#mw2 x reader angst
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prettyoatmeal · 2 years ago
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can i request konig angst and fluff fic plss like an argument etc i love your work so much 🫶🏽🫶🏽
Apology Accepted
1 order of Angst coming right up!
Genre: Hurt/Comfort
Summary: Everything had gone wrong today, all you wanted to do was forget about what had happened and move past it, the very very very last thing you needed was König having a go at you. But when he finds you having a few drinks after you've missed his calls and messages, he isn't happy.
Warnings: Arguing (sorry, I'm not good at writing conflict), angst, slight mentions of alcohol addiction.
Word Count: 1856
Masterlist here!
***************
It seemed nothing had wanted to go right today.
Waking up was a disaster. You had accidentally set an alarm for 6 pm rather than 6 am. Curse 12-hour time. Waking up late with such little time to get ready and leave, you couldn't have your usual morning sit down with König. Or really talk to him all that much really. A simple ‘Goodbye’ and a kiss had been exchanged between you two before you had to leave to make it in time for the train. It was understandable, you were in a rush.
When walking to the train station, it had suddenly begun raining, causing you to have to run to the station with your work clothes to get soaked.
Even though you left the house late, you found yourself arriving to the station couple minutes earlier than you normally would have, so you took that extra time to fix yourself in the bathrooms. Unfortunately you had misread the time and took too long in the bathroom, missing the train to the city, ultimately making you an hour late to your job. Your boss was understanding, though it didn’t mean you were completely off the hook. You agreed to stay an extra hour in the office in compensation for your tardiness.
That was until you realised you were in such a rush in the morning that you had completely forgotten the paperwork you were required to bring back that day. Maybe it was for the best, it would’ve gotten soaked. You’re lucky you kept your work laptop in your desk the day before otherwise that also would have gotten soaked. So you’d stayed back even longer to make up for the lost paperwork, working yourself half to death out of guilt, promising to bring it in tomorrow and take an umbrella with you next time. 
The stress of the day was taking a toll on you by the time you had been taking the train back. You were so awfully tired, practically half asleep on the ride back, completely ready to call it a night the moment you get home. You were so out of it by the time, you hadn’t noticed your phone buzzing in your pocket.
Unlocking the front door and walking in, you were greeted to the warm lights of the kitchen shining in your eyes. 
“I’m home!” you called out, kicking your shoes off before closing the door once more. Walking to the kitchen, you washed your hands before immediately pouring yourself a shot of Scotch straight from your liquor cabinet. Feeling yourself getting restless, you pinched your nose before letting all the liquid run down your throat at once, coughing at the burn in your throat. You poured another glass and filling the rest with coke. Letting out a sigh, you took a sip and leaned back against the counter, letting your muscles relax. Small sips turned to swigs, swigs turned to drinking the glass in a single go again, earning another cough from the fizziness and burn. This only resulted in you pouring yourself a third glass. You didn’t want to think about today. Today was filled with nothing but humiliation and disappointment. But the disappointment wouldn’t end there.
Hearing his heavy footsteps approaching, you look up at him with half lidded eyes, feeling a little hazy from your sleepiness. 
“Schatz! You’re home so late. You haven’t responded to my messages.”
He was fresh out of the shower, his hair damp from what looked like a quick attempt at drying it with a towel. His voice was filled with concern, worry. You quickly took your phone out only to see missed calls and unread texts from Köing.
19:20
Missed Call
Missed Call
‘Hey, you missed my calls. Where are you? You don’t normally stay out this late.’
‘Hello hello?’
‘You there?’
‘I hope you’re safe. Please call me back. Love you.’
20:12
‘I’m getting worried. Please reply.’
‘Hello’
‘Hello’
Missed Call
‘:(’
‘I hope everything is okay, hope you get home safe. Love you.’
The guilt had begun to set in again, frowning at the phone you’re holding in front of you. How could you have not noticed your phone buzzing so much? It’s not like it was on silent either. Maybe the buzzing was lost to the loud noises on the train.
“I’m sorry, I mustn’t have noticed.”
“So you come home and immediately start drinking?” Your stomach dropped. “Where were you? It’s almost 8:30, you finish at 5.”
König had always been protective over you, especially in a world like today. He hated it when you wouldn’t respond to his messages or calls, it would always make him extremely anxious. What you’re doing, who you’re with, what if you’re in trouble and he wasn’t there to help you. With a heavy shame flowing over you as you take a look at your glass, you placed it down after swallowing your last sip and slid it across the bench out of your reach.
“I got to work late and forgot some important files, so I stayed back.” 
“So you couldn’t have called me to tell me you won’t be home on time? That you’ll be hours late and I’ll be stuck worrying about where you are. You couldn’t just send me back a text saying when you got off the train? For heaven’s sake, you’re walking home. Walking home alone in the dark, anything could happen.”
You looked down with a frown. You’d left in the morning with barely any words said and hadn’t heard anything else from you until you’d arrived hours later than you normally would, he had every reason to be upset.
“Honestly, I expected better from you, (Y/N).”
But not to scold you like if you were an incompetent teen.
“Excuse me? I am fully capable of protecting myself. Quit trying to treat me like a child!” You snapped back, looking back up at him, only to see disappointment in his eyes. Disappointment. You’d already gotten soaking wet in the morning, missed your train, was late to work, and had to stay back for hours after. You didn’t need to take this. It wasn’t very often you’d see that look from him, and definitely not directed at you. It only made your stomach drop more.
“I’m not, but you know how worrying it is when you don’t communicate these things with me.” He groaned, “just... go upstairs and take a shower. You smell of alcohol and rainwater. I don’t want to start arguing with you about this.”
And so you did just that, chucking your keys down to the kitchen counter and making your way upstairs. It was probably for the best, the stress from today had finally caught up to you causing tears to well up in the corners of your eyes as you made your way upstairs. König didn’t follow you, but you couldn’t care less at that point, you didn’t want to see him right now, you needed that space. Finally stripping yourself from your terribly uncomfortable clothing in front of the bathroom mirror, you finally felt a small sense of relief.
After brushing away the alcohol from your teeth and dressing yourself in something warm and comfortable, you had finally collapsed into your shared bed. After holding it in for so long, tears couldn’t help but fall from your eyes as a tsunami of emotions washed over you. Everything from today that could have gone wrong went wrong, you thought you could’ve at least relaxed at home, but you couldn’t. All you could do was think back over the day, the goddamn Scotch hadn’t done its thing. Not to mention how König looked down on you, those dark eyes he’d only ever really use on the battlefield. Looking down on you like one would with a child. The alcohol wasn’t helping either. You felt upset with yourself, you felt shame, you felt humiliation. You couldn’t help but sob into your pillow, holding it to your face as tightly as you can to muffle the sounds you were making. It wasn’t even 5 minutes before you felt yourself drifting off to sleep, ready to put this day behind you.
You slowly awaken to the sound of porcelain being placed on top of the wooden bedside table with a small clang of metal, as well as a particularly nice smell. Something warm and homey. You feel a dip in the mattress as König sits down next to you. Opening your eyes, you pry your face away from the pillow and you glance over to the table. Goulash. It’d smelt wonderful, but you couldn’t bring yourself to eat.
