#my beautiful queen 🥹🥹 i always feel so thankful to have you my love 🥺🥺

[cherrypeaking]

to sun up my last ask:

good news!! i finally got a new air conditioner!! my parents helped set it up and it works great

bad news!! wasps made a nest in my old air conditioner so my room was swarming with those scary creatures but luckily my dad came to the rescue 🥹🥹

everything is fine now (aside from the txt poster that keeps trying to attack me 😒) and i am no longer burning alive in my own bedroom!! #crystal2ndwin (my first win was having you in my life 🩵🩵)

i can’t stop thinking about you baby 🥺🥺 you’re so beautiful and your voice is as clear as a bell in my mind… i think i might have a crush on you 😳😳 d-do you have a crush on me too? 🥺👉🏾👈🏾🩵🩵

i forgot what else i said but i couldn’t possibly forget the moodboard!! <3

i love you so much my cherry marshmallow, my sweet lovely girlfriend 🥹🥹🩵🩷

my love 🥹🩷 you must’ve fallen asleep on call which is totally okay and i’ll wait for you to wake up don’t worry 🥺🩷 i hope you sleep well 😚🩷

well~ you woke back up within the next five minutes hehe 🤭🩷 but i’ll keep that for when i send you my ask for the day~

i cant believe this app just decided to eat your ask just like that i got them all except this one :(

i’m so glad you got your new air conditioner 🥹 with that kind of weather it’s great that you have the possibility to be less hot (not like that though, because you’re always so hot 😖🩷🩷)

EEEEEEEK 😨😰 i’m so so glad your dad got rid of them wtf!! i’d have been so creeped out ;;; so so glad it’s over >3<

#crystal1stwin is having me in your life?? 🥹😭🩷 you say your rizz isn’t as good as mine but cmon~ you keep the pickup lines coming 🥹😭🩷🩷 i love you so much my fairy of crystals 🥺🩷

i keep thinking about you too my love 🥹🥺🩷 you’re the most beautiful woman 😚🩷🩷 and your voice drives me crazy >\\\\< aaaah do you? 😳😖🩷 i think i do~ i’m not sure…~ hehehehe i’m in love with you <3 🥹😚🩷

the moodboard is adorable and so us again my superb girlfriend is the most considerate and so easy to love 🥹😭🩷🩷 my heart calls out for you <3

i love you so much too, my crystal mint chewing gum~ my one and only girlfriend gem 😚🩷💎

[iamred-iamyellow]

⋆ ˚｡⋆౨ৎ˚ The Last Great American Dynasty

♥ masterlist | request rules | based on this request

♥ pairing: logan sargeant x fem!driver!reader

♥ synopsis: logan gets replaced at williams mid season by you, his girlfriend. luckily his racing career and f1 story is not over yet.

♥ smau - fc: women on pinterest - as always none of the pictures are mine <3

♥ warnings: swearing, hate comments, and james vowels slander !!!

♥ a/n: logan gets the happy ending he deserves (by taking james' job lol).

-August 26, 2024-

liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri, susie_wolff, and 3,592,602 more

williamsracing Y/n L/n to race for the remainder of the 2024 season

view comments

logansargeant proud of you ❤️

yourusername thank you logie. I can't wait to see where racing takes us both. I love you ❤️

user6 the fact that he's still so supportive of her... I love them your honor 🥺

alex_albon You gave it your all brother and it’s been a pleasure being teammates with you. I know whatever you do next, you’ll be awesome. I can't wait to race along side you as well @/yourusername. Lets make history.

user9 HOW ARE WE FEELING LOLEX NATION 😭

user1 the tears that are coming out of my eyes right now

user2 😧

user7 I felt my heart break in real time

user4 ... james I am in your fucking walls

user5 I am so proud of y/n but damn.

user21 can someone explain please??

user7 logan, the driver y/n is replacing is her boyfriend

user9 I cried.

user60 imagine taking your own BOYFRIENDS job. he deserves so much better

user51 poor logan 💔

user10 lets not let the sad news about logan leaving impact our support for y/n. shes the first woman to race in f1 in a VERY long time and that's an incredible achievement

user3 say it louder for the people in the back

user12 this !!!

user4 James vowels is the common enemy

user8 @/user4 TRUE

✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧

✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧

-Logan's Insta Story-

✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧

liked by logansargeant, susie_wolff, lilymhe, and 609,427 more

yourusername oh look i’m winning

view comments

user1 yes you are queen

user2 you don’t have to brag 😔

user5 POINTS

landonorris @/logansargeant maybe you should get her a dog

pierregasly 💀

user1 landooo 😭

user8 how is she so gorgeous

user9 oh to be y/n

user6 prove the haters wrong !!!

✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧

liked by yourusername, patriciooward, Indycar, and 984,582 more

logansargeant back in blue

tagged; @/andrettiindy

view comments

yourusername 🩵

logansargeant 🩵

patriciooward good to see you again

user7 SHUT THE FUCK UP NOT ANDRETTI SIGNING HIM FOR 2025

user9 HAHAHA

user3 the personal beef andretti has with f1 is inspiring 😩

user8 WHAT THE FUCK IS A KILOMETER 🦅🇺🇸

user5 lets go logan

user1 oh we are SO back.

✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧

liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri, andrettiindy, and 2,459,302 more

logansargeant today I got the privilege of marrying the most talented, beautiful, and kind woman I have ever met. you have stood by me since the beginning of my career and I am honored that you chose me to support you throughout the future of yours. I love you so much

comments are limited

f1 our favorite paddock couple

indycar double it and give it to the next motorsport

alex_albon congratulations to the both of you!

lilyzneimer thank you for making me your maid of honor 🥹 you looked absolutely stunning today

yourusername lilyyyy 😭🫶

williamsracing so who caught the boquet? 👀

yourusername lily mhe 🤭

lilymhe we might be needing those brides maid dresses again soon

✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧

✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧

-December 2035-

It has just been announced that former F1 driver Logan Sargeant and his wife, Y/n L/n will be the new team principal and CEO of Williams Racing.

The F1 American Dynasty

If you're unfamiliar with the story of Sargeant you may not understand the significance of this change for Williams. He had a spot on the grid during 2023-2024 before being dropped mid-season and replaced by his now wife Y/n L/n. He then went on to drive for Andretti, an American Indycar team and Y/n won four championships during her time in F1. The two of them have continued to carry on the legacy of American drivers in Formula 1, encouraged by the Andretti family.

✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧

liked by andrettiindy, susie_wolff, oscarpiastri, and 1,362,503 more

yourusername CEO life

view comments

lilymhe GORGEOUS

yourusername no YOU <33

williamsracing glad to have you back @/logansargeant

user2 even admin is a logan fan

user4 oh FUUUCK YEA

user7 stop the middle picture-

user9 I want what they have 😭

user1 their ULTIMATE revenge

user12 fuck james vowels

user3 all my homies hate james vowels

✧˖ °. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖°✧

end notes: thank you so much for reading! even though logan isn't on the grid I'll still have a few fics coming out for him soon <3

[11cupids-tarot11]

Short messages from your cat/kitten! ₊˚⊹♡ ᓚ₍ ^. .^₎

˚₊⋅─── /ᐠ - ˕ -マ ───⋅ ˚₊

1 -> 2

Cupid's Services Cupid's Master-List Socials

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Pile 1- Queen of Cups, Nine of Cups, Nine of Pentacles.

Hi my pile 1's! So right off the bat I feel like your cat really adores you! You guys are best buds, your cat loves to spend lots of quality time with you, just chilling in the same room as you, I'm seeing for some they really love watching you 😍 lol some of you could like to listen to music with your cat and even for some your cat loves listening to you play an instrument ✨ it's like special bonding time you guys have!

I think your cat is very content with you and hopes you are too! They love the way the things are even if sometimes they show it in a funny way like by knocking over cups and such 🤣 they think you're so beautiful, in everything you do! They see every detail! They admitted to really love you, like family! Lol. I think you have always grown up around animals or have always been an animal lover, you could've had your cat for awhile now, even have other small pets like fishes and such, they might like to watch those too! How cute!

I feel like for some of you this is a boy cat. Someone could be a water sign, the color blue might be significant here!

Hope you enjoyed!

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Pile 2- Six of Cups, Queen of Cups, Queen of Wands.

Hi pile 2!

For some of you I feel like this is a cat you might've had one when you were younger since they were a kitten, but you don't have them anymore. I feel like a majority of you they might've passed away. But they want to say they love and adore you, you were their queen! They idolized you lol you were so sweet to them, took very good care of them and they love you for it and want you to know that! 💘

You could've found this cat as a kitten or maybe been given them, either way you treated them with so much adoration and they remember your lovely smile! 😊 Because you were so sweet to them!

This cat could've followed you around as a kitten! Might've imprinted on you and thought you were their mother 🥺💖

I feel they also think it was so amazing how you knew exactly how to take care of all their needs, like when they were hungry you suddenly knew every time and bam like magic they had food lol 🤣 how cute they think you took care of them very well! They thank you for that! 💖 🥹

Hope you like this reading!!

/ᐠ≽꩜ ᯅ ꩜≼マ

[imaginespazzi]

Nivi – hey bestie, you’ve done it again – I wasn’t sure it could get more heartbreaking than the last one and yet!

As always, the writing is- well, it’s everything.

The parallels between high school them and college them was immaculate, and I so wish Paige could have fulfilled her dream of kissing Azzi under the confetti, but alas, maybe in another universe 😉

I loved the little exchange about UConn and California, and how that possibility was always there but Paige could just never accept it.

P and UConn winning the natty this year – it had to happen in at least one universe, so thank you for letting it happen in this one.

Side note: Drew and Paige interactions are always top tier, and very much the type of momentary fluff that I needed to break up the sadness while reading.

Side note 2: I love that I don’t even need to imagine what Azzi wearing Paige’s jersey would look like, but I’m glad ucla au Paige got to experience it too 🥹

The celebration with the team was so cute and of course it would be KK that basically helps break the ice (and her lil innocent “you should bring her around more often” 🥺). Also, all the little moments Az got with everyone else in the team was so wholesome, and ofc queen Nika being a loveable menace who’s always just looking out for her twin.

Side note 3: I love love love the two piggyback moments haha, just because that’s so pazzi core to me idk, I feel like there’s been a lot of photos where Azzi is piggybacking Paige irl, like that’s very much their thing so I adored seeing it incorporated here. But then, the ending. I knew it was coming, but it certainly did not make it hurt any less when we got there. “Fuck,” Paige’s voice is still wracked with sleep, “I thought you left.” “That’s more your style,” Azzi says – this was particularly heartbreaking, but I can’t really blame Azzi, even if P is trying so hard to make things right.

Overall, I may or may not have been tearing up throughout the entire chapter, and it somehow hit me even harder the second time I read through it? I think that’s just testament to your writing tbh.

Thoughts on what’s next:

Do things finally start getting better? It can’t get any worse, can it? (famous last words) 😅

I did wonder actually, whether you’d have them win or lose the natty, only because if they did win which obviously they did here (thank you), could that maybe change P’s mind at all on declaring or not?

I’m guessing she obviously sticks to her og decision and stays, and so I’m super intrigued on what might come next for them.

Like will they try going back to being just friends? Even though they’ve already tried and failed and knowing that would never be enough for Paige. But can they really not be in each other’s lives??

Will they try seeing other people again??

Summer’s coming up in the timeline and they’ve never spent an entire summer apart, so what will they do this summer? 😔 Or will we have a big time jump?

So many questions, and only you have the answers, Nivi.

Favourite lines/quotes:

The moon shines against Azzi’s face and Paige thinks that so much has changed, but Azzi’s still that kind of beautiful

“Do you know what my answer would have been?” “Yeah,” Azzi says softly, squeezing her hands, “yeah I do.”

Alternate lyrics that came to mind while reading:

Talk about our future like we had a clue. Never planned that one day, I'd be losing you.

In another life, I would be your girl. We'd keep all our promises, be us against the world.

Oh, and in honour of your love for Taylor, a Taylor lyric that came to mind was specifically this:

And I can go anywhere I want. Anywhere I want, just not home - mainly from the perspective of Paige getting almost everything she’s ever wanted, except the thing she wants most.

PS: I don’t really listen to Taylor’s music much anymore (nothing negative, just a shift in my music tastes these past couple of years!), but if there’s anything you think I should definitely give a listen to from her latest album, let me know!

As always, thank you for all you do for us. Have a wonderful weekend 💗

Much love, -🙋‍♀️

Hi bestie, one thing about me is that I will find a way to make it worse! 🤪

Thank you my sweets, it always means the world <3

I'm glad you caught that because I wanted to hint at the idea that it wasn't just a random decision of Azzi's part to choose UCLA and that she'd always been considering it.

If I can add Drew and Paige interactions, best believe I will find a way to do it. That's another relationship that's so precious to me.

Shoutout to the one anon who asked for Azzi to wear Paige's jersey in the universe as well because I took that and ran with it so I hope they liked it, because I liked their idea (come say hi!)

The team scene was one my favorites to write honestly, especially just in general KK is so fun to write because she's so fun and I need my chaotic family (Paige-Azzi-KK-Ice) to be a thing in every universe.

YES the piggybacks are just so Pazzi-core and I know this is an au but I like to take things from what we already know about them and just tweak it to keep some semblance of realism. Also piggyback are just really cute and Paige seems like the kind to beg literally anyone to carry her anyways

Things will get better because I actually don't know if they can get worse (actually they probably could but it might be hard to come back from lol) but things getting better is gonna take a lot

See if Paige changes her mind and declares, things become easy for them with her going to LA and I'm not in the business of making things easy for them lol

You think I have the answer to these question but truly what I write is just as much a mystery of where my inspiration will take to me as it is to you. So we'll see but we're on the ascent upwards, so no more other people lol!

