#mostly vectors...you know how it is

[cyberdragoninfinity]

miscellaneous late game and post-watch zexal doodles from twitter

[sysig]

Can’t, too busy flirting ♥ (Patreon)

[sonknuxadow]

they added more people to the knuckles cast and ben and colleen still aren't there. sitting outside paramounts doors crying and begging to see my little guys

[taurusdesign]

"Our Little Ones" Collection

Hi beloved simmers!

I'm finally here. I'm sorry the set is delayed again. When I look at your supportive comments, although these delays are not a problem for you, I still feel bad. 

The set contains a total of 50 items for infants, toddlers, kids and pets. Although there are mostly items for kids, there are also a nice amount of items for the rest. I also tried to do elements on the set that I hadn't seen on the sim before. It's like a Pillow Fort, a Tea Party Set, a Pet House that can be embedded in the wall. I would have loved to have made the tea party functional. But it's functional as a dollhouse. So it might look like your little sims are having a tea party with their toys.

My inspiration on the set was the Pottery Barn's Catalina set. Of course, since everything I wanted was not available in this set, I designed many things myself.

The items included in the set are below:

Babies (Infants and Toddlers)

2 types of Toddler Beds

Bedding for Toddler Beds

2 types of Cribs

Changing Station

Drawer Chest

Dresser

Extra-Wide Dresser

High Chair

Nightstand

Potty Chair

Rocking Chair (Growing Together Required)

Wall Mirror

Kids

4 types of Single Beds

4 types of Double Beds

2 types of Bunk Beds *

Bedding for Single Beds

Bedding for Double Beds

Bedding for Bunk Beds *

Bookcase

2 types of Books for Bookcase

Chair with Backpack

Desk Storage

Desk Storage with Hutch

Desk Storage with Smart Hutch

Decor for Desk Storage with Hutch

Writing Desk

Dresser

Nightstand

Shelves

Skateboard with Books

Tea Party Set

Toy Box

Pillow Fort ** (Dream Home Decorator Required)

Wardrobe

Pets (Cats and Dogs Required)

Pets Bowl ***

Cat Tree

Pet House

Litter Box

Pet Bed ****

Scratch Post

* If the bunks cannot be used by your sim, please place them as follows.

1. Place top bunk bedding

2. Place bottom bedding

3. Place frames

** I recommend that you reduce the size by 1 when placing the pillow fort. You can also use the normal size. Fully optional. 

*** When you fill the food into the pet bowl, the bowl on the far right fills with water.

**** I wanted to make this item in pet size, but it became a regular loveseat size. I don't know how it happened.

I hope you like it and it's worth the wait. 💖💖💖

Special thanks to one of my favorite CC creator @myshunosun for fabric texture ❤️

Bedding patterns:

Kids Pattern Vectors by Vecteezy

Animals Vectors by Vecteezy

Animals Vectors by Vecteezy

Animals Vectors by Vecteezy

Animals Vectors by Vecteezy

Animals Vectors by Vecteezy

Animals Vectors by Vecteezy

Summer Pattern Vectors by Vecteezy

Animals Vectors by Vecteezy

Public Release: October 9, 2023

AVAILABLE FOR EVERYONE!

DOWNLOAD AT:

CURSEFORGE

PATREON

[tofupixel]

Good

How do you define pixel art?

Because technically all art which isn't vector is made of pixels

I know that doesn't make all raster art pixel art. But if I were to make a really big piece in pixels from afar it would look pretty smooth

So is it just making it with the intention and using pixels or something else?

Genuinely curious

really it's all opinions. but my opinion is that it's mostly about technique. some people think it's more about limitations (like digital art has many more colours and much more smoothing)

here is some info written by a much smarter and more experienced pixel artist than me: https://pixeljoint.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=11299

so for me it's about the technique. i choose my canvas sizes smaller just so i can finish my art in a reasonable time. but if i made a canvas 10x the size, i would still be doing the same methods and techniques, it would just take 10x longer.

i don't think how the viewer percieves the work is that important. for instance we have seen pixel art on many different screens and devices over the decades. imo intention and process is more important to "what is pixel art"

so i don't agree that all digital art is pixel art just because we use completely different methods to digital artists. we use different brushes and canvases, it is a different medium. again u can read more about it in this tutorial here:

[buginacup]

What was the hardest Beastie for you to design in general! There's so many fantastic designs I'm curious which one had you stumped if any at all. Also how on earth did you come up with so many funny little expressions! I feel like I see a new one everytime I play, they're fantastic! Thank you for your wonderful touch to this game, such lovely little guys!