“Schatz,” he whispered out, “warmed up dinner for you.”
His voice was soothing, calming. Nothing like how it sounded before. You’d glanced up at him a few times before finally shaking your head ‘no’ in response. You weren’t hungry, quite the opposite of it. It felt as if you were to put anything in your mouth, food or not, you’d throw up. You knew he could tell you’d been crying, your cheeks still warm and streaky, your eyes still puffy and red. Each glance you took at him with your glassy eyes shattered his heart a bit more. König’s figure blurred in front of you, whether it been from your drunken state or the dried-up tears in your eyes from earlier, you weren’t sure.
“I’m sorry.” He muttered out sincerely as one of his rough, calloused hands made its way up to your tear-stained cheek. His hands were large against your face, caressing the plush skin of your cheeks. They may have been rough, but they were also gentle, soothing, calming. Your blinking became slower as you leaned into his warm palms.
“I’m sorry I made you feel like I was disappointed in you. I was just so worried… today was rough for you, I should have been more… kind when choosing what to say.”
His words brought tears to your eyes once more. You didn’t want to talk about this. Not right now at least. You may not have wanted to, but you knew you needed to. Confrontation was always a heavy topic, didn’t matter who was in the wrong. His calm expression turned to concern once more as he noticed how your eyes welled up from his apology. You leaned into his hand more, as if you were trying to cover your flushed face with it, his palm catching the stream of your tears.
Apology accepted.
Sitting up finally, you wrapped your arms around him as tightly as you could manage with König doing the same. It felt like home. You hadn’t realised how homesick you’ve felt until he’d pulled you into him so tightly. He felt like home. You felt yourself melting into his chest as you let out a long sigh you didn’t know you were holding in.
“I’m glad you’re home safe, I’m sorry I hadn’t said that earlier, Liebling.”
All you could respond with was a small whimper.
“I know, I know, ” he whispered back, placing a small kiss on top of your head, “I love you, Mous. I need to work on showing that more often.”
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I'm sorry, this isn't proof read 😭😭 please dont mind any gramatical errors or just bad story building in general
Goodnight <3
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criminalamnesia · 10 months ago
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Simon x Reader whose already work with TF 141 for a pretty long time. And one day, there's a traitor around the base, leaking their information. All of the proof are leading to reader but reader always deny it! And they interrogated reader, and reader always deny it! And he's (with other 141 members, of course, but it mostly him) do their torture methods to get information out of reader. They keep doing it until someday, the real traitor finally captured!
And make the reader traumatized, pls. Like, she would have trust issues, trauma, and others. She wouldn't forgive them, tho.
ooooo the angst. had to sit on this one for a few days before I wrote something, but here goes nothing.
ALL PARTS CAN BE FOUND HERE
when you blink open your eyes, the room is dimly lit. it’s silent save for the sounds of your labored breathing.
you must’ve passed out. one second johnny— a man you’d known for years—was slicing into your skin with a knife. the next, you’re staring into an empty room.
your hands jerk up involuntarily. still bound. the rope holding them to the arms of the chair have rubbed them raw. the skin is bright red and bloody. it makes you grit your teeth.
you look down at your lap, taking inventory of the parts of your body you can see. large gashes break up the fabric of your tac pants. the blood surrounding the deep wounds is dry and crusty.
one of the cuts looks like it’s getting infected. you swear you can see bone.
you’d taken this kind of suffering before. been capture by enemies, held and tortured and pushed to the brink of death. this was different. this was being done by your team. men you’d bled with. cried with. laughed with.
one you’d even slept with. the same one you loved. the one you called yours.
the door to the room swung open, hitting the wall with a metal thud. your head slowly lifts, eyes squinting to see him. by his stature, you know it’s simon.
he doesn’t bother shutting the door behind him. instead, he walks towards you slowly. as he comes closer, can make out his eyes in the sea of dark paint he smears around them. the same paint you’d helped him apply a time or two.
“back for more?” you say, and it’s meant to sound sarcastic, but all it sounds like is pitiful. your voice cracks, and pain seeps into your tone.
the first rule they’d taught you about scenarios like this was to never let the enemy know it’s working. never let them know that they’re hurting you— that they’re slowly wearing down your defenses.
well, you’d just broken that rule, and you hadn’t even meant to.
you didn’t know how long you’d been tied up, subjected to torture by men you had once called your family. all because a fucking liar whispered your name into their ears. all because they fucking believed it.
apparently the years meant nothing to them. to him, least of all, considering he’d done more damage to you than the rest of them.
simon comes to a stop in front of you. his hands are empty by his sides, but that’s not reassuring. there’s a table full of weapons off to the side. he would have his pick of the litter.
“ready to talk yet?” he says, and his voice is gruff. his tone is hollow. he’s speaking to you the same way he’d spoken to countless enemies. it makes you sick.
“fuck you, simon,” you spit out.
the betrayal of john, gaz, and johnny had hurt. but simon’s betrayal? that was enough to almost put you in the ground.
you’d stopped pleading with them the second they tied you to the chair. now, you were angry. furious. rage filled your veins, and if you weren’t beaten to all hell, you’d find a way out of these fucking restraints and strangle the man in front of you to death.
the man you loved. you’d thought you meant something to him, but apparently not— because who tortures someone they love?
“if you talk,” he ignores your outburst. “it’ll be easier. quick.”
“fuck. you.” you enunciate the words, your jaw impossibly tight as you grit your teeth. “im not the fucking rat.”
“all the evidence,” he starts as he disappears from your vision. you know he’s going to pick his weapon of the hour. you force yourself not to shudder.
“points to you.”
“take that bullshit evidence and shove it up your ass, riley,” you seethe, ropes pulling taut as you lean forward in the chair.
he’s back in your line of sight now, brandishing a large knife.
“you’re only making it harder on yourself, love,” he tuts, and then he’s swinging the knife down, right onto one of your fingers.
you scream as the blade cuts right through skin and bone. your teeth dig into your lip, drawing blood as you refuse to give him more of a reaction. it fucking hurts, but you’ll be damned if you let yourself cry.
“feel like talking now?” he asks, watching as half of your left pinky finger falls to the floor.
“or should we take off another?”
you look up at him, hoping he can see the hatred in your eyes as you speak your next words. “you could take the fucking hand off and I’d still have nothing to tell you.”
“let’s see how true that is then, eh?” he replies, and raises the knife again. he’s about to swing, when someone comes running into the room.
“ghost!”
it’s johnny. he’s obviously winded as he stops beside simon, dropping his hands to his knees as he struggles for breath.
“what, mactavish? im busy.”
“they’re—” he gasps. “they’re not— the— rat.” he says between breaths.
the room goes impossibly still. so quiet you swear you could hear the men’s heartbeats (or maybe that pounding in your ears was your own).
“you sure?” simon’s voice is softer as he lowers the knife and turns to johnny. the younger man nods, his eyes trained on you. you can see the regret in them, the sorrow.
