she got there, and she’s gone back to London herself. We’re going to pick up where she—where you—left off, and…go from there.”

Gerry blinked, then clutched at the bar as the car got moving again. “She trusts us that much?”

“Yeah. She does. Not just to continue the work, but to figure out where to go after, which tells me she doesn’t think we’ll be coming back to London any time soon. I can’t imagine this will take that much longer, you guys had already been gone five months when she called me out here, but I guess we’ll have to wait and see.”

“I guess so.” Gerry slid his arm around Tim’s shoulders. “Just…it’s been two weeks. I’m worried that whatever we’re supposed to be finding…what if the trail’s gone cold? What if we’ve lost the chance?”

Tim shrugged and leaned into Gerry’s side. “Gertrude’s not stupid. She had to have known we’d be stuck here a bit. Even said I would ‘officially be on leave’ until we set off for Pittsburgh. If it was really time-sensitive, I don’t think she’d have told us it could wait. She’d have kept going, waited until I called to say we were ready to leave Chicago, and told us where to either meet her or pick up the trail, and then gone back to London.”

“Good point, as always,” Gerry admitted. “Okay. If you’re sure…”

“I’m sure.”

“Then I guess it’s on to Pittsburgh tomorrow night.”

The whole trip on the wheel, including a spectacular view of the city and lake when they stopped for a few moments at the apex, lasted about seven minutes, and the sparkle in Gerry’s eyes told Tim he’d enjoyed himself. They walked the Pier hand in hand, trying a few more of the rides that appealed to them and browsing the shops. The river cruises had apparently stopped for the winter, but they got drinks, sat on the end of the pier, and watched the sunset together. Once the lights came on around them, they made their way off the pier in search of dinner, then went back to the hotel. Gerry, who was after all still recovering, fell asleep almost immediately with one arm flung across Tim, but Tim stayed up a bit longer with his laptop. He booked two train tickets to Pittsburgh, found another extended stay hotel in the same chain as the one they were in now—since it was a national chain, he’d signed up for a rewards membership, figuring it would probably help in the long run if they were in the country for a while—and reserved their room, then forwarded the information to Gertrude.

Somehow, even though it was well past midnight in London, he wasn’t surprised when he got an email from her almost immediately, welcoming him back to work and telling him to be careful.

They checked out the next morning. As they stepped out into the sunlight, Tim turned to Gerry. “We don’t have to be to the station until after five. There’s only one train out of Chicago and it doesn’t leave until five after six. How do you want to spend the day?”

Gerry actually smiled mischievously. “Funny you should mention that. There is one thing I’d really like to do.” He took Tim’s hand. “Come on. We can stop at the station on the way and check our bags for the day so we don’t have to carry them around.”

Tim was thrilled to see Gerry looking so…normal. He’d have done anything he asked at that point.

They duly paid twenty dollars to have their bags stored, and then Gerry led Tim out into the streets. He’d evidently gotten directions from somewhere to…wherever they were going…or else he was making a pretty damn good guess. Either way, they stopped along the way for breakfast, then took a leisurely stroll along the streets until they reached an open park in the middle of the city, labeled Millennium Park.

“I can get behind this,” Tim said, smiling at the sign. “Love a good bit of green space. Even if it’s mostly white now.” It had evidently snowed in the night; the grass sparkled, even in the low light from the overcast sky, with an icy crust.

“Just wait,” Gerry promised. “There’s something here I really think you’ll like.” He paused, then added thoughtfully, “Not sure why. It just seems like your thing.”

“Okay, now I’m intrigued.”

They ambled through the park. A lot of people seemed to be heading in one particular direction. Tim found out why when they emerged on a large plaza and discovered an enormous sculpture that could only be described as a mirrored bean. He blinked. “What the hell is that?”

“You don’t know?” Gerry said. His tone was incredulous, but there was a teasing grin tugging at one corner of his mouth.

“I don’t know everything in the world. Just the important stuff,” Tim shot back, making Gerry laugh. “Hang on, there’s a sign.”

The sculpture turned out to be called Cloud Gate. Tim had never heard of it before, but he was surprised that he recognized the artist, Anish Kapoor. He turned to point this out to Gerry, then noticed the look on his face as he stared at the artwork. Instantly on edge, he asked, “What? What is it?”

“Just…look at it,” Gerry murmured, tearing his eyes away and staring at the ground. “Tell me if I’m imagining things.”

Tim looked. Cloud Gate’s reflective surface was mostly flat matte clouds, the day being so overcast, although the vague impressions of the various tourists and visitors clustered under it taking pictures were much in evidence. He was about to ask for clarification when he found his gaze drawn to the inner arch of the shape. Two reflections seemed to cross, and for just a moment, he felt disorientated and…sideways. As though Cloud Gate was showing him the real world and he was the reflection.

A reflection turned, and seemed to make eye contact with him. Tim quickly cut his eyes away and stared at his and Gerry’s joined hands until the weird almost vertigo and headache dissipated. He slowly loosened his grip; he was squeezing so hard that his finger had puffed up and was straining at the ring beneath the gloves, so he had to be hurting Gerry.

“No,” he told him. “I don’t think you’re imagining things. I should’ve guessed from Kapoor’s other works that he’s at least seen the Spiral.”

“Yeah.” Gerry took a deep breath and tightened his hand around Tim’s, then tugged. “Come on. This isn’t what I wanted to bring you here for anyway.”

Tim followed without too much complaint. The sculpture wasn’t super involved with the Spiral; it was just that Kapoor had obviously been Marked by it, and he’d just as obviously put a bit of it into his work—wasn’t it said that all great artists put a bit of themselves into their art? Still, he made a mental note to mention it to Gertrude. If it was going to be used in a ritual, she’d probably like to be aware of it.

His mood lifted the further they got from the plaza where the sculpture was, and from the way Gerry straightened, his obviously had as well. They continued ambling through the park for a while, and then Gerry let out a soft, satisfied-sounding ah and quickened his steps. “There it is. Come on.”

Laughing, Tim picked up the pace, letting Gerry drag him forward. He laughed even harder when he realized what Gerry wanted him to see. A low fence with clear plastic set in the gaps of the frame surrounded a large, flat area that had been turned into an ice skating rink. A booth off to one side proclaimed that skates were available for rent.

“You want to go ice skating?” he asked, unexpectedly delighted.

“Mostly I want to see you ice skating, but yeah, I’ll get out there with you.” Gerry grinned at him. “So you do like the idea?”

“I love it.” Tim tugged Gerry around and kissed him.

