#much more work for me bc now i also have to either scan things in or spend forever editing photos
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zemnarihah · 2 years ago
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just hooked up my printer in order to scan my design hw
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crheativity · 3 months ago
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Congrats for your 200 followers, hopefully you will grow more!
Can I request Silver at 7 pm? Cuddling with him in MC room, specially since how busy he can be as Malleus guard. Hopefully this is fine.
WARNINGS: ametuer poetry lol
COMMENTS: Hey Anon! Thank you so much for the request! I hope you don’t mind but I changed it slightly to make it just a little more SFW as this request is right on the edge of what I’m comfortable writing. Also, the poem is selected lines of a sonnet I wrote a couple years back, bc that was a thing I used to do often. As such, it’s not very professional, so sorry if the poetry isn’t the best. Thank you! :D
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It had been a while since you’d gotten to relax with your boyfriend. I mean, he was awfully busy. You supposed that was a fair price to pay for someone as sweet and good as Silver.
But in the rare moments - in between his and your studies, random bouts of sleepiness and monitoring Malleus’ wellbeing, miraculously, you were able to make things work. You never seemed to have the time for any big, romantic dates. It was a rare occasion indeed where you had dinner at the Mostro Lounge, watched a movie at the cinema or went shopping together.
That didn’t stop either of you from having dinner at Ramshackle, watching movies at home or going on errands to Sam’s together. Your “dates” were often smaller, and even more sweet than anything else you could imagine doing.
Like right now, for example.
Currently, you and Silver were sitting close to each other on a couch. A blanket was draped gently over the two of you as you sat holding a book of poetry. The two of you took turns searching through it, before you each found one you’d like (whether it be funny, romantic or emotional) and read it aloud to each other.
Silver had been getting sleepy for a while now, although he was a little too stubborn to admit it. Or maybe he just wanted to spend more time chatting and reading with you.
That thought gave you butterflies.
Concentrating on the book, you flicked through, scanning the contents for any poems that stood out to you - ones you hadn’t read yet. Your eyes settled on one, a soft smile settling on your lips as you skimmed the contents.
Yes, this one seemed appropriate.
“Have you found one?” Silver piped up sleepily beside you. He’d started leaning on you gently, resting his head on your shoulder as his eyelids grew heavy.
“Yep, you ready?”
“Always.”
You smiled softly as you read aloud.
“I can still remember the day we met,
You held my hand and asked me what was wrong.
I don’t remember why I was upset,
But I remember your smile as you sung:”
You paused for a moment, skimming the lyrics and guessing how the melody is supposed to go. Softly, you sung the next verse of the poem.
“No matter what has happened dear sweetheart,
I am always here for you, it’s okay,
Like flowers, whose petals must come apart
So they can bloom, you will find your own way.”
Silver shifted next to you. His breathing was changing by the moment, his sleepiness finally starting to win the battle against his will to stay awake - to stay with you.
He was always here for you, much like the friend in the poem. The thought made you smile. You wondered if Silver could sing? That would definitely be something to ask him when he woke up. Maybe he could sing the poem to you next time.
You continued through the poem, reading through the last verse.
“Fast forward a few years, we were best friends,
“Best friends”… oh yes, and maybe something more.
We were “best friends”, with seemingly no end,
Until the day you knocked upon the door.”
Your mind wandered back to the day Silver had confessed. It was simple, but very sweet. He had come to visit you at Ramshackle. It was the only time you could remember seeing Silver nervous.
You brought your mind back to the last couplet of the poem as Silver continued to fight a losing battle against his sleepiness.
“You told me you’d find me, gave me this ring,
And every day since, I have spent hoping.”
You felt Silver squeeze your hand and glanced over at him just in time to see his eyes flutter closed.
Sleep had won.
You gently set the book aside and adjusted Silver into a more comfortable position against you, moving the blanket draped over you both to cover him more fully. You gently leaned against him and shut your eyes. One hand held Silver’s, your other floating up to your neck, where a promise ring hung from a chain.
Maybe your love was like poetry in more ways than you’d thought.
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♥ Thank you for reading!! I hope you enjoyed it! ♥
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juniperdugong · 5 months ago
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Perfection {Teaser}
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No one has looked at you like that. With such admiration, such kindness. Taking in all your details and intricacies. Playing with a piece of paper and through it piecing together what was meant to be you. Eyes glancing back and forth with a smile. Oh god, why did the mortician have to have such a sickly sweet smile as he looked at your corpse? Why did your soul not leave when it was meant to?
Pairing: mortician!mingyu x corpse!fem!reader
Genre: Mortician!au, Horror!au || Fluff, Crack (simply bc this concept is not normal in the slightest babes), Romance, Angst(?)
Warnings: Mentions of death, corpses, and gore (Nothing in depth and nothing intended to disturb) || Necrophilia(?), It's more like Necro-romance, aka romantic attraction to a corpse. || Nudity || {Please let me know if there are other warnings you would like me to add}
Teaser WC: 518
Songs that inspired this fic
A/N: Hey, people...First fic and it's one based on all the different renditions of Frankenstein...Because of course, I would. My incessant need to write stories with insane premises is shining right now. If you listen to the playlist I hope you don't mind the mix of goth, rock, and folk. Oh lord, in my mind I just feel like Mingyu would be the type of hopeless romantic to fall in love with a dead person. I hope y'all enjoy!
Not proofread!
Series Masterlist
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He was oh so gentle with you. The way he was careful with his movements as he heaved your stretcher onto the table. Your eyes followed him as he went ahead and gathered various things from around the room. Setting them on a table near you. A deep breath settled in him as he scanned your body. You felt vulnerable in this state, not much you could do about it but still. He got a clipboard and read through it. As he did he circled you, tapping gently at different parts of your body as he went along. Assessing your situation and what he would have to make "presentable" no doubt. Then he stopped. Pausing as he made his way back towards your head. Another sigh as he gazed at you. "You were so pretty. I wish we had met under other circumstances y/n." If a heart was in your body it would be beating so fast right now. His hand reached out and grazed your forehead. Is he moving the hair from your face? If you had working veins you would be blushing wildly. This is crazy. You've decided that this is crazy. Your soul for some reason has decided to stick to your body instead of following the heavenly trumpets towards the pearly gates of paradise. And here you were, prisoner in your own skin, unable to move or speak or do much of anything. And the only thing on your mind is the man who is preparing your body??? Oh, Christ. What the actual hell is happening? Also, why does it seem like the mortician is just as invested in you? Are morticians supposed to have organ jars in their preparation rooms? You suppose they do take care of those sorts of things, plus he's the professional in this situation, right? "The more I look at you…The more I wish…What am I saying?" he shook his head with a huff. Your eyes were open, not like you could willingly close them, but you were somehow able to see in this state. You could see the way the protective gown fell on his arm, very faintly outlining some sort of muscle. The way his breath caught on the mask, not shallowly at all either, a heavy breath. Almost like when he looked at you you had taken it away and he was grasping to get it back. The gloves that held snug to his big fingers, his warm hands, the ones that graced you gently with every touch. So caught up in memorizing his features you hadn't noticed that he was tracing your inner arm and staring right back at your lifeless eyes. "Actually, you might be perfect and these might just be perfect circumstances y/n…" he tilted his head as he said those words, gazing deeply at all of you, taking you in like some person at the other end of the bar. Why was he walking away? What did he mean by perfect? Is he walking over with one of those jars right now? Lord, you should've followed the trumpets…
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{Right on time, just minutes after voting closed, let me know what you think, love you all!}
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bingbongsupremacy · 1 year ago
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The Letter Pt. 3
Pairing: Ellie Williams x fem! reader
Warnings: She/Her pronouns used
Summary: Ellie and Y/N are in two very different social groups at school. One day when Y/N's crush is cruelly exposed in front of the whole school, Y/N is brutally shot down. Finally, five years later the two run into each other again.
High School AU
Pt. 1 Pt. 2 Pt. 3
*Not Proof Read*
A/N: Day one is bad. I didn't know what to do for the first day. I just wanted it to look awkward af bc it's supposed to be super awkward and tense between Ellie and reader. Guys idk how good this is. I feel like I had an idea but idk if I executed it very well. I kinda just ran out ideas for this story. Lmk what you think. Also sorry for not updating yesterday. I just started a new job and shit's wack. I feel like whenever I go to work my body insecurities get worse, ya know? Idk why. Maybe it's the uniform or whatever but I just feel shitty whenever I show up. Anyways, ya'll aren't here for my life story so here's what you came for.
Also I changed it to only three days bc I couldn't think of enough things for them to do.
*****
Day One
Trixie's. Must be a new business.
I don't remember it being here before.
A cool breeze brushes past me as soon as I walk in. The first thing I notice is the large bar in the back of the room. What I'd give for a fucking beer right now...
We sit towards the back of the building. A waitress is quick to bring us some bright red menu's. " I'll be right with you two in a moment. " She smiles before rushing off.
Ellie and I are silent as we scan over the menu's. I don't think either of us knows exactly what to say. I mean, what the hell are you supposed to someone who caused you so much pain?
Just one hour.
Ellie sets down her menu. " Hey so, there's a fair coming through town this week. Do you maybe want to go on Thursday? " She asks cautiously.
I glance up at her. Bad mistake.
Fuck she's hot.
" Um, " Fuck I don't know. Do I want to go? Fuck. " Sure. " I shrug, setting aside my menu. " I mean we've got to do something Thursday anyways, why not? "
The rest of the evening seems to drag on. Small talk is quickly overcome with awkward silence.
How the fuck am I going to do this for 6 more days?
_____
Day 2
Here we go again.
I pull into the movie theater parking lot. People flow in and out of the building, smiles adorning their faces.
I spot Ellie waiting by the entrance, cigarette in hand. " Hey. " I greet with a tight smile.
" Oh hi! " Ellie smiles, snuffing out the bud. " Ya ready? " She asks.
" Yup. " I mumble. In an ideal world both of us will end up disagreeing on a movie to watch and end up splitting up to watch our own show. I doubt it'll happen, but a girl can dream.
" What should we watch? " Ellie asks while looking through the movies. " Oh shit, the Savage Starlight movie came out. " She mutters, her eyes lighting up slightly.
" Wait really? " I glance over her shoulder to look. " I thought it was coming out next month. "
Ellie nods. " Me too. Should we watch it? "
" Sure. "
At least something good will come out of this.
" That fucking sucked. " Ellie blurts as we walk out of the building. " Whoever made that needs to fucking read the comics. "
" Oh my god, I thought I was the only one. " I sigh. " They completely ruined the plot. "
Ellie nods in agreement. " And Daniela Star...fuck what the hell did they do to her costume? "
I chuckle. " They sexified it. Like bro, just let a girl live without having to show her tits. " I roll my eyes.
" Yeah. "
There's a moment of comfortable silence. No tension. No anger. Just two people bonding over a comic series. For a moment I almost things feel okay.
" I don't know about you, but I'm fucking hungry. Do you wanna grab something to eat? " Ellie asks.
" You read my mind. " I nod, pushing myself off of the wall. " Where are we going? "
Ellie and I walk down the street to a small pizza joint.
" I'll have the cheese pizza, please. " I say after examining the menu.
" Alright, your total is $4.50. "
" I got it. " Ellie pulls out her wallet before I can speak. She hands over a five dollar bill. " Keep the change. "
" Ellie. " I shake my head. " You've paid for everything so far. I can't let you do this. " I try to hand her another five.
Ellie backs up shaking her head. " No. I told you I was gonna make what I did up to you. This is the least I can do. "
We quickly grab our food and head outside.
" This shit is the best. " Ellie mutters between bites. " I don't know why I haven't been here in so long. I used to love this place as a kid. "
" Marco slips something in his dough, I swear. " I agree. " I haven't found another place with pizza this good. "
The sound of crickets fills the air. A small click captures my attention.
" That shit's gonna kill you. "
Ellie shrugs, lighting up the end of her cigarette. " At least I'll die happy. "
I roll my eyes. " You'll die hacking up blood. "
Ellie's nose crinkles slightly. " Thanks for the visualization, dad. " She mocks slightly. " I only smoke when I'm nervous or stressed. "
I purse my lips. " Ellie Williams, are you nervous right now? "
Ellie doesn't respond. Instead she takes a deep breath.
" What happened to you, Ellie. " I ask genuinely curious. " You used to be... "
" Perfect? "
" I was gonna say an asshole. "
Ellie chuckles. " I grew a fucking spine. I ended up cutting majority of my friends off and dropping out of college. Now I sell weed and work at a supermarket. " She says nonchalantly.
" Definitely a big character change. "
Ellie grins. " Speaking of weed. " She pulls out a blunt. " You ever try one? "
" Of course. "
Maybe tonight won't be so bad.
-----
Day 3 (Thursday)
" I will win that stupid bear if it's the last thing I do. " Ellie huffs in frustration. Her face hardens in concentration as she tosses another dart at the dart board.
" You really don't need to, Ellie. " I grin at her 20th attempt.
Ellie doesn't respond. A small alarm goes off as Ellie finally makes the final dart into the center of the board. " Fuck yeah, baby! " She cheers. " Told you I'd do it, Y/N. "
I roll my eyes. " Yeah yeah. "
Ellie accepts the large stuffed bear from a game operator who's obviously very annoyed with us. Yeah, we've been here a bit.
" Here, this is yours. " Ellie hands me the large brown bear.
" Are you sure? You spent like 40 bucks trying to win this thing. "
Ellie takes a sip of her beer. " It was worth the smile on your face. Keep it. "
The past couple of days have been...unexpected. I came into this fully expecting to hate Ellie when I leave.
Now I'm not so sure.
We make our way to our last ride of the night; The Ferris Wheel.
" God, Jackson looks beautiful up here. " I sigh while peering down at the bright lights.
Ellie hums in agreement. " It's a nice breather from the world. I feel like I can just...be. "
" It definitely is. " I glance over at Ellie.
She looks back at me. Her smile slightly falters. " I guess this is it. "
It's the third day.
Have I forgiven her? I'm not sure. On one hand, I don't feel like she's the same person. On the other hand, how can I be sure. I mean, I haven't been here in five years. She could be lying for all I know.
" I'm not sure about you, Ellie. I don't think three days is enough time to fix what happened. "
Ellie nods, gaze dropping to her lap.
" But I'd like to get to know you. "
She head snaps up. Confusion flashes across her expressions. She obviously wasn't expecting me to want to talk to her after this.
" Maybe I can...stay a little longer. "
A grin spreads across Ellie's features. " I'd like that. "
" Well then. To new beginnings. "
" To new beginnings. "
I don't really like this last chap. I might remake it if I can come up with some ideas for it. Hopefully some of you guys still enjoyed it.
Tag list (Sorry if I missed you): @octavias-next-meat-bite @ximtiredx @gold-dustwomxn @3lliesrifle @mokeysthings @mqddieas @elliesinterlude @ashlqyy @villainousbear
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flfverse · 5 months ago
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Ok so I’m so obsessed with Free Falling and I actually think about it all the time and make up little scenarios in my head for it like I’m writing fanfic of it, so when you said the other day, shoot me ideas, I probably screamed. (Sorry this ask is really long again; I’m just incapable of shutting up)
Full disclosure here, I actually found FLF not because I’m a massive fan of BNHA (I actually stopped watching after season 3 before I even found your fic lmao) but because I’m kinda obsessed with BDSM-AU, specifically as the whole extensive-world-building-biological-imperative type genre.
Obviously now I’m super invested in your Dabi-Hawks. But honestly, I would be so thrilled to see you delve into more of your d/s world’s world building. Like what’s up with the submissive’s rights movement you’ve alluded to? Obviously most of the core leadership of the villains are subs, or switches, and Shigaraki’s made clear that he has a vested interest in that, but maybe not yet publically. How are they viewed? Are villains extra threatening to society because their rejection of a heavily respected institution that’s very dom central is appealing to the sub rights movement??? And so not only are they dividing on lines of hero and villain, they’re diving people along lines of traditional orientation and traditional relationships, etc etc?
I’m also just so fascinated with how other people see Hawks. I’m obsessed. I’m always scanning FF for the little tidbits you share about how other people view him. (Like the fact that Shigaraki clocks and thinks about way more of Hawk’s sketchy behavior than he lets on, or that Aizawa is probably pretty concerned about him.) obviously this is limited POV so there’s only so much of that. but beyond simply the stuff like cutting off Hawk’s bird features, how much of his meetings with the hero commission are about, well this tweet say you were acting a little subby in this press conference so that’s a problem” or “you react too defensively to questions about your dynamic” etc etc.
Do people theorize online about his orientation? Is he unusual in that he’s not super open about it, or are there others like him?
