#musclemen in jeans

[hejira33312]

[octuscle]

My professor is such a pain in the ass! I tried turning him into an average dumb college frat guy, but it’s not working!

Whew! Indeed, your professor is a tough nut to crack. He's as stiff as if he'd swallowed a stick. On time like a Swiss watch. And the strictest teacher imaginable. I'll see what I can do. Time is pressing, it's Friday and the exam period starts on Monday.

07:30. Your professor's shiny Volvo rolls into the faculty parking lot. He's always on time to the second. His suit may be cheap, but it's immaculate. And he walks into the staff room with his hair perfectly parted. No one notices the small tattoo on his forearm.

When he arrives at your lecture, it's like a sensation: he's not wearing polished Oxfords, he's wearing sneakers. Pretty cool, pretty expensive sneakers. And WHITE socks! He's never been seen wearing anything like that before. And you swear his stomach is flatter. Normally his jacket always conceals a tummy bulge. But now his silhouette is perfectly slim. Unfortunately, it doesn't change anything about his lecture. He's way too fast, firing his questions like a sniper in the direction of the students who weren't paying attention. He's a pain in the ass, and that hasn't changed yet.

During the lunch break, the professor is seen wearing jeans for the first time. Pretty crisp fitting jeans. He really has a tight ass. And damn: Does he actually have a beard shadow? Normally he's always perfectly shaved. You're sitting in the canteen with your bruhs when he approaches you and asks "All gud, bruhs? can one of you give me uh fag? I must have forgotten mine at home…" You are far too surprised not to give him a cigarette. "You're such uh lifesaver, dude," says your professor and asks what you're up to this weekend. You tell him about your plans to go to the sports bar, work out in the gym and maybe take a trip to the beach on Sunday. "Sick thing" replies the professor. "See you around, bruhs!" He leaves you with your mouths hanging open.

The professor leaves the parking lot in his open-top Mustang with loud hip-hop music and screeching tires. You grin broadly. Your plan seems to be working. You are sure of it when you meet the next day at the gym. Your professor has a cool haircut, a stylish beard and looks like he's a regular at the tattoo parlor. You greet each other with a fist bump. And when he takes off his sweaty T-shirt after two hours, you say goodbye with a chest bump. Damn, this guy has a killer body.

On the beach, your prof disappears from time to time with random people and goes to the trunk of his Mustang. Shit, he's selling drugs. Hashish or apparently steroids and other stuff. And at sunset you see him lying on his towel smoking pot while one of the musclemen from the gym massages his nipples. Fuck, the boner in his surfer shorts is impressive. You're very pleased with yourself. You don't need to be afraid of tomorrow. It's a good thing you didn't waste the weekend studying.

Hot picture, you think to yourself on Monday morning when you see your professor's latest post on Instagram. And then you read the caption: "Sicc training 2 start the new wk. Now let's go kicc sum student ass. I luv it when i c the airheads sweating over my exam questions"

Pic found @marechais

[abuddyforeveryseason]

This isn't the Buddy for April 1st. April Fools, yes it is!

Seems like Buddy himself's been the victim of a prank today. He was so mad about it, he murdered the prankster.

The good thing about April Fool's day is that you can say anything you honestly believe no matter how unpopular an opinion it is, and just pretend it was a prank the following day.

Even if you admit beforehand that's what you're doing, you can just say admitting it was part of the joke.

Or, you can use that preface to make it look like what follows, a piece of comedy, is what you actually believe.

So, let's see what's a hot take…

I've been reading about the action boom of the eighties and nineties lately, back when Arnold Shwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone would rack up hundreds of kills under two hours. I've seen some of those movies. Some were good, some not so much. Remember when Rambo befriended those afghani freedom fighters? The Mujahideen? Yeah, that ended well.

But for a lot of cultural critics back then, they represented the end of the world. Even though some of the greatest movies of all time came out during that era, there were some reviewers lamenting the death of movies as an artform. And the one thing they would latch on was, the movies were so underwritten, the starts couldn't even speak english.

They were talking, of course, of Schwarzenegger, Jean-Claude van Damme and Dolph Lundgren. Stallone himself was lumped in with those foreigners, but he had some laurels under his belt in the form of a few Oscar nominations, so most of the focus fell on the foreigners.