It turned out that while the rink was free, they were supposed to reserve a time, and the first skate was completely booked. Tim pulled out his phone and booked them both for one o’clock, and they found a bench where they could sit and watch the skaters. It proved to be a pretty good mix of what Tim took to be university students, older folks who were probably past retirement age, and parents with small children likely too young for school. Some of the littlest ones were leaning on props shaped like penguins to keep themselves from falling face-first on the ice. Tim couldn’t help but grin as he watched them stumble around the ice.

“Too bad they don’t have those in adult sizes,” Gerry said dryly, watching a tiny child of indeterminate gender that seemed to be mostly comprised of snowsuit and hat. “I am definitely going to be terrible at this.”

“Hey, don’t sell yourself short. You might be surprised.” Tim nudged him. “Also, this might be a good time to tell you I’ve never done this either.”

“What, never?” Gerry’s eyebrows shot up.

“No, never. Been skiing a few times, snowshoeing once or twice, and one year Danny talked me into trying snowboarding, but I’ve never done ice skating.”

“Well, that’s more than I’ve done, so you’re up on me there.”

“Good. Then we can look like idiots together.” Tim dodged Gerry’s playful swipe and put his arm around his shoulders. “It’ll be fun. You’ll see.”

“I know.” Gerry leaned his head on Tim’s shoulder.

They got up when the rink stewards ordered the current crowd off the ice, went over to the booth, and rented their skates. It probably should have been at least a little embarrassing for the pack of schoolchildren on some kind of field trip to almost literally skate circles around them, but Tim was too busy laughing and holding onto Gerry to keep himself from falling over while Gerry did the same thing with him to care. Somehow, they managed to keep from actually tumbling to the ground. His legs were aching well before their hour was up, but he didn’t want to stop, not while Gerry was still going strong. He kept powering his way around the rink, but silently, he thanked God that they would have at least three or four hours to make it to the train station from here. It might have only been about a twenty-minute walk, but he was probably going to need at least a short rest first.

Finally, the rink stewards called that time was up. The two of them stumbled off the ice, nearly fell when they hit solid ground, and wobbled over to the bench where they’d left their shoes to get the skates off.

Gerry groaned, rubbing at his calves. “You’re a machine, you know that? I was having a hell of a time keeping up with you.”

“What? Oh, no.” Tim started giggling. He couldn’t help it. “I thought I was keeping up with you!”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Gerry threw his head back and laughed, too.

It did, at least, give them time to recover, so they were a bit steadier on their feet when they finally got their boots laced back up and returned the skates. Still, they took their time getting back to Union Station. Retrieving their bags was easy, and they still had time to grab a bite to eat before heading to the platform. Once there, Gerry hesitated for just a minute, then led Tim purposefully over to one of the benches.

“Strategic view of the incoming train?” Tim asked lightly. He glanced at the arrival board. They still had close to an hour before their train pulled in.

“Something like that.” Gerry pointed to the bench on the extreme opposite end of the platform. “Did Gertrude tell you we’d made it all the way to the station before she took me to the hospital?”

“No.” Tim’s stomach flipped. “You didn’t tell her you weren’t feeling well?”

“They were just headaches. Never really thought anything of it. And it didn’t occur to me that I was having seizures with them—”

“Gerry!”

“It didn’t! I just…thought the pain was so bad I was twitching to make it stop.” Gerry sighed. “Anyway, I’m not sure Gertrude really noticed at first either, but something suddenly made her pay more attention, and the next thing I knew we were on our way to the hospital.”

“There was some supposedly inspiring news story going around about a basketball game that got moved up because one of the players is dying of brain cancer and really wanted to play before she died,” Tim said quietly. “It got her worrying. Which, you know Gertrude, just irritated her.”

“Yeah, God forbid anyone knows she cares.” Gerry sighed. “Still. I’m glad she did. And I’m really glad she called you, mate. I couldn’t have got through this without you.”

Tim put his arm around Gerry’s shoulders, then took his hand with the other and kissed his knuckles. “I’m glad she called me, too. There’s nowhere else I’d want to be.”

Gerry leaned his head on Tim’s shoulder, and they sat in silence, listening to the bustle of the station around them. Tim was peripherally aware of a woman glaring disapprovingly at them from further along the platform, but he ignored her. He’d been out and proud as bisexual since he was thirteen and he had the scars to prove it, and if he was likely to let the opinions of others bother him he wouldn’t have lasted this long. Besides, he’d just come damn close to losing Gerry. However they defined their relationship, he was the most important person in Tim’s life, and he wanted as much reassurance as he could get that he was alive and here. Other people could fucking deal with that.

Finally, Gerry spoke quietly. “What’s the plan when we get to Pittsburgh?”

“There’s something Gertrude wants us to check in the Hall of Records.” Tim patted his coat again. “It’s all in here. We can go over it on the train.”

“You don’t want to wait until we get there?”

“Train gets in at five in the morning. We can’t get into the hotel until the afternoon. And Thursday is some kind of government holiday, apparently, so everything will be closed until Monday, and they might close early tomorrow. Rather at least get started than hit a brick wall and get delayed entirely another week.”

“Fair enough,” Gerry admitted. “Leave it to the Americans to decide to add a holiday in the middle of November for no damn reason. What is it, anyway?”

Tim snorted. “They call it Thanksgiving. It’s a whole day to celebrate turkey and football.”

“Oh, joy. I suppose there’s a football team where we’re going? Seems like everyone has a football team.”

“Yeah, the Steelers, I think. But they’re not playing until Sunday.” Tim smirked down at Gerry. “And I’m not particularly interested in going to another game.”

“Good,” Gerry replied. “So we’ll get what answers we can tomorrow, hang around until Monday if we need to, and get out of town as soon as possible?”

“That’s the plan.” A low whistle sounded in the distance, and Tim glanced down the track. “Aha, our chariot approaches. Come, my prince, let us fly.”

“If this train starts flying, I’m setting it on fire.” Gerry bent to retrieve his bag.

“Nah, the Heartland Flyer operates in Texas.” Tim dodged Gerry’s halfhearted swipe and caught his hand, laughing. “C’mon. Maybe boarding first won’t get us to Pittsburgh any faster, but at least we’ve got a better chance of getting good seats. God only knows how many people are going to be taking this trip home for the holidays. And then once we’re settled, we can look at this damn notebook and figure out what’s what.”

“Sounds good.” Gerry squeezed Tim’s hand. “Let’s get going, then.”