I LOVE THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY SO MUCH!!

As for Taylor, the new album's pretty good babes if you wanna go listen! Lowkey a lot of the songs work pretty well with this fic lmao. But my favorites are loml and Fortnight I think.

Always love your detailed takes on the new parts and just seeing you in my inbox always makes me smile <3

[sugoi-writes]

FUCK. I WROTE PART NINE AND HAD IT ALL READY TO GO AND THEN MY KID GOT HER HANDS ON MY PHONE AND CLOSED THE APP. THANK LUCIFER I HAD THE FIRST HALF SAVED AS A DRAFT BUT STILL. OTL sending this separate because I was paranoid she'd do it again and I would have to write the second part a third time 😭 also realizing I forgot to put my sig at the bottom of Pt.9

..... Annnnd of course, after pressing send I remember that I forgot to rewrite the part where reader chokes Alastor when they cum. just shoot me holy motherfucking shit

At some point I'mma just make these into a full blown PWP fic. It seems like they get longer with each installment 🤣 (I'm sorry btw, I always feel kinda bad whenever I leave long messages in anyone's inbox 😫

AYEEEE WELL YA KNOW WHAT THEY SAY - GREAT MINDS THINK ALIKE!! 😘❤️‍🔥

It's a fitting pet name Hunny Pun! You're the queen of puns and you're so so SO sweet like a Honey Bun! is that icing or Alastor's jizz on you??? ... im so sorry i'll see myself out again 😭 CAN'T FIND AND KISS ME IF I FIND AND KISS YOU FIRST BABES~! ❤️❤️❤️

I can't hold on to my anonymity anymore guys so I'mma be making Pt.10 my reveal post~ it's killing me that I can't leave rabid fangirl messages on your works like you all do here for me! I really did wanna wait until I got the Smutmus Holy Trinity complete or at least in the revision stages but just- GAH! I NEED YALL TO KNOW HOW AMAZING I THINK YOU ARE. Beautiful beautiful minds, inside and out i can't even-!

Seriously though, I can't even begin to express how grateful and happy I am to have met any of you! And there are no words in the English dictionary (or any at all really) that I could use to describe what I feel about how accepting and supportive you've been! I could NEVER thank yall enough for helping me to find the joy in writing again. I love all three of you so much and I'm honored to call you friends!! 🥺🥰💋

- ☄️❤️ Smut Santa

False Alarm for the Next Part!! And honestly, thank God, the vibe is still not charged HAH--

Oh no!!! I'm so sorry that happened to you!! I had a similar experience when writing my part 2 to my Nun! Alastor fic. Fun fact: had to re-write it 5 times because I kept forgetting to save it. ;;_;; hhhh my baby fever is so bad I'm crying, but man, KIDS! What a little stinker 🥹❤️

Also, my ask box is usually super empty? Like, you could LICK the floor with how neat and empty it is? I LOVE messages? Even better if they long like Alastor's girthy fucking co--

We--We were- when we??? ALASTOR GETS--??? MY HANDS AROUND HIS???

*Danny.Exe has experienced an Error*

*Rebooting*

OKAY IM BACK--

☄️❤️Anon... babycakes. At this rate I'm gonna do more than fucking kiss you. I think we're past that now. And if you keep calling me 'Hunny Pun', or similar pet names, I'm just gonna jump your bones--

Hug you!!!! I meant hug you!!!

It's Alastor's jizz. It's canon-- NO DONT LEAVE I NEED TO KNOW HOW I GOT IT ON MY FAAAAAAACE

GUYS CODE TREAT, CODE TREAT, THE ANON VEIL IS DROPPING!!! ITS DROPPING DHDHDJDHDJ-- You will never gain a mutual as fast as you will then I SWEAR

☄️❤️!!! Smut Santaaaaa! 🥹😭❤️ Your mind is a beautiful, smutty, enchanting place!!! Knowing that you've been religiously cranking this out, while also having a kiddo... Seriously, how do you do it??? If anyone deserves the praise rn, 🎵it's you??? It's you, ITS ALWAYS YOU!!🎵 ❤️❤️❤️

Don't push yourself too hard! Please? ❤️ I will treasure these rare, scrumptious little treats for as long as I have brain cells left ❤️ I will call you friend until you tell me to quit or I lose my voice for good. And even then, my lips will keep moving and repeating the same thing until I'm blue in the face. ❤️❤️❤️ you are such a sweet, sweet, soul, and I can feel your vibes, and they are so wholesome! I can't wait to meet the person or sexual fiend behind it all! I feel like I speak for us all, and not just the main 3, but EVERYONE: everyone who has read your posts love you to bits. And they love your work to bits. Best believe when you publish your first work, we'll be there. En masse. And we will be EAGERLY returning the love you surprised us with.

Thank you for all that you do. On this post in particular, you deserve a foot rub, a forehead kiss, and a hug that lifts and spins you off your feet! 💗💗💗

Have a blissful, best of days you can have, dear! You deserve it! 💗

[ablatheringblatherskite]

4, 10, 20, 135? :)

AAAAAHHH YAYY, thank you so much for the ask, Teaspoon (can I call u that?? Or do u have a better nickname suggestion!)!! So sorry it took a bit, I was trying to PERFECT this answer LOL (the book recc part especially took me a bit HAHA)

4. A poetry book that reads like a story

I think I'm gonna have to say When We Were Very Young and Now We Are Six by A.A. Milne!! I absolutely adore those poem books aaaaaaaa, I left them in our other home and I miss it so muchhh. I'm not sure if the question means all poems are connected or each poem feels like a story on its own, to me they really feel like the latter. They're so cute and beautiful and charming and nostalgic and agghhhhh

here's some of my favorites, just to name two of many:

and

Wind On The Hill

No one can tell me, Nobody knows, Where the wind comes from, Where the wind goes.

It’s flying from somewhere As fast as it can, I couldn’t keep up with it, Not if I ran.

But if I stopped holding The string of my kite, It would blow with the wind For a day and a night.

And then when I found it, Wherever it blew, I should know that the wind, Had been going there too.

So then I could tell them Where the wind goes… But where the wind comes from Nobody knows.

10. A book that got you through something

Okay this is a toughie, but only because I can't remember any specific times. BUT BOOKS HAVE ALWAYS AND FOREVER WILL HELP ME GET THROUGH A LOT OF DIFFICULT THINGS!

BUT one book that I am sure has helped me through SOME difficult things is Inkheart by Cornelia Funke. That's honestly one of my main comfort books ever since I was like, ten years old. Some people consider it to be slow but I think that's why I love it 🥺. It really takes time to depict the more mundane, realistic moments in between the high-stakes, perilous ones in their adventure. It's really about the ENTIRE journey, and I really love that

20. A book that got you out of a reading slump

I think one book that ripped me FIERCELY out of a reading slump was Wings of Fire, book 6: Moon Rising. I absolutely LOVE the Wings of Fire series (it's no surprise that it's about dragons LOL. I... love dragons...), and I'll be honest after finishing the first quartet I was skeptical about continuing to the next part of the series just because it ended so well, but I was NOT DISAPPOINTED. Disclaimer: I have yet to find a copy of book seven... BUT CAN'T WAIT FOR WHEN I FINALLY DO 😭

135. Recommend any book you like!

oh GOSH THERE'S SO MANY TO CHOOSE FROM. UMMM. Alright I have two!

Okay so there's Inkheart by Cornelia Funke, a REALLY underrated book imo that I love so much, that I think you'd like if you like fantasy and adventure that takes place in the real world. I don't know if COZY is the right word for it but it'd really cozy to me even if they characters are often in danger lol, but I think the biggest reason I love it so much is because it's a real love letter to books and reading (and even writing as well!). It's about a book binder and his daughter, and the book binder has the ability to read characters from books to life. I read it when I was ten and have loved it ever since.

Then there's the Wings of Fire quartet by Tui T. Sutherland, which I ABSOLUTELY LOVE TO THIS DAY. If you love dragons and fantasy, then you'd probably like this!!! Yeah it's a children's book but who CARES. This book series is about five dragonets who have been told all their life that they are destined to stop the Sandwing queen war, and their journey as they try to do exactly that. The world-building is so cool, with the different type of dragons, and I love the five main characters so much and their relationship with each otherrrrr. Seriously one of my favorite series ever.

ANYWAY IM SORRY AGAIN FOR THE LATE RESPONSE!! I've been thinking about this ask for days I swear thank you so much for asking it 🥹

If you wanna ask me more book-related asks, fire away!!

[1004tyun-archive]

my girlfriend 🥺🥺🩷

i was so busy today :(( i’m finally home and had a little sorbet as i told you already~ i also got a vanilla ben and jerry’s 👉👈🩷🩷 i can’t wait to have it for breakfast 🤭🩷 i always have half a pint for breakfast >3< so i’m excited to wake up and have it yayyyy 🥹🥹

for lunch i had what you call wifey salad hehe 🥺🩷 i finally finished all my carrots before it expired!! so relieved hehe~ i’m craving more fried foods now ;3;

i don’t know when exactly we will get alone time for a call but i hope it’ll be soon my love 🥺🥺🩷 i’ve been missing you so much… i loved getting to talk about anything and everything with you, always getting to know more about you is so interesting and important to me… makes me feel even more thankful that my path crossed yours because we met at the perfect time 🥹🥹🩷 and now you’re my girlfriend 👉👈🩷 i’m so happy with you mommy i wanna kiss you so bad 🥺🥺😭🩷🩷

my energy is close to a zero at the moment so i don’t think i can make a moodboard 🥲 so here’s one of my memes fhsjjfjd

my beautiful crystal gem 🥹🥹🩵🩷💎 i hope you’re happy and healthy and feeling good today 🥺🩷🩷 i’m in love with you my special wifey~ 😚🩷🩷

my beautiful softie girlfriend~ 🥺🩵🩵

ooh vanilla ben and jerry’s~ what a lovely thing to look forward to 🥺

mmm yummy wifey salad 🤭 congrats on using up all your carrots!!

i’m hoping we can get some alone time so we can call too 🥺🥺🩵 i miss you so much, i miss your pretty voice and your lovely singing and your infectious laugh 🥺 i love getting to know more about you 🥺 how wonderful it is that our paths crossed at the perfect time! i’m so so thankful to be your girlfriend my love, you mean the world to me and i’m looking forward to what july will bring us~ i’m so so happy with you my dearest i wanna hold your face in my hands and kiss you so badly right now 🥺🥺🩵🩵

aw my baby 😭😭 that’s okay!! your no my queen coded meme more than makes up for it lmoajsjsjs

my sweet soft cherry marshmallow 🥺🩵🩵 i’m having a good mellow day, part of that is thanks to you of course, the woman i’m in love with 🥺🥺😭🩵🩷

[storyofmychoices]

It's so realistic that she can't can't keep track of the months anymore let alone the days. It's crazy to think that a world could exist without the notion of attention to specific days, but it truly makes sense and is perfect here to show how things have changed.

It's crazy to think that it's been a decade from the start of this series to the first journal entry here. I know the whole ordeal happened significantly before the book starts, but I never really took the time to fill in the gaps of what happened in that time. It's crazy to think how much could have happened, the big, the small, the mundane and the fearful.

But back to this...

The first entry truly shows how she is losing hope and it is heartbreaking. Our once strong Florence is giving up...

But Jim remembering the date, just so he can give his sons a birthday is beautiful.

Eli got his bow and he smiled! 🥺🥹

That is such a powerful and important statement! ❤️

This section hits different and I don't know why but I'm here thinking about what all the Jewish people went through during WWII, the hiding in silence, afraid to be seen or heard for fear for their lives, families under floorboards and in attics just trying to avoid the threat to their lives. Children being ripped from their parents and brutally attacked.... This story may be from a future we hope could never happen, but the truth is, there was a different time of horde that made people feel like this in our past. That is terrifying to think. It happened once, and I pray it never happens again, but people are crazy and extreme and I do fear what people are truly capable of.

It's so important to treasure every moment we have with everyone we love, for small moments of comfort are really a gift.

Isn't that the truth? In any tragedy, the mental and emotional damage is far worse than anything physical and will always take longer to repair and it will never be the same. 💔

“It’s bad enough I had a drone lurch at me, but to see Eli’s underwear on his head as it did? Well, that was downright horrifying!”

LOL okay this was hilarious. Thank you for making me smile before you go and break my heart.

“Yes,” she clasped his hand. “Moments just like this. Where the sun is shining, and the autumn leaves are painting a canvas against the sky. Our clean clothes are drying on the porch, and, most importantly, I’m here with you. There is so much to be grateful for, even in this world, and that’s what I hold on to.”

🥺🥺🥺

. He believed Kenny took the family to a colony to give Nessa and Brady a chance to find better partners as they approached adulthood. “Better” than Eli or David. Despite the close bond the families had shared, in the end, the color of her son’s skin didn’t make them suitable partners for Kenny’s children.

😡 😡 😡 😡

Eli's the one that deserves better!

Two decades now... Crazy how time passes! Also that means the sad part is coming closer!

This whole section 👏👏👏👏

AND THAT LAST JOURNAL PAGE!!!!

FLORENCE is a QUEEN!!!! She really is amazing and her journal is an amazing story.

This was far more heartwarming than I expected. Yes it's full of angst and emotions that you feel through your heart, but it's also a story of losing but then finding hope. It's not at all what I expected.

I know they won't be easy to read for Eli, but the love and devotion his mother poured into these pages will bring him some comfort. He'll always know he was loved above all else. His mother survived for him and his brother. Her family was her joy!!!

Ahh this was such an amazing series! I am beyond in awe of your vision and talent. You are incredible.

