#must protect sweet lil bean

[rottiens]

✮ tags. . canon au, satoru x no sorceress reader, neighbor!satoru, pinning, sfw (except maybe at the end, but it's nothing explicit).

✮ notes. . just a silly lil thing I had on the wips, this was way before the manga ended only now I've been encouraged to finish it, I think, it goes along with how the manga ended (no spoilers!) and is just a glimpse maybe at satoru's canon personality (I miss him painfully). divider creds: cafekitsune.

✮ wc. 1.9K

It has always been written in Satoru's nature that he must protect others. Even before he was born, his destiny was marked by the six-eyed ancestor, and the person before him and then the one before that.

He has taken on the role of caretaker of others long before he could have the choice to decide if he wanted it. In his hands is the power to care for his students, his clan, and every sorcerer he knows and those he doesn't even know. The weight of responsibility this puts on him over time has faded, with years of experience Satoru has learned to take the weight off the stress that comes with his responsibility as the strongest and has decided to accept his fate, without much thought to the title that haunts him wherever he goes, he was not simply Satoru, he was the strongest, always.

When called he goes, when ordered he acts. He attends mission after mission, traveling from one city to another and gets to the apartment he bought near the center of the city to flop down on the softness of the expensive mattress, often too tired to take off his uniform, shoes or blindfold, he lets the darkness of the place, the nearby noise of the air conditioner and the light traffic of the street pamper him.

Now that he thinks about it, he doesn't remember the last time he took a vacation or, he can't be that greedy; he just doesn't remember the last day he had off where he could have gone to the sea, sunbathed and sunk his feet in the sand, unless this wasn't part of a mission one way or the other. And that's fine, although he doesn't like to see himself as it, he's just another tool of the system and the tools....

Bang, bang, bang!

Satoru lifts his head from the boiling coffee pot with the brown puddle inside it looking like a fountain, he leans further over the countertop paying attention to the sound that seems to be coming from his front door. Something hard, solid, seems to hit the wood, not a fist... it must be something else, he deduces at once.

The coffee pot goes silent and the aroma of fresh coffee beans escapes throughout his kitchen. Satoru lifts his back and walks barefoot towards the entrance, whoever was behind he couldn't sense it. It wasn't Shoko, obviously he could smell her cigarette from inside if it was, the person whoever it was... it didn't smell like anything, and Satoru was curious about it.

“Hello?” your voice is soft, sweet as candy, or at least that's how Satoru perceives it. And being a sugar addict, he can't help but take a step forward, deciding to finally open the door before your fist, or whatever else you're using to interrupt his quiet morning, knocks a third time.

“Hey.” Satoru stops a flirtatious smile that he disguises with a polite one. Friendly. Like the good neighbor he is.

Satoru could be living much closer to Jujutsu High, in the modern condo just a block away, ideal for always being on time. But where would be the fun in being early every day? Even though with just a snap of his fingers he could show up in the middle of the classroom whenever he wanted, he likes to use the distance as an excuse whenever someone asks him why he was late.

Actually, Satoru doesn't know anyone in the neighborhood. He always comes late at night and leaves at dawn, sometimes before the sun even rises; so he doesn't remember seeing you before. And if he ever did, as someone with no cursed energy, you would have gone totally unnoticed.

“Can I help you with something?” he asks, trying not to make his confusion sound abrupt, though his brows furrow a bit as he watches you curiously.

You are contemplated like a bug under a microscope, with your neighbor's glowing blue eyes you feel stalked, small even. His eyes catch all the light in the hallway, they seem to glow and his dilated pupils catch your attention causing that no matter how much you avoid him, you always end up returning to his gaze, not to mention how tall he is and how peculiar his white hair is, unlike him, you prefer not to stare.

He finds you interesting, he can't stop looking at you. The only other person he knew incapable of being able to feel was dead now. So you were something unique to him, something that arouses genuine interest in him.

“This.” A box, almost your size in your hands. On top, a yellow envelope. “It's yours, I received these packages a few weeks ago and I meant to return them to you earlier but whenever I stopped by you weren't home...”

His frown deepens for a second before replacing it with a relaxed expression. He finds the situation strange, taking into account that he is never home, he buys everything he needs in person, he rarely shops online so he doubts that someone has sent packages in his name, to his address.

Anyway, he decides to accept it when he sees your trembling fingers clutching the box. He takes it from your arms and you let out a grateful groan, whatever is inside is heavy.

“Thank you,” you say. Satoru catches you looking him up and down, he had barely gotten out of the shower after coming in from running a few miles.

His hair was dry, somewhat fluffy giving him a relaxed look, and dark gray sweatpants are hanging off his hips. He's wearing a white cotton t-shirt that still clings a bit to his skin from the heat of the bathroom.

“Do you want to come in for a cup of coffee?” the question leaves his lips almost automatically, and while his tone is nonchalant, Satoru waits curiously. You've probably already noticed the particular aroma wafting from his apartment, that mix between fresh coffee and something a little more mysterious. There's nothing wrong with the invitation, is there? After all, he's just trying to be a good neighbor, even if, deep down, the truth is that he wants to catch something from you, to find a way to feel your presence, to get to know you a little better as he does with anything that piques his interest.

You smile, with that reserved touch, and bring your hands behind your back, tucking them into the pockets of your shorts as you sway subtly on your heels. And even though he can't sense your energy, he almost seems to predict your response just by watching you.

“Maybe later.” Sure.

He didn't expect you to walk into a stranger's place just for coffee, he had to take a chance anyway.

“Thanks again, neighbor.”

He doesn't try to sound flirtatious but he does. You're cute, you're his type and you're not a sorceress, that just makes you more irresistible to a person who is used to always keeping control of everything that happens around him.

That morning with the box in your hands that, later, he realized was full of books and manuscripts that were sent from his clan to deliver to the school library, was the first time Satoru saw you. From then on he tried to make the encounters between the two of you less and less casual and more planned.

At first it was difficult, arranging his busy schedule in such a way that he would sometimes meet you in the hallways, taking the elevator or opening the door to your place in such a way that it seemed coincidental but Satoru succeeded. Within a few weeks he had learned about your schedule when you were at home, so he was always looking for an excuse for him to be around at the same time.

In between casual conversations, he began to get to know you better, discovering where you came from and how long ago you had moved into the big building. Satoru realized that you weren't just a pretty face; you had a good heart, an apartment decorated with real plants, and a cat that ran to greet you at the door with a meowing song, brushing against Satoru's legs in greeting.

After a couple of months, you had created a routine that he found comforting. He was next to you in this utopian bubble where no one else existed, a place where he didn't have to be alert all the time.

And... where was he? Right. The tools, the system and all that.

Tools like him don't think or make decisions; they're designed only to be used when they're needed. But with you, he felt like a regular man, one who didn't see curses crawling down the hallway trying to pierce your home, or one who wasn't constantly overstimulated by the energy that engulfed the world, one who wasn't aware of the changes in the cursed energy of others. With you, he was, really, just Satoru Gojo; one who didn't know he could be something more, someone more than the title he was given at birth. He was an ordinary high school teacher, and you were just you; you saw him as something more than the strongest and there was something beautiful for the first time in the raw idea of being nothing more than a mere human.

For the first time, he didn't feel his responsibility as a burden, but as a gift. It was the first time he didn't feel overwhelmed or with a bad taste in his mouth for being a tool, because now he could use it to take care of you. It was the first time he felt good about the responsibility of caring for someone like you.

“What do you think?” You're about to fall asleep on his couch, a couch he only uses when you come to visit him, so Satoru thinks he can't waste the opportunity to admire you up close. Watching your moles, how smooth your skin looks, the sweat dampening your collarbone and how much he wishes he could drink it.

When caught staring like a stalker, he doesn't flinch; he simply brings his eyes back to yours. You have one eye squinted watching him, while the other struggles to stay open, the dialogue from the show in the background fading like white noise.

“You're tired.” You snort before closing your eyes completely.

“I'm not. I want to finish this episode with you,” you say, clearly drowsy, snuggling further into the couch and clinging to the cushion between your legs, which Satoru wishes was his head. He sighs, feeling a tug on his ribs.

“Why don't you sleep for a while?” he suggests, playing ping pong between your lips and your face.

You purr something intelligible as the fist holding your chin weakens slowly while the dialogue on the television ends and the white letters begin to slowly scroll across the screen. Satoru consumes you with his gaze, inclined to touch you and settle you better on the softness of his couch. His heart is pounding in his chest and he feels his shorts tighten. The skin of your arm so warm under his knuckles, just as he had thought, and he thinks if he set his mind to it he could watch you sleep all day.

In a moment of hesitation, Satoru moves a little closer, feeling the warmth of your breath brush against his face, your lips pout indicating the level of relaxation you're in. Fuck. Just before he can do something he shouldn't, he jumps up and heads for the kitchen, where he grabs a glass of cold water and rushes to the bathroom, locking the door behind him and yanking down his shorts.

[pedge-page]

How do you think readers love aggression would be towards baby Sarah and Joel. Cuddling even though she still thinks it’s not close enough (I’m talking wanting to literally be in their skin) , kisses, love nibbles on the cheek, repeat.

When Sarah was in lil baby infant stage but just starting to plump up like a fat bean from all that milk, preggo wife couldn't get enough of those cheeks. You'd literally nibble and much on them, sucking them in your mouth and letting out with a pop. Sarah was confused but got used to it and didn't mind you were leaving basically hickies on her cheeks so they were always rosy.

Or putting her stinky little feet all up your nose and face. Just absolutely obsessed with her grippers and bitty toes. Giving them a big waft and going "stinkytoestinkytoes!" As she giggles below. You urge Joel to give em a good sniff and he's just at a point where he doesn't know how normal this is for new mom behavior because he definitely doesn't obsess over Sarah's stinky toes the way they bring you such joy.

And you'd always hold her. Like if there was an inconvenient moment that could have been solved If you just put her down, you wouldn't. You HAD to hold her everywhere doing everything. Joel couldn't cuddle you unless Sarah was between you. Dropped something? Your feet could grab it and toss it up. Even when Joel offers to hold her, you pull away offended that he would take your baby away.

Joel set up the whole nursery just for Sarah and yet you somehow managed to drag all the furniture into your bedroom, cramming it up but ensuring she wouldn't need to leave your sight at night.

Eventually she's at a point where she can sleep In her own crib for more than 3 hours at a time, and with a baby monitor all set up, it was time for the parents bedroom to go back to being parents only.

Except that STILL didn't stop you because each time he woke up, Sarah was STILL in his bed between you two in the morning.

"And how did she get there, sweetie?" He asks rhetorically for the 4th night.

"Must have floated in..." you shrug.

Joel catches you again sneaking out and going for Sarah and carries you back to bed.

You both hear Sarah crying , and with a tricky wiggle, you escape his grasp and rush to her room. She stops crying the second you pick her up and coo her.

"She needs to learn to self soothe!"

"She can self soothe--with me!"

And he's trying to get you to sleep but you're always up for her, wanting any excuse to bring her to your arms at night.

Eventually Joel finds you crying, sitting in defeat pawing at Sarah's door as she cries inside because Joel wouldn't let you in, and you're both just crying for each other like its torture at 3am being apart.

As for Joel:

Regular arm biting randomly during a movie or when he's got his arm slung around you and his juicy beef is within range.

Tommy makes comments that you always leave such... potent love bites during sex but it's not even during sex. You just randomly nip him like an affectionate shark.

If the whole couch is available, you'll sit damn near right on top of him just to do your own thing.