And that's the thing, really - it's not that those actors were stupid, exactly. They just had heavy accents. And, you know, a different cultural background that was dismissed as a lack of acting talent. So from the get-go, a lot of those movies were being dismissed thanks to xenophobia.

Sure, they were european, instead of coming from the "darker" continents of Africa, Asia and South America. But it's not like any big stars from those continents were offered as a contrast for the hammy musclemen of the eighties. The best you could find is the martial arts stars from Taiwan, and those movies weren't exactly high art either.

If you ignore the accent issue (and the difficulty that comes from acting in a different country), that trio wasn't exactly stupid. Schwarzenegger might not be a pleasant person, but he was pretty smart as a businessman and politician. He managed to build a good acting career and avoid a lot of acting pitfalls through business savy. He knew how to make money in Hollywood, even if it meant sacrificing his own dignity and suffering bad reviews. He was even aware of his shortcomings as an actor, which is he he kept choosing the action and comedy fare that paid the bills.

Van Damme, meanwhile, wasn't as clever, but had a lot more emotional intelligence. His french films, which aren't burdened by the abismal accent and acting, are more enjoyable and mature, and even show some introspection you'd never imagine from a martial artist.

Lundgren, meanwhile, wasn't as big a star as the others, but is a better fit for the clichè of genius strongman - Good grades, scholarship, a masters in chemical engineering… It's funny that if Lundgren had played a scientist in a movie back then, it'd be dismissed as a ridiculous thing (unless the critic was aware of his story) - a monosyllabic musclehead like that a scientist? Nonsense.

Of course, nowadays, these celebrities are all decadent half-forgotten gloryhogs. And those action movies of the eighties are just a piece of nostalgia, now. They only survive as inspiration for videogames (where the violence is more interesting because the player's the one in control, and there's actually a difficulty curve to consider), or as aspects of more nuanced stories.

The idea that movies were "dying" back in the eighties sounds like nonsense now. The indie boom that followed paved way to some amazing movies. And to this day, a lot of the best stuff coming out is informed by the movie culture of the eighties. Meanwhile, all the cultural critics who spelled doom for the movies have been forgotten, mixed up with the ones who worried about satanic cults and the gay revolution.

I'm not a huge cinema buff, and I won't pretend to know a lot about cinema, but I still get annoyed when people complain about the death of the movies. Maybe the issue is, you're the one getting old, Buddy.

[barklyvanish]

Artistic Posing Of Francis Benfatto

#ArtisticPosing #Bodybuilding #Posing #FrancisBenfatto

[supermen-with-black-hair]

💥As soon as I find out just who you are, I’m gonna come lookin’...

200812

[bald-tales]

IVAN - MASTER BARBER

Sequel to New Life for Cooper by Titan

PART ONE

Summary

Cooper Denwood and his gym trainer become twin security guards. They will work for Ivan the mysterious barber sending candidates from the local university to Sam’s Barbershop.

This is a new story which carries on from New Life for Cooper!

Cooper and Roger are transformed into their new role as security guards at the nearby university. They will help direct wayward students to Sam’s Barbershop for processing into real men.

Part one.

Pete quickly finished his mail route not caring about finding number 60 Caxton street any more, getting rid of the letter in a trash can. He went to feel above his lip a few times but it still seemed just the downey hairs he’d already grown. So maybe this stuff didn’t work so quickly. Still there had to be a way to make some money, out of his weird discovery, even if it did seem a bit freaky! He certainly knew he needed money urgently for a gambling debt and the mail job paid a mere pittance for what he’d racked up on the horses.

When he got home to his rundown apartment he grabbed a beer and sat down contemplating what to do next. His top lip felt itchy and as he went to scratch it he nearly dropped the beer he held in the other hand. He had a moustache. It felt like a real, bristly mo. He got up and went to the wall mirror. Sure enough, he had a blonde moustache, not big or that thick but definitely better than any tache he’d tried to grow previously. He could see stubble appearing all over his moustache area and beyond. In the exact areas he’d applied the creamy oil to in the barbershop.