Also is this the end? If it is, I survived the angst and am happy it ended with this bittersweet ending (even though I know what happens to his family 😭) or will you be writing that inevitable end which will for sure bring the full on crying on the floor that I expected from this part!

@lilyoffandoms

A Mother's Journal - Part 4

Book: Wake the Dead (pre-series)

Characters: Eli Sipes; Jim, Florence & David Sipes (his family)

Rating: Mature

Words: Approx 3,200 (including journal entries / text)

Warnings: Loss, past deaths, depression, adult themes.

Summary: In the final segment of this series, Florence is learning to survive after she's lost something dear - hope. Recent challenges have left her surrendering to what she sees as a bleak horizon for her sons. But as she battles through depression and guilt to try to find meaning and a reason to carry on.... and she imparts that knowledge to her son.

A/N: A quick note, this covers over five years' time, but you'll notice there are large gaps in the timeline. That's done on purpose as the family's existence has become more mundane. There was little to define the differences in years, much less days. This will mention the disappearance of the Jones family. This is covered in the 3-part series Coming Up Blank which outlines Eli's first romantic relationship with his best friend, Nessa, and her disappearance.

When I started this, I knew it would be painful to become familiar with the Sipes family, knowing their ultimate canonical fate. As a mother, getting inside Florence's head as she does her best to provide for her family during the most difficult times has left me a little heartbroken to let her go. I know this has been a difficult series to read, but I hope you've found the glimmers of hope contained within it.... because that's its true message. Thanks for taking the journey with me. | @aprilchallenge | Family, Love

Series Masterlist WTD Masterlist Full Masterlist

Fall 2038

Florence stepped onto the small front porch, a basket of wet clothing under her arm. It was Tuesday, which meant laundry day. While David had largely taken over that task, Jim insisted their youngest accompany him as he hunted. 

“He has to get better at this,” Jim insisted. “We won’t be here forever, Florence, and if anything should happen to Eli, David will need this skill to survive.”

Florence smiled as she recalled how David decided they would begin to dry their clothes on the porch. A wayward drone was plodding on the perimeter of their property when it stumbled into their clothing line. After untangling its mangled limbs, it wandered down the path, dragging their clothing behind it.

Nothing came easily in their world, and clothing was no exception. So losing the items was bad enough, but David had an even stronger argument for changing the process.

“It’s bad enough I had a drone lurch at me, but to see Eli’s underwear on his head as it did? Well, that was downright horrifying!”

Jim and Florence weren’t even sure the change would make a difference, but they didn’t care. They were so amused they agreed to it. David was so proud. Her youngest boy, with a poet’s soul, wasn’t made for this world. Despite the family’s best efforts to show him it wasn’t true, he often felt inadequate compared to his older brother, who adapted so well. So Florence knew this little change meant so much to her boy, and it made her happy each time she helped on laundry day.

Looking out into the field, she spotted Eli. He sat with his knees pulled up his chest, staring into the distance. With the last of the wash hung, she walked over to join her oldest.

“Do you mind some company?” she asked as she approached.

Eli glanced up without expression. He was unhappy that his father asked him to sit out this hunt, even though he understood why. But Florence knew it was more to it.   Eli had changed. Losing the Joneses hit hard, and the mystery surrounding their disappearance made closure impossible. Then the horror of the surge… the fear instilled in them all. The rebuild Florence knew was ahead of her family was still a work in progress.

“There’s no need to ask, Ma,” he replied.

“Of course there is! You’re entitled to some privacy if you wish.”

He turned to her with a slight frown. “Mom, there are four of us… how much more privacy do I need?”

They sat in comfortable silence; Eli was picking at the grass beneath him when he finally spoke.

“What was it like, Mom?” He asked. “I was so young when the parasite hit; I hardly remember it anymore. I was just a kid, and I never even knew what it was like to be an adult during those times. But you did. How difficult was it for you to adjust?”

Florence signed deeply and moved closer to her son. “It wasn’t easy, Eli, and if I had stopped to dwell on it, it might have been too much to bear. But, we didn’t have the luxury of dwelling. In those early days, we spent every second struggling to stay alive and keep ourselves safe. After that, learning how to provide for us out here, that was more than a full-time job. We just did what we had to do.”

“Do you still miss it….the way things used to be?”

“Of course,” she breathed. “But not as much as I used to. Initially, I hoped a cure would be found, and maybe we’d be able to return to how things were. But it’s been so long….”

“So you don’t have hope anymore?” he interrupted.

Florence swallowed, taking time to choose her words wisely. The truth was, in many ways, hope died long ago, but who was she to rob her son of it? Even if he had only the slightest spark within him, she couldn’t extinguish it.   

“It’s not that… it’s just been this way for so long now that… I’m just trying to find the best way to live within our reality. It doesn’t help to dwell on how things were or what we’ve lost. All I can do is take little moments and make them the best they can be.”

“Moment like this?” he said, a hint of a smile tugging at his lips.  

“Yes,” she clasped his hand. “Moments just like this. Where the sun is shining, and the autumn leaves are painting a canvas against the sky. Our clean clothes are drying on the porch, and, most importantly, I’m here with you. There is so much to be grateful for, even in this world, and that’s what I hold on to.”

“Do you ever…” he trailed.

“Ever what, son?”

“Do you ever wonder what happened to the Joneses?”

“I almost wish I didn’t, but I do.”

Eli felt tears welling in his eyes, wishing to hide them from his mother. He turned away and bit his cheek until they were held at bay. Only then did he respond.

“So do I,” he whispered.

A mother can tell what her child needs, and at that moment, Eli needed her presence and nothing more. Wrapping an arm around him, she held him tight and let him take the lead. They sat in silence for a long while before he spoke again.

“Mom, do you and Dad have any idea what happened to them… if you do… you’d tell us, right?”

Her breath hitched as she recalled the conversation she and Jim shared after their friends went missing. Jim was confident he knew why they left without so much as a goodbye. He believed Kenny took the family to a colony to give Nessa and Brady a chance to find better partners as they approached adulthood. “Better” than Eli or David. Despite the close bond the families had shared, in the end, the color of her son’s skin didn’t make them suitable partners for Kenny’s children.

Florence had promised her husband she would never utter a word of this to the boys; they had suffered enough. Florence agreed. While she didn’t like lying to her son and understood the agony of the unknown, she didn’t want to burden them with that load.

“Mom?” Eli asked, his eyes insisting upon an answer as Florence warred with herself over the right thing to do.

“No, Eli,” she insisted. “We don’t.”

“OK,” he nodded before turning away.  

The truth was, she didn’t know for sure, even if Jim’s suspicions seemed plausible. The only facts were that the Joneses disappeared without a trace. Her children’s only friends, their first loves, were stolen, now rendered to be no more than memories of the past. That was painful enough, and she wasn’t about to add the bitter sting of prejudice and racism to the mix.

Florence often felt contrite about the things she couldn’t give her children, so when presented with the opportunity to provide them with a precious gift, she gave it. She would allow Eli to remember Kenny Jones as the skilled archer who took an interest in him and helped make him the marksman he was today. She’d let him reminisce about the family who appeared to love him as one of their own. She wouldn’t allow the seeds of doubt that infested her mind, leading her to question every memory shared, to creep into her son’s. His present and future had been damaged, and she wouldn’t allow anything to corrupt his past too.

“You know it’s possible that we could see them again someday,” Eli muttered. “I know it’s not probable, but it’s not impossible.”

“No,” Florence half smiled, “it isn’t. I’ve seen a whole lot of bad things that seemed impossible come to be in my lifetime, so I’m holding on to hope that some of the good things that seem impossible will happen too. You know, you’re old for me to share this with now. There have been times over the years when it all seemed like too much. The burden and fears were too great, and I wanted to give up. But your father talked me through. He said the present was rough, but he refused to believe that’s all there would ever be. If there was even an inkling of hope for you or David to have some joy in your future, he would fight for it… and will I… and so should you.”

Eli smiled as he warmly embraced his mother, the two only coming apart when they heard voices in the distance. They turned to see David and Jim strolling down the path, though David seemed to be jogging more than strolling.

“Mom! Mom!” he beamed. “We’ve got dinner!”

“Oh, yeah?” Florence smiled. “What are we having?”

“Pheasant. Isn’t that one of your favorites?”

“It sure is,” she said, mussing up her youngest boy's hair.

“You’re getting good at this hunting thing?” Eli grinned.

“Do I have a choice?” David laughed.

His brother poked at his rib cage and chided him. “Not if you want to keep some meat on your bones.”

“Yeah, have to make sure I provide a good meal for the zombies,” David teased, earning a stern look from his mother.

“I joke! I joke!” David said contritely, holding up his hands in surrender.

“Well, thank God you don’t have to persist on being a comedian,” Florence laughed.

“Everyone good here?” Jim smiled as he reached the happy trio.

“We’re good,” his wife smiled. “We’re really good.”

“You know what we need,” Eli stated. “A family day at the lake, like old times.”

“Old times,” David mocked. “We went a few weeks ago!”

“I’m not that old,” Eli smirked. “So that’s old times to me.”

“I think we can manage one more trip before winter,” Jim nodded. “What do you say, Flor?”

“I say the boys should start planning the picnic!”

Eli and David rushed to the cabin, talking animatedly as they ran. Jim put his arm around Florence as they sauntered behind.

“They aren’t all bad days,” Jim said in his sweet baritone voice that melted Florence’s heart.

“No, they aren’t. They’re not all bad days at all.”

Thank you so much for sharing this journey. ❤️

Perma: @a-crepusculo @animesuck3r @annoyingmillenialnewbie @crazy-loca-blog @differenttyphoonwerewolf @doriopenheart @fayeswiftie @gryffindordaughterofathena @genevievemd @inlocusmads @kingliam2019 @liaromancewriter @lucy-268 @onikalover @openheartforeverinmyheart @potionsprefect @quixoticdreamer16 @rookiemartin @secretaryunpaid @socalwriterbee @sophxwithers @tessa-liam @trappedinfanfiction @jerzwriter @choicesficwriterscreations

WTD Only: @cariantha @kyra75 @lilyoffandoms @missameliep

[cherrypeaking]

babyyy 🥺🥺🩵🩵 i had so much fun on our call i can’t believe i was ever worried about us not getting to spend as much time together when our call ended up being just as long, if not longer, than most of our other calls 😭😭 (in case you were wondering its place on the leaderboard, it’s in second place under the call we had last week! ✨)

i just got done writing the recap and i was laughing to myself the whole time i had so much fun 🥺🥺🥺 i can’t stop laughing about no my queen it’s so funny djshhshs

my heart is so warm for you my love 🥺🥺 everything about our call was so perfect (except when my mom kept interrupting 😭 who goes to the movies that early in the morning anyway??) you’re so thoughtful, sweet, kind, welcoming, funny, and so so beautiful 🥺🥺 my pretty princess i wanna see you wear cute hair clips you would look so adorable 🥺🩵🩵

when we hung up i went to get food and i wished you were with me in the kitchen so badly i really turned around and expected to see you in my house like djshhshs 😭😭 i missed you so badly and i still do baby 🥺 i hope you slept well and i’m sorry you have to get up so early for work especially when you stayed up so late just to talk to me :(( even when you were dozing off i was so endeared by you.. you’re such a dream 🥺🩵 i was imagining that i was petting your hair while you were falling asleep in my arms ;; 🩵🩵🩵

moodboard but it’s just all soft fluffy taehyun since you remind me so much of him 🥺🥺🥺i’m trying to be less shy when it comes to telling you how i feel >< i’m not used to being so vocal about wanting someone so this is all new to me 🥺 you make me feel so wanted and seen and heard and i’m so thankful for you my sweet girl 🥺🥺🩵🩵 i love you so so much

looking forward to making more fun memories with you baby~

mommyyyy omg 🥺😭🩷🩷 this is definitely one of my favorite calls (they’re all my favorite except that train connection 10 min call 😭 so anxiety inducing to lose connection with my gf 😭) 🥺🥺🩷🩷 i didn’t expect us to get as much time together if not more and i really prefer it this way so we don’t have to force ourselves to stay up and we are both very awake and can talk lots 🥺🥺🩷 9hrs and 42 minutes right?? 😳

i love your recaps so much i’m still so amused by all the taehyun only liking to eat pussy hc like 😭😭😭 no my queen, don’t dirty your knees and moony really killed us with her addition it was such a highlight of the call 🥹🩷🫶 (your parents are so funny for this i’d never go to the movies this early 0_0)

everything about our call was really perfect it all felt like the right amounts of seriousness and the right amounts of crackheadedness and obviously we always go back to being all lovey dovey and those are my favorite parts because i have the best girlfriend ever 🥹🥹🩷🩷 if i start wearing hair clips i’m gonna send you pics of them hehe~ i wanna go to that shop i went to again just to document on what i found to you >\\< 🩷🩷

i wish i didn’t have to go to sleep so that we could keep going and i’d be there for your day as well and get to see what you’d make yourself for food 🥺🥺🩷 i’m happy you liked my salad and that you said i was wifey material hehe 👉👈🩷 you’re my wifey my precious wifey >\\\< 🩷🩷 i was so endeared by you too when you were dozing off so it feels good to know you felt the same mommy ;///; i stayed up because i wanted to 🥺 i’m a little sleepy but i know i’ll catch up on that tonight~ i needed to have you on call for as long as i could 🥺🥺🩷

the moodboard is so cute and so my favorite tyun like it’s really him he’s so gf and floofy 🥺🥺 hehehe mommy is getting better and better at it!! i feel so seen and wanted and heard with you my love 🥹🥹🩷 you’re the one for me i’m so so thankful our paths decided to meet we really met at both of our needed times 🥺🥺 i love you so much and i’m so looking forward to making more memories with you too my love 🥹🥹🩷🩷