[captainlunaxmen]

The Lady and the Lord

Chapter 4

Eddie munson x fem!reader

This is a repost since the old blog doesn't work anymore. 🥰

Chapter summary: some plans are made, the reader goes to check on Eddie and, unfortunately, it seems to be Max's time.

Chapter warnings: spoiler season 4, mention of harassing.

Soon after Robin and Nancy arrived and Max got out of.. trance.

She told us about hearing a voice calling her name and seeing a grandfather clock.

"It was here. RIght here" She says pointing her torch to a wall in the hallway.

"A grandfather clock?" Robin asks.

"It was so real. And then when I got closer, suddenly I just.. I woke up." She explains.

"It was like she was in a trance or something" Dustin adds.

"Just like Eddie said" I say.

Max turns to look at us. Scared.

"That's not even the bad part"

With that she lead us back to Ms Kelly's office showing us Chrissy's and Fred's file.

"Fred and Chrissy, they both came to Ms Kelly for help. They both were having headaches, bad headaches that wouldn't go away. And then..then the nightmares. Trouble sleeping. They'd wake up in a cold sweat. Then they started seeing things. Bad things. From their past. These visions... they just, they kept on getting worse and worse, until eventually...everything ended" Max explains, fear dominating his voice.

I don't like where this is going..

"Vecna's curse" Robin says.

Yeah... I don't like where this is going.

"Chrissy's headaches started a week ago. Fred's, six days ago. I've been having them for five days."

Fuck... I feel my stomach turning, this can't be happening.

"I don't know how long I have. All I know is that, for Fred and Chrissy, they both died less than 24 hours after their first vision. And I just saw that goddamn clock, so..." She's breaths shakily, tears threatening to fall from her eyes. "Looks like I'm gonna die tomorrow."

Before any of us could say something, a loud noise catches our attention.

We all look at each other and Steve take charges.

"Stay here" he tells us walking to the door, grabbing what I think is a long lamp and head out of the office.

We obviously follow him out, carefully walking behind him.

We hear nother noise, like doors opening or something, then footsteps approaching, quickly.

Steve get ready to attack when from the corner a very agitated Lucas appears and they all yell.

"It's me" Lucas exclaims.

"Jesus! What's wrong with you Sinclair?" Steve yells back, catching his breath.

"I'm sorry"

"I could've taken you out with this lamp!"

"Sorry guys, sorry" He pants. "I was... I was biking for eight miles... just.. give me a second.. shit"

We all look at him confused.

"We've got a code red." He finally say, still panting.

"What?"

Lucas then walks to Dustin.

"Dustin, I've been with Jason, Patrick and Andy, and they've gone totally off the rails." He starts talking, fast "They're trying to capture Eddie, and they think you know where he is. You're in terrible danger"

"Fucking dickheads" I mutter.

"Yeah" Robin agrees.

"All right. Yeah, that definitely sucks, but we've got bigger problems than Jason right now" Dustin tells him, then turns to look at Max, Lucas does the same worried and confused at the same time.

We decided it's better to just go to Nancy's house and think of something to do.

I offered to go check on Eddie before heading to Nancy's... now I'm kinda regretting it.. on one hand I'm nervous to be alone again with Eddie, even if we get along, on the other hand I'm worried about Max and I don't want to leave her, but I can't back away now.

"Eddie?" I whisper, hoping he can hear me and won't be scared someone actually caught him.

"Eddie? It's Y/n." I open the boathouse door. "I brought you something"

I scan the room and I see him slowly emerging from under the tarp, the sight makes me giggle.

"Is that comfortable enough for you, my lord?" I ask with a giggle.

"Oh? That? Oh yeah, 5 starts out of 5, definitely" he says, a smile slowly appears on his face.

"Here" I walk closer to him handing him my Walkman and some cassettes. "To... keep your mind busy."

He looks at me smiling, genuinely.

"It helps me to distract myself.. if you want.." I shyly say.

He reach out and grabs the Walkman from my hand. Our hands slightly touching for only a moment, but it was enough... just enough.

"Thanks" he says checking my cassettes, with a grin. "Let's see what m'lady listens to"

"Are you going to judge me?" I joke.

"Oh, definitely" he says sitting down.

"Don't be too mean" I sit down with him.

All my nervousness thrown out of the window, completely disappeared.

"Aahh.. look at this. The Beatles, nice! you're into the classics.. that's good" he says impressed.

"My grandmother left her old vinyls at home so.. " I shrug.

"Bowie... not my favourite, but still a good one" he keeps looking.

"Mhmm" I hold back a chuckle.

"Oh...but... look..at..these..." he says, a smirk on his face. "We got: Metallica, oh! Mötley Crüe, Iron Maiden! Judas Priest and... Dio. Quite loud bands for someone as quiet"

"Yeah.. I guess"

"Hey, I'm not judging... far from it" he chuckles.

"Well.. you're not the only freak in town" I smile at him.

"But you're the only beautiful one" he winks.

He said that last part in a whispers.

"I.. you... you need to stop doing that" I stutter out looking away from him.

"Why? It gets you all flustered and cute.. I can't help myself" he says simply.

I'm glad he's smiling, though, even if it is at my expense.

I playfully roll my eyes.

"You're terrible"

"I've been called worse, you need to improve your game, m'lady" he teases, fully turning to look at me.

"Gotta need to teach me then, my lord" I tease back.

"Anything for you" he smiles wickedly.

"Anything? Careful, I just might take advantage of that." I say.

"Fine by me" he shrugs. "Are... are we flirting right now?" That smirk back on his lips.

I widen my eyes, biting my lips instinctively.

"I... I... I don't know.." I let out a nervous chuckle looking away.

He just smiles, probably enjoying my flustered face, but then he change the subject.

"Can I ask you something?" He asks me.

"Sure.." I say, still a bit flustered.

"Why.. why are you helping me?" He asks, all of a sudden looking away, feeling not so confident anymore.

"Well, we just-"

"Not them.. why are you helping me?" He asks again.

That catches off guard.

I look at him, he's fidgeting with his hands, nervously.

"Do you remember when we got paired up for history? Last year.. more or less."

He nods. "How could I forget?"

"Remember when we were at the library and Jessica Perry basically threw her orange juice, or whatever shut she was drinking, on me?" I ask him.

"She thought you had slept with her boyfriend for some reason.." he laughs at the absurdity of that situation.

"Yeah" I laugh too "I simply had to deliver his graded paper from math, that was it... the professor forced me since I was the last one in class when she remembered.." I roll my eyes.