‘So that stuff really works?’ He said aloud not believing it really, but there was the proof before him. It made him look older already. He liked it as he stroked its edges. He started to feel turned on wondering how much he could change his look. Then an idea occurred to him based on what he’d seen in the barbershop. He grabbed his small hairdryer and turning it on he focused the hot air on his newly sprouting moustache. He felt silly at first as nothing really happened.

Then it started. Whiskers were sprouting from above his new moustache, right to his nostrils. Then further to each side. Small blonde bristles erupted from previous smooth areas telling him his new moustache was going to be one serious facial adornment? Did he want a Magnum type tache? Well he could always shave it off he thought. He still liked his goatee and wished he could use some of that hair growth serum on his sorry one now. It looked kind of silly with his big brushlike moustache. Turning the hairdryer off he marvelled at what had taken less than 3 hours to grow. That was how long it had been since he’d left the barbershop. He’d never liked a moustache on its own before, thinking it made someone look more 80s porn star but something about seeing it on those twins earlier made him feel turned on. He could still smell the pipe smoke. He stroked its thickness feeling his cock grow in his jeans. Maybe he could look more like those musclemen. How much was not the work of nature or workouts?

BACK AT SAMS BARBERSHOP

When the both barbers had finished sculpting their slaves new moustaches they were real works of art. Sam was surprised Ivan had decided to colour the whiskers differently. Rogers was dyed blonde, and Coopers black. Ivan thought it added to the illusion of Cooper being the Daddy. Sam thought it clever too, their former hair colourings were reversed on their moustaches.

Sam added after the moustaches were rinsed and dried, “It will be a pity if they shave these beauties off.” “I already thought of that.” Ivan added while taking a small paintbrush and dipping it in a pot Sam hadn’t seen before. He watched Ivan paint over Rogers dense moustache with the clear, shiny substance. “What’s that?” Sam asked a little puzzled. “A little insurance. It’s something I came across in the cellar recently.” Sam knew the cellar was full of concoctions and potions of all sorts and Ivan was always careful to label everything correctly. He looked closely at the label. ‘Memory growth’ it read. “What’s that do?” “Ensures they keep these beautiful moustaches we’ve created. If they shave them off they will grow again exactly to the style and shape you see here. And the growth rate is fast; these beauties will only take a couple of hours or so to become as thick as this so they’ll soon tire of trying to shave them. Still, I have a little extra insurance to stop them trying to shave often.” “Insurance?” Sam asked getting a little exited about theses new ideas for their slaves. Sam had always got off on Ivan’s body-modification ideas not really knowing why. “A moustache that can’t be shaved off. Drawn on of course.” Ivan snickered which was rare for him. “Like a tattoo?” Sam knew the answer already. “Yes.” Ivan answered as he worked the brush over Coopers thick bristles. “Wow! Amazing. But what about the colour?” “That they also cannot change. Everything on their top lip will be permanent.” Ivan smiled as he watched the whiskers develop a sheen as the gel dried. “Also gives the hairs a permanent soft and healthy shine. So there is no upkeep concerns for our security boys.”

Sam was always amazed at the potions Ivan produced. Well, they were also great for mere mortals like Sam to use, while Ivan equally got to benefit from them as his special magic only worked for him in his own barbershop a few miles away but more about that later. “Yes these are a permanent look for our new security guards. They will be very popular at the college.” When Ivan finished he looked the two over, turning their heads from side to side. “A few piercings and they will look the part.” Ivan picked up the phone and dialled a number. After a moment he said, "Garvey? I have a couple of customers for you. No, I need this done here and now! Sam shuddered as he realised Ivan had called the rough, overweight guy simply known as Garvey, who owned a rundown piercing and tattoo shop nearby. They had met when Garvey passed the shop one day, his piercings glimmering in the light. Ivan knew then what some of his slaves needed and it wasn’t hard to get Garvey on side, the pipe and the beer for one, but Ivan seemed to be able to control Garvey easily as both seemed to have the same sadistic streak.

**********

Pete didn’t know what to do with his new-found knowledge of Ivan’s special barbershop. Blackmail seemed to be the way to go for now. Surely nothing going on in that shop was legal. He wanted to go back and take a closer look soon. In fact something deep down told him he must. He smiled as he stroked his new moustache. For once in his sorry existence, luck seemed to be on his side.