[avatar-anna]

Are you taking a requests? If so can I replace one with single dad h and y/n maybe a cute bonding moment between Harry and one of the girls and then y/n and the other girl then meet up for dinner together and then head home and watch movies together till the girls fall asleep?

not quite what you asked for but something a little different to change it up!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

yourinstagram

harrystyles, kaykaystyles, and 210,321 others liked this post

yourinstagram: Vi is all smiles because dad let her have dessert before dinner

harrystylesfan4: BAHAHA HARRY'S A PUSHOVER LMAO

harrystylesfan6: can you blame him? look at that face🤏🏼🤏🏼🤏🏼

harrystylesfan2: she's so cute, but i feel like this is disrespectful to the styles family. like she should respect their privacy

harrystylesfan7: harry literally liked the post??

harrystylesfan1: i know ppl are always looking for reasons to hate on Y/n 🙄🙄

harrystyles: don't act like i'm the only one who can’t resist her charm

harrystylesfan4: so vianna runs the house basically

yourinstagram: pretty much 😂

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

yourinstagram

harrystyles, kaykaystyles, and 322,243 others liked this post

yourinstagram: HAPPY BIRTHDAY KAYA!! lots of x’s and o’s to this absolute GODDESS of a human being. you are so strong and so beautiful and so intelligent, just like your mama. can’t wait to see you grow and live and love. xxx

annetwist: happy birthday darling❤️

gemmastyles: happy birthday kaya!!

harrystyles: happy birthday to my baby. kissies xx

harrystylesfan10: SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP😭😭😭

harrystylesfan3: they’re such a cute little family but still being respectful to h’s first wife🥹🥹

niallhoran: happy birthday kay kay!

onedirectionfan5: NARRY

harryfan6: niall really is THE uncle to all the one direction kids

kaykaystyles: thank you, Y/n. best photographer ever:))

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

hsupdates

hsupdates: harry via instagram stories tonight!

harrystylesfan4: aww so cute!!!

harrystylesfan7: i love dadrry so much 🥹🥹

harrystylesfan11: i know i bet him and vianna and Y/n made it together 🥹

harrystylesfan8: oh to be harry's daughter *sigh*

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

kaykaystyles

harrystyles, yourinstagram, and 98,374 others liked this post

kaykaystyles: kinda gross but cute i guess

yourinstagram: KAYA

kaykaystyles: what? it’s true!

harrystylesfan8: lmao she called them out😂😂

harrystylesfan1: they're so cute tho 🥺

harrystylesfan4: i know i'm happy to see him happy again!!

harrystyles: i thought we talked about not posting embarrassing pictures of us🤨🤨

harrystylesfan3: harry using emojis just doesn't seem right to me

kaykaystyles: doesn't seem right to me either tbh. he's too old for that

harrystylesfan7: LMAO KAYA GET HIM QUEEN 💅🏼💅🏼

harrystyles: violet is now my favorite

harrystylesfan5: poor harry😂

harrystylesfan2: poor kaya has to put up with all of that

kaykaystyles: if you can't take a joke just say that. tpwk💕

harrystylesfan10: YES KAYA HERE YOU GO QUEEN👑👑👑

harrystylesfan7: i want to be her so bad😭

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

harrystyles

yourinstagram, kaykaystyles, and 1,348,898 others liked this post

harrystyles: my girlsss🥰🥰 it's not always been easy, but I am lucky to have each of you in my life xx. #internarionalwomensday

yourinstagram: why do you always try so hard to make me cry?? also why do my eyes look like that lmao

harrystyles: love youuu kissies☺️☺️

harrystyles: and you look beautiful by the way xx

harrystylesfan12: stooop they're so cute🥹🥹

harrystylesfan6: my parents😍😍

kaykaystyles: love you😚

harrystylesfan13: his girls🥺🥺

annetwist: three beautiful ladies❤️

harrystylesfan4: ANNE

harrystylesfan10: she's so sweet

harrystylesfan1: i'm so happy for all of them

[kpophubb]

Hi honey 🥰✉️

I found it ^^ the list to find myself hehe

How are you doing today? Did you have a good sleep ?

Also OMG I was ENFJ before like really long time ! And in 2022 I became ESFJ ( and I thought omg I’m same with Innie , Lixie and Minnie lol, but someone said Innies mbti changed 🥲😭🤧)

Im having such a weird day today 😂 like I wanna hang out with ppl but at the same time I want to be alone 😄😅 but I also want someone to take care of me sob sob 😭, but as it’s said in this song 🎶 “ lala I got nobody so I do it solo” 😅💀🤦🏻‍♀️😂

I’m happy you liked the song ! Ah I love Boa so much she has so many nice songs and MVs def check her MVs❣️

ITZY ? Ah I like Yeji too ^^ maybe have a lil crush on her and Yuna ~

As for fic idea what about Sunghoon ? Bitchy Hoonie or like too confident lmao or idk 💀😂😂😂 just those last gifs ahh and he was my first bias in ENHA , now I think he’s on a bias list again 🌝🌚 🔥

Your dream aw is soooo sweet OMG I just love listening to dreams with idols ! Recently I had one with Beomgyu and my mom lol😂🤧 I haven’t seen my mom since Feb and when I had an opportunity to talk to her and had some fam time with her I was trying to hook her on Kpop lol and beomguy is her fav in txt :) and in a dream she was like omg THIS IS MY SON IN LAW he’s so beautiful 😻😂😂😂 and literally she was praising him all the time 😅😂😂 so funny 😄

Is Taehyun your txt bias ?

Also I wanna recommend you a playlist of female Kpop artists (those are my fav songs) ; maybe u find something new for yourself

Also the height difference between Soobin and Hyunjin hehe 😅😅😂 & ——

That’s it have a nice day / evening / night 😘

🐁 anonie:)

Hi my lovie 🫶🏻💘🥺 I had a good but unproductive day today😂 how was your day dear?? Ah MBTI keep changing all the time for people istg. It’s just an overall view on your personality and as we are always changing and growing, MBTI also keeps altering. I don’t really pay that much attention to it😛 I just tested mine bc it seems like a popular question asked. And AH! We all have days like that don’t we? Where we wanna be alone and peaceful but we get lonely and want someone to shower us with affection and talk to us..such a human thing to do. For me, 80% of the time I like being by myself. It’s so peaceful. Despite being an extrovert and loving to interact with new people, I always keep a safe boundary and feel comfy being surrounded by myself! Yuna and yeji are always the dashing queen <3 I like them and itzy bc their vibe is really unique. I love COOL people the most, more than cute so I’m very attracted to itzy bc they’re such GIRL BOSSES. 🤩💯 I’ve heard of aespa and I’ll definitely check out the link you left me in our last ask. And HAHAHA I just choked on air LMAO true soobin and hyunjin..😆 Bahaha I’ll probs go with sunghoon bc I love the hyunjin x sunghoon agenda. Idk they both give me these possessive boyfie vibes I love it. I’ve written sunghoon x hyunjin crossovers in like two of my fics?? Do check them out if you want to hehe. One was called “when you fangirl too much over another idol” & another one was maybe “when they find out their crush is dating another idol”. Fluff and angst respectively.

And ah BEOMGYU 🥺🫶🏻🖤 pls he’s my favourite child in txt. HIS PERSONALITY!! Aaaah! He’s one of the funniest people I’ve met? He’s so crackheaded and I live for that. I love crackheaded, weird, childish, goofy people esp guys cause it’s just SOO CUTE <3 and ah na, tbh my first bias in txt is soobin??? His bunny nature </33 he’s just SOO CUTE and when his lips pout as he talks. I feel devastated. So adorable! But then I’m also really a simp for taehyun and gyu! Taehyun is so BOYFIE MATERIAL </3 and AWWW SUCH A SWEET DREAM🥹😍 son in law??! Ah!! WHAT A WINNING DREAM!! I had this previous dream about taehyun where we were about to almost kiss but gyu ruined it😂 (such a gyu thing to do isn’t it?). Anyway thank you my 🐁 anonie❣️ I’ll def check out the playlist and let you know <3 I’ll start working on your fic soon. I’m so glad I have a lot of time to write. My niece will be born tmrw so I’ll be buried in all the family attending, functions and friend meeting hehe! <3 WAITING TO HEAR FROM YOU AGAIN 💖🫶🏻

[misogirl828]

I’m so excited to read this chapter and sad that this is the last chapter of S&S. I have come to love Iden and Crosshair so much. I ADORE the redemptive arc you have given Crosshair, it’s 😘😘😘.

I also enjoy all the tiny details you put into your fic, juicy little tidbits that I revel in finding—a fanfic readers version of Easter eggs in movies 💗💗

This is kind of a stream of consciousness reblog from the three (!) pages of notes I took as I was reading this. 🥰🥰 Here goes…

💞Protective Uncle Wrecker! I loved how you wrote him here. Hovering and protective of Iden, moving folks out of her way, bringing her rations, and the look of pure terror when she started going into labor, and his concern that he may hurt the baby when he holds her~he has such a beautiful, kind heart💗💗

👉Iden, just DONE with being pregnant. Agree 💯 that pregnancy is often romanticized in fic. And after nine months of swollen feet, nausea, being uncomfortable, etc. I think Iden ABSOLUTELY would be over it. (Plus, she’s had enough of folks fussing around her.)

🥹 The reactions by TBB and Omega finding out from Crosshair that Iden is pregnant, that he and Iden are having a baby 😘😘😘 Especially when nervous Crosshair is telling Omega she’s going to be an aunt, and she’s already figured it out but doesn’t let on 💗💗

💖💖💖AHHHHHH! Chuckles, Arni and Nita!! I did a happy dance when they appeared!! And, WHAAAA?? Chuckles was BFFs with Howzer?!? Love this! That they were reunited 🥹🥹 and of course Howzer would go and rejoin the fight! (And that Chuckles would be THE FIRST to volunteer to get the people who got Howzer away from the Empire 🥹😘)

😆😏I just love, love, love how you write my favorite twins of chaos, Fives and Echo! Fives is alive baby and he and Echo are giving each other snark and creating havoc. Totally see Fives giving Nisa a hard time. His brothers don’t have a choice and to have someone who choose the Empire, even if for a short time, it doesn’t sit well with him. I wonder if this antagonism between them would eventually morph into something else?

😆Fives telling Crosshair that he’s as sweet as a tooka, according to Echo. The look I imagine on Crosshair’s face is PRICELESS.

👉I need a moment here—OMG OMG OMG! Omega, Arni and Nita training together?! EEEEEEE! That Omega and Arni have a special bond and they complement each other like yin and yang? ☯️ Love it! And my sweet Nita! Full of fire?!? A monster slayer to be (according to Iden).😘😘😘

💗Protective Dad Chuck, always whisking Arni and Nita away somewhere when Nisa is out of confinement. He can’t help himself. He loves his kids. He will do anything to protect them.

😆💯 Iden not realizing she’s in labor. But Omega figures it out immediately! I could totally see Iden chanting this to herself….

Don’t snap at the kid. Don’t snap at the kid.

💗💗💗 I ABSOLUTELY LOVED THE ENTIRE SECTION WITH IDEN GOING INTO LABOR AND THE SARCASTIC BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN HER AND CROSSHAIR (for some reason tumblr has decided to act up and f** up any copy/paste I try to do, so I’ve stopped trying.) Anyhow—Iden telling Crosshair he can choose, she’s either gonna rip off his arm or that of the medical droid, and Hunter with his karking bandanna—of course she means Tech! 🤣 And then Crosshair realizing that Iden is afraid. This strong, fearless woman who stared down an army~~feeling afraid and vulnerable. Makes Cross love her even more. He loves her strength and her vulnerability. (‘Thought it was the beautiful woman in your arms’ comment made me cackle)

🥹🥺💗 And Tech delivered their baby💗 And Iden telling Tech the name of their baby girl, Kestra, calling her Kes, named for the fallen former queen of Naboo—and Tech’s love—I’ve got big fat tears running down my face. It’s so sweet, so bittersweet and beautiful, it just choked me up.

💗💗This, just so many emotions from this: “Thank you” he breathed. “For what?” “For loving me. For her. For all of it.” Now I’m really bawling

💖💖Crosshair holding baby Kes on his bare chest. Such a beautiful image…

💞💞Introducing Kes to her Uncles and Aunts…Echo wanting to cover his cybernetic arm just to be sure he doesn’t pinch Kes, Hunter amazed at Kes’ eye color, it like theirs, Senna coming in with Nisa and telling Nisa “Come in, family’s meeting her first. And that’s you.” 🥹🥹🥹 Iden and Nisa talking about Nisa having a full head of hair when she was born and Nisa gifting Kes THE NECKLACE (when she’s old enough to wear it without trying to eat it) the silver leaf pendant 🥹💞

💗🥰💗🥰 Papa Crosshair taking Kes out to see the sunrise. Karrde, the last two paragraphs you wrote for this series, are SO POWERFUL, SO BEAUTIFUL, SO MOVING. Every time I read them, I get choked up and teary eyed.

“He’d cut his heart from his own chest if it meant hers would keep beating.” 🥹🥰

“It’s all for you, my little star.” 🥰♥️♥️

Bravo, my friend, for such an amazing series! For creating such an amazing Universe with fabulous OCs! I have thoroughly enjoyed this ride and love these characters and this story with all my heart! 🥰🥰🥰🥰 I will be rereading this series!!