"That's why I always run right out of class as soon as the bell rings"

"Oh I know" I say "anyway... I was soaked and you offered your leather jacket to shield me from the rain outside, even if it was the only thing you had to protect yourself, and even if it would mean having your jacket all sticky"

He just looks at me, not saying anything.

"My point is... you offered your jacket and you offered to drive me home, even if we live on the opposite side of town. Someone as kind as you doesn't deserve... this shit"

He smiled embarrassed and lets out a nervous laugh.

"You really think that? But... I might've changed and gone crazy" he suggests.

"Well, if you don't believe me.. here's my second reason: Dustin just doesn't become attached to evil souls.." I smile at him and he looks surprised, relieved.

"Thank you, m'lady" he says.

"You're welcome, my lord"

We just look at each other, he looks at me with affection and gratitude. He reach out to grab my hand but Dustin's voice stops him.

"Y/n do you copy?"

Dustin...

"Sorry" I tell Eddie, who just sighs.

"What a timing, Henderson" I hear him mutter.

"Yeah, I copy. What's up?" I ask grabbing the radio Dustin gave me before leaving.

"Are you coming back?"

"Steve... you know I'm a grown-up? Right?" I chuckle.

"I don't care, honey, it's dangerous and.. and" he starts.

"Stevie, Stevie.. I'm coming back soon, I promise. Calm down... jesus, you're worse than any mother" I tell him "I'm coming, bye"

And I put away the radio not waiting for an answer.

"Mommy wants you home, uh?" Eddie says.

"Apparently.." I roll my eyes.

"Okay" he says, a disappointed smile on his face.

"I'm.. I'm sorry." I look at him "I really am"

"It's cool, really, it's Harrington being a pain in the ass" he tries to laugh it off.

"Yeah" I laugh. "I'll come back as soon as I can.. I promise"

"You promise?" He asks, regaining that playful smile.

"Of course...you got my Walkman there" I say playfully, pointing at my Walkman.

"Right, gotta have to give it back at some point I guess" he chuckles.

"Definitely" I give him a smile before heading to the door.

"Wait" he says walking up to me. "Be careful out there."

He's looking at me with the sweetest smile and eyes I've ever seen. I could literally melt on the spot.

"Sure" I smile back.

I turn, open the door and walk out, before I can close the door behind me, he stops me once more.

"And.. by the way.. we were definitely flirting" he winks and closes the door.

"Oh my god" I mutter, feeling completely speechless.

"How's Eddie?" Dustin asks as soon as I enter the Wheeler's basement.

"He's... he's fine, I cheered him up and gave him my Walkman so he'll... uh.. keep his mind busy somehow" I tell him.

"You... cheered him up?" Steve looks at me surprised.

"Yeah.. I mean he was laughing at some point so.. I guess" I say looking everywhere but them.

"What did I miss? You guys are together or something?" Lucas asks, visibly confused.

"No.. no" I answer.

"We're sure Eddie has a thing for her, but she doesn't want to believe us" Dustin points out.

I just roll my eyes sitting beside Lucas and looking at what seems some old papers.

"What's this?" I ask starting to reading the titles.

"Robin and Nancy's found these articles about Victor Creel" Dustin answers.

Cool.

"Okay, be honest. Uh..you guys understand any of this?" Steve questions, he was already reading one when I came in.

"No"

"Pretty straightforward" Dustin states.

"Oh straightforward, really?" Steve raises his eyebrows at him.

"What's confusing to you?" Dustin's being a know-it-all and Steve being irritated by it is my favourite thing in the world, but I try to hold back a giggle.

"So far, everyone Vecna has cursed died, except for this old Victor Creel dude Nancy found. He's the only known survivor. If anyone knows how to beat this creature, it's him" Dustin keeps explaining.

"Well... that makes sense... the killing mode is the same, according to what's written here" I comment pointing at the papers.

"Yeah, but that's assuming he was cursed, Henderson, which we don't even know. How can Vecna have existed in the '50s? It doesn't make sense" He talks to himself more than to us at this point.

"As far as we know, Eleven didn't create the Upside Down. She opened a gate to it. The Upside Down has probably been around for thousands of years. Millions. I wouldn't be surprised if it predated the dinosaurs." Dustin responds.

"Dinosaurs? What are we-"

"Okay" Lucas chimed in "but if a gate didn't exist in the '50s, how did Vecna get through?"

"And how's getting through... now?" I ask.

"And why now?" Lucas adds.

"And why then? He just pops out in the '50s, kills one family, and he's like, 'Oh I'm good'. And poof, he just disappears. Just...gone? Only to return 30 years later and start killing some random teens? No, I don't buy it." Steve rambles then exhales deeply. "Straightforward, my ass. You know, honestly, Henderson, a little humility every now and then, it wouldn't hurt you"

"Ooh mommy's mad" I mutter to Lucas, but Steve apparently heard me because he glares at me but he eventually sits down too.

I just notice.. Max sitting at a desk writing something. I don't think I could even imagine what she's thinking.

"Any idea what she's writing?" Dustin asks.

"I don't know" I whisper and Lucas only shrugs.

"Did she sleep?" I ask.

"I mean, would you?" Lucas questions back at me.

We're gonna find a way.. I know. We have to.

My thoughts are interrupted by a door violently opening and the arrival of Nancy and Robin.

"Okay so.." Nancy starts" We have a plan"

"Great"

"So, thanks to Nancy's minions, we are now rock-star psychology students at the University of Notre Dame." Robin explains.

"I'm now Ruth"

"And I'm Rose"

"Nice GPA" Dustin comments looking at 'Ruth' file.

"So we called Pennhurst Asylum, told them we'd like to speak with Victor Creel for a thesis we're co-writing on paranoid schizophrenics-" Nancy explains.

"To which they said no" Robin quickly adds.

"But we landed a three o'clock with the director" Nancy continues.

"Now all we have to do is charm him and convince him to let us talk to Victor" Robin states, simply as breathing.

"Then maybe we can rid Max of this curse"

"Sounds like a plan" I say.

"About that. We've been doing our Victor Creel homework, and uh... we got some questions" Steve speaks.

"Lots of questions" Lucas adds.

"So do we. Hopefully, Victor has the answers" Nancy says with a sigh.

"Wait.. wait... wait.. wait a second. Uh... Where's mine?" Steve asks with a nervous chuckle looking around.

"Me and Nancy are going." Robin informs him.

"What? Why?" Steve is...unsurprisingly surprised he wasn't included in the plan.