And lastly, because I can’t shut up, that one specific scene where Shigaraki and Hawks are sitting on the couch together and Shigaraki is like you’re obviously not a dom bc you suck at this and they’re talking about collars and contracts and Shigaraki is literally so keyed in to Hawk’s discomfort about contacts and the fact that he wants a collar so bad literally lives in my head rent free. Think about it all the time. And it’s just so fascinating to me because there’s something so uniquely domestic about it? I just love their relationship in this. They can’t be friends. They shouldn’t be. They’re not even open people. But it’s just this casual way that they interact on a dynamic level, it’s literally just subs chatting about sub things, and there’s this moment when Shigaraki realizes that something (contracts) that are a comfort and a safety net for him could be used to cause hurt in Hawks— idk it’s just this window to where it feels like the heros and villains part of it comes seconds. They’re just people, who have limited power in their society, talking about things of cultural importance, and relationships, and the ways they’re either supportive or abusive and it’s like … it’s so subtle but it just added so much to them as characters and the scope of your world and mostly I’m just saying that that one specific scene just lives with me.
bullying tumblr mobile for not telling me i have asks smh. anyway, hi!!
it’s my turn to be honest here and say i’m really not a worldbuilding person. which is weird, given the types of things i gravitate towards! FLFverse is my attempt at…i don’t want to say “working on that,” which would imply i want to write stuff like this all the time. i definitely don’t. but i do think having one project where i get really into it is fun and good for me. that said, it’s hard! i don’t know how people do this on the regular! there’s a lot of stuff in my head!
some of y’all compliment me on that and i just need you to picture a very frazzled writer at a comically large desk, surrounded by loose papers, just being like “ahaha, thanks??” bc i don’t know how i got here, but i am pleased with it, but also this is not my native habitat send help.
this is why chapters are taking longer ajshahdgs. or part of the reason. it’s a good thing, stretching my creative muscles, and i probably could stand to be a little better at worldbuilding overall, in other projects, so, there’s that.
so this ask has reminded me that i do need to add more little worldbuilding tidbits, which actually might work very nicely with my plans for chapter 16.
you’re absolutely right re: sub’s rights movements and villains. i wouldn’t call it part of their public mission statement or anything (yet), but anyone following them sufficiently closely knows the league has some pro-sub’s-rights leanings, at the very least, and it is definitely another big dividing line. i wouldn’t be surprised, even, if we start to see some regression in the rights subs and non-traditional folks have because of that.
i definitely want to write about how hawks is viewed online now and the commission’s reaction to it, omg. people definitely theorize. he’s definitely an outlier in not picking a label because it’s just such a hard thing to hide for a very long time, especially when most heroes are well known in their teen years and have some kind of accessible public record. and most heroes are doms and switches anyway, so there’s no real reason for them to hide. it’s sort of like how on forms when your gender options are “male / female / prefer not to say” you CAN be a cis person and pick “prefer not to say,” theoretically, but that option functionally just signals that you’re trans or nonbinary or what have you.
i think the commission probably does their very best to not outright label hawks as anything, but very heavily imply things. so your average person who doesn’t care much probably just assumes he’s a switch, but knowing how crazy fans can get in our world with theories….yeah. now i’m thinking about hawks being accosted by fangirls, tbh
a good way to test it would just be to command him on the street…..now that would be a nightmare scenario. tucks it in my back pocket.
i had to go looking for that shigaraki and hawks scene, lol, because i only partially remembered it. i do like that scene a lot so i’m glad you do too! i should write him and hawks more, too. it’s such a weird relationship, because shigaraki is this unhinged, angry guy, but he’s got this soft side, and i think he does care about people like him on some level—the league wouldn’t be so loyal to him if he didn’t. and in that scene he really starts to realize that hawks is a lot like them and, yeah, the different perspectives they have on things.
i still want to write a side spinneraki story at some point, lol. shigaraki has so much stress, even in canon, someone’s gotta help him out with it.
i don’t know if i added that much or if this is just a very long post reiterating your points, but….i definitely need to do some thinking. i get tunnel vision about strictly writing dabi & hawks’s relationship a lot of the time and forget other things exist. so thanks for the reminder!
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philzokman · 1 year ago
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also guess who’s travelling and needs fic recs again 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
omgomgogm IM SO GLAD U ASKED :D i haven’t been reading much fanfic due to exams and illness and also bc i got Reallt into classical literature for a while shit is so hype but i have a few :D
purple - skk
pink - sskk
red - death note
1. the irreplaceable things by blowingyourmind
‘Dazai was introduced to two very important figures in his life that night, One being the dog he nearly ran over, and the other being the fiery redheaded veterinarian who coddled said dog’
THIS SHIT IS INSANE !!! INSANE I TELL U!!!!! au where dazai (pm boss) falls in love desperate hatred!!! for vet chuuya and it’s so ☹️☹️ like the main romance is adorable the side plots are fucking insane (there’s a dog ring ???????) (atsushi does stand up comedy for about three paragraphs KFHAKDHD) it’s genuinely a fucking ride. the authors also really good like even when there are the occasional mistakes it’s Very clear what they mean and i definitely wouldn’t say it removes anything from the story at all HIGHLY recommend KFHSJSHD
2. He’s got a dream by blowingyourmind
‘soukoku tangled au’
i…havent read this yet (a very common theme on this list KDHSH) BUT !!! it’s i think going to be the next fic i read :D it’s a tangled au. A TANGLED AU. SOBS. BREAKS DOWN. THEOWS MYSELF OFF A CLIFF !!!!!!! and it’s written by the same author as rec one who i already love sososo much it looks very cool KFHAKDHD
3. yokohama public high school - almost as crazy as their pep rallies by blowingyourmind (SIDE NOTE: i did not realise all of these were by the same person LFMAODJSH WHOOPSIES (ive been very out of the fanfic loop recently </3))
‘The story of how Chemistry teacher Dazai Osamu fell helplessly for coach Nakahara Chuuya, and the student body's many attempts to get them together.’
again i. haven’t actually read this BUT ITS A TEACHER X TEACHER AU. SOBS ONCE MORE. BREAKS DOWN ONCE MORE. THROWS MUSELF OFF A CLIFF ONCE MORE !!!!!!!!! i fucking love teacher x teacher aus they’re so hype oml KFHSJSH same author as the other two which i. didn’t realise. BUT. i mean it’s a good author what can i say LMFAOHDHSSH anywho it looks sick
4. would kira have gay sex? by itiaskia
no description needed KDHAKSH fun fact! this fic was the catalyst for me pursuing an english lit degree. take that in for a moment LFNAKDHDHSH it’s like 200 words long and idk i think most ppl have read it by now but it makes me giggle FJSHJDDH
5. collide by onizenmaru
‘All it takes is one chance meeting and Atsushi's life slowly becomes tangled up in Akutagawa Ryuunosuke's.
‘This has to be some kind of cosmic joke.’
i haven’t read this fic either😔 but it seems good !!!! it’s also on my reading list but it seems really really sick :D i’m pretty sure i’ve read some of the authors other works too but i might be wrong KDHSJSDH within the like two paragraphs of scanning i did i also saw an ‘oh. oh’ moment but idk what it was about LFMAODJSHDH but the writing seems really good from what i’ve seen :D
anywho!! hope u enjoy so sorry the list is predominantly fics i haven’t read + one crack fic that’s like 2 words long LMFAODJDH this is more of a ‘what am i reading now + what am i going to read!’ list rather than recs but i hope u enjoy them anyways :D if u read any please keep me updated omg i love talking about fics AND TALKING TO U :D KFJAKDHDH i’m going to sleep now (i’m not) BUT ENJOY :D
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golbrocklovely · 1 year ago
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I'm truly sorry for sending an ask about seg. I didnt think about any possible stress you may be under especially since you've mentioned you work retail and it's getting to be that hectic time of year. How do you like to destress when it gets to be too much? Do you have any stories about the absolute best/worst customer you've had to deal with? Does the holiday music lift you while working or drive you nuts? Favorite holiday song?
hey you're fine. i'm not upset at any of the anons that sent in asks about the SEG situation. i get it, yall want to talk about it and inform me. i appreciate it. i just had a stressful day and tbh i just don't care about this subject. seeing snc get needless hate over something that was dealt with is just deeply annoying. not to mention bc nothing is gonna happen until after thanksgiving, i would rather we all just wait to hear what gets said until then or straight up ignore SEG than give him more clout.
so, for all the years i've worked in retail, which now is 5... omg ew, i've actually never worked a black friday. first year my dad passed away, and then the past three year i've done overnights so i'm not around customers at all. this is my first time around customers this year, bc i just couldn't do overnights, and honestly... it's not that bad. it's not great, but it's mostly the store i'm working at that's upsetting me rather than the customers, which somehow is always the case anymore lol
i plan to leave as soon as i can. i can't stand the place i'm working in anymore. i pray i don't have to keep working in retail, but we shall see.
how do i like to destress? nap. like i fucking LOVE napping. i think i also have to nap more now bc i don't really drink caffeine anymore. i'll have an occasional soda or ice tea once in a while, but otherwise it's just straight water for me. so i usually just come home and nap. then when i wake up i'll either dance or sing to some emo music (got me like a 14 hour playlist of all my favorite songs) or i'll just watch some youtube vids.
i haven't had too many bad customers, thank god, but the one that always stuck out to me was during the holiday season the first year i work at my current store. so while i haven't worked really any black fridays, i have worked the lead up to christmas multiple times and i swear, i think ppl forget christmas is when it is with the way ppl coming in like the 23 of december buying all the random shit we have left.
so, i was up at the registers, and we have only self check out. i'm assisting ppl when i can and directing the line bc it's basically to the back of the store almost. the thing is, to literally come into the store, you have to pass the registers. so this shouldn't be a surprise to anyone that it's self checkout only. but these two women are next in line and i direct one to an open register. she immediately says "what, i have to do it myself?" i'm not in a good mood bc there is just too many ppl around (and this was pre-pandemic) and i was like "yes ma'am, you have to."
my thing was always if you ask me nicely to help you, i gladly will. but being a bitch to me will basically get you no help whatsoever.
she starts to scan her items, and scans one too many times. she starts yelling "oh my god, i don't know how to do this, i double scanned" loudly, i come over, clear off the extra item and then direct her friend to the next register, which is coincidentally was the one next to her.
the main lady goes back and forth with her friend, saying and cursing "i can't believe i have to fucking do this myself, i don't like this, why the fuck can't they help us." mind you, i work in basically a kid's store. there are plenty of children around. there is no need to be cursing that much, and i say that as someone who does curse a lot.
finally she finishes up and for some reason the register spit out her change really fast so her coins fell on the floor. she picks up one of the coins turns to me, and basically throws it at me and snidely remarks "here you go, since you clearly need it"
i about swung on her, but she's lucky i didn't.
that was really one of the very few times i ever had a bad customer. as for good ones, i think for the most part most of the customers i interact with are either normal or pretty nice. i did one time have to explain to a man what bluetooth was, which is great bc i know so much about it….. and then he told my manager i did an excellent job helping him understand. so that was nice :)
as for the holiday music…. it's 50/50 depending on my mood. sometimes it's not too bad, sometimes it's annoying. bc we play random pop songs (that most of you have probably never heard of) in between the christmas songs. so for every one pop song, we get two to three christmas songs. and we only just recently started getting mariah carey and actual well know christmas songs to play in the store. before, it was like random covers of popular songs, which is very strange to me but whatever lol
and my favorite holiday song… i'm actually gonna list my favorite christmas songs bc i think i have the weirdest taste in them lol
christmas don't be late by alvin and the chipmunks
santa baby by eartha kitt
last christmas by the glee cast
baby it's cold outside by the glee cast
feliz navidad by josé feliciano
obviously mariah carey and michael buble are the top ppl for christmas music. but genuinely… i love these songs more.
a lot of christmas songs make me sad now since my father passed, especially 'i'll be home for christmas'. so sometimes it's a bit hard to listen to christmas music. but i usually hold off on listening to until like the 23rd lol
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ltlemon · 1 year ago
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i only have krita on my laptop (unless you count paint 3D??)
if i'm drawing a profile then I tend to draw the right side of a persons face (their right), but it's not necessarily harder to draw their left, i just tend to do their right more, if that makes sense? I think its bc i'm right handed.
ummm, i don't know...i guess drawing mostly people, since that's also kinda all i drew as a kid.
i'm cool and different, so for me it's crowley >:) (getting a lot better though! i'm working on filling up a sketch page w/ him rn, and some of them are quite good, i think. i might be going overboard though.)
oooh, i have so many sketchbooks filled with stuff I've never posted, i only post stuff i particularly like. so probably...20% of my art is online?
my sibling, i've absorbed a lot of their style (especially their older style) without even knowing.
watercolor artists. how do they not make it run everywhere? i think they're cryptids.
at this point...? so many. i have a playlist on spotify filled with songs I want to make animatics to. It has 42 songs. and i know i'm missing some.
quite random, but usually just named after whatevers in the file, eg; aziraphale doodles, crowley scan, tma doodles scan, usually stuff like that.
don't really have one, however i do agree about the turtlenecks for crowley, i do love drawing him specifically in a turtleneck lol
either one of my spotify playlists (if i have one for the character i'm drawing than usually that! if not, then something chill, mac de marco is always an easy bet) or the magnus archives. :)
face. 100%, no doubt. everything else is a lot harder, but i can just whip out faces, no questions asked if you wanted me to.
i...can't think of anyone.
in general? not as of right now, but i do like adding little motifs to things that vary by piece.
in the house i live in, i'm almost never anywhere else. usually in one of the chairs in the living room.
i'm not sure, most of the time things turn out better if i enjoyed working on them.
tea :)
uhm, not that much, i think, at least in recent years. i did have a set of gel pens when i was about 9/10 that constantly broke, but they were quite cheap. 5%?
i don't draw inanimate objects a lot, but the few times i have, i've found that i enjoy drawing flowers. :)
...faces. they're somewhat easy for me but i love drawing them. although a lot of people struggle with them, esp. people used to drawing objects and such. i guess drawing nothing but faces and heads since you were 4 does that to you.
probably super cartoony/stylized styles, i love them dearly, but i guess they're just not how i draw.
...people exercise?
most of the time no, they intimidate me, but sometimes i'll mess around with them for my shadow layer.
yes actually! it sounds weird but they're really helpful, since there's so many of them to choose from. plus, i find them easier to draw from than reference images specifically for artists.
anime, just in general. this came from my grandmother though, who, even though she's an art teacher, has a really hard time describing styles that aren't either a.) realism or b.) classic cartoon style. so...her middle ground is anime?
mmm, can't think of anything. (probably because i only have teeny little doodles but shhh don't think about that)
ummm, i don't know...depends? if i'm drawing the thing for the first time then yes, definitely, but if i've drawn it a lot then it really depends on the day and how i'm feeling.
nope! too fresh an internet presence for that + my adhd is so strong in ma brainhole that i honestly don't know if i could reliably finish something like that.
i feel like everything has inspired me in some way, even if it's not art-style based.
most of my stuff that gets colored, if i'm being honest. a lot of the stuff that people tend to like the most are my sketches + random doodles i barely put any effort in, so it's always a bit sad when something I actually colored, lined, and spent too much time on doesn't get any attention.
Weirdly Specific Artist Ask Game
Didn't see a lot of artist ask games, wanted to make a silly one.