What was the hardest Beastie for you to design in general?

One in particular comes to mind but it's still sort of a secret. I'll try to return to this when more people know about it so I can talk about it in particular!

There were plenty of other snags, though. In particular Crabaret was so so hard to pose. They don't have finished sprites yet, but Crabaret is unique in that their final sprites will not flip (always crab walking), instead they have two sets of poses for w/e direction they're facing.

Have you ever tried to imagine a crab pivoting on a "waist"? A crab doesn't have a waist! And I gave its torso such a naturalistic shape from every angle other than front why on god's GREEN EARTH DID I DO THIS TO MYSELF!

Around the time I was doing poses for this beastie I started experiencing some (still quite present!) nerve pain/numbness in my hands. For other designs (like Yueffowl) I've done vector art with my mouse to give my hands a break, but try as I did I couldn't do low-res art in a way that communicated the stupid ridiculously nuanced shape I gave this crab, so it was a slow process of sketching out the color-coded body part position in little bursts, using supplemental 3D modeling for stuff I had no means to draw;

Don't get me wrong I'm quite proud of Crabaret but good lord this one was months of on and off work.

How on earth did you come up with so many funny little expressions?

I can't take all the credits on the expressions! Nearly all of them were originally drawn by Greg, but at a resolution that looked really blurry at the size the faces wound up being. I get real fussy about pixel resolution in a way that Greg doesn't, so I asked if I could redraw them at the size they're currently used. Here's a side by side of some of the old/new faces.

As you can see a lot of their soul was already there! I mostly just pushed the shape language of them and sharpened them. Greg wanted them to still feel like his drawings and they definitely do!

[blueikeproductions]

The Trigger collab animation came out and it’s the best thing Transformers has done in the current decade.

Truly a love letter to Transformers from G1 to EarthSpark, it squeezes in everything it possibly can from most media. However the catch is that it’s only animated media and the live action movies, the comics (any assorted manga, Marvel, Dreamwave, IDW & Skybound) aren’t referenced, while some Japanese exclusive stuff gets a lil’ bit more attention (understandable since it’s, y’know, Japanese fans being nostalgic about the anime they grew up with).

Transformers Go, Q-Transformers, and the Beast Wars anime got particular attention.

This shot of Liger Megatron and Green Lion Lio Convoy is especially cool.

I think initially I was expecting a Trigger animated greatest hits from select moments from each show, and while they still technically do that in spots…

It’s mostly a mega crossover with different characters interacting otherwise.

And it’s all the better for it.

I mean where else are you gonna find TFA Optimus about to smash Masterforce Overlord’s face in?

There’s no real narrative, it’s just random cool shots though the closest thing to a framing device is the PV opening with Vector Prime looking down on Cybertron across all time lines.

Regarding EarthSpark’s contributions to the short, they’re minimal. The Terrans and Mandroid don’t appear at all, which is a little bizarre.

ES Megatron appears among the other Decepticon leaders instead of being with ES Optimus on the Autobot leader side.

You’d think Mandroid would be there next to BWII Galvatron instead, but I guess not. Sadly they omitted RiD15 Steeljaw too, instead using RiD15 Megatronus Prime’s floating head.

SatAM Robotnik voice: Ah well, life is not perfect.

The main ES rep are the Maltos.

This just reinforces ES needed to be 2D, because they actually look good. Roche’s style doesn’t work in 3D.

Anyway the human cast they chose for this final shot amuses me.

Love seeing my favorite Clays being included. The lack of RiD Steeljaw (G1 Steeljaw did appear with Lio Junior and RiD15 Aerobolt though) is forgiven.

Anyhow, the specific use of the Clays, the (S3) Witwickys, the Maltos and the Onishis (this is especially funny since Koji’s mom never met her universe’s Optimus) is somehow very random, but also kinda appropriate. Like I get Spike and Dot’s families, since it serves as bookends, but the Clays and Onishis still feel a bit random. Still, including both Robots in Disguise families is a nice touch in my book!