Kissing his scruff then again, then a big fat wet long one, and he loves how you trail to mark his jaw and neck, unntil you're just suckling his ear lobes and he's like 'ok that wasn't going where i thought it was' and has to tone his boner down as it's not you "trying to make out with him to make love" time, it's you "trying to eat him comfortingly out of love" time.

Or randomly you'll just nuzzle into him, arms wrapped tightly around his chest like hes a pillow, digging your toes into his calves because he's so strong and burly and yours that you whisper "I want to be inside you."

And Joel gives you the wildest look like you just suggested THAT. But your face is so innocent and sweet and smiley that he doesn't understand how you just said THAT without actually meaning THAT.

Hes running away with his hands grabbing his ass protectively as you're chasing him begging to live inside him, the whole time the two of you are misunderstanding one another.

[dramalets]

Darling @blneobin tagged me in the 10 BL characters you want carnally thing. I am a dumb lil gray ace queer so I expect I have a different definition of want carnally than some 😂. But I will persist regardless. (I picked gals and guys because 🤷🏻‍♀️)

Mork - My Ride

He’s a puppy dog. He just wants to love and be loved in return and I would never ever get tired of looking at that dimple. Also you get his awesome uncles as throw in bonus. No way to lose here.

Ink - Bad Buddy

I just love her so much. I’m a useless lil femme with a competency kink a mile wide and dang does she hit it. The way she’s so sure of her self and what she wants, but is never arrogant about it, and how she treats Pa like the princess she is. A dream.

Pisaeng - Be My Favourite

Patient, loyal, great at love and excellent at self reflection. (Maybe I do just want a dog, damn.) The sacrifice he’s willing to make in episode 12 just got me right in the gut. I’d loved him the whole series but that was the Cherry. I’m just a Kawi looking for my Pisaeng.

Yu Na - Semantic Error

I’m ace not blind. I need this women to pin me down and tell me off. *ahem* Where did that come from. Anyways. She’s stunning, funny and a great friend.

Jim - Moonlight Chicken

He’s absurdly beautiful firstly. But I also love the way he learns. He admits his faults and works on them, that’s a decent human being right there. Plus Y’know he must be great in bed because Wen was HOOKED from the off. 😂

King - Bed Friend

Right. Not only is this man’s beauty a reason to believe in god he’s also just a wholly good bean. He never pressures Uea, he always meets him where he’s at, and he LEARNS. He makes mistakes and he admits those and learns from them. Cat kink aside he’s a great example of husband material.

Korn - Together with me

Listen, is he perfect? Absolutely not lol. But he’s the original standard for muscle bound Himbo pups and I adore him. (And those kisses? God damn.) *that gif is not Korn but if you search Korn you get the band so shh.

Tinn - Laws of attraction

The entire package. Hot, sweet, protective and good with kids. Those arms????? Get out.

Nim - The Warp Effect

Honestly she’s just hot, confident and gets very delulu when she’s in love. She can box me anytime she likes. (High key also wanted to pick her partner Molly too so you get a gif with both ✌🏻)

Pure - My gear your gown

This is a weird pick I realise 😂. Pansexual king, problematic in a lot of ways but loyal, loving and kind. Also he does actually listen to Folk and I feel they actually probably would have had a healthy relationship long term. Idk man. He’s just a great friend, confident in sex stuff and funny. Also v pretty. (All his gifs are from Shadow and fuck me I am NEVER watching that.)

If you read this far 😽

If you’d like to do this pls do! (And tag me.) It was a fun waste of time.

[eunchancorner]

I give you clearance to ramble about whichever OCs you want :> go wild

OK

SO

I have several ocs so I'mma go down the list starting with my Spooky Month ocs. Maybe one day I'll ramble about my Welcome Home ocs too-

(This is every oc but Sasha, since I already rambled about her)

Eun (aka my sona) SO. This is a bit complicated. Eun and their sister somehow made their way to a Catholic orphanage that was established in like, 1960, and still follows most of those rules. Their sister got extremely sick and ended up dying, then Eun befriended a cat and got adopted by Lila after Skid got upset about not being able to have an older sibling before Lila realized... 'Wait holy shit you can-'

Mariana Cross She's one of my lil goth girls who actually loves anything cutecore. Her mom was a werewolf but her dad isn't so a genetic mutation happened and instead of turning every full moon, she just has paws instead of feet. She hangs out with the hauntiest house gang a lot and has a crush on... well, most of them. She's just a sweet little pan bean

Lilliana Cross This is Mariana's older sister. She ended up with her mother's werewolfism but is able to control it far better thanks to growing up with it. She's completely lost use of her arm after (call me cringe) saving John's daughter from the fire after hearing her and seeing the fire while on a walk. She's currently living out of one of her dad's old warehouses and doing the best she can to help people. (She also may or may not be dating Ignacio)

Seraphina Discord Now this bitch. She was originally made for a Captain Bob character AI rp, but I couldn't stop myself. Originally she was made to be a fearless captain who, so far, has fought a terrifying sharklike beast, befriended the shark hybrid, Captain Bob Velseb, and lost her leg to the beast I mentioned earlier. Adapted into other AUs, however, she's that person in the horror movie who kills the monster. Despite her outwardly cold, antisocial, and fearless demeanor, inside she's affectionate... and terrified. She fears what may come after her next...

Jasper Scoreson This is my genderfluid bean, Jasper. They're about the Hatzgang's age and live in a not-so-nice household. He's allowed to dress how he wants inside, but outside he has to dress like a 'proper boy', although she much prefers dressing in more femme clothes. Their house is also very restricting right down to what he's allowed to look up or even eat around his parents.

Juno Henderson She's a bubbly little sweetheart who can easily be described as the girliest of all. She loves everyone and everything, and is my darling lil lesbian bb. Like I love this lil bean sm you have no idea- BUT. But. I can't have a normal oc. That's just not allowed. So she's a cultist, and quite a useful one at that. She's quick and seemingly trustworthy, allowing her to round up sacrifices with ease, whether with persuasion or by force. However she doesn't like doing the sacrificing, leave that to Atticus.

Arina Doiteain Another cultist lesbian girl, but far more butch. Also a massive arsonist, which means her and Ignacio get along not-so-surprisingly well. She sees Juno as a little sister that she must protect at all costs (despite Juno being able to defend herself perfectly fine. But she doesn't mind!) She was actually my second oc that I wanted to impose as a villain but I couldn't do it and just made her a cultist instead

[taegularities]

Hello lovely Rid 💕💕💕

First of all...

okaaaaay 👀👀👀 I don't like seeing sad Jungkook (or sad Rid for that matter) but short hair Jungkook makes me crazy, so I'll take it.

Also I wanted to ramble about who I'm a bigger simp for, since you posted that cruel poll making me choose.

So basically, I'm really really obsessed with c&f Jungkook and I can't even pinpoint the exact reason why? I've said this before but I've never been more whipped for a man who I don't fully trust so quickly. There was just something about him that had me from the beginning, even with his very questionable looking intentions. So I'm a big simp for him in a more base level way? Like it's almost involuntary lmaooo.

And then for cmi Jungkook... I mean he has my whole heart. He might be my favourite fictional Jungkook ever actually... Literally all sides of him (that we've seen so far) I'm in love with. Just writing about him right now has me going 🥺🥺🥺. I'm ready to protect him at all costs and he also makes me crazy (in all kinds of ways). maybe i'll save the love letter for him for the cmi anniversary i mean what?

I love both of them a lot though. Thinking about both the c&f epilogue and cmi8 gives me emotional whiplash.

Other than that though, how are you doing, Rid? I saw that you're feeling a little sick and once again I'm ready with all the virtual blankets and tea and hugs since I can't take care of you irl 🥺 I hope you get through it very very soon!!!

I've been feeling very emotional and a little melancholic myself recently. But today I listened to d day and it actually made me feel loads better, Yoongi just always knows how to comfort 🥺 I also got started on a paper that I'm excited to write, for which I received unexpectedly good feedback while I was still at the planning stages! Trying to focus on the good things and set up a good base for when my exam season starts.

I hope you feel better soon Rid, sending you all of my love 💞💞💞

IVI LOL, you really do point out the subtlest things !!! did not think anyone would catch that haircut bit, but look at you :'))

i think you're a simp for c&f jk bc you know a good man when you see one... despite his initially questionable behaviour, he truly is a sweet bean who tends to act monstrous (in bed) at times lmao so i understand the obsession... :')

and i know, cmi jk is just 😭 thank you for loving him so much, tbh he might be my fav jk i've written so far too :(( my lil baby :(( and i can't wait for his return :((((

thank you, ivi !! :') i hate that this happens, idk why i get colds so frequently ?? like i spent most of yesterday and today napping and it sucksss lmao i want to be productive, too :') but i'll take the blankets i love you 🤍🥺 so happy you've been well !! despite the melancholy... i get that feeling. there must be something in the air, bc everyone's been very emotional these days. i'm so glad you have stuff you can look forward to, though, and i hope that mood stays bc you deserve it 💕

(also i've been wanting to say this — i know you said i don't need to be, but im so sorry for being slow with answering at times... you send such thoughtful and incredibly kind thoughts and then i feel bad. but i want to answer just as thoughtfully and the current time has been beating my ass lmao sorry again but i love you rambling and will always get to it bc i love you so fkn much 😭🥺🤍)

[atomic-taco-muffin]

Karina: *puts a hand on his cheek* are you trying to confess your love for me?

He does and it's adorable 😍)

Zexion: mhm

Tamaki is a sweet lil bean that must be protected!!!!

[sergeantbuckybarnes]

thirsty // tom holland

Summary: You and Tom read some thirst tweet for a BuzzFeed’s video

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Word count: 1.4k

Warnings: suggestive

A/N: As always, remember English is not my first language. Also, thanks to @amandalove​ for proofreading this! 💙

I got all of the thirst tweets from the BuzzFeed videos and some for Tom from an article from them. I don’t own any of them.

main masterlist

“Hi guys, I’m Y/N Y/L/N.”

“And I’m Tom Holland.”

“We are at BuzzFeed and we’re going to read some thirst tweets.”

Tom held the bucket for you and you picked a piece of paper. “Y/N Y/L/N is literally the most beautiful human ever. Goodbye,” you read. That was a very good start. “Have you seen Megan Fox or Blake Lively? There are so many more beautiful people out there.”

Your boyfriend took the paper from your hand. “I agree with them,” he said, staring straight at the camera and pointing at you. “Have you looked at her? She’s a work of art.” You smiled at him and leaned to place a kiss on his cheek. “Thank you, love.”

“Tom Holland is a precious bean, protect him,” Tom read. “That’s sweet. We are starting soft.”

“I think it’s gonna get worse as we continue.” You have watched some of the other celebs videos before so you knew what you got yourself into, and you knew things could get very spicy.

“Y/N Y/L/N is like a fine mixture of sexy and cute and seductive like damn girl. Thank you, I’m flattered. This is really boosting my self-esteem.”

“Tom Holland isn't just a snack he's the whole meal,” your boyfriend read. “That wasn’t that bad.”

”Y/N Y/L/N can choke me and run me over and I would say thank you and sorry for the dent in the car,” you laughed. You have seen a lot of tweets like these addressed to other people, but you never thought you would get one.

“Why would someone want to be run over by a car?” Tom asked confused. “People are into some weird shit.”

You wiped a tear from your laughing and handed the bucket to him. “I saw Spider-Man last night and Tom Holland is the purest thing in this world which is saying something because my dog exists. That’s nice. Thank you.”

“If I ever met @YOURUSERNAME I would let her roar the fuck out of me.” You frowned. “What does roar mean?”