**********

Meanwhile, Garvey had arrived at the Barbershop and was attending to his newest customers. Already he had pierced both ears of Cooper and now he was completing Roger with exactly the same look. Both men wore heavy gauge silver rings which stood out from their dark, shaved scalps. Their joins would be soldered closed permanently. He then proceeded to pierce their nipples before adding a equally oversized ring to their generous penises, Garvey licking his lips as he saw the finished product. All the time the two men were completely at ease, totally in a trance despite the size of Garvey’s piercing tool. Sam shuddered as he watched the cruel piercer at work. The small mans head shone under the shop lights, beads of sweat forming on the smooth scalp. What he lacked in height, Garvey made up in weight. His belly exposed from beneath a tight wife-beater. Sam realised it was lucky the men were under a spell as the size of their piercings would have really hurt.

“Now Garvey, I want to ensure they keep these brushes above their top lip.” Ivan said as he readied some heavy duty clippers. “Well they are pretty amazing master.” Garvey returned always referring to Ivan as master. Sam had no doubt Ivan had a supernatural control over the brut. “First things first.” Ivan said as he switched on the clippers. The still mesmerised Roger was first as Ivan took the clippers to the newly grown moustache reducing it to stubble in a matter of seconds. “Sam, shave him smooth.” Ivan said to a stunned Sam. Sam despite his shock knew not to question the barber and started lathering the top lip while Ivan clipped Coopers black moustache to nothing.

It wasn’t long before Sam saw what Ivan wanted. Garvey was using his needle and black ink to fashion a small, stylised pencil-thin moustache on Roger. He took his time enjoying the chance to draw on these silly moustaches. Yes these boys would look pretty stupid with just drawn on black thin moustaches. Ivan asked Garvey to ensure the ends curled ala Hercule Poroit, Agatha Christies famous Belgium detective.

It wasn’t long before Coopers top lip had the same small tattooed moustache with a small curl at each end. “So that’s your insurance Ivan.” Sam said as he tidied up his shaving equipment. “Well they do look a bit obvious don’t they.” Ivan said as he bent down and whispered something to Garvey. “So how long will the moustaches take to regrow?” Sam asked. “Not long.” Ivan said as he studied their new tattoos. “In fact why don’t we try it out on you old man.” Ivan said as he picked up the pot and showed it menacingly to Sam. "But Ivan, I…I won’t shave my moustache….you know….I like my look. Sam said nervously not wanting to upset Ivan. He knew his temper and what he was capable of. “I know Sam. That’s the problem. You like how I have made you over; a little too much judging by your ‘older gentleman’ makeovers recently. You need to be punished for your slip up today and I have just the idea.” Now Sam was really worried. Then putting the pot down added, “Garvey, take Roger over to the waiting area.” Garvey took the arm of Roger while Ivan whispered in Rogers ear to go with Garvey.

“Now Sam, into the chair, we have work to do.” “Please, Master, I like how I look now….” Sam implored not sure how far Ivan would go. “Don’t argue with me or it will be worse.” Ivan almost spat back. Sam knew not to argue. He sat reluctantly in the barber’s chair as Ivan turned the chair away from the mirror. Then he fired up some high-pitched beard trimmers. “I think you need to look more sinister for a start, not so fatherly.” Ivan said as he attacked Sam’s pride and joy. He removed the end curls then scaled the thickness back. Finally, he worked the moustache thinner so it was more angular and straighter. All the time, Sam was imaging how silly he looked now. And to scare him even more Ivan started reducing the thickness of Sam’s heavy white eyebrows making them much tamer. Finally, he wheeled over Sam’s electrolysis equipment. As he fired up the needle he added,“as you always say Sam, the needle has a much more exacting result than my depilatories.” As he fashioned the outline of Sam’s new moustache he knew it was stinging as he saw tears forming in Sam’s eyes. Though maybe they were tears of despair as Sam realised his former handlebar moustache was gone forever. In its place he could feel a smaller moustache being fashioned as he noticed the line Ivan was forming with the needle. Then the needle headed for his new eyebrows. What was Ivan turning him into?