"Because being three would definitely make them suspicious" Nancy say standing up and heading upstairs.

"Also, me and Nancy found out about him so.. it's fair" Robin basically mocks him.

"Wha-? C'mon.. Nance!" He starts to run upstairs to catch up on Nancy.

"What's up with him?" Robin asks me, looking at me with an amused smile.

"He has... like.. the protector syndrome.. or-" I start.

"He still has a thing for her" Dustin chimes in and I nod.

"Ooh" She realises. "Also.. How's Eddie?" She asks.

"Oh he's good, he-" I interrupt myself when I see her teasing smile. "What are you smiling at?"

"Robin!" Nancy calls for her from upstairs.

"Gotta go" and she runs upstairs too.

"Wait.. Robi-... fuck" I sigh and close my eyes in frustration.

When I feel observed, I open my eyes seeing Lucas and Dustin looking at me.

"What?" I ask them, rather annoyed.

"Oh nothing... just... I'm right" Dustin states proudly.

"What about humility?" I ask him, rhetorically.

"Well even I know Eddie has a thing for you" Lucas chimes in.

"He does not"I groan. "Guys, c'mon it's a way to distract himself. No big deal"

"You gotta start to believe someone could actually like you. You're cool, you're a badass, Y/n. You fight monsters." Dustin tries to convince me.

"Yeah but I can't say fuck off to a dickhead who's groping me" I blurt out without thinking.

Lucas looks at me apologetically, while Dustin is speechless.

"What?" He almost shouts, his jaw clenching.

"Don't worry about it, it's... it's nothing" I shake my head trying to dismiss the thing, but Dustin is not one to let something like this go this easily.

"Who was it?" He asks.

"No o-"

"Andy, from the team" Lucas cuts me off answering Dustin.

"Does Steve know?"

I shake my head.

"He just saw him insisting on taking me to a party.. and stopped him right away" I tell him.

"You didn't tell Steve what happened in the gym?" Lucas asks.

"What about the gym?"

Fuck. I didn't hear Steve coming back in the basement. Nancy and Robin must've left.

"Weren't you begging Nancy to take you with them?" I joke, trying to change the subject.

"What about the gym?" He repeats his question, more sternly and crossing his arms.

I deeply sigh, looking at Lucas giving him permission to tell Steve what happened.

"Well... there were basketball practice and she-" Lucas starts, but is cut off by Steve.

"I didn't ask you." He looks at me "what. About. The gym?"

I look down at my rings playing with them, nervously.

"Fuck.." I mutter.

"I'm listening" he says cupping his ear towards me to show me that he was, indeed, listening.

"I had to take some pictures of the team practicing, for the paper. It was going all good, I was taking the photos and all. When I was preparing the camera for the next shots... this guy approached me.. he started by asking me about the pictures, he.. uh.. he got closer, to look at the camera and he suddenly whispered some.. some.. things. When I tried to get away, he... uh.." my feel my voice breaking a little.

"He grabbed her waist holding her, he wasn't letting her go until the bell rang" Lucas finishes for me, thankfully.

"Why didn't you tell me? Is he the same guy who invited you to the party?" He asks and I nod "I thought he was just insisting the other night... I'm so sorry, honey" Steve apologies.

"Stevie, you have nothing to be sorry for" I let out a little chuckle.

"It's Andy who should apologise" Dustin says and Steve nods.

"Yeah... I know.. can we please change subject.. we got bigger shit to worry about" I look at all of them "please?" I repeat.

"Fine.. but this is not over" Steve sweetly tells me, sitting beside me.

I really hope Nancy and Robin find some answers, we need them. Now more than ever.

I really can't even think about losing Max, she's literally the sister I never had.. and I'd punch myself so hard for realising it now.

"Stop staring" I whisper at the boys.

I know they're worried sick, but staring at her won't help.

"I already know they're staring" Max all of sudden answers me.

"What, sorry?"

"You said you needed something?"

"Just hanging out"

They all try to act casual, failing miserably. I chuckle at them.

"How you think your eyes boring into the back of my head is protecting me from Vecna, I don't know" she says gathering something and standing up to walk to us.

He stops before us, the boys keep pretending to do anything else, so I playfully roll of my eye looking at her.

"You can look at me now" she tells them.

"Thank you, sorry"

"Sorry" They all say.

Max looks at the envelopes she has in her hands, and after letting out a small sigh she hends them to us.

"For you" she hands one to Dustin. "For you" one to Steve. "For you" one to me. "And, uh... For you" she hands the last one to Lucas.

"Oh, and, uh... give these to Mike, El and Will. If you can ever get a hold of them again."

Steve and Dustin start to open the letter, but Max quickly stops them.

"What are you doing. No, don't. That's not for now. Don't open it now."

"No? Okay" Dustin mutters. "I'm sorry, what is this?"

"It's, uh...it's a fail-safe. For after. If things don't work out." She says, defeat in her voice.

"Wait, whoa. Max, things are gonna work out" Lucas tries to reassure her.

"No!" She stops him "no, I don't need you to reassure me and tell me it's all gonna work out. People have been telling me that my entire life and it's almost never true. It's never true. I mean, of course this asshole curses me. Should've seen that one coming"

I can see the anger, the sadness... the fear in his voice. It breaks my heart... fuck, if we ever find this Vecna I'm gonna kill him myself.

She then goes grab the radio from the table.

"If we go to east Hawkins, will this reach Pennhurst?" She asks.

"Of course" Dustin softly says.

"Why are we talking about East Hawkins?" Steve asks alarmed.

We all share a look that Steve's ready to stop

"No, no no no no"

We all convinced Steve to drive, obviously, he can't say no to us, especially after Max's threat of suing him.

We drove to Max's trailer so she could leave her letters to her mother, but when she cane back she was scared, terrified..

She's now by Billy's grave, reading her letter to him probably. We're waiting for her by the car.

"She better hurry" Steve says, annoyed only to hide how actually worried he is.

"C'mon Steve, it's the least we could do. Help her, support her as much as we can until we find a way to save her" I tell him.

"Hopefully soon" Lucas adds.

"Hopefully soon" I nod.

My leg is bouncing, I'm biting my nails as my eyes are fixed on Max.

"All right, it's been long enough" Steve gets out of the car, walking to Max.

"Steve, just give her some time." Lucas tries to hold him back.

"I have, all right, Sinclair? I'm calling it. If she wants to get a lawyer, she can" Steve replies.

"Steve!" I call him. I look at Dustin and Lucas and go to follow Steve.