“Whatever it is, she wouldn’t do it. Sorry, mate.” Tom took the paper from your hands and tossed it aside.

You held the bucket for him and he picked his next tweet “Tom Holland has set the standard for all Spiderman's and that's the tea.”

You nodded in agreement. “Very true.” You picked another tweet out of the bucket “Y/N Y/L/N is one fine azz woman. Thank you. That’s… that’s nice.”

“When are people going to realize that Tom Holland truly is one of the best actors of our generation?”

“I ask myself that every day,” you quickly replied.

“Thank you, that’s very kind of you to think that,” Tom said before picking a tweet and handing it to you.

“Y/N Y/L/N looks a lot Iike my next girlfriend,” you read, and before you even had the chance to respond, your boyfriend did it for you.

“Maybe somewhere else in the multiverse, but not in this one. Sorry, mate.”

You weren’t gonna argue with that.

“Tom Holland shirtless in Spider-Man Homecoming is my new obsession.”

“And you saw that through a screen. Imagine seeing it in person.” You faked being sweaty, and your boyfriend laughed at your antics.

You picked out another one. “I don’t think I can handle how hot Y/N Y/L/N is. I’m crying. Don’t cry. I’m not all that hot — “

“Yes, you are.” Your boyfriend argued with your statement.

You look at him. “I look like shit when I wake up.”

Tom looked at you with a serious expression on his face. “No, you don’t. You always look stunning.”

You smiled at him. “You’re too sweet to me.”

“Just honest.”

“Daily reminder: Tom Holland is daddy af.”

“Oh, remember that time we were at the mall and someone yelled “zaddy” to you?” You laughed at the memory and looked straight at the camera. “If you are watching this, thank you. You made my day.”

"Y/N's boobs are my favorite thing." You covered your face in embarrassment. “Um… Thank you. My boobs appreciate your compliment.”

“I mean… Your boobs are amazing but your personality is way much better.” You felt your heart melt at your boyfriend's words.

“I love how everyone can agree that Tom Holland is hot af and daddy material, even the lesbians,” he read. “That’s… that’s a really nice one.”

“You are keeping that?” You laughed when you saw that he didn’t toss it out. Instead, he put it inside his pocket.

“I’m gonna hold onto that one.”

You shook your head and picked another tweet for you. “Y/N Y/L/N can get it anytime.”

“She doesn’t want it. But thank you for the offer.” Tom took the tweet from your hand and tossed it aside just like he had done before with the previous tweet.

“Tom Holland is both sexy and cute and it’s really affecting my sanity”

“Same, girl,” you commented, and picked out another tweet. “Y/N Y/L/N owns my ass.”

“She already owns an ass, and it’s a great one if I say so myself.”

“You do have a lil cute ass.”

Your boyfriend looked at you offended, “I don’t have a lil ass.”

You laughed, “I know. I’m just kidding, love.”

You handed the bucket to him and he picked a piece of paper, "My ideal weight is Tom Holland on top of me."

“Mine too!” you grinned.

“Oh my god… Mum, if you're watching this, please stop.”

You laughed and picked another tweet from the bucket. “Y/N Y/L/N can stick her tongue down my throat I guess.”

“I guess I can, but I’m not going to.” You shrugged. “Sorry to disappoint.”

“I think if Tom Holland were any more perfect, my eyes would have a meltdown and I’d go blind. That’s very nice. But I’m far from perfect.”

“You are perfect for me.”

Your boyfriend’s gaze filled with adoration landed on you. “Thank you, darling.” He pulled your chair closer to him as he threw an arm around you and placed a kiss on your temple.

“Y/N Y/L/N is the most perfect human ever, I love her so much. I wish I could rub her nipples & lick cheese off her butt.” This one made you a little uncomfortable. “Um… that’s really specific.” You didn’t know what else to say.

“You shouldn’t put that on the internet.” Tom's voice was serious and you could see how he was clenching his mouth. You put a hand on his legs, letting him know everything was fine.

“I’ll pretend that my body pillow is Tom Holland.”

“I’ll tell you, he is an amazing pillow but he is MY pillow. So back off.” You turned to look at your boyfriend, he was given an amused look to you. “Any comments?”

“Not at all, ma’am.”

“Y/N Y/L/N I love you with your glowing skin and your perfect face I just want to hug you bc you are the love of my life. This is probably one of the sweetest things ever.” You looked down at the tweet again. “I’m keeping this, I’m gonna frame it and look at it when I’m sad.”

“Tom Holland fuck me in the ass with that English accent,” he read. “Is that even possible?” Tom frowned looking at the tweet and then giving the camera a confused look.

“Why does it have to be him, though?” you questioned. “Hiddleston, Paul, and Ben also have English accents. So, you know, go and ask them.”

“I can’t believe Y/N Y/L/N invented being sexy,” you laughed. “I find it hard to believe, to the point of knowing that’s not true.” You paused for a second, before speaking again. “Who was it that invented being sexy?” you wondered. “Like, when was sexy invented?”

“Is that something that worries you now?”

“Well, it’s an interesting subject!” You defended yourself before handing the bucket to your boyfriend. “This is the last one, better be good.”

“I have a whole Pinterest board dedicated to Tom Holland’s abs because fine art must be recognized.”

“Yeah, girl!” you beamed. “Also, can you share that board with me?” you whispered like it was a secret. “And that’s it… It wasn’t that bad.”

Your boyfriend glanced at you. “That’s your opinion.”

“Oh c’mon, you can’t tell me you didn’t have fun!”

“I would rather be roasted by Anthony and Sebastian.”

“That’s saying a lot…”

[thecoolestcactus-blog]

So, I drew keef being a sweet lil angsty fuck too pure for this world, and I felt like this would be a good first post on this fine Establishment of a website! I hope you all enjoy and please don't steal my artwork~~~ thank you

[sunshinesquash]

Love that the second I saw Gwyn my brain was like:

sweet baby, must protect, pure bean, lil squishie

I'm officially part of the Dr. Gwyn Davies protection squad now, sorry :/

[keiruvieg]

req:hello ! i wanted to say that i really like your writing, keep going you’re awesome!

I was also wondering if you could write some fluff with Choso? I think he’s so underrated and he’s totally husband/boyfriend material !

Thanks for your time ✨❤️

a/n: tysm!!!! im sorry it took too long i barely had the energy to do schoolworks so yeah. SORRY IT WAS LATE WHEN I REALIZED U WANTED A FLUFF SCENARIO ILL PROB DO A SEPARATE ONE FOR THAT UNTIL THEN PLS WAIT. I ALREADY DID THE HCS AND I CANT JUST PUT IT OUT AJHDAJDHAJHDAKD

here’s my previous hc if yall are curious

WARNINGS: lol i barely edited this so yeah if yall have pet peeves for grammatical error please scroll down immediately

word count:1426

the cutest human bean in this world

HE POUTS HAVE YALL SEEN THAT

this man will cling into you on the mornings no matter what the cost

HE KNOWS HOW TO COOK(idk if i mentioned it already in my previous hc buT HE KNOWS HOW TO COOK, EVEN THOUGH ITS WEIRD SOMETIMES BUT THE TASTE IT THERE)

yall watched the “the way of househusband”? there’s a part there where Tatsu just buy the mosssssssstttt randomest things

choso will do that

he’ll buy a mixer

he’ll buy a hoola hoop

heck he’ll prob even buy you a flower crown

HE LOOKS VRY INTIMIDATING BUT HE IS SO SWEET

i love you every now and then cause why not

prob say it out loud to know that youre still there

you’re prob on the bathroom and he’ll shout i love you

pls dont say mean things to him while you’re mad he’ll overthink abt it all through out

like geto on my other ask,,,,he prob has otherwordly instinct

lol he’ll know when you’ll do smthn crazayyyyy

holding hands with him are a must

prob hold ur hand at the most randomest time

will cry if u have to go somewhere far

hE WANTS TO LEARN FROM YOU

lol just dress up with a blouse and thigh highs with a pencil skirt and messy bun with glasses

he’ll just stare at u the whole time

asking why u dressed like tht

pls he wants you to teach him everything he doesnt know

he’ll buy you hair clips too you cant change my mind with that

COFFEE DATES? COFFEE DATES.

choso aint tht kind of rich person he’ll rather stay home than go to a fancy restaurant

but choso in a suit seems fine asf-

lol he’ll walk around the house with just a sweatpants and bread with his hands

YALL KNOW THE NECKLACE WHERE U PUT BLOOD IN A BOTTLE

YEAH THE BOTH OF U MUST DO THT

u’ll see him pout if u dont

if he accidentally used it in an attack or protect himself man will be so disappointed

but he will not talk abt it tho,,,he’ll prob be so quiet abt it because he dont wanna bother you.

play chess with him and you’ll lose

you’ll prob put your half portion in his lap while you guys are on a couch and man will just rub you

he sleeps alot in his stomach

he’ll plop down the bed

LOL HE’S SO FLEXIBLE TOO

wait wait lemme just put it out with how he came up with his feelings for you

man will not do anything bout it cause he thought it was normal

he was like “no, it prob it isnt that special”

unTIL HE KEEPS FINDING UR PRESENCE

though- he wont think much abt it too

he’ll just think that ur always there thats why your absence seems different

and it kept on going too

and now he just have to ask someone where you are

unTIL SOMEONE ASKED HIM WITH

“do u like her or smthn”

man was shock

man was offended

wht was “like” anyways

someone explained it to him-

man kept thinking bout it

until he ask you abt it

like “do u like someone?”

and if u said yes-

man’s heart will throb

man knows something was up now-

he’ll prob keep it to himself the whole time

pls just ask him abt it if u notice something cause man was a lil obvious

he was getting shy when u asked him-

he’ll just confess right there and then

he’ll respect any opinions you’ll give him tho

say yes-who wouldnt want choso

and now you’re stuck with him not like you’re complaining

i know yall are thirsty(cause i am too) but i dont see choso as to someone who’s always horny

tho he’ll prob ask you something abt that foreign feeling

like i said in my previous hc- mans will use petnames on u

he’s sooooooooooooooooo caring

you sick

let him take care of everything

thats where your teaching comes in

he’ll remember anything

man got good brains

overall would 100 percent recommend this man cause why tf not he’s hot,he’s sweet,he’s caring, EVERYTHING IS IN HIM ALREADY JUST PLEASE DONT DIE 

[box-of-roses]

Tall/Small Headcannons for Oikawa, Ushijima, Tendo, The Twins, Alisa, and Sakusa

Oikawa Toru

♚ Giving you his Seijoh jacket before a game and making sure you sit closer to the team than his fangirls. (He will find a way even if you have to sit on the bench with the coach this boy will plead)

♚ Enjoys when you move your arms up and down making little flap sounds and just gives you a hug because cute

♚ Definitely persuades you into calling Iwaizumi Iwa-chan (although he’s fine with it because you’re smol and he will protect too)

♚Prepare for facetimes at like 1 A.M. when he comes up with new alien conspiracies and you jokingly saying you’re an alien and him just sitting here like “Because you’re so amazing you’re out of this world.” 

♚ Smirks because he knows when he has a good pick up line

♚ So like go on a little drabble with me for a sec-

    Turning over you smile and place your hand on this side of your boyfriend’s face rubbing small circles on his cheek while your other hand is running through the soft brown tresses. His chocolate eyes flutter open and he just leans forward a bit and nuzzles your noses together. “Good morning my King!” He blushes and kisses your forehead. Rubbing small circles on your back he pulls the blankets up a bit because you must stay warm...totally not because he doesn’t want to move from the blanket burrito and start the day. 