“it’s fucking shepard.”
it’s not funny, but at the news, you burst into laughter. the men stare at you in confusion, but you can’t stop.
you’re laughing so hard you’re crying, and they’re just standing there.
“are you alrigh’?” johnny’s asking as he moves towards you. he’s fully recovered his breath now, and he drops to a crouch to be eye level with you.
you don’t answer— you can’t. you keep laughing. distantly, you hear the knife simon was holding clatter to the ground. can just make out the sound of more footsteps out in the hallway, coming towards the room.
you pass out.
when you wake up again, you’re in the infirmary. your eyes open slowly, adjusting to the bright fluorescent lights.
“easy, love,” a voice to your right drawls.
your eyes are fully open now. you look down at yourself, noticing the lack of bindings. noticing the iv taped to your arm, the stitched cuts, the black and blue bruises, the missing fingernails and missing finger.
the person sitting next to you clears his throat. that’s when you look up and meet the eyes of your captain.
your captain. the man who was supposed to lead you, to keep you safe. what a fucking joke. he’d started the damn witch hunt.
“how d’you feel?” he asks, his words soft, like he’s trying not to scare off a timid animal.
you stare at him for a beat. then two. then you’re moving, pulling the iv from your arm and shakily pushing yourself up in the bed. price is telling you to stop, reaching out to push you back down, but you slap at his hands.
“get the fuck off me!” you shout, and that takes him aback. he stops, frozen, as he watches you shift in the bed. you throw your legs over the side of it and prepare yourself to stand.
“you really shouldn’t—” he begins after he’s regained his senses, but you pay him no mind. you place your feet on the ground and start to stand. your legs wobble, almost give out, but you’re able to stand. barely.
“shut up,” you growl, stumbling forward and towards the exit. he’s moving to cut you off, and you slide him a gaze that’s sharper than a knife. “and leave me the fuck alone.”
he halts again. he seems almost scared of you— but that can’t be right. even on your best days, he would still beat you in hand-to-hand combat.
he’s not scared of your threats or your frail body. he’s scared of what he’s done to you.
just then, johnny and gaz come through the infirmary doors.
“cap, y’alright? we heard yellin’—” johnny begins, but his mouth snaps shut at the sight of you out of bed.
you’re heaving from your spot next to the bed. your legs are shaking violently, threatening to give out any second. you feel nauseous and numb.
“let’s get you back into bed,” gaz says, and he starts towards you, but you stop him as your gaze snaps to his.
“don’t come any fucking closer. any of you.”
“bonnie,” johnny murmurs. he sounds miserable, but you don’t care. don’t give a fuck about how any of them feel.
“don’t. im leaving,” you grunt out, moving a foot forward slowly. you’d be damned if you fell in front of them.
“you can’t, love. you’re in no shape to be walking.” john says, and you snarl.
“and whose fault is that?”
the men stay silent as they watch you slowly shuffle towards the foot of the bed. you’re bracing yourself to walk on your own when simon walks in.
“get back in bed,” his tone is blunt. you ignore him.
you remove your hand from the bed, move to take a step forward without support, and you begin to crumple to the floor.
simon moves forward, quick as a cat, and catches you. he lifts you into his arms bridal style, and you’re screaming hysterically. your limbs are flailing the best they can in such a battered state. you’re in fight-or-flight mode, your body betraying your desire to put up a steely front.
your palms slap against simon’s upper body and his masked face. he gives no reaction. he doesn’t say anything. the others are watching the exchange silently. the room is buzzing with tension.
“get off me!” you screech, landing a slap to simon’s cheek. “let me— let me go! let me go!” you’re gasping for breath, tears streaming down your cheeks. you’re panicking. your heart feels like it’s going to beat out of your chest.
“put me down! get— get— off me! stop—” you sob.
the doctor rushes into the room then, yelling at the men for allowing you out of bed. you can’t make out what she’s saying over the rush of blood in your ears. you feel light-headed. you can’t breathe.
“put them down, now!” the doctor yells at simon. “they’re having a panic attack— I thought I told you four to stay away from them? they’re too vulnerable right now—” the doctor is chastising them as simon places you back in the bed.
spots are dancing in your vision. you don’t even feel it when the doctor sticks another needle into your arm. the words being exchanged above your head are muffled. it’s like you’re underwater.
john’s face comes into view, then johnny’s, then gaz’s. as your eyes start to close, you notice the only face you don’t see again is simon’s.
when you wake up again, it’s been two weeks.
the doctor had put you into a medically induced coma to allow your more serious wounds time to heal, without risking another episode. unbeknownst to you, the members of your team had stayed by your bedside almost the entire time— minus simon. he hadn’t come within ten feet of the infirmary since the day of your panic attack.
there’s fresh flowers on the bedside table. a steady beeping of the heart monitor. a fuzzy feeling in your head.
it feels like a dream, all of it does. none of it feels real as you settle into your body again. but then the hurt starts, and you remember the truth.
your family betrayed you. your lover betrayed you. they locked you up and tortured you. they didn’t believe you.
when the doctor came to your side to check your iv, she smiled.
“how’re you feeling?”
you look up at her, and it takes a moment for you to speak.
“don’t,” you begin. your mouth feels like it’s full of cotton. “don’t let them…in here. don’t…wanna see them.”
the doctor nods in understanding, and she doesn’t say anything else to you. she turns and walks out of the room.
the door clicks shut behind her. she lets out a sigh before turning around to face the three men.
“they don’t want to see you.” she tells them, and their expressions drop. they don’t protest, and like wounded puppies, they walk off.
no one else comes to check on you for a few hours.
you’re in and out of consciousness— can’t tell what’s real and what’s a dream. flashes of your torture come back to you. flashes of a smile. of a scarred face. of hands on your hips and—
you crack your eyes open, and the room is dark. the only light is the blinking of some of the machines. it illuminates the room enough to allow you to see a large, dark figure slip from the room. the door clicks shut so quietly it’s almost imperceptible.
that’s when you notice fresh flowers on the bedside table.
your eyes start to droop once more, and you chalk up whatever you just saw to a dream, while simon exhales heavily on the other side of the infirmary door.
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authors note:
I hope this alright! it’s one in the morning (and I’m half asleep writing this) so I apologize for the errors that are most likely present, and the sense this most likely lacks. I feel like I could write a whole book about this idea, but im cutting myself off to sleep lol.
thank you for the ask, I hope I did your idea justice. 🫶
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shamelesswolftheorist · 2 months ago
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Simon Riley wasn't new to the feeling of getting hurt. He had witnessed so much already, had been hurt way worse before, and still this little bruise on his cheek hurt so much more than everything he's ever experienced.
Because the one to give him that bruise was you. His sweet little angel hit him in the face. Worse than that, you did not recognize him. You did not recognize the man you loved. Too caught up in the nightmares that haunted you only seconds prior, vision too foggy to see him and not the monsters that hurt you.
But Simon Riley was not a monster, not to you at least. He would never dream about hurting you. Never. Not even in his worst nightmares.
For a moment he thought that this was a nightmare too. His mind making him dream of you hating him. Seeing him as the monster he became on the battlefield. Fearing him.