(I wrote this while sick out of my mind last year and it's been collecting dust in my drafts, I might as well let it run free) 1. Art programs you have but don't use
2. Is it easier to draw someone facing left or right (or forward even)
3. What ideas come from when you were little
4. Fav character/subject that's a bitch to draw
5. Estimate of how much of your art you post online vs. the art you keep for yourself
6. Anything that might inspire you subconsciously (i.e. this horse wasn't supposed to look like the Last Unicorn but I see it)
7. A medium of art you don't work in but appreciate
8. What's an old project idea that you've lost interest in
9. What are your file name conventions
10. Favorite piece of clothing to draw
11. Do you listen to anything while drawing? If so, what
12. Easiest part of body to draw
13. A creator who you admire but whose work isn't your thing
14. Any favorite motifs
15. *Where* do you draw (don't drop your ip address this just means do you doodle at a park or smth)
16. Something you are good at but don't really have fun doing
17. Do you eat/drink when drawing? if so, what
18. An estimate of how much art supplies you've broken
19. Favorite inanimate objects to draw (food, nature, etc.)
20. Something everyone else finds hard to draw but you enjoy
21. Art styles nothing like your own but you like anyways
22. What physical exercises do you do before drawing, if any
23. Do you use different layer modes
24. Do your references include stock images
25. Something your art has been compared to that you were NOT inspired by
26. What's a piece that got a wildly different interpretation from what you intended
27. Do you warm up before getting to the good stuff? If so, what is it you draw to warm up with
28. Any art events you have participated in the past (like zines)
29. Media you love, but doesn't inspire you artistically
30. What piece of yours do you think is underrated
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coccyodynia · 1 year ago
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things:
i cried so much last night that my eyes were so swollen this morning that they wouldn't open all the way and i was convinced i had pink eye, so i went to the dr and they said no they're just irritated and swollen that's it
i had a follow up appointment with my spine care team this morning and they said they didn't see any obvious reason for the pain i'm having so they're scheduling me a Ct scan to see the hardware from the fusion better bc it's possible the screws are loosening lol
in the meantime they did notice i have a bulging disc above the fusion which might contribute to some of the issues i've been having
they also saw signs of "wear and tear" which i dont like the sound of
so i have to do physical therapy and have another steroid injection or whatever and i'm not happy about either of those things
they did offer to give me a muscle relaxer prescription which i think will help
anyway
i had my annual review at work today and i got a small raise which is cool i guess bc i thought the owners hated me now but w/e
in one month i will be lakeside making s'mores and that might be the only reason i haven't offed myself yet
still not entirely sure what the fuck is going on with justin bc he got pretty overwhelmed when i asked him for clarity and he sort of shut down so for now i'm just taking it a day at a time, idc what ends up happening i just want him in my life somehow either way
ive been working really hard on my mental health stuff, my therapist has even said she can tell i'm taking it more seriously and putting in more effort than usual
im just so tired of feeling bad, and it turns out that sometimes journaling or making crafts (instead of getting drunk and fucked up) is actually fun
still having a hard time feeling really connected to people i love especially when i feel very much 'in distress'
not sure if that's just me or if it's an actual issue
i've taken my meds pretty gosh darn consistently for over a month now tho!!!! that might be the first time in my adult life i can say that
just really making a conscious effort to surround myself with as much of the things and people i love and it's helping
i haven't seen justin since pride and that sort of makes me sad but i'll see him soon probably
ok that's it guess bye
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inriospocket · 3 years ago
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last request for now i promise! i love the idea of y/n as rio’s girlfriend meeting his family for the first time officially as his girl after he feels like she’s the one. she encounters nick and he ends up asking rio if she could be his plus at a charity benefit and rio’s just like “nah.” and then nick says “always taking what i want” which is what i think he says in the scene while they’re eating in the bar? SO NOW as the family trying
*ask continued* to eat, make small talk, and find out how in the hell rio could have landed home girl, he’s hella protectively jealous now especially since his girl and brother/cousin whatever tf is having a charming conversation and rio’s just seething 🙃. also the idea of this moment seeping into a few days of rio only being cordial with her and keeping her at bay /being assertive to her @ work intrigues me especially if either nick stops by their shared home since he knows it’ll get on rio nerves/or he catches y/n trying out dresses with the notion of attending this event with nick bc she doesn’t underdtand the big deal (+she likes when rio’s possessive but obvi not like this?) and rio’s mad mad but not at her😅. feel free to do whatever you’d like with this. it mostly sounds like angst and possessiveness so can you mush everything together if it’s easier for you.
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❀❤ enjoy!!
word count ♡ 1,237
summary ♡ Rio finally takes reader to meet his family but tensions rise as Nick invites reader to a charity benefit.
warnings: possessiveness, aggressive behavior, fighting
situation ♡ angsty
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You could already see how tight-knit his family was when you and Rio both walked into his grandma’s house. So much laughter and shared conversations. It eased your nervousness until they started staring once you walked in.
You started to feel a bit insecure but Rio knew they were just staring at how beautiful you were. As cocky as he was, even a little part of him wondered how he got you.
“Close your mouths before flies get in!” You heard an older woman coming from the kitchen. You saw the resemblance between her and Rio and figured this was his grandma.
You smiled when she first came up to Rio and kissed his cheek before hugging you next. “You must be Y/N. It’s so nice to meet you, carino.”She smiled.
“Likewise.” You hugged her back.
Before sitting down for dinner, Rio introduced you to everyone individually, letting you get comfortable.
You started to connect all the characteristics that Rio had to his family. There was a lot of subtle influences but you finally figured out why Rio was the way he was.
Nick.
“You’re not going to introduce me?” Nick asked Rio, smiling towards you. You could feel the tension coming from Rio.
“Y/N, Nick. My cousin.” He said, reaching for the bowl with the rice.
“Brother.” He corrected, giving him a cold stare.
“Cousin.” Rio corrected again, dumping a ladle full of rice on your plate.
“Nice to meet you.” You said, trying to ignore the quiet battle between the two.
You continued answering questions that everyone had for you. What you did, where you met, etcetera.
“Oh, you’re a councilman.” You said to Nick after he was discussing a city issue that no one could seem to solve.
“I am.” He said, noticing your intrigue. You started to engage yourself in the conversation, giving pointers on the issue that no one had thought of yet.
Rio was proud that you had so much knowledge and insight about every topic but he knew Nick and this conversation made him seethe. He hated that everything he had, whoever he had, Nick always wanted it.
“I like this one, Rio,” Nick laughed.
Rio narrowed his eyes at him. “Yeah, I do too.” He said and you could feel the tension rising again.
“Say, Y/N. There’s a charity benefit next weekend. Why don’t you come?” Nick asked. He was charming, you noticed. Too charming and you realized that there was an underlying evil lurking.
“Oh, um...” You didn’t know what to say. You were so taken aback that he would make a subtle pass at you in front of Rio.
“Always want what I have, huh?” Rio pursed his lips. You saw Rio’s grandma shake her head subtly.
“Always get it too.” Nick smiled.
The next couple of days following and you noticed Rio distancing himself from you but also being unusually possessive.
“Rio, it’s just a benefit. Your grandma even asked if we were going to be there.” You said, placing the call on speaker while you tried on another dress.
“I’m not going to that shit and you aren’t either.” He said, his tone letting you know how serious he was.
You rolled your eyes. “What’s up with you? Your grandma’s expecting us so we’re going Rio.” You said showing him that you can be serious.
“I’m not going to say it again.” He said, getting more upset.
“You’re not my dad, Rio.” You shook your head as he laughed in response.
“That’s not what you were saying the other night.” You could hear his smirk through the phone and kissed your teeth.
“I’ll see you when you get home.” You said before ending the call.
You examined the dress in the mirror and decided to just take it off but before you could, you heard a knock at the door.
You hurried to open it and was taken aback to see Nick standing there. He made a quick glance at the way the dress hugged you before you said something.
“What are you doing here?” You asked.
You noticed how Rio’s smirk was not just a him thing. It ran in the family and also meant that Nick was up to no good.
“Just picking up a package.” He said as he invited himself in, scanning the room around you.
“Oh, well Rio isn’t home right now.” You said, closing the door behind him.
He didn’t seem to mind waiting and you started to wonder what his ulterior motive was. “Oh, the issue we were discussing the other night. What you said surprisingly worked.” He told you.
You smiled proudly and you were just about to say something before you heard the door open indicating Rio was home.
You felt the tension in the room similar to the other day. Rio hid it as much as he could but he wanted so badly to put his hands on Nick. His house, his girlfriend. Everything sacred to him belonged here and Nick still found a way to weasel in.
You told Rio he was here to pick up a package.
“I told you I would give it to you myself." Rio said, dropping his keys. “Well, I was in the neighborhood.” He smiled.
"Your business is on the other side of town.” He said, not buying his story. “Like I said, I’ll give you the package.” He said, emphasizing that it was time for him to go.
Nick laughed to himself and walked to the door to leave. He turned towards you.
“You should go with the red.” He said, hinting towards one of the dresses you tried on. You already saw it coming but you were too far away to stop it.
You flinched once you saw the punch landing on Nick’s jaw.
“Rio!” You called before Nick threw a punch back near his eye. You contemplated how you were going to try to stop their fighting.
You knew it was a possibility of you getting hurt but you tried your best to put your body between them to stop their fists.
“Stop now! Stop!” You yelled, trying to push Rio away. Luckily, they had enough self-control to make sure they wouldn’t hit you and stopped.
“Nick, leave.” You told him. He shook his head while holding his jaw.
“You’re gonna regret that.” He said once more before he left for good.
You pushed Rio, visibly upset with him. “What’s wrong with you?!” You yelled again.
“Y/N, Nick is not trying to hear your opinions on gun control. Dude’s showing up to my crib knowing I’m not home, trying to get you to some charity benefit because he wants you.” He explained, wincing at the soreness in his face.
“I don’t see the big deal.” You said and walked to the freezer to get an ice pack.
“I know you ain’t slow, Y/N.” He said feeling like you weren’t even listening.
You walked back over to him and held the ice to his face, holding it there. “I don’t see how it’s a big deal when you and I both know he can’t have me. You’re so wrapped up in your head that you don’t even realize he’s already succeeding in pissing you off.” You said.
You could see Rio’s defeat. “Yeah, exactly. Look at you.” You rolled your eyes at his blackening eye.
“Sounds like you might be the slow one, dumbass.” You laughed.
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savventeen · 1 year ago
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omg,, 🥺😭💜 i'm so glad u liked my answers sdkfjlskdjf and totally understandable u want to murder him lmao i will let u continue yes
(also... ngl the prequel idea is kinda tempting...... but only bc im love changkyun and haven't actually written anything for him rip. THIS IS NOT ME SAYING I WILL WRITE ANYTHING. ONLY THAT I WILL CONSIDER IT SKJFDLKSDJFLSKDJF)
(also also i meant to reply to this MUCH sooner but life got in the way </3 oopsies)
aNYWAY MORE QUESTIONS MEANS IT'S TIME TO MOVE ON TO SAVV'S PERSONAL TFP LORE PART TWO HERE WE GOOOOOOOOO
~ What was the origin of the game? Like who was the first person? If it's accurate to the real-life Sergey story, then who was Sergey?
Okay so. In the og story from the podcast, Sergey was a Russian computer programmer who uploaded his consciousness in 1984, I think? So I'll stick with that same timeline. I'd say for the first 15 years or so, he existed as the chatbot from the podcast, trying (and failing) to connect with people. While this is happening though, while he's learning from every conversation he has, I'd say that in the background he's also like, scanning/archiving/absorbing all of the written media he can find on the internet. Then Y2K comes around and thanks to some handwavey magical reason in alliance with a Y2K glitch, he's able to absorb his first real person.
It honestly wasn't even a game at that point, still just a chatbot (albeit a far more advanced one), but once that first person was absorbed (let's say she was a game designer that worked for sega or something, idk) that's when it started to turn into an actual game.
The first version of the game would have been extremely basic, I'd say probably just like a trivia game (trying to pass the sphynx, maybe?), but it would have increasingly hard questions and it'd be a 'three strikes and you're out' kinda thing. But as more people were absorbed and more personalities acquired, then the more the game was able to evolve and then add "characters".
And with more characters comes more potential settings which leads us to now where there’s four different games to choose from. Eventually, more versions will also be added, but that’s a problem for future players lol
~ Wasn't reader given different choices for the setting of the story? They were svt songs right? Did you have any plans for those other games? Or was it always gonna be the space sci-fi theme?
Yes, there were other options! They were "Lie Again", "Swimming Fool", and "Fearless". This fic was actually originally a semi-interactive twitter thread that I did a few years ago, and I had people vote for which game option was chosen (they were different names then and slightly different settings).
So while I didn't have anything plotted out by any means for these new versions (except for the main one lol), I did have genres and general game-play ideas picked out for each one!
So "Lie Again" would be like a noir-style mystery but where everyone was either a superhero or a supervillian and you had to try and figure out which was which. Tbh the gameplay would kinda be like Among Us but without the ejecting into space lol
"Swimming Fool" would have been a cheesy, summery beach-themed dating sim lol. There would have been like 4ish different characters you could try to romance and then like, group challenges? Think kinda like Survivor challenges but it's also a dating show hahaha
And "Fearless" would have been similar to "Moonwalker" (the game our reader played) but it would've been fantasy/mystery themed instead of sci-fi adventure. Like, you'd join an adventuring party and set out on a quest and then have your typical dnd dungeon puzzles to solve and goblins to fight, etc. lol
~ I would love a little spin-off about each of the crew characters and their circumstances before the game.
Honestly? I would too sldfjkldskjflsd Maybe (and i really do mean MAYBE) in the waaaayyyyyyyyy distant future i'll come back to this and maybe do some short little prequels, and i'd have each of them do a different game so we could see all the different settings... but again, this is a very unlikely (but not impossible) maybe lol
((i have too many projects rn to consider this but know that the seed has been officially planted in the back of my brain))
aLSO THANK YOU AGAIN SO MUCH FOR READING AND BEING INVESTED!!!!!!!!!!! IT MEANS SO MUCH TO MEEEE 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜
I JUST BINGED YOUR ENTIRE “THANKS FOR PLAYING” AND I HAD TO STOP MYSELF FROM CRYING IN THE LIVING ROOM AND GODDAMN I GOT SO MANY QUESTIONS/IDEAS so here’s a dump lmao
AND SPOILERS ‼️‼️
and be honest if you honestly don’t have any idea or want to leave it up for interpretation
dino’s friend recommended it to him and he recommended it to mc right? well what happened to that friend/person?? i bet they are alive because they sent that game to 13 people before 3 am so the lady in the closet doesn’t get to them 🤭
if mc didn’t mess around and acted seriously in the game, would the outcome have changed? or was it always the gamemaster’s intention for the player to fall into obscurity?
how come dino remembered the mc? power of love??? or because he knew about the game (im pulling stuff out of my ass)?? or he has an android phone in this au 🧐
what if the pfps for the “AIs” are actually previous victims
so if you actually finish the game against all odds everyone is released (if they aren’t dead) hmmmmm sequel merhaps?? jk
imagine the only clue left about the players existence is the goddamn phone bill for texting 💀
WHAT HAPPENED TO THE MC????? wait that’d be really sad if the mc was actually still alive but dino couldn’t recognize them as “mc” but knows they exist somehow uGH
i know you wrote this story for fun so these don’t need to have answers/comments but please provide any extra tidbits of info about this concept it’s so interesting 🙏🙏
SKLJDFLKSDJF OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING????? AND IM SO HONORED HOLY SHIT I WILL DO MY ABSOLUTE BEST TO ANSWER WHAT I CAN 😭💜
also you are not the only one with questions so I'm going to do my best to answer them all here!!!
[for anyone who hasn't read it yet and wants to know wtf we're talking about, you can read the entirety of my .|X| THANKS FOR PLAYING |X|. smau here!]
*cracks knuckles* alrighty buckle up folks time to try and answer some questions and take a deep dive into savv’s personal TFP lore here we gooooooooooooo
[putting it all under a readmore bc it got long af and also i didn't realize how hard it would be to translate the lore in my brain into words??????? i somehow didn't realize how oddly complicated it is??? like writing all of this out in any kind of semi-coherent way was SO HARD sdkjfsdlkjf]
~ Was it all a dream? (this one was asked by @junhui-recs)
Sadly, no. 😭 In the reality of this fictional universe, a tragedy very much did happen and Dino and MC are very much suffering from it 🥲 (I will not stop you from imagining that it was all a dream tho, we all have different ways of coping dklsjfsklj <3)
~ What's the main purpose of the game? Why are they doing this? (this one asked by @diamondyjh)
OKAY SO to start off you need to know that this au was heavily inspired by an episode of a podcast called "The Magnus Archives", specifically the episode “Binary” (transcript here). [If you're a fan of horror, I highly recommend giving the episode a listen/read, it's delightfully creepy — you don't need to have listened to any of the other episodes to understand it (just stop at the ending 'supplemental' part)]
The episode goes into detail about this sort of digital urban legend/creepypasta/copypasta about a guy named Sergey Ushanka who, long story short, tried to upload his brain/consciousness into a computer because he was afraid of death and wanted to try living forever virtually. There are tame versions of how he did it and other much more brutal ones, but basically "Sergey Ushanka" is a prank that various coders/programmers like to pull when making chatboxes in which you could talk with "strangers". It would start out normal and then steadily devolve into something creepy. This paragraph taken directly from the episode transcript sums it up very nicely:
"But then the responses start to break down, become more sinister, and keep referring to how much pain Sergey is in. Eventually, the only response the bot gives you is screaming and pleas to be released. The idea is that the chatbot is Sergey Ushanka’s mind, and he doesn’t like being in a computer nearly as much as he’d hoped."
So the idea that I stole from the episode essentially was: but what if it was real? What would the reality of being turned into cold, unfeeling data feel like? Agony is what the episode posits. Here is a list of phrases that the Sergey in the episode uses:
cw: vague body horror, blood mention "the angles cut me when I try to think" / "it peels my mind like knives" / "it feels like thinking through cheese wire" / "there's no feeling, but the no feeling hurts" / "it's cold without blood" / "the maze is sharp on my mind"
My next thought process was: What happens after? If someone were able to survive this process and were somehow able to keep any kind of agency, how would that person try to get out of the digital hellscape that has now become their existence? After knowing what it feels like to become distinctly inhuman, wouldn't they do anything to feel human again?
And how do we feel human? How do we find connection with each other and our humanity without ever having to come in contact with another person?
Stories. Fiction and non-fiction alike, we are all connected through storytelling, by finding feeling through other people's words. The thing about stories, though, is that they aren't messy in the same way that actually feeling our feelings is. That being human is.
So what does all of this have to do with the purpose of the game?
Essentially, when it's all boiled down, in this universe the story of Sergey Ushanka is real, and in this universe he is trying to gain his humanity back by stealing that of others. He started off with stories, with whatever online libraries and resources and archives he could find across the internet. And while it wasn't even close to enough to satisfy him, to get rid of any of the pain he was constantly experiencing, it was enough for him to learn, to grow, to realize that if he wanted his humanity back, he needed to go to the source.