The short ends with a different bookend as mentioned.

What starts out as G1 Prime & Megs transitions to ES Prime & Megs shaking hands. The old with the current series. It works~! I admit I’m surprised they didn’t include TFONE somehow. I know it’s technically not out yet, but there’s enough material to have had Orion and D-16 have some kind of tussle. It would’ve been an interesting way to tie it into the above scene and this one:

When it comes to general rep, the stuff that gets the most focus is G1, Beast Wars, Animated, & Galaxy Force. Cyberverse doesn’t really get anything beyond the leader shot, but there is this awesome but very random shot of Croaton over looking Holi’s Rescue Patrol walking on a beach littered with the dead bodies of the generic Decepticons from “War Dawn”.

Sucks to be you guys.

It also occurs to me the Rescue Bots cartoons appear to be omitted along with BotBots, but that might partly be due to them not having Japanese releases? I’m not sure, but it’s funny how Q-Transformers is acknowledged of all things, but not Heatwave or Burgertron. Maaaaybe that’s for the best on the later…

Still the PV is a blast and is pry the most earnest passion project that GETS Transformers vs what we’ve been getting post Aligned cartoon wise.

I still hope this leads to a proper TF anime series made by Trigger, like what happened with Gridman. We need a return to good 2D animated TF shows and not more CGI slop like WFC or S2 ES. That Beast Wars and Machines are still superior despite being retro by today’s standards says something…

The catch however is the original video is region locked…

but some fans have ripped it and posted it on their YT:

So go check it out while you can! It’s pure Energon-y goodness!

[lm-tomatito]

Espilver week day 2: Celebration

Chaotix au (Silver is part of the team)

It's Halloween and, thanks to the kids "request", Vector throws a little party for the team. As someone who didn't get to experience social events, Silver is very excited about the occasion, going around talking to everyone and showing off his costume. A certain detective can't help but look at the hedgehog with adoration.

There wasn't going to be any party, not with how little money they had this year, again. But Charmy and Cream had been very insistent, mostly the bee kid, and their faces full of excitement made it too hard for Vector to deny them at least a small celebration. Of course, Vanilla's smile and her saying how fun it'd be contributed to his decision. So here they were now, all gathered in the small backyard they had surrounded by the night sky, bright yellow lights and cheap Halloween decorations. They all had dressed up for the occasion, some more than others, but they were all having fun one way or another.

The newest member of the detective team seemed to be in very high spirits, more than usual. Him floating around and having small talk with everyone made it apparent. The hedgehog was a people person after all, it made sense that he'd be enthusiastic about parties, more justifiable by the fact that, in his time, he definitely didn't have the chance to involve himself in small gatherings. It was endearing seeing someone who was usually tired, as optimistic as he was, seemingly even more filled with joy than the children, who were suspiciously sitting in the ground secretly talking to each other.

After speaking with Vanilla for a while, Silver happily floated towards his closest companion in the team. The chameleon seemed to be watching over the not so grandiose amount of food they had gathered in a small table. It wasn't much, but it was enough if nobody got too hungry. He was mostly taking care of a bowl full of candy though. Knowing how mischievous the kids could be, Vector asked him to make sure they weren't stuffing themselves with huge amounts of sugar at such late hours. Once he noticed the other arriving next to him, he turned around and smiled at him casually.

“Are you having fun?” He asked, pretending he hadn't been secretly looking at the hedgehog the whole time. The other responded with an honest laugh. Pure happiness, his smile brighter than ever, at least in his eyes.

“Yeah! It's great! I'm so grateful to Amy for helping me with this too!” He expressed, moving a little to show off his vampire cape just to face his friend again.

“It suits you very well.” His honest words made the other laugh again, bashfully this time, a hand going to scratch the quills behind his head.

“Heh, thanks. You look good too.”

Espio knew he was referring to his costume, but that didn't stop his heart from beating faster for a bit. It wasn't the first time his silvery companion said something like that with how blunt he was with whatever was in his mind. He remained composed, making sure no color rushed to his face this time.

“I'm glad you are enjoying yourself.”