♚ Hot cocoa in the winter and puts little peppermint pieces in it when it gets closer to Christmas

♚ You’re cold? Have his scarf and hat, and be prepared to share his jacket with him because he’s also cold

��� Valentine’s Day? This boy uses the fourteen days leading up to it to spoil you plus Valentine’s Day itself. 

♚ Little notes in your locker telling you how pretty you are and how he just wants to pepper kisses all over your face 

♚ Prepare for him walking into your homeroom on Valentine’s day and just snuggling with you as he feeds you chocolate and then he comes back for lunch because he needs to properly spoil you

♚ If he’s little spoon expect him to just lay on top of your chest and demand you pet his hair 

♚ Protect this baby please

Ushijima Wakatoshi

♤ Honestly doesn’t give them to you unless you ask because this boy can’t comprehend why you would want to wear his jacket

♤ Little smiles if you are passed out on the couch with his Shiratorizawa jacket on 

♤ Like it’s soooo big on you, he can’t he just thinks you’re the most adorable thing

♤ Will lift your head up and place it in his lap so he can pet your hair and watch his show

♤ Will definitely take you to the park and you two play volleyball together

♤ If you call him at like 8 pm he might be asleep but this boy picks up so fast he could have fooled you

“I’m sorry love! Were you sleeping?” You ask as he shakes his head and fixes his hair a bit because he has to look good (we ignore the fact that his messy hair still make him att--enough of my simping). “Okay, I was just wondering if I could stay the night? I missed you this week…” You trail of Ushijima lets out a small chuckle and gets up unlocking the door to his house.

“Door’s open just tell me when you get here strawberry.” 

♤ Alright, fight me but being someone’s strawberry is adorable like they’re small and most people like them (and the fact that I blush really easy but that’s besides the point)

♤ Sleepovers~~

♤ You going into his closet and stealing one of his shirts 

♤ No shame just no pants because he’s tall and built sooooo yeah it’s really big on you

♤ Might blush lightly, or smile...or both depending on the sleeves

♤ Did I mention curling up on his chest and him petting your hair while he sings to you wanting you to fall asleep so he can fully appreciate you 

Tendo Satori

🍨 Sidenote- I found these ice cream emojis and they cute 🍨🍨🍨🍨🍨🍨

🍨 This boy would be so happy if you stole his hoodies like he melts

🍨 Will share ice cream sandwich with you because he thinks it’s cute to see some ice cream on like the corner of your mouth and this boy leans over no hesitation and kisses it away

🍨 He might tease you about your height but if anyone else comments on it that’s a big no no because only he can tease you about it

🍨 Honestly loves how short you are because like Oikawa if he walks in on you just like in his Shiratorizawa jacket flapping your hands up and down to make woosh sounds he melts again

🍨 Will hug you and bend down to lay his chin on your head and wrap his arms around you

Satori came home from volleyball practice to you in one of his hoodies that stopped about at your knee cooking some french toast while a tub of ice cream was off to the side. He came up behind you and rested his chin on your head arms around your stomach. “Hi sweetie.” He nuzzles his face into your hair and smiles happily at the scent of the cherry shampoo. “You used my shampoo?” 

“Mhm! I wanted to be clean and smelly good when you came home so I took a shower and decided to put on one of your hoodies because they’re just so comfy! And they smell so good!!!” He smiles and he swears he feels all of the bad things that happened in his day go away at the sight of you hugging yourself in the hoodie and a big smile on your face.

🍨Chocolate ice cream dates 

🍨 Watches horror movies because A) He likes them and B) You curl up in his lap

Miya Atsumu

◐  Will tease you about your height but honestly thinks it’s adorable 

◐ Def uses you as a head rest, like just rests his arm on your head and ‘leans’ on you (in reality he just makes it look like he’s leaning on you but is holding himself up because he can’t hurt his baby)

◐ Going to a game and wearing his spare jersey, you better believe this man is going to play better than his best because he has to show off 

◐ Osamu def tease him about showing off and would chuckle when he messes up

◐ He would try to cook for you but ultimately fail and get Osamu to cook it (then steal the credit when he gives it to you)

◐ Going back to the jersey thing- if he came over to your house to see you just lounging around in it this man would have the biggest smirk on his face

◐ So like Valentine’s day, anyone? 

◐ This boy will pout if you leave him alone because his fangirls threatened you

◐ When he figured out what happened-

Atsumu was pouting because he wanted to spend time with you but for some reason today, the day you should have wanted to spend time with your lovely boyfriend if not everyday, you had been avoiding him. He decided to go incognito mode and follow you around to see if he could find out why. Cue the Kim Possible music guys- in reality he was standing behind the corner when he found out why. 

His fangirls were standing in front of you, smol bean must protect, with their hands on their hips while you looked upwards a bit to look them in the eyes. “Stay away from Atsu today got it? We wouldn’t want to have to spread a nasty rumor now would we?” You shook your head and teared up a bit looking down at the heart-shaped box that was in your hand. 

The only thought going through this man’s head was ‘Those nasty fluffing pigs!’ did he confront them, yes, yes he did. Were they allowed at the volleyball games, hell no, they were also not allowed within 12 ft. of you.

Miya Osamu

Soft baby-

🍙This boy can and will cook for you 

🍙 Got something special going on? Prepare for a whole meal prepared by your boyfriend

🍙 Didn’t pack enough? Shares his food with you

🍙 Cold hands? He’s holding one in the pocket of his jacket and takes the glove off that hand so your other hand won’t be cold

🍙 Can’t sleep at the sleepover?

Osamu woke up from his nap, you still wrapped up in his arms but looking up at him with a growing blush on your face as you froze. He smiled and kissed your forehead when he noticed that your hands were still in hair and leaned into the touch (soft like excuse me for a second while I imagine being held please-). You smiled and kissed the tip of his nose before nuzzling your own nose against it. 

Osamu nuzzled your nose back and finally kept his eyes open. He looked over noticing his neanderthal of a brother asleep on the bed on the other half of the room. “What are you doing still up?” He asked tucking a small piece of hair behind your ear. “You should be asleep my sweet.” 

“Couldn’t sleep, plus I like looking at your pretty face!” You say happily giving Osamu a small smile and kissing his cheek taking one of the hands that was playing with his hair and tracing the soft features of his face.

“I’ll make you some tea then we can go back to sleep how about that?” You nodded your head and slowly got up ‘your’ shirt sliding off your left shoulder. Osamu fixed it as you went to the kitchen and he wrapped his arms around you while you waited for the kettle to go off.

🍙 Forehead kisses- that’s all that needs to be said

🍙 Did I mention clinging to him like a koala makes him happy?

🍙Like just wrap your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist while he’s sitting and don’t let go when he gets up

🍙 Warm- like this boy is so warm and it’s nice for cuddles

🍙Did I mention he’s big spoon?

🍙 If he had to deal with Atsumu and they got into a fight about -certain subjects that relate to the future that have not been discussed in the nike thus far- >-< 

🍙But if he had a fight with Tsumu this boy is just going to go ‘flop’ and rest his head on your chest and demand you play with his hair

🍙 Makes you hot cocoa if it’s winter and put a cinnamon stick in it with whip cream you know he gots that fancy touch 

Kuroo Tetsurou

😼 Sly baby

😼 Teases you for being short but if anyone comments on it they about to catch these hands-

😼 Must be friends with Kenma, I’m sorry but you have to (to be fair who wouldn’t want to be friends with Kenma the apple pie baby)

😼 If you are friends with Yaku he a lil cautious that his teasing you for being small will result in being kicked but he doesn’t show it

😼 If you come to his practices but are sleepy you can sleep on the bleachers using his jacket as a blanket-

😼 Tears up because you can fit all of you under it and still have extra and he’s just sitting here like- how tf are you so cute

😼 Mayhaps he gets jealous when you make apple pie for Kenma but don’t make food for him-

😼 Will get jealous if you wear anyone else’s jacket like he only likes seeing you in his jackets

😼 Conflicted about it though because you still cute and small

Kuroo was happy because it was Valentine’s Day and he was fully prepared to spoil you. He filled your locker with chocolate and little love notes and walked you to school, he gave you his Nekoma jacket and obviously you proudly wore it the whole day. You were a happy bean the whole day and he even made a bento for you and filled it with little sticky notes that had cheesy pickup lines and cat drawings. “Tetsu! I feel bad that I haven’t been spoiling you!” You say pouting a bit as he chuckles and kisses the tip of your nose. 

“You can spoil me tomorrow if you really want to, but today is for you, although you spoil me every day.” He smiles at you and gives you a hug.

😼 Loves giving you kisses, will kiss your forehead, cheek, lips, the tip of your nose, just all over your face honestly

😼 His favorite place to kiss is your shoulder or neck, I can’t explain but that’s how it is 

😼 Definitely calls you his kitten and you can’t convince me otherwise

Alisa Haiba

🍣 Will pick you up and spin you around when she sees you

🍣 Bends down a little bit to make it easier on your neck (And easier to give you a kiss if she’s already in position)

🍣 Always takes you on like really cute dates

🍣 Like, ice cream parlor, stargazing, drive in, roller skating, stuff like that

🍣 Forehead kisses, cheek kisses, and just snuggles all the time

🍣 You want to wear one of her cardigans? Go right ahead she will be so happy 

🍣Steal one of her hoodies? Baby will tear up 

🍣 Honestly just precious interaction

“Y/N!!!!” Alisa cheered as she ran to you with her arms out and a huge smile on her face. “Are you ready for our date?” 

“Not yet!” You gave her a big hug and lifted your head to give her a big cheery smile. “I have to get one more thing then I’ll be back!” You rushed back into your room and quickly put on ‘their’ blue cat hoodie. You smiled and dashed out back to Alisa who smiled and blushed lightly. “Ready?” You ask, taking her hand as she smiled softly and kissed your forehead. 

“You look amazing kitty.” She ruffled your hair with her free hand and kissed the back of your hand before lacing both of your hands together. And heading out the door two pairs of skates thrown over her shoulder because she didn’t want you to carry them. She low key wanted to carry you too but knew that you would rather walk (at least the way there). 

“Ready to skate with me Alisa?” Alisa nodded and patted your head with her other hand, she opened the car door letting you get in. Giggling a little bit you said a little thank you shaking your head at the antics of the eldest Haiba. She walked over to the driver side of the car, setting the skates on the floor behind the driver’s seat, you began driving to the roller rink one of her hands on the steering wheel and the other holding your hand which she would bring up to her lips and kiss it.

Sakusa Kiyoomi

😷 Sakusa might not be the most loving boyfriend but he shows it in other ways

😷 He gives a mask before school starts so you don’t ‘get infected by other people’s germs’

😷 When you ask about you touching him he just looks at you with a surprised pikachu face

😷 Sakusa says that you don’t have germs because you’re you

😷 You can give him hugs just don’t do it as often in front of his team because they will tease him

😷 If you both go to the All Japan training camp he will **not** let Atsumu near you

😷 If he tries it- 

Atsumu knew you were dating Sakusa and likes to tease him so we all see where this is going.  He came up to you when you and your ‘team’ were done with regular training. As you were about to put on a face mask and take a shower but Atsumu put his hand on your lips preventing you from doing so. “My, my, your lips are soft.” You blushed a little bit and he took his hand away. 

Sakusa was on his way towards you when he saw you blushing and Atsumu standing in front of you, closer than he wanted, and started walking faster. “Say, I wonder if they would feel nice against mine?” When he put your hand on his lips Sakusa lost it and pulled out his trusty can of Lysol, he appeared behind you and sprayed Atsumu huffing a bit from jealousy. 