It took a moment for him to realize that this was in fact real. That he was kneeling before you on the bed, his cheek bruising. And like it was instinct he suddenly knew what to do.
He approached you slowly, form hunched as to not appear like a predator, until he was close enough to wrap you in his arms and bring your shaking form into his lap. Holding you close, ear right above his heart.
You fought back. Scratching at his exposed chest, kicking your legs and even biting him. But he would not let go. No matter how much it hurt him.
He whispered sweet nothings into your ear. Promised you that it was him. That he would never hurt you, that he would always protect you. That he was there for you.
After awhile of soft praises and promises, your fighting stilled, your body slowly getting limp. Breathing ragged and hot tears streaming down your face, you started to cling onto him while whimpering his name over and over again. Apologizing for hurting him. For not recognizing him.
Simon Riley let you talk until you were too exhausted to keep your eyes open. That's when he began lulling you to sleep. Shushing you by humming a song that his mother once sung to him when he was just a little boy.
And only when you were back asleep in his arms, nightmare less, did Simon Riley let his own tears escape. Because seeing you like this broke him more than you could ever know. Because seeing you like this reminded him of himself.
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v1x3n · 3 months ago
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joonieskinks · 3 months ago
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Simon Riley who truly believes he’s never been happier than with you.
You met through a mutual friend on a night out, and spent the entire time getting to know one another. It was when you asked him out for the next night did he quite literally think about going to buy a ring already.
Simon Riley who never thought he would be the commitment or marriage type. Particularly because of his choice in career, they don’t go hand-in-hand. But for you, he’d do whatever he had to in order to keep you.
Four months later, he was having a talk with Price about time away to plan his wedding because you had said yes.
One year later and he was asking about a formal leave to be there for his pregnant wife and soon-to-be family.
Simon Riley who takes his vows so seriously. That ring on his finger keeps him grounded and is one of the only things that still gives him hope in this life.
He’s the best husband and will do anything for the love of his life. He’s just thankful he got to meet you and has the privilege of being yours.
Simon Riley who doesn’t recover when he finds out you passed unexpectedly while he was away.
He had never considered this could be his life. Never could have even fathomed. A married man still in his prime- now a widower, childless and utterly alone.
Simon Riley who throws himself into his work, who can’t bear a single moment to think about you, his family, the perfect life that could have been.
Blames himself for not being there to love and help you. Puts himself in the line of fire too many times to count. Some of his men thought it was heroic, but for those who really knew him, they knew what he really meant to do.
Simon Riley who still wears his ring, but can’t bring himself to look at it or even touch it. It’s empty and meaningless without you, but he can’t quite seem to get rid of it.
He thought despite all the bad in his life, he had finally found the one good thing to call his own.
Briefly, he did.
But not forever and always.
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empresskylo · 4 months ago
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ghost sitting so languidly during an intense meeting right before a mission, his eyes heavy and glaring right at you. you shift uncomfortably under his watch, swallowing hard knowing he's done nothing but stare at you the entire time. you feel his eyes burning through you as you speak, trying hard not to let your voice waver. you wonder if he’s even paying attention to what price is saying. your heartbeat is absolutely racing in your chest, not sure if his appraisal is lustful, vengeful, or something else entirely. so when price breaks the team off into pairs, you almost pass out when he buddies you with ghost. the second that left price’s mouth, ghost is shifting in his seat, sitting forward and leaning against his knees, a sly grin on under his mask. you have no idea what you’re in for.
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bi-writes · 3 months ago
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can we have like a pov of like what MOB would do if something did happen to simon..? luv you!
mail-order bride
your tea is cold when you pick it up to drink it. it burns you, how cold it is, and you cough a little as you set it down, grimacing as you wipe your lips.
maybe it's just one of those days. the rain is hitting a little too hard against the window. the cats have been restless. the dark one shredded your yoga mat by clawing at it under a doorway, and the orange tabby managed to knock over all of simon's plants from the windowsill (which you frantically put back inside their little pots--would plant murder be his last straw?). you left a red shirt in when you washed the whites (you apologized to all of simon's white tees), and when you noticed holes in your favorite sweats in a pattern that matched a cat's claws, you called it a day and decided to make tea (another fail).
you rub your pounding head, taking a deep breath, but you aren't given long to count down from five when your phone begins to ring.
you pick it up, not recognizing the number, but you put it to your ear as you get up to boil more water.
"hello?"
a throat clears on the other end. "do i have mrs. riley 'ere?"
you frown, leaning your hip against the kitchen counter as you turn a burner on and put the kettle over it.
"uhm...yeah. this is she," you say finally. you look at the clock; it's late, much too late. "who is this?"
"this is john. ah...captain john price, ma'am."
you clench your jaw, closing your eyes. "um...i'm sorry, i...what can i do for you? simon's not--"
"we had to call for medevac," john says lowly. "ahh...should be headin' into surgery soon. i--"
"wait--what?" you cough a little, shutting the stove off, and you're scrambling as you make your way to the bedroom. he's talking again, you realize, but you can't hear what he's saying. your eyes are moving around the room, and you frantically start to pull drawers open, grabbing a sweater, jeans, actual clothes to put on. you shed your pajamas, hopping as you slide your jeans on, and he's still talking, but you still hear nothing.
you run into the dresser, the furniture rattling, and you let the phone go, realizing you can't see because there's tears blurring your vision. you wipe them away, looking around for your purse, and when you realize what this is, an emergency--right?--you head for the bookcase in simon's study.
you toss a few books down onto the floor, your hands shaking as your fingers curl around the spine of a leather bible. you set the book down on simon's desk, flipping through the pages before you find your prized paper nestled between the pages of the book of john.
you head back to the bedroom, picking up the phone again, and you shakily dial the number that's on the back of the card. you take a seat on the bed (because where would you go anyways?), and you close your eyes as you wait for someone to pick up.
it rings for too long. you gasp a little, clutching the phone tight, and you beg for someone to pick up, please, please, please--
"'ello?"
"johnny--" you hiccup, standing up. "johnny, he...he told me--"
"wha--who--" on the other end, johnny shouts at someone to get a move on, "--bleedin' christ, who is this?"
"it's me," you whisper. "i'm...simon's--"
"ach...fuckin' hell..." there's a long, deep sigh on the other end. "oi, lass, listen, he's alright--"
"he's...b-but someone said surgery."
"right, i..." he sighs again, and you hear a door shut on the other end. "ye sit tight, luv. i'll come get ye, okay?"
you sniffle, wiping your face, "just tell me he's gonna be okay. tell me i'm worrying for nothing."
johnny chuckles a bit, and the sound soothes you just enough. "gonna be alright. lad's fuckin' dramatic, i'll tell ye tha', big brick fuckin' stepped in front of--"
"okay, johnny, please don't tell me how simon almost killed himself and get your ass over here, okay?" you snap, and johnny halts his laughing.
"right, yeah, forgive me." you hear the rattle of keys. "'m coming."
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"mrs. riley?"
your head lifts up. you blink the sleep out of your eyes, rubbing them gently, and there's a petite woman in scrubs smiling at you with her mask hanging around her neck. you have two sergeants at either side of you, captain price settled leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest. you have a blanket around your shoulders, and when you slip it off, johnny takes it from you gently.