“Not really the sinister look yet master.” Garvey said. " I know, but let’s keep going." And picking up the small pot and dipping the brush in it he applied the ‘memory formula’ to the new moustache. Being the same one he used on Cooper it was colouring the moustache jet-black. Of course Sam couldn’t see this but knew he wouldn’t like whatever Ivan was doing to his moustache. Then he applied it to the new brows. It seemed to take years off Sam, Garvey thought as he licked his lips. He’d always been attracted to the barber and now Sam was being modified to look younger and more like a stylish version of Garvey.

Finally, Ivan took the small clippers and removed every hair on his Sam’s head; moustache, eyebrows and finally the horseshoe of white hair on Sam’s head. Sam was alarmed when he realised his Ivan-created mpb was shaved clean. What was Ivan doing? As if reading his mind, Ivan started applying shave cream to Sam’s head before completely shaving it clean, taking his time to make everything smooth. Finally, his special depilatory cream was rubbed into Sam’s newly denuded scalp adding, “quicker and less painful than your electrolysis eh Sam?”

Now Sam realised Ivan was making him permanently bald as he felt the tingling sensation of the depilatory as it tightened and dried. “Well, we are well on our way to a whole new Sam. Now Garvey, how about helping with Sam’s new persona.” “Gladly master.” And he readied his tattooing equipment Ivan said, “You will stay perfectly still Sam if you know what’s good for you.” Sam didn’t know what to say, he wasn’t so sure about what was to happen. He’d never had a tattoo before though he liked them on younger men then he felt the chair recline backwards away from the mirror. With Garvey and his penchant for ink readying the needles, Sam knew his skin was a blank canvas for the madman. “Now Sam, stay perfectly still. Don’t want any mistakes.” Garvey almost purred in Sam’s ear scaring him even more. Then Ivan came over and touched Sam’s forehead. "Maybe we should let you sleep old friend. You look nervous and there is no need for you to feel Garvey’s nasty needles. Sam was hardly aware as he was put into a trance.

Sam was suddenly aware of voices. Garvey’s first, then Ivan’s. As the fog in his mind began to clear he hoped it had all been a nightmare. As he opened his eyes he tried to focus on the figure he could see in front of him. ‘Shit!’ He said to himself. How long had he been out. Obviously, Ivan had put him under one of his trances. His mouth dropped as he focused on the mirror before him. A much younger and tougher looking man stared back. He went to touch his upper lip where now only a thin black moustache remained. It was tattooed on, pencil thin and unjoined in the middle, Clarke Gabel style. His eyebrows were also tattooed black and thin, almost feminine. But what puzzled him most was his bald head. It seemed to have dark stubble on the sides while totally shiny skin on top. Didn’t Ivan apply a depilatory to his scalp. As he went to touch it he could only feel smooth skin. It looked like he had stubble but he couldn’t feel any, only hairless skin. “What the fuck?” He suddenly said.

“I see you’ve noticed Garvey’s work.” Ivan appeared in the mirror from behind him. “At least you still have your male pattern baldness only this way, it’s maintainance free. Plus it adds to the tough barber look, which I think this shop was missing.” “It’s a head tattoo?” Sam asked as he touched the bare scalp noting the tenderness. “Often known as micro scalp pigmentation.” Garvey added as he came up and started applying a lotion to the tattoo. “This will help get rid of the redness. Yes I think this new look really suits you Sam.” “You…you…tattooed my head?” Sam growled out just preventing himself from shouting. “It takes a bit more work as well as technique Sam.” Garvey started to put his tattoo equipment away, “much more realistic for a start old man.” His tone reflecting his annoyance at Sam’s lack of appreciation do the technique.

“Your Garvey’s first customer Sam. He had to learn all aspects of creating hairline tattoos. It needs all sorts of expertise to replicate the hair follicle, make it look natural.” “But I look ridiculous Ivan.” Sam said turning his head to the side. Though he had to admit the hair did look realistic and natural. What didn’t look natural was the tattoo above his lip. “Maybe at the moment but in another hour or so you’ll see a real moustache replacing the tattooed one. Just like Roger and Cooper.” Ivan looked across at the next chair where Cooper still sat. His tattooed black moustache was hidden by stubble already. Looking towards the waiting area he could see Rogers blonde moustache almost hiding the black tattoo already. He hoped his own moustache was a lot bigger than the pencil thin tattoo he saw before him but he doubted it after remembering the electrolysis pen. As he touched the top lip he could feel whiskers emerging but only along the tattoo areas.