“Well, of course! This is fun! There's no danger, everything is nice. Everyone seems so happy…” A bit of silence surrounded them while Silver looked at all his friends with a melancholic smile. A look in his eyes far too common. An expression the other wanted to take away from him more and more. Before he could say anything, the hedgehog turned back to look at him with a big grin again, making a gesture with his hands like he was pretending to be intimidating. “And I get to be a scary monster!” Both chuckled softly at that, the ambience between them lighthearted again.

“I'm sure everyone is thankful for you being here. I am too.”

“That's… Nice.” His laugh was a bit shy again, eyes dancing around, admiring everything and everyone in a quick motion. “I like being here with everyone.” Bright golden spheres landed on the chameleon again, shining with content and deeper feelings both of them were somewhat new to. “I really like being with you.”

The silence this time was not a sad one, but a comfortable yet exciting one. Yellow eyes stared at gold and silver, stuck, like ignoring the view in front of him would end his world. And maybe it would. The constant thought of the hedgehog simply disappearing before him was a present fear in his mind. But, at the same time, that made him appreciate the moments they had, either laughing with everyone else, with his team, or just like now, just them quietly being with each other, feeling like only the two were present, time not moving, time no longer being a concern.

He was too bright. He was too enticing. He made him want to be closer. And closer…

Suddenly, the chameleon turned around, stopping the children trying to be sneaky, who had just let out a war cry when they were in front of him. He grabbed Charmy with his tail and made a halt gesture with his hand to stop Cream and Cheese, who were too nice to disobey, even if they had agreed to take the candy from him.

“I thought we agreed you two would wait after having dinner.” He said with the stern voice of an older brother.

Charmy had been trying to get away, and even if he had the strength to fly both of them until the other let him go, he just gave up. Maybe he just realized how boring it would be arguing with someone who was just as stubborn as him, or didn't want to go through another long lecture. Cream and Cheese simply looked at the ground slightly ashamed for their actions, more sad about not being successful and being caught than anything.

“We know. We're sorry.” Both of them said, a tinge of frustration in their voices.

Espio was about to lecture them, just as Charmy feared, when he noticed his other hand felt too light. He realized he didn't have the sweets anymore and quickly looked behind him again.

And there was Silver, casually floating, arms behind his head, legs crossed, a bowl of candy floating next to him and a lollipop in his mouth. A mischievous expression appeared in his face as he looked at his friend and the kids who were snickering with childish malice and joy.

He should've realized sooner he had to be careful of 3 and not just 2.

[indestinatus]

The silent art of gif making

The gif above has 32 layers plus 6 that aren't shown because this is part of a larger edit. I wanted to share it to give everyone a glimpse of the art of gif making and how long it usually takes for me to make something like this. This one took me about an hour and a half but only because I couldn't get the shade of blue right.

I use Adobe Photoshop 2021 and my computer doesn't have a large memory space (I don't know what to call it) so usually most of psds get deleted because I'm too lazy to get a hard drive. It doesn't really bother me that much because I like the art so when it's done, it's done. Off to somewhere else it goes.

Here are the layers:

Everything is neat and organized in folders because I like it that way. I prefer to edit it in timeline but others edit each frame. There's a layer not shown (Layer 4 is not visible) and it's the vector art. Here it is:

Now it is visible. I don't plan to make this a tutorial, but if you're interested I'd love to share a few tricks about it. I'm pretty new to the colors in gifmaking but the rest is simple to understand. Here, I just want to show how much work it takes to make it.

I opened Group 2 and here's the base gif. I already sharpened and sized it correctly but that's about it. Let's open the base coloring next.

Yay! Now it looks pretty! The edits are in Portuguese but it doesn't matter. There's a silent art of adding layers depending on how you want the gif to look but you get used to it. The order matters and you can add multiple layers of the same thing (for eg. multiple layers of levels or curves or exposure).

This was pretty much my first experiment with coloring so I don't know what I'm doing (this happens a lot with any art form but gifmaking exceeds in DIYing your way to the finished product) but I didn't want to mess up his hair, that's why the blue color is like that. Blue is easy to work with because there's little on the skin (different from red and yellow but that's color theory). I painted the layers like that and put it on screen, now let's correct how the rest looks.

I was stuck trying to get the right teal shade of blue so yes, those are 10 layers of selective color mostly on cyan blue. We fixed his hair (yay!) we could've probably fixed the blue on his neck too but I was lazy. This is close to what I wanted so let's roll with that.