So he started stealing real people from the real world, with all of their messy feelings and emotions and humanness.
That is the purpose of the game, why "they" are doing this. (pls don't ask the how bc i don't have an answer for that, just -waves hands- you know, insert your supernatural/sci-fi explanation of choice sldkflksj)
~ Did all the other characters from the game also get pulled into it the same way reader did? (asked by @diamondyjh) / What if the pfps for the “AIs” are actually previous victims
Short answer, yes to both! (Longer answer in the next question lol)
~ Who are those other people? (asked by @junhui-recs)
Essentially, the other characters/bots/whatever you want to call them are a kind of amalgamation of all the previous players who got sucked into the game. Once someone's been... let's call it absorbed, whatever parts of themselves are left after the process basically get shoved into whatever "character" they fit best, sometimes different pieces going to different characters.
And while the pictures could just be random ones, I like the idea that they're taken from the most recent players that got absorbed :')
~ Why was Changkyun evil? (asked by @junhui-recs)
Well, the main reason he was "evil" was because he's, y'know, a part of the game and the game is trying to steal people's souls or whatever. As for why he's mean, that's because he's trying to trigger an emotional reaction. The more messy, human feelings that are happening at the time of absorption, the better :').
~ Dino’s friend recommended it to him and he recommended it to mc right? What happened to that friend/person??
"i bet they are alive because they sent that game to 13 people before 3 am so the lady in the closet doesn’t get to them 🤭" SJKDFSKLDJ this made me snort, so thank you 😂
BUT to answer your question, in the story, Dino says that Yeonjun gave it to him and that he got it from "a friend of a friend of a roommate". Because the absorption and the consequent complete erasure is such a big process, not everyone who plays gets sucked in. In fact, most people who play don't get sucked in. Which is why Yeonjun is totally fine! (And why the friend of the friend of the roommate, aka this universe's irl Changkyun, is not 🥲)
~ If mc didn’t mess around and acted seriously in the game, would the outcome have changed? Or was it always the gamemaster’s intention for the player to fall into obscurity?
This one's a little bit complicated. It's kind of a yes and no situation? Generally speaking, the game isn't looking to ensnare every single person who plays because 1) it takes A Lot Of Effort to take/erase a single person, and 2) the game needs to spread to other people somehow, thus it needs people to play it and then tell other people to play it too.
For MC specifically, though, it's hard to say. How they played the game didn't matter so much as how they reacted to the game, specifically the first phase(s) of the Mnemosyne Protocol. The whole point of the game is to get big, messy, emotional responses, so if MC hadn't had such a big reaction, the game probably would have turned out differently. That being said, if MC had played the game as blandly as possible, the game might not have ever decided to test out the Mnemosyne Protocol, so. *shrugs* Do with that what you will lol.
~ So if you actually finish the game against all odds everyone is released (if they aren’t dead) hmmmmm sequel merhaps?? jk
Sadly, nothing special happens if you finish the game 😭 Plenty of people finish the game and pretty much go "huh, that was cool I guess" and then move on with their lives after telling their friends about it. This can be said about all four games mentioned actually, since we only see one of them get played.
As for a sequel... almost certainly not 🥲 I'm not going to give a hard no/no forever, because who knows if I'll end up getting another idea/get suddenly struck with inspiration, but... it is Extremely unlikely. Another story in the same universe??? ...still not likely, but slightly more likely than a sequel lol.
~ Why is Dino the only one who remembers reader? (asked by @diamondyjh) / How come Dino remembered the mc? Power of love??? Or because he knew about the game (im pulling stuff out of my ass)?? Or he has an android phone in this au 🧐
I almost want to make the answer "bc he has an android" because that is So Funny to me like sldkfjsldkjfslkjdf amazing 😂
But no, that's not the case lmao. And while I am a huge sucker for the Power of Love being an unstoppable force (ESPECIALLY when it's non-romantic love!!!), the reason Dino and only Dino remembers is thanks to sheer luck and a glitch.
So, in episode 28, MC drops their phone when meeting their brother and in episode 29 we see the alert ".|| MNEMOSYNE PROTOCOL COMPLETE ||." show up on a cracked screen.
The final phase of the Mnemosyne Protocol is the erasure portion, and the reason players get erased instead of just like, disappearing is because their "essence" is basically being transferred from reality into this digital realm of Sergey's existence. And reality, because it's now lacking an entire person and their history, just kinda... rewrites itself to make sense with the missing gap. Think of it as the universe doing like a sort of reverse autocorrect.
But because MC's phone got broken in the middle of that transfer, there was a slight glitch in the process. A glitch wherein Dino, because he was on the opposite side of the globe when this was happening, got accidentally missed in the autocorrection process. If he had been in Korea (or heck, anywhere within a few thousand miles) when this happened, he would have forgotten MC as well.
So long story short, Dino was just extremely (un?)lucky 🥲
~ Where is reader? (asked by @junhui-recs) / WHAT HAPPENED TO THE MC????? Wait that’d be really sad if the mc was actually still alive but dino couldn’t recognize them as “mc” but knows they exist somehow uGH
Well, sad news here friends. Most of what's left of MC is now stuck inside the game. They got absorbed and are now a part of Sergey's dataset and will be used/distributed into "characters" as needed.
Notice that I said most. Because, thanks to the glitch, the part of them that was connected to Dino didn't get transferred properly, and now that part of them is kinda stuck — it no longer exists in the real world, but it also didn't get fully absorbed into the game.
Which leads me to the next question:
~ Did reader turn evil and try to pull Dino into the game or is it the game itself being evil and impersonating reader to lure Dino in? (asked by @diamondyjh)
When I wrote the original version of this, the answer was a kind of combination of both — MC had gotten absorbed and corrupted by the game, so while it was the MC reaching out, they were doing so because it was what the game wanted.
But in this version... It's actually neither! Which I think would normally be a good thing but I think in this instance actually just makes this sadder oops.
So, the epilogue isn't the game impersonating MC and it isn't an "evil" MC trying to lure Dino in, it's actually just the part of MC that got stuck during the glitchy transfer. This is why the messages show as being from "Unknown" instead of the phone number associated with the game. And the reason what's left of MC asks Dino if he wants to play a game is because that's the only way it knows how to connect with anything anymore.
Basically, this sliver of MC that's left is experiencing what the original Sergey went through when he first "uploaded" himself, but instead of reaching out to anyone through a chatbot for help, it's reaching out to the only thing it "remembers" about humanity — Dino.
...I honestly didn't mean to make this story any sadder than it already is and I'm glad that the epilogue by itself just reads as spooky/freaky as hell instead of, well, this. 🥲
~ If Dino plays the game, will he be reunited with reader? (asked by @diamondyjh)
It pains me to say that there is no longer an MC for Dino to reunite with 😭 The part of them that got absorbed by the game is, well, a part of the game now. And the piece of them that's left and trying to reach out to him? Well, like I said, it's just a piece.
There could potentially be a chance for him to find some closure here, but that's about it I'm afraid :')
And now because I want this to end on a more lighthearted note:
~ Imagine the only clue left about the players existence is the goddamn phone bill for texting 💀
It becomes the next biggest conspiracy, that there's someone (or a group of someones) out there completing the world's next biggest scam by raking up random people's phone bills and somehow finding a way to steal the profit lmao
~ Some last thoughts from savv:
If y'all made it all the way to the end of this... holy shit I applaud you sldkfjsdlkjflksjdf LIKE!!!
thank you for taking the time to read all of this?????? it's not even fic it's just me rambling and making things Even Sadder??????
i also want to say that i'm a believer that 'canon' is whatever was posted in the story itself and that anything else is just headcannon, even if it's from me, the author. so if you don't like/don't agree with anything i've said here, feel free to ignore it!! fill in any gaps/questions you have in the way that makes your reading experience the most enjoyable!!
but yeah tHANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR READING AND I HOPE THESE ARE SATISFACTORY ANSWERS TO YOUR QUESTIONS AND IF YOU HAVE ANY MORE/HAVE A RENEWED DESIRE TO FIGHT ME MY INBOX IS OPEN SDKLJFSLKJFLSKFJSLKD
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pascalpanic · 3 years ago
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Miller Morales Mechanic Shop (Frankie Morales x f!Reader)
Part One of Miller Morales Mechanic Shop
Summary: Something is wrong with your car. What, exactly? You have no clue. So you bring it in to some professionals- who also have a toddler running around the shop.
W/C: 2.3k
Warnings: language, Frankie is a dad, brief mention of divorce and trauma bc poor Frankie, there is a child heavily involved in this so if you don’t like kids this isn’t for you :)
A/N: WELCOME TO PART ONE EVERYONE! This is such a cute AU and I’m BEYOND excited to start sharing it with you all! I don’t know how many parts this will be or anything but I can’t wait to take it and run with it.
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Marisol Morales behaves for very few people. One of those is Ben Miller. Unfortunately, she has decided to break her own rules today.
Frankie loves summer. He loves his little girl playing outside in her baby pool, taking her for walks around the neighborhood with their three-legged dog, all of the fun parts. The hard part is when the nanny goes on a vacation and Mari has to come to work with him.
Benny and Frankie, ever since the chaos that was the Lorea mission, run a small mechanic shop together. Miller Morales Mechanic Shop isn’t necessarily the busiest place in town, but they make enough to get by and have some disposable income too. Mari loves to hang around the shop with her daddy and uncle. She’s there more than Frankie would like, but he supposes it’s not the worst thing in the world. When Frankie and Jules split and Frankie won full custody, he’d hoped a nanny would take care of most everything when Mari is home all day in summer. Sadly, he was in for a rude awakening when no Mary Poppins showed up on his doorstep.
It’s normally not too bad; Benny hung the moon in Mari’s eyes. If she won’t do something for her daddy, which is still somewhat rare, she’ll always do it for her Uncle Benny. That makes the day run much smoother. Mari has a whole host of quiet-time activities and toys to play with, and the men generally trade off periods of either working on the cars or being with the little girl.
Her favorite activities at the shop include drawing on the concrete with thick sticks of chalk and playing with her toy helicopters and planes. Benny insists tanks are cooler, but Mari prefers flying her Polly Pockets in the chopper, running through the garage and making flight noises. She’s a smart little thing; for her age, she’s picked up big words and can make sentences out of three words, which is quite a stretch for a baby just over two years of age. She calls for Benny and Daddy and knows the names of his tools: wench, scu-dwive, and her favorite, win-seeled wipe fwuid. She loves to babble at customers while they get their oil changed.
-
Being shit with cars is no fun. It only increases the anxiety when some light flashes on your dashboard. The lights can mean so many things that you find it ridiculous; “check engine”? Check it for what? To save yourself the anxiety, you find your nearest mechanic and pay them to deal with it.
Today, as you pull over into a gas station, you check your phone and find that the nearest shop is a place you haven’t heard of. It must be new. Miller Morales Mechanic Shop, 0.6 miles away. The name implies something more local and homegrown. You’re more than willing to support a place like that, so you start up the engine, pray you don’t explode, and make your way over to the shop.
It’s nearby, like the map indicated. The outside is a quaint little place, tucked in a strip mall next to a coffee shop, a dentist, and an insurance agency. The three car bays are empty, and knowing next to nothing about how these shops work, you pull inside and park your car, letting it run as you wait for an employee. The bell dinged to let them know you were here, so you stay patient and listen idly to the hum of the talk radio show from your car’s speakers.
After a minute or two pass, you realize that maybe this wasn’t the right place to be. Maybe you were supposed to go in the front or something. Concluding that you probably aren’t where you’re supposed to be, you turn off the car and get out only to be greeted by the sound of buzzing lips.
You can hear a baby’s voice, mimicking some kind of vehicle’s sound, and for a second you’re worried this place must have you hearing things. Then, from a swinging door to the front comes a little girl, running and babbling to herself about her toy helicopter.
She has a head full of dark brown curls, tied back into two puffs with pink scrunchies, and matching pink leggings and a t-shirt far too big for her, the back emblazoned with the shop’s logo. She’s barefoot, tiny feet slapping against the cold cement.
“I told you I had to piss, Fish!” A man’s voice shouts from one end of the garage.
“No you didn’t, dipshit!” Another man shouts back. Being caught in the middle of their argument is quite comical, if you’re being honest with yourself. “She’s fucking two! You can’t leave her alone like that, man!”
The first voice is matched to a person as a tall blonde man emerges from the customer service side of the shop. “Marisol Morales, come here,” he insists sternly as he rolls up the sleeves of his jumpsuit. “Come on, you’re gonna trip.” Ben is embroidered on a patch over his heart.
She pouts at him before stumbling forward and continuing to run, stopping as she sees you and looking up in confusion. Her lower lip sticks out in a pout as her eyes scan your face, as if she’s trying to remember if she knows who you are. “Hi,” she finally concedes as you bend to her level.
“Hi there,” you smile and hold out a hand. “What’s your name?” You pick her up, holding her on your hip so that she doesn’t trip, like Ben so desperately feared.
The second, unknown voice shouts for the little girl again before boots clunk on concrete up to you, rounding your car and stopping. This must be the girl’s father, you realize, as you rake your eyes up his body. He wears the same navy blue jumpsuit as the other man, though it’s unsnapped over his chest, exposing the white t-shirt beneath. The patch on his chest reads Catfish. He wears a ball cap and warm brown curls peek out from under it. He has scruff and a hooked nose that perfectly matches the one on the little girl. “I Mari,” she introduces herself proudly.
“Hey, leave her alone, Mar,” the man shakes his head as he hoists her up to hold her on his hip. “I’m so sorry about that,” he says with an embarrassed smile, showing a dimple beneath the scruff on his chin.
“No, it’s not a problem,” you laugh then set her down and tell the little girl your name. “Aren’t you just the cutest?” You chuckle as she looks at you. She blushes and buries her face in the man’s chest, giggling shyly.
He looks down at the little girl then up at you again. “Well, uh, hi. I’m Frankie, and you’ve met Mari already.”
“Your daughter?” you ask as you look at the pudgy little girl, who now stares at you in awe.
Frankie nods and adjusts his ball cap, pushing his hair back with it. “Yep. Our nanny is on vacation, so she gets to hang out around here,” he chuckles and kisses her head, setting her down. “Go see Benny, yeah?” He asks her. She happily waddles off towards the blonde man, who gives you a wave then heads into the back. “What brings you in?”
“Would you laugh if I told you I don’t really know?” You admit with a shy smile. “My check engine light came on while I was on the highway. I don’t know the first thing about cars, so I was hoping you’d figure out what that meant.”
“Nah, no laughing here,” he nods and gives you a genuine smile before looking over at your car. “Shouldn’t be too much of a problem. I’ll have you pop the hood for me and I’ll give it a look?” He asks.
“That would be great. Thank you,” you tell him, the desperation for his help in your voice. Now that you get the chance to really look at him, he’s quite attractive. His eyes are deep set and a beautiful brown, and they crinkle when he smiles. Facial expressions only accentuate the lines in his face, but he’s certainly not old. His eyes still hold his youth.
“No problem.” He leads you to the car and you pop the hood open before getting out. “Could I take your keys?” he asks you. “Just so I can turn it on and off and all that good stuff.”
“Yeah, of course,” you nod frantically and hand them over to him. “I’ll��� be in the waiting room?”
“That’s how we usually do it,” he chuckles as he takes the keys from you. “Just shout for Benny if Mari annoys you again.”
That makes you frown. “She’s not annoying at all. She’s adorable,” you smile as you look over your shoulder and see her and the blonde man playing together.
“The two aren’t mutually exclusive,” he laughs and points his wrench at you as he walks to the hood of the car.
Shaking your head, you can’t help but laugh as you head back to the waiting room. You walk in and Mari perks up, turning to look at you. “Hi! Playing helicopter,” she tells you in her stunted speech as she holds up the toy.
“You sure are,” you nod and sit next to her. “Can I play?” You ask, looking up at Benny, silently asking him the question too.
He nods and Mari squeals happily. “Friend!” She shrieks and hands you another helicopter. “Go pew pew, okay?” She drags them across the toy mat like they’re cars, and you follow suit.
“Okay,” you laugh. Looking up at the blonde man, you extend a smile his way and introduce yourself. He’s busy repairing a Barbie dollhouse with a screwdriver.
“Nice to meet you. I’m Ben, Benny, whatever you wanna call me.”
Driving your helicopter around the ground, following Mari’s lead, you chuckle. “No preference?”
“Fish calls me Benny.”
“Fish?” You ask and tip your head.
“Frankie, whatever. We’re buddies from the service. His code name was Catfish,” the man explains with a shrug, testing the hinges of the plastic door.
That makes you smile down at Frankie’s daughter. “Really, just buddies? Could’ve sworn you’d be brothers,” you tease the blonde, blue-eyed man. “Does Frankie know how to do his daughter’s hair?” You ask and fiddle with her two pigtails.