“Come on (Y/N), you don’t need to be around him. You can shower at my room and steal my shirt to sleep in, I don’t want you out of my sight for the rest of the day.” Sakusa’s cheeks puffed out a bit as he wiped your hand with a baby wipe and then pulled you towards his room a smirking Atsumu left in his wake. _____________________________ My Requests are open! So If you have a request go ahead and send it in!!! (I only write for Haikyuu right now btw)

[zu-is-here]

Honestly when I saw a notification you reblogged it, I smiled so real hard closed the video I was watching and directly went to see it :D So thanks! Your reactions are what 's always such a delight (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀)

I'm putting the screenshot there to talk about your tags ^w^

Waaaa thanks (｡ﾉω＼｡) that's quite the compliment you're giving me there ⁄(⁄ ⁄^⁄-⁄^⁄ ⁄)⁄

Mu's indeed a bean :). She's a courageous lil' girl who never had quite a normal life. She will probably grow to be an amazing person (and once I get motivation to work on her future-self design maybe she'll have more stories maybe funfact: she's bi)

(I missed the occasion to make it a joke against Cross I guess XD. Well I chose that name the same way than Mimosa. It's a star from the southern cross! 🌟 In the story, Mimosa got his name quite randomly after Cross and Dream fought over it (welp Mimosa Blade Screwdriver isn't the prettiest name X'D). For Mu, they thought a lot. They used a list where they each wrote names (it was in "a little thing changing everything" I think). Cross read with Mimosa a book about stars and find out Mimosa was a star and added a few star names on the list. Mu was the only one Dream didn't erase. Mimosa saw the list after and recognized the word "mu" as one of the stars name in the book and drew a lil' star next to it. The "Maple Miracle" in her full name "Mu Maple Miracle" was mostly because cuteness for my part. I'd say for Dream and Cross "Maple" was for cute points and "miracle" because even after the chaos of her birth she was still her lil' miracle 😜

You have no idea how long I thought about how she would draw a waffle. After 5 minutes I just went with geometrical mess. Honestly I felt proud of her writing it XD Good girl

Well there was no way "the creator" wouldn't be one of the first to join the fight and therefore to fall ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I thought about so much characters to referenced to but he was the first I thought of

Yup Lint recognized it... Funfact at first I wanted the story to end after the kids going through the battlefield once again but with a better understanding to the situation Mimosa would have found the crown of Dream like Mu did when she finds Fancy (in "I just wanted to nap"). But it was too much of a heartache he would have break... So nobody went to see the shiny thing.

I absolutly love describing this kind of places from a child point of view. It makes everything more intense despite not talking about it at all. These kids are dancing in a graveyard and you can't stop them-

Mimosa will forever be a baby must protect

Mu is the enigma of a mute child making more noise than a talking one :3

Welp the news weren't that good indeed but not all bad in a way

Thank you so much again 🥺

Writing about it makes me want to write more angst. Some deep feelings or messy chaos mmmm. Too much fluff recently- I have some angst potential with a few ocs of mine but I'm not completly sure if I should or not XD

Anyway the dark cream sibs have earned the right to rest in fluffland for a while. I'll be torturing some others.

End of the rambling~

Have a good day Zuz~

Awww I'm really glad to hear it Blue! (〃ω〃) You did such an amazing work you deserve much more ♡

She's such an unique girl indeed ☆ *GASP* (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵) Too sweet! It was so thoughtful of you with the names <3

And that scene turned out the best way! So realistic like any child would do (ówò) The real life is such a good reference though sometimes we forget about such simple little things but you nailed it *^* It's just that Ink is a really specific special character to work on so that was worth it ☆

OH my god!! (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀) That would break their hearts... but the version you chose is great, I love the scene where Mimosa realizes it's about his parents, with Fancy telling they loved him... ♡

Bullseye ★ You know I'm always looking forward to more of your writings, whether angst or not, — the way you write never ceases to amaze me ♡

Have a nice day and night too!╰(*´︶`*)╯

[no-dream-girl]

Posting my deceased cat lady because I love her so so so so so much and am still healing from the pain her passing left in my heart after one and a half year.

Im so sorry that I wasnt able to check up on you the way you deserved it on your last few weeks here w us because of my mental health issues.

Im so sorry and I feel sick whenever I think about the pain you must have gone through and Im blaming myself all the time that I couldnt have done better.

Im so sorry I wasnt able to hold you in my arms when you passed as I always wished I could do.

Im so sorry that you had to go through all this pain.

Sometimes I wake up at night and cant breath because the pain of losing you sits heavily on my chest as I remember your last moments.

In the beginning I felt a sense of incredulity that I was able to get over your death so rapidly. But as time went by I realized my mind and body just numbed myself to protect myself. I miss you so badly I never missed anyone that much.

Your fluffy and cozy fur and the way you purred when I'd scratch up and down your spine.

Your sweet ears and adorable snout that I loved to kiss.

Your dumb lil paws.

The way you reacted when you were outside in the snow for the first time.

The way you would hunt for the dogs that sometimes my moms friends came with to us.

The way you'd watch me take a bath and would want to drink the water out of it which I would have to hold you back from.

The way you'd hunt for my feet whenever I went to bed.

The way you'd wake me up. If Id lay on my chest you'd walk up my back and sit there purring and trying to eat my hair. If Id lay on my back you'd walk up my chest, kneading my boobs, getting your nails caught in them sometimes.

The way you would run to the balcony when you heard it being opened to chill outside and watch the world do its things.

The way you'd chirp on birds outside the windows. You were so excited, I loved it!

The way you'd like to carefully walk out to the hallway on the stairs and check out the space when a visitor was about to take the elevator up as we waited at the door for them.

Once you got lost in the hallway and confused our apartment with our neighbour ones that lives above us. We thought you were missing but on the next day the neighbour told us you hid underneath her bath tube 😰 lil scared bean ❤️

There are so many other memories...That I will hold deeply in my heart. From the first moment I saw your head looking out of my father's sleeve, looking at you from my bunk bed when I went to sleep the first night and you were down there, so smol, looking up to me, not being able to go up there as I was too excited to wake up the next day to be able to spend time with you. To the moment where you realized that you ass got to big for you to fit underneath my moms bed 😂

But as I pass our memories will dissolve forever. It wont matter anymore I guess.

❤️Ily❤️

[0gasstationcoffee]

LWA rewatch episode 19

·      OH NO IT STARTS OFF IMMEDIATELY WITH A FLASHBACK TO YOUNG DIANA AND HER MOM

·      Look at this lil precious bean, protect her

·      Beatrix: the first witch of the Cavendish family

·      One of the Nine Old Witches

·      Oh that’s the tapestry that appears later in the episode

·      “An old tradition and a new power will cross to open a door to the unseen world”

·      Does this flashback take place before or after the infamous Shiny Chariot show?

·      So her mother’s words is what makes Diana’s decision for her

·      Damn Akko go eat something, your stomach does not sound happy

·      Akko is a good person with a good heart, after everything H&B have done to her she STILL goes to check on them when they’re crying

·      Diana’s dropping out of Luna Nova

·      Is she just allowed to do that on her own? Or I guess she’s of age to make that choice

·      “The ceremony to elect the head of the family only happens every few years”

·      Magic is weird yall

·      “She’s leaving tonight at midnight” DIANA THAT’S A TOUCH DRAMATIC

·      Awwww Akko running up to Ursula to tell her the news

·      Ursula is such a mom with how gently she’s talking to Akko about this whole Diana situation

·      I love how hellbent Akko is on getting Diana to stay. She knows how much Diana loves magic too

·      Lotte just petting that adorable fairy is too cute

·      Omg Lotte pulled away her hand and the fairy just wiggled their arms at her and she continued petting

·      Lotte and Sucy waiting for Akko and she just bolts past their room lmao

·      LMAO SHE RAN PAST THEM AGAIN

·      Wait so Diana is leaving now??? I didn’t realize that the episode started off at basically 11 pm.

·      So Akko was heading to the cafeteria for food at 11 PM and ran into H&B, Ursula was walking around Luna Nova (yet another reason I HC her as having trouble sleeping, and Lotte and Sucy were waiting up for Akko

·      Aw poor Diana : ( she looks so sad

·      I know I don’t talk about Diana too much in these reviews, it’s not on purpose but I am mainly focusing on Akko and Chariot because the whole purpose for this rewatch is to finally write my story where Akko and Chariot’s relationship is the focus

·      “Those who leave Luna Nova are to do so undetected.” FOR WHAT FUCKING PURPOSE LUNA NOVA SERIOUSLY WHATS THE POINT OF THAT HOW STUPID

·      Oof Akko mentioning Diana’s parents should be the one to hold down the fort until Diana graduates. She really doesn’t know

·      I guess that makes sense, she and Diana aren’t really friends at this point so it’s not like Akko would know her history.

·      Akko: I don’t care about tradition! Damn right girl screw tradition

·      “I have never for a moment thought of you as my rival.” I don’t know why but Diana’s delivery of that is so funny

·      Akko obviously wanted to go to Luna Nova because that’s where Chariot went. I know Luna Nova was Diana’s family school anyhow but she still must have loved that Chariot went there too

·      Oh literally it was Akko’s next line

·      “I wanted more than anything to go to the same school that Chariot went to. But now it’s much more than that. The things I’ve experienced here, the people I’ve met, they’ve all become so important to me. I love them all, just as much as I love Chariot.”

·      This line with all of Akko’s memories in the background omg how sweet

·      Akko you sweetheart

·      And also wow look at how much she’s grown!!!!!!!

·      Akko went to Luna Nova for Chariot but she’s staying there for herself

·      Diana: why don’t you go back to looking for the seven words? Akko: Kill Bill sirens

·      Akko just wants to make people happy with magic, Diana wants to bring back honor to the world of magic

·      Literally just Chariot and Croix 10-12 years later

·      Diana just called it the Shiny Rod, not it’s real name

·      Is that the Shiny Chariot fangirl in her?

·      Aw she really is gonna miss Luna Nova

·      Sucy and Lotte just peeking out from the tower after watching their conversation lmao

·      Awwww Ursula watching her fly away from her tower

·      AKKO JUST SHOWING UP AT ANY HOUR SHE WANTS BECAUSE SHE KNOWS SHE CAN IS TOO CUTE

·      URSULA DOESN’T EVEN QUESTION IT

·      That’s such a mom thing. Ursula just looks at Akko’s big watery eyes and gives her what she wants

·      Ursula didn’t even fight it she just told Akko where to find Diana

·      The red team continues to be the best team

·      They are so supportive of Akko, even Sucy!

·      Sucy: be careful. WOW

·      Ooh the Cavendish’s have their own Sorcerer’s Stone

·      If that’s the case then why didn’t Diana just fly there??? Why was that creepy boat ride necessary

·      Anna talking about Luna Nova: “I know it had been your dream to-“ She gets cut off but was she going to mention the same thing about Shiny Chariot?