Shadows and Shades - Part 17 (FINAL PART)

Master List | Previous Part

A/N: WELL, THIS IS IT! The last chapter! I fell in love with this fic and these characters more than I thought I would, and I have had the last page of this written for FOREVER. I am so very excited to share it now with you all! As always, I have to thank @teletraan-meets-jarvis for being an absolutely phenomenal beta reader and friend. These fics don't happen without TJ, and she makes them so much better. SO THANK YOU, TJ! YOU ARE THE BEST, AND I ADORE YOU, DEAR FRIEND!

Warnings: pregnancy, childbirth

“Oi! Out of the way! Can’t you see she’s pregnant? Make room, ya nerf herders!”

Iden bit back the sigh that was threatening to erupt out of her as Wrecker shooed a group of young rebels from their seats at one of the tables in the mess hall. Only one of them dared toss a glare over their shoulder at the massive clone.

“Got somethin’ to say?” Wrecker growled.

“Easy big guy,” Iden teased, patting his arm. “I think they got the message.” She inhaled deeply before heaving one leg over the bench to straddle it. The tables were frustratingly not accommodating for someone whose stomach was the size of an overinflated bolo-ball, but sitting down was something of a relief nonetheless. Wrecker hovered behind her as she lowered herself down, his hands ready to catch her at any moment, and for once, Iden allowed herself to grip his hand as she plopped onto the bench.

I’m really ready for this to be over.

Iden had never understood the ‘beauty’ of pregnancy, never being one to fall under the illusion that it was some magical experience where you just flitted about and then one day a baby for the entire galaxy to fawn over just appeared in your arms. However, even having a reasonable set of expectations hadn’t prepared her for the way her body had stretched and changed to accommodate their child. The nausea she’d experienced the first few months seemed like a gracious reprieve compared to the back pain, swollen feet, weird cravings, and constant need to urinate.

Oh, and she was still nauseous regularly.

“I’ll go get your food and be right back,” Wrecker reassured her before jogging off. She allowed herself to lean one arm on the table, patting her belly with her other hand.

“I’m so tired of this. A few weeks to go still, but I think I’ve had enough.”

She’d never really gotten used to the constant fussing and accommodations. Iden was used to being self-sufficient, almost to a detrimental point, but it had become quickly apparent she was going to have to get used to asking for help. She’d even briefly considered asking Crosshair to wait to tell everyone else she was pregnant until she was unable to hide it, if nothing else but to spare herself the hovering and worrying, but when she saw how excited he was the first night back on Yavin 4, she knew she couldn’t possibly deprive him of that.

Hunter’s mouth had fallen open in shock, Echo had grinned like a fiend, letting out a loud bark of a laugh, and Wrecker had practically started bawling on the spot. Even Tech had looked up from what he was tinkering with to offer congratulations, and then had immediately launched into a barrage of medical questions.

With the slew of varied reactions from his brothers, Omega had been Iden’s favorite. She had walked in in the middle of everyone digesting the news, immediately understanding that she’d missed some piece of important information. Her eyes had glided over to Crosshair, and then to Iden, briefly flicking down to look at her belly before meeting her gaze. She stifled a smile.

Maker alive, she’s picking up on things quickly, Iden had thought. Senna must be pleased.

Crosshair hadn’t seemed to notice Omega’s perceptiveness, striding over to her and resting his hands on her shoulders. “I have something to tell you, and I hope you’ll be excited.” Iden had to stifle a giggle at the way he suddenly got nervous. She knew that he loved the kid, even if he didn’t show it in a conventional way. The two of them had a unique relationship, one that existed more in the quiet space and unspoken words when they were just sitting next to one another, but this moment was different for him. Omega smiled up expectantly, waiting for him to tell her what she’d already figured out.

“You’re going to be an aunt, Omega. Iden’s pregnant.”

Iden had to give it to the kid, she played it perfectly, squealing with excitement and flinging her arms around Crosshair’s waist. He hesitated for a moment before returning the hug, smiling to himself. Omega met Iden’s eyes, and Iden had winked at her, mouthing a thank you.

The months had dragged on since then, and with every day, she found some new annoyance with how her body was changing. She’d been determined to not allow her body to lose its strength and endurance, going running daily until she’d been forced to switch to walking. Senna had accompanied her every day, dragging her out when she didn’t want to mentally go. “This is important to you, and I can’t help you in many ways, but I can do this. Let’s at least go do a lap around the tarmac and we can come right back in,” she’d urged on one of the days where Iden was feeling at her lowest and most frustrated. They’d done three laps before Iden had begged off to waddle to the refresher.

Everyone had been wonderful. Well, mostly everyone. Chuckles, the clone pilot that had picked them up, was still a bit distant. She’d seen him spending time with his two children, a teenage Twi’lek and a young Pantoran. Both of the younglings seemed to have adjusted well to their new surroundings, but Chuckles constantly seemed ready to bolt. Senna had quietly relayed their story on one of their walks, how Chuckles’s inhibitor chip hadn’t activated, how he’d managed to save the two younglings that had become his adopted family, and how they’d been running ever since.

“He’s been doing nothing but looking over his shoulder for the last few years,” Senna had said quietly. “I can understand his reluctance to relax. I just hope with time, he’ll find a place here.” She’d leaned over, nudging Iden’s shoulder. “But I have to tell you, since he may not; he was very grateful that the two of you got Howzer out.” 

“They knew each other?” 

“They were apparently best friends during the war. He’d assumed Howzer was dead or serving the Empire. When he showed up here… well, to put it mildly, Chuckles was beside himself. I’m not sure I’ve seen a more emotional reunion. When he found out we were going to rescue the two people that had busted his friend out, he was the first one to volunteer as a pilot.” 

Iden had smiled to herself. If nothing else, at least we did that much good. She’d been sad not to find the former clone captain at the base when they arrived. Hunter had told her that he hadn’t stayed long. When he found out the Twi’lek general he’d served alongside during the war had escaped Ryloth with his family, Howzer had decided to go looking for them to carry on the fight. She sighed. 

“Echo’s brother certainly seemed to have no issue adjusting.”

Senna had laughed at that. “Fives is a different story altogether.”

Iden huffed a laugh. “That he is.”

Fives had hovered awkwardly in the background when they returned, clearly not sure where he fit with these new people. He’d watched his twin interact with Crosshair, gripping his arm in greeting, and Iden had noticed a slight scowl on his face. But with time, Fives had gotten around to greeting both of them, and clumsily, he’d thanked Crosshair quietly for rescuing Echo.

“Without you and your squad, I wouldn’t have gotten a second chance to razz him at any given opportunity,” the former ARC trooper said, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.

“He clearly didn’t tell you what I said on the mission,” Crosshair joked dryly.

“Oh, he did,” Fives replied. “Says you can be a bit of a prick, but you’re really sweet as a tooka. You just don’t want people to think that.”

Iden had burst out laughing at the way Crosshair’s nose wrinkled with disgust.

Nisa’s reception had been far more chilly. She was still unconscious when they arrived, and they’d carefully placed her on a gurney to be moved to one of the few small cells they kept on the base just in case. Every day for the first few weeks she was there, she was only taken out of her cell to be interrogated for hours on end. Hunter and Senna led most of the interrogations, grilling her sister about every tidbit of Imperial intelligence she could provide. Iden had been torn about whether or not to at least listen in, but Crosshair had offered to observe and relay anything important.

“We need to minimize the amount of duress you put yourself under,” he’d insisted. “Let me worry about Nisa. You go make yourself useful elsewhere.”

And she had. With Echo and Wrecker’s help, they’d completely audited every piece of weaponry and equipment on the base. She’d helped Tech repair everything from a squeaky bench in the mess to the Marauder’s hyperdrive, which always seemed to be on the fritz. She’d asked Senna if she could observe Omega’s training, wanting to ensure she could also be as helpful as her brothers if needed. She’d been astounded to watch Omega, the Twi’lek Arni, and the young Pantoran Nita train together. The three of them appeared to have grown attached to each other quickly, especially Omega and Arni, who seemed to have a particularly special bond. Where Arni was anxious and a perfectionist, Omega was encouraging and gentle. Nita on the other hand, was a force to be reckoned with, and Iden adored the spark that burned within her.

I hope my child has a fraction of her fire. That one’s a monster slayer to be sure.

After a few months, Senna and Hunter had agreed to allow Nisa a few more freedoms. She was allowed outside of her room with supervision, and occasionally joined Senna and Iden for their walks. But just because Senna and Hunter had decided to trust her didn’t mean that trust permeated the remainder of the base. She noted that Arni and Nita were frequently nowhere to be found on the days Nisa was allowed out, having been shuffled off somewhere by Chuckles with some mumbled excuse. Many of the rebels would glare in Nisa’s general direction when she’d walk through the mess hall. Fives in particular had been the most upset at the decision to have Nisa on base, and while Iden could somewhat understand why after what had happened to him, his animosity towards her sister still annoyed her. At times, he was a downright bully.

Several months in, they’d been walking through the mess when Fives had approached, clearly pretending to be distracted by something else. He’d dropped his shoulder and rammed Nisa, sending her lunch tray lurching against her chest, spilling food down the front of her and onto the floor.

“Oops.”

Nisa clenched her fists, glaring at him. Fives had returned the stare, seemingly bored with the entire exchange, but his anger and intention was clear. Iden was on him in a second. She’d charged forward, shoving him roughly.

“She didn’t put you in that tube, you fucking mynock.”

Fives stepped forward, glaring down at Iden, and at that point, Echo had reached the escalating situation, pushing his brother back as Crosshair had come sprinting across the mess with murder in his gaze.

“Enough Fives,” Echo snarled.

“She shouldn’t be here. And you kriffing know it,” his twin bit back, his amber irises practically glowing. “She’s one of them. And she went willingly.” He turned to Nisa, his voice raising. “Our brothers didn’t have a choice. You did.” He bumped against Echo, who was trying to keep him at bay while also pressing a palm to Iden’s shoulder to keep her back, shooting a pleading look at Crosshair, who seemed satisfied to let Iden go toe-to-toe with the former ARC trooper. 

Senna appeared suddenly, stepping in front of Fives and placing her hands on his chest. Her blue eyes were alight and she was speaking to him in a quiet but angry tone. Iden couldn’t hear what was being said, but it was enough to draw Fives’s attention. He glared at her for a moment before his expression softened and Iden could see some of the tension leave his body. Senna said a few more things to him before patting him on the shoulder and glancing over at Echo, who took his cue, grabbing Fives by the arm and dragging him away.

Senna watched him go before stooping to help Crosshair and Iden clean up the mess on the floor. Nisa’s fists were still clenched at her sides. She unleashed a shaky breath.

“You didn’t deserve that,” Iden muttered.

“It’s going to take time,” Crosshair rasped. “More so with some than others. Although that was underhanded.”

“Fives has his reasons. They’re not necessarily the right reasons, but he’s still healing,” Senna said quietly. “You’re just an outlet for his anger right now.”

“I’m an easy target,” Nisa agreed. “I’m the closest thing to the Empire that he can take a swing at.” She sighed. “I don’t need him to like me. I just need him to tolerate me being here.”

Senna gave her a half-hearted smirk. “He burns a little hotter than Echo does, but he’ll come around. Eventually.”

Nisa sighed again. “We’ll see.”

That all seemed so long ago as Iden readjusted again on the bench, trying to get comfortable on the stiff seating in the mess hall. At least then, I could bend at the waist. Now everything’s an ungraceful squat or waddle.

Wrecker was making his way back towards her, and she tried to hide the frown of disappointment at the rations that she could see on the trays he was carrying. Fucking protein bars again and whatever that sour shit is. They were due for a new shipment of supplies and rations, and she internally made a note to make her way down to the store room as soon as it arrived to claim at least a few choice snacks for herself.

She grunted in frustration as she shifted again, the back pain that she’d been noticing all morning intensifying again, and she gripped the table a little tighter for a moment, exhaling sharply. Wrecker set the tray down in front of her before sliding into the seat across from her.

“Sorry. Couldn’t find the chocolate thing you like so much.”

She gave him a pained smile as the pain finally abated a bit. “S’alright, Wreck. I appreciate the effort.”

“You alright? You look like you’re sweating a bit.”

“Yeah, was just a cramp.”

Omega entered the hall with Arni in tow, the two of them chattering excitedly to one another. The young clone spotted Iden and her brother, and her eyes lit up. She bid a hurried goodbye to her Twi’lek friend before making her way over, plopping down next to Wrecker.

“How’s the baby?”

“On my last nerve,” Iden grunted, shifting again as the muscles in her back seemed to rebel again.

“You alright?”

“Yeah, just a back spasm.”

“She had one a few minutes ago too,” Wrecker commented. “Seems like they’ve been happening all morning.”

Omega’s eyes widened. “Iden… have they been happening at regular intervals?”

“No. Well, I don’t know. My back’s just hurting non-stop, but if I could just get shifted here-“ Iden rocked against the bench again, trying to find a position that was more comfortable. “I had it a second ago, and now… kriff.” She sat back and sighed in frustration. “I’m so ready for this to be done.”

Omega’s brows were furrowed as she watched Iden carefully. She punched something on the comm on her wrist.

“What did you just do?” Iden asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Nothing.”

“You’re a shit liar, kid.”

Wrecker nudged Omega, and the young clone ducked her head slightly. “I… I’m timing your back spasms. You’re far along enough to where… well, they might not be spasms Iden.”

Iden stared at her for a moment before her exhaustion-addled brain pieced together what Omega was implying. “You… you think I’m in labor?”

“It’s possible.”

Iden shifted again, grimacing as another spasm gripped her. Omega punched a button on her wrist. Iden rocked around again, trying to find a way to get the pain to stop, suddenly gripped with a bit of panic. “Th-the droid said I had another week or two to go.”

“I thought you wanted this to be over.”

“Yes, well the thing standing between me and this pregnancy being over happens to be childbirth, and I hadn’t exactly worked my way up to being ready for that.” The pain relented, and she relaxed. “See, just gotta find the right spot. It’s just a spasm.”