"Max! Time to giddy up. Yeah? Max?.." he says.

I catch up with him and I see him shaking Max and calling her name, but I hear no answer from her.

"What's happening?" I ask, kneeling in front of her right away. "Max!"

"Wha-"

"It's like yesterday.. in ms Kelly's office..." I tell him, I widen my eyes. "Vecna"

"Wake up" Steve keeps trying clapping his hands to somehow catch her attention, no use.

"Fuck!" I swear. "GUYS!" I call them.

"Max, wake up! Wake up" Steve keeps repeating those words over and over hoping they might work anytime soon.

Lucas and Dustin arrive too and they too start to call Max, tell her to wake up.

Nothing works.. Nothing.

"Call Nancy and Robin! Go get them! Call Nancy and Robin! Go!" Steve screams at Dustin, who runs to the car ready to call the girls.

Let's hope they found an answer... let's Fucking hope.

"Max, Max c'mon, wake up. Wake up, please"

Fuck.

Fuck.

Fuck.

I feel my eyes tearing up, I can't lose her, we can't lose her.

I look over Dustin, standing on top of the car, probably to find a better signal or something.

Shit... they're not answering.

"Max! Get outta there" they keep shouting.

I can only stare at her eyes... her empty eyes.

"Max please.."

All of a sudden Dustin's back, with... Max's Walkman and cassettes...? What?

"What is this?" Lucas asks.

"What's her favourite song?" Dustin asks.

"Why?"

"Robin says if she liste ... it's too much to explain right now. What's her favourite song?" He shouts

I start to think of what's her favourite song.. I know I know it.

"Oh shit shit shit... I know I know... fuck" I mutter and everyone looks at me.

"Think!"

"I am thinking... fuck... Kate Bush...one Kate Bush song...fuck"

We look at her cassettes trying to find some of Kate Bush's songs.

I look at the list of songs.

"Cloudbusting... no.. the big sky... no shit...the morning fog... no.. Here! This one!" I hand Dustin the cassette and he immediately put it in the Walkman and put the headphones on Max.

We keep calling her name anyway, to wake her up somehow.

It seems like nothing's happening... then she starts to levitate.

Oh shit, Eddie said that is what happened to Chrissy right before... dying.

I instinctively hold Steve's hand, we don't stop calling her name, not once.

"C'mon Max" I whisper, this better fucking work.

Suddenly we hear her gasp and soon after she falls on the ground.

We all gather around her to check on her.

She's breathless, like she just stopped running. Lucas is hugging her tightly to him.

I let out a big sob and finally my tears fall down my cheeks.

"I thought we lost you" Lucas says to Max, still holding her close.

"I'm still...I'm still here" she tells him, grabbing onto him just as tightly.

"Shit" I mutter and Steve hugs me to him, rubbing my back.

"You're fine.. oh fuck you're fine" I say... well, more to make me realise that than anything.

We all stay there to catch our breath.

[skzhocomments]

I can read your smile - Choi Minho SHINee Fanfic - Chapter 5 - Make a wish

Story masterlist - please consult it for the summary of the story, trigger warnings etc.

Wattpad | AO3

Chapter 4 | Chapter 6

---

Chapter 5 - Make a wish

word count: 2.7k words

The end of the semester was quickly approaching, and with it the finals.

One night, a few days before a very important exam, Crystal knocked on Minho's door.

"Yea?" He asked, and she reluctantly opened it and went inside.

"Sorry for disturbing you..." she started, her eyes trailing off to Minho's desk where lots of books were scattered around. He looked stressed as well, there were dark eyes around his eyes and she hated having to disturb him, but she was in a crisis.

"No worries. What's up?" He brushed his hand through his hair and rubbed his eyes.

"I was reading about this concept but I can't figure out what it means..." she started, then quickly backtracked, being sure she's a pain in the ass. "But you must also be busy, so I'll just ask one of my classmates tomorrow-"

"Come here." He gestured her to come inside, for she was still in the doorframe holding onto her book protectively. "Show me."

She went in like a little child being scolded by their parents and handed him her book, pointing to the one concept she couldn't grasp.

"Why don't you sit down for a bit while I read it?" He smiled and urged her to sit down on the bed, and she obliged, watching him attentively read the paragraph she highlighted.

She didn't make any sounds, not wanting to disturb him as he carefully went through all the lines.

"Okay." He spoke after a few minutes. "What don't you understand from this?" He smiled, so Crystal began explaining the points she had trouble with. It was just a dumb thing probably, but no matter how many times she read it, she couldn't get anything from it.

Maybe she was just tired.

After hearing her out, Minho went with her through all the lines and they had a very proactive conversation on the subject that lasted for about an hour.

"Thank you so much, you're a lifesaver!" She spoke happily after their talk. She was glad to finally understand what she's been struggling with for two days now. Minho had provided her with real life examples as well, and it finally made sense.

"I'm glad I could help you. And I'm glad I actually remembered that stuff." He laughed.

"Do you want some tea?" Crystal smiled.

"I'd kill for a coffee actually."

"No." She smiled cheerfully. "It's too late for coffee, but I will make you a green tea. It has caffeine as well, but it's better for you."

"Okay." He chuckled. "Green tea it is."

There were these small things that Crystal did, which Minho noticed. After he took care of her when she was sick, they seemed to get a bit closer. She was more relaxed, and she started doing small acts of service for him. Every morning, she would leave out breakfast for him, either some fruit, or a sandwich. She woke up earlier than him somehow, even if he would set an alarm. Or she would grab something for him, a protein bar most times, when she went to the supermarket. Or she would wash his dishes if he didn't have enough time to do so between Uni and practice. Or she would do these small things when taking care of him – convince him to drink tea instead of coffee, texting him to grab a jacket before heading out because it's cold, or leaving an umbrella out for him to grab if it would rain that day.

"Would you also like something to eat?" Crystal asked. "Maybe a sandwich? I bought some ham earlier today."

"Sounds good." He smiled. There she was, once again, doing something for him. He wanted to do something for her as well, so he was glad she came and talked to him about what she didn't understand.

Crystal headed to the kitchen and made tea and sandwiches for the both of them, but she didn't want to disturb Minho any further, so she only brought him his share, leaving hers on the kitchen table.

"Thanks." He smiled. "Aren't you having any?"

"I am, but I left them in the kitchen."

"Well, bring them here!" He urged her. "Actually, sit down, I'll bring them!" Before she got the chance to protest, he got up from his chair and rushed to the kitchen, bringing back her plate and her tea mug.