BUT I wanted his freckles to show, so let's edit a little bit more. Now his hair is more vibrant and his skin has red tones, which accentuates the blues and his eyes (exactly what I wanted!). That lost Layer 2 was me trying to fix some shadows in the background but in the end, it didn't make such a difference.

This was part of an edit, so let's add the graphics and also edit them so they're the right shade of blue and the correct size. A few gradient maps and a dozen font tests later, it appears to be done! Here it is:

Please reblog gifsets on tumblr. We gifmakers really enjoy doing what we do (otherwise we wouldn't be here) but it takes so long, you wouldn't imagine. Tumblr is the main website used for gif making and honestly, we have nowhere to go but share our art here. This was only to show how long it takes but if you're new and want to get into the art of gif making, there are a lot of really cool resource blogs in here. And my ask box is always open! Sending gifmakers all my love.

[jinxedshapeshifter]

Something I don't see discussed at all is how Team Chaotix runs. Obviously, Vector, Espio, and Charmy are all detectives, but they serve different roles within that.

Vector is the team's lead investigator, and generally has a job more akin to what we view as "detective work."

Espio is the team's spy. His job is similar to Vector's, but he focuses more on undercover investigation, while Vector focuses on investigation in general. Espio is also the team's data retrieval specialist, but in his own words, "data retrieval isn't exactly [his] specialty" (although it is worth noting that Espio doesn't suck at data retrieval in Shadow the Hedgehog and he does some data retrieval in Team Sonic Racing when Team Chaotix is investigating Dodon Pa).

Charmy is, from what I can tell, basically the team's "ideas guy" but also serves a similar purpose to the team that Vector does. Due to how scatterbrained he is, he's not quite as good a detective as Espio or Vector, but I think everyone can agree Team Chaotix is not complete without Charmy, even if at the end of the day he's a mascot that sometimes contributes to a case.

Espio isn't as good at being a detective when he's not undercover, because he can't do much direct investigation when he's not undercover. Espio just isn't great at investigating things unless he can utilize his abilities in an investigation, because his abilities make him an incredibly effective spy and that's where he thrives when it comes to being a detective. Being a spy usually allows him to get information that Charmy and Vector wouldn't be able to, and that's what he specializes in. It means he doesn't have to do as much logical thinking as Vector does, which is very likely why he didn't realize Eggman was their client in Sonic Heroes; he wasn't getting information in the same way he would have if he'd been on a separate mission as a spy, and the information he was getting required doing a lot of thought on what he was hearing, which is what Vector specializes in.

It's not that Espio is a bad detective, it's that when he's sent on solo missions he doesn't have to do the same level of thinking about evidence that Vector does, so when he's presented with information that he needs to think about and doesn't look at it the same way Vector does, they don't get the same information Vector does from the same evidence (same applies to Charmy but Charmy's 6 so it makes sense for him to not be all that good of a detective yet. Charmy also tends to forget what he was told to do if Sonic Colors DS is anything to go by).

Charmy and Espio didn't realize that Eggman was their client in Sonic Heroes because they aren't used to doing the kind of logical/critical thinking about evidence that Vector is. Vector implies he knew who their client was incredibly early in the game, because he's used to thinking about the kind of evidence he got from the walkie talkie the Chaotix were using to keep in touch with their client. In fact, Espio's implied to mostly do things based on his gut feeling, based on him saying he has a bad feeling about their case in Sonic Heroes and him trusting Silver with almost no hesitation, likely for the same reason he had for not trusting their client in Sonic Heroes.

In Sonic Heroes he knew the Chaotix's client was untrustworthy based on what we can safely assume was a gut feeling, and in Sonic Rivals 2 he immediately trusts Silver likely for much the same reason (as he himself says "For some reason I trust you" which indicates he doesn't know exactly why he's decided to trust Silver).

TL;DR: Espio isn't a bad detective, he just has his own way of investigating things that don't work when Team Chaotix is investigating something as a group on the same case like they did in Sonic Heroes. Charmy is 6, so it makes sense for him to not have great investigative skills yet.