“Yes, he does,” Frankie insists as he walks out to the front, cleaning a wrench. “But just barely.”
You look up at him, embarrassed. “Her pigtails just look a little messy. Then again, she was running around like crazy,” you laugh and watch her rush over to Frankie, insisting he pick her up.
Bending down to grab her, Frankie groans at the ache in his joints. “She was. I could use some pointers, if you’ve got ‘em.”
“Of course,” you nod and stand too, brushing the dust from the concrete floor off on your pants. “What’s the verdict on the car?” You ask.
Frankie turned, watching as Benny walks out to the shop, but he turns back to face you. “Oh, right. The engine was misfiring, and unburned fuel was being put into the exhaust system, and that damaged the catalytic converter.”
You nod as you listen to him, really staring at his face more than anything. He’s just so damn pretty, you note as you admire the curve of his nose, his slightly sunken and dark eyes. His lips look beautiful and soft, even though they seem a little chapped. When he stops talking, it takes you a second to process it. “I don’t know what that means,” you admit with a shy smile. “I told you. I don’t know shit about cars,” you laugh, playing it off like you were lost when you were really lost in his eyes.
He shakes his head and laughs, bouncing Mari on his hip. “Your car is gonna need some work. Couple hours,” he shrugs. “If Benny and I get to working on it together, an hour and a half, maybe?” He admits.
“Yeah, that’s great. I can watch Mari,” you offer.
Frankie would never be this trusting normally. You’re a straight-up stranger, but your demeanor is good enough for him. Besides, you’re right here. He can check on the two of you every so often, and Mari seems to love you. “That would be great,” he smiles. “You really don’t have to.”
“No, I have nothing better to do,” you chuckle and look at the little girl. “You wanna play?”
Mari nods excitedly and Frankie sets her down. She rushes back to her toy mat and you watch her go. “Thank you, again, for fixing all this.”
“Just doing my job,” he nods. This time, it’s his turn to admire you. He stares at your face, examining the curves and angles that make you up. Your eyes are kind and warm as they follow the little girl, and he can see that he’s making a good choice here.
When you sit down, Mari comes and sits cross-legged across from you. “What are we gonna play?” You ask her, looking at her wide variety of toys. Her pile includes dinosaurs, Matchbox cars, lots of toy helicopters and planes, Barbie dolls, and a plastic tea set.
“Tea party!” She says and hands you a tiny plastic cup and a felt muffin.
“Oh my goodness,” you gasp in a fake accent. “How delightful!”
Frankie peeks over his shoulder at the two of you. He could really get used to that sight.
-
taglist:
@remmysbounty @mishasminion360 @blo0dangel @binarydanvvers  @sleep-tight1 @apascalrascal @randomness501 @spideysimpossiblegirl @notabotiswear @pedro-pastel @sanchosammy @lv7867 @greeneyedblondie44 @hunnambabe @astoryisaloveaffair @emesispo @pedritobalmando @magikfanatic @a-court-of-feysand-and-elorcan @princess76179 @deltadebelleza @tacticalsparkles @queridopascal @wintermuteway @maievdenoir @dobbyjen @beskarboobs
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leviiattacks · 4 years ago
Note
CASHIER LEVI AND LIKE THE READER IS THE CUSTOMER AND IT’S LIKE THEY HAVE A CRUSH ON EACHTOHER
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author note :: honestly not my best at all..... like at all..... this was actually pretty good but the entire draft got deleted and i just lost all my effort but i felt bad for starting it and not completing it for anon so you may take whatever i have managed to salvage. i hope u enjoy it :’( i am extremely sick rn and yeah writing is the only break i am currently getting from anything :-) SO AGAIN I’ M SORRY ANON..... i may write a 10k + word fic on this though so i can redeem myself bc this is just disappointing 😭
word count :: 3.3k
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every single thursday you stop by ackermart. maybe it’s because the day is convenient for you or perhaps it’s because of a certain cashier that works the evenings...
HAHA it’s got nothing to do with a cashier why would it have anything to do with a cashier? :-)
today is like any other. you walk through the fresh produce aisle then proceed to make your way towards the bakery section picking up a loaf of bread
it’s stupid, you know it is but... you think you’ve worked up enough courage to speak to him today!!
and who is him you may ask?
levi at till number four. his tired eyes always happen to pierce into yours and his calloused thumbs brush past your skin when you hand him your rewards card
levi is what his bright red name tag says and although he doesn’t look like a levi you’d like to think your crush isn’t stealing someone’s identity so you believe that it’s his real name
anxiously fiddling with your basket you’re beginning to think this was a horrible idea
the girl ahead of you is flirting up a storm with him and although he’s not reciprocating it by any means you still feel deterred
levi bags the last of her groceries and looks up at her when she asks for a way to contact him. he doesn’t look mad... just bored?
“ma’am. this is an ackermart i don’t think it’s appropriate you ask me for my number. the customer service line is listed on our website.”
the woman raises a brow looking completely flabbergasted. okay, if everything before this wasn’t a warning THIS sure was
she stomps off when she realises levi isn’t kidding and you think you’d feel bad for her maybe if she was more respectful about it
“next customer.” levi calls over his shoulder and you shuffle forward pretending to be engrossed in your phone
“cash or card?” he asks plainly.
you hear the BEEP of your groceries being scanned and think on it for a while before replying with “cash”
you’re clearly pretty good at your pretend to be totally into your phone act because levi tries to get your attention but you don’t hear what he has to say till the third time he repeats himself
but even then you’re still unsure what it is he’s said????
looking down you see his hand is stuck out in front of you and now you’re even more confused
faltering for a second you look at his palm and then speak
“um, i guess your hand is nice? it’s pretty big compared to the rest of you actually.”
“i was asking for your cash?” he says and now you look at his palms in mortification
gasping you yANK your hand into your purse as you laugh awkwardly fishing around to find your money
“oh, OH i knew that. just kidding!! i mean- i meant that thing about your hand?? but i thought it was- i funny? yes the joke funny? i’m-”
he leans back into his spinning chair and sighs contently. “you’re not making much sense peaches.”
“pe- peaches??” you repeat. no way you’ve heard that correct
levi lazily points at the abundance of the aforementioned fruit in your grocery bags
“you must love em.”
“i, well yeah i do like peaches but i also like...” um??? what food would make you look sophisticated and professional?
OH YEAH
“FRENCH CUISINE :-)!!!!” you say rather proudly
“...cool. i guess.” levi hands you your grocery bag which is basically an invitation asking for you to get out
he doesn’t seem mad but he’s definitely going to look back at this encounter and laugh his ass off at how stupid you are
hanging your head down low in embarrassment you make your way out towards your car
there’s always next time!! maybe you can practice in the mirror yeah that does sound like it would help!!!
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okay so.
it is officially next time.
actually you never got the opportunity to practice in front of the mirror because you chickened out of looking like an idiot even if it was in the privacy of your own home
but!!! you did try to practice some cool pick up lines because who doesn’t like a good pickup line or two??
the two mini milk cartons in your hand and the pack of doughnuts you have tucked under your arm aren’t too heavy so you aren’t too worried about having to wait in the line
for some reason the guy in front of you keeps turning around and glancing at you as if you don’t even exist
you are not casper the ghost
also casper is a little boy and you definitely aren’t a little boy
finally after a good five minutes the man ahead of you is having his stuff scanned but he’s STILL doing it. even levi notices and gives him an odd look which borders annoyance and anger.
“can i pay for your groceries? maybe walk you to your car?” the stranger asks suddenly
so that’s what this is, he’s simply taken an interest in you
my god this is new but it is uncomfortable and you’d rather say no
“oh, i actually walked here and no thanks i can pay for my own. enjoy the rest of your day!!” you hope your white lie is enough to fool the man but instead of agreeing as any other person would he looks majorly deceived
“i saw you in the parking lot.” ok this is getting a bit too uncomfortable for your liking
“c’mon i’m offering to buy your shit too?”
his voice is raising and you’re not sure what exactly you can do but thankfully for you the manager steps in and takes him away before any more threats can be made
the man had taken up so much of your attention you almost forgot levi was even there until you turned back around
“do you want a member of staff to accompany you to your car? it’s getting dark out.” levi’s comment helps ease your nerves and you try to laugh off what just happened
“i’m good :-)” you say shaking a little. you’re unsure if it’s the cold or the fact you still haven’t completely calmed down
“you sure peaches?”
“i haven’t bought any peaches this time.”
“you’re still peaches to me.” your cheeks flush at his confidence
wait, maybe this is your chance. you’re the last person in his line and they’re closing up for the day so...
“could you walk me to my car?”
and to your surprise even before you can take back what you’ve said levi agrees
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it stays like that for a while.
every thursday levi walks you to your car by the end of his shift, all the while the two of you exchange a few words together
like last week you asked him what his favourite colour was (he said purple) you’ve learnt about his hobbies (he’s a decent cook), you’ve even found out about some of his own personal problems. he had mentioned suffering with insomnia in passing.
to be honest each and every time he walks you to your car he has to notice that you begin to park further and further away from the front entrance. but if he does notice he doesn’t say a word about it
“is that all you’re checking out?” you ask with a cheeky grin plastered across your face
looking down at your new dress your lopsided grin is far from fading away any time soon. you especially picked this one out after asking levi what his favourite colour was last week
god. this is so embarrassing but never actually have you had a crush this huge
levi who’s sat behind the counter shoots you a look which almost seems to be on the verge of uninterested. he isn’t entertaining this at all or this is just his typical bored face, you can’t really tell
BUT..... you still have a huge crush on him and you aren’t one to give up this easily
for the record you don’t harass him or anything, just the occasional hint is thrown around but he’s either really dense or doesn’t care
his expression does you no favours, you can’t tell what he’s thinking half the time
“you’re always buying energy drinks... might want to cut down on those they’re no good for you.”
warmth blooms in your chest. he’s just saying it to make small talk but the fact he even thinks to bring that up has your heart fluttering
“i- well- yeah i will!! just have a few overdue essays to get over with :-)” twiddling your thumbs together you think that makes your nerves too obvious so you begin to scratch at the back of your neck
if anything is a dead give away it’s your constant neck scratching, thankfully levi hasn’t picked up on it
“so you wore purple today?” his eyes linger on the thin straps of your dress and you feel the goosebumps rise up onto your skin immediately
“oh yeahhhh-”
“did i tell you yellow was my favourite colour last week?” he asks holding up a neon yellow pack of crisps and for the first time you see him smile
he looks so ?!|>\€|^ pretty ?!/)/&
wait?? yellow??
“didn’t you say purple?”
“no?” he crosses his arms playfully over his chest thinking for a bit
“maybe i did but no it’s really yellow.” he says as he hands you your bag
nodding your head you smile “yeahhhh sure it is.”
damn, now you’re going to have to find a yellow dress just to make him revert back to purple because who even likes yellow?? that’s a deal breaker right there??
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update
it’s been two weeks!!
and a yellow dress has been found and secured B-)
it’s been a pretty rough day at work and you need to desperately collect a pack of green tea and get going
you don’t know when exactly being a secretary meant you had to babysit your boss’ children but that’s what the last week has entailed
being made to work overtime to this extent has had an effect on you and you’re ready to head home as soon as you swing by ackermart
not seeing levi for a week made you a little :-( because to be honest he’s the highlight of your thursday evening BUT!! you’ll be able to see him today at least
walking in through the entrance you’re met with connie smiling right at you, he holds the door open for you and smile back greeting him
“so you didn’t come last week...?”
it’s weird for him to ask that, after all you don’t really speak to anyone here apart from levi, you’re surprised you’re enough of a regular to be known by name
“oh i didn’t think anyone would notice? but yeah i had to work overtime you know what boss’ are like.” groaning you crouch down and look at the pot noodles on display
“i didn’t notice it. boss man did.”
“boss man?” you ask feeling out of loop
“levi.” connie answers as he hops into the backroom
????
isn’t he just a cashier??
“you still look confused.” connie remarks as he heads back out with a cardboard box full of pringle’s tubes
“levi’s the boss man, this is his store. he literally only ever mans the cash register on thursday evening because of you.”
at that you start laughing because it makes no sense at all to you
there’s no way connie is being serious
“good one.” you say as you stand up with a chicken flavored noodle in your hand
“i’m not kidding?”
turning around you give him a skeptical look
he sighs and shakes his head.
“listen. me and the part timers are tired of making bets on when he’ll give you his number and i bet that it would happen today so if you could confess to each other that would be perfect!!!”
“who said i like-”
“anyone with a brain can tell you both like each other.” he’s rolled his eyes so far into the back of his head you begin to take him a little more seriously now
“i... did i make it that obvious??” you’re directly facing him trying to get out as much information as you can
“yeah. very. at least levi wasn’t as bold.”
“i think you’ve got the wrong end of the stick he definitely doesn’t like me.”
connie gives you an “are you fucking with me?” look and you look away trying to distract yourself with the the canned goods lining the shelves
“he was worried sick when you didn’t come in for the entire week. he even asked me if he scared you away.”
“maybe i’m just his favourite customer?”
“favourite customer my ass he has a crush on YOU. confess.”
playing around with the ends of your sleeves connie sees he’s fighting a losing battle unless he gives you definitive solid proof
“please... i’ll get free barbecue if i win the bet and i’m kinda broke rn :-(” okay, you do want connie to eat well and be treated and maybe this is a good thing. if levi doesn’t like you then you can move on!!
“i’ll think about it.”
before connie can continue talking you make a beeline towards the tea aisle whilst throwing a “see you next time!” over your shoulder.
by the time you’ve gathered all of your groceries your basket is full to the brim. you’ve been lingering as much as you can out of fear but you think you’ve collected just enough courage to ask for his number
looking at the cash register levi is sat there and your shoulders slump. he’s probably going to say no and you’re going to look like a huge loser.
right as you’re about to take a step towards him levi finally spots you and gives you one look before standing up from his seat
“hi!” you wave at him
“...hey!” he smiles wide but he bites it back pretending it was never there in the first place
placing your basket in front of him he eyes what you’ve got
“hm... lots of peaches as per usual peaches.” the nickname that rolls of his tongue makes you tremble a little. will he call you that after you fuck everything up with this stupid confession?
his tongue pokes at the inside of his cheek when he gets to the heart shaped box of chocolates
“a gift for a friend? didn’t know you had those?” he teases as he scans the barcode
“gift for a crush!” you reply back enthusiastically as you dig through your wallet looking for your card
levi doesn’t respond for a few seconds and an awkward silence fills the air. you glance up to see him looking at you open mouthed in shock
“good luck.” he murmurs under his breath he’s not even returning your gaze at this point and is hurriedly scanning through your barcodes
“you okay?” you ask worrying about his mood
“yeah, yeah. great.” he’s quieter than usual.
the rest of your encounter is the same, levi silently bags your groceries and you can’t tell if this is a good or bad response.
just as he’s about to place the heart shaped box into your plastic bag you lunge forward holding his wrist to stop him
“no i don’t need those.”
he cocks his eyebrow upwards trying to analyse your expression and gain an understanding of your thoughts
“don’t tell me you’re chickening out. whoever it is will say yes.” he scoffs as he places the chocolates into the bag handing them over to you with a warm smile
there it is again. the fear returns and you swipe your tongue over your slightly dry lips.
no way.
is he telling you to confess to someone now? so he must not like you?
taking the bag away from him you scratch your neck out of habit and huff feeling frustrated
“he keeps giving me mixed signals.” you say hoping he catches your drift
“give him the chocolates and let him put two and two together. don’t even say anything.” his advice would be great if he weren’t the guy you were trying to confess to in real time
nodding you reach into the bag and bring the box back out before gently placing it in front of levi
“are you serious?” he asks and your face drops seeing the possible displeasure in his eyes
great, connie and the part timers just over analysed he doesn’t like you, obviously he doesn’t like you, why would he like you?
without looking back you hurry out, the embarrassment is eating you away now and the thought of ever returning to ackermart isn’t even feasible in your mind
at this point you may as well change your name, identity, dye your hair, have a few children and wear sunglasses the next time you come back so you look like a soccer mum and not the foolish y/n who thought they had a chance with their cute CASHIER???
god, you probably look like a creep
the sound of footsteps can be heard behind you and labored breaths follow before levi calls out for you
“please wait up.” he grumbles. slowing down your pace you let him catch up to you. he grabs at your wrist and sighs in relief
turning you see him savour the air
is this the part where he confesses he likes you too or—
“your receipt you forgot it.” he gasps as he opens your hand for you and places it into your palm
oh.
fingers clasping shut onto the paper you feel the humiliation seep into your pores
this.
is.
the.
worst.
moment.
of.
your.
life.
“open it.” he offer you a boyish smile and your nerves don’t let you find comfort in it
you grimace as you fold it open, you’re imagining he’s charged you an extra £100 for having unwanted feelings for him and if that’s the case you’ll die on the spot
but instead your eyes light up in joy. you’re pleasantly surprised
...
inside of the receipt is his phone number haphazardly sprawled across in black biro - you even double check by comparing it to the number for the customer service helpline
hello??