·      The fucking snakes man

·      I know snakes were/are associated with medicine but still wtf

·      Goddamn the Cavendish manor looks bad

·      Aunt Daryl, here’s this bitch

·      I still think of that video where someone put all the LWA characters on different vines and Diana and Daryl got the “What the hell are you doing” “I’m doing my eyebrows” “That’s a big ass mirror” “I have big ass eyebrows”

·      That one makes me laugh so hard

·      BUT

·      THAT ONE IS RIGHT BEFORE MY ABSOLUTELY FAVORITE LWA VINE WITH CHARIOT AND AKKO RECREATING THE ICONIC B99 SCENE WITH CHARIOT GOING “I’VE ONLY HAVE AKKO FOR A DAY AND A HALF BUT IF ANYTHING HAPPENED TO HER I WOULD KILL EVERYONE IN THIS ROOM AND THEN MYSELF” AND THEN HOLBROOK OR SOMEONE IN THE BACK “THAT’S A VERY VIOLENT EULOGY I LIKE IT”

·      Three guesses why that’s my favorite vine

·      Back to our regularly scheduled programming

·      This is a weird aunt/niece relationship lmao

·      Did Daryl’s eyes just really glow red and she faded away? Is that normal? Diana’s lack of reaction makes it seem normal

·      Oh no poor Akko, trying to walk to the Cavendish manor

·      “I’m really hungry” Oh shit did Akko not get any food from the night before??

·      TIME TO HITCHHIKE

·      SHE HAD THE SIGN READY TO GO LMAO

·      Oh shit it’s Andrew

·      I forgot he was in this episode, next one too

·      Why does Akko look so much smaller when she’s the same age as Diana and Andrew

·      Andrew just trying to shut his dad up when he keeps talking about Akko

·      Oh right Andrew and Diana are relatives, is that why they’re so damn similar

·      Not even 12 hours later and Diana is riding horses with her dogs lol

·      I like that Akko always introduces herself by her full name

·      Diana about Akko and Andrew: And why are the two of you together in the first place?

·      Andrew’s such a little shit, just grinning

·      Lmao Andrew waves and says “see ya” when being taken to his room, I don’t know why that made me laugh

·      Okay so all traditional witches are assholes basically

·      Hell yeah Diana! Stepping in to defend Akko from her awful relatives

·      How was Diana’s mom so nice but her aunt so awful

·      Lmao poor Akko, fitting into Diana’s dress from 5 years ago

·      It does make her look like a little kid

·      Aw of course Diana still has her childhood bear

·      Akko pointing out the bear and Diana freaking out thinking she’s looking at the box with her Chariot card in it

·      OH WE ACTUALLY SEE THE CARD, I DIDN’T REMEMBER THAT

·      I mean obviously we saw just a brief shot of young Diana at the Shiny Chariot show but is this the first time since then that shows Diana is a fan?

·      Lmao Anna just lamenting having to take care of Akko and Akko deadpans “I get it you don’t want to do this.”

·      If kindness is supposed to be a staple of the Cavendish family then what the fuck is wrong with Daryl and her two spawns

·      Ah Akko finding out that Diana lost both her parents when she was young and feeling bad about what she said before

·      LMAO Anna backing Akko into a corner and yelling is giving me flashbacks of Finneran doing that to Chariot in the beginning of the series. Akko even has the same hand gestures as Chariot

·      Well at least Akko can finally eat something

·      Oof this is awkward

·      Oh she’s trying to sell the tapestry, Diana’s gonna snap

·      Akko finding out Diana’s a descendent from one of the nine old witches lol

·      Oh god Akko is in the middle of this fight

·      AND the ceremony is tonight, damn

[withthingsunreal]

hey guys

did y’all know there’s a limit to how many links you can have in a post

adventure time masterpost part one

♥=my favourites Ω=significant plot (though sometimes this is not immediately obvious) ♪=a song happens ♫=a personal fave song happens ¿=just don’t try to think about it too hard okay

SEASON SIX

Ω 6x01/6x02 - Wake Up/Escape from the Citadel [WATCH] - Finn and Jake need to get to the Citadel, and Prismo agrees to help. But the Lich beats them to it, and it seems he's got some plans of his own.

♥ 6x03- James II [WATCH] - An excess of James.

6x04- The Tower [WATCH] [alt]- Finn's missing his arm, so he decides to build a tower into space so he can punch his dad and steal HIS arm instead. Solid plan, right?

¿ 6x05 - Sad Face [WATCH] - A circus, and a clown.

♪ 6x06 - Breezy [WATCH] - Finn's flower isn't doing so well, and Finn himself isn't feeling anything, but his new bee friend Breezy wants to help. Stay tuned for spook (me, that's me) starting a petition to retitle this show 'what the hell did I just watch.'

¿ 6x07 - Food Chain [WATCH] - Finn and Jake learn about the food chain by, um, living it.

6x08- Furniture & Meat [WATCH] - Mo' treasure, mo' problems.

6x09 - The Prince Who Wanted Everything [WATCH] - LSPrincess has a story to share with the Ice King, and LSPrince has a lesson to learn from Fionna the Human.

6x10 - Something Big [WATCH] - Something something Maja something Ancient Psychic Tandem War Elephant something something feelings?? Listen I don't know what I'm watching anymore ok

♪ 6x11 - Little Brother [WATCH] - Shelby has an accident, ends up with a little brother, and turns to Jake for brotherly advice. Well, giving Finn a sword worked out pretty well...

6x12 - Ocarina [WATCH] - Kim Kil Whan buys the treehouse and tries to teach Jake a lesson about responsibility. It goes suuuper well.

6x13 - Thanks for the Crabapples, Giuseppe [WATCH] - Ice King and his fellow offbeats go on a wizard road trip to form their own secret society.

6x14- Princess Day [WATCH] - Breakfast Princess gets rude with LSP. Mistake! Time for her and Marceline to mess up the Breakfast Kingdom way bad.

6x15 - Nemesis [WATCH] - There's a great evil in the Candy Kingdom which must be stopped.

6x16 - Joshua and Margaret Investigations [WATCH] - Finn and Jake's parents fought monsters, too! Even when their mom was way super about-to-pop pregnant, apparently.

6x17 - Ghost Fly [WATCH] - Jake kills a fly, because flies are disgusting. But ghost flies seem to be worse. Oops?

6x18 - Everything's Jake [WATCH] - Bender searches inside himself and finds that Fry has been with him all along Jake goes on an inner journey, but like, literally. not really spiritually so much.

♥ 6x19 - Is That You? [WATCH] - Jake and Finn mourn Prismo, and then things get super bananas up in their dreamspace.

6x20 - Jake the Brick [WATCH] - Jake observes nature as he spends some time as just another brick in the wall.

6x21 - Dentist [WATCH] - Finn's tooth is in real bad shape, and he has to face facts: it is time for him to Go Dentist.

6x22 - The Cooler [WATCH] - There's a crisis in the Flame Kingdom, and FP makes the (objectively terrible??) decision to turn to PB for help.

6x23 - Pajama Wars [WATCH] - Sleepover in the Candy Kingdom! Nothing terrible is happening.

Ω 6x24 - Evergreen [WATCH] - Master Evergreen and his lizardy minion Gunther attempt to save the world.

¿Ω 6x25 - Astral Plane [WATCH] - Finn goes on an astral adventure, and sees some junk that may be relevant soon.

6x26 - Gold Stars [WATCH] - Sweet P starts school, and makes some new (terrible) friends.

6x27 - The Visitor [WATCH] - Finn follows his dream from Astral Plane and finds his least favourite massive disappointment at the end of the trail.

6x28 - The Mountain [WATCH] - It’s a Lemongrab episode. I don’t know anymore.

6x29 - Dark Purple [WATCH] - Susan Strong and some brave hyoomans on a rescue mission.

6x30 - The Diary [WATCH] - Fandom can be a consuming thing. TV finds an old diary and gets a little too into it.

6x31 - Walnuts & Rain [WATCH] - Finn and Jake get separated and go on different (weird) journeys.

6x32 - Friends Forever [WATCH] - Ice King tries to make himself some new friends. It goes terribly.

6x33 - Jermaine [WATCH] - After Jake has a shared dream with Jermaine, the boys go to visit their brother, who’s still living in their childhood home.

6x34 - Chips and Ice Cream [WATCH] - Chips, chips chips chips. Ice cream ice cream. (A travelling performer passes his curse on to Jake. It doesn’t go well.)

6x35 - Graybles 1000+ [WATCH] - Graybles, again, some more. Apparently the Candy Kingdom is still around however much further in the future, and someone’s still putting up string lights at Marceline’s. So there’s that.

6x36 - Hoots [WATCH] - The Cosmic Owl gets distracted by a mystery lady’s pretty set of tailfeathers.

6x37 - Water Park Prank [WATCH] - Finn and Jake (and the Ice King) spend the day at the water park.

6x38 - You Forgot Your Floaties [WATCH] - Magic Man, up to his usual biz, but this time he’s getting a helping hand from Betty. No way this will go horribly wrong??

6x39 - Be Sweet [WATCH] - For some inexplicable reason, Tree Trunks thinks LSP is a good choice for a babysitter. Yikes.

6x40 - Orgalorg [WATCH] - Gunther and the Gunts throw a houseparty.

6x41 - On the Lam [WATCH] - Martin finds another group of adorable creatures to try to exploit. yay.

6x42/6x43 - Hot Diggity Doom/The Comet [WATCH] - An election in the Candy Kingdom, and an impending catastrophe.

SEASON SEVEN

7x01 - Bonnie & Neddy [WATCH] - The King of Ooo continues his efforts to be the worst. PB has to help someone important to her get back to where he belongs.

7x02 - Varmints [WATCH] - Bubblegum tries to protect her pumpkin patch; Marceline lends a hand.

7x03 - Cherry Cream Soda [WATCH] - A candy citizen comes back from the dead, causing some complications for those he’d left behind.

7x04 - Mama Said [WATCH] - While out on a mission for the King of Ooo, Finn and Jake run into Billy’s ex-gf Canyon and decide to help her out instead.

7x05 - Football [WATCH] - BMO tries to do something nice for a friend. It does not go well.

7x06/7x07 - Stakes: Marceline the Vampire Queen/Everything Stays [WATCH] - Marceline has a favour to ask of PB, which results in her reflecting on the last thousand years of her life.

7x08 - Stakes: Vamps About [WATCH] - Marceline’s old nemeses are back, and she’s absolutely down to take ‘em all on again.

7x09 - Stakes: The Empress Eyes [WATCH] - Targeting the Ice King? Possibly not the greatest plan a vampire could have.

7x10 - Stakes: May I Come In [WATCH] - Jake finds his courage.

7x11 - Stakes: Take Her Back [WATCH] - Marceline’s out of commission, so it’s up to Finn and Jake to take on The Moon.

7x12 - Stakes: Checkmate [WATCH] - Four down, one to go.

♫ 7x13 - Stakes: The Dark Cloud [WATCH] - Marceline has to decide what she’s fighting for.

7x14/7x15 - The More You Moe/The Moe You Know [WATCH (watermarked)] - It's BMO's birthday, and a special guest is coming with a special mission for our lil robot buddy. yay?

7x16 - Summer Showers [WATCH] - Viola helps LSP put on a play, and Jake is super proud.

7x17 - Angel Eyes [WATCH] - BMO bribes Finn and Jake into playing cowboys and bandits.

7x18 - President Porpoise Is Missing! [WATCH] - An undersea authority figure appears to have vanished.

7x19 - Blank-Eyed Girl [WATCH] - Urban legends may or may not be baloney, and may or may not be out to get you.

7x20 - Bad Jubies [WATCH] - One heck of a storm brewing up some real nasty vibes.

7x21 - King's Ransom [WATCH] - Ice King isn't going to let anything stop him from rescuing his best bud, and Finn and Jake have got his back.

7x22 - Scamps [WATCH] - Finn rehabilitates some bad seeds.

7x23 - Crossover [WATCH] - Prismo needs Finn and Jake’s help with a junked-up timeline.