[weenwrites]

Hi, can I get headcannons about optimus prime with a human reader,where the reader is struggling with the fact that optimus chose jack over them to guard the key to vector sigma.(optimus is the guardian of the reader and the reader blames mostly themselves for being too weak,stupid and regretting every past traumatic experience they shared with optimus.They dont blame jack or optimus.)The reader tries to hide it bcs they dont want to embarrass themselves(as they see it) any further in front of optimus or burden him,but the thoughts that everyone dislikes them creep up again and so they become distant very quiet/serious.(Actually the reader is super intelligent,like ralphs level of smart,but in every possible area of knowledge not just science with great advices for everyone and everything,basically so caring deep down that they see it as weakness and hate themselves for it)Optimus knows whats wrong (he saw the readers hurt expression when he gave the key to jack despite the reader thinking that they were not noticed) and takes them for a drive after a long time to confront the reader about it.I would like like it as long and angsty as possible.

✎A/N: I'm assuming you mean angsty as in this is written from the Reader's POV, and we see all the self-deprecating thoughts and then Optimus approaches them, but my writing focuses more on the character than the reader insert, so I'm sorry if this isn't what you wanted.

[ Please do not repost, plagiarize, or use my writing for AI! Translating my work with proper credit is acceptable, but please ask first! ]

It's difficult to hide your feelings from him. He's very perceptive, much more than you'd expect, and even if he doesn't pick it up from you directly, he can pick it up from the way the rest of the team positively speaks about you. It's like how a kid thinks they're keeping something under wraps, but the adult already knows everything about it.

As your friend, he readily offers any and all support he can give. Optimus attempts to console you by expressing that by no means are your past contributions considered "small", and for each and every one, the team is grateful. But your worth isn't determined by your ability to contribute to the team, he's sure to add, as the team also values you as a friend whom they can look to for comfort or advice whenever they need it most.

He urges you to not let your own pain blind you from the truth, and he keeps reminding you of all the times you've aided the team in one way or another with your sharp wit and emotional intelligence, such as how you helped to coordinate the effort to seize the space bridge.

Though you see traits such as kindness as weaknesses, he sees them as some of your greatest strengths. Your compassion can be a source of hope and comfort that the team was able to draw from during their darkest hours. It can be difficult to recognize the affect you have on everyone around you, but it's there and he's seen the evidence. Even if you don't see it, you've changed the team's lives and he's grateful for your unwavering kindness, even in the face of adversity.

But he understands that internal conflicts can be among the most difficult to overcome, and so he knows that his words aren't an instant remedy to your insecurities. Your own doubt and insecurity can make you blind to your own strengths and exaggerate your weaknesses, making it hard to accept or believe any remotely positive thing that someone says about you. But Optimus wouldn't lie, these things he's said to you are true and honest, yet it's most likely still difficult to accept them at face value. That's alright, he'll sit through it with you.

[sysig]

You’ve caught my Wandering Eye ♥ (Patreon)

[naamahdarling]

hi, i just wanted to let you know that what you said about "They're saying they don't believe they can cause harm." in your response about the sex ed comic and medical trauma helped me start putting into words some thoughts i'd really been struggling with. it's a hard thought for me to sit with, that believing myself to be harmless is actually a high risk vector for me committing harm, but being able to pinpoint the problem means i can work on de-internalizing the idea and hopefully make me less likely to do harm in the long run. thank you for writing and sharing your experiences, it means a lot to me.

Thank you! I'm very angry about the entire thing and was concerned I probably should not have gone off. Again.

But yes, I actually think this is a thing everyone should sit with. That meaning well doesn't mean you can't hurt someone. In our daily jobs, in our relationships, in our activism.

Of course we can mean well and still hurt people. No, it doesn't mean we should drive ourselves into an anxious spiral trying to analyze every single thing we do from all angles to achieve the perfectly ideal state of doing no harm, but it does mean we need to be very aware of the vulnerability (sometimes by nature, sometimes temporarily) of those around us. Especially when we are in a position of power.

I think that medical professionals especially tend to forget that they are in a position of disproportionate power and that very small and simple things they consider normal may well be objectionable or even harmful to a patient.

I have a good team, mostly. It is very obvious they're just humans doing their best at their jobs and I like them. But they have a LOT more control over my life than they realize, or than I would prefer to give. Or if they realize, they don't know how threatening it feels. My GP is just a little guy with college debt. He could still fuck up my life in about fifteen seconds by refusing to refill a scrip or refer me to a specialist.

And I think all of us have the potential to be that person sometimes. Bears thinking about.