Omega clearly wasn’t convinced. “Maybe I should comm Crosshair.”

“No, don’t bother him,” Iden replied, beginning to become more annoyed. “He didn’t take his comm with him this morning anyway. Wanted Tech to fix something on it that had been giving him trouble.”

“All the more reason to go and find him then, don’t you think?” Omega tried again, growing more insistent. “Wrecker can go and I could stay with you.”

Iden bit off a piece of the ration bar, trying to keep her annoyance in check. Don’t snap at the kid. Don’t snap at the kid. She chewed quickly, swallowing just as another wave of pain hit her, and she fought the urge to vomit the foul-tasting ration right back up. “No! No, it’s fine.” The pitch and volume of her voice was rising quickly, starting to draw attention from the few others in the hall. The spasm passed, and Iden struggled to push herself to her feet. Wrecker stood to help her, but she hastily waved him off.

“Iden, they’re coming every two minutes,” Omega said quietly. “Like clockwork. You should at least go down to the medbay and get looked at.”

“I’m FINE.” Iden finally snapped. “I-I just need to go lie down.”

To her absolute horror, Iden felt a gush of warmth between her legs and looked down in time to see the front of her trousers quickly becoming soaked. The rush of fluid continued for what felt like an eternity, and when it was done, Iden was standing in her own personal puddle, mortified. She looked up to see a look of pure terror on Wrecker’s face. Omega was already standing and frantically waving Arni over.

“It’s alright, your water just broke,” she assured Iden. “We’ll find him. Wrecker, get her to the medbay. Carry her if you have to.”

Iden looked down as another contraction hit, nearly bringing her to her knees.

Shit.

---

Crosshair shouldn’t have been surprised by the sheer amount of chaos in the medbay, and yet, somehow he was. A med droid went wheeling past him quickly followed by a metal tray that he just managed to duck as he stepped into the tiny room Omega had led him to. The tray crashed against the wall outside, and the droid tried to utter some sort of what he assumed was an apology, but it was drowned out by shouting coming from inside the room. Wrecker was notably absent, and Crosshair assumed he’d already fled. Iden, on the other hand, was sitting up in the bed in a medical gown that was falling off one shoulder, hair stuck to her sweaty forehead, swearing loudly.

“AND DON’T FUCKING COME BACK WITHOUT HIM, YOU KRIFFING BUCKET OF BOLTS!”

Crosshair glanced at Omega, who was right behind him. She had a hand clapped over her mouth, clearly trying to stifle a giggle. Iden was panting, but her expression softened as he stepped into the room. 

“I see things are going well in here then,” he stated evenly. 

“I just don’t want to have one more cold, metallic instrument shoved up inside me or poking me,” Iden grunted. “And if I hear one more time what‘isn’t advisable’, I’m going to break its arm off and beat it with it.” 

“Perhaps it’s worthwhile to listen to the droid engineered to provide medical care.”

Iden glared at him. “I’m not choosy about whose arm I rip off at this point, dear. Are you sure you want to run that risk?” She readjusted, her knuckles tightening on the sides of the bed as her face contorted in pain. Crosshair stepped to the side of the bed, trying to figure out how to help her, but she waved him off, swearing loudly. His heart clenched at seeing her in so much pain. 

“Did the droid give you meds?” 

“No,” she snarled. “Turns out, that’s something coming on the new shipment. We are currently fresh out, so I’m just going to have to feel this.” 

“Alright, what else can I do?”

“Make sure that kriffing droid brings your brother back in here.”

“Tech?”

“No, Hunter. He and his karking bandana will be so useful right now. OF COURSE, TECH.” 

He raised his hands in surrender, looking back at Omega with a silent plea. She nodded, taking the hint. “I’ll go find him.” With that, she slipped out of the room, leaving the two of them alone.

Crosshair pulled up a stool from the corner of the room to sit by the bed. “Did the droid at least tell you how much longer you have to go?”

Iden sighed. “I suppose that’s the one bit of good news. I apparently have been laboring for a while and didn’t want to face reality. It sounds like it won’t be much longer.” Something in her voice gave him pause, he couldn’t pinpoint exactly what. He leaned forward, slipping his fingers into hers.

“What is it?” he asked, and when she finally met his eyes, he saw what was bothering her: Iden was afraid. There were so few times Iden had ever been truly vulnerable around him. This was the woman that had faced down an entire Imperial army and threatened to kill Saw Gerrera in her own living room. But now, he could see it, but he knew naming it would shame her, so he took a different tack. 

“You know you can do this, right?”

Iden huffed. “I have spent so much of my life struggling to stay in control, and now, I have to let go and allow my body to do what eons of evolution has prepared it to do, but… it’s still… unnerving.”

He grinned, kissing her knuckles. “You’ve gone toe-to-toe with an AT-AT and just about every authority figure we’ve run into. This will be a walk in the park for you. And you’re not going to do it alone.”

She raised an eyebrow. “I don’t see your body having a complete cramp every few minutes, or were you saving all your strength for the push?” She laughed dryly. “No, no dear, I think this one is on me.”

“You know what I mean.”

“Of course I do, but sarcasm is how I’m coping at the moment.” Just then, another contraction wracked Iden, and she swore loudly as its intensity grew. Crosshair bit the inside of his cheek as she clamped onto his hand. The joints in his knuckles creaked, and he fought back a smile despite the pain. 

“What�� what the hell is so funny?” Iden gasped. 

“I was just remembering the last time you were breaking my fingers,” he said quietly. “In the back of that speeder as we escaped Theed. Echo was trying to set your leg after a blaster had blown clear through your knee. I was quite honestly shocked you were still conscious.”

“I’ve been known to have a high tolerance,” Iden replied, some of the pain clearly starting to abate. He could see her body relax, no longer bracing against the contraction. 

Crosshair placed his palm on her sweaty forehead, brushing some of her hair out of her eyes. “I was amazed at your strength then, Iden. I think that’s where things started to turn for me.”

Her eyes glittered teasingly. “What, it wasn’t the fact that you were holding a beautiful woman in your arms?”

Crosshair chuckled. “That didn’t hurt either.” Leaning forward, he captured her lips with his before pressing his forehead against hers. “You’re going to make an incredible mother.” 

She cupped his cheek, a tear leaking from the inner corner of her eye and tracing down her nose. “And you’re going to be a wonderful father.” 

Another contraction shattered the moment, and Iden braced herself again. “It feels like it’s time. Where the fuck are they?” She groaned, reaching for him again, and he gave her his hand, trying to keep his face neutral as he felt the joint in at least one finger pop. 

“Focus on your breathing, Iden. Just a little longer, I’m sure.” 

She muttered something he didn’t quite catch, but he assumed she was cursing someone, probably him. “Are you excited to tell them her name?” he asked, trying to distract her. 

They’d known the sex of the baby for a while, but had decided to keep it to themselves along with the name they’d chosen. Iden opened one eye to look at him, nodding. “I hope it’s a good one for our little monster slayer.” 

He smiled. “If she’s anything like her namesake, it’ll be perfect.” 

Footsteps in the hallway drew Crosshair’s attention, and he turned in time to see Omega sprinting back into the room with Tech close on her heels. “I really must stress that a medical droid has more expertise in this area than I-”

“Do you know how to deliver a baby, Tech?” Iden interrupted, any semblance of patience clearly having left her.

“In principle, yes, however, seeing as the majority of my experience was in combat on specialized missions, I didn’t exactly-”

“I don’t care. Get down there and let’s do this.” 

Tech looked at Crosshair, who shrugged. His brother sighed, adjusting his goggles and walking over to the supply cabinet to gather some items. 

“Very well.” 

—

In a matter of minutes and only a few pushes, it was over, and Tech was holding their daughter, rubbing her down with a towel and clipping her umbilical cord. He glanced up from beneath Iden’s knees, smiling wide. “It’s a girl,” he breathed. “Congratulations.” The little girl in his hands began squalling, and he quickly moved to clean her off a bit more before placing her on Iden’s chest. “I will need to scan her to be thorough, but based on a preliminary glance she seems healthy.” As he turned away, Iden gripped his arm. Tech turned back to her, a confused expression crossing his face as he looked back and forth between her and Crosshair, who was smiling with glistening eyes. 

“What is it?” he asked.

Iden’s face was covered in sweat and tears, but she smiled up at him, panting. “I’m glad you were the first one to meet her, Tech. I’d like to introduce you to your niece, Kestra. It’s not an exact match on the name, but we plan to call her Kes for short.” 

Tech’s throat bobbed as he swallowed hard, his eyes misting behind his goggles. There was no doubt who they had named their daughter after, the former queen of Naboo that had died defending her world, the woman that they all had fought for and been inspired by. The woman that Tech had loved. “That… that’s a perfect name. She’s perfect,” Tech said quietly. Leaning over, he took a blanket from where he’d laid out the supplies, gently draping it over Kestra. “Th-thank you,” he stuttered out, “for allowing me to be here and meet her.” 

Iden reached out, clasping his hand and giving it a squeeze. He squeezed back before moving over to begin calibrating the medical scanner. 

Crosshair leaned over Iden’s shoulder, taking in his daughter’s face. She had a full head of hair, chubby cheeks, and was smacking her lips in between breaths. Reaching forward, he gently took one of her tiny hands in between his fingers, and her eyes snapped open, looking directly at him. Iden’s breath caught in her throat. 

“She has your eyes. I’d know that eye color anywhere,” she whispered. 

Crosshair stared at his daughter. “She has so much of both of us.” He realized his cheeks were wet with tears, but he couldn’t be bothered to care. “Tech’s right. She’s perfect.” He turned, kissing Iden, and she reached up to cup his face. 

“Thank you,” he breathed. 

Iden rested her forehead against his. “For what?”

“For loving me. For her. For all of it.” 

—

It didn’t take long for word to travel around the base, and after a few hours, Iden was finally feeling up to having visitors. Hunter, Echo, Wrecker, and Omega had been hovering in the hall, and when Tech finally opened the door to allow them in, they all stepped inside cautiously. 

“She won’t break by you being here,” Iden teased. “Come on in.”

Crosshair sat in a chair next to the bed with his shirt open, cradling his daughter in his arms against his bare chest. Tech had coached him through how to properly hold an infant, and after only a few scowls and muttered comments, the sniper had mastered it. Iden had watched the two of them quietly, her heart feeling as though it could burst. She was still sore despite Tech doing his best to make her comfortable, and she felt as though she could sleep for three rotations, but in this moment, everything was perfect. 

I never could have imagined what this would be like. Never in my wildest dreams. I’m so terrified, but so overwhelmed with happiness. 

Crosshair stood, bouncing his daughter slightly as he stepped towards his brothers, pulling the blanket back from her face. She yawned sleepily before opening her eyes to stare wide-eyed at her uncles and aunt. 

“This is Kestra,” Crosshair said quietly. “My… my daughter.” 

Hunter placed his hand on his brother’s shoulder as he leaned over the little girl. “Congratulations to you both.” 

“Would you like to hold her?” 

Hunter looked at him for a moment before smiling and nodding. Crosshair carefully wrapped the blanket around Kestra in a swaddle and shifted her into Hunter’s arms. The sergeant smiled down at her as she stared up at him. “Her eyes. They’re.. they’re ours.” 

“Yeah. Yeah they are.”

Kestra met each of her uncles and Omega in turn. Echo was nervous cradling her with his cybernetic, insisting on wrapping his metal limb in a blanket so that he wouldn’t pinch her with a joint inadvertently. Omega held her next, speaking quietly to her and smiling down at her. Wrecker was last. 

“Don’t think I should,” he said quietly. “She’s so little. I-I-I don’t want to… to hurt her.” 

“You won’t,” Omega reassured him. 

Wrecker’s brow furrowed deeper, and he recoiled slightly as Omega approached him. Crosshair took his daughter from Omega, holding her out to Wrecker. “You hold explosive equipment all the time that is far more risky to drop than she is.” 

“I don’t want to hurt-”

“You won’t. Now, sit down if you’re nervous.” Iden scooted over in her bed, patting the mattress next to her. Wrecker ducked his head sheepishly before sitting down next to her. He reached over, taking her hand. 

“Are you alright?”

“I’ve been better, but not the worst shape I’ve been in,” Iden joked, squeezing his hand. “Sorry I gave you a fright earlier. Appreciate you getting me here. Even if I was swearing the entire way.” 

Wrecker grinned for a moment before Crosshair stood in front of him. “Hold out your hands.” 

The large clone did as he was told, and Crosshair gently placed Kestra into his massive palms, making minor adjustments to support her where needed. Then he stepped back. “There. See. Not so bad.” 

Wrecker was staring down at the tiny life form in his hands, and Kestra watched him with equal intensity before gurgling and smiling at him. “She… she’s not afraid of me,” he said quietly. “Thought the scar and the eye might put ‘er off, but she doesn’t seem to care.” 

“Technically, newborns can only see a distance of up to-” Echo interrupted Tech’s lecture with a shoulder nudge, shaking his head as his brother glared at him, readjusting his goggles.

A soft knock at the door drew their attention, and Iden turned to find Senna standing in the door. 

“May we come in?” 

Iden nodded, and the Jedi stepped inside followed by a hesitant Nisa. Her sister was fidgeting with something in her hands and chewing her lip as she approached the bed. Senna was already leaning over the infant in Wrecker’s arms, stroking her cheeks with a finger. 

“She’s beautiful, you two.” 

Wrecker carefully started to hand her to Senna, but the Jedi backed away, reaching back to motion Nisa closer. “Come meet your niece.” Iden could see her sister’s hesitation as her eyes scanned the room, taking in all the faces around her. She extended her hand. 