7x24 - The Hall of Egress [WATCH] - A dungeon keeps hitting the reset button every time Finn tries to exit.

7x25 - Flute Spell [WATCH] - Does Finn have a new girl in his life, or is he working on a different sort of magic?

7x26 - The Thin Yellow Line [WATCH] - It Is Okay To Be You, ft. The Banana Guards

7x27 - Broke His Crown [WATCH] - Bonnie and Marcie try to have a dinner date with the IK, but his crown is up to some weird biz.

7x28 - Don’t Look [WATCH] - Finn fails to follow the literal only instruction given.

7x29 - Beyond the Grotto [WATCH] - Sea lard rescue 911

7x30 - Lady Rainicorn of the Crystal Dimension [WATCH] - TV finds a weird box.

7x31 - I Am A Sword [WATCH] - FinnSword gets straight up hijacked.

7x32 - Bun Bun [WATCH] - Remember how Cinnamon Bun used to be... just, like, generally bad? at doing things? okay that but smaller.

7x33 - Normal Man [WATCH] - Normal Man needs some hero help to return Glob to Mars.

7x34 - Elemental [WATCH] - An... ice... princess? kinda??

7x35 - Five Short Tables [WATCH] - Fionna and Cake try to make some artsy-ass flapjacks.

7x36 - The Music Hole [WATCH] - Music happens, some of it on a stage.

7x37 - Daddy-Daughter Card Wars [WATCH] - Charlie helps her Papa work through some card-related stuff.

Ω 7x38/7x39 - Preboot/Reboot [WATCH] - Finn, Jake, and Susan visit a very scientific establishment.

SEASON EIGHT

8x01 - Two Swords [WATCH] - So when a FinnSword and a Grass Sword meet... sometimes some stuff can go the hell down.

8x02 - Do No Harm [WATCH] - Finn and Grass Finn try stuff out.

8x03 - Wheels [WATCH] - Jake tries to connect with his granddaughter by proving he’s cool.

8x04 - High Strangeness [WATCH] - Tree Trunks loves... revolution (｡•`_´•｡)

8x05 - Horse and Ball [WATCH] - James Baxter rides again.

8x06 - Jelly Beans Have Power [WATCH] - PB tries to get a handle on the elemental powers thing.

Ω 8x07 - Islands: The Invitation [WATCH] - Susan sent out a distress signal, and a response has arrived.

8x08 - Islands: Whipple the Happy Dragon [WATCH] - Hazardous seas, or Here There Be Dragons.

Ω 8x09 - Islands: Mysterious Island [WATCH] - Finn gets separated from his friends, but makes a new one.

Ω 8x10 - Islands: Imaginary Resources [WATCH] - BMO helps Finn and Jake get acquainted with the triumphs and defeats, the epic highs and lows of virtual reality gaming.

Ω♪ 8x11 - Islands: Hide and Seek [WATCH] - Memories of island life.

Ω 8x12 - Islands: Min & Marty [WATCH] - Minerva Campbell and Martin Mertens get to know each other.

Ω 8x13 - Islands: Helpers [WATCH] - Finn meets his mom.

Ω 8x14 - Islands: The Light Cloud [WATCH] - The conflicting desires to protect your child while also allowing them to grow and thrive.

SEASON NINE

9x01 - Orb [WATCH] - Some very normal dreamscapes on the return journey to Ooo.

9x02 - Elements: Skyhooks [WATCH] - The boys make it home but things are looking... different.

9x03 - Elements: Bespoken For [WATCH] - The Ice King has a story to tell about a hot date he had, and also tangentially the current state of things.

9x04 - Elements: Winter Light [WATCH] - A visit to the Ice Kingdom.

9x05 - Elements: Cloudy [WATCH] - Finn needs to calm down, and Jake needs to potty.

9x06 - Elements: Slime Central [WATCH] - It's Slime Time baybee

9x07 - Elements: Happy Warrior [WATCH] - A normal one in the Flame Kingdom.

9x08 - Elements: Hero Heart [WATCH] - LSP tries to help Finn listen to his hero heart, while PB just wants everyone to be a little bit sweeter.

9x09 - Elements: Skyhooks II [WATCH] - Let's Get Lumpy.

9x10 - Abstract [WATCH] - Jake is wary of some changes in Jermaine.

9x11 - Ketchup [WATCH] - Marceline and BMO catch up on recent events.

9x12 - Fionna and Cake and Fionna [WATCH] - Ice King gets to hang with the REAL Fionna.

9x13 - Whispers [WATCH] - Finn and Fern help Sweet Pea with some nightmares.

9x14 - Three Buckets [WATCH] - Finn and Fern spend some uhhh quality time together

SEASON TEN

10x01 - The Wild Hunt [WATCH] - Huntress Wizard needs some assistance, and Finn has some junk to work through.

10x02 - Always BMO Closing [WATCH] - BMO and Ice King team up to become a door-to-door salesman.

10x03 - Son of Rap Bear [WATCH] - FP needs to work on her rap game.

10x04 - Bonnibel Bubblegum [WATCH] - Family junk is complicated.

10x05 - Seventeen [WATCH] - It’s Finn’s birthday! Let’s get Arthurian up in here.

10x06 - Ring of Fire [WATCH] - The marvelous misadventures of Tree Trunks.

10x07 - Marcy + Hunson [WATCH] - Marceline’s dad is in town and totally embarrassing her again.

10x08 - The First Investigation [WATCH] - Finn and Jake look into some haunted happenings at Joshua and Margaret Investigations

10x09 - Blenanas [WATCH] - Finn wants the highest possible authority to weigh in on whether or not he is funny.

10x10 - Jake the Starchild [WATCH] - Jake’s gotta save the world. No, a different one.

10x11 - Temple of Mars [WATCH] - Jermaine and Finn gotta rescue Jake, and in the process maybe help Betty work through some things.

10x12 - Gumbaldia [WATCH] - Peace talks.

♥Ω♫ 10x13 - Come Along With Me [WATCH] - Everything stays, but it still changes.

[thelastspeecher]

Pirate AU - Ford Gets What He Wanted

So, the other day, I got an ask about what Ford is up to in the Pirate AU.  Essentially, he accidentally became a pirate hunter, captaining his own ship, the Orion.  His main target: the Pirate King, as he believed that Stan had been kidnapped by the Pirate King (aka Captain Sully aka Captain Sally aka Angie McGucket).  In actuality, Stan joined the pirate crew of his own volition, and even started up a relationship with Captain Sully Captain Sally Angie.

And this...is what happens when Ford finds all that out, after he finally catches up to the Pirate King.

——————————————————————————————

              Ford marched past the pirates that were already tied up by his crew, heading straight for the captain’s quarters.  He was filled with triumph at finally catching up to the Pirate King, Captain Sully, the man who had taken his brother hostage, forcing him to work on his ship.  The moment he tore open the door, however, his eyes widened.

              He had expected to see Sully bound and gagged on the floor, Stan beaming at his rescuers.  Instead, a woman lay on the captain’s bed, surrounded by soiled blankets, two infants in her arms.  Stan stood in front of her protectively, glaring at Ford’s men.

              “Stanley!” Ford said happily, moving towards his brother. Stan let out a low snarl.  Ford didn’t see the left hook coming.

              “Get off me, you fucking bastards,” Stan snapped as Ford lay on the floor of the cabin, reeling.  Ford rubbed his cheek.  No doubt it would bruise.  He got to his feet.  The men were already subduing Stan.

              “Stanley, what the hell was that for?” Ford demanded. Stan tried to break free from the men holding him back.

              “My wife just gave birth, dumbass,” Stan spat. “And you swarmed the goddamn ship.” Ford’s jaw dropped.

              “Your…”  Ford looked at the woman on the bed.  A fierce fire sparkled in her blue eyes.  She held her infants close to her chest, but Ford could see one had the distinctive Pines nose.  “What- the last thing I heard, you were in a relationship with Captain Sully,” Ford said weakly.  “Where is he?”

              “You’d be hard-pressed to find Sully,” the woman said, baring her teeth.  She tugged down the collar of her shirt, revealing a long, jagged scar on her neck. Ford’s heart stopped.  “He doesn’t really exist.”

              “I- you-” Ford stammered.

              “I stopped going by Sully ages ago and started using my actual name, Sally.  Why are you so behind the times?”

              “I…”  Ford stared at the floor.  His mind stuttered.  “Captain Sully is a woman?  And your wife, Stan?”

              “Yes,” Stan growled.  Ford swallowed.

              “Take him to the brig,” he commanded.  Stan’s eyes widened.  “And take the Pirate King to- to-”  Ford looked at Captain Sully- Sally.  She was shaking, despite her vicious demeanor.

              Presumably from blood loss.  Many of the blankets packed around her were drenched in red.  Captain Sally met Ford’s eyes.  Exhaustion had replaced her anger.  Ford caved. I can’t send a post-partum woman to the brig.

              “Take the Pirate King to the infirmary,” Ford said softly.  He didn’t miss the way Stan slumped slightly in relief.

              “And the babies?” asked one of the crewmen. Ford winced.

              “I suppose they can stay in my cabin while their mother recuperates.”  He held his breath, ready for Captain Sally to scream at him.  No such thing happened.  He looked at the Pirate King again.  She’d passed out.  “Get her to a doctor right away,” Ford snapped.  “And…”  He swallowed. “Bring the infants to my cabin once they have been checked over.”

              “Yes, captain,” murmured one of the crewmen. Ford turned on his heel and stormed out of the cabin, trying to quiet the panicked shouting in his head.

-----

              There was a timid knock at the door.

              “Come in,” Ford said tiredly.  The door opened, revealing his beloved first mate, Fiddleford McGucket.  Ford let out a long sigh.

              “That bad, huh?” Fiddleford asked.  Ford put his head in his hands.

              “You have no idea,” he groaned.  “I’m so glad you’re here.”  As the only known man to have survived a duel with the Pirate King, Fiddleford was moved from his ship to Ford’s.  Ford’s ship had the specific goal of tracking down pirates, after all. Fiddleford had taken a slight demotion from captain to first mate as a result, but never complained about it.

              Ford would be lost without him.

              “I was interrogatin’ the pirate crew, I don’t know what happened in the captain’s…cabin…”  Fiddleford trailed off, staring at the infants sleeping in a makeshift crib by Ford’s bed.  “Uh…”

              “Oh.  Yes.” Ford looked over at the babies as well. “Meet my nieces.”

              “Your…?”

              “Apparently, Stanley married the Pirate King, who is actually a woman, and sired these two children.  They were born shortly before we boarded.”

              “And the captain?” Fiddleford asked quietly.

              “She’s in the infirmary, recovering from giving birth.”  Tension left Fiddleford’s shoulders.  “Why are you worried about the safety of a woman that tried to kill you?” Ford asked. Fiddleford walked over to Ford’s bed and sat on it, peering at the infants with a gentle smile on his face.

              “I don’t like the idea of children growin’ up without their mother, that’s all,” he said.  One of the babies awoke, yawned widely, and stretched tiny arms out. “Aw, come here, sugar cube.” Fiddleford removed the infant from the crib.  “What a precious lil bean!” Fiddleford cooed.  The infant giggled.  “So sweet.” He looked up.  “What are their names?”

              “I didn’t think to ask,” Ford said, still a bit blindsided by how casual Fiddleford was being.  “Fiddleford, why are you taking this so well?”  Fiddleford shrugged.

              “Don’t rightly know.  Maybe it’s ‘cause I don’t really have a horse in this race.”

              “Hmm.”  Ford got up. He joined Fiddleford on his bed. “She really is adorable,” he said softly.  Fiddleford nodded, beaming.