"you can see him now."
you get to your feet, and when you pass simon's captain, he tips his hat at you respectfully. you hurry and follow the doctor down the hall, and when you see simon's name scribbled on a makeshift sigh on the wall, you eagerly pick up the pace until the door is opened for you.
he looks peaceful laying there. the monitors beep quietly around him, little wires and tubes falling around him, and you let out a breath when you see him blink those dark eyes awake blearily.
"tha' an angel?"
you start to cry. "you're such an asshole."
you come close to the side of the bed, taking his outstretched hand, and you clutch his big hand to your chest. you curl his hand into a fist, pressing your face against the back of his hand, kissing his knuckles there gently. he uncurls his fingers and wipes at your tears gently, shaking his head.
"gave ya a right scare, didn't i?"
"yes, you dickhead," you sniffle, and simon chuckles lowly, wincing a little as he clutches his lower stomach. you use your foot to bring the chair behind you closer, taking a seat in it as you look up at him. he turns his head to face you, giving you a pained smile, and you let out the breath you've been holding since johnny came to get you. "what's the matter with you, simon?"
"shit happens."
you try not to roll your eyes, but the anger is not lost on simon. he squeezes your hand gently, his eyes flicking up to the clock, and he grimaces when he realizes it's nearly six in the morning. you must have been here all night, waiting for him.
"is this how it's gonna be?" you ask in a whisper. when he meets your eyes again, it's more difficult this time. what you're asking isn't predictable. it isn't a straight answer. and if he gives you anything that isn't the truth, it feels like a lie, and he can't do that to you. "w-waking up in the middle of the night? hoping that the call isn't...that...hoping that--"
"not that simple," simon interrupts gently.
"well, make it simple, simon," you say firmly. even through your tears, your voice doesn't shake this time. "make it very simple for me, then."
simon purses his lips, and for the first time since you've met your husband, he hesitates. he doesn't have an answer, at least a good one.
"don't wanna lie to ya, swee'eart," simon murmurs, and you stare right back at him.
"then don't."
he sucks on his teeth, looking away, and you tug on his hand, pulling his eyes back to you.
"look at me, simon," you say, and he looks sad. he's going to tell you something that you won't want to hear. he's going to tell you something that's been the truth since he enlisted, a reality that never bothered him until he realized he had a responsibility to keep a roof over your head. there's someone waiting inside of his house. there's a place that's waiting for him on one side of the bed he shares with you. there's someone else's shoes always next to his, and someone else's name that will always be beside his own.
family.
he has a family.
"i'll try and keep ya outta here," is all simon murmurs. you smile at that. it's a promise, but he won't lie to you. always honest, your husband. he tells you things as they are. he doesn't pretend. everything with simon is the truth as he presents it, and it's eerily comforting, even if the truth isn't one that you like.
"i love you, simon," you whisper, and when you touch his face finally, the sting of the gold of your wedding is a welcome distraction.
he vows to make this the last time you see him this way. nothing is worth seeing that face of yours like this--tired, disheveled, the angry crease in your brow. you're not meant for these things. for the waiting, the crying, the worry, it's not a life he meant to give you.
for a moment, he wonders if you'd ever ask him.
will you hang it up for me? will you leave for me?
the most terrifying part, he realizes, is that he isn't sure of what his answer would be. and he isn't sure of what you would do if he told you no.
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miserycanary · 8 months ago
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BREAK MY HEART INTO TWO ᡣ𐭩 ⤷ next
pairing: Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley & fem!reader
synopsis: Ghost has been feeling pissed off lately, and happens to lash out on you
tags: slight angst, misunderstandings, very slight mention of violence
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He knew he was not in the right headspace. With the newly added task of training new recruits, the dead-end mission, and overall exhaustion. Ghost could feel his patience nearing nothing and he could feel it in his bones that he wouldn’t be able to control himself from lashing out soon— even if it was you. 
That’s why he started to distance himself and avoid you like the plague. Only responding with grunts or one-word answers. It’s not the best action but he couldn’t think of anything else. Despite the frustration clouding his mind, he still vows to never hurt you. He promised you that; reassured you that he would never ever raise his voice at you, his hand stroking your back and kissing your temple, after you told him about your past one drunken night. 
The first time Simon came home and didn’t immediately wrap his arm around you, nosing the crook of your neck, you knew something was up. You didn’t push the matter though. Brushing it off as something trivial and proceeding to go your usual routine. You did notice things that you never brought up with him: heavy footsteps, the lack of teasing from him, and uncharacteristically never clinging onto you  
What finally pushed you to visit the base was when Si, your husband who would go through all levels of hell just to be close to you and never lets a night pass without you with him in bed, suddenly tells you he will be sleeping on the couch. It baffled you. This is the same man who wrapped all his limbs around to keep you from leaving after a big fight. The same man that acts like a big baby when you tell him you’re gonna be away on a work event. Suddenly, the idea of him getting bored of you and finding entertainment with another woman intrusively swirled in your mind. 
Were you too loud? Too chatty? Clingy? Maybe you didn’t satisfy him enough. Maybe he wanted a wife available to always cook for him after work. It scared you. You love him; love him enough to change just to keep him.
You needed to talk to him. Whether he likes it or not. 
“Price, please. Just call him for me?” The captain looks at you, hesitating. Even though he was aware of Ghost’s thinning temper and didn’t want to put his comrade’s wife in a position that could result in a fight, he also knew that you needed to solve this. He scratches his beard, nervously looking at you. 
“Sweetheart, I don’t know. The man.. he.. he hasn’t been the best these days? Maybe you should go home and wait for him—“. You cut him off, “he doesn’t want to talk to me! Please, just 5 minutes and I won’t even cause a scene. I promise!” With a sigh, he finally relents and tells you to stay there while he calls for your husband. You crack a smile, nodding and feeling a sense of relief wash over you. 
Moments after being alone, a new recruit (you assume considering you’ve never met this man nor did Simon ever mention him) approaches you with a low wolf whistle. His hands find your waist before you can even comprehend what’s happening, pulling you close to his chest. 
“What’s a pretty little thing like you doing here?” You freeze, and disgust starts to bubble up inside of you. You plant your hand on his chest in an attempt to pull away in fear that Simon would witness this and think differently. Before you could say to leave you alone, a voice booms out. A voice you know too well. 
“Y/N!” Simon takes three strides and he was near enough to pull the recruit away from you and land a punch. Scandalous gasps went around while the yells of other members went inaudible to you. You stood there in horror as Price stepped in, pushing Ghost away and yelling to stand down. This was not your Simon. Your Simon would never be this violent in front of you— he was too scared to frighten you and do something to push you away. These weren’t the same hands carried you as if a delicate flower he plucked as well. The hands that routinely offers to brush your hair every night and washes you every sex session while he kisses your shoulders, showering you with endless praise with a voice filled with adoration.
Ghost whips his head. His cold stare made you falter, taking a step back. Something you never thought you’d do when faced with him. You could see his mask move, undoubtedly hiding his disappointment and furrowed eyebrows. 