“Come on, family’s meeting her first. And that’s you.” 

Nisa bobbed her head, stepping forward. Wrecker held Kestra out to her, and she took her, gently cradling her. Wrecker moved out of the way so that Nisa could take his place on the bed next to Iden, and she sat gingerly down next to her sister. The room was quiet aside from Kestra’s gurgles and coos as Nisa studied her carefully. 

“She’s got so much hair,” she commented after a few moments. 

“You had that much too when you came,” Iden said quietly. “Mom always told me I came in bald as a barren moon, but you had a full head of hair.” 

Nisa nodded, her eyes glistening. Readjusting Kestra, she produced the item she’d been fidgeting with, letting it fall from her fingers. The silver leaf pendant dangled just above the baby, and Kestra watched it swing back and forth with apparent interest. 

“I think she should have this,” Nisa said. “If that’s alright with you. Not right now of course. I hear babies put everything in their mouths. But when she’s older.” 

Iden’s eyes shone as she reached for the necklace. “I think that’s a wonderful idea.” 

Nisa nodded, smiling at her sister. “It belongs in your family. This family.”

Iden reached forward, gripping her sister’s hand tightly. 

“Our family, Anisia.”  

Her sister looked around the room, and to her surprise found warm smiles and nods. She huffed a quiet laugh. 

“I’d like that, I think. To have a family again.” 

Iden’s voice broke as she replied. 

“Me too.”

—

Crosshair sat next to Iden’s bed in the medical suite that she’d been in since delivering Kestra a few rotations ago. It was the most at peace he’d seen her in a while, and he leaned forward to gently brush some of the hair out of her face. Her nose wrinkled at the slight tickle, but she did not wake. He stood and stretched, his limbs popping as he interlaced his fingers and reached upward. He’d been sleeping on a cot on the floor of the medical suite, waking to feed, change, and comfort Kestra as much as he could to give Iden a reprieve, but he hoped that their sleeping arrangements would change soon. Senna and Hunter had told him that they’d found a small store room to convert into a tiny one-room dwelling for the three of them for when Iden was medically cleared. 

“Figured you would want some privacy,” Hunter had said quietly, “while you adjust to being parents.” 

“And so that the crying baby won’t keep everyone else up,” Crosshair joked. 

“You know damn well we’ll all be clamoring to take turns helping out,” Senna replied, jabbing him in the shoulder. “All you have to do is ask, and we’ll be there. You don’t have to do this alone if you don’t want to.” 

He had nodded gratefully. “That was never in the cards, I don’t think.” 

Now, as he relaxed his shoulders, he turned to glance over at the chrono, noting it was almost dawn, and a thought occurred to him. Turning to the makeshift crib Omega had put together, he watched his daughter stir before opening her amber eyes and staring up at him with wide-eyed wonder.

“What do you say you and I go see your first sunrise, little star?”

Kestra gurgled in response, and he huffed a quiet laugh before carefully lifting her out of the crib and tucking her against his shoulder. With one hand, he typed out a quick note to Iden on the datapad on her bedside table to tell her where they’d gone before he quietly slipped out the door and trudged down the hall.

The base was completely silent, no one even beginning to stir in any of the common areas or the mess hall, and Crosshair was secretly glad. It was a relief to finally leave the tiny room, and he couldn’t explain why, but he wanted this moment with his daughter for himself. Punching the unlock code for the main hangar door, he stepped out into the dim early morning haze. The air was a little cool, and he hugged Kestra closer to his chest, but the infant seemed unphased in her warm swaddling of blankets, cooing away and dribbling into the fabric of his shirt. He smirked.

“Quite the drooler, aren’t you?”

Kestra appeared to agree, giggling at him, and he smiled down at her. Crosshair made his way to the edge of the tarmac before carefully sitting down, cradling his daughter gently in his hands. He knew this wasn’t a moment that she’d ever remember, but it was one he’d never forget.

The sun gently crested the horizon, the golden rays sparkling in Kestra’s locks that were poking out of the blanket she was wrapped in. He still couldn’t believe she’d been born with a full head of hair, and he carefully ran his fingers through the delicate curls. The little girl turned her face towards the sunlight, smiling widely before turning back to stare at her father.

Crosshair stared back at her, committing her face to memory. He knew she’d grow at a normal human rate, Tech had confirmed it, but it would still be too fast, and before long, the baby girl that was staring up at him with wonder and curiosity would be lost to time. His eyes prickled at the thought, and he blinked rapidly, trying to clear the mist. 

And thanks to Tech’s treatment, I’ll get to see all of it. A full life of watching her grow. Of watching the person she’ll become. My little monster slayer.

Kestra wriggled one of her tiny arms loose from her blanket and before he could re-swaddle her, she wrapped her hand around his thumb, gripping tightly. A lump rose in his throat as he looked down at her, staring into the eyes they shared. He’d never really cared much for children, but this little girl was his, and he knew that he’d cut his heart from his own chest if it meant hers would keep beating. He loved her more than he’d ever loved another person or thing, even his Firepuncher, which he was certain Iden would tease him about relentlessly, but in this moment, he couldn’t care less.

“All of this is for you, you know,” he said quietly. “The rebellion. This fight. I never really saw the reason for it, always thinking it was a waste of time and effort to stand up to the Empire, but now, I know who it’s really for. It’s for you, Kestra. So that you can grow up in a better galaxy than your mother and I did.” His voice cracked as he tipped his face down, pressing a gentle kiss to his daughter’s forehead before resting his against hers. “It’s all for you, my little star. So that you can have the life you deserve. I’ll do anything to give you that.”

A/N: THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR READING!

Tag List: @seriowan @partoftheeternalsoul @rosmariner @misogirl828 @ellichonkasaurusrex @zoeykallus @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond @gjrain20-starwars @dsburnerblog @staycalmandhugaclone @redheadgirl @fordo-kixed-rex @wizardofrozz @moonstrider9904 @rain-on-kamino @ladykatakuri @sleepingsun501

[cherrypeaking]

good morning~ how’s my beautiful woman doing? 🥺🩵 i hope you slept well~

i took a preemptive pain killer to drive my cramps away but somehow my body didn’t get the memo so my cramps started coming at full force 😭😭 it was so bad that i tried to get up and run away from the pain but you can’t run from the pain if it’s in your body 😭😭😭😭 so now i’m laying in bed trying to recover djshhss

i’m looking back at our conversation from earlier and it’s so wonderful that we’re so comfortable around each other 🥺🥺🩵🩵 it had me yearning to be by your side already 🥺🩵

aaah i can’t stop thinking about you baby i want to hold your hand and kiss your knuckles >//< i wanna do a bunch of romantic stuff with you 🥺🩵🩵 it’s so funny that we both related to anti romantic so much at one point and now look at us 😭😭 we went from anti romantic to hydrangea love hehe 🤭🩵🩵🩵 it’s funny but it’s also so beautiful and it makes me so glad that we took our time with each other 🥺 i would’ve waited however long for you~ i knew i only wanted you before you even asked what we were djshhs 😳😳👉🏾👈🏾🩵 you’re a lot braver than you let on honestly!! i know you get shy and nervous a lot but you’re so brave to me baby 🥺🥺 so brave and strong and powerful~ i admire you so much 🥺 my baby’s simply the coolest~ 🥺🩵🩵

(taehyun as THEE baby star 🥺🥺⭐️⭐️ i couldn’t choose one pic of tyun or one jirachi pic so here’s a rare 4 pic collage :3)

in other news, i think twitter is back up now so i can go back to tagging you in cute stuff :3 but that app is on its last strike with me idk how much longer i can take the muskrat screwing it over and changing things that never needed to be changed :/ but ultimately it’s okay if i leave twitter bc i have you and a perfectly loving community here on tumblr dot corn 🥺🥺🩵🩵 and as much as this site has its own problems the love and community i’ve found here is worth more than anything any dim witted ceo could mess up 🥹🥹🫶🏾🫶🏾🩵🩵

i love you so much my love~ as always, i hope you have a great day!! i’m here rooting for you my love, my little fairy princess 🥺🩵

P.S look at our themes side by side we’re literally so cute 😭😭😭🩵🩵🩵

my love 🥺🥺🩷 getting to read your ask really made me feel better… and talking to you ultimately… like i told you i woke up from a nightmare but i feel way better thanks to you 🥺🥺🩷 i just had my caramel coffee~ it’s funny that even though you don’t really like coffee, my caramel coffee always makes me think of you 🤭🩷

hmhm :(( i feel like it happens to me too like some period cramps are so painful all you can do is sleep it off?? i’m so sorry like why do we have to go through this :(( im so glad you’re feeling better… mommy deserves kisses and tummy rubs 🥺🥺

i loved our conversation as well >\\\< it was so cute and just like you i love that we get to communicate and feel comfortable to share everything 🥺🥺🩷

mommy 🥺🥺 i would love that so much… i do get lots of romantic thoughts about you my sweetie pie 🥺🥺🩷 please i do find it so funny cause antiromantic was basically my jam i was thinking no bye i’m not going for relationships anymore 😑 and then i met you 🥺🥺🩷 it’s so cute that you think that i’m brave >\\\< i was actually very excited and nervous and anxious and trying to know exactly when i’d be ready 🥺🥺 i want to live what we have to the fullest and that’s when i decided to ask you out 👉👈🩷 to me you’re really the coolest and strongest, my girlfriend is the best 🥺🥺🩷 i remember you were saying the same, no more relationships or maybe just one but then i’m done and i was thinking omg so true queen and then- FHSBFBDB 👉👈🩷🥺 i love you my crystal gem 🥺🩷🩵💎

MOMMYYYYY MY TWO BIGGEST COMFORTS (outside of you~) 🥺🥺🥺 they look so so cute my love 🥺😭🩷🩷 thank you so much 🥺🩷

tbh same :( i feel like i’m gonna be there for much longer unless that rate limit thing is indeed temporary… what sucks is especially for txt content and translations it was really good to have access to twt… i’m happy twitter hasn’t really been on my mind ever since i came here and met you my love 🥺🩷 our cute little community is very much loving and caring and i love being here, way more than there~ so if i had to leave i know i would stay here despite the lags hehe :3 🩷🩷

i love you so much as well mommy 🥺🥺🩷 you’re my queen~ my garden fairy 🥺🥺🩷 im always rooting for you too my love, thank you so much 🥺🥺🩷

PLEASE OMG LOOKING AT THEM SIDE BY SIDE THEY ARE SO CUTE OUR BLOGS ARE SO CUTE 🥹🥹🩷 this tyunning concept is really top tier and we sport it so well as tyuntwinz 🤭🩷

[cherrypeaking]

good morning my cherry bun~ 🥺🩵 i hope you slept well~

sooo funny thing happened with my personal trainer. you know how i said i could’ve sworn we were scheduled for 10:30 session on thursday? we were actually scheduled for 3:30 and i had no idea until she emailed me about it at 3:15….. a 3:30 appointment and i was several hours early lol 😭😭 i asked if she was willing to go through with our 3:30 session but she said she’d rather have a fresh start on monday, so we’re doing just that :> can’t wait to get back into the swing of things!!

i went to the grocery store with my mom to pick up stuff for pancake day tomorrow! :3 i bought some honey (for me since i loove honey on my pancakes) and i wanted to get strawberries but i guess they’re out of season now :( i’m thinking about using agave syrup on my pancakes since i have a lot left over from when i had girlfriend toast (that’s what i’m calling toast made the way you have it in the morning~ 🥺) oh and i found fudge covered oreos at the store today i can’t wait to try them!! (whenever i buy snacks for myself my dad looks at me in disgust like i’m gonna eat everything i bought in one sitting -_-)

we were able to find some beef bacon at the store and my dad was so jazzed about it that he decided we should have……. baked potatoes… with bacon bits for dinner 😐 yeah so needless to say i’m making my own dinner! it’s chicken salad since i’m craving something cold and summery :D

you know what else i’m craving? you. 🥺🥺 i’m craving your embrace and your voice and your hand so i can hold it among… other things 🤭 your voice warms me to my core i keep thinking about how hypnotizing your eyes are and how insanely beautiful you are… my sweet cherry princess 🥺 i’m so in love with you…

i was looking for tyunning photos to use for today’s moodboard and omfg.. please look at this pic bc i cannot stop laughing 😭😭

MY STOMACH HURTS WHY DOES KAI LOOK 10 FEET TALL TAEHYUN LOOKS LIIE HE’S 3 FEET TALL HERE HELPSKSJJS

i love you cherry bear 🥺🥺🩵 have a good day today~ <3

good morning my sweet crystal 🥺🥺🩷 i slept well thanks to you~ i’m at work at the moment so i’m taking the time to answer your ask 🥺🩷

waaaaah i’m so relieved you didn’t miss your appointment on accident that’s great :’) hehehe i’m glad you’ll be having a fresh start with her on monday then 🥺🩷 my mommy is gonna get so strong 🥹🩷🩷 i’d love to know what you work on when you meet her again~ she’s so lucky she gets to see my girlfriend working out ;////; 🩷🩷

girlfriend toast ;////; omg that made me smile so widely mommy 🥹🥹🩷🩷 aaaah i love you so much mommy ;////; 🩷🩷 agave syrup and honey on pancakes sounds so great!! i didn’t expect strawberries to be out of season so fast ;_; i thought they’d last all summer like all berries 🥺 i can’t wait to see your pancakes mommy!! 🥺🥺🩷

waaah hehe you told me a little about your dinner being weird and i have to say during summer having bacon and baked potatoes seems so heavy ;3; i’m glad you made chicken salad~ it’s okay if it’s not perfect because to me everything you make is perfect 🥹🥹🩷

my love 🥺🥺🥹😭🩷🩷 i’m always thinking about you too~ i’m craving you hehehe what you say makes me so happy and i’m also at a loss for words 😖🩷🩷 i can’t get you out of my head my sweet queen~ i love you so much 🥺 i’m in love with you too 👉👈🩷 everything about you is so beautiful 🥺🥹🩷🩷 i want you to always feel like the most beautiful person in the world because that’s who you are to me 🥺🥺���

OMGGSHDJSJFJD PLEASE THE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE REALLY HITS THERE 😭😭 the moodboard is so you and so us my love 🥹🥹 i love it~

i’ll be having a good day thanks to you always, my adorable girlfriend 🥹🩷😚 thank you so much 🥺🥺 i hope you sleep well yourself as you’ll probably be heading to sleep 🥺 i’m gonna miss you lots, but i also want my girlfriend to be fully rested and healthy >3< 🩷🩷 i’ll be seeing you soon!!~ 🥺🩷 i love you crystal 💎🩷🩵🥺

[farfrompleasant]

I've missed you as well!!! ♡

And YUPP the inside of her nose sheds too and sometimes I have to pull it out with tongs just so our freyby-pie can breathe 😀 and omg, no need to apologize you weren’t sure and that’s why I am here to confirm things for yous! it's no biggie! Also, I don’t find you to be annoying at all 

omg 🥺 Little Miss Nova finds solace behind you in this big big world... that is sooo precious and wholesome! I love that she’s gaining such a relationship/ bond with you... to know that someone is there to keep her safe is just so moving to me 🥹 and I think it’s interesting how intuitive our pets can be... they’re very compassionate beings, right? It sounds like Lizzie a deep understand to your previous situation and has taken it upon herself to protect you from being hurt 🥺 I don't think you should feel too guilty about it, it’s not like you’ve morphed her into being protective intentionally... for some dogs, I think it is an instinctual thing but I can understand why you may feel that way...