[autisticshadowthehedgehog]

i think they should have rouge in sonic 3 but she still works for gun. with the whole “people work for gun and research aliens” thing have them reveal that actually they just liked one and were like yeah we can hire her as a spy. this is revealed towards the end of the movie like in sa2, and half the characters (mostly other gun agents) had no idea she even worked for them and are like “what the fuck is this organisations hierarchy how many top secret furries does this org have”. every subsequent character introduced to the scu has some sort of gun connection, mostly either working for them or trying to be recruited for various purposes. they see amy wielding her big ass hammer and assume she has some sort of innate power that can be harnessed like knuckles and they use her polite and slightly naive disposition to lure her in. once it becomes clear they wanna do experiments on her she kicks their asses and during the ensuing fight someone manages to pluck one of her quills and discovers it has no energy and is just a regular ass quill. amy is deeply offended and confused by them ruining her hair. the last remaining conscious gun agent pleads with horror: “how are you this strong?” and she says “you ever heard of the gym???” and knocks him out cold. later down the line team chaotix get hired as a top secret investigative task force. the plot hinges on gun assuming they’re special in some way that makes their work more effective than human agents, mostly because vector oversold them in an effort to land a gig because rent was due, however the audience is clearly shown all of their successes over regular gun agents have been pure coincidences. once it becomes clear they’re not all that special or more effective, gun is like “do you guys not have any superpowers ?? special abilities ?? exceptional skills ??”. “i’m literally a ninja?” espio says, not knowing what more they could want. “one in five cases comes with a discount..?” vector tries. “i know how to tax evade” charmy helpfully provides.

anon you're hired

[ashen-vulture]

A Vulture In Therapy

It’s Never Been About Death (But It Is All I Think About)

-

The hospital was like a labyrinth. I remember having an anxiety attack the first time I went to inpatient therapy here, and the nurses who were talking to me were absolutely useless. They sent me to the wrong floor and were really pushy and suffocating even as I was starting to twitch and cry and hyperventilate.

Now I wore the same sticker tag every day and knew the route. Why did it require two different elevators to get to this floor? I have no clue. I didn’t build it.

My therapist and psychiatrist both wanted me to attend inpatient therapy, saying that it might help me develop some healthier coping strategies, and determine if further treatment would be worth pursuing. I think they were worried about how my suggestion for treatment overlapped with my obsession with death. People get concerned when I talk about how often I think about death. I have to reassure people over and over again that I don’t want to die. It’s a macabre and spiritual fascination. The historical, chemical, spiritual, emotional, and biological process fascinate me. Everything dies. It's one thing all of us animals of planet earth truly have in common.

And death feeds life. That has been the case almost since life has been.

Today was my next to last day. It helped to see other people who were struggling like me, especially when we helped each other with wisdom for our own lives. I made some friends I would never see again. I shared some good moments and some uncomfortable ones. Today was going to show them this other side of me, though.

Today we also ended up, intentionally or otherwise, with death as the main topic of discussion.

When you live in the south it’s hard to find anything that is secular. Even things explicitly said to be secular make sure that there is all the space for religious talk that people could possibly want. I mean I suppose it’s fair, we were talking about death and many people process death through religion.

Still, people kept trying to include me specifically in their religious talk, so when it was my time to speak…

Well…

“I’m not a religious person.”

Several people’s faces got awkward as they realized they had been trying to rope what they assumed was the only atheist in the zipcode into their church talk.

“I am spiritual though. I think about death a lot. I never learned how to mourn correctly. My family tried to hide death from me. I was never allowed to feel or express negative emotions, so even when someone died, I didn’t know how to cry anymore. I would just go numb. Besides, other people around me needed me, and I have a chronic need to be there for other people when they need me. I am a person who can reschedule grief. A month or two months or three would pass and then suddenly that grief would come knocking. My grandmother passed last year. It took me two months of time and three solid days alone to break down and cry.”

I tastefully edited out that the bourbon helped too, because two of the people there were recovering alcoholics.

“To me, the vulture is a sacred animal.”

I held up the painting I’d worked on during art therapy. It was of a swarm of black birds ascending into the sky. I know it looked grim and ominous to other people, but as I talked I could see them begin to understand.