              “She’s got yer nose.”

              “Heh.  Yeah. The other one has their mother’s nose. Here, I’ll show you.”  Ford removed his other niece from the crib. “And she’s a polydactyl as well.”

              “Really?”  Fiddleford looked at the infant.  “She must be somethin’ special, then.”  Ford nodded. He smiled weakly at his niece. The smile faded as he recognized the nose she’d inherited from her mother.  It was the same nose on his first mate.

              “Fiddleford…” Ford croaked.  Fiddleford looked at him in concern.

              “What’s wrong?” Fiddleford asked.  Ford stared at his first mate’s kind eyes.  They were the same blue as the fierce gaze the captain had levied upon him.  “Stanford?”

              “Why are you so concerned about the Pirate King?” Ford asked.

              “I- I just told ya.”  Fiddleford sounded bemused.  “I don’t think lil ones should grow up without their parents.”

              “You know her,” Ford whispered.  Fiddleford sobered.  He deposited the infant back into the makeshift crib.  “You know the Pirate King, Captain Sally McGowan.”

              “…Yes,” Fiddleford said softly.

              “How?  How do you know her?”

              “She’s my little sister,” Fiddleford whispered, his eyes closed.  Ford’s heart leapt into his mouth.  He swallowed it back down.

              “So these aren’t just my nieces.  They’re yours, too.”

              “Yes.”

              “I-”  Ford took a steadying breath.  “How long have you known that your sister is the Pirate King?”  Fiddleford was silent.  “How long, Fiddleford?”

              “Since the first time I came across her, back when she was still goin’ by Sully.”

              “All this time,” Ford whispered.  Fiddleford looked away.  “All this time, you knew who the Pirate King was, and you didn’t share this information with anyone?  Even though we were chasing her down?  You didn’t even- you didn’t even correct Toby’s information on who she- who she-”  Ford froze as the truth of the matter dawned upon him.  “You’re the one who tells me the information Toby collects.”

              “Yes.  I am.”

              “Toby’s information wasn’t wrong, was it?  He collected accurate information, you turned it inaccurate.”  Fiddleford was silent.  “How could you?  How could you betray this ship, this country, me?” Ford demanded.  His voice rose, startling the infant he was holding. She began to cry.

              “Stanford, please, put her back in the crib,” Fiddleford pleaded.  Ford held his niece closer.  “She’s scared.  She’s-”

              “How could you?!” Ford roared.  Fiddleford’s eyes filled with fire, emphasizing further the familial resemblance between him and the Pirate King.

              “She’s my baby sister!” Fiddleford snapped. “She’s been through hell and back. If I’d been there to support her when her life fell apart, maybe she might not have turned to piracy.  But I wasn’t!  No one- no one in my fam’ly was.  She was scared and alone, and I just want to protect her the way I should’ve, years ago.”  Ford’s heart pounded in his ears.  He got to his feet and threw open the cabin door.

              “Tad, take First Mate McGucket to the brig,” Ford commanded.  The crew on deck stopped what they were doing to stare.

              “Uh, why?” asked Tad.  Ford glared at Fiddleford.

              “Treason against the crown.”

              “Treason?”

              “He was helping the Pirate King this whole time,” Ford spat out.  Fiddleford bowed his head, accepting his fate.  Ford watched Fiddleford make his way to the brig without a fight.  He closed the door of his cabin.  His niece’s crying increased in volume. Tears slipped down Ford’s face. He hugged his niece tightly.  “I know, my dear,” he choked out.  “I- I feel the same way.”

----- 

              There was a knock at the door.  Ford took a steadying breath.

              “Enter,” he instructed.  The door opened, revealing Stan, his hands tied behind his back, held by Tad.  “Tad, you can leave Stanley in here.”

              “Are you sure, captain?  He’s a dangerous pirate.”

              “He won’t hurt me.”  Ford stared into Stan’s eyes.  “Not when I have the authority to remove his wife from the infirmary to the brig at any moment.”  Fear flashed across Stan’s face.  “He’ll cooperate.  Won’t you, Stanley?”

              “Yes,” Stan ground out.

              “See?  You can leave us.”  After watching Stan take a seat in front of Ford’s desk, Tad left.  “Your daughters are here,” Ford said, nodding at the makeshift crib.  Some of the stiffness in Stan’s posture left.  He stared at the crib longingly.  “I’ve been referring to them as Marina and Regina.”  Stan rolled his eyes.

              “Like I’d name my kids something like that,” he snorted.  He froze. “Wait, they’re- they’re both girls?” His voice was small.  Ford blinked.

              “You didn’t know that?”

              “No, I-”  Stan blinked furiously, trying to hold back tears.  “I knew one of ‘em was a girl, but I didn’t get to look at the other before your crew raided us.”

              “I suppose that you won’t be able to tell me their proper names, then,” Ford said softly.

              “No, I can’t.  We didn’t get a chance to name them.”

              “I see.”  The infant Ford had been calling Regina began to fuss softly.  Ford got up and gently removed her from the crib.  He sat back down at his desk.  Stan stared at Regina with an expression akin to hunger. His eyes shone with unshed tears. “They’ve been given the best of care,” Ford reassured his twin.

              “I figured,” Stan choked out.  “You wouldn’t- you wouldn’t hurt your own nieces.” Ford nodded.  “Are you gonna adopt them, once you’ve hanged their parents?” Ford winced.

              “Your wife asked the same question,” he murmured. The Pirate King hadn’t been aggressive towards Ford in the slightest when he checked in on her earlier.  Ford knew better than to think it was because she respected his authority.  He’d brought her the babies so that they could be fed.  The combination of her children’s presence and the fact she was still weak from giving birth was the more likely reason she didn’t yell at him or attack.

              “You know the punishment for piracy is hanging,” Captain Sally said idly, stroking her daughter’s hair.

              “Yes, I am aware.”

              “Once we arrive at port, Stan and I will be led to the noose.”  Captain Sally looked up at Ford.  Her body occasionally trembled from exhaustion, her hair looked like a bird had tried to nest in it, and she desperately needed a bath.  But there was a vicious intelligence in her expression that, despite the rest of her appearance, chilled Ford to the bone. “These little girls will be without parents.”  She cocked her head.  “Are you willing to orphan two newborns?”

              “You and Stan were the ones to commit high crimes.”

              “Yes.  We did.”  Captain Sally’s mouth curled in a cruel smile.  “But you’re the one to allow the execution of your twin brother.”

              “It’s not- it’s not like I’ll be the executioner,” Ford protested.

              “Hmm.”  Captain Sally kissed the top of her daughter’s head. “Are you going to take in your nieces? Or will you have them be raised in an orphanage?”

              “We’re worried about our daughters,” Stan said. “Like good parents would be.”  His voice cracked halfway through his sentence. Ford’s heart sunk.  He’d picked up on Stan’s unsaid fear.

              “I’m gonna be a shitty dad, just like I had. But worse.  At least Pops was around.  I won’t be.”  Ford stood. He walked over to Stan and, onehanded, cut through the rope tying his brother’s hands.

              “Here,” Ford said softly.  He held Regina out.  “Hold your daughter.”  Stan took his daughter.  He stared at her wordlessly.

              “Hi, princess,” Stan whispered, stroking her cheek. Regina giggled.  Stan let out a strangled laugh.  Tears began to stream down his face.  Ford looked away from the tender, intimate scene.  “You’re so gorgeous.  Just like your mama.”  Ford could feel his resolve wavering.

              Am I willing to allow my nieces to be orphaned?  Am I willing to let my twin brother be hanged?  I don’t think I am.

----- 

              Stan was awoken by the sound of singing. Familiar singing.  He looked over at Fiddleford, in the cell next to his. Fiddleford nodded silently.

              “Those ‘re merfolk,” Fiddleford confirmed.  Stan got to his feet.

              “Something’s going down, isn’t it?”

              “Yes.”

              “What?”

              “I don’t rightly know,” Fiddleford said softly. Footsteps sounded.

              “I do,” Ford said solemnly, stopping in front of his twin and former first mate.  Fiddleford scrambled to his feet.  “A colony of merfolk that was allied with the Pirate King heard she was taken, so they rescued her, her crew, and her ship.”  Ford took a key out of his pockets.  He unlocked the doors to both cells.  “My entire crew, including myself, was powerless in the face of their magic.  In the chaos, my former first mate disappeared.”

              “Ford-” Stan started.  Ford met Stan’s eyes squarely.  They were glistening with unshed tears.

              “My greatest regret, however, is that the two children found on the Pirate King’s ship were also taken.  I wish I could have kept them from growing up with pirates. And I wish I could have discovered who their parents were.”

              “Stanford,” Fiddleford whispered.  Stan’s mouth went dry.  Ford turned away.  Fiddleford and Stan followed him to the deck.  Sweet Viola was waiting nearby, a bridge already set up between Angie’s ship and Ford’s.  And waiting by that bridge was a woman Stan hadn’t seen in over a week.

              “Angie!” Stan croaked.  Angie looked up.  Her blonde hair whipped in the night wind, her eyes were wide with fear, exhaustion, and sorrow.  Stan ran over and scooped her into his arms, enveloping her in a warm embrace.  Angie sobbed.  Stan’s heart broke.  His wife so rarely allowed herself to display any sort of emotion that could be interpreted as weakness.

              “I- I was so terrified I’d lose ya, and lose the babies,” Angie hiccupped.  Stan squeezed her tighter.  “I love you so much, darlin’.”

              “I love you, too,” Stan whispered.  He gently released her from the embrace. “The babies?”

              “Already on board.  Dan’s got ‘em.”

              “Good.”  Stan turned to Ford, standing nearby, his hands clasped behind his back and face stoic. “Stanford…”

              “This night will ruin my career, everything I’ve worked towards,” Ford said.  “But my crew wasn’t prepared to handle an assault of merfolk.  And I…”  Ford’s facial expression broke.  “I wasn’t prepared to lose my twin, sister-in-law, and first mate, as well as orphan my nieces.”

              “If ya ever want to give up the straight and narrow, my ship is more than happy to take ya on,” Angie said softly.  Ford merely nodded in response.

              “Thank you,” Stan said.  Ford nodded again.  His mouth quivered.  “I won’t forget this.”

              “There’s nothing to forget,” Ford said.  His voice shook.  “After all, this never happened.”  With that, he turned on his heel and marched back into his cabin. Angie took Stan’s hand and dragged him over to the Sweet Viola.  Fiddleford followed.

              “Set off, men,” Angie instructed the gathered crew. “We’ll celebrate once we’ve crossed the horizon.”

              “Aye, aye captain,” the crow intoned.  Angie headed for her cabin.  Again, Stan and Fiddleford followed.  Dan was inside, holding both of the babies.  He wordlessly handed one to Angie and one to Stan.

              “Thank you, Dan.  Go resume your duties,” Angie instructed.  Dan nodded and left the cabin.  Angie stroked the hair of the infant in her arms.  “Lord, they’re so beautiful.”

              “They take after their mama that way,” Stan whispered.  Angie smiled at him.  “Did Ford tell you he named them?”

              “Oh?”

              “Marina and Regina.”

              “Huh.”  Angie gazed down at her daughter.  “I kind of like those names.”

              “What?  Really?”

              “Yes.”  She held her daughter close to her chest.  “And even if I didn’t, it would be wrong to not honor Stanford fer what he did fer ‘em.  They should know.”  Stan looked down at the baby in his arms.  She yawned and stretched, flexing six fingers on one hand.  He swallowed the lump in his throat.

              “Yeah.  They should.”