She felt happy, seeing him do this for her. She never had someone get out of their comfort zone to make her comfortable, and Minho kept doing that. She enjoyed his presence and talking to him, and they used this window of opportunity to talk a bit more about their classes, and themselves.

"I struggle badly with motivation to keep studying." Minho confessed after a few minutes while eating his sandwich. "This break is much appreciated."

"Really? You seem like a very determined person, though." Crystal chuckled.

"It's just appearances. When I'm in here, studying on my own, my mind keeps wandering to anywhere else." He laughed.

"Oh no!" Crystal exclaimed. "Is it better when you study with other people?"

"Well, it's definitely more motivating to see someone else actually working. It makes me feel bad I'm not doing the same thing."

"It makes sense, honestly. That's why the library is such an altar of knowledge." She joked as well.

"Crystal, you know what?" He spoke after contemplating for a few seconds. "Why don't you bring your stuff here? Let's study together!"

"Would that help you?" She smiled.

"Definitely! You focus really well, it would surely help me."

"Okay." She stood up and went to her room, grabbing all her books and notebooks.

"Wait, I should bring you a chair so you can sit next to me." Minho wanted to stand up, but Crystal shook her head.

"No need. I'm mostly only reading, so I can sit down on the bed like earlier."

"You sure? Let me know if it gets uncomfortable. I don't want your back to hurt."

"It won't, no worries."

"If it does, you can lay down." Minho suggested.

Crystal nodded and opened her book, starting to read where she left off, and Minho followed suit. He turned his attention to his book, reluctantly opening it back up, and read a few paragraphs before losing focus.

Studying was hard, but he had to do it.

He looked at her – so immersed in what she was reading – and felt his motivation rising. If she could do it, so could he, and damn, she did it flawlessly. Even the things she couldn't understand, she had a great grasp. She was a hard worker.

He liked how disciplined she was when it came to studying, and to living life in general.

~

After about two hours of being immersed in his work, Minho yawned and glanced over at Crystal, who was fast asleep with her books next to her.

She must've fallen asleep while reading. Minho smiled and grabbed the books, placing them on his desk, then turned off the light.

He must've not been thinking clearly at that point. There were a lot of options he could've considered, such as waking Crystal up and urging her to go to her own room, or going there himself, or even going to the couch in the living room.

Still, he picked the most illogical option, and he slipped in bed next to her, making sure to keep a safe distance between their bodies. Making her uncomfortable was the last thing he wanted.

He closed his eyes and breathed in her scent. She smelled sweet, of vanilla. It was somehow comforting to hear her steady breathing, and he quickly fell into a deep slumber.

~

When Crystal woke up, confusion rushed all over her as she took in her surroundings.

She was still in Minho's room, his strong arm engulfing her waist in a hug from behind.

I must've fallen asleep. She thought and took a hold of Minho's arm and moved it from her carefully, so as to not wake him up.

Then, she stood up and looked at him and how peacefully he was sleeping, and she smiled to herself mindlessly.

She fell asleep on his bed by mistake, but he went to sleep next to her deliberately.

After staring at him for a few seconds too long, she went to the kitchen and got started on some breakfast for the both of them.

~

Minho opened his eyes and glanced in front of him, at the empty side of the bed.

Fuck. He cursed in his head. Crystal woke up before me. Again.

He sighed and got up as well, going to freshen up. He contemplated what explanation he should give her; why was he sleeping next to her?

However, when he went to the kitchen, she just welcomed him with a plate of freshly cooked eggs and bacon, and didn't ask him anything.

He didn't bring it up either.

"I'm so glad it's Sunday and I don't have to go to work." She said after they exchanged pleasantries and sat down at the kitchen table.

"I bet." He chuckled. "What are your plans today?"

"Besides studying, not much." She shrugged. "Yours?"

"I wanna hit the gym later."

"Sounds fun." She took a bite of her food. "I've never been to a gym before. What type of workouts are you doing?"

"Wait, never?!" He exclaimed. "Woah! Okay. First the sea, now the gym! Unbelievable! Wanna come with me?"

Crystal chuckled.

"What? Don't think I forgot about the sea. We'll go after the finals are over." He laughed.

"We will? Okay." She laughed as well, not taking him seriously.

"Yes, we will. But before then, wanna come with me to the gym today? I'll show you an easy workout."

"Hmmm." She contemplated. "How much is a membership?"

"Free for people who live in this building." He blurted out quickly.

Of course, that was false, but she didn't need to know that or concern herself that she wouldn't be able to afford it in her monthly expenses. He was going to pay for her and simply not tell her.

"Tempting." She chuckled.

"Let's go after breakfast." He said with resolve.

"It's not good to exercise after eating."

"It is, if you wait like 30 minutes." He countered.

"I can't get out of this, can I?" She joked.

"No." Minho grinned and grabbed his and her empty plate, taking them to the sink to wash. "You can go get changed."

She found his enthusiasm funny.

Then she found it not so funny when he actually made her do a pretty tiring workout, and she almost died of exhaustion.

Either way, they went to the gym together. Minho would go every day, and he would take Crystal with him every few days, helping her build up more strength. He also got her eating two meals before she had to go to work, and he was proud of himself for that.

They also continued with their new studying routine.

Crystal would come to his room every evening (or night, if she was working that day), they would study together and talk to each other about what they were reading, then they would go to sleep in Minho's bed; of course, never at the same time. Minho would wait until Crystal would fall asleep, and she would, with no doubt, because most days she worked 8-hour shifts and was exhausted, then he would swiftly slip in next to her, listening to her breathing, sometimes watching her chest fall up and down if she would sleep on her back, watching how cute her expression was when she was dreaming.

He loved sleeping next to her. It helped him fall asleep easily as well, because he genuinely enjoyed her being there with him, and he was always the type of person who loved being in others' presence.

It was all innocent, for neither of them was thinking about the other in any inappropriate ways, afraid to make the other uncomfortable. He didn't even want to start thinking of her as something more than a friend, and Crystal wouldn't allow herself to think differently either.

She would steal a glance every now and then, especially when Minho was working out, but she was doing her best to not develop any kind of feelings towards him. He was just her roommate, and maybe her friend.

Nothing more, nothing less.

---

The last exam Crystal had happened to fall on 15th June, coincidentally her birthday.

She asked the cook of the restaurant she worked at to make her two of his signature chocolate muffins, and she managed to talk her boss into letting her go home earlier. By the time 11 PM hit the clock, she was almost back at the apartment.