“What are you doing here?” He seethes, roughly gripping your arm tight enough to leave a bruise.
“I-I... I wanted to see you—“ Before you could even finish, Ghost groans with frustration. “I fucking told you to not come to the base. Were you even thinking? Use that pea-sized brain of yours once in a while! Just.. leave me alone and go home.”
Silence. The whole base quiets down with his words, a tense atmosphere building up. You freeze. From the corner of your eye, you notice Price’s contort with concern and hesitation if he should meddle. 
The pain you felt was indescribable. It was as if Ghost took your heart and crushed it with his bare hands. Your breathing got labored, your eyes flicked down, taking deep breaths to hold back tears. Before the realization has fully settled, you pull away from Ghost, mumbling something incoherent. In that moment, Ghost knew he fucked up. He hurt his darling flower. He hurt the only person he treasured. The person that stayed with him through thick and thin. The person he married, vowed in front of God to love forever and to never hurt. 
“No, baby— I didn’t mean to—“
You cut him off, telling him you were going back just like he wanted. You didn’t even call it your home. You always do. Saying it with pride to have something to call home with him. 
God, what has he done? 
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꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱: dare I say this man needs a break :} Second part is out. Little detail: I use ‘Simon’ during Y/N’s pov and Ghost for the rest, but used Ghost for her after he yelled at her. :3
dividers by @cafekitsune
Please reblog!! Ask is open!
⟢ taglist is open!! Comment if you want to be tagged in the next posts.
check out my other works in the masterlist: ୭!
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xyras-maze · 25 days ago
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CAN WE JUST TALK ABOUT THIS?
THE WAY HE BURIED HIS FACE THERE?
THE WAY HE THREW AND CAUGHT HER LIKE SHE WEIGHS NOTHING?
I need this man please this isn't funny anymore
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khioneee · 22 days ago
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könig’s goodbye ritual.
he never leaves without kissing you. it’s become a sacred routine, grounding him before he steps out into the unpredictable world. no matter how chaotic his day is, the kiss is a small reminder that he has someone to come back to, someone who makes the madness bearable. it’s his way of saying i love you without needing words.
a quick peck as he runs out the door. even when he’s rushing, boots half-laced and jacket slung over his shoulder, he makes time for you. as he brushes past, his lips find yours—quick, soft, but intentional. it lasts only a second, but it leaves your heart warm, knowing that no matter how hurried things are, he’ll always make that time for you. ‘back soon,’ he mumbles between kisses as the door swings shut behind him.
when you’re asleep, he kisses you quietly. on early mornings when the world is still dark, könig tiptoes around the room, trying not to make a sound. before he leaves, he leans down, brushing his lips gently against your temple or cheek, his breath soft against your skin. his heart swells when you stir slightly, mumbling something incoherent before settling back into sleep. he’ll pull the blanket higher over your shoulders, gaze lingering for a moment longer than necessary, as if this kiss will protect you in his absence.
a long, deep kiss before deployment. before missions, the kisses are different—longer, deeper, filled with emotion he won’t allow himself to say aloud. his hands cradle your face, and his lips press against yours, slowly, like he’s memorizing you. like this kiss is a promise. he pulls away just enough to rest his forehead against yours, eyes fluttering shut. ‘be safe,’ you whisper. his thumb brushes over your cheek, and he kisses you again, as if to say i’ll come home to you. i swear it.
the goodbye kiss when he doesn’t want to leave. sometimes the hardest goodbye isn’t before a mission but on a normal day. when he’s leaving for just a few hours, but it feels like too long. his hands linger on your waist, lips brushing yours in a kiss that’s slow and tender. ‘i’ll be back before you know it,’ he murmurs against your mouth, but you both know he hates leaving you, even for a moment. the door finally closes behind him, but the warmth of his kiss stays with you, like a promise stitched into the quiet of your home.
no matter how brief or lingering, every kiss is a reminder for both of you. a reminder that no matter how far he goes, no matter how long he’s gone, könig’s heart stays with you. always.
. ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ an. this man makes me soft.
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yawnderu · 5 months ago
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Simon’s gut clenched, the pure heartbreak in your eyes lashing at his heart like whips. He choked back tears, swallowing the thick lump in his throat to keep himself from falling at your feet and begging to be forgiven. Deep inside, he knows it’s selfish to keep you with him. 
“‘M sorry.” His first confession is nearly muted by the traumatized, war-hardened soldier deep within his soul. 
“I’m so sorry. I asked for the leave, but bloody Makarov just…” He pauses, realizing that no matter how many excuses he comes up with, his mistake will never be forgiven. It doesn’t deserve any forgiveness, and that’s something he’s fully aware of, gnawing at his conscience from within. 
“I love you. I love both of you. I promise— no, I swear, that I won’t ever leave.” His gaze drifts down to the newborn baby in your arms. A tiny sweet girl, her big brown eyes looking at him with so much curiosity and love. For a second, it takes every ounce of strength for him not to reach out and hold her. 
Simon clenches his fists tightly, as if holding back the tide of emotions surging within him. The last thing he wanted was to be like his father— an absent bloody cunt, yet it seems like the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree no matter how much he tries.
The sight of the tears rolling down your cheeks feels like daggers straight to his soul, and yet a part of him thinks he’s not allowed to feel pain. Not when he let you be alone and scared in the delivery room, surrounded by nurses sporting expressions of pure pity for you. A first-time mother who kept insisting her husband was going to show up this one time. 
“I was so scared, Simon.” The first words you’ve told him the entire night hurt more than any bullet he’s ever taken. 
“I’m sorry, baby. I’m so fucking sorry.” He swallows the thick lump in his throat, hesitantly reaching out to brush the tears from your cheeks, his hands shaky. His dark eyes fix on your face, soaking you in, wanting to remember even the smallest detail. As exhausted as you are, you’re still the most beautiful woman he’s ever laid eyes on. 
“Let me make it right. I promise I’ll do everything to make up for it.” A grim part of his soul knows that this is just one of the many cracks in your marriage that will never be repaired. Still, the sincerity in his voice echoes in the room as he leans forward, pressing your foreheads together. 
“I can’t imagine how you felt, baby. How scared you must’ve been…” He whispers, his chest constricting. His gaze drifts down to your beautiful girl, tears brimming his eyes the moment her tiny hand reaches out to hold one of the straps from his gear. 
“I’m here now. I’ll never leave, I promise.” If finally hanging it up is what it takes to amend your marriage, he’ll do it. A small smile pulls at the corners of his lips, picturing being able to see his little girl grow up with the chances he never had, and despite knowing that he deserves the rawness of the moment, Simon makes it a life goal to be with you at all times. To fix everything he once broke.
From the ex-husband Simon series.