“It doesn’t waste. I love scavengers in general. Creatures that take up the unwanted or lost. I see vultures and I see the grim cleaners of the world. Many people don’t see the value of the scavenger, but we’re far better off with them in it than without. Did you know that in areas with low vulture populations, rabies is more common? This is because without flocks of vultures to break down carcasses quickly, they are instead visited by feral dogs, coyotes, foxes, racoons, and many other mostly mammalian opportunist. This makes carcasses a disease vector. Parasites and disease can spread from conflicts over a carcass,” I realized I was beginning to overshare one of my hyperfixations. Time to wrap it up. “They rarely kill. They consume the rotten and undesirable. They prevent disease. I love seeing them because to me they are not just symbols of death, they’re life. There is no real death here, only the cycle of life reusing its building blocks to make more life. I don’t want to be embalmed when I die. I want to be put in the earth to rot, that way the molecules that make up my body can be where they belong. Everywhere. Death as a continuation of life. Everything that consumes me, I will be.”

I was used to creeping people out. The room was quiet for a bit, digesting the condensed documentary I had just unloaded on them, punctuated with my funeral plans.

What do you see when you look at me? I don’t look like a monster, not until you interact with me. My way of talking has never been quite human. I am physically the human animal. I don’t like that many humans don’t see themselves as animals. We are. We’ve tricked ourselves into thinking we aren’t, that we are something separated from the animals and plants and dirt, and that’s not healthy.

So I refuse to act. It unsettles people.

I am an animal of the dirt and sky and rain.

I just happen to wear human skin.

The conversation moved on.

The day’s session came to a close.

There was a new respect for vultures in that room. I walked away feeling lighter in mind and body. I stood on the 3rd floor of the parking garage and looked out over the streets.

I opened discord on my phone and scrolled back through a conversation with a friend.

-

tigergirltail - 06/06/2024 9:50 AM

Maybe wanting to be a therian is a symptom of being a therian. It didn't occur to me until last night that wanting to have the dreams was a sign.

ashedink 06/06/2024 9:51 AM

That’s a good point.

Kinda like how some people figure out they’re trans, not because of a presence of gender dysphoria, but by the absence of gender euphoria.

tigergirltail - 06/06/2024 9:55 AM

Wanting it is that first symptom.

Yeah, literally how I awakened.

-

We’ve been friends for so long, and we’re still finding new bridges to cross together.

Maybe I will follow you over this one too, if my therapist is satisfied with how inpatient therapy went.

Is it arrogant to try to become that which I hold in such high spiritual regard? Maybe that’s just human greed want it. There is no dysphoria here, I simply exist as I am regardless of my vessel.

But maybe I should try it. Maybe euphoria is waiting for me in an unexpected shape.

I mean, I’ll be an animal either way.

Maybe I'll be a happy animal.

[seventh-line]

Swtor: Who Gives the Best (and Worst) Gifts

The best gift-givers:

Kira Carsen

Felix Iresso

Risha

Akaavi Spar

Vette

Malavai Quinn (He just knows EXACTLY what to get.)

Ashara Zavros

Mako

Torian Cadera

Vector Hyllus (His gifts are kind of weird, but sometimes end up being practical. Mostly they're just sweet momentos and keepsakes from the places you've been.)

Raina Temple

Lana Beniko

Koth Vortena (Idk why but I just feel like this guy KNOWS how to shop and exactly what to get.)

The worst gift-givers:

Nadia Grell (She's trying so hard.)

Corso Riggs (Gave you a blaster/explosive/weapon for the 50th time.)

Aric Jorgan

Elara Dorne (Genuinely thinks her gifts are great and useful. They unfortunately aren't.)

Jaesa Willsaam (Light)

Jaesa Willsaam (Dark)

Theron Shan

Doesn't even bother:

Scourge

Zenith

Andronikos Revel (Honestly it might be he just forgets to sometimes.)

Kaliyo Djannis (She also might even have the gall to expect something from you, but wouldn't care too much otherwise.)

Arcann (Unless you can pressure him to, he doesn't see the point, and reserves gifts for very special occasions.)

The only gift you need is him:

Doc (Has absolutely no idea what to get you, and all the audacity.)

Khem Val

Lol I started this before Christmas to try and get it done before then. Anyways, as I am creatively bankrupt, send me ideas! Of any kind!