“Well, I’ll take our bodybuilders home with me but first we need our security guards to begin their new life.” And with that he began talking to the entranced giants. First to Cooper in the other barber’s chair then Roger in the waiting area. Slowly at first, as he outlined their new lives. With Ivan’s powerful talents at hypnosis Cooper and Roger would be his from now on. Their main job, sending potential students to this barbershop and maybe even his own shop. They would both live in Ivan’s spare room until he’d organise an apartment closer to the college. He would make sure all history of their previous lives would be erased so as no loose ends for anyone to follow. When he’s finished he brought them out of their trance. Cooper blinked rapidly as he looked in the mirror ahead. Roger was next as he saw his twin beside him. " “Fuck! You look hot.” Cooper said in a much deeper voice. Ivan added, " just like his Daddy. Isn’t that what you wanted of your slave. Touching his lush moustache, Roger had a contented look. “I…I …look good Cooper.” “It’s Master from now on son. You remember that.” Cooper said with a new seriousness, nothing like his former self. ���Oh, you forgot your pipe now Cooper.” Ivan grabbed the pipe and handed it to him. He had ensured they were both rewired for their new lives. Cooper would be the pipe-smoking, rough daddy, Roger his boy. Roger immediately went to help his Master lite it.

It was decided Sam and Garvey would drive the new security guards to campus each day for now. A couple of tattoos would complete their new look but Ivan said that could become a work in progress for Garvey from tomorrow. Meanwhile he asked Garvey to stay the night. “But Ivan……where…..where is he to sleep, I don’t have any room.” Sam said not understanding Ivan’s motives. “Garvey is more than happy to share with you.” Ivan returned as he winked at Garvey. Sam looked nervously at Garvey who had started licking his lips as he undressed Sam with his eyes. What Sam didn’t know was Garvey was into the old barber look that Ivan had transformed Sam into. Well, originally Garvey wasn’t until helped along by Ivan. And now Ivan liked seeing Sam squirm. He’d been getting too familiar and assertive lately and Garvey was the man to reign him in.

“Now I’ll leave and let you two get more acquainted.” Ivan said with a smirk. “But Ivan, I don’t…..” Sam tried to say. “Samuel, from now on you and Garvey are a team. I want him living here with you and I don’t want any argument.” As soon as Sam heard Ivan say Samuel he knew not to question his master. “In fact, for the moment, Garvey is in charge seeing you have let me down. You will help him work the other chair from now on. You will teach him all he needs to know in the use of my special potions.” Sam looked horrified as he turned to Garvey who was pursing his lips before saying, “Yes Sam, together we will be a one stop shop for those university brats.” “Now remember Sam, Garvey’s in charge.” Ivan said as he readied to leave. “Yes Ivan.” “I’m sorry?” “Yes Master.” “Oh and Garvey still has a few ideas for the new you. No longer old Sam. Now our ‘in-charge’ master-barber.” Ivan started to laugh, something he never did much.

Sam didn’t like the sound of any of this. Not one bit.

When Ivan left the shop with Roger and Cooper in tow, Garvey started in on Sam. “Now Sam back in the chair, I have work to do.” His eyes were cold but Sam didn’t want to resist. He was scared of Garvey, probably more than Ivan at the moment. He watched as Garvey prepared his piercing needles. He knew then he was at the mercy of a man obsessed with body jewellery.

[breezeinmonochromenight]

What Your Favorite JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Ship Says About You:

(transcript for a friend by request - see source for video link)

Jotakak (Jotaro Kujo/Noriaki Kakyoin): You have an intricate knowledge of CLAMP研究所’s back catalogue.

Bruabba (Bruno Buccellati/Leone Abbacchio): Your ideal relationship dynamic is ‘team mom/team dad’.

Caejose (Caesar Zeppeli/Joseph Joestar): Your ideal relationship dynamic is 'guys being dudes’.

Fugonara (Pannacotta Fugo/Narancia Ghirga): Your ideal relationship dynamic is 'Pinky and the Brain’.