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tryingtoremembermyname · 2 years ago
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‘her dream ride is probably a jeep or something…’
my dream ride :
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criminalamnesia · 9 months ago
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the 141 x reader fic that you did was so yummy!!! pls make them suffer the wrath of reader and make 141 realise how much they need them when they leave,
your work is so amazing btw and your way with words is simply ✨chef’s kiss✨ (((o(*゚▽゚*)o)))♡
thank you!! here’s part 3 :)
ALL PARTS CAN BE FOUND HERE
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angry didn’t even begin to describe how you felt as you slammed the door to price’s office behind you.
you were tense, muscles taut and poised to fight. your fists clenched at your sides, blunt nails digging into your palms hard enough to hurt. your jaw was clenched, teeth grinding together as you resisted the urge to march back in there and unleash your fury.
no. not like this. not when you weren’t a hundred percent. not when they would still look at you like you were a wounded doe, stumbling around on broken legs.
in the back of your mind, you can hear that psychologist saying ‘this anger will eat you alive if you let it. you need to let it out somehow.’
you inhaled, unclenched your fists, and made up your mind. you pulled the iv from your arm, wincing at the pinch of the needle.
you left the iv pole standing there as you made your way to the gym.
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the gym was empty when you arrived, which made sense for this time of day. many would be occupied by drills or in the mess hall. others would be sleeping off long nights. you had the place to yourself, and you were grateful for the absence of watchful eyes and sweetened tongues.
you were tired of those who knew nothing acting like they knew something. of those who apologized or asked if you were okay. word spread like wildfire around base, and the subject of your ‘betrayal’ had been front-page news since the start of the witch hunt.
the gym door clicked shut behind you, and you surveyed the room. you knew your doctor would have a fit once you returned to the infirmary, and that she probably wouldn’t let you out alone again, but you didn’t really care.
you needed to let off some steam, and the best way you knew how was with your fists. either you start swinging at a bag or at a certain someone’s face. the bag won’t be condescending, and that makes your choice easy.
you approach one of the bright red punching bags in the corner. it’s scratched and taped from where someone had busted it open. scars that didn’t go away, that wouldn’t— just like yours.
you huffed. it didn’t do any good to start feeling sorry for yourself. you hadn’t done anything wrong. your team had.
you stretch your arms out in front of you, fingers interlocking to pop your knuckles. you catch sight of your severed finger, still healing. they’d recovered what had been chopped off, but hadn’t been able to save it.
just another permanent reminder, something to make sure you didn’t dare forget. you didn’t think you ever would regardless.
you shook out your hands and rolled your shoulders back. fists raised, you angled yourself towards the bag. feet spread, shoulders squared, thumb tucked under your fingers instead of inside. a stance that was second nature after years of sparring and hand-to-hand drills.
the bag was firm when your fist connected with it. you would have been lying if you said it didn’t hurt. you punched with the other hand— same results. the time you’d spent confined to an infirmary bed had done a number on you. muscles had atrophied, bones had weakened. the leg you’d suffered a bone-deep cut to shook under your weight.
you didn’t care. you kept punching, your breathing picking up as your emotions guided you. sweat dripped into your eyes and rolled down your back. you felt weak, physically and mentally. you hated feeling this way, and so you punched harder.
“slow down,” a voice grumbled from behind you.
you ignored him, continuing to punch the bag. you hadn’t heard the door open, nor heard the sound of him approaching, but you would have been surprised if you did.
simon always had a penchant for sneaking up on people, intentionally or not.
“gonna pass out if y’don’t stop,” he said after a minute. you could feel his eyes on you. you ignored him again.
you didn’t need to turn around to know he was standing there with his arms crossed, eyes full of something unreadable.
“stop,” he says firmly, and you sense his movement as he surges forward. his hand lands heavily on your shoulder, pulling you back from the punching bag. you heave in a breath before spinning around and punching him in the nose.
simon stumbles back a step, eyes widened slightly. for someone who prided himself on being so observant, he clearly didn’t see that coming. it made you feel the tiniest bit smug that you’d caught him off guard for once.
you dropped your hands to your knees then, squeezing your eyes shut as a wave of nausea washed over you. damn the bastard, he had been right. you shouldn’t have even been in here in the first place, let alone exerted yourself as much as you had.
your hands were shaking as you tried to pull yourself together. you opened your eyes to see drops of blood on the gym floor, by your feet. you had split your knuckles open.
there were also drops of blood at simon’s feet. you looked up then, slowly straightening your posture. he’d removed his mask, his face bare as he stared at you. blood dripped from his nose.
“gonna have to hit harder than that if y’want to break it,” he says, and you narrow your eyes at him.
“did you follow me in here?”
“no.” he says, and you’re giving a mirthless laugh.
“oh, please. im sure price sent you, yeah? you’ve always been his little lap dog. he says ‘jump’ and you say ‘how high,’ isn’t that right, lieutenant?”
your tone is tense, angry. you throw his title in his face, seeing as he’d been so quick to remind you of yours back in price’s office.
simon watches you, and you want to tackle him. he had always been quiet, always stoic. you’d been with him for years, but you still didn’t think you’d broken down all of his walls.
he was so good at masking his thoughts, his feelings. you weren’t. soap had always called you an open book. whenever you were mad or upset, everyone knew it.
no one knew anything about simon unless he wanted them to. it drove you mad then, and it was sure as hell driving you mad now.
“you need to get back to the infirmary,” he tells you. he wipes the back of his hand under his nose, smearing red across his skin. for a moment, you want to chastise him, reach up and wipe the remnants from his face.
you quickly shake that thought from your head. what is it they say— old habits die hard?
these habits would die if you had to strangle each one with your bare hands. anything you harbored for the four men on your team, for the one you’d called yours, was dead and gone.
“fuck off,” you tell him.
“why are you so damn stubborn?” he says then, and it’s the first time you’ve seen him start to crack since everything had happened. emotions are beginning to leak through his stony exterior, whether he means them to or not.
“you don’t get to tell me what to do anymore. none of you do,” you say, and you take a step forward then, eyes blazing as you stare up at him. “not after what you did.”
he doesn’t speak for a moment, as if gathering his thoughts. his eyes never leave yours.
“it shouldn’t have happened like that.” he tells you. you scoff.
“like that? you mean the four of you torturing me? tying me up and mutilating me like I was just another fucking target?” your voice was rising as you took another step forward, shoving a finger into his chest.
“if I’d treated you like another target,” he said, tone even. “you would’ve been dead.”
“so you showed me mercy, is that it?” you bared your teeth, a hollow laugh escaping your throat. “oh, thank you simon. I really felt that fucking mercy when you cut off my finger, and when you cut through layers of skin to get to bone.”
you inhaled before continuing. “I should be grateful then, right? is that what you want from me? for me to recognize your fucking ‘mercy’ and take you back? take you all back?”
he just stands there. you can see his jaw clench, but he makes no move to speak. you find it funny that he hasn’t even tried to apologize. john, your ever prideful captain, had swallowed his failure and pleaded for your forgiveness.
johnny and kyle would surely have done the same if they’d had the chance to speak to you, even if they only had a minute.
but simon? simon doesn’t. he doesn’t outwardly admit his wrongs. he doesn’t apologize. doesn’t seem sorry, even. you don’t know what’s going on inside his head, but you find yourself not really caring to know.
the fact that he can’t bring himself to admit, in blunt words, that he had astronomically fucked up and that he felt even the slightest bit of remorse, told you everything you needed to know.
cold, stoic ghost. you hadn’t been afraid of him when you’d first joined the squad, and you weren’t afraid of him now.
but back then, you’d wanted to break down those stone walls of his. you’d wanted to be someone he felt safe around, someone who knew him inside and out.
now, you’re packing your time with him into a box in your mind and dumping it into the trash. simon riley means nothing to you now.