This reminds me of my mom’s dog; she’s small, but very feisty and protective like Lizzie-- Issa’s always been one to bark up a storm and attack people once she feels as though they’re a threat. And my mom doesn’t like how Issa acts, but she’s always been that way...

My brother’s dog the a tan, medium-small chihuahua mix... His name is Brodie and he’s turning nine on the thirtieth. We’ve had him since he was four c: And Issa is the tri-colored one... she’s also a chihuahua mix and she’s seven... we’ve had her since she was three months old c:

Abbie is an old gal ;o how old is Lizzie??? however old they are, they look absolutely healthy and happy-- you’re a great caretaker of your pets forsure and I loooove that for them 🥰 This is why you’re Freyja’s god mom c:

I wish I could house all thirty! but my family is barely warming up to our little sass queen. Now, I take her out when they're around and I have them interact with her... Freyja’s very curious and tends to be very attentive to speech so I’ll have them say hello to her and if they’re up for it... there will be dialogue!!

I just want to give her the life that she used to know with my partner... they would take her out to public places! like isn’t that cool?! The most I've taken her to is the grocery store

Lmfaoo now that, that is funny! Heller was all reclusive... I would think that of Wallace given that his name is Wallace lol  I really love the dynamics of your pets 🥺 it’s like you have a chaotic group of five! And they have very distinguishable personalities 🥰 And THANK YOU FOR LABELING THOSE FLUFF-BABIES! BECAUSE I DIDN’T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE TWO ALTHOUGH I KNOW YOU’VE TOLD ME!

Thank you! Maybe one day?... I mean, I could have Benadryl but to take that everyday is kinda crazy... but I tend to do that when I visit my partner’s mom, she has two beauties that I wish to pet all the time! But ugh, I have to love them from a distance!

You think she’s beefy!!? I feel like she’s so widdle! Maybe in person she appears to be super small, despite pancaking majority of the time lol but ah, that is super reassuring! Just from that, I feel as though I've made a healthy diet for her... she was actually smaller when she first moved in with me... but oh god, thank you thank you! I’m sure she’d appreciate that comment! ♡

Happy Freyja Friday!!!

So I remember reading that adult beardies shed only once or twice a year??? Poor Freyja she's so extra she's doing more than the other beardies 😭

Or maybe it's because she only does a part of body at a time? But since adult beardies shed due to wear and tear they don't need to do whole body like when they're growing right so that doesn't make a lot of sense either 🤔 what an enigma

Yeah, Everyone is over this heat wave 🥲 my ass has to go outside like five times a day to keep Nova from going potty in the house and I hate that for me lol

You're right monitors can be huge! I think because there's like a bunch of different species all in the monitor family, like isn't a komodo dragon also a monitor lizard???

Speaking of komodo dragons, sometimes I forget that reptiles are such an ancient species, it's so fascinating! Did you come across any cool bits in your research on monitors? Komodo dragons have venom in their saliva which is cool/gross/scary not necessarily in that order lol

Ya Lizzie is a drama queen because she's developed this thing over the years where she's possessive of me. Her vet actually straight up said she's resource-guarding me during a visit and asked me to step out 😭 (pre-pandemic times so it's been a thing with her for ages)

Can you cool Freyja down by giving her ice cubes in her water or bath? Freezing her treats? Is she okay in this dang heat!

So Heller and Wallace are not being the same about Nova in the house at all, Wallace will taunt Nova when she's in her crate minding her business, and Heller just cries for Wallace to not go downstairs because he's scared, just like when they first got home and weren't used to all the space and creatures in the space yet 🤷🏻‍♀️

She's pretty bad at catch

Omgg Happy Freyja Friday (x3) ?

I'm unsure, but I know that it's been a while huh 😅 I've thought of just sending you small blurbs of content just cause I missed sharing stuffs with you 🥺

Instead, I went cold turkey, especially since I haven't been taking many pictures of Miss Girl lol and if you must know, I've been a lot better since the last time we talked c:

Now, onto Freyja Friday! I'm sure you've had inquiries while I've been gone and I'm looking forward to hearing from my dear friend ❤️

Yeah... Freyja has to be a different breed because she sheds damn near every month-- she's shedding as we speak, actually. And my god, I'm sure eye shed is the most uncomfortable feeling along with nose shed and where she expels waste (idk what to really call it but I've been calling it her russy😭) I don't know... there will be multiple parts of her body simultaneously shedding, but yeah the process is not like that of a snake; there is no one full, swoop. I would love to know why is it that she sheds so much, but I'll have to settle to her being an enigma... a high maintenance one at that. Kidding! it's no biggie to me c: and to answer your question, she’s pretty lax in regards to these heat waves... I heard that beards (and maybe reptiles as a whole) cannot eat frozen foods or treats. I think by them being exoteric, they might not be able to digest cool/frozen goodies properly ://

BUT BUT! I have been taking her outside since my absence on here and👏🏾 let👏🏾 me👏🏾tell👏🏾you👏🏾 we have made some progress!! Miss Girl can be outside for five to ten minutes max as long as 

she’s handled (or cradled... she has scampered and clawed her way onto my torso!)

the sun is out or setting... she somewhat likes being out, despite the slight breeze

and as long as we avoid areas with large trees, she gets a tad wary once there’s shade and shaking leaves in the equation

but yeah... she’s learning to be okay with the outside world... one evening at a time c;

NOVAAAAAA! How is the baby-dog?! Is she potty trained by now or is it still just a concept for her? lolol I definitely feel your pain! My brother's dog is an old coot that isn't potty trained so uh... we mop at least twice a day... he's a menace! But I'm glad that you are able to take Nova out to potty!! I'm sure she's getting well acquainted with the living situation and appreciates you doing so too ❤️ I know I sure as heck would... it's way better than feeling guilty 🫣

THAT IS SO COOL, in that order too lol... I guess they have more in common with monitors than I thought c: Well now you reminded me that Komodo dragons are considered to be a type of monitor lizard c: and a few fun fact about monitors is that they have high intelligence, they don't blink but have great vision, and compared to majority of their species they tend to seek out human interaction and affection. Isn't that neat?! I thought it was... made me want to get one of each 🤩

Oh wow o_o sounds like Miss Lizzie is playing reverse momma bear! She said: ain’t no body attacking my human, periodt 😂 I find it to be very endearing as it really implicates that she cherishes you to the point of being protective and possessive 🥹 and I love her for that, even though it is not so much a good trait (human-wise).

No offense, at all really but LMFAOOOO not Heller being a literal scaredy cat! And my boy Wallace is out here being thee instigator/antagonizer!! Omg I love cats and their antics!! I’m so bummed that I'm super allergic because I want a black one, a girl too... I'd name her onyx 🥺 ANyways before I start longing for those creatures of death-- it sounds like it’s been a bit of a wild ride for you, as an onlooker, and Little Miss Nova but ugh that made my day!

I hope to surprise and or entertain you with the latest update! it’s really nice to be back c: here’s a handful of gifs I made with you in mind, friend! ♡

🥰✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*🥺Isn’t she lovely?🥺✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*🥰

[cherrypeaking]

i’m so glad you slept well my love!! waaah i can’t wait to know what you’ve got to eat for the event 🥹 i hope you have fun!! 🥺🥺🩷 i’ll be enjoying myself for sure 🥺🥺 as long as we are together >\\\<

omg my beautiful queen <3 thank you for saying that but for me you are the most amazing one hehe my pretty woman 🥺

aaaah it’s so crazy that we were both thinking the other wouldn’t like us ;////; yet i was convinced i’d get rejected… i’m so happy it’s not the case my love i love you so so much 🥺🥺🩷

thank you so much mommy i’m so glad you like it!! aaah so they’re called mochi donuts >3< they seem so good hehe 🤭🩷🩷 i’d love to share some with you 🥺🥺

i feel the exact same 🥹 what matters to me the most is that you’re happy and when it comes to writing your opinion always matters the most to me >\\\\< as long as you like it i’ll be okay 🥺🥺🩷 definitely take it day by day~ and i’ll be here whenever you wanna show me something 🥺😚🩷

YOU SOUNDED SO GOOD MY LOVE 😭😭🩷🩷 the song is definitely a little high ;///; but you slayyyyyed 🥹🥹🩷 as expected of my dear precious crystal gem 🥺💎🩷

i love you too my wifey 😚🩷💎

my precious fairy of crystals 🥺🥺🩷💎

i hope you’re sleeping well, i’m having fun playing games while patiently waiting for you to wake up 😚🩷 i didn’t do much as i’m still very weak from my period so i’ll just be lazy all day this weekend 🤭🩷

not a lot to talk about except for the fact that i love you to the moon and back 🥹🩷 every day i feel so thankful and grateful that you’re in my life… i never thought i’d meet someone like you with whom i can get along so well and who’s so beautiful inside and out 🥺🥺

i always remember how i felt, trying to be more and more romantic in my asks but terrified that you’d reject me 😖 and here you were feeling the same that feels unbelievable 😳😭 god i love you so much my precious crystal mommy 🥺🥺😚🩷💎

these little donuts are so cute?? when i saw them i wondered how to make them and what they’d taste like :0 have you had donuts like these?? 🥺🩷

i also wanted to tell you not to feel bad about not being able to write often mommy 🥺🥺 your writing is so so great and my favorite as always 🥺🥺🩷 no matter when, i’ll always be happy to talk about your ideas and to read your fics when they’re posted or even before 🥺😚🩷 your happiness is what matters the most to me and as long as you’re happy i am happy too 🥺🥺🩷 i can always try to help my love, i want to 🥺🫶🩷 and like i’ve said, my writing/reading has hit a slump too >\\\< i just always wanna be with you and talk to you mommy~

i love you so much i wish i could hug you so bad my love 🥺🥺 hearing your singing voice made me so so happy and full (not like that- unless…)~ you’re my precious crystal wifey 😚😚💎🩷 i’ll see you soon!! 🥺🩷🩷

my sweet little cherry fairy 🥺🥺🩵🩵

i slept so well bc i thought of you before going to bed 🥺🥺 you deserve to have a lazy weekend i hope you enjoy yourself 🥺🩵 i’m going out to a bts 10th anniversary event with my bff today and the place we’re going to has such an interesting menu i wanna order some items just so i can try them and report back to you hehe

my baby :((( i’m gonna cry you’re the one who’s beautiful both inside and out 🥺 you have such a beautiful soul and i’m so so thankful for you 🥺🩵 my woman~

omg i’m laughing bc the moment i realized i liked you i was so scared of you knowing in fear of scaring you away and then i proceeded to write the worlds longest ask response talking about how thankful i was for you and how i was so glad we met and the whole time i was writing it i was like “okay don’t make it TOO lovey dovey” but my first priority was making sure you knew how much i cared about you 🥺🥺🩵

aaa this moodboard is so pretty lovey 🥺🥺🥺🩵 i love mochi donuts!! they’re so chewy and soft and sweet (they kinda remind me of you 🤭🩵) i’ve never made them before but they’re so delicious especially when made fresh �� i wanna share some with you~ 🥺🩵

my sweetheart 🥺🥺🥺 thank you so much i take so much comfort in being your favorite considering that you’re my favorite 🥺🩵🩵 i love talking through ideas and fic wips with you my love 🥺 your help means a lot to me and your happiness matters the most to me 🥺🥺🥺 it’s hard to write when all i wanna do is talk to and think about my cherry bear >///< i’ve been working little by little though, just taking it day by day~

my baby 🥺🥺🩵 i’m so glad you like my singing i was worried about singing fairy of shampoo bc it’s a little out of my range and i started to feel bad bc damn tubatu can sing this but i can’t?? 😭 but i still think it ended up sounding good especially since you liked it! 🥺🩵🩵 (makes you feel full, huh? 😳😳 does mommy make you feel full baby?)

hehe my pretty cherry wifey~ 🥺🥺🩵 i love you, talk soon~