Giomis (Giorno Giovanna/Guido Mista): You are a firm believer in the inherent eroticism of that meme that’s like “yeah we gay, keep scrollin’”.

Josuyasu (Josuke Higashkita/Okuyasu Nijimura): You are a firm believer in the inherent eroticism of being stupid together.

Jonadio (Jonathan Joestar/Dio Brando): You are a firm believer in the inherent eroticism of not only wanting to kill each other, but actually going through with it.

Josuhan (Josuke Higashkita/Rohan Kishibe): You think the key to a good rom-com is making sure the main couple hates each other for a good liiike… one-third of the movie, at least.

Gyjo (Gyro Zeppeli/Johnny Joestar): This is just the same joke as Joseph and Caesar, except you actually read the manga and probably won’t shut up about it.

Bosudopi or Diadopp (Diavolo/Vinegar Doppio): You aren’t a monsterfucker, and yet somehow your ideal relationship dynamic is the plot of the movie Venom (2018).

Avpol (Mohamed Avdol/Jean Pierre Polnareff): You’re just here for some friendly musclemen.

Fugio (Pannacotta Fugo/Giorno Giovanna): You’re just here for some bishis.

Risopro (Risotto Nero/Prosciutto): You just wanna fuck villains, and really, who wouldn’t?

Brugio (Bruno Buccellati/Giorno Giovanna): You want to get licked by Bruno Buccellati.

Diopucci (Dio Brando/Enrico Pucci): You just wanted good things for Pucci, and like, honestly, good things for Pucci probably could have saved everyone a loooot of trouble.

JosuJota (Josuke Higashkita/Jotaro Kujo): You are horny, feral and probably not even ashamed that I’m about to hit you with this (FBI Open Up) meme. 

Meloghia or Ghialone (Ghiaccio/Melone): You are always a slut for characters who are just… straight up unhinged.

Abbagio (Leone Abbachio/Giorno Giovanna): This is just the same joke as Josuke and Rohan, but you’re also always a slut for male boob windows.

Yukakoi (Yukako Yamagishi/Koichi Hirose): You either want a yandere gf or you want to be a yandere gf.

Jonaeri (Jonathan Joestar/Erina Pendleton): You really wish Jonathan hadn’t been done so dirty by the ending of Part 1.

Jolymes (Jolyne Cujoh/Ermes Costello): You really wish Anasui hadn’t swapped genders between chapters.

Jozie (Joseph Joestar/Suzie Q): You really wish Josuke could have been concieved under liiike… any other circumstances.

Mistrish (Guido Mista/Trish Una): You really like the movie Your Name (2016).

Diejoni (Diego Brando/Johnny Joestar): You are a scalie.

(I feel attacked lol)

[octuscle]

The new foreman

Charles didn't usually work out this late. He was usually at the gym first thing in the morning. Right at 06:00, when it opened. First thing, that way he could be at his desk at 08:00, freshly shaved and showered. Fit for the day. And second, he didn't want to work out with the big boys. He was bothered by the groans and grunts when they were lifting iron. And the noise when the dumbbells were thrown to the floor with their last ounce of strength after the last repetition. He wasn't here to build mountains of muscle. He just wanted to stay fit.

But today he had taken the morning off. His day started late today with a business lunch. He had taken advantage of that and worked out longer than usual. Around 09:00, the first group of musclemen arrived at the training area. Again, Charles had been annoyed by the loud alpha animals in the free weight area. Whereby he had to think about the guys again and again during the final sauna session. Yes, they were damn good looking. But to look like that, he would have had to start training years earlier. And coming here for an hour three times a week wasn't going to do any good.

Charles showered, shaved, and walked toward his locker with a towel around his hips. On the floor next to his locker, crumpled up, was a piece of cloth. Charles glanced around. No one to be seen. He picked up the fabric and realized it was a jockstrap. Had to belong to one of the big boys, it was still damp. And it was stained and crusty. Charles's pulse raced. How many times had he jerked off to fantasies of jockstraps pissed and jerked all over? He didn't think for a second and pulled on the jockstrap. And as fast as he could, he pulled his underwear over it. He could only hope that the scent of his freshly washed boxers would mask the stench of cum and piss. And he couldn't wait to press the jockstrap into his face after work. A stain of precum was forming on his boxers.