“take your mercy and shove it up your ass,” you tell him. you step back and drop your hand, your eyes still locked on his.
“and by the way,” you say as you start towards the door. he doesn’t turn around, doesn’t move an inch. it’s as if he’s rooted to the spot.
“you should’ve just killed me.”
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author’s note:
not really sure how I feel about this one tbh. I have plans for a part four, but I’m not quite sure how long I’ll be making this series.
and as for simon— I want to write an extra part about his thoughts/feelings about everything. let me know if that’s something you’d be interested in!
anyways, let me know your thoughts please :) (I honestly may end up deleting this and rewriting it when I’m not tired lol)
taglist: @preeyansha @igotmajordaddyissues @nanatheoaktree @aesthetic0cherryblossom @oceanicexolorer @soph121212 @liv2post @cupid-eclipse @angels-despair18 @k4marina
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callsign-datura · 3 months ago
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"fuck," simon whispers, a mix of warmth and pain swelling in his chest as you moan his name. pretty body splayed beneath his, your soft unmarred hand planted against his, fingers intertwined as his eyes flickered to the glinting diamond on your finger. his eyes narrow and his brows furrow, twisting his handsome face into something close to a grimace. the sight of the diamond has his chest clenching. you still wore the ring, even after your divorce. "simon-- simon, please," you whisper, in that whiny, pleading tone that he remembers so well. begging him like you did the night you both got married, yet this time, it's been years. you were so close, yet so far. You left him because he was never home, even when he promised and retired. something always had his attention that wasn't you, and he'd regretted it. it felt like his entire life crashed down around him whenever he came home and found the house deathly still. he shakes his head, leaning forward on the hand positioned between your arm and your side, picking up his pace as his hips snap against the back of your thighs and your ass, fat cock plunging into your sopping pussy as you squeezed around him and your mouth curled into an o-shape, your head falling back and giving him space as he buries his face into your neck. he moves one hand to your lower back, lifting you up against his hulking body as he pulls you closer in an attempt to reach deeper. and he does. his tip knocks against your cervix, and when you jolt and grunt, he backs off just a bit, internally cursing himself for causing you any pain. "m'so sorry love," he murmurs, his raspy voice sending shudders through you. truthfully you missed him. truthfully, leaving him left a hole in your chest that you couldn't fill. he felt the same, but something in him wasn't allowing him to come back to you permanently. "s-simon, i need you," you cry, your throat feeling tight as tears sting the corners of your eyes and you lift your hips, trying to stave off the desperation and sorrow with pleasure. "p-please stay this time..." you murmur, but your pleas go heard, but unanswered. his pace increases, and he feathers soft gentle kisses over your throat. kisses of a lover, he thinks, kisses of a lover that he could have been to you. your entire body is hot, and the coil in your stomach grows ever tighter as his pace grows firm. slow, deep rolls of his hips that has the tip of his cock hitting your g-spot so deliciously, the feeling ripping a shaky moan from your throat. your hands find their place in his hair, tugging at the blonde locks and bringing your legs around his waist. your whimpers become pleasured cries and his grunts become shaky curses. "i love you, i love you, i love you," he repeats in your ear, tilting his head and nibbling at the flesh of your shoulders before finding a thicker part of your flesh to bite down on, grunting as he bucks his hips into yours. his cock is so heavy, it makes you feel so full. you missed this feeling.
his hands found the back of your thighs, pushing your legs forward as he lifted up and held the back of your knees to keep you in that position. dark, deep brown eyes rove over you with a mix of love and desire, his gaze lingering on your tits that jiggle with each of his movements before they flicker to meet yours. you look up at him with teary eyes, exhaustion and desperation filling your expression as your nose stings with unexpressed emotion.
his lips curl into what is supposed to be a soft, reassuring smile, but it does nothing. your head falls back and your chest twists, a sniffle breaking from you as you cry out. your orgasm falls over you in a heavy wave, leaving you gasping as tears roll down the sides of your face. he gives you a few moments, his thrusts slowing to a halt, your sorrow making his chest tighten as he leans down to kiss your face, hushing you softly. he didn't need to cum. this was more about you, after all.
exhaustion settles over you, and your eyes grow bleary and your body grows limp. he slowly withdraws from you, pulling a blanket over your tired body. he stands up and pulls his boxers and jeans on, buttoning them and pulling up the zipper as he watches you. his chest grows heavy, and tears sting in his eyes as well. he wants to stay, but he doesn't trust himself enough to just walk into your life again. your begging makes his heart tear in half, and he can still hear it. "s-simon, i need you," and that pathetic shake that comes with it. fuck. he's so fucking stupid. he turns his back on you after pulling his hoodie on-- leaving his shirt on the bed for you when you wake up, but nothing else.
once again, he disappears. the only reason he ever comes back is to remind you that yes, he does still love you, he does still miss you, he still can't live without you. but you don't know that... he never tells you. you always wake up dazed and confused the next day, tears leaving your eyes as you remember his confusing arrival and departure, looking around and finding an item he left behind-- something he does on purpose. you pick it up, clutch it to your chest and sob. you don't understand why he leaves every time. why can't he just stay? he hates himself for hurting your feelings, for mixing up your pretty little head every time he shows up. "why can't you just stay?" you'd text him, and he wouldn't answer.
he doesn't know the answer.
he wishes he could stay, but he doesn't.
and he won't.
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v1x3n · 3 months ago
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sinkovia · 9 months ago
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Simon Riley hated photographs, but still, you begged him to take pictures together, eager to preserve the precious memories you created.
Simon, glued to his convictions, had always refused no matter how many times you begged.
But what if our memory is not enough? What if we forget what we had together?
I promise you, love. As long as I'm breathing, I'll never let that happen. Our memories will always be enough for me.
Out of respect for his wishes, you had reluctantly ceased your requests, choosing to cherish the moments you shared in the fleeting present. You got rid of all the old photos of yourself, telling yourself that if Simon didn’t need them neither did you.
Now, standing alone before your casket, Simon's regret weighed heavy on his heart like an anchor dragging him down into the depths of despair. He longed for a tangible memento of your time together, a photograph to serve as a beacon of light amidst the darkness of his grief. 
But time, that relentless thief of memories, had a cruel way of distorting even the most cherished recollections. 
With each passing year, the image of you grew increasingly hazy in his mind, slipping through his fingers like grains of sand in an hourglass. Desperate to hold onto the essence of you, Simon turned to the only medium he knew.
Drawing.
With trembling hands and a heavy heart, he painstakingly sketched your features from memory, pouring his soul into each stroke of the pencil. 
But the passage of time had a way of eroding even the most vivid memories , and each attempt to capture you resulted in a different interpretation, leaving Simon haunted by the ever-shifting image of the one he loved.
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