She went in and knocked happily on Minho's door, wanting to celebrate with him.

Truth is, she's never celebrated her birthday before, nor did she ever make it a big deal, because she always knew that no one truly cared about her, so what was the point? She would only grab something sweet, a muffin or a donut, and she would stick a single candle in it and blow it, but she would never tell anyone, not even people she considered friends. She was glad she did so, because not one of them stuck with her throughout the years. What even are friends, and why couldn't she form any meaningful relationships?

Now, however, after spending more time with Minho, she got hopeful, and she felt ready for the first time to tell someone that she was born today, 21 summers ago. In fact, it was the first time ever she actually wanted to tell someone, and to celebrate. She wanted to tell him.

She really thought he was going to be excited to see her, and that he would be the first person to ever wish her a happy birthday and mean it.

She knocked on his door and placed the two muffins behind her, in her right hand.

"Come in." He spoke, so she opened the door.

He didn't even look at her.

"Hey." She smiled either way.

"Hey, welcome back. Is it urgent?" He asked with a sigh. Something was wrong, he was not his usual cheerful self.

"... is everything okay?" She asked him, noting the unusual urgency in his voice.

"We have a big game in 3 days and I'm stressing out over what other techniques we could use."

"Oh. I see. Sorry for disturbing you." She said, hoping that he'll correct her, that he'd tell her she wasn't, and maybe that he'd turn around and smile at her, and she would give him his muffin, and tell him that it's her birthday, and he would wish her well, and maybe even sing her Happy Birthday.

"No worries. If there's nothing important, let's speak tomorrow, yea?" He turned around for the first time since she entered his room and smiled briefly, before turning his back once more.

Wishful thinking.

"Yea. There's nothing important. Just wanted to say hi." Her smile got washed off her face, and she felt stupid.

"Okay." He nodded. "I'm glad you got home safe."

"Yea. I brought you a muffin, by the way." She tried as a last attempt.

"Oh, thanks, but I'm not hungry. You can eat it."

"Okay. Good luck." She spoke, feeling her heart fall out of her chest.

She was wrong, after all.

~

Crystal made her way to her room and placed the muffins on her desk, looking at them. A few minutes ago, they were a symbol of happiness and celebration, but now, they just looked like a sad chocolate mess. They lost their appeal completely.

She took the small candle she bought earlier and stuck it in one of the cupcakes, lighting it.

She watched it burn for a while, seeing small bits of wax falling on top of the hardened frosting, and she knew she should've blown it out already, otherwise it was going to make a mess.

She should've been happy. It was her birthday!

Somehow, though, she never felt worse. Not even when she celebrated it alone all those years.

Tears were streaming down her face when she finally blew out the candle, and she made no wish.

It was heartbreaking to get used to someone's company and have expectations of them, only for them to disappoint you like this. Crystal's heart broke all over again, thinking over Minho's cold tone.

She took a bite off her cupcake, and felt sick, so she decided against eating it, and with disappointment weighing heavily on her, she grabbed them both and went to the kitchen, throwing them away.

---

Chapter 4 | Chapter 6

[lucysweatslove]

Vyvanse Day 4 today! Just took the 20mg.

Yesterday was my first day on 20mg, and I seemed to be doing okay. However, I somehow decided that a cold brew coffee (with ice so idk how many oz really) after the museum + 32oz Diet Dr. Pepper a few hours after that was a good idea. I didn’t finish all of the coffee (honestly, I forgot about it), but that’s still like 250mg of caffeine. One Ghost is 200mg, and a Rockstar is 160mg, and I can only handle like one of those in a day and I still get jittery (even before starting any ADHD med).

Suffice it to say, I did get some high HR notifications and in the afternoon I just felt… a little off I guess. I can’t quite explain it.

It was still much better/more tolerable than the Strattera. Ironic to me that a non-stimulant med was worse than the actual stimulant that turns into actual amphetamine via red blood cells*

It also didn’t seem to have much effect in keeping me awake or keeping me more “alert,” but it didn’t increase somnolence either? Like the Strattera had me taking 2 hour naps no matter what, but the Vyvanse at that dose didn’t seem to impact me on that front.

Attention wise, the jitteriness made it a little hard to focus on its own. I also just… decided I didn’t want to read. I finished an audiobook and got some online shopping done, though.

Today I am going to be mindful of my caffeine intake and only have some of a Rockstar (I just feel like I need something since even 2 hours after waking, I’m pretty tired this morning). Tomorrow I meet with the PMHNP again to check in, so I’d like to get a good feeling for how I’m doing on the 20s.

An annoying thing about these scheduled drugs: you can’t write for titration very well. For Vyvanse, my insurance has a dispensing limit of 30 pills every 30 days inclusive of strength. Idea being that it’s harder to share/sell them, or take more than intended, if you’re limited and cannot get more. Given that Vyvanse is available in 10mg increments you can technically do all titration with one pill/day. This works out well if you’re on an established dose or only going up 10mg or whatever in a month etc. The problem is that when you’re determining dose, especially when somebody is historically very sensitive, you’re stuck with the dose prescribed for as long as you have pills. I got 14 pills of 10mg for a 14 day supply, but I’m taking 20mg now, so I will “run out” of 10s before the end of the 14 days. They may not approve a new rx before 14 days, or only approve 16 pills until Aug 5, etc. And we may even want to go up to 30mg eventually which makes it hard to know how many pills to send in of the 20s and when. Which means I will NECESSARILY have to take the drug “not as prescribed” (skipping some days) until we find the right dose.

* I’m not kidding; Vyvanse is basically amphetamine with a lysine added to it, and the lysine part makes it relatively inactive. It goes into your blood, and there is an enzyme in red blood cells that will cleave the lysine away from the amphetamine and then you get the nice stimulant effect from the amphetamine! It’s designed this way because the cleaving is a slow step so it slows the rate you get dextroamphetamine, reducing a sharp high and abuse potential + somewhat increasing time of effect. Also should note that dextroamphetamine =/= methamphetamine. Methamphetamine has a small methyl group at the end (where Vyvanse has lysine) and this changes it a lot. Vyvanse primarily becomes dextroamphetamine via a very specific enzyme that only removes lysine (it won’t remove just the small methyl group). Much of methamphetamine is converted to a different amphetamine compound, not dextroamphetamine, so it’s *not* the same drug.

Also Vyvanse’s generic name is lisdexamphetamine: lis (lysine) + dex (dextro) + amphetamine. Generics do generally have a logic behind them yeah?