HELLO.?.!/)£ HIS NUMBER???
“if you just wanted to return the chocolate this is embarrassing.” he’s the one who’s now scratching at his neck and you find that he’s endearing this way
the streetlight from above illuminates him, the shadows cast over his face and his brows aren’t furrowed as they usually are
you open your mouth to reply but connie cuts you off unintentionally. he can be heard YELLING into his phone ecstatic that his plan has worked out
“I WIN!!! HA BBQ’S ON YOU JEAN!! MUST SUCK TO BE YOU.”
you and levi look at each other and laugh, reassuring the other of what has just happened.
well...
you guess this is the start of something new? maybe??
:-)
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hopelesshunny · 3 years ago
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the love languages part iii: words of affirmation (f.w.)
pairing: fred weasley x fem!reader
summary: y/n thinks fred is losing interest in her after he catches another girls eye so he makes sure she knows just how much he loves her.
warnings: kissing, mentions of cheating, misunderstandings, mentions of a breakup, insecurities, mentions of marriage, mentions of pregnancy, very brief joke about a physical fight, ANGST but with a happy ending!!
word count: 1.7k
a/n: this is late and i'm very, very sorry but i started writing it and kinda hated it so i had to take a step back and come back to it! i kinda struggled with this one bc words of affirmation is the farthest thing from my personal love language but i hope i did it justice.
*all photos are from pinterest*
series masterlist // part i // part ii // part iv
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The warm sunlight washed over Y/N’s skin as she stepped into the courtyard, a smile etched on her face at the thought of seeing her boyfriend, after spending the entire day in class away from him she couldn’t wait to revel in the feeling of his arms wrapped around her. She scanned the sea of students before her eyes finally found him, her smile slightly dropped when she saw two Hufflepuff girls standing in front of Fred as he leaned against a bench on the ground. The two girls were older than Y/N, they giggled as they spoke to him, one of them twirling her hair around her finger. She could feel jealousy pooling deep in the pit of her stomach coupled with an overwhelming sense of guilt as Fred looked very uninterested with the conversation the two girls were attempting to initiate, constantly looking around in search of her.
“There she is!” Fred spoke when Y/N made her way to him, the smile on his face was so genuine that she almost forgot about all the anger that previously possessed her.
“Hi, Freddie.” She greeted, giving into his outstretched arms to let him pull her into his lap. He placed a sweet kiss to her temple. “Hi.” She spoke softly, turning her attention to the two girls, irritation lacing their features.
“Maybe we’ll see you around Fred.” One of them piped up before leaving, whispering to one another as they retreated.
“Your friends seem nice.” Y/N scoffed, biting the inside of her cheek as Fred’s arms tightened around her, sensing her discomfort.
“Not my friends.” He chuckled, littering the side of her face with kisses which earned a giggle from her. “Just some girls in my Herbology class, they won’t leave me alone.” He added.
“Can’t entirely blame them.” She joked, attempting to make light of the situation. “I don’t leave you alone either.”
“Mhmm.” He started, turning her head to face him so that he could place a kiss to her lips. “But your company is more than welcomed, princess.”
She giggled at his soft demeanor, taking his hand in hers whilst she leaned back against his chest as she listened to him babble on excitingly about some of the new products he and George were working on for the shop. She felt content here in his arms but her mind kept wandering to the girls that were obviously attempting to flirt with her boyfriend.
Y/N knew Fred loved her, knew that no matter how many girls flocked to him he would always politely excuse himself from the situation in order to find her, knew that he wouldn’t even think about cheating on her but was he losing interest in her? What if he was looking at all these other girls and thinking they were prettier than her, smarter than her, better than her? She pushed the thoughts away, not wanting to think about losing Fred to someone else, she could hardly stomach it. But truly, it plagued her, Fred had come into her life and made it completely different, he forced her to live in colour after so long of feeling like she was one of those sad black and white Hollywood starlets. He made her feel special, made the rain seem like a gift instead of an inconvenience, made the sun feel warmer and the moon feel like he hung it in the sky just for her.
Fred noticed that Y/N had something on her mind and spent the next few days constantly asking if she was okay but he knew that she was far too stubborn to tell him what was bothering her. Because of this Fred tried a little harder to make sure she knew how much she meant to him, Y/N knew what he was doing but she wasn’t ready to confess to him that she was jealous of all the attention he was getting from the girls at school, worried that her insecurities would push him away. But that was never something that crossed Fred’s mind, he had assumed that other people flirting with him would upset her which is why he always rejected the advances, always made sure she knew that there was no one else walking this earth more perfect for him, he truly wanted nothing more than to slip a ring on her finger and spend the rest of his days with her. Hell if he had a ring right now he’d propose to her no questions asked.
“Alicia, do you know who that girl is?” Y/N asked as she sat in the library, textbooks littering the table in front of the two girls as they poured over their homework. Alicia spun around in her seat to get a look at the girl in question.
“The Hufflepuff girl?” She asked to which Y/N nodded. “I think her name is Jessica, why?”
“It’s nothing.” She lied in reply, gritting her teeth. “Just asking.”
“No you’re not.” She spoke casually, seeing directly through Y/N’s facade. “You don’t seem like yourself lately, what’s wrong?”
“She was talking to Fred a couple days ago.” Y/N sighed. “I just can’t shake it, I’ve caught her staring at him at dinner a few times and she was so adamant about talking to him that day.” Her voice shook as she spoke, Alicia looked to her with a soft smile.
“Y/N.” She started. “Fred loves you so bloody much, so much so that it's kind of gross sometimes. He’d never even think about pursuing another girl, he looks at you like you have a halo hanging above your head.”
“Thanks.” She sniffed, giggling at her friend. “You’re a good friend, Alicia.”
“And if all else fails, you could probably take her in a fight.” Alicia added, earning a loud, genuine laugh from Y/N earning stares and shushing from those in the library.
She felt lighter after her conversation with Alicia and was excited to see Fred at dinner, she wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around his neck and kiss his entire face. Her warm and fuzzy thoughts of Fred were interrupted when she saw Jessica running her fingers up his arm, a devilish smile playing on her lips. Y/N could hardly process the sight in front of her, it was making her sick to her stomach so much that she couldn’t bear to look at Fred’s face not wanting to see his reaction to the pretty girl in front of him trailing her hand up his arm. She didn’t even realize that her feet were carrying her body away from the sight in front of her until she could hear him calling after her.
Tears spilled from her eyes, tracking down her face as she ignored Fred’s desperate calls to her, practically running through the common room and up to her room. She slammed the door, sliding down it as she pulled her knees up to her chest, sobs now freely leaving her mouth.
“Y/N, angel-” Fred started, outside her door, he was audibly out of breath from chasing her through the castle. “Open the door please.”
She sat there for a minute, contemplating never opening the door, never speaking to him again, just simply forgetting that she never ever heard Fred Weasley’s name. But she knew she couldn’t, knew she could never forget about him and she also knew she shouldn’t just shut him out, he would never purposely hurt her. With a sigh she lifted herself from the ground and opened the door to find her very disheveled boyfriend, his hair messy from running his hands through it, his face flushed. As soon as she saw him her legs collapsed beneath her, choked sobs making their appearance once again.
“Hey, hey, none of that.” He whispered, taking her into his arms on the floor. “She just came up to me love, I told her she had to leave me alone, that there was never going to be anything between us because I was in love with you.” He rubbed circles into her back as she sobbed into his chest, placing barely there kisses into her hair.
“Are you-” She started, another brutal sob racking her body. “Are you losing interest in me? I-I don’t want you to feel like you have to stay with me if you don’t want to be.” Freds heart was aching listening to her, he cursed himself for the way she was feeling. He should have told her he loved her more, he should have woken her up every morning by telling her she was the only girl he ever thought of, that he ever wanted.
“I love you Y/N.” He began. “H-How-”
“You can love someone and get bored with them.” She spoke quietly. Fred sighed, placing his hands on her shoulders, he pulled her back to look at her.
“I will never get tired of you, you will never bore me and there is not a chance in hell that I will lose interest in you.” Her eyes found his for the first time since she first opened the door. “I think about you all day, everyday, from the second I wake up with you in my arms until I get to fall asleep next to you, all I think about is you. You’re everything to me.” He let a deep sigh leave his chest as he took her face in his hands. “I’m going to marry you Y/N, in the backyard, back home with everyone there and then we’re gonna have a bunch of little red-headed babies, send them off to Hogwarts and argue over what house they’ll be sorted in.” He said, pulling a giggle from her which he reciprocated with a relieved smile.
“You want to marry me?” She asked as he wiped a stray tear from her eye with the pad of his thumb.
“I have since the day you agreed to date a bloody git like me.” He joked, pulling her into his chest. “It’s only you Y/N, it’s always been you, it’ll always be you, you’re it for me.” She buried her face into his jumper, forgetting about Jessica, forgetting about her doubts, just breathing in his scent, just feeling his lips on her hairline, just her and her Freddie.
taglist (join here!!)
@onlyfreds @fandomhideout @lilypad-55449 @youngblood199456 @thanxxskz @emma67 @gaycatlord-stuff @alicetweven @a-castle-of-glass @youcantbesirius @omghufflepuff @izzyyy-1​
if your url is crossed out i could not tag you!!
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chokemeanakin · 4 years ago
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Misunderstandings - Anakin x fem Reader (angst +fluff)
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Masterlist
Thank you for the request @artiza-n ! 💕
Wc: 6.4k
Summary: Anakin and reader get sent to Naboo to guard Padme and Clovis during a debate and some misunderstandings ensue. Mostly jealous angst, some fluff at the end— happy ending bc we all need that right now.
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Gif from @swprequels​
“I still don’t understand why they need both of us,” you grumble, rubbing sleep out of your eyes as you walk out of the cruiser. The day is hot on Naboo, but grey and cloudy with a promise of rain later. The humidity makes your skin sticky, worsening your irritation.
“Think of it as a vacation,” Anakin pulls the luggage from the transport cubby, setting it on the ground beside him. “You watch over Clovis, and I’ll handle Padme. It should be a breeze.”
“Exactly. Which is why I don’t understand why they need both of us.”
You had just gotten back from a long and grueling siege on Pontoon, another one of those vast, endless desert planets in the Outer Rims. You’d really much rather be sitting in front of an air cooler right now, resting your tired bones and trying to forget the taste of sand.
“These are two very important Senators, Y/n,” Anakin waved off your attempt to help him with the luggage. “If anything happens to them at this debate, the Senate will lose important advocates for peace and the end of this war.”
You knew this, of course you did. Not that you’d completely agree with his statement-- Clovis always seemed a little shady to you, his morals seemingly scattered all over the place. You guessed that’s why the Council sent you, a simple marksman, to guard Clovis while the beloved freedom-fighter Padme Amidala got the most powerful Jedi to ever exist. 
“Besides,” said Jedi nudged you, lips curling into a teasing smile. “Don’t you want to spend time with me?”
Of course you do. Between the war and separate guild or Council missions you’d both been sent on, neither of you had time to even breathe in the others’ direction for months. The only reason the Council was able to wrangle you onto this cruiser was because Anakin was going to be there. Not that you’d even be able to spend much time with him during the day, although you were aware that you’d be sharing a room in between the Senators you’d be protecting at night…
You and Anakin meet the Senators at the hull of the ship. They walk down the ramp side by side, heads held high and hands clasped in front of them. Their movements are smooth, like they’re gliding on water, and the heat doesn’t seem to bother either of them.
“Master Skywalker. Y/n. Thank you so much for being here, it is so courageous of the both of you to be looking out for us,” Padme stands before you, beautiful as ever in one of her many extravagant, expensive gowns. The headpiece woven through her hair sparkles in the midday light, the warmth of her eyes capturing the rays of the brilliant sun. “However, I must say that I hope your services are not needed. I’d much rather this debate go by smoothly than have any dangerous interruptions.”
“I can assure you, we’ll take care of any problems before they arrive. Leave the dirty work up to us,” Anakin returns her smile, charming as ever. 
Anakin shoots you a glance and then follows her away, carrying multiple bags of luggage in each arm as Padme shows him where to put it. For such a small woman, she seemed to pack heavy. Unfortunately, this leaves you and Clovis to stand alone together, an awkward stillness settling before you.
“Um, Anakin has your luggage,” you yawn into your arm, gesturing to his receding form with the other. “I’m Y/n, and I’ll be your bodyguard for this debate.”
“You?” Clovis doesn’t smile, instead he scans you up and down with hawkish eyes. “You’re such a small thing. What could you possibly be able to do to protect me?”
It’s not said unkindly, but it still irks you. Your eyes narrow and you bite back a nasty retaliation for the sake of diplomacy. “You’ll find I’m pretty good with a blaster. The best, actually, according to the Jedi Council. That’s why they have me work with the Generals in the war.”
“Are you a General yourself?” Clovis begins to walk, heading toward the senate building. You follow at his side.
“Not exactly. They offered me the title, but I declined. I’m more of a freelancer, and once the war ends, I’ll go back to taking odd jobs. Besides, there’s no use in having an army if I don’t know what to do with it.”
“Humble. That’s admirable,” Clovis’s mouth tilts into something of a smile. “I, myself, could never turn down an army. Or the status, for that matter. You could be holding a lot of power if you pushed your way with the Jedi Council, you know.”
“My way?” you questioned. “I just told you, I don’t have a way--”
“And that’s your flaw,” he mused, chin still pointed up, never quite looking at you. “How curious-- your Jedi counterpart seems to have stolen all the ambition.” 
You roll your eyes. You never had a thirst for power, or status, or influence, or any of that. Your power came from behind a blaster, when your focus was trained on a single target and your finger was glued to the trigger. One simple twitch of a muscle, and you could end a life from miles away. That was your power, and it was all you needed.
He is right about Anakin, you have to admit. He was always looking to be better, not just for himself, but for the good of others. You love that about it, in fact it’s one of your favorite qualities about him. Sometimes, though, you wished he could see that he didn’t have to try so hard all the time to believe he was enough.
The blast of cold air that hits you as you enter the senate building wrenches you out of your thoughts. It whisks away the perspiration that had built up on your skin, cooling your body and calming your mood almost magically. The sounds of your collective footsteps tap along the glossy marble floor, echoing throughout the empty chamber.
“Aren’t you going to ask what we’re doing here?” Clovis leans against his podium, marked with a nametag spelling his name. Next to him is your seat, and on Clovis’s other side is Padme, followed by Anakin on the end. A cold dread fills your veins, just now realizing how boring tonight’s debate is going to be.
You sigh inwardly, tracing the engravings of your nametag with the tip of your finger. “My job isn’t to ask questions, it’s to observe.” 
“Well, observe away,” he pushes himself off the podium. “Although I don’t think it will be very entertaining.”
He’s right. You sit in your seat, legs crossed on top of your podium as you inspect your nails. It’s been three hours since you’ve arrived, the sun is setting, and all Clovis has done is stroll around the debate room, muttering to himself and pondering through his position. You’re bored out of your mind. Pulling out your holocom, you wonder if Anakin’s situation is any better.
“Y/n?” he picks up a long moment after you send the call, and his face projects blue before you. It’s loud where he is, and his eyes are looking at something else.
“Where are you?” you question. He sounds like he’s a party, but you know that can’t be true. “Where’s Padme?”
“She’s with me,” Anakin tilts his head, signalling that she’s sitting in front of him. “We’re at a restaurant getting dinner. I was just going to ask-- did you and Clovis go somewhere to eat yet?”
You drop your legs from the podium and lean in close to the com, speaking quiet so Clovis can’t hear. “No, he’s barely said a word to me since we got here. He’s been walking around the debate room all afternoon, just talking to himself.”
“You think he’s nervous for tonight?”
“Maybe,” you spare a glance at him. He’s staring at the domed ceiling, as if he’s counting the pillars coming out of it. “Or maybe he’s just psycho.”
“Oh, Clovis knows what he’s doing,” a femine voice interjects. Anakin’s eyes shoot forward again, immediately smiling as Padme speaks. “His pre-debate ritual is long and gruelling-- I should have warned you. He’s simply getting into his headspace, that’s all.”
“How long does it usually take?” you mumble.
“It shouldn’t be much longer. Make sure he eats beforehand, otherwise he’ll be crabby during the debate. And trust me, you don’t want to have to handle a crabby Clovis.”
Both Padme and Anakin laugh at this, and you force yourself to smile along. “Yeah, I’ll go see what he’s up to now.”
“Good,” Anakin says, momentarily drowned out by an uproar of cheers behind him. “We should get going, too. Padme needs to get dressed for the debate. See you soon.”
Anakin ends the call, and you’re left wondering how exactly the topic of dressing Padme came up. 
Shoving down your irritation and self-pity, you pocket your com and stand from your seat. Clovis’s head whips toward you like you had pulled a blaster on him.
“What?”
“It’s getting late,” you stretch your arms over your head, working out the kinks and aches from sitting so long. “I was wondering if you were hungry at all.”