Charles was on time at the restaurant for his business lunch. His client was not there yet. The jockstrap story had been a stupid idea. His precum could be seen on his suit pants, too. So Charles quickly went to the washrooms to correct that a bit. Besides, he had to pee. At the urinal, he noticed that his boxers were gone. Had he forgotten them? That was even more unfortunate, hopefully the pants kept the stench of the jockstrap away. Although the stench made Charles horny. He stowed his magnificent cock, buttoned up his jeans and went back to his table. The customer still wasn't there. He was warm and the jacket was too tight. So he took it off and hung it over the back of the chair. The restaurant wasn't so posh that anyone would have minded. His customer was in the construction business and liked things a little more rustic.

He had to wait a solid half hour before his customer finally arrived. He stood up and greeted him with a firm handshake. "Call me Chuck," Charles said, and asked if he should order two beers. His customer nodded and said he was relieved. He'd been expecting one of those college boys. But would rather talk to a man. Chuck grinned, tucked his thumbs behind his mighty belt buckle and said it was much the same for him. Lunch wasn't about business for a second. The two men talked football, they talked politics, they talked hunting. Chuck was happy that they were both on the same page. Small talk was a horror to him. He was a simple fella and loved straight talk. And his conversation partner wasn't one of those tieflings, either. After Chuck rolled up the sleeves of his flannel shirt and undid two more buttons, his pal just grinned and followed suit.

After two hours, lunch was over. Chuck wanted to pay, but one look was enough to understand it wasn't his turn today. "Son, I have an excellent feeling about you. You're going to be a good foreman. I expect to see you at the job site on Main Street at 06:00 tomorrow morning. The two chimed in and his boss turned and left. Chuck grinned. He knew how to wrap people around his finger. He put on his cap, grabbed his gym bag and headed for his car. With the new job, he had to change his routines. Gym before work was no longer an option. But he could go lift some iron now. And head out for a few beers with the lads afterwards.

A deep bow to @stargazerguy for this and many other inspirations!

[babesofstageandscreen]

The Mae West movies and their success was a lifeline for Paramount studios. Hounded by the Hays office and Hearst newspapers Mae eventually gave up the movies and returned to the stage. At age 68 she starred in a cabaret act.... surrounded by musclemen.... a show that ran for 3 years. Jean Harlow was Hollywood's sweetheart and a sex symbol. In 1932 she married Paul Bern. Three months after their marriage he shot himself. She went on to marry a cameraman 16 years her senior. She fell in love with co star William Powell... 20 years her senior.... but he refused to marry her. She was far from the dumb blonde portrayed on the screen.... she even wrote a more than passable novel before her early death at age 26 . Bugsy Siegel was one of the major figures in Murder Inc. By the time he was 25 he had his own suite in the Waldorf Astoria.. Lucky Luciano was living 2 floors above. Bugsy was driving through the quiet town of Las Vegas in 1945 when it struck him that this would    be the ideal location for a casino. He raised $6million and built ........the Flamingo Hotel. On 20th June 1947 assassins burst into Bugsy's Beverly Hills home and filled him with lead. No one was ever charged with the murder.

[broodingmuscle]

The photo from slovak musclemen, 2008. The guy in jeans bearhugging the guy in sweat pants. "So any more challenges for me, big bro? What's that I can't hear you." It is one of my all time favorite photos. Do you know the original photo or video source?

I have this as the original tumblr poster:

http://musculardude.tumblr.com/post/62254083426/hes-a-lot-weaker-than-i-thought

Aside from that I have no idea, but I agree it is a hot photo. Love the cocky look on his face.

[supermen-with-black-hair]

“So I got abs... big deal!”

੨੦੦੬੧੬

[supermen-with-black-hair]

When I said “get me Superman!”....

I didn’t think they would actually go find him! 🇮🇩🇮🇩🇮🇩

టో ఎల్నెన్ట। ౨౦౦౮౨౧

[supermen-with-black-hair]

Waiting for an opening...

হারাসু ॥ ২০০৬০২ ॥ Harasu