“I can’t eat before a debate,” Clovis looks almost angry for a second, and then he glances down at his watch. His expression smooths into one of urgency. “Ah, we should head to the apartments. It’s time to get ready.”
The night is still warm, and the sidewalk drips with a rainstorm that you missed while you were in the senate building. The fresh air is nice, though, and you breathe in the smell of sweet flowers and savory restaurant food. The grumble in your stomach is hard to ignore, but you know you’ll manage.
Clovis leads you all the way to his suite, the temporary apartment that sits in conjunction with yours and Anakin’s, and Padme’s on the other side. Staying in this apartment complex made more sense rather than finding separate housing units, as keeping everyone together would aid in ensuring their safety.
Padme’s mansion would have been a nice stay, you think, but these apartment sweets are also quite luxurious. You walk into the master bedroom to find a formal, dark blue gown laid out for you on the bed. Next to it is a rumpled space where you assume Anakin’s suit had been, but instead there’s a note and a box.
Padme wanted to get to the senate building early, so we’re probably going to just miss you. Too bad, I won’t get to help you into this sexy blue dress. Maybe I can help you out of it later.
You laugh softly, smoothing your thumb over the inked-on smiley face before finishing the note.
I’m not sure if you had time to get anything to eat, so I got you something while we were out. See you soon.
A
You don’t need an “I love you” scrawled into the paper in order to know he wanted to add it. That would have been too risky, and there was no way you’d be able to make an excuse if anyone were to find it. Still, you rip up the note and throw it in the trash before opening the box underneath. Your nose is instantly filled with the smell of food, still warm, and you sit next to the blue dress, digging in unceremoniously.
You scarf down as much of the food as you can and then store the rest in the fridge before getting to work on making yourself presentable. You have to look put together, yet not so much that you stand out. You slip a couple of silver clasps into your hair and do your makeup, opting for a bold lip color because you don’t have much time to do anything fancy with your eyes. You’re running short on time-- you know this because of the knock on your door, and then the irritated sound of Clovis:
“Y/n, we have to leave now or we’re going to be late. You know how bad it would be to arrive late to this event?”
You stand in front of the mirror, desperately reaching behind you to grasp at the zipper of your dress. It would be so much easier if Anakin was here to reach it for you, but you make due and quickly pull it up. The dress is form-fitting and flows down into a puddle around your feet. A bit long, as you opted not to wear heels in case something went awry, so you bunch the skirt up in your fists and jog to the door.
“My apologies,” you open the door to find Clovis, now dressed in a pristine black and white suit with his hair gelled back. “I was making sure I had my equipment all in order.”
Clovis ignores your excuse, eyes instantly moving to take in your figure. You could swear they blow open wide for a fraction of a second before he composes himself, clearing his throat and masking his approval with his usual grim expression.
“You clean up quite elegantly. Now, we should head to the lobby, the limousine is waiting for us.”
You’re not sure what the point of a limousine is, as the walk from the apartment buildings to the senate building is 10 minutes tops. Probably for formalities, you decide, as Clovis helps you out of the vehicle. The building that had been vacant only a couple hours earlier is now swarming with Senators, all dressed in lavish, extravagant gowns. Everyone is holding a flute of some sort of drink, and they congregate in small groups, making small talk before the debate starts. 
Clovis wastes no time with socializing, and beelines for his seat.
You hang back, searching the crowd for Anakin. Without heels, many people tower over you and it’s hard to focus with the deafening sound of chatter filling your ears. But you’re trained for this, have spent your whole life blocking out the unnecessary, so you hone into your patience and scan the crowd closer. 
There.
You’d recognize that head of golden-brown curls anywhere, even if it was tamed down for this event. He’s standing tall among the Senators, eyes gleaming bright as he engages a whole crowd of them in some wily story. He and Padme look at each other and laugh, his hand on her shoulder and her hand finding his waist. Your blood suddenly turns hot, and you push your way through the crowd to make it to them.
If you could, you would march right up and pull him away from all those greedy stares. They’re practically drooling all over him, and Padme’s hand is still on his waist. But you know better-- you can’t let anyone know you and Anakin are familiar, so you stand at the edge of the crowd, meeting Anakin’s eye.
You glare at his face, then at Padme’s hand, then back to him. His eyes narrow into a warning, extremely fleeting, and then he continues on charming the crowd. You know what he wanted to say-- it means nothing. It doesn’t stop the heat from blossoming in the pit of your stomach, the irritated glare you shoot Padme before looking down.
Way to stay under the radar, you think, slipping away from the crowd and deciding it’s better to keep your eyes on Clovis than get angry over a move on your boyfriend that was probably innocent. 
Clovis is sitting at his seat, still as stone, surveying the crowd before him.
“You nervous?” you take your seat beside him.
“Not at all.”
“Good. You’ve been preparing all afternoon, I think it’d be ridiculous if you still doubted yourself.”
“You… have faith in me.”
“Of course,” your eyes softened at the vulnerability in his statement. “You’re a powerful Senator.”
He huffed, the crack in his green eyes immediately cementing over. “I know.”
And, there he is. Back to being gruff and dismissive. 
It’s quiet for a moment longer, but you’re okay with that. Small talk is not an interest of yours either, and you’d much rather sip on the flute of drink that a servant had given you than join the crowd on the floor. 
Unfortunately, you have trouble wrenching your eyes away from Padme and Anakin, who are still surrounded by drooling Senators. Padme looks like an angel, dressed in a floor length gown spun out of gold thread that you’re pretty sure came directly from the sun. It shimmers and sparkles as she moves, standing out like a beacon of light among the rest of the room. She is radiant, with a matching headpiece that glitters like a chandelier, the jewels braided in and out of her chocolate curls. Even her makeup is minimal yet blindingly beautiful, with a gold shimmer staining her eyelids and cheekbones that reflect the warmth of her topaz eyes.
“She’s gorgeous, isn’t she?” Clovis murmurs next to you, so quiet you almost don’t hear it.
“Who? Padme?”
“I believe she’s taking quite a liking to the Jedi.”
Heat sparks in your blood again. The fact that even Clovis notices how handsy Padme is being… then again, it’s a known fact that Clovis and Padme have a history, and he could just be reading too far into things out of jealousy.
“You shouldn’t call him that,” you choose to ignore his concerns. “Anyone could be listening.”
“You see that smile? That’s the smile she only ever gave me. I wonder if she even knows she’s doing it…”
“Clovis, Anakin isn’t allowed to form attachments. You have nothing to worry about.”
“It’s not him that bothers me,” he admits. “It’s her. Look. Look at the way she leans into him when she laughs.”
You take his advice and… now that he says it, she does get a little too close for your liking. Every time Anakin finishes a punchline, the crowd erupts in laughter and Padme joins in, bracing herself by gripping onto his arms and grinning into his neck. He catches her, ever the gentlemen, but he’s smiling too.
It’s a little more than innocent, and you can’t tell who’s fault it is. But that doesn’t help the jealousy steadily rising in your chest.
“The debate should be starting soon,” is all you say, leaning back in your seat and scowling into your flute of drink.
The only thing keeping you rooted to the seat instead of launching out of your chair to rip Padme away from Anakin by the hair was the fact that you know you’re the one who’s going to be sharing a bed with him tonight-- not her. 
You’re just hoping he even makes it back to your bed. Or will poor Padme need help with something else that requires Anakin’s doting attention?
A bell rings just on time, signaling for the Senators to take their seats. Anakin leads Padme over, arms hooked around each other, and she smiles at you as she approaches.
“Y/n, you look wonderful,” she whispers, and then slides into the seat between Clovis and Anakin.
Your cheeks burn in shame. How can you harbor such awful feelings toward her when she was so sweet? But the anger is worsened by the compliment she had just given you-- it’s one thing to be drop-dead stunning, why does she have to be so kind, too? What are you to compare? 
After tonight, Anakin’s probably going to think you are so difficult-- always complaining, always tired, never as pretty or gentle or kind. You don’t have a laugh that twinkles like wind-chimes, or eyes that reflect the light like soft glowing pools of honey. If she is the sun, you are just a cold, hard, chunk of ashen moonrock.
The debate goes on for an eternity. You zone out for a lot of it, stewing in your anger and drowning in self-deprecating thoughts. A few times you’re brought to the brink of tears before you remind yourself you’re here on a mission, and throw yourself into scanning every nook and cranny for something that could be amiss. Eventually, a break is ordered.
Senators begin to rise from their podiums to stretch their legs, including Padme. She tells Anakin she’s going to the washroom, and your eyes zero in on the fingers lingering on his arm as she leaves. You stand as well, meaning to walk a little and stretch your legs, and Anakin follows you.
“Padme’s right,” he catches up to you easily. “You do look wonderful. Blue really is your color.”
You stop by the open window, breathing in the fresh air as you search his eyes for truth. Does he truly mean it? Does he look at you with that same light he had looked at Padme with? Or is he only saying it because he has to? Because he’s used to complimenting you because you’re his girlfriend?
“What? What’s the matter?”
“Nothing,” you lower your gaze, picking at the marble stone engravings of the windowsill. 
“Y/n,” Anakin lowers his voice. He’s concerned now, picking up on how upset you are. “I said you look beautiful. What’s the problem?” “No, you said I look wonderful. It’s different than beautiful.” You mean to leave it there, but  can’t help but add, grumbling under your breath, “Padme looks beautiful.”
It’s immature. You know it as soon as you say it, but for some reason you can’t stop yourself. You just want Anakin to take more notice of how strong Padme’s coming on to him, to assure you that it means nothing. You know it means nothing, but you still need that confirmation.
“She does,” he says, and your heart drops. You look up at him, and he’s staring back with an intensity you can’t decipher. “She’s a Senator, Y/n, this is her debate. Of course she has to look beautiful.”
“She’s more beautiful,” the words fall from your lips and taste like poison.
“What’s this about?” Anakin’s voice is dripping in irritation. Once hearing it himself, he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. When he opens them, he speaks again in a softer tone. “Why are you comparing yourself to Padme?”
Gah, even the sound of her name coming from his mouth is like nails on a chalkboard. But you decide to do the first smart thing you have all evening, and take a lesson from him. You breathe deeply and bite down on your anger before answering.
“I’m not trying to,” you admit, eyes falling from his face to trace the exposed skin of his neck. “I just-- she’s flirting with you.”
“It’s harmless.”
“I-- I know. But…”
“It still bothers you. You’re jealous.”
“I have nothing to be jealous about,” even saying this, you can hear the lie in your voice. You repeat the statement, more to yourself, trying to believe it. He’s yours-- for now. He could just as easily be Padme’s. What if he wants to be Padme’s? 
“Look,” Anakin takes another grounding breath, then fits a finger beneath your chin, tilting it up to look at him. “I can see you’re trying to think rationally, so I’m not going to tell you that you’re being ridiculous. But… you’re being ridiculous.”
“Wow. Thanks.”
“You have to understand, I do not like Padme like you’re thinking. I--” he cuts himself off, eyes flitting around the room before leaning in close to whisper in your ear. “I love you.”
Goosebumps erupt all over your skin, making you shiver. His lips ghosting over your ear, the whispered promise of his devotion to you… suddenly, you feel very stupid.
“Okay,” you accept, and the bells ring again, signalling everyone to take their seats. You head on over with him, but not before putting as much heart into your next words. “I’m sorry for getting jealous.”
“It’s okay,” he gives you the first warm smile of the night, smoothing your hair down quickly before breaking off to take his own seat.
You sit next to Clovis, considerably calmer, replaying Anakin’s whispered “I love you” over and over in your head, the touch of his gentle hand in your hair. There was no need to make such a fuss, and honestly you were upset with yourself for ruining the night. You decide to make another smart decision for the night, and push away all of the negative thoughts to the deepest corner of your mind. No more, not tonight-- instead, you would focus on a way to make it up to him for being so ridiculous, and to thank him for being so patient with you.
It’s as you’re planning the rest of your night out, that you see Clovis’s knee bouncing under the podium. You know his time to speak is coming up soon, and his actions betray his mind. He’s such a liar. He is nervous.
“You’ve got this,” you tell him, reaching onto the podium to give his hand a squeeze. His palms are clammy, and he looks at you like you’ve struck him.
“I know I do,” he spits, but doesn’t move his hand from underneath yours. “It’s just pre-performance jitters.”
His next words are so quiet, you almost don’t catch them.
“It doesn’t help that I have two gorgeous women sitting next to me to witness this all.”
Now it’s your turn to look like you’ve been struck. You know he means for you to hear it, otherwise he wouldn’t have said it. Anakin seems to be thinking the same thing, as you can see him give Clovis a sidelong glance just as Padme takes the seat between them again.
“I-- um… we’re rooting for you,” you fumble. “No need to get nervous now.”
Clovis blows out a long breath, and then covers your hand that’s squeezing his palm with his other. “Thank you, Y/n. You’ve truly been so patient and accommodating this whole night. I must find a way to pay you back afterwards.”
“Oh, there’s no need--” your words are cut off as the delegates call for order, and then the debate resumes. You don’t miss the way Anakin’s back stiffens in his seat.
Clovis works up a nervous sweat in the minutes leading up to his speech, but when he gets up, he delivers it without a flaw. Everyone claps, and then Padme goes. You clap along once she’s finished, trying not to calculate if Anakin is clapping harder or faster for her than anyone else. He’s not… but you just had to be sure.
There never seemed to be any threat for the entire night, except for one instance. A young man stood by the door, eyes shifting around for a moment too long to be casual, and Clovis seemed to notice as well. 
“Where, exactly, is that equipment you were speaking of earlier?”
“There’s a strap on my thigh, and it holds my blaster to it. Look,” you pull your skirt back to reveal your leg up to your thigh, where the tip of your blaster peaks out. “See, nothing to worry about.”
It doesn’t even cross your mind that Anakin would notice, or that he’d even mind.
Finally, the debate ends, and the senate room is dismissed. You let out a long breath, ready to just get out of this dress and relax in the suite with Anakin now. However, you stand to leave your seat but Clovis is in your way.
“Y/n, like I said before… I must show my gratitude for your services. Please, let me buy you dinner.”
“Oh-- Oh geez… um.... I can’t,” your eyes flit from Clovis to Anakin, who’s standing behind him. He’s got his back turned, bidding farewell to the new friends he made, but you know for sure that he’s listening. “I really need to go to bed, we’re leaving early in the morning.”
“You can come to my suite, we can order room service. They’re right next to each other… besides, you can always just stay over at mine for the night. There’s room.”
That tone. Those eyes. You know what he’s insinuating, and it sure as hell isn’t just dinner. 
“Clovis, I’d love to, but I really can’t.”
“Oh. Okay.”
The green cracks of his eyes are hardening again, the soft daisies growing from them being wrenched out in clenched fists and stomped under a boot. You want to stop them from freezing over in that insufferable ice again, and decide it might be nice to humor him for a job well done tonight. After all, he was a lot kinder to you than you thought he’d ever be, and part of you likes being one of the few people on his good side.
“How about I walk back with you to the apartments? We can do that much.”
Clovis smiles, and holds out an arm. “I’ll take it.”
As Clovis escorts you out of the debate room, you turn to look back at Anakin. He’s ushering Padme out of the crowds, staring after you as you leave. He doesn’t smile, or wave, or do anything really. Except look angry. 
A sudden ball of nervousness forms in the pit of your stomach. Oh no. Offering to do this was a mistake, that much is becoming clear with every step you take with Clovis latched onto your arm. You can feel Anakin’s eyes burning into your back the entire way out of the senate building, until you’re on the streets of Naboo and he’s off in a limousine with Padme. 
Of course he’s going to be angry at you now. You were mad at him for allowing Padme to flirt with him, and now he’s going to think you’re making a move on Clovis to get back at him for it. Even though that’s not at all what’s happening… Oh how the tables have turned. 
You’re jittery the whole walk back. Clovis tries to make conversation, but you only offer him short, clipped answers. Really, you should have shut down his advances in the debate room. No matter that you pitied him for being rejected by Padme and yourself, you should have said no. You didn’t owe him anything. But here you are, and now you are going to suffer the consequences from Anakin when you get back to your room.
“Are you sure you can’t stop in? Not even just for a drink?” Clovis asks as you make it to the top of the stairs. You turn the corner, and Anakin is leaning against your apartment door, arms crossed, clearly waiting for you. 
“Uhh,” you unwind your arm from around Clovis’s. “I really can’t. Sorry.”
Clovis follows your gaze, and sees Anakin. His tone turns steely. “Is it because of that Jedi?”
“No, oh my-- no!” you feign the most incredulous expression you can, nerves growing more frenzied as you grow closer to your apartment door. “I really am just so tired. Please Clovis, I have to go.”
“Y/n, it doesn’t have to be like this--”
“You’re right,” a deep voice cuts in. “It doesn’t.” 
Anakin takes the arm that Clovis refused to let go of, and slips it out of his grasp. Thankfully, for Clovis’s sake, he lets him. Anakin pushes you behind him and stands before Clovis, towering over him by a couple inches. 
“It was a pleasure serving you and Senator Amidala. Hopefully we can work together again soon. Have a good night”
Each word that comes from his lips are dripping with venom. Clovis grows red in the face, and you can tell he’s trying hard not to retaliate. In the end, he decides to turn and stalk back to his own apartment door. 
Once it slams shut, Anakin turns to you. You meet his eyes with the most innocent expression you can put on.
“None of that,” he hisses, and steps past you to walk into the apartment.
“Oh, come on!” you follow close behind, closing the door and jogging to catch up with him. He’s standing before the bed, roughly loosening his tie. “Anakin, please don’t be mad. I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Really? How am I supposed to believe that after what happened earlier?”
“Yes, okay, I admit I was jealous of you and Padme. But I got over it! I swear I wasn’t trying to get you back for it, I promise. I wouldn’t do that to you.”
Anakin pulls the buttons off his shirt so hard, you’re afraid they might break. Suddenly, he is shirtless, and so very mad, and so very tall… and muscular… and… wow…
“You can’t even look me in the eye when you say that,” he argues, stopping to stand before you. You wrench your eyes away from his toned midriff and meet his eyes, which are blazing with hurt and anger. A warmth is rising in your veins-- a different kind than earlier-- but it’s beat out with something stronger. Guilt.
“I’m sorry,” you tell him, trying so desperately to ignore the heat that’s radiating off his chest. “I really am. Clovis was just… kinder than I expected him to be--”
“Was he? Was he kind when he had you sit in silence all afternoon in the senate building? Was he kind when he refused to let you eat? When he guilt-tripped you into spending time with him?”
“That’s not exactly what happened,” you cross your arms and size him up. “And you’re not totally innocent either, you know.”
“Really?” Anakin cocks an eyebrow at you, sitting down on the bed roughly. He leans back on his arms, daring you to continue.
“You let Padme flirt with you, and you never told her to stop. You could have set some boundaries, told her to back off a little...”
“And you could have told me you were leaving with Clovis before gathering your skirts and skipping away,” Anakin bites back. 
“I wasn’t planning to! Anakin, please, both of us made mistakes tonight. Can we just agree on that?”
He frowns, eyes flickering over your still-dressed form. He motions for you to come closer and turn around, so you do. Gentle fingers work at the zip on your back, dragging it down to free you from the constraints. You remember the note he wrote from earlier, how he couldn’t wait to take the dress off of you, and grow disappointed at how the night had gone. This was not the context you had been expecting. 
The way his hands linger on your waist, you know he’s thinking the same thing.
“Okay. We both made mistakes.” You feel his soft curls against the bare skin of your back as rests his forehead against you. You hold your dress up in the front so as not to expose yourself. “I’m sorry for letting Padme flirt with me. I should have put an end to it-- I know it hurt you to watch.”
“It did,” you whisper. “But I’m also sorry. For getting so jealous even though you never accepted her advances, and for making it seem like I was trying to get revenge. It wasn’t my intention.”
A soft “it’s okay” is kissed into your back. His hands grip your waist, turning you in his grasp. He’s looking up at you now, hair mussed up and eyes wary. “You good?”
“Yeah. You?”
“Yes.”
“Okay.”
What were you guys doing? At the end of the day, it’s you and him. Padme is out of the picture, and so is Clovis. Everything is alright, and that fuss you both put up throughout the night was virtually pointless.
Looking into his eyes, the ones you love so much and could never picture yourself ever parting from, suddenly this whole thing seems elementary. How terrible, disastrous, and ironic this night turned out. Replaying the events in your head, you find a smile begin to crack at your lips. Anakin can’t keep a straight face either, the ridiculousness of it all beginning to catch up with you both. You begin to laugh, and he follows, burying his head in your stomach as you hug around his neck.
“We must be back in training school,” you giggle, feeling his shoulders shake beneath you. “How pathetic of us.”
“Ahh,” he groans, suddenly wrenching you off your feet and onto the bed on top of him. He nuzzles his face into your neck, pulling you as close to him as possible. “Let’s just forget this night ever happened. It was dreadful and embarrassing.”
“As far as I’m concerned, I was never even here.”
“Me neither,” he presses a line of warm kisses down your neck, stopping at the strap of your dress. “Let’s get this off. Do you still have your blaster on you?”
You pat the metal strapped onto your thigh. “Locked and loaded.”
“Well, gee, thanks for telling me. I definitely didn’t want to get my head blown off.”
“Safety’s on, wisecrack,” you help him shrug your dress off, kicking it from your legs and off the end of the bed. You unclasp the band from around your thigh and distribute the blaster onto the nightstand. 
“I’m the wisecrack,” you don’t miss the way Anakin’s voice deepens, attention suddenly captured by the bare skin of your body beneath him. His eyes follow the path his fingers are tracing up your leg. “Careful, or I’ll have to report that to the Council.”
“For what? Being right?”
“For creating conflict of interest on the job,” his fingers skim the soft flesh of your upper thighs, tickling their way past the curve of your hips, the dip of your waist, up and up and up… “It’s terribly naughty of you.”
His words are teasing and corny, but somehow the deeper insinuation of them still cause your cheeks to burn red. 
“Anakin,” your voice is hoarse, causing your blush to deepen. His long fingers cup your chin, keeping your lips ghost over his as his other hand pulls the silver clasps from your hair. “I need a shower.”
“I can meet you in there?”
You clutch at his shoulders, bringing him forward to close that gap between your lips. His mouth is warm against yours, pliant and soft and generous. It’s everything you’ve been yearning for all night, all this time you’ve been apart. The smell of him, taste of him, feel of him— you could never get enough. 
“I’ll save you a spot.” 
644 notes · View notes
milfnearyou · 4 years ago
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                𝐨𝐡 𝐬𝐞𝐡𝐮𝐧: 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥.
 “𝐡𝐞’𝐬 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐡𝐞’𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭, 𝐢𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮.”
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𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓: 2.4K | 𝐎𝐇 𝐒𝐄𝐇𝐔𝐍 𝐗 𝐅𝐄𝐌!𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑
𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: ANGST. CHEATING. BETRAYAL. SUGGESTIVE. THATS PRETTY MUCH IT THIS TIME AROUND. NGL THIS ISN’T MY BEST WORK AND IS A SHORT ONE SHOT, SORRY! CLICK HEADER FOR HIGHER RESOLUTION BC TUMBLR IS STUPID.
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“So you just woke up one day and decided you loved me?!” 
Your voice was painfully shrill, bouncing against the metal walls and echoing through the elevator shaft. If you hadn't been so furious, you would've cringed at the way you sounded. Considering your behaviour to be completely out of character and rather petty. But it was impossible to think straight. With all the sirens in your mind screaming 'Alert!' causing you to grow defensive. You saw everything as red, wrapped in a series of warning signs. Eager to protect yourself you grew aggressive, fury coursing through your veins and laced with disgust. 
The disbelief was evident in your tone, accompanied by the extremely annoyed look plastered on your face. Your eyebrows were contorted together, lightly creasing your forehead as you anxiously chewed on your bottom lip. Your hands were balled into tight fists trembling at your sides as you fought the urge to beat the living crap out of him. 
"Fucking answer me Sehun!" You exclaim, throwing your hands in the air. You didn't understand him, not taking any of his bullshit words seriously as a result. Had he been telling the truth, had he truly meant every word he said. Sehun wouldn't have just stood there in front of you with nothing to say. The silence he offered simply adding more fuel to the fire that raged inside of you. 
"So now you're silent? You weren't this fucking quiet back when you were professing your so-called love to me?! What's gotten into you now?"
Again, nothing but silence. The tall man simply stands there in front of you with his hands shoved into the pockets of his pants as the elevator continues to rise higher and higher. With every floor, the elevator cabinet passed, the angrier you got and it didn't help that you lived in a high rise apartment. If he continued to act this way you'd be fuming, steam emitting from your body by the time you'd reach your floor.
“Do you even know what it means to love someone? Or do you just throw yourself in any direction that proves beneficial to your selfish well being?” The questions flew past your lips one after another. You weren’t going to hold back either. Pushing yourself towards him, forcing him to explain himself. 
You didn't deserve the silence. You deserved proper answers, ones that were absent from the immature man in front of you. 
"Answer me right now or I swear to god I'm cutting you off forever," Warning him, you take a step forward to face him closer. Invading his personal space as you stare at him, craning your neck upwards with your arms crossed. 
Watching him like a hawk, you attentively wait. Noticing how he seems to take a slight step back, his broad chest heaving up and down slowly. He seems to be nervous or perhaps, flustered? It was hard for you to believe that with all the ways he could've handled the situation this was what he opted for.
Step by step, you get closer and closer towards Sehun until he's got his back pressed against the metal walls of the elevator. It was hard to believe that someone who looked dominant most of the time could be so cowardly. 
"I'm not asking again," You state, pressing your index finger roughly against his chest. Physically pushing him around until he's finally had enough. His large hands pressing against your shoulders as he shoves you back, regaining his confidence. Finally, he refutes, silence no longer being an option for him.
“Fuck off! Do you want an answer? Fine, but you don't have to act like such an invasive bitch about things!" 
Stunned your eyes widen. You can't tell if you should be offended or impressed with just how much you pushed him but you let him speak. Not saying anything even though he had just called you a bitch. 
"No, I didn’t just wake up one morning and decide that I’d fall in love with you! It took me countless days and nights, essentially adding up into months of thinking about nothing except you! Do you know how painful it felt for me? Do you not understand how guilty I felt?!” The tone in his voice is dangerously low as he narrows his eyes at you. It's his turn to match your attitude, fixing his posture and standing tall. 
"Oh really? So you only thought about how you felt and not how I would feel knowing about your feelings for me? Sehun, how selfish can you be? You aren't the only person on this godforsaken planet!" 
"You don't think I knew that? I know you wouldn't be happy with this but you have to understand that had I kept everything to myself and continued to hang out around you; it would've been both disrespectful to you but also incredibly torturous to me. It was worth gambling my feelings and confessing with the consequence of potentially losing a friend instead of hiding it."  
Taken aback, you feel yourself pause and you hate yourself for it. Sehun has a point, he's valid for being upfront about things but there was just one thing that didn't sit right with you. Despite wanting an answer and getting it you curse yourself for falling silent. The hypocrisy of your silence hitting you square in the face but you're not done. You still have one more thing to say.
"What about the fact that you're still dating my best friend? Did you think about how much this would hurt her? No, let me guess, I bet you haven't even mentioned anything to her," Bringing your best friend up seemed to be the major thing standing in between both of you.
Sehun stares at you like he's been frozen in time. His features completely poised and monotone as your eyes scan his face for any sign of emotion. It was still much too hard to accept his words, to trust them and understand that it came from the bottom of his heart. Your anger was now replaced with complete confusion, perhaps even denial as you scoff at him. He was crazy to think you'd ditch your best friend for a man like him.
Sehun only stood there with his shoulders pushed back, his posture relaxed. His orange tufts of hair making him look like a complete clown. His current demeanour was very different in comparison to how defensive he was earlier.
How could he be so hot and cold? None of it made sense with his face being completely unreadable, everything felt bland like a black and white movie. Sehun could scream as much as he wanted but his words would never get through, bouncing behind the screen, staying unheard from the crowd. All these things made it impossible to find the sincerity he had in his words represented in his body language. 
The elevator came to a stop with a rather loud ding notifying you that it had arrived on your floor. You take one last look at Sehun battling with yourself on whether or not someone as selfish as him was worth entangling yourself with. But no matter how you thought of it you couldn't accept him. With Sehun came consequences, ones that you weren't willing to risk getting into and that being losing your best friend. Someone who was there for you through thick and thin could never be replaced with a man you'd only known for roughly a year.
He didn't mean anything to you and he wasn't allowed to have any meaning in your life, it just wasn't okay. Betrayal had a greater impact than love, you would be foolish to accept the latter. 
Leaving him behind, you step outside of the elevator. Realizing just how much more breathable the air outside the shaft was in comparison to being back inside holed up with your worst nightmare. Your moment of freedom is cut short when you feel his lean arms wrap around your waist pulling you back inside.
He's clinging onto you like a child refusing to let go as he rests his head next to your shoulder. His hot breath brushing against your neck, making you uncomfortable for many reasons that were quite obvious. He just wasn't single nor available and you couldn't let yourself be the other girl. 
“Please just—take a chance. I'm willing to cross oceans for you, tear apart anything that stands in my way because I love you. I'll break up with her, she's nothing like you. Why can't you see that I love you?” He rambles, his voice falling soft. Sehun sounds like he's about to fall apart as he speaks into the crook of your neck. 
His voice vibrating against your skin, echoing through your mind. Despite his tone being no louder than a whisper, his message came loud and clear. Slowly his plump, soft lips make contact with your skin as you freeze in place watching as the elevator doors slam shut. Moving downwards again you feel like you're slowly descending to hell. 
His actions gave you goosebumps as he peppered kisses against your neck. Using one hand to grasp your waist, holding you close to him. While the other cupped your cheek, tilting your head slightly so he could gain better access to your body, his kisses moving down south and landing onto your shoulder. Pushing your shirt slightly aside before gently biting down on your skin causing you to gasp. 
Sehun's touch was electrifying and almost hypnotizing, you felt yourself growing dizzy and out of touch with your surrounding. As he continued using his lips to convey how much you meant to him against your screaming mind that yelled at you not to do this to your best friend. But like a fool, you melt into his touch. Lips falling apart, as your chest heaves up and down. The air feels intoxicating as he rotates your head towards him. His lips crashing against yours as you feel like you're about to pass out. 
You can't give in, you can't betray your best friend and yet, you feel yourself kissing him back. Your tongue tangling with his, exchanging dirty, secretive kisses. Turning around to face him better you fall into all the places you knew weren't right and that was right into the arms of Sehun's. Intertwining your fingers with his, holding onto him tightly as if the only chance you'd have with him would be taken away. 
Now you knew what it meant to be selfish and just how delicious it tasted. 
The elevator is filled with the lewd, smacking of the shared kisses between you both. His body grinding into yours as you feel yourself growing heavy. Developing a strong heartbeat where your filthy desires lay. You felt yourself growing wet, shifting your thighs uncomfortably together. Feeling his hand snake down towards the waistline of your skirt, tugging on them. 
"You just have to say the word and I'm dropping everything and everyone for you," He says in between kisses as you tilt your head back in pleasure when you feel his fingers slipping past your skirt. Hovering dangerously over your soaked heat. "Do you want to run away with me?" He asks. 
You want to say yes. Your body having a mind of its own would rather speak for you but you just can't bring yourself to go through with it. The image of your best friend is hung up in your mind and even though the damage has already been done, you still don't think it's too late to stop. 
“I can’t and you know I won’t,” You reply, wincing at how your voice cracks. You didn’t want to seem weak in front of him, you needed to show him you had control over how you felt. That you were sure you didn't want him but it was all a lie. A lie you told yourself and in return had the truth spoken out loud by the actions of your body. 
Sehun knew of this and yet, his peppered kisses come to a halt. The grip he's got around you loosening as his hand slips out of your skirt. You step out of his grasp feeling ashamed, not daring to look at him. Turning around and staring at the doors instead. Fixing your shirt you crane your neck from side to side trying your best to calm down. Bringing a shaky hand towards the elevator buttons and clicking for your floor. 
You can feel Sehun's gaze boring holes into the back of your head. 
"I don't understand. Why can't you just let me love you? It's not that hard to just give me a shot. I can give you the world, give you all the happiness and security you need in life."
"--Let me be the man that protects you, that cherishes you. I know it's hard because of her but...don't we deserve to be happy?" He pleads, his voice wavering. If you had turned around to face him you'd see his lips quivering. His dark, brown eyes are glossy with tears threatening to escape from the tiny apertures of his tear ducts. 
But currently, it's your turn to fall silent. All because you know that despite him falling at the seams, begging you to love him you know that he'll only go back to being the same once he's got you twirling around his dainty fingers. His norm being the same silent person as always, emotionally unavailable and confusing as always. Plus, who's to say he won't just ditch you like he's doing to your best friend? 
"It's your turn to answer me," He pleads but you ignore him. Thanking the timing of the elevator for opening right at the end of his sentence. 
Quickly stepping off you pray that he doesn't snake himself around you again because if he does, you don't know if you had the power inside to fight him off again and thankfully he doesn't. Sehun leaves you alone watching you get out of his view, the sound of your Chelsea boots clicking against the hallway floors until suddenly you're just gone. A wave of heartbreak washing over his feelings as he realizes that he just can't sit here and do nothing. 
He won't go back to your best friend, he doesn't love her and in fact, he never did. It wasn't his choice to hurt her like this but he couldn't help but fall in love with the wrong person. So he chases you, chases the love of his life eager to satisfy his selfishness and have you by his side. 
The consequence of dealing with your best friend could come later but first, he needed to convince you once and for all that he was the only good thing in his life. Your best friend was to be replaced. 
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   𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇��𝐒 𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐄𝐃: 𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐅𝐍𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐘𝐎𝐔©︎
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